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10597944
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Bunnys Encounter
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{
"Archive Warning": "No Archive Warnings Apply",
"Category": "Gen",
"Characters": "Ken Hutchinson, David Starsky, Original Character",
"Fandom": "Starsky & Hutch",
"Language": "English",
"Rating": "Teen And Up Audiences",
"author": "by Spencer5460",
"chapters": "1/1",
"completed": "",
"published": "2017-04-11T00:00:00",
"words": "344",
"Additional Tags": "Lust at First Sight",
"Relationship": "Ken Hutchinson & David Starsky",
"Character": null,
"Relationships": null,
"Series": null,
"Collections": null,
"Fandoms": null,
"Archive Warnings": null,
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}
|
Bunny tittered girlishly at the cop’s playful come-on, her abundant breasts resting on the top of the reception desk.She might look simple-minded, but she wasn’t. Bunny knew a cop when she saw one. Beyond the man’s dimples and disarmingly rumpled jacket, she saw trouble. A wolf in sheep’s clothing. She’d learned long ago to give nothing away for free.“Mr. Peterson isn’t here,” she responded to his query.“Can you tell us when he might be, or where we might find him?” The cop leaned in further, so close she could smell his sandalwood aftershave, and he cast a toothy smile. It would be so nice for once, she thought, to be with a guy who smelled like something other than Mall Palls and beer.A blond, his partner of course, hung a few steps back, allowing Dimples to work his magic.“Well . . ,” she offered coyly. Let him think his charm is working. What could it hurt? She shimmied her shoulders fractionally, allowing him a glimpse down her low-cut blouse.His expression remained the same, however. Warm rather than lascivious. Maybe not such a wolf after all. For a minute she wished she could help him. But she couldn’t even help herself. Here she was, beholden to Jack Peterson, who only fronted as a real estate agent to hide his money laundering business. And she was neck deep in his dirty laundry.“I really don’t know,” she finished innocently.Dimples straightened then, pulling back his come-on and she suddenly felt more bereft than she thought possible. She was used to getting plenty of attention from men, but it was always the wrong kind of attention and the wrong kind of men."We have some other business in town, but we'll be back," he said.She'd like to think it was a promise. What would she give to have just one night with a dangerously decent man like this? If her big boobs and ditzy drawl couldn’t entice him, she wondered what it would take for her to get well and properly laid.FIN
|
10582209
|
Skin deep
|
{
"Archive Warning": "No Archive Warnings Apply",
"Category": "F/M",
"Characters": "Sarah Jane Smith, Mickey Smith, Jack Harkness, River Song, Eleventh Doctor, Martha Jones",
"Fandom": null,
"Language": "English",
"Rating": "Teen And Up Audiences",
"author": "by GoodDalek",
"chapters": "1/1",
"completed": "",
"published": "2017-04-09T00:00:00",
"words": "3,841",
"Additional Tags": "Fluff",
"Relationship": null,
"Character": null,
"Relationships": "Eleventh Doctor/River Song, Martha Jones/Mickey Smith",
"Series": null,
"Collections": null,
"Fandoms": "Doctor Who, Doctor Who (2005)",
"Archive Warnings": null,
"Categories": null,
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}
|
Finally, the Doctor let her pick where they were going. For that, she is grateful. Usually, she let him pick and whilst they would go somewhere exquisite, thedanger would be trailing ominously behind them in the shadows. However, she can get it right; somewhere safe, cosy and dull. A small café on earth, 2016.Yes, she enjoys the feeling of adrenaline rushing through her blood; her hearts beating vigorously against her chest; escaping from tight situations and the thrill and excitement. However, sometimes, she feels like she knows so little about the man she married. She sees the legend and the oncoming storm and occasionally, the vulnerability and loss. However, she wants to see all the pain and broken pieces that he tries so hard to hide and so she appreciates the opportunities and revelations that just sitting in a café, eating obnoxiously sugary treats and talking will bring. He is midway through talking when he spots her. Once he does, he stops, unable to remember what he is about to say and unwilling to tear his eyes away. His mouth is hung slightly open and his mind is filled with the usual stream of indecent thoughts. He will have that beautiful creature!She catches his eye almost immediately, tilts her head and smirks. Her beautiful green eyes are sparkling with mischief and playfulness as if to say ‘try me.’ And oh, he most certainly intends to. She sashays towards him and he is completely memorised watching the way her golden mane delicately swishes in the air. So much so, that when she passes him, he does not acknowledge it straight away. Once he does, he smirks. Hard to get – he wouldn’t like it any other way. It makes the pursuit much more fun and interesting. He abandons the Smith’s, who look rather confused at his abrupt departure. However, once they follow him with their eyes and see him swaggering over to a lady, they roll their eyes – after all, it’s person number three he’s flirted with in under and hour! - and return to their conversation.She is looking down at her menu, her eyebrows, slightly creased into a frown, deciding what to have, though he is certain that she senses his presence. She slowly looks up, uninterested – though he is certain that she is feigning it. Role play; he likes a bit of that too! She most definitely is his type of woman.“Captain Jack Harkness,” he says, offering his hand.She looks at his hand but doesn’t take it, and after seconds, he withdraws it. “Captain?” She says slowly and seductively and he gulps; never has he been so aroused by one word.“And you, my lovely lady are?”“Taken,” she says. He sits down and chuckles. “Not yet. We haven’t got to the fun bit yet,”She leans in – he catches a glimpse of under her low-cut blouse, and he salivates in anticipation. Suddenly, his nose is filled with the scent of her perfume. He’s not exactly sure what it is, but he likes it. Sweet like a rose, yet, like the dead of the night, dangerous. She chuckles and he is completely compelled – never has this happened for. Usually, it’s quite the opposite – people usually fall under his spell. It seems that he has just met his match and oh boy, is he excited!“It’s never going to happen,” she sings, biting her bottom lip as if to apologise, but from the look in her eyes, he knows that she is anything but apologetic – she’s enjoying this as much as he is.“Oh, trust me, I’ll be able to change your mind,” he insists, leaning in. Now, their noses are practically touching now and damn it, the air around him feels dense, sticky and hot. His breaths become shorter – he can’t help that it is rather intense. However, she seems completely unfazed and unaffected by their close and very intimate proximity. Close up, beautiful doesn’t even cut it. She has a look in her eyes – she’s fire, passionate, intense, she’ll burn him, but it only encourages him. Strands of gold curls fall on her milky skin and the rest falls on her back, wild and untamed like a princess of a warrior tribe.She leans back nonchalantly and nods her head. “I don’t believe I will,” “Will you give me a name?”“Nope,”“Go on!” he insists.She chuckles, then responds “Dr River Song,”“Ohh, let me guess, a doctor in gorgeousness and I’m sure many talents,” “Oh yes, that as well. And yes, I am very talented in ways that you wouldn’t even dream of,” she says, satisfied when his pupils dilate and when he gulps. “But, aside from that, I am a doctor in Archeology. Oh, and it looks like your time is up Captain,” she says, eyes turning towards the door of the café.
Simultaneously, from the table behind them, Martha asks, “Doctor?”
Timelord. He can manipulate time with his eyes closed and yet he is late. Late again – he is certain that River will not let him live this down!His spots her immediately as he enters the café – she’s not hard to miss with her space hair and radiance. He frowns slightly – it seems she has company; male company. That’s when he notices just who it is and the people behind him.Damn it!He quickly assesses all the possible ways he can escape, but alas – all his ideas are fruitless. There is no escape – not now, especially now River has seen him.This is not good. Very not good.A person, in theory, would be happy to see old friends. And of course, he is; he loves his friends. After all, they are the people who are there for him when he has lost his way. They are the people who make him forget the shadows of the past. They are the people who make an otherwise sad life, shine with happiness. However, as always, he loses them. He overindulges and they are stolen from him as penance. He is left older, sadder and broken.For the fortunate who do not die prematurely, seeing them also sting. For they were so innocent before him. Yes, in fairness, they got to see so much – so much more than any human would see. All the immense beauty harnessed on earth and other planets. Amazing and historical moments across time and space. The stars, solar systems and galaxies. However, he exposed them to the death and destruction and desolate, desperate realities of war. He showed them all the ugliness crawling under rocks and all the hate the world was contaminated with. He left with ordinary people who had their own ordinary and brilliant lives, and he got them hooked on time and space travel as if it were a drug, unable to commit and appreciate every day if it was not coated in the thrill, surprise and danger. And, worse of all, they were hardened by all the destruction. His friends are now soldiers and he is ashamed of what he created– dare he look? No. Usually, he ran. Made old mistakes again.However, now, he has no choice.He has to face them.It's only a matter of time that he is spotted – to his surprise, it is not River that calls him, alerting their attention and it’s not Sarah, who has already seen him as his 11th self. No. It’s Martha, spends a minute frowning at him in a ‘do-I-know-you’ way.“Doctor?” She breathes. Immediately, they all turn around; all attention is on him,
There are hugs and it is five minutes later when the Doctor takes a seat beside his wife. The waiter brings over a bowl of custard and a plate of jammy dodgers to the Doctor.“What are you guys all doing here?” He asks between mouthfuls. The café didn’t have any fish fingers, and so he settled with dipping the jammy dodgers in the custard. His friends look at him rather confused but do not ask assuming that this is just a new quirk that comes with the regeneration.“Well, it’s our anniversary and we thought we might get some people together and catch up,” Mickey explains, squeezing Martha’s arm.The Doctor smiles, custard dripping from his mouth. “Congratulations guys.”“How have you been? What have you got up to?” Sarah Jane asks simultaneously as Martha comments “New face?” They both laugh at their synchronised timing.“Yes, just one regeneration since the last,” he confirms – preferring Martha’s question as opposed to Sarah’s. He does not want to look back on what he’s been up to – he doesn’t need more guilt on top of the dollops that bury him.“And he’s been causing trouble all over the universe,” River chuckles.They all suddenly look at River; yes, they were aware of her presence – who could miss the beautiful lady with the space hair? - but they were all too focused on the fact that they were being reunited with a long-lost friend than to pay her anything more than fleeting attention.“I’m Sarah Jane Smith. This is Mickey and Dr Martha Smith,” Sarah says, despite the obvious awkwardness. However, she overlooks it, willing to extend a hand of friendship. She’s learnt that the Doctor’s companions are always amiable and so there is never any harm.“I’m Dr River Song, by the way. A doctor in Archeology and you?”“I’m a doctor… a doctor of medicine,” Martha says.The doctor groans slightly and pokes River “Don’t tell people that! Martha can call herself a Doctor, she’s a proper one. But you just rob graves and cheat by using travel “he whines. “Plus, it makes me look uncool. Travelling around with an archaeologist,”She hits him in the thigh with her elbow and rolls her eyes. “You already look uncool with the bow tie and tweed,” Then she pinches him and feigns a glare “And stop insulting my career!”The doctor huffs like a petulant child. “Hey!” “How did you two meet?” Martha asks, cutting through their banter. She has a feeling that if they are not stopped, then they will perpetually go on like this and though it is cute to watch, she’s too curious to just observe. She has to admit, there is definitely chemistry between them; that flirty sort of relationship that she yearned for when she was his companion. Then, of course, the Doctor was oblivious, almost to the point where it was cruel because was so desperately and blatantly crushing on him and it felt like he was almost deliberately turning a blind eye. She’d begin to think that maybe he just did not do that kind of thing; however, this gangly and goofy doctor proved her wrong“Umm… it’s a long story. Too long for now. Some other time maybe.” The Doctor responds rather evasively and Martha rolls her eyes – why isn’t she surprised? Same old doctor!“Never mind that,” Jack interjects. “I believe that I have found true love,” Jack says, eyes never leaving River. She offers him a sultry smile – one which the Doctor blatantly doesn’t approve because if looks could kill, then Jack would merely be a pile of dust in his chair. He has the sudden urge to remind her where they are bound but resists the urge to.Mickey scoffs “Love? Is that what you call it these days when you’re trying to be polite?” “Will you have me?” Jack asks River.River chuckles – she can feel the Doctor’s glare and she is tempted to say yes, just to have some fun with him. However, she decides to be good and shakes her head. “In anyway, anywhere,” She casts a cheeky glance at her husband, pleased with herself when she sees that he is annoyed. This, River must admit, is fun. She is so used to the Doctor, when he was younger, acting as if she didn’t matter. She was just a stranger, albeit helpful, astute and on his side, he couldn’t quite shake of that sceptical feeling, and so he’d treat her with indifference and coolness sometimes. Therefore jealousy – though it must feel hideous for him – is quite flattering for her. However, realising that she has pushed him a bit too much, she adjust her answer and places her hand on his. “no actually, I’m joking. I’m taken. And, you’re not exactly my type,” “What? Muscular, handsome and charming isn’t your type?” He asks incredulously. “What is?” Jack asks.She chuckles a bit and furtively glances towards her husband, who catches her look despite her subtlety. He gives her a smug smile and she rolls her eyes. “Man in a suit, preferably. Ridiculous, but well meaning. Excitable.” She turns to her husband and he raises one of his invisible eyebrows. Ridiculous, was he? She quickly darts her eyes to the corners of his lips, glazed with custard – yes, very much so! Sarah Jane and Martha catch this, intrigued – has the Doctor ( the man they had both loved, at some point of time) finally met someone who wouldn’t end up broken hearted? Is he even aware that his companion was not so subtly hinting that he is what she wants?Jack, oblivious, turns to the Doctor and asks “What part of earth you picked up your new companion from, because I will need to find this place,”River chuckles. “Firstly, you won’t find anyone like me. I’m unique.” She purrs. “Especially not on earth. Also, I’m not his companion.” She turns to him and smirks, placing a hand on his thigh and squeezing. “I think we have a much more intimate relationship than that,” she says suggestively, as the Doctor recovers from spluttering at her sudden contact.They are all stunned in silence and River smirks, pleased with herself. The Doctor, however, is now looking rather sheepish. His face is flushed a raw pink colour and he can’t quite maintain eye contact.“Not from earth? Are you not human?” Sarah Jane asks, at the same time as Jack spits out “Intimate?” as if the very word is a poison curdling in his blood.“Yes,” he says, scratching his cheek. “She’s… um, River here is my … wife,”“And yeah. I’m part Timelord.”“But, she’s… she’s curvy and beautiful. No offence Doc, but you’re wearing tweed and a bowtie. You were eating custard and jammy dodgers like a child. No sign of muscles – not that that changes with regeneration. How did you hypnotise her? I bet you, if she met me first, she’d have me over you,” Jack laughs and then hits a very annoyed Doctor on the back. “I’m joking Doc.”The Doctor frowns slightly and looks at River, whose busy chatting to Sarah Jane and Martha about how she’s partially Timelord. A joke, Jack said – but the Doctor cannot shake it off because deep down, he questions what the hell she is doing with him. After all, his wife is brilliant. She is not only beautiful – as Jack is fixed on – she is so much more. She is courageous – he admires her ability to stay strong in the face of adversity. To shrug and seek out something happy and fun, in a world designed to tear her apart. He is used to his thoughts racing and people struggling to keep up, but River keeps up and challenges him intellectually. She makes him feel giddy as he considers her ideas and how to implement them and fiery when he is arguing that she is, in fact, wrong. In those moments – though he would never admit it to her because he most definitely does not want to see the smug look on her face – he feels so alive and aroused. River, he thinks sometimes, is too good for him. She sits around waiting for him because he’s always late. Late to pick her up. Late in realising just how worth it she is. Late in understanding that loving isn’t saving a person from you by cruel words crafted to push them away – it’s letting them see you clearly and in turn, seeing them too.River turns and frowns at him as if she can hear his thoughts “Shut up you idiot,” she whispers. She squeezes his fingers then gets up. “Need to go to the ladies. Be back in a moment,” She disappears and he sighs.“Wow Doctor, I never thought you’d settle down,” says Sarah Jane proudly.“Yes, how did this happen?” Martha asks curiosity yet to be satisfied. “How did you guys meet? How did guys get together?” She knows that the Doctor will shoot her down and evade the question – but still, it’s worth a try.The Doctor frowns slightly remembering how they met; how the fate of their whole relationship is pretty much sealed. He clenches his fists, willing himself to close the memory; to store it in a box, lock the box and throw it down some deep hole, because now, even though he’d inevitably suffer her loss later, she was there. She was alive. She was flesh and blood. He needed to focus on that. “Um… well, it’s a bit timey wimey and complicated. But, she pretty much fell into my life, knowing everything about me and I knew nothing about her and as time went on, I found out more about her. Our relationship is backwards mostly.”“But… but how did she know about you?” Martha asks, completely perplexed. If she was in any doubt that the man before her was the Doctor, then this was only proof, because he talked in the same scant manner. He galloped miles per minute, certain that people would keep up and confused as to why people asked questions, clarifying the details he must have dropped.“She was trained to kill me but then she didn’t because she fell in love with me and then we got married.”“Kill you?” Jack frowns.“Did you ever think you would get married?” Sarah Jane asks, who too is intrigued.“No. Especially not to River. At first, I thought, marriage is too much of a commitment… you get hurt easily… my mind didn’t immediately change when I met River. I just wanted to get away from her.” Jack frowns at the Doctor incredulously as if to say, ‘why the hell would you want to get away from her?!’“Then as I got to know her, I got scared. She is my perfect match. She understands me and time travel is second nature to her. At first, I discarded the thought thinking, this is stupid. I don’t even like her. Then I started to think, she wouldn’t want me…. She would want to be stuck with me. I mean, yes, she made lots of comments indicating her interest…. But… well… She knows me. What I’ve done. She’s seen me at my worse … I mean, I wasn’t exactly accepting of her when she first came into my life. But she still wanted me, just as I am.”From behind him, there is a warm soft chuckle. However, he tenses. How was he supposed to know that his wife is was standing behind him? He scolds at himself for allowing words to gallop at a faster pace than he can control.“Hello dear. Oh, guys, I didn’t tell you about the time-“ he says in an attempt to shift the conversation. “I don’t even feel like I know you sometimes,” she says in an uncharacteristically small voice.He sighs heavily and though he desperately wants nothing more than to abandon topic about their relationship, he cannot help but respond. “I don’t feel like I know you. I see the tough and brave exterior.” He whispers.She takes the seat next to him and cautiously places her hands in his. She is aware that she has an audience and she most definitely does not want one of her vulnerable moments to be witnessed by anyone. However, she is fully aware that for them, there is no later. They will both realise that for a minute, they let their emotions run unrestrained, but after that, they will be more guarded than ever. Though it is immensely difficult, she swallows her pride and gazes at him. In a tiny voice, she admits, “But I feel like you know me. I feel like there is so much that I’d only share with you. I feel like I am the one not good enough for you.”“River,” he says as if she is stupid. After a hesitant moment, he places his arms around her waist and pulls her closer to him, so her chin is on his shoulders. He feels a little tense if he is honest. The proximity just isn’t them, after all, they spend their time so often running from or to peril, that it’s a quick kiss or hands held. However, feeling her curls tickle his neck and her skin, burning him, feels natural and comforting like a soft lullaby.For a second, River is rather shocked – her husband hardly ever initiates physical contact in such a way. Sure, he kisses her and bops her nose, but always, his touch is fleeting. Never has he been so intimate with her. It feels as if she is sat out in the sun in sultry summer’s day; she’s so content with something so simple, yet taken for granted.Jack frowns slightly – even he cannot deny, what they have, that emotional connection, is beautiful. Something he is yet to feel with someone. Sarah watches them silently, half in awe, and half sad. There is an ache in her heart that she fears will never be alleviated. Nothing can help her now, for she has loved and lost far too many times. Plus, she is old – who would want her, she thinks? Of course, Luke would tell her that she’s amazing and that any guy would be lucky to have her, but the thing was, she is never lucky when it comes to love. For Mickey and Martha, their intimacy is rather contagious. Mickey would like nothing more than to declare his undying love to his wife, regardless of how sloshy it sounds and Martha is tempted to snog her husband like there is no tomorrow. However, instead, she breaks the silence. “Sometimes, sometimes with love, you give yourself to someone else in a way you won’t give yourself to other people… but there are always going to be things that no one is allowed to see…. And after a while… after a while, you learn that you do not need to keep that barrier up…” Silence falls again, her friends all drinking in her wise words.“Okay! Cake! That is what we need to celebrate your anniversary!” The Doctor jumps up abruptly.River scoffs. “As if you haven’t had enough sugar! Any more, and you’ll be jumping around the place like a child.”“Hey!” Doctor moans.“What we need is champagne!” River exclaims. “Oh no, I can’t drink… what with…” Martha starts to say. However, she stops herself abruptly.
|
10554738
|
Book of Names Winchester
|
{
"Archive Warning": "Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings",
"Category": "Gen",
"Characters": "All killed Baddies, Some killed goodies, All kills by Sam or Dean, later on by Castiel too",
"Fandom": "Supernatural",
"Language": "English",
"Rating": "Teen And Up Audiences",
"author": "by SilverWolf7",
"chapters": "34/?",
"completed": "",
"published": "2017-04-06T00:00:00",
"words": "7,609",
"Additional Tags": "Humor, list of the dead, Hell, Purgatory, Heaven, Monster fic, Narrated by the Records Keepers, Minor Character Death, Canonical Character Death, Short Chapters, Deathfic",
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Every being (with three exceptions) goes somewhere when they die. The place they go when they die depends on a few conditions of which are listed below:1. Are they human or not
2. Were they good or bad or neutral while alive
3. Did the deeds they do after life change where they go if they don’t follow their Reaper once death has occurredThe places these Souls go are divided into three places:1. Heaven – Good
2. Hell – Bad
3. Purgatory – Non-human (includes beings that were once human but weren’t when they died i.e. vampires and werewolves)Souls that were neutral go to the place most fitting upon their death based on deeds. A Soul who killed a lot may get into Heaven, depending on the reason they kill. The opposite can also be true. A person who had no kills can be sent to Hell for other acts that don't necessarily mean a person is bad or evil. It all depends really on if said reasons match with God’s Plan.No one knows what God’s Plan is except God Himself. Don’t bother trying, you won’t figure it out.Each of these three places has a Book upon entry for dead Souls. The living or soulless don’t need to sign. These lodgers keep track of important details upon the entry to their afterlife. Mainly, it keeps track of names and makes sure that they are sorted into proper order, disorder or just to mark them off the list of the living. They are also asked to leave comments in a comments section below their information.In Heaven there are two types of Soul:1. Human (Good or Neutral)
2. Benevolent or repentant spiritsIn Hell, there are three types of Soul:1. Human (Bad or Neutral)
2. Human (Sold their Soul to a crossroads demon)
3. Unrepentant spiritsPurgatory gets everything else, bar the three exceptions.The three exceptions are:1. Angels – Natives of Heaven and God’s second made children. These beings run Heaven and don’t have Souls. They have in place of Souls, Grace. If an Angel’s Grace is destroyed, so is the Angel. A dead Angel goes to the Empty. A place devoid of everything. They cease to exist.
2. Demons – Demons run Hell and are made there. Demons are what is left of tortured and corrupted human Souls twisted into something else. If a Demon is destroyed, they don’t go back to Hell, they go to the Empty.
3. Pagan Gods – Any God thought up and made into being by the belief and faith of humans. Basically, any God that does not answer to the name Chuck Shurley. They either cease to exist when they die and go to the Empty or return to their own Realm. It depends on how strong they are through their faith base or if the way they are killed does not outright destroy them.There is a Book in each place separate to those of the normal Book of Names. In these Books hold the names of those saved or destroyed by the Winchester brothers, Sam and Dean. They are not separated because of any special qualities these Souls may have. They are separated because, once Sam returned to hunting (an event both sides had been waiting on for years) both Heaven and Hell decided to keep a tally to see who gets the most Souls. Purgatory joined in after the first Name was added into Hell’s Book. They couldn’t resist the competition. Herein lays the records of those Books.- Records Keepers of Heaven, Hell and Purgatory. Left nameless in the hopes to never end up in here ourselves.
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
Book of Names Winchester Edition
Realm – Hell#1 (Hah, winning already, Heaven!)Name – Constance Welch
Age at Death – 24
Year of Death - 1981
Death by – Suicide (Drowning)
Soul Type – Unrepentant spirit (Woman in White)
Acts - Child Murder [note: filed under temp. insanity] and Suicide
Winchester – Sam (Dean’s car [note: affectionately named ‘Baby’], drove her right on home. Her children dragged her down here.)Comments – “Do you find me pretty?”“How come my clothes had to stay all torn up?”“Why aren’t my children here?”“How come my husband isn’t here? Surely he’s dead by now, isn’t he?”Records Keeper – Constance put a lot of time on trying to get me to sleep with her. It doesn’t seem to matter that at the moment I am single. Also, I like clothes that aren’t falling off around the soul. She was angry when I answered her first comment with that. Hence her second comment. Told her that’s what she died in, that’s what she’s stuck with. She should have thought of that before jumping off a bridge.After her looks were commented upon, she immediately wanted to know why her children weren’t here either. Her face when I told her their souls went to Heaven because they were innocent of all wrong doing was priceless. Not as good was the look she gave me when I mentioned that, no, her husband wasn’t yet dead. And until his death we won’t know where he’s going (right now stuck between Heaven and Hell, my bet is on Heaven.)Constance is being housed with the soul of a pregnant woman for now. No men allowed (damn...). She’s already wailing about it. Torture to start tomorrow. I hear 12 hour shifts for her. Have fun, ladies!
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
Book of Names Winchester Edition
Realm ~ Purgatory#1 {Decided to join in this comp when a wendigo joined us here in Purgatory after being killed by a Winchester. Hope you guys don’t mind!}Name ~ Lost after transformation to wendigo
Age at Death ~ Don’t know, don’t care
Year of Death ~ 2005
Death by ~ Murder {Set on fire}
Species ~ Wendigo
Acts ~ Cannibalism
Winchester ~ Dean {Flare gun}Comments ~ N/A. Records Keeper ~ He ran off into the woods to find himself a nice dark spot to hunt. Was a bit confused after first appearing, but all souls are. Some at least talk. Hell, some are nice to begin with. Wendigos are pretty much hopeless here. They only hunt and eat human flesh and this place is fresh out of humans. Will have to watch out for that one if I smell him coming. Sometimes all one needs is to be human shaped.
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Book of Names Winchester Edition
Realm: Heaven.#1 (Welcome, Purgatory.)Name: Peter Sweeney. Age at Death: 12.Year of Death: 1970.Death by: Murder. (Drowning.)Soul Type: Repentant spirit. (Vengeful.)Acts: Innocent alive, murder in death. [Note: Revenge killed families of those who killed him.]Winchester: Dean (Good with children.)Comments: “Can I go home now?”“Can I see my mom?”“Are you an angel?”Records Keeper: Peter wasn’t too chatty, but the children who are murdered rarely are. He mainly wanted to go to his personal Heaven. He got really quiet when I told him he was now in Heaven and so couldn’t go back to his home and that his bike was destroyed. Unsure if he was more upset about not going home or his bike. He was attached to both.His face when I told him his mother was still alive and therefore he couldn’t yet see her was sad. Lucky for him, his mother will join him in Heaven when she does die. That cheered him up a bit.He just nodded when I replied yes to being an angel and grabbed my hand, so I led him to someone who could send him on to his Heaven. I am thankful he spared those last two victims he had. If he had killed them, I fear he would have crossed the line and become unrepentant and gone to Hell. No child deserves Hell. As it is, he showed he wasn’t too far gone and his Soul wanted peace more than to kill.
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Realm – Hell#2 (Hey, Purgatory! Welcome to the latest comp!)Name – Mary WorthingtonAge at Death – 19Year of Death – Lost it. Ooops.Death by – Murder (Eyes cut out)Soul Type – Unrepentant spirit (Bloody Mary)Acts – Innocent in life, murder in deathWinchester – Dean (Clever use of a mirror)Comments – “Why?”Records Keeper –You know why, Mary. You killed a lot of innocent people, because they felt guilty over the deaths of others. Yeah, you were murdered, but to re-enact your own death on innocent people? Yeah, that’s bad, sweetheart. Now, if those you killed were actually guilty...well, maybe you’d be repentant, but they weren’t. Well, not all of them anyway.She ran off before asking anything else after I answered her, imagine that. Holed up in one of the cells once caught. Solitary confinement is her punishment. For a social butterfly, that’s some of the worst torture. Seeing others would be a relief, even if they were hurting her. The Solitaries stay put. This one won’t become a demon.
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Realm ~ Purgatory#2 {Thanks all!}Name ~ Lost after abandonment by human family
Age at Death ~ Don’t know, don’t care
Year of Death ~ 2005
Death by ~ Murder {Shot}
Species ~ Shapeshifter
Acts ~ Serial Killer
Winchester ~ Dean {Gun. Silver bullet} Comments ~ “Is this Hell?”“So, it’s my Heaven then?”“Where am I?!”“Yes, my Heaven.”Records Keeper ~ He seemed to be confused about where he is. First he asked if he was in Hell. I told him no. He asked if this was Heaven then. When I said no he got aggressive, marching towards me. I turned into my animal form and flew up into the nearest tree. He is only able to mimic human forms, thankfully. When I told him Purgatory and that this place was where monsters or the non human go when they die, he stopped advancing and listened to what I was saying. I told him a bit about Purgatory and he seemed quite glad to be here, thinking it his Heaven.Considering he was a serial killer who constantly hunted human prey on Earth, this does not surprise me.Whether that opinion changes or not depends on how well he is at actual hunting. I greet people here when they arrive and I still have to run or fly or kill, myself. It is not easy here. But it is simple.
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Realm – Hell#3 (Totally getting the most here, haha!)Name – Jacob CarnesAge at Death – ??Year of Death – 1862. Death by – Execution Soul Type – Unrepentant spirit (Hook Man poltergeist)Acts – MurderWinchester – Dean (Salt and burned cross made out of his hook) Comments – “I don’t belong here!”“I was doing God’s work on Earth. They needed to be punished for their sins.”Records Keeper – Oh, I love religious types who come here, especially the ones that go all poltergeist. They are so fun to play with, because half the time they really think they don’t belong here at all. If you didn’t belong here, you’d be in Heaven. You are here, because this is where you belong in your afterlife, Jacob. You killed people on your own moral code, not God’s. Doing God’s work is meant for one person and one only. God. You can preach His word all you like, but don’t go doing things in His name. It never goes well, especially if said thing happens to be the murder of young women.Just because those girls were paid for sex didn’t mean they were evil or had to be killed for it. It doesn’t even make them lustful. Hell, I sold myself out a few times while living on the streets when I was alive and young. That’s not what got me in Hell. Jacob is being housed in with a Succubus. I doubt it will be long for him to change. He’s well on his way to demonhood already. Watching him struggle with his lust is the funniest thing to happen in the past few weeks. I’m going to watch this one. Should be great when he gives in.
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Realm: Heaven.#2 (Who got the poltergeist?)Name: Mary Winchester.
Age at Death: 29.
Year of Death: 1983.
Death by: Murder. (Fire.)
Soul Type: Benevolent spirit.
Acts: Good Hunter. [Note: We don’t get all Hunters here.]
Winchester: Sam. (Got to say her apology and protected him from the poltergeist.) Comments: N/ARecords Keeper: Mary moved straight to her Heaven. She did no talking, but seems to be waiting for her family to join her. I have no doubt her sons will be joining her, but John...he has some atoning to do. We know we got her through talk mainly. Michael is being very vocal about it. Something about it being a sign of upcoming events. I believe he thinks he is close to his rematch with Lucifer. I wish those two would stop fighting whenever they are in the same space together. It’s worrisome. We should not be killing each other over old arguments.Got anything on your end, Hell?
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Realm – Hell#4 (Not down here, Heaven.)Name – Sanford Ellicott Age at Death – ??Year of Death – 1964Death by – Murder (Riot by his patients)Soul Type – Unrepentant spirit Acts – Experimented on humans. Murder Winchester – Dean (Salt and burn) Comments – “I can make you all better.” Records Keeper – Pretty much on constant loop. Not all there, degraded somehow, stuck. Think this one liked playing mad scientist. And to think he genuinely thought he was helping people by getting them so raged up they kill. Seriously, as far as I am aware, all other spirits in there but Ellicott were destined for Heaven. Must have had an influx of new admissions up there, Heaven. Mental illness is not evil. Seriously, people say demons are the evil ones. At least people expect to be tortured down here. We don’t tell them it’s to help them like this asshole. Think I am definitely going to have a few rounds on this one. People like Sanford piss me off.He’s been put in a single cell in one of the upper levels. He’ll be staying there for eternity, with the odd visit from a demon. Mental torture for the bad psychiatrist.Poetic justice.And things have been slightly more active down here than normal. I haven’t heard anything big going on, but I’m low level. Not a peep from the Cage. Michael may be excited, but Lucifer seems normal. Seriously, sometimes I wonder if he even is in the Cage.
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Realm ~ Purgatory#3 {Not here either. Think it was destroyed and sent to the Empty.}Name ~ N/A
Age at Death ~ Don’t know, don’t care
Year of Death ~ 2006
Death by ~ Murder {Electrocution}
Species ~ Rawhead
Acts ~ Eats people
Winchester ~ Dean {Tazer in water} Comments ~ N/ARecords Keeper ~ He ran off to find himself a place to hunt. Not a lot to go on this one guys. No talking, just instinct. Let him go. As to whether things are going on, I would have no idea. Purgatory has nothing to do with the fights of Angels or Demons for that matter. I know nothing of either Michael or Lucifer except one rules Heaven and the other is in a cage in Hell.
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Realm – Hell#5 (Was it even alive at any point?)Name – Sue Ann Le Grange Age at Death – ??Year of Death – 2006Death by – Murder (Revenge of a Reaper)Soul Type – Bad humanActs – Black magic. Enslaved a Reaper. Murder. Also, racist and homophobic. Winchester – Sam (Destroyed Sue Ann’s altar and cross.) Comments – “Why am I here?!” “They deserved it! Horrendous acts against God’s will.”“It wasn’t wrong!”Records Keeper – Another one thinking they’re doing God’s work. They will never learn, I swear! Sue Ann was honestly surprised to find herself in Hell instead of in Heaven after murdering people. Just...what. Seriously, she killed people and used their blood in her altar and cross to bind the Reaper before even using the Reaper to kill those she found immoral.Yeah, sweetheart, guess what? That’s evil. After telling her that, she still thought that the people she killed were all people who should die because they offended her delicate sensibilities. She honestly thinks that these people should be killed because God would want them dead because they’re gay, because they’re from a different religion, because they’re from another country or have a different skin colour, because they oppose her or her husband...seriously deranged stuff.And she doesn’t understand it is wrong.She’s being kept in a nice torture chamber. Alastair is taking her on. She’ll make a great demon once he’s through with her. And a great torturer too.As to the whole sitch with Michael and Lucifer? Oh yeah, something is definitely stirring down here. Some high ups are on the move on Earth. More of us are being sent to possess and cause trouble than usual. Maybe you were right, Heaven.
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Realm – Hell#6 (Two in a row!)Name – Cyrus DorianAge at Death – ??Year of Death – 1963Death by – Murder (Beaten)Soul Type – Unrepentant SpiritActs – Racist Murderer in life. Racist ghost truck in death. [Note: WTF?!?!]Winchester – Sam (Phoned Dean with proper place to be.) Comments – N/A.Records Keeper – Why in the world did this guy take on the form of his truck?This guy literally haunted people as his truck. There is a truck in Hell.I...I don’t know what to do with this... He is being parked in with the Hellhounds and held in place by chains because the kennels is the closest thing to a garage we have down here. He’s already been peed on by a ton of big black dogs and he now has no workable wheels. It’s precious. The pups are using him as a chew toy, guys.Has Heaven had any vehicles show up? It’s called a monster truck, so he could have gone to Purgatory. Could a vehicle show up in Purgatory?So many questions...
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Realm – Hell#7 (Winning!)Name – Max Miller
Age at Death – 20
Year of Death – 2006
Death by – Suicide (Shot)
Soul Type – Neutral Human
Acts –Murder. Suicide
Winchester – Sam (Talked him out of killing his stepmother and Dean. Killed himself instead.) Comments – He didn’t say anything. Think he totally expected to show up here.Records Keeper – I feel a bit sorry for this kid. I mean, yeah, he killed, but he wasn’t evil or bad like most others who end up stuck here are. All he wanted was for the abuse to stop and he made it stop the only way he thought he could. Still, Hell is Hell. He’s sharing a roomy cell with his father and uncle. His Hell on Earth will be his Hell in death. Ouch. Vice versa funny enough too. He can also torture them for all eternity.
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Realm ~ Purgatory#4 {We don’t have any vehicles here.}Name ~ Goes by Mordechai Murdock
Age at Death ~ 2 months old
Year of Death ~ 2006
Death by ~ Story change {Belief it was destroyed in the fire at a guess}
Species ~ Tulpa {Thought form}
Acts ~ Murder
Winchester ~ Dean {Torched the house it was tied to through story} Comments ~ N/ARecords Keeper ~ I didn’t know we could even get thought forms here. Usually they just stop existing once the idea has stopped or disbelief wins over belief. This one though seemed to have come here through story. Amazed he didn’t end up in Hell to be honest.Yet again, even with the story, the thought form itself was never human, just an idea brought to life, so I doubt it could truly get into Hell.You’ll have to confirm that for us.Disappeared as soon as he arrived, possibly destroyed, possibly to go find a corner to take on as its own and hope for a new story to form around it. I don’t know how any of this works.Glad the story changed from it hanging girls though.
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Realm ~ Purgatory#5 {Two in a row here, too.}Name ~ Went by Dr. Hydeker at time of death
Age at Death ~ at least 213 years old
Year of Death ~ 2006
Death by ~ Murder {Shot}
Species ~ Shtriga
Acts ~ Murder of children
Winchester ~ Dean {Shot with consecrated iron bullets} Comments ~ N/ARecords Keeper ~ The Shtriga didn’t say anything. It did look at me for a bit, wondering if it should eat me or not, but it decided on not. It ran off to find itself a place to hunt. Not that it will find much in the way of food here. No one here is alive. Also, hunger is now nonexistent in death. It doesn’t stop the majority who end up here from trying to eat. Things would be a whole lot simpler if that wasn’t true.Going by instinct isn’t always the best thing, but it does keep you in one piece in Purgatory.
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Realm – Hell#8 (I’m wondering if Heaven has vehicles now...)Name – Melanie Merchant
Age at Death – Kid aged
Year of Death – Somewhere in 1910-1912.
Death by – Suicide (Slit own throat)
Soul Type – Unrepentant spirit
Acts –Murder.
Winchester – Dean (Burned her doll, which had her hair.) Comments – None. She has been heard giggling though, since.Records Keeper – This is one scary kid. I will stay far away from this one. She's an almost silent ghost kid. A pint sized serial killer. Well, she’ll fit right in down here. She’s already been taken into the capable hands of the torturers down here and is having fun screwing around with human souls. Seriously, she is going to take no time at all to turn into a demon. There was no hesitation at all in her. She likes to hurt and kill people.As to whether or not we get thought forms here. Nope. You’re alone in that weirdness, Purgatory. When you next get a soul, tell us if you get them up there, Heaven.
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Realm ~ Purgatory#6 {Deep in vampires today.}Name ~ ??
Age at Death ~ Don’t know
Year of Death ~ 2006
Death by ~ Murder {Beheading}
Species ~ Vampire
Acts ~ Fed off humans
Winchester ~ Dean {Machete to cut his head off}Comments ~ “What?”“Where’s the others?”“Luther? What happened?!”Records Keeper ~ Soon after this one came, the leader of their nest called Luther showed up. He was killed by John Winchester though, so doesn’t count. Another one came before. Big black guy called Hank. The others must have gotten away. This one was left at the nest. He was confused as to what had happened and why he woke up dead in a forest. He was curious to know where the others of his nest were and I pointed out the direction that Hank ran off in. When Luther showed up they went off in search of their nest mate and left me alone.They’re pretty nice for vampires. Just want to be left alone as a nest. When the others are killed by Hunters, they’ll join back with their mates and go back to being a family unit. They will probably hunt down others that encroach on their territory, but I don’t see much trouble happening with these guys.
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Realm: Heaven.#3 (There are no vehicles here either. Sorry, Hell.)Name: Meg Masters. Age at Death: I don’t know. Year of Death: 2006.Death by: Exorcism. (Gunshot wound and broken body from her fall after the demon departed.)Soul Type: Good Human. Acts: Nothing bad as herself. Murder and a lot of other bad things while possessed. [Note: A possessed human isn’t condemned to Hell for what the demon does in their body. That would be severely unfair for the good souls who fight, like Meg here.]Winchester: Sam. (Did the exorcism.) Comments: “I’m in Heaven?”“How did I get here? I did such bad things!”Records Keeper: She knew she was dying from the moment the demon left her body. I think she feels like she deserved death from what the demon did while inside her, but still she fought to impart all knowledge she had and handed it to the Winchesters to help in their fight. A good soul, a good woman. She was very surprised to find herself in Heaven after her death. She seemed positive that the demon’s deeds would make us look upon her unfavourably and she would go to Hell. She felt that the deeds done by the demon were done by her, because it made her watch when it did evil things.I assured her that was not the case. Her soul was still good. She fought as hard as she could and was sickened by every act the demon did while possessing her. She then spent a very long time crying. I have no idea why. I sent her off to her Heaven with one of the angels that walked close by. I hope she has a very peaceful personal Heaven. She deserves it.As to thought forms? I think we have had a few here, but not any time recently. I was not on Records duty back then.
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Realm: Heaven.#4 (My turn for two in a row.)Name: I don’t know. Died before his time. Information isn’t available.
Age at Death: I don’t know.
Year of Death: 2006.
Death by: Murder. (Shot.)
Soul Type: Good Human.
Acts: Nothing bad as himself. Beat Sam up while possessed. [Note: Didn’t do anything too bad while possessed either.]
Winchester: Dean. (Shot in the head with the Colt.) Comments: “Where am I?”“What! How did I die?! I was on the side of the road with the rest of my family!”“Possessed?! I...I want to go home now...”Records Keeper: This is one confused and lost soul. The demon who possessed him took over completely, so he does not remember dying at all. The last conscious thought he had was being in the crowd outside his apartment building with his family. He had no idea he was in Heaven until I told him. And then he was shocked with how he died. He wasn’t a violent person by nature, so hearing that he beat someone while possessed and died by a gunshot wound was quite a bit of a shock to him.I took him to his Heaven, which was his home with his young daughter and wife. That seemed to make him happy, especially when I said that their souls would likely join him when they died too.
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Realm – Hell#9 (We all might have 2 in a row, but I am still on top!)Name – John Winchester
Age at Death – 52
Year of Death – 2006
Death by – Heart stopped (Demon deal)
Soul Type – Sold his soul to Azazel of all demons
Acts – Hunter
Winchester – Dean (Made a deal to save his life) Comments – “Hello boys. Guess I’ll be staying here a while then.”Records Keeper – Holy crap this is amazing!We actually got John Winchester. The Winchesters were all destined for Heaven because of their lines or something like that. Want to explain that one, Heaven? Makes no sense to me.Still, a demon deal is a deal with a demon and his soul came directly down here after he died. He didn’t even seem too fussed about it. This man is badass.He’s been taken to Alastair for torture purposes. I think Alastair wants him for himself, as in to teach him his ways. The last one didn’t work out for him.Also, we got the Colt.It’s a good day in Hell today!
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Realm ~ Purgatory#7 {I don’t think we will get a Winchester here, though it could happen}Name ~ ??
Age at Death ~ ??
Year of Death ~ 2006
Death by ~ Murder {Stabbed}
Species ~ Rakshasa
Acts ~ Fed off humans, murder
Winchester ~ Sam {Used a piece of brass pipe organ to stab it in the heart.}Comments ~ N/ARecords Keeper ~ This one is staying out of its human form, so I can’t see a thing...As far as I know Rakshasa can’t fly, so I flew into a nearby tree until I heard it run off into the woods. I doubt it will stop hunting, though its prey will definitely change. Again, there are no humans here in Purgatory, only us monsters and creatures.Those of us who can look human are probably going to be running from this thing though. Might stay a bird a bit longer, just in case...
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Realm ~ Purgatory#8 {Anyone got a confirmed kill from this guy, let me know.}Name ~ Conrad
Age at Death ~ ??
Year of Death ~ 2006
Death by ~ Murder {Beheaded}
Species ~ Vampire
Acts ~ Security guard.
Winchester ~ Dean {Used a chainsaw.}Comments ~ “Where am I?”“Why?”“All I did was my job and defended myself.”Records Keeper ~ Conrad’s not the only one from this nest to end up here, but he is the first killed by a Winchester. The only one killed by a Winchester. No others from the nest after Conrad have entered Purgatory, which means they lived. Which means they were let go.Naturally, he was confused about where he was, since last thing he remembered was night time at the dock he worked at. He wasn’t too happy with what I told him. Even less about being dead.I was unsure about the why part, but told him all supernatural beings went to Purgatory upon their deaths. He seemed upset there was no Heaven or Hell for Supernatural beings. His job was important to him. And, considering he was the one unfairly attacked and he was defending himself when he was murdered quite violently, I can understand why he was upset.I sent him in the direction of his nest. He’ll have to find it himself, but the right direction is always a good thing to have here. I wish him luck.
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Realm: Heaven.#5 (None here, Purgatory.)Name: Angela Mason.
Age at Death: Early 20’s.
Year of Death: 2006.
Death by: Car Accident. [Note: Why do humans drive when their vision is impaired, or they are talking on the phone? We have so many souls from this form of accident.]
Soul Type: Good Human.
Acts: Fought with her boyfriend.
Winchester: Dean. (Silver stake in the chest in her coffin.) Comments: “Why?!”“I don’t belong here anymore!”“Are those boys okay?”Records Keeper: Angela never left Heaven. She was already here when Neil bought her body back soulless. Due to the ritual, Angela’s soul here saw what her body did. Usually, a soul outside the body would have no connection until both are reunited, but Angela’s body was brought back dead, not alive, and through a dark ritual. It has been slow here for the past few days and I was not needed at the gates, so I was tasked with watching over her soul. I was the one who greeted her. Her name is now in two of these books.I wonder if Neil realised how much it tortured her to know she was brought back and her soulless body did what soulless bodies do. Act on pure instinct. She is convinced she no longer should have a place in Heaven, even though she herself has done nothing wrong. She had to watch as her body killed the man she loved. She had to watch as it tried to kill her roommate. She watched as it killed her best friend, who ended up doing these things to her. She had to watch that boy use her dead body for his sexual gratification.The boyfriend ended up here. They would have gotten past the cheating eventually. The cherubs had marked them as soulmates. It happens every now and then. They had to be separated for a while. They should be reunited in a century or two, once things settle a bit.I am guessing Neil is in Hell. Put him in with a succubus for me, Hell. That boy was a horror of a human for doing this to an innocent soul.She also showed a remarkable amount of empathy towards most involved. She was asking if the Winchester’s were all right afterwards.She feels guilty for Sam’s broken arm.
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Realm – Hell#10 (Who got Beverly?)Name – Mr. Tanner (Seriously, this guy refuses to give his name)
Age at Death – ??
Year of Death – 2006
Death by – Murder (Shot)
Soul Type – Neutral Human
Acts – Torture of wife under Croatoan virus
Winchester – Dean (Saved the wife. Killed her too later on, hah!) Comments – “What the Hell happened?!”“Where’s Beverly? Where’s my wife?!”Records Keeper – So much chaos caused by this virus! Not all came here to Hell either. We didn’t get the wife, though we probably should have. She was infected with the virus after all. Apparently, because she did no actual damage to anyone, she got off on good behaviour and went somewhere else instead. I don't know where. All I know is she isn’t here like the others.This was one very confused man. He had no idea he had died, or what he did with his family. Boy will he be surprised when he finds out he helped destroy his wife and town. I don’t have that job though, so someone else will do it. Probably already done by now.I miss out on a lot manning this book. Still, it beats getting exorcised by Winchesters. I’m more a low key kind of guy anyways.
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Realm: Heaven.#6 (Beverly is here.)Name: Beverly Tanner
Age at Death: ??
Year of Death: 2006.
Death by: Murder. (Shot.)
Soul Type: Good Human.
Acts: Infected with the Croatoan virus from Hell.
Winchester: Dean. (Put down before she hurt anyone.) Comments: “What happened?”
“Why did Jake do that to me? I’m his mother!”
“I’ll never see my family again! No, I’m not going to be all right.”
Records Keeper: Barbara is just as confused because of the virus. I am unsure why she made it to heaven in the first place. It is possible it is a technicality like Hell said. She had no idea she was dead and doesn’t remember her death. The virus seems to take over fully within a few hours of infection. When I told her what happened she began crying and wanting to know why her son and husband would do what they did to her. It was...uncomfortable. I don’t usually have to deal with this type of trauma. She is going to be sent to one of Heaven’s healers to see if anything can be done to help her.She is also aware that her family except for her went to Hell. That was a mistake to tell her, I believe. But at least she won’t be waiting for them to come and she will see them again in her own heaven. I hope that helped and didn’t worsen her state of mind.
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Realm: Heaven.#7 (I forgot one. I have been busy but here she is.)Name: Claire Becker.Age at Death: 28.Year of Death: 2006.Death by: Blood loss. (Slit throat)Soul Type: Benevolent Spirit. (Death Omen.) Acts: Drug trafficking in life. Tried to help the next victims of her killer in death.Winchester: Sam. (Found her body, leading to her killer and the justice she needed to move on.) Comments: N/ARecords Keeper: Claire spent long enough as a spirit with her throat slit the wound followed her here. It is also possible she saw it as penance for the wrongs she committed in life. She seems very much at peace now that she doesn’t have to worry about anyone else dying from the man who killed her. It is rare to get a spirit who was murdered try to help other victims instead of take out vengeance. A drug trafficker led police to find justice for her and others’ death. That is quite a huge change in character, and for the best. Whatever acts she committed in life were well made up for in her benevolent actions as a ghost. I wish more souls were like Claire. She’s ready to go to her Heaven and live out her afterlife happy.
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Realm ~ Purgatory#9 {You okay up there, Heaven?}Name ~ ??Age at Death ~ ??Year of Death ~ 2007Death by ~ Murder {Stabbed}Species ~ ShapeshifterActs ~ Robbery and Murder Winchester ~ Dean {Silver letter opener}Comments ~ Aww, damn it! So close...Records Keeper ~ This Shapeshifter at least said something before running off. I made sure to shift myself into my bird form and fly into the trees after it arrived in the hope it doesn’t take my form. That would be awkward.It seemed upset to be in Purgatory. I think that has to do with it not being done with its heist on the bank.
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Realm: Heaven.#7 (I am fine. Things are getting confusing up here.)Name: Thomas Gregory.
Age at Death: 38.
Year of Death: 2007.
Death by: Murder. (Shot.)
Soul Type: Repentant Spirit. (Vengeful.)
Acts: Priest in life. Confused and thought himself an angel in death.
Winchester: Sam. (Summoned Thomas’ spirit so he could be given his last rites and move on.) Comments: "I’m sorry. I got confused.""Does this mean my sins are forgiven?""Thank you."Records Keeper: I think Thomas thought he would be sent to Hell for his actions after he died. Thankfully Sam and Father Reynolds were able to talk him into seeing the truth and he agreed to moving on to his afterlife with not much trouble. All the victims of his were destined for Hell or needed redemption. Let’s hope Father Reynolds helps his wayward members of his church into atoning for the murders they committed for an angel that doesn’t exist. There is still hope for them.He apologised for thinking himself an angel and his acts. He seemed surprised when we did forgive him. He wasn’t a bad man and didn’t deserve Hell, but he knew what he had done after he died was bad.He thanked me, before being shown to his Heaven.He is now at peace.
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Realm – Hell#11 (You get the bitch, Heaven?)Name – Jonah GreeleyAge at Death – 58 Year of Death – 1992Death by – Car accident (Hit by a car) Soul Type – Unrepentant Spirit (Same victim, but kills others via car accident)Acts – Re-enacts the night of his death. Other innocents got caught in the crossfire of his revenge and died. Winchester – Sam (Salt and burn) Comments – “Is my wife here?”“Unlike that bitch who killed me, I remember everything that happened. Yeah, I’d say fair’s fair.”Records Keeper – This guy wasn’t much of a bad guy. I hate it when Souls come here when they were pretty much decent people in life and didn’t do that bad after death. I mean, this guy basically was just after the one woman. It’s not his fault she ran to the road for help and he wanted her to stay with him to get revenge.Well, okay, yeah it totally is. And he knows it. He was more interested in wanting to know if his wife was here or not. Marion hung herself and people have this notion that suicide is an immediate trip to Hell.That’s not always the case. Either way, Marion is not here.He seemed to think that is a good thing and fair before being taken off to his eternal damnation.I didn’t look up what they’re doing to this guy, but I am betting it involves hooks and hunting tools. Eh, not too interested in this guy personally.
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Realm: Heaven.#8 (Molly is here, Hell.)Name: Molly McNamara.Age at Death: 28.Year of Death: 1992.Death by: Car Accident. (Drove off the road into Jonah and then into a tree.)Soul Type: Benevolent Spirit. Acts: Re-enacted her death. Winchester: Sam. (Convinced her to move on after taking her to her husband, David.) Comments: “Is this Heaven?!”“Did I kill any of those people?”“If it’s possible, thank Sam for me.”Records Keeper: Molly seemed surprised to find out Heaven existed. Since she was so nervous about moving on to the afterlife, but knowing it would be unfair to her husband to stay with him now he has moved on, this makes sense. Also her only other reference for moving on in spirit terms was a salt and burn. After finding out that she may have caused 5 fatal car accidents in the 15 years she was stuck in the loop, she seemed overly worried that she may have killed them. Her only victim was Jonah and that was an accident.She also asked us to thank Sam for her. We will not be doing this. We told her it wasn’t possible, which was a lie, but it was better than telling her the truth. It would be cruel to mar her last moments on Earth with thoughts of the abomination with demon blood and Lucifer.Still, it was a nice thing Sam did. I find it...odd.
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
Realm ~ Purgatory#10 {It’s a werewolf today!}Name ~ GlenAge at Death ~ ??Year of Death ~ 2007Death by ~ Murder {Shot}Species ~ WerewolfActs ~ Murder Winchester ~ Dean {Silver bullet}Comments ~ “I don’t understand. What happened?”“I’m dead!”“I’m a werewolf?”“How?”“Why me?”Records Keeper ~ Oh, the werewolves are always a tricky bunch, especially the ones that aren’t of pureblood stock. They never remember actually being a werewolf. This guy was probably a good man before being turned. He doesn’t even remember that. He was killing hookers to eat. He walked off before I could really explain things. It doesn't really matter which way he goes. He doesn't understand what he is, or how Purgatory works and I can't leave my post.He was aware on some level he was dead though, because the gun didn’t kill him right away. Oh, another one. Need to write my next record.
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
Realm ~ Purgatory#11 {Wow, Heaven, you are wrong about Sam}Name ~ MadisonAge at Death ~ ??Year of Death ~ 2007Death by ~ Assisted suicide {Shot}Species ~ WerewolfActs ~ Murder Winchester ~ Sam {Silver bullet}Comments ~ "Oh, Sam...thank you.”“He was crying as he did it...”Records Keeper ~ Oh, wow. This poor woman. She was turned only a month ago and just couldn’t keep on going after finding out that she was the werewolf monster the Winchesters thought she was.She wanted Sam to do the deed and ‘save’ her from herself. And he did. One shot. Death was instant. He wanted her to no longer suffer, like she wanted.Holy shit guys, there is no way someone as sweet as Sam is an abomination, I don’t care what Heaven says. Nope. An abomination wouldn’t cry over the death of a werewolf. I am almost disappointed Madison didn’t bite him just so when he dies I can give him a big hug. I know we’re not meant to pick favourites but Sam is totally mine guys.
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
Realm – Hell#12 (Well, this was tame...)Name – Walter DixonAge at Death – ?? Year of Death – 2007Death by – Evisceration (Ripped apart by angry ghosts) Soul Type – Neutral Soul Acts – Summoned ghosts to murder people who destroyed his work. Winchester – Sam (Tried talking him down. Idiot destroyed his own talisman in retaliation.) Comments – “Why am I here?!”“They’re the ones who ruined everything. There was just one more to go!”Records Keeper – Hahahahahah! Seriously, this guy is just sad. If he hadn’t gone on a killing spree using ghosts as his weapon of choice, he probably would have gotten into heaven. He wasn’t really a bad person, jut pissed off about his work being destroyed.Then he decided to kill the people he blamed for it. Yeah, not nice, but not exactly evil, you know?This guy just got the shit end of the stick and took it out on those who got the candy flavoured half because screw them, right?He has no idea why using ghosts to kill ended up with him in Hell. And if we’re going to talk about favourites... I think I am supposed to say Sam, because he’s important to Hell for whatever reason, but I’m going to say Dean. Dean kicks ass. Sam, not so much. I don’t even know why he’s important, only that he is. Heaven, any ideas why? I’m too low level to be told important shit like this down here.
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
Realm – Hell#13 (Look guys, the boys can share!)Name – Dolores GlocknerAge at Death – 42 Year of Death – 1976Death by – Murder (Head bashed in by angry inmates) Soul Type – Unrepentant SpiritActs – Murder. Lots and lots of murder. Winchester – Sam and Dean (They salted and burned her together, aww.) Comments – N/ARecords Keeper – This bitch is gonna fit right in down here! No real need to torture her into becoming a demon, she’s already halfway there. We’ve already got her set up torturing. She loves it, because of course all the souls she tortures are bad souls and she hates bad people. Hahaha, the irony. This is like Heaven to her. It’s kind of scary, really. That Hell could be someone’s idea of Heaven. Still, she isn’t the first to fit right in down here without any torture to get them to a place where they can be made to torture back. Hmm, maybe we should take her off torture duties and lock her up forever and throw away the key. She can stay in solitary unable to torture for the rest of eternity. That would be a fitting Hell experience for her.Going to try and get this one to stick, but doubt it’ll happen. Hell seems pretty damn busy lately. Any soul coming down here recently is set to become a demon, unless they’re better suited elsewhere. And she does fit right in and is perfect demon material.I wasn’t so damn lucky, naturally. I was just a shitty person who did some pretty stupid things...
|
10564320
|
shevine drabbles
|
{
"Archive Warning": "Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings",
"Category": "Gen",
"Characters": "Adam Levine, Blake Shelton",
"Fandom": "The Voice (US) RPF",
"Language": "English",
"Rating": "General Audiences",
"author": "by hirelan57",
"chapters": "3/?",
"completed": "",
"published": "2017-04-08T00:00:00",
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|
prompt #1: person a: *wearing a band tee*person b: oh cool! i'm wearing a band tee too!person a: ... no you're not that's just a plain white tee- oh my go____________ Blake had woken to the alarm Adam had set for 6 a.m. It was some trashy 90’s band that Adam had insisted upon over Blake’s first choice of some song by Dolly Parton. The pounding bassline made Blake’s ears bleed, but he would never admit that to Adam’s face because this happened to be his wife’s favorite song, and he always played it when he was with her. Blake wasn’t even convinced Adam liked the song, but it had too many memories wrapped around each lyric for Adam to feel anything but love for it.He rolled over in the bed, feeling Adam’s feet collide with his. He was still asleep, lightly snoring. His hair was strewn across his face, covering most of his features. Still, he was breathtaking, the simplicity of him. He reached across his slumbering frame, and grabbed his phone from the bedside table. He knew his passcode like the back of his hand. It was a complicated set of digits which symbolized the date and time of his daughter’s birth.He quickly turned off the alarm before it had the chance to wake him. He was relieved when all the deafening pounding produced a mere tossle from the rockstar. Blake supposed he was used to it. He rolled his body to face Adam’s. He marvelled at the way the sheets outlined his silhouette so expertly, and the way his breath forced his hair into the air, and then back across his face. It was incredible.It was too early for them to be awake considering the time they had found sleep. They had been on the town most of the night-mingling and “socially” drinking. They were corpses by 3 a.m. That’s when Adam had offered his home as a place to crash for the night. Blake agreed. He’d been in Adam’s house plenty of times, but never in his bed, at least not with him. It was new territory that Blake welcomed.They stumbled into the house, smacking every wall, and leaning against each other for support as they practically crawled up the stairs, littering the floor with pieces of their clothing. Blake’s jacket came off in the living room, Adam’s shirt in the hall. The stairs were covered in Adam’s jeans and belt, and Blake’s flannel and white t-shirt. They were both clothed only in their boxers by the time they collapsed into Adam’s king. Both laid on their side, Adam unconsciously nuzzled himself deep into Blake’s chest. Both were too exhausted to care. It wasn’t until this morning when reality started to set in. Blake was next to Adam, hand on his chest, feeling his heartbeat. He was warm.Adam had now rolled to his back, but his head was still crooked in Blake’s direction. Blake gently rolled off the bed when the sunlight began to break through the window. It wouldn’t be long before Adam woke, and he had a surprise planned for the rockstar. He walked over to Adam’s closet, and sluggishly pulled one of his oversized white t-shirts from the hanger and a pair of sweatpants from the drawer. He assumed he wouldn’t mind. He took one last look at the sombering frame, and headed downstairs.He ravished through Adam’s cupboard and collected the supplies to make his favorite: blueberry pancakes. It was the only thing he always talked about when they were together. He figured it couldn’t be nearly as hard as it looked. If Adam could do it, so could he. Surely enough, the box provided much needed directions. As he added the fresh blueberries to the mix, he found that he’d munched on more than he realized. “Oh well,” he thought, and added them to the batter.They were just beginning to brown in the pan when Adam wondered down the stairs, rubbing his eyes.“What the hell are you doing down here, Shelton?” Adam asked, stumbling across the floor, just barely making it to the bar to sit down.Blake grinned as he watched Adam’s face fall in his hands. It reminded him of a time a few months ago when Adam stayed with Blake when he was sick with the flu. Adam was needy, and Blake was caring. It was a gentle two weeks. Alternating between rubbing Adam’s back in the bathroom, laying him back down in bed, and stroking his hair as Adam nuzzled his head into Blake’s neck, the two were never apart. That was the only other time Blake and Adam had shared the same bed, but like last night, the circumstances were less than ideal.Blake plopped two stacks of pancakes down at the coffee table, coming back to usher Adam over to the couch. His skin was still warm to the touch.He sat Adam down on one end of the couch, and seated himself on the other. As the morning progressed, the space that was once between them had shrunk dramatically. Adam was laying against Blake on the couch with his feet sprawled on the arm and his head in his lap, munching contently on his pancakes. Blake admired the frame of the man. He was small and gentle, and still in the early morning hours, he smelled like fresh linen and her.He had slumped into loose Levi’s and a KISS sweatshirt.“Long night last night, wasn’t it?” Adam questioned, making small talk, assuming the silence was finally making him uncomfortable.“I don’t even remember it,” Blake said.“Well that’s something,” Adam giggled, “if you don’t remember it, I’m shocked we’re still alive,”They giggled uncontrollably for a few moments before Adam wiped some blueberry juice off his sweatshirt.“Oh cool, buddy, I’m wearing a band tee too!” Blake said enthusiastically.Adam looked puzzled for a moment. “No you’re not, that’s just a plain white tee-oh my god,” Adam laughed.“You’re my dumbest friend,” Adam said, playfully hitting the larger man’s arm.“You mean I’m your friend?” Blake playfully questioned.“Don’t push it, Shelton,” They went on eating their breakfast, Adam not even realizing that Blake was wearing his sweats. It was the perfect morning.
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
Adam has a panic attack in the middle of the night, but luckily Blake is there to calm him.___________________________________________________________________________________“Say it again,”
It was 3 am, and they couldn’t sleep, Adam couldn’t sleep. It was all too familiar. He was shaking slightly, his muffled cries filling the room, just as they had only an hour earlier.
Blake ran his knuckles across his back, feeling at the curves of his spine as he worked his way from his lower back to the tip of his hairline. “It’s okay. I’m here,”
The richness of his voice evened Adam’s breaths and calmed the storm in his bones. He had this way about him. He was calm, more calm than she had ever been. Adam loved her, but even she wasn’t capable of soothing his loudest nightmares, but he was. He was the calm.
“Say it again,” Adam repeated, his voice clear and defined.
“I love you.” It was the third time tonight that Adam had woken. He’d fallen back asleep after each before, but Blake didn’t. He lied awake, watching Adam toss and turn, and sometimes, in his quietest moments, lie completely still, motionless, peaceful.
Adam had never confided in him why he had these attacks, and Blake never asked. He just did what he did time and time again. He held him, whispered to him, sang to him, and gave him all the comfort in the world until slumber overtook him again. This time was different. His speech was not clouded by exhaustion. He spoke to Blake like he’d never fallen asleep at all. He sounded clear.
“I’m scared,” Adam whispered.
“I’m here to protect you,” he said calmly, hoping that the nightmare they were in would soon be over. He laid his hand across Adam’s back and began rubbing it gently. It soothed the both of them.The first time was some time shortly after season 1 of The Voice. Blake and Adam had partied until 4am. Both were too far gone to drive, so Adam offered his trailer to crash in. They’d barely made it inside the door before they collapsed on the floor. Blake woke up to Adam’s screams. His eyes were still closed, he was still asleep. It was horrifying, and since that time, it’s never gotten easier. Blake, more awake than he’d been all night, pushed himself against the headboard, and began running his fingers through Adam’s hair. He had resumed shaking, his breathes rattling the bed.
“Here, feel my heartbeat?” Blake asked as he grabbed Adam’s hand from under the cover and pressed it to his chest, “Just focus on that.”
Adam closed his eyes, almost feeling a sigh of relief. He had him, he wasn’t going anywhere, no matter how many times his mind tried to convince him otherwise. He wasn’t going to leave. He wasn’t going to shut him out. He just had to fight all the noise.
Blake could hear Adam mumble through the thickness of the air as he laid curled up in his embrace.
“I don’t want to lose you, I can’t lose you, I can’t lose you,”
It broke his heart to know how many times Adam had been hurt. It broke him.
“You’re not going to lose me,” Blake said, “I’m staying right here, okay? You don’t have to be alone.”
He searched under the blanket for his other hand and held it close to his face. Adam nuzzled his head in the crease of Blake’s neck. He didn’t mind, even though he’d told Adam hundreds of times that no matter how many times he showers, the hairsprays doesn’t all come out, and it tickles, but tonight, he didn’t mind one bit.
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
His phone buzzed on his nightstand. It would have been ignorable if it wasn’t that wood amplified the sound. Plus, he was already awake, so, whatever it was, it couldn’t have agitated him any more than he already was. However, the name on the caller ID was going to test that fact.
“Ya’know Shelton, sometimes I wish you had the common sense to know that calling me at 3:30 in the morning when I am in the middle of the best night of sleep I’ve had in weeks is going to end with me cussing you out and hanging up.”
“Ya’know buddy, I just want to let you know that I am way too drunk to understand what you said just now,”
Adam huffed in annoyance and buried his head deep in his blankets. They were so warm.
Damn it, Shelton.
“Why are you calling me?”
“Because I missed your voice so much,” his voice was mixed with alcohol and sarcasm. His favorite.
“
Shelton.”
“Okay, my flight leaves in two hours, and I’m stuck at the airport with nothin’ to do. I didn’t want to wake Gwen, and Pharrell’s outta town,”
“Glad I was your first choice,”
Blake’s voice was gravelly and stupid. It was seriously the dumbest thing he’d ever heard.
“At least call a cab.”
______________
Adam gets up at 3:41, and puts on the one t-shirt that Blake doesn’t hate. He looks in the mirror. He looked as exhausted as he felt. Nonetheless, he pulled on a pair of gray sweatpants and made coffee.
Blake shows up at 4:01. He smells like aged Sangria. “Please go take a shower.”
He laughs and stumbles off. Adam was shocked he didn’t run into the wall.
_______________
“WHY DO YOU ONLY OWN SHAMPOO FOR FEMALES?” made Adam wonder why the hell he ever gave Blake his address in the first place, ever.
“THIS CONDITIONER COSTS MORE THAN MY RANCH,” made Adam want to throw something heavy at Blake’s head.
“DO YOU HAVE BARS OF SOAP THAT DON’T SMELL LIKE LAVENDER?” made Adam actually open the door and throw something at his head. He didn’t feel guilty when Blake cried out in pain. Blake should just be lucky that Adam didn’t throw something hard enough to kill him.
_______________
Adam was halfway asleep with his head leaning heavily on his hand when Blake walked into his bedroom. His hair was still wet. “My clothes are gross.” Adam throws his hands in the air, and made that one face that communicates:
does it look like this is a problem I created?
Blake just laughed and pursed his lips into the best puppy dog he could muster. Adam rolled his eyes and waved at Blake to help himself. As he was looking for clothes that could possibly fit him, Adam screamed into a pillow.
When Adam’s face resurfaced, Blake was no longer in the room. Adam knew better than to think he’d left.
“Adam! Can I have coffee?” he called from downstairs.
“I don’t care,” Adam called back.
He crawled back under the covers and waited for the apocalypse.
Blake came back before Adam had a chance to fall back asleep. “You don’t seem happy to see me,” Blake sulked.
“It’s 4:30 in the morning,” Adam said, his voice muffled by his sheets, “you’re lucky I haven’t killed you yet.”
“So, I take it you’d kill anyone else, but because it’s me, you stray away from your psychopathic tendencies?”
Blake was holding a Laker’s coffee mug that was a slightly discolored from being put through the wash so many times. It was Adam’s favorite cup. Now he’d have to burn it.
Blake also looked more ginormous than usual from Adam’s vantage point on the bed.
“You’re so big that it’s actually pretty terrifying. You could, like, eat someone.”
Blake smiled and his dimples stabbed him in the soul.
Shit.
__________
4:59:
“I gotta leave soon,”
Adam was sitting cross-legged on his bed. Blake was just laying on it. (Adam was pretty sure Blake couldn’t sit cross-legged if he tried.)
Adam messes with the hem of his “Soundgarden” shirt that Blake was now stretching out. “I know.”
Blake’s had three cups of coffee and finished Adam’s box of fruit loops. He also smells like Adam’s shampoo. It was unsettling.
___________
“Please don’t ever write another song like “Animals” ever again. I just don’t feel the same way, buddy.”
Adam rolled his eyes for the 5th time. His humor was sickening.
They were both laying down now, and Adam turned his head and looked at him.
“You’re my dumbest friend.”
“Wait, I’m your friend?”
“Don’t push it, Shelton.”
_____________
When they hug, it should be unfamiliar, but it isn’t.
Blake was running his hand through his hands when he said, “I’m gonna be late.”
The alarm clock blinked 6:50 before Blake rolls out of bed and hurries down the stairs. Adam follows, the faded Lakers mug in his hand because he didn’t want the smell of coffee to linger.
Blake said something about the flight, but Adam wasn’t really listening. He said something about Oklahoma, but Adam still wasn’t really listening. It wasn’t until his name was emphasized that he really started to listen.
“Huh?”
Blake just smiles. Whatever it was, it obviously wasn’t that important.
“I’ll text you when I land, buddy,”
“You really don’t have to,” Adam said, “I think I’ve seen enough of you for one day.”
They both shared an equally exhaustion-filled smile before Blake left, and Adam crawled back upstairs.
He fell back into bed, and thanked God that Blake was finally gone.
|
10548842
|
Michirus Vision
|
{
"Archive Warning": "No Archive Warnings Apply",
"Category": "Gen",
"Characters": "Sailor Neptune, Sailor Saturn",
"Fandom": "Bishoujo Senshi Sailor Moon | Pretty Guardian Sailor Moon (Anime & Manga)",
"Language": "English",
"Rating": "General Audiences",
"author": "by orphan_account",
"chapters": "1/1",
"completed": "",
"published": "2017-04-05T00:00:00",
"words": "341",
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I don't own Sailor Moon characters. Michiru smiled while Hotaru pulled a blanket up to her chin. ‘’You’re a wonderful helper. You always help with cleaning and cooking. A tiny bit of cooking,’’ she said. Michiru viewed Hotaru’s smile and departed. She walked into her chamber at a snail’s pace.*I remember dreading Hotaru as Sailor Saturn. I remember seeing the Silence Glaive. I remember Sailor Saturn wishing to annihilate one enemy with the world.* Michiru began to frown. *I remember Sailor Saturn defeating the enemy prior to being a baby again* she thought. Another smile appeared.*I also remember viewing Hotaru growing every single day. Perhaps she’ll be Sailor Saturn again.* Michiru’s frown returned. She collapsed on a bed and closed her eyes. She found herself in a dark world. She gasped after she saw a familiar form.Sailor Saturn frowned at Michiru as she held the Silence Glaive. She raised it before she smiled. She focused on Michiru’s wide eyes. Sailor Saturn brought the Silence Glaive down.The last thing Michiru saw was blood.Sailor Saturn wasn’t present in the chamber after Michiru opened her eyes. She was still present in other memories.Michiru’s body trembled. She shook her head in disbelief. *Sailor Saturn will return?* she thought. She got out of bed and ran out of her chamber. Michiru’s wide eyes settled on Hotaru’s empty bed. She gasped.Michiru ran into the kitchen and saw Hotaru. Her eyes were on the latter as she stood on a chair and chopped carrots. ‘’Hotaru!’’ she exclaimed. She viewed Hotaru looking back.Confusion filled Hotaru’s eyes. ‘’I’m helping you with lunch,’’ she said. She raised the knife to chop another carrot. Hotaru brought the knife down and sliced Michiru’s finger. She dropped it before she gasped. She viewed Michiru wincing.Tears formed in Hotaru’s eyes.Michiru bandaged her finger. She smiled at Hotaru. *My vision. Sailor Saturn won’t return* she thought. Michiru continued to smile. ‘’Let’s go to a restaurant for lunch.’’ She watched as Hotaru smiled and nodded. The End
|
10540887
|
Honour
|
{
"Archive Warning": "No Archive Warnings Apply",
"Category": "F/M",
"Characters": "Female Shepard (Mass Effect), Garrus Vakarian, Javik (mention)",
"Fandom": "Mass Effect",
"Language": "English",
"Rating": "General Audiences",
"author": "by rayvealing",
"chapters": "1/1",
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Cold feet traced familiar steps, soft footfalls providing an eerie change from the usual thud of military boots. The bright lights of the Normandy were dim, barely enough for Shepard to see the contours of her ship as she navigated through the crew deck. It reminded her of moonlight.She stood, elbows against the hard surface of the counter, hands gripping the scalding mug she'd just filled. The day had been rough, and she was thankful that her restless hours at least provided her with the opportunity to find some peace. Datapads had been left on her desk, armour prepared for the next mission, and daily checks had been completed. Now, in the artificial night of her ship, she was finally alone with her thoughts.Today, though, they were more haunting than usual. Words continued to ring in her ears, until they threatened to deafen her. Her knuckles were white from her tense grip, and she tried to relax as she took a sip. It didn't work as well as she'd hoped."Shepard?"The door sighed as it shut. The unexpected presence startled her; it was the first time any of her crew had been awake during these hours, and she hadn't expected that to change."Garrus." She smiled, only small, hoping that he wouldn't notice her tension. "Hi.""Trouble sleeping?" He leaned against the opposite surface, brow plate raised with his question. Shepard forced another small smile, nodding slightly as she did so."Yeah. Today was rough. Not that every other day isn't rough, but today just hit me a bit harder than usual." She took a long drink of her coffee, thankful for the warm spreading throughout her body. "What about you? I've never seen you up this late before. Something on your mind?" He shook his head. "Nothing worse than usual. You know, the millions of lives that I'm now responsible for, the ruthless calculus of war just looking over my shoulder, angry Krogan and Turian above my head. Same old, same old." He laughed quietly, his deep, throaty, dual-toned laugh. Shepard had a genuine smile thanks to that. "But you, Shepard," his serious tone hung in the room. "You're more stressed than usual. If that's even possible. Speak to me." She let out a breath she wasn't even aware she was holding, and Garrus motioned for them to sit at the table. The silence seemed to permeate the air, and Shepard felt a million eyes on her."Shepard." Another drink of coffee, another long sigh, another avoidance of any eye contact."Grace."The use of her first name made her look up, and Garrus took her hand in his. Mandibles fluttered against his face, and the concern in his eyes pressed Shepard further. "It's Javik." She started, and this clearly took Garrus by surprise. Still, he squeezed her hand gently as a show of support, and as indication she should continue. "He was angry. As usual. I went to speak to him, I wanted to see how he was doing, and he started questioning my decisions. As usual." She chuckled, but her sombre expression quickly returned. "He didn't understand how I could be so forgiving, so accommodating in so many situations. He wants me to be ruthless, to step on anyone who gets in my way. I can't do that, Garrus. I can't." "I know, Shep. I know."She sighed once more. "He said that I was hoping to end this war with my honour intact. I am. I still want to be an honourable soldier. I don't want to have lost all my friends in the effort to save them. I want to have the best outcome, not just defeating the reapers, but uniting us all. I told him that. I told him." She was shaking now, and took a last drink. Her stare lingered at the bottom of her empty mug, and silence swelled until the room was almost bursting. Voice quiet and shaking, she brought her gaze to Garrus. "Stand in the ashes of a trillion dead souls, and ask the ghosts if honour matters."Garrus hummed deeply, the rumble of sound coming from deep within his chest. "It changes nothing. If honour matters to you, then it does. It's the basis of who you are, Shepard. You are an honourable soldier. You lost your family on Mindoir, and chose to fight so others didn't suffer the same. You lost your squad on Akuze and still came out sane. You went against the Illusive Man in the interest of the rest of the Galaxy, regardless of the repercussions it had for you. You turned yourself in to the Alliance because it was the honourable thing to do, even though you knew you would be punished for working with Cerberus. You're an honourable woman, Shepard. It's in your blood.""But that's the problem!" Her words pierced the air, hanging between the two momentarily. "That's the problem. He's right. Billions, trillions of people have died because of the reapers, and I'm concerned about what people will think of me once they are defeated. It's not even guaranteed we will send them back to whatever hole they crawled out of.""Shep-" "Don't." Shepard interrupted, and Garrus pulled his mandibles close to his jaw. "I didn't even know what to say after he dropped it on me. I just stood there. The silence was my answer, he said. As if I'm supposed to have any sort of response to an angry, vengeful Prothean." Shepard sighed again, eyes low. "It's so hard Garrus. It's so fucking hard, and I don't know if I have it in me anymore." Garrus stood with that, and pulled Grace up to stand with him. Tears started threatening to fall as he took her into the elevator, escorting her back to her cabin. She was actually thankful for this silence, and leant into the turian to feel his warmth and dull vibrations from sub-vocals her human ears couldn't understand. They were sat on her bed now, her legs crossed tightly and his ungloved hand reaching to stroke the stray hair away from her face. "Grace, you can't feel guilty for this. Of course you want the best solution. We all do. Your methods differ from Javiks-""A mild understatement."He laughed quietly."You still get results. You can manage to pull everyone out of the fire before they even get burned. That's not a matter of honour, that's a matter of humanity. Don't feel wrong for keeping your humanity."Shepard smiled a genuine smile. Her hand held his face, scarred mandible against her soft, human skin. "I don't know where I'd be without you, Garrus.""Probably the ass end of nowhere, shouting at Joker and waving your gun in the air screaming about reapers.""Alright, big guy, I'm not completely helpless without you." Grace struggled to stifle a yawn, eliciting a laugh from Garrus."Then why do I have to tell you when to go to bed? Come on. Get your ten toes under the covers." "Only if your four toes join me."Mandibles splayed in a smirk, Garrus laughed. "Aye aye, ma'am."
|
10540086
|
no season can last
|
{
"Archive Warning": "Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings",
"Category": "M/M",
"Characters": "Kim Seokjin | Jin, Kim Namjoon | Rap Monster, Min Yoongi | Suga",
"Fandom": "방탄소년단 | Bangtan Boys | BTS",
"Language": "English",
"Rating": "Teen And Up Audiences",
"author": "by emymyg",
"chapters": "1/1",
"completed": "",
"published": "2017-04-04T00:00:00",
"words": "2,897",
"Additional Tags": "Alternate Universe - Royalty, Seasons, Spring, Winter, Snow, Cold, I don't know how to describe it i'm sorry, Flowers, Violets, Angst",
"Relationship": "Kim Namjoon | Rap Monster/Kim Seokjin | Jin",
"Character": null,
"Relationships": null,
"Series": null,
"Collections": null,
"Fandoms": null,
"Archive Warnings": null,
"Categories": null,
"Bookmarks": null,
"Chapters": null,
"Comments": null,
"Completed": null,
"Hits": null,
"Kudos": null,
"Published": null,
"Words": null,
"Updated": null
}
|
Seokjin always thought Spring was beautiful. Flowers were blooming, animals grazed in the sun-kissed grass, and sun showers brought beautiful rainbows. What wasn’t to like? Of course, it was perfect, considering Seokjin was the Prince of Spring.
There were four kingdoms, each named after a different season, and each possessing a prince or princess to represent it. The Spring kingdom is located beside Winter and Summer. His favorite pastime is exploring the kingdom; as he loves finding the flowers he’s studied in textbooks. Earlier this week, he read about one called a “violet” and today, he decided to go look for it. The textbook didn’t contain any information about it, just the name and a picture.
He changed into clothes suitable for the journey, took a bag (which had the Spring crest on it), and shoved the book inside, along with a snack and some water. With a yell he’d be back later, he rushed down the steps and practically knocked the doors off their hinges trying to get outside.
The Castle stood in the center of the Kingdom with cobblestone paths in every direction, and over the years, he’d taken the time to explore each one. And yet, he’d never seen a violet. The only place he hadn’t dare visit was the unmarked area headed North, to the Winter Kingdom.
Before he set off, he paused in front of the path, scanning to make sure he wasn’t being watched then ducking onto the trail before that changed. After all, there was a reason he hadn’t gone this way yet...
It was beautiful, he saw animals of all kinds bounding about, flowers he hadn’t seen before, and lots of trees that held supple fruit. He stopped for a few minutes and looked ahead. Snow. Had he already made it to the Winter kingdom? He still hasn’t seen the flower, but in the distance, he could see a man coming closer. Instinctively, he waved, the man noticed and came at the border line where snow and green grass met.
“Hi, you’re the Prince of Spring, aren’t you? What’re you doing so close to the Winter kingdom?” The man asked.
“Yes, how did you know?” Seokjin tilted his head, “Who are you?”
“Just some guy. I’ve heard people speak about heir to Spring Kingdom having golden brown hair. What brings you to the edge of Winter?”
“I’m looking for a flower.” He grabbed the book from his bag, turned to the page of the violet, and showed the man.
“Violets? Those grow in Winter not Spring. There’s actually some nearby, wait a second.”
The man moved towards the woods he’d appeared from, then after a few steps, bent down to pick a few flowers. He returned to Seokjin, hand held out to show him.
“They’re so beautiful. Such a dark, rich purple color. I can see why the name is violet.” He took the flowers to examine them closer.
“Do you know the meaning in language of flowers?”
“No, the book I had only gave it’s name and the picture. By the way, what’s your name?”
“Namjoon. Yours?”
“Seokjin. So…. what do violet’s mean?”
“Hmm, I’ll tell you in the future if you still want me to?”
“Fine… Is it cold there?”
“I mean, it’s snowing… so yea.” Namjoon looked up, snowing fall around and on him.
“Can I… Can I feel some snow?” Namjoon grabbed some snow in his hands and brought it closer to Seokjin. He took a finger and touched it, it was really cold and he immediately took his fingers away. From the slight touch, he already felt extremely cold and was starting to shiver. He didn’t want Namjoon to see it, so he quickly grabbed the violets and turned away from where Namjoon was standing.
“It’s getting late, can we meet again tomorrow?”
Seokjin had just faintly heard the yes as he made his way back towards the Castle, shivering much more noticeably now. The guards near the castle noticed and ambushed him.
“My lord! You’re shivering! Did you step into the Winter Kingdom? You know it’s forbidden for you to go there! Let’s get you inside and warmed up.” They quickly led him inside and notified the King of Spring about the situation.
Seokjin was sitting in front of the fire staring at the flames dancing around. He sipped mindlessly at the mug of coffee he held.
The door to the study burst open, “Seokjin! Didn’t I tell you that it’s dangerous to go near the Winter Kingdom. Your body can’t handle cold temperatures. You could die.” It was the King.
“How come you can go?”
“What?”
“How come you can go into the Winter Kingdom?”
“You were born weak, Seokjin. I wasn’t.”
Seokjin stared into his cup of coffee.
“I’m going to have someone keep an eye on you for a while.”
Seokjin got up in a hurry, coffee sloshing onto the floor as he did so, “What? Father, I’m a grown man and a Prince of the kingdom, I don’t need to be treated as a child.”
“You may be a Prince but I’m the King, I’m treating you as a child because a grown man shouldn’t disobey orders. We had to contact the King and Prince Namjoon of Winter Kingdom because of your foolish actions.”
“Wait… Did you say Namjoon?”
“Yes. The Prince of Winter. Why are you asking?”
“It’s… It’s nothing. I’m tired, I’m going to bed. Good night, Father.”
❀❀❀
Seokjin laid awake in bed, confused by everything. Then, he noticed the vase that was on his bedside. It held the violets Namjoon had given him. He turned so that he was looking at the ceiling and let out a deep sigh, he was exhausted.
How in the hell was he supposed to meet Namjoon again? He had only talked to him for a little bit...but he had such a mysterious aura around him. Why didn’t he tell him that he was the Prince of Winter? Though Seokjin could care less if he was a royal or not, he still likes Namjoon.
He sat up in bed, rubbed his eyes and shuffled a hand through his hair. He got up and walked outside on his balcony. It was windy, but it felt nice, perfect temperature. He looked up at the moon, then looked below him. His room was looked at the back of the castle, exactly where the unmarked path to where North is… And suddenly, Seokjin didn’t feel so exhausted anymore.
He ran towards the closet in his room, it was filled with tons of new sheets. Easy access for when people come to clean his room (though he preferred cleaning it with his own hands, felt more normal). Seokjin knew this was a bad idea once he started to tie each sheet to each other and he knew it was a worse idea when he tied one end of the sheet rope to his balcony. Yet, he still started to climb down from his high balcony to the grass.
But, luckily, he did extremely tight knots (one royal lesson which actually came in use, for once) and was on the ground quickly. Spring kingdom is one of safest, so they never had guards outside, which Seokjin was thankful for at this moment. He took a deep breath and bolted towards where he went before, to where he hopes Namjoon will be.
And he found it. The snow sparkling from the moonlight, it looked beautiful. Something he didn’t expect to see was Namjoon, standing there, at the border between the kingdoms.
“Namjoon? What’re you doing here?” Seokjin suddenly felt a lot more nervous than before.
“I’m…not exactly sure. I just felt like I
needed
to be here? If that makes sense? What about you? Why are you here? I heard about what happened with you being cold, I’m sorry, I feel like it’s my fault…”
“No, Namjoon, it isn’t. I was… I was born weak, you can’t help it, I can’t help it, no one can help it.”
Namjoon looked down and shuffled his feet, “So, why are you here again? I mean, can’t you die if you get too cold.”
“I don’t know why I’m here, I just really wanted to see you again… I had things to ask you too. Is that a bad thing? And, I think I’ll be okay as long as I stay within Spring’s borders.”
“So, what do you want to ask? Shoot away.”
“Why didn’t you tell me who you were?” Seokjin looked down, “I mean, not that it matters, but still. We only talked for a little bit, but… I don’t know… I felt connected to you in a way through flowers.”
“Delicate love.” Namjoon answered staring right into his eyes.
Seokjin blinked a few times, “What?”
“That’s what violets mean… As well as affection...modesty...faith...nobility...intuition...and dignity. You said you didn’t know the meaning of them.”
Seokjin’s cheeks turned a little pink, was Namjoon implying something with his answer?
“I felt connected with you too, Seokjin, and afterwards...from such little talking, I felt affection for you…” He laughed a little, “Was that a bad time to say that?”
Seokjin blushed deeply now, thankful that it was still pretty dark out. He walked until he was right near the border, Namjoon directly in front of them, heads extremely near each other, eyes staring into each other intently, wantingly.
“My lord! Where are you?!” Seokjin looked down, He must’ve been found out, a guard probably checked his room in the middle of the night, he hadn’t thought about that.
He looked back up at Namjoon, “I guess that’s my cue to leave.”
“Guess so… Can you come back here tomorrow?”
“I’ll be here, Namjoon.”
❀❀❀
Seokjin found himself in the library being scolded again, except instead of being cold, he was very much aware of the heat that was present in the room.
“Are you even listening to me, Seokjin?!”
“Yes, Father.” Though, of course, he wasn’t, he found the woodgrains on the table he was sitting at more interesting.
“Son, I don’t want to treat you like a prisoner in your own home… But, you leave me know choice. I’m having a guard posted with you at all times. And you’re now sleeping in one of the extra rooms, no balcony.”
“Father!” His ears turned red, “I… I need to see him again!” He huffed.
“Who?”
“...No one, Father. Nevermind, I’m going to my room, my new room.”
“The man outside is your personal guard, he’ll show you the way.” He yelled out before Seokjin left.
He looked outside and saw the guard who bowed, “Hello, my lord. I’m your personal guard for who knows how long, Min Yoongi. I’ll show you to your room, follow me.”
He quietly did so, he looked outside, it was morning now. He bit his lip. How was he supposed to see Namjoon now? He was locked in his own home with someone literally watching his every room. It’s not like he could escape either, his guard seemed like he would get extremely angry if he even tried something.
He walked inside his new room, it was small, of course, and as his Father stated, just one large window. And of course Yoongi walked in. He brought one of the chairs closer to the door and sat in it. Meanwhile, Seokjin flopped on the bed and huffed.
“Why’d you go?”
Seokjin sat up, “Huh?”
“To the Winter Kingdom. Why’d you go?”
“I don’t know… There’s this guy over there and we started talking and… I don’t know, we sort of connected? He likes flowers and he knows all about them…”
Yoongi didn’t answer, he just stared off in space.
“Why’re you asking?” It’s not liked they were friends or anything.
“No reason… I just have a friend in Winter Kingdom.”
“Oh.” Seokjin flopped back down on the bed and closed his eyes, hoping that it was all a dream. That later he could see Namjoon without worries, that he wasn’t confined to a room like he did something wrong.
❀❀❀
Seokjin looked around him. He was surrounded by flowers in a meadow. He laid down. He felt serene. He felt relaxed. He hadn’t felt like this in a long time.
He closed his eyes.
Seokjin was standing in the same meadow, but now filled with snow. The sun was still out, though. But, he didn’t feel cold, he felt warmth. He felt happiness. He felt joy.
He closed his eyes.
Seokjin stood in the meadow again, now surrounded by flowers and snow. Violets were spread out through every direction, it was all he could see for miles.
Delicate love, he remembered.
He picked a few up, snow touching his hands, he felt joy.
Someone put their hands in front of his eyes, still holding the flowers, he touched the hands with his own.
“Guess who?” The owner of the hands asked.
“Hmm? Who could it be? I have no idea.”
The voice behind him laughed, “It’s me Namjoon.” Namjoon turned around facing Seokjin. Eyes burning into each others, Namjoon placed a hand on Seokjin’s cheek.
They inched closer.
They were centimeters away from touching.
❀❀❀
Seokjin woke up in bed, he looks around him, he doesn’t know where he is and the dream he just had… He doesn’t understand.
Then it hit him.
He had snuck out to see Namjoon and his Father had punished him for it by keeping him locked up in a room, a guard watching his every move.
His head turned to look outside the window, eyes blurry from tiredness. He saw the moon, he saw the stars, he saw leaves moving from the wind.
He bolted straight up, eyes wide. He has to meet Namjoon! Well, he was supposed to meet him earlier… But I guess late at night is as good as any.
Yoongi jumped awake at the sudden movement, “What’s going on?!”
“Yoongi, I’m sorry, I have to go. I have to go see Namjoon. I have to!”
Yoongi held him back from opening the door, “Wait just a second… Namjoon? As in Prince of Winter Namjoon?”
“That’s the one, now let me go!.” He tried to go under Yoongi’s hand, but Yoongi - being a trained and skilled guardsman - didn’t let him pass.
“That’s my friend from Winter Kingdom I told you about. Why do you need to see him?”
Seokjin retreated his hands, he looked at the floor, his cheeks burning, he mumbled his answer.
“What?” Yoongi asked.
“I think I’m in love with Namjoon.” He repeated with certainty, looking into Yoongi’s eyes.
Yoongi looked down, “I… I work for your Father. But, I believe in love, so I’m gonna pretend you escaped, okay? Just be quick…”
Seokjin’s eyes widened, he hugged Yoongi, he couldn’t help it. He was just so happy. Then he ran out into the hallway, down the steps, and outside the castle gates, thankful again for the lack of guards at night.
He rushed towards Winter Kingdom, quickly getting there.
He waited. He sat down. He got up. He walked right. He walked left. He brushed his hand through his hair. Namjoon had said he’d be there, but where was he? It had been a total of ten minutes since he arrived.
He looked at the woods, they were covered in snow and snow was falling lightly around the area as well.
Then he ran.
He ran into the wood, he could already feel the cold seeping into him, but he could care less.
All he wanted right now was to see Namjoon.
He needed to see him.
His shoes became heavy getting soggy from the snow, his feet felt frozen but he kept going.
His face felt frozen, he wanted to stop, he want to roll up in a ball, but he kept going thinking only about Namjoon.
Seokjin was sure his skin was turning colors by now, his breath showed heavily in front of him as he ran.
Though he missed a root of a tree and tripped. He fell into snow, face first. His face felt frozen, he felt frozen, but he needed to survive for a little more, he needed to see Namjoon… He needed to tell him.
He turned over so he was looking up, the moon was bright today as well.
Then he heard footsteps, so he called out, “Namjoon!”
The footsteps sped up, “Seokjin?! What’re you doing here?!” Namjoon kneeled down beside Seokjin.
“Namjoon…” His breath felt heavy, he felt tired, he wanted to close his eyes… But Namjoon had finally come.
“What? S-Seokjin? Why did you come?” Seokjin saw that he was crying.
“I… I wanted to see you again. I needed to, Namjoon.”
Namjoon looked intensely into Seokjin’s eyes, “Why? I said I would come, didn’t I?”
“This couldn’t wait... “
Seokjin lifted one of his hand and touched Namjoon on his cheek, Namjoon inched closer, their faces just a breath apart.
Cold lips met warm. They fit each other, gently and slowly they kissed, sharing their feelings with each other. Namjoon could feel that Seokjin’s breath had shallowed so he broke away.
“I… I love you, Namjoon.”
Namjoon hugged Seokjin, “I love you too, S-Seokjin.”
Namjoon could feel that he wasn’t breathing anymore. His tears came out more forceful as he hugged the cold body as snow fell around them.
|
10563255
|
Meerkat Cafe
|
{
"Archive Warning": "No Archive Warnings Apply",
"Category": "M/M",
"Characters": "Lee Jooheon, Lee Minhyuk (Monsta X), Chae Hyungwon, Shin Hoseok | Wonho, Son Hyunwoo | Shownu, Lim Changkyun | I.M, Yoo Kihyun",
"Fandom": "Monsta X (Band)",
"Language": "English",
"Rating": "General Audiences",
"author": "by Kamekatze",
"chapters": "1/1",
"completed": "",
"published": "2017-04-07T00:00:00",
"words": "2,101",
"Additional Tags": "Alternate Universe - Coffee Shops & Cafés, Alternate Universe - College/University, Side ChangKi, Fluff and Crack",
"Relationship": null,
"Character": null,
"Relationships": "Lee Jooheon/Lee Minhyuk, Lim Changkyun | I.M/Yoo Kihyun",
"Series": "Honeypup's mildly concerning shenanigans",
"Collections": null,
"Fandoms": null,
"Archive Warnings": null,
"Categories": null,
"Bookmarks": null,
"Chapters": null,
"Comments": null,
"Completed": null,
"Hits": null,
"Kudos": null,
"Published": null,
"Words": null,
"Updated": null
}
|
"Minhyuk, I will not let you drag me to a meerkat cafe for date night."
"But see, that's where you're wrong!"
Minhyuk quickened his walk, troubling Jooheon who failed to keep up. The younger struggled under the weight of a dozen shopping bags his boyfriend had lovingly bestowed upon him.
"Hyung!", he whined. "Remember how date night is all about being fancy? I don't see how having some weird animals chewing on our dress shoes is fit for that kinda thing!"
Minhyuk stopped in his tracks and turned to face his companion.
He spoke in a singsong, his voice dripping with the loveliest sarcasm. "Well, my dearest Honey," - a pause for the dramatic effect - "should've thought about that before you took me out to McDonalds last week. I could literally pick any horrible, cheap, disgusting place to go for dinner, and wouldn't even have to feel bad. Because you, my friend, officially took the crown for 'worst boyfriend on worst dinner date'."
Jooheon put down the bags and huffed, wiping sweat off his forehead with his sweater sleeve. He knitted his brows together and frowned, but went on to hurry after the long-legged model, who once again strut forward mercilessly.
"Min-hyung, you know I forgot my wallet that day! Fast food is better than no food!"
Families with small children threw them concerned glances as they scurried along, and Minhyuk made venomously sweet remarks over his shoulder, addressing his boyfriend the way he had seen Shownu handle rebellious kindergarteners.
"I don't see anything wrong with fast food, Honey. Well, except for when I wake up to see headlines, announcing the fashion world thinks I'm broke and giving up on my career, as I've turned to eating 3$ McD' menus. And maybe, Honey, maybe, a sticky table and soggy fries just don't cut it for a six months anniversary."
He halted in front of a ridiculously sparkly display window, and gave the panting boy behind him a sigh.
Jooheon brushed some strands of chocolate hair out of his eyes, lifting the bags with every move (enough exercise for this year).
"I admit it. That was really kinda shitty. But I apologized that same night, and I really thought, ya know, it's about us being together and not about fancy French desserts I can't pronounce. I'm sorry, sincerely. Please don't hate me."
After some months of dating and even years of friendship, he know how to push the older's buttons. He pouted, opened his sharp eyes wide, and gave his best 'hurt puppy' look. To his triumph, Minhyuk's glare softened. His eyes crinkled with his disgustingly lovesick smile, but he quickly regained his conscience. Shaking his head, he took some of the bags from Jooheon's arms.
"Alright, thou shalt be forgiven", he reluctantly conceded. "But you still owe me one. Believe me, you got a storm coming."
The model set out for their destination again, and, focused on the bright bubble tea stand, missed how the younger's facade fell into a juvenile grin. The brunette linked their arms and rested his head on his boyfriend's shoulder, trying hard to adapt to the man's long strides.
"But Hyung, how is a meerkat cafe any better than McDonalds? You know I don't... enjoy having wild animals near my food", he remarked.
He saw the shit-eating smile growing on the other's face.
"Oh, Honey, you don't just dislike them. You are terrified", Minhyuk affirmed. He leaned down to whisper near Jooheon's ear. "And you should be."
"Jooheon, why is your phone blowing up with Minhyuk sending pictures?" Hyungwon voiced his mild concern.
"Sweet, nudes!" Broad-shouldered blonde Hoseok found his cue to jump on their desk and swiftly and literally slide into the conversation.
"They aren't nudes", Jooheon groaned, and let his head lull forward onto the doodle-clad desk with a thump.
From the corners of his eye, the devastated maknae saw their 'responsible oldest' Hoseok make grabby hands towards the ever-beeping phone. Without lifting his head the youngest picked up the sad cracked-screened device and handed it off to Hyungwon. No one could know what Hoseok'd be up to once he had his mind set on nudes.
While the tallest of the trio browsed Jooheon's DMs with the focusedly furrowed brows of a police investigator on the job, the resident muscle guy tried to pick up a conversation with the maknae, who now seemed to quite enjoy squashing his face on his desk. "Jooheon, before I forget, Kihyun told Changkyun to tell me to tell you he won't be in your music theory seminar this semester." The youngest gave the wooden surface a confused frown, and slowly sat up straight with all the might of a broken man.
"Why'd Kihyun quit the class? He loved it, and the teacher loved him?"
Hoseok, still draped on the table like on of those French girls, inspected his nails ready to spill the gossip (Hoseok had been compared to a teenage girl on multiple occasion, and the simile more than ever seemed accurate).
"Well, let me tell you." He dragged out every syllable, as to create suspense. Hyungwon huffed in annoyance without lifting his eyes once.
Hoseok leaned over the table and lowered his voice, excited to let only the visibly less than disinterested Jooheon in on the big tea. "Apparently, he quit the seminar to... take cooking classes." A dramatic pause. His voice barely a whisper. "With Changkyun."
"Wow."
Jooheon wasn't shocked, but understandably felt betrayed. But the oldest silenced him with one gesture of a hand, and dropped the figurative bomb.
"Couple cooking classes."
"Well, that's disgusting."
At this point, Hyungwon decided to stir the conversation back to the pressing topic at hand.
"Jooheon, I read Minhyuk and your chat, and I really cannot figure out the reason for his sending you 124 pictures of meerkats in various costumes?"
"Ooooh, that thing!", Hoseok exclaimed in recognition. "Remember how it was their six moths anniversary last week?"
Hyungwon's nod lead the eldest to lean to the tallest instead, leaving the whining maknae unattended. "Well", he whispered again. "It's a revenge thing. Jooheon took him to McDonalds for dinner".
The desk was once again welcomingly met with Jooheon's forehead.
Kihyun and Changkyun studied Minhyuk with growing interest, like a mum and daughter watching screaming apes or head butting giraffes in the zoo.
Though in the middle of a lyrical theory lecture, the tall redhead was furiously typing away on his phone under his desk, and had been at it for roughly half an hour. Apart from the obviously biased Jooheon, no one seemed to understand Minhyuk's decision to go to university with them. Couldn't he quit sleeping in class and complaining about cafeteria food, and go be a famous model elsewhere?
Still, some professors apparently did believe in Minhyuk's creative abilities. The old lady with the unnervingly screechy voice appeared heartbroken at her favorite student's disinterest, and chose to shoot the nearby sat ChangKi disappointed evil glares.
Kihyun never had been one to get on a teachers bad side, and so he subtlety went on to full-forcedly kick Minhyuk's shin.
The model yelped in pain, nearly dropping his phone while simultaneously gripping his hurting limb and turning to give the evil tiny Kihyun a piece of mind. "What the fuck, dude?", he scream-whispered.
Kihyun just silently raised one eyebrow as Changkyun snickered shamelessly. Not wanting to disturb the lecture and incur the professor's wrath again, the model student lowered his voice. "No, what the fuck, YOU! What the hell are you up to on your phone? Miss JL already hates us enough, you don't need to be an ass in class!"
Changkyun, again, snickered into his hoodie.
Kihyun pressed on his temple, realizing his straight A ambitions blowing the situation out of proportion. He should let his friends live, regardless of their effect on his grades. He had to remind himself once in a while.
Minhyuk gave a guilty, crooked smile. Unable to reach Kihyun's shoulder, he settled on awkwardly petting the younger's beanie instead. "I'm sorry Ki. I just... really need to do this."
"Well, what is it?", Kihyun inquired, suddenly concerned, his mum instincts coming to show.
The older just gestured vaguely and faced the front of the lecture hall, or at least pretended to do so.
Ever silent Changkyun chose that moment to mutter his first words of the day. "No, seriously Hyung, what's up? You didn't look this focused and emotionally constipated since we watched the last episode of Goblin."
As Kihyun hummed in furious agreement, Minhyuk clicked his tongue, and finally spoke up to answer.
"I'm on a quest to get Jooheon to agree to my date plan. So logically, the only way to do so is to send him hundreds of pictures of meerkats."
Kihyun sighed, again rubbing his temple. "Do you believe this is an appropriate measure to be taken?"
A villainous laugh. "But most certainly, dear."
"I like your shoes".
"Alright."
"You'll have to take them off. The raccoon might chew on them."
A deep sigh. "Alright".
It had come to this.
Jooheon and Minhyuk, dressed to the nines, were about to be stripped of their fanciness, and devoured by small, fluffy, evil creatures (coincidentally, Kihyun had been described that way before).
That was what Jooheon believed, anyways.
Obviously, the brunette hadn't warmed up to the whole ordeal yet, even after acknowledging the elder's countless and various attempts of convincing the younger.
As they collected their brightly colored crocs, Minhyuk cornered his boyfriend in the quiet hallway.
"Don't think I can't see your frown, Jooie."
Jooheon smiled guiltily. He leaned back against a wall, Minhyuk towering above him.
Joo's words were soft, ashamed of his feeling being this obvious, and his model boyfriend being not only unrealistically handsome, but everything but oblivious. He blushed.
"I just... I can't believe you're making me do this out of pure spite, and I'm actually going along with it."
Minhyuk sighed, and leaned in closer to carefully stroke his boyfriend's hair.
"My Honey. You know, I partially, or mostly, picked this date spot to scare the living crap out of you, but... remember what you said about our McDonalds anniversary?"
If possible, Jooheon's guilty frown was accompanied by an even darker blush.
"That I can't speak French for shit?"
He didn't keep a list of all of his favorite things about Minhyuk, but the man's high-pitched hollering laugh was pretty high up there. A laughing Minhyuk exuded an aura of carefreeness and ease, which Jooheon has desperately needed countless times. Minhyuk helped him keep at things, and made him do stupid and reckless things with the wave of a hand. Minhyuk always managed to get him out and above his comfort zone.
Minhyuk laughed his brightest laugh.
"That I knew before. No, what you said was that the whole date night thingy is not just supposed to be about us wining and dining. And you're right. We shouldn't always want to go to renowned and pricey restaurants. We should just go out and enjoy our time together."
He smiled his eye-crinkling, sunny grin, and Jooheon couldn't hide the fond smile growing on his face.
Minhyuk stepped back, and took ahold of the younger's hand.
"So, what do you say? Shall we go visit this crazy cute cafe I've been wanting to visit for weeks, and have the best time we could possible have?" He stood up straight, pulling Jooheon up with him.
"Ready to face the army of dangerously cute fluffies awaiting us?"
They locked eyes for a second, until Jooheon gave their clasped hands an affirmative squeeze.
"Let's go."
"Let's GO!"
[JuHoney]: hyungs . i can't live with u anymore
[Mumster]: Why?, what is it?
[i am]: y does no1 talk 2 me
[JuHoney]: there isn't enough space in our house
[JuHoney has sent 3 images]
[JuHoney]: min-hyung and i need to adopt about 20 fluffy children asap
[1hoe]: aaaAAAAAAAW
[JuHoney has sent 3 images]
[MINPUPPY(*⁰▿⁰*)]: see? It's cute. i won
[i am]: ^ i ₩
[hyung₩] don't come for my brand.
[hyung₩] also, Jooheon. You're suspiciously enthusiastic for someone who feared for his life some hours ago.
[i am]: yea, did something happen?
[1hoe]: yea, did something *wiggles eyebrows* happen?
[Mumster]: I'm sure they just had some cake and cuddled small animals.
[hyung₩] : kinky.
[i am]: kinky !
[1hoe]: kINKYYY
[Mumster]: oh my god.
[JuHoney]: nO? the meerkats didn't try to kill me? they were cute? it was cute?
[MINPUPPY(*⁰▿⁰*)]: yup we fucked
[Mumster]: OH MY GOD.
[Son Hyun Woo Shownu]: cute date !
[MINPUPPY(*⁰▿⁰*)] THANK you, dad
[JuHoney]: oh my god.
[1hoe]: K I N K Y
|
10577931
|
Bae-watch
|
{
"Archive Warning": "No Archive Warnings Apply",
"Category": "F/M",
"Characters": "James Potter, Lily Evans Potter, Sirius Black, Remus Lupin, Marlene McKinnon, Severus Snape",
"Fandom": "Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling",
"Language": "English",
"Rating": "General Audiences",
"author": "by wotcherpotter",
"chapters": "1/1",
"completed": "",
"published": "2017-04-09T00:00:00",
"words": "2,335",
"Additional Tags": "Jily Challenge April, Alternate Universe, Alternate Universe - Muggle, One Shot",
"Relationship": "James Potter/Lily Evans Potter",
"Character": null,
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"Collections": null,
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"Archive Warnings": null,
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"Words": null,
"Updated": null
}
|
Lily joined her family at the table for breakfast on the first Sunday of her summer break. She had always been the last to rise, a trait that had only become more prominent the older she grew. The sun shone through the window and danced on the fiery red of her hair, warming her shoulders. Two slices of toast were placed on the table in front of her mother, and Lily eagerly thanked her whilst she spread several layers of jam on each. Her sister, Petunia, looked at her across the table with disdain. Lily poked her tongue in retaliation. She caught her eye with her father over the top of the paper, and could just make out the hint of a smile from the crinkles by his eyes.
Lily picked up the entertainment section of the paper that her father had left for her on the table. She was flicking through the pages aimlessly, when a small advert in the corner of one of the pages caught her eye.
Queen
were scheduled to perform at a venue closeby towards the end of the summer. Lily nearly fell out of her seat in excitement. She ran to the kitchen where the phone was on the hook, and dialled the number of her best friend. Lily tapped her foot impatiently, and curled the cord around her finger whilst she waited. After a few rings, someone at the other end finally picked up.
“McKinnon residence, this is Michael,” a deep voice answered.
“Hi Mike, it’s Lily. Is Marlene awake yet? Actually, I doubt she is but this is
extremely
important, can you go get her, pleeeeeeease?” Lily tried her sweetest, most persuasive voice.
She needn’t have bothered, as Mike would take any opportunity to annoy his older sister. He didn’t say a word to Lily, but she could here the yelling as he jumped on her in bed. There was a kerfuffle when someone picked up the receiver, and then Marlene’s voice was finally at the other end of the line.
“This better be good.”
“My dearest friend, I would never wish such ill fortune on you if it wasn’t of paramount importance,” Lily teased.
“Oh, spit it out. I’m hungry now that I’ve risen from my beauty sleep, and I can smell bacon in the kitchen.”
“Queen is coming to Cokeworth!” Lily squealed.
“Are you pulling my leg?” Marlene said grumpily.
“I wouldn’t dream of it when it comes to Queen, Marls. What do you take me for? Some kind of ignoramus?” Lily giggled down the end of the receiver.
“You are far too chirpy for this ungodly hour.”
“It’s past ten,” Lily deadpanned.
“Ha ha. So how are we going to get tickets?” Marlene questioned.
“Well, I got offered that job at the pool over the summer. Have you heard anything from the library yet?” Lily bit into her second piece of toast as she asked, and crumbs littered the top of er pyjama shirt.
“Nothing yet. Though I think that has something to do with the fact that Mrs Pince just has it our for me. I swear the old bat detests anything that’s not a book,” Marlene complained.
Lily could practically hear the sound of Marlene’s eyes rolling through the receiver. Before she could respond, her sister appeared in the doorway of the kitchen, signalling to Lily that she wanted to use the phone as well. Lily put her hand over the receiver and looked at Petunia with irritance.
“What is it, Tuney?” Lily moaned.
“I’m expecting a call from Vernon any minute, I need you to get off the phone. Now,” she said with finality.
“Why should I? Your phone calls aren’t any more important than mine.”
“Grow up Lily, just give me the-”
“No, I’m not finished talking to-’
“Girls!” A new voice shouted.
It was their mother, and an unnaturally stern look painted her features. Silence reigned throughout the kitchen, as their bickering had ceased. Lily instantly felt guilty for being ridiculous. She knew money was tight at the moment for her parents, and she usually did everything she could to keep that stress as low as possibly. There was just something about her sister that got under her skin.
“I’ve got to go Marls. Meet me at the pool later for my first shift.” Lily said, hanging the phone back on the hook on the wall.
She avoided making eye contact with her sister as she walked out of the kitchen, as she didn’t think she could bear the smugness that had inevitably crossed her bony face. She trudged back upstairs to her bedroom to get ready for the day. She reminded herself that she was getting out of the house and away from her sister,
and
she was being paid for it, and didn’t feel so bad at all.
****
When Lily arrived at the pool later that day, there were people everywhere. She couldn’t say she too surprised - this summer was expected to be the hottest on record - but it was slightly overwhelming when your first day working as a lifeguard was for a pool with hundreds of people. She tried to put her nerves away with the rest of the things in her locker. She had managed to bring her heart rate back down to a normal pace, and started to walk out the building to the pool.
“Alright, Evans?” A familiar voice called out to her.
She froze. She knew exactly who that voice belonged to, and up until very recently the owner had been the bane of her existence. Some higher being must really hate her, because now the sound of that voice was enough to turn her legs to jelly. She could picture him now; his golden skin contrasting with the jet black mess of his hair, a gleeful grin ever-present on his face. No doubt the rest of the Marauders as they called themselves were in tow, and Lily was all alone with no one to keep her upright should she faint. She of course, couldn’t admit defeat and let him
know
that she had a soft spot for him, she didn’t want to look like a fool after all these years of loathing him. She realised too late that several minutes had passed without her saying anything, standing frozen in the middle of the entryway to the pool like a deer in the headlights.
“Er - Are you actually alright, Lily? You seem a bit pale,” James said, concerned lacing his tone.
“Haven’t you noticed that before? Maybe you need some new glasses, Potter,” she snipped, walking off to the patrol tower.
“What did you say this time, Prongs?” She heard someone say, Remus, if she had to guess.
She blocked the rest of the conversation out, as she was trying to calm her nerves again. So, not only was she now dealing with an overfilled pool on her first day, she now had to overcome the distraction that was James Potter. And what a distraction he had recently proven to be.
Lily perched herself atop the lifeguard tower, doing her best to oversee the visitors to the pool. Hers had a mind of their own, and kept drifting back to the area where James and co. had positioned themselves. She watched as he took his shirt off, and nearly fell the couple of metres off the tower. She had never really noticed before, but apparently being captain of their school’s football team had a couple of perks (other than everyone in the school wanting to be your best mate). Unfortunately, she was caught in the act by the only other person she loathed more than Potter: Severus Snape.
She couldn't even understand what he was doing there at the pool; he hated the sun, people and swimming. Surely the local pool during summer was his own personal hell. She could see his snarl from across the pool, as he followed the path of her eyes to where she’d just been staring. She watched as he made his way over to her, and rolled her eyes. She knew exactly what was coming. Where was her best friend to save her from all these dastardly men?
“Whatever happened to ‘Potter is an arrogant toerag I want nothing to do with?” She heard him yell from the bottom of the tower.
“Leave me alone, Sev,” she sighed.
“You’re practically salivating watching him take his shirt off, just like every other girl in our year,” he snarled.
She had had enough. She climbed down, fuming as she went. He was slightly taller than her, and when she was on the ground she had to look up at his waxy skin to catch his eye.
“I told you to leave me alone. I don't want anything to do with you anymore, Sev. You made your choice; I can't be friends with someone like you anymore.” She was stern, not showing a trace of weakness.
“What's going on over here then, Snivelly?” a new voice sounded from behind her.
Lily felt her heart jump into her throat. James had walked up beside her whilst she was preoccupied. Any coherent thought and had flown the window, and all she was worried about was whether or not she had remembered to brush her hair. That was until she remembered the scenario in which he had entered, and her temper flared.
“I don't need you fighting my battles, Potter,” she said, nostrils flaring.
She saw Severus roll his eyes.
“You know me, Evans, I’ll take any excuse to to knock Snivelly down a few pegs,” James said.
He was smiling, but it didn’t reach his eyes in the way that made her melt. It was more of a snarl, and it left a bitter taste in her mouth. She turned back to Snape, her arms folded.
“In case you haven’t noticed, I’m trying to work. Both of you, leave me alone
now
.”
She climbed back up the tower, thus ending the conversation. She was suddenly hyper-aware of the close proximity between her butt on the ladder and James’s head. A blush fanned across her cheeks, and she was thankful neither of them could see her face.
Back up in the safety of her tower of solitude, she watched over the pool. Sev eventually left the pool, relieving her of at least some of the stress of the day. For a brief period, there were no incidents; that was until, James decided to make use of the pools facilities. She watched from the tower, as he walked around to the diving board. He climbed, surpassing the 3ft board; he kept climbing, past the 6t board; until he eventually reached the board 9ft above the pool. She followed his eyes to where his friends were sitting; they were all egging him on, thumbs up and cheering. Lily rolled her eyes. All four of them were idiots.
Her head snapped back when she heard the creak of the board bounce. It didn’t sound very sturdy at all, and all the muscles in Lily’s body tensed as she watched him. He lost his footing slightly on the last bounce, and fell into the water with a loud splash. Lily dove into the water in an instant. She kicked as fast as she could, her heart racing.
How could be be so STUPID
, she thought angrily. A stream of bubbles followed her to where James was still sinking to the bottom. She lugged him up to the top, and they both spluttered and gasped for air.
“Alright, Evans?” James asked.
His ever-present grin was plastered across his face, though Lily thought she saw a pinkish tinge to his cheeks. It was probably the only time in her life she had seen his hair flat, though he wasted no time in messing it up again.
“What were you trying to do, you giant idiot!” Lily shrieked in reply.
“It’s not
my
fault the diving board is a hundred years old!” He remarked, incredulously.
“It doesn’t take a genius to think twice before using it then, does it James?” She rebutted.
“Lucky I have you here to save me from being a bellend then,” he said, softly this time.
“How am I supposed to always save you from being a bellend, James? That’s a 24 hour job and when would I get time to sleep?”
“You and Remus can take it in turns, I expect.”
“You drive me mental, you know that right?” She said, exasperated.
“I’d have to be a bellend not to,” he said, smirking.
She splashed water in his face, taking him by surprise. His mouth gaped in shock, and she laughed with her whole body. He tackled her, wrapping his arms around her body so that she couldn’t get away. A shiver ran through her body, and her cheeks began to heat up again. He loosened his grip just enough so that she could turn to face him. A similar tinge of pink coloured his own cheeks, and it made her feel like jelly. He leant in, and her breath hitched in her throat. His lips touched hers ever so softly, and she could feel the warmth of his breath.
“Oi James, quit snogging and get back here we’ve got hot chips!” She heard Sirius’s voice yell.
She smiled against his mouth, and noticed a definite red spreading across James’s cheeks. He unfurled one of his arms around her, presumably to toss Sirius the finger as she heard him whoop with laughter and walk away. He kissed her again and she wrapped her arms around his neck, twirling her fingers in the curls at the nape of his neck.
“Think I can persuade you to watch over me?” James asked.
Lily pulled back, pursing her lips in feigned deliberation.
“You know my eyesight is shocking, so I can’t actually see whatever face you’re pulling. Your ethereal beauty is lost on me without my glasses,” he sighed.
“Shut up, Potter, or I’ll change my mind.”
|
10522986
|
Letters Home
|
{
"Archive Warning": "Major Character Death",
"Category": "Other",
"Characters": "Skaaiat Awer, Awn Elming",
"Fandom": "Imperial Radch Series - Ann Leckie",
"Language": "English",
"Rating": "Teen And Up Audiences",
"author": "by venndaai",
"chapters": "1/1",
"completed": "",
"published": "2017-04-17T00:00:00",
"words": "1,601",
"Additional Tags": "Illustrated, Pining, R2SID Exchange",
"Relationship": "Skaaiat Awer/Awn Elming",
"Character": null,
"Relationships": null,
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|
Skaaiat always took too long composing her messages home. It ought to have come easy, after years of practice, and certainly in person glibness was easy around family, but there was something about composing a summary of the last two months that made her struggle, starting recordings and then deleting them multiple times, trying to find the right balance between sincerity, light-heartedness and irony. “Dear Maman, I do hope this finds you well-” “Honored mother, I’m sure you expect me to complain about the dreariness of this uncivilized planet, so far from the loving embraces of my family, and it would be churlish of me to disappoint you-” “Maman, I am doing well, though I do miss you. I know I’ve always disappointed you, though you’ve always been too kind to say so, and I regret to say I’m still not properly applying myself, though I have made some connections during this annexation, and perhaps that will be enough to satisfy Auntie. Also, I’ve-”She stopped, sat silently for a long moment, and then said, “Delete that one too, Ship.”“Yes, Lieutenant,” Justice of Entes murmured in her ear.Skaaiat continued staring into space. “I’ve met someone,” she said, quietly, and then, in a normal tone, “Amaat damn it.” Justice of Entes didn’t comment, but summoned Seven Issa Three in with tea. Which they were running low on, and there was no counting on resupplies any time soon. Skaaiat growled in frustration. Three didn’t react. She was used to her lieutenant’s mannerisms by now.
Skaaiat and her soldiers were quartered in a large riverfront apartment building that had belonged to a wealthy business owner before the annexation, and which now belonged to a different business owner who had graciously invited them to live there, rent-free of course. The building was located right on the waterfront, though most of this town was; it was the only town of any size between Ors and Could Ves.It was very different from the set-up in Ors, which was something Skaaiat had been thinking about a great deal recently.Their duties here were fairly light, and despite the heat and bugs Skaaiat’s soldiers seemed to enjoy being on a planet, and didn’t much grumble, at least not where she could hear. Skaaiat was glad about that. She was personally very much enjoying Shis’urna.It was nice, she thought, that her decade had been deployed only recently, after the Annexation had been declared ended. She’d been in one Annexation before, and hadn’t enjoyed it.In this county, there was not much work to be done except reviewing tax reports. Skaaiat was lazy. She knew it, her mother knew it, her soldiers probably knew it too. Who cared? She might as well appreciate this pleasantly empty time while she could.Did Awn know it, though?
“Dear mother, I received your message with the greatest gratitude and affection. I am terribly glad to hear you are all doing well. Tell Issaid I enjoyed her dissertation, the one-twentieth of it I could understand, and it’s far past time she put that brain to use and embarrassed us all with her genius. Tell Marat that affair is truly scandalous and I’m very proud of her.I remain well. Despite the heat, and the bugs, and the lack of civilized company, yes, even so, Mother. The company isn’t entirely uncivilized, actually. The sector next to mine is administered by a Justice of Toren lieutenant who is quite delightful. I think, um, I h- sorry, bit of a cough, I am positive you would just love her. Very charmingly idealistic, despite my best efforts to corrupt her with my terrible cynicism. Good work ethic, too. Absolutely nothing like me.Maybe you’ll get to meet her one day. Who knows! Crazier things have happened. We’ll see how the coins fall.” The Awer estate was very, very far from Shis'Urna. A message sent from Justice of Entes would travel via communication buoys networked by provincial palaces. It might reach Skaaiat's mother sooner, if she were off planet visiting a palace, in the midst of one of her vicious political skirmishes. She probably would have told Skaaiat in her last message if she'd had plans to do so, but she might not have. There was a great deal you learned to let go unspoken, when you were an Awer. Or at least, not spoken over long distance communications. Not spoken anywhere an AI could hear.Leaving things unspoken became a habit. A bad one, Skaaiat was beginning to think. She had no idea how to break it. No idea how to begin unwinding the tangle of what was allowed, what was expected, what was amusing, and what was- just her.Her body could express itself perfectly, in the language of skin on skin. Bare hands and sweat-soaked hair and the need to be closer. Closer. Her body knew but Skaaiat laid there afterwards looking at the afternooon light in Awn's eyes, unable to say anything that meant anything. “Stop trying to torture me with vivid descriptions of high table at home, Mother. I’ll have you know there’s a number of extremely acceptable restaurants in this part of Shis’Urna. Perhaps not Radchaai enough for you, but still, delicious.Oh, stop making that face. I know you are. And I know you’re not really such a snob. It’s just a joke, all right?I know. I’m not as funny as I think I am.”
Sweat and the buzz of insects and the mingled smell of swamp and flowers. In Skaaiat's dreams she was on the family estate, listening to the sound of fountains and wandering through the rose gardens. She thought maybe she was looking for someone, but the dreams dissipated upon waking. “Marat, I am not sure just what you are implying, but fine, I’ll send you a picture of her if it’ll stop your pathetic attempts at innuendo. Pff. Not like you’ve ever bothered to let me know what your paramour of the month looks like. Not that I’d be interested in knowing.Please, please, whatever overblown romantic notions are going through that little head of yours right now, do not share them with Mother or I will destroy forever any chance of you getting any clients or patrons from the military. They won’t even fuck you when I’m done so just be a dear sister and don’t.” Skaaiat could be scandalous, she could be rude, she could be brutally honest masked with charm, and yes, she was sure sometimes she managed sincerity, even if it often seemed to slip unnoticed among the charm and rudeness, even when she'd meant to be earnest. But for the first time she had words caught in her throat, simply because she couldn't seem to come up with a good way to say them. There was time, she told herself, trying to calm herself down. She'd work it out. She'd find the words that let Awn know she wanted more than a transitory friendship of convenience, and then there wouldn't be any talk of clientage for another decade at least, depending on how their military careers went; and then- if she still had these feelings, then, and if Awn was willing to entertain them, there might be, oh, so much time, to work on getting the wording perfectly right. “I miss you all. We’ll have to catch up, next time I’m home. I’ll have some funny stories to entertain the children with, I’m sure.Justice of Toren’s been recalled to Valskaay for some reason, which means I’ve been promoted! I’m now responsible for the city of Ors, instead of kilometers of boring farmland. Life will be more exciting here. Though I’ll miss my acquaintances on Justice of Toren a little. Still, the universe moves on. It’s all the will of Amaat.Please tell Marat to stop wasting message allowance sending me silly unnecessary letters. I can talk to her in person in a year or so.”
When I was young you taught me never to show my hand. To be patient, to wait, wait, wait. To be calm and charming and personable. Because change will come, the House is pushing for it, but if you don’t watch your tongue you can ruin decades of careful work in a moment.
I believed you.
It was convenient for me to believe you.
Not something she could even put in a deleted recording, this. Something she could only compose in her head, while meditating in the evening, listening to the lakewater hitting the piers. Keeping calm. Not thinking of Justice of Toren on its way to Valskaay.
Have you ever wanted to make yourself better for someone?
“Hello, Mother. Sorry for the silence.I’m sure by now you’ve heard of Justice of Toren’s disappearance. You might even have known before I did. The time lapses in information travel can be cruel.I’m sorry Marat’s fantasies were dashed.Tell her mine were as well.Oh, I’m sorry, that sounded like a play for pity, didn’t it? I-I don’t really know what to say. For the first time in a while.Harvest time has come in Ors, and in Culd Vess, where Eight Issa is policing now. The citizens under my care are all busy taking in the crops before we’re hit by the winter rains, and traveling to larger towns to sell them. There’s been some theft but not much. Nothing to occupy the time. I sit indoors speaking with the High Priest a lot. She doesn’t like me, but that’s all right.I wonder how long I’ll remain here.”
|
10504857
|
Mary Did You See Her
|
{
"Archive Warning": "Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings",
"Category": null,
"Characters": null,
"Fandom": "Original Work",
"Language": "English",
"Rating": "Teen And Up Audiences",
"author": "by orphan_account",
"chapters": "1/1",
"completed": "",
"published": "2017-03-31T00:00:00",
"words": "335",
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|
Mary, did you see herShe was walking all aloneSomething’s not rightSeeing loved ones never knowBut one life or another I will find her so Tell me MaryWhat’s going onMary do you hear meI could really use a friendI’ve been hanging On ninth life’s threadOne day I will see her Walking all alone This is my last chance Mary, what’s going onTell me MaryDo you see her tooAm I sane now Or should I end it soonMaybe it's better this way That she doesn't know She could live nowMary do you think so tooMary do you love meWe have been friends Then you must believe me I see her every dayYou can’t think I’m crazy Because I’m all alone Mary you’ve got to help me I want to go homeI’m not crazyYou can’t do that You’re my last chance And my only friend If you make that phone call All my work will be goneMary please don’tI won’t live that longThis will hurt me In my tenth lifeI will miss you But it’s only right If im gone they can’t catch meMy mission can progressIt’s okay My love, it’s all a messMary you see me Lying on our floor Blood stains Even on the doorMary it’s okayThat you think I’m deadBut in realityIt is only saidMary you miss me I can see you nowCryingThe girl, your friend and palI’ll show you that i was rightNot just insaneMary please This isn’t a gameMary you feel bad You regret ignoring meI hear that You can’t even seeEven though impossible We’ll be friends In another life Beyond your endsMary I told youYou thought that i was wrongOne dayYou will find the chance was longSome day sisterYou will see her too Some day Very soon
|
10500738
|
Dance the Warrior
|
{
"Archive Warning": "Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings",
"Category": "F/F",
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"Fandom": "Buffy the Vampire Slayer",
"Language": "English",
"Rating": "Mature",
"author": "by samescenes",
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"published": "2017-03-30T00:00:00",
"words": "1,630",
"Additional Tags": "Established Relationship, Fluff and Humor, Post-Series, imagine a universe where everyone is older and wiser and a bit more sexually free",
"Relationship": "Faith Lehane/Buffy Summers",
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|
There must be fifteen demons; maybe twenty. They rise out of the bottom of a lake, which is at the bottom of a cave, which is really not a great place for some kind of tactical ambush, but needs must. Soundless, they spread out in formation: groups of three, like Giles said they would. It’s dark, and Buffy and Faith put out the lamp ten minutes ago so they could lie in wait. Buffy guesses it’s a good thing their eyes glow in the dark, like those demon fishes on the Discovery Channel.“How do you want to do this?” Buffy says.Faith grins in the dark, hefting her sword over her shoulder. Blue blood drips off the end, mucus thick; the remains of the sentries.Buffy rolls her eyes. “I don’t know why I even ask,” she says, but Faith’s already launched herself from behind their cover, trying her best Xena yell. The first demon is dismembered before Buffy throws her first punch, the head rolling to rest at Buffy’s feet.“One!” Faith yells.Buffy ducks, swings, and more heads fall. The blood stings where it touches her skin; beheading is so messy.“Three!” she yells.
-
“Still wasn’t a date,” Buffy says. “Dates don’t usually involve unknown body fluids.”“The best do,” Faith says, leering. She throws an arm over Buffy’s shoulder, reeling her in so Buffy falls into her side.“Urgh,” Buffy says, and tries to shrug out of Faith’s grasp, but Faith laughs, sharp and clear, and twists around so she’s still holding on. They grapple right there on the street, Buffy shoving at Faith while Faith’s arms wind tight around her waist. “Unhand me!” Buffy yells when Faith pins her arms.But Faith doesn’t let go until Buffy starts fighting dirty, kicking Faith in the shin. Faith hops away, feigning hurt.“We should get home and wash off,” Buffy says, gruff. “You don’t know what those demon juices’ll do to you.”Faith gasps, insincere. “You do care,” she says.
-
“Seriously?” Faith says as she walks in the door.Buffy shrugs behind her, stepping over the threshold. “Small, simple, gets the job done.”“But there’s no pizzazz. Give me a knife, something that needs some mad skill, you know? But a stake?” Faith makes a face. “Boring.”Buffy rolls her eyes. “Or the scythe.”Faith sighs. “Now there’s a weapon.” They both turn to look at it, propped in the corner.“I think it’s angry with us for leaving it,” Buffy says. There’s a moment of respectful silence.“Even looking at it is getting me hot,” Faith says, ruining it.
-
Faith strips in the middle of room, the windows still wide open so any passerby could see.“Faith!” Buffy gasps, voice strangled, but Faith grins. She’s got an already-fading bruise beneath her ribs, and her skin is red and irritated where it’s touched the demon blood.“Thought you might wanna help me wash this stuff off,” she says, eyes wide and voice dripping with mock innocence. She grabs Buffy’s wrist, pulling her in so they’re chest to chest. She’s a little taller than Buffy, and she has to lean down a fraction to kiss her on the lips. “Unhand me,” Buffy says, smiling. She’s a mess; there’s a cold prickling under the demon ichor, and a hot sweat under where Faith’s skin touches hers.
-
Faith sleeps coiled, knees drawn up in a child’s pose. When Buffy moves closer in the night – so what if she’s a snuggler? – she often gets an elbow in the chest as Faith shifts restlessly. Buffy’s tried wearing her out; tried both fighting and sex, hurtling them both headfirst into a hydra’s lair or making Faith come so often one orgasm crashes into another. But Faith still flinches when she sneaks one arm over her waist, curling around her stomach.“Don’t suffocate me,” Faith says, voice thick with sleep.“Take it, bitch,” Buffy says, twining their legs together.
-
When Buffy wakes in the morning, Faith is already drawing a finger down the center of her, kissing the inside of her thighs. Faith must know when she wakes, because she murmurs, “Just relax,” and fixes her mouth over Buffy, sucking lightly. Buffy moans, making a high, surprised sound, and sinks her hands into Faith’s hair. She rocks into Faith’s mouth, fingers clenching, unclenching, clenching again. She’s desperate, hot for it, Faith’s got her going from zero to a hundred literally in the time it takes her her to open her eyes, but Faith seems content to draw it out until Buffy pants, “Faith, oh – please, please I –” and Faith puts two fingers inside her, working her, stretching Buffy’s cunt until Buffy comes, arching off the bed.When it’s over, Buffy slumps, staring blindly at the ceiling. “Good morning,” Faith says, rolling her r’s.Buffy just hums in reply. With Faith still in between her legs, Buffy stretches, toes pointing toward the end of the mattress, fingers curled up over the top of the headboard. She makes a satisfied sound in the back of her throat, a little purr that speaks of nothing so much as a cat well-fed and petted. “Getting up, princess?” Faith says around her grin.“I think it’s nap time already,” Buffy says, turning on her side, forcing Faith to roll over to avoid the closing scissor of her thighs. She punches her pillow a few times, and closes her eyes. “Behold,” Faith says, “the savior of the modern world.”
-
The sun hangs high, and Buffy makes Faith go through their rented one-bedroom apartment, closing the blinds and trying to block as much light as possible, although it's hard to keep the heat out when half the slats are broken or missing, and the ceiling fan is about as useful as a rusted art installation, at this point. The Watcher's Council sure had stopped spending big.“Maybe we should go out?” Faith says. “We’re running out of coffee. And toothpaste. But coffee.” It’s not very convincing, though – Faith hasn’t bothered to change out of her panties and a stained singlet, stretched and saggy around her breasts. “We’ll get some tomorrow,” Buffy says. “We’re taking the day off.” She lifts the sheet, so Faith can curl in behind her.“Don’t you know how to take a day off?” she says, when Faith huffs.“What happened to that young blonde-haired teen with the weight of the world on her shoulders? I miss her.”“No you don’t.” Buffy says.“I really don’t,” Faith says, pressing a kiss on Buffy’s bare back, right between her shoulderblades.
-
“I’m bored,” Faith says. It’s muffled from where her face is half-pressed into Buffy’s stomach. The rest of her is curled around Buffy like a comma, her feet hanging off the end of the bed while Buffy is propped up against the headboard, reading.Buffy doesn’t look away from her book, but one hand moves to scratch lightly at Faith’s scalp, running her hand down the back of her neck, and up to start again.It’s nice, but it satisfies Faith for only another minute.“I’m really bored,” she says. She turns her head around, and Buffy sweeps her hair away from where it’s fallen across her face. When Faith sees the title of the book, Buffy refuses to be ashamed. Her Majesty’s Secret Lover came highly recommended. From the Watcher’s secretarial pool.“How’s the book?” Faith says.Buffy shrugs.“Is it hot?”Buffy groans. “Of course that’s what you wanna know.”Faith’s smiling, small and secretive, and it’s so easy for Buffy to believe this is a Faith that only she has ever got to see. She scoots a little further down the bed, rolling onto her stomach, parting Buffy’s knees with one single, slow-moving finger, giving Buffy plenty of time to realise what’s happening. “Again? Oh wow, we’re - yep, let’s - oh, you’re really - okay, sure -” Buffy says, sliding down the bed when Faith yanks her even closer. “I’m bored, so you gotta entertain me,” Faith says, still grinning, hooking her fingers in Buffy’s underwear so she’s got to raise her hips so Faith can roll them down and away.“Ah,” Faith sighs, close enough Buffy can feel the air from her breath.“Sure, totally, okay,” Buffy says.
-
When the phone rings, Faith doesn’t move. Buffy huffs.“Hello?” she says.
“Buffy. I just wondered how things are faring over there.”
“Fine, Giles.”
“The Kilswurf demon infestation?”
“They’re itty bitty gooey pieces. Except not the yummy melted-chocolate-chip gooey. The gross off-Jell-O-that’s-been-shoved-to-the-back-of-the-fridge gooey.”
“Excellent. You’re coming back soon, I trust?”
“I’m afraid not. There’s a, uh. Vampire colony. Underground,” Buffy spins. Faith nods emphatically, and gestures for Buffy to continue. “Me and Faith, we’re going to, you know. Nip this thing in the bud. Stop it before it takes root in the community. Save small children.”Faith smirks. Buffy shrugs.
-
“Put on your dancing shoes,” Faith says, tucking a stake into her boot. “We’re going on a date.”When they get to the cemetery, Buffy’s sneakers sink deep into the mud, making squelching noises as she walks. “Real fucking stealthy, Summers,” Faith snorts, earning herself an elbow in the side.“This is still not a date,” Buffy says. “I paid,” Faith says, a wounded hand over her heart, her other gesturing at the Slurpees they both held.“You never take me anywhere nice, though,” Buffy says.“Oh baby,” Faith says, mocking. “Next week, I promise I’ll take you to a good old-fashioned Satanic massacre. I’ll let you grind all that black lipstick under your boot heel.”“Promises, promises,” Buffy says. She takes one last sip of her lemon-lime Slurpee, sets it on top of a tombstone, and slides into a crouch as the first vampire approaches. She kicks high and it stumbles backward, right onto Faith’s stake.“One,” Faith crows.
|
10590225
|
Smeared Lipstick
|
{
"Archive Warning": "No Archive Warnings Apply",
"Category": "F/M",
"Characters": "Martin Crieff, Theresa of Liechtenstein",
"Fandom": "Cabin Pressure",
"Language": "English",
"Rating": "General Audiences",
"author": "by ottermo",
"chapters": "1/1",
"completed": "",
"published": "2016-07-04T00:00:00",
"words": "100",
"Additional Tags": "Team Bobsled, Drabble",
"Relationship": "Martin Crieff/Theresa of Liechtenstein",
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|
The dowager queen of Liechtenstein glared at the two late arrivals to the banquet, but said nothing.“Uh-oh,” Martin whispered. “So much for slipping in unnoticed.”“Just act naturally,” Theresa hissed, one hand hastily pinning back some strands of hair that had come loose during her and Martin’s accidental wrong turn in the palace gardens.“Theresa,” Martin murmured, “You’ve got…” He gestured towards his lips.Frowning, she checked her reflection in the back of a spoon. Her lipstick was, perhaps, a little smeared. Not daring to excuse herself so soon after arriving, she wiped off the rest on a napkin.
|
10548222
|
Atribut
|
{
"Archive Warning": "Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings",
"Category": "M/M",
"Characters": "Derek Hale, Stiles Stilinski",
"Fandom": "Teen Wolf (TV)",
"Language": "Русский",
"Rating": "Mature",
"author": "by OwlPhoebe",
"chapters": "1/1",
"completed": "",
"published": "2017-04-05T00:00:00",
"words": "582",
"Additional Tags": "Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Drabble, Marking, Intimacy, Sexual Tension, triskelion, Перевод на русский | Translation in Russian",
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|
- Успокойся, – говорит Стайлз. - я в порядке. Выглядит хуже, чем есть на самом деле.Руки Дерека неподвижно лежат на бедрах парня. Он не касается украшенного темными синяками и кровоподтёками бока Стайлза. Здесь есть и порез, - уродливая рана, её края стянуты плотными стежками. Черные нитки туго натянуты и выглядят неестественно на его бледной коже.- Я ничего не говорил, - Дерек раздраженно сопит, уткнувшись лицом ему в живот.Они лежат в постели Дерека. Стайлз привалился к изголовью кровати, а Хейл улёгся между его ног. Он осторожный со Стайлзом и ласковый. Неотрывно смотрит на парня в своих руках.- Ты очень громко хмуришься, - фыркает в ответ Стилински.Стайлз сопротивляется настойчивому желанию, провести большим пальцем по морщинке в уголке поджатых губ оборотня. Вместо этого он слегка проводит ногтями по коже, оставляя пурпурно-красные отметины. Он знает, что это отвлечёт Дерека. Дерек спускается ниже, утыкаясь носом в бедро Стайлза.Это небольшое смещение привлекает внимание Стилински к испещрённым чернилами плечам Дерека. Взгляд Стайлза цепляется за тройную спираль, что впилась в кожу бугрящихся мышцами плеч, и странное чувство расплывается у него в животе: тугое и горячее.Это пугает - то, как много он думает об этом. Терзает изнутри бесконечным голодом. Едва уловимое шепчущее желание, что пульсирует в голове, но он никогда его не озвучит.Он надеется, возможно, Дерек и так знает.Если его и Дерека примитивные инстинкты резонируют на одном и том же отчаянном, приглушенном тоне, может на каком-то коллективном подсознании они соединяют их воедино, от натянутых нервов до самих костей. Это больно.
А может, он просто проводит слишком много времени с Дереком?Стилински прекрасно понимает, что никогда не спросит об этом у оборотня.
Только не в голос.Но, наверняка, Дерек может видеть это в его затаенных взглядах или слышит во внезапной стесненности дыхания. Вполне очевидно, может чуять это в его запахе. Стайлз полагает, от него сильно пахнет железом. Хотя….На кровь не похоже. Больше напоминает последствия чего-то смертоносного.Позволь мне оставить метку.Трискель дразнит его, блестящий и темный, и такой постоянный.Стилински думает, что если бы имел способности Дерека, мог бы зарычать на татуировку. Это не из-за того, что она существует... Больше из-за того, что она значит.
Символ того, чего Стайлз и надеяться не может достичь, несмотря на все его потуги.Остальная часть кожи Дерека лишена каких-либо других следов: никаких синяков или шрамов, которые давали бы видеть через призму тела всю суть этого человека.
Его кожа - оружие без памяти, нет ничего нежного в её мягкой безупречности, и нет места для лени в напряженных умелых конечностях.Но Дерек прекрасен, ведь все точенные грани его тела и бугрящиеся мышцы, отточенны с разрушительной целью. Осознание этого заставляет Стайлза гореть желанием опуститься на колени перед ним, или впиться зубами в плоть, да поглубже.Прошло много времени, пока он осознал это.Возможно, Дерек тоже понимает. Может даже больше, чем Стайлз.Потому что Дерек говорит: "перестань", и льнет к нему, медленно целуя, руки осторожно кружат по его израненным бокам и спине, и останавливаются на шее.Стайлз не может устоять, и вонзает ногти в трискель, желая выжечь себе путь в Дерека. Разворотить себе место в груди оборотня.
Чтобы остаться там навечно.Дерек медленно приподнимается на локтях и смотрит на Стайлза. Его глаза - настороженность и пылающая сумрачная темнота. Напряжённые. Непредсказуемые.Стайлз хочет его встряхнуть, хочет наорать. Почему никто ему не сказал, что любовь ощущается так?!- Успокойся, - вновь повторяет Дерек, хрипло и ворчливо, - в свойственной ему манере, - как будто общаться словами ему невыносимо. - Это намного хуже, чем кажется.Он делает паузу, проводит пальцем по губам Стайлза, заставляя замолчать. И продолжает:- Поверь мне.Стайлз чувствует это, в глубине души. И улыбается в ответ.
|
10524585
|
Through These Eyes
|
{
"Archive Warning": "Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings",
"Category": "F/M",
"Characters": "Haruno Sakura, Hyuuga Hinata, Uzumaki Naruto, Uchiha Sasuke, Hatake Kakashi, Original Female Character(s), Namikaze Minato, Dai-nana-han | Team 7 (Naruto) - Character, Dai-hachi-han | Team 8 (Naruto) - Character, Gai-han | Team Guy (Naruto) - Character, Dai-jippan | Team 10 (Naruto) - Character, Hyuuga Hiashi",
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"author": "by imaginesakura",
"chapters": "3/?",
"completed": "",
"published": "2017-04-02T00:00:00",
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...The sound of the door slamming ricocheted off of the walls and resonated throughout the small house, amplifying the intense atmosphere between the man and woman who’d come to consider it home.The woman whose long hair cascade around her heart shaped face in a curtain of light rosette could barely acknowledge the man before her as he stood in all his regal baring, speaking words that continued to shatter her heart a piece at a time.“I didn’t mean for you to find out this way.” He spoke quietly and to anyone who didn’t know him, without apology.But the woman before him did know him, better than anyone else, and she knew that his voice held sadness and regret. But she also knew that neither of those things could truly change the consequences of the decision he made for them.He made his bed, now he must lie in it.
Without me.
“Why? Why did you do it?” She whispered brokenly, regarding him once more with his dark, silky hair brushed back over his shoulders which were swathed in an expensive kimono. She could hardly recognise the man she loved in the hard man that stood in her apartment.A pained expression crossed his face almost making her regret asking the question but she had to know. She knew it might break her, but she needed to hear it, if only so it would make her stronger in the aftermath.“I know you had a choice, you didn’t need to heel to the pressure of your clan, so why? Why didn’t you wait for me?”The clan leader watched as the strong woman he loved crumbled in front of him, never looking away so he would remember exactly what he’d brought upon them. What he’d brought upon her. His heart was filled with pain and regret that he concealed using all of his training as clan leader. However, deep down he truly believed that this would be for the best. So, putting on his most genuine expression, he spoke what she needed to hear.“Mihana,” he said in a tone that held all of his love and all of his loss.“You’re such a free spirit, always open and kind. I couldn’t allow the clan to take that from you. And we both know they would have.”Mihana’s eyes widened in shock then betrayal at what she was hearing. Didn’t he realize she would have given up her freedom just to be with him. No matter what his clan expected she would have stood by his side because she loved him so much it hurt.But that wasn’t what hurt her the most. He didn’t believe in her. He didn’t believe she could withstand being the leader of his clan. He believed she would break from the pressure and duty.“No, your clan couldn’t take that from me…” She said then paused to draw in a deep breath before exhaling, trying and failing to hold back tears that threatened to fall down her face. “Because you already have.”As her small frame shook and tears began to fall in earnest, her arms encircled her waist in an act of protection while she tried and failed to hold in the sobs that threatened to burst and unravel her very being.The dark blue fabric of his kimono entered her vision as he took a step towards her and made to raise his arms to bring her into his familiar embrace but he was stopped by her words and the reality of their situation became clear to him.“Don’t.” She whispered in a shattered voice that made him want to hold her once again and never let her go.Because he did love her. By the Kami’s, with all of his heart he loved her. “Please,” She said, her voice still shaky in anguish at their broken relationship and fear of what would become of her if he continued. “Just leave, Hyuuga-sama.”But her words reminded him that it wasn’t his place anymore.And the truth of the matter was that he was no longer hers. He had a wife and would eventually have children. They could no longer be together.Hiashi felt as though he was just struck with a gentle fist to the heart at the use of his title and it wasn’t until then that he truly realized what he’d given up. Mihana was the only woman who saw him as he was. She was his confidant, his friend, his lover. She was his everything.Dropping his arm and taking a step back he choked out, “Hai.”Turning, he made his way to the door and walked away.Away from his hope, away from his future, away from the woman who’d become his home, and unknowingly, away from his family.All the while the piercing sobs beyond the door echoed through his head, and the only comfort offered were his own hollowed words.
This is for the best.
.
.
.
The following weeks Mihana returned to her normal routine, working at the hospital while avoiding as many well used places as possible, including the markets. This often-meant dining out or not eating at all, but to the rosette, this was a little price to pay in order to escape the pain of seeing her former lover with his wife.The week after their separation, she’d gone to the market later than normal in an attempt to avoid him but was unfortunate enough to come across he and his wife and had to force herself to ignore the sensation of her heart being torn out of her chest and the burning behind her eyes.Donning the facial expression she used on ANBU missions, she’d continued to go about buying her groceries before using the body flicker jutsu to return home where she proceeded to drop her bags at the entrance and allow her sorrow to consume her until she fainted.Three days later, Mihana found herself standing in front of the Yondaime Hokage with an air of determination and a look of resolve that put even the recently wedded Namikaze a touch on edge.“Mihana-neesan,” Minato said to his friend in acknowledgment. They’d both grown up together at one of the many war orphanages in Konoha and were close as children. And though every time he requested to see her for a mission she asked him to drop the ‘neesan’, he adamantly refused.“Hokage-sama.” Mihana replied formally, causing him to sit up straighter and slightly narrow his eyes in growing concern when she didn’t respond to his usual informality and instead the use of his title.“What can I do for you Mihana?” He said straight to the point.He hadn’t seen his sister figure much since the end of the war but whenever she’d been in his office she’d seemed normal if not happier than usual. So, he could only speculate that her current demeanor was the result of a recent change.“I heard at the ANBU captains meeting today that you were looking for someone to establish an ANBU post close to the Land of Earth border and would like to put forth my own name for consideration.”Mihana could feel his assessing stare in the silence that engulfed the room following her statement and gave her own in return.“Why?” He questioned.Minato couldn’t think of a reason she would want to leave and they’d known each other since they were younger. Mihana had been eight when her parents died while he was six, but they had both been taken in by the orphanage around the same time. He remembers the week he arrived there, a few of the older kids had tried to bully him and Mihana had come charging in and straightened them out with her fists. From that day on, he’d followed her around until she agreed to teach him. It had only taken him calling her ‘Onee-san’ one time and they’d become family.“I’m pregnant.” She said causing the Yondaime’s eyes to widen in surprise before blurting out, “What? How? Who?”“I really hope I don’t have to explain to a recently married man how I ended up in this condition.” She tried for a humorous tone but it only came out sounding sorrowful and broken causing Minato to observe her more keenly.“Neesan…” He said concerned while she smiled and said in a similar tone, “Otouto…”They both looked at each other fondly for a second, smiling softly in remembrance of their childhood.“It wouldn’t exactly be a safe environment to raise a child.” Minato started only for her to immediately shut down his attempts at negation.“It would be unsafe for me to raise a child anywhere with my reputation.”And it was true.During the war both shinobi had made names for themselves. Her own may not be as well-known as the ‘Yellow Flash’ but it was renowned and feared enough to give her a sizable bounty and to threaten any of her children despite being clan-less.“You’re not exactly convincing me.” Minato stated in a deadpanned voice.“The fact that I’m a medic will contribute to both my cover and use at the out-post as well as my past experience in ANBU.” She continued with more determination.“And what about when you have the baby?” He asked knowing he’d already made the decision but didn’t want her to go. To lose ‘Konoha’s dancing blade’ would also be a great loss to the shinobi ranks. In both the General and ANBU factions, not many people have her experience in both.“The town I’ll stay in will probably already has a mid-wife who can help with the delivery, and I would only require a weeks’ rest before my chakra will be fully functioning again.” She rebutted.“And what of the father?” The brief flash of pain across her eyes was all the fourth Hokage needed to give in to the resolved Kunoichi. All of her points were valid and this would essentially be beneficial to them. And Minato trusted her to make the right decisions for herself.“Fine, but if we ever need you, you must return, no exceptions.” He said to which she nodded gratefully while smiling.“You also have to report monthly.” He continued and seeing her still nodding said cheekily, “And I want to be the God father.”The comment got him a kunai sent towards his face which he caught by the handle on his finger and began to twirl around while smirking.“Okay God daddy,” Mihana said with a cheeky grin. “But by the time she’s born I expect her to have a God brother on the way.”She then made her way out of the room leaving the now blushing Hokage behind to think about his own future family....Haruno Sakura was born in a trading village near the borders of Fire and Grass named Morikawa. She came into the world a week early in late March when her namesake was in full bloom with a tuft of pink hair that confused the midwife as much as it caused relief in her mother and humour in her God father.“She’s so small.” Minato said, his God daughter cradled safely in his arms as he sat beside the bed.“Babies generally are.” Mihana responded tiredly, lips quirked in a soft smile as she gazed lovingly at her daughter.She was glad Minato had made it for the birth. When the contractions had started, she had feared she was going to have to go through it alone, but Minato had arrived using the Hiraishin, saying he had had a feeling and ran straight to the midwife after using a jutsu to make his hair look the same shade of brown as her own and his clothes look civilian and travel worn.A small whimper caught her attention and she watched as Minato stood up to give Sakura back to her when he froze midway, eyes focused on his God daughter.“Mihana… Her eyes…” He said slowly. His brain trying to process what he was seeing. Crying in earnest now, the blonde quickly handed off the baby, before sitting back down and waiting patiently for his sister to explain.And she did. When Sakura had fallen asleep, Mihana told Minato everything. How she met Hiashi on the battle field and saved his life. How they started dating towards the end of the war and how he proposed to her before her mission, only for her to return two months later and find him wed to another.Minato listened to every word she said and complete loathing filled him at the thought of the Hyuuga. Minato had attended his wedding as both the Hokage and a friend and even congratulated him. Now all he felt like doing was stabbing him in the face with a kunai.“Was I selfish, Minato, for going through with this?” Mihana’s sad voice broke him from his thoughts and Minato’s heart broke a little at the sorrow held in it.“I don’t regret keeping her. I don’t think, I would ever be able to regret having her. She’s a little piece of him and me. And I love her so much. But when the clan finds out…”Minato’s heart clenched at the thought but he was the Hokage dammit and he would do what he could to make his God daughter’s life as happy as possible.“Don’t worry about the Hyuuga clan, Oneesan,” A look of determination on his face. “I’ll take care of everything.”A tear slipped down her cheek when she smiled. “Thank you, Otouto.”A silence settled in the room, both lost in thoughts before Mihana broke it.“Tell me, how Kushina-chan is going?”A bright smile came over his face as he spoke about his wife, knowing the seals he put up would alert him to any unwanted listeners.“I kept my promise neechan.” He said seriously but with a mischievous look in his eye. “Sakura-chan will have a God brother to play with later this year.”...
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
..After Sakura’s birth, Mihana resumed her work with no problems.Most days, she would find herself in her small flower shop, Sakura strapped to her chest or asleep in the cot she’d moved into the shop, creating bouquets and caring for the flowers while picking up any gossip and news that passed through the village.Before leaving Konoha, Minato, Shikaku Nara and herself had sketched out a fake identity for her that she would establish when she arrived.Her cover was Hanako Harada, 23 years old and widowed after her husband died in a bandit attack on their way to visit her brother. Hanako decided she could no longer live in the village her husband called home, so she travelled to Morikawa with the money she got from selling their home. And though living near the edge of the village, opened a small flower shop, hoping as a trading village it would bring in more customers.Mihana had been extremely thankful to Minato when he returned to her home unannounced with a seal in hand to hide Sakura’s eyes not even a week after he left. It was one thing to draw attention by giving birth to a baby with pink hair, and another thing entirely for that baby to have the eyes Sakura had, which practically screamed Kekkei genkai and ninja.The seal Minato had given her when attached to the body would lay a light genjutsu over the person which would only stop if the seal was removed or ran out of chakra. The amount of chakra used to activate it and keep it running was miniscule enough that only genjutsu specialists, high-level sensors like the Uzumaki or shinobi with doujutsu kekkei genkai, like the Uchiha or Hyuuga, would be able to catch it.It made Mihana’s life much easier and she was hopeful it would also make Sakura’s in the future.She would also occasionally have ANBU teams drop by on their way too, but they were few and in between. Some would crash for a night if needed and they had the time, but most only stopped long enough to be healed then moved on.A seal in the bunker when activated was connected to a sister-seal on Mihana, which would alert her to their presence and need for healing. And though she hadn’t needed to do any major surgeries yet, it helped that they recognised Mihana as one of their former captains that had trained with them and fought beside them in the past.This left Mihana with lots of time on her hands that she used to set up a small information network in the village and with its surrounding towns, and time to get her body back into shape. It also helped to keep her mind off the past and Hiashi.Watching Sakura grow and learn often left her feeling sad and regretful that Sakura would never know a father’s love and that she could never give Sakura an ideal family life. Though if Mihana had learned anything growing up an orphan in Konoha, just like with her and Minato, bonds can tie people together just as strongly as blood can, and sometimes, even stronger still.This routine kept up until September when an unexpected face dropped by. She really should have expected it with Kushina-chan’s due date approaching, but she was still pleasantly surprised.“Jiraiya-sensei!” She greeted once they were within the hideout’s barrier seal.“Mihana-chan! You are looking more beautiful than ever!” He exclaimed wiggling his eyebrows lecherously.Mihana sighed in exasperation but was truthfully happy to see her sensei again. The last time they had seen each other was at the announcement of Minato as Hokage which was prior to Orochimaru’s defection. But she was glad to see the Sannin was still the same man she knew as a child.“And you haven’t changed sensei.” Jiraiya grinned again before noticing curious green eyes peering up at him from over his former student’s shoulder.“Oh! And who is this cutie? Don’t tell me she’s yours, Mihana? I thought we had a conversation about safe se-”“I thought we agreed to never bring that up ever again.” Mihana spoke over him, internally cringing. It was the most awkward and embarrassing conversation of her life, and she’s sure it was Minato’s as well. Though Jiraiya often found it humorous to bring up at inappropriate times.There was an unspoken agreement between them to never speak about that day.Ever.“Well are you going to introduce us?”Smiling proudly, Mihana undid some of the straps on the baby holder and brought Sakura around to hold on her hip.“This is my daughter, Sakura Haruno.” Lifting Sakura’s small hand up, she waved it at Jiraiya and said, “Sakura-chan, say ‘hi’ to Jiraiya-Oyaji.”Jiraiya scowled at her comment and joked, “See, this is why Minato is my favourite.”, but couldn’t stop his grin when the pink haired baby smiled shyly up at him and cooed before burying her face in her mother’s neck.She was definitely going to be a heart-breaker. Just like her mother....Once Sakura was placed on her stomach and happily dragging herself around on her play mat, Mihana placed some tea on the small table and took a seat opposite her sensei.“Minato’s work?” Jiraiya asked, nodding towards Sakura and Mihana internally sighed.She really should have known that Jiraiya would pick up on the seal. He may not have been a genjutsu specialist or sensor, but he was by far the best seal master in the shinobi nations who wasn’t an Uzumaki.“Yes, though I think Kushina-chan helped.” She replied calmly.Their team had always been close, and they only grew closer after their third team mate, Hikaru’s, death. Even if Minato was his favourite, she knew she could trust Jiraiya with anything, including him not revealing the truth about Sakura’s parentage.But she wasn’t going to say anything if he didn’t ask.Hearing her daughter’s unintelligible babbling and cooing, Mihana’s eyes drifted to her place on the mat, only to see her crawling determinedly towards her. She let a soft smile cross her lips and held her hands out, but Sakura turned at the last minute with a laugh and made her way towards Jiraiya.Brushed off, Mihana pouted while watching Jiraiya pick her up and begin to make faces at her daughter who giggled cutely for a while before she grabbed a strand of Jiraiya’s white mane and started chewing enthusiastically while babbling again.“Ugh…” The sannin complained and tried to have Sakura release his hair only to have her yank on it and begin laughing again.“This is why I don’t have kids.” Jiraiya bemoaned still trying to get Sakura to release her firm grip on his hair. “So, what’s wrong with her? I thought if anything, it would be her pink hair you’d want to conceal.”Mihana put down her tea cup and walked around to pluck Sakura from Jiraiya’s lap, then sat down beside him. Pulling Sakura’s shirt up, she removed the seal from her back, earning excited squeals and claps from her daughter who practically threw herself at Jiraiya again and began pulling at the clothes at his stomach.“I’ve come across plenty of unique doujutsu,” He commented thinking about Nagato’s Rinnegan and Uchiha Kagami’s Mangekyou Sharingan, “But these are a first even for me.”Mihana nodded. “Sakura-chan’s father is a Hyuuga.”Jiraiya paused before questioning, “Like the ‘stuck-up, stuffy, arrogant’ that you used to complain about all the time Hyuuga?”Sighing again, Mihana could only nod in affirmative.“Huh. Never thought you liked the ‘pretty’ type ’Hana-chan.” Noticing the angry tick forming on her brow, Jiraiya put his hands up in a placating manner. “Maa, maa, I was just joking.”Mihana huffed, then watched as Jiraiya lifted Sakura who had still been patting his stomach excitedly, so that they were face to face. The baby looked at him curiously, her bright green eyes wide and white pupils unnervingly fixed on him, until she raised her hand and smacked him again and they changed back to pupil-less bright green.“Evil tyke.” Jiraiya muttered handing Sakura back off to her mother and rubbing at his sore nose.Jiraiya watched the baby curl up in her mother’s arms and waited for her to doze off before he asked, “How long has she been able to activate it?”“A few hours after she was born, she surprised both Minato and I. We were worried at first that she might have been blind, but we also weren’t sure if it was something unique to Hyuuga clan children.”“Aa, I’ve never seen a Hyuuga baby, I just assumed they were born with their eyes…” Jiraiya motioned to his eyes with his hands before shrugging, “ya know?” Mihana just nodded in agreement.“How often does she activate it?” Jiraiya asked. “I don’t mean to worry you, but I’m surprised she doesn’t run out of chakra.”“I know, it was a worry of mine too.” She said before continuing.“I usually have the seal on her during the day, and I think she hates having it on because she always whinges and pouts for a good while after we leave home. But I check her over every night just to be sure it’s not hurting her.” “And her father?”“He knows, but the clan doesn’t.” She paused before adding. “The situation is complicated.”Jiraiya tenses his jaw. “Who else knows?”“Just you, her father, Minato and Kushina-chan.”Nodding along, Jiraiya suggested, “You should inform the Hyuuga clan head, so he knows in the case of a fall out. He’s friends with Minato, isn’t he? Don’t be afraid to use those sorts of connections.”Mihana tenses up slightly before replying softly with a hint of sadness she couldn’t quite cover. “He knows…”Jiraiya looked at her then and internally winced when the dots in his head connected what she was implying. Just thinking about the political mess his student’s child was going to make if she were found out had him cringing.“Well, good luck!” Jiraiya joked, laughing nervously, to which Mihana joined in, though more hysterical than funny, before a few tears escaped the corner of her eyes.“Hey, Hey! None of that now! I’m sure everything will work itself out. You’ve got the Hokage on your side, the red hot-blooded habanero and the legendary Jiraiya! What more could you need huh?”Mihana wiped the tears from her face and smiled, reassured that when she needed them, her team would be there to support her.“Anyways, I brought you a gift.” Jiraiya says pulling out a novel from his inner pocket. Mihana took it gently and smiled when she saw Jiraiya’s name on the spine.“Minato already has a copy, but I wanted you to have one too. Let me know what you think the next time I see you.”Turning it over, she read the front cover curiously.
The Tale of the Utterly Gutsy Shinobi.
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
..Mihana sits at her small table with a cup of green tea watching her daughter crawl around the room. A month has passed since Jiraiya dropped by and her days have been filled with a calm that disturbs her.Only three ANBU teams have passed through in that time, and none have needed any help, so Mihana has found herself spending her days working listlessly at the flower shop for the past couple of weeks.It makes her anxious, not having anything to do besides train, work, and her favourite part of everyday, spend time with her daughter. She couldn't lie and say she doesn't miss going on missions and spending time with Kushina and her other friends, but she also couldn't say she regretted having Sakura and sacrificing her shinobi career to be able to raise her daughter in peace.Sakura is a fresh splash of colour in her life, that surprises her every day.Her pink hair has taken on a slightly darker hue than her own, making it more magenta than pink, while her pupil-less eyes remained a light shade of green.But despite taking after her mother in colouring, Mihana cannot stop the pain in her chest when realizing that in almost every other aspect of her face, her daughter takes after her father. She feels somewhat sorry for Sakura knowing that she will inherit her father's wider than average forehead. She just hopes Sakura will grow into it as she gets older and won't be teased for it too much.Mihana knows only time will help her move on from Hiashi, but as each day passes and she still finds herself thinking of him and what they could have been, she sometimes wonders if she will ever be able to move on at all.Was he happy with his wife? Did he have any other children? Would he ever meet Sakura and if he does, how will he react?Every time these thoughts enter her mind, the wound in her heart is re-opened and she finds herself holding back tears that she refuses to let fall.Looking at her daughter, her last conversation with Jiraiya resurfaces in her mind and she chews on her bottom lip in worry."Mihana, you should watch Sakura carefully to make sure she isn't expending too much chakra accessing her doujutsu. If she doesn't end up with chakra exhaustion or blind from overuse, I'd be surprised."
The rosette looked at her daughter in worry before replying.
"I've been checking her over regularly every night with medical chakra and I haven't found anything wrong. I considered blocking her chakra too, but the effects of doing that at her age could cripple her chakra core and I don't want to risk that. Are there many cases of shinobi going blind from using doujutsu too often?"
Mihana knew that most clans had their own medics to care for their wounded. It was rarely the case where an outsider was privy to knowledge on clan kinjutstu and doujutsu.
"Ah… it's mainly in the Uchiha clan, though Hyuuga have been known to strain their eyes on occasion too." Jiraiya paused before looking at her again. "Listen, I don't want you to have to worry too much, but I'll speak to Kushina about it in Konoha and see if there's anything she can do…"Sitting on the table in front of her was the novel Jiraiya had given to her, autograph included, that she finished two weeks ago. She smiles thinking about the main character, Naruto. A shinobi searching for the answer to peace and unwilling to give up.She remembers when she was a genin how Jiraiya would tell their team stories of his 'adventures', and wonders if this novel was actually based on his life.Though most women in Konoha knew him to be a pervert, Mihana is sure it's mostly a front. When he wants to be, Jiraiya is actually a very serious person. While he believes that you should enjoy as much of your life as you can, he has also always believed that peace between shinobi is achievable. And in some ways, those ideals have passed on to his students.Minato embodies their sensei's will more than Mihana ever could, so much so, that she thought Jiraiya had based his main character on him. It was only the dedication in the back that made her realize differently.Thinking about Minato and Kushina made her wonder when her God son would be born. She found herself remembering fondly her childhood with Minato, growing up at the orphanage. She wonders if their children will one day grow to have such a bond.Mihana knows that she will return to the village one day to raise her daughter. She also knows that Sakura and Minato's child would likely both be entering the academy the same year, so the possibility of them becoming friends, even without their parent's influence, is fairly high.Picking up her tea cup to drink, she is surprised to hear the glass break and see a crack form at the lip that splits half way down one side. An ominous feeling begins to fill her, and she puts the glass down hastily, picks up a yawning Sakura and goes to check the seals in the house are all up and working before making her way to her room....Sleep evades her throughout the night as the worrying feeling persists in her gut.Something is wrong.Shinobi are taught to trust in their instincts, and she can feel her own instincts telling her this, she just doesn't know the reason behind it.When she wakes the next morning, dark lines lay beneath her eyes from lack of sleep. Preparing Sakura for the day also takes more effort as she's more fidgety and temperamental than usual. Mihana wonders if Sakura is reacting to her own feelings or if she can feel something is different too.It isn't until an afternoon customer stops by that understanding dawns on her.'A demon unleashed in Konoha', they say. 'Thousands of dead in one night'.Mihana has never wanted to pack her things, take Sakura and return home so much before. Her situation with Hiashi didn't matter anymore, her village needed her.Minato would need her.She was one of the few people entrusted with the knowledge that Kushina was the host of the Kyuubi. If the seal had truly broken and the Kyuubi had been released, then it was likely that her friend was either dead or dying. She knew the seal was weakest during childbirth, but she didn't understand how it could have happened. Minato and Jiraiya should have been there with her, they had planned it so nothing like this would happen.And what about her God son? Was he safe somewhere, or had he perished in the aftermath as well?Mihana wanted to drop everything and return home.Tears gather in the corners of her eyes, and she turns her back on the customers in the store, pretending to be focused on some Freesias.She knows she can't leave just yet.If news of this has already reached this far from Konoha via civilian routes, then it's possible it's already reached Iwagakure. She wasn't naïve enough to think there weren't any spies planted in the land of Fire, and she knows this could lead to another war if the aftermath isn't handled right.So as much as she wants to return home, to make sure her loved ones are alright, her position near the Iwa border is now more crucial than ever. She would wait for Minato to send word and would follow orders from there on out. She just prayed he sent them soon.Just as she thought it, the seal connected to the bunker begins to warm on her skin and she doesn't waste any time telling her customers she is feeling unwell before closing the shop....Mihana looks at the ANBU across from her. His form is muscular but on the lean side, and he's easily six feet tall with spiky brown hair. Whether that's his natural colour, she didn't know and didn't bother to inquire. The red lines painted onto his mask depict a hawk, but what catches her attention is the thin, red scroll in his hand with the black strip running down its length.After each reciting their code words, she takes the scroll from him, willing her hands to stop shaking, her heart thumping harshly in her chest. Slowly unrolling it, she is unable to keep the building despair from escaping her chest and begins to sob after reading the words.
Minato!
...The destruction wrought on Konohagakure was unimaginable to Mihana until she reached the gates and saw it for herself.When she imagined returning home, she had hoped it would be under happier circumstances. Taking in the destruction before her, she can feel her heart ache at the knowledge that thousands of lives have been lost.When she catches sight of the Hokage mountain, her eyes immediately find the face of her brother and a single tear escapes from the corner of her eye before she wipes it away, the only sign of the void now present in her heart.
Minato…
She spent the last few days of travel to Konoha in mourning for the loss of her brother. Since she was orphaned, Minato had been the one constant in her life. He was the person she relied on when she needed someone to speak to, or train with. Someone to share news with or cry with.And now he was gone.She would never again train with him, or share jokes with him, never sit together and talk about their lives on the Hokage mountain and talk about their dreams.Quiet sniffles bring her out of her thoughts and she looks down at Sakura who is crying earnestly now. Rocking her soothingly in her sling, she watches Sakura bury her face in her chest and quiet down before approaching the gate guards.She signs in and makes her way to the Hokage's office, not missing the chakra flicker in her peripheral, letting her know the Hokage will be made aware of her arrival.Walking past demolished buildings and homes, and dodging debris that has yet to be cleared, she observes how the mourning of her village seems to linger in the faces and movements of all of villagers as they go about their duty. There isn't a person present whose shoulders aren't slumped or lips downturned in sadness, despair or anger.Even the children all seem to pick up on the darkness lingering over the village and are not smiling or playing as they should be. Their innocent view of the world crushed by the onslaught of destruction wrought upon their home not even a week ago.Reaching the Hokage's office, Mihana nods to the guards before entering. She would rather have left Sakura in a friend's care but with the state of the village, she was unwilling to risk it.The creaking of the large door announces her arrival and she is met by the assessing gazes of the elder council and the mournful acknowledgements of Shikaku Nara and the third Hokage."Mihana-chan," Hiruzen greets her with a small smile that doesn't reach his tired eyes, "We've been awaiting your arrival.""Hokage-sama." She chokes out, her eyes watering, remembering the last time she was in this office. Minato had been behind that desk, his sapphire eyes alight with life as they joked about the future of their children and reminisced about their own childhood.She imagines him sitting there, greeting her with warm eyes, Kushina by his side with her brilliant smile and baby in her arms. But her vision disappears like a released genjutsu and she is left staring into mournful faces.Minato would never sit there again, overlooking the village they had come to love so much.She would never hear his laugh again or see his smile. She would never again see his face turn red as she teased and embarrassed him. And they would never again just sit and talk, dreaming up ways to make a better future for the village.A better future for their children.Mihana's sorrowful face, slowly transitions to emotionless as she listens to the Hokage's advisers coldly discuss what has come to pass and what will be done in the future with Minato's son until her mask breaks.Why Minato didn't get rid of them while he could, she will never know.She is outright glaring and ready to kill someone by the time she is granted permission to leave. As she makes her way to the isolated ward of the ANBU hospital, she thinks on Minato and Kushina's son.An innocent child who will grow up fatherless and motherless, along with hundreds of other Konoha children. But unlike the others, will be burdened by the village's hate for something that was beyond his control.Mihana doesn't know when she starts to cry, but by the time her thoughts clear, she is standing outside an ANBU guarded room, a familiar chakra signature thrumming weakly on the other side.Despite not sharing blood, Mihana had claimed Minato as her brother a long time ago. They had grown up side by side, slept side by side, trained side by side, laughed, cried and fought side by side.Minato became her family.And there were few things that she wouldn't do for her family....
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silence keeps you
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{
"Archive Warning": "No Archive Warnings Apply",
"Category": "M/M",
"Characters": null,
"Fandom": "Torchwood",
"Language": "English",
"Rating": "Mature",
"author": "by belle_abroad",
"chapters": "1/1",
"completed": "",
"published": "2009-01-15T00:00:00",
"words": "764",
"Additional Tags": null,
"Relationship": "Jack Harkness/Ianto Jones",
"Character": null,
"Relationships": null,
"Series": null,
"Collections": null,
"Fandoms": null,
"Archive Warnings": null,
"Categories": null,
"Bookmarks": null,
"Chapters": null,
"Comments": null,
"Completed": null,
"Hits": null,
"Kudos": null,
"Published": null,
"Words": null,
"Updated": null
}
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Fancy a Winter break in Wales? There is nothing quite like relaxing in front of a blazing log fire in a cosy cottage, warming up after a long winter walk or maybe a day playing in the snow. The winter months (December, January, February) are our coldest months. The days are short and temperatures are in the region of 0°C to 8°C. A few days of snow are even a possibility.
Barely awake, Ianto pushes his nose into the warm skin beside it, snuffling a happy laugh when Jack yelps.“Hey, your nose is cold!” he complains, and Ianto just shakes his head, rubbing the icy cartilage against Jack’s shoulder again.“I know,” he mumbles, “and your shoulder is warm.” Jack smiles and lifts his arm over Ianto’s head, drawing him closer and settling gently under the comforter.“Well, if that’s the case,” he murmurs, and he hears Ianto sigh with the contentment of the half-awakened.They lie in silence for a while, Jack staring at the still ceiling fan and Ianto’s dozing breath whuff-whuffing against his chest in a comforting, almost ticklish way. It’s the first time in a long time Jack has been able to stare into nothingness in utter relaxation, with no worries and no regrets, and he relishes the time he’s spending here, in this solitary place. Ianto is warm against him and Jack’s heart is impossibly full.True, that losing Tosh and Owen dealt a blow more tender than he could ever imagine; true, that Gray’s all-too comprehensible revenge brought him unmentionable grief and guilt; true, that he has to rebuild a team as well as his own memory. But something about this house in the middle of nowhere, warm under the blankets even as the snow piles up around them, brings him peace, and surety. Here, in this lonely brown cabin on a high white hill, he can count the freckles on Ianto’s elbows or venture bravely forth wrapped in a blanket to make passable tea and thickly buttered toast; he can memorise the contours of Ianto’s ears or build up the fire and feed him soup out of the enormous chipped mugs in the cupboards. It’s a freedom he rarely feels, to be trapped by the weather with only his lover for company, and the solitude affords him all the time to appreciate that which he has not yet lost.Ianto stirs against him, still not quite returned to slumber yet not nearly awake enough for what Jack has planned, and his slender hand clutches a little harder at Jack’s hip. Jack smiles indulgently down at him, at his sometimes appallingly boyish face and slightly furrowed brow, and smoothes one tanned hand over Ianto’s dark, finely curling hair before kissing his head in a manner neither wholly affectionate nor erotic, his sometimes confused feelings of both mentor and lover mingling perfectly for the occasion. Ianto’s eyes flutter open and he registers Jack’s jaw, kissing the bend in his own wordless response. He whuffles again into Jack’s chest, groaning happily. It’s as if he, too, has lost all care in this unexpected winter abandonment; as if he, too, has forgotten that worry exists in the world. Their entire universe has narrowed to the places where skin is touching skin, and neither the whistling snowstorm nor the creaking of the house can intrude on their isolation.Jack passes a hand over Ianto’s jaw and draws him up for a real kiss, morning breath and all. Ianto’s nose is much warmer now, but Jack’s is not, and he can feel Ianto smile against his mouth accordingly. Ianto moves up; Jack moves down; until their bodies align suitably and the covers can be thrown over their heads, both burrowing underneath like children in a blanket fort. They kiss, and touch, and explore, but there is none of the usual urgency in their hands, a product of Torchwood’s “busy schedule.” Instead, they are relearning each other in this place of wholeness, where the white blanket covers everything objectionable, makes the entire landscape bright and new. Every discovery on Ianto’s body seems utterly novel to Jack, who remembers only the basics of their previous couplings; Jack’s brilliance almost blinds Ianto, its radiance undimmed by schedules or crises. The lazy lovemaking sends them into even more potent oblivion, and as they settle against each other once again it is Jack who falls endearingly and innocently to sleep, and Ianto who guards him with fierce tenderness. It seems all the more clear, after this beautiful morning, that only death can part them now.
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10587534
|
Breezy Monday
|
{
"Archive Warning": "Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings",
"Category": "F/M",
"Characters": "Nathan Drake, Elena Fisher",
"Fandom": "Uncharted (Video Games)",
"Language": "English",
"Rating": "General Audiences",
"author": "by orphan_account",
"chapters": "1/1",
"completed": "",
"published": "2017-04-10T00:00:00",
"words": "551",
"Additional Tags": "Puddles - Freeform, Sky Blue, taking a walk, Breezy, Spring Week",
"Relationship": "Nathan Drake/Elena Fisher",
"Character": null,
"Relationships": null,
"Series": "Uncharted Spring Week 2017",
"Collections": null,
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Elena shifted against a snoozing Nate on the couch and smiled softly when he sat up and snorted, pawing at his eyes. He was so cute when he wasn’t all there. Which, she would never admit to out loud, she felt was often. She giggled. “Well hey there, sunshine.” He turned his head and smiled back lopsidedly, his eyes foggy with sleep. “Hey.” he croaked. Nate sat up straight and pulled his arms up into a stretch and groaned, Elena taking this opportunity to snuggle under his armpit closer to him. “Hm, this is nice.” Nate made an agreeable sound and they settled back into a comfy position, each fully intent on going back to napping. Unfortunately they only had a moment before Vicky came running in, nails clacking on the hardwood through the house, upon hearing the couple stir. Nate groaned. It had been raining all morning, and Vicky definitely took after her namesake — not even remotely interested in the rain, even when nature was calling. Diva. He listened closely and it seemed that the rain had stopped. Vicky came up to them and sat at Elena’s feet, who sat up and ruffled her golden fur. “Hey there, girl. You want to go outside?” Vicky barked in reply and circled around herself, clattering to the front door. Nate turned back over and hoped that since Elena had brought it up, she would be the one to take her. Elena, realizing what her husband was doing, poked at his side and tickled him. “I don’t think so, cowboy. Come on, it looks nice out.” She pointed to the large window behind them and Nate followed her gaze, admitting that, yes, he supposed it did look nice out. “Fine.” He grumbled in defeat and sat back up, almost being thrown to the side when Vicky came scrambling around him from behind the couch. “All right girl, come on! Let’s go, lead the way!” He clapped his hands excitedly and got her all riled up for their walk. Once they had her leashed and ready to go, Elena grabbed an umbrella, just in case, and walked arm-in-arm out the door with Nate. Vicky tore down the steps and attempted to pull at her restraints when Nate gave a warning sound and she slowed down, giving the tether some slack. “Good girl” he cooed, and she wagged her tail in response. The sky was a beautiful blue and the air was clear from earlier’s rainstorm. It was breezy, but not uncomfortably so, just enough of a gentle wind to be pleasant. Elena pulled herself closer to her husband and leaned her head against his upper arm, sighing quietly. Nate smiled and looked down at her, pressing a kiss to her pulled back blonde hair. They stopped when Vicky found a spot to relieve herself in and they looked across the street to give her some privacy. “Is Sam coming for Easter Sunday?” Nate blinked. “Not sure. I didn’t know we were doing anything, did you want me to invite him?” “Of course. And Sully, too.” He nodded and felt a gentle pull of the leash again when Vicky was finished and they continued down the sidewalk, mindful of the puddles in their path and thanking Vicky for being prissy enough to avoid them, too.
|
10560676
|
Ready Go
|
{
"Archive Warning": "No Archive Warnings Apply",
"Category": "F/M",
"Characters": "Jackson Avery, April Kepner, Margaret \"Maggie\" Pierce",
"Fandom": "Grey's Anatomy",
"Language": "English",
"Rating": "General Audiences",
"author": "by another_maggies",
"chapters": "1/1",
"completed": "",
"published": "2017-04-07T00:00:00",
"words": "823",
"Additional Tags": "Harriet is in this, like somehow, and even Samuel, family stuff, my dream of what is Japril's status right now",
"Relationship": "Jackson Avery/April Kepner",
"Character": null,
"Relationships": null,
"Series": null,
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|
Jackson got home later that night, with fewer possessions. He was glad that he'd brought the files and pictures to Maggie, where they belonged. But he didn't regret not giving them to her earlier.Yes, he'd wanted to. When Diane died he'd wanted to go to the hospital, long before Maggie's dad got there, and he'd wanted give everything he had to her. He was just about to leave when a hand on his wrist had stopped him."Don't", she'd said."I have to", he'd argued."She's not ready", she'd insisted, "Don't."And he didn't. The funeral service had been beautiful. Very much like Diane, full of color and light. She'd wanted everyone to wear a colorful accessory. Jackson had chosen a light blue tie. A very meaningful one. He'd not worn it since that day. He'd considered throwing it away after another meaningful day. He never could. Now he was happy he hadn't.The flowers for the grave had been composed of wildflowers, roses and lilies in all colors. The marching band had played So long and Thanks for all the fish.After it had been over he went to the park. He'd found them easily, their white dresses standing out brightly against the green landscape. She'd smiled when he joined them."How was it?", she'd asked."Beautiful", he'd said. There wasn't anything more to it.Her face had been an open book of worry to him. "Are you sure you wanna do this? Today, I mean. We could-""I'm sure", he'd insisted.And she'd trusted him. He hadn't given Maggie the pictures that day.To be honest, he'd forgotten about them for a while, his focus on his own life after months of being elsewhere. There had been things he needed to tend to, and Maggie... it was easier without her in the equation.He'd thought about her, of course. When he'd spotted the pile on his desk before he went to bed, he'd thought about her. Then he'd thought it might be best if he took them to her this instant. He had been halfway through tying his shoelaces when his voice of reason had reminded him:"It is almost midnight, Jackson."And that had been true. And he'd never finished tying his shoelaces. And he'd not taken the pile to Maggie. And he'd gone to bed, because it had been late. But not for Maggie. However, Maggie was back now, and she'd seemed okay and he'd complimented her and she wasn't okay, and she obviously needed something, but she wouldn't say what it was and it was just so hard to watch her struggling like this, she was his friend after all, and he knew, he knew what it meant to go through grieve alone, or what felt like alone, no offense there, it wasn't like-"I think you should go give her the pictures now", she'd commented on his rambling. "I think she's ready."And he had. And Maggie had been ready. And somehow, although it was late that night it wasn't too late. He got home long after he went out. He got home to a dimly lit house and neglected calling "I'm home", knowing it would wake up his daughter. He shed coat and shoes and tiptoed towards the bathroom where he took a shower and brushed his teeth before he went to his bedroom.The lights were still on and she was there, reading, her glasses high on her nose."Hey", he greeted her in a low tone. He didn't want to startle her."Hey yourself", she said, her eyes focused on the book. "How did it go with Maggie?""You were right", he admitted without the faintest feeling of remorse. The phrase didn't initiate that feeling within him, not anymore. "She was ready."She nodded. No "I told you so", just a nod."What are you reading?", he asked."I'm not reading", she informed him.He studied the cover of the book and realized."Oh, April...""I'm not sad", she told him. "I just... I wanted to see him today."Jackson let himself sink onto the cushions next to her to get a look. He'd seen it too many times. He'd never see it often enough."Jackson?""Yeah?""Do you think we were..." She lifted her gaze from the picture album to look at him. "Do you think he was ready?"He'd pondered his response for a minute given the sensitive subject matter. "I think we were ready. The three of us. He just got the easy way out."She hit his chest. "You're horrible.""And still you love me.""Shut up, Avery.""Shut up yourself, Mrs. Avery."Her lips pecked his and he felt her glasses against his cheeks."That's still Dr. Kepner to you.""Mh, bossy", he said kissing her."You'd get that way if you spent a whole day with truly hopeless residents... Oh, I might have contracted TB today.""WHAT?"
|
10551182
|
It Feels More Like A
|
{
"Archive Warning": "No Archive Warnings Apply",
"Category": "F/M",
"Characters": "Ryuu (Akagami no Shirayukihime), Shirayuki (Akagami no Shirayukihime), Obi (Akagami no Shirayukihime)",
"Fandom": "赤髪の白雪姫 | Akagami no Shirayukihime",
"Language": "English",
"Rating": "General Audiences",
"author": "by LittleAverill",
"chapters": "1/1",
"completed": "",
"published": "2017-04-05T00:00:00",
"words": "849",
"Additional Tags": "Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence",
"Relationship": "Obi/Shirayuki (Akagami no Shirayukihime)",
"Character": null,
"Relationships": null,
"Series": "If There's a Reason I'm Still Alive",
"Collections": null,
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"Archive Warnings": null,
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"Completed": null,
"Hits": null,
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"Published": null,
"Words": null,
"Updated": null
}
|
Green and glass fill his vision. Ryuu's hands do not tremble. One . . . breathe. Two . . . breathe. On three, he squeezes the pipette, and a single drop lands on the massive leaf. He leans back into his chair for observation, spine cracking audibly as he straightens. His sight widens once more, and his ears open up to the conversation behind him."Let's go on a picnic." Shirayuki declares.Ryuu glances over his shoulder to check on them. Obi is perched on the edge of Shirayuki's chaotic desk, somewhere between keep working and go gather herbs immediately: still safe. He allows his attention to be drawn back to the hissing experiment. Huh. He brings the mortar and pestle closer and continues grinding."I'm suspicious. What are your motives?" Obi's voice dances when he is happy, never more so than when he talks with Shirayuki."Nothing bad." She is working diligently as well; she always works harder when Obi is watching."But am I correct in assuming Ryuu isn't coming with us?" He is teasing now, and even with Ryuu's back turned, he can tell they are both stifling their laughter."Next time, we'll all go to the lake together." It is a promise, even if she does not say so.Ryuu sets the pestle down cautiously. It would be nice to spend the day with them, and the slight variations between similar species in the greenhouses and the ones across the lake are fascinating. He keeps meaning to go but always ends up swamped with pharmacy work."And today?" Obi continues, already certain of the answer. All of them know how this conversation will go, but it does not lessen the meaning of it."Just us."Obi laughs, and Ryuu has never heard it so carefree. "Sounds like a plan," Obi says, and Shirayuki hums.Ryuu cringes. Entering dangerous territory here."I've got the food all ready, so I just need to finish up here." Shirayuki had hidden the basket beneath Ryuu's desk earlier that morning. Ryuu's stomach refused to stop grumbling with food nearby, but half of it would be spicy enough to melt his mouth. He was not willing to take any chances."A star-filled sky, good food, and your company? Sounds perfect, Shirayuki." . . . Maybe he should go get those herbs now. But . . . his experiment. He stares helplessly at the solution steadily eating its way though the leaf. He cannot just leave it halfway. Stick it out, then. Behind him, something clatters to the floor. Obi giggles.They would not actually do anything with him around. . . . Right? He is not going to turn around to check.To Ryuu's relief Shirayuki finishes without any more . . . distractions. He stands so she can retrieve the basket from beneath his desk. His stomach gurgles obnoxiously, and Ryuu flushes. Shirayuki only smiles and rummages through the basket. She hands him a berry tart, which he takes gratefully. He has not eaten since . . . he thinks he had breakfast?Obi ruffles his hair, darting away before Ryuu can protest; it was not like it was neat in the first place, but really? His glare has no affect. Obi shrugs off Ryuu's attempt at intimidation with a laugh before bouncing out the doorway. Shirayuki hugs Ryuu, a fleeting warmth and the smell of herbs. Before he can wonder if he would like to move away, she is gone. Ryuu watches her go to where Obi lingers in the hall, waiting. Her eyes smile before her mouth does, and her grin looks wide enough to hurt."Goodbye," they call, their voices tripping over each other. This prompts another giggling fit, and they lean into each other in their attempt to remain upright. Ryuu is almost glad they are leaving.He is stirred from his musings when his experiment starts smoking. Well, that is . . . unanticipated. Ryuu reaches for the glass of water that sits beside his elbow, waiting for him. Shirayuki or Obi must have left it there; he hopes they do not mind he is using it to dowse the growing flames.Obi pops his head through the doorway, startling Ryuu into nearly dropping the glass. His legs bang into the desk, one knee bumping painfully into a piece of metal. Water dribbles off the wooden edge into his lap, and he hastily moves away. Obi's mouth twitches suspiciously, but, wisely, he refrains from commenting."Shirayuki forgot to grab the mail when she left this morning. Could you stop by and get it for us?" Obi grins; this is not the first time Shirayuki has forgotten the mail this month.Ryuu returns the vials he knocked over to their stand. "As soon as I'm done here," he says. He would be cutting it close, but he could finish the experiment before the workers at the messenger outpost went home."Thanks, Little Ryuu!" Obi's voice echoes from down the hall."You're welcome," he murmurs to the empty room. He does not need to worry; they will be back before morning.His eyes narrow on the wet clump of charred leaf on his desk. Time to figure out what went wrong.
|
10509120
|
touch
|
{
"Archive Warning": "Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings",
"Category": "M/M",
"Characters": "Kim Himchan, Bang Yongguk, Moon Jongup, Yoo Youngjae, Jung Daehyun, Choi Junhong | Zelo",
"Fandom": "B.A.P",
"Language": "English",
"Rating": "General Audiences",
"author": "by ZainBAP",
"chapters": "1/1",
"completed": "",
"published": "2017-03-31T00:00:00",
"words": "3,138",
"Additional Tags": "Alternate Universe - Shapeshifters, Full Shift Werewolves, Werewolves, Pack Dynamics, Pack Feels, Fluff, Himchan's POV",
"Relationship": "OT6 - Relationship",
"Character": null,
"Relationships": null,
"Series": "best absolute puppies",
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|
Himchan is not a morning person, but he is a heavy sleeper. The rest of the house can come alive around him without it interrupting his slumber.Today, however, he jolts awake at the sound of shattering porcelain. As if someone dropped a plate in the kitchen. Himchan groans and rolls over to the other side of the bed, ears picking up the explosions of voices from downstairs. He tells himself they'll handle it just fine without him, despite their alpha's fear of conflicts. It can't always be Himchan's job.The door to his bedroom creaks, and Jongup's familiar scent reaches his nose."Hyung? Are you awake?"Himchan grunts."Almost."The mattress dips, and Himchan finally peers one eye open as he turns back around. Jongup smiles sweetly at him, lying flat on his stomach on top of the blanket. He's wearing sweats and a loose t-shirt—their usual dress code for weekends at home.Just the thought makes something warm and soft settle in Himchan's gut. Knowing the kids won't be leaving for school. That the pack will be together. Lazy Saturdays are the best."I made coffee," Jongup tells him, his voice slightly muffled with one cheek buried in the second pillow. "I would've brought you a cup but Yongguk-hyung wouldn't let me."Himchan hums, internally rolling his eyes at Yongguk trying to lure him out using coffee as bait. It's annoying how well it works. He reaches out to brush some strands of hair out of Jongup's face."That's why you're my favorite," he sighs.Jongup's smile stretches even wider."Favorite son?""What?" Himchan scoffs. "No, that's weird.""Why?""Because I like to hold your hand."Jongup looks thoughtful."You hold everyone's hand.""And I don't think of any of you as my sons or brothers," Himchan clarifies, sitting up. "You're just my favorite. Period. Now, come on. I need that coffee."Once entering the kitchen, the scent of embarrassment lingers on Daehyun. There's a broken mug in the sink. Himchan quirks an eyebrow at Yongguk, but the alpha actively avoids his gaze. Giving up, Himchan takes one of the still-intact mugs from the cabinet and pours himself some coffee before joining the others around the table.Breakfast is loud and messy, per usual.Daehyun and Youngjae are bickering about an incident Himchan isn't familiar with. Junhong is trying to tell everyone about the new trick he managed to do on his board earlier this week, but only succeeds in getting half the pack's attention. Yongguk is trying to listen in on every conversation at once, though not contributing with much on his own. Jongup is mostly focusing on eating his cereal.When Daehyun suddenly reaches over to pat Youngjae on the head, as if he were a small child, Youngjae hastily swats at his arm. It instantly earns them everyone's attention."Yah!"Daehyun's whole expression changes, going from amused to serious in a heartbeat. He looks almost hurt, and it's not what Himchan had expected at all."What?" He asks, as if he truly doesn't understand what he did wrong.Youngjae hesitates, looking confused. He had probably expected Daehyun to keep up with the teasing, just like Himchan had."Don't pat me on the head," he says after a moment. His voice is uncertain, as if he can't tell if Daehyun is messing with him or not.There's a pause, Daehyun's pulse skipping a small beat, before saying:"You like it when you're a wolf."Complete silence falls. Jongup stops mid-chew. Himchan feels the urge to gape, but doesn't. For a long moment, no one does anything. Until Youngjae finally breaks the uncomfortable silence."We don't talk about that," he says flatly.Because they don't. It's always been this unspoken rule between them, not to talk about the touches exchanged between them while they're in their wolf forms. Himchan can't say how or why it happened, but he suspects Yongguk was the reason.Daehyun looks uncharacteristically uncomfortable from all the attention, yet somehow determined."We should," he says, and Himchan hears the pick-up in his heartbeat. His eyes flicker around the table, making it clear he's not just speaking to Youngjae anymore. "What if I do something you don't like?"His voice sounds unstable, and Himchan quickly realizes this is something Daehyun has been thinking about for quite some time. Something he's wanted to speak his mind about, but hasn't dared. Probably worried they'd all react exactly like this.Jongup is glancing at Himchan, probably hoping for him to say something. Junhong is carefully looking in Yongguk's direction for the same reason, always dependent on his leader's opinion. Yongguk, in turn, looks mortified.Himchan thinks that it they all just wait long enough, their alpha will probably say something eventually. But that's gonna take too long, and everyone already looks ready to curl in on themselves. Daehyun looks like he regrets ever opening his mouth."You're right," Himchan says. He immediately has everyone's attention, the whole pack staring at him in disbelief. "We haven't— It's not—" He sighs softly. "Look, consent is important, okay?" The two youngest nod wordlessly, for which Himchan is grateful. "We can't speak when we're transformed, and I know that's a relief, an escape, for some of you—"He doesn't look in Yongguk's direction; doesn't need to. He can see the leader clenching his jaw in the corner of his eye, knowing he's the one Himchan's referring to. Hell, they all know."But Daehyunnie is right," Himchan continues, seriously. "We should be able to talk about things that happen, things we do, while we're in those forms. It's just as much us as right here, right now."Daehyun blinks, and Himchan can smell the hope radiating from him. Himchan gives him a small smile in reassurance, and Daehyun gets something very soft in his eyes."We're a pack, a family. We should be able to trust each other with this, just like anything else. We won't judge each other." Himchan lifts his eyebrows in question, looking between all of them. "Right?""Right," Daehyun says quietly, and the two youngest once again nods in agreement.Youngjae and Yongguk remain quiet."Great," Himchan says pointedly, deciding not to pressure them. He knows they're listening. Knows they agree, but are currently too shy to speak openly. "So let's have a family meeting. If there's anything anyone would like to share—something you dislike or want to encourage—feel free to do so. Now."Another silence reigns, only this time they all glance at each other almost expectantly. They can all sense the emotions around the table; embarrassment, anxiety, but also excitement, and it's not just from Daehyun.Still, he's the one bold enough to speak up first."I— I like… everything," he admits in a small voice, eyes cast down. "When you guys pet me, hug me, or coo at me. Just— I like everything."Himchan isn't surprised by this, but it still feels surprisingly relieving to hear Daehyun say it out loud for the first time. Knowing that even the times when he's thought he'd taken things too far, Daehyun most likely liked it. They really should've talked about this a long time ago."Something you don't like?"Daehyun looks thoughtful, then slowly lifts his gaze from the table to look Himchan in the eye."No? I mean— You guys don't do anything bad. If I do something bad—"He suddenly looks really worried."I don't think you do anything bad," Jongup chimes in, as if wanting to reassure his hyung."Me neither," Himchan offers. "You're just as needy as when you're human, and I always pretend to be annoyed by it, but I'm not."Daehyun's face lights up at that. Junhong looks amused by Himchan's confession, a lot more relaxed now than a moment ago. And when silence once again settles over the table, he's the one to break it."I like when you all treat me like I'm still a puppy," he admits, clearly shy about it. "I… I miss being pulled into someone's lap."This doesn't surprise Himchan either. Seems like everyone misses the wolf cub the omega had been in the beginning of his transformation, even Junhong himself."You'd still fit in our laps," Jongup points out, smiling sweetly at his friend. "Yongguk-hyung was practically in Daehyun-hyung's lap that one night, and he's huge."Yongguk, who's been sitting perfectly still ever since this conversation started, somehow still manages to freeze at the mention of his name—of that night. Daehyun's heart skips a long and obvious beat, and he actively avoids meeting anyone's gaze.Himchan wants to roll his eyes at them both."Uppie is right," he tells Junhong. "We can still do that. If you want."Junhong nods quickly, blushing with a wide smile lighting up his face. He glances over to where Youngjae's sitting, and Himchan thinks he knows why. Knows Youngjae was the one who used to coo over Junhong the most when he was a still puppy."Something you want us to not do?" Himchan asks.Junhong looks hesitant for a moment, before carefully saying:"Maybe… be careful with your teeth when you chase my tail?""Ah," Jongup says lowly. "I second this."They both look so uncertain about speaking out, but Himchan is proud of them."Sorry," Daehyun mumbles, looking truly regretful."It's okay, hyung," Jongup assures him. "It's just— We all have really sharp teeth when we're wolves, you know?"Daehyun scoffs weakly, nodding. They do."Let's all be more careful in the future," Himchan decides.Everyone nods; even Yongguk tilts his chin down. Progress."I like belly rubs," Youngjae suddenly says, surprising everyone."I knew it," Daehyun says under his breath.Youngjae's head quickly turns to him, prepared to be embarrassed by the smug look on his friend's face, but stops short when Daehyun only meets him with a gentle smile. He wasn't mocking him. Youngjae swallows, cheeks still a faint pink."Just… If you pat me on the head when I'm human it just feels degrading.""I didn't mean for it to be degrading," Daehyun hurries to say. "It was meant to be endearing!""Well, it didn't feel endearing," Youngjae counters sharply, but everyone hears the affectionate stutter of his heart. He's still blushing. "Pat me somewhere else."Daehyun's gaze flickers. The corners of his mouth twitches, like he's fighting back a smile."Where?""I don't know," Youngjae snaps, embarrassed. "Somewhere. Anywhere. God— Can we move on?"They all chuckle, clearing the air. The tension only remains thick in Yongguk's corner of the table."What about you, hyung?" Junhong asks, looking at Himchan.Himchan shrugs, fumbling with the coffee mug in his hands."I got no complaints. Keep doing what you do.""So you don't want more scratching behind your ears?""Actually. Yes. Thanks for noticing, Dae."The delta looks awfully pleased with himself.Himchan looks over to the alpha, hoping to get him to join the conversation. Yongguk meets his gaze steadily, wordlessly. Some might've taken it as challenging, as if daring him to say something, but Himchan knows what it really means.
Not here. Not now.
Himchan nods, and directs his attention back to the younger members who pretend they didn't notice the exchange. Later, when Youngjae and Junhong have claimed the TV to play Nintendo, and Jongup and Daehyun have ran out of the house on all fours to let off some steam, Himchan finds Yongguk on the front porch. He's sitting cross-legged with a canvas in front of him, brush in his hand. He'd picked up oil painting a while back, and it's become his stress reliever. Just like Jongup's is racing through the woods.Himchan had tried it a few times, when Yongguk looked like he needed company. It's always a guessing game; what the alpha needs, because of course he never says it outright. That'd be too straightforward, too easy. Himchan takes great pride in being able to read the man better than anyone else, but even he gets it wrong sometimes. Yongguk is anything but simple.The leader doesn't look up when Himchan steps outside. Doesn't need to."Checking up on me?" He asks, tone unreadable.Still, he puts the brush down and moves the canvas to lean against the railing to dry."I think you need to understand a few things," Himchan explains, sitting down in the spot left vacant by the canvas. "About us. About you."Yongguk's swallows. He doesn't look surprised. He shouldn't.Silence reigns for a moment, as Yongguk looks down at his hands. Himchan tries to figure out where to start. He inches closer. Close enough for their knees to brush. The alpha lets him."We don't see you any differently as a wolf," he says eventually, voice careful. "You're always the same, Bbang. Do you hear me? To us, you're always the same. We don't expect different things from you depending on what form you're in."Yongguk purses his lips, looking hesitant to answer at first."It's not about some stupid image, Channie," he eventually mumbles, sounding troubled. "I don't care what— I just…" He shakes his head, helplessly. "I'm not good at this stuff.""Stuff?"Yongguk exhales heavily, shoulders sagging."Affection."It's barely a whisper, as if scared to say the word out loud for the first time.And while Himchan has never doubted that their leader feels affection for them all, it still feels special to hear it from Yongguk's own mouth."I'm not like you, Channie. I can't just—""Why not?" Himchan presses. "What are you afraid of?"Yongguk suddenly looks small, hunching in on himself. Nothing like the alpha Himchan first met years back. Yongguk can be intimidating when he needs to, and it took a long time before he let someone see this vulnerable side of him. Sometimes Himchan wonders if he's the only one who gets to.Himchan sighs into the silence."Yongguk-ah," he says. Yongguk doesn't look up, but then Himchan didn't expect him to. "Not that you'd ever tell me, but my guess is you met a whole lot of bad people before me. Before Junhongie. You have your reasons for not trusting people right off the bat."They don't talk about their past much, but for other reasons than the touch thing. This is not about embarrassment or intimacy. There's a reason they're all here, and not with their blood relatives. There's a reason Junhong is still haunted by nightmares. There's a reason Daehyun's jeans were torn to shreds when Yongguk first found him.Some of them Himchan knows. He knows why Jongup ran away from home, because the younger told him one night. When no one but Himchan was there to hear the tremble in his voice. Himchan never asked, but maybe Jongup needed to tell someone. Maybe it helped.Himchan used to believe they'd all feel better once they talked about it, but Youngjae didn't. It was like his own words tore an old wound back open. It was heartbreaking.As much as Himchan wants to know what kind of shit Yongguk went through before they met, he won't press for answers."But I'm hoping, that after five years of being a pack—of being a family—you actually trusts us.""I do," Yongguk says immediately, finally looking up. "Channie, of course I do.""Then trust that we would never reject you," Himchan tells him, pleadingly. "That if you reach out to any of us, we won't turn you down." He pauses. "Daehyun might cry out of happiness though."It's an attempt to lighten the mood, but he's still means it.Yongguk snorts, surprisingly, and it makes Himchan grin. The alpha sighs heavily, his expression slowly turning serious again. His jaw sets, eyes on the ground as if he's thinking it over. Himchan lets him be this time, lets him take all the time he needs.He looks out over forest in the meantime, managing to pick up the scents of Jongup and Daehyun as they chase each other between the trees. He can't see them, but he knows they're there. Not too far away. From inside the house, he can hear the faint sound of Youngjae and Junhong's heartbeats as well as their laughter.They're all there. Within his reach."I'll try," Yongguk finally says, breaking the comfortable silence. Himchan slowly looks back to him. The alpha steadily meets his gaze. He smells of affection and hope. "I want to. I always wanted to. I just—" He interrupts himself to nod. "I'll try," he says again.Himchan nods, too."We love you," he says then. "You know that, right?"Yongguk's heartbeat doesn't exactly stutter, but it does something. He doesn't look away from Himchan, his eyes seeming to widen a little. He swallows visibly, Adam's apple bobbing.Then he ducks his head down, leaning in to rest his forehead on Himchan's shoulder. He lets out a breath through his nose, shoulders sagging. Himchan opens his mouth to ask, but thinks better of it. He says nothing, just tilts his head to the side and rest his cheek on top of Yongguk's head. It's an embrace even without their arms reaching around each other. Hesitant and careful."Thank you," Yongguk says after a moment.Himchan can feel the heat of Yongguk's breath through his shirt."Sure," he just says. Like it's simple.Because it is.They stay like that for a while, until their hearts are beating in sync and Himchan knows his shoulder is gonna feel cold once Yongguk pulls back. It's nice. Himchan knows Yongguk must sense his happiness, but that's okay, because he can sense Yongguk's in return."I think Jonguppie and Daehyunnie are watching us," Himchan mumbles eventually, able to sense their presence but can't see them.Yongguk chuckles lightly, and slowly pulls back. Reluctantly, maybe. There's a faint embarrassment oozing off him, but that's okay. People need time to change. Himchan knows this."They shouldn't be surprised," the leader hums. "You're always the one who brings me back around."Himchan smiles, pleased."The kids do say we're like an old married couple," he points out, muttering.Yongguk scoffs."Well, they're kind of right," he says.Himchan groans dramatically, heart fluttering.It's not that he's in love with Yongguk—Himchan is pretty sure it isn't—but in a group perspective, they really are the parents of this family. And it makes him happy that Yongguk knows this, too."Never thought I'd get stuck in a loveless marriage," he jokes.He stands up, figuring his job here is done."Not loveless."Yongguk's voice is soft, as are his eyes when Himchan looks back at him in surprise. Yongguk smiles up at him, that small and private kind of smile only seen in moments like these. With just the two of them."Just different."
|
10570848
|
London Pride
|
{
"Archive Warning": "No Archive Warnings Apply",
"Category": null,
"Characters": "Delia Busby, Julienne (Call the Midwife), Patsy Mount, Trixie Franklin",
"Fandom": null,
"Language": "English",
"Rating": "Not Rated",
"author": "by blue_striped_pyjamas",
"chapters": "3/?",
"completed": "",
"published": "2017-04-08T00:00:00",
"words": "4,009",
"Additional Tags": "Modern AU, Pride, Basically I combined 3 things I love, Crossover, ? - Freeform",
"Relationship": null,
"Character": null,
"Relationships": "Delia Busby & Patsy Mount, Delia Busby/Patsy Mount",
"Series": null,
"Collections": null,
"Fandoms": "Call the Midwife, Lucy Spraggan",
"Archive Warnings": null,
"Categories": null,
"Bookmarks": null,
"Chapters": null,
"Comments": null,
"Completed": null,
"Hits": null,
"Kudos": null,
"Published": null,
"Words": null,
"Updated": null
}
|
It was Delia Busby's first week as a resident of London; the first week of her new life in England. She was a born and bred Welshwoman, the first 25 years of her life had been spent in a small, traditional village, tucked away in a sleepy corner of Pembrokeshire. The Bubsy family were known to be very traditional people, Mr and Mrs Bubsy had only left the village once, for a family holiday to the Isle of Man, when Delia was a very young girl. To any outsider, the Bubsy family was incredibly close, with two loving parents who absolutely doted on their daughter. Insisting that Delia recieved the best education, they had even sent her to a Welsh speaking school, even though they were few and far between in Pembrokeshire - little Delia had to endure an hour long bus journey twice daily from the age of 4, until she was 16. It was when Delia had finished secondary school that the trouble started. She did not want to stay on at the school she was at anymore, there was a sixth form only twenty minutes from her village, and the long bus journey's were tiresome. Refusing to stay at the school they had chosen for her, Delia's parents often pointed out, was her first act of rebellion. Her lifestyle choices, in their eyes, had all followed on from there. It was whilst she was at college that Delia had discovered a world away from her Pembrokeshire village. As well as her academic studies, Delia learnt about the prospects the vast world offered her, she learnt that she could do whatever she wanted, and be whoever she wanted to be. She also learnt that she was in fact gay. Delia's sexuality was not a big deal to her, she was attracted to other women, and she saw no issue with that, but it was a big deal to her parents; such a big deal that she had decided it was wiser not to tell them. It was a secret Delia kept to herself throughout her time at university whilst she was studying to be a midwife, even briefly dating a boy she met in her student accommodation, just to keep her parents from becoming suspicious. When she graduated, and moved back home whilst she looked for a job, Delia had decided to risk it and come out to her parents. It was 2017 after all, not 1960. The conversation had gone about as well as one would imagine the same conversation to go in the 1960's, and a week later Delia had been forced to pack up all of her belongings and move away, knowing that she may not ever be able to visit Wales again, never mind Pembrokeshire. That was how she had come to be living in London. Delia knew that there were plenty of hospitals in London, and if she wanted to find a job as a midwife, this would be the best place. Not only that, she had been able to find lodgings, in the spare room of a dear woman in her 50's, called Julie, and a job in a local pub, just to tide her over until she found a midwifery position. It wasn't home, but it was safe, and comfortable. Delia was a modest woman, she didn't need much. The house she was lodging in was close to a number of London parks, so there was plenty of space for Delia to run, and breathe some good, clean air - a rare thing, she had discovered as soon as she had got to London. On her very first day in the city, she had thought that the air quality would improve once she had left the Underground station, but she was sorely disappointed.As she sat in her room, eating dinner at the small table that Julie had been kind enough to provide her with, Delia disappeared into her memories of her old home. She missed her house, it was a quaint little cottage. She missed the character of it, she missed the way the drainpipe would leak, causing a quiet tapping on her windowsill whenever it rained. In London, the noises were all far louder, there was just a constant buzz of traffic, punctuated by the occasional siren, wailing into the distance. Delia often felt jealous of the sirens, they could wail and cry out, but she could not. She had no one here who would listen. She missed the creaking of the gate at the end of the garden path, she missed the pale off-white of her walls, she missed the familiarity of everything at home. There was a quiet knock at her door, bringing Delia back to the real world."You've just had a parcel delivered dear, a man dropped it off, intimidating chap, really darkened my door with the shadow he cast!" Julie called out.Delia quickly realised that it would be her father. She had risked emailing him her new address, hoping that he might have the decency to drop off the box of books she hadn't been able to fit into her suitcase."I won't be a moment Julie, I suspect it was my father" Delia responded softly."Mind if I come in dear?" came the response. Delia gave no objection, so after a silent moment the door handle turned slowly, and Julie walked in. "Oh, you do look so forlorn my dear, you need to get out and about, explore the city!! Get the blood flowing in your young veins, I'm sure you'll settle in soon enough. Why don't you pay a visit to the Pride festival this weekend? I have a friend who has a ticket that she doesn't need for a concert on the parade day, Lucy someone or other, far too young and trendy for me to go!"Delia looked confused for a second, she had never mentioned her sexuality to Julie, and she had hoped that it wasn't that obvious. She tried hard to not look like a stereotypical lesbian, wearing floral dresses and her hair up, even when she would be more comfortable in jeans and a big hoodie. Still, it didn't sound like a bad idea. She thanked Julie, the older woman pulling Delia in for a hug. Maybe a trip to Pride was just what Delia needed, maybe she would find community there, people like her. It might make London feel more like home, not her old home, but a new home, with new people.
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
It had taken Trixie Franklin 4 and a half weeks to convince her friend Patsy Mount to join her at London Pride, and the Lucy Spraggan concert being held as part of the parade. Trixie was obsessed with the X-Factor superstar, and she was an LGBTQ+ icon, so Patsy really should have been more enthusiastic. It wasn't that Patsy didn't like the idea of Pride, being surrounded by people like her, having fun and celebrating, as well as raising awareness of the issues still faced by the LGBTQ+ community. She just found that in reality, she didn't really fit in anywhere in the community. Patsy had grown up in Kensington, mingling with the most elite Londoners. Her family were originally from the far east, she had been born in Singapore, and had family in Hong Kong, but her earliest childhood memories only formed after they had moved to the English capital, where her father worked for business. Patsy often found that her accent was enough to set her apart, as hard as she tried, it gave her away as being a public school snob.Patsy Mount was one of the most emotionally closed off people one could ever meet. She had to be, to survive. Her mother and younger sister had both died when she was just 9, they had been caught up in an armed robbery and died from the injuries they sustained trying to escape. Money could buy many things, it could buy silence from the press, the best medical treatments, higher security from that day on, the grandest funeral, the list went on - but it could not buy back life. Her impenetrable wall that she built, not allowing her to become friends with anyone for a long time, had become a feature of her personality that the children she was surrounded with at school as a boarder chose to pick on her for. "Oh don't go near her, she'll bite your head off. Patience Mount doesn't deserve her name" were taunts that she had very quickly learnt to deflect, but that didn't mean that they did not affect her.The friendship between Patsy Mount and Trixie Franklin was unique. The two women had met as students, Patsy studying medicine, and Trixie studying film and screen studies, both at the University of Cambridge.There, both women had fit in as much as anyone else, Patsy coming from a family of privilege, but choosing to cut herself off from her father's money, using it only to pay for her tuition fees, and not taking any more money than any student would receive from the government, and Trixie coming from a troubled, but completely average London family. It had taken a long time for the women to build a bond, but after a year sharing a room in their second year, and getting far too drunk together, enough that both opened up to each other, they were inseparable.Patsy's issue with allowing herself to be emotionally vulnerable meant that she had never been in a successful, healthy relationship. She guessed that after so long, she had stopped feeling, stopped needing other people. After a string of one-night stands, she had found herself in a relationship in her third year at university, with a woman considerably older than herself. It hadn't worked out. Worse than that, the woman had abused Patsy, using her for her money, becoming violent when Patsy stood her ground, then casting her out. For a long time, Patsy felt like a puppy, cast out into the street, broken and alone. It had only made the woman collapse into herself, closing off from the world further than she ever had before.Once Trixie had got Patsy as far as the centre of Pride, she wasn't quite sure what to do with her. Trixie's first instinct, as always, was to head straight to the closest place where copious amounts of alcohol could be both purchased and consumed. Fortunately for her, at the back of the crowd waiting for Lucy Spraggan to make her way out onto the stage was a beer tent. Trixie dragged Patsy inside and bought them both a pint of beer. The concert had just started, so there was a rush from the tent, people fighting to get out into the crowd.No sooner than Patsy had picked up her drink, it was knocked straight out of her hand. Turning around to see who it was, her eyes fell upon a gorgeous woman, a little younger than her, in a bright yellow floral dress."Oh my goodness I am terribly sorry!" exclaimed the woman, looking as if she was going to bend down and try to rescue Patsy's drink from the floor, before realising what a ridiculous idea that was, blushing hard."It's okay, it's okay, I'll buy myself another one" Patsy replied, trying not to sound flustered. She had just noticed that the woman stood in front of her had the most captivating eyes, like deep oceans, just drawing her in... "Can I... um, would you like a drink?" Patsy shook her head subtly, trying to shake herself out of the trance the young woman had drawn her in to. "I'm alright thanks, but seeing as you asked, you could do me a favour and accompany me outside? I would quite like to enjoy the concert, Lucy Spraggan is amazing, but unlike you, I am lacking in the height department!"The woman had cheek, but Patsy liked it. She also had a soft Welsh accent, and Patsy really liked that, it sounded delicious. Patsy found herself drawn to the woman stood in front of her. Looking for Trixie, she realised that her companion had moved away to talk to a group of attractive women nearby. Not having anything to stop her, Patsy took the arm the shorter woman offered her, and forgetting completely about buying another drink, they joined the crowd at the back of the concert. Patsy found herself being dragged towards the stage, clinging on for dear life as they wrestled through the crowd. When they finally stopped, Patsy was surprised to be almost at the front. She felt way out of her depth here, everyone around her was singing along, and seemed to know every word, not least the younger woman accompanying her. Bending down slightly, so that she knew her new-found companion would hear her, Patsy whispered in her ear. "I don't know a single word!""Oh dear, well that gives us a wonderful opportunity! I shall have to meet you again, and teach you!" The woman stopped suddenly. "I have just realised that I haven't introduced myself. Not only that, I have stolen you from your friend, potentially your girlfriend, and dragged you to the busiest area of a concert to see someone you probably have no interest in at all. I'm Delia, Delia Busby (she blushed, she had no idea why she needed to include her surname), and as much as I would like to know your name, I would not blame you if you took this as an opportunity to run off." Bewildered, Patsy stood for a moment, before sticking out her hand, as if to great the other woman, Delia."Patsy. Patsy Mount."Both women promptly burst out with laughter, and took the entirety of the next song to compose themselves. Delia then began singing again, trying to get Patsy to join in for the chorus. Patsy resigned herself to simply soaking up the atmosphere, realising that the woman she had just met had made her laugh more in 5 minutes than anyone had in almost 10 years.When the concert ended, Patsy made sure to exchange phone numbers with Delia. Delia also insisted that they take a selfie together, and Patsy put up not fight, it would be nice to have a souvenir of the day. Once she had lost sight of Delia, who had had to sprint off to catch the underground, Patsy went in search of Trixie. After a thorough search of the beer tent, she found her friend, completely smashed, and attached to a very sober looking brunette. "Patsyyyyy" slurred Trixie. "You look happyyy. Happy Patsy. Like an excited puppy dog, with big, loving eyesss". Patsy knew that her friend had hit the nail on the head, but did not respond, pretending to let the comment fly over her head. Trixie gestured to the woman she was with."Patsy, meet Kate. Kate, Patsy". Trixie looked like she was going to throw up as Patsy peeled her away from the woman she was with."I've just rung for a taxi." Kate whispered. "Good luck".Patsy started to thank the kind woman, and apologise for her friend, but she had no chance to. Trixie threw up onto the kerb.
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
It took Trixie Franklin 45 minutes to drag herself out of bed and into the kitchen, shared with her housemate Patsy, the morning after Pride, her head throbbing. She clattered into the chairs around the kitchen table, trying to find a glass of water and painkillers. Patsy was already prepared for this, guiding her friendly gently back to her bed, handing her a glass of water and two small white pills. It was a well-rehearsed ritual between the two of them, and the last few months had given them more practice than was really necessary.Patsy knew that Trixie's drinking was becoming increasingly out of control, but her friend didn't seem to ready to accept it yet, as much as she needed to. Last night had been one of the worst nights in a long time, Trixie always seemed to be at her worst when she had drunk too much beer. She'd spent the night with her head in the toilet, with Patsy holding her blonde bob away from her face. Trixie had thrown up so violently, and for so long, that her still alcohol steeped brain had convinced her that she was dying. A few years ago, Patsy might have laughed at her for saying that, but she was a medical professional, and she knew the damage her friend was doing to herself, even if she was too scared to tell her.Trixie Franklin was known to everyone she encountered as one of the most friendly, loving people anyone could ever meet. Being drunk usually made her friendlier, and overwhelmingly so, but past a point, when she had gone past the point of giddiness, she became increasingly irritable. She didn't want to ask Patsy if she'd done anything outrageous the night before, but the bruise on her friends forearm suggested that she had."How much did of an idiot did I make of myself last night then?" she enquired, barely whispering, mainly because of the throbbing in her head, but also secretly hoping that Patsy wouldn't want to talk about it too long, the few memories she had of the night had the potential to be painfully awkward.Patsy hadn't heard the question, but she did see Trixie's eyes dip down to the bruise on her forearm."I had to drag you from the taxi, kicking and screaming that I was stealing you away from the love of your life" Patsy let out a chuckle, she knew that Trixie would be mortified, but she didn't mind that much. She bruised easily anyway, and her pale complexion made it more obvious than it would have been if she was even slightly tanned. "I was wondering if you could enlighten me as to which woman on your Facebook is the one who received the gift of your heart last night?"Trixie groaned, pulling the waste paper bin from the side of her bed towards her, just in case."I didn't? Did I?"."I can assure you that you did Trix, 170 photos on Facebook, and I've counted 5 different women so far. Not including the one I found you with, Kate I think her name was. It appears she was the sober guardian angle of the night, judging from how she dealt with you, and that she appears in multiple photos trying to keep you all upright."Trixie and Patsy spent the next hour going through Trixie's Facebook, trying to track down the women who appeared in the photos, struggling to identify anyone behind the many layers of rainbow facepaint. It was when they reached the 57th photo that Trixie's heart sank. Her. The Woman. Trixie's heart fell to the soles of her feet when she realised that she couldn't remember her name, or anything about her. No, there was something that she remembered, to woman's well spoken but distinctive Liverpudlian accent. Trixie breathed a sigh of relief, she might never find her woman again, but at least they had talked before Trixie had decided that she loved her. The same woman appeared in most of the rest of the photos, including the last few, where she could just about be made out to be the woman collapsed in a corner, with someone trying to administer first aid, whilst Kate propped Trixie up.Trixie realised that whoever this woman was, she couldn't have been quite as experienced with drink as she was. She'd drank more and more, going along with whatever Trixie was drinking, and Trixie had drank a lot (she was already dreading discovering her bank balance). It was Patsy who had got excited about seeing the last few pictures, although she had tried to hide it. The other woman in the picture, the one dealing with Trixie's drunk associate, was Delia. Her Delia! Patsy decided not to mention it, but made a note of it, knowing that if Trixie really did want to track down whoever it was that she was with last night, Delia might be able to help them out. Delia seemed to do an awful lot of helping out.Patsy decided that the best course of action now would be to leave Trixie to continue sleeping off her hangover, coming in every hour or so to provide her with more water and check that she was still okay (the trip to Pride had fortunately fallen so that neither woman would be working the next day). Patsy did worry about her dearest friend a lot, every time she opened the door in the next few hours, she was afraid of how she would find her friend. Worst case scenario, she would be blue in the face, having asphyxiated on her own vomit. They were both lucky that she had never come to significant harm, although the same could not be said for her liver. It was the early evening, when Patsy knocked on Trixie's door to announce that she would be making dinner, and that their next door neighbour would be paying a visit the next day, that Patsy found Trixie sat in a crumpled heap, sobbing uncontrollably. Patsy knelt beside her friend, pulling her towards her, stroking her back gently, encouraging her to breath in time with her, calming her down. "This is too much Patsy". Patsy immediately knew what her friend meant, and she was glad she had finally realised that drinking like this wasn't healthy."I can get someone to help you Trixie, there are people who can help you. You can stop all of this." Patsy hugged her friend tighter as she spoke. "You aren't alone Trixie, I'm here."Trixie let out another sob before she tried to speak again. She hadn't planned on this conversation happening, but she knew that she had to talk to someone, and she knew that Patsy would know what she needed to do. Sat on the floor with her best friend, she felt safe, but she knew that this was as hard for Patsy to deal with as it was for herself. "I don't know how to stop. I'm scared. Without alcohol, I'm not me, I have to put up a front, it takes at least 3 drinks for me to be able to socialise."Patsy wanted to argue with Trixie, and tell her that she was friendly, and people loved her even when she was sober, but she knew what her friend meant. They had each other, but to almost everyone else, they had to spend every waking moment keeping up a mask of pleasant friendliness, even when they were both crumbling inside. Patsy coped by absorbing herself in her work, or cleaning their house. Trixie coped by drinking until she was concurrently numb to her emotions, and free to express them. She knew that Trixie needed someone (other than herself, they had been friends for too many years now) to prove to her that they appreciated her, even when she was sober. Later that night, when Patsy was finally alone, she planned out what she needed to do the next morning. Firstly, she needed to get hold of the details for the local Alcoholics Anonymous group, and pass them on to Trixie, discreetly including the phone number of a counsellor that Patsy knew would be a good person for her friend to talk to. Secondly, she needed to text Delia. Patsy had wanted to text her all day, but had been preoccupied by her worry for Trixie. Now she had two reasons to text her, she wanted to meet her again, and she needed to pick her brains for any way that they might be able to track down the woman Trixie met last night. If they could find her, maybe she would be able to convince Trixie that she could socialise without alcohol.
|
10517784
|
Couldnt Say No
|
{
"Archive Warning": null,
"Category": "M/M",
"Characters": "Sam Winchester, Dean Winchester",
"Fandom": "Supernatural",
"Language": "English",
"Rating": "Mature",
"author": "by belovedhell (orphan_account)",
"chapters": "1/1",
"completed": "",
"published": "2017-04-01T00:00:00",
"words": "1,207",
"Additional Tags": "Suicidal Thoughts, Dubious Consent, Self-Hatred, Forced Orgasm, Dark, Heavy Angst, No Romance, Sibling Incest, Violent Thoughts, Hurt Dean Winchester, Top Sam, Unhappy Ending, Guilt, Realization, Implied/Referenced Alcohol Abuse/Alcoholism, Emotionally Hurt Dean, Sam Didn't Know, Unrequited Love",
"Relationship": "Dean Winchester/Sam Winchester",
"Character": null,
"Relationships": null,
"Series": null,
"Collections": null,
"Fandoms": null,
"Archive Warnings": "Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, Underage Sex",
"Categories": null,
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"Chapters": null,
"Comments": null,
"Completed": null,
"Hits": null,
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"Words": null,
"Updated": null
}
|
Dean could never say no to Sam, his baby brother that he raised as an infant. Not even when Sam wanted to be more than brothers. When he asked for a kiss when he was fourteen, Dean reluctantly obliged, leaning over and kissing him on his not so innocent lips.Sam made the brightest smile that Dean had ever seen. Dean wanted Sam to smile like that all the time, making it a reason why Dean wouldn't reject Sam. His baby brother was his whole world and had always gave him whatever he wanted.Therefore, kissing became their thing for a while, until Sam started to crave more.Sam got possessive with him and wanted more than Dean was willing to offer. Yet, Dean still couldn't say no. He just followed Sam's lead. The kisses got longer and got rougher. It was like Sam was taking his breath away, literally.It was Dean's job to take care of his brother, therefore he made sure their dad was never around. Dean felt like a sick son of a bitch every time he and Sam did something in the dark. Dean would tense when Sam wrapped his arms around him and his tongue was down his throat. He never got used to the feeling.When Sam turned fifthteen... he got a bit aggressive. He began to leave marks on Dean's body: neck, collarbone, thighs. Everywhere. Sam bit until skin was broken, enough to last for days. Dean knew why he was doing it, because he wanted everybody to know that he belonged to Sam only.Dean still didn't tell him to stop.When Sam turned sixteen he asked to suck on his dick and see Dean naked. Dean hesitated, but when Sam gave him a pleading expression. He said yes. As Sam pulled down his pants and boxers, Dean bit his lips, harsh, as he felt Sam's tongue on his cock. Dean didn't moan, instead he shut his eyes and gripped onto the bed sheets.He came much to his disgust.After that, Sam caressed his torso and rutted against his hips. Dean had to convince Sam that they should wait for sex until Sam was eighteen. And to Dean's joy, Sam agreed. They did nothing but blowjobs and handjobs for a whole year. Dean never once got on his knees for Sam. Thank god.When Sam got around seventeen, things took a turn for the worse. He asked Dean if he could finger him— no penetration whatsoever— as Sam said. Just enough to get Dean loose and used to the feeling. Not that Dean ever would.Again, he didn't say no to Sam.That day Dean cried, not in pain, but because he couldn't say no to Sam. No matter how hard he tried. Sam's fingers were cold and uncomfortable as they entered him, not even all the lube Sam used couldn't make him feel better. Once Dean came— due to stimulation— he rolled off the bed and padded towards the restroom. It was the first time he cried.Dean had gone numb after that. He felt like a piece of him died. And yet, he couldn't reject Sam. A part of him started to blame himself. Dean didn't smile anymore or even went out to bars. He just sat on the couch and stare at nothing, wondering where life was going for him.Their dad never noticed a damn thing. Dean didn't know whether to be grateful or disappointed in his father.Dean started to eat less and drink more. It would be Sam's eighteen birthday soon, and he had to be prepared for what was coming. There were times that Dean thought about ending it all. Thought about putting a bullet into his mouth. Every time his dad left a gun on the table Dean was tempted to grab it.One time as he held the gun in his hand, Sam had walked into the room. Dean for a second thought about shooting Sam dead right there— the dark thought made him drop the gun in horror. How could he even think about doing such a thing? Killing his brother?Dean ran to the restroom and threw up the remaining alcohol. Dean never wanted to pick up a gun again.When Sam turned eighteen, Dean let it happen. He resembled like a rag doll as he looked at the ceiling above in a trance. Dean zoned out. It was as if his subconscious slipped away as it happened. There was no pain, no relief... nothing. Dean wondered if his mind was breaking down, or was trying to save him. Either way, Dean hated it.Dean was brought back to reality as he felt a hand on his cheek. He glanced at Sam with slanted eyes and a blank look. And for the first time Dean saw that Sam was sobbing and apologizing, saying the words "I'm sorry, Dean" over and over again. Then he cried out, "Why didn't you push me away if I was hurting you?"It was an obvious answer. "Because I couldn't say no to you," Dean replied, with no emotion in his tone. It dawned to Dean that Sam was asking him about right now, not about all the other times. It was a mistake that slipped out.Then Dean felt Sam backing away from him like he was hit by a bucket of cold water. Sam covered his mouth at the realization. It finally occurred to Dean that Sam had no idea he hated it. He had never once voiced his opinion and simply did what Sam wanted because Dean never once said no."Sam—""All those times! I thought you were nervous so I went slow and waited until I was eighteen," Sam shouted, "It was because I was molesting you... and today," Sam shakily let out a huff as he finished, "I-I was raping you.""You weren't raping me," Dean snapped. "I wanted it." He said yes every time. Sam was never forcing him against his will.Sam shook his head. "You didn't want it, Dean. You just allowed it to happen. N-No more. I won't ever touch you again." Sam picked up his clothes and started to put them on in a hurry.Dean should be relieved that it was over, their fucked up incestuous relationship. Yet, he saw the way Sam was acting, something he knew too well. Guilt. Before Dean could tell him something, Sam left the motel room, never once glancing back at him.It was until two weeks later that Dean found Sam's letter to Stanford. Sam packed everything that was his and left without saying goodbye. All that he left was a note for Dean saying: I'm sorry for everything.The other half of Dean's heart broke. If he hadn't told Sammy the truth he would still be right next to him. Dean saw the date of the letter when he found it. It was from two months ago.If Sam had been thinking of going to Stanford... that would mean he was planning on asking Dean to come with him. Dean was certain that if Sam had asked him before he would have said yes.Because he couldn't say no to Sam.
|
10555832
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youre a god i am not
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{
"Archive Warning": "No Archive Warnings Apply",
"Category": "M/M",
"Characters": "Jeff \"Swoops\" Troy, Kent Parson, Swoops (Check Please!), Original Characters",
"Fandom": "Check Please! (Webcomic)",
"Language": "English",
"Rating": "Explicit",
"author": "by staunchly_anonymous",
"chapters": "62/?",
"completed": "",
"published": "2017-04-06T00:00:00",
"words": "55,619",
"Additional Tags": "Unresolved Romantic Tension, Unrequited Love, Parental Death, Sports related injury, Religion, Recreational Drug Use, Mutual Pining, Requited Unrequited Love",
"Relationship": null,
"Character": null,
"Relationships": "Kent \"Parse\" Parson/Jeff \"Swoops\" Troy, Eric \"Bitty\" Bittle/Kent \"Parse\" Parson",
"Series": "the mixtapes",
"Collections": null,
"Fandoms": null,
"Archive Warnings": null,
"Categories": null,
"Bookmarks": null,
"Chapters": null,
"Comments": null,
"Completed": null,
"Hits": null,
"Kudos": null,
"Published": null,
"Words": null,
"Updated": null
}
|
Jeff threw himself onto Kent’s sofa, propping his feet up on the coffee table. “I ordered Chinese!” he called, assuming his voice would carry up the stairs. “And we’re watching 2 Fast 2 Furious !”“No, dude! We talked about this! I don’t want to watch that shit!” Kent came down his stairs, rubbing at his damp hair with a towel. He was wearing that Samwell Hockey shirt that Jeff half wished he didn’t have and half wished he wore constantly because of how tight it was. “Pick something else, man. Anything.”“Anything?” Jeff grinned.“No,” said Kent, throwing his towel at Jeff’s face. “You know what I mean.” He ducked into the kitchen.“So you want to watch The Great Mouse Detective again, eh?”“I like The Great Mouse Detective ,” Kent said, throwing himself down on the sofa next to Jeff. He leaned his head back against the cushions, closing his eyes and settling a cold can of sparkling water on them. They’d had a particularly tiring practice that day, and Kent always worked too hard as it was. “What did you order?”“I picked stuff at random,” Jeff said, draping Kent’s towel back over his blond head.Kent cracked an eye. “You did not.”“Yeah, who knows what you’re gonna get? It could be anything!” Jeff stretched his arms up over his head. “Maybe I got you egg foo yung. Or those cream cheese crab things. You like those, right?”Kent turned his head to look at Jeff.“Fine,” Jeff said, letting his arm rest across the back of the sofa. “I got General Tso’s chicken. And some fried rice. And lo mein.”“Was that so hard?” Kent asked.“I’m turning on 2 Fast 2 Furious ,” Jeff said.“Don’t,” Kent said, and it was a bit of a whine.They were halfway through The Great Mouse Detective when Kent’s weight sagged against Jeff’s side. His head was propped on Jeff’s shoulder and when Jeff turned to look at him, he sighed. Fast asleep, like usual. Kent’s eyelashes were dark gold against his skin. Jeff sighed.Kent always fell asleep watching movies. He never intended to, but Jeff knew how this worked. There was a reason he had a spare toothbrush in Kent’s guest bathroom cabinet and a drawer in the guest room. Spending the night at Kent’s place just kind of seemed to… happen. It wasn’t unusual at all for him to stay over and wake up in the morning to go running with Kent before practice.Shifting, he redistributed Kent’s weight a little, settling him against his side in a less neck-pain-inducing way. Dragging a blanket off the back of the sofa, he smoothed it over both their laps before switching the television over to American Pickers.He was such an idiot.There was a time when Jeff thought he was pining after straight golden-boy Parson, a time when he thought that he’d be lucky if he could just manage to actually be friends with him for real. That was before he’d realized that Kent was gay, and way before he’d watched Kent fall in love with someone else. It was hard not to wonder what could’ve happened if Jeff had just found the courage to say something. It was harder to watch the warm smiles Kent gave his phone when texting.It was hardest when he was curled up on Kent’s sofa with the warm weight of him pressed against his side. It was only a ghost, Jeff imagined, of what actually being Kent’s boyfriend would feel like, of what an actual life with him would be.It hurt.
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
“Given what happened with the Zimmermann boy,” Christopher was saying, “they thought it’d be best to have him live with an older player.”
“Oh, you know I don’t mind,” Bethany said. “We have room, and I could use another set of hands. And I feel bad for him, a little.”
“You guys are keeping a rookie?” Jeff asked, poking his head around the corner. It had to be Parson, since Zimmermann was mentioned. It wasn’t unusual for a rookie to live with an established player, but Christopher had a wife and three kids. They never asked him.
“Just for now,” said Bethany, glancing his way.
“Because of the --”
“Yes, Jeff,” Christopher said.
“You should try to come over and help him out,” Bethany added. “I’m sure he’d appreciate it.”
“Yeah, yeah.” Jeff grinned. “I’ll help him out. No sweat.”
Christopher and Bethany converted the office in their home to a bedroom -- after all, neither of them really used it. It was upstairs and down a hallway, which Bethany thought Kent would appreciate because it’d separate him from the kids a little. Jeff helped pick furniture for it, deciding to just… decorate with navy blue and grey because it was easy and simple. Nobody could fault a plain room like that.
Kent arrived on a Thursday. It was hot, summer in Las Vegas, and when he met them at the airport, he was in jeans. Everyone had agreed not to ask him about the draft or the Q at first, mostly because Bethany was convinced it’d be too awkward and Chris… well, Chris almost always sided with Bethany about everything.
Julianna had wanted to make a sign for Kent so he’d know it was them. Jeff agreed it was a good idea, but when it came down to helping her
make
said sign, it turned into stick figures and a little drawing of Christopher’s house and a diagram of the family that said HI KENT right in the middle. There was glitter involved. It was not a very professional banner. In fact, when they stood together at the airport, Jeff felt a bit… nervous, looking over at Julianna and her proud, bright smile.
Kent was easily recognizable. He rounded a corner and spotted them immediately. He was quick to smile, heading for their little group while adjusting the duffel bag on his shoulder.
“Oh, wow,” he said, stopping in front of the banner, “is this for me?”
“I made it,” said Julianna.
Kent grinned down at her, his smile warm. “Yeah? I must be
really
special,” he said. “I wish someone would’ve told me I was gonna be met at the airport by royalty.”
All Jeff’s nerves melted away.
Kent thanked them for meeting him, introduced himself politely, insisted he could carry his own things -- but he did let Julianna carry his hat after she asked. The flight from New York was long, and he was clearly tired. He stared out the window the entire ride back to the house. When they arrived, he followed Jeff up the stairs. When they stepped through the door into the room that would belong to Kent for at least a year, Kent sort of… stared.
“It used to be the office,” Jeff said, because he didn’t know what else to say. There was a desk, chair, and full size bed in the room, but not much else. It had a closet already. It was a relatively bare space, but it was clean and had large windows on one side.
“I hope you don’t mind,” Bethany said, shifting the baby on her hip, “it’s not the biggest room we have, but --”
“It’s great,” Kent said. He set his bag on the bed. “Thank you.”
“Hopefully the kids won’t be too loud,” Jeff said.
“I like kids,” said Kent. “It’s no trouble. I appreciate you letting me stay here, really.”
“Don’t worry about it,” Christopher said. “Besides, you can take Jeff off our hands and we’ll all be thankful for that.”
“Hey!”
Kent laughed. “I have a feeling we’ll be busy, anyway,” he said.
“You will,” said Bethany.
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
Jeff stuck close to Kent, figuring that's what 'helping him out' meant.Granted, they weren’t the same age, because Jeff was coming to the Aces with a degree from Boston University, but still. They were new together. They’d be practicing together a lot, and everyone knew Parson had gone first in the draft. While Jeff had been expecting to play hockey with Jack Zimmermann, nobody could deny that Parson was a good player in his own right.In fact, Kent Parson was truly gifted when it came to hockey. He was fast and intuitive and really, really good at getting his teammates the puck. He worked hard, stayed late, gave his all. He was constantly working on speed. His shots were beautiful. He was beautiful -- not that Jeff noticed.Jeff and Kent integrated into the team with ease, both of them quickly agreeing to nights out with the other guys. There were only a few awkward moments where someone asked Kent about Zimmermann and he seemed to freeze for a half second, but once he’d declined to talk about it a few times, everyone quit asking. Kent deflected questions with humor at a pace Jeff envied, managed to say the right thing or change the subject whenever he wanted. He was always laughing and grinning at the right times, and he joked around with the guys easily. He was a people person, sort of -- a guy’s guy, or at least a tame version of one. Kent had partying down to an art, always stopping after one drink but making it seem like he’d had more, something Jeff had figured out only by accidentally getting Kent’s tab at a bar. Staring down at the bill, Jeff frowned, coming to a realization all at once. Everything about Kent was crafted.He wasn’t a people person, not really, even though he always pretended otherwise. He didn’t really like parties, he didn’t like drinking, and he never, ever, ever invited anyone out first. At Christopher’s house Kent was quiet and polite and very clean. He listened to top 40 pop music. He read books, played guitar, had a picture of him and Zimmermann in the Q by his bed, and did chores for Christopher without being asked. He played with the kids, cooked dinner, and went to church every single Sunday. On roadies he usually just listened to music, tended to fall asleep easily, and he hated having the hotel bathroom door shut.And he had nightmares. Awful, screaming ones. The first time he woke Jeff up on a roadie, he’d thought Kent was dying. Hearing it quickly dismissed as just a dream didn’t sit well with him, but Kent refused to discuss it. He bought Jeff a pair of earplugs from a pharmacy, presenting them to him without comment.Jeff thought things were going just fine.Kent answered the door one Monday with baby Oliver on his hip. His hair was messy and he had his glasses on. “Hey! I volunteered us for babysitting duty. You don’t care, do you?”Jeff sucked in a quick breath. Why did his stomach hurt all of a sudden?Oliver babbled, tugging at Kent’s shirt collar. “I know, buddy,” he said, turning away.Jeff followed Kent into the house. “No, I don’t mind,” he said. He loved Christopher’s kids. Being an uncle was one of his favorite things in the world. He just hadn’t expected d’you wanna hang out on Monday to be babysitting.Not that Christopher and Bethany didn’t deserve a date night. And, as it turned out, chilling at home and watching the kids with Kent was… really fun. They cooked dinner and played with the kids and when the baby was fussy, Kent settled on the sofa with him and watched cartoons. It was easy. Comfortable. Kent asked Jeff quiet, thoughtful questions about his early childhood education degree and paid attention to his answers. Once they’d put the kids to bed, they played rock paper scissors over what movie to watch and when it ended up being Kent’s pick, he chose The Little Mermaid .Jeff began to spend more and more time at Christopher’s house. The more time he spent with Kent at home, the more Kent seemed to relax around him, and it showed on the ice. They played very well together, and soon Jeff realized that he was almost always on the same line with Kent. They were having… a pretty great first season in the NHL.After their third straight win on a roadtrip, Jeff and some of the guys decided to celebrate their clinching a spot in playoffs. They had two days off between games, so it wouldn’t be a problem. “C’mon, Kenny,” Jeff said, pulling on a jacket. Maybe a drink or two would help Kent sleep. “Let’s go.”“Don’t call me that,” Kent said. “And thanks, but I’m fine -- I’m just gonna chill.”“Dude, I’m allowed to celebrate,” Jeff said, frowning. “And so are you. Lighten up, Parse, fuck.”“This is why I always beat your ass at practice,” Kent said. “No self control.” He grinned.“You do not --” Jeff paused, realizing Kent was doing it again, changing the subject as easily as breathing. “Look, man, why don’t you ever want to come out?”“I go out,” Kent said. “I just don’t want to tonight. It’s no big deal.” He shrugged.Jeff shook his head. “Whatever, it’s fine. I just --” I wanted you to come. “-- Didn’t want you to feel left out.”“Thanks for the invitation,” Kent said.Jeff threw a pillow at him. “Fine. I’ll be back later.”When he returned, hours later and several drinks deep, Jeff brought a blonde girl back to the hotel with him. She was nice and laughed at his jokes and yeah, she probably just knew that he was a professional athlete and he wouldn’t remember her name tomorrow, but if she didn’t care, why should he? “Hey man, you wanna --?”The unspoken get the fuck out was obvious.“Yeah,” Kent said, glancing to the girl, no doubt realizing she was entirely different than the one the night before. “Have fun.” He grabbed a pillow slipped out the door, heading for Christopher’s room, most likely.Jeff tried not to think about Kent Parson while he had another blonde’s mouth on his dick.It didn’t work.
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
“You wanna talk about it?” Jeff asked, awake at two am because of Kent’s screaming. Again. Jeff sat up, rubbing the back of his head.“No,” Kent said. He was sitting up in bed, one hand pressed to his forehead.Jeff frowned, flipping on the lamp. “Dude, I’m -- you know you do this all the time, right?”Kent glanced at him, frowning. “What?”“I just mean, you know, I’m a light sleeper and you do this a lot. I mean, it’s been going on for months now? And I’m not gonna judge you or whatever, like if you’re embarrassed about whatever you keep dreaming about it’s okay, but like --”“I’m not embarrassed about it,” Kent said, cutting Jeff off. “I just don’t want to talk about it. Okay?”He never wanted to talk about it. They’d spent almost an entire year not talking about it. Jeff shook his head. So embarrassed was the wrong word choice. Noted. “Okay, but --”“If you want a different roommate the rest of the season I understand,” Kent said. He wouldn’t look Jeff in the eyes. “Sorry I’m keeping you up. I didn’t mean to. I’ll, um. I’ll ask if you want.”That wasn’t at all what Jeff wanted. With playoffs fast approaching, changing room assignments would mess up an entire team of superstitious hockey players. Not to mention taking away Jeff's favorite part of being on the road. “No,” he said. “That’s not what I meant.”Kent gave him a tight-lipped smile.The tense silence between them settled into Jeff’s stomach, heavy and tight. He ran a hand over his hair again, scrubbing at his scalp for a second. What could he do? How could he make this better? Kent dodged it every time Jeff tried to talk to him about it.Jeff sighed. “Scoot over,” he said, after a moment.“What?”Grabbing the remote, Jeff left his bed for Kent’s, perching on the edge of the mattress. Kent hadn’t moved a centimeter. He switched the television on and pushed at Kent’s side. “C’mon.”Kent scooted over, a frown on his face. “What are you doing?”“We’re watching Lifetime, dude,” Jeff said. “Shut it.” The movie on Lifetime was Odd Girl Out , and he leaned back against the headboard of the bed after scooting in under the comforter. Glancing at Kent, he bumped their bare shoulders together for a second. “Hey.”“What?”“You wanna raid the vending machine?”Kent’s smile was slow, shy. “Yeah,” he said.They ended up with a pile of chips, two sodas, three kinds of chocolate, and one package of fruit snacks. Kent stole the fruit snacks out of the pile first, and they had a small argument over which kind of brown soda was superior, with Kent winning the right to drink the actual Coca-Cola they’d purchased. Jeff settled for Pepsi and a Snickers and running commentary on the Lifetime movie.Kent made it halfway through Odd Girl Out before falling asleep, curled up against the pillows. Jeff shifted, glancing at Kent. His lashes were long, dark gold against his skin. Jeff lifted a hand to brush a bit of hair off Kent’s forehead before pulling it back, sucking in a quick breath. Bad idea.Jeff turned the television off, scooting a little lower in the bed. “G’night,” he said, just before shutting the lamp off. Kent hadn’t moved. Jeff crossed his arms over his chest, closing his eyes. They both slept through the rest of the night.Neither of them mentioned it in the morning.It made the playoffs much more bearable. Jeff quit asking Kent what his nightmares were about, and Kent quit pretending he didn’t have them. When it happened, they just turned the television on and sat close, but not too close, watching something awful until Kent fell asleep. While it made the remaining roadies much nicer, it did nothing for the tightness in Jeff’s stomach when he looked at Kent.In fact, it was kind of making it worse.
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
Jeff turned the bar over, looking at the label. 30 grams, he needed 30 grams of carbohydrates for one hour of exercise. He’d have to pack for practice, like always. Tossing the bar into his bag, he set his insulin pump on the counter and went upstairs to find Kent.
“You have a lot of food in that bag,” Kent said, leaning over.
“Yep,” said Jeff. “Gotta.”
“What, you’ll starve before practice lets out?” Kent laughed.
“I’m a type I diabetic,” Jeff said, slinging his bag over his shoulder. “C’mon, we gotta go.”
Kent frowned. “And they let you play?”
“My bloodwork’s probably better than yours,” Jeff said, “and -- obviously.” Hadn’t Kent seen him eating during practice a bunch of times already? He’d definitely gotten a bunch of questions from other guys about what the fuck he was doing when he checked his sugar on the bench.
“I’m sorry,” Kent said, two seconds later, following Jeff out to his car, “I was just a dick to you, wasn’t I?”
“Little bit.” Jeff tossed his bag into the backseat. “Get in, we’re gonna be late.”
“We’re not gonna be late.” Kent threw himself into the front seat.
When he was a kid, figuring out the whole insulin and blood sugar situation in first grade was frustrating. Jeff remembered hating the nurse who taught him how to give himself insulin, and hating the doctor, too. By the time he was in high school, he’d tied it to his performance on the ice, and he’d become meticulous. In college, he’d educated the coaches as well as his teammates about what he needed, and everything worked out just fine.
At the combine, when being evaluated by the endocrinologist, Jeff spent forever in a time-consuming and somewhat circular conversation, becoming more and more worried by the minute that they wouldn’t clear him to play in the NHL. His numbers were great. Hell, he had a better hemoglobin A1C than lots of people who
weren’t
diabetic.
Being cleared to move forward was a weight off his shoulders -- but the thought that teams might not want to take him because of his diagnosis hovered constantly in the back of Jeff’s mind. It would certainly make sense, regardless of how conscientious Jeff was, regardless of how hard he worked. In the end, when the Aces drafted him, he’d decided he didn’t care
who
he played for.
It was the first moment that Jeff could remember really wanting, more than anything else, to be an NHL player.
“So…” Kent nudged Jeff’s arm. “You’re being weird, today. I’m sorry, all right? I wasn’t trying to be a dick to you, I can’t believe I didn’t notice before, and --”
“It’s fine,” Jeff said, glancing at him. “Seriously. Sorry, I was just… thinking.”
“Sounds dangerous,” said Kent. When Jeff glanced at him again, he was grinning.
“Whatever,” Jeff said.
After that, Kent was always hovering somewhere on the edges of Jeff’s awareness, checking in with him if he hadn’t seen him eat recently. When Jeff accidentally forgot to take his pump off before a game, Kent had spare things in his bag. He always kept food around, trying to frame it in a coincidental way, but --
Well, Jeff tried not to think too much of it, but it was nice, somehow, knowing that he was on Kent’s mind.
Even if it was just his blood sugar. And if Jeff hugged Kent just a
little
longer than everyone else, well. It was just because he appreciated the concern.
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
“Hey,” Kent said. They’d just gotten back to the house after an afternoon at the children’s hospital with several other team members. “What’s wrong?”
Jeff turned to look at him. “What?”
Kent tilted his head. “What’s wrong?” he repeated.
“I --” Jeff hadn’t said anything, he was sure of it.
It was stupid, anyway. He didn’t have any right to be so upset after visiting those kids in the hospital. They loved it when the Aces came, anyway. It made them happy. And Jeff should be happy because
they
were happy, it was just --
It was just that it hurt so
bad
.
Kent hadn’t said anything. He was just waiting, looking at Jeff with soft brown eyes.
“It’s stupid,” Jeff said, after a minute. He looked down at his hands.
Kent sat next to him on Christopher’s sofa. “I’m upset about stupid stuff all the time,” he said.
That brought a small smile to Jeff’s face. “It’s just --” he paused. Fuck, no matter how he said it, he’d sound pathetic. It was so, so stupid. “It’s just seeing those kids.” He took a breath.
“It’s sad,” Kent supplied.
“Yeah, but --” Jeff shook his head. That wasn’t it. It wasn’t enough to describe how tight his throat felt, the ache in his chest. He hated visiting the hospital.
And he hated himself for that, for being so selfish.
“It’s not fair,” he said, after a minute. “To be so upset about it.” After all, Jeff didn’t have to live with it, did he? His reality was hockey and money and living his life how he wanted. He could walk out of the hospital and leave it behind. Those kids and their families -- they lived with it every day. Jeff swallowed, shutting his eyes against the burn of tears. Damnit. He pressed his hands to his face.
Kent scooted a little closer before he slid an arm around Jeff’s shoulder, leaning in to hug him. Jeff didn’t know how long they sat like that, Kent just holding him and both of them ignoring the tears. After a while, Jeff sniffed, scrubbing his wrist across his eyes.
“Okay?” Kent asked, voice soft.
“Okay,” Jeff said.
Kent pulled away just a little. He rubbed Jeff’s shoulder. “Cool,” he said. “All right.”
“Sorry,” Jeff said. He rubbed his face again, letting out a soft laugh. “I probably just need to eat or something.”
Smiling, Kent stood up. “How about macaroni and cheese?” he asked, and Jeff laughed for real.
“Sure,” he said. “Sounds great.”
Later, when Jeff was pulling on his shoes to go home, Kent leaned in the doorway, hands in his pockets. “Hey,” he said, just as Jeff stood up to leave.
“Yeah?” Jeff fished in his pocket for his keys.
“I think, um. I think it’s great, you know,” Kent said. “Having a big heart. It’s one of my favorite things about you.”
Jeff laughed. “Yeah,” he said, “thanks, man.”
Kent gave him a shy, soft smile. “See you tomorrow?”
“‘Course,” Jeff said. “See you tomorrow.”
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
Sitting on his bathroom floor, Jeff frowned at his phone. Should he text Christopher? It wasn’t like he couldn’t take care of himself. He didn’t need Christopher. It was just a stomach bug, and he had Gatorade and maple syrup and stuff in the apartment. Plus, Christopher had so much to deal with anyway.Leaning his head back against the bathroom wall, Jeff sighed. Rubbing at his forehead, he grimaced when his hand came away sweaty. Ugh . That was the last time he’d eat sushi in a landlocked area, that was for sure. Not that he could be sure it was the sushi, because he was going on day two of this ridiculousness, and that probably made it a virus --Swallowing, Jeff looked at his phone again. The screen was shaking. He typed in the passcode and opened messages, writing one out quickly.
will you come get me
Christopher’s response took a few minutes to appear. yeah why r u ok Stomach virus . Jeff set his phone down again, leaned forward to rest his forehead against his knees.
How long?
Started yesterday. thought i was fine this morning bt i bolused for lunch and didnt keep it
I’ll be right there.
He should probably rub maple syrup or honey on the inside of his cheeks while waiting, but the kitchen was so far away . Taking a slow breath, Jeff shut his eyes. It’d only be a little bit, right? It was fine. His heart was racing, and he took another breath. It was fine. It was fine.When his bathroom door pushed open, Jeff looked up. Christopher held out a small plastic bear full of honey.“C’mon, bud,” he said. “Let’s get to the hospital. Did you check ketones?”Jeff shook his head. He should have checked them, but he had been a bit… occupied, honestly.“That’s okay,” Christopher said, “that’s all right. C’mon.”Kent pushed into the bathroom behind Christopher, holding a pair of Jeff’s shoes. “I got some shoes,” he said, as if they couldn’t see them. What was he doing there?Jeff looked back up at Christopher, who shrugged. “He was kind of freaking out,” he said. “I figured I’d better bring him.”After putting honey in his mouth, Jeff shoved his feet into his shoes and followed Kent out to the car. Christopher made sure their seatbelts were on before heading for the hospital.Kent was quiet in the car, glancing over at Jeff with wide, worried eyes when he thought Jeff wouldn’t see. What was his deal?“I’m gonna be fine,” Jeff said, even though his stomach was churning. Fuck, was there a plastic sack or something in Christopher’s car? He didn’t want to throw up on the seat --Kent put a hand on Jeff’s shoulder when he bent over, coughing into a grocery sack. There wasn’t anything in his stomach any more.Sometimes, when he went to a hospital, the doctor he saw was familiar with type I diabetes. Sometimes, not so much. This time, they did normal things like IV fluids and a medication for nausea, but the doctor said Jeff’s test wasn’t positive for ketones.“Are you sure?” Christopher was in full dad-mode. It was irritating as fuck .The doctor said he was going to consult endocrinology, and Jeff closed his eyes, dropping his head back against the table. Christopher sounded pissed, said he wanted somebody else, and eventually a different doctor came in, informing them they’d misread the results and --Jeff wound up admitted to the hospital. Once he was in the room, safely tucked into a bed, Christopher got on the phone to let the team know what was going on. Jeff rolled onto his side, pressing his face against the pillow. At least whatever they’d given him had stopped the vomiting.By the time he woke up, the room was dark. Pushing up onto one elbow, Jeff looked around for the clock. It was evening, close to dinner time. Kent still sat in the chair next to him, staring. He’d stayed ? Why? Jeff blinked. Kent perked up when Jeff looked at him.“Hi,” Jeff said, after a minute.“Hi,” Kent said. It looked like he’d been twisting some kind of paper? between his fingers. His lower lip was a bit red from biting. Being in the hospital seemed to be really stressful for him. Maybe he just... didn’t do hospitals? Bad experience? Either way, he looked exhausted.“Where’s Christopher?” Jeff asked, glancing around, then back to Kent. “Did you stay this whole time?”“Oh, uh. He had to go home for a little bit,” Kent said. He hunched his shoulders, looking down at his hands. “I can, um. I mean I said I’d stay, and he’ll be back, so --”No need to keep going. He wasn’t upset that Kent stayed or anything. “Okay,” Jeff said. “Thank you.” It was nice of him.Kent’s head snapped back up, eyes wide. “Oh -- uh, you’re welcome,” he said, after a minute.Jeff smiled and then turned his head, looking for the bedside table. “Do I have any water in here?”Later, with the TV on and at least a bit of apple juice kept down, Jeff glanced at Kent. He hadn’t stopped staring yet. It was weird. “Hey, man. You okay?”“Yeah,” Kent said, quickly. “I’m fine. I’m -- fine.”Jeff frowned. Maybe Kent just didn’t like hospitals or something? “You’re like… staring at me, though,” he said. Reaching out, Jeff ruffled Kent’s hair with one hand. “Hey. I’m gonna be okay. This is no big deal, it’s just a stomach virus or something. I’m more worried about the manager thinking they wasted a draft pick on me, anyway --”“Nobody thinks that!”Jeff laughed. “Yeah,” he said, “okay.”Kent smiled a nervous little smile. “So you’ll be fine?” he asked.“Yeah,” Jeff said.“Are you sure?” Kent asked.“ Kent ,” Jeff said. Jeez. What was his deal?Kent shifted in his chair. “Does this happen a lot?” he asked, after a few minutes went by.Man. He was really worried, huh? “No,” Jeff said. “Seriously, it’s just a stomach virus. I’ll be totally fine.” He glanced at his tray table. “You want my jello?”Kent blinked. “Seriously?”“I only like the green one,” Jeff said.“Oh my god,” said Kent, but his shoulders had relaxed a little.Jeff grinned, reaching out to ruffle Kent’s hair. “Tell them I want soup,” he said.Trying to brush his hair back into place, Kent ducked out from under Jeff’s hand. “ You tell them!”Jeff laughed.
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
Kent was up early. Again. Jeff groaned, rolling over.
Every Sunday, somehow, no matter what city they were in, Kent found a way to go to mass. A lot of the time he went to ridiculously early ones to fit it in around their schedule, and since Jeff was such a light sleeper, he had to listen to Kent’s attempts to get ready quietly. Sometimes, he managed okay. That was not one of those times.
Pulling his pillow over on top of his face, Jeff groaned louder. “
Parse
. Please. Why the fuck.” It was still pitch-dark out. It was so unnecessary.
“I just gotta go to mass,” Kent said. “Sorry, I didn’t mean to wake you.”
Jeff threw the pillow at him. “Get out,” he said. “Shut the light off when you go.”
He knew Kent went to mass every Sunday. Bethany had taken him before, dropping him off and picking him up without comment -- Christopher, like Jeff, had no desire to associate with the Catholic church whatsoever. They’d grown up with their grandmother’s stories about the boarding schools, with her fierce insistence that they were
native
people with their own culture and identity and that one could never, ever, ever trust a priest.
Usually, in Vegas, Kent went to church alone.
One Saturday night, in Philadelphia, Jeff was just scrolling through his phone looking for a restaurant when Kent got out of the shower.
“Hey,” Jeff said, “you wanna get dinner?”
“I’m going to mass tonight,” Kent said. “You can come with me? We can eat after.”
Kent had asked Jeff to go to mass with him before -- not often, but it had happened. And maybe it was because Jeff hadn’t slept too great the night before and maybe it was because he seriously needed to eat, but that night? That night he just couldn’t take it.
“No thanks,” he said, “I don’t believe in mythology. You have fun, though.”
“O… kay,” Kent said. “I was just asking, damn.” He shrugged his shirt on, moving to button it up.
“Maybe shouldn’t be swearing before you go to church,” Jeff said, not looking up from his phone.
“Like I’m gonna let a heathen like you tell me what to do before church,” Kent said, tone light.
Heathen. “Fuck,” Jeff said, looking up from his phone, “why are you
like
this?”
“Me?” Kent finished buttoning his shirt. “Why are
you
like this?”
What?
Jeff stared for a moment, willing himself not to completely lose his shit and start screaming. “Seriously?” he asked. “Why am I like this?”
“It’s just
church
,” Kent said, “I’m -- look, it’s fine, I won’t ask you again, but you don’t have to be a dick about it.”
He didn’t have to be a
dick
about it?
“One hundred and fifty
years
, Kent,” Jeff said, slowly. “One hundred and fifty years of residential schools. One hundred and fifty years of our kids being taken from our homes, forbidden to speak our languages, prevented from learning our culture. Do you -- do you have any
idea
what they did to our people? To those kids?”
To my family?
“I --”
“They destroy people, Kent,” Jeff said. “That’s what they do. So no, no I don’t want to come listen to some celibate priest tell me how to live my life. Okay?”
Kent took a breath. “Look,” he said, “I know that the church has some fucked up history, but it’s better now, and --”
Jeff laughed. “It’s
better
? Really?” He doubted that very much.
“Going to mass makes me happy, okay?” Kent pulled his jacket on.
Happy. Right.
Kent so obviously had issues with guilt, low self worth, doubt -- and where did he think those came from? Children that grew up with constant reminders of their inadequacy, dirtiness, and worthlessness became adults who struggled with feelings of guilt and shame, who could never feel clean, worthy, valuable, adequate, or forgiven. People who could never be at peace.
Religious indoctrination haunted people for their entire lives. It was abuse -- emotional, psychological, sometimes physical. And somehow,
somehow
, people couldn’t see it.
Kent couldn’t see it.
“I’m going,” Kent said, after the silence between them had stretched too long. “Have fun eating dinner or whatever. Try not to be such a
fucking
asshole when I come back.”
“I’m not afraid to be who I am,” Jeff said.
Kent slammed the door when he left, and Jeff winced.
He’d lied.
He was a little afraid.
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
A light knock at the door startled Jeff. Getting up, he headed for the hotel room door, yanking it open. “What --” he blinked.
Kent was standing in the hallway.
“You have a room key,” Jeff said.
“I know,” said Kent.
“It’s your room, too,” Jeff said. Why was he
knocking
? Was it because of their fight a week ago? They hadn’t discussed it, choosing instead to just go about their business and pretend it never happened. Honestly, Jeff thought everything was… mostly fine. He rubbed his forehead and stepped back, allowing Kent inside.
Kent sat on the edge of his bed, chewing his lower lip. They hadn’t talked a whole lot over the week, but Kent had those quiet periods, and Jeff hadn’t tried to drag him out to chat. “I, um.” He cleared his throat. “I wanted to apologize,” he said.
Oh.
Okay. So they were doing this now, then. Not like they had a game that night, or anything. Jeff sat on his own bed. “Me too,” he said.
“No, I -- you don’t owe me an apology, I -- I shouldn’t have said that stuff to you,” Kent said. He glanced up at Jeff before quickly looking away. “I’m sorry. I, um. I didn’t think about what I was saying and I didn’t mean to make you so mad, I didn’t --” he let out a soft sigh. He twisted his hands together, picking at his nails.
“Yeah,” said Jeff, “I know.” He rubbed the back of his neck.
“I didn’t know,” Kent said. “About the schools, and -- and stuff. I looked it up. I’m really sorry.”
“Yeah,” said Jeff, “I sort of, uh, figured that out.”
“And I didn’t mean anything by it when I called you a heathen,” Kent said, his words all coming out in a rush. “I was only joking. I didn’t think about, um. Anything. And I’m sorry.”
“It’s okay,” Jeff said. “Just don’t, y’know. Don’t do it again.” He took a breath. “Maybe don’t go around calling people heathens?”
“I know,” said Kent, “I know. I’m sorry. I really am.”
He’d said it three times, at least.
“Look, it’s
okay
, Parse,” Jeff said. Honestly, he’d been rude, too, even though he knew he was right. Kent hadn’t meant anything by it, asking him to go to mass. He probably thought it was friendly and nice. “I’m sorry I was kind of a dick when you were just asking me to go somewhere with you.”
Kent hunched his shoulders. “I won’t do it again.”
Jeff tilted his head, looking at Kent for a minute. “Yeah, man,” he said. “Okay.”
“I can, um. I can ask Coach Scott if you want a different roommate,” Kent said.
What? Frowning, Jeff glanced back up at Kent’s face, at the bitten red of his lower lip where he’d pulled at the skin with his teeth. “No,” he said. “Don’t be ridiculous. It wasn’t -- it wasn’t that big of a fight, c’mon.” Where the fuck was that coming from?
Kent nodded, but he didn’t look convinced. It was a reaction that Jeff didn’t really understand, a reaction so much bigger than the fight called for. Why?
“Was it?” Jeff asked, after a minute of watching Kent pick at a string on the comforter. “That big of a fight?”
“I don’t know,” Kent said.
Jeff sighed. “Scoot over,” he said, after a long moment of silence passed.
Kent looked up, brow furrowed. “What?”
“Scoot,” Jeff said. “
Jurassic Park
is about to come on. We’re gonna watch it. Okay?”
“O… kay.” Kent scooted over, making room for Jeff in his bed. When Jeff climbed in and settled, slinging an arm around Kent’s shoulders, Kent stiffened a little.
“It’s fine,” Jeff said. “We’re good. Okay?” He tightened his hold just a little. “We’re never gonna agree about religion, but that’s fine, yeah?”
Kent nodded, glancing at Jeff’s face. “Of course,” he said.
“Besides, this isn’t American Football. Nobody cares about that shit.” Jeff ruffled Kent’s hair. “Forget about it, yeah?” He changed the channel on the TV.
It took Kent half the movie to really relax against him, but he did.
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
“Here,” Jeff said, holding his granola bar out in Kent’s direction. It was their last flight home for the season, and everyone was tired. He and Kent were next to each other like usual, everything about traveling just one big routine, now.
Kent took it without looking. “Peanut butter?”
“Pretzel,” said Jeff, “yeah.” They both liked peanut butter the best, and Jeff was so used to Kent asking for a bite of his granola bar that he’d started just handing them over once he opened them.
“Mmm.” Kent took a giant bite and handed it back, still chewing. “It’s good.” He leaned back in his seat. They’d be taking off soon. “Hey, Jeff?”
“What?” Jeff paused, headphones halfway on his head.
“Thanks,” Kent said.
Jeff smiled. “Yeah, man,” he said. “I didn’t do anything, but you’re welcome or whatever.” He pressed ‘play’ on his iPhone, settling into his seat for the remaining hours. He fell asleep listening to Oasis.
The Aces won the Stanley Cup and Kent went back to New York for the summer.
Jeff missed him. They texted a lot, of course, both in the groupchat with the guys and otherwise, but it wasn’t the same. But it was weird, now, going to Chipotle and only getting food for himself or letting them put cheese on his burrito again because Kent wouldn’t be eating any of it. They’d both started watching
Parks and Recreation
and Kent sent him beautiful pictures from Tonawanda, but it was odd eating french fries with no one stealing some off his plate. Going running by himself in the morning wasn’t as fun as going with Kent. Their phone calls gradually lengthened, and when Jeff wasn’t out having fun with his friends he was often on the phone with Kent, just talking.
Maybe it was the fact that Jeff hadn’t mentioned Kent’s nightmares to anyone, or maybe it was just that they’d been travel and hotel buddies for their entire first season, but Jeff was starting to feel like he was getting to know Kent. Between talking about television or workouts they talked about Jeff’s life in Canada and what his family was like, which led to what Kent’s family was like. Details seemed to come from Kent at random, small things here and there, never all at once.
“My mom’s engaged,” Kent said, one night when they were talking while watching
The X Files
.
“What?” Jeff sat up on his bed.
“Yeah.” Kent sighed. “I mean, it’s fine, you know? I don’t want her to be lonely forever, or anything -- and he seems nice, I guess.”
“You guess?” Jeff rolled over onto his stomach. “Well is he nice or isn’t he?”
“I don’t think he likes m--
oh
, shit! Did you see that?” They were watching the episode about the killer clones.
“Yeah man, twins are creepy,” Jeff said, trying not to laugh. He ate a chip, crunching loudly for a minute. “And dude, that’s ridiculous,” he said. “Everybody likes you.” Well, most everyone. Kent was good at getting along with people.
“Nah.” Kent paused. “They met at church. And I think he, like. Would appreciate a nuclear family, you know?”
“No,” said Jeff. What did that mean? Wasn’t a nuclear family just two parents and the kids?
“Well, whatever,” Kent said, “it’s still weird being here. I mean it’s fine, but it’s just -- different. I guess I haven’t really lived at home in a long time. I was thinking about buying mom a nicer house.” He was quiet for a minute. “
Fuck
, I’m gonna have nightmares about this now, aren’t I?”
“Growing up is weird.” Jeff paused. Commenting on Kent’s nightmare quip didn’t seem sensitive, so he decided to skip past it. “Hey. D’you wanna come back to Vegas early?”
Kent laughed. “Why, you miss me?”
“Shut up,” Jeff said.
Yes.
“I just thought you might wanna get out of town. Y’know, with your mom’s boyfriend and all.”
“Actually,” said Kent, “I do, yeah.”
“Chris won’t mind,” Jeff said, “or you can just stay with me, if you want.”
“Okay,” Kent said. “Thanks.”
Jeff picked him up from the airport alone.
As they sat in In n Out, Kent picked fries out of Jeff’s basket, a little tuft of hair sticking out from his backwards ball cap. They’d both ordered a double-double and french fries, and Kent’s fries were gone already. He hadn’t smiled very much.
“Didn’t they feed you in New York?” Jeff asked.
“Well, yeah,” Kent said, in between bites, “but I’m trying to put weight on.”
“By eating all my fries?”
Kent leaned his chin in his hand. “You’re such a good friend.”
“You’re buying next time,” Jeff said. “And I’m getting two burgers.”
“Fine,” Kent said.
When they made it back to Jeff’s apartment, Kent threw himself down on the sofa, taking up the whole length of it. “What a long flight,” he said, closing his eyes. He’d dropped his bag by the door, wiggling out of his sneakers while doing so.
“Scoot,” Jeff said, once his shoes had joined Kent’s. Honestly! It was his apartment.
“I can’t, I’m stuck this way,” Kent said, not moving a muscle.
“Okay, suit yourself.” Jeff shrugged and then flopped down on top him, leaning back against the sofa. “Ahhh,” he sighed.
“Get off!” Kent squirmed. “You’re too heavy!”
“I’m gonna play some Call of Duty,” Jeff said, ignoring the demand. “You wanna play?”
“Oh my god! You’re so fucking heavy!” Kent attacked Jeff’s sides, attempting to tickle him. “Get off!”
They ended up wrestling for a few minutes before Kent landed on top and grabbed for the video game controller. His eyes were bright as he laughed. “Call of Duty!” he said. “Right?”
“Yeah,” said Jeff, relenting. “I’m gonna kick your ass.”
“You wish,” Kent said, cheeks pink.
Jeff smiled as his stomach wobbled just a little. “We’ll see,” he said, firmly squashing the feeling down as they turned the video game on.
He let Kent beat him in the first round.
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
“You wanna go out?”Jeff stared. Surely he heard that wrong. “What?”“Out,” Kent said, in a tone that implied he was being patient. “Do you want to go?”“Uh --” Kent never asked anyone to go out first. Maybe he wanted to start their second season off differently? “Who else is going?”“Me?”Oh. Kent was asking Jeff to go somewhere with him personally, not as a part of a group. Jeff took another breath. “Uh, yeah, man. Where do you wanna go?” There were tons of places to choose from -- it was Vegas, after all. Jeff had gone to quite a few with some of the other guys, though he couldn’t say he’d ever gotten out on the floor much.“Dancing,” Kent said. “I don’t care where, really.” When Jeff opened his mouth, Kent raised a hand. “Scratch that. I do care. No country.”Jeff laughed. Given what Kent listened to normally, he assumed they’d be looking for the clubs. Dancing wasn’t usually Jeff’s thing, mostly because he wasn’t that good at it -- but that didn’t mean he didn’t know where to go. “I got you covered,” he said. At least, he hoped he did.He’d expected Kent to dress up for going out. His game day suits were always perfect, so Jeff had assumed he’d wear something other than a pair of jeans and a t-shirt. The nicest thing Kent had on was his watch.“That’s what you’re wearing?”Kent laughed. “It’s okay to be jealous,” he said. His jeans fit perfectly, like always, and even though he was just wearing a striped t-shirt and derbies, he somehow looked… really put together. More put together than Jeff ever did in jeans and a t-shirt.Maybe that was just because most of Jeff’s t-shirts were band shirts? Regardless, he felt a little overdressed in his navy button-down.“You’re gonna be hot,” Kent said, eyeing the long sleeves.“I’ll be fine,” Jeff said.“Suit yourself.” Kent breezed past Jeff, heading for the garage. The clear, fresh herbal scent of his cologne lingered for just a moment, and Jeff sighed.When Kent said he wanted to go dancing, he meant it. Jeff picked a crowded place where it would be easy for them to blend in, and before he realized it, he’d lost track of Kent somewhere in the crush of people on the dance floor. Jeff didn’t know what he’d been expecting, but Kent’s dancing was definitely dirtier than he’d counted on. Kent seemed to find new partners easily, and he looked comfortable and happy. It was extremely distracting, and Jeff wasn’t sure if it was because he was still learning what kind of person Kent was or if it was something else.They met back up at a table where Kent drank water, his smile easy and warm. He’d been dancing for over an hour, while Jeff had danced maybe two songs in between people-watching. “This is fun,” he said.“Yeah, going out’s not all bad,” said Jeff. “Glad you finally picked up on that.”“Shut up,” Kent said. “One of the girls I was dancing with was telling me about a salsa place.” He reached for Jeff’s cup, his own empty already. “What is this?”“It’s jack and coke,” Jeff said.“Anyway,” Kent said, taking a quick gulp before setting it back down, “it sounds fun. You wanna go? I mean, I don’t dance salsa but think it’s just like, a Latin dancing place so it should be okay.”Jeff did not dance salsa and he definitely didn’t understand the rest of Kent’s sentence. Why would it be okay if they didn’t know how to do it? “Uh -- sure,” he said, wondering how deeply he was going to regret it in the morning.“Cool. I’ll find her,” Kent said.Jeff wondered if he was looking for the blonde or the brunette he’d been dancing with.As it turned out, Kent did know how to salsa. Or -- he knew how to do some kind of dance they were doing at La Jolla. He changed partners a bunch of times, and he looked like he was having even more fun than he’d had at the first club. After embarrassing himself once by trying to get a girl to show him some moves, Jeff ended up just sitting and drinking and watching people. When Kent finally joined him some time later, he was a bit breathless.“Where’d you learn to dance like that?” Jeff asked. Kent looked hot, and Jeff pushed a glass of water over to him.“My mom loved dancing, so I kinda grew up doing it.” Kent laughed, picking up the glass. “Why, you want me to teach you?” He tossed back a large gulp of water.Glancing out at the dance floor, Jeff watched a couple for a minute. It looked so complicated, and they were awfully close together. He flicked his gaze back to Kent’s flushed face. God. Okay. “Yeah, why not?” Jeff laughed. “I can up my celly game.”“Oh,” said Kent, “really? I mean, I will. ‘Cause you can’t dance, right?”“I never said that!” The back of Jeff’s neck was hot.Kent leaned his chin in one hand. “Yeah, you can’t dance.” He grinned again, a moment later. “I saw you with that girl. Good try, man.”Jeff rolled his eyes. “Whatever, don’t be a dick,” he said. He looked back out at the dance floor. “That blonde you were dancing with was cute,” he said.“I guess,” said Kent. He drained the water glass. “Okay. I’ll teach you how not to make a fool of yourself next time we come here, all right?” He stood, holding out a hand.“What, now? ” Jeff stared. There were several other same-sex couples dancing at the club, but --“Yeah, it’s fine,” Kent said. “It’ll be obvious I’m teaching you, anyway. Don’t worry, I know how to follow, too.”“I’m not worried,” Jeff said. Following meant the girl part, right?“Yeah, okay.” Kent grinned. “C’mon. I’ll go easy on you.”
It turned out that the style of dancing Kent knew was called bachata.
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
“Hey, so,” Kent said, holding out a package. Bethany and Chris were putting the kids to bed after letting them sing the birthday song, which left Kent and Jeff down in the living room alone. “Happy Birthday or whatever.”
Jeff grinned, swiping it out of Kent’s hands before throwing himself down onto the sofa. “Thanks, man,” he said. It wasn’t very heavy. He shook it, listening for any rattling. “What is it?”
“You can open it, dumbass,” Kent said.
Jeff laughed and ripped at the wrapping, just comics from the Sunday newspaper. “Couldn’t even pony up for real wrapping paper, huh Parse?”
Kent shrugged, sitting down next to Jeff. He pulled his lower lip in under his teeth, chewing at the skin just a little.
Jeff looked away, focusing on getting into the plain white box in his lap. Kent had really taped it up good, holy shit. What was the point of --
“Oh,” he breathed, staring down into the box at a brightly colored comic book. Holy
crap
. “Wow. Man. This is --”
“
The Amazing Spider-Man
number 129,” said Kent, fidgeting a little. “The first appearance of the Punisher.”
Jeff didn’t know what to say. He hadn’t realized Kent was actually
paying attention
to him when he was rambling about comics. Getting to know someone could be difficult, and Kent was… kind of more reticent than Jeff had expected. He’d kind of just talked about himself while trying to draw Kent out -- and it was working, it was just. Kent had probably heard way, way more about the Punisher and Spiderman than he’d ever wanted to, all things considered. He wasn’t really a comic book guy.
And this was a really specific comic. “Dude.” Picking the comic up out of the box, Jeff carefully turned it over.
“You were looking for it, right?” Kent asked.
“Yeah,” said Jeff.
He remembered.
And, damn. It was perfect: bright inks, tight binding, sharp corners. Kent must’ve looked for it forever. “It’s so awesome, man,” Jeff said, turning it back over. “What grade is this?”
“Um,” said Kent. “9.8.”
“It -- is it
signed
?” Jeff’s chest whole chest was warm. He ran a finger over the signature.
“Yeah,” Kent said, hunching his shoulders just a little.
Jeff took a moment to carefully set the book down on the coffee table before tackling Kent, pulling him into a tight hug.
“Oh --” Kent fell over a little, laughing. “Okay, wow. You’re welcome!”
“It’s fucking perfect, dude,” Jeff said. “I can’t believe you remembered that I was looking for this one, I didn’t even think you were listening to me --”
“What?” Kent pulled back and ruffled Jeff’s hair, smiling the crooked smile that Jeff had learned meant he was actually happy. “C’mon. You love this shit.”
Jeff’s stomach wobbled just a little. “Yeah,” he said, “I do. Thank you.”
Kent cleared his throat after a moment. “So, uh,” he said. “Can you like, read it? Or is this a collecting thing?”
“Oh, I’m totally gonna read it,” Jeff said.
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
Jeff brought the mail in with him, kicking off his shoes as he stepped inside out of the blistering heat that Vegas's excuse for autumn. “Hey! There’s mail!” He dropped his keys on Christopher’s kitchen cabinet, juggling a large box and several magazines. Setting everything down, he peeked at the name on the heavy box.
Kent Parson.
“Parse! There’s a box here for you!” Jeff yelled. He opened the fridge and grabbed a can of Coke. Cracking it open, Jeff leaned on the counter. The soda’s acid-sweet taste burned in his mouth.
Kent padded into the kitchen, feet bare and hair wild. He’d obviously been asleep, even though it was two in the afternoon. “What’re you doing here?” he asked. Yawning, he stretched. “I thought you were coming at two.” When he leaned over to look at the box, he frowned. “What’s this?”
“It
is
two,” said Jeff. “Did you forget to set an alarm again? I told you to stop taking a nap without an alarm, you’re gonna be so fucked next week when we play Boston.”
Kent tore at the tape on the box, deliberately making as much noise as possible. “Whatever, man.” Flipping the top open, he peered down into it and froze, muscles in his shoulders tight.
“What?” Jeff asked.
“Uh -- nothing,” Kent said. He closed the top of the box. “I gotta, um.” He took the box and left the kitchen as Jeff stared after him.
What the hell was in that box?
After half an hour of silence, Jeff went upstairs to check on Kent. His bedroom door was open, and Jeff leaned on the frame, peering inside.
Kent was sitting cross legged on his bed, a book in his lap. It looked like a bible.
“Hey, man. You okay?” Jeff asked, voice soft. He stayed in the doorway.
“This was my dad’s stuff,” Kent said. He dragged the edges of his fingers down the leather front of the bible. There were other things scattered around him on the bed -- photos in frames, clothing, a rosary, books, a police badge. He was wearing a green hoodie that Jeff couldn’t remember seeing before.
“Can I come in?”
Kent scrubbed the heel of his hand over his eyes before he looked up. “Yeah,” he said. “Whatever.”
Edging into the room, Jeff approached the bed slowly. Picking up a silver picture frame, he looked down at the photo. A tall police officer with a familiar sunny smile and sandy hair beamed at the camera, a chubby baby on his hip. The officer had that same cowlick Kent had, his face littered with the same soft freckles. “He looks like you,” Jeff said.
“I look like him,” said Kent. He looked at the photo in Jeff’s hands and ran a hand over his hair. It didn’t help the mess. “I don’t think my mom likes it.”
His mom. She’d just gotten engaged to someone over the summer, right? “Did she send you all this stuff?” Jeff asked, setting the photo down next to a brown leather wallet.
“Yeah,” Kent said. He looked back down at the bible in his lap. “I, um. I think she’s kind of, you know. Moving on.” He brushed a finger over the embossed name on the front of the book --
Adrian Parson
. “‘Cause of Dan.”
Jeff eased himself down onto the bed next to Kent, pushing a soft blue sweater to one side. A small stack of murder mystery novels toppled over, and he tried to catch them before any of them slid off the bed. “I’m sure she thought you’d appreciate having this stuff,” he said. It looked like Kent’s mom had sent him everything she had left that had belonged to his dad, and he tried to imagine wanting to part with every last thing that linked him to someone he loved.
Kent turned a ring over in his hand. He swallowed. “She even sent me his wedding ring,” he said, and his voice was rough.
“I’m sorry, bud,” said Jeff, because he had no idea what else he could say.
“It’s fine,” Kent said. “I mean, it’s -- it’s -- it is what it is. It’s fine.” He brushed his hand over the blue sweater, picked up the police badge and ran his thumb over the printed letters. Glancing at Jeff, he twitched the corner of his mouth in what Jeff assumed was meant to be a smile. “I want her to be happy,” Kent said. “I do.”
They sat in silence for a few minutes before Jeff leaned forward a little, looking at the faded logo on Kent’s hoodie. “This come in the box, too?” He paused. “Your dad was a
North Stars
fan?”
Kent laughed a little. “Yeah. Yeah, I know.”
“I thought you’re from New York!”
“I
am
!”
“But your dad was a
Minnesota
fan? Something doesn’t add up,” Jeff said, teasing just a little.
Kent was smiling again, and the knot in Jeff’s stomach relaxed just a little. “Yeah, yeah,” Kent said. “You’re just mad it wasn’t Calgary.”
“Calgary,” said Jeff, defending his hometown, “is a wonderful city. Everyone should love it.”
The smile on Kent’s face softened just a little, and he glanced away from Jeff. “Yeah,” he said, “I’m assuming.” Glancing back down at the bible in his lap, he set it aside.
“He would’ve been proud of you,” said Jeff.
“You don’t know that.”
The urge to wrap his arms around Kent burned in Jeff’s chest. Putting his hand on Kent’s back was a poor substitute for pulling him close, but Jeff didn’t know what else he was supposed to do. He let his thumb gently stroke over the fabric of the hoodie, worn and soft. “Yeah, I do,” he said. “Yeah, I do.”
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
Kent never got into fights on the ice. He was smaller than a lot of guys, and he tended to rely on speed to get him out of things. He avoided penalties because he never came out on the better side of them, and that was just fine. Kent was worth a lot more to the Aces than checking, even just one year in -- he’d even gotten the A, and it was only his second year in the NHL.So for Kent to get five for fighting? Something had to have gone wrong.Not that Jeff would know, because he was too busy talking to a medic about whether or not his knee was okay. He’d taken a rough check in the second period, not coming back for the third. His knee would be fine, they said, but he might need to sit out a couple of games.He’d known something was wrong as soon as the rest of the guys made it back to the showers after the game. Kent was pissy, tossing his equipment around with a disregard that was completely unlike him. He avoided looking at Jeff and, from the sounds of it, snapped at someone else in the hallway and might’ve punched the shower wall once he was in there. Everyone was giving him a wide berth, and Christopher shook his head at Jeff, fending off his questioning glance.When Jeff boarded the bus, Kent didn’t say a word to him. Kent had a cut above his eyebrow, a deep scowl on his face, and he flinched away from Jeff’s attempt to investigate. They both sat there, saying nothing, as the bus rolled out of the parking lot. After half an hour of silence, it was too much to take.“What the hell is wrong with you?” Jeff asked, glancing over.“ Nothing ,” Kent snapped. He twisted in his seat, facing the window.“Yeah,” said Jeff, “and I’m the queen of England.” Kent didn’t say anything. Jeff rolled his eyes. “ Fine ,” he muttered, speaking Stoney, and if he’d said he didn’t relish the dirty look it earned him from Kent, he’d be lying.They didn’t talk the entire way home.Jeff didn’t understand what he’d done wrong, but Kent was definitely avoiding him. It was apparent about a week later, when he still hadn’t gotten a single text and he’d been shot down any time he’d suggested going running or cooking like they always did. If Kent still lived with Christopher, it wouldn’t matter -- but now that he lived alone, it was easy for him to hide.It was irritating. Jeff couldn’t imagine what he’d done -- he’d taken a check! That was it! -- to warrant such behavior. All he was sure of was that Kent pulled away from hugs faster than he used to, and he wasn’t making eye contact very often. When they spoke, all Kent asked about was Jeff’s knee and whether or not he was okay. It didn't seem like he believed Jeff when he said it would be fine, but he also didn't seem too interested in discussing it, either. Kent excused himself from conversations earlier than he ever had.Maybe he’d guessed? Jeff knew that they’d been spending a lot of time together, lately. Christopher had remarked on it, and Jeff had to wonder if he was being too… obvious. That couldn't be it, though, could it? He was still seeing women. He knew everyone saw him with women. Still, even if that were the case, it wasn’t right for Kent to ignore him like that -- he hadn't done anything! At least, he hadn't done anything that he knew of.The irritation of it all saw him standing on Kent’s doorstep on a Wednesday night, ringing the doorbell. When Kent pulled the door open and frowned, Jeff felt his shoulders sag. Now that he was standing on Kent's doorstep, he didn't know if he could keep the righteous indignation thing going. Kent's hair was a soft blond mess, his eyes tired behind his glasses. He was wearing a faded Quebec Nordiques shirt and soft sweatpants, his feet bare.“What’s up?” Kent asked, opening the front door. He didn’t move aside to allow Jeff to enter.“I know you’re pissed at me,” Jeff said. “I just don’t know what I did, and I’m -- it’s really pissing me off, okay? Just tell me. Tell me why you’re mad.”Kent took a breath. “I’m not mad,” he said.“Bullshit,” said Jeff.Kent stepped aside, pulling away from the door but not closing it. “You wanna come in?”Jeff stepped inside, but he didn’t feel better.“It’s not you,” Kent said, after a moment of silence.“Oh, yeah, great,” said Jeff, “next you’re gonna say, what? It’s me? It’s not you, it’s me ? Like a fucking breakup?”“It is,” Kent said, hunching his shoulders.“Shut up.” Jeff rubbed his hands over his hair in frustration. “You’ve been like this since that game. What the hell, Parse? Fighting? Is it because you --”“I just --” Kent closed his eyes, a muscle jerking in his jaw. When he opened them again, the steely grey of them gleamed in the low light. “I got carried away. I’m sorry.”Carried away? Jeff stared.“It won’t happen again. And I’m -- I'm not pissed at you. Okay?” Kent’s gaze was steady, but Jeff couldn’t shake the feeling that he was missing something.“Fine,” said Jeff.“Fine,” Kent said.Jeff lifted an eyebrow. “The least you can do is feed me, then.”The corner of Kent’s mouth lifted in a smile. “I have macaroni and cheese,” he said.“Perfect,” said Jeff. “Put extra butter in it.”
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
Kent was young to be named Captain, but he was perfect for it. He’d done well with the A the previous year, and because he’d also done well with leadership in the Q, it wasn’t much of a stretch to picture him with the C. Kent always worked hard and he was friendly with everyone on the team."He handles himself very well and takes care of his teammates in front of and with the media, which we think is very important,” said coach Scott in an interview.“See?” Jeff elbowed Kent. They were watching it at Jeff’s apartment, both sprawled out on the sofa after a day of training.“Yeah,” Kent said. He seemed a bit shocked by the whole thing -- he’d thought Christopher would be named the next Captain.Jeff glanced at him. “Hey,” he said, softening his tone. “It’s cool. You deserve it.”“I thought lots of guys did,” Kent said. He scratched behind Kevin’s ear.There was no point arguing with him about it. Kent tended to blow compliments off no matter how sincere they were. Jeff ruffled Kent’s hair. “C’mon. I’m hungry.”“We just ate!”Technically, they’d eaten an hour ago. “I don’t care.” Jeff stood up, stretching his arms above his head. “What d’you think about tacos?” Kent never turned down tacos, though they different preferences about where they should come from.“Mmm…” Kent pursed his lips.“I’ll take you to Tacos el Gordo,” Jeff grumbled, relenting.Kent grinned. “Deal,” he said.“You’re buying,” said Jeff.
Later, when he was getting ready to leave, Jeff went upstairs to say goodbye to Kent. The bedroom door was cracked, and he could just barely hear Kent on the phone.
“-- I don’t even know why I’m calling you. I know you don’t care. But I -- I got the C.” The weight of his voice settled over Jeff like ice. “I miss you,” Kent said, almost a whisper. “I don’t even know if you listen to my messages. But I miss you.” A pause. “I know you don’t miss me.” There was enough silence for Jeff to conclude that Kent hung up, and he took a step away from Kent’s bedroom door.
Jeff decided he hated whoever Kent was calling.
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
“So?” Kent asked, following Jeff up the stairs to his apartment. “What’s the deal? Who’s your new best friend?”
“Aw, don’t be jealous, Parse!” Jeff unlocked his front door. “It’s cute, though. Don’t worry. You’ll always be my number two.”
“Whatever,” Kent said.
They stepped into the apartment to see a big, skinny dog laid out on the sofa, head propped up on the armrest. It wagged its tail.
“This is Kevin!” Jeff beamed.
“Oh!” Kent grinned. “Hi, Kevin!” He waved.
The brindle greyhound didn’t move. Kent blinked.
“They’re lazy dogs,” said Jeff. “That’s what they told me at the place.”
“He has your eyes,” Kent said.
“She’s a girl,” Jeff said, staring at the gangly dog. She stretched. “I love her.”
“If it’s a girl then why did you name it Kevin? And is she supposed to be that skinny?” Kent asked.
“She’s a
greyhound
, Parse,” said Jeff. “And when I was a kid my imaginary friend was a girl named Kevin, so I thought it’d be cool to have a real girl named Kevin for a friend.” He sat next to Kevin and stroked a hand over her head. “Huh, girl? Yes.”
Kent smiled. “You’re weird,” he said.
“Yep.” Kevin laid her head in Jeff’s lap and he grinned up at Kent. “She likes me. See?”
“What’re you gonna do with her when we’re out of town?” Kent asked.
“Oh, I’ll ask Bethany to watch her,” Jeff said. “Or I’ll board her. It’ll be okay.”
Kent sat next to him, stroking a hand across Kevin’s head. “She’s sweet,” he said.
“Like me,” said Jeff. He grinned.
Kent rolled his eyes. “Whatever. Is it okay for her to live in an apartment, though? I mean, like. Shouldn’t you have a yard, or something?”
“Apparently it’s fine, ‘cause they don’t need a lot of exercise,” Jeff said. “She’s a rescue. I guess she was a racing dog before? And now all she needs is love, right, girl?” He scratched behind one of Kevin’s ears.
“That’s nice of you,” said Kent, “getting a rescue instead of buying a puppy.”
Jeff smiled down at Kevin. “She deserves it,” he said. “I don’t think being a racing dog is a great life. They said she needed a lot of TLC when she came in, so --”
“So you’re perfect for her.” Kent’s voice was soft.
Jeff swallowed. Why did his throat feel so tight? “I don’t know about that,” he said. “I’m gonna try, though.”
“I can’t believe you’re replacing me with a dog,” Kent said.
Jeff rolled his eyes.
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
The mountains were beautiful. Jeff loved going home in the summer -- Christopher and Bethany always visited with the kids for at least a month, and even though he’d gone back to Vegas early with them last year, Jeff had a feeling that staying out in the mountains and visiting Calgary would be good for him. Hell, any escape to a different place would be good for him. And, after a rough playoff season that ended with their elimination in the second series, it seemed like Kent could use a break. New York and his mother’s new family never sounded very relaxing, and Jeff remembered how lonely Kent had seemed last summer.
He would love it in Alberta. The mountains were like medicine. Jeff knew his parents wouldn’t mind his bringing someone home to visit, and Christopher and Bethany would be thrilled to have extra hands with the kids. Kent would likely get stuck in Jeff’s room with him, but that was fine. They roomed together all the time on roadies, so it wouldn’t matter.
“Come to the mountains with us,” Jeff said. They were eating dinner before heading out to the NHL awards.
Kent looked up from his stir fry. “What?”
“This summer,” said Jeff. “Come visit. You’ll like it, I promise.” He took a large bite of his own food. “Chris and Bethany’ll bring the kids and my parents won’t mind, it’ll be great. You’ll love Calgary. I’ll take you to the Stampede. It’ll be fun.”
It took a bit more convincing than that, but eventually Kent agreed to come to Canada after seeing his mom in New York. His mother was pregnant with a new baby, anyway, and he didn’t want to be underfoot. Things sounded strained, in Jeff’s opinion, but he knew it wasn’t really his business.
His business mostly involved making Kent smile.
Jeff resolved to take Kent hiking and out to the rodeo and the dinosaur museum, the kind of fun, innocent things a guy ought to be doing during a summer off. They worked it out so that Kent would visit his mother in New York before coming to Calgary at the beginning of July, where he’d stay for a month and a half. When Jeff asked his parents if they minded, their response was enthusiastic. Apparently, Christopher had mentioned Kent to them, too.
He picked Kent up at the airport by himself, ignoring the curious stares of people who recognized him. Kent waved as soon as he saw him, a smile breaking across his face.
“Hey, man,” Jeff said. Kent’s flight had come in early. “Hungry?”
“Starving.” They headed for the car.
“How d’you feel about pancakes?” Jeff asked, putting on his seatbelt. “Because we’re about to eat
so many
fuckin’ pancakes.”
“It’s a sin to turn down breakfast food,” Kent said. He glanced at the radio. “What
is
this?”
“Nope,” said Jeff, “shut it. My car, my music.” He paused. “You know it’s Rush.”
Kent groaned.
After he’d fed Kent and shown him some of the city, Jeff took them home to drop off his stuff. As he’d suspected, his parents expected Kent to stay in Jeff’s room -- Christopher and Bethany and the kids all stayed with them when they visited in the summer, which meant that their guest rooms were full. Jeff took Kent down the hallway to his room, apologizing.
“It’s fine,” Kent said. “Seriously. I don’t care.” He dropped his bag on the floor.
“I can get an air mattress or something,” Jeff said. They’d slept in the same bed often enough that he hadn’t thought about it until he saw Kent’s measuring glance at the single queen sized bed in the room.
“Why,” Kent asked, “you worried I’ll cuddle you?”
Jeff laughed. Worried? Not at all. “You should be so lucky,” he said.
“Your cohort of women would kill me,” said Kent.
“Whatever,” said Jeff. He didn’t have a
cohort
of women. And if he had, he wouldn’t care about them, anyway.
When they went back downstairs, Jeff’s mother met them in the kitchen. “You boys going to the opening ceremony?” she asked.
“Yeah,” Jeff said. “Where’s Chris?”
“Julianna’s sick,” she said. “I don’t think they’ll go with you tonight. But you go and have fun --” she smiled at Kent, who smiled back. “Both of you.”
“Thank you for having me, ma’am,” he said.
Jeff leaned over, kissing his mother on the cheek. “We’ll be back later.”
“Your mom is so nice,” Kent said, as they walked out to get back in Jeff’s car.
“Yeah, she’s cool,” Jeff said. He turned the key in the ignition.
“Where are we going?”
“We’ll get there in time for the dancing exhibition,” Jeff said. “My cousin’s dancing this year, so we gotta go. And then there’s a tipi raising contest, so I thought we’d go to that.” He glanced at Kent. “I’m assuming you don’t wanna stay out drinking all night, so… I thought we’d do other stuff.”
He felt warm seeing the small smile on Kent’s face.
It was crazy at the Stampede. They were there pretty early, but it was still full of people. Kent and Jeff blended right into the crowd, right up until the moment they walked into the Indian Village and Jeff caught sight of his cousin.
“Hey! Jonas!”
Jeff found himself quickly saying hi to a bunch of people he knew, being invited to come drum with old friends, and just generally losing sight of Kent pretty quickly. It was easy to do.
They spent most of their first night out in the Indian Village, looking at the tipis and wandering around. Jeff tried to encourage Kent to ask questions if he had any, and he had fun introducing him to various people he knew. By the time they went back to Jeff’s parents house, Kent was yawning -- he’d gotten up early for that flight.
Jeff knew Kent was tired when he didn’t dream.
The next day, Jeff figured that taking Kent to see as much cowboy bullshit as possible would be the most fun and typical way to pass time. There were only about a
million
things to do, so they started with agriculture and went from there. For some reason, Kent seemed to really like listening to people talk about what they did, and he
definitely
liked petting animals. His eyes went all soft as he stroked a horse’s nose, and Jeff smiled.
Asking him to come was a great idea. He’d have to remember to take Kent to the dog bowl.
After walking through vendor halls and looking at things for sale, Jeff was too hungry to do anything other than eat. They strolled around the midway, finding plenty of things to eat -- and drink. Kent surprised Jeff by actually drinking with him, and when they sat down to watch chuckwagon racing, he sat closer than usual. Jeff expected a fun, boisterous time, but he hadn’t counted on Kent being so upset by a wreck. They left after Kent’s third question in regards to whether or not the horses would be okay.
Maybe Jeff needed to alternate Stampede with something gentler.
He knew just the thing. A day trip to Banff would be beautiful. They could get up early to get in the car and make the drive over to the Banff from Calgary -- it took about an hour and a half, but the country was pretty and Jeff wouldn’t mind driving.
“Hey,” he said, as they walked up to the house that night, “you wanna skip Stampede tomorrow and go hiking? Stoney-Nakoda day isn’t until Tuesday, so it’s no big deal.”
Kent’s surprised expression brought a chill of regret to Jeff’s stomach. Of
course
he’d want to go hiking, away from all the people. “Yeah,” he said, as if he couldn’t believe Jeff was asking him to go somewhere quiet. “That’d be awesome.”
“Cool,” said Jeff. And then, “you know we’re not just gonna always party here, right? The Stampede’s just a big thing.”
“It’s fine,” Kent said.
His nightmare woke Jeff up halfway through the night.
In the morning, they woke up spooning and neither of them said anything. It was one bed, things happened. Right? Jeff went downstairs to make coffee before Kent had a chance to mention it.
It was an easy drive out to Banff, one Jeff had made what felt like hundreds of times. The sky was clear and they had strong coffee in hand, and Kent stared out the window, taking in the scenery.
“Pretty, huh?” Jeff said.
“It’s really beautiful here,” said Kent.
Jeff drove them to Waterfowl Lake’s campgrounds, parking the car in the cul-de-sac for Chephren Lake hiking and putting up a sunshade in the windshield. He figured they’d do Chephren first, and then if Kent wanted something more challenging, they could do Cirque Lake.
Jeff preferred Cirque Lake, but it was nice to pick something easy to start with.
It was beautiful no matter where they looked. The hike started with crossing foot bridges over the turquoise water of the Mistaya River. Kent stopped to stare at it for a little while, enchanted with the water.
“We haven’t even gone anywhere yet,” Jeff said. He laughed and tugged on Kent’s arm. “C’mon.”
Chephren Lake was a popular trail, not difficult at all. It was heavily travelled and relatively flat, but it lead them through the lush, aromatic forest. It was the smell of summer, comforting and serene.
They crossed log bridges over little streams and muddy patches, continuing through the forest until they reached the shoreline of Chephren Lake. It was even more blue than the Mistaya River, and the view was stunning. Rugged mountains surrounded the exquisite water, and it was a view that never ceased to make something in Jeff’s heart feel clean.
“Here we are,” Jeff said. A slight breeze stirred his hair. It had been a bit of a steeper climb to get all the way up, and it was hot out. He motioned with an arm. “Chephren Lake. And that --” he pointed. “That’s Mount Chephren.”
It was worth it for the look on Kent’s face. “Oh,” he breathed, eyes wide as he took in the sight of the mountains kissing the sky.
Jeff smiled. “Yeah,” he said, fighting the urge to grab Kent’s hand. “It’s perfect.”
He wasn’t looking at the mountains.
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
After the Stampede was over and they'd wasted a lot of time in the city, Jeff took Kent to the Tyrell Dinosaur museum. It was a light-hearted and fun place to visit, and it gave them some road trip time to relax and talk about Kent’s visit with his mother. They had turned up to the museum on the same day as a few group trips, it seemed, but neither Kent nor Jeff really cared. They could tag along on a tour with kids or explore alone.
“That’s Kent Parson and
Jeff Troy
!” An excited woman’s voice filtered into Jeff’s hearing. He smiled a little. Was she trying to whisper? It wasn’t working.
“
Mom
!” hissed her son. “No! Don’t! They’re like, on vacation!”
Jeff glanced over his shoulder, catching sight of a boy attempting to drag his mother away. In the hallway, he could see a group of kids obviously visiting the museum together, and several of them looked away from him immediately.
Kent hadn’t noticed them. “Here, c’mere --” he held his phone up, angling it a little. “Say cheese!”
Jeff stuck his tongue out as Kent snapped the picture.
“I’m so putting this on Twitter,” Kent said.
“How many selfies are we taking with dinosaurs today?” Jeff asked. They’d already taken at
least
five.
“As many as humanly possible,” Kent said, as if it were obvious.
“Right,” said Jeff, watching Kent grin as he added the picture to social media.
They ran into the group of kids outside, all of them planning on digging for fossils. Jeff smiled at them -- it would be more fun to dig for fossils with kids. Kids made a lot of things more fun.
Kent signed an autograph for one child when asked, and it wasn’t long until he was answering questions and playfully chatting with the children. They were
swarmed
with kids asking for autographs, and to Jeff’s surprise, most of them were asking him first instead of Kent.
It made no sense. Kent was a much bigger name than Jeff was. He’d just gotten the Captaincy, for crying out loud. He’d been amazing even in junior hockey.
One of the chaperones stopped him after a particularly excited boy had bounced in front of him for five minutes. “Thanks so much for humoring them,” she said.
“Not at all,” said Jeff.
“It just means a lot to them, and we’re all proud of you,” she said. “I have a couple students in Timbits hockey now, because of you.”
Jeff flushed. “Thank you,” he said. “They’re great.”
After the group of kids left, Jeff turned around to see Kent grinning at him.
“Oh my God,” Kent said, “Jeff Troy!”
“Shut up,” Jeff said.
“Can I get your autograph?” Kent asked, eyes wide. “Please?”
“Come on,” Jeff said, shoving Kent’s arm and heading for the door. “Quit it.”
“Those kids
loved
you, man,” Kent said, falling into step beside Jeff. “You’re their hero.”
“No, that’s the other Troy,” Jeff said. Christopher was
really good
at hockey. Everyone knew that. He always had been.
“You mean a lot to them,” Kent insisted. “It’s awesome.”
“Whatever, man.” Jeff rubbed the back of his neck.
Kent compressed his lips in a thin line, but didn’t say anything else. He was soon absorbed by the dinosaurs again, taking pictures and reading all the placards out loud, trying to copy Jeff’s accent. Or, rather, whatever the hell he
thought
Jeff’s accent sounded like.
It was atrocious.
At some point Kent wandered off to use the bathroom, and it took an exceedingly long time for him to come back. Feeling a bit concerned, Jeff decided to look for him. Maybe he’d gotten distracted again.
Jeff turned a corner, but he still didn’t see Kent anywhere. “Hey!” he called, “c’mon! They’re closing, soon. This isn’t funny --”
“
Rawr
!” A figure leapt out from behind a large resin dinosaur, hands crooked like little claws.
Jeff let out an extremely undignified yelp, putting a hand up.
Kent erupted into peals of laughter. “Oh, man! You should’ve seen your face!”
Jeff landed a playful punch on Kent’s arm. “You’re dead, dude,” he said, and Kent took off at a light jog.
They played a very undignified game of hide and seek in the museum, spending most of their time attempting to scare each other and avoid getting caught. When they were eventually tracked down by a security guard and asked to leave, they both could barely hold in laughter until they were out the door.
The week flew by. Jeff took Kent to Peters’ for burgers and showed him the cultural center at Head-Smashed-In-Buffalo-Jump. They spent hours there, actually, where Kent read all the information slowly and refused to leave until he’d seen every inch of the place.
At the end of July, like always, Jeff and his family got ready to head out to the all-nations powwow. He’d grown up going to it, even after his family moved off the Stoney-Nakoda reserve so that Christopher could go further with hockey. It was one of Jeff's favorite parts of the summer, always had been. They’d visit some family while they were out there, too, so that meant everyone had to pack a little bit -- including Kent.
“-- And don’t record anything while they’re dancing,” Jeff said, folding a shirt and putting it into his bag. “Okay? No pictures, no recording.”
“Okay,” Kent said. He paused. “This is a big deal, huh?”
“Kind of,” Jeff said. He zipped up his bag. “But it’s great.” He smiled at Kent. “Don’t worry about it.”
“I’m not worried,” Kent said.
“You’re making the faceoff face,” Jeff said. “Seriously, it’s fine. Just be respectful, that’s all you have to do. You’re good at that.”
Kent laughed.
Having Kent there felt… right. Jeff tried to watch him when he thought Kent wasn’t looking, to gauge how much fun he was having. He seemed happy. The tightness that always lingered around Kent’s shoulder had relaxed out, and he was a big hit with the older ladies.
They took some time to explore the reserve before heading back to Calgary. It was beautiful and quiet, hiking up into the mountains. Kent and Jeff laid out on rocks and talked about life and Kent took pretty pictures of the scenery, posting them on social media every now and again.
The night before their flight back to Vegas, Kent laid Jeff’s bed, staring up at the ceiling.
“You okay?” Jeff was stuffing the last of his things back into his bags.
“Yeah,” Kent said. “I just kinda… don’t wanna leave. Is that weird?”
“Nah,” said Jeff. “I feel that way all the time.” He flopped down next to Kent. “Don’t worry. Mom wants you to come back any time. There’s always next summer, plus we’ll play the Flames at some point in the season, anyway.”
“Yeah?” Kent rolled over, looked Jeff in the face. “Your mom doesn’t mind if I come back?”
“You can come back whenever,” Jeff said. “But I’m gonna promise her next summer. Deal?”
Kent’s smile was warm and soft. “Deal,” he said.
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
Kent’s house was becoming Jeff’s favorite place.At first he’d thought it was a bit stupid for Kent to get a house as opposed to an apartment, but once Kent was close to finished with it, it seemed… right. It was perfect for him. The house was a decent size, with a big kitchen and high ceilings. The windows let in beautiful sunlight and all of his furniture was comfortable, arranged so that conversation was easy and the television wasn’t the most important thing in the room. His cat had plenty of room to roam and she liked sitting by the large windows, surveying the world. Kent’s little cactus and succulent collection had plenty of sunlight.When Jeff went to Kent’s house, it felt like coming home. The sofa was big enough for them to lounge on and play videogames or watch television without feeling cramped, something Jeff had learned to appreciate once he’d gotten so tall. The bedroom upstairs was incredible -- large and airy and, once Kent was through with it, cool and quiet. Everything was soft grey or blue. It was the kind of place Jeff wanted to lie down in, close his eyes, and hear the ocean.“What do you think?” Kent leaned on the doorway to his guest room, the last room he’d finished. It was all warm, soft lighting and natural wood furniture, clean and simple like the rest of the house.“It’s great,” Jeff said. “I wanna sleep here.”Kent laughed. “Well, you can if you want,” he said. “God knows I’ve fallen asleep at your place enough times in the last year.”Year and half. "True," Jeff said. "You can't stay awake through a movie to save your life." He grinned."Shut up," Kent said.Jeff ended up with a toothbrush in the bathroom and clothing in the closet. It happened slowly, not all at once -- they played videogames too late, Kent had an extra toothbrush for traveling, so Jeff left it in the bathroom for next time. They planned on meal prepping for a day and Jeff brought clothes for practice the next day, “just in case.” It was annoying to drive all the way back to his apartment late at night when there was a perfectly good, soft bed right there. The next time he came over to watch movies, Jeff brought a pair of pajamas and left them in the drawer in the guest room.Kent didn’t seem to mind. He put soap and shampoo in the guest bathroom for Jeff, made sure there was toothpaste. And sometimes, when he had his nightmares at night, they both ended up in the guest room with the classic movie channel on. Neither of them mentioned it to anyone else, because no one needed to know.Just like Kent didn't need to know that Jeff had memorized the freckles on his face, that the sound of his laugh made him feel all fizzy inside. Nothing good could come from that. Jeff wasn’t a stranger to dressing room talk, and he knew that just because he’d never seen Kent out with a girl didn’t mean he didn’t go out with them. As long as he made sure he didn’t stare too long, everything would be fine. Nobody would think he was gay.Not that Jeff was gay, of course. Experimenting at parties with guys in college was totally normal, and it didn't mean anything. It wasn't like he'd ever liked a guy before. Hell, he'd barely ever even liked a girl. It was just Parson. And he’d eventually get over him -- maybe.Probably.It was hard to feel confident about that, lying next to him in the dark.
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
Jeff jerked awake as the hotel room door opened. Fuck, what time was it? He rubbed at his eyes, rolling over to look at the harsh red letters on the hotel alarm clock. Three A.M.Sitting up on one elbow, Jeff squinted at the darkness. That had to be Kent coming back, right? As if on cue, Kent stumbled over something and swore, catching himself on the bed with one hand.“Ah -- shit,” he murmured, clearly trying to be quiet but not really succeeding. Jeff could smell the beer on him, and he frowned.Kent going out after the game had been unusual enough -- he knew they had to leave in the morning, and he’d been taking his first year as Captain very seriously. Jeff knew better than to question it, though, at least not after their embarrassing defeat by the Bruins that night. He had no idea where Kent had gone. But for Kent to come back so very late? After a night of drinking ? Too weird.Jeff swallowed. “You okay?” he asked, pitching his voice low.“Aw, fuck,” Kent said, “I was trying not to wake you up. I’m sorry.” His voice was rough.“It’s fine,” Jeff said, pushing himself all the way upright in the bed. “Where did you--”“I don’t want to talk about it,” Kent snapped, and that sentence was immediately followed by the sound of the bathroom door closing.Jeff flicked on the lamp by the bed, but it didn’t matter. Kent had already retreated and shut the door between them, and soon the soft sound of the shower was all Jeff could hear. He sighed.What the hell? It was supposed to be Kent going to bed early and Jeff stumbling in late. It always was. And to be honest, Jeff had sort of planned on staying in their hotel just because Kent usually did -- he’d even downloaded a couple of episodes of Gargoyles for them to watch. He'd planned to just sort of... hang out.Kent was in the bathroom for a long, long time. So long, in fact, that Jeff got out of bed and walked over to the door. He knocked gently. “Kent? You okay?”“‘M fine,” Kent said, his voice barely carrying through the door. It was not very convincing.Biting his lip, Jeff took a step back before stopping again. “You’ve been in there a long time,” he said, putting his hand on the door again. When Kent didn’t say anything he tried the handle, and the relief that flooded his stomach when the door opened immediately was a bit surprising.Kent was in the shower still, bracing himself with one hand on the wall. “It’s fine,” he said, again.“C’mon,” said Jeff. “You gotta sleep.” He grabbed a towel. “Seriously, it’s like three-thirty in the morning.”Pushing away from the wall, Kent turned and shut the shower off. When he pushed the door open, his eyes were red and a bit puffy. Jeff took a soft breath and handed him the towel. “Here,” he said.“Thanks.” Kent took the towel. After a moment, he looked up at Jeff. “Sorry for waking you up so late.”“It’s no big deal,” Jeff said.Soon they were both back in bed, the lamp still on and the bathroom door wide open. Jeff wasn’t sure if he should ask Kent where he’d gone again or not. Wherever it was, it didn’t seem like he’d had a very good time. Jeff couldn’t remember seeing him upset like that before.Kent laid on the bed, staring up at the ceiling. “I’m sorry,” he said, after a long moment passed.“What for?” Jeff rolled over onto his side.“I should’ve played better tonight,” Kent said. “I let you guys down.”Jeff frowned. What? “We’ll get ‘em next time,” he said. “Don’t worry about it. It’s one regulation loss.”“I just --” Kent took a breath. “Do you think Christopher would’ve been a better choice for Captain?”Jeff blinked. It was a fair, if unexpected, question. Everyone had assumed the Captaincy would go to Christopher. “No,” Jeff said. Kent worked so hard. “I think they made the right choice. You’re doing great.”“I’m not,” Kent said. “I’m just -- the only reason it looks like I am is you.”Frowning, Jeff shifted a little. “I don’t think --”“You and all the guys,” Kent continued, cutting him off. “The team is good. I’m lucky to be on it. And I just -- I’m sorry about tonight.”“Where did you go ?” Jeff asked. Where was this coming from? And how much had Kent had to drink?“It doesn’t matter,” Kent said. “None of it does. I shouldn’t have missed that shot tonight.”“Dude, it’s fine,” Jeff said. Kent couldn’t seriously be blaming their loss on his one shot that hit the pipe, could he? That was absurd. “Seriously. We’ll win next time. You can’t make every shot, that’s --”“I could’ve made that one.” Kent rubbed his face with both hands. “At least it wouldn’t’ve been a fucking shutout.”Jeff had no idea what to say. “I -- did someone say something to you?”After a moment, Kent pulled in a ragged breath. “I have to be better.” Be better? Fuck. Kent was already a whole bunch of bests in the Aces record book. “Look, man --”“Forget it,” Kent said. “I’m just tired. ‘Night, Jeff.”“Good night,” Jeff said, even though it wasn’t.Kent leaned over and shut the light off.Later, when he checked social media after they got off their flight, Jeff found pictures of Kent at a party at Samwell University.
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
“You wanna get out of here?” she asked, leaning closer. Her perfume was too sweet, like candied flowers. She was pretty, all curly blonde hair, big hips, and big green eyes, and she’d been eyeing Jeff all night.
“Sure,” Jeff said, because why not?
He tossed back the last of his drink, paid his tab, let her wind her hands around his bicep. She chattered idly about hockey as they got into the cab, headed for the hotel. Jeff was only half listening until she slid her hand along his inner thigh.
It was always the same -- pretty girl, passable sex, never missionary. Jeff preferred to fuck them from behind, and no one had ever complained. He made sure the girl always got off, because that was the polite thing to do, but they never stayed the night. He never gave or got a phone number, and he never, ever saw them again.
Hell, even if he had, he probably wouldn’t have recognized a one of them.
Jeff was, at least, honest about it. He never told any of the women he was looking for more than sex, and he made sure he didn’t leave with them if they implied they were. Casual sex, that’s all it was. Casual, athletic sex. He always used protection and usually, he picked a woman who’d been staring at him first -- he had to. He was never staring first, and it wasn’t hard. Women loved tall men, everyone knew that. And Jeff was very, very tall.
It was fine. It just wasn’t… exciting. It was fun enough, he supposed, but he didn’t miss it if it didn’t happen. When Jeff went home for the summer, he never slept with anyone. And most of the time, recently, he hadn’t been meeting girls in Vegas, either.
And he didn’t even care. It was only on the road, when they went out to bars after games or he wanted to let off some steam. It seemed normal. Shit, according to almost every guy in the locker room, it
was
normal. He tried not to think about it too much, especially not on nights when he made it back to the hotel room before Kent had managed to find an elsewhere to be.
It was a relief to find the room empty when he unlocked it with his keycard. There wasn’t a sign of Kent anywhere other than his bag, neat and tidy on the second bed. He was probably with Christopher.
By the time he’d turned around, the woman -- what was her name, again? Ashley? Probably. -- was already pushing at him, sitting him down so she could straddle his lap. He had her dress half off by the time she nipped at his ear, asked how he wanted it. It was easy to flip her over and grip her hips, and when she demanded he fuck her harder, he fisted a hand in her thick blonde hair. She was loud.
Kent didn’t come back, even after she was gone.
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
Kent lounged next to Jeff, leaning on both elbows, close but not touching. He let out a long, soft sigh, tilting his head back. The night was cool, a breeze blowing through the trees and stirring their hair. They were laid back on the grass together, shoulders touching.
Jeff handed him the pipe. “Is this our thing, now?” he asked.
Kent laughed before taking a hit, closing his eyes for a second. “What,” he said, after a moment, “coming to Canada over the summer or getting high?”
Laughing, Jeff took the pipe back. “Both, I guess,” he said. “At the same time.” Neither of them smoked during the season.
“Yeah, I guess so.” Kent turned to look at Jeff, eyes soft in the glow from the fire. “It’s a pretty chill thing.” He took the pipe back.
They’d had a stressful season. A stressful season combined with not winning the goddamned Cup had put every player on the Aces on edge, and Jeff was honestly glad it was over. Kent blamed himself
personally
for their loss to a mind-blowing degree, and Jeff hated it.
He was a little more relaxed now that they’d been home for a two weeks -- but only a little. That tightness in his shoulders, around the eyes, that wasn’t gone. Kent still had that pensive, quiet expression on his face, and he was dreaming more.
It was a good thing they shared a bed at Jeff’s parents’ house. Jeff was a pretty light sleeper, and he’d managed to catch Kent before he woke the whole house up with that screaming. He’d made plans for Banff the very next day. Mountain air and camping and smoking a bowl would do Kent a lot of good, he was sure of it.
Kent agreed as soon as Jeff suggested it, his eyes sparkling a little. Jeff made sure to drag his camping stuff out of the closet and pack the truck that night, leaving everything ready for them to get going in the morning. Kent was quiet in the passenger’s seat until Jeff started singing along to
More Than a Feeling
.
He managed to get Kent singing by the time they’d arrived at their destination.
After hiking around they set up their camp for the night, both of them tired and quiet. It was the most comfortable, companionable silence Jeff remembered having with someone he wasn’t related to.
It was perfect.
He’d been careful to steer their conversation topics away from their season during the day -- but at night, there was no getting around it. He was sure Kent was thinking about it, anyway. As they relaxed under the sky, Jeff accepted the pipe when Kent offered it, moving to reload the bowl. “Hey,” he said, while his hands were busy.
Kent sat up off his elbows. “What?”
“It’s not your fault we lost.” Jeff held out the pipe. “And don’t give me some bullshit about how you know that. You always think it’s because of you.”
Kent took a hit before answering. “It was my fault a lot in Juniors,” he admitted. “I know it’s stupid.” He shrugged one shoulder. “Sorry, man. I’ll get over it.”
Jeff frowned. “That’s -- no it wasn’t, bro, c’mon. You still played on a
team
. It was just as much their fault as it was yours.”
“Nah,” Kent said, “it wasn’t. I was a shitty player.”
“Dude, you went first in the draft,” said Jeff. “Shut up.”
“It doesn’t matter, anyway.” Kent laughed. “God, you’re such an after school special, man, seriously. What’s next? You gonna feed me some lines about like, loving myself or some shit?”
“Shut up!”
Kent was laughing again, the warm, bubbly laugh that meant he was truly amused. Jeff smiled, bumping Kent’s shoulder with his. “You’re such a dick,” he said.
“You are,” Kent said, and he reached out to ruffle Jeff’s hair.
His shoulder was warm where Kent leaned against it, and Jeff closed his eyes for a moment, letting his bones sink closer to the ground. He loved the mountains, loved the feel of the air and how
clean
it was up there, how wild. “I’m really glad you came,” he said, after a moment of quiet went by.
“Thank you for asking me,” Kent said. He held the pipe out. “I -- I think I needed this more than I realized.”
“You have been really
fucking
stressed out, man,” Jeff said. He lit the pipe again.
“Yeah, I... have nothing to say about that,” Kent said. He curled closer, eyes closing.
Jeff set the pipe aside. They both seemed to be doing pretty good, anyway. He wound an arm around Kent. “Good?”
“Yeah.” Kent tucked his face down against Jeff’s shoulder. “Sorry I’m like this,” he said, after a long moment of silence.
“Like what?”
Kent sounded so resigned. “Just… me.”
Jeff didn’t know what to say. “I -- I like the way you are,” he said, finally. When Kent didn’t reply he shifted, craning his neck to look down at him.
He was asleep.
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
Jeff headed up the stairs at Kent’s house, taking them two at a time. He was a bit early, he knew, but that was fine -- Kent never cared, anyway, and Jeff wanted to see if they had time to eat dinner before going out. Kent’s invitations to go dancing were too infrequent to turn down, and besides, Jeff had been practicing. He was actually
decent
at bachata, now.
Kent’s door wasn’t open. It was cracked, just a bit, and Jeff had his hand up to knock before he realized that Kent was talking. Pulling back a little, Jeff waited in the hallway.
“All right, all right. I know a bunch of you have been asking me questions forever, so I figured I could do you a solid and actually answer a couple of them for once…”
What was he doing? It sounded like he was doing some kind of question and answer thing, and as Jeff paused by the doorway, he couldn’t help but listen. Kent was reading questions off a list, from the sound of it, talking about the kind of music he liked to play and how long he’d been learning the guitar.
Jeff smiled. Kent did love to play guitar. He never wanted to play
with
anyone, nor did he want to play in
front
of anybody, but he loved to play. Jeff had heard him playing on roadies often enough to know that it was something Kent loved doing. He was pretty good, too -- he practiced a lot and usually, if Jeff waited for a song to be over before he interrupted him, Kent seemed happier once he was done.
The questions were completely random. They asked about his favorite cereal, favorite color. Jeff bit back a laugh when Kent answered one about his cat. That person was lucky they hadn’t gotten a three-hour lecture on how wonderful Kit was. There were questions about his age and whether or not he was a natural blond and who his favorite pop star was. Nothing on the list was news to Jeff at all, not until --
“Do I like guys?” A pause. “Yeah.” Kent cleared his throat and moved on to the next question, but Jeff couldn’t really focus on anything else he was saying.
Yeah.
Kent liked guys.
Jeff let his hand drop down by his side, feeling like he’d just been checked into the boards.
Fuck
. Kent was
gay
? Did that mean Kent was gay? It sounded like it did, but -- well, he couldn’t exactly ask, could he? Turning, Jeff pressed his back to the wall, looking up at Kent’s ceiling.
Fuck, that explained so much. It explained
everything
, honestly, from the fact that Jeff never saw Kent out with girls to his love of pop music and musicals to his perfect skincare routine and amazing suits. It explained why Kent shied away from Bethany every time she’d ever tried to set him up on a date with someone.
It meant Jeff had a chance. Didn’t it? Fuck, it could mean that. And if it did, then… then what was Jeff supposed to do? He didn’t know how to -- how to
be
with somebody. He was good at picking people up, at casual sex, stuff like that. But this?
Love?
How could he possibly tell Kent how he felt? He wasn’t even -- Jeff didn’t even think he was gay. Was he? It hadn’t seemed important, before. It didn’t matter if Jeff was gay if the only person he wanted wasn’t.
After a moment, Jeff realized Kent wasn’t talking any more. He pushed away from the wall, retreating to the top of the stairs. When Kent’s door opened, Jeff was coming back down the hall toward the bedroom.
Later, when they were taking a break for a drink at the club, Kent bumped Jeff with his shoulder. “Hey,” he said, “you’ve been practicing, huh? You’re looking good out there.”
Jeff laughed and tossed back the last of his drink. “Yeah? I had a good teacher.”
“You did, didn’t you?” Kent drained his glass as well.
“How about trying it again?” Jeff asked.
Kent set his glass down. “Okay,” he said, looking out at the dancefloor. He glanced back at Jeff. “C’mon -- I love this song!”
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
Kent was playing fucking Monica . Kent was playing Monica in their shared hotel room, and Jeff could not take another second of it. This was the longest roadie of his life . Couldn’t Kent play rock music just once in his life? And did Jeff have to leave every time Kent wanted to practice? He hadn’t planned on going out that night.After grabbing some ice, Jeff shoved the hotel room door open and stepped in.
“Man, can you please play something that rocks?” he stopped by the bed, looking down at Kent, who glanced up at him. What was he playing?Holy shit. Was that Angel of Mine ? God, he would.“Dude,” Jeff said, after a moment. “ Monica ? For real?” No way. Not today. “Gimme that --” he reached for the guitar.
“Oh my god, Jeff. What the hell?” Kent leaned back, pulling the guitar away as Jeff reached for it. “Get off -- No --”
But Jeff was stronger, even though they were just playing, and Kent had yet to win a single wrestling match against him.Well. Jeff let him win a few times. Those didn’t count. And this? Not one of those times.
Holding the guitar, Jeff perched on the end of Kent’s bed. “Just a little bit, man. You should’ve told me you were bringing this, I could’ve brought mine --” He started playing Stairway to Heaven . “We can jam, you know?” It’d be fun. A bonding experience.
Kent groaned. “ Stairway ? For real? I’m --” his phone started ringing.
Jeff stopped playing and picked up the phone. Staring down at the caller ID, he saw… Eric. Followed by a string of cute emojis. “Looks like, uh.. Eric Peach Sparkle Heart Cake Emoji is calling you?” Looking up at Kent’s face, Jeff tilted the phone, watching as Kent smiled the warmest, sweetest smile to grace his face in a long, long time.It made Jeff’s stomach hurt. Get it together. Jeff cleared his throat and elbowed Kent. “Man. Do we need to ta--”
“Gimme that!” Kent grabbed for his phone. He reached for his computer, snapping it shut as he answered the call with a soft “hey, you.” Glancing at Jeff, he smiled just a little before leaving the guitar on the bed and stepping into the hallway, letting the door close behind him.Fuck. Jeff looked down at his hands. Eric .What was that heavy feeling in his chest? Jeff took a breath. Eric peach sparkle heart cake emoji . Jeff was just in Kent’s phone as “Swoops”.Kent had been spending a lot more time on the phone, lately, now that Jeff thought about it. He was certainly texting much more than usual, and the soft smiles he gave his phone screen hadn’t escaped Jeff’s notice. He just hadn’t really considered the idea that it might be… well, it might be a boyfriend.He swallowed. No doubt Kent would come back with that apprehensive look on his face, wondering what Jeff was thinking about the caller ID. Since he hadn’t discussed this Eric person with Jeff before, he obviously… didn’t want to talk about it. Him.Whatever.Jeff went to the bathroom and splashed water on his face. Leaning on the counter with both hands, he took a breath. Honestly, it was a miracle that something like this hadn’t already happened. Kent was amazing, anyone could see that. He wouldn’t stay single forever, and it wasn’t like Jeff had -- well, it wasn’t like Jeff had made any moves.Hell, he’d come back with a girl on their last away game. There was nothing to say. Kent hadn’t talked to Jeff about his sexuality, hadn’t admitted to being gay, and it wasn’t something Jeff could just… ask about. They were so close that he’d sort of figured that Kent would tell him? Some time? And when he did, then maybe Jeff could say something, and it wouldn’t be weird, because --“Damnit,” Jeff hissed. He was so fucking stupid.He dried his face and left the bathroom, throwing himself onto the bed. It was easy to find a channel with cartoons playing and zone out, drinking a soda and trying to think about something, anything, else. When Kent returned to the room, poking his head through the door with that soft, wary look on his face, Jeff didn’t say anything.“Hey,” Kent said, closing the door.“Hey, man.” Jeff took a drink of his soda. “You good?”“Yeah.” Kent sat on his bed, glancing at the television. “Johnny Quest?”“I know, right? I didn’t think they had it on television any more.” Jeff laughed.Kent’s shoulders relaxed a little.After brushing his teeth and taking a shower, Kent settled into bed, rolling over onto his side with his back to Jeff. “Turn the lights off before you go to sleep,” he murmured.“Sure.” Jeff flicked on a lamp and got up to turn off the rest of the lights. It looked like they weren’t going to talk about it, after all.It was only the next morning that Jeff realized that Kent didn’t dream, that he hadn’t been dreaming nearly as much for quite a while.
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
Kent was off his game. Not much, not enough to matter, but enough that Jeff noticed. When they left the ice after practice, heading into the showers, Jeff trailed behind Kent, waiting.
Kent took his duty as Captain very seriously. He always stayed until everyone left. Jeff waited around, heading for the shower last after joking around with several of the guys. When he emerged again, Kent was slowly putting his shoes on.
Almost everyone was gone, and it was getting late.
“Hey, man.” Jeff sat down next to Kent as De los Santos stepped out of the dressing room.
Kent glanced at him. “Hey.” His gaze flicked to the clock on the wall, then back to Jeff. “You need something?”
“Do you?”
“No,” Kent said.
Yeah. Right. Jeff just stared at him, and Kent sighed.
They were just back from an East Coast game, now that Jeff thought about it. He’d been subdued on the flight home, pensive and withdrawn, not even taking half of Jeff’s granola bar. And the way Kent’s shoulders seemed to sort of… sink… reminded him of that night back in 2012. “Dude, is this like that time two years ago when you disappeared after a game and came back super wasted?”
“It’s not like that,” Kent said. When Jeff continued staring, raising one eyebrow, he sighed. “Okay, it’s a little bit like that.”
Jeff leaned back, looking up at the ceiling. A little bit like that, huh? “I’m guessing you don’t wanna talk about it?”
Kent swallowed, and when Jeff looked back at him, he was rubbing his face with both hands. “I’m --
fuck
, I’m bringing it onto the ice, aren’t I?”
“A little bit,” Jeff admitted. “Not enough to mess things up, not yet. But I’m, um. I’m worried about you?”
“I’m gonna be fine,” Kent said. “I will. I’ll, you know. I’m gonna get over it.”
I’m gonna get over it
was as close as Kent seemed to come to admitting that he was hurt. Rubbing Kent’s shoulder, Jeff sighed. “Yeah, man. I’m sure you will.” How bad did it have to be for Kent to admit it? Fuck.
But Jeff was willing to bet that macaroni and cheese and
Ever After
would help. It wouldn’t fix anything, but it might make Kent feel better. “You wanna come over to mine tonight?” he asked. “Kevin misses you.”
Kent let out a tiny little laugh. “Yeah, why not?”
“Okay,” Jeff said.
By the time Kent walked through Jeff’s front door, he already had the macaroni and cheese halfway made. He’d picked out a bunch of random movies that he knew Kent liked, and Kevin was wearing the navy blue sweater Kent had gotten her. Jeff had draped Kent’s favorite soft, fluffy Aces blanket over the corner of the sofa, too. Everything would be comfortable, that was the plan.
Kent’s soft little smile made it worth it. He leaned in Jeff’s kitchen doorway in that old North Stars hoodie, which was probably Jeff’s least favorite thing to see him wear. It was a sad hoodie.
“I’m putting hot dogs in yours,” he said, handing Kent a bowl of macaroni. “It’s disgusting, but I’m doing it.”
“It’s not disgusting,” Kent said.
“Dude, I don’t even know what these are made of!”
“Meat,” said Kent.
“Gross.”
Halfway through the movie, when Kent leaned against him a little, Jeff squeezed his shoulders. Kent hadn’t checked his phone at all, which was… out of character for him, considering the last few months. On screen, Drew Barrymore stepped into the ball. “Just breathe,” she said.
Kent let out a shivering sort of breath, scrubbing a hand across his face. Kevin took the opportunity to lick him and he hugged her close. “Hi sweet girl,” he said.
“She loves you,” said Jeff.
So do I
.
“She doesn’t know any better,” Kent said. He gently stroked a hand over one of Kevin’s ears.
“She knows everything,” Jeff said. “All the secrets of the universe. Thought you knew that.”
Kent laughed. “Teach me your ways, Kevin,” he said.
Jeff squeezed Kent’s shoulder again. “Hey,” he said.
“Is for horses,” said Kent. “Isn’t that what you always say?”
Jeff laughed. “Yeah, it is. For real, though. Talk to me?”
Kent sighed. “There’s nothing to say, Jeff.” Rubbing Kevin’s ear, he shrugged one shoulder. “I made some bad decisions. Personally, I mean, not hockey ones, and it -- consequences. You know?”
Eric. It had to be. Right? Whoever Eric was, given how many emojis Kent had next to his name in his phone, Jeff assumed that he was… important.
But they’d never talked about him, not ever. Jeff saw his name on Kent’s phone
one time
, and Kent had dodged questions about it so much that Jeff had given up asking. He couldn’t ask
now
. He didn’t have a leg to stand on, anyway -- Kent wasn’t the only one with secrets. “Okay,” said Jeff, because he didn’t know what else to say.
“Thanks for asking,” Kent said. “Sorry I’m… like this, I guess.”
“You’re fine how you are,” Jeff said. “Don’t worry about it.”
Later, when Jeff woke up with Kevin across his legs and Kent’s head on his chest, he realized that they’d all fallen asleep in a giant pile. He had a cramp in his arm, but he didn’t want to move. Kevin and Kent looked so comfortable. Snagging his phone with his free hand, Jeff checked the time: four in the morning.
He really ought to get up and go to bed. He’d regret sleeping on the sofa like that, it always hurt his neck like crazy the next day. It would make practice harder than it needed to be.
Still, looking back down at Kent’s gentle, sleeping face, Jeff realized he didn’t want to move. He dropped his head back against the sofa, closing his eyes.
Five more minutes.
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
His phone was ringing. Jeff pushed the button to accept and held the phone to his ear, waiting.“Swoops?” Kent was clearly still at Bad Bob Zimmermann’s ceremony, Jeff could hear it in the background. He’d honestly been a mess lately, and it wasn’t just hockey. He’d been quiet and even more private than normal.“Yeah, man,” Jeff said. “What’s up?” He had a game to start in a few minutes.“I messed up,” Kent said, his words coming out in a rush. “I didn’t mean to, it just -- you weren’t watching the ceremony, were you?”“You know I don’t watch TV before a game,” said Jeff. He frowned. “What’d you do?”“I think I -- I mean, I -- it just came out, I didn’t mean to say it, I just --”God, Kent was a mess. “Parse.”“I told a reporter I don’t have a boyfriend.” Kent’s voice was very small.Jeff’s frown deepened. “But you do have a boyfriend,” he said, and then his eyes widened. Oh . Fuck.“I -- no, I -- I don’t,” Kent said. “That’s -- how did you --”“Eric sparkle heart peach emoji or whatever? That guy you’ve been texting for months?” Jeff leaned against the wall. The guy Kent was in love with? That was his boyfriend. Wasn’t it? “C’mon, man. I thought, y’know. I thought you’ve had a boyfriend for a while now. Did something happen?”“You knew ?”“Dude, I know what love looks like,” Jeff said. He glanced to the side, where Christopher was waving at him. He needed to go.The only sound that came through the line was Kent’s breathing, just a bit ragged.“Look, Kent, I --” Fuck. He wanted to stay on the phone and say fuck the game, but he knew he couldn’t do that.“He’s not my boyfriend,” Kent said. “He never was, I guess.”Goddamnit. “Are you okay?”Another pause. And then, “no.”“When are you coming home?” Jeff looked at the clock. “Dude, I gotta go. When are you --”“As soon as I can get out of here,” Kent said. “I’m not staying to be interviewed after. The front office is going to kill me. I was supposed to tell the team first, we had a plan, and now -- god, I’m gonna be in so much trouble.”“I’ll see you when you get home,” Jeff said.Kent swallowed. “Yeah,” he said, “okay. Thanks, man.”Jeff got to Kent’s house first. He was just starting to fall asleep on the sofa when he heard to garage door open. Kit jumped off his lap, heading for the door. Jeff followed, leaning in the doorway to wait.Kent came in, still wearing his suit. He looked perfect.“Hey,” Jeff said. He was in pajamas.“You’re still up?”“I said I’d see you when you got home.” Jeff sighed. “You look like shit.”Kent went through to the living room, flopping down onto his sofa. When Jeff joined him, he was rubbing his face with both hands, shoulders hunched.Jeff sat down next to him, slinging his arm across the back of the sofa. It was the closest he could come to wrapping Kent in his arms and never letting go.“I was gonna tell you,” Kent said.“Dude,” said Jeff, “c’mon. Don’t. It’s fine.” After all, Jeff was the king of not revealing important personal information -- wasn’t he?Kent shook his head.“Does your mom know?” Jeff asked.“She does now,” said Kent.Well, fuck. Jeff let his arm fall from the back of the sofa to Kent’s shoulders. “It’s gonna be okay,” he said, and Kent relaxed against him after a moment. He always did. “Go get ready for bed. I’m too tired for some kind of deep conversation tonight, all right? We can just watch Fast and-- ”Kent laughed a little, like Jeff knew he would. “I’m not watching Fast and Furious with you,” he said. “Give it up.”“See? Better already,” Jeff said. He pulled away, standing up. “I’m gonna make Kraft dinner.”“Okay,” said Kent.“I’m also gonna pass out on this sofa in like, twenty minutes,” Jeff said. He ruffled Kent's hair with one hand, keeping the touch gentle.Kent’s smile was small, but it was there.
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
Watching Kent run fingers over his hair, Jeff let out a long breath. He didn’t know why he was nervous -- it was
Kent
who should be nervous. Looking at him again, Jeff recognized the ragged state of Kent’s lower lip as one of his
I haven’t slept in two days
tells. When he caught Kent glancing in his direction, Jeff offered what he hoped was an encouraging smile before Kent turned away to speak with their general manager.
Apparently, PR had planned a press conference for Kent anyway, because he’d been planning to come out in a much more controlled way before the ceremony, according to Sara. Jeff assumed that Kent hadn’t planned to be single at that point, assumed that was why he’d put it off originally, decided not to do it after all.
It sucked so hard that he’d accidentally sort of… lost his mind and done it anyway at that retirement ceremony. Jeff still wasn’t sure what, exactly, had happened. Kent hadn’t really been the same since that night in December when he went to that party at Samwell.
Samwell, in Jeff’s opinion, had to be like some kind of hellmouth.
“Holy shit,” Jeff said, peering out at the crowd. He tugged at his burgundy tie. “That’s a lot of people.”
“Yeah, well, it’s
Parser
,” said Christopher. “Lemme see.” He took a look, winced. “Yikes.”
“Understatement,” muttered Jeff.
“How many of these journalists d’you think actually cover hockey?” Christopher murmured.
“Eh,” said Saints, “I mean, a few. Isy’s out there.”
“Oh,” said Jeff, “
is
she? Are you gonna --”
“Shut up,” Saints said, “whatever you were gonna say, just. Shut up. No.”
Christopher and Jeff both laughed.
“Saints,” said Christopher, “c’mon, I --”
“We gotta get out there,” Tremblay said, interrupting their faint bit of fun.
In truth, it was an awkward presser for all of them. Kent hadn’t asked anyone to accompany him, of course, but Jeff and Christopher couldn’t imagine just letting him do the conference alone. Saints and Tremblay had tagged along, too, both wanting to be supportive. Plus, Tremblay was the Aces’ You Can Play ambassador and thought it was his duty, or something. Not a single one of them was quite ready for the immediate onslaught of questions.
“Kent, how are Aces’ fans reacting to your announcement?”
“How do you think fans from opposing --”
“Was that statement your way of coming out as the first openly gay male in the NHL?”
Fuck, they were relentless. Jeff grit his teeth, glancing at Kent.
“How are things in the locker room --”
“
Kent
, does this mean there was truth to the rumors back when you were the in QMJHL?”
Kent stiffened in his seat next to Jeff.
“What does the Aces’ statement “
proud of all individuals who make up our team
” mean?”
All right, that was it. He couldn’t take it any more. Jeff leaned forward to speak into the mic. “It means we’re proud,” he said, speaking up before Kent had a chance to, “of
all
the individuals who make up our team.” And yeah, okay, maybe his tone was a
little
more ‘you imbeciles’ than necessary, but really? Really? What the fuck else would it mean?
Christopher kicked his ankle under the table while Saints tried not to laugh.
Kent cleared his throat. “First, I just want to say that the Aces organization is amazing, and I’m really lucky to play with such a great team of guys.”
Christopher and Tremblay both smiled.
“Do you have anything to say to LGBT youth that might be looking to you in this moment?” a reporter asked.
“I, um,” Kent said, losing his PR polish for a moment. “Yeah. Um. Just -- okay. Coming out is a personal choice. It's like who you want to marry or where you want to live. We don't pick our sexual orientation, but we do choose who -- and when -- we tell, or not." He paused, glanced at Jeff for a second. “It’s okay to not be ready. But I hope that with greater visibility we’ll see greater acceptance.”
Christopher’s smile was soft.
They only answered a few more questions, all of them trying to steer things toward hockey and the team whenever they could so that nobody could ask Kent super specific questions about stuff they had no business asking about. Tremblay gave a nice little speech about Hockey is for Everyone month. Saints had a few things to say about locker room inclusion and homophobia. Christopher focused on hockey and leadership, both on and off the ice. All in all, it turned out okay.
On the way home, Kent leaned his chin in his hand, staring out Jeff’s passenger window without saying anything. He hadn’t so much as glanced at his phone -- Jeff wasn’t even sure the thing was charged. The silence was unnerving.
“Hey,” Jeff said, keeping his voice soft.
“Mmm.” Kent didn’t look away from the window.
“You okay?” Wincing, Jeff bit the inside of his cheek.
Stupid.
Of course Kent wasn’t okay.
“Fine,” said Kent.
After taking a long breath, Jeff took the exit that would get them to his apartment rather than Kent’s house. It took a bit, but Kent finally turned to look at him, eyes a steely sort of grey. “Jeffrey,” he said.
“We don’t have to talk,” Jeff said, “if you don’t want to. But I’m not just dropping you off at home. And I know I’m not -- look, I’m not Eric, whoever he is, and I know you don’t wanna talk about him, but I do have movies and a craving for takeout Chinese and I’m taking you home with me.”
Kent didn’t say anything else for a long time, not until Jeff parked the Jeep and cut the engine. He was about to open his door when Kent cleared his throat.
“Um,” said Kent.
“Yeah, man?” Jeff turned to look at him.
“Can we get General Tso’s chicken?” Kent asked.
Jeff laughed. “Yeah, bud,” he said. “We can get whatever you want.” He squeezed Kent’s shoulder. “C’mon. I want out of this suit.”
“I can’t believe you wore a suit,” Kent said.
“You wore one,” Jeff pointed out.
“Well, yeah. But --”
“So I wore one,” Jeff said. “I got your back. No big deal.” He jerked his chin toward the door. “C’mon. Gotta let Kevin out.”
Kent ended up falling asleep on the sofa, snuggled up in one of Jeff’s BU hoodies, Kevin draped across his torso. Even asleep his face had that pinched look to it, that stress. Jeff carefully brushed a bit of Kent’s hair back off his face. “Hey, bud,” he said. “You wanna go to bed?”
Kent scrunched his nose a little. “Mmhm.”
Tucked in later, lights off and retainer in, Jeff was just drifting off to sleep when Kent pulled in closer, pressed his damp face to Jeff’s bare shoulder.
“Thanks,” Kent whispered.
Smiling softly, Jeff slid his arm around Kent. “Yeah, man,” he said. “Any time.”
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
Jeff called his mom about every two weeks. She always wanted to hear how things were doing -- things with hockey, with Christopher and Bethany’s kids, with Kent. She always asked about Kent, and in the last year or so, Jeff had gotten the feeling that she was asking for reasons other than the fact that the family liked him.
“I saw the news,” she said, as soon as she picked up. “Is everything okay?”
She meant Kent. “Yeah,” said Jeff. “Things are fine. I mean, mostly. We’re all a little on edge because it’s kind of a big deal, you know.” He shrugged, even though he knew she couldn’t see. Kent's coming out was stressful, and Jeff had tried to make him feel better, but he hadn't really recovered until he'd finally returned his boyfriend's calls.
That hurt. “It’s cool," Jeff said. "I think he’ll be happier, now.”
“I think you’ll both be happier,” she said, using the same tone she used to ask Bethany about the grandbabies. “And now when you come home for the summer, none of us will have to worry about saying the wrong thing --”
“He’s got a boyfriend, mom,” Jeff said, that sick feeling heavy in his stomach.
“Oh!” His mother laughed. “Finally! I’ve been waiting for this -- let me get your father --”
She had the wrong idea. “It’s not me, mom,” said Jeff, softly. “It’s not me.”
“Oh,” she said. And then, “Honey. Did you -- didn’t you say something?”
“No,” Jeff said. “I didn’t.” He looked down at his free hand, scrubbed it on his jeans. “I didn’t know how, mom.”
She didn’t say anything.
“It’s fine,” said Jeff, after they’d both been silent for too long. “His boyfriend’s really nice. And he makes him happy, so --”
“Does that mean he won’t visit for the summer any more?” His mother sounded so utterly disappointed. Kent had been coming to Calgary in the summer for four years now, at least.
Had everyone in his family thought that he and Kent were together? Did everyone know how Jeff felt except for the one person who really needed to know? Had his
whole family
thought of Kent as one of them? He bit his lip. “Mom, I -- I don’t know.”
“Oh, Jeffrey.” She sighed. “I’m so sorry.” She paused. “I thought you were going to marry that boy.”
Jeff’s throat felt tight.
He knew it was stupid, but he
had
thought about it before. Kent seemed so happy in Alberta, it was easy to imagine a life with him up there: raising kids, growing old. Jeff had always known there would never be a future in which he could have three kids with his hair and Kent’s eyes, but daydreams just
happened
, didn’t they? Swallowing, he tried to think of something, anything, to say.
“Jeffrey,” said his mom. “I’m sorry. I know you love that boy.”
“Mom,” Jeff said, hating how watery his voice sounded. He’d never told her that.
“I know,” she said. “But I -- you know, you’ll find someone. I know you will.”
“Yeah,” Jeff said.
He didn’t really believe that.
It was hard to find someone when he couldn’t stop loving Kent. He didn’t want to find someone else.
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
“Why did you have coach take you off my line?” Kent asked.
Wait. Hold on just one fucking minute. “
Excuse
me?” Jeff turned around.
“My line. Why?”
“I didn’t have myself taken off your line,” Jeff said. “I thought
you
asked to have me taken off.”
“Why the fuck would I do that?”
“You tell me!”
They glared at each other for a minute before Kent broke eye contact first. “Just with everything recently,” he said, speaking slowly, “I thought…”
What? Kent thought that Jeff asked to have him taken off his line because he was
gay
? Jesus Christ. “I’ve known you were gay for a long
goddamn
time, Kent,” said Jeff, tone betraying his anger. “That has literally nothing to do with this.” He paused, raking both hands through his hair. “And that’s
fucked up
. I can’t believe you
fucking
thought I would --”
“I’m sorry,” Kent said.
“Dude,” Jeff said, after a moment passed. His voice softened. “You’re -- you’re my
best friend
. I mean, I --
fuck,
dude. I just, I wanna know what it is that I’ve done that’s made you think I’d have a problem with you being gay.”
“Nothing,” Kent said, hunching his shoulders. “I just -- I assumed, all right? The timing matched up.”
Jeff sighed. “I never asked to be moved,” he said.
“Well -- why did you think
I’d
ask to have you moved?” Kent stared at him.
Because you figured out I love you, you idiot.
“Uh --” Jeff shook his head. Not going there. Definitely not. “I don’t know, man. I just assumed.”
“Well, I didn’t,” Kent said.
“Yeah, that’s pretty fucking clear, okay?” Jeff rubbed the back of his neck. Shit. He’d been pissed for nothing all this time. “Well, I’m sure there’s a reason,” he said. “Right?”
“Yeah,” Kent said. “I don’t know what that’d be, but sure.”
It was true that it didn’t really make for better hockey. However, having Jeff on a different line had allowed him to gauge teammates’ reactions to the situation -- not everyone was thrilled. It was pretty easy to convince the guys to play nice, though, and once everyone had figured out that literally nothing had changed, everything seemed fine.
Other teams targeting Kent had helped sway the last few Aces. Nobody wanted someone else going after their captain.
“Don’t worry about it,” Kent said. “It’s fine. Forget I said anything.”
“Yeah, ‘cause
that’s
likely,” Jeff said.
Kent rolled his eyes. “Whatever.”
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
It was a rough game, not that the referees were calling penalties like they should’ve been. Jeff was sure that if someone else took some of the hits Kent took, there’d be way more time spent in the box. As it was, no one wanted to appear to be biased when it came to Kent, which meant that things weren’t being called -- and Kent refused to say anything, which didn’t help.
The first period went without a single goal, and the second saw both teams take one goal each within minutes of each other. Shot after shot on the goals went by without a single point, though the Blackhawks were shooting more often. They just couldn’t get off the defensive, and Jeff was getting dirty looks from Johansson for having to come off the ice to check his blood sugar. The Aces cycled through several line changes in an attempt to change the game’s momentum. There were just two minutes left in the second period as Kent went after the puck, racing along the boards to get to it.
Jeff looked down long enough to see his blood sugar on the monitor, hardly any time at all, and when he looked back up Kane was slamming straight into Kent -- and for such a small guy, it was a huge hit. Jeff was off the bench in an instant, leaning over the side to try and see what had happened. Kent was face down on the ice near the Aces’ bench, unmoving. Jeff leaned forward, trying to see him -- he was right by the stanchion. Kent still wasn’t moving, hadn’t gotten up. Jeff’s stomach felt tight. Fuck.
Kane turned to skate away and took a fist in the face from Keats, a player that, if Jeff remembered correctly, had played with Kent in Juniors. He was tall. He was tall and he was Kane’s own teammate and he was
pissed
. Looking back at Kent, Jeff realized he still wasn’t moving -- and there was blood on the ice.
A lot of blood.
Jeff didn’t remember coming off the bench, but he slammed into Kane with all his body weight.
Referees descended on the fight, struggling to break up both teams’ players amid loud rumbling from the stands. Realizing that he still didn’t know if Kent was okay, Jeff let them pull him off Kane -- fuck him, anyway. He didn’t matter. Kent was the only person that mattered.
Jeff turned, searching for him, was only inches away when Kent started seizing. It probably lasted only a few seconds, but it felt like forever -- Jeff’s throat was tight, his chest hurt, he felt like he was going to vomit. Medics shoved Jeff aside, and he didn’t even have a chance to
ask
if Kent was okay before they were loading him onto a stretcher and removing him from the ice. He tried to follow but Christopher caught him, grabbing the back of his jersey.
“Jeffrey,” he said. “
Jeff
. C’mon, bud. They know what they’re doing.”
There were minutes to go until intermission, and Coach Scott refused to allow Jeff back onto the ice -- which was just as well, because he was going to have to take a penalty for fighting with Kane, anyway, and he wouldn’t have had much time. Instead, Coach Scott sent Jeff back to the dressing room with a warning that he might be removed from the game entirely.
Once he got there, Jeff threw his helmet down in the dressing room, swearing. Jeff knew he needed to sit down, eat something, try to chill the
fuck
out, but he just -- couldn’t. Fuck, what if Kent wouldn’t be able to play any more? What if he really wasn’t going to be okay? What if he
died
?
“Okay, you
have
to calm down.” It was Christopher, which meant the second period was over and everyone was coming back. Jeff turned to look at him just as De los Santos came through the door, throwing his helmet the same way Jeff had thrown his.
“
Fuck
that fucking guy!”
“There’s one period left, boys,” Chris said. “We can still take this.”
“I’m gonna kill him,” said Jeff.
“You’re gonna get ejected from the game,” said Jeeves.
“I don’t care.”
“Well, start caring,” said Coach Scott, entering the dressing room, “or you’re not going back out.”
Going back out?
Going back out?
Did he really think Jeff gave a
fuck
about the game now? Fuck the fucking game!
Christopher put a hand on his shoulder. “Jeff -- they wouldn’t even let you see him right now, anyway. You know that.”
He was right, of course. He was right and Jeff knew it. After all, who was he? A friend. A teammate. He was nobody -- nobody with any right to see Kent in the hospital.
Jeff leaned his hand in his hands.
"I hate this," he said.
Christopher rubbed his back. "I know."
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
Sara sent him to run errands because she was worried he’d freak out -- Jeff was sure of it. And, okay, yeah.
Maybe
he’d gone a little bit crazy on the ice. And
maybe
he’d screamed at a doctor earlier. But that was no reason to --
Well, okay. It was a great reason. And Jeff did feel better having checked on both Kit and Kevin. Sara’d asked him to get some shoes, too, because apparently Kent had visitors, one of which he’d thrown up on.
It irritated Jeff that Kent had visitors before he’d gotten to see him.
Adjusting the bag on his shoulder, Jeff pushed the hospital room door open. “Took me a minute to find some clothes to bring you, Parse, and then I had to go buy some fucking shoes?” He pulled the door to after Sara ducked out to answer her phone. Jeff lifted the bag before turning around. “I just brought you whatever I could find. But it should be fine.” Honestly, he’d just grabbed something out of his drawers at Kent’s house and headed on out.
Kent was in bed, as Jeff expected him to be, but he wasn’t alone. Jeff had not expected
that
. Kent was curled around another man -- Eric. It had to be. He was… smaller than Jeff expected. He didn’t really know what Kent’s type was, he realized, because he’d never asked.
“Hey,” Kent said, sitting up immediately. His voice was a little rough, and he had blood in his hair. Eric turned toward Jeff, regarding him with open curiosity.
“Oh,” Jeff said, because he couldn’t think of a single thing to say. “Eric.”
“That’s me.” Eric held out a hand. He was slim and small and blond, with a warm voice. He was everything Jeff wasn’t.
Trying to keep his face casual, Jeff shook Eric’s hand. “Nice to meet you,” he said.
After a moment, Jeff glanced at Kent. He was holding onto Eric with a tight grip, their arms wound together. Eric brushed his thumb along the skin Kent’s forearm, rhythm gentle and soft.
It hurt. It hurt, but -- “I’m glad you came, Eric,” Jeff said. And he was. Kent needed Eric and Eric showed up. That was everything Jeff wanted for him.
Reaching out, he tucked fingers under Kent’s chin and turned his face to the side. That eye looked awful, bright blood red and swollen. “Hell, Parse. You look like shit,” Jeff murmured.
“I know.” Kent pulled away and rubbed at his face. “I feel like shit. It’s f--”
“Whatever,” Jeff said, cutting Kent off before he could say ‘fine’. He’d just keep insisting nothing was wrong with him, even if everyone around him could see the opposite. “Here. Put some clothes on. At least a shirt, yeah?” He set the backpack on the bed, quickly pulling out a Van Halen t-shirt.
Kent stared at it. “I am not wearing that,” he said.
Typical Kent Parson. “Oh, you wanna go home bare-assed, eh? I had to come in through the back so that no one would try to fuckin' interview me.” Everyone wanted to be the first with news on Kent’s condition. It was a nightmare out there, and Jeff wasn’t exactly inconspicuous. He was certain if he talked to anyone he’d say something he’d regret. “Think Sara'll like dealin' with the fallout of you walkin' out of here half-naked?”
“Fuck you!” Kent’s tone was playful.
Now Jeff was outright grinning. “Feeling better already, I see.” He rubbed the back of his head. “Look, fuck. Put it on. It was easier to grab my clothes.” That and, if he was honest? Jeff liked seeing Kent in his clothes. “You can change when you go home.”
“Why didn’t you bring clothes that actually, y’know, belong to me?”
“Too much work,” Jeff said.
Once Jeff had given the new pair of shoes to Jack Zimmermann and they’d all confirmed that yes, Kent had puked on his feet, Jeff found himself glancing around the room. He didn’t know what to say. Everything felt -- weird, weird and different, with someone in Kent’s bed and the distinct feeling of distance pooling in between Jeff’s shoulders. It was a relief when Sara opened the door to check on them.
Kent, already out of the hospital gown entirely, pulled the Van Halen shirt on over his head. His St. Michael medal caught in the neck of the shirt for just a moment. “We’re just waiting on a doctor,” he said, tugging at it. “It might be a while.” He paused, then looked at Jeff again. “You brought pants, right?”
“Yeah.” Of course. Jeff tossed Kent a pair of jeans. “So -- I’m supposed to take these two to your place to rest, or something?” Those were Sara’s instructions.
Go get Kent’s visitors and take them to his house to rest, it’s pretty important to him -- I’m counting on you.
“I’m just followin’ orders. And --” Jeff paused, watching Kent as he wriggled around under the covers. “What are you doing?”
“I’m putting on pants!” Kent huffed.
“You know, you can just put those on like normal, what’s the big deal --”
“Not in front of Sara!” Kent hissed, flushing a little.
“She doesn’t care!” Jeff said. He laughed. Kent was ridiculous, like always. It was… confidence inspiring. Maybe he really was feeling better.
“I’ll turn around,” Sara offered.
Kent let out an exasperated sigh. “Fuck you. Both.” He glanced at Jack. “All. Well --” He smiled at Eric, and the heat in that smile twisted in Jeff’s stomach. “Not you.
Well.
Not --”
“Kent,” Jeff said. “C’mon, man.”
Kent sighed again. “Did you --”
“I checked on your cat after the game,” Jeff said. It had to be what he wanted to know, right? “She was fine.”
Kent paused in his below-the-sheets wriggling. “You saw my cat and you can’t even get clothes for me? You dick!”
“Yeah, ’cause you think clothes are more important than your cat. Is that what you’re saying? I’m gonna tell her you don’t love her any--”
“So you forgot,” Kent said.
“Yeah,” said Jeff, because it was easier than telling the truth, “I forgot. So sue me.”
Jack was already re-packing his bag. He’d put the shoes on without another word. Eric, on the other hand, didn’t move from Kent’s bed at all. Jeff glanced at him again when Jack stood up. He was supposed to be taking both of them -- wasn’t he? “Ready?” he asked.
“I’ve got everything,” Jack said.
“I’m not going,” Eric said.
“But --” Kent sat up again.
“I’m not havin’ this conversation again, baby,” Eric said.
God, he called him baby. He called him baby and threaded gentle fingers through his hair and Jeff -- Jeff needed to leave.
Eric laid back against the pillow. “C’mon,” he said to Kent, “We’re staying here. Those boys can -- oh!” He sat back up. “Lemme get y’all a grocery list. Is that okay?”
Jeff glanced at Kent and sighed. “Yeah,” he said. “I’ve got some time. It’s fine.”
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
Kent let out a loud groan, raking his hands through his hair. “Fuck!” He was sitting cross legged on the hotel bed, laptop in front of him.“What?” Jeff looked up from his issue of the Journal of Early Childhood Research. “Problem?”“I just --” Kent shoved at his laptop. “I got a C on this rough draft, fuck. There’s like, eighteen pages of corrections in here, I swear to God.”“Oh,” Jeff said. School stuff? He was good at school stuff. It had been some years since he had to write anything for a class, but -- well, he’d been good at papers. And Kent looked so frustrated. “You want me to look at it?”Kent glanced at him.“I really don’t mind,” Jeff said.Kent looked down at his computer. “Yeah,” he said, after a long minute, “okay. It’s not gonna get worse, anyway.”Jeff set his journal aside and got up, stretching a little. “All right,” he said. “What class is this?”“Uh - Comp III,” Kent said, glancing away from him.“Okay.” Jeff sat on the edge of the bed. “Can I see?”Kent shoved the laptop at him.Jeff pulled it onto his lap, scanning the document. Kent’s professor was right -- it wasn’t very good. Math was clearly Kent’s strong point when it came to school. “Well,” he said, after a minute.“It sucks,” said Kent. “Right?” He groaned and fell back against the pillows. “ Fuck ! I can’t make an appointment with the writing center because our schedule is insane and I’m just --”“Whoa, whoa, whoa,” Jeff said, “shut up, man. It’s not that bad. I’ll help you. Why didn’t you ask me before?”Kent shrugged one shoulder.“I would’ve helped you,” Jeff said. He paused. “What do you find hard about this?”“Everything,” Kent said.Jeff rolled his eyes. “Don’t be petulant, Parse.” He looked over at him. Kent was draped over the pillows, as dramatic as ever. “Come on. What’s the hardest thing about writing this paper?”It took a few minutes and a bit more urging, but eventually Kent was sitting up next to him, talking through the assignment. Between the two of them, they went over the process of writing an analytical paper.Eventually Kent had a decent draft started. He took direction well, and while he had a little trouble organizing his thoughts, with a bit of encouragement he was doing okay. Jeff looked at the clock when he felt hungry, surprised to see that a few hours had passed. “Aw, man,” he said, “we gotta go to bed. Our flight is in like 2 hours.”“Oh, fuck.” Kent saved the document. “You didn’t have to stay so late.”“It’s fine,” Jeff said, standing. “I don’t mind.”“Your degree is in teaching, isn’t it?” Kent asked.“Yeah. Well -- early childhood education,” Jeff said, “so. I mean, not like college stuff or anything.”“You’re good at it,” Kent said, voice soft. “Thanks.”Jeff ruffled Kent’s hair. “Don’t worry about it. I don’t mind.”“You did good in school, huh?” Kent was still looking down at his computer.Picking up his journal, Jeff shrugged. “I graduated cum laude ,” he admitted. “It’s pretty good. I mean, not the best? But pretty good.”Kent smiled. “Of course you did.” He rubbed the back of his neck. “Uh -- do you mind maybe helping me, um. When I’m done with this draft again, would you look at it, maybe?”“Yeah, man!” Jeff looked for his shoes. “Any time. C’mon. Go to bed, we gotta get up in like an hour.”Laughing, Kent shook his head. “I’m just gonna sleep on the plane,” he said. “You can take a nap if you want. You already packed your shit?”“Dude. C’mon.” Jeff threw himself back onto the bed. “Fine. Wake me up in an hour.”“Yeah, yeah.” Kent scooted around, putting his computer back on his lap. “One hour. ‘Night.”Jeff smiled, reaching over to shut off the lamp. “‘Night, Parser.”
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
Jeff woke up feeling stiff and sweaty, his mouth sour from sleep. Sitting up on one elbow, he blinked. He was at his own apartment, in his own bed, with Kevin in between his legs. A soft noise to his right caught his attention and he turned his head.Kent was asleep in a chair, one of his textbooks propped open across his belly. He’d slumped over, head leaning against one hand, and he was wearing that t-shirt that said ‘so… i went home and cried’ on the front of it. Jeff frowned. What were they doing at his place? Clearing his throat, he reached out and nudged Kent’s knee.Kent jerked awake all at once, his book falling to the floor. He rubbed his face with one hand. “Sh-- Jeff.” He bent to pick up the book. “Hey, buddy. You feel any better?”Jeff blinked. “What’re you doing here?” he asked. His voice was hoarse.“Well, you have the flu,” Kent said, as if it were obvious. “I’m helping you. You don’t remember going to the doctor, huh? Your fever was pretty intense.”Jeff frowned. He did not remember that.“You puked on the bus after the game,” Kent said, helpfully, “and you passed out in my living room.”Ah. Yeah. He did remember the puking, actually. Sitting all the way up, Jeff rubbed the back of his neck. It was stiff. “Uh -- how long have you been here?” Kevin whacked her tail against the bed, staring at him.“Since I went to get your prescription from the pharmacy,” Kent said. He checked his watch. “Oh. Hang on, just a second.”When he returned, Kent handed Jeff water and a pill. “There,” he said. “Take it. I’ll make you some soup, okay?”Jeff looked at the pill in Kent’s hand.“It’s Tamiflu,” Kent said. He waited.Taking the medicine, Jeff drained the glass of water before handing it back to Kent. “Happy now?” he asked.“Yes,” Kent said. “I’ll be right back.” He took the glass and left again, leaving the bedroom door open.Jeff slid out of bed, wanting to wash his face. His knees felt a little weak, and he paused in the hallway, putting a hand out against the wall. Sometimes being tall was… hard. He could hear Kent on the phone in the other room.“Hey, you,” Kent said, his voice soft. “Yeah! No, he’s awake now. Yeah, I wanted to ask you -- you remember when I was in the hospital and you came -- yeah, I know, I know you’re not going to forget that, but --” he paused. “Eric! C’mon! I wanna know how you made the soup.” There was another pause and then soft laughter. "I love you, too."Jeff made it to his bathroom and splashed cold water over his face, letting out a heavy breath. God, it felt like his teeth were wearing sweaters. He slowly brushed them, leaning on the counter with one hand. Kevin stood in the doorway, watching him, and he paused to scratch behind her ear.When he left the bathroom a few minutes later, Kevin trailing after him, Kent was in the kitchen.“What do you need?” Jeff asked.“You to sit down,” Kent said. “Go on. I’ll get you some water.”“I’m fine,” said Jeff. It was a lie, if he was honest -- his entire body was aching and he felt weirdly dizzy.“Dude, you have the actual flu. All those people in 1918 disagree,” Kent said. He handed Jeff a glass of water. “Go. Sit down, fuck. I got this.”“I --”“Jeffrey Roland Troy,” Kent said, trying to mimic Jeff’s mother’s warning tone.“Fine, fine.” Jeff took his water and went to the sofa.He woke back up when Kent nudged him a little. “Mm?”“I made soup,” Kent said. “You should eat it and go back to bed.” He sat down next to Jeff on the sofa. “C’mon.”“I’m not hungry,” Jeff said. His head hurt. Sitting up, he twisted his head to one side, cracking his neck. “Ugh. I’ll just -- I’m just gonna go to bed, yeah? I’m fucking tired.”“You have to eat something,” Kent insisted. “Just a little bit, okay?”“Dude, I’m --” Jeff rubbed his face. Kent wasn’t going to let up. “Fine. Fine. Give it to me.”Kent handed him the bowl. Once Jeff started eating, Kent got up to clean the kitchen. It sounded like he was doing laundry, too, maybe?It took Jeff a little while to get through his bowl of soup. It was delicious, but eating took energy that he just didn’t seem to have. He took the bowl to the sink and set it down, but carried the water with him to his bedroom. Pausing in the doorway, he frowned.“What’re you doing?”“Putting clean sheets on the bed,” Kent said. He tugged on the sheet one more time before adding a blanket. “There.”Jeff sat on the bed. “I’ll see you later, I guess,” he said.“Oh,” said Kent. “You don’t want me to stay?”Jeff looked up at him. He did want Kent to stay, he wanted Kent to stay and curl up in bed with him and play those ocean sounds on his phone until Jeff fell asleep, but -- but Kent had a boyfriend. Jeff needed to respect that. “I --”A flash of hurt crossed Kent’s face and he took a step back, quickly schooling his features into a placid expression. “All right,” he said, “it’s cool. I get it. Just -- I’ll leave your medicine by your bed, okay?”“Kent, I --”“I gotta check on Kit, anyway.” Kent ducked out of the room and returned in a few minutes, setting a pill bottle on Jeff’s night table. “Right. I’ll see you, okay?”Damnit. “Kent,” said Jeff.“Yeah?” Kent paused in the doorway.“My head hurts,” Jeff said, lying just a little. “Will you just, uh. Stay? And do that pressure thing?” Even if he didn’t have a migraine, it would make him feel better.After hesitating for a moment, Kent smiled a soft little smile. “Yeah,” he said. “Okay.”
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
Pulling on the fabric of his tie, Jeff narrowed his eyes at his reflection. Holy shit, he did it. The knot looked right. It was fancy and neat and even. It looked awesome. Didn’t it?
Hell yeah, it did. Running a hand over his hair, he grinned at the mirror. Honestly? He looked fucking
good
. The royal blue Kiton suit fit him perfectly. He’d taken it to a tailor just like Kent usually told him to, even though he’d purchased it by himself.
Noise from the hallway caught his attention. “Oi!” Someone banged on his door. “Are you ready yet? We’re gonna be la--”
Yanking the hotel room door open, Jeff grinned at Kent. “I’m ready,” he said. “Are
you
?”
Kent stared at him for a moment before snapping his mouth shut. He didn’t say a word. He was wearing that dark green suit of his, the one Jeff liked so much.
“What?” Jeff tugged at the hem of his jacket. Sure, it was a different look for him, but he liked it! Wasn’t Kent always saying he ought to wear nicer suits? Did it look weird?
“Uh --” Kent swallowed. “New suit?”
“Yeah.” Jeff looked down. He’d thought it was a nice color. Was it not? He frowned. “What’s wrong with it?”
“Absolutely fucking
nothing
,” Kent breathed. He just stood there, unmoving.
After a minute, Jeff grabbed his things. “O--kay,” he said. “C’mon. We’re gonna be late. Isn’t that what you were saying?”
Kent followed him down the hall. “I was, yeah. I mean, we’re probably on time, now. When did you -- when did you get this
suit
?”
Jeff pushed the elevator button and laughed. “I don’t know, like, a month ago?”
“A month ago,” Kent repeated.
“I got it tailored like you said.” Jeff looked up at the elevator numbers. “I just got it back last week.” Looking over his shoulder, he grinned. “Stop staring!” When the elevator door opened, he stepped in.
“I’m just not used to seeing you in something like that,” Kent said, pushing the button for the ground floor before turning to face him. “You know, looking nice?” He laughed. “Did Bethany help you?”
“Rude!” said Jeff. “And no. I picked it myself, you dick. I
did
listen to you when we went shopping, you know.”
Kent stepped closer, reached out to touch the shoulder of the jacket. “It’s really nice,” he said. “For real, man. It looks great.”
Jeff grinned. “Thanks, Captain.”
Kent shot him a glare.
“It’s Kiton,” Jeff added.
Kent rubbed the fabric of one of the lapels between his fingers. “I noticed.” Glancing up at Jeff, he ran his tongue over his lower lip, hand still on Jeff’s chest. “I --”
The elevator dinged and Kent jerked away before the door opened, running a hand over his hair as he cleared his throat. The doors slid open and he stepped out first, leaving Jeff to take a deep breath in the elevator before following.
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
“Hey, Swoops?”“What’s up?” Jeff rubbed at his hair with a towel.“Did I see you and Parser at La Jolla the other night?” De los Santos was eyeing him with suspicion.“Oh --” Jeff looked up, arms halfway into his shirt. Shit, had he seen them dancing together ? Jeff was still learning, so Kent usually danced a song or two with him every time they went out. It didn’t feel like a big deal to Jeff anymore, but he realized that it could be to someone on the team. Shit. “Uh,” he said, “yeah. Probably, I mean. Parse has been teaching me how to --”“Since when are you going out there?” De los Santos crossed his arms over his chest. “And why didn’t you ask me if I wanted to go?”Oh! He was just pissed he hadn’t been included? Thank fuck. “I didn’t think about it, man,” Jeff said, relaxing a little. He pulled his shirt over his head. “I mean, you know how Parse is --”“I can’t believe you went there without me,” De los Santos continued. “I bet you can’t even dance.”“Hey!” Jeff tugged his shirt down. “I’m learning! And Parse is the one who decided to go there, anyway. Maybe he just didn’t think anyone else would wanna go!”“Bullshit!” De los Santos shot him a contemptuous look. “You better take me next time. I’m not fucking around.”“All right, all right,” said Jeff, “fuck. I’ll tell him.” He wasn’t sure how well that would go over with Kent, but it didn’t hurt to ask. He could use a bit more team interaction anyway, beyond performance for team events or media.Their teammates didn’t actually get that much genuine Kent Parson. There was media Kent Parson and then there was Captain Kent Parson -- both separate from the person Kent Parson was at home, where other people didn’t see him, where he knew he wouldn’t be recorded or photographed or mentioned in interviews. Jeff wasn’t sure other guys on the team really knew that, though. They had a completely different perception of Kent than he did, a lot of the time, and most of them acted like Christopher was the captain -- just not on the ice.Two weeks later when they got home after a long roadie, Jeff met Kent at his house after practice. “Hey man, you wanna go dancing tonight?”Kent swallowed his mouthful of chicken. “Yeah,” he said. “Sounds good. We haven’t been in a while!”Jeff took a bit of sweet potato off Kent’s plate. “Cool,” he said. “Uh. Can I bring Saints with us?” He stuffed the potato into his mouth.Kent frowned. “Why?”Swallowing, Jeff picked up another bit of potato. “I guess he saw us there a couple weeks ago. Was pissed we didn’t ask him to come,” Jeff said. He shrugged. “It’ll be fun. He’s chill, you know that.”“All right,” Kent said, but he didn’t sound thrilled.“It’s not gonna be weird,” Jeff said. He ate the last of Kent’s sweet potato.Kent picked his plate up and carried it to the sink. “I said all right, didn’t I?”Jeff sent a quick text to Saints. La Jolla? meet u there , Saints sent back.Jeff drove to the club with Kent in the passenger’s seat of his Jeep, staring out the window. Jeff glanced at him several times before sighing. “Dude,” he said. “If you didn’t want me to tell him he could come, you should have said something.”“I said it’s fine,” Kent said, not looking away from the window.“Then act like it,” said Jeff.Kent looked at him for a minute. “Sorry,” he said.Jeff shrugged. When he pulled in to park, Kent grabbed at his arm before he could open his door. “Hey,” he said.“Hey yourself,” said Jeff.“Don’t tell Saints I was being a dick,” Kent said. “Please?”“I won’t.” Jeff smiled. “C’mon. We’re here to have fun.”They found Saints just inside the club, sliding his phone back into his pocket. He obviously hadn’t been there long. “Hey, guys.”Kent grinned. “Hey,” he said. “Sorry I didn’t think about asking if you wanted to come before!”“I forgive you,” said Saints. “ This time, bro.”Kent laughed. They headed to the bar, chattering a little about hockey before Saints groaned. “Guys. No hockey talk in the club, all right?” He glanced at Jeff. “Well, unless you’re using it to impress a lady.”“I’ll give you a personal pass for that,” Jeff said. “You probably need it.”“Shut up, man --” A new song started and Saints perked up immediately. “Oh, fuck, El Perdon -- Parse!” De los Santos shoved his drink at Jeff and grabbed for Kent’s hand. “Baila conmigo!”Kent tilted his head to finish all of his drink at once before slamming the glass down. “Why the fuck not?” he said, and before Jeff could say anything, he was gone. He looked down at the glass in his hand before glancing out at the dance floor. It took him a minute to find Kent and Saints among all the other dancers.And, okay. Kent and De los Santos were dancing together -- really close together, and they looked great doing it. Saints obviously loved that song, and Kent looked genuinely happy. Jeff’s grip tightened on his glass. They were both good dancers, and Saints didn’t seem worried whatsoever about the fact that they were two guys dancing together in a public club. He certainly wasn’t worried about where his hands were. Kent was following, like he did when he danced with Jeff, but it was definitely a much… sexier version of when he danced with Jeff.Probably because he wasn’t trying to teach Saints anything. Both of them knew what they were doing. It was, in all honesty, probably more fun that way. Jeff tossed the rest of his whiskey back quickly, swallowing against the burn.God, it was going to be a long night.
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
Jeff’s phone was ringing. It was Kent’s ringtone -- the
Boy Meets World
theme song. Jeff was standing under the hottest water his shower could provide with the head set on the hardest massaging water setting. Damnit.
Reaching one arm out of the shower, he grabbed for his phone and leaned forward to keep it out of the shower spray as he jabbed the button to put it on speaker. “What’s up?”
On the other end of the line, Kent took a single breath before hanging up.
Well, shit. Jeff shut the shower off and got out, grabbing for his towel as he pushed the button to call Kent back. “Pick up your phone, asshole,” he muttered, roughly drying off while the phone rang. It went to voicemail and Jeff swore, putting the phone down long enough to grab clothes and pull them on.
He was just typing out a text to Kent when a knock at his door startled him enough that he dropped his phone. Jeff went to the door immediately, yanking it open. Kent stood on his doorstep, eyes red behind his glasses, face a bit splotchy. He was an absolute mess in his dad’s old Minnesota North Stars hoodie, hands in pockets and shoulders a little hunched.
“I’m sorry,” he started to say, “I --”
Jeff reached out, pulling Kent in through the door to hug him. It took a few seconds before Kent hugged him back, but when he did he wound his arms around Jeff’s waist with a heartbreaking sense of desperation. “It’s fine,” Jeff said, tightening his grip just a little.
“I know it’s late, I’m sorry -- I don’t know what I’m doing here,” Kent said, as Jeff shut and locked the front door. “I just didn’t, uh. I just wanted to get out of my house for a while.”
“You know you can come here whenever, man,” Jeff said. “You didn’t even have to knock.” Kent had a key. Jeff glanced at him. “What’s wrong?”
Kent made himself busy with taking off his shoes, looking down at his feet. “Just -- just a shit night, you know?”
No. Jeff didn’t know at all. “You wanna sit down?” he asked. Sometimes it took some persistence to get things out of Kent. He’d learned that well enough their rookie year.
Jeff’s mother always made mint tea when someone wanted to talk. He wasn’t sure how it worked, but the mint seemed to make things better and the warmth of the tea made it easier to talk. Stepping into his kitchen, he flipped the switch on his electric kettle and took a large mug down from the cupboard. Dumping mint tea into it, he took a deep breath while waiting for the water to boil. Kent was just sitting on the sofa, stroking his hand over Kevin’s head.
The kettle didn’t take long. Once the mug was filled with hot water, Jeff took it out to the living room and handed it to Kent. “Here,” he said.
Kent glanced up before taking the mug, wrapping both hands around it.
Jeff sat next to him, waiting. After a few minutes passed and Kent had sipped his tea, Jeff tilted his head. Kent glanced at him.
“I’m assuming you being here has something to do with your boyfriend,” Jeff said.
Kent looked back down at his tea. “Yeah,” he said. His eyes had that puffy, I’ve-been-crying look to them.
“I’ll kill him,” Jeff said, in the most matter-of-fact way possible, and it scared him how much he meant it.
“It’s my fault,” Kent said, ignoring Jeff’s words. “I sort of -- well, I agreed to something I didn’t really want to do.”
What?
Was that how their relationship worked?
Jeff frowned. “Dude,” he said, slowly, “I’m not, um. I’m not like, an expert on relationships or anything --”
Kent snorted.
Ignoring him, Jeff continued. “-- But I think, y’know. I think if someone loves you they don’t ask you to hurt yourself like this for them.” Did Eric know Kent at all?
“I didn’t say --”
“I know you, Kent, so you can cut the shit, all right?” Jeff sighed, running his hands through his hair. Fuck. “Look. I know you love him. But, you --” What could he even say? That Kent deserved better?
He did. Kent deserved someone who wouldn’t hurt him on purpose. He deserved a relationship he felt safe and wanted in. He deserved someone who wanted to wake up with him and go to sleep with him, someone who knew his favorite foods and favorite songs and could make him laugh.
He deserved the world.
“I’m really tired.” Kent’s soft voice cut through Jeff’s thoughts.
“Yeah,” Jeff said. “I know. You wanna lay down?”
Kent nodded.
Jeff went down the hall first. The light was still on in his room, and he bent to pick his towel up off the floor. When he turned, Kent was in the doorway, soft and exhausted.
“Lay down,” Jeff said. “It’s fine.”
He didn’t even protest. Instead, Kent set his cup on the nightstand and climbed into bed, curling up into a ball. Kevin jumped up after him, curling up in the middle of him to steal his warmth. Jeff sat on the edge of the bed, put a hand on Kent’s shoulder.
“You can stay the night, if you want,” he offered. “I can sleep out on my cou--”
“You don’t have to do that,” Kent said.
Jeff squeezed Kent’s shoulder. “All right.”
Sometimes, Kent liked to be alone. Jeff checked the cup and, finding it empty, picked it up. “I’ll be right back, okay?”
“Mm.” Kent was scratching Kevin’s head.
Taking the mug to the kitchen, Jeff rinsed it. This time, the ring of his doorbell didn’t surprise him.
It had to be Eric.
Ignoring it, Jeff went to the living room and turned on the
Antiques Roadshow
.
The doorbell rang again. After a few minutes, it was followed by some insistent knocking. Jeff sighed as his text message alert chimed.
You can’t make me stand out here all night,
Eric’s message said.
Jeff let out a dark laugh.
Wanna bet?
he sent back.
Ten full minutes later, Jeff opened the door, but not enough to allow Eric entrance. “What do you want?” he asked, leaning in his doorway, making sure he filled it.
“Is Kent here?” Eric asked. He was eyeing Jeff in that sort of terrified way people usually did when they realized how much bigger Jeff was than they were.
“I don’t know,” Jeff said, glancing down the hallway.
“Jeff,” Eric said, “please. Let me talk to him.”
What if Kent didn’t want to talk to Eric? He’d left his own house to get away from him, after all. “I don’t know that he wants to talk to you,” Jeff said.
“Please,” said Eric.
Jeff didn’t move. “I’m not sure I want you in my place, Eric.”
There was a long moment of silence before Eric spoke again. “I’m not leaving. I’ll sit out here all night if I have to. I’m not leaving until I see him.”
Was that supposed to be some kind of threat? Jeff didn’t give a fuck if Eric sat in the hallway all night. Why should he let him in? “What happened?” he asked.
Eric swallowed. “I… asked Kent to do something I shouldn’t have,” he said.
Jeff frowned, waiting. That wasn’t good enough.
A deep flush darkened Eric’s face and neck. “Something, uh, intimate,” he admitted. “With -- with someone else.”
Wait just one goddamn fucking minute. Something
intimate
? So -- their conversation in the dressing room, then, that was about a
threesome
?
What the everloving actual
fuck
.
Eric asked
Kent
to have a threesome with someone. Kent. Kent ‘I go to church every Sunday’ Parson. Kent romantic comedy and romance novels Parson. What in the world could possibly have given Eric the idea that Kent would ever be okay with something like that?
Oh, right. Kent did. He said he’d do something he didn’t want to do.
Jeff clenched his jaw. He swallowed, turning away from Eric for a second, muttering in Stoney. “
I can’t believe I’m doing this
.”
Turning back to Eric, Jeff didn’t bother to lower his voice. “Do you know him at
all
?” he asked, tone harsh. “How could you --”
“It was stupid.” Eric rubbed the back of his neck with one hand. “I thought it would be fun -- I thought
we
would have fun. It was stupid, but to be fair, he mentioned it first. I, um. Look, it’s complicated, okay?”
Oh, no. Jeff couldn’t take much more of this. “Stop talking,” he said. He ran a hand through his hair before pulling back, opening the door a little wider. Motioning Eric in, he pulled the door closed after them. “Sit,” he said. “In the living room.”
Eric took himself to the living room and sat on Jeff’s sofa. He stared around Jeff’s apartment with a lost, faintly scared expression. Joining him in the living room, Jeff threw himself into an armchair. He looked at Eric and waited, saying nothing.
After a moment, Eric squirmed a little. “Did he talk to you?” he asked.
“No,” said Jeff, because Kent hadn’t. Not really. “He didn’t need to.” He leaned his cheek against his hand. “It was pretty obvious that you fucked up.”
Clearly uncomfortable under his scrutiny, Eric twisted his hands together. “I didn’t mean to,” he said. “And I thought if he didn’t want to do… things… he’d say no, so --”
“Look,” said Jeff, “I don’t know what happened, all right? I’m not gonna pretend like I do. But you -- he --” He pinched the bridge of his nose. How could Eric and Kent have been dating for over a
year
and Jeff still needed to explain this? “I think whoever his ex-boyfriend was, he maybe…” Hurt him. A lot. Kent was so afraid of being himself with people, it was why he had his hockey persona, why he so carefully crafted his public face. “It’s just, Kent acts like somebody that’s been abused, okay?” He paused. “He won’t -- he’s just gonna do whatever he thinks you want him to do.”
And you shouldn’t have let him think he had to.
“Well, I -- I don’t think his ex-boyfriend hit him, if that’s what you mean,” Eric said, immediately trying justify himself. “I --”
“No, fuck you,” Jeff said, anger burning in his stomach. “
That’s
what you have to say for yourself?” Just, ‘I don’t think his ex-boyfriend was physically abusive’? That was it? Nothing about how Eric hadn’t bothered to actually figure out what Kent needed, how he’d just done whatever he wanted and damn the consequences? “You took advantage of him, and I know he’s not gonna say it, but I will. Seriously,
fuck you
.”
Eyes wide, Eric sucked in a sharp breath. He looked stricken.
“You don’t deserve him,” Jeff continued. He didn’t care if Kent heard, not any more. “And he damn sure doesn’t deserve this.”
“I know that.” Eric whispered. His eyes were glassy. “I didn’t know it was gonna turn out like this.”
Yeah? He should have.
Jeff shifted in his chair. They were both quiet for a moment before Jeff broke the silence. He had to know. “Who was the other person?” he asked, voice quiet.
“It was Jack,” Eric said, not looking up from his knees. He looked pathetic, all hunched shoulders and sick guilt.
Holy shit. “Jack
Zimmermann
?” Jeff stared. He was sure he looked as shocked as he felt. Why ask him? Jeff hadn’t even considered the possibility that he could be gay. Did that mean --
Eric looked up at him, frowning. His eyes searched Jeff’s face for a minute. “He didn’t tell you?” he asked.
Tilting his head, Jeff eyed Eric for a second. “Tell me what?”
“Um…” Eric chewed on his lip, glancing away.
Right. Clearly something that Eric didn’t think he needed to share. Was it about Zimmermann? Was it -- all those rumors about Kent and Jack back in juniors. Were those
true
?
Damn. Did that make Jack Zimmermann Kent’s ex-boyfriend?
“Yeah,” said Jeff, said slowly, filling the silence, “okay.” Obviously Kent and Eric needed to talk. He crossed his arms over his chest, sighing. “He’s in the bedroom,” he said. “I’ll go see if he wants to see you.” After stopped for a glass of water in the kitchen, Jeff headed down the hall to his bedroom.
The door creaked as he pushed it open. “Hey, man,” he said. “You awake? I brought you some water.”
“Eric’s here, isn’t he?” Kent didn’t move from his huddle in Jeff’s bed, curled up with Kevin.
“Yeah. D’you want me to send him away?” Jeff asked. “Because I’ll send him away right now.”
“It’s okay,” Kent said. “You don’t have to send him away.”
Jeff sighed. “You want me to send him back here, then?”
Kent shrugged one shoulder. “I guess.”
Chewing his lower lip, Jeff stood there for a moment. The room was dark and cool and if Jeff were a stronger person, he wouldn’t have let Eric in at all. He would’ve told Kent that he loved him and stayed to hold him and everything would’ve been --
He took a breath. Kent loved Eric. And he didn’t want Eric to leave. “Okay,” Jeff said, and left the room.
When he returned to the living room and cleared his throat behind the sofa, Eric jerked a little. “You can go back there,” Jeff said. He sat on his sofa, weariness deep in his bones.
A wave of relief passed over Eric’s face. “All right.” Eric stood up, brushing at his thighs with both hands. He looked nervous. It took no time for him to turn for the hall, to start walking. It was just --
Jeff swallowed. “Hey, Eric?”
Eric turned, looking back.
“He loves you,” said Jeff.
“I know,” said Eric. He bit his lip. “I love him, too, Jeff.”
“Yeah. Please don’t --” Jeff stopped, looked up at his ceiling, sighed. “Please don’t hurt him any more, Eric.”
“I didn’t mean to hurt him at all,” Eric said, voice gentle and soft.
Yeah.
Right.
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
Standing out in the hall, Jeff leaned his head back for a second, looking up at the ceiling.
Fuck. He was such a shitty best friend.
They’d had to leave on a roadie two days after Eric left, and Jeff had yet to really
talk
to Kent since the night he’d come over. He was certain Kent had heard him yell at Eric, and he had no idea what Eric had said about the whole situation. But they’d both come to family day like nothing had happened, and -- and Eric was great with Christopher’s kids, he was great with everyone, and Jeff didn’t know how to feel about that.
It ate at him, making him feel awkward and off-balance. He and Kent didn’t go days without really talking, that wasn’t how their relationship worked. And Kent -- surely he needed to talk after something like that, no matter how painful it might be for Jeff. It wasn’t Kent’s fault that he didn’t love Jeff back. Shit, he didn’t even know how Jeff felt, and that wasn’t his fault, either.
Lifting a hand, Jeff knocked.
Kent opened the door, the faint sheen of silvery glitter dusting his collarbone where it was visible from the fit of his loose shirt. Jeff could smell citrus and flowers. “Swoops,” Kent said, “what’s up?” He took a step back from the door, allowing Jeff inside.
“You just out of the bath?” Jeff asked.
“Yeah.” Kent turned away, walking further into the room without looking back.
“It’s just --” Jeff shut the door behind him before turning to face Kent. He’d already sat back down on the bed and was holding the television remote, turning the volume down. It was on a home makeover show. “I was, you know. I just wanted to talk to you.”
Kent glanced at him. “Am I in trouble?” he asked.
Jeff sat on the end of the bed. “Am I?” he asked.
Tilting his head, Kent looked away from him, setting the remote down on the bedside table. “That’s -- no, man. C’mon. I’m --”
“I probably shouldn’t have yelled at your boyfriend,” Jeff said.
“Maybe,” Kent said.
“I was just worried about you.” He shook his head. Fuck. “I mean, you show up at my place and you’re obviously upset and then you guys come to family day like it’s nothing and we haven’t
talked
, and we don’t
do
that, and it’s just --” he swallowed. “I feel weird.”
Kent was looking at his knees. “I feel weird, too,” he said. “I’m not
mad
at you. But you don’t, um.” He looked up. “You don’t know anything about my relationship, so.”
That wasn’t, in Jeff’s opinion, strictly true. He’d seen how Kent looked when he was on the phone with Eric, had seen them on Skype together. They were obviously happy -- they looked at each other the way Christopher and Bethany did.
And Jeff knew
Kent
, knew that he probably tried his best to make Eric happy no matter what that meant.
“Yeah,” said Jeff. “I, uh.” He rubbed the back of his neck. “I realized that. And so I thought you might... want to tell me about it?”
Kent’s brow furrowed. “What?”
“Eric,” Jeff said. “I thought you might want to tell me about him.”
Kent leaned back against a pillow. “What about him?”
Jeff shrugged. “Everything. Whatever you want me to know.” He grinned. “I mean, I don’t need, like.
Details
about your sex life, but --”
Kent threw a pillow at his face.
Jeff caught it. “You know, the normal gossip shit. How’d you meet him? What’s he in school for? D’you like his parents? You know. Shit like that.” The stuff he knew Kent probably wanted, but didn’t dare, to tell his mom.
“Are you saying you wanna have girl time right now?” Kent asked.
“Boy time,” Jeff said, “actually. Scoot over.”
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
Ugh, his phone was ringing. Jeff dropped his bread into the toaster slots before picking up. “Hello?”
“Hey, Jeff,” Christopher said.
“Hey, man. What’s up?” Jeff pushed the lever on the toaster, shoving his bread down into it.
“You busy?”
Jeff frowned. “No,” he said, “but if you’re looking for a babysitter you know Kent would do anything to hold Teddy for the next million years.” He took the peanut butter out of his cabinet.
“Nah, I’m not looking for a babysitter,” Christopher said. “I was just gonna see if you wanted to hang out.”
Really? Was something wrong? “Oh,” said Jeff, “uh, sure? I just put bread in the toaster. You wanna come over?”
“Sure,” Christopher said.
About a half hour later, Christopher was lounging in Jeff’s living room, both of them trying in a half-assed manner to kick the other’s ass on NHL 15.
“I can’t believe we’re literally playing a hockey video game,” Christopher said.
“You’re just mad your stats weren’t better in here,” said Jeff, and Christopher laughed.
“A little bit, yeah.”
Over lunch, Christopher kept giving Jeff
looks
. They were irritating, obvious looks, the kind that made it clear Christopher had something to say -- but every time Jeff met his gaze he looked away. It was annoying.
“What?” Jeff asked, finally. “What is it?”
“Look, I --” Christopher cleared his throat. “You know, I spent a long time being really busy with hockey and Bethany and the kids and I just kinda realized that I haven’t... made time for you.” He glanced over.
Jeff blinked.
“So if you, you know. If you need to talk about anything, I just wanted to let you know I’m… around,” Christopher continued. “I know it feels like we’re competing a lot, but --”
“It doesn’t,” Jeff said.
Christopher frowned. “What?”
“Feel like we’re competing,” Jeff said. “It doesn’t.” Because Christopher would always win, so what was the point? He hadn’t felt like he was actually competing with Christopher for anything in years.
“You know I promised mom when you moved here that I’d look out for you,” Christopher said, after a minute.
“I know,” said Jeff. He didn’t need it, but it was nice of her.
“So if there’s… anything, or, uh. Anybody? That you wanna… talk about?” Rubbing the back of his neck, Christopher flushed. “Well, I’m here. Okay?”
What? Where was this coming from? “I’m -- I’m okay, Chris,” Jeff said. “But if you have something you wanna say, by all means, spit it out.”
Christopher fidgeted. “You know I don’t… care, right, if you’re gay?”
God, this was about Kent. It had to be. “I’m not
gay
,” Jeff said. Jesus.
“Okay,” said Christopher. “Just. If you were.”
If he were. How was he supposed to know? Jeff assumed that he couldn’t be gay, because it wasn’t like he didn’t
like
girls at all -- it was just that he didn’t think he liked them the way he was
supposed
to like them. Sex was fun, he guessed, in a scratching-an-itch kind of way. But he didn’t want to
marry
a girl, he’d never really envisioned himself with a wife. A house full of kids, sure. But a wife?
The only person he’d ever envisioned in his hypothetical perfect future life was Kent. But did that make him gay?
“I don’t
know
what I am, all right?” Jeff scrubbed hands through his hair. Damnit, mom! Had she called him? “Fuck. Did mom tell you?”
“Mom?” Christopher frowned. “No, dude. I just -- look, we all know that was Kent’s boyfriend, not just his friend, no matter what he said. And I kind of thought -- well, our whole fucking
family
thought you were his boyfriend since forever, so it’s not like it was hard to figure out, okay?”
The whole family? “I --” He coughed. “You thought he was my
boyfriend
?”
“I’ve never seen you like this with anyone,” Christopher said. “Not ever.”
“I --”
“I saw you at family day, all right?” Christopher cut him off. “Don’t pretend you don’t care.”
Jeff swallowed.
It sucked because it was true. Jeff had hated family day. Eric fit right in with everyone so easily, with his bright smile and warm accent. He’d offered to babysit and made everyone’s lives easier and Julianna had asked Christopher how soon Eric would be back. And Kent -- Kent adored him. Jeff already knew that, it wasn’t like he’d never seen them together, it was just…
“If you wanna talk about it, I’m here, okay?” Christopher said. “No bullshit. Because this --” he sighed. “This has to suck, man. It
has
to.”
Jeff glanced away, eyes burning a little. “Yeah,” he said, finally. “I’m -- It --” fuck, he couldn’t even get the words out.
Christopher hugged him.
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
The box let out a tiny mew.
“Oh my God,” said Kent, diving for it, “there’s a
kitty
in there!”
It was the fluffiest kitten Jeff had
ever
seen. Its ears were gigantic and pointed with tufts of fur sticking out. “Who sent you a
cat
in the mail?” he asked.
Kent shrugged, not looking up from the kitten at all. “Who cares?” He cradled it to his chest. “Ohhhhh my God.” The kitten meowed again and Kent laughed. “Fuck, it’s so fucking cute.”
It really was.
Kent
really was. The kitten batted at his finger with one tiny paw.
“I’m naming him Purrs,” he said, nestling his face close to the kitten’s fur.
“Of course you are,” said Jeff, because Kent only named his animals stupid things. Before long every inch of Kent’s social media was going to be covered in cats.
Rustling around in the box, Jeff unearthed a card. “Oh, here you go. Keats sent it -- from Chicago? That Keats?”
“Oh, God bless, he
fucking
would.” Kent laughed. “I hope he gets traded here.”
“He is such a weird dude,” Jeff said. “I can’t believe he’s not a goalie.”
“You and everyone else.”
Kent got off the floor, carrying the kitten to his sofa where he wound them both up in a blanket. “Hey, little buddy,” he said, settling the kitten under the covers. “There you go. Long ride in a box, hey?”
Jeff shook his head and went to let Kevin out, yawning as he opened the door. It had been a long night -- they could’ve played better, but it was what it was. He’d feel better after some sleep.
“Oh my God,” Kent was saying, as Jeff stepped back inside, “I gotta buy kitten food. And stuff.”
“Can’t he eat Kit’s food?” Jeff asked.
“He’s a
baby
,” Kent said. “He needs
baby
food.”
“You’re ridiculous, you know that?” Jeff threw himself down on the sofa.
Honestly, Purrs was pretty cute. Jeff was rubbing under his tiny chin with one finger before he knew it, listening to the soft, itty bitty kitten purr. He was so
fluffy
.
Glancing at the clock, Jeff rubbed his face. He needed to eat something and go to sleep. Standing, he stretched both arms up over his head. “Fuck,” he said, “I’m tired.”
“I know,” Kent said. “Long day.” He was still fussing with Purrs, head tilted down. His laptop was open on the coffee table. “We’ll go to bed soon, huh, buddy?”
The computer made the ringing Skype call noise while Jeff was in the kitchen.
“Hey, you,” Kent said, using the soft voice he always used when he was talking to Eric.
Right. That was Jeff’s cue.
He picked up his plate and walked back out to the living room. “Hi, Eric,” he said, glancing at the laptop screen. Eric was tucked into bed somewhere -- not his room, Jeff knew that. He was familiar with Eric’s room.
It’s not my business
. Jeff cleared his throat.
“Hi, Jeff,” Eric said. “Is your head better?”
His head? Jeff frowned for just a second. Why would --
oh
. He’d had a migraine the other day. “Yeah,” he said, “thanks.”
Kevin took that precise moment to jump up on the sofa next to Kent and lick his face. He bumped at her with one shoulder, laughing. “Kevin, no!”
On screen, Eric laughed.
He needed to go. “C’mon, Kev,” said Jeff. “Leave Kent and his baby alone.” Kent would probably want to show Purrs to Eric and tell him all about how adorable he was. Jeff waved at the camera with one hand as Kevin jumped down from the sofa. “’Night, Eric.”
“Good night, Jeff!” Eric smiled.
Jeff left the living room, making sure Kevin was following. Ducking into his room -- the guest room, whatever -- he set his plate on the bedside table. Sitting down on the bed, Jeff rubbed his face with both hands.
Fuck, this sucked.
Eric was so nice. Honestly. It was irritating. He was trying so hard to be friends with Jeff -- sending him nice messages, being friendly, making sure to notice his presence if he was around. Kent didn’t seem much worse for the wear after that whole meltdown. He kept giving Jeff little sidelong glances if they were together when Eric called, and they’d started including Eric in their TV watching on roadies where they could. It was obvious that Kent wanted them to get along, and if he were honest with himself, Jeff would admit that Eric was funny and he liked having him hanging out in the background when they were just watching TV in a hotel. He never said anything when Kent fell asleep on Jeff and left Jeff to end the call. In fact, he seemed kind of
happy
about it.
Forgiving him for Kent’s showing up on Jeff’s doorstep in his sad hoodie would take some time, though. Jeff hadn’t forgotten about that. And if he took a couple extra steps to take care of Kent in an obvious, visual way, well --
Well, Kent deserved it, and Jeff didn’t really care if Eric liked it or not.
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
“Hey,” Jeff said, as soon as Christopher picked up the phone.“Hey,” said Christopher.“Mom asked me if Kent’s visiting this summer,” Jeff said.There was silence on the other end of the line for a moment. “Uh -- why wouldn’t he?”What. An. Idiot.“Eric,” Jeff said. Seriously, c’mon. Christopher, of all people, should know why already.Christopher paused and Jeff could just see him blinking in his mind’s eye. “Oh,” he said. “I guess I just thought he’d bring him.”Of course he just thought he’d bring him. Christopher probably gave it about two minutes’ worth of thought and that thought was probably I can use him as a babysitter . “That’s what I’m saying,” Jeff said, rubbing the back of his neck with one hand. “I don’t know if he knows he can bring him. His family is like, crazy religious.” He sat on his sofa, reaching out a hand to Kevin as she wormed her way into his lap.“Well --” It sounded like Christopher was chasing his children. “We're not. Didn’t you tell him?” he asked.Like it was that easy.“What,” said Jeff, “I’m just supposed to randomly say hey, Kent, you gonna bring your boyfriend to my place for the summer?”“No -- Oliver -- I told you not to make a volcano in the kitchen, just --” Christopher set his phone down, Jeff could hear the click of it on a surface. Muffled sounds of a child getting in trouble filtered through and Jeff sighed, leaning his head back.Christopher wasn’t going to be any help.“Listen,” Christopher said, once he’d picked the phone up again, “you want me to ask him? Because of your, um. You know?”“Uh,” said Jeff. His neck felt hot. “No. No, that’s not what I meant.” Jesus.Christopher sighed. “Look, man, what do you want me to say? Ask him if he’s coming, say mom asked you. Just see what he says.”“Right.” Jeff rubbed the back of his neck. “Right. I’ll just -- yeah. I’ll do that.”“Yeah,” said Christopher, “okay. If he gets weird just tell him no one cares. I gotta -- are we cool? ‘Cause I gotta go, Oliver’s trying to blow up the kitchen again.”“Sure,” said Jeff, “go stop the apocalypse.”He tossed his phone onto the sofa. So he’d just have to… ask Kent if he was coming, and see what he said. Be casual about it. Some time in the near future, probably, before he made other plans. Groaning, Jeff rubbed his face.Okay.After practice seemed like a decent time. Kent had propped himself up in the corner of his sofa, textbook open on his lap. He was sticking his tongue out just a little, which meant that he was really thinking about whatever it was he was reading.Jeff stepped into Kent’s kitchen to make tea for both of them. He was just going to say he spoke to his mom and that she’d asked after Kent. That was pretty easy, right? And then he could just… see where Kent was with the whole thing. If he’d thought about it.Returning to the living room, he set a cup down on the table before settling onto the sofa. “Hey, Parse?” He wrapped his hands around his mug of tea.“Mm?” Kent didn’t look up from his textbook.“Mom called the other day,” Jeff said. “Asked me if you’re coming for the summer.”“Oh,” Kent said. He looked up. “I, um. I was planning on seeing Eric this summer.”“I didn’t realize the two were mutually exclusive,” Jeff said, keeping his tone light.Kent stared at him.Jeff shrugged one shoulder. “I mean, I don’t see why they should be. You can bring Eric. You know that --” We. I. “-- That they all love you, and mom and dad would love to meet him. They’ll probably fucking love him.”“Oh,” said Kent. “I --” he slid his tongue over his lower lip. “I, um. They would?”Ah, god. Of course Kent hadn’t realized he could bring Eric with him. It probably hadn’t even occurred to him to ask. He would never take Eric to meet his own family, or at least -- if he did, he’d never expect it to be a pleasant experience. Kent and Eric had been together for, what? Two years? Jeff knew that Eric hadn’t met Kent’s mother.Honestly, he wasn’t sure if Eric would want to meet her, all things considered.“Yeah, man,” Jeff said. “C’mon. Did you really think you couldn’t come home any more?” He bumped Kent’s foot with his thigh.Kent tensed his shoulders, chewing on his thumbnail. “I didn’t know if that was, you know. A thing,” he said.“It’s a thing,” Jeff said.“But I usually stay in your room, and -- and you don’t want Eric and me in your room,” Kent said, picking at the eraser on his pencil. “The bed’s too small.”Like that was the only reason. “Yeah,” said Jeff, “that’s a fair point. But you don’t have to stay in my room. You can, like, get an AirBnB or something.” He paused. “But you get the break the news that you’re not staying at home to mom.”“She’ll hate it,” said Kent, shoulders relaxing down.“Just get something close by,” Jeff suggested.Kent grinned a little. “Won’t you miss me?”“Yeah,” Jeff said.Kent tilted his head. “Really?”Shrugging, Jeff sipped from his cup. “Don’t make a big deal out of it,” he said.“Aww,” Kent said, as Kit curled her tail around Jeff’s neck. “That’s so sweet.”“You should call her,” Jeff said.“Yeah,” said Kent, “okay.”
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
“So,” Jeff said, leaning on Kent’s bathroom doorframe, trying to make his posture as nonthreatening as possible. They’d watched an episode of
Man in the High Castle
with Eric earlier, and it was becoming apparent to Jeff that Eric and Jack Zimmermann were definitely more than friends.
Way
more.
Considering how very recently Jeff had opened his door to find Kent on his doorstep and Jack Zimmermann partially responsible… he had questions.
“Yeah?” Kent spat toothpaste into the sink. “What?” He tossed a capful of purple mouthwash into his mouth, swishing it with his usual enthusiasm.
“Just, uh.” Jeff rubbed the back of his neck.
Just do it
. “I --” he took a breath. “I know it’s not my place, okay, and you can, um. You can feel free to tell me to fuck off, okay?”
Kent slanted his gaze toward Jeff for a moment before spitting into the sink again. “O… kay,” he said.
“What happened?” Jeff asked.
God, please don’t let me regret this
. “Between you and Jack?”
“I, um.” Kent busied himself with washing his hands. “Can we -- can we not do this in my bathroom?”
Pushing away from the door frame, Jeff nodded. “Yeah. Sorry. I’ll, uh -- living room?”
Kent pushed past him, heading downstairs. He got a glass of water before curling up in the corner of his sofa. Dragging a blanket onto his lap, he took a long drink from his glass. Purrs clawed his way up into Kent’s lap, making a little nest in the blanket.
Jeff sat on the other end of the sofa. Fuck, he felt like he was going to throw up. Chewing his lower lip, he looked at Kent’s face for a moment. When Kent turned to look at him, Jeff rubbed the back of his neck. “Uh,” he said. “I was just wondering, after seeing him the other day --”
“Just ask me what you really want to know, okay?” Kent set his water glass down with a bit more force than seemed necessary.
“Um, okay.” Jeff rubbed one of his thighs, thinking. “So were you guys, like.” Friends? Boyfriends? Lovers? Fuckbuddies? Surely not fuckbuddies. “I mean -- what were you?”
Kent leaned his head in his hand. "What are you talking about?"
"C'mon, man, I'm not stupid. There were a million rumors and you know it."
Kent leaned back a little. “Oh,” he said.
Aw, fuck. “Look, if you don’t wanna talk about this, I totally get it,” Jeff said, words coming out in a rush. It really wasn’t his business, anyway. He shouldn’t have asked. “I’m sorry, I should --”
Kent interrupted him. “It’s fine,” he said. “Everyone else is thinking it, right? Might as well ask me.” He gnawed at his thumbnail for a minute. “You’re asking if he was my boyfriend,” Kent said, finally. “Aren’t you?”
Jeff’s neck felt hot. “Yeah, I guess,” he said.
“I thought he was,” Kent said.
What did that even
mean
? “Oh,” said Jeff. "Did you ever... discuss it with him?"
“Didn’t really cross my mind.” Looking down at Purrs, so small in his lap, Kent smiled softly. He rubbed his index finger over one of Purrs’s giant ears.
Jeff tried to wrap his mind around what Kent was saying. He
thought
they were boyfriends, but he never thought to ask. That meant they weren’t, didn’t it? Or -- that Kent thought they were and Jack thought they weren’t? He frowned. Kent still received an invitation to Bob’s ceremony, the night he accidentally came out on national television. He’d been close to them. Was it because -- “Did his parents know?” he asked.
Kent’s shoulders tensed. “Y-yeah,” he said, after an intensely awkward pause. “They knew.”
It was not, in Jeff’s opinion, the going thing to discuss random fuckbuddies with one’s parents. If the Zimmermanns knew about Jack and Kent, that meant they were more than just friends with benefits. Didn’t it? “So you…”
“I slept with him, okay?” Kent snapped, cutting him off. “A lot. All right? And I -- I thought that that meant he loved me because I thought that’s what sex meant because I was a stupid
fucking
seventeen year old, okay?” He looked away from Jeff, biting down on a fingernail.
Ah.
“Did he, um.” Goddamnit. Jeff rubbed the back of his neck. “Did he ever, um. Did he ever... force himself on you?”
“F--” Kent jerked back around to stare at Jeff. “
Force himself on me
? No! What the hell?”
Okay, in Jeff’s defense? Kent hadn’t acted happy to see or hear about Zimmermann at basically any time that Jeff could recall, ever. “Well -- look, you hate it when people mention him and you show up on my doorstep like that a few months ago and the
only
variable was Zimmermann, okay, and I --”
“I did everything under my own free will, all right?” Kent snapped. “He never touched me. Like that, I mean.”
“I’m sorry, man,” said Jeff. Shit. “I --”
“Look, I -- I made my own choices. With Jack. Okay? He didn’t
make
me do anything. It was my -- it was me.” Kent took a breath. “I was a stupid kid.”
None of that really explained things though, not the way Jeff wanted. The way Kent looked at Jack in that hospital room, the fact that he never mentioned him, his intense insistence that everything was his fault -- those weren’t just leftover feelings from a harmless teenage fling. Jeff had had a million harmless teenage flings. He knew what those looked like, and that wasn’t it. It didn’t add up.
“Did he hurt you?” he asked, finally.
“What?” Kent looked up just as Purrs bit him in the thumb. “Like -- what d’you mean?” He swatted lightly at Purrs, waving him off.
“When you were in juniors,” Jeff said. “Did he hurt you?”
“No,” Kent said, picking at the blanket. He was looking
anywhere
except in Jeff’s direction.
Jeff tilted his head. “Parse. What do you think I’m asking you, right now?”
Kent swallowed, not looking up from his hands. “It sounds like you’re asking me if Jack hit me, or something,” he said, after a moment. “The answer is no.
No
. He wouldn’t -- he would never do that.”
“Okay,” said Jeff. That was good. “But emotionally, did he hurt you?”
“That’s --” Purrs crept into Kent’s lap again. “I’m not a child, Jeffrey. He didn’t have to walk on eggshells because he was constantly worried about hurting my feelings or… whatever.”
Kent only really called him
Jeffrey
when he was mad. "I didn't say that,” Jeff said. “I'm asking if he ever made you feel like shit when you didn't deserve it.”
Kent sat quietly for a minute, rubbing trembling fingers over Purrs’s fur. “No,” he said. “Not when I didn’t deserve it.”
Okay. This wasn’t working. He was going to have to try something else. Maybe -- “What was Jack like?” Jeff asked.
“Oh, um.” Kent took a breath, leaned back against the sofa. “He was a perfectionist,” he said. “So good at hockey, really passionate. And he was, y’know. Moody. Seventeen. But he helped me a lot, you know, figure out things I needed to work on, stuff like that. Hockey.” He paused, running his tongue over his lower lip. “He didn’t really like to talk about his feelings but he was so sweet, sometimes. He would --” he broke off for a moment. “He listened to me, you know, when Mom met Dan. He made me feel better.”
“Sure,” said Jeff. “Then why aren’t you guys friends any more?”
“I --” Kent stared for a moment before shutting his mouth with an audible
click
of teeth. He swallowed. “I wasn’t good to him, Jeff,” he said. “I didn’t know what to do. I didn’t know how to do anything.”
Jeff frowned. “What do you mean?”
Kent shrugged. He scratched under Purrs’s chin, focusing on the cat instead of Jeff’s question.
All right. Kent said Jack was a perfectionist, that he
helped
him figure out things he needed to work on. He was moody. He didn’t like talking about his emotions. Thinking, Jeff chewed his lower lip. What did he need to ask?
“Did he make you feel like it was your fault when you guys lost a game?” Jeff asked. Kent was always saying that, and he took losses so personally. That had to come from somewhere, right? Kent said Jack never made him feel like shit
when he didn’t deserve it
, which wasn’t the same thing as saying no.
“It
was
my fault,” Kent said, looking up. “We’ve talked about this. I was a shitty player, I had to get better.”
Bingo. “But did Jack
say
that to you?”
“Well -- yeah,” Kent said, unwinding under the blanket just a little. “I mean, he was just being
honest
with me. And he’d tell me when I did things right, too, it wasn’t just… it wasn’t just criticism.”
Sure, okay. Jeff rolled his shoulders back, fighting the building knot between them. “What else was your fault?”
One of Kent’s shoulders lifted in the barest of shrugs. “I just made things harder for him. That’s the truth, okay? I made him so anxious and I disagreed with his dad and I should’ve --” he shook his head. “I just, you know. We drank too much and did stupid stuff and I didn’t, um. I didn’t respect boundaries and I pushed him too hard. He didn’t need that, not from me, and I -- I thought I was helping,” Kent said. “I mean, I was trying to help. But he didn’t need me fucking micromanaging his life and if I hadn’t been so
fucking
…” he shook his head again, clearly searching for words. “He wouldn’t’ve --”
He didn’t have to finish that train of thought for Jeff to know what it meant. Kent meant that Jack wouldn’t have overdosed if it weren’t for him. He meant that he felt responsible for what sounded, in Jeff’s opinion, like a suicide attempt.
“Did you love him?” Jeff asked.
“Yes,” Kent said, as if he were saying the sky was blue. It was fact to him, simple. “And he hates me for it.”
Jeff’s stomach twisted. God, to feel like you killed the person you loved -- what must that be like? Had Kent ever talked to anyone about it? Did he talk to Brian?
Jeff thought about the bathroom door, about how Kent never wanted it closed. He had so many nightmares, but never wanted to discuss the substance of his dreams. “Is this what you dream about?” Jeff asked, and his voice was so soft that he barely heard it himself. “Jack?”
Kent nodded without looking Jeff in the face. “He was in the hotel bathroom,” he said. “I just wanted him to help me pick a tie.”
He wanted him to -- fuck. Jeff took a breath. “You -- did you find him?” he asked.
Kent nodded again.
“Shit, Parse. Why didn’t you ever say anything?” Jeff asked, finally. Kent came to them almost immediately after the draft. Jack’s overdose was -- fuck, how long had it even
been
? Hardly any time at all had passed. And Kent never said anything.
Nothing.
“Because it doesn’t matter,” Kent said, voice soft. “Talking about it doesn’t change any of it.”
“Jack’s overdose wasn’t your --”
“Wasn’t my fault, yeah,” Kent said, uninterested in listening to whatever else Jeff had to say, “that’s what everyone says.”
Right. Jeff swallowed. “I’m sorry,” he said.
“Me too,” said Kent.
Looking down at his hands, Jeff cleared his throat. “And does Eric know?”
“Does Eric know what?” Kent shifted on the sofa and Purrs scooted under the blanket, exploring.
“Just -- all of it,” Jeff said, “I guess.”
“Mostly,” Kent said. “Yeah.”
“Do you miss him?” Jeff asked.
Kent looked back up at him. “Not like I used to,” he said. “Depends on the day.”
Jeff paused. “Do I, um.” He swallowed. “Do I remind you of him at all?”
Is that why you can’t ever love me?
Kent tilted his head, looking at Jeff’s face for a long moment. “No,” he said. “Or --” he frowned. “If you do, it’s --” Stopping, Kent ran his hands through his hair, thinking.
Jeff waited.
“You’re nothing like him,” Kent said, finally. “Except your cellies.”
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
Jeff was just turning over in bed to shut the light off when he heard a light knock at the bedroom door. He frowned. Why was Kent knocking ? It was his house. “Come in?”The door creaked open and Kent peeked around the side, Purrs on his shoulder. He was wearing that North Stars hoodie. “Are you sleeping?” he asked, voice soft.“Obviously not,” Jeff said, sitting up a little further. He frowned. “What’s up?”Kent chewed his lower lip. “Do you mind, um. Sitting with me for a little while?”Sitting with him? What did that entail, exactly? “What," said Jeff, “like, on the couch?” He was already mostly naked and tucked in to bed. He’d get out if he had to, but he’d rather not.“Wherever,” Kent said.Ah. Jeff scooted over in the bed, making room. “C’mon then,” he said.Kent shuffled in. He sat on the edge of the bed, hesitating for a minute. It looked like he’d been chewing his lower lip for a while.“What’s the matter, bud?” Jeff asked. Was it Eric? He was staying with Jack and, even though Kent said he was fine with it, Jeff was sure he had to be feeling… some kind of way about it.Kent shrugged the shoulder that didn’t contain a cat. “I don’t know. I just --” he wiggled under the covers, edging closer to Jeff. “I’m just --” he sighed.All right. He needed a minute. Jeff slid an arm around Kent, pulling him a bit closer. It took a moment for Kent to relax against him, but once he did Purrs wiggled his way down to stretch across their laps.“I was talking to Eric,” Kent said.“Yeah?” Jeff edged just a little closer. “And?”“He told me to see if you minded sitting with me for a while?”Jeff frowned again. Why? “Okay,” he said. “I don’t mind. You know that. I’ll sit with you as long as you want.”Nodding, Kent picked at the edge of the sheet, not looking up.“You wanna tell me why, though?” Jeff asked, keeping his voice soft.Kent was quiet. They sat in silence, Kent idly petting Purrs and Jeff just… waiting. Kent scratched under Purrs chin. “I guess I’m nervous,” he said, finally.“Okay,” said Jeff, again. “About what?”“Finals,” Kent admitted. “I mean -- making it to finals. Whatever.”Jeff nodded. “I get that,” he said. “It’s kind of a big deal.” He rubbed at Kent’s shoulder with his thumb. “But, y’know. We’ll just have to do our best, right?”“I don’t want to let you guys down,” Kent said. “If we don’t make it, I just -- it’ll just -- and after last year, fuck.”He didn’t need to finish that thought. Kent thought if they lost everyone would blame him, because he would blame himself. Jeff didn’t need him to say that to know what he meant. It wasn’t even a lie to say that some people would, no doubt, blame Kent for the loss just because he was gay, like who he fucked had anything to do with his game.No. Unacceptable. “We’re gonna win or lose as a team.” Jeff bent his head. “Hey. Look at me.”Kent’s eyes flicked up behind his glasses.“You’re a great hockey player,” Jeff said. “And no offense, but -- so are plenty of other guys on this team. I mean, De los Santos is amazing.”Kent let out a small huff of air, the faint ghost of a laugh.“I’m serious.” Jeff hugged Kent a bit tighter. “We’ll all work together or whatever. Like Julianna’s ponies.”There a pause before a soft gasp of disbelief. “Did you seriously just compare us to My Little Pony ?” Kent asked. He curled in closer to Jeff’s side, leaning his head on Jeff’s bare shoulder. “Oh, I’m fucking telling everyone you said that.”“If you were a pony, you’d have cat paw prints on your butt,” Jeff said. He grinned. “And if we win, you’re getting that tattooed.”Kent laughed for real that time, bright and loud. “Right,” he said. “I’m getting cat prints tattooed on my ass if we win.”“I’m gonna hold you to this,” Jeff said. “I’m not fucking around.”“Fine,” said Kent, “but if I have to get cat prints, you have to get…” he pursed his lips, thinking.“I’ll get dog ones,” said Jeff. He nudged Kevin with his foot.“Oh, right,” Kent said. “Because of Kevin.” She lifted her head and wagged her tail. “Or you could get like, crossed hockey sticks.”“That’s so fucking stupid, man.” Jeff laughed. “Dog prints would at least be reasonable.”“Oh my god,” Kent said, “we’ll have matching tattoos.”He was back to assuming they’d win. Jeff laughed again, louder. “Yeah. Hot.”They sat in silence for a moment before Jeff turned his head, looking at Kent. “Hey,” he said.“Hey,” said Kent.“You feel better?”Turning to look at him, Kent gave him a small smile. “A little, yeah.”“All right.” Jeff wiggled a little, scooting further under the covers. His shoulders were getting cold.“Can I --” Kent stopped, swallowed. “Sorry, can I stay, just for a while?”“Stay all night if you want,” said Jeff. “I don’t give a shit.” He switched the television back on, settling on an episode of Golden Girls . He was sick of it, but Kent wasn’t.He never was.They tucked down into the bed, nesting under the covers to get comfortable. Kent was a warm, heavy weight against Jeff’s chest, not quite close enough to be the little spoon. By the time the third episode started, Jeff noticed that Kent wasn’t singing along to the theme song. He twisted just a little, craning his neck to see.Kent’s eyes were closed, lashes dark gold against the skin. He was asleep, Purrs tucked up under his chin into a tiny, tight grey ball. Jeff smiled softly. He pulled away just enough to shut off the television and his lamp before scooting in closer. Kent’s breathing was slow and deep -- he must’ve fallen asleep pretty early. Jeff pressed his forehead to the back of Kent’s neck for a moment, closing his eyes.He smelled like bright, fresh laundry detergent and the faint mint of toothpaste. Jeff slid his arm around Kent’s waist after a bit of hesitation, tucking in close. The fabric of the worn old hoodie was soft under his arm, warm from Kent’s skin. He took a breath. “Good night,” Jeff whispered, speaking Stoney. “I -- I love you.”Kent and Purrs both slept on undisturbed.
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
Everyone was on edge -- and why wouldn’t they be? It was the last game of the series. It was win or go home. Jeff felt jittery just thinking about it, even though they’d won the Cup last year. Sitting down on the bench, he rubbed at his hair with one hand.
It was getting long. Eric had teased him about it on the way home from the airport. Looking down, Jeff quickly undid the buttons of his shirt. He’d feel better once he was dressed. He could listen to some music, do his stretches, take some breaths...
Jeff wasn’t the only nervous one in the room. Several guys dealt with their nerves through humor. It was a common enough coping mechanism. And usually it was just kind of… a bit off-color, nothing awful. But today was obviously different.
“Right, well, y’know. He could have any girl he wanted, I guess it’s not a surprise he went out and found one,” said Juice.
Jeff frowned.
“Right?” Scooby laughed.
Next to Jeff, Kent turned to look back at them, eyes narrowed. He’d only just set his bag down. “
What
did you just say?”
“Nothing, man,” Juice said. “Chill.”
Kent shook his head. “Unbelievable,” he muttered, already working on his shirt buttons. Before long he was half-dressed, pads on, earbuds in. Jeff could hear the faint sound of Destiny’s Child as Kent leaned over, tugging one sock on.
Like always, Christopher had his stick tape sitting on the bench -- Kent always used Christopher’s tape, had been doing it since he got his first hat trick with Vegas after borrowing it once. When he went to grab it, Carly put his stick out, angling it for his ankles. Kent tripped, catching himself with one hand on the bench and one knee on the floor. “What the
fuck
?” he snapped.
“Oh, sorry,” Carly said, pulling the stick back, “I just thought you liked it on your knees.” He said it with the friendly, joking tone of a buddy -- but they all knew Carl and Kent weren’t close.
What. The. Fuck.
Jeff pushed up from the bench. “Are you
fucking
serious right now?”
Kent pushed himself back upright, grabbed for Christopher’s tape. “Leave it,” he said. “Jeff. Leave it.”
“That’s enough, Carlson,” Christopher said. Glancing at Jeff, he added a “you, too” before looking around the dressing room. “All of you need to get your heads in this game,” he said. “Right the fuck now. Got it?”
He was just trying to keep the peace, probably, and Jeff knew that -- but he hated it all the same. He sat back down, glaring.
Him, too
? Like standing up for someone was equal to being a complete
dick
? Jeff put his headphones on. He didn’t need this.
None of them needed this. Fuck. They had a game to focus on.
A chorus of “yeah” and “right on” and various other affirmatives filled the room as Jeff cranked the volume on
Eye of the Tiger
. Whatever.
They were going to win.
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
Blind or not, it was a beautiful pass, smooth and clean, because Kent knew Jeff would be there. It wasn’t a play they practiced, but Jeff just
knew
Kent would pass and when he did, Jeff caught the puck and shot it in what felt like slow motion. As it hit the net everything seemed to come back into focus and then he was heading for Kent without thinking, arms already opening wide.
He slammed Kent into the boards, both of them screaming. They
did it
. They won. Kent tossed his helmet to the side to get the face cage out of the way and plant a kiss on Jeff’s cheek, and Jeff’s heart stuttered in his chest.
Black and maroon confetti exploded over the ice as more of their teammates joined them, everyone grabbing Jeff to hug him or pat his head. Helmets and gloves hit the ice from all directions as they became one giant pile. Jeff’s mouth hurt from smiling already.
God. He’d scored the gamewinner. It was so surreal. Saints wrapped him in a crushing hug, letting out a whoop of joy. “Fuck
yeah
, man! Fuck yeah!”
There were people all over the ice. Coach Scott appeared at Jeff’s elbow, hugged him and Kent at the same time. Everywhere Jeff looked, people were beaming.
“Kent!” Eric shoved his way through the crowd of people on the ice.
Kent turned, caught Eric in his arms, spun them in a little circle before pulling him into a tight hug and burying his face in Eric’s shoulder. Jeff glanced away because it didn’t seem right to stare, skated over to hug Whiskey and ruffle his hair. When he turned around again, Eric was still hugging Kent, and then he pulled back and Kent stared down at him with an intense, quiet look on his face.
And then he kissed him, right at center ice, right on top of the rainbow ace of spades. Eric’s blond hair caught the light, and when they broke apart for Kent to murmur something, the smile on Eric’s face was radiant.
Jeff had seen Eric and Kent kiss before -- of course he had. It just never felt quite like that, never dropped his stomach, made him a bit sick. He swallowed as someone clapped a hand to his shoulder, congratulating him again.
He should be happy. He
was
happy. Of course he was.
A moment later, Christopher wrapped him in a tight hug. “You got the gamewinner,” he said, sounding a little choked up. “I’m so proud of you, bud.”
Jeff gripped at Christopher’s arm, closed his eyes. “We did it,” he said. Even though they’d won last year, it felt different. More special.
Catching sight of Kent and Eric again, Jeff swallowed.
It kind of felt worse.
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
Fuck. Kent and Eric were dancing again.
Kent and Eric were dancing again and Kent was
very
drunk, probably more drunk than Jeff could remember him ever being, maybe, and he looked so
happy
. He and Eric held each other close, hands everywhere, and why not? They looked so good together, both of them.
To be fair? It was a Stanley Cup win in
Vegas
, no one could expect a mundane level of partying. Jeff barely remembered the night of their first Cup win, and the only reason he so vividly remembered the last one was he’d been so worried about Kent’s concussion that he hadn’t really allowed himself to drink that much. This time, though? Super-charged partying only, with Kent uninjured and their win still fresh. They ended up at a gay bar, a bunch of them, because Tremblay was dead-set on being inclusive, even if they were all still laughing and drinking and crazy. It was a miracle Jeff hadn’t passed out yet. His blood sugar was probably insane.
God, he was getting old.
“Jeffrey!” Kent’s eyes were bright as he flung arms around Jeff’s waist, pulling at him. When did he leave the dance floor? “C’mon. Dance with us. Please?”
Oh, hell no. “I can’t dance like that,” Jeff protested, because he couldn't. He was not on Eric’s level, like, at all.
“Yes you can!” Eric grabbed his hand. Both their cheeks were pink, smiles warm, and it was too hard to refuse Kent when he looked like that, happy and soft. Jeff would’ve given him anything that night, and he could not find it in him to feel bad about it. He let out a soft breath and allowed them drag him out onto the dance floor, where plenty of other drunk hockey players were already letting loose.
Nobody would notice his bad dancing, right? Surely not.
“Nobody will notice your shitty dancing,” Kent said, like he could read Jeff’s mind, his hand sliding around Jeff’s waist as he moved behind him. “Don’t worry.”
Hah. “I’m not worried,” Jeff said.
“Liar.” Kent let out a cheer when the song flipped over -- Eric did, too. Before Jeff really knew what was happening they were basically just sort of dancing on him, and all he had to do was… stay in between them.
It was nice.
It was late when they got back to the house, Eric and Kent and Jeff and Saints and a bunch of other guys, continuing the party well after what anyone could call a respectable hour.
When Kent and Eric finally went to bed, Eric first, Kent paused to say goodnight to Jeff, hugging him at the bottom of the stairs.
“Get some rest,” Jeff said. “We have a presser in the morning.”
Kent smiled up at him. “Thanks,” he said, winding his arms around Jeff’s waist. They stayed like that for a minute, arms around each other, before Jeff squeezed Kent just a bit tighter and let go.
“Go to bed,” he said.
“Are you staying?” Kent asked.
Jeff laughed. “What, here? Yeah, man. Where else would I go?” He’d had way too much to drink to even consider going back to his apartment, and Kevin was already at Kent’s house, anyway.
“I don’t know,” Kent said. “I don’t know.” He grabbed for Jeff’s hand again. “We did it.”
“Yeah we did, bud,” said Jeff, rubbing his thumb over the back of Kent’s hand. “G’night, huh?”
“Night.” Kent let go, went up the stairs, detoured to brush his teeth even in his inebriated state.
Nerd.
Jeff rubbed his face and headed for his room, stopping to check his sugar and brush his teeth and splash water on his face before falling into bed, curling up with his dog. He was not going to think about Kent and Eric upstairs or about dancing between them all night, and he was
definitely
not going to think about how he was going to bed alone the night they won the Stanley fucking Cup. His younger self would be shocked.
He bet his sister wouldn’t.
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
“Kent’s not
staying
?” Dagny stared at him in apparent horror. “W-- why not?”
“Because there’s not enough room,” said Jeff.
Dagny gave the sort of contemptuous look one could only receive from a teenager. “He
always
stays here,” she said. “With you.”
“Yes, well.” Jeff looked down at the laundry, grabbed a shirt to fold so he had an excuse not to look at her. “He brought his boyfriend, this time, so.”
It was silent for so long that Jeff thought Dagny might’ve left. When he looked up, she was standing there, just looking at him.
“What?” Jeff’s shoulders tensed.
“But I thought he was
your
boyfriend,” Dagny said, voice soft.
Jeff shrugged one shoulder.
After another minute, Dagny flopped down onto Jeff’s bed. “Well, who
is
he, then?” she asked.
“Who?” Jeff grabbed another shirt to fold.
“Kent’s boyfriend,” Dagny snapped.
“His name’s Eric,” Jeff said. “He’s really nice. You’ll like him.” He glanced up at her. “He likes cooking.”
“Does he play hockey?”
“Yes.” Jeff set the folded shirt down and picked up a bunch of socks.
“Is he tall?” Dagny asked.
“What?” Jeff laughed. “No. What’s that got to do with anything?”
Dagny shrugged and looked out Jeff’s window for a minute, twisting a piece of her hair around a finger. Jeff rolled his socks into pairs, setting them in a pile. Once he’d gotten through the whole laundry basket, he stuffed things into his dresser. When he turned back around, Dagny was still there.
Jeff sat on the bed next to her, slinging an arm around her shoulders. “Hey,” he said. “What’s the matter?”
Dagny shook her head. “Nothing,” she said.
“Oh, okay,” said Jeff.
“I just --” Dagny leaned her head on Jeff’s shoulder. “I thought you guys were gonna be together forever.”
What? “We’ve never
been
together.” Jeff sighed. “Dagny. Kent and I were never dating.”
Dagny shoved away from him suddenly. “Oh my
god
,” she said. “
Jeffrey.
You didn’t
tell him
?”
Jeff’s neck heated. What’d she have to say it like that for? “I don’t know what you’re talking about.”
She rolled her eyes. “Uh, the fact that you’re madly in love with Kent and you want to raise his babies?”
“I never said that!”
“I should not be better at this than you are,” Dagny said.
“W --”
“You’re a grown man,” she continued.
“I --”
“I’m still in
high school
and I confess my crushes better than you.”
It wasn’t the same! “This is different!” Jeff snapped.
“Yeah, ‘cause I don’t want to marry mine,” Dagny said.
Damn, she was irritating. “I forgot how annoying you are,” Jeff sighed. “Go away.”
“You should’ve kissed him on national TV,” Dagny said, standing up.
“I hate you,” Jeff said.
“Hate you more.” Dagny paused in Jeff’s doorway. “Is he bringing Eric here?”
“Of course he is,” Jeff said, because why wouldn’t Kent bring Eric over? Their mom wanted to meet him, and Eric was going to be part of Kent’s life for a long time.
“You want me to hate him?” she asked, a minute later.
For a moment, Jeff wanted to say yes. Smiling at her, Jeff shook his head. “Thanks, champ,” he said. “But I’m good.”
“Martyr,” Dagny said.
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
“You can
adopt
them,” Kent said, hands full of fluffy orange tabby and face bright with a smile.
“I know! Aren’t they sweet?” Eric took a picture of Kent staring down at the cat. It was his idea to come to Regal Cat Cafe -- he’d found the place on Google, apparently. Jeff hadn’t know there
was
a cat cafe in Calgary.
It was a bit irritating that he hadn’t thought of it first.
The cafe was adorable. Clean and bright, it had the sort of geometric design to it that Kent liked, and the floor was a fun turquoise color. They had little cakes shaped like cats and funny kitty drink names, like the tea called “Tortoiseshell” that Jeff was currently enjoying. Kent’s hot chocolate came with a cat print in the foam, and they’d all been delighted to hear that the place partnered with a no-kill animal shelter.
“We have to give them a donation,” Kent said, and Eric laughed.
“I’m sure they’ll love that, sweetheart,” he said.
Jeff was sure they would, too. He’d already caught people putting both of them -- all three of them, really -- on Instagram.
Once they were in with the cats, though, he forgot about how many people were probably
still
putting them on social media. Kent was so
happy
. Every time a cat did something cute, he’d look for Eric and Jeff, wanting both of them to see the adorable happening -- which meant that he was constantly pointing out different cats.
“I’m so glad we came,” Kent said, as a tabby settled into his lap. “Thanks for finding this place. I can’t believe I didn’t know about it before.”
Eric laughed. “Yes, well. I am very good at using the internet, honey,” he said.
“Yes,” said Kent, “very good with The Google.”
Eric laughed again, startling the cat in Kent’s lap.
They spent the rest of that day just wandering around Calgary, talking and poking into stores and restaurants. Eric, it turned out, was more charming and funny than Jeff had realized. He was also very attentive, and he seemed to have figured out some magical way to get Kent to talk about how he was feeling without acting like it was a personal violation. He recognized that Kent wanted to go home before Kent said anything, and his jokes always made Kent laugh.
They pulled up to the condo but Jeff didn’t cut the engine.
Kent poked at the seatbelt to unbuckle it before looking up. “Aren’t you coming in?”
“Nah, it’s late, I should go home.” Jeff smiled.
“Are you sure?” Eric leaned forward. “We could watch so many episodes of
The Golden Girls
!”
Laughing, Jeff reached out to ruffle Eric’s hair. “Thanks, but I really gotta go. Kevin’s waiting for me.”
“Ugh --” Eric ran a hand over the longer part of his hair, trying to settle it again. “Well, fine. But I’m making peanut butter cookies tomorrow.”
“Is that a threat?”
“A promise,” Kent said, opening the passenger side door. “So bring Kevin over when you come.”
“Yeah, yeah.” Jeff waved as they exited the car. Kent laced their fingers together immediately as Eric pulled in close. The sunset stained their hair red. “See you tomorrow.”
“Bye,” said Eric. “Drive safe.”
“Bye,” Kent said. They waited for him to back out of the driveway before heading inside.
Jeff stopped in the kitchen when he got home, pouring a glass of water and checking his sugar before heading upstairs, moving slowly. On the way he clicked off the light his mom left on for him, pausing at the top of the stairs to check that nothing was in the hall before he shut it off.
Fuck, he was tired. Shaking his head, Jeff flipped the light switch and walked straight down the hallway, headed for the last door on the right. They’d had a good day. The cats were cute and they’d had great food and Kent had finally stopped walking with that tension in his shoulders that always built up at the end of a season. And Eric had promised to make peanut butter cookies. So why did he feel so --
There was a light on in his room. As he pushed the door open he could hear a Tori Amos song playing quietly on the stereo.
Excuse me, can I be you for a while
....
Dagny was laying in his bed with Kevin sprawled out next to her.
Jeff paused. “Hey, champ,” he said, after a minute. “Everything okay?”
Startling a little, Dagny sat up immediately. Jeff did not recognize the name of the band on her black t-shirt. “I, uh -- what are you doing here?” She hadn’t taken off her eyeliner.
“It’s my room,” Jeff reminded her, stepping in and nudging the door shut. “I recall you having one at the other end of the hall.”
“Well, yeah,” said Dagny, “I just thought, um. I thought you weren’t coming home tonight.”
Jeff set his water glass on the bedside table. “It’s still my room,” he said. Turning to look at the stereo, he grinned. “Are you getting soft in your old age, listening to --” he made air quotes “-- vintage tunes?”
Dagny rolled her eyes and flopped back down.
Jeff flopped down next to her. They laid quietly as the song continued, almost over.
Hey, but I don't care 'cause sometimes, I said sometimes I hear my voice
I hear my voice, I hear my voice, and it's been here
Silent all these years
Jeff’s eyes hurt. Fuck. He closed them, because nothing could be worse than crying over nothing in front of his baby sister.
“You have a good day?” Dagny asked, after a moment.
Jeff swallowed against the burning in his throat. “Yeah,” he said, because it was, damnit, but his voice came out wrong.
The CD switched over to the next track and Dagny sighed. “Yeah,” she said. “Me, too.”
Scrubbing at his eyes with the heel of his hand, Jeff swallowed. “Yeah?” He pushed up onto one elbow. “Hey. You okay?”
“How did you know you liked boys?” she asked, after a long stretch of quiet.
Oh. “Uh,” said Jeff. “I don’t -- I don’t like boys.” That was not strictly true, but --
Dagny gave him an incredulous look. “You don’t like boys,” she repeated.
Jeff sighed. “I like lots of people,” he said.
“No, you
fuck
lots of people.”
Holy shit. “
Dagny
!”
“What?” she finally looked at him. “You do, right? Boys, too?”
“Not any
more
,” Jeff hissed. Jesus.
“Right,” she said. “Because you’re in love with Kent.”
“Whatever,” Jeff said.
“But you are.” Dagny looked back up at the ceiling. “Did you ever love anybody else?”
Jeff looked down at the blankets. “No,” he admitted, “but that’s not a prerequisite for --” wait. That wasn’t what he was supposed to be telling her. “Uh, not that you shouldn’t be safe, but --” god, it was getting embarrassing. His ears burned. “I just didn’t, um. It never happened before.”
“There’s a word for that, you know,” she said. “Demi--”
“I don’t care,” said Jeff, both because it had nothing to do with her original question and because he didn’t.
“‘Course you don’t,” said Dagny. She paused. “Amelia thinks she’s in love with you.”
He laughed. Right, of course. His sister’s sixteen year old best friend thought she was in love with him. “Where is this going, buddy? I’m tired.”
“She just talks about you a lot,” Dagny said, and something in her tone of voice made Jeff frown.
She talked about Amelia all the time. They did
everything
together. In fact -- oh. “It’s just hockey,” he said, tone gentle.
“I wish she liked me like that,” Dagny whispered, and Jeff’s heart hurt for her.
He thought about it for a minute before clearing his throat. “Maybe you should just play hockey,” he suggested.
Dagny finally laughed and punched his shoulder. “Fuck off,” she said. And then, a minute later, “don’t tell mom.”
“Oh, I’m totally telling mom,” Jeff said. “She’ll love hearing you’ve finally decided you like hockey.”
“You’re such a dick,” Dagny said. “I love you.”
Jeff laid his head back down onto his pillow. “I love you too, champ,” he said.
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
His phone was ringing. Jeff let out a soft curse, grabbing for the phone while trying not to burn himself on the water he’d just boiled. He was just making some coffee, getting ready to go out on a run. Kent was upstairs still, getting dressed.“Hello?”“Hi,” said Eric. “Um. Can we talk?”Jeff frowned. “Uh –” He set the french press down. “Yeah? What’s this about?”“I know that you have… feelings for Kent,” Eric said. “That you probably have for a while.”Holy -- Jeff coughed. Jesus. Talk about going for the gut -- what could he even say to that? “Look, Eric, I --”“It’s fine,” Eric said, interrupting him. “I’m not upset. I just think we should, um. We should talk about this? Because it’s been going on for a while.” Wait just a goddamn second. “Nothing is going on ,” Jeff snapped. Fuck, what was he implying? That Jeff would -- what, would help Kent cheat on him?That Kent would ever cheat on anyone ? “I didn’t mean like that,” Eric said, snapping right back at Jeff. He took a breath. “Just – okay. Okay. This is coming out wrong.”Jeff frowned again. This was not the best conversation to be having first thing in the morning, not when Kent could be downstairs any minute.“What do you think,” Eric said softly, “about, um. About dating somebody who has a boyfriend?”Oh. What? “Uh --” Jeff blinked. “I mean, I -- I never thought about it at all before.” Honestly, he’d only ever thought about dating one person.Ever.“It’s fine,” Eric said, interrupting him. “I’m not upset. I thought, um. I thought we had fun this summer, all of us. You know.”Actually, yeah. Jeff did know. They’d had a lot of fun, and it had felt… nice, at the condo with Kent and Eric. Cozy, even. They’d had a great time at Stampede, and Jeff liked Eric. Really. He made Kent happy.“And I know things were weird between you and me after, um. After all that mess months ago,” Eric was saying, “and I know we don’t really know each other that well, but I’d – I’d like to get to know you better. If you want.”“Oh,” said Jeff. His head felt fuzzy. “You mean --” What did he mean, exactly? He pushed the plunger to press the grounds down inside the coffee.“You’re good to him,” Eric said, then. “All the time. And I love that you are, and Lord knows he needs it.”Jeff took a deep breath. You’re good to him. What was Eric saying? Was this -- “But what about you?” Jeff asked. This didn’t make sense. Eric loved Kent. He’d just met Kent’s mother . That was -- no. God, Jeff was going to kill him. “You’re not -- you’re not breaking up with him, are you? Because that’s a horrible idea. If something’s happened I’m sure you guys can work through it, you’re perf--”“We’re not breaking up,” Eric said. He was laughing. Why was he laughing? “Mercy, no. No. I’m only asking if you would maybe want to be Kent’s boyfriend too, that’s all.”Too? Like, as in two ? What was he saying? That Jeff could -- be with Kent? For real. Not just as his best friend, but…Jeff swallowed. “I --”“You don’t have to date me, too,” Eric said, quickly, as if that’s what Jeff had thought he meant. “I’m not saying anything like that. It’s just that I think you love him and I think he loves you, too, and I don’t see why we can’t -- why it has to be you or me. When it could be you and me.”Eric and Jeff. His chest hurt from the possibility.“I --” Was that something he could do? More importantly… had Eric talked to Kent about this at all ? Jeff remembered that awful threesome that wasn’t, remembered the way Eric said he’d thought it was fine and Kent had obviously never been fine with it. “Look, I don’t know, um. I don’t know anything about, like.” Whatever you’d call that kind of relationship . “Like how that would work, but it seems -- really complicated and like, I don’t know, like we’d get jealous or something, and I don’t want to make his life harder, so --”“We could make it work,” Eric said. “Just, will you think about it? Please?”Jeff jerked when he heard a noise upstairs. Fuck. Kent was coming down. “I’ll think about it,” Jeff said. “Yeah. Okay?”“Okay,” said Eric. “Thanks. I know this was, um. This was a weird phone call.”“No shit,” said Jeff. He glanced at the stairs, smiled at Kent’s fuzzy hair. “Hey, man. I’ll talk to you later, okay?”“Sure,” said Eric. “Have a good morning.”“You, too,” Jeff said. He hung up, setting his phone to the side just as Kent entered the kitchen.“That’s an early call,” Kent said, grabbing a mug. “Everything okay?”“Oh, yeah,” said Jeff. “Everything’s fine, man.” He pushed the french press toward Kent. “C’mon. We gotta get going.”Kent poured coffee into his mug. “Yeah, yeah. I’ll chug it, whatever.”Jeff smiled.
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
Jeff didn’t know what to do.
Eric had called over a week ago, asking him think about talking to Kent about -- about what, being in love with him for years? And while Jeff had absorbed that conversation, he was pretty sure, he still hadn’t managed to say… anything. At all.
It was just -- it was hard. What if Eric was wrong? What if Jeff said something to Kent and it ruined
everything
? Listening to Kent singing in the shower, waiting his turn, Jeff didn’t think he could bear that. Their season hadn’t even started yet, they weren’t even home in Vegas. For fuck’s sake, they were sharing a bed in his parents’ house.
And he didn’t want to think about not coming home with Kent after practices, about not cooking dinner together and giving up falling asleep next to him, watching movies. He liked his room in Kent’s house. He liked the way Kent came to find him, now, when he had nightmares upstairs. Kent was Jeff’s best friend.
He’d never really managed to daydream himself through scenarios where he confessed and Kent accepted him. Somehow, all of Jeff’s daydreams skipped right past the beginning and started with them adopting kids, or moving back home to Canada, or just plain being together and happy. The details of how they got there weren’t that important, not really. At least, they never had been, before.
Jeff had never really thought Kent would want him. Not really. Not the way he wanted Eric, where he softened all over when he looked at him and got that shy, sweet smile on his face when their hands touched.
But Eric wouldn’t have called him to have that conversation if there weren’t
something
there. Would he? Fuck, Jeff didn’t know. He rubbed his face. It made his head hurt, thinking about it. Taking a breath, he banged on the bathroom door.
“
C’mon
, man!” he yelled. “Don’t use all the hot water!”
“I’m almost
done
, damn!” The water shut off, and Jeff sighed. A moment later, the lock on the bathroom door flipped, and he pushed it open.
“Go ahead,” Kent said, towel wrapped around his waist, hair dripping.
Jeff’s throat felt dry. “Thanks,” he said. “Jerk.”
Kent stuck his tongue out at him, like they were five, and that warmth bloomed in Jeff’s chest. Fuck. He took a breath and stepped past Kent, yanking his shirt off over his head.
Yeah. It could wait.
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
Kent let his head rest against the seat, sighing.
“I know,” said Jeff, tossing his bag in the back of the Jeep. They’d had a rough practice, getting out later than usual. Everyone was rusty -- it was impossible not to be, even training during the summer. And Kent was still getting shit from that stunt at the Final, interview requests and social media nonsense and talks with PR. He’d given an interview with
Out
magazine two days prior and had another one with a different publication coming up soon.
They’d come to practice together from Kent’s house that day, piled into Jeff’s Jeep after a dubious night’s rest. They always had trouble getting back into a normal routine after going home for the summer -- at least a little -- but Kent seemed to be struggling more than usual.
He missed Eric.
And cooking dinner after such an awful practice sounded like way,
way
too much work. Jeff rubbed his temples before turning his key in the ignition. “I don’t wanna cook tonight,” he said.
“We can heat up leftovers,” Kent said. “I should have enough.” His eyes were closed. “We can empty my fridge and catch up on TV.”
“All right.” Jeff drove them to Kent’s house, both of them quiet and tired.
They ended up on the sofa with plates of leftover roasted vegetables and baked chicken.
“I’m just --” Kent stuffed a bit of chicken into his mouth. “It’d be so much easier if someone else was out,” he said, once he’d swallowed. “Not that anyone else has to do it, I get it, it’s just
fucking
exhausting.” His phone was constantly buzzing.
Jeff leaned his head in his hand. “I know,” he said. “But you know how it is. It’s hard to say you’re not straight anyway, much less to the media.”
Kent laughed. He flopped back on the sofa, slithering down into some sort of weird position that didn’t look comfortable, but probably was. “Like you would know,” he said.
Right. Like he would know.
To be fair, Jeff had never said he wasn’t straight out loud. His family had all just somehow figured him out and he didn’t really
date
people anyway, so it was a complete non-issue in his life. He shrugged one shoulder. “Whatever.”
It was quiet for a while, both of them just staring at the episode of
Brooklyn 99
on the television before Kent pushed up onto one elbow. “Jeffrey,” he said, after a minute.
Oh, boy.
Jeffrey.
If it was about practice, Jeff was going to hit him with a pillow. “Mmm?” He lifted his glass, taking a drink to prepare himself for vengeance.
“D’you like boys?”
Jeff choked on his water. Wait. What? Where was
that
coming from all of a sudden? And why did Kent have to say it like that? He coughed.
A moment later, he laughed. “Wow,” said Jeff, “very grade-school of you.”
“I’m serious,” Kent said.
Oh. Well, fuck. “Um. Why?” Jeff asked. Kent never asked him about his love life.
Not that he had a love life. But they just didn’t really talk about it, not ever. They never had. Kent never badgered him about not having a girlfriend, didn’t ask if he went on dates, and hadn’t ever said anything about his hookups beyond expressing annoyance at being kicked out of his hotel room on roadies years ago.
“Because you said
whatever
like that,” said Kent.
Jeff looked at him. What was he supposed to say? Yeah, sure, he’d kissed guys in college. It wasn’t, like. A thing. He didn’t think about it much. But --
But this was his chance, wasn’t it? This was the opening he’d been hoping for over and over for the past however many years. It was the opening he’d have jumped at three years ago, when he first heard Kent anonymously tell the internet that he was gay, before Kent met Eric.
He couldn’t lie. Which meant -- “Sometimes,” Jeff said.
The expression on Kent’s face was utterly unreadable. “Why didn’t you say something to me?” he asked, pushing himself upright again.
His movement left a bit more distance between them on the sofa. Jeff’s stomach sank a little. “Don’t be weird about it,” he said.
“I’m not,” said Kent, but Jeff knew better.
He was. He was
totally
being weird. Jeff shifted, scrubbed his palms on his shorts. His stomach hurt. What was Kent thinking? Was he really upset that Jeff hadn’t said anything? It didn’t change anything about their friendship, but -- Jeff swallowed, thinking about all his stuff in Kent’s spare bedroom.
It
could
change things. It could.
A minute later, Kent leaned over, resting his head on Jeff’s shoulder.
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
They were just watching TV in the living room, both of them sprawled on Kent’s sofa with Kevin in Jeff’s lap, snoring as one episode of
The X Files
flipped over into the next. Jeff let out a soft breath, closing his eyes for a moment. His neck hurt. They’d had a rough practice that day, and after dinner and Kent’s normal call with Eric, they were both exhausted.
A bit later, Kent pulled his fingers through Jeff’s hair. The touch was soft, gentle, maybe a bit mindless -- just a rhythmic sort of stroking, fingers dragging through hair over and over. It felt
amazing
. Jeff shut his eyes, leaning into the touch as a tiny chill went down his spine. Kent’s nails dragged over his scalp and Jeff sucked in a quick breath as warmth bloomed in his stomach.
His eyes sprang open a second later as he realized what was happening. Well, fuck. That was -- inconvenient. What, was his hair just like, wired to his dick or something? He had to get it under control. Kent’s thumb grazed the back of his neck and Jeff shuddered a little.
Get your dick under control, Troy
. Jesus.
Jeff cleared his throat.
Kent’s hand paused. “Uh -- you don’t mind if I touch your hair,” he asked, “right?”
Mind? No. No, Jeff didn’t mind. On the contrary -- he fucking
loved
it. He’d had sex he hadn’t liked half so much. And that was… kind of a problem.
“Nah, man,” he said quickly. “It’s fine.” Jesus. Why was Kent even
asking
? He could touch Jeff whenever he wanted, however he wanted.
God, Jeff wished he would.
“Okay,” Kent said, hand moving again, tugging at Jeff’s hair. “How long are you gonna let it get?” he asked, dragging Jeff’s dark hair back into a ponytail.
Jeff shrugged one shoulder, trying to ignore the part of him that wanted Kent to pull harder. “Dunno,” he said. “Long as I want.” If Kent was going to keep touching it like that? Fuck, he’d never cut it again. “What do you think?”
“I like it,” Kent said. “It looks good.”
“It’s easy,” said Jeff, because it was. Not having to remember to get it cut was really, really easy. And he knew how to braid, anyway -- after three little sisters, he ought to.
Kent let his hair loose again and Jeff swallowed, thinking about that phone call with Eric and how he’d still not managed to say anything about the way he felt. He tilted his head as Kent’s fingers gathered all his hair up again, tugging at it a little harder.
“Don’t think I know how I braid,” Kent muttered.
“My mom can teach you,” said Jeff.
“It’s like, over under, right?” Kent asked, and Jeff laughed.
“Yeah,” he said, “it’s --” his breath caught as Kent pulled at a bit of it.
Fuck
. “It’s over under,” Jeff said.
A second later, Kent scrubbed his hand over Jeff’s head. “Ah, fuck it,” he said.
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
Kent was being weird. He’d been weird for the last like, five days, and Jeff wasn’t sure he could take much more of it. They'd just gotten back to Vegas, they needed to get ready for the season, not... whatever Kent was doing. It was distracting.
“Dude,” he said, one morning when they were relaxing with coffee after their run, “what’s up with you? Seriously. And don’t say nothing, because I’ll know you’re lying.”
Kent bit his lower lip. “I --” he sighed. “I’ve, um. I’ve been thinking.”
“Oh boy,” said Jeff.
“Shut up,” Kent said, “I’m serious. I’ve been just kind of, y’know. Thinking about my life. The future. Stuff like that.”
“Okay,” said Jeff. He waited, letting Kent fidget and glance at him a couple times. Sometimes, Kent needed a minute to get things out. He’d always been like that.
“It’s just,” Kent finally said, wrapping both hands around his mug, “Eric and were talking and I realized that every time I think about my life, you’re there.”
Jeff’s mouth went dry. What the fuck did that mean? His heart pounded in his chest.
Kent looked down at his coffee. “Eric thinks, um. Eric thinks that you might --” he bit his lower lip, closing his eyes for a moment. “That you might, um.” His hands tightened on his cup.
This was it. This was the time. He’d been waiting for the
right moment
and this -- “I love you,” Jeff said. His voice was hoarse for no reason, he sounded ridiculous.
It wasn’t how he’d imagined saying those words at all.
Kent looked up.
“I love you,” Jeff repeated. “I have for a long time. I’m sorry, I just didn’t know how to tell you. I didn’t even know you were gay at first, and --”
Kent interrupted him. “How long?”
Jeff swallowed. God, he was about to sound so stupid. So, so,
so
fucking stupid. “Since you called Julianna royalty in the airport and made her smile.”
Kent’s eyes widened. “But that was --”
“I know,” Jeff said, cutting him off. “I know when it was.” Six years ago. He was deeply aware.
Kent swallowed. He looked… stricken. “I --”
“It’s okay,” Jeff said, looking down at his hands. Kent’s face said everything, he didn’t need to hear it in words, too. Kent did not feel the same way, no matter what Eric thought. “You don’t have to say anything,” Jeff said. “I know I -- I know you’re not, um. I know you don’t --”
“
I love you
,” Kent said, the words coming out slow and practiced in Stoney.
Wait. What? Jeff looked back up, stared at Kent’s face for a minute.
Kent didn’t speak Stoney.
After a moment, Kent swallowed. “Um,” he said, cheeks pink, “did I say it wrong? I didn’t learn how to say ‘too’.”
“No,” Jeff said, eyes burning. Fuck. Who taught him? “But --”
“I’m sorry it took me so long,” Kent said, twisting shaking hands together, “I just, um. I just wanted to tell you that I love you in the language you were meant to hear it in.”
Oh, fuck. This man. Jeff swallowed again, pulling his lower lip in under his teeth. His stomach hurt.
Kent’s lips pressed together as he stared at Jeff, silent. Finally, he swallowed. “Um,” he said, voice a little rough, “okay. That’s. All right. I, um.” His knuckles were white, hands clenched around the mug in an ever-tightening grip. “Sorry. About this. I --”
Before he knew what he was doing, before he had a chance to talk himself out of it, Jeff stood and reached out, sliding a hand around the back of Kent’s neck. Pulling in close, he pressed their lips together in a heated kiss.
And that, Jeff thought, must be what kissing was like for other people, what songs and books and movies always made it out to be but it hadn’t ever really been for him. It really was like fireworks, like being lit up from the inside out. When they parted, Jeff sucked in a quick breath, bringing a hand up to brush along Kent’s jaw.
“Thank you,” Kent whispered. “I almost --”
“You’re so stupid,” said Jeff.
“I --” Kent shoved him a little. “
You’re
stupid!”
Jeff kissed him again.
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
Kent wasn’t looking at him. It wasn’t like, avoidant? At least, not exactly. It was just -- weird. It was weird. Different. And he’d been doing it since they talked.
Jeff wasn’t sure if anyone else noticed. It had only been a week since they’d had that conversation at the kitchen table, and neither of them had known what to do since then. They’d had practice and Kent had coursework and they’d just sort of… fallen back into their usual routine, nothing really changing. And like, yes. Obviously they wouldn’t be bringing anything into the dressing room, because that would be weird, and even though they hadn’t talked about it, Jeff was assuming that they wouldn’t be telling anyone that they were… whatever they were. He wasn’t sure.
Honestly, that was the frustrating part. Jeff wanted -- he didn’t even know what he wanted, not exactly, except it wasn’t this. He scrubbed at his hair with his towel, stomach in knots. They needed to
talk
about it, which completely sucked, because Jeff had never talked about defining a relationship with anyone in his life and he had no idea how people did it. Was he supposed to just casually be all, ‘so what are we, boyfriends?’ and pretend that wasn’t a ridiculous thing to say? Was he supposed to just say nothing and assume they’d figure it out later? Because that just seemed super unlikely.
Besides, they’re obviously not boyfriends. They’re not sleeping together or anything. And that -- that was another thing Jeff wanted to change. He yanked his shirt on over his head, tugged his hair out of the collar when it got stuck, dragged half of it back to tie it out of his face. He made it out to his Jeep pretty fast, slid into the driver’s seat and started the engine. Our Lady Peace blared through the speaker, and he cut the volume in half. A week wasn’t that long. Was it? Fuck, he was in a bad mood.
Taking a breath, Jeff headed out for his apartment instead of Kent’s house.
Kent texted while Jeff was out on a walk with Kevin.
where u at?
Walking kevin
, Jeff sent back.
are u at home?
Kent sent.
apartment
. Jeff pocketed his phone, finishing the walk and going back inside before checking it again. Kent hadn’t messaged again, and after checking his blood sugar, Jeff tossed his phone onto the coffee table before going into his kitchen to make dinner.
Kent let himself in about thirty minutes later, tossing his keys on the counter as he walked into the kitchen. “Are you pissed at me?” he asked.
Looking up from his skillet, Jeff blinked. “What?”
“Are you pissed at me,” Kent repeated, speaking slower.
“You pissed at me?” Jeff countered.
“No,” said Kent. “Why would you think --”
“Dude, you barely even looked at me today,” said Jeff. “It’s not that much of a stretch.”
“That’s not -- I just,” Kent said, and then stopped. He took a breath. “I’m sorry. I don’t -- I don’t really know what to do.”
“I mean, you could, like. Talk to me?” Jeff said. He turned the burner off, plated his dinner. “We just kinda -- I mean, I meant what I said, you know, that I -- but then nothing’s different now, and I feel like -- I feel like it’s supposed to be?”
“I spent so long,” Kent said, “telling myself to get over you and trying to ignore this and now I don’t know what to do, and I know that’s fucking stupid, but it’s the truth. Are we -- what is this? I mean, what do you want --”
“I just want to be around you,” said Jeff. “And, like. I, um.” His ears were hot. “I wanna, y’know.”
Fuck you.
Kent swallowed, stepped in closer. “Me too,” he said.
“Well,” said Jeff, as they stared at each other. “Cool.” Damn. He’d never had trouble like, getting someone into bed before. Kent reached for one of Jeff’s hands, slid his thumb over the skin of Jeff’s wrist and his breath caught for a second. “Um,” he said.
“Dinner,” Kent suggested, “movie. Second base?”
Jeff laughed, the tightness in his stomach loosening a little. “Yeah,” he said, “second base. Jesus. Is that --”
“It’s hand stuff,” said Kent, and Jeff laughed again.
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
Jeff was just setting his stuff down in his apartment, contemplating what the fuck he was going to eat for dinner, when his phone rang -- Shania Twain’s That Don’t Impress Me Much . It was his mother. Picking up his phone, he cradled it against his shoulder with his head as he opened his fridge. “Hi mom.”“Jeffrey,” she said, and Jeff winced.So it was that kind of call, huh? “Mother,” said Jeff. Kevin whined a little and he leaned over, reaching to scratch behind her ear.“Anything you want to tell me?” Her voice was warm, a small comfort. It sounded like he wasn’t in trouble, but she’d Jeffrey-ed him, and --“No?” said Jeff, straightening up and pulling ground turkey out, setting it on the counter.“Really, Jeffrey?” She obviously had something specific in mind.Jeff’s phone slipped a little and he grabbed for it, slapping the refrigerator door shut after grabbing some broccoli. “Mom, just tell me what you want!”She didn’t say anything.If he thought about it, though, there was really only one thing that’d have her calling him like that: Kent. She knew. She knew . She had to. But how? Did -- wait. Jeff chewed his lower lip, thinking.Someone taught Kent how to say I love you in Stoney. He knew Christopher didn’t do it. “Did you teach him how to say it?” Jeff asked, after a moment.“Yes,” she said.Dumping the turkey into a skillet, Jeff flicked the heat on. His stomach hurt. “When?”She laughed. “A few months back.”“So you’re calling to what, confirm that he talked to me?” His voice was coming out pissy, he knew it was coming out pissy, but he just couldn’t… stop.Mom stopped laughing. “I just hadn’t heard anything from you,” she said. “Kent called every day for a week to practice, and I just thought -- is everything okay?” She paused. “Are you okay?”“I’m fine.” Jeff whacked at his broccoli with a knife, sending a bit of stem flying.She told him months ago, she said. Months. And --Fuck. Jeff let out a heavy breath. “Okay,” he said, after a moment. He scraped the broccoli into the skillet with the browned turkey. “Okay. Um. Yeah, mom. I’m, um.” Damn. It was hard to actually say it. But why? Why would it be hard to actually say it? It wasn’t hard to say when he told… Jeff frowned, trying to think of someone he’d told about Kent.Swallowing, he realized that he hadn’t told anyone.“We’re dating,” Jeff said, after a long pause. I think .“Are you happy about it?” she asked.Jeff’s shoulders dropped. “Of course I am, mom. It’s -- it’s great, it’s just. New? And I haven’t really, like. Done this before.”“I know, honey.” She was rustling around in the kitchen, Jeff could hear clinking dishes. “But you have to know, don’t you, that you two have basically been dating for a long time?”Why did everyone think that? Jeff sighed. “I guess.”“That boy was so nervous asking me how to say it,” she said. “I could hear his nausea through the phone, I swear. I’m sure he just wanted to make sure it was right.”Jeff smiled a little. That sounded like Kent. “He likes things to be perfect.” He finished and plated his food. God, he was starving. Shoving a forkful of broccoli in his mouth, Jeff sat down on his sofa.“How is he doing? He should’ve called me.” she asked. And then, “don’t talk with your mouth full. I’ll wait.”Jeff chewed and swallowed. “He’s good. Beginning of the season’s always kind of a mess, you know that. And Eric had to go back to school, so --”She interrupted him. “Eric?”“Yeah,” said Jeff. “You remember Eric, right? Small? Blond? Makes like, really good pies?”“Yes, I remember him,” she said. There was a pause, and something in Jeff’s stomach twisted a little. “Is Kent still dating Eric?”“Yes,” said Jeff, hunching his shoulders even though she couldn’t see him. His neck was tight, all of a sudden.“So you’re…”“Dating Kent, too,” Jeff said, aware of how it sounded. “Too.” It didn’t sound like she liked that.Jeff sighed, setting his plate aside. “Mom --”“And Eric knows this?” she asked. “Is this why it took so long?”“Mom!” Jeff yanked at a piece of his hair. God, really? Did she think they’d have some kind of clandestine -- “ Yes ,” he said. “Eric knows. Of course he knows, I wouldn’t -- what kind of guy d'you think I am, huh? And I don’t know why it took so long, I’m not a mind reader.” He paused. “Eric’s happy about it.”“And if he wasn’t happy,” she said. “Would you and Kent still be dating?”Jeff swallowed. He knew the answer, he just didn’t want to say it. He hated thinking about it.“Jeff,” his mother said, her voice softer.“No.” Jeff took a breath, hoped it sounded less shaky over the phone than it did to him. “We wouldn’t.”If Eric wanted him to, Kent would end it. Immediately, Jeff was sure, no questions asked. Hell, the only reason Kent said anything to him at all was because Eric suggested it. Jeff wasn’t stupid. If there ever came a time that Kent had to choose between them, Jeff had no doubts about who he’d choose -- and it wasn’t him.“You are worth so much more than that,” his mom said, after a long pause, voice thick. “Jeffrey, honey.”“Don’t.”“You know how much I love Kent,” she said. “We all do. But --”“Mom, don’t.” Jeff swallowed. “I don’t care. I’m--” he waved a hand, coming up empty. What was he trying to say? That if this was all he could ever be, second place to Eric Bittle, he’d do it? That he’d do anything to stay with Kent? She’d never understand that. It was stupid.“I want to be with him,” said Jeff, after a moment, voice louder, “in whatever way I can. For as long as I can. And I know I’m being fucking stupid, okay, I --”“Language,” she hissed.“It’s enough, mom! It’s enough. And I know that’s pathetic!” He didn’t mean to yell at her, but he couldn’t stop. “Okay? I don't want anyone else. I’m an idiot and I don’t know anything about relationships, you think I don't know that? And I’m setting myself up for heartbreak, right? I know it’s stupid and pitiable, or whatever, but I don’t fucking care!”“Jeffrey Roland Troy!” She set something down on the counter hard enough that the sound echoed through the phone. “Don’t you talk to me like that.”Holy shit. What was he doing ?Jeff took a deep breath, closed his eyes. What the hell was the matter with him? He never yelled at his mom. “I’m sorry,” he said. “Mom. I’m sorry. I just, I --”“I just don’t understand,” she said, after a little silence.“Kent has two boyfriends,” said Jeff. “I’m one of them. That’s pretty much it.”Her voice was soft. “I just want you to be happy, peanut.”She hadn’t called him peanut in a long time. “I am,” said Jeff. Because he was, honestly. It was just weird, trying to navigate whatever he was doing with Kent, because he’d never really thought it could happen.And he was really scared of messing it up. “Mom?”“Yes?”“What if I’m not a good boyfriend?” Jeff rubbed the back of his neck. “Like, I don’t really know -- I don’t know how to do it.”“Yes you do, honey.” She paused. “Just be yourself.”“Worst advice ever, mom,” said Jeff. “That’s not even helpful.”She laughed.
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
“Can I ask you something?”
“You just did.” Jeff grinned, but it slid off his face when Kent didn’t smile back. Was it something bad? “What is it?”
“When’s the last time you --” Kent broke off, bit his lip. His cheeks reddened.
Jeff frowned. “Last time I what?” he asked, when silence stretched between them long enough that to grate on the nerves.
“Uh,” said Kent, finally. “Got laid?”
Jeff choked on his Gatorade.
“Are you f-- Jesus, Kent,” he said, once he’d stopped coughing. When
was
the last time he got laid, though? Months, at least. Thinking about it, Jeff realized he actually wasn’t sure.
Jerking off in the shower did not count, obviously. And, like. Jeff did that a lot. He’d been doing it a lot for a while, now that he thought about it, instead of picking up. He didn’t exactly want to tell Kent that, especially not since he was hoping it’d be somewhat less necessary now. Jeff wasn’t sure what kind of frequency Kent was looking for when it came to sex, but he’d basically never found himself not in the mood.
Especially after a game.
“It’s a valid question!” Kent’s face was a bit red. “You used to pick up all the time.”
“Yeah, I haven’t -- you know I haven’t done that in a while.” Jeff set his drink down.
“How long is a while?” Kent asked.
“I don’t know, okay?” Now Jeff’s chest felt a little tight. He’d stopped picking up well before playoffs, right? It’d been months. “Before Christmas, maybe?”
“That was like, a long time ago,” said Kent.
“Yeah, I know.” Jeff grabbed his Gatorade bottle again. “So? When’s the last time
you
got laid?”
“The morning Eric left for Massachusetts,” said Kent, no pause for thought needed.
Right, of course. Jeff took a drink, not saying anything for a moment. Where was this going? They hadn’t even figured out what they were to each other, not really. And Kent didn’t seem like he was in a hurry. “Why?”
“I was just wondering,” Kent mumbled, reaching for Jeff’s drink. He was worse than Jeff’s little sisters.
“You have your own, brat,” Jeff said, pulling it back.
“But yours is red!” Kent had the gross purple one.
Jeff sighed and handed it over. “Seriously, why are you asking?”
Kent shrugged one shoulder. After taking a
huge
swig of the beverage, he shoved it back into Jeff’s hand. “You have like, a high sex drive, right?”
“Oh my god, dude.” Jeff’s sex drive wasn’t what they needed to be talking about. Rolling his eyes, he chugged the last of his Gatorade. “Sure.”
“Like, you used to go out after every game,” Kent said.
“Yeah, Kent,” Jeff said, “I like to get laid.”
“So if we --”
“Listen, if you’re trying to figure out if I’m like, down to fuck, trust me,” said Jeff, “I am. Okay?”
“
Jeff
,” Kent hissed.
“What?” Jeff tossed his bottle at the trash can. “We’re the only ones in here.”
“I wasn’t --”
“What are we?” Jeff asked, interrupting whatever nonsense Kent was about to say. It didn’t matter how often either of them wanted to fuck, how either of them felt about it, not really, not until they’d figured out what the hell they were doing. They weren’t going to do anything until the relationship was secure. Kent wasn’t exactly a super chill go with the flow kind of guy. He needed to
know
.
Kent stared at him. “What?”
Jeff repeated himself, slower this time. “What are we?”
Hand tightening around his bottle of disgusting purple Gatorade, Kent stared at Jeff for a moment. “What do you want to be?” he asked, finally.
Was he for real? Jeff told Kent he loved him and Kent still had to ask? Jesus. Jeff wanted to fucking
marry
him. “You are fucking killing me.” Jeff ran both hands through his hair, scrubbing his nails over his scalp, letting out a heavy breath. “
Boyfriends
, Kent. What the hell else? What do
you
want to be?”
“I --” Hunching his shoulders, Kent glanced away from Jeff’s face. “Boyfriends is good.”
Was it? Really? Jeff reached out, wrapping his fingers around Kent’s wrist. He ran his thumb over the soft skin, the jump of Kent’s pulse. “Hey,” he murmured.
“Hey,” Kent said, voice soft.
“Look, I just wanna be with you,” said Jeff. “And I don’t want you to think I’m not serious. I -- we can do this however you want. If you don’t want to label it, I get it. I just --” he swallowed. He was about to sound so stupid, but… “I want to be yours. And I want to be sure about it.”
“You are,” Kent said. “I do. Want to label it, I mean. I just like, I don’t want this to be some huge thing, it’s bad enough for Eric, and --”
“I’m not asking for a press conference,” Jeff said.
“But it’s not because I don’t want people to know,” said Kent.
“I get it.” He did, really. Jeff didn’t want to jump into the media circus, either. His family knew and he didn’t particularly care if anyone else found out, but he didn’t feel the need to make a public announcement.
Kent swallowed. “We can do this however you want,” he said.
Jeff grinned. “Okay,” he said. “You wanna go steady?”
“Oh my god.” Kent bent down to put his shoes on. “What’s next, you want my letter jacket?”
Jeff’s eyes widened. “Do you have one?”
Kent glanced up at him. “Well, yeah,” he said. “I lettered in hockey.”
“Of course you did.” Jeff paused. “Give it to me.”
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
“So,” Eric said, and Jeff winced a little. Kent was gone to the bathroom, leaving just Jeff and the animals on the Skype call with Eric. Jeff wasn’t sure what kind of look Eric was giving him, not exactly, he just knew he didn’t like it.
“So?”
“Well --” Eric laughed. “Jeff, c’mon. How are things? I mean, you guys… talked, right?”
“Yes,” said Jeff, because they did. Kent told him he loved him in Stoney and Jeff was, honestly, still not over it, might never be over it. Nothing else had happened, but -- he swallowed, looked down at his hands. “Thank you.”
“Oh, you’re welcome, honey,” said Eric.
Jeff glanced back up. Surely Kent talked to Eric about it, right? Eric chewed his lower lip, fidgeting a little.
“Are you happy?”
Jeff blinked. “Yeah,” he said. “I -- of course I am. Are you?” Was it his imagination, or was the smile on Eric’s face just a little bit… off? He scrubbed his fingers over his scalp, flipped his hair out of his face a little. Eric still hadn’t said anything, and Jeff’s stomach sank. “If you’re not, you should tell him.”
If Eric told Kent he wasn’t happy with Kent and Jeff doing… whatever the hell they were doing, he still didn’t know, then Kent would end it. Jeff knew that. He’d never come before Eric in Kent’s life, not ever.
“It’s not that,” said Eric.
“You don’t really seem, like. Stoked,” Jeff said. He realized, suddenly, that he was dragging his fingers through his hair again, a nervous habit. Jeff put his hand on his ankle, stared down at it. “If it, uh. If it makes you feel better,” he offered, “nothing has happened. Like, besides the talking.”
Eric nodded. “Yeah.” He paused. “I mean, no. It doesn’t make me feel better, I mean. I -- you don’t have to hold back on my account. You know that, right?”
“I’m not really leading the charge on this one,” said Jeff. He glanced up at the camera again.
Eric’s face, a bit pink in the cheeks, was very serious. He had big eyes, Jeff realized. “Maybe you should,” Eric said.
Maybe he should? What, come on to Kent first?
That didn’t sit right with Jeff, somehow. “No,” he said, after a minute. “I wanna do it in his time.”
Eric smiled, softening. “Of course you do,” he said.
“He does what?” Kent leaned over into view.
“Nothing,” said Jeff, cheeks heating.
Kent looked at him, and it was weird, being able to see Kent looking at him on camera -- really looking at him, all soft and warm the way he looked at Eric. Jeff turned his head, smiled a little. “What?”
“Nothing,” Kent said, and on the other side of the country, Eric laughed.
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
Kent slid a hand around the back of Jeff’s neck, pulling him closer, widening his thighs. Jeff stepped in between them, pressing against the counter. He braced himself with one hand against a cabinet door, slid the other arm around Kent’s waist, leaned into the kiss. It was the most perfect -- sweet --Kent nipped at his lower lip and Jeff gasped a little, feeling it in a shiver that went all the way down his spine.Fuck, he hadn’t had sex in way too long.Wrapping his mind around the fact that Eric was okay with this had taken a little time. In that time, almost nothing had changed. They still hadn’t gone much further than a little bit of kissing, most of their time taken up with work and life and being in the familiar routine they’d been in for years -- working out, going to practice, cooking. Jeff hadn’t even managed to sleep in Kent’s bed yet.There was also the fact that Kent never initiated anything. Jeff was pretty sure that was a holdover from a previous relationship, but he couldn’t imagine Eric treating Kent badly. When he saw Eric and Kent together, Kent wasn’t shy about physical contact. Still, Kent never touched him first, not like that, and Jeff wasn’t sure if it was because he didn’t want to or if it was something else. He knew Kent hadn’t approved of his sleeping around so much. Maybe he didn’t want to be with Jeff because of… that. Maybe Jeff should, like. Make sure that he wasn’t being pushy or something.“Kent,” he murmured, hand on Kent’s thigh, “hang on. Is this okay? I mean --”“It’s fine,” Kent said. He pulled back. “Unless you don’t want to, um. I’m sorry.”“No! What?” Jeff could not think of a single thing he wanted more, but ‘fine’ wasn’t the most enthusiastic response. “It’s not that.” It was just that Jeff had never, like, been with a guy before. He’d made out with some guys in college, but that wasn’t really the same. In his opinion, that didn’t really count. Dreams didn’t count, either.And Kent never touched him first. Jeff swallowed.“If you don’t, you know -- I know you don’t, um. I mean I know that you’re not --” Kent was clearly searching for the words to explain what was happening. “-- I know you prefer women.”What? “No, I prefer you ,” Jeff said. “I’m -- not straight, I mean." Didn't that go without saying? "I made out with guys in college, it’s not like I never thought about it before, so it’s not… like that. Okay?” He rubbed at Kent’s thighs with his both hands.“Okay,” said Kent, but something in the way he said it sounded off.Jeff chewed his lip. “But if you don’t want to,” he said, after a minute, “because of, um. I don’t know, because of how much I used to --”“What?” Kent’s hands were flat against Jeff’s chest. “No. I don’t care about that.”“Yes you do,” Jeff said, bringing his hands to up curl around Kent’s. “I’ve seen your face enough when you saw me to know. And, like. ‘Fine’ isn’t exactly the kind of enthusiasm I was hoping for.”Kent swallowed. “I’m just not as, uh. Experienced? As you. I’ve only ever been with two people. And you’re…”Jeff grinned a little, hoped it was reassuring. “Kind of a slut?”Kent frowned. “Jeff, I didn’t say that.”He didn’t say it, no. But he’d definitely thought it, more than once. Jeff knew that, had known that for a long time.Fuck, two people? Two people. Jeff didn’t even know how many people he’d been with. He’d never counted. “Kent, I --” He pulled away, running his hands through his hair. “Listen, I know this is, like. Kind of fucked up, but I can’t even remember most of those girls. I don’t remember their names or what the night was like. It was just…” Jeff shrugged. “It was just sex. I don’t know. I didn’t care about it. It didn’t mean anything.”“Yeah,” Kent said, voice soft. He was looking down at his hands. “I know.”“It’s not like that with you,” said Jeff. “Hey.” He brought a hand up to cup Kent’s cheek, leaned forward to kiss him again. Resting their foreheads together, he sighed. “It’s not like that.”“I know,” said Kent.“I don’t -- look, I want to do everything with you,” Jeff said. “Whatever you want. Whenever you want to do it. But I’m, like.” Fuck.“We’ll get there,” said Kent.“Sure,” Jeff said. “Okay.”
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
Normally, Jeff tried to give Kent some space when he was talking to Eric at home. They hung out a lot, so to speak, during the season -- because Kent watched TV with Jeff, so Eric watched, too, and they’d all kind of gotten into a rhythm with it. It was nice. But at home, Jeff knew how it went. Kent and Eric belonged upstairs, and Jeff stayed downstairs.
Usually.
Not when Kent’s phone was screaming some fucking Drake song. That was a work call, so Jeff grabbed the thing off the kitchen table and headed upstairs. Not bothering to knock, he pushed Kent’s door open. “Your phone’s ringing,” he said, holding out the offending item.
“Aw, fuck,” said Kent, “that’s the GM’s ringtone. I gotta take this, here --” he shoved his laptop into Jeff’s hands. “Talk amongst yourselves.”
“I --” Jeff didn’t usually spend time in Kent and Eric’s room, but Kent was gone before Jeff could say anything. On screen, Eric rubbed the back of his neck, glancing away. He was in his room at school, hair damp from a shower.
It was weird, kind of, talking to him again after the summer. They’d spent more time together than ever before, and Jeff sort of… well, the summer was nice. They had dinner and Eric absent-mindedly called Jeff ‘honey’, which --
Jeff chewed his lower lip for a moment as he sat down on the bed. “So,” he said, finally. Eric and Kent had been talking about something that seemed kind of important.
“So,” Eric said, looking at him, his cheeks a bit pink. “You, uh. Y’all --”
Oh, no. Jeff did not feel like answering Kent-and-Jeff-relationship questions. “What did you say you wanted there, bro?” he asked, cutting Eric off.
“Nothing,” Eric said.
Jeff raised a brow.
After a minute, Eric sighed and ran a hand through his hair. “I don’t know,” he said. “There’s just one guy on my team, y’know, I just. He’s not like, a
part
of the team?”
“Ah,” said Jeff. He sat, then, just quietly waiting. After a few minutes, Eric launched into this long explanation about how this kid was so
talented
and he really reminded him of
Jack
but he just wouldn’t
connect
with anyone. Jeff blinked a little, letting Eric ramble on a bit. When Eric finally paused to breathe, Jeff cleared his throat.
“Why don’t you go ahead and take about twenty percent off ’er there, bud,” he said, because it was a little nicer than just saying ‘calm the fuck down’ and Eric didn’t even seem halfway close to done. “Nobody’s perfect, fuck.”
Eric blinked, frowned. “But --”
“Some guys just don’t wanna do the whole, like, thing,” said Jeff. There was always one in a room. “It’s fine. If it’s not on the ice, it’s not important. I mean, like. You said he’s playing well. So stop trying to force everybody to be all
Happy Days
with you.”
Eric sighed. “I am not,” he said, “forcing anybody to --”
“Just let the guy live, damn,” said Jeff, cutting Eric off again.
The door pushed open again and Kent stepped in, tossed his phone on the bedside table.“Jeff, stop antagonizing Eric.”
“Oh my god,” said Jeff, leaning back on one arm to look at Kent, “I wasn’t even doing anythi--”
“Yeah,” Eric said, “stop antagonizing your boyfriend’s boyfriend.”
“Hey!” Turning back around, Jeff ran a hand through his hair, pulling it out of his face. “I’m just being honest, man!”
“Horizontal violence,” said Eric, and Jeff rolled his eyes.
Climbing back into bed, Kent had to crawl over him, bracing his weight on Jeff’s shoulders. He still smelled clean from his shower and Jeff couldn’t help but curl a hand around the back of one of Kent’s thighs. They paused for a moment, Kent half in Jeff’s lap. Grasping Kent’s other thigh, Jeff leaned in to kiss him, grinning when they parted. Flushed, Kent swatted at him before pushing away to settle on the bed again. He let out a soft little sigh as he got settled, fidgeting with the sheets.
“I miss you,” Eric said, eyes large and dark on screen when Jeff looked again.
Jeff knew that look. Eric’s voice was soft, lonely. How had they lasted so long, been able to handle long distance for years? Jeff turned to look at Kent.
“I miss you, too,” Kent said, eyes on Eric, that same darkness in his gaze. Jeff reached out to run his thumb over the swell of Kent’s cheekbone. “Wish you were here,” Kent murmured.
“Soon,” said Jeff. He glanced at Eric on the screen, smiled softly. University was almost over; Eric would graduate soon, and Jeff had no illusions about where he’d move. Eric was coming to Vegas, whether Kent believed it or not.
“Soon,” Eric agreed, and Jeff found that he looked forward to it.
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
“So,” Jeff said, rubbing at his hair with a towel. They were some of the last guys left in the dressing room.“So,” said Kent.“Um. D’you wanna, like.” Jeff paused, glanced around. “Go on a date? With me?”Kent’s brow furrowed. “Like, go out somewhere?” he asked, tugging his shirt on.“Or whatever,” Jeff said, quickly. “Just --”“Yeah,” Kent said. “I -- yeah. That sounds nice.”In the car, Kent glanced over at Jeff. “I haven’t really ever been, like. Asked on a date before,” he said, after a minute.Jeff frowned as he threw his Jeep into reverse. “Ever?” he asked. “What about Eric?”“Well -- I mean, we’re not really.” Kent waved a hand. “We got together online, I guess? Technically? And, um. We kinda skipped that?”“But it’s been years,” Jeff said.“I mean, we’ve had dates?” Kent said. “I think? I just -- I asked him, or we kind of just… planned something. I don’t know. There wasn’t like a whole ‘will you go out with me’ thing.”Jeff frowned. He supposed that technically, they’d skipped that whole phase, too. It was just that Jeff didn’t really want to skip that phase, because --Well, it seemed like something Kent would really like. “Thursday,” Jeff said. “We don’t have a game. So let’s have a date.”As it turned out, Jeff didn’t really know anything about dating. He knew he didn’t want to go out to a really fancy place, because while it wouldn’t be weird for them to be seen together in public, Kent was pretty famously taken -- and anything that looked even remotely date-like could cause problems. And just going out to a normal place they always went to seemed kind of, well. Like a cop-out.He decided, finally, on Thursday morning because he hadn’t been able to come up with anything sooner, that they’d stay in. At his place, not Kent’s, because Jeff did actually like his apartment and because more often than not, he stayed at Kent’s anyway. Hanging out at Jeff’s place would be different. He could make it different.It took him a bit to find the Christmas lights in the hall closet. After stringing them around the living room, Jeff made a pile of every pillow and blanket he owned. Staring down at it, he chewed his lower lip as Kevin wagged her tail from the middle of the pile. He had enough of them, right? The only way to tell was building.“Move it, sister,” he said, waving a hand at Kevin. He had a fort to build.That evening, a soft knock at the door startled Jeff. Why was Kent knocking ? “Weirdo,” he muttered, heading to the front door and yanking it open, praying the risotto didn’t burn while he wasn’t stirring it. “Why are you kno--” Kent was in a suit. The dark blue suit Jeff liked, a burgundy tie, and his glasses. He looked great.In his jeans and henley, Jeff suddenly felt remarkably underdressed. His socks had little fried eggs and bacon all over them, for crying out loud. His hair was in some sort of bun-like mess.“Is that what you’re wearing?” Kent asked.“Uh,” Jeff said, after a minute, tucking a stray bit of hair behind his ear. Fuck, was his plan like, not good enough? Kent looked amazing and he’d just planned to stay in and watch a movie. “Well -- I didn’t know you were gonna wear a suit.”
“You didn’t tell me what kind of date it was,” Kent pointed out. He looked at Jeff’s socks. “Are we not going somewhere?”
Honestly, it was too late to change plans, even if they were stupid. “Nope.” Jeff took a step back, motioning Kent into the apartment. He shut the door behind them and waited while Kent took in the soft, twinkling lights and the blanket fort in the living room. Jeff had even managed to find a candle or two in the closet, had them burning on the table. After a moment, Kent turned to him, a soft smile on his face.
“What is this? Did you make a blanket fort?”
“It’s our date,” said Jeff, taking Kent’s hand. “C’mon, I gotta stir stuff.” He tugged him into the kitchen. “So, okay. It’s not, like, suit-worthy, but to be fair, I didn’t think you were gonna game day me, so –”
“You said date!” Kent shoved him a little. “Date implies dressing nice!”
“Yeah, yeah.” Jeff stirred the risotto. It only needed a bit more time. “Well, you know where stuff is. You can change into something else if you want, because we are not really doing suit-friendly activities.”
Kent arched a brow, leaning on the kitchen counter, just watching Jeff cook. “We’re not, are we?” he said, and something in his tone brought heat to the back of Jeff’s neck. He hadn’t meant like that , except that Jeff was basically always up for that and if Kent was actually, like --Jeff had to stop thinking about it. He cleared his throat. “Yeah, I figured we would just, y’know. Hang out,” he said. Because that’s what a date was, right? Spending time together? “I made sure that you can see the TV from the fort,” Jeff continued. “My plan was like, chill.”“Right,” said Kent. “So you want me to change?”“If you want,” Jeff said. “It’s no big --”“I’ll change,” Kent said, waving a hand as he pushed off the counter. “Or you’ll keep being weird about it.”“I’m not being weird,” Jeff muttered into the risotto.Kent returned in a pair of jeans he’d somehow managed to leave at Jeff’s apartment at some point and one of Jeff’s hoodies, the really old one he always made fun of. The bottom half was orange and the top purple, Jeff had gotten it as a hand-me-down from his cousin, and it was soft as hell. “This thing is really soft,” he said.“You make fun of me when I wear it,” said Jeff.“Well -- look at it,” said Kent, motioning down his torso. “It’s hideous.”Jeff liked it. He shrugged. “I don’t think it’s that bad,” he said. It looked good on Kent, really. Turning off the heat, he pulled the pan of risotto off the burner.Once they were both settled into the blanket fort, bowls of food in hand, Jeff grabbed for the remote. He pressed buttons until the movie he’d put in started playing. Leaning back, he stuffed a bite of rice into his mouth.“ The Blues Brothers ?” Kent said, after a minute.“Yeah,” said Jeff, around his mouthful. He swallowed. “Uh. Well, because --”
“Because it’s the first movie we ever watched together,” Kent interrupted, turning to look at him. “Right?”
“Yeah,” said Jeff, cheeks heating just a little. They’d watched it the night Kent came to Vegas, after a family dinner, back when they didn’t really know each other.“God, you’re such a sap,” Kent said.“Whatever,” Jeff said, stirring his risotto to cool it down a little.“I love it,” said Kent, voice soft.They were a good two-thirds of the way through the movie, Kent tucked up against Jeff’s side, when Jeff got up to put their dishes in the sink. He was crouching to settle back into the blanket fort when Kent looked up at him.“Hey,” Kent said. That sweatshirt was huge on him, probably objectively ridiculous, but something about seeing him in it made Jeff’s stomach hurt.“Hey,” said Jeff. He gave Kent a slow smile. “I love you.”Kent reached for him then, hooking a hand around the back of Jeff’s neck and yanking him down until their lips met. Jeff had to brace himself with one hand against the sofa to keep from falling on top of Kent entirely. He settled for straddling him, ignoring the protest from his knees.It was almost like a dream: Kent underneath of him, tugging at his hair, one hand already under Jeff’s shirt and teeth sharp against his neck. Kent’s hand slid around to push against the small of his back, forcing their hips closer together, and fuck. He was hard, Jeff could feel it against his thigh, wanted to feel more.His skin felt hot everywhere Kent touched, and Jeff sucked in a sharp breath when Kent twisted under him, the friction both so good and frustratingly not good enough. They weren’t -- Jeff was too tall for it, they didn’t fit right, so he wound an arm around Kent’s waist and shoved back against the sofa.“Hey--” Kent grabbed for Jeff’s shoulders, fingers digging in hard. He took the cue, though, settling onto Jeff’s lap, laughing when Jeff gripped his ass, shifted him. “You done?”“Almost,” Jeff said, tugging Kent’s hips forward until he heard a small catch of breath. “Now I am.”“Brat,” said Kent. He pulled the hair tie out of Jeff’s hair, raking his fingers through it. Jeff kissed him again and Kent’s fingers tightened, hand curling into a fist, because he must’ve figured out that the harder he pulled Jeff’s hair the more --Jeff gasped a little, gripped the worn fabric of Kent’s hoodie. “Take this off.” He nipped at the skin of Kent’s neck for a moment before pulling back, tossing the hoodie somewhere, anywhere, it didn’t matter. Jeff tugged his own shirt off before he smoothed his hands over Kent’s bare sides, allowed himself a moment to just look at him.And like, fuck. He was so hot. Kent had put on weight over the summer, like always, weight that showed up in dense muscle and thick thighs. The summer’s freckles spread over his shoulders, disappearing near the curve of his bicep. The edges of that Olympic rings tattoo peeked out of the waistband of Kent’s jeans, barely visible.Jeff was just reaching for him again when Kent spoke.“Let me --” Kent stopped.“What?” Jeff leaned back, took a breath. Fuck, stopping now was going to suck . He could do it, of course he could, just. Damn. Worse than usual.“Let me blow you,” Kent said, and for a minute, Jeff wasn’t sure if he’d hallucinated it or not.He’d heard it wrong. Right? “What?” he repeated.Kent’s neck reddened a little. “Can I blow you?” he asked, hand on the fly of Jeff’s jeans.Not a hallucination. And he was waiting for an answer . “Oh my god,” Jeff said, quickly, “ yeah .” Christ.Kent pushed him down, tugging at Jeff’s jeans. It took a second for Jeff’s brain to catch up, for him to unclip his insulin pump from the waistband and shove the denim down his thighs with absolutely no ceremony whatsoever. He’d done this a thousand times, but it was -- it felt different, all of it, Kent’s hands on his skin, the scrape of nails as his boxer briefs came down, the heat of skin against skin. Kent paused, staring, and Jeff sat up on his elbows. “It’s okay if y--”And then strong fingers wrapped around his cock and whatever he was going to say didn’t matter any more.“D’you like --” Kent’s eyes were silver in the low light, watching Jeff’s face as he thumbed the foreskin back from the head of Jeff’s cock.Ah. It wasn’t the first time Jeff slept with someone who hadn’t seen an uncut dick before. Or, well. Touched one. “Yeah,” he said, “you can just let it slide.” Kent slid the skin forward again and Jeff shivered.He wasn’t quite ready when Kent just leaned forward, taking him in, mouth slick, hot, vaguely overwhelming because it’d been --Jeff wasn’t even sure when the last time he got laid was, who he was with. It didn’t matter. The only thing that mattered was Kent’s tongue against the head of Jeff’s dick, the way he didn’t even flinch when Jeff’s hips jerked forward. It was hard to force himself to stay still, to not just fist his hand in Kent’s hair and fuck his throat. When Kent pulled off the next time it happened, dragged his thumb up the underside of Jeff’s cock, Jeff slid a hand down, grazed his fingers over Kent’s hair.“Sorry,” he said, “I’m --”“You can,” Kent murmured, breath hot against Jeff’s thigh, jaw faintly rough with stubble. “I can take it.” He glanced up again, leaned his head into Jeff’s hand for a moment.Jesus fucking Christ. Jeff curled tentative fingers into blond hair, trying not to pull too hard when Kent gripped his cock again, circling his tongue around the head before swallowing him down.He hadn’t lied, saying he could take it. Kent took all of it, every thrust, gazing up at Jeff like he wanted it, mouth red and wet. Jeff slid his thumb over the corner of it, pushing in next to his cock, and Kent took that, too, mouth stretching a little more. He tightened his grip on the base of Jeff’s dick, dragged his hand up the shaft. When his tongue slipped under the foreskin, Jeff’s hips jerked, and he couldn’t -- there was no way he wasn’t going to come, right then, and he couldn’t even manage to say anything before Kent was swallowing.Jeff fell back against the pillows on the floor again, gasping a little, all the air punched out of him. Fuck . His hands and feet were tingling. Was that normal? He’d never experienced it before. Then again, he didn’t think he’d ever come so hard in his life, either – especially not just from getting head. Lifting his hands, he ran them over his face and up into his hair. “Fuck,” he muttered. “‘M sorry, I didn’t --”
Kent let out a soft laugh, settling on top of Jeff with a lazy sort of ease. “I don’t care,” he said. He crossed his arms on Jeff’s chest and let his chin rest on top of them. “I love you.”
Jeff swallowed. “C’mere,” he said.
Kent laughed again. He leaned up, pressing a soft kiss to Jeff’s mouth. “I’m right here,” he said. A pause. “Is it always like that for you, then?”
“No,” Jeff said, “never.” He cupped Kent’s face with one hand, brushed his thumb across Kent’s cheek.
“First time with a guy’s really something, huh?” Kent grinned, tilting his head to lean into the touch.
“I don’t think so,” Jeff said, rubbing his thumb over the edge of Kent’s jaw. “It’s just you.”Kent brushed the tips of his fingers along Jeff’s forehead, ran them down the side of his face. “I really don’t deserve you,” he said.“Stop. Yes, you do,” said Jeff. “You’re amazing. And I’ve been waiting for this for like, ever, so don’t ruin it with self deprecation.”Kent laughed.“Shit,” said Jeff. He needed to return the favor. He hadn’t exactly planned on their first time being on his living room floor -- and it was weird, he realized, that he cared so much, had thought about what their first time would be like. His head still felt a little fuzzy.“What?”“Just,” Jeff said, “just give me a minute.” They needed to go to bed. He wanted to -- he wanted to do this in bed.“I’m not going anywhere,” said Kent. “You can have as many minutes as you want.”“Not even to bed?” Jeff asked, and his voice sounded a bit whiny even to his own ears. He needed to unhook his insulin pump if they were going to bed, he didn’t like leaving it on, and --Kent laughed, wound a piece of Jeff’s hair around his index finger. “You not comfortable? It’s your fort.” He frowned, a moment later. “Jeff, are you okay? What’s your --” Kent pushed up off of him, reached into his back pocket for his phone to answer his own question.Jeff's head was a bit fuzzy. “I think I need some juice,” he said, a moment later, when he realized his phone was making the 'low blood sugar' alert sound too, the same as Kent's, catching up with his continuous monitor.“You do.” Kent stood up. “Stay.” He headed for the kitchen, leaving Jeff to pull his jeans back on, clipping the pump to the waistband. Returning with a couple of juice boxes in one hand, Kent crouched down next to him.Once he’d downed two of them, Jeff felt a bit better. Usually he planned better than that -- he’d had a whole system down before, made sure he checked his sugar beforehand and had something nearby in case it dropped, suspended the pump if he felt he needed to. He hadn’t even thought about it.“Is this like, a normal thing?” Kent asked.“Kind of?” Jeff shrugged. “I can take the pump off if I’m gonna be fucking for awhile,” he said. “I kind of bottom out if I don’t. I mean, I usually plan ahead.”“Oh,” said Kent. He chewed his lip for a minute. “Uh, you didn’t plan ahead tonight?”Jeff blinked. “I -- didn’t want to assume anything,” he said, words coming out slow. “We haven’t really, uh. Gotten that far? But I’m totally prepared now, so if you wanna go to bed --”“You don’t have to,” Kent said, cutting him off, “it’s no big deal, I --”Fucking hell. “ Kent . I swear to god,” said Jeff, “if you don’t let me touch your dick I’m gonna lose my mind.”Flushing, Kent laughed. “Shut up.”“I’m serious.” Jeff brushed his thumb over the soft skin on Kent’s inner wrist. “Unless you don’t want to, obviously, but I’m really -- I just -- can we please go to bed?”“You’re really hard up for me, huh?” Kent grinned.“Not at this exact second,” said Jeff, and Kent snorted. “Give a man some time.” He leaned forward, catching Kent’s mouth with his.They left the television showing the DVD menu and Kevin curled up on the sofa. Jeff tossed his phone onto the nightstand after setting an alarm and pushing shuffle on his music library just so they’d have background noise. Sitting on the side of the bed, Jeff pricked his finger to check his sugar, setting the meter down on the nightstand next to his extra juice. As he tossed his head to get the hair out of his eyes, he realized Kent was still in the doorway, just watching. Jeff’s neck felt hot. “What?”“Nothing,” Kent said. He pushed away from the door, nudging it shut behind him. Coming to sit next to Jeff on the bed, he looked down at the insulin pump.Jeff hadn’t felt quite so self-conscious in a long, long time. “I’m gonna take it off,” he said, because for some reason he needed to explain, wanted to apologize.“Can I?” Kent asked.Nobody had ever asked him that before. “Um,” said Jeff. “Yeah, if you want to. It just --”“I know how,” said Kent, brushing his fingers down Jeff’s side.Jeff kissed him then, hands going for hips immediately, fingers tucking into the waistband of Kent’s jeans. He wasn’t sure at what point Kent unclipped the pump and set it over on the nightstand, too intent on getting Kent’s jeans off, annoyed when he had to pull back to tug them down. “Damn thighs --”Kent laughed, reached down to help shove them off, toss them on the floor. He shivered a little when Jeff spread his hands over those thighs, muscled and massive and freckled from summer. After a moment, he let out a soft little breath, abs tightening. “What?”And Jeff had seen Kent naked more times than he could even count, was very familiar with the lines of his torso and curve of his ass, even if he’d never really touched it, but this --“You’re so hot,” Jeff said, staring at him before Kent yanked on his hair, pulling him back down.They were still kissing when Jeff wrapped his fingers around Kent’s cock, smiling a little when Kent sucked in a sharp breath. He’d kind of thought that jerking somebody else off would be… similar to doing it himself, though obviously not the same. But Jeff didn’t really have any experience with someone else’s dick, and apparently, cut dicks were drier. After a second he paused, pulling away to reach for the lube in his nightstand drawer, and Kent pushed up on one elbow.“You can tell me,” Jeff said, shutting the drawer, “what you want me to do, I mean. Or if I’m not doing it right.” He rubbed the lube between his fingers, warming it before he glanced at Kent. “I’m great at taking direction.”Kent flushed from his ears to his chest. “Are you?”“Mmhm.”“And what if I want you to fuck me?” Kent asked, voice soft.Heat flared in his stomach. “I just need, like, thirty minutes, man,” said Jeff, “on account of the whole blowjob situation, but --”Kent kissed him again.
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
“And what if I want you to fuck me?” Kent asked, and Jeff just --Fucking could mean a lot of things. Jeff was aware of that, was aware that technically, they’d just had sex. But what if I want you to fuck me definitely meant, like. Stick your dick in me, Jeff Troy. Right? Which, Jeff was usually all for, it was a fun activity, he just -- he’d never had anal sex before. In all the times he’d picked up, women had only mentioned it maybe twice, and he hadn’t really been up for it? It seemed like kind of a lot of work, especially since Jeff had noticed a wince or two, here and there, from partners regarding his size.And for them to jump right into anal? That was kind of -- Jeff hadn’t expected it. He’d thought they’d work up to it, or something.Still. “I just need, like, thirty minutes, man,” said Jeff, because it was physically impossible for him to get hard again that fast, although if he could’ve? That would have done it. And he probably didn’t need to explain that, but on the off chance he did... “On account of the whole blowjob situation,” he added, “but --”Kent kissed him again. “No problem,” he murmured. “We can do other stuff.”Jeff curled his hand around the back of Kent’s neck, brushing his thumb over soft skin. In the warm light from Jeff’s lamp his hair was a darker gold, and it reminded Jeff of the first year he’d come to Vegas, of the way he always fell asleep against the windows of airplanes. They’d been in bed together a thousand times and never, all at once, and Jeff pulled in a breath, his chest tight. He slid his hand forward to cup Kent’s cheek, rub his thumb over the swell of his cheekbone. Fuck, he loved him.“What?” Kent asked, after a minute.“Nothing,” said Jeff. Everything .Kent grinned a little. “What, are you nervous?” he asked, winding a bit of Jeff’s hair around his index finger, tugging it lightly. “Haven’t you done this like, a thousand times, pretty boy?”“No,” Jeff said, a thrill of heat going through him when Kent called him ‘pretty boy’. He’d never done this .“I mean like, sex in general.”Jeff tossed his head a little, pulling his hair out of Kent’s grasp. “This is different.”The corner of Kent’s mouth quirked into a crooked little smile. He shook his head, reaching for Jeff again, burying fingers in Jeff’s hair.It was easy to tangle himself up in Kent again, to get lost in kissing him.Jeff was half-hard again by the time he reached for the lube, flipped the cap to open it as he settled between Kent’s legs. Kent pushed up onto one elbow, watching him, and Jeff’s cheeks heated. He started with one finger, pausing when Kent’s breath jumped a little. “Is it okay?”“Yeah,” said Kent, “yeah. It’s -- fine. Fuck, sorry, it was cold.”“Sorry,” Jeff said. Damnit. He wanted it to be good , not fine, and he was already messing up. And it wasn’t like fingering a -- Jeff wasn’t sure, exactly, when he should push in more, how fast to go. Like, it was different, and it was hard to believe that Kent was trusting him with something like that. He swallowed, looking down at his hand.“You can use another,” Kent said, finally, and Jeff twisted his wrist a little, leaned over to press a kiss to Kent’s inner thigh as he added a second finger. Kent’s hips rocked up to meet him, push his fingers deeper.The noise Kent made when Jeff curled his fingers inside of him sent a shiver down Jeff’s spine.When the reaction was the same upon further investigation, Jeff sucked in a quick breath. Okay, so he was maybe getting to good. He could work with that.Adding a third finger, Jeff kept his eyes on Kent’s flushed face, trying to be careful and slow because even though Kent was clearly into it, three seemed like a lot. He glanced back down, and fuck, it was hot, Kent’s cock hard and leaking and Jeff’s fingers disappearing into him as he twisted his wrist again, just a little, pressing harder against that one spot that made Kent shudder. Kent took a sharp breath and Jeff stilled immediately, flicking his eyes back up to Kent’s face. “Is this okay?” he asked.“Yeah,” Kent said, a bit breathless. His hand slid up Jeff’s arm, fingers curling around muscle. He shuddered a moment later, and when he spoke again it was almost a whine. “Jeff, Jesus, c’mon. I’m -- just fuck me, please --”“Not yet,” Jeff said, ignoring the twitch of his hips. It wasn’t -- he wanted to get four fingers in before he tried his cock, wanted to make sure Kent was really ready. He didn’t want to mess this up, hurt him somehow. He just needed a little longer. Delaying gratification was a whole thing, anyway, it wasn't like either of them would die if he took just a bit more to get ready.After Jeff was satisfied and Kent had cursed at him at least three more times, it only took a moment to pull back, roll the condom on, slick it with lube, but the air was cold without Kent’s skin against his. Jeff went back to him, stroked a hand down the inside of one thigh as he leaned over. “I --”“Oh my god, Jeffrey,” said Kent, looking up at Jeff’s face, his lips bitten red, “you’re not gonna break me, fuck.”Jeff laughed a little, breathless. “I know. Stop bossing me.”“You like it when I boss y--” Kent bit his lower lip, eyes fluttering shut for a moment as Jeff pushed in. One of his hands grabbed for Jeff’s, pressed against the sheets.Jeff laced their fingers together, bent to let his forehead rest against Kent’s, hair falling around their faces. Kent breathed beneath him and Jeff closed his eyes as he slid in further.Fuck, he was so tight. Jeff let out a shaky breath. He hadn’t done this in way, way too long. He shifted his hips.“Slow,” said Kent, “okay?”As if he could do anything else? Jeff opened his eyes. “Yeah,” he said. “I got you.”Kent tangled fingers into his hair, pushing it back. His eyes shimmered, bright and hot, breath catching a little as Jeff thrust into him again. “Love you,” he said, the words wet against Jeff’s mouth before they kissed again, Jeff winding an arm around Kent’s waist, tucking him that last bit closer.
Love you.
Jeff’s breath hitched. He had always hated the phrase “making love”, had never understood what it meant, was supposed to mean. It had always sounded a little embarrassing, somehow, always given him a cringing feeling, but --But every touch, every breath, everything with Kent was an I love you , always had been, ever since they met. Jeff ran his hand down Kent’s side, gripped the thick muscle of his thigh, and he thought about Kent, about his saying Jeff’s big heart was one of his favorite things about him. Kent, curling up in a tent, high and happy, pressing his face into Jeff’s shoulder as he fell asleep. Jeff thought about Kent’s summer freckles and golden hair and the soft way he looked first thing in the morning and he closed burning eyes, pressed his mouth to the side of Kent’s neck.Kent came first, just barely, shuddering a little and streaking Jeff’s chest once Jeff wrapped a hand around him. He was gorgeous and perfect, head tilted back, hand tight in Jeff’s hair, and when Jeff came it felt punched out of him.He caught his weight with his forearm, just barely avoiding crushing Kent underneath him. Kent’s fingers stayed clenched in Jeff’s hair for a moment, and only once he’d loosened his grip did Jeff pull out of him, move over to collapse against the bed. Everything was warm, heavy, and he felt wrung out, somehow. Gazing up at the ceiling, Jeff tried to slow the heaving of his chest as he stared at the glow-in-the-dark stars. The moisture on his face filtered slowly into Jeff’s consciousness, and he dragged a hand across his eyes.“Oh, Jeffrey,” said Kent, turning onto his side to wind an arm around Jeff’s neck. “I -- it’s okay.”“I know it is,” Jeff said. Why was he crying ? Fuck.“I love you. Hey,” Kent pressed a kiss to his forehead, ran his thumb over Jeff’s cheek to brush away a tear. He said it again, then, in Stoney, voice soft. Their legs wound together, skin against skin.“I love you, too,” Jeff said, and his chest hurt with the warmth of it, the weight.
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
Some of the windows in Kent’s house were loose. It wasn’t a huge deal, but it did mean a higher electric bill, which Jeff’s grandfather had always said was stupid to put up with. It was probably just age, that and Kent just not thinking to check them -- they were gone a lot, after all. Kent’s house was beautiful, but he wouldn’t live in it forever, and traveling during the season coupled with not spending summers there meant it sat empty more than it should. It was easy to fall short on maintenance for a house like that.
Still. After a second night of a chilly draft from the bedroom window, Jeff went back to his apartment to retrieve his toolbox. He could make quick work of a couple of windows, and if the ones in his room were loose, well. There were probably others. That’s what his grandfather would’ve told him, anyway, and so Jeff spent a few minutes wandering around the house, Kevin at his heels, testing window frames.
It turned out that he kind of needed to do a little something to almost all of them. That meant measurements and a trip to the hardware store. If he was quick, maybe he could get them all done that afternoon? He didn’t need long. And Kent wouldn’t mind him doing it rather than calling someone, he was pretty sure. It’s not like he would do a bad job.
Jeff picked up everything he needed from the hardware store and then stopped for beer, too, figuring he’d just spend his afternoon getting things in order. At the house, he flicked on his favorite Pandora station and cracked open a beer, setting it in his room. After tugging his hair up and securing it out of his face, Jeff rolled his sleeves up to the elbow and started on the windows.
Kent got home when Jeff was halfway done with the living room, where he was mostly just checking insulation and fit. His bedroom was done and so was the kitchen, all the windows clean and tight. “Hey, Parser,” Jeff said, after hearing the door shut.
Setting his keys down on the table, Kent cleared his throat. “Hey yourself,” he said, wandering over and picking Jeff’s beer up, reading the label before taking a drink. “Uh. What’re you doing to the house?”
“You got some loose windows,” Jeff said, not taking his eyes off his work. “Thought I’d fix a couple of them. There was a draft in my room.”
“Oh,” said Kent. “I didn’t know they needed to be fixed.”
“Nothing major.” Jeff wiped a windowpane down and prepared to replace the weather stripping. All Kent’s windows had foam, which like -- was fine, it cost less, but it also didn’t last as long and Jeff was pretty sure Kent had never looked at it in his life. Jeff’s grandfather always said vinyl was better, lasted longer. It hadn’t taken Jeff long to get what he needed at the store, anyway, and the expense wasn’t worth mentioning.
Kent leaned on the arm of the sofa, watching him. Jeff glanced back, grinned. “What? You gonna drink all my beer?”
“Maybe,” said Kent.
“Get me another one, then,” said Jeff, turning back to the window. After a minute, when he hadn’t heard Kent move, he looked back over his shoulder. Kent was just kind of… looking at him. Jeff laughed. “Dude. What?”
“Nothing!” Kent’s cheeks flushed pink. Maybe he was getting sick or something.
“You okay?” Jeff asked. A bit of hair slid into his face and he tossed his head a little, trying to flip it back out.
“I’m fine,” said Kent, but the flush crawled a little further down his neck.
“All right, buddy.” Jeff finished the window, humming a little as he slid it shut again.
He was about ready to wash the next one when he realized that Kent still hadn’t moved and his beer was potentially gone. Rude ass.
“Parse,” Jeff said.
“What?” Kent rubbed the back of his neck. “I’m not doing anything! I’m literally just sitting here!”
“But you’re like, watching me,” Jeff complained. “It’s just weather stripping.” He held out a hand. “Gimme the beer. Did you drink it all?”
“No.” Kent handed it over. “Weather stripping. Is that like insulation?”
“Oh my god, bud,” said Jeff. He took a drink. Thinking about it, though, it wasn’t like Kent had a dad growing up to teach him about that stuff. “Yeah. Kind of. It’s sealing around windows and doors and stuff.” He took another drink of the beer. “Saves you money on utilities.”
“Yeah, ‘cause I’m just bleeding dollars on my electric bill,” Kent said, and Jeff rolled his eyes.
“Whatever.”
It didn’t take long to finish the living room. Kent was vaguely helpful, handing Jeff tools when he requested them. Once the living room was done, Jeff headed up the stairs, Kent trailing behind him.
“Aren’t you gonna make dinner?” Jeff asked, pausing in Kent’s bedroom doorway.
“In a little bit I will.” Kent pushed past, sat down on his bed. When Jeff moved to set his beer down on the bedside table, Kent slid a hand up his arm. “Hey.”
“Hey,” said Jeff, looking down. He reached out, brushing his fingers through Kent’s hair. Fuck, he was beautiful. Every day.
“You are so hot,” Kent murmured, eyes lingering on Jeff’s forearms. His hand slid lower, curving around Jeff’s hip. He tilted his head back. “Are you done?”
“No,” Jeff said, because he had three more windows left, hadn’t even started, but Kent’s fingers were already undoing his jeans.
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
Kent looked up at him, ran a hand down the back of his thigh. Fuck, he was good at sucking dick. Jeff shivered, let his head fall back against the mattress.Except that Kent’s hand kept going, and Jeff knew where it was headed, and he wasn’t -- he tensed when Kent’s finger brushed against him, every muscle in his body going rigid. Clenching his eyes shut, Jeff swallowed. Don’t freak out, don’t freak out, don’t frea-- Kent pulled back. “What?”Jeff shook his head. He couldn’t explain this to Kent . He didn’t really understand the problem himself, anyway, but -- well, Kent didn’t really seem like he’d ever worried about, like. Gay stuff. He obviously liked it. He’d had absolutely no problem, whatsoever, asking Jeff to fuck his ass. So, like. Jeff kind of thought that that’s how it would go. Like, permanently. And he hadn’t been wrong about that thusfar.“It’s fine,” said Kent, quickly, “it’s not like, a big deal if you don’t like it. I just assumed that --” he paused, tried again. “I just -- sorry, I should’ve asked, I don’t know what I was thinking.”It wasn’t that Jeff had never thought about it. He’d seen it in porn, obviously. And he clearly -- well, he’d fucked Kent, right. But he’d never like, tried anything on himself. It made his stomach feel weird, thinking about it. Kind of sick. Even when he fantasized about it, which he definitely had done before, it just -- it felt wrong, kind of. Like he wasn’t supposed to be thinking about it. “That’s okay,” he said, and Kent frowned. “Jeffrey,” he said.Jeff pushed up onto one elbow. His hair slid into his face, and he shoved it back with the other hand. It was getting so long he’d have to start putting it up for this. “What?”“Do we need to talk about this?”Well, there was the -- there went the mood. Jeff sucked his lower lip in under his teeth. “I don’t know,” he said, after a minute. “No? I don’t want to. I’m not, like.” He swallowed, shoulders tensing. “You said it wasn’t a big deal.”“That was before you looked like you might throw up when I touched you,” said Kent, and Jeff winced.God, how shitty was that? Who made their boyfriend feel that way? And why was he backing away from sex ? Jeff loved sex. “It’s not like that,” Jeff mumbled, leaning over to reach for his jeans. He didn’t bother pushing his hair back again when it freed itself from behind his ear, falling in front of his face like a curtain. It was kind of nice, knowing Kent couldn’t see his face. “It’s just, like. You know. Like, it’s more --” He tugged his jeans on.“More gay?” Kent asked, voice soft.“No,” said Jeff, defensive, but -- yes. He let out a breath. “I don’t know. It’s not -- it’s not that I don’t want to, I just.” He didn’t know how to explain it.“Don’t want to?” Kent suggested, after a bit of silence. He tucked a bit of Jeff’s hair back behind his ear.“Today,” said Jeff.“Okay,” Kent said. He rubbed the top of Jeff’s thigh with one hand, gentle and warm. “You don’t have to. Sorry.”Jeff didn’t want Kent to apologize, though. That wasn’t it. “I do want to,” he said, after a minute, because he… he did.“It’s really all right,” said Kent. “I don’t want you to like, make yourself do stuff for me. And I’m not like, mad or anything. I just shouldn’t have assumed, I’m sorry.”Assumed? Assumed what ? Jeff frowned. “You know I haven’t like…” he shrugged, not really wanting to say it. Kent knew he’d never fucked a guy. What was there to assume?“Oh, no, I know. I guess I just thought, like,” Kent said. “Y’know. I mean, like.” He shrugged. “Pegging, or whatever --”“Oh my god, no,” said Jeff, before he could stop himself, and his voice came out kind of angry. Kent froze a little before nodding, and fuck. Jeff was a shitty boyfriend.He bet Eric never had this problem. Eric probably knew he was gay his whole goddamn life.“Like I said,” Kent said, tone conciliatory, “it’s fine. And we definitely don’t have to -- ever, if you don’t want, it’s cool with me either way, I --”“Can’t we just, like. Come back to it later?” Jeff asked. “We can do whatever you want,” Kent said. Jeff nodded. “You wanna make dinner?” Kent asked a moment later, pushing up from the bed.“Yeah,” said Jeff, “okay.”He busied himself with his insulin pump and CGM, putting them both back on while Kent hunted for clothes and started to get dressed. Kent didn’t say anything else, but Jeff couldn’t help thinking that he’d probably -- no, definitely -- never had this problem with Eric. Thinking about it, Jeff realized he honestly had no idea which of the two of them usually got fucked and which did the fucking. Like, did they switch around? Was Kent usually the -- had Jeff like, done it wrong? What if Kent preferred it the other way and he was --“What is wrong?” Kent asked.“Nothing!” Jeff tugged a shirt on. Fuck, insecurity was so not his thing. He'd never felt so insane in his life. “I just, like. Did I do it wrong?”Kent frowned, pausing in pulling one of Jeff’s BU shirts on. “What?”“Like, do -- d’you and Eric --” Jeff bit his lip. “I mean. You know, like. Do you like it the other way better and I -- I did it wrong?”“Oh.” Kent reached for him, catching both his hands. “Jeffrey. No. I -- you were -- we’re good. Like, so good.”“But --”“It’s really, really, really not a big deal,” Kent said. “I like either. Both. Whatever.” He squeezed Jeff’s hands. “God, you’re so… why are you so worried about this?”Honestly? No idea. Jeff had never worried so much about sex in his life. “I don’t know,” he said. “Have we totally switched personalities right now?” Kent asked, smiling a little. “Because --”“I just don’t wanna suck for you,” Jeff said, cutting him off. “And before you say anything, I know that’s like, fucking juvenile, but I -- I don’t know, Parse, I just.” He sighed, running his hand through his hair to pull it away from his face. “I want to give you everything you want, all the time, and I’m… scared, I guess, because I don’t know what the fuck I’m doing and I’m fucking it up already and it’s --”Kent leaned down, tucking his fingers under Jeff’s chin to tip his head back. The kiss was hot, hard, and Jeff lost his train of thought.“I have everything I want,” Kent said, resting his forehead against Jeff’s. His stomach growled.“Except dinner,” Jeff said.Kent’s lips curved into that quirky half-smile Jeff liked so much. “Yeah. Except dinner. I was thinking steak.”“Okay.” Jeff stood. He wound an arm around Kent’s waist. “Salt and pepper, a couple of minutes each side, and --”Kent shoved him in the middle, hard enough that Jeff landed on the bed.“I’m finishing them in the oven,” Kent said, grinning before dashing for the kitchen.
|
10583427
|
Lionhearted
|
{
"Archive Warning": "No Archive Warnings Apply",
"Category": "F/M",
"Characters": "Alec Hardy, Ellie Miller (Broadchurch)",
"Fandom": "Broadchurch",
"Language": "English",
"Rating": "Teen And Up Audiences",
"author": "by ellieandhardy",
"chapters": "1/1",
"completed": "",
"published": "2017-04-11T00:00:00",
"words": "978",
"Additional Tags": null,
"Relationship": null,
"Character": null,
"Relationships": "Alec Hardy/Ellie Miller, Alec Hardy & Ellie Miller",
"Series": null,
"Collections": null,
"Fandoms": null,
"Archive Warnings": null,
"Categories": null,
"Bookmarks": null,
"Chapters": null,
"Comments": null,
"Completed": null,
"Hits": null,
"Kudos": null,
"Published": null,
"Words": null,
"Updated": null
}
|
"How does it feel to have solved the case that your ex-husband was responsible for screwing up?"
He looks on at the screen, the words not having as much of an effect on him as Tess' smug face does, and his own face turns into a grimace.
"It feels great, yeah. I'm just so glad that these families can now be at peace."
Daisy is suddenly in frame next to her mother, holding onto her waist and hugging her tightly, and then he was brought back to his own reality, back at the river Sandbrook, holding on to a soaking wet Pippa. Her weight against him doesn't feel as heavy as he remembered; the water on his skin doesn't feel as wet. He places her on the ground, shaking her to see if she would wake up, and then he was brought back (or forward, he can't really tell) to Daisy's bedroom, him shaking Daisy in her bed, Tess looking on, shouting at him, and he crumbles into himself. He shifts position on his bed, on the threshold between his dream state and reality, and his eyelids flutter almost imperceptibly as he falls back in. Only now, he was in the courtroom, awaiting the verdict for Joe Miller.
"Not guilty."
The courtroom erupts into chaos, but before he can process any of it, he hears glass shattering next to him, the dock containing Joe now exposed. He looks to the left as Joe falls forward into the glass shards, the back of his suit turning red with his blood. The two guards that stood with him were now replaced with two other figures with a significant height difference between them. As he gets a closer look, just before they disappear into the door behind them, he recognizes their faces. Jack Marshall and Danny Latimer.He turns back around and sees Ellie curled into a ball, sobbing, Tom, Lucy, and Olly surrounding her. He moves to go to her when he feels his hand being grabbed and he is suddenly out of the courtroom. Claire is leading him away, down the stairs and out the doors to a seething Lee charging toward them. Lee lunges at him, but he doesn't feel the blow come. Instead, he sees Lee on the ground breathing heavily, the wind knocked out of him.In his dreams he could always be this, a version of himself that was stronger than in real life. But in past dreams, it was always apparent that it wasn't real in those times. Now, he isn't so certain. With his new heart he feels invincible, both physically and mentally. The anger he feels is red-hot, boiling over at the seams, making his skin crawl, but he doesn't know the source of it. He thinks it's for everyone he has ever come into contact with in his entire life. With one exception.He's now at the funfair behind his house holding candy floss in one hand and Fred's hand in the other as Ellie and Tom are crashing into each other on the bumper cars. He meets them at the exit of the arena, Ellie holding onto a stuffed lion, because apparently you can 'win' at bumper cars and all winners get a prize, and she hands it to him while she takes Fred's hand from his, Tom taking his candy from the other."For you, 'cause you're lionhearted." She walks away from him leaving him standing in his spot, holding onto the stuffed toy, until the scene around them changes and now they're on a safari, his stuffed lion now real, now walking at the same speed next to their vehicle.He wakes up, but he knows it's still a dream. They're at Ellie's house on her sofa, the dim light from the tv the only thing illuminating the room. She is sprawled on the other end of the sofa, her head cushioned by a pillow, eyes closed. She doesn't look like she is breathing, and he goes to shake her before he catches himself, getting up to turn on the light instead. She stirs, and he goes back to sit on his end of the sofa, keeping his eyes on her.She looks over at him and he feels his heart skip a beat, and he worries that his pacemaker is failing him. He feels lightheaded and dizzy, yet stronger than he's ever been before. The passion he feels is red-hot, simmering to the surface, making his skin feel warm, and he knows exactly the source.He has never moved quicker in his life than when he went to kiss her. Their teeth clash and all of the years that he's been numbing himself come back full force and he feels; he feels like he's never felt anything before.In an instant that feels like forever, she jerks herself away, and the fire that was engulfing his body was now extinguished, his skin cold."What are you doing?" She asks as she stands up and takes several steps away from him.He was now being inundated with ice water, drowning under the intensity while trying to avoid being pulled under, but he fails. In the water, his flesh rots to the bone and he feels himself floating toward the other skeleton already there, a heart pendant clasped around the first two vertebrae....He wakes up in his own bed with sunlight streaming through his window, and takes a moment to himself to process what's going on. Thankfully, most of his dream is forgotten.He looks to his left and sees Tess and Ellie looking at paperwork, tea nearby."What's going on?" They both turn their eyes to look at him, and he notes the differences in their stares."Morning. Cup of tea?" Tess asks him and then struts away.Ellie smiles at him, and that's all he needs.
|
10563831
|
One of Those
|
{
"Archive Warning": "No Archive Warnings Apply",
"Category": "Multi",
"Characters": "Kevin Keller, Joaquin (Riverdale), Betty Cooper, Veronica Lodge, Jughead Jones, Archie Andrews, Cheryl Blossom",
"Fandom": "Riverdale (TV 2017)",
"Language": "English",
"Rating": "General Audiences",
"author": "by CosmoKid",
"chapters": "1/1",
"completed": "",
"published": "2017-04-08T00:00:00",
"words": "1,886",
"Additional Tags": "Alternate Universe - Soulmates, Canon Compliant, Soulmate-Identifying Marks, Asexual Jughead Jones",
"Relationship": null,
"Character": null,
"Relationships": "Joaquin/Kevin Keller, Minor or Background Relationship(s), Betty Cooper/Veronica Lodge, Archie Andrews/Jughead Jones",
"Series": null,
"Collections": null,
"Fandoms": null,
"Archive Warnings": null,
"Categories": null,
"Bookmarks": null,
"Chapters": null,
"Comments": null,
"Completed": null,
"Hits": null,
"Kudos": null,
"Published": null,
"Words": null,
"Updated": null
}
|
Not so tough without your beard, huh?
Kevin’s soulmark had always confused him. Especially when he was younger; he used to fantasize about having a secret admirer and how she’d finally confront him when he shaved and they’d immediately kiss and hug and exchange life stories and other childish fairytales. Granted the shaving thing could be plausible, but he’d realized that the she part of it was impossible when he was eleven and realized that he was definitely into dudes. He was still really confused about the beard part though. It made more sense as he explored being gay, aka combing the internet for knowledge. It was slightly saddening when he found out what a beard meant, he couldn’t ever see himself being so ashamed or scared of his sexuality that he’d hide behind a fake girlfriend. That was ridiculous.So he vowed not to, he came out to his Dad the same night and came out to his school, slightly accidentally, a few weeks later. He made sure everyone was well aware of him being very gay, playing into the cliché a little too well.By the time high school rolled around, he’d completely forgotten about his soulmark, life had gotten in the way. His Mom had left and his best friend was in love with her other best friend even though they didn’t have matching soulmarks and it was all a little too dramatic. He focussed on helping Betty win Archie over despite knowing that they weren’t destined to be. It was easier to focus on a more trivial issue than it was to focus on the overwhelming pain he felt every time he thought of his Mom.He loved Betty and he trusted her, but he didn’t want sympathy about it so he just didn’t speak of it. Betty had enough issues of her own with her parents wanting to be the perfect cereal packet family and whatever Polly and Jason had going on. And she wasn't in the same position as him, no one was apart from Jughead and they weren't exactly close, more friendly acquaintances. And then it all went to hell when Jason drowned and Veronica Lodge rolled into town. He spent the entire summer trying to distract Betty from the mysterious disappearance of her sister by trying to help her win over Archie Andrews just for some raven-haired girl to swoop in and ruin his endgame plans.He supposed they weren’t really endgame, most children didn’t start a conversation with another child by asking them how the onions were wherever they were. They were doomed from the start, but he was a sucker for star-crossed lovers.Of course, Veronica Lodge asking that exact thing the first time she met Betty Cooper had thrown a spanner in the works. His expectation was to spend the next few days helping his friend come to terms with the fact that she was at least a little gay, but then the whole Veronica and Archie thing happened which Kevin was still trying to understand presently and both of the girls seemed pointed to ignore the sexual tension and the fact that they were soulmates. Straight people were weird. Even if they weren’t straight, they were both pretending they were so he felt justified in saying it.And then Veronica kissed Betty during cheer tryouts and Betty had a minor breakdown before deciding she definitely had a crush on Archie still which was a little frustrating, to say the least. And then Cheryl Blossom happened and Kevin decided that he was leaving his best friend to deal with her love life for a while.He needed a break which is why he decided to hook up with Moose, who was definitely not his soulmate, thank god. He doubted Moose even knew what a beard was.But then they’d found a dead body. Jason Blossom’s body, to be specific.It was probably bad that he’d almost been disappointed when he found the body, he just really needed a break and not to find a dead body. But he didn’t suggest they ignore the body and go fuck somewhere else like he might have done if he was a little more intoxicated.And somehow all hell went to more hell as Archie and Betty fell out and Betty and Veronica fell out and then everyone was friends again and Kevin decided that he needed to stop hanging around people who ignored their soulmates in order to be ‘straight’.(Everyone knew that Archie Andrews and Jughead Jones were soulmates apart from Archie. Even Jughead had figured it out despite being very very ace.)For a hot minute there, Betty and Cheryl Blossom were apparently friends which somehow translated into Veronica and Cheryl becoming friends and Kevin was a hundred percent done with drama.For the first time since he was thirteen, he wished to have already met his soulmate. He just wanted someone he could talk to about everything and a small part of him still believed that soulmates couldn’t lie to each other.He didn’t know if it was true or not, but he definitely knew they could lie to themselves about their soulmates. Exhibit A, Betty Cooper; exhibit B, Veronica Lodge and exhibit C, Archie Andrews.And then Cheryl got arrested, sort of. And Veronica was slut-shamed and suddenly they were secret spies on the slut-shaming in the school and then Betty nearly killed a jock and everything was just crashing at the same time. Then the whole Grundy thing began and suddenly Veronica’s Mom was working with the Southside Serpents and everything got worse.It felt like everyone and everything around him was shattering, but he wasn’t. He felt like he was encompassed in a glass box protecting him from the storm, but forced to watch his friends struggle without being able to help. And it was horrible.He couldn’t possibly help Veronica with her Dad being in prison and her Mom being involved with gangbangers. He couldn’t do anything about Betty’s controlling Mom and he couldn’t miraculously find Polly and bring her home. He couldn’t bring Jughead’s sister and Mom back either. And he had no idea what to do with the Archie situation. So he thought that maybe it would be a nice distraction to go and watch a movie at the drive in and he could talk about the newest fashion shows with Veronica if the movie was boring.And then Cheryl Blossom joined them with her manic depressive act which he still didn’t know if it was actually an act or not. With the Southside Serpents in the background as well, the night had gone from fun movie time to being worse than dinner with his very distant and very straight relatives. Uncle George just couldn’t take the hint that Kevin wouldn’t have a girlfriend anytime soon because he was very gay.Apparently, Veronica Lodge had no self-preservation because she decided that the best way to deal with noisy criminals was to threaten them. She threatened criminals because that’s always the best plan of action.He was almost glad to be forced to get a refill. Granted, that was before he knew he was going to be confronted by a gang member, a very cute gang member who just happened to start with “Not so tough without your beard, huh?”It was unbelievably cliché, but his heart stopped. He nearly dropped the popcorn and he just froze. Fuck. He really wasn’t planning on hearing those specific words in that specific order anytime soon.So in his panic, he blurted out the first thing he could think of which probably wasn’t the most appropriate thing.“Ah yes, shaving, infamous for weakening men. I hear it’s what did Napoleon in at the end,” he’d drawled sarcastically, trying to look anywhere other than the guy who may or may not be his soulmate.His first thought after that had been fuck and his second had been shit, I hope that’s not his soulmark. He couldn’t imagine that being the most romantic mark.The guy had frozen as well for a second before he snorted out loud and reached out to grab Kevin's sleeve. He can’t remember much more, he’d blanked out with panic, slight excitement, and just general tiredness, just that somehow he’d ended up making out with the guy against a fence and that the guy was a very good kisser. He’d resurfaced at some point during the make out session that was surprisingly long.“Okay, this time I really have to go,” he found himself saying, but he didn’t move. He stayed there trapped between the guy and the fence. And then he went back to kissing when the guy kissed him again so he clearly didn’t need to go that much although he was operating more on instinct and autopilot at that point.
“I’m Joaquin, by the way.”Okay, that was good. It was good to put a name to a face, especially the possible face of your soulmate. He took a deep breath, feeling a blush creeping up on his face. He had to keep in contact with the guy, even if he wasn’t his soulmate. There weren’t many queer boys in Riverdale and especially not many who were phenomenal kissers. “Give me your phone,” he demanded, probably against his better judgment. Then again, it was probably against his better judgment to make out with a probable gang moment against a fence when his Dad, the sheriff, was around the corner.His fingers scrambled to put in his details when the guy handed it over, his panicked fingers making more mistakes than anyone competent with technology should. “This is my number, use it,” he told Joaquin, not sure why he thought he could order a probable gang member around.“Kevin Ke-” Joaquin’s face fell as he read the name, definitely suggesting that he’s a probable gang member. “As, as in, as in Sheriff Keller?” Yep, definitely a gang member.“That a problem?” He definitely sounded more confident than he felt, his heart was racing and his mind was flooded with panicked and happy and confused and just every other type of emotional thought.Joaquin paused for a second before rolling up his sleeve to show his serpent tattoo, “Is this a problem?” he questioned, but Kevin was distracted.His eyes zoned in the dainty handwriting on Joaquin’s wrist. It was too dark to read the words, but he could make out the shape and the handwriting and it was his handwriting. If he looked close enough, he could see the shape of Napoleon on his wrist.“I won’t tell if you won’t,” he’d blurted out after realizing he’d been staring at the guy’s wrist for approximately too long. He was rewarded with another amazing kiss from Joaquin so it clearly wasn’t the wrong thing to say.He can’t exactly remember how they’d parted ways, but somehow he’d gotten back to Veronica and Cheryl, significantly more disheveled and without the popcorn and drink which raised a few eyebrows, but neither of them said anything which he was grateful for.It was only then when he realized that he and Joaquin had done the exact same thing as Archie and Jughead, and Veronica and Betty.Fuck, he was one of those.
|
10549758
|
In the Dark
|
{
"Archive Warning": "Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings",
"Category": "M/M",
"Characters": "Handsome Jack, Rhys",
"Fandom": null,
"Language": "English",
"Rating": "Explicit",
"author": "by ThirtySixSaveFiles",
"chapters": "1/1",
"completed": "",
"published": "2017-04-05T00:00:00",
"words": "2,553",
"Additional Tags": "Unhealthy Relationships, Manipulative Behavior, jack is a predatory fuckstick, Thighjob, Alpha/Beta/Omega Dynamics, Brief description of violence, but basically just porn",
"Relationship": "Handsome Jack/Rhys (Borderlands)",
"Character": null,
"Relationships": null,
"Series": "Taking What Comes",
"Collections": null,
"Fandoms": "Tales from the Borderlands - Fandom, Borderlands (Video Games)",
"Archive Warnings": null,
"Categories": null,
"Bookmarks": null,
"Chapters": null,
"Comments": null,
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}
|
Jack settles the blindfold around Rhys’ head, and the kid’s fingers creep up to touch it - not to try to take it off, but testing, patting the cloth over his closed eyes as if touch will replace the sense that Jack has has taken away. Jack pulls Rhys’ hand down and plants it on the bed, and when he lets go Rhys leaves it there.Jack sits back and admires his handiwork. Rhys’ breath is already coming a little faster, unused to having to depend on sound and smell alone, but as Jack watches Rhys leans forward a little and inhales through his nose, clearly chasing Jack’s scent. He probably doesn’t even know he’s doing it, and it curls something dark and warm inside Jack’s chest to see Rhys seeking him out for comfort, even unawares.“Doing alright, sweetheart?” Rhys nods hesitantly.“Good,” Jack says, getting up. “Stay there.”He’s tempted to just tie Rhys to the bed and keep him there. An omega coming into their own has a distinctive scent, hormone changes slowly altering their body, and for some alphas that’s a particularly irresistible temptation. Jack certainly can’t deny the draw, but with Rhys it’s not just about the prospect of a fresh omega, wrecked and needy with his first heat.It’s about the way Jack can say stay and know that Rhys will, even as he turns his head to try to track Jack’s movement. It’s about how, to Rhys, Jack appears to be the only thing in the world that matters. That is worth any amount of waiting, and Jack can smell Rhys’ first heat coming. It’s not here yet, but it’s coming.Rhys had asked, diffidently, if Jack could tell how far away his heat was. He’d been staring at the ground, apparently unable to look Jack in the eye, so he had missed the grin that had flashed across Jack’s face before he’d been able to school it into a more neutral expression. Jack had taken great pleasure in pulling Rhys close and thoroughly scenting his neck, and although there was nothing Rhys’ skin could tell Jack that his scent across the room couldn’t, Jack wasn’t about to give up the chance to trace his lips down Rhys’ neck and across the nascent bonding site. The nerves there weren’t fully functional yet, but they were clearly alive enough to make Rhys shudder with new sensation, trembling under Jack’s fingers as he tried to keep himself from pressing closer.It hadn’t occurred to Jack until recently that maybe done his job too well - that Rhys wasn’t afraid of Jack , he was afraid of overstepping . Jack had almost laughed aloud when he had realized that the tension in Rhys’ shoulders following the night he had shaken apart on Jack’s fingers hadn’t been regret but anticipation . Rhys would let him, if Jack said that he wanted he wanted to fuck Rhys right now, Jack is certain of that. But this has always been about Rhys coming to him, and the kid is so close to being out of his mind with need and want, not just willing but begging to take Jack’s knot, and that - that is worth waiting for.There are other things they can do in the meantime.Jack stands next to Rhys’ bed and unzips his trousers. His cock is already showing interest as he draws it out and squeezes gently, and he smiles to himself as Rhys tilts his head, clearly trying to figure out what Jack’s doing. He can see the exact second realization crosses Rhys’ face, and Jack allows himself a groan as pink spreads across Rhys’ cheeks. Rhys licks his lips and that is a tempting thought but it’s not what Jack has in mind.“Lie down, sweetheart. No, on your side,” he corrects as Rhys goes to turn over on his stomach. Rhys hesitates, and Jack can almost smell his confusion, but Rhys settles on his side with his back to Jack, legs curled up and hand clutching the covers.“Now your belt.” Rhys’ hand springs gratifyingly quickly to his belt, and although his hand shakes a little he strips off his belt without hesitation. His hand goes to the fastening of his pants next but he pauses, waiting for instructions, and Jack grins as his dick twitches in his hand.“Go on.” The mattress shifts as Jack settles on the edge of the bed, lazily stroking himself as Rhys wrestles with his pants. He gets them shoved down to mid-thigh and moves to kick them the rest of the way off, but Jack puts a hand on Rhys’ hip and the kid stills instantly.“Leave ‘em.” The pants will help keep Rhys’ thighs together. Jack smooths his hand over one round cheek, spreading Rhys open with his thumb. Rhys shifts, head turning back over his shoulder even though the blindfold keeps him in the dark. His mouth parts on a gasp as Jack slides his thumb over that glistening hole, and when Jack presses his thumb against it - not pressing in , just being present - the helpless sound that escapes his lips is everything Jack could have wanted.It’s almost funny, Jack thinks as he shifts fully onto the bed, the duality this kid is capable of. Jack has seen Rhys in action - hell, he's the one who taught Rhys how to wield a knife. Rhys has a deft hand with a blade and a seeming indifference to danger, allowing him to take apart men bigger and stronger than he is with the kind of aplomb even Jack’s top lieutenants don’t have. Jack’s never seen anything break that quiet concentration, not until Jack calls his name. Then it’s like Rhys surfaces from some deep water, blinking as he refocuses on his surroundings, turning unerringly toward the sound of Jack’s voice. A spray of blood across the face should send any omega shuddering backward, but Rhys doesn’t seem to hardly notice, instead smiling hopefully as he meets Jack’s gaze, waiting for Jack’s approval.The kid’s got a killer’s instincts, which is undoubtedly unique for an omega. But under Jack’s touch he responds to a different set of instincts, ones that have him pressing back into Jack with an impatient noise as Jack settles behind him.“Easy, easy,” Jack soothes, getting an arm underneath the kid and pulling Rhys in until his back is flush with Jack’s chest. He can feel the kid’s heartbeat pounding underneath his palm, feel Rhys’ breath coming short and fast in his lungs. “Breathe, sweetheart.”Rhys tries, gulping in a breath and exhaling slowly. His breath calms as Jack reaches behind himself to the tub of salve on the nightstand, but he jumps when Jack slides slick fingers between his thighs. The kid whimpers as Jack spreads the salve around, fingers sliding over the delicate skin of his inner thighs, and he chokes when Jack slides his fingers all the way up, stroking over the tender skin of his perineum. Jack noses the ties of the blindfold away and presses his lips to the back of Rhys’ neck.“You’re so good for me, Rhys, so good” he murmurs into the kid’s hairline, and Rhys shudders underneath him. “Let me be good to you.”Rhys turns his face into the pillow and moans as Jack slides his cock in between the kid’s thighs. Jack goes slowly at first, letting the kid feel every inch of it drag against his skin, against his balls, against his own rapidly stiffening length. He holds Rhys firmly against his chest with one hand and clamps the kid’s thighs shut with the other; tangled up in his pants as they are, they hadn’t been very far apart, but Rhys gets the hint pretty quickly. Jack muffles his own groan in Rhys’ hair as the kid’s thighs flex around him, creating a warm, slick hole for him to fuck into.Rhys whimpers every time Jack’s dick rubs against the underside of his, hand clenched tight in the bedspread as if to anchor himself. He’s started leaking slick in earnest, now; not as much as he will when his heat finally catches up to him, but enough to dribble down to where Jack’s thrusts can spread it around. He feels warm underneath Jack’s hands - not feverish-hot, not yet - but warm and pliable and perfect .Jack finds himself murmuring into Rhys’ hair, perfect and so good and just for me and other indistinct words of praise as his hips start picking up speed. The warmth and friction coil heat in his gut, still low and pleasant for the moment but gaining strength with every slide of his dick against Rhys’ skin. Jack slides the hand on Rhys’ chest upwards, and Rhys tilts his head back to let Jack’s fingers encircle his neck. Jack’s own breath picks up at that easy acquiescence, and with Rhys’ pulse fluttering under his fingertips it’s easy, so easy, to tighten the barest bit, just enough so Rhys’ panting breath becomes audible over the wet sounds of skin against skin. Jack grinds his hips into the back of Rhys’ thighs, letting the whine of Rhys’ breath and the drag of his skin on Jack’s dick spur him on. Rhys makes a little choked sound and Jack immediately eases off, but Rhys just shoves his hips back, encouraging and needy all at once. Jack lifts his fingers from where they’ve been digging bruises into the kids hip and threads them with Rhys’, lifting the kid’s hand and bringing it down to between his legs.“You’re close, aren’t you, kiddo?” Jack’s voice sounds low and dark even to his own ears, and Rhys nods frantically as Jack closes their hands loosely around Rhys’ twitching cock. “Here, baby, this’ll help.” Rhys moans desperately, hips jerking as he thrusts frantically into the ring their fingers make, and when Jack bites down on the shell of his ear he sobs, coming in jerky spurts over the coverlet.Jack’s close, too, the smell of a satisfied omega making his gut clench and his knot start to grow. It catches a bit on the skin of Rhys’ thighs, tearing little noises out of the kid with each thrust as he fights to recover his breath. Jack closes his eyes and grits his teeth, reminding himself as his hips keep pumping between Rhys’ thighs that he is waiting , that he doesn’t want to push Rhys flat on his stomach and push his swelling knot into the kid - not now, anyway. Not yet . Instead Jack releases Rhys’ fingers and draws his own through the mess on the coverlet, bringing them up to Rhys’ mouth. The kid opens obediently as soon as Jack’s fingers trace his lips, taking Jack’s fingers into his mouth and sucking desperately. Jack groans, burying his face in Rhys’ hair as the kid’s tongue traces warm and wet over Jack’s fingers, cleaning Rhys’ own release off of them. Jack’s hips stutter one last time and Rhys makes a muffled noise around his fingers as Jack’s dick jerks between Rhys’ thighs, wedging his knot just below the curve of Rhys’ ass and releasing hot and wet over the front of his thighs. Rhys continues to make muffled noises and Jack realizes the kid is trying to say something, so he draws his fingers back out and rests them on Rhys’ hip.“Please, please, Jack .” Rhys is practically sobbing into the pillow. “ Please fuck me , I want it, I want you to -” Jack growls into the kid’s neck as his dick twitches - it’s too soon for him to be ready again, his knot is too big, but he could be soon if he just stayed here with Rhys pushing back frantically against him, breathing in those pheromones laced with the barest trace of an omega in heat. He could push Rhys flat on his stomach and fuck right into him and Rhys would scream for it, pinned under Jack’s weight and unable to move. He’d be tight, so tight, on that edge of not-quite-ready as he is, and Jack is sorely tempted, fingers digging into Rhys’ hip, but -“Not tonight, kiddo.” Jack brushes his lips over the back of Rhys’ neck, pushing back his own impatience. The kid shivers underneath him, squeezing his thighs around Jack’s knot and Jack grits his teeth. “You’re not ready for that.”Rhys shifts away a bit, pushing up on his arm and turning over to face Jack. Jack growls a bit at the loss of pressure around his knot but Rhys is shoving the blindfold up, squinting against the sudden brightness, to meet Jack’s eyes. There is the faintest hint of wetness about his lashes but his mouth is set determinedly.“I am ready,” he insists. “I’m ready, I am, I want this, I want - “ He bites his lip and Jack’s almost sure that the end of that sentence was I want you. That alone nearly erodes what’s left of Jack’s restraint - Jack’s knot is still high but Rhys is asking , he could take it, he could almost certainly learn to take it - but there’s a place beyond this, where Rhys’ heat has undone what shyness he has left, and that’s where Jack wants to have Rhys squirming on his dick for the first time, panting and unselfconscious and utterly, utterly Jack’s.So instead he leans down and brushes his lips over Rhys’, biting down on the bottom lip where Rhys’ own teeth had dug in a second ago. That earns him a desperate groan, and the kid turns into him, pressing along Jack’s front. His legs are still caught in his pants and Rhys wiggles for a moment, finally kicking them off and tangling his legs with Jack’s. His fingers trace Jack’s swollen knot carefully, and Jack has to bite his tongue on the noise he makes at the shy touch of those unpracticed fingers.“That’s a convincing argument, kiddo,” Jack says, low and breathy, and Rhys looks up hopefully. “But the answer is still no.” Rhys’ face falls and Jack chuckles, gathering him in close. Rhys burrows into his arms, tucking his head under Jack’s chin, rubbing his cheek along Jack’s collarbone. Jack lets him, tracing his fingers idly up and down the back of Rhys’ neck. He lets Rhys lie there, a boneless weight against Jack’s front, until his knot goes down enough that it’s comfortable to move again.Then he disentangles himself, ignoring Rhys’ faint noise of protest, and rights his clothing. When he shifts off the bed Rhys sits up as if to follow him, but Jack shushes him and tucks him into bed, smiling as Rhys slides reluctantly under the covers. It’s not that Jack wouldn’t be happy to spend the night with an eager young omega wrapped around him - but he wants to keep the kid on the edge of anticipation, and that means returning to his own room when they’re done here. When Rhys’ heat finally arrives, Jack fully intends to lock the both of them inside his bedroom - but that, like Rhys’ first knotting, will have to wait, both an incentive and a reward for Jack’s patience.Jack brushes his lips over the top of Rhys’ head and breathes in for a second. He smiles to himself.Any day now. He won’t have to wait much longer.
|
10546120
|
The Pickles
|
{
"Archive Warning": "Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings",
"Category": "M/M",
"Characters": "Okumura Rin, Okumura Yukio, Pickle",
"Fandom": "Ao no Exorcist | Blue Exorcist",
"Language": "English",
"Rating": "Explicit",
"author": "by CreativeDestruction",
"chapters": "1/1",
"completed": "",
"published": "2017-04-05T00:00:00",
"words": "871",
"Additional Tags": "Maybe Demon Senses can be our always, By far the shitest things I have ever written, I Tried, I hate myself, Pickles - Freeform, A Barrel - Freeform, Sex in a barrel, Clearly one of the weirdst things I have ever written, It fits the theme of the series so, This is going to be reported I swear, Incest, Im sinning again tonight, I thought of this while walking in Times Square WTF, gay af, Boy Kissing, (In a barrel), im so sorry, Poor Life Choices, Cancer honestly, Gay Bro's",
"Relationship": "Okumura Rin/Okumura Yukio",
"Character": null,
"Relationships": null,
"Series": "Rin X Yukio Food Porn",
"Collections": null,
"Fandoms": null,
"Archive Warnings": null,
"Categories": null,
"Bookmarks": null,
"Chapters": null,
"Comments": null,
"Completed": null,
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"Published": null,
"Words": null,
"Updated": null
}
|
The Pickles- Rin X Yukio
Nobody asked why Rin was sitting in a barrel.
Not even Yukio who was currently sitting in front of Rin’s barrel even bothered to ask why. Rin’s head was sticking out of the lid of the barrel, making it impossible to see what was in the barrel.
Yukio however knew that his partner was probably sitting in some kind of food.
This kind of thing happened a lot actually hense just another reason that the younger Okumura twin didn’t ask about it. It happened once before and then another time that he initiated himself, leading to a whirlwind of disasters that could not be forgotten. The last time was the last time that Yukio said he would participate in those kind of things.
But after a few minutes of staring at the dark haired guy in front of him in question he did what he said he wouldn’t do.
He asked why, “Rin? Why are you sitting in a barrel?”
“YUKIO! I THOUGHT YOU’D NEVER ASK!” The rambunctious teen smiled and sat in his barrel.
“Well I'm asking Rin.” Yukio sighed and sat in front of the barrel that was conveniently placed in the living room of the shared dormitory.
“You see I was wondering what other foods would be beneficial to my bizarre existence and I read somewhere that if you still in a barrel of pickles that your skin will glow.” Rin explained shifting in his barrel.
“What your trying to tell me is that you're sitting in a barrel of pickles.”
“Yes.”
Yukio shook his head determined that get his brother out of the goddamn wooden barrel. “In no way is this beneficial to anything.”
Rin smirked and moved again in the thing to grab a pickle and bring it to his mouth as Yukio continued to mutter smart bullshit. “Listen here Yuki baby I know that this is fine and it will help my demon senses.”
Yukio looked over his glasses, “Demon senses?”
“Demon senses.” Rin confirmed chewing the green pickled cucumber.
“But it’s just vinegar.” The younger of the two was stunned and concerned and told himself to get Rin a food therapist because this was getting out of hand.
“You know what else is like a pickle?” Rin asked grabbing yet another pickle from the barrel he sat in.
“Please don’t start this.” Yukio pleaded, but then the barrel Rin was in started to glow and then grow a bit larger. Yukio wanted to die, it was the perfect size to fit another human. Rin motioned for Yukio to sit in the barrel that was attached to his barrel with a weird bright smile.
Yukio could have denied everything but honestly if there was double barrel filled with your brother/boyfriend and pickles and vinegar in your living room what the fuck would you not want to try to sit in it.
Yukio sat in the pickles.
It was different it was like tons of small toes all around him. Yukio still didn’t think that sitting in pickles was sexy or that it would help anything.
Boi was he wrong.
He could feel Rin’s hands shifting around trying to find another pickles even though there was multiple pickles in the barrels. Rin was just trying to find the biggest pickle.
From the outside of the barrel everything was normal or appeared to be except for the fact that there was a barrel in the living room which a weird but the weirdest messed up shit was happening inside the barrel.
Yukio was just convinced that the other was always looking for ways to spice up their life, this was just a strange fucking way to do it, but it felt good so there was no issues here.
Rin was currently trying to get Yukio’s pants off inside of a barrel that might look big on the outside but wasn’t from the inside, which was completely opposite of Yukio, Rin thought.
Anywho, the vinegar from the pickle juice was all tingly making for an extra sensation that was surprisingly nice, but better if the younger just closed his eyes and forgot that the he and his other half were doing it in a barrel in there living room, it was better that way. Or in other words not a turn off.
The pickles were shifting all around the two in the barrel and one of two were casually eaten as they went at it. Luckily nobody stopped but because if they did they would’ve seen a shaking barrel and probably wouldn’t want to know what was going on inside.
In the end there was probably about two or three different rounds of this and Yukio was in a state of wanting to kill Rin or snog his face senseless. What a weird afternoon.
“This is never happening again.” Rin concluded and fell asleep in the barrel, he was sure that most of the vinegar leaked out of the barrel and the pickles had been eaten.
“No promises.” Rin was drunk af on pickles.
What they learned that afternoon was that a barrel and some pickles were THE ABSOLUTELY WORST FUCKING PLACE TO DO ANYTHING.
Thank you.
"Bitch, what the fuck?"- Armani
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Tma zastyvshaia v
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{
"Archive Warning": "Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings",
"Category": null,
"Characters": "Alistair (Dragon Age), Morrigan (Dragon Age), Leliana (Dragon Age), Ser Jory, and others - Character",
"Fandom": "Dragon Age: Origins",
"Language": "Русский",
"Rating": "Teen And Up Audiences",
"author": "by orphan_account",
"chapters": "2/?",
"completed": "",
"published": "2017-04-07T00:00:00",
"words": "2,251",
"Additional Tags": "Detectives, Drama, Modern Thedas, AU",
"Relationship": null,
"Character": null,
"Relationships": null,
"Series": null,
"Collections": null,
"Fandoms": null,
"Archive Warnings": null,
"Categories": "F/M, Gen",
"Bookmarks": null,
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Мягкая улыбка каждый раз появляется на её губах, когда она смотрит на него. Кайлану стыдно и он давится отвращением к самому себе, но берёт её за руку, кладёт в свой карман - так теплее. Она говорит, что провожать её вовсе необязательно, особенно, когда на улицах так небезопасно. Он должен и сам понимать, что рисковать своей жизнью ради простой прогулки более чем необдуманно и глупо, когда страна, любимым принцем которой он является, находится под угрозой нападения. Кайлан морщится и просит не упоминать об этом, пока они вместе. Ответственность, грозящая свалиться на его плечи, душит и сковывает, и он иногда малодушно готов отказаться от трона ради нескольких минут покоя и отдыха.
Анора понятлива и добра к нему, не настаивает на разговоре. Она такая же заложница обстоятельств, как и он, и Кайлан не может осуждать её. Такого права нет ни у кого. Особенно, у него: он видит, как она старается помочь ему.Временами он думает, не играет ли она в любовь, учитывая, что их помолвка и предстоящая женитьба - расчёт и договор. Но она всегда рядом, не отказывает ни в чём, и он корит себя за то, что осмеливается сомневаться в её искренности. В конце концов, они знакомы с детства, и их отцы закрепили свою дружбу ещё со времён борьбы с орлейской экспансией. Анора, ещё будучи девчонкой, заявляла, что всегда останется верной государству, и Кайлан знал, что лучшей кандидатуры на роль королевы ему не найти. Умная, преданная и верная женщина, которая всегда подставит плечо в трудную минуту.Не стоило писать те письма.Он тяжело вздыхает. Мысли о работе и обязанностях не оставляют его ни на секунду и во время прогулки с невестой. Даже она - работа, которую он должен выполнить безукоризненно. Анора смотрит на него с беспокойством, сжимает руку чуть крепче. Она говорит, что он справится, по крайней мере, она бы не выбрала его, будь он не способным навести порядок в собственном доме. Кайлан смеётся и просто смотрит на неё.Он чувствует себя жестоким, чаще ничтожным, но фальшивым – постоянно. Носит маску балагура и весельчака, смельчака и храбреца, и это очаровывает людей. С телевизора Кайлан Тейрин обещает освободить город от коррупционной сети, хотя сам завяз там с головой. Говорит, что уровень преступности обязательно снизится, но лезть в это болото себе дороже. Заверяет, что война больше никогда не вернётся на земли Ферелдена, но договоры грозят обрушиться карточным домиком. Когда-то он смотрел на отца, восхищаясь им и мечтая пойти по его стопам, стать воплощением справедливости и порядка, но с возрастом детская наивность оставила голову Кайлана. Реальность оказалась далека от сказок про рыцаря в золотых доспехах, смело рвущегося в бой и сокрушающего дракона. Увы, кого-то нужно подкупить, кого-то задобрить, с кем-то заключить сделку, на чьей-то дочери жениться. Анора, в отличие от всех, видит его настоящего, без бутафории и масок. С ней ему не нужно притворяться, что всё хорошо, потому что она знает об истинном порядке вещей и какова цена власти.Кайлан обнимает её, когда они подходят к дому Мак-Тиров, кладёт голову на плечо, ссутулившись. Она гладит его по спине, и он чувствует усмешку в её словах, когда Анора говорит, что он тяжёлый. Он и сам улыбается, но ему больно и грустно. В его сердце другая женщина, с которой он быть никогда не сможет. Орлесианка, что носит маску и владеет империей.Он пишет ей письма, которые не отправляет.Анора предлагает ему зайти на чай, но Кайлан не хочет лишний раз видеться с её отцом, поэтому мотает головой, отказываясь, и прижимается губами к щеке, царапая щетиной. Она склоняет голову набок, гладит по щеке. Повторяет, что всё наладится, и возвращается домой.
Ему так хочется верить в её слова.Кайлан стоит ещё немного перед закрытой дверью, смотрит на загорающиеся окна, в одном из них мелькает силуэт. Анора раздвигает шторы и замечает его. Махает рукой. Он улыбается, разворачивается и идёт к себе. Ему хочется немного прогуляться, хотя он всё равно звонит своему водителю и просит быть через минут десять в двух кварталах от дома Мак-Тиров.Десяти минут вполне достаточно, чтобы получить выстрел в спину на улице Каленхада.
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
Алистер и не думает курить, но сейчас ему отчего-то нестерпимо хочется, несмотря на першение в горле. Простуда, что он подхватил из-за недосыпа и переутомления, не даёт дышать полной грудью, осела насморком, звенит в ушах головной болью. Шум машин доносится с темнеющих улиц – негерметичные старые окна в офисе, прикрытые жалюзи. Жёлтый свет фонарей разрезает полосками пол, рассекает кожаные ботинки застывшего в кабинете мужчины, падает на тяжёлую столешницу. Алистер медленно подходит к столу, проводит рукой, собирая пыль на подушечки пальцев, отодвигает кресло и садится в него. Закидывает голову назад и прикрывает глаза. Он понимает, что случившееся не его вина, но сомнения всё равно терзают. Сбившиеся в клубок из «если», они разрастаются с каждой секундой, поглощая его, заполняя собой пустоту, образовавшуюся после смерти Дункана. Осознание, что теперь он один, никому не нужный, никем непринятый, отвергнутый, лишило сна, заставляя бесцельно вглядываться в потолок ночами напролёт, словно там есть ответы. И кошмары приходят каждый раз, стоит ему ослабить оборону и позволить усталости настичь его. Алистер так и не определился, что лучше: бессонница или прошлое.В последнее время он не ночует дома, в своей квартире, остаётся в этом офисе, на диване в приёмной, ослабляя галстук на шее, считая по мелькающему от фар свету проезжающие мимо машины. Ранним утром выползает из своего убежища, пока ещё не рассвело, бродит по улицам, словно пьянчуга, скрыв помятую рубашку за пальто. Когда он поднимается в квартиру, за окном светлеет; красное, но больше не греющее солнце вычерчивают линию горизонта, отбрасывая тьму в прошлое. Алистер скидывает вещи на ходу и отправляется в душ, после вытаскивает из шкафа ещё одну рубашку, подбирает брюки и пиджак с пола, где их и бросил, и уходит на работу.Он ни с кем не общается, сидит днями на своём стуле, изображает деятельность. Алистер не знает, как вернуться назад, как снова стать собой. Ему действительно хочется, он пресыщен саморазрушением, в которое проваливается, словно в яму. Он и не предполагал, что смерть Дункана опустошит его. Он и не догадывался, как много места в его жизни занимает наставник. Он не был готов.Но разве к такому можно подготовиться?Он помнит, что почти сразу же сбросил звонок Дункана, отмахнулся обещанием перезвонить позже, выслушивая гневную речь начальника их отдела по особо тяжким преступлениям. Разбор полётов длился около двух часов, затянувшись, в основном, благодаря детективу Уордену, решившему, что его опыт позволяет ему вести себя наглее, чем стоило бы. Он чувствовал своё преимущество и слегка вышел за рамки, пытаясь доказать свою правоту, всё равно, что бился о стену головой, прослыл выскочкой и получил многообещающий взгляд. И пока он пытался доказать что-то тем, кому не было никакого до него дела, Дункана убивали с изощрённой жестокостью. Алистер не сразу вспомнил о своём обещании, и когда перезвонил, ответила ему женщина. Холодно назвала адрес, попросила явиться на опознание. Он подумал, что это самая дерьмовая шутка из всех, что он слышал.Этот день отпечатался в памяти так, словно он вырезал его на своей коже, записал поминутно, подробно, чтобы не забыть. Словно со стороны, он наблюдал за собой и за окружающими, отстранённо воспринимая происходящее. Кто-то сказал, что он держится молодцом, хлопнул по плечу. Осознание накрыло позже. Когда гром, словно бой барабанов, всколыхнул воздух, ударил под дых и дождь разразился на похоронах Дункана Уордена. Алистер внезапно оглох, всё вокруг утихло, замерло, люди расходились, прячась от дождя, и он стоял так один, возле мраморного серого надгробия с выбитыми именем, датами рождения и смерти. Всё, что осталось от человека, неоднократно спасшего его жизнь.
Комок подскочил к глотке, Уорден словно забыл, как дышать, задыхался, не мог сглотнуть слюну, в панике ухватился за горло, сердце стучало так громко, отбивалось в виски быстрым ритмом, будто вот-вот остановится. Словно он сейчас тоже умрёт на месте.Кто-то взял его за руки. Властно приказал дышать. Кажется, это была женщина, с жёлтыми, словно у кошки или змеи, глазами. Алистер вглядывался в них, пытаясь определить , не цветные ли это линзы, и такая глупость отвлекла его.Она исчезла так же незаметно, как и появилась, оставив его наедине со своим горем. Он упал на колени, пачкая брюки, разрыдался, словно маленький ребёнок. Впивался пальцами в землю, будто собирался выкопать гроб, отодрать крышку и встряхнуть покойника так, чтобы тот прекратил притворяться, чтобы вернулся к жизни. Пожалуйста. Алистер кричал, хрипел, давился слезами и соплями, мок под дождём, и злился, больше на себя, чем на Дункана.Дело об убийстве ему не доверили, отправили в отпуск, посоветовали отсидеться несколько дней, прийти в себя. Алистер понял, что расплата за его дерзость наступила достаточно быстро: с такой же скоростью они закрыли расследование, повесив ответственность за смерть Дункана на сопливого смазливого мальчишку. Уорден впервые осознал тогда, насколько он действительно мал и беспомощен. Как мало усилий и ресурсов нужно приложить, чтобы заткнуть его, тявкающую шавку. Клокочущий смех, почти беззвучный, вырывался из его горла, пока он держал потяжелевшую голову на руках. Глупую, чугунную голову.Алистер тяжело выдыхает и поднимается с кресла, знакомо скрипнувшего. Аренда закончилась, а держать пустой офис детектив Уорден не может себе позволить. Ему ничего не остаётся, как уйти отсюда, оставив воспоминания и боль в этом месте. Он задерживается на мгновение, чтобы ещё раз окинуть взглядом кабинет, в котором всегда сидел Дункан, нахмуренный и суровый.Поджав губы, Уорден выходит из кабинета, прикрывает за собой дверь, по привычке осторожно, аккуратно нажимая на изогнутую ручку. Столик секретаря пуст. Уже второй месяц, кажется. Столько же Алистер скрывается здесь от реальности, которая наваливается на него в его квартире-студии. Ему кажется, что всё как в старые времена, когда в погоне за преступником, которого не могла поймать доблестная полиция, он ночевал в офисе, помогая Дункану. Пока тот однажды не заявил, что Алистеру пора прекратить отлынивать и стоило бы продемонстрировать, каким должен быть блюститель чести и порядка.Теперь Алистеру хотелось плеваться от отвращения к себе и своему выбору.
Он зазнался, он поплатился.Слишком дорого.Дверные колокольчики с перезвоном обещают счастье, но Алистер им не верит и закрывает за собой офис, с тоской выкинутой собаки глядя на окна кабинета. Вот и всё. Он поднимает воротник своего пальто и горбится, сжимая стучащие от холода зубы. В Денериме в декабре всегда чертовски холодно, впрочем, как и во всём Ферелдене. Страна собачников, вот и холод собачий.Алистер не оправдывает стереотип о среднестатистическом жителе своей страны, у него нет пса, и потому в магазинчике перед домом он спокойно проходит мимо стойки с кормом для собак, хватает жестяную банку пива, не глядя, какой-то полуфабрикат, и, задумчиво застыв около стенда с сигаретными пачками, выхватывает одну, не сразу определившись. Последний раз он курил ещё в пансионе для мальчиков, прячась во дворе с другими ребятами. Унюхавшие всё учителя надолго в буквальном смысле отбили желание казаться взрослее. На кассе продавщица адресует ему слегка удивлённый взгляд, но ничего не говорит, кроме слов благодарности за покупку. В конце концов, это не её дело.Уорден выходит из магазина и сталкивается с псиной, внимательно смотрящей на него. Алистер задумчиво оглядывает собаку, крупная, грязная, и, очевидно, не страдает от голода. Быть может, не так давно выбросили на улицу. Он больше не обращает на неё внимания, распаковывает сигареты и вытаскивает одну. Прикуривает, заходится кашлем. Ругается и оглядывается, чтобы удостовериться, что ни одна живая душа не увидела его позор. Пёс подозрительно гавкает, словно смеётся, и Алистер щурится, оглядывается на собаку. Спрашивает, какого чёрта она ещё здесь, но пёс молчит, поглядывает, любопытствуя. Уорден равнодушно делает ещё одну затяжку, и из глотки рвётся кашель, который он старается сдержать. Слёзы лезут на глаза, но Алистер терпит и уходит дальше от магазина.
Пёс семенит за ним, но увлечённый процессом Уорден не замечает этого; только когда окурок оказывается в урне, он вновь встречается взглядом с собакой.Пёс гавкает. Виляет хвостом.Алистер говорит твёрдое нет. Договор аренды не запрещает ему заводить домашних животных, но он и о себе-то не может позаботиться, что говорить о существе, что достаёт ему до середины бедра.
Он ловко открывает дверь, и пробирается так, чтобы собака не пролезла за ним, поднимается на свой этаж, впервые за долгое время возвращается домой, чтобы переночевать здесь. Квартира встречает его темнотой и прохладой. Уорден бросает ключи на кухонный стол, перекидывает пальто через спинку стула.
Неуютно. Непривычно и одиноко. Если бы кто-то попросил его назвать три места, которые ему ненавистны, он бы несомненно среди других назвал бы и эту квартиру. Её необжитость заставляет Уордена чувствовать себя ещё более тоскливо.Он садится на диван, взгляд натыкается на стоящие не распакованными коробки с его пожитками: не так уж их и много, похвастать особо нечем. Там остались лежать книги, скромный набор посуды и дополнительный комплект постельного белья и полотенец, несколько вещей, и под ними, на дне, коробочка с орденами, которыми он не хвалится.
Он прошёл войну, в которой Ферелден остался проигравшей стороной. Но даже если бы они одержали победу, гордиться всё равно было бы нечем.Алистер открывает со щелчком банку пива и решает, что нет ничего плохого, чтобы смыть этот вечер в унитазе деградации. Он включает телевизор, так и не переодевшись, только лениво стянув носки большим пальцем ног, скучающе перещёлкивает каналы, на которых не идёт ничего интересного. Новости он умышленно переключает. В последнее время его тошнит от СМИ и бульварных газетёнок с кричащими заголовками. В какой-то момент он останавливается на передаче про новые технические изобретения и тупо пялится в экран.Внезапная мысль заставляет его отвлечься.
Он подрывается с дивана, натягивает ботинки на босые ноги и спускается на первый этаж. Выходит из многоэтажки. Пёс всё ещё здесь.
Стоит и смотрит.Алистер удивлён. Он фыркает, качает головой, усмехается. Собака не двигается с места, словно ждёт его разрешения. Уорден не знает зачем, но он кивает, открывает дверь и придерживает её, позволяя псу войти внутрь. Пока собака загипнотизирована светящимся экраном, Уорден пытается понять, что ему делать теперь. Он взъерошивает волосы и набирает ванну. Для начала следовало бы хотя бы вымыть пса. Он не знает кличку собаки, поэтому экает ей, надеясь, что хоть на звук она отзовётся.Почему-то теперь в квартире немного уютнее и Алистеру кажется, что пустота немного отступает.
|
10578072
|
FlintWood - Drabbles
|
{
"Archive Warning": "No Archive Warnings Apply",
"Category": "M/M",
"Characters": "Oliver Wood, Marcus Flint",
"Fandom": "Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling",
"Language": "English",
"Rating": "Mature",
"author": "by july_v",
"chapters": "1/1",
"completed": "",
"published": "2017-04-09T00:00:00",
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Title: Got up with the wrong foot? - Excuse me but that’s my tie you’re wearingWith a small swipe of his tongue across the chaser’s bottom lip that earned him a soft growl, Oliver pulled Marcus closer to himself. Wrapped in his fist was a red-golden tie that was all too familiar to him.“That’s a nice tie you’re wearing, Flint.” He paused to nibble on Marcus’ jaw and closed his eyes. “It just horribly clashes with that uniform of yours…maybe you should take those robes off…”His free hand slid up Marcus’ chest and ran along the seam of his robes, until a hand firmly grasped his wrist. The grip was almost painful and Oliver narrowed his eyes a bit, a reaction that obviously pleased his companion.“I could just take off the tie, you know? It would be easier…and faster…” Marcus replied and let go of Oliver’s hand, moving to take off the red-golden length of fabric that adorned his neck.“Don’t you dare…” Oliver half-hissed but he didn’t dare to actually stop Flint. Marcus wouldn’t have let him anyway, he knew that. It still came as a surprise when Flint spun him around and pushed him face first against the wall.“Just shut up…” Marcus breathed into his ear and only a second later Oliver found his hands tied behind his back, wrists held together by his tie. Title: BlowjobHe had never pictured himself on his knees in front of Flint.If he had a choice, to change this scene however he wanted, he wouldn't be there with his bare knees on the cold dungeon floor, with Flint's shaking hands pulling at his hair or the Slytherin's strangled moans as background noise. No, if Oliver were the one to construct the scene then his neck and chest wouldn't be covered in bruises and bite marks and the man in front of him certainly wouldn't be Flint of all people.And yet, Oliver is more turned on than ever before. Title: Busted!Oliver's heart is hammering in his chest, so fast he can hear his blood in his ears. His body is hot and flushed red; a mix of embarrassment and excitement. His hand is still wrapped around his cock, but it's not moving anymore.He's staring wide-eyed and guiltily at Flint, who's drinking in the sight of Oliver; naked on his bed, jerking himself off."Busted!" Flint says, his voice low and dangerous, sending a chill down Oliver's spine. Oliver knows he will be punished. He wasn't supposed to touch himself while Flint was away.He's looking forward to the punishment. Title: Quidditch World CupIt's not really exactly a date.
Merlin help him, Flint would have a fit if he knew that Oliver had even thought about him and the word date in one and the same sentence. It's the Quidditch World Cup and Marcus had suggested they should meet up and go together, share a tent... A date would be romantic and sweet and that meant this wasn't a date.
Oliver was excited nonetheless, his three favourite things together; Marcus and Quidditch and sex with Marcus. Definitely something he'd pick over a date any day.
But maybe it is a date after all. Title: Green and GoldThe combination looks strange on Wood's skin; green silk tie around his left wrist and a golden one around his right.
Yet Marcus can't imagine anything more beautiful than Wood beneath him, tied securely to Marcus' bed. It's not to keep him from running. Wood wouldn't dare and he doesn't want to, anyway.
Marcus likes to think he does it to piss Wood off and it works all the time, he gets so nicely riled up when he can't touch him and Flint does his best to avoid touching all the places that need touching.
Just to piss Wood off. Title: Turn Your BackMarcus never turned his back to enemies, never trusted anyone more than he had to. He was always ready for a fight, fingers close to his wand or hands balled into fists to throw the first punch if someone got too close to him.Oliver on the other hand was quite the opposite. He had no problem making friends, had no problem trusting them, not even Marcus. Oliver wasn’t afraid to let Marcus get close to him.And he had no problem turning his back on Marcus and walking away from him when he felt betrayed, without another word. Title: Silver and RedMarcus gave Oliver a ring; a silver snake that curled around Oliver's finger, as possessive as its former owner. Marcus kissed the ring, feeling Oliver's hand tremble.
It took Oliver some time to find the perfect way to make his claim to Marcus visible.Oliver gave Marcus a ring; a fiery red band that screamed possession louder than words ever could. He traced the ring with his tongue, tasting tiny droplets of blood and drawing a moan from Marcus.
It took Marcus a while to figure out the significance of the red bite mark Oliver had left on his thigh. Title: AzkabanIt's the only place Marcus was ever scared of and the image of his face when the men came to take him there still haunts Oliver. The horror in his lover's eyes, the silent plea for help and the fear of losing Oliver.Oliver had threatened him, in hopes of saving Marcus, but his 'If you go to Azkaban, don't expect me to come see you.' hadn't helped.Marcus looks awful on the other side of the bars; dirty, unshaved, tired and skinny... but oh so relieved to see Oliver. Title: Dirty TalkHe's wide awake, but Marcus isn't moving.
His eyes are shut and he's not moving, but his quick breathing gives him away.Oliver doesn't care. The words keep falling from his lips to Marcus' ears and from there they go right to his crotch. He's lying on his stomach on the bed, with Oliver straddling him, breathing hotly against his neck.Marcus can't remember that mere words had ever made him so achingly hard before. But Oliver is just as aroused, Marcus can feel his cock against his ass.
"Will you fuck me, Marcus? Will you fuck me hard?" Title: Seriously?!"Seriously?!" Oliver can see the amused look on Marcus' face, even if the other tries to hide it. "Seriously, Wood?" Oliver narrows his eyes. He doesn't think it's funny, Oliver thinks it's embarrassing.Marcus eyes him, head to toe and Oliver thinks he can see approval flash through Marcus' eyes. "You'd make a handsome Slytherin, Wood."Oliver is dressed in Flint's old school uniform, head to toe in green, silver and black. It's alien and yet familiar at the same time.Marcus wraps the tie around his hand and pulls Oliver close. "You're hot, Wood..." A pause. "Now get naked!"
|
10558710
|
studies in apathy
|
{
"Archive Warning": "No Archive Warnings Apply",
"Category": "F/M",
"Characters": "Female Jedi Exile, Atton \"Jaq\" Rand",
"Fandom": null,
"Language": "English",
"Rating": "Teen And Up Audiences",
"author": "by adoghurtling",
"chapters": "3/?",
"completed": "",
"published": "2017-04-07T00:00:00",
"words": "2,894",
"Additional Tags": "Angst",
"Relationship": "The Jedi Exile/Atton \"Jaq\" Rand",
"Character": null,
"Relationships": null,
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"Collections": null,
"Fandoms": "Star Wars - All Media Types, Star Wars Legends: Legacy Era - All Media Types, Star Wars Legends: Knights of the Old Republic II: The Sith Lords",
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She watches him go, ‘saber in hand, stalking through the wet Dxun grass. And maybe it’s the Force, or just her own heart, that pulls the word from her—his name, a spear, hurtling through the air.“Atton!”He stops. Turns. His lips twitch, curling at the corners, and suddenly, he’s grinning—lopsidedly, crookedly, like he’s not about to lead half their crew into an ancient Sith temple. Fear gnaws at her, clean through. “Don’t tell me you’ve changed your mind.”And there it is. Doubt. He tries so hard to keep it hidden, but she always recognizes the signs: hands stuffed in the pockets of his trousers, boots scuffing the grated floor of the Ebon Hawk. And, really—after all this time, he still doesn’t know? “I chose you, Atton.”“Doesn’t answer my question, though, does it?”She sighs. “I haven’t changed my mind.”He grins. “Good, because I was really looking forward to, y’know, trekking through the jungle, possibly murdering a Sith or two…”“Don’t forget the beasts,” she adds, halfheartedly.“The beasts,” he echoes, nodding. “I’m sure there’ll be plenty of those. Maybe if I’m lucky I’ll get to try out that new thing you taught me—”“Atton.” His name. Just his name. It lingers in the air between them, heavy, the shadow of a noose.He peers through the rain. At her, or maybe just through her. In any case, she’s not entirely sure where to look. “Halo,” he says, after a moment. Just her name. Soft, low, pounding against her skull.“Just—” She huffs out a breath. “Be careful.”The grin returns. Brighter, this time. It doesn’t quite fit right. “You know me.”“Exactly.” A pause. “I chose you to lead this mission, Atton, and—” she lifts a hand, palm outward— “before you say anything, no, I still haven’t changed my mind. I trust you. But just because I trust you doesn’t mean I’m ignorant to what you’re going to face.”Silence. Raindrops pound into the ground, tearing up grass, bits of soil, rock. She sees Bao-Dur, in the distance—or, she supposes, his silhouette. Kreia, too. They should leave soon. And, she thinks, the sooner the better; Dxun is, in many ways, the same moon it was years ago. A dark, harsh curve, cutting out parts of sky.Finally, he speaks, and she can feel the rage in him. It ripples outward, bending the air, the water, the silence. She wants to touch it, wants to let it buck beneath the weight of her palm, but knows she shouldn’t—there are things he doesn’t let her see, and she has to respect that, has to respect the part of him that still, after all this time, wants—needs—to hide.“If you don’t think I can handle it,” he says, and his mouth hooks an awful sneer, “then maybe you should send—”“Atton.” His name, again. The first thing he’d trusted her with, and even that was a lie. “I have sent—” and here her voice breaks, almost imperceptibly, another crack in that vast white wall— “so many people to their deaths. Good, innocent people—”“I’m neither of those things.”“Well, neither am I.” She hadn’t meant to snap. But it comes out that way, reckless, needy. “What I’m trying to say is that—stars, Atton. I trust you more than anyone, and if you die, I don’t think I’ll be able to—” Her eyes are stinging, but she can’t tell if it’s from the rain or her tears or the Force, digging its claws into her.She turns away.A moment passes. And then, a hand, resting lightly—hesitantly—on her shoulder. His fingers curl against the solid plating of her armor, and she thinks, Don’t let go.He doesn’t.“Hey,” he says, and his voice is—she wouldn’t call it soft, but it’s somewhere near there. “I’m not going to die, Halo.”“You better not.”He squeezes, and a breath leaves her—warm, misty. Solidifying. “I promise,” he says, and she wants to believe him, but—But she keeps seeing his body. His dead body, to be precise. Eyes glazed over, hands cut off, blood pouring from his open mouth. And she knows it’s the Force. Showing her the future or, at the very least, a possible future. The bodies of her crew, ravaged, just like Atton’s—they line the path she walks, prostrating, sometimes even headless; a reminder, really, to not stray too far. A warning.She closes her eyes, and her heart lurches. Even there, behind that veil, he is there. Staring at her, lifeless, but his mouth still forms a word.Her name. Always her name.Her eyes snap open. She turns, pivoting on a heel, and he startles, stepping back. Halo, he starts to say, but she’s already tugging him towards her, grasping at anything, everything, even the fabric of his hood.His eyes find her—dark, gleaming. And there’s something there: regret, or guilt, or something different altogether. She likes to think it’s want.He exhales. Blinks. Are you sure?She nods. And then he’s leaning down, and she’s arcing up, and their mouths meet, teeth clashing together.She wouldn’t even call it a kiss. It’s quick. Too quick to mean anything, but his hands still find her hips, pressing half-moons into the bone; his arms still find her middle, crushing her against him. Her hands find his hair, his jaw, the scar on his left temple from the fight with the Twi’leks on G0-T0’s ship, and it’s—desperation, and fear, and something dark. Nameless. Reflective, like liquid. The Force flares, a gust of heat, and—She pulls away. He lets out a small, breathy sound, chasing after her, but she presses her palm to his chest. He bows his head, panting.He looks strangely penitent.“Come back to me,” she says, finally, once she’s found her voice. “Please, Atton.”He shudders. She feels it through the Force, but also through their bodies, pressed so firmly together. And it’s almost too much—what she wants; what she can’t have, not here, not now. And, underlying all that, what he wants: not the images he projects to keep her and Kreia from probing his mind, but similar. Softer. Something meant for another world, or maybe just other people.She steps back. He reaches for her, arms outstretched, but the rain separates them—a nearly impenetrable wall.“Remember,” she says. “You promised.”She leaves.He doesn’t follow her.
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
He tries to hide his presence from her.Which isn’t surprising. If their positions were reversed—a strange, impossible thing, one she rarely thinks about: but when she does, it’s with something akin to regret, all those years she spent on the outside looking in—she would probably do the same. Nar Shaddaa is, as he once said, a perfect place to lose oneself. It’s why she hid here for so long after the war, hands shaky, unstable. She couldn’t even hold a glass of juma, the glass shattering to red bits in her grasp.She can’t see him, but she can see him, glowing softly in the center of her mind. He slips effortlessly through the throngs, dipping this way, ducking that. It’s an art. A dance, the steps intricate, complex. But of course he knows it well. Pride radiates from him, tinged with smugness, a bruise turning oily green.It almost feels like a game. Though everything’s a game, these days, and it makes her nostalgic for the nights spent in the cockpit of the Ebon Hawk—Atton playing pazaak in his head, counting the totals under his breath, Halosia watching him. Learning.He comes up behind her. And she doesn’t say anything, just scoots to one side, patting the ground beside her.“Damn,” breathes Atton, and there’s amusement, there, with just the right amount of annoyance. He doesn’t like to fail. Or, she supposes, he doesn’t like to be known, and this—whenever he tries to sneak up on her, the soles of his boots like tiny hammers on the inside of her skull—is perhaps the worst kind of flouting, that she always knows where he is, that she can always pick him out of a crowd. “And here I thought I was doing so well.”“You rely too much on your surroundings,” she says, “and not enough on the Force itself. It’s easy to get lost here, which is sometimes a good thing, sometimes the key to recognizing someone you know, even if they’re trying their best to blend in.”She remembers what Kreia said. It is Nar Shaddaa, the true Nar Shaddaa, that you feel around you. It is this moon, with the metal and machines stripped away and the currents of the Force laid bare. And what she’d said in return: The currents are moving so fast, almost frantically.Everything is fast, here. Desperate. And when she closes her eyes—blots out everything but the Force, which so often lies dormant inside her—focuses, she can feel the keening. The want, so undeniable, too loud to ignore. But Atton is at home on this moon. An animal returned to its habitat. And so there’s a quietness in him, one she does not pick up on anywhere else. Not even in the Hawk’s cockpit, sequestered from everyone else, even her. And perhaps he senses the same thing in her, even now, even after so long.Atton sighs, settling beside her. For a moment, their shoulders brush, and that—that, the eye of the storm. Her body remembers every place they’ve touched. The sensation, which is so much like being burnt alive—she remembers it well: all those voices, crying out as one; a great sound, followed by the sickest hush—is magnified, here. Which is maybe why he comes with her on these trips. Maybe he feels it, too.“They’re loading the Hawk,” he says. “I managed to haggle the price down a bit, and before you say anything, no, I did not use the Force to persuade him. So get off my back, all right?”She doesn’t say anything. Just peers at him, brow quirked. “You don’t believe me?” He sounds appalled. And it’s awful, but her lips curl of their own accord, hinting at a smile. His lips part, too—wider, wider—as he knocks his shoulder with hers. “I always knew you were capable of it.”“Of what?”“Smiling.”She snorts. “You’re such an ass.”“You like it.”She hums, unwilling to legitimize him with a response. But the answer’s obvious—of course she likes it, and of course it’s why she brings him with her on these short little supply runs. The Ebon Hawk has felt strangely… small, of late, and stifling. Not enough room for even just the two of them, not since—She shakes her head. Pushes the thought away, but it’s too late—the image is already there, heels dug into her soil, bursts of flowers at its feet. So many things she tries to forget, and the kiss is one she just cannot seem to let go of. Maybe because it returns when he touches her, a sudden snap of sensation. A thousand moments, all at once, and all of them include his mouth on hers. The sound of bodies squelching together in the pouring-down rain.Atton’s looking at her. And she knows he knows. She can feel him there, right at the barrier, fingering the hole the memory wriggles through. Making it harder for her to resist it—this—him.“Atton,” she says, quietly.“What?” But he’s still there—poke, poke, poke.“Don’t.” A warning. But this is Atton, and they are on Nar Shaddaa. This is where he’s at his most cocky, which is to say this is where he’s at his most dangerous.“Would it be so bad?” His voice is light. And she’s sure that, if she were to tear at the hole herself, a procession of vulgar images would nest in her body, pressing hungrily against her skull. Even now, he is trying to protect himself, and it marvels her. This tired, hungry planet, and all he can think about is her, the damage she could do if allowed to roam free.It’s not the images she cares about, though. It’s what lies beneath—the softness there, the softness only she sees. And if he were to let her in, that’s what she’d see. No matter what happens in Atton’s mind, the fantasies he conjures, he is always there at the break of dawn. They share a bed, and his arm is slung around her waist, nose pressed to the nape of her neck.“Would it be so bad?” he asks, again. She almost loses it—him—in the sea of energy, rippling inward, converging on her.“It was a mistake.”He shakes his head. “No.”“Yes,” she presses. “It’s not as easy as—”“Going after what you want?”He makes it sound easy. And she can’t blame him for that—once, a very long time ago, choices had come easy for her. Do this or the Republic falls. Do that or people die. But things are rarely so clear-cut, it seems, now that she’s older. In the grand scheme of things, war is easy. There are worse things that life has to offer, like what comes after war, like what happens when the ground is all smoke and even the dimmest of lights have been blown out.Still. It’s nice to think about. She remembers his hand on the back of her head, holding her, keeping her steady. Or maybe it’s more accurate to say that her body remembers. Which would explain how it aches for him. How even the most unknowable things seem familiar.“I’m an island,” she says, quietly. And Atton snorts.“You’re a what now?”“An island.” She lifts a shoulder. “Something the Masters used to say.”His brows are dark, jagged. She thinks of the lightning strikes on Dxun, the charred earth they leave behind. “I call bullshit. If you’re an island, Halo, we’re all gonna drown.”Maybe. But then again, maybe—“And if we’re all drowning?” She still can’t look at him. “What then?”He exhales, and the breath is short, raspy. Like a laugh, but not quite. “Then we latch onto the first person we see,” he says, finally, “and we never let go. Not for anything.”
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
Atton, she notices, rarely ever seems to laugh. Though maybe it’s a failing on her part, a failing to recognize that animal in him, more tender than she’s used to.He laughs when he kisses her, but that is less of a laugh, more of an unraveling. Sometimes he bites her lip—usually it’s an accident, because of course they get carried away, relieved to be apart from their bodies, relieved to be in the hands of someone other than themselves—and he’ll pull back, eyes wide. Halo. And she’ll shake her head, hands coming up to touch his jaw, the vein near his neck, the one that throbs. It’s okay. And he laughs. And it’s quiet. Unassuming. Disbelieving, maybe, that they can both have such violence inside them, yet still possess a faculty for love.Maybe he’s waiting for her to run. And, really, she can’t blame him—in many ways, she, too, is waiting for him to run, only every time she thinks they’ve finally crossed that line in the sand, she turns, and Atton’s… there. Which is probably why she holds him so tightly, even in the cockpit of the Ebon Hawk, even when there’s nowhere for him to go.(She’d asked him, once, where he’d go. And he’d shrugged, gesturing to the space stretching before them: a pin-pricked haze of emptiness, interrupted by occasional ribbons of nebulae. Somewhere.
That’s not an answer.
What do you want me to say? He’d looked at her, then, eyes dark, gleaming. That I’ve thought about leaving? Because I have.So have I. Only she always seems to go beyond leaving, to never coming back. What it would feel like to thrust a ‘saber through her gut, propel a sheet of songsteel clear through her skull.That’s what makes us who we are, he’d said. We’re pragmatists, Halo. Nothing lasts forever. We’ve learned that the hard way.)There are lines everywhere, though. The desert follows them—perhaps even lives inside them, turning their mouths dry, their tongues a kind of useless muscle. She doubts he’ll tell her when it’s time and, really, she’s glad for that. What would she say? What would convince him to stay?Nothing. And nothing would convince her to stay, either, not even the things Kreia says—those strange almost-prophecies, the ones that leave her uncertain, or on craggy ground. Something calls to her. Something beyond the Outer Rim, in Wild Space, or perhaps even in a different life altogether. And she thinks Atton deserves better than that, better than an ending with her, an ending that is not an end and more of a descent into slumber. So when he laughs, she does not try to bottle it, or even really tame it. (She’s sure the Force would let her. Even now, it writhes, with the hunger that pervades Nar Shaddaa.) That soft-mouthed creature, not meant for her ears.At least the Ebon Hawk bears witness to it.
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Feel Better
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{
"Archive Warning": "Underage Sex",
"Category": "M/M",
"Characters": "Kujo Jotaro, Higashikata Josuke (JoJo: Diamond is Unbreakable)",
"Fandom": "ジョジョの奇妙な冒険 | JoJo no Kimyou na Bouken | JoJo's Bizarre Adventure",
"Language": "English",
"Rating": "Explicit",
"author": "by DoomsDaisy",
"chapters": "1/1",
"completed": "",
"published": "2017-04-07T00:00:00",
"words": "5,861",
"Additional Tags": "Incest, accidental drugging, Massage, Pining, Hand Jobs, Aphrodisiacs, Icy Hot Patch Mention",
"Relationship": "Higashikata Josuke/Kujo Jotaro",
"Character": null,
"Relationships": null,
"Series": null,
"Collections": null,
"Fandoms": null,
"Archive Warnings": null,
"Categories": null,
"Bookmarks": null,
"Chapters": null,
"Comments": null,
"Completed": null,
"Hits": null,
"Kudos": null,
"Published": null,
"Words": null,
"Updated": null
}
|
Jotaro was something else altogether. He had an air about him that radiated silent power, with a physique to match it. Other people noticed it too. Just walking down the street with the man drew awed stares. Even if Jotaro himself seemed ignorant to them (maybe he was just used to it) Josuke noticed all too much and couldn’t help but feel a little delighted that he was friends with such a guy—not only friends, but his senior in a family standpoint.Okay, maybe that was stretching it a bit, but it was still a fun thought.But even if he kinda liked the stares, it was nice to have him to himself for once. The area of beach they were at was completely deserted right now, nothing but the sound of gulls and the loud rush of waves breaking. It was an overcast day with a bit of a bite to the wind so it was no wonder that no one was laying out on the sand. Well, that and the fact that this beach really didn’t have sand—it was more like poorly crushed seashell fragments and rocks.But even as Josuke crunched through the detritus, Jotaro was removing his shoes and socks.“Are you getting in the water?” Josuke exclaimed, making his way over to Jotaro.Jotaro hummed quietly, his half-assed response hardly audible over the natural sounds of the beach.“It’s gotta be freezing, though!” Josuke watched in shock as Jotaro stripped off his jacket and began rolling up his pant legs, displaying the tanned, hard muscle of his calves. “And it’s so rocky, you’re gonna get cut or something.”“I guess it’s a good thing I have you here with me, then.”Josuke scoffed, even if the thought secretly pleased him. The fact that his Stand power could protect Jotaro was something he was immensely proud of, even if he would never say so out loud.Without another word, Jotaro plodded into the shallow water, the stormy grey of it’s frothy waves batting against the skin of his bare legs. If it was cold—and it definitely was—Jotaro didn’t show it.Josuke scoffed again and took a seat on the rough ground as he watched the man trundle awkwardly through the water, bent at the waist to see better.It certainly wasn’t how he expected to spend his afternoon. He had been building up the courage all week to ask Jotaro to hang out. Besides the few odd times they ran into each other and the meetings they had with other friendly Stand users, they never really saw each other. And Josuke wasn’t going to lie to himself. He definitely had a crush on Jotaro. Silly? Yes. Immoral? Probably. Never gonna happen? Definitely. But knowing those things didn’t stop the flutter in his chest every time he saw the man.Asking him to hang out had been a far stretch to begin with. Josuke had been 100% ready to let it go if it didn’t pull through because after all, Jotaro was a man. Josuke, despite his looks, really was nothing more than a goofy teen. Why would someone as cool as Jotaro wanna spend their free time pretty much babysitting?And when Jotaro had said he had plans for that afternoon, Josuke was ready to hang up the phone and be done with it. Even if he had known the chances were next to none to begin with, it still wounded him that his nagging insecurities had been right all along. But right as Josuke was sucking in a breath to stumble out some cheery reply, Jotaro had asked if Josuke would like to accompany him. Under normal circumstances it would have been embarrassing to reply as fast as he did, but he was so excited that he practically yelled “Yes!” in Jotaro’s ear.He hadn’t known what he had agreed to, but he was head over heels to know that Jotaro had invited him somewhere—even moreso when he found out it was the beach.He had no idea he would be sitting around watching Jotaro look for some starfish he had seen the other day. It was a bit weird, yeah, but it was better than sitting at home and playing video games. And at least he was with Jotaro.“So is this what you usually do with your free time?” Josuke shouted.Jotaro didn’t bother raising his voice, even with the distance and noise between them. “Sometimes.”Josuke hummed to himself, watching as Jotaro clapped a hand on his hat as a strong ocean breeze threatened to pull it away.“Do you like oceans and stuff?”Jotaro leaned forward so that his nose was nearly touching the water, seeming to spot something before shaking his head and plodding forward slowly. Josuke knew that the head shake wasn’t pointed at his question. Hell, just looking at what Jotaro was doing in freezing saltwater was enough of an answer, honestly.He decided to just be quiet and watch, absently picking up handfuls of the rocky sand and sifting it through his fingers. He wished he had a camera with him, or maybe had the art talent of someone like Rohan. The heavy clouds above them stretched out as far as the eye could see, making the air itself feel heavy and the water appear dark and sinister. With the starkness of his black turtleneck and his white pants, Jotaro seemed so sharply contrasted with his surroundings, making him seem like the subject of some pretty painting.That is, until Jotaro’s arms wind milled comically and he landed on his ass in the water.“Jotaro-san!” Even if it has been a little funny to watch, Josuke was completely serious as he hopped up and ran to the water, not bothering to slide off his shoes or roll up his pants. He helped Jotaro up quickly, though the man seemed completely capable of doing it himself.“Jellyfish sting.” Jotaro commented blandly, picking a piece of seaweed from his water-heavy sweater and tossing it into the water. “It just surprised me.”“Come on,” Josuke tugged on Jotaro’s arm. “Let’s get to shore so I can look at it.”“I’m fine.”Josuke huffed before shivering, only just now aware of the icy water sloshing in his shoes. He was going to give up when he saw dark blood dripping from Jotaro’s hand, the fat drops landing in the water and being washed away by the lazy waves.“You’re not fine!” Josuke chastised, grabbing Jotaro’s arm and trying to move him. “You’re bleeding, Jotaro-san!”Jotaro looked down and raised his hand to inspect, as if only just now noticing the injury. “Then fix me up so I can continue.”Josuke felt like a mother chastising a stubborn child. “I’m not gonna fix anything up until you get out. You’re lips are turning blue, for christ’s sake.”Jotaro was soaked to the bone, his shirt clinging even moreso to his chest than normal, his nipples sharply pressing against the fabric. And his pants—Josuke swallowed and tried to keep his eyes from wandering down, but the small glimpse he did take revealed the white fabric now being near transparent and showing the skin of Jotaro’s firm thigh muscles. Jotaro touched his lips, which had indeed taken on the lightest blue tint.Josuke pulled at him again and Jotaro finally conceded, the two of them taking unsteady steps from the water. They made their way over to Jotaro’s jacket and shoes and sat in the rocky sand, Josuke situating himself in front of the man, his Stand already out and ready to fix him up.Josuke took Jotaro’s hand and found the gash, not long but very obviously deep and still steadily dribbling blood. Crazy Diamond gently touched the wound and the sliced skin closed up neatly, a few small pebbles falling from the cut before closing altogether.“Thank you.”Josuke looked up at Jotaro as his Stand shimmered away. “Does it feel better?”“Yeah.”It took a lot of effort to keep a happy smile from spreading across his face. “I’m glad.” He sobered up and looked at Jotaro’s feet, trying to see the sting. “I don’t think Crazy Diamond can fix your jellyfish problem though, since nothing’s broken…”Jotaro moved his foot to the side and they both looked at the red, angry area. It definitely didn’t look like it felt good, his ankle was all swollen and puffy.“It’ll be better by tomorrow.” Jotaro said matter of factly, turning his attention away from his ankle to begin stripping off his shirt.“I-is there anything I can do to help?” Josuke stuttered, looking away as Jotaro’s pale, toned stomach came into view. “I saw somewhere that if you, um—““You’re not pissing on my foot, if that’s where you’re going with this.”Josuke snapped his mouth shut.He heard the wet slap of Jotaro’s shirt hitting the ground and felt his face go red. He had every intention of keeping his eyes to himself but when Jotaro stood his gaze was drawn to him, which was both a blessing and a curse. On one hand, to see Jotaro towering over him, his pecs wet and full and his nipples dark and so damn hard….seeing his stomach moving lightly with his breathing, seeing those cold blue eyes staring down at him...it was a sight straight out of Josuke’s wet dreams. But on the other hand, Josuke’s eyes couldn’t help to venture down and notice that he was level with Jotaro’s crotch, and the transparent white pants were showing him the outline of the man’s prick, surrounded by a dark mass that he could only assume were the man’s pubes.Jotaro wasn’t wearing underwear.In any other situation, it would have been great masturbation fodder to file away. But being so close to it, so close he could see the outline of the thick head, it made him let out a shaky gasp and completely freeze. Being the horny little teen that he was, the sight went straight to his cock. He couldn’t remember ever getting so hard so fast.It couldn’t have lasted any more than 2 seconds, but the amount of scenarios that flew through Josuke’s mind were dizzying. He hardly realized when Jotaro moved away to grab his coat from the ground and shrug it on until the man spoke.“You can borrow my shoes.”Josuke hopped up and made a declining gesture. “N-nah, that’s ok, really—“Jotaro had buttoned up his coat and now was turned away from Josuke, bending at the waist. “It’s my fault yours are all wet. Go ahead and put them on.” Jotaro straightened up, holding his sopping wet pants in his hands.Dear lord.Jotaro was completely naked, save for his long coat.Josuke would have insisted that he didn’t want them again if his throat hadn’t seemed to collapse in on itself. With jerky movements he went to Jotaro’s shoes and stripped his own off.
Naked, naked, Jotaro is buck ass naked right now—
Josuke slipped the shoes on, noting that they were a bit bigger than his own.
He’s probably so cold, I wish I could open his coat and press myself against him—
He balled up his socks and stuck them in his wet shoes before standing, two fingers hooked in the back of them.
He’d taste like sea water, and I’d rub myself against him to make him warm—
“You ready to go?”Josuke nodded, looking out into the water to keep his eyes off of Jotaro. If only he weren’t such a damned coward, maybe he really could do something like that. But he knew that he’d never have the balls to make the first move. ~ Jotaro was stubborn. Josuke had called him the next morning, asking if the sting was any better. When Jotaro said it was just fine Josuke, seeing another opportunity to hang out with the man, said they should go back to the beach. Today was already so much warmer and sunnier than yesterday, and he knew a place where the sand was a lot better.Jotaro had shot down the idea with a sigh though, and Josuke felt himself deflate. Evidently the man was sore from yesterday, he had pulled some muscle in his back so he was spending the day in bed.The news worried Josuke, and he told the man he needed to go see a doctor. Jotaro had flatly declined. But you need medicine, Josuke had insisted, but Jotaro seemed wholly against it.When he hung up the phone, Josuke felt worry gnawing in the pit of his stomach. Jotaro was just so damned stubborn. If he hadn’t noticed the deep gash at first, just how bad would his back have to be in order for him to take bed rest for a day?Josuke made up his mind to get something to help ease Jotaro’s pain.Okuyasu had told him about the guy, one of Keicho’s old friends. He was technically a drug dealer, but Okuyasu said that he was friendly. He had evidently supplied Okuyasu with good pain medicine on multiple occasions. Josuke only had to see the cloudy look in his friend’s eyes to know why he had needed them, and why he hadn’t needed them since Keicho died.Okuyasu had called the student and set up a meeting for Josuke. It was nerve wracking walking to the little alley beside the ice cream shop, but when he saw the person he was supposed to meet he felt a little better about the situation. Jolly and round, the guy had a huge smile and greeted him like an old friend.“Josuke-kun!”Josuke smiled awkwardly and gave a polite bow, which was quickly pulled into a hug by the older boy.When they parted, the boy patted his hanging stomach warmly and looked Josuke over. “Oku-chan told me you had a little problem, yeah?”“Y-yes.” Josuke fought the urge to look around himself, knowing it would look suspicious as hell.“You need to get someone to relax a little, right?”Josuke had told Okuyasu that he needed muscle relaxers, it seemed he had already conveyed it to the guy. “Yes please.”The teen patted his stomach again before sliding his hand in his pocket and pulling out a small ziplock baggie, much like what a spare button would be put in on a new garment. He quickly put it in Josuke’s palm and gave him a wink. “You give your girl this and she’ll be feeling real good in no time, if you know what I mean.”“I-I’m not sure I do.”He laughed heartily at that, and Josuke awkwardly laughed with him. He looked briefly at the little baggie, seeing two little blue pills, before tucking it hastily into his pants pocket.“How much--?”“For a friend of little Oku? I’ll let you have em for free!” He winked happily again. “At least for the first time.”Josuke bowed again, thanked him, and made a hasty retreat.He wanted to get these to Jotaro as soon as he could. ~ He moved the shopping bag to his other hand before knocking.“Jotaro-san, it’s me.”He knew Jotaro might be trying to get up right now and didn’t want to inconvenience him so he tried the doorknob and found that it was unlocked. It was a good thing he decided to be a little bold, because Jotaro was halfway from his bed, sitting up with a grimace and one leg off the mattress.“Ah, Lay down, it’s just me!” Josuke put the bag down and rushed over to him to help him get situated again, but Jotaro batted him away.“I’m fine.”Josuke sucked his teeth but put his hands up to show that he wouldn’t mess with him. “I never said you weren’t.”He tutted lightly and felt the initial rush of adrenaline die down somewhat, only to have it spike up immediately as he looked over Jotaro, clad in one of the fluffy white hotel robes, a sliver of his chest visible.Was he wearing anything under that thing?Jotaro snorted out a rare laugh, drawing Josuke from his thoughts. “Smartass.” He eased himself back against the propped pillow so that he was reclining. “You didn’t have to go out of your way.”Josuke waved his hands in front of himself. “It was no trouble, honestly. I had nothing better to do.” He made his way back to the doorway and snatched the bag from the ground. “I just wanted to check on you and bring you a few things.”“Thank you.”Josuke blushed and distracted himself with rifling through the bag. “Let’s see…I got you some apple juice because I know when I’m sick I really like it.” He looked up at Jotaro and added quickly, “Not that you’re sick. It’s just, you know, since you’re stuck in bed, kinda like when you’re sick—““I love apple juice.”Josuke could feel the blush on his cheeks deepen. “Ah, y-yeah, me too. I’m glad.” He shook his head, as if trying to dislodge his jitters. Hopefully Jotaro didn’t notice that his hands were trembling. “Um, I brought you some icy hot patches—they help with sore muscles and stuff, they’re really awesome….and uh, I rented you some movies, since you’re kinda stuck here all day. I didn’t know what kinds you liked, so I just got a bunch of different things.”“That was very thoughtful of you, Josuke.”“I, um…” Josuke could see the last thing near the bottom of the bag, his skin prickling with how fast and hot it was heating up. “Got…” He felt like a weirdo now, the other things he brought were already sufficient, but when he had been at the store and seen the last thing, it had seemed like a good idea.He breathed in deeply and let his words out on a quick rush. “I got baby oil in case you wanted a massage!”Jotaro’s eyes widened minutely before settling back into a neutral expression, though Josuke could hear a hint of amusement in his voice. “Well, you certainly thought of everything.”“I just—“ Josuke set the bag on the little table, next to the phone. “I just want you to get better, is all.”“I told you, it really isn’t that bad.”Josuke poked around the minifridge and found a sleeve of disposable cups. He plucked one free and opened the fridge, grateful for the cool air it blew on his burning face. “I know you did. But I still wanna help as best as I can, I guess.” Not to mention you’re a stubborn liar, Josuke wanted to add as he put some ice in the cup. You’re definitely more hurt than you’re letting on. He closed the fridge with the side of his shoe and made his way back to the table, pulling the apple juice from the bag. He made sure his back was to Jotaro as he worked quickly, his shaking hands making it difficult to pop the small pills open and pour them in. He pocketed the empty capsules and poured the juice, making sure it hit the powder and dissolved it.There was the smallest thread of guilt in his stomach, but he tamped it down swiftly, knowing he was doing this completely with Jotaro’s well being in mind.He twirled the golden contents around a few times, the ice tinkling clunkily against the styrofoam. He put on a big smile and turned back to Jotaro, walking across the room to the bed. “Here you go, Jotaro-san.”Jotaro grimaced as he scooted up a bit more to take the cup, but he had a playful glimmer in his eyes. “I should take bed rest more often if you’re gonna dote on me like this.”Josuke nearly let out a squeak at the seemingly flirtatious words. But of course they weren’t flirtatious, Jotaro wouldn’t flirt with him…It was probably just him reading too much into it.Jotaro downed nearly half the cup in a few deep swallows and Josuke allowed himself a silent moment of victory. Tomorrow Jotaro would wake up feeling fantastic, not knowing it was all thanks to Josuke.Jotaro wiped his mouth with the back of his hand and tried to sit the cup on the night table but he let out a small pained grunt as he leaned over. Josuke flew to his side and plucked the cup from his fingers to do it for him.“Don’t overdo it, Jotaro-san.”“Josuke.”Josuke absently wiped the hot sweat that had collected in the crease of his palm on his pants as he looked down at the man. “Yeah?”“Were you serious about giving me a back rub?”His heart had been beating a little too fast since he entered the hotel room, but now it kicked into high gear.“A-absolutely!”Jotaro hummed and scratched the back of his hand absently. “I don’t want to be a bother, but I think something like that would help.”Josuke nearly stumbled over his own feet in his rush to retrieve the baby oil. “It’s no problem, for real!” He quickly grabbed the oil from the bag and nearly tripped again in his hurry to help Jotaro, whose face was scrunched in pain as he struggled to sit up. “J-just take it easy, Jotaro-san.” Josuke said, supporting Jotaro’s back with his arm. “I’m here to help in any way I can.”Jotaro blew a steadying breath from his nose. “Will you, ah, help me get this off my arms?” He stiffly pulled the robe tie around his waist free to make it easier.Josuke swallowed hard and nodded, the voice in his head having no other thoughts but AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!! With sweaty hands, he tugged at the sleeve closest to him as Jotaro pulled his arm out slowly. As soon as that one was free Josuke pulled the sleeve away, thinking he was going to remove the whole robe but was instead greeted by the sight of Jotaro’s soft cock resting against his hairy balls.
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!
Jotaro pulled the loose robe over his groin, swiftly but without embarrassment.“S-sorry, oh my god.” Josuke stammered, hiding his face in his hands even though Jotaro was already covered.“Don’t worry about it.”Josuke nodded and let his hands drag down his face before steeling himself to lean forward and help Jotaro with his other sleeve.Helping Jotaro onto his stomach was an ordeal. The man could do it himself, but he was slow to move, giving Josuke plenty of time to appreciate the hot, hard muscles on his stomach as he offered a steadying hand.By the time Jotaro was stretched out, his arms wrapped around a pillow, Josuke was almost embarrassingly erect. He stood by the side of the bed, making sure to stay out of Jotaro’s line of sight as he allowed himself to appreciate the sexy curve of his tanned back and the roundness of his ass, visible even through the robe draped over it.He was going to die doing this, he just knew it. But damn, what a way to die.“Josuke?”“Y-yeah! Um, sorry I was uh, distracted for a sec.” He climbed onto the bed and thought briefly before taking his school jacket off. He didn’t want to get oil on the sleeves. He scooted closer to Jotaro as he grabbed the baby oil. “Okay, I’ll just—“ He snapped the lid open and hovered the bottle over Jotaro’s back before squeezing it gently and letting the viscous fluid roll down his spine, watching it pool in the dip of his lower back.He didn’t know how much he needed but he figured that was good enough and closed the bottle before setting it to the side. With trembling hands, he reached out and awkwardly began coating Jotaro’s back, shivering at getting to touch his crush so intimately.“It’ll probably be easier if you’re on top of me.”“Y-yeah, that makes sense.”The screaming began anew in his head as he carefully climbed on top of Jotaro and settled his weight lightly on his ass. The view was even better like this—the thought that this is what he would see if they were having sex made it almost impossible for him to move, so enamored by the fantasy that he was.After a few seconds of indulgence, Josuke finally got to work, rubbing the oily planes of Jotaro’s back some more. He let his fingers press into the hard nubs of his spine, loving the way his fingers slipped over Jotaro’s healthy skin.When he pressed into the lower back Jotaro tensed and let out a soft grunt. So that’s where it hurt. Josuke worked his hands back up, grabbing the hard muscles on his shoulders and kneading them with steady pressure. He would work his way down to the problem area, to let Jotaro adjust and relax to the idea.God, his cock was so hard. He let his weight settle more comfortably on Jotaro’s ass, holding back a whine as his tight balls were pressed into the soft mound of muscle. He released the lax muscles and moved his hands down, his eyes focusing on Jotaro’s birthmark—the same birthmark that he himself had. The little star probably should have made him guilty. After all, what clearer testament to the wrongness of his crush would there be? But instead of feeling bad, it excited him. That little star was a symbol of their bloodline, and without their shared blood, Josuke would have never met the man. He wanted to lean down and kiss it, as if saying thank you for bringing Jotaro-san to me.Instead, Josuke worked the skin around it, happy to find a small tense knot there to give him an excuse to lavish the birthmark in attention. Jotaro groaned and his shoulders rolled a bit as Josuke worked the area.“D-does it feel good?”“Mm hmm.”Josuke gave the area another slippery squeeze and Jotaro made that sweet noise again. He allowed his hips to curl forward just the slightest in a phantom thrust, a little action that could easily be taken as him readjusting himself.He moved his hands down Jotaro’s hot skin, ready to find a new area to knead, but the light touch made Jotaro keen again. Even if the noise made his now precum-sticky cock jolt, he was quick to go into panic mode.“Ah—are you hurting more? Was I too rough?”“No,” Jotaro breathed, his words slightly muffled by the pillow he was clinging to. “Your touch just…feels good.”Josuke’s eyes went wide and his hands hesitated briefly before dragging slowly and firmly down Jotaro’s toned back. This time Jotaro sighed heavily, but Josuke could feel the man’s ass clench and tremble underneath him. He pulled his hands away quickly, as if he had been burned. “Jotaro-san,” Josuke huffed. “Don’t lie to make me feel better. I hurt you, didn’t I?”“I’m not. Just…keep going.”Josuke hesitated for no more than a handful of seconds but it was enough to make Jotaro groan in aggravation. Before he could do anything a large body was pressing against his back. He yipped in surprise but saw the large purple hands sneaking around his arms. Jotaro had called out his Stand.Star Platinum’s strong hands clasped around his own and forced them to press down and slide down Jotaro’s back, making both of them gasp in unison. He could feel Jotaro’s ass clench again but this time it was accompanied by a rough grind of Star Platinum’s hips into Josuke’s lower back, and he noted with a jolt that there was something large and distinctly hard rubbing against him.“J-Jotaro… Jotaro-sannn—“ He couldn’t help but let out a winded whine as the force of the slow grind made his balls drag along Jotaro’s ass.“I’m sorry,” Jotaro gasped, even as Star Platinum forced Josuke’s hands onto the bed and pushed him forward so that Josuke’s chest was pressed against the man’s back, the baby oil quickly soaking through his thin tank top.Josuke was effectively sandwiched between Jotaro and his Stand, reduced to a whining mess as Star Platinum began to rut against him with small and eager movements. Jotaro seemed in no better of a state though he tried to muffle his pants and groans of pleasure against the pillow in front of him.“Jotaro-san, ahh--! J-Jotaro—“Jotaro’s arms came around in an awkward backwards embrace and desperately touched everything he could of Josuke’s in such a position.“I’m sorry,” Jotaro breathed hoarsely, “I’m so s-sorry Josuke, fuck—“Josuke had never heard Jotaro’s voice so full of emotion, quavering and thick. Just the sound of it was enough to tumble Josuke over the edge of orgasm, a short and scratchy shout bubbling from his throat as he shot hot cum messily into his underwear.The next thing he knew, he was on his back on the bed. Josuke sat up, disoriented at the sudden scenery change to see Jotaro next to him, sitting up and clutching the robe at his waist, his large chest heaving and his eyes in a heated daze.“Josuke, I—“ His hands tightened against the soft fluffy robe, the muscles in his arms jumping and twitching. “I don’t know what came over me, I’m really sorry.”He had no idea what had sparked this sudden lust in Jotaro, but damned if he wasn’t going to take full advantage of the situation.“Can I touch you some more?” He asked, his voice a shaky whisper.Jotaro’s fuzzy half-lidded eyes came up to look at him, full of so much desire that Josuke could already feel heat building in his stomach again. He almost looked pained with the way his brow was furrowed and his mouth was pulled in a loose frown.The man didn’t respond but as Josuke scooted closer he removed his hands slowly from the robe, as if silently urging the teen to continue.Josuke didn’t go to pull off the robe though, instead he brought his hands timidly to Jotaro’s chest, letting them run up the curve of his ribs before settling on the tight mounds of muscle, the nipples hard and pressing into his palms. Jotaro sighed heavily from his nose and closed his eyes as his head lulled to the side, as if the small touch eased him.Emboldened, Josuke got back on top of Jotaro, their groins pressed against each other. He nervously rutted against him a few times, his cock still swollen and overly sensitive from just orgasming but still twitching excitedly at the action, especially when Jotaro moaned appreciatively at the small friction. He groped Jotaro’s breasts will unskilled movements, loving the way that he could feel the muscles flex and tremble against his sweaty palms.“J-Josuke,” Jotaro’s eyes cracked open and Josuke saw with a cold thrill that there were tears threatening to spill from his glassy blue eyes. “More, please—““You want me to touch you more?” Josuke’s voice was thick and low with excitement and nerves. He trailed his hands down, shivering at the way Jotaro’s abs tightened as he brushed over them to rest on his hips. He moved himself down so he was sitting on the man’s thighs, letting his fingers pull the robe down just enough that Jotaro’s dark pubes were visible. God, he could see Jotaro’s cock jerking under the fabric, thick and eager for more. “You want me to touch you here?”Jotaro moaned at just the words and his cock gave another rough jump. “Fuck, please Josuke—“ The tears clouding his eyes finally broke free in two wet paths down his tanned cheeks, “Suck me, Josuke. Let me—Let me fuck your mouth,” Josuke watched in stunned silence as Jotaro writhed weakly on the bed before panting, “N-no, kiss me instead. And, aaah, rub our cocks together.” The man looked desperately at Josuke as the teen made no move. “Or fuck me, is that what you want? Fill me with your cum, fuck me hard—““J-Jotaro-san,” Josuke leaned forward so his hands were on either side of Jotaro’s head. He had no idea why this switch had suddenly been turned on in his nephew but it was making all of his senses short circuit—having all of his wildest fantasies assault him all at once was enough to make him feel drunk. “I can’t do all of that at once,” He let out a small laugh, his jitters subsiding somewhat. “What do you want?”“I want you.” Jotaro grabbed the back of Josuke’s neck and forced him down so they were a few mere centimeters apart. “I need you.”Before Josuke could retort Jotaro smashed their lips together in a sloppily heated kiss. Josuke had never tongue kissed before and had no idea what he was doing, but every little whimper and suck he gave made Jotaro moan loudly in gratitude.High on the positive reception, Josuke reached between them and clumsily jacked Jotaro off through the fabric of the robe, surprised when the man bit his bottom lip and let out something like a pained growl. He had no idea Jotaro had such a desperate side to him, he had always imagined him to be calm and stoic in bed, but he definitely didn’t mind being completely wrong.“Jotaro-san,” Josuke finally let his hand slip under the robe to touch Jotaro’s bare cock, so much hotter and thicker than he could have ever dreamed, “I’ve nngh—I’ve liked you for a long time.” Feeling the way Jotaro’s foreskin moved along his shaft and the way it pulsed in his hand was like heaven. “I’ve wanted to touch you like this…”“Josuke,” Jotaro said the name with such sweet gruffness that Josuke’s heart swelled with emotion.They locked into another kiss and with a handful of breathy whines Jotaro was spilling hot semen between them. Josuke pumped his jumping cock through it, feeling another orgasm of his own not far off.He rubbed himself tentatively against Jotaro’s thigh as he watched a thread of control return to Jotaro’s disposition as he came down from his high, though there was still a distinct underlying heat that never quite left his expression.“Josuke.”Even his voice sounded more composed now, though he couldn’t miss the light quiver at the end.“…Yeah?”“Call your mom.” His immediate thought was that he had done something wrong, but the worry was short lived as Jotaro continued. “Tell her you’ll be spending the night at my place.”“A-are you serious?” Josuke leaned up, even in his surprise able to appreciate the sight of Jotaro in his post-orgasm beauty, his skin sweaty and cum splattered on his stomach.“Do you not want to stay?”“Fuck yeah I do.”Jotaro’s eyes lit up in amusement at his quick and crude answer. “Then hurry up.”Josuke scrambled out of bed so fast that he nearly fell on his face.
|
10524804
|
Dance With The One Who
|
{
"Archive Warning": null,
"Category": null,
"Characters": "Chloe Frazer, Harry Flynn, Charlie Cutter, Nathan Drake, Rafe Adler, Talbot (Uncharted), Nadine Ross",
"Fandom": "Uncharted (Video Games)",
"Language": "English",
"Rating": "Explicit",
"author": "by NefelibataSpirit",
"chapters": "2/?",
"completed": "",
"published": "2017-04-17T00:00:00",
"words": "3,436",
"Additional Tags": "Alternate Universe - Historical, Historical, American History, Historical References, Crime Fighting, Alternate Universe - Criminals, Alternate Universe - Bonnie & Clyde, Fluff and Smut, Eventual Smut, Inspired by Real Events, Oral Sex, Vaginal Sex, Vaginal Fingering, Penis In Vagina Sex, Female Homosexuality, Leaving Home, Adventure & Romance, Action/Adventure, Adventure, Homosexuality, Period-Typical Homophobia, Implied/Referenced Homophobia, Great Depression, Weapons",
"Relationship": null,
"Character": null,
"Relationships": "Harry Flynn/Chloe Frazer, Nathan Drake/Elena Fisher, Elena Fisher & Chloe Frazer",
"Series": null,
"Collections": null,
"Fandoms": null,
"Archive Warnings": "Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death",
"Categories": "F/F, F/M, M/M",
"Bookmarks": null,
"Chapters": null,
"Comments": null,
"Completed": null,
"Hits": null,
"Kudos": null,
"Published": null,
"Words": null,
"Updated": null
}
|
Panicked voices were all you could hear on the radio, nowadays. Chloe scowled as her fingers grew tired of turning the knob on the broken radio. She cracked her aching fingers, remembering when these things became a big thing when it hit the shops and everyone just needed to have one. Simpler times.Now it's only used to see if there were any good news. So far, it was a useless attempt to even try.She rubbed her temples. Oh, how she missed Britain."Chloe." She turned warily to see her boss tapping his foot with frustrating tension. "I'm not paying you to lounge around by the radio all day. We've got customers for crying out loud!"Chloe briefly glanced around the small diner to see only three customers. One was sleeping near the window, another was reading the local paper that Chloe sometimes read and sipping on the black coffee that Chloe served about a half hour ago, and an all too familiar one was just stepping into the place. A gust of cold, January air swept over the small restaurant. Chloe internally groaned at the sight of Zoran Lazarevic cockily strolling towards the counter that she was stationed behind. Every time he came to the diner, he always made it a mission to flirt until he had run out of juice. She could feel her boss' warning eyes burning into the side of her head as Lazarevic sat down on one of the stools."How can I help you, sir?" Chloe sighed.
Zoran laughed. "Miss Frazer, you act like you don't know me."
"I wish I didn't."
"Chloe," her boss warned.
She rolled her eyes and got out her writing pad. "Can I take your order?"
She watched as he culled over his mental list of pick-up lines. Lazarevic smirked. "I'd like some eggs - scrambled, with some orange juice and a side of you. How about you finally show me what's under those clothes?"
That has got to be the lamest pick up line he has ever fired at her. Chloe had to bite back the snarky comment that could've easily gotten her fired. Actually, you know what?
"I don't know, Zoran," Chloe sneered, "We're out of eggs. How about a side of 'go fuck yourself, you old creep?'"
A frown slowly replaced the suggestive grin on his scarred face. She heard an incredulous gasp emit from her boss.It wasn't long before she was storming out of the small diner, unemployed, into the bitter cold. This is the third job that she had lost, but she has no regrets; she was tired of being seen as nothing but a pretty girl behind a counter who was vulnerable to blatant sexual harassment. She believed that she was more than that.Nothing seemed to go right anymore. Not after the stock market crashed. She walked the usual mile to her house, passing by what felt like fifty homeless people. She even passed by a family with a skinny greyhound. The children were cramped in a small but useful cardboard box while the parents were out begging for a few spare dollars. Chloe didn't have any dollars on her, but she did drop some change inside the tin cup."God bless ya," the mother croaked. Chloe assumed that she had caught a cold. The mother's tired eyes followed after the brooding young lady who had just helped her gain enough money to buy some medicine."I'm home," Chloe called, taking her boots off in the creaky foyer. The smell of broiled mutton chops wafted from the kitchen nearby. She heard a clank from the kitchen and in moments, her mother was standing in the doorway, studying her with worried eyes."You're home earlier than usual," the older woman rubbed her face warily, "Don't tell me--""Yeah, I got fired.""Again? What was it this time?" Her mother was fuming and Chloe didn't blame her, "Smart mouth?"When Chloe nodded sheepishly, Ms. Frazer groaned. "Chloe, I've told you a billion times, I have made you promise--""It was Lazarabitch! That bloke is always--""Watch your mouth!""--coming onto me! And you don't even care!"The older woman stomped back to the kitchen with Chloe following her, still throwing out a string of angry sentences."What would dad say?" Chloe blurted without thinking. Her mother's back stiffened and Chloe didn't even want to know what her face looked like. She wished she could suck what she just said right back into her throat. Her mother turned around and Chloe could see the hurt and the anger in her eyes. "Don't you dare mention him, do you hear me? You have no right to.""He was my father--""He's gone, Chloe. He tried his best, but he's gone," her mother struggled to keep the tears from spilling, "Y'know, I ought to get you married already. You're old enough and you'd probably be better off.""Mum, don't say that--""I don't want to hear it," Ms. Frazer finally quelled, wiping at her eyes, "We have a visitor coming."
Chloe frowned. "Who?""Mr. Harry Flynn." Her mother stated, averting the gloomy atmosphere with a swift change of subject, "The son of an old friend of mine. They moved here from Britain, too, before the stock market crashed. Sorta the same situation as us. She's dead now and I wasn't able to make it to the funeral since it was so far away--somewhere in Utah--but he kept in touch with me. Told me I was like a brief second mother to him through it all.""How come I've never met him?""Because he's usually traveling all over the place!" Her mother softly chuckled, "Don't ask me how that man gets the money to travel so much. Rumor has it that he's been to some parts in Canada for crying out loud."Chloe couldn't help raising an eyebrow. Traveling to Canada? In these times? It's gotta be a rumor, it has to be. What kind of rich asshole who could supposedly travel the world wouldn't help out his mother figure financially? "I think he's bloody rich and lying to you, mum.""Oh, stop assuming things. Anyway," Ms. Frazer continued, "Clean up the house, set the table, dress in something suitable, do something."And so Chloe did. She dusted the shelves, polished the table, mopped the floors, and cleared the mouse traps. She used the good, un-chipped tableware when setting the small, round wooden dining room table.Her mother was just setting the platter of mutton chops and the bowl of beef stew on the table when they heard a knock on the door. Chloe wiped her hands on the durable cotton of her green house dress and strode over to the front door.When she opened it, she was met with an oddly familiar face. A face that should worry her for some reason. The uneasy feeling in the pit of her stomach didn't leave when he spoke."You must be Chloe," Chloe immediately recognized the British accent. She also noticed a little scar on the left side of his upper lip as he smiled, "I'm Harry." "Well, don't you look familiar," Chloe voiced her thoughts. At this, the man's charming smile faltered a bit. He studied her for a bit in what Chloe thought to be in a cautious manner. His charm returned pretty quickly when Ms. Frazer came parading to the door."Harry!" She gave him a warm embrace, "Come on in before you catch a cold, dear. How've you been?"The two of them chattered as Harry hung up his coat. Chloe was filing through her thoughts and memories, trying to figure out where she has seen that face--that hair! She was sure she had seen those swept back locks of brown hair before. They stepped around the buckets that caught the melted snow from the roof that sometimes leaked throughout the day when the sun was out.Soon, the three of them were sitting comfortably at the dining room table. Chloe sat opposite from her mother and Harry, subtly observing the man who was reaching for the stew. Her mother gently slapped his hand away, chuckling. "Ah, Harry! You know we have to pray before digging in."He blinked at her as if he forgot what prayer even was before realization seemed to hit him. "Oh, right!" he grinned at her, "Take it away, your highness."As Ms. Frazer bowed her head and recited a lengthy prayer, Chloe saw his green eyes flick over to her. She regarded him as well and it was like the both of them were warning each other to back off while they can.
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
When they were finished eating, Chloe stood to take the dishes away to wash them. Like a skilled waitress, she balanced the plates and platters with her hands as she began to make her way to the kitchen. One trip to the kitchen is better than two trips."Let me help you with that," she heard Harry's smooth voice from behind her while she turned on the water. "Oh, you don't have to--""Chloe," her mother called from the dining room, "Let the gentleman help with the dishes."Chloe huffed and handed him a towel for drying and they began a decent process."How old are you?" he inquiried, breaking the silence."I'm twenty," she frowned at him, "You?"He shot her a charming smile, "Twenty-one."She shrugged and continued scrubbing a plate. The oven and the fireplace in the living room warmed up the house from the winter air. Chloe loved it when the house was cozy like this because it was rare to have the luxury of warmth during winter. It was comfortably quiet for a few more moments until he broke the silence once again."Earlier, you said that I looked familiar," he informed."Yeah?""We've never met before," Harry pointed out, "So how can I be familiar?""I don't know. Maybe a picture or something?""A picture of me when I was a child?" He pushed."No, it was you as a grown-up," she mused, trying to remember where she's seen him before.He remained quiet, staring at her. The dishes were done being cleaned and dried. They just stood there near the sink in thoughtful silence.Harry Flynn. It seemed like another word was usually paired with his name. A word that should frighten her. Rich? Corrupt? Wanted.Her eyes widened slowly as realization hit her. His face was on the newspaper earlier today. A newspaper that one of the customers from the diner was reading. It was a wanted ad for Harry Flynn, a ruthless criminal.Her heart hammered in her chest as she could feel his eyes still fixated on her. She didn't know what to do. Run? Hide?For some reason, she stayed still in place. The knives were on the counter beside the sink. If she could just--"I know you're scared." She flinched at his voice and glimpsed at him. He seemed guarded and a little desperate. Just a little. "You don't have to be. I have no reason to hurt you unless you give me one.""You're a criminal," was all that she could reply.He sucked in a breath. There was a tense pause before he began to stride out of the kitchen and into the dining room. Chloe anxiously followed him, not knowing what he was going to do."Ms. Frazer."Chloe's mother regarded him curiously. "Yes, Harry?"Harry ran his fingers through his hair, took a deep breath, and announced, "I want to marry your daughter." - They sat in the living room now. Chloe still gaped at the man sitting beside her, holding her hand and rubbing tiny circles on her knuckles. She couldn't speak because her throat was so dry with fear.Her mother seemed to be so joyous at the two of them. "What made you decide on Chloe, Harry?"Harry smiled fondly at Chloe. "Well, her beauty is obvious. But the way she sees the world is what drew me in. I want her to break free of these conditions and be my wife. I want her to see the world the way I see it."Was this happening? Why was he suddenly keen on the thought of marrying her? Why was her mother so okay with this? So many questions flitted in Chloe's head.Her mother dabbed at her eyes with a handkerchief, grinning widely. "Well, I guess she should start packing right away then."Chloe stood, staring at her mother incredulously. She felt Harry squeeze her hand and she averted her gawking to him. He gave her a look that she could only describe with two words: trust me.She looked around aimlessly. The house was falling apart. They were broke. She was miserable here and she knew it. She couldn't exactly pull Harry aside and question him. Not with her mother right there. He'd probably kill the both of them if they both knew his secret for all she knew.Her mother spoke. "Chloe, let me die knowing that you're safe and well with a possibly great future ahead. Harry would make a great husband. Your father would want this."The only thing stopping Chloe from leaving at this point was the fact that Harry Flynn was a wanted criminal. A criminal who has probably murdered people before. They could've tried to turn Harry in for what Chloe imagined was a large bounty. But who knows what kind of plan B that the man has in store if she rejects his hand in marriage.So she ambled up to her chilly room to pack her clothes, lost in thought. She went to the kitchen to "gather snacks" when she was actually slipping a knife into her pocket. She wasn't stupid. If he tries anything, she'll stab him in the eye.After a bunch of crying (mostly from her mother) and promises of return, Ms. Frazer finally released Chloe from the tight hug she had the young woman in. Harry promised the older woman that he'd take good care of her daughter. Chloe shivered at that.They lugged her suitcase in the trunk of his car before climbing in. He started the car and drove off. She didn't look back for the fear of crying.A few minutes passed and Chloe finally grew the sense to finally get some answers."Why are you doing this?" She demanded, her voice filled with barely concealed pain, "Marriage? I don't know if you know this, but we just met!""Oh, we're not getting married.""What? Then why take me away from my home?""Why not? "Answer me, you sick bastard."Harry sighed as he pulled over on the non-busy street. He turned to her. "Because you hated it there. I know you hated it there. Just admit it.""That gives you no right to just whisk me away. Now my mother thinks I'm off traveling with you and cooking for you and shining your goddamn shoes. As if it I'd ever do any of that.""You could've said no," Harry pointed out to her, ignoring her "unladylike" vocabulary, "But you didn't.""Because I didn't know what you were planning. I was scared.""Are you still scared now?""Of course I am. You're a criminal. A fugitive. You belong in jail. Now take me home."Harry rolled his eyes. "Yes, because that would be a brilliant idea. No offense, but I don't trust you. We just met after all," He smirked, "Just cooperate and you will have nothing to be worried about, sweetheart.""Like hell I'll cooperate--"Chloe's air was knocked right out of her lungs when the cool metal of the barrel of a gun was pressed against the temple of her head."I don't want to have to do this," Harry admonished, "And I don't think you want to die. Am I right?""Perfectly correct.""Good," he lowered the gun, an unstable look in his eyes "I'm sorry for taking you away from your home, but I couldn't risk it. I didn't know if you were going to call the cops on me or not. And I'm sorry for scaring you."Chloe played with her fingers."Are we even?" He wondered. With that, Chloe let out a loud laugh."Even? Far from it," Chloe snapped, "We're only even if you get a good punch to the face!"Harry tilted his head with a smirk. "Well, have at it, love."Chloe frowned as he ambled his head so that she can get a good hit on him. Barely with hesitation, her fist collided with his jaw, creating a loud smack. Massaging his jaw, he put the vehicle into drive and sped off. - They've been on the road for what seemed like hours. Eventually, Chloe had fallen asleep, her head lolled to the side. As she woke up, she wondered if he noticed that she was asleep. "Good morning, sunshine," he murmured, even though it was pitch black outside, "Had a nice sleep?""What time is it?" She yawned, ignoring his question and stretching her limbs."About one in the morning," he answered, his eyes never leaving the road, "There's a motel up ahead.""And how are you gonna check in without being recognized?" she questioned.He paused. "Do you know how to do a southern American accent?"Chloe smiled. She always liked to mock American accents as a child. "I don't know, darlin'. Do I?"He grinned. "Perfect."They pulled into the mostly deserted parking lot of the motel. It was in the middle of nowhere, but Harry told her that he wasn't taking any chances. He wore a bowler hat and glasses as an attempt to disguise himself. Chloe had to admit, she would've never guessed that he was a criminal in that get up.As they strolled through the doors, they saw that the clerk seemed to be swaying. He was half asleep."A room for two, please," Harry told him. The clerk was nodding off, his eyes rolling to the back of his head and falling shut."A room for two," Harry repeated louder. The clerk snapped awake. "For me n' my cousin, Darla. Let's get a move on.""Yeah, I'm pretty tired, hun," Chloe added in a southern American accent."Oh, sorry, mamn," the clerk nodded sleepily to Harry, "Sir," he nodded to Chloe. He reached back to get a random key and plopped it in Harry's waiting hand. Harry scowled at him for a moment as he immediately went to sleep. The clerk didn't even bother to ask if they wanted one large bed or two single beds. He shrugged.It didn't take long for them to find their room. Chloe didn't even bother to take off her shoes when she plopped onto the bed. Harry snickered at the sight of her. "You sure you don't want to take off your shoes? They're still wet from the snow, y'know."Chloe grumbled. Harry rolled his eyes and knelt at the foot of the bed, taking off her shoes for her. She tensed for a moment. "I don't fancy sleeping in wet sheets."She frowned. "Who says that you're sleeping in this bed?""Look around, love. There's only one bed."Chloe jerked up and saw that he was right. She was sitting on a queen size bed and Harry watched her, amused. She cringed. They couldn't have been given a room with two beds?"You know," Chloe smiled, clapping her hands together, "I think I'll just sleep on the floor.""Nonsense," Harry scoffed as she began shifting off the bed, "That floor is pretty dusty and gross.""I'll live.""What's the matter?" Harry smirked, "My dear wife doesn't want to sleep with her husband?""Shut up," she grimaced, "I'm not married to you.""Don't worry, I'll stay on my side of the bed," he assured her as he kicked off his shoes and unbuttoned his shirt, "If you think I'm not behaving myself, you can punch me again if you'd like." And with that, he took off his shirt and settled under the covers. That offer to punch him again seemed tempting.Chloe sighed and got under the covers on the other side of the bed, as far as she can get. When she was all settled, she caught his eyes shamelessly glued to her, his head resting on his arm. She huffed and turned around so that she wasn't facing him. "Good night, sweetheart," he muttered.Chloe shut her eyes and waited for sleep to take her.
|
10590243
|
Forget the Past
|
{
"Archive Warning": "Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings",
"Category": "M/M",
"Characters": "Jani Snellman, Markus Kaarlonen, Jari Salminen, Marko Saaresto, Olli Tukiainen, Jaska Mäkinen",
"Fandom": "Poets of the Fall",
"Language": "English",
"Rating": "Not Rated",
"author": "by FanFicReader01",
"chapters": "1/1",
"completed": "",
"published": "2017-04-10T00:00:00",
"words": "3,423",
"Additional Tags": "Drug Use, Drugs, Aftermath, Angst with a Happy Ending, Angst, Hurt/Comfort, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, drug addict jani, Suicidal Thoughts",
"Relationship": "Jani Snellman/Markus Kaarlonen",
"Character": null,
"Relationships": null,
"Series": null,
"Collections": null,
"Fandoms": null,
"Archive Warnings": null,
"Categories": null,
"Bookmarks": null,
"Chapters": null,
"Comments": null,
"Completed": null,
"Hits": null,
"Kudos": null,
"Published": null,
"Words": null,
"Updated": null
}
|
You'll be the wave that will gain
You'll be the water on stain
Fuck, did he feel bad. He was nauseous and his whole world was turning and groaning.The whole building seemed to fall down. Jani couldn’t stand on his feet anymore and fell onto his knees.Eventually he leaned on his hands as well so he wouldn’t completely fall over. His whole body couldn’t stop shaking. When he looked around him, the walls were bleeding their paints into flashy, sickening colors. Was he dreaming or hallucinating? Maybe both.Why did he took them again? He shouldn’t need them, but damn did it feel good to ride the high again.The former bassist eventually puked but he couldn’t see the difference between his own vomit and the floor anymore.This was getting pretty nasty. Literally and figuratively.
You'll be there calling my name
Jani, Jani
In the whole mess, in that horrible chaos, Jani spotted a figure.The figure, it was a man, seemed to walk towards the sick man.While everything was shaking and emitting weird noises and colors too bright for the eye and ear, the man seemed to be calm and constant. He didn’t change.The mysterious figure soothed the madman.Jani tried to reach for the person but he kept falling and falling into a seemingly never-ending pit.He could hear the other man call out for him.He was trying to reach for the bassist as well. But they never touched hands. They didn’t look each other in the eyes. Fuck, was it dark in Jani’s no man’s land.
You have a warrant to kill
All of my fears, then spill
‘Someone, please help me! Call an ambulance!’, the mysterious stranger shouted. The former musician himself, wasn’t conscious anymore by the time another person helped the stranger. By the time Jani woke up, he was hospitalized. In the beginning he was a bit confused by the darkness of the room. There was an annoying buzzing noise. He also had a peripheral IV placed on his left hand.It slightly itched. ‘How are you feeling?’, a voice called out for the patient.Snellman thought he would see a doctor or a nurse but it wasn’t. A bald man with a black leather jacket greeted him with a nod. He stood in the door opening but now neared.Jani didn’t recognize the stranger. Was he the person in his hallucinations? ‘I feel sick and hollow’, the drug addict admitted. He looked at his pale hands. Then he looked up again to look for the bald man’s eyes.They had a warm brownish color. They seemed kind. ‘I found you in that abandoned alleyway. If it wasn’t for my curious dog, it might’ve been too late’, the stranger informed him. The patient stared back at his blanket. ‘Maybe you shouldn’t have saved me’, he muttered.‘How can you say that?!’, the other man exclaimed. ‘Look at me! I’m filth from the street. I lost my job, got addicted and there’s no one who cares about me anyway. You could’ve just let me die there and no one would blink an eye at a junkie like me’, Jani broke down in tears. He hid his face with both hands. ‘But I care’, the other man simply replied.Jani dared to look between his fingers at his “rescuer”. Was this man serious? ‘How? Why? You don’t even know me!’, the comment came snappier than he meant to.‘I couldn’t walk by and pretend nothing happened! How could I?’, the man said. ‘And I think you should always try to help others. Even if you don’t know that person!’, he added. ‘Didn’t you think I had it coming? Like most junkies have it coming’, Snellman retorted, still not convinced.‘No! If you use drugs, I believe you always have some heavy troubles you want to escape from! I can’t blame them for resorting to it. I think it’s really sad that people have to resort to pills and stuff to escape their harsh reality. By the way, you can call me Markus’, Jani’s rescuer stated. ‘I-, I’m Jani’, the drug user mumbled.He felt a warm hand on his shoulder. He looked up to see Markus make eye contact again. ‘I’m glad you’re back to your senses, Jani. Nice to meet you finally’, he smiled.Jani managed a smile as well and nodded. ‘Yeah, I guess so.’ ‘So, what will you do after you get out of the hospital?’‘Go to a rehab center, that’s for sure. Don’t know how I’ll pay it though’, Jani didn’t want to sound desperate, but he truly felt that way. He started to sob and Markus reassuringly caressed the sick man’s back. ‘I’m afraid I can’t even pay the hospital bills right now. They better kick me out of here already. It will save everyone’s money.’ ‘Please, don’t say such things, Jani. I’m sure we can find another way!’, Markus encouraged.‘Why are you so sure? Why would you go such lengths for a junkie like me?’, Jani snorted in disbelief.‘Y’know, I had a friend. He had some severe trouble at home. He resorted to drugs too. I tried to stop him. I supported him even when he started taking those harmful pills. But in the end, I was too late. I don’t want you to have the same faith as my friend. I just hope I can talk some sense into you again. Why you shouldn’t give up on life and all’, Markus gave an intense look at the former bassist. ‘I know we barely know each other, but I’m starting to care about you.’ That was Markus and Jani’s very first meeting.
Into me all of your will
After Jani got out of the hospital, Markus decided to look after the former drug user.The man lived with his dog in a small flat not so far from the hospital.He offered Jani his bed like it was nothing. Markus said it was okay if he were the one to sleep on the couch. ‘Don’t worry about me. You’re the one who needs a good bed the most now.’ ‘I just got out of the hospital, y’know. I’m fine’, Jani countered.But Markus brushed it off and simply gave the other man his bed. Markus even went so far to pay Jani’s rehab. It left the ex-junkie full of guilt.‘You used to be a bassist, right?’, Markus asked him one day.‘Yes. Used to. I don’t even know if I’m still capable of playing the bass’, Jani muttered to him.‘I was thinking about giving you a second chance. To start anew in my band. In Marko’s band. After you’ve finished your rehab, I was thinking about you joining the band’, Markus explained at it made Jani’s eyes widen.A second chance as a musician? That couldn’t be real.And yet there he was. In a studio that wasn’t familiar to him. Although he was kind of glad he could completely start with a tabula rasa.Markus introduced Jani to his friends and bandmembers. The bassist was surprised he got accepted that easily. Marko, the lead singer of the band, was really compassionate. The two guitarists also said they were glad to finally have a bassist in their group. The drummer of the band said he was happy to see someone who lost their way, find it again. During Jani’s stay at Markus’ place, he grew very fond of the man who saved him that faithful day.They became very good friends. But Jani remained unsure about Markus’ true feelings towards him.He wondered if Markus only saw him as a very good friend or if there was more.Because he sure felt more than just platonic love.
Find me, find me
Find me, find me
Find me, find me
‘Where is Jani?’, Markus exclaimed when he opened the door of the studio.The two guitarists who were rehearsing, gave their keyboardist a questioning look. ‘Isn’t he supposed to be at your place?’ Olli asked. ‘I haven’t seen him here’, Jaska added.‘Does anyone know where he is?’, Markus’ face was full of worry. The man stormed to the small kitchen of the studio where he found the drummer. He got startled by Markus’ sudden appearance. ‘Have you seen Jani? He’s not at home’, the keyboardist almost shouted.‘Isn’t he jogging? Like he always does?’, Jari tried. Markus rubbed his jaw and muttered something. ‘Perhaps. But at this hour? It’s late.’‘Do you think he ran off?’, the drummer asked, already regretting his question. Markus threw an agitated look at his friend and snorted: ‘Jani would never do such thing. It’s true, he’s in and out of the house constantly. Like a cat. But he always comes back. I know you have your doubts about him and-’ ‘I’m just thinking about all the options, Markus. Y’know, he had a severe depression before you met him, right? Sometimes depression suddenly appears again and…’, Jari started to trail off and awkwardly stared at his feet. ‘I’m sorry. I don’t want to discourage you’, he stammered.Markus now shook his head and sighed: ‘You’re right, Jari. But I don’t want to lose him. What if he’s out there? All scared and alone?’ ‘Then go look for him!’, Jari stated.‘But where?’, Markus looked desperate. ‘Don’t ask me. You know the guy better than me. Want me to go with you?’, Jari suggested.‘T- thanks, Jari. I’d appreciate it’, he mumbled. The two musicians left the building and stepped into Markus’ car. The drummer drove for Markus was too hysterically to drive normally. They searched for Jani in the park behind the flats where he used to jog all the time whenever something was on his mind. He wasn’t there.They drove under the bridge. Most of the time you found some shifty people there. Jani wasn’t among them.Heck, Markus even looked for the bassist in the abandoned alleyway where he first me the guy. Once again, no Jani.Markus started to lose all hope when they started to drive back home. Jari suddenly tugged at the keyboardist sleeve. He then pointed in front of him. They were driving over the longest bridge of the city. ‘There! I see a person walking!’Markus knew it could be anyone but he recognized the figure in the distance. The hunched over walk, the way the person dragged his feet across the pavement. It was typically Jani’s whenever he felt… depressed. Markus swore his heart screamed to the sight of his friend walking there. ‘Stop the car!’, he now screamed and Jari tried his best not to abruptly brake.‘I have to drive to the parking first!’, the drummer stammered. Markus, however, wasn’t satisfied with that answer. ‘What if he is going to jump? I don’t have time for this!’, without thinking twice, the keyboardist jumped out of the car which was slowing down anyway. ‘Markus!’, Jari yelped, but he couldn’t do anything about it anymore. The musician slammed the door shut again and Jari had to continue driving. Jani was distancing himself more from Markus, probably unaware of the other man’s presence.His head was lowered and he doddered over the sidewalk. He eventually stood still at the railing of the bridge and he leant forward. He gasped when he saw the fast moving cars underneath him.His hands grasped tightly onto the cold steel of the railing.Fuck his sudden depression. Now he could finally end it. Which would also end the one-sided relationship he had with Markus.Well, he still wasn’t sure if the man loved him back or not but the answer would probably be a “no” anyway.Jani knew this act was going to be very selfish, but he couldn’t care less about the world anymore. Besides, he felt like a horrible failure. No one would need him anyway. The band only pretended to like him, probably. Markus wouldn’t have to look after him anymore.No, this was the right moment to end it all. He hoisted himself up, ready to climb over the railing. No cars were stopping because nobody would care about him anyway. Somewhere in the distance he could hear a very familiar voice yelling his name. It almost felt like the day he and Markus met. His mind was clouded back then. And now his mind was again clouded with dark thoughts.‘Jani! Jani! Stop what you’re doing! Get the fuck away from there!’But the bassist was stubborn and climbed over the fence already. He started to feel nauseous as he looked down. He was standing still while everything underneath him was in full motion.He also got startled by some car honks. ‘Jani!’, then the ex- drug addict dared to look up.Markus was approaching him. He seemed to run in slow-motion. What was he doing here? Wasn’t he supposed to be home? Wasn’t he going to the studio to rehearse with his real friends? Apparently not. The keyboardist sprinted the last few meters and without hesitation he grabbed Jani by the shoulders so he wouldn’t fall. ‘Just what the fuck do you think you’re doing? Huh? Could tell me, please?!’, Markus sounded all angry and sad at the same time. It was written all over his face.Jani wanted to answer it but tears prevented him from doing that. All he could blabber was: ‘I- I dunno, Markus. I- I’m sorry’A firm breeze tried to take a hold of the bassist but Markus was stronger. He grabbed Jani’s body even tighter to him. With some effort he pulled the man over the railing so he was standing on the steady ground again.That’s when Jani collapsed to the ground. His knees too weak to carry him. Markus knelt beside him. ‘I-, I’m a failure once again, Markus’, the man whimpered.‘No, you’re not. Depression… it just hits you and there’s not much you could do about it. So don’t blame this on yourself, Jani. Please, I beg you’, Markus replied.But Jani kept crying. His body shuddered heavily because of it. Kapu felt heartbroken to see his friend like this. He wanted to do something about it.Then Markus let go of the crying musician, only to embrace him even more now and actually kiss Jani.He kissed him fully on the lips. It was quite passionate. Markus was kissing the hell out of him and hopefully kissed the man’s sorrow away as well.It did stop Jani from crying. The man’s eyes widened in surprise. He surely felt his heart skip a beat.Was Markus really…? ‘I love you, Jani. Maybe more than you know. Damn it, I love you so much. I wouldn’t let you go like that. I wouldn’t let you slip away from me a second time!’ Jani hesitatingly wrapped his arms around Kapu too now. He started to feel lightheaded.Hopefully he wasn’t going to pass out on the other man. The two men parted a little so they could each other in the eye.‘I-, Markus… I don’t know what to say. I mean, I-, I feel the s- same way but I never thought you’d fall in love with a junkie’, Jani expressed his surprise. ‘Ex-junkie. You’re no longer the man I found on that day’, Markus exclaimed, pressing Jani closer to him again. ‘We’ll make it somehow. Together. I’m sure of it. You only have to believe’, Markus whispered and Jani nodded.Markus was right. Markus was always right.
My Love, my love
My Love, my love
You'll be the essence of fire
You'll take hold of my desire
You'll make me bold and inspire
Jani didn’t really thought he had it in him to change that much. But he did and here he was.The rehab was completely over (he had to return for a while though) and he took pills against his depressions.So the bandmembers threw him a little party to celebrate the bassist’s success.After the party he and Markus returned home. Their home. Now that Jani finally had a steady income again, he could pay the rent too. ‘Once again, I’d like to out my eternal gratitude’, Jani expressed when the two of them laid in bed together. ‘Thank you, but you don’t have to say that in an apologizing tone’, Markus mumbled.‘But really. Without you, I wouldn’t know what to do, honestly! If it wasn’t for you then… then I’d be dead by now’, Jani stammered. Markus now rolled on his side to face the bassist.‘Really, thank you, thank you!’, he added.Markus replied: ‘But the biggest kudo’s go to you, Jani. It was you who made it happen after all. That wasn’t me but purely you. Of course, I’m very honored to be the one who inspired you to change. In the end, I only pushed you in the right way. Nothing else.’ ‘I know. I can hardly believe it, though’, Jani started to cry tears of joy and his partner cradled him, stroking his back in a hushing way.
Know me, know me
Markus knew Jani more than the bassist knew himself sometimes.The guy recognized it when he could calm Jani down and when not. When the other man was too frustrated or too sad to accept any help. Then Kapu would just back off and give him some breathing space. But Markus also understood when Jani was just pretending and he actually craved some attention.He simply knew. Kapu also knew about the other man’s body. He had discovered all the secret weak and sweet spots of the bassist. He knew where his touch tickled and where his touch tingled and excited.For Markus, Jani was like an open book.And together with the keyboardist Jani started to read himself again. To love himself and find himself again. After all, he had been a lost sheep and Markus helped him to find the right path again.
You'll be the eye of the storm
You'll be the letters of warm
When Jani got rescued that day, Markus felt like the eye of the storm. Standing in the middle of it. being the only steady and real thing in the otherwise chaotic world around Jani.And sometimes, Markus still felt like the eye of the storm.The storm of his feelings that was. His feelings for Markus happened like a storm. He could feel it in the air, taste it on his lips, feel it mostly in his heart.And then, the storm broke out and Jani felt like he was catapulted in the air and thrown from side to side by the strong winds. He was hopelessly in love. He didn’t know what to do with those feelings.But now he did. Now that Markus confessed his equal love to the bassist. He still didn’t wasn’t sure how to completely express his love for the other man. He wasn’t that good with flirtation and such lovey-dovey things. But Markus apparently was. He liked to flirt with the other man, tease him a little.Jani mirrored the other man’s actions and together they dived into a loving relationship.
You’ll be the dreams that I’ve torn
Markus was everything Jani thought was impossible.Back when he was a drug addict, he didn’t thought true happiness existed. He deemed love to be a big and ugly lie. An unachievable goal. Jani didn’t thought there would be real people that would love him.He saw himself as a mistake of mother nature who didn’t deserve love or any kind of affection. He felt like he wasn’t needed in this world. And he felt so lonely and miserable, that he hoped the drugs could help him.But they only helped him for a short period of time. After they’d worn out, he would feel just as shitty as before the pills and needles. And his shitty life almost met an end with his last overdose, but then Markus came along and changed everything.He made Jani believe again. He showed Jani the love and friendship he never had. He showed him that he was worth someone’s time and attention.Jani had given up on his seemingly unreachable dreams. He had torn them like paper but Markus had glued them together again. He had repaired them and made the words written on it, a reality.
Find me inside
The calm of the storm
Where lovers decide what might come with the dawn
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10515429
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From the Ground Up
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{
"Archive Warning": "Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings",
"Category": "F/M",
"Characters": "Link (Legend of Zelda), Zelda (Legend of Zelda), Mipha (Legend of Zelda), Revali (Legend of Zelda), Teba (Legend of Zelda), Kass (Legend of Zelda), Daruk (Legend of Zelda), Yunobo (Legend of Zelda), Riju (Legend of Zelda), Urbosa (Legend of Zelda)",
"Fandom": null,
"Language": "English",
"Rating": "Teen And Up Audiences",
"author": "by fioreofthemarch",
"chapters": "24/24",
"completed": "2017-11-02",
"published": "2017-04-01T00:00:00",
"words": "249,172",
"Additional Tags": "Slow Burn, Rebuilding Hyrule, zelink, Fight Scenes, Politics, lore heavy, Plot focused, minor OCs - Freeform, lots of worldbuilding, Minor Sexual themes, non-explicit violence, Cameos",
"Relationship": "Link/Zelda (Legend of Zelda)",
"Character": null,
"Relationships": null,
"Series": "Champions and Beasts",
"Collections": null,
"Fandoms": "The Legend of Zelda: Breath of the Wild, The Legend of Zelda & Related Fandoms",
"Archive Warnings": null,
"Categories": null,
"Bookmarks": null,
"Chapters": null,
"Comments": null,
"Completed": null,
"Hits": null,
"Kudos": null,
"Published": null,
"Words": null,
"Updated": null
}
|
Part One: Education
Link. Please, hurry.
That was the name she gave him; that was the mission she assigned him.In the year that followed, battling Blight and learning to live again, Link carried her voice with him. He kept it close, treasured it, like a shell from the beach, contours and chips doled out by time, and in quiet moments he would seek it out and bring it forth from the crevices he’d made in himself. He’d find it and make it his compass. When the ground at his feet fell away, when rains and snow sloughed down, when thunder shook him and wind rattled his bones -- he returned to it. Her voice and her face. Photos on a strange slate. Places where they had once been. All of it, but most of all her voice. It kept him functional, alive.But he wasn’t ready to hear it. Not the real thing. It was a blow he could not brace for, his silence not strong enough of a shield. Because, Goddesses, she was real, so real, where everything else was just a memory or a dream.And when she turned, when she smiled, when she spoke, he froze.When she asked the question, the first question, he fell silent.
Do you really remember me?
And he had nothing to say in return.In the far west the Sun had almost set, and the sapphire-lit Sheikah Towers dotted across Hyrule were shining like stars. From the top of Central Tower the entire kingdom was visible; from Death Mountain in the north, pulsating with heat, to Gerudo Desert in the south, where a gargantuan sandstorm raged. In the west, sitting silently at the edge of Hyrule Field, was Hyrule Castle, now little more than an empty shell. Flanked by the five monolithic columns and seeping with the remaining pools of Malice, it was its own blight on the landscape. The presence of the gurgling purple ooze made one thing clear: sealed though he may be, Ganon's corruption still marred the land.Zelda watched the tableau of Hyrule before her from the open platform of Central Tower. The wind caught her hair, faintly cold now that the warm light of sunset was waning. It seemed it had been dusk for hours now and in moments like these, Princess Zelda could not tell dream from waking. Sunlight burned brighter and chills crept deeper under her skin now that she had physical form again after a lifetime trapped as a spirit of light within the Castle.But you are here, Zelda told her. You are alive.She felt she could not rest. She had to keep moving or else lose her grip on what was real and true. The moment the light of Central Tower rounded over the horizon, she had never felt more determined.“To the top,” she had said. “Promptly now. Before sundown.”“Are you sure?” Link had asked, peering up at the lofty Shiekah Tower. It was all he said; his eyes said the rest, in that strangely expressive way that they did now."I must see what remains of this kingdom. Where else but this tower?”He’d handed her the Sheikah Slate and said, “You can teleport to the top.”To that she had naively declined. Link need not fear for her, not after what they’d been through only days prior, and with her body back Zelda was determined to experience as much that was new to her as she could. Hand over hand, foothold to foothold, she and Link began to climb.An hour later, Zelda collapsed in an exhausted heap onto the cool stone of the tower platform. Every muscle in her body ached and shook and her vision was blurred from the sheer strain. She rolled onto her back, and met Link's eyes ruefully when he appeared above her, a hand extended to help her up."I'm now glad," she had said through panting breaths. "That it was you and not me activating all these, these…” she gestured weakly around them, “...these grand old things."Link had flashed her a wry smile. "No problem, Princess," he’d said, handing her his waterskin, and she’d been so flushed and embarrassed at her dismal physical display that she’d refused to take it at first, and only relented when her pants turned into coughsNo problem, Zelda thought glumly as she now gazed down on Hyrule Field. Link’s quest to destroy Ganon had taken him almost a year, and not once had it seemed like no problem, at least not from her vantage point. Zelda had watched over him as best as she could, but her pilgrimage in Hyrule Castle had placed her in a state of being that felt somewhat like being submerged, enveloped by the immensity of her struggle against that foul beast. Already her memories of those one hundred years were fading. Perhaps it was for the best. But to Link, Zelda pondered, it had been no time at all. One single year alive, against her one hundred and seventeen. Was it possible that he… that he had forgotten their past? It was hard to tell. He said so little, and his eyes, expressive as they were, did not hold conversation.He was standing guard behind her, his Master Sword and Hylian shield at his back, in the unlikely event that anything sinister could reach them atop Central Tower. When Zelda had told him he didn’t have to do that anymore, all he’d done was shrug and call it his instinct.Zelda’s instincts, damn them, told her to go back to her Castle. They told her to sit in the seat that was her father's, and take on the crown he left for her. That was the most obvious course of action, wasn’t it?Yet, the thought of such a thing, and the thought of following in his footsteps...No. No, no, no. It made her chest seize, her heart and hands wring. Who would want her, a forgotten girl with no great qualities of her own, to be Queen?But where could she go now? Zelda thought of Link, standing watch somewhere on the tower platform. Who would she go with?The last rays of sun slipped beneath the western mountains of the Tabantha Frontier, and Hyrule was blanketed in darkness. It was a moonless night: dark, and lonely, and cold. There was nothing more to see from the tower."Well, judging by my performance earlier, I don't think we’re in a position to climb down until sunrise," Zelda announced, returning to the terminal at the centre of the tower platform where she had left her things. Link turned his head slightly to the side, a slender ear cocked in her direction. With a nod, he left his post and joined her, coaxing up a small fire by the terminal for their dinner: Roasted mushrooms again. Link had used all his arrows in his fight against Ganon, and neither Link nor Zelda were comfortable passing through towns yet to restock their supplies, so hunting was out of the questionZelda sat by the fire, taking a mushroom skewer in hand, and looked up to see that Link had re-assumed his lookout. His whole body was tense, his muscles knotted as if in preparation for an ambush."Afraid of flying moblins?" she teased, wishing Link would relax. His caution was doing nothing to ease her nerves.She saw him smile slightly, and with a rare lightness he said, "I've heard rumours of winged Lizalfos before.”Zelda snorted, embarrassing herself. She felt her cheeks go red. Don’t be a fool, it’s just Link, she told herself, feeling no better. After another few minutes, Link must have felt that it was safe, for he turned and sat down around their little camp at last, grabbing a few skewers of now charred mushrooms to eat."You really don't need to worry,” Zelda recommenced. “I'm sure that anything that manages to climb up here will be just as tired as I was. I saw nothing in the west anyway, and all that’s in the east are stables and..." her voice trailed off as she realised she was rambling. "And the wetlands of Lanayru…."Link didn't look up from his meal, and Zelda felt a moment of clarity. "You were looking towards Zora's Domain, weren't you?"That made him pause. He swallowed and briefly met her eyes before looking away.“You mentioned it yesterday.”“There are people there who might remember me. King Dorephan. Sidon. Even some of the royal court. I think… Kiahto was their historian?”“Jiahto,” Link corrected, to Zelda’s shock.“You met him?”“Met lots of people.”“Regardless, Divine Beast Vah Ruta is still there. I’d like to check on her, to ensure she is secure. I feel it’s the least we could do.”Link considered this, or at least seemed to be considering this. He finished a fourth mushroom skewer, added a small log to the fire and quietly said,“What about Kakariko?”“No.”“Lady Impa–”“Not yet,” Zelda’s breath hitched. “I’m sorry just… not yet.”The defiance in Zelda seemed to have no source. It came suddenly and naturally, a foregone conclusion. How could she look the Sheikah in the eye after how badly she had failed them? Were their lives not better, freer, without needing to be in her service?Link didn’t challenge this, only started on his fifth skewer with a slight frown. Zelda returned to the source of their conversation, eager to move on.“You seem apprehensive about Zora’s Domain,” she said diplomatically. Again, as he had before nearly every time he spoke, Link paused to choose his words. "It's a dangerous path," he said. "Dunno how to… get you there. Safely."Zelda sighed. "I’m not helpless.”“I know, it’s just–”“While I appreciate your assistance—““I’m not used to—““I told you I can manage on my own.""Can you?" Link shot back. His intensity sent a jolt through Zelda’s spine.His eyes met hers. Zelda’s vision swam, her eyes stinging. Link’s cheeks brightened with regret."Princess--" he began."Don't.”"I shouldn’t have said--""Don’t!" Zelda rubbed the water from her eyes. “Please.”Silence fell, save for the whistle of the wind through the tower lookout. The pair spoke not another word as they ate, doused their fire, and retired to their bedrolls, and yet Zelda simmered with rage for what little remained of the evening. She lay seething, fighting the memory that came back to her with a vengeful clarity.They had just left Hyrule Castle a few days prior, carrying what little they could take from the ruins. Link directed them through Central Hyrule, avoiding the paths and stables to keep them both out of sight. For a day or so they moved slowly across Hyrule Field while Zelda adjusted to mundane but now novel rituals of eating, sleeping and speaking. Those first hours after the Calamity’s defeat were fragmented and jarring, characterised by long blackouts and a lingering sense of disconnection. She would be sitting atop her horse, following slowly behind Link, and then next she would be by the fire gazing unblinkingly at the flames, and then next lying in her bedroll, waiting restless for sleep to take her. To his credit, the knight did not overwhelm her with prodding questions about her wellbeing, but his silence did little to help her feel welcome.It wasn’t until the second day that Zelda stumbled. Her appetite was yet to fully come back, and the lack of food made her weary. After a day's ride towards Central Tower under the bright late-summer sun -- little more than a handful of mushrooms and some thin strips of cured meat to keep her going -- the exhaustion of living finally caught up with her. Absent-mindedly she lead her horse off the rough gravel trail, seemingly quiet enough for Link not to notice. The sun was in her eyes, the afternoon breeze battering her ears, and the sounds and sights of the darkness that had enveloped her for so long came rushing back like a wave to shore. It was too much. It was too bright. Zelda shrieked, and then just like that – she fell.Whatever had happened, she woke by the fire again, her left arm throbbing. The elbow was bruised, and had been braced with some deftly tied bandages.That was almost a day ago now, and still every mention of Zelda's well-being or Link's duty as her guard would cause them both to stiffen and close up. Link refused to move on at least until he was sure Zelda had regained her strength, and Zelda, admittedly, refused to talk about it.This was the first time he'd lashed out though. And the first time she’d lashed back.The last embers of the fire were sputtering out. Zelda wanted to sleep – properly – yet the void of night around her threatened to bring cruel nightmares and sleepless hours. Restless, and still a little upset, she spoke into the darkness.“You can leave me, Link, any time you want.”Light as the wind passing through the tower, the darkness spoke back.“Where would I go?”Morning found them silently breaking their fast with strips of cured meat – the last they had remaining. It was a cool morning, overcast, the land decorated with the mist of summer showers.Zelda peered over at Link, sitting with his legs dangling over the tower edge. She sat a little way back, legs crossed, not quite as brave as he.Their eyes met for a moment, and as if anticipating the other’s lingering discontent, both spoke: “I’m sorry.”“Thank you, but there is no need,” Zelda replied. “It was my fault. I shouldn’t have yelled.”“It’s alright, it didn’t hurt,” Link said. Was that a smile on his face? Zelda could hardly believe it. It made him shine, bright like the sun haloing his hair. He looked away, fumbling with his wrist guard. “I can’t imagine what it’s been like for you, these past few days.”“Nor can I imagine what this past year has been like for you. But… I’m sure we will figure it out.”Together? She wanted to ask. It seemed their current arrangement would continue – but for how long, and to what end were the real questions, and Zelda was afraid of the answers.Their breakfast done, Link fetched their packs, helping Zelda strap hers to her back. “I’m ready to go when you are, Princess,” he said.Zelda took one last look over the landscape before they climbed down the tower. Hyrule Field gave way to the mountains beyond, the rivers and ponds glistening in shimmering reds and ambers as the sun peeked out over the eastern horizon, all of it bearing the scars of the Calamity. To the south she saw that the sandstorm was even greater in size. Wherever Zelda looked, not a soul was in sight. Hyrule was still asleep.But soon, like her, like the both of them, it would need to stir.Zelda carefully took hold of wiry mesh that covered the sides of Central Tower, and began the descent.The decided they would travel first to Zora’s Domain to enact a tri-pronged plan: pay respects to King Dorephan, assert her presence in the world, and check on Divine Beast Vah Ruta. It seemed that her powers, while diminished, were still present. She knew that much by the muted gold mark on her hand, in the shape of three triangles. If there was a way to put this sealing power to use, then she would find it.“I can take you to Kakariko Village, as well,” Link reiterated, pointing to the hidden little town on the map in the Sheikah Slate. “It’d only be a day’s travel.”Zelda shivered. “One thing at a time,” she told him, trying her best to feel the words as she spoke them, and he didn’t ask about it again after that.Regardless of where, both Link and Zelda wished to reach shelter and civilisation before too long. Link boarded their horses at the Wetlands Stable in Lanayru, and led them on a shortcut through through the Lanayru Wetlands. They would rejoin the road at the mouth of the Zora River, and make the winding climb up to the sheltered Zora’s Domain. To both Link and Zelda's relief, their travels to the Domain were relatively easy-going; they met little interference beyond a fallen log or some particularly slippery mud."Must be the cold air," Zelda mused, talking more to herself than Link. "It’ll be Summer’s End soon, you can see the way the leaves are changing. I suppose it would make sense if creatures not adapted to the cooler weather would adopt a hibernation cycle.""Calamity Ganon," Link said suddenly. He'd been so quiet, so careful in even his movements that sometimes Zelda simply forgot he was there."Pardon?""He's dead. So there's not as many monsters.""Right. Of course. That would be a more apt explanation," Zelda wrapped her arms around herself. "It's still a bit chilly.""Are you cold, Princess?”"No, Link, thank you," Zelda answered. "And… just Zelda will do. Princess doesn’t sound right, anymore."“As you say, Prin– uh, Zelda.”At least things are civil, Zelda thought with an inward sigh, if a little awkward.Sometimes in the way Link spoke to her, or looked at her, it seemed that he saw only a stranger. While the hundred year vigil had dulled Zelda’s own memories, at least she had them at all. In conversations they'd had, Link explained that his memories were more fragmented, at best.And there were other changes too. Small things at first. Mannerisms that she had remembered differently, words here and there that she had never heard him use, a look in his eye that seemed changed.She tried to push down the thoughts. He was alive. He’d come back to her. That had to be all that mattered.They were still a day or so from Zora’s Domain, and had progressed halfway through the Lanayru wetlands. Finding small refuge in the Goponga Village Ruins, they built their camp and made their fire, settling against the weathered stone. Link borrowed the Sheikah Slate from Zelda to materialise a silver trident from its inventory -- one embellished with emeralds and pearls. He waded out into the low waters, focused hard on the colourful fish that swam lazily past, and held the trident balanced to strike. There was a sudden splash, and not a minute later Link returned to their camp with wet boots and two fat Hylian Bass. Zelda caught a secretive, proud smile on his face as he approached. Another instinct, Zelda realised. Another skill that need not be remembered.Perhaps now is a good time to help him, she thought, to remind him of the life he once had."You carry the Lightscale Trident?" Zelda asked.Link's brows furrowed, and he did not answer. Around them a light rain began to fall.“It’s a fine weapon,” Zelda continued, feeling foolish. Perhaps this was not the best place to start. “There’s no benefit letting it go unutilised.”Link nodded silently, his attention still focused on the bass. He cleaned the fish with a pointed Gerudo dagger, skewered the meat, and held them out over the fire.“Did you want to talk about it?” Zelda pressed. “About before.”Link’s eyes snapped up to meet hers, his face guarded. “...before?”Zelda gulped. There was no way around it. "Before the Calamity."Link was quiet for a long time then, and Zelda wondered if he'd even heard her. The fish were finished on the fire; Link held one out for her and they ate in silence. When he was done, he finally spoke."I don't know what to ask.""We can start small. Your Knighthood, the Kingdom, your death--""Start small?" Link laughed nervously."Uh— well, maybe not—," Zelda spluttered. The sound of his laughter had completely thrown her, and for a second she couldn't help but laugh along with him."My death," Link said. "It's not exactly-""-a small start, no" Zelda sighed, resting a hand against her face. "I'm sorry, I’m not much help.."Link shrugged. "I don't mind.”The rain began to heap down then, and so they ducked under a ruined thatch roof, the decaying grass and hay only just enough to keep them dry. Link scrambled to gather up their belongings, and Zelda watched with dismay as their campfire was reduced to fizzling embers. There was no choice but to sit on their bedrolls and shiver as they waited out the storm. An uneasy silence fell over them then, punctuated only by Zelda's idle musings on the history of Zora's Domain."Legend tells that Lady Ruta was engaged to a Hylian, and some theorise it could have been the Hero of Legend himself. But you know it seems so unlikely to me. Zora traditions are so strict. And even if it were true, I suppose it never went anywhere. Can you imagine the scandal? A Zora Princess, and a Hylian–" She was too late to catch herself, remembering at the last second how closely the story mirrored Link's. She looked over and saw him gazing with an empty expression at the waters beyond the ruins, hugging his knees to his chest. If he was crestfallen she couldn't know."I'm sorry, Link," she apologized. He shot her a weak, fading smile.“It’s okay,” He murmured.Zelda cursed her own carelessness. Has he had even a single happy moment, she wondered, since they named him my Champion? Since I had him laid in that Shrine?Just as Zelda resigned to another tense evening together, Link asked, "Did you know her well?"Zelda felt a surge of pain in her chest."I know she cared about you," she answered. I know she loved you. "Is this what you want to talk about?"Link gave a little nod, though he didn't seem to relax.Zelda tried to tell him everything that she could, though in truth she had never really spoken to Princess Mipha outside of their work with Ruta and the other Champions."She…she loved that trident. No, that's a silly way to put it. She excelled with it, wielding the Lightscale Trident as you do now. The Zora said she was one of their most skilled fighters, as well as being their princess. But I think she never wanted to fight. She loved Ruta, she loved learning about her, but she considered her use against Ganon a last resort, I think. She told me how Ruta could be used to stabilise the weather in Lanayru. She wanted to make Hyrule safer, for all of us."Everything ached, so rich that Princess Zelda almost wanted to savour it. This lucidity had brought with it grief, and she tasted salt tears on her lips.There was a blossom of warmth on her shoulder; it was Link, his hand on her arm to calm her. In his eyes were tears too, though he quickly drew his hand away and wiped his eyes dry. They sat together a long while like this, shoulder to shoulder, saying nothing. Zelda had forgotten what it was like -- gentleness, compassion, the presence and understanding of another. Fighting for her own composure, Zelda took a deep breath and continued to speak."I may not have known her very well. But Hyrule feels her loss, she was a rare pillar of light -- they all were -- and Mipha most of all would have been much needed now."After it all, Link simply nodded. The rain had stopped. Without a word, he hopped to his feet and dusted himself off. He offered a hand to Zelda, and she took it with some hesitation."Thank you," he said after he pulled her up. "Really.""It's nothing," Zelda began, dizzy from all of her thoughts. "Consider it my apology, for the way I've been lately."Link smiled. "You don’t need to apologise. It wasn't unexpected.""What does that mean?""I remember your temper.""It's not a temper!"Link raised his hands and backed away. "Well, I do have a pretty good memory.”"No you don't!" She gave him a playful hit on the shoulder."Hey!" Link laughed, jotling away from her. “That wasn’t very Princess-like.”“It wasn’t? What about this?!” Zelda lashed another swipe out towards his other shoulder, but Link dodged cleanly.“Woah - nearly!” He began to bounce on his feet, suddenly revitalised by this little game. “I haven’t had a sparring partner in ages.”“No - this is absurd!” Zelda said, but tried again anyway. Link leapt backwards to avoid her swipe, hoping down towards the banks of the wetland.“You’ll catch me eventually!” he laughed.They stared at each other intently for just a moment, and then Link broke into a run. Link fled along along the bank, boots splashing in the shallow water with Zelda in pursuit. She nearly caught him, but Link spun on his heel and turned to sprint across one of the submerged log bridges that snaked their way through the wetlands. Zelda bounded after him, exhilarated to feel the rush of cold air in her lungs and the pounding of blood through her veins. It made her feel young, like a child. Link seemed to slip on some of the logs, momentarily halted, and Zelda took full advantage of the opportunity. She leapt to tag him on the shoulder and raced past him, shouting “Your turn!”Link cried out in alarm, but Zelda kept running. She fled across to the neighbouring island, and saw over her shoulder that Link was gaining on her, smiling wide as he chased her. She never wanted to stop running; never wanted to stop feeling as alive as she did at this moment. The sun had well set, but the silvery light from the moon filtering past the dispersing clouds above reflected brilliantly off the shallow waters. In the low light, another one of the log bridges was visible, and Zelda made to cross it. Sliding down the back, she leapt onto the bridge, splashing into the cool waters.And that was when she saw it. The shock seized her limbs and she fell forwards, prone and half submerged in the low water as she gazed up at the gargantuan before her.The Guardian was spilled out across the logs, half of its mechanical legs twisted underneath it, and the other half missing entirely. Under the moonlight, its dark granite body almost seemed blue, and its singular cyclops eye gazed unblinkingly in her direction. It did not move, but it seemed alive. No, it was alive. It had to be. They all were, raining fire and destruction down on her home, on Hyrule.Zelda shrieked, scrambling backwards but unable to get any purchase on the mud and the logs. Her head swam, the sights and sounds coming back as they had the day she’d fallen from her horse.
Father help me. Mother help me. It’s too bright. I can’t help him. I can’t hold him. I can’t--
Instinct took over. Zelda raised her right hand, and just as she unleashed a surge of energy towards the Guardian, her appointed knight came into view.With fervour, Link snapped another bundle of twigs and placed them in the growing fire. His eyes never left his work. For this, Zelda was glad. One glance from him and she’d be crying all over again.He’d found her lying in the swampy waters, in near hysterics. Pulling her to her feet, Link all-but carried her back to their camp. She had wept and shook the entire way, only calming once he set her down on her bedroll, and explained pointedly that the Guardian she had found was dead - as were all of them.“How can you be sure?” Zelda had demanded.“I remember killing it,” Link had said tersely. "And many others."There had been fear in his voice, of all things, and an urgency that almost sounded like panic. He placed his cloak around her and for a moment looked her directly in the eye. Scrutinising. Assessing. Maybe wondering what in Hylia’s name was wrong with her.Instead he’d asked, “Are you okay?”Zelda nodded, still shivering.At this, he’d said no more and had begun gathering wood for a fire.Now the fire was lit and burning brightly. Zelda shuffled closer for warmth. Her tears were dried now, as were her clothes. She rubbed her eyes, balling her fists tight out of shame. So much for being able to manage herself.Link approached. “Fire’s set. Maybe let’s just get some sleep.” Zelda nodded and settled into her bedroll. There was nothing more to say.When the daylight came, Zelda permitted herself to look back towards where the Guardian lay. Whatever she had done to it, she had used enough force to blast its husk almost thirty feet backwards and tear off its remaining legs. No matter what Link said, the Guardian was well and truly dead now. They trudged in silence through the remaining stretch of wetlands, and by evenfall were within close distance of Zora’s Domain.In the rapidly-fading light, the shadow of Vah Ruta spanned across the valley. As they made their way through Luto’s Crossing, Zelda looked skyward. To see inside a Divine Beast once more would be incredible, she thought, unable to fathom it. She caught a glimpse of a navy-scaled Zora atop the wide plateau where Vah Ruta stood, and felt her quiet elation melt like summer snow. The thought of meeting with the Zoras, and of discussing the future of Hyrule, filled her with dread where she had for so long expected to feel anticipation. But Vah Ruta needed her. The Beast had not been entirely freed of the Malice, nor had any of the other three. Still, Zelda felt a paralyzing fear as she gazed up at the otherworldly swirls on stone of the Divine Beast’s body. She hoped that with the Calamity past and Ganon gone, most of the chaos was past as well.When Zelda looked back at the plateau, the navy Zora was gone, and from the tall plateau Zelda could hear distant shouting. It seemed to grow louder and more frantic the longer she stared up at the Divine Beast. She stopped, gripping the rails of the crossing and craning her neck in an attempt to catch a glimpse of the commotion. Link had stopped beside her and he too was gazing up at the Beast, his face twisted with concern and confusion.“Something’s happening up there. Something's wrong,” Zelda said. Link nodded in agreement.And then the shouting stopped, drowned out by a booming shriek that filled the valley surrounding the Zora River. Zelda recognised it immediately, her skin prickling, the rumble resonating through her body; the trumpeting of a divine elephant. Vah Ruta! Link pushed off from the rails and hurried further along the crossing, a palm outstretched to beckon for Zelda to follow. If he had been anyone else, she might have hesitated, but instead she swallowed her fear and took his hand.As they raced together towards Zora’s Domain, Zelda could not strike the sound of that roar from her mind. It was a warning, an omen, one that they could not ignore. They were alive, yes, and together for now. Calamity Ganon had been defeated, but that was not the end of that.Divine Beast Vah Ruta roared again, the whole valley shuddering in response, and Zelda knew what it meant. Together or apart, Princess and Knight or no one at all, their work was not done, and the world was full of chaos still.
Elsewhere…
As a child growing up in Karusa Valley, Chancellor Leilo’s instructors had told him that living in the desert instils peace in the soul. Peace with the harsh land; peace with one's limits; peace with oneself.Yet peace eluded him, no matter where he went. Beyond the threshold of his shanty in Gerudo Tower Valley, the first sounds of the late-summer sandstorm had begun to fill air. The rising winds rattled the shutters and sent tremors rippling through his hut, despite its construction into the wind-hewn cliff face. Storms like these would bring more than sand and dust in the coming months; Hyrule had not endured a harsh Winter in some years, and Chancellor Leilo could feel the oncoming darkness in his bones.More like the darkness is already here, he mused, ever since the defeat of Master Kohga at the hands of that Hylian.The one they called Champion; the one carrying the Sheikah Slate. Whispers on the trails and through the towns spoke of Kohga’s de-throning as though it were legend. No two Yiga able to agree on just how his valiant death occurred. Some swore the Hylian boy snuck into the Master’s chamber and poured an odourless poison onto his pillow, before sneaking off into the night. Others spoke of a great battle between the two, and how the Hylian had used sorcery to stop time. Others were convinced it was a ruse, that Kohga had staged his death--to throw the boy off his guard--and would later return to them, victorious against the so-called Champion.Chancellor Leilo suspected that none of these rumours were correct, though he had no wish to discover the truth. Havoc had ruled the Yiga in the months since Kohga’s disappearance; for without a Master, the vacuum at the center of their clan threatened to swallow them whole.Another gust sent the shutter battering against the window panes, and Leilo nearly wanted to cover his ears to drown out the incessant sound. Restless, he rose from his small writing desk and hobbled over to the shanty door. With weak fingers he pried it open, and called for his assistant Inglis, who was outside preparing their supper. The spry, Akkalan boy, with the pale skin of a northerner and neat, bark-brown hair loped over from the cooking pot. He was a new recruit, barely a man, and Chancellor Leilo could tell that Inglis was not too thrilled at being assigned the role of steward to one as elderly as himself.Inglis stood to attention, his hands behind his back. He was as plain as he was polite, a quality that Chancellor Leilo found strangely irritating. “Yes, Chancellor?” the boy said.“Finish your work, Inglis, and come inside. The storm will be here within the hour."The boy nodded sharply, and jogged back over to the pot. For a moment Chancellor Leilo remained at the doorway, watching the boy at work over their food, before passing his eyes over the circular valley for any signs of movement. There was nothing to see except the rising heat off the sands beyond, the shining blue lights of Gerudo Tower overhead, and the leviathan-like wall of dust that crept across the desert towards them. Weary, the Chancellor turned, and returned to his desk.Leilo had held the role of Chancellor for only half a year, and it was only three months into his new position that Master Kohga had been defeated. As tradition dictated -- and tradition was at the core of the Yiga Clan -- a new Master was to be elected, and it seemed every Yiga with more than a year’s service to their name thought themselves worthy. The role of selecting the candidates and running the election had fallen to Leilo -- and after months of infighting, bloody duels between members, and more bribery offers than he could count, Chancellor Leilo wanted nothing more than to put a few miles between him and that damned Valley. He had traveled to the desert with Inglis so that his mind could be at peace, and to select the worthy candidates among the applicants.No less than seventeen Yiga had put their names down; more than half of them too young, and another half after that too reckless to lead. For such an old clan, the Chancellor pondered, how could it be that so many of them were idiots?His assistant had not yet returned. Soon the sun would set, and the storm would arrive.“Inglis!” the Chancellor called as he glanced over his notes. “Inglis, hurry up, will you!”The door creaked open, slow and measured in a way that sent a chill down the Chancellor’s spine. He could not make himself turn.“Hello, Leilo," came the voice at the door. The Chancellor recognised it immediately. Slowly, he stood from his chair and turned to face it. A tall and thin man stood in the doorway, no older than twenty-five, with messy red hair and piercing dark eyes. He was dressed in plain traveller’s clothes, though his trousers and shirt were too short. He carried a painted Duplex Bow.“Bold of you to return this close to Karusa Valley," Leilo said. “You should not be here, deserter."“There’s nowhere I should be," the man responded contemptuously. “You however, should not be here either."Chancellor Leilo swallowed his fear, gripping his chair for support. He had scores of years on this boy - perhaps he could not fight, but there was no honour in being afraid.“What have you done with Inglis?” Leilo demanded. “I know your methods.”“Inglis is just fine. He is not hurt," the man crooned. His presence in the hut brought the faint smell of cinnamon. It almost made Leilo gag.“You use our ways against us. You are worse than a traitor."The boy laughed, and advanced into the hut. “Us?” he challenged. “What purpose does the Yiga Clan have anymore? Or have you been in this hovel for so long that you did not hear? Did not see?”“I will not tolerate this, deserter," Leilo barked. “Leave us! Flee with your tail between your legs - just as you did those years ago!”The deserter ignored him, unflinching. “Calamity Ganon is dead. Slain by a boy.""That isn't possible. You lie.""I would never. It was a boy with Shiekah magic, Leilo. And he lives. He’s been spotted in Lanayru, travelling with some Hylian girl."Leilo tried to keep his face as steely as he could, but his soul was old, and his spirit was no longer strong. The deserter noticed, wicked smile widening.“Hyrule Castle waits to be conquered," he goaded, taking another step into the hut. “And the Yiga sit and nibble their feathers while it lays empty."“We cannot operate without a Master,” Leilo protested. “You of all people know the chaos brought about when someone murders one of our leaders!”The deserter pouted. “Come now, you managed. I hear Secretary Milagre is doing a fine job taking over for… whatever his name was.”“How dare you! You cut down one of our own and don’t even have the respect to remember his name!”“Well, it’s been a while,” the deserter said, fiddling with his bow out of disinterest. “And it’s not why I’m here.”“Why then? What do you care for the Yiga now anyway?”“Just because I’m no longer part of your little club doesn’t mean I no longer care. There’s so much to be done now that the Champion has freed up that Castle. You should see it, see what’s there, see what’s below – "A gust of wind sent a fine rain of dust down from the rafters, adding another coat of silt to the already stuffy and dirt-strewn hut. Chancellor Leilo was unable to stop himself from coughing, hacking and lurching while the man looked on and sighed."Well, it won't do any good to tell you what we found there,” he said. “You'll never see it."Leilo composed himself, leaning haggardly against his chair for support. He knew the deserter’s heart just as he knew the cinnamon scent that followed wherever he went. Despite his aging mind, Chancellor Leilo remembered well the short years that the deserter studied under his tutelage. “You think taking Hyrule will mean there will finally be a place for you? You think the world will change that fast? I don’t care for your ambitions, deserter, no more than I did when you left us."The deserter surged forward, a large, dirt-strewn hand outstretched. The Chancellor was hurtled backwards as his attacker pinned him against the wall.“You should care, Leilo,” the man said. “Because one of the obstacles to my ambitions is you."The Chancellor squealed like a chick, his breath ragged as he battled the dust in the air and the immoveable fingers at his throat. “Inglis! Inglis!” he cried.“You see, I know that your Yiga will make a move for Hyrule Castle the second you have a new Master. And since I’m yet to gather my forces, I figure the best way to stall for time is to prevent the election from occurring at all."“Inglis!” the Chancellor shrieked. He flailed his arms and legs, but the boy’s greater strength kept him pinned to the wall. “Inglis!”His assistant appeared at the doorway, and regarded the Chancellor stoically. “Sorry, Chancellor," Inglis said calmly. He nodded to the shanty’s other occupant. “At the ready, Chief."“Very good, Inglis." the deserter replied, not taking his eyes off the Chancellor.“You...you…” the Chancellor regarded Inglis with disbelief. “With him?”“Always have been, Chancellor." Inglis answered. The deserter seemed to take great pleasure in the exchange, his dark eyes hungry for the Chancellor’s reaction.“My people will survive me," Leilo croaked, feeling suddenly faint, and light - lighter than he had felt since his youth.“No, they won’t," the deserter smiled. “There’s a new regime coming to Hyrule."A sharp pain ripped through the Chancellor’s chest before he even noticed the dagger in his attacker’s hand. The deserter withdrew, and Leilo toppled down onto the floor, his lungs afire with pain.“Wh… Why…?” he muttered before his breath left him, watching helplessly as the deserter sauntered uncaringly towards the doorway.“Come, Inglis," he smiled, patting the young Akkalan on the back. “We need to make it into Karusa Valley before this storm hits."There was another creak, and the pair were gone. Chanellor Leilo closed his eyes, feeling the essence within him slowly fade. The hut stank of dust and dirt and cinnamon, and Leilo was unable to escape it, any of it. Not the stench, not his death, and not the storm.
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
All eyes looked their way. Yellow eyes, green eyes, bright as gemstones, and even if their beholder did not stop to look, the eyes did.
Is that Link? Is she the Princess? They have come back here, once again…
Nobody but the guards on duty greeted Link and Zelda as they entered Zora’s Domain and its sparkling central plaza. Rivan spotted them first, the ochre-scaled Zora waving excitedly.“Link, welcome back!” he called. Upon seeing Zelda, his face froze. “Oh and, hello, ma’am. Welcome to Zora’s Domain.”Bazz found them not long after, and he too seemed unsure of what to make of Zelda’s presence. “Good to see Link has a fellow traveller. You must be on your way to see the King?” Bazz asked.“Certainly,” Zelda smiled. “That is precisely why we came.”Bazz gave a light nod. “Well, we don’t want to get in your way, do we Rivan?”The Zora exchanged a pensive glance. “No, we don’t.” Rivan agreed suddenly. “We shall… go alert the King to your presence. Wait here, we shan’t be long.”The two Zora hurried away from the plaza, silver armour and weapons sparkling, and were soon gone from sight.“I think they don’t recognise me,” Zelda said. “Or, are they too afraid to say anything?”Link responded with a shrug. He didn’t have any theories better than that, but still, he understood. Even if the Zora recognised her, speaking could be so hard, where looking was easy.While they waited, Link scanned the plaza and looked to where his eyes took him; to the Princess, who had moved to an ethereal stone statue at the plaza centre and was gazing up at it silently. Link himself could not bear to look upon it. He already knew what it depicted; the lovely and long dead, Champion of the Zora, Princess Mipha rising out of the stone and standing triumphant, a beacon of both hope and grief.The memories of her were still raw, but with a hazy quality. In fact, all Link's memories were much this way - always there but still just out of reach. Certain things around him made them burn brighter: the smell of salt brought flashes of childhood summers spent in Zora's Domain; the sound of clanging steel from the smithy rendering images of the Hylian Academy and the haunting smiles of his fellow Knights; and Zelda, the sunburst of yellow and blue standing by Mipha's likeness, brought Link's final days back with full clarity. He’d spent a year not really thinking about it, but now the truth haunted him. Had it all really happened? He he really died trying to save her? And yet, here they were. Zelda noticed him staring at her, and gave him a weak smile and a curt wave. Instinctually, Link waved back, though he felt silly doing so, his normally assured hand now clumsy and limp. Don't be a fool, he thought. It's just Zelda.Sometimes it was too much, all the memories. It made him feel drunk on his own thoughts. Each new piece and each new fragment brought both pain and a never-ending dissatisfaction. But Link wanted more – wanted them all – despite how much it might hurt.One of the King Dorephan's retainers approached, an old Zora whose scales were drooped with age and whose solemn eyes regarded the Hylians skeptically. Link moved to join Zelda by the statue."King Dorephan is ready to see you now," the retainer said flatly, and began to lead them into the throne room.The eyes that follow them then were all the same; they all betrayed disbelief. He felt foolish for not thinking it earlier. In all his time spent working to free the Hylian Princess from that castle, he'd never once considered if anyone would believe that he did, or that the shining blonde Hylian he had brought to the Domain was actually her. The triangle crest on her clothes advertised proudly Zelda’s allegiance to the Hylian Royal Family. Even if some Zora remembered her face, they would also remember her people's misguided plan in unearthing the ancient technology that ultimately killed their Champion. The hesitant look on Zelda's face told Link that she sensed their hostility as well.All this aside, the mood was tense in Zora's Domain. Just the day before, something had happened to Divine Beast Vah Ruta, though Link and Zelda hadn’t been able to determine what. The bridges into Zora’s Domain had been closed for an entire day, and Link and Zelda were forced to camp down by the river until they were opened. Now that they were here, being led into King Dorephan’s throne room, Link supposed they would soon find out what happened, and also how the Zora now felt about Princess Zelda. His heart was beating hard in his chest, and he could only wonder how the Princess felt.Say something, Link told himself. Anything."Are you ready?" he asked, and Zelda gave a small, resolute nod.They bowed in unison before the towering King Dorephan as an assembly of Zora elders and denizens had gathered to observe the return of the supposed Hylian Princess and Champion, though Link noted with some concern that Prince Sidon was absent. The King sat in the centre of the audience chamber, perched on his watery throne and flanked by the members of the court. Link guessed from their increasingly ornate jewels that those who sat higher and closer to the King were of higher standing, though regardless of rank they all seemed to sneer down at them in the same way.Dorephan bid them to rise. "There is no need for you to bow," he said, his deep voice filling the chamber.They stood. "It is good to see that you live, Princess," the King went on. "And that Link's efforts were not in vain.""We are…we are all grateful for what Link has done," Zelda spoke calmly and confidently, but Link recognized that tone. He'd heard it somewhere, that sliver of self-doubt, though the exact memory was hard to pin down. He wondered if the King had noticed. "And Hyrule is truly blessed to be free of Ganon at last," she continued.The King nodded in agreement. "Though not without loss."“King Dorephan – I can never offer enough gratitude for Mipha's support, or enough condolences for your loss."A scowling dark green Zora cut her off, "Do you intend to try, Princess?"He stood at the King's side, though his jewels were plain and subtle. Link recognised the old Zora as Muzu, and remembered what he was; a confidant of the King, with no need to grandstand in order to maintain his position."I intend to help where I can, but sadly I have little in the way of resources any longer,” Zelda said, standing firm."Well, we all know why,” Muzu scoffed. “Reckless wars lead to ruinous outcomes, to be sure." There were twitters among the court and then laughs and sneers.Link glared fiercely at the old Zora, with an intensity that he was sure would burn through skin. You changed your tune when I appeased Ruta, and now that Zelda is here you've changed it back. The anger flowed like molten lava through his veins. As if in response, he felt the sword on his back pulse with heat."Direct as he may be, my Advisor is right," the King said. "Glad as we are for your coming here, Princess, we are hesitant to involve ourselves once more in Hylian politics. We will support you, and your well-being, Princess, but we cannot support a Hyrule that does not exist."But it does; I've seen it, Link wanted to say. Hateno. Lurelin. Tarrey Town. They were all rebuilding, all surviving – they might not be much but they were there. If she could get them on her side, if she could convince them to help rebuild Castle Town…."Thank you, but that is frankly not why I have come," the Princess countered. "It's true. I have nothing to rebuild my home with, and no one to support me. But none of that matters while the Malice left behind by Calamity Ganon still swarms our land."Zelda held up her Sheikah Slate, revealing a small translucent map of the Zora's Divine Beast. This sent a hush through the court, and Link saw the King's face darken."Remote readings from the my Sheikah Slate reveal that Divine Beast Vah Ruta is still plagued by the corruption. I'm seeing signs that she's in a low power state and may be vulnerable. All the Divine Beasts may be similarly affected. But as contained sites of contamination they are the perfect candidates for investigation into neutralizing the Malice," She took a deep breath. Link waited for the Zora to interrupt, but none did. "I ask for access to Vah Ruta.”“Out of the question,” the King said immediately. “Vah Ruta is currently off-limits.”“Why? Because of the commotion yesterday?”Advisor Muzu harrumphed, taken aback. “How do you know that? Are you spying on us?”“No - of course not!”Link watched with dread as whispering in the court grew.“We heard the commotion from Luto’s Crossing! We heard Vah Ruta’s cry!” Zelda tried to explain. “Tell me what might have happened to her!"“It is a matter for the Zora and the Zora alone, even if Vah Ruta was once a Hylian artefact,” Muzu said. “This demand of yours is folly, you have no claim.”Zelda held up the Sheikah Slate. “I have the only claim!”Muzu recoiled further at this, and Link saw the faces of the Zora in the court turn sour and downcast. He put a hand on Zelda’s arm to calm her, trying to reel her in with just a stern look, but she would not meet his eye.“You cannot deny what we all heard!” Zelda cried. “Vah Ruta is in danger!”There was uproar in the court, and it did not simmer down until a huge fist hit the arm of the Zora throne.“Quiet! Quiet all!” King Dorephan brought his hand down, once, twice, three times until at last the crowd was quiet.The growing commotion in the court slowly hushed, like a wave receding from the shore.King Dorephan sighed. “It happened in the late afternoon," he said solemnly. "My foolish son tried to board Vah Ruta, putting himself and the entire Domain at risk. He was injured."That alarmed both Link and Zelda. "Is he okay?" asked Zelda."No," the King said gravely. "Very far from it."Prince Sidon did not notice them enter the infirmary, nor did he respond to any of Zelda's gentle greetings or questions. He barely even groaned when two nurses arrived to check and dress his wounds. Link had tugged on Zelda's arm then, beckoning her to leave so that she would not see, but she stood firm, as if she was mentally cataloguing the Prince's injuries."Tell me the truth," she said to the nurses as they were preparing to leave. "How is he?"The two cerulean-scaled Zora exchanged a glance, and then looked to Zelda before averting their eyes. They both hesitated to speak. That's all we need to know, Link thought. The taller one spoke first, wringing her hands."He survives.""But barely," added the other, her tone dismayed. "We are trying to remain hopeful."Zelda’s eyes glistened with tears. “I hope we did not come too late,” she whispered."Be sure to let us know if he stirs, we ask that you do not remain long," one of the nurses said, and they both turned to leave. Their wet footfalls echoed in the watery hallways outside, fading and leaving Link and Zelda unaccompanied with the Zoran prince.King Dorephan had explained that Sidon, seeing Calamity Ganon's defeat, must have felt a rush of valiance and pride, and sought to board Ruta. To pay his respects to Mipha, or to take control of the Divine Beast for himself – the King wasn't sure of his son's plan. Sidon was found later at the base of Vah Ruta, injured and near death, with the right side of his body tinged with an angry purple-red rot. He had been running fevers, his nurses had said, breathing shallowly and irregularly throughout the night. The Prince had yet to rouse."It's the Malice," Link stated once they were alone, looking over at Sidon."I assumed as much," Zelda agreed. "It forms when water is tainted by the Calamity, so I suppose the Zora would be susceptible to it."She flopped unceremoniously into the stool placed by Sidon's bed, intertwining her fingers in one of Sidon's limp hands and studying his face intently. "We can't let him die. I won't let Ganon take Mipha's brother too."Link grabbed another nearby stool and sat beside her. "We can think of something," he insisted, though he felt her despair creeping into his own thoughts. Sidon had felt like his only friend at times, with his unwavering faith that Link would succeed. And now the Calamity threatened to simply take him away. Just like Mipha. Just like all of them."Mipha…." Link recalled, suddenly inspired. Zelda looked at him wearily."What?"Link looked down at his hands. "She gave me her power...but I've never tried with anyone else.""Mipha's Grace," Zelda murmured her eyes lighting up as she realized what he was saying. Without another word, she stood and went to the door. "Alright," she nodded, the triangular crest on her right hand beginning to glow. "I'll make sure nobody disturbs you."Link wheeled around. "Wait – are you sure?""No, but...these powers have proven more intuitive than intellectual. So I'm just going to go with my feeling on this one."He couldn't deny her. Link nodded, and turned back to Sidon.He held his hands out over the sleeping Prince, and thought of Mipha. In the past, when he'd taken a particularly bad blow, instinct had taken over and suddenly Mipha's likeness was there. He would see her smile and hear her sweet voice, and just like that he felt completely rejuvenated. But now he had to call on the power, and he simply didn't know how."Um, any advice?" he called out."Pardon?""How do you use your powers?"Zelda looked at him thoughtfully, idle fingers adjusting her blouse as she considered his question. "I just do," she confessed."Well, what do you think about?"Zelda paused to think on the question. “I think about what I want,” she said. “What I want to happen, I mean. Or…or something that makes me feel confident. Happy, even."Link turned back around, feeling like a fool with his hands still held out over Sidon.What I want to happen. Something that makes me feel confident. Something that makes me happy. Link thought of Sidon's toothy grin, and his unbridled enthusiasm, and how the world needed the Prince's light in the same way that it had needed Mipha's. He pictured a restored kingdom and a happy people, and a smiling Princess at his side who could be at peace at last. He thought of his memories, the ones that brought him some level of contentment; such as sitting with Mipha atop Vah Ruta, relieved when she made his pain go away, and secretly hoping the afternoon could stretch on a little longer. And then his thoughts drifted over to his final memory of a past life, when he watched as the Princess saved him from the corrupted Guardians. He felt joy, and pride, at seeing her unlock her powers. In that moment, it seemed she was the centre of the world."It's working!" Zelda's breathless cry snapped Link out of his daze. He almost startled from his chair.Links hands were wreathed in a white and blue light, a faint hum emanating from them. He held them steady, and focused on Sidon. He could feel a slight pull all the way from his hands to his heart, and he swore that for an instant he heard Mipha's voice. A minute later the glow had receded and the Prince began to stir.Zelda rushed over from the door and knelt beside the bed, her eyes alive with anticipation.The Prince awoke, and flashed them a groggy smile. "Link!" he managed, his speech slurred. "You look well!"Sidon caught sight of Zelda's beaming face beside him. "And you've brought the Goddess herself."Zelda burst into laughter, swept up in her own relief. Twin tears had began to roll down her cheeks."Is everything okay?" the Prince asked, shifting awkwardly on his bed."Yes," Link answered, passing Zelda a small smile, finding himself quietly joyous when she smiled back. "It will be."
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
In the morning fog, with the sun low, Divine Beast Vah Ruta was bathed in a calming orange light, and the Malice inside was not visible. Yet both Link and Zelda could feel its influence as they drew near, wading into the waters of the plateau where Vah Ruta was perched. The Malice left a strange taste in the mouth, a bitterness like bread that had gone stale, or tea brewed too strong. With her senses returned to her, Zelda was surprised, or maybe horrified, to find that Malice also smelled of mould and blood.Once inside the Divine Beast, the stench of the Malice made Zelda feel light-headed, but she pushed past the feeling to begin their work."Alright, Link, stand back," she warned, holding her right hand up to a seeping pool of Malice. The triangular crest on her hand glowed faintly, responding to the corruption.The main chamber within Vah Ruta was slanted sharply and now partially flooded. The Divine Beast was reared on her hind legs and perched on the edge of the plateau - just the way Mipha had left her after their fight with Calamity Ganon. The only place Link and Zelda could stand with comfort was within one of the two enormous cogs at the centre of the chamber. Seeing the interior of the Divine Beast confirmed what the Sheikah Slate had indicated - Malice still plagued Vah Ruta, and from what Link said, there seemed to be more than he remembered there being when he had freed Ruta of Waterblight Ganon. Perhaps the Malice was growing and festering while it had remained undisturbed.Focusing, Zelda blasted the pool of sludge with a surge of light. She felt the power course through every inch of her body, permeating her entire being and making her feel somehow separate from everything. As if she could in some small way manipulate reality itself. The radiance receded, and the Malice gurgled just as ferociously as before. Zelda lowered her hand, sighing. She fetched the Sheikah Slate to jot down her observations. 'Sealing power has no effect?'She looked over to Link for some guidance. He stared back with wide, unblinking eyes, and gave a short shrug. Don't look at me.Link had already told her everything he could about the Malice that he'd encountered on their hike across Zora’s Domain towards Vah Ruta. Sometimes there was a nexus, or more specifically an eyeball, that could be destroyed to clear it away. Other times it was just there in large pools and could cling to any manner of surface, and nothing he'd tried - Master Sword, bombs, arrows, fire arrows - seemed to have any effect."Well, trying to simply destroy it is a bit overzealous," Zelda had said. And while Link couldn't help in her research, that wasn't to say she didn't need him. He was the core of why they were allowed into Vah Ruta in the first place. When the Zora discovered that Prince Sidon had opened his eyes, and that the Champion Link had performed the miracle with a power gifted to him by their lost Princess--well, after that they were quite happy to grant Zelda's request. The Princess was given a small room within the Domain, with no more than a bed and a small writer's desk, and Link was given a permanent bed at their inn. They were free to come and go as they pleased, and were permitted to board Vah Ruta if they could manage it without ending up like the Prince. The King was adamant however that they did not dawdle."Your act of service towards my son has earned you the access you asked for, but be warned Hyrule Princess. Vah Ruta is ours,” he had looked down at her from his high throne. "While we would all like to see her free of the corruption, we cannot abide her being turned into another Hylian experiment, and will not allow her to come to harm."As if Zelda would let that happen either. Why didn’t the King trust her? A hundred years had passed since the Calamity, and she and Link had just destroyed Ganon and saved the entire Kingdom. She expected a cool reception from the Zora, but found that they seemed to want to ice her out completely.Zelda was certain however that with enough time and enough thorough investigation, she could figure out a way to destroy the Malice. But without Link's help to climb the steep inclines and unsteady platforms, Zelda was unable to get inside the Divine Beast at all, let alone conduct any research.To make matters worse, the main control unit inside Ruta was now entirely submerged. The circular chamber was situated at the stern of the Divine Beast and had received the brunt of the flooding waters that drained towards the rear of the structure. Without access to the control unit, there was no way to move Ruta at all, and so every room and every corridor would remain at such a steep incline that they were untraversable.Zelda looked around the interior of Vah Ruta, at the cogs and mechanism, sealed pathways and stone-covered moss. There was so much more of the Divine Beast that she wanted to see, and none of it within reach unless they could reach the main control unit.She looked down at her notes on the Sheikah Slate and then towards the orange glow emanating from the main control unit in the large circular chamber beyond. It was obscured by the waters and was little more than a hazy orange shape, but she could see it. If she could see it, maybe she could reach it.Determined, Zelda waded into the waters until they were just over her waist. She looked back to Link, who was busy securing their packs to a hanging chain so that they would be out of the water. Confident that he hadn’t noticed her, Zelda turned back to the deep waters, transfixed. She imagined how shocked Link would be, how proud.“Zelda, what are you doing?” He had seen her at last.“I’ll be fine, I promise.”He left their things and headed towards her. “Fine? Wait – Princess!”By then she had already dived into the waters. Ahead, the shining glow of the main control unit beckoned. Zelda could see the faint outline of it, maybe thirty feet down, and so she swam with all her might.Deeper she swam, the Sheikah Slate held outstretched. The cold didn’t bother her, nor did the immense weight of her clothes. But the darkness of the water. She hadn’t expected it. It closed in fast, the only light remaining coming from the control unit. Zelda began to tire, the urge to breathe growing. She felt dizzy. Where was the Sheikah Slate? Did she still have it?There was a faint blue light ahead of her. Hadn’t the control unit been orange? No, must have been blue. She followed the light but it never seemed to grow closer. Where was she again? Darkness was all around her. It was suffocating, pushing in at her from all directions.Deeper she seemed to sink, deeper into the waters, deeper into disorientation. Was this – was this the Castle? But how? They had defeated him. It had been real. It had finally been real! Zelda tried to scream but couldn’t even open her mouth. She flailed but didn’t seem to move, until some grabbed a hold of her and held tight, pulling her through the water. She thrashed violently but couldn’t free herself. Never! She thought. I will never go back to that Castle! All at once the darkness was breached, as Zelda felt herself be pulled clean from the waters. She coughed and spluttered, spitting water and gasping for air. Looking down at her hands, she saw them outstretched on cold, mossy stone, and remembered at once where she was.Vah Ruta rumbled, shaking slightly. But otherwise, there were no sounds but the quiet lapping of water.Link was beside her, rubbing circles in her back. For a moment, Zelda saw fear on his face.“The Slate?” she coughed.“I got it,” Link said, though he did not hand it over to her. Instead, he went to their packs and returned with both his cloak and hers, wrapping Zelda up in both of them. For half an hour they sat in silence while Zelda recovered; she stewed the entire time, cursing her lack of physical fitness.“You should try,” she said to Link.He shook his head. “I don’t want to drown.”“Probably for the best. Without you, who would be here to keep me alive?”“It can be difficult.”Zelda laughed at that, but could not shake her frustration. “Even if you could reach the terminal, you couldn’t pilot Vah Ruta. You’d need to be inducted.”Link looked at her quizzically.“It’s how we assigned pilots to the Beasts. We used the Sheikah Slate. It only took a few minutes but, even that is too long if we need to be underwater for it.”“Maybe the Zora could help?” Link offered.“No. It’s our technology. It has to be us.”Waiting for her clothes to dry, Zelda sat in a pensive silence, trying to come up with some solution. They had no options; either they finished the job with an immobile, flooded and skyward-raised Divine Beast, or not at all.“I hate to say this, but I wish we needn’t come to the Divine Beast at all,” she said. “Unless… unless that’s it!”Zelda stood, throwing off both the cloaks Link had given her. The idea revived her fully, and she set about happily explaining it. If Ruta was inaccessible, she would cut Ruta out of the equation entirely!The rest of their day would be spent carefully extracting some of the Malice that clung to Ruta's walls, placing what they had into one of the leftover Sheikah Chests to take back to Zora’s Domain. Zelda's research could continue, and neither of them would need to go near Ruta.“How will the Zora feel about that?” Link asked, but Zelda merely shrugged.“They’ll thank me when we figure it out.”After so many years and so much time spent on the cusp of both victory and defeat, Zelda was surprised to find herself slipping easily back into a routine. In the mornings she broke her fast with salted fish and pickings of fruit, sitting in one of the water-filled gazebos on the outer edges of the Domain. By day she was glued to her research - poking and prodding at the Malice and noting how it reacted, if it reacted. By night she went over her notes, planned her work for the morrow, and rested. The Zora were none too pleased that she'd brought the poisonous sludge back into the Domain, but Zelda assured them she could keep it contained.At first Link followed her everywhere - acting on his instincts again - and they would slip into their comfortable silence as usual. But then she started seeing him less and less. He was off practising his swordplay perhaps. Or swimming. Or fishing. It wasn't important; what mattered was that he got his well-deserved break.That morning however, she could not find him. He was usually nearby, at least. The day before she had found him chatting idly with a still-recovering Sidon, and the day before that he was poking around the tools in the workshop. But today? She had jogged through every twisting watery corridor, checked the length of both bridges leading from the Domain, and teleported over to Vah Ruta alone - but he was nowhere to be found. Zelda slumped down at the base of Divine Beast, taking off her shoes to soak her sore feet in the lake that filled the plateau on which Ruta stood. She cursed under her breath as she rubbed her legs. Where is he?Turning back towards the Domain, Zelda spotted a blue-and-white figure jogging along the cliff's edge towards her. Link! she thought for half a second, until she realised the figure was too tall to be a Hylian. Eventually a lean and youthful looking Zora came into view, and waved her over. Zelda didn't recognise the woman, but then again there were so many Zora in the Domain that it was hard to keep track."Princess," the woman said. "Oh, I'm glad I ran into you. I was just coming to check on Vah Ruta.""Well, there doesn't seem to be any change in her.""Of course," the woman replied with a smile. "If I may, Princess, the King has asked me to relay a message to you. In one week, we will be holding the Champion Festival, and so the King asks that Vah Ruta remain empty until then.""Wait, what?" Zelda stammered. "I need to continue my research. We need to secure more samples."The Zora woman's face dropped. "These are the King’s orders, I’m afraid," she said curtly, pushing past to head towards the Divine Beast. Zelda stomped along behind her."Some more notice would have been appreciated," she called out to the woman. "And just who are you?""Larella, Personal Attendant to the King," the woman returned. Zelda raced to catch up to her. They were fast approaching the plateau lake."Well perhaps then, Larella, you'd like to convey to the King that I've requested access into the workshop several times now, and each time I've been ignored. I can't just carry out experiments from my desk--""Noted, of course. I’ll pass it on!" the Zora woman said, before diving into the lake and disappearing. Zelda kicked the dirt in spite of herself, feeling like a spurned child. She considered waiting at the lake's edge for the stupid woman to return, but quickly realised she didn't have the patience. I will just have to make do until they change their minds, she thought.Zelda found Link underneath the Domain, after she'd run into a less-than-healthy looking Sidon in the central plaza. The Prince had been sitting by Mipha's statue on a small stone stool, and was wrapped in a long cloak. He seemed to shiver as he spoke, and Zelda could tell he was mustering all of his remaining energy."He's helping us out with the octoroks at the moment," Sidon had grinned. "It's great!""Octoroks?" Zelda wasn't even aware there were octoroks in the Domain."Right under our feet!" Sidon exclaimed, pointing to the marble ground of the plaza. "I mean that literally. He's down there trying to clear them out for us."And so Zelda made the climb down to the underbelly of the Domain, and found Link shuffling about in the shallow waters, shield in hand and the mighty Great Eagle bow strapped to his back. She felt a twinge of recognition and sadness upon seeing the proudly made bow, with its limbs painted in lilac and gold. Revali’s bow, she thought. At least it’s being put to use.A trio of blue water octoroks glared up at Link from beneath the water surface, all surfacing in unison to launch three boulders in his direction. The knight deftly dodged all three, and quickly fired at the leftmost octorok. It screeched and splashed back into the water, but was not dead."Link," Zelda called out. He quickly looked her way, and then returned his attention to the octoroks. "Where have you been?"He ignored her, feet dancing on the slippery rocks as he dodged yet another onslaught. "Link," she called out again."Busy," was all he said as he fired yet another arrow into the injured octorok. It finally succumbed, and floated limply down the river. The two remaining octoroks seemed to seethe at Link now that their friend had been dispatched.In a huff, Zelda stormed forward towards the octoroks, raised her right hand and unleashed a blast of energy into the waters. Link startled backwards, nearly losing his footing. When the light receded, there were no octoroks to be seen - only some unrecognisable remains and a pair of octo balloons. Link waded into the water to fetch them, quickly latching them both to his belt.“Thanks,” he said, and made for the ladder back to the main plaza of the Domain, but Zelda stood in his path."Did they tell you about the Champion Festival?" she demanded. "Because I've only just heard.""Yes, I've heard.”"Did they tell you that we're being barred from Vah Ruta? For a week?"Link raised an eyebrow. "Do you know why they celebrate Champion Festival?"Zelda threw up her hands. "Well, of course! But what am I meant to do for a week? We're almost out of samples."Link placed his bow back on his back, and his expression changed. He gave her a stern look. "Is that it?" he asked quietly."I'm sorry?""Is that why you're angry?""Yes," she said firmly, meeting his gaze. "That and other things."Link bit his lip, but said nothing. He gave a cursory nod, and walked past her towards the ladder without another word. She called after him, but he simply climbed up and out of sight, not even stopping to say where he was going. All around, Zora's Domain glittered passively as if to taunt her. Looking beyond the Domain she could see the flowing river stretching out into the valley, and the blue and red and green flashes of colour that gracefully streamed through the water as the Zora passed to and from the Domain - all happily going about their business and paying her absolutely no mind. You don't belong here, they seemed to say in unison. You don't belong anywhere.The sun was high and in his eyes when Link emerged from the underbelly of Zora’s Domain. He held up his hand and covered it with his thumb to gauge the time. Before noon, he surmised. What was he going to do with the rest of his day?He peered down the ladder, and saw Zelda sitting on the rocks underneath the Domain with her knees tucked into her chest. He’d talk to her later - her mood was changeable and difficult and he didn’t know what kind of Zelda he’d get on a given day. Sometimes it was the Princess, very polite, in cheery spirits, and sometimes it was someone else. Someone with less patience, someone who made him kind of mad sometimes. Was she always like this? He simply couldn’t remember.They’d been in Zora’s Domain nearly two weeks, and the days were starting to stretch on, testing even Link’s patience. He could feel himself getting antsy all over, like he had a belly full of bugs. He flexed his hands, wanting to feel the weight of a sword, wanting to feel his blood course through his veins and rush to his lungs after a breathless dash across a battlefield. He wanted to fall just to feel the wind on his face. He wanted to run for his life just to run at all. Odd jobs helping with pest control in Zora’s Domain didn’t quite scratch that itch.Sidon flashed him a knowing grin as Link walked back into the plaza. "Two down!" he cheered upon seeing the octo balloons, before stopping suddenly as a hacking cough overcame him."How are you feeling?" Link asked, noticing the vein-shaped streaks of Malice creeping out from under the Prince's cloak."I'm alive, Link, all thanks to you," the Prince smiled, though Link wondered for how much longer. The Prince shifted uncomfortably on his stool, and was overcome once again by his relentless cough. The Zora in the plaza seemed to slow and stop what they were doing, anxiously peering in the Prince's direction."Did you see anything in Vah Ruta?" Sidon asked, changing the subject. "Did anything attack you?""No? Why?"Sidon leaned in, his eyes darting around the plaza as if to check for eavesdroppers. His voice was low, with an unnerving graveness that Link was not used to hearing from the Prince. "The nurses informed my father that some of my wounds were made by a blade. That my injuries don't match up with a fall."Link's stomach dropped. How many times had he and the Princess gone to Vah Ruta unarmed? Or the Princess completely on her own? Perhaps this was why they were barred from Ruta."Do you know what it might have been?"The Prince frowned, and shook his head. Though he would not admit it, the news of the threat filled Link with excitement. Confined within the bounds of the Domain had made him feel like a stranger in his own body. With Zelda safe and undisturbed by malicious beasts, foul monsters, or treacherous clans, what was there for him to do?Well, there was one thing to do. Those damned octoroks. They'd already torn through a number of shields, and Dento the smith was getting hesitant to give him any more. It was a struggle as well to take them down with arrows alone; he must have weeded out the thinner-skinned ones by now. And yet they were still growing in number. He needed something stronger. Something quicker than even an arrow. A Guardian's laser would do it, Link mused, smiling at the absurdity of the thought. And while it seemed the Princess was more than capable of dispatching them, he didn’t want to risk offending her by asking for a favour. Truth be told, Link was as frustrated with her as the Zora were, but he wasn't sure what to make of that feeling, or how to confront her about it.Once Prince Sidon had returned to the infirmary, Link made his way to the smithy. He sat in the workshop examining an arrow he'd pulled from a dead octorok, listening to the sounds of Dento tinkering away at some shield repairs. The trouble was the way the octoroks attacked. They'd hide under water where he couldn't get a good shot at them, and then jump up without any notice. By the time Link could draw his bow, the damn things had already fired at him and he would lose precious time dodging. He needed something that could be fired with one hand, allowing him to block with his shield, or something that could be fired immediately, before the octoroks could retaliate. The idea set off the pangs of familiarity - another memory. But it was too fuzzy to even access. All he could recall was the Academy, of his years spent training to be a Knight, so it must have had something to do with that.Dento listened carefully when Link explained the problem, nodded solemnly and mumbling in agreement."Yes, yes," he observed. "A quickfire mechanism - a crossbow, that is what you need. Though I believe I'm too busy preparing for the Champion Festival to craft one for you."Crossbow! That was it. Some of the Knights, the stronger ones, carried large crossbows instead of bows. Link had tried to use one once but found them too forceful and brutish. Which would make them perfect for cutting through octoroks. Link fetched his bow from the workbench, and casually nocked and drew the arrow in his hand. The comfort of the weight made him smile.He felt a surge of determination. "Could I use the workshop, Master Dento?" he asked. The old Zora looked over at the spare workbench, which was occupied by a variety of Link's weapons and belongings."You already are, Champion," he said, and returned to his work.Dento had to be recruited into the process after all, since Link knew little to nothing about weapon craft. With an awkward hand Link drew up the plans, carved and finished the wood, and spent a week's worth of long days fiddling and doting on his creation until finally, he managed to get it to fire. His hands were blistered from the work, and he'd lost count of the number of splinters he'd pulled. But once it was done, Link was unable to stop himself from grinning. And since he wasn't permitted to do much else, Sidon had taken to sitting with him in the workshop as well, still wrapped in his cloak and wincing at the slightest breeze. Zelda had not joined him in the workshop. He only saw her in the mornings and evenings when they ate their meals, and they spoke little. She seemed to spend most of her time in her room, perhaps working on her research, while Link had been sequestered to the workshop. Both times he had run into Zelda, she had told him she was just fine. Link told himself each day he would seek her out and they would talk, but it never seemed to happen.At the end of the week however, the crossbow was finished at last. Prince Sidon and Master Dento marvelled at the creation when Link showed it off to them in the workshop."Fantastic!" Sidon beamed. "I can't believe you're doing this just for us.""Link's a regular prodigy," Dento agreed. "Was your father a smith?"The Princess's words echoed in his head, from a memory a hundred year’s past. Your path seems to mirror your father's."He was a Knight, I think," Link answered, though he wasn't entirely sure.All around them, the Domain was abuzz. It was the day before the Champion Festival, and preparations were very much underway: long streamers of woven pastel flowers and shrubbery were strung between the glittering columns of the Domain; Mipha’s monument and the re-created jewels that decorated it were polished until they shone; Zoran nobles squabbled about their allocated seats; and the air was filled with the rich aromas of salt-fish, stewed crabs and all manner of delicacies as the entire Domain worked to contribute to the feast.The King had passed on a message through his assistant Larella, inviting Link to join himself, Sidon, and the Zora elders in boarding Vah Ruta to pay their respects to Mipha. Link questioned the safety of the plan, only because Vah Ruta was still corrupted by the Malice."The Princess hasn't found a way to get rid of it yet--""The Princess need not be consulted," Larella explained. "Nor need she concern herself with our traditions."“Has she been invited?”“The King decides on invitations,” Larella deflected, though the answer was a clear no.They're excluding her, Link realised. “I’ll go if the Princess can go.”“Well, I can’t confirm if she was invited. Hylians are ordinarily not permitted near Vah Ruta during the Festival. You would be a guest of honour of course.”“Then I’d better stay with her. I have to decline, sorry.”"We would be honoured by your presence, Link,” Larella pressed. “You were Mipha's betrothed, after all.”"I know," Link said, bowing his head. "I'm sorry - it wouldn't be right."He didn't see Zelda the entire day of the Champion Festival, even though he was sure she’d have been welcome to attend that. He had left a bowl of warm chowder by her door during the midday feast, slipping a small note underneath to tell her that there was food if she wanted it. When he returned in the evening, the bowl was empty, so he knew at least that she was in there.He knocked on her door, and heard nothing but silence. He knocked again: nothing. Gingerly he opened the door, and found an empty room. It was tidy, but dreary and bleak. The exact kind of place that no one could enjoy being cooped up in.Link found Zelda standing in one of the water-filled gazebos on an upper terrace of the main structure. She was looking down over the central plaza, where the Zora were feasting and dancing, though by now the music had died down."One hundred and one years," she said after he approached. "It's been over a century now since the Calamity, and since they lost Mipha. They've turned a horrible day into a celebration - all because of how much they loved her."Link couldn't tell if she was looking at the Zora with sorrow or contempt. Knowing the Princess – how the Zora had treated her, and how she had treated them – it could have been either. He gripped the railing of the gazebo, unsure how to respond. The day of the Great Calamity. The day of the Champion Festival. But there was more to it than that, he realised. It was also Zelda’s birthday, as it had been when the Calamity had struck. He hadn’t even realised. Has she? Link knew this could be the time to finally talk to her, but hesitated. He could very well make the entire day worse.“Have you spoken to Sidon?” he asked.“A few days ago.”“A few days ago?”“I’ve been keeping to myself. It’s clear the Zora don’t like me very much, after all.” There was bitterness in her voice. What happened to the determined Princess who arrived in Zora’s Domain a fortnight ago?"At least I'll be able to go to Vah Ruta tomorrow," Zelda pondered, cutting through his thoughts."I'll come with you."She didn't look at him; her eyes were fixed on the celebrations below."Thank you," she muttered.Before Link could say anything else, Zelda quietly stepped past him to walk back to her room.Somehow, Vah Ruta looked worse. The Malice they had removed had already grown back, and unless Zelda was second-guessing herself, there seemed to be more.Link had climbed up towards the bow to examine the parts of Ruta that Zelda could not reach. She waited patiently for him from within the large cog, remembering with sorrow the way Vah Ruta had looked when they'd discovered her. Majestic and shining, so complex and yet somehow organic in the way she moved. Eventually Zelda heard the rush of air against fabric, and Link floated back into view with his paraglider."Not good," he reported, showing her the photos he'd taken with the Sheikah Slate.Zelda puffed out her cheeks in frustration. There was definitely more, and she still had no way of destroying it.“There has to be something else we can do. Some other way of dealing with the Malice. But… I feel like I’ve tried everything.” Zelda looked over to Link. "You should have come here with the King yesterday, like they offered. He might have had ideas.” Link opened his mouth to speak, but she cut him off. "Don't worry, I heard about the invitation. If they wanted to send me a message, then they succeeded. I should have known it would be like this."The silence that fell then was different to the others. Zelda could feel Link's eyes on her as she jotted down some notes, and when she looked up he was biting his lip and holding the Sheikah Slate close to his chest."What's the matter, Link?" she pressed. "Tell me.""Have you…" he began slowly. She could tell he didn't want to say the words. "Have you thought about why they are upset?""If they had reasons, they could have told me.""But have you?"Zelda was taken aback. "I mean, I..." she struggled to explain herself. "Vah Ruta has become a sacred site for them, and I’m an outsider, so they simply don’t want me here.""If you just spoke to them about it—”"I have spoken to them!""Aside from when you need something."Zelda crossed her arms "What makes you say that?""Because it's how you've been treating me.”“Don’t be ridiculous!”They glared at each other, and all that could be heard was the soft lapping waves of the water on Ruta’s plateau. It took the stillness of Zelda to realise Link was shaking, his fists balled at his sides. The quiet, raging disappointment emanating from him was enough for her to want to back down - but she had to stand up for herself."Well I'm sorry for focusing on my research,” she said more petulantly than planned."It's all you've been focusing on," Link shot back.Unbidden, memories of her last confrontation with her father rose. Zelda could see his frustrated features, hear the disappointment in his tone, and felt as though she were speaking directly to him. “Without research what am I doing here? What other purpose could I serve? I don’t have friends among the Zora like you do!”“You can make friends!”“Says you, Hero of Hyrule. I’ve been working every day to help the Zora, but you don't even have to do anything! Do you think they would care for you at all if it weren't for Mipha? If she hadn't loved you?"The regret was instant, but the words had still been said. Link’s face softened from one of rage to one of disbelief. "How can you say that?"Zelda had no response. There was nothing she could say now.Link shook his head, and threw the Sheikah Slate at her feet. Zelda heard the ruffle of his paraglider as he leapt from the Divine Beast and then nothing. A seagull cawed outside somewhere. Gentle rain begin to fall. He wasn’t coming back. She sat in Vah Ruta for a long time then, her head in her hands. If she had cried, the tears were long dry now. With no other way of leaving the Divine Beast, and no wish to make the hike back to Zora’s Domain, Zelda teleported back to Ne'ez Yohma Shrine underneath the plaza. The King's assistant, Larella, was waiting for her at the Shrine entrance. Zelda was flustered by the woman's unexpected appearance. "How did you know I'd be here?"The Zora looked down her nose at the Princess. "The Champion told us where you'd gone, so we knew you'd turn up eventually," she sneered. "I have a message from King Dorephan"A message? “What does he say?”"It has become clear that your research has caught no carp. King Dorephan requests that you conclude in one week, and either remain in Zora’s Domain as a regular guest, or depart to continue your studies elsewhere," Larella said. She bowed a mocking bow, and walked back up the stairs leading to the Plaza.Zelda clutched the Sheikah Slate to her chest. They had all turned on her: the Zora, the King, Link. No, she thought. I've turned them against myself.Dejected and wanting to return to her room, Zelda climbed the stairs back into the plaza.There she came upon the statue of Princess Mipha, that undying monument not only to her strength but her grace. This statue heard every conversation, saw every interaction, and was privy to every moment of the Zora’s lives. In the statue’s blank but serene eyes, Zelda found her resolve. From one princess to another, the lesson was learned.Zelda stowed her Sheikah Slate at her belt. Research would not get her out of this mess. Talking wasn’t helping much either. Instead, she’d have to do the one thing that Lady Mipha still could: listen.
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
Red, white, and blue. She's all colour, all song.
Wide yellow eyes framed by jewels: jewels on her crown, her wrists and waist, on her ankles, jewels all the way down. Her lips move but she doesn't speak. She smiles but she doesn't breathe. Her long fingers entomb a glittering bracelet, shielding it from harm. She's encircled in a blinding light, the centre of the world, and then the light fractures inwardly, collapsing, and her fingers unfurl to reveal - the bracelet is blackened and festering with a wound that looks like flesh and reeks of death. She is suspended within an empty sky, reflected below on a waveless sea. Then there's a blight in the water, a sluggish growth of foetid corruption and hatred and malice. She wails, a scream that echoes for one hundred years and….
Link's eyes snapped open and he gasped for breath, fighting off the vestiges of his nightmare. His head was pounding, vision fuzzy. He threw off the light linen covering on his bed and clumsily planted his feet on the floor. The cool of the marble calmed him, grounded him. Zora’s Domain, he remembered. Silence and darkness blanketed the inn of Zora's Domain, punctured only by a few diffuse marble lanterns. A hundred feet below, the Zora River bubbled and gurgled with an oblivious ease.Link exhaled. Slowly, the dream began to fade. Reality was creeping back and extending its long fingers of familiarity and ease. He was still shaken, skin clammy with sweat, but thankfully the dream was over. A gentle breeze blew through the Domain, but it was enough to set his lips a-quiver. He clutched his knees to his chest, peering around the room as his eyes began to adjust to the dim light. In the next bed slept a Hylian man, his whistling snores the only sound save the river below. If Link closed his eyes and focused, it almost sounded like a song.Flashes of the dream-memory came back without warning. Mipha. Again. Always. Why was it always her? He'd lost others: all of his friends from the Academy, the other Champions, his father and his mother as well he assumed - though with an overwhelming sense of shame, Link realised he could not remember if either of his parents were alive before the Calamity. His thoughts turned to Prince Sidon, and then to Princess Zelda, and he wondered how many more people he would lose before his life was done. But still, it was the Princess of the Zora that haunted him, even though he knew she was at rest. What did I do? What did I say, all those years ago, that she won't leave me be?Zelda would know. Would she tell him now? Probably not, after their argument the night before. In any case, Link's stomach turned at the thought of seeing her, let alone speaking to her. With resignation, he determined that he had no choice. In an age past, the hero and the princess were bound by fate - a fate that Link now had to suffer, for the good of Hyrule if nothing else.A surge of relief washed over him as the first rays of sun began to blanket the Domain. Link sat on his bed watching the morning come, mentally cataloguing the facts of his life since he had awoken from the Shrine of Resurrection. He was a Knight (by whose authority?) in service to Princess Zelda of Hyrule (what was left of it); the Champion who had defeated Calamity Ganon (with Zelda’s help, of course); bearer of the Master Sword and a great swordsman (so he’d once been told), strong enough to wield a Rito bow, a little short but quick enough to make up for it; a homeowner, a decent camp cook, with enough grit to conquer at least a hundred of those Sheikah shrines; his skin tanned from long days on the road and body scarred from endless battles, his eyes blue, hair long and jaw bearing the hint of a beard. Only men had beards. But he'd been awake at least a year now, Link realised, which meant his birthday had surely come and gone by now. That made him… twenty?Zelda would know. What else of his memories did the Princess hold hostage?Link pushed that final, difficult thought out of his mind as finally, the first full rays of sunlight peeked over the cliffs to the east, and the Domain was awash with light. And where there was light, there was work, and where there was work, the demons of the night would cower.
Day One
Zelda knelt before the King once more, though this time Dorephan did not tell her to rise. Light pierced the royal audience chamber. It sliced through the frigid morning air and created the novel sensation of warm sun on cool skin that marked the first days of a long winter ahead. Somehow the ice in the air made the world shine brighter. Colours sprang out like old friends seeking an embrace, and sounds - even familiar ones - seemed thicker in timbre, fiercer and harsher against the ears. To Zelda, even moving felt strange, as though she could glide across the azure marble and glass floors of Zora's Domain. It took a concentrated effort to ground herself in the present moment, and raise her head to meet the steady gaze of the Zora King.His entourage of retainers and nobles surrounded him as ever. The ageing Zora of the court--who no doubt had likely known her father--were perched like herons on the raised platform around the King's Throne. She tried to imagine it was her father kneeling in her place, with all his presence and command.What was it her father had once said? Never show the enemy contempt. Then they know they have affected you. How she wished she remembered more of what he tried to impress on her in her youth, even if his methods were lacking."Well met, Princess," King Dorephan began calmly. "Have you been made aware of our decision?""Yes, and promptly," Zelda returned, gathering all the politeness she had in her for this moment. "Your assistant Larella is most personable. But I am not contesting the decision."There were whispers among the court. "You will not?" the King said curiously."No. I have come here to share a story. You see, I realise that neither myself nor Link have taken the time to tell you of Mipha's bravery in her final hours."This somehow caused more scandal than if Zelda had indeed come to protest. If there was anything to set the Zora a-twitter, it was more information on their Princess.The scowling dark green Zora was the first to question her. Muzu, she remembered. A close confidant of Dorephan. "What could you possibly add? We know well of Mipha's movements, and we know of her fate from Link."“I simply want to share more of her history–”“Bah! A waste of time!” cried Muzu.A deep-navy Zora spoke up, one who stood among the King’s retinue. "Now, now, Muzu. I'm sure the King would be interested in hearing everything there is to say about Mipha. If the Princess can add to our historical records, I say why not let her speak?"“It may be valuable to gather all the intel that we can of the Calamity, in the event of its return,” added a brown-scaled Zora added, who stood proud and tall with his hands behind his back. “Don’t you think so, Muzu?”“Jiahto, Sergeant Seggin – surely you do not agree with the Hylian?” Muzu said, but both of the opposing Zora nodded.
Is it...working? Will they really listen to me?
"Go on, Princess," King Dorephan urged. "Tell us what you know."In truth, Zelda didn't have much to add. But she told them about how quickly Mipha had learned to control Ruta, and her plans for utilising the Divine Beast in ways other than battle. She spoke of all the times Mipha had carted Link off to Zora's Domain for healing, and how the two of them would often spend entire afternoons together atop Vah Ruta. She spoke of how Mipha tried to help her unlock her sealing powers, and how despite their differences, the Zora Princess had always been kind, and was a living embodiment to the strong friendship between the Zora and the Hylians."I have nothing to offer, I know," Zelda said. "But when the time is right, I will repay the Zora for her bravery. In a way befitting of her."All the while the King nodded slowly, seemingly unmoved by her story. Zelda noticed however, that some in the court had bowed their heads solemnly."You have confirmed what a treasure she was to us," the King finally said. "For this I am grateful."Zelda nodded, clasping her hands at her chest. "That is all I wanted."She moved to leave the chamber."Princess," the King boomed. "Speak truly - you have no objection to our decision?Zelda turned back towards the King and his retinue, and stood before them with all the importance and regality that she could muster from her memory of her own regal father. I am a Bosphoramus too, am I not? She told herself as she gathered the will to speak."My father once told me that there are choices we must make when we have no choice at all. And I have made my choice. I will help, whoever I can, where I can, for as long as I can."As she left the chamber, she heard those among the Zora sneer."If you can," one of them drawled. Zelda kept her chin high, despite the uncertainty she felt.Sidon's physical injuries had mostly begun to heal, but the seeping infection of Malice on his body had not. The Princess went to visit him in the infirmary, where she found Link sitting at his side, holding that homemade crossbow of his. The Prince's face lit up when he saw the Hylian princess, while Link's face remained convincingly stoic. Her knight visibly tensed when she walked into the room, quickly hiding whatever he was holding out of sight and stiffly sitting back in his chair."Prince Sidon," she said with a smile. And then, taut as Gerudo silk, “Hello Link.”"Zelda!" the Prince smiled. "Just the face I wanted to see - it is as if Hylia herself were here, don't you agree Link?"Zelda laughed nervously, seeing from Link's dour expression that he did not. Ignoring him, she pulled up a silverite chair next to the large waterbed and unhooked her Sheikah Slate. "Show me your arm, Sidon, if you will."The Prince reluctantly lifted his blankets, and extended out his right arm. The entire length was covered in a web of purple and black vein-like protrusions that pulsed with its own rhythm, as if locked in a dance. Warmth blossomed in her right hand in reaction - and there was no doubting it, the infection was Malice. She gently placed her hand against his wrist, and the Prince winced in pain. The triangular crest shone on her hand with a sparkling brilliance."Hmm...if the power reacts, why is it not enough?" she muttered to herself. She tapped at the Sheikah slate, pulled out the compendium, and scrolled through to her notes. A few weeks' worth of research must have culminated in something - something that she could maybe, just maybe, use to help him. Sidon was waiting patiently, his head turned away from his arm in self-disgust."Alright, give me your hand," Zelda instructed, cross-checking her notes.The Prince laughed, face brightening. "So forward, Princess! You know you've yet to reclaim your Kingdom.""Or, I can let this corruption slowly kill you, hm?"Sidon obliged her without another word, grinning brilliantly and Zelda interlaced their fingers so that their hands were palm to palm. She looked back to Link, who was silently regarding them both, his features twinged with concern. Sidon too looked at her with anticipation, eyes glimmering. How does Sidon do that? she wondered privately. How does he go from so sorrowful to so full of life?Pushing the thoughts away, she began to explain. "In my research over the past few weeks, I've found that sustained exposure to my powers would cause the Malice to calm for a time. I never succeeded in destroying it, but perhaps I can relieve your pain, or slow the spread.""I trust you," Sidon said, unwavering.Zelda closed her eyes and thought of her childhood, and of the last time she saw her mother alive. How proud and striking the woman had looked, bathed in the morning light that streamed through the tall windows of her chambers. How she had taken Zelda's hands in her own and reassured her daughter that no matter what happened, no matter their individual fates, neither of them would ever truly be alone. Once you have known love, little one, loneliness can never take root. Zelda felt deep down it was a lie, but the memory fed her power all the same.When the light faded, Zelda opened her eyes and looked apprehensively at Sidon. She released his hand, and the Prince flexed his long fingers. He gingerly moved his arm back and forth, a wide smile growing on his face. The web of Malice had seemed to recede, if only slightly."Are you certain you aren't the Goddess herself?" he beamed. "That was incredible! If you did want to propose, now would be the time, Princess!"Zelda had almost had enough of Sidon's flattery. Flustered, she attempted to protest, "Don’t be ridiculous– I mean, it wouldn’t be– Not that you aren’t–!""You'd upset your fan club," Link said nonchalantly, the suddenness of his voice sending a jolt down Zelda's spine.Sidon blinked at them. "...I have a fan club?"“Growing every day,” Link affirmed with a grin.Zelda wasn't sure what to believe. She chewed her lip, trying to think of something courteous to say to ease the air of awkwardness that filled the room. Behind her Link was looking off to the side, suppressing an amused smile. And then Zelda laughed, and she heard Link chuckle as well, though they were both upstaged by the Prince's growing laughs at a joke Zelda suspected he didn't fully understand. And just as ferociously as they began, the Prince's laughs were overcome by ragged coughs. He shivered, and pulled his blankets back over himself."How are you feeling, Sidon?" Zelda asked."Much better, thanks to you!" the Prince said, his face awash with worry despite the twinkling grin he gave them. "I– I shall be back on my feet in no time."But that was not what she saw. She had to face the truth, as much as she didn't want to. Her powers had done little more than ease Sidon’s pain. Otherwise, he looked worse: worse than he appeared when they had first seen him; worse than he seemed a week ago; worse than the day prior when she'd seen him slowly sauntering around the Domain during Champion Festival. There was a noticeable pallor to his scales, dulling what she assumed was his usual crimson to an almost pink hue. His eyes were baggy from lack of sleep, and the ivory scales of his front were mottled with rippling red blotches.They bid Sidon a good rest, and together she and Link left the infirmary. Before the knight could silently skulk away, she caught him by the arm. The words were on her lips; afraid as she was to say them, this was not a time for fear, only truth."He's dying, Link.”The knight did not turn, but did not pull away. "He is.”"What should we do?" she asked him. Desperation made her believe that perhaps Link knew. That he would turn, take her hands in his and reassure her and fix all this. But instead– “I don’t know,” he murmured. “I’m sorry.”He gently pulled himself free of her grip, nodded, and disappeared down the hall.
Day Two
"So, Dento makes all the jewellery?" Link asked Sidon the next morning."Oh, for as long as I can remember, yes," the Prince answered.They sat together by Mipha's statue - the Prince wrapped in a cloak to keep warm, contently watching the bustle of Zora's Domain while Link worked on tweaking the firing mechanism for his crossbow. Despite his success in getting the weapon to fire, he had yet to figure out an efficient way of making crossbow bolts – regular arrows broke under the force of the firing mechanism. Until then, the growing throng of octoroks below the Domain could rest easy.Link pointed up towards Mipha, to the stylized heart-shaped bracelets she wore. "He made those?""None other," the Prince answered. "The loss of those jewels is a lingering tragedy in my family. Once Ruta is safe to board, we will find them, Link."Link stared up at the statue, uneased by its likeness, and focused on the bracelets. Yes - they were the same as the one he'd seen in his dream. The pinpricks of familiarity were at him again, taunting him with a memory he couldn't reach. The bracelets...something had happened with them, all those years ago. He latched onto whatever small details he could. It had happened here in the Domain, he had been young, and despite the lingering sorrow there was a sweetness to the feeling."Do you remember much of your sister?" he asked suddenly.The Prince paused to consider his answer. "Not as much as I would like," he admitted. "Even for the Zora, one-hundred years is a long time."Link pushed further. If there was a chance the Prince could help him recover this memory, he would take it. "Do you remember me when I was younger?"Sidon smiled down at him with a toothy grin "Of course! Though I was quite young at the time. I remember you spent the summers at the Domain.""Anything stand out from those summers?"Sidon looked back up at his sister. For a long moment he seemed deep in thought, though his face was mournful."No," he finally said. "Only that they were happy."Link’s disappointment was palpable, though he understood Sidon’s lack of recollection. The Prince had lived a long life, numbering many more years than Link. One incident on an afternoon among an archive of summer afternoons probably stood out no more than what the Prince took for supper the night before.Not wanting to ruminate on this sullen mood, he excused himself from Sidon's company, and headed for Dento's workshop.Dento was adding the finishing touches to the fletching of the specially-made crossbow bolts. He insisted on doing this one task for Link, since as he put it, fletching was an art that was significantly more complex than sticking some damned Rito feathers to a stick. And, that if Link wanted to learn, it would take much longer than the week he had left at the Domain. Less than a week now, Link realised with an inward frown. He took a bundle of bolts and gave the old Zora his sincere thanks, promising to donate a month’s supply of luminous stones before he had to leave the Domain as payment.“No, mining those stones is Fronk and Ledo’s job anyway,” Dento said. He motioned to the crossbow hanging on Link’s belt. “Your payment will be letting me inspect that contraption of yours.”He gave the weapon a once over, checking its mechanisms, the tension on its string, the make of the wood. "You learn quickly," he noted. "You would have made a good apprentice."“Thank you, sir. Sadly I already have a vocation.”“And I have two half hopeless apprentices. You would think combined they would make one useful one but... no matter. Go, Champion Link, I can tell duty calls.”Link crossed the domain and made for Vah Ruta, intending to practise with the crossbow there. It had been abandoned of late, with neither the Zora nor Zelda going near it on account of the malice and the diplomatic problems between the Princess and their hosts. But the problem of the octorok infestation below Zora’s Domain remained, and Link was determined to fix that at least. If only he could get the crossbow to work…The entire walk, Link looped Dento's words in his head. Perhaps he could have been a good apprentice. And maybe later, weaponsmith, and a jeweller, and the successor of an old Zora sage. He could have spent more than just the summers in the Domain. He could have built a life. In time, making jewellery for his would-be wife, and sitting in the sun with his brother-in-law in a Kingdom wholly encompassed by peace. Is that what I wanted? He wouldn't ever know now.Link pushed the thoughts away, down beneath the chorus of other worries. The haunting dream, Sidon, the Princess...even by day he was filled with dread, lost in a place he knew he should know. And for all the summers, long afternoons, and days in the sun that he had spent at Zora's Domain, none of it felt real. None of it felt familiar. But at least - at least - he could be alone up on Ruta's Plateau, with his crossbow contraption and two dozen octo balloons ripe to become targets.And of course when he came over the lip of luminous wind-weathered rock at the edge of the wide plateau, he saw her, and her crown of sun-gold hair.Zelda felt her pointed ears burning before she even heard the crunching of rock under boots. Evidently the peace found at Ruta's Plateau was not to last.He was carrying that strange contraption of his and was marching determinedly across the rocky shore of the watery plateau where Vah Ruta was perched. That was until he saw her, at which point he froze, bowed quickly, and turned right around to leave.“Wait! I was just going,” Zelda called after him, jogging to catch him. “Don’t leave on my account.”Link opened his mouth to speak, but just frowned.“It’s fine. I should go see Sidon, anyway,” Zelda added.“You didn’t, this morning?” Link asked."I planned to. But Sidon is not the only thing important to the Zora that is fading,” She looked up to Vah Ruta, whose vital readings shown on the Sheikah Slate were growing quieter by the day. “The Travel Gate on Vah Ruta is still active, for now."The sight of Vah Ruta seemed to trigger panic in Link’s face. "Don’t come here alone. It's dangerous."Zelda laughed. "Please - Lady Ruta can't even move, let alone hurt anyone.""No – I mean, Sidon was attacked here."The cool air up on the plateau suddenly became a bone chill. Zelda met Link’s eyes, examining his face; no, he was not trying to rile her up."Well that's the first I've heard,” she said, her accusation deliberate. “What do you mean he was attacked?""That's why he’s injured. Something attacked him in Vah Ruta. Or someone.”“You could have mentioned this.”“I wasn’t hiding it from you,” he scratched the back of his neck, eyes low. “I’ve had… other things on my mind.” “I’m sure you have. And I’m sure it was just another privileged conversation between yourself and the Zora.”She knew immediately the words had been too harsh. Ashamed, Zelda turned away from Link’s gaze, eyes listlessly following the horizon. She mumbled an apology, too mad at herself to really mean it. She heard Link sigh, and pause maybe to consider saying something equally callous in return, only to decide not to and walk away. Gravelly footsteps receding behind her told Zelda that Link had departed her company.Overhead, the sun crept towards the western skies. Zelda tried to focus on simply enjoying a respite by the deep pool of water as she idly watched Ruta's readings transmitted through her Sheikah Slate. Ruta was stable - still in a low energy state and entirely immobile - but in no danger of malfunctioning or breaking down. The Divine Beast could rest on the plateau for another hundred years, so long as the Malice within her never breached her ancient walls. Eventually, Ruta would simply fall into a deep sleep, until another great power – perhaps another Princess another 10,000 years from now – found a way to wake her.There was a rustling noise on the other side of the plateau, and the floating sound of hushed mutterings coming. Zelda peered around to see that Link was not only still here, but he was busy lining up a row of octo balloons, as if they were ducks for the hunt. He then measured out a ten-step firing line, and raised, loaded, and fired that crossbow of his. A bolt soared past the bloated balloons, whistling almost pathetically as it disappeared into the valley. He pulled another from his quiver: draw, load, pwiiiish. Draw, load, phwap! One of the balloons exploded into fuschia-coloured scraps of rubber innards."Huh, he got it to work," Zelda muttered to herself.She turned back towards Ruta, not wanting to stare. From what she heard however, the crossbow was not yet firing true. More of the bolts yielded a long whistle rather than a pop, followed by a few grumbles of frustration from the knight. He'll run out of arrows soon, she realised. Perhaps a small peace offering was in order.Tapping through the menus of the Sheikah Slate, Zelda pulled up the inventory function, and selected three regular arrows. They materialised above the slate in a bundle of shining blue light and fell into her lap. Not entirely sure what she was doing, Zelda snapped each arrow in half, and kept the fletched pieces. And then - still unsure, with her hand unsteady - she held the splintered tips up to her right palm, breathed deep, and used her fledgling powers to sear the arrows with a concentrated pulse of energy. She cleared her mind, feeling the world around her blacken as all other distractions fell away, and focused her power into something that could mould as well as burn. She felt a click - a disconnect - as the world slipped away underneath her. It lasted no longer than a blink. And then it was done, the splintered tips were rounded and consolidated, the wood of the arrows strengthened, and in her hands she held three makeshift crossbow bolts.She sprang to her feet, forgetting that she and Link hadn't exchanged a single word in the past hour."I did it!" she exclaimed as she bounded over. "Look!"From his reaction, it was possible he had forgotten she was even there. He spun on his heel, his right hand reaching instinctively for the sword on his back, and he seemed to freeze when he saw her.She held out the trio of bolts. "Take them, I want to see if they work!"Wide-eyed, the knight looked down at the bolts, and then back to her. "You made these?""Mm. I think maybe the technique can be refined, and if I'm honest it made me feel quite dizzy, but they should be--""You made these for me?"Zelda nodded, worried that she'd done a horrible job; that her makeshift bolts looked ridiculous and were entirely unusable. Link took one from her hands, spun it around deftly to examine her handiwork, and then nocked it into the crossbow. In his row of balloons there were only three left. After a second to aim, he fired, and an octo balloon disappeared with a succinct phwap!Link took another bolt from her hands and loaded it into the crossbow. He was smiling now too, smiling at her. Was she smiling back? She hoped so.Link fired at the second last octo balloon, and again the bolt easily found its target. Then the third, and the last octo balloon was no more."Like magic," he breathed."Like magic," Zelda agreed.She watched him silently as he inspected his crossbow, checking it for damage or problems she supposed, until he hooked it back to his belt.“How is Sidon,” Zelda asked suddenly.“The same. I think.”“I’ll try again with the power. Ease his pain.” "Kind of you, to do that.”"Well, I have learned this week that I cannot force myself upon a solution. If I cannot heal him, or Vah Ruta, then I can at least make them comfortable.”Link gazed solemnly out over the landscape. "Make them comfortable,” he repeated knowingly."I'm sorry," Zelda said. "I was - last week - I’ve been unfair. And rude. And very prideful. And now your friend is very ill.""Our friend. Sidon is our friend," Link said quietly.He lifted his head and met her eyes with his own; Zelda felt her breath hitch. She had nearly forgotten the fierceness that hid behind those calm blue eyes of his - the way they saw, as well as looked. "I should have been looking out for you,” he said. “Helping you with the Zora."“You had no obligation. I’m just… glad you were here at all.”A red-orange light had swept across the sky, smooth as a painter's brush. The aquamarine rocks of Ruta's Plateau were tinged with a radiant amber hue, and the waters of the Zora River below sparkled under the waning light. They stood together, watching the changing colours, a peace having settled between them. This is how it should be, Zelda thought, and she felt that perhaps Link was feeling it too.After a time, and with reluctance, Zelda broke the silence. "Does Sidon really have a fanclub?" she asked shyly.Link chuckled. "Oh, he does," he grinned. And then Zelda was laughing too, their soft giggles echoing down the canyon, between the rocks and crags, to the river below.
Day Five
Their routine changed. For the third day since their reconciliation, Link and Zelda left Vah Ruta undisturbed. In the mornings, they broke their fast with Sidon, before Zelda administered her magical treatment. Sadly it didn't seem to be healing the infection, and if it was slowing it, they could not tell. But Sidon reported that it numbed the pain almost entirely, and that the moments when his friends came to visit were (thus far) the best he had lived in his entire life. Zelda noted his enthusiasm and joy like committing formulas to memory, hoping to store and reuse it later. The weight in her chest felt heavier than ever somehow, and no matter the minor happiness she found during the day.In the afternoons, she helped Link modify arrows for his crossbow. He was still learning to fire it with accuracy and speed, so her job as part of his crossbow training was snapping regular arrows in half and burning the splintered shaft with her powers. Perhaps she did something else to them - made them shoot straighter, or swifter, but she couldn't quite tell. Then they would hike to Ruta's Plateau together, tie octo balloons along the cliff's edge, and Zelda would watch as the knight dispatched the balloons one by one, keeping an eye on Ruta's readings to make sure that she truly was stable. By the third day, Link determined that he was ready to take on the octoroks that still lived.And in the evenings, Zelda sought out however many Zora that would talk to her. Guards, children, shopkeepers, and nobles -- she found them walking in the plaza, or resting in their water baths, or patrolling the bridges, and boldly as she could, introduced herself. For those that would talk to her, she pried them for stories on the past one hundred years, and the state of the Domain. It took a little while, but eventually some began to open up, and Zelda committed their stories to memory. They spoke of how Hylian visitors to the Domain had dwindled over the years, how lizalfos and moblins seemed to encroach closer to their home every day, how some Zora wanted to strike out and create settlements on the Necludan coast, but were afraid of the salt water. Jiahto, who Zelda recognised as one of King Dorephan’s advisors, took great interest in her questions, proclaiming himself to be Zora’s Domain’s finest historian. He happily rattled off stories of old Zoran kings and their exploits, but when she asked him of the Calamity, his voice grew soft and thin, like a fine mesh, only permitting the smallest fragments of memory through.“We watched Hyrule Field burn for years,” he said. “We could smell it. I can’t remember exactly when it stopped, only that eventually it did, and now the youngsters that travel from the Domain come home to tell us that where whole towns once stood, there is only grass.”He spoke to her little after this, but not all of Zelda’s enquiries yielded pain and memories of the past. Somewhere along the way, she became the unwitting second-ever Hylian to join the Prince Sidon fan club."Pardon, but who was the first?" she asked the garnet-skinned Zoran woman named Tula who had swiftly spotted, recruited and inducted her within the space of a few minutes."Link, of course!" Tula giggled. "At this rate, we'll sign up a third in no time."Why does none of this surprise me? Zelda thought to herself, having begrudgingly agreed to the next club meetup in a week’s time.Link of course, denied the allegation outright. She interrogated him as they sat together in one of the gazebos, taking a supper of grilled salt-fish at the end of the fifth day. Link avoided her question by stuffing his face with fish every time she asked."I didn't realise the Prince was so popular. Is he betrothed?"With a mouth full of fish, Link had no option but to shrug."No, you must know, you talk to him all the time."Link shook his head, mumbling a "nope" through full cheeks."I know you're lying," Zelda squinted at him. "I’m on to you, Hero."He looked at her with coy, innocent eyes, before digging into another morsel of fish.
Day Six
On the sixth day, their morning session with Sidon never came to be. Zelda met Link at the Inn, and as they walked towards the infirmary together, the quiet of the morning was shattered by a frightful wail that echoed throughout the Domain. It was one of the nurses; she came scrambling into the Plaza, and raced over to Link and Zelda."Champion! Champion! Princess!" she cried, her hands balled into fists. "The Prince!"They both sprinted to the infirmary, splashing through the watery halls with frantic desperation. But there was nothing to be done. Sidon was comatose, and both Zelda and Link's attempts to wake him were in vain. Even a last-ditch use of Mipha's Grace did nothing. Looking to Zelda, Link saw determination on her face, despite the tears drifting down her cheeks. He could tell the cogs were turning, as her instinct to find a solution - any solution - kicked in. He felt his instincts rise as well, wanting nothing more than to protect both her and Sidon. The web of Malice around the Prince's arm pulsed angrily, the putrid fluid of corruption churning under his skin. It was almost enough to make Link vomit.One of the Zora nurses was overcome with emotion, and through tears she cried, "What do we do!?""What can we do?" Zelda said calmly. "That is the better question."The Princess suddenly turned to leave, and Link followed hurriedly behind. They burst into the central chamber of Zora's Domain, interrupting a meeting between the King and his retainers. They sat around a long table, huddled in close and each startled at the sudden banging open of the chamber door."King Dorephan!" Zelda called out. She did not bow. "It's Sidon."The King seemed to ignore them, muttering in a low voice to his retainers. But then he stood, his face expressionless."I am aware," he said flatly, as if the news was no more a bother than a passing darner dragonfly.Was it because his court was here? Link wondered. His own son, his only son, about to be lost and here he was, stoic and unmoved.Zelda was breathless. "It's the Malice. I'm worried he doesn't have long." She kneeled then, dropping to her knees. Link followed suit, unsure what else to do."We are due to leave the day after tomorrow, but I beg of you that we are given more time to treat Sidon," Zelda pleaded."Princess Zelda, believe me when I say we are grateful for your assistance, but the Prince has been unaffected by your methods.""Then allow us to board Vah Ruta. The Malice in her can be destroyed somehow, I’m sure of it. And once we figure it out, we can use the same method to save Sidon!"The King shook his head. “All entry to Vah Ruta is forbidden. After what has happened to Sidon it is clear that is not longer safe.”"We don't have a choice, as I recall you saying, Princess," interjected Muzu from his place at the table. He sneered, laughing at his own words."But you do!" the Princess retorted. “Sidon may not make it beyond tomorrow! We may be able to heal him!”"We have no proof that what you are saying is true," Muzu returned her fire.“I have none, but I beg you to let me try to help you!”“Why!? Why should we do that?”Zelda was on her feet now. She pointed to the east. "The reservoir! Built 10,000 years ago by our ancestors, as a sign of the bond between our kingdoms. Vah Ruta herself threatened to overtop the reservoir only a year ago, and it was Link and Sidon who appeased her and averted disaster! That the dam still stands is testament; we are strongest when we help each other!"“She is right,” said advisor Jiahto. “Hylian stonemasons helped design the reservoir, and it has survived everything from the Calamity, to a rogue Divine Beast, not to mention the earthquake a century past.”“And what does any of that have to do with our Prince’s current condition, hm Jiahto?” Muzu said. The old historian mumbled indignantly to himself, and soon the whole table was a flock of mutterings and frowns.Zelda stood with her head held high the entire time, never looking away from King Dorephan. “I am willing to step aside for your customs, King Dorephan, but I will not step aside for my friend!”“I’m sorry, but you must.” Dorephan frowned. “I will not risk another person being injured by that Beast. I cannot allow anyone, even you, to board her.”“As Princess, I–”“Hyrule is gone, Zelda,” King Dorephan said, gently. “Princess you may be but, your jurisdiction here has ceased. This matter… is no longer your concern.”There was nothing more to be said, as the King turned away from them, and his council, the glistening of tears in his old eyes. As quick as they had burst in, Link and Zelda slipped silently from the council room, defeated.Unable to do anything else, Zelda sat vigil by Sidon's side in the infirmary, her hands wrapped around his as though by will alone she could heal him.There must be something we can do, Link thought. He needed a solution fast, or Sidon's likeness would join his sister's in the plaza, and likely the Zora and Hylians would never again be allies. Whatever they were going to do, they were going to do it tonight – the King’s blessing be damned. But even if they went back to Vah Ruta, the damn Divine Beast was still impossible to traverse, perched on its forelegs with its entire interior at a harsh angle.There are choices made when we have no choice at all. Zelda’s words. She certainly had a way with them. Well, perhaps there was one last choice that Link could make.Quietly, he quietly asked to borrow the Sheikah Slate - Zelda simply nodded, her attention fixed on Sidon. And when enough time had passed that she would not notice him leave, Link snuck away from the infirmary. He opened the Sheikah Slate map, and found the small glowing symbol that marked Vah Ruta’s travel gate. He activated the teleport function, and held his breath.If he was going to be honest with himself, he had no real plan. Instead he decided to used a method that seemed to epitomise his life so far: he went back to the start.He stood at the flooded entry to the chamber that housed Ruta's main control unit, and watched the pulsing blue glow of the terminal. Zelda had rightly pointed out when they first came here that Link had no knowledge on how to pilot Vah Ruta. But if he could just move her somehow, force her to stand so that she was more easily explored, then perhaps their research into the Malice could start again in earnest. And from there, they would have one day to figure it out…Determined, Link crouched at the water's edge, and closed his eyes to focus. He drew out the image of a soaring Rito and the feeling of a great gale, and felt the surge of power as a rushing updraft erupted underneath him. The Rito Champion's sardonic face came to mind as Link whipped out his paraglider and was launched towards the ceiling of the chamber, high above the flooding waters. Deep down below the main control unit continued its rhythmic blinking, and after taking a second to line himself up, Link let go of his paraglider.The water surged upwards to meet him, and he broke through the surface with a clean dive, tearing through the dark waters. The faint glow of the main control unit had become a shining beacon of light, and Link swam with all of his strength down towards the terminal. He held the Sheikah Slate out in front of him as he fought his way down, and revelled in the rush of adrenaline that came from the icy waters and daring dive. For them, he thought as he felt his lungs begin to give out. For Mipha...for Sidon...for Zelda.The terminal flashed a brilliant orange and blue as finally, Link reached it with the Sheikah Slate. Immediately, he felt an earth-shattering rumble that shook the entire chamber. And then he was slammed into the main control unit, the pitch back waters rushing past him and out towards Ruta's stern. It's working! He realised. He had to grip onto the control unit to stop from being flushed out of the chamber through the wide windows that lined Ruta’s outer walls, but eventually the waters receded almost entirely, exposing the main control unit to air at last. Link toppled down onto the stone platform surrounding the terminal, and coughed violently as he gasped for breath.And then it was over. He lay on the platform - soaking wet and exhausted - until his breath returned to him and he found the strength to stand. But when he stood, he saw that somehow by the Goddess's grace, his plan had worked. For the first time in nearly half a year, Vah Ruta floated level with the waters that surrounded her, and the flooding waters that had prevented piloting her were entirely gone.He looked around the large chamber, and found it almost entirely clear of Malice. And then he saw, tucked away in the corner - perhaps having always been there, or perhaps having been washed into the chamber by the receding waters - a shining silver bracelet, adorned with the shape of a heart.
It was the summer he turned eighteen. The last summer he would ever see in Zora's Domain, and he was finally starting to look, and feel, like an adult. His friends, the youth of the Zora, had always marvelled at the speed at which he grew, as he returned at the end of each spring a few inches taller and a decent amount stronger. Though to his frustration he was never able to outpace them in the waters. The boys - Rivan, Gaddison, and their leader Bazz - always insisted on challenging him to races through Zora River, taunting him that this time might be the first time he wins.
And it was Mipha who was the voice of reason. She and her friend Kodah had always tried to talk him out of it, but he never listened. He was nearly a man, and freshly accepted in the Knight Order at Hyrulean Academy like his father and father's father before him. However this summer brought new things to attract his attention - for suddenly the Princess of the Zoras’ calm pleas for him to stay back with her were more appealing than the glory of out-swimming the group of Zora boys. Her little brother Sidon, still a small fry, had followed them down to the Bank of Wishes southwest of Zora's Domain, and was mumbling happily to himself as he dangled his feet in the waters.
They'd been sitting together on the bank, shoulders just kissing, and Link felt like either his chest was going to give out or he was going to be sick. If this was what love was, he wasn't sure if he couldn't get enough, or wanted it to just go away. Mipha didn't seem to notice his internal panic, and was focused on examining one of her bracelets. A slender silverite bangle fashioned into the shape of a love heart, it had been pinching her skin at the hinge, and so she'd removed it. As Link and Mipha sat together, chatting quietly and enjoying the sun, Sidon caught sight of a fox around the bend of the bank, and darted away to chase after it. His big sister leaped to her feet to chase after him, and judging by her exasperated pleas, was struggling to catch him. The siblings disappeared around the bend, and Link was alone. He picked up the little bracelet, and admired the workmanship.
That was when they turned up. The whole crew: Bazz, Rivan, Gaddison, and Kodah, all racing through the waters.
"Whatcha got there, Linny?" Kodah called to him as the four of them advanced up the bank.
"What's this?" Bazz teased, plucking the bracelet from Link's hands. "Hey, this is Mipha's."
Kodah, the largest of the four, snatched the bracelet at once from Bazz’s hands. He glowered at Link. "Did she give this to you?"
Link opened his mouth to speak, but Kodah cut him off. "Wouldn't want to lose this, would we, Linny? She’d be pretty mad at you for that."
Link moved to take the bracelet back, but the taller Zora held it out of reach, snorting with laughter as Link jumped to try and retrieve it. The other Zora were laughing too, until Kodah’s face suddenly dropped, and with his free hand he shoved Link to the ground.
Link looked to the others for help, but they stepped back, just as afraid of Kodah as he was.
"She'll never be yours, Hylian," Kodah spat. "You're just a novelty to her, and it wouldn't matter either way - your kind die well before ours."
Later, Link wouldn't recall leaping to his feet and tackling the Zora boy, but the fierce bruises that spotted his body in the fight's aftermath would tell the story well enough.
It went on until Mipha's voice rang out through the valley. "Stop!"
Link and Kodah sprang apart, the bracelet all but forgotten. They both mumbled hurried apologies, but the Princess ignored them. Sidon in tow, she walked over to the edge of the bank, and pulled her bracelet free of the mud and silt where it had become lodged, entirely forgotten in the fight. And Link saw, marking one of the heart shapes, a visible dent and scratch. Mipha ran a finger over the bracelet, tracing the spot where it had been damaged.
"Come, Link," she said, ignoring the other Zora entirely. "It's time I escorted you back to your family."
Link picked up Mipha's bracelet from its resting place in Vah Ruta, and thumbed a small black dent that marred one of the heart shapes. The memory it conjured was a diamond among the dirt. A single piece of clarity in a muddied world. Mipha had never even scolded him, never snapped, never so much as expressed her disappointment. They had walked back to Zora's Domain together, where she took his hand in her own and apologised for the behaviour of the other Zora.It's just a scratch she had said, slipping the bracelet back on. Something we can look back on, and laugh about. She must have kept the bracelet ever since. She must have died wearing it.The dam broke, and the sea of regrets and sorrow that Link had been holding in spilled out of him. He nearly dropped the bracelet again, seized by a twisting feeling in his chest. It was worse than a punch to the gut, worse than the uncountable times he'd been knocked off of his feet. He was completely winded, gasping like a fish drowning in the sun. He fell to his knees, and his tears mixed with the shallow waters that filled the chamber.The sobs racked him; they came in unceasing and rolling heaves like waves on a stormy sea. It was enough to pull him under, and maybe that was what he wanted. After a time though, he quieted to soft whimpers, and eventually silence as a feeling of numbness encased him. The worst part of it all was that he couldn't quite grasp what made him feel like this. Just like everything else, it was just out of reach. Mipha had been important to him, but the specifics, the familiarity and comfort of really loving someone were not there, and that alone was torture.A new round of tears followed, though this time they brought no sobs; just a dull sense of pain. After a time, he closed his eyes."Link?"Her voice pulled him back to earth with a thud. Link startled to his feet, his hand instinctively reaching back for his sword, as if she could ever do him any harm. She was carrying a small lantern, and Link realised that night had fallen. How long...?"I heard that Vah Ruta had moved, and I came as soon as I could. When I saw that you’d righted her I waded out. Dorephan might have forbidden it but, well he’s posted no guards."Link couldn't speak. There was no place he could begin. His face was still puffy and red from the tears, and his body raw from the pain. He couldn't even look at her. She stepped towards him, the lantern illuminating her face with a harsh shadow. "Link? Are you okay?"Zelda stepped forward again, and Link backed away from her, still unable to look her in the eye. "Don't," he sobbed. "Please."Link heard her slot the lantern onto her belt. She must have seen Mipha's bracelet in his hand, as well as the tears on his cheeks, for she sighed. "Oh. Oh, no...I'm so sorry, Link."Zelda wrapped her hands around his, lifting them so that she could look at the bracelet. It glittered in the light from her lantern, and Link felt another surge of grief."It's beautiful," Zelda murmured. "And so elegant. Just like her to wear something like this."Link nodded with a sniff. Zelda let go of his hands, though he could not move, and stood holding the bracelet between them. He looked up, slowly meeting her eyes, and saw the pity and sorrow written on her face. It sent a wave of embarrassment through him. She should never have seen this side of him. No one ever had."I think...I think I did love her. Why else would I feel...?" his voice trailed off into a weak mutter."There is no grief without passion," Zelda offered softly, looking down at the bracelet. "My governess told me that when… when Mother died. And no passion without grief, she said."“But I barely remember her!” Link cried, letting out a reedy laugh. “And yet I’m…”He shook against another sob. “I don't want these memories. Take them away, please.""Link…""I mean, don’t you ever feel like it's unfair? That we lived?""Of course. Every day,” Zelda answered, the honesty surprising him. “Every single day. Wondering why the Goddess chose to keep me alive when so much of it was my fault.”"It wasn’t," Link said firmly. He lowered his hands, collecting himself enough to take Mipha’s bracelet, and store it in the Sheikah Slate inventory. With some relief, he watched it fade into gentle blue tendrils of light.“I suppose it doesn’t matter now,” Zelda sighed. She looked around the chamber, turning to observe the entire room. "You piloted Vah Ruta. Or perhaps, Mipha programmed in a sort of reset. Once Ruta's job was done, the main control unit could be scanned to return her to a neutral state.""Sounds like something she'd do.”"You didn't have to do this alone. Activating the terminal couldn't have been easy."Link’s grief was receding, and no matter what he felt in that moment, they had work to do. He walked over towards the main control unit, taking out the Sheikah Slate. "Perhaps it's time we work together on this," he said. "We have until tomorrow to clear out the Malice.""You’re right. I only wish I’d asked for your help earlier," Zelda said as jogged to join him. "I didn't know you’d want to help my research."Link shrugged. "Neither did I."Zelda stood in the now-righted central chamber of Vah Ruta, once again examining a wretched pool of Malice. It gurgled angrily, even in the low light from the lantern.Link stood at her side. "Alright, so I've had an idea for a while.""Tell me."The knight drew the Master Sword. Zelda couldn't stop herself. "We've gone over this, the Sword--"He held up a finger, and then outstretched his free hand. "Take it.""Your hand…?"Link nodded. Cautiously, Zelda obliged. His hand was warm, a welcome source of heat in the chilly Divine Beast. Night had well and truly fallen by that point, and Zelda dreaded making the hike back to the Domain in the dark."There's a Rito bard who helped me out, when I was travelling around," Link explained. "His songs always had some meaning. And he had one last one to give me, right before I came to get you.""What did he say?" Zelda asked with trepidation."’The hero - the princess - hand in hand, must bring light to the land.’""An interesting verse. You think it was a message?"Link just shrugged. "It's not much to go on.""Maybe it wasn't this literal," Zelda pondered. She was beginning to feel uneasy simply standing there hand in hand. "But what if? What if it means we need to work together, like you said." She turned to face him, pulling her hand away from his with a sense of relief. "You're the hero. What does the hero do?"Link thought for a second. "...kill things?" She shot him an unimpressed scowl. "Wield the Master Sword?" he offered."Okay. And what does the princess do?""Boss Link around.""Excuse me?""I mean - magic. The Princess does magic."The sword, and the magic. It seemed too easy, but why need it be so complex? For so long her own powers had eluded her, and day by day they were becoming second nature."Maybe that's it," she concluded, the creeping sense of realisation growing within her. "We've tried the sword, and we've tried magic. But never both together."Link nodded, and held the Master Sword in out in front of him, the blade pointing downwards. He wrapped both hands around the hilt, and motioned for her to do the same."The sword that seals the darkness," he said."And the sealing power of the princess," Zelda finished, wrapping her hands around his. "Sounds so obvious, doesn't it?"Link looked down at the sword. "So...what do we--""Just focus on the sword and on the power that it carries. I think I can manage the rest."The knight nodded, and closed his eyes. Zelda followed, and focused her power to the blade of the sword that they wielded together. She felt the heat rising through the hilt, and just as before, felt herself spliced from the fabric of reality. She focused on the light - and on the small morsels of joy she had felt during her life - and an enduring wish to see Vah Ruta returned to her true state. Though she could not see it, she could sense an intense aura of energy and light beginning to emanate from the sword at the point where hers and Link's hands crossed. Thoughts raced through her mind unbridled as she drew on every feeling she had to bolster her power.
My mother surrounded by light. My father at the height of his reign. My knight ready to die so that I may live. My kingdom returned to the sun.
Zelda opened her eyes and saw that all around them was a blinding golden light. It surged outwards, enveloping the entire chamber, and soon, the entire Divine Beast itself. Link's eyes opened slowly as well, and went wide as he marvelled at what he saw.Around them, the shining sphere shattered, and before the light could even begin to dim, Zelda collapsed against the stone floor.She came to bundled up in Link's arms, the soft sounds of his voice pulling her back into consciousness."You did it," he was saying. "You did it!”Sundered by the ritual, and struggling to anchor herself in the present, Zelda gazed up sleepily at the ceiling of Vah Ruta. She sat up gingerly, and peered around the room, and her hazy curiosity gradually turned to awe.There was not a single trace of Malice anywhere to be seen. Every pool and growth was gone, and somehow the air inside Vah Ruta was purer. The Divine Beast seemed as if she was just as new--the way she could have been 10,000 years ago.Link and Zelda caught each other's eyes, and before they could say anything else, a single name was on both their lips."Sidon!"
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
Elsewhere…
Secretary Milagre of the Yiga considered pouring herself another cup of wildwine to stop from going mad before the night was over, but somehow she doubted that any more Gerudo liquor would calm her. She had spent the entire evening listening to the Elders of the Yiga argue about when their Chancellor Leilo would return and was beginning to think that age did not correlate with wisdom."Surely Leilo will return by the end of the week!" said Elder Grihan, a plump man who barely fit into his stealth suit."No, not possible," said Elder Totin, shaking his balding head. "Another storm lies on the horizon, bigger than the most recent one. He will not return unless that boy Inglis drags him back here on a sled if need be.""Don't be ridiculous, you old fool," Grihan spat."You're one to call me a fool, Grihan," Totin retorted."You’re both fools" cried the shrill and wiry Elder Barne. “Leilo has already chosen the candidates to run for Master, and that his journey into the desert is merely a sabbatical in disguise.”“Absurd!” snorted Totin.“He might have a point,” Grihan countered.“No, he mightn’t. Leilo wouldn’t do that to us!”“To you he probably would!”Milagre found herself wondering how these men had reached such a high level in the Yiga Hierarchy. As Secretary, protocol was that she sat with them at banquets, and so she was trapped with them and their bickering around a Highland timber table, on a large stone dais at the head of the dining hall within Karusa Valley. The Yiga Hideout extended deeper into the desert stone that one might imagine; as much as Milagre wanted to slip away and feel the night air, the desert beyond was too far out of reach.A fourth elder, Chaplain Tieo, was slumped over the table next to Milagre, passed out from too much to drink. She regarded him with disdain. As Chaplain he was meant to lead the teachings of the Yiga's philosophy and history - the evils of the Shiekah and the Royal Family and so on - though since the Calamity his job was far from burdensome, and his philosophy seemed not to extend very far beyond the nearest cup of wine.Milagre’s attention drifted aimlessly from the head table. A mingling of fully-trained bladed Yiga, acolytes, and stewards sat below; the bladed ones in their traditional red soldier's garb, and the others in loose white training gear. She had never seen so many of them at once; Chancellor Leilo had recalled all the bladed Yiga to Karusa Valley for an emergency election of a new Master and every evening was a banquet both loud and long. There were several dozen bladed Yiga in all, and half as many stewards and acolytes, all as boastful and chaotic as each other. The bladed ones bragged and brawled - one blademaster claimed to have met the Hero near Hateno, and another tried to duel him for stealing his story - while the impressionable, still-in-training stewards and acolytes lapped up every tall tale. All of them were insatiably drunk, and each night was the same circus of wine and fighting. This is what Leilo brought upon us, before disappearing into the desert, Milagre lamented.The slamming sound of a cup hitting the table drew her attention back to the squabbling Elders, who were now near shouting, banging their cutlery and crockery about to try and drown each other out. There was hush in the hall, until the other Yiga determined that nothing was amiss and their infinite chatter and banter began again."Does any of this truly matter?" Milagre said, unable to contain herself any longer."No - it should not matter to you, Secretary Milagre," Elder Barne agreed. He shifted in his cushioned seat and extended a wrinkled hand to give her a gentle pat on the arm. "The election of the new Master is out of your hands.""Be fair, Barne," Grihan cut in. "Secretary Milagre is a proud Yiga, born in this very Valley, and will stay that way no matter who is voted Master. Won't you, child?"It took all her strength not to throw Grihan across the table then, as she pictured the way his pudgy form would bounce clumsily into a nearby table. She’d gladly wipe the floor with all four of the elders at the table if it meant an end to their prattling."But in your impartial view, Secretary Milagre, I am correct, surely?" continued Totin. “The storm. Leilo won’t return until the new moon.”Milagre ignored him. She wondered about Leilo, but worried more for his attendant, the steward Inglis. He was barely more than a child, and had been sent out into the desert with Leilo as though he were born to it. Milagre had begged Inglis not to go, to stay until he was strong enough for the task. The steward had not listened, intent on going, and departed into the desert with Chancellor Leilo and a sled full of supplies the next morning.Milagre felt as though her guts were swimming with poison just thinking about it, as though the room were spinning and her cup of wildwine was the only thing holding her in place. She shook from the nerves, torn with twin emotions of exasperation and anxiety.At last - at last! - a voice cried out from the hall's entrance."Elders! Chaplain! Come quick!"This time the hall fell silent. Milagre turned to look, her face steeled to hide her relief. Standing under the high stone archway leading into the hall, perhaps a little more tan than she had last seen him, and with longer hair, was the steward Inglis of Akkala. He motioned urgently towards the door, his face awash with fear. Grihan, Totin, and Barne all leapt from their chairs, and Milagre followed as quickly as she could. Chaplain Tieo did not stir."Inglis?" Grihan said, incredulous."Elders Grihan," the young steward bowed quickly. "Totin, Barne. I have terrible news."It was just as Milagre expected. Inglis and the Chancellor were set upon at their hideout near the Gerudo Highlands by a deserter, and Leilo had not survived. Inglis however, through strength and will alone, had detained the murderer and brought him to the valley.It was almost too much for the Elders. "You brought that deserter?" Grihan demanded. "Here!?"Inglis retreated from the doorway into the shadowy hallway beyond. Milagre had to crane her neck to see past the group of men before her - but there he was. His hands bound in frayed rope and his mouth gagged with a dusty cloth, the deserter was tied to a sled that Milagre presumed had been dragged all the way into the hideout. His red hair was tossed about and seemed aflame, and his dark eyes leered at them angrily.Inglis marched over to the deserter, and ripped the gag from his mouth."My, my," Grihan hummed. He stalked over to the sled, his long burgundy Elders' robes trailing behind him. "Deserter, you live."The deserter met the Elder with an unwavering scowl. "Glad you missed me," he grimaced, his voice low. Despite being bound, he looked relaxed, sedate even. Elder Grihan hovered over him, and for a second seemed poised to strike him.Inglis shifted his weight, clearly noting the tension and disgust of the Yiga Elders. "What shall with we do with him, Elder?" he asked Grihan.Milagre stepped forward. "Bring him into the hall - show the others what happens to deserters."Grihan nodded in approval, and Inglis dragged the deserter in by his still-tied hands. For the second time that evening, the dining hall fell silent. Those who remembered the deserter either smiled in predatory pleasure, or gaped in awe that he still lived. The rest could not stop their muttering, and whispers of curiosity.Elder Grihan stepped up on the dais at the head of the room and raised his hands to quiet the whispering."Cast your eyes towards what has darkened our doorstep this night. A deserter! A traitor! The absolute worst of the Yiga! He came to us as a boy, and we took him in, and in response he murdered our previous Secretary and fled! And now – he has repeated this act against our revered Chancellor Leilo! But he won’t get away again, for we as Yiga have–"Grihan was not given a chance to continue. As if by magic, the deserter's ropes had disappeared, and he leapt away from his captors, disappearing into the dark hallway. The dining hall erupted with cacophonous shouts."Catch him!" shrieked Milagre. "He must not escape again!" A similar cry to action was echoed by Inglis and the other Elders. All at once, every steward, acolyte, and bladed Yiga jumped from their chairs; the bladed ones disappeared into ethereal red puffs of smoke, while the stewards and acolytes spilled into the hallway. The Yiga stalked their territory with single-minded purpose. Hatred for deserters ran thick, matched almost by their hatred of the Hero.Minutes dragged on as the Yiga continued their fruitless search. Milagre had moved to stand by Inglis at the entrance of the hideout, away from the roving mass of Yiga intent on dispatching the traitor. Gloomy moonlight flooded the narrow valley, and shadows danced as the Yiga crawled over every rock and crevice searching for the red-headed deserter."At the signal," Milagre said to Inglis."Good to see you too, Mila," Inglis teased. She elbowed his side, yet for a moment entwined her hand with his.From the far end of the valley, Milagre heard the piercing sounds of a war-horn."That's it," Inglis murmured, and Milagre nodded in response, retreating silently into the hideout.Behind her, the massacre had began. It echoed through the whole of Karusa Valley itself. The whistling noises of arrows, the clang of carvers and sickles, and the screams of her clan mates. She stood in the hallway a moment, breathless. Even after planning it for so long, their cries and wails as the Yiga fell shocked her. Was this really the end of it? She paused in the hallway for a moment, allowing her eyes to well with tears and frantic hysteria to creep into her voice."Elders," she sobbed, stumbling once more into the now vacant dining hall. "T-the worst has happened!"Grihan, Totin, and Barne were crowded around their table, with Chaplain Tieo still asleep where he lay. As she had expected, the Elders had not joined the search - they were too old, or too lazy, even with the deserter in their midst."Tell us, girl," Totin demanded. The screams grew louder, as no doubt more of the Yiga began to fall."There has been–” she feigned an inability to speak.“Tell us child!” Grihan gasped.“At once!” Added Barne.“An ambush! The deserter… It was a trap. He had his men stationed atop the rock walls of the valley. Inglis and I - we managed to survive, but the deserter and his people...they are gone," she clutched her chest, and peered up at the elders through wide and terrified eyes.The Elders were like statues: Totin sitting at the table with his hands clasped together as if in prayer; Grihan with his head in his hands; and Barne leaning back with his burly arms crossed. For nearly a minute they did not move, and the room was silent except for Chaplain Tieo's ragged snores and the intermittent final cries of fallen Yiga. Grihan slammed a fist onto the table in impotent rage, and roared loud enough to startle the poor Chaplain awake.“How could we let that traitor escape!" he snapped, his voice heavy with rage. But none of the Elders moved to act, Milagre noticed. She would have to draw them out.She wiped away her tears. "Inglis is hurt, Elder. If I may return to him-""We will go with you. All of us," Grihan cut in, authoritatively. "We will see what he has done."Barne helped Chaplain Tieo stand, and the Elders of the Yiga left as a group to the hideout entrance. Milagre lagged behind, and once they had passed the threshold, she reached for a spear that she had hidden by the archway.In the small cove beyond, Inglis and the deserter stood side by side, an army of bandits at their back. Hylian, Rito, Zora, Gerudo too. Some wore blue neckerchiefs embroidered in white and red, and others were the stewards and acolytes of the Yiga, still dressed in their now-bloodied white training gear. Milagre stood behind the Elders, and soundlessly levelled her spear at their backs.Barne was the first to turn; when he saw her spear, he dodged sideways, attempting to disarm her with a clock to the shoulder. Milagre dropped to a crouch and skidded forward, evading his wild right hook. She spun on her heel and drove the point of the spear into his neck; his hands grasped the shaft, desperately and ineffectively trying to free himself before falling slack. The remaining Elders regarded her with horror, and turned slowly back towards the bandits."By the gods below! Cinelgen, what have you done!?" Grihan said gravely, the deserters strange name sounding almost sticky on his tongue.The deserter drew an arrow from his quiver, and nocked it to his painted Duplex Bow. "I gave the Yiga a choice. Join me in Hyrule Castle, or die in this empty valley, serving their incompetent elders in their failed quest to defeat the Hero.""Hyrule Castle!?" Totin spat. "You are a fool if you think you can conquer it. It is a ruin, full of Malice and corrup-"Twin arrows to the chest silenced him. Another two quickly followed, finding their mark in Chaplain Tieo. Both men stumbled backwards, and fell hard against the dirt. The Chaplain made no sound, but Elder Totin lay gasping, crying out for mercy. Grihan dropped to Totin’s side, but could do nothing. Above them, Cinelgen gazed on impassively, plucking another two arrows from the quiver on his belt.Grihan raised an accusatory finger, trembling with disbelief and wrath. "Choice? You gave them no choice. You are a murderer. Worse than that. Worse than any of us."Milagre watched as Cinelgen silently nocked two arrows to his bow, and loosed them nonchalantly towards Elder Grihan. There was a wet squelch as they pierced the Elder's chest, followed by a faint thud. Milagre lowered her spear. Totin was calling her name, begging her to help him. The Secretary ignored him, her grey eyes focusing on Inglis, and then Cinelgen. Both men smiled at her when their eyes met.With the last of his strength, Grihan raised his head towards the deserter. "The acolytes...the stewards...they'll never accept you as their Master," he rasped.Cinelgen shook his head, victory setting his eyes alight. He crouched down next to where Grihan lay, casting a long shadow behind himself in the moonlight. "Not their Master, Grihan. Their Chief." * * *Shivering from the chilly morning air, Zelda knelt on the southern bank of the Zora River, at a narrow pass under the shadow of Oren Bridge. She ran her hands through the water to cleanse them of mud, her fingers clammy and pruny. After over a month in Zora's Domain, mud and silt were no strangers; they were nearly as constant as the rushing of the river. And while Zelda knew that this place was not truly her home, there was a comfort in being out in the wild and at work, with the sun at her back and the earth between her fingers.She had spent the past few minutes haphazardly hammering a metal spike into the muddy bank; it had been woven through the corner of a large fishing net, and though she was not particularly strong she had managed to secure it. In the water beyond, Link was swimming across the river with the other corner of the net in hand. His task would have been easier going had they settled on the Bank of Wishes as their site, but when Zelda had suggested it, Link had sternly and suddenly refused. It wasn't worth pushing him, not today. Zelda leaned back to relax and gazed into the water, trying to imagine how the banks might have been shaped by the river over the past hundred years. Had they changed at all? Had anything? What little she had seen of Hyrule since she'd returned seemed characterised by an unchanging peace. A gust of morning air whipped through the ravine, and Zelda drew her arms around herself."I said, all done."Suddenly, Link was standing over her. He was still dripping wet from his swim through the river, and was squeezing water from his long, wheat-blond hair. Behind him, Zelda could see that he had managed to secure his end of the net to the opposing bank. It now spanned the river width - ready to harvest the octorok parts that would soon be floating past."Oh! Sorry," Zelda said, dazed by his abrupt appearance.Link stopped wringing out his hair for a moment, and gave her a concerned look. "You alright?"Zelda dismissed him with a wave of her hand and forced herself to stand. "I must have been daydreaming."They walked together back towards Zora's Domain, where Link retrieved his crossbow and the two dozen additional crossbow bolts that Dento had crafted. Descending to the underbelly of Zora's Domain, the pair was met by the eager greetings of a crimson red Zora. He waved them over, bright fins gleaming in the shafts of morning sun that filtered through the immense, structured columns of the Domain."Sidon!" Zelda called out as they jogged over to the narrow outcropping of rock where he stood. "It's good to see you up!""It's good to be up!" the Prince pumped his fists, and Zelda felt for the first time that her excitement could match his own. Perhaps it was his age, or maybe it was in his Zora blood, but she'd never met an indomitable spirit such as his. After all, not long ago he'd been an inch from death.Following their breakthrough in Vah Ruta, Link and Zelda risked complete dematerialisation to teleport together back to Ne'ez Yohma Shrine, fearful that Sidon did not have the hours it would take them to hike back to the Domain. Their bodies still intact, they ran once more to the infirmary, and combined their power to destroy the Malice that clung to Sidon. Once the toxic substance dissipated, the Prince's yellow eyes had blinked open, and he had managed to flash them one of his trademark toothy grins before easing into a peaceful sleep. The relief between them was so thick they had to lean against each other for support, lest they both simply collapse onto the floor. They sat by Sidon's bed the entire night, with Link falling asleep on Zelda's shoulder as exhaustion took him.Not wanting to push their luck with the King Dorephan, Link and Zelda decided that they should depart as soon as they could. But first, Link wanted to finish the job he'd started…"Today is finally the day!" Sidon beamed as Link began to prep the crossbow. "I can't begin to tell you how excited I am.""You don't need to," Link smiled up at their friend.All had initially agreed that Zelda and Sidon were to aid Link by alerting him to the presence of octorocs out of his field of vision. Settling on solid ground nearby, both Zelda and Sidon watched with quiet admiration as Link set about his task. His Hylian shield on his back, and his crossbow gripped tightly in his left hand, the knight resumed his dance with the octoroks. Lit by the glow emanating from the luminous architecture of Zora's Domain, a duo of the pests leapt out of the water, their beady yellow eyes furious and bright. Link quickly sighted and dispatched the first before it could even fire, before drawing his shield off his back to parry the boulder that the second octorok launched his way. The rock ricocheted off Link's shield, hurtling back towards the aquatic pest, and blasted the creature backwards into the river. Zelda and Sidon all but squealed. Link wasted no time; in a single fluid motion, he shouldered his shield, loaded another bolt, spun on his heel to fire at another octorok that had surfaced to his left. Then he turned, and braced for another onslaught from a trio of the creatures that had emerged behind him. Not a single time did he miss, and not a single time did his footing fail him. It was unnecessary for Zelda and Sidon to intervene, and instead they passed the hour cheering him on. The remains of the infestation of octoroks that had overtaken the underbelly were swiftly floating downstream towards the net Link and Zelda had set up earlier.This is what he is, Zelda thought with a strange sense of dismay. The thought clouded her mind as they fetched the octoballoons from their collection net and handed them over to Marot to sell in her mart within Zora’s Domain. This is what he was born to be.Once the job was done, Link and Zelda were finally ready to depart. By now autumn had come for Hyrule, and the plains and valleys that surrounded the Domain had begun to shift in hue, with swatches of oranges, reds, and warm browns beginning to spread throughout the landscape. The mornings were becoming chilly, the days ever so slightly shorter, and the rainstorms heavier. The Zora had no warm clothes to lend her, so Zelda made it a mental priority to acquire a warm winter cloak as soon as possible. Finding her old travel clothes had been hard enough - somehow a set had been preserved in the stores of Hyrule Castle - but there was little to take from that ruined place, and little else she desired.They bundled up what little they had: food for their journey, flint for their fires, and another two dozen crossbow bolts. As a reward for his service, Dento had specially looked over Link's crossbow, and made some final adjustments as he saw fit. On presenting it to them he declared that it was the first, and the finest, Hylian-made crossbow since the Calamity.Sidon hailed them as they were crossing the Great Zora Bridge, his strong voice filling the air."Hey! Not just yet, you two," he called out to them. The Zora prince opened his arms wide when he reached them, and declared, "I have one last gift to give. It may not be mine to give, but it is the least you deserve."The Prince then went to one knee and bowed low, his face becoming solemn. Both Zelda and Link stepped backward instinctively, unaccustomed to any form of reverence from the Zora prince."I want you to know - no matter what my father thinks, or what the elders think - you have a friend in the Zora, and you have an ally in your new reign," the Prince looked up at them expectantly."R-rise," Zelda said meekly. The words felt as though they were stuck in her throat. "I am not your Queen."Sidon did as he was bid, though his face was still grave. "I hope a time comes when you are," he declared, raising a determined fist. Then he threw his arms wide again, his face perking up with a shining smile. "You two - you are my best friends. If there is nothing else I can give you but my eternal gratitude, then I hope you can accept!"Zelda sighed - somehow none of this felt right. The bowing, the talk of being Queen. "Of course we can," she finally said, doing her best to smile.They said their final, slightly tearful goodbyes and the pair were off, leaving the glittering halls of the Zora far behind. Yet as they walked away from the Domain, Zelda felt suddenly and wholly afraid. The world around her was a rush of colour, and the sounds were murky and wet as though she were underwater.She pulled out her Sheikah Slate to map out their journey, and pressed forward.Their travels brought them down by the Zora River, around the Lanayru Wetlands to the border of Central Hyrule where the ever-present Hyrule Castle lumbered in the distance. It seemed to shift under its own weight, its image gently swaying in the breeze as though it were a living monolith - the fifth Divine Beast of Hyrule. Link caught Zelda staring out over the plains towards it often, usually when the sun was setting and the castle's lingering decay was cloaked by the low light. He wondered about the Malice that covered Castle Town, or the enormous pools that filled Hyrule Castle. Healing the Divine Beast Vah Ruta had nearly rendered the Princess unconscious - would she have enough strength to perform the feat again, or on a larger scale? Would he? Would the sword? Perhaps we can ask it, he thought wryly.Link had never heard the sword's voice - but a part of him knew he had felt it. An ancient song lived in that sword and gave rhythm to the dance he performed when he fought. If it had a soul, it was no longer distinguishable from his. In the week since he and Zelda had left Zora's Domain, Link seldom unstrapped the Master Sword from his back.They were camped in Crenel Peak, not far from Hyrule Castle, on a small outcrop backed by rolling rocky hills that overlooked Hylia River. Link had hunted a few herons, and had spent the past half hour plucking and preparing them for their supper. When he last checked, Zelda had been sitting by their fire, but when he looked up from his work she was gone. His pulse quickened, the herons forgotten as he scrambled to retrieve his sword where it rested propped against a nearby rock. He darted up over the outcropping and frantically scanned the rolling hills. Every sign of movement or flash of blue gave him a start, and he had to steel himself against the rising tide of panic.Link found the princess at the river bank, standing knee deep in the rushing water and watching the fish go by. He had half a mind run down and yank her out of the current, but there was an unsettling stillness to her that gave him pause - as though she wasn't observing the water at all.Quietly so as not to startle her, Link walked to the bank, and sat down by the river, his sword resting against his lap. "You okay?" he asked.Zelda glanced towards him. "I'm just watching the water." Listlessly, the Princess returned to her meditative state as though she were still alone.It had been like this for almost a week now. She seemed so upbeat on the day they'd left the Domain, but by evenfall something changed. She began to talk less and less, her normal chatter receding to no more than the occasional comment on which road to follow, where to camp and so on. She walked slowly, every footfall measured. Occasionally she would stop to gaze at a cluster of flowers or a frog hopping across their path, but not once did she reach for the Sheikah Slate to record anything they saw. Once or twice he had to nudge her along, managing to pull her briefly out of whatever haze she was in. She would smile, apologise for her absent-mindedness, and they would move on.But by now she was nearly silent, eyes opaque and impenetrable. Link had tried to talk to her, but his comments and questions were so clumsy that even just commenting on the weather felt strained. And no matter what he said, she nodded, and murmured a polite reply, and returned to her musings. How could he even begin to broach the subject of her mood? This was the first time she'd walked off alone, however; the first time he'd seen her doing something as dangerous as walking into the swift currents of Hylia River."I'm making supper," Link said, his voice warbling and awkward.The Princess did not turn. She said nothing. The river swept on before them, and in the unseen distance a frog croaked in the grass."Zelda," Link said firmly.The Princess seemed to startle, her entire body tensing. Finally, she sheepishly turned, and quietly stepped out of the water and back onto the bank."Thank you," she murmured as she walked past him, eyes downcast.Once she'd disappeared over the crag, Link stood helplessly by the bank. Was she hurting? Was she mourning? Why didn't she say anything?Casting one last glance at the shallows where Zelda had stood, Link turned and trekked back uphill. Returning to their camp, realization dawned upon him. This must be how I make her feel.He was surprised at how much it bothered him.The next day, they continued south along the river, heading towards Necluda. Link assumed Zelda planned to make for Kakariko Village. It was a wonder they hadn't stopped there sooner. In a few miles they would come upon the Wetland Stables where they had boarded their horses. After that, the road would split, and they could ride up the shallow hills that lead to the north entrance of the old village. Despite their relative anonymity, it was probably better to travel through roads hidden by tall grasses and the passage of time.After retrieving their horses at the stable, Link and Zelda came upon the fork in the trail. The path was split in two by a large and leafy oak. To their right was the winding Hylia River, and to the left the low-lying Lanayru Wetlands and rising rocky hills leading towards Necluda. Zelda paused to check her Sheikah Slate, and then guided her mount past the fork, taking the path that would lead them further into Central Hyrule."Is this the right way?" Link questioned as he caught up to her, urging his horse into a light trot to keep up. Perhaps she had been distracted again.The Princess' eyes were glued to her slate, reins loosely gathered in her hands. "Of course," she said nonchalantly.They were fast heading up the wrong road. "Kakariko is to the east,"Zelda was unphased. "I know."Link bit his lip. "We're heading south.""I know that.""Shouldn’t we go to Kakariko?"The Princess lowered her Slate and held it close to her chest, her knuckles white. "No," she said firmly.Link didn't understand. "But - Impa, and -""In time," Zelda cut him off. Link felt his blood stir, the heat rising from the sword at his back."She’s waiting for you.""I know," the Princess frowned. Link was incredulous. He gazed at her stoic expression, trying to find some scrap of emotion in her that would help him understand - but her eyes were as still as ever. Glossy dark emeralds as smooth and as unyielding as stone.Comprehension finally took hold, and he slowed his horse with a gentle tug on the reins."You don't want to go there," he said, stunned.Zelda tugged hard on her horses reigns, and it halted with an uncomfortable whinny. "Are you done interrogating me or can we just keep moving?"She stole the breath from him with her withering looks, sometimes. He had to focus to find his words.“Please tell me what’s going on. I can’t keep… I don’t understand.”Zelda regarded him blankly. "I'm fine, Link.”"Are you?"Her expression wavered, twitched, the marble form of her face struggling to hide whatever torrent was underneath.“Don’t start,” she said cooly.“Then don’t lie—!”Zelda started as though slapped, and glared at him with a darkening expression. Link braced for anything from tears to shouts, but what she did was so much worse; she just stared at him in silent rage, hands shaking as she held her reigns with an iron grip.What was there to say? How could he salvage this? It felt wrong to challenge her like this. Maybe in a past life, when he was whole, Link might have been able to just do his duty without question, and follow her to the end of the world if need be. But he didn’t know this world anymore, and her voice and her strength had been an anchor. Without it, he wondered why they did anything at all.He became faintly aware of that his horse was shifting nervously, as was Zelda’s, and looking up he saw that Zelda’s gaze was fixed on something behind him.There was a rustle in the grasses and a crunching on the rocks, and Link turned in his saddle to see a small Hylian woman with cropped red hair, dressed in traveller's garb and carrying a large pack. She stood on a large rocky outcrop behind them, at her belt she carried a tightly curved sickle. The sight of it sent a chill through him; his hands on the reins twitched instinctively, wanting to reach for his sword."Pardon me," the woman said sweetly. "But I couldn't help but overhear that you are planning on going to Kakariko Village.""We're not—" Link cut in."Well, I was wondering if you could show me the way." Her brown eyes were round and guileless, set in the pale and smooth face no older than twenty."Who are you?" Link demanded, his whole body tense. At his back was the reassuring warmth of the Master Sword. And in the depths of his soul he could hear it, and feel its rhythm, quiet at first but beginning to drum through his veins.The woman cocked her head to the side. "Oh, I'm just a traveler."Link's raised his hand to his sword hilt, thumbing the familiar grooves. He looked towards Zelda. "Stay back," he cautioned. The Princess did not move."What's the matter, Hero?" the Hylian teased. "Afraid of strangers?""I know what you are.”Casually, almost in invitation, he woman drew her sickle, and spun it menacingly, falling into a fighting stance.“Yiga,” Zelda gasped softlyThe woman burst out laughing. "Yiga!? What Yiga?" she said, slowly sweeping her sickle in an arc in front of her. "I see none here.""I do," Link said.“There are no Yiga left, Hero. There's a new regime come for Hyrule."Link dismounted, drew his sword and brought his shield to bear, quickly climbing the outcrop and standing ready to fight. The Yiga woman stood her ground. "Come then," she taunted. "I've heard stories of your prowess. The Chief thinks you're a prodigy, but I'd see it for myself."
The Chief?
There was no time to contemplate the woman's words; she leapt forward, and the song began. He'd taken down dozens of Yiga; they were quick, and often bled him, but no matter how many he fought they seemed convinced one more attack would do it. But this woman - still in her disguise as a normal Hylian - was quicker and stronger than any other he'd faced. Back and forth on the rolling hill they moved, blade meeting blade, each switching between defense and offense as they tried to learn each other's rhythm and each other's song. The Yiga woman scrambled back on the outcrop, attempt to claim the higher ground, but Link swiftly followed. He aimed a swipe at the woman's side; she parried with the curve of her blade and twisted the sickle before he could react, sending his sword flying from his hand. It landed at the edge of the rocky outcrop, clanging against the stone. A broad follow-up slice from the sickle quickly followed. Link parried with his shield, leaping backwards, and backwards again, narrowly avoiding the woman's repeated strikes that made the air whistle around her weapon. He tried to focus, but the attacks were coming too quickly. Fury, he thought desperately. Fury and thunder! But there was no time; the Yiga woman had him on the defence.Then, in the blurs of colour before him there was a blast of sudden, golden light that knocked the Hylian woman prone.When the light had gone, it was Zelda that remained, standing breathless on the other side of the outcrop. Link tried to call out to her but could make no sound. The shock at seeing her nearly made him lose his footing. Zelda closed in on the attacker, and unleashed another burst of magical energy towards her. The woman managed to duck forward to avoid the beaming light, and retaliated with a swift pommel strike across Zelda's face. The Princess was knocked off her feet, and tripped over the edge of the outcrop. With a wail she disappeared from sight. A fire lit in Link's gut. He lurched forward, shield up; and before the Hylian woman could turn he rammed his shield into her side, sending her tumbling across the rocks. Then without another thought for their attacker, Link leapt from the outcrop, soaring down towards the fork and landing hard against the dirt. Zelda had hit the ground and rolled, tumbling back towards the tree that split the path below. Link fell at her side, the Yiga woman all but forgotten.She was awake, praise Hylia, but dazed. On her forehead was a splintering cut that was no larger than Link's thumb. It was less serious than it could have been. When she saw him she sprang up from the ground, and looked back towards the outcrop, where the Yiga woman was still standing, her sickle in hand. Before Link could react, the Princess raised her hand and sent another surge of energy lancing towards the Yiga. This one must have been stronger - much stronger - for the woman was slammed back against the rocks, and fell limp to the ground."That should do it," Zelda growled, and then she winced from pain. It took a moment for Link to process what he had seen. Up on the outcrop, their attacker did not stir, and would not ever again. The realisation was enough to make his mouth bone-dry.The cut didn't take long to heal, though it left a faint scar. Zelda sat silent the entire time, though when he was done she muttered a quiet thank you.Assured they were now safe, Link ascended the outcrop once more to check that the woman was indeed dead, and to collect his sword along the way. They patted the Yiga woman down, finding nothing of interest among her belongings. No notes, maps, or anything to indicate she had come from Karusa Valley. The sole possession marking her as Yiga was her silver sickle, the hilt wrapped with tight red leather. Around her neck was a small scarf of white and blue. Link determined that the best thing to do was to leave the body, and keep moving. They retrieved their spooked horses, and walked back down to the fork."I'm sorry," Link said as he helped Zelda back up into her saddle."No…don't apologise." Zelda absently rubbed her brow where she had been struck. "That woman. She wasn't a normal one of their kind."Link wrapped a hand around his right wrist, belatedly feeling the first blossoms of pain from a strain. Stiff and sore from the fight, he swung into his own saddle."Did you notice, around her neck?" Zelda asked. "A blue neckerchief. There was something embroidered on it."Link hadn't, if he was to be honest. The woman appeared entirely normal. Perhaps too normal, now that he thought about it."And red hair," Zelda mused. "Quite rare for Hylians."The lingering effects from the fight, and or perhaps more from the way it had ended, gave way to the disbelief at hearing the Princess speak. It was more than she had said in days.And once she began, it seemed, her old habit of never stopping took over. "I wonder what she meant about the Yiga. Could it be their numbers are dwindling? We need to keep an eye out. Note any others we see in similar garb–" Their eyes met and her voice faded. “What is it?”"We’re going go to Kakariko," Link said. "I… won’t take you anywhere else."Zelda glared. "You don't need to take me anywhere.""Then I won’t go anywhere else."Then go alone, he expected her to say, but Zelda just sighed. "You're right. We need to get somewhere safe."They urged their horses forward, and eased back towards the path that led up to Kakariko, riding side by side. Perhaps this was a good time to ask the questions Link had had on his tongue for the past week: how was she really, what was wrong, what should he do? Those and more, along with the questions he had been mulling over since he'd saved her, and since he'd awoken. They rose to the surface one after the other like bugs dancing around a lamp, all fighting to reach the light. Who was I? What did I do? What did I say? Exhaustion muddied his thoughts and he leaned into his saddle."I haven't been well," Zelda said quietly after a time. Her voice was so soft, she could have been speaking to the wind.Link said nothing and instead he carefully undid his woollen hood and handed it across to her. It wasn't much, but it would ward off the cool air.Zelda gave him a long, guilty look. "We can talk," she said as she wrapped the hood around her. "The way we should have been. Once we get to Kakariko, Link. I promise."Around them the hills of Necluda rose as towards the safe embrace of Kakariko they rode.It was raining by the time they reached Kakariko Village early the next day; Link had let Zelda keep his hood, and she kept it wrapped close around her face. Above them the sky was a morose grey, though the horizon was tinted with the first hints of dawn. Link kept his sword unsheathed for the remainder of their journey to the village, only relaxing when the wooden archways and traditional charms finally came into view. It had been a long, arduous night, and Zelda was unable to keep herself from yawning.The village was still asleep, the only signs of activity being the low clucking of cuccoos and the ethereal hovering of sunset fireflies. Zelda was struck by the sight of the sloped roof homes clustered around a tall waterfall, and the smell of earth and rain that signified the first days of harvest. To see that the village had not changed greatly in one hundred years warmed her more than Link's hood, more than any coat or fire could. Flashes of a childhood lost to time came back to her: trips with her mother as a young child across Hyrule Field and into the mountains of Necluda, the Sheikah girl a few years older than herself who would become her closest friend, and their afternoons spent at the goddess pool. The evening banquets under the stars, and the rich aromatic scent of warm tea and pumpkin stew. Any more and she felt she would faint; even the Gerudo could not distil a wine stronger than this. They stopped outside the large compound at western edge of the village. When they dismounted, Zelda reached out for Link and gripped his arm, overcome"I'm not ready," she whispered."Perhaps we should rest first,” came Link's reassuring voice. “There’s an inn.”Zelda waited outside with the horses while he went inside and paid for two soft beds. She kept her golden hair hidden under Link’s hood while she looked around. The village really was unchanged: the same guardian deities sat outside the main compound, the same goddess statue she had played around as a child, the same rows of plum trees and tilled earth.Once inside, only then did Zelda dare take off the now rain soaked hood. She was sitting down on one of the beds, unlacing her boots, when Link announced he would be back in a few minutes."I'm going to let Impa and Paya know we're here," he said."P-paya?" Zelda asked, but the name died on her lips, and Link ways already halfway out the door. She was determined to wait for his return and demand an answer, but the warmth of the inn and the softness of the bed was already drawing her to sleep.It was evenfall by the time Zelda awoke. The rain still drizzled, saturating the air and muddying the ground as she and Link walked to Impa's home. When Zelda knocked and pushed open the doors she was met with another wave of nostalgia. She remembered it so clearly: just a few hours after the Calamity, standing before Impa with grave eyes and the Sheikah Slate in hand; their last conversation as they frantically planned their next moves and said their goodbyes; and Zelda's desperate pleas for her oldest friend to help her appointed knight when the time came.There was a white-haired woman kneeling on the floor, slowly polishing the dark wooden floorboards."Impa?" Zelda called to her hesitantly. The Sheikah woman turned to face them, her long tresses fluttering as she moved to reveal...a face completely unfamiliar. The woman's big doe eyes went wide when she saw Link and Zelda. She had full rosy cheeks - now bright red - and a slender Sheikah symbol tattooed on her forehead. She dropped her polishing cloth and brought her hands to her face in shock. She seemed incapable of speech, her lip quivering at the sight of them. Link stepped forward."Paya," he said. "This is Zelda.""Oh!" the woman peeped. She took a moment to compose herself and dropped her hands. She then rose to her feet, and bowed deeply. "I'm-I'm so sorry, Princess. I forgot all of my manners. You are here to see Lady Impa? My grandmother is upstairs."G-grandmother? Zelda could not speak. She had seen the old woman when she watched over Link, in the days after he awoke. But there was the seeing she had done from the Hyrule Castle, and the being that she was doing now."T-thank y-" she started, but the words, whatever words they were, were caught in her throat.Link was at her side again. "We can wait in here, Paya, it's fine."The Sheikah girl nodded, bowed again, and crept up the stairs to the second story of the house. When she was gone, Zelda all but fell to her knees, and knelt before the dais at the centre of the room. Link was beside her, as present as ever."You did well," he said."No, I didn't," Zelda laughed weakly, feeling herself go red.The ceiling creaked above them, and after a few minutes Paya descended the stairs, leading a small, elderly woman into the room. If seeing the village again made her heart quicken, seeing Impa was a full bodied blow of grief. She gaped silently as Paya led Impa to the dais, and settled her into the tower of pillows that was her throne. Beside her Link moved to stand, but the old woman raised a hand."No, do not rise for me, it is I who should bow to you." The old woman gazed slowly over to Zelda; if not for the signature Sheikah tattoo at the centre of her forehead, she would have been unrecognisable. For the second, or perhaps the third time that morning, words failed Zelda entirely. She let out a weak sob, unable to stop the fresh tears from welling in her eyes."Hello again, Princess," Impa breathed sadly. "You live. The goddess has been kind."How pathetic she must look. How weak, and small. She couldn't stop the tears now. "Yes," was all she could manage, though Impa seemed unphased."Link, Paya, leave us," she commanded gently. "There are those blessed without memory of the Calamity. The Princess and I are not among them."Wordlessly, Link and the Sheikah girl did as they were told, slipping out the door into the village outside."Look at me," Impa said, her voice as compassionate as it was stern. Zelda lifted her head, as difficult as it was to do so, and looked her old friend in the eyes. She knew her face was marred with grief, her tears hot against her skin."Time is cruel," Impa crossed her hands in her lap. "Have no shame in your grief."Zelda shook her head. "No - I'm just a fool. But a part of me hoped, for some stupid reason-""-that I would be the same as you remember - ha!" the old woman slapped her knee. "Me too, me too!"Zelda laughed, hiccupping and wiping away the last of her tears. "You were so tall. I was jealous.""Oh I know, I know. But now look at me - blessed with a long life, and a pretty granddaughter, and an even prettier best friend, alive and whole before me. If I had riches, I would give it all to that knight of yours."Zelda smiled hesitantly. When she looked at the old woman she saw that a shade of her once-young friend was still there - the same sagely and savvy woman, once wise beyond her years and now wise precisely because of them. Time was cruel indeed; but in this case it had also been kind."I'm glad to see you, Impa," Zelda said warmly.The old woman nodded. "As am I, Zelda."They talked of Link and Zelda's journeys since the fall of Ganon, and of the great event itself. Despite the mere months since it had occurred, Zelda already found the memory of her toil in Hyrule Castle beginning to fade. Even those last blazing moments in Hyrule Field, as the beast raged before her, had been reduced to nothing more than colour and noise.When Zelda was done, Impa regarded her solemnly. "You have a great many troubles, don't you, dear Zelda?"Zelda wasn't sure where to begin. Is it that obvious?The old woman waved her hand dismissively. "No need to burden yourself now. Supper will be ready soon. Tell me more of your travels."Relieved, Zelda continued to tell Impa of their escapades; their troubles in Zora's Domain, her discovery in Vah Ruta, the formidable Zora prince. She recited it all as though it were a book, her mind and memory the ink and pages. Her old friend listened quietly, hands folded, occasionally nodding her head in acknowledgement.Outside, the rain began to ease."How are you, Paya?"Link stood with the Sheikah girl under outer lip of the pagoda roof, pressed up against the outer wall of Impa's house to avoid the rain.Paya seemed startled as ever that he would speak to her. "Oh, me? Oh...you know. I'm fine. I do what I can here, and I look after my grandmother. It isn't much, but it's what I am.""It's kind of you," Link assured her. "Your people are lucky.""Oh, t-thank you!" the girl smiled meekly. "I hope we've made you feel as at home as possible here.""You have," he nodded, and patted his stomach. "I'm looking forward to some of that famous Kakariko stew."Paya's face lit up. "You are in luck then, Master Link. Dorian and Cado prepared a pot just yesterday."They watched the rain together in silence, and Link absorbed the few moments of peace they had all been given. Here, shrouded by the tall mountains and misty air, it was as if this was the only place in all of Hyrule. Paya was busy peering through the window into Impa's audience room, though the glass was too foggy to see anything clearly. He considered pressing an ear to the wall and eavesdropping on the women inside, but a part of him had no desire to know of what they spoke."How is she?" Paya asked, breaking the silence. Link shrugged, though it was hard not to be honest with the bright-eyed Sheikah girl."I wish I knew," he replied. "Though I don't know she knows either.""Oh," Paya frowned. "I suppose that makes sense. I can't imagine what she endured. She must be so strong. More so than any of us.""You're probably right there." Link agreed, remembering the way Zelda had carried him through his grief in Zora’s Domain. She'd made it seem easy, natural even."I can't believe I have been lucky enough to see her with my own eyes," Paya gushed, bringing her hands to her cheeks. "All I heard growing up was how brave and strong she was. How wise, and beautiful too. I thought it was all just a legend but…""She is,” Link said aloud. The thought surprised him. Few could honestly deny Zelda’s beauty. What startled him was that the thought was old, almost a memory - a lingering feeling of something from long ago. Surely not.. The rain stopped, the clouds above beginning to fragment.Beside him, Paya was fidgeting nervously with her robe. "You just...you just let me know if there's anything either of you need, Master Link!" she told him."Of course, Paya," Link smiled. "Thank you. This place is a sanctuary for us.""And Link," Paya began, suddenly sheepish. "I just want to thank you for everything you have done. You're our hero, really."Link blushed, and raised a hand awkwardly to scratch the back of his neck. "Oh, uh, it's nothing." Hero. The title had never seemed to suit him, even now.Paya voice was quiet, almost as soft as a whisper. There was no rain to hide her words. "And...and I just want to thank you, personally.""..oh?""I - well I can't put it into words. Just know that I'm grateful to be...to be your friend." The Sheikah girl's words were full with sincerity, and something about them seemed so final. She brought her hands to her face again. "Is...is that okay with you?"Link chuckled. "Sure, of course it is, Paya," and he saw her whole body relax. She nodded assuredly, before attempting to spy through the window again. There was still nothing to see; however, now that the rain had stopped he could hear a hushed conversation coming through the wall. Paya left the balcony, moving down to the deity statues at the base of the house. She began turning over the apples that sat in the offering bowls one by one, examining them for rot.With nothing else do to, Link followed. His stomach rumbled at the sight of the apples. Racking his brain, he realised he couldn't remember the last time he'd even had something as hearty as stew."Any spare apples I can take?" he asked, rubbing his belly again. Paya laughed and shook her head."You know, Master Link, you're much more talkative lately," she observed, checking then replacing the last of the apples."Talkative?" Link was taken aback. No one had ever accused him of that before. "Am...am I?"Above them the wide double doors creaked open. Zelda and Impa emerged onto the balcony; their faces both shadowed and solemn."Papaya," Impa called down from the balcony. "Take the Princess upstairs, and give her a fresh set of clothes. I've been wearing the same robe for decades and even I think she needs something new to wear."The old woman raised a hand, pointed to the neighbouring house. Smoke billowed from its wide chimney. "And you, Champion. To Dorian. We need someone strong to carry that pot of stew."Paya and Link shared a friendly look, and set about their tasks.Once they had all supped and the village again quieted, Impa again sent Link and Paya away; she all but commanded the boy to go to bed, and had her granddaughter go to Claree's to help the tailor with her stock ('Or, whatever else she might need you to do' she had added).Zelda was glad at least, to be alone with her friend again. Impa was one of the few people - or perhaps the only person - who could remember the events of the Calamity, let alone understand.Impa had Zelda find and brew them a pot of tea. After some rearranging of Impa's pillows, they sat opposite each other on the dais. Zelda breathed in the smell of the tea, feeling once again transported through time. She was grateful that the precise Kakariko brew had not changed."Tell me the worst of it, Zelda. While the tea is hot," Impa implored, before taking a long sip. Zelda followed, focusing on the warmth of the tea to steady her nerves.Lowering her cup, she began to unravel her thoughts. "I know my destiny. I see it every time I look at the castle. I feel it every time I use the power. But I don't want any of it.""You feel nothing, then?" pressed the old woman. "Not even for your home?""Nothing. There are times when I feel nothing at all, for anything or anyone. I...I'm so tired, Impa. So tired of caring..." She felt the sorrow welling up within her, pulling her down and down. "If I could tell you why, if there was even a reason..."Impa lowered her cup to the floor, and leaned forward on her pillows. She clapped her hands down onto her lap. "As much as it is my wish is to see you happy after all these years, you and I both know your work is not yet finished. In your absence, and in the absence of Calamity Ganon, all the darkness that remains in Hyrule will fester. If it is not stopped, it could reach the same level of danger as the Calamity. United, the people can rebuild from any tragedy. But torn apart, they become nothing. This is what will befall Hyrule should you not succeed in uniting this kingdom once again, as it was in your father's day."Zelda thought of the strange Yiga woman who attacked them on the road. She thought of the Malice that had infected Sidon. She could feel each omen under her skin."What you say is true, Impa" she sighed."Then you know what you must do."Zelda tried to protest, the words falling heavy from her tongue, hating the pitiful selfishness in her tone. "But what if that isn't what I want anymore?"Gently but firmly, Impa chided her. "Do you think your knight wanted to do all he has done for us? Do you think I wanted to grow old as I waited for my friend to return? Do you think Purah, or Robbie, wanted to leave their people and their home to do the same?"Though Impa sat just across from her, it felt as though there was a gulf between them. Ashamed, and weary from the pain, Zelda gazed at the wooden floor. In her hands, the teacup was beginning to cool.Impa's tone softened, and she extended a wrinkled hand to Zelda, rubbing a thumb across her palm. "Zelda, I am not telling you that you cannot feel this way. One hundred years ago, your father and I tried to force a duty upon you, and I can see now the suffering it caused you. But still, to my sorrow, the duty remains. Not only to that boy, but to yourself - do not tell me you toiled away for one hundred years against that beast just to disappear from the world? You must find a way, and this time your own way, to fulfill your destiny."Zelda blinked away the fresh tears. "I don't know how.""Then tell me, what is it that you do want?"That took some thought. For a few moments she thought the answer could again be 'nothing'. But the desires came to the surface one by one, each stronger than the last. "I want to see my home healed. And I want the Divine Beasts, and all of the Sheikah technology, to be protected from harm and misuse. And Link...I want him to be safe, and happy.""Can these wishes not also bring forth the restoration of your kingdom? Or perhaps, could Hyrule's healing be a prerequisite of what you want? In what other scenario could Link be safe, or the Divine Beasts protected, if it is not you who reclaims the throne?"Zelda pondered Impa's words while the old woman poured them both another cup of tea."Think on it as long as you need, Princess, and take your time to heal," the woman's voice was laced with regret. "There is no soft way to say it. You have had no rest, and these burdens-""-have broken me. Even Link sees it.""Strange time for you to start underestimating him, Zelda," Impa cautioned. "It doesn't matter - stay here with him as long as you need. Kakariko is your home, and the Sheikah your people. We are at the ready to serve. We have been for one hundred years."When Link arose at dawn the next morning, something he realised was becoming at habit, the nodding inn-keep Ollie had a message for him that had come directly from the Elder’s House. It was a short and pointed order.
Champion, come to the goddess statue when you wake. Much to discuss.
Zelda was bundled under the blankets of her own bed, still as desert sands. “Let her know I’ll be back, if she wakes up before then,” he instructed Ollie. The inn-keep was mid-yawn, but gave him a thumbs up and swiftly nodded off once more where he stood.Elder Impa was waiting for him by the goddess statue, her hands clasped in prayer. Instead of her usual ceremonial hat with its swaying chains, she wore a large cloak in a deep navy, its tall hood making it look more like a small tent than a garment. The waters of the pool in which the statue stood were already catching the morning light.The old woman did not waste any time. "Zelda is not well, Link. She is worse than I thought she would be.""I know." Link nodded. But I don't know why."I imagine it was a shock for you," Impa began, sensing his thoughts. "To remember only fragments of your former life. But your ignorance from the full extent of it has shielded you. The Princess has had no such bliss. She remembers all, she feels all. And somewhere between the time you rescued her and the time you brought her here, she has lost the ability to cope."Impa's words were paralysing. Zelda could no longer cope? Hadn't Paya she said was the strongest out of all of them? What would the rest of them do now?“But she was fine, in Zora’s Domain,” was the only feeble counter he could think of.“Of course she was. The Zora were in crisis. She – and you – thrive in such an environment.”There was no such crisis here, Link understood immediately. Only time, only quiet; space for shadows to grow long and for dark thoughts to hide within them.Impa suddenly turned to face him, a tiny hand striking out from her robe to grab his wrist. She held on tight, and said, "Link, you must find a way to protect her from this.""Me? I’m just her knight—“"Are you just?" She let go of Link’s wrist and motioned to the crossbow that hung at his hip - he had not parted with it since they left the Domain. "The Princess told me of that contraption of yours. I wonder if you might be a little wiser than you think. And allow me to correct myself, protection is not the right word here. Support is what she needs. Support to work herself through this. That is all you need do."“But how?”“It will be difficult to know. But even the smallest amount of joy returned to the Princess’ life may take root, and bloom in time. Pain like ours is strong, Champion. It needs strength to temper it.”Link didn’t know what to say, his thoughts heavy and clouded. In the silence, Elder Impa turned back towards the Goddess statue and bowed.“The Goddess left our princesses a terrible destiny,” she sighed. And with that, she turned back towards her house, and with smooth unseen steps she was gone, her long robe trailing long after her.Link looked back to the Goddess statue, staring long at its peaceful face. Unsure of what else to do, and uneasy about leaving Her presence without paying respects, he bowed his head in silent prayer.In reply the ethereal voice whispered words that only he could hear: You who have conquered the shrines and claimed their Spirit Orbs. I can offer you great power…Shrines... He looked up to the hill overlooking the village, and the diffuse blue glow that emanated from Ta’loh Naeg shrine atop the hill. It had been a few months at least since he'd gone down into one of those shrines, and in truth he'd lost count of how many he'd found. It couldn’t be all of them, not yet. There must be more. Zelda would know.The realisation hit like a wave against the rocky surf; the suddenness of it startled him, and Link had to stop himself from exclaiming. Shrines! Of course! He turned and hurried back towards the inn.Ha Dahamar Shrine pulsed with a cool blue light, its swirling patterns reflected dimly in the low pool that surrounded its base. The fields of Necluda were shrouded in a fine mist, and above the sky had darkened with the signs of yet another rainstorm.Link and Zelda shared a saddle, having left Zelda's horse in Kakariko Village, and a few miles back from their destination he had instructed Zelda to close her eyes. As they descended the rocky pass to the ruined plains, his eyes had passed briefly over the decaying Guardians that littered the field. Best not to linger very long, he decided. He brought their horse to a stop at the Shrine entrance and dismounted, biting his lip to stop from yelping as he landed in the icy water. Zelda waited patiently, silent as ever."Alright, open your eyes," Link called up to her, gently pulling the horse's reins to nudge it closer to the Shrine."I've seen this before," Zelda said plainly. "This is one of the first ones we found.""You haven't seen all of it," Link helped her dismount, and lead her over to the pedestal. He watched as the understanding dawned on the Princess' face. Before them the interlacing mechanical doors of the Shrine were closed, so Link motioned towards the Shiekah Slate hooked at Zelda's hip."Go on," he urged her, unable to suppress his grin. Apprehensively, the Princess reached for her slate, and gently tapped it against the pedestal. The mechanical doors whirred open with an otherworldly ease, and soundlessly locked into place. In the chamber beyond, the glowing all-seeing Eye of the Sheikah was carved into the stone base of the Shrine, signifying the true entrance into the halls beyond."It's been completed," Link explained as Zelda carefully walked into the chamber. "But it should all still be down there." I think, he added mentally.He joined her on the platform, and together they descended into the Shrine. Link's guess had been correct. Everything about the Shrine interior - from the towering ceilings to the blue lamps that lined the walls, to the ancient carvings in the stone floors - was just as he had left it.The Princess could not speak. She gazed around the interior, her mouth hung open and her eyes full of awe. Her boots echoed on the stone floor as she stepped further into the shrine.Link watched her anxiously. "Is...is it okay? Maybe an unexplored one would be better but-"And then she threw herself at him, wrapping her arms around him so tightly that he was almost winded. He gingerly placed his hands on her shoulders, unsure how to react to...this. Her angel-blonde hair was in his face, and she smelled of earth, and grass, and rain."'Is it okay?'" she teased after she pulled away. "Is it okay? Link…"Lighter than she had been for days, or maybe weeks, or months, the Princess spun away from him, marvelling at everything she saw. He watched as the young woman explored every inch of the Shrine that she could, snapping photos and taking notes, and beginning to prattle to herself, and to him, about what she saw.Link tried to savour the afternoon they spent in the Shrine; to grasp it and make it one of his few solid and stable memories. But time moved so fast, and seemed like to slip through his fingers. He felt almost as reluctant as Zelda to leave, but he knew above them night was beginning to fall.They were standing in the shallow pool beside the Ha Dahamar shrine, with Link preparing his horse to take them back to Kakariko, when at last Zelda spoke to him as she had promised.“All of this for me, Link,” she said with a quiet laugh. “And for what in return?”Link didn’t know the answer, unsure if he even had one.“I know what Impa told you, to stay by my side,” Zelda went on. “I can’t help but wonder if I deserve it.”“But, Calamity Ganon, and helping Sidon, and Vah Ruta—““That was duty. Did anyone else receive such thanks for doing theirs?”More questions he could not answer. In the silence, their horse whinnied. Zelda approached him then, hands clasped and fidgeting nervously.“You know, it’s funny. When I was a girl, the world seemed too small to contain me, like a cage into which I could never fit. Now Hyrule feels infinite. I know I must begin something, but not what, and not where. Well, I thought that place was Zora’s Domain, but I have learnt now that my instincts can be wrong.”She worried a button at her collar, fingers like a flickering flame. Link wanted to take her hands in his and hold them steady so that she might feel calm, but afraid of doing too much, and of crossing the thin boundary of civility they had built between themselves, he just said, “If there’s anything you need…”“Time. I think I just need time, Link.”“Okay. Time,” he repeated, and immediately began wondering how something like that could be given.During their slow ride back to Kakariko under a starless sky, and indeed for the rest of the evening, Zelda's exuberance waned, and she spoke little. The weight and the sorrow that clouded her - it had not fully lifted. It couldn't have. Link reminded himself of Impa's advice; she needed support, and she needed time. Late in the evening, as he sat tending his crossbow on the balcony of Impa's house, he watched Paya and Zelda talk quietly by a campfire lit below. They were both dressed in the traditional Sheikah garb, Zelda's hair coiled into a high bun just like Paya's. In the low light they could almost be sisters; the way Zelda and Impa were a hundred years past. That was the way it should have been, before Calamity put an end to those days. In the present, Paya said something to embarrass herself, her hands rushing to cover her face, and over the crackling fire Link heard both women laugh.Pain like ours is strong, he mused, Impa's words on his mind. And time so cruel.
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
Part Two: Altercation
Zelda held the Sheikah Slate close to her face and peered through the scope. A few hundred feet below, suspended at the centre of the wide and glistening Lake Akkala, was the outset village of Tarrey Town. Through the scope she could just make out the village residents, half a dozen figures no bigger than pin pricks going about their morning errands.For a day now Link and Zelda had been camped at the edge of the eastern battlements of Akkala Citadel. There they had paused on their journey to get their bearings before heading into Deep Akkala, and had spotted Tarrey Town the moment they finished setting up camp. As eager as Zelda had been to travel down the hillside and step foot in the first new Hyrulean town in a century, it was too far off the beaten path to justify the detour."At least Tarrey Town is still flourishing," Zelda said as she paused to take a photo. "But I wonder why Hudson chose somewhere so remote.""From the ground up, I think they say," Link said, sitting beside her with his legs swung over the stone precipice of the battlements. "They had to start somewhere.""Hmm, yes, but a shame they couldn't start here." Zelda motioned to the Citadel ruins that loomed above them.What the Calamity had not claimed, time had taken. A century of the battering winds, endless rain, and raging thunderstorms in Akkala had weathered away much of the fortress’ stone, giving it a shapeless, spongy texture. Moss covered the remaining relics of the Citadel’s defence canons, rendering them rusted and useless. At the Citadel peak, where a Sheikah Tower had erupted from the stone, swaths of Malice still gurgled.“Well, we’re here,” Link murmured. He leaned back, hands braced against the cool cobble, and closed his eyes to focus on the warmth from the sun. Despite their sad surroundings, he felt oddly at ease.Was it the change or the familiarity? Being on the road again under the stars was better than being under the gloomy skies over Kakariko. Their month-long stay there had been welcome respite and re-invigoration – Link had even found time to train with the Sheikah – but it could not last forever. Their excursion to Ha Dahamar Shrine (and later the Ta’Loh Naeg and Lakna Rokee shrines in the forest overlooking Kakariko Village) had given Zelda something to focus on, as the mystery of the worlds within the shrines were open and ripe for investigation and analysis. Still she spoke and ate little, and often wandered listlessly between the inn and Impa's house.If Link was to be honest with himself, seeing her like this, and being unable to do anything about it, had begun to make him feel sick. A gnarling infestation was making root within him, like a mould or a deadly fungus, and he hated the feel of it; resentment, frustration.It was Elder Impa - sensing the gloom in them both - who had suggested Zelda and Link travel away from Kakariko on a short and specific mission. Sanctuary though it may be, she had told them, perhaps Kakariko carried too many memories to be their place of healing.She suggested the pair utilise their newfound ability to destroy Malice and put it to the test. After some collective brainstorming over their map, Link and Zelda identified Akkala Citadel as the next major site of corruption. As they planned their route through northern Hyrule - starting from Kakariko, travelling north to Akkala Citadel, and then across Akkala Span to Deep Akkala where her friend Robbie still ran his Ancient Tech Lab - Link saw Zelda's spirits lift once again. He had taken it as a sign of good things to come.They were ready to depart less than a day later, and as they had been saddling their horses, Paya had come running over with two parcels wrapped in paper and twine. They were gifts to help keep warm on the road, she had said, and Link and Zelda found within the parcels a pair of traditional Sheikah robes. The robes were warm but breathable and light, and Zelda had taken such an immediate liking to hers that she hurried off to change. When she returned, she had traded her blue royal blouse for a white, wide-collared robe and accompanying navy obi.Their travels from then were easy going. The route north took them around the Lanayru Wetlands for the third time in almost as many months, and the trade routes that snaked from Lanaryu to Akkala were well maintained, on account of the frequent shipments of ore and stone carried down from Eldin by the Gorons.They even had no trouble hiking up the enormous stairs of Akkala Citadel. The first time Link had been by, to activate Akkala Tower, the place had been overrun by Guardian Skywatchers and Bokoblins. But the Guardians had all fallen the day Zelda had sealed Calamity Ganon away, and not long after that many of the foul monsters seemed to die off as well. Link could count on one hand the number he had seen since that day.All this to mean that their survey of Akkala Citadel could be carried out in peace. The inhabitants of Akkala — few that they were — must have understood just how ruined the Citadel was, for Link had seen no tourists or curious travellers on its grounds.“Let’s do a loop of the exterior walkways and battlements, and then we can head to the peak,” Zelda said as they prepared to commence their inspection. “I will take photos and notes and you, Link… well…”She frowned awkwardly.“I’ll keep watch,” Link offered. He fell comfortably into his old habits — the Knight protector at the side of his charge — but admittedly felt the same unease about it as Zelda. He was quietly curious if there could be more to their lives than this arrangement, but nevertheless, was happy to continue as they were. Anything else might be too… complicated.For about an hour, they walked the length the winding stone stairs that circled the outer edges of the Citadel, heading down to its base where the broken Akkala Bridge had been crudely repaired with rope and wooden planks, then doubling back to head up towards the peak.As they neared the final flight of stairs, a long call that soared through the cool afternoon air startled them from their solitude. A hundred feet above them was a Hylian man, standing at the very top of the stairs."Travellers!" he called out, and began to jog towards them. Link positioned himself between the Princess and the Hylian, ready to reach for his sword if the need arose. He quickly evaluated the newcomer: the man wore a frayed Hylian soldier tunic, with the crimson crest faded to a dull orange. He was armed with little more than a traveller's sword and shield, and Link noted with some relief that he carried nothing in the form of a sickle.“Didn't mean to startle you, I just don't see travellers here very often,” the man said once he reached them. “‘Name’s Nell.”He held out a hand, which Link did not take, and after a protracted moment Zelda stepped to offer her own. “So nice to meet you. I’m Zelda, this is Link.”She smiled brightly at Nell, but managed through some magic to pass Link a hidden frown at his standoffishness.“Did you find the new bridge manageable?" Nell inquired.Manageable was the only compliment Link could give the rope bridge, which he and Zelda had struggled for half an hour to cross — both nearly falling twice each.“It was certainly functional,” Zelda affirmed."I camped at that ruined bridge for nearly a year, bolstering my courage to try to cross," Nell went on. "D'you know the story of this place?"
No but Zelda probably-
"I don't," Zelda replied, tone subdued. "What happened here?"With an earnest voice, Nell began his tale. Akkala Citadel was the last stand of Hyrule. When the Calamity struck, Hyrule's army was overcome with a threat they could never have prepared for: the possessed guardians, the corrupted Divine Beasts, and an army of monsters. With the fall of Hyrule Castle and Castle Town, the remaining Hylian Knights retreated to Akkala Citadel."This place was built to protect Akkala. To protect Hyrule. You can see it in the sheer enormity of the structure," Nell explained. "But the Citadel was never built with the Guardians in mind - nothing in Hyrule was. It fell within hours, and so too did the remnants of the Hylian Knights."Retelling the story seemed to sober Nell. Rubbing the frayed tendrils of his soldier's tunic between a thumb and forefinger, his voice sounding like it could break, he concluded his tale. "This tunic belonged to kin of mine. A great uncle. It was not the one he fell in, no, but it was his all the same. I came to pay him my respects - and I suppose I've done that now." He inclined his head with respect towards the fallen citadel, lost to his thoughts once more.Beside him, Link saw that Zelda had wrapped her arms around herself, and that tears were forming in her eyes."You all right there, miss?" Nell asked, his words seeming to startle her."Oh - I just - it was your story," she hurriedly dabbed away the tears. "It was very moving.""Well, you can find me down in Tarrey Town later if you want to trade tales." Nell seemed to sense her sorrow, and stepped politely out of their way. "I better be off, or I won't reach it before nightfall. Thanks for listening."Zelda nodded, and they watched wordlessly as Nell walked upright and unimpeded down the stairwell. She was crying by the time he was out of sight, and there was nothing more for Link to do than to offer his arm, and escort her up the winding stone stairs to the Citadel peak. He guessed the cause easy enough: another place lost to ruin, another few hundred Hylians sacrificed, and from her perspective, all of it entirely her fault.As they neared the peak, the tragedy of the place began to sink in for Link as well. This was where they died, the last of his brothers from the Hylian Academy. Their names were lost now, but echoes of their faces began to haunt him. Youths just like him, with long ears and wide, naive eyes. Golden Boy, they'd called him. They'd ruffle his long hair, and tease him for his short stature. You'll catch up, Small Fry, one day. But when he was chosen by the Sword, they had all bowed. And when the Calamity struck, they had all fallen. I'm the last one, he reflected as they approached the peak. I'm the last knight of Hyrule.Link and Zelda stood at the edge of the Citadel Peak, surrounded by the gruesome pools of Malice that almost completely covered the top of the ruins. They had moved their camp to the only enclosed space on the peak, and their next step was to rid the area of the corruption that still clung to it. They did not have much longer; dusk was approaching, as well as another Akkala rainstorm. They needed time to bunker down and light a fire before the night chill set in. Zelda was re-tying her obi, adjusting the robe so that it was wrapped tighter around her torso."You ready?" Link asked her, noticing her fussing."Are you?" She countered.Link instinctively raised his right hand to the hilt of his sword. What do you think, he asked it. Are we ready?No reply came, and Zelda was looking at him expectantly. Link glanced at the dark clouds above, and drew the Sword. "Let's find out.”As with the two times previously that they had performed the ritual, Link held the Sword with the blade pointing downwards. He offered the hilt to Zelda, and she wrapped her hands around it, her fingers partially interlaced with his.Kass' song returned to Link as he waited for the Princess to begin the ritual. The Hero, and the Princess, hand in hand….Link had not stopped to contemplate the rest of the lyrics; the ones that told of the Princess's apparent love for her Knight, and how this love had awoken her powers. The truth of these words seemed just like everything else Link and Zelda had once possessed; lost to time and relegated to legend. Before him, the Princess - the real Princess - had closed her eyes and was focusing on the sword. Link followed suit, trying to focus his wayward mind.He drew his attention to the ridges on the hilt of his sword, and recalled for an instant just before it had chosen him. He was a newly-minted knight, his first Hinox kill under his belt. The other Knights cheered when he rode back to the barracks, the Hinox guts and other foul finds tied to a bag on his saddle. Small Fry's come back, they teased. The Golden Boy's done it. And then, his memory shifting like sands, he recalled standing in the throne room and bowing before the King. You are the youngest to achieve your title, came the booming voice. And for your dedication you will travel north, where the real test of your courage will begin….Link could feel the blazing heat from their combined powers, though it did not burn him. Unable to resist, he opened his eyes to look upon the radiant light that surrounded them, and the enormous sphere of power that would soon envelop all of Akkala Citadel. In front of him, Zelda's face was strained as she concentrated, and tears were falling from her eyes. Her hands were gripping the hilt so tightly that her knuckles were white and her nails were beginning to dig into his skin. He tried to call out to her, but he could not move, let alone speak.Just focus on the Sword, he thought, and closed his eyes again. The blaze around them intensified until it was raging and the heat almost too much to bear. However, this time the power felt...off. Unstable, and frantic; he could sense it. Focus, he told himself. Focus!The Sword, the voice, the song; Link tried to collect his thoughts but the volatility that surrounded them kept distracting him. He breathed deeply, reining in his focus to just the movement of the hot air through his lungs.At last, the sphere of light shattered and their work was complete. Link quickly sheathed his sword, and moved forward to catch a staggering Zelda before she fell, remembering the first time she had fainted. Only now when he caught her, she gasped sharply, and seemed to collapse under her own weight. They fell backwards onto the cobbles and the Princess clung to him, wriggling fingers clawing at his tunic as she heaved through panting breaths. He tried to lift her to her feet, but she would not - or perhaps could not move. Fighting under her weight, Link struggled to his knees; Zelda was still collapsed against him, but he had managed to get her to sit upright at least."Help me," she wheezed. "I can't - I can't breathe."Dumbfounded and overwhelmed, Link didn’t know what to do. He held her as she struggled through more waves of ragged breaths. Her face was red, and her cheeks were streaked with tears. He could feel the racing of her heart againstHer voice was waning, though the gasps did not stop. "Link, I can't breathe, I can't...""I know, I know," Link said helplessly. Each ragged breath sent a sharp pang of panic through him.He could not speak. The fear had paralysed him. Desperate, he mouthed a silent prayer, beseeching whoever or whatever could hear him. Help us, please, he begged.Slicing through the panic and desperation, a voice spoke. Almost too quiet to hear, but with a stunning clarity.
Take her from this place.
Link did not stop to wonder from where the voice came. Summoning his strength, he lifted Zelda off the ground, and carried her back to their camp. He propped her up on her bedroll, against a mossy brick wall. Still the heaving gasps continued. He knelt down in front of her."What's happening?" he asked aloud. Zelda's head remained bowed, too lost in her struggle to reply.
The ritual has taken a great toll, Master.
"Master…?" he breathed. "I don't—"
Find her water.
Link did as he was bid, scrambling over to find his water skin. He returned to Zelda's side, pushing down his own panic, and placed a steadying hand on her shoulder."Just focus on me," he reassured gently. "I've got water."Wordlessly, Zelda nodded, hiccuping through another round of spluttering coughs. She gripped his arm, and slowly her breaths lengthened and the heaves ceased. She coughed, and wiped the tears from her eyes.Taking in a deep steadying breath, she finally spoke, the words falling from her lips. "I'm okay."Link exhaled, bowing his head under the sheer weight of his relief. He would hug her if he knew it wouldn't hurt her. Zelda dropped her hand from his arm, laughing weakly."Did we manage it?" she asked. Link had not even stopped to check."I think so," he nodded.He stayed at her side as she sipped from his water skin and slowly regained her strength. It wasn't until she eventually drifted off to sleep that he stood and unstrapped the Master Sword, leaving it resting against the mossy wall."It was you," he said to it, not quite believing his own words. At first the Sword did not respond, but just as Link settled into his own bedroll, he heard it speak.
The song is felt by those who are worthy of it.
And heard by those who are in need of it.
Despite the toll it had taken, the ritual had indeed succeeded. The ruins on the peak had been bleached a brilliant white, and the clearing of the corruption had revealed an entrance leading down into the subterranean heart of the Citadel.Link had not mustered the courage to broach the events of the previous night. Whatever had happened, their success with the ritual had bolstered Zelda’s spirits further, and she was determined to explore the Citadel depths. Using the Sheikah Slate to illuminate the dark hallways, they descended into the fortress, Zelda leading the way. If there had been Malice underneath the peak, it too had been destroyed. And aside from a few collapsed balconies and doorways, the Citadel was in surprisingly good condition.They explored a huge underground dining hall. The fighting had not reached this chamber, and the still, stale air that had been sealed underneath the peak had served to preserve the hall. Three rows of long wooden tables ran the length of the room, flanked by low and sturdy-looking benches. Tall candlesticks were scattered along the tables. Tapestries bearing the Hyrulean crest lined the walls, as did various portraits of respected Knights of the Academy. Older men and women, faces lined with age and solemnity...Link examined the portraits, reading the plaques below each portrait in turn. He recognised a few of the faces, but none of the names.Zelda stood by a portrait of the King at the head of the room. It was an older painting, and the date etched on the plaque showed that it had been painted in the years before either Link or Zelda had been born. The King's hair was an ashen blonde and fell thick to his shoulders, though his face was no less stern than it had been in the days before the Calamity. Zelda reached up and placed a hand on the frame, sighing softly as she looked up at the portrait."We avenged you," she told the painting. "I only hope it was enough."The portrait was flanked by two smaller portraits; on the left a middle-aged man with wide shoulders and ink black hair pulled into a low bun, and on the right an elderly man, dressed in navy-blue robes adorned at the chest with the crest of Hyrule, embroidered in thick red thread. The plaques displayed their titles: Battlemaster Otra and Chief Advisor Voswann, the right and left hands of the King. Link gazed upon the hard face and savvy eyes of the Battlemaster, and felt a now-familiar sense of recollection. Otra of Old Lurelin Village; that was what the plaque read."I remember him," Link breathed, stepping closer to the portrait. The Battlemaster had been a friend of his father's. The memory was clear, as though it had never been forgotten. He was sitting by his father at a feast, aged no more than ten. Otra and his father had been telling drunken tales of their exploits, their great belly laughs filling the hall; Link's father patted him on the back, pointed to the dark-haired Battlemaster and said, 'You'll know this man better than I do by the time you're a knight.'And then it was gone. His father's voice had been so crisp; as if he had been in the room with them, speaking the words directly into Link's ear.Zelda all but materialised beside him. "I remember him as well," she murmured, finger tracing the edges of Otra's plaque. "He and my father would argue for hours. He never approved of the excavations of the Sheikah technology. All risk and no reward, he said."More flashes of Link's training came back one after the other; the days in the sparring yard, the bruises that marked his body, the stern but ever calm instruction from Otra himself. Don't rely on your strength alone, boy, he'd chided Link. Use your wits. Keep your focus. You can't hear the song with a clouded mind. And the training was more than just fighting, Link remembered. Otra had taught them to meditate as well. To maintain their calm in the face of any foe, and to approach any challenge with a level mind."I remember that he was always late for meetings with Father. He was so often in that training yard," Zelda reminisced.That was true as well, Link realised. Otra's role as Battlemaster did not mandate that he spend time training the would-be knights, or that he train the knights at all. But Otra had seen them all through, eye to eye and blade to blade. And it was Otra that recommended Link to the King."He was a good teacher," Link said as the tide of memories began to recede. Drawing her gaze from Otra's portrait, Zelda appraised him with a warm but bittersweet smile."He must have been," she agreed.On their climb back to the Citadel Peak, Link's mind had been occupied by the vestiges of the new memories. It seemed such a vast and intolerable loss; so much talent and so much vigour was there among the Hylians, and now it was all gone. Rebuilding was not enough. There had to be some way to preserve what once was.One idea had come to him, however. Otra's words, instructing him to listen for the song; they reminded Link of the way the Master Sword had spoken to him the night before. They had both told him to focus; to keep his calm. To meditate, Link surmised."I was thinking," he began once he and Zelda returned to camp. "There's something we could try."Zelda was busy inspecting the base of Akkala Tower, and the damage the Calamity's corruption had done to the peak."Sorry, what did you say?" she asked, putting away her Slate."Battlemaster Otra taught all of us how to meditate," Link shrugged, not wanting to sound to committed to his idea. "I thought it might help you."She squinted at him, her face pensive and taut."Help you keep a clear head," Link explained. Zelda pondered the idea, a finger lazily scratching her chin."If you say so," she said, her tone more congenial than enthused.They returned to the Eastern Battlements overlooking Tarrey Town, and Zelda sat cross-legged on the mossy cobblestones. Link thought of the Battlemaster's face, and tried to place himself within the memory. Where was I? What did I do? What did I say? Gradually, Otra's teachings resurfaced as though they were instinct."Concentrate on your breathing. You can close your eyes. And just…" he paused, trying to remember the exact words. "In and out. Just breathe."Zelda closed her eyes. Link watched her breathe; the slow and rhythmic rising and falling of her shoulders. He sat down next to her, crossing his legs and mirroring her posture. Taking one last lingering look at the lake below, he closed his eyes."Otra would say… it was something about ducks," Link explained clumsily.Beside him Zelda laughed. “Ducks?”“Yes, uh… No I remember now,” he took a deep breath, putting on a soothing, authoritative voice. “We observe good thoughts, like ducks on the water. And bad thoughts—““Are geese?”Link ignored her. “Clouds. We let them pass like clouds.”“Okay. Clouds,” Zelda repeated, though he sensed laughter still lingering in her voice.For a few minutes they sat in silence. Link extended his awareness to the sounds behind them, listening for anything suspicious - just in case. He could hear the rustle of tree leaves and the whistle of the wind, and the lapping water of Lake Akkala below.Among the sounds of the wild, Zelda's voice was soft and sweet. "What are you thinking about?"Link's eyes snapped open. He peered to his left; the Princess had was gazing down at the water. He wanted to tell her again; the thoughts were meant to be observed, not shared. But Impa's words were on his mind, like a warning told in a fable. Support. That is what she needs."Er, well-" Link raised a hand to the back of his neck, and scratched the nape."Tell me.”There was no denying her. "Lunch, actually," he said with a smile. "What game we can find near here. I was going to ask if I could borrow the Slate."When he looked over, she'd shut her eyes again. "What are you thinking about?" he asked cautiously.She did not move, and for a second seemed not to hear him. "Home," she said suddenly."The Castle?""I suppose so," Zelda agreed. "I can still remember what my room looked like. I can run my hands along the walls, sit at my desk and place each and every thing. My chair, my books, my mother's portrait...all of it."Link didn't know what to say. He realised he had sat slightly closer to her than he'd thought, and that their knees were touching."Do you want to go to the Castle?" he asked. "I could take you there-"Her emerald eyes opened and she gave him a familiar, scolding look."-I mean, we could go there."Zelda closed her eyes and smiled. "Yes, I think so," She returned her focus to her breathing, deep and measured. "I would like that."They met Nell again at the base of Akkala Citadel. The previously somber man was brimming with excitement when he saw them. He had a Goron and a Hylian in tow, who Link recognized as Greyson and Hudson from Tarrey Town. They exchanged handshakes and pleasantries, with Hudson reporting that his wife Rhondson had given birth to a baby girl."A Gerudo girl with red hair," Hudson added. "As we expected."They soon found the reason behind Nell's renewed enthusiasm. Akkala Citadel had been enveloped in a sphere of golden light just as he had arrived in Tarrey Town, as he explained"All of Tarrey Town saw it!” the Goron Greyson piped up. "Shone brighter than the belly of Death Mountain.""And when it was done, I saw that the Citadel Peak was clear!" Nell exclaimed. "All that corruption gone! The Goddess herself must have willed it."Link opened his mouth to explain, but could not. What would he say? Would the trio even believe him?"It must have been a miracle," Zelda chimed in before he could speak. Link caught the corners of her mouth lifting in amusement."Let's not waste time, Nell," Hudson urged. "We need to see what's left of the Citadel."Link and Zelda left the trio to their exploration, and made for the nearby stables to retrieve their horses. It was late afternoon by the time they set off north through the Akkala Highlands towards the Akkala Ancient Tech Lab, but Zelda was determined to make good time. And Link was happy to risk riding at night if it meant expediting their trip. The incident from the night prior had been stewing within him all day. You need to talk to her about it, he told himself. What if it happens again?The rain was relentless and unceasing. Whether falling in a persistent fine mist or bucketing down as a thunderstorm tore across the sky, there was no escaping it, and the rain seemed to intensity the further north they rode. By the time they reached the mountain pass, Zelda was sniffly with a cold, and Link could feel his own chest tightening and his throat itch as he too began to fall ill. They were both running a low fever, and their provisions were beginning to dwindle. The rain made hunting a chore; Link's own sniffles scaring away game, and the rain in his eyes affecting his aim. By the time he had hunted enough for supper, he was so tired that Zelda had to take over the cooking. Their days were miserable and damp, their meals lean and charred, and their conversations clipped as they tried not to be irritable with each other. Eventually Zelda fell so ill that she shivered in her saddle, even when the sun shone, though her skin was always hot to the touch. They reached the East Akkala Stables in a daze, both still sniffing and coughing. Link awoke the next evening to the terrifying realisation that he had slept for nearly an entire day - though Zelda had not noticed, for she had done the same."I don't remember this aspect of travelling," she croaked as they ate supper."Me neither," Link murmured. He tried to stretch the soreness from his muscles, but he was too tired and ill for it to have any effect. They passed an hour in a gloomy silence, punctuated by Zelda's soft sniffles."I never thanked you," Zelda finally said. She was sipping a from a warm mug of Hyrule Herb tea, and was holding it close to her face. "After what happened on the peak."Link shifted awkwardly. He had been secretly hoping she'd forgotten all about it. The whole incident had saddled him with feelings and thoughts that he could not parse."I must have frightened you," Zelda continued. Link gave a small, embarrassed nod. He began to search for the words that he wanted to say, but there was too much. The competing thoughts bombarded him. He felt himself begin to shut down; he pushed the thoughts away and let the feelings pass him by. Just like Otra's teachings - let it all float past. This was how he had managed in the before, right? The silent knight, stoic in the face of adversity.This is not the same, and you know it, he chided himself.Zelda didn't seem to notice. She spoke of her burden as if he could even begin to understand. "I don't know why it happened. I only know that...that I'm getting stronger. I feel better every day, I do."Link did not have an answer for her. All he could do was try to search for a solution. A remedy, of any kind. "I think we should turn back," he eventually confessed."What? No," Zelda protested. "We have work to do.""I don't know that we're ready," Link admitted. "Not after what happened.""But we succeeded!""What if it gets worse?""Worse?""The… rituals. I don't know how to protect you from that.""Protect me? It’s my power we’re using.""What if something else happens?”“Like what?”“What if it… what if it kills you?”"Is that all I am then? Something to insulate from all possible harm? Even now?"Link closed up, and stood from the fire. "I don't know," he said flatly.There were words he could not say. Feelings he could not wrangle into thoughts. I almost lost you, he wanted to tell her. He was sworn to protect her; he was raised as a knight to stand at her side. He was chosen by a sword to wield it in her service. If he lost her, he may just lose himself. The Princess glared at him incredulously, but said nothing. Link walked back into the stables, and collapsed into his bed.It was two days later - two excruciating days of barely speaking and avoiding each other’s gaze - that Link and Zelda arrived at the farthest reach of Deep Akkala.Even in the early hours of the day, with all of Akkala blanketed in fog, the Akkala Ancient Tech Lab buzzed with activity. The ancient flame in its central furnace flickered in the dawn light, and the windmill on the workshop roof spun steadily with the northern sea breeze. From inside the workshop, the whirs of the ancient oven Cherry could be heard. And atop the workshop, hunched over the eyepiece of the enormous telescope that sat on the workshop roof, was the workshop's own director, Robbie. He paused to adjust the telescope's position, and returned to the lens, muttering something under his breath."Is that really him?" Zelda murmured as they approached.Link went on ahead, arms waving as he called out as loud as he could, ‘Hoiiii!’The elderly Sheikah man had not seen them coming, and started from his scope at the noise. The twin eyepieces of his goggles whirred and rotated as he looked down upon them, but soon a great smile spread across his face."Champion! Princess!" he cried out, waving with both hands. And then he disappeared into the workshop."Jerrin!" Link heard the old man shout. "Wake up, look who it is!"The workshop door burst open, and Robbie greeted them with open arms. His wife Jerrin waded sleepily over to the door, but her face lit up when she saw them. "I knew you would do it!" the director said as he lead them into the workshop. "We saw Vah Rudania's attack on Hyrule Castle from our front door. I am sure Impa is well pleased.""She is," Zelda told him. "She had heard of our success.""Good, good," Robbie said, scratching his chin. "But still work remains. Otherwise you would not be here."Jerrin extended her hands out to the Princess. "A pleasure to meet you," she beamed."And you," Zelda nodded. "Are you the director's assistant?"Robbie and Jerrin exchanged a knowing look. The Hylian woman giggled. "In work and in life. I'm Jerrin, Robbie's wife."Zelda seemed taken aback at that. "Oh! But, you work together?"“We do," Jerrin smiled.Robbie led them to the workshop roof while Jerrin began preparing breakfast. His telescope was angled towards Akkala Citadel. He explained that he had been examining their work on the Malice that remained from a distance, and that it appeared as though none had returned. Link stepped around the base of the telescope while Robbie detailed his research, running his hand over the large gears and cogs that kept it in position."Anything else to report?" Zelda asked."If you came for an update on my research, there is not much to tell you," Robbie said. "Not a single active Guardian has been spotted.""We haven't seen any either," Zelda remarked. Link peeked through the telescope again, and spotted a pair of dilapidated Guardian Skywatchers at the base of the Citadel.“But not to worry. My research is not complete," Robbie said. "With Cherry and Jerrin's help - and with the Hyrule Castle library back at our disposal - I will commence work on attempting to reactivate the Guardians."Link's eyes snapped up from the telescope, and he and Zelda cried out in unison.“No!” they said together, startling the old man. For a moment their eyes met, and Link knew they were remembering the same moment. Burning fields all around them. The whirs of the mechanical beasts, possessed with the singular mission to destroy all that they found.Robbie did not back down, his hands firmly on his hips. "The Calamity is gone. There is no risk.""There is a risk," Zelda said sternly. "We never learned to control them. We don't know how the Calamity might have affected them."“These are questions that can be answered through research, Princess! I cannot believe that you of all people would advocate against this.""I am just trying to protect our kingdom.""That is what the Guardians were for!""Not anymore. I’m sorry. As your Princess I’m ordering you to wait. There are those that remain who remember the Guardians, and remember the destruction they caused."Robbie grumbled and crossed his arms. “Well… I remember it too, Princess. I remember what we lost that day.”“We will get it back, I promise. Link and I will go to Hyrule Castle, salvage what remains, and maybe then we can talk of Guardians.”The director begrudgingly agreed, though he pointedly urged her not to dawdle lest curious travellers take over the Castle for themselves.“We thought Hyrule Castle was impenetrable, but the Calamity changed that,” he said."Just like the Citadel," Link pointed out."Yes," Robbie frowned. "Yes, indeed."“So, where are you off to next?” Jerrin asked them innocently over a breakfast of creamy-heart soup. There was no space to eat inside the crowded tech lab, so they sat outside on wooden stools, bowls of soup in hand, with the kneading landscape of Deep Akkala stretching out before them.Zelda looked to Link, expecting him to announce they would be returning swiftly to the safe embrace of Kakariko. But in return he gave her the same expectant look.“Well, we, uh—“ Zelda begun, nervously stirring her soup.“Impa mentioned you went to Lanayru,” Robbie said. Both Link and Zelda raised their brows at this, to which Robbie took offense. “What? Impa writes. She told me all about your adventures, yours in particular.” He pointed a soup spoon towards Link.“Zora’s Domain is where we discovered the cleansing ritual, though it is still being refined,” Zelda said sheepishly.She had to admit, after two days thinking on it, that perhaps Link’s concern for her had not been misplaced. The ritual had been difficult each time, frightening even, and on Akkala Citadel something had changed. The amount of power locked within her and within the Master Sword was unfathomable, and for a moment she’d felt it all.But they would figure it out. They had no choice. Fate or destiny or something else had brought Link and Zelda together to rid Hyrule of all remaining traces of Calamity Ganon, and in lieu of any other real direction, Zelda was determined that this was their new path, for now at least.“I noticed that Vah Ruta is still angled towards Hyrule Castle,” Robbie said. “Does she have a pilot?”“A pilot?!” Zelda was stunned at the idea. “No. Ruta is dormant.”“Did the Zora not ask for one?”“I didn’t even suggest it. Vah Ruta’s previous pilot… well…”“The Zora still mourn,” Link added.“But that was not Vah Ruta’s fault, that was Ganon,” Robbie said. “The Divine Beasts could still be useful.”“I thought we discussed this, not half an hour ago,” Zelda countered.“I’m not talking of the Guardians.”“The Divine Beasts are just as dangerous.”Robbie removed his goggles and pointedly set them aside, revealing drooped and heavy lidded eyes, which were bordered on all sides by deep wrinkles. He looked between the two youths before him.“We are talking of the technology of my people, which was lost to us for countless generations. I can abide letting in weather and disappear, if indeed it has perished. But those Divine Beasts are alive, in their own way. They deserve better than to be monuments of death.”Zelda clasped her soup spoon tightly, acutely aware of the truth in Robbie’s words. She did not want the Divine Beasts or any of the Sheikah technology lost but… they knew so little about them, about Ganon, about anything. What if the risk outweighed the reward, for the second time in their lifetimes?“I don’t know how to make this choice,” she said finally. “I can’t, if the risk is…”“What? Ganon comes back?” Robbie said with a laugh. “Don’t be so modest. Our people did not fight and die for you to doubt whether you crushed him like a seed and sent him back to whatever hellish realm he came from.”“I…I suppose,” Zelda said. She wasn’t sure she could recount exactly what happened that day, and looked to Link for reassurance.He nodded. “That is what happened.”“Only you can induct new pilots, Princess,” Robbie went on. “Otherwise who knows what could happen to the Divine Beasts.”By then they had finished their breakfast and Jerrin was beginning to gather their bowls; Link leapt to his feet dutifully to help her collect and clean the dishes and cookware. Robbie was restrapping his goggles to his face, adjusting some dials on the sides of each lens as he did, and all the while Zelda sat in pensive silence.Was everyone so quarrelsome these days, or was it just her? She did not want to know the answer.By mid-morning, Robbie was buried in a huge old book while Jerrin was disassembling and cleaning one of the spare telescopes, and Link was preparing his and Zelda’s things to make a small camp outside. Zelda meanwhile had spent an hour or so using the main telescope to examine each of the four Divine Beasts - none of whom beside Vah Ruta having moved an inch since they were used to defeat Ganon - and now that she was done she announced her findings to the whole laboratory.“Alright fine,” she said as she came down the stairs. “We’ll do it!”Robbie spun around in his chair to face her, and Jerrin calmly placed the lens she was cleaning on a nearby shelf, while Link appeared at the laboratory door with a tarp in hand.“Go on, dear,” Jerrin said.“We will find new pilots for the Divine Beasts. I can think of once such candidate in Zora’s Domain. I just want to know how I know I’m not putting the Divine Beasts at risk of possession again.”“You don’t,” Robbie answered. “But it’s either you take that risk, or someone else does.”“I can live with that.”She looked to Link, who was already folding up the tent he had been building. “I’ll pack,” he said, and disappeared back outside.Zelda was sitting on the steps leading into the tech lab, watching Link reassemble their travel packs as she planned out the route south on the Sheikah Slate, when Robbie sat down beside her.“You know, Impa also mentioned that things didn’t exactly go to plan in Lanayru. I bet the Zora’s opinion of you might… improve… if you find them a new pilot.”Zelda made an indignant sound not unlike squeezing the air from an octo balloon, and slapped the Sheikah Slate down onto her lap. Beneath his goggles, Robbie’s thin mouth was quivering into a smile.“I– That was– How do you–” she narrowed her eyes. No. The feint was recognised now. “Okay, now that was too far.”Robbie threw up his hands. “Alright, alright, yes. Sorry. You probably guessed what else Impa told me?”“To lecture me until I came around to your side?”“That was loosely the plan yes. I practiced my grave, somber voice for days.”"I was wondering where this serious old man act was coming from.”“Old? I’m one hundred and twenty three years young! Not all of us got sealed in a Castle or a Shrine.”Zelda laughed, but still the memory of her time in Hyrule Castle hurt, even a little, and she sighed.“I’m sorry, I shouldn’t have brought that up.” Robbie said. He took off his goggles a second time, and smiled up at her. “It’s good to have you back with us, kiddo. Both of you.”Link was finishing up with their packs and Zelda felt a rising apprehension just looking at him, thinking on their unresolved argument.She turned back to Robbie. “You can’t come with us? Things haven’t exactly been… smooth sailing.”He shook his head. “Back before the Calamity, when it was our duty to look after you, I’d have accepted. But like it or not I am old now. I can only reiterate what I know Impa told you. You need to do things your own way, including choosing whether we should salvage what remains.”If only it were that simple. If she only knew that Link felt the same.It was midday by the time Link and Zelda were ready to depart south, stocked up with provisions for the road from Robbie and Jerrin’s pantry and ready to travel back to Zora’s Domain.The pair of researchers stood at their laboratory door, waving them off. Robbie gave them a particularly enthusiastic salute, with the vigour of the rockstar researcher that Zelda remembered he had been in their youth.As they descended the hill towards the East Akkala Stables, they stopped to examine a decayed Guardian, whose gargantuan body was half buried in the ground.“I fought this one,” Link recalled. “Dodged it’s fire. Moved on when it was distracted.”But now it was without power, and its singular beady eye gazed unseeingly, unaffected by their presence. Link placed a hand on its rusted outer shell, tracing one of the decorative swirls that swam across its body. Zelda could remember watching him fight the Guardians. He had killed more of its kind than she could count.“This one hit you, didn’t it?” She said. “I saw it. From the castle.”“Yeah,” Link said, rubbing an arm. “Left a pretty bad burn.”“I remember when we got the first one to move. Before they were possessed. We had so much hope,” Zelda mused.She placed a hand on the Guardian’s shell, as Link had. Here it was, the symbol of their Kingdom’s destruction, the very thing that had killed her father, that had burned her home, and now it was sleeping peacefully on a hillside. She understood Robbie’s desire to see the Guardians, and all of the Sheikah technology, restored to what it had once been, but could not ignore the hatred and fear that lingered within her, and perhaps in Link too. But still, seeing the Guardian laying lifeless and robbed of its original purpose; it gave her pause, and filled her with sorrow.The Rito courier at the Wetland Stables had quoted 100 rupees to deliver a letter to Zora’s Domain, and Zelda could not tell if this price was as absurd as it seemed, having never had to pay for such a service before. In fact she’d never had money of her own, and still didn’t, and had been relying on Link’s modest savings thus far. She made a note to secure rupees of her own, somehow.Instinct had told Zelda to surprise the Zora and not forworn them of their visit, to see how the Zora were treating Vah Ruta without the prying eyes of the Champion or the Princess upon them. She knew from what little time she had spent in their court that there were schemers and squabblers among them, adorned in their proud jewels and perched in their marble seats of the gallery. Any small advantage was one she was tempted to take.However, if she had learned anything from her time in Zora’s Domain it was that protocol was tantamount to law, and politeness was a weapon as sharp as any sword. So she wrote a very kind letter to Larella, Personal Assistant to King Dorephan, requesting an audience with him in seven day’s time, if it pleased them to learn of a way Divine Beast Vah Ruta could be protected from harm. As soon as the Rito Courier departed, Link and Zelda set off towards the Domain. There was no point waiting for a response. There would be no negotiating, whatever the Zora decided.Mercifully, this plan seemed to work, and a week later Link and Zelda met King Dorephan, Sidon and Larella on the piers of the Eastern Reservoir one fine and sunny morning. There Zelda laid out to the offer clearly - Zelda could induct a pilot for Van Ruta, giving the Zora free and full control of their Divine Beast as it had been before the Calamity."My concern, Princess, is the danger Vah Ruta poses," the King said once she was done. "I need not tell you that our Divine Beast killed my daughter, and nearly killed my son as well."No, he needn’t, given Zelda had been there for both events, and was acutely aware of the power of the Sheikah technology — but Zelda did not say any of this.Though she and Link were still barely on speaking terms, she had been considering Link his teachings. Let the thoughts pass by, like clouds. To Zelda's surprise the words had resonated with her, and they worked at quelling her temper and baser impulses. They were the only thing that had ever worked.Zelda took a deep breath, and let the wave of frustration pass."I understand your concern," she told the Zora King. "I suggest then that Vah Ruta need not be piloted regularly. Myself and Link can induct a pilot, aid them in moving Vah Ruta to a safer location, and then the Zora will only need take control of the Divine Beast in emergency situations.""Emergency situations? Elaborate,” Lady Larella said."You don't mean fighting do you?" Prince Sidon cut in. He was standing by his father, now occupying more the role of the Zora heir than the role of their friend. His face was almost as solemn as his father's, though softened by his youthful exuberance.Zelda recited the reasons she had memorised, trying her best not to sound rehearsed. "Vah Ruta is an excellent swimmer. Were anything ever to happen to Zora's Domain, she could be used to evacuate your citizens. Or, if moved here, to the Eastern Reservoir, she could be aid in regulating the water levels in the event of a high rainfall season, or a large storm."The King nodded slowly as she spoke, though his face gave no indication of his inner thoughts. Zelda waited for a response, and realised she was holding her breath. Link's words were in her ear once more. Focus on your breathing."You have clearly thought this through, Princess. All of these benefits would do the Domain well, and would please Lady Mipha to see them realised." The King almost seemed to smile, but then his face hardened. "But I cannot just give this responsibility to anyone.""Then it is clear," Prince Sidon asserted. "I will pilot Vah Ruta.""No," the King said firmly. "That cannot happen.""It cannot be anyone else. I am heir to Zora’s Domain, I must protect it," Sidon argued.The King swept his arm aside, fins flicking with anger, his sudden frustration indicating that this was not the first time they had argued on the matter. "I will not send another one of my children into that thing!"Sidon showed no remorse, only placating logic. "Someone must be sent. The Zora must take control. Those who attacked me must have sought to take Vah Ruta for themselves."King Dorephan scowled darkly. "I have had enough of this, Sidon.""As have I, Father. The Champion and the Princess come before us with an immense gift, and you shun them out of fear? One hundred years have passed. I may not have known my sister well, but I know she would not have us leave Vah Ruta vulnerable out of fear of being hurt.""Enough! You have made yourself clear!" bellowed the King. He sighed and looked towards Link and Zelda. "I apologise that you saw this weakness.""There is no need," Zelda said. The King bowed his head, and thought for a long moment.Lady Larella filled the silence with pleasantries. “Thank you for your letter,” she said to Zelda. “Will you be requesting accommodation in Zora’s Domain?”“We can room at the inn, thank you. Like any other travellers.”Larella nodded. “A humble gesture.”Was that truly a compliment? Zelda doubted it, if she was to be honest.Finally the King spoke. "I will not condone or condemn what I know you will do.” He leaned forward, his voice grave and intense, and the weight of his gaze bearing down on Zelda. "Just know, Princess. If my son is harmed, the consequences will fall to you."This was as close as they would get to the King’s approval, and this seemed to cheer Sidon at least, for he was punching the air with joy.Vah Ruta had thankfully been left undisturbed. The Divine Beast remained semi-buoyant in the deep lake of her high plateau, her engravings pulsing with a faint cerulean glow. Zelda ran a quick diagnostics with the Sheikah Slate, and determining that Ruta was in good condition, cleared the trio for entry. She teleported to Vah Ruta's travel gate, while Link and Sidon swam across the clear lake towards the Divine Beast. They met in the lofty chamber that housed Ruta's main control unit, the morning sun streaming in through the wide windows that lined the outer walls of the Beast."With me, Sidon," Zelda instructed, her voice reverberating across the high stone walls. "Link—“ she hesitated to give the order.“I’ll keep watch.”Zelda nodded. “Thank you.”She led Sidon over to the main control unit and scanned her Sheikah Slate. Behind them, Link stood ready at the entrance to the chamber.Zelda took a deep breath. “Okay, if I remember correctly, Ruta's vital functions and power level can be controlled by the Sheikah Slate from within the structure itself. However actual control over her movements and abilities only requires that you be registered as her pilot. And…” she shuffled nervously on her feet. "That Ruta accepts you."As she spoke she felt her voice waver. Before the Calamity, she had aided the original Champions in learning to control their Divine Beasts - but she had never actually piloted one alone. Sidon did not seem to notice."Fascinating," he murmured. "To think how ancient this technology is.""Ancient and unlike anything in all of Hyrule," Zelda agreed. She motioned towards the terminal. "Stand before the control unit, Sidon. The Slate will be used to register you, and then we will know if Ruta has accepted you."Sidon did as he was bid, placing a hand on either side of the terminal. His eyes were fixed on the ornate Eye of the Sheikah at the terminal centre. If he was afraid, he did not show it.Zelda raised the Sheikah Slate, and tapped through the registration function. It was as quick as taking a photo; the Slate beeped twice and a small note reading Registration Complete appeared at the bottom of the screen. All around them, the chamber was filled with the deafening trumpeting of an elephant. The chamber shook and the low waters around their ankles rippled and splashed. At the entrance, Zelda saw Link reach for his sword and shield. The sound continued, and Vah Ruta shook so violently that they were nearly thrown from their feet.And then it stopped. The noise and the rumbling ceased. The waters still splashed at Zelda's feet, but otherwise Vah Ruta was still. Apprehensively, Zelda raised the Slate again to check Ruta's vitals."Prince Sidon," she said. The Prince eyed her nervously, and stepped slowly away from the terminal. Zelda lowered the Slate and smiled. "Vah Ruta has accepted you. I officially induct you into the role as pilot of Divine Beast Vah Ruta."The Prince beamed down at her before bowing his head and raising a fist to his heart. "It's an honour, Princess. Let's hope we can do Mipha proud."It took nearly the rest of the day before Zelda felt they were ready to move Vah Ruta to the Eastern Reservoir. Much like her own abilities, control of Vah Ruta required intuition and experimentation. As the Champions before had discovered, and as Robbie had advised her back in Akkala, the Beasts were not automatons; somewhere amongst the machinery and stone they seemed to have a soul.Sidon however did well to allay her fears. His enthusiasm was unmatched, and his purity of spirit was reminiscent of his sister's. He guided Vah Ruta with both firmness and compassion, and by the time the afternoon was waning, he had learned to control her by voice alone. Zelda stepped him through instructing Vah Ruta to move back and forth, to raise or lower her trunk and eventually, to dive and resurface. The Sheikah had built Ruta in such a way that she could be completely sealed from the inside, allowing the Beast to be submerged without damaging her interior (or washing away her pilot, for that matter). Finally, as the western sun began to set, Zelda gave Sidon the clear to submerge Vah Ruta fully, and take her through the dense and sprawling underwater caverns that snaked their way underneath Zora's Domain. The Beast groaned and whirred as each entrance and cavity was covered and sealed with panels of ancient metal and stone. The interior glowing etchings and main control unit provided a dim but serviceable light, and soon the entire structure was shuddering and rocking as they descended into the waters of the plateau."How do I know which way to take her?" Sidon asked. He was standing by the main control unit, a hand resting gently on the terminal as if to reassure the Beast that he was there to guide her."Ruta should know where to go," Zelda replied. For ten tense minutes they waited inside the dark chamber, listening to the rush of waters around them and the low groaning of Ruta's mechanical body. Zelda stood by the main control unit, inhaling deeply to calm her nerves, while Link maintained his guard at the chamber entrance. Ruta lumbered slowly through the waters, her movements gradual and deliberate. With no view through the thick stone walls, Zelda had no way of telling if she was taking them the correct way. Sidon, however, was determined and calm; he kept his hand on the terminal during their entire voyage through the canals, murmuring encouragement and praise as Ruta made her way through the waters."We're almost there," he announced suddenly. "I can feel it."Sure enough, Vah Ruta soon shuddered to a halt, and Zelda could hear the waters break around them. The Divine Beast roared as she raised herself above the water's surface, and light filled the chamber once the panels that had sealed her were slid open. The trio hurried to Vah Ruta's travel gate and saw that Sidon had maneuvered her to the docks of Rutela Dam, on the south side of the Eastern Reservoir. The first thing to catch their attention were two Zoran guards, whose silver Zora armor and long fighting spears caught the gleaming light of the setting sun. The guards waved excitedly at them from the pier, cheering in amazement."Well, I would say that was a success," Sidon grinned as they waved back at the Guards. He helped Link and Zelda disembark onto the docks, and walked over to the guards with arms outstretched."Rilla! Finn! Did you see that?" he called to them before pointing towards Vah Ruta. "What a marvelous Beast we have!""And what a marvelous pilot," Zelda added as she caught up to him. The Guards were completely enamoured, and demanded their Prince tell them all about his new skill as Vah Ruta's pilot. Zelda too was swept up in the celebration; she had not expected, or even hoped, that Vah Ruta would take to Sidon as well as she had. He is Mipha's brother, she reminded herself."What a gift," Rilla beamed. She was a young grey-scaled Zora, with sweet round eyes. The other was Finn, a middle-aged Zora with a weathered face, though his age did not temper his excitement."We'll be working under Vah Ruta's shadow from now on, Rilla," he said to his younger companion. "It will be an honour."Zelda felt a tap on her shoulder. It was Link, and his face was knotted with concern. He pulled her gently away from the trio of Zora, and muttered, "We need to go.""What is it?" Zelda said in a low voice. She quickly peered over her shoulder to the Zora; they had not noticed.He cocked his head, discreetly motioning towards the rocky hills that flanked the docks. "Movement. On both sides."Zelda tried to subtly crane her neck, scanning the rocks above for any signs of life. At first she saw little more than the rustling of the trees on the outcrop - but then, at the corner of her eye; the glint of a golden weapon, and the flicker of a shadow across the rocks."Teleport back to the Domain, we'll catch up," Link told her."No, I won’t leave you—.""It’s not safe—""I will not have this argument again. Not anymore—"An arrow whistled past her face, snapping on the marble of the docks. Link moved like lightning, raising his shield in front of her. Zelda spun back towards Sidon and saw two figures leaping from their hiding places among the rocky flank to the east. From the western hills, three more were advancing, all armed. Three of the five were tall and lean, with golden weapons and flowing red hair. Gerudo!Then she was being shoved forwards, towards Sidon and the Zora guards; Link had an iron grip on her right arm, and was all but dragging her across the docks. “Go back to the Domain!” Link ordered the Zora. “Take her and go!”Another rain of arrows sailed past them, hitting the water, the marble, whistling innocently. In the chaos of being hauled across the marble by Link, Zelda managed to turn to see a Gerudo warrior land on the docks with a golden bow in hand, her brow darkened by war paint. Without warning, Link released his grip and Zelda fell to her knees; dazed, she watched as Link raised his crossbow towards the Gerudo woman, firing a bolt in her direction. It caught her shoulder, and she tumbled from the docks into the water. All around was clamour of shouts and steel as Link and the Zora engaged the sudden assailants. Rilla was fending off the two from the left: a Gerudo expertly wielding a shining scimitar and a Hylian woman with a long spear. Zelda caught a glimpse of Finn just as he charged the fourth and fifth attackers — another Gerudo and a stocky Hylian man — his silver sword flashing and ringing. Then Sidon was at her side, helping her to her feet and leading her towards the Eastern Reservoir. For a moment Link was gone, and Zelda realised she had been shouting his name, until she saw him beside Rilla, sword and shield ready.“We’ll have to swim, hold on tight!” Sidon said to Zelda and only then did she understand where Sidon was taking her.“No! I can’t—!” She flailed helplessly, unable to match even a fraction of Sidon’s strength, and suddenly among the ringing steel and her own cries she heard the sound of boots on stone. She turned back towards the dam just in time to see that the Hylian man had slipped past Finn, and was charging at them with a great blade raised high. Sidon pushed Zelda behind him, and met the Hylian charger with a powerful clenched fist, landing a solid blow across the man's jaw. The Hylian flew backwards across the docks, landing unceremoniously on the marble. It was at that moment, from her vantage point at the very edge of the fighting, that Zelda realised something about their attackers; they all wore that same embroidered blue neckerchief that she and Link had found on the Yiga assassin some weeks before. Even the Gerudo, dressed otherwise in their traditional garb, bore the same blue accessory. A glint of sunlight caught one of the Zora guards' weapons, and Zelda's attention was drawn back to the fight. Finn had been cornered on the edge of the dam wall. He attempted to parry an incoming blow from his Gerudo attacker, but lost his footing. Flailing desperately, Finn managed to grab hold of the Gerudo woman, and together they disappeared over the edge of the dam into the gorge below. Zelda cried out in horror, but the pair were gone.Above, Sidon’s returned his focus to the Hylian man, who was recovering and with weak knees was wobbling back onto his feed. Sidon stood at the ready, unarmed but undeterred. “Alright you mackerel, what’s next?” He murmured under his breath. Just then, another arrow whistled past, narrowly missing Sidon's shoulder, but the Prince did not not seem to notice.Still crouched low on the marble deck, and hoping that no one would notice her, Zelda frantically scanned the hills for the hidden archer. She detected movement on the west side of the hills, maybe forty feet above the waters of the reservoir, and then she saw him, emerging from an outcrop was a tanned-skin man with red hair, wielding a brightly painted bow. His features were harsh, and his nose pointed and long, and Zelda surmised — though she could hardly bring herself to believe it — that he too was Gerudo. He reached back into his quiver, and drew another arrow, nocking it to the bowstring and aiming it towards Sidon.No! Zelda sprang to her feet, leaping into the Gerudo man's line of sight. Without time to think, she raised her hand in the direction of the archer. She’d never hit him from here, so she focused her power inwards, and under her will the fabric of reality begin to fold. The power warped and wound under and over itself until it was twisted into something physical...something real.Two arrows soared towards her almost in unison, but snapped like twigs before they met their intended target. In their place was a great, beaming barrier of light that had unfolded around Zelda’s raised hand. Up on the outcrop the Gerudo man scowled, firing another four arrows that continued to splinter ineffectually against the barrier. Behind Zelda, Sidon had finally succeeded in throwing the Hylian man into the reservoir, where he flailed just to stay afloat.“By the Goddess!” Sidon cried when he saw what Zelda had managed, but before she could explain, there was a piercing scream behind them. They turned in unison to see Rilla cut down the last Gerudo attacker, while Link and the Hylian woman still danced across the docks. She was fighting defensively, but gave no ground. Her long black hair swept about her face as she dodged Link's advance across the slippery marble, yet not once did she attempt a strike. From the outcrop Zelda heard the Gerudo man's voice echo down across the docks."Milagre!" he shouted. "To the Beast!""Yes, Chief!" the Hylian woman called back. She immediately disengaged from Link and dove into the water. Above, the Gerudo man had shouldered his bow and was racing to the edge of the outcrop. He vaulted off the rocks, pulling a Rito paraglider from his belt. Zelda caught a split-second glimpse at his neck as he flew overhead — he too wore a dark blue neckerchief, embroidered with thick white thread. And then the fragmented events fell into place: the attack on Vah Ruta that had nearly killed Sidon, the Yiga they had tussled on their way to Kakariko, and now this. These were what Robbie had warned her of — the opportunists waiting to take control of the Sheikah Technology for themselves. She ripped the Sheikah Slate from her belt and pulled up the map of Vah Ruta, quickly selecting the second travel gate situated at Ruta's main control unit. Link was calling her name, shouting for her to stop. Ignoring him, Zelda hit the teleport function on the Sheikah Slate, and closed her eyes.The first thing Zelda became aware of, as she materialised within Divine Beast Vah Ruta, was the growing sound of boots on stone. But she was bolstered to realise she had arrived at the Main Control Unit first, moments before the Hylian woman named Milagre appeared at the entrance to the towering chamber at Vah Ruta’s stern.When she saw Zelda, she smiled menacingly, and raised her spear."You will not take Ruta," Zelda said through shuddering breaths, raising both hands out in front of her chest.“Oh, won’t I?” Milagre seemed to laugh. “Is that a Sheikah Slate? So kind of you to bring it to us.”Zelda’s stomach turned; she placed a defensive hand over the Sheikah Slate at her belt. Of course in her impulsiveness she had brought these vagrants the very thing they needed to take Vah Ruta from them.Well not if she could help it. Link and Sidon were no doubt on their way; Zelda only needed to last until then. Steadying herself, her hands still shaking, she sent a thundering beam of energy forwards. Milagre dodged, boots splashing through the shallow waters."Impressive!" she mocked, dodging another incoming lance of golden light. "Hand over the Slate, child!"Zelda felt the blood rush to her head, and the fury pulse through her veins. "I'm not a child!" she shouted, sending a third bolt of energy towards Milagre. Again the woman dodged nimbly, before surging forward to close the distance between them.Zelda blocked the swift stab from Milagre's spear with a quickly-erected barrier, but the momentum of the blow knocked her backwards, and she faltered. The barrier fell. The second stab found her left shoulder, and a searing pain lanced down her arm. She cried out, the pain tearing through her flesh momentarily blinding her, but by some divine luck she still managed to summon a final barrage of energy. This one finally found its target, giving Zelda enough time to spin away from her attacker. She crashed against the chamber wall, sprinting as fast as she could, with no plan now except to run and keep this Milagre from getting her hands on the Sheikah Slate.Readying another energy surge between her hands, Zelda turned back towards Milagre, who was in close pursuit, and unleashed a crackling lance. It arced too high, soaring up and over the Hylian woman, as Zelda lost her footing and tumbled backwards into the shallow waters of the chamber. Her head rung against the stone, and she barely had enough clarity of thought to raise her hands to her face, and block Milagre’s leaping stab with a golden barrier. The spear ricocheted hard against it, and with a wail Milagre was launched all the way to the far side of the chamber.Both women took a moment then to catch their breath, hair and clothes now soaked through. But to Zelda’s horror, Milagre recovered, found her spear, and used it to stand. She began to stagger towards where Zelda still sat.“Give me the Slate,” she demanded through heaving breaths. Trembling, her arm dripping with blood and turning the shallow waters around her red, Zelda raised her hand again. She felt herself fading, her strength leaving her. Hylia help me. I can’t go on. But then there was shouting coming from outside the chamber, the ringing of steel and more boots on stone, and there was a flash of red and white as Sidon burst into the chamber and barrelled into Milagre before she could even turn. They tumbled and rolled across the shallow waters, Milagre's spear flying from her grasp and clanging against the stone wall of the chamber."Princess!" Sidon called out as he struggled to keep the Hylian woman down. "Take Link from Ruta and run!""What about you!?"Sidon blocked an incoming punch from Milagre. "Ruta and I have a plan," he said through gritted teeth.Though she did not understand, Zelda trusted him, and struggled to her feet, stumbling as fast as she could move from the chamber. She emerged into Vah Ruta’s cavernous central chamber, with its open ceiling and complex inner machinery. There, in the shadow of one of Vah Ruta’s enormous internal cogs, Link and the Gerudo man were trading blows. The Gerudo feinted left, and smacked the pommel of his Rito-made sword into Link's ribs. The knight staggered backwards, winded and wincing from the blow, the suddenness of the assault leaving him vulnerable. Lurching forward, Zelda raised a barrier between them just in time to block the second pommel strike that was intended for Link. The Gerudo’s sword bounced ineffectually off the barrier and slipped from his grip and both he and Link gazed at the shimmering barrier in shock. They turned in unison towards where Zelda stood, her golden hand outstretched.Through their confusion, the moment suspended in time, Zelda thought she caught a small, affected smile flicker across Link's face. She must have been a sight: soaked, bloodied and barely standing, but he smiled nonetheless.Then, starting with a snap like the shutting of a book, time barrelled forward once again. Zelda dropped her barrier, and Link used the opening this created to knock the Gerudo man to the ground with a devastating shield bash.He was at her side in an instant, their attackers forgotten.“Are you okay? Your arm—“Zelda didn’t answer, there wasn’t a moment to lose; she grabbed hold of him, and moved towards the nearest archway that would lead them from Vah Ruta.“We have to go!” she said when Link protested."What about Sidon!?""He’ll be fine!"“How can you know!?”They stopped just before one of the exits; behind them, the Gerudo man was beginning to stir.“I don’t, just trust me!”Link held firm.“Please.”Vah Ruta had begun to rattle and shudder, a thunderous trumpeting ringing out within the chamber. Zelda’s injured arm burned, and she suddenly felt dizzy. Without thinking, she let go of Link to bring a hand to where she’d been cut, gripping it tight as the pain surged.The next she knew Link had a hold of her, and was helping her onto his back, telling her to hold on and to close your eyes! Then there was a rush of noise as they plunged into the black waters of the reservoir, sinking down, down, down. Zelda held on tight as the water filled her ears, her clothes, her nose; a maelstrom of chaos all around, and she wondered if they were moving at all until abruptly they breached the surface, and Zelda gasped to fill her lungs with air. With the fading awareness, she felt herself lifted from the water and gently laid onto the cold marble of the docks. Someone was attending to her arm, murmuring it’s okay, you’re okay.There she lay barely breathing, last embers of consciousness flickering out, and as Divine Beast Vah Ruta disappeared beneath the surface of the Eastern Reservoir — with Sidon, Milagre, and the Gerudo still inside.Once more they stood before the Zora King and his court. Zelda had sought them out as soon as she awoke the next morning. Link had healed her stab wound enough to stop the bleeding, and then carried her back to the Domain, succumbing to his own exhaustion not long after. There had been no time to do much else, and thus the pretty white robe Paya had given her was ruined by the large bloodstain that marred her left sleeve. The King was inconsolable, his usual tempered facade stripped away."This is why I forbade Sidon!" he bellowed. "The second he boarded that Beast, another attack!"Sidon had thankfully resurfaced with Vah Ruta in the Eastern Reservoir with the break of dawn. Being a Zora the dive had posed no risk to him, even if he had not sealed Vah Ruta beforehand; however the nurses of the Zoran infirmary were determined to put him through a medical examination regardless."Sidon assures us Vah Ruta is safe," Zelda told the King. "The attackers that were with him were a Hylian, and a Gerudo, and cannot breathe-""A Gerudo!?" the King shouted. The nobles of the court began to simmer with anger. They echoed his words, face twisted with anger."It's-it's true that the attacks were Gerudo led but-" Zelda began to protest, her words soon drowned out by the rage of the court. The nobles and retainers were in uproar, and the King had to bang his fist on the marble armrest of his throne to quieten them."This cannot go unpunished!" cried Muzu, the confidant of the King. "They attacked our sacred Divine Beast, the resting place of Princess Mipha, and they threatened the life of your heir twice!""No, wait-" Zelda tried to say, but she was drowned out again by the court's impassioned cheers of agreement."It is decided then. The Gerudo are not a foe that fight fair, nor are they one that I wish to engage," the King boomed, silencing the court. He looked down towards Zelda. "But I am reminded of your words Princess. There are choices we must make when we have no choice at all."The King took a deep breath, pausing to collect his words. "Muzu - collect ten of our finest warriors, and five members of this court. We will send an envoy to Gerudo Town, to have them answer for what they have done."No! No, no, no...Zelda could not speak. There was no point; she would not have been heard over the rambunctious cheering and shouts from the court. Link gave her a nudge, and they helplessly skulked away from the audience chamber.After returning to their beds at the inn, Zelda carefully unwrapped her sleeve where her shoulder had been pierced. She scowled at the ruined fabric. Without the adrenaline from the fighting--both with the Gerudo and the Zora--the pain was back full force. The ache from the wound, and from her sorrows, and from her failure; all at once, it overwhelmed her. What was it that Impa had said? United, a kingdom can rebuild. Torn apart, and it will become nothing. Now not only did the Zora distrust her, they were about to go to war against the Gerudo! So wrapped up in her grief, she hadn't noticed Link move to sit by her side, nor did she noticed him raise his hands to her injured shoulder. It was only when she felt the pleasant warmth emanating from her injury that she turned to see him. A gentle light was radiating from Link's hands, and Zelda saw the wound begin to heal in full.She lowered her eyes and steadied her thoughts, evening out her breaths. Like clouds, she thought, feeling the pain recede."It's a shame that power doesn't also mend fabric," she mused."Mm, very inconvenient," Link said dryly. He held her arm steady, his concentration never leaving the light between his hands.Zelda sighed; the meditation would not help her now. "What are we going to do?" she lamented. "I suppose you still think we should go back to Kakariko."Link opened his mouth to speak, but hesitated. Zelda looked down and saw that her arm was almost healed."I was wrong," he eventually admitted. “About you.”"What do you mean?" Zelda pressed. His voice was different today, gently warm like a woollen winter coat."I guess I overreacted, in Akkala. In Vah Ruta, saw you hold your own. And you saved me from that Gerudo.""Gerudo man," Zelda added. Link's eyes went wide in acknowledgement. I know, they said, but it was a conversation for later."Well, I'm not invulnerable, am I? And I can be plenty reckless," Zelda teased, a hint of vitriol in her voice. "I've learned that much.""Well I'm sorry for what I said," he said, his eyes fixed once more on her shoulder. "I’m sorry for not saying so sooner.""I’m sorry too,” Zelda conceded. “For the same reasons.”A moment of uncomfortable silence passed between them, and Zelda heard Link sigh. He spoke slowly, the words measured and considered. Rehearsed.“I remembered something, from before,” he said. “I was six when my father began teaching me to fight, and ten when I was sent to Otra to learn properly. Then I was made a Knight, and then a Champion. I don’t… know anything else.”He fell silent again, seemingly waiting for her to speak. This was it, Zelda realised, the chance to salvage what remained. Not of Hyrule this time, but of them.“Perhaps, we can try a new arrangement,” she offered.This caught his attention, and he paused his work.“Perhaps we can look out for each other, instead of the burden falling entirely on one.”Link exhaled, his whole body seemed to relax. “I’d like that.”The healing was soon complete, and Zelda paused to run a finger across the darkened scar. Outside the inn, the Domain was still abuzz with activity; King Dorephan's decree had set every Zora-noble or common-gossiping and speculating on who would be chosen to face the Gerudo."We've got to outpace that envoy," Link said as he rose from the bed.The suggestion gave Zelda a start. "Are you sure?""The Gerudo didn't do this. They couldn't have. We need to warn them," Link explained. He looked out towards the plaza and the Zora that were milling about."No, I mean — you would be okay with us, with me, travelling into the desert? It’s dangerous, more so than any place we’ve been.”Link shrugged, and spoke with a twinkle in his eye. "We’re both fighters, aren’t we? Out there is where we should be.”Zelda could barely contain herself, up on her feet right away. She re-tied her robe, suddenly not caring that it was damaged. It would be mended in time."Then let's not waste a moment," she said, hooking her Sheikah Slate to her hip and beginning to bundle up her possessions. "To the desert?"Link grinned, and he gave her a short, resolute nod. "To the desert," he said.
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
Lady Riju,
I have gone into Central Hyrule to investigate the disappearance of one of our guards. Teake will assume my position and will meet you in your throne room in the morning. It was better to leave under the cover of dark, and better that I told as few people as possible. I apologise for this, my lady.
Since Link's victory over Calamity Ganon with the aid of Lady Urbosa, the security of the Gerudo has become paramount. I know that the disappearance of a lone guard seems insignificant, but I have reasons for my haste which I will share when I return. This guard who has disappeared - she has only returned to Gerudo Town half a year past. I fear her actions may cause harm not only to Gerudo, but all of Hyrule.
Do not trouble yourself with my well-being, or my investigation. Focus on your people, and on bolstering their strength. The Calamity may be over, but there will always be battles to fight. We are strongest when we work together – when we work as one.
Buliara
Just like the rains, Zelda's tears had begun to let up. For one hundred years she had been trapped within that foul sanctum in the castle, gazing upon the destruction and decay that was once her home. During that time she'd felt her heart cool from molten to hard and brittle stone, like obsidian – opaque, unflinching, and like to shatter at any moment. The attack on Vah Ruta and the now firm scar on Zelda’s left arm was testament to her own vulnerability that she had previously denied, but it was a portent of something else too: disunity still loomed in Hyrule, and not all monsters could be simply sealed away.The Sacred Grounds in Central Hyrule were where Zelda and Link had made their current camp, with the decayed Guardians that littered the ancient site as their cover. The enormous husks and wide cylindrical heads were large enough to camp behind, and tall enough to serve as suitable lookouts. Zelda suspected that it was superstition, not fear, that kept curious wanderers and travellers away from this site. In the days before the Calamity, the Royal Family had once venerated these Sacred Grounds, and soon after that the Royal Family were all killed.Well, not all of us, Zelda thought from her post atop a partially interred Guardian. The edge of the Sacred Grounds was barely half a mile from the entrance to Castle Town, and so she and Link had been alternating shifts watching the traffic to and from the ruined site.A few days prior, Zelda and Link had stolen away from Zora's Domain under the cover of a new moon. They slipped out of the city among the throng of Zora in the Central Plaza, their clothes still a little waterlogged, and their packs hastily thrown together. The Zora would not sleep that night, and in the morning their envoy of warriors and diplomats would descend down Zora's River towards the desert in the southwest. It had been Link’s idea – he’d guessed that two could travel faster than ten, which would afford them a head start as well as extra time. With that in mind, they decided to make a short detour through Hyrule Field to determine the status of Hyrule Castle. And so, for a whole morning now, Zelda had surveyed Hyrule Castle from a distance, using the Sheikah Slate scope to gather what intel she could. What little she could lead to a shocking revelation: Hyrule Castle was now inhabited.A tap on her ankle broke her reverie."See anything?" Link asked.He was sitting cross-legged at the bottom of the Guardian husk, taking a whetstone to one of his fishing spears. Zelda peered through the scope once more and focused. All was silent save the gentle rushing of water through the stream that bordered the Sacred Grounds, and the rhythmic schhtk schhtk from Link's whetstone against the steel of the spearhead."More of the same," Zelda said. "Mostly empty, but every now and then, a Hylian on the walls. No one travelling through the main gates, but some Rito coming and going from the north. A few in Yiga garb, at least that’s what I think it is. And…all with those blasted blue neckerchiefs.""Any Gerudo?" Link asked."I haven't seen him, if that's what you're asking. I doubt that Gerudo would have made it back here, if he even could. Most likely both those bandits drowned inside Vah Ruta.”She heard Link grumble. When she looked down he was rubbing the sore spot on his ribs where the Gerudo man had thumped him with the hilt of his feathered Rito sword. Zelda had suggested he just heal himself with Mipha's power, but Link had shrugged it off, telling her he couldn’t learn from a blow he couldn’t feel.Maybe you shouldn’t have healed me, Zelda thought, before deciding to just be grateful that he had. Even just touching the smooth scar from where that demon woman Milagre had stabbed her sent a shudder of sympathetic pain through her arm."If you see anything," Link muttered. In his hands he now held the blue neckerchief they had looted from the Yiga woman that they had confronted on their way to Kakariko, and was using it to wipe the point of the fishing spear clean, in a manner that was slightly more aggravated than normal."I'll let you know as soon as I see him," Zelda said. “You’ll get your rematch.”Link just grunted in agreement.They fell into a comfortable silence, and Zelda returned to her work; she had been trying to do a rough count of the bandits' numbers using the Sheikah Slate, with minimal success. It was hard to tell them apart from a distance, especially since so many wore Yiga masks…But Zelda knew one thing was clear – from the way their numbers were made up of a mishmash of Gerudo, Yiga, and rabble all in that familiar blue scarf – there was a new regime come for Hyrule after all, and it had taken the Castle.Well, if Hyrule Castle had been taken, it could be taken back. Such cold pragmatism was all Zelda could muster against the loss of her home. I am obsidian, she thought to herself again. Brittle, but sharp, and deadly when ready. If she would ever be ready.Some time later, there was another tap on her ankle, this time with a small frying pan. "You want lunch?" Link had stood, and was looking up at her from the base of the Guardian husk, his travel fry pan in hand."If you're making," Zelda said."Anything you want?""Whatever you'd prefer.”Link turned back towards their campfire, raising his hand to give a thumbs' up as he went. Zelda smiled in spite of herself, and returned her attention to the Sheikah Slate.Lately, Zelda felt she could begin to parse their travels together into something concrete; something recognisable as camaraderie or even a partnership. Since the attack on Vah Ruta, something had changed between herself and Link. Perhaps a mutual understanding, or a deeper trust that wasn't there before. They still bickered, a little; Link pushing his horse too hard, or Zelda wandering too far from camp at dusk. Zelda had discovered - or perhaps rediscovered - that Link was incredibly touchy about his food. She had found that he kept a small, secret bag of honeycomb, wildberry, and apples among his things; when she been unable to stop herself from taking a handful of each without asking first, he had been so annoyed that he sulked around their camp for almost a whole afternoon. It didn't help that she found his apparent dedication to snacks absolutely hilarious, stifling chortles of laughter the entire time he'd chided her.But their arguments never lasted long, and Zelda made amends for her transgression with an apology and by using her powers to harvest a dozen apples and an entire beehive to give to Link. They cooked up a feast of honey-simmered apples that night, giggling like children as they tried to wrangle the honey from the empty hive. By the time she retired, fingers still sticky and redolent from the meal, Zelda was convinced that she and Link were no longer just two souls bound by circumstance; they were friends, for whatever that was worth.Once, in the distant past, you wanted more, didn’t you? Zelda had no answer for her thoughts. It didn't matter now. Time and sleep and ruin had stolen their past from them. Her focus had to be on rebuilding Hyrule. Her focus had to be on rebuilding herself.Unable to concentrate, Zelda jumped down from the Guardian husk and went to fish her Sheikah robe from one of the nearby shallow pools of water that encircled the ancient stone and pillars of the Grounds. The bloodstain left on the robe had finally begun to fade after repeated washes, though the white wool seemed to cling to the grizzly reddish-brown blotch. Zelda took the robe and spread it delicately over the stone of the Grounds so that it could dry in the sun, apologising mentally to the sweet Sheikah girl who had given it to her. As soon as they made it to Gerudo, she’d have the blouse repaired, or find enough needle and thread to do it herself.Sheltered by the evergreens, Zelda and link ate a quick lunch of simmered fruit and scrambled eggs. Once they were done, Zelda decided there was no point lingering. Although there were no signs of the Zora envoy on the horizon, they needed to keep moving in order to reach Gerudo Town with enough time to warn Chief Riju. They finished breaking down camp just as the afternoon began to wane to evening, amber streaks of sunlight filtering through the leaves. Pulling on Paya's now-dry robe, Zelda mounted her horse as Link finished sorting out his pack; he had bottled no less than four jars of leftover honey from the beehive, and was gingerly trying to squeeze them into his already full food pouch. Eyes fixed on the aging stone around them, Zelda stepped her horse onto the marble platform at the centre of the Sacred Grounds. She looked down upon the engraving at its centre - the royal family crest, and three unrecognisable symbols within each triangle. Could this too be repaired?And then, at the very edges of her perception, she heard sounds originating from the direction of the castle - a trio of voices, the soft thudding of hooves upon the grass, and the neighs of horses being pulled to a halt. Zelda spun around to see three figures advancing towards them from the north: two riders and a green-feathered Rito following on foot, a red and gold Falcon bow strapped to his back. She heard more hoofbeats, this time from Link's horse as he joined her on the platform. Zelda did not break her gaze from the advancing trio, but in her peripheral vision she saw Link slowly reach for his bow.She did not recognise the Rito, nor the plain Hylian man astride his dappled mount - though she did recognise the blue neckerchiefs they wore, tied tight like a hangman's noose. But the rider leading the trio sent a bolt of fear arcing down her spine. Long black hair peeked out from her dark hood, framing a familiar face. She was no less intimidating than before, as was the long spear that she carried, its tip glinting brilliantly in the light of the afternoon sun. When she saw Zelda, the corners of her mouth twitched into a mocking smile."Evening, little mage," the woman named Milagre said, and then she bowed her head towards Link. "And to you, knight."You should be dead, Zelda wanted to say, but the words were stuck in her throat. The phantom pain was in her shoulder again, and the terrible fear - the pounding of her heart and memories of the desperate, flailing attempts to defend herself against that woman - had seized her, and frozen her tongue. It felt as though all her muscles had tensed at once. Neither she nor the riders moved. They were suspended between action and reaction; between strangers and rivals; between assailants and assailed.Milagre turned to the Rito. "This is where you saw the smoke?""Last evening past, and this afternoon as well," the Rito replied, motioning towards the pile of glowing embers on the west side of the camp. Zelda scolded herself internally for forgetting about their fire. Her mind was racing; disjointed thoughts clouding her mind as she leapt between planning an escape and planning an attack. Beside her Link was posed at the ready, one hand on his reins, the other gripping his proud Rito bow. His face was steeled and stoic, but Zelda caught a familiar gleam in his eye. Assessing the situation, weighing his options; the knight once again.The Hylian man, astride next to Milagre, had been squinting at them intently, his brown eyes sizing them up until a glimmer of recognition passed across his face."Mila!” He cried. “That's him, the Champion!""It is, so very observant," Milagre grinned. Her eyes moved to the Sheikah Slate at Zelda's belt. "And the magical slate as well.""What do you want with it!?" Zelda demanded. Her horse sensed her fear, and began to stomp nervously. Milagre ignored her."Cinna wants the boy, and the Slate," she told her companions. "Kill the girl if you must."They all moved at once. The Rito drew his bow, but Link was faster. He sent a fizzling, bulbous arrow into the ground between themselves and the trio, and Zelda's horse reared at the sudden explosion"Run!" Link called to her.Together they kicked their horses into a gallop, and fled south, with Milagre and the Hylian man following closely behind. Behind her, Zelda heard the rush of air as the Rito took wing, a blur of colour crossing overhead. Then behind her was a pained cry from the Hylian man, and Zelda turned to see him topple from his saddle, one of Link's slender arrows embedded into his shoulder."Inglis!" Milagre shouted. She pulled up her horse by the Hylian man's side, but he waved her on."I'll be fine," he shouted, and pointed to the fleeing Link and Zelda. "After them!"Zelda returned her attention forward. Her horse weaved through the trees, but the low branches scraped and scratched at her clothes. Emerging onto the rolling plains of Hyrule Field, Zelda pressed her horse harder to speed up, Link following not too far behind. Overhead the Rito had soared ahead in an attempt to cut them off; he dove, drew his bow and fired at Zelda. She raised a barrier just in time, and the arrows splintered in front of her face. In retaliation she sent a blast of energy lancing through the sky, but her shot went wide as she tried to split her focus between her aim and the unsteady gait of her galloping horse.Link fired another arrow, this time towards the Rito. It flew low, and arced silently back towards the grass. "He's too far away!" Zelda yelled."Can’t let him close!" Link shot back, reaching for his quiver to draw another arrow. The second shot missed as well, disappearing into the amber sky. They thundered over the crest of a hill and below them a crude gravel road appeared, leading southwest to some ruins farther afield. Link had turned his attention back towards Milagre, whose strong chestnut horse was gaining on them. He nocked another arrow into his bow, and raised it to fire."Sharp right!" Zelda shouted as they neared the road, and Link pivoted as he picked up the reins to guide his horse through the turn. Reaching the road did not seem to help, as Milagre's faster horse continued to gain on them. The ruins were rushing forward to meet them, the road soon flanked on either side by tall trees. Zelda put her faith in her horse, and scanned through the trees for their Rito assailant. She saw a splash of green feathers against the amber sky, and raised her right hand. One, two, three lances of energy she sent towards the Rito. He dodged and dived, expertly evading all three shots before returning fire. Zelda flattened against her steed and heard the whistle of his arrows as they flew past. She cursed her lack of finesse, and squinted again through the trees."Keep going!" Link shouted at her. "He's pulling back!""What!?""Keep firing!"The road was winding and uneven, and Zelda could feel her horse struggling on the shifting gravel beneath her hooves. She spotted the green-feathered Rito now flying slightly behind them. Using what felt like the last of her strength, she fired two more surges of energy at him. The second beam connected and the Rito took the hit hard in the torso, dropping from the sky. He flapped his wings frantically like a hatchling as he fought to stay airborne. Link was leveling an arrow at Milagre, but could not get a precise read on their pursuer. They traded volleys of arrows back and forth along the twisting path, with more than one whistling past Zelda. The Rito had recovered, and now flew directly above Milagre. Beside Zelda, Link shouldered his bow, and closed his eyes."What are you doing!?" Zelda cried. Link’s face was taut, a deep scowl forming on his features. At first he didn't seem to hear her. Two more arrows soared past her horse. "Link!" she shouted again, and then his eyes snapped open. He turned and gave her the darkest look she had ever seen. A seething anger swam in his sapphire-blue eyes. No - it wasn't anger. It was fury.Behind them, Milagre had nocked another arrow to her own bow, string taut and preparing to fire.If Zelda had blinked, all that followed would have been lost to her. Link spun around in his saddle, and bringing his sword hand over his left shoulder, he snapped his fingers in the direction of their attackers. A barrage of lightning erupted behind them. It was followed closely by a deafening thunderclap and a shrill caw echoed through the field as the Rito plummeted from the sky. Zelda's mare spooked and nearly reared, but a swift kick urged her onward. Debris and dirt exploded on either side of the gravel road, and Zelda saw that Link's lightning surge had toppled half a dozen trees.Milagre's horse whinnied and reared, trapped behind the pile of ignited tree trunks that now blocked the narrow path. Their pursuer recovered and, wheeling her horse around, gave them one last lingering scowl before fleeing back towards the castle. Zelda gaped over her shoulder at the scene, her ears still ringing from the thunderclap.Link's voice pulled her out of her stupor, steady and stern. The knight as always. "Let's keep moving."They banked further south, following the rough gravel path until it gave way to packed dirt. Night fell quickly, stars popping out one by one against a vast and endless sky. Zelda felt her heart slowly return to a natural rhythm, and she fought to push the echoing flashes of their escape down into the recesses of her memory. Finally the cliff faces of the Gerudo Canyon loomed ahead, and exhausted, Zelda slumped forward in her saddle. Beside her, Link was calm as a still sea. If he was tired he did not show it."That was impressive," Zelda said breathlessly as they approached the canyon stables. She saw the corners of Link's mouth prick up in response - a gap in his armour, giving way to the soul, and the friend, that she knew was underneath."Lady Urbosa's trick," he replied."A deadly one," Zelda muttered, though hearing the Gerudo Champion's name brought a wave of nostalgic warmth. Urbosa was still looking out for them, in her own way. We'll need more tricks like that, she decided.They stabled their horses, and continued on to the sands beyond.Under the hot southern sun, and encircled by simmering lines of heat that rose up from the shifting sands of the Gerudo Desert, Kara Kara Bazaar was a welcome oasis - in every sense of the word. Link and Zelda had trekked through the eastern edges of the desert by night, not content to stay long at the bordering Canyon Stable. It seemed that the travelers of Hyrule prefered to find their adventures where the grass could still grow, for the oasis's inn was nearly empty, and the merchants of the Bazaar descended upon them like coyotes to carrion."Little vai!" a Gerudo crone cawed from her stall. "Little voe! Meat for your empty stomachs! No better price this side of Gerudo Town!"And likely no other price. If other oasis towns had sprung up in the barrens of the desert since the Calamity, Zelda could not know, but made a mental note to find out. Peering towards the infinite southern horizon, she doubted that any had. What could hope to thrive in such a place besides the hardy and tradition-steeped Gerudo? Or the sandworms and Lizalfos that prowled through the dunes, waiting on some unfortunate soul to stray too far from the desert paths?Certainly not the Zora, Zelda thought, feeling a creeping anxiety clawing at the edges of her conscious. There was still no sign of the Zoran envoy, and Zelda was convinced they were still at least a day behind - a day that would allow herself and Link a small respite. Entering Gerudo Town would mean meeting with the Gerudo Chief, and assuming the role of the Princess once more. Zelda needed time before she could face that part of herself again.lShe spent her day of rest organising her belongings. Both her embroidered white undershirt and Sheikan robe had been mended; a tailor in the Bazaar had seen to that. She admonished Zelda about the bloodstains though, offering to try to wash them out."If you're going to fight, girl, at least learn to clean your armour," the old Gerudo crone had chided, clicking her tongue and shaking her head. 'Armour' was not how Zelda would have described her clothes. In truth, they were barely practical. When she was younger she had loved the gold trimmings of her royal blue short-blouse, and the intricate embroidery on her undershirt. Now it all seemed superfluous, and none of it had protected her from Milagre's spear. And even in the cool of Kara Kara Bazaar, the searing heat of the Gerudo Desert made her normal traveler's clothes too warm to wear. With that in mind, Zelda set out to find more suitable attire for the desert heat. Splurging nearly half of Link’s remaining rupees, she purchased from the tailor a lightweight cream singlet adorned at the neck with dangling sapphire-coloured gems, and donned it under her now well-worn royal short-blouse. A pair of Gerudo-made leather sandals finished off the outfit, as her old Hylian boots were too clunky for traversing the sands.The elderly Gerudo tailor looked her up and down once she had finished changing behind the screen in her stall. "Pretty little vai, aren't you?" she grinned through yellowed teeth. "You almost look like you belong here."Zelda politely laughed off the woman's comments, though she felt secretly elated at finally owning some new clothes. How long had it been? At least one hundred years, she thought dryly.Link too was struggling under the heat; he'd swapped out his familiar Hylian trousers for some patterned Gerudo slacks capped with a pair of golden sandals, and wore an ornate cobalt spaulder over his cream undershirt. And though his Gerudo garb was embedded with sapphires to ward off the heat, she found him chowing down on a small heap of equally cool hydromelons. He was sitting contentedly by the west edge of the oasis, and by the looks of it was tucking into his third melon.He seemed to startle when he saw her, pausing mid-bite before mumbling a muffled hello. She sat down beside him, removed her sandals, and dangled her feet in the oasis, feeling the bite of the chilly waters in her bones. Link handed her a slice of hydromelon, which she took gladly. Upon the red cliffs that bordered the horizon, the body of Divine Beast Vah Naboris towered above the desert. The morning sun was caught behind her, and her shadow stretched across the rocky cliffs and sloping sands.Another Beast that needs us, Zelda mused. She made a mental note to run remote diagnostics on Naboris, though she suspected that she would find the Gerudo's Divine Beast in a similar condition as Ruta; stable, still, and crawling with Malice. Zelda cringed at the thought of attempting the cleansing ritual again.She refocused her thoughts on Naboris, and to the Beast's original pilot. "It was lucky that you had Urbosa's power," she said. "That Rito was a strong flyer."Link hummed in agreement, taking another bite of hydromelon. Swallowing, he said, "Feels like I don't deserve them. The powers.""Don't say that. They were gifts.”Link shrugged. "They still aren't really mine.""Well, I'm grateful anyway. I know I wasn’t much help, back there. I try, with my powers. But I don't know how to use them. I feel like...like a child wielding a toy sword."Link put away the hydromelon hust he was holding and gazed out across the oasis waters, his face pensive with deliberation. After a few moments, he said, "We can work on that.""Pardon?"He scratched his chin; nonchalant, as though he'd not mind if she turned down his idea. "I remember some of Otra's shield drills. The dance of death, he called it," Link rubbed the sore spot on his ribs. "That Gerudo reminded me."Zelda wasn't sure how to react. She knew the prospect of honing her abilities was one she should take, but training with the Hero of Hyrule, training with Link...even the thought of it made her nervous. But she swallowed her trepidation; darkness loomed on the horizon of Hyrule once again, and there was no time for hesitation. “A good idea,” she said.The sun had risen high above the cliffs now, and the shadows of the Bazaar had shifted so that she and Link were sitting in the sun. Zelda felt beads of sweat form on her forehead. "I think we should head to Gerudo Town near evenfall. I remember it being cooler inside the city."Link shifted awkwardly where he sat. "I'll um… need to borrow the Slate, before we go.""What for?"He raised a hand to the back of his neck, his cheeks colouring. “I need to uh, dress properly.”Realising what he meant, Zelda brought a hand to her mouth to hide her grin."Right, how could I forget?” she giggled. Reaching down to her belt, Zelda retrieved the Sheikah Slate and held it out for him. “No need to be embarrassed. Silk suits you, Hero.” Link elbowed her arm in retaliation, a petulant smile on his face, and Zelda’s chuckle became a peal of laughter. By the end of it they were both in joyful tears as they traded barbs: Bet you think I should braid my hair too. Well it’s not as easy as all that, here I’ll show you. Yeah I’m sure you have practiced – hey, hands off! Let me try, someone has to tame this mane of yours!The sound of their voices floated across the near-empty Bazaar. The crones of the oasis turned from their stalls, and the travelers lifted their bowed heads to look for the source of the noise. An elderly Gerudo shook her head, and muttered to herself as she adjusted her goods."Honeymooners," she clicked her tongue. "They're all the same."
The next dawn found them at the gates of Gerudo Town; two Hylian Vai, one of whom wasn’t much of the a talker and the other brimming with excitement to be let in after a century away. Even so early the plaza was buzzing, the Gerudo and travellers taking full advantage of the morning’s cooler hours.
Merchants lined the long plaza street and were hocking their wares to any who passed. Under the palm trees that ran the length of the plaza, pairs of Gerudo stood gossiping, while others rested in the shade. Nearby, Gerudo children were splashing in tiled pools of water beneath the palms. There were Hylians too, and a Rito woman shopping for enchanted arrows, even a Goron among the gathered people of the plaza. Zelda felt her eyes glisten with tears to see it; she had forgotten, somehow, how at home she felt in this place.
Beyond, the palace apartments loomed, home to Chief Riju. Zelda knew little about the her, only that she was young – barely a teenager – but fearsome and brave. But their meeting would have to wait. Zelda wanted to enjoy the rest of their morning.
“Mother brought me here every chance she could,” Zelda told Link as they walked a loop of all the stalls. “The first hint of autumn and we would be off in the royal carriage for Gerudo. I remember I once asked her if Lady Urbosa our relative. I thought she and mother must be sisters, because why else would we visit so often? I suppose now I know that mother just wanted an escape. Even for a little while.”
Link didn’t say anything in response, and if he had any expression at all it was mostly hidden behind his Gerudo veil. But for a moment he paused, appraising her with what seemed like sympathetic eyes.
“I know what you’re going to ask. I have no intention of escaping myself, we still have so much work to do,” Zelda said. “Though a real holiday could be nice. Somewhere by the sea, like Lurelin.”
“Lurelin it is,” Link affirmed.
They had stopped outside a shop that Zelda didn’t recognise, and before Zelda could continue their conversation, a high and energetic call filled the air.
“Va’saaq! Fine wears of every kind at Starlight Memories Jewelery! Made with the best materials in Hyrule!”
OIt was a glamorous Gerudo woman, dressed tip to toe in intricate golden and green clothes and accessorised with precious gems of all colours. She positively sparkled in the bright desert light, and Zelda was immediately captivated.
The woman noticed them staring and laughed. “Come in, little vai! I have some earrings with your name on them!”
“M-me?” Zelda spluttered. “I couldn’t– we don’t even have many rupees and–”
“Wait a minute,” the Gerudo woman narrowed her eyes. “I remember you!”
The Gerudo woman laughed again. She strode over and held out a hand — to Link.
“You, mysterious vai! Link was it? Funny name. It’s me, Isha! I must thank you again. My shop thrives because of your generosity!” She shook his hand with vigour. “You must come see the new inventory. Your discount still applies of course, perhaps you’d like to purchase something for your friend, teehee.”
They followed the eager woman inside to what Zelda surmised was a jewellery store. “You helped open a shop?” she murmured.
“I gave her some flint I had lying around,” Link shrugged. “It didn’t take long, I swear.”
“No, it’s okay. I’m glad that you helped people.”
They stepped into the jewellers shop, which shone nearly as bright as Isha herself; circlets, earrings, bracelets, rings and belts in all colours and makes were on display. The store was already busy enough that it was a wonder Isha was trying to find more customers; at the counter, a Hylian traveller was haggling over a diamond circlet, while two Rito waited to pay for a pair of ruby rings, and in the far corner was a goron, carrying what looked like a spyglass and examining some of the goods up close.
Under his veil, Zelda sensed that Link was smiling. “I did,” he breathed. "I helped."
Isha was rummaging around behind one of the counters, but popped up briefly to address the Goron. “So what’ll it be Kairo, do we have a deal?”
“I gotta say I’m impressed!” said the goron. “I didn’t know my ore could sparkle like this.”
“Well look all you like, but I won’t let you leave Gerudo until we have a deal for regular supply. You bring me gems from Eldin, I can turn them into fine goods for you to sell on the road.”
The goron rubbed his chin. “I dunno. I wouldn’t really know how to sell this stuff… Let me think it over.”
Isha threw up her hands, and disappeared back behind the counter, reappeaing a few moments later with a small white box. “Here we go, special stock for my favourite vai.”
Approaching Link and Zelda, Isha held out the prized box with an excited grin, pushing it into Link’s hands. “Go on, open it. And if you don’t like them, they’ll go lovely with your friend’s eyes.”
Isha nodded towards Zelda, who could not help but blush.
Inside were two earrings of deep amber, cut with exquisite precision, their shape resembling that of autumn leaves. Zelda felt a strange energy radiating from them, as though the air around them was thicker somehow. Link picked one of the earrings up and held it to the light; flecks of orange hues caught a sunbeam and were scattered all around them.
“Look, I was going to charge, but these are on the house. Another thanks. I really couldn’t have done any of this without you,” Isha said. “Just don’t tell the other customers?
Link nodded, and carefully closed the box. “Anytime,” he said.
There was a crash behind them, and a gasp from the goron trader, who admittedly was a little too large for a store so full of delicate wares.
“Kairo!” Isha shouted, turning her full attention now back to the goron. “I said look, don’t touch!” And then she was hurrying back to the counter, stopping just long enough to wave to Link and Zelda as they departed.
“Sav’otta! Tell your friends about us! Soon there’ll be a shop like this in every town in Hyrule!”
Outside, the midday heat was rising, and even the shade of the palms and the cool waters of the plaza could not ward off the power of the desert sun. There was no delaying any longer. They stored in the amber earrings in the Sheikah Slate inventory, and headed towards the palace apartments to find Riju.
Chief Riju sat back in her tall throne, chin in her hand and sparkling emerald eyes skeptical as she assessed the two Hylian vai that stood before her. Zelda caught herself holding her breath again as she waited for the Gerudo child to voice her thoughts.Finally, she spoke. "The Princess of Hyrule died during the Calamity, or so I was told.""I have no proof beyond my word, I know that," Zelda admitted. Of course the Chief would not believe her. Riju was barely more than a girl; the Calamity wasn't history for her, it was legend. "And I know that isn't enough. I'm asking you to trust me."Riju's eyes moved back and forth between Link and Zelda, and then she looked towards her bodyguard, an imposing woman whose brown eyes darkened with suspicion."What do you think, Teake?" she asked."Chief Riju is right," the Gerudo bodyguard declared. Her hands gripped the hilt of a golden claymore that was almost as tall as Zelda, and her strong physical physique was almost as daunting as her glare. "The Champions of old are dead. The Royal Family is as well. This is known.""Link?" Riju said, leaning back in her throne. Behind his veil, Link's eyes went wide."Well, uh-" he began."My identity doesn't matter now," Zelda interrupted, her patience running thin. They had spotted the Zora envoy on the horizon just as they’d entered the palace. It would arrive in Gerudo Town within a few hours; this was their only chance to mitigate any political mishap. "If you trust Link then you can trust me. And you need to listen to what we have to say."Lady Riju sat patiently as Zelda explained their escapades in full; starting with Sidon's injury, and then the Yiga woman near Lanayru Wetlands, and then finally the attack on Vah Ruta and the King's decree to send an envoy into the desert."They think that you did this. To steal their Divine Beast and take it for your own," Zelda warned.Riju's glare was as intimidating and sharp as Teake's claymore. "And what do you think?"Link and Zelda exchanged a nervous look. It was Zelda who spoke. "I know you may not believe it, but I knew Lady Urbosa,” she explained. "And I know from her that your people would not do this. I believe that.""Of course we would not!" Teake growled, tapping her claymore impatiently against the colourful tiles of the throne room. "What use do the Gerudo have with that Beast?""Well, water," Zelda said plainly. "In the right hands Vah Ruta could flood all of Hyrule.""We have water!” Teake fumed. “This is nothing more than a power play. Clearly you can see this Riju?” She turned to the little chief.Riju's face was unmoving, though her eyes were shadowed. There was a keenness in them not typical of a girl her age, though Zelda detected a hint of doubt on the young Gerudo's features. “I suppose the Zora could be seizing an opportunity. Their Divine Beast is under attack, so perhaps they want to make sure there are none others in the world to threaten theirs - starting with our Naboris.”“Well, no, they would never–” Zelda began. Her heart was racing; it was happening again. Her words being misunderstood, the worst being assumed by those she was advising.“The Zora sent a letter, you know,” Riju said. “They spoke of their pilot, Prince Sidon. Was that your doing, Princess?” The little chief’s eyes moved to the Sheikah Slate at Zelda’s belt.“Yes, but, I intended to help you find your own pilot, if you would like. I think it would be wise. The Zora would have no advantage, and none need fear for their Divine Beast!”The young Gerudo seemed to heed her words, nodding deeply, but Teake slammed her claymore against the tiles yet again. "The Chief does not need advice from a commoner. Friend to Link though you may be, the Gerudo can handle this threat just fine.""No, I… Of course," Zelda inclined her head respectfully, ignoring the surge of indignant fury she felt.“Thank you for your warning,” Lady Riju said. “I wish now to speak with my advisors, in peace.”Her meaning clear, Zelda and Link departed the palace apartments.They waited atop the walls of Gerudo Town for the rest of the afternoon, watching the Zora envoy approach. As expected, they reached the entrance of Gerudo Town by nightfall. Five warriors wielding silver spears and five diplomats wielding silver quills had crossed Hyrule to Gerudo Town. Lady Riju, her guard Teake, and a retinue of Gerudo guards lined the gates of the city, heads held high and weapons held close as the envoy approached. Link and Zelda moved to the Daqo Chisay Shrine on the northeast corner of the city walls to watch the inevitable meeting.Hopefully they won't kill each other on sight, she tried to reassure herself, though she wasn't sure.Among the warriors Zelda recognised a sinewy grey-scaled Zora. It was Rilla, the woman who had fought beside them at Vah Ruta. Was it political savvy or misjudgement to send someone so affected by the attacks? Would it serve to garner sympathy from the Gerudo, or inflame tensions between them? She tried to remember her meager political education, racking her brain for whatever lessons she had been taught on effective communication and efficient negotiation. Perhaps Link wasn't the only amnesiac between the two of them, she realised. That or she had never paid attention to her studies, as was becoming clear...The diplomats of the Zora entourage were carrying woven canopies to shield from the sun, and the group was lead by a female, cerulean-scaled Zora who was also familiar to Zelda. Her once-simple attendant's jewels had been updated to ornate, silvery finery, and she walked with a measured peacefulness that was graceful even for a Zora. Approaching the gates, the Zora planted their canopies in the hot sand. Zelda came upon the twin realisations that the Zora all wore leather sandals like hers, and that she had never seen Zora in shoes before.The cerulean-scaled Zora approached Lady Riju's retinue, and gave a shallow bow, before extending her long-fingered hands forwards. "Lady...Riju, I am told. My name is Larella; I am an attendant to King Dorephan, and a diplomat of the Zora."You've been promoted, Zelda thought wryly as she watched the exchange, remembering the harsh words and sugary sweet smiles of Lady Larella. The young Gerudo did not take the ambassador's hands into her own. "Yes. Well met," she said, her tone cool enough to temper the desert heat."You were told of our arrival?" Larella asked sweetly, a sharp smile never leaving her face.Riju nodded in assent, but did not give away the two Hylians that stood watching from the shrine's shadow. "The Gerudo travel across all of Hyrule. We are not as isolated as we appear.""Then do you know why we have come?"Zelda felt her guts turning over, sweat trickling down her brow. The day's heat was still radiating from the sands, clinging to her skin and adding to her already overwhelming discomfort.Riju looked towards her advisors. The trio of women each carried a golden spear just as the guards did, and were only distinguishable by the colour of their clothes; their garb was a stunning white and grey, where the guards wore soft pinks and navy blue. The women nodded in unison, with one adding, "It is for the best, Lady Riju."The Chief turned back towards Larella, her long braids shifting in the gentle evening breeze."We have," she told the ambassador. "And for your accusations against us, we reject your envoy. You will not be entering our city."A stunned silence swept through the Zoras. For a long moment even Ambassador Larella - with her winning smiles and polite round eyes - gaped blankly down at the young Gerudo Chief. Zelda watched in disbelief. Lady Riju would have shocked the Zora less if she had slapped Ambassador Larella across the face.Riju was on the offensive. She was half the size of the Zora Ambassador, but in the waning sun her shadow was as long as any other. "Provide us proof that this incident was our design. Otherwise we have nothing to discuss.""With respect, Lady Riju," Larella said slowly, gathering her shock into words. "Three Gerudo warriors were seen at the docks of Rutala Dam. One of our number can testify to this."Teake took great offense to this. "And because they were Gerudo, Lady Riju alone must have sent them! Is that what you think!?""I never said that. But you cannot bar us - at least not the women!" Larella protested. “To condemn travellers to the heat of the desert would be unbecoming of a leader such as yourself. And to we Zora this place is deadly at best.”"Then I must wonder why you have come at all,” Riju countered. “While I have no wish to see your people harmed by the desert, but I cannot let you into my city while you accuse us of treachery."Larella's fists curled with outrage. "We will not leave. Not until we have answers."Riju was unaffected by Larella's protests. From where they stood, Zelda saw a fierceness in the young chief's face; where the Zora were proud, the Gerudo were ruthless, and it was clear that they were never destined to get along.Lady Riju spoke calmly, but without compassion or favour. "You have thrown baseless lies at my feet and demand that I bow to retrieve them – well, Ambassador Larella, I hope you are prepared to wait.”The Gerudo Chief nodded to her retinue, and in a single file they returned through the gates of Gerudo Town. Four guards remained, their spears tilted forward slightly. Their posture and display was clear: none shall enter.The Zora were dumbfounded, standing awkwardly at the city gates for a number of minutes after Riju departed, talking amongst themselves. Eventually they regrouped, and began the dismal trek back towards Kara Kara.Link was the first to speak. His brows were furrowed, his arms tightly crossed against his chest. "What now?" he asked."I don’t know," Zelda said, bowing her head. The desert heat had given way to a chill, and her shoulder throbbed with dull soreness. Above, the moon hung low on the horizon, the final dusk light painting it a grizzly red - an omen of vicious cycles, of violence, and altercations, as certain as the moonrise itself.Kara Kara Bazaar was in chaos. The desert oasis was never meant to be more than a watering hole for weary travelers; the inn had no more than four beds spare at any time, space was limited, and the weathered rocks that bordered the Bazaar did little to ward the desert winds. The Bazaar was simply not capable of harboring the ten bedraggled and irritable Zora that trudged in late that evening, though the locals pounced to take advantage of the situation. The price of a bed at the inn suddenly doubled, with the Gerudo crones of the Bazaar offering space in their stalls for double that again.Wounded in pride and vulnerable in spirit, the Zora had no choice but to accept, though the warriors among them wasted no time loudly proclaiming the cruelty of the Gerudo and their lack of moral finesse. And it took little time for the Gerudo to regret letting the Zora into their Bazaar at all. The envoy swiftly snapped up what meager food and goods the merchants could produce within the next couple of days, and even that was not enough. Hunger and heat pervaded the Bazaar during the Zoras' lockout from Gerudo Town, until every soul in Kara Kara slept and woke with the uneasy feeling they were likely to be jumped at any moment.Link was among the restless sleepers; there were too many eyes upon him, and all were suspicious. He had heard the Zora talking; that foolish Princess, warning the Gerudo of our arrival. Why is she meddling here, at the edge of the world? Zelda had not rested a moment, trying to mediate every disagreement between the Zora and the Gerudo at Kara Kara Bazaar with little success, and it was well into the night when she finally collapsed into her bedroll not far from his. Well that went well, he wanted to say, but figured it would do little to help. At least soon dawn would come, and he could spend the sun-lit hours at Zelda's side - stepping through their routines as though they were a dance. And he had been meaning to teach her the dance after all, and found an enjoyable distraction in planning out the lessons.Ambassador Larella in her silverite jewels made the trek alone to the gates of Gerudo Town the very next day after the envoy's arrival. Link and Zelda never discovered what transpired between the Zora woman and the city guards, but by the end of it, the Ambassador had been allowed to enter the city - so long as she was alone, unarmoured, and escorted by no less than two Gerudo guardswomen.The first talk was set for later in the afternoon that day, which Zelda had discovered from prying Larella for information. They did not ask Riju for permission to attend; it was as simple as following Larella into the Gerudo palace once she arrived some time after midday.“Are they your guests or mine?” Chief Riju asked when she saw Link and Zelda enter the throne room.“I’m sure they must be yours,” Larella said with a smile.“And here I thought you might have been colluding,” Riju said with a wry laugh. “Well, you two are here now, aren’t you?”“If it please you,” Zelda offered. “We can help mediate, if you wish.”“Wonderful,” Larella said flatly.“Yes, thank you, Princess,” Riju added.There was something in the way they were speaking that Link didn’t understand. He could feel the bitterness, but not hear it. It was uncomfortable to be around.The talks lasted several hours, but the discussions yielded nothing. The Gerudo Chief denied any involvement by her people; her arguments were echoed by Teake and punctuated with the clang of Teake's weapon against the tile. In a moment of quiet, while Riju was deliberating something privately wtih Teake, Link squinted at the imposing Gerudo guard."Where's Buliara?" he muttered under his breath."Pardon?" Zelda whispered. In a low voice, Link explained that on his first visit to Gerudo Town since waking, Teake had been the leader of the city guard. There was another woman appointed Riju's personal guard - Buliara."But she's not here," he whispered. “It’s just odd.”They turned their attention back to the talks. Larella was growing impatient of waiting for Riju to finish her secretive discussion with Teake."We would at least like an attempt at identifying the Gerudo assassins - if you truly had no involvement, surely you would like to be involved in finding the criminals," she said, her calm demeanor never wavering. "There were four - three female, and one male."“Male?” Riju’s brow raised skeptically.Teake thumped her claymore so hard against the tiles that Link thought for a moment that they would shatter. "There are no male Gerudo! These are lies!""Well, this one clearly was. He was seen by our witness," Larella argued. She cast a sidelong glance at Link and Zelda. "And by others who survived the attack."Riju turned her attention towards them. “Is it true?”“It is,” Zelda answered. “But Gerudo though he may have been, if he is not known to you then how could the Gerudo people be responsible?”“Responsibility is no longer the issue!” Larella said, frustration rising in her voice again. “All we ask is the aid of the Gerudo to find who tried to assail our Divine Beast!”“Indeed someone may have! So you can understand then, Ambassador, that I have my own Divine Beast to protect, from any any and all threats,” Riju said. “I have no wish to be made to give up Vah Naboris, just to appease the anxieties of others.”“We are not the threat to you!” Larella huffed, understanding the implication immediately.Riju leaned back in her throne, her head cocked lazily to the side and resting against her fist. “And yet here you are,” she sighed.After a moment’s consideration, she suddenly leaned forward, and waved a jeweled hand in the direction of the Zora ambassador, her bangles ringing like bells."This will be enough for today," she announced. "I'm afraid our response will be the same however; I did not send those warriors, and I do not wish to help you find who did. It is that simple."Larella curtseyed as Riju and her bodyguards exited the throne room. Once they were alone, her eyes fixed on the two Hylians who remained in the room."Curious to find you here, Princess, Champion," she sniffed as she approached. "Your presence is almost a bad omen for my people, it seems.""And here I was about to praise your tact in the discussions with Lady Riju, Ambassador," Zelda returned.The corners of Ambassador Larella's mouth were raised, though her eyes remained cold. "Curious indeed. Riju was kind not to name you as her informant.""She needed to be warned," Link cut in. Right? That’s what Zelda had said.Ambassador Larella sighed, crossing her slender arms below her chest. "Yes, and warned she was, by two Hylians with no understanding of the situation.""We do understand!" Zelda said. "We were there, as you pointed out!""Do you understand? Your warning ruined any chance of a civil discussion. The Gerudo are on the defensive; even if they had information, they will never share it now. I have to wonder where exactly they got the idea that we would want to harm their Divine Beast?""That’s not what I meant to tell them.""As I thought." The Ambassador stormed out of the throne room, her jewels clinking as she disappeared into the crowded Gerudo plaza.This familiar dance - meetings and talks between Riju and Larella - continued for three days without any progress.The Gerudo Chief and the Zora Ambassador dominated the talk but Zelda managed to get words in regardless; she recounted the tale of the attack on Vah Ruta, and described this mysterious male Gerudo and his band of warriors. Link was happy to slip back into his comfortable silence - though he found himself frustrated by the entire affair. Hyrule Castle was besieged by bandits and Yiga, and they were stuck in the desert listening to a petty squabble of who did what and who sent who. Zelda had brushed off his idea to broach the subject of Hyrule Castle with the Gerudo when he raised it one morning over breakfast."They won't believe us. Well, perhaps they would believe you," she had said, a bitterness laden in her words. "And in any case our only proof is a handful of neckerchiefs and the word of a dead Yiga woman that these bandits have formed themselves into something more. We don't even know if they truly have taken the Castle - not that the Zora or Gerudo have reason to care about a ruin."Link ground his teeth as he listened, but caught himself. “Dunno if I trust either of them,” he’d said."I don't know if Riju is being completely truthful. I asked her about Buliara, you know. She told me the woman was on holiday! It's almost as though...as though she was withholding something. Something that could implicate them."“You think so?”“I do. What other explanation is there?”Link had nodded in full agreement; politics was not the kind of fight he was well-versed in, and so he trusted Zelda's judgement. It was admirable, really, how dedicated she was to this. They had dined with Riju twice since arriving in Gerudo Town, and in that time Zelda quizzed the young chief about the Gerudo people: how they had changed since the Calamity, if they had changed; who Riju was, and why she had been made Chief at such a young age; and the state of the Yiga, though curiously there was little to be said about them.“Did you really know Lady Urbosa? My grandmother was her niece, they told me,” Riju had said, as they sat on the terrace of her private rooms after dinner, overlooking the sand seal training yard.“We did, I swear it,” Zelda had said. “Lady Urbosa would be proud of you.”Riju nodded, and from the glistening of tears in her eyes Link guessed she finally believed them.“Is there anything you’d like to know about her?” he asked, not that he himself could answer much.Riju had considered this for a time. “I only wish I could ask her for advice. I’m only a child, there’s so much about the world that I don’t understand yet.”“Yeah, same here,” Link said sympathetically, and at least Riju laughed at that.Still, Link knew, despite his lack of political expertise, that the proud Zora and stubborn Gerudo would eventually have to budge under their own mutual pressure. They couldn't stay locked in this limbo forever.They had to, soon, or he feared he would lose his marbles. Before he and Zelda walked into the desert, he'd felt like maybe he was starting to move forward. Build something new out of the scraps of memory and feeling that he held. The familiar weight of his crossbow at his belt was enough to make him sure of it. When Zelda offered to look out for him as he did her, suddenly things seemed freer. In the face of adversity, it was easy to slip into silence, to focus on being the knight. But there was a curiosity for a life with more to it, with different purpose, with friends… He knew he wanted something, but not what.And now his patience was beginning to wane yet again, and a growing sense of listlessness had begun to creep into his psyche. There seemed to be no break on the horizon, no welcome shore at the end of the sea. If it wasn’t the mysterious Yiga assassins, it was the Gerudo bandits, and now it was the preening Zora ambassadors. As Link was learning, even fighters long for peace.Not content to sit on her hands while she tried to think of a solution to break the stalemate, Zelda accepted Link's offer of sparring lessons and he was glad for it. Maybe a few hours hitting something with a stick would be a welcome diversion, if a bit of a novel one...Still dressed in his Gerudo vai outfit, Link told her to meet him atop the city's walls. The walls served a double purpose: they also acted as water channels, distributing the cool, clean water from the high spring that Gerudo Town was built around. Standing atop the walls, she and Link were ankle deep in the clear waters."I don't understand - we'll be practising up here?" Zelda asked him on the evening of their second day in Gerudo Town."Certainly will," Link answered, throwing her a long training spear. She caught it clumsily, almost tripping as she splashed through the water."But, the water-""Keeps your footing measured. We'll move onto the wall's edge when you're ready.""That's an eight foot drop!""Then don't fall."Zelda was incensed. "Are you insane?"Link shrugged. Who knows? Shifting his weight forward, he brought his training spear to bear.They started with simple sparring drills; two steps backwards, two steps forward, attack, block, repeat. Link explained that having something tactile to hold would help her learn the steps, judge her own movements, hear the song, as he called it. They moved slowly at first, the waters pulling at Zelda's feet, and her untrained eyes struggling to react to Link's broad swings and stabs. But gradually, over the course of the evening, her reflexes became keener, her movements faster. The next night they advanced to incorporating Zelda's magic; each block with her spear would be accompanied by a small barrier of light, and by the third evening of their practice, Link told her to forego the spear entirely. She would rely on her magic alone from then onwards. Stepping through the same drills, he had her parrying stabs and swings from all directions - and by the fourth evening, she felt she could glide through the channel waters."Don't drop your shield," he instructed on what would be their last evening of practice. The tip of his blunted training spear had glanced off Zelda's forearm as she misjudged his advance. "Drop your shield and-""I know, I know, forfeit your life," Zelda said through gritted teeth, the sting throbbing along her arm as she readjusted her footing. "It's not exactly easy to maintain.""Focus on your timing then." He shifted his weight to his right foot, spinning the spear through a horizontal slice. Zelda leapt backwards, dodging the strike. Two steps forward, two steps back. Link spun the spear between his hands. He arced the spear towards her again, across her left shoulder, and then the right, and she blocked both attacks. Unflinching, he stepped through another thrust. Zelda parried, surging forward through the water. The spear rebounded off the sheet of golden light. Link stumbled, and slipped backwards, the waters splashing around him as he landed heavily on the tiles of the channel.Zelda let her barrier fall, and held a hand out to him. "Impressive," he grinned up at her."You were going easy on me," Zelda shrugged as she helped him stand. He furrowed his brows, offended at the accusation. Zelda rolled her eyes, and motioned to the Master Sword at his back. He wore it almost constantly now. "I know how you fight."They clambered down from the high walls, landing in the now-quiet plaza. A few merchants still tended their stalls, and a handful of Gerudo women wandered through the bazaar, slightly drunk and cackling amongst themselves at gossip and jokes alike."We'll start on the wall's edge tomorrow," Link told her before they departed Gerudo Town.Zelda still was not sold on the idea. "Are you certain? If I fall and hurt myself, I'll be blaming you, I hope you know.""You won't fall," Link told her. "I won't let you."He had let a little more fondness through than intended, but the smile she gave in return had a warmth to rival that of the desert sands, and Link was satisfied that she had been reassured.He rose before dawn on the seventh day of their stay in Gerudo Desert. Food was still scarce in the Bazaar, so Link slipped his golden sandals on and walked into the desert to hunt some sand sparrows for his breakfast. He was crouched low among the sparse desert plants for cover, eyes focused on a trio of oblivious sparrows half nestled in the sand. Un-shouldering his Great Eagle bow and drawing back an arrow, he silently paid his respects to the Rito Champion who once wielded it. Smug prat, he added mentally, though he realised his disdain for Revali was now gone - tempered by time. All that was left was loss. Link lined up his shot, gaze centering on the small birds.A blotch of grey and blue caught his eye, and Link snapped his gaze to the side to see a pair of Zora warriors stalking through the desert - no more than a hundred feet away. Observing the spears in their hands, Link guessed they had the same idea as he did. Unfortunately, their presence alerted his prey, and the sand sparrows zipped away. Link loosed his arrow, but the birds were gone. He puffed his cheeks in frustration, and turned back towards the Zoras.Maybe it was the lack of sleep, or the low light, or the distracting rumbling of his stomach - Link did not react quickly enough to prevent the tragedy that then unfolded before his eyes. A moment too late, he spotted the spiny contours of a partially embedded and well-camouflaged electric Lizalfos less than ten feet from the Zora warriors. He was on his feet in an instant, running towards them, shouting something though he didn’t know what. The Lizalfos exploded out of the sand with a screech, a menacing jagged boomerang clutched in one of its bony claws. There was an explosion of electrical energy that burst from its shining horn, and though the blue-scaled Zora managed to leap away, Link and the grey-scaled Zora did not.He was thrown painfully backwards, static shock arcing through him, lacerating and burning his skin, and he landed hard against rough sand. But the pain in his body was nothing next to the terror he felt when he heard the Zoras scream. Link recovered just in time to see the terrible scene; the grey Zora seized and writhed, not even able to scream, electricity snaking its way through her slender body and long limbs, until she suddenly fell away from the Lizalfos, tumbling limply through the sand. The other Zora wailed, but stood firm, brandishing his silver spear defensively. However, the shifting sand slid underneath his sandaled feet, and unaccustomed to fighting on the loose grit, he floundered. Link bolted towards them, drawing and releasing an arrow before he even registered his own movements, and watched as it caught the Lizalfos through its unprotected throat.Link hoped against hope that he would not find what experience taught him would be there. The blue-scaled Zora was already hunched in the sand, distraught over the body of the other warrior. Link fell to his knees at their side, but hesitated helplessly; there was nothing more that he could do.Her grey eyes were open still, and though her expression was clouded, Link was struck by the openness of her features. She was young. Too young. With horror, Link realised that he recognised her. She had fought at his side on Rutala Dam. She had been nimble, and ferocious with a spear."Rilla," he whispered, almost flinching at his own voice. The dread twisted his guts and sent a ominous shiver down his spine; it felt like a premonition, like an omen. Fighting back his own grief, he solemnly closed the young woman's eyes, and helped her companion carry her back to the Bazaar.If there was upheaval in Gerudo Desert before, it was unmatched by the panic and paranoia that gripped Kara Kara once the sun fully rose. The warriors and diplomats mourned over Rilla's body as she was carried into the Bazaar, and before long there were those among them crying for retribution. Rilla would not have died if she had been safe within Gerudo Town, they claimed. The Zoras' endeavor for diplomacy had been met with no attempt at hospitality; though the Gerudo may deny a role in the attack on Vah Ruta, they were implicit in the death of Rilla.Link had pushed his way desperately through the crowd, shaking Zelda from her bed at the inn, and there was barely enough time to explain the incident. They ran east towards Gerudo Town and were met with a riot. The Zora envoy had swarmed the main gates of Gerudo Town, shouting and screaming for Lady Riju to face justice for Rilla's death. The Gerudo Chief was not cowed; she met them there, and her voice somehow rose above the rabble. To appease them, Riju had offered to permit the remaining female Zora into the town, but it was too late. Even Ambassador Larella could not calm the fury of her people and their anguish over the needless death of their youngest warrior.The Gerudo guards stood firm, their spears and shields angled forward - a phalanx against any who would besiege their city - and the Zora flashed their own silver spears, a silent threat ready to explode into violence. Link and Zelda helplessly, unable to approach the agitated crowd.Link was not sure who moved first. One of the spears caught the sun as either a Zora or a Gerudo (or perhaps both) suddenly shifted forward, and the fighting began.The shouts erupted into the morning air, Ambassador Larella and her diplomats frantically pleading for the four remaining warriors to stand down. Link drew his sword, mind racing as he tried to find a way to stop the fight before another catastrophe unfolded. He could not fight them, lest he add fuel to the fire; but he could not stop them alone. The eight spear-wielders - four Gerudo guards and four Zora warriors - hot-footed across the packed dirt at the city gates, trading blows and swipes, until there was a horrid shriek as one of the Gerudo guards took a spearhead to the side and crumpled into the sand.Suddenly, a sheet of shining light unfolded between the two parties - and at its centre was Zelda, having slipped away from Link's side unnoticed before throwing herself into the fray."Enough!" she yelled. "Please!"The warriors and guards were separated, unable to cross the divine barrier. Link caught Ambassador Larella's stunned glare as she tried to process the scene before her.The Gerudo guards tentatively lowered their spears. Two women broke off and gathered around the injured guard, assessing her injury. She was badly wounded, collapsed on the ground, but her eyes fluttered open as her fellows carried her away. One of Riju's advisors was escorting her away, and Link saw that the young Chief's determination had given way to despair.Ambassador Larella marched over to face her warriors, placing herself between them and the barrier. "You heard the Princess, fools. Stand down."Sullen and sour, the remaining warriors lowered their spears as well, grumbling indignantly among themselves. Zelda lowered her glowing hand, and tottered unsteadily. Link shot forward through the sand to meet her, wrapping an arm around her side as he steadied her. She was blinking at him slowly, clearly still dazed by the fighting and by her own sudden exertion. Eventually she shook herself free of his grip, and staggered over to the clustered Zora."Go back to Kara Kara," she told them. "Mourn your fallen warrior, and then you must decide, Ambassador Larella. Stay and risk more of your people, or go and put this behind you."The Ambassador was distraught, her eyes haunted and hollow. “You know as well as I the Zora will not do that.” She turned back to her party. With a single wave of her hand and a despondent flick of her fins, she urged them back out into the desert, heading for the shimmering oasis to the east.Link accompanied the Zora to escort the party safely back to the Bazaar, while Zelda remained to talk with Lady Riju. He was glad to at least be travelling during the cool hours of the morning, and he suspected Ambassador Larella too was grateful for the short respite from the stifling heat. She has enough on her shoulders now, he thought. Whatever peace he had been waiting for - that he hoped Zelda could help the Zora and the Gerudo find - seemed lost now. He raised his head to the sun and closed his eyes, trying to let the surge of disquiet pass, trying to reassure himself that there was still hope. Zelda will know what to do...right? But she wasn’t here, so he would have to do something. He had finally grown tired of standing to the side, as he had for an entire week."We should do more than just mourn," one of the warriors grumbled once they neared Kara Kara. His face was knotted and stern, his reddish scales dulled by the dust from the desert flats, though his breastplate and spear were shining from being over-polished. "We should get revenge. The Gerudo may as well have murdered Rilla, for the way they have treated us."Murmured assent from his fellow Zoras followed his statement, nods of agreement rippling through the group."You will do no such thing," Larella ordered, but Link detected a muted sneer on the warrior's face. The dissenter tossed his head dismissively, rolling his broad shoulders."Whatever you say, Ambassador," he cooed. "I'm just offering my aid - you have your words, and I have my spear.""That's enough, Rhett," Larella spat. “We have no more business here.”“So we are going home? Incredible. We’re just leaving these savages with to their Divine Beast? They could turn it on us at any time.”“I am aware, Rhett.”Link felt compelled to speak then. He tried to imagine himself Zelda’s voice - calm and collected. “Vah Naboris has no pilot,” he said. “She cannot harm you.”“Is that so?” Rhett smiled, but Larella seemed surprised. “Why not?” she said nervously.The warriors recommenced their whispered conversation among themselves. Link felt a tide of anxiety rising in his chest that he could not escape. I shouldn’t have said that, he realised after a time. He kept a close eye on the Zora warriors, determined to step in a the first sign of trouble, but as the party crested the final sloping dune before Kara Kara proper, they suddenly branched off, circling east around the Bazaar and racing towards the mountains at the edge of the desert."Hey! Hey!" Larella shouted after them. "Don’t do it! Listen to me! Stop!"The warriors paid her no mind, not even sparing a backward glance as they sped across the desert. Link traced their path, shading his eyes against the sun and squinting along the cliffs in the direction that the warriors were headed. Caught in the morning sun, her twin humps rising out of the mountain facade as though they were a part of the landscape itself, Link saw the warriors' destination. His mouth ran dry, and he staggered back in astonishment.They were heading for Vah Naboris.
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
The path towards the Master Sword had been set. Link would cross the Hylia River and head to Rauru Settlement, and then travel northwards to the Lost Woods. No one had offered him much in the way of advice; not the King, nor Chief Advisor Voswann, nor his father. On the day that the young knight had been chosen to seek the Sword, however, Voswann had grasped his shoulders with shaking hands, and tears in his eyes. “Go bravely child, we will honour you no matter what”. Link found himself unconvinced. My Father might not, he had thought.
Otra of Old Lurelin, the King's own Battlemaster, met him at the guards' quarters the day Link was due to depart. His was the only word that Link trusted now. The broad-chested Battlemaster greeted Link with a fatherly thump on the back.
"Are you afraid, boy?" he asked.
Link didn't know what to say. He shrugged and shifted his weight between his feet. Otra chuckled.
"There is no shame in it. Courage does not mean you cannot feel fear." The Battlemaster turned his gaze towards the north. "And in any case, getting that sword is the easy part."
Link rubbed the back of his neck. “Father says people have died trying.”
“You will not.”
"If you say so," Link said, smiling nervously up at his old teacher.
"You need not fear the Woods, or the Sword, Link," Otra's voice was suddenly sad. "Fear what comes after. That is the real challenge."
By the time Link and Zelda arrived at Vah Naboris, the Zora warriors were already approaching the base of Spectacle Rock where Naboris sat at rest, and would be less than an hour away from the Divine Beast. The gleam of their silverite armour had been dulled by the dust and dirt of Gerudo Desert, but there was nothing to temper their rage, or their foolishness."They'll get themselves all killed!" Zelda had cried when Link told her the news of the warriors' mad dash towards the Divine Beast. He had found her outside Riju's throne room, leaning against the warm sandstone walls of Gerudo Town, and guessed that little had come of her emergency talks with the Chief. But there was no time to discuss the altercation at the gates. To reach Naboris in time, the Hylians had no choice but to risk teleporting together via the Sheikah Slate - just as they had in Zora's Domain.That time, Sidon's life was on the line; we had no choice. Link thought. And with a sinking feeling he realised, as he and Zelda were whisked away by the tendrils of ancient light: we never have a choice.Together they materialised on Vah Naboris’ travel gate, but a moment later Zelda collapsed against the ancient stone, knocking her head violently as she fell. Link was at her side in an instant, helping her to her feet, hurriedly checking if she was hurt, but she was not. In fact, she barely reacted, blinking up at him.“Why…why are we here?” she murmured. She wavered, perhaps dizzy from the heat, so Link led her inside.They sat down against the curved side wall of Vah Naboris, and Link found a water skin, handing it to her to drink.“The Zora, remember?” he said.“Zora…?”Link’s stomach turned. “Tell me the last thing you remember.”She thought for a minute, taking a few sips of water, chest rising and falling as she took long, considered breaths. “I remember… we were at the Sacred Grounds.”Link hung his head. Not this, not now. He glowered at the Sheikah Slate that was hooked to Zelda’s belt. It had been long in the distant past now, but Link remembered Zelda telling him how little they knew about teleportation. Or maybe it was Purah, or Robbie, in another life. Sheikah Technology takes as much as it gives someone had told them.Link knelt down in front of Zelda, trying to steady his nervous breaths. “Zelda, we’ve been in Gerudo for over a week.”“A-a week!?” Horror grew across Zelda’s features as she began to understand. “The Slate… did we transport here together?”Link nodded wordlessly, unable to look her in the eye. To her credit, Zelda remained calm.“Well…perhaps it’s only temporary. You can fill me in. I’m sure nothing much has happened. The Zora arrived in Gerudo without incident, right?”He gave her an apologetic look and shook his head.Zelda eyes began to glisten. “What happened?” She whispered.With a sigh, Link returned to Vah Naboris's travel gate, and scanned the plateau below them for any signs of the Zora warriors, his hand instinctively reaching to his sword hilt.“They’re coming for Naboris,” he explained. “It was my fault.”Beyond the sands were still, but any moment now, Link was sure the Zora silverite armour would appear, and their troubles would begin again."There's nothing you can do now, Link," Zelda said, appearing beside him, a hand on his elbow to usher him inside. "The Zora must still be a way off."Together they returned inside. The main chamber of Vah Naboris was an enormous cylinder of ancient darkened stone, hollow save for the walkways that interlaced to meet the central main control unit. A long green strip of luminescence ran like a spinal cord across the floor, pulsating gently with the electrical energy that powered Naboris; the sort that would mean certain death for any Zora who came within one hundred feet of the Divine Beast. While they waited for the Zora to appear, Zelda decided that the best option to prevent further catastrophe was to lead Vah Naboris into the desert, and hide her within the sandstorms that raged in the southwest.While Zelda ran a quick diagnostic on Vah Naboris, Link occupied himself by taking a mental inventory of the Malice remaining within the Beast. To his relief, there was very little left - nowhere near as much as was within Vah Ruta. What was it that Zelda had told him? Malice is just water corrupted by the Calamity. Made sense that not as much could survive out in the desert."I don't want to do an override," Zelda was muttering to herself, her eyes fixed on the Slate. "But I don't know that we have time..."Link wasn't sure what she was talking about. Didn't the Beasts need pilots? He wasn't aware they could be forced - it seemed dangerous. So much power at the hands of someone who might not understand. He leaned up against the Main Control Unit, not wanting to stray too far from Zelda while she worked. What would have happened, he wondered, if the pilots of the Divine Beasts had turned on Hyrule itself? What could have stopped them from turning the Beasts upon each other?Link racked his brain, sifting through the piecemeal memories and images from before the Calamity. He searched and searched, trying to remember if the kingdom was always as fragile as it was now.Hyrule had seemed smaller back then, he discovered. As though its people were pieces of a whole and not isolated survivors, flung to the far corners of the world. No wonder the races were now so weary of the Hylians, and of each other; until a few months prior, the Calamity had never really ended. Living with a crisis on the horizon would be enough to make anyone uneasy. And unease brought distrust, and distrust brought misunderstanding.A warbling roar shook the central chamber, startling Link from his musings. He snapped his gaze back to the terminal at the main control unit, where Zelda was stood holding the Slate up to the pedestal."Why won't you— what's wrong!?" She was muttering, exasperatedly tapping away at the Slate.Another deafening cry reverberated through the chamber, only this time the tremors did not stop. There was a cyclic, whirring noise flecked with static that seemed to be emanating from all directions. Link saw sparks of electricity flaring from the strip of green light at the base of the room.Zelda held the Slate at the terminal. "I know, I know, I'm sorry," she whispered. "Please-"There was a familiarity to the noise that brought with it a creeping horror. Link had heard it before - the whirring, the static. Before he and Chief Riju had first appeased Vah Naboris; when the Beast had started to rage. Link raced over to one of the round windows along the edge of the chamber and craned his neck to look up to the twin humps atop Naboris. An enormous, swirling ball of static was beginning to form between them. Down below, only a few hundred feet away now, the Zora warriors were all gazing up towards the Beast. One turned to flee, while the others stood frozen, mouths agape. She's going to kill them, he realised. She's going to kill us!"Stop!" Link cried, sprinting back to the terminal. "The Zora are nearly here!"He snatched the Slate away from the terminal and out of Zelda's hands. Immediately the electrical whirring quietened, and Naboris gradually began to calm.Zelda snatched her Slate back. "How else are we going to move her without an override?" she hissed. "We don't have a pilot..."And then, gleaming with determination, her emerald eyes lifted to meet his. Link gingerly tapped a finger to his chest. Me?"You freed her from Ganon. You carry the power of her last pilot." Zelda's excitement seemed to grow with every word. "It is the better choice...the only choice! Come on, the Zora will be here in minutes, we need to move."There was no refusing her, not once she had made up her mind. Zelda registered Link with the Sheikah Slate as she had with Sidon; a simple click and a breathless wait.Naboris roared again, her deafening cry causing the central chamber to quake."Wonderful! Just wonderful!" Zelda beamed up at Link. "Naboris has accepted you!"Hesitantly, Link placed a hand on the main terminal as he had seen Sidon do in Vah Ruta. In an instant he was overcome by the sensation of an otherworldly awareness, and enormity of spirit. For half a heartbeat he could feel every ancient panel, gear, and core within the Divine Beast, and sense her every movement.That was when he heard it. It was almost like the voice of the Sword, but more distant, more detached. A whisper only, yet it echoed within his soul like a shout.
You would pilot me, Champion.
"Vah Naboris!" Link called out in astonishment. He turned to Zelda, who was watching with keen interest. "She spoke to me!""Good. Talk to her," Zelda urged. "She needs to be reassured."Link cleared his throat, not sure how to address the Beast. He had heard that they had something like a soul, but had no idea they could speak. Did Mipha speak to Ruta? Revali to Medoh? And the others to theirs?"Some Zora are trying to reach you," Link tried to explain. "They want retribution, for the death of their friend. And…if they reach you, they could be killed, and then more would come for you. But there are storms you can hide in...do you know where they are?"
I do.
"Then you know where to go! We can go there together, and you'll be safe."The Beast was silent for a time, but finally she spoke.
Very well, Champion.
Link turned back to Zelda, nodding happily to indicate his success."Ready when you are, Naboris," Link called out to the Beast.Ponderously, Vah Naboris' inner mechanical workings whirred to life, and she rose gradually from her perch atop the eastern mountains. Her wide, curved legs alternated rhythmically as she turned towards the southwestern storms, and began to descend down Spectacle Rock. If Link closed his eyes, he could almost imagine that her movements and his were one. Vah Naboris's great voice spoke to him again.
I know the path, Champion. You may rest.
Link slowly withdrew his hand from the panel. Backing away from the central unit, he and Zelda walked over to the nearby outside passageway to observe Vah Naboris's progress down the slope. Zelda estimated that it would take about an hour to reach the sandstorm in the south. Not wanting their spare time to go to waste, she insisted they attempt the cleansing ritual again."There appears to be less corruption here," she mused, her thoughtful gaze passing over the gargantuan interior. "Perhaps it won't be as difficult."Link was not so certain, but conceded anyway. Zelda had improved in strength since their last attempt atop Akkala Citadel. And… surely her magic couldn't kill her. The thought was too absurd to entertain.“Are you sure you’re feeling up to it?” He pressed anyway.“No,” she answered, the honestly surprising him. “I’ll be relying on your help.”With that she held out a hand, and he gladly took it. They proceeded as before: hands interlaced and eyes closed, with the Sword centered between them. But still, the stress of the previous week was strong in Link's mind, and proved difficult to clear. Is this all I am? Destined to fight, and fight.Link tried to follow his own advice, and let his thoughts come and go - though he found it more troublesome than before. He was determined not to let his fretting interfere with their work, though his dismay felt like a Lizalfos' claws - strong and sharp, clinging tightly around his throat.Vah Naboris suddenly bellowed, her ancient voice filling Link's head.
This cannot proceed. I am not at rest.
Link sprung back from the Sword, releasing his grip on the hilt. The sudden full weight of the blade in Zelda's hands caused her to drop the Master Sword, the metal tip clanging against the stone.Zelda stumbled, pulled abruptly from her meditation. "What are you doing?!""It won't work," Link told her. "Naboris...she needs to power down first.""She spoke to you again?"Link nodded wordlessly, unsure of why he was so certain. It was as if the Beast had said more than just words - like it had communicated an inherent truth, however that was possible. Zelda pondered his words, running her right hand over the main terminal. Eventually she sighed softly in resignation. "We can always come back."There was nothing to do but wait. Link and Zelda returned to the outer passageway, a wide dome-shaped observation deck from which they could see the vast desert that stretched out before them. They sat down together, leaning against the outer wall of Naboris' body, watching the desert pass by as the Beast shifted and swayed through the sand. Despite the shade provided by the upper level of the Divine Beast, the air around them was sweltering and uncomfortable; Link quietly longed for rain, and dewed grass, and soft earth. A desert eagle slowly soared past, the brilliant sun catching its white and brown feathers, and for a moment, Link was in awe of the visceral beauty that pervaded the desert. Life was such a struggle here; yet it was bright and beguiling all the same. Beside him, Zelda's head was bowed, and she almost seemed to be asleep."You okay?" he asked, shifting his weight to settle more comfortably against the stone."I'm sorry - I was just…." She inhaled slowly. "It’s coming back to me now. We’ve been with the Gerudo and Zora every day, trying to get them to see reason. But I’m no diplomat, there simply wasn’t time for lessons of that kind. I think I only made things worse.""None of this is simple," Link said, half reassuring her, and half lamenting to himself."I didn't expect it to be this complex." Zelda muttered. "And I should have known Naboris would be this stubborn, considering who her last pilot was."Link bowed his head, wiping some sweat from his brow. “This was all my fault,” he frowned. “I told the Zora that Naboris didn’t have a pilot. That’s why they tried to attack her.”“You couldn’t have known–”“I should have dealt with them myself. Instead, we came here and …you were hurt.”She looked him dead in the eye, and only then did he feel his thoughts finally arrest and his mind clear. “I survived. We survived,” she said, and Link acquiesced. Enough self-pity, he decided.Zelda ran a thumb over her right palm, turning her hand over to examine the dim Royal Crest that was now permanently glowing against her skin. When did that happen? Link wondered."I hope Urbosa knows that Naboris is safe," Zelda continued, her eyes never leaving the low light of the crest. "I hope...she's proud of us.""She is," Link reminded her. "You know she is.""I do. And, I remember what she said to you. No one need carry blame."Link took the words to heart, determined to let his worries go for at least this peaceful hour they had aboard Vah Naboris. He look at the golden mark on Zelda’s hand, admiring the softness of its glow.A moment of silence passed between them, one that spoke of possibility, but Link wasn’t sure how to act on it. Zelda lifted her head. Her hair shifted across her face, and she gave him a small smile. "What about you, Link? Are you okay?"Her eyes met his, and for a moment Link was taken back by how vibrant she looked - how real she was. His answer struck him like the ringing of a bell; sudden and clear. I’m at peace if I'm with you.Link shrugged, fighting the urge to brush the hair from her face. "I'm okay if you're okay," he smiled back.Zelda laughed softly, her face brightening, with little crows' feet cinching at the corners of her eyes. "Well, I'm okay.”'Then...so am I,' Link said, and under Zelda's gaze he was almost sure he meant it.As Zelda had predicted, it took almost an hour for Vah Naboris to cross the desert, her great lumbering legs carrying them deliberately across the sands. The Beast stopped at the periphery of a raging sandstorm in the East Barrens, and spoke once more.
I enter the storm. Go now.
To Link and Zelda's mutual relief, the Zora were nowhere in sight. If they had sense, they would have returned to Kara Kara Bazaar the moment Vah Naboris rose from the cliffs. Link and Zelda agreed that Zelda would to teleport alone back to Gerudo Town: they were in no hurry and wanted no repeat of the earlier incident with Zelda’s memory. Plus Link could move quickly in his golden sandals, and would be able to harness a wild sand seal to take him back to town.While all of that was partly true, he mostly just wanted some time alone. The blazing sun above and blistering desert winds in his face would help empty his mind of thoughts - at least he hoped. Faces flashed past: Rilla's empty features, Larella's haunted eyes, and Zelda's smile, painted soft on skin that seemed like porcelain. And then, the angry faces of the Zora warriors, and Riju's defiant glare as she met them at the gates of Gerudo Town. He wanted it all behind them, and to be done with this place. He and Zelda could return to the lush grasslands of Central Hyrule and maybe there he would tell her or would find the words to tell her the feeling that had begun to coalesce within him. But not here, not in this deathly desert and not while chaos still reigned in Hyrule.Link had found no peace by the time he ground to a halt at the gates of Gerudo Town with his sand seal. At least Naboris is safe, he thought sullenly. Even then that business was not done, while the Divine Beast was haunted by malice.The shouts he heard as he approached Riju's throne room, however, told him that there was even more work still. He slipped into the chamber unnoticed, immediately struck by the festering tension that pervaded the room. One wrong move and the whole place would go up, it seemed. Just as it had at the gates."Eight Gerudo warriors! Eight!" Larella was almost screaming. "And you have no idea who did this!""There have been no signs of any rebellion - that I promise you," Riju shot back. She was gripping the arms of her throne so tightly her knuckles were white. As with her previous meetings with the Zoran diplomat, she was flanked by her bodyguard Teake, and her three advisors clad in white. Zelda stood in the shadows, her face distraught."This isn't a rebellion anymore!" Larella shouted. Her face was streaked with tears, and there was a small piece of parchment clutched so tightly in her hand that it was crumpled. "This is an act of war!""The letter says as much!" Teake growled.Link moved quietly to Zelda's side. "What happened?" he whispered. Zelda could not speak, only shaking her head despondently.Riju's voice was measured against the air of tension in the room, but Link could hear her begin to falter. "We will find those responsible, Ambassador. The attackers will not escape our justice,"Almost-hysterical scorn crossed Larella's features. "And how and where will you find them? You said yourself that you have no idea!""Hyrule Castle!" Zelda said suddenly and definitively. "That is where you will find your culprits.""Hyrule Castle is a ruin," Riju said. She glanced nervously at her advisors, and they nodded their heads in unison. "Do you really believe bandits would bother taking it?""Bandits?" Larella scoffed. "You think bandits did this!?"Link could take no more. "What happened!?" he demanded, shocked by the volume of his voice, and the ire that simmered underneath it. The rest of the room's occupants seemed to startle, their gazes fixed on him as an uncomfortable silence settled. Riju opened her mouth to speak, but hesitated, passing an apprehensive glance at Larella. It was Zelda who finally spoke."We received a letter. Larella did. This morning." She was wringing her hands. "There was another attack on Zora's Domain. This time it was the city that was targeted. Vah Ruta and Sidon are safe, but.…""King Dorephan is dead," Larella's brow was furrowed with a mixture of fury and despair. "The Zora called the attack an act of war.""And now they've returned the volley," Riju concluded. She bowed her head, as if daunted by her own words. "And have declared war with us."Perhaps it was the lack of sleep, or his general weariness and loathing of all the turmoil in this desert, but for a moment Link almost burst into mad laughter. Surrounded by downcast faces, an unimaginable tragedy at his feet, with the place he once considered home beset by enemies and its King murdered in the conflict - somehow, in this new Hyrule, the only thing left to do was laugh at the cruelty of it, and the gall of the Goddess to allow such a thing to happen.Link fought back both a smile and a scowl, and let his face drop, and his features harden - a coping mechanism, from long ago. The women in the room were looking at him expectantly, but he had nothing left to give them but a heavy sigh, and the stoicism born of being a knight.Riju's advisors urged the Chief to end the audience and allow Larella leave to mourn her King. The Ambassador had been motionless since her last outburst in the throne room, the letter clutched between her webbed fingers and her tears rolling down her face. Riju was nodding, and had opened her mouth to speak when a low, rumbling voice was heard outside the throne room. Faces turned to assess the newcomer - a tall, stocky Gerudo stood at the doorway, the sunlight casting her sharp features in shadow."Lady Riju," she called out, striding purposefully across the tiles. As she entered the room, Link realised with muted alarm that she was dragging another Gerudo woman into the room by a piece of dark fabric secured firmly around her neck."Buliara?" Riju called back, bittersweet hope in her voice. As the women approached, no longer silhouetted by the sun peaking in through the doorway, Link saw that it was indeed Buliara advancing into the throne room. Her plain Gerudo garb was travel-worn, and she carried with her only a simple scimitar and shield - a far cry from the usual ceremonial armour and sword that she wore as Riju's bodyguard. Her hostage's Gerudo guard uniform was likewise frayed, except for the signature, and now-ominous, embroidered blue neckerchief tied tightly around her neck. Link heard Zelda gasp beside him.Larella stumbled out of the way as Buliara threw her hostage down against the tiles, the Gerudo woman landing hard at Riju's feet. Her mouth was gagged, and her arms were bound behind her back with rope. Judging by the dried blood spotted along her bindings, she had not been brought here willingly."Her name is Ayu," Buliara reported, not wasting any time with pleasantries. "I tracked her all the way to Zora's Domain. I witnessed an attack on their people, and I caught this one after the party of assassins fled. I trust you know that the King-""We know," Riju said solemnly."She has confessed her crime, and disclosed the name of the man who she joined to commit this attrocity. Cinelgen, he calls himself. A male Gerudo that passed our notice.""Impossible," Teake snapped, thumping her claymore against the tiles. "That cannot be-"“The impossible has happened, Captain Teake! Denial will not protect us!”Teake opened her mouth to speak, Buliara silenced the woman with a withering glare."He must be the same one that we met, then," Zelda said. She pulled out her Sheikah Slate, tapping gently at the screen with her index finger. A blue neckerchief just like the one Ayu wore materialised in her hands and she held it out for all to see. "We found this on a bandit. A Yiga, though she claimed that the Yiga were all gone. The Gerudo male wore the same kind.""As did all the attackers," Buliara confirmed.Link repeated the strange name in his head. Cinelgen. Cinelgen. Hadn't that spear-wielder Milagre spoken of someone named Cinna? Could he be the same person?"I don't understand," Larella had collected herself, though her pale blue face was still glossy from her tears. "There's some...new Gerudo clan?"Zelda shook her head. "No. This group seems like more than an offshoot. There are Hylians among them, and Rito too."Riju was eyeing the hostage before her with animosity and apprehension. "Do you have anything to say?"Buliara ripped the gag from the woman's mouth. Ayu spat and coughed, but eventually raised her head to glower at the young Chief."I may have confessed, but I'll never sell Cinna out," she hissed. "I won't tell you anything about him."Zelda moved quietly to Larella's side. "Ambassador, she is proof," She gestured towards Ayu. "Have her confess to your people what she has said to Buliara. Maybe then they will understand.""Ayu will not travel alone with the Zora. They will kill her long before they reach Zora's Domain, and eliminate any evidence of the source of conflict between our people," Buliara fixed her stiff gaze on Larella. "As for your envoy, you are aware that all of Kara Kara saw them, scaling the cliffs towards Vah Naboris."Larella's eyes went wide, and her face lost its remaining color. "I tried to stop them...I tried.…"Riju's voice cut across Larella's tremulous mumbling, condemning and irate. "Your warriors sought to harm Vah Naboris?""No-" Larella began. "I tried to stop them! They would have all been killed!""And thankfully they weren't," Zelda countered forcefully. "Naboris has been moved southwest, to the cover provided by the sandstorms."Riju nodded slowly towards her, before returning her attention back to the prisoner."This woman could escape, or like Buliara said be killed by the Zora on sight. But Zelda’s plan is the only one I have heard. Buliara, take the prisoner to the Domain, as well as any guards you need." Her hard emerald eyes settled on the Ambassador, judging and stern. "And Lady Larella. It is true, some of my people have turned against yours. But in seeking to attack Vah Naboris, your warriors have commited the same crime against us.""Chief Riju," Larella stammered. "It was never my intention-"Riju's tolerance was at an end. "There is nothing more to discuss. I offer you one of my own people to end this conflict. May the desert be kind to you." She drew herself fully upright, and looked down her pointed nose at the distressed Zora woman. "And for your sake, may we not meet again for a very long time."Eleven days past, a Zoran envoy of ten had marched into Gerudo Desert; now only nine were departing. According to desert customs, Rilla had been cremated at the East Gerudo Ruins. The remaining Zora were too fatigued from the lack of food and water to carry her home. The ceremony took place at evenfall, under the stars and the statues of the Seven Heroines; seven enormous Gerudo warriors rendered in pale sandstone, with downturned swords and eerie, expressionless eyes. Legend held that these divine warriors had once protected the desert from harm. But they are all gone now, Zelda thought morosely as she reflected on the ceremony. And so under the open sky, the Zoran envoy had watched as the flames engulfed their youngest warrior, and wept both for her, and their murdered King.It was Buliara who had counseled Riju to allow the beleaguered Zora to honour their dead. The fallen were the innocents of war, she had said, and deserved respect.Riju's bodyguard had also obeyed her decree to escort Ayu to Zora's Domain, selecting a single guard to assist her - Leena, a young woman taller than even Buliara herself, with earthen skin and fiery hair. She was quiet, but keen, and could be seen practicing her spear drills at both dawn and dusk. The trio of Gerudo took only two horses, the prisoner still bound and sharing a saddle with Buliara. In appearance, Riju's bodyguard was just as imposing and powerful as any Gerudo, with stern brows and sharp features accented by a knife's-edge nose. But Zelda sensed a compassion and level-headedness to Buliara that would have proved useful in mediating the talks with the envoy - traits that she hoped would eventually be passed on to Lady Riju. The girl has lost her mother, Zelda reflected. Just as I had. But the Goddess was kind to leave Riju with good counsel, and subjects who loved and respected her.The Zora were given until the following noon after the ceremony to leave the desert, and Zelda had decided that it would be appropriate that she and Link escort them home. Determined not to return to the Domain empty-handed, Ambassador Larella decided that Buliara could travel with her envoy as well. The Gerudo and the Zora would arrive at the Domain together, allowing Buliara to recount her case without being harmed. Ayu would confess her crimes to the Zora, and speak of the man called Cinelgen. Zelda would present the blue neckerchiefs and her own experiences as evidence that the bandits were indeed an outside force and, with Larella's help, would attempt to convince the Zora that the Gerudo people were not responsible for the death of King Dorephan, and that a new threat was assembling in Hyrule Castle.That was the plan, at least. It was a long plan, and not a very solid one, brimming with chances for failure. At least, with Larella and Buliara at her side, she would not be alone this time as she bowed yet again before the Zora King. And not just any King either; it would be Sidon on that throne now.Curiously, the thought did little to ease Zelda's apprehension; it was simpler to argue with an enemy than a friend. Zelda cast her eyes over to Link, who was riding beside her. His face was blank, his gaze and likely his thoughts somewhere far away.They were now a few days out from the desert. They had passed through the Gerudo Canyon, and across a newly constructed bridge of rust-colored Gerudo sandstone - to be called the Geldarm Bridge - before heading east towards Lanayru. As they passed over the Geldarm, Buliara proudly explained that following Calamity Ganon's defeat, Riju had ordered that Digdogg Suspension Bridge be upgraded into a wide stone pass. A sturdier bridge would improve trade and ease passage into the canyon."Though we may come to regret it," she finished under her breath, eyes glancing sidelong at their Zora companions.Despite the fact that the Zora outnumbered the Gerudo three-to-one, the envoy never hesitated to voice their concern at travelling with those who were their enemy. Neither party wanted to walk ahead of the other, and they refused to acknowledge each other when they made camp. Link and Zelda had to ride between them as a buffer, with the desert trio at the front, and the envoy of Zora behind. And naturally Buliara was weary of the nine pairs of angry eyes that followed her every step. Well, eight pairs; Ambassador Larella had passed the journey so far with her eyes fixed to the ground.It was a look that Zelda knew well; Larella must have considered every misfortune that had befallen her people to be her fault. The unspoken familiarity between them had made Zelda resolve to talk to her the next time they made camp, as Zelda knew that the events in the desert had been beyond Larella's control. Still, she was surprised by her own budding sympathy, let alone solidarity, for the Ambassador. I once hated you, she thought, remembering the haughty attendant that Larella had been at their first meeting. But that was when I didn't understand.Under the strain of distrust, the time dragged by. A full week elapsed before the party passed beneath the shadow of the Great Plateau."Can you see them, Link? Up there - two Guardians." Zelda pointed out, looking up towards a pair of decayed Guardian stalkers that were teetering on the edge of the walled cliffs, their long segmented legs wrapped around the precipice. Link followed her line of sight, and gave her a cursory nod."I wonder if they were there originally, or if they somehow scaled the Plateau during the Calamity…," Zelda pondered aloud. She had been doing her best to ease the tense silence in which they rode, but it seemed that none of her travelling companions were in the mood to talk or otherwise lighten the overwrought atmosphere.Link, for the most part, had held a steady silence. He barely spoke, but his eyes told his moods true enough. Zelda had seen those eyes almost every day for the past three months, and now felt she could read what lay underneath. When he was not locked in his musings, there was a hypervigilance - a desperation - that simmered under the surface. When they made camp, he stood guard well after the sun had set, only leaving his post to eat, and later sleep. Zelda was half-convinced that he slept with that sword drawn, and within grasping distance.Her fellow Hylian was jumpy as well; the previous night she had only touched his shoulder to ask if he wanted some food, and by the time he realised it was her, he'd half drawn his sword."It's only me, Hero," Zelda chuckled.Link just frowned at her. "Don't call me that," he grumbled, resheathing his sword and returning wordlessly to his post. Zelda had wanted to reach out to him them, but his eyes were already fixed back on the horizon, and the moment had passed.Weary Gerudo ahead of her, mourning Zora behind, and a sulking knight at her side. Zelda racked her brain for a more miserable journey, but found that she didn't need to think for long.It had been tradition that members of the Royal Family were interred in Kakariko Village's cemetery, and that the surviving members make the pilgrimage with the deceased. Zelda's mother had looked like a divine being when she had died. Still and perfect, as if her features were painted on her porcelain skin. The priestesses of Hylia had dressed her body in a flowing white dress and golden jewelry adorned with the royal crest. They had dressed the babe too, though Zelda could not bring herself to look upon his little face. She wasn't afraid of the tiny creature - and tiny it was, smaller than any baby she had ever seen. It was the rage, and the pain of the loss, that made her abhor it. You killed her, she remembered thinking when she saw it, all swaddled in white cotton and laid at her mother's side. You did this.Zelda and her father had accompanied the funeral procession on that arduous trip to Kakariko. While the village was not far, and the roads were well maintained, it had been the midst of winter. One of the worst blizzards in living memory had descended upon them, hindering their progress for the entire journey. Zelda shivered and shook the whole way, the cold eating deep into her skin and grasping at her bones. But not once had she cried. To cry was to accept her grief. To cry was to kill her mother again.She had only been six years old then, but looking back, it seemed that the journey to Kakariko was when she had been at her strongest. I must be strong now, Zelda compelled herself. She could admit to herself that she had truly begun to feel more alive, more solid; perhaps it was the constant work, or maybe the constant exhaustion, that had driven her lingering sadness away. But what she didn't like to admit was that the weight around her heart was not entirely gone. Some nights she would still wake with tears on her cheeks. Some days she could barely bring herself to speak. And somehow Zelda knew that until she found some peace, whether it be in reclaiming her castle or by some other path, the weight would never truly leave her. But I must press on, Zelda decided. If only because I have no other choice.As the mixed party skirted the cliffs of the Great Plateau, Zelda sensed the first chills of the late afternoon. There was less than a moon's turn left in autumn. The sky had begun to darken earlier in the day, and in the mornings the grass on which they made their camps was coated with a cool dew. Today's sun set just as the group arrived at the Gate Post Town ruins, and they set up their camp among the rubble and eroded stone. A light rain had been falling since midday, and the ground was soft and damp.Zelda and her father had stopped here on their way to Kakariko, she remembered. There had been a woman who ran the small inn where they had spent the night, and she had given the young princess a buttered pastry to take with her once the royal company departed. If Zelda closed her eyes, she could still remember the rich and savoury taste of the butter on bread. But there was nothing left of the inn now.The Gerudo arranged their small camp on one side of the ruins, and the Zora on the other. Link organized their camp between the two, and when he was done he stalked to the edge of the ruins to stand vigil, sword kept at his back and thoughts kept to himself.Zelda had hardly settled down against one of the damp cobblestone walls with her Slate, when a commotion broke out. Frantic shouts emanated from the direction of the Zora camp and soon one of the Zora warriors stormed past her towards the Gerudo, Ambassador Larella following closely behind. He carried a long silverite spear, and his face was twinged with a boiling, righteous rage."Rhett! Rhett!" Larella was pleading desperately, her cries drawing the attention of the entire camp. "Don't do this!"The Ambassador threw herself at the taller warrior, wrapping her arms around his torso in a vain attempt to stop him. Rhett threw her off with a violent jerk of his left arm, not sparing her a second glance as Larella fell hard against the rain-slicked earth.Zelda leapt to her feet and raced through the ruins to the Ambassador, helpless to stop the furious warrior from marching directly into the Gerudo camp."Murderers!" he shouted, aggressively brandishing his spear. "King slayers!"Just as Zelda knelt at the Ambassador's side, she heard the harrowing sound of steel against steel, and the wet squelch of boots against the mud.Another standoff; another spear angled at spear. Buliara stood in front of her prisoner Ayu, her own golden weapon brought to bear as she stared down the Zora before her. Her stern olive eyes set the challenge: let us dance, warrior. They stood as if suspended in amber, neither moving and barely breathing as they waited for their opponent to strike. And soon Link was before them, his sword drawn and his feet toeing the invisible boundary between Rhett and Buliara. His eyes flitted nervously back and forth, as if trying to determine who he was to protect."You will not harm her," Buliara declared. "She is my hostage, not yours.""Blood calls for blood," Rhett bit back savagely. Zelda could hear his heavy breathing from where she knelt by Larella; every line of his body spoke of a rage ready to erupt.Buliara's eyes narrowed, and she shook her head. "Not where I am from."Zelda watched with bated breath; the party's distrust was already stretched thin like fraying rope. A single misstep, and it would snap. The trio did not move; Zelda redirected her focus to the fallen Ambassador."Let me help you stand," she whispered, gripping the woman's shoulders in her hands. Larella was bracing her left elbow with her right hand, and Zelda saw the small pool of blood that had collected in her palm.The steel rang again; high and strident. Rhett moved first, lunging towards the taller Buliara, but it was Link who caught the spear. Deft and sudden, he swung his blade to deflect the silver shaft, driving the spearhead hard into the dirt. Buliara jolted backwards, her spear raised defensively, while Rhett wheeled around, tearing his own weapon from the ground with both hands and shifting to face Link."No!" Larella shrieked as she bolted from Zelda's grip. She seized Rhett's spear, wrenching it backwards with all of her strength. The warrior fought her off with another shove, but this time Larella did not fall. She stood between Rhett and Buliara, her hands raised."Rhett, please! Let it go!""How dare you!" he spat at her. "You knew! You knew what the Gerudo have done! The whole party knew but us! You lied to your own people!""I'm sorry!" Larella cried. Zelda could see the terror in her eyes. "I was afraid of what would happen.""But not afraid to defend these killers!?" Rhett challenged, fins flicking curtly towards Buliara and Ayu."They are the only chance for peace. Hyrule is vulnerable, Rhett. Can't you see?"Zelda felt a surge of kinship - of understanding - between herself and the wearied Zora woman. I do, she wanted to say. I see what you see.Rhett paid no heed. "I don't care," he said, shoving her aside again, his spear angled towards Buliara.Again Link lunged forward, this time knocking the spear from Rhett’s grip. In retaliation, the Zora raised his fists and struck Link across the face with the speed and ferocity of a cobra. There were shrieks all around as Link was knocked backwards, tunic and clothes muddied as he tumbled across sodden ground. Zelda watched, frozen, as he returned to his feet and raised his blade towards Rhett. This time it was Buliara who stepped in, her own spear striking the hilt of the Master Sword and knocking it cleanly from Link’s grip.“Halt, Hero!” She roared. “This is not your fight!”Cradling his wrist where his sword had been ripped from his hand, Link stumbled backwards and away from the confrontation, the expression on his face unknowable, a mixture of pain and fury and hurt.“This isn’t over,” Rhett growled. “I’ll kill you all for what has happened!”A final time Larella moved in front of him, holding him firm by the shoulders, and refusing to be pried from him."Enough! You cannot kill them unless you kill me," she said. "Is that what you'll do? Bring our King yet another death!?"For one terrible moment Rhett did not move, and Zelda braced for his answer. But he then withdrew, stepping backwards, allowing Larella to usher him a few steps away."Our king is dead,” he said. He looked towards Link, and spat in his direction. “Some hero you are.”And then he turned and marched back to the Zora camp. Weakened by her relief and exhaustion, the Ambassador dropped to her knees.Zelda hurried to Larella's side. "You've hurt yourself," she murmured softly. "You must have scraped yourself on the rocks when you fell."Buliara had lowered her spear, and was sighing and shaking her head. "When that voe threw her aside like rotten meat, you mean."The Ambassador did not speak, and only whimpered quietly as Zelda began to lead her away. Link stood passively to the side, lethargically retrieving his muddied sword. Zelda motioned for him to follow. You okay? She mouthed to him, but he did not answer.They led Larella to the nearby bank of Lake Kolomo, away from the others. There was still a small amount of daylight to illuminate their path, though it was rapidly disappearing, giving way to a heavy dusk sky of deep purples and rolling grey clouds. Zelda settled down at Larella's right side, while Link hovered at her left. His face twisting as he focused, the knight held his hands to the Ambassador's injured elbow."Might tingle," he warned. Larella nodded with a small sniffle, and then set her eyes across the dark waters of the wind-ruffled lake."I'm sorry...for that," she said faintly, before wincing slightly. She glanced down at the light in Link's hands. "That does feel strange.""I can't imagine the grief your people must be feeling," Zelda said. Her gaze drifted over to Link as well, and she studied his face, trying to fathom what he might be thinking about. Link noticed her staring, and for a moment their eyes met. He furrowed his brows, and returned to his work."Dorephan was a good king," the Ambassador began. "And he was kind to me. He saw what little talent I must have. I so wanted to prove that I wasn't sent because he...because..."The Ambassador could not finish her own sentence, but Zelda guessed it well enough. Because he favoured you."That couldn't have been why," she said.The healing must have finished, for Link moved to rise. Zelda gave him a stern look, and surreptitiously eyed the ground. Caught, Link sank back down."I wanted so desperately to prove myself. To prove I wasn't incompetent," Larella continued. She gingerly moved her arm, and tested her healed elbow. "That I could be trusted.""Then… why hide the news?" Link asked."I knew it would anger them, that impetuous Rhett especially," Larella explained dejectedly. "I told them Dorephan was still alive. I thought - if Sidon was the one to tell them, they couldn't hurt the Gerudo there and then, in front of their king. But out here? Those Gerudo are more vulnerable than we were in their desert.""Rhett found the letter?" Zelda surmised.The Ambassador brought her slender hands to her face, bracing her temples. "I kept it like a fool." Disparaging dismay crept into her tone. "I needed something to remind myself that it was real."Zelda clapped her hands down onto her lap, trying her best not to sound overly positive. "Well, we aren't far from the Domain now. Sidon will understand what happened.""Sidon barely knows who I am. And I'm not anything more than a commoner without my title. We don't even know if he will believe us," Larella wrapped her arms around herself. "I just wanted to help. I never wanted to believe the Gerudo did this."Zelda took one of Larella's hands into her own. "You know," she said softly. "I think I know what King Dorephan saw in you, Larella."The Ambassador's glassy eyes rose to meet hers. "You - really?""You alone secured an audience with Lady Riju, and you deduced that Buliara must arrive with us at the Domain." She gave Larella's hand an encouraging squeeze, and then let it fall. "And you see beyond your own people. You see Hyrule for what it is."Larella was speechless. Zelda looked to Link, eyes seeking. "I agree,” he said.Larella looked back and forth between the two Hylians, her mouth agape "You...you...how unkind I was to you when you first came to the Domain. And yet you sit here, and heal me, and praise me despite my failure."She stood abruptly and turned to face them, fingertips swiping the remaining tears from her cheeks. "Tell me, when this is done, will you take back your castle?"Zelda nodded, despite not being truly sure, and then rose from the bank, with Link mirroring her actions. "Before then, we will find the man who caused all this."Cinelgen. The strange name raced through Zelda's mind.Larella smiled, and then she curtseyed, the picture of a poised Zoran lady. "I will not pretend there is a place for me at the Domain now," she told them. "If you will have me, then I can be there. When you retake that castle - I will be by your side, and I will help you rebuild your home."Link and Zelda rested by the bank for a time after the Ambassador departed. A full darkness had fallen, and the gentle winds did little to mute the chirping of restless crickets hidden in the grasses."Home," Zelda eventually muttered. "I wish we could go home."She heard Link sigh. "What home?" he said, and stood to leave the bank.Ambassador Larella would not be cowed by Rhett, or by the other members of the Zoran envoy. The warriors and diplomats alike had demanded that the Gerudo trio travel to Zora's Domain alone, calling it reckless and unseemly for the envoy to travel with the people who killed their king. In response, Larella pointedly reminded them that not only was it pathetic that four seasoned Zora warriors were afraid of a single Gerudo prisoner, but that the envoy had both the Hero and the Princess of Hyrule to protect them."But...but...the Gerudo could take advantage and kill us in our sleep!" Farlo, one of the ambassadors, had claimed, garnering mutters of agreement and a few calls of 'hear!' from the rest of the envoy."If they planned to do that, they'd have done so when we were in their desert," Larella argued dismissively. "Not so close to the Domain."Her fellows grumbled among themselves, but logic was on her side, and the Ambassador would not back down. "Do what you will," she told them. "Outpace us, and risk being ambushed on your way to the Domain. Stay behind and I will go before King Sidon and name you as deserters."Caught between two equally dangerous choices, and trapped by Ambassador Larella's determined glare, the envoy eventually - and reluctantly - conceded. Their original plan would remain unchanged, although no one in the party would sleep soundly. At least they were only a few more days away from the Domain.Of all the uneasy sleepers, Link seemed to be the most fatigued. The standoff at the Gatepost Town Ruins had only caused him to double down his diligence for protecting the party; every second night he stood vigil by a low fire, unwilling or perhaps unable to sleep. These days, his face remained stoic, and his eyes were as still and hard as a frozen lake. Zelda thought - no, she had hoped - that their travels together had broken that facade he had made for himself. The one he had worn in the days before the Calamity. With so much at stake, and so many eyes upon him...She had hoped things were different now. That he trusted her. That he.…But at least she was not without a friend. Zelda and Larella now walked side by side along the paths of Central Hyrule, discussing politics and plans, and sharing stories of their homes. Larella educated her on just how complex the Zora court really was. There were multiple levels of nobility, she explained, and all completely mutually exclusive except in the case of an intermarriage that produced a child. Larella also told Zelda that Sidon would not actually be King in anything other than name until the Zora council held a referendum on his eligibility."No other race would have time for such nonsense," Larella explained, shaking her head dismissively as she spoke. "But we Zora live a long time. And with that comes all sorts of inefficiencies."In return, Zelda told Larella of the Calamity. The young Ambassador had been born a decade or so after the fact, and was keen to hear of it from one who was actually there. Reciting the tale was now as easy as unspooling thread; the words came unbidden and without emotion until there was nothing left to say. Zelda recounted all of it: her father's scornful words; her untapped power; the day of the Calamity; watching as her appointed knight threw down his life; the long trek to the Korok Forest, and then to Hyrule Castle.…Larella listened quietly the entire time, and when Zelda was done, she placed a slender hand on her shoulder. "You were so brave, both you and Link," she said. "And so few people understand."Zelda had waved off her kind words. The alternative was being well-remembered in a Kingdom destroyed by war...being forgotten wasn't that much of a price to pay for being alive.“I can’t help but wonder if it’s all too much,” she sighed, looking to Link who rode ahead of them, his Hylian hood drawn and his sword strapped tight to his back. “Link is… he was always quiet. I thought things were changing, that they might be as they once were but…”“Between the two of you?” Larella said gently.“I don’t know. That doesn’t particularly matter now. All I want is for Link to be content. He blames himself for your warrior’s trying to affront Vah Naboris. And he seemed so wounded by Buliara’s rebuttal of him just a few day’s past. I can’t help but wonder…”In another life, she wanted so deeply and could not have imagined what she was about to say. “Perhaps some time apart might help.”“What?” Larella said with a half-gasp. “But he is your appointed knight.”“He could go to Eldin, to seek Vah Rudania. You and I will handle the Zora. The Gorons are above these war games and politics. Perhaps there he might… regain some of himself.”Zelda looked up to gauge Larella’s reaction to the idea, but the Zora Ambassador betrayed little. Then, placing a jewelled hand on Zelda’s shoulder, she said, “Don’t make a decision on the road. Haste brings hasty ideas.”“I find walking clears the head a little.”“Take it from a Zora. Wisdom is best sought in stillness.”A week ago Larella’s lofty words would have annoyed her, but Zelda was determined to at least consider them, and after another hour of their travels she decided to at least wait until they passed by Eldin Canyon on the way to Lanayru to make any decision.The party stopped and settled at the western edge of the Lanayru Wetlands that evening, at a fork in the road marked by a tall aspen tree. This is where we encountered the Yiga woman, Zelda recalled when she saw the tree, and the nearby rocky outcrop upon which that woman had stood. The aspen had lost nearly all of its leaves now, and those that remained were tending to ashen colours and crumbling decay.Zelda met Link under the branches of the aspen a little while after the sun had set. The sky above them was dark and starless, and so Zelda had to find her way from the camp by the light of her right hand alone. It had recently begun to give off a diffuse glow of golden light, in the shape of the triangular Royal Crest, and she could not figure out a way to make it dim.Link gave her a cursory nod and a half-hearted grin as she approached, and then returned his gaze to the horizon. It was raining again, but the drooping leaves that clung to the aspen tree kept the rain from his face. He held his sword and its scabbard in hand, and a small lamp of burning oil hung at his left hip, throwing harsh shadows over his normally gentle face. His hand crossbow hung at the other hip."Everyone has gone to bed, Link," Zelda chided softly. "You can rest."He dismissed her concern with a short shake of his head. "I'll be fine.""You need to sleep. I know you are tired.""...I'll be fine." he repeated, the slightest hint of annoyance in his voice. Zelda opened her mouth to admonish him. I can see the bags under your eyes, hero. But the words never came. Link yawned and slumped against the aspen tree, and all of Zelda's annoyance at him was drowned in a sudden swell of compassion.If he would not sleep, then she would at least make sure he was not lonely. The guilt that had gripped her since Link had awoken from his slumber had recently given way to a hunger; a longing to see him happy, as if there was no other way to atone for how he was affected by her failures. A silence fell between them then, punctuated only by the sound of the raindrops on the leaves."I haven't been able to stop thinking about those Guardians we saw at the Great Plateau," Zelda confided. "I've only just realised that there were active Guardians atop the Plateau that day. Imagine how close we were to losing you. It might have all been for naught.""Might still be," Link mumbled under his breath. He must have sensed her hurt, because he immediately turned and tried to take back his words. "Sorry. I didn't mean-"Zelda had finally had enough."Tell me the truth," She demanded. "All this, with the Zora and the bandits - how are you really feeling?"Link opened his mouth to speak, but hesitated. His chest heaved through a long sigh, and he remained silent."You can talk to me," Zelda urged. Didn't he remember? All those times they had refused to speak to each other, and the pain it had caused them both. Why weren’t they past this?His words seemed heavy, every syllable a struggle. "Just...not now.""Well when?! When things are better?" Zelda tried to temper her rising anger, but failed. "That might not be for a while - might not be ever!""You think I don't know that?!" he snapped."Link - please" she begged. Her voice broke as her own exhaustion washed over her. "Don't you remember what you said to me in Naboris? I'm okay if you're okay. Well, that goes both ways."Link drew back. "You remember that?""Of course I do."He conceded with a sigh, and pushed off the tree's trunk. Refastening his scabbard to his back, Link peered at the camp behind them. All was silent, and there was no light from either side save the last fizzling embers of their camp fires."Not here," Link said, and began to walk down towards the Hylia River.They stopped within a small copse of trees, the rushing river ahead of them. These ones too were almost bare for the winter, and the rain fell freely between their branches. Zelda used her sleeve to wipe her face of stray droplets, shivering slightly. She untied and re-tied the obi of her Sheikah robe as Link hooked his lamp onto a tree branch, his sudden air of calm unnerving her. When he was done he leaned up against one of the trees, head bowed as he collected his thoughts."I just...don't know what I'm doing," he confessed, peering out towards the river.Zelda stood before him with her hands clasped nervously at her chest. "What do you mean?""I dunno what I do anymore.” "I...I really don't understand. Do you mean, about the Zora and the Gerudo?""I guess," He shrugged. “I can’t protect everyone here, not with idiots like Rhett around. Even Sidon… you know I thought he was our ally.""Sidon didn't declare war on the Gerudo," Zelda asserted, recalling Larella's advice on the Zora Court. "He's not King yet.""But he couldn't stop it?""I know...but..." Zelda's mind stumbled as she tried to piece together the right words; ones to bolster as well as reassure him. "This is what we have to do...we have to help them fix things."Link folded his arms at his chest, closing up. His words were terse, taut. Guilty even. "Do we?"Zelda was almost stunned into silence. She glared at him, lost. "They're our people, Link.""Your people. It's your kingdom. I'm just.…""You are a Knight of Hyrule. They are your people whether you like it or not.""'Whether I like it or not,'" he echoed petulantly, crossing his arms tighter. A gust of wind blew through the copse, and his lantern swayed erratically. The low light danced across the trees, but did not shine much farther. It was as if they were alone - the entirety of Hyrule just a memory on the horizon.Zelda wanted this to be over, wanted him back, she realised stubbornly. Whole, and alive, and hers, as the knight he was born to be. "Link, I know you must be tired–""I am!" he spat, his voice feverish. "We - we saved this kingdom from the Calamity, and now it's just falling apart.""It's not falling apart!""So it was always like this?"He had a point. "Well, we can still save it.""How? Fighting the Calamity was easier - I knew what to do then. I knew who I was, to everyone, to you."Zelda wrapped her hands around his and brought them to his chest. Link's skin was icy cold, and his fists were clenched. "You still do," she said firmly, looking deep into his eyes; two clear-cut sapphires framed by the droplets on his lashes. "You are a knight, remember? You help people. You fight for them. It's what you're best at."Link exhaled, crumpling against the tree, the anger and frustration wheezing out of him."How can I fight when it's people on both sides?" he said. "When it's all of Hyrule at war?"She gave his hands a gentle squeeze, running her thumbs across his calloused skin. "That isn't going to happen. I won't let it.""I wish I could be as sure, Zel," he muttered, a weak smile lifting his crestfallen face. Zel? The nickname gave her a small start, twisting her confusion and concern for him into something sweeter.Zelda wrapped her hands around his shoulders, bracketing him, bolstered by the fondness in his voice. "Listen to me. Do you remember what you taught me? Otra's words. Clouds, Link. These thoughts are just clouds.""...Clouds," he breathed."We aren't going to fail," she continued. "I am certain of it. We just need to keep pressing on."Again Link opened his mouth to speak, but no words came. He bit his lip. "I dunno, I just-""Let's put those worries to rest for now," Zelda said, stealing a glance in the direction of the camp. "We should head back.""Wait, no. Please," he gripped her forearm. It sent a shudder through her that ran all the way to her neck. Her hands were still at his shoulders. He's taller than me now, she realised, having never stood so close. When did that happen?"Okay, okay, I'm here," Zelda relented. "I'm always going to be here. We'll solve this together."Link sighed. "How do you know that?"Zelda pondered the question. Awkwardly, she withdrew her hands from his shoulders and clasped them across her chest. She began to file through the past three or so months as though she were reading through a familiar old book, pulling the moments out page by page. How could she know? What made her so sure - beyond the quiet, hopeful need to be at his side - that they could be anything like partners?And then she remembered."Do you recall that Rito song you told me about?" Zelda asked him. "It helped us with the Malice, didn't it? So maybe it meant that we have to persevere - that we can get through this if we have each other. The Hero and the Princess, remember?"He stared at her, eyes a little frantic, as if seeking something in her expression. Had she said something wrong? She had remembered the song correctly, hadn't she?And then Link's face softened, a smile curling his lips. "I remember.""Good. See?" Zelda beamed up at him. "We'll be fine."She was nearly overwhelmed by relief, and without thinking she reached up to brush the rain-dampened hair from his eyes. Her hand lingered, fingers entwined in a dark-blonde lock. The forest around them was gone then. There were no ruins, and no war. No slumber or sanctum to force a divide.It happened so fast. As though he was stepping through a strike; deft and sudden. Zelda moved to pull her hand away, but Link caught her, seizing forward to give her a quick, chancing kiss.The shock flashed past like a crack of lightning; bright and blinding, but gone in an instant. And then she was kissing him back, her fingers gripping his shoulders. And then again, and again, unable to stop the frenzy, not caring how clumsy and uncouth the whole thing felt. All that mattered was that he'd come back to her.Link had an arm around her waist, clinging to her as she clung to him, both needing this to be the answer to their problems. But the rain was falling between her eyes, and Zelda remembered where she was. And then why they were in this horrible, dark place to begin with. She snapped away from him, stumbling backwards over the grass."I'm - I'm sorry," Link was stammering, his eyes wide. "I shouldn't-""No don't, I'm...I'm sorry too-" Zelda could barely hear herself over the rain. Her thoughts turned back towards the camp by the fork. "We can't…not now..."Link had distanced himself, unable to look at her and gripping a branch so tightly she could hear it snap in protest. He is vulnerable, she realised with a hint of disappointment. In no state for something like that.Her wistful, guilty thoughts were drowned out by a sudden shout in the direction of the camps."Leena!" a voice cried. "Where is Ayu!?" It split the cold air, echoing long and hollow across the river bank. Neither Link nor Zelda said anything as they sprinted back to the camp.Buliara had a lamp in one hand and her spear in the other, and was frantically searching the Gerudo camp. Her assistant Leena was up as well, her own lantern in hand. The twin lights swung haphazardly in the darkness as Link and Zelda approached."Champions!" Builiara exclaimed when she saw them. "It is Ayu! We cannot find her!""W-what!?" Zelda cried. "She's missing? But she was bound!""I know," Buliara growled. "I tied her."Zelda's mind was swimming. Ayu could be anywhere; even hiding in the shadows, waiting for a moment to strike out against the sleeping envoy of Zora. Link was frozen beside her, staring angrily at the Gerudo bodyguard."Why weren't you watching her?" he demanded."She was bound to a tree!" Buliara retaliated. "Where were you, Champion?"Link and Zelda exchanged a quick, tense glance."We need to warn the Zora," Zelda managed, pushing her embarrassment aside. "There isn't time!"The Zora camp was already awake. Whatever had happened had disturbed them as well."Ambassador Larella!" Zelda called as she and Link approached. There was no reply, and Zelda felt her stomach drop. The warriors were combing through the camp, just as fervently as Buliara had been searching hers."Larella!" Zelda called again, and the diplomat named Farlo came into view, holding his own lantern in hand. The stunned and sorry look on his face told Zelda all there was to know. A haggard sob escaped her as the commotion broke out around them.The sky had split, a storm beginning to tear through the wetlands. The Zora crawled over every corner of the camp, while Buliara and Leena raced down to check on their horses.They returned with solemn, marble faces. "Ayu must have taken Larella, as well as one of our horses," Buliara reported matter-of factly-when she and her companion returned. "Leena and I must leave, immediately."Zelda was nearly in shock. "Wait - what!? Why?""We cannot travel with the Zora now, it is too dangerous. We will return to the desert, to counsel our Chief. Conflict is inevitable now." The bodyguard eyed the Zora camp with a weary resignation. She nodded her head in the direction of Hyrule Castle. "But you too must go. Rescue the Ambassador.""The castle!? You really think-?"Buliara nodded. "If you believe that this male Gerudo has taken your home, then Ayu will go there. I would travel with you but I would be a hindrance. I do not know the Castle layout, and I must inform Lady Riju of this."Buliara and Leena had saddled and loaded up their remaining horse just as the Zora began to realise what had happened. It was Farlo and Rhett who came to confront the Gerudo women, and Zelda breathed a sigh of relief when she saw that they were not brandishing spears."You let her escape!" Rhett shouted, a long finger pointed at Buliara like a lance."I did no such thing," Buliara retorted.Rhett would not back down, if he ever had. "You lulled us into security, and then kidnapped one of our own!""Why would I throw away our only hope for peace?" Buliara bellowed down at him. Her horse was stomping the ground nervously, reacting to the noise and the rage of her rider. "You saw the way she was bound. She could not have escaped alone. Why would I free her and remain? Have you considered, warrior, that there may be enemies among your own camp!?"Rhett was shouting a reply, but Buliara ignored him. She looked down to Zelda from atop her horse. "Little vai. Your only hope for peace is to find the Ambassador. Save her, and so save your Kingdom."Zelda nodded, resolute. "I will," she said, though a lingering doubt hung in her words.Buliara kicked the horse into a gallop, and she and Leena disappeared down the gravel path that led back towards Central Hyrule."Let's just go home, brother," Farlo was saying, tugging on Rhett's arm. The embittered Zora warrior said nothing as he scowled at the backs of the departing Gerudo, and then turned on his heel to march back to the Zora camp. As Zelda watched the Zora walk away, she realised that Link was no longer at her side.She found him crouching inside his lean-to, his head in his hands. The rain had eased, and there was no time to waste. If they hurried, they might catch Ayu before she and Larella reached the castle."We need to go," she said. "I know where they have taken Larella,""I heard what Buliara said," Link grumbled, not looking at her."Then we need to form a plan. Figure out the best way into the castle," Zelda began hurriedly gathering up her things.Link ignored her, and stood from his lean-to. Wordlessly, he pulled up his hood and turned to walk away from the camp."Where are you going!?" Zelda called after him, motioning towards their lean-tos. "I need your help with this."Link spun around. "Help!?" he cried, and then he shook his head. "No, no more - I'm done.""What are you talking about!?""You said Hyrule isn't falling apart. Look around and tell me this isn't what falling apart looks like," he seethed. "Hyrule Castle, taken. Gerudo and Zora at war! Sidon said he'd help and he didn't. Larella said she'd help and now she's gone!” He thumped his chest with a balled fist. “I can’t do this. I wasn’t made for this!”"Link, calm down! We just have to keep going!" Zelda argued fiercely, fighting through the urge - the need - to shake this exhaustion out of him.Link almost seemed to laugh then, a mirthless smile flashing across his face. He reached up to his sword belt, fingers working the well-worn leather buckle. "I've had enough," he said, shaking his head. "We tried helping them, and nothing we did mattered.""So you're giving up!?" Zelda scoffed. "Running away like a...like a frightened child?" Link recoiled at her words, wounded by the accusation, but Zelda did not care. She was tired of inaction. She was tired of doubt, and fear at every turn. "There isn't time for this. We are going to Hyrule Castle!""No," He repeated firmly, pain and weariness lingering in his voice. "I can't. I won't."Zelda watched with wide, uncomprehending eyes as Link unbuckled the Master Sword and its scabbard, letting them fall to the wet ground. He gave her one last apologetic look, and walked out into the rain.
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
Fields afire. The sky an angry red, weeping for the destruction of Hyrule.
Her knight is stumbling, weakened and near broken beneath the weight of it - the tragedy that none of them could have anticipated, could have even considered. And the Sword is broken too, shattered and splintered, dying just like he is.
A beady eye scans the field, singular and purposeful, until it finds them. Snaking legs carry the automaton closer to them, purple corruption clinging to its mechanical body, robbing it of its original purpose. And for one suspended moment, Zelda finds herself in awe of it - a Guardian.
It angles forward, laser whirring, ready to fire, ready to take the only thing she has left. The defiance is simple.
No!
She throws herself in front of him, raising a hand to the sky with desperation. Divine light erupts around them, with Zelda determined to salvage the one thing the Calamity had not taken from her. And the corruption is cowed, the Guardian collapsing dead before them. But her knight falls anyway, and in that moment the Sword speaks.
The choice is made in the absence of all others; Zelda is going to do what she was born to do. She is going to get them out of there. She is going to end this chaos. And one way or another, she is going to save him.
Most nights, Zelda dreamed that she was alone - swallowed once more by the beast, and gripping, grasping, onto a hope and a faith that this day of her wait within the Sanctum would be the last. Hands across her chest, a trepidatious light cradled between, clumsy and crude. A Princess with destiny stamped onto her right hand, but no clue how to wield it. Every night was the same; every dream repeated with the clarity and purpose of a pantomime. But, since her re-making, every morning seemed different.Zelda woke alone, her eyes heavy and her face still puffy from what she guessed was her own crying. Against her palm she felt something cool, and in the low light of the morning found the Master Sword within its scabbard resting next to her. She must have taken it into her lean-to, so that it was out of the rain - so that neither of them would be alone that night.He'll come back in the morning, she remembered telling the Sword. If we chase him, he'll never stop running.The Sword never spoke in reply. Perhaps it knew that she was right. After all, all storms eventually passed; all clouds moved on from the sun. Zelda peered out of her lean-to, and with some dismay was met with a gray overcast sky, oppressive and angry. She sat up and grabbed the Master Sword from its place by her bedroll, wincing at the suddenness of its weight, and stepped out into the morning light.Link was not there waiting for her. Aside from his wind-blown lean-to and the blackened ashes of the fire he had made for her the night before, there was no sign of him. Disappointment twisted in her chest. For half that miserable night she had sat in deliberation, the Sword across her lap, her heart suspended between determination and devastation. Every minute that Link was gone, their chance of rescuing Larella before her imprisonment in Hyrule Castle diminished, but Zelda could not fathom attempting the mission alone. Nor could she just abandon the Sword without its master.His absence brought an empty silence that she did not like. Link had always been there. Every waking moment that she could remember. Sometimes he was just a friend: someone to share the road with, someone to cook honeyed apples with, someone to sit by an oasis with and talk the afternoon away.Sometimes he had been more. Zelda's thoughts deviated again to the...whatever it was...that had happened in the copse by the Hylia River. The moment thrummed discordantly in her chest; a moment of reprieve now flecked with troubled sorrow. But more than that. Between the embarrassment and disbelief, she felt a little giddy. It had been...nice.But sometimes he had been an adversary, bickering and arguing with her, or teasing and coy, as though he knew a secret that she didn't. Sometimes he’d been little more than a lost boy, unwilling or unable to help her deal with the new politically muddy situations they found themselves in (or perhaps, Zelda was realising, situations they had inserted themselves into…).Sometimes she’d wanted to send him to Eldin or wherever, in the hope that when he came back he was rid of his moody gloom. Not that Zelda could have ever done that, she now realised. How could she, after he had remained at her side when her own fortitude left her in Kakariko. Those were the times when he had been a protector, as much as she had protested. Yet now she longed for that from him: eyes on the horizon, with a steady stance, body and mind at the ready, the knight as always, with the Sword in hand, both a weapon and a piece of his soul. But...Zelda held the Master Sword now, and that stupid, ridiculous boy was gone.Grasping the scabbard more firmly, Zelda examined its gold and navy detailing, before passing her eyes over the diamond-patterned hilt and proudly winged crossguard. Again its weight gave her pause; the Sword was surprisingly light. Heavy enough to feel formidable, but not enough to feel truly like a burden.Zelda looked to the looming Hyrule Castle, and the five menacing pillars of ancient stone and light that guarded it. If Ayu had ridden hard enough, she could have made it to the castle gates with Larella by now. There was no hope of catching the Gerudo and her hostage; saving the Ambassador would mean breaking into Hyrule Castle itself. Zelda scanned the surrounding grassy knolls for a mote or even the tiniest hint of a tunic rendered in white and blue, but found no sign of her companion against the sea of autumnal grasses and mud around the camp. Link will come back, she told herself again. He always has.But...had he? Seeing the Sword without its master fed the worry that had lingered at the back of her mind for some time now. The vague notion that the boy she travelled with now wasn't really Link - at least, not the way he had been. The slumber had taken his memories, true, but maybe it had taken a little more.Zelda tested the weight of the Sword again, tempted to draw it from its scabbard. If she wanted to, she could indeed carry it. Strap it to her back and wear it just as her absent knight had. And if he never came back, perhaps she should just take it to Hyrule Castle, and rescue Ambassador Larella alone. She could defend herself, perhaps she could wield a sword too.But not this sword, Zelda reflected. This sword was not hers; it was bound to the soul of another. Maybe that was why it felt so light; carrying it was not her burden. Zelda laid the Master Sword to rest inside Link's windswept lean-to, and busied herself with packing their things. She recited vitriolic, imaginary arguments in her head, tears beginning to rise unbidden as she called him all sorts of names for abandoning her like this. Fool and craven. You're not a hero, she found herself wanting to say, you're just a boy. She would grip him by the shoulders and make him come back to her, make him who he was.Their camp was all packed up and their horses both ready by the time Link returned. Like a weary elk he ambled over the hill by the camp, his tunic a little muddy and his hair still damp from a night spent out in the rain. If he had been exhausted before, he seemed now completely spent; his eyes were glassy and near vacant, marked by deep bags. Zelda buried the surge of affection she felt when she saw him, determined not to let the previous evening change things, or complicate their purpose. And she almost gave in, half-ready to take him into her arms, brush the hair from his eyes and apologise once again. I'm sorry, I had no choice, it was either lay you down in that Shrine or lose you forever…They stood apart from each other, separated by the ashes of the now-extinguished campfire. Link had his arms folded across his chest, and finally lifted his eyes from the ground, giving her an apprehensive, guilty look."I'm sorry for last night," he muttered."Are you feeling any better?" Zelda asked softly.Link shook his head. His eyes flitted to the Sword, which Zelda had propped up against one of the larger stones used to hold down their lean-to the night before, and she saw him tense."I just wish I could understand," she sighed. "You stormed that castle alone a few months ago. This should be easier.""That isn't it-""Then why, Link?" Zelda pushed. "I...I don’t—" I don't know who you are anymore. She couldn't say the words. Couldn't let herself voice what she knew was the truth; Link was different, in ways that both infuriated and infatuated her."I would tell you if I knew," Link replied earnestly.Zelda crossed her arms petulantly. The circles they were walking in had begun to make her dizzy. It felt like they had been talking about this for weeks; the same petty words and the same pointless arguments. "I can understand if you needed space." The hurt in her voice scratched against the back of her throat. "But...but you shouldn't have left."Link's voice immediately became defensive. "I wasn't far.""We weren't far when Larella was taken!""We weren't exactly paying attention!""And whose fault is that—?" Zelda's breath hitched, bringing with it a new tide of tears. She indignantly swiped at her eyes. "No, I shouldn't cry - I'm so tired of crying."But it was no use. A weak sob escaped her lips, and then Link's arms were around her, pulling her into a pacifying hug. Zelda tried to push him away, but Link was strong, and the sudden rushing despair within her stronger. Nothing was going well: the Domain was in shambles; her home taken by bandits; her first friend in years kidnapped, or worse; and her once beloved knight was now both a shadow and a stranger. There was nothing to do but to concede; Zelda held onto Link and wept softly into his shoulder, and from the way he was breathing she guessed he was working through his own tears. But unlike the night before, there was no shock at being so close to him. His warmth and solidarity was a welcome reprieve. It didn't matter what they were to each other now. They were both exhausted and alone and in need of someone. It would have to be enough."Why can't we just walk away?" He said eventually, entwining his fingers in a lock of her hair. "I bought a house in Hateno, you know. I know I said we didn't have a home but, we could just go there. Be normal people."Normal people. Not a Princess and a Knight; just two people alone in the world save each other. Isn't that what Zelda had always wanted? The dream was agonisingly tempting. But a dream was all it was; a one-hundred year echo of love she felt for a different boy in a different time. And then Impa's words were in her mind. United the people can recover from any tragedy...but torn apart…Zelda could never be anything but the Princess, she realised. Not until this mess with Cinelgen was done. Not until her duty to Hyrule had been fulfilled. She gently pried herself free from Link’s embrace, and pointed a finger in the direction of Hyrule Castle."That is our home," she said. "Half destroyed and still corrupted. But it's ours.""And you want it back?""Why shouldn't I? I've lost enough. My mother...my father...my friends…” Even you, she thought. "I don't care if I'm being stubborn. Stubbornness is all I have."Link face was downcast; he clearly did not share her determination. But it was almost noon, and the one thing they definitely didn't have was time. She fetched the sword from its resting place, and held it out to him."Take it," she commanded.Panic flashed across his face. "I can't….""Take it. Whether or not you come with me to Hyrule Castle, the Sword isn't my responsibility."The tension in him withered. "You...you'd go without me?""It's not a choice I would make willingly," Zelda admitted. "But…if I have a chance at salvaging just one thing. Forget Hyrule for now. I just want to save my friend."Her words seemed to steady him; her call to action to save Larella reaching through his confusion to a place where instinct dwelled. Link looked again at the castle, his brows furrowed as he measured its make."Feels like a cruel joke. It was easy the first time. And that was Ganon up there," he muttered, a rueful smile on his face. Zelda didn't know what to say. There was an honesty - a frankness - to his words that he had perhaps never shared with her. Link didn't seem to notice her slightly stunned look, and he continued talking. "But Cinelgen is just a man, right?"And men can be killed. Zelda understood immediately."A Gerudo like any other," she agreed. Link clenched his jaw, and Zelda saw his sword hand flex. A moment later he thrust out that hand, and into it Zelda placed the Master Sword and its scabbard. He strapped it across his chest and rolled his shoulders against the weight; the Knight once more."You got a plan?" he asked.Zelda reflected on the Castle layout, her mind's eye tracing the many paths and winding staircases both within and without. "If Larella is there, she's probably in the lockup," she concluded. "There's an entrance near the docks. We'll just need to find a raft."Link nodded, absorbing the information. He peered back at the Castle, a hand to his chin, deep in thought. "I'm going to need the Slate," he said. “I used it a lot in the Castle, when I went to get you. Plenty of hidden passage ways we can use. Unless you want to learn how to use the rest of those runes?"Zelda grinned. "You already know the answer to that.""Good." He rolled his shoulders again, bringing a hand to his wrist to adjust his bracer. "You sure about this?"Not entirely. Zelda nodded in spite of herself."I'm ready to go home, Link."There was nothing more to be said. They mounted their horses and rode northwest for Hyrule Castle.Heave. And heave. Link swung the Korok Leaf left, and then right, stepping through an unsung rhythm. And heave. In response, their simple raft glided through the silvery waters of the Hylia River, and gradually, like a storm crawling across the horizon, Hyrule Castle began to loom before them. Illuminated only by the full moon that peeked out through the cirrus clouds above, the Castle was a conglomeration of harsh shadows and jagged lines.Zelda stood behind him, out of the way; Link had expected her to be buried in the Slate, checking and cross-checking their plans for the assault, but she watched with a steeled face as the Castle's individual features came into focus. They sailed along the eastern approach, taking a longer route leading around Hyrule Forest Park, passing underneath the Helmhead Bridge to enter the castle moat. They met no resistance, and Link allowed himself to consider that this mission could be easier than his first time assailing the castle.The weight of the Sword still felt uneasy at his back. It was...lighter, than before. As though it was no longer his burden; or perhaps, that he was no longer worthy to wield it. Well, tell me then, he beseeched it. Are you and I still friends?He could ask the Princess the same thing. She'd been a little stiff and standoffish since he'd returned to her, and since she had returned to him the Sword. Understandable. He'd been an idiot, and a fool, whining about things as pointless and petty as his purpose and then kissing her as if that would help. Don't think about that, he told himself, but the thoughts invaded his mind regardless. He'd mentally replayed his actions the entire night he'd been on his own, lying in the wet grass wondering where the courage for that had come from when the rest of his fortitude now seemed to elude him. He swiped the Korok leaf with maybe a bit more force than necessary, embarrassment surging through him, needing an outlet. And heave.He maneuvered their raft ever closer to the ruined castle, pushing his thoughts to focus on the rhythmic swiping of the Leaf and the sound of the rushing wind and the raft as it cut through the water. But the closer they sailed to the remains of the Castle docks, the tighter the knot in his stomach grew. What if Larella isn't here? What if this is a trap? And what if Zelda gets hurt, or worse…?"Slow down," came the commanding voice behind him. Link pivoted on his heel to face her, nearly dropping the Korok Leaf in surprise. Zelda's face was partially obscured by her hood, but he could see the determined severity of her features. No longer his friend, no longer the Princess...but a vengeful assailant, ready to take back her home. "We need to approach slowly," Zelda warned. "We have no idea what waits for us at the Docks."Link simply nodded, and waited for the raft to slow before giving the Korok Leaf another swish across the sails. He was at least glad to be labouring through the cold air. He didn't know the exact date, but he could sense better than any other person the changing of the seasons. He'd spent a year out in the air of Hyrule after all; Link intimately knew the way the land shifted and changed with time - knew it better than he knew himself. Winter's welcome, thought the knight wryly as he shivered through a gust of wind that rippled the moat waters.He was grateful too that he and Zelda both had some decently weather-proof garb. They had swapped out their normal travelling gear for a pair of disguises; Zelda wore Link's red Hylian tunic and hood (along with, to his muted delight, the sturdy amber earrings Isha had given them), while Link wore his Hylian trousers and a moss-green winter doublet over a plain roughspun tunic. And to lend credence to their subterfuge, they both wore the signature blue and white neckerchiefs that they had acquired in their travels. The first taken from the Yiga woman they had fought at the fork, and the second from Ayu, the Gerudo hostage. It was a gamble; they had no idea if the neckerchiefs meant something, or if perhaps the bandits would, for some reason, only wear them on the road. But a disguise was a disguise. If it didn't work, they would revert to their second plan, and fight their way through the Castle. Link hadn't been able to part with the Master Sword for that very reason. Perhaps it would give them away - he didn't care. How many modern Hylians even knew of the Master Sword, let alone could recognise it on sight? And if it did give them away - well, it was a sword, not a soup ladle.They were almost at the entrance of the docks now, their journey thus far surprisingly smooth. Perhaps concerningly so. Link gave the leaf one last heave, and the raft floated slowly towards the narrow wooden pier on the north face of the castle, built just shy of the entrance to the actual docks themselves. Once the raft had thumped to a stop against the jetty, Link set about securing it and the Korok leaf to one of the rotting wooden bollards lining the wooden walkway. He gave the immediate area a quick scan - no signs of movement - and nodded to Zelda that it was safe to disembark."According to the map," she said quietly, the Sheikah Slate in hand and the small screen illuminating her face, "the Lockup should not be far from here. There is an excavation tunnel, now closed, where there is a back entrance into the gaol itself. If we're lucky, and avoid detection, we could be in and out of here in less than an hour."She reattached the Sheikah Slate to her belt, adjusting her tunic so that the Slate was hidden from sight. They knew that the bandits — specifically one of them named Cinelgen — wanted the Slate. The spearwoman named Milagre had said as much when they'd encountered her at the Sacred Grounds.Cautiously, Link and Zelda began to advance up the path to the abandoned mine entrance. Link took point, his movements stiff and body taut as he scanned for any signs of life. Again they found no one, not even a single guard by the entrance to the mine. Though the reason for that, they discovered, was simple. The tunnel had been completely caved in; heavy rocks and rubble covered the entrance, and the wooden bracing was splintered and twisted. Link felt his guts churn; acid hot in his belly, making his knees weak and his fingers twitch, long-held instinct making him want to reach for the Sword.They were going to have to go through the Castle."Rats," he heard Zelda mutter under her breath.She turned to retrace their steps, but Link held an arm out barring her progress. He tensed, honing his focus, closing his eyes and dulling all his senses but the ones he needed. Time seemed to slow, and around him, Link could hear everything from the soft lapping of water against the pier to the howling of the wind through the torn towers of Hyrule Castle."Something isn't right," he murmured as he reopened his eyes.Zelda's expression was blank, the faintest hint of lines in her brow. "Go on.""There's no one around," he explained. "No one outside the castle at all."Zelda didn't need him to explain further. "You think it's a trap.""It might not be.""But it may as well be," Zelda conceded. She gazed up along the bluffs that surrounded the castle, her jaw clenched as she pondered their options. Link followed her line of sight, before stopping to absorb their surroundings once more. Ahead of them one of the ancient pillars jutted out of the ground, cutting across the sky like a string of stars, its glimmering etchings pulsating to an unknown rhythm. There was another route to the lock up, Link knew; he and Zelda had poured over the Castle plans to find alternate routes in case this very situation occurred. But none of those routes were short, and the pair simply had no idea how many people Cinelgen had within the Castle walls.Zelda had wrapped her arms around herself, heavy doubt on her face. "Well...I’ll lead the way, then. Or, I can take it from here.”She still thinks I won't come with her, Link realised with regret."Zelda," Link called softly, redrawing his focus. She seemed to startle at hearing her name, but it gave him strength to say it. It gave him the courage he needed, knowing she was real."Y-yes?""I'm ready when you are," he assured her. "Larella's waiting for us."Zelda breathed deeply, but eventually she dropped her hands to her side, and gave him a steadfast nod.The aging Docks were housed in an enormous cavern of smoothly hewn stone, and consisted of little more than two wooden piers and a receiving bay built from surprisingly sturdy-looking brick and stone.The uneven roof of the cavern sloped laboriously towards the mouth however, and it appeared as though the entire place was continuously and eternally caving in on itself. As their raft glided back into the cavern, Link spied a single Hylian guard sleeping on the far pier and felt his sword hand flex involuntarily."What do we do?" he whispered to Zelda, who stood beside him."Just don't say anything. Act like we should be here."He frowned, hesitating. "What about you?""I'll do the same thing.""Right," Link whispered again after a pause. He heaved the Korok leaf against the sail, adding. "That wasn't clear.""How was that not clear?" Zelda hissed. The guard stirred, but did not wake. "Nevermind. Just don't talk.""I can manage that.""It's your specialty," Zelda clipped.Link found himself rolling his eyes, although he could not hide the smirk on his face. A part of him had come to enjoy their verbal sparring, he supposed.As quietly as they could, Link and Zelda disembarked from the raft, breathing silent sighs of relief that the Hylian did not stir. Mixed in with the slapping of water against the docks were the Hylian's rattling snores; his large head lolled heavy against his shoulder as he continued to slumber. Zelda waited on the pier as Link secured their raft, and while he worked Link allowed himself one, selfish sideways glance at her. She was assessing the castle map with her Slate, and in the faint light Link noticed her nose was a little red from the cold. He wondered what it'd be like to plant a kiss there, if it'd be as cold as it looked, and then he was wondering about other parts of her, and what those would be like and after that he had to physically shake his head to be rid of his thoughts. No matter what he tried he was unable to rid the events of the night prior from his mind. Talk to her about it, fool, he told himself. What are you so afraid of?Lots of things, Link figured with some shame. Perhaps everything, these days.Task finished, he checked his equipment once more to reassure himself that it was all there: his sword at this back and his crossbow at his hip, and range of movement uninhibited by his winter garb. He rejoined Zelda, and they stalked across the damp stones of the docks, the Hylian guard none the wiser as they ascended the aging brick steps of the receiving bay and headed deeper into the cavern, past the faintly glowing Shrine tucked against the back wall. Zelda paused to place a hand against the terminal as they passed the ancient structure, but Link ushered her on. No time.Their path diverged into two narrow tunnels at the back of the cavern, one twisting to the right and the other around to the left. Link tapped Zelda on the shoulder, and gestured to their two options, silently mouthing the question: which tunnel? She referred to her Slate and answered with a slow, deliberate gesture to the right.Link raised his brows. You sure?The glare she shot him in response was long and unimpressed. They went right.The tunnel was a long curving walkway that took them deeper into the belly of Hyrule Castle. Link lit a small torch to guide their way, and held an arm out for Zelda, which she took with a small amount of hesitation. The stairs underfoot were uneven and crumbling, and every now and then the tunnel seemed to shift and shudder as the foundations of the Castle creaked overhead, sending dust raining down along the walls.Eventually they reached a small hollow at the end of the tunnel, marked by nothing more than an unlit wall torch and a large metal slate blocking the tunnel exit. Link passed the torch to Zelda and raised his hands to the cool metal. He recognised the surface immediately - it was one of the hefty bookcases of the Hyrule Castle Library.He turned to Zelda. "Alright. Magnesis lesson."Excitedly, she pulled the Sheikah Slate from its hiding place under her tunic, and tapped through to the Magnesis rune. She held the Slate out before her and gently clicked the small switch on the side of the Slate. Her eyes lit up, and she gasped in delight; Link himself could not see it, but knew that the Slate had illuminated the metal bookcase for her in a vivid fuchsia hue."You can use that switch to turn the scan on and off," Link explained."And then just bring the Slate in front of yourself to activate the rune. But maybe—"His words were cut off by the burst of energy that erupted from the Slate, a bright beam latching onto the heavy metal bookcase, which then rattled against the edge of the tunnel like a shutter against a window."—let me show you first.""Sorry," Zelda muttered sheepishly, though her childish grin never faltered. No point taking this from her, Link decided, even if caution told him that there were likely to be anywhere between a handful to dozens of Cinelgen's people behind that bookcase. He hadn't heard anything as they'd approached the tunnel exit, but then again the entire Castle had been suspiciously silent so far.Zelda held the bookshelf steady, hands encased around the luminescent and ethereal horseshoe magnet that had formed around the Slate. Link mimed out the rest of the lesson for her. "Rotate the Slate this way to move things forward," he explained, spinning his hands to the right. He swapped his hands, adding: "And the other way to move things backwards.""How do I remember which is which?" Zelda whispered, gently turning the Slate to the right. She must have underestimated its power, for the bookshelf abruptly lurched forward in response, the gray-and-white tiled marble and wall-high bookshelves of the Library coming suddenly into view.Zelda yelped - half in delight and half in shock - and soon a cacophony of shouts and startled cries were echoing from within the Library."You just learn,” Link sighed, feeling his stance widen as he prepared to face whoever, or whatever, they would find beyond the threshold. Zelda hurriedly stowed the Slate back on her belt, hiding it once more under her tunic. Her hands went to the blue and white fabric fastened around her neck, adjusting the loose knot that held it in place."Shouldn't have let me do that," she reprimanded quietly, her posture straightening and her features hardening as she too readied to meet the interlopers."I could not have stopped you," Link shot back with a smile.Zelda ignored him, and stepped cautiously into the Library, with Link close behind, his heartbeat now thrumming in his ears.The Library was unchanged since the last time Link had seen it: old books and papers strewn every which way; bookshelves lining the walls and rising almost to the ceiling; the roof partially caved in, with three pairs of twin pillars holding up what remained; and the balconies overhead almost entirely collapsed, accessible only by a double flight of stone stairs at the back end of the room. Above them the night sky jutted into the Library through the ruined roof, and Link was half-sure the entire place was about to collapse.At the centre of the large hall, huddled around one of the wide, dark-wood desks that were scattered throughout, was a group of bandits. There were four of them, all armed and armoured, blue and white neckerchiefs around their necks; two Hylians attired in travelers' garb, one an older woman and the other a boy who could not be any older than twelve, a wide-set Zora male with freckled spiny fins, and a vaguely-familiar white and brown feathered Rito, with a hint of age about his plumage. The glimmer of recognition sent a jolt of unease through Link, but he managed to keep his face still. The bandits were eyeing the bookcase suspiciously, the cards strewn about their desk evident of a now-abandoned game. Zelda strode past the bookcase confidently and into the ruined Library, her long blonde braid swinging about her shoulders."Hello there," she said curtly as she approached the table. The group of bandits gaped at them silently, until the Rito finally spoke."Who are you?" he barked at them."Name's Rhea," Zelda announced. "This is my travel partner, Nell."Link followed her words with a short, two-finger wave. Casual and calm, though underneath his mask his blood was afire with a muted panic.If Zelda was feeling even a little the same, she did not show it. "Apologies to barge in. We got lost on the way from the Docks."The Rito narrowed his eyes, beak clicking with distrust. "Where're you from? You don't sound Hylian.""Eh-yeah, accent's funny," chuckled one of the Hylians, a rosy-cheeked woman with corn-coloured hair that was braided longer than Zelda's. The second Hylian, a wiry boy no older than ten, laughed nervously along with her.Zelda fought to maintain her composure. They hadn't had the time to create overly detailed backstories. "I - uh - I'm from-," she stammered."Necluda," Link said firmly. "Near Lantern Lake."Zelda turned to look at him, her eyes flickering with recognition: Kakariko Village."Yes," she affirmed. "If you must know, Nell and I are Sheikah defectors. Those uh...those traitors, have a unique accent.""Do they now?" the Rito asked ponderously. Link wanted to bury his face in his hands. "You don't look Sheikah.""You ever met a Sheikah, Yinli?" the Hylian woman goaded. Yinli bristled, clearly not fond of being challenged."No," he admitted reluctantly, pacing slowly towards Link and Zelda. Link spied a bulky Falcon bow at his back; this one appeared to be modified to fire multiple arrows simultaneously. Link felt his sword hand flex, and for the first time in days, or maybe weeks, a faint warmth from the Sword at his back, and fainter still, the hum of a long forgotten song. Yinli's eyes locked onto Link. "But I have met this boy."Link realised a little too late where he had seen this Rito: by the side of Chief Kaneli, elder of the Rito of Lake Totori. Link had stood before them after he had freed Divine Beast Vah Medoh, wearing the same sword that he wore now.Link inhaled slowly, his back stiffening. "...shit."He glanced over to Zelda, and mouthed a single, urging word: run.Whip-like, the tension in the room broke. Link drew his sword, lurching forward toward the Rito. Yinli dodged, wings propelling him into the air.“Champion and his little mage!” Yinli cried out, taunting them. “The Chief will be glad the trap worked!” He landed atop one of the balconies, his bow ready. “Kill the girl but leave the boy!” Frantically scanning the room to find her, Link saw Zelda dive behind one of the enormous stone pillars, her light-shield raised as she dodged arrow fire from the Rito. She was quick now, he realised proudly, and refocused just in time to catch the butt of a silver spear, which the Zora had been swinging towards Link. Pivoting through the thrust, Link grabbed a hold of the spear and wrenched the silverite weapon from its wielder. The Zora cried out, stumbled, thrown off-balance under the sudden jolt. Not a movement out of place, Link spun the spear around and slammed the butt hard across his opponent's face. He heard the metal crunch savagely against bone, and the Zora fell limp against the Library floor.From the staircase came a familiar scream, and Link's blood ran cold, the spear suddenly dropped and forgotten. His legs were carrying him in the direction of the stairwell, the panic noose-like around his neck. Zelda was scrambling up the stairs with a flying Yinli in hot pursuit, arrows splintering against the stone around her feet. She spun around, firing a lance of energy at the still airborne Rito. It caught his foot and he recoiled, his flight disrupted and wings flailing.Not a moment to waste. Link drew his crossbow and aimed a bolt at Yinli; he breathed in slowly, feeling his pupils dilate and the hair on his arms rise. The song was in his ears then, loud and clear. He fired.The bolt tore through Yinli's chest, piercing just below the white and blue neckerchief. The Rito crashed heavily to the Library floor, and when Link let himself exhale, he saw that Zelda was crouching atop the first flight of stairs, fingers rigidly gripping the crumbling railing, her face written with shock.He wasn't able to look her way for long; a great weight suddenly bowled him over, and Link found himself sprawled against the ground, sword out of reach, with the Hylian woman's weight crushing his torso, her hands throttling him. He choked and kicked, nails raking ineffectively against her gloved hands. They want me alive! Link wanted to scream at the woman, but the words were wisps caught in his strangled throat. He tried to throw her off, lurching his weight sideways, but the woman was heavy and held her weight against his chest. Through the mayhem, Link noticed that her breath stunk of stale bitterness and that her cheeks were not naturally rosy, but flushed bright red - the telltale signs of a drunk. He wondered if Zelda's cheeks looked any different.Focus, boy! It was Otra's voice he heard then, and as his consciousness faded Link remembered that he knew how to get himself out of this.He hooked a hand around the woman's arm, and dug the fingers of his free hand into her neck. She lurched backwards, and Link used the opening to hook his legs up under her chest and kick her off of him. Winded and hacking but free, Link gasped desperately for air, feeling as though his lungs were about to burst. He scrambled to his feet, a hand already on the hilt of his sword. The woman had recovered and was in pursuit, her Demon Carver held aloft in preparation for an overhead blow. Spinning around to face her, Link drew the Sword, parrying an aggressive strike with his blade. The steel sung, but the woman was not deterred. She pressed forward, swinging wildly, and suddenly Link saw sky and stars as he toppled over backwards, tripping on a pile of books.And then, almost as fiercely as she had tackled him, the woman was slammed sideways against one of the bookshelves by some great metallic monolith. A bookcase! Link saw that on the stairs above him, Zelda was holding the Sheikah Slate. A glimmering horseshoe magnet was encased in her hands, an equally brilliant smile on her face.The sound of boots against stone brought him back to the present; behind him, the young Hylian boy was making a mad dash for the Library entrance, no doubt to warn the rest of the Castle of Link and Zelda's presence.No time to think. "Zelda!" Link called out, his voice hoarse and strained. "Remote bomb!"Zelda frantically tapped the Sheikah Slate, eventually managing to clumsily pull from it a round Remote Bomb. With all her strength, she tossed the bomb to Link. He caught it by its small circular handle, before pivoting and lobbing it at the entrance in a single, fluid motion. The luminescent sphere arced through the air above the fleeing Hylian, and Link held a hand out behind him as he waited for the right moment. "Detonate on my word!" he called over his shoulder.Just as the bomb passed across the stone balcony above the entrance, Link closed his hand. "Now!" he shouted. Behind him, Zelda thrust the Sheikah Slate forward, and the bomb exploded into a sphere of light, sending stone and debris crashing down in front of the Library entrance. The young Hylian was thrown back by the explosion, and rolled along the tattered red carpets.Link was on him within moments, pinning the young man to the ground by the shoulders."Get off, get off me!" the boy cried, but Link held firm."You didn't see us," Link managed to rasp, his voice little more than a reedy whine."Get. Off!" the boy growled, squirming under Link's weight to no avail."Say you didn't see us!" Link demanded, more power in his voice. The boy managed to wriggle an arm free, movements sporadic as he flailed and lashed out, sharp nails catching Link across the face. He responded by gripping the boy's wrists firmly, slamming him against the ground and pinning him. The boy was shrieking, squealing like a babe, and suddenly Link no longer had any patience.These damned bandits, so many of them, causing so much destruction, after all they had done to rebuild. He raised a fist, ready to unload all of his frustration and fury …Zelda grabbed his raised hand and wrenched it back. "Let him go, Link!"He ignored her, but withdrew his fist. Bracing an arm across the boy's chest and shifting his weight, Link held out a hand to Zelda."Rope," he commanded, wincing at the pain of speaking even such as short word.Zelda found him one among their inventory in the Slate, and Link bound the young Hylian hand and foot, dragging him over and securing him to one of the shattered pillars. He gagged the young boy with the blue neckerchief that had been tied around his neck."Sorry. We have no choice," Zelda apologised to the Hylian, who was glowering at them with a bristling rage. She pulled Link aside, a hand firm around his arm, eyes scolding. "What is wrong with you?" she reprimanded under her breath. "He's just a child."Link shrugged and pushed off from her, not wanting to be near Zelda while the anger still pulsed through him.As Zelda rechecked the Slate again for their next move through the Castle, Link gingerly brought his hands to his neck. The flesh was tender, and judging by the pain, would bruise badly. Deliberate and slow, Link inhaled, testing his breath and finding it laboured and harsh. Stupid woman, he thought as he looked over to the pie-eyed and flushed Hylian who had almost strangled him. She was unconscious, but probably still lived, and so had Link, thanks to Zelda's quick thinking with the Slate. The healing didn't take long; Link found that Mipha's healing flowed easily now, almost second nature, as though it were his own power and not a gift. It healed more than just the pain — bit by bit, he felt the anger receding too. When Link opened his eyes, Zelda was standing before him, patiently waiting with her hood drawn and the Slate in hand.“Hey,” he said to her."Ready to go?" Zelda asked, not noticing his fond smile, her face somehow even more marbled than it had been. Link caught himself, and nodded wordlessly, following Zelda out of the Library.Link blinked heavily as they emerged once more to the exterior of the Castle; the sun had broken past the east horizon, rays of low light bathing the ruined Castle cliffs in swaths of deep amber. They didn't have much more time; the higher the Sun climbed, the smaller their hope of sailing away from the Castle undetected. As it was, they had no hope of finding this Cinelgen now. Link couldn't shake the disappointment, or the newfound hunger that dwelled within him, amid the frenzy and the panic, for something a little like vengeance. He wasn't sure if anger suited him, but it beat cowardice, at least."Not far," Zelda assured him as they jogged through a tunnel that ran along the back of the Castle. Wide window-like breaches were carved into the stone, casting long shadows along their path. The tunnel opened to a faintly familiar courtyard, and overhead Link spied the tower of Zelda's study rising spear-like into the morning sky. For a moment he saw that she was gazing up at it as well, eyes heavy and yearning. We'll go back there, he wanted to tell her. One day soon.Passing under the tower's shadow, they hugged the courtyard walls to avoid being detected by two patrolling guards, and descended via a hidden walkway down into the remains of a storage cellar."Oh, no, what happened?!" Zelda cried beside him once they entered the room."Where are the stairs?!"Link peered over the balcony at the centre of the room; it towered above a near hundred-foot drop down to the empty cellar below. There were large planks of splintered and rotting wood snaking their way down on the stone walls, the dilapidated remains of the destroyed staircase."We need to get down there?" Link ventured.Zelda nodded, her brows furrowed in frustration. "The entrance to the lockup is next to the storage cellar.""Only one way then," Link concluded. Zelda squinted at him, and in explanation he made an arcing motion with his arm, accompanied by a low whistle.Zelda shook her head emphatically. "No. Absolutely not.""We have a paraglider.""Are you insane?"Link quirked a brow, folding his arms at his chest. "You've asked me that before,"She just seethed at him, but then her features begrudgingly relaxed. She looked back to the cellar entrance, at at the rapidly brightening morning light. "We don't have time to climb down. So...I suppose you're right."Link could barely hide his eager grin as he unhooked the paraglider from his belt. He knelt down by the balcony's edge."Make sure you hold on tight," he cautioned. Gingerly, Zelda wrapped her arms under his and around his shoulders, and then her legs around his waist."Make sure you don't kill us," she said as she settled herself against him. Link paused, steadying himself at the balcony edge, taking a second selfish moment to savour her warmth.And then he leapt forward. He heard Zelda gasp, a quick surprised intake of air, as the wind rushed past his ears and his stomach flew towards his chest. The stone floor below was rocketing up to meet them, and Link grabbed his paraglider and let it unfurl above them. The whiplash of the sudden stop caused Zelda's legs to give way, and she shrieked, her arms wrapped tightly around his chest, constricting him. Link let out an emphatic groan, coughing and spluttering against the sudden pressure."Link!" she cried, fingers scrabbling at him, seeking purchase against his woolen doublet."Just hold on," he managed. "Don't let go."Thankfully despite their foolhardy jump, they floated swiftly down to the cellar floor, and touching down, Link gasped for air as Zelda finally let go. Zelda was in front of him instantaneously, one hand on his shoulder and the other gingerly touching his neck."Oh, Hylia, I'm sorry," she was apologising. "Did I hurt you?""No, no," Link said, letting out a laugh. "It's fine really. Just a shock."Her fingers were gently probing his neck, scrutinizing for any damage, eyes on him like he was a specimen. Link watched her contently, happy to be doted on, and realised a moment too late that he'd absentmindedly placed a hand at her waist.In unison, the pair noticed their closeness, springing apart."Let's keep moving," Zelda muttered, hand flying up to fiddle with her hair and readjust her braid. She made for the cellar exit."Wait, Zelda," Link called to her. "When are we gonna talk about what happened?"Zelda stopped in her tracks, though she did not turn to look."Depends," she said cooly. "A lot happened."Link huffed, his patience thin. "With us.""There’s nothing to talk about," She began walking once more for the exit. "We haven't the time for this now.""Hey, c'mon. Don't do this." Link jogged slightly, catching up to her. He reached out to her, intertwining their hands, but Zelda wrenched herself free, scowling at him in disgust."Link, honestly!" she snapped.Link opened his mouth to argue back, but found his words caught in his throat. Why was she being like this? "You know, I thought you liked me,” he frowned.Zelda exhaled, equally impatient. "What are you even talking about?"He couldn't explain it to her in full; how he had met a bard named Kass, and how the Rito had sung Link the song of his final moments. The Princess' love for her fallen knight awakens her power…and within the castle the Calamity is forced to cower."I heard that, before..." The words were unfathomable, but he needed to know. "That you loved me."She was incredulous. "I loved — who told you that?""A bard, alright - look, it doesn't matter." Link struggled to find the words, to wrangle his disparate thoughts into the question that had plagued him since he'd met her - suddenly unsure if he even wanted to know the answer at all. "I just wondered if it still meant something.""Meant something? Now?" Her voice was low, accusatory. As if he had any say in the charge. "Link, do you have any idea how different you are?""How am I different?""You just -- look, we don't have time for this!""Just answer me, please! Just this one thing!" he was desperate, somehow knowing that if he didn't make her speak now, she never would."Fine! You are different!" Zelda blurted out. "I didn't expect you to be this angry. Or...indecisive. I thought after a while you'd be...mostly the same." Link could see the quiet disappointment on her face, and every word she spoke was a barb in his chest.Indecisive. Another word for cowardly. His spirits sank and then, seized by a terrible understanding, he backed away from her."Wait...you...you liked me better before, didn't you? When I was...""What if I did?" Zelda countered remorselessly. "That Link wouldn't have left me. That Link wouldn't have almost beaten a child!""That Link barely spoke! He never argued with you. He wasn't much more than a servant!"How can you say that? You...you have no idea who he was.""Of course I don't!" Link shouted. "I never met him! And you know what!? That idiot also had a family, and friends, and a home. Right now I only have you, Zelda, so we have to talk about what happened."She placed a pacifying hand on his shoulder. "I'm sorry," was all she said, eyes appraising him with regret. Link realised she wasn't seeing him; but rather an echo, a shadow, the lingering ghost of a dead man. She dropped her gaze. "What happened. It never should have."Zelda gave his shoulder an apologetic squeeze, and turned towards the exit, leaving him there; alone and heartbroken and without any choice but to follow.There were three guards at the Lockup, all Hylian, and all hypervigilant for any intruders. They accosted Link and Zelda the moment they saw them, demanding they state their names and purpose, but received no answer. Link disarmed them all, and aided by Zelda's light shield, herded them into a cell."The Chief will know of this!" one of the guards spat."I hope he does," Link told them dryly.Zelda was already on the other side of the dark and damp Lockup, kneeling by one of the cells with her hands through the bars. Most of the other cells were empty, except one Hylian that was passed out in one and stinking of alcohol - probably just a drunk – and another with three Rito, who seemed dazed and did not react to Link’s presence. What the hell is happening here? Did they have time to free these prisoners? Approaching the far cell, Link sighed with relief when he saw the cerulean-scaled Ambassador huddled on the cell floor, her webbed hands in Zelda's."We're going to get you out of here," Zelda reassured their friend, and Larella nodded silently. Her face was tinged pink and swollen from what Link guessed - and hoped - were tears. He noticed with some detachment however that all of her jewels were gone. She'd had a new set made when she'd become Ambassador, he remembered Zelda telling him. A Zora's jewels were an extension of their purpose, their soul.Larella motioned to the Sword at Link's back. "Are you here to kill Cinelgen as well?"Both Hylians were taken aback by the Zora woman's frank words, however her calm features told that she meant no jape. What did they do to you? Link wondered, feeling the hairs on the back of his neck tingle, and the Sword at his back hum with heat."Our priority is you, Larella," Zelda told her, and Link saw Larella's face fall. He heaved his full weight onto the large mechanical lever that held her cell closed, and slowly the door opened. The other prisoners did not react to her freedom, something which unsettled Link greatly, though he wasn’t sure what to make of it.He returned to Larella's cell, and offered her a hand. "Can you walk?""Of course, Champion." Larella managed a weak simper. "I am unhurt."The Ambassador rose to her feet, and Link saw the bruises around her wrists and along her arms. He decided to ignore her lie. Most likely it is nicer than the truth."You weren't exposed to any Malice were you?" Link asked, remembering the illness that had gripped Sidon, and Zelda's theory that the Zora were susceptible to it.Stepping from the cell, the Ambassador shook her head. "Thankfully, no."Zelda returned to them with Slate in hand, a concerned look on her face. "Our only way out is either through the collapsed tunnel, or the West Passage, and we would need to swim across Hyrule Moat if we go that way."They made the less terrible of the two choices, and walked to the entrance of the tunnel, ignoring the aggravated shouts of the Hylian guards behind them. As it had appeared from the outside, the tunnel was completely caved in. Upon further inspection, it seemed as though it had been deliberately destroyed. Link ran a hand along the rubble and rocks that blocked their way."Only one way then," Zelda said. She lifted her tunic to reveal the Sheikah Slate, and pulled a gleaming square Remote Bomb from the screen. Behind them Larella gasped, startling back. "Careful!"Link shook his head at the idea. "No. It'll be too loud and take too long."Ruefully, Zelda returned the bomb to the slate. "What do you propose then, Hero? We dig our way out?"Link winced at the nickname, no longer a jest but an insult. "The West Passage is safer. If we try to leave this way the entire Castle will hear us.""And what if the West Passage is teeming with Cinelgen's men? How will we get out that way?"Link breathed a long sigh. He pointed to his sword hilt. "You know how.""No, I'm not putting Larella at risk. I'm not putting you at risk—‘There was a choked gasp behind them, and Link and Zelda spun on their heels to see three Hylians standing behind them. Link recognised two of them immediately: the spear wielder Milagre, the Hylian named Inglis, whom he had felled with an arrow at the Sacred Grounds. Milagre had a steel dagger held to Larella's neck, and was grinning hungrily. Hiding in her shadow was the young boy Link had bound in the Library. Milagre ran a free hand through the boy's hair."Well done, little one, they were just where you said they'd be," she said warmly, and then she pushed the dagger closer against Larella's throat, her fierce gaze returning to Link and Zelda. "One move and she's dead."The three guards that Link had imprisoned had been released, and approached slowly, their swords drawn and their expressions hungry.Just as the Hylians closed in, Link realised that Zelda had intertwined her hand in his. Her eyes were full of fear, her fingers clasped tight against his, and it wasn't until the guards pried them apart that she let go.While the rest of the Castle remained mostly in disrepair, Zelda noticed that special care had been given to the Throne Room. Most notably, the shattered floor had been repaired - if somewhat poorly - by two dozen rows of long wooden planks that were crudely nailed together.The rest of the large circular room had been cleaned of debris left by the Calamity, though frankly little else had been done. These bandits inhabiting her Castle evidently cared little for the structure itself.Link and Zelda had been ushered into the Throne Room by Milagre and her assistant Inglis respectively, with the three accompanying guards at their back, all carrying longswords. While they wore no masks, their tightly-fitting crimson garb gave them away as Yiga.Even Milagre herself now wore the telltale Yiga clothes, though hers were black rather than red, and the long white scarf she wore about her neck was embroidered in deep blue thread - an inversion on the endemic neckerchiefs that Link and Zelda had seen. She must hold a special place among their ranks, Zelda mused as they walked her through the halls of her home.Inglis threw her against the wooden planks when they reached the Throne Room, and Milagre followed suit with Link. They had not been bound, but Milagre had confiscated Link's Sword and the Sheikah Slate while Inglis had taken the crossbow. Cautiously, Link and Zelda rose to their feet. The three guards brandished their weapons behind the pair, while Milagre pointed her own spear at Link's face. Strangely, Inglis carried no weapons - however Zelda remembered that he had been injured by Link at the Sacred Grounds not a few weeks prior. Perhaps he was still recovering."Cinna is eager to meet you again," Milagre said menacingly. "He'll be most impressed at the speed with which you reached Larella, and most pleased that you did not take her. Poor girl."Ambassador Larella had been unceremoniously returned to her cell, a small cut at her neck where Milagre's dagger had pressed against her scales. Zelda did not like to think what it was about the Zora woman in particular that pleased Cinelgen. Zelda glowered at the spear wielder, and the Sheikah Slate that the other woman now wore at her hip. Link was silent beside her; they exchanged a single, regretful glance.She gazed up at the raised balcony that held her father's throne, and at the Royal Crest looming behind it; a trio of triangles encircled by a repeated pattern of musical notes. A lullaby, Zelda thought sadly. One her mother used to sing.A smooth, booming voice suddenly filled the room, larger and more full-bodied than its owner, who revealed himself to them then."Hello, hello, hello…" Cinelgen said as he strode in through a side entrance, and up the circular stairwell to the throne. He carried an elaborately painted bow at his back, but otherwise his garb was plain, hardly suited to such a grand palace. "So good to see you here.""This is our home," Zelda argued."Is it now?" Cinelgen laughed. He sat down in her father's throne, laying the bow across his lap. "By what rights do you claim Hyrule, girl?""I am its Princess. Link is its Hero. By what rights do you claim it?"Cinelgen was non-plussed by her revelation. He crossed a long leg over his knee, and leant back against the red velvet of the throne."Because I can. Because no one else did. Where were you then, Princess, when my Successors marched into the Castle?"Zelda could not answer, only frown. Weeping myself away in Kakariko, that's where I was. Wasting Link's time. Wasting everyone's time.It was Link’s voice then that filled the room, coarse though it was. "Is this how you plan to rule?" he demanded. "Murder and kidnapping?""It is the only way to rule, Champion," Cinelgen said decisively. He looked back to Zelda. "If you really are the Princess, then I lay the blame at your feet, girl. One hundred years ago Hyrule was at peace. Now it's people are leaves in the wind, vulnerable and weak. So many of them have no place in this world.""Turning them against each other doesn't help!" Link countered. The tenacity in his voice, the strength in him, was enough to bolster Zelda as well."Link is right," she said. "How can you justify what you've done?""So that I can be their saviour," Cinelgen explained. He stood from the throne, and walked to the edge of the balcony, his painted bow in hand. "The people will fight, and fight, and tear themselves apart before they admit the truth - that they are the cause of their own misery.""You were the one to attack them!"Cinelgen shook his head, and clicked his teeth. "Perhaps I did, girl," he admitted. "But I did not send that envoy. I did not bar the Zora from Gerudo Town. And I did not declare war on the Gerudo - all I did was provide a little chaos, and we are where we are. Soon the Successors will rise as a stabilising force, and the people will have no choice but to crown me their King."Zelda scowled, absorbing his words. "That will never work. They will never accept you.""Why? Because I'm Gerudo?" Cinelgen bristled, angered by her words. "Because your Calamity once looked just like I do? I don't care. Right now, all I want is the boy, and the Slate.""No," Zelda shook her head. She fingered the clasp of her right glove.Cinelgen gripped the railing of the balcony. "Excuse me?""You can't have him. Or the Slate. Or any of it." Zelda said defiantly. She tore off her right glove, and turned the back of her hand towards him, revealing the glowing crest. "This is my Kingdom."Cinelgen saw the symbol on her hand, just like the one behind the throne, and drew back, struggling to hide the shock on his face."So it really is you,” he said, and then he grinned derisively. "The Princess of Hyrule, come again." He motioned down to his guards. "Kill her. And bring me the Champion."Snap! All in Cinelgen’s presence jolted into action; Milagre and Inglis and the trio of Yiga guards ready to attack, and Link and Zelda ready to fight, with Cinelgen watching from above.First, Zelda sensed the crossbow bolt aimed in her direction, and deflected it with a light barrier. Inglis, her captor, stumbled back in shock, frantically reaching for another bolt to load into the crossbow. He fumbled, and Zelda used the opening to rip the weapon and the bolt from his hand and quickly loaded the bolt as she had seen Link do so many times. Inglis swiped at her, but she leapt out of his reach, spinning around to fire a bolt into the guard behind them. It silted low but hit his leg, and he crumpled to the floor.There was a yelp from Link's direction, and Zelda glanced across to see him deftly disarm Milagre, bringing the butt of her spear hard across the woman's face. Then Inglis was on Zelda again, tackling her to the ground, the crossbow flying from her grip. Zelda placed both hands against Inglis' chest and, as hard as she could, she blasted him with a surge of energy. He was thrown back across the room, landing within a few feet of the crossbow. He still has the bolts. You cannot let him get it. Zelda scrambled along the rough wooden planks, mindful of her balance, and saw in her peripheral vision that Link had retrieved the Master Sword and the Slate from Milagre, who was out cold, lying against the wooden platform. He held the Slate and scabbard in one hand, and the Sword in the other, ready to face the remaining guards.Both Inglis and Zelda scrambled for the crossbow, but Zelda was closer, and managed to snatch it up first. She had no bolts, but she had her powers. Gripping the crossbow in her right hand, Zelda focused her energy into the very wood itself. She stood, loaded the string, and aiming it at Inglis, she fired.A bolt of energy - a real bolt, as if it were made for the crossbow - struck Inglis in the arm, and he wheeled away from her. There was a scream and a low groan to her right, and Zelda saw that Link had finished off the remaining two guards. Inglis was not defeated however, and he advanced once more, muscling against her and attempting to pry the crossbow from her grasp."Inglis! Get out of the way!" Cinelgen shouted from the throne. Zelda raised her eyes to see him nocking two arrows to his painted bow. Inglis pushed off of her, throwing Zelda to the ground. She stood, frozen in fear."No! Zelda!" It was Link. He was running to her, the Slate and Sword in hand. Above, Cinelgen's bowstring was drawn back.They met in the centre of the room, just in time for Link to catch the two arrows meant for her. They pierced his chest just above his heart, ripping through his doublet, and Link barrelled into her, sending them both tumbling precariously across the planks.Princess and Knight had landed in a heap against the stone floor; Link half collapsed against her, winded by the two arrowheads that protruded from his chest, with Zelda gripping onto him so tight her fingers ached. Somehow, among the chaos, the Sword and Slate were still gripped in his hands.Out of shock or instinct or both, Zelda raised a hand towards their attacker.Larger than any other before it, almost as wide as the room itself, a gleaming barrier of light unfurled from her hand. Then, once she was sure she could hold it steady, Zelda looked down in horror to where Link lay at her side."No, no, Hylia, no..." she muttered frantically, bundling him up and holding him as tightly as she could with her free arm. "I'm here, I've got you."She was weeping then, though she did not know it. Her hand trembled, but she held it high, and the shimmering light never faltered. "I'm sorry, I'm so sorry. It's all my fault..."She closed her eyes, trying to find focus. We need to do something. We need to go! But how!? Slicing through the panic, Zelda felt something soft against her cheek. Gingerly, as though transgressing ten-thousand years of tradition, Link had raised a hand to her face, and was gently thumbing away her tears. Blood was flowering around the twin arrows in his chest, and his eyes were glassy, his skin pallored."I'll figure something out. Just stay with me," Zelda begged. "Please."Link smiled up at her."And here I thought you didn't like me anymore," he croaked, his voice barely more than a whisper. Zelda let out a laugh - a weak, exhausted simper - and her tears rolled freely down her cheeks as she held him close, pressing her forehead against his. For a moment, they were the only ones in the whole Castle, the barrier of light searing around them, protecting them from harm, alone but together in the terrifying world they had awoken to.Link exhaled, his eyes glazing over, his low breathing seeming to fade…"No, no, no, no," She was desperate now, in a horrible and hollow way. Not again! I can't lose you again!There was a thumping against her barrier, and Zelda looked up to see Cinelgen standing before her, repeatedly slamming his bow against the sheet of light. She gazed up at him, trying to comprehend, trying to find a way out, a way through….Her eyes flitted to the Royal Crest on her hand, glowing as brilliantly as the sun, somehow both a part of her and separate. Separate.Zelda closed her eyes. Link was squirming, shifting in her grip, and she had little time. Casting her mind back, Zelda thought on all the instances that she had used her powers. The Cleansing Rituals, crafting the crossbow bolts for Link, surging her power into the Malice - and the way she had always felt separate in those moments. As though she went to...some other place.Was that it? Could her powers send them across space in the same way the Sheikah Slate could? She had no other ideas but to try — to beg the ancient power within her to save them. Zelda opened her eyes to look up at Cinelgen again, this time resolute, unbreaking."Hold still," Zelda whispered to Link. “I’ve got you and I’m not letting go. We’re getting out of here, okay? This time I’ll save us both.”Link shifted again, pushing off with surprising strength and rolling away from her. She tried to reach for him but he was too quick. Then she looked down, and saw that he'd laid the Master Sword and Sheikah Slate across her lap.Faintly, the realisation too slow or perhaps too quick, she noticed that he'd opened the teleport function on the Slate."Have courage, Zel," he rasped, a small smile on his face. "I'll see you soon.""No, wait-!"He was too fast. Before Zelda could move, Link swiped a finger across the Slate, activating the teleport. Zelda's barrier dropped."Link!" She screamed, but the shining light was already surrounding her, pulling her through. Taking her away and leaving Link behind. "No! Li-"His name died on her lips as the world became a shimmering canvas of blue and white.***Inglis watched with gaping mouth as the girl named Zelda disappeared in long slithers of sapphire light, leaving the Champion prostrate on the floor. Link hacked and coughed, but somehow, he stood, eyes unsmiling as he looked up at Cinelgen. The arrows were still embedded in his chest, a widening bloodstain covering the left side of his dark doublet."What just happened!?" Cinelgen shouted down at him."You got me," The Champion said, his voice haggard. He winced as he reached up to snap the arrow shafts that protruded from his back. "But I couldn't let you have her.""Where is the Slate?" Cinna demanded. The Champion shrugged, his lips curled into a smirk."She is going to be so mad," he said, more to himself than anyone else. And then he doubled over, falling to his knees as his strength left him."Where is it!?" Cinelgen bellowed."The Princess has it," the Champion spat. "And now you'll never find her."Cinelgen stormed foward, wrapping his hands around the scruff of the Champion's doublet, pulling him back upright, snarling in his face. "I will have that Slate. Finding and killing one girl will be easy."The Champion just laughed. "Good luck, she won’t make it easy for you.”Inglis found himself wincing as Cinelgen brought his fist hard across the Champion's face; once, twice, three times, again and again until his anger was spent.The Champion coughed blood, and collapsed against the floor."Take him to a healer!" Cinelgen barked, turning to storm from the Throne Room. "And then throw him in the cells."***Zelda opened her eyes to another wall of white, winded by the suddenness of the freezing air around her. She took a breath and gasped as it stung her lungs. White underneath, white all around, falling from the sky and landing in her hair. Snow! A blizzard!Against the cold she felt another thrum of pain. Link! Oh, Hylia, Link…where did you send me?There was a pulsating blue light around her, and Zelda realised she had landed at the entrance of a shrine. Splayed out in front of her and gathering snow, she found the Sheikah Slate and the Master Sword. Zelda gripped the Slate, trying to tap the screen and orient herself, but her bare fingers were too shaky to even turn it on. Cold pragmatism filled her. I need to find shelter. Squinting through the storm, Zelda spied a small wavering flame in the distance, perhaps a few hundred metres away. She clambered to her feet, the Slate and the Sword clutched close, and stumbled out into the thick snow. As she ambled forward, her focus on her footsteps was drawn skywards by an iridescent and ethereal light.The beast soared through the air, verdant body gliding effortlessly, its ancient eyes paying the world below no mind - a great green dragon, the guardian spirit Farosh.
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
Kass,
I trust this letter finds you well. I haven't decided where to send it yet. Probably Riverside Stable, I know you like that one. Thing is, I need your advice and I need it soon, and I can't wait around for you to head back to wherever this letter ends up.
But what can I do?
Our people have started going missing. Some for only a day or two. They usually say that they just went off to hunt, or practise their archery on some bokoblins or something. The first I noticed was Rylen, one of the younger guys. And then there was Yinli, you know him. The older falcon that advises Chief Kaneli.
Then there are the couriers. Cooler months are usually busier for them. People don’t want to travel, so they send letters. But I haven’t heard from at least three of our flyers in nearly a whole month. These aren't guys who should be disappearing, Kass.
A few days back, I couldn't find Saki for a few hours and I was so mad... I regret what I said to her, but she's talking to me again so there's that.
I bet you saw the attack on Hyrule Castle. I was taking Tulin over to the Flight Range when it happened. Nearly knocked us both out of the sky. So much power, Kass, right on our doorstep too. And it looks like Vah Medoh is camped with us for now. Saki thinks the Divine Beast is something we should be proud of, but I'm not so sure. My leg never fully healed from where that thing shot me. I get it - Calamity Ganon is gone. Our friend Link is probably living it up in Hyrule Castle right now because of that. But the Divine Beasts were still piloted by people at some point, right? What happens if they fall into the wrong hands?
I guess my point is, do you think I'm being paranoid? Because I really don't know anymore. Have you seen anything suspicious on the road?
I'm going to head up to Vah Medoh tomorrow to make sure it isn't awake. I just need to know. And if there are some rats in the village, I'll find them. I just hope I have the time.
Speaking of Link, let me know if you see him, or just tell him to pay us a visit. Kid won the fight of the century - I'll be damned if I don't hear about it.
Fly well,
Teba
***Inglis of Akkala dipped his face once again into the basin in his sleeping cell, the freezing water dispersing the last of his morning drowsiness. He raised his head to peer into the small mirror before him, and rubbed his eyes dry with the backs of his hands.I don't much like it here.It was his first thought of the day - of most days now, really. Hyrule Castle was not a friendly place, nor a terribly comfortable one. An oozing, poisonous corruption clung to almost every wing of the palace, and what hadn't been outright destroyed by the Calamity was crumbling and dilapidated. The Successors had attempted repairs to the structure, but they lacked the resources - or indeed the skill - needed to make any real progress. That is the way of things, when your numbers are made up of outcasts, bandits, former assassins, and fools.Inglis wasn't sure which of the four he fit best. He had grown up in Akkala, in a tiny village not far from the stables. His father had tilled the fields with his pockmarked hands and had sung chanting hymns by the hearth fire. His mother had hands ever raw and tinged pink, and for as long as Inglis could remember her, her hair had been pushing grey. They had lived in a hut with only one room and a pantry that was rarely full. Maybe it had been a hard life, but Inglis had been content, in a simple and ignorant way.And then at the age of sixteen, his family's hut was raided by a group of newly-bladed Yiga. The clan members had sought blood and conquest, and of course found it among the defenseless. Inglis had fought tenaciously, wielding little more than a knife, and a desperate, flailing desire to live; but the Yiga cut him down all the same, before putting the torch to the entire village.That was where Cinelgen had found him: bleeding out in the rain, the hut up in smoke and his parents both slaughtered. Cinna patched Inglis up, bound his wounds, and took him to the stables to recuperate. He taught Inglis to swallow his grief and turn it into strength, the better to one day help him destroy the clan that had razed the village to the ground. A year and a half Inglis and Cinna spent on the road after that day, together with Cinnna's band of outcasts. Inglis wasn't sure what to make of the Gerudo male - he never hid what he was, yet somehow Cinna's heritage went completely ignored. Innkeepers and merchants gave Cinna nervous sideways looks, but did not turn down his coin. It was the Yiga weapon - the painted Duplex bow capable of loosing two arrows simultaneously - that made them skittish. Cinna had claimed to have stolen it, but Inglis knew the truth.Almost two years ago it was now, Inglis realised, two years since the day that Cinna had saved him. Nights under the stars, jokes while they walked, and sword practice by dusk. "My dear Inglis!" Cinna would laugh after their practice, cuffing him on the back with a lung-thumping palm. "Who could ask for a better squire?"Inglis had worshipped Cinna in those days, awestruck that a Gerudo male outcast - and a Yiga deserter - could walk through the world with such confidence and ease.But that was then. Before the Champion, before the cavern, before the destiny that Cinelgen had found deep underground. Since then he had become consumed with the single-minded purpose of finding Link and the Slate that he carried. When Inglis had questioned why Cinna was so set upon this new path, his friend claimed that it had been his path all along."I just failed to see it, Inglis," Cinelgen had explained. And then he had sent Inglis to the Karusa Valley, to join the Yiga, and work to destroy them from within. "I know a woman there - Milagre. She is their Secretary. She will help you."To Cinna’s credit, she had. Inglis could only fathom going through with their plan because of her, because she made it sound so easy, so simple, so necessary. The first time Milagre of Karusa Valley had told him their plan to rid Hyrule of the Yiga and then take control of the castle at the centre of the world, Inglis somehow didn’t register the horror of what she was suggesting, so smooth and convincing were her words.And now they were here, in the decaying Hyrule Castle, with an army, hostages, and enemies. No longer boys at play but men at war. Their new regime didn't quite suit Inglis yet.Absentmindedly, Inglis rubbed at the burning sensation in his arm where that so-called Princess had blasted him. Zelda was her name. Mila called her a mage, one who could fire crossbow bolts made from sorcery. Thankfully, the bolt had only glanced off his arm, and strangely the wound was more akin to a burn than a scrape. Inglis shuddered when he recalled the glowing mark on that girl's hand, and was secretly glad that she was gone. Sighing and shivering from the morning chill, he left his room in search of breakfast.Inlis met Cinelgen in the half ruined Dining Hall and found him picking the meat off some boiled heron drumsticks. His friend barely raised his eyes from his meal when Inglis entered the room. Milagre was with him at the table, sharing the meal - the sight of her with Cinna sent a wave of jealousy through Inglis's young veins."Morning," Inglis said as he approached the table. Lips pursing, he added: "Milagre."His companions raised their heads in unison when they saw him; their terse, upward nods the only acknowledgement of his presence."Have you checked on the Champion this morning, Inglis?" Cinelgen inquired as he lazily gnawed on a bone. There had been a feast the night prior and judging by the array of plates and cups strewn about the table, the leftovers were plentiful. In his sour mood, Milagre and Cinna seemed like vultures on carrion, breaking their fast on the remainders of the feast."No - should I have?" Inglis hovered behind Milagre's chair, feeling strangely unwelcome. Cinelgen shrugged and returned his attention to the thinning drumstick in his hands.Cinna was hard to read these days - a cipher of a man with a solution as rare as he was. Was he gloating like a fool, or was he just putting on a show?Milagre turned in her chair to face Inglis then, chocolate hair framing her freckled cheeks. "You're already up, you may as well duck in to see him.""Of course," Inglis nodded, feeling like an abandoned bone discarded under a table. Ignoring his hunger, he retraced his steps out of the Dining Hall.As he trudged through the ruined hallways of the Castle, his thoughts turned towards the seemingly unbreakable will of their prisoner. Inglis had brought Link to the healer the morning prior as Cinelgen had ordered, to have the arrows intended for the mageling girl removed. And even after a beating and two arrows to the chest, the Champion had clambered again to his feet to follow willingly, if a little slowly.The only healer in the castle had been Coya, a Yiga acolyte. No, a former Yiga, Inglis reminded himself. The acolyte's hands had been wobbly as he'd patched up Link's wounds, and he'd muttered through fleshy lips that Link was lucky not to have caught the arrows with his heart. As Coya worked, the Champion barely winced. Bigger men, stronger men, would have cried and gnashed their teeth at the pain. But not the Champion - even when Coya clumsily wrenched the arrows free - all Inglis saw on Link's face was a muted, distant smile. As though he had been… proud to have been captured. More like he's proud to have spirited that girl away.Inglis made it to the damp and dreary Lockup, and hailed Link with a cold, "Aye, prisoner," as he approached his cell, not wanting to give him the dignity of a name.The Champion was propped up against the back wall of the cell, his head resting limply against the bricks. When his blue eyes lolled open, his breathing hitched as if he had been seized by a some terrible nightmare and was only just coming to. But the nightmare was not over, it seemed; soon Link was muttering feverishly to himself, fingers scrabbling against the floor of his cell, seeking purchase, seeking strength. "What did I say… what did I do…"Inglis turned to one of the guards, frowning. "How long has he been like this?""All night, and all morning too," the guard replied. "Mumbling questions and groaning to himself.""Open his cell, and get behind me," Inglis commanded, glad to at least be higher in station than someone at this Castle. The guards obeyed, and soon Inglis was kneeling before Link, whose muttering had not stopped."Tell me, what did I say… what did I say..."His face was swollen and badly bruised from Cinelgen's beating, the entire left side of his face overtaken by ugly pools of purple and yellow. His lips were cracked and tinged blue, drained of their colour by the cold. Inglis knew the tattered old shirt that Link had been given to replace his ruined doublet would not be warm enough for the winter, but there was little else to spare. Gingerly, he pulled open the left side of the shirt to examine Link's wounds, and was struck by a foul, acrid smell. Festering. He could be dead within weeks, or even days.Link's muttering continued. "What did I do...""You angered Cinelgen," Inglis answered, though he guessed his words went unheard. "Got yourself locked up in this hole, that's what you did. The worst place in the world."For a moment, Link's eyes met his, and in the watery pools of blue Inglis saw a flash of clarity - a calmness - that betrayed a full understanding of the situation. I know, his eyes said. But you're here too."Don't anger him again," Inglis warned. Link's only reply was a slow blink and a weak, woozy smile.Inglis sighed. He rose from the cell, pausing to instruct the guards to inform him if Link's condition worsened. In the cell across from Link, he spied the Zora woman. She was weeping softly, but paid him no mind. A few cells down where the other prisoners: a Hylian that’d angered Cinna with his drunken singing, and the trio of Rito couriers that had been foolish enough to enter the castle out of curiosity alone. Another two had arrived a week before, but Cinna simply had them dealt with, bemoaning having to feed so many prisoners…So much suffering, discomfort, and malice. It reminded Inglis of home, and not in a good way.Climbing the crumbling stairs and makeshift haphazard walkways nailed into the side of Hyrule Castle, Inglis set out for the Throne Room to report to Cinna. There he found the Chief sitting on his red velvet throne, his painted Duplex Bow within reach, and a soft pink Rito woman kneeling before him. Milagre was standing guard by the door, and Inglis silently joined her. He smiled at her, and she winked back, casual enough to seem inconspicuous, but coy enough to set Inglis's blood pumping."Tell my people at Lake Totori to look for a young Hylian woman, long blonde hair, carrying a Sheikah Slate, and a sword, and a crossbow," Cinna bellowed, his voice bouncing off the chamber walls. It was a voice he put on for such meetings, Inglis knew - to make himself sound like a ruler. "She has a mark on her right hand, just like the crest you see behind me. She is a mage, a powerful one. I want her dead, and I want that Divine Beast under our control.""Of course. Our work will continue," the Rito acknowledged, slender neck craned loftily up to the throne. "And if I may take my leave, sir; I must return home by evenfall."Cinna nodded, waving an idle hand in her direction. "I'm not fond of waiting," was all he said, his eyes now focused past the Rito - on Inglis himself.Inglis knew those green eyes well. But up on that throne, commandeering an army and seeking to control a kingdom, Cinelgen's presence seemed larger than his physical self. Larger than any man should be. Cinelgen shifted in the throne, reaching down to adjust his doublet. While Cinna's attention was momentarily elsewhere, Inglis felt Milagre wrap her pinky finger around his own. She let go the moment Cinna raised his eyes.Ayu, a self-assured Gerudo woman who wore no neckerchief, was also waiting in the wings for an audience. She was the one responsible for kidnapping the Zora Ambassador - the one to apparently lay the trap for Link and Zelda."Sav'otta, voevo Cinelgen," she hailed in the Gerudo tongue, sauntering into the centre of the room. Her heels tapped loudly against the wooden planks where the floor had been repaired, her gait slow and confident. "And what a fine morning it is.""You need not speak that language to me," Cinelgen returned, face drawn. "We are not Gerudo here.""Of course," Ayu nodded, slightly taken aback. Inglis saw her wobble on the planks as she shifted her weight. "Why distinguish ourselves? Is that not your goal? To unite us all?"Cinelgen ignored her posturing. "What do you want, Ayu?"Ayu hesitated, considering her words. Beside him, Inglis sensed Milagre shifting on the balls of her feet. She was passing her spear between her hands. Inglis clenched his fists in apprehension. Something's about to happen."I want to know what happens next. I killed the Zora King. I brought you the Ambassador, and now you have the Champion." The agitation in Ayu's low voice was clear, though Inglis could hear her straining to remain polite. "And yet I've been ignored. It's taken me two days just to gain an audience with you in this Castle."Cinelgen regarded her with a withdrawn, almost bored look, his slight frown hinting at displeasure - as he would look upon a lowly fly that had landed on his food. "You believe you deserve a reward?" he asked calmly."Recognition, voevo," Ayu answered. Cinelgen's jaw clenched as she slipped into the Gerudo tongue once more. He narrowed his eyes, his mild displeasure turning to disgust."The spy I placed among the Zora envoy - the one who freed you from your captivity - he tells me that you confessed to the Gerudo, telling them of your actions against the Zora. And not only that, you gave them my name. You told them who was really responsible for the attack on the Zora. Do you want recognition for that?""I had no choice! That… that Buliara would have killed me. She saw it all anyway. What does it matter?""What does it matter!?" Cinelgen snarled. "She is the most trusted advisor of the Chief of the Gerudo! And now she knows we led the attack!""She has no proof beyond her word!" Ayu countered. "What will one attack matter when all of Hyrule is at war? I led the Champion here! He and that Hylian girl knew you had taken the Castle, so I led them here! You cannot deny me that!""Yes, you took your monumental mistake and turned it into an opportunity." For a moment, Cinelgen seemed to relent, but then he leapt to the offensive. "You almost made us look like fools before the Rito, and I prevented that by claiming your stupidity was a trap. I can no longer trust you, and I can no longer risk letting your tongue wag again.""It will not, I assure you."Cinelgen took a deep breath, and reached for his Duplex bow. Casually, fingers working the string as he spoke, he nocked two arrows into the bow. "I am not willing to take that risk."Inglis was not quick enough to look away. Swift and sudden, Cinelgen loosed the arrows towards Ayu. The first found her chest, and the second her neck.Hushed gasps filled the throne room, rolling through the circular chamber like a wave against the shore. Ayu choked and spluttered, her lips mouthing silent words of fury and shock, and then she collapsed forward. The gasps and whispers began to die with her. Inglis gaped helplessly at the dying woman, caught between the twin feelings of pity and relief.Blood had begun slowly pooling around the Gerudo woman, seeping through the gaps in the wood and dripping into the deep cavern below. Cinelgen called for someone to take the body away.Thankfully there were two Yiga stewards (former Yiga, Inglis caught himself again) in the wings who were eager to stay on Cinelgen's good side. They ducked across the planks, and began unceremoniously dragging Ayu away.The deed done, Cinelgen decided that he was done giving audience for the day, announcing to those remaining in the throne room that he wanted them out of his sight. Even if there had been others waiting for an audience, Inglis privately thought it unlikely that they'd show themselves now.Milagre silently breezed out of the room, and Inglis filed out after her. He followed her down the stone steps to the courtyard beyond the throne room, and then to the left as they made for the East Passage."Are you okay?" Inglis asked as they walked. "That was…a bit intense."Milagre just shrugged. "Cinna and I agreed that it was necessary."Inglis furrowed his brow, unsure in his defiance: "Was it?"They stopped by one of the ruined Gatehouses. The wind was whistling through the crumbling bricks, singing the song of the Castle's destruction. Milagre placed a warm hand on his arm. "Sweet Inglis," she said softly. "Don't you trust him?""Of course I do," Inglis said defensively. Perhaps not as much as you, though. Mila had known Cinna much longer than Inglis had, after all. The two had been Yiga stewards together, Inglis recalled, and then Acolytes, and had even become bladed in the same year, shortly before Cinna had run away. How much more have you been to each other? Inglis thought bitterly.Mila gave his arm a squeeze. "Then you don't need to worry. Cinna is in control.""I know that," Inglis said firmly. "I just didn't expect this much.…"Mila anticipated his concern. "Violence? Inglis. That is just the way of things now." She gave him a warm, placating smile. "Why don't you go talk to him? You know Cinna. He'll want someone to tell him he did the right thing, and you're his friend."Inglis nodded, conceding. Squires didn't argue with their knights.Milagre's eyes passed briefly up towards the Throne Room. Seeing that they were not being watched, she gave Inglis a quick kiss. It almost was enough to dissolve his lingering anxiety; to put right the worry in his mind. Inglis caught her, and kissed her back, but Mila wriggled from his grip and continued down the path."Go talk to Cinna," she called over her shoulder. "Everything is going to be fine."After he watched Mila go, Inglis begrudgingly turned back towards the Throne Room, readying himself to speak with his friend who had so suddenly become a king.***Teba rose before sunrise, as he did every morning. The Rito warrior rolled swiftly and purposefully out of his bed, planting his talons against the wooden floor of his hut, and allowed himself a single sleepy moment to yawn and stretch. And then the day began.Saki was murmuring in her sleep. "Don't push him too hard…" and then she rolled over, soft feathers shifting gently. Teba ran his wingtips across her face, and gave her a quick peck before going to wake their son.Tulin was almost twelve now. He would hit his growth spurt soon - or at least Teba hoped. But the boy had always been small, even for a fledgeling, and he showed no great skill at archery or flying. He was perfectly average - a normal child. Hardly what the son of a Rito Warrior should be. And Teba couldn't truly admit how much that bothered him.Teba and Tulin flew together to the Flight Range, as they did every morning. In the east, the sun was just beginning to rise, its warm rays cutting through the powdery morning snow. Winter's Welcome was soon, perhaps only a few days away. In his hollow bones Teba knew it would be a long one; this year's autumn had been short and the summer long. All the more reason to train harder - to push Tulin to be the warrior he was born to be, and to solve the mystery that plagued Teba and robbed him of his sleep.First it was Rylen, and then Yinli, and now countless other Rito - here one day and gone the next, and then here again. Even Saki had given Teba reason to worry. Oh, I was just visiting the Stables, she'd said. I'm sorry I worried you.Now Yinli hadn't returned, and his sons, Yorta and Yehoon, were squabbling like crows over his possessions. Who will get his armour? Who will take the family bow - one of Falcon make, modified to fire three arrows at once? Not that it mattered; the Falcon bow and the armour had disappeared with the old bird. Yinli might not even be dead, yet his sons were circling his soul as though they were lowly vultures. Teba wondered what, if anything, he had to pass on to Tulin. A bow maybe, but would his son ever have any true use for it?"We'll start with stationary drills, and then move on to aerials, do you understand?" Teba instructed Tulin as they neared the Flight Range.Tulin was gazing at the glowing Shrine on the south side of the range canyon."Tulin!""Y—yes, Father," the boy stammered, flapping his wings faster to catch up."You need to focus. Tell me, what are we doing today?""I'm sorry, I'm sorry." The fledgeling gave the Shrine another chancing glance. "I just noticed that there are footprints leading from the Shrine."Footprints? That gave Teba pause. He usually prided himself on being observant of his surroundings - the change in the wind, the rustling of the trees, the movements of his brethren to and from Lake Totori. But he hadn't noticed the footprints as his son had.Teba followed Tulin's line of down sight to the Shrine; sure enough, a trail of footprints that was nearly obscured by the new snow led from the Shrine over to the Flight Range. The tracks appeared to be muddled halfway through, as though their maker had stumbled towards the range canyon.Teba scowled, feeling his feathers ruffle. "Stay close," he instructed, tone clipped. Tulin adjusted his flight path, angling into his father's slipstream. They pressed on towards the Flight Range.Teba had expected to find another one of his kind at the Range, even though the footprints Tulin had spied did not look Rito-made. Hylians - or indeed any of the other races - were rarely found in Hebra. The cold kept them away. And Hebra was as brutal as it was beautiful; Teba maintained the fire at the Range such that it burned around the clock for that very reason. Many a time before he had found a weary traveller by its side.He had not expected to find such an unprepared traveller, whose attire was completely unsuitable for the mountain climate. The girl was curled by the low fire, her nose and the fingers of her ungloved right hand frosted over with the first signs of frostbite. Her blonde hair was coiled in a long braid, the two amber earrings she wore would do nothing against the cold and her garb - plain red Hylian clothes - seemed barely warm enough for the mountains. And strangest of all, she carried nothing on her person except a small, bow-like contraption that was hooked to her belt. The girl's breathing was shallow, but she was alive.Teba knelt by the fire while Tulin looked on apprehensively. "Is she okay?" his son asked."No," Teba swept away the accumulated ash and threw some new logs onto the crackling embers. "Look closely. Tell me what you see."Tulin waddled slowly over to the Hylian and stood over her, his wide yellow eyes taking stock."Uhm… her nose, and her fingers. She has frostbite."The fire was beginning to rise, the new logs catching flame with some assistance from a gentle breeze stirred by Teba's wingtips. He allowed himself a moment to enjoy its warmth, and then returned to stoking the flames."A simple observation. Look further.""She's lost her right glove. Her left hand is gloved, so… And she scraped her knee, and her face. She fell. Maybe that's when she lost her glove.""Potentially. Anything else?"The girl began to stir feebly as Tulin spoke. "Father! Her right hand! It… it's glowing?""What? No it isn’t," Teba's attention was drawn from the fire. But his son was right; there on her right hand - multiple dimly-glowing triangles coming together to form a larger one. Another thing Teba had not noticed. Getting sloppy, he thought. The girl's eyes fluttered open."Warm yourself up, girl," Teba instructed. "You've been hurt, but we cannot move you to Rito Stables just yet.""Ri-Rito...," the girl croaked. "Rito Stables?""Yes. On the other side of the lake," Teba answered. "I'm guessing that's where you came from."The girl did not reply, or even seem to understand his words. Still drowsy; maybe addled from the cold. Let her wake up first. Teba watched as she held her hands out towards the flames, and sucked in air through her teeth. Tulin was stood beside her, gawking at her with unblinking eyes. It wasn't polite, but Tulin so rarely saw Hylians. And teaching the boy manners is Saki's job, not mine."It'll hurt to warm up, and you'll blister," Teba told the girl. "But it could have been worse. You got a reason for not wearing gloves up here of all places?"The girl opened her mouth to speak, but no words came. She pulled her right sleeve down over her hand, covering the glowing symbol. A mage, Teba noted. Never a good thing.Tulin had grown bored of staring, and made his way over to his storage chest to retrieve his training bow. It was a simple weapon, not a mechanical one like the traditional Rito bows - he didn't yet have the strength for the draw weight. Teba caught his gaze and gave him a short, surreptitious shake of the head. Not now. No time.Tulin sulkily lowered the bow, and returned it to the chest. When Teba returned his attention to the girl, but she had dozed off once again."Time to take you home then," he grumbled under his breath, and knelt to scoop her into his wings. She was surprisingly light; small even for a Hylian. Teba bundled her in close to his chest. He could not fly with her in his grip, and the walk back to Rito Stables would not be short. It would do the girl no good for her frostbite to get any worse. Judging by how ill-equipped she was for this place, he guessed she was already in enough trouble as it was. Mentally deliberating the quickest way back to the stables on foot, Teba stepped out into the snow."Tulin, return to the village on your own," he commanded, addressing his son over his shoulder."Yes, Father," Tulin called back, and with some clumsiness, he took wing and disappeared into the falling morning snow. Teba watched his son with some trepidation. Flight should come easier to him at this age, he brooded. Teba had been seven when he first took a bow to the air. Tulin hadn't managed that until he was almost ten.Teba exhaled, reorienting his focus. He needed to move quickly, and could not busy himself with intrusive thoughts, as important as his son's development was.The girl shivered as he walked to the Stables, but she did not rouse. Her breathing was slow and shallow, though the light from her hand did not dim. Teba examined it as he walked - three triangles together making up a fourth, as gold as the sun. He felt he'd seen them somewhere before… on a tunic, or on the hilt of a weapon? He knew Hylian clothes tended to favour geometric patterns, sometimes triangles, but not always…My memory used to be better, Teba reflected. Five years ago I'd have recognised it immediately.Worry was seeping into bones, as deep and as persistent as the morning chill. Perhaps this girl was connected to the disappearances. Perhaps she was a plant. How else would anyone, let alone a little Hylian woman, make it all the way to the Flight Range with no provisions and no armour? She had come from the Shrine, hadn't she? Teba had only met one person capable of travelling using those Shrines: the Champion-descendant named Link. Perhaps this girl knew him.Realisation struck him like lightning. The Sword. That's where he had seen the symbol - on the golden scabbard of the sword that Link had carried. The one with the winged crossguard and the diamond hilt. Teba never forgot a good weapon.This girl must know him then - though Teba had not found a Sheikah Slate on her. So how did she reach the Shrine?Who are you? He stared down at the sleeping girl as he walked, squinting down at her soft face.At last the horsehead effigy of the Rito Stables came into view; they were not far now. And still the girl had not woken. A bad sign. Teba increased his pace, taking stock of his weariness and pausing to roll his shoulders and shake out the ache in his wings. Even on a morning this cold and snowed under, the Stable was abuzz with activity. Horses neighed and stomped their hooves against the frosted straw; the smoke of a handful of fires and cooking pots wafted lazily into the sky, and travellers and stable hands alike moved purposefully around the stable tent. And lilting over the noise, strangely foreign against the domestic sounds - a soft and reedy waltz was being played on an accordion.Kass, Teba thought warmly. He's returned.Re-adjusting his hold on the girl, Teba approached the bard.The song stopped. "Teba? What are you doing?" The bard was eyeing him with confused suspicion, his gaze flitting between Teba and the girl."Good morning to you too, Kass," Teba drawled. He looked down at the Hylian in his wings and then back to Kass. WIth a short shrug: "She's alright, just a little frostbitten. Found her at the Range."Kass returned to his song, playing a little softer as they conversed. "Very kind of you to bring her here.""Not the first I've found. But I'm not sure what to make of her," Teba admitted, his voice low. He was glad to have Kass' accordion to mask his words. "She's got nothing on her, except a crossbow, and she's a mage by the looks of it.""Oh?" The bard's eyes widened. "A mage? What makes you so sure?"Teba nodded down to the girl hands, which were crossed at her chest. "The mark on her hand."Kass leaned in, squinting as he assessed the girl. And then his face dropped, his beak hanging open, and Teba saw the his entire body tense. His music stopped again."That symbol...," Kass murmured. And then he suddenly shouldered his accordion, and held out his wings."Teba. We cannot leave her here," he said urgently. "Give her to me."Teba drew back, wrapping his wings tighter about the girl. "Why? Who is she?""Someone very special, my friend." Kass frowned. "That she is here, in this state, does not bode well for anyone.""Well, wonderful," Teba grumbled, and he gingerly handed the girl into Kass' wings. She finally stirred then, her round green eyes opening slowly."Where… where am I?" she murmured."Safe," Kass told the girl, drawing her close against the feathers of his chest. He took a step towards Teba, and spoke in a harsh whisper. "Listen to me. Tell no one how you found her. I met her on my travels, and took her in as my student. We were caught in a storm and she was frostbitten.""You got my letter, didn't you?" Teba asked impatiently. He never liked not being in on a plan. "Do you think it has something to do with-?"Kass nodded curtly. "I'm certain. We will talk on this later. Return to the Range for now. I will take care of her."Teba watched as Kass carried the Hylian girl towards Rito Village. He took a deep breath, steadying himself, letting his rational side take over. It's just one girl. Yet Kass, despite being a bard, was not one for melodrama. Teba trusted his friend, and that trust left a lump in his throat.He scowled; worry was a weakness.Teba took one more moment of rest, and then he launched himself skyward, flying northwest across Lake Totori to return to the Flight Range as he knew he should. As he would have, had the morning been a normal one, and not the ominous herald of an uncertain and harsh winter that Teba knew it was.
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
Part Three: Detention
Elder Impa
Kakariko Village
5th District, West Necluda
15th day. Autumn’s Wane.
Sister,
Have you seen Wolf and Sparrow? Your letter said they were planning to visit Akkala and then come to Hateno. But no sign. Wolf’s house is empty. Townsfolk know nothing. That, or Symin really is that inept.
Zora and Gerudo apparently at war? Symin heard about it in town. No one leaving or entering Zora's Domain or Gerudo Town. We need luminous stone at the Lab, but all trade has stopped. Couldn’t even find a courier. Our usual guy is no where to be found. Have had to organise for this letter to go with a travelling trader and had to pay him double.
No word from Robbie. Sent him several (expensive!) letters. A little worried.
Apologies for sending encoded letter. Cannot be too safe. Write back!
Purah
—
Director Purah
Hateno Ancient Technology Laboratory, Hateno
1st District, East Necluda
2nd Day. Winter’s Welcome.
Dear Sister,
I have neither seen nor heard anything. Our wait continues. I have faith that whatever has happened, the children will persevere.
In the meantime I am sending two Sheikah Warriors to guard you at your lab. Be nice to them.
You sent me the unencoded letter, by the way. I find myself unsurprised.
Impa
Link's captors did not bind him, but they may as well have. The fever left him suspended between agony and ecstasy, between dream and memory, between fondness and regret.
I was thinking… this reminds me of the time we first met.
He could feel it all; the dirt under his fingernails, the sting where he had scratched too hard and made his fingers bleed, the throb in his chest where he’d been shot, as incessant and painful as the voices that swarmed his mind.
You've hurt yourself again. What was it this time, another Lynel?
Scrabble scrabble. The voices clawed at the inside of his skull. In a moment of clarity, Link raised a hand to his chest. It hurt so much that he felt separate from from it - as if annexed from his own flesh. Link spoke a princess’s name and called upon her healing power but nothing happened.
So I really am just a failure.
Inglis's brown eyes were before him then, his thin mouth scowling at the wounds. "You got yourself locked in this hole," he said. That wasn’t entirely true, Link had wanted to tell him, your friends put me here. But silence was too easy. And then Inglis was gone.
You were such a reckless child.
Link wanted to scream. He'd been alone with nothing but the pain, the guards, and the memories for what must have been days - the faded wisps of the past that wafted through his fingers like smoke. They brought him food but he barely ate. They gave him water but it barely passed his lips.
The Hero and the Princess, remember?
Fingers scratching against the ground. Skin rotting. The air, frozen, his breaths coalescing into clouds in front of his face. Winter? How could it be winter already? Last week it had been summer, the grass a verdant green and the sun burning bright above Hyrule Field, yielding to the right hand of a goddess painted in gold and white…"Zelda."Her name fell from his lips. He'd sent her away; he could grasp that much. He'd been bundled in her arms, bleeding out on the stone floor, and somewhere through his painful haze it had occurred to him just how strange it was that Yinli, a Rito advisor, would be among the bandits that had taken Hyrule Castle. He remembered thinking: why would an advisor tarry with bandits? Had something happened at Lake Totori?They'd been wayward thoughts, as though there wasn't anything else more pressing going on around him at the time. Link's lips curled into a smile as he recalled gazing upon the vast and blazing shield of light that Zelda had created during their encounter with Cinelgen in the throne room.In that moment he had realised, or perhaps remembered, just how powerful she was. Not just strong now, enough to hold her own in a fight thanks to his tutelage, but in possession of a full spirit and a great and terrible power that would keep her safe when he could not.And so to Hebra he had sent her; there was a thread to be pulled there, to unravel the meshwork of Cinelgen's plans. Perhaps with the Sword and the Slate, Zelda could find that thread. Maybe there she could continue what they had started, heal the Divine Beasts and bring peace that Hyrule needed. She'd have to.Even if it hurt to be without her. Even after everything that happened. Even if there was a chance he'd sent her to her death in the frozen mountains.No - he'd know. If she was… he'd just know.
I'm okay if you're okay.
It was raining. Patter patter against the mossy brick of the Lockup. Raining again, or raining still? The last time it had rained he'd kissed a princess. Maybe more than once. Rain was good, Link decided.It was raining when he'd held her too, he remembered. On the muddy path, among the trees, on the day of the Calamity.Zelda had fallen into his arms, weeping and inconsolable, and he remembered realising how small she was. Before then she'd been a tower, a soul unassailable. But when he’d held her, tried to soothe her, felt her shaking in his arms — he realised she was just a girl, just a child. Scared and lost, just like him.His previous duty compelled him to die for her if need be, but in that moment, he would have died for her no matter who they were, or what they were to each other.The sounds of barked orders and the accompanying slam of a cell door brought Link reluctantly back to the present. A tall Hylian guard was muscling the Zora Ambassador Larella back to her cell. She'd been taken away, Link recalled. And now here she was, returned, like a book on a shelf."No need to shove," Larella snapped at the guard after he threw her into the cell opposite Link's.Slighted, seething, the guard stormed into the cell and pushed the Ambassador up against the mossy wall. His hand seized her neck, and the other brought a dagger to the hollow under her chin."I'll do as I like, mackerel," the guard spat in her face. “I could silence you in an instant.”"You do that—“ Larella wheezed against the weight of his hand. "And Cinelgen will put you down like the dogs... I’ve seen what he does to his allies, what could he do to an enemy?"A blur of movement. Link wasn't lucid enough to parse it out, but heard the guard grunt and Larella yelp, and watched as the Ambassador was thrown against the floor of her cell. The tussle had left a cut against her neck where the guard's knife had been, and a thin line of glistening red blood was seeping down towards her collarbone.Shaken, incriminated, guard backed slowly away from the cell, passing a threatening look towards Link. You speak and you'll get the same, his harrowed eyes said, and then he fled. Moment of defiance over, Larella huddled against the wall of her cell, hands gingerly testing her tender neck. Link wanted to offer to help - to heal her - but couldn't bring himself to break another promise. Silence fell in the Lockup once more, and the voices returned.
You promised that you would not forget her.
Another memory, another princess. The last midsummer of his youth, before he had been a Champion, he had hiked up to the Domain with his heart in his throat, caught between a need to see the Zora Princess again and the gripping fear of what he might do to embarrass himself when he did.You're taller, again! Mipha had laughed when she met him on the rocks of a plateau near the Domain. I'll never understand it. They had been alone on the bluffs, the luminous rocks around them swathed in amber hues of the late afternoon. Mipha had healed him then, her crimson-webbed hand held above his own, the soft light taking away a graze on his palm. You climbed too fast, she'd scolded gently. I wanted to see you, he'd said without thinking. And when the healing was done, Link had seized Mipha's hand before she could pull away, bringing it to his lips. It’d been raining that day too.
You know… Perhaps we could spend some time together. Maybe you could spend the summer here? Like you used to…
Princesses, princesses - Link had known too many, and he'd only known two. He felt like an interloper, a doppelgänger; he'd stolen the life of one princess, and stolen the love of another.
Mipha, before you go…
Scrabbling at the floor again. More throbbing pain. Why couldn't he make it stop? Link gripped at his chest, whispering Mipha's name like a prayer, begging for her power to flow. But it would not, and when Link opened his eyes he saw Mipha's ethereal form before him, her shining yellow eyes watching patiently.
… I've been thinking about what you said.
The Zora Princess began to cry - large wet tears streaking down her cheeks, and pooling in her long-fingered hands. Link wanted to crawl over to her, to be there with her, reassure her. But she was just out of reach, and he could not summon the strength. Defeated, he tipped his head back against the mossy wall of his cell, and waited for the illusion to pass."I made you like this, didn't I, Mipha?" he said to the weeping princess. "But… what did I do? What did I say?"The crying suddenly stopped, and when Link blinked, Mipha was gone. It was Larella's soft voice that lilted through the bars of their prison."P-pardon?"By the fragile tone of her voice and the wet gleam of her cheeks, Link realised that it had been the Ambassador who had been weeping. Nothing, Link thought but did not say. Just remembering out loud. A second round of shouts echoed through the cells of the Lockup."Why didn't you tell us, Inglis!?" A woman's voice, frantic and accusatory. "He's no use to us dead!"Milagre. That was her name; she didn't seem to like Link and Zelda very much, given the number of times she had tried to kill them. The Yiga woman stormed into Link's cell once a guard had unlocked it, and proceeded to tear open his shirt. Hm. Perhaps she didn’t mind him."Did you hear what I said!?" She was scowling at him. "Are. You. In. Pain?"Link glared at her. Of course I am. Inglis was hovering behind them."You won't get anything from him, Mila, not aside from muttering," Inglis frowned. Milagre observed Link's festering wounds a second time, and shook her head, the waves in her hair swaying.She rose sharply, and abruptly yanked Link to his feet by his ragged collar. Meanwhile the Princess was still whispering into his ear;
If anyone ever tries to do you harm…
"We need to get him to Cinna," Milagre was saying. "Chief won't be happy that you let him get this bad, Inglis."
No matter when, or how bad the wound.
"I'm not a doctor, Mila," Inglis protested."Anyone would have noticed that he was dying."Link felt his legs moving, but wasn't sure who was giving them the orders. Then he was slipping in Milagre's grip, stumbling back towards the ground."Inglis - help me with him!"Begrudgingly, Inglis went to Link's side, throwing Link's arm over his neck and shouldering the older Hylian's weight."Just because I'm not some Gerudo mastermind..." he grumbled."We do not have time for this."Link couldn't stop himself from grinning. He'd heard this before. It bitter and broken love was anything, it was an argument. "You two are cute together," he said through his delirium. There came no answer beyond an exasperated huff from Milagre.Link bit his lip, and remained silent as the pair dragged him through the tunnels of Hyrule Castle.It was fresh bandages and coarser bee honey applied to his wounds that stopped the fever in the end. Link didn't know exactly why Mipha's power had left him, though he could make a guess; healing required a certain peacefulness of spirit, and an understanding of the pain. Link had neither.Cinelgen himself re-dressed the wounds, but not before banishing Milagre, Inglis and the Yiga acolyte healer Coya from the makeshift infirmary in what looked like an old wine cellar. Link was surprised to learn that Cinelgen was apparently a skilled healer, though no one bothered to stop and explain where he had learned the skill. Still, he was none too pleased to be taken from his breakfast to play nurse to his own prisoner.Fools! he muttered after his subordinates were gone. I’m surrounded by fools! Link felt no need to argue.The Gerudo sat opposite from him, a tray of wet bandages, honey, and soaking cloths balanced on his lap. His stern brows were furrowed as he worked, and Link noticed for the first time that Cinelgen's face was covered in long scars. Who were you? Link wondered, becoming curiously aware of the faint smell of cinnamon. Before you became their Chief?There were two guards in the room with them, as expected. On any other day Link could have taken on all three; planning and executing the attack would be as familiar and natural as flexing a muscle.But not today; not while his chest burned and not while the fever kept him in a permanent, pervasive haze. It would be weeks at least before he would be strong enough to attempt an escape - if Cinelgen would let him grow strong enough.The Gerudo dipped a soaking cloth in the honey on his tray with care, and began to speak in a gentle, soothing voice."We have heard many things about you, Link," he said. "Word of your exploits spread through Hyrule long before you rid this castle of Calamity Ganon. The people spoke of the boy in blue who brought them food and materials, delivered their messages, even defeated monsters on their behalf. Then they spoke of how you freed the Divine Beasts from Ganon, and whispered about the Sheikah Slate that you once carried. Your propensity for handiwork, for weapon craft, your unbreakable spirit."The soaking cloth stung fiercely against Link's skin, and he bit his lip to stop from crying out."What about my good looks?" he wheezed as another surge of pain flashed through his chest.Cinelgen ignored the taunt. "We would have liked for you to come willingly. I regret that we fought in Vah Ruta."Link's mind wandered back to his first meeting with Cinelgen, when the Gerudo and his bandits had attacked Divine Beast Vah Ruta. The incident had left Zelda badly wounded, and had incited the Zora to send that failed envoy into Gerudo Desert — that very moment was where things had changed for the worse."Why would I have done that?""It doesn't matter. You are here now, are you not? And we require your aid," There was a hint of chagrin in Cinelgen's voice, and not once for a moment did his focus stray from the honey and bandages."You want my help?" Link asked, unsure if he had heard clearly. “What, to rule Hyrule?”“I can manage that on my own. What we need is someone with experience with the Sheikah Technology. I know what you’re thinking. There are Sheikah researchers, and there are! But, well, being raised by the Yiga has left a bias against them in me. I doubt we would get along.”A crumb. Link tried to commit it to memory. Cinelgen was raised in the shadows of Karusa Valley with the Yiga. So did that mean he now led them?“That aside, there is research and there is application. You have seen the technology up close, used it to defeat an ultimate evil. We believe this technology should not just be studied. It must be tamed."Tamed? In his lingering delirium, Link could barely even guess what any of this meant. No matter what, he had no intention of handing the ancient Sheikah technology over to a usurper and his bandits."Why would I even help you?" He said.Cinelgen lowered the soaking cloth, and reached for a fresh set of bandages. "Because you have nowhere else to go," he answered as he focused on his task. "My people tell me that your Princess was planning on casting you aside - that once the pair of you had finished cleansing the Divine Beasts, she would send you to Goron City."Link stared blankly at his captor, open mouthed and blinking stupidly. "That makes no sense.""Ask the Ambassador. It was to her that Zelda spoke," Cinelgen countered. He was unravelling a bolt of the fine gauze. He shrugged, almost innocent. "I heard your lovers' quarrel, you know. Oh don’t look so shocked. We literally heard it, when you were ‘sneaking’ your way into this castle. Seems to me like your princess no longer cares for you""You don't know that," Link seethed. "You can't know that." A pointless denial; there was no quashing the truth.Cinelgen met his gaze, amd squared him up. A simple argument; "But I do, Champion. You asked her if she still loved you and did she say yes?"“Well—““Then it was a no.”Link was ready to leap from his chair, and in a futile display of rage strangle Cinelgen right there — but pain was roaring through his shoulder, and nausea broiling in his belly. He brought a hand to his face and tried with all his might to stay upright.As he prepared the bandages, Cinelgen spoke in a slow, sombre voice, as though telling the story by a fire."The legend goes that one hundred years ago, there was a talented swordsman and the princess he was appointed to guard. And he did, right up until the day of the Great Calamity. He died for her, and she tore down the heavens in response, laying him into a deep slumber and using a divine power to contain the Calamity to this very castle. Then, a century later, an unknown boy in blue shows up in Hyrule wielding a powerful sword and carrying the very technology that almost destroyed this Kingdom. Then rumours spread of a golden-haired girl at the boy’s side, just like in the legend, and well, it was easy to surmise who you two really were. That you got yourself so involved with the Gerudo and Zora made it easier to bring you here. All I want is to continue your legend. It would be a shame for you to fade into obscurity, after all, with no kingdom, no home, and no love from your Princess.”"I don't have to listen to this,” Link spat, and then he sprung to his feet after all. He'd had enough, and didn't care if running would be akin to suicide. Immediately the steel rang as the guards drew their weapons, and Link halted, hovering awkwardly above his Gerudo captor.Cinelgen looked up at him from his chair, unmoved."No, you don't. You don't even have the Slate anymore, which is what I truly needed." Cinelgen raised his hands and held out the bandages draped between them. "But you need those wounds dressed, and soon. Sit down, Link."Link looked at the two guards, their weapons still drawn and their muscles taut, and felt the aching weakness in his chest. He had no other option but to sit. Cinelgen returned to his task, leaning forward to wrap the bandages around Link's chest. Link could hear the Gerudo's breath, and smell the cinnamon on him once again."Think on this, Champion," Cinelgen said softly. "No matter what you feel and no matter what happened between you and this Princess, you are an outcast just like us. Robbed of a home. Given no direction in life. You became someone you never would have been, and she decided to remove you from her life before it became too painful."And then Cinelgen had finished up with the bandages, securing them with a small metal clasp. Link felt his skin begin to cool and his hands begin to shake. Was it rage, or grief, that had overcome him?He raised his eyes to meet Cinelgen's. "Why are you telling me all this?"“Like I said, we need your aid. In return, I can give you purpose in this purposeless Kingdom.”Cinelgen nodded to his guards. They ushered Link out of the infirmary, down a side passage through the Castle, out along the Eastern Passage. Looming at the end of the wide stone path was an octagonal structure of stone and iron; a Gatehouse that in a past life served as a sparring ring.The voice came like a gust of wind, rushing past him and catching the hairs on the nape of his neck.
You are too aggressive. You lunge without first reading your opponent. In a real fight that would get you killed.
His father's voice. Disapproving and stern. Almost angry. Link felt himself arguing back: It's not my fault that everyone else is slower than me.The voice again, furious this time: A knight is not a just weapon, Link. When will you learn that?Another memory. He wasn't sure if he could trust it. The fever had brought all kinds of visions, and the fever had not yet passed. But Link wanted desperately this one to be real. Hearing his father's voice again nearly made him stumble, the shock sending him reeling, desperate to grasp what little of himself was left.When he came to, Link found himself standing before the twin iron doors that led into the Gatehouse. He was flanked still by Cinelgen and the guards. Taking in the gargantuan building, Link noticed that the upper terraces and windows had been boarded over with the same planks that lined the floor of the throne room; the same oaken wood and the same poor workmanship.Before the guards opened the wrought iron door, Cinelgen placed a hand on Link's shoulder. "This one is good, Champion. The way they used to be." Link didn't understand.Gingerly, as if expecting retaliation, the guards pried open the doors. Harsh light flooded into the chamber, and but once it had receded, Link saw what Cinelgen had been hiding.He shuddered backwards in shock, stifling an instinctual scream.It sat in the centre of Gatehouse - its winding legs tucked neatly at its side and its cylindrical body pulsating in a slow, almost peaceful rhythm - a living Guardian.Link felt his legs pushing against the ground, launching him into a fleet-footed sprint. But Cinelgen's guards were behind him, and they caught him before he could even take two steps."Look upon it, Link," Cinelgen urged, his voice exultant. "Don't you see the opportunity we have before us? You alone can tame this beast. If we can control it, if we show the people of Hyrule that we have mastered that which destroyed their Kingdom, then who else but us can usher them into a new age?!"Mechanical gears whirred and spun, and the cylindrical head turned towards them in a single fluid motion. Its beady cyclops eye locked on to them, and it saw.***Kisses of snowflakes against her cheeks pulled Zelda from her slumber, although they turned quickly to bites and jabs. The cold was pervasive, gnawing: Winter's Welcome."Open your eyes."Is that my father's voice? It was almost as deep. But too warm, too smooth, too kind."I'm glad to see you safe, Princess," came the voice again.She felt soft feathers against her cheek, and the gentle rhythm of footfalls beneath her. But she was not walking. Someone was holding her close, carrying her. Above, she could see vanishing-point trunks of wintery pines.The figure above her was an array of azures and earthy browns, embellished with bursts of colour like a painter's palette. From her vantage point, he was wide-set and towering. Zelda felt the softness against her cheek again; a simple realisation - her protector was of the Rito tribe.For a fleeting moment the Rito above her spoke in the voice of an old friend.“We’re almost there, but don’t worry. Your dedication to remaining alive is quite impressive, Princess.”“Revali?" she mumbled as her eyes found focus. Zelda felt a rumble against her cheek as the Rito laughed. "I am no Champion.""Where am I?" she croaked."The better question is who are you, sparrow," said the Rito, smiling down at her. "Don't answer. The truth is a dangerous thing. Who would you be, if you were to be safe?"Safe? When had she ever been safe? Zelda gazed up at the Rito as she tried to find her words, and saw two crimson feathers rising out from behind his left eye, arcing out into the air. She almost wanted to reach up and pluck them."I don't know what you mean," was all she could manage.As her drowsiness faded, she became aware of a dull sensation of pain: her face, her knee, and another, deep in her chest. The third was an ache of a sudden absence - a meteoric hollow where he had once been. Someone between friend and adversary, between past and present, between loved one and love lost.This was what she’d wished for, wasn’t it? Time apart. She’d told Larella as much, thinking it might help Link clear his head, and later realised that she wanted it as much for herself as for him. Zelda cursed herself. Wishes were powerful omens, and she’d run afoul of this one.The Rito lowered her down against a mossy boulder flanked by snow-flecked pines. Zelda took a moment take in her surroundings; they were on a narrow island, mere feet from a cliff face that led down to a wide and shining lake below. Winter winds ruffled and whipped at the water, waves cutting fast and sharp across the surface like a dagger. And beyond, were the jagged edges and snow-blanketed slopes of a mountain range. The Rito, the lake, the mountains - Link had sent her to Hebra!The Rito knelt before her. He frowned down at her right hand - at the glowing Royal Crest. Embarrassed, scrutinised, Zelda pulled her sleeve down to cover it."Are you hurt?" the Rito asked, gentler than Zelda had been expecting.Zelda shook her head, ignoring the throbbing pain in her fingers and nose."Who are you?" she gave the Rito a hard look, determinedly studying his face. "You seem… familiar.""My name is Kass; I am a bard of the Rito of Lake Totori." His smooth voice and shapely eyes presented the guise of an earnest, almost fatherly air. "A pleasure to finally meet you.""Finally meet me…?" Zelda drew back, pressing herself into the stone behind her. "What are you talking about?" Her eyes flitted down to the Rito's neck; she saw no neckerchief, but felt no relief."The symbol on your hand," Kass said, his voice low and urgent. "It can only mean…"She looked at him with wide, disbelieving eyes, hands seeking purchase against the rock at her back, seeking stability in a world that was closing in around her. "You know who I am, don't you?""Why are you afraid?" Kass asked, sensing her panic. "What happened to you?"She wanted to scream, to run, even if she had nowhere to go. She hadn't expected to be recognised so soon, or at all. But of course she would be. How many other Hylian girls bore the Royal Crest on their flesh?"Nothing. Nothing!" Zelda couldn't answer; couldn't risk a single word in case this Rito was one of Cinelgen's.The bard had her trapped at the edge of the island. Using her magic would only give her away. Her hand went to her hip, and she realised she no longer had the Sheikah Slate. Or the Sword. Or anything - aside from Link's crossbow hooked to her belt, of all possible things, and even then she had no bolts.The next thing she knew, the Rito was reaching for an accordion strapped to his side. Wait — an accordion? Zelda was too perplexed by what she saw to consider it a threat, and she sat there frozen on the ground."I believe I have a song to remedy this misunderstanding," he said softly, standing and turning towards the lake. Zelda was dumbfounded; what kind of captor serenaded his prisoner?The melody that Kass played was simple and lilting, almost a waltz, but sweeter. Zelda spied a rope bridge not far from where she huddled. Could she outrun someone with wings?But there was no time to think. Just as Zelda was about ready to sprint across to the bridge, recognition hit her - she knew this song. It wasn't just a simple melody, and it wasn't a waltz.A haunted gasp seized her chest; the song was a lullaby."Stop!" she cried, leaping to her feet so fast that her head swam. “That song! That was my mother’s… How do you know that song?!"The bard continued to play as he spoke. "I trained under a Sheikah bard, a man who once served the Royal Family of Hyrule. He served as the personal court musician to the Princess of Hyrule, and in that time learned many songs passed down by the family. I only called him Teacher, but I believe his true name was-""Lexo!?"A warm smile crossed the bard's face. "Yes, that was it.""You knew Lexo? How is he?"Zelda could barely believe it. Lexo! Lexo, who had remembered all of her favourite songs, who was there by her side at every feast, who seemed able to feel her mood and play just the right song to match. He'd been a freckle-faced Sheikah, with a golden harp and haunting, almost ancient voice, and only a few years older than her when the Calamity had struck. Once, he had found her crying in the gardens of Hyrule Castle, and had thought it wise to play her lullaby. The same sweet melody that Zelda's mother had once sung. But the song only made her tears worse that day, and Zelda had screamed at Lexo to leave her alone. What she would give now to apologise to him, to make right her unkindness…But the Rito had not answered, and Zelda understood."When?" she murmured."A few years ago," Kass replied solemnly. "He never wanted to teach me the lullaby… or any of the ancient songs. But he felt his strength failing, and knew that they needed to be passed on."Zelda bowed her head, tears falling at last. But the pain felt hollow, the grief little more than an echo of something that had already passed. To her dismay, Zelda realised the the feeling was familiar now, almost a comfort. A numbness that could protect her from the oncoming winter."And so Lexo entrusted the songs to you?" she asked. She tried to picture Lexo as an old man, but only Impa's face that came to mind. The Sheikah bard would always be a boy to her, now.“My teacher taught me all the songs he knew, so that they might survive and be returned to the Royal Family. I made that task my life's work." He had returned to playing a different song, one she had not heard before. This one was indeed a waltz, though somehow sadder even than her own lullaby."But the Royal Family are all gone. At least, that's what everyone believes. How could you know that your efforts weren't in vain?""My teacher had faith that the Princess would return, and he passed that faith on to me, I suppose." Kass's eyes passed over the rippling waters below, and his voice grew fond. "Lexo believed in the power of a good story. And the story of the Hero and the Princess was one of legend."Familiarity became recognition, and recognition became understanding - Kass was the bard Link had spoken of. The one who had helped him throughout his quest to save her. The one whose song had helped them heal Vah Ruta and Akkala Citadel. The one who told Link… that she had once loved him.It left her speechless; this bard had carried her family's songs with no proof that she would even return to hear them. All he had was the word of his teacher, and the strength of his own faith. Zelda looked up at Kass, and heard Revali's voice, and words spoken to her on an afternoon a lifetime ago: your dedication is impressive indeed… and dedication deserves its own reward."'The Hero and the Princess,'" Zelda recited. "'Hand in hand, must bring the light back to this land.' That is one of your songs."Kass halted his playing, muted surprise crossing his features."You've… heard this song, then?""Not in full, no," Zelda admitted, a little sourly. "How does it go?"Kass nervously padded the buttons of his accordion. "I was instructed only to pass the song onto the Princess, and her appointed knight. Am I correct—“"Play the song," Zelda commanded gently, she peered over her shoulder, and saw that the island was empty. "The Princess is before you."Kass opened his beak to speak, but could not, awe and relief blooming on his colourful face. But then, and with a sigh, he shouldered his accordion."Not now. You must tell me what has happened to you and to your appointed knight, the Champion Link."Hearing his name burned like acid, but Zelda kept her face impassive. "My knight?" she said.Her words seemed to startle the Rito. "You do not know him?""No, no, I do,” she said. “Or I did.” Zelda gazed down at the lake as she gathered her words. Beyond the icy shore she spotted the Shrine where she had materialised, and the ravine beyond. Eventually she began to explain, the memories of their heist on Hyrule Castle still raw. "There's a man looking for me. A Gerudo. He leads a group that call themselves the Successors. They've taken Hyrule Castle, but it's as if… they're trying to hide it. They barely have anyone posted beyond the walls and they have barely begun to repair it..."Kass ran idle wingtips across the feathers of his face, nodding as she spoke. "So the bandits do have a name," he mused. "And I take it they are not merely Gerudo?""No. There are Zora, Gerudo, Hylians, and even Rito among their number. Some are Yiga and some are not. I don't understand where they're all coming from.""And you had an unfortunate run in with them, then?"Zelda nodded. In the far distance a white Rito was approaching the ravine that bordered the Shrine. "They know what I look like. They know what I was carrying." She looked down at her bare belt and shrugged. "Though I've lost most of what I had."The memory was coming back slowly, like snow to the thaw; she had been trudging through towards the firelight, and distracted by some great dragon above her, she had stumbled. When she had opened her eyes she was lying by the ravine, the Master Sword and Sheikah Slate no longer bundled in her arms, but rather tumbling down towards the waters below."I made such a mess of things. I really did," Zelda lamented as Kass looked on.She had sat crouched at the edge of that windy ravine for so long that her fingertips and her nose had near frozen over. When she had squinted down to the waters of the ravine, she had been able to make out the glint of the Sword's golden scabbard, but little else. When the pain of the chill had become too much, she'd crawled to the fire she had spotted, and had fallen into what felt like a one hundred-year sleep."I sense this is a tragedy you are telling," the bard offered, and Zelda smiled in spite of herself."It is," She sighed. "We tried to infiltrate Hyrule Castle like fools. Link was injured - gravely - but he helped me escape. And I… I really don't know if he's alive." The realisation brought another ache, this one deeper than the rest. The familiar, almost nostalgic ache of failure. "I should know… but I don't…"Kass gingerly placed a wingtip on her shoulder. "You must convalesce here. Winter is upon us, and it will be a harsh one. The travellers speak of war between the Zora and Gerudo.""I’m sure they do," Zelda whimpered. She had somehow forgotten about the war, amongst everything else.A born storyteller, Kass was more than capable of filling her in. "Thankfully the parties have not met in battle. They cannot, not in the Winter, and not while the Gerudo hold such a defensible position in their desert.""Nowhere in Hyrule is defensible, not anymore," Zelda muttered under her breath.Awkward, caught a little off-guard by her comment, the Rito removed his wingtips from her shoulder. "Indeed," he exhaled. "And I have reason to believe that even Lake Totori is not safe. A friend of mine has noticed strange disappearances in the village, and I just wonder if perhaps…"“It has something to do with the bandits at the Castle?”"I can tell my brethren you are my student, and none will question it, but if these Successors recognise you…"Zelda scanned the horizon, and focused on her breathing. She could not leave Lake Totori, nor could she enter Rito Village and risk recognition. And right now, she had no means of teleportation. And whatever it was she had tried to do in Hyrule Castle, she was not strong enough to reach this 'other place', let alone travel anywhere…Her empty gaze snagged on a faint silhouette in the west; shadowed and monotone, stood the tallest towers of Hyrule Castle, climbing up into the morning sky.What would you do? she wondered. The Castle, and the boy within, gave no response. What was it he had said to her, in Gerudo Town? Drop your shield, forfeight your life. As far as advice went, it wasn’t the worst, and it would have to do. She needed a shield, whatever form it may be."They're looking for a girl with long blonde hair and a golden mark on her right hand," Zelda said, speaking more for herself than for Kass. A shield. She needed a shield. “They’re looking for a Princess.”Just like that she found it. The Princess was her shield; the world believed her to be dead, after all. Princess Zelda could die, but Zelda of Hyrule could live. “I will stay with you, so long as I can hide who I am,” she said."Golden marks and golden hair are are not easily changed," Kass cautioned.Zelda shrugged off his concern. A plan had formed in her mind. Even in Link's absence, it felt like a collaboration. She looked up at her new Rito ally with determination. "Kass, do you have a knife?"First went the hair.Zelda did not allow herself to mourn as she used a paring knife that Kass had on his person (“Generally for peeling fruit, if you must know” he’d said) to slice away her long, golden hair. It was just hair, after all. Like an orchid of flowers, it would grow in both peace and in adversity. Each lock that fell was tossed into Lake Totori to be washed away by the wind and water.Zelda left the hair long enough to be pulled back with a leather tie, and she sliced the bangs a little shorter so that they hung about her face, concealing her soft cheeks and slender neck. The ends were now crude and jagged, frayed somewhat by the dull blade, but Zelda figured that added credence to her disguise.Then, the name."You can call me Rowan," she told Kass, speaking in a lower, richer tone. "I'm a Hylian male, your apprentice. We met in Necluda, the birthplace of your mentor. His legend is what caused me to seek you out.""Rowan is a woman's name, is it not?" Kass implored."And a male name. My parents wanted me to choose. So I chose.""Princess-""Rowan.""Rowan," Kass repeated firmly. "What about the mark?"Last went the princess. She looked down at the golden triangles on her hand, and wished plainly and simply for them to leave her."Zelda spent a few days trying to understand why the mark had appeared..." she said. "She never considered just… letting go."Closing her eyes to focus, Zelda held her left hand over her right. She imagined the life of a Necludan boy with no special heritage and no destiny beyond a simple desire to seek a teacher. She imagined that the real princess been left at the Rito Stables, and had foolishly run out into the Hebra wilderness. That this girl had succumbed to a passing blizzard, and would not be found until the spring thaw.She imagined never having known a noble birth. She imagined never having lived in that Castle. She imagined never having met her appointed Knight. And she imagined never having loved him at all; neither the original, nor his revived self.When Zelda removed her hand, the glowing symbol was gone. Kass breathed a sigh of relief and motioned for them to head towards the village."Isn't it a shame, Teacher?" Zelda said as they walked through the wooden gates towards the spiralling village. The shadow of Divine Beast Vah Medoh stretched across their path. Zelda passed a quick glance at the eagle automaton, and then pushed the thought of it from her mind."Hm?" Kass peered down at her, eyes quizzical."The songs can never be passed on. We will never finish our true task," Zelda explained. "The Royal Family are all gone."The Rito kitchen swayed softly in the afternoon breeze, its chains creaking and groaning. Neatly stacked tins of condiments and spices slid back and forth on the shelves, and more than once Zelda worried that something would fall. But nothing ever did, and for some reason that put her even more on edge.Kass had led her to the kitchen without incident, taking her via his hut to hide her crossbow among his things - the last remaining possession that marked her as something more than a simple bard in training. He had sat at her down by the fire at the centre of the suspended kitchen, naming it the warmest place in the village, but Zelda could not seem to shake the chill. The fear of being recognised rattled her deeply, and every sideways glance she caught from a passing Rito raised her heart rate another metre. Liars must believe their own story, she told herself. And so she recited the same words in her head over and over, until they became a chant.
I am Rowan, bard of Necluda. Zelda is dead, but Rowan can live.
She found that, while she did not fully believe her own transformation quite yet, she had begun to mourn Zelda in a way. Could she have changed fate, if she had found her powers earlier, or if she had made different choices since returning to Hyrule, or perhaps if things had ended differently, between herself and Link? She wanted to pick over the details of the past three months that she had been alive once more, but fatigue robbed her of deep thoughts. Instead she watched the fire, and let herself be entranced by the dance of the flames.Kass had settled down opposite her, taking a polishing cloth to the straps of his accordian. The leather glistened under the firelight, and Zelda could smell the pungent, woody odour of polishing oil from across the fire."My friend's name is Teba," he began after a time. "He’s the one that found you at the Flight Range. And he’s the once that noticed the disappearances.""Can we trust him?" Zelda asked nervously.Kass looked up from his accordion. "Teba? Of course. Teba could never cross anyone. He is too… self-disciplined.""The Flight Range is where Zelda arrived in Hebra. That's where her belongings are. We should retrieve them.""You'll need to wait until the morning then. Teba never returns until sundown, and even a well-travelled boy such as yourself should not make that trek alone."Zelda nodded, taking in the information. She ran a hand through her hair, finding herself still startled but the newfound lightness of it.The rumble of talons against planks and a cacophony of excited giggles and squawks signaled the passing of a flock of Rito fledglings - they were chasing each other up the stairs, squeaking and yammering, and a few who passed stopped to wave, shouting, 'Hello father!'Kass raised a wing back, a wide grin on his face. One of the girls who stopped even added, 'Hello Rowan!'Zelda let out a nervous laugh.They had met Kass' colourful daughters on their way into Rito Village. One of the girls, the mint-green Genli, had spotted her father from the lookout, and soon his entire flock had been walking the bard to his home.Trailing the flock that passed the kitchen was a small white fledgling, and when he spotted Kass and Zelda he stopped in his tracks. His wide yellow eyes locked onto Zelda, and he hovered at the entrance of the kitchen, as though privy to some secret he should not know."Tulin?" Kass said to the fledgling. "Are you alright?"The child seemed familiar; had she seen him in a dream? She remembered seeing yellow eyes above her; two bulbs of amber cutting through the haze of an early morning snow."It's you," Tulin said. "Father took you. Where is he?"Zelda swallowed hard. Had this boy been with his father when he had found her? How much of her had he seen?The only thing to do was deny him. "I don't know what you're talking about.""Tulin," Kass clipped. "This is Rowan. He's my student.""He?" the fledgling cocked his head to the side. "Father called her 'girl'. She has a mark. I saw it.""I do not," Zelda protested, feeling her voice slip. "And I'm not a girl.""But—""Tulin!?"It was a woman's voice that rang out, and soon a breathless pink Rito darted up the stairs towards the fledgling, her curled feathers bouncing about her face. The fledgling's eyes went wide when he turned towards her. "M-Mother?" he squeaked."What are you doing here?" she scolded. "Where is your Father?""Afternoon Saki," Kass cut in, his normally amiable tone strained.Saki stared at them in disbelief. "Kass? You're back?" she said quietly. And then she saw Zelda by the fire, and she narrowed her eyes. "Who is this?"Kass cleared his throat, and stood from the fire. Like a shadow, Zelda followed."I have taken an apprentice," the bard explained. "This is Rowan. He is from Necluda."Zelda gave Saki a quick two-finger salute, as she had seen Link do in the past. Thinking on his mannerisms helped with her disguise, she supposed, even if thinking about him at all fed the ache in her chest."I saw her at the Flight Range with Father," Tulin piped up as he went to his mother's side."What do you mean, little one?" Saki said, idly cupping her son's head against her wingtip. Zelda felt Saki's scrutinising gaze boring into her, seeking the soul beneath. She felt her right hand shaking, as if the divine light could burst from it at any moment."I met Rowan near the Dueling Peaks Stables a month or so ago," Kass continued. "We travelled here together.""But I saw her!" Tulin insisted, reaching up to tug on his mother's wingtip "She has a mark on her hand! I saw it! Triangles or something!"“I think we are being a touch impolite, young Tulin,” Kass said. Zelda’s heart was in her throat.Saki smiled. "Why don't you show Tulin your hand? Humour him."Zelda felt as though her mouth had turned to dust. "Uh, I don't..." was all she managed.Kass was coy, always the performer - he did not acknowledge the tension that they all felt. "We saw a girl of that description at the Rito Stables, Saki. Teba mentioned finding her at the Range. Perhaps this is what Tulin is remembering?""I remember her!" Tulin cried. "I saw it, Mother. I promise - look!"And then Tulin was storming over towards Zelda, and before she could fend him off the boy had seized her right arm, and was thrusting it forward.It was almost unbearable to look, but when she did, Zelda saw nothing more than the back of her hand - her pale skin, the faint impressions of her bones, and her snaking blue veins, but nothing else.Zelda is dead. But Rowan lives."Let go of my hand, child," she growled at the fledgling boy. “Or would you like to feel it’s sting?”Tulin jolted away from her, and sprinted frantically back to his mother. He hid under Saki's wing, and glued his curious yellow eyes to the floor. Zelda saw Saki take a long breath."A pleasure to make your acquaintance, Rowan, and my apologies for my son's behavior," she said. "So my husband has gone to the Stables?""We met him there on our way in," Kass affirmed. "He might still be there."Saki seemed to accept the lie readily, and Zelda had to pinch herself to stop from groaning with relief. The Rito woman placed a hand at Tulin's back. "Do you fancy a walk to Rito Stables, little one?"Tulin grinned and nodded excitedly, and soon the pair were disappearing down the spiral stairs. Once they were out of sight, Zelda knelt once again by the fire. Her hands were shaking, and her heartbeat thrummed in her ears - but she had lived, and her lie had held true. A small victory, but perhaps the first in months. She breathed deep the frigid air and smoke from the fire, feeling cleansed."Come, let us find go wait for Teba," Kass said, extending his wingtip to her. "We will need to speak to him before anyone else."It was Zelda who nodded up at her Rito ally, and Zelda who took his wingtips in her hand; but, as the afternoon light began to recede behind the Hebra mountains, it was Rowan who stood.***A snowstorm had begun to pass over Hyrule Castle, the icy winds howling between the crevices and cracks in the Castle walls. In the winter air, Link's body had become numb all over; first from the cold, and then from the shock. Or perhaps the other way around.The storm had replaced the fever, it seemed, and Link found himself reaching out, yearning for the heat to return, his mind seeking the delirium. At least then there was a chance that all he had seen in the Gatehouse was nothing more than the creation of a memory-addled mind.It was madness. Insanity. A living Guardian, where the rest that had been possessed where now husks. Still, underneath his panic he found a curiosity. Link had never met a Guardian that did not attack. He had never seen one so at peace. He wondered what they were truly like without the corruption. Were they like the Divine Beasts? Did the automatons have souls? Zelda might know.Link winced at the thought of her. Meeting the Guardian had almost made him forget Cinelgen's words - that Zelda wanted to send him away, and that apparently the Ambassador could corroborate the story. Link raised his head and squinted through the dark cells; he spied a Hylian diagonally across from him, pacing, and in the far corner the trio of Rito he realised he had seen when he had come to the castle with Zelda, huddled together, and finally opposite him was Larella.She was asleep, it seemed, sitting against the stone wall with her long arms wrapped limply around her legs."Larella," Link's voice was urgent as he called to the sleeping Ambassador. "Larella!"Larella started awake, and raised her head to look at Link. "W-what is it?" she asked weakly, sniffling as she spoke.Link cast his mind back to that miserable journey out of the desert. He crawled slowly towards the edge of his cell, and leant up against the bars. "When you were speaking with Zelda… did she ever mention wanting to send me away?"Larella pondered his words for a moment, remaining huddled against the wall. Eventually she said, "She did, in fact.""What did she say?" he asked, bracing against the bars for the answer.Larella sniffled again, and recounted what she knew; "We were discussing your escapades up to that point, and she mentioned that it might be for the best if you were to travel to Goron City. She hoped you would be able to find yourself there."Another blow to the chest, but this time it felt as though it came from within. Cinelgen's words clung to the clammy air like a mist. You became someone you never would have been, and she decided to send you away before it became too painful.It was hard to tell in the low light, but Link thought he saw the Ambassador frown. "Why are you asking me?"How to explain? Cinelgen has an weaponised automaton sitting in a shack and thinks I'm the only person living who can control it.Instead, he settled with, "Cinelgen wants my aid. He says I have nowhere else to go and I… I guess I'm not sure."Weary cynicism simmered in Larella's voice. "And this - you aiding the man who has torn apart our kingdom and undone all of your work - hinges on whether or not the Princess cares about you?"He felt like a fool when Larella spoke about it that way, but could do nothing but admit the truth. "Yes."Larella sighed, and finally crawled over to the bars of her cell. She wrapped her jewel-less hands around the rusted iron. "Listen to nothing Cinelgen says, Champion, and ignore whatever you think you feel about the Princess. She isn't here, and nothing she said matters.""But do you think she-""Wanted to be rid of you?”“Did she care for me at all?”“Are you really worried about that? At a time like this? The fact you even need to ask, Champion." Larella laughed and shook her head, her fins flicking gently against her face. "So what? I cared for Dorephan - I loved him - and look where I am."Link had nothing to say to her. His head was swimming again, the last of his fever refusing to yield.Larella was not done. "You cannot play politics with Cinelgen's people. You must do what will keep you alive. I can guarantee you the Princess is doing the same."Stay alive. There was truth in her words, and he'd done a fine job of staying alive in his life thus far. If anything he was bad at dying.Stay alive, Link repeated to himself. He closed his eyes to shut out the question that followed: But what for?***The afternoon light had faded, turning the dusk sky into a painting of every colour. Zelda could not remember the world looking as crisp and clear as it did from Lake Totori, the winter chill seeming to lock it all in place under the dome that was the sky. None of it seemed real; Zelda felt as though she could frame it somehow.Hello, Revali. She thought as she stepped out onto the landing named in his honour. Are you well, wherever you are? Kass was already waiting for her on the landing, his accordion in hand as he serenaded the lake below. It was the sombre waltz again, the one that she did not recognise."Evening, little sparrow," the bard greeted as she approached."Evening's welcome, Teacher," Zelda returned. "Is Teba far away?"Kass had no time to answer. A sudden gust of wind cut through the stillness of the dusk, heralding the warrior's arrival. Zelda watched as the white-feathered Rito warrior swooped up from below the platform, wings arcing deftly as he brought himself in to land on the wooden planks. He appraised them with stern and stony grey eyes, knife-like brows knitted in a scowl."Kass," Teba nodded to the bard, before looking to Zelda. She felt herself shrink away under his glare. "It's you. Your name is...""Rowan. We met on the way into Rito Village," Zelda said, mustering her courage. "I've come to learn the bard's trade."Teba huffed. "You want my advice?" he said gruffly, folding his arms at his chest. "Don't. It's boring, and pointless.""I could say the same for being a warrior, friend," Kass teased. And while Teba rolled his eyes and shrugged off the jest, Zelda noticed something else in his expression. A bristling anger? A frustration? She knew had seen it somewhere before."Why the welcome, Kass?" Teba questioned."I've lost some things in the Flight Range Ravine. I need some help retrieving them," Zelda said before Kass could explain. The warrior did not look at her."I'm an errand-donkey now?" he frowned at the bard. "Thought you said you'd look after the girl.""Ah - Teba, you are mistaken." Kass grinned. "This little sparrow is not the girl you found. That girl was left at the Stables, remember?"Teba stared at them, marble eyes moving left to right between the bard and his charge. "You're kidding, right?"Zelda had had enough of discussing her disguise; and she did not care if this warrior believed it or not. "Kass tells me you're investigating disappearances in the village."The warrior subjected her again to his harsh glare,and for a moment she regretted speaking. Zelda would cower. Rowan would not. She stood a little straighter, bracing for Teba's reply.All he said was: "What of it?""I can help you.""I don't need help," he pointed an accusing wingtip at the bard. "And aren't you his apprentice?""I haven't yet chosen my profession.""Rowan is quite worldly and can aid you in your investigations," Kass cut in. "In fact, it’s imperative that he specifically helps you, having seen so much of what is happening… at Hyrule Castle in particular. ""Him? Hyrule Castle!?" Teba shook his head. "Kass, what is going on?"Kass lowered his accordion, and spoke with a harrowing and unfamiliar severity. "I am asking you to trust me. A new regime of darkness sweeps the land and will fester if left unheeded. You cannot solve this alone. Do you want to help the village or not?"An unspoken standoff. Years of a friendship that Zelda was not party to laid on the line. She watched the Rito spar with nothing more than their eyes."Fine. You damned bards and your words," Teba relented at last. He pointed to the Rito crest painted on the planks. "Meet me here, tomorrow at dawn. I will not wait for you, Rowan, do you understand?""I understand,” Before Teba pushed past them to enter the village, he muttered, "Never much liked sparrows."Zelda watched him go with a mixture of trepidation and annoyance."Is he always that grumpy?" she asked.Kass chuckled, and strapped his accordion to his shoulder. "Teba enjoys his independence. He has never even take an apprentice of his own. But you'll get used to him."The bard reached down to his belt, and Zelda noticed for the first time that he had a large parcel secured to his side. He unhooked it carefully, saying "That reminds me. I cannot teach an apprentice who does not play."Kass handed her the parcel; it was heavy and round, and Zelda had to hold it with both hands. She carefully pried apart the hessian wrapping, and found a golden harp wrapped up within. Eight steels strings were stretched across its curved body, and the ends of its twin arms were carved into the shape of raven's heads with long beaks and blank eyes. Zelda was near completely taken by the beauty of it, and the strange sense that she had seen it before. She let the hessian wrapping fall away, and held the harp in her arms."This was Lexo's. Wait. No - this was Zelda's," she realised, breathless as she beheld the small piece of her past. "He so wanted her to learn, but she never had time.""Perhaps Rowan can learn what Zelda could not."Zelda gazed up at Kass, stunned. "Are you actually going to teach me?""Passing on the songs of your family was my purpose. Of course I will. Before then however, I have a song to play that you might know, but must now hear in full.”***The snowstorm had blanketed in the castle in a thick layer of brilliant white snow, masking its decay and making it almost seem… regal. But it was Hylian tradition that the dead wear white, Link recalled. Am I here for Hyrule's funeral then? He wondered.The chilly morning air nipped at the still sensitive skin on his chest as the guards escorted him through the Castle, his thin cotton shirt doing little to stave off the cold. The throne room was no less wintery, its austere stone and high ceiling perhaps exacerbating the chill.Cinelgen's court was not of the calibre that Link remembered from his time as a knight. There were no lords and ladies, no subtle and untraversable social hierarchy, and certainly no finery. It was Cinelgen, and his bandits. A king and his kingdom, with nothing else in between.Somehow Cinelgen did not seem to feel the winter air. Where the rest of his people had scraped together something in the way of warm garb, the Gerudo kept to his plain traveller's shirt and trousers, opting to show his position through a simple red and burgundy cloak that he wore draped over his right shoulder.The throne room became a sea of hushed whispers when Link was led in. He stepped out into the middle of the wooden planks at the centre of the room, and looked up to the throne, and the man sat precariously upon it."I have made a decision," Link called up to him. "I will help you."Cinelgen had been leaning back in the throne, his long-limbed body seemingly too large for the chair. He stood when Link spoke, and walked to the edge of the balcony."Ah, brilliant news my Hylian friend," he grinned, green eyes sparkling in the morning light. "You thought on my words?""I did," Link told him. "I am not what I was.""Good… good…" Cinelgen leaned out over the balcony, fingers excitedly drumming the faded golden railing.Link took a deep breath, savouring the clarity of mind that he felt; the fever had at last left him the night before. "I have a few conditions," he went on.That gave Cinelgen reason for pause. After a moment, the Gerudo nodded for Link to continue."I would like my own room. A small sleeping cell. Leave me in the lockup and I’ll get sick again.”“Done,” Cinelgen said.The ease of the first request gave Link pause. Wasn’t Cinelgen his enemy?“I’d like to be allowed a dagger,” he went on. “I won’t try to escape, but I won’t let myself be hurt, or worse.”The Gerudo thought this one over for an agonisingly long moment. “Alright, fine,” he finally said. “Even if you did try to escape, a dagger won’t get you far. Just don’t try anything.”Link puffed air through his cheeks. One more to go.“Any prisoners that you take because of me, or because of the Princess… they are not to be harmed."Cinelgen threw his hands up at this one. “Sorry my friend. I simply cannot guarantee how my people will act. We are at war for the future of the kingdom, after all.”Link tried to think of a way to argue, but found nothing. What could he leverage anyway? I'm sorry, Larella. A thin, painful guilt bore through his chest. He had been made to protect others, and that purpose was slipping ever further from him each day.What would Zelda have done? He wondered. She would tell him to just keep going, but she herself would adapt, change. Observe, experiment, record. Try something new.He could do that. There were no more knights of Hyrule, so instead Link would be… well he didn’t know yet. In the absence of a princess to define him, he would find himself — just as she had wanted."You start on the morrow," Cinelgen said. He motioned to the wings, singling out the Hylian youth that Link recognised well now. "Inglis, find Link somewhere to sleep, and give him whatever dagger you are carrying.""Aye, Chief," came the soldier-like response from the Hylian, and before the morning was over, Inglis had completed both tasks. Link was given a sleeping cell among the royal apartments, a small paring knife, and two personal guards to 'protect' him at all times. He found himself struck by Inglis' diligence."I shot you, didn't I? At the Sacred Grounds" Link said to the Hylian after he was led into the cell. "Sorry about that."Inglis would not look at him, instead preferring to ponder the ground between their feet. "It healed clean. Could have nicked my collarbone but you didn't."Link tapped his injured shoulder with his left hand. "Your friend got revenge for you. Twice over."In the Hylian's pained expression Link detected the hint of a smile."Look, I uh…" Inglis began, meeting Link's eyes for no more than a heartbeat. "I know that was a hard choice, for you, but I think it was the right one."You do? Before Link could speak, the Hylian had turned to leave, and he was left alone in his small sleeping cell. It contained little more than a bed, a desk and a chest, with no rug on its hard stone floor and no pictures on its plain walls. Through a tiny, unshuttered window, Link could see the staggered skyline of the Hebra Mountains, and the Divine Beast tucked among them."I'm sorry, Zelda," he said under his breath. "I'm sorry that it ended the way it did."Maybe they weren’t right together. Maybe she preferred him before. Maybe it would be better to just move on. It didn't matter, as much as it hurt. Larella had the truth of it; in this new Hyrule, his priority would have to be to survive.Link ran a hand through his hair. Matted, as it had been for a few days now. The dirt of the cell had woven its way into his hair, making his scalp itch and his neck tingle as the knotted tufts scratched at his nape.Inglis' dagger in hand and his ponytail in the other, Link cut his hair above the leather tie that secured it, in a series of short, uneven hacks. The matted hair fell away, landing forgotten against the ground as outside, another snowstorm was approaching the Castle.Link sat down by the window, and gazed out towards the mountains to watch the snowfall. He shook out his newly shortened hair and felt strangely at ease - welcomed by an unknown familiarity.And then, the suddenness of it catching him off-guard, he laughed - a ridiculous, disbelieving laugh as he remembered: this used to be my room.***Zelda gripped the railing so tight that the splinters dug into her skin. The evening snowfall of the night prior had given way to blistering morning winds, and so she had to brace herself against the railing while she waited for the Rito Warrior. As Teba had instructed, she had risen before dawn and clambered down the frost-covered spiral stairs to the Revali's Landing.It was more than just the morning chill that shook her, however. The song Kass had played for her the night before still looped in her mind, lingering and echoing, refusing to leave her be."You played this for him? Why?" she had demanded of Kass once he was done. She had been red with embarrassment, mortified by what she had heard."He deserved to hear his own story."“So it was you who told him how I had felt. He knew, he always knew.”An ancient evil returning once again after 10,000 years; a Hero who laid down his life; and a Princess whose love for him had awoken the power needed to save their kingdom."That isn't our story anymore," Zelda had murmured. "There is no Hero and no Princess."The bard had clearly not been expecting such a negative reaction from her, but still he spoke softly and calmly."You know, little sparrow, a teller of stories always dreams of meeting his subjects," Kass had said. "When I met Link, it felt as though my teacher's song had come to life. With a single-minded goal of rescuing you, he was the Hero in full. So I wonder if the change is not him, but the world."And the world had indeed changed, Zelda reflected. It was not only ruin that pervaded Hyrule, but an aimlessness too. What was it that Cinelgen had said? The people are little more than leaves in the wind.Zelda had never considered it, and felt like the most callous fool for never having done so: what it would be like to wake up in world as sparse as theirs, to know no one, and to know no purpose but to fight."So much went wrong, in Lanayru, and then Gerudo, and then at Hyrule Castle. After a while I let it flow through me. I had one hundred years to learn to grieve, so when my tears came they did not last. But he had no such time.”“He has never known another life than that of a Hero.”“He didn’t know anything else, he told me that himself. Nothing but the burden of protecting everyone he meets.” "But what happens when you cannot protect people from themselves?" Kass had added. "When it is person against person, when the monsters are hidden in plain sight? When your best efforts create only pain?"Zelda had shuddered then, dazed by the sudden clarity. "I was the only one who could understand. The only story he had was ours. But I told him it didn't matter. That I didn’t have time to listen. Those were among my last words to him, Kass.""They need not be, not yet." Kass had reassured her. "You can still save him.""How?""Teba," the bard had said firmly. "He will help you. He is a strategist through and through.”“I help him with the disappearances from the village, and then what?”“His wife, Saki, is an advisor to our Elder Kaneli. With their support, a retinue of Rito warriors, fast and deadly, could stage a rescue.”And so Zelda now stood on the landing in wait of the warrior Teba. She wrapped her hand tighter around the railing and looked towards the Castle."I've been the biggest fool," Zelda told the Castle, and the boy within, needing suddenly to speak to him. "I thought understood you. I thought I could make you come back as you were, but even I am changed. So, now I—" she thought of the Sword waiting for her at the bottom of a ravine. "No - we — are coming to get you. As you are now. I want to know that you."Another quarter hour passed before Teba arrived at the landing, talons clicking against the planks as he stalked purposefully onto the platform. An angular Rito bow was strapped to his back, the metal gears on its limbs catching the morning sunlight."Good morni-"Teba cut off her pleasantries. "We'll go on foot. You'll keep up or I'll leave you behind. I'm not here to babysit you.""Understood." Zelda gave a curt nod, feeling a little foolish as she spoke in her faux-deep voice. Before they set off, Zelda gave the Castle one last look.Sit tight, Link, she silently called to him, imagining that wherever he was, he might hear her. I waited one hundred years for you. You can wait a little while longer for me.
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
Lexo of Kakariko Village walked with through the pine-strewn paths of Hebra, his apprentice trailing close behind. The young Rito held a parchment in his wingtips, and was trudging through the snow with a glum expression on his face.
The poem on the parchment was written in bold, almost brazen handwriting, as though it demanded to be read. The bard’s creed, it was called. Lexo usually kept it in his notebook, stored safely in his pack with his golden harp and travel provisions. But today he had instructed his apprentice to commit it to memory.
"Give me a hint at least, Teacher," Kass said. "What does it mean?"
Lexo shook his head, tut tutting. "A bard must create meaning for himself, Kass."
Kass frowned. "If I get it right, will you teach me one of the Royal Songs?"
"Not until I have no choice."
The bard had waited a long time to find a suitable apprentice; over ninety years now, as it happened. Kass was a quick learner, with a raw talent for music impressive even amongst the Rito, and a youthful enthusiasm and curiosity that bode well for his future vocation. But Lexo could not teach his apprentice the Royal Songs until the he understood their importance.
"Recite the poem once more," Lexo instructed. "Learn its character. Let the words be the meaning."
"If you say so," Kass sighed as he began to read.
Weave a novel tale
Of the land and sky and sea
Songs sung from the heart
Tell what needs be told,
Of myth and mirth and legend
The truth need not take part
"I still don't understand it," Kass added once he was done. "I will never understand it."
Lexo was undeterred. "Do not dismiss yourself like this, Kass. Fruit always rots-"
"-from within; I know, I know."
As they crested a snow-covered hill, the bard felt his breath catch, and his legs wobble. His age was beginning to show, he realised, and for a moment he wanted to rest. But then he saw them, the image branded within him - that ephemeral Princess that he could never quite capture, along with her blazing knight falling at her feet. Their was the song he had worked so hard to keep alive. The bard felt suddenly rejuvenated. The song would be passed on, in time.
"Again, Kass," Lexo said as he continued along the path. "Those words are more than a poem; they are your duty. As they once were mine."
—
Aching again, in her fingers, nose, and chest. The cold didn't numb her, as Zelda had assumed it would - it made her more aware, and keener too. Zelda felt it all; every cut and bruise that she had sustained in her young life, rendered again on the surface by the Hebra chill."How much further?" she called forward, her words half swallowed up by the wind. Sharp granite eyes shot back the answer: does it matter? Zelda returned Teba's tepid glare with her own scowl, but the Rito warrior seemed unmoved. For nearly an hour they had trudged through the snow towards the Flight Range, and for almost all of it, Zelda had been content to clench her jaw tight and silently brace against the cold. What could she and this Rito discuss anyway?But Kass had told her she could trust Teba - that he could help her - and Zelda could not help someone that she could not talk to. You did not mind Link's silences, came the reply from within. She bit her lip and forged ahead through the snow."I'm told the Flight Range is used for archery practice," Zelda said, jogging to catch up to the Rito warrior, breathless as she fought to keep pace through the snow.Teba grunted in response, but said nothing."The Rito are well respected for their archery skills,” she continued.Teba grunted again. "I know.""Well, I've always wanted to learn," Zelda fought down her mounting frustration with the Rito warrior, determined to remain amiable, and felt the sharpness of his gaze when he eyed her sceptically."Have you? And that crossbow? Just for show?""It was a gift," Zelda asserted. In their final moments together, Link must have clipped it to her belt. Could a gift be forced upon the receiver? she wondered."Some gift. You forgot the bolts."I don't need them, Zelda wanted to say. There was no way to explain. Perhaps she could trust this Rito, but she would be a fool to go about recklessly showing off the powers she had worked so hard to hide.Instead she said, "I know," and surreptitiously ran her fingers over her right hand where the mark of the Royal Crest had once shone.Teba just was shook his head. A cutting gust of wind bellowed through the trees, and it felt as though the cold was passing right through her. Zelda still wore Link's Hylian tunic, unable to find anything warmer to wear, and her hands and fingers were beginning to blister from the frostbite. The Slate will have warmer clothes stored in the Inventory. I just need to wait until we retrieve it. She wrapped her arms around herself and shivered, closing her eyes and dreaming of a hot fire or a warm bed.Teba scoffed. "You oughta be cold. Coming here dressed like that."I didn’t exactly have a choice, Zelda thought. “I suppose there wasn’t a Rito coat spare?”“Nothing that would fit a Hylian. If we clothed every idiot that came our way our tailors would be out of business.”“Well, I had warmer clothes, but I lost them,” Zelda pouted."Yeah, yeah, because you're in some trouble so great that no one will even tell me what it is," Teba grumbled, irritably reaching up to adjust his armour straps, pulling them tighter than needed. "I already have one kid, now I’m stuck with another apparently, only this one is a fugitive and a fool.""You think I wanted to freeze!?" Zelda shouted, her patience suddenly leaving her. Her voice shook as she shivered violently and stumbled unhappily through the snow. "I am not just some random traveller and I would appreciate it if you—“"Then who are you, huh!? Rowan the bard, right? You expected me to believe that?""As I would tell someone as rude as you!"A noise came from Teba that almost sounded like a laugh, if Zelda believed the warrior to have a single mite of humour within him. "Oh, that all you got, Rowan? I'm rude? Because I can be a lot worse."The Shrine by the ravine was finally coming into view, the cerulean pulse marking a faint silhouette against the misty air. They came to a fork in the path that led towards the Flight Range, and when Zelda had no reply for him, Teba shook his head again and hastened through the snow.Zelda chased after him, insolent, footfalls heavy as the snow crunched under her feet. "I never made you help me."Teba spun around to face her, his face drawn and dark. "Let’s just drop it, alright—" And then he froze. His yellow eyes looked past her, turning from granite to molten, and he raised wings, pacifying, yielding almost. “What was that?”She ignored his sudden alarm, her anger having snowballed inside of her. "I’m just trying to stay alive. I never wanted to lie to anyone!""Just shush for a second—" The warrior's gaze flitted back and forth between Zelda and the path behind them."If you must know, these clothes aren't even mine!""Shut up, damn you!" Teba burst forward and seized her by the shoulders, his furious glare cutting through Zelda's anger and stopping the words in her throat.Silence fell, save the hymnal whines of the winds, and the rumbling, ominous sounds of snarls in the distance. She shuddered against the sound, and withered out of Teba's grip.Drawing her crossbow, Zelda turned slowly towards a cluster of pines by the path. Shadows shifted among the trees, pine needles crunching in the snow underfoot, and gradually she became aware of half a dozen hungry yellow eyes emerging like spectres from amongst the trunks.Teba seized her again, grabbing an arm and yanking her backwards. "To the Flight Range! Run!" He shouted, and before Zelda could speak, the wolves burst forward.Lightning fast, Teba loosed an arrow in their direction. It missed, thwacking emphatically against a tree trunk. Zelda raised her crossbow, but a blur of muted blues and greys bowled her over, and half buried her in the snow."Rowan!" Teba shouted, but his voice was drowned out by Zelda's own shrieks and the ripping snarls of the wolf on top of her. Her vision was swallowed up by its yellow-black teeth, and she could feel the pinpricks of claws against her chest. She fumbled for her crossbow, reservations forgotten, the desperation of survival thunderous and pulsing against the inside of her skull. Instinct symphonic, Zelda pulled the crossbow's trigger and felt her right hand burn.There was a blinding golden flash of light that burst against the wolf’s flank. She heard a yelp, and felt it jolt, and watched in shock as it slumped limply at her side, landing atop the crossbow. No time to think. Zelda scrambled backwards, half-sobbing as she crawled through the snow. Horror flooded her when she looked down and saw - the golden mark of the Royal Crest had returned to her right hand.“What the hell was that!?” Teba stood a few feet away, squaring up to a pair of wolves, sweeping his bow in long arcs to try to drive them back. He quickly glanced her way to where she still lay in the snow. “What did you do?”Zelda could not speak. Helpless she watched as the wolves snarled and snapped, circling aggressively, watching for Teba to drop his guard. They darted back and forth, a shifting blur against the stark white snow that Teba could not catch with an arrow. One, two, three he fired, all squelching in the snow. I should run, Zelda thought. I should save myself. One of the wolves feinted, snapping at Teba's right flank. He flinched, faltering, and the wolf leapt, sinking its teeth into Teba's wing.The warrior cried out, and Zelda looked down at the glowing crest on her hand. It was either use her magic now, or let him die – and if he died the wolves would come for her next.Fighting through the lingering shock and the sting of snow against her skin, Zelda crawled back to the dead wolf. She yanked her crossbow out from underneath it, and wrenched the string into its nock.Ahead of her, Teba desperately tried to fend off the attacking wolf. With a roar, he rammed his bow into its side, the curved wood snapping under the force of the blow. But the wolf was undeterred, and yanked Teba forward. He fell, landing hard, droplets of angry red blood dotting the blanketed ground. Zelda took a deep breath, as she had seen Link do, focusing her power into the crossbow. The distance to cover was not far, but if she fired too soon, or too late, she could very well kill Teba instead. It's part of the song, she remembered Link explaining to her, those many weeks ago when he had taught her to meditate. Your breath sets the rhythm.Zelda exhaled and pulled the trigger.The first wolf was thrown backwards by a golden bolt of light that tore through its chest, while the second leapt to take his packmate's place, pinning Teba once more to the ground. Mechanical, methodical, Zelda reloaded, raised the crossbow, breathed deep and fired again, but this bolt grazed harmlessly by the second wolf's shoulder, and she groaned as she fought to reload the crossbow. But the beast was staggered at least, and seeing the opportunity, Teba lurched forward, pulling an arrow from his quiver and Zelda looked up just in time to see him sink the arrowhead into the wolf's eye, before collapsing back into the soft snow.When Teba finally looked at her - breathless and standing there with the crossbow still raised - he almost seemed to smile, and then, with a ferocity that startled her, he burst into laughter. "Well, I'll be damned…" he said.Zelda marched over to him and held out a hand. "C’mon. Let’s go," Her voice was acidic, but victorious. "I think maybe we got off on the wrong foot."Zelda watched with a faint sense of awe as Teba soared out of the ravine, the ferocious updrafts launching him high above the precipice. For a moment he was silhouetted by the sun, and Zelda squinted up to see the Sheikah Slate secured at his belt, and the Master Sword clutched between his talons. She breathed a long sigh of relief, but felt it catch when she remembered the danger that she was in. If anyone sees me with that Sword...or that Slate..."This just keeps getting better," Teba quipped as he handed the possessions to her."I can explain," Zelda said, but Teba just rolled his eyes, muttering "I'll bet."After their tussle with the wolves, Teba had been more than happy to retrieve the Sword and Slate for Zelda. Perhaps not happy, but willing, at least.On inspection, the Master Sword was undamaged - something Zelda decided was a good omen - but the Sheikah Slate would not turn on. Slinging the sheathed Sword loosely over her shoulder, she fiddled with the Slate and frowned when nothing happened. Insistent, and increasingly more erratic, she tapped at the screen, over and over as it stayed passively and frustratingly blank."I can't be seen with these," Zelda said, giving up. She scanned the pass for any signs of life. "Do you have somewhere I can store them?""I've got a chest at the Flight Range," Teba answered after some thought. "And the Range is my territory. No one touches my stuff.""Of course," Zelda said, and followed Teba along the path towards the shelter at the Flight Range. When she looked at his wing, she saw that it was painted with long streaks of blood, staining his white feathers in graduated hues of red and brown. "Are you in any pain?"Teba tested his injured wing, frowning slightly as the feathers shifted, revealing new beads of blood. He shrugged. "I'll be fine."Typical Warrior, Zelda noted.The fire at the Flight Range was burning low; Zelda felt her skin prickle just at the sight of it. She and Teba sat huddled close to the flames, rewarming themselves after their morning trek. While Teba preened his damaged feathers, Zelda worked again on the Sheikah Slate, poking at the screen and testing the buttons without result."You knew Link," the warrior said after a time. He was inspecting the broken limb of his bow, clicking his beak as he prodded the splintered wood. "The real you, I mean, not this other kid you're pretending to be."Zelda thought on Kass's assurance that Teba was trustworthy, and wondered if it was reckless trusting either of them. But hadn't these two Rito saved her life? Hadn't they aided in her disguise? Still, telling them anything felt dangerous. Zelda looked down to her right hand; thankfully, the Royal Crest had faded."What makes you think I did?" she asked innocently.The Rito nodded at the Sword still slung over Zelda's shoulder. "You're wearing his sword. Don't deny it. You can't tell me some travelling merchant had it in his stock."The fire crackled between them, punctuating the weighty silence, and Zelda watched the wavering flames as she pondered her words. At a loss, she looked at the Sheikah Slate in her lap. It offered no help."I travelled with him for a time,” she said. The rest? The arguments, the jokes, the kiss? She could hardly bear to think about it. Did any of it actually happen?"Is that all I'm gonna get?"Zelda bristled. "I'm in hiding and in disguise, as you like to remind me." She tapped nervously at the Sheikah Slate screen. Work, damn you. Teba's eyes were boring into her, unimpressed."Why would I tell you anything else?" she added defensively."Because I know Link. That sword is part of him. And you showing up here without him? Doesn't look so good." Teba gripped his bow between his wingtips and snapped the damaged limb clean where it splintered. He was disassembling it, Zelda noted, salvaging it.Teba tossed the broken limb in the fire. The flames consumed it readily as he spoke; "Saki says my eyesight is going, but I still see. People don't just disappear, and they don't just show up either. You want me to help you, Rowan? Convince me you didn't kill my friend."Cornered, Zelda relented at last. "Fine. But it isn't my fault if you don't believe who I am.""You know I don't care."She took a deep breath and tried to speak the words without feeling. “My name is Zelda Bosphoramus, more commonly known as Princess Zelda of Hyrule. Link was my appointed knight, when we were younger, and together with the Champions of Hyrule we defeated the Calamity Ganon.”"The Princess of Hyrule is dead."Zelda shrugged off his now familiar response. “Believe me, I’ve heard that before.”She told him the rest while Teba took down the rest of his damaged bow, saving only the metal gears and mechanisms at the end of each limb.“After the Calamity, Link and I tried to restore our connection with the Zora and the Gerudo. I admit, my inexperience did not help relations between the two, and we suffered through a number of diplomatic incidents. Nothing unsalvageable, until a Gerudo named Cinelgen and his group of bandits began staging attacks on the Zora. I think to sow discord between them, though I admit I’m not sure. He and his ‘Successors’ now inhabit Hyrule Castle. They plan on tearing Hyrule apart just to rule what remains. So Link and I went there to confront him.”Teba raised his angular brows. “Just the two of you?”“As you can see it did not end well. Link, well he…” her breath hitched. “He saved my life. But now Zelda is in danger, because Cinelgen is likely looking for her, and for this.” She held up the Sheikah Slate."Cinelgen," Teba repeated, clicking his beak, as though scorning the very word he spoke. "A male Gerudo in Hyrule Castle. More novelties." He held out a wing. "Gimme a look at that crossbow."Zelda unclipped the weapon from her belt and passed it to him, watching as Teba turned it over. He tested the mechanism, loaded and unloaded the string, humming with interest. "Is it inherently magic or...?""Link made it. It can fire real bolts. Magic is just easier for me, though I would like to avoid using it."Teba handed the crossbow back. "Get yourself some real bolts then, Rowan."If I had any idea where to get them. Zelda could make bolts from regular arrows, as she had learned to do in Zora's Domain, but that too required the use of her magic. Her sudden apprehension gave her pause; she had spent so much time desperately reaching for her powers, and now she couldn't imagine being without them. Everything new and at once a contradiction, in this strange version of Hyrule she had woken up to.Teba had returned to sorting the components of his bow - the gears, the string, the bracing. He lifted a mechanical gear to his eye and examined the threading."I've given you my story, Teba," Zelda clapped her hands onto her lap to punctuate having held her end of the bargain. "I want to hear yours. Kass tells me there are disappearances in Rito Village."Teba squinted at the gear. "No.""I beg your pardon?""It's sensitive information," he said."What I just told you was sensitive information!""And I won't tell anyone, obviously. I won't even tell my wife, if that helps you sleep." His eyes were strained, fixed on the gear, and he mouthed something to himself that Zelda could not hear."I know where your Rito are going," Zelda insisted. "I can help you prove it to Elder Kaneli.”"I will manage fine on my own.""But you won't. Kass said-""I don't need help," Teba barked. He met her baffled gaze, his eyes simmering with fury.Zelda looked again at the mechnical gear in his wingtips. "Don't you?" she scrambled forward and snatched from him, turning it over to read the small engraving on the side. Harth of Lake Totori."What does it say?" she demanded, intent. Teba's wing shot out to snatch the gear from her, but Zelda jolted out of his reach. "What does it say!?""Give that here!" Teba sprang to his feet, the organised piles of metal components scattering across the floor. He wrenched the gear from Zelda's hands with such force that it stung. She watched him return to the fire, the answer clear."You can't read it can you? Your eyesight is failing," she whispered. "Why won't you let me help you? I told you what is at stake."Teba did not answer. His stony eyes gazed deep into the fire, and Zelda knew that she would no longer get through to him. Damn you, she thought. And damn you, Kass. Damn your trust. With one last huff, Zelda stood and scanned the Flight Range for the chest Teba had mentioned. There was a large trunk in the corner, its handle painted the same colour as Teba's pauldrons; a dull grey flanked by yellow and green stripes. She gently stowed the Master Sword, the crossbow, and still-broken Sheikah Slate within, not bothering to ask Teba if she had chosen the right chest, instead taking his silence as confirmation that she had. When she turned back to the fire, she spotted two figures emerging into the structure from the snowfall: a pink-feathered Rito woman leading a small white fledgeling by the wingtip. Zelda bit her lip. She could feel her blood rushing in her ears."Where have you been, Teba?" Saki scolded as she and Tulin approached. "We have been looking for you!"Teba nodded in Zelda's direction. "Rowan wanted to see the Range." He gestured to the re-ordered pile of mechanical components before him. "I was about to show him how Rito bows are made."True to your word at least, Zelda thought. She gave Teba's family a small wave, and locked eyes with Tulin, smiling with teeth bared. A threat she had learned from the wolves.Saki nudged Tulin towards his father. "Tulin's training is your duty.""I thought you disapproved," Teba said, awkwardly welcoming his son with an outstretched wing. "Said I was pushing him too hard.""Well, he’s your son. I might disapprove of what you teach but I won’t see you neglect him.”“Neglect? I miss one day of training and I’m suddenly absent? Kass disappeared for months!”“Just take him Teba—”“I’m busy—“"Stop!" Tulin cried suddenly, drawing shocked glares from his parents. "Can I just go home? I know what you think of me."The familiarity stung. Zelda heard the sadness in Tulin's voice, and for a moment, it was her own family standing in the Flight Range. Her father, her failures, her hopelessness. She knew that it was time that she leave, to give the family some privacy and to halt her tears.Saki caught her by the arm as Zelda walked past. "My apologies, Rowan, that you had to see this," she sighed.Zelda looked the Rito woman in the eye, and sneered. "Don't worry about me," she said. Saki recoiled, stunned.As she began the long trek back to the village, Zelda could hear Teba and his family arguing, their voices low and strained. Her tears had nowhere to go then, and they mixed in with the melting snowflakes that fell on her cheeks.***Cinelgen had given Link a small journal with which to take notes, but so far he was not sure what to record. I have no idea what I'm doing, was the first thing that came to mind. I'm going to get myself killed, was the second.He had spent the night prior wracking his brains for everything he could remember about the Guardians. They were automatons, created to protect Hyrule against Ganon, with singular purpose and deadly capability. What were they for now that Ganon was dead? He had wondered. What could they be made to do?Troubling thoughts. If Link succeeded, he would deliver Cinelgen a weapon that even he himself would struggle to defeat. And if he failed, he would most likely be killed. States in binary opposition, and stakes as high as could be; an environment that Link at least drew comfort from, given the familiarity.The Guardian was crouched by the far wall of the Gatehouse, its legs pulled in close. It centred its beady eye on Link, its swirling shell pulsing with a mixture of oranges and blues. Huddling, defensive. It was afraid, if that was possible."I won't hurt you," Link said as he approached, empty hands held out to show that he carried no weapons. Could it even understand?At his flank were Inglis and a blonde Hylian woman named Aurelia, assigned to guard him during the sessions, and to rescue him the moment the Guardian turned aggressive. Both of the Hylians carried halberds, longer than a normal spear by half. Above, Cinelgen and his personal guard watched from the upper level of the Gatehouse.The closer Link and the guards moved towards the automaton, the more it seemed to shrink against the wall. Like a wounded animal, Link thought, scrunching his nose at the absurdity of the notion.He looked over his shoulder at Inglis and Aurelia; their weapons were angled towards the Guardian and in that moment he heard a familiar voice. You start on the offense, you’ll get offense in return. Otra’s words. Link silently thanked his memory for giving him back so much of his old teacher. He turned back towards the Guardian.He was no scientist, no researcher, no expert. But he had once been a protector, long ago, and he could rely on those instincts in the first instance."Okay, Back up," Link waved Inglis and Aurelia away. "We're cornering it. It might lash out."Animals lash out, not machines, Link thought. But the Divine Beasts were 'machines', and Link had felt one speak to him when Zelda had inducted him as pilot of Vah Naboris. Did that make them alive? Did that make the Guardians alive?"Any thoughts, Champion?" Cinelgen called down from the balcony.Link kept his gaze fixed on the Guardian. If he concentrated, he could hear the gentle whirring of its gears. Its body now glowed a steady, almost straining orange-red, the light bursting from between its patterned swirls. If it did not feel, why would it huddle like that, as if in fear? Confusion became curiosity."I want to approach it alone," Link said."Absolutely not," Cinelgen replied."We need to show that we trust it before it can trust us." He turned towards Inglis and Aurelia once more, motioning again for them to retreat.Inglis looked nervously up at Cinelgen, but after a moment of thought, he brought his halberd to his side. "Let’s give it a try."Beside them, Aurelia gave a long sigh. "The Champion is the expert," she conceded as she lowered her weapon. "But do not blame me if he gets himself killed."Link took a deep breath as he squared up to the Guardian. It had not taken its eye off him. "You wouldn't be the first of your kind to kill me,” he murmured to himself.Above, Cinelgen's face had hardened, though the amused smile that seemed to live permanently on his lips did not fall. After a moment's consideration, the Gerudo ordered, "If it attacks, hold nothing back."Inglis and Aurelia nodded, before pulling back to the edges of the Gatehouse arena, leaving Link alone with the Guardian. In his periphery, he could still see their shadows, ready to strike at the first sign of danger.Breath held low in his throat, and with a shaking hand outstretched, Link took a slow step towards the Guardian.At first, he spoke to calm his own nerves."I'm here to apologise," he began. The Guardian did not react, and so Link took a tentative step forward. "I've killed more of your kind than I can count." Another step, and then another. "But I believe, because I think other’s once believed, that you can serve a good purpose." Another step took him within arm's reach of the automaton. "I don't think you want to hurt people."The whole room held its breath.He took a final step and placed a cautious hand on the Guardian's outer shell. It felt cool, with a rough texture somewhere between fine ceramic and ageing stone. But somehow there was a warmth beneath, and Link suddenly realised that the Guardian had not moved.He looked up at its glowing eye and smiled. "Hi. My name's Link."Initially, the change was undetectable. Flickers in the light behind the Guardian's glowing eye, which gradually became more pronounced, more distinct. Blinking, Link realised. Random at first, but then more ordered. Purposeful. Communicative. "What are you trying to say?" he whispered, bewildered, and the Guardian's blinking intensified."Something's happening," Link called out, lifting his hand away from the shell, eye's locked on the Guardian. Inglis and Aurelia wasted no time, appearing at his side with their weapons ready."No, wait, I meant-," he tried to say, but it was too late. The Guardian retaliated against the sudden show of force, its segmented leg striking forward like a snake. Inglis was instantaneous; he caught the Guardian's barb-like foot with the point of his halberd, the sound of metal ringing discordantly in Link's ears. The automaton recoiled. Its spidery legs scrambled, pulling it halfway up the wall of the Gatehouse, and the air was filled with panicked shouts. Cinelgen's guards brought their spears to bear. Inglis seized Link by the arm, wrenching him back. Aurelia advanced on the Guardian, her halberd ready to strike. Above the chaos, ringing down clear from the parapets, Cinelgen's voice boomed."Control it! Shut it down!"Cinelgen's guards spilt down to the Gatehouse arena, immediately forming a wall of shields and spears to contain the Guardian. It blinked its eye furiously, mechanical head swivelling from left and right as it tried to track the guards' movements, its shell a riot of colour, flashing from blue to orange to pink."Wait! Wait, please!" Link shouted, but his words were swallowed by the commotion. Desperate, he brought his elbow hard across the Inglis' face, snatching the halberd from his slackened grip and shoving through the wall of guards.Aurelia spun on her heels to meet him, and Link aimed the butt of his halberd towards her. But his injured chest burned, slowing his movements, and Aurelia dodged easily; she dropped her own halberd and threw her hands forward to grab the shaft of his, and with a strength that startled him she tore it from his grip. More strong hands were on him then; two, three guards, all muscling him backwards by the arms, holding him in place while he thrashed against them."Calm yourself, Champion!" Cinelgen called down from the parapet."It's afraid, Cinelgen!" Link shouted back."Afraid!?" Cinelgen roared, slapping his hands down onto the railing of the balcony. "It's a machine!"Was it, truly? Link slackened, and in response the guards released him and let him slump down onto the hard dirt floor of the gatehouse. He sat there unsure what to do, and watched the Guardian gradually resume its default position; legs tucked in close, its shell a soft orange.It was no longer blinking. Link looked again into its cyclops eye, searching for a small glimmer of consciousness. Nothing. Nothing but the dead eye of a machine that had outlived its purpose; a soldier with nothing left to fight.What was he even doing here? Even if he could control the Guardian, which he knew he probably couldn't, he had no idea what would come next, and he knew he could not protect it from Cinelgen, or from what Cinelgen would use it for. But just as he was about to turn - just as he was about to announce to Cinelgen that he had given up - the Guardian began to blink once more. The same pattern repeated again, and again. Three short, three long, three short, three long. Link approached, held out his hand, and gingerly placed it against the Guardian one last time. The pulsing lights on its shell faded to a calm, steady blue as it continued to blink the same pattern. What are you trying to say?"I think that’s enough for today,” Cinelgen suddenly announced. “I don’t want to push our luck."The days that followed began to take on a familiar pattern. Usually the door to his room was locked, with breakfast and lunch brought to him. His sessions with the Guardian were always in the afternoon, but so far had yielded little progress. It was, after what was perhaps a week, finally starting to get used to their presence however, and did not mind Link inspecting it for damage or even letting Inglis and Aurelia approach. To fill the hours left in his room, Link took to jotting down observations in his journal, and surprisingly he found that once he started, he could not stop. The scratch of the pen against the paper was almost therapeutic, clearing his clouded, memory-addled mind.Despite its occupation, Hyrule Castle was eerily quiet. People lived there, that was certain, but Cinelgen ‘Successors’ were hardly more than a band of misfits. Maybe two dozen of them total, and then no more than thirty Yiga on top of that. But to an outsider, it would seem empty, and Cinelgen's number struck Link as surprisingly few. This was the group that had almost killed the Zora Prince, that had started a war, and had seemingly infiltrated nearly every race of Hyrule. Except for the Gorons, Link amended, as he had not seen a single one since his arrival at the Castle a week or so prior.He had been trying to keep count of the bandits' numbers, to track the individual races, learn the hierarchy. It was difficult - he was still a prisoner, and his exposure to the rest of Cinelgen's people came only through his sessions in the Gatehouse with the Guardian and the daily suppers the entire cohort took in the Dining Hall. During supper Link kept a low profile, his head low as his eyes surreptitiously surveyed the room, making mental notes on those around him: their facial features, their mannerisms, the snippets of conversation that came loose from slightly inebriated tongues. Any information he could collect, anything he could take in, it could all be useful. Escape. Mutiny. Insurgency. It was all on his mind; but with some chagrin he discovered that Mipha's power still eluded him, and the wounds on his chest from where Cinelgen had shot him were slow to heal. Trying to escape now would be suicide. So Link walked with calm hands and a watchful eye, wearing the disguise of the complacent prisoner.It was always Inglis that was made to fetch Link for supper. He never spoke, only frowned and clenched his jaw, clearly none-too-pleased to be given the role of errand-boy. As the Inglis led him through the halls of the Royal Apartments to supper, Link noticed on his cheek a new ugly blotch of fading purples and reds - a bruise from where Link had elbowed him."Sorry about, by the way," Link said."Not many guys get to say they got beat by the Hero of Hyrule," he shrugged, and Link let out a reedy laugh."Probably didn't make it hurt any less."Inglis smiled as he shook his head, and Link started as the sweet voice rang in his ears. Now that the Princess is back, you're much more talkative.Wasn't it Paya who had said that to him? On that rainy afternoon muddled among the catalogue of many rainy afternoons that Link had lived since then? Much more talkative. Link felt even more so now that Zelda was gone. Making up for her absence, perhaps, or taking on the mantle, assuming control; extending himself into the hollow that she had left within him. And when he spoke, he could pretend that she might hear.Inglis led Link into the Dining Hall without fanfare. Cinelgen's Successors - Hylians, Gerudo, a handful of Rito and Zora, some dressed in plain garb and others in traditional Yiga reds - were dining at the long tables that ran the length of the room. Only a few heads turned to observe the newcomers, their chatter dipping momentarily before resuming as though nothing had happened. The Dining Hall was the most used room in the Castle, and it showed. Chairs were overturned; the wax of burned-down candles spilt onto the tables; rotting fruit was left to spoil; and the carpets were littered with crumbs, squashed food, and wine stains. Do none of them care?Cinelgen was seated at the table closest to the fire, with Milagre at his side. They were talking privately, heads drawn in close, with two wide bowls of an unwelcoming brown stew before them. There was an empty place laid out for Inglis next to Cinelgen, and another set opposite the trio. An interrogation, Link noted, steeling himself.The Gerudo threw his long arms wide when he saw Inglis approach with Link in tow. "Ah, there we are! My two favourite Hylians!"Milagre scoffed, lifting her attention from an book she was reading. "Thanks," she muttered, but a small smile lifted her face when she looked up at them. Or more specifically, when she looked at Inglis. Out the corner of his eye, Link saw the corners of Inglis's mouth twitch.Cinelgen was beckoning them over enthusiastically. "Sit, Link! There's stew!"As Link sat down, Cinelgen cupped his hands to his lips, his voice booming through the rowdy room. "Hana!" he called out. "More stew!"Inglis took his place wordlessly at Cinelgen's side, and Cinelgen gave him a welcoming slap on the back, before turning his attention onto Link, eyes wide and expectant.Link stared back, unnerved. "Why am I here?" he asked.Usually he would be left somewhere isolated, in the far corner of the room, with no dining partners save his two personal guards; a pair of untalkative and stern male Hylians who had not even bothered to tell Link their names."Why is he here?" Cinelgen repeated with a laugh. "This is family dinner." He spoke as if the words were obvious.Link looked to Inglis and Milagre for some clarification, but Inglis's face was frustratingly blank, and Milagre had returned to her book.There was no one to speak for him. "We're not...family?"In response, Cinelgen clapped his hands and laughed with thunderous abandon, as though Link had told a brilliant joke. "No, no," he grinned. "Can you imagine!"Link glared at Inglis, eyes shouting the question, what the hell is this!? Inglis gave nothing back, though Link detected the slightest hint of a shrug."A figure of speech, Champion," Cinelgen went on, still shaking from laughter. "And an offering of friendship. You are doing great work with the Guardian, but I thought it best that we discuss. After all, we cannot..."Link studied the Gerudo's face as he half-listened, noticing again the scars that marred his face. In fact, Mila had similar scars, and Inglis too. Yiga training, Link guessed. More brutal than any Knight's.The Dining Hall fell away. When are you going to learn Link? There it was again, his father's voice. You just aren't enough. Link opened his mouth to speak, to argue, to defend himself with words rather than swords - an art that he was still learning. I’m trying! Every day I’m trying! I don’t know what you want from me! Cinelgen clapped again, shattering Link's reverie. "There they are, the prettiest girls in all of Hyrule."Debatable, thought Link, as two young Hylian women approached the table, each carrying a bowl of stew. The elder one was in the lead - Link recognised her as Aurelia, the Yiga assigned to protect him during his sessions with the Guardian. Behind her scurried a skinny, freckle-faced girl who Link knew as Hana. She was one of the cooks, Link remembered, drawing her out of his mental catalogue of faces. She was Yiga too, by birth; Link had learned from overheard conversations that while many of the Yiga were recruits, a few were born into the clan, and were marked so by a small inverted Sheikah eye tattooed on their left wrist. Milagre had a similar tattoo, but Inglis's and Cinelgen's wrists were bare."Aurelia," Cinelgen smiled at the Yiga woman, revealing a line of yellowed teeth. "What a surprise."Milagre had finally lowered her book, her brow knotted. "What are you doing here, Aury?"The Yiga woman shrugged. "Just helping out Hana, sisterly favour." She placed a bowl down in front of Link, smiling warmly as she did, and Link noted the Yiga tattoo on her wrist. Hana had already placed her bowl down in front of Inglis and was scampering back to the kitchens."You should be at the Gatehouse," Milagre said sternly. "You are on duty-""Lighten up a little, Lady Secretary, I'll head back after supper," Aurelia teased, drawing out a scowl from Milagre. She bowed her head at the trio, and smiled again at Link, before turning to follow her sister."She calls me that to vex me," Milagre said to Cinelgen, her voice urgent. "You know she doesn't agree with what we did—"Cinelgen held out a hand to silence her. A disagreement, Link noted, adding it to his list of observations."Champion," Cinelgen said calmly, his attention returning to Link. "As I said, I brought you here to discuss your methods with the Guardian. Put simply, I disagree."Link shifted uncomfortably in his chair. He lifted his spoon from the table, dunking it lazily into the bowl of stew. "It needs to trust me. Having so many guards there...it doesn't help."Cinelgen's smile fell away. "The guards are there to protect you, to prevent it from killing you.""I think maybe it would have, by now," Link explained firmly, cautious not to openly defy his Gerudo captor. "If it really wanted to.""Wants!?" Cinelgen slapped the table. "It’s a machine, it has no want!”Link shrugged. "I don't know, maybe. Maybe with the Sheikah Slate we’d know more."“And whose fault is that?”“Until then all we can do is try understand it. Threats won’t work, I don’t think.”"Won’t they?" Cinelgen chuckled and leant back in his chair. "Your sympathy speaks to your status as a prisoner, but your relative freedom has made you foolhardy.""I don't understand," Link said, unsettled by the growing smile on Cinelgen's face.The Gerudo continued, his face darkening. "I’m tired of hearing it. Violence doesn’t always work, Cinna! It got me this far, let me tell you. Well, know this. If you don’t get that Guardian under control, I’ll kill you, and then I’ll find that Princess of yours and her Sheikah Slate, and I’ll kill her too,” He clapped a hand on Link's shoulder, his long fingers digging through the fabric of Link's shirt, and it took all of his will power not to wrench away. "How does that sound?""You just said you're trying to protect me.""Yes, yes, I am!" Cinelgen snapped his fingers. "But do you think we need you, Champion? That we based our entire plan around you?" He laughed again and placed a hand on Milagre's book, gently but decisively lowering it to the table. "Be so good as to fetch them, will you Mila?"With a huff, Milagre sprang to her feet and turned to leave. "Now who's the errand-boy?" she remarked to Inglis as she passed. Link felt his stomach churn. Them? Minutes passed. Inglis was silent, spooning chunks of braised meat and soggy vegetables into his mouth, and Cinelgen sat patiently with his arms folded and his head resting against the back of his chair. Every time Link met his gaze, the Gerudo grinned, and once he even winked. Link wanted to be sick.And then, for the first time that evening, the entire Dining Hall hushed. When Link turned to see who Mila had been sent to retrieve, his mouth fell open, the floor beneath him seeming to fall away. Were he not already seated he would have fallen to his knees.Mila lead in two Sheikah males, their clothes ragged and soiled. One was the same age as Link, and the older elderly and frail, but both were people he had come to know well during his travels post-resurrection; Robbie of Akkala, and his son, Granté.The prisoners were led by Mila single file by a thick rope that had been tied around their necks. The bindings around their hands were so tight that dried blood was crusted against them, and their traditional Sheikah garb was badly torn and soiled, though Robbie still wore his pair of mechanical bronze goggles. Some of the Successors, the Yiga perhaps, jeered and laughed when they saw the Sheikah, words such as traitors and fools filling the room."Above all, Link, I would like you to work at my side," Cinelgen crooned as Milagre lead the Sheikah over to their table. "You have so much potential that you don't see. But I am a man of practicality. If you fail, I will find another way to secure what I want.""And what is it that you want?" Link asked, his voice hollow, eyes fixed on the two Sheikah."I already told you: Hyrule and everything within." Cinelgen's frown brightened into a thin-lipped smile. "But first, let me introduce you to my new guests!""There is no need," Robbie cut in, voice raspy, a mixture of curiosity and disapproval at seeing Link here, alone, and dining with their captors. "I believe Link remembers us well enough."***High above Lake Totori, the sun passed its zenith and began its descent towards the west. The lake waters shone, painted in shimmering golds and ambers, drinking in the stark winter sunlight. The early Winter snows had halted for a short time, and the sky was clear. Like the waters below, Zelda savoured the sun, wishing in vain that it would never set.Beside her, Kass raised his accordion to his chest. "I believe you are ready," he said. "Listen to the melody first, worry about the rhythm later."Zelda held her own instrument in hand – the golden harp that Kass had given her, passed on to him by his mentor, Lexo. Kass and Zelda had spent the better part of the morning sitting together in Rito Village as he taught her the basics: how to pluck the strings, the notes that it could make. It had been slow – Zelda had precisely zero musical training – but it seemed that they could now progress to playing actual songs.Zelda ran her fingers over the strings as she listened to the melody that Kass played for her. It was so short that he played it twice."Now, listen again, little sparrow," Kass instructed gently. "Feel the shape of the song, learn its character, as well as the notes."The bard repeated the song a third time, slowly at first, but gaining speed as she learned the song. Zelda copied the melody on her harp. She focused on the rise and fall of the melody as she played – the way the song seemed caught between hopeful and sorrowful, and the way it sounded somehow ancient, the way it was...almost familiar."I know this song," she breathed, fingers frozen on the strings. The memory was hazy, half-forgotten, a blur of colour and noise. But the song; it burned within her. "I have heard it before.""Perhaps Lexo played it for you, in your previous life?" Kass suggested."Perhaps. Perhaps he did." But there was more to it than that, Zelda knew. "I've heard it recently though. In some dream or…in the back of my mind. What is it called?""The name is lost," Kass explained. "But Lexo knew it was connected somehow to the Royal Family. A song adrift in time.""Time…" Zelda repeated, eyes fixed on the horizon beyond.Kass lowered his accordion; Zelda was too lost in her musings for the lesson to continue. "My teacher once said that song is a memory made immortal," he stated. "He said that songs have an identity. A purpose.""That sounds like Lexo," Zelda agreed with a soft laugh.She had been in the village almost a week now. Teba either refused or was too ashamed to talk to her; so Zelda decided to use her now-abundant time to convalesce. She seemed safe, at least for the moment, and wanted to let her mind settle and recover from the chaos she had endured in the past few months. But still, she could not remain idle. It did not suit her.Their lessons done for the day, Zelda stowed her harp safely back at Kass's hut and made her way to Revali's Landing. It helped, going there. Behind Rowan's mask, Zelda had begun to fade. She was torn now, between the necessity of being Rowan and the comfort being herself. But the memories of her childhood visits to Rito Village, and the afternoons spent at Revali's Landing helped her find grounding - a medium between past and present, between alive and dead.Zelda stood near the edge of the platform and assumed an archer's stance - or at least, what she remembered to be an archer's stance. She raised her arms, grasping an imaginary bow, pulling back the string, and took a breath."Straighten your back. It'll help keep your aim consistent."Zelda slapped her arms down to her sides at the sound of the gruff voice behind her, feeling her face tingle from embarrassment. "An old friend once tried to teach me," she said as she turned to see Teba stepping out onto the Landing. "With little success."“He mustn’t have been a good teacher.”“He was a Champion.”Teba raised his eyebrows. "I didn't know the dead could teach.""He wasn't dead at the time.""Yeah, yeah, I know. Neither were you.""Did you just come to argue or…?""No, actually," Teba said as met her at the Landing's edge. He stared long and hard at the horizon, squinting and scowling, as if offended by what he saw. There was a new bow at his back, Zelda noticed. It was smaller, strangely, and was painted white and gold. "I suppose you're waiting for an apology," he said."I'm not waiting for anything from you."Teba chuckled, the sound still awkward, like a muscle untested or a song only half-known. "I deserved that. And I am sorry, if that matters to you. No old warrior likes being shown he's lost his edge.""You said you were Link's friend," Zelda ventured. She placed a hand on the crossbow at her hip, having been unable to part with it since the fight with the wolves. "Well, I was too. And I'm just trying to do what he would have done.""I don't think that kid would have sassed me quite the way you have, but I get what you're saying," Teba retrieved the bow from his back and pulled the string to his chin, testing the weight."New bow?""Not quite,” He gently released the tension in the string, and made a small adjustment to one of the gears. "It's a training bow. For fledgelings.""I suppose you'll have to make do, what with your other bow broken."Teba laughed again, and Zelda wondered if she would ever get used to the sound. "You really think I'd take a fledgeling bow?” He held the bow out to her. “It's yours, Rowan.""W-what!?" she stammered, but Teba was pressed the bow into her hands.Teba continued as Zelda examined the weapon, her fingers running over the painted wood. "Found it in Harth's workshop. He calls them Sparrow bows. They fire quick, have a light draw weight. And I remembered that nickname Kass has for you and I couldn't resist.""But I've already got a bow," Zelda tried to protest, unsure how to process the act of kindness."A slow, jury-rigged crossbow,” Teba said with a frown, and Zelda was glad Link was not here to hear that. “But you have no bolts, and you said you want to avoid using your magic. I can teach you to use a real bow instead."His change of heart still bewildered her, and Zelda cautioned herself not to accept kindness so readily. It could be a trap. It could always be a trap. "I don't understand," she said. "You're going to teach me? But—""Just listen, alright. I don’t… I don’t do this apologising thing very often,” he folded his wings and dramatically threw his head to the side, looking out across the mountains of Hebra. “Something is going on with my people. Maybe it's connected to your Gerudo guy or whatever, but I've got a lead I intend to follow. And you were right, Hebra is dangerous. I need someone who knows what's going on beyond Lake Totori. And you've got a good eye. Hone that aim a little, and you'll have no trouble keeping up.""But what of Vah Medoh?" Zelda pressed, looking up to the great divine bird above them, which she still had not had a chance to analyse."I'll be honest I've been too afraid to check. But I've seen no movements from it, and as far as I know, it's been left alone since the attack on Ganon."Safe for now then, Zelda thought. "And this lead?"Teba rolled his shoulders as he began to speak, as though explaining himself were a chore. "Some of the Rito are disappearing, for a few hours or days at a time. Worse, most of our couriers are missing in action. Sometimes a couple go no contact for a few months but, right now it’s nearly half. I think it's suspicious, but no one believes me besides Kass, and he already helps as best he can. The Rito like their isolation, their freedom, Rowan. They like not thinking about things. Even Kaneli dismissed my concerns."The old owl, Zelda recalled. Elder Kaneli was the leader of Rito Village; Kass had introduced her a few days prior. At the time, Kaneli had shared information with Kass that she had been able to overhear. We have heard troubling news, Kass, the old owl had said. Reports of fighting in Lanayru, of Zoran soldiers marching towards Gerudo.She shook the memory from her mind and refocused her attention on Teba, who was continuing his explanation. "One of the guys that went missing - Rylen - I heard him talking to Toten about a Rito named Yahn, saying that he was travelling through Hebra and that they never knew where to meet him. Yahn is the next link in the chain, I'm sure of it. If the Rito are going to the Castle like you say, if something is happening to my couriers, then this is how we find out.""Travelling through Hebra?" Zelda's eyes went wide. "Hebra is enormous!""I know. But I also know Yahn. And I think I'd know where he'd go.""An old friend, then?"Teba did not answer. He looked down at his feet kicked the wooden planks with his tallons."Yahn was my apprentice," he admitted with a frown. "Many years ago.""But Kass said you never had an apprentice…""Kass weaves his tales," Teba warned. "He omits the bad parts. Keep that in mind when you sing his songs."Zelda clutched her hands to her chest as she processed the information. Disappearances, suspicious conversations, people in denial of the problem; it was uncomfortable in its familiarity. On the horizon, she caught sight of Hyrule Castle and its ruined towers. An expedition into Hebra, she thought, determination stirring in her chest, accompanied by a sensation that was now foreign, forgotten almost; with a small smile, Zelda realised that it was excitement.“If we find proof the Rito are going to Hyrule Castle, that they are somehow connected to Cinelgen…” she said.“I’ll get Kaneli on side, somehow.”“You said the Rito value their independence. Cinelgen would not. He told me himself. He wants the whole Kingdom to himself.”“Let’s hope that’s a good enough reason for Kaneli and the others,” Teba said. "But I'll understand if you say no."But Zelda had already decided. She had seen Rito at Hyrule Castle, and she had heard Cinelgen's plans. If he were trying to sow discord at Lake Totori, then she would find out, and she would put a stop to it. This isn’t your kingdom, she thought as she gazed at Hyrule Castle. It’s mine.In acceptance of his offer, Zelda extended a hand to Teba, adding, "You aren't the travelling partner I would have chosen."Teba huffed, a sardonic smile crossing his features. "Oh yeah? Well, I'd not have chosen you either, Sparrow," And with a firm grip he shook her hand.***Three short. Three long. Three short. Three long. Link scribbled down the pattern into his notebook.… - - - … - - -The Guardian blinked the pattern at Link again. It had not stopped since he entered the Gatehouse with Inglis and Aurelia.Despite his initial success, progress with the Guardian had hit a standstill. Nothing he could say or do seemed to get through to it. It was happy to let him approach, but responded to no commands and refused to even move, except when startled. During one session, Link had spent the entire time trying to get the Guardian to follow him around the room, to no success. In another, he had approached it slightly too quickly, and now nursed a fearsome black and red bruise on his arm from where its powerful leg had struck him.But he was certain now that the Guardian was trying to communicate. His problem was that he knew absolutely nothing about the Guardians beyond their capabilities as fighters, and the only two people who might were entirely out of Link's reach. Robbie and his son had been thrown in the Lockup, and Cinelgen outright refused to let Link visit them. And Zelda - while Link was reasonably certain she was safe, he had no way to contact her, of course. He supposed that was the trade; if she was free to investigate out in the wild, he would have to do the same from within the Castle.The Guardian’s blinking continued unceasingly. Inglis was stood at Link's side, gazing in awe up at the flickering of the Guardian's eye."You think it means something?" he asked."I wish I knew," Link sighed dejectedly. Above them Cinelgen watched from the parapets, his mouth smiling but his eyes repeating the threat of violence he was so fond of; you fail, and you die.I need to talk to Robbie, he determined then. That is my only chance.Link looked down at his notebook and began to flip through the pages.***At long last, on the day of their departure, the Sheikah Slate flickered back to life. Zelda hugged it to her chest, embracing it as though it were an old friend. Collecting herself, she hurriedly pulled Link's snowquill gear from the inventory and pulled on the downy material as Teba organised their packs by the Flight Range fire. They would travel on foot, the Hebra wilderness being too mountainous for a horse to be of any use. Kass had seen them off from the village; he had decided that if Zelda was beginning her travels again, he ought to do the same. The bard encouraged her to practice with her harp if she could, and promised to do his best to deliver the letter to Impa.Zelda hummed the song he had taught her as she did one final check over her things. She had been practising it, learning its character, as Kass had instructed, but no matter how many times she played it or how hard she reflected, she could not remember where she had heard it.Everything was in place. The Sheikah Slate was latched at her hip, hidden under a red and white Rito sash. The golden harp was stored in its case, tucked safely into her pack. The crossbow had been left in Teba's chest, no longer of much use, replaced by the Sparrow bow that she wore on her back. And the Master Sword...Zelda held the lid of the chest open, taking one last look at Link's sword. She reached down to run a thumb over the patterned hilt, idly humming the song again, and from the Sword, she suddenly felt a radiating warmth.She snapped her hand away. How could it be warm, stored here in half-frozen Hebra? Cautiously, Zelda wrapped her hand around the hilt, feeling a strange tension in her arm, as if the Sword were resisting her.The warmth had receded, but then so had her confusion. "The song!" she gasped. Zelda began to sing the ancient song again, clear and crisp as she could, and as if on cue the Sword warmed in her grip."The hell are you doing?"Teba's voice snapped her out of her trance."Nothing, nothing," Zelda assured him, hurriedly shutting the chest. "Just checking the lock. I am ready to go when you are.""Good. We need to get moving. I want to make it to the South Summit by nightfall."Zelda pushed the ancient song from her mind. She fetched her pack, pulled her warm new gloves down at the wrists, and followed Teba out into the Hebra wilderness.***The last light of the evening had receded, draping his bedchamber in shadow. Link lit a lamp and returned to waiting patiently for the telltale sound of footsteps outside his door signalling Inglis's suppertime approach. He shivered. The cold had infiltrated every part of the Castle; every room and every nook, embedding itself under Link's skin, in the backs of his eyes, in his very blood. It did not help that Link still had no proper winter garb. He had managed to steal a hooded vest from the side of a Hylian who had fallen asleep at supper and had convinced Inglis to find him a pair of gloves at least, but other than that he had to suffer through the cold in little more than his trousers and cotton shirt.Link held his notebook in hand and ran through the plan again. It was a gamble. It was a guess, based on a single look and a faint memory of bickering. When Link had realised that it reminded him of his fights with Zelda, he knew he had to be right; if bitter and broken love sounded like anything, it was an argument. In his notebook was written the only proof, an observation he had written the evening prior; Milagre and Inglis don't sit together, but they want to.It had only occurred to Link recently that Cinelgen might plan on going through his notebook; to seek out traitorous musings or eek some information out of him. He began to keep his notes vague. Few names, just descriptors, no dates or times either. The Gerudo could not punish him for taking notes. And if he thought that Link would not be constantly scheming for a way to escape the Castle, then he was as foolish as he was cruel.At last, the footsteps approached, and Link leapt to his feet. There were low voices outside; his guards conversing with the visitor and giving the approval to enter. It was as Link expected. The door opened, and Inglis entered, ready to escort Link yet again to 'family dinner'.Link caught the Hylian by the arm, fingers just tight enough to make the threat clear - a trick he had learned from Cinelgen the night before. "I've something to show you before we go," he said.For a moment Link thought Inglis might refuse. But he just he sighed, as if having been expecting this, and said: "What is it?"Link led Inglis over to his tiny window that overlooked Western Hyrule. He peered at the silhouette of Vah Medoh, only just visible through the snow."You're going to help me speak with Robbie," Link said, unphased when Inglis returned his demand with dumbfounded silence. Better that than he runs straight to the guards. He explained himself further, "Cinelgen has put the Sheikah in the cells, and won't let me visit. Perhaps he's stubborn, or just doesn't understand, but Robbie knows about Guardians. He is valuable."Inglis shook his head. "Cinna understands. He likes testing people."He wants to see if I fail, Link noted. "You are Cinelgen's friend. The guards listen to you.Inglis began to back away from the window. "I won't go behind Cinna's back—""I don't want to threaten you, Inglis," Link said gravely. He couldn't afford for Inglis to panic. It would draw the attention of the guards."Oh, really?" Inglis's face suddenly twisted, his hands balling into fists. "I can handle another bruise.""That isn't what I meant," Link reached out to place a pacifying hand on Inglis's shoulder. He took a deep breath, the words reluctant, but necessary: “Inglis I know about you and Milagre. I know you’re hiding it too.”The reddening of Inglis’ face told Link he had hit a nerve; just the one he’d wanted in fact. The boy’s knuckles were white, and his jaw clenched so tight his face trembled. Link gave his shoulder a squeeze, but Inglis reared back, shoving Link backwards."Is that all you knights do?!" he snapped, springing away from Link. "Hurt people?"“I don’t want to have to. Please just help me speak with Robbie and I won’t tell Cinelgen a thing, I swear—“The rest was crushed under the force of Inglis' fist as it connected with Link's jaw, and he was blinded, crumbling to the floor, so stunned that he almost giggled. Link opened his eyes and saw the ceiling."Is that a yes?" he asked, still dazed.Inglis glared at him, suddenly calm. He sighed; a long, drawn out breath, and Link wondered what on earth had caused the boy so much pain."It is," Inglis frowned. "I'll help you." And he turned to leave."What's going on in there?" one of the Link's guards asked as Inglis passed."Nothing," Inglis told them. "This one has just decided that he doesn't want supper."As Link lay on the ground, pain blossoming in his right cheek, he could not help but smile. The gamble had paid off.You see, Cinna? Violence doesn't always work, Link imagined himself saying. But the victory subsided, and his pride had begun to fade into a deep shame at manipulating Inglis with his schemes. Violence is easy, Link would tell Cinelgen when he saw him next. Words can do so much worse.***
In quiet moments, they pause, and wonder: how did I get here?
The Princess feels the crunch of snow under her feet and calls out again to the Rito warrior walking ahead of her. How much further, she wants to ask, but is afraid of the answer. Instead, she asks, are you okay? The Rito looks back and for once doesn’t scowl, and the Princess feels a small thread of trust between them. Don't worry about me, Sparrow, the Rito answers.
The Knight stands at the door of the Gatehouse, writing down observations and thoughts. Can it speak? He asks himself, as he looks upon the automaton. Does it have a name? The Knight decides it should. So he chooses one that reminds him of the Kingdom he and the Guardian once belonged to and names it after the man who called for the automaton's unearthing. I'll call him Rhoamet, the Knight scribbles in his journal.
By sunlight they don't think about each other much, their minds preoccupied with their newfound facades and the deliberateness with which they now live. But once the starlight gradually emerges, their thoughts travel halfway across the country, leaping over mountains and ravines to places imagined and once known. The Princess runs her hands through her curtailed hair, and tests the draw weight of her Sparrow bow, shivering against the Hebra air; the Knight sits silently at dinner, and plans his next session with the Guardian, his fingers padding the bruise on his chin.
In these quiet moments, when they are their true selves and not the personas they have become to survive, the Princess and Knight think of each other.
I wonder how he is. I wonder how she's doing.
I wonder what they would say, if they could only see me now.
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
To the untrained eye, the Eastern Reservoir appeared empty, its waters so still they could be mistaken for ice. The cold that came with the onset of winter didn't reach under Sidon's scales. There was too much salt within, thickening his blood, deterring the crystals that would dig their way underneath and seek to push him out.The other Zora were not so tough-skinned as him. Even Sidon felt the weight of their weariness in his chest. His people huddled and shivered, and soon their grief breached that broad, thick wall that Sidon had made around himself. He thought it had been made impenetrable by a century of mourning; of wondering why his sister had left them, why his father wept every evening, and why the crown destined for him never seemed to fit. In years past, Sidon would smile, ball his fist, and face the grief that pervaded his home with nothing but positivity, and optimism, and hope. It was all he could do to survive.But now… now, it was nearly too much. The Gerudo attack had torn his people asunder like fish ripped from the waters and left to flail and drown in the sun.One hundred years of peace bordering on tedium and then, the attack – unfeeling, uncaring – a dozen arrows pinning the King to his throne and a sharpened blade slicing his fins. Blinded, Sidon had torn every bandit that he could catch to pieces, waking with bloodied hands and salt-filled eyes to the sound of his father's voice.Too fast. Vah Ruta. My daughter. Where is my Mipha? The garbled words of a sundered King. The Prince had gone to Vah Ruta then and had submerged her within the Eastern Reservoir where no bandit or Zora could reach her. As the fullness of understanding began to take hold, his hand shaking as he held it to Ruta's main terminal, Sidon could have sworn he had felt the Divine Beast weep.Too soon. The Prince retreated. Both within himself, and to places that no one else in the Domain could reach. The Council had taken over the Domain in the interim. They declared war on the Gerudo on the day of the attack, dispatching word to the envoy in the desert, and Sidon found himself somehow in terrible agreement. "Do what you must," he told his Council and pushed this 'war' from his mind.Soon the Zoran envoy had returned, with two of their number dead and a third missing. From that moment Zora's Domain ceased to exist. Any foreigners within the city were evicted. Trade with outsiders was halted. No one entered the Domain and no one left.At the centre of this chaos, however, Sidon found a pearl of positivity; his sense of faith that his people, and his home, could always endure. But faith was not enough, and his pain was holding firm. Sidon had known courage. He had met its personification. But he could not find it within himself.At least he had Vah Ruta. Surveying the Eastern Reservoir one last time, Sidon watched dawn break over the glimmering plateaus and etched mesas of Lanayru. Bracing himself, he leapt into the freezing waters.As he pushed further below the surface, a faint constellation of pulsating blue lights came into view until Sidon reached the gargantuan form of the Divine Beast Vah Ruta. He swam in through the archways of the stern and immediately made for the Main Control Unit. When he placed a hand against the terminal, Sidon heard the voice as if spoken from some great depth within himself.
Prince of the Zora. You return.
No time to talk just yet – no way to speak through the water. Sidon closed his eyes and pulled; the inner mechanics of Vah Ruta whirred and pushed against the frozen waters, and together, Prince and Beast rose through the Reservoir until they surfaced into the morning light."Good work, Vah Ruta, and good morning," he called out as the waters drained. "Run a diagnostic for me, would you?"
I am functional. I report nothing else.
"Wonderful, wonderful to hear." Sidon walked into the central chamber and placed a hand on one of the sub-terminals. "No signs of Malice anywhere?" he asked.
None since I was cleansed by the Champion and the Keeper.
"Keeper? You mean the Princess?"I do."Tell me about this new title of hers. I have not heard it."
It is not new. She keeps the Three.
"… I see," Sidon said, not seeing. Then the Beast spoke of its own volition.
Where are they? You seek them.
Sidon sighed. "I do not know, Ruta. But I have faith that Link and Zelda are well."The Beast sensed his apprehension.
If it is as you say.
Confident that Vah Ruta was safe and unharmed, Sidon left her floating by the docks of the Reservoir and made his way slowly back to Zora's Domain. The Beast's last words to him lingered, simmering amongst his idle thoughts. Sidon had never considered that Link and Zelda might be in peril. In fact, he had forgotten them entirely in the month since the attack. But now they were present once more, bringing a wave of longing and loneliness, as well as a simple, almost inherent question: are they involved somehow, in this war?Too complex. Champions went, and trouble followed. Sidon had avoided the Council Chamber, content to his cowardice. But no more. His friends needed him.The Chamber at Zora's Domain was uproarious, but when Sidon entered the room, the silence ached."Morning's welcome," Sidon smiled at the reverent faces; old Zora, young Zora, all noble and dripping in jewellery - with Muzu at the centre, a force of his own around which the rest of the Domain crumbled.Muzu grinned with thin lips. "We were just talking about you."Sidon remembered the shouts that he had heard from the hallway and feeling the appraising eyes of the Council upon him did not let his smile drop. "Wonderful," he said, and the whole room took a breath.Muzu waved him over to the war table. "Come, we were discussing potential angles of attack," A map of Hyrule had been laid out, drawn on a large square of yellowed parchment."Attack? Surely we have no need for more violence," the Prince cautioned.Muzu gave a desultory flick of the fin. "A figure of speech, of course." He addressed the Councillors in a gravelled voice, honed by age. "Now, Councillors, I believe the Domain has spent enough time on convalescence. We must act. I have dispatched a new envoy to secure the newly-constructed Geldarm Bridge-""You said attacking was a metaphor," Sidon rose from the map to face the Council. Beside him, one of the younger diplomats bristled, hands crossed impatiently at his chest."You think we should just let them go unpunished?" the diplomat challenged. The jewels hung from his dorsal fin tinkered as he spoke."Allow me to finish, Sidon," Muzu said firmly. "And thank you, Farlo, you are right. The Gerudo will answer, but a direct attack is unnecessary."The Councillors whispered and nodded, but the more Sidon looked at the map, the less sure he was of this 'war'. The first attack had been on Vah Ruta, perhaps with the intention to seize her. But the second - it had been so sudden and unprovoked, and the bandits hadn't gone anywhere near Vah Ruta. The Beast's question was on his mind; where are Link and Zelda? If they were involved, and Sidon felt somehow that they were, there had to be more to the Gerudo attack."Listen - we ought to wait." Sidon met each Councillor's gaze and saw their apprehension. "We should try to find the Princess and the Champion. We could use their aid, and we know they were in the desert with the envoy.""Those two are too busy with their lover's quarrel to help us," scoffed Farlo. He had been with the Zoran Envoy as well, Sidon remembered and was among the last to see the Hylian duo."Are you aware of their whereabouts, then?" Sidon demanded. "As a diplomat, you should know their value." He towered over the diplomat, and in taking a step towards him, saw Farlo's marble glare turn to water."Well, I— it was a stressful time. That fool Ambassador had been taken, by a Gerudo no less, and—"Sidon turned his attention back to Muzu. "And what action has been taken to find her? Where did she go!?"The mumblings from the Council amounted to a collective shrug. "To the desert, of course," Muzu offered."As a hostage," Farlo added."And have the Gerudo made any demands?" Another ripple of mumblings. No, Sidon surmised. Sidon threaded his tongue through his teeth in frustration and eyed the map again. Like the Hylians, they had no idea of the Ambassador's location. Why take her and make no demands?"Call it off," Sidon ordered, eyes set square on Muzu. "Something does not add up. We are diving headlong into a conflict that we do not understand."Shouts rang out in the chamber. Our King is dead! What is there to understand?Muzu spoke softly and calmly, but his words sent a shockwave through the chamber, and soon all were listening to the old advisor. "We will not sit idle. Hyrule must see our strength.""No. If the Gerudo retaliate, we are outnumbered, and vulnerable." Sidon could feel allegiance in the room shift towards the advisor, but he held firm. "Call it off."Muzu returned intensity with assurance. "I'm afraid I cannot do that, Your Grace.""Am I not your ruler now?" Sidon snapped. "That is an order!""Oh Sidon," Muzu sighed, a chuckle escaping his lips. "Where is your political education? We never officiated your title. The Council has elected me as Regent until the war effort is over. In any case, you cannot make demands without the Council’s support."Sidon glared at his father's advisor. "Usurper," he snarled, and the Council tensed."Careful now, Sidon, let us not venture into the realm of treason. I am Regent, after all."Sidon looked at the Council, their eyes now blank and foreign. They had not looked upon him with reverence, he realised, but embarrassment, and second-hand shame. "You allowed this?" he asked them weakly."You allowed this, Sidon," Muzu countered. "What was it you said to us, mere days after your father was slain?! Do what you must?" He circled the table with his hands behind his back, eyes fixed on the map, and the Councillors shifted around him. Muzu tapped a webbed finger to the place on the map marked Ruta's Plateau, and said, "The Domain is safe under my rule, now it is time to have our retribution. You, Sidon, are no longer needed."***Teba regarded the Sheikah Slate with apprehension, as though the Sheikah eye on its back could bear witness to his innermost thoughts."So this is the power of the Sheikah. I’ll be honest, it's a little unsettling."They were stood together atop Talonto Peak, a spiral-cut hill with a single, towering pine at its peak and an outcrop that extended out over the ravine below. They were now three days into their journey and had seen no sign of any other travellers; Zelda was finally confident that it was safe to use the Sheikah Slate without the risk of being seen.She peered up from the screen and lowered the Sheikah Slate from her face. "I'm just doing a remote diagnostic. Think of it as taking a photo."Teba's concerned expression held. "I don't know what that is."Ignoring him, she raised the Slate once more, holding it in the direction of Divine Beast Vah Medoh. A schematic of the Beast's mechanical body was displayed on the screen. Worse, she noted with some dismay. Much worse.In the days after she and Link had defeated Ganon, Zelda had run remote diagnostics on all four of the Divine Beasts. Each of them beside Vah Ruta had reported being in good working order; functional, secure and at the time, without a registered pilot. But now Vah Medoh seemed in a similar state as Ruta once was; low power, teeming with Malice, and now releasing a distress signal. And to make matters worse, Zelda and Teba were walking away from the Beast, hiking on foot through the frozen mountainsides and deep ravines of Hebra.Zelda lowered the Sheikah Slate, and looked down from the peak at the now distant Lake Totori and the pillar of rock that rose out of it, onto which Rito Village had been quite literally bolted. From this distance, Vah Medoh shone, the luminescent etchings beginning to light up along the Divine Beast's ancient body as the afternoon began to wane. Zelda followed the colossal bird's line of sight towards Hyrule Castle.There was a Shrine at the castle, she remembered, at the docks. She could teleport there, find him, get him out and teleport back to Hebra. It could be so simple."Don’t tell me you’re thinking of sneaking back into the Castle?"Teba too was now appraising the ruined Hyrule Castle, his eyes hard and critical. Had he read her thoughts?"I know it's dangerous but—""But you have absolutely no intel, that's what," Teba cautioned, and Zelda remembered what Kass had told her. He's a strategist, through and through. "Even if Link is still there, which you admitted you don't know, you have no idea where he's being kept. That Slate can get you out of trouble, but you can't get you out of trouble. If you lose the Slate, you've lost your way out, and you've dropped it in the hands of your enemy."Zelda re-stowed the Sheikah Slate, accepting the truth of what Teba had said. But beyond his arguments, she realised, she accepted her own fear."So what do you suppose I do then?" Zelda pressed, unnerved by her own apprehension. Link would not hesitate to rescue me."We’re still working on that," Teba said. "One thing at a time, Sparrow."He turned back towards Hebra, and walked out onto the outcrop, peering long and hard across the rise and fall of the mountains. Zelda took a moment to rest, crouching low to ease the pain in her aching legs. The excitement of journey into Hebra had been quickly replaced by a quiet regret at realising she had neither the strength nor endurance for the long hikes and climbs."Where to next?" she asked, a little afraid to hear the answer."North. We'll walk back down in the morning."Zelda frowned, rubbing the ache from her legs. "So why did we climb up?"Teba pointed forwards, across the long ravine that lay beneath Talonto Peak. Zelda stood and met him on the outcrop, squinting against the harsh light of the setting sun. At the next crest over, a hut was nestled into the snow, its presence made known by no more than a thin line of smoke rising from its chimney, dissipating into the hazy sunset."A friend of mine lives there. She travels around Hebra quite a bit," Teba explained. "No point dropping in if she isn't home."The first stop in their journey; as Zelda surveyed the hut, she noticed that it was built at the edge of a series of steep, smooth slopes. Zelda opened her mouth to speak, to ask, what is your friend doing all the way out here, when, from behind them, she heard a sniffle.Both Teba and Zelda turned to see a small white fledgeling emerging from behind the pine tree, carrying a small and overstuffed pack."Tulin!?" Teba growled. "How long have you been following us!?""I'm sorry, Father," the boy whimpered. "I just didn't want to be left behind. I wasn't sure how to tell you. But then it got so cold."Zelda saw that his eyes were slick with budding tears, and drooping from exhaustion."You cannot come with us, Tulin," Teba placed a wing on the fledgeling's chest and began to push him back along the path. "It isn't safe for you. Go back to your mother."Tulin would not budge. "No! I know you think I'm not strong enough! But I'm getting stronger!"Teba heaved a long, fatigued sigh, and knelt before his son. "I know me leaving without you is confusing but—""It isn't confusing. It's unfair." Tulin insisted. "I thought I was your apprentice, Father. Not her.""Tulin, I need you to go back home." Teba placed a pacifying wing on his son's shoulder, his words gentler than they could have been. "I'm sure your Mother is looking for you."But Tulin shook his head, and Zelda saw Teba's expression darken when the boy said, "She isn't. I don't even know where she is.""What do you mean?""She left just after you did," Tulin answered innocently. He was plying the strap of his pack tight between his wingtips, shivered slightly against the chilly afternoon winds.Teba tightened his grip on Tulin's shoulder. "I need you to be honest with me.""I am! She was gone for hours before I decided to try to find you."Oh no...It can't be. "Teba…" Zelda began."Tulin, do not lie to me." Anger had started to thread itself into Teba's voice, but Tulin stood defiant, the tears beginning to roll down his cheek."I'm not lying. I never lied!" Frantic, he pointed to Zelda. "That girl has a mark on her hand, I saw it. And I'm not lying about Mother either!""Teba, I think he's telling the truth…" Zelda pressed, feeling a strange numbness in the place of shock.The Rito warrior suddenly stood and marched over to her, speaking in a harsh, almost threatening whisper. "You expect me to believe my wife is involved in all this.""I don't know," Zelda admitted. "But we are here to find out…" she looked at Tulin, who was staring at them with wide, hopeful eyes. He was no longer the little brat who had almost gotten her found out, but rather a lost young child, desperate to be accepted. Zelda left Teba on the outcrop and knelt down before Tulin, giving him a warm smile. She shot Teba a glance that said, don't interfere."You made it all the way here yourself?" she asked. Tulin nodded, sniffling as new tears formed in his eyes. "That was very brave of you. These mountains are dangerous."Tulin nodded again. "I followed you the whole time. I wanted to turn back, but then it got dark…""I understand," Zelda said gently. "But it's okay to be afraid, little one.”Tulin's face dropped. "Mother calls me that. I hate it. The girls tease me for my size.""How about brave one then? I don't think any of Kass' daughters could have done what you have." Zelda looked back to Teba, words coy and clipped. "What do you think, hm? Hasn't he been brave?"Teba gave her a dark look, and all he said was, "We're taking him home in the morning.""No!" Tulin cried, but Teba was unmoved. Zelda smiled at Tulin once more. "Stay here," she whispered and returned to Teba."I know it's dangerous," she said in a low voice. "But do you think he's safer there than here? All alone?""He will be a burden. Don’t look at me like that, you know it’s true.”“Even so,” Zelda crossed her arms over her chest, looking up at him, defiant despite the way he towered over her. "Teba, listen to me. I know exactly how he's feeling. I know what it's like to be a disappointment, to not understand why you can't just be what is expected of you." Teba opened his beak to protest, but she continued. "You can push him away now, and again, and again, until you finally start taking him seriously. But he will remember each time. And he will wonder why you seemed to hate him so.""How can you know that?" Teba growled."Because I had a father too once, Teba. One much like yourself."Teba glared down at her, but she stood firm, surprised by her determination. At last, the Rito relented; "We will decide in the morning," he said coolly, ignoring Tulin's small, joyful cry. "For now, help me make a fire."Tulin set about dutifully to his task, and together father and son set about coaxing the flames to light. Once they were crackling, Zelda collapsed down beside the campfire, weak as water. She was exhausted; in body, and in spirit.Teba was awake before either Tulin or Zelda rose, and Zelda guessed that the warrior had barely slept. He was knelt by their fire, the flames burning low, his eyes closed and his breath measured.Zelda recognised it as the meditation that Link had taught her and determined not to disturb him. With Tulins help, she cooked some mushroom skewers, adding some spicy peppers that Tulin had found.“We made breakfast, Father,” Tulin called to Teba once the food was ready. At first Teba didn’t react, but then he turned his head slowly and looked back over his shoulder at them. His brows were drawn; sympathetic rather than stern.“Thank you,” he said quietly, and moved to join them.“We tried to get the fire going a bit more, but I’m not really sure how,” Tulin said.Teba seemed to smile, kneeling down beside his son. He looked to Zelda."We wouldn't be the ones complaining.”Zelda feigned offence. "Oh, my mistake for being born without feathers," she retorted, and Tulin giggled.The fledgeling fidgeted as they breakfasted in silence, eating little and fighting a second round of sniffles. Afterwards, as they readied their packs, he took extra care to sort his belongings. And when they were finally ready to move on, he would not rise from his seat by the fire."What are you doing, Tulin?" Teba asked."I'm sorry," Tulin said, crestfallen. "I'm just not ready to go home yet. It was…it was so exciting following you."Teba knelt down in front of him, helping the tighten the straps of the fledglings pack. “You really wanna come with us?”“I do! I’m tired of the Flight Range. I wanna go places!”Teba stood, and looked west towards the cabin they had spied in the distance. “Alright. Then let’s go.”Tulin's face lit up, and he leapt to his feet, pack slung deftly over his shoulders. He was at his father's side in an instant, the more enthusiastic traveller of the duo."I knew you'd let me come with you!" he beamed."Yeah well, thank me by keeping up." Teba reached down to ruffle Tulin's feathers, eliciting another round of giggles from the fledgeling. Zelda smiled and followed close behind. It's a start, she thought. ***The mechanical goggles whirred as each eyepiece moved independently, the pin-prick irises examining what they saw with a cold, analytical certainty. Below, Robbie's mouth was pressed into a thin-lipped scowl. In the dim light, Link caught sight of splattered dried blood on the goggles, crusted and peeling, and a yellowed bruise ageing on Robbie's cheek. Likely the tale of the capture of the Sheikah researcher and his son was a lively one. He found himself wondering if Purah was also in danger, and took the fact that she was not here as a good sign."You are sure then," Robbie frowned. He pressed close against the bars of his cell. "Zelda is alive?"Link closed his eyes, extending his awareness to somewhere beyond. He'd felt it the day before; a small, persistent tug from the centre of his back, so faint that it almost didn't register. The Sword had sensed her, and it sang the song of her presence. "Yes, definitely," Link concluded, re-opening his eyes."Really?" came the breathless question from the next cell over. Larella, Ambassador of the Zora, was still interred in the Lockup. "How can you be sure?"Link clenched his jaw and eyed the ground. I just am, he wanted to say, but the more he thought about it, the more he wondered if it was more wishful thinking than some sixth sense.Robbie rubbed his chin thoughtfully. Beside him, Granté was propped up against cell bars, both eyes blackened, his hair hanging in greasy streaks about his hollowed cheeks. Robbie looked down at his son, his harsh scowl softening into a weak smile. "We mustn't fret over the Princess. She has been on her own before."Link saw that Granté's eyes were glassy and vacant. The Sheikah had barely reacted to Link's arrival in the Lockup. "What happened to him?" he asked."They captured Granté first," Robbie explained. "Starved him, trying to make him reveal my location. They've had him for months, in a camp in Akkala. He managed to send me a letter somehow, begging for me to hide. But when I heard they had my son..." Robbie ran a hand through Granté's hair as he spoke, his voice cracked under a sorrow so powerful that Link felt it in his chest. "I sent Jerrin to Hateno and sought out their camp myself. I said that I would go with them if they ceased harming my son. They agreed, and here we are."Link did not know what to say. He knelt down and inspected Granté's gaunt face. The young Sheikah blinked at him, his eyes turning harrowingly placid - almost hopeful. "I'm sorry this has happened to you," Link murmured. Granté slowly opened his mouth to speak, and swallowed with some trouble. "My father…" he croaked. "Protect him."Link nodded, but the promise felt hollow. He was on the other side of the bars, that was true, but he could do little to help them. Keenly, like feeling the heat of the sun or the trickle of sweat against his brow, he became aware of Inglis' presence at the edge of the room. He was waiting, leaning up against the far wall, dark eyes watching the meeting."Why have you come to me Champion?" Robbie asked. "Why is it that you walk free?""I do not walk free," Link said tersely, casting an askance glance at Inglis. "They take me everywhere. They tell me what I can do.""You are certainly more free than any of us," came the comment from Larella. Frustration stirred in Link's stomach. Wasn't it you who told me to survive?"They tell you what to do?" Robbie questioned. "What is it that you do for them?"Link looked to Larella, and then back to Robbie. How could he begin to explain? "…I just want to say that had no choice.”"Are you helping them?" Larella asked, her face drawn. She approached the bars of her cell, and Link could see the thin scar on her neck. He could do nothing but nod, and stare at the ground.Robbie scowled, and even Granté seemed affected by the revelation. "They're Yiga, Link. My people's sworn enemy—""There's a Guardian! In the Gatehouse. A live Guardian!" Link blurted out. He saw Inglis watching, and began to whisper. "And they think I can control it!""And why is that?" Robbie whispered back."They must have heard what I was doing before I rescued Zelda, with the Beasts. They think I have some...natural talent." Link wrapped his hands around the bars. "But I don't. I need your help."The beady eyepieces of Robbie's goggles centred on Link, the luminescent irises intensifying as he spoke. "Allow me to repeat myself, Champion. That Gerudo Cinelgen is a Yiga. I would die, and see the ancestral technology of my people completely snuffed out before I aided his ends.""Alright, alright," Link pulled out his notebook and flipped through the pages. Finding the page he needed, he held the book up to the cell bars. "Just tell me what the pattern means."Robbie did not look at the notebook. "No.""Cinelgen is going to kill me," Link felt the desperation in his throat. "And anyone who gets in his way. He’s looking for Zelda. Please."The Sheikah sighed once more, and looked up at the notebook. He scanned the notes where Link had drawn the pattern of the Guardian's blinking.… - - - … - - -"It's a distress signal," he said, running a finger along the page. "Save our souls. You've written down too many letters. There's only three in the phrase."Link could not stop the grin from crawling across his face. "Really? That's…" He was speechless, his smile wide, triumphant. He'd been right! "The Guardian is calling for help then.""Yes, fascinating actually," Robbie brought a hand to his chin. "Communicative functions were retained...""Communicative…?""No,” Robbie drew back, re-centring his focus on Link. "I've already given you too much."In his periphery, Link saw Inglis shift. Time was running out. He looked to his Hylian captor, and suddenly remembered how he had gotten to the Lockup in the first place. Words, and secrets, a new kind of knowing, allowing him to manipulate Inglis into sneaking him through the Castle in the dead of night. A puzzle where people were the components. If I did it once, I can do it again."Robbie, the Guardians are your life's work," Link pleaded. "You told us that they could be useful. That they could protect us. What if I can use mine to break out of here? And if I don't learn to control Rhoamet, then maybe Cinelgen eventually will.""Rhoamet?"Link shrugged. "…I thought he could use a name."Robbie peered at Inglis waiting in the shadows, and then looked back to Link. If he was convinced, Link could not tell, but then he ushered Link forward and said, "Quickly. Give me that notebook."Link did as he was bid, and the Sheikah began scribbling down a series of letters and symbols. "Sheikah Code uses a series of long and short signals. Purah, Impa and I have been using it to encode letters since we were children. Pre-Calamity we discovered that the Guardians could communicate basic phrases using the code. Pity Zelda isn’t here, we taught it to her too. Though I commend you for sending her away." When he handed it back, Link saw that he had written the entire alphabet, but with each letter accompanied by a series of dots or dashes. "It seems like your Guardian is in a bad state. Find out what's wrong with it. But keep it out of Cinelgen's hands, do you understand me?""I will. I swear," Link said breathlessly, eyes scanning the code. "Thank you, Robbie."Inglis was approaching; Link snapped the notebook shut."Be wary, Champion," Robbie said as Inglis ushered Link out of the Lockup. "Lives depend on your actions. Perhaps now more than ever."Link blinked away his sleepiness as they lead him into the Gatehouse; he had spent the entire night committing the Sheikah Code to memory. When he closed his eyes, he saw dots and dashes that swam in his mind like moths surrounding a flame. He had left his notebook in his chambers.The Guardian seemed to have grown used to the visits, and no longer huddled against the wall when they entered. Instead, it sat, almost passive, against the far wall of the Gatehouse and watched unblinking as they approached."Morning's welcome, Rhoamet," Link said, quiet enough so that only he could hear. The Guardian had not lashed out in a few days, and Cinelgen now seemed convinced that it either could not or did not want to use its offensive capabilities, in particular its deadly beam. So now the sessions were staffed only by the dutiful Inglis and savvy Aurelia, as well as Cinelgen's two personal guards - a green-feathered Rito named Marl, and a Gerudo woman named Teel. Link would have preferred not to have Cinelgen's watchful eye over them during the sessions, but the Gerudo insisted on overseeing every meeting, with a wild smile, and eyes solid as granite.Link stood before the Guardian, and held out a hand. "Your halberd, Inglis.""…Are you joking?" Inglis laughed from behind him, the sound humourless, more of a harsh wheeze than a chuckle.Link held firm. "Give me your halberd.""You think we're going to give the Hero of Hyrule a weapon?" Aurelia retorted. “We averted disaster the last time you got your hands on one.” She stood on Link's left flank, her halberd pointed just slightly towards the Guardian. It had yet to gain her trust."I'm asking nicely," Link warned. His mind was hazy, the letters coming back in flurries and waves, and he blinked them away without success. "I don't need to ask. But I am."Words are stronger. Words are worse. When the two Hylians stared at him blankly, Link went over their heads. "Cinna!" he called. "Trust! I can't work without it!”Cinelgen was gripping the balcony, grinning as though the entire exchange entertained him. "Inglis. Do as he says."With a scowl, Inglis handed Link his halberd and using the pommel Link drew three letters into the dirt.
S O S
The Guardian looked at him blankly, tilting its body town to observe the writing. Beneath the letters, Link wrote the pattern as he remembered it; ● ● ● ▬ ▬ ▬ ● ● ●"I'm sorry I didn't...remember… sooner. But I know what you're trying to say now. And I can understand,” Link said to the Guardian.The Guardian took two steps towards the code, its body flashing orange, and then blue. And then it began to blink, the pattern new. Link studied the blinking, brows furrowed. He became keenly aware of the eyes upon him, as well as the price of failure. It was an intricate pattern. Long, and new, the meanings of the signals only half remembered. He fought down a yawn, his concentration waning. And just as it became too much, Link heard the voice.
You can't hear the song with a clouded mind.
Otra. The Battlemaster. His teacher. He wasn't even family, and yet he was still a stronger presence than most of the figures from Link's former life, he'd realised. "I know, Otra," Link muttered. "I know."Link focused on his breath, centred himself, and locked eyes with the Guardian, collecting the letters in his head as he recognised them."T..B..D...O...W...TB Down?"The Guardian blinked a new pattern; ▬ ▬ ● ▬"Yes?"It blinked the same pattern again; ▬ ▬ ● ▬"Yes," Link said. "I don't know what TB is."A third pattern. Link read out the letters. "B...e...a...beam! Ah - targeted beam?" He looked up at Cinelgen, reigning in his excitement. "His beam is broken!""Good, good," the Gerudo replied, and he walked down from the parapets, his guards following close behind. Rhoamet stepped backwards, body gleaming a muted orange hue. "You can understand it now?" Cinelgen queried."Ah...not quite," Link said, trying to let the words feel natural. "It uses a code. I know a little but not all of it.""Wonderful, wonderful, so you can piece it together? The full code?" Cinelgen approached the Guardian, and it continued to step backwards. Link felt the panic churning in his stomach. If it lashes out, if it hurts him…"You will produce a cypher for us," Cinelgen commanded. "If it can communicate, then it can take orders.""I'd need more time.""Naturally," Cinelgen clapped Link on the shoulder and leant down to meet his eye, the brightness of his gaze only barely hiding the ruthlessness beneath. "I'm proud of you, Link. You came through for me."Cinelgen motioned to his guards to depart the Gatehouse, leaving Inglis, Aurelia and Link alone with the Guardian. Link turned back to the Guardian, Inglis' halberd still in hand. He scrapped his foot across the dirt, clearing away the markings he had made. With the pommel, he began to carefully write his own name."Alright, buddy," he said to the Guardian. "I think it's time we began proper introductions." ***The snow was falling in a thick lattice when they finally arrived at the cabin, and its owner, a sprightly Hylian woman named Selmie, seemed to be the only one excited by the passing blizzard. She met them with a beaming smile and a warm mug of tea, the steam rising to meet her face, her cropped blonde hair tucked under a beanie."Isn't this weather perfect for slopes?" Selmie grinned, her plump cheeks made rosy by the cold air. "Two years ago we had a warm winter, and I almost went out of business.""I still don't understand how you stay in business, Selmie," Teba said as he shook his feathers free of the snow. In his shadow Tulin was doing the same, his braided feathers snaking back and forth."Word of mouth is a powerful thing in Hebra," Selmie shrugged. "But who am I to keep you outside with my chatter? Come in, come in."The cabin was cosy and warm, with a small fire crackling in the hearth and just enough space for a bed, a desk and a simple kitchen. An isolated life, Zelda thought, sensing the appeal that it would have. No responsibilities. No burdens. Just the beauty, and the brutality, of the open air."Cocoa? Tea?" Selmie asked, fetching Zelda a mug from the kitchen."Oh, uh—" She wasn't sure what Rowan would drink. "Tea is fine. Hyrule Herb.""Coming right up, uh – what was your name?" Selmie asked with a smile so welcoming that Zelda almost gave the woman the truth. Instead, she just gaped at her, suddenly dumbfounded, and so Selmie turned to Teba with a slightly concerned look."You never introduced us. New apprentice?""No, no," Teba corrected a little too quickly. He sat cross-legged by the fire and gestured for Tulin to do the same. "Travelling partner. Selmie, this is Rowan."Zelda tried to give what she imagined was a boyish smile as she shook Selmie's handThe Hylian woman brewed a fresh mug of tea and another mug of hot cocoa. She gave Zelda the first and took the second in hand as she approached the fire."You must be Tulin," she said, handing the fledgeling the second mug. "The last time I saw your father you were barely more than a chick, and now look at you."Tulin giggled in response, thanking her and bringing the mug to his face. Zelda knelt beside Tulin, drinking in the warmth of the fire, feeling the chill shake from her skin, and the flames lightly scald the tip of her nose."In fact, I haven't seen anyone since that darling Hylian boy passed through here last winter," Selmie said as sat down opposite the Rito, a sly smile on her face. "Best shield surfer I've ever seen. I had to bar him, would you believe? Forget the weather, he alone would have run me out of business. Not that I would have minded.""A prodigy, then?" Teba asked, shooting Zelda a knowing glance, and her eyes went wide as she understood; she's talking about Link."Something like that," Selmie took a long sip of her drink. Zelda looked down into the steam that rose from her mug, unable to drink. Selmie leant forward, lips twinged into a curious grin. "Now, I know you Teba. You aren't here just to visit. What is it that you want to know?"Teba straightened his back, readying himself. Zelda saw his gaze harden; a shield against his own vulnerability. "I'm looking for Yahn."Selmie lowered her mug."You aren’t, you old fool," she sighed. "We spoke about this—""I'm not trying to get him back," Teba cut her off. "I think he might be connected to something. I need to know if you've seen anything suspicious in the mountains."Selmie thought for a moment and then stood, going to her desk and returning with a small notebook. "I have seen something. Near Hebra Plunge. A week ago. There was quite a camp in an old Bokoblin cave, and I remembered seeing a few Rito. But I…" she flipped through the pages. "I remember seeing Hylians too. All were wearing these strange neckerchiefs. And I found it odd because well, I'm Hylian. And I didn't recognise the style."Zelda felt her breath catch. "Blue and white?" she asked.Selmie scanned her notebook and then tapped the page. "Yes, actually. I've got it right here. Blue with white embroidery."Cinelgen's Successors. Zelda looked at Teba and nodded. They were on the right track."Thank you, Selmie," Teba said. "This is valuable information."They spent the rest of the morning with Selmie while she and Teba caught up. She had lived in Hebra her entire life, she explained to Zelda, and became famous for her shield surfing abilities. Ten or so years ago, she formed a lasting friendship with the Rito when they employed her to teach them her skillset. "They thought shield surfing would keep their injured warriors mobile.""But…" Zelda said."But if you've got an injured wing, a shield just becomes an extra burden," Teba sighed. And then, with a grumble. "That and Rito are top heavy. We…fall over, a lot."Selmie stifled a laugh, her face brightened by her smile. Zelda imagined her talking with Link; praising his abilities, casually inviting him in for a drink, smiling at him as she asked him if he would like tea or cocoa. Perhaps it wasn't really Link. She had not found the courage to ask, but just as they were preparing to leave the cabin, she caught Selmie by the arm."This Hylian, what did he look like?""Oh, a bit like you actually," Selmie laughed. "Same messy hair, same Rito clothes. He was quiet like you too, but it wasn't his talking that I liked." She waggled her eyebrows."That…but…" Zelda stammered. "You shouldn't - He was a customer!""Rowan," Teba cautioned, placing a wing on Zelda's shoulder. "We were just leaving."But Selmie just laughed. "No need to get jealous, girl. I meant his surfing. I never saw more of him than that."Begrudgingly, Zelda let Teba usher out of the cabin, but nearly leapt from his grip to tackle Selmie when she heard the woman mutter, "As much as I would have liked to."Consulting the map on the Sheikah Slate, Teba estimated that it would take a week to reach the Hebra Plunge. They could round back towards Talonto Peak and then head through the southern pass towards the Hebra Headspring, following the falls south-east."We'll keep to the trees, stay out of sight as best we can," Teba addressed Tulin and Zelda as though he was their squad leader. "There are two old Bokoblin camps in this region, one in the south and one in the east. The Rito could be at either." He made no mention of Yahn; what to expect from his former apprentice, or even what the Rito would look like. Zelda wondered what had transpired between them.In the mornings, they rose at dawn, breakfasted, and trained. Teba had Tulin and Zelda doing archery drills until their arms were sore and their fingers red raw. Enough that Zelda had begun to hear his instructions in her dreams. Back straight. Elbow up. Stop tensing. Where's your eye? Feel the air. Feel the arrow. Nothing teaches aim like the fear of missing. When she had told Teba that she and Link had been sparring with spears, he began her and Tulin on drills with tree branches as well. The fledgeling was strong, but was not as quick, and was easy to trick. He fell for nearly every feint, was surprised by every blow that came in his direction, and was knocked on his feet more times than Zelda could count. And Teba was unyielding, militant in his expectations. He watched Tulin's failures with marbled eyes, collecting each instance with unnerving stoicism. Zelda worried that, despite her warning, Teba could not shake his disappointment with his son.By day they walked. In the early days day of their expedition, Zelda had found the snowquill gear cumbersome; the tight leather chest piece, the thick and downy pants and the wrapped boots doubling the already exhausting effort needed to hike through the thick snow. But now that winter had well and truly come, and the winds whipped with such ferocity that they stung, Zelda was grateful to have Link's gear. How was it, she wondered, that he could still be looking out for her, even when he had placed half a kingdom between them? I could never be rid of you if I tried, and she realised that the thought gave her comfort. It was the crispness of Hebra, product of its stark and manifest beauty, that seemed to yield the truths hidden by the usual rush of living. I wish you were here, Zelda thought as she took in the shock white snow. I wish I walked with you at my side.Dusk light brought more drills, and by the evening Zelda was too tired to mind Teba's silent company. Tulin too was often exhausted, falling asleep soon after they supped. One evening as they neared the Hebra Falls, she and Teba were knelt opposite each other by the fire while Tulin snored softly at Teba's side. He still loves his father, Zelda thought sadly. No matter how often he is rebuked.Zelda was idly tapping through the inventory function of the Slate, looking through Link's collection of weapons and gear. There among them was the Great Eagle Bow – the proud Rito weapon that Revali had once wielded. Unable to resist, Zelda pulled it from the inventory. It materialised above the Slate, and she caught it by the grip, and was surprised by how heavy it was. When she tested the draw weight, she could not even pull back the string."That was his?" came the question from across the fire. Teba was working on his own bow; a new Falcon not too dissimilar in make from Revali's. “The Champion’s?”"Something like it," Zelda replied, handing the bow to Teba. The Rito warrior tried to pull back the string and sighed when he had no more luck that Zelda. "Not sure why I bothered." He muttered, turning the bow over in his hands. "With my eyes, I'm not much good with a bow as it is.""Don't say that," Zelda frowned. "If it helps, you're a better teacher than Revali was."Zelda smiled as she remembered the Rito Champion's ill-fated lessons; he had tried to teach her to shoot during her yearly visits to Rito Village. But she had little talent and less self-confidence, and eventually, his pride won out over his patience. Perhaps you should stick to praying, he had teased, and she remembered being so hurt that she told him she hated him."Doubt I could have taught you much," Teba said dryly. "What with my track record."Zelda frowned. She had been thinking on how to broach the subject for days. "We can talk about Yahn if you want to."The Rito warrior looked up at her, the flames of the fire framing his glum expression. "I don't want to."Zelda knew not to press the subject further. In time, she reasoned, and to change the subject she asked, "Do you really think he’d be colluding with Cinelgen?”“I don’t know. But I wouldn’t be surprised.”“But why would he be?”The Rito's brows knitted in close, and he re-commenced examining the Great Eagle Bow as he pondered the question. Eventually, he shrugged and said. "Why does anyone?"Zelda realised that she didn't, or at least, that she had never asked the question herself. "He told me that the people feel they have no place. Leaves in the wind, he called them. He said it was my fault. Without a royal family in the Castle, the kingdom has been adrift.”"Well, the bastard's got some of it right," Teba said, shaking his head."You agree with him?""I don't agree with starting a civil-fucking-war if that's what you're asking,” Teba looked down at Tulin to check that he had not stirred and went on. “But Cinelgen has one thing right, the Hyrule I grew up in was a mess.”“I think the people of Hyrule did well, to endure.”“Of course we endured. Mould endures. Fleas endure. Is that the same as thriving? I’ve met a dozen lost, confused young guys over my time who would jump at the chance to be part of something, even if it was as bad as you describe.”Zelda felt the instinct to argue, to defend against the painful thrush, but Teba wouldn’t let her get a word in.“Listen, our elders didn’t always agree with your Hyrule King, but the stories tell that he was the man who was able to unite this place. But then he… then you all died. Those of us that lived retreated, burrowing into little pockets of safety while the kingdom at large withered away. Sounds like this Gerudo is the first one to take advantage of that."Zelda looked into the flames, suddenly aware of the expanse of the wilderness and the pervasive hunger of the darkness around them.She could imagine then, people living in a lost and dead kingdom, surrounded by ruins and monsters, the way of life that their grandparents once spoke of completely out of reach. She could imagine people her own age, fearing that they had no future, living under the shadow of a Calamity that could readily strike again, hearing of a new regime — a new power, lead by a charismatic young man, a Gerudo whose own ancestor had once styled himself King. It wouldn’t matter what they had to do to build a new world for themselves, who they had to kill or what ancient heritage they had to defile. What were a few atrocities, when their home had already been destroyed?She looked back to Teba’s troubled face and realised the thread of familiarity between them was being spun into something stronger. She realised then that he had understood for years what she was only now realising about her own home, and decided then she had no choice but to trust him. The alternative was forfeit, of her kingdom, her people and herself, to a usurper who she could never have anticipated.A shiver caught at the base of her spine, racing up towards her neck. Something shifted behind her, but when she turned, it was just the wind. ***Torchlight led them through the dark hallways of Hyrule Castle, and drunken verse sang them home. Wildwine, or what was left of it, flowed freely across the lips of Cinelgen's Successors, along with a motley mix of home brewed spirits and ales, downed in the absence of any other form of entertainment. The singing rang through the halls, some of it was little more than a bawdy rhyme, and some of it a hymn of old, but most of it nonsense. Inglis and Link walked in a tense silence back to the Royal Apartments after dinner, thoughts clouded by the singing and shouting until they rounded into a windowless hallway both out of sight of both the singers and Link's personal guards that waited by his room."You're still lying to Cinna about the code," Inglis said, matter-of-fact.Link shrugged and met Inglis' accusing glare. "Yeah?""I could tell him.""Then I'd tell them about Mila."Inglis winced, but then something changed on his face. A shift, marked by a flicker of a smile. "That's where we differ, Champion. They won't kill me for my mistakes."With a sharp shove, Inglis ushered Link back down the hallway, keeping his hand on Link's arm the entire way to his chamber. Link felt nails digging into skin, leaving half-moon impressions that made the message clear when he looked upon them later; you are not the one in control.No, he was not. Inglis need not repeat himself there. But Link still felt a small triumph when he flipped through his notebook on his desk and saw the phrases he had written in Sheikah Code – messages that his Guardian had communicated to him. Link wanted to savour this victory, pull it out and write it down as an example - look, see; I can do this. But then his chest began to throb, and running his hand over the still tender wounds reminded him of his constant and precarious situation.Link reviewed the week's work. He had started with his name. Link, or just L for short; ● ▬ ● ●The Guardian learned that fast enough, so he moved onto Inglis (●●) and Aurelia (●▬), though his guards were uneasy at being identified to the ancient war machine in their captivity, as much as Link assured them that it could not attack. Next came a tricky hurdle; the Guardian's name. When he asked, it rattled off a series of numbers."You're a little more special than that," he had told the Guardian. "I've got a better name for you."And with Inglis' halberd, he had written the name in the code. R-H-O-A-M-E-T. The Guardian looked down at the code, and then back to Link. Yes, he said, and with a broad and childish grin, Link had said, "Nice to meet you, Rhoamet.""You're crazy," Aurelia had said, rolling her eyes. "Naming it like it is a pet, and after the man who destroyed this kingdom."And maybe Link was a little reckless, but he just refused to believe this Guardian's identity ended at automaton. The Beasts have something like souls, he wrote in his notebook. So maybe he does too.But the Guardian's semi-consciousness was not the most surprising discovery, Link noted. It was the joy that he found in working with it. It was a puzzle, like so many things, but one he could solve. And for the first time in months, Link felt a clarity of spirit. A certainty. A return to purpose. He was raised a Knight – to help people, to fight for his kingdom, to preserve its wonders in the face of adversity. Restoring control over an ancient automaton was perhaps not the path Link would have chosen towards this purpose, but it was a path nonetheless.He tried to picture Zelda's reaction, but could not. All he could see was her face, soft lips pressed into a frown, long hair framing her eyes as green as the rolling fields. Habitually he rolled his left shoulder, feeling the throb of the arrow wounds. Mipha's power was yet to return, but the dreams, had not ceased. In fact they were strengthened since the fever had left. Being back in the Castle had tapped into something beneath the surface of his clearer memories, rendering his former life in tantalising snippets and half-remembered conversations. Mipha…I've been thinking…He'd written down what he could catch. It happened in the afternoon. The Zora Princess was there, or maybe not there but the topic of conversation. There were roses. And a song, strangely familiar. Tears on the cobblestones and red lips parted in shock. What did I do? What did I say? Whatever it was, Link felt half-afraid to find out. There were only so many situations that could fit what he remembered, and none of them pleasant. But he owed it to Mipha's memory to find that which eluded him. And now that he had convinced Cinelgen that he needed time to 'transcribe' the Guardian's code, he had the time to figure it out.His thoughts turned back to the evening just past. These days he dined exclusively with Cinelgen and his Hylian partners. It was a dance – always a dance – between playing the role of prisoner and extending himself into something and someone more. When he felt himself faltering, he remembered the example that Zelda had set; steadfast, but always polite, showing her enemies kindness rather than contempt.A week of cautiously teasing out the stories from Cinna taught Link that it wasn’t speaking that he needed to learn, but listening. He no longer met conversations with glaring silence, but now tried to be, or to seem, involved. It was as simple as the occasional nod and gentle coaxes of Ah yeah and Very interesting.And strangely, it was working. Link listened quietly as the progressively drunk Gerudo waxed lyrical on his youth, his exploits and most importantly his plans.The facts at face value were surprisingly haphazard. Cinelgen was raised among the Yiga, resented them, murdered their Secretary so Milagre could take their position, and then fled. He spent two years building a small legion of outcasts, and returned to exact his revenge.“Revenge?”“I know what you’re thinking, Hero,” Cinna drawled. “Oh, they raised you! They trained you! You can’t have murdered them all! Well I did. When I was young I longed for purpose, but the Yiga were wasting theirs. Dedicating their lives to Ganon? Pah! Terrorising people? A joke! There are greater things at play in Hyrule, so we cannot continue on as we are!”For the first time in a week, Link really was speechless. Had Cinna just said he murdered all of the Yiga? He had seen Yiga, hadn’t he? Or were they also pretenders? Link’s mind immediately went swimming for how to verify this, if it was even true.There was little to glean from Cinelgen’s compatriots. Milagre remained tight-lipped in Link's company, perhaps a little wearier than Cinelgen of Link's dual loyalties, or maybe she preferred silence too. And Inglis only spoke when spoken too; certainly, he had control over Link, but he was very much under Cinelgen's thumb.By the way they acted, Link wondered, earnestly, what kept the trio together.What do they owe each other? He wrote in his notebook and slid it under his pillow as he turned out his lamp. ***Precisely as Teba had predicted, they reached the Hebra Headspring in exactly one week. They passed the eastern camp first, finding it patrolled by a few Hylian's in blue and white neckerchiefs and snowquill gear. Teba however, decided that they would continue south until they reached the second bokoblin hideout.Zelda tried to ply from Teba his plans, but he would not tell her, much to her frustration. But she could no more make sriracha out of snow than she could make him tell her his innermost thoughts, so decided to give him space. Soon, the southern camp emerged from the dense cloud of mid-winter snow fall.The domed skull-like structure was abandoned, and within they found little more than scrap wood and empty jars. It was built at the edge of a cliff overlooking a vast lake that led to the Hebra Plunge. Zelda felt dizzy as she looked down at the enormous, towering waterfall and heard the churn of the water as it hit the rocks below. Beyond the cliffs, glittering faintly in the distance, she caught sight of Rito Village and Vah Medoh atop the high pillar. Feeling the chill of the morning air seep its way through the snowquill coat, she hoped they would be returning there soon, and turned back towards the hideout to find Teba and Tulin.The Rito Warrior was kneeling before his son, and as Zelda approached, she heard him explain why they had come all this way south."You must stay here. We will come back for you," He instructed a sniffling Tulin. "Do you understand?""Why can't I come with you?" Tulin demanded. He was crying again, and Zelda felt her heart render, and the urge to pull Tulin away, to shield him from the pain that was kindred between them."Dangerous, capable people are out here. I can't deal with them and you,” Teba took a deep breath. "You would be a burden."Tulin crossed his wings. "I'm not staying here! I'm not!""You cannot come with us, Tulin. Do you understand me?" Teba stood and glowered down at this son.“Is it safe?” Zelda ventured. “To leave him here?”Teba turned his leering gaze to her. “You want me to take my son to an encampment full of bandits?”“If we keep our distance it’ll be safe–”"And who said that was the plan?”“What plan, Teba!?”There was a weighty silence, as Tulin continued to sniffle, and Teba continued to glare. The Rito warrior gave her no answer, and turned back towards his son.“Flee, as soon as you see someone that isn't us. Do you understand me?"By now Tulin was hunched and shaking softly from his tears. I only want to help… he murmured, and when his father reached town to give him one was affectionate rustle of his crown feathers, Tulin shrunk away.“We’ll make him a fire and then we’ll go,” Teba said, turning to leave. "Don't say a thing," he muttered to Zelda as he passed. When she looked back, Tulin had huddled in close against the wall of the hideout, still sniffling.They hiked in silence towards the Eastern camp as the snow began to fall; it came thick and fast, and soon Zelda could see no more than ten feet ahead. Teba himself all but disappeared, his white feathers the perfect camouflage against the snow. Several hours passed before they were nearing the camp."I'd like to know your plan," Zelda said as they crossed a natural stone bridge spanned the rushing rivers of Hebra falls.All Teba said was, "Follow my lead.""I've been doing that for a week." Zelda bristled.“You’re not going to like it. The plan.”“I would dislike being left out more.”Teba stopped then, bracing one wing against the wall of the bridge, collecting himself. “You are so persistent, aren’t you?”Then he turned, and approached her slowly, assessing her with stern eyes. She narrowed her eyes at him, undaunted. This interrogative look was familiar and overplayed now; she had learned Teba was all squawk and no beak. “I’m aware I can be… difficult,” she said, calling his bluff. “If you want this mission to succeed, I need to be informed. That’s all there is to it.”The snow fell heavier, blowing cold wind between them; was she crazy, to follow this Rito? And to the edge of the world no less? When she could be back in warmer pastures in an instant?In the corner of her eye, Zelda caught the faint, haunting glow of Divine Beast Vah Medoh. She needed to prove the bandits were here, prove that Vah Medoh was in danger, and then maybe she could use it to take back her castle. And my knight.All the while she had been thinking, Teba seemed to solidify, barely moving as he considered his words. He took a breath, and said, “You’re the bait.”“The what—?”“Yahn’s looking for you.”“So you’re handing me over?!”“I’m leveraging my advantages.”A strategist through and through. Zelda brought a hand to her forehead. “Elaborate, please.”“You’re a diplomat, right?”Zelda nodded. Not a very good one.“Well, diplomacy is trade, and trade begins with common ground. We all want something. I’m no politician, but I know that much.”“And Yahn…” Zelda murmured, following his logic. “Yahn wants me.”“And me. I’ll provide him both.”“I thought we were just getting proof that they – that Cinelgen’s people are here! What use is there in confronting them?”“Proof? A few of those… photo-whatevers you call them won’t be proof. We need it from his beak!”“That’s too dangerous!”Teba swiped a wing to the side dismissively. “Not if you follow my lead. I’ll take you to Yahn. We’ll talk. Then I’ll get us out of there.”Zelda could hardly believe her ears. “How?”Teba threw his wings into a wide, casual shrug. “Who can say?”And then he jolted forward, grabbed her by the back of the scruff, lifting her just off the ground so she had no purchase. With his other wing, he grabbed her right hand by the wrist, and held tight.“TEBA!” Zelda screamed, flailing wildly, but to no avail. She tried to summon her powers, do something, but then she realised why he had grabbed her hand, and felt her stomach drop at the second realisation that now, she was at his mercy. “Let me go!”Teba said nothing, moving in an unknowable silence as he began dragging her towards the camp. The nearer they were to it the more Zelda’s terror rose, as the possibility that Teba had intended to do this all along became real to her. It crystalised into panic as from the snow the camp emerged; it was little more a handful of tents inside the domed, skull shape bokoblin camp, with a single fire under a bubbling iron pot, all enclosed by a ring of sharpened tree trunks. She cried and wailed and thrashed, but Teba was strong, and her fear was draining the strength from her limbs with alarming speed.The Hylian guards noticed the advancing duo and drew their feathered Rito swords, shouting for Teba and Zelda to halt."I've got business with one of your men,” Teba called out to them."Who'd that be?" one of the Hylians called back, his sword pointed in their direction."Yahn," Teba answered. "Rito Warrior. Black feathers. Kind of a smart-ass. Tell him I’ve come to talk.”"Who’s the girl?” demanded the second guard. Zelda was tiring, unable to fight any more, and she hung limply from Teba’s wing.“Yahn will know her.”“Well we don’t—!”"Stand down, men!" came a voice from behind the guards, and through the threshold emerged a Rito with jet-black feathers and a hooked orange and black beak. He was short for a Rito and stalked out past the retreating guards with one wing at his back, and the other in a sling. That's him, Zelda realised."Well, well," Yahn said, appraising the duo with a sly smile. "What have we here?"Yahn stood before them with a broad-shouldered green-feathered Rito at his left and a smaller, blue-feathered female Rito who was blind in one eye to his right. The two Hylian guards moved to stand behind Teba and Zelda, their swords still drawn."New apprentice?" Yahn said, taking stock of Zelda. I am Rowan, I am Rowan. Zelda is dead. Rowan lives. It was no use. Zelda’s eyes began to fill with tears."What do you care?" Teba said with a grin."You're right, I don't," Yahn sighed, the tension simmering between them regardless. "Why are you here, Teba?"The warrior shrugged. "Heard Rylen mention you," He nodded towards the green-feathered Rito. "Thought I'd come find you. See what you're up to. Learn more about this new cause of yours. But I couldn’t come without a gift. I found her at the Flight Range. I guess she was on the run.”Yahn rolled his eyes. "And I guess that’s your idea of a disguise, Princess?”A flash of anger spurred Zelda into another fit, doing her best again to free herself. “Release me!” she shrieked. “Traitor!”“Fine,” Teba grunted, and let go. The next Zelda knew she hit the snow, the bright sting of it burning her skin. She wanted to stand, to fight and free herself, but her efforts to free herself had left her whole body aching. And so she hunched limply in the snow before her captors.Yahn simply laughed. “This is impressive, teacher, but I don’t believe for a second you’re here to join us.”Teba drew back, shooting Zelda a nervous glance. And then he scowled, his casual façade dropped. "Go on then, Yahn. Why do you think I'm here?"Yahn's stern expression didn't falter; "You'll never let it drop, will you?" He looked to Zelda. "Does she know? Have you told her what you did, teacher?"What he did? Teba? Zelda swallowed her shock long enough to speak and to again lie. "My name is Rowan," she said, lips quivering. "I'm a bard from Necluda."Yahn stepped forward and squared up to her. He leant in so close that she could feel his breath, brows raised. "Really now? And I was so looking forward to seeing these powers of yours. Cinna spoke highly of them."She flinched, starting backwards, and from behind her she heard the Hylian guards shift across the snow-strewn dirt, their mail jangling under the movement. "I'm Rowan," Zelda repeated, her mouth suddenly dry."I'll bet," Yahn laughed, a wicked grin crossing his face. "A Hylian girl, travelling with Teba? I know my teacher well. He doesn't just mentor anyone.""Clearly at one point I exclusively mentored idiots," Teba spat. "But I’m here now. Tell me about this Cinelgen of yours.”“Oh, Teba,” Yahn said, preening himself idly, as if completely disinterested in them. "Can’t you just let it go? Let me go!? Yes, so I signed up to have some part in Hyrule’s future. I found someone better to follow than you and your brooding behind. Shouldn’t you be happy?”"What are you doing here?" Zelda breathed, barely able to speak. “What has Cinelgen sent you to do?”“Well if you must know,” Yahn placed a wings to his hip, standing proud. "Lots of things. We’ve been intercepting Rito couriers and sending them to Hyrule Castle, so they can join our cause. We need control of skies, so we can’t have any competition. In exchange we would be given Hebra once he took over Hyrule, simple really. Oh and he wanted someone to find you! And that’s me!" He gave Zelda a discordantly gleeful look.The victory stung; Zelda had been right that Yahn aiding Cinelgen, but all it meant was that the Gerudo's reach had extended even further across Hyrule. Zelda bit her lip to stifle the anger, an old piece of advice from her father in her mind. Never show your enemy contempt. Never show that they have affected you.When he saw that neither Zelda nor Teba had given any reaction to this, Yahn’s grin fell to a deathly glare. “Kill her,” he said coolly, to whoever would heed the order. “Cinna doesn’t care if she lives.”Teba was there before her in an instant. “No!” he said and Zelda watched in shock as he fronted up to Yahn, towering over him, daring him to move. “I…I want my reward first.”Zelda fought down the urge to smile. Maybe he had not crossed her after all.Yahn simply growned. “You’ve really upset me today, Teba.”“What the hell are you talking about?” Zelda noticed he was tensed, his right wing held just back a little, to be closer to his bow.“I mean really, you wanted to join us? The great righteous Teba?” Yahn went on, sadness seeping into his words then. “Ten years I hear nothing from you, and then this. I was so happy when we spotted you on our patrols, a few days back. But, it’s all a lie isn’t it? Otherwise, why did you tell your son you’d be coming back?”Zelda felt her stomach drop. No!"What have you done with Tulin?!" Teba demanded, surging forward. The Rito and Yahn's side drew their weapons – twin Rito bows – and each nocked an arrow."Nothing, yet. Rylen and Orli here spotted you with him, heard you speaking with him," Yahn motioned to his Rito companions. "We've been waiting for you." Yahn then turned to Rylen. "Has someone been dispatched to fetch this uh—Tulin, is it?""They have," the broad-shouldered Rito nodded, and with a furious snarl, Teba became a blur as he drew his bow and fired.Yahn dodged, and the camp electrified. Rylen loosed an arrow towards Teba, as did the blue-feathered Rito named Orli, but Zelda raised her hand just in time, and the arrows snapped against a light barrier that she erected between them.Yahn was howling with laughter. "There she is! The Princess!" he cried, eyes fixed on the Royal Crest on her hand.Teba leapt to his left, dodging arrow fire and evading the pursuing Hylian guards. "Tulin!" he shouted at Zelda, and wasting not another second, he launched himself skyward, with Rylen and Orli in pursuit. Zelda turned, and bolted left through the snow, sprinting around the reach of the Hylian guards, drawing her Sparrow bow as she ran. The guards loped through the snow after her, but were slowed by heavy armour, struggling to draw their own bows.Above, Teba was soaring towards the south, dipping and rolling through the air as he dodged arrow fire from the pursuing Rito. Hands shaking and breath haggard, Zelda nocked an arrow into her bow and loosed it back towards the Hylian guards. It missed, disappearing into the snow without a sound. She drew another, yelping as an arrow whizzed past her face. As she rounded the stone bridge, she leapt over another volley of arrows and turned south towards the second bokoblin camp once she had crossed the river.One of the Hylians, a man with blonde braided hair, was pulling ahead of his colleague and was nearing her. Fighting panic, Zelda nocked the second arrow and turned once again, taking a second to line up the shot. The forest was rushing towards her. She loosed the arrow, and it tore through the Hylian's chest; he tumbled, kick up snow and dirt, and went down without a sound.Zelda’s heart was a war drum. Her hands could barely grip her bow, but still she ran. The trees were thick around her then, but beyond she caught a glimpse of the shimmering blue lake that she knew lead down to the Hebra Plunge. There was a cry above and Zelda looked skywards. There were only two Rito above her; the green-feathered Rylen and the blue-feathered Orli. And then, half camouflaged against the snow, she caught sight of something plummeting from the sky. She watched in horror as Teba crashed down through the trees, pines and broken branches raining down to the snow.Above she heard Rylen calling something down to them. "Pull back!" he was saying. "Come here! Take these!" And Zelda realised he was not addressing her but rather the remaining Hylian behind her. She looked back and saw the guard slow his steps, and retreat. The still airborne Rito were swooping down towards the trees. Teba had fallen in a heap at the edge of the forest, but he was alive. She fell at his side, hauling him up with all her strength."We're almost there!" she said. "Can you fly?""No," Teba winced. "But nothing's broken." When he stood, Zelda saw that his wings were bloodied and torn, a broken arrow rising out of the feathers. "C'mon, we need to reach Tulin." he urged, and they continued down the path towards the camp. Through the haze of the snow, the southern bokoblin camp had begun to emerge, as had the sound of the roaring Hebra plunge.As they hobbled forward, Zelda looked back through the trees. Rylen, Orli and the remaining Hylian had regrouped and were advancing on foot. When they saw her, they surged forward, nocking strange, bulbous arrows into their bows that rained sparks down into the snow, and Zelda became aware of the sound of a quiet hiss. Bomb arrows."Teba!" she shrieked. "RUN!"And then without warning the first arrow connected with a tree in front of them that exploded in a shower of sparks and splinters. Together, she and Teba leapt over the fallen trunk. The second landed behind them and sent a wave of heat searing across the back of Zelda's neck. And the third thankfully soared past, out over the cliff that led down to the Hebra Plunge.Cresting the final hill before the southern bokoblin camp, Teba and Zelda scrambled down a path that skirted the edge of the cliff. Zelda tried, and failed, not to look at the lake below, the sound of the Hebra Plunge filling the air. Faintly in the distance, she spied two Rito; an adult, grey of feather, hauling a small white fledgeling from the bokoblin camp."Tulin!" Teba roared, and he bolted forwards along the path.Zelda's chest burned, as did the Royal Crest on her right hand, reignited when she had raised a light barrier to protect Teba at Yahn's camp. She felt herself slowing, unable to keep pace, panting and shouting with a hollow voice for Teba to wait. But he was too far ahead now.She looked back one last time and saw that Rylan had drawn another bomb arrow. The snow was falling in her eyes. The air was frozen. There was nothing to do but watch.Eyes focused and burning, Rylan loosed the arrow from his proud Rito bow. It seemed to float past, whistling and hissing, the sparks drawing a bursting, shimmering line through the air. Then it was falling, arcing down, down, down. And helpless Zelda watched as the arrow landed at Teba's feet, the explosion launching him up and over the precipice, down to the lake below.She tried to cry out, but she couldn't even scream. Her voice was gone. Tulin was shrieking for her, calling for his father as the grey-feathered Rito dragged him away from the camp. Teba's limp body was forty feet below, floating towards the roaring Hebra Plunge. Behind her, the bandits in pursuit were readying another round of arrows. Zelda felt her limbs seize; her throat clam up with fear; her aching legs beg for her to keep moving forward. To flee for her life. But she couldn't.
Dammit, Teba.
Zelda skidded to a stop. Deftly, as Link had taught her, and with a little bit of improvisation that she had taught herself, Zelda raised a shield and pushed it towards her pursuers. Rylen, Orli and the Hylian guard all smacked into the shimmering barrier one after the other, landing hard against the ground, their arrows broken and bows forgotten. And then, cursing under her breath, she turned towards the cliff, towards the shimmering lake and the thunderous Hebra plunge – towards the Rito Warrior who would lose his life if she did not make this choice to trust him once and for all – and she leapt.
Don't look. Don't think. Just fall.
I'm screaming, but where's my voice? Water in my mouth. Ice against my skin. Goddess, this cold! I can't swim! Damn you, Teba, where are you? Goddess damn you. You had better be alive.
Heavy. I'm so heavy. I can't think, only feel. But I'm afloat. And there you are! I can see you, Teba. I can reach you; I can, I can, I can. Link would, so I must. Just a little further. Just a little further…
I've got you. I've got you! There's my voice! I've got you, Teba! Are you alive? Please be alive! Hold onto me. We're going to fall. I can't fly, and now neither can you. Here it comes. Can you hear it? That's the Plunge.
You're a fool, Teba. Walking into that camp. Leaving your son behind. A big fool. But I've got you. I've got us both. We'll land in the water, on the rocks. We'll land hard, but I can protect us. Here we go. Don't look, Teba. Just fall.
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
Under the snow of winter, Hyrule shone. Brighter than any gem. Brighter even than Death Mountain itself. From the lower cliffs of the Eldin mountains, he could see it all; the rolling hills, the jagged mountains, the Beasts on the skyline, the Sheikah Towers with their sapphire peaks that sprung up across the landscape like the flowers of spring.Yunobo had never set foot beyond the base of the mountains. Though not for lack of wanting. There was just no need - at least, not yet. Some Gorons travelled; merchants and traders who sold gems from the Goron mines to the other races of Hyrule. But most Gorons did not.He squinted the brilliance of the snow and wondered what it would be like to touch. It didn't snow on the mountain; the lava made the air so hot that any rain turned to steam. But he wondered what it would be like to feel the frozen ground at his feet. To feel cold. To shiver at the brutal winter. Would he need a coat? He had never worn a coat. He had never seen another of his brothers wearing much more than rags. Looking down at the lowlands of Hyrule, Yunobo wondered if he would ever find the answers he sought.The ground began to shake, loose rocks shifting between his feet. Behind him, the colossal Death Mountain rumbled, and all of Eldin shook in response. Yunobo turned to look and saw Divine Beast Vah Rudania perched precariously on the volcano's precipice. In the soles of his feet, he felt a shudder from deep within the earth, and a shower of lava came bursting forth from the mountain. Flaming rocks soared high above into the air, leaving bright red streaks against the sky, before crashing back down harmlessly into the volcano.It was nothing; just Death Mountain saying hello. A real eruption hadn't occurred for thousands of years, or so the boss said, and if the mountain really were to blow, there'd be no Goron City left.He looked up and saw that Rudania had not moved. It had not done so since the day of the attack on Hyrule Castle. Yunobo had seen it from an outpost near the Beast itself. Bludo had made it his job to monitor Vah Rudania - though Yunobo had no idea how to do that, or what to do if anything happened - and he'd been halfway up his daily hike to visit the Beast when Rudania had unleashed an enormous, blistering ray of power right into Hyrule Castle. All the Beasts had; the camel in the South, the bird in the West, and the elephant in the East. And in that moment of immense power, all Yunobo could think was, imagine if they'd missed.Afterwards, he'd asked the boss what they were going to do about Vah Rudania, and Bludo had roared with laughter, clapping Yunobo on the back. "Nothing, boy!" he cried. "The last time we bothered it, it almost sent half of Death Mountain raining down on us!" And Yunobo didn't question; the boss was right after all. With the aid of the Champion Link, they had managed to make the problem go away. Why do anything more?Yunobo had never been much of a thinker. He could admit that. He liked to simply find the world beautiful, not wonder how it came to be, or what it could become. But Rudania – and the Champion - had made Yunobo think; shouldn't I be doing more? He was descended from Lord Daruk, wasn't he? The Goron Champion of old, who had fought bravely against Ganon? Wasn't I brave, when Link and I pushed Rudania into the mountain?The sun was past the zenith. Yunobo only had an hour for a break, and he knew he was already pushing his luck by travelling so far from the mines. Turning his back on the lowlands, he tucked his limbs in close and rolled his way through the rocky hills and bubbling hot springs, back to the bustling Goron City.Bludo's house was packed to the brim when he arrived; his brothers pressed in close around the boss as they laughed, and told stories of showmanship and strength. But the topic today, it seemed, was graver than normal."They shut down that new bridge entirely! Can you believe it Bludo? All of Gerudo completely cut off! I only just got out in time!" One of the travelling traders had pushed to the front of the crowd, his pack overstuffed with gems. Yunobo caught sight of a diamond, peeking out over the top of the bag."Of course I can believe it, Kairo" Bludo said to the trader. "My Father told me only two things are certain in Hyrule: the rumble of the mountain and the pride of the Zora!"Bludo's house erupted with a round of laughter, low guffaws that were almost an earthquake unto themselves. Yunobo pushed his way through the crowd."Zora's Domain shut as well," Kairo went on. "My whole trip, wasted!""Even the Hylians in Hateno were hesitant to trade," said another Goron, his pack as full as the first trader's. "What's the use, they said, when it sounds like there's another Calamity around the corner?""Well that's just nonsense," scoffed Bludo. "This is a petty squabble, nothing more.""I don't know about that, Bludo," the first trader, Kairo shrugged. "There was fighting, at the Gatepost Town Ruins. I saw it myself, boss. Gerudo travellers, and some Zora soldiers on the way to the Bridge. All were bloodied, but they broke it up before anyone died!"Bludo pounded his fist in an open palm. "Squabbles! Bickering among fools!""Isn't the Zora King dead?" Yunobo finally said, feeling as though the room had turned to look. "I mean, it sound pretty bad to me."Bludo's face had darkened; the boss was evidently not fond of such grim conversation. "It doesn't affect us. We don't rely on trade, not the Gorons. We trade as a courtesy." Bludo leant back in his rocky chair. "We will wait this out. Let them butt heads, let them bruise, pick themselves up, and return as they were.""You don't think we should do something?" Yunobo pressed. "This sounds serious, boss.""What could we do, Yunobo? Tell them to stop!?" Bludo slammed his fist down against the arm of his chair. The other Gorons were laughing once again."But it just isn't right! To do nothing!"Bludo shook his head. "Doing something isn't always better," He looked at the clock. "But anyway, break's over boys!"Bludo signalled to a Goron at the edge of the room, and soon the rambunctious blare of a brass horn sounded through the city. The Gorons filed out of the house, rolling or walking back to their work. Yunobo began to follow, but Bludo caught him with a hand to his shoulder."Listen, Yunobo," he said with a smile, "If you want something to do, go check on Rudania again. Take Aji and Grido. They won't shut up about getting a closer look."Begrudgingly, Yunobo led the brothers towards the Bridge of Eldin to climb the mountain. Once they passed the bridge, it became too steep to roll, and the rumbles that continued to come from the volcano made the hiking slow. But eventually, they reached the top, to where the Beast was huddled against the edge."Wouldja look at that, Aji?" grinned Grido. "I almost agree with wide-eyes over here, shame we aren't allowed to pilot it. Remember when it was walking around the mountain?"Aji thumped his chest. "Aye, course. Raining rocks down on us from dawn to dusk!""How do you think we would pilot it?" Yunobo asked, gazing up at Rudania's conical face."Who knows, goro?" Grido shrugged."Nobody living," Aji added.That isn't true, Yunobo thought, though he had no idea where Link was, or how to find him. In any case, the Champion was probably out doing what Yunobo could not; helping end this strange conflict in the lowlands. That's what heroes do, Yunobo concluded.The trio of Gorons reached the peak and approached Rudania's front legs to make the climb into the Beast. But just as they reached the stone colossus, the glowing lights that covered its body suddenly flickered, and with a warbling groan, the Beast lowered its head and powered down.
Don't think. Just fall.
Warrior and Princess arced down from the waterfall edge like a pair of falling stars, wrapped in a desperate embrace, half-enveloped by a gleaming barrier of light.Zelda had her right hand out in front of them; the Royal Crest shone, and from its brilliance she raised a curved shield, inwardly praying that it would hold when they landed. Beneath her, Teba was still unconscious, unable to help slow the descent.The air streamed past her long ears, the shock of the cold setting her skin alight. She had almost been winded when they crested over the lip of the waterfall, the air hitting her chest like a hammer. But she held Teba as tight as she could, and chose, for once, to believe that she had made the right choice.When they hit the rocks, Zelda didn't feel a thing, except the shudder of the impact, and the flood of icy water against her skin as they bounced into the water. She was plunged deep beneath the surface and - for a suspended, terrifying moment - her vision went black. She flailed against the churn of the waters, reaching out helplessly to try and find Teba amongst the chaos.As sudden as the fall itself, he was there before her - awake, eyes swimming with questions. In the absence of the ability to ask - where and how and why - he wrapped a wing around her and pulled her upwards. Zelda surrendered into his grip, her part in their survival complete. Together, they broke the surface of the lower lake of the Hebra Plunge. The cliffs were pressed in close, the water around them seemingly endless. Zelda gasped and swallowed water, assaulted by the relentlessness of it."Tulin!" Teba called to her, but Zelda shook her head."Too late," she managed between shallow breaths as she struggled to stay afloat. Her limbs screamed in protest, icy water driving deep into her skin. Zelda could barely see, barely breathe. The water was everywhere."We need to go back!" Teba insisted."No!" Zelda swam frantically, pulling Teba forwards. The shore in the distance seemed so small, so far away, and the lake so vast. He was resisting, treading water and looking back up the waterfall. "Teba!" she cried. Her lungs were empty of air, filling with water. With a last desperate breath, "Please. I can't."At last her strength gave out, and she slipped beneath the water again, until Teba wrenched her back up."On my back!" he said as the water drained from her eyes. Without argument Zelda managed to wrap her arms around Teba's neck, flailing against the waves to slump against him. In long arcs Teba brought his wings across the surface, carrying them to the shore. Under her dead weight he seemed to struggle, and by the time he had deposited her onto the greyed sand, he was panting."The hell did you-huff-come after me for?" Teba demanded, pressing himself up onto his knees. He heaved through another round of pants. "If you can't-huff-swim?!"Zelda lay on her back, head sinking in the sand. She felt it chafe against her neck. "I had to," she breathed. "You would have died.""I was fine," Teba said. He stood from the shore and peered over his shoulder, across the mirror-like surface of the lake. "We need to go back."Shaking, Zelda propped herself up onto her elbows. "Rocks, Teba," she rasped. "We hit the rocks!""We couldn't have," Teba shook his head. He was a motley mix of reds and blacks and browns, Zelda noticed, from the arrows and the debris and the burns. "If we hit the rocks we'd be dead.""What do you think happened?" She was incensed, rattling like a leaf in the wind.When she spoke, she felt the blue of her lips."I don't know, I-""Do you think we just missed them, somehow?" Zelda went on, clambering weakly to her feet. She thrust her palm towards Teba, conjuring another curved light barrier."Look!" She pressed harder, making him look at it. "I saved you. Saved us!"Her hands were trembling, and soon her power gave out, the barrier shattering into mist. She fell to her knees, broken under the exhaustion, shivering ferociously at the cold that pervaded her soaked gear."Okay, okay, crap," Teba rushed forward to catch her, wrapping an injured wing around her and pulling her once more to her feet. "I'm sorry, Rowan, I'm sorry I just-" his voice broke, and he keened over, shuddering through a sudden, visceral sob. "This is all my fault. It's all me. Dammit, Rowan. My son…"They sat huddled together on the shore, both broken and shivering. The water was lapping at Zelda's feet. Around them, the snow was still falling. A snowflake landed on her lips, sending a pique of pain blossoming on her cracked skin."Let's go, come on," she muttered through chattering teeth. She eyed the towering cliffs. "We need to find shelter."Arm over wing, they stumbled together away from the lake, finding a small cave hollowed out into the rocks of the cliffs. By the time they made it out of the snow and into the shelter, Zelda was shaking uncontrollably, her limbs swollen and sore. The cold was burning - she supposed that was why she felt warm somehow; warm, and sleepy, and soft. Teba released his hold of her, and she curled up on the floor of the cave, huddling into herself."Huh? Oh, no, no…!" Teba muttered, gripping her by the shoulders, attempting to unravel her from her cocoon. "Don't drift off."Zelda fought to keep her eyes open. "The Slate…" she whispered. "L-Link always kept… f-firewood."She closed her eyes, and Teba shook her again. "Where is it?" he pressed. He felt warm. He was holding her, his warm feathers against her. Zelda's eyelids fluttered open, and she saw blue.
Your dedication is quite impressive, Princess. And dedication deserves its own reward.
"I just wish I knew what to do," Zelda murmured, speaking to a long-lost voice. "You always seem so sure…""The Slate! C'mon, please," Teba pleaded. She wasn't hearing him. You will find a way, said the voice."Father says it's my destiny…"The world shook. Her head was a storm, waves crashing against a stony shore. "It's Zelda, isn't it? Your real name?" came a gruff voice from above. "Stay with me, Zelda."
Well, I happen to believe in destiny, even when it deigns to work against me.
"I'm sorry, Revali," Zelda murmured. "You're still my friend.""Zelda!"She blinked. Teba was beside her. The dream dissipated."I-I'm s-sorry.” She reached to her belt and found the Slate hidden underneath the red Rito sash wrapped around her waist and handed it to Teba. "In the… in the inventory… you’ll find it.She laid back on the cold ground, consciousness fading.I believe in you," she whispered, and to whom she spoke she wasn't sure.It was nighttime when Zelda woke, and she opened her eyes to a swath of orange-red light and the sensation of searing heat against skin. Her arms were bare. When she sat up, she found that her boots were gone and that the outer layer of her snowquill gear - the chest piece and the downy coat and pants - were drying on the floor by the fire next to her. Teba was sitting on the other side of the fire, cross-legged, preening his feathers. She looked down and realised that all she wore were her cotton leggings and a still-damp bodice."Did you do this?" she said weakly, almost accusing. A gust blew past the cave entrance, howling, and in the distance, the lake brightened under a flash of lightning.Teba raised a brow. "You wanted me to let you freeze?"She wrapped her arms around herself, reminding herself of where they were, and how close they had already come to death; the concern suddenly feeling petty.She placed a hand on the snowquill gear. It was still wet, almost entirely soaked through. Her head throbbed. "How… how long?" she asked."Couple hours."The Sheikah Slate was lying by her side, its purpose to Teba spent. She switched it on and looked through the inventory for some dry clothes. Her white shirt and royal blouse were still among the items; she hadn't worn them since before she and Link set off for Hyrule Castle. Zelda frowned at the fine clothes. Perhaps they would fit in size, but not in spirit.So in the absence of anything else to wear, Zelda donned Link's Champion tunic and undershirt, finding her old black pants and leather travelling boots in the inventory. The tunic smelt of earth, and grass, of horsehair and sea salt. It smelt of the fields of Central Hyrule, of the rain of Akkala, the salts of Lanayru and the spices of Gerudo. She wrapped her arms around herself, and for a moment he was with her.The familiarity brought comfort and loss in equal measure; the memories of her time with him reminding her that she had never stopped to appreciate any of it. Hyrule at their feet, alone in the world save each other; all relegated to memory, just like everything else."Now you look even more like him, Sparrow," Teba commented, and Zelda's eyes stung with tears. She wiped them away insolently, refusing to cry. She had been determined to weep no longer, determined to silence the sorrow within herself. Rowan had no need for tears, but then who was she kidding? Rowan never existed. Zelda would have to do."I hope he is having a better time than we are," she muttered, resting her head on her knees.A grunt came from across the fire, and Zelda looked up to see Teba gripping the arrow still embedded in his wing. She realised only then how badly injured he truly was. The feathers on his left side were either singed or missing entirely, burnt away by the bomb arrow that had exploded at his feet. Dotted across his wings were spots of blood, and there was gash across his right shoulder. In his left was the broken arrow, though he had snapped off the sharp tip. Teba breathed hard to steel himself, and, pinching the skin around where the arrow had pierced him, he pulled the shaft from his wing, beak clenched tight to stifle his groan."Do you need any help?" Zelda asked. "There might be something in the Slate.""It's fine. Superficial. The arrow hit cartilage. Hurts, yeah, but won't leave a mark."But still Teba hissed as he gingerly tested his wing, and Zelda crawled around the fire to his side, taking the Sheikah Slate with her. "I've got bandages," she said, motioning to the deep cut on his shoulder. "You can't let that get infected."Teba shifted his right side towards her and nodded for her to begin. Materialising a roll of bandages from the Slate, Zelda set to work."I should apologise," Teba said, looking into the fire. "I… I made a mistake, and I made you go along with it. We're here because of me. I know what you must think."Zelda nodded, feeling a smile tease the corners of her lips. "I happen to think you're a fool." She pressed a layer of gauze over the cut and expected Teba to flinch. He did not move. "But I think we're all foolish around the people we care about, Teba. And I know you still care about Yahn.”"You speaking from experience?" Teba asked, clearly deflecting."I am," Zelda admitted."Link?""Who else?" she said with a laugh, though her eyes stung. His name still hurt. She began to wrap the bandages around Teba's shoulder. "We were both fools. And looking back… I don't know what kept us together. All we did was argue.""That's normal, trust me," Teba said, the implication clear; I'm married."Really? You don't think people should get along?""It's not about 'getting along'," Teba said. He winced, but then sat up straighter, and Zelda knew what it meant. Storytime."Listen," he said, and Zelda listened. "When I began to court Saki, I was the best warrior in the village. No one had a better eye than me. No one was faster than I was. But once she accepted I… I dunno - I slacked off. I had a girl, and the showmanship, it felt unnecessary. I still trained but I didn't improve. She soured, she was always on my case - you should do this, why don't you help Kaneli with that, you should work on your spearmanship, I'm worried you could be injured in a hunt. When we argued about it, I thought it meant we weren't right. But you know what she told me? I fight with you because I know you, and I know the best you, and I want that Teba to be my husband. That was how it happened, actually. I didn't propose," he chuckled sadly. "Saki demanded the best of me, and the best version of me was married to her.""I fight with you because I know you…" Zelda repeated, looking out to the waters beyond the cave. Because I love you.It was as simple as that, and she was stunned by how natural it felt. How normal. And as quick as the revelation had come, it had passed. Shock subsiding into acceptance; a truth long known. Zelda looked down and realised she had stopped working the bandages and was holding them limply between her fingers. They began to shake, but not from the cold."She challenged me," Teba went on. "Had things not… gone wrong with Yahn, those years ago. Had I not… stopped caring…"Zelda finished with the bandages, securing them as tightly as she could. The tears were rolling down her cheeks and she no longer cared. She shook with rage; at the world, and at herself.Fighting, she realised, always came to an end, one way or the other. More often than not with tears. But a partnership founded on that could not be sustainable. She didn’t want to fight any more; she wanted to heal."Then fix things, Teba," she said."Oh, simple as that," he retorted. "Tulin is either dead or hates me, and Saki will never forgive me either way.""Will you listen to yourself!?" she snapped. Teba recoiled away from her, affronted, but Zelda did not let up. "Of course Tulin is struggling. You don't believe in yourself.""Zelda," Teba chided, frowning. "Don't-""You said Saki demands the best of you; well, I do too!" She was livid then. How dare he wield her own name against her! "And I know that might not matter, you don't have to pretend we're friends-""Listen, that isn't fair-""But you push people away because you think it will make you strong. You tell them you don’t have time for them, for some reason, even though you waited all your life for them. You tell them you don't love them because the alternative is that they may not love you, and then you regret it all and–""I think you're projecting now-""So what if I am?" she cried, her voice booming through the cave. "I'm not the one afraid to rescue my own son!""Alright, enough!" Teba barked. "Damnit, I am not that heartless. Of course we're going to get Tulin.""Good!" Zelda nodded. And then, tight-lipped, her hands clasped together. "Good. That's what… ahem… that was what I was expecting.""Good. I’m glad you were able to get that out," Teba said wryly, amused by the outburst. "And listen, you've saved my life twice now, Sparrow. I'm not pretending we're friends," he placed a wing on her shoulder, adding, "But don't tell Kass, alright, we have a bet on it."Zelda grinned. You big fool. She leant back, resting on her hands, feeling the cold stone of the cave."Well, now that we're friends," she said, "You’re going to tell me what happened with Yahn."Teba shifted, receding from her, but Zelda placed a hand on his wing, and he relented, his back straightening once more. "It isn't a nice story," Teba warned."I have room for one more tragedy," Zelda said."You sound like Kass," he snickered, and then sighed. "But… alright."Teba began the tale as Zelda materialised another log of firewood from the Slate, throwing it into the fire."I was young. Like I said, the best warrior in the village. Saki encouraged me to take on an apprentice. I wasn't sure, but she seemed to think it was a good idea. Yahn's father Yinli was a family friend. And Yahn was… how do I put this… an under-achiever. Yinli thought that since I was the best, I would be the best choice.""Yinli…" Zelda murmured. The name seemed familiar. She sifted through the catalogue of names and faces she had encountered. Larella, Nell, Paya, Leena… where did this name fit?Teba continued, eyes fixed on the gradually rising flames. "Yahn was only a teenager, but he was a good enough student. He learned quickly. We had him wielding a mechanical Falcon within a year, and he always said he'd soon good enough for his father's bow. Yinli was happy. Yahn was happy. I married Saki. We had Tulin. It was a good time."But times always change, and time always changes, Zelda thought, anticipating the rest.Teba's voice softened, and his hardened face sunk. "Maybe I didn't push him hard enough. Maybe I made too many excuses. He started slowing down, slacking off, and I told myself that maybe tomorrow he'd be better." He began to ball his wingtips into fists. "I avoided Yinli. I dreaded lessons. I tried to solve the problem by ignoring it. When I realised that he was just bored, it was too late. And he just… quit. He left. Said he was no longer interested, and that he was going to travel for a while and come back when he was ready. And I… lost it. I told him he was pathetic, an embarrassment to the village, that he had a choice; be a warrior or be nothing. We fought, not with words. I don’t remember who started it. Over the years I’ve come to believe it was probably me. I caught him on the wing, I saw blood on the ground. It was bad. Really, really bad. He fled and… I never saw him again."When he was done, Teba looked down at his fists and, slumping forward, he crossed his wings at his chest.Zelda spoke as gently as she could. "How long ago did this happen?""Just under ten years.""Teba…" Zelda sighed. "You've held onto it this long?""Well, it's like you said," Teba shrugged, his drawn face lifting into a weak smile when he looked at her. "We're fools for the people we care about.""And did you see him after that?""No, but sometimes I heard about him. His wing never really healed. He gave up archery. The last time I saw his father, Yinli, he said that Yahn leaving the village was the best thing he'd ever done.""You could never have meant for any of that to happen," Zelda assured him."Maybe. But it was still my fault," Teba began to collect himself, resuming the facade of the unfeeling warrior. But Zelda saw the cracks and the sorrow that infiltrated the wall he had built around himself. Teba went on, "And even then, part of me blamed Saki. She told me to take on an apprentice, after all. And things changed between us. I thought with Tulin; I might have a second chance. I resolved to work harder. To not fail my son the way I failed Yahn. And… well…""You haven't yet failed your son. You know that, don't you?" Zelda told him. She felt the sorrow catch, the ache in her chest where she shared in Teba's pain, and in a small voice, she said, "Tulin loves you. He risked his life just to be with you."Teba sighed. "Too many people throwing themselves at death for me," he said. He lifted his wings, testing them again, wincing at the pain, but conquering it. "Time to repay the favour."***The hungry flames within his lamp ate the paper, devouring the letters and symbols, turning them into black ash that Link rubbed into the floor of his bedchamber with the toe of his boot.Now there was no Sheikah Code but the one he held in his mind; the one Robbie had taught him. He sat down at his desk and peered through the tiny window towards West Hyrule. By the dim candlelight he could just make out the concentric swirls, and arcing lines etched in Divine Beast Vah Medoh. He looked and told himself to feel nothing. The sky was beginning to brighten. Inglis would be there to fetch him soon.They'd served him honey with his porridge for breakfast that morning, and he'd failed to remain unaffected. Forget her, he demanded of himself. But the smell of it was a punch to the gut, and a warm embrace, and a lance through the heart all at once; he could practically hear her laughter and see her red cheeks, her fingers dug into the hexagonal cells of the beehive as the honey and apples boiled in the pot. Goddess, Link, what a mess we've made."One giant mess," Link whispered to the girl in the memory. "That's all it is."And then she was gone, just like the afternoon in Hyrule Field, cooking honey apples and chatting away – or maybe listening to her talk, not that he’d ever minded.Taking a pen in hand, Link made a new list of symbols. Those which he had already 'decoded'. His name, Inglis' name, Aurelia's name, the symbols for yes, no, stop, danger, TB-DOWN, amongst other things; the curved Hylian alphabet with its Sheikah Code counterpart. Just enough to show some progress. Not enough to be what Cinelgen needed.And then, flipping through the pages, he found his page of questions. Is it alive? Does it have a name? Crossed out, with Rhoamet written beside it. Can it speak? Can it think?What would she think of all this? That was crossed out too. No time for memories. Not anymore.And then below, fingers tracing the writing, he read the next set of questions,Who were they before they came here? What do they owe each other?The Akkalan boy, the Yiga woman, and the Gerudo man; his captors, and the leaders of the bandits. The Trio. Inseparable. But were they? Difficult to know. Link had begun collecting the answers in tidbits during their dinner conversations but wrote none of it down. The details came in snippets, in slips of the tongue. Cinna and Mila became bladed Yiga in the same year; Inglis was from Akkala. Cinna taught Inglis to fight. Mila held some position of power among the Yiga, Secretary? But only since recently. Cinna is fond of cinnamon because it's best when you don't notice it, but overpowering when too much is added."You can see he takes his namesake a little too seriously," Mila had quipped to Link, lips pressed thin, a fondness amongst her disapproval.Beneath the questions, Link wrote a single conclusion: Maybe they're not as complex as they seem.There was a rap on his door - finally - and instinctively, Link snapped the notebook shut. The sun was well and truly up by the time Inglis arrived, and he had a strange colour to his face, his neat brown hair a little askew.Link grinned at him, eyebrows raised. His smile said: I know why you're late."We going or what?" Inglis said sternly."Lead the way," Link smirked.The questions played on his mind. Who were you? A few months ago, Cinelgen's bandits had seemed like an irrepressible force. But he'd seen them, all of them. He'd seen them slobber over their food at dinner and down wine in barrels. They were just people. Even the Yiga in their angry reds, their eyes hungry as they watched Link pass. Just people; just idiots like him, trying their best to survive.So who was Inglis?"You and Mila have fun this morning?" Link goaded as they walked through the carpeted hallways of the Royal Apartments. Inglis was on him in a second, quick as ever, strong-arming Link up against the fading wallpaper that smelt of ruin and sawdust. It was as simple as a jab to the ribs and a sharp shove to push Inglis off of him.He frowned as he watched Inglis regain his footing, the concern genuine. "You need to calm down, Inglis," he said. "Isn't Cinna your friend?""At least I have friends," Inglis shot back, dusting himself off, readjusting his already dishevelled tunic. Must have really gone for it, Link thought.Inglis wrapped a tight hand around Link's arm, and began ushering him back down the hallway; he had lost the privilege of walking without binds."I had friends, actually," Link muttered as they walked out into the Eastern Passage. "You put them in the Lockup.""Is that why you haven't decided to escape yet?" Inglis teased. "Afraid of what we'll do to them?""No," Link answered. Not that you would do anything to them, Inglis."Then why not?"Link shrugged and spoke like the words meant nothing. "Hyrule is a mess. The Princess is dead. Maybe it's alright here." He wiggled out of Inglis' grip. "When you're not jumping me."Inglis regarded him with muted scepticism, but Link returned the gaze with an empty smile. The Hylian puffed out his cheeks and shook his head. "No wonder Cinna likes you," he resigned as they neared the Gatehouse. "You're just as crazy as he is."Link chewed his lip, peering up at the Castle. He thought of the automaton waiting for him. He thought of the simmering civil tensions in the lands beyond. He thought of the Princess out there, somewhere, dealing with his decision to send her away. And he thought of the plan in his head. Maybe I am.Rhoamet greeted him with a a single raised leg and a now familiar pattern; ●●●●, ●▬●●
Hello Link
"Hey buddy," Link replied. "Diagnostic? Beam still broken?"▬ ● ▬ ▬; YesLink did a quick scan of the room. Aurelia was sat cross-legged against the Gatehouse wall, inspecting the finish of the curved blade of her halberd. She had started to wear her blonde hair long, and it shone in the morning light. She was one of the only Yiga with hair like that, and he’d noticed how she kept to herself because of it.Inglis stood at Link's side, leaning slightly against his halberd, the weapon no longer needed. Once Rhoamet had gotten used to them, it seemed to pose no threat whatsoever.He wasn't designed to attack people, Link had written in his notebook. Just monsters.Link squinted up at the parapets, expecting to see the looming gaze of his Gerudo captor. He saw nothing and no one."No Cinna today?" he asked Inglis. Inglis' face was drawn, his lips pressed thin, wide jaw clenched."I can't say," he said. Link sighed and turned his attention back to Rhoamet, but inside he was smiling. Something's happening.The Guardian was waiting, sitting before them with its legs huddled close to its body, single beady eye watching passively. It caught him looking and stood, ready to begin.Link thumbed through his notebook until he arrived at the page he needed, and the questions he had been asking himself for a few days now.Looking up at Rhoamet, he said, "When were you built?" and he focused as the Guardian answered.Before, it said.Link furrowed his brows, scribbling in his notebook. "Before?"
Today.
"Before… today?"
Yes.
"You think it has a sense of time?" Aurelia called from where she sat. "They say dogs don't, but cats do. It's why they're so mean.""Are you a cat person then, Aurelia?" Inglis shot back. She scoffed and muttered, I might be.Link ignored them. "Do you remember the Calamity?" he asked the Guardian. "The burning fields? The Beast in the Castle?"Rhoamet began to blink; three letters that it had often been using in recent days as Link's questions became more complex. I. D. U.
I don't understand.
"Do you remember anything?" Link pressed. "What you were for?"
I don't understand.
"Give it a rest," Aurelia sighed. She stood, and walked to Link's side. "Why would he remember anything? He's a laser with legs."Link sighed. A dead end. In the sparse visits he had been able to make to Robbie, the Sheikah had explained that in all his research, he had never been able to figure out how the Guardians were used in combat. Only that they came in different shapes and sizes, and that certain Guardians had delineated functions. The rest of his knowledge? Conjecture. Theories. Based on ancient husks and the frantic observations of hostile Guardians. Link looked up to the roof of the Gatehouse, to the boards that had been haphazardly nailed to the windows to keep Rhoamet contained; light was streaming through the cracks. He could not go to Robbie now.He tucked his notebook into his hooded vest and took a deep breath. There was no easy way to ask."Rhoamet, I need to find a way to remove your head cap. See what's going on with this beam."The Guardian did not move. Its body radiated a cool blue, and it sat down.▬ ▬ ▬, ▬●▬ ; Okay"Do you know how?"
No.
Do you trust me, Rhoamet? Link wanted to ask but knew that likely the automaton wouldn't understand. Trust was elusive. Trust was a drop of water running free. It was only there in the moment. And maybe Aurelia was right. Without a sense of time, without memory, how could it trust anything?"Hold still," Link instructed, and he stepped forward towards the Guardian. He climbed up onto its shell, using the ornamental swirls for grip. The automaton reeled backwards, its mechanical head jolting towards him, its shell flashing from blue to orange and finally to pink."Woah, woah, woah!" Inglis cried out, his shouts echoed by an equally concerned Aurelia. "What are you doing!?""Fixing him," Link called back. Both of his guards had their halberds pointed forwards, stepping across the dirt floor as Rhoamet scrambled backwards. Link held tight, gripping one of the three ear-like handles to pull himself up.Situating himself on top of the head cap, he knelt down and patted the side of the automaton's head."It's okay, it's just me," he said as he fought to maintain his footing. Rhoamet's head spun around from side to side, and he walked in backwards circles, trying helplessly and pointless to evade Link. But eventually, as Inglis and Aurelia waited with their halberds ready, the Guardian calmed. Link patted the side of his head again, all good."Is he saying anything?" he called down to the two Hylian guards."No, at least I don't think so," Aurelia called back. "He's gone blue. I think you're all good."Link nodded, satisfied that it was safe to begin. "Tell me if he starts talking."Careful not to move too quickly, he wrapped his hands around one of the ear-like handles atop Rhoamet's head cap, testing its weight and feeling for any movement. It was as big as him, the curved hook on the back of the handle rising almost a foot out from the domed head. He felt a rattle - a shift - something moving under the force of his hands, and he began to push the component out and away from the cap, leaning all of his body weight into the effort. His boots scraped against the ancient stone beneath him as he heaved against the enormous handle until with a shuddering click, it unlatched from the head cap. Rotating on a hidden hinge, the handle rolled away from Link and thudded against the side of the domed head. Link hung down over the edge of the head cap, peering down at the Rhoamet's cyclops eye."You okay?"Yes, the Guardian answered.Time to do the others then, Link affirmed, and one by one, he unlatched the other two handles until all three hung down the side of the headcap."Okay, we don't know what's under here," Link muttered down to Rhoamet. "Can you power yourself down, buddy?" He climbed around to the Guardian's front to see the response.Yes."Simple enough," Link chuckled, and watched as Rhoamet's lights went faint. He motioned to Inglis and Aurelia, who were watching with gaping mouths and angled halberds. "C'mon," he told them. "This thing will be heavy."The head cap was immense, taller than all three of them. But it was surprisingly easy to lift, the ancient material deceptively light. With a coordinated heave, they raised the head cap up and over Rhoamet's internal structure, gingerly - and awkwardly - lowering it to the ground.And within, gleaming in the faint light that trickled in through the boarded windows, at the centre of a clockwork of gears, springs, and shafts - was a diamond.Gargantuan, and shining, and shattered into half a dozen pieces.***They travelled at night, preferring flight over footsteps through the snow. It had taken two days for Teba to regain enough strength to fly, and when he finally announced he was ready to have his retribution, he surprised Zelda by offering to fly them both to the Eastern bokoblin camp."I thought the Rito were too proud to be made mounts?" Zelda teased, though she was secretly happy not to have to climb up the ravine."It isn't our fault the rest of Hyrule wasn't smart enough to grow wings," Teba grumbled.Shielded by the blanketed dark, and the ever fall of the snows, Zelda and Teba staked out the Rito camp. The skull-shaped bokoblin cave was glowing under a faint campfire, and silhouetted against the light Zelda could see the jagged points of the sharpened-trunk fence that encircled the camp. From her survey with the Sheikah scope, she found that the Rito party now consisted of Yahn, Rylen, Orli, the remaining Hylian bandit, and the slim, grey-feathered Rito who had kidnapped Tulin. Two against five. Uncomfortable odds."Any ideas?" she asked Teba. He hummed, deep in thought, his wings crossed at his chest. Uncomfortable odds indeed, if he was stumped.Zelda took stock, trying to put herself in a strategist's shoes. Assessing the situation, weighing their options; an emulation of a knight she had once known. Teba's wounds had begun to heal, scabs forming and dead feathers shedding. But he was still injured. And Zelda could fight. She flexed her right hand, calling forth the Royal Symbol, focusing on the weight of the bow at her back. She had fought, many times now. But she was no hero."We take no chances," Teba said finally. Zelda recognised the look on his face. All Knights looked the same. "They have my son.""Of course.""We need to be quick," Teba went on. "So quick they don't see us coming. Create a distraction. Grab Tulin. Get the hell out."She spoke quietly, now aware of the sensitivity of the question. "And what about Yahn?""What about him?""What are you going to do when you see him?"Teba shrugged and reached up to his injured shoulder to adjust his bandages. "Depends," he said calmly. "Could do nothing. Could kill him."Zelda looked up at him in muted shock."He has my son. Nothing else matters. I would burn that camp to the ground to save him." Teba's eyes narrowed, appraising the camp with a simmering rage. "And maybe I will."Zelda looked at the line of sharpened trunks and felt her anger stew within her. The Rito were no longer just Cingelgen's bandits. They were usurpers, willing to attack innocents, even children, based on nothing more than the flimsy promises of a con man.She unhooked the Sheikah Slate from her belt, an idea forming in her head. "I can help with that."Teba and Zelda advanced on the camp in bursts, bolting from tree to tree, closing the distance with nothing but the stars as their witness. Finally, they could go no further, the trees ending at a patch of bare land surrounding the camp.Trust Link to keep more fire arrows in his inventory than regular ones, Zelda thought as she pulled a trio of magic-enhanced arrows from the Sheikah Slate, their angular tips radiating a soft crimson. Teba watched her from behind a nearby tree as she unshouldered her white-gold bow."Remember, Sparrow," Teba whispered harshly. "Nothing teaches aim like the fear of missing.""I'm not going to miss," she shot back."That's Revali talking. Ignore him."Zelda took a deep breath. She hummed the song as she focused, nocked the arrow, and loosed it at the camp bounds. It landed in between a pair of sharpened trunks, and so she drew the second, loosing it towards the other side of the camp, and finally the third, towards the section of the camp bounds directly in front of their hiding spot in the trees.Within moments the encirclement of tree trunks was afire, three bursting flames illuminating the dark camp and sending billows of black smoke out into the night air.Shouts erupted from with the camp; Zelda knew that it was their cue. Leaping out from behind the trees, Teba and Zelda met halfway to take flight together, ascending high above the camp.Beneath them, the bandits were scrambling to the flames, frantically throwing snow against the tree trunks. Wasting no time, Teba and Zelda landed atop the skull-shaped cave and went completely unnoticed in the chaos."Take no chances!" Teba shouted to her, and they descended into the cave through the eyehole windows that had been carved into its side.She landed hard, the suddenness of the ground beneath her feet sending a shockwave of pain arching up her legs. But she kept to their plan – and this time it was a plan they had prepared together – and raising her right hand towards the cave entrance, she held a golden barrier across its mouth."Surprise, asshole," Teba growled, and Zelda turned to see him advancing on Yahn, who was crouched by a small fire in the cave. Behind him, huddled up against the wall with his wings bound was an elated Tulin, and Zelda noted with an overwhelming sense of relief that he was not harmed.Yahn vaulted backwards, wrapping his uninjured wing around Tulin's throat. In his other, which was bandaged with mottled-looking rags, he held a thin knife to the fledgeling's throat. Teba froze. Zelda had to remind herself to breathe, and in the tense silence, she noticed the ubiquitous blue and white piece of fabric that she had seen too many times now, tied around Yahn's injured wing."I just want my son," Teba raised his wings to his head."Oh, I know. But I want something else of yours." He nodded to Zelda. "His life for hers.""Teba..." Zelda cautioned. The other bandits of the camp were desperately trying to push through Zelda's barrier. She felt each blow they brought down across it, but held firm."Do they know?" Teba asked, motioning towards the Rito beyond the cave. "Rylen? Orli? They're just normal kids. Do they know that your purpose here is?""They’re helping me. They’re helping all of the Rito!""They’re helping a usurper, a murdurer. The Rito they’re sending to Hyrule Castle – they don’t come home. Do they know that?”Yahn bristled, and wrapped his wing tighter around Tulin's neck. "They know only what they need to; that when we are done, I will lead them instead of Elder Kaneli! For once the Rito will have purpose, in service of a great King!”“Was this Yinli’s idea? To finally get you to do something with your life?”"Yinli–?” Yahn flinched as if slapped, and with horror Zelda began to realise where she knew that name. “Neither of you knows? I was told you'd been to the Castle. You kill my father and come here acting coy?""I have no idea what you're talking about," Zelda insisted.Teba gave a start. "Yinli's dead?""Killed by this one, so I was told!" Yahn pointed an accusing finger towards Zelda. "But I won't say who by. Though I don't know why she kept you in the dark. She wanted so desperately to believe what she was doing was right, I suppose."Teba bowed his head. Saki. It was clear who Yahn spoke of. The Warrior looked up at his former apprentice, and in a small, resigned voice he said, "Just let me take my son, Yahn.""No!" Yahn roared. "I was sent back to this horrible place, wasting my days away in that stupid Beast and now the damn thing might kill me! After you failed to do so all those years ago! I will take that girl!"The Beast? Zelda looked at Yahn's injured wing. Had he been injured inside Vah Medoh? Could he be hurt… the same way Sidon had been?"You've been working on Vah Medoh," she said slowly. "All this time.""You think we camp out here for fun?" Yahn hissed. “I was ordered to get that damned thing working, and now you show up to make that much more unpleasant!”"Teba, just go," Zelda said. "I can hold them off. Take your son and go.""No." Teba snapped. He looked back to Yahn. "You'll take nothing more from me."Yahn growled and suddenly tossed the knife towards Zelda. She ducked, yelping as she dropped to the ground, and in an instant, her barrier fell. The bandits burst into the cave. In front of her, Teba bolted forward towards Tulin. And above it all, Zelda heard Yahn shout, "Kill her!"Not a moment later, she felt the world flip. There was a clawing sensation across her legs, and the night air rushed past her ears as her hair fell across her face. The rush of blood to her head sent a blinding flash of red across her vision, and when she regained her focus, the cave was dwindling beneath her; above the grey feather had his talons wrapped tight around her legs and was carrying her higher and higher into the air.Zelda looked down and stifled her scream with a gloved hand. The Rito's plan dawned on her; a cruel death, for one not smart enough to grow wings.But she did not need them. Not since the fall from Hebra plunge. Zelda reached for her bow, but when she padded her quiver, she found it empty, the arrows having spilt out during the ascent. She looked at her right hand; the Royal Crest still shone. Perhaps now, she had no need for arrows either.Because Link's crossbow - despite its novelty - was an otherwise ordinary weapon. And her Sparrow bow was the same. The power was in the wielder, not the weapon.Zelda aimed the bow at the Rito above her, her head spinning as the ground drew further and further away. Below, she caught a glimpse of a duo in green and blue; Rylen, and Orli, seemingly fleeing the camp. Re-centering on the Rito above, she pulled back the string, focusing her power into her hand, and humming the song that she had been taught. In a flash of light, a golden arrow materialised in her hand."Do that and you'll die anyway," the grey feather bellowed down at her. He had a neckerchief about his neck, Zelda noticed then. One of Cinelgen's."Then I'll be taking you with me," and she loosed the light-arrow into his chest. There was an explosion of light and static, and the look on the grey feather's face seemed to be one of both shock and offence, but Zelda had no time to ponder. The ground was racing up to meet her, the blazing circle of sharpened trunks growing in size with each moment. Zelda braced, held out her right hand, and raised an enclosing barrier around herself.She landed with speed, tumbling across the ground, the dirt and snow in her eyes and hair and mouth. But she was unharmed, while the grey feather lay in a heap at her side. She looked the towards the cave where Yahn, and Teba, and most importantly Tulin remained, only to see Teba thrown back from the entrance with force."Even half-dead, I'm stronger than you," Yahn bellowed as he advanced on Teba. He held his former teacher's Falcon bow, and spun an arrow between his wingtips. "I always was. And you never let that go!"The remaining Hylian bandit was slumped inner wall of the cave, Zelda noticed, Yahn's knife embedded firmly in his chest. Teba's doing, she thought as she bolted forward."Uh-uh!" Yahn shouted, quickly aiming an arrow at Teba. "No further!"Zelda could not move. She would not be able to raise her hand in time to protect him."You think that's why you were failing, Yahn!?" Teba said, propping himself up. "Is that what Cinelgen told you? That I forced you to leave!""What do you care?" Yahn sneered. He advanced, but before he took more than a step, Tulin leapt onto his shoulders, digging his wingtips into the Rito's eyes. Teba rolled, dodging Yahn's sloppily fired arrow, and pulled himself to his feet, jolting forward to punch the Rito bandit in the stomach. He gasped in shock and lurched backwards, Teba's falcon bow flying from his grip while Tulin sprang free, landing deftly in the snow.Yahn took one last look at Zelda, who had drawn her own bow in his direction, and with a scowl, he took flight to flee northwards.Teba forgot his vendetta against Yahn then; forgot about the Rito entirely. He fell to his knees and wrapped Tulin in his wings.Once it was over, Zelda took a moment to assess. Two dead bandits; the grey feather, and the Hylian. Three had fled. And all around her, the camp burned. Her eyes were hazy from the smoke.Teba was weeping, holding Tulin close, and Zelda saw that the young Rito was crying too."I'm sorry, Father," he said. "I should have gone home. I didn't want you to fight.""It's okay, neither did I," Teba said, wrapping his wings tighter around his son. "But you! That was quick thinking, thank you, Tulin. You saved us.”Zelda went to her knees beside them and gently placed a hand on Tulin's shoulder."See?" she said gently. "You were brave."Tulin just nodded, and tucked his head in close to his father's chest.Zelda tried to savour the moment, but she could not shake Yahn's admission from her mind. Cinelgen wanted control of Vah Medoh, just as he had tried to seize Vah Ruta.Exhaustion overcame her, and she slumped to the snowed ground, her hand going instinctively to the Sheikah Slate."Teba," she said softly. "It's time we went home. To Lake Totori."The Rito warrior raised his head, his eyes glistening with tears. "Of course."With a sigh, Zelda added, "We have much work left to do."***The component that housed the crystal half as large as Link, and so cumbersome to carry that Link and Inglis had to take an end each. Aurelia explained that she would have offered to help, but that she didn't want to risk damaging the delicate piece of ancient machinery."More like you can't be bothered," Inglis goaded, but the blonde-haired Hylian just rolled her eyes, and disappeared back to the barracks without a word.The weight and size of it meant that they had to take a new route back to Link's bedchamber, but Link decided then that there was a better place to bring it."Where is Cinna now?" he asked Inglis as they shuffled along the path towards the Castle."Throne room," Inglis answered through strained breath. He stopped, and lowered his end of the component to the ground, raising a hand to signal for a break."Supplicants," he explained as he regained his strength. "All that. It bores him."Link rolled his shoulders, and shook his hands to ease the soreness from their effort. "Then let's cheer him," he said, wrapping his hands around the component once more. Inglis' concern palpable, but he nodded, and for the first time since they had met, he let Link lead.Cinelgen's throne room was, as usual, unimproved in appearance. But his numbers had grown - it seemed that more and more Yiga were recalled to the Castle by the day. Was he paranoid, or just savvy enough to bring in more guards?He and Inglis waited towards the edge of the room, and scanning the faces, Link recognised some that he had tussled with in the past. A prison guard that had kept watch over him during his internment; one of Cinelgen's personal guards, a long-faced Gerudo woman named Leena; the freckled-finned Zora that he and Zelda had encountered in the Hyrule Castle Library; and the young boy who they had captured in the same fight. The little Hylian met Link's eyes and scowled, and vaguely, Link recalled fighting the drunkard woman who had accompanied the boy. From the searing hate in the boy's eyes, Link suddenly realised; was she your mother? The thought nibbled at him, at the edge of his consciousness, between his sense of duty to protect, and his detest for Cinna's people.He asked himself then; Were we wrong?Cinelgen sat limply against the velvet throne, with Milagre at his side. She had forgone her usual navy Yiga suit, and now wore a white tunic with blue trimming, and pair of soft green pants. Framed by the sun that streamed into the throne room, there was no questioning it; she was almost regal. Like a Queen. And not just any, but Cinna's Queen. Link looked at Inglis, who was gazing up at her with an almost stunned reverence, and he felt a pang of pity for the young Hylian. The question came back to him, this time echoing with sorrow; What if they're not as complex as they seem?A group of four Yiga stood before the balcony; they were not in their normal garb, but they still carried their painted Yiga masks and their curved sickles on their belts. The one to the far left spoke, a stout man with jet black hair and a scarred face."You must understand our concern, Chief," he said. "So many sudden changes. A change in leadership. A change in regime. And then…"Cinelgen leant forward in his chair, his messy red hair falling across his face, casting it in shadow. "And then…?" he repeated.The Yiga fidgeted. Beneath their feet, the wooden planks that covered the breach in the floor were stained with ageing blood. "It’s just that," one of the other Yiga said, this one a tall and wiry woman. "You haven't… you haven't told us anything! And you expect us to follow!""I tell you what you need to know," Cinelgen said firmly. "That you are not important enough to be kept in the loop does not mean we do not have plans!"A third Yiga spoke, this one broad shouldered man that towered over the others. "Us? Not important! We are your regime!"There was a shift in the court attendees, and Link saw Aurelia with her golden hair step into the room, a sly smile on her face."You belong to a dead order!" Cinelgen bellowed. "I rescued you from your idiot Elders, and you question me like this!""You killed them!" shouted the female Yiga, and the room bristled with whispers. Link watched, and waited, wondering who would move first. But it was Milagre who stepped forward."Brothers, sisters," she addressed them calmly, her hands raised. "Such harsh words do us no good."The female Yiga drew back, bowing her head. Milagre continued, "Patience is a virtue in which we Yiga are well versed. And already reports are positive. The Gerudo and Zora are locked in conflict. We just need to wait for the right moment, and then we can make our move.""But how will you know, Lady Secretary?" the first Yiga asked. Milagre smiled, sweeter and more sincere than Link had ever seen from her."I trust our Chief," she said, motioning to Cinelgen. "And I trust his judgement."The four Yiga whispered amongst themselves until finally, the first Yiga spoke. "Very well, and our apologies," he said, and on cue, the four bowed.Cinelgen just grinned, leaning back in his chair as though the victory were his own, and Link suddenly understood. Milagre might stand at his side. She might be silent at dinner. She might be a shadow against the brightness that danced with him, but she controlled Cinelgen's army, and from that Link saw; she controlled him. What do they owe each other? He asked himself again and now knew that he had more of the answer."Ah, Link, Inglis!" came Cinelgen's booming voice from above. "Well now, what do we have here?""A development," Link answered, and the Throne Room was beset by another wave of whispers.Cinelgen stood, a hungry grin on his face. "To my study," he ordered. "I've had enough of this court."Link and Inglis placed the housing component down in front of Cinelgen's desk. The Gerudo had taken up office in Rhoam's old office, he noted with some resentment."It used to house a diamond, but at some point, the diamond faltered," Link explained as Cinelgen inspected the cylindrical component. "Guardians aren't meant to be active for as long as he was. It deteriorated. Broke. We can fit him with a new one.""I'll send this to my suppliers," Cinelgen said, leaning down to get a closer look.Link swallowed, focusing on calming his nerves. "No," he said calmly. "The gem would need to be specially cut for the component. I would… I would prefer to be there."Cinelgen looked up at him, brows furrowed. "Be where?"Inglis and Milagre were waiting by the door. He shot them a cursory glance, and cleared his throat. The Zora had apparently closed entrance to their city, and the Gerudo were cut off by the siege on their bridge. There was only one option. "Death Mountain.""No.""Listen-""No, you listen." Cinelgen stood, raising a pacifying hand to Link. "You have been good to us, but I cannot take that risk."Link was determined not to lose his focus. The plan had been thought up quickly, with no time to vet, but also no time to doubt. He stood up straighter. "The diamond can't just be a diamond. It has to focus power."Cinelgen walked back to the desk, leaning against the time-worn wood with his arms at his chest. "I will bring the Gorons here."Link shook his head, aware of Cinelgen's growing annoyance. "They won't come. You have no Goron allies. But I do."He thought of Yunobo, the young Goron he had met what must have been nearly a year ago now. Was it right? To bring him into this?Was it right to give Rhoamet back his power? Link thought of the Guardian in the Gatehouse, and tried to believe he wasn’t putting more people in danger with this gambit. But if he was right, if he had infiltrated Cinelgen’s good graces just enough – then it would be enough.Cinelgen had been tapping the desk, drumming his fingers. And then, his face brightening, he slapped it. "Alright, sure!" he beamed. "I'm bored here anyway. We'll take Inglis and Aurelia, and my guards." Cinelgen stepped forward to place his hands on Link's shoulders. "Ah! I'm excited now! A journey to Eldin! I haven't been there in years!"Link breathed a deep sigh of relief, and smiled weakly when Cinelgen clapped him on the back. But he could not deny, despite the fear at travelling with his captor, the bead of excitement that he felt. The mountain is not the destination he would have chosen - Link would have preferred to go west - but the mountain was one essential thing.The mountain was out there, beyond the Castle. And out there was where she was.He smiled as he remembered the words, spoken on an afternoon that shimmered with warmth, and purpose, and regret: out there is where we should be.
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
The voice behind her was closing in; calling her back, calling for her to stop. Slow down, my Lady, it said, it isn't safe.She pressed further into the raging storm, so hard and fast that the blinding dust and sand scratched at her skin, leaving her raw against the fury of the desert. But she was not fleeing. She never would, no matter what her advisers said. This was her duty, she told herself. She would not flinch. Not her. Not this Chief.The towering dust storm had closed in a few miles to the north, and so Riju had no choice but to rely on her instincts -- and her beloved sand seal Patricia -- to guide her through the desert. Still there was little chance they could become lost; even a vast, empty space could become known. And Riju knew this desert. Any minute, any second now, and Vah Naboris would emerge. Feeling the bitter taste dust on her tongue, she called for Patricia to move faster."My Lady, please!" The broad form of Buliara was ploughing through the sand towards her, pulled by her own spotted sand seal. The bodyguard's hands were wrapped tight around the seal's tether, the long rope wobbling under the speed. "It is too dangerous!""We much press on!" Riju shouted over her shoulder. "We need to find Naboris!""It's no use!" Buliara was struggling to keep her balance. She motioned for Riju to pull back, and almost fell.Defiant, Riju pushed Patricia harder, giving her sand seal's tether a hard yank, almost losing her footing as they flew forward over a sloping dune. Buliara may have been a strong surfer, but Riju was lighter and faster, and Patricia was bred for speed. Try as she might, and shout all she wanted, the guard simply could not keep up.Riju tore blindly forward and Buliara was swallowed up by the storm. "Sorry," she whispered to her bodyguard. "This I must do."A few weeks past, a retinue of Zora had arrived at the newly constructed Geldarm Bridge, built to allow easier passage from Central Hyrule into the Gerudo Desert. Riju remembered when she had issued the decree and the pride she had felt at seeing the bridge completed. It could have allowed safer travel, easier trade, better alliances with the rest of Hyrule…It could have been so many things, but then these Zora had laid siege, and refused to leave until Riju admitted to trying to kill their King. It was one of us, but it was not me! She had told them, cursing the name Cinelgen, and the endless trouble male Gerudo seemed to bring her people.Relentless the storm raged, and deep the dust would bite; but neither Riju nor Patricia slowed down. The Gerudo Chief yanked her tether again, feeling the rough hewn rope against her fingertips, moving whip-like between her across her skin, breaking blisters into callouses. She felt the desert sun draping her in a blanket of warm, so strong that it pierced even the densest dust of the storm. A bead of sweat ran down her brow, and she soon tasted it on her lips. Riju would have smiled; this was home. Her home. And no matter how many times she was fearful, or doubted herself, she needed only look out to the infinite horizon, and see the shimmer of the sun-baked air, and she knew that she loved this place with a ferocity that meant she would do anything to protect it.But as much as she wanted to, Riju could not fight, and could not flee. The Zora outnumbered her guard three to one, and had almost cut Gerudo off completely from the rest of Hyrule; the only other way out of the desert was an arduous hike through the Gerudo Highlands. Riju had been told simply to sit and wait. They will tire, and leave, her advisors had said. We have all we need here. Our people can survive without trade.With each passing day, the Zora pressed further across the Geldarm, threatening violence at every step. And then the news arrived of the melee at the Gatepost Town Ruins; half a dozen Gerudo injured, an entire party of Zora left beaten and bloody, and, to their shared shame, the handful of Hylians who had tried to stand between them were so badly hurt that they did not recover...She would do anything to remedy the tragedy. Anything to prevent it happening again. Anything; even attempting to tame an ancient colossus.Finally, faintly, rising out of the sands she spied four great columns, segmented and shaded in an ethereal amethyst hue. They were bent forward, the segments twisted across each other to allow the Beast to kneel, and as Riju and Patricia approached, the rest of the Divine Beast Vah Naboris materialised from the storm.They rounded to the front of the Beast, coming to a halt beside where its legs met the ground, and to where the Naboris' enormous form shielded her from the winds."Vah Naboris!" Riju shouted up at the Beast. "My name is Chief Riju of the Gerudo. I come seeking your aid!"The Beast's wide head tilted downwards, its six shining, expressionless blue eyes centring on Riju. For a long, unsettling moment it stared, unmoving, and Riju wondered if it was beseeching her to speak."An army has come to attack my home," she tried to explain. "And the Champion, and the Princess - the ones who helped you - I cannot find them!"The Beast shifted, and with a resonant groan, it tilted its head forwards once again, the bony segments of its long neck creaking as they slid across one another. It gazed blankly forward, and the lights from its ancient markings pulsed with a dim radiance."Naboris!" Riju cried. "Please!" But still nothing. The Beast ignored her.Desperate, Riju brought Patricia around to an archway carved into the Beast's side; the entrance where she had seen the Champion Link go to tame Naboris himself. But it was closed now, a wall of stone where the door had once been. Naboris remained still, not noticing or perhaps not even caring, as Riju attempted in vain to push the doorway open.This is the only way, she thought as she pounded her fists against the ancient stone. I thought you were meant to help us! The door was unyielding. Why? Why is this happening to us?Buliara found her weeping by the stone door. She had fallen to her knees and buried her face in her hands. Her long braid had unravelled in the winds of the storm and now hung in a heap about her face. When she looked up, she expected to see her bodyguard's usual stern expression, but instead, she saw a gentle, rueful smile."There is no use, my Lady," Buliaria said as she wrapped an arm around Riju's shoulders. "The only ones who can pilot her are the Champion and the Princess, and we know that something must have happened to them." Her smile faded then."What else are we going to do?" Riju asked, beginning to wipe away her tears. "It is only a matter of time before the Zora storm that bridge.""I do not know." Buliara frowned. "But we will need to protect our people without Naboris, and without the Champion and the Princess." She stood, and held a hand out to Riju, adding, "I believe together, we will find a way."Riju allowed Buliara to lead her away from Vah Naboris, back to their sand seals, and back towards Gerudo Town. Once again, the Beast returned to the storm, and soon their home was cresting over the horizon - that tiny fortress of sandstone, and the people, her people, who lay vulnerable within.Not together, but alone, she thought. We will find a way alone.Cinelgen tied the binds a little tighter around Link's wrists, securing them firmly to Inglis' saddle. "Needs must," he apologised. "As much as we trust you."But you don't, Link thought, though he did not say it. If they actually trusted him, they would let him ride free, and not bound by the wrists to another man's horse. Trust was elusive, Link now firmly believed. Trust only existed in the moment.The party rode out before dawn on a morning so cold that Link had not been able to feel his feet as they walked him to the Castle Stables. They were in the depths of Winter now, the sun creeping across the sky in a low arc, and the darkness closing in on each side of the waking hours. Dawn rose slowly. Night fell quickly. Hyrule was blanketed in a pervasive, lingering sense of twilight. Milagre had been left to manage the operations at the Castle, a task she scowled at. But she had bowed to Cinna all the same as they passed by her at the Castle gates, sending them off with a sardinic, Don't screw this up.Cinelgen rode a narrow-shouldered horse with soft, singularly sand-coloured hair and a white mane. His saddle was plain; rough dark leather and no ornaments save a few brass buckles for attaching saddle bags. As always, he wore his sturdy, too-short trousers, and his worn leather jacket under a rich red velvet cloak. He doesn't look like a King, Link often thought. He doesn't even look Gerudo, or Hylian, or anything. It seemed that his clothes betrayed his philosophy; a medley of ideas and approaches, all underlined by simplicity and practicality. He didn't dress like a king, because at present he was, in truth, just a wanderer.The Gerudo would lead, while Inglis and Link followed, sharing a saddle. Aurelia rode beside them, and two of Cinelgen's guards Marlo and Teel steered a waggon containing the housing component for Rhoamet's diamond. It had been draped under a large cotton tarp, hidden from view. If asked, they would call it mining equipment, though Link knew they would not be asked. The roads were empty, the travellers having stolen back to their homes or the warm confines of the Stables, as talk of the civil war and the conflict at the Geldarm Bridge had begun to spread across the Kingdom, conveyed to Link in wisps of overheard conversations and whispers in the hallways. I wonder if you've heard, he thought. I wonder if you're there, dealing with it all alone?He felt a strange sense of loss as the silhouette of the Castle receded behind them. It was a prison, but it had once been a home. Now the vastness of Hyrule was before them, and he gazed across it with a wonder tainted by grief. So much beauty in the cloak of white snow that covered the land, but so much conflict hidden underneath. He grasped at rediscovered sensations; the wind in his face, the rhythm of the horse's canter beneath him, the yelps of a fox as it tore across their path. Bound to the saddle, there was little to do but feel. If he closed his eyes, he was free.The party mostly travelled in silence. Aurelia chatted idly, remarking on the weather, and the winter flowers, the way the season changed Hyrule underneath their feet as well as above. She spoke of flowers that stored starch in warmer months to survive when the sun disappeared, and of the way winter shrooms could be used to brew elixirs that could nullify even the heat of the desert."How d’you know so much about flowers?” Inglis asked, and Aurelia laughed."Well, in case you haven’t noticed, my sister and I are cooks.”“I hadn’t.”“Why then would we be serving dinner each night, huh? Really, Inglis.”“The food’s good,” Link couldn’t help but say, and he meant it. Simple stews they might be, and usually not quite enough, but they were warm and rich and well seasoned with Hyrule Herb. Aurelia gave him a sly smile, which Link could not help but return. "My younger sister Hana is better with food. My other sister Cassiah taught me a different kind of brew.""And useful too," Cinelgen added. "Many a time my people have been saved by her healing elixirs.""Sounds like witchcraft to me," Inglis grumbled."Afraid she'll put a hex on you?" Cinna teased, and Link could practically feel Inglis rolling his eyes."It's not magic to know how to cook."But Link felt himself filing away the information anyway. He’d never seen or heard of a Cassiah at Hyrule Castle, though he had seen Hana at dinner a few dozen times now, and he wondered what had happened to the third sister.After a few days of travel through the frozen landscape, the Akkalan had begun to fall ill. Inglis sniffled in Link's ear, and coughed half the day. Eventually, he began to slump, his eyes milky and his skin paled."Hey, Aurelia," Link called to the Yiga woman once the party had stopped to make camp in the Crenal Hills. They had left him propped up against a tree while they built their lean-tos and made a fire. "Have you got any Hyrule Herb?"Aurelia's soft face brightened. "Are you learned in the healing arts as well?""No," Link said, thinking of Mipha's power, and Zelda's penchant for elixirs, and the Hyrule Herb tea she and him had shared when they had fallen ill in Akkala. "I've just had friends who were. I guess I prefer to cook.""Ah, you'll have to cook for us, Champion," Cinelgen suggested. He and Marlo were knelt over the fire, coaxing it to life.Link raised his hands, still bound together. "Might be difficult like this,” he said, and the camp rumbled with laughter. So far, the others would only untie his binds in the evening, during supper, and would watch with casually cautious expressions to see if he tried to escape. They saw nothing suspicious as of yet.Cinelgen halted his work, and pulled his dagger from his belt, moving to kneel by Link's side.In three clean hacks, he cut the binds. "Cook for us then, I'm sure you can forage something nearby," Cinelgen said, eyes wild, the words more an order than an invitation. And then, a little threatening - "But don't get too ambitious. It's rough weather these days."Link massaged the skin where the ropes had cut in, finding it chaffed and sore. "Come with me," Link said, the words a challenge. "Like you said, rough weather."Cinna grinned, and gave a low nod. For the rest of the daylight hours, he and Link scoured the rocky hills for vegetables and game, Cinna's painted Duplex Bow quickly taking down a pair of slender-necked herons. Link thought a few times how easy it might be to flee, or even try to overpower Cinelgen, but decided against it. He was hungry, and didn’t particularly want to die. It would have to wait.That night he made a simmering stew of bird meat and mushrooms, seasoning the broth with some rock salt and chestnuts that he had found on the hills, and the whole party had their fill. Even Inglis, still grumpy and battling his cold, managed to smile a few times at Cinna's ridiculous stories or Aurelia's snide remarks."Cheer up, Inglis," Cinna goaded. He turned to Link. "I saved this boy's life, and yet he's so dour all the time!""Yeah, yeah," Inglis huffed. "Maybe I've just heard all your stories."Link had to bite down his surprise, or maybe lack thereof, hiding it under a passively amused smile.What do they owe each other? He asked himself for a final time. In Inglis’ case, the answer was everything.A hand on his shoulder pulled him from his musings, and he jolted at the touch."Hey! It's only me, Hero!" Aurelia laughed, sitting down next to him. "This is good!" She nodded to an empty bowl of stew on her lap, and thumbed the fabric of his sleeve. "If you were trying to impress us, you certainly have." Then she had a hand to his face, fingers casually weaving through one of his bangs and pushing them behind an ear."Oh, I— Sorry I—" Link's mouth was lead. He could not speak and awkwardly sprang to his feet to refill his empty bowl. Behind him, Aurelia just laughed.The party talked until the fire burnt low, and the skies sparkled with starlight. Allowed to lie with his hands unbound for the first night since their departure, Link slept deeply. In his dreams he saw the Castle, radiant and clean, a figure in gold at its peak. He climbed the spire to reach her, and when he did, she smiled. It's only me, she said, and when she reached out her hand to touch his face, Link awoke.He was aching from the cold, blinded by the crispness of the dream, and slowly, making him wonder if he had woken at all, he became aware of the soft sensation of warm fingers against his cheek. She faded into focus. A girl rendered in white and gold.Her blonde hair framed her round face, worn long and loose such that it swayed as she moved. She grinned, crows feet at the corners of her eyes, the soft light from the embers of the fire painting her in an alluring hue. You've come back to me, he almost said, but when he saw that her eyes were blue as the distant ocean, he knew something was wrong."This isn't a dream," Link murmured."It can be," Aurelia answered. She leant her face in close, her lips brushing his, and Link shot backwards, scrambling away from her. Aurelia followed on all fours. She was wrapped in a velvet cloak that hung loosely around her shoulders."Something the matter?" she asked innocently. "Cinna told me you liked blondes.""I don't—" he managed as he scraped against the frozen ground, fingers stinging as he plunged them into the snow."Oh, you do," Aurelia chuckled. She caught him with a hand to his thigh, and he nearly yelped. From fright of excitement, he wasn't sure. Frantic, his head spinning, Link reached up to push her away."No," he wheezed. "I can't-"But she just giggled again, and let the cloak fall. It had been all she was wearing. Link tried, and failed, not to look."Please just go," he breathed."Aw," she whined. "Why?""I don’t want— look you’re a nice person but—“Aurelia slumped back onto the balls of her feet with a sigh, redressing. "I see," she frowned, the words falling limp and sullen from her lips. "You've nobler taste."For a moment longer, she sat slouched, unable to meet his eye, and Link wanted to reach out to her; to apologise or to make her stay or just to yield. Company of any kind, to fill the sudden longing she had stirred within him. Link felt his heart beating in his throat, fear and disgust and anticipation thrumming through him, centring on a new, absurd ache in his groin."Please go, Aury," Link said. "Get away from me."And with a huff, she went, standing to walk back to her bedroll. Her long blond hair swayed about her hips, golden even in the dim light. It was only as she faded into the night, leaving Link alone and reeling, that he realised; she reminds me of you.The merchant at the Foothill Stables was charging three times his normal rate, though he eventually got that down to only twice the usual once Cinelgen gave him his fiercest glare."You're lucky you're climbing the mountain during the high winter!" the merchant told them as Cinelgen handed over a pouch full of rupees to pay for the fireproof elixirs. "You’ll only need one of these each, and won’t need ‘em 'til you get right into the village.""How long does each vial last?" The Gerudo demanded, and the Hylian merchant shrunk further away from him, intimidated by Cinelgen's towering figure."A – a day, at least!" he stammered, though Cinna seemed unphased by the reception. He nodded in thanks, and signalled for the rest of the party to follow.Link was allowed to ride without binds now as well, though he still shared a saddle with Inglis until they reached the Maw of Death Mountain. Beyond there the horses could not handle the heat and were left behind.The group marched single file along the winding, rocky path, the volcanic rock crunching beneath their shoes. Cinelgen led as always, followed by Link, and then Inglis, Aurelia, and Marlo and Teel with the housing component now wheeled in a small waggon – one made from steel so as not to catch fire.Link was glad to have Inglis in between himself and the blonde-haired Yiga woman. Her advances several nights before had left him nauseous; from both repulsion and confusion. But fading away from her - and indeed the rest of the party - was easy. A well-worn disguise; the stoic, unfeeling Knight. He had grown so quiet that even Inglis noticed, and Link waved away the concern by saying that their travels had made him tired and that he found it easier to walk in silence.It took the rest of the day to reach Goron City itself, and the higher they climbed, the more unbearable the heat became. They sweated and panted and drained their waterskins, but Cinna refused to let anyone drink a vial of the fireproof elixir until absolutely necessary. Just as the merchant had described, Link only began to feel the tell-tale prickling sensation against his skin once the city came into view. Any further and the prickling would become burning, as his clothes caught fire, and the sweat on his skin began to boil. Cinelgen must have been feeling it too, for he distributed the vials with haste.The tepid liquid was ash grey in colour and as viscous as honey, and tasted of charcoal. Inglis nearly spat his out, and Teel choked on hers, grey spittle flecked on her chin. But they all downed the elixirs, and pressed forward into Goron City. This is where you would have sent me, Zelda, Link could not help but think. Well I made it.Night had fallen, but the city was not subdued. It was illuminated by the streams of lava that flowed leisurely underneath the walkways, bubbling and gurgling, providing heat to the city even in winter. Children rolled along the rocky platforms and walkways, one of them bumping into Inglis and nearly bowling him over. From the barbeque station to their right, the smell of burning meat wafted through the air, and above them, a group of bards belted out a rambunctious tune on a handful of brass instruments and a set of impossibly large wooden drums. The Gorons were spread out through the city, some sitting outside their houses, some chatting, some snacking on rocks and molten, and many waved at the party as they passed by. Only the elderly ones squinted at them, but even then they didn't frown. Cinelgen motioned for Link to lead, and he walked them towards Bludo's house at the city centre. Marlo and Teel waited outside with the component as the rest of the party stepped insideThe old Goron was pouring over some stone tablets with a magnifying glass, hunched over a stone desk and sitting on a stone seat. No a single trace of timber in sight – or anything organic for that matter, except perhaps the gorons themselves.The Goron boss looked up from his work, one eye closed and the other filling the end of the magnifying glass – and then he smiled."Ah - well, look at this!" he cried. "Link! How are you?"Link stood with his hands on his hips, and he tried his best to emulate the version of himself that Bludo would remember; the freer, simpler Link, who only wanted to help. "Going just fine!" he said, worrying he might have overdone it. He took a breath. "Bludo, I need a favour.""Anything, anything," Bludo said, standing from his rocky chair. "Who're your friends?""Travellers, nothing more," Cinelgen said before Link could answer."Of course, of course," Bludo said slowly, eyebrows raised. “Not a lot of travellers on the road these days.”"They’re here with me. I’ve been… keeping an eye on them. To keep them safe," Link managed, and Bludo's slightly sceptical expression softened into a warm grin.He placed a hefty hand on Link's back, and led them outside. "What is it then, Link? How can we aid you?"Link nodded to Marlo, who unveiled the component with a quick tug to the tarp that covered it. It felt as though the entire city turned to look; the Gorons gaped at the mechanical contraption with round eyes and open mouths. Even Bludo could not help but gape at what they had presented him.“Daruk’s beard. What kind of metal is that!?” he said.“Sheikah,” Link answered. "And I need a diamond specifically cut for it. Tapered too, towards the front," Link explained. For a long moment, Bludo did not seem to hear, staring in awe at the housing component. But then he blinked, and placed his hands at his back."You have rupees? Now I know, you saved Goron City, I get it. But business is business.”Link nodded, casting a quick glance to Cinelgen. "Of course," the Gerudo added.Bludo smiled again, his worries evidently gone. "Done deal then!" He cupped his hands to his mouth, and shouted, "YUNOBOOO!"Across the plaza, Link saw a wide-eyed Goron pop his head out from one of the houses, and he recognised the face as belonging to the youth who had aided him in reaching Vah Rudania. Yunobo hurriedly sprung from the house, and rolled across the plaza to meet them."Link!" he gasped after he unraveled himself, arms open. Link could not dodge in time, and felt the air escape his lungs as Yunobo pulled him into a crushing hug. "How are you, buddy?""I'm fine," Link answered breathlessly. Behind him he could hear Inglis and Aurelia snickering."Link here needs a diamond cut," Bludo pointed to the housing component. "For… that."Yunobo took a quick look at the housing, but did not linger on it. “So… you’re not here for Rudania?” He said, and began rubbing his hands together anxiously."No…I’m not," Link frowned. “Is everything okay?”"I thought you'd have seen. Rudania shut himself down a while ago now." The Goron cocked his round head to the side. "That isn't why you're here?"Link could feel Cinna's scrutinising gaze. "I… I can't help you with that, Yunobo.""But don't you have that flat rock with you, the one that does magic? I don't see it."“I don’t have it with me.”“Oh, well that’s fine. We can still go have a look, right? Hey, did you find that Princess? Kairo said he’d seen a Hylian girl in Gerudo who–”“We don’t have time for this,” Cinelgen suddenly said, placing a hand on Link’s shoulder, pulling him backwards with light but menacing touch."I really can't help, Yunobo," Link reiterated, perhaps a little too harsh. "Maybe some other time.""Oh. Oh, okay. Only if you're sure." Yunobo shrugged. He waved at the party to follow, and led them to the ore refinery.***White feathers against the white snow. The warrior all but disappeared.Teba had regained his son, but lost his family. And he mourned; the apprentice who had fooled him, the life that had evaded him, and the woman who had betrayed him.When they were not walking, rounding the mountains back towards Lake Totori, he slept. The fight with Yahn had re-opened his wounds - mental, physical, and all the rest - and had damaged his armour. As dangerous as Hebra remained to them, he could not fly Zelda back to Totori, and he seemed to trust her to protect Tulin while he rested. When she expressed concern about not being capable, he just gave her the same, repeated line - nothing teaches aim like the fear of missing - and once she had been so mad that she had almost thrown a handful of snow in his face.However, aside from keeping an eye out for wolves or a stray lizalfos, there was little Zelda needed to do to watch over Tulin. The child was as dutiful as ever; he foraged for firewood, found them food, and often sat with Zelda during her evening watches. And he doted on his father. Tulin brought Teba water, checked his bandages, and even redressed the wound on his father's shoulder."You're good at that," Zelda told the fledgeling once he was done. Teba had already fallen back asleep, and was snoozing between them, his spiny feathers rumbling as he snored.Tulin nodded, grinning up at her with a brightness dancing in his eyes that she hadn't before seen. "Mother taught me how to sew. Bandages are just fabric, plus they're stretchy.""I’m sure Rito Village would appreciate a good tailor someday," Zelda suggested, and the brightness dimmed."I don't know," Tulin shrugged, running a hand over his single braided feather. "Father is a Warrior. So I should be one too."Zelda frowned. "Is that what you want, Tulin?"The fledgeling didn't answer. Tulin interlaced his wingtips, his eyes suddenly hard and pensive - an echo of his father - and he avoided the question with his own. "Is he going to be okay? Father isn't normally this…""Glum?" Zelda chuckled. Tulin nodded, looking down at his father. "No, he isn't," she agreed. There was no need to conceal the truth."Do you think… he'll get better?"Zelda followed Tulin's line of sight, and appraised Teba with a small smile. She ran a hand through the spiny feathers on his crown, and Teba stirred slightly, mumbling, no, don't, don’t muss it up, and when he began to snore again she said, "I think your Father is an old warrior in a world that changed while he wasn't looking." Just like you, Hero. "His friends changed, his purpose changed. He wasn't ready for it, and now he's hurting."Tulin had not taken his eyes off of his father. "How can we help him?""I don't know," Zelda admitted. “At least, I think I don't.”"Maybe if I had been stronger…" Tulin sighed, leaning forward, his chin resting against his wingtips.Zelda stood, and carefully stepped around Teba to sit by Tulin's side. She held out her right hand, and removed her glove to show him the mark of the Royal Crest. "I'm sorry I hid this from you, back in Rito Village," she said. "But do you know what it is?"Tulin studied the radiant symbol. She held it closer and let him run a wingtip against her skin. "Father called it a mage's mark.""Well, he was mostly right," Zelda conceded, and it occurred to her that few living would recognise the Royal symbol. "It’s a symbol of power. I was told my whole life that I was born to wield it, and yet it never came to me. Not matter how hard I tried, or how much I told myself that it was my destiny. But you know when it did come forth?""When?""When I wanted it, Tulin. When I wanted it more than anything I'd ever wanted before." When I was ready to die for it, though she did not say that to the child.The little Rito's face was twisted. "But didn't you want it before?""Perhaps, but not for myself. My Father insisted it was my duty to find this power, and he made me keep trying. So I tried, for him, but it wasn’t enough. And I was so angry at him. He seemed not to care what I wanted," She closed her hand into a fist, and the mark burned brighter. "But now I think he was just afraid of what would happen if I failed. In a terrible way, he was trying to protect me. It made him cruel, and confused."Tulin shrugged. "Father never seems confused.""That's because adults are masters of pretending, Tulin. They're better at it than children."Tulin smiled. "No, that can't be.”Zelda nodded firmly. "It's true! They’ll believe anything,” she made a stern face. “I bet if I told your father, in a deep serious voice, that the Champion Revali swore by rushroom stew as the source of his greatness, he’d believe me!”Tulin laughed again, so loud that Teba began to stir once more. His eyes lolled open, and he gave them both a grumpy look. Ignoring him, Zelda wrapped a hand around Tulin's wing."I want you to promise me something, brave one," she said."What's that?" Tulin asked."Do what brings you joy," Zelda looked to Teba, and their eyes met. "I am certain now that if you do, your father will be happy too."Teba looked away, caught, and with a sigh he rolled over to turn away from them. Tulin did not notice. He was deep in thought, his wings crossed at his chest, and after a few moments, he leapt to his feet."I have an idea then!" he beamed. "Father's armour is damaged. One of the straps came loose in the fight. I've got needles, and thread. I can fix it."Zelda could not stop him once he was set on the task. The little Rito darted over to their packs, pulling from his a small case, and hauling Teba's damaged leather armour back to where Zelda sat. He worked so long that she had to take the needle from his wingtips and order him to bed. And in the morning, he rose well before either Zelda or Teba to complete his work, proudly presenting the fixed strap to his father as they were preparing to leave their camp."Huh," the warrior smiled. "That's actually quite impressive. Can't even see the stitching."Tulin was ecstatic, jumping from foot to foot with excitement. "Mother taught me."Teba's face fell, but he strapped on the armour without complaint, and knelt down to ruffle the fledgeling's feathers. "I owe you one, Tulin," he said softly.Zelda watched as Tulin gazed up at his father, wonder and sadness on his youthful features. The little Rito then held out a wing."Let's go," Tulin said. Teba hesitated, casting a glance backwards to Zelda, but then he smiled, and took Tulin's wing in his own. Together, they walked out into the snow.A day later they were back under the safety of the shadow of Vah Medoh.Tulin's talons clicked on the wooden planks as he sprinted towards the Flight Range Ravine, giggling through panting breaths. "I missed this!" he cried, and leapt, the updrafts carrying him high into the air. Zelda had chased after him, but could not follow, crying out for him to be careful. Behind them, Teba stalked over to the ever-burning fire, puttering around the hut to search for a spare log of firewood to stoke the flames."Leave him be, Zelda," he called out to her from the fire. "He'll be fine."Casting one last glance at the white-winged fledgeling, Zelda turned from the ravine and went to join Teba in the hut. She stopped by his trunk, and used the key he had given her to unlock the latch, breathing a sigh of relief when she found the crossbow and the Master Sword still safely tucked within.There was no use hiding it anymore. If someone found her, they would have to take it from her. She reached down to grab the Master Sword, marvelling once again at how light it felt. She tried to picture herself wielding it, wearing it on her back, carrying its burden; but she could not. And so how am I meant to continue on without you…"Why did he give it to you?" Teba asked from behind her. In the distance, Tulin's peals of laughter echoed across the range."For safe keeping, perhaps?" Zelda offered."That's not all it is, is it?" Teba sensed her thoughts, and Zelda nodded. She went to join him by the fire. Taking hold of the hilt, Zelda gingerly drew the Sword from its scabbard. Her arm tensed; the Sword was resisting again. Put me down, it seemed to be saying. Unhand me."We used this, along with my powers, to cleanse Divine Beast Vah Ruta," she began to explain. "The Beasts are still infected with Malice. And Vah Medoh… he is among the worst.""So Link… sent you here. That was when I found you.""Yes, maybe a day or so later. But Teba… this isn’t my sword," Zelda protested. "I'm not its Master, I can't wield it as he did.""You certainly look the part," Teba said. There was some truth to that - Zelda still wore Link's Champion tunic, the blue and white fabric peeking out from under her snowquill coat. She wore it because it was a strong piece of armour, she told herself. Woven with the properties of dragon scales, but inside she knew. It was a piece of him. That was all it was.Lowering the Master Sword across her lap, Zelda traced the way glow of the flames danced across the blue blade. She offered it out to Teba, and cautiously, he held it by the hilt, examining its make as Zelda spoke."In any case, cleansing Medoh is not my first priority. I seek to pilot him," She looked at the Rito warrior expectantly. He quirked a brow, and pointed a wingtip towards her, silently asking the question, You?Zelda shook her head, and Teba froze, his expression caged. Slowly, almost in disbelief, he tapped his chest. Me?"Oh, honestly, who else, Teba?" Zelda rolled her eyes at his frown. "We need to secure Medoh away from Cinelgen's people. If we can launch him, we can seal him, place him out of reach of Hylian and Rito alike. And then we can cleanse him when Link has been returned to us."The warrior did not move, only glared, until he began to shake his head. "I can't," Teba said. He handed her back the Sword."Why not?"The warrior bowed his head. "I can't go back there. Not yet.""Why? Because… because of Saki?"Teba nodded and looked up to where his son played, his eyes watery, drooping. With a long sigh, Zelda stood. She knew grief, but not this kind. Her grief was for her own failure; ten years of failure had prepared her for the fatal blow that Calamity Ganon laid her kingdom, and a hundred years later she had survived its effects.But Teba's grief had hit a blind spot, winded him, driving a hard knife into the one part of him that he had thought incorruptible; his family, his Saki. There was nothing she could say. She resheathed the Master Sword, and returned it to its safe place within the storage chest. Tulin was still happily soaring through the ravine, completely unaware of the sombre conversation playing out below him.Teba spoke with a small voice. "Did you… did you really kill Yinli?"Zelda shook her head. "I don’t know. I don’t think I’ve ever met him. What did he look like?""An old white-feather falcon, with brown as well. Stern face. Stubborn, too. He carried one of the best bows in the village, a tri-shot Falcon."Her eyes went wide as he spoke. The face was hazy, but the memory was not. Gasping, blood pumping, her feet scampering across the ageing stone floor, desperately climbing the stairs as triplets of arrows raining down around her. And above, a white-feathered Rito, plumage flecked with greys and browns, a spectacular bow in hand.The Rito bandit that she and Link had fought in Hyrule Castle Library. She remembered him. And she remembered how Link had shot him.Zelda swallowed hard. "H-he was Yahn's father?""He was more than that," Teba answered. "He was Elder Kaneli's chief advisor, and has been missing for quite a while now.""Kaneli's advisor?" She felt the blood drain from her face, and sat in a stunned silence, blinking dumbly at the fire in front of them. How? How could this happen?Teba's face was drawn, his expression seeking. "What is it?""I didn't kill him, Teba." She whispered, trembling. "But Link might have. In Hyrule Castle. Yinli was among the bandits. He wore the scarf."Teba grimaced at this information. “Yinli, Yahn, Kaneli. All of them bowing to that usurper. And for what?”"What do you mean?” Zelda said. “Kaneli is part of this too?”"Must be, if Yinli was involved," Teba breathed. “Cinelgen probably told them all the same story he told Yahn. Glory for the Rito under a new king. Pah.”They stared into the fire together, rendered mute, a terrible understanding having passed between them. Cinelgen hadn't infiltrated the Rito. He had allied them. Indeed it seemed nothing could surprise her now."It was Yahn," Teba growled, his face darkening. "It started with him. He must have convinced his father, and then Kaneli. They started taking out our couriers to cut us off, to cut all of Hyrule off," Teba shook his head, a look of rage creeping across his face. "That little bastard. It isn't enough that he turns my wife against me. He's taken my home from me too."Zelda looked past the fire to the upright body of Vah Medoh, perched on the spire of Rito Village. She remembered Teba’s illuminating pieces of political education; all diplomacy is trade. So what did the Rito trade for a seat at a king’s table?Was it Vah Medoh? She was at once terrified and determined, knowing the answer didn’t matter now."We can wait no longer, Teba," she said, placing a firm hand on his shoulder. "You will help me secure Vah Medoh. Yahn will never control the Beast, but his recklessness could damage it beyond repair."Teba squinted at her, surprised by her sudden sternness. "Yes ma'am," he said, then muttering under his breath, "Anything to keep that Yahn away from it.""Good!" Zelda said, feeling that strange wildness within her once again; the excitement, the thrill. Link's armour was doing more than making her look like him, it seemed. "We'll go as soon as the snow clears."Teba chuckled again, amused by her enthusiasm. He poked at the crackling fire, just as Tulin swooped back down into the hut, cheeks red from the cold."I don't understand,” Teba said, just as they were preparing to leave. “Why me? There are plenty of stronger flyers in the village."Zelda looked at Teba's injured wings; his damaged armour; his battle-hardened face. The scars of the only Rito who cared enough to stand up to Cinelgen's chaos - even at the risk of his own life."Perhaps there are, younger ones too," she said, ignoring Teba's unamused scowl. "But none of them are Champions." ***The diamond was to be sized and cut to… approximately what Link thought they needed. He could not tell them the truth; that he had no real idea of what would work. But he instructed the Goron miners at the refinery of his specifications, and was relieved when they began to nod."Aye, we can do that," one of the miners said. "Should take a couple days. Hope you packed enough elixirs.""Can't we just head back down the mountain?" Teel protested, shirking the idea of consuming more of the fireproof elixir. Cinelgen shook his head."How often do we get to see such unique parts of our kingdom?" he smiled, though he did not improve Teel's mood. The Goron miner chuckled."Unique," he repeated. "You are funny. Call it what it is, Hylian, it's hell."Cinelgen narrowed his eyes, squaring up to the bulky Goron miner. They were the same height, the Goron as robust as Cinna was lean. "I'm not Hylian," he snarled.The Goron was unaffected, waving Cinelgen away. "Ah well, I can't tell anyhow."A few days here, Link thought. Is Cinna worried that travelling down the mountain will allow me to escape? It only occurred to him then that Cinelgen kept exclusive watch over their stash of elixirs. No better way to keep a man in line than to hold his life in a vial.Cinelgen had calmed down, and was leaning against the wall of the workshop, watching with folded arms as the Gorons set to work on the diamond. The rest of the group were waiting outside; the party never split. Cinelgen called it bad luck."Don't look so concerned," Cinna chided him. "I'll remind you this was your idea."I'm not concerned for you. Link just smiled. "I know this isn't the nicest place.""We can hear you, lad," one of the Goron's grumbled.Cinna sighed, running a hand through his messy red hair. "That's time enough for us to see Rudania then," he suggested."Maybe, but I might be needed here,” Link had no intention of letting Cinna get close to a Divine Beast. Not after what happened with Ruta. He chewed his lip, trying to suppress his frown."No," Cinelgen said. "I've made up my mind. If we're stuck here, I want to do something productive." ***One last diagnostic. One last check. Malice everywhere; even on the control terminal. Medoh would be a stubborn Beast to fly. Beside her, Teba was adjusting the draw of his bow, shivering."Are you afraid, Teba?"She expected the warrior to shake his head, but Teba nodded. "Always," he frowned. "Every moment."Three days had passed since they had arrived at the Flight Range; Teba had since sent Tulin home on his own, while he and Zelda remained to wait for their wounds to heal. She had watched him embrace the fledgeling one last time, whispering something in his ear, before giving him a gentle nudge back towards the village. And Tulin seemed resolute, launching himself into the air with ease.For three days they planned, and prepared. They would fly together to Vah Medoh, and Zelda would use the Sheikah Slate to induct Teba as Pilot. He would launch the Beast and take it as high as he could, before sealing the entrances. Finally, he and Zelda would return to Rito Village to confront Elder Kaneli. Simple enough.But when she thought of each step in the sequence, the plan seemed less and less straightforward. What if Teba was not accepted? What if they could not seal Vah Medoh? And stood at the precipice of the Flight Range ravine, gazing towards the gargantuan body of the Divine Beast, Zelda understood then that it was just herself and Teba in the way of Cinelgen's plans. A Princess in hiding, and a Warrior in mourning. Not the partnership she would have chosen.But she had no other choice and no time to doubt. The sun had begun to rise, and daylight would soon rush to meet them. They needed all the waking hours they could get."I'm ready when you are," Zelda said, and Teba nodded, shouldering his bow and kneeling to allow her to climb onto his back. Zelda carried her own Sparrow bow, with its limbs painted in white and gold, though she no longer bothered with arrows. Three swift beats of his wings took Teba to air, and together, they ascended towards the rock spire of Rito Village.The winding walkways and suspended huts soon passed beneath them, and peering down over Teba's shoulder, Zelda noticed a congregation forming at the top level of the village. Rito of all colours, their voices raucous, Elder Kaneli standing before them. What's happening? She wanted to ask Teba, before realising that he would know no better than her. The question would have to be answered later.Vah Medoh was perched somewhat precariously on the rock spire, its broad wings splayed outwards, and its body raised skyward - practically vertical. Not a particularly convenient configuration. Typical Revali, Zelda thought dryly. The Divine Beast's main control unit was situated on its back, among a field of ancient columns that stuck out of its body like spines. Normally the induction was simple, but with Medoh's upright position, they would have to complete the process on the rotated control unit itself, balanced several hundred feet above Lake Totori. Zelda swallowed her fear. You've survived falls, she reminded herself, though it did not calm her nerves.Teba flew them up and over Medoh's wings, descending onto the angled control unit. He landed deftly on the unit's bud-shaped housing and knelt to allow Zelda to dismount. Carefully, the high winds howling in her ears, she crawled along the control unit towards the terminal itself, which rotated on its side as with everything else. Fingers shaking, breath taut, she tapped the Sheikah Slate against the terminal.At once, Medoh began to shake with such ferocity that Zelda nearly lost her balance on the smooth stone of the control unit. But eventually, the Beast settled, unleashing a shrill squawk that Zelda was sure could be heard across all of Hyrule.Simple as taking a photo; Zelda held the Sheikah Slate towards Teba, instructed him to keep still, and waited patiently for Medoh to react. The Beast screeched again, longer this time, and Zelda read aloud the words with excitement. "Accepted! Teba of Rito Village, I officially induct you as pilot of Divine Beast Vah Medoh."Teba just shrugged. "Great. Where's the flight deck?"She pointed to the terminal. "This is the flight deck.""That? What do I do?""Why don't you come find out?" Zelda shuffled back to let him pass, and Teba slowly crawled towards the terminal. "Piloting the Beasts is more instinct than anything else."With trepidation, he leant down to place a wing against the terminal - and Teba gasped. He seized backwards, eyelids fluttering, muttering what the hell was that, and his wing snapped from the terminal. The Beast shrieked again."Go on," Zelda smiled, watching with anticipation as Teba placed his wing against the terminal once more. She had tried, and failed, not to steal a glance at the lake below."Vah Medoh!" Teba cried suddenly. He locked eyes with Zelda. "He spoke! They can talk? But… but they're just-""Automatons?""Did you know about this?" Teba was breathless. "I could see it all… as if its eyes were mine," And then he began to laugh, a real laugh, full of joy and sheer delight. "Why didn't you bring me here earlier!? This is fantastic!"Zelda chuckled nervously, pressing herself closer against the still rotated control unit, still the only thing between her and several hundred feet of air. "Please just launch him," she said."Alright, alright," Teba placed his hand on the control unit again. "Let's get out of here, Medoh."The Divine Beast shook once more as its legion of ancient propellers creaked to life, the rhythmic whirring pulsing through the entire structure. It lurched forward, giving one final screech. The propellers roared, the Beast rumbled violently, and Zelda wrapped herself even tighter around the main control unit.Teba had closed his eyes, and his body tensed. The roaring from the propellers quietened into a steady hum. The warrior was muttering something to himself, though Zelda could not hear, and finally, with a jolt, Vah Medoh was launched upwards. Slowly, steadily, still shuddering against the force of its own propellers, the Beast began to rise.Both Teba and Zelda tumbled down from the control unit as Medoh began to right himself, and they stood to find that, at last, the Beast's wings were flat with the horizon. Teba kept a wing to the terminal while Zelda surveyed the area. Vah Medoh's outer platform was as wide as its wings, and the stone beneath her feet was mossy from age. She counted over two dozen of the ancient columns, all half ruined or collapsing. And her diagnostic had been correct; Malice clung to the outside of Medoh, as well as within, and a particularly gruesome piece gurgled on the main control unit."Can you tell me how high you can go, Medoh?" Teba asked, and he nodded at a response that Zelda could not hear. "As high as you like," he grinned, relaying the message.She patted him on the arm. "You're a natural, Teba."Teba reeled, clicking his beak, unaccustomed to praise, "Well, I wouldn't-"Oh, so the finest warrior in Rito Village has some modesty? She almost said, but Teba's words and her thoughts were cut off by a sudden shout behind them. Teba's snapped his wing away from the terminal, and moved to stand in front of her, his face drawn, and his muscles held taut.From a passageway leading into the belly of Vah Medoh, four Rito emerged on foot – all familiar, all scrambling across the mossy stone towards them. Yahn was at the front, followed by the green-feather Rylen and the blue Orli, and at their tail was a soft-pink feathered Rito, her hair hanging in loops about her face, the feathers dangling as she moved. When she saw Teba and Zelda, she skidded to a half, her talons scraping against the stone.Teba’s steeled expression dropped for just a moment, and then he looked away from the Rito with shame."Teba!?" Saki cried. "What are you doing here?! Where have you been!?""I could ask you the same thing!" Teba returned."Wait – you two again!?" Yahn sneered. "When will you give in!?"The four Rito stood before them; Saki stunned into silence, Yahn chuckling, and Rylen and Orli passive, but ready, both eyeing Zelda knowingly. She noticed that Yahn’s wing was still in a bandage, though some had fallen away, revealing the veiny, purple-red corruption. Malice."Leave us," Zelda addressed Yahn, stepping from Teba's shadow. “Tell Cinelgen he cannot have this Beast.”Yahn put his wings to his waist "You think Medoh was his only plan? You should see what he’s got in the Castle, and what he’s got your hero doing!”Zelda clenched her jaw, taking a deep and measured breath. “If he harms Link, in any way–”“You’ll what?” Yahn taunted her. “Storm Hyrule Castle again? You have no allies, except old man Teba. The Rito have chosen a new ruler, and it isn’t you.”Meanwhile Teba had no time for his former apprentice, his furious glare saved only for Saki. "Why?" he seethed at her.The Rito woman met Teba's insolence with her own. "I had to do something!" she snapped. "You spend all your days at that Flight Range! You disappeared for three weeks with our son! Rito Village has been floundering for years, Teba!""Had to do something?!" Teba pointed an accusing wingtip towards Yahn. "Helping this idiot? Going behind my back?""How would I have told you?" Saki countered. "Would you have cared?""That isn't an excuse!"In the soles of her feet, Zelda felt the familiar rumble of Medoh's propellers change, and weaken. The platform began to shift."Kaneli told me he had a plan," Saki began to explain. "... and Yinli told me not to involve you! He… he said that you wouldn't agree, but that he was sure his son could help us!”"His son works for a madman! Of course I wouldn't agree!""I didn't know that at the time, Teba!""But you know now!" Teba looked between the blank, bewildered faces of the Rito before him. Rylen and Orli exchanged a concerned look, while Saki furrowed her brows. “You do know, don’t you?”Rylen folded his arms at his chest. "Kaneli spoke of a great man, from Gerudo," he said, and Orli nodded, and turned to Saki, "The one to unite Hyrule, under a new regime?"Yahn scowled, his hand on the hilt of his dagger. A silent threat, but a pointless one. Come dance, then, she thought as she sized up him up. I know a song we can sing. She mirrored Teba’s stance behind her, a hand held at the ready to draw her bow.Saki had not answered. The trio of expectant faces left her stammering, backing away slowly as no words came from her open beak."Tell them," Zelda urged.Yahn seized her by the shoulder. "You will do no such thing.""Hands off her!" Teba snapped, storming forward. Zelda jolted after him, pulling him back. The platform began to shift again, faster this time, and she felt her body lift just slightly from the stone. The clouds had begun to recede above them, and the thought was little more than a pulse in the back of her awareness; we're falling."I don't understand," Orli frowned. She gave Rylen a nudge. "Why is there an issue?""I-" Saki began."Tell them," Teba said. "You've been to the Castle, haven’t you? What did you see?"Saki wrenched herself from Yahn's grip, looking down her nose at the smaller Rito. "I wanted to believe what you were doing was right but… the food shortage here… all because the roads are closed… all because of the attack on the Zora…and… our couriers. Our own people, Yahn. How could you!?""Enough!" Yahn snapped."What does Yahn have to do with the food shortage?" Rylen pressed. “And our flyers?”Teba did not relent. He pointed to Rylen and Orli. "Tell them!"The pulse was stronger now. We're falling. "Teba..." Zelda said."The war," Saki began. "I tried to ignore it… tried not to believe we caused it…""I said enough!" Yahn bellowed. Saki ignored him, speaking only to Rylen and Orli. "Please, just go home," she urged. “We’ve made a mistake.”"Teba!" Zelda cried. We're falling! She ran to the control unit, placing a hand on the controls, but as she was not the pilot, she could do nothing."If we can tell Kaneli what is happening out there," Saki continued. "He can stop it, before it’s too late–"Her words became a shriek as Yahn brought a fist hard across her face. Then there was a blur of white as Teba shot foward, swift and precise, tackling his former apprentice to the ground as Vah Medoh suddenly lurched sideways, its entire right flank dipping.The stone fell out from underneath her. Zelda screamed, her stomach leaping into her throat as she plummeted down the steeply sloping platform. She was slammed hard into one of the ancient pillars, but managed at the last moment to wrap her arms around it, her legs whipping out underneath her. There was nothing to stand on but air, and when she looked down, she saw clouds. The propellers revved ferociously, but the Beast continued to fall.Above her, the Rito had scrambled. She caught wisps of bright colours as they darted through the air. The black and white of Yahn and Teba, airborne, tussling, swooping and diving as they traded blows. The streak of pink that followed, desperately trying to pry the two Rito apart. And the blue and greens of Rylen and Orli, chasing close behind in a vain effort to make sense of the sudden fighting. Zelda kicked, dangling high above the thousand foot drop back to the earth, heaving through terrified gasps as she tried to keep hold of the stone pillar. Medoh lurched again, this time to the left, and Zelda was thrown back down onto the floor of the platform. Only the Beast did not stop, its left side continuing to arc downwards, and soon she was scrambling to find something new stop her descent.Zelda slid helplessly across the now platform, back towards the main control unit, landing on an ancient pillar just thirty feet from the terminal. Yahn and Teba slammed into the stone platform beside her, springing apart and careening down the towards Medoh's left wingtip. Saki followed above, shrieking for them to stop.As she passed, the Rito woman turned back towards Rylen and Orli, who were still in pursuit. "Go!" she shouted, wheeling herself around midair to face them. "Get everyone out of the village! This thing is going to crash!"With hasty nods and waves, the pair of Rito disappeared over the edge of the platform."Get back here!" Yahn shouted, vaulting himself off the steep platform and racing through the air after them. Teba had done the same, wings beating as he chased after the black-feathered Rito.As Medoh slowly began to roll again to the right, Zelda climbed down onto the horizontal platform, releasing her desperate grip on the stone column. She sprinted towards the main terminal, entirely unsure what she would do when she reached it.Teba and Yahn were not done. They met in the air once again, exchanging blows, rolling and spiralling over each other, with Saki at Teba's side, and then Yahn's, her pleas for them to stop unheard.Medoh lurched against, this time backwards, and Zelda managed to grab hold of the smooth stone of the control terminal just as she lost her footing. The Beast was silent, the rumble from its propellers having completely disappeared. The only sound was the rush of the wind as the ground raced towards them.Desperate, Zelda slammed her right hand down on the terminal, the crisp Royal Crest searing in a powerful golden light, and her vision blackened, the voice booming within her.
Keeper. I am compromised.
Zelda opened her eyes and saw darkness. "What's happening?" she cried. She was no longer on Medoh, but rather in an endless void. Across from her was a figure shrouded in shadow, her green eyes stern and shining. Then the darkness splintered, shattering into light. Zelda covered her eyes, only to find she was back on Vah Medoh. It spoke again.
I require help.
"How?" Zelda called out to the Beast. She could feel its entire make; every gear, and every core. She closed her eyes and was awestruck by a vision of the curving horizon of Hyrule, presented before her in its full glory. The Beast answered.
The Three.
“The what? I don’t understand!”
Keeper of the Three. I require help.
The three? Three what? Zelda looked down to where her hand was held against the terminal, and suddenly noticed the trio of triangles against the back of her palm. The power! With all her might she surged her magic into the control terminal, feeling it in her veins, in her skull. No longer physical; something spliced from reality itself. She could taste the Malice within Medoh on her tongue, and exultant, she fought back against it. The corruption cowered, withering just slightly under the force of all her might – though she realised with dismay that it was not destroyed.Vah Medoh began to lift once more, its propellers droning to life. Zelda's hand stung. Her mouth was dry. Once Vah Medoh had regained what seemed like its full power and had returned to a horizontal position, she slumped from the control terminal and fell limp against the ancient stone platform.The still brawling Rito barreled down onto Medoh's back, having been airborne once again. Yahn leapt to his feet, followed closely by Teba, who threw a wild punch towards him. Yahn dodged, returning the strike in double, and shoved Teba to the ground. Saki fell at her husband's side."Please stop, both of you!" she shouted.Zelda's whole body ached. She could barely move, managing only to pull herself onto her knees. She looked up, and saw Yahn advancing towards her."So you're the pilot!" he snarled, brandishing his dagger. "Not the old man!"Zelda!" Teba was on his feet and launching himself into Yahn before either Saki or Zelda could react. They tumbled to the ground again, but the apprentice rolled away, and in a deft motion he grappled and pinned the warrior against the stone. Yahn raised his dagger, so high that it glinted in the sun."NO!" Saki screamed. She bolted forwards, desperately wrenching the blade away from Yahn's wingtip, and in a single, almost unseen motion, she buried it deep into his neck.Yahn choked and spluttered, face twisted with disbelief as a trickle of crimson snaked gently down his neck. Saki wrenched the blade free, dropping it as though it had burned her, and Yahn fell back against the stone.No one moved. No one spoke. Zelda had not even gasped. She blinked stupidly at the gruesome pantomime before her.Saki took three steps backwards, her face leaden. "I'm sorry," she whispered, and gave them one last horrified look, before taking wing, and disappearing south.***As it turned out, only Cinelgen was interested in accompanying Link to Bah Rudania. Inglis, having grown up in Akkala, was not fond of the heat, while Aurelia simply wanted to go nowhere near what she called a 'mountain ready to blow'. Marlo was already struggling, more than Inglis, his feathers made for the frozen climate rather than the boiling, and Teel had refused to stay on the mountain any longer than a day, and had left that morning to wait for them at the Foothill Stables.If Yunobo had any suspicions, he did not show them, and he chatted happily with Link as they hiked up the mountain. The Goron youth recounted seeing Rudania attack the Castle, and plied Link for details on the battle. Link told him that the Princes he sought was just a story, and Yunobo thankfully believed this lie without hesitation, for Link had not figured out how to explain away her absence."Tell me about this Beast," Cinelgen beseeched of Yunobo as they approached the summit."Uh, well, I don't know much!" Yunobo admitted with a laugh. "But I know he's in some dormant state. And that he was once piloted by the Champion Daruk. He was my ancestor, you know. It's kinda funny."Cinelgen's attention piqued. "Your ancestor?""Yeah, well, yes." He tugged on the Champion scarf that he wore around his neck. "At least I was told that."Link heard the now familiar menacing curiosity in Cinna's voice. "So maybe you can pilot Rudania?""Uh, well-"Yunobo was cut off by a piercing screech that soared through the air from the west, echoing across the rocks around them. The trio turned in unison to look, and in the far distance, Link saw Vah Medoh on the spire of Lake Totori. It jolted forward. It seemed to shudder, once, twice, and a third time, until it finally lifted off from the rock spire of Lake Totori. "Woah!" Yunobo gasped, Rudania forgotten behind them.Link watched in silent awe as Medoh climbed into the sky, screeching once again. Zelda! He wanted to cheer. You did it! He wanted the dance, he wanted to sing, but could not, for their joy did not last long. After barely a few minutes, Vah Medoh stopped, seeming to wobble and shudder, until it banked steeply to the side, and then the other, tumbling through the air."No!" Link cried out, unable to stop himself. His legs were carrying him forward as if absurdly he could reach her in time, and he yelped as he was suddenly constricted at the neck. Cinelgen was yanking him backwards by the collar.Yunobo startled. "Hey, what–?""What are you doing?!" Cinelgen barked.“Get off!” Link wrenched himself free, a strong hand shoving Cinelgen backwards, but the Gerudo grabbed hold of him again. This time Link elbowed him fiercely, managing to connect with the Gerudo’s collar bone.“You dare–!” Cinelgen’s eyes flashed with rage, but they were outshined by the brilliance that suddenly came from Hebra.In the distance, Link caught sight of Vah Medoh at it flashed with a golden radiance, and after a few moment began climbing once again. Her powers! She'd done more than just launch Vah Medoh. She was cleansing it, somehow.Alone, he thought, alone and without me.Link looked back towards Cinelgen, and then back to Yunobo, and then out across Hyrule towards Hebra. His neck ached where his collar had strangled him, and Cinelgen was demanding to know what was going on, but all Link could think about was that Zelda was out there in the sky and she was alive, and that he needed to help her in any way he could. He heard his own voice say, but she doesn't need you. Link didn't care."Is-is everything alright?" Yunobo asked nervously.No more disguises, no more lying, no more masks. He was a Knight of Hyrule and would always be, in service to the one he was appointed to protect.Link spun around, landing a punch hard against Cinelgen's gut. The Gerudo gasped, stumbling backwards, a choked sound escaping his lips. Before he could retaliate, Link swiped a foot against the Gerudo’s legs, knocking him to the ground. He turned to Yunobo."I lied. There is a Princess. She’s alive and she needs help!” he said urgently. "Her name is Zelda!"Yunobo barely seemed to process any of this, but still he said, "What? A Princess, really? I thought–”“Just trust me! Take some people, go to her!”“I– Okay– Where?"Link pointed to where Vah Medoh flew. "There! Find her! Help her!"By then Cinelgen had recovered; Link dodged his swift retaliation that came in the form of a fist aimed at his face. "This man is my captor! They've taken the Castle!""That will be all!" Cinelgen spat. He brought his bony fingers around Link's neck."Hey! Hey!" Yunobo shouted, storming forward. Cinelgen dodged, using his momentum to slam Link into the rocky mountainside. Yunobo careened past them, down the mountain path, crashing into a pile of rocks just ahead of them. Cinelgen wasted no time; he slammed Link against the rocks again. Link’s vision flashed white and his eyes rolled in his skull, the pain blossoming from his temples to his toes. He heard the voice again. She survived without you. Launched that Beast without you.Yunobo was alive but dazed, calling out in a muddy voice, “Hey now… don’t… don’t hurt ‘im!”From his position sprawled on the ground, Link became vaguely aware of Cinelgen moving above him. He saw the Gerudo draw his bow, and pull from his quiver a shimmering, blue arrow, which he loosed casually in Yunobo’s direction. Link heard the Goron shriek, heard the sounds of shattering ice, and then felt the thump of fleeing footsteps. He shuddered, the disappointment nearly as bad as the pain; Yunobo was gone.Before Yunobo or any of the Gorons could return, Cinelgen dragged Link back down the mountain. They cut past Goron City, stumbling down rocky passes and outcrops, over rough volcanic terrain and gurgling rivers until the scored land cooled and they reached the Foothill Stables. Link was too injured - too weary - to fight back."We gave your our trust!" Cinelgen seethed, throwing Link to the ground by the pig pen behind the stables. "And you betrayed us - betrayed me!""You think I was on your side?" Link rasped. He stumbled to his feet, skin tingling, body throbbing with pain. His skin was grazed all over, and he realised then that there was a long gash over his brow that was curtaining blood down his face."Then you lied to us!" Cinna said, wildness giving way to wrath. "You've been working with that automaton for how long and you never even could control it!""Oh I could! Rhoamet answers to me and only me! I was never on your side, Cinelgen.""Then whose? That Princess's?!""Always," Link stood up as straight as he could. "And some day soon, she's going to return and take back that Castle." Without you."You're a fool if you think that. She's alone, wherever you sent her! You think she's survived this long?"Link pointed west. "Didn’t you see? That Beast was all her!" And she was fine without you. What were you ever for? His pride dissolved into a frantic, inconsolable sorrow. "I am a fool, but not as much as you are!"Cinelgen threw a punch, swinging wildly and Link did not flinch. He caught the blow with his cheek."Do it!" he challenged as he regained his balance. "Kill me!""You'll die for that girl?!"Link surged forward, his face only inches from Cinelgen's, fingers digging into the rough fabric of his tunic. "She doesn't need me! She doesn’t even want me!" He was shouting now, a new pain in his eyes from where the tears gathered. "So kill me, Cinna! Kill me now! I've died before, it wasn't hard!"The Gerudo grabbed Link by the collar, and wrapped his hands tight around Link's neck. He closed his eyes and prepared for the pain. Ready to feel the last of it. But his captor just made a disgusted sound and tossed him into the dirt. Teel had found them then. Cinelgen motioned for her to tie Link's hands in binds."We cannot kill you. We need someone to fit the diamond," Cinelgen said once it was done. "And you will make a valuable hostage."They left him there until dark, but Link was grateful at least that the dirt was soft under his head. Words are worse, he thought as the pain coursed through him. Words hurt more. But he'd been wrong there, he realised, as he'd been wrong about so much in his clumsy attempt to play manipulator with his captors. He searched for a new mask to wear, and found none. Not the Knight, not the researcher, not the spy.He was himself at last.***There had not been time to clean themselves up. Teba's white feathers were still spotted with blood, and Zelda was still queasy and broken as they stood before Elder Kaneli. Vah Medoh circled the village above them; Zelda had run a final diagnostic, right before they descended from the Beast. The Malice had receded somewhat, but would return soon. No time. Never any time.Half the village had come to witness the meeting. They whispered amongst themselves at the strange sight of the dishevelled Hylian girl, and the injured Rito warrior before them. Zelda tried not to see the suspicion in their faces.Elder Kaneli rocked gently in his chair as Teba spoke. "Yinli is dead. Yahn is dead. My wife is gone. Vah Medoh is dying. Whatever you plan was, it failed."The old owl bristled. "I have no idea what you speak of."“I don’t care what you admit to me,” Teba scowled. “Or what Yinli or Cinelgen promised you. What matters is it’s over.”“I do not know any Cinelgen.”"But you do!" Rylen suddenly said, emerging from the crowd with Orli. They had returned to the village as Saki instructed. "Why did you never tell us what was happening out there?""Because it would mean the alliance was a failure," Teba said pointedly. "It didn't deliver the Rito into glory, it started a civil war."The Rito murmured. A war? They whispered. But we're not involved."We did no such thing," Kaneli said."But if you did..." Teba peered around at the crowd. "I heard talk of a food shortage. Judging by these angry faces, we’d better fix whatever’s causing that.""There is a shortage of grain from Necluda due to some danger on the roads, nothing more!" Kaneli insisted."And goat's milk too!" someone in the crowd said. "And fish from Lanayru!" said another.Teba folded his wings at his chest. "Sounds bad," he said knowingly, trapping Kaneli in one of his harsh glares.Zelda produced a blue and white neckerchief that she had pulled from Yahn. She held it out to Kaneli. "Have you seen this before?""I have!" Rylen cut in again."As have I," Orli added. Kaneli remained tight-lipped, squirming."Bandits all over Hyrule are wearing these," Zelda went on. "Yahn carried one. Yinli wore one around his neck. Isn't that right, Rylen?"Rylen's face dropped. "They did. We did, for a time.""Yahn said it was just to help stay together," Orli answered. She gently took the scarf from Zelda's hands. "He said it was a symbol of the future, where the Rito would have purpose once again! But he never told us the Zora King was attacked, or that Hyrule Castle was taken.”“Or that our own couriers were being held at Hyrule Castle! It’s true, isn’t it Kaneli! That’s why they haven’t come home! You sold us out, and you won’t even say what he promised you!”"You don't have to listen to this girl!" Kaneli protested. "Yahn warned us about her! A Hylian mage, a witch, come to destroy Vah Medoh!"The Rito were uproarious then. Zelda opened her mouth to argue whenTulin's voice suddenly burst through the crowd. "That’s not what she is!" he cried, racing towards his father. Teba took him under his wing. "You saw Vah Medoh turn gold, didn't you? Right before it stopped falling!" He looked up at Rylen. "She saved it! She stopped it from landing on the village!"Rylen gave Zelda a long, hard look. You tried to kill me, she remembered. Those bomb arrows nearly killed us both. The broad Rito looked up to where Vah Medoh hovered. "The fledgeling is right. She saved the village.""In style too," Teba flashed her a grin. Kaneli was bumbling, muttering at the affront, but Zelda ignored him. She saw some in of the Rito nodding, and leapt at the opportunity."Then listen to me!" she said, addressing the villagers. "You are running out of food, and conflict on the roads is slowly destroying our home! Your Elder allied with those who started it, but he couldn't have known - none of us could!"“Yes, exactly,” said Kaneli, awkwardly scratching his crown feathers.“That doesn’t mean you’ll get away with this,” Teba snapped.Zelda addressed Kaneli directly now. "Help me uproot these bandits from Hyrule Castle, and I will see to it that the fighting ends, and that your people do not starve."For a long moment Kaneli thought on this, scratching his feathers and rocking in his large wooden chair."I still don't understand!" Orli said. She held Yahn's neckerchief tight between her wingtips. "Yahn called you a Princess. Kaneli says you are a mage. Saki said you were a bard. Who are you then?"In her periphery, Teba was smirking, murmuring wouldn’t we all like to know?"Right now, it doesn't matter," Zelda said. "I just want to help, and I want to end this chaos."Kaneli stood from his chair. "Fine! But I have a condition," he announced."You are in no place to negotiate!" Teba growled.The crowd jeered. Yeah! Get rid of the old bird! They cried. Kaneli did this to us!Zelda held a hand out to them. "No, listen to him."Kaneli lumbered out of his hut, his round form wobbling as he walked. He peered up towards the sky, and pointed to Vah Medoh."Do what Cinelgen's people could not," he said. "Vah Medoh is unwell, you say? Then cure him. Return him to us, and the Rito are yours."
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
They met on the landing. It was new, unnamed. Revali naturally suggested they name it after him. Zelda listened patiently as he re-explained his argument; that he was, after all, the best archer in the village, a master of aerial techniques and above all the premiere fighter amongst the Champions.
"Well, enough about me," the Rito Champion said, and for once she thought he might act humble. But Revali was not one for surprises. "Tell me this chosen boy snores in his sleep, or is a terrible cook - anything Zelda," he urged as she rolled her eyes. "Our hero can't be all that."
Zelda sighed, not wanting to think about her new appointed Knight. It was bad enough that she couldn't even come here without Link, let alone that everyone, including Revali, plied her for gossip or stories of his exploits.
"I don't want to talk about him," she murmured, pressing her lips into a thin line, and tightening her grip on the railing of the landing.
Revali sighed, feigning a casual disdain. "Of course, me either," he muttered, but then, with a sudden honesty, he placed a wing on her shoulder. "But promise me something. If he ever mistreats you, you tell me," Revali clicked his beak, leaning in close, "And you tell him to go pluck himself."
Zelda covered her mouth to suppress her giggle. "Revali!" She scanned the landing to ensure that no one had heard.
"Look, kid," Revali went on. "Just stay you. Don't define yourself by his presence. So what, he's got that little darkness sealing sword. Urbosa tells me you’ve worked just as hard as him."
She waved away the praise. "I would hardly call dedications and prayer 'work'."
He gave her shoulder a squeeze. "Well, your dedication is quite impressive, Princess, and dedication deserves its own reward."
Coming from him, perhaps it was true. "I just wish I knew how to help."
Revali crossed his wings at his chest. "You will find a way," he assured her. He turned his gaze to the horizon beyond the landing, to the gentle slopes and plains, and the splendour of their kingdom. "You know as well as any of us, that sadly, you have no choice."
It took a few days for the villagers to stop complaining about the noise. The rhythmic, vibrating chk-chk-chk from Divine Beast Vah Medoh's propellers was constant now as the ancient bird circled the village in a continuous patrol. Teba reported hearing its voice in his sleep, and sensing its presence even at its great height. He said that if he held still he could be up there with it; that when he closed his old eyes, the ancient ones would open. He's bonded well with his Beast, Zelda thought. Better than any of the others had.Zelda found him meditating, knelt at the centre of his home, his wings on his lap and his head bowed. Tulin was not with him she noted; likely off playing with Kass' daughters. Enjoying the afternoon, as all children should.She sat at down Teba's side, and placed the mug of Hyrule Herb tea that she had brought from the kitchen on the floor in front of him. The steam rose in wisps, dissipating into the chilly air."Tea for you," Zelda said. Teba's eyes did not open. "Drink," she said and pushed the cup towards him.Teba spoke in monotone, his attention elsewhere. "I don't drink tea.""Well, Hyrule Herb is good for you. It's a cure-all.""Hyrule herb is good for colds, and other infectious illnesses," Teba corrected her.Zelda lifted the cup, allowing herself a short moment to savour the warmth, and held it out to him. "Your melancholy is infectious," She moved it closer to his face. "Drink."The warrior's broad chest rose and fell in a drawn out huff. Under his sharp brows, his amber eyes flickered open, and he took the mug from her hands, bringing it to his beak for a single, cursory sip."There, not so bad, see?" Zelda said sweetly, and for a heartbeat she was sure he smiled.A certain peace had befallen the village after the incident on Vah Medoh. They had time to rest; whatever she had done to the Beast, she had subdued the Malice within. The next step was destroying it. Though how, I do not know. She thumbed the fabric of Link's tunic. Do you?The food shortage remained, but the outrage was tempered - honed into a purpose. Every hour Rito warriors and apprentices were calling into Teba's home to offer their services as fighters, or discuss the plan to end the war. Rylen and Orli came together to offer their apologies, and unravel the mystery of this Gerudo they had been aiding. Zelda weaved the story into a concise and damning tale, and when she was done, Rylen half swore to kill Cinelgen himself."Snake!" he hissed. "Using Yinli's own son to turn our advisor against us, and our Elder too!"Orli had made the mistake of asking where Saki could be, at which point Teba broke from his charged silence to order the visiting Rito from his home. It was then that Zelda had fetched him the tea, barring any visitors to let him sit alone at last.Zelda rubbed her right arm while Teba sipped the tea - she had landed on it during her tumbles across Vah Medoh, rendering it stiff and sore, though thankfully it was not broken. The entire incident had left her badly bruised - a patchwork of mottled purples and reds, and sickly greys and yellows. But she was surprised to find that, aside from the dull, pervasive ache, she felt hardened. Emboldened. She’d caught her reflection in a mirror at the inn and was startled at the apparition before her. It was quite unlike the Princess who had emerged from Hyrule Castle nearly half a year before. She saw what seemed like a stranger; with short, messy hair, muddied clothes and face, and stern, marbled eyes. Someone half wild, but surviving out here, flourishing even. Someone alive, for the first time in her life. Will you even recognise me? she thought.Teba kept a steady, lofty watch on the horizon beyond the threshold of his home. He sipped the tea slowly, movements measured, seizing control where he could find it. Zelda knew the look in his face however; she had seen it in others, felt it in herself. He is not here.Careful, reassuring as a warm-hearted governess, she ventured to cross the wall he had raised around himself, "She will come back, Teba.""Uh huh," Teba rasped."The way she spoke. It sounded like she only wanted what was best for the village,"Teba raised the mug to his beak, and grunted. "I'll bet." He took a long sip as Zelda continued, emptying the cup."And Yahn…" The image of the black-feather Rito's body flashed through her mind, slumped against the stone, sleeping in a pool of blood. "You know she was only trying to protect you. She'll come back Teba, I'm sure of it."Teba lowered the mug and looked at her at last."Well you wanna know something?" he frowned. "I don't need convincing. I already believe what you're saying. I just want her to come home," He squinted at the horizon, as if Saki could appear at any moment. "I'm not even angry anymore."Zelda tried not to be surprised; Teba had plenty of reason to reject Saki, to curse her for what she had done. But in his silence she felt no lingering resentment. His forgiveness was the absence of the fury he deserved."You truly hold nothing against her? Even after...all she said?"Teba chuckled. "I could, but I don’t have to. They make unconditional love sound so strange, you know, in the stories. They don’t tell you it’s real, but it is.”He held the mug of tea close to his beak, breathing in the rising steam."I admit I can hardly believe it," Zelda said. “You two seem so… different.”A smile softened his granite features, and he spoke like a young man, smitten once again. "Saki hides her fierceness under pretty braids and dainty clothes, but it's a disguise, just like yours was. No one expects quick wit from her, or strength. Before we married she was going to become a diplomat, in service to Elder Kaneli. She has a real talent for being agreeable. For making you do as she pleases, and wanting to as well," He gave Zelda a nudge. "Reminds me of someone."She nudged him back. "I’ll have you know I’m a Princess. I was raised to give orders.”Teba laughed. "I believe it," he said.Above them, Vah Medoh circled into view, its propellers thrumming dutifully. "At least we still have him," Teba muttered, looking at his Beast.Zelda reached for her golden harp, now keeping it hooked to her belt, and ran her fingers idly across the strings. Kass had only taught her two songs; her own lullaby, and the ancient hymn. She chose the hymn, not wanting to weep. Feeling the sting of the strings against her fingers, she began to play."It hurts, you know. I can feel the corruption, like bugs in my skin,” Teba said. “We don't have much time. Two days tops before he falls out of the sky."Not enough time to find Link then, Zelda frowned inwardly."Do you think Kaneli is being honest?" she asked as she continued to play. "He'll support me if we cleanse Vah Medoh?"Teba grumbled, scowling at the mention of the village Elder. "The old owl might be an idiot, but he isn't a liar.”"Then we will keep to our word," she decided, anxiety striking deep within her chest. "Somehow. Without Link." It was the last thing she wanted. The last thing she could have imagined.Teba pointed up at the Divine Beast, confusion faltering his stony expression. "Wait - so that thing you did with Vah Medoh? That wasn't it?"Zelda shook her head. "That was only half of it. The ritual needs us both. Or at least, it needs the Sword. I don’t know. I’ve only done it twice.""So what did you do?" Teba squinted thoughtfully, but Zelda felt no more clarity than he did."I just…I don't know," She ran her fingers over the strings of her harp, trying to recall her actions and thoughts. "I placed my hand on the control terminal, used my power, and suddenly I was somewhere else…some other place. I could see a woman, and I could hear something, a drone, a chant or..."Her fingers froze. Or a song. She looked down at the harp in awe."What is it?" Teba urged when she fell silent."A song," Zelda whispered. The song. Always, in the back of her mind; each time they performed the Cleansing Ritual, inside Vah Ruta, at Akkala Citadel, within Vah Naboris. Zelda blinked and felt as though the world had been changed, the realisation hitting her like a whip. The song! she wanted to shout. The song Link had spoken of. The song that warmed the Sword. The song Kass had taught her. One of the songs Lexo had sung for her in a past life, in the garden of roses, with Link at her side in a Castle not yet ruined, under a sky not yet blackened. I know this song, Link had said. And now, Zelda did too.Teba gave her a shake, and the vision flickered. "Zelda?""I know what to do," she managed. "Teba, I know how to cleanse Vah Medoh!"Before Teba could not question her further, there were footsteps behind them, and a spirited looking Tulin bounced into the hut. He stopped in front of them them, hopping gleefully from foot to foot. "It's done!" he announced. "Can we show her now, Father?""W-what's done?" Zelda muttered, the vestiges of the shock from her realisation only just beginning to fade. She shot Teba an apprehensive look. He held out a wing to his son, surreptitiously calming the excited fledgeling. "I believe we can," he nodded, and Tulin clapped.Teba stood purposefully, a suppressed smile on his face, and Zelda knew something extraordinary must have happened to cheer him like this. He held a wing out to her."We'll continue this later?" he offered. Zelda nodded, took his wing, and followed the Rito from his home."Okay, you can open your eyes"Teba had led her down through the village, wingtips over her eyes the whole way as they brought her to whatever it was that was 'done'. Tulin had bounded on ahead, practically squealing with excitement.Zelda opened her eyes to find she was in the tailor's shop. Her hand flew to her mouth. "Goddess…" she gasped. Tears nipped at the corners of her eyes, bringing beads of warmth and pain. "This is…it’s beautiful."It was hung on a Hylian-sized mannequin at the centre of the tailor's shop; a deep blue navy coat, with a warm collar and wide sleeves. A single row of buttons ran down the left breast, and adorned at the shoulders were two sets of feathered pauldrons; in blue, and yellow, and green and purple. Strapped over the coat was a leather snowquill chest piece, just like Link's, the interweaving leather forming a sturdy, shapely curve at the waist, and wrapped across that was her own red and white Rito sash. The tailor was hovering behind the mannequin, grinning happily at Zelda's reaction. Bewitched, she ambled forward towards the coat, reaching out to run her hands over the fabric. Wool, thick and soft."Teba and Tulin helped me with the design," the tailor said. "And Tulin made your wings."She looked back at the white-feather duo behind her. They were both smiling; Tulin with his wingtips balled into fists, and Teba with his crossed at his chest, standing tall, and proud. "My...wings?" she asked."When a Rito comes of age, they are given their armour," Teba explained. "The pauldrons are their wings, and signify that they have mastered the skill of flight. Some people think the colours matter, too.""Purple isn't an easy dye to find," the tailor commented. "But Teba insisted. It's rarity means it often signifies-""Royalty," Teba said, giving Zelda a knowing look.She gazed back towards him, stunned, a thousand thoughts in her mind but only three words on her tongue, "I can't fly."Teba shook his head, and approached the mannequin. "Didn't stop you, Sparrow. You jumped into Hebra Plunge to save me. You stopped Vah Medoh from falling from the sky," he lifted the leather chestpiece and coat from the mannequin and held them out for her. "You're not Rito, but you earnt your wings all the same. Plus, all your clothes are his. We thought you could do with something of your own."Zelda looked down at what she was wearing; Link's tunic, Link's snowquill pants, Link's winter boots. Teba was right, and so she donned the Rito coat and chestpiece, quietly ecstatic to find that they fit snugly. When they brought her to the mirror, she realised the girl she had seen the evening prior was real."This is the kindest thing anyone has ever done for me," she told the trio of Rito as she appraised her reflection. "I can never repay you.""You know how to repay us," Teba said. He pointed upwards, the implication clear. Vah Medoh.Zelda nodded. She had the song. She had the Sword. She had her wings. And peaking out from under her armour was the cerulean blue of Link's Champion tunic. I have everything I need but you. It would have to be enough."Are you ready then?" she asked Teba. "I can't do this without a pilot."Vah Medoh rounded into their sights once more. Teba closed his eyes, his soul momentarily up there in the sky with his Beast, and when he looked back down at her, he said, "Lucky you've got the best one in the village."***
My name is Link and I…
He passed the time by trying to finish the sentence. Sometimes he managed to, but mostly he could not. Everything had changed, though some things were familiar. The cantor of the horse. The chill in the air. The bite of the binds around his wrists, and Inglis' breath on his neck.My name is Link, and I can feel. He was captive again, wholly captive now. His stupid outburst on Death Mountain had seen to that. And now his skin stung where the rocks had cut him, and his bones ached where Cinelgen had hit him. His chest burned where the knowing was - the four words that ended his charade. She doesn't need you.He could have run. He could have fought. But he didn't. What was the word? Broken. My name is Link, and I am broken. But at least he was himself. Whoever that was in the mishmash of identities he had taken since his awakening. There had to be someone in that wildness, someone in that chaos who he could know was truly him.Inglis asked the question as they left Eldin. "Why did you do this?" Innocuous. Innocent, almost. Not an interrogation so much as a genuine concern.Link wasn't sure how to answer; if he even could without being overheard. Cinelgen rode ahead in a stormy silence, with Aurelia by his side. Marlo and Teel rode behind, with the wagon, the housing unit and the finished diamond. It seemed that he was free to talk. Free. Link could say what he liked now. It was dizzying. And the only answer was the first one. My name is Link and..."I'm the Hero of Hyrule," he recited, the words a mockery."No," Inglis said decisively. "Heroes don't do what you did, sneaking around, lying, then giving in. Heroes fight.""I was fighting.""By doing what? Being an asshole?"Link bristled. Maybe this was an interrogation. "Why do you care, Inglis?"He felt Inglis shrug, and sigh. A light snow had begun to fall. Link caught the flakes with his cheek, and they soothed the throbbing pain. Winter brought strange silences. And they all meant something.Inglis finally spoke. "You were nice to me," he said in a thin voice. "...when you weren't using me."I never used you, Link thought defensively. Except when he had. Another silence. Link bit his lip. He could say anything he wanted. He could lie now, just like he had been, for weeks and weeks. But he struggled; the truth had become novel, it seemed."You don't need to apologise," Inglis muttered. "Like you said, fighting.""I'm sorry. Really." Link said, and he knew he meant it. He made note of the feeling, filing away the honesty for reference. A piece of his own puzzle; My name is Link, and I can regret.Cinelgen had moved further ahead; Aurelia was beginning to lag behind. The Gerudo barked for them to keep up, kicking his own horse into a faster canter. Link winced as Inglis did the same, causing the ropes to rub harder against his skin."Why did you do this, Inglis?" Link asked as they sped along the path. "Cinelgen doesn't treat you very well.""You know why," Inglis answered.Was it love or something simpler? Link hadn't been able to answer, though Inglis' affections were clear. Milagre on the other hand was unreadable, grey eyes yielding nothing, her long hair shielding her face. Inglis pulled back his horse; they had drawn in too close to the horses ahead. An empty winter forest of sturdy oaks closed in over the path, their bare branches like bony fingers, clasping together to make an archway overhead."You know, that's one thing I never understood about you," Inglis said once they were out of Cinelgen's earshot."What?""Why you never tried to escape. Don't you want to see her again?'Her. They each had a her, Link realised; a name unspoken that seemed to be their undoings of late. It almost made him laugh."Course I want to see her again," Link answered. "But...it didn't work out between us."You wanted to send me away...said you liked me better before. Even after all this time, Link could still see her face, hear her voice, her anger and her rejection of him. A snowflake landed on his lips. It burned the way she had, that night in the rain. He told himself to forget."Yeah, but you still care about her." Inglis countered. "Else you wouldn't have lost it on that mountain."The Akkalan was right, Link knew, and it stung more than the binds. "You're chatty," he said wryly, tiring of the conversation."You're finally you. I couldn't talk to you properly before.""And you're not meant to talk to me now, remember?"Inglis was undeterred. Maybe he was rebelling, Link thought."I'm just giving you an answer. Mila matters to me," There was a richness in his voice then, with just a hint of loss. The sound of memory. "I wasn't me before I met her. She taught me how to wield a spear, she gave me my first taste of wildwine. Took me to the top of Karusa Valley. We drank a whole bottle. Best night of my life.""I'll bet."Inglis ignored the jape. "I had no one before I had Cinna, and without Cinna I'd never have had Mila," He went on. "I'd have no one without him. So that's why I stay. We're nothing without the people we care about.""Well, I didn't stay for anyone else," Link argued weakly."Yeah you did, Hero. You stayed for the Guardian. You named it. You had me sneak you down to the Lockup just so that you could talk to it. We do everything for others, Link, even when it hurts us.""You're smarter than you look," Link said. Inglis kicked his horse to move faster, and Link nearly yelped at the jolt of pain against his wrists as as the binds pulled at his broken skin."And you're smarter than you should be," he snapped. "I'm still your captor, remember?"Link said nothing. A conceding silence; he had forgotten about Rhoamet, somehow. Forgotten entirely why he had dragged Cinelgen all the way to Death Mountain. In his madness at seeing Zelda launch Vah Medoh, he had forgotten the one thing that did in fact need him.Link played the game again as the snow fell heavier, numbing his cheeks, turning his lips blue. Captive he might be, but he still had work to do. My name is Link, he thought, and I have a Guardian to free.The Gatehouse was cast in a moody blue as the afternoon light began to fade behind the clouds. All throughout the Castle, the oil lanterns were popping out like stars, flickering in the snowy breeze. But the most brilliant source of light however, was from within the Gatehouse itself; the vivid orange luminescence that was painted across the Guardian's outer shell, accenting his winding swirls and organic markings, as well as the tips of the ear-like handles atop his head.Cinelgen had wasted no time once they returned to the Castle. He rallied his people and marched Link straight to the Gatehouse to treat with the Guardian. It felt as though the entire Successor number had come to see the meeting. Two dozen bandits, all with their spears and swords, lined the walls of the arena, and guarded every doorway, their weapons forming a spiny ring of steel around the Guardian. Cinelgen's Successors all scowled as Link was led into the room; word of his betrayal must have travelled fast.Inglis and Aurelia were at the Gerudo's flank, ready with their halberds as always. Even Milagre had come to stand guard, her own spear brought to bear. Her long white scarf was draped across her shoulders, a brilliant river of silk again her Yiga reds and tanned skin. The ochre hue of dusk glinted off the gallery of spears and other blades, almost matching Rhoamet's muted orange glow. He was huddled at the very centre of the room, surrounded on all sides by pointed weapons. Threatened; that was what Link had learned the deep hue to mean. I feel the same, he wanted to tell the automaton."I'll need good light to fit the diamond," Link said.Cinelgen did not regard him; he had said little more to Link than barked orders since their fight on Death Mountain. This time was no different. "We're not here to fit the diamond.""What?""You're going to give me the code," Cinelgen said, the words ground between his teeth. "Call me a fool all you want, I'm not stupid enough to let you arm that thing before I can control it." Cinelgen grabbed him by the shoulders and shoved him forwards. "You know it in full. Show us."Link looked to Inglis. Had he told Cinelgen the truth? The Akkalan sensed his question, and shook his head. Then I won't tell either. He walked up to Rhoamet, and placed a hand on the automaton's shell. The orange cooled, turning blue as the morning sky."Hey buddy," Link whispered. "I'm back."Rhoamet began to blink; Hello Link.He smiled. "You do remember me." But the Guardian said nothing."The code!" Cinelgen barked. "You will spell it out for me.""Everything is gonna be fine," Link whispered to Rhoamet, before turning to face Cinelgen. "You have the code," he said defiantly. "I already gave it to you."Cinelgen stormed forward, seizing Link by the collar once again. The room tensed, a ripple of movement rounding the bandits as they readied their weapons, unsure of what to expect. "You gave me half of it," Cinelgen spat. "Where is the rest?""I don't know it. All I can do for you now is fit the diamond.""Lies!" Cinelgen shook with rage. "Give me that code, or else."Link grinned wickedly in the face of his captor. "I told you to kill me. And you didn't. Your threats are nothing now."Rage burned in the Gerudo's green eyes, his lips quivering at the affront. Link sensed the punch coming, and almost didn't feel it when it landed. The cold had numbed him. The older bruises had hardened his skin. He was a Knight, and had faced much worse in his lifetimes.He didn't even wince it when he hit the ground - although he could taste the fresh blood in his mouth. The metallic flavour made him think of the Master Sword. Goddess help Cinelgen the moment that blade was returned to him.The Gerudo sank his boot into Link's gut. "I will have it!" he shouted. "You hear me!?" He kicked him again, and again, and still Link did not feel. My name is Link and I am a Knight. At the periphery of his senses, he heard a swell of shouts, and the drum of shifting boots against the ground. He looked up through blurred vision to see a growing beacon of light widen behind his captor. Cinelgen did not notice, his rage turning him blind and deaf.Rhoamet loomed, stepping purposefully and menacingly into view, body fading from anxious ambers, to the livid, harrowing pinks. Link felt his breath hitch; the instinct there to run, to scream, to flee before the bolt of searing energy caught him. But then he was smiling, almost cheering, as his Guardian launched a striking leg towards Cinelgen.A blur of red and white pulled the Gerudo backwards just in time, and the segmented limb sliced through the air where the his head had been. It arced above Link, so close that he could have reached up to catch it. The blur became Milagre, and she threw Cinelgen from Rhoamet's line of sight, turning towards the Guardian with her spear angled."Control it! No – kill it!" Cinelgen roared as he scrambled to his feet. In an instant, a dozen of the bandits threw themselves onto Rhoamet, including Milagre, but the Guardian flailed, throwing them off. It stumbled wildly across the Gatehouse arena, careening from side to side, legs thrashing and trampling any bandits who fell underfoot. The pain had come for Link in a wave then, winding him and keeping him pinned to the ground as he tried to stand. He cried out, reaching for his Guardian, but spat blood.In the chaos, Rhoamet swatted Aurelia across the face, a sharp foot throwing the Yiga woman to the ground. Inglis was at her side in a moment, as was Milagre, and as they hauled her away, Link heard her wailing, anguished screams, saw that her golden hair was splattered red.Rhoamet continued to thrash, this time scurrying across the dirt floor towards a group of bandits armed with bows, their arrows pinging weakly against his shell. His glowing eye pulsed angrily - if his laser had been functional, there would be no survivors. Those that could were fleeing then, abandoning hope of subduing even an unarmed guardian.Inglis broke from his hold on Aurelia and ran toward the Guardian with his halberd raised, desperate to quell the chaos.Wait, stop! Link thought, pulling himself weakly to his feet. You'll only get yourself hurt!"Hey! Hey! It’s okay!" Inglis shouted at the panicking Guardian, leaping into its path. "Calm down! It's Inglis! You can calm down!" Rhoamet's cylindrical head jolted and whirred, locking his beady eye onto Inglis. He scurried forward, the other bandits forgotten, angry reds gleaming from the etchings on its shell."Inglis!" Link cried, stumbling across the arena towards the Guardian, who held a segmented leg raised, the claw twitching as it prepared to strike the Akkalan boy. Link reached them just in time, throwing himself in front of Inglis with his arms held wide. “No!” he shouted.Rhoamet froze, slowly lowering his leg to the ground while the rest of the room watched in silence. The bandits had retreated, but kept their spears pointed forward as always."It's okay, buddy, it's just me!" Link said, and gingerly he reached a hand forward, just as the first time he and the Guardian had met. With a steady, now assured hand, he touched the shell of ancient stone. "Hey there, it’s only me," he said, smiling up at his companion.Gradually, Rhoamet began to calm, shell cycling a myriad of colours until finally, he became a soft blue. Link, he said, repeating the pattern of blinking over and over.Inglis relaxed, stumbling backwards with relief. "Thanks," he whispered."It’s nothing. You’re okay?" Link asked.Inglis smiled weakly. "You've got a way with him.""Well, isn't this nice!" Cinelgen sneered, sauntering towards them with a grin like a sickle across his face. "You're helping each other out? Are you friends now?""Cinna, please-" Inglis said."Shut up!" Cinelgen snapped. "Don't presume to speak to me, traitor, you're no better. I know about your little tryst!' He clapped Link hard across the shoulder, so much so Link winced and started backwards. "Thank you for placating your pet. But I'll just remind you why we're here."Link scowled up at his captor as though he had never seen a weedier man. "Threaten me and Rhoamet will never trust you.""Rhoamet? You named it?" Cinelgen’s face ripened with a mixture of frustration and delight. "What have I always told you? It isn't one of your Beasts! It's a machine! You think it can trust?""It can, you just saw--""Shut up! Shut up!" Cinelgen shrieked. "I didn't say you could speak!" The Gerudo turned to Inglis and wrenched the halberd from his grip. "You think it feels? Do you?"Before Link could answer, Cinelgen spun around towards Rhoamet with the halberd in hand. In a single, fluid motion he brought the blade down hard across the joint of one of the automaton's legs. Link felt a choked scream catch in his throat. Even Inglis cried out when the metal limb was sliced clean from the joint. Rhoamet reeled backwards, blinking furiously and scuttling away in terror as sparks flew from his severed limb. Link tried to chase after him, but Cinelgen brought the halberd forward, and held the point to his neck."Damn you, Cinna!" Link cried. "You are a fool. Are you going to cut off a limb each time I refuse? You'll kill him!""You're right," Cinelgen said, nodding slowly. "I won't cut off one of its limbs, that would be cruel," he pressed the point of the halberd harder against Link's neck. His eyes flashed, the fire behind them cooling into a calculated menace. "I'll cut off one of yours."Link could not move. The sincerity in Cinelgen's voice was paralysing; this was a threat he was not afraid to act upon. In the corner of the room, Rhoamet had pressed himself against the far wall, head turning sporadically from side to side, anticipating another attack. I'll get you out of here, Link promised silently, hoping that this was one he could keep.Cinelgen nodded to Inglis and Milagre. "We're done here," he said. "Let's get our brave Champion back to his cell."He spun the halberd in his hands and drove the pommel hard into Link's chest. The air flew from his lungs so fast that he couldn't even cry out, and before he hit the ground he knew;
My name is Link. And I am ready to leave.
***Sky above. Ground below. Zelda hummed the song to calm her nerves. That ancient chant - over and over, until it was embodied within her.As before, the Master Sword warmed in response. As did the mark on her hand. A positive sign, she noted. The Sword was strapped over her shoulder, feeling strangely light. But even then it was resisting, leaving a niggling feeling of discomfort arcing up and down her spine. Zelda wanted to promise that she would return it to its Master soon, but try as she might, she couldn't even be certain he was alive. One thing at a time, she resolved, and focused at the seemingly impossible task at hand.Divine Beast Vah Medoh rumbled beneath her feet, and intermittently it began shudder. Its strength was wavering as the Malice dug deeper into its inner workings; time was running out, as always. Shaking from her own nerves, Zelda conducted a final check of her gear; her coat was buttoned up tight, with her snowquill armour worn overtop. The Sheikah Slate was strapped to her belt. And the Sword was at her back. Teba was stood at the controls, a guiding wing at the terminal, his face stilled with focus.Everything was here. She could stall no longer. This is how you go home, she told herself. This is how you return to him. With that in mind, Zelda swallowed hard, and cleared her throat to speak."Vah Medoh," she called. "Your sister Naboris told me of a rule that hinders the ritual I seek to perform." She shot Teba an anxious glance in anticipation of an answer. After a moment the Rito nodded, his wing still held against the terminal: he's listening."She told us that you need to be at rest for the ritual to proceed," Zelda went on. "Perhaps, in a low power state, so that you are not damaged."Teba closed his eyes, hearing the answer that she could not. "You're right," he said eventually, face tightening into a frown. "And that is a problem."Zelda cocked her head to the side. "It shouldn't be," she was cautiously hopeful. "We can land Medoh on the rockspire, and power him down there."The silence that followed told her she had spoken to soon. Teba's wingtips curled against the terminal. He looked down at his talons, gathering the strength to speak, and with pained trepidation he said, "...no, we can't. Medoh's talons are jammed in the stowed position.""P-pardon?" His words were almost drowned out by the constant beating of the propellers. Perhaps she had misheard.But Teba was adamant. "We cannot land," he said firmly. "Thought your Slate would have told you-""Well it didn't…!"Just then, Vah Medoh shook violently. His propellers whirred, a low whine filling the air as they struggled to maintain power. Teba spun around towards the terminal, murmuring softly to soothe his ailing Beast while Zelda gripped onto one of the ancient columns for balance."We can't perform the ritual in the air!" she cried. "We'll crash!" Her mind worked quickly, seeking a solution, any solution, as Vah Medoh dipped and banked through the air.Teba's focus had not broken from the controls, and Vah Medoh soon begun to recover. As the last of the tremors receded, she stumbled to Teba's side, and placed a hand on the terminal next to his wing. Gasping, she was nearly overwhelmed, and her head reeled backwards as Vah Medoh's enormity of spirit filled her senses. There was a bitterness on her tongue that tasted of dust, and decay."He's worse," Teba said. "Getting sicker by the hour. We need to do this ritual now."Zelda drew her hand away, and spoke to clear her mind. "We cannot land," she murmured. "But we must power him down." And then, louder, focusing, "We cannot land. But we must power down."The understanding dawned on her as she repeated the words, over and over like a prayer. Zelda's eyes snapped open, and she and Teba turned to each other in unison, arriving at the same thought. The same, unfathomable idea. Zelda snatched the Sheikah Slate from her belt, hurriedly checking Vah Medoh's vitals. He was already beginning to lose power, half of his propellers sitting idle and the other half weakening."This ritual…" Teba said urgently. "How long do you need?"She cast her mind back to the mere two times she had performed the Cleansing Ritual with Link. "A minute?" she guessed."Alright," Teba nodded. "Pushing it, but it could be enough. We can still put Medoh in a low power state-""-we'll just do it from the air," Zelda said, finishing the thought. "Goddess, Teba…" she breathed. "This is insane."The warrior just laughed. "Is it?!" he said, a gleam in his eye and a childish grin on in his face. "Good! I've always wanted to do something like that!"Teba refocused on the control terminal, and straining under its own power, Vah Medoh began to ascend. The platform quaked, the air churning around them, and the clouds rushed past them at speed. In the unseen distance below, Hyrule receded beneath their feet."So, we climb as high as we can, and then power down," Teba explained, raising his voice over the roar of the propellers. "You cleanse him as we fall, and we'll start him up again."As Zelda nodded in agreement, a chill gripped her. A tight hand in her chest, yanking, and the old voice that she had been hearing her whole life cut through the Vah Medoh's droning; you will fail, it said. "But...what if we crash?!" Zelda demanded. "What if I can't complete the ritual in time?!""I'll get you out of here!" Teba assured her, not a single hint of doubt in his voice. He's waited his whole life for this, Zelda realised. And he doesn't even know if it will work!"You really trust me this much?!"They tore through a cluster billowing of clouds, the air around them turning white. Zelda was blinded, and Teba disappeared. Vah Medoh lurched, but a wing shot out to catch her by the arm before she fell."Funnily enough I do, Sparrow," Teba said. “But--""But what?!" Zelda anticipated the rest, remembering the preposterous bet the warrior had made with his friend. "Don't tell Kass?!"Teba grinned wide, a young man once again. "I’m not losing that bet!"The Divine Beast broke through the clouds at last, and above, they were met by the vastness of the sky. The early rising stars and looming twilight greeted them in a huge, blanketing swath of darkness and light. Zelda scanned the breadth of Medoh's outer platform. Sheikah Slate in hand, Sword at her back, she set about finding a way to secure herself to the Beast.***Link tried to remember a time when he didn't ache in some way or another, and found that perhaps he always had. As a boy, he trained. As a young man, he fought. And now, he collected bruises like butterflies, cataloging them by colour, age, and time of acquisition. He licked his lips and tasted blood, and salt. But for once, the pain did not wear against him. It was armour now. It was stronger than any elixir. It made him bold. And as the trio - the towering Cinelgen, the scowling Milagre and the cowering Inglis - together dragged him back towards the Lockup, Link planned his retribution against them.Perhaps, not against Inglis. But the rest...Link faintly remembered a time when he shirked from wielding himself against people. How times change, and how time changes...They led him, bound and bloodied once again, across the ruined passageways of the Eastern Passage - Inglis at his left, Milagre at his right, and Cinelgen stomping on ahead. Twilight was suspended above them, as was a cloud of malcontent. Link dragged his feet."We could use some help, Cinna," Milagre said, nodding towards Link. "This one is all muscle."Cinelgen did not turn. "It's a bad time, Mila," Inglis whispered."A bad time? Because the Champion is here?" She gave Link a shove, hurrying him along the path. "You told this one all your stories, Cinna. You wanted him to trust you!"Still the Gerudo would not look back. He stormed down the flight of stairs in front of them, down the path that took them underneath the spire of Zelda's old study."I'm talking to you, Cinelgen!" Milagre called after him."Mila, don't–" Inglis tried to calm her, but she ignored him."Do you know what your actions have done? Did you see Aurelia?" Milagre hauled Link and Inglis in turn as she marched down the path in Cinelgen's wake. It was the most impassioned Link had ever seen her. "That thing took out an eye! Because you antagonised it!"Cinelgen shuddered to a halt, spinning on his heel to face them, his face darker than the sky above. "I thought you hated her!" he spat."She is a Yiga! She's one of my people.""I was one of your people!""And you left!"Link could hear her hurt. He felt Inglis' hand tense around his arm in sympathy. Milagre shook as she confronted Cinelgen; from rage or grief Link wasn't sure, and for a moment he almost pitied her. "Do you know how hard I worked to keep the Elders from hunting you down after you killed Secretary Odoh?"The Gerudo threw up his arms. "Not you too. Traitors, everywhere,” he growled. He pointed to Milagre, and then to Inglis, bony finger judging them each. "How dare you, both of you. How dare you.""I - I didn't say anything," Inglis stammered."But apparently you two did everything, and behind my back!""That’s what you’re mad about!?” Milagre said. "It was nothing, Cinna. A dalliance, to keep from dying of boredom in his decrepit place."Link felt Inglis jolt. "What?" he said. "What do you mean nothing?""Well what did you think?" Milagre challenged.Inglis could barely speak. "I thought you...that you...that you cared about me, at least!"Link watched with a detached curiosity. The trio were crumbling, an avalanche roaring in the distance – to far to be a threat, to far to help, but a spectacle from which he could not look away. Inglis had said they would be nothing without each other; so he watched as they became just that.“I’m sorry, Inglis, I though you understood what we were. You were entertaining, a diversion. It never should have happened, but it did. But none of that matters–”“Why not?” Inglis sobbed weakly.“It sure seems like it matters,” Cinelgen added.“It won’t matter if we lose this castle, idiots! And that’s exactly what’s going to happen if you don’t get a hold of yourselves!”By now an entire retinue of bandits was watching. Some snickeing, some with open mouths. Link could hear their whispers, their snide remarks. Their leaders laid bare - just as foolish and petty as the rest of them. Cinelgen stood with arms crossed, scowl growing firmer by the second.Inglis was not done. "So you were just using me then?!" he demanded, his grip so tight around Link's arm that it ached. He turned to Cinelgen. "And you, do I matter at all to you, or am I just another pawn in your stupid master plan?"The Gerudo's face soured, green eyes narrowing beneath his furrowed brows. "Grow up. Stop your whining.""Whining?!" Inglis shrieked. At once the bandits behind them burst into muffled gasps and whispers. But it was not the argument they gawped at."Chief!" cried one of their number. "Look!"And they looked. To the west, silhouetted by the last vestiges of daylight, Divine Beast Vah Medoh was climbing through the clouds. Its whole berth circled and shuddered, rising higher and higher, until it disappeared into the clouds."What's happening?" one of the bandits cried. None had an answer, but Link knew.The Cleansing Ritual, he thought, but knew now not to speak. Zelda had the Master Sword. He could sense it. The first time he had seen Vah Medoh from Death Mountain – what she had done must not have been enough. She was trying again. He closed his eyes, feeling the cool air against his cheeks, and the warm hum where the otherworldly sensation of closeness was. It’s okay, he said to the Sword on the other side of the world. I’m here. If he held still, he was at her side.***
I'm okay if you're okay, I'm okay if you're okay. Goddess, Link, I really hope you're okay.
Teba had helped tie her to one of the ancient columns with some rope stored in the inventory of the Sheikah Slate. She waited with the Master Sword drawn for his signal, running fidgeting fingertips over her feather pauldrons. Her wings. She hoped against hope that they would let her fly.Teba had assured her she would be fine during the fall."It's the re-ascent that will hurt. The more time you give me, the easier it should be."He was stood back at the terminal, taking Vah Medoh as high as the Beast could climb. Based on Vah Medoh's weight and shape, the warrior had estimated that it would fall stern-side first, and so Zelda stood facing forwards, with the control terminal and Vah Medoh's ancient, all seeing face ahead of her.As they ascended, Zelda spoke to the Sword in the thin hope that it would hear. "I'm not asking to wield you," she whispered, gripping the hilt with both hands, and feeling its fine grooves against her skin. "But I need you to help me. Your Master is held captive in Hyrule Castle. This is how we get back to him."In a voiceless whisper she could have sworn she heard words of assent, but it could have just been the wind.Higher and higher they flew, and harder Vah Medoh began to shake. Hyrule disappeared beneath them, and the air around them froze, tasting stale and empty, almost unbreathable."Can't go much further!" Teba shouted, turning towards her from the terminal. "We'll suffocate before anything else. Ready to drop when you are!"Zelda gripped the Master Sword tighter in hand, noting its weight, and steadying her breaths. It no longer felt foreign to hold, or perhaps the cold had made her numb. Her Rito coat was certainly doing its job; even all the way up here she was only vaguely aware of the chill. A good sign, she hoped.Vah Medoh shook once again. Zelda's heart was pounding in her chest, her blood thrumming in her ears, veins popping from her skin, her eyes only half seeing and her mind barely willing to believe what they gave it. It was so beautiful with the sky around them. So beautiful she almost cried. You will fail, the old voice said. You will hit the ground. You will destroy this Beast."Clouds," she whispered to herself, closing her eyes and breathing long and low. "These thoughts are just clouds." Zelda looked down and saw the bright blue of Link's tunic. What was it she had once told him? I'll always be here. Well he was here with her now. She had to believe he was. His teachings, his tunic, his sly smile as he teased her, his warm arms as he held her. They were all here."I'm ready!" Zelda said.Teba powered down the propellers, and huddled in close to the terminal. "Give me the signal when you're done!" he called back to her. "And remember that I believe in you - and so does Link, wherever he is! I know it!"The ropes tightened around her body. Zelda felt her chest lift, and the air rush past her ears. Vah Medoh dipped backwards, falling down towards the ground, until it felt as though she were lying on her back.Zelda held the Master Sword across her chest, and began to sing.
Across every corner of Hyrule, and perhaps beyond, their eyes turn skyward. A winged beast, somehow soaring despite its body of stone, chases the stars as it rises through the sky. And then, when it is almost out of sight, the beast suddenly loops downwards, and begins to fall.
Warrior, Princess, and the Beast arc down towards Hyrule like a falling star. The Rito opens his eyes as he clings to the stone, and is met with the blinding brilliance. He looks back, awestruck, to see the Sparrow radiant like the sun, her eyes are closed, her face is still, the Sword held firm in her grip. Her hair and coat whip about her, beating like wings. Hyrule is watching, he suddenly understands.
And they watch. From the Rito perched in their village, frozen with disbelief as their Divine Beast rockets towards them; to the Zora in their proud Domain, cursing under their lips; to the women of the desert in the south, gazing curiously across the kingdom; to the rock men in the high mountain with wide eyes and gaping mouths; to the bandits holed up in the abandoned Hyrule Castle, and the appointed knight among them, grinning wide and wild, his soul in the sky, his spirit soaring alongside the Divine Beast; they all watch and they all see as the Beast is enveloped in a golden sphere of light.
Across every corner of Hyrule, and perhaps beyond, they recite a single name in unison. The name of the only person that could ever be responsible for such a fantastic sight; the Princess of Hyrule come again.
She opened her eyes to a stillness that immediately unsettled her, and in the silence realised that her heart was not beating. Darkness all around, but somehow familiar. I have been here before.The figured emerged from the darkness like a mist, walking without moving, like a ripple on a lake or a billow of smoke. "Princess," it said with an ancient voice, almost corrupted. It was shrouded, its face hidden in shadow by a wide hood."Where am I?" Zelda whispered."You know where you are. You called it the Other Place." The figure seemed to smile, amused by the moniker.Zelda gasped. She was here, after all. But where had she just been? In her hand, she became aware of a great weight. The Master Sword. She did not question why she had it."What is this place?""Somewhere lost to time. A place in-between places," the figure answered, turning to look across the infinite room. "A realm created to house a great power, that you, or perhaps a version of you, know very well. But time and ruin have taken its toll. It is now as simple as you call it. It is the Other Place.""The Other Place…" Zelda repeated. "What dwells here then?"The figure spoke slowly, with great reverence. "History. Memory. Legend," Zelda realised then that the figure was a woman. “When you are ready, I will show it to you.”"Who are you?" she demanded. “How did I get here!?"The woman approached, and reached up to remove her hood.She was a mirror - an apparition. The same height, the same age. She had the same face, the same eyes. Zelda looked, and saw herself."I am a part of you," said the woman.Zelda staggered backwards, horrified. "W-what are you talking about!?" she cried.The woman was unphased. "I am a remnant of a being who was once a Goddess. She relinquished her immortal soul to become you. But… souls are funny things. A part of her remained, existing only when you do. That remnant survived, and so did her power. You carry it in your right hand and you carry it in your blood.""I...I don't understand," Zelda murmured, gazing helplessly at her reflection."No matter," the woman said decisively. "You will return here. The Sword is the key, as is the Song."She reached forward, placed her hand on Zelda's chest, and pushed.Flying again. The air a constant onslaught. Hands locked so tight around the Sword that her knuckles ached. Around her, the golden sphere of light finally shattered. The warrior was ahead of her, clinging still to the terminal."Teba!" Zelda shouted, the wind tearing the words from her mouth. "It's done!"Teba reached for the terminal, a wide wing slapping hard against the stone. "Alright, Medoh, let's go!"At once the Divine Beast roared to life, the full power of its inner cores returned. Its propellers revved ferociously and Zelda fought to hold onto her consciousness as the sudden force barred down hard against her chest. She held the Sword firm in her hands, saw stars on a sky of red and groaned under the invisible weight. But eventually, as Vah Medoh began to lift, righting itself and soaring back into the air, the weight lifted.The Ritual was over.Teba hurried to free her from the ropes. "Are you okay?" he asked frantically as she stumbled forwards, struggling to return the Sword to its scabbard. She fell, knees landing hard against the stone of the platform, but did not collapse. Teba was at her side all the same, pulling her to her feet."I'm fine...I'm fine," she panted, steadying herself. "The ritual is just tough.""Tough!?" Teba cried. "Did you see what you did?""I know," Zelda said between pants. "I was there."Something had changed then, in the way that he looked down at her. A reverence. The hardness in his face gone, replaced by wonder. "You really are her, aren't you?" he whispered. "You're the Princess."Zelda pushed off from him, reaching limply for the Sheikah Slate at her belt. "I've always been her, Teba!" she huffed. "No one will let me forget!"The warrior stumbling backwards under the force of her shove. In the corner of her eye she saw him run his wingtips through the spiney feathers of his crown, nervous, jittery - realising the gravity of her true identity for the first time. Zelda focused on her Slate, running a diagnostic on Vah Medoh. Her breath had levelled, the wave of exhaustion from the Ritual having passed. Maybe I am stronger, she thought, thinking of the toll the ritual at Akkala Citadel had taken on her."Zelda…" Teba said slowly. She looked up to see him gazing with open beak at the platform around them, and felt her lips curl into a smile. Vah Medoh looked made anew, his ancient stone clean, and crisp, the moss that clung to the crevices and cracks gone, and the corruption that had infiltrated him destroyed. The Sheikah Slate confirmed what Teba saw. Medoh was cleansed.One thing at a time, but no time for pause. Zelda lowered her Slate, and tucked it back onto her belt. "Gawp later," she told the warrior. "I need to speak with Kaneli."The clear blue of the sky told that the worst was past. The depth of winter was behind them now. Soon spring would come for Hyrule, breathing life back into the trees, sweeping the plains a verdant green, and the flowers would be found underfoot. Zelda looked up at the crystalline sky with hope, and determination, and wrath. Savour this day, Cinelgen, she thought. It numbers among your last.She and Teba stood before Kaneli once more, and again it seemed most of the village was there to watch. Teba held his wingtips clasped at his back, an imposing figure before the plump owl that rocked in his creaky old chair before them. Zelda realised then that she was copying the warrior, her hands behind her back, her stance a little wide. No matter. It made her feel bold."The ritual was a success you say..." Kaneli ruminated, swaying gently in his chair, feathers ruffled by the gentle morning breeze. Teba had made Zelda wait until the next day to meet with Kaneli, perhaps sensing better than she did the exhaustion that clouded her. It wasn't until she collapsed into her bed at the inn, wearier than she had ever been, that she was grateful for his insistence. Now, well rested, she was ready to treat with the Elder of the Rito."Yes, yes," Kaneli decided. "Vah Medoh certainly looks better." The villagers nodded in agreement. Zelda had heard whispers as they walked through the village both the night before, and the morning after. All had seen the golden light, and now those who realised its source had been her bowed their heads as she passed."All of my analysis suggests that Medoh is completely cleansed," Zelda assured the Elder. She reached for the Slate, and showed Kaneli the schematic of the Divine Beast. He squinted at the screen, eyes dancing, and shrugged. "If you say so, and if Teba agrees.""With certainty," Teba nodded."And if I may," Kaneli said as he shifted in his chair. He pointed to the Master Sword strapped over Zelda's shoulder. She was not keen to part with it just yet. "I can't help but notice the sword at your back. Is that the one? The sword that seals the darkness? Are you a Champion-descended then, just like the other one?""More than that, Elder Kaneli," Zelda said. She took a deep breath. She had been reciting the words in her head all morning. They felt cathartic, if a little awkward. "My name is Princess Zelda Bosphoramus of Hyrule. I have used the power passed down by my family to cleanse your Divine Beast. I kept my word. Will you?"Kaneli rocked in his chair, his wingtips clasped together under his wide chin. "Perhaps, I can," he hummed."Perhaps?" Teba scoffed."Well, what is it that you demand?" Kaneli asked pointedly.Teba cut in before Zelda could answer. "The Rito will help the Princess retake her Castle. That is the bandit's stronghold.""Yes," Zelda affirmed. "And we will rescue the Champion-descendant Link!"The suggestion did not seem to have the desired, rousing effect on Kaneli that she had hoped. While the villagers twittered with excitement, the Elder merely frowned. "More fighting. I cannot abide by that."A sudden indignation stirred within her. "You said the Rito would be mine!""Not to make more war!" Kaneli countered."We would be ending the war!" Teba argued, but it was no use. Around them, the Rito wore faces of fear."No, no, no, no!" Kaneli bobbed in his chair as he shook his head. "I cannot send my people to fight! I will not!"Zelda opened her mouth to argue, but had no chance to speak. For from behind them came the stomping click of talons against wood, and not a moment later, a soft-pink Rito woman had marched up towards the Elder, situating herself between Teba and Zelda."Enough, Kaneli!" she said firmly. "You will help this girl. I have seen first hand what Cinelgen is like.""Saki?!" The name was spoken by three at once; Kaneli with indignation, Zelda with shock, and Teba with awe. He was a moment away from crumbling, Zelda saw, trembling as he beheld his wife."I'm sorry," she whispered. "I know you probably don't want to see me-""I did. I do," Teba stammered. "Why...what made you come back?""Yes, Saki," grumbled Kaneli. "Why did you come back?"Saki cast the Elder a stern gaze, and he withered against his chair. "If you all must know," she said, addressing the entire village. "I saw what happened with Vah Medoh. Everyone in the Kingdom probably did. But I knew, when I saw, that only my husband could fly like that." She intertwined her wingtips in Teba's, adding in a whisper, "And that I should never have doubted him."The village around them was forgotten. Zelda saw the rapture on Teba's face; he was all but consumed. A part of her longed for it, the way the Rito looked together, and at each other. The word she had wanted for so long without realising it - partners.Kaneli ruffled in his chair. "Well, it is good that you return. But forgive me if I don't take advice from you, after the incident with Yahn.""I was misled, as you were!" Saki insisted."Your husband talks of war, Saki. Have our people not suffered enough?""Don't you trust us?" the Rito woman countered.Zelda looked around at the faces of the villagers. War. They flinched each time it was said; the warriors with excitement, and the rest with anxiety."It isn't about trust!" Zelda piped up. She looked directly at Kaneli. "Is it?"Again the Elder fidgeted in his chair. The Rito whispered and frowned. Thank you, Cinelgen, Zelda thought. For this lesson you have taught me."I understand some of you are afraid. The people are Hyrule are like leaves in the wind. Scattered and vulnerable. Come the Spring we could all be washed away by the storm."Kaneli has ceased his bristling, and was listening with intent, as was the rest of the village. Teba and Saki had turned towards her; all eyes were on her."Those bandits thrive on chaos. And just as Saki has, I have seen first hand what they will do." The anger returned to her then. The simmering indignation. Once she had turned it on Ganon. Now she had a new beast in her sights. "I will not let them fight back, do you understand? With the strength of Rito warriors, I root them out, and end their reign of terror on the lands of Hyrule."A cheer rumbled through the crowd. Beside her, Teba was grinning proudly."Is this the plan Teba spoke of, then?" Kaneli cut in, struggling to raise his voice above the noise."We just need the Castle," Teba affirmed. "Without that, Cinelgen has nowhere else to go.""And we can use Vah Medoh," Saki offered. "Cinelgen sought to control it. I can go to him, convince him that the Rito retain it for his use, and that they have the Princess in custody. That will give us the time to rally those we need."Still Kaneli held a sceptical expression, his wingtips rapping against his chin.Zelda had one last plea, the words running away from her. By the end of it, she was surprised to realise she believed them. "Everything you wanted from Cinelgen, I can give you, Kaneli. He would unite you under war. I can do the same with peace. I remember the respected couriers and revered warriors of the Rito from my childhood. My father the King said there was never anyone more reliable by land or sky than a Rito. Think is what we can do together, when we rebuild this Kingdom!" When Kaneli did not speak, she looked to the villagers. "So what say you!? Are you with us?!"There was silence at first, until the familiar broad-chested Rito stepped forward. "I am!" Rylen cheered. "For Vah Medoh!" he cried. "For Lake Totori!"Next came Teba, and then Saki. And one by one, the voices grew in number. Zelda's eyes never left Kaneli's. Eventually, with a small huff, he nodded.The cheers shook the morning air, gathering into a thunderous chorus: For Medoh! For Lake Totori! For the Princess! For Hyrule!***Princesses, princesses. Link dreamed of princesses. They never left him alone when he was in this cell - Milagre and Inglis had dumped him back here unceremoniously and left him without a word. At least now he had the strength of mind to determine waking from sleeping. But it was the same dream, and so part of him knew it was true. A memory returning to him. Roses, tears, a Beast, a garden and a song. A new mystery to solve.But not this very moment. He allocated the rest of his sanity to escape, deciding with some regret that perhaps that should have been his first step. This time however, he would not escape alone."We have many spare Guardian limbs at the Lab," Robbie explained. "Re-fitting them though, I admit I have never done."Link had spent the better part of the morning explaining his progress with Rhoamet, and recounting the unfortunate incident of the evening prior."I feel as though I endangered him, Robbie," Link frowned. "Withholding information. Trying to manipulate Cinelgen."The Researcher shook his head. "You were just following my orders, Link. And you succeeded. Cinelgen cannot control that Guardian. He never will now. In fact, I must commend you.""I agree," added Larella from her cell, situated directly across from Link's. "I told you to survive. But you went above and beyond even that. And by your account, Cinelgen's inner circle is crumbling."Link rested his head against the wall of his cell. I don't know how much part I had in that, he thought.After being returned to the dingy Lockup, Link was relieved somewhat to find that Larella, Robbie and Granté were in relatively good health. If anything, Granté had gained some strength, and now sat crossed legged by his father, content to listen, but lucid enough to follow the conversation. Their strength was a good omen; they would need it for their escape.We do everything for others. Inglis had told him that, and Link was unsurprised to learn that Akkalan boy held that particular philosophy. He lived for Cinelgen and Milagre.But Link found himself quietly in agreement. Was that not the creed of a Knight? And perhaps a Knight was not what he was - perhaps he was nothing anymore. But he knew how to fight. And he knew how to help people. If that's all he was, then that would have to be enough.The other captives listened quietly to his plan, and gave their approval. "It is not the path I would expect you to take," Robbie said. "But….well, I never expected to find myself here, either."Night found them anxiously awaiting the instigation of their plan. Link ran through the steps in his head, segmenting them into sequences, flexing his sword hand and stretching his sore joints. The bruises on his body ached, but they kept him alert. Reminded him of the cost of failure.At last, the turnkey arrived with their suppers. He was one of three Hylians assigned to the cells; the other two bandits, adorned as always by their blue and white neckerchiefs, were stationed permanently at the Lockup entrance. Three against one. Link had faced worse odds. The turnkey threw them pieces of bread and hard cheese, as well as a lonesome piece of meat each."Hey there," Larella purred as he approached her cell, pressing herself against the bars."Not tonight, sweetheart," the turnkey sighed, clearly vexed. "Much as I enjoyed your company. Chief is throwing a feast.""Aw," she pouted, grabbing the lapels of his thick winter cloak. "Shame. Though, I never did enjoy your company,"The Ambassador gave the turnkey a sudden, sharp shove with all of her might, and he careened backwards, landing against the bars of Link's cell. Lightning fast, Link wrapped an arm around the man's neck, reached down to his belt and alleviated him of his dagger. Before the turnkey could shout, he sunk the dagger into the back of his thigh, and the man staggered to his knees, his pained shouts filling the Lockup. Fingers moving deftly along the turnkey's belt, Link unhooked the wide ring of keys. In the cells opposite him, Larella was buzzing with excitement, while Robbie and Granté watched with still, mortified expressions.The dagger still in hand, Link quickly opened the door of his cell, and stepped forward to meet the advancing Hylian guards."Get him!" rasped the turnkey, still sunken against the ground with his hands wrapped around his injured leg. "B-but don't kill him! He's the Champion!"Brandishing the dagger in one hand – this one a real dagger and not the dull little paring knife they’d let him have – Link nodded to the Guards. "Come dance," he said, feeling his blood run hot.The first guard swung wildly, longsword gripped clumsily in his right hand. Easy to block, and throw him off, even with the dagger. The second came in with a stab of his short sword. Link dodged. His breath quickened. He had forgotten what it felt like to move like this. As the second guard regained his balance, Link used the opening to kick him square in the gut, knocking the man backwards onto the floor. Behind them the turnkey cursed and groaned, shouting at the guards to pull themselves together.The first had recovered, his left arm lashing forwards to try and catch Link in a grab. He dodged again, and barrelled forward into the guard's chest, throwing him against the bars of Larella's cell. She squealed in delight, but gasped when Link drove his dagger hard into the man's right arm, wrenching his longsword from his grip. He spun around just in time to catch the second guard's wide slice, pushing him backwards with blow after blow, the guard only barely able to block. Each time the steel rang, Link felt a surge of suppressed fury, of desperation, and he began to lose himself to his sword. But the guard had finally had enough, and with a roar he launched himself forward, in a vain attempt to tackle Link to the ground.It took only a small shift in his footing, and a lock of his muscles for Link move out of the way, and slap the man across the back with the flat of the longsword. He spluttered, his feeble mouth gaping in slow bobs like a fish seeking air as he fell forwards. All it took was a swift kick of the boot to wind the man and incapacitate him further. Link turned his attention towards the remaining two guards.With a wretched cry, the first guard pulled the dagger from his arm, and stumbled towards Link, his face wrought with pain. It almost felt wrong, almost felt too easy, but Link had no plans on drawing out the fight. He deflected the guard's weak slice with the dagger, spinning his sword and jolting the guard square in the forehead with the pummel. He did the same again, to the man’s stomach, then his chest, and he heard a wheezing gasp along with the muffled, wet sounds of bones cracking. He was on the ground and writing without any more fight.The turnkey began to scream for help, a hand on his undrawn sword. Link took the dagger from the first guard's hands, and picked up the ring of keys, which had landed forgotten by Larella's cell. He smacked them hard across the turnkey's face to silence him."Did you hurt her?" he demanded, pointing towards Larella."I-I-I…." the turnkey spluttered, beginning to sob openly. "The others did too! I was just following! Cinna said we could! Cinna said--"The turnkey was silenced again, this time by a blade. He flopped to the ground, gasping and shrieking, hands slapping at the hilt of the dagger that had been buried in his neck. Link ignored the blubbering man's cries, knowing that they would not be heard all the way down here, and began thumbing through the keys.“Goddess be good,” Larella said. “And keep these men from your kingdom.”There were more footsteps, now coming from the entrance to the Lockup. Link tore the dagger from the turnkey's neck, holding it ready, only to be met with a breathless, and now horrified Inglis."Oh– Ganon’s ass!" he cried when he saw the carnage. "Link! You just needed to wait! I was coming to get you. There's a feast, I was going to sneak you out!"Dagger still raised, his stance still wide, Link looked down at the bodies – the two guards writhing and the limp body of the turnkey, and then back to Inglis, sickening regret stirring in his gut. He pushed the feeling away. "I did what I had to," he said.Inglis had his hands to his face, fighting back his reching. "Hylia help us. Let's just get them out of sight."Link followed Ingis' lead, hauling the turnkey, and then one of the guards into a dark corner of the Lockup. Inglis reched again once they were done, coughing and spluttering, resting while Link freed the rest of the prisoners: Larella, Robbie and Granté, and a pair of impoverished Rito. There had been other prisoners, but they hadn’t survived the winter. "Why are you even here, Inglis?" Link asked once he was done."You know why," Inglis grumbled. "It was bad enough that she cast me off in front of half of the Successors. But even in private she told me it was over. That she had always planned to rule at Cinelgen's side, no matter what. As his Queen, she said." Inglis coughed again, this time looking as though he really would throw up. "I'm done, Link. I came to free you to spite them, and then I was going to pack up my things and go before sunrise.""Well I'm proud of you," Link said, but Inglis just shrugged, muttering, "I don't feel proud. I feel like an idiot." He stood and scanned the Lockup, silently appraising the prisoners before him, and sighed once more."You know what we're going to ask," Link said. Inglis gave a small, weary nod. One last errand, Inglis, Link thought, clapping his friend on the shoulder in thanks. And then you're free.His many months at the Castle meant that Inglis knew its layout well. The Akkalan led them down the winding pathways and alleys with a casual ease, knowing that most of Cinelgen's Successors would be at the feast. And soon they had reached the waterfalls of the north face of the castle; three tiered plunges and pools that would lead down to Hylia River."You've two strong swimmers among you, so you should be fine," Inglis told them, motioning to Larella and Link."One," Link corrected with a frown. The others looked at him in shock, a weak no escaping Larella's lips. "You'll be going without me.""Why, Link?" Granté asked. "You've done so much already, you should come with us."With a small smile, and a sideways glance at Inglis, Link said, "There's one here who still needs me. He's a lot like me. Born to fight, but pushed beyond that. Made into something he never would have been.""Rhoamet?" Larella asked quietly. Link nodded. Among others, he thought."I need to fit his new diamond. Then we'll leave together," he explained.Robbie had his head bowed in thought, a hand to his chin. The eyepieces of his goggles whirred softly. As Larella assessed the waterfall and the leap they would need to make, the old Sheiakah said, "Your research with the Guardian has been an invaluable addition to our knowledge of them, Link."Link couldn't help but laugh, and awkwardly scratched his neck. "I don't know that I would call it research…""It was. Most definitely." Robbie asserted. "If you survive this, we would very much appreciate if you could bring Rhoamet to Akkala." He reached up to his goggles, and gingerly pried them from his face, before looking up at Link through weary, reddened eyes.Determinedly, he pressed the goggles into Link's hands. "You will need these to fit that diamond, Link. Macroscopic lenses. Perfect for delicate work.""I…I can't…" Link hesitated, though he could not help but turn the bronze goggles over in his hands, admiring the detailing and their diffuse cerulean glow."Take them! I have no sentimental attachment to them," Robbie urged him. And then he scoffed, "Purah wears hers as a hairpin!"Head bowed low in silent thanks, Link looped the cord over his head, letting the goggles hang from his neck. "I don't know what to say.""Say nothing then, Champion. Do as you planned. Get Rhoamet out of this foul place."Larella returned from the waterfall's edge, satisfied that it was safe. She stood before Link, and curtseyed. The lady, as always. "When you see Zelda, give her my regards. And apologise that I couldn't do more here.""There’s no need. You were her first friend. She'll never forget that."The Ambassador shook her head, her face lifting with a smile. "No, Champion," she said with a laugh. "You were."At last the trio of prisoners were ready to make their escape. Larella took Robbie and Granté under an arm each and together, after one final wave, they leapt into the water below."Akkala," Inglis sighed once they had gone. "I haven't been there in years. What I wouldn't do to go to Akkala."Morning was almost come, the last of the stars beginning to fade. They would need to return Link to his cell soon. But the Castle still slept. There was some time at least."I'm going to need your help to get Rhoamet out of here," Link told him. "Is that okay?"Inglis shrugged. "At least you ask." He stood with his body hunched, gazing ruefully at the waters that rushed beneath their feet, his mind elsewhere. Loss and tragedy seemed to pervade this Castle. Link wondered if it was worth saving."It gets a little easier, you know," he said quietly. "The pain. Every day, a little less."Inglis met his eyes, hope dancing on his features among the sorrow. "But you still love her, don't you?""Yeah," Link was surprised at the ease of the admission. Some things he could not fight. "But…it's not important. What's important is that we're both getting out of here, Inglis. And then we'll go to Akkala together."Inglis nodded, sullen eyes brightening somewhat as he smiled at the promise Link had made him. And at that moment, atop the waterfall, with the morning gathering around them, Link knew it could not possibly be a lie.
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
It took nearly half an hour to cross from the entrance to Goron City to the Rock-a-Belly Tavern on the far side of town, given that every Goron and his brother wanted to say hello to Lord Daruk. Link didn’t mind so much, enjoying the sounds and smells of Goron City at night. The place seemed more alive than it did during the day, brothers of all ages out and about along the stone and steel pathways, their booming laughs bouncing off of the crags of Death Mountain above.
At last Daruk led Link into the tavern and said, “As I promised. Dinner’s on me! To celebrate your new post!”
Link grinned and gave his friend a thumbs up. He wasn’t sure if he was old enough to go to a Goron tavern, but maybe the Gorons weren’t great at guessing a Hylian’s age anyway.
They sat down in the middle of the crowded building; there was an open fire kitchen in one corner staffed by at least half a dozen Gorons, and big stone tables and chairs strewn about the large square dining area. On the walls were monster skulls and horns and painted rock carvings of Goron bosses past, and at the far side of the room was a stage. A quartet of Gorons was already playing, each with a shining brass instrument of every shape and size. The tunes they played were thumping and energetic, though it meant the diners had to shout to hear each other.
“Two rock roasts, coming right up!” Daruk said as he sat down opposite Link. “Plus some hops for me, and a lemonade for you.”
Link rolled his eyes. Surely the Princess of Hyrule’s appointed Knight deserved an ale.
“So, how does it feel? Being the most important guy in the Kingdom?”
Link bit his lip and shrugged. He gave Daruk a nervous look. For a moment, Daruk seemed to understand, then he waved an enormous hand dismissively. “Well, she’s only a Princess. She can’t give you much trouble.”
Link nodded, glad when their rock roasts were finally placed down in front of them, along with their drinks. Knight and Champion ate in silence, enjoying the music, until the band then downed their instruments and bowed, departing from the stage. A few moments later, four young Gorons took their place. They wore miners' hard hats, but their wide eyes and pudgy bodies told Link they had probably never been down one.
“Oh, you’ll love this little guy,” Daruk grinned. “It’s the Mountain Song. We sing it for brothers who will soon break their first stone. It’s to remind them that we Gorons work best together, and that we’re always here for one another.”
In comparison with the earlier rowdy band, the Mountain Song was shockingly pure and gentle. Every Goron in the tavern joined in the heartfelt folk tune, which was sung without accompaniment. It spoke of going down into the mines together, and braving this danger for the benefit of all Gorons.
I will roam through the range, Dig the dark ground that smothers, And all the spoils I find, I will bring my dearest brothers Will you go, go-ro, go? And we’ll all go together.
Though Link did not know the words, he felt his soul caught up in their feeling, and suddenly understood why it was sung.
“I’m afraid,” he said finally, turning to Daruk. “To be her Champion.”
Daruk furrowed his brows. “The Princess?”
Link nodded, but felt his spirit bolstered. It would be okay, he decided. If he spoke to her, when he was ready, it would all be okay.
Dusk light shone off the banks of the Millenio Sandbar, and the air was filled with the songs of crickets and frogs in symphony. To the east, Lanayru Tower was a beacon against the steep cliffs that would lead into Zora's Domain. To the west lay Hyrule Field, with the grasses of its sweeping plains finally beginning to peek through the end-winter thaw. And further afield lay her old haunt - Hyrule Castle - where the lady had entered, and had never truly left.At Goponga Village, Larella of Zora’s Domain stood on the precipice. Home was so close. She could almost see it through the trees. Half a day's walk would take her there. But when she looked down at her body - bare of jewels, scarred by fine blades and bruised by angry hands - the thought of returning home horrified her. They would laugh. They would shun her. Stupid girl, getting caught! What abuse? What pain? It was all you.I tried to be strong, she would say. I survived what they did to me.What for? The voices would ask.To help, perhaps. She had helped the Shiekah duo escape, carrying them on her back down the Hylia River. They had been a reason to survive. The old researcher had made time pass with the stories of his discoveries. And his son Grante - once he had begun to speak again - had contentedly shared with her tales of his travels throughout Hyrule and the strange spoils he had found. But now they were gone, back to their home, and nightfall found Larela weeping in the rain, huddled against the wall of a ruined hut.She could not go back. But where could she go?The Castle, she thought. You told Zelda you would be there for her. No. She would never go back there. These wetlands were her home now. The crickets that sang would be her fellows. The lizalfos that prowled would be her neighbours. She could never let the other Zora see…"Ho there! Funny! A Zora, all the way out here?" His voice made her jolt, muscles knotted and ready to flee. Another captor. But before she could move he was there before her, emerging out of the dark, adorned fin to fin in fine jewels, a long cloak hanging from his broad shoulders; a crimson-red Zora, tall, and proud, and regal."How did you even get here?" he asked, but Larella could not answer. All she could think was, No! Not you!Her wits returned, and she leapt to her feet, stumbling as she attempted to curtsey. Anyone but you!"P-Prince Sidon," she managed to say, struggling to regain her composure. "Or... or, King Sidon? Pardon Your Grace, I haven't been home since--""Wait…." The Prince took a step closer, amber eyes measuring her make. Larella flinched, wanting to draw away but pressed against the mossy wall. "...Ambassador Larella?"Her lips parted in shock. She could not meet his gaze. "You remember me? But...I was just an attendant.""Of course I remember! You're alive!" Sidon cheered. He took her hands into his. "Oh, how wonderful! You're alive!"With a whimper, Larella snatched her hands away, and sprung from the wall, running to the bank of the island, overcome. He had seen her. Someone had seen her. Like this. Like this! She wept and wept, not feeling the Prince's bewildered stare from behind her."My lady? Are you okay? What happened?" he whispered."Nothing," she sobbed. She willed him to leave her, and let her disappear, but soon the embrace of velvet enveloped her shoulders as the Prince carefully draped his cloak around her. Larella huddled it tight, shivering, aware of the cold for the first time since she had left the Castle."I just want to go home," she told him. Strength be damned. Judging eyes be damned. She wanted to feel marble beneath her feet. Hear the crash of the waterfalls. Cinelgen could take all of her but her home.Sidon looked at her with solemn eyes that betrayed a sudden understanding. "Home then," he agreed, a measured hand at her back for no more than an instant. "Come. Home it is. Home is best."Somehow, by some ancient magic, the winter did not reach the Korok Forest. Bountiful, swaying grass lined its winding pathways, flanked by fallen logs and drooping vines that seemed to disappear into the mists that hung above her head. Twisting branches arced overhead, shielding this place from the sun, and in some parts blocking it out all together. She caught glimpses of skittering bugs; fireflies in the twilight, grasshoppers between the blades, beetles clinging to the barks of the trees. And peeping out from the crevices and crags, from the between the leaves and behind the branches, the oaken bodies and ethereal masks of the Koroks that greeted her with a muted reverence.She heard their whispers, though she did not see their faces. Princess. The Sword. She's here. They're here, once again!Zelda had come here to return the Master Sword. To leave it somewhere safe before her journey. After all, it was not hers. But the voice within had chosen to help her - had chosen to gift her its power to add to her own and cleanse Divine Beast Vah Medoh once, and for all. Or perhaps, it had received Link’s blessing somehow — during the ritual Zelda could have sworn she felt the echo of his presence. For that, all she could do was let it rest. But just as she was about to plunge the blade back into its pedestal, the booming voice spoke."I think perhaps, you need not do such a thing, Princess."Zelda looked up at the sagely old tree with a smile. "Great Deku Tree - what a pleasure it is to see you again.""All the more to you, Princess. You stand before me changed, but radiant as ever."Indeed she was changed. In outfit and in spirit.“We have all changed, and the world with us,” Zelda replied. Her time in Hebra had taught her that much; bringing the realisation, and the shame, that she had cruelly accosted Link for the inevitable - that he was different, for of course he was. Time and ruin had not stolen him from her, it had let him be reborn anew.Zelda looked back up to the Deku Tree, and its ancient face carved into the rough bark. "I have come once again to leave the Sword in the safety of your care.”When the Tree spoke, it felt as though the entire forest shook. "Indeed, the Sword would be safe in this place. But as with all of us, it has a purpose. It must be returned to him. You are going to free him, are you not? Would it not be safest kept with you, Princess?""But I am not its wielder. I shouldn't even be carrying it.”"Perhaps not. But you have proven yourself capable of such a burden. And I cannot help but notice the crest on your hand," the Tree spoke with a great warmth. "It is good to see the power used to its full potential."Zelda raised her right hand, removing her glove to gaze upon the glow of the Royal Crest. "Yes, indeed. It has been the utmost help," she chuckled then, thinking on all the ridiculous feats this power had enabled her to do. "And strangely, I still have no idea where it came from, or what it is."The Deku Tree paused as if in thought. Zelda noticed the Koroks gathering around her, appearing one by one from their hiding places."There is a legend, Princess," the Deku finally said. "Passed down from tree, to tree, and whispered by the children of the forest, the Koroks who stand before you. It speaks of the goddesses who created the very land you understand today to be Hyrule.""I know of this," Zelda said. "I was taught it as a girl.""Perhaps you were not taught all of it. Stay and listen a while, to the legend of this land."Zelda knelt by the pedestal, laying the Master Sword across her lap. Around her, the Koroks formed an audience by the Deku Tree. Together, they sat, and listened."In an ancient past, three golden goddesses descended upon the chaos that was Hyrule, and shaped the land, giving it life and law. When the goddesses departed Hyrule however, they left a supreme power to give hope to the mortals of the land. This power represented their virtues; the courage of an unbreakable spirit, the wisdom to lead with a guiding hand and the power to create great change. In times past this power has been split, to be wielded by those who most embodied these three virtues. During these times, the Princess possessed the virtue of wisdom, and Hero the virtue of courage, and a challenger against them the virtue of power. But on your hand…"Zelda looked at the Royal Crest once more, pulsating on the back of her palm. It was a permanent glow now – she could not quieten it."Have you considered, Princess, what it means to possess all three?""All...three?" The three triangles on her hand. The three triangles of the crest of Hyrule. The three engraved into the sacred grounds. And then, Vah Medoh's words to her: the Three."Great powers reside within you," The Deku Tree said. "Hyrule requires that you master it. Your battles are not yet done."Zelda nodded, returning the Master Sword to its scabbard. "I will. Link and I will end this together. And when I return, it will be with him. I swear it""And I have faith you will," the Tree seemed to smile then. "Go safely into the wild, Princess. Winter lingers, though I see you are well dressed for it.""Thank you. The Rito of Hebra were kind enough to gift me these clothes when I overwintered with them..." Zelda admitted, fingers twirling through a lock of braided hair."There are more legends than either of us have time to speak of, but I will share but one more, if I may.”“Of course, please go on.”“There was a rumour of a chosen people and their winged companions, living a life in the sky. It is said that their people were the ancestors of all Hyrule. Such a tradition is lost, but to those of the Royal Family, to those with the blood of the Goddess, some bonds are not easily broken, and old traditions forge new alliances.""I...I don't know what you speak of.""The Koroks see all from their hidden places, and they see true. They see the love you have for that warrior, and for his people, the winged Rito of the sky.""Teba!? I-"The Deku Tree continued on, calmly assuring her. "Love is like the sun, Princess. It shines in many different ways. Hot and bright, subdued by clouds, or clear and crisp through a winter's morning. What matters is that it is there at all. For all will die without it."The words of the ancient haunted her long after, as she made the trip out of the Lost Woods. She would have teleported, but Zelda found she needed time to clear her head. Hyrule Castle greeted her just across the river when she arrived at the Rauru Hillside. It was not safe to walk alone; begrudgingly, she pulled out her Slate, locating Sha Wavo shrine on the map.Teba and his family were already waiting for her at the Flight Range. The warrior was sitting by the ravine and working on a bow, adjusting one of the gears. Tulin was asleep by the fire, while Saki prepared a stew in the pot.Teba didn't greet her as she sat down. "You still have the Sword.""The Tree told me to keep it.""Good. I'm glad he did."Zelda frowned at him. "Did you make another bet?"He laughed – a low rumble, now familiar, focus held on his bow. "It's a fine, strong blade. You are more than fit to carry it for now. Beyond that, the Sword is a good reminder for us all of the duty we have, to return it to its owner," Teba met her eye, and shook his head. "Even if I had, Sparrow, I wouldn't bet against you. I would bet for you."Zelda smiled to herself, or perhaps in spite of herself. The Tree had been right. "I'm glad I'm back," she said."You won’t be glad for long," the warrior teased, the slightest hint of sadness in the words. "Now that you’ve seen the green fields of Hyrule again. You won’t miss us, when you go."But I will, Zelda thought. Lake Totori was an island at the centre of a stormy sea, an oasis in a blazing desert. She wasn't the Princess here, at least not in anything more than name. She was just a girl, with a bow, a keen eye and a mentor whose people had become kin."Oh, I got what you ordered," Teba suddenly said, handing her the large parcel that lay in his lap.Excitedly, Zelda took the parcel in hand and began to unravel the string. She giggled with delight as the hessian fell away to reveal two brand new paragliders. One in red and white, and the other in white and blue."Perfect!" she beamed. Link's paraglider had been lost somewhere in Hyrule Castle, forgotten when they had been captured. This would be the perfect coming home gift."One for you?" Teba inquired, and Zelda nodded, "I've always wanted to try."The warrior picked up his bow, and with some struggle he stood from the edge of the platform. With an open wing he pointed towards the ravine, he said, "Go on then. You have your wings after all."Her first instinct was to protest. But then she caught a glimpse of the crest on her hand. I hold the Three, she told herself. I have nothing to fear.She handed Teba the blue paraglider, and took her own in hand. Three breathless strides took her out and over the ravine, where the updrafts caught the fabric of her paraglider and launched her high into the air. She screamed, from delight or terror, it didn't matter. The winds kept her afloat, and if she fell, the power would keep her safe.Soon Teba, and then Tulin had joined her, while Saki watched contently from the platform, occasionally calling out for them all to be careful.They ducked and swooped, soaring until Zelda's arms were so tired that she had no choice but to retire to the Flight Range, her breath ragged and her face wind-swept. But she could not stop smiling, no matter how much her muscles now ached. And adding to the joy, when she and the Rito were happily tucking into their stew, the colourful Rito bard finally made his return."Well, hello there, Princess," Kass said warmly as he landed on the platform. He looked to Teba, who was sitting by Zelda's side. "Am I owed some money, then?"Kass brought little good news. Both Zora's Domain and Gerudo Town were shut down. Both Sidon and Buliara were out of his reach. And a siege was underway at the Geldarm Bridge, with further news of fighting along the roads. They could dawdle no longer - and set about enacting their plan to rally their allies. Saki would fly east toward. Zelda would travel even further east towards Lanayru, and then south to Gerudo, to find what had become of her allies and convince them to help her rescue Link. Teba would remain to protect Vah Medoh, and to prepare the Rito for the assault. Simple in theory, but not so much in execution.Teba saw Saki and Zelda off from the Flight Range a day later. He paced along the planks, his head held high and his beak clenched tight. The picture of collected calm - though Zelda knew the truth. "You both have three days," Teba told them. "After that I am coming to find you.""Let the little Sparrow spread her wings, Teba," Saki chided. "If she is brave enough to do this alone, then she must be strong enough too."The old warrior grumbled, but under Saki's deftly persuasive eye he could do nothing but concede. "Three days," he repeated sternly."I'll be back in as much as two," Saki promised. Zelda wished she had their confidence. With the Slate in hand and Hyrule before her, she felt neither brave nor strong, and certainly not wise at the prospect of travelling so far on her own. But as she rolled her shoulders, the wings on her coat rising and falling, she remembered; Link is waiting."I'm ready," she said, and the Rito returned her words with a pair of steadfast nods.The trio exchange one last look as Zelda activated the teleport function on the Shiekah Slate. Hebra dissolved into light around her, and just before she closed her eyes, she saw Teba give her a curt, salute-like wave; you'll be fine, we'll see you soon.Sparkling brilliance met her as Zelda re-opened her eyes, the splendour almost garish after so much time in the wastes of Hebra. Pale marble filled her vision, as did the gentle rush of running water and the hurtling rage of crashing waterfalls. Before her were a broad flight of stairs, leading up to an unseen courtyard beyond. She heard chatter, and laughter; the squeals of children and the sound of a hammer against metal. Zora's Domain. It had been months since she had been here. She had done so much since then. Become so much. Zelda took a deep breath, and climbed the stairs to the plaza.***
His heart won't stop, as much as he commands it to. He's by the sea when he sees her, the blood in his ears having become the roaring ocean.
Porcelain skin. Eyes of stained glass. The red of her open lips. Tears on the cobblestones.
Her voice is a song. Her form divine. A Princess of truest kind. 'I'm sorry to drag you out here with me...this must not be very interesting for you.'
I go where you go, he wants to say. I want to be where you are.
But he cannot. There are binds around his hands. A gold and purple rope, etched in a diamond-shaped lattice. He pulls and feels the sting. Hot breath on his neck. You just aren't enough, it says.
The Princess fades. 'I understand. Your duty precludes your free will, at least until this is done.'
He thrashes against the binds, his skin ripped raw.
'You called it a burden,' the Princess says. 'You needn't keep anything from me.'
Anything but a burden. A burden in its entirety. Bound and unbound. Free in captivity at last. What does he want? What did he want? Is it her?
He reaches out and catches air. The Princess has turned from him.
'Just promise you won't forget me - or us,' she says. 'But I can't read your mind, can I?'
And then she's gone, evaporating as a jolt shoots up from his foot, through his legs, to his open eyes…
Inglis was above him, gently kicking the sole of his boot. "C’mon, idiot, wakenup," he droned. You're not a Princess, Link thought as he squinted up at the Akkalan boy, the last of the dream still receding. There was someone standing in his shadow. Link caught a glimpse of golden hair and knew; Aurelia.He shot up, running a hand through his hair to shake free the dirt of the cell floor. It was morning still, singular columns of light streaming through the high-set windows of the Lockup cells, catching the dust and dirt that clung to the damp air.He had been there for a week or so since freeing the other prisoners. That had resulted in a beating, but not a particularly bad one. Thankfully, Cinelgen was too distracted by the notion that Zelda was in Hebra to devote much of his time to Link, and the elusive code. After the spectacle that was the Cleansing of Vah Medoh, all of Hyrule would have to now know where the Princess was.According to Inglis, Cinelgen had sent scouts to Hebra - though none of them had yet returned - and had apparently dedicated all of the resources he could to finding her, bar going there himself. He hadn't even had time to assign new guards to the Lockup. Not that he even could. Word of Link's battle prowess spread through the Castle like wildfire – the way he had maimed two guards with ease and killed another – and now none of the Successors now dared venture down to the cells. Inglis and Link were free to plan their escape - so long as Cinelgen did not find out.“What’ve you come here for?” Link murmured, settling back against the familiar moss brick wall of his cell.“My people found your diamond,” Aurelia said. She stood with the right side of her face turned away, a thin scowl slicing her white skin, and a wide bandage wrapped around her face. “It’s in his study.”“Your people?”“The Yiga. Those of us that remain.”“She’s really whipped them into shape,” Inglis said, a thumb pointing towards Aurelia. “But there still infighting. Lots of it.”Perhaps that wasn’t such a bad thing, given the need for as many distractions as they could get – though Link didn’t say that in front of Aurelia. He wondered why she turned away, and began to wonder just how badly she was hurt.He pawed his chest for the Sheikah goggles that Robbie had left him, which he kept hidden underneath his tunic, the strap around his neck. Adjusting some of the gears on the lenses he said, “How long can you get me with Rhoamet?”“How long would you need?” Inglis asked.Link shrugged.“Maybe those will help?”Link shrugged again. He’d had little practice wearing them, and less working on his Guardian. “I don’t want to risk trying anything until Cinelgen is out of the Castle.”“You are right, you won’t have enough time otherwise,” Aurelia said. “He stalks about the Castle all day.”“Could you talk to him? Convince him something needs his attention?” Link asked.Inglis shook his head, face drawn. Link knew the answer; he had seen Inglis comaraderie with Cinelgen dissolve before his very eyes, and perhaps had had some part in it too, he realised with shame.“Knights never concern themselves with the cares of those underfoot," Inglis said with lament. Only bad ones, Link wanted to tell him.It seemed that they had hit a dead end, until Aurelia finally turned towards Link, kneeling down before him.Link nearly gasped at the sight of her. The bandages crossed over the right side of her face, completely covering her right eye, leaving only the left, icy-blue iris staring menacingly out from beneath the cotton. The bandages were bloodied, even now, and from the intensity of Aurelia’s glare, he guessed there was no more right eye to speak of."Aurelia," he breathed. "I'm sorry. I should have--"Her voice was harsh. Devoid of any patience. She held up a hand and said, "No. Don't apologise. Cinelgen is to blame. He provoked Rhoamet by hurting you."Just as before, Link could not look away. Her shimmering eye would have been beautiful if it were not so full of hate.“You see, the damage to your mechanical beast was, ironically, the final act that convinced the Yiga to abandon the Castle,” Aurealia went on. “Our clan formed to revere the great technology of our ancient past. To see it so wantonly treated… There are some of us that are choosing to leave, so I have come to tell you something.”Link swallowed. The Yiga woman had a certain intoxicating charm, he realised. “Go on.”"Not all of us want to destroy this Kingdom, like this Chief," Aurealia spat the title, and licked her lips as if it left a bad aftertaste. "Some of us just want to live in peace, grow bananas, you know? When you see the Princess again, tell her I am on your side. I always have been, in a way."Link's mind flickered back to that night by the fire, when she had come to him with little more than a robe and a proposition. "Is that why…?" he said slowly.What Link could see of Aurelia's pale cheeks filled with a knowing smile. "What better way than to secure allegiance. But I wasn’t aware of your loyalty to your Zelda until this one told me,” she cast her eyes briefly up towards Inglis, who frowned. “And I forgot who you are. How can the Hero of Hyrule ally with a Yiga?"He wasn't sure if she was truly waiting for an answer. Could she be trusted? He looked to Inglis and saw the boy's usual, passive plainness of face. It gave nothing, and neither did Aurelia's singular, piercing eye.All Link could do was shake his head and say, "Who knows."Aurelia's smile widened. "Perhaps this is how we find out, Champion. Change is coming," She stood, and grabbed Inglis by the shoulder, giving it a friendly shake. "Hylia knows this one won't get you far.""Oh, piss off," Inglis groaned, shoving her off of him. Aury clapped him on the back, and winked down at Link. Even now her vibrance excited him, Link realised, feeling immediately guilty. His loneliness had come for him at last, it seemed. And the Princess in his dreams made the wanting stronger.Link pried his eyes away and looked to Inglis. "Anything else?"Inglis and Aurelia shared a look. Go on, Aurelia mouthed. Tell him.The Akkalan spoke slowly, each word a hesitation, a sorrowful scowl on his face, as if ready to catch Link's reaction. "A Rito woman arrived this morning. They have Zelda in custody, as well someone named Teba. She made him pilot of Vah Medoh, apparently."Teba! Link was glad to hear the name. He met Inglis' downcast eyes with a grin. "It's a lie," he said triumphantly. "It must be. Unless they put her in captivity with my sword."Inglis cocked his head to the side, his frown pressed deep against his features. Aurelia too was bemused, looking down her nose at him with furrowed brow."The Master Sword," Link explained. "I can feel her near it. She's not in custody. Whatever is happening, the Rito are lying to Cinelgen.""Are you sure?" Inglis pressed. "Why would they do that?""Ah - to throw Cinna off her trail," Aurelia offered, smiling at the notion. "He will go to Hebra and find that she isn't there."Inglis did not seem convinced. "Then where would she be?" He gave Link an expectant look."I don't know," Link said defensively. "If she has the Slate, she could be anywhere.""Then we must capitalise on this, yes?" Aurelia gloated, throwing her hands open as if expecting applause. "I will convince Cinelgen to leave, for Hebra. I can suggest that he go there himself. Not to waste more time with scouts who get themselves killed in the wilderness."“We don’t even know if what Link said is true,” Inglis protested. “We could be leading Cinelgen right to her.”“Sure,” Aurelia shrugged. “It’s a possibility.” She looked innocent at the two Hylians before her, undaunted by their negative reactions. "What? I might be on your side, but above all I’m on mine. I get Cinna out, then I can get my people out. The Princess is a risk I can take."Link crossed his arms at his chest, vexed by Aurelia's dismissal. "If you are on my side, you're on hers too."The Yiga woman was not phased. "There's no need for anger. If you are right, she will be fine. So you needn't worry.""We need him gone for at least a week," Inglis said, redirecting the conversation back to the issue at hand. "If this works, I'll get that diamond for you tomorrow then, we can head to the Gatehouse now to check on Rhoamet if you want.""No," Link shook his head. "There's a question I need answered before we go."Both Inglis and Aurelia raised their eyebrows at him. "And what's that?" the Yiga woman challenged.The questions that had plagued him; what did I do? What did I say? But more than that. The first question, the one he knew he was close to answering. "Do I really remember her?" he said.***"A Hylian! There's a Hylian! There's been a breach!"It was not quite the reception Zelda had expected. She had not been waiting for warm embraces and wide smiles, but she did not think there would be so much screaming.All-chaos erupted into the plaza of Zora's Domain the moment Zelda reached the top of the stairs. Those that did not stumble away in shock pointed and shrilled for a guard, any guard, to take her away. And a duo of Zora Warriors had begun to advance on her when finally, she was recognised by a Zora named Tula."Princess? Zelda?" the woman gasped, clapping a webbed hand to her mouth. She pulled Zelda into the inn and out of sight. "What are you doing here? Why do you have Link's sword?""Where is Sidon?" Zelda demanded, not bothering with pleasantries. It was only after she spoke that she remembered who the soft-faced Zora was; Tula, the excitable woman who had roped Zelda into the Prince Sidon Fan Club. Auspicious then, that this is who she would run into."I...I'm not sure!" Tula answered, the shock never leaving her features. "With Vah Ruta, perhaps? He spends most of his time there now!"There was no time to question. Zelda thanked Tula for her help, wished her well, and pulled out the Sheikah Slate to continue on.She materialised on Vah Ruta's travel gate to see the broad vista of the Eastern Reservoir before her, its waters so still they seemed like glass. Two Zora, sitting with their legs over the precipice of the platform, immediately turned, springing to their feet to meet her."Zelda!" they called in unison, before she had the time to even recognise them. But when she did, Zelda felt as though her heart might burst."Larella!" she cried, running forward to greet them. "Sidon!"The Ambassador caught her first, sweeping her into a tight embrace. Sidon's powerful arm around her shoulder came next, nearly squeezing the air out of her. Her cheeks ached from the breadth of her smile, and her laughter echoed out across the reservoir, skipping clean across the still waters."What are you doing here?!" Zelda finally managed, taking the Ambassador's hands into her own. "I thought you were at the Castle!""I was - oh I was," Larella exhaled, a flash of regret on her face. "But Link! He freed me!"Hearing his name almost knocked the air from her once more. "Link is alive?"Larella was positively beaming, the happiest Zelda had ever seen her. "Yes! Oh yes! You should have seen him. You should have seen what he's done! Oh, but I cannot spoil it for you. Just know that he is alive and well, at the Castle still, and that he is stronger than he has ever been!"The news almost broke her. She brought her hands to her face, unable to stop the stream of joyous tears. You're alive! We're both alive! The Zora could do nothing but watch as she puddled to the ground, unable to speak from the rapturous glee. "Larella," Zelda beamed up at the Ambassador. "Thank you...thank you so much…"Sidon and Larella knelt by her side as she regained herself. She murmured her apologies and wiped away her tears. "King Sidon-" Zelda eventually said."No…." he cut her off, his shining eyes drooping low. "I am not the King."Another shock, but quickly explained. The Zora recounted the unfortunate business with Muzu and the Council to take over a ‘regents’ in Sidon’s place, and how they were working to overturn the decision.“While we work, Muzu wages war with the Gerudo! You must go there at once!” Larella lamented."I will, if you help me," Zelda said. "The Rito and I are planning an assault on the Castle. If we uproot Cinelgen, we can end the conflict with the Gerudo and restore your throne."Sidon and Larella pondered her words for a long moment, and Zelda steeled herself for their rejection. But then, after seeking silent approval from Larella, Sidon clapped his hands together and said with a toothy grin, "Of course! Anything to help Link. I still have friends here, and Larella has been trying to gather support for me. I will bring as many warriors as I can."Zelda breathed an inward sigh of relief and held out a hand to the Prince. "Meet me at the Sacred Grounds. No later than two weeks from today.""With pleasure, my lady," Sidon said, and shook her hand with vigour.One down. No time to waste. Zelda reached for her Sheikah Slate once more, now with the desert in her sights.If Zora's Domain was a shock to the senses, then the Gerudo Desert was nothing short of an onslaught.The ferocious heat hit her in a wave as she materialised at Daqo Chisay Shrine outside the walls of Gerudo town, the sun above and searing sands before her near blinding. As with the Korok Forest, winter did not come for Gerudo, it seemed, and her Rito coat was useless here. Taking a moment to stow it within the Sheikah Slate, Zelda made for the gates of Gerudo Town."No entry," barked the two guardswomen, crossing their spears in front of the archway that lead into town.Just as Kass hard warned; Gerudo Town was closed. And while the Domain had a Shrine within its walls, this place did not. Zelda stood straighter, and recited the words as she had practiced them, "My name is Zelda. I need to speak with Lady Riju. She will know my name."The guardswomen glared at her from underneath their veils, statuesque and unmoving. "Your identity does not matter," one said. "No one enters or leaves who is not Gerudo. Including vai."Zelda struggled to maintain her composure. "Please, I am a friend of the Chief.""The Chief is not here," the woman countered. She stepped forward, and placed a firm hand at Zelda's shoulder, shoving her backwards. "You will leave!""Where is Riju, then?" Zelda demanded, wrenching herself from the guardswoman's grip. "I only wish to speak to her!"She felt the woman's indignation, even under the heat. "Begone, vai. Before we drag you from this desert!"Zelda reigned in her anger, recognising then the paranoia that pervaded these guardswomen. The guard gave her another shove, "Go!""Enough, Mira!" came the call from behind, and both of the guardswomen stood to attention in an instant. And emerging from within the city walls, now dressed in the full regalia of a Royal bodyguard, Buliara stepped out into the sun. "Princess," she said, bowing her head. "What a surprise.""Buliara," Zelda returned the gesture. "Where is Riju?"The bodyguard sighed, and cast her gaze across the harsh sands, crows feet gripping the corners of her eyes as she surveyed the desert with a scowl. "It will be easier to show you."Over an unassuming canyon, under the shadow of the Great Plateau, where Gerudo ended and Hyrule began, was glory of the Geldarm Bridge. But now, it was the where the war had come, and Zelda decided, where it must end.After a precarious ride through the desert by sand seal, and half a day's walk through the Gerudo Canyon, Buliara led Zelda down to the front lines of the Gerudo defense at the Geldarm Bridge. The Zora camp was enormous, perhaps fifty strong, with a dozen manning the entrance to the bridge and the rest either guarding its flank, or having pressed onto the crossing itself. They had settled in for the winter, their camp tucked in close, with fires burning around every corner.The Gerudo side was only half a large, but they manned their side of the bridge as best they could. Guardswomen came and went, carrying weapons and crates, full of supplies and provisions by the wagon. Riju herself was stood with her soldiers, her unbraided hair shifting under the breeze, snowflakes falling on her crown like icing dust. She was taller now too, almost as tall as Zelda, and her face had grown hard. Duty had robbed her of her youth, but not her courtesies. She bowed low as Zelda approached."Princess," she said. "We saw your efforts in the west with Vah Medoh. It is good that you return. Is Link with you?""No. That is why I am here." Zelda answered. She turned to look across the bridge. "How long has this been going on?""They have been here for almost three months," Buliara explained."Every day they inch closer," Riju added. "They demand my head. What I would do to give them Cinelgen’s instead.""Then come with me. Help me fight him," Patiently, Zelda began to explain the situation; where Link was, her plan with the Rito, how she already had the support of Sidon and Larella, and how she now believed that this siege was not Sidon's work.Riju frowned at the mention of the aquatic race. "I would rather not work with Zora, but if it means destroying Cinelgen, and if you trust Sidon…""I do."The Gerudo Chief cast her bodyguard a questioning glance. Buliara nodded, and Riju exhaled, the decision made, "Then...we are by your side. We cannot spare many. Tell us where to meet you, and we will be there."Two down. Zelda sealed the alliance with another handshake, and turned once more to her Sheikah Slate. On the map, she found the Shrine by the Flight Range, thinking of the first time she had arrived there. She had arrived alone, with no allies, lost and afraid. And now Hyrule was at her back, just like the Sword. You won't believe it's me, Zelda decided. You won't even recognise me.***Time had taken the splendour and beauty of Hyrule Castle Gardens and turned it into little more than a barren waste. Link only knew it had been here from instinct, from the pieces of memory that he could muster. It was tucked away on the northern slope of the Castle, near the Royal Apartments, where it would sit in the sun all day long. Once, it had been shielded from the weather by a border of high hedges and stone. Now the stone walls were ruined, and the hedges - like the rest of the garden - were dead, and the empty courtyard was battered by the rough winds that blew off of the Hylia River.Inglis and Aurelia had begrudgingly brought Link to this desolate place, and they paced the length of the garden together, their voices barely any louder than the winds as they chatted amongst themselves.Link closed his eyes and tried to focus. Tried to latch on to the long spines of memory that he felt tingling against his neck. A red rose. A crying Princess. He could feel her with the Sword. He could hear her voice. Just promise you won't forget me - or us. But I can't read your mind, can I?It didn't make sense. The words didn't fit together, they were discordant, competing. If anything it was almost as if there were...two voices.Link's eyes snapped open. Two voices. The wind changed direction, whipping his hair about his face. He was so close. It was almost there. Two voices. Two Princesses.A cry from across the courtyard broke his concentration."Link!" Inglis was waving him over. "Come look at this."Resigning, Link jogged over to where his friends stood, both gaping up at something tucked amongst the dead shrubbery. When he saw what they had found, his mouth fell open.There it was. Somehow still alive. Or perhaps born anew. A single, red rose, clinging to life, isolated from the rest of the dying bush. Crimson as blood, starkly beautiful - a shock of colour in this dead place.Link closed his eyes as the memory come back in full.
Far from the bustle and pomp of Hyrule Castle’s courts and halls and vaulting ceilings, hidden so that only those who knew how to find it could, was a garden. It was lovingly cared for, but so little known that it was one of the few places of refuge within the enormous fortress.
Here, in high summer, the flowers of the garden bloomed fierce, every one of Hyrule’s flora collected here. Except the silent princess, Link recalled Zelda telling him a few weeks ago. Those were only out there, in the rolling wilds.
The centre of the garden was home to a spiral of rose bushes, and during his first visit to the gardens, Link spotted one that seemed different from the others. Rising out of the rose bush was a single, thornless red flower, surrounded by petals of white and yellow. Link held his hand up to it, gently running his fingertips over the petals. Why didn’t it have thorns? he wondered, distracting his mind from the sorrow that the crimson hue brought him.
Zelda gave him the answer, though she did not know it. "So much work goes into these flowers," she sighed. "They would die if left alone. It's a little sad, really."
Ah, the answer. She always had answers. This rose is dying. Time had gotten to it, softened it.
Time has softened the Princess too, Link thought as he caught the sight of Zelda in his periphery – a burst of sullen blues and gold in her royal regalia, pondering a cluster of blue nightshade. A few weeks ago it seemed that she wanted nothing but the absence of her Appointed Knight, but over time her disdain faded. They had begun to talk. He had begun to share parts of himself with her, and her the same.
Today she had requested that Link escort her around the grounds of the Castle. Somehow they had ended up in the gardens, watching idly as the flowers bloomed. Link could not complain; he liked the Princess's company. He liked listening to her talk. He liked the sweetness in her voice, and the soft sway of her hair and…
He didn't let his mind wander further. He wasn't allowed to feel anything for the Princess. Not this one, at least. No more than he would feel for a rose in the garden; something to admire, but not something to ever truly know. And he shouldn't…not after…
His mouth betrayed him. "Do you like the garden?" he asked, wanting to hear her voice.
"Not really," the Princess admitted, drawing herself away from the nightshade and moving to his side. "What about you?"
It’s nice. Little too nice."
Her lips curled into a smile, and she laughed: a small victory. "It’s a garden, of course it’s nice."
Link scratched the back of his head. “So we just stand here? Looking at the flowers?”
Zelda frowned softly. At his side, Link could feel the back of her hand grazing his. He chanced a look in her direction. Had she noticed?
"This mustn't be very interesting for you," she said. "I should apologise for dragging you here."
"I don’t mind." He meant it. Really meant it, he realised.
"You called it a burden. When you spoke of being chosen…"
"No," Link blurted out, stunned by his defiance. It wasn’t, anymore. She had become the only thing that did not burden him, he’d found.
Their eyes met – a silent standoff. Zelda smiled, and around them the sky seemed a little brighter, but Link could not return her radiance. His guts churned. This wasn't right. He shouldn't be here. He shouldn't like this as much as he did. He turned away, feigning the need to keep watch.
"I'm sorry. You can talk to me," Zelda said. "It helped you know, when you told me how you felt about...your appointment. I didn't feel so alone anymore." She was at his side then, a hand on his arm. "But...I can't read your mind, can I? If anything troubles you, if there's anything you're thinking about. I know what it’s like, to live with so much fear, you feel that it’s going to destroy you--"
"I ended things," Link said suddenly. "I told her I wanted to wait until...this was all over."
Zelda sprang away from him, her hand lifting from his arm, and where she had touched him he felt his skin burn. "Mipha?”
Link nodded, grimacing.
“Why?" Zelda whispered.
"Because… what if…” he could barely speak.
“What if we fail?” Zelda said; all he could do was again nod. He kept his gaze fixed on the Gardens entrance, as if anything could threaten them there.
When he turned back to the Princess, she was crying, her tears rolling down her cheeks, and finding the cobblestones below.
"So much chaos, so much pain!" she whispered. "All because of this stupid Calamity Ganon, that no one even knows truly exists!"
Link opened his mouth to speak, to apologise again, but a voice rang out behind him, high and sweet - the shrill voice of the Royal bard, the Sheikah named Lexo. Link grumbled - he was not overly fond of the bard. But Lexo would sing a song for her, he knew. He would cheer her, in ways that Link could not.
He fell in at Zelda's side as the Princess hurriedly wiped away her tears and turned to meet the Sheikah.
The faces of his Hylian companions greeted him when he came to."You okay? You just kind of...went away, for a bit there." Inglis had a hand at his shoulder, shaking him gently from the reverie, while Aurelia regarded him with silent concern."I remember," Link said breathlessly, opening his eyes. "I remember!"The two Hylians exchanged a confused look. "I don't understand," Inglis said.Link's hand went to his mouth as he remembered the rest. "I ended things. Before the Calamity. Hylia help me, why would I do that?""What are you talking about?"Aurelia urged.He'd been right. There were two voices. Two memories. The second one came in pulses."We were sitting at Vah Ruta," Link began to recount to them. "I couldn't separate the second memory out because I'd been there so many times. All those afternoons when Mipha healed me. That was was the last."Sitting atop Vah Ruta. Together on the elephant colossus' trunk. The afternoon ending. He had caught Mipha by the arm and said, Before you go, I've been thinking...perhaps this can’t work, right now. You and I. He felt as though he could be floating, or falling, the horror thrumming through his veins. "I was confused," he muttered. "Because of Zelda…I cared about her and I was confused…so I…"Mipha's voice rang in his ears, the memory unrelenting. Poised and restrained, as always. But now with sorrow intertwined in with the grace. I understand, your duty precludes your free will, at least until this is done. She had said it like a farewell. You needn't keep anything from me. You'll do good by the Princess, I know you will. Just promise not to forget me, or us, Link. The Domain will always be your home.Inglis shook him again. "What are you talking about?""I called it off, Inglis! I ended it with her!" Link cried. The question he'd been asking himself for months; what did he do, that the Zora Princess would not leave him be? Well know he knew."Who’s her? Called what off?""Her name was Mipha. She was my oldest friend and we were trying it out, being together, and I…" the words came out as a sob. "I broke her heart. All because I was confused, and maybe a little but in love, I don’t know. We were all so confused, the Champions, Zelda, all of us. That can't happen again!" He was frantic then, gripping Inglis' arms and shaking him in return. "Not this time!""Okay, okay, old man!" Aurelia pried them apart, her stern voice diffusing Link's hysteria. "We have a plan, remember? We can start whenever you're ready. None of us here, now, in the present, are confused about a thing!"Link relinquished his grip on Inglis. Aurelia was right. One hundred years ago he had made a mistake – a stupid, ridiculous mistake. But that time was gone. He was here, alive, right now. And Zelda was waiting.He knew what to do. He turned from the garden, leaving this part of his past behind, "I just have one last place I need to go," Link said, and made for the Royal Apartments.The study was just as he had left it. Crumbling, like the rest of the Castle, and a glowing Silent Princess arising out of the rubble.He had told Inglis that there could be notes here that would help with installing Rhoamet's diamond, but it had been a lie. He simply wanted to see Zelda's study before their work truly began.Link knelt beside the glowing flower, cradling the petals in his fingers. Zelda had once told him these flowers only survive in the wild, and this was was particularly strong, thriving amongst corruption and decay."Hey there, Zel," he said to it. "How are you going? You doing okay? What'd I once tell you? I'm okay if you're okay."Link sat down against the wall where the flower was blooming. He rested his heads against the bricks, feeling light-headed from the memories that swam in his mind. His shoulder was throbbing; it had never fully healed after all."I dunno if that's true," he went on, eyes fixed on the flower. "You could be just fine and I'd still be here without you."He wanted to pluck the flower then. Make it his. But that's how you kill it."You probably won't recognise me when you see me. You'll think I'm someone else," And then, a little petulantly. "But you already do, don't you? Well I'm sorry I'm not him. I know you loved him, and I know you wanted him to love you. I know it was him you wanted to kiss by the river. But he died along with the rest of Hyrule."The flower gave nothing back but a diffuse glow."But I remembered something. In the Garden. One thing that never changed. I've always cared about you. And I wonder if I had said something, all those years ago, would you have figured out your power earlier? I don’t know. I do know that since I woke up, all I ever wanted was you. I didn't even know you. I just knew you mattered. And I was so afraid of you those first months after we defeated Ganon, you know that? Terrified of you. And so confused. Oh, and I remembered what happened with Mipha. That was so stupid of me. You should have told me how much of an idiot I was, to hurt someone like that, and all because I was afraid. I can almost hear your voice, I can hear you beside me…"He was weeping then, though he did not know it. He couldn't say the rest out loud, only think and feel it.
I miss you. Every single thing about you.
Link raised a hand to his shoulder, and for the first time in months, felt the power flow. Under the glow of the Silent Princess, with the gift of the Princess he had scorned, his shoulder was soon healed in full."I gotta go. Rhoamet doesn't like being left alone," Link ran his fingers across the petals one last time and got to his feet. "I'll see you soon, Zelda. I know I will."***The thaw had come at last. The snow clouds broke, and the tepid light of the gathering spring finally shone upon Hyrule. Zelda wore her Rito coat still, not content to part with it now, along with the Master Sword at her back, and the Rito paraglider at her belt.She listed off the facts like reciting a poem. Sidon and Riju would meet them with their retinue at the Sacred Grounds. Teba would take the Rito in Vah Medoh. Zelda would teleport into Central Hyrule with the Shiekah Slate.And adding to their growing army was the most unexpected of additions; a party of Gorons, outfitted for war, led by a youth wearing a Champion's scarf and introducing himself meekly as Yunobo. They had arrived a few days after she returned to Lake Totori - barely more than half a dozen, but all brandishing enormous claymores and thumping their chests enthusiastically at the mention the brawl that would be the assault on Hyrule Castle."Link sent you?" Zelda confirmed with Yunobo, confused as to how he could have reached Eldin.Yunobo nodded, "The boss wants nothing to do with this fighting, but…I couldn't just do nothing! Link needs our help! I brought some friends, as many as I could. I'm sorry it isn't much, but we will do our best!" He crossed a fist at his heart, and his Goron brothers repeated the gesture.Zora. Rito. Gerudo. Gorons. All of Hyrule was ready to fight.Saki had returned not long after. Her own mission had been a success, much to Teba's relief. And scouts soon spotted the party to the east. Cinelgen, and the Yiga woman named Milagre, and half a dozen of the bandits in their neckerchiefs, travelling on horse towards Hebra."If we move now, we could beat him back to the Castle," Teba surmised."Take it right out from underneath him," Zelda agreed. She grinned hungrily. "Just like he did to me."As with so many times before, they stood together on Revali's Landing, Hyrule Castle shimmering in the far distance. It was happening, she realised. They had everything they needed. I hope you're ready, Cinelgen, she thought as she gazed across Hyrule, gripping the railing so hard that she began to shake."Hold nothing back, Teba," she told the Rito warrior beside her. "I want there to be nothing of him left."And in her conviction, in her fury, she did not see; the way Teba trembled, and the apprehension in his voice. "Of course," he said.Zelda gave the Castle one last look, and took one last deep breath to steel herself. "Time to go home," she said.
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
Part Four: Ascension
The scout's face is a stony grey and his lips are almost as blue as the fabric around his neck. He froze to death, someone suggests. He ran out of food, says another. Wishful words; the truth is soaking his tunic just above his gut. An arrow juts from his chest, snapped to try to hide the attack.
The Gerudo Chief glares down at his underlings and they scatter like ants under a boot; he's been murdered, he barks. The Yiga Secretary looks on in silence, grey eyes gleaming out from between bark-brown locks.
At the edge of Hebra, where the tundra has permanence, where the snow is always falling somewhere, is where the murdered man lays. His eyes are open; one of his former compatriots closes them. A fallen brother. One less Successor.
And then they all see that there are feathers at his feet. Scattered by the wind but clinging to the mud on his boots. The assailant was Rito, they realise. It was an ambush. The Rito of Hebra are not waiting to welcome them, after all. Their informant lied.
The Chief and the Secretary exchange a glance as heavy as granite. The realisation sinks between them. They've been caught by a trap so simple they didn't even see it, and have been drawn away from the Castle that was their ticket to rule all of Hyrule. But now, it may be lost, and struggling to maintain composure, twitching against the panic, the pair mouth two words in unison.
Oh, fuck.
The air in the Hyrule Castle Docks was warm and brackish, as beyond, dawn began to encroach on the starless sky. Aurelia with her white-gold hair and off-white bandages stood on the edge of one of the rotting jetties, silhouetted by the dawn break, cutting a lean and lithe figure that betrayed no hint of doubt or apprehension. Stance a little wide. Hands tense. Ready to move, to act. She could have been a Knight, Link thought.But now she was leaving. Link caught the disappointment on Inglis' face when the time finally came, and realised that it was mirrored on his own. Aurelia of Karusa Valley laughed loud and drank hard, and was a burst of brightness and wit against the decay of Hyrule Castle. The lingering awkwardness between them had disappeared with her right eye, as had her allegiance to Cinelgen. For the past two days she had helped Link and Inglis coax Rhoamet out of his catatonic state following the incident with Cinelgen, softly cooing, it's okay, Rhoamet, Link is here, and Inglis, and me, we're your friends. By sunset of the second day the Guardian had finally crept out of the shadowed corner within that Gatehouse where it hid.It was all the talk of escape that did it, Aurelia had explained, and the ochre brown of the dusk sky that made her think of home. It had made her ask the question that she was surprised hadn't occurred to her earlier: why stay?About two dozen Yiga agreed to accompany her on her flight from Hyrule Castle - her younger sister Hana included. They had crowded in a tiny paddle boat, only two oars between them, their hoods drawn around their unmasked, youthful faces. They were not bladed ones; just acolytes and stewards, caught up in a war they didn't ask for and pining for home. With wide eyes, they watched as Link and Inglis bid Aurelia farewell."Waste no time," she advised, her remaining eye percussive in its insistence. "Go get your boy, fix his eye, and leave.""Where will you go now, Aury?" Link questioned, the rest unsaid: what will you do? Despite her plain clothes and humbled appearance, Link had not forgotten what Aurelia was. Without her armour, her wrists were bare, and tattooed in a fading red was the telltale inverted eye of the Yiga.Aurelia was quick to understand, and made no attempt to soften her words; "There are those among my people who still want to fight you, Link, no matter what Cinelgen thinks, and no matter that Ganon is dead."Link's tone was hopeful. "And what about you?"She hesitated, opening her mouth to speak only to sigh. Her companions behind her shifted with impatience."I lived a quiet life in Karusa, with my sisters. My sister Cassiah was bladed, but long ago she spoke of a new way,” Aurelia reached up to her face to scratch at her bandages uncomfortably. “I may not look it anymore, but I am Yiga, and I love my people. I want to find that new way my sister dreamed of. One of peace, where we aren’t afraid to live in the light. We’re not so bad, you know, once you get to know us. Fun even."Inglis burst into a laugh that reverberated off of the cavern walls. "You, fun?" he chortled.Aurelia shot him a withering look. "More fun than you," she gibbed, and his laughter quickly faded."Anyway, um," he muttered. "Safe travel."With a curt nod, Aurelia turned on a determined heel towards the paddle boat. Link bit down his own hesitation - the ruminating apprehension at the idea he had held in his head for a few days now.He caught a glimpse of rust coloured blood on her bandages and made his decision, reaching out to catch her by the shoulder. He owed her for getting Cinelgen out of the way. It wouldn't be right, to do nothing.Before Aurelia could protest, Link held a hand up to her face - to where the wrapped bandages were beginning to yellow. She jolted away from him, but Link held her shoulder firm. "What are you doing--"The soft blue light in his palm silenced her; Link closed his eyes as the wave of compassion washed over him, and the images of younger days, and happier times, flooded his senses. Inglis, and the other Yiga, watched with eyes of glass.When the healing was done, Aurelia yanked herself from his grip. "What was that?" she demanded.Link said nothing, but silently motioned for her to unwrap her bandages. Gingerly, hands shaking with uncertainty, Aurelia unravelled the cotton bandages, and touched her healed face in disbelief. Her eye was still missing, the eyelid hanging limply over the empty socket. But the gashes on her cheek and brow had closed, leaving clean, white scars."This is what our alliance could look like, Aury," Link said with a smile. And then, aware of the half dozen pairs of eyes staring at him in amazement, he added: "I hope you find the peace you are after."Aurelia's lip was trembling as though she might sob, but unexpectedly, she laughed, weak and cynical."Well, my mother always said I was too pretty," she wheezed, but her smile broke again when her fingers padded around the socket of the missing eye, and a single tear ran down her cheek."You look fine, Aury," Inglis assured her, giving her a solidary pat on the shoulder. For a moment, her lips twitched, betraying the relief that crossed her features. But then she recoiled."Stop smiling at me! Both of you!" she snapped, her scarred face reddening. She turned from them, all but running away from the friendship that had been extended to her. "Idiots," she cursed under her breath.The trio exchanged not another word as the Yiga paddled out from the docks. When they approached the mouth of the cavern, Aurelia turned and gave Link and Inglis one last, rueful glare, and the shortest of waves. Link didn't even have time to wave back; another moment later, and Aurelia was gone. He expected some snide remark from the Akkalan, but Inglis simply stared in silence, eyes hooded and mouth downturned, at the place where she had stood.The sun was up by the time Link and Inglis made it to the First Gatehouse, having retrieved the diamond from Cinelgen's study. The windows and archways of the Gatehouse were still boarded up, letting in only thin slivers of light; Link held the jewel up to one of the beams, and was pleased to see a concentrated ray landing in a pinpoint on the dirt.Fitting the diamond was not their only order of business. Before that could be done, Link wanted to inspect Rhoamet's damaged leg. The savage cut Cinna had made was not completely clean; twisted metal and ancient wiring hung loose from the severed limb. Eventually, with some patience and a lot of transcribed blinking, Link figured what was wrong. Damage, the automaton had repeated over and over.And so, armed with little more than a wrench, Robbie's bronze Sheikah goggles and his own will, Link had sought to alleviate some of that pain. He sent Rhoamet to sleep, coaxing him with promises of restoring his laser beam, and he and Inglis propped his enormous shell up against a wooden box that Inglis had brought in from the storage cellar."He's a big boy," Inglis grunted as they lifted lowered the shell against the crate. "Though smaller than some I remember in Akkala."Link walked carefully around the Guardian’s shell, examining him. "You’re right. Smaller by a half than the others I’ve fought, now that you mention it."But why? He put the thought out of his mind to focus on removing the rest of Rhoamet's damaged leg, the goggles proving invaluable as he navigated the Guardian's underbelly. They were even more novel than he had been expecting; the eye pieces moved, rotated and zoomed independently, allowing Link a dizzying range of vision at a detail that had him marvelling. When he'd first put them on, he spent almost an hour just gazing at the snaking contours and hidden valleys on the skin of his palms.The goggles would prove even more useful today however, when at last the time had come to fit the new diamond.Rhoamet sat with his remaining legs splayed out against the ground, his domed head cap unlatched and left on the ground beside his body. His beady eye was dark, and his shell pulsed with a dim cerulean hue. It reminded Link of his old Champions tunic; I wonder where that is. Still in the Sheikah Slate, perhaps?"Anything I can do?" Inglis called. He was inspecting the Gatehouse's main cast-iron doors. They had since been chained shut following Rhoamet's outburst the week prior. With the butt of his halberd, Inglis poked at the enormous lock, and the heavy chains tinkled as they shifted across the iron."Other than praying? No," Link answered, eyeing the iron doors. He climbed Rhoamet's shell with the diamond in hand, kneeling by the housing component that sat just behind the Guardian's eye.He honed in on the housing component. As with the underbelly, it was a weave of interlocking components that slid and shifted under the slightest touch when Link attempted to adjust them. And beneath that, another network of gears and levers and locks whirred lazily, keeping Rhoamet ticking along in idle - the belly of the beast. It seemed unfathomable that amongst all the ancient metal and parts, there was something resembling a being in there; but Link was convinced now that perhaps Rhoamet had at least a mimicry of a soul.Focusing on the interlock, Link lowered the diamond into the clasps that would hold it in place, adjusting the gears ever so slightly, fingers lightening their grip, but not too fast, just enough so that it would…Click. The clasps snapped into place, and as innate and organic as the heart in Link's chest, the diamond sat snug in the interlock. Cautiously, afraid that any lax movement would ruin his work, Link called for Inglis to help him reposition Rhoamet's domed headcap back onto his body."Time to wake him up?" Inglis asked.Link nodded, excited at the prospect, but the chance would never come.The air suddenly shook. A long, brassy horn blast boomed across the Castle. In an instant, Inglis raced over to the side entrance of the Gatehouse. He threw open the heavy wooden door, and a blinding light streamed in through the archway. "Hylia help us," he said fearfully. "He's back."Link scurried over to where Inglis stood, squinting as he peered down along the Western Passage towards the enormous gates of Hyrule Castle. And sure enough, there he was - on his sand coloured mount, flanked by his party of bandits, Cinelgen rode through the Gates with menacing purpose. He stopped to dismount, handing his mount to a nearby Stablehand. Behind, Milagre and the rest of the party trotted through the gates as another horn blast cut through the air.Link and Inglis turned to each other in a panic. "You said he'd be gone a whole week," Link said incredulously. "It's been two days!""Something must have happened," Inglis determined. "Maybe he figured out the lie," His eyes were seeking, clouded by confusion. "Why do you think the Rito told him that? To catch him in the wild?"Link looked to the west, to where Vah Medoh flew above the mountains of Hebra. It had not landed since its cleansing, tracing low circles around the rock spire of Lake Totori. As though mobilised for battle.He shook his head at Inglis' suggestion. "Not to catch him. To cut him off. They're coming here, Inglis."The Akkalan boy stared westwards in shock, and a third and final horn blast rang out."Three blasts," he said. "A call to action." Their suspicions were confirmed. Below, Cinelgen was riding along the Western Passage towards the Gatehouse. Inglis' face hardened, and he tensed."He'll want Rhoamet, if there's to be fighting." He stepped through the threshold, his gaze locked on the Gerudo. "Link, you need to go, now.""W-what?" Link stammered. "What about you?" He followed Inglis through the door."I'll delay Cinna," Inglis answered. There was a strength in his voice Link hadn't heard before; silhouetted by the morning light, Inglis seemed taller. "I'll give you time to wake Rhoamet and escape.""No." Not without you. Link reached out, pleading, pulling him back by the arm. "Inglis-"The Akkalan wrenched himself free. "It's fine," he said, turning back to give him a sad smile. "Let me be the hero for once, Link."Link reeled, strung up by a sudden indecisiveness. They had been so close. The promise had almost been kept, Inglis had almost been free. He was speechless, unable to move, until Inglis stepped forward and seized him by the back of the head, pressing his forehead against Link's, brown eyes meeting blue."I'll see you soon," he assured him. "Just get yourself out of here, okay?"Link nodded, bolstered. No time, and no choice. Inglis' selflessness had taken the decision from him."I'll see you soon," he affirmed, and with a quick, brotherly embrace the pair parted; Inglis down the Western Passage, and Link back to his Guardian.Fighting the shiver of his nerves, Link tapped Rhoamet's shell and, slowly, the colours on his shell intensifying, Rhoamet arose."Diagnostic?"A thin red beam appeared from the Guardian's eye, the familiar beeping sending a shock through Link's spine. Rhoamet focused on the cast iron doors of the Gatehouse, the crimson laser honing in on where the chains held the door closed. He looked back down to Link;
TB OK
"Good, good," Link said, balling his fists to keep them from shaking. His mind was racing, clambering for the scraps of his escape plan that he had figured out the evening prior. Holding his face still to mask his fear, he looked back up to his Guardian."Alright, buddy, I think we're ready. We're not going out through the front. Too dangerous. But I've got my powers back, I just need you to go where I say." Link looked into Rhoamet's quiet eye, a hand to the back of his neck. "Do you trust me?"After a pause, Rhoamet spelt out the answer;
Today.
Link smiled, relieved. "Today," he nodded and he climbed onto Rhoamet's shell, gripping one of the handles atop his head. Once he had settled into position, he reached down to tap the side of the Guardian's head and pointed towards the cast-iron doors. The red honing beam appeared again, locking onto the chains, and Link found that his once visceral reaction of terror was replaced by a thrill."No need to be afraid," he said, to both himself and his Guardian. "They captured you for what you can do. For your power."Shouts had erupted from the Castle Gates, and then, a swan song for this chapter in his life, an otherworldly screech of a divine bird sounded across Hyrule. Link's smile broadened, the fear gone.He tightened his grip. "C'mon, then. Let's give them what they want."From the gates of Hyrule Castle, Inglis of Akkala watched the commotion unfold with a mask of solemnity, hiding the excitement underneath. He had been feigning concern over dilapidated camps in the Castle Town ruins, trying to distract Cinelgen and Milagre from entering the Gatehouse, when an arc of light emerged from the trees surrounding the Sacred Grounds. The Princess.Next was the call of the Divine Beast, high and strident, signalling Vah Medoh's advance from the mountains of Hebra. Inglis could feel the beat of propellers in his chest. And then - as Cinelgen's bandits scrambled - a beam of energy blasted down the doors of the First Gatehouse, sending a shower of broken metal and debris into the courtyard beyond. From the plume of dust that followed, Link and Rhoamet emerged, unhindered; boy and beast on their final flight at last.Inglis almost cheered, his blood suddenly abuzz, as beside him Cinelgen cried out with a mixture of rage and terror, kicking his sand-speckled mount into a gallop down the Western Passage. Milagre moved to follow, but Inglis pulled himself up onto her saddle, giving the reigns a cracking whip. He didn't turn, didn't apologise for the intrusion, and together they sped along the passage after Cinelgen.The Successors that had not fled converged on Link and Rhoamet in the courtyard between the twin Gatehouses. They blocked both paths where the courtyard split - the left leading to the second Gatehouse, and the right a small alley path down to the Dining Hall.A few brave ones leapt onto the Guardian's shell, recklessly attempting to secure it, only to be knocked back by a gale that erupted from between Link's hands. And any that came at him with spears or arrows were rebuffed by a glowing, angular sphere of orange light that appeared around the Knight. Link’s powers, Inglis realised, watching with a subdued glee. The Guardian reeled and spun, his Knight riding atop his head, knocking back assailant after assailant, his blonde hair whipping about his face in the wind and his blue eyes caught fire. Inglis saw, and he knew; this is what he was born for."What are you doing?" Cinelgen bellowed, watching the chaos from the first Gatehouse. "Stop them!" He whipped his horse again, bearing down on the Guardian, but with almost casual ease, Link turned and snapped his fingers, raining a barrage of lightning down around the Gerudo and his mount, the thunder so loud that Inglis felt the air around him crackle. Cinna's horse reared, throwing the Gerudo to the ground.Wasting no time, Link and Rhoamet powered towards the alley path, a bursting beam of energy scattering any who stood in their way.Inglis kicked the horse forward, keeping up if only to bear witness. Behind him, Cinelgen had remounted his horse in fleet footed pursuit. Undeterred by his pursuers, Link pointed forwards as Rhoamet neared the outpost at the edge of island, where the Castle kissed the mainland and the moat was narrow. Compliant, remaining legs frantic, Rhoamet scaled the aging brick outpost with fervour. His domed head whirred and locked, passing a final look at the Castle, and his captors, until Link gave the order to move. Let's go, buddy, Inglis heard him say, and at lat he allowed himself at last to smile.The Successors could not catch them. Even Cinelgen had slowed. Link’s shimmering sphere of protection grew to encompass the entire Guardian itself, and another gale of rushing air launched Link and Rhoamet from the parapets. Inglis' smile became a roaring laugh. It didn't matter who heard, or who saw; the Akkalan watched and laughed as, victorious and free at last, Link and Rhoamet flew.Bronze light all around; a protection. Fearsome pink lights below; a Guardian. Link could not fight the urge to scream as he and Rhoamet plunged down from Hyrule Castle. His nails scraped automaton's ancient stone, fighting for grip, for focus, the rush of the fall threatening to take both as the cold waters below sat ready for a battering embrace.The world lurched, the bronze shield shattering, and pain tore through Link's skull in a splintering burst. He felt his bones crunch, and saw the blue of the sky, a flash of pink and five splayed out legs - a luminous shell bouncing and rolling behind him, and then tasted dirt as his vision went black.Dirt, he realised. Dirt! They had landed on solid ground!Link pulled himself to his feet, and was met with the banks of the far side of the Hyrule Castle Moat. One of the towering Sheikah Pillars pulsed beside him, spiking back towards the Castle. And on Link's other side, seeming somewhat dazed, Rhoamet had recovered, padding shakily along the slippery grass. But he was not hurt. The Guardian was intact.There was nothing to do but cheer. Thirty feet of still waters, a mountain of rock and a ring of high wallsnow separated Link from Hyrule Castle. He had escaped; Rhoamet had escaped. He leapt onto the Guardian's shell and wrapped his hands around its head, laughing as Rhoamet stumbled backwards beneath him.Before them lay the ruins of the Hyrule Cathedral, with the camp at Castle Town nestled below the noll just beyond. Up above, watching from the parapets, the remainder of Cinelgen's bandits gazed down with angry, disbelieving eyes. Even Cinelgen was among them, face blackened with rage, Inglis and Milagre patiently at his side. Link blew them a kiss, gloating. But the celebration was short lived; Cinelgen was shouting for someone to chase after them. Good luck with that. Link and his Guardian disappeared into the rolling hills and steppes, crossing over to Crenal Peak.They sped along the muddy ground together as a light rain began to drizzle around them, towards a small forest of trees that were budding with the first flowers of spring. Behind them, the Divine Beast of the Rito was nearing the Castle, soon circling the fortress in an almost lazy paced holding pattern.It would start soon, he knew. The Rito would attack. Link wanted to be there. Whether it be a siege or an assault, he flexed his sword hand and felt the need return. The hunger that had been lost to him these past months, taken by a fever, returned by Cinelgen's cruelty and the memory of a Princess.Link gave himself a once over; he was uninjured, if a little muddy, but he had no gear and no weapons save his hobbled together clothes and Robbie's mechanical goggles. Inglis was meant to equip him with a sword before their escape, but Cinelgen's return had left no time for that. Rhoamet sat huddled amongst the trees, patient as always. He had one weapon, Link decided. But he would not risk exposing Rhoamet to more fighting. You're just too big of a target, and I can't always protect you, he concluded, casting a long gaze towards the Castle Town ruins.A small camp lay there, he remembered, sifting through his mental catalogue. They had passed it on their way to and from Eldin; no more than a dozen bandits living amongst the ruin to act as watchers. Had they sounded the alarm? It didn't matter; they would have weapons. He told Rhoamet to power down, to wake himself for no one but Link, and set off for Castle Town. When he looked back, his Guardian had become part of the landscape, indistinguishable from the decayed and dead automatons dotted throughout the fields.The drizzle was persistent, quickly soaking through Link's meagre clothes and softening the ground beneath his feet. A good omen. The wetted ground would mask his footsteps. Link moved with purposeful gait, eyes tunneled on the camp ahead, every sense alert as he listened for movement, for noises, for chatter and orders in the rain.He stalked along the western outskirts of town ruins, spying a huddle of wind-battered lean-tos, counting the dozen Successors that he had expected. Mostly Hylian, some Gerudo, some Rito. He pressed further inwards, keeping close to what remained of the walls, watching and listening to the scurrying of the bandits through the camp as they attempted to ready themselves for the attack. In an empty tent he found a sturdy wooden shield, its face marked and dented. Not quite his Hylian Shield, but it would do. To his disappointment, there was nothing else to find.Collapsed houses, puddles and spikes of gurgling Malice and the crumbling remains of the town passed by until Link was not far from the centre. Peering across the camp, Link spied the Sacred Grounds, shielded by heavy evergreens. He caught a rustle, a movement, and squinted at a shift in colour - or perhaps the absence of it. Something white. Link reached for the goggles and pulled them down over his eyes, and had to bite it his lip to keep from crying out.Aimed square in his direction, cold and unfeeling in intent, was an arrow nocked into the bow of a white Rito warrior. Beside him stood a broad-shouldered green-feather, and another, smaller blue-feather. They held their bows all raised, hidden by the shrubbery of the Sacred Grounds. An ambush. Wait! I know you, Link almost cried, but a shout came from his left flank - a bandit, burly and well-built.“What’re you doing here? Aren’t you the Champion!?” the man barked.Link flinched backwards, and moved just in time to catch the white Rito's arrow with the sturdy wood of his shield. A cacophony of hissing arrows soon followed, whistling through the ruins. Link tore the goggles from his face and turned towards the burly Hylian bandit."What's going on!?" the man shouted, "Who-" And then he disappeared, a barrelling blur knocking him to the ground, followed by another, and another; great rolling boulders that thundered through the ruins. No, not boulders, he realised, his mouth hung open in disbelief. Gorons!And then a flash of red sped past him, atop a well-armored mount; a Gerudo woman in bronze, wielding a shining claymore. With a clean swing she sent one of the Successors flying, crashing into the ruined water fountain. A duo of riders were at her flank, golden weapons raised, howling as they rode. On the other side of the ruins, a towering, crimson Zora warrior leapt into the fray, wielding a silver spear which he buried into the chest of a retaliating bandit. Another two Zora followed, their silver weapons and jewels catching the light as they moved.Above, the trio of Rito had taken to the sky; white, blue, and green, all with their bows angled towards the ruins. Link ducked under his shield again as a second hail of arrows hit, and the bandits went down.There was a cry behind him - another bandit, cut down by an golden arrow - Then there was the tremor of horse's hooves as a white mare tore along the path towards the gates of Hyrule Castle. Link spun around towards them, Don't!, on his lips, and he froze.The rider was a short-haired woman, in a navy coat with Rito pauldrons, a bow in hand and a sword at her back. She raised her right palm to the sky, staring down the bandits that watched from the walls of the Castle, a shining golden barrier unfolding from her hand as her shield against any attack.
Zelda.
Link wasn't sure if he had shouted it, or only imagined that he had. He could not move. She won't recognise me, she won't know me. He began to back away, the old doubts swarming him in a flurry that made his stomach churn. She doesn't need me.Familiar faces appeared around him as gradually, the attackers became aware of his presence. The white Rito landed beside the fountain, his yellow eyes wide and harsh, face drawn. And then the crimson Zora turned, his toothy grin fading into shock. The Gerudo atop their horses watched with steeled faces, betraying no reaction, and even the Gorons had seen. I know you, their faces said. If they spoke Link couldn't know. He was paralyzed; he was underwater; a thousand miles away from himself, unable to process what he saw. They were all here. All of Hyrule had come for the Castle.The Rito spoke first; the girl had not noticed their silence. Perhaps it was the rain. Perhaps this was a dream. Zelda, the Rito said, and Link shuddered at the name. He wasn't ready.But the girl turned. Her hand dropped. The ruins were forgotten, her horse abandoned, and she began to run."Link!" she shouted, sprinting across the crumbling path, rendered in gold, and blue, and every colour he could imagine, and as he ran towards her all he could think was, Yes, that's my name, that's who I am, and his doubts were gone.Zelda hit him like wave, breaking against his chest, so hard that he almost didn't catch her. They spun together, tangled in a clinging embrace, chest to chest and arm around arm. She was warm, so warm, and he trembled against her, the sound of his name in her voice the only thing he could hear. Against his palms he felt the thick wool of her coat. He buried his face in it, feeling the dew from the rain against his face. He was shaking, they both were, and he realised they were both laughing too. His cheeks ached. He tasted salt.Link felt her unravel herself from him, pulling away, and then there she was. Nose to nose, forehead to forehead, her face next to his. Hylia help me. She was so beautiful, so sudden - familiar and foreign, novel and known. He placed a hand at the back of her head, fingers pawing, searching."Your hair!" he cried.Zelda had done the same. "Your hair!" she laughed, a hand where his ponytail would have been.They were laughing again, on their knees, huddled together on the wetted ground. When did that happen? She had a hand to his face, thumbing away the water, resting against his cheek, warm fingers tracing the cuts and bruises. "You're hurt," she murmured."Just a little," Link chuckled. A corner of blue caught his eye and he looked down to see she was wearing his tunic, hidden amongst her warm coat and downy Rito armour. "You're… this is…" he was speechless.Her fingers traced over his ear, pushing the wet hair from his face. She whispered, "I needed it. Needed you with me," and Link all but broke.The relief was a flood, hitting him harder than any blow, shattering him into a dozen, dozen pieces. He seized her for support, bracketing her, holding her so tight that he couldn't see, only faintly aware of the staring faces around them. He didn't care. Zelda was here. She was wearing his tunic. She needed him. He tried to speak and all he said was her name. And she had her hand in his hair, soothing him, letting him fold into her, and the way she smelled of wet wool and old leather and earth and grass and rain."It's okay, it's okay," she was saying. "I've got you, I'm here. And so are you - you're alive and you're here." Her hands were on his face then, green eyes filling his vision. "We made it home."Introductions - or re-introductions - were made. A clean slate; the rain washed away the blood from the fight. Link made a mental note of Zelda's small force. He couldn't help it now. Always counting, always observing. He tallied them as they exchanged pleasantries, congratulations, joyful hugs - the new Champions, Link surmised.Sidon with his three Zora warriors burst forward, seizing Link in a crushing hug; "My friend!" he cried. "You live!"A familiar, pacifying voice then called for the Prince to let go, and Link was breathlessly reunited with Ambassador Larella. She was adorned in jewels once more, finer than he had ever seen her wear, the colour returned to her cheeks, her eyes. The Ambassador reported happily that Robbie and Granté had likely made it home safe."And where is Rhoamet?" she asked, but there was no time to reply, as Yunobo brought a solid hand across Link's back."Hey, Link!" the Goron smiled. "You're here! I'm sorry about what happened, on the mountain.""No hard feelings," Link assured him, and Yunobo laughed, clasping his belly, his whole body shaking. Because we're rocks, he told his brawlers, and a chuckle rumbled through the group.Buliara came next with her riders, and later Chief Riju, who had waited out the fighting at the edge of the town. The little Gerudo was almost his height now, her regal attire swapped out for riding pants and leather armour embroidered in golden flecks. Her nails were blackened, but she was not yet a warrior like her bodyguard, it seemed."Greetings, Link," she said with a smile. "Let's hope the fighting here is short, we've our own battles to fight in Gerudo."And then came Teba. He stood at Zelda's side, watching the reunions in silence. At last he simply nodded and said, "Good to see that you live," his eyes guarded, almost sceptical. He nodded in Zelda’s direction. “For her sake.”With Link caught up, Zelda stepped forward, unbuckling the Master Sword from her back. She held it out to him, silent hesitation written on her features, mouth downturned in a sorry frown.Link took the Sword firmly in hand. He strapped it over his shoulder, and smiled inwardly at the familiar weight. The pull of the buckles against his chest was a warm embrace; making him feel stronger, making him feel whole. Good to have you back, he thought, and he felt the reply,
And to you, Master.
All in all, he counted thirty fighters, including the Rito Warriors that apparently waited from within Vah Medoh. Not quite all of Hyrule. And outnumbered by Cinelgen's force two to one.The party plied him for an explanation, asking, why are you here? Link could have asked them the same thing, how being the more apt question. But he couldn't find the energy to answer. And in any case, there was only one person he wished to speak to, and one thing he wished to speak to her about.Zelda left Teba in charge of the group while Link lead her east towards the forest where he had left Rhoamet. They walked in silence, exchanging pleasantries and apprehensive observations;"That's a nice coat.""Thank you, it was a gift.""It suits you.""We’ll have to get you some better clothes.""Prisoners can't be choosers."And then silence. Three months apart, this moment played out in his head a hundred times, and no words to say. Zelda hadn't even asked where they were going - she simply followed, quiet and complacent, pressed in close by Link's side as he lead them through dewed grasses of Hyrule Field.At last they approached the trees, and Link held his arm out in front of her. "Promise me you won't do anything."She scrunched up her nose at him. "What do you mean do anything?""Just…" Link could not even begin to explain. "He's good. Like they used to be.""He…?" Zelda echoed, face blank with confusion. Link kept his arm in front of her, and turned towards the trees."HOIIIIII-!" he called. "WAAKE UP!"Zelda started backwards at his sudden shout. "What-?"Blue light flickered through the trees, and her face dropped. Dutifully, ready to serve, Rhoamet marched out from the copse, sitting himself down contentedly in front of them.Hello, he said, domed head rotating and juttering, back and forth as he looked between the two Hylians before him.Zelda was statuesque - eyes wide as saucers, her mouth open and round. "W-was that... was that Shiekah Code?" she whispered. "Did it just-"Link nodded, "Sure did." He walked over to Rhoamet, and said, "This is Zelda."Rhoamet lifted one of his legs in a short, stilted wave. Hello, he said again, spelling out her name. Z-E-L-D-AA strangled, whining sound escaped Zelda's lips. "How…?"Link turned back to Zelda with a wide grin on his face, hands on his hips, speaking as though he were a proud parent. "Cinelgen had me working on him. Figuring out how to control him. Robbie taught me the code, and even gave me his goggles." He gave Rhoamet's shell two genial taps. "I even convinced Cinna to take me to Eldin, to get a new diamond for him. Might be useful breaking into that Castle of yours.""And you… you tamed him?" Zelda asked. Mystified, she stepped towards the Guardian with a hand outstretched. Hello, Zelda, Rhoamet said again."I wouldn't say tamed. I befriended him," he told her as she placed a hand on Rhoamet's shell. "And… I named him Rhoamet."She snatched her hand away, and gave him a crestfallen look. Link stumbled over himself to apologise, but her lips twitched into a smile, leaving Link breathless as he waited for her to speak."This is amazing, Link," Zelda marvelled, her breath catching. She clasped her hands at her chest and beamed. "This is… a living Guardian! And… and he trusts you! He listens to you!”“Yeah,” Link said with a smile, feeling fears fall from his eyes. “He’s been a lifesaver.”“And you gained Cinelgen's confidence?"This was a less fond topic. "Only because he wanted to give it," Link said. "I couldn’t figure him out, but I know his people are splintering.""Any information you gathered on them is invaluable. I… I can't tell you how proud I am!"Link scratched the nape of his neck. "Yeah, well, it's nothing you couldn't have done.""No, definitely not," Zelda shook her head, her eyes never leaving Rhoamet. "This Guardian trusts you because you were kind to him. I'd have been… too analytical. Too focused. And I'd have never broken out of Hyrule Castle, that's for sure.""You?" Link laughed. He pointed to Vah Medoh, still flying low over Hyrule Castle. "You cleansed Vah Medoh, alone! I thought it needed us both!""It did. It does!" Zelda corrected him, rushing to his side to place an apologetic hand on his arm. "You are the Sword's Master, it should only answer to you. But I think it knew we had your blessing, somehow.""And your army? Was that all the Sword as well?""No, it wasn't," Zelda conceded. "But they came for you, Link.""And they followed you all the way here.”Zelda opened her mouth to reply, furrowed lines appearing on her brow, though still she smiled - she was unreadable, changed somehow. Was it something I said?Link bowed his head. "I'm sorry… I shouldn't argue–.""No!" Zelda blurted, her grip on his arm tightening. "Say anything you want. Argue, if you must."Perhaps this was a dream. He gaped down at her, trying to understand. "That's… that's what you want?""I don’t want to fight anymore. But I want you to be you," Zelda smiled, taking his hands into hers, her conviction wrenching in his chest. "If you can forgive how I treated you. I know I don’t deserve it."Link could not help but laugh; giddy, dizzy, the warmth of her hands like a hearthfire. "Don't deserve…? You raised an army to break me out of that Castle, as far as apologies go–""And you beat me to it!" Zelda beamed, gesturing towards Rhoamet. "This Guardian, befriending Cinna. I should have seen what you're capable of now. I should have understood..."The admission was easy, the words rolling hot off his tongue, frustration laced in between. "Well it was all for you. All of it," He gripped her hands tighter. "All the lies I told and all the things I did. All in the hope that I'd live long enough to see you again."A heavy silence fell. Zelda gazed up at him in shock, and Link wondered if he'd said too much. But he didn't care. She was here, her hands in his and finally he could speak words he’d waited a lifetime to say. "Maybe I am different, maybe I don’t always know who I am, but I know I never stopped wanting you," he told her. "I tried to forget you, for three months, tried to be me without you and it did not work–!"She kissed him.Hands on his face, the gentle prick of her nails scraping his jaw, she was kissing him, lips warm and solid and real against his. He had no time to be shocked, no time to pull away - but, Goddess, had he the choice, he never would. She had him, encapsulated, enraptured, and Link seized her around the waist to pull her closer as they fell into each other with everything they were, and had ever been."I'm sorry," she whispered between kisses. "What I said, at Hyrule Castle, I never should have…""It's okay, it's okay," he soothed, running his fingers through her hair."No." She murmured, breaking away, but he held tight, afraid she would slip through his fingers. "It was cruel. To compare you to-" Their lips met again; he breathed her words."I don't care," Link told her. "Be cruel." He kissed her again, and again, breaking away to find her cheek, her neck, salted skin on his lips and golden hair between his hands. "Just don't stop."She giggled, gasping, giving him one last, lingering kiss before untangling herself from him. "You're incorrigible.""You started it.""I did not. You did," Zelda poked him square in the chest, and he feigned great offense; shot through the heart, wounded. She ignored him. "In Lanayru. You kissed me.""And I've waited three months to kiss you again - come here!" He reached for her, but Zelda darted away from him, squealing as she tried to evade his needing arms. Soon enough he had her again, bundling her close. More kisses; he had to keep kissing her, to make up for those lost months, but it would never be enough. It was a flood now, threatening to break banks."Stop, stop!" Zelda laughed, squirming from his grip. "Link, we have Castle to take back. We can continue this after."He had a hand at her waist. "Is that a promi-ow!" She'd reached up to pinch his ear, ignoring his pouty whine."Shush. I take it you can still fight?"Recovering, Link brought a hand to the hilt of his sword. Well? He asked, but he needn't wait for the answer. The blade already felt warm in his grip. He met her eyes with a broad smile. "Is that even a question?"A cleared bench became their war table, the map drawn in chalk on the splintered wood. Hyrule Castle lay ready for taking, even with their meagre force. But the Castle was not the goal."Cinelgen is," Zelda explained to the envoy."And Milagre," Link added. "She controls his forces. Without her, he has nothing."He stood at her side, his Guardian waiting patiently behind him, and stood with arms crossed and features hard as he studied the map. As he spoke, Zelda feigned pensive intent, listening to his words as he explained Cinelgen's number and the state of the Castle. But her eyes lingered on his features, on his broad chest and muscled arms. She had given him his Hylian Soldier armour to wear and now couldn't help but stare, take ownership. Link caught her staring and his lips flickered into a smile."We're ready when you are," Teba said, pulling her from her daydream. "Unless there are other matters to attend to."He gave her a knowing look. Was it that obvious? Zelda blinked away her wandering thoughts and refocused on the expectant faces around her."We keep to our plans," she said. "The Rito will wait for our signal, as will the Zora. The Gorons and Gerudo will stay with myself and Link. Larella and Riju will stay with Rhoamet. The rest of you; take no risks and hold nothing back. I'd burn this Castle down if it meant capturing Cinelgen."Link shook his head. "No, we cannot be brash. There's too many of them, and we do nothing for your cause by killing more Hylians." His words cautious and measured, but commanding all the same, reminding her and everyone else at the table of the Knight he once was. Zelda took the advice in her stride; there was truth in his words, and it would not do to argue."As you say. We only engage if we absolutely must," Zelda affirmed. "We're a dagger, not a hammer. Make yourselves effective, despite any weakness."A murmur of agreement rolled through the envoy. Teba nodded; Sidon balled his hand into a fist, the Gorons thumped their chests and Buliara and Riju both bowed their heads.Zelda took a deep breath; of all she had done, the assault set her heart racing the fastest. She had an army - the smallest of armies - but now that meant she had people to protect. Link placed a steadying hand at her back."We await your orders," he said, gesturing to Rhoamet."If he's ready, then so are we."Link appraised the automaton warmly. "Oh, he's ready," he said.They walked as a trio, with their force of Gorons and Gerudo behind them; Princess, Knight, Guardian. A flash of white caught her eye above; a Rito warrior returning to his Beast.The arrows from the Castle had ceased, though Zelda held her hand ready lest they need a barrier. Silent eyes watched from the walls of the Castle, bows held ready, threatening; any further and you die. Zelda smiled up at them. She smiled to keep her features soft, to hide the rage. If she could throw them all into Hylia River, she would."We wish to speak with Cinelgen," Zelda announced, addressing the watchers.They turned to one another in confusion. "Give us free passage and we will not attack."There was shouting from within the walls; barked orders, confused questions, what did you just say?"They expect a fight," Zelda said."Then give them one," Link returned.Zelda raised her hand skywards, sending a lance of energy up towards Vah Medoh. The clouds had opened, the rain falling in thick and heavy droplets. The sky flashed; thunder groaning above. Winter's break; the first storm of Spring.Three taps on Rhoamet's shell from Link and without warning, without mercy, the Guardian fired off a barrage of energy into the gates of Hyrule Castle. They splintered and twisted and the watchers cried out, some ducking and some fleeing. Zelda heard screaming from within the Castle. Once the debris settled, the path into Hyrule Castle was clear."WITH ME!" Link roared, his cries echoed by the fighters behind him. Unhindered, the envoy stormed into the Castle, as above, the Rito cascaded down from Vah Medoh.Arrows rained down around them. Some from the Rito. Some from the bandits, joining the storm all the same. The Gorons streamed past, barrelling through the gates, with the Gerudo following not far behind. Zelda held her barrier high, protecting them all. The rain was in her eyes, her hair, her face, as she sprinted into it along the Western Passage, with Link at her side. The way it should be. The watchers on the wall fell one by one as the Rito swooped and dived, cawing and calling, their battle cries a song.A wall of shields met them in front of the first Gatehouse, crumpling like paper as the Gorons rolled on through. Metal met stone; the Gorons and Successors threw themselves at each other, Yunobo leading the charge, his Champion scarf a whip in the harsh winds. Link took Zelda's hand and together they weaved through the chaos, stumbling into First Gatehouse. The Gerudo were already in the courtyard ahead, riding down bandits that waited for them, horses rearing, screaming, blood on the dirt as one caught an arrow through the neck, its rider toppling.More bandit archers descended from within the Gatehouse. Too many to catch. Zelda fired arrow after arrow as Link dodged those that were sent their way. The windows were bordered, and she could barely see. Pain blossomed on her arm, a slice through her Rito coat as an arrow grazed her skin. Zelda let the pain pass and soon felt nothing at all. One archer fell, and then another, and then another, until Zelda looked around and realised the arrows were coming from the opposite side of the Gatehouse."Teba!" she cried, relief washing through her. The Rito warrior stood in the far doorway, his Falcon bow drawn, and eyes narrow, only stopping to give her a cursory nod before returning his attention to the bandits."Go!" he told them. "Cinelgen is just beyond the other Gatehouse!"Link and Zelda bolted forward, hand in hand once again, bursting out into the courtyard only to be intercepted by two bandits - a Hylian and Zora, both bloodied and frenzied, swords glinting in the sudden sun. The Zora lunged for her and Zelda dodged, shifting towards Link. He spun on his heel, elbowing the Zora in the stomach and raising his sword to block the incoming blow from the Hylian. The Zora was staggered just long enough; Zelda scrambled for her bow, drawing a light arrow and burying it in the Zora's chest. She pivoted, drew her bow again, exhaled and fired, knocking down the Hylian attacker just as Link had raised his sword again to strike."Nicely done," he breathed, his smile almost proud. She could have kissed him right then and there until she spotted a tuft of red hair among the fray in the courtyard ahead. Cinelgen."There!" she shouted. He was toe to toe with Buliara; she fought hard, but Cinelgen was quick, wielding a feathered Rito sword was dizzying ease. The spear-wielder Milagre was at his side. Zelda raised her bow towards them, but a bolt of lightning cracked the gathering twilight, illuminating the Castle in a shock of white. For a moment she was staggered, blinded, and the Gerudo was gone, fleeing into the second Gatehouse. To her left the Zora were speeding up along the alley path, waving her down.Sidon met them at the centre of the courtyard, shouting, "He has a boat! At the waterfalls!"But Zelda was not listening. "It doesn't matter! He will not escape." And she waved her forces into the Second Gatehouse. Sidon and Buliara followed close behind, with Teba and the Gorons - who had finally dispatched the first wave of bandits - closing in behind them.They spilled into the Second Gatehouse with weapons ready, and Cinelgen met them from the balcony with little more than a laugh. All too late, Zelda realised that the doors had been closed behind them."It's a trap!" Teba shouted, echoing her thoughts. "We need to go," he wrapped a wingtip around Zelda's arm as the more bandits appeared in the balconies."Wait, don't!" Sidon cried, pointed to the archers, "Look! You go and they shoot you down!""Ohhh, man!" Yunobo whined. Buliara silently brought her claymore to bear. The party formed a circle, back to back, weapons ready; Teba with his bow, Buliara with her claymore, Sidon with his trident, and Yunobo with his crusher. Zelda drew her bow, and beside her, Link held the Master Sword ready. They stood in solidarity, ready to meet Cinelgen's onslaught.Down from the parapets a ring of attackers surrounded them; long spears in hand, angled forwards, tower shields held in a clean circle, only broken where a spear was threaded through. A crush.Zelda raised a hand, erecting a shielding dome around the party. She felt the force of the bandit's spears against her palm, trying in vain to break the barrier."I can't hold forever," she called. "Are we ready!?""Ready!" echoed the others. Link intertwined his hand in hers for just a moment, and together turned towards their attackers. She dropped the shield.Arrows whistled past; one lodged in Link's shield, another bouncing ineffectually off of Yunobo's thick chest; one catching Prince Sidon in the leg, only managing to scrape his scales. Zelda returned fire as quickly as she could."Don't miss!" Teba shouted, taking aim for Cinelgen. The arrow sailed past him, snapping against the roof of the Gatehouse."Take your own advice!" Zelda called back.Further inwards the bandits pressed, and closer together the party drew. Link dove and cut one of the bandits down, but the circle only pressed in tighter. A spear jutted towards Zelda's side, but Teba shoved her out of the way, the tip piecing his wing, blood trailing down his feathers. With a scream, Zelda raised her hand and blasted the bandit in front of them, sending him careening into the Gatehouse wall. The circle of shields was not broken.And just as they seemed caught, the doors of the Gatehouse were suddenly blasted open, the smell of molten and smoke filling the air. Zelda covered her eyes, ducking under the debris that was launched through the arena. The bandits around them had scrambled, spears forgotten, and when she opened her eyes she saw a silhouette in the doorway, and the source of their panic."Rhoamet!" Link cried, shoving his way through the bandits towards his Guardian."Get down!" Buliara shouted, and they all dropped to the floor. Another energy beam tore through the Gatehouse, destroying the second door on the far side of the arena. Zelda looked up to where Cinelgen had been; but he was already gone."Retreat, retreat!" came the call from the bandits. They fled in all directions - towards the courtyard, towards the Eastern Passage, and Zelda knew the scales were tipping. The assault became a chase as Rhoamet bore down on the bandits, with Link riding tandem, extending a hand down to Zelda to pull her onto the Guardian. What remained of her forces ran behind them, pursuing the bandits all the way to the throne room. The Gorons battered down the doors, and Zelda caught sight of Cinelgen within."Protect Rhoamet!" she shouted at the party as she and Link bolted into the Sanctum.Cinelgen waited at the throne, arms wide. "Welcome home, Princess! Or should I say, Rito Princess!" he boomed down at them. Milagre stood to his left, on one of the curved stairwells, while the Hylian named Inglis stood off to the right, near a side entrance that led to another open courtyard beyond. His face was bloodied, though his weapon - a traveller's longsword -was clean. The remainder of the bandits had either fled entirely, or were huddled around the edges of the room."It's over, Cinna," Link said."No! No it isn't!" The Gerudo laughed. "Come, fight a little more with me.""We're not here to fight!" Zelda shouted up at him. Her own forces were filing into the room then; no bandits remained beyond the throne room walls."If you want Cinna you will go through us," Milagre warned.My thoughts exactly. Zelda turned to Link, motioning towards Inglis. "He's yours," she said, and she sprinted towards the stairs to where Milagre stood.The room was at once abuzz. The last scraps of her army clashed with Cinelgen's - their plans for a pointed attack forgotten. A bandit cut her off as she reached the stairs, but Zelda blocked his blind stab, turning to send a surge of energy into his chest, and wrenching his spear free from his hands. You should be able to do this in your sleep. Teba's drills and Link's water dance came back to her in a heartbeat and she thrust the spear towards Milagre. The Yiga woman blocked, bringing her own spear in a long arc towards Zelda's neck. She dodged, reeling backwards, and together they stepped across the stairs. Two steps forward, two steps back, they traded blows and shouts, drawing blood here and there, in an arm, nails across the face, a nick in the neck."Better and better," Milagre teased, and Zelda roared, pushing her harder, fighting, and fighting, Cinelgen forgotten, her fury all she could see.Below, Link and the Inglis were engaged in their own tussle, blows hesitant, strangely light. Steel rang against steel, slower than the rest of the fighters around them."Let me pass!" Link shouted. "Please!"But Inglis would not let up. "I won't let you kill him!""I won't!"The Akkalan would not listen; with both hands he swung his sword wildly, but Link caught the blow, redirecting his weight backwards, seizing Inglis by the arm and tossing him against the planks. Regaining his balance Link leapt up the curved stairway towards Cinelgen, the Master Sword raised and ready to strike. "Don't - please!" Inglis begged, scrambling to his feet, but Link had no choice.The Gerudo caught his first strike easily, cackling, taunting, "So this is the Hero at last!"Link's attention split. As he parried a curt stab from Cinelgen's Rito sword, he saw the Akkalan turn in his periphery, facing an advancing Zora attacker. One of Sidon's. But Inglis had moved too slow. The silver spear glanced off of his temple, and the throne room was filled with his screams. Both Link and Cinelgen cried out at once, turning in unison towards the Akkalan. Blood was streaming down his left side, his hands to his face, to the side of his head. To where his ear had been."Milagre!" the Gerudo shouted. "Inglis!"At once the Yiga woman turned and, understanding what had happened, lobbed her spear towards the Zora. The tip lodged clean in his neck, sending him tumbling backwards across the wooden floor."Let's go!" Cinna shouted, tearing away from Link and leaping from the balcony. Milagre followed, meeting Inglis and Cinelgen at the centre of the room. Together they fled to through the eastern side entrance, out to the open courtyard beyond and its cliffside bluffs.The waterfall! Link realised. He vaulted from the balcony, breathless as he sprinted after the trio. He found Zelda at the edge of the courtyard, having pursued them on foot. She had her bow drawn but was unmoving, unable to advance, and then he saw.Cinelgen was stood at the edge of the cliff, his arm around Inglis' neck, and a knife to the Akkalan's bloodied face."Any movement, and he dies," Cinelgen said calmly. "You wouldn't do that to a friend, would you?""He's going to escape! Link!" Zelda cried, arms trembling under the weight of her bow.Inglis' eyes met Link's; deep pools of solemn brown. He shook his head, and mouthed something Link could not read, eyes were glistening; tears from the pain, of every kind."Let him," Link said, resigning. "He's won."Ahead, Cinelgen erupted into a shrill, gleeful laughter. He blew them a kiss, and threw the dagger to the ground. Zelda loosed her arrow, but it was not fast enough; a single step took Cinelgen and Inglis over the edge of the cliff.Link and Zelda bolted forward, reaching the cliff's edge in time to see Cinelgen and Inglis plunge into the waterfalls below. Beyond, he saw the boat Sidon had spotted - hardly bigger than Aurelia's paddle boat, but equipped with a dozen oars. It rolled and banked against the winds of the storm, and soon disappeared from sight.Zelda was moving forward, as if ready to leap after them, but Link seized her and held her back, though every ounce of his being wanted to leap as well. Let me go, she was shouting, pounding at his hands, but he gripped her tight, shaking, overcome. He couldn’t do it, in the end. He couldn’t keep his promise and save Inglis of Akkala.He released his hold on Zeld but only to collapse, weeping for the loss of his friend, as around them the rain continued to fall.It was Teba that found them, still huddled together. He listened with a clenched beak as Zelda explained. She had been quick to understand; the Hylian Inglis was an ally. And now he could be as good as dead. With soothing words and gentle hands, Zelda ushered Link to his feet.Behind them, the throne room was empty. They walked inside together.The others were waiting for them; Sidon, Yunobo and Buliara. Their people had rounded up the rest of the bandits, though few remained, and they waited outside at Teba's behest. Let her have this, he had told them. As they walked into the throne room, Zelda cast her eyes over the broken marble, the bloodstained floor, the torn banners. So this is the Castle. She climbed the stairs once again, one at a time, and stood before the throne.It was hers. The musty velvet. The hard marble. Her inheritance at last. Her destiny. Zelda turned to the eyes gazing up at her, and sat down."Bring me those who remain," she said.Night had finally fallen when the remaining Successors and Yiga were brought into the throne room. Zelda did not sit in her father’s throne, but stood face to face with her captives, on the ground level of the throne room. Link stood at her side, while her envoy waited behind them.There were barely more than a dozen. All bloodied and battered. Link ran the count in his head, and informed her that at least twenty had escaped. The bandits before them were young, she realised. Barely more than teenagers, perhaps some the same age as her. Hylians and Zora only, as well. The Gerudo had either fled or were killed, and the Rito that remained with Cinelgen were so few in number that it was possible they were all dead.Zelda turned to her envoy, and to Link. "I would have them killed for their crimes. But what do you think?""For abetting Cinelgen, I agree. They are traitors," Buliara said."As do I," Riju echoed.Sidon too was with her. "For the chaos they have caused, exile at least."She did not expect Teba to object, nor Link. The Rito was firm. "They are children. Barely more than youths.""They are your people," Link added. "They deserve a second chance."Zelda considered their words carefully. Some of the bandits were Yiga, she saw, dressed in the traditional red garb. They looked at her with nothing more than fear. If they had Yiga masks, they were lost."You have a choice. Stay and help us clean this place up. Or go, return home to your families," Zelda decreed. Her voice felt so small in such a lofty room, but she was determined to be decisive. "Return to Cinelgen if that is what you wish - I will not keep you. But know that he is our enemy, and rejoining him makes you our enemy as well." She gestured around to the bodies that still littered the room. "And forget not what happened here.""And don't forget that he abandoned you," Link told them. "Don't forget how he treated you."In the end, all of the bandits elected to stay, pledging themselves into Zelda's service; with the exception of the pair of Yiga acolytes. Two young men, with wide faces. Brothers, introducing themselves as Aitee and Pich."We want to go home," said Aitee."Wherever that is now," said the Pich.Link frowned at them. "You should have gone with Aurelia." His tone was scolding, and Zelda wondered who this Aurelia was. Such a pretty name; she wondered if it belonged to a pretty face.The brothers protested in unison. "We were afraid!" they cried. Zelda heard Link sigh. She knew there was more to this story; three months worth of tales and exploits that they would need to catch each other up on."If you want to go home, find Aurelia. Tell her what happened here,” Link said.Together, with reverence, the Yiga brothers bowed, and they went.It was well into the night by the time Link and Zelda finally found some rest. The envoy of Zelda's forces too had decided to stay, if only for a few days, to close their wounds and prepare for the journey home. It was only after they had all supped - raiding the kitchens and feasting in the Dining Hall - that the realisation had hit her; she was home. Home as herself, home as the Princess. The Castle may be in pieces, crawling with Malice, more a ruin than anything else. But she was here. And Link was here. She'd watched him tuck fervently into his dinner with a hidden smile, pinching herself and running her fingers through her hair to make sure she was awake.Midnight found them standing on the balcony between her old chambers and her study. Neither had been able to sleep. Zelda had knocked on Link's door to find him still awake and scribbling in a journal. He was making plans; unable to let himself rest while he knew there was work to do, and people to save.Zelda coaxed him away from his desk with a kiss on the back of his neck, and the promise of more if they went for a walk. Ostensibly to clear their heads; in truth she just wanted to speak to him alone.They stood side by side, looking down towards the Gatehouses and Castle walls beyond. Zelda caught sight of a flickering light in the distance - a camp in one of the Gatehouses. Teba most likely, needing his space and his isolation.The storm had passed a few hours prior, the wind blowing low, and silent. Above the sky was clear and filled with stars. In the quiet, Zelda wrapped a hand around Link's."Promise me you'll rest," she said softly. "The war can wait one night.""Can Inglis?" Link challenged. He sighed, slumping forwards. "Sorry. I guess I'm still upset."She gave his hand a squeeze. "We'll find him, Link. And Cinelgen too. We'll end this war once and for all."He sighed again, and Zelda wondered what it would be like to bring his hand to her lips. Would she find callouses there? Or scars? He must have so many scars. Uncountable as the stars above them.Cutting through her idle thoughts Link spoke again, "I just can't believe the Rito had allied with Cinelgen. I should have known when I saw Yinli. I should have said something.""Is that why you sent me there?" Zelda asked.He shrugged. "It was a lucky guess. Mostly I wanted you out of danger. I just… had a hunch, but I had no idea it would be that complex." He unravelled his fingers from hers and leant with both hands atop the wall of the balcony, his body taut, uneased. A cold wind blew between them, and Zelda shuddered. The last of winter still clung to the air."You gave me a fright, you know that?" she said, rubbing small circles into his back to try to calm him. “I’ve never been teleported without warning before.”Link flashed her a wry smile. "Oh, no problem, Princess," he teased. "I only saved your life."Zelda pouted, giving him a gentle pinch. "I would have been fine.""Yeah," Link smiled, sliding an arm around the small of her back. "I know you would have."This was how it should have been. Just the two of them. Together, at last. Zelda leant her head on his shoulder. He smelt of cotton and salt, sesame oil and smoke; lingering scents like memories. And he was warm, warmer even than her Rito coat, and when he kissed her his breath was hot against her cheeks. There was a loneliness that pervaded him, she realised, a hollowness to his soul, the strength of his embrace betraying a desperation. What was it he had once told her? All I have is you.Another gust of cold air; Zelda broke away, and the protest was immediate."Hey, come back," Link murmured needily. "Where do you think you're going?"As if she had any intention of leaving now. Zelda took him by the hand, leading him towards her study. "Somewhere quiet," she said, realising what he needed. What they both wanted.They closed the door behind them, and the room was lit only by the soft glow of her hand and the sapphire radiance of a single Silent Princess growing in the corner. She walked over to her desk, removing her heavy coat and straightening out Link’s Champion tunic that she still wore. Link leant against the door, watching, and when she turned she saw his eyes dart away from her. He was looking at her, really looking, and she blushed.Zelda stood against her desk, but the knight did not move. Caught between present and past. Anticipation and apprehension. She nodded for him to join her. "Don't you think we've waited long enough?""Is that an order?" Link asked.Link's eyes never left hers. Mischievous and wild, they were; calm waters caught fire. He raised a hand to the bolt on the door, and slid it shut.“I am your Princess, aren't I?" she said with a laugh. "Perhaps you should bow before me."Three long strides took him across the room to her, and he braced his hands at edge of her desk, leaning in close, capturing her with his mouth.Something broke between them then; months of longing coming to a head, the swell of the storm. Being alone together was no longer enough. The air was thick and heady between them, the cool supplanted where they connected. Link's hands quickly found her hips, lifting her onto the desk. She laughed again, drawing him in close, giggles turning to gasps as Link planted a row of feather-light kisses from her neck to her ear."As you wish," he whispered.And he sank to his knees on the stone.
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
It had not been what she expected.Not the Castle. Not the takeback. And especially not the aftermath. But then, on reflection, what course of action of theirs had not been derailed by chaos or chance? At least you are here, Zelda told herself. Here at last.Here with Link. That was what she had wanted. Just to be alone with him - truly alone - but it had become something much more.Maybe it was the longing. Maybe it was the bruises and scars they shared. Maybe it was the feeling that they had never been anyone but who they were in that moment – desperate for each other and for some respite from the casual savagery of the world around them. But whatever the cause, the result had been something primal and frantic; Link, clumsy and still half-clothed, taking her against that old desk at her urging, punctuated by nervous laughter and whisperings of can I, can we and Goddess, yes, I think, yes, don't think, just, just…And even the thought of that made her blush, even now, especially now, and shake herself to make sense of it, and what they had done. Hardly Queenly of you, she thought, but then she wasn't really Queen. The Royal Family were all gone, and her titles, claims and expectations with it. The Calamity may have taken all she had been, but in return, it had given her her freedom.Freedom she had to put to use; there was always work to be done. A Castle to repair. A Kingdom to rebuild. A traitor to track down. A Knight to rediscover. And eventually, maybe, a crown to wear, once she got around to it.Zelda stepped into the Hyrule Castle Library with stride. Work was welcome. Work had kept her alive in those first few months with Link, and in those months without. She caught an early morning sunbeam in her palm and turned to survey the long, dilapidated hall. The broken floor crunched under her boot, and the air was thick with the smell of reverence, and the musk of age, and the faintest metallic hint of blood. So much could be salvaged here; hundreds of books that could still be readable.And then, with a smile teasing on her lips, Zelda turned to the boy standing at her side, who was gazing up at the rows of old books in quiet awe."Before you start, could you remind me how Magnesis works?" she asked, holding out the Shiekah Slate.Dutifully, breezily making her blush once again with no more than a simper, Link took the Slate from her hands and began to explain.“Okay, okay.. steady.. and…” there was a loud crash. “No! Damn it!”Then the electric hum of the Sheikah Slate started up again as Zelda prepared for another attempt. From his position on one the upper mezzanines of the Hyrule Castle Library, Link as he kept a curious eye on her endeavours to test the Magnesis Rune on the bookshelves of the Hyrule Castle Library.He leaned lazily against the railing and thumbing a corner of his tunic. He was in a dual state. Mind half here; half there. First watching over Zelda, but also scanning the books before him, searching for information that could further his work with Rhoamet. The titles were faded, obscured by dust and time. Link scanned the tomes with squinting eyes, head cocked to one side, tonguing a tooth and mentally repeating the word he sought; guardians, guardians, guardians.He rolled his shoulders, letting his mind wander, cataloguing the dull ache in his muscles; the ache of battle, of a dance, of a song. With the Sword over his shoulder and his Champion tunic at his back, the ache was as familiar as it was fond.He'd never part with the Sword now, or the Champion tunic - especially not since it had become so redolent of her. Not since she'd been wearing it the evening before, back where his duelling mind was so eager to wander, when they had met in the tower of her study and left the rest of Hyrule behind.There was a clank below him as Zelda wrenched one of the old bookcases forwards with the Magnesis rune, revealing an antechamber beneath the curved stairs at the far side of the room. "Interesting…" he heard her say.Link tried to focus back on the books. It had occurred to him that morning — after waking up in her old room and her old bed and barely able to believe where he was — that there might be something in the Library about Guardians - perhaps some research notes. But he doubted it, somehow. The Shiekah's research had always been elusive, like the Shiekah themselves. He remembered that it was never spoken of in public, or in court. Only in private meetings, in quiet whispers. Not the kind of thing that would be published.He blinked away a receding weariness, unable to concentrate. Every word was her; the titles on the spines, the blurbs of the heavy tomes he flipped through. They spoke her name. Every pause brought him back to her side, back to that study, bringing a yearning for her and the new and thrilling feeling that he’d never have enough.Link abandoned his search and made for the antechamber.There was a stillness to the small room that gave the impression of having been sealed, as though rot and decay of Hyrule Castle had not come to this place. The walls were a rich burgundy, the carpet lush, though there was little more to be found than a reading desk, and some darkly patterned shields, strewn about the floor like forgotten socks. A Royal Guard's shield, he remembered. For a time he had carried one of these, though it was more ornamental than practical. Faintly and with chagrin, he recalled dropping one, and watching it shatter at his feet, Otra's voice in his head once more; These damned shields, useless, just like everything else those Sheikah give us!"I've never even seen this room before," Zelda said as she searched the drawers of the desk. "It was hidden, it seems. Maybe this is where the Sheikah left their notes before the Calamity?""Hopefully," Link replied as he examined the make of one of the shields.He heard the rustling of paper and saw that Zelda had found a large, leather-bound diary, so ponderous that she held with both hands. When she plied through the stiff pages to the inner leaf, she gasped. "This…this is…" her fingers dug into the leather binding. "Father’s…"Link went to her side, peering over her shoulder to read the contents of the journal;
Today, as the sun rose and a new day was born, my daughter, too, joined this sweet world. In keeping with the traditions of the royal family, I have decided to name her… Zelda.
"Oh…" he murmured. "Oh, no."Voice trembling, eyes glassy with the threat of tears, Zelda began to read aloud. "If the Ganon prophecy wasn't looming over our heads, I would tell her to take her time... To wait until she is ready..." She paused, collecting herself, and turned the pages as though they were as heavy as stone. "I'd love nothing more than to console her... But I must stay strong. Even if she comes to despise me..."She could not go on, slumping forward with resignation. Link placed his hands under hers, and they held the weight of the journal together. For a moment he wanted to take it from her, to shield her, protect her from any harm that could come for her. But their past belonged to them both. "Do you want to keep reading?" he asked.Sniffling, Zelda raised her head and nodded. She spoke slowly, with regal detachment."I have been told my Zelda went to the Spring of Wisdom. If she comes back without success, then I shall speak kindly with her. P-perhaps…" she blinked at the words, unfathoming, her voice fading to a whisper. "Perhaps, I should encourage her to keep researching her beloved relics. They may just lead her to answers I can't provide. For now, I sit anxiously. I sit... and await my daughter's return."When she was done, Zelda closed the diary and held it to her chest. She closed her eyes, hands crossed about the book as if in prayer. As if somehow, Rhoam might hear."You old fool," she muttered, two lonely, stubborn tears on her cheeks. "I wish we had spoken. I wish you had told me how you felt."Link drew her in close, and she pressed her face in against his tunic to dry her tears.Zelda spoke into his chest. "When I was a girl, all I ever heard was how prosperous my father's reign was. All the knowledge and power he amassed. I thought it came so naturally to him, as though the gods had chosen him. But I never understood… the pressure that drove him. And the fear." She raised her head. A sunbeam caught her hair, crowning her. "I'm so afraid, Link. I know nothing about ruling."The sight of her was arresting. The thaw had come, unmasking them both, it seemed. How could he tell her? That he felt as though they had finally met? Link grasped her by the shoulders, fingers padding the tense muscles of her shoulders through her thick Rito coat."You won’t be not alone," he said."No, not anymore," She said, and clutched the journal tighter in her arms, and it occurred to Link then just how much of their shared past could be contained within those pages. Words of my father? His name? His face? He couldn't help but wonder. Link needed a name to that haunting, disapproving voice.There was a flustered sigh from the Library entrance, and both Link and Zelda turned to see Larella jogging over to the entrance of the antechamber."There you are, Your Grace, Champion," she said, stopping to bow. When she saw their close embrace, she pulled back from the doorway, bowing again. "My apologies for intruding. You are needed."Leaving the Library and its secrets behind, they followed the Ambassador through the Castle.The Spring rains had come, drizzling across the Castle grounds, washing away most of the damage and the bloodshed. Zelda's new devotees — the half dozen or so that were left — had begun to clean what the rain could not. They were Cinelgen's former followers, now hers for the sake of survival. Her first subjects; Hylians, once wanderers. She promised them a home so long as they helped build it.Regrettably, however, their first job was the grisly task of giving rest to the dead, and the casualties had not been few. Zelda counted ten dead of her own; two Zora, six Rito, and two Gerudo. But most of the dead wore neckerchiefs, she noted, and had sprouted arrows from their necks, their chests, and temples too. Quick deaths, she assured herself.She offered that the dead be buried in the holt of twisting evergreens that surrounded the Sacred Grounds - all of them, even the traitors. The fallen are now the innocents of war, no matter the side they fought for, she had said.It was a gesture of unity. The first of many that will be needed, Link had advised when she announced her decision.And as Larella led them into the courtyard between the two Gatehouses, she knew that his advice was sound. A bitter argument was brewing, discordant shouts, and grumbles cutting through the rain.Each new Champion stood with their followers waiting anxiously in tow, fighting for a word in edgewise. And at the centre, the nexus of the disagreement, was the white-feather Rito warrior, and the little Gerudo Chief.Buliara stood imposingly at Riju's back, claymore not far from reach, and Riju mirrored her bodyguard's stance; wide legged, heels driving a sharp point into pavement. She was pointing, her golden gloved hand accusing. "When exactly were you going to tell us?""It didn't change the outcome, did it?" Teba retorted.Link and Zelda pushed through the anxious crowd while Larella sidled in next to Sidon. The Zora Prince had his arms crossed, while at his side Yunobo held a gormless, perpetually concerned expression on his wide face."Is everything okay?" Zelda asked.They all spoke at once, until Zelda held her hands, waving frantically for some decorum. From the silence, Sidon was the first to speak, the gravity in his voice giving her pause. "It has come to our attention that the Rito were recently allied with Cinelgen.""Allied?" Riju scoffed. "The Rito aided a traitor - a war monger!" She faced the Rito warrior as though she were as hardened, battle-worn, and indeed as tall as he was. "Have you any idea what he has done to my people, to my home?"“Of course I do!” Teba scowled, squinting down at her as though she were a pest. "Do you have any idea what he did to mine? Killed three of our best flyers! Turned my own wife against me!""Your wife?" Sidon said. "If she was involved, weren’t you as well?"The warrior bristled. "I did not know. On the Goddess I swear it.”“Your own wife went behind your back?”“That’s a personal question!”"Some warrior you are, unable to protect your own family from that usurper," Riju said cruelly, and Teba turned back to her with a wing held ready as if to seize her. Buliara, as graceful as she was forceful, stepped calmly in between them.She met Teba's eye line, and the warrior stepped back, though her words were directed at both of the duelling Champions. "We gain nothing by fighting.""Indeed, Buliara," Zelda said, grateful for the imposing woman's presence. She felt as though she could do nothing but watch the alliance she had built crumble against the pride of its members and the paranoia that pervaded them. She could be falling again, with no ground beneath her feet, and she would feel more assured than she did right now.But she had learned, perhaps too late, that diplomacy was not just trade. It was common ground. The fact that they all stood at Hyrule Castle together in this moment was proof of that."We need to find Cinelgen," Zelda said, to convince herself as much as anyone else.The others turned towards her, and just slightly she felt the tension ease."But where would he be?" Yunobo piped up, solid fingers pawing his Goron amulet. He passed an open glance to the fields beyond the Castle. "Hyrule is huge! He’s just one guy!”Zelda looked to Link, who had until now hung back behind her. “You knew him best,” she said.He nodded in agreement, and thought for a moment, all eyes on him. “He had people everywhere. People who we can find. He will go where his people go.""People everywhere, you say?" Riju asked. Her eyes found Teba when she said, "How do you know that Cinelgen doesn't have people here?""Oh, get off," the Rito sneered. The crowd simmered, mumbling and whispering, their faces ruffled by the wind, by the tension interlaced between them. This is what Cinelgen would want, Zelda told herself. She pressed in closer between Riju and Teba."I will have no blind accusations on my grounds. Cinelgen could be as far as Karusa Valley soon if we do not act!""We came to rescue Link," Sidon reminded her. "And we did. Larella and I have our own battles to fight at the Domain."Teba nodded at the Zora Prince. "I have my people to protect at home."Even Riju agreed. "And mine too.""This war will not end without Cinelgen," Zelda implored, gaze shifting between the Champions."Then you should have killed him," Teba countered. "A dagger, Zelda, not a hammer. Wasn't that what you said?""That cannot be helped!" she said, heat rising in her voice.Teba dismissed her with a simple flick of his wing. "Well I agree with the Goron. He’s just one man.""And yet you allied with him," Sidon frowned. "Surely your people could see his evil nature."That was all it took. Like rabid hounds, they began to snap at each other, hungry for scraps."Aren't your people the ones starving out all of Gerudo?" Teba replied."If anything, she started it when she locked the Zora out of her city. Then her people attacked my home, my father!” Sidon pointed down at Riju. She pivoted on her heel as if struck, quickly retaliating."My people? What about yours?” she hissed. "They tried to attack Divine Beast Vah Naboris! Now they’ve besieged us, trying to take control of our only bridge to Hyrule!”"I did not call for the siege!”“And I did not call for the attack!”"And I am not the idiots who allied those bandits!" Teba added."Please, enough! We are not each other’s enemies!" Zelda bellowed, her voice feeling like thunder. “Everything that has happened has been because of Cinelgen. If we cannot work together, he wins no matter what!"Riju had her hands on her hips, unyielding. "And how do we do that?"“That is what we must work out now,” Zelda said, hesitating. What if she now said the wrong thing? Brokering peace between the four Champions was proving more difficult than she could have imagined.Link, who had been standing at her side in a pensive silence, spoke again. He looked to the Zora Prince. "Sidon, what did you mean by battles at home?"Larella's face lit up, and she leapt at the opportunity to speak. "Sidon is the rightful ruler of Zora's Domain," she nodded to Riju. "And he has no qualms with the Gerudo. If we can re-crown him, he can end the war in a single decree."Sidon raised his hand as if to pat her on the back, but for some reason, he hesitated. Instead, he curled his fingers into a fist and grinned. "Larella is quite knowledgeable with this! It won't be easy, but I believe we can manage.""Then you can do your part from there," Link said, and he and Zelda exchanged a look.In an instant, she understood his tactic. They could work together without working together.Collected, with solid spine, Zelda tightened her grip on her Father's journal that she still held in her hands."Return home then, all of you. Continue your work to bring about peace in your homelands, we ask only that you help us find Cinelgen," she instructed, before turning to Teba and his Rito. "Can you spare enough people as scouts? If they see him, they could ensure word reaches the Castle.""It’s tough, but we can do it. I’ll send eight flyers, one for each region of Hyrule,” Teba said, and immediately the Rito at his back began to whisper among themselves, speculating on who would be chosen.“Our guards can keep watch too,” Sidon said with a balled fist. “He will never reach Lanayru.”“I’ll talk to the Boss too!” Yunobo added. “Our guys working the mines see everyone who comes through Eldin.”Only Riju had not spoken. Zelda gave Link a surreptitious nod. Your turn."Cinna will probably fall back to Karusa Valley, but we can’t let him,” Link turned to Riju. “I know Gerudo Canyon is already blocked off. But Cinna might head through the Highlands or the grasslands. Could you send people to those parts?"Riju placed a slender hand to her lips; stumped, she looked to Buliara. The bodyguard passed a glance back to her guardswomen. "We can spare two or three," Riju said. “They could spot him before he gets anywhere near Gerudo.”"We should send someone to Karusa, just in case he’s already through," Link went on, an idle finger tracing his chin. “Someone who can move fast and confront him if need be.”As he spoke, Zelda could not help but hear the words in her mind; a strategist, through and through. When she returned her focus to the crowd, she realised that all eyes were on them."You can't mean us?" she protested. "If we do run into Cinelgen’s forces, there’s only two of us!"“This is what you have asked of us, Princess,” Buliara said."We can take Rhoamet," Link suggested, his voice an immediate, pacifying presence."Are you sure?" Zelda asked. Crossing the country, travelling again, but with that ancient automaton? She could hardly imagine it, but Link seemed sure."Karusa is our best bet. Rhoamet will slow us down, but with a Guardian, we'll never be ambushed."Zelda's mind raced, latching onto yet another concern. "And what of the Castle? We are yet to bury those who fell to reclaim it. Would we leave it unguarded so soon?"It was Yunobo who answered. "We can guard it," he offered through a shining grin, and behind him, his Goron brothers were nodding, thumping their chests. "Your Hylians, plus my brawlers. We'll shut the gates and let no one in but you, Princess!"“You would really stay, instead of going home to protect your people?”Yunobo was undaunted. “If anyone wants to mess with Eldin, they’ll have to deal with Death Mountain! I’ll send a letter to the Boss. He’ll understand.”“We can take it for you,” Teba said solemnly. “Our captured couriers were not yet well enough to return to service.”Zelda took a deep breath, trying once again to ground herself; to find a presence amongst the uncertainty. The faces of the Champions encircled her, waiting with expectant expressions for her answer. She held her Father's journal tight under her arm. This was what it meant to rule, she knew - to feel the weight of duty."It is settled then," she finally said, extending her right hand towards the centre of the circle. "You do your part, and we will do ours."One by one, hand over wing over fin, the rest of her Champions followed suit.Less than three nights after the capture of Hyrule Castle, the fortress was nearly vacated once more. Link watched from the battlements above the main gates as the Zora, and the Rito departed for home. The sun was out, and the air almost heady with newfound warmth. At his side, Rhoamet sat quietly, having climbed up the battlements to meet him. Hello, he had said, settling into to survey the fields below. Was he keeping watch? Or just observing? Was he curious, even?Link wanted to ask, to talk to his automaton, but his mind was uneased. A winter living under the Cinelgen's thumb had taught him not to underestimate the Gerudo, even now. As Link thought on the journey ahead, all manner of unsettling thoughts and scenarios came to him. What if Cinna means to retake the Castle when we leave? What if our loyalists betray us? What if Karusa becomes a trap? What if… what if...The only remedy was to prepare for each one. Notes and plans, possibilities and probabilities; he spent a lot of time writing, and his notebook was almost full."Still a brooder, I see."Link spun on his heel, and like an apparition, there she was. Leaning against Rhoamet's shell, her arms crossed and her sleeves rolled, Zelda giggled at his shocked expression. She wore her old white blouse and had unbuttoned it at the top, her Rito coat tied around her waist. Running a hand across Rhoamet's patterned swirls, she looked up into the automaton's eye with a warm smile. "He just won't leave your side, will he?""I can't keep him away," Link said. "Even up here. He's a better climber than I imagined."Zelda hummed in agreement, and reached up to adjust her braids; as her shirt moved, Link noticed the small seam at the shoulder where it had been repaired. Where she had been stabbed by Milagre."I asked Teba if he had any advice, before he left," she said with a sad smile, her eyes hooded as she followed Rhoamet's line of sight down to Hyrule Field. "All he said was to stay alive. And that if anything happened to me he’d end Cinelgen himself.”Link raised his brows. She’d evidently made an impression on the old Rito."I wanted to thank him for looking after you, but…" he said, noting the well-made bow she wore at her back. "Well, from what I heard, you did most of the work."The praise went unnoticed. "I had help. From Kass, from you." She joined him at the battlements. "You were alone.""I had Inglis, in the end. And this old thing." He gave one of Rhoamet's legs a gentle kick. The Guardian's head locked in his direction, though if it was offended he would not know. Link went on, words leaden, "I recovered some memories too. I remembered the day we walked together in the garden, and I told you about Mipha."Zelda chuckled. "So you finally remembered that, did you?"Link tensed. So she had known the whole time. "Yeah..." he sighed.She pursed her lips, hollowed cheeks drawn in. "I'm sorry you never got the time with her that you deserved. And I’m sorry that I couldn't tell you, but it was your past, not mine." She met his eyes then, and he saw something accusing in her glare. "Still, I should have boxed your ears. Those days before the Calamity were hard for everyone. You ought to have seized happiness wherever you could."Link smiled, in spite of himself, and in spite of the solemn topic. He had expected a little jealousy from Zelda as they discussed his long lost love; but instead he found only acceptance and compassion, and felt a finality within him as at last, at least in some small part, his regrets were being laid to rest.He leant against the battlement, resting his arms on the walls, working hard to seem casual and unseeming; but he was pleasantly surprised at how easy it felt to be in Zelda’s company again. They stood in silence, soaking in the sun, until Zelda placed a hand on Link's arm."Would you like to talk about what happened, the other night?" She asked quietly. "We might not get a chance, after we depart."Link swallowed, fighting to keep his air of ease. "Oh! Well. I’m sorry if it was… kinda sudden," he said, not quite believing his words. "Not that I minded, but if you minded…” He trailed off, suddenly uncertain. "Um. I don’t know where I’m going with this.”Mercilly, Zelda smiled. "Why would I mind? As I remember, I invited you into my study, in the middle of the night. I knew what I was doing. Though you started it, with that thing you did with your mouth."Link felt a thrum of warmth in his belly. That thing he'd done. It was a dream now, the boldness of it a mystery; lips against her bare thighs, but closer, and closer, and closer… He couldn't think what had inspired him, but the way his name had caught like a breath in her throat had been a reward in itself."I just..." he began. Zelda was looking at him expectantly, so he searched for something to say that wouldn't sound foolish, but ultimately gave up. "I liked it."She laughed, high and musical, and Link felt all of the tension leave his shoulders. She moved closer, and when she spoke next, her voice was low and rich. "I did too," she said, intertwining a hand in his. "I'm sorry it wasn't somewhere… nicer.""It was plenty nice," Link grinned. He gave her hand a concerned squeeze, feeling the roughness where callouses were beginning to form, as a terrifying thought then entered his mind. "So. You’re a Princess…”“Yes…?”“And it’s okay that we did, right? Since we’re not, you know?”She looked at him in silent disbelief. “What? Married?”Link threw up his free hand. “Yeah! I guess!”She groaned, squeezing his hand in return before bringing it to her chin, lips pressed against the knuckles. "Let's please not worry about that now. Let's just do what makes us happy. We can sort out what's proper when I really do have a crown on my head. But first is finding Cinelgen, and finding your friend."Link looked back out from the battlements, his eyes settling on the flat mesas and longline cliffs of Gerudo, unhappy to be reminded of Inglis' dire situation."Then that's what we'll do," he said, more to assure himself than her. "Wherever they are."The lethargic roll of their oar boat lulled Inglis of Akkala from his feverish sleep. The first thing he felt was not the heave-ho of the rowers, not the pain in the right side of his head, not even the soft and gentle voice above him, cooing platitudes and apologies, wake soon, sweet Inglis, forgive me, please. No. It was the churning of his stomach that signalled to Inglis his survival, as well as the faint memory of how much he hated ships and hated water. But he was glad to wake with Milagre above him and his head cradled in her lap. A throb of pain at his right side made Inglis reach for his face, where he found a damp bandage. A laugh caught in his chest; Aurelia would never let him hear the end of it if she saw him. I am as blind as you are deaf. He could hear her voice. He could hear her teasing him. Inglis looked where he could, and drifting past he saw the rain soaked banks of Hylia River and the mist-laden trees of the forests beyond."Are you in pain?" came the husky voice from above. Milagre was smiling down at him, hair frizzed from the rain, face pale, a little bloodied still. He tried to speak but the words came out as croaks, and she shushed him, leaning down to kiss his brow, the side of his face, the corner of his lips. "Never mind. Sleep, sweet Inglis," she said, and wrapped in her arms he almost did, until a burst of red caught his eye.A flame against the dreariness, Cinna's hair hung limply about his head, the colour nearly snuffed out by the rain and mist. He was wrapped in his velvet cloak, crouched at the bow, ruminating."What happened?" Inglis finally managed to mutter. He remembered… fighting. And then falling. A Beast in the sky and waters below. The rest was blank. What had happened at the Castle? Was Link okay? Where were they? Milagre ran a hand along his cheek."I should not have turned on you," she sighed, her nose pressed against his. "Perhaps then you would have fought harder. Fought for me.""What happened?" Inglis repeated, squirming, kicking, boots clunking against the wooden floor of the boat. Cinelgen turned, and the crew shifting around him, as if in avoidance.Milagre frowned. "Your friend won, sweet Inglis. And he hurt you."Link? Inglis winced at the pain in his ear, the memory returning. A glint of steel, a wide blade. Link's blade? He could hardly believe it but the memory was there. The Knight before him, in a tunic of blue and white, roaring as he brought his sword across Inglis' ear."I'm sorry. For everything," Milagre said, pushing the hair from his eyes, her grip the only thing abetting his shock. "But I'm here. Cinna is here. He saved you, helped you escape. And now, we will always have each other."Inglis shivered, clinging to Milagre for support. Cinna had moved to sit beside them. "On the road again! Just like old times, hey?" he said. "We're not far, just a few more days south."The Gerudo's green eyes practically sparkled, but Inglis saw the melancholy beneath. Wildness and abandon were what drove Cinna, but with no focus it would break him, Inglis knew, sending him spiralling into himself. He forgot his friend's crimes then. He wanted desperately to save him."I'm sorry, Cinna," Inglis croaked. "I'm sorry it came to this."Cinna's grip slackened, but his facade did not break. "I never wanted that Castle, anyway. We should have burnt it down!""That's what I said," Milagre scolded. "We should have left nothing for that Princess.""Heading around a bend!" one of the rowers called, and the boat began to sidle in towards a muddy shore, banking sharply against the current."Well, I don't envy her," Cinelgen admitted. "The throne was not a fun place to sit. It made me paranoid. Fearful." He ruffled Inglis' hair and then stopped to adjust his bandages. "I'm not angry, you know. I wanted Link's friendship too. And you only went to him because of how we treated you."The Gerudo reached an arm around Milagre and pulled her into a solidary embrace. "Well, no more. We're a family - a trio!""Get off," Milagre whined, playfully pushing herself free. "You're insane.""I was!" Cinna laughed, grappling her back, holding them both tighter. "But I think I'm done now.""We could go back," Inglis said, suddenly hopeful. He looked up and saw their smiling faces, wanting to capture them somehow. "We don't need to run anymore. If you surrendered, if you admitted-"Cinna's face fell. "They'll kill me.""You don't know that."There was no telling if Inglis was right. His right temple throbbed again; it had to have been an accident. Link could not have hurt him. Not deliberately, or without cause. Hadn't they been friends? All of them? Wasn't that the only thing any of them had wanted? He did not want to go to Karusa. He wanted to go home.The boat shook as it rolled over a swirling eddy, the rowers heaving their oars through the water to push through the turn. Cinelgen barked an order, and soon the boat was back on course."Link would accept you," Inglis said. "I know it." He expected to be dismissed once more, that his ideas and thoughts would be ignored as so often had been.But that laughing smile flickered again on Cinelgen's lips, and he hummed. "Perhaps he would."Down the line of horses, the goggles were passed. From the ridge of Nephra Hill in the Gerudo Highlands, far away enough to remain hidden, Link, Zelda and the Gerudo surveyed the siege of the Geldarm Bridge with the aid of Robbie's Sheikah goggles. Link recalled crossing it when it was still under construction, and he recalled the pride with which Buliara had described it to him. A bridge of solid sandstone to connect Gerudo Canyon and Gerudo Desert with the rest of Hyrule. But all it was now was a site of war...Link and Zelda had travelled through Central Hyrule with the Gerudo to the their Highlands, unable to cross the Geldarm Bridge itself. They had stopped a while to survey the siege and chart its progress. The results were grim.The Zora spanned the entire north side of the bridge and its surrounds; two dozen tents, numerous fires, rows of weapons and shields, ready to be seized for battle. The Gerudo camp was by comparison barely a camp at all. A handful of tents, guarded by stakes and wooden barricades of felled palm trees, arranged like rows of jumping jacks. Activity on both sides was sparse, aside from the patrols of Zora warriors and Gerudo guards alike."As you can see, we are in a precarious position," Riju panned, her chest heaving a long sigh. "If Sidon cannot reclaim his throne and tell them to leave, they never will. And every day they move further across."Link's horse shifted anxiously, and he ran a hand through its mane. No need to fret, he wanted to tell it, but could not shake the familiar, impending anxiety. Another standoff.Rhoamet stood at his left, watching the scene below with a vacant eye. Zelda sat atop her horse on his right, the goggles in hand. "Larella and Sidon should be in Zora’s Domain soon. It’s only a matter of time until they can order the Zora armies home. And we will find Cinelgen, and show the world what he has done," she decreed.Builiara did not seem placated. "And if you cannot do these things? What then?""I don't know," Zelda admitted. "But we will adapt. Link and I have become masters of the art."The Knight turned researcher. The Princess turned warrior. That didn't seem right to Link. He wasn't just a researcher, nor was Zelda just a warrior.There was no time to ponder further. Below the Zora on the bridge shifted forward, and the Gerudo on the far end sprang into action. They raised their golden bows in warning, but no arrows were fired. The Zora did not move. From the ridge, the scene was a diorama; a performance, in a state of constant intermission."I almost want them to fight," Riju said. "Get it over with. Tears us to pieces. But let us die, at least.""They could have," Link said bluntly. Heads turned in his direction; half a dozen pairs of eyes, and one - Rhoamet sat ready, eager at the sound of his master's voice. "So, why haven't they?""They mean to cut us off, starve us, punishment for our actions towards their envoy," Buliara explained. "But the Gerudo can endure alone. It is the fear that strangles us."Riju echoed her bodyguard's concern. "Someday soon, their patience could run out," she mused. "If Sidon cannot become King. If Cinelgen is nowhere to be found. It's all I can think about."The little Chief's desperation was unsettling, not in the least because it was justified. She had always seemed so in control – even with Vah Naboris threatening her city, or with the Zora at her gates. But she was time worn, now. A wind hewn cliff face – once bold, crumbling now to reveal the fine sands beneath.Zelda sensed Riju's anxiousness. "Would your people feel more secure with their Divine Beast returned to them?" Zelda asked. She had drawn the Shiekah Slate from her belt, a schematic of Vah Naboris on the screen.Link leaned in his saddle, neck craned to better see the screen. He had meant to ask Zelda if he could borrow it to perform a diagnostic on Rhoamet."The Gerudo would be very appreciative of such a gesture," Riju said with bowed head. "You would require Buliara to pilot her, no?"A look passed between Zelda and Buliara then, and even from the far side of the group Link saw the bodyguard's gaze that struck him as maternal. She nodded, and so Zelda answered, smiling down at the little Chief."Not Buliara, no."It took another two days for the party to travel through the harsh Gerudo Highlands, descending Mount Nabooru and re-entering the desert at the Gerudo Desert Gateway. Their progress was slow, though thankfully the onset of spring alleviated the snowfall. Curiously, the Gerudo had not much more than cloaks to ward the chill - their usual silken, light-cut clothes unchanged. Where Zelda shivered, the Gerudo seemed almost aloof to the cold, their heads perched high, as if they could look down their noses at the very weather. When asked, Riju put it down to Gerudo hardiness."My people are survivors, suited to the harshest of conditions. More so than any other race. This cold will not kill us, so why baulk?"Hardiness was indeed what they needed. The desert seemed even more brutal than before. When they passed Kara Kara Bazaar, they found it abandoned; its traders having packed up and moved into the city.Once they reached the town gates, Link took the Sheikah Slate and teleported to Vah Naboris, where she was still sat with the sandstorms of the south. He was still her inducted pilot and could march her back to the outskirts of Gerudo Town where Zelda, Riju and Buliara would meet him.In return for their aid with Vah Naboris, Riju offered Link and Zelda a royal apartment each within the palace of Gerudo Town - which they sadly had to turn down."There's no time, we need to make haste to Karusa," Zelda said as they approached Gerudo Town, frowning inwardly. She had been looking forward to a night in a warm bed. And perhaps, a night not spent alone."Of course," Riju nodded.While they waited, Riju convinced Zelda to at least enter the town to rest, and recuperate in preparation for the Cleansing Ritual. The streets of Gerudo Town were nearly as empty as Kara Kara, with only a handful of stalls open, and barely any goods stocked."Little Chief!" an old crone called from her stall of charred and ageing looking meats. "Little Chief! Another day without news?"Riju spoke gracefully, though her clouded face betrayed her fury and shame. "None, Danda! But soon, by the Heroines!"The crone spat, her voice shrill as she whined. "Again! Are you a Chief or a mouse, when will you drive them back? How long before they storm our city? How can we trade with no customers?"Buliara broke from the group of returning Gerudo and reached menacingly for her dagger. "How can you talk with no tongue!?" she hissed. "Remember to whom you speak!" The woman spat again, but fell silent.After a tense afternoon tea of chilled Hydromelon juice taken in Riju's throne room, a guardswoman finally signalled that Vah Naboris had been spotted on the horizon. Zelda, Riju and Buliara sped along the dunes to meet the Beast, pulled each by a dutiful sand seal - Zelda was surprised to find she had not lost the knack for it, remembering the training Urbosa had put her through just to keep her from falling each half a mile. You just need a strong core, she had always said. The rest is instinct after that. Let your muscles do the work that your brain cannot. So many teachings. No wonder she had begun to forget. As they skirted through the sand, Rhoamet followed happily some way behind them, and Zelda was impressed at his ability to keep pace, marvelling as his long, segmented legs hopped across the shifting dunes.Once Vah Naboris had been lowered to the ground, Link disembarked, greeting them with a wide and happy wave, before stopping to wipe the sweat from his brow. In the meantime, Rhoamet had walked himself around to the front of the Beast, and was looking up at its flat face. He was blinking something, a series of patterns that Zelda could not quite read. Sheikah Code, but too fast for her to understand."What's he saying?" she asked Link.He approached his Guardian and squinted, eyes hard as he focused. "No… i, n… No infantry, zero.""'No infantry zero'?""That's what he's saying," Link shrugged. "It's a new one.""We had better get to work!" Buliara called from the entrance. "High noon approaches. Soon it will be too hot to remain outside!"Zelda gently nudged Link towards Naboris' curved double doors, and they went with Riju and Buliara to the main control unit at the centre of her cylindrical inner chamber. As if by habit, Link drew his sword and held it out for Zelda, the blade pointed down, and his hands wrapped tight around the hilt."Just like old times," he grinned as she placed her hands over his. Zelda closed her eyes to begin the ritual.Eerie similarity; that sense of emptiness. The void where time would be. She was here again, and the voice confirmed it;"Ah, Princess, you return."Zelda opened her eyes to darkness - pervasive and pressing against her, making an other of her presence. The Master Sword was in her hand, and there was water at her feet; a shallow pool, ink black and viscous as honey.Looking ahead, she met with the uncomfortable glare of the woman. Her mirror image. The fragment."Just as I knew you would," the woman went on."Just as you knew…?" Zelda asked, aware suddenly of how cold the air was here. There was a strong breeze too, as they stood high atop some mountain.With a long sweep of her arm, the woman gestured around them. "Ancient magics dwell here. This is a place rich with time. That once made it sacred."Zelda looked around, open eyes trying to latch onto some form or familiarity, but there was simply nothing to see. "You told me that memory dwells here," she said. "But I don't see anything. At all.""Then perhaps we need a little light," the woman offered. She raised her own right hand and tapped where the golden symbol would be. Cautiously, resting the sword in the crook of her arm, Zelda unfastened her glove and revealed the mark on her hand. The light it gave off revealed the sights around them; two pillars of stone flanking a pedestal, and a long walkway leading up to it. Around her, the sky had begun to brighten, tinged gold and purple, as though an eternal dusk beset this place."See?" The woman approached the pedestal, her long hair and wafty white dress flowing like water behind her. "Much still remains. The memories most of all."Zelda followed. "Memories? Whose?""Everyones. The history of Hyrule flows through here," The woman placed her hands on the pedestal, gazing down at it with great intent. "Those that created this place knew the power of time and of memory. It is all here. Every possible you and every possible him. We can find them all. Would you like to sail the seas? Fly through the skies? Walk through walls or run like a beast? Or perhaps would you like to recall– wait, no. That one is in your future."The woman's words were dizzying, as was the beauty of the realm around them. Zelda remembered then where she had been before; with Link, and Riju and Buliara. This place was folly, as bewitching as it was. She had real problems to deal with, back where time flowed, and the skies were blue."How do I know this isn't a dream?" she demanded.The woman sighed. "I knew this would happen. It always does. But I prepared something just for this. You are on your way to Karusa Valley?"Zelda nodded."Then watch carefully. Forget nothing. And understand the power this place contains."Zelda opened her mouth to protest, but the woman disappeared, and so did the light in her hand - it was usurped, torn from beneath her and replaced by the swaths of red earth and black sky, as well as the taste of dust in her mouth.She was stood atop a thin, winding valley that jutted into a wall of cliffs, lit only by torchlight. All around her were watchers; bandits, in blue and white neckerchiefs, crouched low at the edges of the valley walls. "This is Karusa!" Zelda cried out, but her words were unheard. And this must be a vision, then.Scanning the scene, she saw the Yiga Hideout just beyond. A cacophony of shouts rang out, and Zelda watched with open mouth as, from the Hideout entrance, Cinelgen came running, dressed in tatters, his face bloodied. He brought two fingers to his lips, the whistle echoing against the earthen walls, returned by a long blare from a horn. On his heels, appearing from every direction were Yiga, with curved sickles and dark red garb. But with the horn blast, the bandits around her jolted into action, loosing arrows down into the valley. The Yiga fell, and those that found their way atop the valley were soon overwhelmed. Some of them stumbled, moving sluggishly, almost clumsily, and Zelda realised; they were drunk! Inebriated and surprised, the Yiga stood no chance.She ran along the valley edge, towards the entrance of the Hideout, passing through the bandits of the vision. Reaching the entrance, she saw them; the spear-wielder, Milagre dressed in draped formal garb, and the Hylian Inglis. They stood close, hands intertwined, until the Yiga woman departed back to the Hideout, and Inglis took off into the valley.The rest of the vision was almost unfathomable; what seemed to be a group of four Yiga Elders burst from the Hideout with Milagre at their backs. One tried to flee, but Milagre cut him down. The rest were executed one by one with an arrow from Cinelgen's painted bow. When it was done, he, Milagre and Inglis rounded up the youngest Yiga and marched them out of the valley."A massacre," came the woman's voice. "The day the Yiga Clan all but ceased to exist."The vision of the valley fell away, leaving Zelda in darkness once again, except for the blinding white light as the woman appeared before her."When did this happen?" she asked."You are not far from Karusa now, Princess," came the answer. "Go, and see, and then return to the bridge the Gerudo have built. They are in danger."Zelda did not understand, but she did not ask. She had seen enough. Bringing the Sword to her chest, she prayed that she would soon wake.Vah Naboris was crouched once more, this time by the side of her city. Following the Ritual, Riju had been quickly inducted as pilot, and with a childlike eagerness, she had led the Divine Beast towards the south face of the city. Even sitting, Naboris towered over Gerudo Town, casting a long shadow across the walls.The return of their Divine Beast was not the only gift Link and Zelda had for the Gerudo, however. Link had been thinking of ways to bolster the new Champions - to unite them, as was so desperately needed. Matching scarves would not be enough. They needed to feel as though they were part of something elite, something with greater cause, and he remembered then his powers - or more accurately, the previous Champions' powers."Before we go, Lady Riju," he had said, catching the Gerudo Chief at the entrance of Vah Naboris. He cupped his hands to his chest. "This belonged to Lady Urbosa. Naboris' new pilot should have it."Focusing, feeling a hollowness metered out from within, Link pulled the power forward, until it was collected in a luminescent ball between his hands.With shaking fingers, Riju reached forward, the light of the power dancing in her almond eyes. "This was Lady Urbosa's?" she echoed."It was her fury," Zelda said, her brows slightly furrowed. "A click of her fingers and the storm was hers.""And now it's yours," Link told the still gawping Chief. "A powerful gift of unity between Hyrule and Gerudo."With a small bow, and the approval of Buliara, Riju pressed the shimmering light into her chest. Her eyes went white as she startled backwards, her breath hitching. Buliara moved to catch her, steadying hands at her shoulders. But Riju quickly recovered, and when it was done, she raised her hand and snapped her fingers. She squealed with delight as a barrage of static filled the chamber, crackling the air. Vah Naboris warbled in response. Was it approval, or disapproval? Link could no longer hear the Beast's voice."Now, you may dream about being Naboris, but that's normal," Zelda explained once they had disembarked. "The Sheikah Technology and the induction process creates a link between you."Riju passed a lingering look up along Vah Naboris' long spine, towards her impassive face. She was rubbing her hands together, as she had been since she'd received the power. "And what of Naboris' abilities?" she asked. "I've been subject to her electrical pulses before, but what about-""Those pulses could be useful, by the way," Link interjected. He had returned to Rhoamet's side, and was checking his segmented limbs for dust and sand. "They power her inner workings. I bet we could reroute it, somehow. To power pumps, or some kind of motor..."Zelda agreed, her eyes lighting up at the prospect. "Electrical power, yes, that would be brilliant!"The Chief's eyes narrowed. "Perhaps. But I have two dozen Zora at my doorstep. What do I do if they breach the Geldarm Bridge? I need Vah Naboris to protect us!""And she will!" Zelda assured her. "The Zora will never dare approach the city with her here. But you can't actually use her firepower."Riju was adamant, her decision already made. "There may come a time when I have no choice."Link and Zelda stared incredulously at the Chief - at the child before them - who was openly suggesting wielding her Divine Beast as an instrument of war. Behind Riju, Buliara approached with their sand seals. When she saw their downcast faces, she frowned, understanding immediately."Riju, if you attack the Zora with Vah Naboris, they will retaliate with their own Beast," Zelda said sternly. "You cannot do this.""Sidon can’t be far off. We have to trust him,” Link added. “He’ll call his people home as soon as he can.”The little Chief looked to her bodyguard for backup, but Buliara gave her nothing more than an authoritative scowl."Of course," she conceded, her anxious hands dropping to her sides, though the commitment was feeble. "But by the Heroines, waste no time in finding Cinelgen. Someone must pay, for all of this."The openness of the desert brought a welcome peace. There was nothing between them but the searing air, the roll and yaw of the dunes, and the sand seals they had been gifted to help pull their supplies. Rhoamet marched behind them, both a protector and a pet.Mercifully, the sands towards Karusa were wide and flat, and their hike was easy. By day they walked, talking little to conserve their strength, and by evenfall, they spoke and sang, told jokes and counted stars. Zelda read from her father's journal, recounting for Link the stories of his reign; the failed endeavour to open the Knight Academy to races beyond the Hylians, the overthrowing of a tyrannical Goron boss, the crisis of succession in Zora's Domain, the rise of magic in Gerudo Desert, among other things."Is there anything of my father in there?" Link had asked, and to both their dismay, they found nothing. Zelda herself could not even remember the man Link's father was - not even a name. Another memory lost to time.And by night, they slept in each other's arms, fending off the chill of the desert, building a sanctuary between them that the rest of Hyrule could not reach. Link sought her lips in the dark, and Zelda relished in the comfort and simplicity of it, his mouth marking a slow journey down her neck. It stirred a new warmth within her, just like that night in the study, and she allowed herself to chase it - hands roaming over and under fabric, searching. Exploring. Learning.And that boldness of the first night returned, inhibitions gone, her senses filled with nothing but the gallery of stars above and the electric, ecstatic pulse that coursed through her. But when they came close - Link's hand between her thighs and his murmur in her ear, do you want to - she said no. Not here. Not as vulnerable as they were. Not while she still shook with fear at the task ahead of them. Link did not pout, or complain, achingly at ease as he whispered, being here with you is more than enough.The next day the flat cliffs of Karusa Valley finally rounded over the horizon. Zelda was flicking through the compendium in the Sheikah Slate, trying to remember if it was Warm Safflina or Cold Safflina that grew in the desert when Link suddenly placed a warning hand on her shoulder."Do you hear that?"His body was tense, eyes closed as he concentrated. Around the toe of her boots, Zelda sensed the sand begin to shift.It was quiet at first, the rumbling. Like blood through veins; soft, constant. It grew, creeping underfoot at the edge of her conscience. Something's coming. Soon more sand began to shudder, and then there was no denying it. Something's coming! And the rushing grew louder, and stronger, and the ground shook, the sand bursting forth until like a flood as the sound of it washed over them and Link shouted,"Molduga!"They sprinted for their sand seals, grabbing their packs and leaping onto their surfing shields to flee. Rhoamet followed as fast as he could, but gradually lost pace as behind them, great boughs of sand from the Molduga beginning to erupt forth in pursuit. Zelda gave her tether a hard whip and winced at the sting against her fingers, fighting to keep her balance, while Link rounded to the right and sailed back towards Rhoamet."He can't keep up!" he cried. "And he's the heaviest thing here. We need to get him somewhere safe!"Passing a fearful glance over her shoulder, Zelda spied the moving mound where the sand contorted - where the Molduga was closing. Rhoamet's five spindly legs flailed near helplessly as the sand fell away beneath him, his clawed feet not designed to traverse the unsteady ground at such speed for so long.The sand crested, and then dipped, and they raced down along a sloping valley."Over there! Up ahead!" Link was shouting, and Zelda saw a pair of low, rocky mesas at the base of the valley. They were small enough to climb but big enough to be a refuge, each sprouting a handful of arcing desert palms."Can you hold him off?" Zelda called to Link, sputtering against the sand that flew into her mouth. It was blinding, battering her eyes, her skin. Link however, seemed in his element. He was winding and weaving, whipping at his sand seal's tether, trying to create enough movement to draw the Molduga away from Rhoamet.He held out a hand. "The Slate!" he said, cutting left behind Rhoamet.As quick as she could, Zelda unlatched the Sheikah Slate, and lobbed it towards him, nearly losing her footing as she shifted her weight. Link banked towards her, catching it effortlessly with one hand."What are you going to do?" Zelda shouted.Without answering, Link worked the Slate as they continued to race towards the twin mesas, and between his palms came forth a luminescent bomb, its light essence trailing behind in long lines."Head to the Mesa!" he said. "I want to try something!"Doubling down on her tether, Zelda called for the Guardian to follow while Link pulled back. The shallow in the ground that marked the Molduga's presence was gaining again. In a swift motion, Link threw the bomb onto the sand, circling around where it had landed, and not a moment later the Molduga changed course."Rhoamet!" Link shouted. "On my signal!"The Molduga exploded from the sand, launching itself high into the air. Zelda caught the shadow as it careened overhead, wobbling again as the slope flattened. She watched with open mouth when Link thrust the Slate forward, and the Molduga froze in a burst of yellow light."Now!" Link roared. Mechanical, methodical and skidding as he halted in the sand, Rhoamet turned his round head back around and arced himself up towards the Molduga that was still mid-air. After a moment to aim, he fired; once, twice, three times, three beams of energy directly into the suspended creature. The Stasis on the Molduga broke, and it soared out of view, crashing down back into the sand at such a distance that Zelda could not even see it.At last, they reconvened at the base of the mesas; Rhoamet had climbed them despite there no longer being any danger. Zelda leapt from her shield, and raced into Link's arms, laughing and cheering."That was amazing," she said. "You two are amazing!""Thank you," Link grinned proudly, giving her a quick, exultant kiss before climbing the mesa to Rhoamet's side. "I'm just glad he's safe."Once they had recovered, they began to re-orient themselves; but the task did not take long. Their flight down the slope had led towards the cliffs at the edge of Gerudo. And less than half a mile beyond, splitting the wall of the bluffs like a blemish was a long, was a thin valley, the walls pressed in close, adorned with red flags. It was as it had appeared in the vision, bleak and uninviting, a crevice in the known world.Link announced their arrival: "Karusa."With wary steps and vigilant eyes, the trio of the wild - Link, Zelda, and their Guardian - made their way into what turned out to be an empty valley.Despite what they presumed, Cinelgen had not come to Karusa. Not a single soul had in months. All they found were the dead, and the unseeing frog statues that were the valleys only residents now.The further they pressed, the more corpses they met - most were completely rotted, their flesh shrivelled and desiccated, splitting to expose bone bleached white by the sun. But their clothes and their weapons identified them clearly enough. The red and black of the fabric had faded into pastels, and some of the weapons had begun to rust."Yiga, all of them." Link frowned, kneeling before one of the bodies. He wrapped a hand around its wrist, peeling back the fabric and exposing a small, barely visible red tattoo. "They've been dead for months. He spoke of this. He told me he did this. I didn’t believe it but it was…"A massacre, Zelda realised. She had begun to shake, taking in the grim scene in stunned silence."Cinelgen did this," Zelda said. The woman's words returned like thunder; the Gerudo are in danger. "The vision… the vision was real."As if in a trance, beset by a premonition of looming tragedy, Zelda began to ran back towards the valley's entrance. Link was calling after her, but she didn't slow."I will explain as we travel," she shouted over her shoulder. "We need to reach Riju!"Just like old times.Their camp was built before evenfall. They collected driftwood that washed up on the shore, leaving it to dry on the sand, harvesting bracken from the banks, and soon the fire was crackling in the twilight, Hyrule Bass browning above the flames.Lake Hylia stretched out around them, vast as a sea against their little camp, and the Bridge of Hylia loomed overhead.Faron was where Cinelgen had led them, determined to lay low and keep out of sight. They purchased horses, built tents. They fished, built castles of sand, and destroyed them with the heel of their boots. In the quiet, they lived.The mists that hung above the lake and the rains that followed them to Faron had tempered Cinelgen's flame into embers, his fervour all but gone. Inglis was hesitant to say he had simply given up. Cinelgen had always seemed to be working on something, but now he passed his time idly. Perhaps, having tasted both victory and failure, he was at peace.Wishful thinking. Inglis knew the Gerudo better than that."You're biding your time, aren't you?" he asked one evening."A little bit of peace can’t hurt," Cinna shrugged. "We have long lives ahead of us. Another opportunity will arise."They sat together by their campfire as night descended over the lake, each picking at morsels of roasted fish. At the shore, Milagre was washing her hair in the lake. Inglis peered through the smoke of the fire, gaze passing between Milagre in her water-soaked clothes and the cliffs above. Cinelgen changed the subject, musing over the omens of an early spring between bites, his painted Duplex bow in his other hand, nails tracing the chips and marks it had collected over the years.As Inglis listened, he spotted a figure on an outcrop beyond the camp, and his heart almost stopped; there she was. She was dressed in red and black, a Yiga mask covering her face, her white-gold hair flowing in the soft breeze. When she took off the mask, she glared at them with a single searing eye. One by one her followers appeared on the outcrop, and together they descended into the camp. It was not long before Cinelgen noticed, raising his eyes from the fire to meet them."Ah, Aurelia," he crooned, his arms thrown wide. "You found us!"The scowl on Aurelia's face told Inglis that she was not here to rejoin their band."Why are you still here, Inglis?" she said coolly, ignoring the Gerudo's welcome."You know, Aurelia," Cinelgen went on, standing from the fire. "I didn't see you the day of the battle. You hadn't fled had you?""I had," she said matter-of-factly."But not to Karusa?" Cinelgen asked. "That is what we'd expect.""And what I expected of you," Aurelia surveyed the camp with a discerning eye, counting their meagre number and provisions. "Even with nothing left they still follow you. Kings could not hope for greater loyalty."Cinelgen revelled at the compliment. "I saved them, simple as that.""Is that what they believe?" Aurelia implored. She looked to Inglis, whatever hint of friendship they shared now gone. "Is that why, Inglis? After all you did, you went running back to his side?"Inglis was ready to argue until he heard the hurt in her voice. Milagre had appeared at his side, still wet from the water. She was seething, Aurelia's presence an affront."Get out of here, Aury," she hissed. "Take your people and go.""My people?" Aurelia cried. "They're your people too, Mila. But you're too obsessed with power to remember," She gestured to Cinelgen. "Your king murdered our people. He murdered my sister!"Milagre was unaffected by the accusations. "Cassiah died on the road," she said authoritatively. "Two weeks before the attack on Karusa Valley. You know this. I read you the report.""You expect me to believe that? That my sister was killed by the Hero of Hyrule? She would never fall in combat, but an ambush on the other hand! She returned the night of the massacre, I saw her corpse as you marched us out of the valley. Hunted like game!" Aurelia's voice wavered, the weight of her grief breaking her at last. "I did nothing, for too long, out of fear. But no longer. I have come to take the Yiga home."One by one, the bandits began to grumble and murmur."Ganon is gone. A Princess sits in Hyrule Castle once more. It is time for our people to seek a new way, and this man cannot give it to us!" Aurelia beseeched the others of the camp. "He destroyed Karusa. He destroyed the Yiga. He fled Hyrule Castle like a whipped dog! There will never be peace with him!""Aurelia, don't—" Inglis began. Beside him, the telltale signs of Cinelgen's temper had begun to show; that deep scowl, a tightened grip on his bow, the drumming of his fingers, ready to fire. He didn't want them to fight; couldn't bear if either were to hurt the other…One of the Yiga – a gangly young man, with a withered figure - stepped forward to approach Aurelia."I want to go home," he told her.And then followed another, and another. Inglis recognised them as Yiga, born to Karusa. They were the acolytes and civilians left behind when their bladed brothers and sisters had been killed in the massacre. They un-threaded their scarves and let them fall to the sand.But Cinelgen just laughed! Wheezy, sardonic; the laugh of a man both in control and quickly losing it. "Let them go!" he said. "I don't want to fight.""Don't mock them," Aurelia spat. She reached for a curved sickle at her belt. "I know you. I know what you would do. And I owe that Champion a debt - I will repay him by ridding the world of you.""And what I would do?" Cinelgen crooned, amused by Aurelia's rage."You already massacred my people. What is another village to you? Another town? I watched as you wreaked havoc and I did nothing. No more."Cinelgen sighed. "If that is what you think of me, then that is what you will get."The light was catching in his eyes. Aurelia's accusations were oxygen to the flame, and in that moment Inglis could have sworn he felt the course of history change.Gone was the hope for peace. Gone was the hope for rest. Aurelia had reminded Cinelgen of who he was.He reached for his bow, loading an arrow in an instant and firing it towards Aurelia. She dodged, lightning fast, and the camp erupted into chaos. Through the shouting and the brawl, Cinelgen raced for his horse, Milagre in tow. They mounted, kicking up sand as they fled along the beach."He's leaving, let's go!" some of his followers called, mounting their own horses.Inglis found his own horse tethered by his lean-to and watched as Cinelgen's followers retreated, with Aurelia's giving chase.He had a choice, he realised. The first choice he had been given in months, maybe years. To let them flee, to mount his horse and ride as far as he could away from Faron and from Cinna; or to chase the Yiga - and to chase his friend.Inglis deliberated no longer. He made his decision and mounted his horse.The scene that met Link and Zelda at the Geldarm Bridge was one of inaction – thought it was tense, measured, ready to break at any moment. Zelda hoped in vain that the woman had been wrong. The Gerudo are in danger, she had said. That much was true. The Zora number seemed to have swelled in size, and even now Zelda spied more arriving from the north. They were fortifying. Preparing.The only activity at the Gerudo camp however, was a caravan of wagons approaching the bridge, carrying large crates and barrels. Provisions, Zelda presumed. Riju had returned to her post at the southern edge of the bridge. She was watching the Zora as she had been the first time Zelda had met her here; with stony eyes, and heavy features. On the other side of the bridge, a Rito courier departed from the Zora camp, with a large satchel strapped over his shoulder."No word from Sidon. And more Zora arriving by the day," Riju sighed as they approached, appraising them with polite, if somewhat forced smile. "We heard that Karusa was abandoned. Cinelgen has escaped us again.""We have to keep faith, in Sidon at least," Zelda assured her, and Riju hummed, her eyes returning to the Zora camp. Once, Zelda would have buried the anxious thoughts that came then, but now she let them have their time; you equipped Riju with her Divine Beast, the voices of her conscience whispered, you provoked the Zora into bolstering their forces.“Buliara estimates the Zora will try to cross in less than a week. She has asked me to return to Gerudo Town, where I can be safest. But I am Chief, aren’t I? I have to protect my people.”Zelda’s heart raced, alarmed at the rapid escalation of the siege. Perhaps if she went to Lanayru, to convince the Zora to halt their advance. Perhaps even if she spoke to the Zora on the other side. “They would never attack you directly, they couldn’t–”“Who can say,” Riju murmured. "Anyway, where will you go now?" she asked, a strange finality to her voice. "Where do you think Cinelgen could be?""Necluda," Link answered. "We need to go where travellers go. If he has been seen, we will find out."“And from there, Lanayru, to aid Sidon if need be,” Zelda said.The Chief nodded wordlessly. “I just hope he keeps his promise.”“Until he convinces the Zora council to crown him, he is helpless,” Zelda reiterated.“I know. But we only have so time,” Riju said. She signalled for the guard, her movements laborious. Zelda was about to ask what was wrong when Riju began to speak again."I want to apologise. I was foolish to want to use Vah Naboris for war, and I swear to you I will not," She spoke as if reading an epitaph. "I just hope you understand. My people have been persecuted across the ages for legends in which we play the part of the villains. I would do whatever I could to protect them."Behind them, a Gerudo guardswoman was approaching, a small package in hand."We understand," Zelda said."It's a hard time for everyone," Link added.The guardswoman stopped to bow before them, and placed the package into Zelda's hands. It was a small tin, painted in black and gold brocade."A small gift of thanks, seeing as you could not stay," Riju said, turning, at last, to give them an apologetic smile. "I have negotiated with the Zora that you shall have passage. Despite everything, they remember your names."After exchanging their final goodbyes, Link and Zelda became the first to cross the Geldarm bridge in months. Soon the desert heat began to recede, giving way to budding grasses and the colour of spring.Walking alongside her horse, Zelda popped open the tin and took in the sweet smell of the lacquered treats. Tucked among the folds of paper, she noticed a small slip of parchment, rolled into a scroll. Gently, she tugged it free and found a neat, cursive writing on the paper.
I'm sorry.
She froze mid step, spinning back towards the Geldarm Bridge. Without a word she mounted her horse, kicking it hard down the path."Hey! What are you doing?!" Link shouted, mounting his own horse to give chase.She didn't know what she would do when she returned. She didn't know what she could do. Maybe if she were there, whatever Riju had planned would not happen.She reached the Zora camp and leapt to the ground, pushing through the soldiers until she broke through, and the Geldarm Bridge came into view.And there the little Chief was, alone, her right hand raised and fingers drawn together. Two rows of the crates Zelda had seen had been rolled out onto the bridge, and to her horror she now realised they were marked in paint with black Xs. Riju startled when she saw Zelda but did not let her hand fall. I'm sorry. Zelda could not imagine the little Chief writing those words. It was the universe itself apologising to her then."Get back! Get back!" Zelda screamed, clawing at the Zora around her, trying in vain to pull them backwards, and behind her Link finally broke through the crowd.They exchanged a fearful look and sprinted out to the edge of the bridge. But neither was fast enough. Riju clicked her fingers, and the whole valley shook.First from the lightning that struck the bridge.Then from the explosive barrels that burst forth a shockwave of flame and debris.And lastly from the sandstone that shattered beneath their feet as the Geldarm Bridge began to crumble.
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
The eastern flank of Mount Granajh was transformed from a barren wall of clay and ochre stone to a site of endless activity. The best and brightest of the Sheikah had masterfully combined their talents to estimate that something of great size was buried beneath the earth there, and so their workers had been tirelessly excavating the mountain since.
Zelda had travelled for three days to see the dig site and regretted that she had to do so without informing her father. She simply could not resist seeing the wonder they would uncover, and would face whatever punishment or harsh words would be coming her way for it.
She did not expect to find the Chief of the Gerudo waiting for her however, at the grasslands opposite the mountain, and considered turning her horse around the moment she saw the formidable and intimidatingly statured Urbosa on the horizon.
“Don’t worry, your father didn’t send me,” Urbosa laughed when she caught sight of Zelda’s mortified face. “I have come to see what these strange men will find beneath our lands.”
“You mean the Sheikah?”
Urbosa hummed, a disapproving scowl on her face. “Is that what they’re called? Their insignias remind me of an ancient enemy.”
Zelda gasped softly. “The Yiga? They’re real?”
Urbosa threw her head back in another sing-song laugh. “Oh, little bird. You have so much to see of the world, if only Rhoam would let you.”
Urbosa returned to watching the excavation, a hand on her hip, her face hardening again. “I shouldn’t feel ill-will towards these Sheikah, I’m sure they can’t be as bad as the vagrants in Karusa Valley!” She looked down at Zelda, sensing the question about to be asked. “The Yiga recruited one of my own personal guards. Turned her against me, used her to try and attack me! And then she got away.”
“That’s horrible!” Zelda said. “What… what will you do?”
“Nothing, little bird. My friend made her choice, and I would gain nothing from my vengeance,” she ran a hand over Zelda’s fine gold hair. “But you need not worry about such things.”
The sagely Gerudo Chief looked one last time towards the dig site, to where the form of something gargantuan was beginning to be unearthed from the stone. “In any case, I sense we’ll soon have greater wars to wage.”
The aftershocks lingered for days. Thwarting tongues. Scattering soldiers. The Zora shrugged through their shock, asking each other that inescapable question. Why stay?No one had been killed by the destruction of the Geldarm Bridge, but those closest to it nursed lacerations and cuts that formed a crosshatch, Link and Zelda included. Her partner did what he could; healed those who wanted to be healed, muttering platitudes and soothing words."You'll go home soon," Link told a Zora warrior he was attending to, and Zelda hoped that his words would come true. Somewhere, in the glistening interweave of Zora's Domain, she hoped that Prince Sidon would soon find his crown, and call an end to this rabid conflict. He has Larella with him, she reminded herself, hoping the notion would calm her."Home..." ruminated the Zora warrior, flexing his arm now that it was healed. "What I wouldn't give to see the Domain! I should be thanking that crazy little Chief." Laughter rounded the small group of injured Zora waiting for Link's attention. Praise little Riju, they snickered. We can finally leave this stupid valley.And so it seemed that the Zora sent to siege Gerudo Desert garnered no hate for their opponents. They, like everyone in their flotsam of a kingdom, just wanted a recess from it all. All this conflict, all this chaos; all it needed to be ended was for everyone to agree that it was pointless. But how could one argue that something was nothing and that nothing meant something?Zelda had found her father’s journal invaluable in times like this. The situation has become too complex, he had written of the Goron Civil Crisis which gripped Eldin in the years before she was born, my presence will not untie this particular knot.The Goron Crisis was a long story, but the lesson was clear; sometimes retreat was the only thing left to do. With this in mind, Zelda set herself three tasks while Link continued his healing.First, she sought out the commanding officer of the Zora, a wide-stanced and ageing man named Seggin who looked affronted that the siege dare be over. She found him barking orders at no one in particular, grasping steadfast onto the last of his command. With a polite bow and a firm voice, she told him his soldiers were weary and many in need of respite, or their wounds would worsen."Chief Riju only wanted you to leave. I do not believe she wished to harm you," Zelda added.“But she did!” Seggin spat. “Pah! Destroying her own bridge! She must answer for this!”“I will see that she does,” Zelda said, not sure how to make that promise a reality. “But for now the siege is over. There is no longer a bridge to capture.”Seggin agreed to consider her suggestion only because he recognised her as the Hylian Princess, and recalled how she healed Divine Beast Vah Ruta. Royalty always gets what they want, he had muttered under his breath.Still, less than a day later, he did as she had advised, and once he raised the prospect of returning home, his warriors were so amiable to the idea that the camp had begun to pack up within an hour.Next on her list of tasks was to find that Rito courier, and send an urgent letter to Larella, and another to Hyrule Castle. She found one lingering at the camp's edge, his pack already full with messages bound for the Domain, each warrior sending his kin the same news; I'm alive.Zelda's letter was not entirely different; The Geldarm is down. Destroyed by Chief Riju. The Zora are retreating. Cinelgen still missing. Link and myself unharmed. Be vigilant.Link offered to translate it into Shiekah Code for security, until Zelda pointedly reminded him that he was one of only fiving people living who could easily read it (their ageing Shiekah allies being the other three). He took that in his stride, stopping his healing to pull out his notebook and complete the task regardless."Did you plan for an attack on the bridge in that red book of yours?" Zelda teased, but Link did not recognise the jape."I had, actually," he frowned, flipping determinedly through the pages. "But I thought it would be instigated by the Zora."“What do you think they’ll do next?”“They can’t retaliate,” Link answered. “There’s no safe path into Gerudo anymore, and even if they got Sidon to attack with Vah Ruta…”“Vah Naboris could strike back just as hard. Hylia help us if it comes to that.”And thirdly, she wrote one more letter, to be delivered by any traveller that they could find at the Outskirt Stables willing to cross through the Highlands and enter Gerudo. An unlikely prospect, but one she could improve by promising a handsome reward. One hundred rupees? Maybe three hundred? Whatever the price, she needed Riju to read the words;
Should you need assistance rebuilding, we can offer aid. But eventually, you must atone for what you did here, for the sake of your people. Lady Urbosa once said to me that fury is like fire. A tool, a weapon, a defence; but fury, like fire, consumes.
When she was done, Zelda saw that the line of Zora wanting to heal had grown short, and soon after non-existent. Their camp was almost entirely consolidated, folded neatly into packs and wagons, the ground where they had been undisturbed - as though they had never come. It was strangely uneventful, almost disappointing. An arduous siege that was the culmination of months of civil unrest, ending suddenly like shutting a book.Zelda found Link already having packed up their things once more, as eager to leave as she was. With a curt farewell to Seggin, they departed ahead of the Zora, leaving the carnivorous Gerudo Desert - the place that consumed plans and intentions like dogs to a rabbit - behind once more.The heat followed from the valley; Spring had come to Hyrule in the form of sun-filled days, swarms of flowers, and the almost petulant, persistent hum of dusk bugs and the hawking wildlife, calling forth the change of season.The humidity made Zelda a little dizzy. Not hot enough to induce abandon. Not cold enough to harden her skin into a shield. And the rain. The rain. Pressing down against the earth, infiltrating through woollen sleeves, single droplets caressing her neck, flattening golden hair made muddy-blonde against her scalp. This was the Hyrule that greeted them as they rode once again along the cliffs of the Great Plateau.In the interim between the desert and Necluda, they made camp at the Outpost Ruins. Dusk found Zelda huddled under a ruined shack, her father's journal clutched against her chest, while Link practised his swordplay in the rain. A familiar scenario, she realised, but a happy one now. She had urged him to stop - to rest, lest he catches a cold, to come sit by her side - but he explained just how long he'd had spent so much time cooped up in narrow cells and dark arenas, with his Sword half a world away. He wanted to move, stretch his soul, hear the song, and so she sang while he danced, her father's journal traded for her golden harp, and they made music between themselves under the rising moonlight.Rhoamet too began to dance, pacing through the rain. Chasing butterflies or patrolling, it was hard to tell. Link had performed another diagnostic on him with the Sheikah Slate and found strangely little. Rhoamet was uncorrupted, but all other readings were scrambled. What information the Slate gave them was useless. Serial numbers. Unreadable code. And a single repeated and recapitulated phrase.No. Infantry: ZeroOnly now it had punctuation; now it made sense."Number of infantry, zero," Link had read aloud. "A count of soldiers? Why would he be keeping track of that?""And why report it to Vah Naboris?" Zelda had added.More scribbling. Link had reached the last page of his journal, and so seconded Zelda’s Sheikah Slate to make more. He'd been taking photos too, documenting; Rhoamet's segmented legs, his ceramic looking body, the pattern of his swirls and markings. A habit carried over from when he'd started using the Hyrule Compendium to catalogue the beasts and bits of nature that he came across.The Slate was still at his belt now. Zelda had forgotten to ask for it back, so dedicated to reading her father’s words. It suits him, she mused. The blue matches his eyes. It bobbed and bounced against his hip as he moved, hooked neatly by the clasps fastened to his side.As she watched Link practice, plucking idly at her harp, Zelda thought on the words of the Deku Tree. They boomed in her head, as though he were not fifty yards behind her. Have you considered, Princess, he had asked her, what it means to hold all three? The three triangles; the Royal Crest. She had thought the riddle to be referring to her power. He had told her that generally, it would split, and seek out those who embodied those virtues of wisdom, courage and power. But it hadn't in her. She would have thought herself to be wisdom if any of the virtues. And surely Link most embodied courage? Is that not what he was, in mind and soul; courage's own manifestation? But the Sheikah Slate at his hip and the Guardian dancing at his side told a different story; something far less reductive. Something that would normally be lost to legend; hazed in the passing of time.Soon he rejoined her at the fire, unbuckling his sword and belt, lifting his tunic over his head to wring it dry over the fire, his undershirt still soaked through and clinging to his chest. Zelda looked upon this sight and smiled without thinking, two words wafting into her conscience like beacons from a watchtower. He's mine."Feel better?" she asked. Link nodded, chest heaving. Behind him, Rhoamet was still waltzing to his own tune."What about you?" he asked, re-shirting and sitting down at her side. "That business in the desert--""Would have broken us both, six months ago," Zelda interjected. "But here we are. Pressing on as we always do."She was about to reach for him; to pull him in close so she could feel his warmth and take in the smell of rain on his skin, and maybe make him discard that shirt of his once more, when in the distance, she caught sight of a figure veiled by the downpour. A Hylian, atop a weary horse, trudging along the path from the south. They were on their feet in a second; Link with his sword drawn, and Zelda with her Sparrow bow. They stood side by side, ready to meet the newcomer.But out from the rain, the only person that emerged was Inglis.Soaked and grumpy, a large bandage wrapped around his head, he stared down at them for a long moment before bursting into laughter. Zelda could only watch as Link joined in, sheathing his sword and meeting Inglis beside the horse to give him a strong-armed hug. Though it was hard to tell in the rain, Zelda thought for a moment that Inglis was weeping with joy."What are you doing here?" he cried. "Don't you have a Castle to run?""We were looking for you," Link shot back."Surely not," Inglis smiled. "I'm not Gerudo."He turned to Zelda, bowed low, and offering to take her hand in his, he said. "A pleasure to finally meet you, Princess."He and Link are of a kind, she thought, taking his hand and curtseying in return, sensing the gentleness to Inglis that she had long known in Link. Yet, he had still been Cinna's confidant, she reminded herself. And she remembered seeing his face in the vision of the Karusa Valley Massacre. Father would call me a fool for trusting him.Inglis recounted his journey as they settled in for the night, letting Link heal the grisly wound on the side of his head where his ear had been severed; Cinelgen had fled to Faron against everyone's expectations, but Aurelia had found them, and in the chaos, Inglis had escaped.Link's ears had pricked at the melodic name. "Aurelia is alive?""With a vengeance," Inglis grinned. "She took the rest of her Yiga from him."Aurelia the Yiga. Link had not spoken of her; indeed this was only the second time Zelda had heard the name. Who are you, she wondered of the faceless woman.They sat around the fire, passing between them the bag of wildberries that Link had picked on his way out of Gerudo. Inglis spoke with heavy features, and the thick, unmistakable accent of an Akkalan, his voice strangely lumbered for someone apparently set free, "I don't know where Cinna is now, and he could have gone in any direction.""Lurelin Village is the nearest settlement in Faron, but Hateno is the closest town," Link pondered, the dim light from the Sheikah Slate reflecting in his eyes as he examined its map. He looked up at their new companion. "But you know Cinna, would he really make for the nearest town?"Inglis bowed his head between his knees. "Cinna's harder to read than ever. He has something planned - he's biding his time, but for what, I don't know." He sniffled, wiping his nose on his sleeve and lifting his head to gaze into the flames.Link passed Zelda the bag of wildberries, and returned to scanning the map in the Slate. Zelda saw the difference then, that which divided the boys before her. Link's eyes shimmered with purpose, something having been unhindered within him in the months that they were apart; Inglis' were lost, drooped from fatigue. When he blinked, he flinched."Thank you for telling us all of this, Inglis," Zelda concluded, passing him the wildberries. "You’ve told us where we must go next. Hateno is a traveller's hub. If he has been seen, we will find out."The arch of the Duelling Peaks pressed in close overhead as they led their horses towards the swamp that preceded Fort Hateno, and soon the ephemeral stream that they walked along widened into a river that followed the bordering hills, leading eastwards into Hateno.The hooded travellers at the Duelling Peaks Stables would otherwise have paid them no mind - happy to hide out of the rain and wait for night to fall by their fires and within the thatched walls. But wide eyes reflecting humming cerulean lights greeted them instead, as did the open mouthed gasps and muffled shouts. Guardian! Guardian! They cried, and they scrambled and made such as fuss that even Rhoamet seemed to sense their hostility.It wasn't until Link managed to get ahold of the Stablekeep and explain who the party were and what Rhoamet was that the commotion finally began to die down."You'll get this everywhere you take him," Inglis commented as he rubbed down his horse, and unstrapped his saddle bag. "No matter how many times you explain."Link was unphased, focusing his attention on soothing his unsettled Guardian by running a steady hand along his ceramics. "Then I will explain, as many times as it takes. He's an important part of our history.""Perhaps there are others," Zelda mused as she worked her own horse, adding, "That survived, I mean. Robbie said the rest were dead.""Robbie," Link repeated, happening upon a forgotten thought. He nodded, feeling the idea catch. "Robbie might know."They had settled their horses in the barns behind the stables tent, and just beyond the line of trees that gathered around the boundary was Blechery Plain, the swamp that was the final place of his former life. Rhoamet had turned to survey the area, and soon was marching off towards the piles of now long-deceased Guardians that littered the plain."Hey, hey, no," Link muttered, following his Guardian, but Rhoamet did not hear. Soldier-like, he made his way into the swamp, his Hylian companions following on foot.In their journeys so far, they had yet to come across many deactivated Guardians; the only ones Link could remember were a small handful in Hyrule Field, the dead guardian in Lanayru Wetlands, and the one in Deep Akkala. But there were more here. Many, many more. Worse, Link recognised these ones. They weren’t just deactivated – these were the Guardians that Link and Zelda had killed, on the day of the Calamity. This is where I died too, he realised.Rhoamet carefully approached the slumped body of one of his old comrades, staring silently. His head whirred to examine the Guardian next to it, and then again to the pile resting against a partially collapsed wall. When Link, Zelda and Inglis finally managed to reach him, he was padding circles on the grass, taking in each of the many dead that surrounded them. And when he finally turned to Link, he repeated that same phrase.
No. infantry: zero.
"I know, buddy," Link whispered. "They're all gone. I'm sorry."
Infantry down.
"I know–"
Retreat.
Link started. "W-what?"
Regroup: HC.
"Link - what is he saying?" Zelda asked. He focused, trying to understand. Retreat. Regroup. New phrases."He's giving orders," Link realised. "Like he’s in charge of these ones.""In… charge…?" Inglis murmured, and Link nodded, stepping slowly towards his Guardian."He's not just a soldier. He's not just a Knight," he concluded, watching as Rhoamet continued meandering through the swamp, blinking furiously down at the decaying old foot soldiers beneath him. "He's a captain of a guard."Like I was, Link thought as he reached Rhoamet, and climbed quickly onto his shell. Perhaps the Goddesses brought us together then.There was nothing more they could do for the Guardian. Link led him away from the swamp - back to the safety and oblivion of the Stables - and as they walked, he wondered if it was cruel somehow that Rhoamet had survived where the rest of his kin had fallen.Three golden arrows made quick work of the marauding Moblins as though they were no greater threat than Chu Chus. Zelda shot one through the eye, and the other twice through the heart, giggling proudly to herself when they fell.It was the most exciting thing that had happened in their entire journey into Hateno, and Link was finding it difficult to remain awake in his saddle. He tried to focus on the chatter between Zelda and Inglis - they were discussing the operation of the Sheikah Slate - but his eyelids were like lead, his muscles water and his fingers numb from the icy cold of the morning. The Necludan valleys brought turbulent winds that staved off the onset of summer, just when Link was beginning to think that winter might finally be over.It was well past noon when they finally made their way into Hateno, taking a southern path to avoid the main town. Too many people there - as adamant that Link was that he could soothe the people on Rhoamet's presence, he had no wish to quell an entire town. And he had not slept the night before, his mind filled with the realisation about his Guardian, hence his drowsiness even with the afternoon sun high and hot overhead.As always, Rhoamet followed silently by the side of Link's horse, though the party had needed to stop more than once due to the Guardian becoming stuck between the tightly grouped hillside trees."He's caught again!" Inglis would call, shaking Link from his stupor. Once, in the haze of his own sleepiness, he had replied,"He's not caught. The trees are in the way."If Link was half-asleep before, Inglis and Zelda's laughter had awoken him then. He grumbled, disliking feeling so sluggish. Zelda had not slept either, yet she was sprightly, almost antsy, and then he remembered; she hasn't been to Hateno in a hundred years.She had sat at the foot of his bed at the Stables, conversing with him almost the entire night as they unthreaded what they had learned about Rhoamet. It is hard to theorise with what little information they had, but this is what they had decided; Rhoamet looked like a regular Guardian Stalker, if a little smaller, but he was something like a…"Nodal activator," Zelda had said. "Or something like that.""Excuse me?" Link blinked, feeling as though she had spoken a foreign tongue."We know from tapestries and limited research that the Guardians used swarm tactics, you saw it for yourself during the Calamity," she explained. "One can imagine each Guardian as a node in a network, but perhaps occasionally there would be an activator, to detect and evaluate new threats, and to coordinate with the Beasts, or maybe even us.""A commander," Link offered, thinking of the soldiers he had led at Fort Hateno. Or the nodes, as Zelda would call them."Exactly."If he admitted it to himself, Link felt a little chuffed. His Guardian was smarter than the others. His Guardian was a leader. But still, Link was troubled, unable to shake the notion that Rhoamet no longer had a purpose. That he should have been long dead if the Goddess was kind.They rejoined the main path and led Rhoamet up along the steep hill towards Link's house. Inglis had already parted to head into town, and inquire at the inn for any word of a fiery-haired Gerudo man and a bed for the night. When he'd asked if Link and Zelda needed rooms, Link had cheerfully informed him that the answer was no."I have a house here; we'll sleep there." He'd cast an askance glance at Zelda, riding along the path at his side, and wondered with another flutter of glee if he would sleep alone.The trio would regroup in the morning; Link and Zelda would pay a call to Purah at the Hateno Ancient Tech Lab, and with the information that Inglis had found in the town, they would make their next decision on how to act. For now, Link could think of nothing he wanted more than to rest - to have an evening off, at last, in his own home.Zelda stowed their horses in the bays by the house, while Link explained to Rhoamet that he could tap on the window if he needed anything. "Just say my name, buddy, and I'll be there." Rhoamet gave an affirmative, Okay, Link, and tucked himself in under the tree by Link's house, his flickering lights fading as he entered what seemed like a low-power state."Does he sleep, truly?" Zelda asked, but Link could not answer with more than a shrug.The inside of Link's Hateno house was endearingly unchanged, save a small amount of dust that had collected on the furnishings - and a new fireplace that was tucked into the far corner, an invoice folded up and left on the mantle. It, too, was gathering dust, and was now long overdue, Link saw. Bolson Construction Company read the fine lettering at the top of the parchment. He folded the paper quickly, ignoring the exorbitant price of the fireplace, and turned to see Zelda standing silently in the middle of the room, her hands tucked across her chest and her eyes wondrous and wide."Do you like it?" Link ventured. "It's not much, I know.""It’s nice! But it's… strange," she said. Her eyes passed over the weapons mounted on the walls, over the neat kitchen and half empty bookshelves; she climbed the stairs and laughed at the framed pictures sitting on Link's dresser, chiding, "You'll need to find something more interesting to frame," and then returned with a vase she had found by his bedside, containing a now long dead flower."Strange?" he asked her."It’s just odd being here, I suppose," she answered, plucking the flower from the vase, and emptying the water into the basin in the kitchen. "Not staying in an inn, or a camp, or a castle, but a home.""Perhaps we're not the settling types.""Maybe we can be," Zelda went back out into the yard, setting about plucking a handful of wildflowers for the vase. "Just for one night."Knights! cried his father’s voice. Link had to bite his lip to stop from gasping. You know nothing about them. You will never be good enough to be one of them!He stood in frustration, unable to think or move as the cruel words drifted through his mind. Why was there no face, no name, only a voice? Who had his father been?Cold ceramic between his palms re-woke Link as Zelda handed him the vase - now full of yellow flowers - and returned inside. As he watched her go, Link decided that when he re-entered that house, he would not open it for a single thing. He would forget the war; he would forget Cinelgen, he would forget the voice. When the sun had set there would be nothing but blackness around them, and no Hyrule to speak of. He would find his rest - mind, body and soul - with her and no-one else.Link stepped into his home and shut the door.The eyes fell suspicious upon Inglis as he walked into Hateno's premier establishment, a modest but somewhat cramped public house tucked in behind the town's inn. It was mid-afternoon, hardly the time one seeks a drop of wildwine or Akkalan ale, but Link and Zelda had sent him into town to search for news. He figured drink made storytellers of even the most mousey travellers, and here was where the drinkers came. If he found nothing, at least he'd have an interesting tale to pass on to his Hylian companions.With head bowed, he approached the mantle of the bar, sliding himself into one of the tall stools. It rocked under his weight, the legs poorly balanced, and for half a moment Inglis imagined himself careening over backwards like an idiot. Get yourself a drink, he told himself. Calm these nerves.He ordered a mug of mulled wildwine and scanned the room. Half a dozen faces. The liver-spotted barkeep with a chequered apron spooning the aromatic wildwine into a mug; a pair of young men a few barstools over, both in travellers clothes, though the one facing him was wearing what seemed to be a soldier's tunic; an older couple, man and wife, sitting by one of the yellow-tinted windows, splitting flower seed pods with their teeth and chewing the seeds like a cow to cud; and a Rito the colour of wetted ground leaning by the door and sipping from a large flagon of what looked like cocoa milk, probably resting before a journey home. Where to start. How to ask. Yes, about 6ft high, maybe higher, and Gerudo, yes! I'm just wondering how far he got! When we parted ways, he said so little... Inglis shook the wayward words from his mind and accepted the mulled wine from the barkeep, tossing a handful of rupees onto the bar. He turned to the young men, who had been arguing in low tones ever since Inglis had walked in."I know you don't want to go to the Castle again, but don't you think that's the most likely place they'd be?" suggested the man in the soldier's tunic.His travelling companion huffed, and Inglis recognised his accent then as that of a northerner. Of an Akkalan! "Nell, friend, I do, I really do," the northerner muttered. "But… but—hic—I just… surely you understand?"Inglis took a sip of the wine, feeling the warmth of it trickle down his throat and flower in his stomach, and emboldened, he cleared his throat."Pardon, pardon me if I'm intruding, but are you two travellers?"By the look on his face, the northerner recognised Inglis' accent in turn. But his glare was intense, a sudden fury fading into surprise. Before Inglis could speak, he realised he recognised more than the man's accent.Granté of Akkala smiled wide, "Inglis! You're alive! And here, in Hateno! What are the odds?""Quite high, where else would he go?" the soldier interjected. He looked to Inglis, nodding. "Apologies for my friend, we're travellers, alright. Name's Nell," he extended a hand for a firm handshake and gestured limply to the northerner. "This one's Granté, though I see you've met.""We have," Inglis nodded. He met Granté's vivid eyes, quietly wishing now that he had never come to the bar at all. "You're looking well," he managed. "Better.""Pah," Granté waved away the assessment. "Sheikah genes. We're a little stronger than your lot."By now, the rest of the patrons in the pub had turned to watch the reunion. Inglis sought an excuse to leave, but all he could find to say was, "W-what are you doing this far south?"The Sheikah leaned in close, and when he spoke Inglis could almost taste the alcohol on his breath. "Father received word at the lab that Zelda took back the castle, so Nell and I volunteered to come south to seek her out," he explained, patting his chest where there was ostensibly a hidden pocket. "We've got proof and that. Only when we reached the Castle she wasn't there, so we went to Kakariko - and ah, it was nice to finally see my ancestral home!""Aye, likely because of that pretty girl you met," Nell teased. "What was her name? Some kind of fruit, I think.""Now, listen," Granté whirled around to point the finger at his friend. "I said I'd write to her about my travels and nothing more." He spun back around, a little unsteady, and it was then that Inglis noticed the trio of empty glasses by the Sheikah's side. "Anyway, anyway," he slurred. "Then we came here, in case the Princess decided on a diplomatic mission or something."Inglis wasn't sure if he should tell them the truth, and if he did, how much of it to tell. He decided against telling them anything; after all, Zelda likely wanted to keep a low profile."Well, I haven't seen her," he lied, hoping the pair hadn't seen the quiver of his lips.Both Hylians sighed in unison. "She'll turn up," Granté conceded, his face crestfallen for less than a second before he grinned again, throwing his arms wide, "But you should come back with us - to Akkala!"Inglis almost stumbled backwards then. What a prospect! "I can't… there isn't anything there anyway.""That's where you're wrong!" Granté informed him. "Akkala Citadel welcomes you!""Akkala… Citadel?" Inglis repeated. "That ruin?"The Sheikah boy looked as though he might have built it himself. "For sure! Some great magic a few months back cleared it of its corruption. Some folks from Tarrey Town were working on restorations all through the winter. Most of our population are refugees of the war, sadly, but they were glad to host them."Inglis could hardly believe it. Some great magic; that sounded exactly like Link and Zelda's doing. They had restored Akkala Citadel! His father had told him stories of that place as a boy and the legend of the last stand of the Knights of Hyrule, but… but now it was more than a legend.
You cannot. You have a job to do. You must not stray.
Inglis took a long sip of his wildwine, and then another, willing the ferment to take control. "I'm sorry, friends, but I have to decline," he said, feeling a trickle run down his chin. "I have my own work here."Granté and Nell watched in a confused silence as he bowed, placed the half empty mug back onto the bar, and sped from the pub.They supped on soup and bread that Zelda had purchased at the Duelling Peaks Stables and sat with full stomachs by the warmth of the new fireplace. Zelda had discovered to some excitement that her powers could ignite wood, and soon the flames were roaring in the hearth. She was poring again over her Father's journal, reading on the failed expansion of the Hylian Academy. Voswann tells me change is inevitable, Rhoam had written. Why does the Goddess deem it to be so difficult? While she read, Link rested his head in her lap, the flickering light of the fire dancing on his still features. His eyes lolled open periodically as he passed between asleep and awake, until at last he rubbed the sleep from his eyes and sat up to gently stoke the fire."You've been a little quiet today," Zelda said. "Thoughtful, I mean."For a moment Link pondered her words as if searching for a way to dismiss her. But finally, he said, "It's just...coming here, with you, has brought back a new feeling to this place. Well… not new." He sidled in next to her, leaning a head against her shoulder. "Old.""Old?" She shut the journal, laying it down on the floor."As though this is the oldest place I know," Link answered."Perhaps you came here as a child."It was the simplest explanation, really. Link agreed. "I must have. Or maybe… maybe I was born here," he gestured to the house around them. "Maybe this really was my home."Zelda looked around the room once again; a humble enough home, too humble for the son of a Knight, surely. Link would have been raised in Castle Town, with the rest of the children whose families were in service to her father. "Are you sure nothing else brought this on?" she asked, wrapping an arm around his shoulder. He reached across to her thigh and pulled her legs onto across his lap, snuggling her in close."Link, talk to me," she urged and felt him sigh."I've been hearing my father's voice," he eventually admitted. "Ever since I arrived at the Castle. I've been hearing it again here, this evening at the house."More memories; more ghosts. Even here, their entire world was a graveyard. "I wish I had known him. I might have been able to help you…"Link wheezed a soft laugh. "I don't think you'd want to. His voice is… harsh. It keeps telling me I'm not enough.""Not enough? What does that mean?""I don't know," Link half-growled, his frustration gnawing beneath. "All I can think is, what if my father was right? I thought, with Rhoamet, for a while, that maybe I could be more than what I was. I thought I helped him by freeing him-"She ran a hand through his hair, and soothed, "You did."Link shook his head, the fine strands of his hair weaving between her fingers. "All I've done is distress him. You saw his reaction to the field of dead Guardians."Zelda had, but what she remembered was the way Link had calmed Rhoamet with little more than a gentle hand and whispered words. "Do you want to talk about it?" she offered."No," He raised his eyes to meet hers, giving her a quick kiss along the line of her jaw before saying, "I don't want to talk about anything at all."And so, turning to catch his lips with hers, Zelda ended the conversation. "Then let's not talk," she murmured in his ear, unravelling herself from him and standing with a hand outstretched. When he took it, she led him up the stairs to his loft - to his bed in the corner - though in truth they barely managed to make it, kisses fevered and hands straying."Let's not talk until morning," Link added, and after that, they said nothing but each other's names.
In the moonlight, they count their scars.
Three for the Princess; one, on her right shoulder. Another on her brow. A third on her leg, perhaps gained in Hebra, or Gerudo.
Countless for the Knight, on his back, on his arms, torso, legs, hands. Endless origins; endless causes.
They count scars and trade kisses, planting them where they both have been hurt. Soft lips to heal. Warm hands to soothe. Discovering parts of each other forgotten; uncovering stories in the jagged lines of once broken skin.
Beneath the blankets, alone in the world, they let the scars be scars and nothing more. They feel for where it hurts, and where it doesn't. Where touch brings hollow pain and the fullness of pleasure, creating something hungrier; a demand, for each other, for everything. And it's better than it was in that study. It's better than anything ever has been. Sometimes they laugh when it's awkward, and sometimes they tremble when it's too much.
But together, when it is done, Princess and Knight know that if they gather more scars, they will not do so alone. They know, no matter how many scars they collect, they will re-meet here to count them again.
For such an extraordinary place, the Hateno Ancient Tech Lab was impressively unassuming. The only thing that marked it as anything but another one of the stately old homes of Hateno was the curious blue flame burning in the teardrop shaped furnace by the door. Zelda inspected it while Link tied up their horses, holding a hand to the fire."You can go in without me," he said, turning his attention now to Rhoamet, who had planted himself next to Zelda and was also examining the flame.Zelda said nothing at first, instead chuckling nervously to herself. When Link placed a hand on her shoulder, she let out a long held breath and finally said, "Reunions! They never get any easier.""Well, you know she isn't old old like Impa," Link said. "Though careful you don't laugh."She drew her hand back from the flame, frowning haughtily. "I won't laugh. Purah's condition is a highly intriguing scientific phenomenon and more importantly a sensitive medical issue," she clicked her teeth. "Honestly, Link."But when he pushed open the double doors and led her into the workshop, and when a bright little girl of six turned with an excited expression to greet them, Zelda practically squawked. Her squeal - part laughter, part shock and part childish delight - filled the research lab, and she turned so red from embarrassment that Link half thought she looked sunburnt."Well, there she finally is," tutted the Sheikah researcher. "One hundred years and one years late, but you are royalty after all," Purah leant forward, hands on hips and bright red eyes shining, speaking as though dispensing ancient wisdom. "The party starts when you say it starts."The hint of sugar in his tea was a welcome, if small, pick-up. Link drank deep, finishing his first cup long before anyone else. Zelda offered Symin a sweet thank you as he refilled her cup, and then Link's, but Purah was not so impressed."Carefully," she scolded. "If you spill any and burn either of these children, I'll have you rewriting the ledger again!"Fear flashed in behind Symin's round spectacles, and he gave a quick bow before scurrying away. Purah took a short sip of her own tea and returned to her thoughtful pause for a long, silent moment. They sat around her workbench, drinking Hyrule Herb tea and munching on shortcakes that Purah had apparently been saving. After a little while longer in thought, she eventually said,"If this...Cinneygen had been here, we would have known. Even isolated as we are. After all this nonsense between the Zora and Gerudo, the Hylians are on alert for any who aren't them. Especially the kind that only shows up once every few generations.""Gerudo males are that rare?" Link questioned. No wonder he thought himself a King."Oh, yes," Purah affirmed, stirring another sugar cube through her cup. "I can’t even remember the last time there was one. Though I wouldn’t be surprised if records of Gerudo males were suppressed. They still have a sore spot over that King of Thieves of theirs.""Rightly so, Purah," Zelda said sternly. "It's the first story anyone learns about the Gerudo. They're always fighting it.""Yes, even now. Else there would not be this war," Purah sighed, planting her cup back down into its saucer with a dejected clink. "Such an immense waste."Zelda finished her cup once again, determinedly this time, and spoke softly, "We will find him, that I promise you. So long as Cinelgen lives, he is a threat to Hyrule… and to my throne."Purah gazed at her, and Link thought he saw the researcher shake her head. "Well, well, look at you then. Hardly the troubled young girl my sister wrote to me about," She stood from her place and walked along the bench, taking Zelda's face into her hands."Impa would tell you to persist, I would tell you to abandon it all and sail west! But I see, you have your Father’s look about you. I know what you will do, Princess," She sat back down, and sipped again from her tea. "Uniting this place will not be easy, I'll say that. Leading it? I wish you luck!"Link watched Zelda's expression change, shifting from haunted grief at the mention of her father, to a strange peace and stillness. She smiled."That reminds me, Purah, if you'll grant me my leave," Zelda said, standing from her chair and nodding towards Purah's assistant. "Could Symin introduce me to the mayor?"Symin walked Zelda into the town while Link remained to introduce Purah to Rhoamet. While the researcher lamented that she did not know as much about them as her colleague in Akkala, she was thrilled to meet with the first uncorrupted Guardian since her youth ('Well, since my first youth, technically').Zelda found the leader of Hateno in one of the Hylian Rice fields, his face shaded by a wide hat, and a long farm hoe in his hands. He worked a row of earth, tilling and planting. His name was Reede, and he was tall for a Hylian, with lush brown hair and a full beard.He listened silently and nodded slowly as Symin explained who they were. When the assistant was done, he bowed again to take his leave. "Forgive me, Princess," he said. "Doctor Purah has asked me to look today at her finances and...well I hope you can understand."Hiding a knowing smile, Zelda allowed him to go and turned to Reede still working the soil."So, you took control of Hyrule Castle, are you really the Princess then?" he said in a voice as steady as stone.“If you can believe it, but yes.”"And you’re Link’s friend? He lives just over the river.”"I am," Zelda said slowly, unsure of what to make of the man. "If you have time, I've come to discuss the future of Hateno."Reede laughed. "That almost sounds like a threat!" He lowered his hoe, placing the head on the ground and leaning against the pole. "But you do look the part. My grandmother told me stories of the Princess of Hyrule. Golden hair and green eyes, in royal blue regalia."Zelda looked down at her clothes, glad she had chosen her old blue and gold clothes for the occasion, and not the simple Hylian tunic and Rito coat she’d become fond of.“Mayor Reede–”“Please, just Reede will do.”“Reede. I'd like to rebuild Castle Town and the roads around it. Hateno is currently the largest settlement in Hyrule, but it is also one of the most far flung settlements. Creating a central hub would facilitate trade, speed up travel and-""Take passers by from our town," Reede countered with a grin."I– Well, that would not be the intent," Zelda said. For a second she felt a tight coil wind through her stomach, but she took a deep breath. She could not expect this man to trust her immediately. "I would hope safer roads would mean more travellers.""Oh, to be sure. And you would maintain those roads?” He angled the poll of his farm hoe towards her, a casual but pointed challenge.“I suppose, yes. It would be my duty, as monarch.”“And then must we pay taxes to you and your crown? Send men to fill your armies? Escort your trade wagons?” Reede argued. To her horror, Zelda caught sight of Link approaching down the hill towards them “Forgive me, Princess, but we have survived for one hundred years without a Royal Family. It will take a little more than some nicer roads for us to support you - ah, Link! There you are."Zelda turned to Link and tried to smile, but her face would not move. She almost felt sick, having been so succinctly rejected. I thought I was getting better at this.“How are you, Reede?” Link said.“Glad to see Spring,” the Hylian answered. “I was just meeting your friend, Zelda. She lives in the Castle, yes?”“Sure does,” Link said, casting Zelda a nervous sideways look. Everything okay?Zelda sighed inwardly. “Thank you for your time, Reede. If there’s anything you or the people of Hateno need.”Reede lifted his farm hoe from the soil, and readjusted his hat as he gave her one last morsel of advice: “Princess, take it from a guy who never expected to be responsible for more than his crops. If you want to lead, then lead. People will follow once you do that, and not before. Show your strength, and they simply come to you.”With a short bow to both herself and Link, Reede then bid them good day and turned back to his work, humming as he worked the soil.Once they were out of sight of the town – standing by the pond next to Link’s house – Zelda placed her head in her hands, "Well, I honestly don't know what I expected. Pledge your town to help some random woman! Of course he'd laugh in my face.""Well, he didn't give you an absolute no," Link soothed, placing an arm around her shoulders."I know. I know." Zelda did not want to whine. "He was right, anyway. We have to prove ourselves."Link chuckled. "I think we’ve already begun."Zelda raised her head to look at him, and noticed for the first time laugh lines on his forehead and cheeks, betraying the first days of the end of youth. What would she do without him and his casual wisdom?But before she could remark on this, Inglis came bounding across the bridge to their house, waving his arms. "There you are! I looked all over for you!" he cried. "I have news!"Link and Zelda turned to receive the Akkalan marching towards them. "Have you been to Akkala Citadel?" he practically demanded."Yeah, a few months back," Link answered. "Why…?""It's been re-opened!" Inglis beamed. "All that purple stuff was cleared out, and now people are living there!"Zelda's hands slowly dropped from her face as she took in the words. "People?"Inglis pointed to the inn, urging them to follow him back into town. "You gotta talk to these guys. I met some travellers, some Akkalans who-" and just as they made it over the hill towards the inn, they saw two young men were exiting it, laughing and chatting jovially between themselves, their packs strapped to their backs. Zelda recognised one as the soldier's son they had met at the Citadel, and the other as a Sheikah."Some Akkalans?" laughed Link, waving the travellers over, and soon all four were again exchanging hugs and pleasantries, with the Sheikah taking a short moment to bow before Zelda when they approached. He ruffled Inglis' hair, grinning, "You scoundral! Keeping them from us!"The soldier's son introduced himself as Nell, recalling the day they had met on the East Battlements of Akkala Citadel, and the Sheikah as Granté of Akkala, Robbie's son."Robbie's...son!?" Zelda half cried, struggling still to picture any of her Sheikah allies as anything but their younger selves. "Of course! You...you look so much like him!"She forgot Cinelgen then, and she forgot her disastrous meeting with Mayor Reede. As Nell and Granté began to explain the works at the Citadel, her eyes flashed, filled with the visions of the kingdom she could build.It was just as Link said; they had already begun."Surely for someone who'd stand out, he'd be easier to find!" Nell plonked his tankard down on the rough-grain wood of the table outside the public house, the dark ale slopping about the rim."We've only been looking for a few weeks," Zelda countered.Another dead end, according to Inglis. No one in town reported having seen anyone even remotely like Cinelgen.Link, Zelda, and their three Hylian companions had decided to hold a strategy meeting over a shared pot of crab stew and a jug of ale, though Link could not find a liking for the bitter drink. He and Zelda shared a glass of apple juice instead."Something Reede said has been stuck in my mind," he piped up once there was a lull. "'Show them your strength, and they'll come to you'."Zelda looked wounded by the words, the disappointment still new. "What do you mean?" She said in a small voice."Cinelgen wanted the Divine Beasts under his control right?" Link began, addressing the table. "There's one Beast we haven't visited yet."Inglis' eyes went wide, and he let out a disbelieving puff. "You want to go to Eldin, again?"Link nodded and understanding his plan, Zelda's protest was immediate. "No, it's too dangerous.""Do you really think Yunobo would use his Divine Beast to fight?" he argued, quieting the voice that reminded him how fervently Yunobo's predecessor, Daruk, had devoted himself to protect Hyrule.She mulled over the idea, but seemed unconvinced, staring into the half-full cup of juice. "There is still a risk," she said, and though Link could not help but agree, he could think of no better plan."Think about it, Zel," he urged. "We first encountered Cinna the very day we inducted Sidon. We do the same with Yunobo and Rudania, and maybe he'll just come to us!""With however many men he has, undoubtedly," Granté added. "Could be quite the fight."All eyes fell on Inglis; he answered the unspoken question, "Aurelia took his Yiga. Cinna only has his followers, what few are left."Link cracked a smile. "We have a chance then. We'll go to Eldin, wake up Rudania, and hope that Cinelgen shows himself." He looked to Zelda for her approval, and while the concern was held on her face, she nodded."Searching isn't enough anymore, we have to lay a trap," and at her word, the decision was made.The Goron brawler threw his huge arms wide and gathered all three Hylians into a hug when he saw them, saying, "You guys! You're actually here!"The vibrancy that radiated from Yunobo was alone enough to quell any last minute concerns Zelda might have had about this mission. She had dreamt all night of how their plan might go wrong; of how the peaceful beast might suddenly rage, spitting fire like a dragon of the mountain, or how it might suddenly betray them, turning to leap back into the lava.Link managed to push Yunobo off them, and Inglis who had been in the middle – and thus was subject to most of the force of the crushing embrace – needed a moment to sit down and catch his breath."You know, I wasn't sure when you summoned me," Yunobo said. "But seeing the old Beast again just makes me so excited!"The wait for their Goron Champion had not been long; by Yunobo's own account he had left for Eldin the minute the Rito courier had arrived with the letter of summoning. And their journey had not been direct. Despite his Guardian's low maintenance and hardy constitution, Link drew the line at taking Rhoamet up Death Mountain. Not only would their hike along the rocky mountain paths be precarious enough without a giant automaton to look after, the road would take them through the Maw - where there would be more people, and pertinently, more dead Guardians.They had decided instead to leave Rhoamet with the Sheikah, with Granté and Nell remaining to watch over him. He just wants to talk to that Pawpaw girl, Nell had snided.Paya had met them at the base of the stairs into her grandmother's house, shaking from what could have just as easily been joy as it was fear. Zelda had expected her, like the others, to cower at the sight of the Guardian. But when she smiled - and said, overjoyed, "Is that a Guardian!?" - she realised the reason none in Kakariko would fear Rhoamet. He is a Sheikah too. They are kin.And so it was easy enough to convince Impa to let them leave Rhoamet in Kakariko while they travelled north to Eldin. Time was sadly so short; as much as Zelda wanted to stay, and find one more day's respite in the hidden village, they were all acutely aware that Cinelgen could be anywhere, and could appear at any moment.Divine Beast Vah Rudania remained asleep and perched over the lip of Death Mountain when they approached. A remote diagnostic told her that he had entered a low-power state."How long has Rudania been asleep?" she asked Yunobo as they made the final hike to the Beast."A month or so?" he answered. "I'm not so great with time.""Is something wrong with him?" Inglis asked tersely. Zelda pointed to the long seeps of Malice emerging out from between the crevices of Rudania's segmented face."He does not sleep voluntarily. That Malice has made it to his inner workings. I saw something similar with Vah Medoh."The induction process would come first. Zelda was uncertain about performing the Cleansing Ritual on Rudania while he still sat perched on the lip of Death Mountain - afraid somewhat that they might unwittingly send him back into the volcano."It's been a little while since I studied elixirs," she added. "But I'm fairly sure fireproof elixirs will not also make us lava proof."But they could not induct a pilot to an unconscious Beast. So they drank another round of fireproof elixir and made the precarious climb into Vah Rudania – Link leading the way, with Zelda close behind, then Inglis, and finally Yunobo at the back to catch them if any one of them slipped.Once they had made it inside, Zelda held a naked palm to Vah Rudania's main control unit, letting her power flow into the nexus."Wake up," she whispered.Like Medoh before him, controlled even if momentarily by the power of the Three on Zelda's right hand, Rudania awakened, the inner chamber filling with light and the joints of his vast body creaking from disuse.
Keeper. I awaken to follow your command.
"If you follow my command, then you will follow the command of my ally, Yunobo," Zelda addressed the Beast. Inglis and Yunobo were watching with muted amazement, while Link instead continued scanning the Beast with the Sheikah Slate - he had seen such an exchange before.
I am ready. Unveil your Champion.
Before they began the induction process, Inglis asked, "Would I be able to? It's just so fascinating…""More than welcome to!" Zelda smiled, happy to have a student. She stepped him through the process; where Yunobo should stand, the right setting on the Slate, the induction process itself, and Inglis was a fast learner."Ready when you are, big guy," he said.Yunobo gave a quick salute. "Ready!"It was over in a second, without so much as a sound, and soon Yunobo was giddily leading his Divine Beast down the side of Goron mountain, his Hylian companions struggling to maintain their balance on the steep incline. They settled on a line of cliffs that overlooked Hyrule Field, facing westwards, with Zelda happily calling the induction a success."Yunobo of Goron City, I officially induct you into the role of pilot of Divine Beast Vah Rudania. Now, if you will allow us…" Zelda extended an arm to Link, who was already unsheathing his sword. "We have one more ritual to perform."The change felt almost natural now; she was back, in the elsewhere. Zelda had preemptively removed her glove before beginning the Cleansing Ritual, and so now the Other Place shone as soon as she entered. The skies were an orange-gold, just as the last time she had seen them."Are you now ready to see what I promised to show you?" said the hooded woman. She stood before the pedestal again, and this time Zelda saw that it was made of glass."I don't know," Zelda admitted. "How could I know?""We never do," the hooded woman sighed. She placed her hand on the pedestal.Suddenly, Zelda's vision was filled with light; hundreds, if not thousands of echoes of past lives and other times filling passing before, swarming her. Zelda closed her eyes, distraught by what she saw."You must look!" the woman bellowed. "You must understand!"And so, hesitant, but unafraid, Zelda looked.It was a symphony. A thousand faces, a thousand lives. A boy, and a girl, and a kingdom. Sometimes held skyward, sometimes separated by time, sometimes adrift at sea, shrouded in twilight and darkness, or shielded by light and prosperity; through chaos, and peace, and war."W-what is this!?" Zelda cried.The woman was gone. Only her voice remained. "This is Hyrule. This is you. Your history and your legend."The visions were nearly impossible to parse, but in almost every image, almost every life - the Sword. The same sword that Zelda now held. Wielded by a warrior with an unbreakable spirit. Zelda gazed up at the faces and focused on the boy. Time had changed him from one life to the next; sometimes young or sometimes old, sometimes stoic, or cheeky, or lazy. But it was him."Link!" she breathed."Look beyond!" ordered the woman. "Who else do you see?"Zelda tore her eyes away to study the wisps of history before her. In every life, she saw, almost always at the boy's side in one way or another, was a girl. A Princess, with destiny stamped onto her right hand. These are my sisters, she thought as she looked at the myriad of women before her. My kin."How is this even possible?" Zelda asked, harrowed by what she had seen. "How many lives have we lived?"The woman reappeared before her, face downcast with what almost seemed like shame. "I don’t know," she said. “Too many to count.”"So...so we will never stop fighting, then?! Even if we triumph now, Hyrule is doomed to fall once more, each and every time?"The woman did not hesitate. "Yes," she said, as though the word was law."Then...then why bother!?" Zelda searched the visions for an end, a finale, but found none. "Why fight when we know we will eventually lose!?"The visions converged into a single moment; the swing of a sword, cutting down a centre of darkness, and a sphere a light to swallow it whole. "Each victory may be followed by loss," the hooded woman said. "But each loss is followed by victory. All that matters is the peace in between."Zelda could feel her hand burning where the golden crest was marked. She wanted to shield her eyes again, but could not look away. "You think I can bring them peace? For how long?""A single year of peace can be worth a hundred at war," the woman appeared before the pedestal again, and with another touch to the iridescent glass, the visions dissipated."You cannot prevent Ganon's return," her voice was crisp against the sudden silence. "But you can prepare for it. The Sheikah succeeded, ten thousand years ago. They used their vast wisdom to walk a new path to victory. Hyrule needs these paths, or history to learn from will become legend to be revered, and then myth to be lost, as it has since the dawn of time. And nothing will be gained."Zelda could still see flashes of what she had been shown; the wheel on which time seemed to flow, the torrent that seemed to carry her people through its motions. If there is a way to make an end…"Tell me what I must do," she said.The hooded woman urged Zelda over to the glass pedestal, and with each step that she took, Zelda saw the light dance within the glass like ripples on a lake."The Champion - he is still struggling with himself," the woman explained. "There is a memory he must see, but not his own. Without it, he cannot make the decision that will lead him to the new life that he desires."Looking down into the glass, Zelda saw the shade of her reflection gazing back, "I can see...the past? All of it?" she asked, holding her hand above the pedestal."Just as I have shown you. We are not restricted here, by place, or time. We are unbidden."All of history at her palm. So much she wanted to see. Her Father, her mother, her home...but at last she remembered. She had no home if she did not complete this mission. "Help me find Cinelgen," she commanded.The woman stammered. "That isn’t what I meant–""If I don’t find him, there will be no new life, for anyone.""...lower your hand," the woman relented. "Focus. Think on his face. That's how you will find him."Zelda lowered her hand and closed her eyes, remembering. She had only met Cinelgen twice, but his was not a face to forget. When she opened them, she was...back in Necluda. Somewhere amongst the mountains. Only she smelt smoke. She heard screams. She turned, and then she saw - Cinelgen on his horse, leading a charge into the village, his men at his back and a dozen Yiga in pursuit. She saw a golden haired woman with one eye stand to face him. Then she noticed the houses around her, all clustered together, built on raised foundations, with arched roofs, bamboo and cherry trees planted between them. It was the past, but only a step backwards, rather than the bounds that the hooded woman had taken her. Perhaps only a few minutes, or seconds even.No matter the exactness of it, Zelda knew what she saw was true. And she knew, with horror, what it meant.They had gone the wrong way.The ritual ended with a burst of light, but no sooner than it was done did Zelda turn to flee Vah Rudania. Link called out after her, but she did not stop, bolting out of the Beast and across the rocky cliffs. There was barely time to sheathe his sword; Link ran after her, hearing the crunch of rocks behind him as Yunobo and Inglis followed."We need to go, Link," she said frantically, scanning the horizon."What did you see?" Link pressed. Zelda had told him of the visions she had seen in this ‘Other Place’ as she called it, and how she only seemed to reach it when she held the Sword. She had sung during this ritual too - apparently another part of the puzzle."He's nearby! Necluda!" she stumbled, nearly falling, and Link managed to leap forward just in time to catch her. Only when they'd both been steadied did he realise what she had said."Necluda!?" he breathed. "But we were just-" he looked up towards the line of mountains in the distance. "Inglis, where would Cinna be-" Then he felt a shuffle at his belt, and he jumped to his feet, spinning around to see Inglis with the Sheikah Slate in hand."I'm sorry," he whispered. He stepped backwards to a nearby pool of lava, holding the Slate over the gurgling molten. He is cheeks were slick with wet tears.Link understood immediately, cursing himself for not thinking it sooner. He still belongs to Cinna."When Aury came to us, I nearly went with her. But I thought if I could catch Cinna, I could stop him from getting himself killed. And then he gave me an ultimatum. He said he'd kill her, Link,” he was sobbing, his whole arm shaking as he held the Sheikah Slate aloft. "He said he didn't need Mila anymore, now that he'd lost the Yiga. But he needed this," Inglis shook the Slate, and Link heard a strangled cry from Zelda.Yunobo shifted forwards, but Inglis lowered the Slate above the lava. "If anyone moves I'll drop it! I will! I'll tell him you did it, or I'll just kill him myself!" He hurriedly opened the map on the Slate, selecting a travel waypoint seemingly at random."Inglis…" Link said slowly. "Don't."The Akkalan shook his head, "I have to. I have no choice.""You knew where he was all along, didn't you?!" Zelda cried."Indeed I did. Pray you never need to lie to a friend, Princess," Inglis said, his eyes never leaving Link. "But there's still time. Cinna won't anticipate a Guardian."Kakariko. Link turned back towards Necluda and saw now what Zelda was looking for. Thick black smoke, rising high from the mountains of Lantern Lake. The realisation sent a lance of shock through him. Kakariko was burning; and Rhoamet, Paya and Impa were there among the smoke."You can still save them," Inglis said, a rueful smile on his lips, fattening his sunken cheekbones. Link winced; such rich pain to see that smile again. “You know what Link, I expect nothing less.”And with a swift tap on the Sheikah Slate, he disappeared.
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
Across bridges, between mountains, watching lazy palms overhead give way to newly flowering oaks and pines, heading south, then west, then north, with clouds or stars above, sand in her boots, muscles weak, heart pounding but never stopping; Aurelia gave chase like it was the only thing she knew. And now her horse had grown weak, its endurance run low.The chase had led them all through Faron, almost as far as Lurelin Village, and then west to the ruins of Old Lurelin. Aurelia had heard the tale - the storm that had destroyed an entire fishing village and forced its people to meander until they found a new home in what was known today simply as Lurelin. Cinelgen is my storm, she had told herself. I will endure. My people will endure. There were times when Aurelia had wanted to give in and let Cinelgen go. But each time she had such a thought, she looked upon her younger sister Hana and remembered the sister she had lost. "For Cassiah," she had told Hana. "We will kill him for her if nothing else."Cinelgen had led the chase north, into the southern reaches of Central Hyrule, and at one point even into the ruins of the old Colosseum. They had almost caught him then when the entire group had encountered a silver Lynel. She had lost one of her number to the beast; horrifyingly, it had spit fire. Aurelia could still hear the screams. In the chaos, Cinelgen and his stragglers had escaped.But suddenly, unexpectedly, they had reappeared in Hyrule Field. One of her scouts had spotted them walking in broad daylight, Cinelgen's hair like a beacon against the fields of renewed green. Her scouts had also reported seeing the lizard Beast walking down from Death Mountain, coming to rest on the cliffs and soon, being enveloped with light."We saw the same thing with the bird!" said Coya, one of the acolytes. "Some strange magic…"Link, Aurelia surmised. And perhaps, the Princess too.Aurelia thought that Cinelgen would seek to catch the Beast. She thought he would take them into Eldin, where she knew Link would be. But instead, Cinelgen kept on westwards, unhindered by the emptiness of the roads - a lingering effect of the conflict between the Zora and Gerudo - and pushed further towards Necluda, leading them up a grassy slope into the mountains. When his party spotted hers, the chase began anew.Hard and fast Cinelgen pressed his cohort - no more than half a dozen now - the grass and dirt kicked up by their horses' hooves. And harder Aurelia pushed hers, unafraid that her horse might fall. She had just over fifteen fighters in her number and could end this now if she wanted – the others were children, or workers who had never seen combat and she had told stay in Lurelin where it was safest.The mountains pressed in close, soon narrowing into a winding pass, the path adorned with strings of wooden charms painted brown and red, marking what seemed to be a hideout beyond. An old Yiga settlement? Where is he taking us?"We should slow!" Hana called from behind her. "It could be a trap!""No - we outnumber him more than two to one. We press on!" Aurelia called back.Without warning the pass widened into a village. It was older than any Aurelia had seen, with architecture that she did not recognise. What was this place? How had she never heard of it? Was it only known to those who were bladed?Undeterred, Aurelia led the charge into the village and was confronted with a vision of chaos. Several of the houses in the village were in flames, another one soon following as a duo of bomb arrows were fired towards it. Smoke filled the air, as did the stench of mud and the sounds of shrieks. Aurelia's horse reared at the sudden onslaught, and an arrow that sliced through its neck caused it to topple. She landed hard, pain lancing along her body, feeling her eyes rattle in her skull like marbles. She clawed at the grass and mud under her palms, crawling away from her still squirming horse."Find him!" she cried over her shoulder as her Yiga scattered. "We're being attacked!"If she was heard, she could not know. The black smoke was pervasive, and the village all but disappeared. Eyes stinging and mouth tasting of ash, Aurelia staggered to her feet. A man with hair and garb both of white sprung forth through the smoke, a thin sword raised towards her. Aurelia dodged, spinning on her heel to elbow the man in the back. He crashed to the ground, and Aurelia fled forwards, intent on finding Cinelgen.Who was he? Aurelia had not recognised him; she had never seen him among Cinelgen's followers, and she had thought the village abandoned. There was no time to think. She reached a deep pool with a Goddess statue at its centre, where she found Coya facing off with another dressed in white garb. Another stranger. Who are these people? Reaching for her sickle, Aurelia rushed towards Coya, but the acolyte pushed his attacker into the pool before she could reach them."Find the others! Find my sister!" she ordered. "Something… isn't right!""By your word, Chief," Coya said, disappearing into the smoke, the title startling her. I'm not your Chief, she thought as she pressed on through the village. Out from the haze emerged an enormous raised house, with steep stairs leading up to a wooden dais. It was there that she spotted Cinelgen, avoiding the chaos, his Duplex bow in hand, two fizzling bomb arrows held between his fingers. It was him, she realised, he set these fires. Why?It did not matter; the time had come. Aurelia raced up the stairs, her sickle in hand. Cinelgen caught sight of her immediately, raising his bow and nocking an arrow in her direction. At that moment, the doors of the house burst open, and a tall Hylian girl - again with the white hair - leapt forward to tackle the Gerudo. Cinelgen loosed his arrow, but it missed, the debris exploding behind Aurelia. Flailing, Cinelgen managed to throw the girl off of his back, but the tussle had given Aurelia enough time to reach the top of the stairs. Clumsy from the adrenaline and the leeching panic, she swiped towards Cinelgen's neck when she reached him, but he deflected her blade with the limb of his bow, rising to shove Aurelia backwards. She teetered on the edge of the stairs, and nearly fell, but regained her composure to close in on Cinelgen once more. His eyes were laughing, green and greedy for her; as though she were prey or a lover, it was hard to tell.In the distance, there was the call of a horn, and soon another round of screams. The Guardian, someone shouted, and just for a moment, Aurelia turned.She saw blue, and then her vision went white, hard knuckles sending splitting pain like lightning across her temple. She crashed against the wood railing of the dais, dazed and incoherent. Above, the hazy vision of a Gerudo in red and purple retreated, and was replaced by the Hylian girl."Are you hurt?!" the girl said, pulling Aurelia up. When their eyes met, and Aurelia's hood fell away, her face froze. "Wait… you're not Sheikah..." she stammered, and Aurelia saw on the girl's face - the tattoo of the eye of the Sheikah. An inverted Yiga eye."But you are," Aurelia said. She looked back down the stairs towards the village, spotting a line of frog statues painted with the Sheikah eye, and then the eye on doors, banners, chimes. This wasn't a Yiga hideout at all. This was Kakariko.Cinelgen had indeed led them into a trap. Aurelia scrambled to her feet. He planned this.In the distance, Cinelgen was riding from town, the remainder of his followers in tow. Around her, the village burned, while below the Sheikah fought her Yiga; as they had for thousands of years. And in the midst, unmistakable — the five-legged Guardian who had taken her eye, panicking and rampaging, swatting savagely at any who crossed his path.Aurelia seized the Sheikah girl by the shoulders. "Link!?""Not here. Eldin!" the girl replied, face wrought with fear.Aurelia pointed to Rhoamet. "Then why leave him-?""To keep him safe!"A beam of searing energy arced across the courtyard below, exploding against a cliff's edge that bordered the town. There was another shriek, this time one she recognised, and Aurelia could do nothing but watch helplessly as one of the Sheikah warriors buried his blade into Coya's chest.Sheikah and Yiga were going to destroy each other once and for all if this was not stopped.But... Cinelgen was escaping, riding out through southern pass. From below, Aurelia heard the shouts. The familiar words; Kill it! Shut it down!"Stop!" she cried, unable to deliberate any longer. She poured down the stairs to the courtyard. "Stop, everyone!"Her Yiga had been pushed into the centre of the village, surrounded by the Sheikah. Hana saw Coya's body, and wailed at the sight, while the rest of the Yiga kept their sickles raised, ready to meet any further attacks. Aurelia burst through the crowd to reach her people, heading straight for her sister Hana, who was crouching over Coya's body. "These aren't Cinelgen's people!" Aurelia told them. "They are Sheikah! We cannot fight them!""Sheikah you say. We’d gladly fight them!" one of the Yiga spat – a tall acolyte named Theo.“Stand down! That is an order!” Aurelia said. She clenched her fists. Curse Cinelgen for making her do this – making her become this. “As… as your Master, I command it!”Theo looked at her incredulously. “You?” he hissed.“Yes. Strike me down if you want that job for yourself!” Aurelia said defiantly. “Otherwise do as I have said.”For a horrible moment, Aurelia imagined the acolyte raising his sickle, but instead Theo bowed his head and turned back towards the Sheikah that surrounded them.Before the tension could break, another beam of energy rocketed above their heads. A trio of Sheikah was trying to subdue Rhoamet, but one made the mistake of attacking, and the Guardian began to panic once more.Without thinking, as if drawn to the creature, Aurelia ran towards the Guardian, ducking and weaving past the Sheikah that had surrounded her. Rhoamet’s beady eye flashed, and his remaining metal legs thrashed, but fearless she dodged between them and leapt onto Rhoamet's shell. He wheeled away from her, broad head and body spinning, but Aurelia held firm, gripping one his handles and pulling herself up onto his domed head."Rhoamet! Rhoamet!" Aurelia cried, struggling to keep her hold on him. "Don't you remember me?"Backwards still Rhoamet stumbled, and around him, Aurelia caught sight of the Sheikah scrambling to evade his path."Link! I knew Link!" she said, directing the words to Rhoamet's shining eye. "I need you to calm down, if not for me then for Link!"At last, Rhoamet began to slow, and then, he started to blink. Aurelia had not learned much of Link's code, but she remembered a few things. Most of all, she remembered the phrase Rhoamet used the most.
Link
"Yes!" Aurelia beamed, patting Rhoamet's ceramic head. "Link! I knew him. He's coming back for you, I know he is."And at that, Rhoamet sat, plonking down against the grass. Above, the sky had opened, and a torrential rain put an end to the fires that Cinelgen had started. Aurelia climbed down from the Guardian's body and turned to see the Sheikah of the village staring at her in shock. Her Yiga were unharmed, still crowded around Coya's body.Aurelia looked up at the dais. "We are not your enemy!" she told the Sheikah girl still waiting there. An elderly woman had appeared by her side, wearing a full hat adorned with heavy, dangling chains."Then who are you?" the elderly woman asked.There was no point hiding it, even if it meant more danger. Aurelia had no qualms with the Sheikah, despite her own birth; in fact, these were the first she had ever met. And her people were injured, in need of respite, lest they die before ever reaching Cinelgen.Raising her right arm, Aurelia peeled back her sleeve, revealing the tattoo of the Yiga eye. Before she could speak, the Sheikah bristled, but she ignored them."I am a Yiga. But I have no fight with your people," she addressed the elderly woman. "I am a friend of Link's, and I am known to this Guardian. My people were tricked into coming here!""Yiga!" someone cried. "We should kill them all!""Traitors!" cried another, moving forward with his eight-fold blade pointed towards Aurelia."No!" came the voice of Sheikah girl from the dais. She ran down the stairs, positioning herself by Aurelia's side. "This Yiga saved my life. It was the Gerudo who attacked our homes, the one called Cinelgen! She tried to stop him!"The elderly women held a hand to her chin. "Is this so, Paya?" she asked ponderously, walking one step at a time to the base of the stairs. When she approached, the crowd parted."It is, grandmother," the Sheikah girl answered.The Shiekah elder stood before Aurelia, looking at her with laboured, knowing eyes. No truth would escape this woman, Aurelia saw.“You did not answer my question, girl,” the old woman said.Aurelia held her right arm up again to display her tattoo and sighed. “My name is Aurelia of Karusa Valley. Master of the Yiga.”The old woman carefully placed her hand on Aurelia’s arm, and pushed it down so that Aurelia held her palm out towards her. “Funny, from this perspective, that tattoo looks like a Sheikah eye.”“Our people were once one. We share a lot.”The old woman hummed in agreement. "Even then, I am afraid I cannot allow you to stay. My people would not abide it," the elderly woman began. "But I can allow you to go. Travel north, and find a fairy fountain. There you can rest, and heal your wounded.""Thank you, sincerely. We will do as you say," Aurelia nodded, and then she looked to Rhoamet. "Will he be safe with you?""We cannot keep him here!" protested one of the Sheikah. "He almost destroyed the town!" The Shiekah muttered in agreement, many casting concerned glances towards the automaton."We promised Link that we would watch over him," the elderly woman scolded. She moved through the crowd towards the Guardian, and when she reached Rhoamet, she placed a frail hand on one of his legs. "My apologies, Rhoamet. We failed to keep you safe, but at least you had a friend here."Rhoamet looked down at the tiny woman, and then to Aurelia, and back again.Yes, the Guardian said. Aurelia.Acting on the advice of the Sheikah elder, Aurelia took her Yiga north into the woods, and they made camp by the luminescent Fairy Fountain that was hidden there. Once or twice, she had been curious to attempt to summon the being that dwelled in the pool - perhaps to seek aid in healing her wounded, or even just for curiosity's sake. But the day had been extraordinary enough, what with a semi-truce between the Sheikah and the Yiga, and her own success in calming Rhoamet. Aurelia did not want to push her luck.The plan was to move on at dawn, and continue the search for Cinelgen. The loss of Coya was a tragedy, yes, but thankfully the rest of her kin were mostly unharmed. A few cuts and bruises, one or two slashes, a broken arm. They were safe, and relatively able, for now.Rhoamet had been led to the fountain as well and Aurelia had told him to sleep, and wake for nothing but Link's voice, promising that the Champion would surely return from Eldin soon. And soon it was - sooner than Aurelia expected - that she heard Link's voice for herself."Aurelia! Rhoamet!" came the call, and when she turned, she saw two riders bounding into the woods. Link, outfitted in blue and white, and a golden haired girl that could only be the Princess. She was a regal little thing, but a touch less proper than Aurelia had been expecting. Her hair was short, barely past her chin, braided away from her face but otherwise unadorned. Her clothes were practical and weathered, and beneath the girl's dark woollen coat Aurelia spotted a leather chest guard. Link still wore his Sheikah goggles around his neck, Aurelia saw. He raced straight past her, making a beeline for his Guardian. When the automaton woke to his voice, Link cried out with joy, leaping onto Rhoamet's shell to wrap his arms around his domed head."You okay, buddy?" he asked, and Rhoamet replied with a simple, Yes. Satisfied, Link returned to where Aurelia stood, helping Zelda dismount from her horse."Where did Cinna go?" he demanded.Aurelia smirked, leaning back and tucking her thumbs into her belt loops. "Pleasure to see you too, Champion." She nodded to the golden-haired girl and bowed. "You must be the Princess. Honoured."Zelda bowed in return. "I've heard much about you, Aurelia." The Princess smiled warmly, in a way that caught Aurelia off guard with its sincerety. "Was Cinelgen truly here?""Sure was, he tricked us into fighting," Aurelia explained with a sigh. "I had to let him go to stop it. I wish there had been another way, I really do."The Princess face betrayed no anger or disappointment. She merely nodded in understanding, and said, "At least your people are safe.""What about Inglis?" Link interrupted. "He has the Slate, you know.""Inglis?" Aurelia raised an eyebrow. "I haven't seen him in weeks. He was with Cinelgen in Faron and then he just… disappeared. I assumed he escaped."Link's brows furrowed. "Well he didn't," he said bitterly. "He is still loyal to Cinna."Aurelia clicked her teeth, shaking her head and muttering, "Stupid boy. Stupid, stupid boy," The revelation bothered her more than she expected. "That Milagre, he's still enraptured by her despite everything.""But I thought she, you know… ended things," Link said, and Aurelia could not help but laugh."When it suited her, sure, so that Cinna knew she was loyal," Aurelia kicked the dirt with her boot, low frustration bubbling within her. "But I know Mila. She doesn't look it, but she's a hoarder. Books, trinkets, memories, love. The boy will die before he's free of her."The golden Princess listened quietly, face a little clouded with confusion, and Aurelia wondered how much Link had told her. "If I may, Aurelia," she asked. "Why are you here and not in the village?""I have allowed them to coalesce here, to avoid further conflict." They turned to see the elderly Sheikah standing behind them - the woman who Aurelia now knew as Impa - accompanied by her granddaughter, Paya."But she stopped the attack," Zelda said. "This woman saved your village."Impa spoke plainly, her words almost law. "She is Yiga. For time immemorial we have been enemies--""She is Link's friend, and the only person in all of Hyrule to find Cinelgen," Zelda protested. "Put aside your enmities, Impa, no matter how immemorial. I will not see her people mistreated for their birth.""Well now," Aurelia smiled. "I can see what he liked about you."The quip went ignored by all except Link, who cast her a sideways glance and a knowing, upwards nod."As you say, Princess," Impa said somberly, her head bowed low. "Do as you please, Aurelia of Karusa. Come into the village, or rest here. I will ensure that you are free to do either."The elder turned to walk back into the village, but her granddaughter begged her to wait one moment. "I just want to thank you," Paya said, her hands at her chest. "And apologise. You saved my life, all of our lives, even knowing who we were.""It's what anyone would have done," Aurelia shrugged."Perhaps," Paya said shyly, and she escorted her grandmother back down the path to the village.With Link's help, the rest of the Yiga were healed with the power that he had once used to repair what was left of Aurelia's eye. Once they were done, Aurelia looked towards the direction Cinelgen had fled. "How are your horses?" she asked. "We have another chase yet.""Where would he have gone?" Zelda wondered.Aurelia looked around at her recovering group of Yiga, and down towards the still smoking village. The answer was not difficult to find; "He will go where he can cause chaos," she said.Down through the mountains of Necluda they raced, across Blatchery Plain and once more through Fort Hateno, to the place where Zelda quietly hoped she would not find Cinelgen. The Hylians have suffered enough, she thought in silent prayer. Preserve them this day.But the prayer was not answered. Link and Zelda rode breathlessly ahead of Aurelia's Yiga – the half dozen who had volunteered to come along – and found Hateno already under attack. Cinelgen's motley of followers were tearing through the town with torches in hand, setting fire again to the homes and cutting down any who got in their way. They burned high and hot, even though the rain overhead was relentless as it had been since their arrival to Kakariko the night prior. She was thankful then that Link had decided to leave Rhoamet in the village once more; she had heard about his outburst. And the scene before her was much worse than Kakariko had been.The inhabitants of the town were in a fray, fleeing from the burning buildings and stumbling across the muddy ground. Reede was among them, hauling buckets of water and shouting orders – a leader born. Zelda broke away from Link and the Yiga, hurrying to where the mayor stood."Get your people to the Tech Lab!" she said. "The building with the blue flame! They’ll be safest there!"Reede gave an affirmative nod. "Yes, Princess," he said, and began rounding his people up to push north through the town.Through the chaos, Link, Zelda and Aurelia tried to weed out the attackers but found only four. They met outside of the inn; Aurelia cutting one down with her sickle, Link finishing off two with his Master Sword, and Zelda piercing the last through the chest with an arrow.The rains did not cease, and soon the fires were out, but Cinelgen was nowhere to be found. Reede returned down the hill to the inn, his leathery face red from exhaustion, but he reported that all who he had evacuated were safe, taking refuge with the researcher that lived there, and his daughter."I have not seen your Gerudo," Reede frowned. "No one has.""But he must be here!" Zelda insisted, turning to scan the town for any sign of Cinelgen."So where did he go?" Aurelia added. They all looked then, but it was Link who found him.He pointed towards a waft of smoke coming from the southwest, long and thin. With a hint of resignation, he said, "Home."The fire was still lit, crackling softly in the hearth. The curtains were drawn, and the windows shuttered, and so, no light breached the house, the only illumination the fire, casting drawn and looming shadows.Cinelgen did not turn when Link and Zelda entered the house alone. He stood before the fire, his long velvet cloak wet and hanging on the mantle to dry, his hair soaked against his scalp, his hand held out to the flames. Zelda spotted his Duplex bow still slung over his back, the accompanying quiver half-full of bomb arrows."This place really is lovely," the Gerudo said. "So simple. Unassuming. It makes sense really. What else would be left, after what Ganon did to the world?"Link spoke before Zelda could even think of a reply. "Not much,” he said. “I know it can be lonely, for people like us."Cinelgen laughed bitterly. "Us? There was never an us, you said so yourself. We were never on the same side.""But we could have been," Zelda said. "We never needed to be enemies. You said my people were leaves to the wind, but you fed the flames that scattered them.""I've never had a 'people,'" Cinelgen scoffed."What about the Gerudo?"He gave a desultory wave of his hand. "I never knew them. I've never been within a mile of Gerudo City. My mother raised me in isolation. She told me how I would be treated.""But you had Gerudo in your followers," Link challenged him. "Devotees."At last Cinelgen turned. "Outcasts. Interlopers. Bandits. Those were my followers." He paced through the room, running a long-fingered hand over the furniture, his emerald eyes never meeting theirs. "People that didn't like the narrow paths they were given. My mother told me that mine was a life of isolation, that my aunts and cousins would hate me just for who I was."He raised his eyes, reaching slowly for his bow. Zelda readied herself, a hand shifting towards her own weapon. Cinelgen went on, unaffected by the rising tension."My mother was murdered, in Gerudo Valley, by a bladed Yiga who found our little hut. I wanted to kill that masked bastard more than I ever wanted anything, but I let him take me to Karusa. You know why?"Zelda held her breath. Cinelgen's voice was thick as caramel, rich with a heavy burden, a lifelong weight finally given up. His eyes became glassy with tears as he spoke. "I learnt that the only change is the change we make. I knew then that this whole world - this monster infested, empty, isolated world - needed to change, and the Yiga taught me how.""Empty?" Link said. "You filled a castle with people that followed you. Inglis and Milagre worshipped you. Wasn't that enough?""It was, for a time," Cinelgen's head bobbed gently in agreement. Was it grief on his face? Zelda looked upon the looming, fierce-faced Gerudo before her and for the first time saw him for the broken man he was. Her hate dissolved into pity."None of this needed to happen," she said, trying to understand. "Change is inevitable, but it need not be destructive."The Gerudo shook his head. His voice fell to a low whisper. "Maybe. Maybe I would have been content with my little band of misfits, living out our days on the road," He drew a long, heavy breath. "But then we found something. In the very place no one would look because it was infested with the beast that you killed. It changed everything, the entire history of this place, everything I thought I was, and I knew then I had no choice but to rule.”“You…you went down there!?” Zelda said with horror. “It was forbidden. Even I have never, even my own family never–!”Cinelgen began to laugh, a long reedy laugh that soon became cackles. “Just wait until you find it! I’m sure you will.” He swallowed, a last strained chuckle leaving him. His face went cold. "I almost gave up. Your attack took nearly everything I had. And then that golden-haired woman showed up and took my Yiga too.""They weren’t yours. You forced them to follow," Link frowned. He had raised a hand to the hilt of his Sword. They were all ready, waiting for whatever ripple would break the tension on the surface."Worse. I destroyed them, I know," Cinelgen conceded. "Little Aury reminded me that destruction is all I am. She said I would destroy towns, well, she got what she wanted. You’ve heard of the King of Theives haven’t you?”“The Gerudo King,” Zelda answered. “You aren’t him.”“No! But my whole life his name is all I heard. I wanted to be more. I wanted to shape chaos into being," A weak smile broadened on his weathered face, revealing yellowed teeth. "Like a God!"Cinelgen drew two arrows from his quiver, preparing to nock them into his bow. He moved slowly, as if drunk, or in a dream. Zelda cast a quick glance towards Link; he had tightened his grip on the hilt. Any second now and the room would implode."Were you going to die alone, Cinna?" Link warned. "After all you've done?""I will not," Cinelgen shook his head, nocking the arrows. "Tell me; Inglis, did he succeed?"Link's eyes darkened, a hard scowl forming on his face. "Where did you send him?"Cinelgen shrugged. "Even if you find him, he will always belong to me. He saw what I saw. He knows what's down there, if he will ever tell you. And so my regime ends with him.""Where did you send him?" Link demanded.The Gerudo said nothing. His only answer was a whistle, his greedy smile turning expectant, but nothing happened. Instead, the door opened, and Aurelia stepped into the house, twirling a bloodied sickle in one hand, and holding a half-eaten banana in the other. "Evening's welcome, Chief," she sneered. "Where are my men!?" Cinelgen barked.Aurelia took another bite of the banana and tossed the peel aside. "Oh, your ambushers?" she said, chewing casually. "They got excited and stormed the inn, and now they’re gone," She swallowed. "Your regime is over."With a growl, Cinelgen loosed the two arrows towards them, but Zelda blocked in time with a barrier, and lighting fast Link surged forward to seize Cinelgen's bow and snap it in two. It fell broken to the floor, splintered and useless, while Aurelia's Yiga flooded into the house to drag Cinelgen outside. As they hauled him into the centre of the town, he barely fought, though the dead weight of him was enough that Aurelia and three of her men needed to carry him. The rains were falling harder now, the rolling clouds above a sullen and oppressive grey. With fearful eyes, the villagers that remained in the town watched from the safety of their homes or crouched behind walls and around corners. Zelda spotted Reede among them, keen interest on the man's face.The Yiga shoved Cinelgen to his knees, binding his arms tightly behind his back. And though he did not struggle, one of Aurelia's footsoldiers socked him across the face as a warning. Cinelgen was subdued, blood running down his chin from where his lip had been split. Aurelia reached for her sickle, but Zelda stopped her."We promised him to Chief Riju.""And Riju will have him," Aurelia answered, holding her sickle raised. "Once he is dead. I must do this for my people."Zelda stood firm, squaring up to the taller woman. She willed herself not to be intimidated. "I have obligations to our allies. They still consider the Yiga our enemies…""Then I will pledge my support to you, and forever put down my blade against any and all citizens of Hyrule. As will my people, if you allow me to kill this traitor."The Yiga woman's gaze was as sharp as her blade, but there was honesty in her severity. Zelda looked to Link, and without hesitation, he nodded."Why do this?" she asked. "You do not know me."Aurelia pointed her blade towards Link. "I know he trusts you, and I know I trust him. You want to rebuild Hyrule. I want to give my people a new home. Our ambitions align."Cinelgen had been watching with an amused smirk, his lips bright red from the blood. "The Princess and her Knight," he taunted, writhing against his binds and gnashing his teeth. "Made murderers by none other than myself. Maybe I am the King of Thieves reborn.""Don't flatter yourself," Aurelia snapped.The eyes of Hateno were watching; as were the Yiga, and Link and Aurelia. The time to make the decision was short. Feeling her Father standing at her back, Zelda stood before Cinelgen, and raised her hand towards him, speaking as loudly and clearly as she could."Cinelgen of Gerudo. You are accused of numerous crimes. Murder. Treason. Conspiracy. Usurping the crown, and many more."Link approached the still squirming Gerudo and crouched before him. "I'm not just a Knight," he said quietly."For your crimes, I, Zelda of Hyrule-""Then what are you?" Cinelgen spat."I don't yet know. But I will always be more than you. Words hurt, but words disappear. And you were never anything but words.""-sentence you to death."Zelda lowered her hand and nodded to Aurelia.Aurelia's sickle glistened, now washed clean by the rains, and it caught the light when she held it against Cinelgen's neck. He stiffened, understanding crossing his features, and raised his head. "Think of me then, when you face what comes next."Aurelia was swift, unfeeling; an executioner born.Cinelgen made no sound, and struggled no more, the smile on his face outmatched only by the bright red smile that split his neck. He slumped forward, falling face down onto the mud and grass, his crimson hair turned black by the rain.Minutes passed before any in the crowd moved. Even Aurelia watched with a solemn stillness, muttering at last, "Ganon take you." It was Link who checked that the Gerudo was indeed dead, finding, or perhaps not finding a pulse, and giving the signal of what had come to pass.The villagers had not departed, eager, if a little greedy, to witness the aftermath. Zelda surveyed the crowd and saw only strangers. And yet they are my people. Do they understand what has happened here?Raising her voice against the incessant rain, she said, "My name is Zelda Bosphoramus Hyrule, but who I am does not matter now. Your town has suffered, but we will help you rebuild and I promise you, I will work for the rest of my life to ensure this never happens again."In the crowd, she spotted Reede once more and saw the mayor smile. The villagers began to dissipate then, the melodrama ended, until Link, Zelda and Aurelia and her Yiga were alone in the main thoroughfare of Hateno. Cinelgen lay between them, somehow smaller now than he had ever been.And just when silence had fallen, through the sound of the rain and the roar of thunder overhead, Zelda heard the sound that had been their first call to action; the first hint of the chaos she had just quelled, of the regime she had just ended.It echoed between the mountains, so loud and so deep that it shook the ground; the trumpeting roar of an elephant.All turned towards the cliffs in the north, to where Divine Beast Vah Ruta sat perched atop her plateau. And all watched as, impossibly, the Beast fired a tremendous blast of energy towards Hyrule Castle, the great beam soaring through the sky and narrowly missing the mountains to the west."Goddess preserve us," Aurelia gasped.They were powerless against the retaliation that followed. In the far away Hebra mountains, Vah Medoh angled towards Lanayru. On the cliffs of Eldin, and the mesas of Gerudo, Vah Rudania and Vah Naboris followed, orienting themselves towards Vah Ruta.Link's gaze was set steadfast to Lanayru. "It was Inglis," he said, almost mournful. "He has the Slate, he must be with Vah Ruta."There was no more convincing needed. Zelda was already making for her horse. "Someone needs to go to the Castle, to protect it-""-and someone to Ruta, to stop her," Link added.In unison, with terrible understanding, their eyes met. She felt that Link's thoughts were her own then. She could almost hear them. And as further proof, they turned at once towards Aurelia."The Yiga and I will take the body to Kakariko so that it is secure," she said, not needing any further prompt. For the first time since they had met, Zelda saw fear in the woman's eyes. She cast a nervous glance up towards the Divine Beast in Lanayru. "End this tragedy before it begins."They hurried to the edge of the town; Aurelia’s Yiga went east towards Kakariko, taking their dead Chief with them, the Yiga woman not stopping to say goodbye. Link and Zelda stood under the archway that led into Hateno, and Zelda looked out across the mountains and plains of Hyrule.The Castle to the west. The Beast to the north. This was where their paths split once more. Zelda intertwined her hand in Link's, unwilling to surrender him just yet."I lost you, for so long," she squeezed his hand so tight that her knuckles ached. "And then again and-" The words were on her tongue. If she said them, they would be little more than a whisper. "What little time we've had… Link, what if we never see each other again?"Link drew her in close, running a hand through her hair. "You know I-""No, don't. Say it when we return to each other."He laughed, his face so sweet and bright that it hurt her to look upon it. "Don't want to jinx it?" he teased, and Zelda could not help but smile."Even now, you make it all seem okay," she sighed, shaking her head. "How?"He was at ease as he always seemed to be. Shrugging and undemanding, Link made no show of the revelation; "I dunno,” he said. “Maybe because I love you."She slapped his arm. "You-!" But then she grabbed his collar and kissed him, deeply, desperately, feeling his arms around her. "You are not allowed to die," she whispered as they drew apart. "Not again. Not just because you've said it now, and not just because I love you too."For a moment, it seemed they might not be able to part as circumstance demanded. Link clutched her tight, beholding her with an expression that was nothing short of joy, and if there was anything around them but him, Zelda did not see it. But the rain had not stopped, and it was a sudden flash of lightning overhead that reminded her of the storm before them. "Let us go," she said. "Let us finish this."Releasing her, Link gave a short and formal bow. "As my Princess commands," he said, and they parted ways.The paraglider caught the gusts of air easily, sending Link soaring high above the cliffs. A gift from an old rival; a gale to carry him to the Beast beyond. There was a certain glee in it; the rush of the wind past his ears, and the rush of blood through his veins. She loves me, he repeated in his head. He was courage born then. Let the storm come.Vah Ruta remained perched towards Hyrule Castle, a faint but ominous red beam aimed towards the Castle centre. The hurried and desperate journey to reach her had not been easy; the rain was nothing short of unnatural.When he finally climbed over the perch of Ruta's Plateau, Link was nearly spent from relying so heavily on Revali's power to carry him up along the slick and unscalable cliffs. His fingers were red raw and aching from the climbing, as well as half frozen from gripping the icy cold rocks.On the plateau, he was met with a retinue of anxious Zora, waiting by the banks of the pool at the centre, with Ambassador Larella leading them. She looked a Princess crowned, adorned in weaving silver jewels, the necklace she wore bearing a brilliant sapphire; but the Prince was not with her."Link!" she cried, running towards the cliffs to meet him. "Praise the Goddess. Sidon has been taken!""What!? Where is he?" Link asked, and forebodingly, Larella turned to Vah Ruta. It was only then that Link realised the Beast had been completely sealed, the entrance closed and the pavilion archways at its stern blocked by panels of ancient ceramic. And worse still the Beast seemed to be sucking water in through its body and launching it into the air through her trunk, great waterfalls of water cascading down into the lake; it was the way she had been when he'd first encountered her."I was here with Sidon when we were attacked. I fled but he did not come with me, and when I returned he was gone into Vah Ruta!" Larella began to explain. "We tried to get in, but Ruta is sealed from the inside, and they have archers posted atop her…"Squinting, Link spied the trio of archers with lean longbows stationed on Vah Ruta. "How long ago?" he asked."Only an hour. We noticed the smoke in Necluda and we heard Vah Ruta cry and..." Larella wrapped her arms around herself, shaking, from the cold or from the shock. Link placed a steadying hand against her own, and she swallowed, regaining her composure. "I don't know if they have taken control or if he is being forced. But I know Sidon would never voluntarily fire Vah Ruta."Link turned back towards the Beast. Inglis is here, he thought to himself, and Mila too. He looked upon Vah Ruta's outer workings, and concentrated, thinking on a way he might force a way inside. Some way he might reset her. He focused on what he had been, what he had done; the repetitions, the recapitulations, each Beast he had met with its own story and personality.Link looked up Ploymus Mountain and understood what he must do. He turned to the Zora."Who among you is the strongest swimmer?"Down through the field and between the Duelling Peaks Zelda raced; a lone Princess on her horse, riding hard for home. Absurdly, she recalled a time when she had wanted nothing more than to be alone. To be an independent traveller, without the burden of duty or importance.But now, she could not imagine riding slower. She could not imagine tossing aside her duty. This home was hers; it had always been hers. She was born to protect it.She spied Vah Medoh tucked amongst the Hebra mountains, mounted on the spire of Lake Totori. Zelda tried to picture the white-feather Rito Warrior at its helm. What are you thinking? She wanted to ask him. What do you make of all this?Zelda was not sure what she would do once she reached the Castle. But she had to protect it. Not just because of the people who now lived there; Hyrule Castle was the only proof left that she and her family had ever lived at all. It was the only proof that her home had once been united. If it crumbled, if it fell, then there was no hope left.Cinelgen's last words swam in her mind -- Think of me when you face what comes next. She was afraid to know what he meant, afraid of the omen it spoke of. Perhaps there would never truly be peace, perhaps there would always be another war; another Princess, another Knight, another Kingdom. It didn’t matter. He loved her, and she loved him. They had everything they needed.Zelda emerged from between the peaks and turned her horse northwards.There had only been time to scavenge four shock arrows from Ploymus Mountain; the monstrous Lynel who lived there had found him not long after that. Link had narrowly escaped the beast by leaping from the cliff's edge and sailing with his paraglider back down to Vah Ruta.None other than Larella herself had volunteered to carry Link through the waters in his slapdash, haphazard attempt to unseal Vah Ruta. She would be quick and harder to hit, on account of being small in size. Just like Rhoamet, Link could not help but think, hoping his own beast was okay.Together they tore through the waters, arrows swishing into the waters from above. Larella approached the first waterfall, leaping up through the column of water and launching Link high above Vah Ruta. Once he began to fall, he felt his pulse slow, and his eyes dilate. Time flowed differently; and there it was, the song that Zelda so favoured. But he had heard it before. Or perhaps he had always heard it?The first shock arrow found the nexus, and Ruta shrieked. The second found one of the archers posted, before Link tumbled down into the waters. The next three in series followed; an arrow for Ruta and an arrow for the archers, until Ruta was appeased once more. She shuddered, jolting in the waters, and her sealed walls slid open."Launch me again! Before they reseal her!" Link shouted to Larella, and the Ambassador carried him to one of the waterfalls, scaling the water one last time to send Link skywards. Angling his paraglider towards the stern, Link sailed into Vah Ruta as Larella called from the waters,"Bring him back to me, Link!"He landed in the central chamber, its waters still flooded, and met with a familiar face; Sidon, bound hand and foot by thick ropes, and bloodied from whatever beating it took to bring him here. He was barely conscious and did not seem to notice Link hurriedly rush to his side and frantically pat his cheeks to try and stir him."Sidon!" Link whispered harshly. "Are they here? Inglis and Milagre?"The Prince's mouth fell slowly open, his enormous yellow eyes little more than slits, swollen and black from the beating. "Link?" he croaked, before smiling a crooked smile. "My friend, you're here!""Of course," Link assured him, working the ropes that bound him. "Friends keep each other safe."Though I failed you on that front, Link thought. But it was not too late. He could save Sidon, and then he would save Inglis - as the Akkalan boy had expected him to do. Summoning his strength, Link placed his hands on his chest and felt the power coalesce between them."They went to the trunk, the two Hylians," Sidon managed, grimacing at the pain of speaking. "... what are you doing?""I have a gift for you, Sidon, given to me by your sister," Link answered, steadying himself against the strange feeling of hollowness; of letting out a breath that never seemed to end. "She'd want you to have it.""Anything for her," Sidon grinned, revealing broken teeth and bloodied lips. Focusing, Link pressed the ball of power into Sidon's chest and watched it dissipate from between his fingers. In seconds, the Prince began to heal, and at that moment, Link felt Zora Princess’ presence between them. Thank you, Mipha, one last time, he thought, breathing through the familiar wave of regret he felt, before letting it go.Sidon gripped Link by the shoulders, his lucidity and strength returning. "Link, you must find them," he urged. “They took Ruta from me. They will use her again."“I will,” Link said, as he helped the Prince stand, refocusing on his task. “Go, Sidon. Larella is waiting.”The Prince nodded and thumped his chest with a balled fist – where his sister’s power now lived – and appraising Link with a determined look, he turned to hurry from his Divine Beast.Finding Milagre and Inglis didn’t take long. Their bickering could be heard from within Vah Ruta; they were stood atop the Divine Beast’s trunk, by one of the control terminals, arguing so fiercely that Link thought for a moment they might come to blows."Are you insane!?" Inglis shouted. "You have no idea what you are doing! You cannot fire again!""I am following orders," Milagre snapped. "As should you!"When Link glided in and landed on the trunk platform, Milagre for once could not hide her shock."You?!" she hissed, immediately stowing the Sheikah Slate in her hands and reaching for the dagger at her belt. Inglis on the other hand, could barely suppress a smile, turning swiftly to grab Milagre's arm. "Don't," he said.Link held up his hands, but for a moment did not speak. He wanted to take in what he saw; to observe, and understand, as his months in Hyrule Castle had taught him to do. "I've not come to fight you, Milagre," he eventually said. "But you are making a mistake."Milagre shoved free of Inglis' grip. "You know nothing of me. Either of you!""True, I'll admit it. You were the toughest piece of the puzzle. If you wanted power, you could have had Cinna killed at any time. But I didn't understand until I'd experienced it for myselfm" He lowered his hands. "You love them both. You want what you had with them both.""This is nonsense!" Milagre protested, but the sudden fury on her face told Link that he was right."I understand, I do," he went on. "You want things to be the way they were. Just the three of you, together, and free. So much so that you would wage war for it."The Akkalan had not moved, stuck in Milagre's shadow, though he was blocking her path to the control terminal."The way things were?" Milagre spat. "That is the opposite of what we wanted. For ten thousand years my people were hated by all, simply for disobeying your Princess' ancestor! Cinna is hungry for change, he will remake Hyrule anew, and we will finally have a place within it. When he rules–""Cinna is dead," Link said coldly. "Please, it’s over now."Inglis' face dropped. "How?" he whispered. Milagre was not as easily convinced. She glared at Link with sceptical, hating eyes, as behind her Inglis stood in shock.This was the last thing he wanted, Link realised. Despite everything - all the plotting and lies and gambles to keep himself alive - he'd wanted the trio's friendship as much as anyone else's. "I'm sorry," he said earnestly. "It was quick. He didn’t suffer. If I could have prevented it–""You dare!" Milagre seethed. She surged forward, wrapping a strong hand around Link's neck and shoving him towards the precipice of the platform. "You are an interloper, an imposter. A prisoner who used up his worth. Nothing more than a Knight who thinks himself sharper than his sword.""Mila! Stop! He's telling the truth," Inglis pleaded, grabbing her by the arm and trying to wrench her backwards.Link flailed in the Yiga woman's grip, managing to kick her in the gut. She wailed, stumbling and releasing Link over the edge of the platform. The stone of Vah Ruta's luminous head rushed forward to meet him; reaching for his paraglider, Link held out a hand towards Ruta, and at the last moment, a great gale erupted into the air. His paraglider caught the wind and Link careened upwards back towards the trunk platform.He landed hard, in time to see Inglis try and fail to restrain Milagre from reaching the control terminal. Before he could stop her, she slapped her hand down on the stone. Vah Ruta roared, shaking violently, and without warning she unleashed a second blast of energy. The blistering beam reached its target this time, smashing into the western wing of Hyrule Castle. The explosion sent an enormous black cloud of debris and smoke high into the air, the shockwave reveberating back to them in a matter of sections. Recovering, Link noticed a faint red beam aimed from the rocky cliffs of Eldin and another from Gerudo, and another from Hebra -- pointed directly at them."We need to move!" he shouted, but it was too late.One of the Beasts fired – Link never saw who – its beam striking Ruta's side flank. Link reached for the terminal, managing to grab Inglis with his free hand, but he could not also catch Milagre. He looked up just in time to see her thrown from the trunk, her scream ringing out high and shrill. Inglis cried out, lurching forward to jump after her, but Link held him tight. The Yiga woman fell from sight, and as suddenly as it had began, her screaming stopped.She was at the base of Central Tower, stopping to let her horse drink and catch its breath, when above her the sky caught fire.A lattice of ancient energy crisscrossed overhead, shining bright in its beauty and its terror, as the Divine Beasts traded volleys. Zelda watched in utter disbelief, tears falling to the ground and her hands to her mouth to cover the strangled wail that escape her. The worst had come, worse than she could have ever imagine, worse than anyone could have ever dreamed; Divine Beasts were turned against each other.Vah Ruta had fired first, obliterating Zelda's tower in the west wing of Hyrule Castle, and most of the Royal Apartments. And then it seemed to happen all at once. Vah Rudania had fired, then Naboris, and then Medoh on Rudania, and Naboris on Medoh – the Beasts shrieking under the immense impacts, flame and smoke and ash raining down where each Beast was hit.How? She wanted to ask. How could this happen?What were they thinking?Why were they so willing to destoy each other?Questions she had no time to answer. If she could not find a way to end this, no matter how impossible the feat seemed, then everything - their trials and triumphs, their pain and scars and tears and everything else they had endured - it would all be for nothing. All over again.Not this time around, Zelda thought, and she looked down at the golden mark on her hand.If all else fell away, she would still have the power. And once, I used it to control Medoh, and Rudania too. Perhaps, if by some miracle she was strong enough, she could use it to do the same once more, but with all the Beasts. There would not be time to reach them all. She would need some way to use the power remotely… some way to send out a signal…Zelda looked up to the peak of the Sheikah tower in front of her. There was a terminal on its balcony, she remembered. And this tower was the most central of them all. It was wishful thinking, the definition of it. But what was a wish, if not hope?Heart full, the decision made, Zelda approached Central Tower and began to climb. Hand over hand, from foothold to foothold, as the rains made the ancient metal slick and cold, she climbed, until below her Hyrule grew small, and at last she reached the top; utterly exhausted, soaked through and shivering from the rain, but triumphant.Summoning the last of her strength, she crawled towards the Sheikah terminal.The rain had thickened into hail that battered down against the rocks. For the first time since the winter, it had begun to snow. Only this time the snow stung, bringing pinpricks of pain that somehow, somehow, broke through the numbness he felt.Inglis pushed the wet hair back from Milagre's eyes, but they did not open. He carried her from the water, struggling under her weight, where he was met by the retinue of Zora waiting by the pool, Larella, and Prince Sidon among them. They watched wide-eyed, unsure how to approach the grieving man before them. Should we arrest him? One asked. No, not yet, Inglis heard Larella reply. He is in shock.Shock. Shock that had made him foolish; made him jump. Inglis had wrangled himself free of Link, and had leapt from the trunk down into the waters after her, but Mila was already dead. She had hit Vah Ruta in her fall. Her face was scarred and broken, but her hair was lovely and long as it had always been. Inglis ran his fingers through it, thinking that it felt like silk.Link was ushering him towards the bank, having jumped into the water after him. "Inglis, I'm sorry," he soothed. "I need to take the Sheikah Slate.""It was Rudania," Inglis said suddenly, ignoring Link's words. He fell to his knees, his strength gone at last. "I inducted Yunobo, and he killed her. You killed Ganon, didn't you Link? After he killed the Zora girl you loved? Did… Did it help?"As he took the Sheikah Slate from Milagre's belt, Link said, "I killed him five times over, Inglis. No, it did not help."Behind them, the Beasts had not finished their fighting. Rudania to Naboris, Medoh to Rudania, Naboris to Ruta, yet again. We have to move! Sidon! Someone shouted. Any moment and they might hit us.Inglis did not feel Link turn towards Central Hyrule, did not see that the tower there had begun to turn gold, and did not hear Link instruct Larella and Sidon to stay and watch over him."Zelda is at the tower," Link told them. "That must be her. Whatever she's trying to do, I need to help her."But Inglis did hear ethereal sounds as Link teleported away, and he hoped the others would soon depart too. He could not look away from Mila's face. If he did, she might disappear. The Zora named Larella crouched beside him, gingerly wrapping an arm around him to help him stand."What do the Zora do with their dead?" he asked her."We send them home," Larella answered with a frown. "To the water. But she is Yiga, of the desert, so she will return to the fire. Come, strange child. When the rains stop, we will build a pyre."The terminal was cool beneath her palm; around her, the lights of the tower had turned gold.At first, nothing happened. Zelda wasn't sure if anything would. But she had controlled the Beasts before. Still - her plan went far beyond control.Zelda focused, whispering words of prayer. Father help me, Mother help me. Preserve me now, grant my wish. Let me save them, this last time.Her focus was broken by the silvery sounds of materialisation behind her, and the quiet footsteps along the stone. "Zelda?" His voice brought a lance of pain through her, accompanied by a discordant joy. Fearful, she drew her hand from the terminal."Go, Link," Zelda said cooly. "You should not be here."Link joined her at the terminal and gazed upon the golden lights. "...what are you doing?"She could not help it; there were tears in her eyes now. "Something terrible. Something I don't want you to bear witness to," She placed a gentle hand on his chest to push him away. "I have to do this alone… you never chose any of this–"He drew his sword and placed it between them. From the look in his eyes, he understood."I did choose. I chose to save you, chose to fight for you." With an almost predestined purpose, Link pushed to hilt towards her, urging Zelda to take it in hand. "And I choose now to be by your side.""I have to shut them down, Link," Zelda admitted at last.He took her hand in his, bringing it to the hilt. "I know.""All of them.""I trust you, you don’t need to explain."In the distance, another beam of energy crossed Hyrule; this one from Naboris to Medoh. And then another from Medoh in return.Determined, Zelda at last took the hilt in hand, her other placed on the terminal. Together, their power combined, Link and Zelda issued the order, and for a moment, the sky was gold.In the west, Vah Medoh's propellers went quiet.In the south, Vah Naboris' static dissipated.In the north, Vah Rudania's half-dozen eyes blinked shut.And in the east, Vah Ruta's hail finally ceased.The Beasts were asleep, with permanence this time. Not even their pilots would be able to wake them. Only the power, should Zelda deem it.But it was not just the Beasts. She could sense it. The last little beacon of light was silenced too; the ancient automaton in Kakariko, unable to escape."I'm sorry, Link," Zelda said quietly, running soft fingers against the back of his hand. "My powers… even now I don't have a full grasp on them. I can sense… that I did more than I meant to…"Link's eyes went wide, and he snapped his hands away from the Master Sword, reaching for the Sheikah Slate. No… no, no, no, he was muttering, frantically tapping at the screen in vain hope."It will still work," she informed him, reaching down to retrieve the Sword. "The Towers and the Shrines. They are different from the Beasts somehow. You might yet reach him in time, to say goodbye."The colour had drained from his cheeks, and his mouth bobbed open and shut, but no words came. Zelda handed him the Sword and watched as he hurriedly teleported away, before sinking to the ground to give in to her own tears.The Sheikah had travelled to the Graveyard, and the Yiga too. Link saw a streak of white-gold hair, belonging to the one-eyed woman who was kneeling before the Guardian, and he knew then that it was too late.He ran without thinking, chest feeling as though it might burst, nearly slipping on the mud. The air smelled of smoke and rust. Somehow, after so much, he still hoped. But the lights had already gone out, and the cores were already quiet. His Guardian slept, his five legs tucked in close, and his open eye black.Link's vision blurred as he fell at Rhoamet's side. His throat turned was dry and hoarse from the cry that could only be his own. Wake up now, he sobbed. Wake up now, please. Someone had an arm around his shoulder. He could hear weeping. And somewhere in the haze, was a voice mingled with a dozen others. His father, Zelda, Aurelia, Inglis, Cinelgen… A knowing voice, foreign and familiar, until he realised in the end that it was his own;"He was at peace, at least," he said. "The Goddess was kind."
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
When the clouds cleared, there was nothing to hold back the waning Spring's vibrancy. It filled Hyrule to the brim. The sun and sky were painted in broad brushstrokes of blemishless colour; rivers sang against their banks, and everywhere one could look, there was life. To Link, it felt like an excess of light. And with light came shadow.The journey home had taken days, and the voice had been following him again; you aren't enough, it said, when will you learn that? It was as old and insistent as ever, and it felt like a screw driving its way into his skull. You're just a Knight who thinks himself sharper than his sword!Link expected to be angry – at Zelda or at Cinelgen or at Hyrule itself. Yet he felt a strange weightlessness where the rage would have been. He had expected grief to hit him like a wave as it had before; to fill his lungs, to make his eyes burn. But grief, he now knew, was not a wave in the sea but the whole sea itself. It could be rough, it could be calm, it could drag him down, or it could just let him float – an aimless mote drifting on and on until something reached down to pluck him out.And there she was, come to pull him ashore. Even amongst the blinding landscape, Zelda appeared radiant on the horizon. She was a canvas of gold, white and blue — a goddess — waiting for him at the gates of what once was Castle Town. She wrapped her arms around him when they met, and let him fall into her, speaking gentle words of regret and hesitant hope; we have each other, we will always have each other.As they walked, he sensed the weight in her footfalls. The way she leaned into him as much as he did her. She was grieving too, he suddenly understood. Across Hyrule, the Sheikah Towers and Shrines had begun to flicker out like stars at dawn. Link had heard on the road that the Shrines were beginning to disappear entirely, descending down, down, down into the earth, never to return. The kingdom had lost some of its wonders, he mused, and it was by all her hand.When they reached the fountain at the centre of Castle Town, he stopped to sit down on the fountain edge, pulling Zelda down to join him. With what felt like the last of his strength, he wrapped his arms around her and held her tight, as though she was the only precious thing he had. He felt the embrace returned, and for a long time, neither of them spoke. In the ruined town, they floated through the grief together.Zelda was the first to speak, mumbling the words into his shoulder. "I'm sorry," was all she could begin with. "I'm so sorry.""I know," Link said, trying his best to sound reassuring. “It’s okay.”She pulled away, and he was met her lovely, strained face. Under furrowed brows, her eyes were seeking, almost interrogative."You know, if you want to go, you can go," she said softly. "I never officially released you from my service, but I can if you want."Link was already shaking his head. "I chose to stay.""That was before–""Where would I go?""Link…" her stern eyes had become lost. "If you're not happy…""I'll figure that out in time, Zel,” he said, before moving to gently bring her head back to his shoulder. Running a hand through her hair, he found that she'd begun to braid it again. He threaded a finger over the soft ridges where the plaits snaked across her crown, and for a moment, he felt at peace. This is what makes me happy for now. What came next could wait until he was done holding her."Happy," Zelda murmured to herself. "I doubt anyone is happy with us right now. One of Teba's scouts returned from Gerudo this morning. She told us that Lady Riju was almost trapped within Vah Naboris. I can only imagine what happened to the others.""We can to talk to them," Link suggested. "Make them understand."Zelda sighed, giving him another squeeze before unravelling herself."Sometimes all we can do is talk, but it's the one thing no one ever does." She cast her eyes towards the horizon, "Well, not this Kingdom. If I am Princess, they will talk."If the day before had been a dream, Larella could not know.One moment she had been standing with Sidon at Ruta's Plateau, checking on the state of his Divine Beast. The next, near half a dozen bandits stormed towards them with speed and force. The Prince threw himself into the fray, managing to hold off the attackers long enough to turn with flaming, frantic eyes and shout, run! And Larella had run, but when she returned, Sidon was gone, and Ruta was filling the air with ice.What followed was an assault, culminating in a Battle of the Beasts, as if a second Calamity had come. And then, a miracle and an apocalypse both; the sky had been enveloped by a golden light, and Larella felt what she knew was the power of the gods. Sidon didn't even need to look at Ruta to know; once the light receded, so too did the power of his Divine Beast.Now, the entire kingdom was held in suspension, stagnated with shock. Even the Akkalan Inglis remained. He had been one of the attackers, but Link assured her he was trustworthy. And the way Inglis wept for that woman that they had given to the pyre, the very woman who had used Vah Ruta to attack Hyrule Castle - it had stolen the breath from Larella's lungs just looking at him. So much death and loss on all sides; how could she condemn a child for his grief?Together with the rest of the Domain, she watched and waited for news from the Castle, but in the meantime, she returned to her mission - sitting Sidon in his rightful place as King of Zora's Domain. For weeks now, their mornings began with research, breakfast taken with books in hand; poring over records and regulations, unravelling the knot that was the Zora monarchy.Larella had tried to argue that with the end of the siege, the war was over, and Sidon should take the crown. No such luck; Muzu refused to declare the fighting done. She had demanded to see written proof of his ascension, but Muzu claimed not to need it. The Council knows what it wants, he said. And that is safety from these Gerudo.However, the petty squabble they had with the Gerudo was nothing against the death of their Divine Beast. Larella would be unfit to call herself a diplomat if she did not take an opportunity when it arose, no matter how tragic.Once the initial panic had subsided, she managed to secure an audience with the court, and now stood at Sidon's side in the throne room of Zora's Domain. The Regent Muzu glared down at them from his marble and azure throne."Tell us true then," he commanded. "The Beast is asleep?"Larella braced for Sidon's reply. He was a pariah in isolation; a man in crimson scales bringing crimson news."Not just asleep, Muzu," Sidon said, a mighty fist balled across his chest. "Vah Ruta is dead."The announcement was met with an uproar. The courtiers called for retribution; high wails echoed through the audience chamber, ringing clearer than steel against steel."Noble people of the Domain!" Larella called out, raising her hands in a vain attempt to calm them. "There is no gain in unchecked rage! We must remain-"But her voice was drowned out in the furore until Muzu gestured to the pair of warriors that flanked the throne. They drummed their silver spears against the floor and shouted, "Enough!"As soon as the shouting was quelled, Larella nudged Sidon to speak. The Prince cleared his throat, and spoke the words they had prepared together; "We need to put aside our differences with the other races. A tragedy has occurred, more fighting would only harm us!"The Regent sniffed at them. "By my count, Vah Ruta was hit five times, on all sides!" he crowed. "You want me to make peace? Now?""Not you, Regent," Larella pointed towards Sidon. "The only person who can make peace is our rightful King!"The chamber erupted once more, and above the noise came Muzu's shrill cries of, "You dare!"Ignoring the chaos, the Prince stepped forward, taking a deep breath as Larella had taught him, and he spoke so loud and clear that she could feel the floors thrum."You must step aside, Regent!" he announced, gesturing powerfully around the room, his scales shining. "Our people are tired of fighting! Is war all you can give us?""Of course not!" Muzu spat."Then what else have you given us? A failed siege? Crippled trade? Over a spat?" he slammed a fist into his palm, the sound cracking the air. "Well, I say enough!"The sea of faces before them began to shift, the expressions of the court turning from indignation to reverence to awe. This is the King they want, Larella thought. If only I could prove it to them."Enough?" Muzu cried. He slapped a fin against an arm of his throne, "It is enough when I say it is enough!" His round eyes were furious, narrow slits, and Larella could see the scales on his face begin to tinge with red. They had him on the defensive; time to move once more."When will you give us proof of the Council's decision?" Larella demanded. "Every previous King has done so since before His Majesty Dorephan’s own grandfather!”Muzu was prepared for the question. "There is no law that I must do so. We held a vote, and I was named Regent," he stood slowly from the chair, looking down his nose at the young Zora before him. "While you complain, I am keeping the peace. For your own good, children, you will challenge me no further."There was nothing more to be done, but Larella had seen the eyes of the court. They were afraid of what had occurred between the Beasts. And fear was powerful, so much so that it could be a force for good.Evening found her in the records hall again, searching through the ponderous tomes. Inglis and Sidon arrived to assist her, bringing a pot of soup and a plate of salt-seared fish for their supper."You should go home, Inglis," she told the Hylian. "Go where you can grieve-""I don't have a home yet," Inglis shrugged. And I want to stay, help where I can."Larella had tactfully sidestepped the Court's questions as to who Inglis was. She called him a friend of Link's and the Ambassador to Zelda's Hylians in Hyrule Castle, and they seemed happy enough with that."There is no burden-" she began, but the Akkalan shook his head and plonked the bowl of soup down onto the table."I broke Link's trust, and I never want to do that again.""He has that effect on people," Sidon grinned, busying himself by clearing the table of books and setting out the plates. "You know what occurred here, don't you Inglis? And in the desert?"Inglis had not, and so Sidon recounted the tales over supper of Link and Zelda's adventures and exploits in the Domain and beyond; the way they had cleansed Vah Medoh, and raced into the desert to prevent an altercation between the Zora and Gerudo.Larella had only been half listening, her eyes skimming a legal record, trying to extract something of use - until she saw it. Tucked away in a miscellany act, with amendments some four hundred years old, it read;A previously informal bureaucratic act or process may be considered law with immediate effect if it can be shown the practice has occurred for no less than three hundred years.The footnotes told that this prevented new kings from subverting tradition."This is it!" Larella cried, nearly exploding from her chair. She rummaged through her documents left on a nearby desk and found the record of Councillors and Kings for the past four hundred years. Whenever a Council elected a King, the vote was made official by a signed document. It was the proof they needed - at last!She did not bother seeking an audience the next morning. When the court met as they did by routine, she stormed into the chamber with both the documents and Sidon in tow."There is a precedent, Muzu!" she said, interrupting the proceedings. "Four hundred years of it!"Larella marched up to the throne and held the miscellany act to his face, before taking it around the room."If you have no record, you cannot be King," Sidon explained coolly, lips upturned in a satisfied smile. "It is law."The Regent could not speak; he sat on the marble throne he had usurped with an open mouth and watery eyes. With a hopeful smile and tightly-balled fists, Sidon turned to the court and said, "I am my father’s son, and someday shall be your king! I ask the Councillors to consider me favourably!"Through the murmurs that followed, Muzu's booming voice cut across the chamber. "No - councillors, organise to sign this document immediately if that is what is required! I have the majority!"Larella could not hide her smile then, for no one in the court moved an inch. Their refusal was clear."I will not, Muzu," announced one of the Councillors - a thin old man named Jiahto with a crisp accent and rings that sat loose on his thin fingers. "Your actions have jeopardised trade across the entire Kingdom. I will support the Prince as our ruler!"The Regent looked like an animal in a snare. He nervously eyed the rest of the court, seeming to shrink into the throne as more and more agreed with the portly Councillor."Why deny the young man?" said one Councillor."The Ambassador's proof is sound, Muzu," said another.The court cried out, calling for Sidon's ascension. It did not take long; Muzu's own guards muscled him from the throne and made him stumble down towards the dais.He glared at Larella. "You. I remember when you were an attendant. I could have you beaten, and beheaded for what you have done!"Larella had never felt taller, or indeed stronger than she did at that moment. She crouched down to meet Muzu's eye level, and sneered,"Men like you don't scare me, Muzu. I've known worse threats, real threats. I have the scars to prove it. So threaten me again — an innocent woman and friend of the late King Dorephan — and see how far that gets you."With measured steps Sidon approached the towering marble and silver throne, and next to it even he seemed small. Larella recalled his father then, the formidable King Dorephan who had always been kind to her, and despite their victory, she felt the late king’s absence keenly.“Goddess save me,” Sidon said quietly, so that only Larella could hear. “I still feel too young.”Larella watched as he turned to the court anyway and stood in front of his father’s throne. He took a moment to look upon their faces, and then he spoke with a voice that she knew came direct from his heart.“Zora’s Domain has been steeped in tragedy for over a century. Our Princess was taken from us, and then our King, and then our Divine Beast, and now we lose even more of ourselves by waging war. I would like to lead us back into peace!”The court listened intently, their eyes shining. Some were enraptured, others turning away in disgust. It would be impossible to get everyone on their side so soon, Larella knew, but this did not daunt her. An Ambassador’s greatest pride was the challenge of winning people over. “I am not ready to name myself your King,” Sidon continued, making his admission freely. “I have much to learn and many voices to listen to, and I hope to earn the title someday – but until then I hope you can trust me to lead Zora’s Domain as best as I can, into a new era of unity!”He raised a balled fist and flashed a brilliant smile, and soon there was cheering in the chamber that echoed out across the waters of the Domain – up and over the waterfalls, towards the skies above.By late evening, the celebrations that followed were finally beginning to wind down. Even with the threat of war still present, the Zora could not resist a feast. Muzu was not condemned to a cell but was rather stripped of his status as a noble. His punishment, Sidon deemed, was to see the Domain thrive in the absence of his input.Larella and Sidon watched the last of the feast from a gazebo above the plaza, standing arm in arm and enjoying a moment of quiet."I don't deserve what I've been given," Sidon sighed. "If anyone should rule, it is you. This was all your doing, after all.""We can't all be Kings and Queens, Sidon," Larella said. "Some of us are happy just to help."Their peace was broken then by the sounds of hurried, splashing footsteps, as Inglis raced along the path with a letter in hand, delivered just then by a courier with great urgency. It was addressed to the ruler of Zora's Domain.Larella tried to read Sidon's expression as he opened the letter, but she could not parse it. For once, his hooded yellow eyes revealed little."Zelda has called a summit of the leaders of Hyrule," he finally told them, handing the letter to Larella. "She doesn't know what has happened here."Larella read the neat handwriting; Whoever this letter reaches, I invite the ruler of Zora's Domain to come to Hyrule Castle...Larella grinned, clutching the letter tight. "Then let's bring her the good news."For a moment, Zelda thought she saw snow. Twin flecks on the horizon, followed by a third, until she realised exactly who it was soaring in from the west: Teba of Lake Totori, accompanied by his beloved family. The sight put Zelda more at ease than she had felt in days.She had been standing in what once was her bedroom - now a haunt of rubble and dust after Vah Ruta had destroyed it - where the breach in Hyrule Castle opened out to the west. In moments of uncertainty, Zelda could come here to gaze upon the Hebra Mountains. It was there that she had found her strength. There must be at least some left for it to give.The Rito had come without even been summoned. While Zelda had told no one that she was the cause of the Beast's death, Teba had surmised it immediately. But he had not come to scold her."You will get enough complaints from the others," he warned once pleasantries had been exchanged. "I just wanted to know you're okay, Sparrow."Okay. Perhaps Zelda was okay. Her life was no longer in peril. Ganon showed no signs of returning. A rogue Gerudo no longer wandered her country, setting fire to her people's homes. And despite what she had taken from him, Link had remained at her side. On paper, things were going great."A ruler does not get to choose how she feels," Zelda told him.Teba knelt down before her so that their eyes met, and he placed a wide wing on her shoulder. "A ruler may not be able to choose, but Zelda can. And you're not a ruler yet, Sparrow. Don't forget that."I am ruler of this Castle, at least. Not that it had much use, anymore. The task of even making Hyrule Castle habitable had proved an enormous so far. By day, Link and Zelda surveyed the damage with the help of the meagre number of people who had taken residence within — no more than three dozen. By night, they all supped in Dining Hall. The men and women loyal to her now were either Goron brawlers belonging to Yunobo, Rito in Teba's network of scouts, or former bandits of Cinelgen's. In a twist of irony, his outcasts had become Zelda's outcasts; it was only fair that she learn their names, and their stories. As a bard would, she could not help but think.The Gorons, she discovered, enjoyed singing, and led rounds of old working tunes their fathers had taught them, their favourite being a rowdy number called the Shining Mine to which Zelda never quite caught all the words. In this mine there was a rock, a rare rock, a shinin’ rock… Go-ro, the shining mine, the mine down in the canyon oh…Teba’s Rito scouts weren’t talkative outside of updates from the road, but they did want to hear stories of her time with him in Hebra, seeking her out at dinner to ask how Teba braved the Plunge and how he has flown Vah Medoh into the heavens. They really revered him, she realised, almost as much as they despised their Elder Kaneli, of whom they had nothing nice and plenty mean to say.Finally the half dozen or so Hylians who had remained liked the least to speak to her. Still, she caught them in hallways between tasks, or found them walking the grounds in their downtime, and gradually began to learn their names and their histories. She found, for the most part, they were only as old as her, with little experience in the world, and could not fully recall how they had come to be at Hyrule Castle with Cinelgen.“By the Goddesses grace I will regret that I ever followed him,” said a woman named Mina when she and Zelda stood together by the hearthfire in the Dining Hall one evening, being the most outgoing of the group. Her brother Mills was stood beside her, and said sadly, “We never wanted to hurt anyone, but we did, didn’t we?”Zelda did not want to know if the siblings had indeed personally hurt anyone. “Those hard times are past,” she told them. “I am glad you are here now. This castle was once home to many.”“It will be again if we can ever get it fully cleaned up!” Mina had said.To their credit, Mina, Mills and all the others had done a fine job. The Castle, or at least the throne room, was now presentable for the guests they were expecting.Those who had been invited to the Castle arrived over the coming week - Elder Kaneli and the bard Kass came first, having received the letter less than a day after Teba's departure from Hebra. Then came Yunobo and Bludo, the latter of which complained at having to travel so far with such a bad back. A train of wagons was next, carrying Reede of Hateno and Impa of Kakariko, accompanied by her grand-daughter Paya. Buliara and Riju arrived alone, both hooded and refusing to speak to anyone until they laid eyes on Zelda and Link.Riju was too anxious to begin with pleasantries. "I got your letter," she said apologetically. "I won't ever forget what it said.""It isn’t me you should apologise to," Zelda said, and the little Chief nodded slowly."We will atone, I swear it," she said, before being ushered away to Buliara. “And rebuild, as you are.”Aurelia and a few of her Yiga soon arrived too, ferrying the body of Cinelgen to give to the Gerudo. She scowled at the Castle when she passed through its gates, calling the place cursed. When Zelda asked what she meant, the Yiga woman pointed to her leather eye-patch and said,"It takes more than it gives. I hope you have a lot of muster, little Queen,” she said, and laughed at Zelda's stunned expression, pulling a banana from her pouch to munch on as she settled her horse.The last to arrive brought the biggest surprise; Larella announcing that they were in the presence of the Heir to Zora’s Domain and its presiding ruler, Prince Sidon, along with the Akkalan named Inglis. By Link's account, Zelda had expected him to be near catatonic, having lost his mentor and lover in one day. But Inglis carried in his spirit a low burning flame of hope, and Zelda saw it grow when he was reunited with his friends.Link and Inglis shared a bear hug, the Knight bracketing his friend by the shoulders and grinning wide as the sea when he beheld him. Glad you’re here, buddy, he said. Me too, answered the Akkalan with his trademark sad smile. Then it was Aurelia’s turn to greet him, and their standoff was much less warm.“So, it was you,” Inglis said.Aurelia’s voice was cool as ice. “Yes. You know it had to be done,” She approached him then, a hand on his shoulder. “But I will not begrudge you your grief.”Inglis shook himself free of her. “I’ll spend my life trying to understand you, Aury.”With a genial squeeze of her hand, and then two light slaps of her palm against his cheek, she said, “Who says you’ll see that much of me, Inglis?”And they separated with the Akkalan fuming and the Yiga biting her lip to suppress her smile.The arrival of all their guests to the castle heralded that the talks could begin. And so, on a warm morning in the late-Spring, Zelda called them all to the throne room. The people of Hyrule Castle had replaced the planks across the hole in the throne room floor and had cleaned the place of the debris, and the blood left over from the Castle's takeback. The banners were still rotting, and the high windows of the hall were still mostly broken, but at least the room did not look like a battlefield.She waited for the attendees beneath the balcony, wanting as she had before to meet them eye to eye rather than from the throne. Thankfully, despite the season, the air in the throne room was cool; Zelda had deigned to wear her Rito Coat, even if it was more suited to winter. She had found an old, golden necklace bearing the royal bird of Hyrule, and she wore it now as the only symbol of her status. Rito Princess, Cinelgen had once called her. It did not matter. The coat made her feel strong, as though it were armour of steel and not wool.One by one their guests entered the room, forming a line before her. Those who had not been to the castle were hesitant to step onto the wooden planks, and if Zelda were honest with herself, she would be too. All that stood between them and a hundred foot drop are a few rows of pine.But still she took a step forward, hearing her own boots click against the planks, and she began,"I know the question you have asked, and I know I have withheld the answer from you. But it was only fair that you hear it together," She took another step forward; Link remained at her side, never more than a foot away. "I am not condemning any one pilot or people, and it was not the Zora who destroyed part of this Castle, but an interloper and a bandit who wrenched control of the Beast with the intent to stir conflict."Riju pushed through to the front of the crowd, the bells and jewels of her formal Gerudo attire jingling audibly when she moved. "Cinelgen?" she pressed. "Your letter said he was dead."Zelda nodded, and passing her eyes to Inglis, who was standing with Aurelia and the Yiga, she said, "... it was an associate. But Cinelgen and his bandits are no more.""So what happened?" pressed Elder Kaneli of the Rito, an air of curiosity rather than indignation in his voice.It hurt to speak. The pain of regret was still strong, and already Zelda could feel the support of her allies waning. Yet Link's quiet strength at her side was the pillar in which she found her own. Adjusting her Rito coat, she began to explain,"I take responsibility, firstly, for allowing a man like Cinelgen so much power in the first place. I left this castle to ruin, and it was taken by opportunists. By the Goddesses grace there were few bandits here in the end. If we can rebuild Hyrule, then its ruins will again flow with life, and where there is life, there is community, and safety, and hope.”This part was well-received, the delegates nodding along to her words. The next part would likely not go down as well. “But that aside, we as a Kingdom are responsible. Our bickering and infighting, our misjudgments, and hesitation. When we turned on each other due to a misunderstanding and due to fear, I had no choice. I made a choice," She held up her right hand and showed the crowd the golden crest. "Your Champions will have already guessed. By the power of the Goddess, the Divine Beasts are asleep, and without power.” She caught sight of Impa and Paya at the edge of the crowd, watching with agelessly solemn faces. "As are the Towers, and the Shrines.""Wait - you killed our Divine Beast!?” Kaneli cried. He pointed a wing towards the Rito Warrior, who started backwards, but could not protest before the Elder said, "Teba was defending your Castle, and this is how you repay us?""How long have you been able to do this?" Riju demanded, scowling at Zelda's golden mark. "Why give us our Beasts only to take them away?"Even Sidon looked conflicted. Crossing his arms over his chest, he said with a frown, "I have to agree - will you ever return them to us?""I don't know," Zelda could feel herself shrinking from them, wishing now she had sat in her throne after all."When it is safe," Link said, shooting her a concerned look. "Then and not before."He had sidled in close to her so that their shoulders kissed. An invisible encouragement: I am here."Well, we were content to never wake ours," bemoaned Bludo. "I don't know why you gave it to Yunobo, to be honest!""H-hey I was just… I'm sorry!" The young Goron looked shocked just to hear his own name. "I wanted to protect the Castle, honest, and-""You should have left the Beasts as they were!" Bludo argued, and Zelda saw Riju and Kaneli nod in agreement. "You should never have interfered! We were just fine before!"“We needed Vah Naboris to protect ourselves!” countered Riju.“We need Vah Ruta for our water supply!” Sidon added.“Vah Medoh could have changed our whole courier network!” Kaneli whined.“And I kinda liked mine!” said Yunobo."Stop! Listen to yourselves!" A shout thundered across the throne room from the back wall, and the crowd shifted towards its source; Inglis of Akkala, his face stern and determined, marching across the planks to stand by Zelda's side. "You have nothing but complaints. Link and Zelda made a choice that saved you all. It saved this entire Kingdom from destruction. All of you were there when it happened. One mistimed attack from a Divine Beast and we’d reduce Hyrule to ash!”The crowd before him were stunned and open-mouth - though at the back of the room, Zelda saw Aurelia smiling.Inglis went on, "I've heard their story. Many of you know parts of it. All the ways they helped you, without asking for anything in return," He looked back to Link with a wry smile. "They aren’t perfect. They have made mistakes. And I know it's easy to lie, but I believe them when they say they tried to make the right choice.”No one spoke, the throne room silent save the sounds of the attendees shuffling where they stood, eyes meeting eyes as they took in what Inglis had said — until Teba stepped forward."I believe as well," he said. With a scowl, he turned back towards the other Champions. "You lived your whole lives without those Beasts. They don't bring in food, they don't keep your families warm. We're alive because they died, simple as that." He pointed towards Link and Zelda. "I stand by their decision."A large hand shot up from amongst the Gorons. "You-you know what! Me too!" Yunobo hurried to join Teba on wooden planks, startling the warrior as his enormous weight caused them to shift and wobble. "You know, it was fun while it lasted. But Rudania brought us more trouble than good. He's gone now, Bludo, isn't he? That's what you wanted?"Then it was Sidon who moved forward to meet the others on the planks. "I must accept it, I suppose. I am sad to lose Ruta, but at least I know she is no longer in danger."The little Chief was hesitant to walk forward, but when she did she held her head high. She gave them a conceding, yet assured look. "Maybe I don't agree, but I understand. What other way was there to end it?"Paya was leading her grandmother forward then, the Sheikah needing no words to give their support. Together they bowed low and stood tall. Reede was next, stepping confidently onto the wooden planks.Last came Aurelia of Karusa Valley, moving cat-like as she paced quietly behind the Sheikah. She gave Zelda a quick salute and waited with an arm on her hip and amused look to see what would happen next.They stood together then, the people of Hyrule gathered on those precarious wooden beams that held up their kingdom. Zelda looked at them in amazement. Was it time?“For what was lost, I apologise again,” she said. “The Divine Beasts saved Hyrule, more times than we may ever know. And now they must rest. I ask now for your help to rebuild. I ask…”She took a deep breath. Did she really want this? Was Impa’s advice — given on a rainy morning nearly half a year ago — still sound? That in order to rebuild, she must also lead. Zelda had worked so singularly towards this goal for so long, and now the moment had come:“I ask that you recognise me as the Princess of Hyrule. United, our Kingdom can recover from this tragedy. But torn apart… we may be doomed to repeat it.”"I would be the first," Inglis of Akkala said, and before Zelda could speak, he went to his knees. "If for no other reason than Link and Zelda are our best hope for something better." The look in his eyes was an apology; was he bowing or begging? He peered over his shoulder towards the gathered people behind him. "I know I am not alone."Aurelia was the first to join him, as she had pledged to do. Soon, Teba followed, and then Sidon, and Larella, as with Zelda's own constituents, and the Sheikah too. Reede was next, as were Riju and Buliara until finally, Kaneli and even Bludo were on their knees.Zelda sensed Link shift, and lower, but she seized his arm. "No, don't," she whispered with disbelief. "They're not bowing to me. They're bowing to us.""Us," Link breathed. "But I'm not-"She gave his hand a squeeze. "Afraid, are you?"Link shook his head, a smile broadening on his face. "Never," he assured her. “If I'm with you."Her voice booming through the hall, Zelda addressed the people before her."Stand then, if this is your wish. There is much work to do," she said to them, the once disparate denizens of a Kingdom lost, now hers and Link's in earnest - and when they stood, they stood as one.There was to be no coronation. Zelda had found in her father's journal the account of his own; Rhoam said little about the event, calling it superfluous but necessary. But with no court priest or officiator to conduct the proceedings, Zelda determined that necessary was a subjective term. Hyrule did not need that she wear a crown; Hyrule needed to be rebuilt.The summit lasted another week. As heir to Zora’s Domain, Sidon officially announced the retreat of the Zora from the conflict, and Chief Riju made a formal apology for her short-sighted decision to destroy the Geldarm Bridge, and together they ended the war between the East and the South. Zelda pardoned Elder Kaneli and the Rito for their involvement with Cinelgen, and Bludo announced that he had forgiven the Kingdom as a whole for 'this mess you lot made!'Even Reede of Hateno Village congratulated Zelda on the success of the summit."Hyrule has a Princess once again," he smiled cooly. "The work does not end here though, you know."“I have no doubt,” Zelda told him. “I know earning your loyalty won’t be as easy as all that.”“I didn’t bow in jest, Princess. You show promise,” he tipped his straw hat at her. “Hateno looks forward to the prosperity your reign will bring.”Afterwards, Impa sought Link and Zelda out privately, grandiose speeches not being of her character. "Your father would be proud this day, Zelda, from his place in the Beyond with your mother," the Elder said. She placed a gentle hand on Zelda’s cheek, her skin soft and cool. "You and your Knight have saved so much, in the face of so much lost."Indeed all had lost something in the years since the Calamity. So in veneration, Zelda took the people gathered at Hyrule Castle to the Sacred Grounds and lit pairs of blue and white lanterns in memory for their fallen Champions, and any others they had lost. She held her own white lantern close in hand; it was her Father and Mother, her baby brother, and Lexo the Bard as well. Link's blue lantern was his family and his friends, his Guardian, and the memories he would never recover. And at last, they all hung their lanterns in a tree together; an array of stars added to an already full sky.Soon the horses were saddled once again, and the wagons were readied for the summiteers to depart. United was a concept; the people of Hyrule still had homes at the corners of the world. United, in truth, would take time. Even Aurelia, whose people had no home, could not be convinced to stay. There were more Yiga out there, she explained, those not caught up in Cinelgen’s regime; she intended to find them and build a new Yiga who would not oppose the Royal Family, but aid it in bringing about peace.“I spent a long time cooped up here, Princess, and I miss to wind of the wild on my face,” Aurelia had said. “From what I’ve heard about you from your Link, you would understand.”But not everyone had a place out in Hyrule just yet. The Castle was too large for just Link and Zelda; she was determined to retain at least some of her allies.She sought Larella first, at the Gates of Hyrule Castle, as around them the Castle was abuzz with activity, the sound of chatter and neighing and adventure floating through the air. To Zelda’s surprise, the pair were standing with their hands entwined, outside the large silver carriage that would take them home. When the Ambassador saw Zelda approach, she stood on her tip toes to give Sidon a kiss on the cheek, and then gently ushered him inside the carriage. She stood with her long, jewelled hands clutched at her chest, as the driver took his place atop the carriage, and signalled for the four horses required to pull it to begin on their way. Once they were gone, Larella turned and bowed to Zelda.“Good day to you, my Princess. When do we begin?”Zelda didn’t quite know what to say. She had remembered Larella’s promise to help Zelda rebuild, but had not expected it to be kept with so much humility. “Larella, if you wish to be with Sidon–”The Ambassador shook her head, cerulean fins swaying casually about her face. “Sidon believes he is not yet capable, but he is. Being thrown in the proverbial deep end may help him see this.”She knelt down in front of Zelda, and bowed her head again. When she raised it, there was an unmistakable twinkle in her eye that Zelda recognised as excitement, joy even. “Princess, I was raised to be a diplomat. We count our achievements by the posts we earn. To leave behind the petty politics of Zora’s Domain and set my sights on the glorious chessboard that is this kingdom? There is no greater honour.”Zelda couldn’t hold back her smile then. “Well, I’m glad one of us is looking forward to it.”The Zora Ambassador stood, and raised too balled fists. “Excellent. Okay, where to start? How about… schools! People love schools, and there aren’t any anymore, since the Calamity.”Zelda balled her own fists, trying to match Larella’s exuberance at the thought of politics and governing. “Schools it is!” she cried, realising she was earnestly interested in the idea. “Approved!”Larella clapped her hands, and set off to find somewhere to set up and office and begin on her master plan for the Kingdom.Next she found Teba in an old training yard, observing his Rito scouts practicing their archery skills. He appraised them with a disapproving eye, occasionally giving them the same orders he’d given Zelda over their difficult and storied Winter. Your eye! He barked. Aim with your eye.He gave Zelda a quick nod when she siddled in next to him and returned to observing the scouts.“They’re good,” Zelda said. “Bullseye nearly every time.”“Yeah? Well good is the enemy of perfect.”“I don’t think that’s how the saying goes.”"No? Huh," Teba huffed. "You know me. Always expecting more.""I do know you," Zelda smiled. “And, I have something for you.”This got his attention, and he looked back down to see what she had brought.Zelda placed a hand on her chest and focused her power. Soon an orb of light was collecting in her hand, whiter and brighter than snow. "Link thought it would make more sense if I passed this onto you. It belonged to an old friend, you see, and now, it belongs to a new one."She held the shining orb in front of her, between her open palms, and nodded for Teba to take it. Apprehensively, Teba gingerly extended a wingtip towards the shining light. "What is this?""A power belonging to the Champions of old. Riju and Sidon already have theirs. We passed Yunobo's onto Bludo since Yunobo technically already carries that power…" her voice trailed off, until Teba took hold of the ball of light, and somewhat daringly pressed it into his chest. "It's a gale, Teba. Revali's Gale."At that moment, a column of air sprung up around the warrior. He opened his wings, letting the updraft ruffled his feathers. The scouts in the training yard had stopped their practice, and were gasping at the spectacle. Zelda smiled to herself; Teba’s legend in their eyes was only about to grow."Thank you, Zelda," Teba said once the gale had dissipated. "This gift is an honour.""Ah - It's not just a gift. It's a trade."Teba raised his brows, and Zelda allowed herself a single moment of weakness to plead,"Stay, Teba. I need people here," she said, the words and their sincerity coming out in a rush.The warrior seemed caught off guard. He shook his head, "You don't need me as an advisor. I'm old and too-""Blunt? Good!" Zelda said. "I don't need an advisor, I have Larella. I want a friend. Someone to keep me sane, and make sure I'm not doing anything stupid."Teba chuckled at that, "It'd be blind leading the blind there.""I'm serious," she chided him. "Before what happened with the Beasts, you could have remained home with Medoh. But now…" Zelda wrapped her arms around herself, rubbing the wool of her Rito coat. "He doesn't need you anymore. Hyrule needs you, as do I."She saw his guarded expression falter, but it did not break. "And what of Link? Isn't he a friend?""Link is...I love him, I do," Zelda admitted."But…" Teba said slowly."But we both know what love does to fair judgement.”The pair exchanged a weighty look, understanding clear between them. The warrior shrugged, conceding. "We sure do," he said. After a moment's contemplation, casting an eye back towards the scouts who had resumed their training, he said, "My family will stay with me.""Naturally," Zelda agreed. "Saki was once an advisor to Kaneli, wasn't she? She could be in my employ here then. And Tulin can learn to shoot or sew, or anything he wants."The warrior nodded, happy with this offer. But then he furrowed his brow, a wingtip scratching his beak, and Zelda worried he’d find some new reason to refuse, until he said,"I get an official title?""I'd name you Battlemaster, if I had any battles left to fight.""There will always be another," Teba told her. "Battlemaster will do just fine."In the last of his journal entries, King Rhoam had begun to address his writings to his daughter. Perhaps he knew that a wedge had been driven between them and wanted in some way to reach her, or perhaps he was merely collating the knowledge he knew he needed to pass on. Zelda read every single letter, and knew that even in death, he was never far from her. Her forgiveness was without question now, despite everything. It was the only way she could find a place for Rhoam in her heart.A Kingdom is a forest, Zelda, her father had written. It grows slowly and is never truly complete.Where it had once been scattered, Hyrule began to grow into a whole; the progress was slow, but the promise was abundance. Plans were drawn among Link, Zelda, Teba and Larella to repair roads, found new villages, plant gardens, and breathe new life into a Hyrule that had slept for a long time. The Hyruleans were a people with a century of wandering to their name, and they called for a home. They called for a place to stand still, to leave a mark, to become something more than a face on the road. Link and Zelda dedicated themselves to in all waking hours to forging that place.North to south, east to west; Letters soared across the Kingdom as Teba set his Rito to expanding the courier network. At any one moment, their vibrant feathers could be spotted on the horizon. Zora's Domain was soon reopened; regular correspondence from Sidon told of his fledgeling but spirited reign, and also invited them to save the date for the next Champion's Day, which was now only a few months away. Letters from Chief Riju had too reached the Castle; construction had already begun on a new bridge. We are considering naming it after Naboris, she had written.With the conflict ended, trade recommenced across Hyrule, much to the relief of Dr Purah in particular, who had written to Zelda to personally thank her. Short of starting my own quarry, I was running out a ways to acquire the rare gems I need for my research, her letter said. You ought to stop by and see it for yourself.Word from Goron City reached Link and Zelda as well; they were doing well as usual and had nothing special to report. But this is the way the boss likes it, Yunobo had added. So don't worry about us!Even Aurelia took the time to write. It was a short note; Settled near Tarrey Town for now. Been raining for nearly a week. Tell the Akkalan his home is even drearier than he is.Closer to home, work soon began on the plans to repair the destroyed parts of Hyrule Castle. Uncomfortable claiming the entire structure for herself, Zelda wondered if it could find new purposes: Link had befriended the first friendly Guardian in a century there, after all, and surely there were other scholars in Hyrule who would like somewhere central to conduct their research. Hudson of Tarrey Town himself eventually made the journey to Hyrule Castle to assess the work needed, and his report on the needed repairs was a novella."Boy howdy, you’re gonna need supplies," he'd laughed as he handed it over. "A Kingdom's worth! Hope you've got a good axe!"Link and Zelda could barely catch their breath. They left Teba and Larella in charge of the Castle as they travelled to search for the last remaining signs of Malice. With each Ritual, Zelda continued to look for the memory that the hooded woman had spoken of. Your Knight struggles with himself, she had said. There is something he must see.Wielding the power of the Other Place was difficult at first; there was so much time that finding anything to focus on was a feat in of itself. She started with pieces that she could remember; her own childhood, and then her time with Link before the Calamity, searching further and further, exploring memories that belonged to family, and then friends, and then strangers."Link spoke of his Father," Zelda explained to the hooded woman. "I'm sure that one of his memories is the key. But I don't even know what he looks like…""That is a requirement, unfortunately," the hooded woman said. "This is an archive, true, but like any library, one must know where to look."The answer came in a stopover in Hateno Village. Zelda wanted to discuss with Reede the possibility of building the school Larella had so enthusiastically suggested. Link on the other hand had come to hand over the Sheikah Slate to Purah, its resident expert, given that it too had begun to malfunction at last. To their dismay, they tested one of the remote bombs, and found it barely had enough power to break a potted vase.“It’s alright, not everything lasts forever, Linky,” Purah said, in between scribbling notes in her research journal. “But we salvage what we can. Speaking of, I need a favour…” she mucked about in her workshop for a few minutes before unearthing and handing Link an old wooden torch. “Be a dear. The furnace has gone out again.”The trip to Hateno offered Link and Zelda a few days in the quiet town, and while they were there, Link decided to clean out his home for the first time since he'd purchased it. Zelda was helping him empty out one of the sheds behind the house, listening to him report on his and Purah’s findings, and whether Zelda would mind having a look at the Slate to see if she can get it working, when suddenly he fell silent.His hands were clutched around a small portrait, no bigger than his palm. It was faded, the wood nearly rotted away, but the picture had been preserved by the glass, and when Zelda looked, she saw a young Hylian couple with a baby boy; his hair an ashen blonde, and his eyes bright blue."Is this..." Link whispered. "Are these…"He pressed the portrait to his chest, rocking gently back and forth. "I don't even know their names," he muttered. "My family…"Zelda wrapped herself around him, holding him tight - what little her affection could do - until finally he allowed himself to be held, and collapsed into her embrace."Did they suffer?" he wondered, breathing long and low. "Were they even alive at all when it happened?""Whoever they were, I am certain they would be proud of you," Zelda assured him, rubbing circles into his back."Would they?" Link said, pulling himself free. He looked down at the portrait as though it were an affront. "All I can remember of my father is how disappointed he was in me, and I can't remember anything about my mother. I'm not even an orphan, Zelda. I'm no one.""You are not no one," Zelda said firmly. Link slumped forward, dejected, gripping the portrait so tight Zelda though he might break it. She brought him close to her once more, gently taking the picture from his hands and setting it aside."It wasn't fair," she soothed. "You were never allowed to grieve.""How can I grieve a stranger?"At first, she had no answer; Link's loss was two-fold to hers - he'd lost his loved ones as well as their memory. But she recalled the cycle of being that the hooded woman had shown her - the eternal fate she and Link were bound to, and the lives they would live once this life was done."The way you would grieve a loved one," she eventually answered. "With the hope that loss isn’t the end, and that new life can follow."Zelda looked down at the face of Link's father, rendered crisp and clean despite the age of the portrait, certain now of how to help him.Their path across Hyrule would have made a fine lattice; on horse, on foot, Link and Zelda travelled as far north as the Thyphlo Ruins and as far and south as Lurelin Village itself. The residents of the little fishing village were blissfully - and somewhat thankfully - unaware of the developments to the north."King and Queen, are you?" Elder Rozel had said when Link casually mentioned taking residence in Hyrule Castle. He was a small man, with an air constant ease. "Well, good luck to you! We'll be here if you need anything."No matter how far they travelled, Zelda decreed that they return to the Castle as often as possible. Each time they did, Link was glad to find some small progress was made. After the first month of Summer, the debris had been cleared from the Castle. After the second, a great, circular stone slab had been cut and carried from a quarry in Lanayru, and now the floor of the throne room was repaired. And by the end of Summer, plans for the new school in Hateno were made, and in addition, it seemed that at last, all of the Malice that remained in Hyrule had been destroyed. Link had lost count of the number of Cleansing Rituals he and Zelda had performed. They had begun to lose their wonder too - becoming as mundane as saddling his horse or setting a fire.Once they had determined that their work with the Malice was complete, Link decided upon a final place to take the Master Sword and turned his horse north. Zelda did not question the choice, only asked why now.Why now? Link would draw the Sword, take a whetstone to its blue-tinged blade, and was for a moment unsure. The Sword had been his for over one hundred years. Its soul was his soul; its song his song. But the song was sadder now, and the courage it once brought was bittersweet. Hyrule could rebuild, become greater than it once had been. But it would not be the Hyrule that they had lost in the Calamity. The Sword was part of that Kingdom too, Link felt.Once the air of the Lost Woods cleared and the mangled trees with open-mouth trunks gave way to solid evergreens entwined with snaking vines, Korok Forest opened out before them. The flowers in the forest meadow were in full bloom, soft music emanating from the little village. Shielded from the sun, the air between the trees was cool - a welcome respite from the summer heat. Link could not help but grin when he saw the wide-eyed masks of the Koroks who watched them as they approached, and heard their hushed whispers. Swordsman. Princess. Here again.The Deku Tree seemed to smile when he saw them, the deep lines of his carved face shifting with reverent delight."Ah, well now. It is not characteristic of a tree to feel impatience," he said. Link felt the depth of the tree's voice in his chest. "But I was anxious to see you both before me."At his side, Zelda was beaming up at the ancient tree. "I am glad to have kept my promise," she laughed. "And especially glad to see that all is well here.""The Koroks have whispered of the conflict, and its end," the tree mused. His weathered face grew even more solemn, if that was possible. "Hyrule can now heal, after so long. But if I may ask, what has brought you before me?"With unsteady hands, Link began to unbuckle the Master's Sword from his chest. "We have come to return the Sword," he said, fighting through his doubt."But this Sword is a part of you, is it not?" the Deku Tree asked, unhelpfully.Link clutched the blue and gold scabbard tight in his hands, feeling as though they had turned to stone. He had been so sure, but now that the moment had come..."Ganon is gone, and Cinelgen is dead," Zelda answered for him. "The Sword was an honour, not a gift."Link took a steadying breath; the decision had been made, even if parting with the Sword left a hollow in his chest."I am the Sword's Master, but it is not my slave," he told the tree, preparing to remove the Sword from its scabbard. “It has earned rest.”"An admirable observation," the Deku Tree agreed. "Proceed then. The Koroks and I will watch over the Master Sword for when its time comes again. And we will forever be here, should you need respite.""Forever?" Link said. He looked down at the Sword and remembered Purah’s words, which seemed so easily said then, when now they felt heavy as rocks. "Nothing is forever.""Ah, perhaps not," the tree chuckled. "But wisdom and memory make mortal lives eternal. I will remain, as will your friends and lost loved ones, so long as we are not forgotten. The Sword and the Beasts will sleep for now, but perhaps not forever."It was not a question Link had dared to broach with Zelda. Will you ever wake them up - and my beast with them? When she had not protested the plan to return the Sword, he thought that meant she never would.Zelda placed a hand on the scabbard. "Perhaps, in time. When Hyrule is truly whole. I do not consider anything completely lost."Link looked back at the Sword; he thought about all the days he had carried it, all the things he remembered and all of the things he could not. The Sword had seen it all, and so perhaps it kept those parts of his soul safe. Knowing this, he felt finally he could begin to let go.With deftness and purpose, Link drew the Sword from its hilt. He offered it to Zelda to take in hand with him, and together, they held it over the pedestal, and slowly lowered it into its rest."Thank you," Link whispered, feeling already something within him fading; a chant or a song or a familiar warmth, he wasn't sure. His hands began felt cold.Zelda had yet not released the Sword. She kept her right hand wrapped tight around the diamond-patterned held, and held out her left for him. "Before we go, Link, I have something I need to show you."There was an other-worldly purpose in her voice. The golden crest on her hand was shining brightly, so bright that he could see its light reflected in her eyes. "What do you mean?" he asked slowly.She extended her hand forward, willing him to take it. "You will see."Were it anyone else, he might have hesitated. But it was Zelda before him, and so without fear, Link placed his hand in hers, and with the suddenness of blinking, he was someplace else.At first, it had no form. The light was everywhere here. Soon, he could make out shapes and colours. He let himself be momentarily overwhelmed until framed by an orange-gold backdrop he saw Zelda standing before him, her figure fading into clarity. He stood on a stone platform and taking in his surroundings, he saw a glass pedestal before them, and an endless dusk sky."Where are we?" he said, startled by the crispness of his own voice. Zelda had her hand in his and gave him a reassuring squeeze. She was holding the Master Sword."Somewhere once sacred," she explained. "Someplace made of time.""What does that mean?""Time flows through here like clouds in the sky," she gestured to the shining horizon, and the long wisps of white lofting high above. "I've been coming here since my powers awoke, though I didn’t know it at first. The Sword is the key, as is the song. Beyond that, I don’t really know. Time is such a funny thing.” She let go of his hand and took a step towards the pedestal. “And as my powers grew, finding this place became easier, and now I have been able to bring you with me.""You said… you needed to show me something?" Link said as he followed her, his memory returning. They had been in the forest, but it felt impossibly far away now.With a nod, Zelda placed her right hand on the pedestal, "Link - forget nothing of what you see, and do not be afraid. Although," she added with a giggle. "Knowing you…"In a flash, Zelda, the pedestal, and everything around Link fell away, and was replaced by... the study of Battlemaster Otra's, in Hyrule Garrison. It was unmistakable - Link recognised the sparse furniture and strong smell of leather oil instantly - but it was also impossible.Still, Otra of Old Lurelin was sat at a wide oak desk in his study beside a tall window that overlooked the training yard below. Link heard the clanging of steel and shouting voices, realising he stood in front of the huge window. It seemed so real. Was this another memory?The Battlemaster was attending to some paperwork, hurriedly scrawling out a report. Standing before him, dressed in the full regalia with silvery blonde hair pulled loosely into a low ponytail, was a Hylian Knight.Link could not stop himself. "Father!" he called out.He rushed forward, but the Knight did not turn. In fact, neither man seemed to hear. Across the room, Link caught sight of Zelda standing against the far wall, the Master Sword still in hand, and he realised. This was a vision, and before Link could stop it, it began to play."How could you do this, Otra?" His father demanded. Link could not move; in the portrait, his father seemed otherworldly, almost mythic. But here he was real, just a man, with blue eyes like his. They were almost the same height, though Link was not quite as tall as his father.The Battlemaster had stopped writing.“Micah," he began, and Link's breath caught in his throat as he heard his father's name. "There's nothing you can do. Link has already departed north for the Forest."His father was incensed. "You know what they will do, don't you? If he returns with the sword. They will make him their Champion!"Otra stood from his chair, clearly agitated, though his voice was calm. "Doesn't that make you proud? Your own son, receiving an honour only found in legend.""Aye, and be bound to that Princess for the rest of his life," his father countered "What little he may have left!""Calamity Ganon's return is a rumour. Nothing more. I've said that enough to Rhoam, let alone you!"Micah pointed an accusing finger at the Battlemaster. "You are not a fool, Otra. We have cursed ourselves by resurrecting those Beasts and those automatons. It may not be Ganon that destroys Hyrule, but if they name my son Champion, he will be first to fight whatever tries to!""Have you no faith in his ability? I trained him myself - if I am no fool, then Link cannot be one either."The old knight had nothing to say then. Micah brought a gloved hand to his face, rubbing his wrinkle-lined eyes, and sighed. He stepped forward, and leaned against the edge of Otra's desk, "I just… I wanted something different for him. Ever since we lost Rowan…"Rowan. That was her name, Link thought, remembering his mother. She was there all at once; a plain and pragmatic woman, with long blonde hair and freckled skin. She wore the elegant clothes expected of a Knight's wife, though her hands were bare of jewels, and her face hardened from years of scowling. She was a teacher too, Link recalled, in Hateno. They had lived in a cottage together on the far side of the river until Link was old enough to begin his training as a Knight. Micah and Rowan, Link mouthed the names, but they barely seemed real.Micah went on. "I thought my son could become a knight like me, marry and find happiness in a family and in service as I had. I was convinced that was his destiny. But I never saw my family as much as I wanted. Always travelling around, always training, always off to combat some new threat... And so when Rowan died... I realised. What if I'd doomed my son to a life he would not have chosen? A life lived for others and never himself?"Otra walked around the front of the desk, and sat down by the side of his friend, placing a comforting hand on his shoulder. "Link is my most dedicated student, my best fighter. If he didn't want this, he would have given up years ago.""I've been trying to tell him this for a while. But I'm not the best talker, you know me," Micah pushed off from the desk, crossing his arms over his chest. He carried a shield and longsword, Link saw and had a crossbow at his hip. A crossbow! Link gazed at it in awe, tears falling freely. It was of finer make than Link's, and he would have given anything to be able to hold it, and to know the man that wielded it.“Everything I say comes out as orders,” Micah went on. “All I know is how to be a guard captain.”"Just like your son will be," Otra grinned. "Captain of Princess Zelda's guard.""But what if he could have been more? You remember how he killed his first Hinox? Most knights equip themselves with their best weapons and armour, purchase a few elixirs and leap headfirst into the battle, often coming back with some angry bruises and maybe a broken bone," His father's stern face brightened with a toothy smile. "Well, do you know how my son decided to earn his knighthood, Otra?""Of course I do," Otra laughed.I don't! Link wanted to shout. Tell me, please!His father revelled in telling the tale. "He didn't even wear armour. He took some rusty old swords from the armoury and found a Hinox that lived in Hyrule Ridge. He camped for almost a week waiting for a storm to come, and just before the thunder began, snuck his cache of metal swords to beast's side, and just... waited. Not a minute later, boom! Lightning struck right where he'd left the swords, and killed the Hinox just like that," Micah clicked his fingers and burst into laughter. "My Link came away without a scratch!"My Link. My son. Link felt as though he could burst."He's more cunning than the average knight, I'll give him that," Otra admitted. "Perhaps you can see now why he was chosen? Whatever he faces, he will not be brash. And fret not, my friend - perhaps the Sword will spare him."Link saw a twinkle in his father's familiar sapphire eyes. "I know my son, Otra," he said decisively. "He will come back with that sword."Micah turned towards the window, looking out at the training yard below, and across time, father and son stood eye to eye. Link reached out, trying to grasp onto him somehow. To make him whole, and here, and alive."Do you really think… is he happy, Otra?" Micah asked."I am, Father," Link said aloud. "I am."Somewhere within him, Link believed that his father might have heard.Otra just shrugged, and the old knight sighed. Link joined his father in gazing down at the training yard. Below knights in training were sparring, scuttling back and forth across the mud with their wooden swords in hand."Do you understand then, Link?" Zelda said, shattering the illusion. She crossed the room towards the window. "Your father sees what I see.""That I could be more…?"Zelda nodded. Beside them, Micah continued to watch the training, while Otra had returned to his paperwork."Hyrule needs more than just Knights," Zelda explained. "It needs people - whole people - with strength, and spirit, and cunning. I believe wholeheartedly you hold all three virtues. We both do, in our own way."Link looked at his father and studied the lines on his ageing face. "I realised something. The voice I've been hearing… it wasn't his."Zelda tilted her head to the side. "Then whose?""A couple different ones, mostly my own. But not his. My father wanted something different for me. He didn’t always get it right, but he was trying to help," Link reached down and took Zelda's hand in his own, bringing it to his lips. "You found this, didn't you?"She held his hand tight. "Of course. I'd do anything if it meant you could be happy, Link. It's the only thing I've always wanted, from before to now."Link kissed her hand; once, twice, wanting to bundle her up and never let go. "Thank you for showing me this," he said warmly. An old idea was stirring in his mind once more; it seemed now he had the confidence to chase it. "I think... I think I know what to do now."Zelda allowed him one last look at his father, and his teacher, and with their hands entwined once again, she took them both home.Once he was sure of his plan, Link told it to Zelda as though proposing a trade deal. She promised to divulge it to no one; he wanted to be the first to tell their allies back at the Castle."I think it's a good plan," Zelda assured him. That was all Link needed to hear; her approval solidified his intent, and he stood taller and smiled brighter than she had seen all summer.It had been nothing short of blissful, being on the road with Link once more. Their days had been spent at ease; walking, and talking, or not talking at all, pointing out interesting sights and landmarks, rare flowers and Bokoblin camps, some still inhabited. And while most days they retired not long after sunset, exhausted from their travels, there were plenty more where they did not sleep at all, finding a different kind of comfort in one another and the privacy of their tent.They soon fell into a rhythm that bordered on domestic. Zelda could count on one hand the Summer days in which she hadn't awoken in Link's arms, or when she couldn't call his name and find him at her side in a heartbeat. His presence was constant welcome now; they ate together, travelled together, slept and even trained together. Zelda's aim soon rivalled even Link's, and he jeered that she had an unfair advantage by wielding a Rito bow, so she proved her ability by challenging him to an archery contest - using only his crossbow. When she shot as many bullseyes as he did, Link at last conceded that she had a talent, and a good eye."Not just one, but two, and the most beautiful I've ever seen," he crooned.She gave him a playful shove and chided, "You had better be talking about my eyes."They returned to Hyrule Castle at the end of Summer to find it a bustle of activity; Hudson and had knocked down the old structures of Castle Town and were marking out the plots for the new builds. Rito couriers and traders were coming and going from all directions, Hyrule Castle having become a favourite pit stop in their travels. And curious travellers were beginning to flock to their gates, having learnt that it was finally safe to explore the once harrowing Castle Grounds. A new stable had even been built outside Castle Town, the horse head effigy a fond and familiar sight on the horizon.After a welcome, warm supper and a happy reunion with Teba and his family, Zelda helped Link gather their closest allies - Teba, Larella and Inglis - around a long table in the dining hall to make the announcement. All around them, the new residents of Hyrule Castle supped -- builders, cooks, scouts and people of all kinds -- filling the hall with chatter.Link stood before his friends with his hands at his back and told them his plan in full, not one to waste words."You're going to Akkala!?" Inglis exclaimed once Link was done. He was positively buzzing at the prospect, his face full and bright. "For how long?""As long as it takes," Link said plainly. "The Citadel was the stronghold of the Hylian Knights, but it was a settlement too. There is much to rebuild there.""Such as the Order," Teba surmised.Link nodded, impressed at the warrior's savvy. "As you say. I'm the last Knight of Hyrule," he looked to Inglis, singling him out with his eyes. "But who knows for how much longer?"The Akkalan's mouth fell open, and he brought a finger to his chest. "You want me in your order…?""You're quick and strong, and I could use someone who knows the land well," Link had told Zelda that he was not sure if his friend would say yes to the proposal - becoming a Knight was no small commitment, and Link recalled Inglis' disdain for the way Cinelgen kept him under his thumb, calling him his squire.But Inglis' acceptance was immediate. He threw his arms wide and pulled Link into a strong embrace. "Of course!" he grinned. "Say the word, Link, and I'll be there with you.""But why Akkala? Why not here?" Larella interjected, the first to be sceptical. She seemed perturbed by Link's plan, shifting and fidgeting when Link mentioned the Castle repairs."Because Akkala is also where Robbie lives, and I'd like to seek him out."Larella pressed further. "The researcher? Why?"Turning and sweeping an arm in front of the desk behind him, Link gestured to the trio of items he'd put on display - the crossbow, his journal, and the Sheikah Slate. "I was a fighter all my life, and someone dear to me convinced me I could be more," Surreptitiously, his eyes met Zelda's, and he flashed her an affectionate smile. "And Robbie is an engineer as well as a scholar - so I'd like to see what I learn from him. Hudson is a decent builder, but the repairs needed here are on an entirely different scale. And even though we've lost the Sheikah technology, there's so much more we haven't discovered."Teba turned to Zelda. "And you agree with this? He could be away for months, years.""And what will I be? A pining princess in her castle?" she laughed and shook her head. "I've spent enough time like that. I have my own projects to look into anyway. We can choose to work apart-""-just as we chose to work together," Link finished. There was a certainty between them then, and it felt like fate. Not a great change in the order of things, but a continuation."You have my blessing," she told him once his explanation was done, speaking the words as a command. "Shape this kingdom as you see fit."She kissed his hair, and reached over to the Sheikah Slate on the table in front of him. She tapped the screen, and the shining symbol of the Sheikah eye appeared before him; she had somehow managed to keep it working when most of the Sheikah tech was becoming obsolete.How many times had Link seen the Slate over the past two years? His adventure to reunite with Zelda -- both of them -- had been with this Slate near constantly at his side. While there was so much ahead of him, it felt like he was returning home.When he looked up to thank Zelda, she had departed for the other side of the room, talking with Larella about something Link could not hear. Teba excused himself soon after with little more than a grunt and a dry good luck."Never thought I would see this up close again," Inglis admitted sheepishly. Link decided not to tease him. Cinelgen and Milagre were not long dead, in the scheme of things."Me either," he said instead, trying to draw the conversation away from their old friends. "You use it too much and you feel hindered without it."Inglis nodded, lips pressed thin, no doubt thinking of them anyway. Well, no better time to ask. Or, no worse."Inglis, I need to ask you something, about Cinna," Link said quietly. He quickly glanced around to check none of the other diners were in earshot. Beside him, Inglis tensed."W-what is it?""Before he died, he spoke of something you, as in you both, found at the Castle. He said it 'changed everything'."Inglis bowed his head, muttering, "Oh, no, no, not this.""What did he find, Inglis? You need to tell me. If it's dangerous, if it's here--""I didn't see it!" Inglis snapped, loud enough that people on the next table over from theirs turned, ever so briefly to look. Inglis lowered his voice. "I was afraid to follow him into those caverns. And it's been so long -- years now -- that I couldn't tell you how to get back to it. Cinna never spoke of it again but I knew...it was part of why we came back here. But Link,” he leaned in close, voice barely more than a whisper. “There is something here, beneath us. Something old, and terrible. Maybe get your people to look into it, or don't, I don't know. Don't you think some things are better left untouched?""You think Zelda will see it that way?" Link scoffed. Inglis laughed nervously, taking a drink from his glass of wildwine."I'm glad we're going to Akkala then," he chuckled, raising his glass to Link. Link grabbed his own tankard, and put the thought of what they had discussed out of his mind.Preparations for the trip to Akkala were underway immediately. Link would travel east with Inglis, and then north past Lanayru, carrying a Royal decree to re-establish the order of Hylian knights. Zelda would stay to oversee restoration efforts at the Castle, and, in time, investigate Cinelgen's warning.One week before he was set to depart, Zelda took him to Kakariko, citing urgent business with Impa. It would only be a day's worth of travel she assured him, and it would afford him a chance to see Rhoamet once more. For good luck, she added, though Link needed little convincing.The Guardian sat undisturbed in the graveyard of the Sheikah village, his ancient body gathering moss. Link mournfully placed a hand on the Guardian's husk, tracing the ornate swirls and patterns. "How are you going, buddy?" he asked quietly. "Enjoying the rest?"He sniffed, fighting down tears, breathing heavily as he wiped his eyes dry. Zelda had been back and forth on her decision for weeks. It had come to her in the days after showing Link the memory of his father, and she knew perhaps it was a bad decision. That she might regret it, or that the other people of Hyrule would disapprove. But seeing Link's sorrow - how could she deny him this kindness?"Link," she said sweetly. "There's something I never told you."He peered back at her but said nothing, and so she went to his side, and they stood together by Rhoamet's shell as a light rain began to fall."When I was with the Rito, Kass was the only one who believed my story, at first."Still, Link remained silent, but he nodded in understanding."He sang me a song," she continued - that made Link turn to face her at last. "He told me the same story he told you. The story of the Hero and the Princess."Carefully, she began to remove the glove on her right hand. "He said that love awoke my powers. And while he has the truth of it, in part, it’s not the whole picture," She looked towards Rhoamet. "You and I have a duty to protect this Kingdom and its people, and we are at our best when we truly wish to do so."Holding a hand to the Guardian's cold, ceramic shell, Zelda felt the power in her palm respond. She could feel the warmth building on her skin. "Even so, I have used these powers out of love, many times. But now that we are safe, I can feel them receding. So I have one last wish to use. After all, could I really let you go study with Robbie without your Guardian?"Link spoke at once, "Zelda, wait–" His words came out as stammers. "He could be… he could be vulnerable."She cupped a hand to his cheek to quiet him. "He won't be powered in the same way as before. His core will be silent. But if Kass is right, and my powers really do come from a place of love, then Rhoamet will be incorruptible.""You don't have to–""Shh, Link. Don't let him see you frown," she chided gently. "Don't you want him to wake seeing the joy that he brings you?"As she fed her power to him, the Guardian began to stir, his body radiating a soft blue glow. And then he was awake, his single eye unmoving as he beheld them. Slowly, he began to blink, the same repeated pattern, over and over; ● ▬ ● ●, ● ▬ ● ●
Link
"He's saying my name," Link gasped. And then he cheered. "He's saying my name! Aren't you!? Oh, you're so smart!"Link leapt onto the Guardian, wrapping his arms around its bulky head. The automaton stumbled backwards under Link's weight. "Hey buddy!" Link beamed. "Remember me?"Rhoamet blinked happily, and spun around, drawing a startled cry from Link, followed by peals of laughter. Link leapt down from the Guardian, and raced towards Zelda, sweeping her into his own spinning embrace and giving her a rapturous kiss."I love you," he said, the words so rich she felt them in her blood. "More than anything, you know that?"Zelda could do nothing but giggle and kiss him again, in a way that said, of course, and I know, and I do too. But she could not speak. The euphoria had caught her tongue. Between kisses, Link passed a glance back at Rhoamet, and Zelda sighed."Go on then," she said as rolled her eyes, but Link did not tear himself away. Instead, he offered out a hand and helped her climb onto Rhoamet's shell."We'll all go together," Link said, directing Rhoamet carry them back to the Castle. Climbing aboard, Zelda was happy to let them lead.The old Castle gardens had been transformed. Three rows of tables fifty feet long were laid out among the old bushes of saffina, violets and roses, and were packed with all manner of food from all across Hyrule; salted fish from Lanayru, char-grilled meat from Eldin, fruits of all kinds and cakes in every colour, spiced dishes from Gerudo that could be hot like fire or cool as ice, and a stew for every season from Hebra. A banner had been hoisted between an old archway with Farewell, Master Link! painted on the canvas. And all through the Castle, blue and white lanterns signified the importance of the celebration, the reason why half the Kingdom had come to the celebrate; it was not just Link's going away, it was Champion Day.Teba of Lake Totori leaned against one of the garden wall, watching the celebration from a comfortable distance. He surveyed the feasters, and the dancers, confident that he had no wish to join them. Occasionally, he would glance to where his wife and son sat; they were looking at a lantern together. Teba whispered a prayer of thanks to the Goddess each time he beheld them.As the night waned, he was joined away from the fray by Kass. The bard was carrying his accordion in arm as always and gave Teba a curt nod in greeting, before beginning to tap away at the keys. It was a tune Teba had not heard."New song?" he asked.The bard paused and nodded. "Indeed. A new song for a new age.""Given it a name?"The bard shot him a knowing look. "Of course," he answered. "The Trio. The Princess, the Knight, and their loyal Guardian.”Teba chuckled at the bard's wistful tone. "Wouldn't that be nice - immortalised in song? I haven't done much that's memorable, though.""Ah - but a song is just a memory, my friend, captured and kept," Kass smiled, holding his accordion close. "To build a legend from nothing more than single moments.""Living legends – that's definitely one way to describe those kids," Teba agreed. Among the fray, he could see them - Link and Zelda, hand in hand, dancing to some rambunctious, brassy number belted out by a band of Goron musicians. From this distance, they really did look like kids - youthful and carefree - perhaps for the first time since he'd met them. Their Guardian was sitting happily to the side, being doted on by some curious children.Kass returned to practising his new song - another waltz. The friends stood together in the fading light, surrounded by peace in a place that was finally beginning to heal. Teba listened contentedly as Kass sung his song, and ushered in a new age for Hyrule.
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
It was a rare thing, home. Crossing the bridge to the cottage he shared with his family, Micah of Hateno Village counted each moment at home as a blessing.
A trail of smoke was rising from the chimney of their little cottage house, and even before he reached the door, Micah could hear the footsteps of a precocious young child pounding on the floor, and could smell the rich aroma of vegetable stew on the stove.
He heard a woman's voice call out - 'Look, little one' - and the footsteps stopped; the door burst open, and from within came running a child of six, with ash blonde hair and bright blue eyes.
"Father!" the boy shouted, and Micah threw open his arms to catch his son, hauling him into the air, his ears soon filled with the sound of delighted squeals.
"Look!" his son said, pulling up a sleeve and flexing his skinny little arm. "Just like you! We've been playing swords at school."
Micah could not help but throw his head back and laugh. "Wonderful!" he beamed. "You'll have big muscles in no time!"
The boy grinned wide, revealing a missing front tooth, and wrapped his arms around Micah's neck for another hug. This was what made it worth it; the miserable days of travel in the rain and snow, the hours of training, the political intrigue at the Castle and the loneliness of being so far from home so often. This child and this home were the antidotes to the laboured life Micah led.
"Let your father go, Link!" Micah's wife came next, wiping her hands on her apron as she hurried out into the yard. "You'll strangle him."
She was unchanged in the months they had been apart; short blonde hair neatly braided from her face, freckled skin gathering wrinkles. No matter how many times he beheld her, Micah still felt a rush of calm upon seeing her face, one that brought a sense of belonging and ease that nothing could.
"It's fine, Rowan, he's not that strong yet," Micah said, leaning forward to kiss her on the cheek when she approached.
"But he is stubborn," Rowan replied, giving Link a gentle pinch on the shoulder. The boy winced and whined, which only made Rowan laugh. She pointed to the house, "Run along now. Go show your father your wooden sword."
Link did as he was told, leaping to the ground and running into the house, the dirt powdering behind his boots as he went. When Micah looked back to Rowan, her face had hardened.
"How long this time?" she asked, before turning to head inside the house.
"I can only stay a few days," he said, and she frowned, turning to walk back into the house. Micah chased after her. "Hey - I'm sorry, Rowan, hey—!" She stopped, folding her arms indignantly.
"Have you thought any more about coming to the Castle?" Micah ventured.
"And put more ideas in Link's head about being a fearless warrior?" his wife scoffed. It was a familiar argument, one it seemed they would step through once more. "Micah, he's a child—"
"He's the son of a Knight," Micah argued. “It’s expected that he—“
"He’s my son too. Is it expected that he become a teacher like me?” Rowan said. She straightened her apron, fussing - an old habit when she was annoyed. "I understand, I do. We live this life, but it isn't the only life."
There was truth to her words, but Micah did not like to consider them. "I know that," he said sternly.
"Then come home! Try to see what I see—“
"I swore an oath! Link won’t have a home if something happens to Hyrule—"
There was a sniffle at the door. Link had returned, clutching the little wooden sword in hand. His blue eyes were huge against his soft face, glassy with tears - two deep pools of open waters, so clear that Micah could almost see his reflection in them.
"You were fighting about me," he whimpered.
Both parents relented at once. Micah knelt, and outstretched his arms, while Rowan sighed, her stony expression giving way to concern.
"Come here, little one," she urged their son. "We weren't fighting, really."
Link trotted over to his father and allowed himself to be picked up once again. Calling a truce between himself and his wife, Micah wrapped an arm around Link and Rowan both.
"We're here together, isn't that wonderful?" he told them and was glad to see a weak smile on Rowan's face. Micah nodded to Link's sword, filled with pride at the sight of it. "And look at that! You hold it like a natural - you'll be a great swordsman someday!"
Aurelia closed her eyes and breathed in the ocean air. There was something sad about Akkala. So plain and desolate and isolated, but beautiful too. It was a world away from the desert, but not too dissimilar. It would be what her people needed, for now.Her people. In earnest. Some called her Master. Some called her Chief. She told them Aurelia would do.Some traditions kept. Some traditions lost. Her Yiga would not cast their sickles aside, but now they used them to cut grass to weave into baskets, and harvest crops that did not grow in the desert. They kept their tattoos, though their masks were no longer worn, the need to hide no longer there.And gradually the apprehension faded, both towards others and themselves. In the Autumn, they travelled across the land in search of the strays of their kind — footsoldiers and blademasters — and to their surprise some even joined them. One of them, a Blademaster named Rin, was particularly skilled in Yiga magics, and was pleased to find so many new students among Aurelia’s Yiga, including Aurelia herself. He seemed most glad however to sleep in the same bed each night, the promise of a new life in a permanent home, one shared with others rather than alone on the cold roads, being enough for him.For other Yiga strays, not so much. Plenty had refused to join, some rejecting the notion of peace violently, and Aurelia had had to rely on her new bladed recruits to get them out of more than a few scrapes. And so like their ancestors had ten millennia ago, the Yiga were once again split; those who went with Aurelia in search of peace, and those who weren’t yet ready.It was a problem for Spring. Winter was soon, so Aurelia had managed to secure her people accommodation at Akkala Citadel, so long as they kept to themselves. Soon the Yiga would be ready to strike out on their own; to found a new village somewhere, perhaps join their Sheikah brothers and sisters in salvaging what was left of their shared history. In this purpose Aurelia hoped she would find peace, at last.But in the meantime, they made do at the Citadel. A place full of surprises. Every week a new level was discovered, or a new hall. Her sister Hana saw the size of one of the kitchens deep within the Citadel and half wept with happiness. She spent all her days baking and cooking and had half the young men there in love with her for that alone. Though none tried anything; they were too afraid of Aurelia, which she did not mind.Another surprise had come at the end of Autumn; namely, the Champion Link, travelling without his Princess. He had come to this part of the world to study under a Sheikah researcher, and to train the first Knights of the new Hyrulean order. The Akkalan Inglis accompanied him, and soon came a motley of impressionable Hylians after them. Aurelia recognised one of them - the tattooed girl whose life she had saved in Kakariko Village, and who had saved her own in turn. Paya was her name, and she had come to visit one of her people, a Sheikah boy raised in Akkala named Granté, who had settled in a little village not far from the Citadel. Grandmother says it's my duty to know all of our people, Paya told Aurelia over dinner in the great hall of Akkala Citadel, where they shared a pan of Hana’s baked tomato and eggs. I will tell her you are one of them. And so in breaking bread and shaking hands, Sheikah and Yiga formed the first alliance in recorded memory — at least, two of them did, sealing it with the promise to write.Soon the grounds of Akkala Citadel swelled with half a dozen recruits for the new Knight order. Link had offered for Aurelia to join, stating that it’d be good to have some of the Yiga fighting tradition in his new Knights’ skillset, but she declined. However reluctantly Aurelia had accepted the title of Master, she felt bound to her people now. Still, she was glad to have training partners again who had some level of skill.Link was a beast in his own right; even without that fancy sword of his. It was his speed that surprised Aurelia the most. You’re every bit the legend our footsoldiers complained about, she told him, to which he said nothing, only laughed high and wild into the Akkalan dusk. Inglis, on the other hand, was a brute to spar with, relying on his strength alone. Cinelgen's influence. Aurelia soon beat the habit out of him after the twentieth time or so that she tripped him. Once he lay on the grass after falling and smiled up at her something radiant, and when she’d helped him stand he’d lingered holding her hand a little longer than needed. She would never admit it, but Aurelia was glad to see the Akkalan again. Inglis was the only one who could remember, or understand, the things that she remembered - the harshness of life in the desert, the day of the Karusa massacre, the day she had lost her eye. A few small threads of shared existence and pain; and those were so rare in a place so sparse.She stood on Eastern Battlements of Akkala Citadel, Inglis with her now as he surveyed the distant hills of Deep Akkala with a pair of binoculars. They usually met first thing in the morning now, to talk or stand in silence, both uncomfortable with the painful memories that quiet early hours brought."I'm going to the eastern beaches tomorrow," he said to her, lowering his binoculars. "I want to see where the world ends."Aurelia rolled her eyes. “Build a boat then, Inglis.”He ignored her taunt. “Why don’t you come with me?” He asked, with a sincerity that surprised her.“Why the hell would I do that?”She hadn’t meant it to come out so sharp. She never really did with Inglis, but for as long as she’d known him she couldn’t help it.Inglis sighed, taking her hand. She tried to snatch it back but he held firm, and his skin was surprisingly soft for someone born to as rough a land and life as him. "Aury,” he said. “Can’t we just be friends?”"Friends…?" She repeated.“We’ve both… gone through a lot,” he said, entwining their hands. “Aren’t you as lonely as I am?”Aurelia had no answer for him, and feared the answer would be not what he wanted to hear. She had per people, her allies, but who did he have, anymore? Strange tears came from her then, from mourning that had been suspended in time. She felt Inglis' guilt in the strength of his embrace as he drew her in close and in the way he wrapped steadying arms around her as if he would not let go."Did you... ever talk to anyone about what happened to you? Your sister, and your…?" Inglis pulled away and gestured to her eyepatch. Aurelia shook her head."Me neither," Inglis muttered. "About any of it. The years of it. Sometimes I miss him, you know, but then I remember what he was like and...I don't know how to feel."Aurelia rested her head against his shoulder, letting the tears flow. She could smell the cotton of his shirt as she pressed her face into the fabric. "I'm trying to be strong, for my people…"Warmth enveloped her as Inglis held her close, and Aurelia hugged him tightly. She poured herself into the embrace, finding reprieve after standing for so long on her own and trying to savour what she knew was a doomed arrangement. You belonged to the man who laid waste to my life, she thought, how could we ever be friends? But for that moment she let it go; in the long and cold Winter, they would both need comfort, and could leave the going about of their lives to the thaw.Inglis stooped his head and kissed her brow above her empty right eye. "Tomorrow, we'll go down to the beach," he said. "Talk and… collect shells, or whatever it is people do.""Link won't mind if you run off?" Aurelia asked.Inglis smiled and tongued a tooth, thinking for a moment. "Nah," he said. "Or maybe, I just won't tell him."
Dear King Sidon,
It is with regret that I write to you again to inform you that I must again reject your proposal.
As much as I wish to return home, I made a promise to Zelda, and my efforts are best spent here, at Hyrule Castle. There is so much work to be done, and so much resting on her success. The Domain will always thrive, but Zelda needs my help now more than ever. Since I made my decision, I have not for a moment felt regret. By the Princess’ side is where I belong, for now.
As you know, the Hylians do not live as long as us. Soon, the Princess and her Knight will be settled, and well into their lives. They will soon have no need for me. Then I will return, and sadly not before.
I will not ask you to wait. You are the future King, and you must secure that future for your people. But know that I will always care for you, and love you dearly, for the kindness you have shown me. If there is any aid you require, I will do my best to provide it via correspondence.
I enjoyed visiting you during the Autumn. Perhaps, come Spring, you will visit me? Or perhaps I can convince Zelda to make a diplomatic mission to Zora's Domain. Though Winter is here, the Princess has said she does not mind travelling through the snow.
Regardless, I believe in you, Sidon, as I know you believe in so many others. If you ever need any advice or assistance, you know how to reach me.
Yours faithfully,
Larella,
Chief Advisor to Princess Zelda Bosphoramus of Hyrule
The bubbles swirled in her glass as Buliara gave her hydromelon tea another stir. Leaning against a sun-warmed wall, she took a short sip, and then another, feeling the cool spread through her mouth. Even in the middle of winter, the heat of Gerudo Desert did not relent.Not that Buliara minded; the warm days were welcome. They kept Gerudo Town thriving. She placed her tea down on the table next to her, beside a second, still full glass."Lady Riju," Buliara called across the courtyard before her. "Come, the ice in your drink is melting."The little Chief raised her head; she had been playing with Patricia in the sand seal's pen, giggling and rolling through the sand."In a minute!" she called back, tossing a rope toy across the pen, clapping with delight as her sand seal raced after it.Buliara's smile came unbidden; here, the matters of Gerudo Town could be left behind. Here Riju's only duty was to her sand seal and her own happiness.Even so, duty remained. There was a tap on Buliara's shoulder. She turned to see a messenger, carrying a folded note.After a short bow, the messenger quietly said, "Lady Buliara, is the Chief available? There's been a development at the Bridge, it's almost complete, and the builders thought the Chief should come see-""It can wait."A moment of silence passed as the messenger processed Buliara's words. She regained herself, holding up the note. "With all due respect, my Lady, it-"With a heavy sigh, Buliara pushed off the wall, curtly snatching the note from the messenger's hands. Across the pen, Riju had not noticed the visitor, too enamoured with adjusting one of Patricia's brightly coloured ribbons."What do you see there, before you?" Buliara asked the messenger, pointing to the little Chief.With wide, uncertain eyes that feared to utter a misstep, the messenger replied, "L-lady Riju?""Not who, what?" Buliara pressed. "Don't say 'our Chief'. What is she?"At last, the messenger understood the meaning of the question. "A… a child?" she ventured."A child," Buliara affirmed. "Enjoying one of the few carefree moments she has in her day," She waved the messenger away and turned her attention back to Riju. "The Bridge can wait.""Okay, Father, you can look now."Teba opened his eyes, met with the vision of Tulin, holding out a small package, and Saki, her wingtips on their son's shoulder. For a moment, Teba did not see the package. He was still surprised to see the way his son had grown; the boy was a fledgeling no more, now nearly a foot taller than he was since they had moved to Hyrule Castle three seasons prior, in the Summer. Tulin was on the verge of earning his wings, and of all the progress being made in Hyrule, Teba was the proudest that.Teba took the package and unwrapped the fabric to find a pair of spectacles. They were wide-set, and with long arms so that they could be tucked firmly into his crown feathers."You're kidding me," Teba laughed incredulously, picking up the glasses and peering through the lens. "Where did you find these?""A shop in Hateno," Saki answered.The answer startled him. "During our visit?"Saki laughed, "Yes, while you and Link were off taking care of those bokoblins down by the beach. Tulin and I did a little shopping. The man said he'd never made a pair for a Rito before."Teba did not know what to say. Surely the spectacles would look ridiculous, though he couldn't help but feel curious. When he hesitated, Saki was there to help him; she picked up the spectacles and gingerly placed them upon his beak."Hylia be damned," he gasped. The world before him then was stunning. It was a revelation; everything was crisper, from the ends of his wingtips to the tallest towers of Hyrule Castle behind him. He looked back to his family, marvelling at how clear and vibrant they appeared before him."Well?" he asked."You look handsome," Saki crooned, adjusting the glasses slightly, so they sat straighter. "There. Very smart.""Mother's right. It suits you, Dad," Tulin agreed.Saki offered to seek out a mirror for him, but Teba told not to worry. If she and Tulin approved, then that was all he needed.Yunobo left Goron City with little more than a pack, a bag of rupees, and a crude map of Hyrule. Where would he go? He wasn't sure. What would he do? It didn't matter. Well, he would do one thing; he would see. All that there was to see!He hadn't even told Bludo. The Boss wouldn't mind, probably. There were plenty more Gorons. If he asked, Yunobo could just claim it was official royal duty. I was a Champion, after all!It was at the stables of Eldin, not even a day into his journey, that Yunobo met the bard. He was the most colourful man Yunobo had ever seen; a Rito in green and red and blue and brown, carrying an accordion and singing a tune out the front of the Stables. When Yunobo stopped to listen, he realised that the bard was recounting the return of the Princess of Hyrule, and the adventures of her appointed Knight.
A Princess of Destiny. A Knight of Fate.The deeds they performed, nothing short of great.
Yunobo fetched a rupee from his pack and held it out to the bard."Many thanks, friend," the Rito smiled as he continued to play. "Are you headed into Hyrule? You should go see the Castle. I have heard many great stories of its restoration.""I haven't really thought about it!" Yunobo admitted, adjusting his heavy pack. "Is that what you do? Collect stories?""Me? Ah, I'm more likely to tell them!" the Rito said, holding up his accordion.Yunobo gasped in awe. "Telling stories…" he murmured, and then he frowned. "That must be hard.""It isn't, my friend. All it takes is a belief in your tale and a… light touch with the truth," the bard winked, and hooked his accordion over his back. "Say, if you care to share the coin for some stew, I can tell you more about my trade."Grinning from ear to ear, Yunobo agreed, sealing the trade with a firm handshake. This was that feeling he knew existed; he'd heard it called fate. In a flash, he saw an imagined life in front of him. There were no mines, there was no smog. Only the open air of Spring, and stories, and glowing faces listening as he spread the word of what he saw on the road. He fetched another rupee from his bag and gleefully handed it to the bard.Zelda reread the Inglis' letter for what must have been the tenth time.
You remain his inspiration, Your Majesty. There are days when Link speaks of nothing and no one else.
It was what followed that she could not fathom, no matter how many times she read the words.
Robbie got so sick of Link's endless prattling about you that he granted us leave to visit the Castle. Link was too busy packing to write, so I figured I had better.
The letter had arrived on a warm Summer’s morning, though there was a breeze in the air that told of the coming Autumn. Another year passed, two now since she had returned to Hyrule. How quickly time seemed to flow, like river water between her fingers.The letter had been hand-delivered to Zelda by a jovial Rito courier named Penn, who had appeared as a shock of white as he soared in across the clear sky from the south. Zelda had been quietly hopeful that the letter would be from Link, walking with an unladylike urgency to meet the courier in the lively entranceway to Hyrule Castle."An honour to make your acquaintance, Princess," Penn had said when she breathlessly met him at the Castle gates. The courier wouldn't hand her the parcel until he had bowed, and after he'd risen to his feet, he clicked his long beak and put his wings to his waist, saying, "Never thought I'd live to see it. A Princess in Hyrule! I'll tell my fledgelings I was blessed to meet you, but they won't believe me!"Zelda had reached into her purse and pressed a silver rupee into the Rito's grip, smiling slightly, as if sharing a secret."Some proof then. First round from the mint in Hateno. A new coin for a new era."The Rito had flown off grinning like a smitten youth, heart full and soul proud.Zelda read the letter he had delivered one last time, taking extra time to read Inglis' concluding line.
The apothecary said his leg is all healed now, so we should make good time. Best regards to all our friends at the Castle.
She pressed the letter to her chest, recalling the harrowing news; a rogue Moblin, one of the last left from the Calamity, had somehow crossed into Akkala Citadel in the middle of the night. And Link, with no armour and nothing but a dagger for defence, had raced from his sleeping cell to confront the creature. It had been slain, but not before knocking Link to the ground, and breaking his leg. Another scar in the library they shared, one that told yet another tale of how he seemed to defy death at every turn.Folding the letter carefully, Zelda returned it to a safe, hidden place within her desk. She donned her coat and walking boots, and prepared for her late afternoon stroll around Old Castle Town, taking a moment to check her braids and adjust the golden brooch she'd had made in Zora's Domain during her last visit. It was the crest of Hyrule in miniature, a wide-winged bird beholding the Three - a trio of triangles like the mark on her hand.A week had passed since the letter's arrival, and yet there was still no sign of Link. But Zelda knew that a heavy heart was best saved for the truth and depth of grief, not for the lovesick pining and the sulking loneliness that she now felt. He has his duties, and I have mine.It didn't make her miss him any less. Since he had departed for Akkala, she had managed to meet him a handful of times in their Hateno House, at least once per season. But she’d always wished for more time, and secretly longed for the day he’d come home.As she walked through the town, Zelda marvelled at the progress that had been made. A year had passed since her ascension, and that terrible day when she had shut down the Divine Beasts. Each beast sat in its respective positions, silent guardians now little more than stone. One day, Zelda knew. When we are ready, I will wake you. And if we never do, your rest is well earned.Looking down at her hands, Zelda paused for a moment to find where the golden mark had left a faint scar on the back of her hand, like a birthmark. She hadn’t used her powers in a long time, the need for them now long past. Even her travels to the Other Place had ceased. Going there had become as simple as opening the door and stepping through, and Zelda had been there one last time a few months prior.She had gone to ask the hooded woman if the mysterious realm could be used with her powers to see the future, but knew as soon as she asked that the question was a foolish one.“Do you really want to know?” The hooded woman said. Zelda held up her hand, gazing upon the shining triangles there. How that strange place had shone once she let the light of her powers flow.Zelda had clenched her fist. “This place is a sacred realm. I will not tar it by cheating time.”At this, the hooded woman bowed, a sagely look of approval on her face. Zelda had asked again who the woman really was, but all she did was smile, and say, "Go, and bring peace to Hyrule."On the south side of Castle Town, Chief Advisor Larella met Zelda on her way from the Castle with plans and papers spilling from her arms, gleefully announcing that the repairs were now exactly halfway done and that they would be ready to accept more residents soon."And are you quite sure you don't need an escort, Zelda?" Larella added.Zelda laughed, and said with a small bow of her head, "Not anymore, but thank you."Zelda crossed through Old Castle Town, which itself was beginning to awaken once again. Of their own volition travellers and researchers had begun to gather there. The air smelled of freshly baked bread and warm vegetable stew. Chatter filled the air, a dozen conversations that Zelda could only half hear wafting past. A little Hylian girl burst out from behind her, chased through the street by a grinning young boy, their red-faced and exhausted mother hot-footing after them. Zelda passed a pair of construction workers enjoying a break from their work on the Castle, their raucous laughter carried far by the wind. Smoke was rising from campfires set to drive away the lingering cold. Someday this will again be a town, Zelda thought. A town with people, a town with life.Some of those she passed bowed their heads and said Good morning, Princess! And for the first time in her life, Zelda felt she could own the title. She was their Princess only because they let her be, and let her dedicate her life to them. It was something she would never forget, and swore never to take for granted.At the gates of the town, near the old but still standing walls of Castle Town, Zelda found Teba and Tulin making their way towards the Castle from the south. They both bowed, but Zelda laughed, and bid them rise."You have your wings, Tulin!" she said when she saw the feathered pauldrons Tulin wore on his shoulders."I made them myself," Tulin said proudly, running his wingtips over the feathers.To celebrate the occasion, Zelda reached into her purse, pulling out another small silver rupee."There you are," she said. "Buy something your father wouldn't want you to," and before Teba could protest, Zelda hurried away from the gates to the sounds of Tulin's laughter.New coins. New age. New Princess. In the Spring, they had thrown a ball in the dining hall of Hyrule Castle, to celebrate the end of Winter, and it was there that Zelda had donned her royal finery for the first time in one hundred and one years. People from all over the Kingdom had come, and she knew she had to play the role of Princess then. But it was not until Link sought her at the feast afterwards, and not until he had addressed her as 'my Lady’ did Zelda feel like a regent. She had dismissed him, no need for formality – but in rich defiance Link had taken her hand in his, and kissed the golden rings on her fingers, whispering the words again;"But you are mine, aren’t you?”His. Both to rule and be ruled. It had given her a thrill, a rolling rap against her chest as if her heart were the drum and his voice the batons. More thrill than a single one of her duties so far. I am his Princess, and he is my Knight. But it was simpler than that now. More elegant. Something that could withstand time, and distance, and the suddenness of their changing Kingdom; you and I, we belong together.But they were not together, not right now. Hyrule did not end at the walls of Old Castle Town and there was work to be done all over. There were the villages, the travellers, the outposts, the ruins. All of it could be rebuilt. All of it could be what it was, more than what it was.New Kingdom. New places. New purpose. Word of Link's new endeavour as the founder of the new Hylian Order of Knights was always positive. Though Hylian was not the right term. Link had decided that his order would include everyone - Hylian, Rito, Goron, Geruo and Zora. Anyone who wanted to help protect the Kingdom would not be turned away. At last report, there were five knights-in-training at the Citadel, with more on their way from all corners of the land.Apparently, a small group of Zora were making their way to Akkala to train as well. Unprecedented! Hylian Knights who were not Hylian? Preposterous, as Zelda's father would say. But many things were preposterous; many things were unprecedented. Ganon's return, the possession of the Divine Beasts, an age of burning fields. And the return of the Hylian Princess to her Castle, now sole ruler of her Kingdom, the first after a long, long line of Kings with big ambitions and little sense? Unprecedented.And a monarch, travelling without an escort? Perhaps that was unprecedented too, and maybe reckless. Zelda walked alone to the Sacred Grounds all the same. When her longing for Link became too much, this is where she found herself; the grounds where Link had first been formally inducted into her service. When she needed to think, to solve a problem, or just to feel some clarity and peace, she would do what Link would do; she would start again, coming to where their story together had begun. Zelda closed her eyes, knelt at the centre of the grounds and bowed her head in silent prayer to the Goddesses. There was nothing to ask of them. Hyrule's fate could never be altered, but its fortunes could be savoured."Thought you'd be sick of prayer by now."His voice was both otherworldly and all too familiar. Zelda leapt to her feet, spinning on her heel, cautious not to get her hopes up. But there he was. Dressed in plain traveller's clothes, leading his horse on foot, with a longsword strapped to his back and his Sheikah Slate at his belt; her appointed knight. Well, appointed no longer - he was hers of his own volition, she knew - but a knight all the same. And of course, ever at his side, the ancient automaton; his Guardian, Rhoamet, who Zelda was pleased to see now had six legs again. Robbie's doing, she noted."I think I'm just immune to the effects of prayer, good and bad," Zelda said, and Link flashed her a wry smile. "And what about you, what brings you here?"He shrugged. "Legend speaks of a princess, carrying the blood of the Goddess. Decided I might come see her for myself.""You'll find no goddesses here.”Link's eyes never left hers. "I think I might."To keep from blushing, she changed the subject. "How are your students?""Keen, if a little clumsy,” Link said, and Zelda marvelled at the way he gushed about them. “Inglis is making progress. Nell is a beast with a spear but, Grante’s thinking it might not be for him. And I still can’t get Aurelia to join, now that she’s found a Blademaster to teach her the Yiga magics."Zelda waved to Rhoamet. "And this one?"Link reached up and gave Rhoamet an affectionate pat on his shell. "Chugging along, aren't you buddy? We've been using him to educate people about the Calamity. So few knew that his kind were once good," Link looked to the Castle walls. "What about you? How's it all going?""Flawlessly, actually," Zelda teased. "In your absence.""Oh really? I'll go, then," He looked up at Rhoamet and raised a thumb over his shoulder. The automaton whirred, large head turning back towards the path away from the Sacred Grounds, and Zelda felt herself surging forward, shaking legs carrying her to his side."Link," she called, and then she sighed, worn down by how much she needed him. "Wait. I missed you."Link brought Rhoamet to a halt with a tap on his shell, and with gentle blue eyes he appraised her with a mixture of amusement and adoration."I missed you too," he smiled, reaching up to brush a wisp of hair from her face.Zelda could hold herself back no longer. She threw her arms around him, taking in his warmth, and the way he smelled of salt, and the wind, and the open air. He was wheezing against her tight grip, and laughing too, and soon they were both laughing together. Link pulled away, a hand finding and cupping her cheek."I missed that too," he chuckled.The words were hardly more than a whisper. Link had her bewitched, so much so that Zelda would make demands she knew would go unfulfilled. "Then stay."He drew her in tighter, rubbing reassuring circles on her back. "As soon as I can, I'll be back. Once my students are ready, and my work there is done.""And what of the work here?" Zelda said, pulling away. "You know there are things we still must do, things that need both of us."Link regarded her in that same awful way, that knowing look in his eyes from under which she couldn't escape. The truth didn't need to be said. He already knew."You found it, didn't you?"Zelda nodded, barely able to believe it. "What Inglis recounted to us was right. There is a cavern -- or, caverns, a network of them, directly beneath the Castle. No one knows exactly what’s down there. Our research team only just found the entrance.”“How?”She took a deep breath. She could not look him in the eye. “Because I told them where it was.”He lurched backwards, snapping away from her embrace. “You knew?”“It was a family secret. My father said it was forbidden to ever go there, and I will heed that. But if the time comes, if the need arises…”“What about the Sheikah? Robbie, Purah...Impa?""They didn't know. And they don't want to risk going down there. It has to be us."As Link took in what she had said, Zelda looked down at the carved slab at their feet, eyes tracing the fading lines, and the symbols of which she barely understood. How could there be even more hidden from them, even more of their history kept just out of reach? Looking back to Link she saw a familiar presence to him -- certainty, and drive, and even among his concern: courage."Another adventure then?" he said with a sad smile."What would we do without them?""Will we cut our hair, like last time?""Don't be silly."Link scratched the back of his neck, resting his other hand on Rhoamet, looking between the Guardian and Zelda. Weighing up his options -- as if there was a choice. As if he would ever dream of missing out on some new legend for them to find."The first moment I can, I'll be at your side," Link said finally. "We'll go there, together."It was what she wanted to hear, and yet... "If we do, we're putting our people at risk," Zelda said. "If it's dangerous--""Then we wouldn’t be alone. We have the new Champions--""But not the Beasts."Link opened his mouth wordlessly, finding nothing but a sigh, and Zelda caught herself. She didn't want to bicker now - this argument had been played out on repeat in their letters."It’s okay, Link. That is a puzzle to solve later. You're here now. We're both here," she wrapped a hand around his and began to lead him towards the Castle. "Let's make the most of that."Link held firm, pulling her back in. His arms were around her again, and he caught her lips in a daring kiss that became a frenzy, needing and hungry, as they traded their relief and excitement between themselves, the whole thing soon devolving into another round of giggles. Hands still intertwined, Link was the first to speak."I'm not afraid, you know. Of what comes next."Zelda blinked at him, and so he clarified, "Ever since you told me about all the lives we've lived. I'm…I’m okay with it all. Another year apart, another threat, it doesn’t matter. We'll find each other again. Might not be the same me or the same you but, I know we will."Zelda recalled what she had seen; the eternal cycle of peace and war, of light and dark. It was a strange comfort, knowing that death was not the end but the start of a cycle anew."I understand," she said. "But still, I'd rather you not die in a place as dreary Akkala.""Oh no," Link insisted. "I'm tired of the rain in that place, and Inglis isn't nearly as nice to look at as you are.""Link!" she laughed, reaching up to knuckle his shoulder. She was about to scold him some more, when, out the corner of her eye, she saw it; a dozen blue and white lights, appearing one by one around the Hyrule Castle grounds. They were the commemorative lanterns, lit to honour the fallen of the Calamity, and celebrate the heroes who ended it."Champion's day," Link smiled. "It's tomorrow isn't it?"Zelda could not take her eyes off the lights. "Indeed it is," she murmured. "You were just on time as usual.""Could have been worse - could have been a hundred years late."New days. New light. Old habits. Zelda rolled her eyes, but could not hold back her smile. She would wait a hundred years if she had to, for him. Five hundred. She would do it all over again, live all the pain and the loss and the hardship if it meant a life with him. She knew without reservation that he would do the same.Zelda took his hand once more. "Come on then, wisecracker, let's go. There's a feast starting soon, and I need to give the blessing.""Lead the way, Zel," Link said, gesturing for Rhoamet to follow. "I go where you go."In the far west, the Sun was almost set - and the blue and white lanterns all across Hyrule Castle shone like stars. They twinkled and flickered. No single light was particularly strong, but together they made a symphony - of memories of the past, and hope for the future.Hand in hand, with their Guardian faithfully at their backs, Link and Zelda left the Sacred Grounds and returned to the Castle that was once again their home.
Artwork by the wonderful rabidpotato
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Updated note (May 2023)
Hello there, it's 2023 as I'm writing this, six years after finishing From the Ground Up.Over the past few months, I actually re-edited the entire work start to finish. The plot is the same, but some elements have changed or been re-written. You can read notes about the edit here, which includes a changelog of every notable edit.I won't be changing the original author's note below; it's a nice time-capsule of the original intent behind this work. What I will do is comment on a handful of things in an addendum at the end. Anything in the original marked See Addenda has been commented on.Thank you again for reading FTGU. I hope you're enjoying playing TOTK? I know I am (I'm terrified of gleeoks, send help)
Original Author's Note (2017)
I’ve been promising a final author’s note for a while, and after literally two months of putting it off, here it finally is. My wrap up post is a little more emotional about the journey FTGU took me on as a writer, whereas this post will focus purely on what I was trying to achieve, and the broad themes of the work. Who, What, Where, WhyI think somewhere buried in all my asks is the full story of what inspired me to start work on FTGU in the first place, but I’ll summarise it by saying that I just hadn’t found the kind of BOTW fic that I wanted to read, and so I wrote it for myself. I never really expected anyone to read it, and am always, always floored and honoured that so many people did, let alone enjoyed it. My initial goal with From the Ground Up was to write a semi-plausible Breath of the Wild sequel that would feature a thematically resonant sequence of events after the end of the game. I was inspired in part by the open ending and what I thought was the strangely profound emotional depth of the game itself. I don’t think any other TLOZ game has dug so firmly into the identity of its protagonists (except perhaps Skyward Sword?) or dedicated so much time into building a coherent, lived-in world. Despite how much I love the ‘community’ feel of some older TLOZ games like Ocarina of Time and The Wind Waker, I think the technical limitations of those games held them back from feeling like fully fleshed out settings. Another major driver to create something ‘realistic’ was the uniqueness of the story of Breath of the Wild itself. For me, Legend of Zelda games are about the victory of will over evil and the telling of grand legends. But in Breath of the Wild, we are made keenly aware that this story is not one of those legends. Hyrule has already lost. All of our allies are straight up dead. We see Link die. We see Zelda fail, repeatedly, and only triumph when she has lost absolutely everything. The characters in BOTW are aware of the legends that preceded them – as are we the players – but they are just normal people (for the most part), and like normal people, they don’t always win, and we cannot help but think, ‘This is not how the legend goes’. That there is the core of FTGU.The creative process for From the Ground Up can be summarised with two key methods: 1) ‘Okay, everything needs to be planned out and all the themes need to line up perfectly, here look at this spreadsheet I made’ and 2) ‘eyyy lets put this fight scene in because itd be dope af’. I had a LOT of help, from both beta readers and general feedback from readers (shout out to the person who pointed out that Saki would recognise Zelda, leading to the creation of Zelda’s disguise and fake name concept literally one day before publishing the chapter in which it first occurs), and I will never ever again commit to writing one 10,000 word chapter every five days. Jesus, no wonder Stephen King did so much coke. Themes ‘n StuffFrom the Ground Up has a few key themes that came out of its conception. They are;
Assigned roles and breaking from them
History versus Legend
War is personal
I set out with the loose goal of addressing the first one, and the other two just kind of fell out of the story.
Assigned Roles (And How to break from them)
“Do not tell me you toiled away for one hundred years against that Beast just to disappear from the world? You must find a way, and this time your own way, to fulfil your destiny.” (Impa, Ch 5)So as I’ve kind of already explained, one thing that struck me about BOTW was the deconstruction of both Link and Zelda’s roles. Zelda hates Link just for fulfilling his destiny, a far cry from previous iterations, and Zelda herself - normally the super self-actuated wise and powerful Princess - is riddled with anxiety and self-doubt. As I said above, this is not the legend we expect. I wanted to go further and explore how both Link and Zelda would adapt once their big, predestined purposes had been accomplished. Who do they become when they finally have the freedom to be anything?In FTGU, Link and Zelda clearly move in opposite directions. Zelda must learn to come into her role as a Princess and a leader, while Link must find a new role in a Hyrule that doesn’t really need a hero anymore. The role swap between Chapters 12 to 18 was a neat way to blow this idea wide open. Zelda obviously cannot immediately become a seasoned fighter and neither can Link immediately become a trained diplomat. They both struggle in unique ways – Zelda must learn to become an effective fighter within the limits of her own strength and Link must learn to read people before he can hope to manipulate them – and what I also enjoyed was working into those struggles the ways in which Link and Zelda had learnt from each other. By the end of FTGU, they have in a sense accepted their roles of Knight and Princess, but both are much more free to exert control over their lives within those roles -- See addenda. I devoted a bit more time of this theme to Link, because his ‘role’ is so much more enigmatic after BOTW. His frustration at needing to fight people rather than monsters evolves into a general confusion as to why he even became a Knight in the first place. Link clings to his assigned role because it’s the only real baseline he has, so I wanted to subvert that entirely by having his own father, Micah, recognise that Link doesn’t need to be limited by it. Link ‘meeting’ his father is probably my favourite scene in the entire work, not only because it’s that scene where Link realises his full potential, but because he also makes peace with his former life and accepts that he can now move on. And in the end, we see this new potential realised as Link takes an apprenticeship with Robbie, and begins to reform the Knight Order into a (very wholesome) Hyrulean Knight Academy. Beyond just Link and Zelda, there are clear examples of this theme in almost all of the characters. The new Champions face challenges in their roles; Sidon in his apprehension to becoming King (resulting in him losing the title altogether), Teba in accepting that he can no longer fulfil his role as warrior and that his son may have a different role in society than he did in his youth, Riju in handling the pressure of her role as Chief (which she does not, leading to the Bridge incident and the jeorpardisation of her people’s safety), and Yunobo in just finding his role in life and his place in the world beyond Goron City. Cinelgen conversely rails against his ‘role’ assigned to him basically at birth – that of a male Gerudo. The catch here is, Cinelgen’s mother never actually took him to Gerudo Town, as she is afraid of how he will be treated. She doesn’t even entertain the notion that a male Gerudo could be accepted, and essentially condemns Cinelgen to his role as an outcast before he ever had a chance at a normal life. And it is Link’s legend – his role as the hero – that inspires Cinelgen to finally take control of his fate and shape the world around him, rather than conforming to its expectations (for…better or for worse) -- See addenda. Baby Boy Inglis also deserves a small mention; he spends the entire work degrading himself as a mere ‘squire’ for his more important friends, but later rises above this role to begin his training as a fully fledged Knight.
History Versus Legend
“Have you considered, Princess, what it means to possess all three?” (The Deku Tree, Chapter 17)I knew I wanted to weave in some deep Zelda lore at some point, and it all sort of just came together in trying to marry the concepts of the Cleansing Ritual, Zelda meeting the fragment of Hylia, and Link ‘meeting’ his father. It started with my theory that Zelda totally, absolutely has the full Trifoce in BOTW, and the dual-theory that the Triforce normally splits to find the most worthy bearers of each of its three virtues. But it didn’t in BOTW, which means two wonderful things;1) Zelda carries all three virtues in balance and, by extension2) Link does tooHence they are whole people, rather than legends that fit into these perfect moulds. I wanted to explore the ways in which Hyrule had lost its history and legends, and there are quite a few examples. Firstly in that the Triforce, Goddesses, and Sacred Realm are never mentioned by name (Zelda also does not recognise the symbols of Din and Farore at the Sacred Grounds). Secondly, the Sacred Realm has become a shell of itself, and Zelda only understands it to be ‘The Other Place’. While she does eventually learn of its significance (deciding to leave the Triforce there) (See addenda), she still never quite learns what it truly is. Even the legends themselves are mostly lost; the Deku Tree only has fragmented legends to tell Zelda, and he prefaces them by saying they are just that – legends. We also see the legend of Ganondorf crop up to haunt Cinelgen, and even then he doesn’t know his actual name (”I was told I would always be compared to that King of Thieves.”). Apart from this, history itself is a sore spot for Hyrule. The camaraderie between the races has mostly been lost, even with the Champions still in living memory, and despite their shared history, the races struggle to play team initially (as Cinelgen describes, the Calamity has taught them to be survivalists first). The key scene is in Ch 20, where Zelda sees the whole of the ‘cycle’ that she and Link are trapped in. As the fragment of Hylia explains, there isn’t actually any way to stop it. Hyrule will never be free of conflict – the only way to subvert legend is to prepare for it, and the only way to prepare for it is almost to reject it. “Hyrule needs more than just fighters,” Zelda says in Ch 22. “It needs people - whole people”. Tying into the first theme, Zelda comes into the view that the best way forward for Hyrule is to let bygones be bygones, and find a system where the whole Kingdom is ready for what comes – not just the two kids chosen by fate to save it. And interestingly, when Link and Zelda find they have ‘all of history at [their] palm’, they reject that too. Zelda uses the Other Place only to look for what she needs to find (Micah) and Link decides against using it at all. Despite what history can teach, there must always be a way to move on.
War Is Personal
"How can I fight when it’s people on both sides?” (Link, Chapter 8)I am not well versed in writing political drama, but I still wanted to incorporate that into From the Ground Up. So I had to plan, plan, plan, and it was the only thing I planned in fine detail. I actually have a spreadsheet that outlines my entire plan for the ‘civil war’ in FTGU, as well as every race’s relations to every other race colour-coded, along with the note ‘This should look like a rave by the time we’re done’. The goal was to paint a complex picture of Hyrule centred around the idea that the Calamity had made its people very self-serving, and that it would take a second major threat (aka Cinelgen) to reunite them. But as I said, I’m not a political writer, so I focused hard on the personal aspects of war. This is why Inglis is such a major character, as he provides us insight into both Cinelgen and Milagre, giving a human face to the antagonists. And we learn that Cilengen’s motivations are mostly personal, as I discussed in the first theme. Cinelgen’s entire plan (as admittedly hokey as it is) is built on the personal. He befriends the disenfranchised, talks of building a new, fairer world, and makes it his MO to have eyes and ears everywhere. His utilisation of the Rito Yahn (Teba’s former apprentice) to influence Yahn’s father Yinli (a prominent Rito advisor) to support him is the best example of this. Beyond that, Cinelgen exploits his Gerudo heritage to fool the Zora into thinking the Gerudo have attacked them, sparking the entire conflict. The only race that he doesn’t infiltrate are the Gorons, simply because they are too happy and pure (bless). I very deliberately made his final downfall the mistreatment of his first allies – the Yiga; Cinelgen takes control of their clan and uses them to capture Hyrule Castle, but neglects them once he has no use for them. Eventually, led by Aurelia, the Yiga rebel. Cinelgen was so focused on manipulating others that he forgot his own people – didn’t even realise that some of the Yiga he massacred would have families – and lost his life because of that. We also see the very real toll that the conflict takes on both Sidon and Riju, perhaps Riju more clearly. And while I know it received a mixed response, I stand by the ending of Chapter 19 – where Riju uses her newfound Champion power to blow up the bridge and end the siege. I did this to show her desperation, and how an individual’s decisions can influence a wider political conflict, and that at the end of the day, despite our machinations, we are all just people. Some General Motifs and Assorted NotesThere are a few motifs in From the Ground Up that I probably did to death. They are:
The Song: Both the literal Song of Time that Zelda learns and is strongly tied to the Master Sword, and the ‘song’ that Link feels when he fights. Lexo’s poem (”His mask not worn as a disguise.“) too, and Kass’ belief in the power of stories, are part of this as well, with the meaning of Lexo’s poem essentially being, ‘We have to believe in ourselves and our stories, even if they are not always the truth”
Water and Weather: again literal and not so. Water is very strongly tied to both rebirth (Link’s dive in Ch 4 and Zelda’s plunge in Ch 14), and grief/emotion (i.e. it’s usually raining when characters are sad, welcome to Obvious Metaphors 101). Characters are compared to storms, the seasons play out the death and rebirth of Hyrule (”Am I party to Hyrule’s funeral?” Link thinks when he sees Hyrule Castle blanketed in snow) and the dust storm in Chapter 1 that Leilo sees is not-so-subtle foreshadowing for Cinelgen’s incoming ‘new regime’.
Objects of purpose: Link and Zelda receive objects of purpose at key moments in their arcs. Link’s are his crossbow and Rhoamet, whereas Zelda’s are her bow and Rito coat. I want to point out that Link makes his crossbow and tames Rhoamet, whereas Zelda is simply given her objects. I did this because Link is effectively already ‘worthy’ (as a Knight and accomplished warrior), and hence must make his new purpose. Zelda, on the other hand, must prove herself as a leader, and subsequently ‘earns’ her objects.
Other random notes about FTGU are:
It was never meant to be a pairing fic: In planning, I actually specifically decided Link and Zelda would not even entertain the idea of getting together until the very last scene. That obviously changed
I stick by the swearing/violence: From the Ground Up took on a much darker tone than I was anticipating, so introducing a level of swearing felt natural. The Cool Fight Scenes ™ and Link/Zelda straight up killing people again also felt natural in my darker version of Hyrule, but I felt this also highlighted how Hyrule had changed to become a more morally grey place - See addenda
There are multiple, unashamed references to The Dollars Trilogy all throughout: Were you gonna die alone, Cinna?
Milagre is based on a very old OC of mine: by the same name. My icon on AO3 is a drawing of her from about six years ago.
Final Thoughts
As I said, most of this just fell into place as I was writing. My only goals were to stay as true to the characters as possible and to give Link and Zelda clear, satisfying arcs. Something I’ll take forward into all future works is that the only real limitation is my own will. Overall, I’m really happy with FTGU and where it ended up. There are still aspects that I want to update/change and there are elements of it that I’m not 100% happy with, but for my first full-length fic (it’s essentially a novel), I’m really proud. I’ll be doing a big, work-wide edit soon, and after that I’ll actually have it printed! For now, thankyou once again to everyone who read it, liked it (hated it), left a review or a comment, made fanart (!!!) or just reached out – you’re all amazing. I can’t thank any of you enough.
Addendum (May 2023)
Thanks for sticking with this! Here are some extra notes to refute or reframe the original 2017 note.
"Zelda must learn to become an effective fighter within the limits of her own strength" -- in the 2023 edit, I realised I disagreed with this initial idea and worked to de-emphasise this point. FTGU is no longer really about Zelda becoming physically strong, but more about her becoming a more well-adjusted person. Hyrule needs whole people after all. In the 2023 edit, Zelda is certainly still a fighter, but there's a lot more focus on her skills as a negotiator and her self-belief.
"It is Link’s legend – his role as the hero – that inspires Cinelgen to finally take control of his fate" -- thanks to Tears of the Kingdom, it's no longer just Link! In Cinelgen's last scene, the 2023 edit now implies that he discovered what's hidden beneath Hyrule Castle and was inspired by that (read: the Demon King) to take on the role of Hyrule's conquerer. Glad that worked out, thematically!
"While [Zelda] does eventually learn of [the significance of the Sacred Realm] (deciding to leave the Triforce there), she still never quite learns what it truly is" -- Zelda no longer leaves her powers in the Other Place in the 2023 edit. She knows that she's part of a re-incarnation cycle now, her descendants are going to need that power. An example of a major change in the 2023 edit. All notable changes are logged here.
"I stick by the swearing/violence" - About that. As I've grown older, I've realised I actually don't. Realism isn't the same thing as profanity, so a lot of the 2023 edit tones down the hyperviolence and swearing. The only characters who still swear are Teba and Cinelgen, because that to me just makes sense.
The two Goron songs (Chapters 17 and 22) are based on Wild Mountain Thyme and Rattlin' Bog. Highly recommend a listen :)
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10557130
|
Moment of Peace
|
{
"Archive Warning": "No Archive Warnings Apply",
"Category": "M/M",
"Characters": null,
"Fandom": "House M.D.",
"Language": "English",
"Rating": "General Audiences",
"author": "by writerdot",
"chapters": "1/1",
"completed": "",
"published": "2017-04-06T00:00:00",
"words": "386",
"Additional Tags": "Fluff, Emotional Hurt/Comfort",
"Relationship": "Greg House/James Wilson",
"Character": null,
"Relationships": null,
"Series": "Disquietude",
"Collections": null,
"Fandoms": null,
"Archive Warnings": null,
"Categories": null,
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}
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Every once in awhile, House knows it gets to be too much for his lover to handle. He's had his sick brother in his life for almost a year now, but the other members of his family still want to live in a pretty denial about it...which makes House want to round them up and lay into them for treating Wilson like they are--by leaving him to deal with a hard situation without their help.On this particular night, however, Wilson has once again had enough. After yet another argument with his parents (he hasn't talked to the alcoholic jack-ass brother since the fight. good riddance to him, House thinks darkly), Wilson's sitting on the couch muttering to himself, though House thinks he could be talking to him. He isn't sure yet, so he levers himself up off the arm chair he'd planted himself in to watch the show, and sits down again next to Wilson. He bumps his shoulder, but doesn't wait for Wilson to look at him. "Look at it this way," House says. "You were finally comfortable to go without me last night. And it went really well, right?"Wilson nods morosely. "Okay, then," House declares. "Think about that. Think about how well it went with Daniel and screw the rest of them.""But they're my family," Wilson says softly, for the thousandth time."They aren't treating you like it," House counters. "And watching you get like this every time you talk to them is making me want to go kick their asses...then they would just have me arrested. Do you really want to bail me out of prison again? I mean, if that's a kink you need to work out, we can, but..."Wilson doesn't smile, but he looks a little less like someone's kicked his cat. "Maybe.""I'm right.""You usually think you are.""So should you."Wilson finally smiles a little and leans sideways so he's against House's shoulder. House doesn't hesitate before he wraps his arm around Wilson for a hug. Wilson sighs. "Thanks."House kisses the top of his head. "I can still go kick the-""No," Wilson interrupts. "That's okay. I appreciate the thought, though.""All right. Offer still stands."Wilson looks at him and smiles, this time it reaches his eyes. "I know."
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10536516
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His Beloved Master
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{
"Archive Warning": "Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings",
"Category": "M/M",
"Characters": "Nnoitra Gilga, Tesla Lindocruz",
"Fandom": "Bleach",
"Language": "English",
"Rating": "Explicit",
"author": "by N_Scribe",
"chapters": "3/?",
"completed": "",
"published": "2017-04-03T00:00:00",
"words": "4,843",
"Additional Tags": "I love these two okay?, I know that this ship is...whatever it is but..., I needed this compilation of stuff so I wrote it, If I drag you into shipping hell with me then I've done my job, But really I will go to hell happily shipping these two",
"Relationship": "Nnoitra Gilga/Tesla Lindocruz",
"Character": null,
"Relationships": null,
"Series": "His Beloved Master (Nnoitra/Tesla Drabbles)",
"Collections": null,
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"Archive Warnings": null,
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"Words": null,
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}
|
#1. Taking CareDisclaimer: Plot is mine and the characters are borrowed in this work of fan-made fiction off of which no money is made. Author’s note: Fluff because I needed fluff. So because I’m not feeling my best; Tesla ends up sick and a certain Quinto Espada ends up taking care of him in this shortish Drabble. No real warnings though hints of m/m feelings and fluff. Just fluff. I’ll probably write more for it at a later time but for now this is what you get. Enjoy. *~*~*~*He was hot, feverish, and did not want to get out of the bed. Except he was sure that if he didn’t someone was going to become quite irate and the last thing he needed was his Master growing irritable with him. So the sweat-slicked blond struggles to rise and ends up falling to the floor with a choked groan. There was no way he could manage it. None. Master Nnoitra was going to be so irate with him. So irate. But Tesla’s body didn’t seem to care because he could not get himself off the cold floor. It felt good against his skin…Maybe just a short nap. Surely he could still accomplish what was needed…...Just a short...nap…Out cold on the floor is where he is found two hours later by an irritable Nnoitra. The snarl dies on the Espada’s tongue as he takes in the crumpled figure. Crossing, he kneels down and fingers brushing sweat damp and hot skin has him biting back a curse. The idiot had worked himself sick. Like he’d been warned he would. Szayelaporro would never let him live this down if he found out after telling him such a thing. And he was sure the pink-haired nuisance would somehow find out because he always seemed to know. But that wasn’t important at the moment. Carefully, he gathers up the form and moves him into the Espada’s own chambers where there was more room. Laying him on the bed, the flushed face and pallid complexion has him huffing again. “Little fool...th’ fuck ya think yer doin’?” But he knew the answer to the question. There was really no need to ask it and certainly not while the male was unconscious. Tesla had only and ever tried to serve and take care of him. To please him. It was annoying as it was endearing though the latter was nothing he’d ever admit. Peeling the soaked clothing from the male’s hot skin just has another set of epithets escaping him as he’d dump the soaked material to the floor and go to get a bucket and a rag. Returning, he sets to cooling the hot skin down trying to ignore the urge to glance down the other’s body no matter how tempting it was. The male was unconscious and this was not a good time to ogle him. But there was a lot of him to see splayed out like he was…His thought-process has him rolling his eye as he focuses on slowly getting the other’s temperature down. ‘Idiot,’ he thinks, ‘Honestly, Tesla, what am I supposed to…’ His thoughts are interrupted by a low mumbled, “Supposed...to be working...Master….’s not going to be happy…” Blinking, he finds himself a little annoyed that it was something that worried the male like this even now. “Ain’t mad, Piglet,” he retorts, “At least not ‘bout that.” “Can’t...fail...him…” Great, he was talking in his feverish state. This certainly wasn’t going to go well if he was too honest. Nnoitra dislikes the twinge of guilt at the other's words. “Ain’t ever failed me, Tesla,” comes the quiet response, “Don’t think ya can actually. Yer not the one failing in this.” ‘I am.’ But he’d never admit that aloud. Too many walls and ears and all that. “Wish...he liked me...Even a little…” These words have him freezing. What had he…”Liked ya? Ah...fuck...No, Piglet, don't be stupid enough to…” “I...know he won’t love me but…” And the Quinto Espada freezes. Love. He’d just… ‘He’s feverish,’ he tries to reason, ‘He doesn’t know what the fuck he’s sayin’. He doesn’t.’ But the problem was that now he’d heard it everything made sense in startling clarity. “He’d be an idiot,” he finally answers quietly, “He’d be a fuckin’ moron to miss how...special ya are.” Fuck. Fuck. Fuck. FUCK. How in the name of Aizen was he supposed to deal with this now?! Dammit, things were not supposed to be this complicated. They weren’t. Feelings were not a part of things. They weren’t in the goddamn plan. But here he was; having what boiled down to a feverish love-confession from the one person in the goddamn place that…That might actually matter. What in the actual fuck?! Deciding that it didn’t, that it couldn’t matter, he just goes back to his task. He’d hope the other didn’t remember this and if asked would deny anything happened. Tesla never needed to know that he’d pretty much declared his love for him. Nnoitra had no intention of telling him. But once he's got him settled and the male is curled up in his bed, he pauses at the door intent on leaving him to his rest and realizes that Tesla fit in his bed. That he could get used to him being there is an even more disturbing thought and he forces himself out of the room. Let the blond sleep it off and then he’d tell him to be careful in the future. Now he needed to find something to go and murder. Surely there were Hollows nearby…He wasn’t on the floor. That is the first thing that Tesla realizes when he wakes up. The second was that he wasn’t in his bed because the space was far too big. Which meant only one thing; he’d been found. By Master Nnoitra. He was in so much trouble. Slowly sitting up, he swallows at the realization that he was naked beneath the covers. Had...No, there was no way that the male had...But then why was he here in such a state? A moment later, the door opens and his attention turns worry filling him at who he might see. The familiar pink-haired Octava doesn’t quite make him feel much better especially not with the grin that appears. “Ah, you’re awake. I was almost sure you would sleep another day or two considering the stress.” “I...did not mean to inconvenience Master Nnoitra. I should apologize at once…” “You will do nothing but rest and regain yourself. Besides, our dear Quinto is just fine slaying Hollows at the moment. You certainly don't want him swinging Santa Teresa at you in the mood he’s in.” Tesla swallows. “I...didn’t mean…” “He’s not mad at you, silly,” Szayelaporro continues, “He’s just...Well, you know him; he doesn’t deal with emotions well at all. Give him some time and let him calm down. You scared him a bit, I think. He’s not used to...someone getting under his Hierro. Let alone close enough for him to worry.” The words have him stilling. Worried? His Master had been worried? “I...Well, I suppose to would be time-consuming to train a new Fraccion…” Amber eyes fill with something close to amusement before the male starts laughing clearly amused at him. “Ah, Tesla,” he chortles, “Honestly, you really don’t...Ah...You are adorable. You both are. But no matter. This particular situation I cannot wait to see play out. It should be most...spectacular.” Confusion fills the blond as he wonders what the male possibly knew that he didn’t. And finds himself too unsure to actually ask him. So he just finds himself settling back against the bed with a quiet, “I...suppose getting better would be best. After all...I am his Fraccion…” Szayelaporro walks further in revealing a covered dish he was carrying. “That is a good way to put it. So just settle and eat. You’ll be fine in a few days.” He was sure he was missing something when the other promptly leaves those eyes still sparkling and his lips curved upwards at the edges. The Octava knew something. Tesla just isn’t courageous enough to find out. He’s dozing when the door opens and Nnoitra slips in. The sight of the dish telling him that Szayel had done as asked and fed the blond. Watching him curled up again has him huffing before he’d set Santa Teresa against the wall and get out of his hooded jacket and boots before approaching the bed. Deciding that it was still his bed and he was allowed to be on it; he slides into it reclining beside the other. The feel of the other shifting and curling against him has him tensing a moment before he’d relax and slide an arm around him. Tesla was sick. He’d give him a pass this time. He’d even allow the light nuzzling that follows trying to ignore the way the male’s breath tickles against his skin and definitely ignores how perfect he fit in his arms. It was just a couple of days. Then he was going back to his own goddamn room. No problem. No problem at all.
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
#2. FallingDisclaimer: Plot is mine and characters are borrowed in this work of fan-made fiction off of which no money is made. Author’s note: Sequel to the previous NnoiTes drabble this takes place three days later. Warnings include NSFW elements and will probably have a third quite NSFW sequel as well because no matter how he tries to avoid his own emotions, Nnoitra finds that Tesla is too tempting for his own good. *~*~*FallingAll he could think about was the fact that he wanted him. It was distracting in ways he wasn’t prepared for. Sighing, he sets his blade against the wall and rubs his face. He should not give in. Could not. If he did then he was sure there would be no going back. But more than that; he would no doubt be addicted to the male which had no place in his plans. But he is tempted. Oh, is he tempted. Damned Fraccion was too alluring for his own good. But then there were parts of him that would have Tesla no other way. The blond was loyal, honest if not annoyingly so, and beyond that; he had an emotional stake in Nnoitra that no one else did. Hell, he honestly cared. That was probably the worst part of all this. Nnoitra knew he was a tool; knew that Aizen was using them. That he was used to as a hollow and even now bothered him very little. But Tesla; that emotionally driven idiot felt deeply for him, protected him, and genuinely liked him. And Nnoitra had no fucking idea how to handle that. So he didn’t. He kept the other at a distance and avoided ever getting close to anything that was deemed too inappropriate. Because he already chose what his path was and he wasn’t deviating. He wasn’t. He lifts Santa Teresa back up inwardly giving himself a mental shake. He couldn’t be bothered with this. Emotions were for humans. For the living. And what was he but some bastard creation of a madman’s who was neither hollow nor Shinigami but some monstrosity of both. And monsters and villains never got happy endings. It was just the way things were. He stalks back for his chambers and pushes open the door before pausing at the sight. Right. He was still in there; spread like he owned the place across his bed. Nnoitra glowers. Honestly, he needed to kick the blond out. He was fine. Had been for three days now. But he couldn’t admit that it was the best sleep he'd had in a long time. So Tesla was still there. It was insane and he had to remind himself that particular aspect belonged to Szayelaporro. He leans Santa Teresa against the wall before getting more comfortable and walking to the bed. He merely watches the other sleep a moment before bringing a hand down to drag the blankets up around him. He’d go and shower and then kick the impudent brat out of his bed. That would be the best option. Hell, the only option that was acceptable. Because nothing else was. Except a hot shower has him more than relaxed and he just crawls into the bed allowing the other to shift until he was back against him; until the Quinto’s arms are once more curled around him and he’s resting his head atop the others. Tomorrow. He’d tell him to go tomorrow. Right now he was just too comfortable. Tomorrow was better. Waking up has the other still in his arms and Nnoitra is definitely not thrilled at how comfortable, how normal this is for him. And as he watches the other rouses sleepily before stilling and gazing up at him. He cannot help the chuckle that escapes before he murmurs, “Ya cannot blame me fer bein’ in my own bed, Piglet.” As he watches the other’s glance lower again, he realizes that might not be what the issue was considering that he’d crawled into his bed quite naked. And watching the flush that colors his face has Nnoitra feeling far too amused. “You...are quite a bit naked.” “Showered ‘fore bed and crawled in. Ya were too deep asleep to wake up so I could warn ya ‘bout the nudity.” He watches the male still before a peculiar expression appears and is suddenly sure that it was a bad idea to have done it seconds before hot fingers curl around a part of his anatomy that was quite a bit interested in the other’s presence there. His hips jerk and he lets out a sharp, “T-Tesla…” “Shh,” the blond whispers softly, “Please, Master...just this once?” The question would be followed by a slow slide of his hand and Nnoitra’s body shudders as pleasure sparks along his nerves. Dammit, this was not a good idea. Not at all but then those fingers would tighten just enough and the pressure has him shifting so that he was on his back with a low groan. He wanted this. Needed it. Fuck it all. Taking it for the allowance it was, the blond moves so that he was in a better position; heat and mischief filling the brown-gold orb before he’d lower his head and let his tongue flick out over the head of his cock. “Nngn! F-fuck...T-Tes…” It draws a low hum of approval before it would be repeated before he’d slowly draw his hot, wet tongue along the length of him obviously deciding upon enjoying the allowance given him. Nnoitra’s fingers tighten into the blankets as he feels his hips shift letting the other have his way. Just this once. He would let himself enjoy this just this once. Except every lick and suck at his skin has him seemingly caught and wanting more and it hits home how much he should not have done this. Because Tesla was willing and good and intent on pleasing him. And then he’d part his lips and press down enclosing him in his mouth and Nnoitra can’t help the ragged sound of pleasure as fingers slide into blond strands. “F-fu...Ahh...Y-yes...Just like that...Fuck...Tesla…” And the encouragement only has him deep-throating him, finding the way he likes to be sucked on and teased and all Nnoitra’s frazzled mind can come up with is how utterly screwed he was if he intended on never allowing this again. Because Tesla was fucking amazing with his mouth. The climax has him panting and blinking almost owlishly at the other as he tries to regain himself. The sight of him licking his lips was entirely too much of an erotic sight and he finds himself reaching to tug him close to kiss him. It wasn’t a desire he was used to but he needed to do this. The taste of himself is strange but it was mixed with a sweeter taste and he finds himself slipping his tongue between the other’s lips to get a deeper taste. Breaking it he stares at the other’s panting, flushed face and realizes that this was beyond stupid of him to allow. He should have told the brat to remove his hand from his person and get out. Instead, he finds himself giving a growled, “Get out of yer clothes. Now.” Fuck. It. all.
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
Disclaimer: Characters and still not mine but are borrowed in this work of fan-made fiction off of which no money is made. I take all the blame for the plot.
Author’s Note: Originally it was supposed to only be a three part set but I’ve decided to make it four (hopefully). I suppose I should apologize for the choppy, viewpoint changing that I’m known for doing without warning. I just like this pairing so you tend to all get the raw stuff. Definitely NSFW so peruse with caution as it takes place direction after the previous drabble.
*~*~*~*~*`
His
He’d been too forward and he knew it but Tesla hadn’t been able to resist once he realized that his master was naked. The feel of him hot and thick between his fingers had been so much better and he was glad when he’d been granted the opportunity that he’d wanted since promising his services and his loyalty to the Espada. Back then he’d only been Octava but that really hadn’t mattered. It had never been his rank that had drawn Tesla to him.But that was a thought-process for another time the blond decides as the command is issued. He slips out of his shirt before sliding his boxers off his hips flushing slightly at now being naked before the other. “Ah, Tesla…” the other murmurs approvingly, “Yer too fuckin’ temptin’…ya know that? Damned if I know how I’ve managed to resist till now…”The words fill him with heat but more than that; he just wants the other to do as he’d been wanting and lay claim to the only thing left for him to have because he had everything else Tesla was. “Master…please? Even…if it’s just once. I will never asked again but…Let me…let me have you to myself. Just once.”He was asking far too much and he knew it but if he would just grant him this one allowance then Tesla would accept and call himself more than satisfied.Languidly the other stretches before shifting so that he can push Tesla to the side and sit up. The blond watches and waits wondering what he was going to decide. “Lay back, Tesla. Ya want me to yerself then that’s what yer gonna get.” The words would be obeyed as more heat seems to flood him as he lays back watching him eye him; gray seeming to shift to molten silver as those lips curve into a hungry smile; a look that has heat filling him because it was something he’d wanted to see for the longest time. “Been the first time someone’s watched me get hungry and not tried to flee…just so ya know.”Tesla responds with, “Yes, I am aware,” before reaching to lightly touch the side of his face and adding, “Devour me if it pleases you, Master.” He probably didn’t need to say it; it was obvious in the willingness he displayed being beneath him but it was worth it for the sight of the male’s tongue flicking between his lips.“Shouldn’t offer yerself like that to a predator,” he murmurs leaning close, his breath ghosting along the other’s skin. Tesla’s response is to tilt his head baring his throat for him. His lips press against the skin tongue darting out to take a taste. The intake of breath earns a husky chuckle before he’d nip and then suck at the skin. If he didn’t want to get addicted then this definitely wasn’t the way to go about that. Not at all. Because every touch, taste, and sound was drawing him in. And he’d move down exploring the figure before him satisfying both his own curiosity and both of their desires. Tesla merely shifts and squirms allowing and definitely encouraging the actions. And it was the worst idea he’d ever had because as his lips enclose a nipple and he feels him shudder, hears him whine low in his throat; Nnoitra knows that he’s lost; that there is no way in hell he’d ever be satisfied with just once. Fingers slide down to curl around hot flesh and he finds himself stroking slowly, lightly as he continues enjoying the way Tesla arches and cries out; the way his breathing hitches.Every action merely cements what he knew all along; this male was his and his alone. Not Aizen’s; HIS. And there is something particularly pleasing about that thought to him. His thumb lightly rubs over the leaking slit as he watches desire darken the male’s eye watches him losing his fight with his composure.Well, if that got that sort of reaction then he had to wonder what…And his head would lower, tongue flicking between his lips to brush the hot skin. The jerk and sharp gaspy breath it earned him was exquisite. It just earns more explorations as the Quinto finds himself quite a bit interested in what reactions he’d get if he touched him in other ways.Tesla wasn’t sure what his surrender would earn him but the feel of that tongue tracing him was definitely not on the list. While a fantasy he had; he’d definitely never envisioned it coming to fruition. His fingers tangle in the sheets as his hips open wider and he shifts restlessly trying to keep from pressing closer to the other. The dark chuckle tells him that the other found him amusing in this way. “Pl-please…M-master…”Fuck if that wasn’t so much worse because it does things to him he’s sure it shouldn’t; invokes desires in him that he knew would mess things up all the way around. There just was no way in heaven, hell, or in between that Nnoitra could bring himself to stop. Not this time. So instead, he parts his lips and presses down as he holds the other’s lips still. This was certainly not the actions he should be taken, something tells him but the choked, strangled sound as he relaxes his throat and draws the blond’s flesh deeper into his mouth is entirely worth it.Tesla finds himself caught between heaven and hell as Nnoitra chooses to explore him like this and his head lolls back fingers squeezing and releasing convulsively at the hot moist heat around his cock. It was too surreal and part of him is glad that he cannot quite wrap his mind around the truth of things because he’s pretty sure he’d have several complaints about how this was not proper. But all that occurs to him is the same choked, whined words that escape him like a mantra, “S-soo good…please…yes…”Of course, his Master is enough of a tease to stop before he can fully enjoy this, gaze darkened in mischief and amusement. “M-Master…”“Patience,” comes the husky chuckle, “We’ve got all night. And I wanna enjoy this.” His gaze promised that they both would which is what settles Tesla somewhat.“Alright, but I don’t think you should…”Nnoitra leans forward and presses his mouth against the others to keep him from saying what he was sure was coming. Whatever stupid “acceptable” actions were, he didn’t care much for anything in the way of rules or regulations or anything in that direction.And he’d reteach his subordinate that. Multiple times if he had to.Lightly, he traces a finger up the still aroused now damp skin enjoy the sharp breath and whiny moan that escapes the blond. “Ya know,” he says conversationally as if he wasn’t in the midst of making a goddamn mess of him, “If yer gonna complain ‘bout me doin’ that then I can think of somethin’ ya might get far more disagreeable on.”Tesla blinks slowly as he was still quite a bit hazy and is not allowed to formulate the question brewing before he finds himself suddenly rolled over. “Stay still,” comes the low command. Tesla swallows but complies feeling extremely vulnerable and quite exposed like this. The feel of fingers sliding along his lower spine before cupping his ass has him trembling and more than a little concerned about what his Espada might be planning.“M-Master…what…”“Hush,” comes the others chide, “Ya worry too much, Tes.”He’d point out that he was pretty sure anyone in this position would be extremely concerned and can only manage a sharp gasped breath as lips press against his skin starting at the end of his spine and then slowly moves down as Tesla squirms somewhat at the sensations. While a fantasy he’d had a time or two he certainly hadn’t expected the other to do this on his own. And is even less sure that he was truly going to…And his breathing nearly derails as his lips move lower still.Was he actually…Oh…oh god, he was. Tesla’s fingers grip the fabric of the others sheets a whine escaping as he feels the tip of the others tongue pressing against the clamping muscles of his entrance. He wasn’t…he would not dare…Nnoitra does dare; pressing his tongue in deep making his back arch as his lips part and a whining, plaintive sound escape at the feel. Oh, gods Tesla was not expecting this; not from the male he’d follow to whatever ends he demanded.The dark chuckle against his skin tells him he was pleasing his chosen Espada who licks at him deeply making his nerves flare with bliss. “M-Master…please…oh….oh god….please…don’t stop…”And it would seem to be all the other would need to hear and Tesla would find him withdrawing the appendage before shoving it in with more force. His hips buck and he cries out fingers gripping the sheets for dear life as his Master had a most wicked tongue and more than that; seemed to highly enjoy using it.Tesla cannot help the way his body responds; the way he pants, whines, and begs the other for more as his body undulates and squirms fingers gripping the sheets for purchase and face pressed into the pillow when he could not bear hearing himself sound so absolutely desperate.Of course if he does it for too long, he finds his hair gripped as the other reaches and tugs his head back making it clear that the Espada busy tormenting him was intending on hearing what he was doing to him.And it would end up sparking hot enough pleasure that a climax roars through him leaving him panting and struggling to get his bearings back. And from behind him, he hears Nnoitra chuckle. “Really enjoyed that, I see. Certainly gonna need to put that on the list of things that have ya makin’ the best sounds, Tes.”He’d blush but at the moment he was having a hard enough time getting his thoughts in order. The blond is still trying to wrap his mind around it as he watches the male reach and draw a jar from the nightstand. Somehow, considering everything the sight of lube is enough to have his face heating up. Noticing, Nnoitra chuckles bemusedly. “Really, yer gonna get shy from this? Heh, adorable.”“‘M not,” comes the protest.“Oh, I think ya are,” Nnoitra counters, “And since I’m the Espada we go with what I think.”There is a moment where Tesla contemplates throwing a pillow at him but decides that it might not be a good idea all things considered. “Fine,” he settles with.This has Nnoitra chuckling. “Aww,” he teases, “Don’t be so put off, ‘sides we’ll get to the best parts if ya’d stop bein’ so worried ‘bout things.”“There are policies for a reason,” comes his immediate protest.“Well, I’ll make it simple fer ya then; the only rules that matter behind the door to my palace are mine,’kay? And my rules state that I can do whatever th’ fuck I want to what is mine. And yer mine, right?”“I am.”“Then there ya go. Now roll over cause I wanna see yer face when I open ya. Next time I’ll have yer legs over my shoulders so I can see yer face when I tongue fuck ya into oblivion.”Next time…Well, that was promising if nothing else, so the blond settles himself as commanded. In the end, he’d do whatever Nnoitra wanted because it was what he wanted. And Tesla lived to serve the Quinto.That was all that was needed between them.
|
10523190
|
In Your Dreams
|
{
"Archive Warning": "No Archive Warnings Apply",
"Category": "F/M",
"Characters": null,
"Fandom": "방탄소년단 | Bangtan Boys | BTS",
"Language": "English",
"Rating": "Not Rated",
"author": "by aichan11",
"chapters": "1/1",
"completed": "",
"published": "2017-04-02T00:00:00",
"words": "3,927",
"Additional Tags": "One Shot, Fluff",
"Relationship": "Jung Hoseok | J-Hope & Reader",
"Character": "Jung Hoseok | J-Hope",
"Relationships": null,
"Series": null,
"Collections": null,
"Fandoms": null,
"Archive Warnings": null,
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|
Hoseok/YouGenres: Oneshot, FluffWord count: 3,924 words~•~•~•~You're here again. In the all-consuming darkness, and honestly you're not sure if your eyes are closed or if you are simply in a place where light does not exist. You'd say there is an absence of not only light, but also heat - the chill from the surroundings threaten to seep into your bones and freeze your insides. However, this wouldn't be true. There is a warmth that surrounds you, comforting, warming, reassuring you in the disorienting pitch-black space that is alien to you.This warmth, like everything else here, is mysterious to you. You're desperate to reach out and touch it, but you're unable to move. The source is unknown to you, and it is baffling how you can feel the warmth while feeling and knowing that everything else around you is mind-numbingly cold. Like being in a warm bath in a bathroom in winter with no power - no light, no heating, the bathroom tiles chilling to the touch.Again, panic starts to set in when your efforts to move, to do anything, really, are met with failure. Your brain is commanding you to scream and struggle but your muscles are simply not cooperating. You try and try but nothing happens. You want to cry in frustration yet the tears can't seem to materialise either. Until you feel a force pulling you...... and you wake up. Frowning, you lifted your arm to cover your eyes. The sunlight is muted by the blue curtains but it is still blinding after the total darkness that was your dream. Slowly, you adjusted to the reality where there is light shining though the windows and heat coming from the radiator, and you stumble into the bathroom to take a shower.A while later, your roommate finds you at the dining table, a blank look upon your face as you cradle the cup of coffee that is slowly cooling in your hands."I'd say 'good morning', but I have a feeling that only applies to me," she says teasingly.Her words snap you into action, and you mumble "mmhmm" before sipping your drink. Mornings after that recurring dream always put you in a quiet, contemplative state, and your roommate knows you well enough to pick up on it."Did you have that dream again?" She asks with concern in her voice."Yeah."She pours herself a cup from the coffee pot and sits in the chair facing you. "You've been having the same dream for months. Maybe you should go see a doctor.""And tell the doctor what, that I have dreams when I sleep?" You scoffed. "It's normal to have dreams. I don't even have it every night." You gulp down the rest of your drink and push your chair back to wash your cup.You could tell that she wants to argue, so you quickly grabbed your backpack with a "See you later!" And head out to campus.The day drags on, with you having trouble focusing on the lectures, the dream consuming your thoughts. At one point during the last lecture of the day you just stop taking notes, causing your friend to tap your shoulder to bring your focus back to the lecture."Are you okay?" Namjoon whispers, glancing at your less than half-filled notebook. You peek at his; he has filled it with small, neat handwriting and is about to turn the page to start on a new one."Damn, I totally spaced out." You sigh as the lecturer dismisses the class. "Can I borrow your notes?"Namjoon flashes you his trademark smile with dimples and hands his notebook. "Sure. If there's anything you don't understand, don't hesitate to ask.""Thanks." I smile at him gratefully. "I'll give this back tomorrow."He nods and the two of you leisurely walk out into the campus grounds, watching other students mill about, chatting amongst each other, hanging out or heading outside. You take a deep breath, trying to clear your mind after a long day of lectures and mostly, that disturbing dream. Namjoon walks beside you in comfortable silence, his long legs taking small steps to match your pace.You shiver in the cold winter air. Namjoon immediately notices and laughs. "It has gotten cold lately hasn't it? Wanna get a drink?"Frankly you are not really in the companionable mood, even with Namjoon, who is one of your closest friends. However, you figure that a distraction from the dream may do you some good, so you agree and start to head towards your favourite cafe. Minutes later, Namjoon sits across the small table from you, both enjoying the heat given off by your hot drinks."So what's up with you?" Namjoon asks without preamble. "It's rare to see you so distracted."You consider telling him about your dream, then stop yourself. For some reason it feels too intimate to share with anyone. Even your roommate only found out after weeks of pestering. The dream is something that is precious to you, even though you don't know why. Something that you want to hold close and keep to yourself. So you just smile at him and shrug."Just in one of those moods, I guess."From Namjoon's panicked expression and quick change in the subject, you guess that he thinks that it's something to do with the 'time of the month', but you do not bother to correct him. The next hour or so is spent just talking to him about this and that; you and Namjoon have a lot of interests in common and even though there are some things you disagree about, you always enjoy the banter and exchange of opinions.The sun has just set and the night chill has started to set in when you leave the cafe. You walk with Namjoon for a little more before going your separate ways to your own apartments. Feeling more perky and cheerful than before, you forget that your roommate has the night off and is at home.When you see her fixing dinner in the kitchen, you expect her to continue pestering you about your dream, but she doesn't touch the subject all through dinner. It is only when you two are lounging on the couch watching 27 Dresses for the millionth time that she comments on it."You're looking more alive."You simply nod and reach for more popcorn. You're hoping that your lack of response will end the subject but you should have known that your roommate isn't the type to stop until she says what she wants to say, especially during a movie that she can quote the lines to."I think you should try to find the root of this. I can see that it's really affecting you, and I'm not sure that it's a good thing."You sigh. "It's not like I'm losing sleep over it," you say. "It's just a dream, I'm sure it's nothing." Even as the words come out of your mouth, you know it's a lie. You can't help feeling like the dream is significant; just thinking about it gives you the notion that this dream is trying to lead you to something very important, and you don't want it to stop."Well, I hope that you don't get it again." You can't reply to her statement without outright lying, so you keep quiet and this time she doesn't pursue the topic.And for a while after that you start thinking that her words may have become a reality, until the dream comes again about a week later.~•~•~•~It is the same dream again, yet it is very different from before. It's like a numbing drug that has paralyzed your whole body before has worn off. All your senses that you have tried to use before, save for your sight, have been returned to you, sharp and acute. Your sense of touch tells you that although the freezing cold that has surrounded you before remains, the warmth is not simply a feeling without a source anymore.You can touch it. The origin of the comforting warmth is the heat radiating from a person. You're still deprived of sight but you can feel protective arms holding you close. The musky, pleasant smell of cologne and strong arms belonging to a man. You have instinctively wrapped your own arms around him in return, however, you are still unable to move. The inability to see his face is extremely frustrating.Like every time you have had this dream, you try to struggle against the cruel restrictions set upon you, trying to get a glimpse of him, even though you have no idea if that is even possible, given that all you can see is still total darkness. Your attempts this time, surprisingly, are short-lived. His presence is so calming that it doesn't take long for you to give in and just enjoy his embrace.And for the first time, the thought runs through your mind: I never want to wake up.However, it is a dream, and by its nature, you have to wake up from it. You groan, partly from getting used to being in reality again, but if you are honest with yourself, it is mostly due to the sense of loss. You belong in his arms. Then you catch yourself. This is a dream. You can't lose yourself in it.That morning you take more time to get ready for classes, trying to rid yourself of the silly notions that seem to be taking over you. Fortunately, by the time you leave your room, your roommate has gone, so you don't have to try to pretend to be your normal self. You're not even sure if you can.You're sure that Namjoon notices your silent demeanor, but he refuses to comment on it, giving you a chocolate bar instead. Laughter is hard to resist as it becomes apparent that he has no idea how a woman's cycle works and it puts you in a more cheerful state.It is a Friday night, and your roommate is psyched for a night out after a tiring week, but you're not in the mood. You sit on the couch, resolute, as she tries to persuade you to join her and your friends for a round of drinks while getting ready herself."Are you serious? You want to spend the night alone in this drab apartment? Come on, let's go out! Everyone will be there!" She plops onto the seat beside you. "Namjoon will be there."You ignore the nudge that she gives you, frowning. "So what? I see him all the time in campus.""Ugh, you're so oblivious!" She throws her hands up in the air. "He obviously has a crush on you!""WHAT?!" This is definitely news to you.She rolls her eyes at your ignorance. "Everyone knows about it. You'd be blind not to see it."You refuse to believe her, even for a second. "I won't believe it unless he tells me himself.""Suit yourself," she said as she stands up, apparently deciding that persuading you is a waste of time when she can use it to get some drinks in her. "But he's head over heels for you."You shake her head at her in response. Not long after she leaves, you climb into bed. You're not particularly sleepy, but you're desperate to fall asleep and return to him.~•~•~•~You have no idea what you have done right, or what you have done to deserve this, but finally, finally, you are able to see. For what it's worth, it isn't a lot. Everything is still pitch-black, but it's like a dim light shines upon you and him, and you are able to look up at the man who has been giving you warmth and reassurance in these haunting dreams throughout all these months.The sight simply takes your breath away. You have never seen a more beautiful man in your life. Sharp jawline, delicate nose, inviting lips, and wide eyes staring back at you in wonderment. It is not unlike the expression that you're sure is showing on your face, and you wonder if, like you, this is the first time he has set eyes upon the person he has been embracing all along.For a few moments, both of you simply stare at each other. You're desperately drinking in every aspect of him; his breathtaking face, his perfect height that allows you to gaze up at him without craning your neck too much and rest your head on his chest comfortably, his strong arms holding you securely against him, his intoxicating smell that calms your beating heart into a nearly comatose state of happiness. Yes. This is where you belong.The dream does not let you go easily this time. You gasp as you bolt upright from your sleeping position, panting hard. Your heart actually hurts, and you cover your face with your hands, crying. You don't know why the dream is affecting you this much, but you can't help your feelings. Its grip on you is extremely strong and relentless, rendering you helpless to fight against it.You don't know how long you sat in bed shedding tears, but eventually you get up and walk into the living room lethargically. You've only sat on the couch for a couple of minutes, staring at the TV screen unseeingly when your roommate crash through the door, hopelessly drunk."Someone's up early!" She chirps. A glance at the clock shows that it is in the early hours of the morning, and the sun is about to come up soon. In the edge of your consciousness, you hear her saying something, but you can't seem to register the words so you remain silent."Hey, are you even listening?" She says indignantly, stepping around the coffee table to face you. It is then that she sees your tear-stained face, and she quickly sobers up somewhat."Honey, what's wrong?" Her voice is laced with worry, yet still you can't formulate an answer. She tries shaking you several times until you turn your head to look at her. Your voice cracks as you finally answer her. "The dream... there is a man. A man was holding me. He has been holding me all this time."She frowns as she tries to make sense of your words through her hazy alcohol-induced state. "A man? Who is he?""I don't know," you say quietly. "All I know is, he is the one. He's my destiny." You don't know how you know this. You just do. Nothing has ever felt this right before. You have never been more sure of anything in your life.Your roommate has always thought that you are taking this string of dreams way too seriously. You don't blame her, because she doesn't know how strongly you feel about this. If you put yourself in her shoes, you can understand why she is angry and frustrated with you."Don't you realise that you're being consumed by these dreams? They're dreams, for goodness' sake! They're not real. You don't even know if this man exists. Meanwhile, there is a perfectly nice, good-looking, smart guy who is so into you that it's crazy. You can't let these dreams stand in the way of a chance at real happiness!"You're not so deluded that you can't see the logic in her argument. Everything that she's saying makes perfect sense, yet you just can't let this go. On the other hand, you don't want to argue with her because you know that she can't possibly understand how you feel so you just smile and nod at her."I should get some more sleep, maybe I'll feel better in the morning." You say to her in a placating tone. "You should get some sleep too."Hearing your agreement, her face crumples with relief and she lets you go, stumbling into her room. After her door clicks shut, you lay down on the couch, imagining the man, until you fall into a dreamless sleep.~•~•~•~You wake up several hours later. The intense feeling has not let up on bit, and you clutch at your chest. The ache is so strong that you wonder if it's actually physical. Your roommate is still in her room, presumably sleeping off her hangover. You get up to shower and quietly leave the apartment.The morning is still young, the park that you're strolling through is mostly empty except for a few joggers on their morning run. You attempt to sort out your thoughts and feelings. Even though the dreams retain their blurry, mysterious, disorienting qualities, everything about the man is excruciatingly clear, so painfully sharp that it can't be a figment of your imagination. You lose track of the time that you spend wandering around the park aimlessly, and even though the walk doesn't lessen the certainty of your belief, it does calm your nerves by the time you arrive at the intersection near your apartment.You're so absorbed in your thoughts that you nearly miss him. The man in your dreams. He is walking briskly along the sidewalk across the street, his hands buried in the pockets of his sweater, exhaling puffs of breath in the cold winter air.Your jaw drops and you feel as if your own breath has been knocked out by a ton of bricks. He is real. Despite your confidence, you can hardly believe that the man in your dreams is real, and is right in front of your eyes. Your legs urge you to move towards him, but your mind is sound enough to take heed of the red light and the cars moving in front of you. You want to call out to him, but you don't even know what to call him. And even if you do, you're too far away for him to hear.By the time the light turns green, he has rounded the corner of the block and is out of sight. Your heart race as you run across the road towards his direction. Upon reaching the corner, you look around, desperately looking for the tall, lean man, but you have lost him. The walk back to your apartment after some time trying to find him is quick, all the time doing your best to blink back the tears forming in your eyes. Upon reaching the apartment, you lock yourself in your room and cry your eyes out for the remainder of the day.~•~•~•~It has been a month since you saw that man. A month since you last have that dream. Your roommate obviously doesn't believe that you saw him, but she decides to humour you anyway and ease up on the idea of you dating Namjoon, at least for now. You know that she is mainly relieved that the dream has not visited you since that day, but you yourself are reeling from its absence.Every day feels incomplete to you now, and you go through daily motions without much thought, barely functioning. You can tell that your friends, especially your roommate and Namjoon, are getting increasingly worried about you, so you try to stay as cheerful and upbeat as you can, even though everyone is aware of the façade.Between the two of them, they manage to cajole you into joining them for karaoke. You can't mope around forever, and you try to convince yourself, like you have been doing these past few weeks, that everything really is just your imagination. You are not successful, but you bundle up in warm clothes to go out anyway. There's no harm in spending the night out with your friends. It might even lift your spirits, which has been in the dumps lately.After about an hour of singing your lungs out, you step outside the crowded karaoke room for some fresh air. Spring is approaching, but it is still very cold. Inwardly cursing yourself for not bringing gloves, you turn and walk towards the convenience store to buy yourself a hot drink.Suddenly, a hand grabs your wrist. Although it is gentle, the surprise makes you gasp and turn around to face... him. You feel your eyes growing into the size of saucers as you look upon the man from your dreams. He is looking at you in shock as well, even though he is the one who stopped you in your tracks.A few seconds pass before he catches himself, clearing his throat. But his hand does not let go of your wrist. "Uhm... " He hesitates, and you want to help him finish his sentence, but your heart is threatening to burst out of your chest and you can't get any words out. He looks just as he does in your dreams. Actually, he looks even better, his features sharp and clear, lit by the street lamp right above you.His grip on your wrist tightens somewhat as he attempted another explanation, "I'm sorry, I know you don't know me, and I don't know you either. You'll probably think I'm crazy, but for months now I've been dreaming of you, and I just..." He growls in frustration as your breath hitches in excitement. "I'm really sorry, but I just have to do this."With that, he grabs you by the waist and pulls you into a tight hug. You breath gets knocked out of you by the impact, but your hands immediately wrap around his body, reveling in his warmth that is intensified by reality, grabbing his knit sweater and inhaling his scent deeply. If his embrace in your dream feels perfect, the real thing exceeds that by leaps and bounds. This is right. "Oi, Hoseok! What the hell are you doing?!"The man turns his head and you peek around his shoulder to see a group of guys you can only assume are his friends. "Go on without me! Tell Taehyung I'm sorry I can't make it!" He shouted.The pale boy who called out to him looks cross, but doesn't argue. Hoseok doesn't wait for them to leave before turning his attention back to you."Sorry about that," he says. "Sorry about all this, really. I'm sure you must be mad at this stranger suddenly hugging you out of nowhere. I don't know how to explain this, but I'm honestly not taking advantage of you or anything..." He trails off, at a loss of words, his hands around you starting to drop to his sides reluctantly.But no words are needed. He has been having the same dreams you have. You're not crazy. It is not a dream. It is not just your wishful thinking, or your imagination. This is real. You shake your head and dive back into his arms. His response is so quick that it has to be instinct, wrapping you in his tight embrace again.You bury your head in his chest, tears falling, unbidden, wetting his clothes. But this time they are tears of happiness. "I've been dreaming about the same thing. I've missed you so much." It is a strange thing to say to someone you just met, but you haven't really just met. This man is real. This feeling is real. You just know that you belong in this man's arms. Always. "You're my destiny." His hold around you tightens at your words, coming to the same realisation that you have had the same dreams, and feel the same way that he does."And you are mine."
|
10574376
|
TF2 Oneshots
|
{
"Archive Warning": "Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings",
"Category": "M/M",
"Characters": "RED Demoman, BLU Demoman, RED Scout, BLU Scout, RED Engineer, BLU Engineer, RED Soldier, BLU Soldier, RED Heavy, BLU Heavy, RED Medic, BLU Medic, RED Spy, BLU Spy, RED Sniper, BLU Sniper, RED Pyro, BLU Pyro, Miss Pauling (Team Fortress 2), Administrator (Team Fortress 2), Scout's Mother (Team Fortress 2)",
"Fandom": "Team Fortress 2",
"Language": "English",
"Rating": "Teen And Up Audiences",
"author": "by FoggedFantasy",
"chapters": "58/?",
"completed": "",
"published": "2017-04-16T00:00:00",
"words": "27,152",
"Additional Tags": "Alternate Universe, oneshots, One Shot Collection, One Shot",
"Relationship": null,
"Character": null,
"Relationships": "Engineer/Soldier (Team Fortress 2), Scout/Sniper (Team Fortress 2), Medic/Scout (Team Fortress 2), Engineer/Scout/Medic, Heavy/Scout (Team Fortress 2), Engineer/Scout/Sniper (Team Fortress 2), Engineer/Spy (Team Fortress 2), Engineer/Pyro (Team Fortress 2), Demoman/Scout/Soldier (Team Fortress 2), Demoman/Engineer/Heavy/Medic/Pyro/Scout/Sniper/Soldier/Spy (Team Fortress 2), Medic/Soldier (Team Fortress 2), Demoman/Medic (Team Fortress 2), Demoman/Scout (Team Fortress 2), Engineer/Medic (Team Fortress 2), Pyro/Spy (Team Fortress 2), Sniper/Spy (Team Fortress 2), Heavy/Medic (Team Fortress 2), Medic/Spy (Team Fortress 2), Medic/Soldier/Sniper (Team Fortress 2), Engineer/Sniper (Team Fortress 2), Soldier/Spy (Team Fortress 2), Engineer/Scout (Team Fortress 2), Demoman/Engineer (Team Fortress 2), Demoman/Soldier (Team Fortress 2), Scout's Mother/Spy (Team Fortress 2)",
"Series": null,
"Collections": null,
"Fandoms": null,
"Archive Warnings": null,
"Categories": null,
"Bookmarks": null,
"Chapters": null,
"Comments": null,
"Completed": null,
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}
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“Does it hurt?” The engineer asked, nervously moving to support the frail Scout.
“Nah, I love bein’ impaled with wooden pikes- can’t feel a thing!” The scout replied sarcastically, before coughing up more blood onto the already crimson terrain.
“I get it-stupid question. Let’s just getcha to the doc then,” The engineer mumbled sheepishly, guiding the other man to the medic as quickly as he could manage. As soon as the Texan was close enough to the door, he kicked it.
“‘Mergency case, Doc! Open up!” He called.
“Verdamnit-” The medic growled, raising from his spot by his cluttered desk to open the door. “Vhat happened here?” He asked, quickly helping the engineer move their injured scout to his medical table.
As the engineer got the moaning boy comfy, the doctor quickly set up his medigun, immediately releasing the red stream of healing, well… healing stream. No one really knew if it was magic or science, not even the medic (although he’d never admit that).
The scout groaned, desperately trying to grab and pull the wood out of his chest, but his hands, slick with his own blood, couldn’t get the friction.
“Hey there, pardner, calm down-” The engineer murmured, trying to soothe the younger, but the doctor shook his head.
“Dell, I’m gonna need you to get ready to pull that thing out for him,” The medic ordered, his tired eyes bright with determination.
The engineer gulped, nodding before getting in the position to do so.
“On my count, Dell,” The medic instructed, turning up the power on his gun. “Three, two, one!”
And with that the engineer tugged out the bloody pike, falling backwards onto the floor with the force.
“AUUGH!” The scout screamed, flailing his fists in pain.
“Oh hush, don’t be such a baby,” The medic scolded, seizing his arms and securing them to the table with some impromptu bandage binds. “You’re getting in my vay,” He told the other sternly, beginning to get some rubbing alcohol and a needle and thread, whilst the medigun worked away at repairing the punctured lung and broken muscles. The medic watched, hand by the switch in order to turn it down when needed. As the lung and muscle finished repairing themselves, the medic turned the medigun off, eliciting an anguished moan from the scout.
“Hush, hush,” The medic shooshed, sterilizing the needle and thread before he leaned over the scout, beginning to sew his chest back together.
“It hurts, oh fuck it hurts, Doc!” The scout cried, his arms struggling against the binds.
“It vill be over soon, liebchen, stay with me now. You’re doing good. Good job, it’s nearly done,” The medic cooed, working quickly to seal the wound.
Once it was over the medic began sponging the quickly drying blood off of the younger’s body. Kennicky whined, panting at the strain his body had just gone through.
“Shh, liebchen, it’s over now. It’s finished. Good job, see? You’re clean. Calm down,” The medic soothed again. He pet his patient’s head, waiting for the other to calm down before he undid the binds.
After a few minutes of breathing and coming back to reality, Kennicky sat up, wincing a bit, before giving the medic a gentle hug.
“Thanks, Josef,” He sighed.
“Of course, Kennicky, but do tell me- how did you get such an injury on a ceasefire day?”
At this, the sheepish engineer in the corner winced. “‘T was my fault, doc. I was havin’ him install some cameras by the sniper towner ‘nd I called out to ask if he had enough wire and he got distracted and fell.”
“Oh, I see,” The medic began.
“It was fine, Dell- ya didn’t mean ta- ‘sides, it was a good question. I’m just the asshole who fell, haha.” Kennicky smiled, holding out his arms to the engineer for a hug.
“Ya ain’t an asshole, son,” Dell murmured, going over. He carefully hugged the scout and pressed a kiss to his cheek. “Sorry ‘bout that, though, thanks fer tryin’ ta help me.” He sighed, nuzzling the other’s shoulder softly.
“Dell, it’s fine, really,” The scout smiled, patting the Texan’s back.
“Mrr, thanks, honey,” The Texan smiled gratefully, giving the scout a squeeze on the hand.
“Of course, Dell,” The other grinned back.
“Vill you be hanging the cameras up still today?” The doctor asked warily.
“No, probably not. Maybe I’ll get Lucas to help me out tomorrow though,” The engineer replied.
“I see, alright zhen. Be more careful next time, please. Now, if you both don’t mind, I have some business to attend to. And Kennicky? Take it easy today.
“Alright then, Doc,” The scout pouted, and the engineer and he left the room.
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
Scout shivered, nuzzling into the stronger man’s arms in hopes to escape winter’s cold nipping at his nose.
“Aw, tiny baby man is cold?” The Russian chuckled, picking the other up.
Scout shivered, leaning into the other man’s chest. He took deep, shuddery breaths. “Nah, I’m just peachy- ‘s like I’m in Hawaii,” he grumbled.
The Russian laughed. “Aw, if tiny man ate good would not have problem,” he smiled, one of his big hands petting the scout’s hair appreciatively.
The smaller sighed, contented by the warm, heavy hand. “I
do
eat- I just don’t gain weight,” He grumbled.
“Is all the running,” Heavy chuckled.
“Yeah, and it’s kinda part of my job,” The scout sulked.
“Poor baby tiny man. Do not pout,” The larger comforted, smiling and pressing a kiss to the other’s forehead.
“Fine, I guess,” The scout groaned, nuzzling into the other’s neck. “I love you,” he whispered.
“I love you too,” The heavy grinned.
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
Bright sunlight lit the corridors as soldier popped up from his bed, ready to face the day. Starting his routine with five jumping jacks, he counted, screeching “USA!”. It was a miracle the small Texan not more than five feet away didn’t stir. Once the overly-energetic man finished, he gave the exhausted engineer an appreciative kiss on the forehead.
“Ya gotta get up soon, American Dream,” The soldier began, his voice a deep, scratchy baritone, “but you worked hard last night, so I’ll let you sleep for now.”
The smaller man grumbled in response, wrapping his muscular arms around his pillow as he rubbed his face into it. It was simply too early.
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
“Where’d he go?” The tired “Aussie” asked, running a hand through his tousled hair.
“Out,” Engie replied dismissively, avoiding eye contact with everyone in favor of sipping his light morning roast coffee (of which he seemed to love).
“‘S he runnin’ ou-there?” The taller man asked, affectionately patting his other lover’s head.
“Think so, what’d ya do?” Engie questioned, finally glancing up to make eye contact with the taller man.
“He’s upset ‘cause I was teasing him ‘bout being a horny lil’ bugga, and then he went storming off telling me to fuck off and if I don’t like it then go spend time with one ‘a you ‘old sadsacks’- his words- not mine,” Austin replied, rolling his shoulders with a tense sigh.
“So’re ya gonna go out there and find him?” Engie asked, affectionately rubbing the sniper’s hip.
“Dunno, ya think I should yet?” The sniper frowned, not wanting to stir up more shit in this already-too-dramatic morning.
“Y’know if ya don’t soon he’ll run himself dead,” Engie sighed, nudging his concerned sweetheart in the back.
“Mrr, well, if ya think it’d help,” Austin sighed, placing a little kiss to the top of his shorter lover’s forehead before heading out to confront the pissy scout.
After a minute of waiting, the young scout bounded across the far corner of the BLU base. As he jogged over he obviously tried to dodge the sniper, however he didn’t persist when the other man held out a hand obstructing his path. With the scout paused in front of him, Austin took a moment to lick his lips and collect his thoughts.
“I didn’t mean anything by it, Scott,” The gravelly voice apologized as the elder man ran a hand through his own thinning hair.
“Go fuck yourself, Austin,” The younger snarled.
“‘Ey, babe, c’mon. Honest, I didn’t mean ta upset ya. You just go so fast it can be hard fer us older guys to keep up. I don’t mind it, yer still young, that’s ta be expected, but still,” Austin sighed. “I guess at the end of the day I was teasin’ ya ‘cause ‘m worried if I’ll be able ta keep up wiv ya ‘r not, and I think sometimes if ya’d slow down you could enjoy other things. Scott, ‘m sorry I upset ya- ‘t was supposed ta be in good humor,” And with that, the sniper took off his glasses, intentionally locking eyes with the other.
As was expected, the scout’s cheeks flushed at the action before he huffed and crossed his arms, sulking beneath the cover of his sweaty basebal cap.
“Well it’s not like ya had to tease me over that stuff. ‘Sides, if you guys can’t handle me jus’ tell me ta fuck off. I know how to jack off- ‘s not like I won’t undastand,” the younger man mumbled, grumbling stubbornly before tilting his head up to give the sniper a dirty look.
“Hey there now, we can handle ya, ‘s just you move a lil’ fast fer us sometimes. Listen, I understand where you’re coming from. I was just being a jackass. ‘M sorry about that, babe.”
Scott paused for a moment, seeming to consider the apology, before nodding and offering the sniper a hug.
Austin immediately grinned, enveloping the scout in his arms.
“Thanks, love,” The sniper grinned, pressing a contented kiss to the other’s cheek.
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
“Aaaaaahhhhhh!!!!” The new, freshly traumatized spy screamed, unable to control himself.
The engineer in the room over paused, and went in to check on the other. Finding the spy doubled over on himself, he quickly kneeled to his side, grabbing the sides of his face to force him to look into his eyes, which thankfully helped get rid of some of the screaming.
“It’ll be over soon, hon. You’re doing fine. You’re doing good. Just gotta get out there again. C’mon, you can get up,” The engineer tugged on the newbie’s arm, trying to get the sobbing figure off of the respawn pad.
“Non- non, s’il vous plais, non!” The spy resisted, his whimpers only growing more evident. “J’ai peur- je ne peux pas- s’il vous plais,” he begged, trying to tug his arm back to no avail.
“C’mon now, pardner, you can do it, ya jus’ gotta move past it and get out there again,” The engineer advised, forcibly tugging the frenchman to his feet.
After a few more frantic sobs the spy finally sniffled, coming back to reality. WIping his eyes, he nervously glanced at the engineer. “D
ésolé,” he sniffled.
“You’re fine, c’mon now, we gotta go, no time to waste,” The other commanded, letting go of the spy. He headed forward a bit, before he glanced back. “Try and keep up. It’ll be over soon.”
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
“Bam!” The engineer’s head crashed onto his work desk. Judas flinched, getting up quietly. It must be time for bed. He went over, gently picking up the other, smaller man. Once Dell was secure in his arms he began heading to the other’s room to tuck him in. Jayne noticed the other man, clad in his mask as usual, bringing Dell to his room… as usual. He bit back a sneer, watching how Dell was leaned against Judas’ shoulder so peacefully. “Are you gonna play? It’s your turn, Sergeant Screams-A-Lot,” Kennicky teased, impatient as always, but the nickname won him a snort from Tavish and a few of the other men at the table. “At ease, Strike-Out.” Jayne teased right back, pulling his attention from the pair back to poker. He’d have to figure out how to get more time with the engineer. “Oh, poker? Y’all think you can beat a Texan at that?” Dell laughed, puffing out his chest cockily. Judas narrowed his eyes at the soldier, and he put a hand on his hip. Jayne smirked in response, pleased he was pissing off the pyro. “You hardly get out of your room, maggot! This will be a team building exercise!” Jayne beamed. “You’re trying to tell me that poker is going to be team building…” Dell burst out laughing, slapping his knee. “Oh dear Lord, Jayne.” “Well, I think that I’ll pass on the offer, thank you,” Judas interrupted, enunciating clearly for the soldier’s sake. “If you say so, Maggot!” Jayne responded, a bit pleased (though he tried not to show it). Everyone else but the Texan was scared of the pyro anyways, and it would be nice to see Dell alone. “Aww, c’mon, it’ll be fun, Judas,” Dell tempted. “‘Sides, I gotta show ya how ta play poker.” “It sounds fun, Dell, but I have… some things to arrange anyways.” Besides, there was no way the team would let him keep his mask on. “Ah see, well you just come down an’ join us if ya finish early, ya hear?” Dell grinned. “Sounds like a plan,” Judas smiled under his mask. “I’ll see you there at 18 o’clock sharp, maggot!” Jayne saluted. Dell chuckled, saluting back playfully. “See you there, Hoss.” “Finally! The truckie emerges from his solitary workroom!” Kennicky grinned, making a shitty trumpet noise as Dell joined the rest of the team (spare the pyro, of course). Dell snorted. “Oh hush up now, pipsqueak,” He answered, taking a seat in between the soldier and sniper. He was secretly glad the spy was nowhere near, though of course he was polite enough not to express that. Tavish began filling shot glasses, and Dell raised an eyebrow, looking to Jayne. “What’s all this about?” Hopefully Tavish had the sense that fifteen shots (and counting) of hard liquor in a night would probably kill him. “We are playing Drunk Poker!” “Drunk poker? The hell is-” “Shh-” Tavish cut in. Suddenly Kennicky’s mouth was moving a mile a minute. “So the idea is that every time you lose a round you drink a shot, and the goal is to not get drunk or get everyone else drunk before you.” “This sounds like such an awful idea,” Dell chuckled. He wondered if Tavish or Kennicky had brought the idea up first- it was such a frat boy sounding thing to do. “Ach, ye can’t bump it ‘til you try it,” Tavish cut in with a grin. And the games begun. “I thought you said you were going to show me how to play poker,” Judas teased, hoisting the tiny engineer into his arms. “Ah-” He hiccupped. “It didn’t go as ah had espetted,” He slurred. “I never would have guessed,” Judas chuckled. “Oh you jus’ shut yer trap,” Dell complained, before he broke into a fit of drunken giggles. “Didn’t think you’d be this much of a light weight- how much did you have? 7 shots?” “They were spiked!” Dell argued, before laughing harder. “Calm down, Dell, you’re going to fall out of my arms.” Judas smiled, holding the other closer. “I’m- I’m gonna be fine.” “Not right now you’re not,” Judas responded, amused. “Let’s just get you some water and some sleep.” Jayne watched the pair walk out, trapped in his own drunken haze. He lost again.
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
“I can’t believe it’s snowing out still,” Kennicky huffed, nose pressed to the window.
“Yeah, but for us getting snow in April isn’t all that uncommon,” Jayne answered, leafing through some of his old boyscout packets he was showing the more attentive guys (or the few that pretended to be interested, rather).
“Seriously? That’s a load of bull!” The Scout grumbled, scowling at the white fluff outside the door.
Jayne chuckled, pleased that his parents had left to go get some last minute party supplies. They insisted upon having the whole neighborhood meet his, well, they decided to call it “team”. It just happened to be more socially acceptable than: 8 gay polyamorous lovers, and was less to take in for a small town. Besides, he didn’t really want to jeopardize his parents’ reputation anyways.
“Get used to it, cupcake. This is America’s snow! LAND OF THE BRAVE!” Jayne grinned.
“Ach- my god yer goin’ta scream our ears off!” Tavish huffed, nudging the other man in the shoulder. “Why don’t you just show us your boy scout stuff?” He suggested, hoping to avoid a screaming match between the scout and soldier.
Kennicky huffed at being cut off by Tavish. Next time he’d have to scream out his rebuttal faster. But for now, he guessed he’d watch the snow fall down and wait to
finally
be recognized as a war hero.
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
“N-no wait don’t leave-”“Why shouldn’t we?”“Because he’s on your team, damn it!” The soldier yelled, throwing a pillow at the screen.“Goodness gracious, Jayne,” Josef laughed, leaning back and sipping his beer. Singular. He wasn’t allowed more than one on work days, and honestly the less he drank, the better.“They are a team, Nazi! A team! Teams stick together! At all costs!”“But Jayne, he just betrayed them,” The medic reasoned.“They are a team!” Jayne replied stubbornly. Josef sighed, thinking back on the whole thing. He wished that Jayne had been that stubborn regarding him, but he supposed that he was just more… replaceable. Afterall, there’d always be a new medic. Josef was too old anyways, even though he never thought he showed it. Maybe it was for the better, even if he may never see his old team again.
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
“My head is stuck in the clouds~” Clement sang, trying to restrain laughter. “He begs me to come down- says boy, quit foolin’ around~,” He grinned, picturing the various times Daniel coaxed him out of dreams and planning to “get going” or for his “training”.
“I told him, I love the view from up here- warm sun, and wind in my ear, we’ll watch the world from above,” Daniel contributed, mind wandering to the time he brought Clement rocket jumping. He grinned affectionately. The maggot was terrified!
“As we swing to the rhythm of love~” They sang together, their smiles audible.
“We may only have tonight-” Clement began.
“But ‘til the morning sun you’re mine~” Daniel added.
“A~a~all mine!” They harmonized.
“Play the music low~” Dell cooed, strumming his guitar.
“And swing to the rhythm of love~” Daniel grinned, swaying as he remembered his and Clement’s failed attempts at dancing.
Alex smiled from the doorway, looking at Donnor. “I told you karaoke would be a good idea,” he whispered.
“I didn’t think they’d actually go for it,” The Scotsman retorted.
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
Dell paled, witnessing the words being written on his arm.
‘Don’t worry about me- listen,I gotta go- love you, bye.’
It read in Jayne’s sloppy chicken scratch.
“Oh fuck- fuck fuck fuck!” The Southerner wasn’t known to swear- especially in the office, but right now he wasn’t in the office- at least not mentally.
He scrambled for the phone first, desperately trying to call Jayne’s Skype.
He knew it wouldn’t get to him.
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
Clement had always been the nervous type. He was a do-er, not necessarily a learner, and most of his big accomplishments came from tinkering until
something
happened. So, when requested to speak to young aspiring engineers, he was in over his head.
He took deep breaths, trying to collect himself before he had to go up, while Daniel kneaded his shoulders.
“You
will
do well up there, maggot.” Daniel whispered in his ear, and Clement just knew that he fully believed the words. He was screwed now on more than one level.
“And ladies and gentlemen, may I present to you, the revered Clement Green!” The host announced.
Clement gulped, swallowing nervous bile, and
voluntarily
went on stage.
“That wasn’t so bad!” Alex practically cheered.
Clement barely resisted glaring. “I puked on stage in front of all those people.”
“It was near the end of it at least,” Alex tried to comfort. “You finished it well!”
“At the risk of sounding like a teenager, my life is over,” Clement grumbled in response.
“ “It wasn’t that bad,” Gilbert soothed, wrapping an arm around the nervous engineer. He kissed his forehead.
“Should the doctor kiss the sick man’s head?” Clement sighed wearily.
“You aren’t sick, just nervous, and you need someone.” Gilbert scolded, rubbing the other man’s back.
“If you’re sure....” Clement frowned, wringing his sweaty hands.
“I am.”
“There he is!” Scott’s voice rang over the crowd.
Clement
barely
was able to hold himself together enough to not puke or flee hearing such an almost accusatory way of addressing him, but within seconds the boy crashed into his arms, giving him a tight hug.
Apparently Donnor and Daniel were right behind him too, because seconds later they joined in.
“Good job, maggot!” Daniel beamed.
“For what?”
“Facing your fears and completing the task!”
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
Tavish sprinted down the alley, heart racing. He hopped over trash, dodged the homeless, and took a sharp turn. He hopped over trash, dodged the homeless, and took a sharp turn.And crashed into a tall man, who he was surprised he didn’t run down. The man grabbed him, one arm pinning Tavish against his chest while the other clamped down on his mouth, muffling his startled curses.“Be quiet or you’ll have more to vorry about zhan zhose cops behind you,” He, well, he half purred and half growled the words.Tavish shuddered, a quiet whimper escaping before he silenced himself. What in God’s name was happening here?As the officers scuttled on past- not even so much as looking towards their alleyway, the man holding Tavish smirked. Finally, he managed to catch something to eat- though he had no intentions of draining his food.He picked up Tavish, resisting the urge to bite. “Congratulations on your new rent-free home, courtesy of me,” He whispered, covering Tavish’s eyes.A flick of his cape sent the pair soaring, and Josef noticed the way the man in his arms paled. He’d have to correct that later. “What am I doing here?” Tavish asked, watching the other, very confusing man-like being, seated across from him.“Again, velcome to your new rent-free home. Of course, rent and food is free, but in return I have some rules.” Josef said patiently, keeping a closed-lip smile.“An’ what if I dinnae want tae stay at this rent-free place?” Tavish challenged.“Good question, Mr.?”“DeGroot.”“Good question, Mr. DeGroot. Zhe answer is zhat you do not have a choice in zhe matter,” Josef finished.“And how are you goin’ tae enforce that?”“Very quickly and harshly, Mr. DeGroot. Now, shall I got over zhe rules?”Tavish blinked, thrown off by his answer, but decided to treat the matter as cooly as possible. “Alright then.”“Rule number one, no leaving zhe mansion. Rule number two, zhere vill be no entering of my office, which is labelled. Rule number zhree, you vill remain vell fed and take any medicine I give you. Rule number four, you vill follow and obey any instruction I give you. Rule number five, you vill never attempt to harm me,” Josef stated plainly.Tavish nearly laughed in horror. There was no way in Hell that was innocent, but what were his options right now? He could either accept or tempt the man creature into showing what he meant by delivering his punishments “quickly and harshly”, whatever they happened to be.Although, Tavish could appreciate the “well fed” rule. It was preferable to starving on the streets while he ran anyways, and- even though it was to the sacrifice of his freedom. At least he’d have a reliable roof over his head. He figured now would you be a good time to see the bright sides of life.“Now, as I understand it, you’re in need of dinner,” Josef began. He could smell the alcohol on the other man, and his stomach growls weren’t inaudible. “I’ll join you tonight.”Well, join must’ve been a loose term because the other only watched Tavish eat, and occasionally sipped what appeared to be red wine.“Tell me about yourself, Tavish,” Josef requested, moving past formalities easily on the way there.“Me? Ach, well,” The Scot rubbed the back of his neck, chewing and swallowing what was in his mouth before… “Well, I blow stuff up.” Not anymore- or at least, not in the house , Josef thought. “Oh, really now?”“Yup,” Tavish ended it there.“What else should I know about you?” Josef prodded.“Well, I drink. Best drinker this side o’ London, I’d say- beat everyone twice at Wick’s.” He boasted.Josef scrunched up his face. He didn’t love the taste of alcoholics, and was surprised to see how functional Tavish was for one. But human blood was human blood, and maybe the booze would knock him out cold. If it did, that would certainly make feeding easier. Josef didn’t understand the image of vampires sucking down their blood from the neck. It was far too intimate for him, and oftentimes humans would stir at a large creature looming over them like that. There were plenty of better areas to extract from, anyways.One of his favorites being, of course, the wrist. Near the middle of what Josef assumed would be Tavish’s sleep schedule (he could tell by the snoring), the man crept into Tavish’s room.He knelt down by the bed, carefully and quickly piercing the flesh on his wrist with his fangs. He removed them, and sucked, preparing a bandage and antiseptic to treat it.Once he’d had enough to regain his strength, he pulled away, lapping at a bit of the freshly pooling blood. He poured some antiseptic on the wounds, and placed the bandage on it afterwards, before he rose and left the room.Tavish- and more importantly- his blood, was Josef’s alone.
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
Scout wrapped his arms around his knees, staring at the computer as he talked to his lover from Scotland. “I just can’t wait until we can see each other, y’know?” He asked, a little yawn creeping out of his mouth.
“Aye, I know, lad. I cannae wait tae see you either.” The elder relaxed on his bed, staring at the ceiling as his hand combed through his hair. “But it’ll come soon.” He soothed, looking outside the window. The sky was a gentle purple. “Lad, the sky’s purple here.” “Really?” Scout looked outside his own crummy bedroom window, the smile growing on his face. “It’s purple here, too.” He told the demolition expert, staring out at the sky that connected them after all those miles. He bit back another yawn.
“It is?” Scout could hear the Demoman’s smile.
“Yup, but now it’s turning pink,” Scout commented.
“My sky is turning pink too,” the Demo confessed, staring out his window.
“This is kind of nice,” the younger murmured, watching the sky.
“Innit? It’s like the sky is tryna connect us,” the Scot mused, his thumb tracing the rubber groove of his mouse.
“Well at the rate I cut out some days I think it might be a strong contender over my internet,” the Bostonian joked.
“Or for when I lose power,” the demolitions expert added.
“The sky’s like pink-orange now,” the scout reported. “But the clouds are purple.”
Demoman peered out of his window, a smile growing on his face. “Aye, same here.”
“Really? Wait… are you just pulling my leg? I thought Scotland was always raining!” Scout laughed.
The demoman chuckled, his eyes crinkling in the corners. He took a deep breath. “Well, Scout, once a decade in Scotland, we get something known as a cloudy day. Not sunny, no- that takes millennia, but cloudy. Just cloudy, no rain. It seems we’ve found that day,” Demo grinned at his little “story”, as the Scout guffawed and teased him.
Scout glanced out the window, his face falling a bit. “It’s gray now,” he complained.
“Would it make you feel better if I told you it was gray here too?”
“...I guess,” Scout decided. At least they’d suffer together.
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
Number One
Dell yawned, waking up to the smell of coffee. He got up sleepily, noticing his lover had been replaced with his stuffed bear. He was grateful Jayne didn’t tease him too hard about it when he found out. He set the bear down on the bed, stretching, before he headed to the kitchen.
“Hey there, hon.” He said as warning, before hugging his sweetheart from behind.
“Coffee’s nearly done.” Jayne told him, stretching up to get the mugs. He poured himself a mug full and filled Dell’s up three-fourths of the way, adding creamer and sugar to the last fourth. He personally didn’t understand how the other could like that sugary gunk, but he let Dell worry about Dell. “You wanna let me go so I can give you it?”
“Mm, fine.” Dell smiled, letting go. He took his mug from Jayne’s hands, sipping down some of the warm liquid.
Dell couldn’t help but love a man who prepared coffee for them first thing in the morning. It was exactly what he needed.
Number Two
Dell had always liked holding hands with the man he loved. There was something so very… intimate about it. It was a strange soft spot, but it was still present. Honestly, the quickest way to get his heart to swell with happy warmth was to lean over, take his hands, and squeeze.
Luckily for Dell, Jayne was a tactile man. Most of how he showed his love was through little physical gestures. Wrapping an arm around his waist, kissing his forehead, patting his shoulder, and now, a favorite was hand holding.
Well, after a long day of work the two curled up on the couch, watching some random Westerner that Dell was entranced with, when the other took his hand.
Dell couldn’t help but smile.
The hand was turned over, and Jayne began rubbing his thumb into the palm.
“Jayne?” Dell asked, sighing. It felt nice against his calloused hands that were so often busy pounding metal into more metal.
“Shh,” He soothed, pressing a kiss to his head as he continued.
Dell smiled blissfully, enjoying the massage of sorts. He swore the man knew just how to capture his heart.
Number Three
Dell had an awful habit of staying up. Sure, he was always dead tired when he did- he was by no means a night owl, but he’d always taken pride in his work… and overworked himself. He sighed, looking at the blueprints forlornly. He was
exhausted
, but he wanted to get this in. He had to be two steps ahead of the BLU Engineer if he could, because the bastard got lucky sometimes and skipped steps. Sure, his rival also stalled sometimes, but Dell never knew what type of week it would be.
Jayne, however, was determined to combat this sleep schedule. He walked- no, he
marched
in, shoulders broad but stiff.
“Private! I told you it’s lights out!” His gruff voice commanded.
Dell sulked a little bit. “Jayne, I gotta get this done,” he protested.
“Lights out,” Jayne countered stubbornly, taking the other’s hands and getting rid of the “contraband”. “You’ll work better in the morning after you sleep.”
Dell let the ruler and pencil be taken out of his hands, yawning at the mention of sleep. “I suppose,” He admitted.
“C’mon now, Dell.” Jayne picked him up, getting an embarrassed protest that the Southerner could walk, thank you very much, but he ignored it.
Dell hung onto him with a fake grumble, but cuddled up to him, yawning again. “Thanks, Jayne,” He murmured.
Jayne knew what he needed when he wanted something else, and that was just another reason he loved him.
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
“I cannae believe you dinnae know how to tie a tie, lad,” Tavish teased, confronting his younger counterpart.
“I- it’s not like there’s a tie-tying school!” Kennicky argued.
“What ye’d need a whole school?” Tavish snickered, taking the ends of the clothes in his hands and tying the scout’s tie.
“Oh shut up” He shoved him, getting no response. As much as Kennicky tried to gain muscle, it wasn’t happening.
Tavish couldn’t help but laugh again, patting the other’s chest. “Well I suppose I’ll have to tie your ties then.”
“What? You don’t have to do that- just teach me how!” Kennicky argued.
“Aw, but that’s nae fun, lad.” The Scotsman protested.
“And why not?” Kennicky puffed his cheeks out.
“Because ye’re so cute I want tae keep ye coming back.” Tavish winked devilishly.
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
“Clement?” The young doctor-to-be (and roommate) of Clement’s asked, pausing from his work pouring over textbooks.The engineering student continued his work. Just one more equation and he’d be done with the sheet.“Clement,” Gilbert tried again.“One second,” the other said dismissively, jotting down his work in the margins.The doctor couldn’t help but smile and shook his head. He was always so dedicated to his work… it reminded him a lot of himself.Clement took about twenty more minutes to solve the problem before him, but honestly Gilbert didn’t mind. He’d gone to work with his own stuff in the meantime, and it was just part of their dynamic.“Yeah, Gilbert?” Clement finally asked, pushing away his work so he could pay full attention.Gilbert pushed away his stuff as well, turning to the other. “Vell, me und some of zhe ozher students vere planning to have a study group for mazh und vere vondering if you’d join?” He asked. Clement was the smartest man he was familiar with at math- and his help would be a lifesaver to the group.“I love you.” The Southerner said with a smile.“Huh?” The German’s face heated up. He had been harboring some sweet feelings for the Southerner- but this was just out of the-.“I’d love to, Gilbert,” Clement repeated patiently. Sometimes his roommate's English was less than perfect, but he’d grown used to the quirks. He probably was just having one of those moments.“Oh- uh, yeah,” Gilbert stammered, giving him a nervous smile. “Well just meet us in the commons in our regular spot.” He finished lamely, his mind replaying the words over and over. Did he say that? Or did he think he said that? He glared at his textbook, the other already being reabsorbed in his equations. Well the study session came and went, and it was such a success that not even a week later he was propositioned to ask the “Texan genius” (as the group had called him) back. Gilbert settled at his desk, scribbling ideas for a thesis in his notebook. It took about thirty minutes for the other to finally get home, which was the norm. He usually had an extra class.“Guten tag,” he greeted, looking up from his notebook. “How are you?”“I’m doing a-okay. And yourself?” The shorter reciprocated, setting up things at his own desk.“I’m alright, zhank you. Vell I vas vondering if you’d join us again for-”“I love you.” The other interrupted.“Vhat?” He interrupted, shaking his head.Clement started trembling a bit with nerves. He was kind of hoping that the other wouldn’t notice it, but on the other hand… he wanted to be brave. And he wanted to get this out.“I’d love to join you and the others again, Gilbert… and…” He hesitated.Gilbert stared at the other, transfixed, his heart speeding up. Did he hear right?“I love you- well, I mean,” He stammered, his cheeks heating up. “Listen, ugh, I just- I think we get along pretty well and all, right? And the more and more we hang out the more and more I find myself thinking about you and so I just figured, you know? We don’t have to talk about it- but if you were interested maybe we could get coffee or something?”“I love you.” The German grinned, winking playfully. “Und yes, let’s go on a date.”
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
Judas leaned against the wall, looking at his phone.
‘You there?’ His French friend from Cooking messaged. ‘Have plans for tonight?’ He asked.
He looked down to message. ‘Working again uuugh’ He sent, immediately sending afterwards. ‘You?’ Well, unfortunately the message didn’t fully send, and only the second half did.
The frenchman’s cheeks flushed- but he liked this forward approach. ‘I like where this is going ;)’ He sent flirtatiously.
Judas panicked. Oh crap oh crap oh crap. He stared at the message, his cheeks growing redder. He took a deep breath, taking the confident approach. Maybe this was a small miracle. He felt some kind of spark with the Frenchman, and the fact that they both were still learning English and spoke a romance language was nice. ‘I have work, but afterwards do you want to go get a drink?’ He sent.
‘I’d love to.’
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
“Oi, lass,” The team’s demolitions expert called, stepping into the Scout’s bedroom after two knocks and a second.
Thankfully, the younger had the decency to not try anything to “fun” until after supper. Being kicked in the ass wasn’t very good for her libido, she decided. She looked up from Grand Theft Auto 3.
“What’s up, Donna?” She asked, kicking her feet a bit since she was laying on her stomach.
“I was wonderin’ if ye’d do me a favor,” The other began, a sheepish smile on her face.
Sabrina looked at her curiously, pausing the game. “What kind of favor?” She asked, hesitant to fully commit.
“Well, my back’s been killing me and I dinnae want tae bug the doc with it. She has enough on her hands as it is.” She said quickly, giving a sheepish smile. “So I was wonderin’ if you’d give me a backrub?” She asked.
“Oh? Uh, sure if that’s all you wanted.” The younger said shyly, blushing a bit as her mind wandered.
Donna bit back a laugh at the expression. She was so innocent sometimes. “Thanks, lass.” She said, putting a bag of chips on the floor. She scooted the blankets and rested her head on the pillow. “Uh, so, what do I?” Sabrina asked, getting up. She quirked her mouth to one side, pursing her lips. “Hm…” She barely sat on the couch beside Donna, and began pushing up from her lower back up her spine.
The other sighed, closing her eyes in bliss. “That’s it, lass- you can go a bit harder too, I ain’t delicate.” She chuckled, melting away at the scout’s ministrations.
The other rubbed her back diligently until Donna passed out from the calming bliss. Sabrina looked at her and couldn’t help but chuckle. She looked so happy. She patted her shoulder gently.
“Sleep tight,” She whispered, before going back to her game.
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
“Hey, Snipes,” The Bostonian boy rocked on his heels anxiously, a grin plastered to his face.
The sniper jumped, having a miniature heart attack that was custom with most of Scout’s interactions. “Jeez, mate, you tryna blow me heart out?” He asked.
“If I was I would’ve brought my gun,” Scout laughed. “Anyways, I heard from a little birdie that your birthday is this Friday.”
“Who told you that?” The sniper asked. He didn’t particularly care to broadcast his birthday. He didn’t really understand why it was a big deal, and usually it was a hassle.
“I told you, a little birdie!”
Sniper rolled his eyes.
“Anyways,” the scout continued. “I decided I’d take you out somewhere special on Saturday!”
“Really now?” The elder asked curiously- a bit suspicious.
“Mmhm, so don’t make any plans- not even plans to eat. Yeah… I’ll take you to eat before we get there!”
“And are you going to tell me about your little plan?” He asked the shorter, amused.
“Will you let me drive your van?”
“Number one, she’s my baby.” The sniper said, quirking an eyebrow at the fact that the scout even
asked
. “Number two, I don’t think you’re legally able to.” He finished. So in short, the answer was no.
“Well maybe I’ll ask Engie if I can borrow his truck,” the Bostonian thought out loud.
Sniper rolled his eyes. “Alright then, you keep that a secret.” He chuckled.
The week came and went, and with each passing day the Sniper grew more curious about the plan the other had in store for him. Eventually the day came, and though the sniper was allotted ample time to sleep in (likely because the younger always did on ceasefire days), he woke up early, already anxious to have the mystery revealed.
At about ten in the morning there was a loud knocking on the door. Sniper opened it, and there was a grinning Scout.
“You ready?” He asked eagerly.
“Yeah, been ready for awhile,” Sniper teased, getting an eye roll.
“Let’s go eat first- there’s this great cafe I found on the way-” Scout blabbered, tugging him to the engineer’s truck. He got in the driver’s seat, and Sniper was pretty impressed the truckie allowed it. The marksman slipped in the passenger seat, ignoring the chatter.
They had a relaxed breakfast at a small cafe before heading back on the road. The scout had told the sniper to put his hat brim down so he couldn’t see anything beforehand, and the sniper only entertained him because the scout was so eager and pure in his request. Besides, it was calming. He took a nap on the way there.
“Snipes- Snipes… Snipes!” Scout tugged off his hat, and when the sniper blearily opened his eyes the Bostonian was practically over him.
“Alright, alright, I’m up,” He said, shoving the other back. He blinked at the site before him, a grin tugging on the corners of his mouth. “You brought me to a zoo?” He asked, actually surprised at how happy he was with this birthday gift.
“Yup! Best zoo in the area! It was a bit of a drive, but isn’t it great?” The scout boasted, going over to the sniper’s side and tugging him out of the truck. He closed the door after him and locked it, dragging the other in.
The pair adventured around the area, the grin not leaving the elder’s face for a second. Every so often Sniper would stop by an exhibit and tell the scout random facts about an animal he’d learned from documentaries, wikipedia, or his own experiences.
Scout always listened to the sniper, not so much interested in the animals as in the light in Sniper’s eyes when he described them. They spent most of the day there- even catching lunch at the zoo, before they headed home, chatting about their experiences. It was the best gift Scout had ever given him, Sniper decided, pleased with the day’s events. It was worth the anticipation.
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
Jayne had always been a rough-around-the-edges kind of man. When he did things, they were often loud, confident, and a bit hurried. He had little patience for tom-foolery, and even less, it seemed, for the doctor’s attempts to heal him.
“Jayne,” the medic’s voice pierced the air. He was beginning to grow impatient with the man before him- always fidgeting around, trying to get out of the treatment as quick as he could. Josef knew he had good intentions, he did, it was just a matter of him not realizing that his impatience could hurt him more with this stuff. “Hold still.” He finished, leaving no room for argument in his tone.
Jayne grumbled. “I can lie still when I’m dead, doc.”
Josef rolled his eyes. He could make that happen. He shook his head at himself. As infuriating as the man was, he really shouldn’t send him through respawn due to his own impatience. Besides, the man had saved his tail numerous times on the battlefield, it wouldn’t be a good way to repay him. “You will lie still and let me heal you now, too,” he said curtly.
The soldier grumbled, not showing any sense that he could feel the pain the doctor inflicted, not even at the occasional times when the piece of shrapnel was wedged so far into his skin the doctor had to cut it to get the metal out. He taught himself discipline, and stuck to it throughout the years, figuring that it was a surefire way to get what he wanted in life.
For the most part, it did work. He got in shape, he got this job, he got to fight every day of his life and
live.
However he did not get many friends. Sure, the engineer was welcoming to his gruff efforts, but his diet of discipline didn’t get him much further than that. Besides, the engineer didn’t really count for much. He befriended the
pyro
for Christ’s sake, not to mention the random turrets that Jayne could only assume were his friends. No, a man who could befriend other men, metal, and whatever the hell Pyro was meant nothing.
He guessed if he were to put a pin in it, Jayne was lonely. He was a loud man, a brash man, and perhaps he came on too strong. He had deep seated beliefs that no force on Earth could move, and at times he supposed those beliefs lead him to be intolerant. He, at first, believed that that was good- that it would keep him safe and sound. Now, though, he was wondering if instead it was isolating him amongst his teammates, so many of whom he considered to be “not true” Americans. For example, the medic tending to his wounds right now. He looked at the man hesitantly.
“You did alright out there today, Fritz,” he said, his tone gravelly and uncertain.
Josef looked up at him, not used to the praise. Usually he reserved that for the engineer, or his heads, or his raccoons. “Thanks,” He gave the other a smile. “You’re about good,” he told him.
Jayne grunted, not quite sure where to go with this conversation- he only knew he wanted it to continue. “Are you, uh, going to the poker game tonight?” He asked awkwardly, stumbling across his words. He looked at Josef like he was a landmine ready to explode at any moment.
“I vas thinking about it,” the doctor responded, curious about this new talking development from Jayne. “Vhy?” He asked.
Jayne’s throat tensed up and he could only stare at the other dumbly for a moment, opening his mouth. He licked his lips. “I was just figuring it would be nice. For team building.” He said awkwardly.
“Are you planning to go?” Josef asked curiously, finishing the work on the other. The soldier usually showed up to a game once a month, got pissed off, and left about as soon as he came. He usually started a fight when he was out there too. The medic himself had never personally tried to fight the soldier, but occasionally the heavy would stand as a threat in the doctor’s defense. Jayne was always so… combative. Perhaps he wouldn’t go.
“Uh, yeah… Be there at 20 sharp, maggot!” Jayne ordered, getting a shocked look from the doctor in return. He got up, saluted, and marched out of the area, cheeks burning with embarrassment. He was confused and nervous, but he decided that of all the other people, the doctor is who he should befriend next.
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
When it came to relationships, Clement was no expert. Sure, he had the advantage over some other people when it came to knowing how to take a break. He theoretically had the
time
for them, but that didn’t amount to much to him. The problem with himself, he figured, was that he wasn’t an initiator. He would rather play it safe and live with a lifetime of regrets than venture down the wrong way and have his life end there. Well, not that it would necessarily. That was another problem he found in himself. He had no judgment for risk taking in
any
social situation. It was beginning to become a problem.
He supposed he should’ve abandoned this risk if he was going to be so stagnant anyways. He probably shouldn’t have taken the job, he told himself, getting off the train. There was no turning back now, though. Four years contract at the least and a multitude of assassins to ensure that even if he
did
manage to get away there wouldn’t be a full life ahead of him, were good motivators to stay put. No, not even just stay, he was
trapped
. He stared at the base before him, feeling queasier with each passing second.
Yes, he had been nervous when he’d taken the call. Yes, he had been nervous on the way here. Yes, he was nervous now. He wondered when he
wouldn’t
feel this way, and figured that’s when it would be notable. Then again, in his current state
everything
was important and potentially punishing. He stood out there for a solid five minutes, contemplating exactly how he should approach his team.
Eventually, he decided that he’d go inside and try to find his workshop on his own. He picked up his belongings, which were actually quite sparse. He’d only packed some clothes for after work and some tools that he’d just been so accustomed to he didn’t want to be without them for the job.
He stepped into the base, and the first thing he noticed was the scent of good food. His stomach growled. He considered joining the team, but figured that it would be awkward to go up there with his bags. He hesitated, and the door opened behind him.
“Oi, mind moving, truckie?” The Sniper asked, staring at the shorter man. He was a standard engineer, at least by looks. Short, stocky, strong. The only difference was a fluffy beard, some short hair, and no hardhat or goggles. None of those were completely unusual either though, so really, by first impressions, Austin figured he’d be like the other.
He was wrong. The man jumped, immediately moving to the side. He didn’t make a joke, and he portrayed none of the cockiness or even confidence that the previous engineer had. He was like a doormat. Austin scrunched up his nose. He didn’t like that, not in a teammate. He’d prefer an endless bragger to a man who had no confidence in his ability. Those types tended to bugger up shots or get so in their own heads they were useless.
Austin turned and headed up the stairs to join the others.
Clement shrunk into himself a little bit, feeling like an idiot. He sighed, going upstairs hesitantly. He didn’t go into the kitchen, stalling in the hallway and checking what was each way. There seemed to be a living room to his right, and a hallway full of doors to his left. He tried the hallway. There were no names on the doors, no numbers, and no identifying features of any kind, spare a few bumps, scratches, and… singe marks? He figured that
definitely
wasn’t his door. He frowned, eventually deciding to leave his bags in the hall and get some food. He didn’t want to try and open every door.
He went to the kitchen, pleased to find some homey food. The team must have known he was coming today. They left a smaller portion, but Clement wouldn’t complain. He took the food and turned towards the kitchen.
“Ah, you must be zhe Engineer?” A German man addressed.
Clement gave a timid smile. “Uh, yeah, and you are?”
“Zhe medic,” He said, turning back to his food.
Clement stalled where he was, scanning the crowded table for a place to sit.
Without him realizing, however, a masked man came up to him, grabbing his arm. “Hmmf!” The muffled voice came through, and Clement was relieved to find the tone cheerful. He was dragged back and seated on an outer seat, thankfully beside the kind man.
“Are you not curious about your team?” A well dressed man in a balaclava asked, superiority radiating off of him. He seemed to be an older member, and one who smokes.
“Uh, of course I am,” Clement piped up, feeling like he was in high school again. Everyone here seemed
way
out of his league.
The spy seemed to take pity on him, and threw him a bone. “I’m zhe team’s spy.” He said simply, as if trying to prompt the shy man to speak.
Clement wanted to bury himself in a hole. “Good to meet you,” he said politely, looking around the table.
“Zhe man beside you is the team’s pyro. You two should get along- engineers and pyros do well in battle togezher,” the spy provided, a bit of disgust in his voice.
Clement nodded awkwardly, not sure what he did to deserve the tone. As far as he saw it, he hadn’t done much at all while he was here. Surely that wasn’t cause for ill feelings?
Eventually the rest of the team introduced themselves, the more boisterous members taking it upon themselves to open everybody else up. Clement was mostly quiet the whole time, wanting to figure out how everybody acted before he could talk normally.
After supper the engineer put his dishes in the sink. Most everybody else had cleared out, but the pyro waited by the door for him. He looked at the other curiously, and decided he’d chance a question.
“Do you know where my room is?” He asked.
“Wvvhhvvm? Vhhr bvvdvvm?” The being asked.
Clement furrowed his brow, completely confused. “I, uh, can’t… understand you… there... pardner.” Curse his luck!
The other frowned, figuring that he’d get used to it eventually. The poor guy looked so out of his element though, that Alex decided to take a chance. He lifted up the bottom of his mask, barely revealing his bottom lip. “Workroom or bedroom?” He asked a bit louder, before concealing his face again.
“Uh, would you show me my bedroom first? And, uh, if you wouldn’t mind maybe after I put my bags in my bedroom you could show me my workroom?”
The pyro nodded, noticing the engineer’s bags in the hall when he went to show him his bedroom. He picked one up, allowing the other man to pick his spare bag up, which looked like a toolbag. Interesting. He thought there were plenty of tools here. He opened up the engineer’s door, setting the bag down near the dresser.
Clement looked around the room. It had a small window, a bed, a dresser, and a desk. The floor was concrete, the thin blue carpeting of the halls stopping once it got to his heavy wooden door. It was small, too. Clement figured maybe it wasn’t so bad he chose to pack light.
“I think I’ll bring these tools down to the workroom,” he told the other, who clapped and nodded. He couldn’t help but smile. It was a bit childish, but at least he seemed happy. Maybe the pyro was the only one who was happy here with him… it wouldn’t surprise him. His face fell a little.
The pyro took Clement’s free hand with his gloved one, leading him down two flights of stairs into the basement. There was a locker room to the right, and a hallway to the left. He lead Dell to the third door, and it looked so quaint he wondered if it would be close quarters in here too. The pyro opened the door, revealing a garage-sized workspace. It was a bit cramped due to the sheer mass of scrap metal, tools, drafting supplies, and what seemed to be records of other blueprints available to him. There was even a garage door!
Clement was ecstatic, a wide grin displaying his mood for everyone, well, moreso the pyro, to see.
“Thank ya so much, pardner,” he told the pyro, putting his tools on the long desk. He looked around, stunned by all the stuff. He’d never been so well off equipment-wise. He could use as much metal as he wanted!
After a few minutes the pyro took Clement’s hand again, tugging on it.
“Huh?” Clement looked at the other man, his smile faltering into a confused look.
The pyro simply held his hand, leading him back upstairs to the singed room. He opened the door, leading Clement in before he could assess the area, and closed it.
Clement looked around, finding pictures on the wall, crayons on the floor, and various plushies on the bed.
“Is this your room?” He asked incredulously.
The pyro nodded cheerfully. He sat down and motioned for the engineer to do the same.
Clement furrowed his brow, sitting down across from the mysterious masked man.
Once he was sitting the pyro pulled out two blank sheets of paper, putting one in front of himself and one in front of the engineer. He took a crayon, and pointed to the box, looking at the engineer.
“What’s all this?” Clement asked, confused.
The pyro took another crayon and put it in Clement’s hand.
“Are we drawing?” Clement asked again, a little smile on his face.
The pyro nodded.
“Okay,” Clement replied. As childish as it was- and as out of left-field too, he was kind of glad. He started drawing with his crayon, making a sentry. This was strangely nice.
Afterwards they showed each other their drawings. Pyro’s had him and the engineer holding hands. There were a bunch of unicorns surrounding them, and Clement grinned.
“It’s very nice.” He complimented.
He showed the man his own, and the pyro clapped.
Clement figured he and the pyro would get along just fine.
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
The spy wasn’t used to a lot of affection. He was more of a distanced partner, prone to wooing with beautiful words, a kiss of the hand perhaps, and a nice dinner. Sure, he had gotten intimate, and sex certainly brings you close to the other person, but he never really considered himself to be a hugging type of guy. Thus, the heavy was a change of pace.
The man
loved
hugs. He tried to respect the spy’s space, at first, but the spook noticed how disappointed and sad he was that he couldn’t envelop his lover in a warm hug that he caved. It may have been for the better in some way, Heavy was certainly happy about it, and Spy wondered if that was enough. He supposed it was for now. He liked seeing the other happy.
Things, however, began to grow stagnant. The spy couldn’t help but feel the relationship was beginning to become one-sided affection-wise, and he felt he should do his part. So, after the battle instead of having the larger initiate the hug, Spy did it himself.
He would remember the look of surprised happiness forever.
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
Today was the three year anniversary of Austin’s and Florence’s relationship. They were comfortable with each other’s quirks by now, however Austin still knew that Florence was a romantic at heart. On certain occasions simple gestures like getting flowers or taking him out was to be expected. The only problem was, Austin forgot that today was the day, until, well… today.
He tried booking reservations, failed, and subsequently resigned to flowers and a date at home. Not too hard, he figured. He got a bouquet of red roses, put them in a nice vase, and got to cooking.
Florence texted him in the middle of his cooking fiasco, when he realized he’d burnt it beyond repair.
“Hey, are you picking me up?” The message read.
Austin groaned, scrapping the meal into the trash. It was beyond salvageable. He sighed, a bit ashamed to do so, but he put a frozen pizza in the oven, glad that at least he’d have enough time to pick up Florence and get back before it burned. He climbed in his truck, notifying the other that he was on his way.
When they got back Austin escorted the spy to the table and got him seated before pulling the pizza out of the oven. He cut it, and put the usual amount on each of their places. He set the plate in front of Florence, sitting down.
“Frozen pizza? On our anniversary?” Florence asked, quirking an eyebrow.
Austin cringed a bit at the disappointment in his voice. “I’m sorry, love. Nothing has been workin’ out for me today. I got you flowers though.” He said.
“Why didn’t you just get a reservation?” His lover continued, confused.
“I forgot until today.”
“
What?
”
“I’m sorry,” Austin said guiltily. “I forgot until today.”
Florence took a second to consider. “Alright,” he deflated, sighing.
Austin got an idea. “Why don’t I take you out a week from now. Anywhere you like,” he grinned.
“Really?” Florence asked, perking up a bit. That was sweet of him. He couldn’t help but smile.
“Yeah, I owe it to you, love,” he said, loving the excited look on the other’s face. That date may cost him a fortune, but at least his boyfriend’s happy face was priceless.
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
“You need to sleep,” the heavy murmured, placing a hand on the shoulder of his doctor.
“Zhis isn’t done,” the other protested.
“It can get done later,” he said finally, picking the doctor up. He brought him to his room, wrapping around him in his cuddles. “I love you, doctor.”
The doctor sulked, cuddling up to the other reluctantly. “I love you too,” he whispered, falling asleep shortly after.
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
Florence was used to travelling the world. He was used to Soldier’s brand of xenophobia. He was used to finding his own comforts and creating his own knowledge of his surroundings.
He wasn’t used to having a piece of home so close. The doctor’s voice, in particular, always brought the warmness and nostalgia of home to him. He always cherished their talks, and now, lately, whenever he had the free time to spy on the doctor.
He wouldn’t call it an obsession, necessarily. It was just a little homesickness, perhaps. It was just the enjoyment of a friend’s- or ally’s -he didn’t want to make assumptions he supposed, voice. Surely other people had similar quirks. Besides, he wasn’t
obsessed.
He was a man of dignity- he held himself together. He was never creepy around the doctor, or at least as much as he could tell.
Okay, maybe recording the doctor’s voice was a stretch, but when lonesome nights come where Florence is frozen in bed with fear and sadness, it’s a comfort. He can reach out, and Alsace-Lorraine- his home, is back. He can remember when he was a child. He can pretend he had no responsibilities. He can get swept up in the fantasy.
After just a few short months of listening to the doctor, Florence decided that German accents were definitely attractive. The thick, husky sounding letters were solid and firm and they didn’t wobble or waver or hide like his own French accent. Sure, they could be scathing and intimidating, but that only showed the power behind them. Now, while he listened to his recordings, he could only think about the German man they came from.
Maybe he was a little obsessed. He realized this when he found himself straying from a safer path during work, just to watch the doctor’s back. Maybe he had a bit of a crush, he added shortly after. He stayed in the shadows near the doctor, watching his back when the Heavy could not. Sure, it was less efficient than going his own way and getting to his targets on his own time, but when he saved the doctor from a headshot by the sniper he figured it was worth it.
The doctor didn’t understand why the Frenchman was so interested in his work. He was curious as to whether or not he was
actually
paying attention when he showed him various First Aid procedures. He supposed he didn’t mind, though. The man in question wasn’t bad company, and he’d always liked French accents.
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
“Knives won’t be enough, maggot. Here, take this,” The soldier said gruffly, passing the mysterious Australian a loaded pistol and some extra bullets. Normally he wouldn’t be so welcoming, but their “group” was running low. Besides, the doctor had done an extensive background check for bites, and if he’d survived this long with just a van, he must be able to fight.“Thanks, mate,” the previous assassin nodded. Sometimes he liked to pretend he was still one, that the “zombies” he shot were people. Anything to help the mind in this living Hell was accepted.This wasn’t a traditional zombie apocalypse, the Australian noted. Usually in the rare book or movie he saw about zombies they were humans. However, this apocalypse had been started by wild fauna with a deadly bite. The closest thing scientists had figured was that it was like rabies on steroids where the bastards could survive or even, though rarely, come back, but it had been awhile since anyone had heard from scientists on the radios.Luckily, humans, spare a short period of general incoherency before death, were unlikely to spread the disease. Most infected weren’t violent. They just seemed confused. Groups had even held makeshift funerals for passings of their friends and family. The assassin frowned at the memory of his own friend’s death. He’d been a spy working for the same organization before everything had gone to shit. They’d been stationed near each other, and luckily were able to form their own small group, which was about all Sniper’s van could handle anyways.He never got to bury him. The damned animals- if you could even call them that, had surrounded them too fast so he left the near corpse to sate their hunger. He still felt guilty about that.The new group was good though. Just a single gruff man who seemed to do all the hunting before and a doctor. The doctor was a blessing, especially. The sniper had encouraged the other to hide in his van often. Any skilled hand to heal wounds was precious in this world.“You ready to go?” The soldier asked, looking as though in the few seconds he’d loaded his gun he’d lost all semblance of a personality.“Yeah, mate.” The assassin nodded, and they headed out into the “front”. Over time the trio became closer and closer. The assassin, Lucas, had learned that his hunting partner’s name was Jayne, and the doctor’s name was Josef. He’d learned that before himself there had been another man named Dell, but he’d been bitten while trying to work on a machine to kill the zombies. They both seemed pretty upset about it. Lucas, in turn, told them about Reuben, the spy he’d befriended and fought with. He skipped over telling about his death, his excuse being that he’d rather focus on when he was alive and himself. Neither man questioned it, out here most people had something to scar them, there was no need to force anybody to bring it up.It had been a few months of getting used to the dynamic of each relationship until they began something they justified as a sort of touch therapy. It mainly consisted of holding hands, hugging, or just some general touch. Lucas normally would have never been the type for it, but he realized after having nobody for so long, physical contact was calming. Sure, it wasn’t uncommon for him to skip out on some cuddle sessions by the fire, but with time he’d become much more dependant on the other two. Lucas couldn’t process what happened. He ran for his van, his mind reeling, tears pricking his eyes. He shoved his sleeve against them so they’d stop blurring his vision. He had to be alert- didn’t he? But why? Why did he have to be alert? So he could go back to his van and start all over? So he could live alone again until he was overrun and eaten eventually? He stopped running.There was a bear- the biggest animal they’d ever come across. Luckily, Jayne was right beside him, right? Unluckily, the doctor was there too. His blood froze.“Josef! Get back to the van!” He’d called.“Vhat? Alone?” The medic had replied.“Just run, mag- LUCAS!” The bear lunged at Jayne suddenly. Lucas ran back, unloading a clip onto the bear. It sagged a bit, it’s shoulder clearly crushed.“Josef we’ve got to go!” He headed for the medic just ahead of him who was stunned by shock. “We gotta go we gotta go-” He cursed, grabbing the shoulder of the frozen man.Josef stayed put, his eyes wide, locked to the scene as the bear started devouring screaming Jayne.“Josef, we have to go, now!” He tried to get the man up again.Josef came to his feet with the other’s help, running to the van, but the commotion had gotten the attention of a buck, who had decided they’d be a good snack.Lucas grabbed the doctor’s hand, running and tugging him along, but the man had tripped in a trap they’d dug and Lucas let go.He rushed to grab him, but the buck had gotten their first. The doctor hadn’t even been coherent enough to put up a fight.And then, Lucas ran. Lucas ran to his van until now. He looked at the safety beacon, and considered his options. At this point, did he really want to live through any more of hell? If he did live, would he be the reason more people died? Would he be alone forever?Could he live with himself any more? Could he live with the nightmares- with the memories- with the loss? Would it be worth it?Before he met Jayne and Josef he’d been miserable- days away from ending it already. He’d resolved that he’d have a final meal and end it. Now with his stomach turning he didn’t even want that.As Lucas pondered over his life, his future, and his decision, a wolf stalked closer and closer. It growled and pounced, and Lucas was sent into a painful, but blind existence. Staying out there had been decision enough.
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
Dell didn’t understand why he was prone to sadness. He didn’t understand why he holed himself up and why he submerged himself in work so often.
Now he didn’t understand why he couldn’t work. He stared at the paper blankly, blinking back tears. He sniffled. He was such an idiot. He was inches away from not dealing with himself and he couldn’t do it. He was trapped in his own mind- in his own sadness, in his own fear. He was trapped and he didn’t understand why. It had all come so easily before.
Dell didn’t know how long he sat there. He remembered sparing a glance at the time to find it was 12 a.m.- 2 hours past his regular bedtime. He didn’t feel tired anyways. He stared at his paper, irritable and sad and feeling like a mess. He flinched when he heard Jayne’s morning bugle, realizing only now how exhausted he was. It didn’t matter though. It was too late to fix anything.
Jayne knocked on Dell’s bedroom door, confused by the lack of protest. He pushed it open after a few seconds and found nobody. He headed to the kitchen, found nothing, and then finally went to his workshop.
“Dell?” He asked, banging on the door with his fist.
Dell frowned, shrinking into himself. “Yeah?” He asked, his voice tinny. His heart felt like it was going to crack and break and he didn’t understand
why
. Moreover, he didn’t understand
himself.
He tried blinking back pathetic tears, but they fell onto his paper anyways. He was such an idiot.
Jayne pushed open the door, walking inside to survey the scene. He stood there once his eyes landed on the engineer, staring dumbly. He knew he was in over his head.
“Uh, is something wrong?” He asked awkwardly, fingers twitching with an urge to do something, but he didn’t know what.
“N-No,” Dell said, voice cracking with the stupid pain that had no source. Himself, he provided mentally, only causing more tears to well up.
“Why are you crying?” Jayne asked.
Dell shrugged, sniffling pitifully. He pawed at his eyes.
“Dell, what’s wrong?” Jayne questioned, his heart pounding in his chest and his muscles tense with worry.
Dell tried to give him a reassuring smile, but it cracked and Jayne swore he could see his heart crack with it. Jayne frowned, awkwardly getting on his knees before his tearful colleague. He wrapped his arms around his waist. “Can I help you?” He asked, unsure what to do other than provide
some
physical contact.
“I-I don’t think so. Thanks for trying.” He said, his voice faltering as more tears welled up in his eyes. He felt so broken. He felt so stupid. He didn’t understand why he couldn’t be fixed, and here Jayne was hugging him like he
deserved
any comfort. He choked out another sob.
Jayne gave him a little squeeze, waiting out the crying session. Once it was done he got up. “Stay there,” He mumbled, and headed over to the adjacent desk that Dell used as a sort of expansion. He grabbed some tissues and passed them to Dell, letting him clean up his own face.
“Sorry about that,” Dell mumbled, his voice hoarse. He blew his nose into the tissues.
“It’s fine.” Jayne gave him a little awkward smile, still confused as to what caused it, but at least Dell seemed a little less miserable now.
“...Thanks, Jayne,” Dell said a little louder, his voice hesitant and strained.
“Of course,” Jayne nodded.
Dell yawned, letting himself pick up the shattered pieces of his heart as he wrapped his arms around himself. Within seconds Jayne had pulled him into another hug. It was stiff and awkward, but Dell knew the other man was trying. He took small pride in the fact that he steered his mind away from sadness at that. Someone cared for him, and he was here for him.
Dell let himself relax, a small yawn escaping his lips.
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
Scout was the type of man who
loved
to scare people. Jumpscares, though they were the type he often got the most from, were not his favorite. His favorite method to scare people was the slow build up. That or having the sheer power to crush them without trouble, and them
knowing
it.
That being said, the medic was not the type to be scared, and it
annoyed
Scout. He’d tried everything. He even stalked the man! None of it was fruitful, though, and in fact the stalking had nearly gotten him killed in the middle of the night.
There was only one thing to do. Scout decided that he’d try and get to know the medic. He’d try and find his weak spots- and once he did he’d scare him so bad he’d shit himself!
It had been two months. No luck. However, as disappointed as Scout was, he was enjoying the medic’s company. The man was charming, in his own sort of mad scientist way. Besides, he could play piano, and he had a sense of humor. He even would oblige Scout by playing horror movie music when he walked into the room- which always made the younger laugh.
It was interesting the first time they hung out outside of work. They decided to go and see the latest horror movie together, something they’d both been waiting for. Medic had picked Scout up, arguing that it was better for the Earth to carpool, and they were going to the same place anyways. They talked on the way there about their feelings on the franchise. Scout was pleased to find that Medic had
some
sense, and was smart enough to realize what was actually good. That was a relief.
After the movie they decided to get dinner to talk over it. Scout complained to Medic about the misuse of jumpscares, and they got into their own theories about what made a truly good horror movie. During their discussion they began mashing ideas together, making the epitome of horror as they saw it, and Scout was surprised at just how much he loved it. The doctor was better company than he could hope for. They’d have to hang out again.
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
Lucas didn’t think that he’d hang out with his team when he started. He was a standoffish man, who had no interest in making friend anyways. Afterall, even though he might be staying with the load of these goofballs,
he
was a
professional
.
However, his plans just seemed to float off when the engineer of their team- a seemingly kind man with a load of charisma, decided to introduce himself. He was short- much shorter than Lucas, which was a mixture of endearing and cute. He had a stocky frame, with a bit of pudge as well, which mimicked Lucas’s own pudge except for the fact that there was a bit more.
He seemed to subscribe to the role of a Southern gentleman with Southern hospitality and the likes. Except for keeping Scout and Soldier in line, he was mostly laid back and polite, unless he was completely captured by his own work. That was another thing Lucas liked. The engineer seemed to be a professional as well, and he was a hard worker who would put in numerous hours outside of work to meet whatever goals or deadlines he had.
So, when the engineer sits beside him while waiting for their post-battle check up, Lucas doesn’t mind. The other flashes him his signature smile, nodding his thanks. It’s a warm gesture, full of genuine kindness. Lucas can’t help but smile back. He looks at the other for a moment, and decides to take a risk.
“So, what brings you here?” He asked, chuckling.
“Oh, nothing much,” The engineer grinned, and Lucas is relieved he caught onto the joke. “Just wasting away while I wait for the medic,” He laughed, and Lucas can’t help the warmth that spreads through his chest.
Lucas chuckles as well. “Seems to be a common theme.here,” He smiles, watching the other. He noticed the guitar on the other side of his legs. “Do you always bring your guitar?” He asked.
“Well, I like to be able to pass the time, and most of you don’t mind if I play in here. It’s a good time for me to wind down with music- and it keeps my hands busy,” Dell explained.
“Ah, that makes sense. When’d you learn?” Lucas asked, a bit thrilled that things were going so well.
“I learned as a teenager, for the reason most teenagers learn,” the Southerner chuckled.
“To impress a girl?” Lucas asked.
Dell quirked his lip. “Something like that,” he replied vaguely.
Lucas stared for a moment, trying to piece together what the response meant. He raised his eyebrows once he got the hint, but figured that if Dell was being that vague he wouldn’t want him to say it outright.
They chatted for awhile longer before Dell was called in, and before he left Dell asked Lucas if he’d join the group for poker on Friday night.
“Me?” Lucas replied dumbly. “Uh, are you sure? I haven’t played poker in awhile.”
“Of course, it’ll be fun, promise. It’s mainly just to hang out with the guys anyways. Besides, you should meet more people. The rest of the team are pretty nice anyways,” Dell flashed him that beautiful smile, and left at the doctor’s beckoning.
As soon as he walked in, Lucas didn’t know why he was here. Maybe he’d gotten a bit cocky. He didn’t account for the familiar nerves of meeting with other people- and now, on top of that, betting and playing a game.
Dell waved, patting the spot beside him. “Hey there, Lucas!” He greeted.
Lucas slunk over to him, sitting in the spot Dell had “reserved” for him. “Hey there,
pardner
,” he said playfully, though he was pretty nervous.
Dell laughed. “Glad you could make it,” he grinned.
Lucas remembered why he was here after that.
The game had gone poorly, Lucas wouldn’t lie, but on the flipside of that, he did get to spend time with the engineer, who Lucas had decided, though it was nice he had work ethic, often overworked himself. He’d poked his head into Dell’s office many times, and found the man completely absorbed in something that he’d told Lucas “Sorry, but I really got to get this done,”.
Lucas was normally a shy man. He was normally standoffish and quiet. He was normally professional. However, through spending more and more time with Dell, he’d decided that professionalism could wait. He didn’t often connect with people so well anyways.
The sniper had been thinking about it for awhile now, and decided that this Friday would be the night. So he invited Dell to his camper and little area on the ground in this crowded place. It was outside, and it was really just a little fire pit and a singular chair. Lucas decided that when he would go into town for some stuff to cook over the fire, he’d grab another chair for Dell.
Dell was initially surprised at the offer, but he and Lucas had been getting along swimmingly. He smiled, pleased that the other trusted him enough to invite him, and agreed that that sounded wonderful. He was kind of excited. It sounded like it would be a nice camping-like evening.
When the Southerner arrived, Lucas had set up the stuff for the cook-out. He’d bought another chair, and it sat near him. He couldn’t help but smile to see that Dell had brought his favorite beer, and when he set it between them it was obvious that he was sharing.
Dell smiled at the additional chair. It was a small gesture, but it was symbolic to him. He was happy the sniper was letting him in. He sat down with Lucas to enjoy the night.
The pair settled and ate their food before Lucas had brought Dell up on top of his camper. There was a blanket on top for an attempt to make it a bit more comfortable. Lucas sat down, and Dell joined him.
“Do you know any constellations?” Dell asked, staring at the sky.
“Mmhm,” Lucas nodded, scooting a bit closer to Dell with the prepared excuse that he was just trying to show him the stars.
Both of them had to agree that it was a wonderful night, and though neither of them called it a date, it would have been a pretty good one of those. When the pair separated, both headed to their separate beds and dreamt of possible futures together.
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
“Take zhe poison or not, see if I care,” The spy grumbled to the soldier, taking a drag from his cyanide cigarette.
“You’re a coward,” The soldier spat at the spook.
“A soon-to-be-dead coward, zhough,” The spy provided, shrugging
.
“Pardon me for not wanting to be tortured. Zhough I suppose my brain has more valuable information than yours could ever hold.”
The soldier glared daggers at the man. “I can’t believe you’re taking the coward’s way out.”
“Zhat’s a shame, it should set in pretty soon, zhough.”
“You’re seriously just going to die?”
“Well it’s not like zhere’s any going back,” the spy laughed mirthlessly.
“Can I hold you in my arms and recite my death speech?” The soldier asked, a frown etched onto his features. He didn’t
want
the man to die, but it seemed he wouldn’t be consulted. That being the case, maybe he could take the small comfort. Besides…
maybe
, though it was likely impossible, the spy would respawn.
“Once I’m dead, I’ll ‘ardly be able to stop you, nor will I care,” The spy responded, taking a final drag- the one at the end that mattered. The one where he actually inhaled the cyanide. The man seized up, falling to the ground. He released his bowels and died.
The soldier stared at the scene. It hadn’t gone as he’d planned. He still held the man and recited his speech. Minutes later, he was dragged out and tortured, just as the spy had predicted. It was a slow, agonizing death, but Soldier was proud that he hadn’t given any information. He died with only that.
It turned out there really was no respawn.
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
“Either you do it, or I am going to do it,” the engineer told the scout stubbornly, his eyes narrowed at the dumb kid. It
really
was not that big of a deal.
“Over my dead body you’ll do it!” Scout argued.
Engineer tried to grab the damned kid, and Scout dodged.
“Can’t catch me!”
“What if I told you I have a way to get it out that you won’t feel at all?” The engineer asked, smirking.
“Yeah I won’t feel a splinter coming out
why?”
The scout asked sassily.
The engineer grabbed his hand, getting out a tweezer. “Alright, now look away.”
The scout furrowed his brow nervously, but obeyed.
The engineer casually kicked him in the shin and tugged out the piece of wood.
“Ow! What the fuck!?”
Engineer laughed. “Did you feel it?”
“I felt pain anyways!”
“So you didn’t. I fulfilled my promise.” He smirked.
“You’re an asshole!”
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
Clement wasn’t sure he could commit to this. Which was pretty shitty, because he already had. He stared at the newly attached
gunslinger
as the company had called it. All the engineers had one. If you didn’t, you were quick pickings. Initially, Clement had figured losing an arm was nothing if it would spare him from some of respawn’s shit.
Now, though, as he stared at the metal, he realized just how much giving up an arm really was. Sure- this was an arm, but it wasn’t
his
- well, it was his, but it wasn’t his biological arm. This- this was metal and scary and sure, he was impressed with how well it worked, but that didn’t change the fact that it wasn’t his arm.
On top of that, he realized, was the fact that most people were uncomfortable with it. It made sense, even
he
was unsure and cautious about it, but it was different when you didn’t have to live with it, or commit to the decision. It was different when you could look away and pretend it was normal. Clement didn’t have that luxury, but, all the other engineers covered their gunslingers and so he figured he ought to as well. He wouldn’t pretend to know any of the damned robot arm etiquette.
Clement didn’t think that the learning curve would be this difficult when he got his either.
He always seemed to either grip too tightly, or he’d spasm, or something. It’d been advertised to him to be particularly helpful with getting things into tight spaces- and was
supposed
to help with dexterity, but Clement didn’t think that he was getting
there
anytime soon. Hell, he still held nails too tight in his hand and they’d catapult across the room.
It took months until Clement dared to say he was pretty used to the machine arm. He wouldn’t lie to you and say that now he didn’t ever regret it, but those times hit when it was late and he was alone in his warehouse, free to shed a few tears or sort out his own thoughts and emotions. Then again, everything about this place evoked regret
sometimes
. On the other hand, however, when machines roared and guns blazed and bullets buzzed past him, he was damn grateful for the gunslinger. The ability to crush a skull without effort, though gruesome and scarring, saved his life too many times to count.
Overall, Clement decided that during the living hours- when people were awake and bustling and he shoved away his anxieties and dread, the gunslinger was a blessing. Sure, people were afraid sometimes when they saw the sheer power- even
he
was sometimes, but that meant people stayed away and had at least some fear of you. That wasn’t bad. However, when the others were tucked in their beds and Clement allowed himself to sort and process his own thoughts, emotions, and feelings, he found that the gunslinger- and the company, may be some of his biggest regrets.
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
“Hey! Don’t!” Scout huffed, shoving his boyfriend when he pushed him off the target for the fifteenth time in that gaming session. “You’re such an asshole!”
“But you love me~” the other grinned, pressing a few kisses to the scout’s cheek.
“Yeah, well only because I
have
to!”
“You don’t
have
to!”
“Shut up. Even if I don’t have to you’ll make me.” He grumbled, though his cheeks were warm.
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
“Stare at me how you want. It won’t change anything,” Josef said, steely in the presence of the engineer, but his heart was thudding through his chest.
Jayne. Jayne had tried to leave and he had tried to leave with
this man
. This short, short… gay… He really didn’t know Dell too well. He chided himself mentally at not being able to come up with a good insult, but at least the look of a man steadily losing hope was there to comfort him. Besides, if the man had ended up here for suspicions of being gay, well, Jayne wouldn’t be safe with him.
“Where is Jayne?” Dell asked, meek. The bastard knew he was toeing the line. Then again, Dell, from what Josef knew, was smart. He’d even initially tried to make a bond with the man. Impress him, treat him like a human. That ended, however, as soon as he brought out the fire hose.
He hadn’t exactly
wanted
to, but it’s not like the state wasn’t constantly up his ass about procedures for patients. Apparently this was Vermont’s version of dealing with the gays.
It didn’t really matter to him anyways, at least, not initially. This whole operation, this whole asylum- it was just for cash. Just so he’d be able to further his knowledge- so he could continuing developing what would be the greatest thing to happen to modern medicine. Well, the three greatest things- and a gun to use it on the battlefield- or even on the go, he supposed. It was intended for the battlefield, though.
They were currently dubbed substance A, substance B, and substance C. The most impressive of the three was the last- it could regrow lost or damaged tissue, leaving it as good as new. This, however, had created another problem. Making these substances took a
lot
of blood. His own blood, to be specific. After a session of “donating” he was often left weak and mentally impaired, which was no good for the asylum… or this current situation.
“You’ll never see him again,” he told Dell, and he’d do his best to make sure that was true. This, he figured, was just covering Jayne’s back. He was protecting him. He was a rash man, and could be blind to danger. Dell was no good for him. Besides, at the best of times he was a bit unstable. Josef had been secretly watching that as well, and it was one of the few reasons he didn’t regret getting into psychology.
Dell shot daggers at him, but looked away, childishly ignoring him. Josef nearly rolled his eyes.
“You should get sleep, Mr. Conagher,” he advised, and it was true. Sure, he wanted the Texan out of his hair, but he’d gone through a bit of a
shock
earlier today as well. He, again, chastised his brain. That was an awful pun.
In all seriousness, though, he’d been moving quite quickly for a patient post-shock therapy. As much as he hated Dell in this moment- hated his selfishness and whatever the hell had charmed Jayne to try and get him to revolt against his best friend, he was a patient. An interesting one as well. One who was actually
smart
, and that was so rare to come by. Besides, another round with the hose would probably give Josef enough sadistic joy, and from that he may even lose a bit of his anger.
Dell looked at him from the bed, his hands in his lap. He looked around the room, silent, but Josef could see him taking in his surroundings. Just like the first day. Dell had self-reported some anxiety, and Josef could only guess that this was a by-product. It didn’t put Josef’s nerves at ease, though.
Eventually the man went back to sleep. Josef stayed to watch him. Someone needed to, but the Texan stirred at one of his assistants entering the room. The shorter blinked, noticing the new girl, who Josef could only guess he’d recognize from the recent “therapy”.
Josef got up, nodding to the girl. “I’m going to need you to watch him.”
The girl opened her mouth to protest.
Josef gave her a pointed look. “I have other business to attend to,” he said. It was true. He didn’t have time to play babysitter all day. He had an asylum to run, and after that, in his free time, his experiments to do. He left the room.
That was when it all went to shit.
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
“You left me when I needed you most. And now, I am leaving you.” Dell glowered at Judas, his heart cold and numb. Tears had already fallen down his face, and now they only left dry trails.
“Dell, please-” Judas pleaded, nerves skyrocketing.
The shorter man sniffled, turning his back.
“Why now?” Judas asked. “Does this make you feel good? Evening the score just so you could play get-backs?” He taunted, knowing full well how shitty that would make Dell feel. Maybe if he could get the engineer to regret it enough- he’d give in.
Dell cringed in on himself, the tears from before welling up again. “Y-you know I’m not like that. I-I just. I can’t keep sticking my neck out for you if you’re going to endanger me like this. I’m not going to get killed for you,” he answered, his voice trembling.
Judas contemplated the words, his stomach twisting. “Why now?”
Dell paused, wiping at his eyes. “Are you sure you want to know?” He asked, voice hoarse with pain.
“Tell me.”
Dell pressed his lips together, furrowing his brow. He hugged himself, before turning to the side so Judas could hear better. “Because now I have someone else to watch my back. I have someone who cares about me and wants me who won’t just use me, Judas. I have someone who wants me to be safe- and he-” Dell’s voice started to falter, emotion gripping him again. “He wants me to be happy, too,” he finished, wiping at his eyes again.
Judas could feel himself shutting down. He could feel his heart closing up in hopes to stop more pain from seeping in- in hopes to shut out his mistakes and regrets. In hopes to preserve him. It wasn’t working.
“I wanted- no, I
want
you to be happy,” Judas said softly.
Dell let out a whimper, and Judas’s heart shattered even further, his walls crumbling at the sound.
“If you want me to be happy, Judas-”
“Dell please-” he tried to interrupt, in vain.
“Then I need to be away from you. I- I can’t deal with this any more,” the Southerner choked out, starting to cry.
“I never knew you were unhappy-” Judas said, his brows knit together as though he were trying to solve the world’s problems. In a way, he was. He was trying to solve
his
world’s problems.
“You didn’t pay attention, then,” Dell said, turning. He paused. “W-we’re better off apart, Judas… You’ll find someone again, though,” he murmured, ducking his head. It wasn’t fair he felt the need to protect the man who’d hurt him- who’d neglected him- who’d endangered him with his bullshit, but Dell was never good at playing a cold hearted man. He got attached. So instead, he left the room, trying to contain a wail of pain that was bubbling up in his chest.
Judas watched Dell-
his
Dell- the man he’d invested years on and considered his soulmate- the man he loved so dearly but didn’t think about- the man who left him- he watched Dell go. He watched the man he’d bonded with for so long he didn’t ever imagine a world without him- he watched that man chase a brighter future. He bit back tears at the fact that it would be brighter without him.
He didn’t know how long he stared at the direction Dell had left. He didn’t want to know. He wanted to fix this. He knew it would never happen. So, he stared at the hallway with the look of a man who’d sucked all the passion out of himself to protect a suffering heart. It was the last look of Dell he’d ever had.
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
Scott paced in his room, his heart thudding in his chest. He was a coward- he knew it. He could tell because he couldn’t even handle telling his crush the truth to his face. It was just that, being a freshman, asking out a senior seemed- well, it seemed impossible.
His mind played through all the possibilities of what would happen as his feet tapped against the hardwood floors.
“You and me? That’s hysterical.” The Scottish exchange student cackled in his face.
Scott flinched.
“You seriously think I would go for some twig like you?” The voice rang in his head after that.
He ran his hands through his hair, whimpering quietly to himself in distress.
Scott jumped at the sound of his phone receiving a text.
‘hey scott, u there?’ Donnor had typed.
Scott froze, staring at it. ‘yeah whats up’ He sent back as quick as he could.
Donnor smirked, his cheeks warm. Honestly, being a senior and all, he figured after this exchange program he’d stay in America. Well, that is, if everything went the way he wanted it to. ‘need someone to help me finish cod- can i pick u up?’
‘yeah i dont have plans- txt me when your here’ He paced in his room quicker, his heart thudding in his ears. He stopped dead in his tracks and checked his outfit. It was too simple. Besides, it was supposed to get cold later tonight. Scott looked in his closet and shoved on a blue flannel that was wearing at the wrists and elbows. He personally thought it made him look cooler.
Donnor parked outside Scott’s house in his driveway, shooting the younger a text. ‘outside’ it read.
Scott flung himself out the door, locking it behind him. He practically skipped over to the car, opening the passenger side door. He slipped in. “Hey there, Donnor,” he grinned wide.
Donnor swore that smile should win awards or something. “Hey, you.” He poked Scott’s shoulder, noticing the blue flannel. “Ye ready tae go?” He asked, admiring the outfit. It was simple, but a bit rugged and cute in the ‘Scott always tries too hard to be cool’ sort of way.
“Heck yeah!” The freshman beamed.
Donnor chuckled, pulling out of the driveway to head to his place.
“So is Isaiah not home?” Scott asked, scrunching up his nose. He didn’t really like the kid. Seemed a bit snotty to him.
“Yeah, he went tae American football practice,” Donnor reported.
Scott snorted at that. American football. “Y’know here you can just call it football,” he said.
“Ach, yes, I could say that if I wanted to be wrong,” Donnor retorted playfully.
Scott laughed, punching Donnor’s shoulder.
“By the way, lad,” the older addressed, a little smirk on his face. “I couldnae help but notice a little note in my locker today?”
Scott’s heart sped up. “Huh, really?” He played stupid.
“Mmhm,” the elder nodded. “Happened tae have yer handwriting too,” he continued.
Scott’s cheeks warmed. Crap crap crap- it was supposed to be anonymous! Damn his luck! “You sure? There’s probably lots of people with that sorta handwriting.”
Donnor smirked. “Maybe, but Isaiah saw ye drop it in,” Donnor’s grin was pure evil.
Scott pressed his lips together, gripping the side door. Fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck!!! “Oh, really?” He asked, his voice cracking. His cheeks grew warmer with shame.
“I was thinking, lad,” Donnor smirked, ignoring the voice crack. It happened to the best of people. “That maybe instead of passing love notes, we could go on a date?”
Scott froze, staring at the other man in hopeful disbelief. He pinched himself, and then pinched himself again for good measure. “You think?” He asked, his voice soft and timid.
“I’d love to if ye’d join me for it.”
Scott couldn’t help but grin. “Shit, I’m in.” He said, happiness radiating off of him.
Donnor swore he could feel Scott’s happy glow, and his smile was infectious. “Great- how does Saturday sound?”
“This Saturday?” Scott asked hopefully.
“Mmhm.”
“That sounds fan-fucking-tastic!”
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
“Dell?” Tavish asked, cracking open the door. He looked at the other man, pressing his lips together in concern. He’d holed himself up in his room, and some suspicious sniffles had escaped. Not that everybody didn’t already know what they were.
The smaller man jumped, quickly turning his chair away. Tavish could see him pawing at his eyes. “Go away,” he said weakly.
“What’s going on?” The demolitions expert ignored that, closing the door behind him.
“Nothing,” the other responded unhelpfully. Tavish pulled up a stray chair, sitting beside him.
Dell tried to swivel his chair away again, but Tavish’s strong hold prevented it.
“What’s going on, Dell?” He asked again, softer.
“I don’t want to talk about it,” Dell sniffled, wiping at his eyes.
“Why not?”
“Because it’s stupid,” he said, his voice cracking with pain.
Tavish swore he felt his heart crack too. “If it’s this upsetting tae such a smart man, it cannae be stupid,” he soothed, rubbing small circles on the other’s upper back.
“I-I’m not smart- not right now. I’m a fucking idiot,” He sniffled, wiping at his eyes.
Tavish scooted closer, wrapping an arm around the engineer. “You
aren’t
. Now what’s going on with you?”
The engineer curled in on himself, pawing at his eyes. “It’s embarrassing.”
“I willnae tell anyone else.”
“But
you’ll
know.”
“I’d never make fun of you, Dell. I really do care. What’s going on?” He asked softly.
“I-it’s just… I nev-er- I never told you guys why I came, right? O-or why I stay around?”
Tavish hummed softly in acknowledgment, rubbing his thumb over the sleeve of the other’s t-shirt.
“W-well… truth is- I don’t have nowhere else to go. I- I ain’t a normal man- I ain’t even a good man. I’m flawed beyond God’s love and I ain’t,” he seemed to crumble, sniffling. “I ain’t got a family no more- and I ain’t got a home, either.”
Tavish held the other closer, frowning. “Dell, ye’re a good man. We all make mistakes- God would still love ye.”
“Tavish-” Dell said, and it sounded just so defeated.
Tavish gave him a little squeeze.
“I-I’m
gay
.”
Tavish furrowed his brow, biting back laughter. Is that all that was wrong? “And?” He asked.
Dell blinked, utterly confused as to why the other didn’t recoil like he’d told him he was poison to touch. He hesitantly looked at the other man. “And that ain’t right- it ain’t normal- and… and that’s why I ain’t got a home or a family or nowhere to go to.”
Tavish frowned, the reality sitting back in. He turned Dell to face him, giving him a proper hug. “That’s fucked, lad. Ye dinnae deserve that,” he murmured.
“But I’m
gay
, Tavish!” Dell argued.
“You’re still a human- and a good one at that. Besides, I dinnae think you’re as alone as ye think ye are,” he said, rubbing the other’s back.
“You… you don’t think I’m bad?” Dell asked- hesitant and fearful- as though Tavish would pull a rug out from under him and he’d just fall to his death right there.
“I told ye I think ye’re a good man- how many times do I have tae say it?” Tavish laughed softly.
Dell wrapped his arms around Tavish gently. “Thank you,” he said softly.
“This doesnae deserve thanks, lad,” he returned, holding the other and listening to his quick heartbeat.
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
Clement was
livid
. And more than sadistic. It had been two days since the spy’s fuck-up, and he’d confiscated all of the wine, cigarettes, and had even removed the spy’s door. However, it wasn’t working. So, now more drastic measures had to be taken. He’d punish the team.
He marched into the lounge and took all of the liquor, casually going to his workshop and setting up a few sentries to guard it. The spy was
going
to crack and apologize soon, or it would get worse.
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
“This, us- Jayne, we were cursed from the beginning,” Tavish said, his eyes wide with horror.
“Maggot! Don’t you think like that!” Jayne argued, heaving on the ground. He leaned to the other side, vomiting up more blood.
Tavish rubbed his back, concern written on his face as clear as day.
“This wouldn’t have happened if we weren’t together,” the demolitions expert murmured.
“I’m gonna be fine,” Jayne said, his breaths labored. He put a bloodied hand against Tavish’s own, which were trying to compress and stop the blood from a bullet.
“Respawn isn’t on, Jayne,” Tavish argued, and his eye started to well up with tears.
Jayne pressed his lips together. “It’s just a bullet hole.”
“Just a bullet hole will kill you!”
“We’ll go back to the medic.” Jayne said, wiping the other’s eye. He hated to see the other cry.
“Can you hold your hand against this while I carry you?” Tavish asked.
“Of course,” He nodded, and Tavish’s bloody hands were replaced with his own.
Tavish hooked his arms under Jayne and lifted. He staggered back to the base, cursing them for going out so far into the battlefield.
Jayne’s breathing grew more labored with time, and his face scrunched up, failing to mask his pain. Tavish couldn’t help the guilt that settled low in his gut as he watched his love battle the pain.
Tavish kicked at the Medic’s door so hard he felt he’d break his toe.
“Coming!” The doctor called, opening the door a few seconds later. He saw Jayne, and his eyes widened. “What happened?”
“Shot- doc, is he gonna be okay?”
“Get him on the table,” the medic ordered. Once the soldier was settled Medic shooed the demoman out, though it wasn’t enforced by anything but words- his hands were too occupied keeping his idiot teammate alive
again
.
Tavish obediently went outside, pacing just outside the door while he waited.
It took about an hour, but Jayne was okay.
They’d still have to talk about this cursed idea, and Jayne knew it. Tavish was a superstitious man and was deeply fearful over anything to deal with curses or bad luck. However, as he lay against the hospital bed, barely keeping his swimming thoughts organized and his body awake, he figured he could recover before that bag of worms was opened.
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
“You can’t put a dead man in jail,” the spy said cooly.
The sniper glared. “Oh that’s real cute, ya cunt,” he spat.
“It’s true,” the other shrugged passively.
“So you don’t have a plan, even?” Lucas asked incredulously.
Reuben raised an eyebrow. “Well, I did before zhe timing was all fucked up, Lucas,” he said pointedly, narrowing his eyes at the memory of the other failing to secure the entrance and wasting time
Lucas glared daggers for that. “Some spook you are,” he grumbled, looking around. He could hear the cops approaching.
“Would you like a cyanide cigarette?” The spy offered.
“Shut the fuck up, mate. I’m thinking,” Lucas responded bitterly.
The spy shrugged, hearing the police just outside the barricaded door. He pulled his out, taking a drag.
The door was busted in and Lucas cursed.
“Why aren’t you freaking out?” He asked the spy.
“I’m a spy,” the other said simply. “We’re trained to be ready for torture and death. We’d be useless if we weren’t,” he shrugged.
Lucas looked at him as though he were crazy, and the other took another drag of his cigarette.
“Pass me a smoke,” he said reluctantly, and Reuben did so.
Lucas lit up as the police broke down their barricade.
They both were shot before the cyanide mattered.
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
People are puppets held together with string
Or at least that’s what Reuben thought. Humans were all held together, woven by our connections. Through this interconnectedness we were supported in this world and encouraged to live. This changed, though, when people were taken out of their original home and say, moved to America.
There’s a beautiful sadness that runs through him
Since the relocation he’d always felt so alone. Like his strings were frail and frayed- and that one tug would break them all. So he walked on eggshells, fearful and alone. He was careful to never lean too hard against anyone for fear that they’d disappear and he’d be more isolated than he currently was.This loneliness and cautiousness just isolated him. He began feeling separate from entire groups- like he was flawed and couldn’t connect. He felt like he was a mistake, and his thoughts spiraled downwards, observing the others he viewed as so happy.He started with eavesdropping. Catching gossip and conversation snippets. He had always hoped he’d hear something about himself so he’d know if he were right, but he quickly found he hadn’t even made that much of an impact in the world. As time went on, he cultivated this sort of invisibility, easily sneaking around others for snippets of information. Eventually, he wanted to challenge himself and push his newfound talents to a limit.He decided he would start shoplifting. Something casual- an easy beginning to a life of crime. The worst that would happen is that they’d catch him, and then what? He got thrown in jail? He wasn’t doing anything important out of jail. At least they’d notice him. And if he succeeded he’d be a bit richer.He stopped by different joints, easily slipping out every time. It was almost disheartening. Nobody noticed, still. He wondered sometimes if he were invisible, and couldn’t help but sneer at conversations about superpowers where anyone would want to be. Sure, you could get stuff, but at what cost?He continued his life of crime, adding on pickpocketing as well and getting sloppier each time, until he was grabbed by the wrist by a candy store employee. The nametag said Mick, but he only spared it a glance.“What are you doing?” The other asked, harsh in their words.Reuben couldn’t help the excited shiver go up his spine. Someone had noticed him. Sure, he was mad, but he didn’t care. “Can I ‘elp you?” He asked, playing dumb.The employee furrowed his brow. “You didn’t pay for those,” he explained.“What?” He asked, confused.Mick pointed to the candy bars in his pocket.Reuben shook his head, laughing at himself. “I’m sorry, Mick, I must’ve forgot,” he explained, questioning himself. Why was he doing this? Why didn’t he just confess? The other teenager bought it, and gave him a little look of relief. “I’ll ring you up now then,” the other smiled.Reuben joined him at the counter. “Zhis question may be a bit weird, but do you happen to go to Thomas Jefferson High School?” He asked, his heart pounding in his chest.“Oh- yeah, I just moved here. You an exchange student?”“I… moved here recently as well,” Reuben said, wondering how recent 8 years, half of his life, could really be seen as, but it’s not like the other would know.Mick rang him up, nodding. “Well maybe you should introduce me to some people- unless you’re above that and all,” the teenager laughed.“Uh,” Reuben felt his cheeks heat up with shame. “I don’t know very many people.”“Oh, really? Well, maybe we could have lunch together?” Mick offered.Reuben blinked, a bit shocked. “Yeah-” he said a bit too excitedly. “If you want,” he added, embarrassed with himself.“I’d love to, mate. It’d be good havin’ another pal and all.”“Uh, yeah…” Reuben paid, and Mick passed him the candy bars he didn’t really even want in the first place. “I’ll see you at school, then,” he gave an awkward smile.“See ya,” Mick nodded.
As he asked me to pray to the God he doesn’t believe in
Mick looked at Reuben. “Is that true, mate?” he asked, his heart speeding up, but he felt crushed.Reuben shrunk in on himself, furrowing his brow. He didn’t understand why he agreed to this game. Nor did he understand why Mick would ask him what he thought his biggest weakness was.“Um,” he stalled, casting his eyes down, his own heart thudding in his chest as his stomach did cartwheels. He felt nauseous. “I-I mean, it’s not zhat big of a deal,” he said lamely.“Reuben- jail is awful . It’s nothing to be messing with,” he said. “You’d be stuck there having to do things against your will all the time. Why the hell are you stealing shit?”Because it gave him a rush. Because he didn’t have any plans. Because he had at least one talent. Because he couldn’t empathize with people who isolated him. Because… because he didn’t care about himself.“I don’t know,” he shrugged.“Mate, don’t play dumb,” Mick said distastefully.Reuben rubbed his thumb against the inside of his palm, itching for a smoke- another habit he’d picked up from his stealing. “It’s just… I can’t describe it.”Mick sighed, pressing his lips together. “Can you promise me you won’t?”Reuben nearly laughed at that. Sure he could promise. He wouldn’t keep it though. “If it’ll make you feel better.”“Reuben, that’s bullshit.”“Why don’t you pray for me zhen?” He suggested. He never really subscribed to a higher power, and Mick knew it. He was always awkward when asked to pray, and he figured with all the horrors in the past there couldn’t be a god. He figured with how slighted he was there couldn’t be a god- unless he was some kind of sadist. If that was the case, he didn’t deserve praise. He had his string theory anyways. However, if there was one- the one Mick prayed to- then maybe a prayer would help his life. Maybe he’d find some dumb meaning for this shit.
Time and again boys are raised to be men
Impatient they start, fearful they end
But here was a man, mourning tomorrow
Reuben and Mick were months away from graduating, and he was itching to be out in the real world. He didn’t know what he’d do, but right now the plan was for him and Mick to move in together and work until he figured it out.It had been weird, getting his first job. He hadn’t been used to working for a wage, but Mick had looked so proud once he’d started his shifts with him. He said that he was going on a road to be an honest man again. Reuben wondered if it really worked like that. If a dishonest man could turn honest and the world would forget.Either way, Reuben couldn’t help but feel like Mick’s prayer worked. On his third day at work, a beautiful girl who looked about his age walked in. She grabbed some lollipops and all that, and gave him the brightest grin when he began ringing her up. He asked standard questions at first- and she gradually transferred that to standard smalltalk. He wasn’t sure how to treat this whole situation, but there were no other customers, and he didn’t want to shove her out. Besides, Mick was giving him approving looks (and maybe a few winks).“Well, Reuben ,” she practically purred as the conversation came to a close.He felt his cheeks warm up with how she said it. “Uh, yeah?”“You got some paper and a pencil?” She asked, a mischievous smirk on her face.“Uh, yeah,” he got both out, passing it over curiously.She scribbled something down, passing it back to him. He recognized it as a telephone number instantly. “Call me,” she gave him that heart melting grin again, winking before she left.Reuben would have stalled a few days to think it over, but as soon as his shift ended (7 p.m.) Mick practically forced him to call her.“Uh, ‘ey there, it’s Reuben,” he said, and was somehow locked into a four hour call. A four hour call that he was paid attention to in. That he was appreciated. And maybe, that he was flirted in.Mick was a bit taken aback at how fast the two moved. They graduated, and as soon as they were out he moved in with this girl of his. He would’ve protested, but Reuben had assured him multiple times that he’d be careful, so he was left to deal with his own disappointment.The Australian hadn’t been to worried, though. Seeing as their relationship progressed he quickly realized how much happier Reuben was. They both still hung out a lot too, and she seemed to encourage all of the good habits Reuben had- as well as his job, which was a blessing. Thus, Mick had begun trusting this new girl, and had thought that this relationship may just be the perfect thing for Reuben right now.Needless to say, he didn’t expect a phone call from Reuben at 1 a.m.“You gotta ‘elp me, Mick,” the other man whispered over the phone.“Reuben? What the hell are we doing awake?” Mick asked blearily.“I’ll tell you what we’re doing awake. Roxanne is pregnant,” he said, an air of horrified stillness to it.“What?” Mick asked, completely taken aback.“What do I do? She’s pregnant, Mick. I can’t be a fazher- I’m not- I’m not the right kind of person! I can’t support them! I can’t-” Panic caught hold of his voice.“Reuben, calm down. It’ll be alright. We’ll talk tomorrow,” he soothed, way too tired to even process this.They eventually talked it out, and Mick had promised that he’d figure it out as he went. Besides, Mick would always be there to help. Reuben felt a bit guilty and unsure about that. He didn’t want this string to fray. He didn’t want to lose Mick.“Mick,” he said softly, near the end of the conversation. “I’m scared.” he said softly.Mick’s hand was over his, giving it a squeeze. “I know you are, but now you’re both in this together. It’ll be alright. Promise,” he gave Reuben a reassuring smile.Reuben gave him a nervous one back, cursing himself. He couldn’t think of anything he regretted more right now.
He drank, but suddenly drown in his sorrow
“Mate, this isn’t good for you,” Mick murmured, rubbing the other’s upper back.Reuben sniffled, hot tears welling up in his eyes. “It-” It didn’t feel good. But… “it ‘elps me,” he murmured.“No,” Mick reached for the vodka, and Reuben snatched it away, taking another gulp.“ Reuben ,” this was childish, and Mick’s tone screamed that.Reuben sniffled, the tears starting to fall. He shoved the drink away, giving up. “Mick- I can’t do zhis. I can’t do any of zhis. I’m- I’m a failure. I can’t do zhis,” he whimpered, starting to sob.Mick stared, feeling as though the entire world had shifted on him. He set the vodka out of Reuben’s reach, crouching in front of him. “Hey, Reuben,” he said in a soothing voice, trying to ground the other.Reuben just choked out another sob.Mick couldn’t help but feel his heart twinge in pain. “It’s alright, mate. I told you, I’m here. She’s here. You’re not alone.”Reuben cried harder at the mention of alone. He felt so alone. He felt alone right now- even though he was surrounded with people he loved and who loved him and he couldn’t help but feel guilty for feeling that way. “I- I don’t want to do zhis. I- I feel so trapped. I can’t escape, Mick.”Neither of them realized the irony of the statement at the time. He could not break surface tension .He started arguing with Roxanne every day, his alcohol and smoking often being the main things she’d go off at him for. He’d always go off at her for just getting pregnant. He couldn’t help being illogical- it was the sole thing that separated him from his old life, his old happiness, and his old security. She couldn’t help the guilt that washed over her every time he said that and most of the time she ended up crying. One could flip a coin to see whether Reuben would comfort her.Eventually, Reuben decided he had to run. There was no going into this life. He couldn’t . He looked in the wrong place for redemption . He wasn’t exactly sure he remembered how he got this job. He was told he was going to be a spy for Fortress Inc. Though he’d been seen by two people, he quickly remembered how he had been invisible before. Orientation was coming soon, and they told him to be rested up and well fed.He didn’t think he’d change that much after it, though. When he looked at the new man in the mirror in his pocket, practically chain smoking cigarettes as he headed on his next morally reprehensible mission, he was disgusted with himself. He’d lost all of that honest living crap, and he lost all of his self preservation- aside from getting the information.Then again, it was easier to have one sole purpose for life. It was easier to just do what someone else told you and then turn off for the rest of the day, smoking and drinking until he was too stupid to think.
And don’t look at me with those eyes
I tried to unheave the ties
Turn back the time that drew him
Mick looked at Roxanne with a loss of words, her blue eyes glittering with tears.“I’m sorry,” he said dumbly, his heart sinking. Again, he felt a sense of being restricted from her. Afterall, she had more of a reason to cry, even though he’d left both without a trace.“Mick- I-I’m serious,” she stuttered. “Where is he?”“I don’t know, listen- he was real worried about this whole thing.”A few tears fell from her cheeks, and she curled into herself, sniffling pitifully.“Roxanne… I swear I tried to help him- I know you did too, but…” Mick furrowed his brow, concern in his voice. “I think he ran.”She let out a broken sob. “I-I thought I could trust him,” she said.Mick felt his heart wrench at that, but he also felt a rage in the pit of his stomach. As he saw it Reuben had just fled thinking that that’d be best for her. Besides, the man was obviously panicking. Sure, he should’ve forced himself to stay, but Mick wasn’t even confident that Reuben knew what was going on and wasn’t having some sort of mental break down.“He didn’t do it to hurt you, I know that,” he said finally.“Well he did a shit job,” She sniffled. “Oh god, I’m going to be a single mom- and at this age. Mick,” she started sobbing, pressing against his chest.Mick awkwardly held her, rubbing her back, doing the job that Reuben should’ve done.
But he couldn’t be saved. A sadness runs through him.
Reuben paced in his room, staring at his old phone with enough regret to sear his soul. He went over to it, hesitating. He unlocked it, staring at his contacts, which consisted of messages from only Mick and Roxanne. He stared at them, tears welling in his eyes. He read through their anguish and pain and strife. He read their begging and bargaining and he sobbed.He wasn’t sufficient. He’d never be. So he’d stay here and leave his old life behind, spare some reminiscing on his phone to torture himself once he got too happy.
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
The cold surrounded him, claiming his mind and freezing it. He couldn’t think- couldn’t focus. Couldn’t do his work. The engineer groaned to himself.
In lumbered the heavy Russian. He knew the engineer would be cold by now. Any remotely snowy place froze the Texan’s bones. He pulled out a spare chair (the Demo’s, but he wasn’t here), and sat down, pulling the smaller man in his lap and surrounding him with his warmth.
The engineer sighed, letting himself be thawed by the Russian heater. As much as he hated the snow, at least it gave him this.
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
It was sweltering, and the Russian was pretty sure he was going to
die.
He swore he sweat enough to fill a bathtub and he had to chug ice water to keep the oncoming heat stroke at bay.
Dell couldn’t help but notice his miserable bear of a man, and he clicked together a mental solution. He headed out to town, getting a few bags of ice, and prepared an ice bath for him. Once he had it set, he got the Russian. As soon as Misha saw it he nearly burst into tears. He hugged Dell so tight the Texan thought he would break and eventually settled into it with a content sigh.
“Thank you so much,” he said.
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
It had been surprising how much work had gone into a wedding. Misha and Josef really hadn’t wanted anything too big. However gathering even the bare bones: families, had been a hassle.
Now though, they reaped the rewards. Their families mingled- and that, of course, included their war family. It had initially been nerve wracking to allow the soldier, but with the engineer their worries were soothed.
They ate cake, talked, danced, and celebrated their love, laughing and happy. Eventually everyone left, and they were left alone with each other. That was probably the best thing. Going back to their room and just being able to spend time alone together. Being able to be truly intimate and loving.
This was the end of their unmarried days, perhaps, but the beginning of something better.
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
Scott looked at the cyclops in disbelief. “You ain’t serious, are ya?” His tiny goat tail wiggled nervously.
The larger monster sighed. “Aye, I am, boyo.” He picked the satyr up, depositing him into his lap.
“You’re blind now?”
“Well, I cannae see,” the cyclops retorted, sorrow permeating through his voice.
“...” The smaller grumbled, leaning against his friend. “That’s a whole load of crap. Listen, if Poseidon doesn’t avenge you, I sure as Hades will!”
Donnor laughed at that. “Lad, you’re too puny for that.” He grinned, and Scott wondered how Helios could light the world when even the sun couldn’t outshine Donnor’s smile.
“No I ain’t, c’mon, if ya can’t see ‘em,
feel
my muscles!” The satyr flexed, taking Donnor’s oversized hand and pressing it against his bicep with a shit-eating grin.
“Nay, as strong as ye’re getting if anyone’s takin’ them oot it’s me.”
“Oh c’mon, I’m fast and you know it! I’ll sock ‘em and run!”
Donnor laughed. “Nay, it’s too dangerous, lad. At the least I’d have to go with you.”
“Mmr..” Scott grumbled, leaning against the cyclops more heavily in a sort of half-assed cuddle.
Donnor didn’t mind, it barely felt like any weight. He pet the other’s head with a smile. “Thanks for looking out for me.” He said warmly, happy.
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
Josef looked at the mountain of paperwork in front of him, sighing as he ran a hand over his forehead to soothe the growing headache. God damn it, he hated this part of the job. In fact, he hated most of the job. Okay, he did love the times when he could experiment- and how that was funded. Really that was the biggest reason he joined in the first place, but he hated his job.
That being said, he did not hate his team. Sure, sometimes he grew annoyed and impatient by their antics. Sometimes he wished he could shut them up, and realized that he could, but it would have more consequences later when he wanted them to talk (so he just decided to leave it and spare himself some regret and the person in question some horror). Sometimes he wished he could just bury himself in a hole of solitude and not have to face the world’s problems… that was right now.
There was a knocking on the door and he looked up wearily. “Ja? Come in,” he called, immediately tensing up when the scout walked through. Oh God he was going to get his ears talked off. Maybe he’d bury the scout instead, then again, that would fall under irreversible silencing, and he’d been over that thought circle already.
“I’m busy,” he said, almost as a defense.
“Oh, uh, yeah, I know that, um, well, I was just- uh,” Scout stammered, nervous that he was going to make the medic more annoyed and experiment on him next for this transgression- he got especially cranky on the days when he had a lot of paperwork, but those were the days he also didn’t eat unless told to. “I brought you some food.” He set it down on the table and scooted it over as though this were a hostage negotiation.
The medic looked at it thoughtfully, nodding. “Zhank you, Scout.” He said, scooting it closer. He took the fork, going to glaring at the papers as he absentmindedly shoved some food in his face. Oh good, it was Dell’s cooking. Through the corner of his eyes he noticed the younger hadn’t moved yet. “You can go.” He said.
The scout blanched awkwardly. “Uh, yeah, about that.” He said, scratching the back of his neck sheepishly. “Heavy wanted me to stay until you finish it.”
The medic looked over, irritation clear on his face. “Vell, I’m busy.”
“I’ll be quiet!” Scout gave a nervous smile. “Sorry- see, I’ll be right over here you won’t even notice me I’ll be quieter than… quiet!”
The medic scoffed. “Good start.” He said cooly.
Scott sulked. “I didn’t start being quiet.” He sat down beside him. “What even are you doing?”
“Kennicky, please,” Josef said wearily.
“I’m just wondering if I can help!”
“Can you forge my signatures perfectly? Can you make the same decisions I do? Then no-”
“What if I read the stuff and explain it to you!” He offered.
“Pfft, you explaining it would take longer than me reading it.”
The scout sulked.
“Just, if you’re quiet I’ll let you stay, alright?”
“Okay... “ He said sheepishly, closing his mouth. He pulled out a DS, starting to play that as a distraction, and though the lights were a bit distracting in themselves, Josef preferred that to Scout amusing himself in other ways.
He settled back into his work, surprisingly not minding the company. It reminded him to eat, too. He let the scout putter away. Maybe he’d let him stay again.
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
“This isn’t just about you. It’s about what’s best for all of us,” Tavish rasped, a hand against his stomach, the blood pooling and spilling out from beneath his fingers. He looked at the doctor who was currently pulling on some gloves with a scowl.
“You don’t understand.” He said, his voice gentle but his words firm. He pulled away the cloth concealing the sniper’s chest, his fingers moving swiftly to sew him up.
The demolitions expert hissed as the metal pierced his flesh, but he knew it was better than bleeding out. “Then please, Josef, explain it to me. I can’t keep doing this. I can’t keep defending what I don’t know about to people I love- to people who have good reasons for wanting to know.” He coughed up some blood.
The doctor didn’t seem worried. “It’s a long-term project, Tavish. And very secret. I can’t have Jayne going and running off. I can’t have D- I just can’t have this getting out. And I need funding.”
“Please, Josef. You know how worried they are- you see how Misha looks at you when you come home. You’re
so
tired, and it’s affecting us. What if they send you home?” Donnor asked, wiping the blood from his mouth.
Josef pet his head. “I know, Tavish, but I can handle it, I promise. I won’t be sent home. I’m not that tired.”
“You are. Please, the team.”
“Tavish, it’ll be alright.” He finished the job, giving him a quick boost with his medi-gun. “You should rest.” He concluded, glad he had the power and authority to end such a conversation so easily.
Tavish gave him a dirty look. “You can’t just-”
“We’ll deal with it later then,” the doctor assured, though all it was was a lie.
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
His kiss was fire, just like him. It spread warmth to your very core, but sends terror down straight after. It’s hot and dangerous and passionate, and you always feel yourself melting with it. You love spending time with him in the winter, letting his burning kiss soothe your shivers.
His kiss was ice, a reminder of his home. It was hesitant, careful, and slow. It was the pure white in a bride’s dress, the veil you gently lift to reveal your lover’s face. His kiss was small, contrasting with perhaps every part of him spare his personality. You seek him out when you need more sweetness in your life.
His kiss was a gust of wind, fast, free, and unsure. His inexperience keeps him improvising at every turn and fluttering around like a butterfly. He seeks you out, desperate to be a part of your world. He doesn’t know how much you love him.
His kiss was electricity, striking at a moment’s notice and shaking you to your core. It was hot and it always seemed spontaneous, and you can’t help but revel in the sheer power he has over you. You never seek him out, he descends upon you in an instant and you are left with no control, crazed by his touch.
His kiss was the warm Southern breeze on a crisp fall day, providing solace from the cold. It was gentle, loving, and relaxed. It leaves you with a stupid smile on your face as he drifts off on other business. You can’t help but chase after him, seeking his fleeting time for more of his intoxicatingly soothing kisses.
His kiss was the solid earth beneath your feet, grounding you as it supports you. It was security, reassurance, and knowledge. It was real and firm. He knows you, and you are left without doubt. You never mind a visit from him, quick to let him confirm his observations.
His kiss was the sticky humidity in the air on a hot summer’s day, it clung to you. It was playful, affectionate, and heated. It left your mind in a haze as he easily pulls you into more of his kisses.
His kiss was the gravel road beneath your feet, rough around the edges, but it took you places. It was sloppy, passionate, and guarded. You couldn’t fault the last part, and you try to ease him into it with tender touches. You can’t help but smile the next time he takes you away.
His kiss was the winter’s first snow. It’s hesitant, gentle, and fleeting. You know it’s a shock to the system, but he’ll warm up to you eventually, and you’ll see more of him. You can’t help but be intrigued, though you carefully avoid clinginess, knowing his kiss was a rare treat.
Order: Pyro, Heavy, Scout, Spy, Engineer, Medic, Demoman, Soldier, Sniper
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
Scout’s mom to Scout
My greatest joy in life is the pitter pattering of tiny feet. It’s the needy hug from an adolescent's arms. It’s the “I love you” called before the door slams. It’s the big grin when I say I’m proud. My greatest joy in life is my child, no matter what age they get to be.
Demoman to Scout
My greatest joy in life is the sounds of him running outside, but even better is the sound of the door opening and slamming. Quickly. Everything he does is quick. It’s the hug he tackles me behind for, the smiley kiss he pulls me into. It’s the “Love you” he texts me every morning, and the goodnight kiss I receive every night. My greatest joy in life is my husband, and all of his quirks.
____________________________________________________________________________
Sniper to Parents
My greatest joy in life are my parents. They’re a kind old folk, when they smile their eyes crinkle, and when they laugh their bellies shake. They’ve given me everything though I wasn’t their own. And as much as I hate it, they look out for me too. I don’t need the argument about my job every time I call them, but they’ve never threatened anything if I stayed, so I have. I take that as support without liking it, and it’s something I’m grateful for. I think I’m one of the few kids who loves to call their parents still.
Spy to Sniper
My greatest joy in life is the mysterious sniper who holds my heart. No, he doesn’t know that, and I am torn between ever wanting him to know or being completely safe and keeping myself confined between boundaries. He’s an intoxicating mystery, though, and I plan to drink until sated. Until I can look at him and know what he’s thinking. I eagerly await him allowing me to learn more, but for now, I shall spy.
____________________________________________________________________________
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
Austin stared at the snow fall outside the base from the solitude of the bedroom he was provided inside, his mind numb but clearly discontent with the situation. He didn’t want to do anything. It was freezing anyways, there didn’t seem to be a point.
He knew there was, though. There was always stuff to be done. Work was even more prevalent in snowy places like these, the cold always caused problems.
Problems that were too big for him, though, his mind provided, dragging him further into the fog.
He stared out the window, sadness weighing down on his soul, surrounding it, encapsulating it.
He heard stirring from another part of the base, but it was getting closer.
He got up, wanting to avoid it- wanting to avoid people in general.
It failed. His door opened.
The spy stood there, a bowl of soup in hands.
“Sit,” he urged.
Austin practically fell back onto the desk chair.
It was set in front of him with a flourish. Who has the energy for flourishes? Especially now. There’s nothing out here, now. There’s nothing in here, now.
“Eat,” the spy said.
Austin stared at the soup. He opened his mouth to say something snarky about poison, he seemed to have no appetite anyways, but then he closed it. Hell, would he really mind if it was poison? He’d get to leave this wintery void,
He felt so alone but he wanted to be alone. It was confusing. He wanted solitude, but he felt trapped in self-inflicted isolation at the same time.
“Honestly, bushman.” The spy tisked. Austin was a failure, he concluded about himself. “Do I ‘ave to feed you?”
What, he can’t even feed himself? He was lame. Lame and lazy.
“I’m not hungry, mate.” He said wearily.
“Come now, just a little. I ‘eard you ‘aven’t eaten supper.”
“Because I’m not hungry.” Irritation laced his tone, making the words knives, but the spy was good at dodging
all
knives, apparently, even ones laying in conversation.
“You still ‘ave to eat some.” He grabbed the spoon.
“I can do it.” Austin growled.
“I know you
can
, but you
won’t.
Open your mouzh,” he insisted.
Austin forced it open, only able to do it with the prompting, and his lips fell closed around the spoon. It was warm, nearly lukewarm. He wondered if the spy had been waiting for him, and had taken it after. He didn’t mind, it meant he didn’t burn his tongue and he didn’t have to blow on it.
The spoon slid out of his mouth. The spy fed him until he got irritable again.
“I don’t want anymore.” He said to the spoon in front of his mouth.
The spy looked at him. “Are you sure? Can you eat just a
little
more?”
“No, I’m not hungry. I don’t want it.” He said, more tired. He wanted to slump in his desk, maybe lose his bones, and become a puddle of sadness.
“Alright then.” The spy hesitated. “Is there anyzhing else I can do for you?” He offered.
“No.” Austin replied dully.
“Okay.” He gently rested a hand on his shoulder, though it didn’t seem to weigh him down anymore… surprisingly. Everything seemed to weigh Austin down recently. “Take care of yourself, okay?” He said softly.
“I’m trying.” He half-chuckled, half-scoffed. He sunk further into the desk.
The spy looked at him piteously. Maybe he’ll have to try and take care of him for awhile.
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
Donnor walked up and down the beach, his hands running over the seashell a few times. Who asks a guy out with a seashell? Apparently him. He was an idiot. He kept running his hands over the seashell, thinking about how wrong it felt to be without Scott, even just now. Before he realized, his feet were taking him to the younger man.
He knocked on the door of Scott’s little hotel room, and the younger bounded to a door, seemingly checked it (from the lack of footsteps and pause of noise), before he opened it. “Donnor!”
He hugged the man, and Donnor’s cheeks grew warm.
“How are you doing?” He squeezed him. Donnor squeezed back.
“I’m fine, yourself?” He said, lying about the anxiety rooted in his gut.
“I’m doing well,” he motioned to the comic book on the bed. “I was catching up on Wolverine.”
Donnor grinned. Wasn’t that cute? “Well how’s it going?”
“It’s going great!” He grinned wide, and Donnor felt his stomach twist into knots. Fuck he was gay.
“I was wondering if you might want to take a break from that?”
“Sure! What do you have in mind?”
“I was thinking,” Donnor’s cheeks warmed, and his hands trembled as he offered the seashell. “Maybe you’d want to go on a little date to the beach? We can get something to eat.”
Scott’s cheeks flushed too. “A date?” He echoed. “Heh- uh- uhh, yeah, I, uh, can totally date- Hell, back at home I was a date master! You’re really lucky you chose someone so good.”
Donnor grinned, and couldn’t help but to chuckle at the blatant lie. He patted his head. “Let’s go.”
The headed back to the beach, and Donnor couldn’t help but notice something glinting on Scott’s dog tags. “What’s that?” He blurted.
Scott looked down, confused. “Oh, that?” He blushed. “That’s my ma’s key. She gave it to me last time I visited. She doesn’t really move around a lot, and she wanted me to have a way to come in and see her.”
Donnor couldn’t help but smile. “Ain’t that sweet.”
“Ah shut up,” Scott said nervously.
“No, I mean it.”
Scott blushed and ducked his head.
“Hey, what’s that?” He asked, pointing to my wrist, where there laid a small string of golden thread.
“Ach, it’s me good luck charm!” Donnor said excitedly.
“Oh really? But it’s just string?”
“Nae, it’s string that brings good luck. I don’t like to wear it on the battlefield, ironically, but out here is nice since it won’t get cut or lost.”
“Makes sense.” Scott nodded.
They arrived at the restaurant, eating a fairly large meal outside. They were both gluttons. Neither minded, though, and both were thankful the other ate like normal in front of them.
Afterwards, they went back out to the beach.
“Hey,” Scott pointed. “There’s a vendor selling post cards!”
“Do you want to get one?” Donnor asked.
“Hell yeah! I want to make Rodney jealous!” He said, pumped.
“Pfft,” Donnor rolled his eyes. “Okay.” They went over, Donnor purchasing it before Scott could, to which the younger protested.
“Ach, hush yourself, it’s a gift.”
“You already gave me a seashell!”
Donnor laughed. “There’s tons of seashells around!”
“Well it was a nice seashell!”
“I know.”
Scott huffed, and Donnor ruffled his hair, chuckling. Scott rolled his eyes, sulking.
The woman behind the counter who wore such striking teal lipstick that Scott had secretly dubbed her lips piped in. “Maybe you can buy him something later?” She compromised.
Donnor chuckled. “Maybe, if I let him.”
Lips laughed. “Quite the pamperer?”
“I like to do what I can,” Donnor said proudly.
Scott crossed his arms, a mischievous smirk on his face. “We’ll see what happens,” he said, thinking of it as a competition.
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
Dell paced around the room, wringing his hands as he took deep breaths, trying to calm himself. To his left Able sat, watching the distressed man with a frown on his face. He didn’t want Dell to feel like this, or to worry like this.
So he wouldn’t let him. That’s it! He’d take care of it. He got up, going over. He gently lead Dell to a seat, sitting him down.
Dell looked at him, his blue eyes searching for a meaning. He still was wringing his hands, desperately trying to be rid of some of the stress through his fidgeting.
Able rubbed one of his shoulders, trying to ignore the butterflies in his stomach as he looked into the engineer’s beautiful eyes. He took a breath to compose himself. “I know you have a lot of anxiety, but you don't have to worry about this,” he reassured.
Dell opened his mouth.
“Ah ah ah- wait,” Able scolded. “I know it’s scary, but I promise I can take care of it, okay? You can trust me. I would never let you down. So don’t stress out about it, okay?”
Dell hesitated as he analyzed how much he trusted Able. Because he did trust him, but did he trust him with this? How could he? “How can you?”
Able thought about it for a second. “I could go with you. They’re starting to send clones out anyways,” he justified.
Dell shook his head. “I don’t want to endanger you.”
Able squeezed his shoulder. “You aren’t. I
want
to go with you anyways. Besides, your machinery is amazing, and I’ve been trained for this. I want to be there for you, Dell.”
Dell blushed, still hesitant. “I just don’t want to go out at all.”
Able looked at him, his heart breaking a little. He wished he could just lean over and kiss his head, but it was too soon. They’d finally split, but it hadn’t been long, and Able was a sensitive man,
unlike
Jayne. “We could run away.”
Dell laughed at that, and shook his head. Able tried his best to ignore how much he loved Dell’s laugh, but it definitely brought a smile out of him. “They’d find us. They have spies.”
“Well if we’d have to fight anyways…”
Dell chuckled. “If we have to fight anyways I”d rather an experienced doctor stay nearby.”
“And not to mention the serum, Dell, we’ll be fine. I
won’t
let you die,” Able said sincerely, resisting the urge to tell Dell that he loved him. It was too soon anyways.
Dell sighed, his shoulders slumping. But what if it was out of Able’s control.
Able noticed the look. “Dell,” he knelt before him. “I promise I won’t let you die. Do you trust me?”
Dell hesitated once more, before shyly locking eyes with Able, searching for something to trust. And… there was a lot. And though the situation seemed impossible, Able had been trustworthy and beyond for so long. So… maybe it wouldn’t be impossible. He seemed sincere.
Two weeks passed and Dell and Able had been deployed, working on the same team, viciously fighting over the scrap of land they were assigned to. They’d worked around base, and had a few battles to adjust. They weren’t the best. They weren’t battle-hardened or even really battle-ready yet, but they did what they could. Able worked hard and ruthlessly, intent on keeping his word.
And it was just barely enough when Dell got shot in the next battle. Again, he was there for Dell when he was hit, telling Dell enough to keep up his hopes in the doctors. Telling himself enough to feel beyond ashamed that he had
only
protected him from death.
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
"I’d like it if you stayed,” Scott said, it being the first time he spoke out to request this. He was shy about it, he didn’t want to be clingy. Because if he was clingy, if he clung, if he depended on him… He hated the thought of Donnor leaving. But something about tonight made him jump to keep the other there. Maybe it was the awful battle the team had today, or the stressful phone call from his mother afterwards, or perhaps it was the closeness of the demoman and the soldier, but he just.. He wanted… no, he
needed
Donnor to stay. So he finally spoke up.
Donnor raised an eyebrow, looking back to the timid kid. This was a first, not that he was complaining, but… “You okay?” He asked the younger, moving a little closer to Scott, away from the edge of the bed.
“Huh?” Scott asked, surprised. He wasn’t expecting that, he didn’t expect Donnor to care or to even be looking out for something like that. “Um,” he paused, thinking about it. Was he okay? He was asking Donnor to stay, he must not be doing that great if the day was so shit he had to cling to someone else. Then again, he did that when the days were shitty anyways, and since there were so many days… he clung. He hated that about himself. He knew he was alienating himself by being so dependent, and he was sure that his team would leave him if they good. He always talked too much anyways, and it’s not like he had anything smart to say like Engie or Medic. He sighed.
“Scott?” Donnor addressed again. “What’s wrong?” He asked, and everything about him turned delicate. It was strange, this boisterous, bouncy, loud, funny personality suddenly serious as he looked at Scott.
Scott looked back, again, surprised with Donnor. He shrunk in on himself a little. “You don’t have to worry about it. You don’t have to stay either… I just… well, I would like it…”
Donnor gently placed a hand over Scott’s “Love,” he addressed, and shivers went down Scott’s spine as his heart swelled. “I know I don’t have to. But I
want
to, and I want to know what’s troubling you.”
Scott’s cheeks warmed at the sentiment, and how steadfast Donnor was even though he was asking more. “It’s just been a shit day, an’ my ma ain’t doin’ so great,” he said finally, sighing. His shoulders slumped a little.
Donnor looked at him, slowly pulling Scott closer, into an embrace. “I’m sorry about that, love. Do you want to talk about it?” He asked. He knew Scott loved to talk.
Scott shook his head. “That’s fine,” he said softly, biting back emotion from the hug as he clung to Donnor. He didn’t want to trouble the other further. “I’d just like it if you stayed,” he repeated shyly.
Donnor smiled softly, kissing his forehead. “Of course I’ll stay.” He scooted back into the bed, feeling welcome finally to stay past sex. He wrapped an arm around Scott, pulling him close as he cuddled the man.
Scott took a breath, butterflies in his stomach as he held onto Donnor’s arm. He wasn’t needy… no… not too much at least, he was pretty sure. Either way, it felt nice to be supported. He felt safe and warm, and it was nice to have Donnor with him.
The two stayed like that for awhile, cuddling, before Scott dozed off first, his runner’s spirit needing to recharge desperately. Donnor was short behind, though, and the two spent the night locked in each other’s embrace.
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
Dell wheeled on Jayne, the ocean in his eyes storming as he glared into Jayne’s. There was a tangible tensity in the air as the Texan glared.
“I can’t believe you did that. What the Hell is wrong with you?” Dell asked, his fists curling.
Jayne immediately went on the defensive. “I didn’t do anything wrong! Why do you always take
their
side! They’re just clones!”
“They’re not just clones!” Dell shook his head. “They’re people! People who got shit on because of how they were born!”
“Oh yeah, this argument again. Well newsflash, Dell.
They weren’t born!
They’re not supposed to be here!” Jayne yelled back.
Dell jumped, before his blood boiled in his veins as he used all his will power not to punch Jayne. He wouldn’t stoop to his level. “I don’t get why you do this!”
“Because you keep taking their side! You keep whittling yourself away for them and you don’t even care about me! Or how I feel!”
“Yeah I’m gonna take their side Jayne when you say shit like that! Seriously! You’re just as bad as the people who say I’m unnatural, and that I’m going to Hell! You’re just as bad as the people who hate me because I’m gay!”
Jayne’s eyes flashed with anger, lightning crackling upon the stormy skies of his eyes. His fists curled, and he ignored the way Dell watched them, the way he tensed up. “You weren’t born in a lab!” He said finally. Dell still was tense seeing Jayne’s fists, how he was ready to just fight him, and for a brief moment he was teleported back to the first time he punched him. How powerless he felt when he blocked the exit. How Dell didn’t have years of combat experience but Jayne had no qualms using his against Dell. It left him with a sinking feeling in his stomach. He didn’t want to feel that powerless again, that scared.
Dell took a breath, trying to strategize. He was still mad, but he felt just a bad remark from a beating, and getting beaten up meant that he was powerless again. So that couldn’t happen. Tears began welling in his eyes with his frustration. He hated how trapped he was right now. He hated how much control Jayne had over this. Because Dell wasn’t stupid. He couldn’t fight Jayne- not fairly anyways. And he couldn’t run. Last time proved that.
Eventually he opened his mouth again, with a tentative plan to try and get his frustrations out. They burned his heart and he didn’t want the burden of them. Besides, a part of him still wanted Jayne to be able to change, to be better, to understand. He wanted Jayne to join him, fight against the system with him!
“Jayne,” he said, his voice as calm as he could make it, although that included some wavering. “It’s the same rhetoric. They didn’t chose to be born like that, but yet you still condemn them for it- for a choice they didn’t make.”
“Dell-” Jayne interrupted, his voice heated. “It’s
unnatural
. They were born, if you can even call it that, in a lab! It’s Godless!”
Dell gritted his teeth. “Well why would God have let it happen if it wasn’t in his plan!”
“To have it be a lesson! I don’t want you associating with them!”
“You’re fucking crazy!” Dell began, but one quick punch to the temple had his vision turn black as he thudded against the floor.
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
“I don’t want to be a story,” Dell said softly. “What do you mean?” “Stories always have so much trouble… I just want to have a simple, happy life. I don’t care if it’s boring.” “Mm,” the other nodded. It was unfortunate, but fair. “Well, I’m afraid with how things are going you’ll have to suffice with stories.” Dell grunted his acknowledgment, sighing.
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
Running away (Prompt)
Dell runs from a forbidden way of life
And trips on men he can’t pass up
So he hides what he can and does his best to stuff his fears away
And run from situations that will enlighten others
Scott runs from everything he can
Running is a release
From years of problems and pain
From thinking too deep about himself… about others… about someone he needed
He runs from pain
From bullies
His legs are the only protection he has
He’s learned to run fast
Josef runs away from confrontation
He hurls bodies in front of him as a shield
He intimidates and complicates to not be questioned
He laughs to mask the problem
To make it a show
Even if he knows he’d never buy another ticket
Donnor runs from mistakes
Sure, a wayward pinch of potassium chlorate may be one,
But getting hooked on the drink is the one that weighs on his mind
And no matter how far he runs it feels like it’ll never be enough
Jayne runs from feeling lost
He hates the gray areas in life
He craves knowing he can fight tooth and nail for what’s just and right
A discontinuity ruins the simpleness of mind that makes rocket launchers such a beautiful option
And it makes every headshot a question he doesn’t want to think about
Ivan runs from sadness
He attempts to wrap himself up in books
Or in people
To pretend like his ice cold home
Didn’t warm him up more
A family is a hard thing to leave
Alexander runs from reality
He’d much rather be caught in the sickly sweet fake fantasies
Than have to deal with an imprisonment that he had gotten himself into
Austin ran from people
Secluded up in towers he was safe from mistakes
Secluded up in towers he could be his most disgusting, real self
He didn’t ever think he could be fully accepted
And so the less painful, happier road was to stay away
Florence ran from the truth
He did what he could to conceal himself
To pretend that he was someone else
To pretend that he was good
To avoid problems
Even when those problems were people
He loved to craft the world around his new persona
And ignore the fact that it hurt who he cared about
Or the people that he should care about
He just wondered
If at some point the lie would become him
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
Josef glanced over to the man in his room. Judas was often quiet or muffled. Lately, he had been staying around him, watching quietly or reading. Judas still hadn’t talked to him yet. He secretly wondered if he ever would.
Judas watched the doctor quietly. He grabbed a clipboard, writing out ‘Am I bothering you?’ He would ask normally, but if he lifted his mask he knew the sight would be horrifying.
Josef squinted through his glasses before he got the message. “No.” He looked around. “Nobody’s here,” He said. “I’m a doctor… if you wanted to try to speak normally maybe I could continue my work.”
‘I am deformed’ Judas wrote, looking at the man nervously.
Josef nodded. “I’ve seen a lot of gore in my life,” he placated.
Judas hesitated, his heart skipping a beat. He did want to speak. It had been a long time… He hesitantly peeled off the mask. It was much easier to breathe. “Ahm, I can put the mask back on,” he said nervously, smiling to try and get rid of the jittery feeling.
Josef watched him, noting the smile. “I like your smile. And you have a nice voice,” he said, going back to his work.
“Oh, uhm, thank you,” Judas said, utterly shocked. His smile widened. “Perhaps I could take off my mask while I’m in here alone with you.”
Josef gave a little smile. “That sounds nice. It’s easier to understand you like this.”
“Yeah,” Judas confessed. “Thanks.” He said softly.
“There’s nothing to thank me over,” Josef maintained, working diligently, his mind wandering. He had seen the most of pyro out of everyone and despite the scars and problematic patches, he was quite the handsome man. He was lucky, he decided, and his mind wandered to what he would, could, or should do now that he had this power.
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
Jayne gripped Dell’s hand. It was the only thing left to do. After all, it was much too late to manage anything more. He looked at the rickety death machine. He really shouldn’t have been so prideful.
“Remind me why we took this dare?” Dell said as the machine began a jerky bit of rolling. He gripped the hand tighter.
“Tavish just went on this, and… pride,” Jayne responded through gritted teeth, gripping down tightly on the hand, although he stubbornly refused to hurt him, so he restrained himself that fraction of pressure.
Dell didn’t mind. He didn’t want to let go of Jayne’s hand anyway, not on this death machine. “Of course.”
The machine chewed at the rails, sounding displeased with its meal as it climbed its way up to the summit. Dell closed his eyes, his mind forcing him to imagine what all of the sounds that didn’t sound quite right were, and of all the ways they could die from this thing.
Time stopped as they hit the crest, both of them knowing what was going to happen. The terrifying drop.
Dell bit back a scream, but it was pretty muffled against him biting his lips as he did all he could to restrain himself. Jayne also screamed, but it quickly turned into enjoyment. He understood less of the machine’s groanings, and the adrenaline rush was something he was used to.
The rest of the ride whipped by, Jayne finding himself loving it as Dell did his best not to vomit. The pair got up, Jayne having to support Dell’s wobbly knees. They reached a bench, and Dell was seated before Jayne and Tavish went to go on it with each other a few more times.
Dell let them, just glad to be back on solid ground where he could think his own thoughts. Besides, down on the ground, a mysterious stranger let him pet his dog, and that was the low-level enjoyment he craved anyway.
|
10583970
|
Safety Belt
|
{
"Archive Warning": "Underage Sex",
"Category": "M/M",
"Characters": "Alexander Hamilton, George Washington, John Laurens, Gilbert du Motier Marquis de Lafayette",
"Fandom": "Hamilton - Miranda",
"Language": "English",
"Rating": "Mature",
"author": "by Washingdaddy",
"chapters": "3/?",
"completed": "",
"published": "2017-04-10T00:00:00",
"words": "1,123",
"Additional Tags": "Alternate Universe - High School",
"Relationship": "Alexander Hamilton/George Washington",
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|
Alexander dropped his books on the desk, normally he would be at the receiving end of a famous 'Washington glare', but today was different. There was no loud "take your seats" or "boys you can talk at lunch." No he waited patiently, eyes narrowed hands holding his chin, focused. John hit his shoulder, "dude, stop staring at Mr Washington before you have Hercules on your ass, you know how protective of his friends he is," Alex shook his head a 'huh leaving his mouth, "John, im just noticing how different he is today, look."
"Whatever." Both took their seats, watching as Lafayette sat beside them.
U.S. history was as normal a favorite class of Alexander's, he could actually be seen as something other than the 'annoying bastard from the Caribbean,' this was mostly due to the "no one is superior, unless superiority is earned" policy Washington had. Honestly he knew Washington had his favorites, and by god he knew he was one, it enabled him to push the boundaries, say things he wouldn't normally say. More importantly it allowed him room to breathe. He wasn't used to being anyone's favorite, you see, no one likes a bastard. The world may have changed but many people haven't, Alexander was lucky enough to live in one of those areas, where people would jeer at every different person, "god made us all different, but how dare you show your differences, how dare you be different then me." Washington's class was his safety belt, and boy was he in for a ride.
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
The class ticked on, Hamilton took notes, Laurens daydreamed and Lafayette doodled. "General Jacksons army camped at valley forge, in my opinion, a genius plan. Close enough to Philadelphia to keep an eye on the British, but far away enough to avoid an attack," Washington was always very passionate about his lessons, you could tell he enjoyed his subject and liked the class. "Of course, they were low on supplies and illness spread like wildfire, and did I mention the spies?" He said in his surprisingly upbeat deep voice, the bell rang out and you could hear the sounds of students packing up, Alexander picked up his binder and pencil and moved towards the door. Washington called Alexander to come back to the classroom as he was walking out into the hallway. "Mr. Hamilton!" Alexander raised an eyebrow, that's a new one, it was always either Alexander or Alex. He stepped into the room. "Yes, Mr Washington?" He asked innocently, playing with his binder corner, "Come in, sit, close the door on your way!" He closed the door behind him, as he sat down in a chair across from Washington's desk, placing his books on the floor. "I wanted to talk to talk to you about a few things concerning your grade in my class." Alexander was confused, he had outstanding grades."Mr. Washington there must've been a mistake-" Washington cut him off with 'the glare'. He silenced himself immediately. "Son,-" "Dont patronize me I'm not your son." He felt anger bubble inside him. "Son, you have a 30 in this class" Washington's voice now teeming with annoyance. Alexander couldn't hold it back, he opened his mouth and it all poured out at once. "Call me son one more time!"Washington stood up abruptly. "Hamilton go home," he sounded aspirated , he sounded as though someone had removed his battery, he sounded deeper, and Alexander wasn't going to lie, he liked it."No sir, please," "Hamilton," it was stern, a command. "Sir, with all due respect I will not go home, this class room is home, for fucks sake!" Suddenly he saw the anger in Washington's eyes. He had never seen this before, Washington was normally so in control, so calm, passive. Even when dealing with Jefferson, he never shouted, never acted unprofessionally. Before he knew what was happening, Washington leaned across the desk, grabbed the lapels of this shirt, and pulled him in. He was certain his shirt was going to rip with the commanding grip Washington had on him. Alexander was dragged forward, no regret in his actions or words, this is was he wanted. Their lips met, there was no fireworks, no life changing realizations. For a moment it was just them, together, connected, Alexander tilted his head and closed his eyes, placed his hands on Washington's shoulders. But he was pushed back, suddenly it was over.
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
"Go home" Washington repeated, both voice and face remaining stern. Alexander shook his head, "I leave now and you'll avoid me, and I think we both know that's not what I want." Washington pressed his face into his palms, he looked softer, almost upset. "Alexander, it's not morally or legally right. Alexander looked down at his feet, he knew what he was about to say was indelicate and, for the most part, untrue. "You have no control, and quite frankly, neither have I, sir."
"It's still illegal"
That caused Alexander to think for a moment, four months until graduation, four months of not being able to have Washington touch him how he wanted him to, four months of not being able to kiss him, he couldn't wait that long. "I'm eighteen, I graduate in four months, no one will catch us" Alexander's voice was fast and clear.
Washington did not respond, he did not move or do anything, almost as if he was but a painting, a painting that would undoubtedly hang in Alexander's mind forever. "S-sir?" Alexander stepped closer to him, "I am always so in control, I don't know why I can't resist" he moved to look at the man at the other side of the desk. "Hamilton, this will require discretion, we only have our little 'rendezvous' in my appartement, understood?" The stern gaze returned. Alexander took one of his teachers hands, "yes sir, oh, by the way, I'm not delicate"
Alexander ran to join Lafayette where he was waiting by the locker, "Lion, what did you do?" A smile plastered on his face. "The question, Gilbert, is not what I did, it's what am I about to do" at this Lafayette's eyes popped. "I didn't actually think it would work" Alexander smirked, he was always confident about his ability to seduce people, not matter who you are, you have at least once, wanted to fuck Alexander Hamilton. "Move over ring plot, here comes the grade plot" he finger gunned at his friend. "I'm at least ninety precent sure, that two ladies saving their husbands friend from certain death, then having the wit to steal their rings, as a test, is a bit more poetic than failing your class so your teacher will fuck you." Lafayette teased, "just a smidge" he replied.
|
10549908
|
poems about warrior
|
{
"Archive Warning": "No Archive Warnings Apply",
"Category": "M/M",
"Characters": "Sidney Crosby, Evgeni Malkin",
"Fandom": "Hockey RPF",
"Language": "English",
"Rating": "Explicit",
"author": "by coricomile",
"chapters": "1/1",
"completed": "",
"published": "2017-04-05T00:00:00",
"words": "1,467",
"Additional Tags": "Established Relationship",
"Relationship": "Sidney Crosby/Evgeni Malkin",
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}
|
Sid doesn't actually like getting hurt. It's part of his job, par for the course really, but it doesn't mean he particularly likes it the way some of the other guys do. They show off their scars in bars to pretty girls, compare fractures and grossness of wounds and bruises while they heal. Sid mostly gets annoyed. "Whole team riot if you on IR, too," Geno says. He slots himself neatly behind Sid, his hands resting on the bathroom counter, his bare chest warm against Sid's back. Sid's been poking at the cut on his chest, leaned in close to the mirror to see better. It's not deep, but it'll probably scar. "Don't jinx it," Sid says automatically. It's a minor miracle that they're even where they are right now. The baby Pens have been great, and Sid has told each and every one of them that they've made a difference to the team because it's true, but- But the playoffs are a way different thing than the AHL, and no one can make up for Geno and Tanger and Olli. "No more block with throat," Geno says. His reflection in the mirror is grinning, eyebrows raised and lips quirked up, but he sounds serious. "I didn't actually mean to do that," Sid whines. He's fucking lucky that the puck didn't get him in the windpipe and he knows it. He leans back against Geno because he can, because he's tired and it's been a long, long season and hopefully it'll be an even longer playoffs run. Geno hums, one arm sliding around Sid's waist, the other curling around his chest. It's moments like these that get Sid through. His life has been hectic since puberty, full of places he needed to be and people he needed to talk to and charm and routines to be upkept. But Geno is solid and warm behind him, his touch more grounding than suffocating. He pushes and he drives Sid crazy on a daily basis, but this- this is going to be happening for the rest of their lives, long after their bodies give up. Geno's always going to be his quiet place in the storm. Geno touches his fingers to the swollen, hot skin around the cut, gentle as he traces an edge. It's not that big an injury, but it'll pull at his skin as it scabs over, will get irritated under his pads, will sting every time he sweats. It's going to take forever to heal and Sid's already cranky about it. He hisses when Geno presses down harder. "Fucking ow," he says, batting Geno's hand away. Geno gives him a sheepish smile before leaning down to kiss the side of Sid's neck. He lingers there, his weight slowly pushing Sid into the counter. He's not subtle, but Sid likes when people are straightforward with him. He doesn't have time to figure people out for context clues or whatever. It works well between them. "Looks good," Geno says against Sid's shoulder. His hand slides up Sid's chest, his palm catching over Sid's nipple in a way that makes Sid shiver. He doesn't touch the cut again, but he runs his fingertip lightly around it, his thumb brushing over Sid's adam's apple. "Not as good as puck to face, but close.""Fuck you," Sid huffs, fighting against the laugh building in his chest. Geno steps closer, bending just enough to press his half-hard cock against Sid's ass. "I'm try," Geno says. It's so stupid that Sid has to laugh then. Geno tells the worst jokes and has found a way to turn absolutely everything into an innuendo, and Sid should be turned off by it. He really should be. Unfortunately- or maybe fortunately, if he wants to look at it differently- he's not. Sid tips his head back against Geno's shoulder, eyes slipping closed as Geno rubs a lazy hand over his stomach. He's exhausted and sore, the game catching up to him, but he doesn't want to move to the bedroom yet. He's boxed in between Geno and the sink, both of them holding him up, and it feels lazy and indulgent in a way he hasn't been able to have for a long time. Geno slips his hand into Sid's sweats and Sid leans back to give him room. "Gonna scar," Geno says as wraps his fingers around Sid's cock. Sid glances at the mirror. Geno's staring at the cut, his fingertips still stroking over the skin just outside of it. "You big badass.""You like it," Sid says. He gets it; sometimes he looks at the scar on Geno's cheek, the one on his collarbone, the one on his knee and gets hot. It means Geno's tough. It means he's been hurt, but come back stronger. Geno just hums again and rocks his hips against Sid's. Sid braces himself against the counter, bending forward just enough to give Geno a good angle. Every part of him is humming, a low buzz he's in no rush to get rid of. Geno brushes his thumb over the cut, deliberate and just a little mean, and Sid jerks. Geno hisses out a sharp breath, his fingers going tighter on Sid's cock. Sid's chin drops against his chest and groans. He pushes back against Geno as best he can, a pale imitation of the fucking they don't have the time or energy for. Sid feels like he's floating. Everything he is has been reduced to Geno's hard, efficient strokes, to Geno's hips grinding against him hard enough to push him into the counter, to the spike of pain every time Geno touches the cut. It can't last forever, but Christ he wants it to. He forces his eyes open and looks into the mirror. He looks like a fucking mess. His hair has dried into sloppy curls and his skin is an unflattering red all the way down to where the counter cuts off his view. Four short, bright welts sit just below the irritated wound from where Geno keeps sinking his nails in. Geno, though- Geno's eyes are so dark in the mirror, his mouth moving silently as he carefully and systematically takes Sid apart. Sid had told him once to tone down the dirty talk- it made him uncomfortable hearing the things Geno had to say, even if he was an active participant in actually doing those things- and he wishes, just for a second, that he hadn't. "Fuck," Geno mutters. It sounds loud in the bathroom, echoing off the tile. He finally drops the arm he's had wrapped around Sid's chest and winds it around Sid's waist instead, pulling Sid back into him. Sid reaches back to grab Geno's biceps, the muscle hard under his fingertips, and hangs on for the ride. Sid comes like that, trapped in place and exposed, shaking against Geno's chest as he tries to keep his knees from going out under him. Geno swears again, his fingers digging into Sid's hip as he thrusts harder, faster. Sid watches them in the mirror through slitted eyes. He looks as wrecked as he feels, as sluggish, but there's something unbearably hot about Geno just using him like this. Sid makes a note to explore that later, when he can think about more than just the feel of Geno's cock against his ass. When Geno comes, his nails scrape over Sid's hip, sharp enough to make Sid hiss. They'll sting when he sweats, just like the injury on his chest- a lingering little reminder of this moment. Geno sags forward and Sid scrambles to catch himself on the counter again. The back and front of his sweats are wet and gross and starting to get kind of itchy, but he stays there for a moment, holding Geno up. "I just showered," he says eventually. Geno snorts and pats him weakly on the hip before standing back up. Sid shakes out his legs and turns around. He lifts his chin and waits. Geno grins, soft and unbearably smug, and kisses him. "Not my fault you have sexy moment," he says against Sid's mouth. He bends farther and brushes his lips over the cut. It tingles, the area around it even more sensitive and tender than it had been when Sid had been poking at it on his own. "You're so weird," Sid says. Geno's soft laughter sends goosebumps up his arms. "Fuck, I'm tired. Come on." Sid shoves his nasty sweats off and heads back to the shower. He's going to pass out the second he's horizontal. "So much whine," Geno says as he follows Sid in. "Don't know why I'm try.""Because I put out," Sid says. "Yes," Geno agrees, pushing into Sid's space as soon as the shower door is closed. "Only reason."
|
10559380
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Sad Boy
|
{
"Archive Warning": null,
"Category": null,
"Characters": "Danny Noriega | Adore Delano, Bianca Del Rio, Courtney Act, Violet Chachki, Pearl Liaison, Kurtis Dam-Mikkelsen | Miss Fame, Max Malanaphy, Willam Belli, Alaska Thunderfuck 5000, Original Characters, Dan Donigan | Milk, Gia Gunn, Laganja Estranja, Trixie Mattel, Katya Zamolodchikova",
"Fandom": "RuPaul's Drag Race RPF",
"Language": "English",
"Rating": "Mature",
"author": "by Queen_of_Milktea",
"chapters": "134/134",
"completed": "2019-11-18",
"published": "2017-04-07T00:00:00",
"words": "210,325",
"Additional Tags": "Alternate Universe - High School, Bullying, Growing Up, Homophobia, Homophobic Language, physical bullying, verbal bulling, Gay Character, Underage Drinking, Underage Drug Use, Underage Smoking, Drug Abuse, Overdosing, Self-Harm, Self-Denial, Self-Hatred, Teenagers, Alternate Universe - Teenagers, Illegal Activities, Religion, Religious Guilt, Slow Burn, Slow Build, Slow Romance, Angst, Fluff, Hurt/Comfort, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Dark, Not Happy, Sorry Not Sorry, Depression, literally just character building, cheating?",
"Relationship": null,
"Character": null,
"Relationships": "Bianca Del Rio/Danny Noriega | Adore Delano, Violet Chachki/Pearl Liaison, Courtney Act/Dan Donigan | Milk, Courtney Act/Willam Belli, Laganja Estranja/Gia Gunn, Pearl Liaison/Trixie Mattel, Pearl Liaison/Max Malanaphy, Trixie Mattel/Miss Fame, Kurtis Dam-Mikkelsen | Miss Fame/Max Malanaphy, Max Malanaphy/Danny Noriega | Adore Delano, Trixie Mattel/Katya Zamolodchikova, Violet Chachki/Kurtis Dam-Mikkelsen | Miss Fame",
"Series": null,
"Collections": null,
"Fandoms": null,
"Archive Warnings": "Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death",
"Categories": "F/M, M/M, F/F",
"Bookmarks": null,
"Chapters": null,
"Comments": null,
"Completed": null,
"Hits": null,
"Kudos": null,
"Published": null,
"Words": null,
"Updated": null
}
|
If you had told Danny; before this whole fuck-storm, before all this emotional baggage was thrown over for him to catch; that he would be in great shit, he might have actually laughed. Like a small chuckle. Maybe he would quickly deny it, with his mind darting over to his sexuality in a second. Danny was a boy who believed that his own story, the story of his life, didn’t revolve around him. It revolved around others. It revolved around him helping others. And he was fine with it. He came to terms with it. Growing up with big personalities like Roy and Courtney...he could never really compete. He didn’t want to compete. Sure, the three had been friends for his whole life, but at the end of the day, he was no match for a popular blonde or a comedic theatre kid. He was just “Sad Boy”--as he got dubbed as--and that was okay with him after a while.His mindset as a “boring, miserable kid” followed him everywhere. Even on his Big Day. No, not his wedding. No, not his birthday either. Not even his graduation. The day that he walked into the gym lockers on a particular Friday.Danny pressed his hands onto the coarse surface of the building. His eyes darted over to the field. There didn’t seem to be many people, only a few by the stands, looking as if they were about to leave. He sighed. He wasn't even attracted to women, but the thought of going into the girls' bathrooms still made him fluster. He didn’t really want to be known for being a pervert or anything. Though he already had the “fag” tag stapled to his neck like some sort of prison nametag. Courtney had just asked him to duck into the locker rooms for her to fetch a few things. Her uniform, her change of clothes and a few books she’d accidentally forgotten. Though he wasn’t really into the idea of maybe getting caught, she persisted and persisted, saying that Dan, her boyfriend, would get mad if she wasn’t there to see their game. She pleaded that she had to be there because he was quarter back. And of course she just had to be captain of the cheerleading team too. Because they just weren’t picturesque enough.Just before his fingers wrapped around the door, he heard a faint noise. A very faint noise. Just loud enough for him to hear. It took a while until he could decipher what it was.It was a sob. A small sob. Like it was getting muffled by, most likely, a palm. It wasn’t inside, however. It was by the boys' locker room. He lingered by the door, switching back and forth on whether to ignore the sound, or actually help.He swore his mind went blank at that second. The bright light shone down to his eyes, basically blinding him. When he fluttered them open and rubbed away the foggy aftertaste of the much-too-glary light, he found a boy underneath the showers. He had his knees pulled into his chest. His hands were cupped over his calves with his nails digging into his skin roughly. Danny winced at how harsh it was, watching at the red-rawstrokes been left behind by his blood-drawing cuts. Danny’s first instinct was to hold up his arm and lunge towards him. He desperately wanted to grab onto his wrist to make him stop. But he finds himself just scrunching up the fabric of his shorts. Unmoving.“H-Hey…?” he says in a near-inaudible whisper. The other boy’s head jolts up in an instant, to reveal his bruise-stained face. He recoiled in fear, quick enough to slam against the dirty tiles of the bathroom. “N-No I’m not trying to hurt you.”“That’s what they all say…” his voice was low and husky. Wiping away a trail of blood dripping by his lips, he gazed up at Danny. He created an aura of hatred, just from the split moment of contact, but he could see through it. He could see that tiny crack in the corner, revealing a much softer, fearful state of mind that he was really in. And he felt pretty bad too. “I-I’m sorry for what happened…” she crouched over to him. His palm left his side, just to hover above the unknown boy’s knee. He wanted to show affection, to let him know that everything was going to be okay, but he barely knew him. Shit, he didn’t even know his name. “What am I doing?” he snickered. It somewhat took Danny by surprise, and he found his body easing down to the ground. “I’m really coming off rude, aren’t I?” he grumbled and shook his head. “I always seem to do that. I’m sorry...for that.”“I-It’s okay,” he ran his fingers through his cowlicked hair. “...Danny…”He took out a hand and placed it between them. The other boy stared down at it oddly. “Jason,” he shook it rather loosely. They exchanged glances of greeting, but Danny received it rather stiffly. “Sorry again, for this stupid meeting,” he dabbed his bright red cheek with his sleeve. “I really didn’t expect anyone to come here after school. I thought everyone else would be at the game.”“Sports is not my thing,” he shrugged. “I can barely do a handstand.”Jason chuckled.“But it's like mandatory,” he folded his arms on top of his knees.
"Well not really," he gestured. "But what the heck, I might bother to go after."
There was a slight pause. Danny watched Jason move his hand up and down his black jeans. He couldn't tell whether he was cold or uncomfortable. Maybe a little down. Probably all three.
“What are you doing here anyway?”Danny snapped back into reality and moved his eyes towards his.“I was asked to get a few things for Courtney,” he explained. Jason hummed.“Queen bee,” he joked, letting a minimal smile creep onto his lips. “Does she use you as a slave or something?”“Oh nah, she’s my neighbour,” he pressed his palm onto the icy ground. “She’s a lot nicer than what most people expect.”“She’s also a lot dumber,” he cackled. Danny eyed him somewhat harshly, making the other brunette gulp. Parting his lips, he looked as if he was about to speak, but Danny cracked up too. “Okay, I’ll give you that,” he snorted. Jason gave a sigh of relief, bringing his hand to his chest, before bursting out into laughter himself.
"You got me there," he snickered. He shifted his weight towards his hand as he lifted himself up. Danny watched him with somewhat confusion. "Are you coming? We might miss the game."
"W-We're going like...now...?" he muttered, mimicking his move. Jason raised an eyebrow.
"Of course! It's like school tradition. We basically have to," Danny shrugged.
"Fine, fine. But I need to get Courtney's things first."
They exchanged one last glance. Jason had a faint smile, and Danny replied with a lopsided smile himself.
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
Danny watched Jason rock back and forth on his feet, like his strength was rotating from his ball to his heel. He had an expression of excitement as he watched the field. It was filled with 2 teams, separated by the two different school colours; blue and red. Danny gazed at the intertwining colours, all fanned across the green grass field.
“Yes! You can do it Matt!”
Danny snapped his attention over to Jason, who was screaming at the top of his lungs. His upper body was basically hanging over the rails, and Danny wondered if this was even safe. He was waving overdramatically, fist pumping and pointing towards one of the goals. “I didn’t know you were so into sports,” he snickered, coiling his fingers around the steel railings. Jason shrugged stiffly.“A-A little,” he rubbed the back of his neck. “I’m a cheerleader after all.”“A cheerleader who can’t do a handstand,” he snorted. Jason shot him a look of anger, his brows crinkling together. “Why are you so interested anyway?” Jason proceeds to eye the football player who, at the time, had a ball in his right hand. Danny couldn’t deny it, he was a pretty good looking guy. No matter how much he denied his own sexuality. He had light brunette locks gelled back in a sleek manner. He had the bluest eyes that were so prominent and so beautiful, even from far away, and even when squinted like they were then as he fought against the wind blowing into his eyes. There was something about him that gave an aura of calmness. In a way, he looked so serene, even though he was running at lightning speed. Though his features were robust and strong, he had a sprinkle of pink across his cheeks, making him look a tad softer and gentle. “Are you checking him out?” Jason suddenly asked. The simple question sent trickles of fear through Danny. He shuddered at his spine cracking apart to then reassemble stiffly. He felt a sudden blast of air travelling up his throat like some air vent. “N-No. Of course not. Why would I? I don’t swing that way,” Danny bit down on his lip nervously as he watched Jason raise an eyebrow. “Dude, it was just a joke. Calm down,” he smirked, rubbing his thumb over Danny’s shoulder. The younger boy took a sigh of relief, leaning his folded arms over the rails. “But everyone knows about that.”“Everyone knows about what?” he cocked a shoulder. Jason snickered.“You know? That,” he nudged on. When Danny obliviously blinked, he groaned and rolled his eyes. “You’re fucking gay. Everyone knows it.”“W-What--?!”“Calm down,” he tried to soothe him by stroking down his arm. “Everyone says it. There’s no point in trying to deny it.”“W-Was it Brad? Did he start this?” he snapped his head towards him. Jason held up his palms defensively.“Dude, calm down,” he knitted his brows together. “I’m not judging, seriously. At all. You don’t need to fight back so much.”“I-I’m sorry…” he faced his body over to the field and brought his hand to his lips. He felt his heated fingers bounce along his quivering bottom lip. “I didn’t mean--”“It’s fine,” his voice was slightly pointed, but it had the tint of sympathy. “I know what it’s like…”“D-Do you really?” he was almost whispering, maybe because he didn’t really want him to hear, or maybe it was because he wasn’t alone for once and he wasn’t ready to take the next step.“Why else do you think I have these bruises?” he ended his sentence with a laughter, but Danny knew that it was forced. He could pick up on the smallest specks of hurt. “...I’m sorry to hear that…” he mumbled, his eyes tracing the long line of purple-blue stains. It started by his jawline, dying a painful path down to his collarbones. It became darker and harsher, all the way to the skin tucked underneath his shirt.Jason let out a long sigh, easing his back into a hunch as he gazed over to the field. His eyes were slightly squinted, the blinding lights beaming towards him harshly. The stadium’s large glares seemed to dim out the background, like there was an aura of focus and admiration cloaked over Jason’s silhouette. Danny felt his lips part, either from awe, or to speak, but no words seemed to pipe out. He, instead, clasped his hands together and watched him draw out a smile. “Hell yeah Matt!” he suddenly craned up, cheering. He pumped his fist into the air, bouncing excitedly as he screamed at the top of his lungs. The crowd behind them were doing the same, yelling and shouting tensely. Their radiating cries pressed up against Danny’s back, basically straining him between the metal fence. “We won! We fucking won!” Jason threw his arms around Danny, pulling him tightly into his chest. The younger boy could feel his voice echoing through his head. “You know who did it?! Fucking Matt! Of course he did!” he parted to reveal the widest smile. “Argh god, he’s so great.”“Woah there, don’t be so subtle about your feelings for him,” he teased. Jason turned around and placed his hand onto his head. With his fingers intertwining with his locks, he tossed it up messily. “Shut up Danny,” he slurred, snorting. His eyes dart over to the field, which was now dwindling in number. Some of the players had hoisted Matt into the air, cheering loudly and celebrating. The brunette was in a fit of laughter, and his back eased back onto their palms. Danny watched Dan dash over to Courtney, who had just hopped off of the human pyramid (where she was the top, of course). He lifted her up into the air, and gave her a light twirl as she pressed her lips against his lovingly.“You coming to the after party?” Jason perked up, parting the metal rails. Danny snapped back into reality and trailed after him.“U-Uh nah…” he scratched the back of his neck. “Not my scene. Plus, Courtney goes all “mom-mode” on me whenever I’m at parties.”“Cute,” he noted, laughing. They both descended a small stair case, leading towards the underground floor. “It seems so on paper. But she won’t leave me alone for the whole night! Nonetheless drink, smoke or dance,” he pouted, crossing his arms. “She’s just looking after you,” he nudged him gently, though Danny caressed his own aching chest after. As the younger boy parted his lips to speak, he was cut off by Jason dashing away so suddenly. He had run over to Matt, who was by himself at the time. There was a towel wrapped around his neck, with one end held up towards his forehead as he wiped away his sweat. Jason had the most exaggerated gestures, but it seemed like Matt was enjoying it, from the way he bursted out into laughter and clutched his shoulder for support. The football player proceeded to peer up at him, a wide grin by his lips. He watched Jason gulp, straighten his back and flush a little redder, which made him chuckle again.Danny just decided to leave them alone, giving him a tiny wave goodbye as he left the stadium. Zipping up his jacket and then shoving his hands into his pocket, he took one last glance towards the bright hallways of the floor beneath the main stadium. Matt’s eyes were constantly boomeranging back and forth, observing every inch of the area in his vision. He tried to cover it up, but the brunette could tell easily, and Danny knew that he was getting more and more worried. Jason bent down to his view and muttered something, that Danny interpreted as a worrisome comment. He replied with a small shake of the head and crinkled brows. There seemed to be a moment of silence, like they were swallowing or exhaling. Maybe both. Danny figured that they were feeling very conscious, especially since they were in such a populated area. He understood. Completely. It seemed as if anyone who was different was shamed and damned. And maybe that’s what Danny hated about himself the most. The fact that it got to him every single time.
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
Danny remembered it. Much too vividly. The way the preacher ruffled his hair lightly, just enough to toss his dark locks over his forehead. That's when the light was peeking through just a tad. The rays were piercing through the colourfully stained glass like it was cracking apart the confinements of the church. Danny could imagine himself. Petite. Young. Innocent. As he peered up at him with the widest smile. He remembers wearing that tight, black tux. Its cool, sheer fabric laced along his warm body. His heartbeat was at a slow, lagato pace, like it was ticking away at the rhythm of his watch.
“You're a special boy”
The preacher's words were low and husky, but it seemed to be lined with calming motivation. It was enough for Danny to believe it. To take it in and create a wider smile. To fuel his cheeks to fluster into a peachy shade. ...to fool him. To deceive him. To make him believe that he wouldn't be hated. Wouldn't be damned. Wouldn't be left to rot in hell. Danny shook his head. He'd let his thoughts drive him off again into some nostalgic nightmare. His back felt cooler against the cream coloured walls. Just enough to pluck his nerves and ease him into his bed.
COURTNEY: Danny
COURTNEY: Danny?
COURTNEY: Danny please pick up
Danny groaned into his hands, his palms wiping away his heated face. It was like sweat brushed along his cheeks and forehead, creating a thick coat of uncomfort. He swung his arm over to his nightstand to lazily drag in his still buzzing phone.
DANNY: yeah?
COURTNEY: you’re not at the party, right?
The blue light rays were keeping his eyes open. It was if they were piercing apart his eyelids, though there was still a feeling of drowsiness and tiresomeness over the rest of his limp body.
DANNY: no
DANNY: wouldn’t you know that?
COURTNEY: …
DANNY: aren’t you there?
The boy stared at his screen, the three floating dots jabbing him in the chest with nerves. It was a slow reply, to say the least. Courtney couldn’t be in trouble...right…? It wasn’t like her to not attend an after party; she was the head cheerleader. Even though Courtney’s a year older, it’s not like he missed the obvious implications of her reign in the school. The students would part like the red sea whenever she would walk down the halls. He swore that a few have scattered away if she’s in the hands of Dan. In a way, he hated it. He hated high school stereotypes and how typical his own school seemed to be. What made it worse was that his childhood friend was a part of it too. Maybe his life seemed much more typical than he thought.And it was a shame, really, knowing that people go through the same thing he does. But then again, Jason’s a living, breathing example of that.
COURTNEY: I went home with Dan…
DANNY: don't tell me you’ve
DANNY: …
DANNY: you know…
There was a pause, and that was easy enough for Danny to know exactly what was going on. His thumbs began to tap the keyboard frantically, but he was cut off by his phone ringing in his palms.
“Courtney”
There was a picture of her on his screen. It was of her back in preparatory school. She was cloaked by the old uniform, and no matter how much Danny hated the stupid ashy-red and stain-prone white, Courtney looked good in it. Courtney looked good in anything. She had the widest smile, but it was half covered by her hand, which was in the motion of being brought up to her lips because she was eating. He sometimes missed Courtney. Not because she’d changed. But because they don’t seem to hang out much anymore. She seemed to always be busy, with friends, work and school. And he seemed too be busy too. With his own thoughts.“Yeah?” he answered the call. On the other side, he heard a faint sniff and mumble. “C-Can you walk me back home…?” her voice was cracking. Danny swallowed.“Are you still at Dan’s?” his voice was minimal too, and he decided not to ask any questions, even though they were painfully bouncing within his throat, wanting to be let out. “Mhm…” Courtney hummed. “Is his house the one near the park?” he began to slide himself out of bed. “Yeah...we had the grand final’s after party there…” she explained. Danny nodded to himself.“Got it. I’ll be right there.”Danny ended the call. Grabbing his jacket hanging lopsided by his door knob, he swiftly wrapped it around him, shoving his phone into the pockets in the process. He zipped it up as he kicked open the door and rushed downstairs. “Where do you think you’re going?” his mom piped up. The teenager flipped his head over to see her lowering her glasses to her nose to inspect him. She had propped her book down on the counter and crinkled her eyebrows. “It’s late.”“Courtney’s in trouble,” he explained, a little frustrated. He swung his hood over his hair. “Well why don’t you get your Roy to drive you? Don’t you think it’s dangerous to be out at night?” she sipped her mug of tea. "I'm sure he won't mind."“But he’s asleep and he’ll get mad if I wake him up,” he reached towards the door. “I can see the light in his room on,” she moved aside the curtains to let Danny peer through. The room on the second floor had light piercing through the blinds. The view was slightly restricted, but Danny could make out a few things; like his desk filled with paper (most likely scripts), his computer with multiple sticky notes, a makeup bag, and a few props like helmets and fake swords. He sure was a theatre kid. “I-I’ll get Roy. I don’t really know if he would like to…” he twisted the knob and pushed forward.The cold night’s air instantly hit him. He could feel shivers travelling from the back of his neck to his spine. Pinching his collar, he closed the door behind him and rushed over to the next house, which seemed much too far. It was like the air was twisting between the weaved cotton in his trousers. He could feel the hairs on his arms stand up. He exhaled. The coldness did a great job of waking him up, if he wanted to note the positives. He knocked on the door of the strangely-familiar house. He hadn’t gone to his house in years. Last time he did...well...Danny doesn't want to talk about that. Either way, it had been about 3 years since he’s visited, and he had missed the scenery. He had the most stereotypical republican house. Painted pure white; small flowers sprouted in swirling cascades underneath their front windows; silk-like, rich curtains seeping through the window frame; a smooth, perfectly sanded down verandah; a standard, block-like architecture. Danny would love to live in a house like that. He would imagine, when he was older, he would be living in a place just like the one in front of him. Grand and classic. Maybe in the arms of a handsome husband. Maybe in a neighbourhood where they would accept him. And maybe, just maybe, he could truly be happy with who he was.But shit, what the fuck was he thinking? It was probably the mix of the cold night air and his sleepy thoughts throwing him off again. It always seemed like his dreams would get in his way.“Oh hey Danny,” Roy had opened the door, eliminating the air between them. The younger boy flushed at the sight. He had his short hair tossed messily, like he had just woken up, or he was lying around in bed for a while. He was wearing a loose grey tank top, with the thick straps cuffed on his shoulders lopsidedly. Danny could easily pick up on the unshaven stubble around his chin, and he couldn’t tell whether he liked it too much or not. “S-Sorry Roy,” he cleared his throat and nuzzled his chin towards his chest. “I just got a phone call from Courtney and she’s...in trouble. I think.”He hummed and stretched over to his jacket hanging over the coathanger. Putting it on, he dangled the keys tucked within his pockets between his fingers. He teased it in front of Danny’s view before entering into the night as well. “And you want me to drive you?” he asked, shutting the door behind him. “Y-Yeah...I’m really sorry about this…” he trailed after him, the two approaching a BMW parked by the street. “It’s okay,” he unlocked the vehicle and swooped himself into the driver’s seat. “Isn’t she at the party?”“No…” he tightened the seat belt, enough to make himself feel overly secure. “She went home with Dan…”“Oh,” he coughed and started up the car. “Do you think they're bad news?”“What do you mean?” Danny’s nails hooked around the seat belt. “I don’t know. Sometimes I think that they’re all for show, you know? Head cheerleader and quarterback. Seems too picturesque for me,” Danny replied with a nod and a hum.He had never really thought about it deeply. Like the rest of the school, it was almost like he digested it as cold hard truth. Maybe because it was a lot easier to just accept it. Danny wondered if stereotypes exist because it was so much easier to have them around. Less thought, I guess.“Uhh you okay…?” Roy wavered one of his hands in front of him. Danny blinked and shook his head. “...do you know what picturesque means?” they both cackled in unison. Danny slapped his arm playfully and felt his fingers drum along his shoulders. They lingered a little longer than he had intended, and he pondered as if it was awkward or not. “Do you think Courtney’s in major trouble?”“Well...she sounded like she was crying on the phone,” Danny bit down on his lip and tore away his fingertips to stick them into his pockets. “That’s a shame…” he pursed his lips. “We’ve grown up with Court. She had so much potential.”“What do you mean? I thought she was going fine,” he played with the loose ends of his sleeve. Roy let out a sigh.“You’re not in her classes so you don’t understand,” he rubbed his temples, either from growing frustration or due to his half-asleep state. “She can be a little...ditsy. You know?”“I can’t talk. You’re the only smart one out of us three,” Danny said, somewhat seriously, but Roy chuckled anyway.“Either way, she’s easily led. Have you seen her friends?” he rolled his eyes. “I doubt she’ll be “pure” forever.”“Is she starting to drink? Smoke?” Roy shook his head both times. “You know Willam…?” Danny nodded. “Think about her for a second.”Danny never really got to know Willam on a personal level. He had sort of labelled her as “Courtney’s friend” and nothing else. From what he saw, she was pretty slow, in the best way possible. Maybe it was her low, slurring voice. She was funny, but her jokes always seemed to come in at the wrong times. Her style of comedy was...a little dark. But she was a complete joy......after ten shots and a red bull. She seemed much more lively (to say the least) at their weekly get-togethers. Bonfire parties seemed to be much too prevalent within their social structure. Like it was some sort of church, except on Fridays not Sunday. Danny knew that some people swore by the idiotic parities like it was some sort of cult. A drunken, drug-filled, sexed up cult. And maybe that’s why Danny wouldn’t be surprised if Courtney found herself in the crowd, though he would be upset if she was to.“She’s okay…” he mumbled. Roy snarled.“Well she’s known to be…” he ran his fingers through his hair. “...on the other team.”“Oh,” he cleared his throat and glanced away. Danny knew it. Completely. He’s gone to church with him and his family. He knew his upbringings, but he wanted to believe in otherwise. He also knew that he couldn’t change people’s minds easily, but he wished and prayed upon it anyway. “I know a lot of people in our school hate her because of it. A shame, really. She seemed pretty cool,” Danny couldn’t really tell if he kept on talking or not. It turned more muffled and muffled as his chest ached more and more. Stereotypes exist for a reason, like how teenagers over react and are over emotional. And maybe so, but he just wanted to convince Roy that the church may not be the brightest good in the world, so all the pain pulsing through his body would stop. So all the overemotional, angsty pain would stop.
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
The outside world was completely dark. Pitch black. Danny could just make out the houses on either side of the road, and since none of their lights were on, it made the earth look like it was turned off. “Hey, there’s Courtney!” Roy swooped the car over to the side of the road. They both unbuckled their seatbelts and rushed over to her in a hurry. Danny felt his feet sickling into one another as he stumbled towards her. Roy crouched over and placed a hand onto her shoulder, making her peer up. Danny flinched. Her eyes were bloodshot and bright red. Her face seemed heated and swollen, like it was pulsing with pain. Danny could feel her heartbeat, racing and sprinting, the moment he brushed his fingers across her shoulders to her neck. “R-Roy…?” she sniffed and brought the jacket cloaked over her body closer to her. “Danny...you came…”“Of course,” he shook his head and plastered on a concerned face. He tried to hide the shock that seemed to overcome him. “I’m sorry…” she pulled her folded arms over her knees. Roy stood upright and held out a hand. Courtney gladly took it and hopped up. Danny stayed silent. Roy was always a lot better at cheering people up, even though he was often cold and borderline-sociopathic. He guided her over to their car. Danny gladly gave up his front seat to take up the middle seat behind them. Courtney pulled out her phone from her pocket and gave herself a check. She exhaled. Danny knew that she wasn’t happy with the way she looked. She puffed up her hair and rubbed her eyes. Damp tears were still lingering by her waterline, even though she scratched at it with her long, pink-coloured nails. She ran her view towards her lips. Only the lipliner seemed to stay. Wiping it away painfully, she sniffed again and locked her phone. “Is it okay if we do a little bit of a detour?” Roy perked up, rolling down the visor to take a look at Danny. He gave a light wink, and he felt his face heat up uncontrollably. “Sure…” Courtney muttered, moving aside a lock of hair. She cleared her throat and swallowed. She achingly stretched a smile, and Danny could easily pick apart her facade. She was cracking apart in front of him, and he wanted to look away. He really did. But he couldn’t. His vision was glued onto her, like the mixture of guilt, concern and worry was creating a thick paste of discomfort that trapped him. “I don’t mind,” Danny replied. Roy smiled wider. “Good,” he turned the corner hastily, and the other two slammed into the side of the door. They both shrieked. Courtney gasped and grasped onto her seat belt, frantically trying to sit up right. Danny’s hands coiled around the back of the seats as he screamed through the gap. Roy bursted out into laughter. “How the fuck did you get your license?!” Courtney yelled. Danny felt a tickle of a chuckle within his throat. “I swear to god! If you do that again!”Danny couldn’t help it. His cheeks gave up from the pressure. He laughed, louder than he had in awhile. His stomach clenched as he let the swirls of laughter roll out of his tongue. When he wiped away a tear and snorted, he saw both older teenagers look towards him. Courtney seemed a little annoyed, but Roy was enjoying himself. A little too much. “He seemed to like it,” Roy nudged. Courtney combed her fingers through her hair. “I-It’s just her expression!” he cackled, bringing his hand to his lips.Courtney pouted and crossed her arms over her chest. Roy replied with another jab to her upper arm and a smirk. Danny seemed to finally settle into smaller snickers and snorts. It really was like they were young again. Like they were before. When things were simpler.But then, Danny thought about it. Were things ever simple? It seemed as if the mindset that he was given was always there. His neighbourhood was always like that. The other students at his school seemed to act like the same young students at his old schools. Like dicks. And nothing was different. They say that being a child was much easier, but maybe he was never really given a chance to grow up. That was Danny’s excuse anyway, the more that he thought about it.“Here we are,” Roy suddenly stopped the car, making everyone jolt forward. Snickering, he undid the seatbelt and kicked open the door.Courtney and Danny peered outside. At first, he could only make out a fence. It began straight, but the further his eyes travelled, it became more bent, damaged and rusty. Then it hit him. No wonder it was so familiar.“Why are we at school?” Courtney stepped outside of the car. “Because,” Roy ran his hands over his trousers to clean them. “It’s the most refreshing place I know. Or we could go to a church of something,” the two shook their heads frantically. “That’s what I thought.”Roy ran his fingers at the metal fencing. Yanking it up firmly, he created a small gap between the damp soil and jagged wire. “Ladies first,” he gestured over. Courtney rolled her eyes, and crouched over. “Don’t look,” she furrowed her brows, brushing down the miniskirt of her uniform. Roy turned his attention over to Danny, who was slowly wriggling out of the car. He cleared his throat and rushed over behind Courtney. “You go next,” Roy wavered his hand and the younger boy squirmed over to the other side.“Where are we going?” the blonde still had her frustrated look on her face, as she cleaned the dirt off of her uniform. “Just up there,” Roy pointed over to where the hill began to curve upwards towards a somewhat-far-off building. “Hey! That’s where Jason and his group sits,” Courtney enthused. Danny smiled at the familiar name. “I don’t think Danny’s ever been around here before,” Roy joked, taking a seat by the lump of the grassy hill. “Yeah, only for PE,” he shrugged. “You know how Gia hates the outdoors.”“Absolutely,” he slurred her catchphrase jokingly, the familiar nasally voice making his nose twitch. The three laughed together.“What are your thoughts on Jason and his group?” Courtney asked, shimmying her way out of her jacket. She looked towards both the guys, who were easing into much more comfortable positions.“Eh, I think they’re fine. I’m probably the closest to Kurtis. We’ve worked on an English project together,” Roy answered, exhaling into his hands to warm them up. “What about you, Danny?” Courtney fanned her jacket over her knees. “I don’t know most of them…” he forced out a chuckle. “I am a year younger.”“I saw you talking to Jason today at the game,” Courtney grinned. Roy looked over to him and raised an eyebrow. “I met him when…” he gasped. “Oh shit! I forgot your stuff at my house,” he face palmed himself. “My mom probably thinks I’m some…” he swallowed, “Fag,” he spat the word, leaving a bitter aftertaste. “Because I have a girl’s bag in my room,” he rolled his eyes and achingly cleared his throat. It was like a lump of guilt was stuck within his Adam’s apple. “What’s in the bag anyway?”“I’m going to Willam’s house tomorrow so I need to bring some stuff,” she shrugged. Danny hummed. “Is Alaska coming?” Roy asked, his tone a little flat. “Nah, she’s with Sharon that day,” she answered. Danny eyed him oddly, trying to decipher what he’s trying to hint at. His mind linked together Roy’s earlier words, and he felt his body stiffen and his lips press together. He knew what was going to happen next, and his mind began to race for another conversation topic.“You hang out with Willam a lot…” Roy mumbled. Courtney tipped her head to the side.“Well yeah. She’s my best friend,” she shrugged. “What are you trying to say?”“Maybe the people you’re hanging out with is…” Roy brought his hand to cup his chin. “...not the best influence…”“Why?” Courtney basically shrieked. “Alaska and Willam are great! You just don’t know them well.”“I know that Alaska is “friends” with Sharon. Aka the biggest druggo, as you Aussies call it, goth in our school. And we all know that there’s more to that relationship,” he rolled his eyes. “What is that supposed to mean?” she cocked a shoulder and thinned her lips. “I’m saying that she’s--” he gave a long-sufferable sigh. “--she’s a homo.”“Roy you can’t just--!”“I’m not blaming her!” he threw his fist onto the ground. “It’s probably Sharon’s fault! Who knows?!” when Courtney’s bottom lip began to quiver, he gave one more exhale to try and calm his nerves. “...I-I’m sorry Courtney. I didn’t mean to upset you…” “Well yeah, whatever,” she crossed her arms. “...I just don’t want you to turn out like them. Have you seen how they treat Jason?” Roy glanced away.“Maybe it’s because he’s a cheerleader. Aren’t they all rumours?” Courtney looked towards Danny, like she was asking him the question. He replied with a nervous shrug. “N-No...it’s not all rumours,” Danny responded, tucking his chin towards his chest. “See? I don’t want you to be in the same boat as them. They’re good guys, I know, but we’ve seen how harsh some people can be,” Courtney collapsed onto her back and stretched out her arms. She let out a lazy doze, like it was a mixture of annoyance and fatigue exhaling out. “Why does this town suck so much?” she complained, lying onto her side. “It’s not that bad. It’s how the world works. God punishes you if you do the wrong thing. Rules don’t disappear just because you move,” Roy hunched his back and lowered himself onto the grass. “Why does God want to hate…” Danny halted when Roy looked up at him. Maybe it was the angle, but the way his eyes twinkled made him curl up on the inside. “...people...born for the way they are…?” Roy just parted his lips. He didn’t answer. “Why can’t we ever be...happy?”“Don’t be stupid Danny,” he whispered. The younger boy gnawed on his bottom lip. Easing himself down to the ground, he eyed Roy, face to face, as if he couldn’t tell him that he was in pain with actual words. “...as long as we don’t sin. We’ll be happy. We’ll be okay.”“So sinners can never be happy?” Danny had the tiniest tint of hope, though it was dimming quickly. Roy shook his head, but it seemed a tad harrowing for him too. “Maybe not…” he muttered, his voice ever so quiet. “...I hope they can be…”There was a moment of silence. Or moments. Danny couldn’t tell anymore. Every moment was either going too quickly or too slowly. Danny couldn’t tell if it was timeless or an eternity. He was too caught up on Roy’s words. Roy seemed to be the only one who says the right things out of the three. It was always like that when they were younger. So he must be right again. Right?Sins are there for a reason, from what he learnt. He was told that it was wrong, so it must be wrong. Why would people lie to him? Was the world that complicated to begin with? People didn’t bully people like Jas--him-- for no reason. Right?“But hey…” Courtney began, piercing through the thick air. “I’ll be nice to anyone who’s like that. They’re born that way. And I want to make them happy.”“Me too,” Danny turned around and exchanged smiles with her. “I’ll try my best,” Roy settled into a grin. Courtney gasped and giggled. “I knew you had it in you,” the blonde smiled. Roy felt a smile widen too. “Well if I was to be friends with anyone who is, I don’t want to ruin our friendship,” he explained. He looked over to Danny, and the younger boy couldn’t decipher whether he was hinting towards him or it was an invite for him to speak up. “Me too,” a faint smile was now appearing by his lips. Roy had now taken his eyes off of him and now towards the stars. And though Danny could make out the few specks of light behind him, he disregarded it as another trail to lead him towards Roy. His expression was much calmer now, probably because the fighting was over, and there was a sweeter note playing. It felt serene. Calm. Right.And of course Danny was glad that it was over too, but he was even happier to see Roy so adequate. It’s just his face...it always made him feel better. He could feel the cool grass waver beneath him, giving him a rush of relief and comfort. He couldn’t decide on whether it was the moon; luring him, seducing him like some sort of high; or his unwanted feelings for Roy, which made him feel all the more complete. Either way, he didn’t want his dopamine burst to ever go out. It was him, Roy and Courtney. Together again. Like they were young again. Danny scrunched up his fingers through the thick, overgrown grass and then exhaled, releasing his grip and the tension building within his spine. His eyes guided up towards the stars, looking ever so bright and ever so dream-like. But maybe the thought of Roy accepting him, was like a dream in a way.
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
Danny felt a rush of coolness bullet down his neck. Slamming the door behind him, he pressed his back against the smooth wooden surface of his bedroom. It seemed as if a couple of hours had passed by the time he blinked. Tossing his jacket aside by his chair, he gave a long, satisfying exhale as he eased himself into his bed. He pondered if his body looked as if it had been bathed in grass and dirt, but after a millisecond, he realised he didn’t care. Not even a tiny bit. What was on his mind though, was Courtney. He honestly couldn’t stop thinking about what had happened. The two of them have been friends for years. He’s not going to lie, he’s seen her upset before. A few times actually. But nothing like this.She’s never asked him to come and pick her up. Nor has she ever cried over the phone. And it makes him think. Makes him worry. About what really happened to her. Dan wasn’t known to be too much of a dick. Sure he’s the quarterback but he’s no asshole, from what Danny's picked up. He can be a little soft spoken at times and a little bit of a goofball. Danny would never describe him as an aggressive person. He also thought about Willam and their relationship. It seemed so far fetched that Courtney would be...well...like him. Maybe it was because Danny thought it was only him. He was the only like him around here. He didn’t realise that it wasn’t so rare after all. Shaking his head he snapped his attention over to the clock. 4:00AM. He hadn’t realised how carried away they had gotten. Who knew that he would be sneaking into his own school of all places? He sighed to himself, the warm air bouncing between his body and the covers. Though his body was tired, his mind was wideawake. His eyes began to shift down lower towards his bedside table. There were a couple of textbooks he had to painfully take home from school. An empty coke can, with a prominent dent by the torso. A lamp, the shades a little torn from his not-so-delicate touch (he knew how reckless he could be). And...well...a mood ring. He was surprised that he had left it lying there, especially because he hadn’t touched it since...well he doesn't really remember. Maybe sometime when he was cleaning out his things. He got it when Courtney had snuck into his room. Years and years and years ago. Danny dubbed those days as “The Worst Holiday of His Life”. Courtney had gone with her family back to Australia for a few weeks, keeping him quite lonely in terms of talking buddies. Sure, Roy was around, but he liked to hang out with some of the older boys and Danny couldn’t blame him.But because of that, he stayed inside for most of his days. He would play his video games and draw until...well he never seemed to stop. He just let his imagination flow. He even started to write a few thoughts down, wondering if he should start writing stories or songs. But his isolation would also lead his mother to worry about him. He wished that he would have retaliated, looking back, but he didn’t. He loved his mom. A lot. So he just swallowed and did as instructed.She suggested the park to see a few of the kids around the area, and he just nodded. He figured that it seemed pretty stiff, but either his mom didn't notice or she ignored it. He really hated the kids. A lot. He sometimes wished he could go elsewhere. Maybe far, far away with his mom, taking Roy and Courtney with him. But of course reality kicked in. And it had other plans for him. He had brought along his sketchbook to draw while he was there. He wanted to finish off his latest artwork, and he figured, maybe being outside wasn’t so bad. Well, that’s what he thought at the time anyway, when he was trying to be more optimistic. He couldn't be any more wrong. He had found a comfortable spot by a bench. It was far from the playground, meaning he could be partially hidden, but close enough to count as “being in the park”. He was technically there. Danny remembers opening up his book and grabbing his pencil from his pocket. He had started to trace around his character’s hair, making it a tiny bit longer than before. He could feel his cheeks rising into a smile as he gave a glance around and continued.
“What a fag!”
But he also remembers his smile disappearing. Wiped away in a second. He could still hear the painful teasing, and the shadows crowding around him. It seemed all too vivid. Danny still knew these kids. All too well. He still sees glimpses of them in the hallways and at lunch and he still cowards away. They looked just like they do now, just shorter, younger and more tame. The words still hurt him like a bitch. But that was only the beginning. One of them had slapped the notebook. He can still see it. The way it toppled onto the ground. The way his character was dulled with dirt. The way they were laughing. It echoed through his ears. Night after night.One had pulled on his hair, and it was if his locks were wheezing away, snapping loose as he scattered away. The young Danny glanced up at them, his view fogged with tears. He wondered why. Why they would do this. Why they wouldn’t leave him alone, but no matter how many times he had asked, it was the same answer.
“Because you’re a sinner”
And it would shut him up every time. He remembers slipping beneath their stances, swiftly snatching his book off of the ground. He could feel his knees buckling as he bolted away. Not looking back. Not because they were chasing after him. Not because they were screaming at him; that had died away the further he ran. But because Roy was there to see everything, and he did absolutely nothing.He had watched. Just stood there. Probably in the middle of some hide and seek round. They were 8 after all. So what more did he expect? What more does he expect now? Maybe nothing has changed. Danny snickered. Roy used to look so cute when he was younger. He had a small, circular face. His dimples used to be as evident as ever. He’d always had the most perfect teeth, which Danny used to be so envious of. As he grew up, he just learnt to admire them. But his smile was quickly wiped off. He remembers sneaking into his house, ever so quietly so his mom wouldn’t realise. He rushed into his room, closed the door gently and just bursted into tears. Right then and there. The muffled sound of his palms still felt somewhat familiar to this day.He had collapsed onto his side, his fingers scrunching up the carpet of his rug. Popping earphones into his ears, he drowned out the outside world. He remembers closing his eyes, tears leaking as he crinkled them shut. The sound would pulse through his body as he curled up tighter and bit down on his lip. Maybe enough to draw out blood. But he didn’t care. He didn’t care about anything at that point. At all.
“Danny! Danny! Open up!”
He had just heard the faintest shouting. He hurried up and pulled aside his IPod to glance up. Courtney was by his verandah, banging her fist against the doorframe. The younger boy raised his eyebrow and rushed over to unlock it.“Geez Danny! I was waiting out there for hours!" She bursted through the door and tumbled onto the ground. "Wait, hey, are you okay?” glancing up at him, she gave a loud gasp and cupped his cheeks. “Oh my god! You look like you’ve been crying for days!”“Well…” he sniffed. “Feels like it…”“Oh no!” she cried. Stretching out her sleeve, she wiped away his still lingering tears. “What happened?”“Brad and them…” he pouted, sitting down by his bed to then cross his legs. Courtney took a spot next to him and stroked his arm. “Don’t listen to them. They’re a bunch of--” she halted and pondered for a word. “U-Um, dumbos! That’s it! Some stupid hobos! Stupid bogons! Some dipsticks, I say.”“I-I didn’t understand half the things you just said,” Danny blinked. Courtney puffed her cheeks and gave a long sigh. “You’ve been in Australia for too long.”She gave a chuckle and pressed her lips together.“Danny, promise me something,” she interlocked their fingers. Danny peered up at her and tipped his head to the side. “Don’t fight back. You’re just as bad if you start hurting them too,” she said, her voice a little lower. Danny thought about it for a second. “I’ll protect you. But you need to also learn to be strong, okay?”“Okay Court,” he tried to grin. The blonde smiled wider.“Good!” before Danny could reply with a stretch of his lips, she suddenly gasped again. “Wait!” she wiggled her fingers in front of his face. On her index finger was a small ring. It’s colours were a gradient, ranging from a light cyan to a deeper green. “It’s a mood ring! We got it when we went to Bathurst.”“What does it do?” he stared at the shining colours. As she put in down to her lap, it proceeded to deepen and shift over to a much warmer tone of green. “It changes with mood!” she beamed. “It was a blue before. Because I missed you and Roy and all. But now it’s a green! Because I’m happy!” she jiggled her finger and slipped off the ring. “You try it.”“Umm…” he accepted it and proceeded to slither it onto one of his fingers. He waited excitedly to turn into a warmer hue. He was hoping for a violet or purple. Maybe a cute pink or fuschia. Or maybe something completely different. Fresh. Like teal or aqua. But it didn’t happen. It dulled and dulled and kept on dulling. To the disappointment of Courtney. It turned to an ashy green, then to a grey then to a black. A deep black. Danny’s bottom lip began to quiver. “No wait!” Courtney snatched it off of him and hid in into her pocket. “I-it’s probably just cold. It does that for everyone. I sw--”“It’s okay,” he cut her off. “Mood rings never work on me…”“Don’t say that Danny…” she stroked his knee. “Get your tickets now, it’s free,” he said sarcastically, dropping his head onto his hand. “You know how children always lose to tease,” he gave a long exhale and tried to hold in his tears. “...I’m not surprised if mood rings hate me too. I am "Sad Boy" after all.”“Well I don’t hate you!” she shuffled closer and hugged him tightly. Danny, to this day, remembers how she squeezed him warmingly. Sometimes he wondered if she was the only one there for him. “You know what? When we go to middle school, a-and then high school, I’m going to become super super popular! You know why?”“Why?” he peered up at her with glassy eyes. “Because then I can rule the school. And I can finally tell them to back off,” she held him tighter. “I’ll promise you, that nothing will hurt you when that comes.”Now, he would chuckle. Looking back, he found it borderline funny that they were so hopeful. Of course it was a lie. Of course it was wishful thinking. But at the time he believed it. Completely. With his whole heart. Like it was some religion. Maybe because he had to believe it. It was sort of like a last hope for him. The last option. There were no more guiding lights to help him. No more hints. He was nearly out of lives. “Courtney,” the younger him gazed up at her with the most thankful expression he could ever muster up. “Thank you! You’re my very best friend!”That didn’t change however. No matter who he sat with, no matter how old he was, Courtney was always there for him, and he knew that he would never grow apart from her. Or he would fight for the position of her closest spot. Maybe, in a way, he alienated himself from Willam because of that reason. Because she was now Courtney's best friend. But in Danny's heart, he knew better. He knew the truth behind their friendship, which seemed covered by time. But it still seemed crystal clear to him.
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
“Okay, but what about Kandy?”
Danny really didn't expected this to happen. Ever. He really thought that hanging out with the seniors was a one time thing. He thought Jason was a one time thing. Of course he had hung out with Courtney and Roy, but never during school. He thought he was trapped, like he was strapped to some electric chair, as the third wheel for Gia and Jay. He didn't hate them or anything like that. They'd shared the same class for a few consecutive years, along with houses fairly close to each other, so he'd grown to their company after a while. But, did they get too much at times? Yes. And were they too lovey dovey for his liking? Absolutely. But maybe it was good to get away. They didn't seem to mind too much. Gia just replied with a shrug and a nod. She nudged him on with her signature high, nasally voice and patted him on the back (though he would describe it as more of a slap). Jay was a little taken back. He gave a little gasp, but covered it with a smack of his lips. Maybe it was his way to try and not offend Danny, but the shorter boy couldn't help to chuckle at the obvious envy behind his forced smile.
“Eh, she's okay. I've done a project with her,”
The school’s field felt much more lively during the day. The emerald green hue spread beneath him like an ocean, like its the crashing waves were foaming by his feet. But of course he lived in a strict, homey area. Miles and miles away from any sign of the sea. No sight of anything remotely crystal blue. Except for the little packet of blue meth found every month in some student’s locker. The more Danny stared at the grass, however, the more he saw the twinkling droplets of water, still hanging onto a single lock of freshly trimmed stem. Maybe that's what the school spent their budget on, taking it away from the actual education, PE equipment, and canteen supplies. “What about you Danny?” When the youngest member snapped back into reality. He found four sets of eyes looking towards him intently. “Do you hate anyone in your grade?”Jason had nudged him, using the long sleeve of the leather jacket to hit him lightly on the forearm. He adjusted the thick black fabric wrapped around his shoulders to fit his body better. Most likely to shift Matt a little closer to him. “Not really,” he shrugged. “Not really into hating a particular person.”“See that's more like it,” the tallest of the group pointed over to him, nodding confidently. He flicked his silver locks out of his eyes and let out a hum. “See Kurtis? Not everyone’s as bitter as you are.”“Oh shut up Max,” one of the other brunettes crossed his arms across his chest and pouted. “Maybe Danny’s in a better batch then we are.”
‘Well you’ve got that right’
Danny’s mind instantly went towards Brad and his friends. For someone in the football team, Matt didn't seem nearly as jerkish as the others. Or aggressive. Or...attentive…? He was nice, of course. He had a constant smile by his lips, but Danny couldn't deny how…’out of it’ he seemed nearly...well constantly. It started off somewhat cute, but it progressed to something a little odd. Maybe he'd gotten baked so much that he's permanently burnt or something. “I'm more into hating my whole grade actually,” Danny interjected. He felt his lip curl up as Jason snorted and bursted out into laughter. “Ha! See!” Kurtis clapped his hands and pointed towards Max. Jabbing his pointer finger by his chest, Danny couldn't help but to chuckle. The taller boy swatted his hand away and crinkled his brows. “Everyone's hateful. "Just not you". Because you're a liar.”“Am not. I just prefer to live life optimistically,” he said, his accent short, prim and proper. Very articulate. Probably on the other side of the spectrum from Danny. “That means “happy thoughts”, for you Matt, just in case you didn't understand,” Kurtis teased, snorting as he drummed his fingers over the football player’s shoulder. He returned with a glare, though he melted into a chuckle soon after. “That's probably what you were thinking after you got your last haircut,” Jason poked his head to the side and cocked his neck sassily. Max gave a round of applause as he fell into a fit of laughter. “You can't talk. You can't even pass as a closeted, you twink,” he dug, his hazel eyes going off of Jason to pass over to Danny. “So, you and Roy. Tell me about that. Should probably change the topic before football player over here punches me.”“W-What?” he widened his eyes, the words barely crawling through. He was genuinely speechless for a second, but the others took it as a joke, and was quick to laugh it off. “I've worked on stuff with him. Every single time some song came on, boom. Bam. Your name would come up,” he explained, an excited smirk appearing by his lips. “Oh ‘Danny’s super into that song’ or ‘I saw Danny perform this at our Christmas neighbourhood gathering’,” he flushed a little redder as Kurtis continued. “There has to be something, right? Plus, no theatre kid is straight. I refuse to believe it.”“Pretty religious though,” Danny shrugged stiffly. “I was talking to him last night,” the whole group began to cat-call and whale jokingly. Jason poked his shoulder with his knuckle. “N-No we were just hanging out with Court,” he shook his head. “Anyway we were talking and...yeah, he wants to sort of stop being homophobic. But you know. Can't.”“He’ll grow out of it. We all did,” Kurtis grinned towards him. Jason replied with a confident smile, alongside Matt, who was snuggled against his shoulder. Max gave a small glance over to him and stretched out a minimal smile. Small enough for Danny to wonder if he had even expressed anything at all. “You should convince him before it’s too late,” Matt sighed, the smile disappearing a tad. Jason peered up at him, his lips parting in worry. Cupping his cheeks, he gave gentle strokes down his cheekbones. Danny felt both happy and uncomfortable. Maybe it was the religious beatings getting the better of him. Matt replied with a quiet giggle, and embraced him back. He ran his fingers through his tousled hair, receiving an ease of a smile from his partner. He nuzzled the tip of his nose again his neck down to his collarbone, chuckling and giggling together as Matt brought him into a closer hug.Danny couldn't decipher whether he was slightly jealous or flustered with discomfort. Seeing two gay men so happy in front of him made him feel slightly envious. Maybe he wanted to be that way too. Confident. Comfortable. Not single...“They get more and more close minded as they age,” Max said in a low voice, shaking his head quickly to snap into a lighter mood. Stretching out a smile, he snickered. “Anyways, what do we have next period?”Danny could pick up on the sudden mood change, and he knew he wasn't the only one. Matt glanced away, looking towards Danny for a quick second to see if he had understood too. Jason had just forced out an “umm” as if he was pondering for an answer to his question. Kurtis was already scrolling through his photostream to find his timetable. “Uhh English,” he answered. Everyone immediately groaned. “Are you serious? I swear we have English way too often,” Jason rolled his eyes. “Tell me about it. If Miss Purvis slaps me for falling asleep again, I swear to god,” Matt laughed. “Well maybe you shouldn't fall asleep in class…?” Max teased, snorting. “You can't blame me! She makes us listen to an audio book!” He cried, pouting. “What kind of teacher does that? All new levels of “not giving a shit” if you ask me.”“Not like you would do anything in English to begin with,” Jason playfully made fun of him. Matt gasped over dramatically and slapped his arm. "Fine, I'll take this back then," he frowned and snatched away his leather jacket. Putting it on swiftly, Jason pouted and hugged his forearm anyway. Danny smiled to himself. They were so genuine. Real. And yet friendly. It made him happy; that there weren't just fake, rude, judgemental people in the world. But then it made him think. He couldn't understand why people would hate them. Sure, he could probably pick out flaws after a while, but just from being gay. Just for them being them. He could be mad at himself forever, but he knew he couldn't be mad at them forever. They seemed too...innocent. Like they didn't deserve it. And what happened to Jason...well, no one deserved that.
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
Danny shifted his position within the uncomfortable seat. He swore it had been hours in the office, but they still didn't let him go. Time was ticking a lot slower than he had hoped. The silence. The isolation. The awkward nature of it all. It was making him uncomfortable and it was getting to him. He swore he was going insane. He was just waiting for printouts for the teacher. He betted that she was going to get mad at him for stalling, and he was willing to face it. As long as he got to slip out of this awkward encounter quicker.
“Goodbye Mr Dardo”
The senior completely ignored the principal's call and closed the door behind him. Not looking back. He groaned into his hand and dragged his legs behind him as he made his way towards the exit. “Jason?” Danny widened his eyes. “O-Oh hey Danny,” he rubbed the back of his neck. He parted his lips to talk, but was soon cut off. “Mr Noriega? Your papers have printed,” the office lady handed him the pile. Bowing his head, he accepted the sheets and made his way out by Jason’s side. “Why were you in there?” Danny asked, holding the pile close to his chest. “Fucking Brad told on me,” he rolled his eyes, but grew his smile into a chuckle. “That sounded childish.”“What did you do?” they made their way down the empty hallway.“I was in the girl’s locker room and I decided to get changed with the other cheerleaders,” Jason explained. Danny snorted. His cheeks puffed with held in laughter. The senior glared at him. “What?”“So you’re telling me that you gave up looking at shirtless men to see girls?” he chortled. “That day will never come,” he snickered. “I was just trying to avoid...Brad..and all,” Danny grew quiet. “I’m just sick of him. I’m sick of him picking on me. I’m sick of seeing him. I’m just sick of living in a world where he exists.”“Trust me, I get it,” he sighed. “He lives near me and I had to put up with him since I was born.”"Argh that sucks," he rolled his eyes. "He's such a dick," he ran his hand through his gelled back hair. “What are his parents like anyway?” he questioned. The younger boy eyed him somewhat oddly. Danny had never really thought about it. Sure, he’d known Brad for a while, but he never seemed to dig deeper into his own lifestyle. He was never really close enough to ever meet them properly. Only a few times at neighbourhood gatherings and church.“I don’t really know…” he answered. “Never really thought about it...all I know is that his dad is a priest. I used to see him a lot when I was younger. Never met his mom. Why?”“Because, kids are products of the environment around them," he shrugged. "We’re the results of what we’re exposed to. Maybe he’s a dick because his parents are dicks. You never know,” he said nonchalantly.“Well that says a lot about why I’m a fag,” Danny tried to sound like he was joking, but he came off overly stiff. It made Jason worry, right off the bat. “First of all, that’s to do with DNA. Second of all, what do you mean?” he tucked his hands into his pockets and raised an eyebrow. “My dad left my mom pretty early on. “No dad boy”, is what Brad liked to tease me as when we were younger,” he exhaled. “Doesn't bother me too much. He would’ve probably hated me for the way I am now anyway.”“You know what Danny?” Jason slurred with a cheerier tone. “I have a good friend who goes to this school, Tatianna. And you know what she said?”“Oh! She’s a cheerleader, right? What about her?” he asked, his voice honeyed. “She told me a great quote that’s stuck with me, and I hope it sticks with you. “Why would I spend time trying to make the people who hate me like me, when I’m too busy loving the people who love me”. And I couldn’t agree more. She’s pretty smart for an airhead,” he chuckled. And just like Jason hoped, it stuck to him. It made so much sense to Danny at the time and he went over it within his head. Over and over and over. Until he could properly digest it and grin. “Those were pretty amazing words,” he breathed out. Jason beamed. “I know right. I think she accidentally became a gay icon,” he cackled. Danny pressed his lips together.“Well, I’m pretty sure that the bell will go soon and--” It rang like it was on queue. Absolutely amazing timing. Enough for the two of them to start laughing. Danny excused himself to his own classroom, slamming down the papers by the nearest desk, and slipping past the teacher to get his bag. Dashing outside, he met up with Jason and they both exited the school. “So how do you get home?” Jason asked, as schoolmates began to pour into the once-empty hallway.“I live around the area, so like a 5 minute walk,” he shrugged. “What about you?”“I go home with the rest of the group. Well, except Matt. He goes home with his very republican dad,” he rolled his eyes. “He’s someone who’s nothing like his parents.”“Have you met them?” both of his brows were raised. “Yeah, a few times actually. Mostly at assemblies though. I swear they glare at me sometimes,” Jason rolled his eyes. “Wait do they know about you two?” Danny tried to contain a gasp. Jason laughed at his shock, finding it rather amusing. “Nah, but I think they “pick up the gay” from me. I can never pass as being straight,” he cackled. They descended the staircase of their main doorway. Both of them could easily spot Kurtis’s car. Maybe it was because he had his window rolled down with his elbow sticking out and the largest smirk on his lips. How he got out quickly was beyond their knowledge. Or maybe, it was because he was one of the only kids rich and spoilt enough to afford a BMW X1. “He’s a child of a former farmer. Sometimes I wonder how he’s so lucky or rich,” Jason muttered over to Danny, who snickered to himself. “Hey Danny,” Max was the first to wave, poking his head to the side to reveal him in the passenger seat. “You need a ride?” Kurtis flicked up his sunglasses to hang by his bangs. Danny shook his head.“Nah, I can walk home in 5 minutes,” he gestured. Kurtis smirked.“And you get to walk home with Roy. Cute,” he gave a smug expression.“When someone who’s younger gets more action than you,” Jason teased, swinging open the door to take a step inside of the car. Max snorted and brought his hand to his lips. Kurtis rolled his eyes.“I will throw you out of the car Dardo,” he started up the vehicle and let it roar. Danny snickered at his "show-off" nature. “See ya Danny.”“Bye Danny!” Jason’s call was dimmed out by Kurtis’s sudden acceleration forward. He took the phrase “floor it” to a whole new level. He took it literally. Maybe too literally from the way Max screamed at the top of his lungs. Danny chuckled and ran his fingers through his hair. Flipping himself around, he made his way down the pathway and descended to his usual route home. He smiled to himself. It was an oddly satisfying day. He would call it a success. He chortled at the thought of Kurtis’s car. Sure, the area he lived in wasn’t bad. It was pretty well off. But it was nothing compared to the coast. Danny imagined the coast as much more beautiful, creative and rich. And he wasn’t wrong either. Seeing the same old, block-like white buildings in his neighbourhood did get boring after a while. Kurtis probably had the most expensive car out of anyone here. But Danny thought otherwise the moment his eyes went over to the end of the street. A Lexus RX 350?!How had he missed all these expensive cars for all these years?!He had greatly underestimated the worth of the other children's pocket money. After years and years of interest in cars (or more like interest in Roy who was interested in cars), he knew the reputation of the Lexus RX 350. Probably one of the most expensive cars...well, ever. For at least around the area anyway.It was somehow still polished, meaning it was either new, it was owned by perfectionists or they had maids to look after their belongings. And that’s worth a hell of a lot of money
“Sorry for being late,”
Now looking back on Jason’s words, he seemed completely correct. It was none other than Matt who had slipped into the passenger seat of the car. He really did fit the image. Really was like a classic, all American family. He was a good-looking, young man. Had strong features and the bluest eyes. He was a football player, and he was good enough to score a couple of goals (or whatever...Danny doesn't play sport). He had a rich family. His parents were still together. He was privileged enough to have the best car in the neighbourhood. He had a picture-perfect family. He was the picture-perfect child. On the outside anyway. Even his parents didn’t know the real truth. But Danny did, and it made him feel pretty accomplished. Like, wow, he knew something that his own family didn’t know. And he was comfortable around him too. Now that’s something.Matt and his dad had a minimal chat. Danny could tell right away that he was uncomfortable. He had his back straightened and his eyes crinkled. He didn’t seem like the happy but calm self he was whenever Danny saw him. He finally got what Jason was hinting at earlier.His gaze went over to his father, who slotted himself well into their picturesque family. He shared the same coloured eyes. His blond locks were gelled back, somewhat like his, but more to the side than the back. He had a smizzle of peach fuzz across his strong jawline. Danny couldn’t tell if he was oddly attracted to him or he was just staring too long. Or maybe he was just seduced by his money. Who knows?They had driven off past him, borderline speeding, but all Danny could focus on was the rumbling noise. Young Roy would have gone nuts for that sound. He was such a typical child. But Danny couldn’t help but to have feelings for him anyway back then. He knows that it was pathetic, and it still is, but he couldn’t seem to get over it. To this day. He still chuckles at the thought of the younger Roy. He misses him a little.“Oh hey Danny!” he turned around to see Courtney dashing over to him. Shaking his head, he returned to his track, Courtney now by his side. She had a wide smile by her lips, and it made him feel somewhat nostalgic.“Hey Court,” he smiled. “Ready to head home?”“Am I?" she chuckled. "Argh, I need to tell you the gos between Kennedy and Ginger. You have no idea what I just heard!”Danny felt a good mixture within his chest. A mixture of pleasant nostalgia and fresh, new beginnings. It was nice to have both new encounters but still feel the familiar feeling. Today was definitely a success. He smiled towards the blonde and excitedly listened to her new set of information, retrieved because...well, she’s head cheerleader after all.
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
Courtney looked much too nostalgic for him. She had her forehead pressed up against the doorframe and she was knocking on it drowsily. Bags were underneath her usual bright blue eyes. Her signature curled hair seemed to weigh down on her head, making her gaze down sadly. It somewhat reminded him of that day. The day he began to hate mood rings. Danny immediately rushed over to the entrance and pushed it open. The cold night air screamed into his room, making it instantly wintery. Courtney shivered in and basically collapsed into his embrace.“W-What are you doing here?” Danny wrapped his arm around her shoulder and guided her over to his bed. She was trembling within his grasp.“I need to talk to you,” she mumbled, exhaling into her hands to warm them up. “Why now? You could’ve texted me, o-or told me in the morning. Your parents are probably worried. I'm fucking worried,” he cloaked her with his blankets and rubbed his hands over the sides to smooth them out. Courtney parted her lips slightly to speak, but she instead piped out a small exhale.“I’ll let you get warm first, and then maybe I should take you home.”“Please don’t…” she plotted her head onto Danny’s shoulder, pulling his arm around her tighter. He peered down at her with confusion, but he didn’t hesitate to bring her in close to his chest. “What do you want to tell me?” he muttered into her blonde locks. “I've been thinking a lot recently...like I never really thought about it until a few days ago..." she tapped her fingers along the sheets. "...I think there’s something wrong with me…” she whispered. Danny furrowed his brows and scanned her. She had her cheek gently running along the fabric of his tank top. Her lips were slightly parted, like she was on the verge of hyperventilating. Tears were slowly forming by her eyes, which were already puffed and bloodshot. He ran his thumb down her cheekbones, trying to soothe her and slow down her breathing. She didn't seem to respond.“I don’t think there’s anything wrong with you,” he tried to reassure, his voice quiet. She shook her head. “You don’t know me properly…” she breathed. “I know you better than anyone else,” he had a honeyed voice, maybe because he really was unsure, no matter how much he didn't wanted to be. He wanted to be there for Courtney. He wanted to be the support she needed when she yearned for it, but he knew he might not be. Probably because he wasn’t even strong enough to support himself most of the time. “Hey, you know what?”“What?” Courtney gazed up at him, a tint of desperation for something, anything, safe and reassure sounding. Danny swallowed.“I think there’s something wrong with me too,” he patted her back. Courtney pursed her lips.“I doubt it’s not as bad as mine,” she exhaled, glancing away. “Trust me, sometimes I feel like it’s the worst thing ever. People make it out to be a lot worse than it actually is,” he murmured. The blonde pressed her palm against his chest. He placed his hand on top, clutching onto them tightly. “I think..." he muttered under his breath, hoping it was quiet enough for her to not notice. She had most likely ignored. "What if we say them at the same time, huh? Will that be easier?”She replied with a small nod. Chewing his bottom lip, he gulped one more time before they exchanged looks of uncomfort and nerves. Whatever Courtney was going to say, it didn’t matter to him. What mattered more, was that he was finally admitting it. Sure, Jason and all of them know about it now, but he doesn't recall ever saying it out loud. It was more like them speculating, Danny resisting, and them just bursting out into rejoice. He didn’t count that as a confession. He still hadn't climbed over that wall."On 3, okay?” she nodded again. “1…” he emanated a shaky gasp. “2…” he felt Courtney grip onto him tighter. “3…”
“I’m gay.”
They both widened their eyes. Courtney flinched away, her brows raised and breath hitched. She looked...scared. Plain and simple. Danny felt his own hands tremble and shiver, unlike the rest of his body, which was frozen like thick ice. It was an odd feeling. He felt looser after his burst of honesty, but Courtney looking at him like that...made him feel too loose. Too empty.“W-What?” Courtney choked out, as if her throat was parched and her words were dragging up painfully like blades. She looked hurt. Broken. Really frightened. A little shocked. Just like him. Courtney...being like him…? Sinning with him? Never thought so in a million years. She was just too...too. Perfect. She was a blonde. She was the head cheerleader. She was popular, enough to make people pray for her status. She was pretty, so pretty that people would die for her looks. Bouncy curls, full lips, bright blue eyes, soft features and an always-bikini-ready body. She was just a human Barbie. Sure, she was ditzy at times, but she passed. Her family was picture perfect. She had flowers growing by the front of her house, like some sort of happy Mormon household. Her parents were the typical, happy-go-lucky, always smiling family. Danny swore he had never seen their lips curl down. But there she was. Right in front of him. As a sinner. Just like him. “H-How do you know…?” he mumbled, still gobsmacked. It was clearly shown on his face too. Courtney shuffled further away. There was a pregnant pause. Danny just let her breathe for a second, figuring that she needed to wrap her head around everything. Maybe multiple times for her to properly digest it.“I thought you would be the only one who would never say that,” her voice quivered. Her shoulders sagged in front of her as she hunched over her lap. “I...I thought you would understand.”Danny gazed towards her, feeling a mixture of regret, guilt and an overwhelming amount of skittishness. Her eyes never seemed to meet his, as if her view was constantly bouncing off of the walls and around the room. “I do understand,” he moved closer. Courtney balked, her bottom lip jolting out. “I’m just…” he shook his head to clear his thoughts from fear which seemed to fog his train of thought. “Confused...I guess. I-I thought you were happy with Dan.”“I-I am…” she rubbed her hand across her other arm. “...I was...sort of…” “I’m just so…” he bemoaned and rubbed his temples. “...I can’t wrap my head around it...really…”“Why? You just said you’re…” she skipped the word, and instead, coughed as if she was clearing her throat. “And so I thought...you would…”“But you said you would be fine if your friend was to ever be…” Danny halted and rubbed the back of his neck. “Homo…”“Well I never said I wanted to be one!” she cried. The younger boy threw himself over to her, his palm cupping over her lips. “Shoosh,” he snapped. “You’re going to be dragged home if you scream anything again.”“I just…” she took a quick inhale. “I never thought of the other factors. My mind never went to the backlash of it, you know?”Danny could easily pick up that Courtney was trying to curve around the answer, making it as vague as possible. It was like she threw a misty cloak over it, hoping to swat away pressure and uneasiness. But of course it wasn't working. Danny could see right through it.“It’s your parents...isn’t it?” when Courtney didn’t reply, it was if Danny had fanned away the turbulent air. He pressed his lips together. “It’s just--!” she threw her fist onto the mattress suddenly, making Danny jump in shock. “I’m not supposed to be like this! I couldn’t care less if you, Jason or Matt was like...like me!” she violently jolted away and gripped onto the side of the bed. “But I’m not supposed to be like this! My parents are strong Christians, I-I’m a cheerleader...I’m supposed to get with the quarterback and grow up to raise a picture-perfect family...this isn’t me. M-My life isn’t meant to be like this…”“Courtney,” he said firmly, gripping strongly around her wrist. “Stop,” his voice was slowly but surely becoming sharper and sharper. "You need to breathe..."Courtney finally looked over to him. And it was like the last straw for her. All the small cracks were getting gradually larger and large until, well, it just ripped her apart. It began with small sniffs, but she was quick to break down. Completely. Like she was unravelling right in front of him. She sobbed into his shoulder, her cries muffled by the fabric of his shirt. He ran his fingers through the ends of her hair, down to her back. Her body was trembling and shaking within his grasp, and Danny's mind began to race instantly.“W-When you picked me up the other day…” she began, her voice jittering. “Dan and I...well…” she glanced away. “...did it…”“Consensual, right?” Danny interrupted, his voice worried. She nodded.“...but...I just didn’t…” she flushed a pastel pink. “Like it…? I figured at first that it was just me...being upset. But then, I hung out with Willam,” Danny’s mouth hung open. “...I just couldn’t help but to--”“You didn’t do anything with her? Did you?” he snapped, his words tumbling out. It was like his initial, brotherly instinct kicked in. “N-No! Just…” she crossed her arms. “Urges…” she slapped herself on the forehead. “...that sounds so dumb. Argh, just. Just forget it. I think it’s just all the pressure getting to me. More work, more pressure,” she rolled her eyes and blinked away lingering tears. “Sorry about coming here and--”“Thank you,” he exhaled. The blonde blinked her eyes a few times, both to flick away her droplets and from confusion. “For telling me,” Courtney had plain confusion staining her face. “I honestly felt so alone..." he confessed. "I...I needed to hear it from a friend. A close friend. My best friend.”“No worries…?” she was genuinely caught off guard. Danny brought his arms up around her neck and pulled her in tightly. She could feel his heartbeat, beating much quicker than she could keep up with.“I know what it feels like. To hate the way you are...and have everyone else hate the way you are but…” he held her tighter. “It just means so much to me that you told me.”“Haven't you told anyone?” she asked. Danny shook his head. “No. You’re the first,” he admitted. “And thank god for it. What would I do if I didn’t tell my best friend?”“Y-Yeah…” she mumbled, her state still offbeat. Danny exhaled.“I know you’re overwhelmed…I’m still like that too,” he pursed his lips. “But hey, you know what?”“What?” she sniffed. Danny chuckled and grabbed the end of his shirt. Wiping away her tears, he scooped up the droplets and drew out a smile. Courtney peered up at him, trying to stretch out a grin too.“Someone that I know very well told me great advice a while ago,” he grinned wider. “She told me that she would protect me as we got older,” Courtney’s eyes crinkled slightly as if she was trying a tad harder, but it was minimal. “She also told me that I had to learn to be strong, and I’ve tried. Trust me. But it can be pretty hard sometimes,” the blonde finally had enough to stretch her lips into an upward curl as she exhaled. “Everyone has days when you’re just like ‘fuck it’, and that’s really me everyday, but it doesn't mean you can’t ever be happy. I’ll protect you. I need to make it up to you anyway,” Courtney chuckled. “Not from the usual, like bullies, or teasing, but I can protect you from shit thoughts. Because it happens a lot for me too. A fuck of a lot. But that’s okay. You need it sometimes but, is it a lot better to tackle it with a friend? Fuck yes.”“Thanks Danny,” she nudged him and sniffed. But she kept her thankful smile, and Danny gave a sigh of relief for it. “You wanna go before your parents start searching for you? Or do you wanna stay here to make me look straight. I don’t mind either way,” he shrugged. “I’ll slip home early in the morning,” she gestured. Uncoiling the blanket around her, she threw it over his mattress. She slipped her legs underneath the sheets and patted the vacant spot next to her. Danny smiled and tucked himself into a comfortable position. He realised how familiar she always seemed. The way her hair seemed to flow down; it was like she was still 6, and she was her typical childish self. She always seemed to have the same, animated expressions, and she always managed to look absolutely stunning while doing it. He definitely had a soft spot for her, like a sister. Maybe it was because every moment he spends with her, he still sees the little girl who would stand up for him no matter what, and hold him when he couldn't stand. She was always a lot stronger than he was. “So…” Courtney giggled. Danny closed his eyes and rested his head against the pillow. “What?” he smiled at her sudden amusement.“Since you’re gay and all…” she began. “...are you into Roy?”Danny scoffed. Courtney cackled into the blanket. “What’s with people asking me that lately?” he groaned as Courtney knocked him on the shoulder. “So…?” she poked his rib and he squirmed in return. “Are you?”“Let’s just get to sleep,” he brought the blanket to his face, rubbing the soft fabric across his heated skin. He was tired. Really fucking tired. “I’ll take that as a yes.”
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
“Thanks for coming with me Danny,” It was odd for the younger boy. He hadn’t hung out as a group of five with the older boys after school yet. Even if he was to, with one of them, he figured that it would be Jason. Being the first one he met and the closest, he was the obvious choice. Maybe followed by Max after the study sessions and homework tips he provided for him. Then maybe Kurtis, for his money. Matt was definitely his last choice. Maybe it was because he was quick to disregard him as Jason’s boyfriend and nothing more. And also a smoker. A heavy smoker. And a weed addict. A really “dedicated” weed addict. But here he was, at the mall, Matt by his side. Alone. Just the two of them. Without Kurtis. Without Max. And for some weird fucking reason, without Jason.“No worries,” Danny smiled back, looking up at the football player. He had his usual lazy smile by his lips. His hands were tucked into his jean pockets and his back was hunched slightly. He definitely fitted into the stoner stereotype. “Sorry for dragging you out on a Saturday afternoon to the mall,” he glanced back at him and stretched out his grin. “I bet you have assignments to finish off.”“Eh, not really,” he shrugged. “Max’s helped me out a lot in the past few weeks. Like a lot. He ran through like three assignments with me.”“That’s so Max,” he let out an airy chuckle. “He did that for me too. No. He does that for me now,” he snickered. “One time, he got mad at me for barely doing our group task in English. Rightfully so, since I did run out of the room crying and then I got distracted after that.”“Why’s that?” Danny felt a verge of an intriguing laugh tickle by his throat.“It was like back in 5th grade. The teacher said that I barely do anything in classes and that I should step up my game. Especially since I was working with Max. I swear we had a weird staring contest after that,” he gestured nonchalantly. “And then what happened?” Danny widened his smile.“I said “do I have something on my face?”--being the dumbest little shit that I am,” Danny bursted out into laughter. Bringing his hand up to his lips, he tried to contain his fit. Matt looked down at him, snorting. “And she sort of screamed at me. So I couldn’t really help but to leave,” he shrugged. “Max was really nice about it though. He came rushing out to help me. And then proceeded to hate me for doing nothing a week later.”“Max’s a really great guy, huh?” Danny nodded to himself. “Yeah, definitely. Never gives himself enough credit though,” his beam dimmed. “He’s a little low when it comes to confidence. Complete opposite of Kurtis, if you ask me,” he snorted. “I’ve known him for a long time now, and he always seems to treat himself badly.”“N-Nothing to do with being…” he cleared his throat. “You know.”“Gay?” he piped out the word much clearer than Danny could have. Matt shrugged. “Who knows? He’s way too smart for me to understand,” he pursed his lips. “I just wish that he would loosen up a bit sometimes, you know? Live in the moment. Take in everything that's around you, because it isn’t going to be like that forever. I mean, look at him. He’s always doing work. Constantly. If not, he’s at band, like he is right now. Playing the clarinet or something.”“I-I’m pretty sure it’s the oboe,” Danny added in. “Eh, whatever. Something to do with blowing,” they giggled in unison, both dismissing their much-too-childish humour. “Oh there it is!”The older brunette shuffled over to one of the stores by their right. He excitedly hopped towards it, his smile widening. It was flashy. To say the least. Danny couldn’t tear his eyes off of the brightly coloured shop. It had flashing lights by the top, beaming the words “Cinderella’s closet”. Racks and racks of dresses hung by the front of the store, each dazzlingly colourful. Frills, gemstones and laces were strapped along the skirts. It was if they were teasing Danny’s eyes with their glow. They looked alluring and certainly beautiful.“Who’s it for?” Danny asked, his eyes still glued onto the gorgeous garments. “Jason,” he answered, a tint of amusement in his voice. Danny raised an eyebrow. “Or more specifically, Violet.”“W-What?” Danny was quite taken back. Shocked, really. He couldn’t make out any more words, even though he had questions stacking up within his mind. “He likes to dress up as a woman sometimes,” he shrugged. “And I’m not planning to stop him.”“Why?” Danny accidentally snapped, catching Matt a little off guard. The older boy raised both eyebrows at his sudden jolt of shock, but he was calm enough to brush it off. “Because it makes him happy. I’m pretty sure he’s not trans. I don’t care if he was to be,” he grinned, his fingers tracing around the blue, shimmering fabric at the end of the rack. “I like Jason. A lot. And I just want him to be happy, you know? Especially with himself.”Danny let the words sink in for a moment. Matt wasn’t the smartest (academically at least) but the words seemed to linger a little longer in his mind. He wanted to disregard it as his tone of voice; the way it was said so smoothly and softly. But he couldn’t really deny that his words made so much sense. It was so sincere. So thoughtful. Really loving. Enough for Danny to forget about all the religion. Just for a moment.“Which one do you like Danny?” Matt began to scroll through the rack. Danny smiled and took his side. “All of them,” he confessed. Matt laughed.“Stereotypical gay,” he joked, nudging him. “Only have a few bucks in my pocket though,” he exhaled. “My dad’s cut off my allowance.”“Why?” Danny pulled out a lacy skirt and inspected it. “Caught me spending it on weed,” he rolled his eyes. “Didn’t care too much. Just thought it was a waste of money,” he let out a groan as he sprayed his palms over his face. Danny looked over to him with concern, tempted to place a hand onto his shoulder, but he halted when Matt forced out a husky chuckle and sniffed. It much more forced than before. Nowhere as bright as it was before.“It’s stupid, really. I can break the law. I can smoke all I want. And he won’t care. At all. But if I was to ever tell him that I was gay, he will probably throw me out,” he exhaled painfully. “On the street, if he could. Probably after punching me shitless.”“Oh shit,” Danny cursed, completely appalled. When Jason told him that Matt was a perfect puzzle piece for their republican family, he believed him. There was no doubt that he was. You could easily tell from just looking at them. But he didn’t know that it was this serious. It was this extreme. He hears horror stories about religious households throwing out their own kids and damning them, but he never thought that one, potential victim, would be in front of him. “So it’s probably a lot easier to keep everything in a little bubble,” he pulled out a tight, leather dress. It was a glistening, jet black. It looked smooth and clear, like it would stick to the skin perfectly. It would reach around the upper-mid thigh for “Violet”. The younger boy felt awe wash over him as he ran his hand over the end of the skirt. “And you’re apart of it now,” he nudged, chuckling. “So what do you think? I think it’s a pretty cute fabric.”“Looks kinky,” he cackled, Matt snorting. “It’s perfect then,” he snaked past the younger boy and strolled over to the cash register. Danny blinked at the football player as he slammed an $100 dollar bill onto the counter. He was pretty sure that it only costed no less than $30 dollars, and he was pretty sure from the way the cashier scavenged through the cash register to look for notes. After the transaction, Matt enthused over ice cream and practically dragged the younger boy to a stand. He chuckled at his childish nature, which seemed to never come out whenever they were in a group. It seemed to be overshadowed by his slow, monotone, stoner self, which Danny didn’t mind. It was just different, that’s all. He liked Matt either way.“Kurtis actually showed me this place,” he said, his eyes crinkling shut as he took in a mouthful of his dessert. “It was like 3 years ago. After I came out to him.”“So how long have you been a group?” Danny took a spoonful of his own cup. “Around 2 years as a four. Max and I’ve been friends for a while. Same as Kurtis and Jason, but we never drawn to each other until we felt safer,” he shrugged. Danny raised an eyebrow. “What do you mean?” he peered up at him with intriguity.“There were boys worse than…” he rolled his eyes. “You know,” Danny exhaled in acknowledgement. “If he ever saw the four of us, we wouldn’t see the end of the word “fag”. The group together...we’re like walking punching bags. Except covered in glitter and fluro coloured with a sign saying “I’m a bottom”,” Danny snickered. “The inner gay seems to peek out when we’re a group.”“Maybe it’s because you’re all really close, so you feel really comfortable,” Danny suggested. Matt cocked a shoulder.“Probably. They’re a lot cooler than any of those football dicks,” he raised his nose and sneered. “First of all, you’re a football player. Second of all, you like dicks,” he chuckled. Matt smiled.“Only Jason’s,” he winked, Danny scoffing. Clearing his throat, he choked out a laugh to try and match the older brunette’s. “Fun fact, that’s his favourite flavour.”He pointed over to Danny’s cup and widened his grin. “Rocky road?” Danny questioned. Matt nodded. “Yep. Got it for him, nearly, a year ago. The first day we started going out,” he gazed away, like he was reminiscing the familiar nostalgia. “A year in a week’s time.”“Cute,” Danny could feel his tongue tingle at the slight lie. He liked Jason. He liked Matt. And he certainly wanted to support them wholeheartedly. They deserved happiness, and he knew that. But he could also feel sin sinking their teeth into his neck, and he couldn’t help but to flinch. After all these years, he still couldn’t help but to feel guilty. Even if it’s not him. They’re his friends. Best friends, maybe. In a near future, more like. Just the fact that it was right in front of him. Taunting sins at him. Made him admittedly uncomfortable, but also borderline admirable. Queer emotions churned within his stomach as he swallowed a thick, gulp of the cold dessert.“Where is he today?” he decided to steer away the conversation in a less romantic, more platonic direction. “Out with family. They like to have a lot of family time,” he grinned. “They’re really cool when it comes to his sexuality too. Super family oriented.”“That’s great,” he felt his cheeks ache a tad from his stretching smile. “And Kurtis?”“Working at some cafe down the block,” he answered. “I’m pretty sure that he needs to pay off a debt from his parents.”“Ha, what happened?”“Crashed the car,” he rolled his eyes. “Deserves it for speeding so much.”“Did he crash into a tree or something?” when Matt nodded reluctantly, borderline sarcastically, he couldn’t help but to roar out a laughter. “Actually?!”“Yeah…” he ran his palm over his forehead. “After some party last year. Max practically screamed when it happened.”“Was it scary?” “A little. Jason’s reaction was hilarious though,” he laughed. “Plus, I’m pretty sure that we were all too fucking drunk to realise what was going on,” Danny cracked a small smile at Matt’s gestures. “It sucks that Max can't drive.”Danny felt his heart sag a little. Matt’s voice had so much enthusiasm and nostalgia. He felt out of place. Not only were they a year older, but they'd also been friends for a lot longer than. Well. His existence been known to the members of the group. He was of course glad that they seemed to love having him around. To an extent. They didn't seem to complain, and their smiles didn't look too fake. But the four were different. They went through alot together. At least enough to create a high school movie out of it. Danny...just didn't seem to fit. He wasn’t apart of the typical, rebellious high school movie that seemed to be filmed around their lives. He could see it. Four boys that come together. Sinning as a group. Fighting against society. In a way it was like him. Except he didn’t have the strength to fight back. Or speak up. Or retaliate when he felt aching pounds by his back, no matter how much it burnt like acid. He was a tad jealous of it, too. That they had each other. That they could fall back on each other for support. But it was admirable in a way. That Danny was slowly easing himself into such a loveable group. It brought a smile to his face as he watched up at the rambling Matt. Maybe he was a lot more than just Jason's boyfriend.
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
Danny could remember it. Really well. The way the brush tickled the apples of his cheeks. The way the creamy lipstick smeared over his full, plump lips. The way his eyelashes batted over the tops of his eyelids as he blinked. There was a thick fragrance of sweetness; like a mixture of candy and perfume. It coated Danny with a sense of nostalgia.He could practically see an 8 year old Courtney kneeling before him, wiping away a beating sweat. She let out a long exhale to calm her tense state. It had been maybe over an hour since she enthused to give him a makeover. 7 year old Danny was much braver. He was happy to go along with her little dress-up routine. She sat on her knees and placed the cosmetics by her side. “Done,” he recalled her voice being much higher back then. She placed a long, curly red wig on top of his head and circled the locks around his face. She had probably kept it from their school play that they performed that year, “the Little Mermaid”. He remembers Courtney on top of that school stage, looking as charming as she always did, alongside Roy, who played Eric that year. He remembers Danny feeling a tad jealous too, a sour taste lingering on his tongue, especially when they hugged at the end (which thankfully replaced a kiss). But then again, he was pretty happy to see them up there. Probably the best junior, grade school performance that had been ever performed. He couldn't even top that with his own performance as Peter Pan in the year after.He remembers that the red wig never stood out to him when Courtney wore it. She didn't look horrible, she never really did, but she suited the blonde locks much better. But on him. Well. That was another story. He loved the way it tumbled into his vision and twirled in front of him like dangling fairy lights. When he peered up at Courtney with the biggest smile, he saw something else. Someone, actually. Between them was a large mirror, and what he saw on the other side, made him feel...different. In a way he had never felt before. He had the largest eyes, with the longest eyelashes flattering up and down like wings. He had sharp, dark eyebrows, which were so bold and strong, fuelling him with confidence, yet rich and milky, calming him in an almost dream-like state. He used to hate the way his lips would pout, cursing himself for his feminine looks, but with the makeup, he seemed to love it. A lot. The way the red shined and glistened in the light; he couldn’t get enough of it.“Do you like it?” Courtney poked her head to the side of the handheld mirror. Young Danny was in awe, and could only give a small nod. It felt so...perfect. Courtney clapped and squealed. “I’m so glad! Rate it out of 10!”“15,” he mumbled, shaking his head. “I love it! So much! I-I--” he tried to muster up the courage which pumped within his chest. “I adore it!”He remembered the word tingling by his lips. It was an odd sensation. Like it was destiny, even though he didn't believe in most bullshit like that. Looking back, maybe it was his younger self so intrigued, so in love, with the person in front of him, that he was in a daze. Either way, it seemed to catch Courtney's attention too.“Adore…” the Australian tapped her finger by the curve of her lips. “I like that. That’s your name!” She threw her arms over his shoulders and pulled him in close to her chest. She jumped up and down excitedly, Danny laughing within her grasp as he joined in. He squeezed her tightly by the waist and he felt the urge to sing the name “Adore” along with her.Kids. They were just kids. Kids who were still so juvenile. So pure. Unharmed. The way he wanted to stay. The world he wanted to live in. It was a fantasy, really. No real life shit getting in the way. No reality fogging up the beautiful scenery. Just happiness. At that point in time. The moment they had their arms around each other, jumping and giggling happily. It felt like the earth was still. Like "Adore" had brought him into an underwater world, where it was just him, Courtney and Roy. And they could be together as a 3 forever. Courtney suddenly gasped and threw herself off. “We need to go to the family dinner!” Danny wished that his younger self would be kept there, at Courtney's room, forever. Because little did the 7 year old know that his life, his childish illusion, would melt away that night.Courtney’s Christmas sweater was etched into his mind after all these years. It was lined with stripes of red and green. It was a little overgrown, enough to reach down to her thighs. A little scarlet skirt swayed by her knees as she twirled. She had the sparkliest red shoes on that night, something that Danny was envious of. A Christmas tree with twinkling lights was printed on the front. It probably looked ugly on everyone but her. Like always.His was, instead, really itchy. It was given to him by his mom, who probably got it from a family friend. He didn’t like it too much. The olive green looked more like puke and the badly sewed on reindeer at the front didn’t really help with the overall “look”. If he could even call it that. It was also complimented by his stained jeans. His mom urged him to wear his best trousers, but really, he didn’t have anything better. He was messy kid. So in a way, he wasn't lying to his mom by wearing these.“But this isn’t good for Adore,” Courtney eyed his look up and down and shook her head dramatically. “Nu-uh. I don’t like it,” she strutted over to her closet and threw open the doors. “What about this?”She pulled out a shiny, red dress with silk-like fabric. It had thick straps, lined down to the waist. It was somewhat loosely fitted at the top, with the skirt swooping out in a gentle flow, almost like the ocean. Danny basically lunged towards it. It felt so pearly on his palms. “I love it!” he beamed. “Or more like, adore it,” they both bursted out into laughter. “It sucks that we don’t have shoes for you,” Courtney pouted. “But this would fit at least.”It was a little shorter than how Courtney would wear it, seeping just past the knees instead of the ground. It made him look a little more petite and young. Maybe a little cute, if he was honest. “I’ll just go barefoot,” he shrugged, running his hands over the smooth skirt. It was cool against his heated hands. He remembers Courtney's room been so warm and cozy, unlike the outside, wintery world. “But first,” Courtney reached over to a wooly jumper. “You need this. So you don’t get cold.”
Adore.
She was right in front of him. Standing beautifully. Her smile full. Her eyes twinkling. Her stance gorgeous. Courtney took her by the hand and guided her outside. Danny could still feel the dress flowing behind his younger self. It wavered mystically, and ever so airily. Adore’s body was washed over with a sense of joy. Complete joy. As she ran down the street, hand in hand with Courtney. Looking back, Danny would still dub that moment as one of the happiest moments of his life. The way chuckles drummed along his throat lightly. The way the world seemed to light up, even though the sun was setting behind them. Maybe that was what childish wonder was like. Seeing the world in a beautiful sepia. On their way, they had run into Roy. He used to run late all the time back then, unlike his present day self. He was probably preoccupied by his new video game, or playing around with his pet dog. Either way, Adore was pretty glad that she wasn't entering alone. The 8 year old Roy was very petite back then, around the same size as Danny. He had his dark hair gelled back dashingly, to reveal his bright smile, accompanied by his loveable dimples. He had a new looking, shiny tux, which made Adore’s heart skip a beat. A blush was underneath all the coated on foundation.“Oh hey Courtney,” he smiled, his eyes going over to Adore. There was a pause. She couldn’t decipher whether he hated it, and was about to laugh at her, or loved it, somewhat. “And…?” he raised an eyebrow. “Danny?”“U-Umm…” she coughed. Roy smiled. “You look great!” he enthused, catching her completely off guard. She swore that her body froze for a moment from shock. “The makeup’s really good. I nearly couldn’t recognise you.”“That was me,” Courtney added, cocking a shoulder. “We decided to call her Adore.”“Adore…” Danny, to this day, loved the way he slurred her name. He sounded a little intrigued and a tad excited. “I love it! She looks beautiful!” Adore’s smile grew wider. Roy gave a quick glance to his watch and gasped. “Oh no, we’re running late!” he clasped his hand together with Adore’s. “Brad’s family is waiting for us!”Danny could remember how soft his hands were. They were so much bigger than his. It felt like it was cradling Adore’s lovingly, making her feel safe. Another one of his happiest moments. Adore ran her thumb over the back of his hand and tried to cherish every second. Danny pondered as to if his hand was still delicate like that. Probably not. From handling all those stage props and writing endlessly. Maybe Adore should have cherished those touches a little bit more. The serene and loving feeling of nostalgia washed away, however. He still managed to recall the moments. Probably more vividly than the actual happy ones. The dense silence. The clinking of the utensils been lowered onto the table. The appalled faces. The gasps. The widened eyes. The dropped jaws.Adore’s world dulled to muted rust. “Hi!” Courtney, at the time, seemed completely unaware of everyone’s reactions. She perked up like her usual self and skipped over to the vacant chair between her parents. “Sorry for being late,” Roy had picked up on the eery atmosphere too. Clearing his throat, he straightened his back and proceeded off to his parents, who glared over at him suspiciously. Adore was abandoned at the entrance. Alone. There was a lump by her throat. Sweat escaped the pores and cracks of her foundation. She could feel the dress plastering onto her skin.It was like the world was spinning around her, closing in on her. She couldn't breathe. She couldn’t speak. She could barely stand up right. She blinked and all she could see was the priest, his shadow casting over her body. She was kneeled to the ground, her hands clasped over her lap and her gaze up at his crinkled face. His brows were knitted together, with the most furious look she had ever seen. His lips were curled down harshly. His eyes looked dark, sharp, and cut-throat. He was screaming down at her, making her feel like nothing. It pounded within her ears achingly, but what felt worse was her chest. She felt like she was getting stabbed. Over and over and over. Like nothing she did could be worse. Like she made the worst decision. She was trash. Scum. A useless time for God. Adore trembled. It was like blackness was closing in on her, giving her no space to breathe. She felt like she was drowning. Or like she was inclosed in a tight, tight box. Or gasping onto her final gulps of air. By the corner of her eye she could see her mom, her face in her palms. She was sobbing, ever so quietly. She couldn’t tell whether she was upset at Adore, or at Danny for doing such a stupid thing. Part of them wished that she was crying because the priest was so harsh. Or maybe at least because she regretted coming to this Christmas dinner. But they never talked about it again. Ever. It was like they swept it under the rug after all these years. Like it was rotting away in some closet somewhere. Never to be spoken about again. And he was somewhat glad. He tried to erase the existence of Adore all together after that. He tried to forget about that feeling, that amazing feeling, he had when Courtney held up that mirror. Danny still dwelled on the aftermath. Courtney caressed his hand ever so delicately as she wiped away Adore’s tears with her other. Roy took his other side, his arm over his body, gentle strokes running up and down his sides to try and soothe his cries.
Even the rich makeup stained.
He felt thick, clumpy tears run down his cheeks, melting away all the layers of makeup. One by one, droplets stroked at Adore, revealing a much more soft, fragile surface. Danny. He was coming back up to the surface.
They can only see what’s on my face
He was sobbing. Crying. Practically screaming. But it was nothing like what she felt on the inside. Danny was broken. Completely. Shattered into a million pieces. Leaving behind just dust. Danny couldn’t, to this day, decipher what broke him the most. The fact that the priest, the most respected person in the whole neighbourhood, hated him? Or was it his mom crying in the corner? But then again, this stemmed Brad’s “joking” further. It went from nudges to shoves to punches. From glances to glares to curses. From words to teases to verbal abuse. It made his life a living nightmare. Or maybe it was all three things merged together with a pinch of himself. He was dumb enough to think that this was okay. He was stupid enough to come to a Christmas party as a girl. He was ignorant enough to think that this was okay. That his happiness mattered to other people. It didn’t. And he had to accept that. Or maybe it was something completely different. Maybe he was torn between his peers and him. Adore made him feel...different. In the best way possible. It wasn't like anything he had ever felt before. But they shredded it to pieces, right in front of him. In front of everyone. Danny felt his body tense. He gave three deep breaths and wriggled between the light duvet and soft mattress. His thoughts were running again, running away with his sense of consciousness. It sealed the thoughts with a lock and threw away the key. Far, far away. So the tears bubbling by his throat would settle. He couldn’t stop thinking of Adore, and the way it felt to be her. The way his lips tingled at just the name. The way the world seemed to light up around him, no matter how dark it was. Maybe that's why he was envious of Violet. She had a supporter, Matt. She had the confidence to do it, too. Again and again. Adore emerged once, and never again. The spark was put out so quickly, and he missed it. He really did.
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
Danny didn’t hate the rain. It was more like the opposite. He loved the sound of pitter patters outside his room and the greying clouds casting over him. He would love to capture it with words. Ｍaybe alongside a little tune. If only he could muster up the effort to think. But today was different. He cursed to himself when it began to pour outside. It wouldn’t have bothered him that much if he was still with Gia and Jay, since they sat by the cafeteria. But he was finally getting used to sitting outside with the other four, with the most beautiful grass field by his feet. He loved it. And seeing it drowning in rain made him a little upset.And rain also meant that everyone had to sit inside. Everyone. It was pretty crowded in the cafeteria. Enough to make Danny feel like he was suffocating in a way. The five decided to take a spot in the corner of the room. There was a small circular table which was a tad further away from everyone else. But it seemed pretty raggedy and old. Probably why it was placed so faraway. Danny always hated the school’s limited budget, but it’s actual worth hit him in the head with realisation at lunch. It could barely fit everyone inside, which is saying something. They weren’t that big of a school.“I swear to god, I fucking hate this school,” Jason rolled his eyes, his elbow resting on the table. It squeaked beneath him slightly, making Jason groan somewhat angrily. “And it’s really loud in here,” Matt grumbled, a little louder so the other members could hear. He placed a hand to his side, lightly pushing down to feel the seat rock. Yep. This school was definitely poor.“This is why we sit outside,” Kurtis blew aside his bangs, which swooped down to his gaze. Kicking his feet underneath the table, they swore that it slightly unscrewed loose into their laps. Enough for Jason to gasp and snicker softly.“Can’t help the weather though, can we?” Max chuckled, his gaze down at his phone. “Yeah, but I’m still gonna complain about it,” Kurtis pouted childishly, making Max laugh. “Danny?” the younger boy had his eyes elsewhere, like always. Maybe he was a little more preoccupied than usual after the other night. “Are you alright?”He leaned over to his side and gazed at the same scenery. A table by the middle of the cafeteria was filled with, probably, the most infamous students within school. Football players, athletes, cheerleaders, those obnoxious kids at the back of the classroom that can't stop screaming bullshit. Stereotypes exist for a reason, and they definitely slotted themselves into the social hierarchy; at the top, of course. And they also had to be the loudest group within the room; cackling, shouting and screaming across to the other side. But in the bunch was also Courtney. There was no doubt that the label of “head cheerleader” suited her, more than anyone else could ever pull off, but Danny thought that there was more to her. Maybe he was a little biased, but he wished that people would treat her like she was more. She was more than just a pretty face, and it was a shame that she was involved in a pretty bad group. It looked like she wasn't going to leave to either, which makes it that much worse. Especially after her… “confession”, he knew that she needed support. Actual support. And actual friends; not people who stand around and look socially acceptable. “Courtney? What about her?” Danny glanced up at him and shook his head.“I-it’s nothing. Sorry,” he stretched out a smile, which made the other boy a tad sceptical. “Is something up?” Danny admittedly shrugged, but didn’t respond with audible words. Max pursed his lips and squinted slightly, trying to decipher Danny. “Something to do with Courtney, right? Why? Is she bothering you?”“N-No, not at all,” he held both palms up. “She’s great. We’re really good friends actually.”“Then why are you staring at her?” he peered towards her again. Danny swallowed. He felt the bars around Courtney’s secret rust as Max leant over his crossed arms and gazed forward. The younger boy could feel guilt wash over him. He wanted to tell someone. He really did. And Max was probably the most reliable out of anyone. But he just couldn't do it. Not here. Not at this state. “I’m guessing it’s a secret. Since you won’t tell me,” he exhaled into a smile when Danny halted. “That’s okay. Just know that I’m here to listen.”He caressed his shoulder and gave him one last glimpse of a grin, before tearing away from his lingering glance. Danny gulped and drummed his fingers along the end of his sleeve. “Hey Max…” he began, Max looking over at him from the corner of his eye. “Yeah?” Danny gave him a look of uncomfort, with his brows crinkled and full lips parted. A bitter aftertaste of Courtney filled his mind. His mind darted over to her look that day. The way she frowned. The way her eyes lost colour. The moment she looked as if she was helpless. Like she was begging for help. Danny shook his head. He couldn't say it right now. Not right now. Not with everyone else around. He wasn't even ready to spill it. He just had to swallow it down.“...have you come out to your parents?” he blurted out, both from curiosity and the urge to steer away from his thoughts. Max pursed his lips. “...no,” he cleared his throat. “Jason’s the only one who’s out.”“Technically closeted to the school too,” Kurtis adds, inserting himself into the conversation. “...well we try.”“But your hair gives it away,” Matt joked, Kurtis replying with the middle finger. “‘Ts true. I’m a pretty successful closeted if you ask me.”“Except you look at Jason with sex eyes,” Kurtis smirked. Jason scoffed. Max eyed Danny and shook his head, which the younger boy interpreted as a “I’m sorry about these idiots”.“Whatever Kurt. I’m gonna head over to my locker. Forgot to get my books for next period,” his eyes quickly scanned over the room before he gave a light peck to Jason’s cheek. He shot Kurtis a look of annoyance mixed with playful mischief and Max a warm smile. Danny grinned at his geeky-looking salute before he swept himself into the hallway and closed the door behind him. The young boy exhaled. Matt’s slicked back hair. His baggy jeans. His fucking leather jacket (which he was secretly jealous over). He looked like a popular, acted like a popular, and somehow Danny was in this little “bubble”, as he calls it, with him. He couldn't really figure out how he managed to get himself into this, or how he was still in this group with him, but he stopped caring after their day out. Maybe he was slightly sick of all the bullshit stereotypes that stabbed his back every single day. Maybe now, he actually wanted to see the obviously gay cheerleader date the good looking jock. Just to get back at all those times shit movies played the “girl-next-door” and the “good-looking-jock” stereotype. Maybe not see them kiss though. He mentally cursed himself for being so homophobic. So anti...him? I guess. He just casted the phrase “baby steps” across himself and tried to brush it aside. “He's probably just going to get some grass off Jerrick,” Kurtis rolled his eyes, taking an imaginary cigarette in his fingers and pinching it between his lips. “I'm pretty sure he's laying off it,” Jason gestured his hand over Kurtis’s gaze, making the brunette boy scrunch up his nose in protest. “He doesn't even do it that much.”“Bullshit,” he rolled his eyes, eyeing Max for his approval. “Sorry Jason, I’m on Kurtis’s side for this one,” he shrugged. Kurtis cheered and shoved Jason lightly, confidently arching his chest like he was taking his dominance. “Told ya so,” he poked out his tongue. Jason snorted and shoved him back. “What about you Danny?” he peered over and blinked his eyes, the view looking a little glassy as he pouted. The younger boy drew out a guilty expression. “Well…” he looked up at Max. “...I'm on their side…”“Ha! In your face Jason. Majority rules,” he announced, crossing his arms over his chest and raising his chin. “Oh shut the fuck up,” he furrowed his brows. “He's my boyfriend, you know? I know him the most.”“Yeah, but Max is a genius,” the rest of the group looked towards the amused boy. “And they've been friends for like a century. He knows more.”“Oh whatever Kurt. Maybe if it was such a big deal, you wouldn’t invite yourself over to my house and smoke pot,” he rolled his eyes, making Kurtis sneer. Max choked out a laugh and glanced away, trying to cover his embarrassing giggles. Or maybe he was hiding away from Jason’s death glares. Kurtis parted his lips to speak, probably to say some smartass comment about Matt or jab at their gayness, but the shrieking school bell cut him off. Danny dubbed this as a “saved by the bell” moment and chuckled to himself. Kicking his legs over the seat, he took Max’s side as they joined the tail of the dwindling crowd. Jason was quick to come over, as if he was dismissing the brunette boy all together. Which Kurtis didn’t take all too well. He nudged past him and replied with furrowed brows. But Jason seemed all too deep in his pissed-off-state to care.With his nose pinched high into the air and his lips thinned out, he strutted past him carelessly and brushed his presence off. Max and Danny shared a snicker.“They can both be so childish,” he laughed. Danny glanced up and him and chimed in with a chuckle. He couldn’t really figure out if it was his height tricking him, or if he was just that much more mature than the rest of the group. Maybe both. He seemed to always detach himself from whatever petty fight they were having that day and rise above it. Then he would usually look down at them and laugh. Maturely and calmly. And fuck, it made Danny appreciate him that much more. In a way, he was slightly jealous. And that was coming from an angsty teen that cares more about punk music than school work. AKA, something that Max is not.There was something about his calm and collected tone that always got Danny hooked. Not in a way that Roy does, but in a more…mentor like manner…? It confused him. If you were to tell Danny three months ago that he would look up to a band nerd who was also gay, he would probably burst out into laughter. Now, it seemed like no one else would better fit the part. Nowadays, he's wondering why the fuck anyone wants to be popular. Having friends that were decent people seemed a fuck of a lot better.
“Fag,”
Danny shook his head and slowly merged his conscience into reality. Max had stopped in his tracks, his shoulder cornering into Danny’s lane, enough for him to lightly bump into him. He first glanced up at him; at his quivering bottom lip and dilated pupils. This wasn’t good. He then glanced towards the view in front. This definitely wasn’t good. “Walking in some sort of gay cult isn’t a good way to keep yourself in the closet you know,” Brad had stepped aggressively in front of them, the thump making Max wheeze backwards. With his arms crossed over his chest, his teammates crowded around him like some sort of wall. In a way, it made Danny feel claustrophobic. “Oh just fuck off,” Jason made his way to the front, lightly nudging the frozen Max back to shield him. “Seriously, we’ve done nothing wrong.”“Everyone knows that you’re a fucking freak,” he spat, his gaze shifting towards the others. “All of you are.”“Oh is that what your daddy tells you?” he cocked a shoulder and snorted. Kurtis snickered into his sleeve and curved around the two younger boys, who seemed to be in some sort of paralysed state. Danny could basically feel Max stiffen like cement in front of him.“I wonder who has daddy issues?” Kurtis jabbed his finger into his chest and the widest, most arrogant grin spread across his lips. Danny gulped.“I mean that’s what you expect when your daddy rapes little boys,” Jason’s tone was lined with the most revolting venom that he could muster up. And that was a hell of a lot. Enough for Danny to feel repulsed. Even he knew that it was too far. Brad was like a ticking time bomb. Everyone knew that. It seemed like Jason knew, but didn’t care. Especially from the way he still arched his back and dragged out a smirk. And who knows? Maybe he would regret it all after. After he went through the shit storm that was gathering above him, that everyone could see from miles away, but he chose to brush off. Danny shut his eyes. He couldn’t take it.
Bang. Bang. Bang.
And it was like lightning struck.
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
Danny felt his body freeze. Completely. Like something travelled through his limbs and froze him from the inside out. It felt like dried cement. It was like stone was carved through his veins, sculpting his legs slanted and his hands fanned by his lips. Each pound echoed throughout the hallway. It somehow pierced through all the chatter, screams and gasps. He could feel his ears muffle and clog at each hit. One. By one. By one. He went numb. Cold. Empty.Jason gave a single glance up at him. His dark eyes had lost colour. Danny was hit with a sudden gush of guilt, riling up his throat like a technicolour yawn. The aftertaste was disgusting. Strait up vile. Jason was practically begging for help. He didn’t need words to know that. But he couldn’t do anything. He wouldn’t do anything. If he wanted to stay safe anyway.Red oozed down his curled down lip, staining a trail with brewed together tears. His pale face was painted with marks of red. A harsh crimson red. Looked as if he was being stained with the dirtiest venom. He drew out a harsh cry; an echoing wail, more like. But it wasn’t really a beg for mercy. It was more of a beg for help. To him. It tugged by Danny’s chest, but he still stood there. Stunned. Unmoving. Like some sort of coward. Well, he was a coward. An idiot. A person that does absolutely nothing, even though ultimately he thinks that he’s lesser than everyone else at the end of the day. Kurtis was screaming. His hands were swooping and grasping through the wall of classmates who cheered. They practically elbowed him, kicked him, restricted him, until the brunette hurled over and began to cough. His eyes never tore away from Jason, even when cradling his own stomach and watching his own world haze into a blur. Max had been thrown over to the locker, a forearm imprisoning him by his neck. Some other classmate had clutched his collar, borderline suffocating him in his tight, tight grasp. His breath was getting shallower; too shallow for Danny to cope. He watched him squirm and kick against the metal doors. Crinkling his eyes shut, he let out a small sob and resisted desperately, but ultimately, weakly. Danny was useless. Completely useless.
“Okay, back off,”
The hallway went silent. Matt had his palm pressed into Brad’s chest. Tossing him away swiftly, he turned himself around to Jason and cupped his cheek. He gently stroked his bleeding rivulet, before jolting up towards his fellow team member. “Let’s not do this now,” he snapped. Brad’s attention snaked past the player and towards Jason, who had his hand covering his purple-blue blemish. He breathed out a scent of utter shock . “I-It’s class anyway.”“Fag,” the older teen spat, shoving his hands into his pockets. He eyed the rest of his group, who slowly formed a bunch behind him.
“Trust you to be just like them,”
Brad gave a single glance over to Danny, a cold line escaping his lips as he passed. The younger boy gulped, feeling a sharp pain travell through his body. Like a dagger of the past jabbed through his chest. The other students parted, or more like, hurried away from him in fear. A few of them began to proceed off to class, with the full crowd eventually dissolving away. Lingering behind was the usual group.Danny’s eyes wandered over to the other students. They had their feet dragged behind them. Max was pushed free, and the tall boy took a quick inhale before rushing over to Jason. He was still collapsed onto the ground, his expression blank and borderline broken. Matt watched the last few students close the door behind them before lunging over to Jason and cradling him. “I-I didn’t know that this would happen,” his voice trembled, tears cracking his words. “I-I’m so sorry for ever letting this happen to you. Especially here. In front of everyone and…”He was cut off by himself, as cries overcame his senses. He hunched over him, bawling over his limp partner. Max caressed his back and sniffed. “I-It’s okay Matt,” he ran his fingers through his gelled back, grey locks. Matt peered up and shook his head.“Of course it’s not! For fuck’s sake Max, I’m not going to stand around and watch something like this happen,” his eyes roam over to Danny. Either intentionally or unintentionally. It didn’t matter though. The younger boy could feel the stare dig into his chest.He was wrong. He should’ve done something. But he didn’t. Because he’s a fucking coward. He’s useless. Motherfucking useless.“We’re not going to let you babysit us,” Kurtis chuckled, the laugh painfully raspy. Slumping a hand onto his shoulder, he shuffled himself into an upright position. “We’re seniors. I’m pretty sure we’ve gone through hell and back already,” Matt tried to snicker. Key word being tried. “Multiple times.”“Let me care about you for once Kurtis,” he watched the brunette struggle up. Slamming his hand against the locker, his legs trembled underneath him as he steadied himself into a standing position. Well. Barely. “Rather not,” he joked, choking out a stiff laugh. “So are we gonna ditch or what?” he brushed his hands over his jeans. “I’m sort of over school right now.”Matt’s eyes gazed over to Jason, who cupped his quivering hand over his cheek. Smiling, he gave a light nod and pressed his lips together. “Mhm…” the younger brunette hummed and placed his hands by his side. Slowly sitting up, Matt quickly rushed to support his back and neck. “D-Don’t hurt yourself. You can take your time,” he slightly panicked. Jason just shook his head. “I’m fine Matt,” he ran his index finger over the back of his hand, lining down to his digits. Jason peered up at him and smiled. Matt tried to reciprocate it, but it tugged painfully by his cheeks. He looked like he was fighting against his resculpting muscles. Danny bit down on his bottom lip. His legs were still nailed to the ground rigidly. It was like his body was hammered into the hallway. He couldn’t move. Everything felt too stiff. Too heavy. Too much. “I-I’m not,” Max choked out. The other four boys snapped over to him. “Why not?” Kurtis raised an eyebrow. “Because...I-I’m already late to class and...” he ran his left palm over his upper right arm. “...I don’t really want to get into trouble.”“You’re already in deep shit Max. You know that,” Kurtis took a step towards him, like an invite to comfort, but the taller boy just shook his head. “I’m okay. Really,” he gestured stiffly. “Just a few scratches,” he scattered past him and pulled down his sweater. “I’ll see you guys later.”His voice was small. Really quiet. Borderline whispering, like he was regretting it. “He’s always like this,” Kurtis grumbled under his breath, shoving his hands into his pockets.“I know. But there’s nothing we can do,” Matt had Jason’s arm draped across his shoulders as he helped him up. Holding a hand up to his waist, he reeled in closer to his chest. “That’s the way Max is. You know he has good morals.”“Eh, mostly,” he rolled his eyes. “Would be a lot better if he stopped with the whole “homophobia" thing.”Danny widened his eyes. “Some people deal with it differently, okay?” he strolled past Danny, brushing Jason’s body slightly against his. He wondered if it was a little jab towards the younger boy, but he didn’t care either way. He already hated himself for everything. He didn’t need some sort of reminder. “I just feel like he’s so anti…”
Us. Himself.
"I don't know like..."
Me.
“...us…? I guess,” Kurtis finished his sentence and trailed behind them. Danny cursed under his breath. Quiet enough for no one else to hear. Harsh enough to make himself sigh deeply.“You coming or what?” Kurtis called over to him coldly. Like he was barely bothering. Understandably. "Yeah..."Danny had one job: to keep the friends that accepted him for him. Even though he didn’t accept himself. But he fucked it up. Royally fucked it up. Because he did nothing.
“So typical...so fucking typical…”
He repeated it, over and over, in the car ride to Jason’s house. Even his own homophobic senses weren’t regurgitating out when Jason was cuddled up towards Matt. He honestly just stopped caring. All he wanted to do was punch himself, harder than humanly possible, so he could feel sane. He was done. He was done sitting by the sidelines and watching everything happen in front of him. He was done seeing everything happen instead of being apart of it. He wanted to snatch the script off of the director and step up on stage to be apart of his own life. To perform in the years he’s supposed to never forget. For the right reasons too. He clutched onto his seat belt. It was going to change. He was going to change.
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
A low bass buzzed through the dimly lit room. A single, small lamp with a spawny light bulb hung in the corner, a murky yellow just casting over Danny’s body. Well, up to his thighs anyway. A single beer bottle swung loosely in his left hand which slumped over the side of the couch. His index and middle finger drummed along the neck of the liquor bottle alongside the rhythm of the quietly played song.
“Let's go chasing stars this evening”
He felt the dense, heavy feeling of intoxication weigh down on his forehead. The warmth pressed down against him, like it was casting a hum around his body. He slowly shut his eyes. The world around him felt like it was swirling slowly beneath him.
“Eyes wide shut, in fast cars dreaming”
He could see it. Courtney’s heartbroken face. The way her brows crinkled. The way her rosy pink lips parted into a frown. It looked as if she wanted to say more. But she didn’t. Maybe because it would be too much for her. She already said enough. It wasn’t like Danny wanted to hear it anyway. Whatever she was going to say next would be painful to hear for the both of them. Maybe having the lingering thought of curiosity was better than having to come to his senses and accept...well...whatever the fuck was going on. With her. With him. With everything.
“Oh oh we're tripping at the speed of light”
But then again, curiosity seemed to always get the better of him. It was always so hard for him to swallow down whatever scraps he was given. Well. Especially when people like Max do something so unexpected like that. Danny never knew how to plant both feet back into the ground after being shoved over harshly. When something smashed into his side, leaving him startled and vulnerable as he topples to the ground, he could never really get up with ease. Maybe it was because, in his eyes, everything else had meaning. Everything but him. At first glance, everything seemed so vibrant. So picturesque. Like they were plastic models for a 70s sitcom. Like everyone else around him was a one dimensional stereotype that slotted so perfectly into the picture. With absolutely no overlap or gaps. Well, except him anyway. He always knew that he didn’t fit in. He never did. And he got sick of trying after a while. That’s when all the other puzzle pieces seemed to shift away. Like the part reserved for him was eventually filled up and he was left alone. Wandering aimlessly. It meant that it didn't matter if he bounced back in full force. Because he was useless anyway. Maybe that’s when Roy began to forget about him.
“Who thought this could be paradise.”
But then again, everyone had secrets at the end of the day. Of course everyone wasn’t perfect, no matter how much it seemed sometimes. Danny often forgot that. Probably because he was so far away from the crowd, that everyone else just looked like cardboard cutouts; a painting hung on a wall, instead of the environment around him. That’s probably why Courtney meant so much to him. Because even though she has role in the picturesque world (a very meaningful one too), she never failed to forget about him. Even though he was a murky grey. Even though he didn’t fit in. Even though he was a wanderer.
“I don't need to sleep tonight”
But maybe everyone else thought they were wanderers too. Max probably did. That’s probably why he keeps on wincing away from the rest of the group. But then again, Kurtis did mention something. Something pretty...important. He was homophobic. Something a little off for someone whose friends are all gay. He didn’t exactly know Max too well. He did “I just wanna to feel alive” Danny virtually knew nothing about him. Or at least, he felt like he knew him a lot more than he actually did. He thought Max was a simple guy. Someone who plays the oboe. Aces his classes. Is gay. Danny never really bothered to think of the rest. Maybe because it was a lot easier to think that he was one dimensional. A lot less thoughts involved, I guess. So the chance of Max being homophobic never even crossed his mind. Now that it did...well...he was left in an odd state of confusion. He was just plain shocked that he would sit with three (obviously) gay people and dub them as friends. Some of his only friends at school as well. And why was he? Why were his friends okay with it too? And why didn’t they tell him earlier?Countless questions filled up his mind, swimming through the warmth of his high. He exhaled.
“Swimming in the darks alright”
“What do you think?” Danny blinked open his eyes. He felt his eyelashes feather at the arch of his brows. As he peered above at the cracks in the ceiling, the hazy hue melted away and circled around Kurtis’s peering gaze. His blue, dilated pupils were staring down at him. The shivers of his intimidating presence gyrated against his spine, the euphoric feeling of his high brewing in.
“About what?”
Kurtis let out a small chuckle. He settled down next to him, his palm pressing into the excess fabric of his shirt. The younger boy wiggled upright, letting the liquor bottle slip out of his grasp and onto the carpet as he rested his back against the sofa. “Max,” Danny gulped. “Who else would you be thinking about?”“Courtney. Jason. Matt--” he began to count with his fingers sarcastically. “--Roy,” he finished, making the other boy halt. Smirking, he proceeded to pat down Danny’s hair jokingly. “Jason and Matt are fucking in the other room. And Courtney...I don’t know, fucking Dan probably,” Danny gulped again, but his dry throat seemed to keep him from washing away his dumb expression. “Why are you so quiet tonight? Are you really hung up on what I said about Max?”Danny nodded reluctantly, tucking his chin into his chest to avoid Kurtis’s gaze. The older boy just shrugged and took a long sip of his beer. “I don’t know...I just really expected for him to be more supportive of everything,” he confessed. It was like the words were tumbling out of his lips. Like he was barely thinking about what he was saying, and instead, letting whatever came to him, spill out. “He just seemed like the type to…”“You’re homophobic too, aren’t you?” Danny snapped up at him, from a mixture of shock and worry. But he gathered from Kurtis’s face, that he worked that out a long time ago. “It was pretty easy to figure out. Jason caught on to it from day one and told me about it. I was a little worried when you sat with us on the first day to be honest. I didn’t think you would fit in but...I was wrong,” he looked over to him and grinned. “For once.”Danny chuckled. “I-It’s nothing personal, I swear,” Kurtis nodded nonchalantly, confusion Danny as to if he was sick of hearing bullshit or he was just piss drunk. “I know,” he hummed. “I’m working on it…” Danny pursed his lips. The older brunette seemed to just gesture to absolutely nothing as he wavered his hand over his lap. “Max says that too,” the junior let out a small “oh” and placed his hands onto his knees like some preparatory student. “It’s been years since he’s joined the group but...nothing seems to change,” Kurtis lowered his gaze. “I think it has something to do with his family; not that he’s out or anything,” the thought of it made Danny clasp his hands together tightly, his index fingers pressing into the gaps of his knuckles. “Or maybe…” he exhaled. Danny already expected for something worse. “Maybe he’s all up in his head or something. Like he usually is.”The younger boy dragged out a long sigh. Just like expected. He would have loved to say that he was better than that. That he was vibrant. Never in his head. That he was the perfect person to help out Max, like he did to him. But he couldn’t. Because he was the same. All up in his head until time passes past him. He couldn’t really tell if there was that slight tint of jealousy and pride fueling it. Max always seemed so quaint…? From a distance anyway. It’s not like he was socially infamous or anything like that, but Danny was no stranger to the name “Max Malanaphy” before he had joined their “gay cult” as he sometimes dubbed. He’d accompany Courtney in their school musicals; or in those weird Christian musicals that they held at church sometimes to try and convince you that Christianity is “hip and cool”. Danny never really understood why Courtney would join them. He would also help out Roy a few times with the plays and arrangements. He seemed to be into theatre. Probably would be a theatre kid too if he wasn’t so shy. And of course he received every notable academic award known to man. Sure there wasn’t exactly competition at the school so it wouldn’t be too hard, but hey, he seemed pretty smart. Now that he knew him, he knew for sure he was. “You too?” Danny shook his head and plastered on a smile. A lopsided smile. Probably looked really fake, and Kurtis was quick to notice it. “I can’t tell if you’re doing that ironically, or you’re just really high,” the younger brunette gestured jokingly, receiving a small chuckle from Kurtis as he lightly slapped Danny’s knee. Though it was more like a light sway. He was way too drunk to actually be bothered. “Well…” he gave a minimal shrug, small enough to hide it behind a shift in his position. He pulled his knee closely to his chest and hugged it tightly. “I mean...I can get lost in my own thoughts sometimes…”
Quite a lot actually.
“I get it,” he nodded. His gaze fell into the blur of the room. He first parted his lips to speak, but he only let out a sigh. Danny figured that it was probably his thoughts being clogged up. “...but sometimes I feel like you need to look around you, you know?” he began, his eyes lowering slightly. “When you're all up in your head, you forget to take in everything else because all you can hear are your thoughts,” he knocked the empty bottle onto the side table. It made a small “clank” sound as it toppled to its curved surface. “I'm not saying to trust everyone, but sometimes you need to take into account what other people say because they're a bystander. So they can see past all the shitty mist that builds up in your mind,” Kurtis glanced down at Danny and widened his smile to try and even out his lack of one. It was a little unevenly stretched out. Also lined with his tipsy nature but Danny took it in with a gracious gulp. “Just don't stress too much about it, okay?”Danny nodded half heartedly. He knew what he was saying. Paying attention to what people said was important, obviously. But actually believing in what they're saying...well that's the hard part. For him anyway. Especially when everyone seems to say something different constantly. He was a sinner, now he's apparently fine. Even though he's spent so much time hating himself, because everyone else hated him. Take everything into consideration what other people say, but you make the decision at the end of the day. The only problem. His own decision would change constsantly.
He could barely believe in himself for that long.
“It's not the end of the world if you make one little mistake, remember that,” he took his hand and squeezed it tightly. “We’re only in high school. What we do now is probably not going to affect us when we’re older.”Danny pressed his lips together and nodded. Mostly to get Kurtis’s harsh stare away from him. He slightly loosened the grip of his hand. “You getting tired?” the junior replied with a subtle nod. “Thought so. I'll drive you home.”He wondered if Kurtis felt slightly bad for him at the end of the day. Like, first of all, he didn't treat him like shit (unlike Matt and sometimes Max). Maybe it was because he was younger than them. But then again it could be because they're not that close yet, so they weren't at a “joking around” territory. It was probably really odd having someone new sit with them. Making the four a five. A really tight four an awkwardly bigger yet still accepting five. Kurtis also seemed to always give him a look. A certain look. His brows would furrow in slightly with his lips parted. Like he was trying to teach him something important. Danny speculated if it had something to do with his past. Like he made the wrong decisions. Or he went through the same thing. Or maybe he's looking too into it. Like he always is. Danny ran his hands over his jeans and faced Kurtis who was leaning over to his jacket which was hanging loosely at the back of a chair. Taking the key into his fingers, he glanced down at Danny with a wide smile. He really was like a mentor too. In a drunk, somewhat unsure and bitchy sort of way. But Danny loved it.
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
“Do you want to say bye to the couple?” Kurtis asked. He swirled his car keys around his index finger as he lazily swung a jacket over his shoulder.“Uhh...sure,” Danny hopped off of the sofa and approached the set of stairs, which he could barely make out because of the darkly lit basement. By the top of the staircase, darkness completely cloaked over his body, making it hard for him to travel up towards the living room. And he was drunk off of his mind, which made it hard to manuver his legs in a coordinated manner. He was somewhat thankful for Kurtis’s rich status. It meant booze, busy parents (equating to late nights), and his amazing house. He loved the way it was set out, with chic, modern paintings up on the walls and crystal clear floors. There always seemed to be a gentle breeze flowing through the large windows which made the feel all the more cozy. He was currently really thankful for his wide staircase too. The carpet was also soft which was a bonus. His drunken state left him weak and floppy, like his legs would move a second later than his thoughts. So Kurtis’s thankfully large set of stairs left him muttering a thank you as he ascended.
“Ah...Matt…”
Danny stiffened. His fingers traced around the door frame as he peeked out into the living room slightly. It was just open, to let a single shimmer of light shine in. Although it was somewhat dark, with the light being more of a deep yellow hue, it was easy to spot the two teenager sprawled across the large sofa.
“Fuck Jason,”
Matt steadied his body above him, his palms planting into the sides of his waist. Thrusting, in and out, muffled moans escaped Jason’s lips. Danny shivered. Their bare bodies were cloaked with a thin blanket, which hung loose by Matt’s lower back. Even so, the younger boy thought he was seeing too much. Way too much. It gave an odd tingling sensation through his body as he clutched onto the knob.
“Faster…”
Danny couldn't move. His eyes were fixated on the boys, who desperately linked onto each other. Jason had his fingers pressed into Matt’s forearms as he grinded against his hips. He replied with a grunt as he lowered to his neck, quickly showering him with small pecks down to his collarbones. This was too much. Way too much. Danny forcefully scattered away, his eyes still glued onto the couple. He hurriedly crawled back down to the basement and scrambled to find his composure. He slapped himself on the cheeks. He was burning. Embarrassment, awkwardness, excitement and nervousness all swirled within his stomach as he toppled to his sides. A little sense of desire and intrigue brewed itself into the mix, with the drunken high kicking him right by the chest. He felt nauseous, to say the least. Confused, to say the most. He just shook his head and rethought his route, which was to climb up another set of stairs leading to the front door. Aka a route that does not include the sightings of one of the gayest and confusing things Danny has ever seen. He gathered his thoughts and dashed for the other staircase, which swirled itself into the upper floor. He could just see Kurtis by the front door, leaning against the wood lazily with the keys in his hands. With his other, he held up his phone which his eyes were glued on. Danny ran as quickly as he could towards him, which mostly consisted of him wavering his arms around frantically and hoping that his legs would keep up with his hopeful pace. “Uhh you okay…?” Kurtis tucked away his phone into his jacket pocket and glanced down at the younger boy with confusion. “Y-Yeah,” he puffed out, running his hands through his hair like he was confident. Casual. Basically everything a normal person should be in this situation.“Did you run into them fucking?” Kurtis chortled, turning the knob. Pushing forward, he let the cold air seep in. When Danny hesitated to answer, the older boy snorted. “I’ve done that so many fucking times, you have no idea,” he unlocked the vehicle and gestured for Danny to follow him. “I make them vaccuum every inch of that room. Every single time. I swear to god, they’re a pair of horny motherfuckers.”“Has Max walked in on them?” Danny strapped the seatbelt around him. Kurtis howled out a laugh.“Yeah, like once. He was scarred for life though,” he snickered, letting the engine roar beneath them. “What happened?” he felt a small flutter of a chuckle by his chest. “He was snooping around the house, probably sick of my lazy-ass, and I think he tried to find some place to sleep. I’m pretty sure that it was one of the first sleepovers we had,” he laughed. “Oh shit, it’s been years man,” he slapped himself by the forehead. “Max stumbled into the living room and found Jason and Matt...you know.”“Y-Yeah…” Danny couldn’t really get the picture out of his mind. He couldn’t really figure out if it was gross or...intriguing? He’d spent so many years hating anything so “homo”. He forced himself to find it revolting but…He shook his head.“He literally screamed,” Danny smiled a little. “He sprinted back into the basement and, I swear to god, he had the most shocked expression ever. Like he saw a ghost or something,” he rolled his eyes. “Such a fucking drama queen. I can’t believe he’s not a theatre kid.”“I know right,” he grinned, turning over his body to face the driver. “He swore that he would never walk around the house by himself again. And he hasn’t to this day,” he exhaled, a grin spreading across his lips. “He can be so fucking dumb sometimes.”“But he’s still, like, the smartest person at school,” he noted. “That’s saying something.”“We’re all just asshats then,” he joked. “Come on, who voted Brad as school cap again?”“Well no one else did run,” he groaned. “And it’s a popularity contest anyway. Any guy who can provide that much booze is sure to win.”Kurtis cackled, nudging Danny’s shoulder with his knuckles lightly. He felt his smile widen. Like it was some sort of sign of approval from Kurtis. Or at least it felt like it. “I wanted Max to run, you know since he’s a decent human being and all, but he refused to. I mean, I know he’s shy and crap, but he could’ve actually done good stuff,” he babbled, gesturing with one hand. Danny gulped at his sudden lack of care for his driving. He had a history being a bad driver, and his state of mind was probably not the best. Being shit drunk and all. But he didn’t really want to bring it up. He would either try to gesture reassurance (which means he would care less about his actions), or nudge Danny again, maybe harder (which would equate to him being even more distracted). “Y-yeah...Max is really cool,” he chuckled nervously over, tightening his seat belt. He could feel his mind go a little fuzzy as he blinked to unfog his gaze.“I mean, would he filter himself? Yes. Maybe he’ll look less relatable and raw than he actually is, but he’ll still do great. He’s mature, kind, smart--” Kurtis’s gestures became more symphonic as he blabbered on about Max. He couldn’t really decipher if he was just really drunk or he was really into Max. Maybe both. Would it be too typical for everyone in the group to end up dating? Probably. Danny wouldn’t even want that to happen. He would be the fifth wheel, and he’s exposed to too much affection as it is. Especially with Matt and Jason just then.
“Danny?!”
The younger boy took a few deep breaths.“Are you even listening?” he had completely turned over to his side to face him. Okay. Now Danny was panicking. “Y-Yeah I am,” he eyed the road. Thank god for the empty street. “What was I talking about then, huh? What was I talking about?” his left hand loosely cupped over the wheel, the other reaching out towards Danny to flick him on the forearm playfully. Except all the other boy could do as a reply was to chuckle awkwardly. “Y-Your love for Max,” he plastered on a smirk and wriggled away from Kurtis’s grasp. “Ew,” he boomeranged back into his own seat and shook his head. Looked a little too over the top for his usual face of disgust. Danny giggled. His flustered state was something he’d never seen, and he thought it was kind of...adorable…? Nah, he would never admit to that. Funny. Yeah, let’s say that. “He is not my type.”“What is your type?” he jabbed on further.“I don’t know. Older? Silver fox or something. Greying hair can be attractive, right? Mature--” he rambled on, his wrist twirling around. Like he was gesturing to absolutely nothing. Honestly, it looked like he was spewing out bullshit.“You literally just described Max,” Danny butted in, cackling at the top of his lungs when Kurtis froze. The older boy slammed his heel onto the brakes and swerved to the side of the road. “Oh fuck off!” he shoved Danny’s back. His voice sounded more like a whine then a shout, and it made the brunette laugh even louder. “It’s true!” he pulled back, whacking Kurtis by the shoulder. He began to chime into the laughter as he gasped over dramatically and snorted.“I don’t go on and on about your love for Roy,” he teased back, Kurtis knocking down Danny’s confident a few notches. He regained his usual, self-assured manner and continued. “Come on, we’ve all noticed! You try and stare at him every lunch, you know, if we actually see him.”“Fuck off Kurtis,” he grumbled. “This isn’t some typical, teen drama. I’m not crazy in love with Roy, and I won't ever get with him.”“And I won’t go out with Max,” he cocked a shoulder and faced the wheel again, like he drew out a win. “...really…?” he asked in a quiet voice, his words lined finely with mischief.“Yes,” he answered with a straight face.“...are you sure…?” he poked.“I mean, I might kiss him but-” “Well, do it,” Kurtis widened his eyes, shock completely washing over his face. Danny’s unusually assured expression met Kurtis’s stunned one.“I thought you were--” he shook his head and gulped. “...nevermind…”Danny glossed over Kurtis’s words, already coming back at full force with his comment. His eyes widened slightly at the excitement building up within him.“You totally should! I would pay money to see that shit,” he nudged on further, with Kurtis feebly replying with mixed emotions. He couldn’t really decipher if he should agree; and bump his confidence that much higher, though it would have a lot of side effects later on; or disagree, which would strike at his ego, though it would be easier to do so. Danny’s eyes were basically beaming with enthusiasm. Kurtis groaned. “Fine, but--”Danny bursted out into laughter.“In front of everyone in the group too. Oh shit! It would be hilarious to see their reactions,” he laughed. Kurtis replied with a timid chuckle. “Sure whatever,” he tried to brush off in a smooth manner. He returned his gaze towards the road as Danny sat back in his seat, his aura much more upbeat than it was before. Danny finally drew out a win. A win to fucking Kurtis too. Who would have guessed?He smiled to himself. Maybe he was slowly inserting himself into Kurtis’s good books. He seemed comfortable enough around him. But then again, it could be the alcohol talking, which wasn’t that unlikely of a reason. Did he care? Not really. He just wanted to fit into the group. Fit in with the people who seemed to care about and accept him the most out of this whole stinking town. Danny finally found decent people to hang out with. He couldn’t fuck this up anymore.And he knew he was going in the right direction. He glanced up at Kurtis with a wide smile. Maybe he isn’t as fucked as he once thought.
“Uh wait...Danny…”
He pulled over to the side of the road and looked over to him, somewhat concerned.“Yeah?” he peered over. “Where even is your house?” Danny raised an eyebrow.“Didn’t I tell you?” he received a shake of the head as a reply.“I’ve been driving around the block for an hour now. I just realised that I forgot to ask.”
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
“Why are you back so late?”Shit. Ok, maybe Danny should have thought through the consequences before he ditched school. He doubts that his mom actually checked his attendance record, so he would be fine there. But being back at 2AM? Now that was a hard one to slip past. She was currently sitting by the lounge room table, her eyes glued on the TV screen and a magazine stuck to her hands. “Umm…” Danny pulled a straight face, hoping that his mom wouldn't smell the alcohol stained to his jacket. Surely she wouldn't pick up on his wheezy behaviour, right? “I can't believe that Roy would let you stay over for that long,” he widened his eyes. “I really need to apologise to him and his family.”“O-Oh no it's okay,” he gestured. “I'll do it for you. Y-Yeah, I'll write a monologue and everything.”His mom laughed. “I just want you to get a good sleep, okay?” She rolled her eyes. “Roy already explained to me that he was helping you study. And though it's somewhat hard for me to believe that you were studying for a half yearly maths exam, I know that Roy doesn't lie.”Danny smiled to himself. Thank god for Roy having his back. “Ha, night mom.”He tried to sweep his state of mind (aka being piss drunk) under the rug as he slammed the door behind him. He was honestly so relieved to enter his own room. It felt cozy and comfortable, and everything he needed right now. Domestic bliss.
DANNY: thanks Roy
He texted into his phone, switching his bedside lamp on.
ROY: for covering your ass?
ROY: no problem
Danny chuckled.
DANNY: yeah...sorry for that
ROY: where were you anyway?
DANNY: Kurtis’s with Matt and Jason
ROY: getting piss drunk?
Danny halted. Would Roy get mad at him for drinking? Maybe. Danny didn't want to see his bad sides, or for him to get mad. He really didn't want that. Would he tell Courtney? That's a somewhat likely chance. They're in a few of the same classes, and plus, they've been a three for so long. He knows how overprotective Courtney can be at times.
ROY: from your lack of an answer, I'm guessing you did
Danny gulped.
ROY: Court will get mad
ROY: you know?
He sighed.
DANNY: yeah
DANNY: I know
He could already imagine it. Courtney's pissed off face. Sure she was pretty, but her angry face was still something to fear. He feared it ever since it was little. He swore that he could see his life flash before his eyes every time the Australian's face pulsed a bright red.
ROY: but I have your back
Was it too predictable for him to feel his heart flutter when he read it? Probably. It didn't stop him though. He didn't even realise his fingers locking up against the home and lock button. Before he knew it, he had swiftly pressed down, screenshotting his said comment. He flustered a deep red. He didn't really mean to. Well. Subconsciously he probably did. But no going back now.
DANNY: thanks Roy
ROY: no worries
DANNY: why are you up so late anyway?
DANNY: well, early, I guess
Danny glanced over to the time at the top of the screen. 2:14AM. Great. There was no way he could stay awake through school now. Not that he usually does anyway.
ROY: working on a script
He imagined that he would say it nonchalantly alongside a small shrug. But Danny couldn’t really take it. He knew that he was tired and overworked. He wished that he could take a break sometimes. 'Perfectionist' seemed like an understatement when it came to Roy. Always working on and improving whatever he was doing. Danny wondered if he grew apart because he became too busy. Or maybe he blended into the background too much. Blended into the things that don’t matter anymore to him. Who knows.
DANNY: you should go to bed
DANNY: it’s getting late
ROY: you mean, too early?
He chuckled. Yes, he knew it wasn’t revolutionarily funny. Yes, he found everything that Roy says funny. And yes, he knew that he was into Roy a little too much sometimes.
ROY: I’ll go to bed when you do
ROY: you need a rest too
Danny was probably looking into it too much, but he didn’t care. He didn’t even bother to try and wipe off his smile. Roy cared. Maybe just a little. But who the fuck cares? It meant a lot to him.
DANNY: OK
DANNY: goodnight
ROY: goodnight
He switched off his phone and placed it on his bedside table, reaching over to the lamp to turn it off. He glanced at his phone one more time.
ROY: have a good sleep
His heart was thumping fast. Was this the world teasing him? Or punishing him? Well he was taking the bait. Quickly.
DANNY: you too
Was he looking into it too much? Once again? He screenshot it anyway. Yes, again. Maybe he can look over it with a clear head in the morning and judge it better. Well. That was his excuse anyway.
ROY: see you in a few hours
ROY: ;)
DANNY: bye
He wondered if his photo album would be filled with just screenshots of Roy’s texts, because he didn’t hesitate to take another one. Damn. He was too obvious about his feelings for him. Jason had nothing on this. Matt and Jason who? Maybe his layers and layers of hatred for “homo” things are slowly wiping away. With the exposure from the group. Or maybe he was still a little tipsy. Probably a mixture of both.But either way, he appreciated Roy looking after him. A lot. He seemed to always have his back. Caring for him even after all these years. Maybe he didn’t forget about him after all.He smiled. He remembered what Roy looked like when they first met. By far, the earliest memory he had. Well it wasn’t the very, very first time they met. Apparently, their families have been close. Being neighbours and all. Legend has it that his mom offered cookies to them when she was baking. All those years ago. When his dad was around…And she offered some to the neighbouring household, though she’s never met them. Apparently they hit it off right away. Became friends with the couple on the spot. Which explains Roy and Danny meeting the moment they were old enough to interact. His mom’s told him that Roy and him met when he was a couple of weeks old, but neither one of them could remember it. Obviously. They were too young.So Danny would, instead, count the first time they met as their encounter at age three. He wondered why he could even remember it. This clearly too. Though he saw him through the living room window sometimes, he had never exchanged a word to him until a neighbourhood gather one July afternoon. I mean, they could barely speak period, but nevermind that. He was dressed up in a cute pair of yellow jeans, matched with suspenders and a blue polo shirt. Man, he was the most adorable toddler. Along with a navy bowtie and a checkered Ascot cap, he won Danny over from the start. His dimples seemed to never leave his cheeks either. It wasn’t a romantic connection or anything, since they’re three and they could barely wrap their heads around the concept of colours, but he felt a weird connection. A friendly connection. Like the world was telling him that they would be friends. He remembered their first handshake, having to uncomfortably shift his hand from his pockets of his overalls to in front of him. His mom had taught him to always be polite by showing a sign of happiness. So he smiled.“Hello, my name is Danny,” his voice was higher pitched, and much more slurred. He could barely pronounce his own name.“Hi Danny! I’m Roy,” he shook it firmly. Something he’s known to do to this day. He was proper and nice mannered. Even though he was only a year older, he always seemed to be more mature than Danny, like already having the ability to pronounce his words semi-properly and standing tall. He never left his side after that. For years and years. Even at preschool. Oh man. He found himself so embarrassing. He cried when Roy left preschool because they couldn’t hang out every day anymore. The 2 soon became a 3 when Courtney came over from Australia, and they’ve been notoriously tight throughout the small town. Neighbourhood gathers were always hilarious looking back because other, much older couples would laugh at them. Joyfully of course. Saying that only one could date Courtney and three’s would be awkward when they grow up. With puberty and all.Well guess what? No one’s going to date Courtney. She’s a lesbian. And Danny wouldn’t want to anyway. He’s gay. He felt his chest flutter. Was that a confession? Did he finally confess to himself? That he’s...gay…? Well, there’s no use denying it now. Even though he has been for years. It felt good. Great, actually. Unbelievably great. He’s said it before with Courtney but...it felt different. It felt right. Because he was fine with it. Yeah he said it. And he didn’t want to hold back saying it again. He was gay. And he was...slightly proud of that. He giggled. Maybe he and Roy would be a thing. In his dreams. That would be funny though. Somewhat ironic. He would jab it at all those stupid couples. Fuck them. Fuck the world. He sounded like such an angsty teen. But he felt confident. He was sick and tired of fighting against a stupid and close minded world. He wanted to escape. He said it before. With Roy and Courtney. Now, maybe with Jason, Matt, Kurtis and Max. And well, if Courtney’s coming, he had to bring along Willam. If that's the case, Alaska had to come along. If the rumours are true, Sharon too. Damn. That would be one big group. But it's hate-free...if Roy can stand to be around that many people. No homophobia though. Now that would be the life. Roy confused him. There always seemed to be more sides to him than what he shows. Or maybe it’s his smug expression, who knows? He came off as slightly homophobic when they were at their school that night. Months ago. But then again, he said that he could learn to accept it.And maybe Danny was being overdramatic and paranoid, but he swore that he looked at him in a certain way. A way that he perceived as a sign of “I know you’re gay and have slight feelings for me and I’m okay with that”. He was probably being too much of a conspiracy theorist. Looking too into it. But he couldn’t help but to think it sometimes. Him and Roy were…complicated, in his eyes. Or, it seemed complicated to him, but not for Roy. Nothing was that complicated for Roy.He never seemed to cause any trouble for anyone. He would mind his own business until someone else asked for it. If that was the case, he would tear them down to shreds with his quick and witty humour. You would expect him to be a lot more popular, since he’s liked and all, but Danny guessed that the two don’t tend to link together. In high school social hierarchy anyway. He was also quiet, responsible and incredibly smart. Also specialised in problem solving, so if there was to be a problem, he could whip up a solution. So he wasn’t bothersome. To anyone. Except Danny. Because he couldn't fucking get him out of his mind. “Argh, I need to get to sleep…” he groaned to himself, clutching the sides of his forehead as he lightly rocked sideways. His bed felt too hot by then, trapping all his breaths underneath the covers. He sprayed his legs on top of the blankets and stared at the ceiling. It wasn’t even 2:30 yet. He was starting to give up. His eyes scanned the room in front. It was somewhat of a mess; with a few piles of clothes tossed into the corners, a couple of his binders fanned open across his rug, and used issues parading around his bin after his miss. But he liked to think that it gave it character. And it was organised. Somewhat. In his own way. A single sketchbook laid on his loveseat at the corner of the room. On top was a pencil, its end barely sharpened and its eraser dirty. He hadn’t touched it for years. He never really thought of using it for years.He hopped out of bed and approached it, scooping the book into his hands to then take a seat. It’s always felt so soft by his back, though there seemed to be less space between him and the arms of the chair. He still remembers how his legs used to dangle, the tips of his toes barely scraping onto the ground. He laughed at the thought. He opened the book and flicked through the pages. The first few were rough. Like he could barely grasp onto the pencil properly. But then it slowly got better. Uneven and harsh lines eventually became shapes. Smears of led became shading. And oddly drawn polygons became characters. He paused. The infamous “mood ring” incident. He chuckled. It had been so long since he looked over his character. It was only half done, and the ends of her body were smudged. Most likely because of the whole park scene. But it still looked as familiar as ever. “It’s Adore…” Danny mumbled to himself. He had completely forgotten about the character he’d drawn all those years ago. Like that intricate part of the story was missing. But it seemed to fit itself into the puzzle again, filling the empty void. He looked back. It was around a year after Courtney and him created “Adore”. Around the “lecture” he was given. It was repressed in his memory so far down, that he could barely remember his own feelings. Only a small tingle by his fingertips. But he figured that little Danny was still in love with Adore. In love with being Adore. But he had to keep it a secret. Stay in hiding. Or he’ll get in trouble again. And he really didn’t want to get hurt again. He held the pencil within his fingers. Flicking to a fresh page, he began to sketch a curved line, which eventually morphed into a circle, which transformed itself into a figure.
‘The largest eyes, with the longest eyelashes flattering up and down like wings’
He followed along his vivid imagination of her.
‘She had sharp, dark eyebrows, which were so bold and strong, fuelling him with confidence, yet rich and milky, calming him in an almost dream-like state’
He remembered the way she looked in front of him. It felt surreal.
‘The way his red lips glistened in the light; he couldn’t get enough of it.’
There she was. Right in front of him. Her delicate yet striking face. As clear as ever. It looked like she was smiling back at him happily with a twinkle in her eye. Something that he imagined himself as looking, before the hellstorm. She had the most beautiful locks, trickling down past her waist. Like it was tossed in the wind freely. He envisioned them as ruby red, the pearly colour glossy and shiny, just like her lips. He wondered how Roy would react to Adore. Not him being Adore, but if Adore was an actual person. Maybe he would like her a lot. Maybe spend a few nights together. Laughter. Smiles. Wouldn’t be surprised if they would ever fall in love. He wishes. He felt happier when he was Adore. She was more fun. More childish. More playful. More charming. Everything he wishes he had the confidence to be. He missed it. He missed her. He missed being her.
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
“Okay, I hate to be the one who says it but…”
It was the first break, and Danny barely crawled his way through the first two periods. He was exhausted. He could barely keep his eyes open, and Jay was quick to notice it during physics. Not only was he his “ex-best friend” (so he knew what he looked like when he could barely stand up) and was insistent on bugging him, but he was a complete dick about it too. ‘What were you doing?’. ‘I saw you leave the school’. ‘You shouldn’t be hanging out with them’. ‘Is it because you think they’re cool?’. ‘Because they’re obviously not’. ‘They’re just faggots’. Danny cringed at each word, but all he did was coward away to the furthest section of his chair and think of other things to flush away his complaining. Jay knew nothing. Absolutely nothing. He shouldn’t be spewing out so much bullshit.
“You look dead Danny. You look dead.”
Kurtis was (of course) the one who poked the comment towards him. All the other group members glanced over, each having an expression of their own. Though all seemed to fall into the negative side of the spectrum. Max seemed concerned. Like his usual motherly stance was kicking in, and all he wanted to do was to make him feel better. Jason looked shocked. Like that weird shocked state where his mouth hangs open and it looks as if he wants to chuckle but he’s holding it back because he wants to be polite. But he ends up snorting a little anyway. And Matt? He just gave one quick look over, gave the look of absolute appall, and looked away again like nothing happened. This was bad news.“I-I didn’t get to sleep last night,” he confessed, rubbing the back of his neck. “Yeah...sorry for dropping you off at like 2AM,” Kurtis let out a small chuckle. Danny just gestured reassurance.“But 2AM isn’t too bad. I mean, if you live around the block and school starts at 8,” Jason pointed out.“Well you wouldn’t know what it’s like, would you? You and your fuck buddy over here--” Kurtis jabbed his index finger over to Matt who sarcastically waved back. “--fell asleep the moment you came. Literally.”They both flushed a bright red. Max pinched the top of his nose from disgust.“Do you mind being so vulgar?” he rolled his eyes, crossing his arms by his chest.“No, no I don’t,” he smirked, returning to his earlier topic. “Maybe next time you can NOT stay over at my house.”“Your parents were away anyway,” Jason fought.“Yeah, but I had to clean after your hungover mess,” he protested back. “This is why we need Max.”“Yeah you do,” he grinned confidently, cocking a shoulder over and snickering towards the slightly fuming Kurtis. “Okay, I got it,” Jason began. “What if we hang out at my place this time. Saturday. Around 6. My parents are out on some “business meeting”. I’m pretty sure they’re just going to have a “night by themselves”. This time 'round, I won’t drink, and you-” he pointed towards Kurtis, who raised an eyebrow as a reply. “-can get as shitfaced as you want. Make out with someone if you have to,” just then, Kurtis and Danny shared a quick glance, like a note to an earlier conversation. That conversation. In the car. So Kurtis did remember. “Just make sure it’s not Matt. I’ll clean everything up. Promise.”“You got yourself a deal,” Kurtis shrugged nonchalantly, shaking his hand firmly. “And Max, you can tag along this time,” Matt teased, widening his smile as Max thinned his lips. “I’d rather--”“You don’t have to do anything,” Danny butted in. Half because he was done with the topic, and half because he felt bad for Max. Sometimes, it seemed like they were trying to peer pressure him into doing everything. And Danny had definitely been there (mostly because of Jay and his girlfriend’s everlasting excitement for absolutely everything), so he wanted to cut him some slack. This guy deserved a break, in his eyes. “If you don’t want to...you don’t have to.”He pressed his lips together. He wondered if it was too much. Like, this wasn’t his event. Jason just whipped it up on the spot, and he wasn’t really supposed to be involved. But from Matt’s somewhat subtle smile, he felt a little more at ease.“Yeah, he’s right,” Matt backed him up. “Max, you don’t have to come if you don’t want to. But,” he swung his arm around Jason’s shoulder, reeling him in closely to his chest. “I know Jason really wants you there,” the younger brunette batted his eyelashes and pouted jokingly. “And you know how upset I will be if Jason’s not happy.”Max sighed.“I will come,”
“Hell yeah!”
The three rejoice happily, high-fiving each other and fist pumping enthusiastically. Danny chuckled at their childish state, alongside Max who seemed to relax his shoulders. “But I'm doing absolutely nothing, got that?” Max received four solid nods. “Good.”“I might make a small stop before that though,” Kurtis eyed Jason, who widening his smile excitedly. He returned with a look that Danny interpreted as a prologue to some sort of shitstorm that they were ready to call upon. It seemed vaguely similar to the look of confidence they gave each other the moment before...the whole Brad thing. Which Danny would like to forget about. “I have somewhere to go. And I think it'll be pretty fun if you all come with me.”Matt raised an eyebrow. “Umm...sure…” he seemed somewhat skeptical. He eyed Jason, who overdramatically shrugged. It made him all the more suspicious. “Are you planning something?”“I mean, it’s a little something, but it’s basically nothing,” he was quick to brush off. “Why don’t we meet at school around 4? Then head off,” Jason suggested, his lines coming off much more rehearsed and robotic compared to his usual tone. Danny was doubtful of what was to come. But he either didn’t care; figuring it wasn’t that big of a deal; or he was tired, because he didn’t bother to fight about against Jason’s obvious mischief. He just nodded along with it.“Okay…” Matt still seemed unconvinced, but when Jason pursed his lips and frowned slightly, he quickly collected his thoughts and plastered on a smile. He went as far as to nod cheerfully and kick away any lingering thoughts of doubt.“Tomorrow will be fun, promise,” Jason giggled into his chest, pulling him in tightly.Danny narrowed his eyes. There was something going on. They were making it ridiculously obvious. And he was a little scared of what this was going to be.***Danny had already said that he didn’t need a ride home, since he only lived a few hundred metres away, but Kurtis, for some reason, persisted and persisted today. “You look like you're dead. Even more so than you did at lunch,” he kicked open the door and flashed his vacant passenger seat. “And I don’t even know how that’s possible.”He reluctantly took it. Not only did he feel bad for saying no, especially because Max was off to band that day so no one would accompany Kurtis, but he was also dying from exhaustion. He had the worst body clock of all time. It never let him adjust to any slight changes in his sleep schedule, meaning he had to strictly go to bed around the same time every day to skip his body shutting down on him. It was annoying. To say the least.“So how was school?” Danny felt like some little ten year old kid on his trip home from primary school. “Tiring,” he confessed, glancing down at his phone. 3:22PM. He swore that it should have been around 5PM. “Cute lock screen,” Kurtis teased, making Danny somewhat self conscious. He quickly switched it off and shoved it back into his pocket. “You seem like the type to be into Pierce the Veil.”He somewhat cringed. At himself. What kind of kid had lyrics for “King for a day” plastered onto some sort of Tumblr aesthetic as their lock screen? Apparently this stupid “Sad Boy” over here. “You wanna plug in your phone?” Kurtis reached over and dug his hands into Danny’s pockets. He was slightly taken back. “I would love to listen to your songs.”“Umm...I don't know…” his fingers met his wrist. “I want to know what you're into,” he edged closer. “Look, if you're scared that I won't like your songs, I've listened to Max’s for three hours. He had classical music on his Spotify,” Danny chuckled. “So that's a yes…?”“Okay, fine,” he reluctantly gave away his device. “B-But first, can we park to the side of the road,” his history of crashing cars was really getting the better of him. Kurtis raised an eyebrow and swerved by a couple of similar looking houses (but don’t they all look similar anyway around here?). “I-I just heard the story from Matt, that’s all. About the after party last year?”Kurtis groaned.“He told you that story?” Kurtis flipped over the phone so Danny could quickly type in the passcode. Meanwhile, he seemed to mutter some sort of curse under his breath, probably directed towards Matt. “It’s nothing to worry about,” he began to scroll through his folders. “I was just drunk, and it was a long night, and everyone was basically drunk.”He went on and on. Danny couldn't help but to laugh a little at his bullshitting. It was slightly adorable, really. How he gestured wildly and snuck a few “umm”s and “uhh”s as he thought of his next lie. “Oh hey,” Kurtis dragged out a smirk. This wasn’t going to be good. “I was going to flick away the tab but…” he turned the phone to face the screen over to him. Danny’s jaw dropped. “Is this from Roy?”Danny’s body numbed. He tried to muster out thousands and thousands of excuses as soon as possible. ‘I accidentally did it’. ‘I didn’t notice’. ‘What’s that?’.“I-It’s not what it looks like,” --and he ended up saying the absolute worst excuse. The one that makes you look more guilty somehow. “You don’t need to hide your unbelievably obvious feelings for him,” Kurtis smirked. Danny hated it. “I-I didn’t really…” he was lost for words. He couldn’t even make sense of what was going on.“It’s some cute shit,” he snickered. “Does he really send this stuff?” he looked over to him, his eyes wide and circular with intrigue. Danny gulped and nodded reluctantly. “I barely knew he had feelings,” he laughed again, this time much more airy. “He must care about you a lot.”“You’re shitting me Kurtis,” he mumbled under his breath. The older boy raised an eyebrow. “...I-I mean...he’s straight. I know it. He knows it. Everyone knows it.”“Naw Danny,” he started up the car, joining his route once again. His tone was playful and joking. Borderline sarcastic. Danny laughed a little. “I ship it though.”“...same…” they giggled together like some gossiping school girls.“Go pick a song,” he nudged over the phone. “Maybe that song you sang at the “neighbourhood Christmas party” that Roy goes on and on about,” Danny rolled his eyes as he scrolled through the countless songs on Spotify. “It must be great if he keeps talking about it.”“It was years ago! I don’t remember what I sang,” that was a lie. It was ‘Last Christmas’. Typical, he knows, but it was all he could come up with at the age of eight. Then, it was ‘Baby it’s Cold Outside’ which he performed with Courtney when he was 10 and she was 11. He wasn’t dumb. Ever since that incident with “Adore”, he had to somehow show the neighbourhood that ‘he wasn’t crazy’ and ‘he was most definitely not gay whatsoever’. Though singing isn't the most heteronormative thing ever. Actually, the more he thought about it, it was the complete opposite. No wonder they think that he's full blown gay. “Well? Go play your Emo rock music,” Kurtis edged on. Danny rolled his eyes and chuckled. “Fine,” he pressed 'I write Sins not Tragedies' (yes, the nationally regarded anthem of emo's everywhere other than Welcome to the Black Parade) and locked his phone. Kurtis hummed. “Uhh...let me guess,” he tapped his chin. “Is it MCR?” Danny shook his head. He found it entertaining; an incredibly stereotypical gay guessing his punk rock music. But then again, how did he not know Panic! At the Disco? "Is it Panic?” Danny nodded enthusiastically. “Knew it. Sharon’s a big fan of the genre.”Danny swallowed at the name. Was he just compared to the gothic, supposedly-lesbian back seater? He didn’t really know how to react to that. “She’s A-Alaska’s friend. Right?” probably more than friends, from what he’s heard. “Yeah. You heard about the rumours?” Damn. He caught on. “A little. Just from Roy,” he grinned. “Well, I believe it,” he shrugged. “From what I've seen anyway. Haven't you seen them around?” Danny shook his head. “Well, it looks weird at first. A cheerleader and a goth. I mean, this isn’t Glee or anything. It’s not what you expect here.”He eased towards Danny’s house, gradually breaking until he had stopped right in front of his entrance door. He gave a small nod of confidence at his perfection as he eyed the younger boy escaping his car.“You better turn up tomorrow. 4. School. Got it?” Danny replied with a nod. “Cool. See ya later.”He waved tiresomely as he sped away (like always). Danny wondered how long it would be until Kurtis got fined with a speeding ticket. He should probably be thankful for having that job.
“Welcome home Dan-”
She paused. Danny just gestured nonchalantly. Like a mix between a wave and an 'I'm going upstairs to sleep and rethink my life decisions'. “Did you sleep last night?” he shrugged as a reply. He seemed to blackout after his sketching. “Well, someone’s here to see you.”“Hi Danny!” By his living room was someone who he thought would never be here. Waiting in his living room. Now sipping tea from one of his mum's relatively new cups which she never gets out unless there's a visitor. Especially now. Because of what happened.
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
“Jay?” Danny rubbed his eyes and then glanced over everything. Jay (his happily dubbed “ex-best friend”) was sitting in the living room with his mom. Both sipping tea out of “special cups” (as his mom called it sometimes. Basically it means that they’re for guests) and chatting over the coffee table. On top were large plates filled with pastries, all nicely decorated with creamy white frosting. Shit. His mom went all out on this.Does she know that they’re not friends anymore? Fuck. Did Danny tell her who he’s been hanging out with?“Jay said that he really wanted to see you,” his mom explained, lowering the cup onto the table in front. “Well, I’ll head upstairs, now that you’re here. Have fun you two.”As his mom dashed upstairs, he took over her spot. Near Jay. Way too close for his liking. He reeked of bad news.“So…” Danny began, lifting one of the clean cups from the tray. As he began to pour himself some earl grey, he could see Jay plaster on a casual smile. “...what brings you here?”“I just wanted to come around and say hi,” he piped. He clasped his hands together over his lap like a nominee for the next ‘Student of the Year’ award.
Fake.
Danny knew of his fake tendencies. Sort of like a teacher’s pet at times. Other times, more like a poser. He learnt to accept it…? Sort of. Well, sometimes. In that moment, he definitely didn’t. “You never have before,” Danny argued, the cup hovering by his pursed lips. “Well, I never needed to before because we sat together at school,” he shrugged. “I don’t really see you that much anymore. And I thought we were best friends.”Danny crinkled his brows. He swore that there was more to this. More to why he’s here.“I still see you around,” he said firmly. “I saw you last period.”“Gia told me that you’re still hanging out with those guys,”There it is. Danny took a small sip and lowered it into his palm. He was slightly less annoyed, now that he cracked the code. But still pretty stiff, since Jay was here, inserting himself into a situation that doesn't involve him. Whatsoever.“Yeah. What’s it to you?” he fought, his voice reaching a crescendo. Jay cowered back a little onto the back of his seat. It made the air between them that much denser.“N-Nothing. I’m just worried,” he mumbled, wrapping his jacket over him. “You know they have a...reputation, I guess.”“Do they? Because you don’t see them around school much. I mean, I didn’t know about them until I met Jason,” as Jay parted his lips to speak, Danny continued. “What kind of reputation does Kurtis have anyway?""Well a--""Nothing other than "gay" or "fag" which is what Brad loves to say to him," he slammed the cup onto the table. Jay flinched. "Jason is a boy cheerleader, yeah, but is he a big deal at school? Only sometimes. When Brad it involved," he groaned at the name."Matt’s a football player, sure, but is he a lot more than that? Yeah. The only "reputation" he has is a good one, maybe slightly more negative because of his friends or whatever. But he means no harm. He's a great guy," Jay glanced away. "You probably heard of Max a few times at the award ceremonies, but you never heard about him,” he rolled his eyes. “I swear, they have reputations glued onto them like some prison label but you know nothing about them! No one does! No one really even hears anything about them except fucked up rumours probably spread by one of you guys," he pointed directly towards Jay's chest."You know, you make it sound like they’re dangerous rebels who can’t be trusted. But number one, you don’t even hear that much about them as individuals. And number two, you don’t know them personally. But I do. And they’re just normal people who want to live their normal lives but fucking Brad has to go out of his way just to torment them. Because he’s a dick like that. And all of you people support it.”“We don’t Dan-”“But you do! Because all you do is stand there and watch. Gasp if you’re bothered,” he locked into strong eye contact with him. “You’re the ones who developed this “reputation” around them because you love to do nothing but gossip. But you know what? They’re actual people. Living, breathing people. And they deserve a lot more than that.”He took one big inhale and a long exhale as he finished his rant. He never expected himself to go all out like that. Especially to Jay. But he couldn’t really help it. He was fuming.“I…” he was lost for words. ‘For once’, Danny thought, taking one more sigh before he scanned him up and down. No. He didn’t look fine. Jay didn’t look like his usual self. Danny gulped. It was like his boiling blood had cooled down that instant with a cooling inhale. “S-Sorry…” he shook his head. “I’m just sick and tired of--”“I know,” Jay cut him off with a small nod. “I’m sorry too. For coming all the way here.”He steadied himself up, looking as if he was still confused. Startled. His knees were buckling slightly and it looked as if he forgot how to walk for a singular moment. Like all his thoughts were focusing on something else. Dashing away from Danny’s gaze, he wandered outside without a single goodbye.Danny sat there for a while. Eyes wide open and lips parted.
“So I’m guessing you aren’t friends anymore…?”
His mom popped her head into the room and strolled over to the vacant space next to him. “It’s not like that,” he shook his head. “We are still friends it’s just…”“Complicated,” she finished it off for him. “I get it,” she ran her hands down her skirt to smooth it out against her legs. “You didn’t tell me you made new friends though.”“What did Jay say about them?” his voice was low. He felt a flutter of nerves by his chest. “He talked non-stop about them,” she explained. He gulped. “What are their names? Jason? Max…? Matt…? The fourth one?”“It’s Kurtis, mom,” his mom gasped a little and continued. He rolled his eyes. She was overemphasising. Maybe she was excited for what she was going to say next. “Oh right! Kurtis. Yeah. I don’t know much about them. I know Jay likes to overdramatize what’s really going on, so I can't make much judgement on them,” she shrugged nonchalantly. “But didn’t he say more…? You know?” she had to know what he was hinting at. Right?“You mean about their sexuality?” Danny blinked. “Yeah, he went on about it for a while.”“W-What did he say...?”Danny couldn’t help but to feel so worried. The topic was so...taboo. Taboo to talk about anyway. Everything was much easier when it was internal. When it was just himself. “Something about how they’re all gay. Maybe dangerous for Danny’s environment or something. Hell, I don’t think he should tell me how to raise my own kid,” she rolled her eyes. “But anyway. He seemed pretty worried about you.”“But…” he glanced down. He felt like he couldn’t face his own mom in the face. His hands were trembling slightly in his grasp. Fuck. Breathe. Don’t forget to breathe. “...do you think I should hang out with them?”“If you like them,” she said it so simply. Danny pursed his lips. “Is that it?”“Yeah. Friends are for you to choose. They don’t seem too bad. Jason’s a cheerleader, which is something different for a boy to do,” Danny held his breath. “But that’s not bad a thing. Good on him for doing something different,” he took a quick exhale.“And I heard that Matt’s a football player. Is he friends with Brad?” he cringed at the name, but he managed to nod slightly.“I’ve seen Max a few times at the award ceremonies. Remember that time you got that music award?”“Y-Yeah I do…” he rubbed the back of his neck. It was an odd mixture. A feeling of wanting to edge her to answer his question...even though he didn’t have the guts to say it. And flattery that she still remembered. Even though it felt like it was his only achievement ever in school.“And Kurtis is a friend of Roy’s, right? I think I’ve seen his artwork set up at those school performance nights,” she continued to ramble. Danny felt a little more at ease. At least she didn’t hate them. Luckily. Since Jay was probably spewing out bullshit to her. “So you like them…?” he received a confident nod. “I guess. I mean, I don't hate them,”This is it. He had to insert the question here. Or else he wouldn’t get a chance again in...maybe a while. A long while.“Even though they’re…?” he trailed off. Damn it.“Gay?” she managed to end it for him again. “Yeah,” he muttered. She smiled widely.“I knew it,” confusion washed over his face. “You’re gay, aren’t you?” he felt his chest drop. “No! I’m just saying--”“Stop making this awkward Danny, I know that you are,” she laughed. “Is this your way of coming out?”“No, I--”“Because it’s a given,”He paused.“What?”“You showed up to a Christmas gather in drag honey. It’s a given,” she gestured. "B-But you were upset that night…” he fumbled with his thumbs. “I wasn’t upset at you,” she rubbed her palm against his shoulder soothingly. “I hope you didn’t think that I was.”He bit down on his lip.“Oh…” is all he could muster up. He took a death breath.“So you're not…?”“Mad? Of course not,” she sounded sympathetic. “I'm actually mad at myself for letting you see me cry like that,” he laughed like it was alright, but Danny couldn't help but to feel a tad guilty. It was his fault, after all. “I couldn't help it. No child deserved to be yelled at like that. Honestly.”“I-its okay,” he chuckled a little. He was slightly unsure, but when his mom smiled over at him warmly, it made him feel like everything was going to be okay. “Does it feel better now? Coming out and all?” Danny nodded excitedly. “That's good,” there was a slight pause. “...so…” a smirk spread across her lips. Fuck this shit. “Are you dating any of them?”If Danny was drinking something then, he would have spat it out.“No!” He flushed a deep red, making his mom cackle. “I was joking! Geez, Danny. But not even Matt? He's a football player. They're stereotypically hot right?”“He's dating Jason!” He pouted. “So you're in a group of gay guys and you're not dating any of them?” She snickered. “No,” he said firmly. “Then what about…” she tapped her chin with great emphasis like she was in some broadway show. “Roy?”Danny widened his eyes. What was with everyone and asking that nowadays? “N-No!” He could feel himself tense. “He's straight and all--”“So you would like him if he was gay?”“No? Yes? Who cares!” His mom bursted out into laughter. Danny’s cheeks were burning. “I do! I want to know who my future son-in-law is going to be,” she laughed excitedly. Danny rolled his eyes. “You're full of it mom,” she wrapped an arm around him and pulled him closely towards her. It felt nostalgic for him. Whenever he was upset, she would always reel him in close and make him feel loved again. He felt happy. A comfortable happy. The gladness you feel when everything feels...wonderful I guess. In a charming way. “So is that a yes…?” “I'm not saying anything mom.”
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
It was 4PM and Danny was beginning to regret his decision. Well, it was actually 4:15PM, since Matt was late, but still. In front of him was Kurtis’s car, with Jason still inside, and 20 cartons of eggs, all stacked up on top of each other by the leg space of the back seats. Matt widened his eyes.“What the fuck is this? Are we egging someone's house?” he raised an eyebrow and instantly looked over to Jason, who spread a guilty smile. “No…?” Jason hid away his mischievous grin with his hands.“It’s someone we all hate. It's fine,” Kurtis covered him with a light shrug. Matt knitted his brows together.“Oh really...?” an idea hit him. “You’re going to egg Brad’s house, aren’t you?”“Nah, never,” he shook his head overdramatically and crossed his arms. “You know that’s illegal, right?”“This isn’t the first illegal thing we’ve done, genius,” he rolled his eyes and opened the door to the driver’s seat. “Well are you coming or what?”Danny occupied the seat in the middle while Max and Jason sat on either sides of him. Jason was trying to contain his ever growing laughter and Max looked as if he wanted to neck himself. In the passenger seat was Matt, who was arguing with Kurtis (again) over how he ever came to the idea of egging his teammate’s house.“He’s a dick, he deserves it,”“Yeah, but we’ll get in trouble,”“Oh, so you care about getting in trouble now, huh?” Matt pinched his nose.“How do you think we’ll get away with this?”“We have masks and everything. Also, we’re going to hide our number plate so he can’t tell,” Kurtis’s smile grew excitedly.“Bitch, who else has a fucking BMW X1 in this whole fucking neighbourhood?!” Matt was basically shrieking. Probably meant that he was nervous.“It’s fine. Max proofread our plan anyway,”They all instantly snapped their heads over to Max. “I-I didn’t think I would be involved…?” he shrugged stiffly.“You have to be fucking kidding me. You got Max involved too?”“Hey, hey, he agreed to it. If you’re so against it, you can close your eyes or something. Be the getaway driver,” Kurtis tried to reason, his voice ending with a nervous chuckle. Matt wasn’t having it. He just crossed his arms over his chest and glanced out the window.“Fine, whatever,” Matt said coldly. Kurtis muttered a ‘thank god’ under his breath. “But know that I’m only doing this because I want Jason to be happy.”“Sure, I’ll take that,” he took it with a grain of salt and continued to drive down the long road. Danny knew this area well. Not only did he live around here (a few neighbourhoods across actually), but he came around here constantly as a kid. It equated to church (on Sundays) since Brad’s dad was a priest so it was super close by, and also painful get-togethers with his family. See, his mom would often get invited over. Danny doesn't remember much about his parents, since he would be brought over to another room to “hang out” with Brad--which was more like him screaming at him to get lost and enthusing over things he didn't care about until he made fun of him (then he would retaliate with insults)--but they would also hate to see him. Did they smell the gay from him all those years ago? He wondered that nowadays. “We’re here,” Kurtis slammed his foot on the break, propelling everyone forward. “Be careful! Jesus, these eggs are gonna crack,” Jason grumbled, undoing his seatbelt. “It'll be fine,” he hopped out and stretched out his skinny jeans. “Who wants to go first?”He stuck his hand through the rolled down window and grabbed a carton. Opening it up, his eyes glanced over the displayed eggs. There were a few cracked ones, but they were mostly fine. “No, I'm scared that they'll come out,” Matt protested, grabbing one of the masks from the boot. “What even are these?”“I don't know! I got them from Roy,” Kurtis gave a small look over to Danny, who blushed as a response. “He lent them to me.”“Does he know that we’re doing this?” He stretched the band over his head and let the thick plastic cover sit on his face. “Fuck me. I can barely breathe.”“Ok I will then,” Jason smirked, brushing over his arm to reach over and get one for himself. As Matt laughed and smacked his ass, Max groaned to himself. “No one knows we’re doing this. It's a secret,” Kurtis laughed maniacally like some stereotypical villain as he sticky taped paper onto the number plates, front and back. “What if Danny goes first?”“What?”Max spoke up and pointed directly over to the youngest boy. “Yeah, why not,” Kurtis opened the carton and showed him the insides like some dealer. “Pick your favourite and give it a toss.”It sort of felt like one of those throwing games at fairs. The ones that Roy would be the best at and Danny would fail at. Well, eventually he got the hang of it, after he joined baseball. The ones that gave the best prizes when you scored a lot, but the worst prizes when you scored mediocrely. Danny grabbed the one by the far right corner and gripped it tightly in his hand. The cold and smooth surface rolled nicely on his palm. “Don't aim it at a window. We don't want to smash it,” Max (or so he thought because he couldn't see his face through the mask) reached over him and shifted a mask over his face. He patted his shoulders encouragingly and pointed towards the centre of the house, which was a creamy beige with no windows. “See there? Maybe around there so we don't damage anything.”“Got it,” he stepped his right foot back and closed one eye to aim towards the blank canvas. He launched it forcefully yet precisely, the white splashing over the wall. The other three cheered. The yellow yolk oozed down, and it was like the splatter was marking a statement. His statement. “Oh fuck yeah!” Kurtis cheered, grabbing five in his hands to catapult it towards the house. He cackled as the shells toppled onto the garden in front of their “All American”, A-symmetrical, republican house. “Fuck you Brad! And your stupid ass!” Jason practically held a whole carton in his hands as he fired it almost-violently. He laughed wildly and grabbed a whole nother carton with his hands. He exchanged a look with Matt. The way he batted his eyes and pouted could make anyone fall for it. Especially Matt. Who has a soft spot for everything Jason did. It looked like an invite, a slight beg actually, for him to join in too. He gave in almost immediately. Of course. “Fine,” he grabbed a few in both hands and threw it towards the house. The cracking sound brought a grin to his face. “Fun, huh?” Jason edged closer, chortling as he wrapped his arms around Matt’s waist. “Argh find, I’ll admit that much,” he laughed into his chest as he grabbed another few into his hands. As he hurled the next few onto the beige base, the shells etched away to reveal a blue-purple colour. The football player glanced back into his hand, and back up to the now graffitied-on wall. “Wait what the--!?” Matt turned his head over from bruise-like stain to Kurtis. “Why the fuck is it coloured?”“Umm...Max…?” Kurtis looked over to the tallest boy who chuckled nervously. “You told me to put in some colouring agency so…” he trailed off and rubbed the back of his neck. "...I mean I only put it in a few of them..."“Kurtis?!” Matt shrieked, stomping over to him to probably choke him to death. Luckily Jason stood in the middle of them to press them apart. “What? I wanted to be creative okay!” He threw his arms up into the air. Danny eyed Max who couldn't seem to care less. He just continued to pound the eggs onto the house somewhat nonchalantly. It made him laugh. “Well fuck! We’re in great shit now and--”
CRACK
Everyone snapped their attention towards Max who stood there. Not moving. He looked gobsmacked. He dropped the nearly empty carton of eggs to the ground as his expression slowly shifted into a much more horrified face. “Umm…” he couldn't muster up any words. Everyone's eyes went towards the window on the far left hand side of the house. It was completely shattered. The glass looked as if it had been cut, clean off by the egg, with only small shards hanging loosely by the frame.
“What the fuck!?”
You didn't need to be a rocket scientist to figure out who that voice was. Everyone dashed into the car at an instant, frantically screaming and wavering their arms in the air from panic.Kurtis seemed to give a whole new meaning to “floor it”, because he just literally slammed his whole foot down onto the accelerator. Danny was so confused. He didn’t know whether to laugh, cry or scream. So he did all three of them at the same time, like some sort of weirdly disorganised, howling mess. But he wasn’t the only one, luckily. I guess. Not really, in the long run, since the panic-filled air felt hot and humid, and everyone was still losing their shits over what just happened.“What the fuck was that?!” Jason screamed, whipping off his mask. The only way to describe his emotion was “frustrated”. Confused and frustrated.“I missed okay!” Max was equally as loud as he gestured wildly. Guilt was rising up his throat, but it was overshadowed by his fears, which seemed like the big elephant in the room right now. Well, technically, car. “We’re going to be in a lot of shit now…” Matt muttered, looking as pale as Banquo’s ghost. Actually, you could say their ghosts, by the end of the week. If Brad’s dad got a simple glance of the car, they all knew that they were screwed. Danny was slowly counting down the possibilities of him slipping away. Blaming it on the others didn’t seem like a bad choice right about now.“Well, we’re all in this together now,” Kurtis took off his own mask and chucked it behind him.The way Kurtis said it made it seem like they were on the run. I mean, they were. In a way. It wasn’t exactly like an action-filled, crime thriller, but it sure felt like it when adrenaline kicked through Danny’s body. It felt right. Almost like a Tumblr aesthetic. Of 5 guys fighting through society, robbing banks, giving to the unprivileged. Like Robin Hood. Robin Hoods. Gay Robin Hoods. It made him feel like he was borderline cool, for once. I mean, it was all up in his mind, though. But he couldn't feel like he fitted in. Belonged. Somewhere. With this group of misfits.
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
“Marlboro or grass?” Jason had his body over the coffee table, his hands fiddling with unevenly ripped paper and a few small plastic bags. “Grass, duh,” Matt swung his arm around his shoulder and took the spot next to him on the couch. He gave a light peck on the cheek and glanced down at him tightly wrapping the paper. “Cigarettes for me,” Kurtis called, his eyes glued down to his screen. “Neither, obviously,” Max shrugged, receiving a ‘boo’ from the brunette. The taller teen rolled his eyes. “You know my morals.”“And you know that I hate boring people,” he pouted. Max just exhaled. “Come on! Just tonight?”The high adrenaline rush of the “egging incident” had been running low after a few hours. As they slammed the door shut of Jason’s house after the getaway, they seemed to all scream to get out all their stress and anxiety at once. It probably sounded like a murder or house raid from the outside. It sounded like a queer mixture of happiness and fear. Successful, but they might be in great shit. Oh well. Kurtis was the first to shrug it off and turn on the TV, while all the others eventually found a comfortable spot on the couch and seats around him. It felt comfortable. Like a casual comfortable. Like what a teenage movie was supposed to be like. Jason had those cool, pull-out couches that let all of them lie down lazily. Kurtis was in the middle with the remote control stuck to his hand, then Max was by his side, saying some sort of complaint about the movie they were all watching. He wasn't the biggest fan of ‘Legally Blonde’. Kurtis made up this bullshit conspiracy theory about how he hates blondes and how he was color blind so the colour pink had no effect on him. Then Max referred to some guy named “Brian” who used to go to school with them and how much he loved pink. Danny figured that it was some group member who moved away and lost contact with them. But they seemed to all be pretty invested in talking about him. Except Jason. Maybe this “Brian” didn’t rub him the right way. Danny was by the end, his legs spread by the edge of the sofa and his back pressed against the soft texture. This meant that he could easily ignore the other four on the topic of “Brian”, aka a complete stranger. There was a likely chance that he saw his face before, but he casted him as a ‘nobody' went on with life. But it did make him feel a tad left out. Only a tad. Since Jason wasn’t exactly enjoying the conversation either. He threw eye roll after eye roll into the discussion, looking as if he was trying to regain Matt’s attention. He really did look attention deprived. He was cuddled up to him ever so tightly, his hands smoothing out his shirt and his head snuggled up by his neck. It was sort of adorable. But by the time it was late afternoon, Jason’s attention span was wearing thin. Rightfully so. So instead, he tried to shift over the topic to getting piss drunk. Then Kurtis swooped in to rain on his parade, reminding him about their deal. After his infamous eye roll (once again) and a small pat of comfort from his boyfriend, they seemed to ease themselves into a new environment. Which consisted of drugs, alcohol and Max’s great disapprovement. “Peer pressure never works on me,” he snickered, snatching the phone from his grasp. “H-Hey!” he threw his arms up to try and whisk away the device. Max tapped onto an app, and at an instant, the room swelled up with music. “That’s better,” he grinned, tossing it back over to him. Kurtis caught it sloppily, making the faux-grey haired teen laugh. “Danny? You’re awfully quiet today.”The youngest teen snapped up from his daydreaming, his usual thoughts casting away at the call of his name. He saw Max raise an eyebrow with a subtle frown by his lips.He was such a motherly figure at times. It made him laugh. Danny had to be honest; it wasn't exactly much. Just the thought of Brad was still fresh in his mind. And he was left alone for a few moments now, with the four of them interacting and being distracted by something else. It wasn't anyone’s fault, but it left Danny to think for a bit. Staring into space with only his mind. “You okay?” he asked, making his way over to him. Danny replied with a purse of his lips and a small nod. Max could see through it. He wasn’t dumb.Quite the opposite, really. He was band captain and an avid oboe player. Poster child for a perfect son, really. Said no to drugs when offered (which was constantly). Always said yes to extra work. If it weren’t for the...obvious flaw with his sexuality, he was the personification of excellence. Well, the flaw isn't exactly a flaw (which Danny learnt a few days ago), but by society’s eyes it is. Or it seemed like it. Honestly a shame, really. His only real flaw being something so...unfair. “Uhh yeah…” Danny rubbed the back of his neck. “A tad tired,” he confessed. “All the adrenaline wore me out.”“Have you been sleeping properly lately? You looked really tired yesterday too,” he noted. Danny thought about it for a bit. He wasn't really dead anymore, though a little bit of tiresomeness lingered. “I mean...sort of?” He answered. Max seemed unhappy with the uncertain response. “No. No I haven't.”“And why's that?” he questioned, his tone lined with sincere concern, but with that tad hint of strict guidance. “You don’t want to tell me?” Danny paused. He shouldn't bring Brad up into conversation. Ever. Especially after today. “Well, they do say teenagers are more likely to use their phones at night. Blue light rays actually make it harder for you to fall asleep. I advise switching them off 30 minutes before you rest.”“T-Thanks…” Danny muttered. He felt bad for keeping the truth from him, especially because it was so simple. But he really didn't want to ruin the moment with a heavy topic. “Do you have a regular sleeping pattern? That really helps,” he encouraged. When Danny responded stiffly, he continued. “If you’re really having troubles, drink camomile tea. Probably better to avoid sleeping pills. You grow dependant on them after awhile,” the younger boy snickered, bowing his head to gesture a thank you. Max didn’t seem to take it, however. Unsatisfied with the answer, he continued with his essay-like speech that seemed to be better than any assignment Danny had ever done. “Do you have a sealed mattresses? Air-tight, plastic, dust-proof covers work the best against allergies. If you have them, of course.”“I actually have pretty bad allergies,” he said, his voice a tad lighter. Probably because he was subtly steering away the topic of the conversation. Into a very lighthearted one too. “What are you allergic to?” Max leaned over a table set up by him. Danny actually sort of forgot that Kurtis set up food. He was really out of it. Grabbing the bowl of chips he popped a few into his mouth and gestured for Danny to take some. He took a handful and answered.“I’m allergic to the weirdest fucking things,” he laughed, licking the salt around his lips. “Energy drinks, bell peppers, dark chocolate, lemongrass, meth--”“Damn that sucks,” Matt chuckled, reaching towards the table to fetch a few drinks and red cups. “Meth’s some good shit.”“Oh shut up Matt. We know you haven’t done anything more than caps,” Kurtis grabbed a can from his grasp and cracked it open. The football player crinkled his brows and shoved him lightly.“Oh fuck off,” he slurred, an odour of thick herb escaping his lips. He couldn’t fool anyone with that slouch. “We all know you can only take like 2 shots.”“But at least I can take solid dick you “top”,” he cackled, gulping down the drink. “Not like Jason has some big-ass dick though.”“Don’t drag me into this,” he rolled his eyes, wrapping his arms around Matt’s waist. “He does though,” Matt added, snuggling his nose against his neck. Jason replied with a loud guffaw and a cock of the shoulder to the amused Kurtis. “Don’t be so vulgar,” Max gnawed on his bottom lip and glanced away. Covering his flustered face with a cup of creaming soda, he received a crowd of laughter. “Trust Max to say that,” Kurtis jabbed, nonchalantly leaning over to him and messing up his hair. Max replied with a frustrated look, stroking his fingers through his silver locks to clean it up. “I have the right to,” he raised his chin, squinting his eyes over to him sharply. Kurtis seemed to take it sort of negatively. It sounded like Max was starting to get furious, and that he was fighting back. If Danny learnt something from hanging out with them, it was to never fight back to Kurtis. Because he’s one competitive bitch who doesn't like to lose. “I never said you didn’t,” he narrowed his eyes slightly, lowering his canned drink onto the table. This wasn’t good.“Well do you mind not making fun of me for my morals?” he was still retaliating. Danny swore that the couple took a step back to watch this unfold.“I do mind when they’re stupid and offensive to every single person in this room,” he crossed his arms. Max bit down on his bottom lip and glanced away. “Do you know how we feel about it?” he was either ignoring him or trying to brush it off. “Do you?”A dense silence filled the room for a moment. The uncomfortable feeling of uncertainty swelling up. Then it happened. There seemed to be no hesitation. Kurtis lunged towards him, crashing their lips together in a messy, uncoordinated fashion. He trapped his intoxicated, bitter breath within their lips. Jason and Matt instantly shrieked. From both surprise and excitement. Danny was too, though he was on the more excited half of the spectrum. ‘He did it. He actually fucking did it’ Danny thought, snickering slightly at Kurtis’s crinkled brows and obviously forceful nature. But he could only pipe out a small one since he was still taken back. He was surprised. Really surprised. Kurtis parted, taking a deep, long exhale. He looked calm and collected. A little cocky. Max, on the other hand, looked shocked. He jolted backwards, his body collapsing onto the wall. He took in a sharp inhale, his eyes still wide open and his jaw still dropped. There was a pause. A moment of silence. Again. Where the air filled up with anticipation. “Dude,” Jason was the first to speak up, but it was only a singular word. It was barely audible, as if it was muffled by complete and utter bewilderment. Danny felt a small laugh tickling by the back of his throat now that the tense and, overall stuffy atmosphere was slowly melting away. But then it hit him. Fuck. How had Danny been this stupid?
Max was homophobic.
“Too vulgar for you taste?” Kurtis looked over to Max confidently, but it drained away in a blink of an eye. Max was pale. Much too pale. He was frozen in place, his eyes still dilated. His blue lips were slightly parted, a ghostly breath wavering in and out. It looked like he witnessed his life flash before him. His hands were trembling in front of him, which seemed to taunt Danny. He wanted to grab onto them and hold them tightly. But he couldn’t. He just stood there and gulped. “Max I…I didn’t mean to be so…” Kurtis trailed off. He clasped their fingers together, but the taller boy whipped his hand towards his chest and dashed away. “Wait Max!”“I-I’ll go get him,” Danny mumbled chasing after him. He didn’t think twice about it. The words seemed to tumble out without a second thought. It was like his body had a mind of its own, leading him towards Max.His inner self wanted to make him feel better. Comfort him. Danny stared at the bathroom door which was slightly creaked open. Max had to be in there. He slammed it open, a loud bang echoing throughout the room as it crashed into the tiled walls. Max cowered away from the sound. He was in the corner, his knees close to his chest. He looked so...scared. Really frightened. Didn’t look anything like the Max that he expected when he heard about him through chains of gossip.He was quiet, sure. And maybe a little soft. Mostly on the nice side. But he was also hard working. Determined. Always had his head in the game. Mind over matter, at all times. If you asked anyone in school, ‘Who is the most likely person to be successful when they’re older?’, most people would say Max. Why? Because he’s the type of person to work hard to achieve his goals and dreams. He always seemed like he had his life together. He knew exactly where he was going. He seemed so sure of himself all the time. And everyone seemed sure of him too. All the time. So seeing him like this hurt Danny. A lot more than he thought it would.He leaned down towards him, one hand in front. He hesitated when Max shuffled away and jerked his arm. He placed the other hand on top of his knee as gently as possible and exchanged a look of concern. Max’s eyes were bright red. It looked like he was breaking apart. Danny had to look more comforting than that. So he masked it with another layer; a warming smile, which he seemed to stretch out abnormally. Probably too fake for Max to not catch onto it. “S-Sorry…”Were his first few words. Danny parted his lips.“For what?” the fabric of his black skinny jeans felt rough by his fingertips.“For running. For crying,” he sniffed. “For overreacting.”“Hey, no, it’s fine,” Danny smiled, adding another layer on top of his already crumbling expression. “There’s nothing wrong with what you did, okay?” Danny, for once, sounded like the mature one. Their roles were switched around. It seemed like he knew what he was doing, for once. And Max was actually lost, for once. “B-But…” Max’s voice was cracking, and it put a dent into Danny’s chest.“Can I confess something to you right now?” Danny crossed his legs, trying to make himself feel comfortable as well as Max. The older boy gulped and nodded. “I was homophobic. Really homophobic,” he widened his eyes. “Until...yesterday…? Something like that.”Max glanced down.“...really…?” he mumbled, though it was more like a faint whisper.“Yes, really,” he edged in closer. “And someone told me that you were too. And from your reaction…”“...it’s obvious. I know,” he gave a light sigh. His back hunched as he cradled his thumbs with his palms. “Its complicated to understand...I know. I went through it. I used to always wonder why the world was so against this. So against me. People like me. When I couldn't help it…” Max pressed his lips together, trying to shelter his eyes with his bangs. “But then I realised. The world isn't against me. I mean, some people may be against it, but they're not the people you should listen to. Why would you want to put up with people who don't respect you for the way you are?” The younger boy exhaled. “I know it's going to take you forever to wrap your head around...whatever. Whatever is going on but,” he weaved his fingers through his, gently pressing down on his knuckles. “Know that Jason cares about. Kurtis cares about you. Matt cares about you. And I really care about you, okay? People don't have the right to hate you because of this. It's something you can't help. And either way, it's not like it's a bad thing,” “B-But it is…” it was barely audible. It sounded like he was scared. “If there's no reason to hate on...you know…” he gulped. “...then why would people hate them--I-I mean us. Us.”They exchanged looks of concern and worry. Danny felt his own chest crack when he looked into his glassy, wide eyed gaze. “I…” he paused. “...I...I don't know.”“There's a reason behind everything I just…” he shook his head and glanced away. “I appreciate it Danny but…” he buried his cheek into his elbow. “I can't wrap my head around something with no explanation. That's not me.”“I…” he breathed out deeply. “I understand…” his hand lost touch with his. “Just know that, there's no use in trying to convince people to love you. Especially when there are people here, who already love you.”He caresses his knee one more time before exiting the bathroom, gently shutting the door behind him. He felt empty. Defeated. Like he went in, sure of himself that he could drag out a win, but then he came out with no bright flag under his belt. No treasure, no prize, no nothing. Just pity that he wanted to throw at him and endless amounts of self loathing.
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
When he entered the living room again, the three others were sitting around anxiously by the sofa. Kurtis held his clasped hands by his lips, trying to calm down his breathing. Matt had his eyes towards the ground, looking pale and stiff as a statue. Jason was by his side, rubbing his waist comfortingly and planting his cheek by his shoulder. “Hey…” Danny entered the room with weak and swaying steps. Kurtis looked up immediately, dashing over to him. He looked like he was drunk off of regret. Danny felt bad. “How is he? Is he okay? Do you think he wants to see me?” Danny didn't reply with anything definite. It sort of looked like an unknowing nod. “...I guess not. Fair enough. Tell him I said sorry. Because I really am.”“I know you are…” he muttered, though Kurtis probably didn't hear it properly. “Do you think I should talk to him?” Matt spoke up, wriggling out of Jason’s grasp. “I-I know him well so…”“Yeah,” Danny glanced away, running his fingers through his hair. “I think he needs to talk to someone who understands...how his head works, I guess.”He replied with an assuring nod as he rushed past him and towards the bathroom, which had a orange tinted light shining through the thin edges bordering the door frame. He first knocked and called out to Max with his name. When the door slowly creaked open, he seemed to lunge inside and shut the door behind him. Jason exhaled. “He's always so worried about him,” he pursed his lips. “I think Max should learn how to take care of himself.”“He does. He's just…” he thought for an appropriate word. “Lacking. In this area. You know his home life.”‘No, I don't know his home life’ was the first thing that popped into Danny’s mind, which he seemed to blurt out. He couldn't tell until he looked over to see Kurtis's surprised expression.“Umm...I don't know whether Max wants me to…”“Well he's in our group now. You might as well,” Jason took a seat by the sofa and grabbed a can of soda to drink. Kurtis eyed him sharply. “Can you stop being so moody? I swear to god, if this is because you're jealous--”“I'm not jealous! I'm just saying that Max needs to toughen up,” he rolled his eyes. “Jason. We both know that we’re really good friends. You know I love you but, you need to let it go. Matt doesn't like him like that,” Jason glanced away and covered his lips with the can. “Anyway, Max has strict parents. Really religious, strict parents. Ones that don't exactly appreciate...us. Our kind…?” He snickered. “That makes us sound like some sort of savage group. Like a virus or something. But they don't like anything unconventional, to say the least.”“They flipped when he dyed his hair grey,” Jason added, rolling his eyes. “Yeah, he couldn't hang out with us for months that year. But hey, he loves it. And he still dyes it the same shade to this day,” he gave a little chortle. “He just says to his parents that the dye was permanent and it won't come off because he's naturally a light blonde.”Danny laughed. So he could be a liar. But who wouldn't lie to their parents if they against anything I suppose. “Parents are always the biggest influencers on children,” Jason shrugged. “And if they're dicks, obviously he's going to be a--”“He's not a dick Jason,” he groaned, rolling his eyes. “I swear to god, I hate it when you're pissed off and I--”The door swung open to reveal Matt and Max slowly walking out. Max’s eyes were bloodshot, and his feet dragged behind him, but Danny was just glad that he was okay enough to come out. By his side was Matt, who gave him a comforting and encouraging smile as he sat by the couch. The atmosphere still sat eerily. Kurtis and Jason glanced towards each other, like they were trying to force the other to speak up. A song still played softly in the background as they all seemed to gulp nervously. “H-Hey guess what?” Matt was the one to speak up. He tossed a phone in his hands before he clicked it open and showed a message. “Someone special is dropping by for a few months.”Kurtis leaned his head over and widened his eyes. “Oh my god!” He brought his hands to his lips. “We were just talking about him!”“Yeah I know! That's the crazy thing,” Max joined. Danny gave a light smile to his returned state. Well, not physically. Maybe not mentally either. But he acted fine and everyone was just trying to brush it aside for now. So it seemed fine enough. Like Whitney Houston says, "It's not right. But it's okay."“Let me see,” Jason looked over onto the screen and his face churned into horror. But he was quick to plaster on a smile and choke out a laugh. “Oh! Nice...how long is he staying for?”Before he answered, it looked over to Danny, who seemed a little excluded from the circle. Feeling a tad bad, he shuffled over to him.“Just scroll,” he handed the Iphone over to him. Matt turned over the screen to face Danny as he lightly skimmed the grey box of the other person’s text. He scrolled somewhat high up.
BRIAN: Hey Matt! I'm coming over to visit for a few months. I'm staying at Brian M’s for a bit I think
And then his eyes continued down to Matt’s text.
MATT: oh shit dude! What about school and crap?
BRIAN: I'm transferring over to yours for a bit.
BRIAN: Something to do with this state exchange program thing
BRIAN: I don't know
BRIAN: I just sort of signed up for it
MATT: that's great!
MATT: we've missed you!
BRIAN: Jason hasn't
‘So he's aware…’ Danny thought. But then again, Jason likes to make it obvious when he doesn't like someone. He continued.
MATT: its fine
MATT: he just gets jealous easily
MATT: and obviously your personalities clash
No wonder Jason hates him. He hates anyone who messes with him or Matt. Especially anyone who messes with him and Matt, as well as their relationship.
BRIAN: exactly!
BRIAN: he’s not gonna like it
MATT: he’ll get over it
MATT: he always does
BRIAN: let's hope so
BRIAN: I'm gonna be there for a couple of months
Does this meant that he would sit with them? Did that mean that they would become a 6? Well fuck that. Now even Danny felt a little intimidated with this new 'Brian' guy coming into the mix. He seemed to jump into the boat of envy alongside Jason.
MATT: really?
BRIAN: yep! Get ready to see me next week, first period
BRIAN: ;)
When Danny glanced up from his phone, it looked as if they had some sort of conversation without him. Not like he needed to listen properly anyway, since it was around this “Brian” again. Who he didn’t even know existed until now. Kurtis seemed incredibly excited, with wild gestures and over the top expressions. Matt was giggling along, having some sort of add-ons to whatever he was saying. Max seemed pretty entertained, with a few anecdotes up his sleeve. But Jason? Well Jason just seemed bored. He had himself tucked underneath Matt’s embrace with his frown pressed up against his shirt.“Like that time we all did that group project together in year five?” Matt brought up, much to the distaste of Jason, who rolled his eyes yet again and cuddled up to him closer.“Oh! The one about paper planes?” Kurtis laughed. “That was one hell of a group though.”“Us four and the two Brians?” Max reminisced. “Yeah, I mean we lost but, it was pretty fun to work on.”“Until you two starting fighting,” the brunette pointed directly over to the couple.“Okay, Jason can come off as strong-headed at times. Well...all the time actually,” Max chuckled, the other boy cackling.“True!” he joined enthusiastically. Maybe because they were steering away from ‘Brian’. Whoever that was.“Aw, remember when you got mad at me because you thought I stole your pencil,” Matt recollected, jabbing slightly as his boyfriend.“Remember when we hated each other for a bit because I was bitter of how hot you were and you would get annoyed with my existence,” they both laughed. “I wasn’t annoyed with your existence! I just thought that you were really cocky. And you being a dick to Brian.F wasn’t exactly great,” Jason’s chest sunk at the name. “Especially because he was my best friend at the time.”“I didn’t like how he was the self assigned leader,” his tone was a tad stronger. There was only a thin layer of his playful nature hovering over the top, the rest sounded bitter.“Was Brian your boyfriend then?” Kurtis asked. Danny expected him to ask in a troublesome tone, but it came out like a nonchalant question. He just seemed a tad curious. Probably because he wasn’t trying to hurt his best friend intentionally, though he seemed to take a bit of offense to it. Kurtis was bad at reading the air sometimes.“No, that was Year 7,” Max chimed in. “And then Kurtis dated him in Year 8.”“Ha, does that mean you were sloppy second?” Matt said facetiously, pulling Jason closer to him to try and cheer up his boyfriend. Maybe he noticed that he didn’t like the topic too much, or maybe his slight frown was making himself feel upset.“No, it means that he found someone better,” he bantered back.“And so did I,” he pecked Jason lightly on the lips. The younger boy melted into the softness of it, smiling against him as he tightly held onto his shirt.“That’s sweet Matt,” he let out a flattered chuckle. He had a bright beam by his lips, that looked like he drew out a win. Another victory for Jason Dardo. I mean, he did always win when it came to Matt. At the end of the day. “What's the time?” Kurtis glanced towards his phone as he clicked it open. 10:00PM. Danny couldn't figure out whatever it felt later than that because of everything that happened. It felt dense. Or he was just tired. Because he always seemed tired nowadays. “I think we should head off to bed. Danny's known to have an irregular sleeping pattern,” Max smiled towards him as he rubbed the back of his neck. “W-We don't have to...its not even that late,” he chuckled off. “Eh, but I think we’re all pretty tired. I'm actually so exhausted,” Kurtis yawned. “Yeah, I’ll get a few blankets and pillows from upstairs. I guess we can all sleep on the couch if that’s fine,” Jason rubbed his eyes. “If not, Jason and I could get a room by ourselves and…” Matt wriggled his eyebrows and received a chuckle.“No. No. No fucking tonight,” Kurtis threw himself onto the couch and took his original position, looking like he was already waiting for Jason to fetch the blankets.“We won’t be loud though, promise,” he joked on, following his boyfriend upstairs.“We all know you can’t be quiet.”The two disappeared into the blackness of upstairs. The other three were left wondering if they would fuck really quickly before they would come back. They were hoping not. Thank god everyone else was tired too though. Didn't make him look too much like a pussy. Thank you Max (sarcasm). “Who do you think will fall asleep first?” Max positioned himself next to Kurtis, with Danny by his other side.“Probably me. I’m so fucking tired,” Danny spoke, his words slurred. Max chuckled.“You sort of look it,” Danny faced him, deadpanned. “No offence.”“None taken,”“You don’t think they would fuck right next to us, right?” Kurtis wriggled over to his side.“Hopefully not,” Max shook his head in disapproval. “No one wants to witness...them. You know…”“True,” the other two chorus.By the end of the night, they had all found comfortable positions by the large sofa. Though the couch was a little stiff so his back began to hurt over time, Danny found himself wiggling against the soft feel of the blankets as he pulled it over his chest. He propped the pillow up and pressed his cheek against it. He could see the couple on the far end spooning, and Kurtis already closing his eyes to find some mental stability with the couple by his side. “Okay, goodnight guys.”Max switched off the light and snuggled underneath the blankets to his spot. As the others sang a lazy goodnight of their own, Danny smiled to himself. They were the first lot of friends he had in...forever. They hung out. They did cool shit. They talked so casually. So comfortably. Fucking finally he found people that he could get along with. He could have fun with. And not that forced sort of fun. He loved it. He really did.He shut his eyes and felt his heart's flutter come to an easy pace. As he heard silence fall in the room, he parted his lips to let out a relaxed exhale. This is what felt like when everything seemed alright.
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
Danny had the urge to drink water during the night. It's not a regular habit, nor is it normal for him to wake up during his sleep, but his throat seemed to suddenly dry up that night. Maybe because he drank basically nothing that day. He felt parched, to a point where he could barely swallow. So he shuffled out the side of the blanket, trying to be as quiet as possible. It was slightly difficult though. Max was so close to him. He tried his best to slip past him without a single touch, though it seemed nearly impossible at the time. Their hands were incredibly close, only a fingernail away, and his long legs were coiling over the and under the blankets, making it that much harder for Danny to manuever himself out of the tangled mess. There was a large, empty spot between him and the couple. It was like the sofa was split into two, or there was an invisible wall separating them. Matt’s hands found a comfortable spot by Jason’s waist, pulling him in closely. Jason, in return, was holding onto his arms loosely, his lips parted as he softly snored. Danny rubbed his eyes and took light steps by the tips of his toes over to the dining room. As he yawned and made his way through the chairs and tables, he could make out a light by the kitchen. ‘It must be Kurtis…’ he thought, remembering the empty gap on the sofa. He pressed his palm against the wall and peered in. Kurtis had positioned himself by the barstool with his body over the the counter. He had a glass of some, probably alcoholic, beverage held between his middle finger and thumb. As he swirled the insides wearily, he hummed under his breath ever so quietly. Danny could just hear it, and he smiled to himself. “Nice singing,” Danny teased, smiling along with the bittersweet melody. Kurtis flicked over to him and they locked eyesight. A little more intense than what Danny expected. He gulped. He lowered the glass onto the table, filling the empty space with a small clank. His eyes were wide and red. There was a slight pause before he rubbed them with his sleeve and patted the barstool next to him. “Why are you up?” he asked, his voice forcefully perky. “It's late, you know?”Danny glanced over to the clock. 3:46AM. “It's early actually,” he grinned, covering the curiosity and worry with a grin.“Ha, very funny,” he ran his index finger around the thin rim of the glass. “But seriously. Why are you up?”“Just thirsty. You?” he broke their eye contact to stare at the countertop. Kurtis slipped himself out of his chair to grab another glass by the cupboard. “Couldn't sleep,” he confessed, turning the handle of the tap to let water ooze into the cup. “Max said to drink camomile tea if you can't sleep,” he teased, accepting the cup into his hands as Kurtis slid it over. “He also said that I made fun of his morals,” he gave a light snicker. “...do you think I did…?”“Umm…” he brought the glass to his lips. “Thought so…” he took a long sip of his drink. “I'm known to be extra.”“Not like that though,” Danny chortled as Kurtis stiffened slightly. “More in, like, a gay, ‘Vogue model’-esque sort of way. Does that even make sense?”Kurtis laughed, genuinely. It let Danny have a confident exhale. “Yeah, yeah it does,” he shoved his nearly empty glass over to the sink. “...you really think so?”“Yeah man,” Kurtis beamed. “Good. Because I don't think people get what I'm going for sometimes. Like today, I tried out this couture, sort of 70s inspired coat and a--”Kurtis continued with animated expressions and over the top gestures. Danny was happy. He could imagine him being a fashion icon. Or an executive designer. Or like a model. Did he just call him hot? Unintentionally I suppose.But Danny really could see it. Kurtis, surrounded by a sea of flashing cameras with a loud applause filling the night sky-like room. “I'm so glad someone understands it,” he smiled. “It's pretty obvious that you're gonna become something Kurtis,” the older brunette smiled to himself. “Really?” He pressed his lips together to try and hide his ever growing grin. “Yeah,” Danny replied with a confident nod. “I honestly feel like everyone in the group will go somewhere. You guys seem so...successful-looking? Is that even possible?”Kurtis laughed.“Yeah, well, Max will probably be the only one who’ll make it out of this shitty town,” he folded his arm over the counter. His smile had fainted slightly, with the ends up his lips just lifted. “He’s the only one who’s bothered to try sometimes. The one person who likes to pay attention and work hard. It’s something that literally no one else in this fucking town does,” he lowered his head to his arms. “It’s what makes him so great,” he peered up at Danny with glassy eyes. “If you ever get the chance...can you apologise to him for me? I feel like I’ll make it worse if I ever say it myself.”“I can’t,” he shook his head. “I feel like you should. He’ll listen. I know it.”“You think?” Danny hummed. “Then maybe I should. He deserves the truth, I guess. He deserves to know that I’m sorry,” he trapped a groan between his lips and sleeves. “But I can’t help myself...I feel a little pissed off, you know? I feel like the only thing that’s holding him back are his parents. And sort of him too, since he’s listening to them. There is nothing wrong with him! He’s fucking amazing and he deserves to be happy but…” he rolled his eyes. “...but he’s holding himself back. I think he’s scared.”“Scared of what?” Danny watched his gaze shift to the empty space in front. His pupils were dilated and his lips were slightly parted. He looked as if he was dozing off. Not because he was sleepy but because his mind began to drift. Drift off to countless possible futures. Of him. Max. “Scared of what’s to come. Scared of the future,” he paused to crinkle his brows. “And he shouldn’t be because he basically everything in the bag.”“But he can’t hide from his parents forever, huh?” Kurtis gave a small yet still melancholic nod. “I regret what I did,” he said it so simply. It sounded sort of like a confession, from how crisp and thin his words seemed to be. “But I hope he’s thinking about it now. I hope he thinks of the future, and all the possible kisses that life will give him,” he snickered. “And I also hope that he’ll realise how great he is one day. He’s hard on himself, you know? Even though he comes off so confident and all-knowing when you talk to him. Internally, I know he picks himself apart to bits.”“He’s all up in his head, I know. I’ve heard,” he takes another sip of his drink. “But he needs to take a look around.”“When you're all up in your head, you forget to take in everything else because all you can hear are your thoughts,” Danny mumbled along with the faint words that Kurtis told him that night.
“It’s not like you should trust everyone, but sometimes you need to take into account what other people say because they’re a bystander”
He smiled to himself as the words glided off his tongue.
“So they can see past all the shitty mist that builds up in your mind”
Kurtis widened his eyes.“I wouldn’t have said it any better,” he lowly chuckled.“You told me that. That night...after we ditched,” Kurtis rubbed his eyes.“Argh, I barely remember because I got so pissed,” he grumbled. “How do you remember?”“Because it stuck with me,” he sat back on the chair and crossed his legs. “Really?” he seemed a little surprised, but it looked like he was trying to keep his calm and cool state.“Yeah. It really did,” he folded his arms over his chest and let the cool wooden back temper with his heated body.“I used to be like that, you know? All up in my head,” he had a soft and soothing voice. “My parents used to be out a lot when I was a kid. It was pretty lonely, to be honest. I always felt like I was so alone. Like I had no one else but myself,” his eyes lowered.“And so I kept to myself a lot. Never talked too much. Kept everything internal. Happiness, hate, misery, shock, excitement. Because it felt like the right thing to do...to bottle everything up,” one hand uncrossed itself as he tapped along the countertop.“But then Jason came along one day. I don’t know how. I don’t know when. But he sort of just...sat next to me one day. With that dorky smile he puts on. What a fuck face,” Danny laughed at Kurtis’s small mumbles of insults.“And he was so out there. He was such an extrovert, and he loved to talk and loved to talk about everything he was into. Which was himself. Basically he talked about himself a lot,”“Yeah, sounds like him,” they both cackle.“But he said something that stuck to me. ‘Don’t over analyse. Don’t fucking keep everything to yourself. Because you’re better than that and the world needs to hear what you got. Who you are.’,” he closed his eyes.“And I’ve never looked back since.”
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
It was a fairly lazy morning for them. Max whipped up a nice breakfast for the whole group, because he, of course, woke up at 6 while the others were forced to wake up around 8:30. After Jason groaned and whined to let them eat on the couch with Matt begging Max as well (probably because he wanted to back up his boyfriend) , he gave in and let them lazily chomp on their plates of fried eggs, bacon and pancakes. It was while Danny was half watching an episode of ‘Sons of Anarchy’ at 10 and half looking at his phone when they began to make plans for the day. “I need to head off to work again,” Kurtis groaned, munching on his eggs.“Still need to pay off that huge fine?” Matt teased, making the other boy huff. “Yes,” he dragged out a lazy frown. “I mean, it wasn’t even that bad! I don’t get why I got charged like crazy.”“Probably because you were drunk, underage I might add. Also you crashed the car and you just missed a few pedestrians and you smashed into a tree,” Matt explained, all with an amused grin by his lips. “Then, the tree fell down, crashed down onto a building and cracked a few windows as well as damage the walls,” the others began to cackle uncontrollably as Kurtis flushed deeply. “Wow gee, I wonder why they charged you so badly.”“Fuck off Matt,” he covered his flustered face with his glass of orange juice. “I don’t see you having a job.”“Because I’m privileged,” he cocked a shoulder arrogantly and returned to his meal.“You mean spoilt?” Kurtis argued with a snarl.“No, he’s simply a brat,” Max chimed in with a snicker as he grabbed his own empty dish. He was too distracted by the soapy mess in the sink to realise Matt’s genuinely hurt expression. Danny knew it was a joke, obviously since Max couldn’t even hurt a fly, but Matt seemed to take it to heart. As he parted his lips to fire some angry comment, Jason hushed him with a small shake of the head and a peck by the cheek. Indicating for him to take a deep breath, Matt did as instructed and eased back onto the sofa.“Anyways, does anyone else have plans?” Kurtis shoved aside his plate and clasped his hands behind his head. “If everyone’s off doing something, maybe you and I should have a lazy day,” Jason poked his index finger onto the centre of Matt’s chest and giggled into his neck.“I wouldn’t mind that,” he said with a low laugh. “We could watch a few movies, cuddle up with a mug of hot chocolate. Maybe after we could--”“Okay, that’s enough,” Max butted in as he took a spot by Danny. Matt chuckled and rolled his eyes as he wrapped an arm around his boyfriend’s shoulder. “I’ll just head home I suppose. Practise my oboe.”“Are you gonna practise your feature piece?” Matt asked. Max brightened and gave a confident nod. “Nice.”“You ever gonna let us hear it?” Jason smiled as he played with the fabric of Matt’s shirt.“You guys don’t even like classical music,” he rolled his eyes with a grin still visible.“Okay true. But we support you nonetheless,” Kurtis encouraged on. They exchanged warming smiles as Danny cleared his throat.“I don’t have anything to do. Is it okay if I hang out with you Max?” he asked. The older boy seemed a little startled. Like it slightly tampered with his beat. “I mean you can if you want,” he shrugged. “There’s no guarantee that it’ll be fun though.”“I don’t care. I don't have anything better to do,” “Ok, sounds like a plan then,” Max smiled, gathering the last of his things to stuff them into his pockets. It was sort of a reluctant smile though. It was hard to explain. All Danny could do is express it the way saw it; and he honestly thought that Max was a tad nervous. “Oh shit…” Matt muttered to himself as they all began to slowly arise from their lazy spots on the couch. His wide eyes were glued onto the screen of his phone. “What is it?” Jason twirled his head around just as he grabbed his jacket. “Dan’s asking me to come hang out at the diner,” he explained in a low tone. The diner. It was that one ‘cool’ spot that Danny never went to because it was basically the area for the footballers. Which meant Brad. The dick. And not the good kind. It was the kind of place that they would call the “footballer’s turf” if they were in the 60s. Actually, it'll probably be the bikers turf. Danny could imagine Matt in a black leather jacket, a pair of tight fitted jeans and slicked back hair. Now that would be aesthetically pleasing and not just for Jason. “Uhh...just go then,” Kurtis seemed a little confused. “But he just asked me if my “other friends” are coming,” he stared at the screen blankly. “Oh great, you're not gonna drag us along to it, are you?” when Matt hesitated with an answer, Kurtis’s eyes narrowed. “The answer is no Matt. I don't want to voluntarily get ass raped by jocks.”“It's not rape if it's consensual,” Matt tried to play it off with a somewhat witty line and a typically suave expression. Kurtis rolled his eyes. “He's hot, I know. But it doesn't give him the right to completely screw me over socially,” he continued with a tense gaze towards the boy. The footballer took a few steps back and decided to take another route to approach the topic. “Fair enough. I'm just trying to negotiate something, okay? To be fair, you sort of screw yourself over socially by talking back to Brad,” Matt tried to sound calm as possible so he wouldn't burst the already riled up spirits of the other brunette. “What do I gain from this?” Kurtis raised an eyebrow, willing to wager a little for the agreement. “What about that new palette from Sephora?” Kurtis halted. “The one I was looking at the other day?”“All yours if you come,”They fought with looks of disbelief and confidence.“Fine. I'm in,” Kurtis gave in to the temptations, leaving the other three boys startled. There was a small silence between them that moment. A one where Kurtis gulped to rethink his decision and Matt swallowed as well, because he was scared that Kurtis would back out of their deal. And of course, the other three didn't want to actually go and face the music or whatever shit they had to do to overcome social distress. So they just froze and waited for them to do something. Nothing. And there was no use in trying to fight this argument. Max couldn't exactly win this fight, even if he wanted to, and there was no way Danny could pull out a victory with his spot in the hierarchy of this group. And Jason? Well he already threw away all his worries because he was silently rejoicing over Kurtis and Matt agreeing on something for once. “What if I drive today?” Jason insisted on changing the topic with a light hearted one. Kurtis brightened. “I wouldn't mind that,” he had a smug smile. Danny sighed to himself at the new genre of topic. “I'm like the most sober one anyway. No hangover. No nothing,” he caught the keys that Kurtis threw at him swiftly, and beamed over to Matt. It sort of looked like he was waiting for some compliment from him, and he luckily gave him a round of applause. “Anyone's better than Kurtis, let's be honest,” Danny decided to jab in a small joke of his own. The older brunette gasped over dramatically and brought a hand to his chest while the couple bursted out into laughter. Max snorted and muttered a little compliment over to him. He felt accomplished. “H-Hey! I'm not even that bad!” He tried to reason. “You crashed the car, you constantly speed, you run past red lights, you--” Matt began to list multiple experiences with Kurtis. Honestly, he could probably go on forever. “Ok! Got it Matt. Thanks,” he rolled his eyes. “You're not that bad Kurtis. Just restless, that's all,” Max reassured him with a bright smile. Typical Max. Making everyone feel better. “Aw, thanks Max,” he smiled brightly. “Someone has my back.”He narrowed his eyes towards everyone else before he strolled over to the tall boy's side. Danny was glad that they seemed to patch things up. Without talking, somehow. It was something that Danny realised after a while. They never...talk. Properly. To each other about anything remotely serious. Except to Danny, which was really odd. Even though they seem to find themselves in the most emotional, angsty, teenage drama-esque, scenes, they just...walk off. Act all casual about it, even with that thin layer of uncomfort and distress floating by the top. They never talked about it. Properly. Was never open about it. It wasn't like what he would have imagined because they all seem so honest. It probably explains why no one seemed to go after Max straight away and make sure he was okay. Because they're not used to confrontation as a four. And why Kurtis and Max were okay again. And how Kurtis and Matt were okay again from a couple of minutes ago. It left Danny with the most unsatisfied feeling. But he didn't want to do anything about it either. Without feeling even more uncomfortable anyway.It wasn't anything for Danny to get his nose into, since he's glad that Max and Kurtis are on talking and joking terms again (even after a hastily and overall messy kiss), but he couldn't help but to feel a little uneasy about it. Especially because it was the biggest thing that's happened since he's joined. “I call shot gun,” Matt called, dashing over to the passenger seat. “Danny, what if you go in the middle?” Max opened the door for him and gestured for him to get in. “Shouldn't the shortest go on the middle?” Kurtis asked, locking the door behind them as he put on his other shoe in a hurry. “Wow Kurtis, you’re really loving Max. Aren't you?” Danny teased taking a step over so Kurtis could fit into the car. Max stiffened and and quickly rushed in to cover his flushing face, and Kurtis seemed to mutter some ancient satanic curse under his breath. “Maybe Jason will also be a shit driver,” Kurtis closed the door beside him. “As long as Matt doesn't give him a blowjob or something on the way, I think we’re fine,” Danny laughed. “Won't. Promise,” he did a small salute. “You've been so witty today Danny,” Max commented with an amused grin. “More confident nowadays, I guess,” he shrugged. “So you're comfortable with the group now?” Kurtis asked. “Yeah. A lot more,” they all exchanged thankful smiles throughout the car. “That's good. You're a really cool guy Danny,” Matt commented, having the widest smile that Danny could see by the mirror. He was happy. Happy that there was mutual respect. Happy that he had found new friends. And happy that he could consider them best friends. It was something that…he wasn't exactly used to. Though Jay and Gia were around, they would always be each other’s number one. And Courtney and Roy? He could never really figure that one out. The car ride was filled with shitty music being blasted at full volume. But it was good, shitty music. The radio station they stumbled onto was playing nonstop, nostalgic music. But not that really old nostalgic music that they couldn't relate to. That 'just right' sort of nostalgic music they could just remember from their childhood.Danny laughed at Kurtis's overdramatic singing. He was pretty sure that he was singing properly, and it's not like he was bad. Just very loud. And it really sounded like he was being cocky with it. Fair enough. He was good. The only person who seemed to mind slightly was Matt, of course. But he seemed to stand back a little for this one. Probably because it wasn't his area of expertise. So instead, it looked like Max took his competitive spot next to Kurtis and sing a little loudly too. They were all a little taken back at how decent he was. Though it was more a theatrical style of tone, Danny smiled to himself. Also, Kurtis's shocked expression was pretty funny.
He was pretty sure that he never adored "Semi Charmed Life" by the Third Eye Blind before this experience, but now, he could only imagine their laughing faces and cracked high notes when he heard it. And it brought a smile to his lips.
“We’re here,” Jason eased towards the driveway. Max quickly hopped out and gathered his belongings. He gestured for Danny to stand by his side, and he did as told. “I hope you guys have a good day.”“Yeah, see ya,”“Bye!”As they all waved goodbye and the two standing boys laughed at Kurtis’s over dramatic groan towards working, Danny was introduced to the inside of his house. Just by looking at it from the front, he could tell that it was a typical family. White painted walls, A-symmetrical architecture and a simple line of windows with curtains visible from the outside. There seemed to be no pop of colour, and no livelihood to it. It was somehow a little less eye-catching than all the other houses.As Max unlocked the house to let him in, Danny was instantly caught in awe of the design. Darkly coloured wallpaper spread across the entirety of the house, with paintings, all lined with golden frames, hung above places like the fireplace, sofa and dining table. They seemed to all fit a strict and formal colour scheme, with everything being from the limited colour palette of “monochrome”. Only a few sprinkles of gold were scattered across the room. But it seemed enchanting nonetheless. It looked like it could be one of the houses they use in movies to serve as the “rich and powerful family’s house”. Usually to set the mood for a murder/crime TV show, or for some popular drama airing at 6PM. He had mixed feelings over the house. He thought it looked fairly cool, but could he live in it? No. Not at all. It would make him feel so gloomy.“I'll be taking you to my favourite room in the house Danny,” Max explained with a wide grin. They ascended the staircase and turned a sharp right. By the end of the hallway on the left hand side, right next to a large painting of Jesus decorated with another one of those golden frames, was a similar looking door to the rest. But from Max’s facial expression, Danny knew it was something special. Turning the knob, he enthusiastically pushed the boy in. Inside was a room heavily decorated with antique goods. Even the rug was stitched ever so carefully and tightly as it sprayed its dark stay of colours across the wooden ground. Bookshelves were lined against the pure white walls, right next to another opening leading to another room. Two love seats faced the centre of the room, which was taken up by a large, grand piano. Just next to an oboe standing proudly by a stand. “Now that's my bedroom in the far corner over there,” he pointed towards the large, white gate-like doors by the full bookshelves. “Make yourself at home. I'll brew some tea if you want.”“O-Oh no I'm okay. Do whatever you were planning to do without me,” Danny smiled as he took a seat by the loveseat. It felt creamy and soft by his back as he eased himself towards the cushions. “Well,” Max grabbed the oboe by the neck gently. With his other hand, he pinched a cloth laying by the piano and began to polish the keys. “I'm just planning to practise my oboe a bit. Maybe catch up with studies later,” he explained with a grin. “See, I'm playing at the auditorium of music soon and I really need to practise hard for my solo piece.”“Oh! That's exciting. What's it called?” Max beamed at his comment. “Well, why don't you guess?” He propped the reed between his lips. A bright and full sound swelled through the room. The melody was smooth and serene, the clear accent flowing at a gentle yet expressive pace. He swayed the instrument beautifully, his expression melting into tranquility as the acerbic but still lustrous tune piped out of his instrument. It sounded a tad bittersweet, the higher notes softening a little around the edges. Or more...sad. Glum. Just a little. Like there was that tiny hint of it at the end of every musical phrase. But it was played so fluidly that Danny swore he could feel his own back easing up towards the chair. His own chest warmed at the humbling tune. Max took a took a sharp inhale then a soothing exhale as he parted the mouthpiece from his lips. He gave a well deserved and tiresome bow, as Danny stood up from his seat and gave a loud round of applause. “That was great Max!” He had a wide smile on his face. He felt a calming happiness flood through his veins. The one that made him feel so relaxed and refreshed, but with that high of being so glad as well. “Thanks Danny,” he lowered the instrument onto the stand and took a seat by the sofa-like loveseat placed right next to Danny’s. “So, do you know what it's called?”“Umm…” Danny pondered a little. It sounded strangely familiar. Like he heard it as a kid once or twice but he couldn't quite pinpoint a name. “I don't really know.”Max piped out a chuckle. That chuckle he gives where he sounds like he's more mature and all-knowing to Danny. Which is fair enough. Because he is.“It's called “Danny Boy”,” he explained with a smile. Danny felt like he was in some library listening to an adult read a book to him at the age of 6. “See, I got the opportunity to pick any song I wanted for my solo piece. It was around the time you sat with the group. I didn't think too much of your existence at first. No offence,”“None taken,” Danny felt his lips curl up as he explained actively. “But then I got to know you. And you drew me in,” he clicked his fingers. “Just like that. It was odd, at first. I think it's the childlike charm you have. Its a little hard to explain due to how strange it is. But I just thought you were unbelievably adorable and when this song came up, I knew I just had to--”He stopped. Danny felt his heart flutter slightly at Max’s sudden gush of affection. He gulped and bit down on his lips, trying to force all his embarrassment and slight flattery as well as bashfulness onto his plump bottom lip. He could feel it swell slightly from his anticipation of Max’s next move. The blushing sensation burned his cheeks as he watched the older boy twitch slightly in his seat and pace back and forth between excuses. “I-I...did that come across a little…?” Even Max couldn't think of a way to scrape through this smoothly. “No! I-I'm really thankful,” they came to the mutual agreement of the last word. Whatever it was supposed to be. “I'm thankful that you guys don't hate me…”“Oh Danny,” he pursed his lips. “Of course we don't. How could we?”“I don't know,” he rubbed his hand over the denim fabric of his jacket. “What group of seniors wants a junior hanging out with them?”“Me. Us,” he had the most warming smile. It made him feel...comfortable. He could make anyone feel comfortable. Because he was Max. And he was a sweetheart. “You're odd. Really odd. In the best way possible.”“I'll take it. Whatever it means,” he chuckled. “I'm not an avid fan of ‘following your gut’, like Matt or Kurtis. I’d rather calculate everything and go through things in a logical sense but...you make me do something different. I'm trying to calculate as to why,” he sprayed his fingers across his cheek as he leant his elbow against the arm of his chair. “I had a gut feeling that you were just...approachable. Nice. Sort of cool,” Danny snickered. “Or however millennials say it. And it lead me to choosing this song. It reminded me of you. Not just because of the name but also the way it made me feel,” he had an oddly whimsical expression on his face. Like he was intrigued within the thoughts of his own mind. And Danny found that interesting himself. He wondered along with him. ‘Bittersweet…’ he mumbled under his breath. Quiet enough to only come out as a small exhale. Maybe Danny was looking into it too much, but he felt as if he knew Max that much more. What was it supposed to mean though?“The way it made him feel”? How did Danny make him feel? “And I thought the arrangement was so intriguing. You see, American bands tend to be very rash. Loud, intense and fast pace. But the arrangement is very ‘European’,” he was really in his element as he spoke. “Smooth, rich and warm-sounding, you know? A great example of a European band arrangement is “1st Suite in E-Flat” by Gustav Holst. Now that's one absolutely gorgeous piece,” truth be told, Danny was incredibly lost. He was more into bands like Nirvana and Pink Floyd. Max seemed to have a taste that was the polar opposite of his. Which wasn't bad, of course. It just left him in a pit of complete confusement. “And I wanted to resemble something like that, I suppose. I mean, we do play this piece as a chorale from time to time but--” he paused and looked over to Danny. “You’re confused, aren’t you?” He gave a minimal and reluctant nod as a reply. “I'm not that musically talented. Well, I'm into music but...not like this, I guess,” he tried not to sink the mood. Thankfully, he didn’t. From the looks of Max’s expression. It was strangely, the opposite. “Oh really? I’d figure you're more into...rock. Correct?” Danny beamed at his perfect guess. But did he expect any less from someone like Max?“Yeah! My dream was to always produce cool shit and travel around. See new things. Meet fans," he sighed glee at his potential future. "That an adorable dream Danny," but with that comment, it made him feel stupid. Max didn't do it on purpose, but it felt like he was being treated paternalistically. Like he was a little kid in preschool who had wild dreams, but reality hadn't hit him yet so he didn't know that life was hard. And not all your dreams come true. "...but it's nearly impossible," he admitted."Well, they always say to follow your dreams," he pushed him on. When Danny didn't reply right away, he continued. "But, you do always need something to fall back on.""That's the problem...""Then study. Education is always key when it comes to plan Bs," Danny groaned. "Do you think it's too late? I'm not exactly doing the best right now," he frowned."No, it's never too late," Max encouraged him further. He sounded like a guidance councillor or a proud dad that always wanted his son to reach his full potential. It made Danny feel better. "Have you ever talked to Kurtis on your own?""Yeah, a few times," he was trying to link the two topics together in his mind. "Has he ever told you about his odd philosophy on life?" Danny raised an eyebrow at Max's question."I...I don't know...?" they had talked about deep shit before. Numerous times. But he couldn't really pinpoint one in his head that Max was talking about."About how life now doesn't matter in the future. Because it's high school and what not," he grumbled as he imagined his smug expression."Yeah, I think so," he pictured actual confrontation between the two and felt a bit confused. "Did he tell you too?""He told me one time when he was drunk and I had to walk him home," he complained. "It's sort of dumb. But it seems like Matt's walking in the same path.""What do you mean?" "See, they both seem to be in denial about...everything. In a way,"'So are you...' Danny smacked his lips together to not form any words. "But you need to resolve things, at the end of the day. Because life goes on. And you can't sweep absolutely everything under the rug," he pinched his nose. "And I just don't think they know that."Before Danny could reply, his phone dinged and it cut off the conversation immediately. Max glanced down at his notification and widened his eyes."Oh! I need to go study," he stood up and opened the door. "You set notifications for when you study?" Danny was gobsmacked."I like to have a schedule and keep everything organised," he smiled. "You're welcome to look around this room and my room. I'll be in the room across the hallway. Please don't go looking into the other ones, just in case it's my parents' rooms. Bye."And with that, he shut the door behind him, leaving Danny in a completely silent room. He had a few hours to crush, so pushed himself off the love seat and began to look around.
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
The keys felt cold on Danny’s fingers. As he pressed down on middle C, he let the note echo slightly before compressing it with the una corda, as fancy people call it, or soft pedal, as average people call it. He chuckled as he lined his fingertips against the white keys. The G note made him feel nostalgic. He let his faint memories lead him on. He slowly guided towards the F#, then to B, and E, D, G. He laughed. All he could manage to play on the piano was ‘Welcome to the Black Parade’, and only the first line. His emo-ness was really showing. As he parted the large instrument, his eyes glanced over to his room. The gate-like opening seemed so oddly intriguing. Well, Max did say that Danny could enter. And he did really want to know what the inside of a successful kid’s room looked like. So he opened up the white doors and peeked inside.It was very clean. His open cupboards had neatly folded clothes piled up on top of each other, all lined in a perfect row. Most of them were pastel coloured, button up shirts, if not, long sleeved, dark sweaters. Hung on top of them, were countless jackets, all coloured black or a deep grey. Even his socks were carefully wrapped around each other, so they could never be separated or lost. His bed had its sheets nicely tucked in, the simple colour of navy spraying across the whole of the mattress. It was placed right by the wall, where numerous awards and trophies sat proudly by a stand. A stand so long that it covered the whole wall, just so it could fit all his achievements. Next to it was a desk with a simple lamp, stacked up books and a wooden chair. Note to self, keep everything organised and clean to become successful.Danny glanced over the work on his desk. Upcoming assignments were pinned up against the back with highlighted key points and bold dates. Definitely organised. On the near empty space in the middle of the desk, was a single pamphlet. “People Can Change”. It sounded odd. It had orange linings on the top and bottom and bold, black letters.
‘Men who have resolved, diminished or made peace with their unwanted same-sex attractions supporting others who seek similar change’
He widened his eyes. Flicking it open, he scanned through the thin lettered yet thick passages. Numerous accounts of stories about homosexuality and “successful” results flooded the pages. It looked revolting. Accompanied by pictures of the camp facility and a large group of men circled around a rug of Jesus, it was all too nauseating and disgusting for Danny to hold onto. It slipped through his shaking hands. Gasping, he took a few steps back and tried to regain his calm state. His heartbeat was booming through his eardrums. He could feel his chest on the verge of bursting. So he clutched onto the fabric of his sleeve and tried to calm down his breathing. Bit by bit.He didn’t know where he got it. And he didn’t care. All he cared about was the fact that he was reading it. Considering it. And it couldn't have been by his parents, since he wasn’t out. So he must have took it himself. Kurtis was right. Too right.Did they know about this? Did any of them know that it came this far? Danny quickly shoved it in his pocket and tried to not think about it. It felt messy and overly crinkled between his jacket and crammed in hand. Well, if he could, he would rip it up into shreds. Burn it. Find whoever made it and punch them in the face. But of course he just gulped it down.
Hopefully the others knew what to do.
The real trouble now was getting past Max smoothly, and managing to muster up words to tell the others. They both seemed like difficult tasks to him. He could feel sweat drip down his forehead. His heart was beating at a million km per hour. Please don't panic. He couldn't panic. Begging for himself to calm down, he found his feet shuffling beneath him.He rushed out, the room feeling all the more stuffy the longer he stood there. He brushed past the piano, the door and halted at the knob of his study. All Danny needed to do was breathe. In and out. Slowly. To regain his posture and his state of mind. And so he did. In and out. Just enough for him to inflame the courage to turn and thrust forward. “Oh Danny,” he swung his chair around and Danny was met with a warming smile. He tried to brush away the lingering thoughts of pity for the boy. He knew what was inside all that. He knew the pain that pooled at his chest. And he couldn’t do anything about it. “Hey Max,” he smiled fakely, the force tugging at his cheeks uncomfortably. “Sorry, I just got pretty bored in there. Hope I’m not distracting you.”“Oh no, it’s okay. I was just finishing off,” he logged off of the computer and pushed away from the desk. “It might sound dumb, but I love doing work in here! It’s my father’s office, and I’m never allowed in here unless he’s away. Since I don’t have a computer, accessing my google docs for my assignments can be hard, you see.”“Mhm…” he tried to go along with whatever odd struggles he was facing. Danny never really understood it properly. Not only did he have his own computer, but talking about assignments and work seemed so foreign to him. He liked to push them back as far as possible in his mind and clear the space for shit he actually cared about.“Matt offered a computer to me. Ha, he’s the funniest guy I know. Unintentionally too,” he chuckled to himself. “He already gave me his old phone. I’m pretty sure he just doesn't understand the concept of money,” he shook his head. “Such a privileged kid.”“You mean a brat?” Danny added with a grin. Max snickered.“Of course. He always has been.”With a swift sway to the topic of Matt, before the younger boy knew it, they were in his living room table, chatting over earl grey (luckily milky, sweet because Max probably figured out that Danny is inexperienced when it came to the flavour of tea) and laughing about Max’s numerous anecdotes about the football player. He was quick to note that he loved him dearly and he was a great friend to him. He just could be a little...stubborn at times. And a little foolish. And also a little stupid. Danny laughed. “He’s a sweet kid at heart,” he brought the cup to his lips and gave a mature-looking nod. “But he doesn't know when to stop at times. He digs himself too deep a hole to get out of.”“I get it,” Danny took small sips at the still boiling beverage. “I can do that sometimes. When I stop paying attention to reality, that is.”“You have rash tendencies too?” he seemed intrigued.“Sometimes. Depends on the situation. When I get angry...I can go off. I have the tendency to go off, actually,” he exhaled. “I’m learning how to not take things so seriously.”“I understand completely. Though emotions haven’t exactly been the biggest downfall when it came to me, I’ve seen Kurtis and Jason completely break down sometimes. Well, Kurtis mainly,” Danny tried to hide his surprise. Not for Kurtis being a moody bitch (of course), but for Max to pick it up so easily. And discuss it easily too. He wondered whether it was addressed as a four or he stumbled onto it while they were alone. “With Jason...well...he has aggressive tendencies when it comes to some people.”“Why’s that?”“I don’t really know. I just thought that he wasn’t used to interactions. He likes to keep to himself. It was him and Kurtis for so long so…” he shrugged. “Probably became a habit.”“Do you think it’ll be dangerous one day. I mean, the whole Brad thing a few months ago in the halls…” Max glanced down at the hellish memory. “I don’t want to say he started it, but he did--”“Start it. Yes, he definitely did,” he lowered the cup onto table. “Jason has a tendency to be a bit…” he cleared his throat. “Bitchy.”Danny scoffed and nearly spat out his drink.“Y-You could say that again,” he tried to wipe off his ever-growing grin, thinking that it was too much. But Max just chuckled at it and he thankfully found it amusing. “You’re a nice guy Danny. Really nice,” he simpered into his palm. “Can I tell you something that I haven’t told the others?”Danny gulped. Instantly, he thought of the worst possible thing. Which is, the thing that was crumpling up in his pocket as they spoke. “I’m actually a brunette,”He sunk back onto the chair in relief. Danny felt as if he could relax a little because it wasn’t a sudden confrontation of something serious.“Really?” he played on with a surprised act. “Yeah. Well, I used to be blonde as a kid. When I first dyed my hair grey,” he messed with the ends of his locks. “But it eventually went brown. No issue though. Just a little harder now that I have to bleach it.”“You haven’t even told Matt?” Danny was amused at the lighthearted topic.“Nope. He’d probably accidentally spill it to my parents. He’s a horrible liar,” he rolled his eyes. “And plus my parents adore him, so he'll see them often,” he rambled. “Fair enough. He's a football player, his family is successful--not to mention Christian too. Plus, his ridiculously good looks can fool anyone, even parents.”“And Jason,” he added with a snicker. “I like to believe that he genuinely likes him. You never know though,” Danny was somewhat stunned by Max’s calm response. He knew he was homophobic, so he just assumed that he would be against it. I mean, he did find a few things a little repulsive when they flirted. But Danny could smile to himself happily, knowing that Max was fine with it. “They get along well. Don't they?” He grinned. “Yeah, they didn't use to though. Believe it or not, Matt didn't always adore every inch of his body,” he was reminiscing, but Danny couldn’t figure out whether it was in a positive light. “Quite the opposite, actually. I thought they were too similar at one point to get along. But still, Jason was too cocky and uptight for Matt to handle, and Matt was too privileged and pissed off for Jason to deal with. But then…” he narrowed his eyes slightly. “It seemed to click for them one day. I don’t know what it was but...it worked. Jason seemed to have a soft side that Matt unveiled and the rest was history.”“So were they drawn to each other quickly after that?” “Yeah...too quickly if you ask me,” he shook his head like a disapproving parent. “They sort of hit it off like boyfriends from the moment they became friends. It made the dynamic a little...weird for the group. At first anyway. Everything turned into friendly banter after that and...” he sighed. “...we’re now here. I guess. I’m fine with it. Sort of. I just needed time to get used to it but...” he pressed his lips together and amended the thoughts buzzing through his mind. “...I sometimes wonder if I’m a bad friend. Because I’m never supportive of Matt and Jason as much as he would like me to be.”He takes a long sip of the earl grey. Presumably, it was long enough for the steam to numb his thoughts a little, because he seemed to pop his head up after that and give a light smile. Fake. But a forced fake. The one that etched Danny’s heart with guilt. “But you want the best for Matt. And I think that’s what makes a great friend,” he tried to reassure with the cheesiest, most cliche words. But Danny meant it. That’s the thing. So even though he said some line that had been spoken numerous times in film, Max still took it in with a smile. Because Danny was sure that max knew what he meant. “Thanks Danny. I think I needed to hear that,” before he could ease himself back onto his chair, both their phones buzzed in their jackets. Danny dug through the crinkled mess of a brochure in his pocket to reach his device.
MATT: we’re outside
With a simple nod of acknowledgement, Max stood up to put away the tea set while Danny zipped up his jacket. He roamed around the room one last time. He wondered if Max sat out here often, or if he was secluded in own room instead. There wasn’t exactly anything out here that was useful, I suppose. And his parents would be out here too. And from the sound of it, Danny wouldn't exactly want to put up with them. Nor anyone else who knew them as acquaintances.Danny pondered as to if Max liked his parents. Even though, from the sound of it, they were anti everything. Everything to do with all his friends too. Even Matt. He chuckled. If only they knew the truth about the poster child for the perfect, republican son. “You ready to head out Danny?” he pulled down the long sleeves of his jacket.“Yeah.”He shook his head and took his side so they could escape the house that seemed to be both heaven and hell at once. It was odd. But he liked it. In the weirdest way possible. Sort of like how he felt about Max, at the end of the day.
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
Danny sighed to himself as they entered the diner. Monochrome checkered floorings led them over to a table by the far corner. Also the fact that they were one of the last groups to walk in (mostly because Kurtis tried to force them not to come and it took a solid 30 minutes of Max debating him to convince him that everything was going to be alright), made it all the more awkward since everyone looked around. And it was basically everyone they didn’t want to see from school. Except Brad. Luckily.“Do you guys want anything to drink?” a waitress came over with a large smile by her lips. “We’ll all have a coke, thanks,” Max ordered for them, having a pleasant grin of his own. He probably felt like a dad taking his four whiny kids to a nice diner after some football game or something. “Sure thing,” as she walked away, Kurtis slumped himself over the table. “Everyone we don’t like is here,” he fiddled with the centerpiece of their table. It was a small treble clef statue made out of plastic. Danny weirdly liked it though. He thought it was cute and it fit with the overall theme of the place.“Kurtis, shut the fuck up,” Matt groaned, skimming through the menu.“You’d be doing the same thing if you didn’t like the people here,” he replied coldly. “It’s a tad hypocritical, but why don’t we all try to calm down a bit,” Max tapped in, scooping two fingers underneath Kurtis’s chin to lift him up from the table. “And please sit up Kurtis,” he grumbled and pressed his back against the seat. “That’s better.”“Haven’t you been here before?” Jason asked, looking over his shoulder and at the menu.“I’ve been invited quite a few times. I’ve maybe come twice. I never ordered anything though,” he shrugged. “I don't exactly adore the time I spend with my other teammates.”“Well maybe they do. Because Dan’s coming over right now,” Kurtis’s voice hitched slightly from panic. He quickly grabbed a menu and turned his gaze over to the small letters. Danny gulped and hid his eyes also.He seemed to swirl around the waitress who put down their drinks like some cocky asshole in a musical. Which wasn't really far off actually. He stomped his foot down onto the ground and stood his somewhat prideful stance. Danny felt like he was looked down upon by him. “Hey Matt,” he rested his hands onto the table and looked towards the football player with an enthusiastic grin. “And friends.”They all swung an uninterested wave.“You did really well in your game the other week,” he commented. The wide grin made Danny uncomfortable. Though he was good looking. It was a confusing feeling because it was so fake. “We were just talking about it.”He glanced over to the rest of the footballers who were all staring over. They all knew where this was going.“T-Thanks,” Matt tried to remain calm and collected as he stretched out a smile himself.“Do you wanna come over? Because we have a spare seat by—““No, I’m okay,” he sounded nice yet firm. Dan’s eyes seemed to dull a little by the defeat.“You sure?” he questioned further, edging a little closer. “Yeah, I’m sure,” he said nonchalantly, making the whole vibe a lot more casual.“We did invite you over for a reason,” he tried to sound calm, but it was easy to pick up on the tensing of words. “I-I'll come over in a bit. After I eat,” he tried to smile. “…if you say so,” Dan left them with a small shrug and a shove to his pockets as he walked away, unsatisfied. It was only a minor defeat in his terms though.“I hate it when he does that,” he grumbled, looking back at the menu.“What? Harass you to make you look socially acceptable? Yeah me too,” Jason chuckled through it. Matt exhaled.Danny knew that Dan was a good guy at heart. A little misunderstood for the footballers in earlier years, which probably resulted in him being mistreated by them. He didn't really know, since they split ways after childhood. But before that, he knew him fairly well. Dan was actually a little artsy as a kid. He had imaginative ideas and he wanted to do kooky things and play around. But he presumably grew up quicker than Danny expected, or his team mates harassed him into fit the stereotype of a “good looking jock” and he eventually merged into it after time. He believed the latter. People tended to dissolve into casts of stereotypes because it's easier to live through high school that way.“I mean…if hanging out with us means that you’re going to get kicked off or something like that, then—“ Max was cut off by Matt’s slightly harsh stare.“It’s fine Max,” he seemed a little pissed off, like he was beginning to get sick of the topic.“I just don’t want you to have enemies on your own football team,” Max tried to reason, his voice a little weak. “It’ll be fine,” he rolled his eyes, his attention quickly switching over to the waitress who was slowly making her way over to them.“It’s not fine if—““It’s fine, Max. Okay?” he snapped. The taller boy was taken aback. Danny cursed under his breath. He had a slightly hurt face now, and the slight pause between the group was not good. They all seemed to shift their gazes from each other just as the waitress came to take their order.“Are you guys ready to order?” she had a pen and paper in her hands. Max was the first to break away.“Yeah, yeah we are,” he plastered on a genuine expression. “I’ll have a pumpkin pie, thanks.”“Custard french toast.”“Buttermilk pancakes.”“I’ll have a Classic Burger.”“Brisket melt.”“And is that all?” she wrote down the last of their order.“Yes, thank you,” Max dismissed her with a perky goodbye. There was another pregnant pause. Danny sipped on his coke quietly in the corner as he watched it slowly play out.“I don’t think Max was trying to be rude,” of course it was Kurtis. He was the first one to stamp his foot when it came to an argument revolving around Matt. “Yeah, but he should let it go,” he took a few gulps of his drink. Matt's dismissing demeanour seemed to light a fire under Kurtis's ass.“You’re acting like a brat and you should cut it out,” he argued firmly. Matt crinkled his brows together.“Maybe you should just shut the fuck up Kurtis. This is bullshit,” he shoved the glass aside and slammed his fist onto the table. Danny felt a shiver down his spine. “You don’t know fucking anything, okay? Just fucking leave it alone and stop with the stupid “I’m just trying to help” thing, because it’s really not helping. Okay?”His eyes were the sharpest blue colour he had ever seen. Giving a harsh sigh, he sat back on his chair and crossed his arms over his chest.“Tell your boyfriend to calm down,” Kurtis turned his gaze over to Jason instead, who had his hand gripping onto Matt's forearm worriedly. He gave a small shake of the head over to him, signalling him to stop. Matt didn't respond. There were a few breaths of silence before Jason turned over again.“He said he’s fine,” he shifted over to Max who went pale with guilt. “So maybe you should’ve stopped.”Trust him to take the benefit of the doubt from Matt. Danny just sat back in his corner and continued to stay silent. But if he had the chance, he would run his mouth like there was no tomorrow. It seemed typical for Matt to get upset over something like that. He never really caught onto it when they first met, but he seemed more emotional than he expected. Or he just became more emotional in the last few weeks. Either way, Kurtis wasn’t having it. Though it was oddly ironic for him to be complaining about being a rash teenager. He hated it. And he seemed to hate it more that Jason was backing him up. Because now he had his arms crossed and his angry stare elsewhere. But it seemed fair enough. Jason was sharp and borderline bitchy when it came to everyone else, but when it came to Matt, he threw everything out the window. He cared about him, to a point where he was too soft. He kept on giving him chances, one after the other, and it was actually starting to piss Danny off a little. Just a little. Alongside the other two.He couldn’t help but to feel like something major was about to hit. Like a bad feeling you get because your gut is predicting something. Something shitty. Something too serious. And with this random “Brian” guy coming, this wasn’t going to be good.As their meals came, they all squirmed in the dense silence. Matt was quick to shove away his empty plate and dash away to the footballers, plastering on a smile as he was taken in by Dan with an arm around the shoulder. Fuck him for fitting in. For being socially acceptable. Jason fiddled with the last of his side salad as he tried not to meet Kurtis’s obviously pissed off expression. “Are we not going to talk about this?” Kurtis asked, drinking the last of his coke. “What? We shouldn't bitch about Matt while he's away. That's so...teen girl like,” Jason tried to cool if off with a shrug. “He was a dickhead to Max for no reason! He was just trying to help,” his reasonings sounded like an angry whine. “He's having issues right now. Okay?” Jason gave him a sharp look. “Oh with his perfect and rich family? What a shame,” he sounded so sarcastic and bitter that it even made Danny wince. “Oh fuck off Kurtis. You don't know anything,” Max seemed to shuffle further away from them and closer to Danny, as he could feel the ends of his jacket brush past his leg. “But I do know that his life is hell a lot better than some other people. Okay? You know that,” he fought back, his brows crinkled and his ego looking like it was about to crack. Danny didn't really know if it's a positive or a negative. From Max’s startled reaction, Danny figured that they had never argued like this before. Or at least in public. He wondered as to if Kurtis ever complained about Matt to Jason before. It wouldn't be too surprising. But it wouldn't end well either. “It's a little thing called ‘crystal meth’," Danny widened eyes. "And if you haven't heard of it before, it's also called a “gateway to fucking hell”,” he slammed his hand onto the table, making everyone flinch. Danny lunged over to his glass to not let it topple and spill. Kurtis tried to settle his boiling blood by clutching onto his hand and eyeing him with a look of concern and a little bit of regret. But Jason wasn’t backing down. His face somehow heated to a brighter red as he snatched his hand back and jolted back onto the seat. Danny swore that he saw Jason's eyes flicker red until he glanced down. The length of his bangs swayed to cover them. They froze when Jason sniffed. Max tucked his chin into his chest and tried to ignore the situation. Danny found himself glaring at him, though it was a tad hypocritical since he wasn’t doing anything either. “Jason I’m--” Silence.Kurtis’s first words were cut off by Jason suddenly getting up and leaving. Wiping a tear swiftly with his sleeve as he escaped the back door, they were left with anxiousness and a pool of pity. The brunette sighed to himself, dissolving whatever words he had in his throat. “I’m getting him,” he swallowed hard and parted the table, quickly dashing over to him. There was another pause. One that was much thicker and heavier than before. Danny fiddled with the end of his jacket, trying to distract himself from Max biting his lip as he nervously waited. Even he didn't know what to do. And that scared him a shit ton. If Danny had the ability to level up his confidence and let his words jump out, he would be quick to ask how Max is feeling. Or what he thought would happen next. Discuss what the fuck just exploded in front of them. But he didn't. He liked to think that he was a lot more confident than before. It's just that...it still wasn't much.Baby steps--he told himself. Small steps are just fine as long as he keeps on going forward. "...I..." Max began with a singular word, which seemed to just be a slight extension of an exhale. So...barely anything. "...I didn't think it would blow up like that.""Me either..." he mumbled back, not knowing what to say next. They sat in a few beats of silence until the waitress came. "I-I'll pay. How much will it be?"
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
It was a silent ride home. Only a small tune played in the background of Kurtis's car, but it was so quiet that no one couldn't even make out the actual song. No one was saying a single word, but from Jason’s frustrated exhales, it felt like no one was supposed to say anything anyway. Not only did the whole blowout with Kurtis fizzle out his flame--which meant that there was a crack in their strong friendship--but right now, all he could think about was Matt. He wasn’t in the car, so Jason's empty and unattended hands felt all the more numb, and his simple wave of goodbye as he dashed away with the footballers back at the diner felt like a stab to the chest. His unwillingness to give him even a simple, verbal farewell (and the lack of affection with it too) made Jason crumble on the inside. It was odd. The queer mixture of anger and misery felt unsettling in his stomach. Everyone stared out of their own respective windows in dense silence. Maybe it was a way to pretend that they were all preoccupied by something, anything, so they could avoid the awkwardness of stillness and the confrontation of what just happened. It was better this way--is what Danny said to himself as they all ignored Jason hopping out of the car. It was only Kurtis who said a goodbye to him, but it was quiet, and he ignored it. He swallowed hard and drove on.Next was Max, and that was a tad more pleasant. He said his partings himself, so it felt more natural when they all said it as a reply. “You wanna come to the front?” Kurtis asked him with a tired tone. Fair enough. He had a rough evening. Danny gave him a simple nod and rushed to the passenger seat. He heard the brochure crumpling and wrinkling as he sat down. The sudden sound through the mist of nothingness made Kurtis turn around. And from Danny’s guilt ridden face, it was obvious that something was wrong. “What'cha got in your pocket Danny?” he tried to brighten the mood with an accented voice. And it worked slightly. He chuckled and shoved his hand into his jacket. “I-I found something…” his voice flattened a little when he remembered the feel of it. Jagged and rigid. “A-And I want to show you it but--”“Okay,” he seemed a little confused at Danny’s shy state. “Go ahead.”He dug his hand in and choked the paper with his fingers. He felt it retaliate with its sharp edges. The cuts stung his palms. “This," the ball of crushed paper rocked in his faced up, open palm. Kurtis stared at it, puzzled at what it was. "I found this in Max's room."He pinched a pointed edge with the tip of his nails, in a semi nervous and semi suspicious manner. He looked like some sort of animal, trying to kick and nudge some bug with his paws. Nipping it by the corners, he stretched it out and scanned the bold text. Kurtis immediately snapped his eyes up, a terrifying mixture of fury, anger and frustration staining his expression a deep red. It made Danny coward away in fear as a chill rushed through his veins. He’d never seen Kurtis so angry before. Pissed off, maybe. Frustrated, all the time. But never full blown anger. To a point where his skin discoloured into a reddy tinge and his jaw clenched back to a sharp hiss. He drew a breath as he parted his lips. “When did you find this?” his voice was strained, and yet his words were jagged and harsh.“T-Today. When I went to his house,” he felt like he was being interrogated by the police. Like it was so serious and intense that his legs were ready to cave in, even though he wasn’t even standing. “I just…can’t…” he raised his sleeve, trying to conceal his reddening eyes. “…where did you find it…?”His words were smoothing out a little. Just a tad. Like it was dissolving under his collapsing sense of self. Danny hesitated. “His room…” he mumbled, hoping the more inaudible it was, the more likely that it wouldn’t hurt as much. But the sharp pain was still there. As piercing and agonising as ever. “Are you fucking kidding me…?” he snickered, which made it all the more painful. Sniffing, he ran his hand through his hair, revealing the all too bloodshot eyes. “…well…? Is it all true…?”Danny gulped and forced his head down. It was supposed to be a nod, but it was barely a movement. Sort of like a small jolt. But it was enough for Kurtis to try and gulp down the situation. Try being the key word, and he was hopelessly failing. He gritted his teeth against his bottom lip. “Max is stupid,” he spat. “He’s a fucking dumbass who everyone thinks is some sort of genius but he’s one shit face who doesn’t know what he’s doing,” he crinkled it in his palms, the sound making Danny’s chest hurt. “He’s destroying himself Danny. He’s really destroying himself.”“…I know…” it was barely audible, like he mouthed it. “I want to talk about it with him,”It was just a statement. More like a demand, actually. For…the world maybe…? For life to get their shit together and do something about it. To do something about Max. But honestly, Danny didn’t know what to do. He didn’t feel comfortable enough to actually talk to the boy about it. And he knew that Kurtis was stubborn and a little childish at times, so he might be confident now, but the likelihood of him actually piping out a single sentence to do with this whole mess was close to 0.001%. Kurtis was probably more likely to have hardcore sex with Matt while simultaneously becoming a Jehovah’s Witness than actually approaching Max. While topping him too. To add onto that, they don’t even confront each other about anything. If it had to be someone, it would probably be Kurtis or Jason who would bring things up, but its never anything serious. Jason knows boundaries and usually keeps to the sunny side of the splitting paths. Matt’s usually too lazy to bat an eye towards the already "crossed" bridge. And Max tends to be a little shy and outspoken when it came to these serious topics. He’s like that one mom at neighbourhood barbecues who want her two sons to shut up and say nothing so they can look like they’re getting along, even though they should probably just civilly talk it out since keeping silent about things isn’t great. So a liberal, really. People like Max are the reason why we have those posters up on councillor office walls across the world saying “Don’t be afraid to speak your mind”—And people on reddit are the reason why we shouldn't have those posters up on walls.“What are you going to say?” Danny was sort of trying to help out. More like guide him into the right direction so he doesn’t start screaming at him because…well, that’s what Kurtis does when he gets upset. “I don’t know. W-Who cares anyway?! He just needs to know that this is dumb, and stupid and—“ he was definitely upset. Mostly frustrated. From the way he stumbled with his words and his eyes paced back and forth. He was riling up from the inside out. “What if,” the younger boy jumped in to pause his sentence. He looked up at him, his eyes practically bulging out of his skull. “What if we talk to him as a group,” Danny gestured for him to take in a deep breath. He did as told. “Calmly. To show him that we want to help. There’s no use in getting mad because…he’ll just get upset. And he’s really upset already.”He tried to explain with a low and soothing voice. Danny had seen Kurtis hurt. Too many times before, really, in the past, so he tried to be as gentle as possible to not hammer in nails at his already formed cracks. “…you’re right…” he ran his hand through his hair and sniffed. He tensed his shoulder blades like he was trying to sit up straight. Look confident. “We’ll talk to him one day as a group, a-and maybe we can make him snap out of it,” he tried to subtly wipe away a tear, looking like he was rubbing his eyes instead because he was tired. But Danny knew otherwise, and he continued to brush it off to make him feel better. “Is that too hopeful?”“No, of course not,” he shook his head. “You guys are all great friends for helping him through it.”“Thanks Danny,” he gripped the steering wheel tightly. “…I needed to hear that.”“Hmm? Why’s that?” Kurtis's eyes were either distracted on the road, now that he swerved out, or were refusing to gaze at Danny's. Either way, the younger boy was quick to catch onto what he was implying. "You're not a bad friend Kurtis.""It's easy to say it, but hard to believe it," he pressed his lips together. "I made him cry the other day Danny. I still haven't forgiven myself for it. A-And I just can't bring myself to apologise.""Why?""Because it'll remind him," the car jerked underneath his pressure. "R-Remind him of what...?""Remind him of what happened," he sniffled and scratched at the inner corner of his eye to dry his waterline. "...we have this weird pact, I think."Danny arched his fingers around the seatbelt, trying to brace himself for what was to come. It was that odd feeling of knowing what he was going to say, but wanting to hear it anyway. He had caught onto it a while ago: that there was something going on with the group and fucked up situations. Why they would never talk about it as it passed. How would Danny describe it?A blood oath--okay, no that's a little too intenseSome odd habit--could be.An unspoken rule--more like."I don't even know when it began...it had to be Max. Maybe Matt, who started it," his rambles were more like mumbles."What are you talking about?""If I had to somehow explain it simply, they don't like talking. Maybe confrontation is a better word for it," he tried to sweeten it with a chuckle, but it came off like a bitter aftertaste. "Sometimes...shit gets so bad that all you want to do is forget.""Trust me, I know what that feels like," Kurtis chuckled lightly at his answer."...but I think we all want to just leave it sometimes. Leave it alone so we don't have to deal with it. Even though it means we get no closure," his grin felt so forced. It was like he was a toddler, trying to patch up large sores with the tiniest band aid. "We go through so many shitstorms everyday, that I think we just stopped caring. I'd like to say that we learnt to get over it but..." he rubbed his temples. "...I don't actually know anymore.""W-Well there's no point in dwelling on it forever, right?" Danny tried to add in a tint of encouragement into the mix so Kurtis didn't beat himself up too much. He was probably picking himself apart as they spoke. "Exactly, that's what we think...or at least I'm pretty sure. W-We've never talked about it so..." he paused to give a small exhale. "...I think we thought it was a lot easier to never talk about it. It's not that we're forgetting what happened. And fucking hell, we're not forgiving them. But...brushing it aside and instead, doping up on happiness seems like the right thing to do. Seemed like the right thing to do." He paused to give one last, long sigh. “But...it gives me the worst feeling. It's like,” he gestured through the empty space. “All this muck that builds up from left behind conversations somehow swirls together to form this pile of rubbish that sits at the bottom of your stomach like some sort of disease.”“And it's disgusting and nauseating?” Danny asked, nodding along with his horrid descriptions that honestly, seemed a little familiar. “Yeah,” he agreed with a low voice. “Dissatisfaction is honestly such a sickening feeling,” he giggled at his own comment. “And not in a good way.”“It's unsettling. Isn't it?"“Yeah...yeah it is…” he shook his head and tried to regain a constant pace for the car. “It sort of became a habit for all of us over time. A bad habit…” he bit his lip as he confessed. “That's why I'm going to change,” he sounded like those typical teenagers in drama movies who, at the end of the day, wouldn't actually change. But there was this hint in his words that made Danny think otherwise. Hope otherwise, more like. "You think I can do it, right? Danny?""Yeah, of course you can Kurtis,” he gave a reassuring smile. They were just words, but it was a start. Kurtis leaned over and clutched Danny's clasped together hands. He stared over at him with slight confusion. “Thanks Danny,” he simply said, his eyes on the road and his stance casual. The younger boy grinned. “I believe in you Kurtis,”He squeezed back and swore he saw the whole world brighten, just a bit.
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
Fuck off.Danny felt his phone buzz in his pocket, the sound drilling through the stillness of the classroom. It was probably the first time his science class fell silent in...forever. But of course Danny was the one to ruin it all with his shitty ass friends who couldn’t shut up on the group chat. And of course it was during a test too.
MATT: he’s here!
MATT: I JUST SAW HIM HOP OUT OF THE CAR
He subtly tried to sneak it out so he could glance down. If he was to get caught, it would probably result in a 0. Not like he was going to get a good result anyway.
KURTIS: guess we’ll see him at lunch
MAX: maybe you should stop texting in class
He should have probably turned off his phone alongside the rest of his classmates so the teacher didn’t have to stare down at him. But hey, it's too late now. And all he could do now was quickly finished off his paper and shoved it over to the teacher, before she could fully enforce her rage on him.Fucking suck it.Cocking a shoulder and smirking, he swung his legs over the chair and hopped up breezily.“I’m going to the bathroom miss,”Danny had an odd addiction to the rush he felt when he stood up to teachers. Recently anyway. And no, he wouldn't consider himself a hipster. Yet. It's slowly easing into him.He rushed out of the room as quickly as possible and shoved his hand into his pocket to whip out his phone.
JASON: hypocrite
MAX: it’s music
MAX: it doesn’t count
MATT: you wanna come out to the bathrooms to see him?
MATT: I just invited him out
Danny laughed to himself.
DANNY: I’m heading over now
KURTIS: going to the bathroom in a pack?
KURTIS: that makes us sound like sissy girls
JASON: wow, don’t go hurting Kurtis’s manliness now
He snorted and eyed the bathroom doors, pushing forward to peer inside. Matt had his back against the wall, phone in one hand and a lit joint in the other. They exchanged glances before a lazy grin spread across his lips and he strolled over. Exhaling out a long trail of smoke, Danny breathed it in a let a smile creep up. Matt gestured for him to take it, wiggling it in front of his vision.Danny tried to indicate that he wasn’t feeling it by lightly nudging it away. Mostly because he didn’t want to get high during school. Though it was fairly tempting and all—and the aroma of dense thickness drifting into his nostrils wasn't helping— he still had 3 periods left. And it wasn’t like Danny was some A+, good student either, but he did love music. Which was next. And he really didn’t want to be “out of it” during music.“Your loss,” he shrugged, his tone mostly uncaring and a little aloof. Maybe a little cold. Danny liked to think that Matt was too stoned to speak properly, instead of, you know, just being a straight up dick. Like he was sometimes.But then again, he wanted to give him the benefit of the doubt. He could still imagine Jason’s cracked expression from yesterday. And his words…they repeated over and over again in his head. It made his body go numb. He looked towards Matt again, who was taking a long drag of his joint. He wondered if it was a way to make himself feel better. A coping mechanism. For life? For everything to do with life? It made him ache a little.Was that too dramatic? Danny stared at the lit end of the joint. He didn’t know how often he did other drugs, and if Jason ever approached him about it. Well, he obviously knew about it.He felt odd for wanting to know more about him. Just a tad more. What did he hate about life? What was he struggling with? What would his dad do if he found out that him and Jason are together. Danny had to wrap his head around him. Him as a person. He didn’t really…get him. Properly. Compared to the rest of the group anyway.The last couple of days were tough. Really fucking tough, to say the least.Matt’s eyes lit up ever so slightly when his phone buzzed.“They’re heading over now,” he threw away the joint in the nearest trash can and cleared his throat.
KURTIS: fuck off Jason
KURTIS: I’m still coming though
JASON: you’re lucky I love you Matt
JASON: I have to escape English because of you
Before they could utter another word, the door opened to reveal the two boys, who were too deep in banter to even give them a proper greeting. It was more like a simple wave for Danny. And well, a shower of kisses for Matt from Jason.“Babe, you smell like weed,” Jason breathed into his neck, his hands clasped around his waist.“It’s just my shirt. I haven’t washed it in ages,” he spread his usual charming smile over his lips. The younger boy felt a little stiff. Jason bought it though. Danny would buy it too if he didn’t know the truth. But he did. And it made him feel a little uncomfortable.Was this the first time Matt ever lied to Jason? Probably not. But how many times did he lie to him? It made Danny feel a little uneasy.Before thoughts casted over his head, the door swung open again. A semi tall boy stood by the frame, one hand pressed up against the opened door and the other on his cocked out hip. His chin was raised high like an overdramatic diva, and his eyes were thinned like a supermodel. He inhales and lets a smile creep onto his lips slowly.“Hey guys,” he sounded perky, like one of those typical gays you find at the mall.Kurtis squealed.“Oh my god! Brian!” he yelped, throwing his arms over is shoulder and reeling him into a tight hug. He jumped enthusiastically as he cried into his shoulder. Not literally cry. That happy cry he does when he gets shit that he wants. Which was often. “I haven't seen you in forever!”“It’s so good to see you,” Matt snaked out of Jason’s grasp to go over to him, sharing a tight squeeze that seemed so familiar and comfortable with them.“It’s good to see you too Matty,” he patted his shoulder. “You haven’t changed one bit.”“You either. It’s good to have you back,” his tone seemed so delighted and sweet. Going in for another hug, the room was filled with an odd mixture of over-excitement and awkwardness.His eyes met with Jason’s for a quick second. Danny gulped.“Jason,” he parted from Matt to give him a nod. Pressing his lips together, he slowly made his way over to him.“Brian,” he sounded a little firmer at first, but he melted away his gaze to give him a chuckle and a hug. “We’ve missed you.”“I missed you too,” he exchanged looks of thankfulness. “I can’t believe this bathroom still reeks of weed,” he rolled his eyes over to Matt. “No thanks to you.”“Fuck off,” the footballer laughed.“H-Hey, how long have you been in there? It’s been like five minutes and—“Eventually Max was at the door too, pushing it open to reveal (probably) the oddest gathering of boys crowded around the stalls. It probably looked really suspicious if anyone walked in. Like a drug deal was going on. Except this time, it was more like a gay get together. Like that was any better at this school.“Oh my,” he brought his hands to his lips before dashing over to him and framed his long arms around his body. “Brian! I haven’t seen you in so long!”“Hey Max,” he grinned up at him. “You’re as tall as ever.”“You have no idea how much I struggle to get through doors,” he does that chipper chuckle he does that makes him sound so posh.“You have no idea how much I struggle to live over there,” he groaned. “There’s, like, nobody there! It’s so different without you guys.”“Well,” Kurtis grabbed Danny by the hand and tugged him into their small circle. The younger boy glanced down shyly like some sort of new kid at kindergarten. He felt out of place, to say the least. They all gushed about how much they missed about each other, and he’d never even seen him before. And he was pretty sure that he would be able to recognise that short cut, brown hair and that sneer-like grin anywhere. “This is Danny. He’s a new addition to the group.”“You brought in another gay to replace me?” he slurred with an accent, the others snickering as Danny fiddled with his hands in his pockets. “Nah, I’m kidding,” he took out a hand. “I’m Brian. Brian Firkus. Nice to meet you.”Danny smiled at the oddly formal greeting. From his accent, he could pick up a slightly country background. And it weirdly intrigued him.“Danny. Danny Noreiga.”He shook it firmly and they shared smiles. Smiles that made him predict that there was going to be more to him. And something more to the group. But he was sort of excited for it. Just a little. And Brian’s excited and sort of cute grin didn’t help either.***The first thing wrong with lunch was Danny’s food. His sandwich was shitty and it made him lose appetite quickly. He swore that his milk was off as well, making him feel nauseous at the first gulp. He low-key missed preparatory school, where they had a much higher budget (enough for them to actually afford a good quality—and yet ugly—uniform), which meant that they could get nice food at the cafeteria. Aka, actually edible burgers and deliciously favoured milk that reeked of diabetes and nostalgia. And he could always get extra too, after Courtney became a vegan. Danny somewhat yearned for the days when things were nicer.The second thing wrong with lunch was Kurtis. He would often peel away his attention from Brian’s anecdotes of Milwaukee and his travels around Wisconsin to face Max. Really obviously stare at Max too, with his eyes slightly squinted and his lips drawn out thinly. The other boy seemed to notice, but ignore it, continuing to listen to the new boy’s stories while he gulped and tried to brush away his harsh gaze. Danny was thankful that no one else noticed, except the victim, because they were distracted by Brian’s stories. Well, Matt was anyway. And Jason was mostly, if you excluded that pulling of the footballer’s arm towards his chest that translated roughly to “Stay the fuck away from him, he’s mine”. If they were to notice that odd tension between Kurtis and Max (that could be taken as “sexual frustration” if Danny didn’t know better), they would probably point it out. By Jason, most likely. And from there it could be taken in two directions. One, where Kurtis snapped out of it and plastered on a smile, which was so obviously fake but Jason would give him the benefit of the doubt anyway. Or two, where he doesn’t deny it and he brings it up to Max.He’ll probably say something like, “Oh, sorry. I was too shy to ask Max about this interesting brochure I read the other day and, it had something to do with…homophobia…?”, accompanied with a gay-looking gesture and an overdramatic tone which made him look more like a bottom somehow. And then the grey haired boy would shiver and glance away like he didn’t know any better. That’s how it would go down in Danny’s mind at least. It was more likely to be the latter, but it wasn't good either way. So Danny just held his breath, and chimed into Brian and his stories that were more interesting than anything all 5 of them have done in the last 5 years combined. He was happy that he was confident and borderline self-centred enough to just talk about his own experiences. Danny would have panicked if he asked them to recite what they had done in the last few weeks. What would they go with?Max — how he was going to perform a solo at the auditorium of music, which was much more exciting and serious than everything the other 4 had done.Kurtis—and how he crashed the car, which wasn’t actually that positive, now that Danny thought about itJason—and how he got full blown punched by Brad in the hallways, which also wasn’t that great either…did anything good happen to these boys?Matt—and how he…wait does he do anything? Danny likes him as a person—no doubt about that—but did he go through anything shit? Compared to them, well it seemed like a no. He wondered if that was one of the benefits of being popular. Probably. And he was a little jealous. Oh wait. He scored a single goal or something at that last game. Touchdown? Home run? Danny didn’t fucking know. Danny—…okay, so he wasn’t much better. He’d like to think that going into a car with a drunk Kurtis was both thrilling and semi badass, and not idiotic and stupid.…so obviously Brian was much more interesting then them. For now. Until he runs out of those stories and then they’ll go back to banter and Matt bullying Kurtis. Which Danny low-key liked because he thought it was funny.But right now, Brian seemed to also be good at banter. He was wittier than Danny had expected. Really on his toes with his comments. He seemed to be braver than Max, and smarter than the rest, and yet oddly similar to all of them. So it basically created some mess of a teenager who had the oddest fashion sense, daddy issues and a strong attitude. Oh and he played the clarinet. That too.The third thing wrong with lunch was…well…Brian. Sort of. You know how Brian was witty? Yeah, well it meant that he could catch any jab thrown at him and hurl it back twice as hard. It was something that Jason said that made him snap. Danny wasn’t exactly paying attention, because it was pretty common for him to just zone out during long stories, but he knew something happened when the cheerleader’s jaw dropped and his eyes looked as if they were about to pop out of his skull. Okay, so it wasn’t like some legendary and rare occurrence for him to be offended, but it was how Matt reacted that threw Danny off.He was laughing. The Matthew Lent James had his head titled back, piping out chuckles which were directed at Jason. The Jason that he spent every day of his life adoring. Along with someone he hated too. Brian. The one that made Jason’s lip curl down just at the name before he came.Jason must have said one of those comments that made him look really cocky. The ones that just skim the line between confidence and disdain, for comedy purposes (or that’s what Danny thinks anyway; who knows? He might be serious). And then, insert Matt’s small giggle here. Like he always does because he finds him so charming.“Sometimes it’s better to keep your mouth shut and give the impression that you’re stupid than open it and remove all doubt,” Brian chewed on his food, his tone aloof and blaze.Jason snapped his attention over to him and…cue his offended face.And that’s when Matt laughed louder than Danny had ever heard. Borderline cackling as he slapped Brian on the shoulder to try and brace his fit of laughter. It wasn't really what he said that was funny, but his delivery. It felt so carefree and bitchy. That sort of bitchy where you laugh because it’s hilarious, but you know you'd feel hurt if it was directed at you. And that was Jason at that moment.“Well that’s rude,” he commented back, his tone ice cold as he folded his arms. He rolled his eyes back and pursed his lips.“It was a joke,” Brian brushed it off with an amused chuckle. “Don’t take it seriously.”He didn’t reply with a direct comment. He instead, just glanced away and thinned out his eyes.“We all joke around with each other Jason,” Matt defended (what Danny thought was) the wrong side. Mostly because Jason would flip. And well, he sort of did. His eyes widened and he swung his head around to face his boyfriend who was sitting next to him. “It’s what friends do.”“Yeah, but he's no friend,” Jason threw at him. Kurtis scoffed at the comment and tried not to giggle. “Brian, you can’t just come back and expect everyone to worship you. You didn’t even sit with us for the last couple of months before you left.”“Yeah, I’ll give you that. But is anyone really complaining that I’m here except you?” he blinked open his eyes widely as he gave an amused smile. “Even little Danny Boy isn’t complaining.”“Yeah but I still don't consider you a friend,” he refused to meet his gaze. “So maybe you should lay off.”“I’ll lay off being funny if you lay off being a complete fucking bitch,” he spat back, his words messy but his tone still spiked with confidence. Maybe it was his borderline theatrical expression, but he looked like he was head and shoulders above Jason, who’s ego was slowly crumbling.“Umm, coming from you?” “Yes, coming from me, because I have more to my personality than being a whiny bitch and dating a hot-ass footballer to fuel my own ego,” he sparred further, his tone equally as sarcastic as it was rude. “Oh fuck off. You’re fucking shitting me if you think you're some modest saint,” he jabbed back. “The difference is, I have the right to be because I’m actually capable of holding a conversation,”“Okay Brian, that’s enough,” Kurtis buts in, just in time to cut off Jason who was presumably going to scream at him or slap him. “Maybe we should change the subject. I heard that Brian M was paid to throw a decapitated mouse’s head into the counsellor’s office.”“Yeah, thats realistic. He has tendencies to be—““I’m leaving,” Jason shoves away Brian’s comment as he zipped up his bag and swung it over his shoulder.“Wait. Don't go,” Matt reached over to him, giving him a look of concern.“I can’t stand to be near that guy,” he glared over to him, who replied with a chirpy chuckle.“It was a joke Jason. I don't get why you’re so offended,” Danny wanted to classify this as the fourth thing wrong with lunch. He wanted to clarify Matt as someone who wasn't self aware, because someone in their right mind would not say something like that to their own boyfriend. Especially after they just got beaten down to the ground by someone they didn't like.“I’m offended, because he doesn't shut the fuck up. Ever,” he stood up and dusted his pants.“Umm, neither does Kurtis,” Matt replied, chortling a little at his comment.“Oh fuck off. I’m not even in this,” he whined, Max snorting from the side lines.“And he always thinks he's on top of the world,” he stared over again to give him a stern look. “Hasn’t changed a bit since elementary school. Or middle school.”“Like you don't do that Jason,” he was firmer than he intended to be. And Jason was more hurt than he intended to be. But he didn’t back down with his gaze as the younger boy glanced down and scrunched up his fists.“…fine,”He stormed off, steps rough and breath heavy.“Wait Jason!” Kurtis gathered his bag and scrambled after him, trying to gain the casualty he needed to act like he's fine. Except he barely could. Because he was genuinely shocked.Danny watched the ashy grey-greens of their jackets fade from the emerald field (which he still loved for its colour and aura). He wrapped his arms around his legs and pulled it closely to his chest.“Was it too harsh?” Brian spoke up, sounding a tad regretful.“Don't worry about it. Jason can get like this sometimes,” Matt tried to reassure him, though his eyes lingered a little at Jason’s disappearing figure.“Aren't you gonna apologise?”Danny felt his lips quiver slightly at his own comment. He wasn't the one to speak up in this group, (mostly because, no matter how much time went on, he felt like the new kid. Either because the other four were too close, or he was young so it just wasn't the same), so it felt plain odd. And it made the others turn around and eye him strangely.“I don’t…” Matt cleared his throat. “I don't want to…right now…”“O-Okay, just asking.”Danny couldn’t muster up the courage to talk any more than that. He just left Max to do all the talking. It was like he was passing the baton over to him or something. And the tall boy seemed to be able to gather a whole bunch of nothing and start a conversation.“Did you see Kurtis’s shoes? Where do you think he got them from?”“Oh those grey ones?” Brian joined in. “They were so extra. Such a Kurtis thing to do.”Thank god for that. Maybe he should be a theatre kid after all. Maybe talk to Roy about putting him in the next musical. Actually no. First of all, he needed to talk to Roy. Period.
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Danny didn’t know what to do. It was him, Kurtis and Jason, in the cheerleader’s bedroom. He was pacing back and forth, his arms punched down to his side and frustration bursting from his lips. “I can't believe it! I can't fucking believe it!” he crossed his arms over his chest. Danny felt a tad bad for Jason. He seemed so hurt, to a point where his emotions were exploding from his chest and he was frantically trying to patch it up with rants and insults. Kurtis, on the other hand, was nonchalantly nodding towards everything. He seemed to give up after the first hour, going from the understanding, kind best friend, to an uncaring, tired friend who couldn't be bothered to listen to his first world problems anymore."That's great Jason…” was the only phrase he bothered to say, only scraping together the leftover crumbs of effort he had lingering like dust by his throat. “That prick! Such a fucking jerk, who doesn't even know which side he's supposed to be on,” he exhaled and plotted down at the foot of the bed. Kurtis parted his gaze from his phone screen to view his friend, eventually exhaling and shuffling over to him. Placing a hand onto his shoulder, he peered towards him with a frown. “I said this before, but you need to listen. Okay?” They exchanged nods. “He didn't mean to hurt you. He was just laughing along with a friend he hadn't seen for a while. A friend, who I might add, that he considers really close. I'm pretty sure he just wanted to encourage him to stay.”“...yeah, but still,” he glanced away and pursed his lips. “He never does that. Ever. Since Brian left anyway…” Jason knew he sounded like a pathetic whiner, but he continued. “I don't hate Brian. I think he can be cool and stuff but...I don't like the way Matt acts when he's around him. He changes. For the worse.”“Maybe its, like, old habits coming back again. From middle school,” Kurtis reasoned further, a small but thoughtful and caring smile by his lips. “You know that we only became a four in high school. And well,” he looked over to Danny who was tucked away at the other side of Jason’s bed, his legs crossed and his stare tentatively directed at the two. “Now a 5, in senior year.”“I get where you're coming from, but like…” Jason gnawed on his bottom lip. “...I still want to piss him off. Like, get back at him. I-It doesn't make sense to me! I'm here, supporting him with everything he's going through, and Brian left the moment we hit high school. He sat with Brian M for years!”Kurtis sighed. “That's true,” he acknowledged with a press of his lips. “Well I have a plan...but Matt’s not gonna like it,” the younger boy’s eyes glistened a little from excitement. “When has that stopped you?” he snickered. “Yeah, that's true,” he rubbed his hands together like he was collecting up thrill for this plan, that Danny was somewhat worried about because it was a Kurtis plan. And you never really know where that's gonna go. For Matt too. And that might be potentially dangerous, in every way possible. “Well, was is it?”“A really good friend of yours is gonna come and play.”***“So we need that deep indigo cloth to hang from there,” Max gestured above the stage lights. Matt lazily messed with the long trail of blue material. “This bluey thing?” He wrapped the see-through fabric around his wrist and dangled it like a bored cat with a piece of string. “Indigo is a shade of blue, isn't it?” He snatched it off of him and rolled his eyes at his dull and sleepy state. He was so tired that he didn't even catch onto the sarcasm. “Is that a trick question?” He slumped himself down on the chair and crossed his arms. Max parted his lips to scold him, but Brian was quick to swoop in and cut him off. “So Matt’s had a hard day, that's obvious,” he rested his hands onto his shoulders. “But you can't blame him. Can you? Jason was pretty upset at him and--”“I don't fucking care,” he ran his fingers through his hair. “I'm fucking sick of him being all moody all the time. It was a stupid joke and he should get over it.”“...well alright then,” Brian took the chair next to him and gave up. “Look Matt, I'm upset about Jason, and I secretly hope that he's feeling better too...” he tried to hint onto something but Matt replied with a small roll of the eyes. “...but we have bigger things on our hands right now,” he gestured over to the large banner reading “Annual Ball” hung above them. “Remember this?”“Yeah that…” Matt didn't seem any more interested. Max crinkled his brows together, somewhat towards his attitude and somewhat towards the stress. For something that only a handful of people actually cared about, he was putting a lot of effort into it. It was one of those events that the school held to ensure that the American stereotype still existed through the nation. You know, for tradition or some shit. It didn't really matter. Seniors and juniors would show up in pretty or handsome, sleek outfits to show off to each other. Well, mostly the popular kids, with their expensive outfits and over the top makeup. And then they would call out king and queen and everyone would act like they don't care even though most kids actually wanted to be up on the stage to win that plastic head piece that would probably cost around $10 at the store. But really, the only people who seemed to put effort into it are the people who plan the event, and those who are popular enough to get nominated for the stupid title of being king, or royalty or something. “No reply?” Max questioned Matt with a harsh tone. “Fine,” he gave one long, deep sigh before he lowered the fabric onto the table. “What if I give you a job you do like? Like, uhh...” he pondered. “Creating a playlist for the ball. I mean, you've recently been into DJing and things, right?”“I-I need to clear my head,” Matt abruptly got up and jolted away, leaving Max to sigh and Brian to contemplate whether to stay in this group. “I'm sorry Brian. It's not usually like this,” Max tried to reassure. “I knew it wasn't going to be easy when I decided to sit with you guys,” he chuckled. “I didn't expect anything less.”Max smiled. “Well, I'm glad you're understanding,” he grabbed the cloth still lying on the table. “But that doesn't excuse you from helping me out. Now come here, I need you to lift this up.”***You know that stupid feeling you get when you contemplate your situation? Like that heavy feeling? Because you know that you're guilty, and yes, you've heard it so many times that you were too tough and that you chose the wrong side; but you're so stubborn. So stupid that you can't go against the guilt? Your own word? Yeah, that's Matt right now.And he's handling this whole shitstorm by throwing rocks (and he's hoping his frustrations too) by the school's field. Even though it's been hours since the end of school. He wondered if his dad thought he was sneaking off to smoke again. No matter how many times he tried to convince him that he was helping Max out (which he was...originally...) he didn't seem to buy it. He barely even did it anymore...sort of. Only on occasion when Jerrick feels nice enough to shout him some. And the rest of the stuff? Well that's from Brian number 2. He really didn't know where all that shit came from. All he knew was that the high made him feel like he could escape forever and it was hell of a lot better than spending every waking moment in this cruddy little town.It was around the time Matt was about to head home when he ran into the two Brians. They were peering from the other side of the fence, smoothies in their hands. "What are you still doing here?" his friend called, twirling his colourfully striped straw between his fingers. "Uhh I..." he rubbed the back of his neck.Brian sighed to himself as he ducked underneath the small hole at the bottom of the fence, which he could just manage to squeeze through. He took a spot near his feet and patted the spot next to him, indicated for Matt to sit down too. "Are you thinking about Jason?" he asked taking a long sip of his icy drink."I'm thinking about life in general," he bent his knees to his chest. "Contemplating it?" he tossed the cup towards him and watched as he took a gulp. Giving a reluctant nod he passed it back. "Understandably. Isn't that what most people do these days?" Brian M commented, an oddly delightful grin by his lips. He seemed so weirdly joyful in this topic that it made Matt's lips curl. “What else would you do when all you see around here are endless horizons of boring-looking houses and white people?”"That's true,” he chuckled lightly. “And all you do in your free time is go to church.”"That," he pointed a finger towards him, and held the other by the tip of his nose. "Is exactly right pussy willow.""Ehem," Brian F cleared his throat to intrude. "Anyways, how are you handling things?""What do you mean?" he skipped over the question with a sarcastic remark. "Everything's great Brian.""Argh, I hate it when you think you're smart enough to use sarcasm," Matt could basically feel Brian roll his eyes next to him. "I don't think you're handling this the right way.""You're the one who started it!" "That's not the point. I can get away with being a dick to Jason. You can't because you're..." he glanced over to Brian who was staring right back at him with intrigued eyes. "...good friends...?""Oh no, I know they're fucking," he slurped his drink. "Continue.""Well, I'm sorry for sticking up for you," Matt exhaled frustration."I'm not trying to get mad at you. You both have valid arguments, really. It's just..." he put a hand onto his shoulder. "...when's the last time Jason listened to someone else? Compromised for someone? Actually took in someone else's opinion?""He does do that...just not very often," he glanced away. "Are you sure you want to be with someone who doesn't care enough to take in your opinions?" when Brian tried to bring him in closer, Matt winced away. "He does care!" he shuffled out of his grasp. "I know he does. I-I just need to think by myself for a bit. Just give me some time..."Brian sighed."I'll give you all the time you need," he chucked him the rest of his drink, which was three quarters of the way empty. "But you better talk to him sometime soon and sort this whole shit out.""I will...eventually..." he reluctantly gave him a nod. "Also," as Brian began to stand up, he looked below at Matt one last time. "You should probably help out your bestie.""Huh?""For the annual ball. He told me that he's been working on it for months," they were already at the fence now, Brian M theatrically bowing for Brian F to go first. He laughed in return and crawled under the tight little hole. "Really?" he almost whispered to himself, feeling the guilt. "Yeah," he called back, somehow hearing Matt's words. "But he says that you only listen when you're 'out of it' so I guess you just don't remember."Matt parted his lips. "Oh shit..."He gulped down the rest of the icy drink and felt the chill down his throat. He already royally fucked up his relationship. He wasn't going to do that to his best friend too.
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
ROY: hey
ROY: do you mind coming over to help me with something?
It was late afternoon when Roy decided to text him. Danny was fiddling around on his laptop, skimming through his playlists on Spotify just like Max asked him to do. It was for that stupid “annual ball” thing that Courtney would go on about on their walks home, which Danny really couldn’t care less about. I mean, he listened, but it didn’t exactly excite him too much.
He planned to show up in a black suit and a matching tie, with his hair maybe gelled back if he was pressured enough to do so by his mom. He would probably wear the same thing next year too, since both juniors and seniors were invited. Danny had a weird conspiracy theory that they combined the years for the ball so the popular kids could soak in as much applause and cheering as possible, before they would slave away at university and realise they had nothing going for them at the age of 40, and school popularity really did mean nothing at the end of the day. But really, it was probably because they had smaller year groups. Danny’s year was already small enough, and more were planning to leave by the end of the year. And the year above him was basically non existent. There seemed to be some sort of “drop out” trend present at their school. Either way, Max had asked him to gather music for the event. Yes, because having a boy who only listened to punk rock was a great DJ. He heard that Matt’s secret talent was mixing music so he wondered why Max didn’t put him onto the task. Maybe he was busy with something. Most likely, he distracted by Jason. Or his little shipping heart would like to think so.
DANNY: uhh sure
DANNY: with what?
He probably needed a break anyway. He painfully peeled his gaze away from the screen to face his phone. Rubbing his eyes, he yawned and shut his laptop as he pushed himself away from the desk. His usual grey jacket slumped over his shoulders as he trotted downstairs and turned the knob of his front door. It was getting much warmer these days. Trees began to sprout their new leaves; flowers were starting to regain colour; and it seemed like birds were starting to sing melodies again. But the air still had that tint of sharpness to it, which made Danny swing the hood over his shaggy hair. It was like this last time he went to Roy’s house. Properly went to his house, so not that time he asked for a favour to quickly pick up Courtney. That seemed like ages ago when it really wasn’t. Maybe it’s because so much happened in the last few months.Danny wouldn’t like to admit it, but he felt chills when he stood by Roy’s house. It was as perfect looking as he remembered. It’s a house that looked much better during the day than at night. You just can’t see the beautiful sheer petals in the front garden while its dark.He noted that it’d changed colours. The family must have planted some new flowers. He remembered that they used to be a bright red. A really striking and piercing red. Ones that somehow made him more excited when he looked at them.Last time he went, it was a sunny day like this one. Must be around 3 years ago. He had a pillow under his right arm and a backpack swung over his left. It was odd because they were next door neighbours, and yet Danny carried days worth of clothes because he was just that excited. He wasn't the type to get invited to sleepovers often. He could never really figure out whether they thought he was gay so they found him creepy, or he just lacked friends. Probably both. But for once in his life, he decided to ask Roy himself. He wondered, at the time, whether he would want to. He’s a year older, and that age gap basically means nothing when you're an adult, but it means everything when you're younger. And Danny was pretty scared to admit that him and Roy weren’t that close anymore. So he decided to ask him out to a sleepover. At his house though…because he liked looking at the amazingly decorated interior. Also, Jay and Gia asked him out for another Friday gathering, and he was sick to death of being the third wheel. Danny, to this day, gets flashbacks the moment he lays his eyes on the number ‘3’. Even without that, he was still really excited to hang out with Roy. Just one on one. It hadn’t happened in…well a really long time. He somehow still remembered little 15 year old Roy opening the door, the largest smile on his face when Danny was excitedly waiting. It made him feel like a kid again, seeing his best friend by the door before they would jump onto the couch and play video games. Except this time, they watched a movie. Roy laid back against his sofa, remote in hand as he flicked through the channels. Someway somehow, Danny managed to convince him to watch “Bring it On” with him. Presumably he said something like “Oh, its Courtney’s favourite movie and she wants me to watch it”, or something like that. Even though in reality, it was his guilty pleasure and he really just enjoyed watching it. Danny really regretted choosing the movie. Nonetheless say the things that he did. “What? Are you gay or something?” Roy chuckled, shoving him lightly before he propped back up. “W-What?” little Danny stuttered, feeling a lump in his throat. “Of course not! Fuck off.”And they exchanged small pockets of laughter like it was casual. When it really wasn’t. For Danny anyway. And then he had to, of course, mention that he wanted it to be a lesbian movie. You know, because Torrance and Missy were really cute together, and they definitely had much more chemistry than her and whats-his-name. But it was one of those things you couldn't point out, even though everyone thinks so. Right? Thats what Danny thinks. But that’s not what Roy thought at all. He gave him the weirdest look, like disgust and confusion mixed into one. That wasn't the first time either. He gave him the exact same look when Danny wanted to watch a romance movie. Maybe it was a “16 year olds” thing. Like, it was something that all teenagers do, because they're all opinionated as fuck and they think they know everything. But it hurt Danny anyway. He remembered tucking himself into his sleeping bag that night and staring at the ceiling, praying to God that Roy didn't find him creepy.Actually praying. Silently crying and clutching his chest. Begging for him to not lose one of the only friends he had.
“Uhh…have you been standing there for the last few minutes?”
Roy opened the door and looked towards Danny with a raised eyebrow. The younger boy quickly dabbed his sleeve over his glassy eyes and smiled.“Yeah, sorry. T-Those flowers looked nice,” that was one hell of a dumb excuse. Roy laughed.“Thanks, I thought the purple complimented the curtains really well so I had to get them,” no straight guy cared about the appearance of houses this much, right? Danny was hoping. “…so are you gonna come inside or…?”“Right! Yeah,” he took a step inside and unzipped his jacket. Danny was undeniably a little jumpy today.
And there was no doubt that he was gonna be more excited for what's to come.
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
“So, what’cha need help with?” Danny tried to brighten the mood with a slightly tacky opening, and Roy was quick to take it and laugh. “I’m organising another play,” he explained, guiding him up the staircase and down the hall towards his room. "Well, a musical to be exact."Danny found a comfortable spot by the edge of his bed, which is where he seemed to sit every time he came over. Though it’s really been years since he had. It was odd. It still felt the same. As cushiony as ever. Tucking his legs above the bed to cross them, it honestly felt like they were young again. Except all his comic books and car magazines were swopped with school textbooks and binders which sort of pained Danny. Why couldn't they just be young forever?“Oh, that’s cool,” he watched as Roy pulled out his notebook from the drawers of his desk. “Tell me what it is.”“It’s the “Heathers”,” he said, flipping through his pages which were all filled with endless cursive and messy scribbles. Danny gasped.“I love the Heathers! Oh my god, it’s such a classic,” he excitedly clapped his hands together. Roy grinned. “And not only do I want you to be in it but—““Really?!” Danny gasped, widening his eyes. Roy chuckled. “Are you getting overwhelmed with all these surprises?” he teased with a sneer, his smile stretching out when he saw Danny jump up and down.“Of course I fucking am!” he bit down on his lip to contain his ever-growing excitement. “I can’t believe you’d choose me! Thank you so much!”“Why wouldn’t I want to cast one of the most fucking talented singers in this whole goddamn school?” he laughed, sounding as if there was no other person, in the world, he could cast other than Danny. “Are you fucking kidding me?”“I don't know!” he pursed his lips. “I haven’t been in your plays for years…”“Because you’ve never auditioned,” he argued, his voice still sweet. “But now you have no choice but to be in it. Okay?”“Okay,” he tried to keep his blush to himself.“Oh, but other than that,” he flipped the book over and placed it by his lap. “I have this character I’m trying to sort out,” he pointed the capped end of the pen by a blank space. It was under the subtitle “Kurt”. “I’ve seen you with Jason recently and I sort of need help with this character.”Danny raised an eyebrow.“Kurt is nothing like Jason,” he stated with confusion.“I know but…how should I say this in an…appropriate way…?” he cleared his throat. “I sort of want to “Gay Up” this character, if you know what I mean.”Danny knew that Jason wasn't directly out of the closet. He never dared to claim such a thing with the people at their school. But maybe it was painfully obvious. He didn't exactly do a good job at hiding it. However, Danny had respect for him. It wasn’t right to just out him like that, so he decided to play the role of a clueless friend. Even though he was lying to Roy, which pained him.“J-Jason’s not gay though…is he?” he sounded as unsure as those achingly guilty people in movies. But now he was one of them. Damn it. “Well, he sort of acts like it,” he shrugged. “I just want to replicate some of his vibes into Kurt’s character you know?” “Hmm, okay. What do you need to know?” now Danny could take this in two ways. He could either be glad that Roy wanted to talk to him and spend time with him. Even if it’s over a play. Danny loved his plays, and he fucking loved spending time with Roy, so it was a win win. But, he could also take it as a sign. A sign from the world that’s telling him that his closeted state wasn't stable. No matter how many times Jason told him that he was ‘in the closet’, everyone knew he was gay. He looked gay. He acted gay. And he hell of a lot sounded gay. And if the crowd shifted their gaze towards Kurtis, they’d see the same label. And then to Max. And then, fucking hell, maybe to Matt. And of course it’ll go to Danny. The one that’s always been made fun of for being a “fag”. The one that used to do anything, oh god anything, to not be known as one. To not be known as himself. And he didn’t want to be back in that dark place again. Danny was scared that his world was going to turn upside down. He was walking on thin ice. The moment Brad caught onto them. Their group. And how it all worked, they were all gonna be in for one hell of a shit storm. And he wasn’t really ready for it. He wondered if he would ever be ready for it.“So what’s he like? What does he do in his free time? Likes, hobbies, interests,” Roy stared tentatively at Danny, his eyes wide and circular and his lips just parted. He gulped. His eyes had this twinkle that made Danny heat up. It was just so…charming? Cute? Oddly alluring? Maybe it was a mix of all those things. “Umm…he likes fashion. Quite a lot. It’s something that him and Kurtis bond over,” Danny gave in to the feeling of guilt he would probably feel if he was to lie.What would he say? That Jason was a manly man who liked sport? Of course not. It was too much of a lie and Roy would find it funny instead.“And they’re best friends, right?” Danny nodded.“Yeah, really good friends,” he chuckled as he reminisced their conversations.They had a dynamic that Danny had always wanted in a friend. They seemed to adore each other, and get exactly where each other came from, and even though they fought sometimes, everyone knew it was from a place of love. For self-centred people, they really looked after each other and Danny was slightly jealous of it. They’d make the same joke at the same time. They reference the same gay shit whenever it came up into conversation. And they somehow supported each other no matter what. “Does he sit with you guys too?” Roy continued to write as he questioned.“Yeah, also Matt and Max,” he informed, pressing his back against the wall.“Group of 5. Nice number to work with,” he commented with a mildly entertained smile.“Currently a 6 actually,” he rolled his eyes. He didn’t really have a problem with Brian…except he had a lot of problems with Brian.He somehow became the poster child for what he wanted to be, but also a criminal on a Wanted Poster he wanted to stab. He thought he was funny, he thought he was pretty cool, and the amount of confidence he had raged envy within him. But the stupid fight started because of him, and he was much happier when he was friends with every member of the group. That way, he felt more useful. More needed in the group. “Who’s the 6th?” he looked up, gliding his office chair over to him. “Brian, Brian Firkus,” he probably did the worst job at hiding his distaste for the boy.“I thought he left, like, a year ago,” he sprayed his fingers across his cheek and propped his elbow by the side of the bed. Ah, shit. Danny really did hate it when Roy paid attention to him this much. He didn’t really get why. It just made him flustered a little. He’d thought that it was because no one noticed him usually so he was uncomfortable with attention, but he soon found himself liking it a tad too much.“Y-yeah, he’s over for this weird exchange students thing,” he sighed.“Mmm, I’m guessing you don't like him much?” Danny pinched his nose at the response, making him laugh. “There’s nothing wrong with him as a person but —“ “Do you feel slightly rejected because another guy just came in and fit right in with the friends you established without him?” Danny nodded. “Yeah, well, I’m pretty they'd all been friends before he left. Or at least good enough to sit with them. Don't take it personally Danny. I’m sure they still appreciate you.”“But I don't even know what they're talking about half the time! They keep on going on and on about weird shit thats happened in the past. Why are they keep on bringing McCook? Who even is that?” he rambled, burying his face into his palms.“Ohh, Brian McCook? Yeah, he’s the guy who probably makes most of his money off of drug dealing. The rest is presumably from distributing crappy sci-fi films illegally. Him and Firkus are “besties” or as friendly you can get without fully dating,” he snickered. “Is it just me or there’s a lot of sexually questionable people in our school? At least, for a Christian-loving, church-going community?”Danny zipped his lips together and shrugged stiffly. Oh shit. If this was going where Danny was dreading then he swore to god—“You wanna can of soda?” he wheeled himself over to a mini fridge tucked behind his desk. His head jerked into an odd nod. “Coke’s fine?”“Y-Yeah,” Roy tossed it over to him, the younger boy somehow catching it, even though he’d probably never caught a ball in his life. “Can I tell you something Danny?” the older boy shuffled to his side, taking the empty spot next to him by his bed. Danny gulped.“Yeah sure,” his voice lowered to sound more masculine. It’s what he tended to do when he was nervous.“I don’t know if I agree with this “religion thing” all the time,” he exhaled. “I mean yeah, I believe in it but…what does the creation of the universe got to do with love? And who you love? And why does religion have to dictate how you think? And just—“ he shook his head. “I cant wrap my head around it. I’ve been brought up one way and that’s all I know, but who knows what’s out there.”“I agree,” Danny cracked his can open, the fizzing sounding extremely comforting now. The sugary drink bubbled in his mouth as he gulped it down. Everything felt so…heavy and confusing. He imagined realisation to feel a lot lighter, like his shoulders were going to curve back and he could stand up tall. But what Roy said…it was true. You don't know any different when you're raised here. No one really made it out of this town. If you’re born here, you’ll most definitely stay here. But he wanted to see something different. He wanted to do something different. And that feeling, especially, felt heavy and confusing. Because he didn’t know how to get there.“I think I want to leave when I graduate,” Roy said so simply, that it didn't strike Danny as anything too shocking. Just his eyes widening. “Do you know where you wanna go? What you wanna do?” the older boy shook his head. The Roy; the one who’s always organised, the one who has everything covered doesn’t have a plan for once. And its his future. “I’ll figure it out along the way,” he shrugged. “It feels sort of exciting to me, you know?” he took a long gulp of his drink. “That I’m doing something bold and exciting for once.”“You’re gonna regret it,” Danny spewed out accidentally, giggling so it didn't come across too blunt or sharp. “Look at Mr. Noriega, trying to look out for me,” he sneered. “I’ll be okay. I don't even know if I’ll do anything. Just a dream I suppose,” he rested his can on his windowsill. “In the mean time,” he grabbed his notebook again and flipped to his original page. “Casting. You think you can help me with that too?”Danny blinked.The sudden change of topic gave him whiplash. Maybe its because he’s a dreamer so he dwelled on what will happen in the future, but Roy didn't seem to care at all. Maybe they were really different.Or he was good at hiding that he did care. He treated escape like it was nothing, though that’s what Danny wanted more than anything right now. Just to be able to take a step out and have a quick inhale of the real world.“First of all Kurtis. It’ll be ironic because of his name. He can sing right?” Roy had already jumped to the next topic by the time Danny snapped back into reality.“Yeah, he can sing,” his mind instantaneously struck the memory of him leaning over Jason’s kitchen counter, some drink in his hand as he hummed. What a picturesque person. “Can he act?” “…no. No he can’t,” he’s a terrible liar.“Dang it,” he ran his fingers through his hair and glanced down at the page again. “What about Max?” Danny tried to brighten the mood by putting his own suggestion in. He did promise himself that he would talk to Roy about it, and this seemed like the bet opportunity. He scoffed as a response. “…Max?” he questioned with a very high brow. “Yeah, Max,” he nodded. “Are you talking about Max Malanaphy?” Danny continued to nod. “Tall one. Grey hair, sorta nerdy, comes across as a huge perfectionist and know-it-all?”“Yeah, that Max,” he confirmed with a grin. “…he doesn’t really come across as a theatre type to me,”“Really? Because he’s really fitting if you get to know him,”“I’m pretty sure every man involved in theatre needs to have some strain of extroverted characteristics,”“But I’m in it,”Roy paused, and then sighed, as if he was giving in.“Fine. You got a point there,”Did Danny win an argument? No, the real question was: Did Danny win an argument against Roy? Yes, the correct answer was yes. An incredibly thrilling yes.“So…”“So,” Roy rolled his eyes, but let a smile creep up anyway. Gathering from Danny’s enthusiasm, the younger boy was quite happy about his decision. And that made him all the more sure that he was doing the right thing. “I’ll consider him for the part.”“Really?!” “Yes really, Danny,” he rolled his eyes and gave a small exhale. “And stop your yelling. You’re mom can probably hear you from here.”“Well that’s good! Because then, she can know how much of an amazing and giving person you are!” he exclaimed, rejoicing by throwing his arms up into the air. Roy cracked up as he messed his locks playfully. “You’ve always been such a childish person Danny,” he commented with a beam. “I’ll take that as a compliment, thanks,” he laughed.“Its a good thing. It’s a great thing actually,” he wrapped his palm around his can and brought it to his lips. “You’ll always make me feel like we’re little toddlers. No matter what,” he paused to spread his smile wider. “You’ll always be my childhood.”
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
Kurtis’s harsh and serious gaze made the whole atmosphere thick. That bad thickness that made Danny gulp from the moment he lowered himself by their usual spot. Well, there was one positive. Talking to Roy really did help. Now, Max was at the first rehearsal for the musical. Danny remembered seeing his face drop when Roy approached him about it. It was when Max was gathering his books at his locker for period 3 when Roy swooped his way towards him with a smug grin. First of all, singing scared Max. In front of a large group of people...yeah that was unthinkable. Like on a stage, in front of all the people he despised at the school. But Roy seemed to nudge him on, encouraging him with that irresistible smile and cute presence. And it worked. It basically works on anyone who is even slightly attracted to males. And it doesn't matter how much you deny it, it’s true. And maybe Max would enjoy it there. According to Danny’s own imagination, the AAA girls were playing the Heathers. Of course they would be. The most popular, most liked girls in school would most definitely be the stars of the musical. Except well...Veronica. Aka, the actual protagonist of the show. She was played by Sharon. And no. That’s not from Danny’s brain. It’s actually from Roy himself who said her audition was amazing one afternoon they hung out. You know, that weird goth girl who had bleached blonde, near-white hair that made her look like a ghost. And only wore black or dark, dark, dark grey. Basically him but she's friends with Alaska somehow. Like really good friends. Why couldn’t he have friends who ruled the school like that. “There’s something we need to talk about,” Danny shook away his thoughts and faced Kurtis, who was now eyeing everyone intensely. Brian put down the water bottle by his lips and proceeded to roll his eyes. “Staring that hard is going to give you wrinkles,” he kidded with a light chuckle. The older brunette was quick to pick at his skin like some nervous beautician. “But if we need to talk about it, shouldn't Max be here?”That’s when it hit Danny.Well maybe Kurtis wasn’t such a coward after all. Underestimated him by a landslide. Wait, what did Danny compare him to earlier? Oh shit. Does that mean he needs to become a Jehovah's Witness now? “Well the thing is…” he bit down on his lip which basically anticipated everything that was to come. “...it’s about Max.”“Are we bitching about Max right now? Because I really needed to mention his overuse of jackets. It’s not even hot right now,” Jason commented with a sneer. “I would like to bring that topic up later, not gonna lie,” he shook his head and returned to his serious gaze. “But this is serious. Like, really serious. I don’t think I can emphasise that enough.”“Well, what is it?” even Matt turned around to look over to him with slight concern. “The homophobia thing. It’s not helpful for Max whatsoever,” he stated the blatantly obvious, which made Matt snort. “No shit sherlock. We covered that ground months ago,” he fought back. Kurtis dug his hands into his pocket, pulling out what it seemed to be the bare remains of Danny’s findings at Max’s house. It looked like he scrunched it up many of times because of frustration, or stomped on it just to put it back into his pocket as evidence for the others. Evidence to support his fucking obvious claim. Matt was the first to pick at it, slowly undoing it and unraveling the brochure suspiciously. He then read through it. Danny could tell exactly when he read all of it. Because it’s the moment his eyes began to shift, sweat began to trickle down his face, and he grew a few shades paler. “What the fuck,” he crushed the paper between his palms and chucked it towards Jason who clumsily caught it. “I didn’t know that it came this far. I didn’t think Max would - no. He couldn’t. He’s smart Kurtis. Unless his parents did. You don’t think his parents know, right?”His words were tumbling over each other, like what his thoughts seemed to be doing. His throat went dry.“B-But we can’t do anything, right?” Jason tried to laugh it off with one of those incredibly painful pockets of laughter. “He knows we’re accepting of him. It’s his family that's super against it.”“Yeah, but I think what Kurtis is saying is that we should approach him about it. Like talk to him and try and sort things out,” Brian tried to approach him calmer. Or he was gobsmacked from the findings and was in a state of shock. A little bit of both probably. “But we’re all gay!” he cried, throwing his arms up into the air frustratingly. “We literally do nothing but support him and yet he’s homophobic. Maybe it’s to do with him not--”
“Stop acting like the fucking victim,”
Matt spat it so venomously that Jason winced. Like a proper wince. Followed by a shiver in pain and instant regret. “You guys always fucking make yourself out to be the victim,” he repeated with less emphasis on the coldness and more on the strong-willed tone. “Fucking enough is enough, we’re handling this shit. We can do something. We just won’t because we always feel like we’re doing enough, but it’s obviously not enough for Max. We’re fucking bullshit friends who don’t give two flying fucks about his mental state. I mean, he can’t stand to be himself for crying out loud! And now he wants to send himself to a torture prison? We didn't do anything up until this point. That’s the biggest problem.”He assembled his things and threw his bag over his shoulder. He stomped away angrily, frustration pulsing out of every step he took as he escaped. He was just plain frustrated. No other way to describe it. It left a wandering Brian, a guilty Kurtis, a shocked Danny and a heartbroken Jason. But the now three of them just sat there in silence for a few moments before Jason began to break down. “What the fuck is going on?!” he howled into his palms. “Literally what the fuck? I don’t even…” he sniffed. “...I don’t know how to deal with any of this bullshit that’s going on right now...I just…”Kurtis wrapped an arm around his shoulder and pulled him in closely.“It’s okay Jason. We’ll sort things out. I have faith in Matt sorting shit out. He always does. It just...takes a while,” he breathed out.“And what about Max?” There was a pause.“We’ll all talk to him,” Danny was the one to fill the void with a reassuring smile and a pat on the back. “Great friends don’t just make up bullshit, you know? I think we all know exactly what to say. We just haven’t thought of a complete plan yet because we’re not there, in the moment, talking to him about it. I already know that everything’s going to wrap together nicely by the end of it.”Jason dabbed at his eyes and lunged towards Danny with open arms. He wrapped him tightly like an action of gratitude.“I wish we didn't handle it like we always do…” he snuggled towards him. “...where we just leave everything and hope for the best...we need to talk about things. Sort this shit out.”“You're right,” Danny sat up right and felt Jason’s arm flop to his sides. The sudden press of his body made him feel like he had accomplished something here. He smiled to himself. “Everything’s going to be fine, I already know it.”“I hope so,” he parted and grinned. “If it doesn't, you owe me a shopping spree to Mac.”Danny chuckled.“But we always go,” he jokingly whined. “Yeah but you’ll still owe me,” he slapped him lightly on the shoulder and smiled wider.“Sure whatever.”
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
“I honest can't believe it Matt,”Max brought the straw of his milkshake to his lips, the colourful pattern of it making this all the more festive. It was a fairly warm afternoon. Max’s usually heavy jumpers were swapped for a lighter grey sweater, and Matt chose to just wear some plain, loose t-shirt with a light jumper on top. This was the definition of spring break for them. Sitting back, talking for hours while they sipped on milkshakes they got at the cafe down the street. Except this time, school was still in and the spot of choice was where they usually sat at lunch; the back overall where no one came. But hey, at least it was a weekend. A weekend at school…maybe it wasn't that ideal. “You actually helped me so much! I would have never expected you to do all that decorating while I was gone,” he was excited. Incredibly excited. That excited Max mode he only got into when Matt remembered his birthday and got him an amazing present, or he got another feature piece in band or something good like that. It wasn’t too often, but whenever he did, Matt’s spirits would be lifted too. “Well, you know. It’s coming up really soon and I didn’t want you to do it all alone,” he slurped his drink nonchalantly.“I didn’t want you to do it alone. But you went ahead and did it anyway,” he rolled his eyes but was quick to laugh it off. “It would’ve taken forever.”“It was no sweat,”
That was a lie.
He had to sneak into school at the earliest time, somehow obeying by his alarm’s screech. He cracked the lock for the hall (luckily remembering all the weirdass tricks Brian M told him about in one of their hangouts), went through the storage closet and raided it out to finish off the decorations. He’d known Max for a lifetime. He knew the way he wanted to decorate it. With light blues and purples to make it dreamlike, with fairy lights and small lanterns decorating the hall. It looked all the more enchanting with the lit up dance floor. It was worth it though, by the end. “I felt bad for not helping out earlier,” it was true. The guilt mixed in with the new revelation that Kurtis pulled out of his ass weighed down on him heavily. “I shouldn't have been so moody to begin with.”Max just smiled warmingly.“It’s okay Matt. I mean, you did all this so...honestly, thanks so much for doing all of this,” he patted him on the shoulder. He does that a lot when he’s truly appreciative. He gets more comfortable around you, enough to shuffle in closer. “I couldn’t have done it without you.”“So do you still need me to do music or…?”“Oh no, I asked Danny to do it,” Matt raised an eyebrow.“Danny? I thought he only listened to punk rock music…” he chuckled a little. “Are you sure you wanna give that job over to him?”“He liked my classical music, so I like to think that he has some sort of musical ability,” he brushed off with a beam. “Doesn't he have to pick pop songs though?”“Nonetheless, I put him onto the task and I believe in him,” they exchanged laughter.“I am really sorry though...I shouldn't have just left like I did,” he shook his head. “I need to stop letting this stupid situation get to my head. I can’t believe I'm letting Jason get to me this much,” he groaned into his hand. “It’s probably because you’re so used to having him around. The sudden change probably isn’t sitting with you too well,” he tried to approach it calmly. “But it shouldn't be that big of a deal. Remember when it was just the two of us?” Well of course Max remembered that. He remembered it like it was yesterday. He wished it was just yesterday. Things were a lot easier back then because it was less people. Less people to worry about. Less people to look after when they found themselves in the stupidest situations. Like crashing the car. It took him forever to individually approach every single parent, give them an apology present, think up a good speech and devise a plan for Kurtis to not get murdered by his family. It was a huge hassle, to say the least.Max sometimes wondered if both of them would be sane if they were to go back and sit as a two.“Look Matt, there’s something I need to tell you,” he suddenly morphed the conversation into a serious one. Matt chuckled.“Sudden change of topic,” he laughed. “N-No it just got me thinking…” he gulped. He took a quick inhale and continued in a rush. “Do you think things were better before we formed this group?”Matt paused.“What do you mean? When it was just the two of us? Maybe Brian, maybe other Brian?” Max nodded. “Well...it was different. Pretty different to what we have now. But not particularly bad, I mean, Jason and I are going through shit but...there’s no doubt that I like him. Danny’s just a sweetheart. I love him to bits. And I like Kurtis when he’s not being a cocky asshole so...I guess I like it the way it is now. Yeah,” he shrugged casually. “Why do you ask?”“Don't you ever think things were easier back then?” he leaned towards him cautiously.“Like school work?” he questioned with confusion.“No. I mean socially. Like friends. Family? Life itself! I don’t freaking know. All that stupid stuff we have to deal with now,” he sort of yelped it in an odd mix of frustration and whining. Matt pursed his lips.“I feel like you're trying to hint at something, but I can't tell what it is,” he confessed. Max took a heavy inhale which completely filled his lungs to the top, and then exhaled slowly until there was little left.“Jason told me...about you know,” he shrugged with no energy. Like his shoulders just slumped back down. “The meth.”He widened his eyes.“T-That’s nothing to get worked up about,” his chortle cracked under his breath. “Honestly, it's just experimenting with shit.”Max leaned in closer to examine his features. He knew him well enough to identify the first few things he does when he’s nervous. His words stumble, he sweats, and then his eyes rush all over the place.“You know crystal meth is incredibly addictive, right?” he gasped. “No wonder you’ve been looking so skinny nowadays. I should've noticed.”Before Matt could back himself up, Max continued further.“Its my fault. I shouldn't have even tolerated you smoking in the first place,” “You didn't tolerate it one bit! It’s obviously my fault,” he tried to reason.“A-And then you started the caps. Oh god, that was a warning sign right there and I didn’t even take it,” he pressed his lips together. “Give me your arm.”“What? I-”“Give me your arm,”He yanked it towards him and pulled up his sleeve. His arms were stained with scratches, blotches of ugly reds running up and down his forearm. His skin was sickly pale with newly painted on sores. “Have you been picking at your arm?” his voice wavered as tears clogged his throat. Matt glanced away.“Tell me. Have you been-?”“Yes! Okay? I have,” he pulled himself back. “I feel like there’s...there’s bugs crawling under my skin,” he stretched out his sleeve. “It’s nothing to worry about.”“I’m so stupid. I’m so dumb for not seeing this,” he bit down on his lip harshly. “The warning signs are all there and I just…” he sniffed. “I missed it all…”Matt felt his heart shatter underneath his skin. Droplets ran down Max’s cheeks in fear as he clutched onto himself, his mind probably pacing as he tried to figure out a solution. But Matt already knew the answer. There was no answer. He knew that there wasn’t going to be some easy solution. This isn’t simple maths anymore. It was complicated shit that no one could really figure out in one sitting.“Max,” he shuffled closer and ran his thumb over his hand. “Please don't get upset,” he sighed. “I’m really sorry for putting you through all this...I’m just-”“I could've done something to stop it…” he mumbled.
That's exactly what I’m thinking with you.
Matt softened his gaze at the thought.“I won't do it anymore, okay? I promise. The meth it’s...getting me down. I’m confused, like, all the time. I’m in the worst mood constantly. I snap at people irregularly. I don't feel like myself anymore,” Max lowered his hand so Matt could grip it tighter. “Its going to be really, really hard. Trust me. But-”“I’m going to help you through everything, okay?” he threw himself towards him with wide arms and a warm embrace. “Absolutely everything.”“But you need to promise me something as well, okay?” The taller boy parted to meet his stare.“Okay. What is it?”This was it. The realisation that Kurtis brought up echoed through his mind. I can’t stuff this shit up. It’s real now. It’s as real as it can get. And Max needs my help.But he feels his throat clog at the thought. After this, they weren’t ever going to be the same again. Everything they talk about and do is going to be so...serious. Be so adult. There seemed to be no time to just chill. Talk. Have some banter and just go on with their days. “You can’t pressure me to stop everything at once, okay?”Fuck. And well, he somehow shifted the topic to himself. Maybe Max didn’t know how fucked up he was too. Or at least he was in denial. Matt would never know. He’s too much of a coward for that.“Yeah but…” he gave a small nod. “Okay. Okay, I’ll try.”“Thank you,” they exchanged smiles.“You’re not...addicted are you? Like fully, fully?”Matt just became one of those painfully obvious guys you see in advertising. What me? No! Never!. Maybe like those 60s ones about homosexuality. Either way, he was lying to himself and Max at this moment. But he gulped down his guilt.“I don’t have an addictive personality, so it’s fine,” he gestured reassurance. Max gave a sigh of relief. “Good. I know you wouldn't get that far but,” he smiled. “I was worried, that's all,” he giggled. “You’ll stop eventually though, right? Like completely?”He shoved on a fake smile“Of course,”
I don't have enough self respect to make myself stop.
“Promise?” he looked towards him and batted his eyes like a little boy who wanted a big present for Christmas.“A double promise? Wow, that’s really pushing it for me,” Max pouted at the response. “But of course yeah. Promise.”“And you’re not lying…?”“Have I ever lied to you?”
I’ve lied to myself about the fact that I’m okay.
“I’m trusting you,” they did that stereotypical thing they do in movies where their pinkies wrap around each other like little girls. “You can always count on me,”
But then again, I've lied to myself about the fact that you're okay.
“Now, why don't we get out of this place. I don't get why we’re even here,” Max laughed, grabbing his hand and hoisting him up. “We can go back to mine. Maybe watch a few movies or something.”Matt beamed.“Like old times?”
Can things be like old times too? Simpler?
“Of course.”
We’re both not okay anymore. And I wish we were.
Matt cursed under his breath on their walk home. He was pretty sure that Max was going on about the musical he was in now, and talking about how exciting it was for him. But Matt was right next to him, stabbing himself in the inside for being a pathetic person who didn’t have the heart to save his best friend from himself.
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
The suit hung over his arms looser than he imagined. It made his shoulders look more broad tough and it did a good job at hiding his pale, lanky arms (that he lowkey liked because it suited his aesthetic). His dark hair was swept back with gel, which he did bother to do an hour before Kurtis picked him up. It amazed him that he did, in the end, but his mom was really exciting to see him in the mood to get ready. He felt...different that night. He stared at himself in the mirror and grinned.He looked a lot more mature like this. Like he was a professional musician who was about to play the piano at the Opera House. “Danny! They’re here,” his mom called for him, and it made him feel like a protagonist for those American high school movies. The typical ones where he would straighten his back, uncrinkle his suit jacket and stretch out his bowtie before he headed out. And then he'd see his hot future boyfriend waiting by the staircase and he would lead him outside where he'd drive them there. And when the perfect moment happened, they'd call out king and queen. And they'd win. And he would look over at him with a surprised smile and they would dance the night away. Roy looked really good in tuxedoes. He would look as amazing as his imagination. Wait. Did he just call himself a female? And Roy--wait. No. Well, the whole gender thing is admittedly getting confusing. Danny doesn't really care about all those labels anymore. He trotted downstairs and watched his mom excitedly rush them in. He never realised how tall Max was until he watched him barely squeeze through their front door. “Hey Danny,” Kurtis was the first to smile towards him, straightening his auburn coloured suit jacket. It was a gradient palette of brown which matched his trousers and hair. It looked pleasantly nice and it made Danny smiled. He looked a lot more confident than he usually did. Maybe it was because he could wear a coolass suit and rock the shiniest shoes. Danny thought Kurtis could rock anything though. “Oh Danny,” Max swooped over to him, tightening his tie so it basically suffocated his neck. “You look amazing. So mature. Sophisticated. Oddly posh.”“T-Thanks,” Danny flushed at the comment.“Okay, okay, I have to take a few pictures and-” and now his mom was being that stereotypical mom who would take pictures before his big night. Now, how much more typical was this going to get? “Mom, stop being so embarrassing,” he blushed further and buried his face into his hands. “Oh, it’s alright Danny,” the tallest boy swung his arm around his shoulder and leaned in closely so their faces would be right next to each other. “I actually love to be in photos,” Kurtis smiled, swooping his arm underneath Danny’s as he posed dramatically. His fingers fanned out by his cheeks and he flicked his leg back like some model. Typical Kurtis.The flash blinded his eyes as he forced out a smile through all that piling embarrassment. It made him feel like the “baby of the group”, even more so than originally.“Don’t be out too late, okay Danny?” she patted him on the shoulder and waved goodbye to all the boys. “Won’t,” he smiled, trying to sneak his way through her stance so he could chase after Max and Kurtis.“Are you hiding something from me?” she raised an eyebrow and smirked.“Mom,” he rolled his eyes. “I’m not dating them.”“Okay. Okay, just wondering,” she gestured towards the entrance borderline jokingly. “They’re pretty cute though.”“Mom don’t do this,” he rolled his eyes and chuckled as he rushed after them and swung himself into the back seat. Kurtis ran his fingers through his waxed hair, staring at himself in the rear view mirror. Max, on the other hand, was texting on his phone. Danny saw that it was to Matt as he peered over the seat. “Your mom is so cute,” Max commented as he strapped himself in, paying extra attention to the seat belt so it didn’t crease his classic, black suit. He shoved his phone into his pocket and proceeded to smile towards him.“T-Thanks,” Danny snickered. “Anyways, where are the others?”“Matt’s off with the football dicks,” Kurtis stated with slight anger. “Going to the diner, then probably showing up late. Typical.”“And Jason and Brian are off with McCook and his group,” Max said, batting an eye towards Kurtis like he was saying “watch your mouth”. “Anyways, we were planning to have a quick maccas run before we head off. Sound good?” Kurtis smoothed his way onto the road. It was nice and calm, and thank god for that. “Sounds great.”It was a typical and welcoming beginning for the night, which Danny was grateful for. But Courtney was on the other end of the spectrum just next door. How many hours has it been since she started getting ready? 3? 4? Maybe 6? Either way, she was now dusting the apples of her cheeks with a light pink powder. Finally, completing the whole look. “Courtney? You've been in here for so long!” Willam twisted the knob of her bedroom door and thrusted forward. Courtney was sat right in front of her, the skirt of her long, slim-fitting dress tossed over her legs. It was a conservative pastel pink, not too bold or striking, but it complimented her so well. It made her look like a Disney princess. And her blonde locks curled by her shoulders made it all the more picturesque. “Wow,” she blurted out. Courtney beamed. “Do you like it?” She excitedly giggled as Willam approached her. “You look pretty…” she confessed, the statement basically a whisper. “W-What?” She was surprised at the comment, but also admittedly a tad confused because it was so quiet. Willam shook her head. “I said you look shitty,” she laughed at her own joke as she placed her hands onto Courtney’s shoulders. “I know what you really said,” the blonde gave a coy smile. “What are you trying to accomplish here?” She questioned her sarcastically. “A compliment from a very beautiful friend of mine,” she widened her grin. “Yeah good on ya, trying to get into my good books by giving me a compliment,” she twirled a strand of her hair with her index finger. “Well I'm going to tell you now that I have guys giving me compliments and money. How are you gonna top that Miss Act?”“With my raw talent,” it made her friend roll her eyes. “Nice try,” she laughed, tucking one hand behind her back. “Now. I have a little present for you, but I don't know if you're gonna like it."Courtney raised an eyebrow and gestured for her to come closer. Willam chuckled and took a step over to her, hovering by her side with a smug look on her face."I like presents," she smiled dumbly, making Willam cackle.Giving in, she brought it in front of her, the box neatly wrapped on top of her palm. Courtney tipped her head to the side in confusion."What is it?" she looked down at it with a faint smile by her lips. "It's what Dan should have gotten you," she slurred the name with slight distaste. She took the end of the ribbon and yanked it undone. Inside was a baby pink cascade of flowers, all tightly stitched together so it bloomed outwards like freshly picked roses. Courtney gasped. It was the corsage of her dreams."They look amazing!" she squealed, clasping her hands together. "It matches my dress," she pressed her lips together and gazed up at her. Willam looked more gorgeous from this angle. The edges of her cheekbones and jaw were more defined, her blue eyes shined so brightly under her bedroom light, and her lips were perfectly lined with a perky nude. "...thank you.""No worries," she snorted. "It wasn't my job though. Maybe your boyfriend should've done the right thing.""I-It's okay. I didn't exactly expect anything so..." she forced on a smile. "It means so much to me...that you actually got it," they exchanged thankful smiles. "Maybe you should be my date instead."Courtney bit down on her lip. Was it a risky question? In her mind it was. But Willam was so quick to brush it off, it almost hurt her a little."I don't believe in relationships," she winked jokingly. "Unless it involves money."She piped out another chuckle, this one was much more stiff and cold though.But she was truely thankful for this. How long had it been now? Around 2 years since her and Dan started going out? Either way, it wasn't exactly pleasant all the time. And it seemed like Willam and Alaska had to somehow patch it up for him all the time. Just so Courtney didn't release her all the rage she had stored up in her little, always-bikini-ready body of hers. But he was nice. A tad forgetful, but kind. And good looking, or at least, that’s what everyone said. Courtney didn’t even know if she found him that hot half the time. She couldn't really...tell…? If that made sense to anyone. “And of course I got one for you. I'm not that much of a bitch. Anyway,” she grabbed onto Courtney’s hand, gently placing it on top of hers. The head cheerleader could feel her eyes dilate. Willam smoothed it down her wrist, the sensation, though stereotypical, sending sparks of excitement through her body. “There you go," she took a step back to let it all sink it. "It looks so great.”Courtney smiled and carrsessed it within her fingers. “It's so amazing…” she felt whimsically gracious. The petals felt waxy and soothing through her nails. “See, Alaska said that the white would match the undertones of your skin more, but I convinced her that this was the right one. You agree, right?” Willam looked towards her with a confident gaze. Courtney nodded. “See? Oh god, I'm great.”She dragged out her words with a husky chuckle. “Okay, you ready to go?” She stood up, rocking her weight onto the balls of her feet. Her heels were ever so high and the crystallised pattern made a clicking noise as she walked but it made her feel more like a princess. When she escaped her bedroom and saw Dan by the bottom of the staircase, she knew instantly that something was wrong. Her stomach churned at the thought. But everything was supposed to be...right. Stereotypical. Picturesque. Everything beneath her was. Everything was playing out like the movies, but it didn't make her feel like she was apart of one. She was draped in a beautiful, pink dress. One that no one could really afford. She wore heels that made her look like a million bucks. Her face was carved precisely. And there was her boyfriend, the one final touch, looking perfectly chiseled and handsome with his traditional, black suit. And yet. It seemed all wrong. Willam had let go of her hand by then, making her way down the stairs and into the other room where Alaska probably was. Courtney could imagine Alaska doing up her heels, brushing down her skirt that fanned out just enough to compliment her sharply toned legs and fetching her phone to take pictures of the perfect couple. She was basically a mom after all. “You look amazing,” he breathed with awe, wrapping his arms around her to reel her in.“Thank you…” She smiled gently. She could feel her cheeks cool against his shirt. Her grin seemed to always fall weak against camera flashes. Or at least, it did in this moment. Where her arms felt limp and her legs felt like giving up already. She couldn't quite put her finger on it, but she didn't feel like herself. Or maybe, the self she really wanted to be.
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
It was well into the night but Jason was still nowhere to be seen. Which was sort of a shame because one, Danny was missing him. And two, Matt looked hot as fuck. With his slick, black suit and gelled back hair, he looked breathtakingly handsome. Ah, fuck this shit. Thank god for Jason not being able to read his thoughts. But seriously, he was missing out. Max seemed to be having a nice time too, dancing around joyfully with the two Brians. Danny liked this side of Max. It made him look more...natural. Instead of that super mature, posh sort of vibe he had going on most of the time. And though Danny liked that part of him usually, it was nice to see another side of him. It reminded him that they were around the same age. “Wait, where's Kurtis?” Max asked, his eyes scanning the room. “Umm…”And then for a split second, the room grew silent. very suddenly. Just as the song switched, everyone stopped talking and it seemed like the whole world stood still. And it was in that moment, when Danny and Max had found Kurtis. But there was no Jason in sight. No. They wished.It was Violet, standing right next to him, their arms linked and heads raised high. They strutted down the parted crowd like celebrities at a red carpet. Everyone's eyes were glued on the couple like hawks. But they didn't mind. Not at that all. They seemed to absolutely love all the attention. By the time the music switched back on, the loud chattering from before was swapped out with empty mutters. Ones that made Danny and Max nervous now that they were approaching them, with smug smiles on their lips and a cocky stance. “Did you know that this was happening?” Max mumbled over, his eyes still stuck onto them. Danny could only reply with a stiff shake of the head. “Honestly, I didn't plan on coming this late,” were Violet’s first words. It was accompanied with a chortle and it made her sound more cocky. Like her stance wasn't enough. “Vi was telling me that it took forever to do her eye makeup,” Kurtis stated, his voice laced with some sort of posh accent as well.Their presence reminded Danny of a rich, successful power couple. Ones that made millions overnight and owned a giant mansion, where they held amazing parties underneath their crystalised chandelier and had ice sculptures decorating the hall. They would sip martinis and watch the sunset, and Violet would have a large diamond on top of her engagement ring that matched the necklace Kurtis got for her on her birthday.Danny got a little carried away with that description.“B-But it looks amazing,” Max plastered on a smile and gestured awkwardly. If this was his attempt at warming up to whatever the fuck was happening, though it was sort of a failed one, Danny couldn’t help but to think that it was nice and kind of cute. “You honestly look so gorgeous...J-Jason..?”“I’d rather be called Violet. Violet Chachki,” she took out her hand and fanned it downwards in front of him. Max examined it oddly before awkwardly taking it. Pecking it ever so lightly, it made Violet beam. What a gentlemen.“Cute,” Kurtis jabbed gingerly. Max gave him a deadpan expression as he glanced away.“Topic change for a second, when are they gonna announce king and queen?” Kurtis asked. Danny imagined Violet to start thinking of Matt sometime soon. He thought that they had an unsaid pledge to never talk about relationships while their relationship was on...hiatus? But it did seem like a Kurtis thing to do. You know, say something inappropriate at the wrong time. “Uh…” Max glanced down at his watch. “Now. If it goes according to schedule.”“Who’s nominated?” Kurtis seemed a little disinterested, but fair enough. The nominees weren’t people you wouldn’t expect.“Court, Will, ‘Lasky,” Danny shrugged. “What most people expect.”“Oooh, Danny has nicknames for them. Are they your besties?” Violet laughed. Danny rolled his eyes.“I’ve hung with them a few times. I don’t think Willam remembers me at all. Maybe even Alaska but she would be nicer about it,” he chuckled. “Courtney and I are actually friends. Good friends.”
Or that’s what I’d like to think.
"Oh yeah, you guys are neighbours...?" Violet asked. Danny nodded. "Cute."Surprisingly, the rest of the night was filled with small chat like this too. It was a little...stiffer than he would have wanted. It was a tad more awkward than he imagined this night would be. He was admittedly a little excited, but this wasn't at all what he hoped for. It was when a microphone's screech echoed throughout the room when it went silent between them and it somehow eliminated that awkward feel. This is where Danny zoned out. It was like his mind was programmed to stop paying attention at this moment. It’s because nothing out of the ordinary occurs in places like this. In situations like this. It’s too typical at this point. And yeah, Courtney does look amazing on stage. Just like he imagined. Actually, maybe even more than he imagined. She did look like a princess. But still. It was kind of boring. And of course the principal announced Dan as the king. He already is the king of the school, and now there’s an actual title that dubbed him as one. Great. Everyone was so excited about that.And he probably said some speech, but Danny stopped listening to that too. He's not that great at talking anyway, there was no point. But after, his mind instantly darted over to Courtney, who he was waiting to see get crowned. He was actually a little excited for this. And then there was that pause for the queen. Courtney clasped her hands with Willam, then with Alaska as they excitedly wait for one of their names to be called. There was an obvious choice, but it wouldn’t have been out of the ordinary for any of them to win, really. They all...deserved it? Wait. What’s the title actually for? No one really knew. Was it for the most well rounded...?All Danny knew was that Courtney was the ultimate front runner, and he was ready for his childhood friend to win already. And the crown would look so good with her whole outfit. It would complete her high school story, and the way she smiles when she’s absolutely full of joy is undeniably adorable and Danny loves that. “And the queen is…”
Just call out her name. Just say Courtney already.
There’s another pause, this time, much more stale and awkward.“V-Violet? Violet Chachki…?”Violet felt her hands tremble. They all looked over at her, stares frozen with confusion, surprise and shock. She felt Kurtis loosen his grip on her arm, as if he was guiding her towards the stage. The blaring lights glared down at her, making her squint. At least it made her partially blind so she didn’t have to face the audience properly, she thought, as she slowly made her way towards the stage. The clicking of her heels echoed throughout the deadly silent room. It felt both dull and striking at once. The crowd parted like there was some magical force around her. Like there was some 5m radius that prevented anyone from coming close to her. And she liked it that way. It looked even more ridiculous when she stood up there, with everyone looking miniature and insignificant from the stage. Except the smiles, of course, which she was quick to spot from stage. It glistened through the empty crowd somehow. Danny had the most excited smile, the colour of awe already melting away to reveal his toothy grin underneath. Even Max seemed partially excited, his amusement just piercing through, enough for his eyes to widen but then stretch out again with his grin. And Kurtis gave him a confident nod and a thumbs up, reassuring her that everything was going to be okay. And it felt like it. Even with Matt’s horrified expression which made regret pool in his stomach. The principal seemed to nudge her towards the mic, even with an expression of absolute disregard. It stung her fingers with icy coldness.Now, she had to make this perfect. The whole school was about to hear her voice for the first time. And so, she firstly smiled. A gentle smile which she just managed to muster up through the pounding pain of her schoolmates who still somehow looked down at her even though she was standing so much higher.And then she chuckled. It was a light chuckle, but it was just enough to catch everyone's attention. Somehow even more than at that moment. “Look, I’ve seen this on Glee before,” her voice was perky and joking, which sweetened the mood for her. Maybe just for her, but she liked it that way. “And to be honest, the crowd looks exactly the same as it did on that guilty pleasure show. You all look so shocked. So bewildered at the situation, and trust me, me too. But I know that some of you may find this entertaining. Really funny. Like this is some creative masterplan you decided to think up last minute, when I walked in here. And you know what I’ve got to say for that?” she took a deep inhale. What she wanted to say was on the tip of her tongue, but there was a force holding her back. She knew that if she was to say it, the world was going to come down at her like a hurricane. But fuck that shit. She didn’t give a fuck anymore.“You’re all so pathetic,” The gasps fueled her ego. Like the tension was just lifting her spirits. “The fact that you tried to humiliate me by making me stand up here in my unclockable mug and beautiful dress, is first of all, funny to me. Because, I mean, I obviously look better than everyone up here,” she flicked her head back, her hair flipping over her shoulder dramatically. Slender arms, chiseled out features and long, dark hair; she looked like a model. “Sorry about it,” she spat it jarringly yet smoothly. “Second of all. Humiliation? Really? The only humiliating thing is this “clever” plan of yours. FYI if you haven’t realised, it’s not clever. It’s not smart. It’s the furthest thing from anything intelligent. You just stole a plot point from a mildly popular series and it’s actually pathetic and downright laughable,” she oozed confidence when she’s on stage.“Almost like what you’re all wearing tonight,” there’s another wisp of gasps, followed by mutters. “Now I don’t know who exactly put this whole thing together, and I’m guessing that it’s quite a large group,” she batted an eye towards Dan who gulped and shuffled into a darker lit area of the stage.“But whoever you people are,” she took the end of her crown and raised it into the air.“Suck it. Because now, your miserable girlfriends who really wanted this $10 crown can’t have it. So I guess miss popular ultimately loses to a faggot who has more talent than you,” she laughed.“Sorry for my language,” she snorted cockily.“Oh and for anyone who’s wondering,” she flicked it, the long nails tapping the edge of the crown.“It’s most definitely plastic. Thanks.”She was quick to hop off the stage and strut back to her friends, the crowd parting away from her as she walked. It made her look like a queen. And she was, for all her friends. There was an uncomfortable silence for a moment before the music came back on, when the audience merged together again to circle around her. No one asked direct questions to her, but she liked it that way. She liked how everyone just stared but didn't communicate with her whatsoever. That made her sound like a bitch, but that wasn’t wrong. “Violet,” Kurtis started. “...I’m so proud of you!” they embraced each other quickly and jumped in joy. “You were amazing! You looked great up there, the speech was fucking genius and argh,” he beamed. “You are just perfect.”“Jason, I mean Violet,” Max warned him with a strong gaze. “I feel like something bad’s gonna happen because of this.”“Eh, they can fucking suck it,” he shrugged. “I don’t care.”“But-”He seemed genuinely worried. What she did up there was...bold. To say the least. “This is probably my favourite moment of the year,” Danny laughed. “That was fucking great. You’re my idol.”“Aw, Danny,” she towered over him as they shared a hug. It was odd for Danny to feel her body pressed up against him like this. She was so...tall. Like a model. Most notably, a 1960s model, from the way her hair was styled. “Okay, okay. You know what would make this night even better though?” she took him by the hand, and also grabbed Kurtis’s. Smugly smiling at all of them, she snickered. “If you all dance with me.”They all exchanged laughter before they squeal like little girls and dance like teenage fools. That was the moment Danny felt happy. Completely happy. That really satisfying happy where it felt like nothing could get better. Time should have just frozen right then and there so he would be eternally happy. Because it was so picture perfect that he couldn’t get a grin off his face.That label of “Sad Boy” disintegrated, right then and there, and he felt it fall through his fingers like sand as it pooled by his feet. It was gone. All that torment seemed to just...vanish. Right then.Danny smiled. Smiled properly for the first time in his life.They're immortal. They're perfect.
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
For Violet, every punch, every kick and heck, even every grunt, felt familiar. The same as before. It felt sort of...nostalgic. In the most fucked up way possible. Jason howled in pain through Violet’s thick skin as her body curled over. She whimpered.She was sure that she did the right thing tonight; standing up in front of everyone and announcing that she was on top and deserved respect, but he doesn't know anymore.Blood always tasted oddly salty. Like tears but thicker and richer. She could feel her skin retreat as her body pulsed. They say to only give what you can take, and well, now she regretted it all. She realised right then and there, that she can’t take it. She just can’t take what she gives. She regretted standing up there, she regretted saying a dumb speech, and she really regretted showing up.It was dumb for her to stand-out in this school of hers. Alone too. Because she knew something bad was going to happen, and she was warned. But after the dance, she decided to stand alone in the hallway, arms crossed over her chest with a confident smile. She wasn’t alone, at one point. But the crowd seemed to dwindle. Max left to check up on the cleaning, since he was the organizer. Danny rushed off to check up on Courtney, because of course queen bee needs a checkup to see if she’s mentally stable after losing for the first time. And Kurtis rushed off to the bathroom quickly before he drove them home. It was dumb of him to stay out here alone to let Violet suffer. He should've known better.The fist by her cheek was dangerously sweaty. She never saw herself as a victim as much as she did then. Verbally, she could hurl it back with more force. Emotionally, she could take it. Mentally, she could handle it. But physically, she couldn’t. She couldn’t just swallow it up like the rest.
“Jason,”
A light suddenly pierced through the crowd like a blade, cutting apart the ambush around her. She squinted. A hand grabbed her own, yanking her through, what looked like, the opening to heaven. She grasped onto them, quickly gaining balance onto the tips of her feet before she ran. Her feet trotted beneath her rigidly, like they were on the verse of collapsing on top of each other, but she continued to run. She watched as the group, who was previously on top of her, yell and point at her escape. But they didn’t chase her. There was no use. She was already broken. With a sharp turn of a corner and a kick, she was in an isolated science lab, the lights off and now, the door closed. It was a darkly lit room, with the windows just cracking in a few beams of light. There was pure silence for a moment.“Matt…?” the inner Jason was crying his name, his bottom lip quivering like his legs.“I’m so sorry,”In one gulp of air, he slumped his arms around her neck and pulled her into a tight embrace. Violet was a little taken aback. “I’m so sorry for all of this. I’m an idiot. A complete idiot,” he was practically falling on top of her frail body.“Matt…” she whispered.“I was being a dick and, and, I shouldn't have left you. I shouldn't have left you all those times--”“Matt,” she repeated, pulling him in closer. “It’s okay…” she breathed out, the words feeling heavier in her throat than she expected. “I’m just glad you’re here again. With me.”“Like I should be,” he smiled into her neck. “I’m never, ever leaving you again. Got that?”She parted from the embrace to sit down by a desk. Patting the empty spot next to him, she gladly took the offer and sat down. “I tried looking for a first aid kit but--”“Couldn’t find one,” she finished. “I know. Max said they needed to gather them up and store it at the hall just in case something went wrong. No one really thought something dangerous would happen outside.”Matt paused.“I want to get back at them,”It was a simple statement, but it made Violet’s heartbeat ring in her ears.“I want to see them suffer. Because you’re my absolute world and I can’t believe they’d treat you like that,” he shook his head in disbelief. He knew it was bad but...not this bad. “If I kill them, you better not dob me in,” he grinned lightly as he let out a husky chuckle. It was a true smile which formed within Violet.“Well first of all, you can’t get away with it,” she reasoned playfully.“True,”“Second of all, you’ll get kicked off the football team which would forever ruin your relationship with your dad and--”“I quit,” he shrugged. Violet flinched at the statement.“You, what?” she scoffed, denying the claim.“I quit,” he repeated, just as calm and nonchalant as before. “I’m not that great.”“You scored the winning goal in so many games!” “Did you know I failed 7th Grade PE?” he snickered.“Of course I know that,” she sighed. “I was in your class,” she reminisced that moment. He looked really young. A little rounded face. Bright blue eyes. Pouty lips. He had a baby face for so long. “You got knocked out with a soccer ball to your head because Willam was pissed off at some guy who laughed at Courtney for failing to kick a ball.”“I wonder who that dick was…” he guiltily glanced away. “Your dad’s literally going to kill you. You know that right?” she said a tad firmer. “Eh, it’ll be fine. I’ll tell him that I’m focusing on studies more, or like, it’s damaging my body or something like that,” he shrugged. “There’s so many more important things I could be doing other than football. Like hanging out with decent people that I actually like,” he nudged her lightly. “Or being with someone I care about deeply that I should have looked out for more,” she grinned through her blush. “I’m sorry.”“I’m sorry too,” he reeled her in closely and she swore her heart skipped a beat, no matter how stereotypical and cliche it that was to say that. It was like the world was restored for a split second as she felt her chest warm up. “I missed you.”“I missed you too,” he felt her head fall onto his shoulder. “Do you remember when I asked you out?”“Of course I fucking do,” she snorted. “Why wouldn't I?”“Okay, tell me about it,” he snaked his arm towards her nipped in chest and pulled her into a familiar and comfortable position. She chuckled.“Well, it was a Thursday,” she began, pondering at the fairly clear picture in her mind.“Yeah?”“And I said I craved ice cream. So you ditched fifth period with me so we could get some,” she smiled.“Yeah, and?”“You somehow guessed my favourite flavour, which is Rocky Road,” “Got that information from Kurtis. Go on,” “And when I wasn’t looking, you put a small letter in the corner and it said--”“If you stop being such a tease, I’d ask you out properly,” he finished for her, both cackling at the gesture.And Jason did remember that card very vividly. He still had it in his room. It was sticky taped to the wall by his desk so he could stare up at it. The corner is stained with ice cream, but it still had so much sentimental value to it. It was square, a little uneven from the scissors but even enough, and it was made of cardboard. The writing was obviously his, and even with his attempts at being neat, it was still a little rough. But it told so many stories for him. Jason loved it. Pastel markers and cursive writing didn’t really fit Matt all that much but it was so charming that Jason couldn’t help but to fall in love with it. “Yeah,” she bit down on her lip, hard, to contain her smile. “And I said--”“I want to ride your face,” Matt smirked. Violet sneered.“That’s not what happened,” she rolled her eyes.“Eh, that’s basically what happened,” he shrugged. “That’s what ended up happening that night.”“And it was great,” she beamed, stretching out her smile widely. Matt sighed and gave her a light chaste kiss. “And to celebrate a year and a half’s worth of amazing memories,” he tucked his hand into his pocket and pulled out a small present. It was wrapped tightly with a cute little bow on the top. “It’s rocky road. Actual rocky road.”Violet gasped.“Oh my god,” she felt her heart melt. “I can’t believe it!”“I can’t believe it either,” he rubbed the back of his head. “Apparently it’s an Australian thing...? Courtney taught me how to make it the other day after endless rants from Dan saying that I was trying to fuck her. I wasn't, by the way. And I managed to whip up some for you. It might not be that great but--”“I love it,” she took it into her hands. “Aw, the bow’s even violet.”“You haven't even tried it. How do you know you like it?” he hopped off the desk.“I like anything you give me,” “That was cliche,”“I’m the queen of cliches,”“I like to think you’re just a queen. In general,” he grinned cheesily. "And how do I look tonight?" she thinned out her eyes and posed dramatically, quickly dissolving into laughter."You look like you rule the world," He suddenly shot out his fingers like a gun, flashing a cardboard card between them. He raised his eyebrows flirtatiously, but jokingly, as Violet clapped her hands and tilted her head back to pipe out a laugh. “And what’s this?” she asked, accepting the card.
Do you want to be with me forever?
A) yesB) AC)forever and ever until I die
“I don’t have a pen on me,” she chuckled. “But I’d check all of them.”Matt gave a light chuckle. “Good,"Matt held out his hand like a typical gentleman, waiting for her response. She was quick to place her hand on top, every so lightly, so he could guide her outside, her long, long fingertips brushing against his palm gently.You know, Matt wasn’t as dumb as everyone made him out to be. He was creatively smart. He had stirred up a plan that was so sweet and charming, and just creative enough that it made Violet pulse with happiness. She was so...happy. Plain and simple. She couldn’t be any happier than this.He chose the perfect room, where there was a small verandah like opening by another door. It was probably to do experiments outside, like when chemistry gets a little too messy, but it still felt perfect. She placed a hand by his shoulder, he placed one by her waist and she felt the tips of her feet give out. Give out into a non-existent tune that they both happily followed. Matt raised his arm and twirled her in a single motion, her skirt fanning out like a blooming flower. She nipped it between her fingers, laughing as Matt kissed her on the cheek.“You’re cute when you’re smiling like that,” he grinned.“And when I’m not?”“You’re smoking hot,”Violet cackled as a response. How much more amazing could this couple be? “You know what…” she entwined her fingers behind his neck. “Even though this is the absolute sweetest gesture in the world and nothing could top this; with grand gestures or not, I still love you. Even all the small moments we have together.”“Me too,” You know, it felt like a romance movie right then and there. Where the camera pans out after a romantic kiss under the moonlight and a serene song plays that wraps everything up. And he’s holding her ever so tightly so she’d never slip through his fingertips. And she’s falling into his embrace like sleep so she’d never have to wake up.They were in their own movie. And it was perfect.
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Danny’s suit stuck to him like super glue. Lucky it was black because there were sweat patches everywhere but it just wasn't too noticeable. He lost track of time ages ago and it seemed like he took the same route every single time as he ran around the corridors. He just continued to run through the halls until he eventually found her. And there she was. Her hands covering her face, her back hunched over, and her knees bent towards her chest. And she was crying. Crying into her lap until she looked like she was going to dry out.“Court!” Danny rushed over to her, slipping onto his knees swiftly in the process. “Court, oh my god, are you okay?”She glanced up at him, her blue eyes stained red and her lips cracked. When Danny said she looked good in everything, maybe he was wrong. She didn’t look great like this. She looked...broken. Like there was an ever growing crack within her chest. All the bold colours from before were smudged together to create swirls of muck on her face. “Oh Court,” he grabbed her hand softly, trying to encourage her to get up. “Why don’t we get you cleaned up and-?” “Just stop it Danny,” she snatched back her hand. Jolting against the wall, she shook her head and glanced down.“I don’t want your help. Can you get Willam or Alaska?”The old Danny would have said yes. He would’ve done anything to make Courtney feel better, but this Danny holted. He sat back down, one knee bent as he stared at her. His eyes were locked onto her, even though she refused to look back.“Why? Why can’t I help?” he asked, leaning his index finger against her forearm. She flinched.“Quit it Danny,” she fought back.“What can they do that I can’t? I care about you just as much and I don’t appreciate you just pushing me aside like some-”“Why did you let Jason do that...?” she whimpered under her breath.“What?” he edged closer to view her face.“Why did you let Jason do that?!” she screamed, scattering away from his stance. “He’s your friend! Why did you let him just humiliate me like that in front of everyone!”“I had nothing to do with it! I didn’t even know he was going to do that until he walked in!” he argued, taking the offence personally.“That was my big moment and he fucking ruined it!” the younger boy was quite taken back by her exclaim.“Stop whining about it Courtney it was just a fucking crown. I could get you one for your birthday if you really want,”“It’s about the title Danny! Everyone hypes it up like crazy and it ruins my image,”“So you finally get a small glimpse at what my life is like,” There was a pause.“Not just my life. Everyone. Everyone but yours. You can go ahead and complain about not getting the crown, but you know that every other person doesn't get one either, right? Just one person. And at least you got nominated! That’s hell of a lot better than everyone else. You, Willam and Alaska are all living the fucking life. Why can’t you just recognise that?”Courtney replied with a sniff. Burying her head into her arm, she choked out a cough. Danny’s heart began to beat slower, enough for the blood to stop rushing to his head so he could breath.“Courtney...I’m sorry…” he muttered, trying to gain her attention. Or at least the recognition that he existed. “I didn’t mean to shout at you…”“I-I don’t get it…” she gulped a quick inhale. “...I’ve done everything right. I’ve done exactly what god intended me to do but I still don’t get the happy ending I want. I’ve been praying every night. I go to church every Sunday. I have a nuclear family. A-And not even that...I'm also the perfect example of what society wants! I have the most perfect family, w-with a boyfriend who’s the quarterback and I’m head cheerleader,” she snapped her attention towards Danny. “They make movies about me. About people exactly like me and it never ends like this. They end up happy because that's what it's supposed to be like.”She spat. Danny described her tone to be like babyish. Like a whine. Like she was complaining so much about first world problems and he couldn't wrap his head around it. How could she be unhappy? Because one thing went wrong? Everything goes wrong for him all the time. But he didn’t say that. He gulped heavily and nodded to himself.“I’m just going to get Willam and Alaska. They’d probably know your situation more than I’d ever get,” he simply helped her up and got out his phone, finding their contacts to shoot them a small message. “But I want you to know something before I go. You’re being a bitch Courtney.”The words stung his tongue, as much as it hurt her to hear it. “You’re being a complete bitch Courtney. Life is supposed to be hard. And sadly, you can't always get what you want. Like a stupid crown and a stupid title.”“Okay, okay, break it up,”Roy took a large step to intrude the two, pressing his palm against their shoulders to rip them apart. They both stumbled back. The older boy could instantly feel the tension the moment he stepped foot into the little bubble of theirs.“We need to all calm down,” he sounded like an everyday therapist that barely scratched the surface of minimum wage but he couldn’t help it. He didn’t know what else to say. “Court, you look really hurt. Are you okay?”She didn’t reply with anything direct. She just nodded and her eyes darted back to the ground. Silence washed over them. It must have been the first time it was like this. Where it was just...quiet. And nothing was going on. No words, no nothing. Just Roy’s look of confusion, but not like either of them replied. Both Danny and Courtney refused to give him any reply or confirmation of what was going on.
“Courtney!”
Thank god for Willam and Alaska dashing over to them, looking like they were on the verge of running over their long dresses. Willam had her heels in one hand, the other was holding up her ever-so-long skirt. Alaska seemed to be trotting over to her speedily. They looked like the bestest friends Courtney could ask for in that moment.As the blonde was whisked away into her friend’s grasps, Roy and Danny simultaneously took a sigh of relief.“She needs to be with her people for a while, don’t you think?” Before he knew it, he was sat down at his usual lunch spot. It was supposed to be cold and damp outside, but he found it instead, refreshing. At this moment at least. After he flared up and felt his blood literally boil.It was a magnificent view. The sky was perfectly cloaked with black, no clouds in sight, and the stars were visible specks sprayed across like splashed paint. The moon was complete. There were no rough edges...like Danny. He looked down.Roy was sat next to him, his legs crossed and his palms placed behind him to support his weight. He looked relaxed as he stared over the grassy field.“What you said earlier…” Danny began. “Her people…”“Yeah, anyone who’s popular now, right?” he snickered.“...when did we stop being her people?” he rested his chin against his bent knees. “Maybe around middle school…?” he pondered. “Maybe high school. Middle school was bearable, right?” he chuckled, but it came off airy and a little painful. “We still hung out a lot. Went to the mall, went to see movies, we hung out on the weekends, but…” he trailed off. “...high school’s a little different. We all drifted apart, I think.”“I didn’t want us to,” he admitted, pursing his lips.“You sound like a little kid,” he joked.“B-But I didn’t want us to. I don’t want us to,” he whined, though he helplessly tried to sound more masculine. “It was so great. I don't understand what went wrong.”“People change, they drift apart Danny. It’s just what happens,” he shrugged nonchalantly. “And we spend less and time together because we have different classes, different friends...we're in different grades. But don’t feel like we don’t like you anymore because you’re a year younger. We still love you Danny.”
Not in the way I want you to.
“But I want it to be so much simpler, like it used to be,” he flopped back, his head landing on a soft patch of grass. It intertwined within his hair, cooling his mind. “When Courtney wasn’t so popular?” he tried to laugh it off, but he seemed a little hurt about. They seemed to have an unwritten pledge to not talk about how Roy was feeling about it all. Or the older boy didn’t want to talk about it at all, which seemed to be it. He wasn't the type to talk about his feelings all the time. As in ever. “She seems to really like it though. And...I think I was wrong about Willam,” he jerked his eyebrows and inhaled. “Or at least, I don't think she’s some huge threat like I used to think. She looks like she cares about her a lot. And I guess I can accept anyone who cares about Courtney that much,” he exhaled deeply. “It’s nice to know that other people care about her as much as we do.”“...but it’s sort of hard to swallow that. I don’t know,” he slumped down his shoulders. “I think it’s still hard for me to comprehend the fact that things move on. You’re gonna all graduate soon and...I guess I will too eventually. And it's all going too quickly,” he bit down on his lip. "I still want to go back to the times where we just hung out at the park and played around on the playground. Or the times we watched crappy Christmas movies during December because Courtney loved them. Or all those times we put on the radio and started singing along because, once upon a time, we used to all listen to pop music. And..." he closed his eyes. "I don't think I'm ready to let that all go."“Not ready to grow up?” He asked, his voice a tad sweet. “Yeah, I guess not,” he blew a raspberry to calm his nerves. “I wanna be young forever!”He exclaimed childishly, receiving an entertained laugh from Roy. Flapping his arms to his sides, he batted his legs up and down to release all the tension building up within his chest. “I get it Danny. The future scares me too, admittedly," his confession was let out huskily. "It's coming so close and...I don't know where I'm going too. It seems so late to think about it like that, but I can't help but to think it's true. I wish you could go back and forth in age because that way, I can relive so many amazing moments we had together, while also experiencing new ones," he briefly reminisced a few of those moments in his mind, like a quick recap. But to him, it felt like a lifetime of stories. "You haven’t changed at all Danny,” he shook his head and pinched his nose. “Not that I mind though.”Danny flushed, just light enough to go unnoticed in the dark. “And you haven’t changed at all either,” he grinned back, but the older boy seemed much too distracted by the night sky. And yeah, it did look amazing from where they sat. Danny couldn’t blame him. But he couldn’t exactly peel away his eyes to view the sky.He was much too distracted by Roy. And the way he looked when he felt calm and relaxed. And the way his hair blew in the light zephyr. And the way his eyes squinted, just a tad, as he inhaled deeply and let out a sigh. “...and I like that too…”“Well,” He quickly wiped his hands against his suit jacket and hopped up. “We should head back inside. It’s gonna get cold.”“But I like it out here!” He cried, continuing his honeyed tone. Roy chuckled again, holding out a hand for him to take. “You’re gonna get a cold,” he reasoned again, Danny eventually losing to the power of Roy’s persuasion. Which was really, just that small twinkle in his eyes and his dimples. That alone would convince a whole crowd of people to convert into Mormonism. “Fine,” he pouted, taking his hand so he could yank him up in one swooping motion. As Danny stumbled for balance onto his feet, he found himself standing a tad too close to Roy. So close that his breath was practically scratching at his neck. He widened his eyes and quickly rushed apart. “Thanks for talking to me, I guess.”He shoved his hands into his pocket and cleared his throat. “You look like a prepubescent child when you do that,” He roughed up his hair a bit before cheekily grinning. “But you don’t mind...right?” a small smile creeped onto his lips. “Not at all.”
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“Oh Court,” The paper towels soaked in cold water iced her skin as she dabbed at her under eyes. They looked so sunken in. So much more than she’d hoped for. “We’ve been looking for you everywhere,” Alaska took out Courtney's tied up hair and brushed out her locks, the curls from before dying down into little waves. “You look so miserable.” Placing down the brush, she grabbed the wet paper towel once again to circle around her cheeks and wipe away more excess mascara and eyeliner.“I look like I’m genuinely melting,” Courtney pursed her lips, letting Alaska wipe away the barely existing lipstick stain. “We should head home then. My place is free. We can burn some wood in the fireplace and get those fleece blankets out so we don’t get cold,” she reassured, pulling the warmest smile she could manage before rubbing the blonde’s shoulders. “But what about the after party?” Willam had her back against the wall, looking over to them with a borderline bored expression. Alaska crinkled her brows. “How could you think about a stupid party right now?” She snapped, gesturing towards Courtney. “Can’t you see her state right now?”“You mean her overreaction?” Alaska scoffed at the comment and rolled her eyes. “Look, when Danny texted us that there was an emergency, I thought something was genuinely wrong. I should’ve known that you were just crying over your loss.”“Don’t do this now Will,” she warned, her voice a little wary. “No, I am doing this now. Reality check, we all lost today. Except Jason, or Violet or whatever. But really, he’s not winning either because he just got humiliated in front of the whole school,” she stepped past Alaska, dismissing her stance, and walked up to Courtney, taking both hands into her own. “Court, look at yourself. Your mascara is running, your lipstick is smudged and you’re about to ruin the dress you spent too much money on. And it’s over a stupid crown,” Courtney glanced down. “But it’s about—““But it’s about the title. I know. I figured. And it’ll look great with your dress and do amazing things for you reputation,” her words were laced with heavy sarcasm. “If you really think that you’ll receive supreme power over this school or something, you’re an idiot.”“Will,” Alaska shot a cold look towards her. Willam already had two strikes against her name. “You are a fucking idiot. People already part like the Red Sea when they see you. You strut down the halls like it’s nobody’s business, and you dominate this fucking school like a queen. Why are you whining and carrying on like a bratty bitch when you already have everything?” She took one last exhale and looked at her straight in the eyes. Courtney tightened the grip of their intertwined fingers. “I’m guessing, from your silence, I’m right, once again, and the shock of realisation has numbed your perfectly sculpted body,” She suddenly lunged forward with open arms, trapping the taller girl in an embrace as she broke down. Until her lungs felt heavy and her breaths became too deep for her to stay afloat. And now she was drowning in her own tears. Courtney was hurt. Really hurt. But it somehow hurt less to basically choke on her sorrow in front of her friends than doing it alone. “And what are you crying about now?” Willam raised her hand to the nape of her back, patting her calmingly.“I…” her words clogged in her throat.“Maybe she needed the title because she needed self-confidence. To know where she stood again,” Alaska butted in, trying to mellow down the mood. “Not everyone can be a self-entitled, cocky gutter whore like you Will.”Alaska’s voice had just enough sweetness to make her sound genuine and thoughtful. Willam replied with a small grin. “Well,” the blonde girl parted from her embrace and gazed at her face on. “I know you Court. And I know you’re not all that smart-”“Will,” the tallest girl had to intrude again, rolled her eyes.“-but if people worship the ground you walk and on and everyone wants to get to know you, it means that you’re still little miss popular,” Courtney could muster up a small chuckle. “Now why don’t we go back to mine and cry over something that’s actually sad. Like Alyssa’s singing voice. Or Alaska’s fashion sense.”Alaska scoffed.“Excuse me? You’re the one whose closet is entirely made up of slutty clothes,” she argued, laughing.“You wore a dress made out of trash bags,” she snorted.“...true.”They all burst out into laughter in unison, trapping Courtney in a tight, tight bubble of joy. They wrapped their arms around each other and knotted her in a messy cluster of snickers and glee. It wasn’t as perfect as she wanted. But this seemed more than enough for her that night.
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“You wanted to see me?”The grass was going dry in this season. So was the air. Jason’s hoodie was now hanging by his hip bone as he knotted it earlier by his waist. Wiping a sweat from his forehead, he took a seat by the familiar grounds. “Yeah,” it was none other than Brian next to him, legs crossed and eyes elsewhere. “Why did you invite me out? I have other things to do you know?” he straightened out his button up shirt and glanced out to the probably-dying-out field. No one seemed to water the grounds anymore and I guess it had a good run. Maybe it’s because the football team lost their last game so there seemed to be no use for it anymore. Jason would like to think that it was because of Matt, and his absence in the team, but apparently they got thrashed to hell. He didn’t really know though. He spent that night with Matt on a sofa while they watched a sappy movie. “First of all, no you don’t Jason,” Brian snorted. “...that wasn’t a good start to what I wanted to talk to you about.”“You could’ve just texted me,” he rolled his eyes. He was already over it.“Well this is a little more serious…? At least for me,” he exhaled. “You know I don’t actually hate you, right?”“Wow, you fooled me. You’re a great actor,” his voice was heavily intoxicated by sarcasm. “Well, Max and I did meet at drama when we were younger,” he shook his head. “Not the point. I wanted to actually apologise.”Jason was quick to give a sneer and brush off his sudden apologetic face and attitude. “About what?” “The whole annual ball thing,” Jason replied with a huff. “Okay, so I was going to apologise for the fact that I left you and did not support you in a night where you got humiliated by a large group of people but from your reaction, I’m guessing that it’s not the apology you wanted. Am I right?”Jason only replied with a fairly unclear gesture as he tipped his head slightly.“Okay, well first of all, I am really sorry. I should’ve supported you more than I did that night. I wanted to make sure that you were okay but...I wouldn’t be lying if I told you I was scared to. I was probably the last person you wanted to see that night and I didn't want to make you any more upset,” he confessed, exhaling. “McCook begged me to look for you though. He was scared shitless.”“I’m glad. N-Not that he was scared but the fact that he cared…” he grinned. “I thought our friendship dwindled.”“I think the power of friendships are underestimated, even though that’s cliche to say,” he looked over to Jason with a slightly smug look. Like a very tame, mild version. It’s the look he gives when he’s trying to hint at something. “And a lot of people, forget that friendships can still be really strong, even when you leave them for a while. Do you get what I’m hinting at?”“The fact that you and Matt were good friends before you left and I should expect you guys to keep that friendship?” he mumbled.“Yeah, but that also leads me to my next apology,” he pressed his lips together, like he was going to somewhat regret what he was going to say. “I’m sorry for shouting at you. And making really funny jokes directed at you,” he snorted at his own joke. “Friend or ex-friend or what not, I should’ve stopped when it was appropriate.”“I’m sorry too. I probably shouldn't have fought back,” he shrugged stiffly.“Did you want me to apologise for breaking up your little relationship for a few days too?”“It was a week!” he disagreed.“So? It was just a fight,” he said nonchalantly. “Matt and I don’t fight,” his tone was backed up firmly.“Well you did,” he snickered sarcastically. “Let me tell you something. Your relationship isn’t perfect. It just won’t ever be. You’re going to fight along the way. Good job for not butting heads so far in the relationship but you’re going to so many times in the future.”“But it was you who basically started this whole mess,” he narrowed his eyes.“Well, think about it like this. Let’s say you two were going to stay together forever. Have a bright future, run away, have cute ass children and all that gay shit. You’re gonna run into people like me or even worse for the rest of your life. Okay?” when Jason glanced away, he continued. “Fights are natural. You're bound to have one once in awhile. It shows how strong the relationship is. If you make it, great. It’s stronger. You’ve learnt another side of each other. If not, then well, maybe it wasn’t meant to be.”He looked at him, dead straight into his eyes, until he gazed up.“So, how did it end?”“...we’re great actually,” he let a small grin creep up to his lips.“There you go. We can point towards anyone with blame and believe in whatever side of the story but the important thing is, you and Matt are still together and you guys are happy. And I’m happy for you two,” he ran his hand down his shoulder to his forearm.“Really?”“Yes really. Of course I’m going to be happy for a good friend. Wouldn’t you be happy if Brian M was in a happy relationship? Or Kurtis? Or Max?”“I thought Brian Mwas in a happy relationship,” he nudged him lightly, Brian quickly brushing it off with a laugh.“Very funny Jason. Can I mention how happy my relationship was with your boyfriend?” the other brunette froze. “That’s what I thought,” when there was another pregnant pause, he rolled his eyes. “...don’t tell me you’re actually jealous.”“Uh…”“We were like 13!” “I don’t know…” he scratched the back of his neck. “He does care about you a lot.”“As friends,” he slurred with slight annoyance.“He was really really excited to have you back. Like, he couldn’t stop talking about it,” he fumbled with his thumbs. “We were best friends you know,” he rubbed his thumb over his shoulder. “...until I got replaced by Max…”“But I just don’t get it,” he shook his head. “You didn’t even sit with us for the last few months before you left.”“Maybe it’s because he wanted to regain his childhood or something?”“What?”“You know... life lately hasn’t been the easiest for him. You know that,” Jason tucked his chin towards his chest and nodded. “I’ve talked to him a lot in the last few weeks, just one on one, and he’s...down. His attitude is low, his personality is dulling and he looks like he’s running out of ambition. He’s not the same, creative and fun-loving Matt I knew. I get that he’s a stoner but this is a whole new low for him."“He’s battling some…” he tried to look for the right wording to not make it so obvious. “...issues right now,” he blinked away his slightly foggy gaze. “It’s nice that you’re trying to help though.”“I doubt I can make a solid impact though," he admitted. "He told me that I remind him of his childhood. That's probably because we were friends when we were younger and...not after that," he shook his head. "Matt is one complex person surprisingly.”“Yeah, I know,” he snickered. “But I love him anyway.”“I know you do,” he gripped his shoulder tightly. “If anyone can help, it’s going to be you,” he gave a long exhale. “And you better fucking help him or you’ll never see the end of it.”“I will...well, try at least,” he knitted his brows together loosely. “You know I care about him more than anything else.”Brian groaned into his hand and suddenly got up. Shoving one hand into his pocket, he reached the other towards him. “Okay, I’ve had enough sappy cliches for one day,” he smirked, waiting for him to take it. Jason stared at it for a moment before quickly accepting it and hopping up. “Do you wanna go to that smoothie place down the street? I haven’t been there since I left.”Jason gazed over at him, a tad confused with the casual conversation, but when he stared back at him with a smile, he continued. “Uhh, yeah. I’m down, but they bumped up the prices,” he smoothed out his trousers. “By how much?”“It’s like $6,”“$6?! Jesus, I’m happy I left this place.”
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“Oh, hey,”
Danny never thought his guitar would fail him like this. He had absolutely nothing to do that day for once. No plans with friends, no school work. But he took it as a positive. He could actually write songs for once, which was something he hadn’t done for...way too long. But of course his strings snap the moment he starts. Okay, so he hadn’t touched it in a while but, he didn’t expect it to just...break.So now he’s at the local music store, broken guitar in hand and his afternoon ruined.
“Oh hey Danny,”
It was a complete surprise to see Brian here with him, sweatshirt slumping over his body and sweatpants bagging over his usually pretty toned legs. “What are you doing here?” he asked, strolling over to him casually. “Getting my guitar fixed,” he exhaled, showing his guitar to him, which right then, looked at if it was pitifully staring up at him. His voice hitched.“Yeah, same actually,” he snickered. Danny’s heart felt more at ease at the comment. “You write?”“Whenever I have free time, yeah I do,” he smiled at the topic. “What about you?”“From time to time. What genre?” “Uh...alternative, I guess? Some grunge, some rock, all that,” he snickered.“So, anything that suits your aesthetic?” he chuckled.“Yeah, I guess,” he scratched the back of his neck. “What about you?”“Country,”“So, anything that suits your aesthetic?” he repeated with a cheesy tone. Brian laughed. “I guess so, Danny Boy,” he smirked.Danny didn't expect himself to be there for that long. There referring to Brian’s side. After a quick revival of his beloved guitar, him and Brian headed down to the grass oval of their school, sneaking through the same hole that, well, they probably all used. It looked so much smaller during the day.Danny never really thought about the overuse of certain chords in his own songs until Brian brought it up. It was sort of interesting actually. Danny knew to keep this in mind for later. “So, are you coming on the long weekend trip with us?” Danny asked, watching Brian tune his guitar.“Don't think so,” he strummed his guitar lightly. “I promised Brian M that we’d hang out.”“Are you guys going anywhere in particular?” “Mm, I don’t think he wants to. I think we’re gonna hang around town,” he shrugged. “What about you guys?”“We have a few things in mind but we haven’t really decided,” he watched Brain wrap his fingers around a few different chord positions. “Maybe the city.”“That’d be nice. It’ll be something different. I bet it’ll be fun,” he encouraged with a smile.“Why don’t you come then?” if it were a few weeks earlier, there was no way Danny would've asked Brian to hang out with them. But from that day, they seemed to grow closer. And he sort of liked him. “I sort of need to make sure that McCook is okay,” he laughed it off cooly but Danny picked up on something underneath his initial tone. “...he’s going through...uhh, how should I say this subtly?”Danny crinkled his brows.“Is he okay?” his voice was now a little tentative.“He’s okay. Well, he could be better but I know he’s getting better. Gradually…” his smile grew quiet like his guitar. “Do you know the issues that Matt's dealing with right now?” Danny stiffened and moved his head up and down awkwardly. “Yeah. It’s sort of like that.”“Oh…” he pursed his lips.“He’s more into coke nowadays, and all that stuff. Like meth and...yeah,” his volume was held back. “He’s always tired and he has the biggest bags under his eyes. He never wants to eat. He feels sick all the time, and there's times where he suddenly gets panic attacks. And I never know what to do. And he’s becoming so moody and I...I don’t know anymore…”Before Danny could reply, Brian just continued.“But he’s getting better. He’s currently relapsing and the after effects aren’t pretty but…” he chortled painfully. “Sorry for being honest all of a sudden...you just seem approachable.”“N-No, it’s okay,” he smiled reassuringly. “I'm guessing that you don't have many people to talk to about this, right?” Brian gave a small nod. “Yeah...I get it. It's horrible. This whole situation is horrible and I'm so sorry that you have to see it unfold like this to your closest friends.""I just hope that..." his thumb brushed down the lowest E string. "...it all gets better. I don't want to wake up one day and find that something bad happened to him. O-Or he's not going to be here..." he sniffed, quickly clearing his throat to cover his tracks. "I probably miss him the most after I left. He's the weirdest guy I know and no one can ever recreate his presence.""I-I don't know him that well. Can you tell me about him?" Danny watched Brian smile to himself, a calmer aura washing over his body."He's a...loveable doofus. I guess. He has the dumbest ideas you'll ever hear. And he goest ahead with them sometimes! It's hilarious. Quirky is an understatement for him, because he is actually batshit crazy," he snickered. "But I love that. I never knew why we worked, or how we worked, but I guess I really stopped caring about that a few years ago. It's when I realised that we just...clicked. And that's about it. And that's all I should care about," he shrugged. "I don't think there's any real logic in our relationship but there's no real logic in Brian himself so it doesn't really matter."Danny grinned."So...by "relationship" you're hinting at...?""Don't even finish that sentence Danny," he shot him a joking look. "He doesn't like labels, and I guess I don't like them either," he yawned. "So there's absolutely nothing.""Just a really, really strong friendship that oozes sexual frustrations?""Yep, that's about it," he laughed. "Thanks for listening to my stupid ramblings. I tend to just...talk a lot.""No problem," he grinned.Brian strummed his guitar once more, humming along with some made up tune. He snickered. “We should work together sometime.”“Hmm? With songs?” he beamed. “Yeah. I bet we’d make some good shit.”
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Jason's ideas never really came true. He gets really excited to do a whole bunch of things; like go to the movies, go out for breakfast, go out early in the morning to see the sunrise—but none of them actually end up happening. It always ends up being the five of them curled up on a sofa for the whole weekend as they binge watch crappy gay movies. Max really likes to critique them unless they’re musicals, and Kurtis always loves that sappy shit. So it confused the heck out of Danny how, and why they were doing this. He was sat in Jason’s car as they loaded the last of Kurtis’s suitcases for the long weekend. They're going to the city as a 5. He doesn't really know how this is going to play out. Every group seems to go away around this time though. Courtney and her friends were going to the beach for the long weekend. Its fairly far from where they're at, maybe like a 2 hour drive, but the city was so much further. He'd never been outside of his neighbourhood, which was sort of pathetic for a teenage boy to say. It was exciting for him. His mom even raised an eyebrow when he said he was going to go. She thought he was going to hurt himself while there, knowing that he’s not exactly the...smartest person ever. So she packed him way too much clothes and money so he’d be okay. He reassured her that he was going to be fine, not knowing if he was really was 100% sure himself.“I’ll probably drive for an hour,” Kurtis called, buckling up his seatbelt and adjusting the rear view mirror. “Can someone cover when we hit the bridge?”“Umm yeah, I’ll take it,” Matt answered, taking up the last spot in the car. Kurtis being the driver was probably not the best idea, but they all agreed to take equal turns in driving. Well, the three that could actually drive. Danny apparently wasn’t allowed to drive until he finished school according to his mom. She thought he’d be a dangerous driver.“Is there an aux cord anywhere?” Jason sat in the middle seat, which usually meant that he could choose the songs. Actually, that’s a lie. It didn’t matter where he sat, he usually chose the songs anyway. “Jason, please don’t play your weird fetish songs this time,” Max groaned, holding it within his hands. “I won’t! I promise,” he snatched it and plugged his phone in. “Can we make it an unwritten rule that we only play gay songs for the rest of the trip?” Kurtis began to reverse out of his driveway. Danny shook his head.“No way. It takes like 5 hours to get there!” he moaned.“You’re underestimating my abilities to name most of Mariah Carey’s power ballads,” he argued with a smirk.“And Madonna,” Matt chimed in. “And don’t forget Lady Gaga,” even Max joined in. Danny smiled at that. Baby steps.“And obviously Beyonce,” Jason smacked Danny’s shoulder jokingly.“Okay, got it. We can all name countless gay songs,” he rolled his eyes and chuckled.“But what about you?” Matt asked, popping his head to the side.“Yeah, you probably have some sort of guilty pleasure, right?” Jason nudged. Danny sighed.“I mean, I have a soft spot for Britney but-”They all shriek like little girls. What kind of movie were they in now? Danny rolled his eyes. But...he did admittedly like some of these songs, like the Spice Girls which was playing at the time. “Argh, she is the epitome of gay culture,” Max grinned. “And Cher?” He laughed. “Oh no! You, know who's great? Fucking Paula Abdul.”“Paula Abdul coming right up,” Jason scrolled through his Spotify. Danny never imagined in a million years that he'd be sitting in a full car with Vibeology loudly screaming through the speakers. They were the annoying teenagers who blasted their music deafeningly for the whole world to hear, but Danny didn’t really mind it. He hated seeing them, but it’s different when you’re apart of it I guess. When he’s apart of something that made him feel so powerful and proud, it made him, no them, feel so undefeatable. Around a few hours in, after many random stops for sight seeing, bathroom breaks and gas, they crossed the bridge that Kurtis was talking about. Danny didn’t really imagine it to be like this when he heard about it. He thought it was gonna be wimpy, small and maybe creaky, but it was huge. It stretched along a river which was bluer and sparkler than he ever imagined. Well, it was sad to say, but this was the first time he saw a river. And it looked beautiful and serene. It was just like the grassy fields at his school. He rolled down the window and stuck his arm through, resting his elbow by the edge. The air smelt saltier than before. Much more crisp and thin. His shaggy hair blew back against the wind, tickling his lower neck as he brushed it aside. He didn’t realise how long it grew out. “If you turn left here, you’ll find the beaches,” Max informed, gesturing over to a parted road like a flight stewardess. “Sounds like something Courtney would do. What’s she doing this long weekend?” Kurtis, who was now sitting by his side, asked. “Yeah she’s off the beach with Willam and Alaska,” he smiled at the thought. He watched Courtney play around in the water in his mind. Probably wearing that pink bikini she bought at the mall the other day, which Danny accompanied her to because she dragged him out. And Willam would be by her side, trying to dunk her into the water to make her scream. Or she’d do something really out of the blue and stupid because that’s exactly what she’s like and Court loves it. She liked surprises. Alaska would say some snarky and witty comment to make the whole atmosphere warm and secluded. They had such a tight bond, ever since Courtney joined the cheerleading squad. It must have been first year of high school when they all met, because Danny doesn’t remember how she became so popular and now that she’s a senior, the top of the social food chain. They’d been crazy close childhood friends so why did one of them end up being top dog who rules the school with an iron fist with the quarterback and the other as a forgettable nobody who writes songs in his free time and cry in the other hours of the day?You know, now that Danny thought about it, no matter how mad he was supposed to be at Court, he really couldn’t be. He really did love her at the end of the day. “Hmm, I’m pretty sure Roy's there too this weekend," Kurtis replied, before he could ease into a comfortable smile though, Jason flicked to his next song. “I swear to god Jason if you play one more Britney Spears song I will-““Sorry Kurtis, I accidentally pressed it,” he joked, guiltily pulling an over dramatic expression as he put down his phone. The shorter boy pinched his nose. “Ooh, can we play Selena next?” Danny enthused. “Of course!”“Okay real talk for a second,” Kurtis intruded. “Do we know the directions to the hotel?”“I have it up on Google Maps,” Max replied confidently. “And what about-?”“The restaurant? I also have the directions up in a different tab. I’m planning to make a reservation in 15 minutes so I can accurately estimate the time we get there,”That was the moment when Danny knew that Max was too amazing and pure for this world. He was so organised. So good at planning that he was guaranteed to be the most successful person in the history of their school. Even in saying that, he had a really soft and fun side to him. He sang along with everyone else in the car, though he was a little more on tune than the rest, and he laughed till his lungs gave out. The smile on his face reassured Danny that Max was safe and okay mentally. By then, the sun was finally starting to set, just enough for the edges of the sky to crinkle a little into a red. The buildings approaching them looked ever so tall. So grand. They were stretched towards the skies. Billions of them, scattered around like a concrete jungle. Danny was shocked. It looked as if the car was going to get swallowed up by the city. Literally digested by the towers that never seemed to end. From there, he couldn’t see the top. Nowhere near. He was still in awe by them when he stepped out. His eyes were practically glued onto them. Max had booked them two rooms, one with a king sized bed, and the other with a queen and a single. And of course the couple got the king sized so Kurtis, Max and Danny had to figure out who was going to sleep where.As they walked into their assigned rooms, the two tallest boys immediately darted their gazes towards the queen sized bed. It would have been much more comfortable for the two of them, so Kurtis happily agreed to the single bed. “Don’t forget to put on a jacket. It’s getting cooler,” Max reminded, being the typical mom of the group. “Which brown coat looks better?” Kurtis pulled out two, probably much too expensive jackets from his suitcase. “The darker one. It matches your hair better,” Danny shot in his point of view. Kurtis hummed in agreement. “It’ll take us approximately five minutes to get there so that means we’ll arrive a tad early,” Max smiled to himself, zipping back up his suitcase. “Okay, let’s go.”The boy absolutely loved being organised, and there was this certain smile he pulled whenever he was satisfied with his calculations. It also put a smile on everyone else’s face from how cute it was. Danny especially. Grabbing his jacket, he slipped it on and joined the other two in the hallway. By then, the couple was waiting outside in the hallway, leaning against the wall with small chat filling the air. “So, it’s down the street, then to the left of some bar,” Max explained, his eyes down on his screen. “Does everyone have their wallets?” Everyone replied with a nod. “Ok good. Let’s go.”The city somehow smelt different to what he was used to. It had a scent of dense cigarettes and petrol, mixed in with the oddest aroma of dreams and aspirations. People around him were rushing home after a busy day of work. Many with their eyes on their phones, if not, then in the path in front of them, with their eyes narrowed and bold as if they knew exactly where they were going. They looked so stern and confident. Danny sort of loved that. He didn’t see himself in their shoes though. Not now, not ever. He couldn’t imagine himself growing old to have a desk job, putting on a suit every morning and rushing off to catch a train. That wasn’t him. But it sort of inspired him in the oddest way to continue on with life. He couldn’t exactly put his finger as to why. It just looked sort of...cool…? That they’re approaching life head on. Taking things seriously. That’s something he still couldn’t do and he’s going to graduate next year. The people, overall, just looked different in the city too. Couples seemed happier. They would walk past him, hand in hand, of all genders, all races. And maybe they wouldn’t even bat an eye towards him, but he was gazing at them. Sort of jealous. Mostly inspired. That would never be accepted where he lived. But here, it looked normal. He was in awe. And they seemed to all realise that, as a group. It was weird to be an environment where everything that was alien to their community was a reality. Where everyone just seemed...happy. Comfortable. The happy they all wished they could be. But then again, everything was really busy. Everything was moving so quickly and constantly. They knew they wouldn’t be able to keep up forever. So the holiday thing was nice. Actual reality probably wouldn’t be. But it was sort of nice to think they were apart of that world. Just for a few days. But it confused Danny. Danny didn’t really know what teenagers did anymore. Because what they’re doing, as teenagers, is probably what adults do. Or that’s what he imagined. Their meals had an expensive taste, the clothes they were wearing was just on the smart casual spectrum, and they were at a fancy restaurant. Even though their drinks were lemonade, and it wasn’t some fancy wine that would make the mood much more mature, it was enough for them. “This was great,” Max finished the last of his meal, neatly placing the fork and knife together and dabbing lightly at his lips with his napkin. “Mmm agreed. It’s nice to do something other than sit around and watch movies all day,” Jason sat back, grinning. The tallest boy coughed and reached for his near-empty glass of lemonade. They’d all agreed to pour it into their empty champagne glasses for fun, and it seemed fairly festive at this point. “To us,” he raised. The other four beamed in unison. “For living yet, another amazing year. Thank you, for being some of the bestest friends I could’ve asked for. I really appreciate it.”“And thank you guys. I appreciate how everyone stands up for me here. Even through all the hell we have to face,” Jason added, his eyes darting over to Matt, like he was passing on the baton. “And I’m so happy that we’re all still here,” he chuckled. “That we’re all great friends and we’re having so much fun to this day.”“And thanks guys, for putting up with me,” they all laughed at Kurtis's comment. “And also listening to all my problems, and in return I love listening to your problems. I just like the thought that we’re overcoming so much together. As friends.”Kurtis nudged it onto Danny. The final one. “And…” he sighed. “I’m really happy that you all let me into the group. You embraced me with open arms and I didn’t ever think I’d find a group who’s caring and as nice as you guys. I...I really mean it. It means a lot to me. I thought I was going to be stuck in dead end friendships and people that would never click with me properly and, well, I was wrong. The only thing I regret is not talking to you guys sooner.”He shrugged. “To us,” Max smiled towards him warmingly.“To us!”
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
The dirt rumbled beneath his feet. It was an odd sensation, feeling the crusty ground rub against the bottom of his shoes. Danny found that the uniform fit him better than it used to, the white fabric sitting on top of his shoulders shapely instead of slouching over his upper arms. The glove was still a tad too big though. He swore it would slip off any second now, and it felt hot and itchy anyway. He probably just wanted it to slip off. His mom had signed him up for baseball so he actually had something to do. He’s not the most social kid you’ll ever meet and he lacks the confidence to speak up so she figured that this would be a good social sport for him. And also he could maybe learn how to throw a ball as well. But of course he didn’t learn that skill. Yet? After a few moments of picking at his glove uncomfortably, he had tossed it aside to gaze at the flowers by the side of the field.They were an array of pinks and reds, all looking glossy as they proudly faced towards him. He pursed his lips. They wouldn’t notice him being gone, right? It would only be a few moments. And as of now, they didn’t seem to even hit the ball this far out. So he slipped past supervision and ran towards the flowers, lunging hands first into the patch. The petals swayed by his knees. He laughed, his fingertips brushing along the grass.
“Fag boy!”
He suddenly sat up, panting, hands clutching onto the sheets of his hotel bed. Sweat trickled down his forehead passing his bitten lip. Kurtis was fast asleep on the single bed, one leg hooked over the blankets and the other tucked under. He looked fairly peaceful. Danny shuffled out of his bed, feeling the heat trapped within his sheets.
“You’re such a sissy Danny!”
One of the saddest things for him was knowing that it could never be erased from his memories. Like it was imprinted so deeply that there was no way he could rub it off. Danny closed the door behind him. Kurtis wouldn’t mind. He briefly glanced at the buttons in the elevator before he chose the top level: the roof. He figured it was quiet and empty up there, which is just what he needed right now to clear his head. His chest continued to churn at the memory. It’s not that he forgot about it, of course not, but he hadn’t thought about it in so long. He never needed to think about it but…I guess his dreams just decided to ambush him out of nowhere. He closed his eyes for a moment until the elevator made a small ‘ding’ sound and the doors opened.
“Danny?”
This time, it was a voice outside of his mind. He snapped up to see Max by a singular bench, his legs crossed over and his hair flipped over messily. “Max?” he made his way over to him, sitting stiffly by his side. “What are you doing up here?”“I-I couldn’t sleep,” he cleared his throat and glanced away. “I’m guessing you can’t either?”“I’m...I’m not good at sleeping in unfamiliar mattresses,” he admitted, and though it was somewhat true, that wasn’t why he was here. “Yeah, I get that,” he coughed. “Is it the bad allergies you were telling me about?” he nodded. “Yeah, I understand.”“What about you?” he questioned back, unable to meet his gaze. “I…” he exhaled. “I haven’t been able to sleep for a while…” he admitted, his hands cupping over each other. “My thoughts seem to keep me up. Constantly. And I can never sleep.”“What kind of thoughts…?” his voice wavered just a tad from nerves.“I can’t stop thinking about every single possible future that’s out there. I can’t stop imagining everything that might go wrong in the future. Or it’s like...my mind just doesn't stop working. Won’t stop thinking. And I can’t get to sleep,” his fingers ran up and down his hand. “I haven’t been able to sleep for months. And when I do finally get to sleep, I can’t wake up.”Danny stayed silent for a moment, trying to comprehend everything. “Max…” he began. “...I...I think you need to see someone.”“W-What?” he squeezed out a nervous chuckle. “Sleep’s, like, super important. This isn’t healthy. It’s not good for you. Trust me, maybe you need to talk to someone. A school counselor is--”“Thanks Danny, but I’m pretty sure I’m fine,” he somewhat snapped, his voice growing a little firmer. “I think it’s all the studying, and everyone’s lives and--”“Being a pessimist is one thing but--”“I’m not a pessimist Danny,” he informed him, sounding like he was a teacher talking to a student. “I’m a perfectionist. A realist. I think of every possible future and I try and fix it before it comes.”“That sounds like anxiety to me…” it was almost a whisper“You’re no psychologist Danny. I don’t think you have the right to--” he continued to fidget in his lap. “Yeah, I’m not. But I’m worried about you and I want you to see someone. Someone who is informed and can help you,” he edged his way over to him. “I don’t think I appreciate being told that I’m mentally ill,”“It’s just to be safe! Max, you’re so generous and caring, but I don’t want you to dwell on everything so much,” he grabbed onto his hands, stopping him from squirming.“But I need to Danny!” he thrusted backwards, taking back his hands to his chest. “I-I need to think of every possible outcome just in case something goes wrong. What if something goes terribly wrong and I can’t...I can’t fix it. I wouldn’t know what to do.”“I’m pretty sure you’re smart enough to figure something out,” he tried again; edging closer to try and comfort him. “But that’s the problem! I don't think I’m smart enough,” he bit down on his lip. “...everyone always expects me to be but...I’m not actually that intelligent. I’m not that capable. And heck, people need to stop thinking I can do more than I’m actually able to.”Danny paused. “...what’s gotten into you so suddenly? I thought--”“Whatever you thought is wrong. This is the truth, okay?” his words were quivering as he hiccuped. The younger boy just sat there instead. He completely turned his attention over to him and crossed his legs on top of the bench. “Is this because you’re gay…?” his voice was more of a faint murmur.“N-Nothing goes well for me...” he wrinkled his brows together faintly. “...I think the world’s just looking down on me constantly. I never get the results I want, and everyone else seems like they do. I don’t think the world likes me being happy,” he parted his lips before halting and looking over to Danny. “...I don’t think I’ve been properly happy for a really long time…”“Max…” he placed his hand on on top of his again, ever so lightly, just so Max wouldn’t flinch. “Please don’t think like that. Trust me it gets better. People say it gets better for a reason,” he exhaled. “I know what it’s like, to think that nothing goes well and you’re going nowhere in life. I’ve been there. I was there less than a year ago. But you need to keep on fighting through it. Just a little bit longer.”“But how much longer?” His bottom lip quavered. He was looking up at him innocently, like a little child who looked lost. Really lost. And Danny felt like he knew something Max didn’t. And he was somehow smart in someway for knowing this. And in the past, he would’ve probably been really happy that he was on top of someone who was known for being...well, on top. But this time he wasn’t. He felt bad for him. He pitied him. Not like some homeless person on the street, but pitied him like his friend who couldn’t really understand how amazing he was. And it was something that everyone knew except him. Danny sighed. “Let me tell you something that’s worked for me,” he started, Max’s eyes instantly glowing with intrigue. “It’s how you think of the situation. Okay? I know that might sound stupid but it’s all the little things that make life amazing. It’s how grateful you feel for every small thing, how bright that day seems compared to others, how far you’ve come.”“I...I don’t get it…?” He didn’t seem to be able to wrap his head around the situation. “I know, I’ve been there,” he tried to laugh it off to sweeten the mood. “I think I’ve taken all of you guys for granted honestly. Some things that I’ve brushed off...I look back and smile because they were truly amazing memories and I didn’t realise it at the time.”“Like what?”“Like,” he grinned. “All those weekends where we hung at Jason’s, and he gossips so much. I love the face he makes when he gets excited and claps his hands.”Danny gazed over at him like he was nudging him playfully.“Or that time we all went to Kurtis’s cafe while he was working, just to give him the most complex order. And it pissed him off so much,” he chuckled at the memory. He really did look angry that day, but the way he laughed it off afterwards was priceless.“Or all those times Matt scored a goal at his games, and he did this stupid dorky dance,”“He really does have two left feet,” he snorted, though it came off a little weak. “And he would point towards us like what boyfriends do to girlfriends in American movies,” he bit down on his lip when Max’s expression stood still. “Or, that time I went back to yours and you let me hear your amazing oboe solo,” Max blushed at the comment. “I loved it. Also, how did that solo go?”“I-It went really well,” he cleared his throat. “...really good. The director said it was his favourite piece of the day…”“There you go, that’s an amazing memory right?”“I mean…” he gave a faint smile. “Yeah, yeah it was.”“What you said about the world; how it doesn’t look out for you? Well, I don’t believe in fate so maybe I’m not the biggest help, but for me, I think that you make your path as you go along with it. Like..." he pondered for a moment. "You like the 'Wizard of Oz' right?"Max gasped."I love it! It's my favourite movie and book of all time," "Well, it's like putting down the actual yellow bricks, as you go along the yellow brick road. You make your own future, you know?""Danny, that literally has nothing to do with the movie,""I just wanted to make a point," he pouted jokingly. "Anyway, just know that whatever happens in the future, and all these moments passing, you can do whatever you want.”“What…?” Max crinkled his brows. “You’re making no sense Danny…”“You can do whatever you want!” He was borderline laughing. “The future isn’t planned out for you. It’s not written yet,” he grabbed his hands and yanked him up. “So that means you can go like this,” he whacked his hands, the taller boy’s arms flicking backwards. “Or this.”He lunged up towards him, wrapping his arms around his waist tightly. “D-Danny?” A mumble-like giggle rumbled through Max's throat. “And we could dance like idiots up here,” Danny's hands held onto his tightly, basically suffocating his wrists as he held out their arms and swung him around. Max bursted out into laughter. His cackle echoed throughout the empty space as he spread his lips wider than he ever did before and beamed. His chest began to collapse into his ribs as he tumbled onto Danny, his legs quickly giving out beneath him. He was borderline crying. He wiped a tear from his eye as he roared out his final breath of hiccuping chuckles. “I bet you didn’t see that coming a few seconds ago,” he laughed, a toothy grin piercing through. Max finally caught his breath. “Yeah, you’re right,” he caved in, an incredibly satisfied expression washing over his face. “See? You write your future as you go along with the present. You’ll miss out on all the absolutely amazing things you can create if you just give up now,” he held their gazes firmly. It was just long enough for Max to completely melt into bliss in that moment. “Yeah,” he mumbled through his parted lips.Danny stretched his smile further, even with the peaking scratches by Max’s wrists, which just made it into his field of vision. It was deep, from what Danny saw. Fresh. But Max picked at his long jumper and pulled it over his hands, like he was freezing a little in the cold temperature.“It’s getting cold, isn’t it?” his eyes skimmed above him and towards the sky.“Yeah it is,” he pressed his lips together, hard. Max wrapped his arms over his slightly smaller body. He felt a little more at ease with the warmth.“We should head inside.”Danny couldn’t stop thinking about that split second. That split second when he saw a little too much. Now Max was curled up beside him, his hands snugly placed by his waist for comfort and his breath hovering by his neck. And there Danny was, staring blankly at the ceiling, wondering what to do with himself and the boy next to him.
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
It felt familiar to Danny. They were all chatting over breakfast like they usually do on the weekend, except this time, they went to nicely decorated cafe in the city, and it was much better here than at Jason’s. No offence to Jason. It was a nice modern cafe with splashes of flora everywhere. It’s what Danny imagined as a cafe designed for vegans. He had to take Courtney here one day. Also the avocado toast was to die for, even though that’s such a typical white girl thing to say.“Okay, okay but I really wanted to go catch a ferry to the other side of the city! It looked so cool and none of us have ever been on a boat. It’ll be a cool experience right?” Matt was trying to encourage his point of view, while sipping on his morning coffee.“But I really wanted to go to Starbucks. Seriously, we have none in our area and I want to live out my white girl fantasy,” Jason whined, eating the last of his food before shoving it aside. “Ok, what about this?” Max always seemed to suggest something smart in these situations, which was something they all appreciated. “We’ll all pick something that we want to do. We can talk about them now so we can make a set schedule for the day. Well, I will. And we'll, I mean technically I'll, make a plan to suit everybody. Sound good?" he received nods from everyone. "Okay then. Suggest away."“Starbucks,” Jason jabbed in his suggestion first.“I say ferry,” Matt joined in.“I want to go shopping. At that really big mall we saw when we drove here,” Kurtis smiled.“What about you Danny?” Max asked before whipping out his phone, presumably, to look at Google Maps again. “Umm…” he pondered for a moment. “I don’t really have anything I want to do in particular.”“Nothing?” Kurtis asked. “Yeah,” he nonchalantly shrugged. “He can decide something while we’re out I suppose,” Max noted. “Okay, I want to go to an aquarium, and that’s…” he scrolled down his virtual map. “Okay. Got it. I have a plan set.”“What would we do without you?” Matt grinned towards him, the taller boy pressing his lips together to smooth out his smile. “Seriously, you’re the best. Thanks so much.”Max and Danny exchange a small look before the youngest boy gave him a small wink. Max beamed.The day started off with Jason’s request. And yeah, the pumpkin spice lattes were good, which Danny hated to admit. But the selfies weren’t fun. Both Kurtis and Jason loved taking them. Like, really liked them. After an endless sea of selfies with the whole group, they somehow took more individually. He wondered if they had botox injections so they stopped feeling the muscles in their face. No normal person can pull such a stunning expression for that long, right?He could imagine Courtney getting one of these. He wondered if they had a starbucks near where they were. He betted that they would have all loved it. And Courtney would accidentally let the froth stain her lips and her collar, and Willam would cackle while Alaska laughed encouragingly and tried to help. And eventually, the head cheerleader would laugh too, giving in to that overwhelming sense of comfort.He shook his head. The streets somehow felt different too in the city. The breeze was a tad cooler, but it was a nice sense of cool. It was just enough to make him feel more refreshed and relaxed. It intertwined with his hair and his clothes but in the most oddly satisfying way. The seaside air also smelt amazing too. Just a tad salty, but it made him feel more awake. No wonder Matt wanted to go onboard. “I’ve never seen colours like this before…” Max mumbled, his hands clutched onto the edge of the rails. They were stood at the front of the boat, which was an area with no shelter. It felt...freeing. To stand there and soak in the air like this. “I’m flying Jack! I’m flying!” Jason screamed cheesily at the top of his lungs, somehow accomplishing, the single handedly most cliche thing he could’ve done on the nose of the ferry. Matt was tightly holding onto his waist, his body pressed up against him from the back. Kurtis bursted out into laughter.“You know it’s a pity I didn’t keep on drawing! It would’ve been worth more in the morning!” Kurtis called, cupping his hands by his lips.“You bastard!” Jason squealed back. “How many times have they watched the Titanic?” Danny asked, literal confusion staining his face. “Too many times,” Max informed, pinching his nose.The aquarium was probably the most typical place they could’ve gone...if they were all on a date…? Either way, it wasn’t like what Danny expected. It was calming. The deep blues and the dark lit pathways. Fish majestically swimming above him. It was so picturesque it hurt. Max was strolling beside him, his hands clasped behind his back. He looked like such an old soul.“Do you enjoy it Danny?” he asked, his voice quiet.“Yeah, it’s really relaxing,” he watched Max’s eyes roam elsewhere. “My parents took me to an aquarium when I was younger. But they lost me in the first few minutes because I began running towards the dolphins,” he laughed. “That was probably the last trip we’ve ever gone as a family.”“When was it?”“When I was 8,” he chuckled airily. “...I don't know. My father changed that year. And my mother’s always been loyal to my father so she just went along with everything he did. He just become so much more...angry. Vicious. And he began to lash out at us a lot. Especially me,” he tucked his hands into his pockets. “He thinks that we lost touch after a few years. Because I’m not as masculine as he wants me to be…maybe I'm glad we haven't gone out as a family.”“My dad hated that too,” he confessed. Max gazed over at him. “He left, ages ago though. And I don’t even like to admit that he has any impact in my life,” he huffed. “But when he was there, he put me in every sport possible, and I used to fail at every single one. I just wanted to sing. To dance. To stay home and draw and it infuriated him.”“I’m glad someone understands,” he murmured. “My father wants me to quit oboe.”“What?” his sudden volume made other spectators turn around. He froze in the attention. “...why?”“He thinks it’s for girls,” he rolled his eyes. “That’s the stupidest thing I’ve ever heard.”“Don’t let him get in the way of what you love, okay?” Danny tried to reassure his confidence. “You’re your own individual. And he’s not going to fucking take that away from you, okay?”Before Max could fully reply, the couple came waltzing past, hand in hand, super lovey dovey. Enough to make the young boy knit his brows together. Man, he was lonely.Kurtis was the last to come out, arms trapping the bags of gifts he seemed to buy. Max asked him why he decided to, since they still had one more thing to do, which was to shop, but he reassured him that everything was going to be fine.And he somehow was. Lucky he was rich enough to afford all this, because he had trolleys worth of clothes he wanted. And shit, they would look good on him. Danny thought he could pull off everything.“That jacket’s nice though. Gives me a very 90s boy band vibe,” Jason pointed over, quickly joining in on the fun. They were always on the same page somehow. Their arms were linked, and they proceeded to strut down the walkway. Matt rolled his eyes, continuing to push the overflowing trolley.“Shouldn't we go back soon? We still need to do what Danny wants,” Matt informed, already done with all of this. “It’s sundown in just under an hour,” Max noted. Danny gulped.“I...haven’t really thought of anything actually,” he admitted. “See? We’re fine then,” Kuris brushed off.“Also…” Matt rubbed his eyes. “I feel really sick…” his steps became slower and slower until he eventually stopped. Danny looked behind him and quickly ran over. “Sorry...I’m feeling really, really nauseous all of a sudden.”“T-That’s okay,” Danny pressed his palm against his forehead. “Oh my god Matt, you’re burning.”Jason suddenly dropped his stance and rushed over.“Babe?” he slumped Matt's arm over his own shoulder. “We’ll go back to the hotel room, okay? It’s okay.”So the whole happy vibe they had going was short lived. With a speedy trip in a taxi back to the hotel, the couple quickly dashed back to their own room, never to be seen again for the rest of the night.Max sighed.“I’m really sorry that we couldn’t figure out something to do for you,” he apologised to Danny back in their own hotel room. The younger boy shrugged.“It’s okay, honestly,” he grinned. “I finally thought up something though.”“What is it?” Kurtis was now taking off his shoes.“We can still do it now actually.”And so he took both of their hands and lead them to the exact spot he was imagined.The roof looked much more majestic with the sunset, though it did look pretty nice during the night too. He lead them to the familiar bench.“I wanted to watch the sunset,” he gave a toothy grin. “Wow, is it just me, or is the sky so much redder than I remembered?” Kurtis’s eyes were glued on the cloak above them, which was dyed a mix of orange and red. “It does look amazing from here,” Max slumped back, his head lightly resting on the top of the bench. It looked like the sky was coated over them like a painting, with the brush strokes almost like gentle glides. “Mmm, I think it probably looks as good in our usual lunch spot. But I guess we’re not there to appreciate that,” his voice eventually muted itself as he gazed up at the stars.He watched the sky drift into a deep blue. Like it was a play at its final scene. With darkness dying above, and only a few sparkles for light and a slim shaped moon. He watched the last winds of colour completely dissolve into black. “The skyline looks amazing from here,” Max’s index finger traced around the buildings far away like he was carving them out. He glanced over to Danny, his face completely in awe. His pupils were dilated and his lips were slightly parted. “You look like you’re swimming in the stars.”“I feel like I am one,” he gave a husky chortle. “...it’s amazing.”“I think your activity was my favourite,” Kurtis murmured through his still expression. “...even though I got an awesome vintage, leather jacket today.”And Danny, himself, right then, felt his whole body give out. Like it was going limp all of a sudden. And he felt the bottom of his feet tingle, like he was falling into the state of complete bliss. Somehow the sky seemed to be swallowing him, the serene feeling rushing through his body.And he felt completely at peace with life at that moment.
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
“You told me you quit,”
Matt was now lying in their queen sized bed, his whole body neatly tucked underneath the sheets. A cool towel was resting on top of his forehead, the water oozing down to the tip of his nose. Jason was sat beside him, his hand lightly tracing down the features of his face. “I did…” he mumbled, his voice just audible through his slightly parted lips. “It’s just relapsing.”“How long is that supposed to last? It’s been so long,” he hunched his shoulders over. “You’ve become so skinny lately. And you seem less responsive. I don’t know...you don’t chime into the conversations as much as you used to I guess. Maybe it’s something that I only realise…”“I’m getting better. Don’t worry,” his words were muffled. “...the hardest part for me is the urge…”“To continue doing it?” he nodded stiffly. “Well," he repositioned himself so he could be closer to him. "Don’t give in. Seriously Matt, you’re not going to let it get to you. I know you can overcome this.”He dug his hand underneath the sheets and shuffled around to grasp onto his hand. When he did so, he could feel how hot he was. He was literally burning. “You’re burning Matt,” he practically blurted out, tracing the backside of his hand. “Do you need water? Anything to eat? Or do you want to just rest?”Matt groaned.“...can you just come here…?” he sleepily raised the sheets, only able to just lift them up a millimetre. “Of course babe,” he helped him with the motion, quickly ducking under and embracing him. “Anything else?”“...can you tell me a bedtime story?” he asked, his voice lacking that joking tone Jason wanted to hear. But he chuckled anyway. To fill up the emptiness he didn't want to admit to.“How old are you?” “Not only enough…” he snickered. Jason rolled his eyes. “Fine, okay,” he thought for a moment. “What genre?""Fantasy..." he sort of moaned it tiresomely but with an enthusiastic face. "Once upon a time there was an incredibly beautiful princess. Like she was so beautiful and gorgeous and breathtaking that no one could clock her look,”“Wow I wonder who that is…” he practically whispered down his neck.“And she was taken away by this dick with a stupid hairstyle because she was unique and he didn’t like that. He’s basically a communist,” he blabbered, Matt gently laughing. “And she thought there was absolutely no way out. She was kept in this tower that made her feel claustrophobic. He would never let her out. She had to wake up every single day, knowing that he would ruin that day for her. He used to beat her, punch her across the face and kick her until she turned purple, and she absolutely hated that. She honestly couldn’t find any way to escape it except...ok that’s too dark for a bedtime story,” he cleared his throat. Matt watched his face twitch slightly and he felt his heart nearly drop out of his body.“But one day, this amazing prince decided to step in. He rode in this cool majestic horse and he rescued the princess. But he wasn’t violent like the asshole. No, he was kind. And he used words to make him back off. And he took her hand and they ran away together to live happily ever after,” he whimsically expressed. “And she was totally trying to come onto him after that. It was weird, because, they knew each other before but they didn’t get along too well at first. Because she was, admittedly, pretty bitchy. But he saved her anyway because he’s really nice. And even though she got friend zoned at first, they eventually got together. And that was the absolute best moment of her life,”“Wow that’s really original…” he rested his hands by his waist. “I know! I made it up all by myself,” he smiled playfully.“My favourite part hasn’t happened yet though…” Matt’s voice was a tad hoarse. “What do you mean?” Jason turned around, feeling the heat basically radiating off of his body. “The part where the princess and the prince run away together forever. And they get married and live the life they truly want to,” Jason blushed at the comment.“That’s my favourite part too,” he murmured, his sentence quickly cut off by their lips locking. Jason tasted something he’d never tasted before that moment. It was...bitter. That citrus-like taste that made him feel like something was wrong. But he couldn’t really put his finger on as to why. “You’re going to stay here forever, right?” Jason couldn’t help but to blurt out, an oddly heavy feeling weighing down on his chest. “By your side?” He parted slightly to gaze at his eyes. “Of course.”“Good.”He felt his arms wrap around him somewhat loosely. And he was sweating, burning behind his own skin but Jason didn’t care. He still loved the feeling of being held like that. And when he felt Matt's heartbeat settle into an easily countable pace, he relaxed himself. He had lost track of time by then, not knowing how many seconds, minutes or hours went by. All he knew was that his eyes felt heavier and Matt was now falling asleep. But he wasn't that tired. He didn't really care about that feeling. He just wanted to make sure that Matt was happy and he was sleeping. And now he wasAnd also that face filled with complete bliss was to die for. So Jason glanced up, scanned over his expression one more time, smiled to himself, and let his body ease into slumber.
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
Danny was a little thankful when he started recognising the houses again. He was back in the neighbourhood, exhausted and incredibly tired, but still happy with the experience. It was something he’d never experienced before, and thank god he actually did something exciting for once. If only he did that before Brian came so he could’ve bragged about it.“So who am I dropping off first?” Kurtis decided to drive the last few miles home since Jason seemed tired. Him and Matt were curled up in the back seats, looking as dead as ever. It looked like he struggled to sleep the night before.“Probably Matt. He doesn’t look too good,” Max replied, his eyes tentatively gazed at him. “I-I’m okay. Just a little tired,” he rubbed his eyes. “I actually promised to meet up with Brian McCook today.”Danny widened his eyes a tad. “I thought he was off with Brian Firkus,” he said, his mind quick to link the two individuals together. And then the thoughts of relapsing crossed his mind, and Brian M’s current state, and Matt’s and—“He’s the one who asked me to hang out,” he shrugged. “So I just agreed. And plus it’s only, like, for a few hours since it’s already 1.”“I’ll probably be heading off to study then. I still need to catch up on that assignment,” Max rubbed his temples. “The English one? I thought that was a group task,” Kurtis raised an eyebrow. “I mean, it is but the people in my group seem pretty useless at the task so…”“Don’t push yourself too hard, okay?” Matt gave him a small smile before uncomfortably shifting in his seat. Yeah, he still seemed really tired and it baffled Danny as to why he wanted to still go out. “Thanks. But I think I’m fine,” the taller boy grinned to himself. “And what about you Jason? Where are you off to?” The driver questioned. “I don’t really have any plans actually…” he thought for a moment. “Hey Danny, do you wanna hang out?”The younger boy was a little surprised. “Uh, yeah sure,” he beamed. “Then can you drop us off at mine?”The cheerleader’s house was as pleasant as Danny remembered. The large windows made the overall lighting bright, and there was a gentle breeze blowing through which refreshed the younger boy. Its design was much more modernised compared to all the other houses in the area with a lot of open space and simple, block colours. “Make yourself at home,” he called, Danny losing grip of his luggage by his entrance. “Do you want anything to drink? Anything to eat?”“I’m pretty full to be honest,” he confessed, following in the taller boy’s footsteps. “That was a pretty big brunch.”“Tell me about it. I think I’m going to lose this amazingly corseted figure of mine,” he chortled lightly. “Ha, very funny. You still look fucking great,” Danny chuckled. “Even though corsets hurts like a bitch, I sort of like it. I like the whole thing. It feels…” he gushed. “Amazing. To feel so glamorous and beautiful.”“It must be,” he glanced down for a moment, the events of that one Christmas dinner playing through his mind for a split second. “You’d look great in drag,” he turned the doorknob to his bedroom, letting the younger boy in. “I mean, look at those lips. It looks like you’ve gotten injections.”“I’d love to try it,” he smiled, sitting down by his bed. “Yeah?” Jason opened up his closet to reveal a wide range of makeup stacked on top of each other in a box. “It might take a while.”“No, it seems fucking cool. I wanna do it,” he enthused, clapping his hands together excitedly. “Okay. Okay,” his eyes squinted slightly as he smiled. Jason took a seat in front of him, quickly glancing over his features. His palm ran over his cheek lightly. “Mm, I’ve never worked on your face before, so no guarantees,” he gave a small wink before rummaging through his equipment. “Have you done anything like this before?”“Uhh...once. Maybe. It doesn’t really count though,” he shrugged, feeling the cold liquid foundation hit his skin. “Courtney dressed me up when we were 8. And then we went to a neighbourhood gathering for Christmas.”Jason hissed in slight discomfort. “That’s not good,” “It really wasn’t,” he laughed it off. “Brad’s dad screamed at me for an hour. And then my mom started crying. And Roy and Court had to comfort me while I sat and cried outside.”“Jesus Christ, that’s crazy,” Jason shook his head. “Some people are so disgusting.”“I know. It scarred me for life, trust me,” he rolled his eyes. “Brad teased me every single day for years because of it.”“Teasing? Or bullying? Because there is a fine line between the two,” Jason patted along his cheekbones with a brush. “...I don’t really know. I guess I had to deal with it everyday so it seemed normal after a while,” he closed his eyes to let Jason dust along his forehead. “That’s bullying Danny. And we shouldn’t tolerate people like that,” he exhaled deeply. “It’s a horrible feeling; knowing that there are some things, we don’t have the power to stop. Even though we know it’s wrong and it shouldn’t be happening but...there’s nothing we can do.”“Does Brad still pick on you?”“Yeah, I guess so. Every single day. It’s getting tamer though. Or maybe the pain from it is numbing,” he shook his head. “Sorry for being a Debbie downer for a second there. But I’m serious, it’s not as bad. I don’t think he really has anything more to pick on me for. He probably thought that I was ruining Matt’s reputation, but now that he quit football, it doesn’t matter as much.”“I just wish that those type of people would stop pushing others down,” “But that’s the only way they can remain on top. Why else would they even be up there to begin with?” He harshly pressed a glue stick to his eyebrows. “Ow! Why are you using a glue stick?” Danny flinched. “Because, that’s how you get rid of your brows. I’m going to draw on top of them,” he grinned, pressing down harder. “Trust me. I know exactly what I’m doing.”“You better,” he chuckled. “Okay, bold or subtle eyes?” he ran through a few of his palettes quickly. “Bold everything,” he replied with a wide smile. Jason raised an eyebrow. “Really? It’ll be like...super intense,” “Just how I like it,” Jason shrugged at his answer. “I’ll go with it,” the brush was ever so light and fluffy. He stroked along the top of his eyelids. “Have you talked to Courtney after the whole fiasco?”Danny tensed at the name. “Uhh...I only talked to her on the day. Like straight after but…” he trailed off. “Is she okay? Or is she still mad at me?” Danny halted. He wanted to tell him the truth, really, but he didn’t really know whether he should. The old Danny would’ve stopped there, but he knew better now. “Truth be told, she’s not. She was really upset over it and we had a minor fight because of it,” he confessed, seeing no real reason to lie to him about it. “Do you fight often?”“We don’t fight at all. This must be the first time we have in...a really long time. But I don’t care. I still stand by my actions and I think that she was in the wrong,” he shook his head as Jason parted from his face. “No matter how popular you are, you don’t have the right to tear other people down. Anyways, how are you handling the whole thing?”Jason exhaled. “I don’t really care. I mean, I don’t care about other people’s words, whether they say it to my face or not. I was just scared of what Brad and the rest of them would do because of it. And I really regretted doing the whole thing right after it but,” he snorted. “I don’t fucking care anymore. I can just avoid them probably, and they’re none of my business. I’m just hoping that they don’t hassle me since I’m choosing not to interact with them.” “Do you think they’ll get back at you when we get back to school?” “Hopefully not. You’d think I’d be used to it by now,” he brushed it aside. “Either way, I'm planning to apologise to Courtney. She’s cheer captain and I feel sort of weird if she doesn’t like me. Since I’m a cheerleader and all.”“Don’t do that,” he accidentally came off harsher than he intended. “You don’t have to apologise. I’ve been friends with her for years, and trust me, she sometimes needs to realise that reality isn’t picturesque all the time like what she wants it to be.”“Are you sure?” Danny nodded. “We’re practically best friends. Well we were…” he pursed his lips. “But trust me. She’ll realise she’s wrong eventually. She just takes a while to come to terms with losing.”“If you say so…” as a final touch up, he applied a generous coat of lipstick to his fully plumped lips. He shuffled backwards, easing himself into a position which allowed him to take a look at Danny's whole face. Jason gasped. “This came out really well,” he mumbled, a little in shock. “I’m fucking talented.”“Okay, let me see.”He hopped off the bed and dashed over to a mirror. And there Adore was, looking back at him with a big smile. She was more beautiful than he ever imagined. Big, doey eyes sparkling like they belonged to a dreamer. Long, long eyelashes which just dusted along the bottom of his eyebrows, which were fully coloured with a dark charcoal-like colour. Cheekbones chiseled to perfection. Full, soft lips parted to form a gracious smile. He sort of liked how his hair grew out now. “She looks…” He was taken back. “You look?” Jason placed his hands by his shoulders. “...amazing. More than amazing. More than I can actually describe,” he chuckled in slight denial. “I can’t believe it.”
“Well it’s real,”
Danny couldn't tell whether it was Jason or Adore who said that. But it sent a shiver down his spine anyway. “Umm, I have a few gowns I think you’d fit into. Wanna take a look?”Adore turned around, her face filled with complete joy. Jason opened up his closet, revealing a wide range of gowns hung up. Wigs were placed on top of the shelves below. “You’d look good in a red gown. Like a shapely one,” he flicked through the lot and drew one out. “With an ombré wig,” he turned around to glance at her quickly. “Yeah, definitely.”So he slipped on a wig cap for her, covering the old dark, Danny hair with the new Adore hair which looked like an actual model was shaved for it. “We need to lace you up,” he pulled out a corset. “Or you’ll have a hog body.”“A hog body?” She scoffed. “Yep. A hog body,” Yeah, Adore didn’t really imagine a corset to restrict her so much. She felt the last of her breath basically being squeezed out of her body before she was able to put on her dress and be deemed appropriate for Jason. “Okay, now you’re polished,” he smiled, scanning her up and down one more time. “Maybe I don’t want to be polished,” she pouted, trying to breathe out. “Maybe I’m...polish remover! Yeah, polish remover.”Jason rolled his eyes and laughed. “You are so weird…” he stopped when he didn’t know what to call her. He smirked at that.“Adore. Adore Delano,” it was like she was introducing herself as a completely new person. She felt like a completely new person. “Well,” he gave a light chuckle. “You look amazing Adore. Do you wanna go out? See the world?”She scoffed.“Are you serious? Already?”“Yeah,” he shrugged. “Why not? I’m sure that everyone’s going to gag over this look.”Adore paused, looking at herself one more time in the mirror. Confidence suddenly shot itself through her veins, making her feel more awake and lively.“Sure, why not,” she laughed. “I’d want as many people to see me like this as possible.”“Yeah, we could head down to--”And his phone started to ring in his pocket. He excused himself with a simple gesture before holding it up to his ear.“Hello? Oh hey McCook. You should grab Matt and come down there’s--” he stopped. He gazed at Adore. He then looked down. “...what? Are you being...c-can you slow down a bit I don’t think I can…”And then the device fell from his hand, falling onto the ground, looking like it was collapsing. Adore gently leaned down to pick it up, staring over at Jason with the look of complete confusion.“...hello…?” she chirped worriedly.“Matt! H-He’s fainted! I don’t know if it’s an overdose or something but he’s not moving and I don’t know what to do.”
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
Danny’s legs fidgeted beneath him. His fingers were twitching irritatedly along the armchair and he could feel his heart throb in his ears. His feet were basically running beneath him, going nowhere but feeling like they were. The anticipation ached like hell but he stayed put. He scratched at the skin where he could still feel some foundation left. Max was pacing back and forth, biting his nails by Danny’s foreground. His eyes were roaming intensely like he was trying to focus on every single little detail on the ground. The younger boy wanted to grab his hands and sit him down so he would take at least a single second to breathe.
“We should’ve fucking helped him! I fucking knew this was going to be bad but did we do anything? No! Fucking no because we’re fucking pussies and-!”
It’s 10pm and the hospital is darkly lit and completely empty. Matt’s whole family is out at his older sister’s graduation so they’re not even in the state. So there’s them, sitting through Jason's echoing rant, brushing away thoughts of sleep, and being the family he needs.
“I want to stab every single fucking person here right now because we did nothing to help!”
Jason screams when he’s upset. He turns everything into anger and starts to burn from the inside out. Until his lungs give out and he takes one last huff. That huff hasn’t come yet. And Danny doubts it’s coming anytime soon. “Jason, we’re honestly all so upset by this but it’s too late,” Max whispered huskily. “Jason’s right. We talked about it. We knew what was going on and we did nothing. This is basically our fault,” Kurtis mumbled, his head knocked down completely. His locks shaded his view. “I wouldn’t say it’s our fault necessarily. His problem was caused by many different factors,” Max tried to keep a straight tone. “I just want Matt to be okay,” Jason collapsed into his lap, hands over his face and his chest fallen.
“We all do,”
Brian F came rushing in, his body cloaked with a loose hoodie. As he pulled it down, Danny saw how sunken in his eyes were. “I came here as fast as I could after McCook called me. Do we know how Matt is?”“He’s still passed out as far as we know,” Kurtis informed, at first strongly, but soon melting into a sense of guilt and worry as he wrapped his arms around him and pulled him into an embrace. “I’m glad you’re here.”“He’s still in there fighting. And I think we just need to wait until he’s ready,” Danny muttered, mustering up the remaining bits of confidence he had to say something that was much needed. He felt Max’s head fall onto his shoulder for support. “... do you think he’s going to be alright…?” Max whispered over to him, sounding helpless. “I believe in him,”It took hours and hours of waiting. Max was sleeping soundly by his side, his head still resting on his shoulder and now, his hand resting by his lap. And Kurtis was fast asleep by his other side, lying on top of a few of the seats. His head was resting on Brian’s lap, who was already asleep, with his head knocked back.Danny was barely awake but he was trying to stay up as much as possible...even though his eyes were closing every second he wasn’t paying attention. The clock struck 12 at that moment, and he could feel his hands going numb.Jason somehow seemed wide awake. Still tapping his feet and rubbing his hands together. Danny would have loved to go over and comfort him, if he could actually get out without disturbing Max that is.Suddenly, the door creaked open. A slim figure walked through the light to enter the dark. Danny quickly shook everyone awake, regaining a little more consciousness as he watched the doctor approach them.“You’d all be happy to know that Matt’s awake now,” he informed, pushing up his glasses. “Just regained consciousness. Now, do you know if his family is available?”Everyone gave a heavy sigh of relief. “They’re currently off at another state,” Max answered formally, rubbing his eyes and containing a yawn. “I see…” he cleared his throat. “Do you have their details?”“Umm yes, of course,” he pulled out his phone, looking through his contacts, his eyes blinking away sleep. Before he could mutter the first few digits of their number, Jason interrupted, his voice cracked and his stance broken.
“Can we go see Matt?”
The doctor looked towards him.“I don’t know if he’s fully comfortable. He just woke up and--”“Trust me, I know him hell of a lot better than anyone else on earth. I know what he needs when he wakes up,” he came off firm, maybe too firm, and the older man seemed to be a little taken aback by his words. He exchanged a quick glance with Max, probably assuming that he was the most mature member, and the teenager gave him a small nod. “Make sure not to disturb him. He’s still incredibly tired.”And with that simple comment, he dashed off, gently closing the door behind him. It must have been half an hour from there when they were allowed to go see him. One by one. It went from Jason, to Max, to Brian, to Kurtis and then Danny. Each session got shorter and shorter. It was bittersweet. Danny was exhausted, but he was glad to see him. He was happy to know that he was okay. Not as okay as he wanted him to be but...okay. Fine. But the way he looked in that bed made him think otherwise. He looked frail and pale, like his breaths weren’t properly circulating through his lungs. His eyes were mostly thinned out, making him wonder if he really was awake. “Lucky last,” he painfully choked out a laugh. “Danny Noriega. How are you?”“I’ve been better…” he thought it but didn’t say it. “More importantly, how are you?” he took a seat by a chair messily positioned by his bedside. It looked like Kurtis kicked it aside when he presumably stormed out. “Eh, I could be doing better,” he chuckled. It made Danny feel nauseous. Stop acting like everything is okay when it’s not. “I’m happy you’re not screaming at me though.”“What?”“I-It’s all overwhelming you know...and it doesn't make it any better when all your best friends come in, crying and shouting at you for your stupid mistake,” his head collapsed to its side to face him. “Max crying has always been my least favourite thing in the world. The way he looks is just so…” he paused to swallow. “And Kurtis frustrated makes everything more real. And Brian upset,” he snickered forcefully. “I haven’t seen that in so long,” he stopped when he got to Jason. “...I don’t want to keep ruining things like this with Jason. I accidentally ruin everything with him. All the time.”“That’s not true Matt,” Danny tried to console him. “He loves you. You know that.”“I know. Of course I know that. That’s the problem,” his voice cracked. “He deserves the world, and right now, I’m ruining his world. That’s the last thing I want.”“I don’t think it’s necessarily you who’s ruining it,” he lightly creased his brows. “He’s just worried sick about you. I-It’s you ruining your own world that’s destroying his...if that makes sense.”Matt’s facial expression seemed to falter a tad at the comment. And then he thinned out his lips and gave a sigh.“That’s true…” it was a simple statement, but it meant a lot to Danny; the fact that he knew that he was in the wrong.There was another pregnant pause. “You just gave me a lot of time to think Danny,” Matt grinned slightly. “I like that about you,” he shuffled to reposition himself to sit up a tad. “I’m trying. I really am. But it’s really hard to get through this all, you know?”“Yeah, I get it,” he nodded.“And I guess, to this day, I can’t really fully admit that I have a problem. That I have an addiction…? I suppose,”“First step is admitting you have a problem,” he clasped his hands together. “And Jason’s counting on you to do the right thing. He loves you so much, you know? If you’re not going to do this for yourself, do it for him.”The older boy exhaled looking elsewhere to wrap his head around the situation. And Danny gave him the space he needed to do so. “I needed to hear that,” he confessed, tucking his chin towards his chest. “Thanks Danny.”“Have a good rest, okay? We’re all going to give you as much time as you need to feel better again,” he gave him one last smile before rising from his chair and heading towards the door. “W-Wait Danny,” the younger boy’s hand wrapped around the knob. “...can you tell Jason not to worry about me so much? That I’m slowly recovering and he has nothing to worry about?”“Sure thing.”And with that, he opened the door to let himself through.
Sorry Matt.
He swallowed and headed back to the rest of his group, who were all sitting around, the mix of relief and worry staining the air.
I can’t lie to him like that.
“Are you ready to go?” Kurtis asked, his words quieter than usual. He zipped up his jacket and exchanged a look with the younger boy. “Yeah, yeah. Matt needs some space, I think.”And they headed over to his car, took their vaguely familiar spots, but with Brian replacing Matt, and Kurtis slowly drove home, the atmosphere not thinning out like they all hoped.
You're gonna thank me later.
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
Danny was in an odd situation of being tired, but being so tired that he felt awake. Like he was so beyond the feeling of exhaust, that his body seemed to just adjust itself so he felt...normal? But knowing he’s not actually fully awake.And Max was over at his house, sort of going through that same phase. It was because he lied to his parents about going to a sleepover to see Matt. And Danny’s mom didn't mind that much. Sh giggled it off…? Danny laughed at the thought actually. Max volunteered to cook them a meal early in the morning. And Danny was admittedly hungry so he was thankful. It was 3am and it wasn’t the best time to eat but, fuck it. And Max was also totally fine with sharing Danny’s bed. Again…? He wished Roy was like that. Either way, Max was an incredibly pleasant friend to have around.“I didn’t know you liked spicy food Danny,” they were sat in Danny’s back porch, which the younger boy never went to anymore. It was nice out there though, especially at night. Or morning…?“I like anything spicy,” he said it in a teasing tone. “And I didn’t know you cooked so much.”“I mean, I don’t want people to hassle over what I eat, so it’s easier if I just do it myself, so I don’t bother them I guess,” he shrugged. “And plus, it’s a useful skill and I mildly enjoy it,” he looked down at the brunette’s plate. “Already done?”“Yep,” he licked his lips, wiping off the excess. Max chuckled.“Wow you’re a fast eater,” he exhaled. “...Matt was too…”Danny parted his lips slightly at the comment. He’s not going to lie, he couldn't get Matt out of his mind either. At all. Obviously. That was probably to be expected after that but... “How was it…?” he lowered his bowl into his lap. “You know, talking to him and all that?”Max sighed.“It was…” he took a deep breath and thought for a moment. “...very confronting. Very real...I suppose. It’s like brutal truth. Barbarous truth. And it’s something I really hate…” he wrinkled his brows. “I don’t think I was ready for that. And I don’t think I’ll ever be ready for something like that.”“I’m worried about him,” Danny watched him shift back and give a cracked sigh.“Me too. Completely and utterly,” Max dropped his bowl down to the ground. “We’ve been friends for so long. He was the only person who had my back for most of my life. And I love all of you guys so much but…Matt’s just so important to me. He’s someone I can never ever replace in my life. You know? His presence is irreplaceable.”“I get you,” he noted. “I was basically like that with Roy. We’re childhood friends and, everyone hated me except him. No matter what happened. He still looked out for me.”“That was the literal definition of my schooling life,” he laughed. “It was me and Matt for so long. With Matt being one of the only good things in my life,” he paused. “...I kind of liked him. You know. Like that.”Danny tried to stop himself from scoffing right in front of him. He never expected him to confess something like that. And the younger boy’s heart literally jumped when he said it.“For a while…” he sighed into his chest. “It hurt a lot to have those feelings build up. Every single day. Every single moment of school,” he shook his head. “Maybe that’s why I hated Jason at first...because he was taking away the only person that liked me for me. And I loved him because of it…”The younger boy had so many questions within his mind tumbling on top of each other. He wanted to ask all of them but he stopped. And he breathed. And then he asked a singular one.“What did you like about him?” he wanted to cheer him up a tad. And he was hoping that this question would help. But then again, he was a tad scared that he was going to miss him even more.“Well...I don’t know,” he flustered up a bit. “He has really amazing eyes. That was cliche. B-But, you know? I really liked them. They drew me in every time.”“What else?” Danny watched his eyes float upwards and towards the sky, like he was dreaming.“He has a really calm personality. It’s kind of aloof, but I like how soothing it is. It’s just so...refreshing to hear his thoughts and opinions. It’s something that’s never been apart of me. It compliments my nervous and hardworking personality. If that makes sense…”“Yeah, I get that completely,” he nodded. “He’s just...cool. I get that.”“But sometimes his point of view is a little childish. Naive. It’s kind of cute actually,” he leaned back to press against the chair. “It’s kind of like you.”Danny widened his eyes, feeling the atmosphere grow quiet for a moment.Max slowly turned his gaze over to the younger boy, feeling that high of rejuvenation from the night air. He breathed it in one last time, his lungs feeling cold inside his burning body. He watched Danny’s appearance melt. His dark locks lightening until it became a light brown. It was then cut short, just by his ears. And his complexion grew a tad darker but his rosy cheeks stayed the same. The same pallet of red. And his usual eyes brightened a tad, becoming more thin but just as luminous. And then the boy was sitting in front of him. Looking both nostalgic and new, but still amazing in every way possible. He couldn't help it. With one quick gulp of the intoxicating air, he lunged forward, feeling the other boy dissolve within his own trapping embrace. And he felt his eyes close, the moment soaking into his skin. His lips were soft. Softer than what he would have ever imagined. There was a bit of a spicy taste left lingering, which bounced off his tongue playfully. And when he parted, he saw Danny again, his eyes circular once again and now, fully stretched out with surprise. Max didn’t even realise what he had done until the moment’s high washed away and he was left, gripping onto his shoulders somewhat firmly.“Oh my god I’m so--”Before he could finish his sentence, Danny had smiled. Genuinely smiled. And it made all the words which were tangled in his chest unknot. “It’s okay,” he reassured, somehow brushing it off with ease. The older boy stuttered for what to say next. “I kinda liked it,” he patted his lips to dry them. “I mean, who wouldn’t want to kiss me, right?”He chuckled. A truthful sort of chortle. “You’re starting to sound like Kurtis. Stop it,” he snorted, the air replacing itself with a much more, domestic, nice vibe. “I’m just saying,” he grinned, coughing. “You’re not too bad either…”Max choked on his own air.“D-Danny, don’t say that--!” he tried to scream it but it completely dissolved into laughter.“What? I’m telling the truth!” And they laughed in their shared bed, leaving Max to still feel comfortable by his side. And maybe it wasn’t anything. Maybe this wasn’t really as romantic as Jason and Matt, and it wasn’t going to be some amazing gay power couple, but it was nice. Pleasant. The older boy thought that as he leaned over to Danny and hugged him while he slept.And the younger boy traced over his lips one more time before he fell asleep. He never expected his first kiss to be like that. But he likes surprises.
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
“Brian? What are you doing here?”
Brian Firkus. He’s a person that goes after what he wants. He doesn't exactly know what he wants sometimes, but he does dive head first into any opportunity when he finds one. And well, this isn’t something he’d dub as an “opportunity”, but it’s something he knows he wants to do. And he’s gonna do it. “I came back home to see you,”And that's what he wants. To help, to be with, and protect Brian McCook.
He just won’t admit the fact that he needs help though.
“I just wanted to stay home today, I guess,” Brian let himself into the familiar house, going to the lounge room like he usually did. McCook’s house was never that clean, and he learnt to accept that after living there for a bit. Clothes were thrown everywhere and there were dirty plates lying around. He wondered where the heck his parents were. Maybe they’re trying to give him space right now. Trying to make him feel better because of what happened with Matt. And he’s not exactly healthy either, as of now. But it made Firkus even more uncomfortable because they weren't there. There wasn't anyone else that could be there to look after him. “Umm...what about school?” he hurried to his side, taking a seat next to him in slight uncomfort. “I have straight A’s and the rest of the grade are all idiots. I’m pretty sure that I can miss one day,” he reasoned, taking off his jacket. “But you left this morning to go. What made you turn back?” he started to put away his plates. Something he would do to keep himself preoccupied. “I realised that school didn’t need me and you needed me a lot more,” he joined his side in the kitchen, stopping the other boy in his tracks, having a handful of dirty plates himself. “I-I don’t need help, really,” he shook his head, taking the plates from his hands. “I just need to rest a bit. Let my thoughts come back and my appetite.”He laughed. Brian Firkus didn’t like that though. And he knew exactly what he likes and what he doesn't like.“Okay, well you’re already failing at the whole “resting” thing,” he grabbed his hand, leading him back into the lounge room and gently laying him down. “Where do you keep your blankets again?”“In the top draw of the cabinet,” he gave in, sighing to himself. “You don’t need to do this.”“But I do, that’s the thing,” he smiled, spreading the thick fabric over his body. “Okay, so what do you want to watch? I’m not a big fan of Contact, but I’ll make an exception today.”“...I don’t really want to watch anything to be honest…” he muttered into the sheets. “Do you need something to eat then? Drink?”“I don’t need help. I’m okay,” he tried to push the sheets away from him, but the younger boy quickly grabbed it and shoved him back down. “Can’t you just go back to school? You’re going to go nowhere in life if you don’t get an education.”He joked, laughing once again at his own comment. Firkus let himself smile a little at it though. He kind of liked it when he did that. Joked around. But he would never admit that to McCook. Because that giggle he does when he's happy killed him on the inside. In the best way possible.“Shut up and let me take care of you. I’m being nice for once so accept it,” he rolled his eyes. “I might have to stay home for a week depending on how you feel.”“I’m not the one who had to be taken to hospital,” he glanced aside. Matt. That's the last person Brian Firkus would like to think of. “Maybe you should check up on him.”“But you were getting fucked with him before it,” he gently ran his thumb across his forehead, checking his temperature. A tad less hot than before. “What was it, anyway?”“...meth,” the brunette didn’t seem to be able to look at him straight in the eyes. “You told me you quit,” he said quietly. “We both did. It was originally gonna be coke but--”Brian sometimes forgot that his body reacted automatically when he got upset. And he sometimes zones out when it happens. So when he opened his eyes again, that’s when he realised that he had slapped him across the face, forcing his face back. Like his face was completely knocked aside. His voice hitched at that moment. “Oh my god,” he lunged towards him, cupping his hands by his cheeks. “I’m so sorry, I didn’t-”“No, I deserved that,” after a moment, he piped out a small chuckle. “It made me feel more alive. If that makes sense…” he trailed off. The brunette snickered achingly, covering his face with his hand. It was nasally and painful, but he couldn't actually stop. “What?”“I-I can’t believe it,” he laughed. “I am such a bad friend. What the fuck was I doing for the past few years? Was I just sitting around just watching you destroy yourself?”“I-It’s not that bad. Come on,” he sat up, holding up his chin. “Don’t say that. I fucking hate it when you look sad.”“I don’t think I can stand to see this anymore…” he ran his fingers through his hair. “I’m sorry. I’m really sorry for putting you through this,” his gaze softened. “I-I just thought…” he shrugged. “I always thought that I’d rather be known as the creepy weird kid than being known as the gay kid. You know? Royally fucked and drug addict...not fag.”“But it’s another thing when you’re ruining your body,” he inched his hands towards his lap. “I know it sucks here and I know you want to get out, but at this point, you’re not going to fucking get out. And I don’t want to see that. Because I see you graduating, getting out of this shit hole and living a life you want to. So don’t fucking ruin this for yourself before any of these amazing things happen. You have the rest of your life to live. Don’t let it fall short.”There was silence for a moment, until the other Brian’s lips fully curled down and he began to weep into his hands. Until his lungs gave out and he broke down into his lap. The brunette cradled him, feeling his cries muffle against his stomach.“I hate myself. I hate my life. And I really hate where I’m going,” he sobbed. “...is that normal? Feeling like you’re going nowhere?”“Yeah, it happens to people sometimes. I’ve been there,” he admitted. “But life hasn’t even properly started yet. This is like the “prologue” of our life, essentially, right? We haven’t even graduated yet. You can’t say you hate yourself when you haven’t even grown into your full self.”“I...I guess so,” he coughed.“But I don’t care what stage of your life you are. I’m still gonna care about you. And this isn’t okay with me,” he confessed firmly. “I’m gonna love you for you until you learnt to love yourself. Got that?”The older boy gave a wheezy cackle through that thick fog of cries. “I’m never gonna learnt to love myself just so you can love me,” he laughed, snuggling a little closer to him. He exhaled into his neck and plopped his cheek onto his shoulder. The younger Brian felt his body shift its weight onto him. “...I don’t want to die. I don’t want to go down the path I’m going down.”“I’m not going to let you.”And they lay there together for the rest of the day and then till the middle of night. They binge watched movies that the blonde mostly wanted, but Firkus was fine with that. Okay, admittedly he didn't love all his movie choices, but he was okay. He glanced down at him, who was curled up against his chest, lazily yawning as he flicked the TV off. "Are you tired?" he asked, pouting a tad when he watched the younger boy rub his eyes."No," he lied. "You?""No," he lied back, smiling a little. "I wanna sleep here.""Okay, we can sleep here then," he smiled, barely opening his eyes. He shuffled down, finding a comfortable spot where Brian McCook could also lie next to him. They exchanged small grins. "I'm not sleeping until you kiss me," he blurted out, feeling a little stunned himself from the confession. The younger boy laughed. "Fine," and they gave each other a small peck. One that was both casual and romantic. Somehow at once. "...I'm not sleeping until you make out with me,""Go to sleep Brian."
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
“Yeah, sorry to invite you over so suddenly Danny. I just wanted to quickly run over your lines and songs and all that,”
“Dude, I live next door. It’s fine.”
Danny plopped down on Roy’s familiar bed, script in hand. He hadn’t, admittedly ran over his lines all too much, but Danny was a master bullshitter, according to himself. So that meant that he was good...? Maybe.
“How are your lines coming along?” The older boy asked, pulling out a chair. Danny gave a nervous chuckle.
“...fine,” he coughed. Roy shot him a look of doubt before laughing.
“I know you Danny. And I know that you’re bad at remembering lines sometimes,”
“Not true! That’s so rude,” he whined playfully.
“Okay, what about the song? You know, “Freeze your Brain”?” He questioned, looking over his notes in his book.
“I’ve listened to it almost everyday. And I know all the words now,” he beamed, hoping Roy would fall for that charm of his. And it worked. The older boy believed him in an instant and checked it off his list.
“Good job Danny. I knew you’d remember the song,” he nodded.
The younger boy eased into a more comfortable position, a little more relieved. He wasn't technically lying, but the whole "listening to it everyday" thing was a little bit of a hyperbole.
“But why didn’t you just text me? I mean, I don’t care that much since I live next door, but still,” he lay stomach-down on top of his bed.
“Because,” he closed the book. “I wanted to see you,” Danny’s heart skipped a beat. “I haven’t caught up with you in a while and I wanted to see how school was going.”
Danny raised an eyebrow, but quickly brushed it off.
“Aw thanks Roy,” he gave a toothy grin. “I’ve been fine though. I mean, classes are a trek and I don’t like going to most of them. And my teachers are rude. But I like lunch. I like my friends.”
Roy nodded along with his words.
“That’s good. I’m glad you finally found your people,” he sat next to him. “Because I hate Gia and Jay and I can’t believe you hung out with them.”
Danny bursted out into laughter.
“Bitch, why didn’t you tell me earlier?! I would’ve left if you hated them too!” He groaned. “I thought it was just me!”
“Bitch, I did tell you. And you said that you couldn’t find anyone else,” Danny’s laughter settled a little. “Why didn’t you just hang out with me instead?”
“I felt like I couldn’t be with seniors…” he muttered. “...until I actually sat with seniors and realised how fun it was.”
“Well I’m happy you found your people,” he grinned. “It’s good to see you actually happy to go out and do stuff, you know? It’s been a while.”
“B-But it doesn’t beat hanging out with you and Court,” he butted in, feeling unsatisfied with Roy’s expression. “I miss that the most…”
“I miss that too,” he confessed, exhaling. “I think I want everything to be simple again. I guess I don’t want to grow up,” his eyes glanced over the outside world. “Or at least, become an adult in a place like this.”
Danny pursed his lips.
“A-Are you going to leave? After you graduate?” He asked, trying to regain his attention. But Roy seemed faraway mentally. And sooner or later, he was going to be faraway physically. Danny hated the thought of it. He had always hated the thought of it. It was something that he was starting to consider even in middle school, but the closer they approach Roy’s graduation, the more he felt nauseous just thinking about it.
“Maybe. Probably,” he shrugged. “The closer I get to graduation, the more I want to actually just go away. For a bit? Maybe a long while,” he sighed. “I don’t know what it’ll be like but…” he looked over to Danny, who already had his head down and back hunched. He didn't want him to continue. Because if he continued, it meant that he was serious about this. It meant that he had it planned out. And Roy commits to things like this. “Maybe the city? You’ve gone to the city for the long weekend right?” He chuckled. “Tell me. Was it a nice place?” He received no reply. He edged a little closer and raised his gaze. “Was it?”
“C-Can you stop talking about this now?”
Their eyes met, linking together perfectly for a second before Danny blushed and glanced away.
“I don’t really like all this talk about the future,” he shook his head. “I never have. I never fucking have.”
Roy’s eyes softened.
“Are you okay?”
“You guys don’t understand how hard it is to be the youngest friend,” he shouted, coming off louder than he expected. “It always happens. It happened with you and Courtney during middle school, and high school, and now life!”
“W-What are you talking about?”
“You leave me behind!” He sniffed. “...I know you can’t help it, but it hurts. It feels like I’m getting abandoned…”
“But Danny, it’s not like that,” Roy tried to reassure, placing a hand gently by his shoulder.
“But it feels like it,” he looked towards him, his stare a little foggy. “Have you ever bothered to think about how I feel? It’s not a movie. It doesn’t just stop after you graduate. It still keeps going on for me. With people I don’t like, with more priorities I need to deal with.”
The older boy wrapped his arms around him, drawing him into a tight embrace. That’s when Danny felt his heart completely break, making him cry into his shoulder. It was relieving. Painful, but relieving. And the way Roy's clothes folded against his almost trembling body would never get old.
“I’m so so sorry,” he ran his hands through his hair. “It was selfish of me to do,” he tried to shoosh his cries by soothingly running his fingers over the back of his neck. It’s what he used to do often when they were younger. “I didn’t know you were so upset about it, but maybe I was just being self centred and stupid.”
“Y-You weren’t being…” He hiccuped, not being able to fully say the words.
“I’m sorry that you always had to have the burden of being left behind like that…” he spoke softly.
“But it’s not like I ever forgot about you. Trust me,” he parted to smile towards him warmly.
“You’re always on my mind, Okay? If you weren’t, well, I wouldn’t have asked you to be in this musical. Or come over tonight,” he wiped a tear as it swerved around his cheeks.
“Maybe you should stay over at mine tonight?” Danny widened his eyes, taking in a quick inhale.
“A-Are you sure? I mean we have school tomorrow and--”
“Danny you live next door,” he hopped off the bed and reached down to grab his hand. “We can go over now, get your stuff for tonight and tomorrow, and you can stay with me tonight. Like old times.”
Danny smiled widely, his mind not being able to properly wrap itself around the actual situation. He sort of just looked up at him, dumbfounded but incredibly happy, as he accepted his offer and they walked back to his for a few minutes.
It was an oddly nostalgic feeling; having Roy look after him like this again. It felt...right. Like it was supposed to be.
He felt like the 5 year old Danny again, going to his first sleepover with Roy. And the older boy had taken his hand to guide him home, because the youngest boy was so scared of going out of his house alone, even to the house next door. And Roy made him feel better by supporting him through it. Them, together, always felt like it was meant to be. For him anyway.
“I’m sorry my sleeping bag doesn't fit me anymore,” he could feel his tears already drying by his cheeks. Roy gestured reassurance.
“Eh, it’s okay. I figured it wouldn’t. I mean, how long has it been now?” he let out a small snicker. “I mean, we could share a bed maybe?” Danny widened his eyes further than he thought possible. But Roy seemed so nonchalant about it, just moving around a few of his stuff around the room. “If not, then I guess you can crash on the sofa and--”
“No, no, I’m cool with that. Cool,” he hurried to answer, sounding like a complete idiot in the process. Roy just laughed again.
“Okay then,” he put down the load of Danny’s stuff that he was holding onto his desk. “At least you’re not one of those idiots who scream “gay!” when I say that. Some people, right?” He rolled his eyes. “It’s not like you’re gonna wake up with my dick in your mouth.”
I wish I did.
“Yeah totally,” he chortled along.
“You’ve always been so cool with me,” he exhaled happily. “I honestly ask myself why we don’t hang out more often,” before Danny could fully think of an answer (which he already knew was going to be cliche and stupid anyway), Roy continued. “Maybe studies?” he laughed. “Not that you would. Let’s be honest.”
“Shut up!” he chuckled. “I have been taking my studies more seriously! I passed the latest science test, you know?”
“And what was the average?” he sat on his bed, looking over at him amusingly.
“...85%...” he whispered.
“And what did you get?”
“...63%...” Roy cackled.
“Wow, look at you improving,” Danny slumped down beside him.
“Shut up! I don’t even need science for what I want to be,”
“And what do you want to be?”
Danny stopped. And looked up at him. And then sort of froze.
Had he...thought about that? Properly yet? It was probably stupid that he hadn’t at his age but he really hadn’t. Like, at all recently.
“That’s okay. Most people haven’t figured out what they want to do,” he shrugged. “Mine’s really rough. I say I’m going to the city, but let’s be honest, who knows where I’ll be after college.”
Danny was the type of person who liked to focus on the present. He wasn’t always like this. As a child, he liked to think of the future. All the possibilities of the future. Because there seemed to be hope for absolutely anything to happen and he loved that. But now, as a junior in high school, his possibilities seemed shortened, so he just stopped thinking. He stopped dreaming. Because he already knew his dreams would be crushed. But now that his future is coming much too soon, he had to think about it. There was no other choice.
“Are you going to the college around town?” Danny sort of hesitantly asked. He was admittedly scared for the answer. Yes, then well, he would most likely be moving anyway to the city later on anyway, realising how boring it is around here. Or no...he’s moving. He’ll be gone.
When he paused to take a breath, Danny didn’t even need to hear it.
“I was scared of you asking me that,” he chuckled. That chuckle he gave when he’s actually quite frightened of what’s to come.
“Is that why you asked me to come over?” he muttered.
“Not necessarily. I did want to see you,” he crossed his legs and swung himself around to face him. “But it was mostly to spend time with you before I left…”
“Y-You’re joking right? Where is this college?”
“I mean I applied for one near the city but…” he coughed. Danny breathed out heavily. “Danny don’t think about it like that. I’m not leaving you. I’m just going on with my life. You need to understand that.”
“I know but,”
For a moment, he closed his eyes. Took in deep breaths so his head didn’t feel so lightheaded anymore. And so his fists wouldn’t tremble with this confusing state of frustration but sadness. And when he opened them up again, he saw Roy frown at him through his somewhat misty gaze.
“Yeah, yeah I get it,” he sniffed. “I’m so happy for you.”
Roy exhaled into a gentle smile.
“Thanks Danny,” he roughed up his hair a little bit. “But that’s why I sort of wanted to ask what you wanted to be when you were older.”
Danny raised an eyebrow.
“Why does that matter?”
The older boy exhaled and rolled his eyes.
“Okay, this is going to sound incredibly stupid but-”
“No, no, tell me,” the anticipation made him feel a little excited.
“I was wondering if you wanted to come out to the city with me…” the younger boy nearly choked. “...maybe…” a subtle blush brushed along his cheeks, making Danny burn on the inside. Shit. “It depends on what you wanted to be right? I mean I figured something like musician or something like that for you so-”
“No I want to!” he hassled to answer. His heartbeat was uncountable and sweat dripped down from his forehead nervously. Roy was a little taken aback by his answer. “I mean,” he rubbed the back of his neck. “Yeah, that sounds...nice…”
“Obviously I’m not expecting you to. It means dropping out of school, and abandoning your life here, and leaving your friends, and-”
“I’m considering it,” Roy stared over at him, and then melted into a giggle and a look of denial.
“I will never understand how your head works,” he snickered. “You have always been so spontaneous and fun. It’s something I lack in my usual day-to-day life.”
Flattery made Danny feel like he could fly. That tingly feeling that rushed through his body made him feel like he would collapse. In the best way possible. Roy was looking towards him with that grin he does when he’s truly happy. And it made him feel like he was truly happy. Ah fuck. He’s so happy. He couldn't help but to just beam back at him. He fought himself internally, trying to force his body not to move whatsoever.
Roy plunged down onto his bed so his back was resting against his sheets. He then looked up at Danny. Okay, did he look good in every angle? Because Danny wasn’t okay with this fact.
“Do you remember how I said you were my childhood?” he began.
At the annual ball. That night. After Courtney. Of course he remembered. He remembered how the air even felt that night. He remembered everything.
“Yeah…” he filtered it all down into one mumble.
“Well, maybe you’re my future too,”
That meant a lot of things to Danny. Endless, endless things to Danny. Like, so many possibilities streamed through his mind.
“Either way I know you’re a really important person in my life,” he looked towards him and ran his thumb over his knees. Danny froze under his touch. Do straight guys often do this? If that’s the case, he really needed to find more straight friends. “And you’re always gonna be.”
“You too…” he breathed out, his mind trying to grasp the current reality. “You’ll always be my favourite person ever,” the older brunette laughed. “Ever and ever.”
“Okay,” he gave him one last smile before yawning. “It’s getting late and we should probably go to sleep.”
Danny pouted.
“But I’m old enough to stay up,” he whined childishly.
“We still have school tomorrow,” he groaned. “Yay,” Sarcasm suited him. “What do you have first period?”
“Maths,” he moaned. “Great. You?”
“English,” he smirked. “Not much better.”
He shuffled underneath the covers. Danny had to confess something. He had slept in the same bed as guys before, obviously. He slept with Max all the time...not like that. But Roy was different. It was somehow nervously exciting but...inviting…? It sort of sucked to think of him like that, in a way, because I guess, this feeling meant that Danny really did feel something for Roy. It meant he really had an undying feeling in his chest that made him still feel thrilled when Roy gave him a charming line or a cute look. Why was he like that? Crushes sounded stupid, but love makes it sound too real.
He was now lying next to him, too close for comfort. But that was because at this rate, Roy could probably feel Danny’s heart beating much too quickly and that made him even more nervous to think about.
He gulped.
“Are you cold? Hot? Just right?” Roy gazed at him.
This couldn't be real. Danny had to be dreaming. He had to be.
“I-I’m fine. Yeah thanks,” he closed his eyes to avoid eye contact. Are childhood friends still supposed to be this socially awkward? Admittedly, Danny did like the rush it gave him. Just a little bit. A very slight bit.
You know, Roy hadn’t changed much if Danny thought about it. The way he softly snored. He was never the type to move that much during his sleep, just from one side to the other in the middle of the night. Danny felt him shift closer a tad. He should’ve slept by then. He really should’ve but he couldn't. At all.
Glancing up, he saw Roy’s calm expression. It melted his heart just watching him, with his eyes closed and lips parted just a tad. He snuggled up to him just a little (barely noticeable, he hoped) and bit down on his lip to contain his smile.
Danny missed him too much.
He realised something that night. There was something about Roy that made him feel amazing. And no one else could replace him like that. Max was a living, breathing example of that. They've shared the same bed, they've spent countless hours together, and heck, they've kissed, which is something Roy and Danny haven't done (yet). But Danny never felt so excited to see Max. Or anxious whenever he looked nervous. Or truly, truly happy when he said something nice to him. Because Roy understood him. And he understood Roy. And they had this connection that no one else could have. It was irreplaceable, and absolutely perfect for Danny. It wouldn't matter how many years went by, because he knew that they have something, in some shape or form. And that meant the world to him.
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
“Do you usually drive to school?” Danny asked, zipping up his hoodie. Roy laughed and checked himself in the mirror of his car.“Nope. But somebody slept in so we’re in a bit of a hurry,” he chuckled.Danny usually doesn't sleep well in other people’s beds, but surprisingly, that wasn’t the problem for him last night. It was the fact that he was too comfortable. If that made sense. He didn’t really want to...ruin it? Waste it. All that cliche stuff that Danny would never want to admit to. So he was completely exhausted by the morning. But Roy helped him through it with a nice cup of coffee and a nice breakfast. It was weird to see his parents again for the first time in years. They were as uptight as he remembered. He always wondered how someone like Roy could stem from parents like that. But they were the most typical type of people you saw around the area. “What class do you have first?” Roy asked, pulling up to their already fairly populated school.“English, probably,” he rolled his eyes. “Fuck my teacher.”“Miss Mitchell?” the younger brunette nodded and groaned. “Yeah, she’s a bitch.”They hop out of the car, Danny reluctantly closing the door behind him. The real question was, how long was it going to be until he saw Roy again? Hung out with him again? Because it had been years until last night.
“Oh hey Danny,”
Damn it Kurtis.“Hey Roy,” he sort of leaped over to him primly and stretched out a grin on top of his real expression, which was a smirk. A really excited and mischievous smirk. “What are you guys doing?”
Stop ruining this for me.
“Oh uhh…” Danny cleared his throat.“We hung out last night,” Roy explained casually. “Anyways, I actually need to check up with Sharon about her lines quickly. I’ll see you later, okay?”"O-Okay,"And he headed off, leaving Danny with a feeling of annoyance and regret. The moment Roy disappeared from his sight, he glared towards Kurtis, who shrugged it off jokingly.“What?”“Really?” he rolled his eyes.“Were you having a moment? I didn’t notice,” he sneered. “Leave him alone Kurtis,” Max warned lightheartedly, slapping him on the shoulder.“What? I’m just having fun,” he pouted, as they entered their school building. Danny noticed something really odd. It was much easier to walk in a straight line when there’s only three people. Trying to oddly fit five people was always a trek but...it was sort of sad. Knowing that Jason wasn’t okay and Matt certainly wasn't.“Where’s Jason?” Danny asked, leaning against the lockers as he watched Max unlock it.“I went to his house today in the morning and apparently he’s sick,” Kurtis said. “Like vomiting, according to his parents.”“I’m planning to go over to his house this afternoon,” Max grinned to himself like he was a tad confident in his planning. “I’ve done it plenty of times before and I know how to make vegetable soup perfectly so he loves it.”“But I don’t think he’s sick like that…” the tallest boy’s smile grew quiet.“I wish I could do something to make him feel better,” Danny sighed.“Well…” the brunette began. “There is something but…”“What is it?” he chirped. “Jason wants to quit cheerleading,” Kurtis explained. “He sees no point in doing it anymore since Matt quit football,” Max closed his locker and they began walking down the hall again. “So maybe you could give a heads up to Courtney?”Danny gulped.“S-Sure,” he plastered on a smile. “Great,” he beamed. “He’ll appreciate it. Trust me.”At this point, Danny would basically do anything to make Jason feel better and...well if this would really make him feel better than he guessed that he’d do it. Even though that meant confrontation with the childhood bestie that he made cry over the most intense fight they ever had. But you know, it’s okay.So he went to the basically dead oval at the end of school. He saw Courtney, her hands on her hips, standing in front of her squad, nodding along with Alaska’s quick and sharp counting. Danny hadn’t seen them perform this properly for a while. He was pretty sure that they had a competition coming up. Maybe...? He’s sure that Courtney told him about it somewhat recently.He didn't want to disturb it. You know, it was important and all that. So he waited until they took their final position to then run up to Courtney and lightly tap her shoulder to get her attention. She basically whipped her pony around, eyed him sharply, then breathed down on him until he shivered.“Hey Court?” his throat was dry. “C-Can I talk to you quickly?”She turned around and glanced over her team once again.“Take five,” she shouted. Danny watched the human pyramid dissolve into nothingness as he turned his stare over to the blonde again. “What do you want?”Danny doesn't like the way Courtney sounded when she was mad. She always sounded like the biggest bitch. Those typical high school bitches. And he knew that Courtney wasn't really like that. “Umm…it’s just about Jason,” he whispered, somewhat unconsciously. “He wants to quit.”“Oh…” she pursed her lips. “Okay. I’ll tell the coach,” she nodded to herself. “Is that all?”Danny paused. This meant that Courtney wanted to hear something. Something very specific. Unlike most guys out there, he was pretty good at guessing what Courtney, and typical girls, were referring to within their minds. He liked to think that he could read girls’ complex thoughts. He told Roy that once and he called him a sissy. But fuck it, maybe he was.“Courtney,” he started. “We need to talk about what happened at the Annual Ball,” she crossed her arms at the comment. Well, it was exactly what she wanted to hear. “Or more, what happened to us. And our friendship.”“Or what’s left of it…” she muttered under her breath. Danny knitted his brows together.“Look Courtney, I don’t want to start shit like this but-”
“Court?”
Willam had cut him off somewhat harshly, which Danny expected anyway, and swooped to the head cheerleader’s side, placing a hand by her hip to basically shelter her. She reeled her in closely and narrowed her eyes at the junior. No matter how much taller Danny was, he still gulped when she eyed him down like that.“Is he giving you trouble?” her voice slurred with annoyance. Courtney eyed her with gratitude, smiling a tad at her action.“No, he’s fine,” she brushed off. Willam jerked her eyebrows and eyed him head to toe. He felt like he was literally getting a TSA passenger screening at an airport. “Okay, I’ll cover for you then,” she patted her soothingly. “You go talk to him.”She gently pushed her over to the bleachers, Courtney then guiding Danny to follow her too. They took a seat by the first row as they watched the squad reform again. Danny always secretly liked the uniforms. It always looked so cool and...well, prestigious. They’re top shit at their school, so obviously its looked up to. Danny sighed for a moment.“I’m sorry that I yelled at you,” the younger boy apologised, his voice a tad hesitant. “I shouldn't have done that.”“You never have done that…” Courtney bit down on her lip. “It was really different...actually,” she ran her fingers through her hair. “It made me think though, about what happened, and how I reacted because of how real it was. And how stupid I was being.”Danny nodded.“I honestly wasn’t planning to scream at you like that. No matter how mad I was, I wish I handled it better,”“Me too,”They exchanged a look of gratitude, not as soft and smiley as what they both hoped for, but it was something.“I was hoping that Jason would come back today,” the blonde confessed. “I wanted to apologise but…” she cleared her throat. “I heard about Matt, and I’m guessing…?”“Umm, yeah sort of,” he shook his head. “Wait, how did you know?”“Brad’s telling everyone, actually,” the younger boy widened his eyes. “Matt’s parents called his, and they’re starting this whole drug awareness thing at the church. I don’t know too much but-”“Are you serious?” Danny almost snapped. “S-Sorry, it’s just so…” he grumbled. “I wish they would respect him.”“Have you gone to see him?” Danny nodded.“Yeah…it was. Really real. Like, confronting, seeing him like that,” he pressed his lips together firmly. “So I don’t want people going around and spreading shit, you know?”Courtney placed her hands on top of his.“I’m gonna shut down everyone who ever brings it up, okay?” she calmingly ran her fingers down his hand. “I have your back.”His eyes saw a flash at that moment. He saw her, as a young girl, grabbing onto his hand, there to support him with a serious expression.
“I’m gonna become super super popular! So I can rule the school and tell them to back off!”
It echoed within his mind. He blinked and rubbed his eyes.“T-Thanks Court,” he glanced away. “I missed you.”“I missed you too,” she wrapped her arms around him, bringing him into a tight hug. “I missed being with you. Like this.”“Me too,” they parted, intertwining their fingers together. “But the whole thing also made me think. A lot.”“What about?” she encouragingly brushed her thumb over the back of his palm. “...did you want to get the crown so you could keep up your image?”Courtney paused. She looked at him. Looked down again. Sighed. And gazed towards him. All of that meant virtually one thousand words for him.“I knew it,” he glanced over at their squad again, going over their routine precisely with Alaska’s quick counts. He sighed. “You know, you don’t need to hide behind a picturesque view of yourself to be happy,” he tried to grin. “You’ll be much happier if you just expressed yourself naturally,” she didn’t reply with anything direct. It was something...undetermined, in a way. “That’s why you wanted the crown, wasn’t it? Because that way, you can end the year with the image that you’re perfect, and amazing and you’re the person everyone wants to be. But you know that this isn’t the person you want to be. It’s the person everyone else wants you to be. So you go along with it.”Her gaze fell into her lap. So low, that Danny couldn't meet it. “B-But I’m a head cheerleader,” she started, her voice a tad cracked. “I have a perfect family, I live the perfect life. I’m even blonde for god sake,” she shook her head. “I’m literally the definition of what Marina wants to be in “Teen Idle”,” she laughed. “What more does life want?”“It’s not the true you, you want to be,” he raised her eyes. “I know you. I know you want to truly be with Willam and you want to--”“Stop,” she snapped. “Don’t say that.”“Don't you think I saw the way you looked at her just then? Or the way she looked at you?” “Just stop it…” she looked towards her cheer squad again, looking as perfect as you expect, but not feeling anywhere near perfect. “...the more you say it out loud…” she muttered. “The more I might actually believe it…”“Maybe it’s because it’s the truth…?” his grin fully spread itself out onto his lips. He collected a single tear which was about to roll down her cheek.“I don’t want it to be…” her bottom lip quivered. “I don’t want any of this to be. I want to be satisfied with what I have. I literally have the High School American Dream. Why am I wasting this? What God gave me?”Danny parted his lips and rubbed away his appending frown.“You have the chance to be happy, you know?” “You know I don’t Danny,” the way her words curl at his name made his heart pulse achingly. “It’s so much easier said than done. If life and God is telling me to be one way, then I have to be that way. I’m so lucky, to have all this, and why would I waste all of that?”“But maybe if God is really out there,” he collected her gentle hands within his. “Shouldn't he be happy for you being yourself?”Her eyes widened at the comment.She gently smiled.“Maybe,” she lightly chuckled. “Maybe not,” she glanced over at them again, well, more specifically Willam, who was taking charge of her role, her hips cocked out as she clapped her hands. Courtney liked it when she was firm and a tad bitchy like that. She knew what she wanted, and that was a whole lot more than what she could ever do. She loved it. “Hopefully.”Danny smiled at it. Smiled at her being so happy like that. It was a weird sensation, knowing how much someone loves someone else without them even realising. He knew he was going to laugh about this one day. He knew he was going to see Courtney and Willam in like 4 years time, and they’d be together, and really really happy, and they wouldn’t be in a shithole like here. They’d be out in the city where they would be happy. And Courtney can go to that vegan cafe he saw once. And Willam would accompany her and order for her and it would be so cute. And sometime s Danny would come with Roy and--He coughed.“...gay…” he whispered, making her snap over and sneer.“Shut up,” she slapped him on the shoulder. “Seriously though,” he grinned. “Marina and the Diamonds? That’s the single handedly most lesbian thing you could’ve said.”“Jesus Danny,” she slapped him again. “I’m going to slap you in the face you dog if you don’t shut up!”They suddenly bursted out into laughter, squeezing each other admiringly.Willam watched over them, smiling to herself as she concluded their practise session. Alaska hopped off the top of the pyramid, joining her side.“Your stares make it a little more obvious, you know?” she teased, glancing down at her with a wide smirk. Willam rolled her eyes.“What are you talking about?” she denied casually, brushing down her skirt and walking over to the pair’s side.“You know exactly what I’m talking about,” she snuck in a quick little nudge and a punch before they entered Courtney and Danny’s view.“Practice is over. Do you wanna head over to mine?” Willam asked coolly, brushing off Alaska’s chuckles. “Umm, sure I’d love to,” the blonde hopped up and gave a coy smile to Danny.“Oh actually, I’m busy this afternoon. I’m hanging out with Sharon for the musical,” Alaska slumped her bag over her shoulder. “So I’ll see you guys tomorrow.”“Okay, bye ‘Lasky,” Courtney waved goodbye, eyeing Danny to scatter too. “So you wanna head off?”“Yeah,” Danny thought they stood too close to each other for it to be platonic. And Courtney would laugh a tad too long to be considered friendly. And Willam would brush past her hand and linger there a moment too long for it to be not intimate.
“Wait, I didn’t bring anything though,”
“Oh come on Court, you stay over, like, all the time. I have a pile of your clothes and PJs at my house. It’s cool.”
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
Courtney didn't let many people make her over like this. So she was sort of wondering why she was totally fine with Willam, standing way too close to her, with a brush that’s completely dripping in glitter, dabbing at her eye somewhat harshly. Actually, she couldn't really tell if she was being harsh. Maybe this was her usual force. When she opened her eyes again, she saw herself virtually looking like Willam, maybe a little softer on the features. She scoffed.“I look…”“Amazing,” her friend sat next to her on the bed. “I know.”“...just like you,” she mumbled. “Yeah. So great,” she shrugged. “I know.”She blinked. “I look like a hooker dressed as Britney Spears, dressed as a rejected cheerleader from Glee who’s trying to look like Farrah Moan,” Willam suddenly swooped down to her side, cupping her cheeks and scanning her for a second. She seemed to be inspecting her intently. “Oh nah, you’re prettier,” she grinned. “Much prettier.”She parted, leaving a somewhat stunned Courtney, who could only just swallow as she shuffled slightly in her chair. She glanced at herself in the mirror one more time. She smiled.“I sort of like it though,” she tossed her hair back. “Maybe I should wear it for a competition one day.”“Yeah, the glitter looks great from the stands,” she shoved her hand into the bowl of popcorn, crunching on a handful. “It’ll overshadow your smile though.”“T-Thanks…?” she somewhat took the compliment. “Anyways,” she swung herself around. “How do you think the squad’s going? You know, with formations and all that.”“I think it’s going pretty well,” she handed the bowl over to Courtney, who took a few and popped them in her mouth. “We could be a little tighter but we have a few more weeks. In saying that, that ending pose is utter shit,” Courtney bursted out into laughter. “It’s a tall-ass human pyramid that falls apart every time we get to it. And we haven't even placed you on the top yet. What the fuck are we going to do?”“I don’t really know,” she hummed. “As cheer captain, I’m thinking of repositioning a few members. And maybe think up a new position."“This is why we shouldn't put some airhead like Tatianna at the bottom,” she rolled her eyes. “Maybe we need another guy for support…?” she suggested. “How quickly can we get another guy?” she asked. “Well, unless you want me to-”“For the last time Will, I’m not going to accept guys who come onto the squad, soelely because you sucked their dick,” she groaned. “Just a suggestion,” she nonchalantly brushed off.“Oh!” an idea sprung to her mind. “What about Jason? Maybe we can get him back again.”“Oh that gay guy?” the other blonde opened her eyes a tad. “I doubt it. Bad news, his boy toy dropped out of the football team.”“Are you talking about Matt?” Willam looked over at her with actual confusion. “Yeah. Who else would I be talking about?” she cocked her head to the side. “It’s, like, super obvious. Or is it just me?”“Um...now that you mention it…?” she was lying. She really didn’t know. Like, at all. She spent most football games, if not performing, thinking about what she would do after. Or gossiping with Willam and Alaska. Or staring at Willam. Scratch that last point. “And who wouldn’t, right? He’s like,” she kissed her teeth. “Super good looking.”“Totally,” lie #2. Willam laughed.“You can’t say that. You’re dating Dan, remember?” she joked.“Totally,” somewhat of a lie #3. She sometimes brushed that fact off. And sometimes meant all the time. He’s sort of a...second thought sometimes. He would come over in the mornings while she’s at her locker, which was luckily situated right next to her friends’, and he’d give her a quick peck, maybe grab something if he’s feeling like an asshole, and they’d walk down to their first period class and give that quick parade-like march to showcase their amazingly picturesque look. And then she would run off with Willam, quietly wiping her lips in the process, and join her in a much more pleasant and nice conversation. “But you can appreciate, obviously, right?” jesus stop asking these questions, I don’t care.“Totally,” lie #whoeverthefuckcares. This is Courtney’s go-to line when she’s bullshitting. “Anyways, Jason. Let’s get him back.”“How?” she raised an eyebrow.“I’m best friends with Danny. Virtually. I bet I can convince him to convince Jason,” she gestured. “Good luck with that,” she grinned. “In the meantime, I’ll figure out what to do with our current squad with ‘Lasky.”“When? ‘Lasky’s out with Sharon. Tonight and tomorrow,” she explained. “Another sleepover.”Willam grumbled. “Is there something going on between them?” she moaned. “I’m being fucking serious. They’re always together.”“I don’t know. We hang out a lot too, right?”That’s when it hit her. Was there something between them? In a way that was similar to Sharon and Alaska’s? Because it sort of...seemed like it. They hung out often, they were touchy-feely, they were comfortable around each other--“I guess so,” she shrugged off way too quickly for Courtney’s liking. “I don’t know. Alaska seems so much happier when they’re together...if that makes sense.”“Who knows? Maybe we’re shitty friends,” they both laughed. “True. That’s probably why,” she chuckled off, slumping down on her bed. Courtney shuffled over to her, lying right next to her. Like they usually did on Friday nights. They’d clasp their hands together, and the older girl would giggle into her neck. “Okay, I need to get this shit off of my face,” her lips lightly grazed her right shoulder. Was that normal? Normal, girl-friends do that, right? Specifically “girl-friend”, not “girlfriend”. “I’ll help,” she answered back, as they both sat up. “You better actually help. Last time you sent snapchats to ‘Lasky of mascara smudged across my face,”“It was a one time thing. I swear.”
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
Watching a movie, eating a nice lunch, and wandering around the mall was something that Danny missed too much. How long had it been? He probably hadn't done it since even middle school. Since he’d done this with Roy and Courtney. The original trio.“Courtney, that looks disgusting,” Roy laughed, jabbing at her plate with his fork. “Well, it’s not,” she squealed back. “It’s vegan cheese, and gluten-free bread with rocket and-”“That sounds stupid,” Danny grinned, picking at his own plate, which was basically clean now anyway. “It’s called ‘health’ Danny,” she pointed out with a sharp but still playful tone. “I need to be in tip, top shape for the cheerleading competition coming up.”“How is that going?” Roy asked. “Great, mostly,” she swallowed down her food. “Yeah, it did look pretty great when I saw it in rehearsals,” Danny smiled. “The only problem is…” she pressed her lips together. “The human pyramid, which is our end position, isn’t that great. It’s just so...imbalanced. And it doesn't work.”“That sucks,” Danny tried to sympathise with her. “Yeah…” she sighed. “But I mean, we could bring Jason back and all…”She gave a small smile, which the younger boy quickly picked up. He rolled his eyes and chuckled a little. He shoved aside his plate.“I mean I can ask him but-”“Great. Cool. Thanks,” she grinned. Danny snorted.“Is that why we came out here?” he sipped on his glass of water somewhat amusingly. Roy raised an eyebrow, like he was supporting his view and he looked over to Courtney.“What? No, I mean,” she pursed her lips. “Not necessarily.”“Court,” the oldest boy eyed her firmly. “Is there something you’re not telling us?”“Can I just say that I’m very happy to be here?” she noted, to begin. “Like, I’m incredibly happy. I missed you guys and it’s been a great day.”“Cut the shit Court. Did you invite Danny out to get Jason back on the squad?” Roy asked in an overly dramatic tone. Like a voice you expect from a crime-thriller drama. “Maybe,” she squeaked out. “B-But it’s been a great day and-”Danny bursted out into laughter.“You sound so guilty,” he chuckled. “I don’t think you’re cut out to be a popular girl Court. You need to be more remorseless than that!”He enthused jokingly, making Roy laugh too.“Oh shut up! I can be such a bitch if I want to,” she argued back childishly.“Can not,”“Can to,”“Can not,”“Jesus shut up!” Roy cracked up. “You two never change, do you?”“Nope,” they chorused with a sing-song voice. “Okay, what about this?” he began. “We’ve all finished our meals. Why don't we get ice cream-?” as Courtney opened her lips, Roy quickly managed to rush past her and cut her off. “Or sorbet,” she nodded. “And then maybe walk home. If we want, we could actually come over to mine. My parents are out tonight, so we could watch a movie or whatever.”Danny’s face completely lit up. “We totally should! That sounds great,” he enthused, instantly looking towards Courtney for her approval. “Yeah okay,” she grinned. “I was planning to meet up with Willam tonight but…”“I thought you saw her yesterday,” Danny tried to nudge her, but it was so subtle that it ran under Roy’s radar, and kind of hers too. “Yeah, but we see each other a lot,” she shrugged. “Don’t girls usually do that though?” Roy pointed out. “Yeah, I guess so,” Courtney agreed, brushing it off obliviously.Danny was somewhat upset that neither of them realised what he was trying to hint at.In saying that, maybe it was unconsciously, but Courtney continued to talk about Willam. It wasn’t originally just about Willam. It was also about Alaska too, after Roy brought up the musical. And then she talked about all the latest gossip while they ate their dessert and wandered home, with a whole tub of sorbet which Courtney accidentally bought because of the temptations. She threw the whole 'health' thing out the window. Then it went to cheerleading. To Willam and her really stupid stunts at parties. Then to Roy warning her about parties. And Courtney confessed to them that she sort of hated that life. That “popular life”. And then they were sitting on top of Roy’s sofa, the TV softly playing in the background, after hours and hours of talking. And they didn’t even realise that they had been talking for around 6 hours straight. It was probably a normal thing for teenagers; to talk for hours on end because when you’re that young, conversations are like a bottomless pit. Topics fall and fall until you find something else, and like Alice, you latch onto another topic when you find it, and you do that a couple of times I guess. Especially teenage friends. Best friends.“I don't even want to do it sometimes, you know?” she wailed, on her fourth bowl of sorbet. She was basically in tears - that state that most girls went through when they were going through a break up. But this wasn’t a break up. Somewhat sadly. “Yeah, it’s okay Court,” Roy tried to sympathise with her. Even though he didn’t understand it at all.“We have talked about this before,” Danny tried to hint at an earlier conversation. And she looked over at him, and narrowed her eyes just a tad. "You know? Labels, expectations, being "fake"...?"Courtney shook her head."Quit it Danny," her words sharped a little.“What’s he talking about?” the brunette asked, somewhat concerned. “Umm…” she murmured. Her eyes instantly went over to Danny, a little cautious. He boomeranged the gaze back, trying to smile a little to push Courtney forward. “Stuff happened between us.”“The annual ball thing?”“Kind of, yeah,” Danny shrugged. “We talked about that...and…?”“I don't think Roy should know,” she argued."Begins with W..." he hinted again. But it made Courtney more anxious."Stop it,""Something to do with the letter "L"...?""I mean it, shut the fuck up," The harsh word made Danny both nervous and upset. "Why the fuck not?"“What shouldn't I know?”“Why can't Roy know?”“Because he doesn't know,”“Doesn't know what?”“I think he should know,” She paused. Danny looked at her, his eyes bulging with anticipation. And Roy just sat beside him with utter confusion. He felt like he was standing outside of a little bubble that the other two were apart of. “It’s something really stupid though,” she pulled out a cry, her bottom lip quivering just a bit. When Courtney's shaky, it made the other two shaky.“I bet it’s not,” Roy stretched out his infamous smile. Could fool anyone. And it fooled Danny every single time. Courtney inhaled and exhaled incredibly deeply. So deeply, that she didn’t even realise that she could breathe that much. Her chest was achingly pulsing within her grasp, and it made her gaze foggy and misty. Her head felt light all of a sudden.Then there was a pause, where she hitched her breath and the other two leaped over to her in concern. “Courtney, are you feeling okay?” the oldest boy swooped down to her side, lightly curving around Danny to inspect her. “You’re giving me that look of concern you pull when you’re about to pass out. If this is so serious, you don’t need to-”The two boys looked at each other for a moment. Danny was sure that Roy would understand. The whole Willam thing. The whole coming out thing. Right?Roy, on the other hand, was still confused, trying to catch onto the little hints of detail Danny expressed on his face. He didn't get it though. Like, at all. What they were more worried about, was Courtney. She looked physically drained. Like all the life was sucked out of her. And she inhaled one more time, looking like she was gathering all the force she had left inside of her to say what she was just about to say. But there seemed to be one more thing that was holding her back. That force that was building in her chest. That overwhelming sense of anxiety that stopped the flow of her words. But with Danny's warming smile and Roy's genuine affection, it gave her one more push. A push that she really needed at that moment, that peeled open her lips to finally say it.
“I’m a lesbian.”
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
Roy almost laughed. Like he found it funny enough to actually not believe it. But he stopped when she didn’t gain any more colour onto her face. And plus, this wasn’t her type of comedy.“W-What did you say?” he let out one more chuckle to try and sweeten the mood. “I-I’m…” she felt like she was choking on her own words. And she couldn't bare to say it again because she felt sick. She felt like she couldn't swallow.Roy snapped his attention to Danny. “Is she being serious?” he was so baffled. You could just tell by his face. “Danny, she has to be kidding right?” the youngest boy didn’t even need to answer that. He just gazed up at him, his eyes wide and circular, sweat dripping from his forehead. “Are you actually kidding me?” he stared over at Courtney with absolute discomfort. “What about Dan? How long have you been together now?” she stiffly shrugged, hiccuping. “What does he mean to you?”Danny instantly lunged over to her, wrapping his arms around her nearly trembling body. She looked so skinny and frail and almost defenceless. “Roy, she’s trying to come out to you. Can’t you be a little nicer than that?” his voice was firm. “I-I’m just trying to comprehend it,” he reasoned harshly. Courtney sniffed. “I don’t get it. At all.”“But it’s not for you to get,” he argued. “It’s for her to understand. It’s apart of her identity and the least you can do is-”“But I want to understand it,” he snaked his gaze around him and towards Courtney. “You’re one of my best friends and I’m trying to wrap my head around this fucking situation!” he yelled, sending shivers down both his friends’ spines. “Why are you now telling me that you’ve been in the closet? Does Dan know? Does anyone else know?”“I’m the only one…” Danny mumbled back. Roy widened his eyes. “Do you have a thing with Willam?”“What? No!” Courtney spurted out through thick tears. “I-It’s not like that.”“Is that why you always go out with her. Hang out with her?” he shook his head. “Is that what you've been doing behind closed doors?!”“Roy calm down!” Danny screamed, so much louder than he wanted and he imagined. But it made the boy halt and stay silent. “I-It’s not Court’s fault. She was born like this, and there’s absolutely nothing you can do about it. No one can do anything about it,” he felt Courtney brush against his arm. “But there is nothing wrong with it either.”“Danny, you need to understand that-”“Whatever you’re going to say,” he began, realising that this was probably the first time he properly cut him off. “Make sure that you think it through. Because whatever you’re going to say is going to determine whether we’re all friends or not.”Roy gulped.“D-Danny, what are you saying?” he crinkled his brows. But Danny didn’t stand back down.“Courtney’s love for herself matters more than whatever friendship we have,” his words trembled. “Because I need to make sure that she can have enough strength in herself and her identity. This is going to affect her for the rest of her life, you know that right?”Roy gulped again.“You two mean the world to me, you know? I’m don't want to judge you Court,” he rationed. “I was just confused,” he was trying to clarify calmly. “But you need to understand something. I’m going to be worried about you. The stares, the looks, all the rumours that’ll spread around,” she glanced away from his strong gaze. “Do you see how this school treats Jason? And he’s still considered closeted.”“I-I never said I wanted to come out,” she stammered. “I just wanted to…” she tilted her head to the side to puzzle-piece it underneath Danny’s chin. “...tell you. That’s all.”Roy gave an uneasy sigh.“Well,” he sat back down, trying to relax himself as much as possible. “Okay. Thanks for telling me.”It was an answer that was much too simple for Roy. Too short. Too unfinished. It meant that he was confused. And he didn’t know how to plant his feet back into the ground again.“So…?” Danny started. Mostly because whatever his answer was, his true answer, was going to affect him too. In a way. He didn’t want to be selfish in this situation, because this was a challenge for Courtney more than him at this point, but in reality, it really did affect him. Because if Roy really was still homophobic, that means he would never like Danny again. Nonetheless understand him and feel comfortable around him. He could imagine Roy thinking of all the times they hung out, how they slept in the same bed, shared food...Danny wondered if he found him disgusting if he ever found out. It made him feel incredibly self-conscious. “I don’t understand what the creation of the universe had to do with who you love and who you can’t,” he stated, shrugging. “So religion isn’t going to get between us,” the others widened their eyes. “Even though it’s not something that’s completely accepted within this community..." he halted to take a small sigh. "And maybe me...in a way, because that's how I was brought up to think but,” he opened his arms up, like he was inviting her in for a hug. "I don't want to get in the way of this relationship. Sorry for coming off so strong earlier, I tend to do that. But, I want you to know that I accept you, and I’m going to try my best to support you,” she instantly wriggled out of Danny’s grasp to lunge over to him and cry into his shoulder for relief. He patted her calmingly and smiled into her neck. “Because I love you. And something like this isn’t going to get in the middle of that, ok?”His eyes roamed up, meeting Danny’s. And for a moment, their eyes locked perfectly into a gaze of awe. For that moment, Danny swore that Roy gave him a little wink, like he was hinting towards something. But he could’ve been hinting towards anything, really. Whether it was what he said before about protecting Courtney, their rekindling friendship or...sexuality. He didn’t really know. He hoped it was the latter.“Okay, but it is getting late,” he parted from their embrace. “We’ll walk you home now, okay? Make sure to get some sleep, and,” he nudged her. “Whenever you need someone, call me, okay? I got you.”All three of them exchanged warm smiles. Smiles filled with absolute perfection. They were forever.
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
Courtney went home that night, after dabbing her cheeks dry, and she slept soundly and calmly in her own bed. Danny, on the other hand, accidentally stayed over at Roy’s house again. He didn’t mean to. It just sort of happened. But it was somehow even better than the other night. He couldn't get a grin off his lips as he tucked himself into bed right next to Roy. The older boy’s head fell to his side, smiling towards Danny with a sense of tiredsomness.“Today’s been…” he mumbled through his lips, looking physically drained. “...tiring.”Danny chuckled.“I get you. Completely,” Yeah, Courtney coming out, before him too, was the biggest shock of his life. And it seemed to drain everything out of his body, leaving him to sort of go numb. But it worked out in the end. After an odd fight that he never thought they would have.“...sorry for shouting at you earlier,” he pressed his lips together. “It’s okay,” Roy exhaled. “I deserved it. I was being the biggest douche bag. I hated myself in that moment,” the younger boy glanced down at the comment. “I shouldn't have reacted the way I did. I can’t believe it took me that long to actually say something nice to her.”“I-It’s understandable,” he tried to lift up his spirits. “Have you seen what this place is like? This school? This neighbourhood? Everyone’s so much more hateful than you are.”“I’m scared it’s getting to me,” he confessed with a deep voice. “I really don’t want to push her away. And people like her, you know? What if they’re my friends? I don’t want to ruin it just because I’m a homophobic asshole.”Danny gently smiled.“It’s okay Roy. You’ll never push me away,”He widened his eyes. Danny gasped at his own words, flustering instantly as he felt himself shiver.“I-I meant because you’re homophobic and you’re against people I know. I didn't mean like-” he laughed nervously. “That sounded stupid, I’m.”“Danny,” he cut him off. He sort of groaned, like he was somewhat conflicted. And he brushed his fingers through his hair and let out a long sigh. “Okay. Look, whether you are or not, I don’t care. This,” he guided his hands between them. “Between us. As friends,” that stung him. “Won’t ever change. But, just know that…” he pursed his lips. “This process for me...i-it’s not going to be quick and easy. I’m trying my best to get over it. What I’ve been taught and all that but…”“I’m sort of confused…” Danny confessed with a small chuckle.“I’m trying to be okay with Court, and probably Jason and everyone like that but,” he bit down on his lip. “I don’t think I can fully accept anyone yet. If they’re in a relationship, like, if Court begins to date Willam, or some other girl…” Danny felt his heart crack a little. “I don’t think I can accept that. I don’t think I want to see them hug, or kiss...especially guys.”That’s the moment his heart completely shattered into a million pieces. Millions and trillions of small pieces that were blowing away in the wind. With his small exhale. And he felt his chest completely fall onto itself, like his heart was beating without an actual time signature. “R-Right,” he just managed to choke out, the words scratching the sides of his throat.“It’s not like I’m against them. Like, it’s not like I hate them in anyway, it’s just like. I don’t want to see it. It’s what you’re taught, from when you’re young. It's seen as wrong. And it's just implanted in my brain and I can't get it out of my system. And it's sort of gross actually-”Danny blacked out in a second. Actually, he didn’t know what it was like to just pass out. He never have in his life. So this was a new experience for him. But his whole body just seemed to...give out. Go limp and collapse. That word. “Gross”. Who was he? Roy, the guy who meant virtually everything to him before, now meant virtually nothing. He was borderline worthless to him now. He maybe wouldn’t have felt like this if Roy told him that before he met Jason that day. Because Danny didn’t have enough self confidence to tell himself that it was okay to disagree with someone who is homophobic. Someone that is against him for the way he is. For the way he was born. But it didn’t mean that it was any less painful to hate the guy you loved. For years. Because it felt like they had your back. But he really didn’t. He just made himself believe that. Made himself believe in this picturesque view of what he wanted in life because he just wasn’t satisfied enough. So...he really was just as bad as everyone else in his school. They all believed in this dreamlike fairytale that would never work out. Because he was an idiot for thinking that Roy would be happy with him. Or anyone would be happy with him. Ever. He was so embarrassed. How could he think that Roy would ever love him back? “You’re disgusting,” It was something that he sort of thought about for himself, but he found himself saying it to Roy. And when he blinked to see what was in front of him, he couldn't fully wrap his head around why he couldn't. But it was because he was crying. Unconsciously. Tears followed down his cheeks and he couldn't stop feeling like his whole body was knotting together. He hunched over, completely breaking down into his hands. He wiped away the droplets with his sleeve, his gaze slowly defrosting. He saw Roy looking up at him, his eyes wide and his jaw dropped. He was sprawled across the floor of his bedroom. His body had fallen down, and Danny didn’t even know how he got down there. How he forced him down there. It looked like he kicked or punched him in the stomach forcefully, leaving the boy to hit his back against his desk.“I-I’m so…” he rushed towards him instantly, tears still rolling down his cheeks, staining his shirt. He couldn't even finish his sentence. Because he was conflicted. He felt bad for...whatever just happened. But he’s still a complete dick. He’s rubbish. “W-What the fuck?!” he stammered. “What the fuck was that Danny?”“I didn’t mean to…” his reasonings sat lopsidedly. “You’re doing that,” he smacked away Danny’s hand and got up himself. “I-I’m doing what?” his eyes never left him as he brushed off dust from his trousers. “You’re doing that thing you do,” he stated, his voice hoarse and cracked. “When you’re beating yourself down internally,” he raised his eyebrows. “It’s what I said. I know. We should go downstairs and talk about it properly.”
Stop. Fucking stop it.
It physically hurt him when Roy looked at him like that, and cared about him like that. He filled a glass to the top with water and they sat by the counter in the kitchen as Danny quietly sipped on it.
“I’m an asshole,” the older boy began as he leaned over towards him.
“Yeah, you fucking are,” he spat. “I-I can’t believe you.”
“You said you would understand,”
“Gross? Are you fucking kidding me?!” he slammed down the glass. “You know what? I fucking dare you to spend a day with someone like Max. Someone that is so amazing, and great and talented-”
“I already said that I don’t hate gay people just-
“He fucking hated himself because of people like you!” he screamed. “Do you know he was planning to fucking torture himself for a month at conversion camp?!” Roy took a step back. “He hates himself because of people like you who call him disgusting, and gross and creepy and maybe he’ll never get to be fucking happy,” he shook his head and blinked away the tears. “And he fucking deserves happiness a lot more than most people at this fucking school.”
“Well I’m…” he trailed off. “Sorry...I guess…”
He seemed genuinely speechless.
"A lot more than someone like you..." he mumbled, his face swollen with hurt. Roy reached over to him, his chest feeling heavy.
"Danny, I actually like Max. He's great and-"
"But do you think of him any differently now that you know that he's gay?" he received no real response.
"I-I mean..." he trailed off. "No. I don't. O-Or eventually I'll feel that way, I don't..."
"Roy, I honestly don't feel like I know you anymore," he shook his head.
"If you're taught that it's wrong, then-"
"How old are you?!" he shouted. "Seriously? You're acting like some 60 year old grandma who's trying to accept her gay grandson. You're fucking 17! You're not even an adult yet. Is it really that hard to change your opinions and views?" he snickered sarcastically. "You're making excuses right now Roy."
"It's not an excuse!" he exclaimed back. "Do you honestly think that I willingly act hateful!?"
“I will never be able to understand why the fuck you can be so rude,” he pushed aside his glass and eyed Roy harshly. “Fuck you. I’m heading home.”
“Wait Danny-” he sort of grumbled it, his mindset going from blind anger to pleading.
“I can’t be with you. At all. I feel sick from just standing next to you.”
When he stepped foot into his own bedroom again, he completely fell apart into his hands. He cried so much that his jaw was hanging achingly. And he couldn't even muster up any courage to talk to him ever again, even though the first thing he wanted to do was talk to him again to resolve it.
He hated himself at that moment. But what he hated more was that he let Roy get to him this much. For all these years.
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
“It’ll be okay Danny…”The only place where he felt truly safe now was in his mom’s arms. They sipped on warm tea together in the morning, sitting by the backyard sofa. It gave him a warm feeling in his chest. Comfort and absolute glee. “I figured something like this would happen,” she muttered sadly. Danny looked up at her with a slight frown. “Then why didn’t you warn me?” he sniffed, his eyes still a little misty from tears. But it was still calm and wonderful nonetheless. “Because,” she grinned. “I was hoping that Roy would understand...I always knew you liked him dear.”Danny giggled somewhat painfully. It was right, yeah, at one point. But...he wished it wasn't. The way his mom smiled at him made him feel nostalgic and more at home. “And I bet he’ll come around sometime. If you tell him something logical, he'll believe it. Trust me. I've known him since he was just a little baby,” she encouraged. “But I don’t think you should be talking to him all that much anymore. It looks like he’s really getting to you and I don't want him to hurt you anymore, okay?”There was a pause. Where Danny gave a deep sigh for what he wanted to say. “H-He…” he hiccuped. There was no going back now. “He asked me to go to the city with him when he graduates.”“He, what?” she scoffed. “And he’s homophobic?” Danny bursted out into laughter, wiping away his tears. “He’s really giving you mixed signals there.”“I know!”“What a douchebag,”“I know!” he chuckled. “Well, I didn't see that coming from Roy..." she took a gulp of her tea which steamed in her mouth. “He's filled with many surprises. But I know that overprotective parents create the best liars. And his parents are…?”“Incredibly overprotective?” he received a nod. “Mom, are you trying to hint that-?”“Roy might be gay and in complete denial. Maybe,” she grinned to herself. “No theatre kid is straight dear. I thought we all knew that.”“Either way I don’t want to see him anymore. Or talk to him. I want him to apologise before I do because he’s more of a dick than I am,”“Didn’t you push him off the bed?” she chuckled. “Well, I didn’t mean to,” they chorused a lighthearted laugh. It felt airy and light within Danny’s chest.“Thanks mom…” he mumbled. “I needed that.”“Anytime,” she stood up from the sofa, brushing herself off. “Tell me how it goes when you talk to him again, okay?”“Okay mom.”He sat on his own for a couple of minutes after that, feeling the tea pool within his stomach. Uncomfort seemed to cast over his body and it never died down after what happened, even though he slept through it. He was hoping that it would sort out, but he knew what was right, and he needed to stick to his own morals. Even if it cut off ties. Because he knew that he wasn't exactly in the wrong. Actually no, he wasn't in the wrong. At all. And he was going to stick to that. ***Danny sort of liked playing the role of “best friend”, if that made sense. After finding out that Kurtis was busy for the whole weekend from his cafe job, and Max was off at some band performance out west, it left the youngest, and most free member of the group to go support Jason at the hospital. His mom had dropped him off in front of the building and waved to him casually like she was dropping her son off at the kindergarten. Even though it was actually the hospital, and he needed to visit his friend who had a drug overdose.But this was a positive day for him and Jason. Well, the former cheerleader didn’t really want to be at the hospital, really, but Matt was feeling a lot better now which made him feel a lot better. He made sure to visit him everyday basically. After a few days of feeling completely sick at home, he decided to actually be productive. The moment he felt well enough to get up, he put on a nice jacket, actually put on presentable pair of pants and drove to the hospital to see his boyfriend. And he looked pale, frail and skinny on the very first day. But the way he smiled when Jason twisted the knob and thrusted forward, made him feel amazing. It was indescribable. So it basically meant that Jason had to come and visit him everyday. Before school, then after school until the nurse had to come in for Matt’s dinner. And then he’d drive home, and call him until they both went to bed. It was a little excessive, yeah, but he figured that Matt was pretty lonely at the hospital by himself. “Has any of the others come to see you?” Jason asked, tucking him under the covers nicely.“Not that often, but yeah,” he smiled. “Kurtis came a few days ago and Max pops in with vegetable soup every now and then.”“It’s so good, isn’t it?” he chuckled. “I had some the other day.”Matt’s expression dulled in concern. Jason gulped at the sudden change in expression. “Were you sick the other day?” he said worriedly. “He only makes that whenever somebody’s sick.”Jason gave a small smile to reassure him, and he raised his hand to lightly caress his cheek. “I wasn’t sick, really,” he brushed off. “I just wasn’t feeling the best so I stayed home for a few days.”They exchanged concerned looks, but Jason tried his best to swat every one of them away. “Was it because of me?” and when he asked, it made Jason shudder. Silence.“Of course not. I mean-” he sighed. “I’m just happy to see you being healthier nowadays. Forget about my health for a second, you’re doing amazingly. Look at you, you’re regaining colour and weight, you can talk clearly now and-”“But I can’t just forget about your health Jason. I care about you,” his look of concern, where his eyes seemed to droop and his lips parted, made Jason heat up a little from flattery. Jason pressed his lips together and shuffled a little closer. “I’m okay,” he placed his hand on top of his under the covers and squeezed it. “Trust me.”“I trust you,” they exchanged familiar grins. Ones that puzzle-pieced together perfectly. "But promise me one thing babe.""What is it?" Jason leaned in a little closer."You're gonna need to look after yourself, okay? Properly. Because I'm not always gonna be there to do that," he smiled a little. "And I care about you so much. I don't think love can muster up the amount of love I have for you."Jason giggled like a giddy little girl. "I feel the same way," he bit down on his lip to contain his smile. "So stay healthy. Eat. Drink plenty of water. Maybe exercise, I heard that's good,""Do you even exercise. Ever?""No," he laughed. "But I still encourage it.""But okay," he grinned subtly. "I'll do it for you.""No," he said firmly. "You should do it for you."Jason couldn't help but lunge over towards him and kiss him deeply. He wondered how he found someone like Matt. And he wondered why someone like Matt would be into him. Love him the way he did. Because it was so heart-warmingly perfect that it sort of hurt him sometimes. He also wondered how he would cope if he was to ever leave. If Matt somehow disappeared from his life. “Anyways, I’m sure Danny wants to come in and see you too,” Jason shook his head and regained the essence of reality. Matt smiled at his comment. “Danny’s here?” he brightened.“Yeah, he said he wanted to see you,” more like he was coming to support me because I think I have an obsession with coming to see you.“That’s great, he can come in, right?” he shuffled to sit up just a little in his bed. Jason swooped down and gave him a light peck on the lips before he opened the door and fetched Danny by the waiting room.The air outside the room was so much cooler and less stuffy. It felt a little refreshing. He couldn't wait until Matt could get up again so he could smell the fresh air. And he wanted them to go down to a cafe and have some brunch, and then take a nice stroll at the park or their school, and they would lie down with each other and Jason would feel the grass by his back. And he would laugh into his neck and Matt would wrap his arms around him to make him feel safe and loved and perfect.He really wanted him to get out already so they could be perfectly imperfect together.
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
When the youngest boy walked in, he was a little surprised by all the gifts surrounding Matt. He figured that a few of the stuff was from Kurtis. He had overheard him say something about getting a pay rise and wanting to spend it on a pillow or blanket for Matt during school. But there were additional teddy bears, and vegan chocolates for some reason, and knitted scarfs and letters piled up by Matt’s bedside table. It made Danny gulp. Not only did he bring him nothing, but he thought all the gifts were a little excessive. It had only been like 6 days.“Hey Danny,” Matt looked excited to see him though. He lowered himself to give him a small hug. “Hey Matt,” he smiled. “How’ve you been?”“I feel a lot better thanks,” he always had this amazing smile. That genuine one that made you feel better by just talking to him. But Danny couldn't get rid of that sinking feeling of defeat because of their setting. Because Matt was sat in bed in the hospital because of an overdose. Sometimes Danny wondered what would’ve happened if Matt had more, or something went horribly wrong. Somehow more than it had. And then maybe he would’ve been…No. He refused to say that.“So? How has your weekend been?” Matt asked politely. “Umm…” he cleared his throat. “...fine.”That was the biggest lie of the century.“I heard you hung out with Courtney and Roy?” Jason nudged him playfully. But with the look of distraught that covered Danny’s face, he stopped immediately. “Oh no. Something happened, didn’t it?”Danny never imagined himself to tell the whole anecdote so soon, or at a hospital where he wanted to actually talk to Matt, and how he had been going. But the older boy encouraged him, saying that all he had been seeing are “white walls and bad TV” and it wasn’t interesting anyway, so he gave in. But he missed that whole huge section about Courtney and her coming out. Outing her would be obviously wrong, so he just made up a lie saying that it somehow got brought up in conversation. “Oh wow…” Jason was dipping his hand into one of the boxes of chocolates he got for Matt like he it was some box of popcorn. “That’s…”“I hate Roy,”“Same,”Danny chuckled at the comment. “I don’t want to hate him or anything though. I’ve known him for my whole life and I really don’t want to ruin it because of this…” he explained with a slight frown.“If anyone was ruining this friendship, it would be him,” Jason argued. “He’s being a dick. Wait, why did he think I was gay.”Danny blinked. “Umm…” “I have no idea babe. Maybe it’s because you’re a cheerleader,” Matt nervously laughed, brushing his fingers through his hair. Jason grinned towards him and gave him a chocolate. Graciously taking it between his lips, they shared that heartwarming chuckle they do. Which physically hurts everyone watching with extreme jealousy. They’re so perfect for each other. The way they look at each other lovingly was so cliche. Danny wondered how they found each other in a place like this. And what hurt him more, was that he could probably never find someone like that for him. “About that,” Danny intruded, not the conversation as such, but mostly his thoughts because he was wandering off mentally. “Courtney wants you back.”“What?” Jason seemed genuinely confused. “I didn’t even go to most of the practises.”“Yeah but apparently the human pyramid is falling apart and they need you to hold it up or something,”“Me?” he blinked again.“Him? He has twink arms,” even Matt joined in with complete confusion. “Well, it’s either you or Tatianna apparently so…”“Fair enough then,” he nodded.“You should join the squad again babe,” Matt encouraged, running his palm over his back. “I don’t know…” he rubbed the back of his neck. “I don’t really have a point anymore.”“But your butt looks so cute in those pants babe,”“Okay I’m in,”Danny bursted out into laughter accidentally. He slapped a hand over his mouth to hold it in. “Do you want me on the squad or not?” Jason argued, an eyebrow raised.“Of course I do! It’ll make Court so happy and I love it when she’s happy,” he gushed excitedly.“Wow, I’d think you were straight if I didn’t know any better,” Matt gently laughed, his head resting against the pillow. They shared a few more anecdotes and stories that they spontaneously remembered during Jason’s prime cheerleading days. Turns out he could actually do a handstand. Once upon a time. And Willam originally didn’t want him in the squad because he’d outshine her, but Alaska accepted him because it was fair. Typical, Danny thought.And of course he joined to get Matt’s attention, conveniently joining right after they created their little foursome. Matt thought it was really cute though, you know, like most things that Jason did. And Danny noticed something he never have before. They do this thing, where they look at each other, and then they give this particular sort of laugh. One that rolled off of their tongues with familiarity and this homey-vibe that Danny couldn't quite understand or describe. He liked it though. He thought it was cute. Slightly jealous but, when was he not jealous of them? When was anyone not jealous of them? If they were out of the closet, they would’ve been the leading, gay power couple of their time. Danny was sure of it.But that meant that their goodbyes were painful too. They exchanged sweet kisses and Jason couldn't bare to walk away, but Matt reassured him with a warm smile and it sat a little better within his chest.Their ride home started off a little silent, with Jason giving a long sigh when he was at the wheel.“I want him to be okay,” he began, reversing out of the parking spot. “We all do,” the younger boy agreed. “And he will be.”“He’s coming back to school tomorrow,” he gave a small snicker. “It’s going to be crazy. You know? Just all of it. I bet everyone knows about it already.”“Yeah…” he confirmed with pity. “Brad apparently spread it, b-but you don’t need to worry about him.”“I can’t believe he’s one of my problems again,” he groaned, a heavy emphasis of anger in his words. “He will never fail to fucking piss me off. Big time.”Danny tried to laugh at it, but it mostly failed. He instead, choked out this breathy mess that made him sound like a dying pigeon. But Jason didn’t exactly look over, or seem to care all that much.“I feel so bad for Matt. I swear the world really isn’t looking out for him right now. Did you know his parents are threatening to kick him out?”Danny felt his stomach drop. “N-No. Wait what? Are you serious?” “It’s fucking insane! Jesus, I knew his parents were crazy but I didn’t know that they’d be this fucking ruthless,” he hiccuped, but seemed to gulp it down at the same time. “When I told my parents that I was going out with Matt now, their faces went pale.”“Why?” “They were happy for me, but they knew that Matt’s parents would never accept him. And it was going to be one hell of a fucking mess if they did ever find out,” he sighed. “If they somehow find out, Matt’s definitely done for. And I don’t want that fractured, broken relationship in his life. He doesn't deserve it.”“I get it…” Danny hummed. “He’s going to be just fine Jason. We’re gonna all go back to school tomorrow and it’ll be like nothing happened.”Jason looked over to him, his eyes glossier than Danny once remembered.“You think so?” he asked, his voice timid.“I know so.”The problem? Danny didn’t know so. If anything, he thought that the opposite would happen.
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
Matt felt like he somehow committed a murder in his sleep, and he didn't even know about it. Because every person looked over at him when he was walking down the hallway. And it wasn’t the usual smiles and grins, or the occasional high-five. No. They were stares. Ones that dug into his soul. And some even gasped. Whispers seemed to be his new theme song. He went from the very top, and then sunk to the very bottom of the food chain.It was a mix of a lot of things that “conveniently” rose up at the same time. Rumours somehow emerged about him and Jason. Something that made his chest plummet down his body the moment he heard it through the chain of whispers in front of him in class that he overheard. He wondered how they could even pin point it down to that. Apparently it was because of the annual ball thing, where Matt rescued Violet when all those guys surrounded her. Apparently being a genuine person to someone means that they're dating now. Even though that was the truth and all. And then that stupid overdose happened...something he really regrets...and now his life turned upside down.Literally last week, he was a football player that virtually ruled the school. And now he's here. He was really unlucky or something. But lunch was nice. Amazing, actually. Everything went back to normal when there were 5 of them. Without anyone else or anyone missing. It was perfect. Their little bubble. Max and Kurtis were having some stupid debate over the Ottoman empire. Everyone else was incredibly confused, but Matt liked how genuine it was. How it was casual and laid back.“Kurtis, I already told you, the Ottoman Empire’s history was kept orally. That’s why you can’t find anything on it that’s reliable,” Max rolled his eyes for the 100th time that lunch.“Oral? So what? They were all gay?” he laughed at his own joke.“No! It means that they never wrote down their history,” he pinched his nose. “And I told you to stop being so damn vulgar.”“But why didn’t they document everything?” he asked.“I don’t know! It’s their culture Kurtis,” “And plus, wouldn’t you be happy that they didn’t write anything down? Imagine what would happen if we had to remember everything they did,” Jason added.“Then it would be like English,” Danny pointed out. “Where we have to read endlessly and write so much!”They all laughed.“Don’t get me started on English,” Kurtis groaned. “I’m so done with Shakespeare. Macbeth is so boring.”“What’s Macbeth?” Matt casually questioned, his mind more set on straightening out his jeans than looking towards everyone gawking at him. “What?” Max raised an eyebrow. “Are you kidding?”“Yes…?” he gave a light chuckle. “What?”“You have never heard of Macbeth?” he was bewildered.“Even I have,” Danny joined in. “And I’m a fucking dumbass.”“Theatre’s stupid anyway,” he poked out his tongue, receiving a snicker from the others. Except Max. He gave a little gasp.“Theatre is not stupid,” he sounded like a whiny child, and it made Jason and Kurtis laugh amongst themselves. “You guys haven’t even been apart of theatre. The musical is actually going great right now,” Danny gulped. “Oh! Except Danny. Of course. He's apart of it.”“Umm…” the youngest boy pursed his lips. “I’m thinking of dropping out.”They all snapped their attentions towards him with confusion.Danny gulped again.
Don't think about Roy. Don't think about Roy.
“Why? I thought-” before Max could finish his sentence, Jason cut him off. “It’s time consuming anyway. Instead, you could hang out with me,” he enthused playfully, leaving Max a little off beat. “Right Danny?”“Y-Yeah,” he gave a small smile. That musical reminder was another one of the things that messed with his head. All day. It was a constant reminder that Roy and him weren’t a thing anymore. Well, okay. It never was a thing. But still. It was still a painful reminder. He somehow thought about him more when he absolutely hated his guts.Danny was over by his locker, getting his textbook for his next subject, when he saw something that sent a cold shiver down his spine. It was just after forgetting his locker combination again. Somehow. He was the type of person to just punch open his locker when stuff like this happened, but he began to talk to Sharon more, which meant that he learnt a few new tricks. The musical did have a few benefits, and she was one of them. She taught him how to pick locks and shoplift without getting caught. And to make a good grilled cheese. Danny hadn't tried that one out yet. She wasn’t actually as scary as he once thought. And hey, his locker was also situated at a nice spot. He was a little lucky for having his locker right next to the music room, because it was convenient and he always heard good music seeping out. But today was different. There wasn’t any music. He peered through a slim window on the door and he saw…Well, an odd couple. Couple wasn't a good word for it.It was Roy and Dan. Danny thought that they never talked. At all. So it caught him a little off guard to see them. But he tried to focus on collecting his books, mostly because just looking at Roy actually made him ache. Just a little. He shook his head vigourously. He couldn't tell what they were actually saying, but he could tell that Roy was in his serious mode. Because he looked a certain way when he was being serious and lowkey scary. It must have been a mature matter, Danny thought, as he left as soon as possible for his next class.Truth is, he should have actually done something when he could've. Because Courtney got a text message from Dan that next moment, which turned her life upside down.
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
“I-I can't believe it,”Courtney was sat on her bed, her body frozen and her lips turned down. She was in a complete state of shock, not knowing what to do. “It’s going to be okay Court,” Alaska reassured her, holding her hand tightly.They were all over at her house, all in their pajamas, going through their third bowl of popcorn. It was Courtney’s comfort food. “Plus he’s a fucking dickhead,” Willam added. “Seriously? What the fuck is up with him?”The blonde could feel his words just pulse through her body.
“You’re a fucking cheater! I can’t fucking believe you!”
She didn’t know what he was talking about. At all. She didn’t even have time to explain herself and tell him that she didn't cheat. Ever. And whatever he heard was a lie. She was just plain confused as to what happened, and she didn’t really know what to do from there.She wasn’t even upset at the fact that her and Dan broke up. She never cared for the guy that much anyway. It was just the fact that no one else knew yet. But it wasn’t long until everyone at school eventually found out. And then her reputation is damaged, her dream of having a childhood sweetheart and fitting in is cracked, and her facade starts to fade away slowly. And then she’ll become nothing.Just as she tried to dig her hand into the bowl again, she got a call from her phone. She instantly dived for it, seeing Danny’s name flashing. She saw his icon picture, which was of him jokingly pulling out his tongue towards the camera, playing the air guitar. It was such a stupid picture of him. It made her smile every time.“Hello?” her voice was admittedly, a little shaky.“Look outside,”Courtney instantly went to her doors, opening the large doorway to her verandah. As she rushed out and held the rails, she saw Danny down below, a phone in one hand, held to his ear, and the other waving towards her. “Hey Courtney,” he ended the call. “I thought you needed my help!”She swore his exclaim accidentally echoed throughout the street. She chuckled to herself. Even being his clumsy self, he climbed up the tree, using the same technique she used to use to get into his house, and he eventually made it up to her verandah, brushing himself off as he stretched out his smile.“Hey Danny,” she squeezed him tightly. “I can’t believe you came.”“I heard what happened Court,” he gave a small sigh. “And he’s an asshole and I hate him.”She grinned.“Me too,” she scratched at a dry tear by her cheek. “But hey, doesn't matter. You’re an independent woman and you don’t need a man,” he encouraged. “And you don’t even like men so like-”“Shh, Will and ‘Lasky are still in there,” she whispered. “But yeah. It’s not even like I liked him. Ever,” she shrugged. “But it’s like, all that social stuff, you know? What if people think differently of me?”“I know there are pressures from being the power couple of the year,” he reassured. “I get it. But hey, maybe it’s one step closer to being the person you truly are.”He eyed Willam who was still in her room, talking to Alaska casually as they listened to the music quietly playing through the radio.“Stop trying to imply it Danny,” she groaned, rolling her eyes. “It’s never gonna happen.”“Eh, I think it will eventually,” he smiled. “Well, I’m off. I’m just here to enlighten you with my amazing knowledge.”“And what’s that?” she laughed.“You don’t need to hide behind labels. Maybe this was the world telling you something, you know? Maybe it’s telling you to ditch guys and not pretend that you’re something you’re not. Who knows? You might be so much happier just being real with yourself. And the first step to that is coming out to the people who support you,” he placed his hands onto her shoulder and twirled her around. “And maybe they’re in there.”He giggled to himself and pushed her into the room again. As she awkwardly regained her stance, the other two girls looked up at her and smiled. Courtney rushed to turn around and give Danny a face but he was already gone. “Well,” Alaska stood up. “We ran out of popcorn, so I’ll get more.”She cheerfully left the room, the bowl held tightly between her crossed arms. There was a breath of silence“I hated him anyway,” Willam began, making Courtney laugh. “Seriously. I hate seeing you like this babe,” as Courtney sat back down, she brushed her fingers down her shoulder. “You don't deserve it. I should've fucking told you that I hated him from the fucking beginning.”“That's true,” she chuckled. Their eye contact didn't break like she expected it to.She never realised how amazing her eyes were until that moment. Well, she did always know, but this backed up that claim I suppose. She looked gorgeous when her brows were just creased together a tad to make her seem a little disappointed. And the fact that she was disappointed for Courtney made her feel even more amazing. Just the fact that she cared so much. It felt flattering, even though she sort of wished that she didn’t feel like that because it made her feel guilty. And all she wanted to do was feel like she actually did like Dan, and she never liked Willam. Because it still felt sort of horrible that she was lying to herself about all of this. But what was worse was that she could never ever convince herself that what she was feeling now was normal, so she was stuck in the mindset of never feeling good about anything she was doing or thinking.“Hey, what are you thinking about?” Willam asked out of the blue, her gaze somehow feeling more intense. Courtney felt her lips part at the look. The whole world around them seemed to completely melt at that moment, like the colours were all merging together into some sort of warm technicolour that Courtney couldn't really identify. Or actually care at this point. She closed her eyes to stop that from messing with her head too much, but she never seemed to open them again. Mostly because she felt something ever so soft on her lips. She held in her exhale and gulped. It felt amazing. She’d kissed people, sure, but it had never been so...perfect. Like literal sparks were flying. That was cliche but there weren’t any other ways to describe it. It was indescribable.As they parted, the world came together again, Willam still looking toward her with a thoughtful gaze. Her lips came apart just a tad so she could talk, but she was cut off by Alaska kicking open the door. “I brought popcorn,” she called, leaving the two to collapse onto the bed and exhale deeply.Courtney wondered if they would ever talk about that. That...perfect thing that just happened. That she was lucky enough to be graced with. She couldn't believe it.It really did happen.Goddamn, she was happy that she didn't make a bet with Danny because she would’ve lost money just then.She looked over at Willam one more time, a faint smile buzzing by her lips, making her feel like she wanted to smile. She didn't though, as she was still in an odd state of shock. But when the other girl looked over, and gave her a coy smile, Courtney felt better. They had this little secret now. One that no one else knew and maybe, no one else will ever find out about. It was indescribably satisfying. It left tingles through her whole body as she shoved a mouthful of popcorn in her mouth and painfully swallowed. This was something new. But it didn't feel like it was. It felt more like it needed to eventually happen, and it finally did.
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
Sharon had a really nice voice, Danny thought. He used to think that she was just into rock music, so she should just stick with that, but turns out she’s actually doing so well as Veronica. Like she was basically written for her. “What are you writing about?” after a brief run through of Dead Girl Walking, they both sat back down in their chairs. It was just a rehearsal with the two of them that they hastily organised after realising that they never rehearsed this song yet. But Danny was a little preoccupied with his thoughts as he continued to write down on his notepad in the virtually empty music room.“Uhh, I’m making dot points on things that Courtney would like,” he fidgeted with his pen. Sharon came to his side, looking over his shoulder.“Oh, her and Dan broke up, right?” she asked nonchalantly. “‘But I’m a cheerleader’? That’s a lesbian movie though.” He suddenly shut the notebook and completely dismissed her comment.“Yeah, it sucks. She’s upset about it so I’m trying to make her feel better,” he continued. “I heard from Alaska that she apparently cheated on Dan or something,” Danny widened his eyes. “I mean, none of it is confirmed and ‘Lasky fully supports Courtney and says, if anyone, he’s cheating but-”And then all the sounds began to blur. Because it clicked. It all clicked. Anger washed over his gaze.“I need to go,” he nimbly crammed all his beginnings into his bag and left the room.Danny left Sharon a little speechless as he ran home. He didn't realise how quickly he could actually run because he completely felt himself submerging into the air. It felt a little refreshing, but his body was still achingly hot from anger. He slammed his fist against Roy’s front door, his heart starting to catch up with his unathleticism. Okay, so he was a little unfit. But at least he could run to a certain extent. He heard a groan from the other side of the door. And then he slowly opened it, eyeing at Danny with wrinkled brows. Danny almost gasped. He was holding an ice pack to his right eye, and his cheek seemed to be stained a purple. A deep, shaded purple. One that dyed even the furthest creases of his face. He seemed incredibly pissed off, his body curled over tiresomely. The younger boy felt a little more guilty at that.“What do you want Danny?” his voice cracked, his free hand holding onto the door frame. “You fucking told Dan, didn't you?!” his voice was still strong and firm like he imagined it to be, but he didn’t quite imagine how bitter it tasted in his mouth. He tried his hardest not to let the sympathy get the better of him. “What are you talking about?” he moaned, rubbing his temples.“About Courtney! About her,” he began to whisper. “Sexuality.”Danny suddenly heard footsteps emerging from inside Roy’s house. And a call from an incredibly familiar voice that made him choke.
“Roy? Who is it?”
Max strolled into the room, instantly stopping when his eyes met with Danny's.“Max?” he nearly shouted it from shock. “Danny?” he raised an eyebrow. “What are you doing here?”“I-I could ask you the same thing,”What surprised him most was the fact that Roy was still...you know, homophobic. That night. That night spoke one thousand words and Danny would never forget it. And Max is-“I was going to practise a few things with Roy for the musical but he didn’t show up so I was worried,” he started, Danny blinking back into reality. “And obviously...things happened,” he gestured over to him. “So I decided to make some vegetable soup so he would feel better.”He smiled. Danny always felt better whenever Max smiled like that. He was adorable.He didn’t really see himself actually in Roy’s house a few minutes ago, but here he was, eating Max’s soup along with the both of them. It was quiet for a few moments because of that gunk of awkwardness that they built up. “I feel like I’m missing out on something…” Max was the one to start as he took a mouthful of soup. “This is really good, by the way,” Danny smiled over to him, clearly pushing away his comment. “It’s just as good as everyone says it is.”“Aww, thanks Danny,” he lightly patted his shoulder. “But I’m serious. Is there something going on here?”“No, there’s nothing,” Roy dismissed borderline coldly.“Okay,” the tallest boy lowered his bowl onto the table. “I guess I have to just leave.”“Wait Max,” Danny hurried. “I mean to the other room, don’t worry,” he laughed.“No you don’t need to,” the brunette held onto his sleeve.“No, I am.”And then there were the two of them. It was more awkward. And it gave Danny pure paranoia. But Max obviously knew that something was up. Danny wondered if it was too obvious. Too obvious that him and Roy are going through something. He gulped and looked over to him, half his face completely bruised.“W-What happened?” he gestured over to him without an actual clear indication of what he was talking about. “Something really interesting happened actually…” he began, his words sounding like it should be amusing but it was more cold and distant. “With Dan.”“With Dan?”“What did you expect?”“I was sure you outed Courtney…? Because her and Dan-”“Broke up? Yeah,” he shoved away his empty bowl. “It’s a much better story than that.”“Are you going to tell me what it is?”“It’s an interesting story actually…”And then Danny felt his body tremble from complete guilt.
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
“W-What do you mean you didn’t “out” Courtney?” he bit down on his lip. “A-And plus, what’s with this cheating thing? Her and Will were never a thing.”“Well this,” he ran his hand gently over his black eye then down to his cheek. “Is from Dan. It was to do with Courtney, yeah, but it wasn’t to do with her sexuality.”“Why aren’t you just fucking telling me Roy? You’re dragging this out for so-”“I told him that we hooked up,”Danny scoffed from disbelief.“W-What…?” he rubbed his eyes. “What did you say?”“I told him that we hooked up,” he repeated, his voice stale and borderline rotten. “So he would break up with her.”“W-Why would you do that? You’re clearly lying,” he shook his head.“Court will never have the guts to break up with him. And obviously she would've had to to actually be happy,” he reasoned. “So he had to break up with her instead.”“I’m so confused,” he rubbed his temples. “What’s with this plan? And why is this so sudden? I’m so confused.”“Because Courtney full heartedly believes that being happy comes from a relationship like this,” he explained. “And that’s a fucking lie. Being with an asshole just because everyone else thinks he’s hot will never make her happy. And I know that to be truly, truly happy, she would need to forget about that jerk and go towards a better goal.”Danny sat there for a moment, his head feeling lightheaded. He felt like he was dreaming and he imagined all of this happening as a coping mechanism or something for him and Roy earlier. But it wasn’t. This was real. And he was so thankful.“T-Thanks, I guess,” he said in a low voice. “I didn’t know that you would do something like that for Courtney and...it’s nice but…” he sighed. “You should tell her the truth. She deserves it and I think she’d appreciate it.”Roy gave a gentle smile.“I will eventually…” his fingertips lightly touched the folds of his eyes, the swollen up, discoloured parts of it. “Maybe after this heals. Because she’ll absolutely freak if she found out how I got this.”“Fair enough,” Danny reasoned. “She really wouldn’t have wanted you to get hurt just for her.”“Yeah, but it was no big deal,” he shrugged. “I do really love her, and care about her. It’s a risk that I’m willing to take to make sure that, she slowly learns to love herself.”Danny grinned, feeling so grateful for this action. The older boy shuffled in a little closer, his arms opening for an inviting hug, but the heavy feeling in his chest returned, making Danny move away without even thinking. “U-Umm I can’t,” he denied his admiration. “I still respect you as a friend and everything but as long as you're homophobic-”Max, figuring that he gave them enough time, began to wander back into the room again but instantly stopped when Danny said the word. He felt a little uncomfortable immediately.“I can’t do this,” Danny shook his head. “I don’t want to mend everything we used to have together.”Roy swallowed hard, and grinned stiffly.“O-Oh, okay…” he bit down on his lip. “Fair enough I guess…” before Danny could continue, he cut him off to reason with him. “But I’m learning. I’m trying to become better and more understanding and-”“I know Roy,” he soothingly brushed his hand over his knee. “But don’t forget about what I said about Max,” he reminded, the grey haired boy shivering by the corner as he hid. “He’s an incredibly special person to me,” the tallest boy gave a small gasp into his palm, trying to contain it. “Don’t hurt him. Because you will never see the end of it.”Max brightened at the comment, biting down on his lip incredibly hard to contain his ever growing smile. It felt amazing. The wall cooled him down just a tad, and he really needed that. Really, really. He couldn't really believe Danny’s effects on his life. He somehow changed him as a person without him even realising. “I understand…” he pursed his lips. “Talking to Max this afternoon made me realising something,” he admitted. “He’s an amazing person. And what I said that night...it was wrong. I was being a fucking asshole because there is no way I can call someone fucking gross. Like, what was I thinking? It was so ignorant and stupid and absolutely uncalled for,” he was nearly shouting with his own passion. “And I take back everything I said. Every single word. Because it was completely wrong of me to say that about someone, and so many people around the world before even knowing them as a person. It was insensitive, it was disgusting….I’m the really disgusting one. I’m the one who’s disgusting, and vile and I’m so so sorry Danny.”The younger boy froze. “I’m so so sorry for saying everything I did because I’m a truly vile person and I can’t believe I said all those things,” he sniffed. Danny was shocked at Roy’s state. “I take back everything I said, I’m so sorry Danny.”Even Max was in a complete state of shock around the corner, his eyes intently watching over the revelation. They watched Roy eventually break down, his hands covering his face as he began to cry.“Roy I…” he came a little closer, wrapping his arms around him. “Roy don’t be so down, please,” he raised his gaze. “I didn’t think-”“I’m so sorry,” he hiccuped.“Don’t beat yourself up about it Roy,” he brushed aside his locks. “Please don’t. I know you’re trying to do better, and I know you’re trying to learn and that means everything to me Roy. Trust me. And it’ll mean so much to so many people. And you’re going to get to a point where you overcome this. And overcome all this stupid brainwashing this fucking town cursed you with. And it’ll be alright,” he reassured, feeling his eyes fog up a little. “You’re gonna be alright Roy. Trust me. And I’m going to help you through this.”“R-Really?” he sniffed. Danny didn’t know how he felt about Roy being so sensitive and real like this. It was so...different. So raw and so new. He pitied him. “Of course Roy. Why wouldn’t I support you? You mean the world to me,” he brightened, his gaze softening at his state.“You too Danny,” he began to move a little closer so his hand was resting against the younger boy’s knee. Danny felt his whole body freeze at that moment. The way he gazed up at him made him look so sensitive and soft. It was a different side to Roy he barely ever saw. Even with all these years of friendship under their belts. The older boy chuckled lightly, regaining a little colour onto his face.“You know Danny,” he started, repositioning himself to sit up slightly. “You have a weird effect on me. You make me realise all these different things I wouldn’t have realised on my own, and you have this amazing point of view...I appreciate you. I don’t appreciate you enough because you’ve always been so great and I’ve been an idiot because... I began letting you go as high school started.”Those were the words Danny always wanted to hear. Always, always. Because he never really accepted that Roy liked him much, maybe because he had a hard time showing it sometimes. But he...loved it, really, when he said stuff like this to him.He felt his eyes water just a tad as he placed his hand onto his shoulder. His mind went blank again. That state he went into when his body took over his thoughts too, and he couldn't think properly for himself. He could say it was reflexes, in a way. He always wanted his first kiss to be Roy, and even though, now, it’s his second kiss, it’s just as amazing as he imagined. Probably more, since this was now a reality. It’s different to him and Max. It was like they collided together perfectly, and it made Danny realise all the sensations he had been missing in his life before that. It was indescribable. Soulmates aren’t something he believed in, but this was something. Something surreal and breathtaking. Something that made him speechless for the first time in his life and made him feel both calm and giddy. It wasn’t anything that he could put to words, because you needed to experience it to fully understand the meaning behind it. If that made sense.As he parted, he watched Roy’s eyes glisten, like the universe was sparkling in his gaze. He looked dazed, like he was dreaming or he just woke up from a soothing slumber, and he looked up to see some saviour by his side. Roy’s hands clamped onto Danny’s sleeves, pulling him towards him again for another kiss. The younger boy nearly resisted out of shock, but instantly melted when he felt it again. Those sparks. Those perfect sparks.Danny wasn't a believer of fate, but he couldn't help but to feel that this was meant to be. That his life lead to this moment and this was a turning point. He felt like he was the protagonist of his own life for once, and he was getting what he deserved. Then there was a gasp.And they flung apart from the new breath of air that breathed into the room. Max had his hands by his lips, and his knees bent as he took rigid steps back. He sprung towards the door, grabbing his bag quickly by the entrance before dashing out. Danny’s chest fell. “Oh my god,” Roy’s jaw dropped. “I forgot that-”“I’m gonna go get him,” Danny, like it was a protective reflex, grabbed his own stuff and chased after Max, leaving Roy gobsmacked on the sofa as he traced over his lips again. The young brunette watched his friend dash down the street, face covered in his hands and bag messily swung over his shoulder as he hastily scattered away. Danny gave a long sigh. Whether this was positive or negative, he didn’t really know. Both. An overwhelming sense of mixed emotions arose from his chest. He stared towards the open door of Roy’s house, then back at his own. He didn’t really know what to think of what happened. He was delighted. Happy. More than that. He didn’t want anything more but...his pessimistic self started to take over his body again. What’s going to happen from here? Will Roy ever bring it up? Will something happen to them?There were endless possibilities and Danny didn’t know what was going to happen from here.All he knew was that they were meant to be together, because there was no one else but Roy that could make him scream like that internally. To make him feel like he actually lived the most of his life without the other half of him that he did need. But he knew that he couldn't go back in either. Because he already knew what was going to happen. He would make excuses, and Danny would fluster and do the same. Because they're both socially awkward and they don't know what to do in a situation like that. So he gulped, let the bag sit a little lower than he was used to, and walked to his house, his back a little straighter and his walk a little primmer than he's used to.
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
Max gave a long exhale. It’s Wednesday afternoon; the middle of the week, but he really wished that it was Friday already. That day in particular felt like it dragged on for much too long. “Am I just really unlikeable?” Max mumbled, looking down at his lap.Kurtis was next to him. No one else. Just Kurtis. It was a weird pair, in a way, but he seemed to be the only person Max felt comfortable enough to talk to at this point. It wasn't like he hated Jason or Matt, obviously. He loved them, but were they going to help him? In a situation that they don't understand at all?“You’re super likeable Max,” he answered back, his voice a little wary from the shock of his story. It was sudden. He knew the taller boy seemed a little off that day. He barely talked, and he didn't even bother to talk back to Kurtis when he said some snarky comment. So he was the one who actually asked Max out, from worry, and he was surprised to find him quickly saying yes, denying Matt’s help along with Jason’s. Kurtis obviously liked him. Him and Max were an odd pair but they got along. Kurtis just found it odd that Max wanted his help over everyone else's.And then he got told the story of Danny. And Roy. And the moment Max felt his heartbreak. And Kurtis gulped and then understood. “Do you really think that?” he whimpered almost helplessly. He fell back onto Kurtis’s sofa, feeling his body collapse into the fabric. “Of course I do,” he consoled. “Honestly, I think you’re one of the most likeable people I know. You’re smart, you’re caring, incredibly kind, you know exactly what to say to make everyone feel better-”“Then why does no one ever like me back…?” Kurtis pursed his lips at the answer. “First, it was Matt, and now it’s Danny and nothing works out,” he exhaled. “And they always end up finding someone else. Someone that is better, nicer, better looking and they end up being super compatible...and...and they’re virtually perfect for each other!”His rant made Kurtis swallow hard. He felt bad. Really bad. He clutched onto his own knee harshly and looked up at him with a sympathetic gaze.“Max…” he began, his voice quivering a little. “I get you…”The grey haired boy’s eyes widened a tad.“What do you mean?” he shuffled a little closer for comfort’s sake.“You think Matt finding Jason was hard?” he gave a stiff chuckle. “Jason finding Matt was so much harder. He found a hunky footballer who was not only gay, but he had to also be so hot. And popular. And literally the guy that Jason always wanted.”“So you liked…?”“Eh,” he shrugged. “I guess so but it was never a proper thing.”“Same as mine,”They exchanged small smiles. They didn’t know what they were really smiling about. Maybe the fact that they had something in common for once. Other than being gay.“We used to make out though,”“Okay not same as mine,” Kurtis snorted at his comment. “...have you had your first kiss?”“It was you Kurtis,” he answered with a chuckle.“Oh yeah,” he pulled a face at the memory. “Forgot about that.”“Who was yours?” “Jason,” he answered somewhat stiffly. “Was it amazing?”“No,” he laughed. “To be honest, it’s probably not any better than yours,” he crossed his arms. “I wanted it to be more, at that point, but I don’t think it ever was. And it wasn’t ever supposed to be. And that’s fine,” he exhaled. “He still means more than anything to me. It doesn't have to be romantic and it’s something that I realised through the years.”“But don’t you want it to be? W-Well used to?” he asked, his lips sagging.“Of course I did. I wanted it to work so badly,” he gave a small smile towards Max to try and cheer him up. “But I guess it lacked that spark in a way. I don’t know. I don’t know what love is yet so I can’t make a clear judgement on it but,” he shrugged. “I wonder sometimes if that’s why I hated Matt the first time I properly met him. I didn’t really mean to do it…”“I know you didn’t,” Max placed his hand on top of Kurtis’s. “I was the same to Jason, don’t worry.”“Is it normal to still feel guilty about it even though I don’t hate him anymore?” the brunette asked quietly. “I feel the exact same way. If that makes you feel any better,” they exchanged grins. Kurtis exhaled deeply from relief.“But about Danny now,” he reminded. Max’s heart sunk a little. “Just know that everyone has crushes in their life. It’s completely normal and most of them don’t end up going down that well. Trust me. And you’re going to eventually find someone that will adore you. And love you. And you’ll realise how silly all the past crushes were.”“Can I be honest…?” he started, his hand tightening around Kurtis’s. The brunette gripped back. “The crush...doesn't feel silly, right now.”“Trust me, you’ll look back on Matt and Danny, and laugh. And when we’re all older, we’ll all see each other again, with our super bomb husbands, and we’re all gonna have a dinner party together. I see Matt and Jason wondering if they want a kid. You’ll probably already have one who’s super smart and musically talented,” the taller boy snickered. “I’ll just have a dog. Maybe two,” he laughed. “And you’ll be like “Wow gee I’m so happy with my husband now. And Danny’s happy now with another guy and I don’t even care. We’re still friends”. I can guarantee it.”He gazed towards him reluctantly. “Promise?” he raised his hand from their grasp, his pinky sticking up. It was a cliche, but it seemed like the glimmer of hope he needed at that moment. Kurtis smiled towards him warmly.“Promise. Wholeheartedly,” he wrapped his pinky around his, widening his smile. “If not, you can totally get mad at me when we’re older.”“I don’t know,” he glanced down, his smile still present. “I believe in what you said. I don’t think I need to get mad at you.”Kurtis chuckled, wrapping his arms around him to reel him into a tight hug. Max felt at home in his grasp. He didn’t exactly know why but it felt so comfortable. So homey.“Hey Max?” the brunette parted. “Yeah?”“Can you stay here tonight?” he asked. Max brightened. “Of course,” “Good,” he brushed down his shoulder. “Because it wasn’t actually a question. It was a demand.”Max bursted out into laughter.“Well, I want to stay. Definitely.”
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Danny was going through something mentally. Well, he had been for a while, ever since that Roy thing happened, but it was getting harder and harder for him to deal with his own mental state everyday. It was mostly because the thoughts were getting overwhelming, taking over every other thought, like what he was going to do after class with his friends, what he was going to eat, or how he was actually going to finish this geography assignment he hadn’t even started yet.So, his only resolution seemed to actually talk to Roy about it. Aka his biggest fear. Aka something he did not want to do whatsoever. But he felt like he needed to do it. To get it off of his chest and to feel better about it, so he did. He showed up at the end of the day, his bag feeling heavier than he remembered, and met up with Roy at the music room right next to his locker. “H-Hey Roy,” the older boy was already waiting for him there, his hands resting against the piano keys. “Hey Danny,” he was cold. It made Danny’s legs quiver for a moment.
He couldn't do it. He just couldn't.
“I just wanted to talk about the musical…” lies. It’s what he did when he was overwhelmed. Pussy.“Oh,” Roy didn’t seem that startled though. It was sort of like he was obliged to say it so he did. Pause.Now it was Danny’s turn to say his lines, right? But he didn’t. He just stood there, his nails starting to scratch the fabric of his bag strap.
Say something.
“Or is it about what happened?” that was obvious to Roy too, of course, but Danny was still surprised that he wanted to mention it. “Because I want to talk about that.”“Really?” he blurted out. “I-I mean…”“Let’s forget about what happened,” he cut him off completely, both verbally and mentally. “I-It was nothing. It was a mistake that I didn’t mean to make and I feel bad for taking advantage of you or something I-”“N-No it was okay,” more than okay, in reality. But Danny wouldn’t say that. “Everyone makes mistakes…”“Yeah, thanks umm,” he shook his head. “Thanks for understanding. I guess. I didn’t think you’d take it well or anything.”“No, no it’s okay. I understand…” he pursed his lips. “Shit happens. We don’t even think sometimes when we’re in the moment.”“Exactly. Thanks for getting it,” he grabbed his own bag. “I didn’t want it to be some big deal or anything.”Danny was sort of used to this feeling now. Heartbreak. It happened to him all the time, virtually, right? He laughed at that thought. Maybe Sad Boy was a good nickname for him after all, even though he didn’t like to admit it. He wondered why life liked to tease him like that. It just wasn’t fair. It was never fucking fair. “Yeah, I just wanted to say umm…” Danny trailed off, his head too clogged up with hurt and upset that he couldn't even form sentences.“Oh? About the musical?” he reminded.“Yeah, yeah,” he fell a few steps back. “I can’t be apart of it anymore. S-Sorry I didn’t want to…”He dashed out, not finishing his sentence. Not knowing how to finish his lines. It didn’t matter what he said and what he was going to say because it wasn’t about that. It was about what happened. About how close he was to getting something he wanted for years, and then it ended up being worse than it ever was. Not only did he lose it, but he lost everything in some sense. Lost everything that they had, in some sense. It kept on happening for him.Yeah, Danny’s been an unlucky person. But it’s never gone to this point. He exhaled deeply, trying to calm down his pulse as he brought the bag straps closer to his chest. It ached like hell but...this was reality. Reality was, this was never meant to be.
“Danny! Wait!”
Roy came running after him, panting, his feet falling on top of each other as he reached out towards him. Instantly lunging towards him, their lips crashed together. The older boy grabbed onto his upper arm, adjusting the force to just graze their lips together softly. He parted to embrace him tightly, his bag dropping onto the ground carelessly.Danny felt his body completely fall over and collapse into his grasp. Exactly what he wanted to do at that moment. He couldn't tell whether he was absolutely delusional or not. “Sorry,” he breathed out heavily. “I-”"No,” the younger boy mumbled into his neck. “This isn’t bad. At all. This is…”“Great,” he rested his hands by his waist comfortably. “I know. I agree.”Danny felt his whole body buzz. Like he could fly at this point. He smiled widely.“I want to keep this secret though,” Danny blurted, that sense of insecurity still penetrating through that thick wall of dreamy perfection.“Same,” he brushed up and down his back. “Glad we’re on the same page.”Danny chuckled.“Yeah,” he bit down on his lip. “Not even Courtney?"“Not even Courtney,” he answered back, his voice almost a whisper.His arms fell to his sides, like they were lifelessly flopping to his legs. And then there was a pause. And they looked at each other for another moment until they bursted out into laughter. A satisfying, belly laugh that had Danny toppled over onto Roy for support. “That was,” he tried to speak through his fit of laughter. “Oh god! I don’t even know what to say.”“I don’t think we need to say anything,” he nudged him lightly.
“So is this…?” he gestured in the space between them. “A…?”
“Thing?” he shrugged. “I guess so.”
The way he smirked towards him made Danny fluster like crazy. It made him feel so much more...happy, knowing that Roy liked him back. It was crazy. It felt crazy. All of this. Surreal. Completely surreal. His dreams came true? That was cliche but...he couldn't say it in any other way.
He confidently took his hand, felt how hot it was, and excitedly walked down the hall with him. It was empty. But it didn’t feel empty. It was completely filled with over excitement and nervousness for what was to come. With anticipation for the future ahead of them. And calmness for how far they’ve come. Together and as individuals. Danny looked over at him one more time, and watched his smile continue to brighten. He felt happy at that moment. It was one of those moments that made him feel like they were immortal. No. They were immortal. This was immortal. And this; Danny and Roy, would never die.
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Courtney never imagined Willam to be so soft in bed. Okay. That sounded much worse than she wanted it to. When they were making out in bed? Okay. Still not tame and SFW, but still.Days like these were becoming quite normal, like it was some sort of routine now, but Courtney wasn’t complaining at all. It was amazing, actually. They had cheer practice every afternoon now that the competition was approaching incredibly quickly. And even though that was super stressful, every practice was going well. Jason was back, which meant stability in the human pyramid was restored. Hell yes. And the routine was sharp and together now, which made Courtney so happy.And with Alaska gone to study or fuck Sharon, or whatever (Courtney didn’t really know) that meant that she could hang out with Willam. The icing on the cake. Well, the icing that costed more than the cake because it’s so good. But still. “Don’t be stupid Court, you’ll do great in the final position,” See, Courtney had never been in a relationship which she wanted to actually be in until then. Even though this wasn’t an official relationship. Anyways, she wondered whether it was normal to just talk through sessions like this. They’d kiss, do something and talk all at once. Like it was casual. Like they were just gal pals, and all gals obviously made out with their friends while gossiping. Right?“I don’t know, I’m still stressed out about it,” Courtney explained, feeling Willam kiss down her neck softly.“Wait,” she glanced up. “You and Dan are definitely, definitely not a thing right?” the blonde nodded. “Oh good. Anyways, no, you’ll do great.”“Why did you ask?” she sat up to lightly nudge Willam away from her. The other girl sighed. It made Courtney a little nervous.“Look Court, what we’re doing here,” she gestured. “It’s not a you and Dan situation,” the other girl parted her lips to reply but she stopped herself. “It’s not a relationship like that.”“I-I know,” she wished it wasn’t true though. “I get it.”“It’s not gonna go anywhere and I was just…” she rubbed the back of her neck. “Sorry for making it all serious suddenly. I-”“No, don’t worry about it,” she reassured with a smile. “I don’t take it personally…”“I know you don’t. I just didn’t want you to have the wrong idea…” Courtney knew Willam very well. Not only had they hung out with each other virtually every moment of everyday for 3 years now, but Willam was easy to read. She had particular habits that Courtney could recognise. One of those, was talking and making excuses all too much whenever she was nervous. “I mean, it won’t go anywhere, right? Like your parents would hate it. Everyone around here will hate it. And if that happens, where would we go? Where would we stay?”“I get it Will-”“And would everyone know eventually? Or is it going to be a secret forever?”“I didn’t think about any of that…” Courtney muttered, feeling the wall stick to her back. “I guess I didn’t really want to think about it.”It’s been two weeks since their first kiss but, she hadn’t thought about it. Thinking about it was too hard. It meant the future. It meant more things to overcome. And that just stressed her out even more than it did then. Willam suddenly shook her head, grumbling to herself. Courtney knew that this meant that she was going to doubt herself. She does this a lot, but Courtney always tries to step in before she acts on it.“I-I can’t do this anymore,” she groaned. “Cheer comps are coming up, and studies are getting harder,” she rubbed her temples. “This is just another thing that makes my life harder and I don’t want that.”“I understand…” she mumbled. “I honestly get you. Completely. I don't want to make you any more stressed. Obviously. Because I care about you and that's the last thing I'd wanna do," Willam looked over to her with a reluctant smile. "I care about you so much Will. You know I've always have.""I know," she eased towards her a little."So obviously we can call this all off and we can go back to just being regular friends," she subtly bit down on her own lip. "And that'll be okay with me too but...""But...?"Courtney gazed up. "I was just wondering if this is a thing...?”She glanced down, trying to avoid her gaze. Probably because she could've guessed the answer right then and there by just looking at Willam’s face. And she was dreading it.“Officially, no,” she shuffled even closer and cheekily raised her view with her thumb. “But in a way, yeah.”Courtney let herself ease into a chuckle, even though it hurt her throat a bit because she didn’t want to be falling for Willam in the way she was. Currently. And for a while. She never understood how her own brain worked. She somehow wanted Willam, so much, still, even though she’s flat out telling her that they’re not a thing and they probably shouldn't be. “Calling it love is too easy though,” Willam made her snap into reality. She blushed at the comment. “But I’m in love with you in every possible way. Maybe less on the romantic.”Courtney pouted. Somewhat jokingly, somewhat seriously.“Why?” “Maybe,” she rocked back on her heels. “I’m a little scared of loving you in a romantic way because that means that I can never avoid having feelings for you.”The cheer captain bursted out into laughter, not being able to stop herself from wrapping her arms around her neck and reeling her in tightly. “What’s so bad about that, huh?” she jokingly asked, rocking left to right.“It means that I accidentally fell in love with a vegan, which would mentally ruin me for life,” she snickered back, planting a sweet kiss by her lips. “Do I still count as a vegan if I eat you out?”Willam lost her shit and gasped.“Are you fucking kidding me Court?!”“What?” she blinked. “I’m just asking!”Willam groaned into her neck, rolling her eyes.“What did you do with my innocent Courtney?”“Oh, she’s still here,” she piped to. “She likes to have a little fun sometimes.”“Jesus Court you’re killing me here. You need to stop!”
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“How do you like your grilled cheese babe?” Matt and Jason were in the cheerleader’s backyard, where they laid out a large pleated mat and brought out a picnic basket. This was their version of a picnic. It was a way to still be in the closet but still have a cute, romantic date once in a while. “It’s great,” Jason laughed, partially at his attempt to make food, and partially because of the setting.You could say it was more for the feel of having a cute date, instead of the practicality, because they made all this picnic food together in the kitchen just then, and yet they’re sitting out here like they just stumbled out onto the park on a nice summer afternoon and they’re apart of a picturesque 60s theme aesthetic. You know, with the sunlight beaming down on them, and glistening smiles, and a lazy breeze.“I’ve always been the best at making those,” Matt smiled, leaning back on his arm. “I know babe,” he smiled back. “But you can’t cook anything else.”“Eh, I’ll live off grilled cheeses for the rest of my life,” he snickered. “You’re cholesterol will be so shit though,” he brushed the crumbs off of his fingers and grinned towards him. “Good luck living by yourself.”"Well you'll be living with me,” they both laughed. “You better know how to cook.”“I like to think that I’m pretty good,” Jason wondered when they came to the conclusion of living together. And how it went down because he doesn't remember at all. It’s sort of like they didn’t talk about it out loud or anything, and instead, they just decided that they would. Because there’s no other logical reason.“You are pretty good actually,” he agreed. “Nothing compared to Max though.”“Yeah, but that’s because no one can beat his vegetable soup,” Jason popped a chip into his mouth from a hastily opened packet. “It always makes me feel better. It tastes like nostalgia and childhood,” he grinned to himself. His boyfriend peered up at him with a small spark of jealousy.“B-But I’ll get better,” he blurted, shuffling a little closer to him. Matt raised an eyebrow towards him. “You don’t need to be worried or anything babe,” he softened into a gentle laugh. “You know I’ve been friends with him for so long.”“I-I know,” he stammered. “I don’t think I’ll ever be that good at making soup but-”“Jason,” he stated, running his hands over his hair. “It’s okay. Don’t worry about it. There’s literally nothing to be worried about,” he helped Jason sit up so he could comfortably prop him up underneath his grasp. “Don’t ever forget that I love you dearly. There’s nothing I will change about you, okay? Don’t feel self-conscious over something as little as not being able to make fucking soup,” he snickered lightly. “And plus you’re a good baker, so it’s not even like you can’t cook.”Jason laughed.“I’m a bit scared...” he admitted. Matt exhaled.“Please don’t tell me it’s because of the overdose because that’s nothing to do with you Jason. It’s not your fault in any way,” he explained. “I can’t help but to feel like it is though,” he gazed up at him. “I feel like I’m not enough or something. I don’t know.”“You’re enough. You’re more than enough. Don’t ever let your thoughts make you believe otherwise,” he grinned towards him supportively. “C’mere.”The exchanged a sweet kiss that made Jason smile wider.“I am a good baker, aren’t I?” he chuckled.“Yes, yes you are,” Matt ran his hand down his shoulder. “I absolutely love your chocolate cake. It’s the best.”“Aww Kurtis says that too,” he teased, making Matt twitch his brows a little.“Haha, very funny Jason,” he joked. “I love how seriously Kurtis takes himself though sometimes. It’s hilarious.”“I like to think that he's a professional in making,”“A professional…?”“I don’t know, something gay,” they both laughed. “Like a fashion designer. He can design couture dresses. Oh damn, that would be amazing. I’d love to do that.”“With the 1950s silhouette?” “Obviously!” he chortled. “You know me so well.”“Of course babe,” he ran his fingers through the ends of his hair. “You’re my best friend.” “Friend zoned,” he called playfully.“You know what I mean,” he grinned. “I haven’t known you since the day I was born or anything like that, but it feels like I’ve known you in a past life or something. It’s amazing.”“I couldn't agree more,” he smiled back, pecking him on the cheek. “But let’s be honest, it’s not even like knowing someone from the moment you’re born is good for relationships. Look at Danny and Roy.”Matt groaned and slapped himself across the face.“Do not get me started on Roy. That asshole,” he drawled out.“I hate that guy so much. You have no idea,” he complained. “Homophobic asshole. And I thought he was funny and nice.”If Danny was there at that moment, he would’ve wanted to cut them off. To interrupt them and tell them the truth, and explain what happened, and that it was okay now. But obviously he was absent. And they were fuming. “Me too,” Matt agreed. “Do you think Danny still has a thing for him?”“No way, if he does, I’m gonna lose it,” he gestured wildly. “You don’t really think so though, right?”Matt paused to think about it. “No…?” His voice hitched. “I mean, it’s Danny. He’s an unpredictable person.”“True that,”“He’s bound to have a soft spot for him, knowing him. Argh, that means we can’t trash his house or anything to get back at him,” he grumbled childishly. “Yeah, let’s not go back to that babe. Remember what happened last time?” He reminded. “At Brad’s? We didn’t even get caught,” Jason replied with a reasoning look, which made him think for a moment. “...but we did nearly get caught. And Max broke a window. And we vandalised property. And Kurtis nearly crashed the car again. And-““We also dyed their house blue,” he added. “That too,” he reached over for the can of soda and cracked open one. “I can’t believe we didn’t get caught.”“Me either,” he took a sip of Matt’s drink. “So is it a ‘no’ to pranking Roy?” He pouted. “Geez, how old are you?” He chuckled. “It’s for the greater good, I swear,” he smiled. “It’s for our dear friend who’s in love with someone, who is not only straight, but also homophobic.”“Is he straight though? He’s a theatre kid,”“Now that you mention it…” he shook his head. “Either way. Homophobe. Let’s egg his house.”They exchanged conflicting looks for a moment, like they were trying to wrinkle their brows until it would make the other collapse. But with one swift movement from Matt that allowed him to successfully land a peck by Jason’s lips, he instantly won.“Fine,” the cheerleader caved in. “But, Kurtis has to be in on it too.”“Fine,” he negotiated reluctantly. “But not Max. I’m pretty sure he’s been mentally scarred since he broke that window.”“And not Danny. Obviously,” they nodded in unison. “Great. No food colouring this time?”Matt rolled his eyes.“Obviously not. That was crazy,” he groaned. “No more surprises this time. Okay babe?”“Of course.”And they somehow went from a cute picnic to planning something that would break Danny’s heart.
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“You’re flat Danny,” Roy complained jokingly, his fingers lightly brushing over the piano keys. The younger boy flicked his head back and rolled his eyes. They were at musical practise with just the two of them. Well, it was supposed to be. But it wasn’t really working out at this point. They seemed to be much more dedicated to just messing around. The older boy threw a ruler at him, Danny just missing it with a swift turn. He gasped overdramatically.“That could have killed me!” he shrieked playfully, dashing over to him. He jumped onto him, wrapping his arms around his neck to virtually suffocate him. Roy gasped for laughter.“Well I didn’t! Did I?” he choked out, nudging Danny away lightly. “Wow, you’re the one who’s gonna kill me now.”He bursted out into laughter, letting his hands comfortable rest by his shoulders. Rocking back and forth on his heels, Danny found himself softly humming some familiar tune. It felt nice. This whole thing. Like an oddly humble date in some way. Roy melted back into his grasp, smiling up at him. “Wrong song Danny,” he playfully poked at his cheek, gently brushing down to his chin. “That’s ‘Danny Boy’.”Danny inhaled slightly at the comment. The first thing that came to his mind was Max. He hadn’t talked to him at all. About what happened or in general. Just in the group sometimes but they never locked eye contact or had a one on one conversation. He seemed to completely remove himself from Danny’s side and now to Kurtis’s instead. The younger boy felt a little replaced and ditched in a way. Even though he did do something wrong. In some sense.“What’s wrong Danny?” Roy asked tentatively, watching his face melt a little. He shook his head.“N-Nothing,” he grinned it off, taking a chair to sit right next to him, a little closer than usual. Roy smiled. “You’re lying,” he said simply, clasping their hands together caringly. Danny chuckled. “How did you know?”“Because I know you way too well,” he prided himself in that knowledge of Danny. Both of them knew that. “Anyways, why did you react like that? I didn’t say something wrong, did I?”“What? No,” he denied. “It just made me think about something.”“And that something is…?”“Max,” he confessed. “He played the song for his solo performance.”Roy acknowledged his statement with a simple hum, and then a sigh, and he proceeded to grip onto his hand a little tighter. Danny questioned him with a look of confusion.“Hm, thought so,” he said to himself somewhat quietly. The brunette gazed towards him with even more confusion.“What?” “Max,” he began. “He likes you.”“W-What?” he seemed genuinely taken aback. “We’re just friends-”“You’ve always been so oblivious,” he snickered. “Cute.”“T-Thanks?” he blushed a little. “But what are you talking about?”“Everything's been piling up through the weeks. I mean, he used to talk about you all the time. He would start by talking about the group, but then he’d go to just you. And that’s it. I mean I didn’t mind,” he shrugged as Danny laughed with flattery. “But still. And he joined the musical because you wanted him to be apart of it. And he does a oboe solo dedicated to you-”“And we kissed,”“And you kissed and-” he stopped. “Wait what?”“Wait what?” he mimicked. There was a breath of silence until Danny bursted out into a fit of overjoy and amused laughter. Roy just sat there. Stunned.“Are you fucking kidding?” Roy snapped, but Danny brushed it aside quickly with laughs.“No,” he choked out through the thick coats in his chest. “It was a one time thing though! It wasn’t even serious.”“Danny!” he whined. “Oh come on, was he your first kiss?”“Maybe,”“Danny!” he repeated. “Was it his first kiss?”“No,” he shook his head and calmed down a little. “It was Kurtis.”“Kurtis?!” he rubbed his temples. “Jesus, who’s actually straight in your group?”“Me,” Roy shoved him playfully. “I hate you,”“I love you too.”Roy groaned lazily and collapsed onto him from tiresomness.“You’re amazing Danny,” he breathed out, bringing him in tightly towards his chest. “Why am I always such a dick to you?”“I like dicks,” Roy rolled his eyes.“Jesus stop it,” he yelled weakly. “Sorry,” he rested his arms around his body. He peered down to see him calmly resting against him. “You make me so happy.”“Couldn't agree more,” they exchanged small smiles. “Why didn’t I do anything earlier?”“Yeah, why didn’t you?” he played along, brushing down his locks that seemed to be growing out a little. Danny liked it though. “I’ve liked you forever.”“I’ve liked you forever too,” he sat up a little to line up their eye contact. “I’m just a stupid pussy.”“I know,” he cupped his cheek softly.”But you’re my stupid pussy.”“That sounded stupid,”“I always sound stupid.”Roy leaned over to him and kissed him lightly, holding onto him ever so sweetly. Danny parted and bit down on his lip as he blinked back into reality.“You’re cute Danny,” Roy gave a light wink over to him before chuckling. “I’m never gonna let Max take you away from me.”He lightly chuckled.“That won’t ever be a thing, don't worry,” he reassured. “Do you know how he’s feeling about it all?” he questioned. Danny pondered for a moment, quickly figuring out that he literally never talked to him about it. And he barely thought about it. Danny wondered if this meant he was a bad friend, because he was much too distracted with something else other than his friend. He gulped.“I don’t know…” he muttered. Roy seemed a little surprised.“Oh…” he mumbled. “Maybe you should ask him…?”“Yeah,” he cleared his throat. “I will. Eventually…” he cleared his throat. “Thanks for the concern Roy.”“I’ll always be here when you need me.”Danny smiled. Those were the words he wanted to hear. In a context like this. In a world like this.He couldn't help but to sit by his lap and wrap his arms around him tightly. Roy was caught a little off guard, but he warmed up to his affections quickly. If this wasn’t perfection for Danny, he didn’t know what was.
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
“You know Matt…” Kurtis lowered the sunglasses so they would sit by the bridge of his nose. “I like you more now.”The three of them sat in front of Roy’s house at the weirdest time of day: 3:14pm. It was an awkward time of day, but they figured that no one was home. According to Danny’s numerous gushes about Roy gathered from different times that they’d hung out, his parents both worked in the same company, and they don’t get home until pretty late. So that left Roy alone and sad blah, blah blah. Whatever Danny said after that didn’t really matter. “This should be fun,” Jason grinned. What did matter, was that Roy also wasn’t home from school yet. He had musical practice, according to Max. It was a Thursday; which meant that Max himself was in band as well. So everything fell into place, really. They probably wouldn't get caught. Maybe. Hopefully.“Wait,” Matt butted in. “What about Courtney? Do you think she’ll get home soon?”He pulled over the all too familiar mask over his face and got out a carton of eggs from the back seat. “Oh nah, she’s out with Willam tonight,” Jason explained. “Overheard them at practice.”“They’re getting pretty close, huh?” Kurtis began to nonchalantly throw some eggs at his house, lacking that excitement that they had last time. He gave a long sigh. “Is it just me, or is there something wrong about this?”“I can’t tell whether it’s because we’re missing two people, or it’s because I’m just not that mad at Roy,” Jason pondered, figuring out quickly that he had no patience for this, and so he threw the whole cartoon at the house, hoping that most of them would just crack against the wall. He was somewhat satisfied. “I actually kind of still like Roy. I mean, I hate the fact that he’s homophobic but...he’s sort of cool actually.”“Agreed,” the other two chorused.“But think about it. Danny still likes him,” Matt explained, his words sort of disattached from his actions of somewhat violent vandalism. “And Roy told him, to his face, that he would never be with him if he was gay. And called him disgusting.”“I can’t believe it,” Jason grumbled. “I can’t believe someone would say something like that all together.”“And I can’t believe that Danny would still like him,” Kurtis rolled his eyes, though the other two couldn't pick up on it through the mask. He practically threw the whole carton onto the house and watched the yolks fuze together and ooze down the white paint.Matt took a step back and saw the whole front side of the house virtually stained with an off-yellow. The carton fell from his hands.“Well shit,” he began, his voice nearly muted. “I didn’t think it would be that quick…”Jason took his side to gaze at the property in front of them. He instantly contained his gasp by closing his lips and coughing.“Well…” he started. “Roy’s not gonna be able to take this off, is he?”“Not at all,” Kurtis chimed in, his hands brushing down his jeans. “Oh well. Let’s go home.”They all shrugged and got back in the car, an odd sense of casuality in their actions. Kurtis got behind the wheel and drove off in the direction of their neighbourhood. There was a large gulp of silence until Matt pursed his lips.“I feel bad,” he confessed.“Me too,” the other two chorused. “I have this weird gut feeling that what we did was…” Jason wondered for a moment. “...wrong? Somehow.”“It’s because you did,” is what Danny would've said if he could’ve. Because in all reality, they just didn’t know any better. Not that it was anyone’s fault, really. “But think about Danny,” Kurtis reminded. “He just needs to be driven into the right direction. You know? He’s too forgiving if he’s still into Roy. Plus,” he looked towards the two of them. “It’s basically revenge for a homophobic asshole. He hates us, remember? Without even knowing us that well.”They all nodded in unison.“We should start to egg every homophobic person’s house,” Jason laughed.“Yeah, but we couldn't get away with it,” Matt reasoned. “Even though that’s a good idea.”They all laughed to shrug off that feeling of guilt off of their shoulders. The only problem? Roy came back a moment too late, and his bag fell from his back.
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
“Well…” Max lowered himself on the sofa. “You don’t seem to have a fever.”Danny’s a very socially awkward person. Everyone knew that. So of course he failed to actually ask Max to talk.
“Hey Max,”
“Danny?”
Danny decided to stand outside of the school, his hands in his jacket and his gaze a little lowered compared to the usual bright smile he put on when he was with Max.
This seemed like the only way to properly approach him. In his mind.
“What are you doing here?” the older boy stammered, his oboe case feeling loose within his fingers.
“I-I…” his voice trailed off, his heart beating in his ear. He gulped. And gulped again. And breathed out. “I’m sick.”
He blurted out a lie without even wanting to. He couldn't help it. And it made him feel even worse when Max’s brows crinkled from pity and he came to his side to take him home.
They caught a public bus home, Max quickly explaining that his parents didn’t like to drive, but he brushed that off quickly. He wanted to just see if Danny was okay, reading his face as sickly instead of the reality, which was nervousness. He was pale and discolored, but because of fear, not illness. But only Danny knew that.
“I feel kind of light headed actually…” he continued to lie. He didn’t know why he went along with it. Max comfortably spread out a blanket on top of his body, tucking him in nicely.
He brought a spoon to his lips, with vegetable soup of course, and gave him a evenly portioned mouthful. Danny graciously took it.
“It’ll be okay Danny,” he frowned. “Well, for lightheadedness, vitamin B-6 and E work the best. Oh and iron of course. So if you don’t mind having red meat for dinner and a side of-”
“Max,” he cut him off. “I-I don’t need to stay and have you cook for me,” he sat up slightly. “I feel bad if you do that.”
The silver haired boy gave a hum and sat by his side. His thumbs fumbled in his lap for a moment until he gave a long sigh.
“I think I finally figured out why you wanted to come,” he said, his voice low. “You wanted to talk to me about…”
His hands awkwardly gestured for a moment.
“Roy?” he mumbled. “Yeah...I did, I’m sorry.”
“No it’s okay,” he shook his head.
“I didn’t feel comfortable just bringing it up so-”
“It’s fine Danny,” he grinned over reluctantly. “I get it,” he glanced back down. “...so what did you want to say?”
“Umm…” he coughed. “I guess I wanted to know how you were feeling with everything…? That sounded weird. I don’t know...I’m sorry. In a way. To do that in front of you and it obviously made you uncomfortable so...”
“It’s okay…” he bit down on his lip.
“It’s obviously not fine. I know you Max. I know you’re not okay with what happened and I want to make sure you’re okay. Because if you’re not I don’t feel okay, and I can’t go on with life,” he shuffled over to him. “Please tell me what’s wrong. And what I did wrong.”
“This,” his eyes narrowed on the younger boy. “This is all wrong. Everything you do is so wrong.”
“What do you-?”
“You give me so many mixed signals!” he shouted. Danny sat back. “Every single day. You act like we’re so much more than we are. A-And in reality, we're...we're nothing.”
“W-We’re not nothing though Max,”
“You’re just like Matt!” Danny zipped his lips and gulped. “You act like I’m this important person to you but you would easily cast me aside for some other guy.”
The younger boy’s brows crinkled as he bit down on his lip. He tried to shuffle even closer to him but Max held back.
“I didn’t know…” his voice muted itself.
“I didn’t think you’d be the same Danny,” he shook his head. “I thought you understood, and sympathised and cared but-”
“I do still care about you Max. I-I don’t get it,” he leaned over to him. “We’ve always been friends. Great friends. I still consider you an amazing friend but what changed now?”
“Roy. That’s what’s changed,”
“So now that Roy’s in the picture we can’t be friends?”
“You’re such an idiot Danny,” he spat, so much harsher than he wanted. Hurt and hatred intertwined with his words, making Danny part his lips into a frown. “You are so stupid. It’s because I like you! Isn't that obvious?” tears built up beneath his eyes. “And you obviously don’t like me back at all. And no one ever will apparently because I never win.”
“Come on Max,” Danny fought. “That’s not true.”
“I feel like I will never be happy. When the heck has something gone for me?!”
“We talked about this on our trip! Remember? On that rooftop at night that was-”
“Way too romantic to be platonic? Yes, I do remember that,” he sniffed, and collected the tears with his index finger. “Way too clearly in fact because I probably remembered it differently to you.”
“Max!” his bold words pierced through the building mist. The tallest boy’s voice hitched as he froze for a second. Danny finally caught his breath as his hands slowly released from being a fist. “Let me talk for a second. And don’t talk back,” he said firmly. Max seemed to subtly nod at that, his face still stunned. “Max, I like you as a friend. And I’m really sorry that I lead you on. I wasn’t aware of it and I didn’t mean to hurt you in any way. Because I care about you. And there’s not gonna be a day when I wouldn’t care about you. But…” he sighed deeply. Danny knew exactly what old Danny would’ve done. He would’ve done something really stupid and went with it, feeling sorry for Max. Understanding what he was feeling. To feel rejected and unloved. But he had morals. And that wasn’t going to change. Even for someone he cared deeply about. It was complex but...he knew what was right. And he was confident in himself to act on it. “...I can’t be with you. I’m really sorry. And I don’t know what the future holds so I can’t exactly guarantee anything but…”
“I know, I got it,” he was practically crying by this point.
“But you don’t get it. Because I’m still going,” he argued. “Because this might not be romantic. This might not be going exactly to plan, and I’m really sorry that it isn’t, but I still love you. I still care about you, I’m still going to be here whenever you need me, and listen to your problems, and help you out. Because that’s what friends do too. We might not get married, but that doesn't mean I’m not going to be there to watch you get married and cheer the absolute loudest in the crowd. Or be there to watch your musical performances and be there when you graduate. It’s not going to be romantic, I’m sorry. But that doesn't mean we’re not going to be friends, and I’m not going to try my hardest to make you happy Max. I’m sorry, that my actions got interpreted differently, but I want you to know that I still care. And it doesn't matter if we’re together, or I’m with Roy, and you’re with someone else, or whatever. None of that matters. Okay? I’m truly sorry that I don’t feel the same way in that sense, but that doesn't mean I care about you any less.”
Max sat there for a moment, his body cemented into a polite position. And his face just frozen with shock. Danny was puffing, his voice thinned with exhaust and his chest filled with light breaths.
“...Danny I’m…” Max’s eyes crinkled shut as he lunged over to him, his arms wrapped around his waist. He wailed into his shoulder, feeling his feelings crack under the weight of his own body. His face curled into a red until he couldn't breathe properly anymore, and his fingers scrunched the fabric of his shirt until it got drenched in tears. But Danny didn’t care about those details. He just rested his hands on his back and let him cry onto him for support. He soothingly ran his fingers up and down his spine, until Max parted slightly.
“Sorry…” he cried, his eyes bloodshot. Danny pursed his lips.
“It’s okay. I’ll always be here to help,” he reassured with a bright grin. “Tell me anything and everything.”
“C-Can I be honest?” he hiccuped, his hands calming down a little. “...I don’t really think that I’ll find someone...I don’t know.”
“I get it,” he nodded. “I think everyone goes through that. Trust me. But know this,” he placed his hands onto his shoulders. “You’re going to graduate soon. Soon enough, you can do whatever you want, okay? Do whatever makes you happy. There’s nothing else holding you back at that point. And why wouldn’t you, right? You deserve it.”
“...thanks Danny,” he grinned. “I needed to hear that…”
“No worries,” he exchanged a quick hug.
“One more thing…” he started, his voice low.
“Yeah, what’s up?”
“...do you think Kurtis and I would be a thing?”
“Max!” he unintentionally exclaimed. “I-I don’t know…? Why? Do you like him?”
“What? No. I just figured because everyone’s finding someone,” he shrugged it somewhat too casually. “And we’re the leftovers I guess.”
“I mean, you might find someone outside of school. Right?”
“I don’t know, it seemed like the most plausible theory I guess,”
Danny chuckled.
“You’re funny Max,”
“Am I?”
“Most definitely.”
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
“So...Danny…”
Danny felt bad.
Max had mentioned that his parents didn't like driving, but they basically forced him to take their offer when he was going to go home. Danny somewhat wished that he left earlier than he did, because he really didn't want to meet Max’s parents. The way he described them was so...uptight. Negative. And that didn’t seem like something that Max would say about someone unless it was true. He was an incredibly kind person, so he figured that his parents must have been pretty bad.
And well, they sort of were.
They were just how he imagined. His mom, well Max called her “mother” which he wasn’t used to at all, was out shopping for groceries when they were home, so she came home just as Danny got up. And she seemed fairly pleasant. A little soft spoken, but she seemed like someone who enforced strict rules. Danny just got a glimpse of his dad, or his “father”, when he was just about to leave. He was dressed in a crisp suit, looking like it got ironed almost every day. And his hair was gelled to cement and he looked like he had never smiled in his life. He seemed like what you expect, I suppose. A businessman. A proper father. Someone who might not like Max all too much.
And now he was in the car with them, the air much too thick and quiet.
“What year are you in again?” Max’s mother asked, her eyes never meeting his.
“I-I’m a year below Max,” he answered, his voice quivering a little more than he would’ve liked. She was a little intimidating, he thought.
“Oh, so you’re younger,” she said, her voice somewhat leading into a sarcastic tone. “Well...you dress...like that. Yes, I see that.”
“Mother? What do you mean?” Max asked, his mom snapping over to him like he was speaking out of line.
“All that...black,” her eyes bounced off of his old dark jacket, to his ripped jeans, to his dusty shoes. Yeah, he wasn’t dressed nicely. At all. He looked homeless compared to them.
It’s something Danny looked past after a while. He began to look past Max’s nicely ironed shirts, and neutral toned sweaters after a while, and soon he just forgot about what he wore too. It just didn't matter all too much. Danny thought that Max was more than that.
“It was laundry day,” Danny butted in a lie. “...so these aren’t clothes I’d…” he pondered for the right wording. “...prefer to wear…?”
“Oh,” his mother piped. “Understood. Everyone has bad days.”
“Of course,” he chuckled uncomfortably.
“And how was school today?” typical line, Danny told himself.
“Good,” Max answered typically too.
“It must be better than good. More description Max. Like great, exceptional, wonderful-”
“Mediocre. School was mediocre,” his tone was a little firmer. “Maths was incredibly repetitive. English hasn’t progressed any further. And physics continues to be a complete drag.”
“In what sense?”
“It is repetition from work I have already completed, thus I find it boring,” his tone remained firm, even a little edged. His mother didn’t meet his eye.
“What about you Danny? Do you enjoy school?” damn it, he muttered under his breath, gulping.
“It’s…” he pondered for the right word. “Wonderful.”
Probably the wrong word.
“What is your favourite subject?”
“Music,” he blurted out honestly.
“Wow,” she nodded to herself stiffly. “What instrument do you play?”
“Guitar…”
“Oh,” he cleared her throat. “Wow…”
Danny knew that he said all the wrong things when she stopped talking all together. He wondered why he didn’t say a lie. She was never going to see him again, so he could’ve gotten away with lying about everything, but he didn’t. He cursed at himself for it.
“Thank you so much Mrs Malanaphy,” he tried to sound as cheerful as possible when he hopped out of the car, his bag swung over his shoulder. She didn't reply. Great.
He began to make his way over to his own house until he heard a bursting splash against, what sounded like, wood. And then a loud flowing sound, like it was harshly running down the house. Glancing over, he saw Roy washing his house with a strong hose, his brows crinkles and sweat beating his forehead.
Danny instantly dashed over, dropping his bag by the doorstep of his house.
“What are you doing?” he asked, his tone forcefully happy. Roy grumbled to himself.
“Someone egged the house,”
Danny’s heart cracked a few inches. Because he knew exactly who did it. His eyes narrowed.
“I’ll help,” he plasteed on a smile and fetched his own hose from his house to help him hose down the off-yellow colour that seemed to dry itself onto the paint.
“Thanks Danny,” he grinned over, looking incredibly thankful at his action. “I have no idea who would do this.”
“M-Me either,” he stammered, nervous chuckles ending his sentence.
“It’s such a trek to get off and…” he rubbed his temples. “Who the fuck would do this? Seriously? Who the fuck would do this?”
“I-I don’t know…”
“Have I done something fucking wrong? Because I don’t think I deserved any of this,” he shook his head aggressively.
“We’ll get this cleaned up Roy. It’ll be okay,” he tried to calm him down. “Trust me. I can get some soap from upstairs. My mom can help if you want-”
“It’s just,” he stopped the flow of the water and slammed it onto the ground angrily, groaning to himself as he sat onto the ground. Danny instantly rushed to his side. “I can’t fucking believe it. This is the last thing I need right now. All my tests are lining up, the musical is fucking going to shit, and then this happens? Are you fucking kidding me?”
“Roy it’s gonna be-”
“Oh stop it Danny,” he snapped. “I don’t need this happy bullshit right now.”
Danny stayed silent.
He crossed his legs and clasped his hands into his lap like some kindergartner. A child who was too scared and upset to fight back. So he just sat back and watched Roy reach towards the hose to turn it on.
“I don’t even know what I should be doing any-”
Pause.
Danny peered down to see his shirt completely drenched. Roy had accidentally blasted him with the hose, his shirt now dripping with water. He scoffed.
“Oh my god Danny I’m so-”
He bursted out into laughter. Unintentionally, really. He grabbed onto his shirt and laughed at the wet mess.
And Roy did too. He ditched the hose and leaned over to him, cackling at the top of his lungs as he saw the water seep through the fabric of his clothes.
Danny instantly went towards it, blasting it towards Roy. He went tumbling back, laughing as he fought back and tackled him to the ground. They were a mess. With limbs tangled and loud laughter. Danny felt at home.
“You’re an idiot,” he screamed, trying to aim the water at Roy’s face. The older boy squealed and pushed back.
“You’re an idiot!” he argued childishly, ultimately turning it off so he could actually breathe. He panted for a moment before he looked up at him. “I’m sorry...for earlier.”
Danny wiped a sweat from his face.
“It’s no problem,” he shrugged. “Don't do it again though.”
“Won’t. Promise.”
And they exchanged gracious smiles before going back to Roy’s for a few hours. Filled with remenisense and familiarity.
Unknown to them, Courtney was looking outside her window at the time, gently smiling over to the scene play out in her bedroom. She felt a flutter by her chest. Gladness, she called it. But it was also a mix of nostalgia and happiness for Danny. Like a ‘thank god’ moment for him.
“What are you looking at?” Willam peered over her shoulder to see the two entering the house again, standing a little closer than what’s probably normal. “Roy and Danny?”
“Yeah,” she sat back. “They’ve been friends for ages.”
She hummed with amusement. Much like Courtney who was internally shrieking for Danny’s success.
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
“Guess what?” Jason sat down angrily at their usual spot for lunch, but his expression was unusually frustrated. “What?” Matt asked, his tone a tad concerned.“I overheard Willam and Courtney talking,” he grumbled. “And they said that Roy and Danny are, like, best friends now. Like they’re doing great and Danny actually helped him clean up his house after our mess.”“Wait, wait, what mess?” Max questioned, his brows crinkled. The other three simultaneously gulped. He gave a long, frustrated sigh. “Don’t tell me that you-”“Egged someone’s house again?” Kurtis ended the sentence with guilt. “I mean…”“Are you kidding me?!” he shrieked. “Why would you do that?!”“It was to protect Danny,” Matt tried to reason. “We heard from Danny that Roy is a homophobic asshole, so we were trying to…?”“Give him a piece of our mind,” Jason finished for him. “And you’re going to do something illegal to do this?” he rubbed his temples. “I get what you’re going for but this is just plain stupid! Also if Danny finds out, he’ll be incredibly mad. You know that right?”“It’s for the greater good. Think about it like this Max: we’re trying to help Danny by punishing Roy. He’s an asshole, and he doesn't deserve someone like that,” Kurtis said confidently. Max groaned at the answer.“Wait,” Jason paused. “Where is Danny anyway?”“Oh. He’s on some school excursion today. His whole grade is,” Kurtis explained. “That one to the garbage dump?”“That one to the garbage dump,”“Oh gross I hated that one,” Max shook his head. “That’s besides the point. Don't you think it’s inappropriate to talk about him while he’s gone?”“What? We bitch about people all the time,” Jason rolled his eyes. “And it’s not like we’re saying something bad about Danny. Just about Roy.”Max gave a deep sigh, filling up his lungs and completely sucking them out. “But have you ever stopped to consider why he likes Roy?” he tried to reason, his voice already half way through being pissed off.“Oh? The homophobic asshole?”“No, I mean the childhood friend who cares and loves Danny, and has looked after him and looked out for him way longer than we’ve known his existence,” he dragged out. “Look, I love Danny as much as all of you guys and I get what you’re trying to do, but we need to remember that he’s not a stupid kid. He’s Danny,” he paused to think about it. “Okay, he’s a little bit stupid sometimes, but overall, he’s a bright kid. And I believe in him to make good decisions.”“I mean…” Kurtis started. “Okay...yeah. I get where you’re coming from.”“If Roy is completely bad news, Danny wouldn’t be with him,” he choked on his own words. “I-I mean like friends wise. You know.”Matt nodded in agreement. “I agree with Max,” he smiled. “Maybe we shouldn't manage things for him. I sometimes forget that he’s only a few months younger than us.”“Yeah, I guess we did get a little carried away…” Kurtis scratched the back of his neck. “But he does come across as the baby of the group. Like, he’s the baby spice of this group.”“That’s true,” Jason acknowledged. “But still, if Roy does something shitty, I will flip out.”“I mean if Roy does end up hurting Danny we could always egg his house again,” Max grinned, the others cheering enthusiastically.“There you go. Max has officially joined the dark side,” Jason cackled. “Plot twist, maybe he’s the most evil out of all of us. I mean, he did break a window,” the brunette laughed.“Oh shut up! Don’t even bring that up,” the tallest boy slapped himself in the face. “That was the most stupid thing I have ever done.”“Tell me about it. How did we get away with it again?” the cheerleader laughed. “Because of my amazing driving skills, of course,” Kurtis cocked a shoulder, making Matt groan.“Don’t get ahead of yourself,”“Oh shut up. We wouldn’t be here today if it wasn’t for me,”“Yeah, we’d probably be better off,” he joked, the others snorting. Kurtis narrowed his eyes, but quickly chuckled.“I hate you,”“I hate you too.”
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
“Look, I’m not saying she’s a bitch but,” Willam started, getting her stuff out of her locker. “She’s a bitch. We all know it.”“I like her actually,” Courtney smiled. “She’s funny and nice and she’s done my hair at competitions before.”“But that’s because you like everyone Court,” Alaska chuckled. “And Will, she is actually pretty nice. Have you ever had a conversation with her?”“I don't need to have a conversation with Alyssa fucking Edwards to figure out that she’s sort of a delusional bitch,” she argued, her voice still relatively soft.They do this every morning. They collect their books together by their lockers which are conveniently next to each other and they do their daily strut around the school, to show off how amazing they are. But Courtney was so thankful that the “main part” was cut out now, now that her and Dan weren’t together anymore. It meant that she could hang out with her two friends and not be intruded by some asshole. Two friends that she actually wanted to be around. And it was great.“She is a great asset to our squad too. Don’t forget,” Courtney pointed out, tightening her ponytail. “That’s true,” Willam acknowledged reluctantly. “As long as she's not talking, I’m fine with her.”“Oh come on guys, she’s not even that bad,” as the tallest girl tried to reason with her, someone suddenly stopped them on their path.
“Wow, it’s been awhile since I’ve seen you.”
Courtney hated sarcasm from particular people. It rubbed her the wrong way. And as she peered up to see Dan’s face, she felt her blood boil.“Hey Courtney,” he slurred cockily. She gritted her teeth. “Long time no see.”“Jesus Christ, what do you want Dan?” Willam stepped in front of her. “I just wanted to ask questions, that’s all,” he shrugged.“We all know that you’re trying to start shit right now, and I don't think you'll want to,” her voice was firm and comforting for Courtney.“Oh wow I’m intimidated,” he laughed sarcastically. “Anyways, I’m just here to ask Courtney: why? Why did you cheat on me?”The whole world around them seemed to freeze at his line. Everyone in the hallway looked over to them, their conversations dying down to mutters of gossip, and all their attentions shifting over to them. Courtney felt her whole body shiver at their narrowed eyes.“I-I didn’t cheat on you,” she tried to stand her ground. “I’ve said that before and you didn’t even bother to listen to me.”“Because Roy told me otherwise,” the head cheerleader scoffed, on the verge of tears. Willam leaned over a little for protection's sake. “Roy?” she stuttered. “Why would Roy tell you something like that?”“You’re the one who hooked up with him!” the gasps in the room overshadowed her own sense of misery at that moment. She felt her whole heart just drop, with complete confusion and realisation. It was conflicting but...well, it was something alright. “I-I wouldn't do such a thing,” she argued, her bottom lip quivering from shame, anger and embarrassment. “Are you telling me that he’s lying?” Dan raised an eyebrow, his stance looking so much bigger than it did before for Courtney. “Because I don't think he’ll do something like that. Why would he do something like that?”“I-I don’t know,” she stammered, her voice shrinking in her own throat. Stop asking me so many things. “Don't ask me.”“So…” he stepped closer, but she unintentionally stepped back, the pressure from him making her uncomfortable. “...you didn’t actually?”“N-No, I wouldn't…” she shook her head, mostly because the thoughts were starting to become overwhelming for her and she didn’t want to think about anything at this point. “I’m not that type of person.”“Well...I’m sorry Court,” when the nickname came back to his lips, it made Courtney’s world spiral. Like everything was getting sucked into what it used to be. Rewinding. She felt her knees on the verge of giving out. “I didn't mean to accuse you of anything,” he slapped himself on the forehead. “I hope I didn’t come across as an asshole.”“Well you did,” Willam intruded, entering their little bubble with a harsh foot in. “And you're not gonna come back from this, you know that right? You fucking screamed at her in front of the whole goddamn school!”“Because I thought she fucking cheated on me with some theatre kid,” he growled back, his voice just as intense as hers. He looked past her to try and meet Courtney’s gaze. “Come on Court. You know me. I didn't mean it.”She felt her chest collapse onto itself. Willam brought an arm to her shoulder, reeling her in closely. It was like a reminder, for a moment, of what they had. Of all the things they had for a few months now. “Well if it’s such a big deal,” Alaska broke through the barriers too. “Why didn't you ask her months ago? It’s been so long.”“Because I’ve been thinking about it nonstop, and I needed to get closure,” he was practically begging now. Guilt tasted sour in Courtney’s mouth. “I still love you to this day,” the aww’s in the background made the blonde close her eyes from fright. “And I just want to say that I want you back.”
Fuck no. Don't say that.
“Look Dan,” Alaska started off for her, deciphering quickly that Courtney’s lips were zipped shut. “She doesn't want to-”
“I want Courtney to answer it herself,” Dan dismissed her entirely, making the tallest girl gulp. Willam crinkled her brows.
“Dude, are you joking? Don't put her on the spot like that. You're being an even bigger asshole than-”
“Dan,” Courtney blurted out the name louder than she wanted it to, like her words tumbled out awkwardly.
“Yeah?”
“I…”
She looked at both her friends for a moment before she opened her lips again.
“Let me have time to think about it.”
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
“Are you kidding me Court?”
“What are you talking about?”
“You know exactly what I’m talking about,”
The tension between all three of them was so much thicker than what they were used to. It was mostly quiet, and each pause was so much longer than their usual conversations. It was Courtney’s room, the place they usually stayed on Friday afternoons, and they were all sitting miles apart from each other. Alaska was positioned by a seat in the far corner, and Willam was by the verandah, leaning up against the shut doors. The head cheerleader was tucked away by the end of her bed, her legs crossed and her spirits down.
“I don’t want to talk about it…” the blonde sighed. Willam narrowed her eyes.
“You’re not getting back together with him,” she demanded it like a stuck up child. The tallest girl crossed her arms.
“You can't say that Will,” she argued harshly yet maturely. “It’s her choice,” she turned her attention to the other girl. “But if you do get back together with him, I’ll think you're a dumb blonde.”
“I know,” she pursed her lips, even though she was joking. “It’s just…”
“It’s some stupid reason, I bet,” Willam fought, rolling her eyes. They instantly locked eyes at that, and the older girl felt her own heart shatter.
“Are you kidding me?” she snapped, her voice weak. “Don’t say that shit to me Will. Don’t even get me started.”
“Why? Because I’m telling the truth?”
“No!” she threw a pillow at her angrily, leaving the other girl to dodge it hastily. “Because you always disregard me like some idiot! And I’m not that stupid, you know? I’m sick and tired of you casting me aside because I deserve more respect than that. Okay?”
Willam blinked, speechless, and Alaska was silently rooting for her. She grinned over to her, before she began to speak.
“She’s right Will,” she acknowledged. “She can make her own decision. And we’re gonna support her.”
“No,” she snorted sarcastically, making the other two crinkle their brows in shock. “I know what’s right-”
“Your opinion isn't worth more than hers,” the tallest blonde argued. “Stop it Will.”
“But this is obviously so wrong!” she shouted, a snicker of disbelief on her tongue. “He’s a dickhead Court. He didn't believe you, told you that you were lying and you didn't hear back from him until a whole month later! Can I also mention the fact that he didn’t bother to ask you about it and believed a story from a theatre kid dickhead? Over you? And how long were you two together for?”
“2 years…”
“Wow, it must’ve been a useless build up of trust in those 2 years because he did jackshit. In the relationship too,”
“Okay, that’s enough Will,”
“I’m not done,” she stormed over to her on the bed and sat directly in front of her. Alaska rushed over to hold them apart. “Look at me Court,” she raised her gaze with a light touch by chin. “You deserve better than Dan. He forgot to get you a corsage for the annual ball for godsake. And when has he ever asked about how you felt? Or what you want to do? Or how you’re going? Tell me.”
“Well, when have you?” her voice slurred with distaste. Alaska nearly gasped at the comment. Willam’s face lightened from realisation. “The only person who ever does is Danny and Alaska. Even Roy does it more than you and Dan,” she shook her head and glanced away. “Why do I always end up with people who don't care about me as much as I care about myself?”
“I-I do care about you,” Willam reached out her hands to place them onto her shoulders lightly. She felt her collapse slightly in her grasp. “I’m sorry, oh my god, I didn't think…”
“I know you didn't think about it. Are you even used to thinking about someone other than yourself?” tears built up beneath her eyes. Alaska’s lips parted. “I didn't think so…”
“I’m learning,” she interrupted. “I’m learning. I’m sorry I guess I never...had to. B-But I do now…so...I hope you accept my apology…?” Courtney didn’t reply for a few breaths of silence, and it made Willam gulp. “I’m a bitch. I know. Everyone points it out every day and they act like I don't know. I have to put up with me everyday, so I know. Trust me. But if it hurts you, I can learn. I'll change. I promise.”
Courtney sighed.
“Don't change too much…” she mumbled. Willam widened her eyes. “...because I still like you.”
Willam smiled brightly, bringing her into a tight hug. She felt Courtney laugh into her shoulder comfortably, a tear rolling down her cheek.
“You guys fight like a couple,” Alaska joked, the other two flinging apart from awkwardness. They both swallowed hard. “...guys I’m joking. Geez you guys are acting like…” she paused, and screamed. “Wait! You two aren't-”
“What the fuck ‘Laska?! No!” Willam stepped in with a shaky breath. “How the hell did you get to that conclusion?”
“What? I don't know,” she shrugged. “Is it that far fetched?”
“Y-Yes,” she cleared her throat. “You don't think we’re straight?”
“Truth be told, not really,” she lightheartedly chuckled. “Are you two homophobic?”
“No,” the two chorused, accidentally talking at the same time. The three sat there for a moment.
“Then what's the problem with calling it out as a joke?” she questioned obliviously. Willam groaned and looked over to Courtney who gave an indecipherable expression. “What? Oh my god, you guys always do this thing where you look at each other and I have no idea what’s going on.”
Willam have a heavy sigh, which made Alaska look over to her with a slightly lopsided grin.
“Look Alaska…” she began, her eyes still on Courtney. The other girl just gave a small shrug, but an encouraging expression. “There’s something...we need to tell you.”
“Umm okay,” she positioned herself into a more comfortable position. “Tell me,” the couple exchanged a set of looks that made her pace back and forth slightly. “Is it that important?”
“If we tell you...you can’t tell anyone, okay?” Courtney’s hands clasped over Willam’s and they both looked over at the final girl with pleading eyes.
“Yeah, of course,”
“Do you want to say it?” Willam asked over to Courtney, nudging her slightly. She gulped.
“Alaska…” she started.
“...Courtney…?” she kind of chuckled at the intensity to wear it off a little. “Come on. What is it?”
“I’m...actually dating someone,” she admitted, trying to keep it vague. Alaska widened her eyes.
“W-Wait what? So you were cheating on-?”
“No, no,” she hastily butted in. “I started dating…them, after. And I’m really happy now.”
“So why would you say that you were going to “think about it” with Dan?” she blinked.
“I-I don’t know…” she shrugged stiffly. “I guess I didn’t want to be rude…”
“But you could’ve just told him, right? That you’re in a relationship and all?”
“Right. See. There’s the thing...I…”
“Okay this is too tedious. Spit it out Court,” Willam snapped, somewhat frustrated but still somewhat sweet.
“...you do it. I-I can’t-”
“We’re dating.”
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
“E-Excuse me?” Alaska stared at them for a moment, and let out a few chuckles like she was just trying to decipher the situation. And that feeling of awkwardness wasn’t helping at all. Why did it have to be so quiet? “L-Like you and…?” she pointed over to Willam with slightly shaky hands. “...what? Sorry I’m kind of confused but…”“I-It’s a relationship,” Courtney heard Willam’s voice tremble for the first time. From fear. From upset. And she felt herself move towards her for comfort.Alaska chuckled into her hand. Courtney felt her own chest clench. She looked like she was oddly denying it in her head, like she was avoiding it in a way. And then she crinkled her eyes shut and let out a sigh. “I...I can’t believe it,” she bit down on her lip. “...fuck you.”“Wait what-”“I fucking lost a bet with Sharon,”There was a moment of silence, filled with an overwhelming sense of confusion and surprise, until Willam knocked through it.“What the fuck?” she blurted out, her voice cracked with shock.“What?” Alaska gazed at both of them with complete oblivion. “You told me that you liked her like 3 years ago.”“You have?” the blonde piped out with slight contained excitement, looking at her with wide eyes. Willam gulped.“You’re being the worst friend right now,” she groaned into her hand. “I guess I’m just sort of surprised that Courtney said yes,” her eyes darted over to her. “Will? Really? You could do better than that Courtney.”“Alaska!” she jokingly shrieked, leaving her to laugh loudly. “What? I’m obviously joking,” she slapped her on the shoulder. “No, no, I’m happy for you two. Obviously. Fucking hell, we’ve been friends for, how long now? A long time. And I just want you guys to be happy. I’ll support you.”“Aww ‘Lasky,” Courtney wrapped her arms around her tightly and brought her into a messy hug, giggling into her neck as she toppled to her side. Willam pinched her nose. “You built up all that tension for nothing,” she grumbled. “You scared me shitless.”“I’m sorry. Maybe it’s a thing that I picked up from Sharon,” she playfully shrugged, looking up a Wilam with a wide grin. “Oh Jesus, don’t tell me that you’re actually dating her,” Willam slurred, receiving a joking smile. “Oh fuck off.”“You’ve known it for a while though!” Alaska pouted.“Okay, I’ve guessed it. Doesn't mean I actually knew it,” she snickered. “So…?”“It’s a yes! Of course it’s a yes,” she laughed. “We’ve been together for, like, months now,” the other two girls giggled excitedly. They had a weird vibe going on. It was nice. Unfamiliar. But none of them were opposed to it. “What was I supposed to do, huh? I’ve always been the third wheel.”Courtney gasped.“Oh my god, you don’t really think that, do you?” Alaska didn’t fully meet her eye. “Aw, ‘Lasky.”“No, I’ve always understood why,” she brushed off.“But it’s still not right. Alaska, we love you,” she smiled over. “That’s not going to change just because we’re together now, you know? It’s like a threesome but…”“It’s not a threesome Court,” Willam laughed over. “We’re just together and Alaska’s with some punk rock dyke.”“We’re all dykes you idiot,” the words rolled off her tongue with a colloquial yet fun tone. “Yeah, but only one of us are edgy,” Willam teased her. “Oh come on, we’re all a little fake, right?” she tried to justify, raising her eyebrows. “Can't we all just be happy?” Courtney wheezed out through her grin. “This is like the happiest moment of my life so far.”“Yeah, yeah it’s pretty great,” her girlfriend brought her arm around her shoulder, reeling her in tightly and comfortably. “Does anyone else find it weird that we’re all closeted lesbians?”“They do say that similar people are brought together. You know, people with similar interests,” Alaska smiled over, admiring the sight. “You mean boobs?” they all laughed. “Yeah I guess,” she shrugged. “But I’m happy too.”And they exchanged smiles. Perfectly slotted together smiles, and Courtney finally felt like she loved herself.
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
“Thanks for joining me,”Danny could imagine himself at a desk in a darkly lit room. He was kind of a villain, in his head, dressed in a tux with his hair gelled back. And he would clasp his hands on top of the desk and eye all his victims harshly. Well, in his dream he was that cool. In reality he was at a pizza restaurant with his friends.He missed the last day of school because of some stupid excursion that was just utterly shit. Seriously. Most of it was literal shit. Danny hated it. It also made him realise how much he hated his grade. Like, before he at least had Jay and Gia, but now they completely ignored him. And he didn’t have many other friends in his own class. He kind of stuck with Tatianna and said nothing so she wouldn’t leave him too.“No worries Danny,” Max smiled. “Plus, this was a perfect way to finally use up the coupons I got from Brian F.”“Okay on more important issues,” Jason started. “Pineapple on pizza. Yes or not?” it was pretty typical for him to start some sort of debate for them.Danny mentally slapped Jason. He was here to start some rant he had building up inside of him about what happened with Roy but of course they start talking about something else entirely. “No,” Danny and Kurtis chorused, their eyes falling on the other boys when they stayed silent. “Really?”“I don’t really care,” Max shrugged. “I just feel a little bad if I don’t eat them though.”“I like Hawaiian,” Matt grinned. “This place is just great, to be honest. Anything they have here is like crack to me.”Danny couldn't help but to gulp at the slight irony. That was inappropriate.
But he shook his head, figuring out that this was the best time to just insert something in there.
“The first time I came here was with Roy,” he saw Kurtis nearly choke on his own drink, and Jason spit his out. Matt stopped himself from coughing. “He really likes pizza actually. One of his favourite foods.”
“A lot of people like pizza though, right?” Max tried to reason, staring over at the others with an awkward expression.
“But he’s such a picky eater actually,” he slurred jokingly. “He especially hates eggs.”
Max just pinched his nose, giving up straight away. The youngest boy leaned forward from his own entertainment, watching the other three boys just crumble under the pressure.
“...damn how did he find out?” Matt sipped on his glass of water quietly.
“I'm his next door neighbour stupid,” he groaned, rubbing temples. “What the fuck were you guys thinking?”
“Can I just quickly say that it was for a greater good?” Jason added, defending them poorly.
“How the fuck was it a good idea?” he snapped.
“It was because you still liked him even though he was a dickhead to you,” Kurtis said, somewhat harshly, somewhat defensively. Almost too casually. “It was like pay back, you know?”
“You guys are idiots,” he groaned into his hand.
“Can I mention that I didn’t take part in this?” Max piped in, his eyes pacing back and forth between the boys.
“Okay, everyone but Max is an idiot,” Danny pointed out, the tallest boy letting out a sigh of relief.
“It was Matt’s idea!” Kurtis stammered out, receiving death stares from the former footballer.
“Wow geez thanks for throwing me under the bus…” he murmured, stuffing his face with another pizza.
“But everyone fucking did it,” Danny crinkled his brows.“Jesus guys. Roy doesn't deserve that.”
“But he’s homophobic! Come on,” Jason whined.
“We wouldn't get anywhere in life if we just egged every homophobic person’s house,” the youngest boy, for once in his life, sounded like the most mature and logical one in the group. “Maybe this shows that we shouldn't pick fights and we should only go after people when they go for us first.”
“Exactly! Roy came for you!” Jason argued. “He was an asshole and we were here to like…” he looked towards Matt who gave him a shrug. “I don’t know, do justice.”
Danny rubbed his temples
“Okay...I get where you’re coming from…” he exhaled. “...and I’m thankful for trying to look out for me...but…” he rolled his eyes. “Okay there’s something that I need to say about Roy...”
“Oh my god, I knew he was gay,” he uttered accidentally, clearing his throat straight away.
“W-What...no…?” Danny lied lamely. It was that instinct of lying coming back up again. He didn't know whether it was a lame excuse or a habit that still lasted, but he couldn't help it. And plus, they promised to keep it a secret. And that meant that this had to be a secret from his closest friends too.
Oh and also Jason and Kurtis are blabber mouths. That too.
“I was just gonna say that he apologised,” he smiled it off lopsidedly, but it was just convincing enough for all the other boys to nod along with it. Max eyed him oddly.
Max and him were in a weird situation. Well, at least it wasn’t exactly as weird as it once was. But Danny sort of hinted at the whole Roy thing with Max, even though there were no actual verbal confirmations for this. And Max didn’t fully know, right? Danny didn’t want to ask. And Max didn’t want to either.
“Properly, properly? Or like weakly?” Jason examined him.
“Was he a dickhead about it?” Matt added.
“Does he know that you're gay?” Kurtis finally asked.
“Uh…” Danny pondered. “Properly, no, probably.”
“Okay,” they chorused.
There was just enough of a pause for Danny to breathe.
“And…” Matt broke it. “We’re sorry. About what happened. Max actually finally made us realise that what we were doing was...wrong.”
Danny gazed over to the boy on the other side of the table, and he replied with a minimal grin and a flush of the cheeks. He felt a little flutter by his chest.
“Thanks Max,” he brightly said. Max just replied with a small nod and a press of the lips to conceal his growing blush.
“Okay, back to less serious matters,” Jason slowly shifted the conversation into warmer territories.
“If you’re going to ask whether diet coke is that bad, the answer is yes,” Matt laughed over, his boyfriend pouting.
“But I don’t see the difference,” he pouted.
“Diet coke is disgusting,” Kurtis rolled his eyes, joining in on the banter.
“All coke is bad for you. Maybe we should lay off them for a little while,” motherly guidance, Danny thought.
“Or,” Danny began. “We won’t because we’re only teenagers once and so we have an excuse to completely ruin our bodies for 2 years,” he grinned cheesily. “Well, one for you guys.”
“Oh no, I’m not graduating. I’m repeating,” Jason joked. “I’m virtually failing all my classes anyway.”
“That's not true Jason,” Matt smiled over. “But I’m not dismissing the idea of repeating.”
“Come on guys, you guys aren't that bad at school. Plus, adulthood means we can do whatever we want,” Kurtis confidently arched his back. “You guys can run away and get hitched or whatever, Max can go off and make lots of money, Danny can go be a musician or whatever, and I’ll get a cute ass dog.”
“...is getting a dog your only ambition?”
“Yes. Yes it is.”
And they laughed for the rest of the night, feeling like actual teenagers that fit in and love life for the first time in awhile. And Danny watched as the world around him blended together like some technicolour dream. He took a bite of his ordinarily typical “teenager” food and it brought a grin to his smile. He finally slotted himself into picturesque picture that he wanted to be apart of.
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
“You’re such a dickhead!”
Danny wasn't a fan of fights. I mean, that’s pretty normal. Most people don’t like fights. But he really hated fights. Especially when it’s between some of his favourite people.
He watched Courtney stand virtually on top of Roy, with his body cowering down onto the ground, his expression terrified. Danny didn’t really know what to do. Or what just happened. He swore that Courtney had just slapped Roy across the face but he didn't know whether she actually did or not.
And he didn't know what to say. Or if he was even supposed to say something. He just sort of stood there and watched it unfold, his body frozen in a stance of shock.
All he knew was that, a moment earlier, they were fine. Well, as fine as it could be. Courtney demanded for them to all hang out one afternoon at Danny’s house for once, mostly because his mom wasn’t going to be home for a while. And so they sat by the lounge room with a freshly opened packet of chips and a mostly fine atmosphere.
It was until Courtney brought up that whole Dan thing that things went to absolute shit. Danny wondered why Roy never decided to defend himself. Say what he told him. That he told Dan a lie to protect her. But he just stayed silent the whole time, taking in Courtney’s screams. And it hurt him. But what hurt him more was that he didn’t say anything to help him out.
“Why did you fucking tell him that?! You embarrassed me in front of the whole school!”
“Sorry Court...I guess I said an inappropriate joke again and he took it seriously…”
“A joke?! Really?!”
“Come on tell her the truth Roy,” it was the first thing Danny said. And Courtney snapped her attention towards him with a shocked expression.
“What is he talking about?” she asked him sharply. Roy gulped.
“I-I don’t…”
“You obviously do. Tell me Roy, what is he saying?” she was on the verge of shouting, her words echoing through his house.
Roy glared over to him, Danny instantly feeling horrible.
“Fine then,” she grumbled. “Danny,” the younger boy looked over to her. “You tell me then. What did Roy do?”
“I-I don’t think I should…” he scratched the back of his neck awkwardly. “I don’t really want to be involved in this…”
“You got involved in it the moment you knew about whatever the heck is going on!” she cried. “Danny? Who’s side are you on? I mean, I didn’t do anything wrong! Obviously Roy did some shitty-”
“He did it to protect you Courtney,”
She took a step back.
“W-What…?” she stammered. Danny sighed heavily.
“He did it to protect you Courtney,” he repeated. “He thought that if Dan broke up with you...you’d be happy. He knew that you wouldn't break up with him, so this was the only way.”
“Roy…” she gazed down at him and helped him up. “I didn’t…” she groaned into her hand. “I feel like an idiot...I just thought…”
“Why would I humiliate you in front of the whole school? Oh come on Court, I care about you,” he frowned. She gasped.
“So that black eye the other day-?”
“That had nothing to do with it,” he reassured. “I-It was something stupid that happened in the musical and-”
“That’s not true,” Danny stepped in, giving him a worried yet firm look. “...Dan hurt him. Because of what happened.”
“Roy!” she bit down on her lip. “I can't believe you'd get yourself in danger like that, a-and not tell me. We’re going to fix this. We’ll get back at him and-”
“No, don’t do that,” he soothingly ran his hand over her back. “You don't need to do that. It'll make everything worse…” he shook his head. “Plus, it’s alright now. There's nothing we can do and Dan’s out of your life now which is all I wanted.”
“Well...about that…” she cleared her throat. “Wait. Didn't you see what happened at school the other day? With Dan and…?”
“No,” he denied. “I guess that’s why I didn't really get what you meant by humiliating but…”
“He wants us to get back together,”
“W-What?” the boys nearly screamed at her.
“Shit Court,” Danny mumbled. “Are you kidding? You don’t even like him.”
“I know I don't,” she looked aside. “But I guess…” she shrugged. “I don’t know…”
“Please don't tell me it’s because of your image because we’re not going back there,” he argued.
“I’m just considering it,” she sighed. “That's all. But...I…can't...because-”
“Spit it out Court,”
“Getting back with Dan would mean I’m cheating on him…?”
Roy raised an eyebrow.
“Uh...we didn't actually hook up…?” he said in confusion.
“No I mean,” she shut her eyes tightly. “I’m dating Willam.”
“What?!” they actually screamed at her this time, complete shock washing over their faces.
“Oh my god,” Danny’s expression melted into laughter. “I can’t believe it!” he hugged her tightly. “Good job! Oh holy fucking shit Court! I can't believe it! Finally.”
“Aww Danny,” she smiled into his neck.
“Who asked who out? What happened? Have you guys slept together?”
“Ummm...no one really asked anyone out. We kind of kissed one time and it became a thing, it was cute though and…” she coughed. “No comment Danny.”
He shrieked at the response like an excited teenage girl.
“Oh my god Courtney!” he wheezed. “This is adorable. Is your ship name Witney?”
“Danny!” she giggled. “Stop it! Jeez, you’re so embarrassing.”
“But it’s so cute!” he excitedly grabbed onto her hands.
“Yeah…” Roy joined in with a small murmur. “G-Good job Court…”
He awkwardly patted her on the back, only giving a minimal grin, which made her back hunch over with discomfort.
“Wow...sounds very nice Roy…” his nose twitched at the answer.
“Roy has good intentions though, right?” Danny intruded with a positive voice.
“I want to hear Roy say that,” the blonde grumbled.
“I don’t think you want to hear that…” Roy confessed with a slightly minimal voice.
“You should watch what you say then,” she sounded a little more riled up.
“I just don’t think that she’s a good influence…” he tried to warn, standing his own ground. “Like, really Court? Willam? She’s dodgy as hell, she’s a heavy drinker, she’s really bitchy, and didn’t she try and kick you off the squad once?”
“Well,” she crossed her arms and kissed her lips. “She used to be dodgy, I admit that. But the last time she went to the party was, like, a year ago. Especially since ‘Lasky became sober, everyone stopped. And Will’s super supportive of her and promised that she would lay off too. And she tried to kick me off the squad because she was intimidated by me.”
“Wow sounds like a stable relationship…” he rolled his eyes.
“You've been such a dick to me for this whole day,” she complained. “Maybe the reason why we broke apart is because you became such a dick in the last few years.”
Danny gasped.
“Court, come on,” Danny tried to reason, but she pushed him aside.
“I'm done with you people.”
And she stormed out, leaving Danny to stare over to Roy with shock. Like their relationship suddenly plummeted in a single moment.
“...why did you do that?” Danny mumbled, guilt and doubt filling his chest.
“I was just telling the truth,” he shrugged, his voice almost too stiff.
“Why would you say something like to Courtney?”
“Are you taking her side right now?” he snickered. Danny gritted his teeth.
“Of course I am! She did nothing wrong! Unlike you apparently…”
“Oh, so you are taking her side,” he rolled his eyes again.
“Because she deserves our support!” he groaned. “Why do you have to be such a dick all the time?”
“A dick? I’m just trying to help,”
“I can’t be with someone who makes fun of Courtney like that!”
Roy bit his tongue and inhaled quickly. He clenched his fists and gave a small hint of vulnerability before he rushed out of his house.
And Danny just stood there. Stunned.
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
Danny wasn't used to this weird break between the three of them. They'd fought before, obviously, actually quite a lot this year, but they weren’t used to...this. This was different. It wasn’t some petty fight or a situation that let them cheer each other up. It was just a mess, to say it simply. Courtney was hurt by Roy, and so was Danny, but it wasn't something they could “bond” over. Danny tried. He really did. To make everything work. Courtney stopped texting him and she left him on read a couple of times which hurt him. But in return, he’d read Roy’s texts and refused to reply. To a point where it became overbearing and hurtful so he had to switch his phone off. Because just seeing them made him feel bad but, he knew that he couldn't forgive him. Because he always did that and he didn't want to anymore. For the sake of Courtney.
“This is such a crap movie”
To get his mind off of everything, he decided to meet up with his friends. Other friends. The friends that weren’t being over the top and dramatic for once. It was different, but he wasn't complaining. He was just thankful that he had somewhere to go. And someone to talk to.
“Is not. This is a classic”
He watched Kurtis and Max’s usual banter unfold on the sofa. The sofa he hadn’t laid on for a while. He missed the feeling of the fabric. He just felt like he was in his second home in a way, especially while he was in his own space on the sofa. It felt...right to have their own little section of the couch as they sat there and chatted like regular teenagers.“That romance was unnecessary,” Matt joined in with a small chortle. “Aww I liked that romance. I thought it was so cute,” Jason pouted by his lap. “Okay, nevermind, it was a great romance,”Max rolled his eyes. “That's so biased,” he drew out a loss from the debate. “It’s unfair.”“I didn't like the movie that much,” Danny chimed in with a smile, receiving an equally bright smile back. Well, more bright. Mostly because Danny’s was a little forced more than is should’ve been. But then again, Max was looking at him like he knew something was wrong.It was mostly due to the text he gave him before.
DANNY: can we meet up?
MAX: with the whole group?
MAX: or just us two?
DANNY: whole group
MAX: sure thing
MAX: do you want to talk about it?
DANNY: not really…
MAX: that’s fine
MAX: I’ll organise it now on the group chat
He always seemed like the most understanding one. A person that never questioned Danny because he didn't need to. He just understood. And Danny loved that about him.
“So…?” Jason started, his voice filled with confidence. This usually meant that he wanted gossip. “Roy. How's that going? After you rekindled your relationship and all.”
His chest sunk.
“Umm...yeah. It’s been…” he pondered for the word. “...you know.”
Shit.
“You guys are so on and off,” Kurtis complained. “I can never keep up.”
“It’s a complex situation I guess,” he explained, his throat aching from the distaste for the topic. “It wasn’t really a problem between us. More like Courtney...b-but it’s just...hard to explain.”
“Explain it then,” Jason enthused. “I love gossip.”
“But it isn't exactly gossip,” he brushed off. “And it’s not really my place to say.”
“Okay, that’s enough for Danny,” Max intruded. “We shouldn't just hassle him for information that doesn't affect us whatsoever.”
“But Courtney’s a cheerleader too. We’re, like, basically friends,” Jason joked.
“Maybe it’s been an emotional ride for Danny though. Maybe we shouldn't just talk about it…”
“Yeah...I just don't really want to think about it right now…” he admitted. “I’m just trying to help Courtney through the situation though I guess. As of now. She’s sort of struggling with things right now and it’s bothering me. I always need to cheer her up. I-I mean I’m not complaining. I want her to be happy but...it can get overbearing. Sometimes.”
Max pursed his lips.
“...is there something else going on for you though Danny?” he asked quite minimamly.
“Yeah, because you’re having to handle quite a large load with all this crap about other people,” Kurtis continued on.
“Yeah, of course,” he denied weakly. “I’m used to it though...I guess.”
“Don't act like everything is always okay Danny because we’ve all seen how you’ve been going,” Max said firmly, throwing the atmosphere off a few degrees. “And I feel like you need to tell us something but for some reason...you’re not."
There was a pause, like it was for Danny to breathe.
“Everyone has their own reasons, sure,” Kurtis helped him through it, gazing towards Max with a reassuring look in his eyes. And then he looked at Danny with the same aura of confidence. “But I think what we’re trying to get here is…” he swallowed. “We’re worried about you,” Danny widened his eyes. “You've spent so much time worrying about us that I think that you don’t worry about yourself. And what you’re going through. And how much burden you put on yourself because of others.”
The youngest boy didn't reply. He couldn't reply. He gave a quick inhale and bit down on his lip, from confusion and somewhat fear.
“I remember that you said that you had bad sleeping patterns like half a year ago,” the cheerleader also entered the conversation, his voice soft and sweet. “But you still look like you’re not sleeping well enough. You have huge circles under your eyes, you’re losing so much weight and your hair is really growing out. You honestly look like you’re withering away…” he cleared his throat to wash away his cracking words. Matt soothingly embraced him.“...and it makes us really worried...”
“And you know you can trust us with anything, right?” Matt finally added, his expression softening. “You’re allowed to spill the T, and say whatever you want to say. You deserve it. You can trust us to listen to you and help you.”
“Because you deserve that,” Max finalised, shuffling a little closer to him.
He proceeded to wipe away a tear that Danny didn’t even realise was there. One that was travelling down his cheek. And he felt his stomach fold over at the way they all looked at him.
He cried. Danny Noriega, for the first time in so long, cried in front of people. Instead of smashing his face into a pillow and wailing until his throat went dry, he was there, crying into the shoulder of a friend, and comforted by those who loved him.
It felt better, to be crying, surrounded by the people that you love dearly. Because for the first time in...well, forever, he felt like he wasn't alone. Alone in fighting and living. And it felt fucking great.
He felt Max’s warm hand press against the middle of his back.
“It’s okay Danny,” he whispered through his hair, his voice calm. “You’re allowed to be stressed, and you’re allowed to feel like things are too much sometimes. And it’s okay to take breaks to take your mind off of things.”
“Maybe we need to go out and have some fun. Mindless fun. Just for a little while,” Kurtis suggested with a small smile. “Act like teenagers and fool around.”
“But still be true to ourselves, you know?” Matt added. “Let’s be honest, we’re a little different from most kids our age,” he chuckled. “But there’s nothing wrong with that. It’s kind of cool actually. We’re, like, super punk rock.”
“We’re alty,”
“Jason, don’t say alty,”
“And we’re sorry it’s a Sunday night so we can’t do anything…” Max explained with a slight frown. “But if we had time, we could’ve done something really fun.”
“I mean…”
“No Kurtis, we’re not going to ditch school,” he rubbed his temples.
“Why not?”
“Because it’s nearly the end of the term and we want to all do well. Of course,” he grinned. “We can do something fun in spring break.”
Jason gasped.
“Oh my god Max! Are we finally going to get drunk at the beach because I’ve been waiting for-”
“What? No! I’m saying we can do stuff like...go-karting! Or like bowling, or like the movies and all that jazz,” he explained, somewhat flustered.
“Over spring break? Maybe we can do something like the city trip again. That was fun right?” Matt asked over to Danny with a huge grin. “You loved that, right?”
“Of course I did…” he choked out, his voice trembling a little. “I honestly just like being with you guys,” the others chuckled at his teary words. “I don’t mind. Even this is more than enough for me.”
“You know what?” Jason began, running his hand down his arm. “We’re going to organise something for us. And it’ll be a fun surprise for you,” he exchanged looks with the other boys. “Seriously Danny. You deserve it. I’ll plan something so bomb, it’s unforgettable.”
“Y-You really don’t need-”
“Shut up Danny. I’m doing it.”
And they laughed for the rest of the night, curled up on the couch with some irrelevant TV show playing in the background. They shared stories and anecdotes and embarrassing gossip they all seemed to store up, and the had the best night in a while. Danny finally realised something. They really were forever. They really were eternal.
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
It’s been an odd week for Danny. He had no contact with Roy or Courtney but had plenty with his friends. It was like it once was, but Danny wasn’t really keen on calling it nostalgia. It felt a little empty, actually. But he managed.Until he couldn't really so he invited Courtney over to his house.She had a short temper sometimes, depending on what it was, so he knew that he had to give her a week until she completely watered down. But she seemed fine now. Like the atmosphere between them was virtually back to normal when she sat down on his sofa. “Okay, how was the cheer comp though?” Danny asked, nibbling on biscuits his mom provided for them. That was actual nostalgia. Them, on Danny’s couch, sipping on tea and eating biscuits. They used to do that a lot when they were younger, and they would act like posh adults and laugh at their acting. “We won!” she rejoiced with a huge grin. She lowered the cup of tea onto the table. “Oh my god Court! That’s amazing! Did you get a trophy and everything?”“Yeah! It was like…” she reminisce with a dorky smile. “Amazing. Borderliner perfect.”“That sounds great…” he rested his head against the back of the sofa. “I’m glad. I know you guys were working really hard for it.”“We really were…” she glanced down at her lap. “I’m glad. It feels like we've gone through a full circle, you know? With the squad and all…” she sniffed. “And soon, I’m not going to be captain anymore…”“You still have so much time until you give it up though Court,” Danny reminded with a smile.“I know...but…” she pursed her lips. “I don't want all of this to be over just yet. I want to wake up and see my uniform hung up every morning, and come to school to sit on the popular table with Will and ‘Lasky. And I want to walk back from school with you and do the cycle over and over again,” she teared up slightly. “I’m not ready to grow up. At all. I hate this place, I hate this town and I really hate that I can’t be openly happy but…” she brushed aside her tears. “...I like the feeling of being here. I like the feeling of having a routine and have everything fit into place so perfectly. I can’t...think of stepping out of here. Having real responsibilities and having real problems I have to deal with.”“Court…” he sympathetically gazed over to her.“I don’t want this all to just disappear…” she mumbled. “I don’t want to choose between growing old here and eventually dying unhappy, or move away and be forgotten altogether.”“Courtney, no one’s going to forget you,” she widened her eyes. “You’re unforgettable,” he smiled warmly. “And no one should discredit you for following your dreams to be happy. If they do, you don't need them. You do only live once, and why would you want to waste that limited time we have on people who don't want you? People who don't want to get to know you?”Courtney embraced him tightly, squeezing him tightly to vent out her frustrations. And then she sighed deeply, exhaling a warm breath into his neck until she felt alright again.“You’re absolutely right Danny…” she nuzzled into his neck. “Why would I want to be with people who would actually hate me anyway, right?”They snickered together.“Look Court, there’s one thing I need to tell you…” Danny explained, his voice a tad firmer. She nodded over to him. “...it’s about Roy.”She rolled her eyes at the name. “Do not get me started on him,” she slapped her own face.“Yeah...we’re not on talking terms either,” he pressed his lips together. “I haven't even seen him at all at school.”“Me either…” she pondered for a while. “I wonder if he’s okay actually…”“I bet he is,” he brushed off.“Well,” Courtney started. “You do know him better than I do. You always have.”“Yeah about that…” he cleared his throat. “I don't know what's happening between us now, so it might not matter but…” he found it a lot easier to admit it. Now that Roy was virtually out of the picture. Which was a weird thought. “We were actually kind of dating…”Courtney gasped loudly, her voice echoing through the whole house.“No way!” she screamed. “What the heck?! How?!”“I-I don’t really know,” he flustered. “All I know is that...one day it kind of clicked. I guess. And we weren't supposed to tell anyone but…”“Are you two still together?”“I have no idea, actually,” he glanced down.“Wait, then why was he against Willam and I?”“I have no idea,” he repeated. “I know him well but...sometimes I just really don't get him. Honestly. He confuses me.”“Old morals maybe?” she suggested. “But I don't get him either…” she shook her head. “I bet he’s thinking about you nonstop. That's something I know for sure.”“Well I am too…” he admitted with a reluctant expression. “I’m sorry I kind of ruined it for you two I didn’t mean-”“Courtney, it’s not your fault,” he grinned. “Honestly. If Roy has issues like this, I don’t know if I can handle him anyway. Maybe it’s for the best…” he shook his head. “But that doesn't mean I’m giving up on him.”“Maybe…” she began. “You should stop over complicating everything in your head? It sounds like this mess is jumbling up with your thoughts a little. I think you need a break from Roy for a while and just focus on you and your school work maybe.”Danny snickered.“School work? When have I ever cared about school work?”“Yeah, I’ve never been that big of a fan myself but, it might come in handy since this is your second last year of school. Ever,” she emphasised greatly. “Maybe you’ll regret it. Have you ever thought of next year?”“All the time,”“Because all of us will be gone. And that includes the friends you sit with now,” she pursed her lips. “Which is ashame.”“Yeah...it is…” he bit down on his lip. “But that also makes me wonder if...I want to drop out…?”Courtney scoffed. “You say crazy stuff sometimes Danny, but this has to be the craziest,”“Why? What am I going to get with an education anyway?”“A good paying job,”“That I don’t like,” he argued. “I’ve never liked school, but I’ll also hate being an adult if I have some desk job! I’ve never been like that Court, and you know it. I want to be a-”“Musician. I know. Probably a singer, songwriter. Does alternative rock mostly, maybe a little pop if you’re willing. Maybe when you become more popular,” she snickered. “And you’ll write angsty lyrics that you’ve saved up from your teenage years and you’ll be popular on Tumblr mostly as this new, hot, gay alternative artist that wears beanies,” Danny laughed amusingly. “I know you Danny...and if that’s really want you want then…” she sighed. “I guess I can’t stop you in any way. You would also really suck at sitting still in an office.”“I can’t even sit still in class,” they both giggled. “...thanks for understanding Court.”“I’m always going to be here for you Danny. I always have, and I always will.”
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
Bourbon and coke. Danny’s new favourite drink. He forgot how much he drank, but he knew that he drank enough to feel light headed. He thought that they all stopped doing shit like this. Especially because of Matt and his current state, but he thought wrong.It was the first night of spring break. A week of nothing. Thank god.He was pretty sure some song was playing through the radio. It was indistinguishable but it felt tingly and nice to listen to. The glass loosely sat between his fingertips as he collapsed his head down onto the sofa. It’s spring break - the week of nothing - but all he could do was think about Roy. And what he was doing. Danny didn’t see him at all for a whole week, but he didn't have the heart to try and find him or even text him. “Stop it Danny,” Kurtis slurred, stumbling next to him. He virtually fell on top of him as he sat down. “Stop thinking about Roy! I told you already, he’s fine! He’s been at school...he’s been in his classes, I think...he’s been at school…”“Kurtis, you already said that,” Max rolled his eyes, partially annoyed at the atmosphere. Danny figured that Max was just having a bad day. Well, a really bad day. His time over at Kurtis’s was made up of sulking in the corner and reading some news article on his phone with a huge frown on his face. Danny felt a little bad at the image. Jason and Matt were long gone. Well, not really. They were in the house but...somewhere else? Danny was glad that they weren’t near them because things would’ve been awkward, but he actually had no idea where they went either. And so there’s the three of them. Danny glanced down to the ground and saw Kurtis rolling around like an idiot. Scratch that. The two of them. Because Kurtis is acting incredibly strange.“What’s wrong Max?” Danny felt like he was on anesthesia or something because he felt drowsy all of a sudden.“Today’s just been...too much…” Max pinched his nose. “I don't enjoy this stuff. Everyone knows that but chooses to ignore it constantly. And with Matt’s current state, I’m pretty sure this isn’t the best.”“B-But it’s the first day of Spring Break!” he whined.“Danny, I was really hoping you weren’t going to be this type of person,” he complained back, making the younger boy swallow his words.“...sorry…” he mumbled out. “You should sober up a bit,” he leaned over to the side table and reached over to a bottle of water. He unscrewed the cap for him and made Danny hold onto it. “You should drink this. If you feel like throwing up tell me, then I’ll take you to the bathroom.”“...why are you doing all of this...for me?” he just managed to speak out.“Because I still care about you Danny. And I’m going to look after you,” he gazed past the boy and stared over at Kurtis and groaned. “But let me take care of Kurtis first.”He hopped up from the couch and dragged him by the hand. Danny’s vision blurred around the sight of Kurtis being picked up and physically taken to the bathroom. He felt sick. But not in the way he thought he would. He just kind of felt like he wanted to breathe fresh air and collapse onto the clouds. Or he wanted to shout into the night sky and sing until the stars took him in as one of his own. He just wanted to collapse and sink into the sea. He was just tired.Especially now that the musical was abruptly cancelled, he went back to doing nothing. Courtney was especially devastated, but she blamed Roy harshly the moment she heard it and Danny didn’t want to bring up anything with her. But he was upset too. He actually felt like he was apart of something, and spending time with people he never knew he could get along with, like Sharon, was a nice change in his life. He was going to miss it. But he didn’t really want to beg Roy to hold it again anyway. It felt like a break up to him, in a sense. The fact that he just messaged the messenger group chat, left it, and disbanded the Facebook group just to never speak of it again in real life was kind of harsh. And Danny hated it. But of course he did nothing about it.Max. That was probably why he was so upset. He really was passionate about being in the musical. Danny instantly felt bad, like a banging of guilt hit his chest. He lowered the glass of bourbon coke as best as he could with his shaky hands onto the table, seeing only a thin liquid pooling at the bottom. His eyes oddly fixated onto it as he tried to regain his composure. “Kurtis is throwing up in the bathroom. Gross,” the taller boy came walking in with a frustrated walk. Danny couldn't blame him though. “I’m just going to leave him in there until he feels better. And what about you? Have you been drinking the water.”“No,” he, for some reason, told the truth. Max eyed him like a motherly parent. “Danny, drink the water. You need it,” and so he held the bottle by his lips, forcing him to drink a few gulps until Danny resisted against him. He felt like a stupid child. But at this point, he kind of was.“You don't need to mother me all the time,” he said as firmly as possible, though he stumbled a little. “But you do need my help right now,” Max grinned, maybe borderline smirked at Danny’s state. It was a really different look for him, but Danny wasn’t complaining. The taller boy, in this angle and with this expression, looked amazing in his eyes. Almost unrecognisable but still so likeable. He blushed at the thought. “So you should sit back. And drink more water.”So he did as told and crossed his legs on the sofa, chugging the water. It felt cool down his throat as he gulped.“There you go,” the older boy smiled. “Now let’s position you down sideways. We don’t want you to choke on your own vomit, so this is the best position.”Max continued to blabber on, more than usual, but mostly because he finally had the opportunity to completely take charge. And he was kind of taking advantage of Danny’s state. He couldn't lie. He borderline liked it.“Do you still like me?” he blurted out, his body collapsing onto its side. Max exhaled at the answer and gazed down at him.“Does that matter?” he muttered out, kneeling in front of him to meet his eyes. “A little…” he hugged himself.“I’ll tell you when you’re sober,” he chuckled to himself. “But I won’t remember to ask you when I’m sober!” he tried to sit up again, but Max hurriedly tried to make him lie back down. “I just wanna know…”“But it doesn't matter Danny. Like you said, we’re still friends,” he rested his hands onto his shoulders and gently pushed him down. “And it doesn't matter whether we’re together or not.”
Roy.
The thought just pulsed into his mind. And his voice hitched.“Max,” he uttered, falling back onto his shoulder. “Kiss me.”“W-What?” he sputtered out, blinking like he just awoke. “Danny, come on. Don’t do this.”“I want you to,” he gulped his thoughts down, the aftertaste of the alcohol still on his tongue. “Just do it Max.”“Danny,” he let himself snicker a little as he shook his head. “I know that you and Roy are together,” Danny widened his eyes. “You’ve hinted at it, so I just figured that that was the case. Anyway, I’m happy for you. And I don’t want you to go off and ruin this relationship for yourself.”“R-Roy and I...aren’t…?”“Things seem to constantly be complicated between you two, but either way, I’m guessing that you’re still officially together, correct?” Danny stared over to him, dumbfounded, and gave him a small nod. “Then the most mature thing to do is to be loyal to him. I can tell that you’re upset by something that happened, but hopefully you’ll make it through. At this point, you just need to sort things out with him, not avoid him, and resolve the conflict. And what you’re trying to do here,” he gestured in the space between them. “With us? Is not fixing the problem. You’re making the problem worse. And you don't want to do that. I know you. I know you want to be with Roy and patch things up. You just don’t have the heart to it.”As Max breathed out his final words, he felt his own heart pulse under his own weight. He just tried to hold up the confident look for as long as he could. Max tried to wrap his head around what just happened. What he just did. In a way, he kind of threw himself under the bus. But maybe it was because he was the bigger person. He knew what was right and he stuck by it. He sucked in his lips and bit down on his tongue.He gazed back at Danny, his eyes wide with awe. He looked like he completely melted into the moment, his words seeping into the skin.Maybe, in a way, this is all that Max wanted to do. To see Danny like this. To let Danny experience something as amazing at the power of words. To let Danny experience the state that Max was in on that night in the city. When the skyline was perfect and the stars looked down at them with joy.“...why didn't I fall in love with you instead…?” the phrase escaped his lips unintentionally. Max’s chest clenched and unclenched with his breathing pattern.“Because we’re friends Danny…” he felt the urge for tears building up in his chest. It was about to overfill. “And we’re better off as friends…”And so he sealed the deal with that. Max signed his letter goodbye to their relationship ever meaning more. Ever being more. But he was okay with it. More than he thought he would be. Danny froze and went pale.“W-What's wrong Danny?” Max asked, concerned.And he suddenly got up and ran. Turns out he needed to throw up. Thank god Max missed that sight. As he sat back on the lounge chair, he reimagined the night, wondering the countless possibilities they could have had together. All the things they could have experienced and seen. “You okay?” Matt came stumbling into the room, clearing his throat. He was much more sober than the rest of them. “Sorry I took so long. I convinced Jason to sleep so he wouldn’t feel so sick.”Max smiled, feeling the book of him and Danny close politely. “Yeah,” he shrugged. “A little over it, to be honest. Kurtis and Danny are throwing up in the bathroom.”“Gross,”“I know,” they both snickered. “You should head off to bed too, I think. I’ll take care of the other two, don’t worry.”“Are you sure?” a yawn fluttered in his cheeks. “Yeah. You deserve a rest,” he shrugged off. “Goodnight Max.”“Goodnight Matt.”
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
“Wait, wait maybe I don’t want this cut,” Danny hastily butted in. He stared at himself in the mirror, maybe for the last time with long hair. Or the last time in general. He gulped.“Why not? Your hair’s way too long,” Kurtis measured the tips of his hair with his fingers. “You’ll look great with short hair Danny,” Max complimented through the mirror.Danny gulped.They were all in the bathroom, huddled around the youngest boy who sat on a chair by the mirror. He knew that 5 would be squishy, but today was a 6. Matt told him that Brian F was supposedly a hairstylist, well in training anyway, so he would be great for the task. But Danny didn't know what to believe really.“Okay I’m thinking…” Brian started, scissors angled so that it would shine into his eyes. “We just cut this short. Just completely short. Go all out.”“What? No!” Danny protested. “I-I’d look...stupid.”“No you won’t Danny. You need this. Seriously,” Jason grinned towards him, a little bit devilishly. His voice hitched as the scissors snapped right by his ear. It sent a tremble through his body, and when he opened his eyes reluctantly to look over, he saw that his locks sat just by his ear. He sat there in shock.“Oh my god,” he exclaimed as Brian wavered the bundle towards his face.“Look at all that hair, jesus,” he gave a small chuckle. “Okay, now the rest of it.”Danny felt like he needed to hold onto Max’s hand while he chopped off the rest of it. He felt it feather down his face as they fell. Danny knew something was a little off between them. That’s the only thing he seemed to think while getting his haircut, so he could get his mind off of the literal metres-long-worth-of-hair getting chopped down. He was sure that something went down last night between them. But he wasn’t exactly sure what actually happened. All he remembers was the banging headache that he had when he woke up and the bitter taste of bourbon on his lips. Like old bourbon left in the sewers of something. He didn't like it. And after a few hangover remedies for all of them that Max provided, they fetched Brian F and started randomly making him over. Even though Danny kind of liked his own aesthetic.
“All done Danny Boy,”
When he opened his eyes again, he saw a completely new person. Who knew a haircut could make someone look so different? His dark locks were now evenly trimmed by the tops of his ears, and they swerved down to the brace of his neck, but nothing grazed the shoulders. It was much shorter than what he was used to. But he oddly liked it. It made him look...a little younger, yeah, but you could see his features more. His expression. Maybe his voice would come out clearly now too.“There you go,” Brian lowered the scissors onto the sink. “Now we can see that pretty little face of yours,” Jason snickered. “I like this on you.”“Yeah, it makes you look a lot more genuine,” Kurtis said honestly, making Danny feel a little self conscious. “You look good either way though,” Max chimed in with a grin. “Okay, now let’s get this mess cleaned up,” they all gazed down at the ground, the marble floor pooling with his hair. “And then watch a movie or something.”“Can it be legally blonde?”“No Jason, we’re not watching legally blonde again.”Danny liked it when they sat back and watched movies, but he wasn't a big fan of doing it with another person. He was fine with Brian now, sure, but he still didn't particularly want a whole nother body added onto the couch. And he could tell that a lot of the others didn't like that either, so they were quick to ditch the movie idea and go out to town. Kurtis’s house was situated somewhat around the mall, mostly around more shops which was nice. Danny didn't really have a chance to go around that area because he didn't live conveniently enough around the shops. So this was a nice change.“We should go to the beach or something in a few days,” Jason suggested, his lips around a straw. Danny liked the taste of the milkshakes from this random cafe they decided to sit at. “Mmm, it is getting a little colder though,” Kurtis reminded. “This is probably the coldest spring we’ve ever had.”“It’s only early spring I guess,” Danny noted. “Maybe we can go in a few weeks or something.”“And I can’t make it,” Max played around with the straw with his index finger. “I have a performance at the Conservatorium of Music again.”“Oh my god Max. Good job,” Brian smiled over.“Thanks,” he glanced down at his drink. “But you’re obviously allowed to go out and do something by yourselves. I don't mind.”“We can do something else on another day though,” Matt twirled his colourful straw. “I know a really fun place out of town.”“Is it that the place McCook keeps on mentioning?” Brian rolled his eyes. “Because I don’t know if Max would like that place…”“What is that supposed to mean?” Max fought.“It’s a gay bar,” he said blatantly. “Oh…” “Wait, why would you want to go? You’re already taken,” Danny pointed out. “Because it’ll be fun. I wouldn’t mind going somewhere that only played good music and served fruity cocktails,” he shrugged.“How would we get in?”“McCook knows a guy,” Brian added with a small hint of excitement. “I’m not coming though. Not really my gig.”“Me either,” Max rolled his eyes. “And please stop being so attracted to danger Matt.”“Well it is my middle name,” Jason piped in, laughing at his own joke as he nudged Matt. “I hate this,” Kurtis cackled, taking a sip of his sweet drink. “But it’s settled. This will be the best spring break ever.”“No regrets,” Brian started a toast, holding his drink up into the air.
“No regrets.”
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
This was Danny’s favourite idea. He excitedly fiddled with his tie, trying to straighten it up as he stared at himself in the mirror.“C’mere,” Jason turned him around, tightening up the tie up to his neck. Maybe suffocating him a little. “Babe have you finished ironing his jacket?”“I think so…?” Matt walked over to him, Danny’s suit jacket held between his hands. “I-I don’t really know how to iron…”Jason inspected it. “Good enough,” he made the younger boy put it on before he judged him up and down. “Yeah, okay. He looks good.”“Wait let me gel down his hair,” Kurtis swerved around him. “We’re gonna run late,” Matt rushed to fetch the keys, opening the front door. Danny cringed at the smell of the gel, and fought against Kurtis’s harsh force through his locks. He swore that they cared about this more than the annual ball.They dashed into the car hastily, and Kurtis slammed his whole foot down onto the accelerator. Danny brought out his phone to examine himself.“Do you have the directions?” Kurtis asked, preoccupied by his unpolished hair.“What? Oh fuck,” Jason hurried to open his phone. “Shit. We’re really unorganised without Max,” Matt wiped a sweat from his forehead. “And we have to get there in time because we’re doing this for him.”“I’m actually so excited to see him perform,” Kurtis excitedly said. “And he’s going to be so surprised to see us.”“Do you think we’ll be late?” Jason asked. “No, we’ll make it. Traffic’s good today,” Danny informed, running his hands down his trousers. “Well, that’s what my mom said anyway. There’s a game on kind of close to here but it's just far enough to miss the traffic.”“That hockey one?” Kurtis asked.“Yeah,” Matt answered. “All of the footballers are going and they won’t stop talking about it.”“You still sit with them?”“In class sometimes,” he shrugged. “Timber and construction is kind of made up of them so…”“You’d think that they would break up their little “squad” now that they lost their games so they’re inactive for awhile,” Jason pointed out with a smirk. “It’s for popularity’s sake,” Kurtis rolled his eyes. “Isn’t that why most people stay together? Let’s be honest, high school’s all about labels.”“But it’s funny because none of it matters when we graduate,” Danny snickered. “I doubt they’ll get a job just for being “popular in high school”.”Danny sat there for a moment, thinking over his own words. He realised something. Something from a random phrase he thought was fitting for the topic. He was right. It was easy to say it all the time but it was different to understanding it. Just to sit there and know that what they do now, in a way, doesn't matter. The things that people claim that are important, like labels and popularity and whatever group of friends you sit with, don't actually matter when you graduate. They don't determine how amazingly successful you will be. Danny couldn't help but to think about it for the whole trip. Just let the thought sink in. It felt oddly satisfying, but sadly draining, knowing that he probably wasted his time sitting with Jay and Gia for so long. And knowing that his time with his friends were limited. Matt glanced down at his watch.“Fuck yeah. We’re like ten minutes early,” they all hopped out of the car, Danny quickly realising that they had arrived without him noticing.He couldn't recognise this place. It was a large building, looking semi-grand but feeling really grand. Everyone was pleasantly dressed, formal and uptight, and Danny felt odd for actually fitting in in a place like this. The inside was pretty populated, filled with light volumed chatter and a strong sense of formality. Danny gulped.They all walked through the crowd, feeling a tad claustrophobic in the unfamiliar environment. Until they saw him.Max was nervously waiting by the corner of the room, his hands fumbling with the keys of his oboe. He was tapping his feet uncontrollably, and pulling his collar away from his neck. “Max!” Danny was the first one to call out, dashing over to him excitedly.Max’s face completely lit up. He was beaming.“Oh my god!” he bursted out into hysterical excitement. “W-What are you doing here?!”“We’re here to see you perform,” Matt nudged him lightly. “We’ve always wanted to see it.”Max held his breath to not let the tears fall.“You guys…” he held a hand to his lips.“No need to thank us,” Jason cocked his shoulder. “It’s for you.”Danny had never been to a concert before. Actually, none of them had ever been to a concert before. Not like this. They were conveniently sat near the middle on a higher angle, which gave them an amazing view of the stage. A single spotlight struck. And Max came walking out. It was quiet, so quiet that you could hear his footsteps towards the light. He held the reed between his lips and he blew through the instrument.The youngest boy pressed his back against his chair. He was blown away by the sound. It was just as crisp and precise as he remembered. Reedy and bronzy but still calming.He grinned to himself.
So familiar.
“Is that Danny Boy?” Kurtis whispered over in an awe struck state. “Yeah…” he mumbled back, barely audible.He clutched onto the arm of the chair and exhaled deeply. Holy Jesus. He had such an appreciation for Max. There was a breath of silence between Max’s lips parting from the reed and the audience clapping. And that split moment of silence, is what determined how perfect it was. It left people speechless, lead them through this oddly enchanting mindset. Danny actually sat there for a moment, and then cracked a smile for how blown away he was.
“Go Max!”
...so he didn't even think about what his body was doing. He had gotten up, smashing his hands together loudly. Max instantly looked over to him, seeing that one small body standing up from the sea of black, and crazily gestured for him to sit down. Danny froze. Their eyes met and the gazes melted together as Danny found himself unable to sit back down from the awkwardness. It grew a little quiet again, and Danny felt him cringe from the inside out. Until he felt a presence by his side. Kurtis stood up next to him, clapping just as loud, and screaming with just as much passion. He peered his head to the side to see Matt and Jason doing the same, cheering with wide smiles. The musician’s gestures grew, trying to force them to sit down from the embarrassment. He chuckled into his hand, trying to hide his reddening face.That’s when the applause was revived, like it was rising from the ashes. Max’s face instantly lit up, like his expression was refreshed and renewed. His chuckle grew to a cackle of flattery, as he turned even redder and tried to hide it awkwardly.His friends laughed admirably at it. It was really cute, actually. Seeing him so flustered and excited. Danny giggled at the sight. He would have never expected him to be like this just under a year back. Max Malanaphy. He seemed so uptight. Smart. Resilient. Resourceful. Mind over matter. But Danny loved seeing him like this. Seeing him with emotion. Seeing him so flustered and embarrassed, but excited and overwhelmed. In a good way for once. He was truly a shining star.
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
“This...this is the dumbest thing I have ever done”
Danny was super excited. He’d gone out with his friends before, obviously, but this was different. Max was still emotionally high from the concert, so it was the best time for Matt to shove in his idea again. And he actually agreed. And so they all decided to meet up with him early to arrange a look for him. A look that was so different for him, but still suited him. “What are you talking about? These clothes look great on you,” Jason took a step back and grinned. They were still his regular clothes, just rearranged and fitted differently. And also throw in a few of Danny’s shirts too.The only thing that Danny’s mind was slightly caught up on, was the marks by Max’s wrist. He remembers how they looked on the city trip. How raw and red they were. And as he helped him slip on a jacket, he saw them only faintly. Like they were just accidental. He hated that it was a reality but, he was glad that they weren’t new. That he must've felt better and they were just the rotten aftertaste. “You genuinely look smoking hot,” Kurtis commented, almost kind of speechless. Max turned red, somewhat from flattery, somewhat from distaste. “K-Kurtis,” he choked out, as firmly as he could, though it was pretty frail. “What? I’m just saying,” he shrugged.Danny glanced towards Max to fully scan him. The black jeans made him look like a regular teenager for once. The younger boy never really noticed how tall he really was until the clothes he was wearing actually hugged his body. He usually accompanied his shirts with a loose cardigan, non-fitting sweater or large jacket that covered his body a lot. Danny liked this new ensemble of clothing on him more. He was fine to give up that grey shirt he was wearing too. It looked better on him anyway. And that beanie? He had like 10 beanies anyway. “You kind of look like Danny,” Matt commented, making the two snap over to each other. “Maybe even more emo and hipster.”“Hey! That’s my thing,” Danny joked, shoving him lightly.“It’s the grey hair,” Jason pointed out.“I really dig it,” Kurtis added in again, smirking. Max pinched his nose.“Thanks but…” he pulled at his fitted, black jacket. “It’s not really my style.”“But it’s something different right? It’s just for one night,” the ex-football player tried to brighten the mood.Max looked at himself in the mirror one more time.“That’s true,” he nodded. “It’s a nice change.”So they all hopped into the car, Matt driving, and Max instantly felt nauseous. He was already sick of it. He was never the type to enjoy these things, of course, but it was spring break. And he had to do something fun before he graduated, right? This would be the first illegal act he had ever done. Ok, other than egging someone’s house. And breaking that window. Maybe this wasn't so bad.They pulled up at a shady looking bar just out of town. Just far enough to not catch the homophobia. Max gulped. It was darkly lit, the sign barely viewable, and it was a pretty empty street. It meant that if he got stabbed, no one would hear him.“So I have the fake IDs right here,” Matt dug his hands into his pockets and provided one for each boy. How would they get away with this? This was incredibly fake looking. “From McCook who was kind enough to get them for me.”“We’re not gonna get away with this,” Kurtis stared down at his ID, which was made up of his fake birthday and a really sketchy looking portrait. But of course they got away with it. Which left Kurtis completely speechless as he passed. Like gobsmacked. Completely. He swallowed his own words and groaned into his glass of pomegranate martini. Probably the gayest drink he could’ve ordered. He rested his back against the bar, sipping on it with a prideful stance.“You gonna get something fun Max?” he asked, the fruity flavour by his tongue. “No,” he felt obviously uncomfortable. “I’m fine with ginger ale and bitters.”“I’m honestly fine with cranberry soda,” Danny pitched into the conversation, instantly having flashbacks of the other night. He shook his head. “I’m staying sober tonight.”“Babe can you get me a Égalité?” Jason asked over, feeling the sense of acceptance from the environment immediately. It was a nice feeling. He felt like he could be open with Matt for the first time in public. The first time in his life. It was exciting. Almost too exciting, really. “That’s really gay,” his boyfriend joked, leaning against the counter in a suave manner. “I’ll get an apple martini.”“Oh like that’s any less gay,” he playfully wrapped his arms around him, giggling into his neck excitedly. Matt liked the affection a lot, but the feeling of the whole atmosphere even better. “Different kind of Love Song” by Cher was playing in the background, loud enough to feel the rhythm by the dance floor. Danny felt his body ease into the beat, tapping his feet along as he sipped on his drink. It fizzed in his jaw, making him snicker.“Do you wanna dance with me?” Kurtis swerved over to him, taking him by one hand and swinging him around. Danny giggled. “Very smooth Kurtis,” he laughed, lowering the glass onto the counter next to Max, who seemed to be more preoccupied with his drink than anything. Danny wrapped his arms around his waist loosely, rocking from side to side to the song as Kurtis jokingly hugged him. He faintly wondered if he would bring Roy to a place like this. So they could dance like this and laugh without any care in the world.The lit up dance floor was filled with couples, groups and friends who all seemed comfortable and happy with themselves and each other. It had an aroma of acceptance and joy. Danny felt at home here. “Oh hey,” Kurtis spoke up, his words by his right ear. “Look over there.”He pointed over to Max, who was timidly sipping on his drink, except this time, with a guy talking to him, resting on his elbow casually and standing almost too close. Danny felt a little uneasy.“S-Should we help him out? He looks kind of uncomfortable…” he wheezed slightly out of his grasp, but Kurtis quickly reeled him back in. “What are you talking about? He’s totally fine,” they watched Max lower his finished drink onto the counter and talk back, shoving it aside so he had room to rest his arm on top. He shuffled a little closer, looking like he was easing up to the guy a little more. Danny heard Jason call out a tease excitedly. “Good on Max.”“H-He looks like he’s 30…” the younger boy said worriedly.“What? He looks like he’s maybe mid 20s,” Kurtis peered down at him. “You’re really paranoid Danny. They're just talking.”“Hey,” Matt swooped into their conversation, placing a hand onto Danny’s shoulder. He looked towards Jason to see him somewhat frustrated as he clung to his arm. “Do you think Max looks uncomfortable over there? Should we help him?"“Jesus Christ, not you too,” Kurtis slapped himself. “He’s fucking fine! Look,” Max was now leaning over closer, chortling lightly. “He loves it. Why can't we just be happy that he’s easing into loving himself more now?”Matt and Danny swallowed.“Fine…” Danny drawed out, pursing his lips. “I’m just worried about him.”“Why? Because he’s finally into someone that’s not you?”Danny was pretty sure that it was a joke. Okay, mostly sure that it was a joke. But it accidentally made him widen his eyes at the comment, and reevaluate himself as a person. Danny never thought that he’d become a person like that. A person that was this selfish. Honestly. Kurtis draped his arms around him again, just as loosely as last time, and he hummed along with a Cyndi Lauper song softly into his neck. “True Colours”. The technicolour lights around them melted into a colourful hue, surrounding Danny in a warmth he’d never really felt before.
Show me a smile then
Don't be unhappy, can't remember
He began to sing lightly, gazing up at Kurtis with a grin. If he closed his eyes, he could actually feel his body completely warm up. His skin soaked in the atmosphere, and it was buzzing through his limbs. It was like he was high, even though he was completely sober. It was indescribable.
When I last saw you laughing
If this world makes you crazy
He wanted to be in a state like this forever. He wanted to live in a place where he got these highs and he could breathe it every moment.
And you've taken all you can bear
You call me up
Why couldn't Roy by there. He pursed his lips at his own comment.
Because you know I'll be there
Danny parted his lips to speak, but he was cut off by his own phone ringing. He glanced down at his beaming pocket, and he shot Kurtis an apologetic look before squeezing through the crowd and towards the bar. He met up with Max for a short moment, only exchanging small grins, before being cut off by that random guy he was talking to. Danny didn't even talk to him once but he had a bad feeling about him. He rubbed him the wrong way.Danny pulled out his phone and stared at the screen. It was Courtney’s photo, blindingly bright on his phone screen. He accepted it and placed it by his ear. “Hello?”“Are you seeing this?” Courtney’s voice was obviously distressed.“I-I’m out right now. With friends,” he said, confused. “Why? What’s going on?”“Something weird is going on on our street,” her voice muffled slightly.“What are you talking about?” Danny called over the bartender with a small gesture. “There are sirens going off Danny,” the younger boy immediately stopped. “I think they’re the police but I don’t know at this point.”“What the fuck?” the song dissolved behind him and he felt the cold rush of reality hit him. “S-Should I head straight home? I-I don’t-”“I don’t know Danny. Maybe you shouldn't head home tonight. At least a few hours,”“I’m gonna come back in a few hours. I want to know what happened,” “Okay, bye,”“See ya.”Danny reluctantly ended the call, shoving it back into his pocket in a somewhat frustrated manner. He sighed heavily, running his hand through his hair.
“What’s wrong Danny?”
Max came by his side, just as the bartender came to his attention.“Long island iced tea,” he answered somewhat harshly, slamming the bill onto the counter.“I thought you weren't drinking tonight,” he said worriedly.“I can afford to have a bit,” he sipped on it for a moment before sighing again. “What’s wrong Danny?” he repeated. “Something’s going on on my street and Courtney told me it was apparently the police or something,” he rubbed his temples. “And I have no idea why.”“That sucks,” Max pouted at the answer. “Should you stay over at someone’s house for the night?”“I’d rather go home but…” he took a few more sips. “Maybe in a few hours. When it dies down.”“That’s fair enough,” Max pulled out a chair. “Why’d you leave me on the dance floor Danny?” Kurtis joined them, and so did Matt and Jason eventually. “Sorry,” he drew out a lighthearted apology. “I needed to get a drink.”“Well the night’s still young and we can still fit in plenty of dances,” Matt reasoned. “Why don’t we all go out now? This song is amazing,” Jason enthused, grabbing him by the shoulders. “And Max better come this time too.”“Fine,” he rolled his eyes and laughed. “Just know that I’m doing this for Whitney Houston. Not you.”He chuckled lightly, holding Danny’s hand through the crowd so they could huddle around the centre of the dance floor. He watched his feet dissolve into the bright lights.Danny looked around at this friends, all messily dancing and cackling at the top of their lungs. And it was perfect. As perfect as it gets. He wondered how he forgot how picturesque they were sometimes. How he just seemed to forget how great they are together and how great he felt when he was with them. Perfect. They were perfect.
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
Danny managed to spend a few more hours at the club before he stumbled home. He was grateful for Matt staying sober because he was actually able to drive them all home safely. Well, “sober”. He had a single drink, but he sobered up with a few glasses of water and he seemed to enjoy dancing so much more than the drinks anyway. Danny loved that. He loved the fact that Matt was stronger now and he was fine without anything. He was fine without the drugs and the drinking and he seemed much happier. He figured that it was probably because of the lack of toxic masculinity in his life after he quit being a footballer. And he focused more on being with his friends, and more specifically, Jason. The younger boy liked watching him dance around with Jason. You could see that he was visibly much healthier. He wasn't as pale anymore and he started to gain back the weight. His clothes were hugging his body much better than it did before. Danny was incredibly happy to see that.
“Uhh, are you sure you don’t want to stay over at one of our houses?”
Kurtis asked over, peering out the window. Matt had parked the car around the corner, because the police seemed to still be there. Danny swallowed but trusted his gut.“Yeah, it’s fine,” he nodded. “I’ll just sneak in from my backyard.”“Have a good night Danny,” Max smiled over, unusually a little happy. He had been since he received that phone number from whoever that guy was. Danny didn’t know his name. He didn’t want to know his name. He was still oddly bitter over what happened, even though Max reassured him that he probably wouldn't ever see him again. Mostly because he was actually underage and the stranger didn't know that. But still. “You too. See ya.”He rushed around the corner, and saw the blinding red and blue lights. There were multiple cars parked along the street, now surrounding his and Roy’s. He instantly gulped. Confusion flooded his body as he dashed into his backyard, jumped the fence and unlocked the back door. He peered outside from the kitchen window, pretending to get a glass of water as casually as he could. Just in case. He saw a police officer lower his gaze and talk to Roy’s parents. Odd. It was the middle of the night, actually closer to the morning really, and they seemed to have a strong expression of concern. Until his mother began to cry.And then it hit him. He pulled out his phone and ran through his contacts, instantly unblocking Roy. A flood of messages began to pop up, each ding sounding more deafening than the last. His phone was genuinely blowing up to a point that it was lagging behind because of the large load.
ROY: pick up
ROY: please pick up Danny
ROY: I want to talk it out
He sent all these message on the night it happened. At 3 AM.
ROY: Danny, I need to talk to you
ROY: and it’s really important
And that was the next day. They weren't the only texts that day. Danny didn’t have the heart to read them all as he scrolled through the countless.
ROY: please Danny
ROY: it’s been three days
ROY: you can’t do this to me
He wondered why he didn't talk to him in person. If it was that important, why didn't Roy come up to him in school and talk to him.
ROY: I don't have the heart to say anything in person…
Danny crinkled his brows.
ROY: I know I’m a coward
ROY: I know I’m an idiot
ROY: but I don't have the heart to talk to you in person
ROY: but I want to still talk it out
Missed call.
ROY: pick it up
ROY: I know you’ve blocked me now
ROY: but I miss you
ROY: please
Then why didn’t he approach him? Why didn't he come up to Danny? Maybe it was because he knew that Danny would’ve been stubborn and he wouldn't have listened at all.
ROY: I want to talk things out
It was the last day of school.
ROY: I know you’re not going to see this
ROY: maybe ever
ROY: but I want to let you know
ROY: that I love you
ROY: and I always have
ROY: more than you would ever know
ROY: bye
That was a few days ago. Danny dragged his feet behind him as he stared out of the window and towards his house. His parents were still out, talking with the police officer. And he glanced back at his phone, his head suddenly feeling lightheaded and his steps feeling lost.He dialed his number. “Roy,” he sputtered out. Not even a hello or a how are you going. He heard him groan on the other side, like he was rubbing his eyes and slowly getting up.“W-Who is this?” he mumbled, yawning.“It’s Danny,”“D-Danny?!” he heard him hastily sit up and gain consciousness. “I’m so glad you finally picked up. I-I have to tell you something.”“No, I need to tell you something,” he said firmly, on the verge of shouting. “Where are you?! Police cars are all over the street and your parents are crying.”Roy stopped for a moment.“...I didn't want to make a big deal out of this...” he muttered. “I honestly didn't…”“What the fuck are you talking about?” Danny continued to peer out the window. “Tell me where you are. Now.”“...the city…” he reluctantly explained. Danny gasped.“Why? H-How did you even get there? It takes like five hours!”“I drove there a couple of days ago...at the middle of the night…” he sighed. “I stopped thinking. I just knew where I wanted to go...and I went.”“Are you stupid?! You can’t live out there forever! You’re gonna have to come back eventually and face everything you know?” worry pooled in his stomach, and he contemplated whether he wanted to go all the way to the city just to see him or not. “I know…” he whispered. “Of course I know that. I just...needed to get away for a bit.”“Why? This is stupid. You’re going to hurt yourself, and get yourself in trouble and this is all for nothing!”“I needed to get your attention!”His scream made Danny freeze.“...what are you talking about?”“You ignored me for weeks Danny! I felt alone, I didn’t know where to go...and I guess I just figured that I needed to get out…” his voice cracked. “And maybe this was risky enough to make you look over...even for a moment…”“R-Roy…” he mumbled. “I never stopped caring about you. I don’t know why you thought that…”“Because you blocked me and refused to even look at me,”“I know…” he regretted it immediately, looking back on the countless moments he could have done something. “...I’m sorry. I didn’t...I just thought that-”“I know I get it. I got where you were coming from, and Courtney and-” he heard him slap himself across the face. “I’m stupid. I know. But I just feel so claustrophobic there. I just needed to get out and get fresh air. For real this time.”“I understand that Roy, but why did you have to run away like that? You left everyone so confused,” he said worriedly.“I don’t know what I’m doing,” he confessed heavily. “I act like I know everything, and I know how to fix everything. B-Because everyone says I know shit but I don’t. I don't know what I’m doing and I don't know how to handle all of this shit.”“None of us know what we’re doing and we don't need to all the time,” Danny explained, his voice soft. “That's life. And you're not expected to hold all the answers of the world either Roy. It’s okay,” he sighed. “I guess I’m just here to say...I’m worried about you. I want you to come back home. And I really love you.”“...but I don't want to come back...I just can’t,”“I know you feel like you can't. But this is just for your safety Roy. I’m scared,” he pleaded. “Come home. Please.”“I…” he shook his head. “I might come back tomorrow...day after? I don’t know at this point…”“Well, it’s spring break. You have time but, I guess I’m just here to ask you to come back as soon as possible. So you’re okay,” he watched the police part from their houses. “...unless…”“Unless what?”“...it’s spring break,”“And?”“I’ll meet you. In between,”“W-What?”“Let’s go to the beach. It’s near the city,” he hastily thought up a plan, his mind racing.“T-The one near the bridge? How are you gonna?”“I’ll go with Courtney,”“Court hates me,”“She won’t anymore. Trust me. J-Just sit tight, we’ll see each other soon. It’s going to all be alright…”“I trust you Danny. Full heartedly,” Roy swallowed. “I love you.”“I love you too.”The phone beeped by his ear. He slowly lowered it to his side, until his arm gave out and it dangled down. And he felt lost and broken. He watched the sirens completely fade away in the distance.
“I don’t know what you’re doing anymore Danny…”
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
“Mom...I’m sorry,” Danny sniffed.He couldn't help but to just be embraced in her arms and sit on the sofa with her. It was the only way to feel completely safe. She had steamed up a pot of earl grey, his personal favourite, and she positioned him under her arm comfortably on the couch.“You’re such a troublemaker,” she chuckled. “You’ve always been so drawn to danger. I don’t get it.”“I’m not even trying,” he sipped the warm tea. “...I don’t know what to do anymore…”“Teenage years are hard. Trust me. We all have to go through it,” she sighed. “I guess everyone handles it in different ways. But trust me, everyone feels giving up sometimes. Because things are hard. And sometimes people just want to run away for a while because things are too hard. It’s normal to feel like things are too heavy and you want to dump the load somewhere for a while. But I guess what makes us really adults is when we learn to deal with it. Slowly but surely, carry the load to the end.”“I don’t think Roy wants to deal with it...and I don't know if I want to deal with it either…” he pursed his lips. “Are you talking about your sexuality?” she didn't need an answer. “I understand. Well, that’s a whole nother story. I’m going to be honest here, this town...probably isn't the best. For anyone who’s not “conventional”.”“I know…” “But there’s a whole world out there that's going to love you. Nearly as much as I love you,” she explained brightly, running her hand through his hair. “Trust me.”“So you're saying…?”“You should move out? Well, not straight away. I wouldn’t want you to move out too soon, but I know you will eventually. And when you do, I want you to find somewhere that’ll accept you. Because that’s how you truly learn to accept yourself,” she grinned. “And I think that’s what Roy needs. You know what his parents are like. They can be a little overbearing.”“A little?” he snickered. “Okay, very. Either way, I guess I’m just saying...chase your dreams. Go out and achieve the things you want to achieve because there isn't much holding you back. You only live once and you don’t want to be kept back by all those worries you have right now,” she gazed down at him with a sincere smile. “Life never gets easier, sadly, but if you have more fun along the way, it makes the whole thing much more worthwhile.”“...thanks mom,” Danny tucked himself back into the embrace a little more. “I needed to hear that.”“I know you did,” she shrugged off. “Everyone needs to hear it sometimes. And I’m guessing you’re going to go out and tell Roy that, right?”“...yeah…” he reluctantly admitted. “...I shouldn't though, should I?”“Courtney’s coming with you?” he nodded at the answer. “Then I trust you.”“Wait what?”“She’s responsible. And I trust her to make sure that you’re not in any trouble,” she chuckled. “I don’t know what’s been happening with your friends, but you suddenly came back with a whole new haircut and a new attitude and I don’t know what to think,” she joked. "So right now I need that motherly guidance that Courtney has just to reassure me that everything is fine."“Yeah…” he played with his locks. “Sorry about that.”“Nothing to be sorry about. I like it a lot actually. You can see your face now,” she widened her smile. “Who cut it for you?”“B-Brian. Brian Firkus. He’s a-”“Oh, he’s the boy who played guitar at an assembly that one time,” she reminisced. “I specifically remember him playing a country song.”“Yeah...that’s him,” he nodded. “I didn’t know he was a great hairstylist,” she laughed. “You’re friends are so interesting Danny.”“Yep, they are,” he chuckled.“Do they know about you and Roy?”“I mean Max might but,” he stopped. “Wait what?”“What? It’s obviously that it's not a platonic relationship dear,” Danny instantly flushed.“W-What is that even supposed to mean?!”“You’re not just friends, right? You can't be. Especially nowadays. You talk about him a lot,”“Do I?”“Oh, that's cute dear,” she gently patted him on the back. “Well, I’m off to bed now.”"Thanks mom."Danny finished off the last few sips of his tea as he leaned back. He wondered for a few moments. Just about everything, anything, nothing. And he felt a little more at peace with everything. He loved his mom. He definitely needed to hear that. And so did Roy.So he gathered his things, changed into a new set of clothes and set off.
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
“This is stupid Danny. I don’t understand it,” Courtney turned a sharp left, running her hands over the steering wheel. “But I trust that you’re doing the right thing.”“...thanks,” Danny exhaled. “I don’t fully know what I’m doing but...this feels right. This feels really right.”“And everything you told me about Roy. About the phone call and the texts…?”“They’re true, yeah,” he confirmed. “Surprising, I know.”“...I’m trusting you Danny. With all of this,” she shook her head. “I don’t know what the heck is going on with you and Roy, and why he’s still missing, but I do know that,” she pulled up at a red light. “I trust your judgement. I love you. And I want Roy back. I might hate him now but...at the end of the day, I love him too. And I want him to come back.”Danny smiled brightly and looked over to her. “I love you too,” he bit down on his lip. “Let’s go get Roy back.”They gripped onto each other's hands tightly for a moment as they drove off into the rising sun. They set off pretty early in the morning; something that Roy organised with them. Danny didn't care about anything else at this point. He just wanted to get there, and see him, and make sure that everything was okay. “Hey, can you pull out the directions?” she asked, her eyes on the road.“Uhh yeah, sure,” he pulled out his phone. “I think I screen shotted the directions actually…”“Good, because the service cuts off around here.”He began to scroll through his photo album, trying to find the directions until he stopped. And he stared. And he instantly felt his heart crack.
ROY: I have your back
They were the texts they exchanged nearly a year ago. A really long time ago. It was from the very first time Danny hung out with the boys. After the whole Brad incident…
ROY: I’ll go to bed when you do
ROY: you need a rest too
And now they were here. So many things had happened. And it felt so surreal. He read over the words, wishing that he was having a rest. It was weird knowing that Roy was asking him to sleep at the time, and there he was, knowing that Roy wasn’t properly rested either. Everyone needed a break, and he wondered why it took him this long to realise that he was pushing himself too hard. “Danny?” Courtney perked. “Directions? I mean, I don’t need them right now, but-”“Court,” he cut her off. “...I’m sorry about what Roy said.”“Huh? I mean, it wasn't even you so-”“I know, I know but,” he teared up a little just thinking about it. “I don't think Roy meant to hurt you in any way. I know because…” he vividly saw the annual ball night, and all those other nights they spent together. Just talking. And what it was like to know Roy. “He really cares about you Courtney. He would never want to hurt you. I know he has weird issues, but I think he just needs time to think over everything that’s going on. In life in general.”Courtney sighed deeply.“I know...” she pursed her lips. “I know he pushes himself too hard and I know he’s tired. I get it. I suspected it. But what he said…” she shrugged. “I guess I’m going to find out how he really feels when we talk to him. I’m going to talk to him about it properly, listen this time, and hopefully get an answer.”Danny grinned.“I don’t believe in fate, but I do believe that we were all destined to be friends,” Courtney chuckled at the comment. “And I know this is going to end really well.”“Well we’ve started together,” she ran her finger down the back of Danny’s hand. “And we’re gonna end together.”The rest of the trip seemed to pass fairly quickly. It was probably because it was still pretty dark, even with the small peaks of the sun. But maybe it was because they were singing the whole way there, like they used to when they listened to the radio. Yeah, Danny wasn’t the biggest fan of pop music, but he did kind of have a guilty pleasure for them now. They sang for hours, from upbeat songs to power ballads, and Danny couldn't stop laughing through all of them. It felt perfect for him. Just listening along to songs and singing duets like they’ve been rehearsed. He was an absolute sucker for harmonies. And he definitely missed Courtney’s soprano voice on top of his alto. It just worked so well together that it made him excited and thrilled. He missed it, a lot more than he actually realised.It was still somewhat early in the morning when they arrived by the bayside. Courtney gazed over at the sand and the sea like it was vaguely nostalgic, her eyes slightly squinted. Danny stared over at the glistening water with awe. It really was beautiful here.
“Danny? Courtney?”
He could recognise that voice absolutely anywhere. Of course he could. It was the voice he was waiting to hear. He immediately turned his head around, his ears ringing with an overwhelming sense of excitement.
“Roy!”
He dashed towards him, arms wide, as he hugged him tightly into his embrace. He felt at home. More than he imagined. He felt Roy breathe through is locks, a long deep sigh. His warm breath intertwined with his locks as he rested his hands around his waist.“Oh my god Danny! I can’t believe it’s you,” he exhaled, his chin pressing against the younger boy’s shoulder. “I-I missed you so much.”“I missed you too,” he parted from the embrace to lunge over to him, pressing their lips together. He felt his body tremble for a second from how surreal it felt. “H-Hey Roy,” Courtney waved over, using the other hand to brush through her long locks. “...cute moment.”She cleared her throat awkwardly, not knowing what to say. “Sarcasm doesn't suit you,” Danny chuckled over, parting so she could join the small social bubble. Courtney snickered.“I’m kidding,” she crossed her arms and strolled over to them. “You guys are cute,” she exchanged looks with Danny for a moment, the younger boy eyeing her a little firmly. “...like Willam and I.”“Goddamnit Court,” Danny accidentally let out. “No, no she has the right to say that,” Roy dismissed his worry. “I’m sorry. I genuinely really sorry about what I said. It was...honestly stupid. I don’t really know why I said it, and what I was going on about…” he sighed. “I think I act like I know more shit than I actually do. Let’s be honest,” it made the blonde girl chuckle a little. “And I’m sorry for degrading you guys,” he reeled Danny a little closer. “And I realised how incredibly stupid it was, when I realised how much I cared about Danny.”The younger boy instantly blushed at the comment, coughing and smiling widely like a dork. Courtney rolled her eyes.“Very cute,” she commented with a smirk. “And yeah, I accept your apology. I mean, I kind of have to when you love Danny that much, right?” she brought her jacket over her shoulder. Her cheerleading uniform. “Can I be honest though? That apology wasn’t good enough so…”“Court,” Roy giggled at her over dramatic gestures. “Jesus, okay, you get my blessing to be with Will…? Is that what you want? I’m happy for you two. Is it revolutionary? Not exactly. You’re both hot cheerleaders. We’ve already seen that storyline before,” Courtney bursted out into laughter. “But she seems nice. Now. And I hope everything works out for you in the future,” Courtney widened her eyes a tad at the comment. “Yeah I said future. That big thing that’s happening soon. Don't forget that this fantasy isn’t going to last forever.”“Don’t remind me,” she rolled her eyes, going in for a quick hug with Roy herself. She grinned. “I don’t want it to be over yet.”They somehow spent the whole day talking about it. Or almost the whole day. They checked in by a nearby motel, nowhere near the standard they were used to, but good enough for all of them to be fairly satisfied. And they went out to a bayside cafe, sipping on warm drinks as they watched people arrive by the beach. Danny liked watching them. It was calming and blissful. “No one’s truly ready for the future Court,” Roy reminded, finely brewed coffee by his lips. “But we might as well have fun along the way, and fun as we grow up,” he took a sip. “Do you know what you want to do after you graduate?”“Umm...kind of,” she shrugged. “Not really. You?”“Barely,” he admitted. “But I’m having fun trying to figure it out. What about you Danny?”“...I don’t know, I guess,” he bit down on his lip. “It’s too complicated. All I know is that I don't want to be at school, so I’m probably dropping out early.”“I’m excited to see you leave school,” Courtney commented with an amused smile. “You’d be so much better off without it.”“I know,” he sipped on his cup of tea. “I’m just not cut out for school, and why should I stay if I get nothing out of it, right?”“Right,” Roy nodded over. “I just want you to be happy.”“Ha gay,” Courtney slurred jokingly, making Roy snap over to her with a glaring look. That usual one. “What? I’m right, aren't I?”“Yeah,” Roy coughed. “Sure.”Danny giggled into his cup. He slowly watched Courtney warm up to Roy over time, letting go of the previous baggage so she could laugh along with his sarcastic jokes. They went back to the motel room that night, all three of them, and everything felt like tingly nostalgia. He watched Courtney tie up her hair, looking like her nine year old self, her grin wide and her cheeks rosy with laughter. Roy never stopped spilling out jokes, like he always used to as a child, sipping on a can of cola as he gestured for Danny to sit down next to him.And then there was Danny. Feeling like a little kid, his smile wide and cheesy and his giggles higher pitched, as he swung his legs excitedly and joined along with their stupid debate over whether vegan cheese was actually good or not. And he smiled. He couldn't really believe how far they had become as friends. And how the future was so uncertain. It was an exciting thought for Danny, actually. He didn't think it would be. But it really is.And he lay back on his bed, his head resting against the pillow, and felt Roy curl an arm around him."Hey," he whispered over, his voice quiet. "I'm glad you came.""I'm glad I did too."
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
“Then we sang all the way home!” Courtney laughed. “And Roy refused to sing for, like, hours, but he finally did and then,” she sighed happily. “It was hilarious. It was so much fun.”Willam grinned towards her, her fingers combing through her long, blonde locks. They were positioned by Courtney’s bed, with the head cheerleader right by her feet so Willam could play with her hair. “I’m glad you had fun,” she said, amused. “I think the best thing is how Roy’s parents reacted. They weren’t really that upset actually,” she reminisced. “They were just really happy to see him.”“Well that’s good,” Willam sincerely stroked her hair. “I’m guessing you had a lot of time to talk to him?”“Yeah, we talked about a lot of things,” for a moment, she looked back on what they talked about. Most notably, about the future. All the things that were going to happen, might happen and will never happen. The endless possibilities. “Hey Will…”“Yeah?” she peered down at her, lowering her hands to her lap. “What do you want to do when we graduate?” Willam groaned a little at the answer.“Mmm, maybe do a uni course. Like something to do with fashion or designing,” she shrugged. “I’m thinking of going to a university out of town. Since this place is kind of shitty. What about you?”“Maybe...something to do with musical theatre? I’m kind of into that. I always have been,” she explained with uncertainty. “But one of the only musical universities I’ve seen around are situated pretty far away so...I don’t really know.”“That sucks,” she commented, her voice only having a hint of sadness.“Are you gonna miss me?” she teased.“No,” she lied, chuckling. “Why would I?”“Very funny Will,” she rolled her eyes. “You know that…” she sighed. “You know that this will have to stop, right? This isn’t going to last, in the future...if we don’t talk about it now.”“But maybe I don’t want to think about it now,” she brushed off. “Why not?”“Because I have better things to focus on,” Courtney scoffed at the answer, taking full offence to it. “I-I mean, I think things will work out on their own. We don’t need to stress out about it.”“This is potentially dangerous Will. What do you mean ‘we don’t need to stress about it’?”“It’s not that I see no future but-”Courtney halted, her bottom lip quivering for a moment before she swallowed.“Wait, n-no I’m saying that…” the other blonde tried to reassure. “I don't know what the future is...I don’t want to think about it.”“So no planning?” Courtney’s words cracked for a moment. “Nothing is going to happen if we just avoid it,” she spat. “Will, I want to be with you. And I want to be happy with you...I’m just worried...”“Court, I’ve virtually been with you for years now,” she positioned herself right next to her. “I don't want to think that we've been together for a few months because we’ve basically been together from the moment we met. Right?”“You hated me when we met,”“I thought you were threatening. There's a difference,” she joked. “I didn’t want another hot blonde coming in.”“And now you've learnt to appreciate me more now?” she warmed up to her a little more, allowing her to sneak in a joking comment.“Let’s say I learnt more about you. Which made me realise how lovable you are,” she smooth talked, Courtney giggling at it. “Fine,” she sighed. “...but can we please talk about the future. Please? It’s making me a little nervous, to be honest.”“Okay,” she groaned a little as she shuffled a little closer to her. “So you want to do musical theatre, right?”“Right,”“Well, from my knowledge, the closest one is, like, near the city. Well, in that direction. Since that’s virtually the only way to escape this stupid town,” Willam rolled her eyes. “Unless we go East and we’ll somehow end up in a more conservative town.”“Yeah, I wouldn't want that,” Courtney chuckled.“And since I want to do fashion, the city is a great place,” “So you’re saying…?”“We should probably escape here. Together,” Willam said it so oddly nonchalantly that it made Courtney a little confused.“B-But that’s like, risky, and stuff. We have to basically ditch this town,” she said, her voice pitched.“I don’t know about your parents, but mine will be fine with the fact that I’m getting an education,” she chuckled. “I don’t think they really care about anything else. They think I’m some washed up blonde.”“You’re 17,”“Still washed up,”“Well,” she gulped. “I mean, I’d like that but,” she shook her head. “I don’t know if my parents would be okay with it. I think they want me to go to a community college at most around here, find a boy, get married.”“Right, they’re...really white,” she coughed. “Forgot that for a second.”Courtney rolled her eyes.“So there’s that,”“But maybe you should tell them. Might as well give it a try, right?” Willam encouraged.“You know what? You’re right,” she nodded. “Maybe I should tell them that I want to study in uni.”“Atta’ girl,” she smiled, pecking her cheek. “Look at you, stepping it up.”“Well you know me,” she cocked a shoulder playfully. “When are you gonna tell them?”“I don’t know yet,” she shrugged. “I guess I would want to talk about it with Danny and Roy first.”“Of course,” Willam smiled. “You always go to them.”“What?” she questioned. “We’re best friends,” she paused. “Are you jealous?”“What? No,” she denied quickly. Courtney bursted out into laughter.“That’s so cute!”“Don’t patronise me,”“What? It is!” she gushed. “Who knew?”“You’re a bitch,”“A lovable one?”“A hateable one,” she quickly fell for a fit of laughter as she brought an arm around her shoulder and brought her in closely to her chest. As she leaned in slowly, her phone suddenly buzzed in her pocket, making their heads dart over. “Uh, sorry.”She dug her hand in to grab her device.
ALASKA: do you wanna go to the diner tonight?
Willam raised an eyebrow and showed it over to Courtney.“The diner? Um, no thanks. The football guys are always there,” she replied.
WILLAM: why do you want to go?
“I swear to god if she says for Sharon I-”
ALASKA: Sharon’s performing there
Willam instantly slapped herself across the face.
WILLAM: and you want us to come because…?
ALASKA: I need support
The two blondes stared over at each other for consultation.“I’m down,” Courtney shrugged. Willam groaned.
WILLAM: fine
ALASKA: thank god
ALASKA: thanks so much
ALASKA: meet at 6?
WILLAM: we’ll be there
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
DANNY: hey
DANNY: do you wanna hang out?
The young boy spent virtually the whole day just rolling around in his room doing nothing. Maybe spending a few hours on assignments that he forgot to do - something that Max had been nudging him on to do more often - but nothing, really.
ROY: can’t
ROY: stupid church stuff
Danny liked to just shut that thought away at the back of his mind; the fact that Roy had to be sent to “counselling” now. Because his parents think there’s something wrong with him. And well, in some ways...yes? Danny does want him to go to counselling because something was obviously disturbing him and the younger boy wanted to get him some help. But what his parents dubbed as “counselling” was at church, which wasn’t exactly what Danny had in mind. And he knew that being in a place like that wasn’t going to make Roy all that happy.
ROY: sorry
DANNY: It’s okay
He groaned into his sheets, immediately getting up to do something. His eyes darted around the room to find something remotely interesting.Broken lamp; he forgot that he never had it fixed. Rubbish bin; filled with all his screwed up pieces of paper of useless notes from school. Half empty water bottle; from this morning. He sighed.Half eaten chocolate bar; the one that Court took a single block of because she craved dark chocolate so badly. A stuffed toy; that Roy got for him on their small “trip” because he realised that Danny was eyeing a small teddy bear in the window of a corner store. And a notebook.He walked over to it, taking it into his hands. His song book. He hadn't touched it in years. He flipped through the pages, looking back at the messy scribbles which often turned into melodic songs by the end of the process. His guitar sat by the corner of his room, right next to the book, resting against his desk.
Mood rings never worked on me
They were never purple or greenAqua, orchid, teal, or pink
His mind rushed back to that “mood ring” incident. The ring that was still sitting by his desk, now dusty and old.
A dark horse a double minority
Children always love to tease
Get your tickets here it’s free
He gulped at the thought. His old thoughts. The ones that hadn’t risen up in years.
And all the kids sing along
“It’s the sad boy
The no dad boy
Just a bad boy
His voice hitched.
Picking flowers during baseball
It’s the fag boy
Always mad boy
Just a sad boy”
The notebook fell from his grasp, collapsing onto the top of his desk. His hands trembled for a moment. He kind of forgot that he used to be feel like this. He used to write these thoughts down, at quite a young age too, because he felt like this. Because he felt like he had nothing else he could do to cope.
Soaked laying on the windowpane
Couldn’t tell momma the shame
I can’t tell my mom my pain
His vision instantly became hazier. Like the weight of the world was back to haunt his thoughts. He remembered exactly what it felt like to feel hopeless. And to feel like he was going nowhere. To feel like he had no one to turn to but himself, his guitar and his music.
His eyes teared up slightly as he imagined himself, little Danny, crying into his desk, his fingers trembling as they wrapped themselves around the slim pencil.
He wasn’t going back there. Ever. He wasn’t ever going to be that unhappy again. He will never allow himself to get to that dark place.
His phone buzzed suddenly, startling him. The feeling of darkness seemed to seep away as he snapped back into reality and lunged over to his phone.
SHARON: hey Danny
This was probably the last person he was expecting to text him.
SHARON: I’m playing at the diner tonight
SHARON: it would be pretty cool if you came to watch
Danny smiled.
DANNY: sure
DANNY: I’ll bring my friends along too
SHARON: cool shit
Finally, he had something to do now. He grinned as he clicked into the group chat and texted his friends to meet at the diner.
He took a seat by his desk, his hands running down the old paper.
JASON: fuck no
Danny rolled his eyes.
DANNY: why not?
JASON: one word
JASON: Brad
MAX: that’s a name actually
Danny snickered.
KURTIS: I’ll come
KURTIS: I like Sharon
MAX: same
MATT: come on babe
MATT: I don't like the jocks either
MATT: but if everyone wants to go…
JASON: fine
JASON: whatever
Danny rejoiced as he put on a jacket and headed out. He was excited to finally do something, and to get the thought of his song out of his head.
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
“Wow, you’re dressed nicely,” Sharon slurred jokingly, resting her elbow by the bar. Her guitar case slung over her shoulder and it rested on her back. She was wearing her typical “rock star” attire that outed her out of the closet the moment you looked at her. But Alaska liked that. In a weird way. “Thanks,” she flushed slightly. She didn’t really think her outfit was all that great. Maybe nicer than usual though. Her skirt was maybe a little too short and she was wearing the jacket that Sharon left at her house the other day just to remind her that they were together, but you know. She was wearing her usual clothing. “I like that jacket,” she joked. “I’ve never seen it before.”“Well, yeah,” she brushed it off. “It’s one of a kind,” she chuckled. “Anyways, are you ready to perform?”“I’m really excited actually. Not nervous at all,” she waved down an employee. “Can we get two diet cokes?”“Yeah, you do seem pretty laid back today,” the other girl commented. “And thanks knowing my order.”“You have always liked diet cokes more than actual cokes for some reason,” Sharon smiled. “It’s so odd.”“Maybe I’m just unique,”“You sure are,” they clinked their served drinks. “Wish me luck.”“Good luck.”By then, Danny had just walked in with his friends, already feeling out of place the moment they had. They’d come here before as a group, but it honestly still felt fairly alien to them.They took a seat by a booth near the far end of the room. One of the closest to the stage. It was the one they previously sat at, but Danny just liked the fact that all the tension of last time was nonexistent this time. “We’ll all have cokes please,” Max ordered, like he usually did. “I’m so ready for Sharon to perform,” Danny enthused. “I’m excited too,” Kurtis chimed in. “She was great in the musical right?”“Too soon,” Max joined in. “But yes, yes she was.”“Do you know what she’s performing?” Jason instantly lunged over to the glasses of coke being placed down onto the table. “I’m guessing something that’s alternative rock,” the youngest boy shrugged. “I don’t know.”“Well, to Sharon?” Matt raised his glass of coke. “To Sharon,” they all took a large gulp of their drink.Danny somehow forgot how much he loved Sharon’s voice. He used to work with her a lot, when the musical was a thing, but hearing her sing by herself on a stage with just a guitar was definitely more amazing than he imagined. She had a deep alto voice that not only suited his, which made them such an amazing duo, but the alternative rock style as well. He gazed at the site.He was the one who gave the biggest applause when she finished.“Thanks,” she spoke through the mic, lowering the guitar onto her lap. “I’m honestly really glad to be here.”Danny loved watching her glow on stage. It must’ve been around 30 minutes in by then, and so he expected her to be wrapping up soon. Everyone was intrigued by her. Not just her presence on stage, but just her persona. Everyone at that school knew that she kind of had a reputation. Not a particularly good one. She was always known to be kind of alternative. Different. Unique. And so no one really expected her to be some great singer.And Danny just figured that everyone was interested in her as a person now. And she was a person that no one really gave a damn about except Alaska for a while.“If you know me, well, you probably don’t know me,” she snickered. “It’s weird. I’m a nobody. But a somebody when they need someone to blame,” she rolled her eyes. “I’m the alternative, emo kid that’s just cringy enough to get some attention,” Danny chuckled a little at the comment, but no one else seemed to find it too funny. “Well, I guess I’m just standing up here to say,” she cleared her throat. “ ‘I exist. And I’m not just some rebel wannabe. I’m an actual person, and you should probably just stop stereotyping me. Because it’s getting boring. Maybe even for you’,” she laughed at her own words. “Anyway, before I wrap up completely and just brush off my 15 minutes of fame, I want to call someone up,” she looked directly towards Danny, and he immediately froze. “Danny Noriega. He was in the musical with me, and we were both the leads until it canceled so,” she pulled up another chair and pointed at it directly. “If you wouldn't mind coming up.”Max instantly pushed him forward so the younger boy would stumble to his feet. His eyes met with Courtney's who then held her breath from surprise and excitement.He gulped.And walked over to her. A little slowly to regain his usual state of mind.As he sat down on stage, the audience suddenly looked so much bigger. He could see absolutely everyone in that room, and they were looking directly at him. He gulped again. “Hey Danny,” She teasingly slurred. “Now, we have two options here. We can either sing 'Dead Girl Walking', you know, since that’s what we used to perform a lot. Maybe Seventeen or…” she smirked and Danny squirmed in his seat. “We could sing one your original songs.”The crowd began to cheer, and it was oddly encouraging yet nerve wracking. “Now, I don’t know about you, but I wanna hear you sing an original,” Sharon teased, adjusting the microphone to Danny’s lips. “Just give me a chord progression and I'll play it.”“Umm, I don't have an original song I’ve completed recently,” Danny whispered over nervously. “I only have like a maybe half completed one.”“Wing it,” she shrugged all too casually for Danny to feel safe. He cleared his throat and stared back at the crowd.His mind went through the possible choices. He could do the one he was working on most recently, which was the one he saw before he left. But he could barely figure out the chords, let alone the lyrics and melody. And some of his lyrics...well, were maybe too depressing for his liking. So he shoved that one aside. I Adore You. It’s an old one, but a good one. Courtney’s the only one who had ever heard it, mostly because it was based off of his drag persona, but he never had the heart to perform it again. But it seemed like the only good choice right now. He groaned at his own procrastination for writing music.“Okay, thought of something,” he sighed. “The chord progression is E to G# minor.”“Only two chords?” she strummed her guitar lightly. “Yeah,” he shrugged. “I wrote this ages ago, okay? Don’t judge me.”Danny Noriega. He never knew that he would be here. Singing in front of people. An original song too. It was amazing. He gulped. And mustered up the courage to sing his first words.
This is how it ends, never meant to hurt you.
It kind of reminded him of Adore. Her. Like she was talking to him. His eyes gazed over at Courtney, and she nodded over to him confidently.
I’m a pretty mess and I don’t deserve you.
He felt bad. For himself? A little. It didn't make too much sense, but in a way, it made a lot of sense. It was like Adore was apologising for everything that happened to Danny.
I ran out of time and second chances.
His eyes glanced over to his friends, ones that were staring back up at him in awe. They were silently rejoicing and cheering him on. He suddenly felt so much more confident.
Sorry couldn't build your white picket fences.
It was odd sensation to see people listen. Listen properly to you for the first time. Because this is Danny Noriega. No one cared about him. No one liked to listen to him talk and some didn't even bother to know his name. But here he was, sitting up on stage at the most popular hang out in town, singing an original song, that he composed himself. About, well, himself? That was a complex story he wouldn't want to touch on. Identity was the last complex thing he wanted to think about.
And every time I see you, it’s like all I am is see through
He seemed to zone out throughout his song. Like he was dissolving into the song. It made his body tingle satisfyingly as he sang along. If only Roy was here to see him.
‘Cause I adore you
The final line trembled by his tongue before he gave one last sigh. The crowd went wild. They cheered, whistled and called his name endlessly. Danny’s cheeks burnt up as he laughed into his palm.Sharon patted him on the back reassuringly as she excused herself from the stage and wrapped up the show, once and for all.But Danny was way too caught up in that one moment to pay attention to anything else that was happening. His feet felt light when he pushed down on them. He felt airy. Like the world was lifting him up as he walked. He was floating. “Danny,” Max laughed. “That was exceptional.”“Honestly that was so good,” their little group gave him another round of applause, making him blush to unbelieveable shades of red.“T-Thanks,” he piped out awkwardly, trying to hide his embarrassed face. “It was so embarrassing…”“But the song was so good!” Kurtis encouraged excitingly. “Honestly, you need to become a singer,” Jason smiled. “Let’s celebrate,” the ex-footballer swiftly shoved over his glass of coke and raised his own into the air. “To Danny and his amazing performance.”“To Danny!”
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
“Hey Matt,”
They were having an amazing night. Chatting about school and shit. Danny was still on his high from his performance and he felt absolutely amazing from it. He was half way through his second glass of coke and finishing off his meal when they came. Those guys.Matt wiped his lips with a napkin and glared up at them.“Hey,” he sarcastically drew out, trying to shut down the conversation as quickly as possible.“Long time no see,” Brad. Danny’s skin itched whenever he heard his voice. “We’re in the same timber construction class,” he clarified, his eye contact missing him. "We saw each other, like, last week."“I just wanted to ask something really quickly,” Dan came to his side, looking just as confident in his football jersey. “Why’d you leave the team Matt? Just before our big game?”“Because I hate football,” he replied coldly. “I was thinking of dropping out earlier, to be honest,” he shook his head. “Why are you even asking now? You had your last game ages ago.”“Because it got me thinking…” Brad began, his voice having a hint of excitement. Devious excitement. “Matt we didn't want to say it,” Dan’s voice was a tad nicer, but still too intense for the boys to feel comfortable. “But we think there was another reason.”“What is that supposed to mean?” he argued. “I left because I hated the sport, I hated the team and I need more time to study,” that was a lie. “Why’s that such a big problem?”“Because you left before the final game,” Dan complained. “Well if you were that good, you could have managed to win without me,” he let himself ease into a small smirk. “And it’s just a stupid football game.”“But it’s the final game for us. Ever,” he slammed his fist onto the table. “Not if you actually went through to the finals,” Matt began to notice people slowly starting to turn around to watch this unfold. He gulped. People whispering always marked the beginning of a downfall. “Look, I’m sorry for leaving,” he apologised somewhat harshly. “It was bad timing, but you guys were complete dickheads to Jason and that annual ball incident was the final straw. You’ve never treated him right, but this was way too far. Even for fucking cum-rags like you.”He drew out a victory in his eyes, so that was enough for him. He couldn't be bothered to fight anymore. So he zipped his lips and slurped a few gulps of his coke. “Oh…” Brad laughs. “Jason? It’s about Jason?”Matt froze. He felt his boyfriend stiffen next to him.“Y-Yeah,” his voice was now breaking with the pressure. The air was getting thicker. “He’s my friend,” it broke his own heart to say it. “Why’s it a problem to back up my friend?”“Are you a faggot?” Brad suddenly spat. Matt’s heart stopped. And everyone on the table, no, the room, went completely silent. Everything completely cemented itself into utter shock. And Matt felt like all the colours of his skin drained out of his body. He went pale. Numb. And he felt like his literal pulse. Stopped. Dead in its tracks. He couldn't believe what just got uttered out of the asshole’s lips.Brad’s snicker brought everything back to reality. A reality that was much denser and darker than the one Matt previously knew.“Okay Brad, just lay off,” Danny had to be the one to cut in. For the first time in his life, he just stood up to Brad. And the footballer wasn't taking it. But Danny didn't feel like he had another choice. No one was standing up for Matt (who seemed like he just lost all blood in his body) and he couldn't just leave him like that. “Oh wow,” the older boy drew out with an overly sarcastic tone. Danny gulped. “Some other faggot’s trying to stand up as well now, huh?” he chuckled. “This should be really funny.”“That’s enough,” even Dan stepped in, his voice a little wary. “We should just leave them alone Brad…”“But this is way too funny,” he laughed.Matt was still in a frozen state of shock. One that left his fingers tingling. It was the only thing he could feel in his body. Jason wanted to grip onto him ever so tightly, and absolute kick the shit out of Brad and maybe even Dan, but he knew he couldn't ever win to that. No matter how much he desperately wanted to. And he was really desperate to.“Just leave while you can,” Kurtis muttered, almost under his breath. Brad raised an eyebrow.“What’d you say?” his glare made the brunette coward away. “Matt hasn't denied it though, has he?” the ex-footballer tried to swallow, but his dry throat didn't allow him to. “Oh shit. This is too good. What a plot twist.”“Brad!” Matt choked out, tears starting to form beneath his eyes. Fuck. This was too much for him. “Stop it. Okay. J-Just fucking leave right now.”“Yeah come on,” Dan pinched his jacket and harshly yanked him aside, giving Matt a small and subtle apologetic look as he parted ways with the group.All five of them sat in silence. Matt needed to throw up. He immediately dashed outside, leaving the group complete and utterly shocked with what happened as he ran towards his car and locked himself inside.As Jason tried to chase after him, Kurtis stopped him, gathering the fabric of his shirt to keep him back.“I don't know if you should,” the brunette said, eyeing Matt who now had tears rolling down his cheeks as he started up his car. “It’ll look bad if you leave now.”“I don’t care!” he cried weakly, squirming under the pressure. “I need to know if he's okay.”“He's not okay,” Max answered, speaking up for the first time. And his voice seemed to be worn out. “And there's no point. Trust me. Brad’s going to treat you even worse if you do something now.”“Matt’s already outed, I don’t know what’s going to happen to you,” Kurtis tried to warn him. “Or us. I don't think we should do anything right now.”Jason swallowed harshly, trying to gulp up all of the tears building up in his chest. He was overwhelmed, like everything he dreaded happening just basically happened. Right then in front of him. He hated it. He wished they could go back in time and said something different. Did something different. Just something. He was praying mentally, but he knew he couldn't do anything about it. He sniffed and sat back in his chair, the air between them feeling cool. No one said a single word for the rest of the day.
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
“Why the fuck would you do that?!”
Even Dan was upset with Brad. Frustrated was probably a better word for it. “What?” he let out a snicker. “It wasn't even that bad. It was kind of funny, actually.”“You’re a mother fucking douchebag,” Willam chimed in, shoving aside her empty glass of coke. “Really Brad? You’re really going to fucking do that?”“Why do you care?” he chortled. “You’re just some slut that-”“Shut the fuck up Brad!” Courtney fought. “You did something shitty. Own up to it. Apologise for goodness sake.”“Why should I? He’s a faggot. God hates faggots. We hate faggots,”“We fucking hate people like you, you asshole,” Alaska snorted back, leaning up against her chair. “Matt’s a nice guy. I don't understand why you were such a dickhead about it.”“But he’s a fag!”“We don’t even know if that’s true,” Dan tried to defend. “Why can't we just leave him alone?” he slumped down by an empty spot. “I’m fucking mad that he left the team before the final game but dude, we can’t just be mad at that for the rest of the year. We’re seniors. There’s no fucking point.”“Gees, I’m sorry,” he rolled his eyes. “I don't understand that it made all of you so upset,” he chuckled forcefully. “Seriously. Were you even friends with him?”“Who cares? You were still being a dick,” Courtney turned herself around to face her friends. She didn't really understand why they decided to get a booth right next to the footballers. It literally made no sense. Maybe it was because they were used to do that. You know, before her and Dan broke up.“I hate him,” Willam mouthed over to her as she sipped on Courtney’s leftover coke. The other blonde chuckled.“Same,” she rolled her eyes. “Remember that time you went out with him?”“Please don't remind me,” she drew out. “Anyways,” Alaska piped. “I might head off soon. I’m going home with Shar'.”“Is she taking you home or are you staying over?” Willam raised an eyebrow knowingly.“Well, it’s spring break so might as well stay over, right?” she shrugged, getting up and brushing down her skirt. “I’m gonna see if she’s ready to head out. What are you two gonna do?”“I don’t know actually,” Courtney peered over to her girlfriend. “My place is free tonight. Wanna come over?”“Love to,”“It’s settled then.”Courtney wondered how they got to this. And she also wondered if they were together too often sometimes, because it seemed like they were literally attached to each other nowadays. She didn’t care all too much though, and every thought seemed to fade away the moment Willam kissed her lips. Then her mind would just go blank.She moaned against her lips, feeling her kiss down her neck. She held her tightly in her embrace as she shifted her against the wall.“Will…” she mumbled out, exhaling. She knocked her head back. “Babe.”“Mmm...you’re so loud babe,” she giggled, breathing down on her collarbone. Her hands grip around her body harshly, Courtney gasping at it.
“Willma?!”
“Shit,” they flung apart, both frantically sweating and hyperventilating like maniacs. Courtney swore she could see her life flash before her eyes.Willam peered around the room to just make out the silhouette of her mom by the far corner, looking as if she just crawled out of bed.“I thought you were off tonight,” Willam struggled to piece together a confident sounding sentence.“We came back early because your dad wasn’t feeling well,” she wrapped her robe around her. “Are you serious Willma?”“Mom, my name is Willam. Remember?” she rolled her eyes at the reply, trying to stay as aloof as possible.Courtney remembered hearing that story for the first time. Apparently her real name was “Willma” but they misspelt it on her birth certificate, giving her an oddly masculine sounding name. The head cheerleader thought it was a lighthearted and somewhat funny tale. At first. Until she actually met her parents.They weren't rude by any means. Just...less privileged, in a sense. They weren't from the richest part of town, and they seemed to forget Willam a lot. She jokes that it’s because she’s a mistake and they never wanted her, but the more Courtney heard it from her mouth, the more she started figuring out that it’s not a joke and she's telling the truth. That Willam is trying to make a joke out of it to cope with it but she's actually pretty hurt about it.“And who’s this?” her mom asked.“Courtney,” she replied coldly. “She’s coming up to my room.”“I don't think so Willma,”“Why do you care anyway? And for the last time, it’s Willam. Willam,” “Please don't tell me that this is Courtney Act. Isn't she supposed to be your captain?”“Yes she is, now, let me go upstairs,” she grabbed her girlfriend by the hand and hurried up the staircase, actively avoiding whatever her mom was saying. At least she had the satisfaction to slam the shit out of her door and lock it. She sighed deeply before plotting down on her bed.“She’s going to get mad at you,” Courtney said quietly, not knowing why she really said it in the first place.“She's not going to bother coming up here to say anything about it though,” Willam chuckled painfully. “Trust me. She struggles to get upstairs.”“I don't think that's something you can joke about Will,” Courtney warned softly, knowing that her mom had genuine problems.“Yeah, but I’m allowed to joke about it. She's my own mom,” she rolled her eyes and slumped down onto her bed, resting her head against the pillow. There were a few moments of silence until Courtney curled up by her shoulder.“...sorry,” Willam was the first to speak up again. “I didn't want you to see that.”“It’s alright,” she reassured. “I honestly don't mind.”“But I mind,” she kissed her forehead lightly. “Trust me Court. We’re gonna make it out of here. We’re gonna escape, and be happy and leave this whole place behind us.”“Really? Do you really think so?”“Definitely,” she pressed her lips against hers swiftly. “I’ll make sure of it.”
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“He’s not picking up…”Jason’s hands trembled as he clutched onto his phone. He stared down at his own device and turned it on and off to see if he got a notification. It was making him anxious.“It’s going to be okay Jason,” Kurtis tried to reassure. They were both in Jason’s bedroom. It was just the two of them for the first time in forever. Kurtis decided to just invite himself over to make sure that Jason was okay. After the whole diner incident, none of them spoke a word to each other in person, mostly because they couldn't figure out what to say after it.They did talk to each other over text though. Or they tried to. Everyone spammed Matt endlessly, but he didn’t pick up his phone a single time. Then they tried to make sure that Jason was okay, but he didn’t have the heart to reply either.So Kurtis just decided to take matters into his own hands.“I-I can't get a hold of Matt…” his voice quivered. “I’ve called him almost every minute and texted him and-”“Jason, maybe he needs space,”“-he hasn’t even read a single text,” he complained, mostly with worry. “Maybe I should go over to his house and-”“Jason,” he repeated. “He might need space. Everything that went down was...really intense. And maybe he’s trying to be alone to rethink everything.”“But I don’t want him to,” he spat. Kurtis groaned.“Jason you’re being so childish,”“It’s because he gets caught up in drugs Kurtis,” he shouted, sniffing. “He always does. Whenever things get too much, he always feels like he has nowhere to fucking go. So he turns to this shit. That’s why I want him to pick up.”“E-Everything’s going to be okay...Jason,” Kurtis swallowed. “He stopped now, didn’t he? He promised he wouldn't.”“I know but…” he pursed his lips. “You never know, and I’m really scared.”“It’ll be okay. Trust me. He’s going to be better, but he needs to do it in his own pace.”Jason stared down at his phone again and opened it one more time.
JASON: please babe
JASON: you need to pick up
JASON: I’m worried about you
JASON: I love you
He stared down at his messages and felt his chest churn with the lack of replies. And how he wasn’t reading it. Jason’s bottom lip quivered as he bit down and slammed it face down so he could avoid looking at it.Matt watched his own phone buzz continuously. He was positioned by his bed, head resting against his pillow. He hadn’t moved for hours. He just stared off into space, doing nothing but thinking blankly and listening to the buzzes of his device.It was an odd feeling; to feel so empty. Broken in a way. It was probably the first time he felt like this since being with Jason. He tried to chuckle at the thought, but he failed. It came out as a small, airy exhale instead, and it grazed the sides of his neck.He remembered what happened horrifyingly vividly. Absolutely everything that happened. When his gaze dulled into grey and it felt like the whole world just darkened. He spent the whole day wondering. Wondering what would happen in the future. What would happen when school came back in and everyone saw him again. He could imagine them staring at him, with narrowed eyes and then misery would cast over. He couldn't help but to feel a tad guilty for some odd reason. He hadn’t been quite against his own sexuality for a while. A long while, and he was kind of proud of that. Since the group joined together and Jason was introduced more fondly into his life, he never had to feel guilty about himself. He never had to hate himself.But now that everyone knew...well that was a different story.He should’ve known that things were going to topple over soon enough. That things weren’t going to be picture perfect and fun forever. He should’ve known but. He couldn't help but to feel like this was single-handedly the worst way it could've gone down. Matt stared over at the phone again. It grew silent for a few pauses and it gave him time to breathe. To take up a few gulps of air before he felt his chest collapse. His parents were out of town, like they always seemed to be. Fair enough, he understood why they didn't want to be with him anyway. They were never a close knit family by any means.But it did make him feel a tad...and only a tad, lonely. It made his mind drift off. And the only voice he was used to hearing was his own. It got boring at its best, and overwhelming at its worst. He just wanted to escape. To disappear for a while. And then it hit him...He told himself that he would never do it again. Said that he would quit forever. Because he promised Jason. But the urges rose through his compressed chest and he couldn't take it anymore. His body just felt too empty. And this was the only way to fill it up. He cursed, lunging over to his bedside table and yanking out the bottom cabinet. It had everything he hadn’t touched in months. All his bongs, from his shitty ones to the ones that McCook got for him, to roll up paper and old, small plastic bags that used to contain substances. Mostly powder nowadays. There wasn’t anything left in most of them. All except one. It’s pure white like snow. It made him feel so much emptier as he stared back at it. Like fucked up nostalgia.He sighed.“I’m sorry…”He didn’t really know who he was apologizing to. His family. His friends. Jason. Himself.Just breathing it in was honestly enchanting. Really fucked up but still meltingly homey. He felt comfortable in the high, with his heart thumping at thousands of miles per hour and his pupils dilating at the euphoric rush. He let himself chuckle a little, maybe laugh, at how amazing it felt. Why did he ever quit? He cackled at the thought.He slumped down onto his bed, feeling it fog up in his mouth. And he cracked a smile. If this wasn’t perfect bliss, he didn't know what was.
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Danny felt, admittedly, a tad lonely. He felt like he was running out of people to turn to. Roy was always away now with his family so they could make sure that he wasn't running off again. He wondered why they didn't just ask Roy about how he was feeling, because it might have helped him. Danny already knew that this whole “counselling” thing at church would actually trigger Roy to run off again then stay. But he couldn't exactly tell Roy's parents that either.And his usual friends weren’t really available either. Max was sometimes, so he met up with him the most, but it still felt kind of stale and empty. Nothing against the grey-haired boy. It was mostly due to his extreme paranoia for Matt. He looked really stiff. He was nervous about school and what would happen when the holidays were over. And Danny couldn't help but to agree. He couldn't cheer him up this time. He met up with Kurtis a couple of times too, but he tended to be busy. Not only did he have work, but he was also mustering up the rest of his effort to look after Jason. To make sure that he wasn't doing anything dangerous because of what happened to Matt. He was really worried about his best friend.Danny could relate, in a way. Because he wanted to meet up with Jason to make sure he was okay too, but he continuously said that he was busy. Said that he had work, and his parents liked to travel and they were on road trips. But Danny knew that he was probably lying.
“Danny? Are you okay?”
So he was really glad when he found out that Courtney was available. Because he felt like tearing his hair out of his head. She looked over to him with wide eyes of curiosity before she yawned.“You’ve been really distracted lately,” she commented, sipping on her green smoothie.Danny kind of forgot that they were out at the mall. At a cafe situated near the outskirts of the large building. He shook his head and rubbed his eyes.“I’m a little tired…” he spent the last few nights writing music to get his mind off of things, which made him sleep deprived. It’s not like he had anything to do anyway.“I can tell,” she pointed directly over to the bags underneath his eyes. “...and I understand why.”“Hmm?” he gulped down his ice tea.“The whole Matt thing, right?” she questioned. “I’m really sorry about what happened.”“I-It’s okay,” he sighed. “I don't know where he is though. I’m guessing he's probably at home but he’s not picking up his phone. He hasn't looked at any of our messages and he hasn't even been online.”Courtney pursed her lips.“I honestly can't believe it,” she pulled a concerned expression. “I feel so bad for him. Especially because it was in front of everyone.”“Yeah. Man, I hate Brad,” he rolled his eyes.“And since it’s Brad, it probably means that everyone knows by now. All the footballers were there, and everyone else in school probably saw. That probably means that it’ll spread through the chains of gossip really quickly and-” Danny began to sniff, inhaling beats of air. Courtney immediately widened her eyes and leaned over. “Oh my god Danny! I-I’m so sorry-”“It’s fine,” he sighed for a moment, and took a sip of his drink to cool himself off. “Sorry, it just got overwhelming for a second.”“I get it…” Courtney gave him a sympathetic look as she rubbed his upper arm for comfort’s sake. “...honestly I wish there was something I could do. Because I really want to help out with Matt’s situation. And just all of your friends.”“Thanks Court,” he smiled over. His eyes grazed past her face and to the far distance until he spotted...him.He widened his eyes.It was Matt. Actually Matt. He had to close his eyes deeply and open them up again just to make sure that he wasn't hallucinating. He shoved his drink aside for a moment and stumbled to his feet. Danny quickly muttered a “I’ll be back” over to Courtney as he rushed over to Matt and some other boy strolling beside him. “M-Matt,” he sputtered out. The older boy turned around slowly, looking towards him with wide circular eyes. “I-I haven’t seen you around for awhile. How have you been?”The more Danny looked at him, the more unrecognisable he looked. Matt had recently, well as recently as Danny saw him, looked fine. Really good looking if he had to be honest. But he wouldn't tell Jason that. But now he looked...like the self he was before. When he used to do drugs.That’s the last thing Danny was hoping for and he immediately held his breath for aching anticipation as Matt’s eyes met his.They were painfully dilated and lost. Danny really, really was hoping that he wasn’t on drugs. Praying to god. “Great actually,” he piped out a chuckle, his breath having a dense odor. Danny cringed at it.“Y-You’re on drugs, aren't you?” he immediately piped out, coming out kind of like a squeak because of his nerves. Matt slowly crinkled open his eyes. He was pretty sure it was a blink but he was so out of it, it looked stupid.“Is it that obvious?” Brian McCook was the boy next to him, looking just as out of it as he was. “Yeah, it is,” Danny wrinkled his brows together. “You promised us you wouldn't.”“Sorry,” he shrugged. “I gotta get going so-”“Stop,” Danny held onto his sleeve. “Stay. I want to talk.”“I can barely talk,” he drew out with a low chortle. “What did you take?”“What did I even take?” he asked over to Brian, who was rubbing his temples. “Uhh...GHB?” his voice was far too unknowing for Danny’s comfort. “Are you fucking kidding?”“It...came in this blue bottle. No, blue liquid in-”“Matt,” he cried, feeling a little hopeless. “Do you remember what happened last time?”“That was meth,” he reassured poorly. “Come on. It’s different. And it takes my mind off the shit that’s happening.”“I’m telling Jason,” he let go of his grip around his arm. An arm that was far too skinny for him to not feel nauseous.“D-Don't,” he tried to act firm. “Don't tell him. Don't tell anyone.”“It’s for your own good,” he rushed away from him, gazing at him a final time with sympathetic eyes. He grabbed onto Courtney’s arm, the girl stumbling lopsidedly on her feet as she followed Danny.“W-What’s happening?” she said in confusion, flipping her head back to try and catch a glimpse of Matt.“We need to go,” he hurried inside, knowing that he was far enough from Matt to get away with it. “...it was Matt.”“Oh,” she grinned a little. “That's good, right?”“No, it’s not good,” he pressed his lips together. “Something really shitty is going to happen. Is happening.”He frantically texted all the boys individually, and they seemed to bolt back an answer in the first couple of minutes. If this wasn't a prologue for the shit that was to come, he didn’t know what was.
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Danny nervously fumbled his thumbs on Kurtis’s sofa. It felt a lot less comfortable than he imagined. Maybe it was because he was hoping for the best? Truth be told, the young boy wasn't expecting anything good to come from this. There were 5 of them today. The problem problem was, well, it wasn't Matt. It was Brian Firkus. And they were deliberating on what to do. With this shitty mess.“McCook’s the one who supplied him,” the country boy said in a low voice. “I managed to convince him to talk about it with me. But he won't say too much about it all..."“I thought he quit all of that,” Max gazed down. “...me too,” Brian sighed. “I told him not to. And he said he didn’t want to either but…” he shook his head to snap back into a state of logical reality. “I’m just worried. I’m going back home soon to Wisconsin and I’m nervous that something really bad is going to happen the moment I leave.”“We’ll look out for him. Promise,” Kurtis reassured, his stance still. “We need to do something though. And we need some sort of idea.”“What if…” Jason began. “...what if we did something. Like really cool.”“T-that’s a great idea…?” Max said in somewhat sarcastic encouragement. “No, like something so fun, that we get his mind off of it. Make him realise that we can leave soon, after we graduate and shit, so if we just survive these last few months, we can do whatever,” he shrugged. “Right? The school finding out shouldn’t be that big of a deal.”“I agree,” Kurtis backed up. “We should invite him over and remind him how fun it is to go out. Sober. And to hang out with friends.”“But he won’t even pick up his phone,” Max pointed out. “I guess that means we have to go over to him and force our way into his house,” Danny grinned. The other boys gasped with excitement. “Finally!” Jason rejoiced, running over to his car keys. “What about his parents?” the grey haired boy asked. “Oh they’re out,” Brian informed. “Business trip.”“Great! Maybe we should bring along stuff that’ll remind him of us. Remind him of things we love to do together,” Danny suggested. “I know he loves watching movies. Especially gay ones,” Jason enthused. “Oh! And he likes it when we get popcorn, and sit back, and joke along with the movie. Maybe have a few sodas. All that casual stuff.”“Then that's exactly what we’ll bring,” the youngest boy beamed. “We can actually get a movie legally for once.”It took about an hour to get everything together. The food, the drinks and the movie. The latter probably took the longest, because they debated over every single possible movie they could actually watch until they settled on “Brokeback Mountain”. Yeah, the god of all gay movies. Max was the least impressed by it.Danny excitedly hopped into the car, grocery bags of junk food pooling by his feet. Brian was the last to take the seat next to him, smiling over.“Have you ever been to his house before?” he asked, closing the door behind him.“No actually,” his excitement grew. “I’m so excited. Isn't he rich?”“Really rich,” Kurtis fastened his seatbelt in the driver’s seat. “I’m butt poor compared to him.”“Wow,” Danny gasped. “Does he live in a mansion and everything?”He didn't need anyone to answer that question. As they arrived to his house, large gates were standing by the front of the car. They were glistening golden. Perfect. Grand.“How are we gonna get in?” Brian asked, peering out of the window. Danny was frozen in his seat, the giant gates making him shiver slightly.“There’s a spare remote control in the mailbox,” Jason hopped out, lifting up the flap of the mailbox to draw out a small black controller. “They decided to put one in here because Matt’s really forgetful.”He clicked it, the gates slowly reeling open a long, wide driveway to the top. Danny honestly wondered how his friends were so privileged. The cheerleader entered the car again as Kurtis drove up the cemented road. The house in front of them was unbelievably beautiful. Perfectly painted. All the bushes were wonderfully trimmed. Everything, to the flowers, to the rocks to the fucking birds were placed perfectly. To fit the picturesque image of a beautiful household. So of course the family had to be perfect too. With each member being attractive, and successful and somewhat likeable by first glance. Danny honestly felt like getting out and running away. He was intimidated by how perfect this place was.He shook his head.Jason had already hopped out of the car, rushing over to the door to knock excitedly. He seemed so oddly casual in this place.Matt slowly opened the door. He seemed incredibly tired. He rubbed his eyes and raised his gaze to meet his face, instantly widening his eyes.“J-Jason?!” he screamed it like it was unbelievable insane. His eyes landed onto Kurtis’s car, then onto everyone’s faces. “Everyone? What are you doing here? How did you get in?”“We’re here to see you babe,” he reached out for his hand. “And also the remote’s still in the mailbox.”“W-We decided to bring a movie,” Max gulped, slowly making his way over to him. “And we brought some snacks, and some drinks,” Danny smiled.“So...can we come in?” Kurtis finished, locking the car. Matt debated internally for a bit. He looked back and forth from everyone, to their belongings, to Jason, who was pleading with his eyes. Until he caved in.“Fine,” he huffed. “I-I mean…” he rubbed the back of his head. “Come in.”Jason lunged over to him, wrapping his arms around him tightly, but he pushed him aside. Everyone gasped. Pause. Matt cleared his throat and rushed inside, leaving his own boyfriend gobsmacked by the door. Jason awkwardly straightened out his shirt and rushed inside, his head held down low.“...this is bad,” Brian muttered under his breath. “I’ve literally never seen him like this.”“Me either,” Max squeaked.“I’m gonna punch him,” Kurtis stared over at the door and grumbled.“Kurtis don’t do that,” Danny gave a long sigh. He wondered why they were here again for a moment.If Danny had to describe the night in one word, it was surprising. It started off awkwardly. Very awkwardly. No one really knew how to start conversations, and Brian started to give up after the first five minutes. But eventually they switched on the movie, everyone got engaged within the story in a flick of a switch, and everything seemed better again. A little childish, they know, but it was fun for them.“T-That was so good…” Jason mumbled out, sniffing by the end of the movie.This is where Danny expected Matt to comfort him like he usually did. He would usually hug him, and stroke his arm, and kiss his forehead. But he didn’t this time.They were sitting by the opposite sides of the room. With Matt in a single loveseat by the corner, and Jason on a sofa with Kurtis by his side.Danny could feel Max humming “awkward” under his breath as he pulled a face.“It really was,” Kurtis gave a long sigh. “Why didn't we just rent out a light hearted comedy?”“Aren't you the one who chose it?” Brian asked over.“...no,” the brunette looked away.“I’m gonna go get a drink,” see, Danny hypothesised that Matt would be feeling better after the movie. He was wrong. He was swayed for a little while over the sense of familiarity and comfort with the boys, but Matt slipped back into the moaning and groaning a few moments after. Danny was really upset by it. The five boys sat there for a quiet moment. “Jason…” Kurtis mumbled over to him. “...do you wanna go talk to him?”“I don’t think he wants to talk to me,” he sighed, defeated. “Come on, that’s not the Jason I know,” Danny encouragingly nudged. “You should go talk to him and sort things out.”“You know what?” He got from his spot. “You’re right. I’m gonna make him snap out of it.”Kurtis comforted him right out of the door and then sighed. “Good job Danny,” he grinned over as he messed up his hair. “Now we have to just wait and see if this works out…”They paused. “...do you guys wanna watch Glee?”“Oh god, I thought you’d never ask.”
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
Matt managed to gulp down a whole tall glass of water. He didn’t know how. He just knew that he was really thirsty and his throat was extremely dry. Too dry. It was due to either his relapsing or the tension in that room with those boys, and he was guessing the mixture of the two. Glancing down at the glass, he decided to fill it up to the top again by the tap as he recounted the whole night. The dripping and bubbling of the liquid distracted him just enough for him to ease into his thoughts.He did want to help out Jason. Well, comfort him. On the sofa after the movie. He loved to do that whenever they watched movies. It didn’t feel the same to be huddled up on a single chair alone. And to watch him just sniff by himself on the couch. But he really was thankful for his friends’ thoughts and efforts. Really thankful. More than he would ever express. It meant the world to him that they still cared after he completely abandoned them and refused to talk to them. It made him rethink whether he was doing the right thing or not. Being in this weird state of isolation. But it hurt, in a way. To see them. To have them near. Because it was a constant reminder of school. And what would happen when they got back. He just felt like it was easier to push them away. And to pretend that none of this was happening as he spent his time curled up in a ball in his room. he was grateful for everything they did, but in a way, he was just too selfish to realise why they were doing it. “Babe?” Jason peered into the kitchen, his presence small and muted compared to usual. “Matt?” he coughed out oddly. Like he wasn’t used to saying it. “Can we talk?”“Umm,” Matt’s thoughts scattered. “I-I think I’m about to go back.”“I know you're not,” Jason cut him off. “I know you well. Don't act like I don't.”Matt swallowed down a few gulps of his water.“What do you want to talk about…?” he reluctantly gave in, taking a seat by the counter. “This. This fucking thing that just happened,” Jason stood by the other side. “You ignoring this, this stupid drug thing, isn't going to make anything better," Matt jolted backwards with the intensity of his words. "You ignoring what happened at the diner isn't going to make anything better. We’re all worried about you and you're pushing us all away.”“Jason, don't make it out to be this massive thing because it’s not,” his tone was colder than what they were both used to. “I just need time and space to rethink everything.”“Why can't you think when you're sober then?” Matt’s voice hitched at the sentence. “...you promised you wouldn't.”“I promised myself I wouldn't too but I guess…” he glanced away, knowing that he couldn't say it to his face. “...I can break promises.”“...you can't say that confidently. I know you Matt. Maybe better than you know yourself,”“No way,”“Yes way,” he crinkled his brows. “You're underestimating me,” he turned his gaze over to him by lightly pressing his fingers under his chin and swerving his face around. “I’m going to tell you like I would anyone else…” he held his breath. “You’re an idiot.”“Jas-”“You’re a complete fucking idiot,” he teared up slightly as he uttered. “You know this isn’t going to blow over right? You know Brad. You were in a fucking football team with him for ages! You know how petty he is and you know exactly what he’s like!” he screamed at him. “He’ll never let this go, and he’s never going to fucking make you feel any better but you know what will?” he looked at him dead in the eyes. “Us. We could make it better.”“That's not-”“It is fucking true and you know it. And you hate to admit it,” he bit down on his lip. “And you hate to admit that you basically have nothing else sometimes. And it gets you down. But we love you Matt. Especially me…”“Jason I…” he swerved around the kitchen counter and towards him, wrapping his arms around him tightly. This felt right. He missed this feeling. Of being able to feel his heartbeat next to his own. “I’m...stupid. I know. I’m stupid. I’m sorry.”“Yeah, I know you fucking are,” he muttered through tears. “You fucking ignored me for a week Matt! A week. And you went off to ruin your body and your life again thinking that it’ll get better...a-and you know it won't.”“I’m sorry Jason!” he shouted. “I-I’m...sorry. Okay? I don’t know what to do with this mess. This is just insane to me! I never thought something like this would happen and I wanted to do anything to just get my mind off of it,” he shook his head. “My mind is travelling in three million directions and I just want, for one moment, to stop. To stop. And to pretend that none of this is happening. Drugs,” he sputtered the word out with crinkles in his voice. “...they let me do that. They let me escape, just for a little while. And I feel free.”“Babe…” he sniffed into his chest. “Please...please don't say that,” he raised his face, his blood shot eyes meeting his bright blue ones. “You mean the absolute world to me...you know that. I can't, I feel-” He ran to the sink, throwing up all that tenseness in his stomach. Matt widened his eyes at the sight, almost instantly doing everything in his power to make him feel better. The ex-football player rubbed his back comfortingly, making sure he didn’t choke on any vomit. Filling up a glass of water, he helped him take a few sips before the cheerleader fell to his knees.“J-Jason,” Matt’s hands trembled at he rubbed his thumb over Jason’s clasped ones. “I-I’m…” tears fell from his cheeks as his boyfriend rested his head onto his shoulder. “I’m quitting. That’s it. I promise I can’t. I won’t. Ever. Again,” he shook his head. “I’m sorry for putting you through all of this. All of my bullshit. I stopped talking to everyone b-because I thought avoiding everything was the best solution. But it wasn't. It isn't. Because I know things don't actually get better and nothing will sort out. I need to step it up, and man up, and realise that I need to do something about the situation if I want to fix it. I-I realised that now,” he raised his gaze. “S-So don’t...freak out. Do that. I-I don’t know. Get sick? The only thing I know is that...I love you. So much and I can't see you like this.”He rushed to get up, stumbling to his feet as he threw out all the drawers of his kitchen messily. “I have medicine, to help with nausea,” he popped out a tablet and held it in his hand. “Take it. And we can make you warm tea and-”“Matt,” he coughed out. His boyfriend paused. “It’s okay,” he graciously took the pill though with a gulp. “I’m feeling better because...this is all I wanted to hear. For you to realise that,” he hugged him tightly, letting go of the glass by the bench. “We all love you. Especially me. I really, really love you.”“I love you too,” he kissed him gently yet firmly, holding him tightly in his arms. He felt relieved. Like he was where he truly belonged. By Jason. It made him thankful and happy that Jason was still there for him. Even after all his bullshit. “Also,” as they parted, Jason shoved his hand into his jacket pocket. He pulled out a small card. It triggered nostalgia immediately with Matt as he took it into his hands.
Let’s live on so we can make more memories together. I’m looking forward to living the rest of my life with you
Matt teared up at the note, a single tear staining the edge of the paper. He sniffed, and kissed Jason again, feeling like he absolutely needed to.“I want to spend the rest of my life just loving you,” he mumbled into his lips. Jason melted into the sense of comfort.“And I’ll spend the rest of my life loving you back.”
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
Danny was extremely delighted when he saw that the couple had rekindled. They were back by each other’s sides again, like they never left. Inseparable.It was around 10 PM when they headed off to bed. He was thankful for Matt’s godly riches. Literally, he swore that he had godly powers or something just because of his family's riches. The things money could do. He had two spare bedrooms so it meant that they could all conveniently split off. Matt gestured casually, saying that he had a lot of extended family that would stay over at their house so they needed to have quite a few spare rooms, but having 2 large ones with their own en suite was a little too much. Jason obviously stayed in Matt’s room, which had a large King sized bed from what Danny saw. Brian and Kurtis broke off together in one room with two single beds, so Max and Danny got stuck with the room with the queen sized bed. Well, getting “stuck with it” was a rude way to say it. They both didn't mind. It was a beautifully set out room, and the bed itself was comfortable. But of course Brian had to sleep in a single. Because he had to stay loyal to his not-boyfriend.Danny rolled his eyes at that.He slipped into his pajamas in the bathroom and strolled out, messing up his own hair as he slumped himself down on the bed. By then, Max had turned on the bedside lamp, so the room was a dimly lit.“Did you have a good day today Danny?” Max asked, turning to his side. “Yeah everything went to plan, I guess,” he shrugged. “Maybe a little differently to what I expected but...I’m happy.”He casually scrolled down his Facebook feed as Max gushed about how good the movie was. He was happy to know that he ended up liking the movie, especially because he was so against it when they originally got it. Maybe it was a sign that he was warming up to the whole "gay" thing. Scratch that. He seemed to be much happier about it now. Like he completely accepted himself. Well, nearly. Soon enough he would get there. Danny believed that full heartedly. “I’m just happy that Matt’s feeling better, you know?” the older boy grinned to himself as he brought the blankets closer to his chin.“Yeah…” he mumbled, stumbling onto a post on his feed. He paused. “Hey Max, look at this.”It was a post made by Brad. Originally made by Brad. He wasn’t friends with him on Facebook, obviously, but it seemed to be shared or commented on by every single one of his peers. Like every single person at school. The one he saw was by Jay. His favourite person.
Went to the usual diner today and found out that Matt was a fag. Yeah, that Matthew Lent.
Danny wondered why it didn't automatically tag him, but then realised that he deleted his account a few days prior. It was his way to disappear for a while.
I don't know how I didn't realise that there was a literal gay guy in the football team. What a great way to stay closeted.
Max gulped.“Is he serious?” he crinkled his brows. “What did everyone else say?”Danny scrolled down to the comments. If he had to put a statistic on it, it would be like 70% calling out Matt, 25% that was confused, and 5% actually saying shit to Brad. In that 5% was Court, Will and ‘Laska, which Danny was happy to know.
Jay Jackson: I knew it all along
Lies. Danny thought immediately, rolling his eyes.But the comments went on. So many people were just plain confused, some saying that he was lying, but then replied to by so many people who were actually there. It blew up to a point where Danny couldn't take it. There were over a hundred comments and around 50 shares. It was posted a few days ago and it was just some shitty post made by some asshole. It wasn't even like it affected anyone other than the seniors at their small, mundane school. He didn’t understand the whole “popularity” circulating around it. They went to a small school, in virtually the middle of nowhere. There was absolutely no appeal to where they lived, nonetheless the school. It was an average place with too many similar looking houses and way too many white people. So nothing like this had ever happened before. To this extent of popularity. Especially for some Facebook post. “Look at this one,” Max pointed at it. “ ‘I thought people like this wouldn't exist in our school but I was wrong’. Really? How old are they?” “I have no idea how we go to the same school,” Danny groaned. “Honestly, I thought everything was gonna get better. Aren't we supposed to be the new generation or whatever? Like be more progressive and accepting?”“Not around here Danny. It’s what happens when all we hear is homophobia and sinning,” Max sighed deeply. “That’s why I ended up like this, right?”“How are you feeling about it?” Danny mumbled over. “...I feel better,” he cocked his head to the side to ponder. “A lot better, actually. I’m...what's the word?” he snickered. “Happy.”“That's oddly non descriptive for you Max,” he teased.“No other word I can use Danny. I’m happy. Happy,” he smiled. “With myself. Well happier. To a point where I can wake up every morning and feel comfortable in my own skin.”“That sounds amazing Max,” Danny shuffled a little closer, instantly rethinking over whether that was a good choice or not. The whole “leading him on” thing was still fresh in his mind. “I’m so so happy.”“You can't use a better word Danny?” he teased back, making Danny pull a joking face. “Fine,” he huffed. “Wonderful. Delighted. Ecstatic.”“That's better,” they both laughed. “Now, all that's left is for us is to convince Matt that he should love himself too, despite what everyone else thinks.”“Or, we can just make him realise that he's super lovable,” Danny pointed out, and they exchanged acknowledging looks. “That's a good point,” he smiled. “Okay, off to bed-”“Wait,” he stopped him from reaching over to the lamp. “Hey, I’m...sorry. About everything that-”“Shoosh Danny,” Max held his index finger to his lips and grinned. “Don't. If you're going to apologise about us. And everything going on between us, or whatever that went on, just stop yourself from doing it. Number one, I don't want to hear it. Number two, you don't need to. You don't need to apologise for anything.”“Not even like the whole “leading you on” thing. I don't even know what that means,” Danny whined as Max chuckled at his words. “I just know that it's bad and I didn’t mean to do it and I’m sorry.”“Danny, it’s fine. I'm over it,” he shrugged. “I guess its something you realise when you grow up. That some things are out of your control, and you can't just make things better. No matter how hard you try. And you start to realise that, it’s for the better,” he pressed his lips together. “Things happen for a reason, so it means that this happened for a reason too. And I’m at peace with that.”“Wow…” Danny couldn't help but to gasp in awe. “...you're the best person in the world.”“Haha, very funny Danny. Thanks for the thought though,”“I’m being serious,” he cleared his throat to regain actual consciousness. “You’re pretty amazing Max. You’re gonna go be successful one day, you know that?”“Let’s hope so,”“No, I know so,” Danny nodded confidently. “So hopefully we're still friends in the future so I can brag about you.”Max bursted out into laughter and shook his head. As he took a deep breath, he reached over to the lamp to turn it off.“You’re amazing Danny. You should give yourself more credit,” he sighed into the sheets as he closed his eyes. “And when you do,” he grinned. “I’ll give you a chunk of my salary.”“Oh thank god,” he melted into the covers. “Because I’m planning to be a musician when I grow up which means I’ll be virtually homeless so-”“Go to sleep Danny.”
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
It was the next day, around early noon, when he came in. The 6 boys were all circled around the TV. It was the usual, lazy morning. Max cooked up a warm breakfast for all of them, Danny learning that Brian was a vegetarian for the first time in his life. They briefly talked about it, you know, just casual small talk, and then they turned to the TV and binge watched stupid cartoon shows from their childhood. It was pretty nice morning. The smell of coffee and the taste of scrambled eggs was the definition of his mornings with them.
“Matthew?”
But then he had to come in and ruin it. Well, technically it was a 'they', but the woman left almost immediately. They were Matthew’s parents. The ones that were supposedly off in a business trip, except they seemed to come back 3 days early.Matt stumbled to his feet, quickly turning off the TV. The room was struck with sudden silence. He straightened out his shirt and gazed towards them with a shocked expression.“Mom? Dad?” he cleared his throat. “W-What are you doing here?”“It’s our house,” his mom tried to joke lightheartedly as she strolled into the other room. Almost too casually. “I’m kidding dear. Your father’s work was…” she looked over at her partner. “Cut short.”Matt looked over to his dad, and they locked eyes for a moment. It was so intense that the other boys could feel their chests churn awkwardly.Danny could tell that his dad was physically agitated and frustrated. He couldn't exactly figure out why, but it was pretty obvious by his body actions. The way he slammed down his belongings by the front door. The way he rubbed his temples and cursed under his breath.Matt didn’t know whether to help, ask or just stay quiet. So he just stayed quiet.“Maybe you boys should go home,” his dad said, not looking at any of them. Danny watched Max wrinkled his brows with frustration and his lack of respect, but he was quick to give in. He already began to shuffle forward until Matt cut him off.“Wait, why?” he questioned.“Because we’re home now,” the older man exhaled.“B-But they don't need to leave,” he persisted further. His father eyed him harshly and rubbed his chin.“Matthew,” he addressed firmly. “We need to have a chat. And I’d appreciate it if your friends left. Is that clear?”“Very clear,” Jason just decided to jump in for him. His boyfriend looked over to him, a tad annoyed due to everything that was happening, but Jason reassured him with a small look. “Thank you for letting us stay.”They all dragged their feet behind them, awkwardly gathering their belongings to then leave. Matt accompanied them towards the door, pressing his lips together and glancing down.“I’m sorry guys…” he mumbled.“It’s okay,” Max brushed off quickly with a smile.“Yeah,” Brian agreed.“Now I realise why we can never go over to yours,” Kurtis snickered, unlocking his car. “But hey, it’s fine. Hopefully this “chat” goes down well.”“Mmm, let’s hope so,” Matt rolled his eyes.“Wait,” Danny intervened. “This is probably the absolute worst idea and I don't want to just eavesdrop on a personal conversation but-”“Oh,” the ex-footballer smirked slightly. “You want me to call you while it’s going on?”His intrigue in Danny’s idea made the younger boy excited.“I mean, I guess,” he brushed his hair down.“That would be fun,” Matt chuckled. “You guys can finally see why I hate my dad so much.”“I-I don’t know Matt…” Max worried. “What if we talk and then he finds out-”“I’ll mute the call,” he shrugged. “It’ll be funny.”“What if it’s something really serious?”“It’ll be some shitty thing,” Matt laughed casually. “Trust me. He’ll either tell me to take school more seriously, or force me to join the football team again. It’ll be fine.”“...if you say so,” he said cautiously.So as the other boys left and backed out of the long driveway, Kurtis pulled up by the corner of the street. He called the brunette boy and he immediately picked up, muting the call and sticking his advice into his pocket. Switching it onto speaker, he placed it down by the middle of the car. The five boys stared at it attentively. “Matthew,” his father began. His voice came in a little muffled through the lack of good connection. “I’m the one who actually ended the conference early.”“Why?” the boy asked, pulling out a chair. Presumably in the kitchen, by the way it squeaked across the marble floors. “I thought it was really important.”“Because this talk is very important. And I felt like I needed to do this now,” he exhaled.“Fucking liar. You don’t care about Matt at all,” Jason commentated with a frustrated expression.“Your mother was looking through her Facebook the other night…” “Oh no,” Max and Danny said in unison, already dreading exactly what was to come. The youngest boy held his breath and prayed that it wasn't what he thought it was. It couldn't be.“Have you seen it?” the older man asked his son. Matt raised an eyebrow.“Seen what?”“It was a post by your friend. Brad?” Matt lost all the colours of his face. He went numb for a moment. Enough to make him feel like he was about to topple to his side. Like his body gave out completely and he was going to collapse entirely. And hopefully never wake up. “W-What about it?” his words cracked. Danny watched Jason bite down on his lip. “I thought you two were friends,” his voice lowered.“We’re not really…” he muttered. “Ever since you left the football team?” the dad’s voice hardened.“No, ever since we met,”“Don't give me that attitude,” he argued, making the teenage boy squirm, in his seat.“B-But I’m telling the truth!” he fought weakly. “Brad and I aren't friends. We haven't ever been. And what is this stupid Facebook thing?!”“It’s a post that he made addressing your sexuality,” The world fell apart. Everything in their universe stood still. Like it was frozen in time, just to watch Matt’s face shrivel up and whimper. He tried to pass it off as an exhale, but his sniffs gave it away. Gave away the fact that he was cracking apart. His dad glared down at him, his irises pulsing.“No,” his father shook his head, denying it. “You can't be.”“I-I’m not,” he trembled distressingly. “Dad, I’m not.”“But with Brad’s claims and-”“He hates me! He lies all the time!” he pleaded. “Dad, you have to believe me.”“I-I don’t know what to believe,” he sighed deeply, resting his elbow on the table. Well, more like slamming it. “Matthew, you better be right. I want to believe you but…”“Why wouldn't you dad? I’m your own son!”Maybe what hurt the other boys so much, listening to all of it, was that they’d never heard Matt pleading like that. Where he sounded like he would risk anything to convince his dad. And to convince his dad something that was entirely false. It was the first time they'd ever heard him beating himself up so much. “I've known Brad since he was little. He has never lied,” “But I’m your own son!” he persisted. “...is that why you've never had a girlfriend Matthew?”“I just don't have time for girls,” he excused. “With football, and school, and friends-”“Why can't you be like all the other boys your age?” he spat. “I thought you were fitting in fine Matthew.”“I am! I’m doing well in school!”“Where did I go wrong?”“Y-You never…” he swallowed hard, keeping down the aching urge of tears by the inside of his neck. “...n-never went wrong…”“I need to talk about this with Brad’s father-”“Don't!” he threw himself to his feet, immediately sitting back down when he realised his actions. “...t-they’re not going to…”“Matthew, look into my eyes and tell me the truth,” he positioned himself right in front of his son. His gaze was intense, so intense that it made Matt’s knees whimper beneath him. He cradled his fingers together to stop them from fidgeting. Matt sniffed, feeling the overwhelming sense of regret and guilt take over. “Are you or are you not gay?”“Dad,” he started off, but the singular word grazed his jaw. He didn't even realise how hard it was to talk. To function. Tears unknowingly rolled down his cheeks, his face already burning hot from the thick air. His last specks of confidence blew away as his father sighed. “Dad, I’m-”“That’s enough Matthew,” he stiffly rose from his stance. His steps were forceful and rigid like he was an old figurine. One that needed oil in its joints. Matt watched him stand by the other side of the kitchen counter, reaching over to the liquor cabinet to open it. Reaching in, he grabbed a Jack Daniels and twisted it open. The son watched him gulp it down. And he swallowed as well. “Dad I-”There was a large crack. One that rang through all the boys’ ears on the other side of the phone. The bronze liquid oozed down the pure white walls, staining it an off colour. Matt’s breathing hyped up nervously.“I’m sorry!” the words scratched him as he spoke. It was deafening to hear his own voice like this. “Dad! Please! Can we talk about this?”“MATTHEW!” the strength of his voice alone made Matt coward back. “Don’t say another word.”He swallowed down everything he had to say. Not like it was anything anyway. They were all just excuses at the end of the day. Nothing seemed to matter anymore because Matt lost. Fair and square. He lost the game and there was no way to recover from it. Matt lowered his chin to his chest. He didn't even have the heart to lock eyes with his dad. He didn't have the motivation to make an effort anymore. Because that was it. There was nothing he could do to recover from it.He limped out of the kitchen, just grazing past the man who he couldn't really call his “parent” anymore. He held in his words to avoid toppling over.“My son’s a dirty faggot,” it was a mutter underneath the man’s breath, but Matt heard it loud and clear. His ears twitched at it, as he raised his gaze a little. “I conceived a fag.”That was it for him. He blacked out.
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
Jason was on his last nerve. He was ready to kick Kurtis out of the driver’s seat and bust back into his house, standing up to Matt’s dad and maybe committing a murder. He honestly had his full heart set on running away with Matt and never looking back. The only thing that the boys heard was a sudden thud. Then a huge crack from the lack of phone reception. Like a TV with no signal. It bleeped out for a second, but what could be heard was the dad constantly yelling. It sounded like it was from pain and agony mixed in with overwhelming fury. The words were unclear, but the emotion still pierced through. Crystal clear. Matt screamed back as the phone collapsed along with him. It came through as a painful thump to the floor. The young boy’s screams melted down to yelps. More like cries. For help presumably. And with one last pound that sounded like a bang, the phone beeped to silence.The car sat still, and the boys all faced each other. Mortified. Looking like they just came back to life from a devastating death. “I’m going back in there,” Jason was the first to speak up, undoing his seatbelt to throw himself out of the car. Kurtis struggled to yank him back in. “Don't do that Jason,” he fought. “It’s not going to make any of this better. We can’t even fucking get in.”“S-Should we call the police? This is domestic violence,” Max tried to solve the issue. He brought out his phone, holding it within his trembling hands.“That's a great call Max,” Brian noted. “Let's do that. But...we can’t do anything else right now. I’m sorry Jason.”Jason hiccuped and stepped out of the car for a moment, taking a few deep breaths. Kurtis unbuckled his seatbelt and rushed for his support, rubbing his back comfortingly as he held him tightly in his embrace. Danny's eyes were glued on them. He couldn't help but to feel stuck. Like he couldn't do something, but he really wanted to. And there was no way to just make things better. No matter how hard he tried. Maybe this was what Max was talking about the other night. About how some things are out of your control and you can't do anything. But man, he really wished that he could something. Because this was painful to see unfold. Brian sighed.“I feel so bad for Jason,” he mumbled. “...and I’m so sorry you had to see that. I just wish I could talk to Matt. Just comfort him.”“Me too,” before Danny could give out a full reply, he was cut off by the phone calling again. He frantically gestured for the two boys to step back in again so they could take the call.“H-Hello?” Jason answered, his voice shaky with tears.“Jason? Is this on speaker?” Matt spoke. Barely spoke, actually. His voice was tearful and grazed. Like he was trying to talk but his throat was so dry that he couldn't make out proper words. It was just as painful to hear as it was to talk for him. “Yeah, yeah it is,” he sniffed and straightened himself up. Mostly because he was trying to convince himself that he was okay. He really wasn't okay. “I’m guessing you heard a lot of it…” Jason’s voice hitched at his words.“Babe, I’m coming. You’re gonna escape and you’ll stay with me and-” he cut himself off when Max shook his head over to him cautiously.“I can’t Jason,” Matt replied with his head down. “I’m sorry guys. I’m really sorry about that.”“Don't be sorry about anything,” Kurtis reassured. “We’re here if you ever need any support.”“Thanks guys…” his voice cracked slightly as he inhaled. “It’s gonna be okay Matt,” Danny chimed in, not even realising that he was starting to tear up himself. His emotions came through loud and clear for Matt, who began to whimper into his palm.“...I can’t believe it,” he softly sobbed, crinkling his eyes shut. “I can’t believe it went down like that.”“Matt…” Jason mumbled, sympathy and empathy choking him by the neck.“I’m sorry,” he cried. “I’m sorry. I can't talk right now. I need to go.”The phone beeped through the car, the soft radio coming back on. Conveniently playing “Mad World” by Gary Jules. Danny wanted to snicker at it to sweeten the mood. But nothing came out. They all sat there for a moment. No one knew what to say. What would you say in a situation like this? There's nothing really to say...actually. This felt like the next coming of the apocalypse.
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
It was the end of the holidays already. It went past way too quickly for Danny’s liking. The first week seemed “eventful”, if that was the best way to put it, but the second week was virtually empty. Too empty. Matt didn’t talk to them for the whole week. Again. It was like he was detached from the world. But this time it was because his phone was taken off of him. He promised that that was the case really last minute on the group chat just before his dad came in and snatched it off of him. The only thing that seemed to keep him sane was the small note that Jason gave him that sat underneath his pillow. He’d look at it every moment he could have.His dad made him spend the most of his hours out and about. Helping him with work, helping out at the church, and actively trying to force him to do sports. Thinking that it would make him more “straight” or something. That wasn't the case at all, but it made his dad feel more at ease with the situation. Just a little. The other boys weren’t busy at all though. Max mostly spent his time studying and practising his music. For the first time in his life, he actually managed to get bored. Yeah, bored. Of everything he was doing. Everything seemed too repetitive after a while, and it was just lonely with none of the boys around. For some odd reason, they didn't really have the heart to meet up as a four.Jason was off with his parents often. They’re looking out for his future - he says. They’d travel around to find a university or college he’d like, but he didn’t have the energy to fully force a smile and make a good excuse nonetheless a choice. The future was dreadful, especially now that Matt wasn’t possibly apart of it.Kurtis’s parents were actively trying to get him out of the house. Something he found odd because they were barely at home to begin with. He was sent off to his farm for the week just after they found out about Brad’s post on Facebook. It seemed to blow up quicker than anyone expected. To a point where even the adults started to get involved in the mess as well as the kids. From weird paranoia, Kurtis’s parents thought that the “gay” would get to him too, so they quickly sent him away for a while so he wouldn’t have any connection to Matt or any of his other friends. He fell painfully lonely.And Danny? Well, he seemed to fall down the same hole of loneliness as the rest of them. He started off by writing music again, something he luckily managed to muster up the courage to do. But halfway through composing the newest one, he realised how empty he felt. He didn’t have anything to write about. So he just left it. He tried sketching, but found no inspiration for that either. He tried meeting up with Courtney, but she wasn’t always free. He tried Roy, but his parents were having an absolute hissy fit about the “Brad phenomenon” too. So they restricted everything he was doing.Danny really underestimated how bad it was going to be. He hated Brad. He always had. But he never knew that some shitty thing he did would blow up, and it would create this wave of controversy across their small town. It’s always been a religious town, so it was a given. But what made it “juicy gossip” for them was mostly due to the Matt aspect of it. The fact that Matt Lent went straight from town hero who scored winning games; from good looking jock with an irresistible smile; from a charming popular boy to...a fag. Just known as this sinning fag that no one wanted to look at. Everyone made it out like they got fooled by him. Like they got betrayed in some way by him, even though that wasn't true at all. More like the opposite if anything.Danny admittedly couldn't stop thinking about it. He lost sleep, and stopped eating, and he stared off into space often accidentally. He was just scared for what was to come. For what would happen to him and his friends. He was obviously really happy when he came out to his mom, but that didn't mean he would be comfortable and happy to come out to literally everyone else. He sighed and rested his head against his pillow, trying to sink himself into the bedsheets so he could just disappear for a little while. Maybe a long while.His phone suddenly buzzed, making him sit up and lean over to his bedside table. Dust started to collect by the outer corners of his phone case.
ROY: Hey Danny
ROY: you free?
Everything in his world suddenly lit up. He scrambled to his feet, smashing the keyboard.
DANNY: yeah of course
ROY: well
ROY: look outside
He ran to his large windows, swinging it open and peering outside. Roy was right there. Down by the lawns of Danny’s house, waving. He had the biggest smile by his lips. A toothy grin that made the younger boy melt.“Roy!” he couldn't help but to screech it in joy. “Shh!” Roy chuckled and brought his index finger to his lips. “I can’t be out here.”“I’m coming down,”He nearly tripped over his feet as he dashed down the stairs. He stumbled to the front door, rushing to open it. Roy was staring back at him, his gaze dyed the colour of pure joy.“Hey,” he breathed out, pressing his lips together. “Hey,” Danny huffed out, trying to catch his breath. A smile creeped onto his lips, tingles of excitement filling his body. “Can I come in?” he shoved his hands into his pockets. “O-Of course,” he stammered, guiding him towards his room. It felt oddly surreal for Danny. He didn't really know what to do. Because it felt more like a dream than reality. In a way, he kind of forgot what it was like to actually talk to other people. He laughed at himself at that thought. “Are you even allowed to be here?”“Nope,” he smirked. They took a seat by Danny's sofa.“Rebellious,” he smiled back mischievously. “I like that.”“Where are your pa-I meant mom. Where’s your mom?” he tried to hide it off with a grin. “She’s off at work,” he shrugged casually. “Yours?”“At home,” his smile widened with excitement. “They still think I’m upstairs. Studying.”“Roy that's really dangerous,” the younger brunette warned. “They're going to think that you ran away again. And if they find out that you’re here, with me, instead of studying, they’re never going to let us see each other.”Roy groaned childishly and snuggled a little closer to the younger boy. It made Danny’s face burn slightly, mostly from mixed feelings. He didn't know whether to convince him to go back home because it was the right thing to do, or just hide him away for a little while because he was selfish and he missed his boyfriend.He was kind of convinced with the latter statement at this point.“But I want to be here,” Roy snickered into his neck. “I might as well. These are the last school holidays I will ever have,” he muttered a little sadly. “...this is it Danny. I can't believe it.”“These might be the last school holidays, but they’re not going to be the last holidays with me,” he smiled over, wrapping an arm around him. Peering up at him, the other boy gave him a comforting grin. “I don’t get it. I spend weeks muddled up in my own head, but talking for you for a few seconds always straightens me out,” he exhaled. “Thanks Danny...I’m getting nervous about the future. You know?”“You have every right to be. Growing up isn't easy, but we all have to do it. And we should make the most of it,” his fingers lightly traced around the markings of his shoulders. “...in saying that, I don’t want to grow up either.”Roy chuckled in an admiring fashion, draping his arms over the younger boy. “Are you gonna try and convince me to go back?” he asked with an amused look. “No, I realised that I actually really like you here,” he peered down at him with a wide, toothy grin. “Also I like bad boys.”Roy bursted out into laughter.“Very funny Danny,” he commented, his hand running down the ends of his locks. “I like your new haircut by the way. I never got to say it when I first saw it.”“Aw, thanks,” he played with the tips of his hair. “I like it too. It grew on me a lot more.”“I can see more of your face now,” he smirked. “And it gives you a different vibe about you. But I like you either way.”Danny chuckled, gazing over at him with a sincere smile. Every single time he looked into his eyes, long enough for him to take a couple of deep breaths, he always looked back on their time together. How far they've come and how thankful he was to know him. He was just grateful for Roy. Everything he brought to his life. From the good to the bad. Danny was just thankful for everything.“Hey Danny?” Roy piped, his eyes lingering on his face. “Yeah?”“Whatever happens with this mess that’s going on in this town,” he parted his lips. “We’re going to get through it together, okay? Even if somehow my parents find out, because of this huge paranoia that’s going on because of Matt and Brad’s post, I’m not going to care. We’ll just run off and do our own shit.”“Okay,” he pressed his lips into a straight line. “This paranoia is crazy though.”“I know,” he agreed. “It’s absolutely absurd honestly. All these parents are gathering around town to go to church and sort things out. Debate whether it’s true or not. It’s getting messy apparently.”“Maybe they should stop caring about it,” Danny rolled his eyes. “I mean, they’re making such a big deal out of it.”“Have you seen Matt?”“After this blew up?” the other boy nodded. “No, actually. We’re kind of banned from this house right now…? And he’s not picking up his phone. So I’m admittedly really worried about him. He’s kind of...disappeared. Off the radar.”“Oh,” Roy said in a worried tone. “I didn’t know it was that serious.”“Yeah…” he sighed. “It sucks because these are the last holidays, you know? What if I never get to hang out with him again.”“You’ll definitely see him again Danny,” he reassured. “I get why he needs space though.”“Me too,” he gave in. “I guess there’s no point in worrying either. I’ll just see what he’s like when school goes back in.”“Which is incredibly soon,” Roy groaned. “Man, these holidays have gone quickly.”“Not for me,” Danny pouted. “I’ve been bored for most of it.”“You didn’t see Courtney?”“She was out with Willam, like, for most of it,” he complained. “They apparently went out to the city to check out apartments.”“Are you fucking kidding?” Roy accidentally snapped. He jerked his brows. “...Jesus.”“I know,” even Danny was a little caught off guard with them. “I didn't think it was that serious.”“I thought that they started going out, like, a few months ago,”“Same but…” he shrugged. “I guess they really like each other.”“But moving out together? Don't you think that's a little too quick?”“Mmm, I think Courtney has the ability to tell whether she wants to or not,” the younger boy brushed off quickly.“Aren't lesbians notorious for moving in together quickly and then breaking up?”“I trust Courtney,” Danny fought pettily. “She’ll be fine. If I was her, I’d move out too, to be honest.”“I thought that’s what we were doing,” Roy questioned, regaining the smile on his face from earlier. “That’s what we are doing,” he matched his grin. “I don't know where. Or how we’ll get there. But we will. Definitely.”“You’ve always been so oddly adventurous Danny,” he enthused. “I love that.”“I know you do,” he poked out his tongue jokingly and collapsed into his embrace. “...you gonna head home soon?”“I probably should,” he gently pushed back Danny to his previous position. The younger boy pouted as he pressed his back against the sofa. “They’re probably going to start looking for me soon. And I don't want to be there to see their reaction when they start to panic.”“How’d you even get out?” Roy stuck his hands into his pockets as he headed over to the front door. “Snuck out my window,” he said in an aloof manner, kind of shocking Danny with his sort of rebellious act. “And then climbed down.”“Wow, athletic,” Danny rested his elbow against the chair, and fanned his fingers by his cheek. “But did you think of how you were gonna get up?”Roy paused.“Oh shit,”“Mmm, not very academic,” he teased. “Good luck getting up there.”“I hate it when you act so smug,” he swiftly stepped over and planted a kiss by his lips. “Wish me luck.”“Good luck.”Danny watched Roy sneak back into his house. From the looks of it, he was able to enter through the back door of his house, and rush upstairs. When he entered his bedroom again, he waved over to Danny, who looked up at him, amused. Sipping on a glass of water, he gave a small wave back and smiled widely. This was basically the highlight of the holidays for Danny. It was short. Incredibly short. But lovable, sweet, and everything he needed in that time. He missed Roy. And he just needed to see him. Not only because he missed him, but also because he needed to make sure that he was healthy, and he was doing fine. And he was. He seemed happy and sane, and that’s all that Danny needed to feel better.Danny smiled to himself, finishing off the glass of water as he rested it into the kitchen sink. School was going back soon, but he couldn't help but to let his mind linger on the thought of Roy. He truly did love him.
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
This was the day.It was nerve wracking for all the boys. It felt kind of like going to a war. It felt serious. Dark. And there were tingles of nerves by the balls of their feet.Max stuck his long legs through his black jeans. They were ones that were much tighter than usual. They were the ones that he put on when they went out that one night, and it still reeked of light alcohol and gay sweat. Gay sweat. It’s what Max dubbed this particular smell. It wasn’t bad by any means. It was oddly nostalgic and it sent a rush through him. It was the rush of confidence that he needed for that day. He dressed a little differently to what he usually did. Not as conservative, but still him. Even his parents picked up on it, giving him a confused look, maybe a borderline worried look, but he ignored it as he neatly placed his books into his bag and rushed out.The three usual boys who drove to school together didn’t give each other a single word when Max entered the car. It was absurd for them not to. Only a little “hi”, as the tallest boy buckled up his seatbelt.It was a few moments until Kurtis raised his voice.“Are you guys ready for today?” he gripped onto the steering wheel tighter. Kurtis was wearing his usual clothing, but lacking that flamboyant flair that it usually had. It was due to two reasons. Number one, he didn't want to stand out as much, because of the whole Brad thing. They were dubbed as “Matt’s crowd”, and more specifically “Matt’s bad crowd”, so he didn't want to “appear more gay”. Like he usually did. Number two, his parents became paranoid too. They started picking up on his “odd fashion” and “out-there looks” and started getting cautious. So they limited what he was meant to wear and made him look a little more conservative. So his hats were removed all together, and his colours turned more to greys and blacks. Still classy, but less gay. That’s how Kurtis would describe it. “No,” Jason answered honestly. He looked duller than usual too. His eyes were sunken in, and his arms looked skinnier than usual. You could say the same thing about his body, but everything was more covered than usual. His pants were longer and baggier, and his sweater was virtually swallowing him up. It was just rolled up enough to display his somewhat discoloured skin. He looked more like a skeleton than anything. Kurtis knew that his parents were starting to get worried, and tried to help him through it. They knew that he was gay, and the town was going into a frenzy over the topic of sexuality, but they supported him so they obviously wanted to help him through it. But he wasn’t really letting any of their words sink through.“I’m excited to see everyone and have classes,” Max tried to smile through it. His attempts to brighten up the mood rubbed Jason the wrong way. But Kurtis, for one, appreciated it a lot. “Like, I haven't caught up with Danny for a while.”“Me either, I heard that he was catching up with songwriting,” Kurtis continued the light hearted conversation. “I’d love for him to continue on writing. I wanna hear another one act-”“Are we going to act like nothing is happening?!” Jason cried, bringing his sleeve up to his eyes. “This whole fucking town is going into a frenzy over this “gay epidemic” thing. And - holy shit - we’re all gay,” he drew out sarcastically. “Aren't you all worried about what’s happening? Or like Matt?”“Of course we’re worried!” Max exclaimed. It made the brunette gulp at his sudden shout. He wasn’t used to Max raising his voice like that. “We’re all worried Jason! But I, for one, don't want to talk about it. Because there's no point anymore. Do you know how much my parents have talked about it to me? “Warning” me and “protecting” me? I’m just sick of it, that's all.”“Jason,” Kurtis spoke softer. “We’re all very worried about Matt, and what’s to come. Obviously we are. We all love him. Not as much as you, but a lot,” Jason glanced down. “But why don’t we just try and focus on the positives. We’re nearly done with school, and we don't need to be here anymore. And like, aren't you excited to just hang out again? We can still hang out as friends and have fun. We’ll be able to do what we want to do soon, and you can run off with Jason and be all cute and gay together,” the other brunette cracked a small smile as he crossed his arms. “So why don't we focus on the last term and have some fun while we can, okay? We can only be teenagers once, and it’s about to end.”They silently agreed on his words, allowing themselves to show a smile to the world. The very same world that hated them at that point. But they didn’t care. Danny had to be accompanied by Courtney that same morning. Okay, it was mostly Courtney claiming that she had to be there for Danny just in case. To protect him somehow and look out for him. Danny thought that the gesture was cute though.They usually walked to school together, with Roy now accompanying them on the most recent weeks, and it fueled Danny with a sense of nostalgia. It was something he needed. Some people needed coffee in the morning, but Danny needed his friends. He was more confident than he imagined he would be. He wasn’t really that confident, but he was able to get up in the morning swiftly, and he did his usual morning routine like it was second nature. If anything, his mom was more worried about him. She asked numerous times whether he wanted to be dropped off and picked up, and she was worried about all the rumours that might go around but Danny brushed it off with a kind smile and words of reassurance.Truth be told, he wasn’t all that fine with it. But he liked to pretend that he was. “Are you nervous today Danny?” Courtney asked, gripping his hand tightly. He felt like a little kid being taken to school by his mother. “No,” he piped out a lie. “Somewhat excited, really. I’m excited to see all my friends.”“Just focus on the positives today,” Roy grinned over. “There are probably some people that are going to make it difficult for you today. But you’ll make it through, I know it.”He nodded to himself as they approached the school building. He could see it down the road, and it looked much bigger than he once remembered. He always made sure that he would get to school around the same time as his friends and that day was no different. As the trio walked by the entrance of the school, the familiar car pulled up beside them. The window rolled down to reveal Kurtis’s smile and Danny saw a glimpse of Jason’s by the passenger seat.“Hey Danny,” it was like nothing changed. It was like they didn’t ignore each other for two and a half weeks. “Hey guys,” he smiled over. Hiding the resent he had for leaving him alone for a whole week.“We’ll see you later Danny,” both his neighbours gave him a small pat on the back as they split off to their respective groups. Danny felt a little more alone.He didn't hate his friends. Obviously. He still loved them at the end of the day. But all this chaotic shit that was happening was starting to wear down on them. As they entered the building together, they all recounted their story of the last hellish week. It made Danny feel better, knowing that they weren’t purposefully ignoring him, and instead, spending their time away because their families wanted them to. Honestly, the most surprising thing was the parents’ reactions. For just everyone in general. For some reason, they seemed to be all over this huge conspiracy theory over why Matt was gay. Whether it was a problem with the school, his friends, his past, his family life etc.It was a matter of time until they all got brought into the mess too. To get blamed and ridiculed. And they were all hoping that none of that would happen, but the moment they all stepped a single foot into the hallways, they knew that they had been caught.All eyes were on them. Not immediately, but it was like they could “smell the gay off of them” or something. So they would eventually look over and whispers would start to arise. Matt wasn’t with them. It was just the four of them. And yet it felt like all the controversy that was circulating around was because of them.
This was going to be one hell of a day. Like. Literal hell.
***The only word to describe that first day back was hell. Matt never showed up. It was something that Jason was looking forward to, and for him to miss out on it completely broke his spirit. And other than that, well, the day was just a drag. The only questions they all received that day was directed to Matt. From “is he really gay” to “you aren't dating him, are you?”. And of course they ignored most of it as a group, but Danny was honestly on his last nerve because Jay just had to be in most of his classes that day. Oh well. The young boy was able to brush it off when it was lunch time.They were in their secluded area once again, and the peace and quiet made everything so perfect. So amazing. They really needed it. The first half of lunch was just ranting. Plain ranting. Just about all their hassles and everyone being so intrigued by this new story. “It makes me sick that they’re using Matt to create this “interesting story”,” Max would say, and they would all agree. It was true. This scandal thing was also a huge topic between the students, but it seemed like they were more interested in the juicy gossip of it, more than the controversy itself. All the boys didn't know which was better, honestly. “Brian M is here today, and he doesn't know where Matt is either,” Jason explained, staring down at his food. He hadn't touched it at all. “They apparently stopped taking drugs. Well, together from my knowledge.”“Yeah I was talking to him, and he said that he’s just recovering right now with the help of Firkus,”“...you don't think Matt’s moved schools, have you?” Max asked nervously. They all sat there for a moment to let that possibility sink in.“Why would they make him? This is the last term of school for him. Ever,” Danny reasoned.“But they’re rich enough to do it,” Kurtis’s voice was low. “Has anybody got in contact with him lately?”They all shook their heads. “His phone was snatched away, remember?” Jason reminded. “Wait, what did the police do though? Didn't we call them?” Max brought up. “I heard that they did nothing about it. His dad made some ridiculous excuse and Matt went along with it supposedly,” the youngest boy informed. “I know that Matt doesn't want to do anything more to upset his dad.”“Well that’s stupid because nothing’s going to get better with that guy. I know,” Max furrowed his brows. "If Matt genuinely thinks that defending his dad is the right thing to do, he's thinking wrong."They spent the rest of lunch, complaining at the bottomless pit. But they, admittedly, didn't feel any better. Like all this, did eventually, do nothing. Because it meant nothing. They could complain about it all they wanted but it would result in nothing. And that stung like a bitch. That truth.
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
Jason almost forgot what it felt like to get punched in the face. Almost. It was odd, because this was the reality, once upon a time. All he was used to was...this. And then it stopped. For a fairly good amount of time. He looked back on that period of time and dubbed as “heaven”. But now that shit's back again. And it’s gotten worse now with his boyfriend being the main topic of mockery.He never thought that it would be back. But then again, he never imagined Matt being so controversial. So hated. To be so antagonised by the very same people that used to adore him.The brunette slumped his body against the floor of the locker room. He could feel the old rusty showers around him drip water droplets, pounding against the dirty surface. They hit the floor in a pattern he tried to concentrate on. The focusing made his head hurt a little less. He could feel his arms pulse with pain, and he just needed to do something to get his mind off of it. Warm tears pooled by his chin, staining his cheerleading uniform. It felt oddly nostalgic. In the worst way possible. As he tucked his knees underneath his crossed arms, in a way, he could see Danny. That one day. Peering inside nervously as he tried to console him. Not very efficiently. But at that point, Jason just needed anyone. He just needed someone to listen to him. He’s been at those breaking points before, and man, did he feel like he was there again. Maybe even, somehow, lower than it was before.He knew what it was like to be at rock bottom. To feel like there was nothing out there for you anymore. But he never thought that he would be back again to feel this way. Because after Matt and his great friends, everything looked so happy and positive for him. A beam of hope. But that seemed to all go away with a simple Facebook post and too many adults coming into the equation.
“Jason?”
The voice felt familiar, yet not perfectly familiar as he snapped his attention up.“Max?” he piped out in confusion, but his voice was cracked. Blame that on his dry throat. It ached to form words because of his crooked jaw. The tall boy sat next to him, crossing his legs.“Hi,” he awkwardly spoke.“Are you okay?”“What do you think?” the phrase seemed to topple out of his lips like he was meant to. Like it was scripted. “...I’m really sorry for what happened,” he apologised for no reason. Mostly because he felt like he was obliged to. “Sorry that this is the reality.”“I’m sorry that this is the reality too,” he cracked a smile through his blue lips. “But we get to escape it soon and I’m so excited.”That feeling of hope that he expressed through his phrase was wearing thin. As thin as it could get until it was non existent. No. He couldn't hit rock bottom. He didn't like seeing the whole world in grey. To lose the sense of colour and only feel numb. He couldn't be back there again. He just couldn't. So he continued to push through the pain in his body that was weighing him down. “Me too,” Max pressed his lips together to give a minimal smile. “Growing up is scary but...moving onto the future is also pretty cool right?’“Right.”They sat there for a full moment. Only hearing the drip drops of the showers. “...are you worried about Matt?” Jason pursed his lips at his question. “You’re quieter than you usually are.”“Of course I am,” the cheerleader confessed, like he was holding all that in. “He didn't come to school today.”“I’m hoping for the best when it comes to him,” he exhaled deeply. “I’m not too surprised that he didn’t show up today. But I really did wish that he would have come.”“Do you think he’ll come back?” “Hopefully,” he curved around the statement swiftly. “There’s no way to tell, really,” he planted his palms onto his knees, getting up in a heavy manner. “But in the meantime,” he held out a hand for him to take. “There’s no point in worrying, right?” Jason stared at it for a moment before taking it. Kind of confused. “So why don’t we head home? Kurtis is off at photography club but, we can catch the bus home together.”“There aren’t many buses that go over to where I live…” he hopped up, his feet tangling around each other as he stumbled. “That’s ok. You can come over to mine,” he graciously smile. Jason cocked his head to the side. “Actually?” He raises an eyebrow. “Yeah, why not?” He chuckled it off. “I don’t really care what my parents would think anyways.”“Ooh rebellious,” he teased. “And photography club? When did Kurtis join any extracurricular activity?”“Ever since he realised that he had a term left of school which meant that he’d miss out on school clubs,” they both snickered. “I don’t know what happened over the holidays Max, but you’ve changed,” Jason smiled over. “You seem more...confident. Nowadays.”“I think it was a gradual build,” he explained, sounding a tad wise. “I feel better about everything. Especially knowing that I can move on from this place too.”“So things are looking brighter for you?”“A little bit, Yeah,” he grinned. “It’s just a shame that I kind of built this confidence up and we’re close to graduating.”“Well, there’s still a term left,” “That’s true.”Max and Jason hadn’t ever been too close. They had nothing against each other obviously, and it’s not like they disliked each other by any means, but they never had the opportunity to talk just amongst themselves. They’d never been in a class alone, and they’d never had any real reason to hang out by themselves. But it was a nice change. It was just a shame that it happened so late. Jason stayed over at his house until around dinner. Until his parents decided to pick him up. But they seemed to spend the whole afternoon talking and time went by fairly quickly. Max always thought that they would only be friends because of Matt. But even without Matt, they seemed to get on greatly. Jason felt like he was practically getting dragged out of that dark hole. And it was odd to know that Max was the one who was helping him. But he was glad. Really glad. He gave him a small smile as he closed the front door behind him. And Max gave him one too. Maybe he was looking into it too much, but Jason knew that this was a blossoming friendship. A real friendship.
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
The boys realised something. As long as you ignored all the questions, you start to realise that people get bored. Because it was like they were pestering a brick wall. The first few days seemed like an endless shit storm, but by the third day, it got better. Things slowly started to shift back to the usual routines, but maybe a little quieter. Especially for Jason.
“Argh stop tweeting on BitBook Max,”
Lunch had to be the best part of school. It always has been. Regular banter between them returned, and all the petty conversations from before was restored.“It’s not even my fault Kurtis. I don't choose what my character does,” the grey haired boy rolled his eyes, somewhat amused. “And why did you name me after someone on 'Tiny Tower'?”“Because I like the game,” the brunette pouted. “Stop judging me.”“I’m not judging,” they exchanged joking looks.“I am,” Jason chimed in. “Why are you even playing this game? It’s so old!”“Because Tiny Tower is a great game,” he fought childishly. “You’re just mad because you have no skills.”“No way,”“Yes way,” he showed him the screen. “You’re literally the most useless person in this tower.”Danny liked how casual it was. It was childish, and stupid and overall useless, but it kind of meant something to him. That they could talk about something even when there seemed to be nothing to talk about, really.“Why can’t you be more like Danny?” Kurtis continued with the playful argument. “He's maxed out in like three out of five skills.”“Fuck yeah,” the youngest boy rejoiced.
“Are you really still obsessed with Tiny Tower?”
That voice. It was familiar. Too familiar. They all snapped their attention over to them, instantly gasping. In a way, they were like teenage girls. They screamed and squealed, rushing over to him with wide arms. Okay, mostly Jason. But the others were still incredibly excited.“Matt?! Matt! Oh holy Jesus,” Jason cupped his cheeks excitedly, kissing him over and over and over again.“Hey babe,” he muttered through pecks. “Can I say that that was the lamest way to come in? Ever?” Kurtis snickered. “Eh, I wasn’t planning to come in with a bang anyway,” as the couple parted, the group actually got to observe his face properly for the first time.Matt looked different. Actually, different was a light way to put it. Maybe it was all the excitement of his entrance that initially spiked them, so they didn't notice, but now that it brushed away. Well, he looked broken. His skin was pale. Sickly. His limbs stuck out of his dark clothes like a monochrome painting. His under eyes were painted with large blobs of grey, or at least it looked like it. The only colour on his body was the purple grey patches along his body. Conveniently tucked away under his baggy clothes, except the large stain across the right side of his face. It seemed a little older than the rest, the colour slowly being covered up by his skin tone, but it was still visible by the naked eye. “Babe…” Jason was the first to comment on it. He muttered it like he was in disbelief. “...please don't tell me this is because of your dad.”“What is?” “You know what I’m talking about,” he gripped his arms around him again, pulling him into another tight embrace. “Babe you can't go home. You just can't.”“I’m fine,” he mumbled. “I’ve just been really outdoorsy lately. I went on a hike the other day and-”“You’re fooling no one Matt,” Max glanced down. “You can't get anything like that from a hike.”“Not even if I fell down a whole mountain full of trees?” the brunette tried to joke. “Nope,” Kurtis gave a long exhale, his voice painfully unfunny. “Damn,” Matt laughed anyway. It was his way to remain casual.“Come on Matt,” Danny nudged him. “Maybe you should stay at one of ours tonight. Or tell someone. Because this isn't okay.”“My parents would never allow me to,” he explained in a stale manner. “Especially because you’re all guys.”“Does that mean you could stay over with a girl?” the youngest boy asked, receiving a raised eyebrow from every member.“I mean...maybe? I don’t know,”“What about Court? You could maybe stay over at hers,” “Is her family really gonna be fine with me staying over?” Danny didn't answer his question, already knowing that he lost the argument. “I don't think any other family would want me anyway…” before any boy could argue profusely, he cut them off by continuing. “I’m joking by the way. Plus, I’m fine at home.”“No you’re not Matt,” his boyfriend’s state of denial made Jason squirm. “I know you're not. Just let us help you.”“B-But there’s no point,” he snatched himself away. “Seriously guys. You don't know what happened over the holidays. My dad’s…” he pondered for the right word. “Fine...now.”“No he’s not,” Kurtis fought. “I mean, he’s not fine with my sexuality by any means but…” he shook his head. “You guys don’t even know. J-Just let me handle it. I know him the best and it’s going to be okay. I already know it.”“How sure are you?” Jason mumbled over.“Very sure,” all the boys already knew he was lying. He’s always been a great liar. But they didn't really have the motivation to fight him on his own claims. Especially when they lacked the evidence to back up their claims. And Matt was so persistent that it was worth a shot to trust. “W-We’re all going to be here if you ever, and I mean ever, need us,” Max was the one to officially stop the fight with a civil comment. They all silently agreed to sit back down again, reforming that friendly circle they were all so used to. Except this one was a tad tenser.What were you supposed to say in a situation like this. They hadn't talked for two weeks, and the last word they exchanged was Matt’s painful tears before he abruptly cut the call. It was this weird tension. Where they were trying to act like everything was fine, even though that was the furthest from the truth. And they really wished it was the case.Danny just wanted things to go back to the way they were before. For things to be normal again. He missed the way lunches used to be. Where they used to have friendly banter over virtually anything. From class work to music to even stupid phone games. It was something that he loved. That things were stupid but admirably stupid. The fun you can only have when you have teenage friendships. It’s what casted this sepia filter over his life, and now...it was kind of black and white.Matt seemed mostly out of it all of lunch. Like he was kind of falling asleep, but he was just awake enough to nod along. Jason was visually worried, but he was still clinging to his side like always. Looking like nothing had changed. Kurtis was the first to try and speak up, restoring the usual tone of their conversations. “Have you guys finished the english task? Because I tried but I have nothing to write about,” it was something completely irrelevant. Danny was also pretty sure that his statement was a lie. He was fairly confident that Kurtis started it a weekend ago (mostly because he actually did like creative writing). “Well we can write about anything so it’s kind of hard to start,” Max went along with it. And Danny knew that he was lying too. He thought it was a breeze. He was both creative and smart, and he had the freedom to do anything. Max actually really excelled at the task. “Brian M wrote about Stockholm Syndrome,” Jason chimed in with a chuckle.“In 1000 words?” Matt asked. “Wait, that’s a small number of words, right?”“Yes,” Max confirmed. “He’s a really good writer though,” the brunette explained. “I want him to be a writer when he grows up.”“So...homeless?” Danny joked, the others chuckling.“Shut up Danny. You want to be a musician when you grow up Danny,” Kurtis jabbed, the youngest boy bursting out into laughter. The atmosphere was slowly, but surely, growing again to its usual casual feel. Danny was glad. It was a place he could turn to. It wasn't a literal place but...it felt like a place for him. For him to feel loved and comfortable. He watched the boys continue with the stupid conversation about whether you could live on the streets as a writer or not. Smiling on, he pressed his lips together and silently hoped that it would stay like this forever.
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
“We need to talk about Matt,” It was the first Saturday since school went back. Things were basically back to normal, except with the whole Matt thing. Which maybe highlighted how big of a deal it was.“I have no idea how to help him,” They were over at Kurtis’s house, positioned around his sofa. They were circled around the coffee table which balanced their cups of steaming tea and small refreshments. It felt like they were at a fancy meeting. And in a way, it was. Since they were discussing things that does determine really important things.
“I just don’t understand why he wouldn’t dob his dad in. You know we could actually get this guy locked up, right?”
The air between them was oddly dense. It’s been dense before, but not like this. It was a mix of nauseating seriousness and stillness of uncertainty. A really distasteful brew that didn’t quite sit well with any of them. It was probably one of the worst situations they had ever encountered, both as individuals and as a group, but it was the one thing they couldn't do much about. Because it seemed to rest in everyone else’s hands but their own.
“Matt’s not that type of guy...I think. I also think, that no matter how fucked up it is, he kind of still loves his dad. It is his own dad after all, and I’m guessing that they have some sort of relationship they’ve built throughout the years”
Danny silently sipped on his tea, the liquid kind of burning the inside of his mouth, but he didn't really mind the pain too much anyway. It was a tolerable pain, and a pain that he needed to get his mind off of everything.
“I kind of get that, but, Matt needs to realise that it’s damaging him. I feel like we all still have unconditional love for our parents. I mean, they’re our parents. But when they’re ruining our wellbeing...it’s a different story. When we get to that point, our they actually loving us?”
All this deep talk about family and love and whatever was screwing with Danny’s head. He was questioning his own morals. What was right and what was wrong. Because there wasn’t a completely right or wrong answer in this. He imagined what it would’ve been like if his own mom said the same thing to him. If the day he came out, she would've just shoved him back in the closet and said that it was a disgrace. How he would’ve felt and what he would've done. If his own mom, the only person that’s been on his side from the moment he was born, turned against him like that...well he wouldn't know what to do. He’d maybe deny it, make excuses and ultimately fool himself into thinking that he was doing the wrong thing. And that’s when he understood where Matt was coming from.
“I get it,”
They were the first words Danny uttered.“I fully understand what he’s dealing with,” the dark haired boy continued. “I mean, at least for me, my mom’s always been on my side. She’s constantly looking out for my well being and she just wants me to be safe and happy. I wouldn't know what I would do without her.”“Same here,” Jason agreed.“Same,” Max glanced down.“I just thought that they were disappointed in Matt,” Kurtis furrowed his brows. “But maybe they’re also...looking out for him? In a fucked up way. Life’s much harder when you’re gay so maybe they’re a little worried too.”“I mean, imagine being in his dad’s state too. Maybe he’s just confused and doesn't know how to react,” Danny tried to reason. “His dad’s always been a very...firm man,” Max explained. “Very traditional. Likes to enforce traditional gender roles and all that,” he stared down at his cup of tea. “But Matt’s never been like that. “As a kid he’s always been creative. He never liked the usual sports that “boys were supposed to like” and focused more on sketching and art. He was fairly sure that it was knocked out of Matt’s system by now but...I know that’s not true. Because that’s what he truly likes…”“I’ve met his dad on a couple of occasions, and he’s never been an understanding of a man. Or an open minded one. Or a person that likes compromise but…” Jason gulped down his beverage. “I’m, personally, open to the idea that he might change. I feel like he would do that for his son. His only son too.”“So what? We do nothing?” Kurtis asked in confusion, clearly feeling unsatisfied with the conclusion. “Well, there isn’t a specific thing we can do,” Danny informed, a tad disappointed as well. “I wish there was but...the only thing we can do at this point is wait.”“We can support Matt and hope that he gets through his,” Max said in a cheery voice. “That's what we’ll do.”“And that’s all that Matt needs right now, right?” the cheerleader smiled, warming up to the thought of it much more than he did previously. Like he was growing tired of fighting everything so he decided to settle. And he kind of liked settling. “He’ll grow as a person because of it. I know he’s strong enough to get through it all.”Danny doubted a lot of things, but the one thing he didn't doubt was this decision they made as a group. He already knew that this was the best way to approach it. That, at the end of the day, Matt was his own person, and he was strong enough to overcome it himself. There was a fine line between supporting someone and not supporting someone at all. You either support someone, but it may be translated as to not supporting someone because you don’t think they're capable. Or you do nothing because you believe they can do it on their own, but it may be translated into doing nothing because you don't care. He didn’t know how Matt was going to take it. None of them really did. But it seemed like the best thing to do. The only thing to do. The dark haired boy stared at himself through the reflection of his cup. At how sunken in his eyes had become over this and the countless potential futures. That, at the end of the day, he still didn't know what to do. And he would do. And it was keeping him up at night. He observed how his hair began to grow out. From his shortly cut trimmed locks to now his overbearing ones. He didn’t really know which hairstyle he liked more, but he knew which one made him look more miserable. It was the latter. And it was growing out at a time that couldn't be any less ironic and “fitting”, you could say. He gulped down the rest of the liquid to avoid the thought and gazed back at the others.“But let’s try and be positive guys,” he grinned. “It’s still the last year of school for you guys. And I really want you guys to make the most of it. Have the best time.”“Danny’s right,” Kurtis acknowledged. “We should still have a lot of fun while we’re here. Our time’s slowly running out.”Jason exhaled deeply. “I’m going to miss you guys when we leave,” he frowned.“Okay, we’re not over yet,” Max laughed over. He raised his cup a little higher in the air. “To us?”“To us,”“And most specifically Matt.”
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“Babe, you need to stop moving”
It was a warm afternoon. Jason could feel the sun beaming down on his body through the large window of his bedroom. It was starting to heat up his chest comfortingly as he stared out at the outside world.“I can’t help it,” Jason chuckled. His eyes gazed over the cars drifting through the street outside. His fingers lightly grazed the cushions of his sofa. One leg was bent towards his chest, and the other was stretched out. It was a comfortable position, on a comfortable day and he had a comfortable feeling in his chest. It was homey and relaxing. There was nowhere else in the world he would have wanted to be. “I’m trying to sketch you, you know?” he gently chuckled back. Matt. He was positioned by the cheerleader’s bed, a sketchbook resting against his lap. Jason loved the way the pencil sounded against the soft page. It was serene. He was capturing their sepia, idealistic world. “Your face is going to end up looking messed up if you don't stop laughing.”“I hate you Matt,” Jason chuckled lovingly, running one hand through his hair to get his locks out of his eyes. He felt like he could grasp onto the rays of light shining through his room. “I’m kidding,” his eyes glanced over his boyfriend, who’s hand was loosely holding the pencil. “I love you.”“I love you too,” he gazed back up at him with a wide grin. Jason felt his own heart melt at the look. It could make him do anything.There was a certain way you view the world when you were in love. The whole world seemed to glow into a warmer light. Where everything was hazy and it was like he was high, even though he was actually sober. It was indescribable, really. Jason just knew that he loved it. Jason gave a small snicker as he shifted his back against the sofa arm.“Hey Matt,” he spoke over. “What do you want to do after we graduate?”“Well,” he began, his pencil sketching light strokes. “Move out immediately. Go to the city with you, or at least, in that direction. Get a house with my family’s riches. Either go to the same college as you or at least live in the same house with you. Hopefully take an art course or something. See you be happy. All that.”“I like those plans,” Jason grinned over. “Maybe a tad unrealistic?”“No way,” he denied. “I am confident in this happening.”“Really?”“Yes really,” he grinned over. “I believe in us. I believe in this happening.”“Aw babe,” Jason pounced off of the sofa, lunging over at him. Matt toppled backwards, laughing as Jason wrapped his arms around him. He showered him with sweet little kisses as the boy underneath him squirmed from his weak spots. “S-Stop it Jason!” he choked out laughter. “I’m really ticklish.”“I know you are,” he smirked, proceeding to do so anyway. Matt was playfully fighting his advances, lightly pushing him to his side. The younger boy bursted out into laughter as he got pushed onto his back. “Holy Jesus,” he snickered out, planting both hands into the bed beside his head. “I really love you.”“I love you too,” they exchanged a kiss. One that felt like a bed of roses. As Jason’s breath slowly escaped his lips, his eyes fluttered open. The fuzzy feeling by his chest was now gone, and the the warmth escaped his body. He sat by his bed, alone. And the air sat still.The feeling by his lips still lasted though. Where it felt familiar but it wasn’t real enough. He still imagined how that day went down so vividly. But the fact that it played through his mind non stop, along with every single moment with Matt...it killed him. It was like a movie reel consisted of everything he didn’t want to think about at that moment. Just because of how painful it was to reminisce. He stared over at his phone again. He knew that Matt wouldn't reply, and that nothing would happen if he would text him, but he couldn't help but to reach over and unlock it. He scrolled through the countless conversations they had. They used to have. He felt like he took that all for granted. Now that he got all this taken away from him, he realised that talking to Matt every day and being with him so often was an amazing aspect of his life and he should have treasured it more while it was happening. Jason unknowingly pressed the call icon on his phone. Like he was in a trance and he craved it so much that his body instincts just took over.
“Hello?”
He actually answered. Jason blinked in disbelief.“I-It’s Jason,” he stuttered. “Jason?” his voice lowered into a whisper. “I-I have a curfew babe. If my dad comes in here, he’ll take this away from me. I’ll call you in the morning-”“Wait,” he made him halt. “I just need to talk to you.”“Is everything okay?” he yawned, like he just woke up. “Well…” he gulped. “I just miss you...I guess.”“Aw Jason,” he gently chuckled. The sound of his laughter always made him feel better. “I miss you too. It’s just bad timing and-”“P-Please don't go…” he mumbled, barely audible through the phone. “I just need to talk.”“Are you sure there’s nothing wrong?” he worried.“I took you for granted and I’m sorry,”“W-What?” he stammered.“We used to talk so much and now we don't and it makes me realise that you mean so much to me. I mean you always have, but I’m just so empty without you and-”“Jason,” it made him stop his ramblings. “Babe, don't freak out,” he rubbed his eyes and got up slightly. “We don't talk as much anymore because of the circumstances. It’s not like I love you any less. In fact, I actually still really, really love you,” Jason’s bottom lip quivered at his words, making him inhale deeply. “I totally get that you might be worried because I haven't been able to talk lately and I’m sorry for that. I just needed space, you know?”“I get it…” he pressed his lips together. “And I understand. And it’s fine. I want you to have your space and think things over. Sorry that I’m clingy.”“It’s kind of sweet actually,” he smiled. “And I’ve had plenty of time to think things over. And I realised how much I missed you,” they chorused a small chuckle. “I miss being with you so much, I really do. But I just can’t right now.”“I know,” Jason sighed, though he seemed much more satisfied with the answer. “I just wanted to hear your voice.”“I’m glad you called though,” he pressed his back against the wall. “Really glad.”“I should hang up before your dad comes in and steals your phone again,” he pursed his lips. “Goodnight.”“Goodnight. I love you,” “I love you too.”There was a pause, like they both knew to hang up but they couldn't really do it. Jason stared down at his phone and his thumb lingered on the end call icon. He lightly pressed it, slamming his device onto the bed to avoid looking at it. He sunk into his bed, staring up at the ceiling with a sense of comfort. He felt better. Like some sort of conclusion was met. All he wanted to do was talk to him. Even for a few seconds. So he was glad.Man he loved Matt. And he full heartedly believed that that would never change.
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Hey guys! I'll still upload another chapter today (so this isn't technically chapter 100) but since it’s such a special occasion, I wanted to give you the details for the “original Sad Boy”.I obviously had plans for this story before I started writing it, but a few of my original plans were scraped halfway through writing this story. And its for the better, trust me!So this "chapter"’s going to be like a “Behind the Scenes”. It'll include some of the ideas that nearly went into Sad Boy! And they’re infinitely sadder and way more melodramatic than the current story (I know, hard to believe, right?)1. Danny was supposed to be a murderer
Yeah...you’re not reading this wrong. This was a genuine idea I was going to go ahead with. This is definitely not going to happen, but in the original ending, he was supposed to kill Brad off at the very end of the story and kill himself, ending with him by the school fields, hearing the police sirens, and singing the last lyrics he made for Sad Boy. Yeah, really depressing I know. I’m glad I didn’t go ahead with it because it’s incredibly overdramatic and a tad OOC. 2. Courtney was supposed to run away from home
In the very first draft, she was planning to run away with Willam and never look back. She would say her final goodbye to Danny and ride off, but I decided not to go with this plot because I wanted her to successfully finish high school. Yeah I’m looking out for a fictional character’s future, sue me. 3. Roy and Danny weren't supposed to get together until the very end
The slow burn was originally going to be a really slow burn. But it got too much, even for me, so I made them official fairly early on (okay not that early on but earlier than I planned for)4. Kurtis and Max were going to end up together
Well, they still might. I haven’t fully decided on whether they should, and maybe it could be open up to interpretation. I’m honestly deliberating within myself but in the very original version, they were most definitely going to start dating. I guess I decided to back out last minute because I realised that it would become too obvious for all of them to start dating. 5. Max and Danny were going to get together
At one point, I was going to write Danny and Max as a couple, and then let Danny move on to Roy (and they'd become endgame), but then realised I lacked the time and I didn’t see a real point to it. I also realised that readers would have probably hated it if I would have. 6. Jason was meant to die
Yeah...it was meant to be really depressing. Whether he was going to die or not was up to interpretation, but he wasn’t going to make it to graduation at least, and he would stop showing up to school because of something that happens to Matt (but you’ll find out what that is in a future chapter) 7. Danny’s dad was supposed to come back
Not fully. Just come back to actually see Danny for some odd reason. I wanted to build the lack of father figure in his life, and ultimately tell him to piss off anyway because he’s a dickhead, but I realised how useless that was to the plot. I mostly wanted it just for Danny to have a confident sassy moment. 8. Max was going to go see a therapist
It will be referenced that he did in a later chapter, after Danny asked him to in the city trip. But I decided not to dedicate a whole chapter for Max and his therapist because I saw no need. However, I still do want to emphasise the importance of seeking help. That’s what I really wanted explore with this character. 9. Roy had a history of dating Courtney
This will also be referenced in later chapters maybe. I don't know at this point. But I did want to make this a small minor joke for Danny maybe. That his best friend and his boyfriend was originally dating, even though they were both gay. 10. Courtney was going to be Danny’s beard.
I thought it was a really funny idea. In the very beginning, I thought it would be fun for Danny to stay closeted by dating Courtney when he was younger. Maybe I’ll reference it slightly in the future, but maybe not. It was going to be some big thing for him in middle school, but it was so insignificant that no one remembered. Even Courtney. I have a weird sense of humour don't judge me.And these were 10 things that were going to happen, but luckily didn't happen. Sad Boy could've gone in so many different directions, but I’m pretty happy with the way it’s heading now. If you read up until this point, I’m honestly so grateful. I didn't think it would get to this point and have so much support and feedback. I’m glad that people love this as much as I do, and thanks so much for reading this far.
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“So...how do you solve this?”
It was the oddest day. It was the first time they actually spent time as a group since the holidays. Matt’s parents were a little more lenient when it came to him nowadays. Little being the key word. He was actually to enter the outside world now. As long as he was studying. He just had to make sure that he took a picture of his school work every hour and send it to them, to prove that he really was in the library and he wasn’t lying. It was something that he could fake really easily, and he explained that many times to his friends, but all four of them claimed that it was dangerous. That they might as well behave anyway, just in case something went wrong.“Umm,” Max leaned over to view his textbook. “Sub it into the equation.”And Matt wasn't that happy with the outcome. The fact that he actually ended up doing work and catching up on his homework. Well, it wasn’t as bad as he thought it would have been. He’d never had a study group before at the library, and he enjoyed the company. Even though he was struggling.“If the equation is y = 2/x, what kind of graph is that?” Kurtis tapped his pen against his book.“It’s a hyperbola,” Jason instantly brightened. “Wait, I’m right, right?”“Yeah you are,” Max chuckled over.“Fuck yeah, I love maths,” the brunette enthused, squealing in his seat. “What if it’s the power to x?” Matt was still squinting at his page in confusion.“It’s an exponential,” Jason answered him, now overly confident.“Gees Jason, you’re suddenly getting this,” Max joked lightheartedly. “I’m proud of you.”“I’m a maths genius!” he clapped his hands excitedly.“Eh, not really Jason. You still failed your last test,” Danny laughed over, doodling small pictures by the top corner of his page.“Oh shut up Danny,” he pouted. “Okay,” Matt slammed the book shut. “I’m done. My brain’s dead and I can't do this anymore,” he groaned into his page. “Can we go out now?”“Where to?”As they packed up the rest of their things, they deliberated on what to do but ultimately stumbled onto nothing. So they just put Matt in charge by letting him drive, since it was his idea to begin with.And yeah, it was nice. Nothing extravagant. But nice. They bought a smoothie each and snuck into school. It sounded stupid, but they had this weird emotional attachment to where they sat at school. Where the grass was soft and emerald and where the air was always warm and relaxing.“I can’t believe we sat here for 4 years straight,” Jason stretched out his arms and rested his head against the soft grass.“Yeah…” Danny muttered jokingly. The others laughed. “It’s nearly been a year since you started sitting with us,” Max slurped his drink.“What were your first impressions of us?” Kurtis looked over at him and jerked his eyebrows. The younger boy pondered.“Well,” he thought about it for a moment. “I thought Jason was really gay-”“Fucking hell, why?” Jason cried playfully. “Is it that obvious?”“Yes,” all the other four members drew out.“I liked you though,” Danny grinned. “Seriously. You were kind of defensive and lowkey a bitch, but, like, in a good way.”“Ooh, what about me?” Kurtis maneuvered the conversation.“Mmm, you were kind of a dick,” Max nearly spat out his drink at the answer. Especially because the brunette took offence to Danny’s words. In a lighthearted way. “What? One of the first things you talked about was how much of a bitch Kandy was.”“I can be nice though,” he pouted childishly.“Yeah you can, I just realised that after,” Matt was virtually dying from laughter right next to him. And Jason was trying to catch his breath. Kurtis crossed his arms and furrowed his brows. Danny snorted at the mess.“Ok. What about me?” Max asked, his face amused.“I thought you were kind of a stick in the mud,” never mind. The tallest boy now looked pissed off too. “What is that supposed to mean?” the couple was completely losing it at this point.“Because! You acted so posh and uptight,” Danny couldn't help but to burst out into laughter from his own words. “I like you now! Obviously!”“And finally,” Matt snapped his head over to him dramatically. “What about me?”“You were kind of boring,” he said nonchalantly, the delivery making the boy choke.“Actually?” he seemed genuinely surprised.“Yeah. I mean, I thought you were a stoner who didn’t talk much,” he blinked.“Fucking hell. Is that how I come across?” all the boys nodded towards him as answer. “Jesus. I didn't realise,” he stopped and thought for a moment. “I’m fun, right?”“Babe,” Jason chuckled. “You don't need to be so worried.”Matt frowned and glanced down childishly.“Changing the topic then..." Kurtis took over. "Do you remember that time we egged Brad’s house?” Kurtis brought up enthusiastically. “And then we actually got away with it?”“Oh shit,” Danny laughed. “It feels like so long ago! Man, that was one of my favourite moments of the year.”“But what about that city trip? That was the best moment for me,” Max smiled. “We need to go back there after we graduate. Just because we didn't get to do everything we wanted to do.”“That would be so fun! Like a gap year but...for people with no money,” Jason snickered. “Oh, and there was a gay bar there. I mean, we’ve gone to one gay bar, might as well go to another one, right?”“That reminds me,” Matt smiled over to Max. “Did you ever call that guy you were talking to?”Max laughed.“No,” he confessed. “I decided not to. I mean, I’m underage and he would probably be creeped out if he found out about that. And plus, he seemed overbearing anyway.”The other boys cackled.“We’ve accomplished a lot this year, haven't we?” Kurtis knocked himself back onto the grass, placing down his drink beside him.“Yeah, we have,” the former footballer subtly smiled. “By far the most eventful year we have ever had.”“Good or bad?” the youngest boy asked over, maybe a tad nervous for the answer.“Both,” Jason grinned. “It’s been...interesting. But I’m glad we’re still here.”“To us?” Max raised his almost empty plastic cup.“You really love making toasts don't you?” Kurtis laughed over.“Yes. Yes I do,”“To us!”
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ROY: come down to my house
ROY: my parents are out tonight and I have something to show you
ROY: oh and also dress nicely
Danny stared at himself in the mirror. He was excited for what was to come. He didn't know what Roy was plotting at all. But apparently it was formal and special. That's all he knew. The whole thing was intriguing though. And he absolutely loved surprises. He tightened the tie all the way up to his neck and he strengthened out his suit jacket. He hadn't worn it since Max’s performance. Did he ever wash this? He shrugged and trotted downstairs, the excitement virtually too much for his chest to contain it.
DANNY: coming now
He found it kind of funny that he was going right next door looking this fancy. As he shoved his hands into the pockets of his pants he knocked on the door of his house.“Danny?” Roy answered with a huge, kind of goofy smile by his lips like he was overly excited. “Come in.”“What’s this all about…?” his sentence dumbed itself down into a muted mumble when he saw the inside of his house. It was somewhat darkly lit. But Danny could make out a slim path down his hallway, which lead over to the dining room. Candles and fairy lights made up this mystical path that Danny was so intrigued by. He gasped.“Roy,” he melted, his cheeks burning from the joy. He yelped, embracing him excitedly as he jumped up and down. “Aww, this looks amazing!”“You haven't even been inside yet,” he snickered.“I don't care! It looks so special and it looks so romantic and-”“Okay, okay, don't get too excited yet,” he held out a hand, and Danny gladly took it.The older boy lead him down the hallway, and turned the corner towards the dining room. Inside was a warmly lit room, like it was dyed with the colours of love and thoughtfulness. On top of the usually simplistic, wooden table were a range of dishes. All over the top and beautifully garnished. “Maybe I went a little over the top,” Roy laughed, pulling out a chair for Danny to sit on. The dark haired boy just shook his head. He was genuinely speechless and all he could do was gulp. He sat down on the chair and felt his body freeze from shock.“This is…” he began to muttered. “Absolutely. Fucking. Amazing.”Roy bursted out into laughter as he grabbed them two glasses. Champagne ones, that were filled to the top with lemonade. It was festive enough to send a rush through Danny’s body. His feet couldn't stop fidgeting from the excitement. “So what’s the occasion?” Danny asked, taking light sips from his drink. “Just thought that you deserved it,” Roy smirked, raising his glass. “To another amazing year?”He raised his glass up to reply before he took another long sip. “I just thought of doing something special for you, you know?” Roy began digging into the meals he provided for them. They were beautifully decorated food, from small salads to a laid out pasta dish. Danny laughed with wonder as he stared over at the meal. “You’re kind of scaring me Roy,” Danny confessed, raising his fork and knife. “Are you going to tell me you have cancer?”He laughed.“No, I just thought that it would be nice. I mean, my parents are out and I wanted to see you,” he shrugged. “Plus I’ve learnt a couple of cooking tips from Max so, I might as well utilise it, right?”Danny took his first bite and instantly widened his eyes.“Oh shit,” he swallowed. “That’s good.”“Are you that shocked?”“Yes,” he blurted out. “I mean, you weren't ever a bad cook by any means but…”“No, I used to be bad,” he said truthfully. “That's true. I was always a really lazy person. But I kind of enjoy cooking now and I wanted to spoil you.”“Remember that one time, when we were like 8 or something, and we tried to make pizza,” he started an anecdote as he took another mouthful.“And we burnt it?” he chuckled. “Yeah, I do remember that. And we had to call over Courtney so she could make it for us.”“Jesus we were dumb kids,” he laughed. “Still dumb to this day.”“Well...one of us,” he joked, making Danny scoff and gasp overdramatically.“Oh fuck you,” he cackled. “Oh shit, do you remember that time when we actually tried cooking shit from scratch.”“Mmm, and shit ended up tasting, well, really shitty,” he gulped down his drink. “It was fun though. I just remember we ended up making toast because we couldn't make anything else.”They laughed at their memories together. It kind of felt like their stories were endless. It could go on forever because there were so many things that they did together through the years. This friendship, relationship, whatever. Just everything really. Was filled with the endless stories that they made together through the years. If you had asked Danny a year ago how to describe it, he would’ve said amazing. But now, if you asked him, he would say perfect. They'd known each other since they were virtually born, but what made it so unforgettable. What made it so loveable, was the experiences they had together. More notably, the ones they had that year. From the days from the annual ball, to their first kiss to every little conversation they had.It was...indescribable. Really. What they had. Because it was just a cluster fuck of the best things and the worst things. But it was magical for Danny. He loved it. He loved him. “Danny? Are you done?” Roy waved his hand across his face. The dark haired boy snapped back into reality, dabbing his lips with a napkin. He was fairly surprised that he was able to finish all of that. “Yeah,” he smiled widely. “That was amazing. Thanks so much.”“Well, there's one more thing I wanted to do,” he lead him to the other room, gently gliding over him to the living room. “I don't get it Roy,” he pressed his lips together. “You've arranged so many things tonight...it’s been amazing.”“I guess I wanted to live out my romantic fantasy that I always dreamed of and planned for.”And then. Well. Probably the most romantic thing happened. “You take my breath away”. It was a song that always stuck with Danny for some odd reason. It was maybe because it was the song that played in their middle school disco and he used to watch Roy in the far distance, wishing to talk to him. Or maybe it was because it was a song that Courtney used to sing a lot when she was younger. Or maybe it was because the song that they sued for the slow dance at the annual ball. Either way, it always seemed special to him. But not like this.He had his arms draped over Roy’s shoulder loosely, with the older boy’s arms around his waist. It was the slow dance he thought he couldn't ever have. “Hey,” Roy breathed out. “This is the dance I've always wanted to have.”“Me too,” he hugged him tightly. “Except I was too busy fighting with Courtney at the Annual Ball to experience anything like this.”Roy gave a gently chuckle as he gazed up at him with a soft expression.“I love you Danny,” he spoke it in a way that Danny had never heard of. He had heard “i love you”s and all, but not in the soft, romantic, tender way that Roy just uttered. And they’d said hastily rushed “I love you”s before but...this was different. It felt raw. And tingly. And perfect.The way he mumbled it. “I love you too Roy,” he leaned down to kiss him deeply. And a sense of overwhelming accomplishment washed over. Like it all came full circle. The story of Roy and Danny. Everything they went through and everything they were going to go through. It just froze for a moment.It was like the world stood still because they were so perfect that nothing else could function. And that moment, it felt like puzzle pieces clicking together. They parted, Roy gazing deep into his eyes like he was lost for words. Like he was so in awe that he couldn't think of words. But they didn't need words. They both knew exactly what it was. And there weren't any words that could properly describe it.“I don't care what you say Roy, I’m staying over,” Danny gave out an airy giggle. “I don't mind. At all actually,” Roy went in for another kiss. One, borderline rougher, as he pressed up against him. “More like, you better stay. I'm not going to forgive you if you leave.”He hastily removed his jacket, letting it fall onto the ground as he held Danny tighter. Their lips crash together messily as they stumble in an uncoordinated fashion onto the lounge. Danny groaned against his lips, yanking him firmly down by his shirt collar. By the end of the night, both boys were just silent. But the silence you needed when things were just right. Danny laid within his embrace, long breaths escaping his lips he stared into his eyes.“I’m so glad I met you,” he breathed out, still somewhat out of breath.“Me too,” he smiled down at him. “Never leave my side Danny.”“I won't. I won't ever.”
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Matt was tired. That was an easy way to say it. He spent the whole weekend trying to figure out what english was all about. Max was able to give him a few pointers over a video chat, but the taller boy was busy with music and left, which left the older boy apologetic, found himself a burden and also just plain sad for his lack of ability to read. It was around late afternoon, almost night, when his dad called. Matt was fairly busy staring down blankly at his page, wondering why the english language was created, so he was fairly quick to rush downstairs and meet him.His dad was positioned by the kitchen, arm resting against the table and his right hand holding up a glass of liquor by his lips. The first thing that the young boy noticed was the lack of his mom’s presence. That meant that this was serious. She was never here in conversations that required her to fight for herself. Second thing he noticed was his stance. His legs spread out and his feet firmly planted on the ground. Another way to identify its seriousness. He took this stance to keep himself unmoving and unmobile. Strong. Like a wall. Matt tried to keep quiet the whole time as his dad was talking. His voice was hoarse and denser than usual. That was the third thing he noticed. But it was still his usual complaining. It was about how, at the end of the day, he still really cared about Matt and he was looking out for him. Just the way he was looking out for him really wasn't helping him. And then he dropped the bombshell.
“Dad? Come on, you have to be kidding!”
Matt’s voice was growing coarse. And he was growing tired as well. He didn't know what to do anymore. How to fight anymore. Because whatever he was going to say wouldn't ever go through to his dad. He thought that things were getting better. Honestly. He listened to absolutely everything his dad had to say. He reluctantly agreed to everything. He worked hard, he followed every rule and he was sure that things were looking out for him. “It’s the last term of school! You can't just make me transfer schools now!” he threw his arms in the air, angrily stomping his foot into the ground.So he didn't understand why. He couldn't wrap his head around why his dad would be punishing him more than he was previously. Because he was behaving. He was doing everything right. “Don't raise your voice at me!” he roared, his voice echoing throughout the house. “This isn’t a question, this is a statement! A demand!” he gave a heavy sigh. “This is a decision that your mother and I both agreed on. And we think that this is the best option.”Matt just wanted to give up. Just give up all together. He didn't know what to do anymore. He tried everything. He tried rebelling. He tried going along with things but...nothing worked. Somehow absolutely nothing worked. “Can we talk about this?” he pleaded. “Please?” the older man closed his eyes and groaned into his palm, gesturing for him to continue. “It’s the last term of school dad. I feel like I’m missing out on the real “high schooler experience” if I move now. And I’ve been doing so well in school! I’ve done absolutely everything that you asked me to do. I’ve taken up every sport you asked me to, I’ve taken school work seriously, I’ve helped out with your work and I’ve been studying non stop. What more do you want?” Matt already knew from his look that something was wrong. Somehow more wrong than it was before. And then it hit him. Brad. He knew that his dad went over to their house earlier. They’ve always been family friends, but with this recent “dilemma” he seemed to go over there a lot more. So it had to be something related to them, right?“You need to break things off with your friends,”Matt mentally took that in many directions. All he knew that it was Brad’s doings. It was either because of his friends or...Jason. If it was Jason, he was going to throw himself off a bridge. Kind of metaphorically, maybe literally. He didn't care when it just involved himself. Things were fucked up but, nothing. And he meant nothing. Would ever convince him that it was okay to bring his friends into this. He was most definitely going to stand up for them. He didn't want them to get involved. Whatsoever.“Why?” he snapped, regaining more firmness in his voice. “Don't tell me it’s because of something Brad said.”“Maybe they’re not the best influence on you son,” his eyes narrowed. “Especially with that,” don't finish it. Don't finish the sentence. Please. “Jason boy.”He widened his eyes. His chest unfolded itself out, like it was toppling. His voice hitched, but it came out more as a suffocation.“Dad I don’t know what you heard but-”“And I thought you were getting better,” he cut Matt off, clean. “I heard from Brad and his parents. They weren't wrong last time son.”He swallowed down all the tears building up in his chest.“Come on dad, you can’t make me move schools though,” he sniffed. “I really like being here. Dad.”“But I don't know if these boys are a good influence on you. I think you need a break and this school that your mother found,” he slowly dragged a pamphlet over the table. It rubbed against the tabletop, making Matt grit his teeth. “It’s a private school with strong Christian values. It’s a little far away so you have to stay on campus but-”“Dad!” he yelled, sounding more like a cry for help than anything. “If you really loved me you would let me st-”“I do love you son,” he slammed his fist onto the table, making Matt jump backwards. “I’m looking out for you! How can you not see that? This is the best thing for you.”“Why don't you ever ask me what I want?”“Because I know what's best for you, even if you don't realise it.”Matt gulped, his thoughts tangled up in a mess. He slithered in a crooked trail of air before pressing his lips together and dashing away to his room. The only place he could run for comfort at this point. That was it for Matt. He slammed the door shut behind him, pressing his back against the wooden surface. Tears trembled down his face. He needed to escape. He just needed to. There was nothing else he could do. He felt trapped.His eyes darted around the room for ways to just leave. And he didn't have any of that stuff on him. Which meant one thing. He shoved everything he could manage to fit into his bag. From clothes to the piles of money to his phone. As he yanked the window of his bedroom open, the cold air suddenly hit him in the face, sending shivers down his spine. But it was nothing compared to the chills he felt from doing this. He couldn't do this anymore. He propped his foot up against the window sill and jumped. Never looking back.
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
“Tell me, why are you always with me now?”Brian F lowered his mug onto the coffee table and looked over to his...friend? Not-boyfriend? Whoever.“What are you talking about?” he laughed off, proceeding to lean back slightly so his back would press against the sofa. “Ever since the holidays, you've been here,” McCook said, his brows lightly furrowed. “Won't you get claustrophobic?”“Won't you get claustrophobic?” he joked back, but the older boy wasn’t taking it. “What? I thought you liked it when we hung out.”“Of course I do,” he sat up from the couch. “Like, don't get me wrong, I love you and everything. But it doesn't seem like you. You haven't really hung out with anyone else but me. Is there something going on?”That was the last thing Firkus wanted to hear. Mostly because he didn't want to face the truth. Of what was going on in his head.“Do you know everything that’s going on with Matt?” the younger boy asked, his voice a tad low. McCook raised an eyebrow.“What do you mean?” Firkus sometimes forgot that he never used social media. Which was really strange considering he was a kid. But he was never too phased by it and proceeded to ignore most of everything that went on. Plus, his parents weren’t exactly “apart of the community” in anyway. So maybe this boy had completely missed it. Completely missed the part where Matt was kind of going insane and the whole community was going into a frenzy over homosexuality. The younger Brian gave a long sigh.“Forget what I said,” he shrugged off. “No, I want to know now,” he huffed. “Did I miss something?”He mentally debated whether it was a good plan to tell him or not. Wondered if it would do anything damaging. Firkus knew that McCook and Matt’s relationship was...harmful. He hadn't been in many situations where they were alone, so he couldn't commentate on it well, but he knew that, for some reason, the moment they were alone together, things went to shit. Like, really shit. Something to do with deep talks and mental health and shit. And it would drive both boys to escape together, which lead to drugs and all that fuckery. And, admittedly, Firkus was a little scared that his friend would try and console Matt and they would go down that dark path again. Because that's what always happened. He sighed again, and he felt the air graze the bottom of his lungs.“His parents found out that he’s gay,” the older boy widened his eyes at his words. “And they...aren't responding too well with it. And somehow everyone found out about it and it’s becoming this huge thing.”“Oh shit…” Brian M mumbled, barely audible. He sat there for a moment, trying to digest what just happened, what he just got told. But he couldn't. It just rumbled in his stomach. “How’s Matt going?”“Well, what would you expect?” they both gazed at each other for a moment, silently discussing what to do about it. They concluded to jack shit. “Just...don't do anything about it.”“What?” he stammered. “Why not? He's my friend, I obviously want to help.”“Because, you make everything worse,” the other boy halted back from the offence. “I-I mean, it’s not your fault, really but-”“What is that supposed to mean?” he snapped.“Well drugs always get involved whenever you two mix,” he pointed out. “Every single time. And that’s the last thing you both need,” he shuffled closer, his voice growing a little quieter. “Look, I don't want you anywhere near that stuff. That's why I’ve been around you.”“What? You don't think I can look after myself?” he cracked a smile. “Because that's true.”“Come on, I'm trying to be serious here,” he fought with a firm tone. “You promised me last time that you wouldn't do any of it anymore and now look at you. You fucking went back to it,” he continued, his voice growing even stronger. “I want to trust you, okay? But I want you to get better. And I’m leaving soon and what the fuck am I supposed to do? Am I meant to trust you to not do this anymore? Like, do you expect me to be able to do that?”The older boy paused. And frowned lightly.“Sorry…” he glanced down. “I-I’ll stay away from Matt.”“It’s not about actually staying away from Matt,” he shook his head. “I don't want to ruin your friendship obviously but...I'm just scared about what's going to happen. This is probably the worst thing that has ever happened to Matt and…I don't know how to-”“Brian,” he cut him off, leaning close to him. The younger boy blinked in confusion as he lightly pressed his finger underneath his eyes. He didn't even realise that he was crying. “I get it. It’s okay,” he sympathetically gazed at him. “You know I’m trying.”“I know,” he whispered. “I’m sorry for being all pushy.”“No, I understand why. It’s really overwhelming. This whole thing. I know,” he gave a small nod. “I wish everything sorted itself out too. And I’ll put every single bit of effort in recovering and looking after Matt.”They both locked eyes. “Promise?”“Promise. Wholeheartedly.”McCook instantly dived over him, arms messily tangled over him as he sat within his embrace for support. There wasn’t much else he could do to feel better. He just felt so...empty. Before the younger Brian could fully mark a reply, his phone buzzed in his pocket, making the two jolt apart.He picked it up, realising that it was from Max. Odd.“Hello?” he switched it onto speaker so the two of them could listen. “Brian? Is the other Brian there?” he was obviously out of breath. All his words were staccato and his words were frantically coiled together.“I’m here,” McCook answered, eyeing the other boy with slight concern. “What's up Max?”“I-It’s about Matt,” the not-really-official-couple both widened their eyes. “Do you know where he is?”“No. Why? What's wrong?”“He’s missing.”
Fuck.
“W-What?” he stammered. “What do you mean he’s missing?”“He ran away from home, his parents don't know where he is and he contacted no one,” he sounded like he was on the verge of tears. “His parents just called me telling me that Matt took his stuff and ran and they think that he’s with one of us.”“He thinks you know where he is?” Firkus asked, his voice a little agitated.“Well, his dad knows my number so that's why he called. I think, he thinks, we’re all suspects at this point,” he worried. “I just want to know where Matt is. I don't know if he's okay.”“Well he’s not with us,” the younger Brian said, watching the other boy rush out to fetch his phone. His hands crawled across every surface to try and find it as fast as possible. “Maybe he's with Jason?”“I called him first. No use,” he shook his head. “And I really don't think he's lying about it. He bursted out into tears over it and he rushed out of his house, trying to look for him.”“Kurtis?”“He’s currently helping Jason find him. They're driving all across town, to virtually everywhere he could be at. I’m sure that they split apart to cover more ground, but it’s been hours,” the phone trembled against his ear. “I’m just so worried. I don't know where he is and I don't know where he wants to run off to.”“What about Danny?”“Also trying. He said that he was going to tell as many people as he could to try and find him. But apparently no one other than Courtney and Roy have tried because they're still...you know. They still have a thing against Matt,” he bit down on his lower lip. “Do you have any idea who he could be with?”“Wait!” Brian M came scrambling into the room, phone held tightly in his hand. “I might know someone who he might be with.”“Who?” the other two chorused.“O-Our supplier,” he coughed. “There’s a guy we used to buy off of. If none of his friends found him, well, he might be with him.”“It’s worth a shot,”The boy struggled to type the number with his shaking hands. It was the uncertainty of where Matt was that made it so frightening. That they didn't know where he was and what he could've been doing at that time. He might have been in critical danger, but they wouldn't know.
“Hello?”
It was a low manly voice on the other side. It was nothing that the boys could recognise except McCook. “I-It’s me, Brian,” his words shook. The sense of tears clotted in his throat. “I just wanted to ask if you knew where Matt was?”“Oh yeah, he bought off me like a few minutes ago,” he said casually. “The usual?” he gulped when he halted.“Nah, something much harder,” he gave a light chuckle, and it sent a shiver down his spine. “Heroine. The only shit I had on me,” Brian dropped the phone onto his lap, his pupils thinning. Fuck. “I wasn't really planning on giving it to him. I mean, it’s just some left over shit I had at a party but like-”“Were you at the usual place?” he cut him off. “Uh, we were yeah,” his tone spiked a slight tint of confusion. “You wanna buy off of me again?”“Oh nah,” his voice trembled but he tried to sound casual. “I’m just trying to get a hold of Matt. He’s not picking up his phone.”“Oh, gotcha,”“B-Bye.”He stared down at the phone, then snapped over at Firkus. Shaking his head, he crinkled his eyes and lunged over to him.“Max,” the older boy said. “Call Kurtis. Tell him to go around the shops.”“Which ones?” the boy asked through the phone. “The ones around Danny’s area. Not the mall but the smaller ones. There are a few alleyways down there,”“Got it.”He hung up on the boys. As the room finally regained some sort of sense of silence, McCook completely broke down in his arms sobbing softly into his chest. “Everything will be alright…” Firkus said soothingly. “I know it.”“Brian,” McCook stared up at him. “This time...I don't think so.”
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
“I knew you would be here,”
0:49AM in the morning. That's when Jason found him. He was toppled over at their school field, head resting against the grass, and his hair muffled messily. His limbs were overstretched, as he let out a small groan and just froze there.Jason stared at him for a moment, having the urge to lunge over and shake him awake, but he didn't go forth with it. He, instead, lowered himself down to the ground, and sat beside him.Driving around for hours got him the time to think over a lot of shit. He figured out that, after a while, this neighbourhood was way too big to just drive around. It was the middle of the night, and it was virtually impossible to see anything. So he had to think logically for a moment. Max called all of them, saying that some sort of drug deal involving him was going on near the shops. Jason hadn't gone to the shops that often, mostly because he lived near the mall. But he thought about it for a moment. He knew that Danny lived near the shops so he would know the area the most, so he decided to call him.This was all through Jason’s frantically crying mess. Danny told him that he informed virtually everyone in the area but they found no one. So it was like he disappeared off the face of the earth. He was off the radar. Until he realised the one place no one would look for.“It’s a smart place to hide, you know?” Jason continued to talk, even though it was like talking to a brick wall at this point. It was the school grounds. He knew that Danny walked to school, so he had to be near the area. And it was kind of east of the shops, with maybe a half an hour walk. Jason knew Matt well enough to figure out where he would run off to when he was so out of it.His boyfriend was barely responding, just staring up at him with a blank expression. His pupils were tiny, and he looked stone faced. Like he was on the verge of falling asleep, but that’s the last thing that Jason wanted. He instantly dreaded what would happen if he was to pass out.“Babe, we need to go home,”“I-I can’t go home,” he drew out in a messy slur. “Then you’re going over to mine. My parents are out anyway. Don't worry.”After roughly a half an hour debate, Matt reluctantly gave in, and Jason was able to drag him into the car. Literally drag. His legs were numb and wobbly, and his head was so light that he couldn't find his centre of balance.The moment that really made everything sink in was the moment Jason started driving. When he buckled up his seatbelt and headed home. How Matt looked in the passenger seat. Broken. Dead. This wasn’t the Matt he fell in love with. Far from it. His lips were slightly parted, like he kind of wanted to talk but he was so out of it that he couldn't.“W-What the fuck are you doing…?” he sobbed out softly, somewhat under his breath. Matt slowly knocked his head over to him. “You remember what happened last time, right?”“Sorry…” he whispered, trying to crawl his fingers over to him.“But you're not sorry. That's the problem,” he cried, biting his bottom lip so hard, that he swore that it could draw blood. “If you were sorry, you would have stopped. A long time ago. You can't lie and run away from this anymore. I’m not going to allow you to do it.”“You don’t know what its like,” he drew out harshly. “To have a high…” he closed his eyes. “So good...that your senses give out. You feel this rush through your body, and it feels so relaxing. Like the world is swallowing you up and you just melt into it.”“Do you hear yourself talk right now? You sound insane,” he pressed his foot against the accelerator harder, the car jumped forward underneath him. “We’ll talk properly when you’re sober. Obviously you’re not listening at all.”“I am listening,” he groaned. “You're just not getting me.”“There's nothing to get Matt. Why didn't you think any of this through?” he gazed over at him, his sight blurred and foggy. “Why do you always just look past consequences and go ahead to do all this dangerous shit? Life has consequences Matt. You can’t just pretend they don't exist,” Matt glanced away, his bottom lip curled underneath his top. “And you promised. You promised me that you'd stop. You know exactly what the consequences are of doing this. Especially because,” his eyes narrowed. “Heroin? Really? Matt-”“You don't get it,” he shook his head. “You don't know what it’s like. Okay? It’s harder than it looks.”“Do you think that your life isn't worth it? That this stupid high is worth more than your life?” Jason stomped down his foot on the brakes, the car screeching to a halt. He unbuckled his seatbelt, rushing to the other door. As he swung it open, he saw Matt sitting there, his gaze growing cold and missing Jason’s. His hands fidgeted within his lap as he bit down on his lip. “You haven't answered...do you really think that this is worth more than your-?”“Yeah, yeah I do,” he cut him off, slowly transferring his body weight onto his feet. He nudged past Jason in a very slow pace, reaching towards the door knob. Jason stayed quiet. He didn't know what to say. What to believe. He just did everything in his power to keep him safe, and to keep him awake just in case. Not to let him pass out. To make sure that his mind was in the right place. He spread a blanket over his frail body and made sure that he had enough water at all times. Matt was virtually collapsed on his couch, his eyes barely open and his breathing shallow. “How can you feel that way?” Jason mumbled, his hand lightly tracing around his features. “How can you feel like your life isn’t worth it?”Matt’s eyes slowly glided up his face, his blue lips thinning as he rested against his lap.“I don’t know Jason…” his voice was quiet. “I just feel...numb. Empty. And this makes me feel...something.”“Well you make me feel more than something,” he tried to sound cocky, sound like he was so confident in making his point that nothing could stop him but it came out weak and frail. He inhaled deeply and held it there for a second, letting the air circulate around his lungs, before he let it all out in a cry. “You make me feel...amazing Matt,” his tears pitter pattered onto Matt’s nose. “You make me feel special. Like I’m loved. And you have this affect on me...where the world just brightens whenever you’re here. You always used to tell me that things were going to be okay. That things were gonna work out for us and there was nothing to worry about...but,” he held his sleeve to his eyes, collecting the droplets. “I can’t help but to feel like you’re lying. Because you’ve lied about every single other fucking thing Matt. I don't know what to believe anymore. The one person I thought I could trust turns out to be the very last person I should’ve listened to.”Matt’s head rested against the fabric of the sofa as he gazed up at him, his feeling gone. His heart just shattered in his chest, and he could feel the particles jab at him. Like they were trying to pierce the skin. He wished it pierced the skin. He wished that it would be painful. That it hurt so much that it made him cry and scream. Because he deserved it. His hands quivered as he reached towards his cheek, lightly pressing his thumb against his boyfriend’s skin. He longingly gazed at him. He didn't know what to say. What to do. To see his own boyfriend, Jason, just cry like that. To break down like that.He wanted to console him, but it was a whole nother story when you’re the one that was making him cry.“Jason…” he muttered out, his voice hoarse. “I’m sorry I didn’t think…” he felt the warm tears flick off his forehead. “I didn’t think that it would be so…” he pursed his lips. “I’m selfish. I know. I’m sorry. I’m not smart enough to think of the consequences. To think of others…” Jason’s index finger softly collected his tears, ones that he didn’t even notice he was crying. “...I’m sorry for hurting you. I’m sorry for putting you through all of this. I love you. I really, really love you. And I’ll do anything to make you feel better.”The younger boy cupped his cheek.“The only thing that would ever make me feel better is if you start loving yourself,” he frowned. “As much as I love you.”“Jason…” he murmured, trying to sit up slightly. “Can you lie with me?”“Yeah…” he shifted in front of him, feeling Matt’s arm drape across his body. He felt cold. He could feel him shiver against him. He flipped himself around, eyes scanning over his expression. He had pinpoint pupils that never fully matched his. “Are you tired?”“Yeah…” he yawned. “Very.”Jason’s hand pressed against his chest, feeling his heartbeat. Slow. It was depressed. He sympathetically gazed at him, tracing around the fabric of his shirt, making out little patterns. Matt let out a small snicker at it, making his boyfriend snap up.“I love it when you do that,” he gently smiled, letting his eyes shut. “Why?” Jason let himself chuckle at it a little. His finger continued to sketch lightly across his chest. “You're so weird Matt.”“A good weird?” he brought him into his embrace, for him to shuffle closer. “Yeah,” his own eyes shut too, his head resting underneath his chin. Exhaling deeply, the warm air bounced off his neck. “I love you Jason. Don't ever forget that,”“I won’t…” he lightly knocked his head back to take one last, long glimpse at him. “I love you too.”
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
Jason yawned and twisted his head back, stretching out his limbs lazily. The weight of the previous night’s events was still weighing him down heavily, like his body was still going numb from it, so he felt his knees and elbows especially, ache and crack, as he got up slowly from the sofa. He had never been a big fan of sleeping on a sofa, to begin with. But of course he had to stay by Matt’s side to make sure that he was okay.As he slipped out of his embrace in the morning, he had a chance to glance over to him for a second. Matt was a deep sleeper. He always had been. And also a person who loved his sleep. There hadn’t been a day where Jason hadn't woken up before him.“Babe? Wake up,” he lightly chuckled. “It’s like 9 o’clock. We slept in.”His hands grazed past his upper arm as he lightly shook him. Just gentle enough to hope that he’d lightly wake up.“Matt? Our friends are worried sick about you. Maybe we should call them and tell them that you’re alright,” he said in a bright tone, still somewhat lazy and tired, but still happy nonetheless. “Babe?”He shook him again, his grip now stronger. His fingers coiled around his slim arm, as he pushed him back and forth. Matt’s body swung along with his rhythm. In a limping and doll-like manner. Jason widened his eyes.“Matt?! Babe? Wake up!” both hands grabbed onto the boy, shaking him borderline violently. His harsh movement hit Matt around like he was…lifeless. “Matt! Matt?! MATT!”This was probably what it felt like to truly hit rock bottom.Your gaze doesn't move.Your thighs feel weak.And everything dies around you, the moment you look at it.Someone might hold your hand tightly, borderline suffocatingly, but you don’t really feel it until you actually start to think about it. Then you start to realise that your fingers are starting to dye purple. And they can't breathe. Kurtis was sitting next to Jason in the hospital, his arms around him and his fingers comfortingly tracing up and down his shoulders.He didn't realise how he got there.Everything was a blur.The whole world was a blur.Jason tried to chuckle at something. But he felt the action oddly unfamiliar in his chest. Like he forgot how to laugh altogether. But he tried so he could distract himself. Wasn’t it funny that he’d sat in the same seat before in the hospital? Wasn’t it really funny that they had stayed over at the waiting room before and this wasn’t the first time? Wasn’t it the funniest thing in the world, that tears were rolling down his cheeks but he didn’t know how to make them stop? But do you know what the absolute funniest thing was? Out of all of this? The fact that no one said a single word the whole time. They just sat there for a while, sobbing to themselves, only communicating to each other through body contact and language. Jason had a lot of time to stare off into space and to everyone. Kurtis lost the colour in his eyes for maybe the first time ever. They’d known each other for a lifetime, but he had never seen him this broken. Even in the times where his parents left him for virtually no reason. Or they shipped him off to his farm so he had to be in dense isolation for weeks. Or he got told that he wasn’t accepted into his university. It was a different kind of an odd...feeling. To see someone like this. Max was right next to him. His hands covering his face. So long, that Jason almost forgot what he looked like. The only Max he knew was the one with bloodshot eyes and pale skin. The one that looked more shaky and depressed than confident and happy. That glow that he finally achieved had dwindled out now. The most “interesting” one was Danny, probably. Because he didn’t do anything. He just sat there. The droplets of tears staining every bit of clothing, but his expression showing otherwise. His expression was blank like a smooth canvas. Nothing was moving. He didn't twitch. He just gripped onto Max’s hand really tightly, but looked like he was putting no effort into it either. He slowly turned his head over to Jason, their eyes locking. He caught his glimpse. Jason’s gaze was met with Danny’s simple one. It was...white. Boring. Plain. Lacking substance. Paper thin.The youngest boy slowly rose to his feet, dragging his legs behind him as he propped himself up in front of Jason. He stood in front of them, looking like the undead as he opened his lips. “Naloxone,” it was the first word that came out of his lips. His words were coarse like sandstone, but it built some form of substance to the air. “It’s what they use for heroin overdoses. Roy was telling me about it in the car here,” his words were flat. “They give a shot up the arm. If there’s no response. They do it 2 minutes later, and they continue to do it until they reach 10mg.”“And what if it doesn't work?” Kurtis asked, his hands shaking.“Then they use alternative methods,” he lowered himself to meet Jason’s gaze. “Jason, Matt hasn't passed away.”“...yet…” the other boy reluctantly mumbled under his breath.“T-This is what’s going to happen Jason,” his persona started to crack, the surface breaking. His words and stance began to quiver as he swallowed. “The doctors are going to do as much as they can to help. But what it really comes down to is Matt’s fight for it. His body’s going to react in a numerous of different ways. He’s never had this drug before, and he had a lot of it. Now that’s a bad sign but-” Jason cried without the younger boy finishing. “...he’s going to fight. He’s going to make it through this. I know it. He can't just…”“Danny,” Max mumbled down at him, trying to help him sit.“H-He can’t. He can't…” he wailed into his neck, pressing his wet cheeks against his collarbones. “He's not going to...I know it. He can't.”They waited for eternity. Time seemed to tick away, but at the same time, time didn't seem to exist either. Both Brians came in at sometime through the course of the day. It was Firkus’s final goodbye before heading over to the airport to fly back to Wisconsin. What a horrible goodbye. Everyone, at around the 10 hour mark, maybe less maybe more, decided to slowly split off. First was Max, because of the emotional turmoil of waiting wearing down thinly, and his parents disciplinary concerns. They had to literally drag him back into the car, the tall boy trying to crawl back, but failing. Next was Danny. His mom and along with Courtney and Roy were growing incredibly worried for him. He had sat there, emotionless and broken for two whole days. They brought them back to the house to try and warm him of his tremblingly cold body. Second last was Kurtis. On the verge of falling asleep by Jason’s shoulder. It was night again. A time of day that came by too often and too soon. He excused himself out and begged Jason to come with him. That he needed a break. And a long night’s rest and a warm cup of tea. But the young boy refused, shaking his head, muttering a small goodbye and sitting there. By the same waiting room chair, unmoving. That he didn't need to go. Jason knew that the moment he left that seat, everything would crumble. Because he knew that life would go on, and the everything will continue to play on...just without Matt. Life had to go on. But the fact that Matt was going to be wiped clean off the end credits...Jason couldn't comprehend that. He refused to believe it.So he sat there, staring blankly for a couple more hours until his parents came frantically driving in, picking him up and carrying him into the car. He yelled, and screamed, and protested borderline violently. But this was the reality now.
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
His parents call it a “praying period”. Where there was an open invitation to the church, and everyone would gather to commemorate Matt. To commemorate how great of a person he was and how amazing his life was. The boys called it a funeral. Because that’s what it really was.Everyone had different ways of coping. And maybe Matt’s family’s way to cope was to do this. It wasn’t, by definition, a funeral. Matt was still alive. Barely. Borderline living. Mostly a vegetable at this point.But he was breathing. Frozen. But breathingPraying was the only thing they could do. And some people needed to because it was the only place they could turn to. And get “consoled” back. Feel like you were getting listened to. Even though that probably wasn’t the case. Danny sat next to Max in the church, then it was followed by Kurtis and Jason by the edge. On the young boy’s left was Roy, then Courtney and her friends. The grey haired boy had spent the whole morning talking about the effects of Naloxone, something that Danny dubbed as Max's way of coping with what was happening. “If it was given 30-60 minutes after his initial overdose it would be effective,” he would say, but the problem? No one knew exactly when he actually overdosed. Because Jason wasn't fully awake to realise it. It could've been at the very beginning of the night. But it could've been at the very end, and in the morning. No one knew.They sang hymns, and his family members would get up and speak. Like any funeral. Except no casket and no passing. Just a “praying period”. The boys had a strong distaste for that name. It was like he had already passed. The “funeral” was a drag. That sounded insensitive, but then again, this whole service was insensitive. It comprised of Matt’s family, and virtually the whole school, excluding some of the younger kids. It was far too big for it to be properly dedicated for Matt. Danny could imagine him pinching his nose and groaning in his almost-afterlife. And as they talked about what Matt stood for, his likes and dislikes, what he was like as a kid and all this details about his life and identity, and Danny really quickly picked up on the fact that this wasn’t Matt. Who they were describing wasn’t Matt. And it never was Matt. But their fabricated imagination of Matt and what they wanted him to be. They talked about his football career, something that his dad was incredibly proud of. And he apparently was going to be the quarterback before he turned it down because he thought he wasn’t qualified - which was a lie actually. He was too lazy, for one, and anyone who knew him already knew that he wasn’t some amazing athlete either. And football wasn’t what he wanted to do. In fact, he stopped it because he didn’t like it. What he did like more, was Jason. And his friends. Why didn’t they talk about that? They made him out to be this dedicated student who loved school work. Well in reality, he hated school. He hated the students, he hated the teachers, and if you asked him what they covered in history last week, he couldn't have told you (the answer was the Aztecs. Danny vividly remembered Max going on a rant about how overlooked they are and everyone just nodding along with it in complete confusion). He did do something, though, that he did love in classes.Art. They never talked about that in his service. How he drew female characters all over his books. Not because he liked them, but he liked the way they looked. He thought their curves were perfect, plump lips were exquisite and he loved painting them onto Jason. That’s how Violet was born. But was that too sissy for them? Why didn’t they talk about that? And how great he was at his art and how he wanted to become an artist one day? Or how he wanted to move away with Jason to live a happy life, and to be as far away as humanly possible from this fucking shit-ass, rubbish town? Danny felt his hands tremble. They never stopped trembling. And his fingers were going numb now.After the service, they drove back to Kurtis’s. They didn't know why. They just did because they needed the silent support from each other.Max was sat beside him, taking long, painful sips of coke. It was probably a weird site; seeing four teenage boys, all dressed up in dead-black suits, sitting on the front lawn of a house, sipping on glasses of coke that looked like it came straight from a vintage shop. Through those colourful striped straws too. But at this point, Danny couldn't even see what colour his straw was. It just looked grey. Like everything else.It was completely silent between them. It was like they came straight out of a silent film. Those really old ones you only look at during film studies and nothing else because they’re grey, and dark and silent and boring. But at least they have some happy sounding music on top of it. This was just muted. “That funeral…” the first person to speak up was Jason. No one knew when he started talking, or bothered to ask why he started talking, breaking through that thick wall they seemed to build up through the whole day, but no one cared either. The moment they heard some form of sound from the boy, their ears seemed to ring like an alarm. “...it was shit. Complete and utter shit. I don’t even know how to describe it any other way other than, fucking shitty. Motherfucking shithole filled with completely fuckery for who Matt was!”Jason wasn’t screaming like he usually was when he was upset. Danny knew that fact for a while, that Jason, when he was upset or sad, rants. Rants until his lungs give out but this wasn't it. His lungs weren’t ever going to give out because this was from his throat. Like it was crawling up, scratching the sides of his neck as he tried to speak.“I agree,” Kurtis added in, trying to stop him from damaging his voice, and himself, any more than he was. “And I feel like they were missing out on so much of him. His identity and all the fucking amazing things about him that made him...him. The Matt we all loved so much.”“What if…” Danny didn’t notice himself talking either. He lowered his glass onto the grass and shuffled in front of them, breaking that rigid line formation into more of a circle, if anything. “We hold our own little ceremony here? I guess. To remember all the things about him that we knew, that no one else knew, that we loved and appreciated,” he bit down on his lip. “Just as a final goodbye…? Maybe.”There was another silent pause, a lifetime shorter than the last one though.“I’d like that,” Max agreed, clearing his throat and straightening up his jacket. “He meant a lot to me. He really did, and I want to talk about all the things that made me love him so much.”They had a quiet agreement that Kurtis would go first. Something they never actually discussed but something the boy reflected through his actions of shuffling closer and sniffing.“Where should I start…?” he let out a chuckle, that sounded more like a choke. “He was…” he shook his head. “No. I’m not going to talk about what he was like. Because everyone seems to have this view of him that’s different to every other person but...maybe that's what Matt was like? Maybe, one of his best qualities was that...when you were alone with him, he made you feel special. And he’d show a different side to every person. Maybe that shows that he truly wasn’t, at the end of the day, trusting towards other people. And I know I didn't help with that,” he crinkled his eyes shut. “I treated him like shit for so long. And he didn't deserve any bit of that. Because he still, every single day, grinned at me, and went along with the jokes, and supported me no matter what,” he sobbed. “I now get why people say you should treat each day like your last. Because I’m here now...and I realised how many things I might miss out on with Matt. I treated him like shit for the first few years, kind of still now, and I never got to apologise. And I never got to see him smile when he graduated. And I wanted to see him get away from here and be truly happy but...I can’t see any of that.”“Kurtis…” Jason reached over to him, trying to console him. “I’m such a shitty person,” he cried. “I made fun of him once for bragging about doing caps. Now I wish he only did caps. No. Tamer. Not even weed. I wish he didn’t even drink, or smoke, or do anything. I can’t help but to think that I...I contributed to this stupid fucking mess. I could've done something other than fucking messing with him and now...I can't do anything about my mistakes.”The brunette curled up over his lap, wailing into his hands as he let out every single emotion that was building internally. Max gently patted his back, letting him fully gush out every single speck of misery in his body.“Do you want to go next Max?” Danny looked over at him and he received a small nod“I’ve called him a lot of things,” his voice wavered for a moment. “Stupid. Stoner. A drunk,” he spat out with regret. “And before you all think I’m about to drop that stereotypical ‘ ...but most of all, he was my best friend’ bullshit,” the others flinched at his wording. The grey haired boy’s hands tightened to a fist. “I’m not going to. Why? Because I would rather talk about the happiest and darkest moments of him. With no sugar coated toppings because...I’m pretty sure it’s too late to change our order.”“Max...are you…?” Kurtis mumbled over, receiving a nod. “...okay…?”“I called him a horrible liar. But he really wasn't. He was lying about the fact that he was okay this whole time...and we all somehow fell for it,” he managed to speak out. "....maybe he was the one cut out for theatre,” his attempt at a joke hurt his chest. “From the moment I met Matt I knew he was special. It’s stereotypical, but its true. He viewed the world differently and he had a completely different background to mine. That’s what I loved about him. He was so...interesting. Different. And he was someone I was glad to call a friend,” he pressed his lips together, but they seemed to fold themselves over. “...a best friend. A truly close friend. Sometimes, you like your friends because you compliment each other. Sometimes you do because you like each other’s company. I liked Matt because he made me a better person without trying. And he let me experience things that I would have never been able to experience without him. I’m going to be eternally grateful. For his life and him as a person. I loved him with my whole heart...more than that. If that was even possible,” he gave a long exhale, shaking his head slightly as he looked over at Danny. “Do you want to go?”The youngest boy gulped and shuffled forward a little. Danny couldn’t hate Matt forever. Or any of them forever. He’d said that from the very beginning. But he couldn’t help but to feel like hating him forever. For leaving him alone. For leaving all of them alone. Especially Jason.“Umm...Matt,” it was a weak opener, but he couldn't manage to think up of anything else. “...I haven't know him as long as you guys,” he swallowed. “But. But he was still an important person to me. At first I thought he was just some jock. A person that fitted in and was popular. He was someone I was jealous of. He was so likeable and he was chill, and he had his shit together. And he was the person that I wanted to be. For a long time. And then I started talking to him,” he nodded slightly. “And he would talk about art, and how much he hated english,” the others snickered. “And family life. Movies. School work. Music. And his love for you guys. That’s when...he became a person. He became a person that was likeable, but for all the reasons I didn't know about. I learnt what he was like and...well, he was someone I admired dearly. But not because of his surface appearance and what he showed to the world but because of the person he was underneath all that,” he locked eyes with each member as they nodded back to him. “If his dad’s going to spend the rest of his life being bitter, and sad, and upset about him and his identity, so be it, I’m going to spend the rest of my life being happy for who he was, his identity and what he stood for because I want to live the life he never got to live.”
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
“Jason…” Danny mumbled over, his gaze falling onto the trembling boy. He gave a small nod as a reply, as he propped up his coke bottle next to him and shuffled forward.“Yeah, I’ll go,” he mumbled, his stare never meeting anyone else’s. “I...don’t know what to say though,” he pressed his lips together. “You know what it feels like…? When you have so much to say so you can’t get anything out…? It feels like that,” he paused to take a breath. “I love Matt. A lot. There aren't words to describe how much I love him. Or...that's what I thought.”“What do you mean?” Kurtis couldn't help but to blurt out.“I’m confused with my own feelings, which sounds really stupid. I don’t know if I loved him so much that I became an enabler, or I didn't love him enough so I became an enabler,” he sniffed.“Come on Jason. Don’t tell yourself that,”“But I allowed him to do it for so long. In my head, I thought everything was going to be okay forever. Because Matt and I were perfect. And that was enough, but I’m obviously an idiot and I was wrong,” he spat at himself. “Matt used to tell me that everything was going to be absolutely perfect. Everything was going to be okay, as long as we were okay. And that we were okay. But we weren't. We thought we were perfect. There's a difference between thinking it and being it, and I didn't realise it,” he choked on his own words. “Maybe...we weren't made for each other like I thought. Maybe we were actually...harmful for each other. Then I have to ask myself again, if he does make it out of this, if I love him enough. If I truly love him, do I let him go or should I never let him go? Is it not loving him enough if I want him to stay?”“That’s something you only know Jason,” Max mumbled over, sympathy swimming through his veins. “You know yourself well enough to make a good decision.”“But do I? I’m fucking confused…” he groaned. “People say that things happen for a reason. Because you learn a lesson. And there’s some shitty lesson that comes out of it. But why did it have to be this? If God fucking exists, I want him to burn and scream in pain. Because this world was so fucking shitty that he had to escape and he hurt himself in the process,” his brows knitted together tightly as he heavily sighed. “If I could tell Matt one more thing, it would be that I love him, and I’m sorry.”“Jason, you shouldn't be sorry for-”“I can't help but to feel like this is my fucking fault. I could've done something. Should've done something,” he cried. “And now my whole world’s been taken away,” his breath squeaked as he stared down at his lap. “I-I don't want to live anymore.”“Jason, please, please don't say that,” Kurtis crawled over to him, trying to huddle his hands over his to warm them. “You're going to make it through this. So is Matt. Just don’t...say things like that Jason.”“Why can’t I?!”“Because we care about you!” he yelled back, just as much force in his words. There was a pause in the air. That stood still for a moment. Jason quickly sat up, storming off with his hands stuck in his pockets.“Wait Jason!” Kurtis stumbled to his feet, reaching over to him. The other two boys followed. “Where are you going?”“Home,” he grumbled. “I’ll walk you home,” the brunette hassled. “Just leave me alone.”Max wrapped his hands around Kurtis’s arm, yanking him back and shaking his head. Like he was gesturing him to just leave him.The boys watched him storm down street, turning a sharp left to then disappear. “Why’d you stop me Max?!” Kurtis gritted his teeth“Because we should give him space,” the taller boy fought. “Jason needs space from us. He probably needs to think over things by himself and he doesn't need us harassing him all the time.”“We’re not harassing him! We’re trying to help him!” Kurtis teared up. “He’s fucking taking this horribly Max! Did you hear what he said?!”“Jason says things like that in the beginning but he waters down to reality eventually. He always does this,” he tried to sound calm. “Trust me Kurtis. He’s going to be okay. He’ll eventually snap out of it. He just needs space and time to think things over.”“But this is Matt we’re talking about! You know how important Matt is to Jason,” he bit down on his bottom lip. “...I just don’t know how he’s going to deal with all of this. I mean, imagine if Matt actually doesn't make it out of this.”Max paused to let that thought sink in. He inhaled a shaky breath like he was on the verge of tears again. “W-Wait Max I'm sorry I-”He choked a little, like his throat was suffocating him before Danny stepped in.“It’s going to be really hard for all of us Kurtis. We shouldn't think about that,” the dark haired boy narrowed his eyes. “This day’s been hard enough and I think we should stop thinking about all of this. It’s just really...overwhelming. This whole thing,”“I agree,” Max backed him up. “Maybe...we should all go home. Maybe we need some space to think over things too.”Danny didn't really know what to do when he arrived home. The suit stuck to his skin like hot glue, and his trousers were stained with blotches of sweat and tears. He immediately chucked his jacket, or more like throw viciously towards the couch, as he groaned into his hands. He felt lost. Like he was swimming in a sea of pitch black.He stared down at his hands. His complexion looked grey. And he didn’t know how. He tried to stretch out his fingers, hoping that he could get blood flowing through them. He yelped. The sudden buzz of his pocket caught him off guard.
COURTNEY: hey Danny
COURTNEY: can you come over to Roy’s?
He gave a long sigh as he made his way over to the next house down. It just felt...like a drag. Everything felt like a drag. He couldn't be bothered to do things anymore. He just wanted to sit down on his bed, stare into space, and let himself sink into the universe. He was tired. He wanted to disappear.
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
His knock by the door was aloof. It was like a weasel. It was wimpy and soft.Roy was the one who opened it, and he looked towards him with an expression of sympathy.“Hey Danny…” he was still in his not-funeral attire. Not-funeral. That's what Danny dubbed it but he didn't even like it. He didn't want to name it anything. “Do you wanna come in?”He lead him inside. He forgot what the room looked like when it wasn’t dimly lit. Courtney was sitting by the lounge room, her hands clasped over her lap and her look forcefully cheerful. Danny hated that look. He knew that she only put this face on when she was feeling bad for Danny. It was the motherly role face. “Sorry for calling you so suddenly Danny,” the blonde placed a hand onto his knee, and the warmth of her palm made Danny uncomfortable. “We just saw Kurtis’s car pull up to your house and…”“We just wanted to talk,” Roy finished off for her. “Do you need a drink?” Danny shook his head. “Okay…” he rubbed the back of his neck as he exchanged a few looks with Courtney. “I don't know how to start this…”“Danny,” Courtney took over. “We wanted to see if you were okay. Make sure you were still taking care of yourself and-”“I am,” he cut off. “Why wouldn't I be?”“We’re just worried. That's all,” the other boy reassured. “Well, you shouldn't be because I’m fine,” he said stiffly. He felt like he was obliged to suck up to them, even though they were his best friends. For that moment, it kind of felt like they were strangers. Like they were grown ups and Danny was just some little kid. So he had to lie and act stiffly to them. He shook his head at the thought.“Danny, we’re here for you. We’re always here for you. If you ever need to talk we’re-” Courtney tried to console him but the dark haired boy shoved her advances aside.“I know,” he spat, making the girl cringe. “I know. I get it. But I’m fine and I just want to go home.”“Okay Danny…” Roy muttered, looking over to Courtney for some form of support. “...just know that we’re here for you.”“We just don’t want you to react badly,” the cheerleader awkwardly worded. “Like, this is a very hard thing to go through Danny. And we just wanted to make sure that you were feeling okay and-”“React badly?” he forcefully laughed. “What is that even supposed to mean?!”“L-Like not eating enough, or feeling really down or-”“One of my best friends is dying Court!” that was the first time Danny had said it like that. Actually sound it out. It was...hard. The way it slipped from his lips but still made his chest burn from guilt and realisation. “...w-what do you expect? I’m going to feel…”“It’ll be okay,” Roy wrapped his arms around him, pulling him into a tight embrace. Fuck. That’s when Danny broke down. Completely. Like all that grey, ashy feeling started gushing out of his lips and he couldn't help but to cave in. He felt Courtney hassle next to him, her hands running along his back. “I’ll get you some water.”Courtney brought him into his arms, slowly guiding him to the sofa so he could have a lie down. It felt...different. To cry. Then and there. It should have made him feel better. But it didn’t. It just felt like it was the byproduct of everything that happened. And Danny knew why.It’s because crying wasn’t going to bring Matt back. It wasn’t going to wake him up. It wasn’t going to make him healthy again. And it wasn’t going to fix anything that happened because of his overdose. They say that you don’t realise how good something is until it’s gone. And this...made Danny think a lot. It made him think of every single little moment with Matt. From the very beginning to the last time they met. He had so many moments to stop him. To help him. To do something. But he didn’t.He felt incredibly guilty for not doing anything. If he told anyone, they would’ve said that he had nothing to do with it, but he couldn't help but to feel like he was useless. He could have done something. Danny closed his eyes and imagined himself at the mall. Ages and ages ago. And he saw Matt, a spoon between his lips, as he grinned. They were eating ice cream at the mall. That same day, they got a dress for Violet. And he was telling an anecdote about how Kurtis crashed the car and he laughed at it.
“There were boys worse than…” Matt rolled his eyes. “You know,” past Danny exhaled in acknowledgement. “If he ever saw the four of us, we wouldn’t see the end of the word “fag”. The group together…”
The more he remembered his words, the more he realised that there was something behind those words. At first, he just saw that he was frustrated. Mildly angry and upset. But now, with everything that had unfolded...he knew that he was hiding all the real pain behind it. That, maybe through his whole life, he had gone through shit. The bullies and the people may have changed, but the pain still lingered. And it never got any less painful.
“...we’re like walking punching bags. Except covered in glitter and fluro coloured with a sign saying “I’m a bottom”,” past Danny snickered. “The inner gay seems to peek out when we’re a group.”
He joked at the end. And that was it for Danny that day. All the signs floated under his radar. But...things were wrong. Matt could laugh, and joke and roll his eyes like he didn’t care but he did, at the end of the day. And Danny fell for his act. Everyone did. He could've said something. If he could go back, he would have. Maybe something short and simple would’ve worked. Maybe just saying anything would’ve worked. Danny wouldn't know. It’s too late.
“If you ever need to talk Matt, I’m here for you.”
It could’ve been that easy. He could’ve said a single line, and maybe Matt would have told him something. Or told someone. And maybe he would have felt better. In an alternate universe, Danny would have said something. He was hoping, that in that universe, Matt was alive, awake and healthy. He was hoping that he was happier in that universe and the five of them were slurping their smoothies and laughing by then. It was odd to think about all the possible futures and everything that could have happened. That things may have turned out better or even worse. Before he knew it, a glass of water was held by his lips and Roy shifted himself into his gaze. He felt Courtney’s index finger press against his cheek, collecting a tear drop running down. He sniffed, and cleared his throat.“Sorry...about that,” he sipped his water.“Don't apologise about anything Danny,” the older boy reassured. “I feel like you need to talk Danny. It might make you feel better,” she supported. “If you ever need to talk Danny, I’m here for you,” the words that Danny was meant to say. “We’re here for you.”His voice hitched.“I don't know what to do,” he tried to press his lips together. “I just...don’t know. What are you supposed to do when something like this happens? No one tells you what it’s going to be like! No one fucking tells me how I’m supposed to deal with shitty things like this...I-I don't know what to do. I just know that I feel shitty, and everything looks grey and I feel all numb and I can’t do anything to fix it.”The other two gazed over at him, their lips parted and their looks sympathetic.“Oh Danny…” Courtney hugged him again. “It sucks. I know. But sometimes, you have to figure it out on your own. Because we can’t tell you what to do. None of us can. It’s something that, sadly, you have to figure out. You’ll find what feels good to you. It’s a self discovery Danny.”“But that doesn't mean we’re not going to be here to support you,” Roy reassured. “I know absolutely everything sucks right now, but things will be alright. I promise you. Wholeheartedly,” Danny looked over to him, his spirits crushed, and staring over at him like it was the final blink of hope. “There’s a reason why people say that things get better. I promise that things will, definitely, get better. Just hold on tight, and go with what you feel like you need to do. Go with your gut Danny. Believe in yourself.”The younger boy eased into a small chuckle. A very small one. But one that was much needed.He collapsed a little more into Courtney’s embrace and let himself crack a minimal grin.“Thanks guys.”
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
You could call this place hell. Or purgatory. Or just some sort of prison. But everyone just called it school.It was surprising how much people started caring about Matt the moment he was gone. The main gossip reverted back to him, but instead of the anger-fueled, frustration that they used to view him with, it was now fueled with pity and sadness. No guilt. But pity.Danny wondered why no one blamed themselves. It was odd. Because maybe as individuals they didn’t do much, but as a collective, they did a lot. It was one of the main reasons why Matt...ended up like this.“Hey Danny…” Jay spoke over to him in science. “...sorry. About what happened.”It was the first time he had apologised. Properly like this. He seemed genuinely regretful and looked as if he felt bad for him.“It’s okay Jay,” he pulled a very minimal grin. “I saw...at the funeral…?” he was trying to hint at something, but felt bad for directing addressing it. “You looked...frustrated. A little bit. At the ceremony.”“I just didn’t like how his parents were handling it,” Danny found himself opening up a little more. Well, he was his best friend, once upon a time. “It was insensitive to Matt and it didn't represent what he was really like.”“His dad was a huge issue for him, wasn't he?” he received a nod. “Well, I don't know Matt very well, but maybe it’s because that’s the only way his dad knows how to approach him. Maybe they didn't have that great of a relationship, so he didn't really know what to do when something like this happened.”“Then why would he hold that stupid funeral-like thing like that?”“Maybe because he needed support, not only for Matt but also himself? Maybe? I don't really know him or Matt at all and I’m probably just rambling but, I’ve seen him before. He seems like a guy who doesn't like to show vulnerability,”Danny blinked in slight awe.“Thanks Jay…” he considered his point of view a little more than he did previously. “You made some good points.”“Yeah, I do that,” the younger boy rolled his eyes, but chuckled. He forgot that Jay could be likable and nice sometimes. He brushed it aside that year, but realised then that maybe he shouldn't have. They had been friends for years before and it made him self reflect on whether he treated him right.He thought about it for the rest of the day, especially at lunch. It was the three of them. Jason was gone. They didn't know where and they didn't know what was happening. They just knew that he wasn't at school again, from their knowledge. Unless he was just sitting somewhere else at lunch that day. And it was infinitely quieter. Kurtis was agitated, still. To a point where he looked admittedly frustrated. Max was nibbling on his lunch, swallowing hard at the awkwardness.“Where’s Jason?” Danny decided to ask. It wasn't really a conversation starter. He just wanted to know. “Beats me,” Kurtis grumbled. “He might be at school. I don't know.”“I haven't had a class with him today so I don't know either,” Max mumbled. “I hope he's here.”“I think he’s just thinking over everything. Questioning his morals and all that,” the brunette stared down at his lap. “And I don't blame him. I mean, I don't know what I would do if I was in a toxic relationship.”“I wouldn't say it’s a toxic relationship,” Danny corrected. “It had problems. Kind of big problems. But we need to also think of the environment.”“Yeah,” Max agreed. “If we weren’t in a place like this, maybe they wouldn't have problems like this.”“Maybe. I guess we’ll never know…” Kurtis pursed his lips. “Does anyone know how Matt’s going in the hospital?”“Actually, sort of,” the other two glanced over at Max with surprise. “His mom called me the other day. It was really odd actually.”“His mom?” Danny questioned.“Yeah. She told me Matt’s state,” he sighed. “He’s not conscious,” before the other two could react, he continued. “But. He’s alive. As of now, he’s in a coma.”“Why didn't you fucking tell us this earlier?!” Kurtis snapped, half from joy and half from anger. “I didn't know how to bring it up,” he frowned. “Plus, I wanted to tell everyone at the same time. But...Jason isn't here so.”“I’ll text him right now,” the brunette whipped out his phone and typed frantically. “Do you think we could go and see him?” the youngest boy asked, somewhat desperately. “Maybe. I hope so,” he clasped his hands together. “I wanted to ask his mom, but I just felt bad if I pressured her. She seemed oddly agitated and a little frightened. Maybe she had a falling out with his dad?”“I wouldn't be too surprised honestly…” the young boy pursed his lips. “I just hope that Matt is going to be okay.”The three boys immediately snapped over to Kurtis’s buzzing phone. The brunette stared at it before answering it.“Hello?” “Is it true?!” it was Jason on the other side, sounding like he was on the verge of tears. “Is Matt fine?”“Well,” Kurtis tapped it onto speaker phone. “‘Fine’ might not be the right word for it but…”“He’s not conscious but he’s okay,” Max cut him off, looking over to Kurtis with a faint grin. “Okay enough to still be alive and breathing.”“That's all I needed to hear,” Jason abruptly cut the call, making the other boys wince at the beeping.“What the fuck was that all about?” Danny snapped. “I don’t know…” the brunette shoved his phone back into his pocket. “But I think something good’s gonna rise from this. ”“Do you guys want to go see him this afternoon? Or at least attempt it maybe?” Max suggested. “I mean, we never know. We might be able to see him.”“I don't know if I want to see him…” Danny confessed. “Just seeing him unconscious and not moving...that scares me.”“That’s okay Danny. It was just a suggestion anyway. Honestly, we could just wait until Matt recovers fully-”“No,” Kurtis cut him off. “I’m going to go see him,” he faced him somewhat firmly. “Do you want to come with me?”Max gulped.“S-Sure,” he agreed weakly. “Are you sure you don't want to go see him Danny?”“Yeah...I’m sure,”“You always have time to change your mind, okay?”Danny nodded over to him, already knowing full heartedly that he wouldn’t change his mind.
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
“Hey Matt,”They didn't know what was harder, actually saying it for the first time in forever or saying it when they knew they weren’t going to get a reply. Either way, it was hard to say. Kurtis and Max did go see him that afternoon. Bringing nothing with them but the hope that he might be able to hear everything and he might hopefully wake up. That tiny speck of hope was honestly enough for them to make the effort to come. Face their fears and whatnot. Kurtis gently pulled out a chair for both of them to sit. Instead of facing directly over to Matt, they decided to position themselves around Matt. Like he was included in their conversations in a way. It made this whole thing feel more normal. Because it was like "three friends hanging out". Not really but...it felt like it...?“Hey Matt, how are you doing?” Kurtis started, not knowing how to actually start a conversation properly. Max eyed him in confusion, but allowed him to continue. “I-I know that you're not going to say anything. Or do anything really but…” he gulped. “I heard somewhere that sometimes, when you’re in comas, you can hear what’s going on around you. So, I’m hoping that that’s kind of happening for you…?”The silence got the better of them, and it made Max, in particular, nervous.“Uhh, you haven't missed out on much Matt,” the taller boy started, his fingers fumbling around with the fabric of his pants. Just because the anxiety was making him fidgety. “I think everyone’s over the whole gay thing,” Kurtis snapped over to him and shook his head angrily but mostly dumbfoundedly. “I mean...uhh. Forget that I said that.”“Very smooth Max,” Kurtis rolled his eyes.“Oh shut up Kurtis,” he grumbled. “I’m trying, okay?” he glanced away. “I just...don’t know. What to say. What to do. It’s not in my comfort zone,” the brunette didn't seem to quite make up an answer to go along with the other boy’s statements. “I’m only good at things that I’m used to.”“T-That’s not true Max,” he gulped, Max’s guilt making him feel guilty. He rose from his position on the chair and walked over to him, leaning down towards his ear. “You’re not doing anything wrong,” he whispered over, his hand cupping his lips. “Come on. Let’s do this for Matt.”The grey haired boy peered up at him and gave him a little nod.“Maybe we can watch something? There’s a TV right there,” Max pointed over to the far wall. Kurtis turned on the device and began to switch through the channels.“These channels are shit though,” he mindlessly flicked through. “Gross. I hate the news.”“Why? The news keeps you up to date with things,” Max explained, lightheartedly chuckling.“Things like…?” “Things that affect the world Kurtis,” he snickered jokingly. They just decided to watch some old movie that was running again. You can tell how bad it was just by looking at the quality of the camera. They’d speak over to Matt sometimes in somewhat close-ended question, but didn't exactly wait for an answer...for fairly obvious reasons. After a while, it became a lot more comfortable and pleasant. Like they were trying to cheer him up in a way. Or they were looking after him when he was sick. The only different was that he wasn’t responding verbally. But as long as they knew that he was conscious and alive, they were okay with it. Baby steps.Even though Danny still refused to see Matt, they somewhat made a habit out of it. Just Kurtis and Max. They’d see him at least two times a week. Or, at least, enough times for the workers at the hospital to start recognising them. Some of the nurses starting dubbing them as some of the nicest friends, just because they’d visit him so often. But they were having fun with it. Being able to see him virtually every day meant something to them. Just the fact that he was slowly getting better, even though it wasn’t too obvious, and that they could see him was enough for them.They’d never actually run into Jason there. He started going to school again, and slowly but surely starting sitting with them too. But every odd lunch he’d just sit by himself somewhere where nobody could find him, just so he had time to cry. It wasn’t...a pleasant time. To say the least. Jason was admittedly feeling a little lonely himself, but he just didn't know how to deal with it. Every single waking moment, actually even when he was sleeping, was virtually dedicated to thinking of Matt. He needed closure. He really needed closure.
That's why he went.
Actually facing his fears like that was an indescribable sort of pain. The type of agony that tugged at your heart. They say that comas slowly progress into actual consciousness. Unless it went the opposite way then…He held a bouquet, made entirely out of violets - shit. He always had to make things about him, didn’t he? Argh. He groaned at himself for it. He hated himself at this point. He was so sure that he could do this. He was so sure that he was able to walk in and see him and it would be okay. And yet here he was, his hand hovering above the knob, unable to do a simple task. Unable to just grip onto it, twist, and thrust forward.
It’s for Matt.
He fought through forcefully and lunged himself into the room, the blinding light of the whiteley painted walls reflecting into his eyes. His own boyfriend, best friend, was lying in front of him. He gently propped up the bouquet into a vase. It was strangely familiar to walk in. But it still felt surreal. And he didn't like it.A chair was already positioned by his bed. Probably meant that Kurtis and Max had been there that day. Jason lightly lowered his hand onto the bed, feeling how old it was. Hoping that the coolness would wake him up just a little bit.Because it felt like a dream. It felt like all of that was a lie. And it was unreal. That Jason was going to wake up eventually and Matt would be by his side. And they were going to be okay.It was going to be okay.Jason could vividly imagined Matt opening his eyes then. Every moment now. He would wake up, they'd embrace and share a kiss. “Matt…” Jason muttered, knowing there would be no reply. But he needed to say it for his own comfort. “I’m sorry I took so long to come...I was just too scared.”He sighed. “Too scared to come and see you. Because I didn't really want to face reality. To live on and know that you weren’t doing okay. That you were here and…” he sniffed and cleared his throat.“I’m sorry...for everything. Not just being here by your side, when you’re working your heart out to keep yourself alive but, just letting you do that to yourself. It’s just...I don't know. It feels like I was doing the wrong thing. I wish I supported you more and if I truly loved you, I would’ve stopped you,” he gripped onto his hand tightly.
Please wake up please. He needed to wake up. He needed to grip onto Jason's hand.
“I don’t know if you’re actually listening. Or you can hear me. Or anything like that but...I love you. I just wish you were here. With me. Like properly here. I miss you like crazy, and I don’t know what I’m going to do with myself if you’re like this forever. It’s been two weeks and I’m going insane.”Matt wanted to grip back too. Jason’s words were echoing through his body and he just wanted to wake up. Matt could feel his words pulsing through his body as he mumbled......"I miss you too..."
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
Matt was alive. He was alive. He knew in his mind that he was alive. He just didn't know how to wake up.He felt trapped in his little world. Well, “world” being his current reality. The only reality he seemed to know. He was sure that it would’ve grown on him or something like that but it really didn't.It felt, cold. In there. In his world.A blinding white light surrounded him. It felt like eternal bleeding internally. And he could hear the outside world echoing through him. Like it was bouncing off of the walls keeping him trapped. But the words weren't fully clear. No. They were muffled. It kind of felt like his legs were bent beneath him, and he was hugging himself to keep warmth in his body. That's how he imagined himself. He always heard the faintest sounds in his world. He could hear far off conversations between Kurtis and Max. He didn't know whether they were real or not, but they felt familiar. With the usual banter, maybe on the friendlier side than what was considered normal. But maybe it was how they interacted when Matt wasn’t there. It felt like he was secretly listening to their conversations in a way.And sometimes he would hear music faintly playing. Or some stupid TV show. It was something that he found kind of entertaining. Even though his world was so cold. It sounded like a badly signalled version of the shows. He couldn't make out exactly what it was. Even the songs were unrecognisable. But hearing something was nice. It buzzed through his body, and made him hum along with the tune that he couldn't quite recognise. It was kind of like being stuck underground. With bricks surrounding you and there’s only darkness lurking behind you. Like sewers or something like that. So you decide to continue walking forward, towards the blinding light but it seemed to never get closer. But it seemed like the only way to go, really.Sometimes Matt imagined his friends being there. He wanted to have them right with him so he didn't feel so alone. He could still feel the outside world. Very faintly now, like he was losing himself in that tunnel, but still somewhat. How soft or coarse people's hands were against his own. How the breeze felt when they decided to open the windows. He could even faintly smell the fragrance of violets now. he still had his senses. They were just...muted down. A little. Being in a world where it was just you and your thoughts was hard to explain. Because you felt trapped, but it also felt oddly comforting. Because you knew that it was your own mind, which meant that you had control. Eh, maybe subconscious control wasn't the best but...it was your control. Sometimes you feel like you need time to think things over by yourself. To think through everything that was bothering you. And you could say that this was an “unconventional” way to think things over. But hey, in a way, you had all the time in the world to think things over. And Matt had to be true to himself (for once maybe), he really did have a lot of time to think. When he was alone in his head. And he finally seemed to undered himself a little more. It was odd to think that this was the way he handled it. But he had no other choice. It was like he was subconsciously stopping himself from waking up. Because he knew that he couldn't avoid thinking over things in his life for any longer. He basically interpreted the situation as a wake-up call from his body. Like his subconscious was yelling, "Sort this thing out cunt."But he was thankful, to some extent, for it. You could say that he learnt about himself more. And he was able to know himself as a person more. Like grow as a person and learn shit or something like that. He was obviously an idiot for doing the shit he did, and he should’ve found another way to escape. He realised that when it was much too late. He still beat himself up for that. Another thing that he realised was the importance of life. You truly realise how important things are when you’re on the verge of death. When life can slip from the bottom of your feet at any time. How important it was to just be...alive. To see the shit you can see and experience the things you could.Because the more he thought, the more he wanted to cry.He finally realised all the little things that actually meant a lot for him. All the little moments with his friends, to every sketch that he breathed life into, and even to the bottles of coke that he drank down. Life wasn’t some big event; it was a whole lot of miniature events that came together to form a cohesive story. And you only truly realise that when you finally accept where you’re at, and find a goal for where you want to go. You don't live forever; that’s a given, but Matt realised this, wholeheartedly and truly, when he was on the brink of death. Everything was going to end, and he was a single step away from that end. That's when he realised that he took everything for granted and he felt his heart heat up with true pain and agony. Maybe a little frustration too. For himself.Light blinded his eyes as he shut them. He could feel a grip around his hand. A strong yet gentle grip. He wanted to scream. Scream as the light became too much. The way it flashed could give him a headache.He clutched onto himself, feeling like he was truly dissolving. Like he was getting torn apart into pieces and he was falling into the depths of light until-…until...Matt blinked.His eyes squinted, crusty tears weighing down on his eyelids. He let out a groan between his lips, a low, painful one. He could feel his body ache. Every inch. As he slowly, but surely, started to wriggle them. His index finger.His middle finger.His ring finger.Until he could grip back on that clutch. Until he could hold back the hand holding his. “Matt?” his mom shrieked. He forgot how loud voices could actually be. How crystal clear and prim they could sound. “M-Matt? Are you awake?”He forgot what it felt like to be held within an embrace. A tight embrace. And the sound of crying other than his own. Or the way tears felt against his shoulder. And the strong scent of cleanliness in hospitals. Or the look of warm brightness.His body trembled with a new boost of life.“Son…” his dad mouthed beside him, bringing him in tightly into his chest. He felt how fast his heart was beating, and how heavy his breathing was. Tears pitter-pattered onto his forehead.That’s when he experienced something different. That’s when he truly realised what unconditional family love felt like.He could feel himself cry too. It was brewed in with a sense of thankfulness and gladness. How thankful and glad he was to breathe another breath and live another moment. His breath was shaky and buzzed with a sense of unfamiliarity. But he was happy. He was so happy. “I’m…” Words toppled from his lips for the first time in forever.“I’m home…”
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
The waiting room never felt this nerve wracking. Really hard to believe, yes, but this wait. This long, long wait. Was different. It was basically waiting for the one thing you were praying and begging for. It was the thing you wanted so, so badly and finally getting it. The only thing you needed to do was...wait.“Jason,” Kurtis whispered over to him, holding onto his hand tightly. “Are you nervous? Or excited? Or-?”“Kurtis,” Max snapped over to him. “Don’t freak him out.”“I just want to see him already,” Danny held his breath. “I feel like I’m going to suffocate in here.”“He’ll be out soo-”
And there he was.
It was odd, because they had seen him before many times, obviously. And seen him look, well, a lot better than this. The way he looked then. And yet, it still felt like this was the best he ever looked. Just because he was conscious. And breathing. And alive. Jason was the first person to lunge over to him, wrapping his arms around him borderline suffocatingly. He cried into his neck, or more like screamed. Screamed until his lungs gave out. But they would never really give out. He was just so...happy.Pure happiness was a particular type of feeling. It felt bubbly in your chest and it would hurt so much but in a good way. It was the type of pain that would make you want to cry. Cry and cry and clutch onto yourself. Jason stared down at him in almost denial. The awe in his eyes dyeing everything into a rosy tint. His boyfriend was strapped to a wheelchair. He looked frail. He looked pale and his eyes were dark. But the smile on his face was enough for Jason to feel like never letting him go.He felt arms surround him. Not from Matt but from his other friends. Warmth trapped within the entanglement of limbs. If you asked any of them to describe the moment, they would say “messy”. But a perfect type of messy. A very perfect type of messy.Everyone was crying, and tears were splashing all over the place. And words were tumbling from their lips like they were supposed to mean something but it didn't sound like it. They were all saying some sort of pleas of thankfulness to cries of joy but no words were actually clear enough to prompt a reply. And yet, with all these tears and sweat and emotions and all this fuck-ton of crying...everything was so perfect. So amazing. “I hate you Matt. I really, really fucking hate you,” Kurtis wailed out, clutching onto him firmly. “So fucking much, you have no idea.”“Thanks Kurtis,” Matt tried to grin back, holding back the tears of pure happiness. “And thanks for coming. Not just today but all the other days.”“Wait you heard-?” Max asked in confusion.“Yeah. Faintly but...yeah,” Matt muttered. “It was weird. Scary. But mostly weird…” he shook his head. “I’m just thankful. To be here. I’m never, ever leaving. Ever again.”“When are you leaving the hospital?” Danny asked in concern.“In a couple of days. I’ll be back in school as soon as possible,” he explained. “I probably missed out on a lot.”“We only have a couple of weeks left of school anyway,” Max dismissed with a chuckle. “And you didn't miss out on much. Trust me.”They spent the rest of the afternoon together. In the confinements of the hospital, but hey, at least they had this small outside area so they could be alone and talk things through. They just talked about everything, and in a way, nothing at all. Just school, drama, and stupid things that were going around in class. “It sucks that I couldn't say bye to Firkus though,” Matt sighed. “What if I never see him again?”“Doubt it. He’ll get married to McCook or some shit and we’ll be invited to their wedding,” Kurtis laughed off. “Are they officially dating?” Max asked over.“I don't think they'll ever be “official”,” Jason said with an amused grin. “But it’s as real as it would ever be.”They all lightly chuckled at it. “Okay, I need to head off to the bathroom,” Kurtis quickly dismissed himself, shoving his hands into his pockets casually. “A-Actually me too,” Max stammered, slipping away swiftly. “S-Same?” The youngest boy raised an eyebrow and shuffled his feet over to them. Then there was the two of them. It hadn’t ever been that awkward. Ever. It was just...stiff between them. Like they never met before. It kind of felt like that actually. “Hey,” the boy in wheelchair faced over to him with a small grin. “I’m Matt.”Jason looked over to him, confused, as he stared down at the hand between them. “Umm…?” he took it a little limply. “Jason…”“You sounded exactly like that when we first met, you know?” The brunette chuckled amusingly. “A little awkward, stiff, and you couldn’t look me in the eyes.”“Oh shut up,” Jason rolled his eyes. “Why’d you do that anyways?”“Because,” he faced away from him, his gaze stretched over the landscape in front of them. “I feel like...we should start things over.”Jason stood still. “Why’s that?” he slowly lowered a hand onto the back of the chair. “Because,” he pursed his lips. “I screwed things over with you and I want to start from scratch. Forget everything and just…” he sighed. “Reset maybe.”“Matt…” he muttered over. “I don’t want to forget everything. I mean…” he felt his chest sink. “Things have been tough between us and...I hated you, well, wanted to hate you, a couple of times but at the end of the day, we had a lot of good times as well. And there are so many times I don’t want to forget,” he shifted himself in front of his gaze. “We’ve gone through shit Matt, but I wouldn’t want to take everything back and restart because we’ve gone through shit. That’s the whole point. And yeah, our relationship has probably been harder than other relationships but hey,” he shrugged. “That’s us. This is the life we met in and I still love you.”“Really?” He blurted out. “After everything I put you through?”“Well you wouldn’t be my Matt if you weren’t so difficult,” he chuckled. “I guess it shows that we have shit to work on. And I’m willing to work hard to keep this relationship going.”“Jason…” he whispered over, pulling him in tightly into a fulfilling and satisfying kiss. The one that made him completely melt into bliss. The one that he had missed and craved for so long. “Oh Jesus slap me, this feels unreal. I don’t deserve this. You know that right?”“I think you deserve a second chance and I honestly think things are gonna work out for us,” he grinned back, feeling his cheeks warm. “We’re gonna be happy Matt. We really will be.”"I missed you so, so much, you have no idea," he gushed. "I had a lot of time to think things over. To just rethink everything that was going on and..." he shook his head. "Now I know for sure that I want to be with you. And that, this," he gestured towards the space between them. "This is meant to happen. This is amazing and you're amazing and I love you. There's no one else I'd rather be with."
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
Matt was virtually recovering amazingly. Borderline miraculously. There were probably a million reasons as to why, but Matt liked to think that it was the motivation he got from his friends. The fact that they visited and helped him with everything. Just the emotional support alone was enough for him to feel better. But add onto that the extra work that they provided him, the help they provided with absolutely everything and the gifts was just...nice. Really really nice. It was the last day before he got to leave the hospital. Matt liked the place and everything, and the staff was pretty nice, but he really was getting bored of the facility. He wanted to get out and see the world again. Go home and enter his bed again to feel the familiarity of it. And to go back to school and sit by the fields with his friends. He just missed the routine he used to have.“You look a little disheartened,” Jason whispered over, a slightly amused grin by his lips. They were by the hospital garden. The small, pleasant feeling one situated by the very end of the hospital. Jason liked to slowly stroll around with Matt around the area. Ever since he got out of the wheelchair. Actually, even while he was in the wheelchair, he’d wheel him around and take him anywhere he needed to go. Jason liked the feeling of helping him and Matt liked the company.“I just want to get out of here,” Matt sighed, crossing his arms.“Well, you have a few hours to go,” Jason smiled over. “What do you want to do when you get out of here?”“Just walk around and see things,” he muttered. “Go back to school and hang out with you guys. It’s really nice that you guys come and see me, but I feel bad. I just want to hang out like we usually do.”“You shouldn't feel bad. We come here because we love you and we want to make sure that you’re okay. Plus, we missed you,” he chuckled. “Me especially.”
“Matthew?”
They both flipped their attentions over to the source of the feminine voice. Jason gulped a little at who it was. He felt his cheeks redden from his embarrassment.“Dear? Do you want to go back inside? It’s getting colder,” the two boys exchanged small looks. “U-Unless you’re busy then-”“Actually,” Matt interjected. “There's something I want to say,” he slowly made his way over to his mom. “Where’s dad?”“He’s waiting in the hallway,” she explained with slight confusion. “Should I get him?”“Y-Yeah, yeah can you?” Matt’s legs stiffened a little from the nerves. His boyfriend shifted his view over to him, his eyebrows raised and his lips parted. “Should I go?” Jason asked quietly, watching his dad come out into the open area. “No,” he held onto his hand tightly. Jason tried to squirm out of his grip, feeling the dense stare of Matt’s dad digging through his skin. “Stay.”He swallowed. Hard.And he glanced over to the older man again to try and wipe his expression clean. It didn't...really work. He looked just as nervous and agitated as before.“Son,” Jason never understood why he never said proper ‘hello’s. He just said weird introductions and it made the air so much weirder. “Jason.”The way he said his name rubbed the brunette the wrong way. It sounded coarse and awkward. “T-There's someone I want you to meet. Properly,” Matt gently guided Jason in front of him, the cheerleader stumbling. His legs seemed to give out slightly, somehow molding into jelly, as he tried to find his balance. “This,” Jason couldn't even look into his eyes. “This is Jason.”“I’m sure we’ve met,” his voice was low and hoarse. “But nice to see you again Jason.”“Y-You too Mr. Lent,” he cleared his throat awkwardly.Matt sighed deeply, feeling the urge to fidget with his hands. He lightly pressed himself forward, holding Jason up with a gentle nudge. His palms pressed against his shoulders as he held him in a tight embrace. The younger boy gasped slightly at the action, more like a yelp really, as he tried to stand confidently. Even with Matt’s arm around him in front of his homophobic parents. “But he’s not just a friend,” Matt explained, regaining colour onto his face. “He’s my…” he looked towards Jason with a grin. A grin that convinced Jason that anything was possible. A sudden thought rushed through him. It was what Matt knew now, confidently, after his recovery. That life wasn't going to last forever so he needed to gain happiness. Like now.Which meant that maybe...he needed to take risks. But not the harmful risks. The risks that would make him happy in the long run. Like the risk he was just about to take. And Jason knew where he was coming, full heartedly, just from the look in his eyes. The blue shade had basically seen it all, and Jason knew it. So he confidently gazed back at him, feeling a lot more steady in his grasp. “Boyfriend. Jason’s my boyfriend.”There was a gulp of silence for a moment. It was enough for his parents to digest it. To take it in and understand it.The first to respond was Matt’s dad. He nodded stiffly, his hands clenching into fists for a moment as he let out a long and heavy sigh.He looked towards his son, then at Jason and then pressed his lips together into a straight line.“Well…” he mumbled, coughing. “Nice to finally meet you properly Jason.”He placed a hand between them, like an awkward cue for a handshake. Jason gazed down at it, his eyes wide with shock. His quivering hands reached for it as he gripped it as firmly as he could have.
A hand shake with Matt’s dad. It meant a lot to him.
“You too...sir…” he lowered his head a little. “You seem like a very nice boy Jason,” his mom smiled over, the sense of her acceptance making Jason fluster. “Do you have any plans after high school?”Jason was a fan of small talk. It made the atmosphere so much better and it let him breathe a little. “I’m planning to go a college out of town,” Jason grinned over. “I got accepted into one near the city, actually. I’m doing a fashion managing and marketing program which I’m really excited about.”His mom smiled.“That sounds really interesting Jason,” she enthused. “Matty’s a lot less organised than you.”“Mom,” Matt slurred jokingly.“What? It’s true dear,” she giggled. “At least you’ll have Jason with you to straighten you out.”“True,” the younger brunette laughed under his breath, making Matt pout.“Not true,” he fought pettily. “I’m super organised.”“Okay, that’s pushing it,” even his dad chimed in with the banter, making Matt huff playfully.“Yeah Matt, you’re one of the worst procrastinators I’ve met,” Jason cackled.Matt couldn't help but to laugh. That admiring sort of laugh you do when you’re truly happy with the moment. And maybe life in general. His gaze roamed from his parents to Jason, who were all laughing along with some light hearted banter.He never ever thought, in a million years, that things would be this amazing. That he was able to introduce Jason and for everything to run so smoothly. He was thanking his friends and him for that. And maybe, oddly enough, the fucked up shit that happened.Things did work out in the end. You just needed push through and fight for it. And Matt knew that for sure now.“Matthew will be out in a couple of hours. Do you think you’ll stay around?” his mom asked over to Jason. “Umm yeah. I think I will,” he replied. “Great. Would you like to come over to our place for dinner?”Jason froze and tried to contain his excitement.“I-I would absolutely love to.”
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
“What rhymes with pain?”
“Maybe like ‘windowpane’. You know, for that line about rain,”
Danny knew that things were getting closer and closer to the end. Kind of a sad conclusion. But hey, all good things had to come to an end. This meant that he kind of wanted to take the opportunity to build relationships again. To say his final goodbyes. That’s why he wanted to see Sharon. “Sorry for making you help me out with this,” It was a relatively warm afternoon. They were sat in a musical classroom after school. She was slowly but surely helping him out with song lyrics to a song he never got to finish. A song that he had been writing for years now.“It’s fine. I’m good at writing depressing shit anyway.”It was weird to look over the lyrics he once wrote. How hard things once were and how much he grew from everything that happened. He was so grateful that life wasn’t that depressing and shitty anymore. “You’ve gone through shit this year, didn't you Danny?” she asked over, peering down at his notebook. “Yeah, yeah I did,” he sighed. “But I’m happy. This year’s been shitty but...there’s also been good shit too. I guess I learnt a lot about myself.”“You excited about the future?”“Oh shit yeah,” she laughed at his answer. “I wanna get out of here.”“Same,” she slurred. “I mean, I’ve never been that big of a fan of anyone in my grade anyway. Except ‘Lasky obviously.”“Relatable,” Danny chimed.“But they say that high school’s like the prologue of your life. Even if everyone hates you, it sets you up for life, or something,” she shrugged. “I think I appreciate high school now...or a little more at least, now that I get to leave it.”“How?” Danny chuckled. “This place is so shitty and we learn about useless shit endlessly.”“Maybe the shit we learn about isn’t great, but we still get important skills, I guess. Like, it’s not about how we learn about trigonometry and physics or whatever but about how we learn to talk to others and shit? Work with people we don't like and learn about time management and work ethic or something,” she shrugged. “Skills you learn at high school don't come from the work, but it comes from working hard through shit...I think.”Danny hummed.“Yeah...I see that,” he mumbled hoarsely. “I guess it’s something you learn as you mature and shit. I mean I wouldn't ever live out high school again but…” she glanced down and stretched out a small grin.“I’m glad I went through it I guess,” she chuckled. “What about you Danny? Are you ready to stick it out another year?”He chuckled.“I...don’t know,” he rubbed his neck. “I was thinking of dropping out and running off or something but…” he didn't fully meet her gaze. “I had to mature a lot this year. With my friends and everything that happened,” he bit down on his lip. “I think I might want one more year of being a kid. You know, to truly grow up and find myself or something.”Sharon shrugged“Fair enough,” she hummed. “I can't blame you for thinking that. I mean, we have the rest of our lives to be adults. No real point of starting early, right?”“Yeah...yeah I guess we so…” he froze in his seat for a moment. The first thing that popped into his mind was Roy. The agreement they made and all the plans they had. Danny shook his head.“T-Thanks for helping me out with this song by the way,” Danny smiled over. “And this talk...I think I needed it.”“No worries Danny,” she smirked. “You’re kind of an amusing kid.”“What do you mean?”“You’re gonna go far. I can see it,” she messed up his hair with her hand. “You really think so?” he peered up at her with a kid-like expression. One filled with wonder and hope.“Yeah. Definitely,” she swung her bag over her shoulder and hopped to her feet. “I should get going but…” she gave one last look at the boy. One that felt like it was going to be never ending. “Thanks Danny. I had one hell of a year with you.”"You too Sharon. Not just in the musical but...just in general. I mean, you helped me overcome a fear of singing in front of people so..."The older girl laughed."Have fun Danny. I'll see you around."Those words settled in his veins as he stared down at his page. His heart thumped with motivation as he grabbed his pen and jotted down his feelings.
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
“Why not?”
Danny was over at Roy’s house. It was some afternoon. Sipping on some flavour of tea. Danny just felt bad. Everything else didn't really matter. “I-I mean, don’t get me wrong Danny, I want you to do what you want to do but…”He felt selfish for changing his mind so suddenly. But then again, he probably shouldn't have made up his mind so quickly to begin with. “I thought we had a plan,” The look in Roy’s eyes is what killed Danny the most. He looked so sad. The way his eyes lost colour and his lips parted into a slight frown.“We did. We did and I loved it but…” Danny’s breath was shaky. “The more I see people graduating...the more I’m wondering if I can do that,” he lowered his mug onto the table in front of him. “I want to be a kid for a little bit longer. I don't think I had the opportunity to grow up properly.""I get that...yeah..." Roy's gaze was down. Danny gulped. "I think that I need to grow as a person and find myself first and…” he chewed on the insides of his cheeks. “Maybe that’s what makes you a real adult? I think...and well...I don’t think I’ve reached that point yet.”Danny didn't have the heart to look into his eyes. He couldn't just shoot up a gaze and look confident. He couldn't.He slowly took a breath in and out. And then slowly raised his gaze.To his surprise, Roy was smiling. But it was a meak smile like it was forceful. Danny didn't expect any better. Well, maybe this was the best he was ever going to get. Because it was wrong of Danny to drop out last minute. To just completely abandon the plan they had for so long. And he did feel bad. he really did. “I understand,” he began. “I get it completely, actually.”They sat there for a moment, with Danny stunned and Roy unmoving. “Are you sure though? Your friends aren’t going to be here anymore and you have to sit back with Jay and Gia,” the older boy explained in a low voice. “I know. But I think it’s called people skills or something...you know, to sit with them and get along with them,” he replied calmly. “If it’s because you don't think you're strong enough to move on…”“Its not that.”Roy sighed deeply.“I’m just...confused,” he admitted. “I just don't think I know myself as well as I thought I did,” he confessed. “A lot of shit went down this year and it makes me feel like I have a lot more self discovery to do,” the more Danny spoke, the less Roy sat up. “All of my friends went through shit this year and they were able to find themselves so maybe I should do the same,” he tightened the grip around his hands. “I think I owe myself some closure,” he cleared his throat. “And I want you to chase your own dream Roy. Without me.”Roy snapped up in confusion. That look in his eyes scratched against Danny's heart. “What do you mean without you?” he scoffed. “You're apart of my dream Danny.”The younger brunette’s heart tugged at the comment.“Yeah, but we’re individuals at the end of the day,” he cried. “I don't know...” he halted for a second. “Seeing the whole Jason and Matt thing made me think a lot,” he mustered up the courage to look him in the eyes. “I love you with all my heart Roy but knowing that I love you means that I might have to let you go so you can follow your dreams…Just for a little bit,” his nose crinkled. “Just so we can both find ourselves”Roy’s sigh filled up the room with a sense of stillness.“You’ve always been so smart Danny,” he muttered, the air escaping his lips thinly. “I just don’t get why…” he paused so he could glance away. “It has to hurt so much for me to say it.”Danny’s voice hitched.“I-It doesn't mean we’re over it just means that I can't move out with you,” he reassured poorly. “This sounds super stupid, but I want to graduate high school and say that I made it. Say that I stuck through and fought everything even though life hasn't been the easiest for me.”His pleads made Roy glance up at him. Shaking his head slightly, he let out a chuckle.“That's the Danny I fell in love with,” he teared up a little to say it, but it felt so satisfying by his lips. “The one that puts up a fight and never gives up.”Danny instantly lunged over to him, kissing him deeply. Planting both palms into his back, he pulled him into an embrace that he hoped would last forever.He loved him. He really did. And everything about that day was painful for him, but he knew that it was for the best. The best for both of them. “Hey Danny,” as they parted, Roy gazed longingly into his eyes. “I love you so much. Don't forget that. Ever.”“I love you too…”
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
Max hands were drenched in water. His milkshake was virtually melting in his hands from the heat.“Jesus, it’s so hot today, isn’t it?” Matt spoke over to him.They were resting by the school fields, milkshake in hand, as they relived their childhood for maybe the last time.Max could still imagine the first time they’d done this. Not at this school in particular, but at a park near Max’s old house. They had a cafe near that old park, which was much better than the one they went to now.Little Matty would always get the chocolate one. It was one that tasted like nostalgia and diabetes. Max could retell that story many times. Everything they used to talk about. From class to stupid things they watched on TV. He could even still taste the vanilla milkshake by his lips. Well, he was also sipping on some at that point.He still remembered how much he used to like Matt. The way his heart thumped when he placed a hand onto his shoulder and smiled. Smiled in a way that could make anyone fall in love with him. And it totally worked on him for years.“We’ve come so far, haven’t we?” Max talked over to him, a straw dangling between his lips.The brunette looked over to him and shrugged casually.“Yeah I guess,” he chuckled. “Are you referring to the day we met? How much we’ve changed since then?”“Of course,” he swirled around the cool liquid in his tall paper cup. “I still remember what 7-year old Matty looked like.”The brunette laughed.“What? With my shitty ass hairstyle and babyface?” he joked.“You used to look adorable! What are you talking about?” he flushed a little redder. That previous feeling for Matt feeling hot by his cheeks. And oddly tingly. “Especially in those jeans you used to wear with that leather jacket.”“The leather jacket was super cringy and it was back in my tryhard days,” he laughed off. “I only stick to hoodies now.”“With stains on them?” Max mocked his clothing lightly. “I hope Jason knows how to do laundry because you've always been a messy kid.”“Am not,” he pouted. “Are to,”Max felt like he was a ten year old again. With the taste of his milkshake still by his tongue. And Matt looking childlike again with his round blue eyes and shortly cut hair. Max shook his head.
We’re not going to recreate what happened with Danny.
“Hey guess what,” it was nearly the end for them. The end of high school. Which meant that Max got to take a few more risks, in a way. And well, this was a huge risk for Max. “I used to have a crush on you...you know?”His voice was much clearer than he ever imagined it to be. Well, he never thought that he would tell him. Period. In a million years. So really, saying it altogether was a massive step compared to what he expected.The brunette blinked towards him in pure confusion, until it melted away into a laugh.“Why didn't you tell me?”Max scoffed. “I thought you knew!” he argued, feeling a snicker by his lips too. Maybe Kurtis was right. About moving on and little crushes and all that. “I had no clue,” he laughed off casually. “I mean Jason had alluded to it before but…”“Wow you're oblivious,” he rolled his eyes. “Matt. We all know that you're not the brightest but,” he snickered into his palm. “This is a whole new low. I used to be really obvious.”“Is that what Jason was getting jealous over?” he reminisced for a second and blinked. “It makes a lot more sense...now that I think about it.”Max chuckled joyously. It was odd to think that he was so okay with that fact now. He actually thought that it was pretty funny, if anything. “Did Jason actually hate me at one point?”“Nah, I don't think so,” he brushed off. “He can get jealous sometimes, but I don't think he had any ill intent or anything. Plus, I know for sure that he absolutely loves you as a friend right now. Trust me.”“I’ll glad,” he smiled to himself. “I feel the same way. I mean, obviously I had some sort of dislike for Jason at first. He was like this random stranger and it was the two of us for so long. I don't like outsiders very often.”“I know Max,” he nudged him lightly. “Of course I know that. You’re my best friend and I’ve known you for a lifetime,” he sighed. “But damn...I can't believe I was completely oblivious to the fact that you liked me.”“Yep,” he agreed. “That's pretty unbelievable Matt.”“...I owe Jason money,”“Yep—wait. What?” he choked. “Did you bet money on this Matt?”“No…?” he questionably muttered. “It was Jason’s idea okay?!” he pouted. “Please don't get mad.”His bottom lip hungover and his large eyes blinked tearfully. “Don't pull that face on me Matt,” the thinned out his eyes. “How much money did you bet?’“...$100…”“$100?! Are you kidding?!” he crossed his arms. “We’ll be living together anyway,” he dismissed. “And my family has money, it’s fine.”“You’ve never learnt the concept of money, have you?” he rubbed his temples. “So…” the brunette peered towards him. “Do you still love me?”“Gross no,” he snapped. “Well, not like that anyway.”“So you don't want a kiss or like-?”“Matthew!” he screeched. “You have a boyfriend!”“Oh, I was joking,” he said casually, his face blank and as oblivious as it always was. “I don't know,” a smirk slowly creeped to his lips. “Jason did say that it would be fine if we kissed. As long as it was you-”“Matthew!” he repeated, making the brunette cackle.“I was joking! Jesus, I love it when you freak out like that! It’s hilarious!” he clutched onto his stomach as he frailed his legs in hysteria. “Don't ever change Max. Ever.”Max groaned into his hand.“I hate you sometimes Matt,” he laughed. “You've always been so childish.”“But you love me most of the time, right?” he cheesily grinned.“Yes, sadly I do,” he rolled his eyes and snickered. “You know Max…” his words were almost like a whisper. “We’ve gone through a lot. Not only as people but also with each other. And I guess I just wanted to say…” he smiled towards him. One that was warmer and kinder than he ever imagined. “Thanks for sticking with me for literally ages.”“It was absolutely no bother Matt,” he grinned. “I mean, there were a few things that were a bit…unpleasant.”“Understatement of the motherfucking year,”“But you had to deal with mine. And I think we both grew as people because of it,” he bit down on his lip. “I’m gonna miss you Matt. I really am.”“I’ll miss you too Max. I don't really know what life’s like without you,” he confessed.“Well I’m not going to just leave entirely. I’ll just make...less of an appearance. Yeah, I just won’t be a regular in your show anymore but I'll make a cameo from time to time,” he beamed at his own analogy. “Honestly, I’m just excited to see you live the life you want to live. I bet you're going to be really really happy.”“I already am,” he chuckled. “And you deserve happiness too, you know?”“I know. Full heartedly,” they gripped their hands around each other’s. Tightly knit. Perfectly matched. “I’m ready to head off to college and live my life. The way I want.”“You ready to live life to the fullest Max?” Matt let himself gently collapse into his aura a little more. “Of course I am.”
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
Jason wiped a sweat from his forehead. He was definitely not used to manual labour. Actually, this might have been the first time he had to pick up something in years. He chuckled at the thought.“Please tell me that that was the last of your things” Kurtis groaned over, taping up his boxes.Jason was glad to have Kurtis by his side. Basically all the time. He was currently helping him pack away his things. Which took a lifetime to accomplish.“Umm, I think I have a few things in my closet still,” he pushed away his cardboard box, hearing his bits and pieces jingling inside. “You better text me everyday by the way,” Kurtis collapsed onto the cheerleader’s bed. Aka the only thing that was basically left in his room. Apart from a few sets of outfits and his phone. “I will,” Jason slowly opened up his closet, revealing the last of his things. “You better come and visit me.”“I will,” Kurtis glanced down. “If I have time. I mean, my school’s so far away and it’s on the other side of the city,” he faintly smiled at the exciting change. The immense amount of change he had to go through in a couple of weeks. “Guess who has to get new roommates?” they both laughed. “You should be happy that your boyfriend is rich.”“I am happy,” Jason cocked a shoulder as his hands stuck into the assortments of clothes and he began to slowly rummage his way through them.Until he saw the dress.“Oh my god,”“What is it?” Kurtis peered over his shoulder. “Oh shit…” he took it off the hanger and brought it into his hands. It felt nostalgic and tingly. “Violet….”“I haven't seen this dress for ages,” Jason squeaked out excitedly. “Oh my god.”“That was one hectic night,” the brunette mumbled. “I know,” Jason smiled. “I still looked hot though.”“Yeah you did,” Jason winked at the answer. “Will Violet live on?”“Of course she will,” her words were laced with enthusiasm. “Maybe I should start something like that,” he muttered, kind of in a state of denial or self discovery as he spoke. “Drag...or something.”“Oh that's cool,” he encouraged. “You totally should,” he gathered a few things into his hands. “So let’s start with a name.”“Hmm…” Kurtis pondered for a moment. “I want to incorporate Fame into the name.”“Why?” he slowly started lowering them into an empty box. “Because it’s something that I love,” he giggled at his own comment. “I want her to be bitchy, but a high-class, elegant bitch. Like a poise and modelesque bitchy.”“Well you want it to be fun as well, don't you?”“Yeah, of course,” she thought for a moment longer. “Fame Fatale?”“Like that Britney Spears album?” “First of all, that was the gayest possible thing you could’ve said,” he laughed. “And second of all...well, nevermind that name then. Maybe I should go for something simpler.”“Okay something simple like…” Jason leaned over at the wall. And he searched through his memories for ideas. “Miss Fame. Yeah. What about that?”“Miss Fame…” Kurtis let that sink in. “Yeah. Miss Fame. I like that.”They spent the rest of the day packing things up. Up until late in the afternoon, when the sky was dyed a shade of orange and their clothes reeked of sweat and hard goodbyes.Jason wiped his hands on his jeans as he watched Kurtis lower the last box into the moving van. He couldn't help but to part his lips slightly at it and taste the bittersweet air. “Are you excited to leave everything behind?” Kurtis turned his head around and shoved his hands into his pockets. “Eh, I’m not leaving everything behind,” Jason’s stare fixated onto his house. His heart sank a little at the dimming silhouette. “Every memory will stick with me and I’m thankful for it. Even the shitty moments,” he breathed out. “Because I wouldn't be here today, otherwise.”“You seemed like you grew a lot Jason,” Kurtis shifted himself right next to him. Where he really belonged. “I feel like I did,” he acknowledged. “And now we have a couple of days left to be kids,” Kurtis’s index finger lightly touched his, and they couldn't help but to grip onto each other for support. To get tackle that overwhelming feeling together. Jason felt tears form beneath his eyes. Just a little. Okay. A lot. Because everything was slowly coming to an end…This whole chapter of his life. The only chapter that he’d ever known. “Aw Jason. Don't cry,” Kurtis tried to grin over, even though he was crying too. And they wished that they could relive that day again. The day they met. At elementary school when Kurtis was so nervous that he started crying. And he was so lonely and he couldn't find friends for a while. And things seemed horrible until Jason came along and sat next to him that one day and told him that everything was going to be okay. And things did end up being okay. Better than okay. Things were amazing.Things really did work out. You just had to stick with shit for a while until things got better. “Are you excited for the future?” Kurtis asked over, tears clogging his throat. “Yeah, yeah I am.”They both hugged each other so tightly. To make up for all the hugs they needed for the time apart from each other.
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
Danny was so much stronger than he thought he was. He zipped up his jacket, one that was more on the smart casual side compared to his usual clothes, and straightened out his jeans. He smiled at himself in the mirror. He looked...different. He was beaming. Even though it was far from the happiest day. If anything, it was on the other side of the spectrum.Courtney was waiting by the bottom of the stairs for him, gazing up at him with a sincere smile. One that Danny would miss seeing everyday. “You ready Danny?”He wished that they could walk to school together a few more times. It was bitter sweet to go to school for one last time together. He would miss the feeling of being sandwiched together between his two best friends. “Yeah,” he grinned over, rushing down the stairs. She was dressed in something nostalgic and nice. A short, ivory dress that made her look like the good old days. Her hair wavy and prim and clipped back like she used to have it. But in a way, she looked different too. Older. Her features shaped maturely. And she had this smile on her lips like she was already ready for the future. But Danny was on the complete opposite side of the spectrum. Wanting time to slow down so he had more time to hold onto her.“Who’s driving?” she called over to Roy, the older boy stumbling around in Danny’s living room as he scrambled to his feet. “I’ll drive,” he acknowledged Danny with a small grin over to him before he fetched his keys. “Do you have your cap and gown?”“Yeah it’s in my bag,” she flashed her item that she used to sling over her shoulder almost every single day. One that Danny was going to miss seeing. “You?”“Of course,” he smiled. “Last day of school…” he sighed. “I can't believe we made it this far.”“Me either,” the blonde glanced down. “And I can’t believe how quickly it went.”“But it’s only the beginning, right?” Danny tried to encourage. “I’m really excited for you guys.”“Have fun in high school Danny. Final year is…” Roy trailed off and pondered for the right word. “Hard. But worth it in the end.”They smiled at each other. And the younger boy felt his heart tug, his mind immediately rethinking whether he should leave school or not. It made him nervous for what was to come if he did stay in school, and made him regretful on what he might miss out on because he didn't run away with Roy. Danny shook his head.“Okay, since this is the very last day of school,” Courtney whipped out her phone. “What about a selfie? Since it’s perfect timing.”And with the flash of her phone, Danny was instantly whisked away to a reality filled with goodbyes and rekindling relationships.It was so odd to see everyone cry and hug each other in the hallways. The scenery was just so...different. He felt oddly lonely as he watched them. All the seniors weeping to each other because they had to deal with real life problems now. And there Danny was. Just kind of alone. He was only a year away from facing real life. He wondered how fast next year was going to go for him. Because that year went so quickly. He went through so much looking back, and yet, it felt like everything happened in a blink of an eye.
“Danny?”
He snapped his attention over to Kurtis who was waving his hand in front of his eyes.
“You okay?”
They were at lunch. The very last lunch. The very, very last time they were going to have lunch together in school.He heard his heart crack in his ears.“Y-Yeah,” he bit down on his lip and tried to hold back the tears. “Sorry. I’m really out of it today.”“Aw are you going to miss us?” Jason’s tone had the slightest hint of snark, but it was actually mostly filled with pity and sadness. It was probably because of those emotions weighing down on him that day. “Obviously…” Danny parted his lips and sniffed for a moment, making Max instantly lunge over to him and wrap an arm around him for comfort. Danny was going to miss Max so much it hurt. The comforting embrace he’d always give him, and the sense of support that he always gave the younger boy. Max was someone that was irreplaceable. His intelligence, his wit and just his overall mother-like attitude was something Danny needed in his life. But in a way, maybe he learnt a bit of the skills from him and Danny was ready to use them in his life. Who knew?“It’s okay Danny,” the grey haired boy peered down at him, his eyes looking pretty glassy himself. “This was an absolutely amazing year with you and I hope you enjoy the rest of high school.”“Yeah...will try,” he chuckled lightly. “Where are you going for college again?”“I’m studying business out East. It takes around the same time to get to the city, but it’s in a different direction,” he explained. “It’s a single train away from Kurtis though.”“That means you can come and visit me,” the brunette smirked over.“If I have the time,”“You guys are moving so far…” Danny muttered, trying to stretch out a grin for them. His friends. “We’re never going to stop talking to you though,” Jason tried to reassure. “We’ll talk over the group chat and Skype is a thing. And we’ll come and visit in the holidays.”Sometimes Danny thought Jason was funny. Unintentionally. He was sometimes the absolutely biggest bitch, but he could also be such a nice friend. He was oddly the one person that could make him feel better. No matter what. Because everything felt so genuine about him. Danny was going to really miss his company and everything he added to his life. “And of course, if you ever, and I mean ever, need to talk to anyone, any one of us will love to help you out, okay?” the brunette continued to reassure. “Because we know that being a high school senior can get tiring and frustrating.”“Agreed,” his boyfriend smiled over to him. “And you can come and visit us any time Danny. Anyone here can, obviously. It’s a really nice place actually.”Danny liked Matt’s smirk and his stance. He seemed so much more confident and settled after...the mess. Like he appreciated everything in his life and life overall more. His heart clenched from knowing that he couldn't see him anymore. Especially now that Matt was getting better. Danny imagined up all the things they could have gone through and he wanted to do. Those regrets. Not saying that he wasn’t thankful for everything they did go through though. Because he really was. Really, really.“And obviously you’re welcome to ever come over to my apartment too,” Kurtis chimed in, snickering. “Even though it’s small and you probably wouldn't want to.”“And you can crash at mine when you can’t pay your rent and you get kicked out,” Danny joked, the other boys bursted out into laughter as Kurtis pulled an over dramatic expression.“Oh fuck you Danny,”It was weird to think that Kurtis was gonna be gone. That he wasn’t going to be there with Danny and have banter with him anymore. Or look after him. Or just be there. Period. He had this hilarious, both intentional and unintentional, vibe about him that Danny oddly liked. And he was just an overall good person, with a quirky sense of humour and weirdly likeable nature. Danny wished he could hang onto his hand forever and never let go of him.It was just the fact that they’d been friends for so long that he forgot what it was like to not be with them. Every single day from breaks to weekends. And he felt like he learnt so much from them and well...he wasn't really sure if he was ready to grow up and find them not there anymore.It was like they were ready to move on, but he wasn’t. “Hey guys…” he started, trying to meet every single one of their gazes. “Thanks. For this year, and the years following. You guys have been the absolute best and I had so much fun. Like...I don't really know how to put it into words.”“Aw Danny,” Max the first to gaze over at him and smile. “We feel the same way.”“I just wish that this moment never ends…”He felt the boys next to him grip onto his hand."Don't worry Danny," Max whispered over. "This moment..." his sighed. "This moment is eternal. We're eternal, Danny."
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
Danny made sure that he was sitting at the very front. So he didn't miss a single glance.It the final assembly of the year. With all the seniors seated along the first few rows of seats. Danny always knew that the year above him was small, but it was so much more obvious when he visually saw it. He was a junior, which meant that he was seated right behind them, and he was conveniently sat in the front row of his bunch. He was quick to notice Matt, Kurtis and Max all sitting really close to each other, because of their last names, and Jason in the row just in front of them. And they were dressed up in their graduation caps and robes. All dyed a dark navy colour and embellished with gold. Danny’s eyes were tentatively starting at all the little details of the ones in front of his field of vision. One that was getting foggier and glassier by the second.He noticed Roy glancing back at him every now and again, shooting him small smiles of comfort to make him feel better. But truth be told, it wasn't. Nothing really was.The young boy knew that he was going to make it out alive. Obviously. This was far from the end of the world and this was nowhere near the worst thing he had to face (that year) but...it just felt surreal to know that it was coming to an end. That his life was going to continue on, but just without all these people he grew close to. They were basically his life, really.
“Courtney Act”
She was the first one to be called up. And man, the more Danny watched her, the more he knew that she was born to be on stage. With her long, blonde locks and bright smile, she was already headed for the future, with her head held high and her stance great. She shook hands with the principal and proceeded down the stage, locking eyes with Danny for a moment as she gave him a look. A look that he interpreted as a “good luck Danny”.
“Willam Belli”
Danny didn't know her very well. That's what always scared him about her. That she was unpredictable and he was oddly protective over Courtney. And really, to that day, he was still weary about her. Because Courtney meant so much to him that he didn't want to see her hurt. But as she received her certificate and went into a tight embrace with Courtney, that's the moment he finally caved in. Like he finally accepted it and let her win, in a way. And he was able to fully come to the realisation that Courtney wasn’t a child anymore, and this was the future that she chose. And he was happy for her.
“Jason Dardo”
He looked just as flamboyant as he usually did. Strong jawline and piercing smile as he accepted his certificate and gave a long bow in front of the crowd. Like a huge “fuck you” to the school because he survived through everything. He was honestly like resilience personified because of all the shit he had to go through, but here he was, shining, like he deserved to.
“Matthew Lent”
He was the boy who had it the toughest, probably. One of the toughest. From popular footballer, to a druggie, turned shameful faggot, to overdosing druggie again, to the likeable kid finally. He’d gone through a lot of transformation that year, but the look on his face made it seem as if he learnt from it. He grew from it and he was pleasantly happy with the outcome. The fight he found in himself gave him this new complexion that was indescribable and as Danny watched him part with the stage, they gave each other longing grins.
“Kurtis Mikkelson”
His presence was captivating to watch. He had this confident aura about him that automatically drew everyone towards him. And that moment was no different. Danny watched in the crowd, being the loudest supporter for him as he accepted his certificate. What made Danny so excited to see him was all the potential futures he had. Because he was so talented so he could go so far. And he was so excited to see that.
“Roy Haylock”
He’s Danny’s boyfriend. His best friend. His absolute one true love. And also the kid that went last because he was an honorary student. Student council member, head of the theatre department and just an overall great guy. Danny felt pure joy and pride as he watched him. He really felt like just getting up and yelling “That’s my boyfriend up there!” because he was so proud of him. It was a particular type of feeling...to be so happy for someone that it hurt. He laughed at that thought.
“Max Malanaphy”
He goes last, being the valedictorian and all. Like everyone predicted. And yet, Danny was still so extremely proud of him. Because a guy like him deserved it. The guy that tried at absolutely everything and made sure that everything was perfect. No one could feel jealous to losing to someone like that. Because he deserved it. 100%. “Good evening, ladies and gentlemen. It is a great honor to be here. I would like to express my appreciation to all of my teachers, friends, and family members who helped me get to this point in my life. Where I stand here in front of you,” he smiled widely. “Almost exactly four years ago, I remember leaving my middle school class for the last time and heading into the exciting (and sometimes scary) world of high school. I know a lot of you were nervous, though you won't admit it now. High school can be intimidating, for sure. But it can also be a place for growth. And I was able to learn that through school work, commitments, but most importantly,” he looked into Danny’s eyes. “My friends.”“I admit, I wasn’t absolutely thrilled about growing up. I never thought I’d be ready, and yet, right now, I feel as if I’m ready for the future. And I have to thank the experiences I went through for my feeling right at this moment. This year has been...very tough. For a lot of us. But I also believe that I grew as a person because of it,” he glanced down.“Don’t take life for granted. We do, at the end of the day, only get to live once, so let’s all live it to the fullest. I believe that it is your time, now, to set the goals you want to achieve. But before we can do that, however, we need to have a vision. A dream. A passion. I mean, we have absolutely no idea where we’re going to be in a few years time. We might be at university, college, or we might have a job, who knows? Maybe even a family. No matter what this dream of yours might be, you are sure to get there if you put in dedication, determination and love into this goal, and these are all skills you learnt while going through high school and life,” he closed his eyes for a moment. Half, due to the blaring lights, and half due to the urge for tears.“I wish you luck, juniors, because senior years is going to be one heck of a ride. And as for us seniors,” he flipped himself around, but it wasn’t like he was talking to the rest of the grade. No. He was just looking towards his three friends, who were lined up next to each other. Faces in awe. “We made it guys. We finally made it.”
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
Danny’s thumb pressed against the camera as he snapped a picture of his friends. The four of them, all dressed in graduation caps and robes smiling brightly towards the future as he stood in the shadows of uncertainty. “Hey Danny, why don't you join us in the photo?” Jason hurried over to him and pushed the youngest boy in the middle of the bunch. Danny awkwardly shifted himself into the frame and stretched out a small smile.“Hey Courtney! Court!” Kurtis called over, the blonde perking her attention towards them. “Can you take a photo for us?”“Sure thing,” she piped, giving a little wink over to Danny who was pleading awkwardness with his eyes.Courtney looked back at the picture she took. “Aw, this is such a cute picture,” she smiled, handing back the phone to Jason with a beaming expression. “You should set it as your lock screen Jase.”“I will,” he replied, quickly clicking away on his phone. “Thanks Court.”“Have a nice year,” she went off to join Willam’s side, of course. Went off to snap a few pictures herself and sign everyone’s yearbooks. Little miss popular. That never changed, even to the very last moment of high school.“It’s been, like, 2 hours since school ended and we’re still lingering around,” Kurtis gazed at the school buildings. The large, dark silhouettes that were melting into the red skies. “It’s kind of ironic, don't you think? That we wanted to leave so badly before and now that we get to leave forever, we don’t want to?”Max laughed.“Very true,” he whipped out the keys from his pocket. “And now that I got my driver’s license-”“Oh my god, what?” three of the boys snapped their attentions over. “Since when?!”“Like last week,” Matt informed. “I thought you told them Max.”“Wait, how do you know?” Jason questioned his boyfriend. “Because I helped him learn how to drive,” he shrugged nonchalantly. “Are you kidding?” Danny laughed over. “Matt? You asked Matt to help you learn how to drive?”“I’m a great driver,” the brunette pouted.“I don't really think any of you guys are that great…” the youngest boy mumbled.“Oh shut up Danny you can’t even drive,” Jason elbowed him with a giggle. “I call shotgun!” Kurtis called out, dashing towards the front of the car. “Good, it means that Kurtis will die first when Max crashes,” Danny poked a joke as he slipped into the back seat. “Danny’s being so shady today,” Jason teased, taking the seat between him and Matt.“So,” Kurtis flipped his attention over to Max as they lingered by the front of the car. It was just as the taller boy was going towards the driver’s seat. “You ready to drive home from school? For the very first and last time?”The grey haired boy watched the past behind him fade a little. And he knew that the only things that would last were his memories which were carved into his mind like stone.“I guess so…” Max muttered. “We really did go through a lot this year. And I feel like we’ve grown really close as friends.”“Yeah we did. We’re closer than we’ve ever been,” the brunette placed a hand onto his shoulder. “And I just wanted to say thanks. I was always so difficult, especially when it came to you, and we butted heads a few times, so I just have to say thanks. For working things out with me.”“I could say the same thing to you,” he peered down towards him. “You’re really special Kurtis. And I’m really excited to continue on with our friendship after school, and for the rest of our lives.”As his fingers wrapped around the door, he suddenly halted and gazed over at Kurtis who was getting ready to hop over to the other side.“Wait Kurt,” he stopped him in his tracks. The boy instantly smiled.“Kurt,” he muttered. “That's a cute nickname.”“Y-You know, I went through a lot this year and I need to thank you for helping me through some things…” he flushed a light crimson as he spoke.“Umm yeah. No worries Max. I’ll always be here for you when you need me,” he brushed off casually.“Because you helped me fix a lot of things, especially mental things, that I had trouble with but…” he swallowed. “There is one thing that I haven’t fixed yet and I think I need your help.”Kurtis took a few steps over to him. “What is it?”Max shut his eyes and just decided to...go for it. Might as well take some risks, right? He chuckled at his own thought. He didn't hesitate. He lunged over to him. Crashing their lips together. Maybe a little on the softer side. Tender and sweet. Not messy and sloppy like the very first one they had together.Kurtis gasped as the taller boy parted and gave a small smile. Hopping into the driver’s seat, the brunette stood by the front of the car, completely stunned and speechless. For maybe the first time in his life. That was saying something. It took, well, something, to say the least, to make Kurtis shut up. His thumb lightly glided against his lips before he giggled lightly.
“Finally fixed that messy first kiss of ours…”
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
“Hey Danny, it’s me. Brian. We said we would jam together, and we didn't really get the time to because of uh...let’s say, mild delamas. So I decided to send you a little song that I wrote up. Tell me if it’s good.”
Danny hadn’t listened to the whole thing at that point. He decided to wait until he could listen to it with his friends. And well, it seemed like the perfect moment.
Living's like a jigsaw
And the farther in you go
If you're missing pieces
Never really know
With Max driving comfortably and Kurtis awfully quiet and in awe as he watched him. And with Jason and Matt curled up next to each other as they watched their town fade into mere obscurity.
When you're ticking like a timepiece
On which you can rely
Wonder why you wind it
When you're running out of time
Danny tapped his foot along with the comfortable beat, quickly finding his mind roaming again. Like it used to. But this time, it was so much more pleasant. He started to wonder about all the endless possibilities of his future. All these amazing things he could accomplish. And that’s when Danny realised, that he was a dreamer again.
When you're ticking like a timepiece
On which you can rely
Wonder why you wind it
When you're running out of time
And who fucking cared if he was staying in school? So what he wasn’t moping and crying around? He was happy with his choice. He made the right one. He knew it because, well, he made it. And he knew himself better than anybody else.
Living's supposed to kill you
But it shouldn't feel like dying
Loving's supposed to fill you
But it spills you like your wine
Max was deliberately taking the long way around. So they could appreciate the scenery of everything in their town one last time together. From the small shops, to cafes, to the mall, to small parks. Letting the melody seep through their skin as the world around them slowly faded from the deep crimson to an ashy navy.
And all the paper people
Wandering about
Wondering who made them
And who's gonna cut them out
He didn't want to let this go. But the future was quickly approaching them and there wasn’t much he could do about it. The only thing he could do was accept it and work with it. To let that reality hold true and to continue making himself happy after that. He wasn't going to give up. Not now, not then, not ever. Because he was a fighter.
Sometimes there's a danger of choking on the parts
No one gave a warning to the breaking of your heart
Pick up all the pieces and go back to the start
Never losing, only using all your moving parts
All your moving parts
He placed one foot onto the pavement. That's when reality hit again. He looked back to see his friends, looking over to him with smiles of reluctance but joy. Like a “work hard and stay strong” kind of expression.And then he smiled back.“See ya guys,” he said it for the very last time in...a very long time. A very, very long time.“Bye Danny,” they whispered, not in unison, but cascading after one another. “I’ll never, ever forget you guys.”As they shared one last, long and satisfying hug, he knew it had to end. All good things came to an end. And that novel, just closed on itself. For Danny to look over in his dreams and fantasies.He lingered for a tad longer, just to soak in that moment. So he could cry a little longer and let himself breathe. He felt his chest concave in and his lips burn from how hard he was biting down on them. He was going to miss them so much it physically hurt.“To us, for another amazing year,” Max shakily breathed out. “Full of laughter…”“...and pain…” Jason whispered.“...and hardships…” Matt’s words tumbled out of his lips. “...and determination…” Kurtis crinkled his eyes shut. “But most of all…” Danny’s voice hitched. “Friendship. Our friendship. Ones that are eternal and forever.”He hugged them. Oh so tightly. Watching them drive into the distance was a unique sort of satisfying. He couldn't help but to stand out and watch them until he couldn't see any remains of the car anymore. Just so he could say that it was complete. This moment was complete.
“Well that was painful to watch”
That familiar voice spoke to him as arms wrapped around his waist. He comfortably soaked in the feeling.“Even I was tearing up while I watched it,” Roy smiled against him. “That was one of the hardest things I had to do…” he confessed. “I’m going to miss them a lot…”“You’re allowed to move on Danny,” the older boy said. “You know that. You know that you don't have to stay in school and you can chase your dreams.”“I know Roy,” he mumbled. “Please don't make it any harder than it has to be. I’m just not ready yet. I want another year to just find out about myself and grow as a person.”He sighed.“I know Danny. And you know all I want is the absolute best for you, right?” he gave a small nod as a reply. “Because I adore you.”He immediately flipped around.“W-Wait? What-?”“I remember that Christmas incident Danny,” he laughed. “You don't think I would remember a stunt like that?”“N-No…?”“That's one of the earliest moments of me realising that I was absolutely falling in love with you,” he admitted. “That sassy, fun, outgoing, bright, gave-no-fucks, confident Danny. The one I’ve been seeing all along but seemed to dwindle out. That's the one that I absolutely love,” Danny smiled widely at his words. “And it was a shame, really. Because you seemed to lose that part of you in the last few years especially, but look at you now. You’re glowing. Like you did before and like you’re supposed to,” he gazed into the distance. “It’s as if those boys brought you back…” he shook his head. “Either way, I’m just so ecstatic to see you like this,” he grabbed onto his hands. “I’m head over heels for you Danny. I don’t know what else to say. And it’s killing me that you can't come with me and we can't live the dream but, I’m so happy that you're living the life you want to because, you know what? That's my dream. My dream is seeing you happy and I’m glad you're doing this for yourself.”“Roy…” he whimpered.“Danny Noriega. I’m absolutely, full-heartedly, in love with you,”“Roy…” he couldn't help but to repeat. “M-Me too. I don't know how else to say it. I love you, with all my heart and there aren't words to describe it.”He threw his arms around him and lunged over, their lips placed together perfectly. Tears made the kiss have a salty twang, but it was still so sweet. The feeling of love and being loved. It was a flavour too complex to put into words. As Danny parted, he couldn't help but to rethink everything at lightning speed. His face went blank."Danny?" Roy gave out a little snicker. "You look completely confused. Like your face is blank and-""I'm coming," he hastily spurted out, uncertainty by his lips."W-What?""I'm coming. With you. To the city," he gazed into his eyes. "I have to.""I thought you weren't ready or something and you wanted to grow up and-""No I'm ready," he shook his head. "I am. I know that now. I was just nervous about everything happening, and I thought I wasn't ready and everything but..." he took a deep breath. "There's nothing else I cant face, really. Is there? I went through virtually anything you could go through during high school and I made it out alive so..." he shrugged stiffly. "...I have to be ready, right?""Of course you are," he inhaled the air between them until there was no space left between. "You're capable of absolutely anything Danny. I love you so much.""I love you too."Now that year, was a fuck-storm. You could say that your whole life is a fuck-storm, really. But that year in particular was...well shitty. Everything changed and things seemed to go towards a bad ending but, it didn't. Because he fought through it and stuck at it. And there he was, right then and there, kissing the love of his life he wanted for so long, having strong friendships that would last forever, and embracing who he is and who he always wanted to be. That’s when he opened his eyes for the first time in his life.And that’s when the story of Sad Boy, finally featured the real Danny Noriega.
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
And all the kids sing along
It’s the sad boy
The no dad boy
Just a bad boy
Danny strummed his guitar. It was a darkly lit room. There was nothing but a single spotlight. A light that was blinding him. They were ever so bright.
Picking flowers during baseball
It’s the fag boy
Always mad boy
Just a sad boy
The room smelt of alcohol and cigarettes. A rustic and metal fragrance. Kind of smelt like his own jacket now.
And all the kids sing along
It’s the sad boy
The no dad boy
Just a sad boy
He sang his last words, letting them tremble a little on his tongue before he lowered his guitar and shot a grin towards the crowd. The room swelled with light again as upbeat music began to play. As he watched all the people in the audience, he couldn't help but to notice how empty it was compared to usual. It was Christmas. A time of his life, that kind of hurt him to say, was kind of lonely. Admittedly. The first person he saw was Roy, where he usually was, his arms crossed and his back pressed against the wall in the wings of the stage. He made his way over to him and gave him a long hug. It’s a feeling of familiarity. Something that became a routine over the years. Roy’s cheap santa hat was tickling the tip of his nose. Danny let out a gentle chuckle at it. “You were great, like always,” he spoke over to him. “Thanks,” he grinned against his cheek. “It’s nice to perform out of drag every now and again.”“Yeah, it’s a lot more laid back and natural,” he held his hands in his own as he slowly guided him through the crowd, like there was a small pathway towards the bar.Willam was serving with a wide grin by her lips. Courtney was by her side, like she usually was. He couldn't help but to feel loneliness pool in his chest...but in a way, he was happy that both of them were there with him. It was Christmas, and the bar was virtually empty, but at least he had 3 people that were there for him. Christmas was lonely for the first time in forever. He usually went back home to spend the holidays with his mom, but he couldn't quite make it home this time round. Plus, the literal snow storm outside made it hard to even get out. “You were great Danny,” she complimented, leaning her elbow against the bar. She passed over a nice glass filled to the top with a bronze liquid. He thankfully drank it down in a gulp as he wiped his lips with his sleeve. “‘Drink taste good?”“Yeah,” he licked his lips and tried to decipher the flavour. “...bourbon and coke?” he chuckled. It tasted of nostalgia and distant memories. “I haven't had it in years. Maybe like 5 years or something like that. High school junior.”“Yeah well, some guy bought you the drink so you should probably thank him,” she gave a light smirk, making Roy stiffen a little.“Umm, what?” he furrowed his brows for a second. “Tell him to fuck off because Danny’s taken.”The younger snorted and lightly patted Roy’s back in a joking manner. “Well who would’ve? I mean there’s no one here other than-”Before Danny could finish his sentence, there, right in front of him, somehow, they were in front of him. He shook his head in disbelief, a gentle chuckle by his lips as he sniffed and felt the feeling of nostalgia weigh down on his chest. “Hey Danny,” they chorused. Them. His friends. His people.He beamed to a point where his cheeks tugged and hurt.It had been...way too long. They used to talk a lot more straight after high school, with daily talks over the group chat, and they’d video call every Sunday and “have dinner together”, but it became less and less frequent after a while. They still liked each other, obviously, but schedules got busier, and life got harder.So as they stood in front of him, in the middle of winter, in the middle of a snowstorm, he felt his heart burn, heating up his whole body.“Guys…” he squealed, unlike his 22 year old himself. He couldn't help but to embrace all of them in a huge squeeze. “I can't believe you guys are here.”“Well we haven’t seen you in person for much too long,” Max explained. “And it’s Christmas. An amazing time for all of us to see each other again.”Everything looked and felt so cozy for Danny. From the winter sweaters, jackets and festive scarves they were all wearing, to the Christmas songs playing quietly in the background. “I-I wish you told me you were coming today because I would’ve dressed up,” the youngest boy giggled, running his fingers through his grown-out locks. “And bought you guys presents and all that.”“It’s fine Danny. Just seeing you is basically a present in itself,” Kurtis nudged him lightly.“Oh, and we didn't bring any either,” Jason added, Matt gently elbowing him. “Ouch.”“Well, we can serve you a couple of drinks if you want,” Courtney chimed in, taking a seat by the bartop. “Will’?”“I got it.”By no time, they were sat by the large window situated at the side of the bar. They managed to pull out a few old sofas and loveseats to position around the scenery outside. It was a winter wonderland outside. Snow clouding the streets, looking incredibly cold. But inside was so warm. With toasty blankets and hot chocolates. “I can’t believe you’ve done so well Danny,” Max commented, leaning back on the chair. “Honestly. I’m incredibly proud of you.”“Yeah better off than we are,” Kurtis chuckled. “We actually just moved in together.”“As…?” Jason tried to tease. “Friends or like-?”“Platonic friends,” Max answered, his back stiffening slightly from embarrassment. Kurtis rolled his eyes.“Anyways,” Kurtis shot a look over to Roy, who was calmly sipping on his mug. “How’s life for you Haylock?”“Fine,” he shrugged casually. “I get to go to theatre school with Court, and get to see Danny perform every night so,” he grinned. “Life’s great.”“Aw cute,” he gently nudged Danny. “He’s a keeper.”“I know,” he whispered back. “...he really is.”“And quick question,” Jason turned his attention over to the two girls by the bar, cuddling within each other’s embrace. “Are they together? Or is this, like a, gal pal thing?”“Umm…” Danny muttered. “Don't you...know…?”“No,” all the other boys chorused.“Well,” he sighed. “That's a story for another day.”“If we ever have kids, do you think we’ll ever tell them our story?” Jason questioned, mostly over to Matt.“Maybe briefly,” he hummed. “I’m just hoping that things like homophobia are completely wiped off the face of the earth by the time we have kids.”“Doubt it but...I wish,” Max chuckled. “I’m glad we survived it, but I sometimes wonder about all the other kids that didn't survive it…”There was a moment of silence. One that seeped through the air.“I want to dedicate the rest of my life to people like that…” Danny mumbled. “Yeah, me too,” Roy supported with a grin. “The world’s going to get better though. I know it. We lived in a really shitty area, and there are probably a lot more like it but…” he snuggled up to Danny a little more. “One day things are going to get a lot better. I mean look at the rest of the world, look at where we’re living. It’s completed accepted here,” the other boys smiled towards him. “I mean, we’re slowly drawing out a win. So fuck all those homophobes, we’re gonna win. And there's nothing they can do about it.”The air warmed with a sense of accomplishment. With a sense of completion. Full circle moment. “...definitely a keeper…” Kurtis snickered quietly.“I’m glad I stuck it out. Thanks for being with me guys,” Danny exhaled deeply, drawing out a sincere smile. One that he couldn't help but to pull every single time he spent time with them. And it had been a while. A long while. But it still tug on his lips like it used to. “My life will never be the same.”“In a good way?” Matt snickered.“Yeah, in a good way,”“To us?” Max raised his mug up a little, remains of hot chocolate staining the bottom of the mug.“Wow, you haven't said that in six years,” the brunette by his side nudged.“To us.”
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
Courtney, no matter how much time had passed, was still Danny’s second mom. Danny liked to snicker at that thought sometimes, but as he stared at himself in the mirror, with her behind him, running a comb through his hair like they were little kids; he truly realised it for the first time. How loving and caring she was to him. No matter what. It was something that Danny was eternally grateful for. “You look pretty calm Danny,” Courtney commented, running her hands down his hair and to his shoulders. She smoothed out the fabric of his tux. It felt cool and pearly on her fingertips. “That's because I am,” he gently eased into a smile. He hadn't had the chance to look at himself in the mirror properly for...maybe a few years now. He barely had time to even take a breath as he got older. With work and all that. But as he stared at himself in the mirror, he finally got to have the chance to see himself happy for the first time. Truly, truly happy. He looked nothing like he used to when he was a teenager. Instead, he looked indescribably happy. Comfortable. Ok with where he was at in life. “I'm calm, but that doesn't mean I could be any happier.” “I don't know," Courtney began. "I imagined your big day to be really nerve wracking and exciting,” she confessed, straightening out her own dress. It was coloured a nice, pale pink. Something that resembled the dresses she used wear when she was younger. “Like I imagined you totally freaking out and running all over the place because you lost your pants.” “Of course I’m excited! I’ve been waiting for this day forever!” he whined, stretching out his arms. “Maybe the nerves and shit died down. Yeah. It died down ages ago. I’m just ready to get hitched!” “Don't say it like that Danny,” she gently chuckled, hugging him tightly from behind. “You sound like you're ten years old.” “I’m ten years old on the inside!” he spread out a cheesy smile. “Don't ever change,” “I won't.” Danny took one last, long look at himself before Courtney was able to yank him away from the chair and shove him into the car. It was the final time he would see himself as an unmarried man. Man. He wondered when he became an adult. Whether it was when he legally became an adult; or it’s when he graduated; or if it was when he got his first job; or maybe he wasn’t yet. Maybe it was when he actually got married. Maybe it was an emotional thing. Who knew? Danny sure the heck didn't. But he somehow found comfort in being confused all the time now. Like he was used to it or something. As Courtney drove the two of them and Willam to the venue, guests were already slowly arriving. Which was a good thing for Roy because he had been pacing back and forth for virtually hours on end. It meant that it was getting closer. Little by little. He told himself that it was because he was so excited that he couldn't wait, but it was also because he was so nervous that he couldn't sit still. His hands were fidgeting and he was a complete, sweaty wreck, but Danny’s friends and family couldn't help but to peer on and think that he was adorable. “Roy, dear,” Danny’s mom gently pulled on his sleeve. Roy snapped towards her accidentally, but gently eased up on a smile. Well, an awkward looking one. “You don't need to freak out so much.” “S-Sorry,” he mumbled out, a lot quieter than he wanted to. “I’m just really excited.” “I bet Danny is too,” she tried to reassure. “And he’s coming really soon. Don't stress out too much.” “I can’t help it…” he let out a nervous chuckle. “It feels like I’ve been waiting for this moment forever.” Danny’s mom let out a wistful yawn. “I’m glad Danny found someone like you…” she smiled to herself. “...he’s hopeless without you.” Roy bursted out into laughter. Before he could fully reply, however, he gave a glance over to the entrance and saw...two people he would’ve never expected. Never imagined to come. The thing is, Roy remembered inviting them so vividly. It was when Danny and him were arranging the guest list on their apartment floor, with names thrown all over the place and phones attached to their hands as they scrolled through Facebook. They were also simultaneously trying to figure out seating arrangements for the reception, which honestly didn't turn out very well because everything around them was so messy. Nonetheless, Roy remembered it being a warm afternoon. A pleasant one. Filled with their usual banter and chuckles. And as they were about to wrap up, Danny asked a simple question.
“What about your parents?”
“What about my parents?” Roy raised an eyebrow.
“You don't want to invite them?” he said in pure confusion.
“I came out to them, like, two years ago, and do you remember how that turned out?”
That memory triggered way too many emotions for him. An awkward dinner party. Danny looking like he was on the verge of tears. Weird, insensitive questions. Yeah. Not the best situation.
“Yeah, but they're your parents Roy,” he reasoned. “And it’s our wedding. It’s, like, your big day.”
“I don’t think they'd want to come…” he glanced down.
“I don't know. Maybe you should invite them. Just in case?”
And Roy actually did send them a letter. But it was more like a passing comment. Like he wasn't taking the invitation seriously and he was really doubting that they'd come. But. Roy instantly rushed over to them, but he had just enough self-restraint to not hug them. His eyes teared up a little as he stood in front of them. His tux suddenly felt so much looser.“H-Hi…” it was the only thing he could manage to think of saying. “Nice to see you Roy,” when his own dad acknowledged him, he felt the world around him swirl. “You’re looking very nice,” his mom complimented, lightly brushing down his suit jacket. “T-Thanks,” he pressed his lips together. “Thanks...for coming.”“We wouldn't want to miss a day like this,” his mom said. “Even if we don't agree with everything…” she exhaled. “You're still our son. You're still our Roy. And we wouldn't miss this for the world.”With one embrace that nearly filled up the empty feeling in his heart, he guided them to the front of the room, and they took a seat next to Danny’s mom.
Everything was coming together at that point.
Everyone was seated in the right chair, which really thanked Roy calm down a little. And everything just looked...perfect. Felt perfect. Nearly perfect.
“Kurtis, your tie isn't straight,”
“Oh, oops,”
“Come on, you need to look presentable for Danny.”
Roy couldn't help but to laugh at Danny’s old friends. They were always so oddly amusing to watch. He stood beside them and shot a smile. Even as they grew older, Danny had a strict “Spice Girls” policy or something on them. Like a “If you wannabe my lover, you gotta get with my friends” thing. Danny’s always been really protective over them. So Roy honestly thanked the gods that he got along with them. And that they were so accepting of him. Maybe too accepting if anything. “Looking hot Roy,” Kurtis smirked over to him as Max had his hands around his lopsided tie. The taller boy rolled his eyes.“You can't say that Kurtis. He's getting married today,” Max snickered, obviously amused. “Are you excited?” Jason lightly nudged him. “Of course I am. I can’t wait for him to come already,” he shoved his hands in his pockets so they could stop trembling. The anticipation was killing him. "That's adorable," Matt commented. "But he'll be here soon. Don't stress out too much." Like his comment was a prophesy, right on cue, Roy saw him. He knew what Danny looked like from miles away. With his long, dark hair and straight stance. When they locked eyes, the whole world stood still. It was like nothing else mattered but the two of them. And each of Danny's footsteps as he strolled over to Roy. Max played a serene solo in the background. One that sounded a little muffled from the atmosphere. Or, it did for Roy at least. he positioned himself in front of the altar, his hands awkwardly clasped in front of him. He lost all sense of direction as Danny stood by him. It was such an odd sensation. They virtually spend every waking moment together. Lies. They even sleep next to each other. But right at that moment, as they stood by the altar next to each other, it felt nerve wracking. For the first time in so long.
"Hey,"
Danny whispered over to him jokingly. Roy grinned widely. He was sure that the marriage officiant was talking. You know, saying those typical things. But Roy shut it all out. Subconsciously. He couldn't help it. He couldn't but to gaze over at him and fall in love with him. Over and over again.
"And now it's time for the grooms to say their vows,"
"Danny," he spoke his name. Prim. Bold. "We've known each other for as long as I can remember. We have so many years and memories under our belts and I want to spend the rest of my life cherishing them," he smiled. "I'm eternally thankful for meeting you. I've never believed in fate, but I do think that we were meant to be," he grinned at himself for such a quote. "The first time I fell in love with you is when I realised how creative you were. Ever since you were little, you've always had a great eye for art. In any form. The second time I fell in love with you is when I realised how brave you are. And how daring you can be. How you can always take risks. You always brought a spice to my life that I can never get enough of," he flushed a little redder. "And the third time I fell in love with you is when I realised how much of a great person you are. I've always known it, but in all those times I needed you, and you were there for me. And the times that I was straight up horrible to you, but you were still there for me..." he shook his head. "You are the most selfless person I know. And I'm so in love with you. I fall in love with you more and more each day as I get to know more of you. And I want to spend the rest of my life loving you. More and more. Danny was in tears at that point. His hands gripped onto his ever so tightly and he gazed towards him with a trembling bottom lip. Awe. Straight-up love. "Roy," he began, his breath a little thin. "You have no idea how long I've liked you. I've liked you for as long as I can remember. Both as friends and more. But I think I fell in love you the moment we got to know each other," he sniffed. "We have gone through a lot. Together and by ourselves. But as we got through it, we learnt from it. That's what I love about us. Together. That we can grow closer and grow as people. I never thought that I'd be ready to grow up and be an adult or whatever but...you help me realise that I can be. And you helped me get to this point in my life. And it's a point in my life that I can proudly say it amazing," he gushed. "I'm truly happy with you Roy. There isn't anything else I can say. Sure, there are moments when we have fights, like any relationship has, and there's been moments, long time ago in the past, that made me want to rip out my own hair," they both chuckled. "But it was all worth it. I'd live through absolute hell-aka high school-all over again if it meant that I could spend the rest of my life with you. Because I can't think of anything better." "Well," there was a light chuckle from the minister. "I now pronounce you married. You may kiss one another." That kiss. Was perfect. Nothing else in the world tasted the sweet. And felt so perfect. And sent tingles down their spines. It was indescribable. But it was them. It was the two of them. As perfect as ever. If only Danny knew that things were going to be that perfect for him in the future. Because things were so tough for him for so long. But then again, it was worth it, looking back. He became the person he was then because of all his experiences. And he was eternally grateful for everything he went through. In general, but especially with Roy. He gazed longingly into his eyes for a moment so he could catch his breath. "I love you Roy." "I love you too Danny. Forever and ever."
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
“Um, that’s okay Max. You can just sit down now,” Kurtis laughed over, gesturing for the taller boy to take the seat in front of him.It was a relatively nice afternoon. Calm. Casual. Max had his heart set on just collapsing onto his bed and not waking up for a while because he finally had a free afternoon, but he found Kurtis oddly forcing himself into his house and he couldn't exactly say no. He wasn’t really upset by it, actually, he quickly realised how long it had been since he had hung out with Kurtis and how much he actually missed it. So he was somewhat glad. “If I knew you were going to serve me all this food and tea,” his hands glided over the coffee table in front of them. “I would’ve have come.”He lightly chuckled, Max swallowing at his comment.“S-Sorry?” he piped out in slight confused. “I just want you to feel at home.”“We’re great friends Max, you don’t need to treat me like a princess,” he snickered. “Anyways, there’s a reason why I actually wanted to come over.”“Oh,” Max sat back on his chair. “Yes, what is it?”Kurtis cleared his throat for a moment and glanced down. Max felt a shiver down his spine when the brunette looked down like that. It was ‘that’ look. A specific look that Max identified very quickly. It meant that something was wrong. Or more specifically, something was wrong when it came to Max. A look that was a mix of guilt and worry. “...it was something I found in your room a while ago,” Kurtis mumbled, his voice suddenly lower. “Wait, how did you get into my room?” he asked cautiously.“Danny found it. When he came over?” he reminded. Max hummed with reluctance. “Anyways…” he dug his hand into his pocket and pinched it out. It was just as coarse as he remembered. So spiky and it casted a sense of nausea over him. As he stared down at it, the bold letters much too readable and piercing, he sighed. “He found this pamphlet…” their eyes stopped meeting. “And he was pretty concerned so-”“H-He went into my room?” the taller boys’ voice cracked slightly. Kurtis halted.“I guess so but that’s not-”Max instantly snapped over and took the pamphlet from his hands, cutting him lightly by the fingers. “Shit,” the word accidentally slipped his lips as the brunette lightly caressed his hand. Max jolted back in guilt as he hastily put down the pamphlet. “Oh my gosh Kurtis,” he leaned over. “I’m so sorry. I didn't mean to-”“It’s fine,” he grumbled, sighing deeply as Max’s eyes widened with regret. “...look Max. I really don’t like getting angry. Especially when it involves you but this,” he pointed directly over to the paper, crumpled on the table. “This isn't okay with me. It’s not okay with any of us. Please don't...”He swore under his breath and clutched his hand for a second.“I’m sorry! Wait I’ll get a bandaid and-”“That’s not the problem here Max,” he accidentally shouted at him, making the grey-haired boy knock backwards. “If you’re going to be sorry for anything I want it to be for this stupid fucking, shitty-ass thing you’re going to do to yourself,” Max sat back onto his seat. “I really care about you Max and I really hate seeing you like this. It just...hurts. A lot more than any cut would…”There was a gulp of silence. “I just feel…” Max leaned over against the table. He blinked for a few moments. “...lost. I don't know how to feel. I’m not the type of person to get so confused and lost so, this...worrying feeling that I’m going through with my sexuality is….tiring for me. I just don’t know what to do and I just feel so lost all the time. All I know is that I hate being…” he dodged the word with a gulp. “And I’d do anything in the world to be normal.”Kurtis tried to digest everything with a nod. “Well, let me tell you something Max. You’re not normal,” he looked at him, dead in the eyes. “You’re really special Max. And I’m not the type of person to say that everyone is special. I genuinely think that you’re a really gifted and talented guy and you’re going to go so far in the future. That's why I hate seeing you get so caught up on something like this,” Max flushed a little redder from flattery. “And I’m not lying. And you’ve always been such a smart kid but this,” he pointed back at the pamphlet. “Is probably the dumbest thing I’ve seen. Especially from you.”“I know...I just…”“But I’m not blaming you. Fuck, it sounds like I’m getting mad aren't you. Aren't I?” when he didn't reply, he took the answer graciously. “I get it. I’m sorry. I guess I’m here to just tell you that I want you feeling better and I hope you overcome this. And I’m going to be with you every step of the way until you eventually love yourself,” he glanced down. “As much I love you, anyway,” Max nearly choked on the thin air, but just managed to resist himself. “H-Hopefully more because-” he shook his head. “Fuck me. I’m making this horrible now. I’m not that great with speeches. That's kind of your thing so-”“No,” he cut him off. “No Kurtis. That was great. Really great…” he hummed. “It’s going to take me forever to get over it but...thank you. For looking out for me,” he bit down on his lip to contain his gradually growing excitement. “You mean a lot to me, you know?”“Yeah I know,” he regained a sense of confidence, receiving a chuckle from Max because of his joking manner. “You mean a lot to me too.”That was their full circle moment, filled with soft breaths and understandings. Like everything was kind of coming together nicely. Max felt ease with the smile by his lips, and he couldn't help but to shuffle his way a little closer to Kurtis. Just because it felt more comfortable for him to have him near. That sounded so stupid to him but...everything felt right.Until Kurtis’ voice suddenly hitched.“Shit,”“What?”“My hand’s actually starting to hurt,” he clutched it tightly. “Okay, forget what I said earlier. Can you get me a bandaid?”
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
It was the four of them together for the very first time. It was something that they mostly just brushed off, probably guessing that it was the inevitable. That, coming together, was something they should’ve done a long time ago and that this was them finally acting on it. But Max didn’t think that. He thought otherwise. He would never tell a soul though. He would continuously smile at everyone, no matter how uncomfortable he felt towards everyone but Matt. He never fully understood why Matt was able to get along with people so well. How. Of course he had nothing inherently against Jason or Kurtis, but the thought of them sitting with him and Matt forever (he was hoping that it wasn't forever) rubbed him the wrong way. Like their personalities didn't match and he didn’t want them around. “Okay, but Brian Firkus is really good at hair. Maybe you can ask him?” Matt asked over to Jason, his hand uncomfortably close to him, according to Max. His gaze was tentatively staring at it. “Eh, I could,” Jason shrugged. “But maybe I like my hair long. Like, the whole slick back, bun look.”“Yeah I like it,” Kurtis hummed. “Oh! That reminds me actually,” he piped up. “Do you know think there’s going to be a musical this year?”“Probably not. The theatre club’s barely running,” Matt informed. “Would you know Max? Since you’re in the band?”Max blinked into reality, quickly passing it off with a, “I don’t know”.“Damn. Maybe I should talk to Roy about it,” he pondered. Jason smirked over.“Why? You want to get on stage and sing your gay heart out?” Jason jabbed. The air went still. It was as if Max was completely caught off guard. The wind in his sails was knocked out. He scoffed at it slightly, and all eyes immediately lunged towards him.Matt was the first person to notice his reaction.“I don’t know. I think it’ll be cool to join the musical,” Matt continued, trying to keep the air still. To cover up for Max. “I would if I could actually dance and sing.”“Guess I should go talk to him,” Kurtis continued, but his eyes were still lingering on Max. His vision was a mix between slight annoyance but a hint of pity. An odd mix that only Jason could fully understand.“W-Why don’t you go ask him now?” he snapped. Kurtis raised an eyebrow.“I could just ask him in biology but…”“Why wait?” he tried to gesture at something with his brows. It took a moment until Kurtis realised and he let out a small “oh”. It sounded more like a sigh than anything. “Um...okay,” he slowly rose to his feet, shoving his hands into his pockets. “H-Hey Max, wanna come with me?”The grey haired boy’s face twisted into confusion, but he was quick to let it rinse away. Probably figuring that it wasn’t worth asking. And that maybe he shouldn’t have questioned anything in this group. In a sense, it seemed like he had no authority in this group anymore. Or any say. It made him nervous. “...sure…” it was a whisper, really. Swinging his bag over his back, he slowly trailed behind the brunette. It took a few seconds for the air to readjust. With just the two of them.“So,” Jason began, twisting his head over to Matt. The other brunette smiled widely, revealing slight excitement. “What’s it like being a footballer?”“What you expect,” he said nonchalantly. “Not as cool as the movies but, still pretty cool. Only downside is all the expectations that come from it I guess.”He let out a small chuckle. “Like what? Dating a cheerleader?” he snickered.“Yeah I guess,” “Fun fact," the pause filled the air. "I’m a cheerleader,” he smirked. Matt scoffed. “And what are you hinting at?” his grin grew into a leer. It seemed like he was amused, if anything, and Jason thrived off of that attention. “Hmm, nothing much,” he giggled in a giddy manner. His fingers crawled its way over to his lap, his palm resting against his upper thigh. Matt’s face lightly dimmed.“Hey, Jason, I don’t want you to take this the wrong way but…” his voice lowered. Jason inched away slightly. “...I can’t. I’m sorry. This is the first time we’ve all sat together, and I don’t even know if…” he shook his head. “I’d probably be a bad boyfriend anyway. Like, I’ve never been in a relationship before like-”“I never said that we’d be together,” Matt paused. Jason cracked a sneer. “...I wouldn’t mind that though…”Matt choked on the thick air.“Very funny Jason,” he allowed himself to actually laugh a little. “Are you always like this? A typical, flirty cheerleader?”“Only to ones I like,” he cocked a shoulder. Matt chuckled comically. “You’re great,” he sighed to himself. “...Max’s going to hate you.”“Yeah I can tell,” he rolled his eyes. “He’s a quiet one, isn’t he?” “Definitely. But he’s pretty goofy when he warms up to you,”“Fun. I wonder how long that’ll take.”
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
“So...you want another musical?”
Roy sat beside Kurtis in almost disbelief. The library was virtually empty, and the air was stale and still.“Why would you want that?” the boy asked. “I don’t know…” Kurtis shrugged. “I guess I just wanted to see another one before we graduated.”“We’re still juniors. We still have some time I guess,” he shrugged. “But the whole musical thing is hard work. We need to figure out what it should be, get it approved, then establish roles, costumes, set designs. All that. Tonnes and tonnes of work.”“And you have to handle that all by yourself?”“Basically,” he grinned. “You get used to it though. I’ve always liked working on this shit anyway.”“Is it what you want to do when you’re older?” he seemed genuinely intrigued in everything he was saying.“...maybe,” he thought about it for a second. “I don’t really know. I’m still figuring it out…” he went silence for a second. Shaking his head, he plastered on a smile again and continued. “But I bet that you wouldn’t really want to watch a musical anyway. I mean, the theatre club is filled with newbie freshmans right now,” he blabbered on. “Some sophomores. It’s kind of going to shit, actually.”“That sucks,” he sympathised. “I actually hate freshmans. Have you seen the way they dress too? It’s so…” he gestured to virtually nothing. Like some tumbly mess. “Gross. I haven’t even warmed up to the sophomores yet.”“Eh, they’re not that bad I guess,” he shrugged. “I mean, my neighbour’s pretty cool.”“Who?”“Danny Noriega,” he explained with probably too much enthusiasm. “We were childhood friends growing up. Really nice kid.”“And you live around the area right?” Roy nodded. “Were you childhood friends with Brad too?”“Fuck that,” he snorted. “We went to Christmas parties and Thanksgiving and all that shit together but we were never friends. That reminds me,” a thought sparked him. “Danny used to always sing at those. He really loves music actually. Maybe I should hold another musical.”Kurtis bursted out into laughter.“You sound stupid Roy,” he laughed, shaking his head. “Anyway, we should probably focus on this biology homework now.”Roy’s eyes tried to make its way to his page, but he was suddenly caught up on the figure standing by the bookshelf. “...speak of the devil…” he cracked a small smile.Danny’s gaze was glued onto the books in front of him, and he looked plain confused. It was as if he had no idea how books worked, and he was just blankly staring at them, maybe somehow expecting that it would pop up at him if he stared hard enough. Roy laughed.“A-Actually Kurtis,” he began to throw things into his backpack. “I think I might head off.”“What?” his mouth hang open. “But we just started studying!”“Just,” he scrambled through his notes until he found his answers and practically threw it at him. “There it is. All the answers are labelled on the side. I’ll see you tomorrow.”His words were all tripping on top of each other as he quickly dashed past the bookshelves and to the younger boy’s side. Danny glanced up at him with slight confusion, but it quickly washed away when he figured out who it was.“Oh hey Roy,” he smiled over, like he was trying to completely avoid what he was previously doing. “What are you doing here?”“I was studying with Kurtis but,” he glanced over at the brunette boy, who was scratching his head at the notes and at his own blank page. “We’re done.”“Guess you can help me find Othello then,” he chuckled. “I’d ask the librarian but…she kind of scares me.”“Fair enough. It’s in the other section,” he snickered over. Danny trailed behind him as they scavenged through the library. “Shakespeare has its own section actually,” he guided him towards the smaller shelves set up around the other side of the room. “Located at the front,” he swiftly picked up the thin book and placed it onto the younger boy’s hands. He felt the sense of odd confidence grow in his cheeks. “There you go.”Danny laughed.“Thanks Roy,” he balanced it on top of his right palm. “Hey, wanna get a milkshake on the way back? It’s been a while.”“Yeah, of course.”
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
“Yeah, Courtney was telling me that they celebrate Christmas in July too because it’s always hot there when it’s actually Christmas,”
Walking with just the two of them felt right. It had been a while, but Danny thought it felt as familiar as ever. The sweet taste of his chocolate milkshake bounced off his tongue, tasting like nostalgia, and with his backpack over his shoulders and his conversations with Roy, it honestly felt like they were little kids again.
“Well that’s stupid. You can’t celebrate Christmas twice.”
They seemed to talk about useless things all the time. And for a long time. Seriously. It was one of Roy’s favourite things. Danny seemed like the only person that allowed him to let loose and he could somehow always brighten up his day through meaningless conversations.“Actually, that reminds me,” Roy laughed to himself. “Remember those stupid Christmas parties we went to as kids?”Danny gulped, and plastered on a crooked smile.“Y-Yeah…” he chuckled lightly. “It’s been a while.”“I know!” he groaned. “Oh god, I hate Brad and I still hate him.”“Same,” he agreed in a somewhat quieter manner. “Do you think we’ll still hold them this year?”“It’ll be a good opportunity for Courtney to show off again,” they both laughed. “But seriously, it’s been a while since we’ve hung out. And I guess that’s the only way we can actually hang out so, it’s not that bad if you think about it like that. Right?”Danny let out a nervous snicker.“I mean, I guess,” his smile grew into a bit of a smirk. “What? Are you missing me?”His teasing made Roy chuckle at him.“Oh shut up,” he rolled his eyes. “Don’t flatter yourself Noriega,” the younger boy gave a childish giggle. “You've always been like this. Ever since we were, like, 3," he shook his head and took a slurp of his drink. "Oh my god, remember how you couldn't stop talking during movies? Those moments were the worst.""Oh shut up! It's just me. I always do it,""And remember those movie nights we used to have back in middle school?”The younger boy brightened.“Yeah of course! It was the only time I ever watched movies,” he enthused. “Well sort of. I watched the Heathers the other night with Court.”“Did you love it?”“Yeah, a lot,” he grinned. “I think it became one of my all time favourite movies.”Roy hummed to himself.“Did you know that it was a musical?” he glanced down at his almost empty drink and swirled around the remnants at the bottom.“Really?”“Yeah, I should show you the soundtrack sometime. It’s really good,” he stopped in his tracks, knowing that their time was coming to a close. He stared up at his own house, and then towards Danny who was still in front of him.“Yeah, sounds good,” the younger boy loosened the grip around his bag, as if he was ready to already go inside. “I’ll see you later, yeah?”“Yeah,” he mumbled, tugging on a smile.But he knew that the “later” was much later. Much, much later. And for some reason, he was upset about it and he didn’t really know why.
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
It had been a few weeks into being a group and Jason was admittedly loving it. It was like a breath of fresh air, and he loved having more company. Especially because just having Kurtis around was starting to get a little lonely. He thought things were gonna be better this year too. Like a new start. Because he was a junior. Because he was older and everyone else was older so he could stand up for himself. And plus, he figured that everyone finally grew up and matured...but he guessed wrong. Jason was curled up in the hallway, clutching his stomach, coughing up blood and the rest of his dignity. His vision was virtually blurry, only clear around the clock ticking by the wall. 2:10PM. Lunch ended. 5th period just started. And he’s still here, surrounded by a crowd of people he could identify but would never dare to tell anyone about.
“What the hell is going on?”
His eardrums bursted at the voice, and the dreaded air suddenly lightened for a split second. The pulsing in his stomach slowed and he gave himself the chance to take in a gulp of air. “What the fuck are you guys doing?!”It was a familiar voice, something he could only figure out after he got the chance to regain the blood lost in his head. Matt.Jason managed to just make out the football guys circling around him. They looked so large and overbearing from his angle. And in any other angle, really. Matt was slowly approaching them, cracking a light through the thick crowd. The seniors never really picked on Jason. It was mostly the other juniors who had something against him from the moment he walked into high school. So maybe that was why they were listening to Matt. It looked like they kind of lack authority against the brunette. “Jesus Christ. Why the hell are you guys doing this?”“Fucking chill out Matt,” Jason watched him getting nudged lightly. Nothing like the way they shoved him. And kicked him. And pinched him. “You fucking dickheads need to grow up,” he roared. The crowd dwindled into smaller pockets until there was no one left. Only Matt and Jason in the empty hallway. As the last door closed on them, Matt instantly lunged towards him, cradling Jason in his arms comfortingly. “Oh my god Jason, I can’t believe this happened,” his voice cracked like he was going to cry. “I didn’t know they were this...cruel.”“It’s-“ fine. That’s the word he wanted to say until his throat caved in and he coughed. Blood. His hand grew red when he coughed against it. Matt’s eyes widened. “You can’t go to class. There’s no way you’re okay right now,” “It’s fine,” he managed to choke out. “It looks suspicious if I don’t show up to science anyway so-““I’m not going to let you,” his voice was firmer than Jason imagined, and it took a moment until he let himself believe that it was Matt who said it. “W-What?” he stammered.“Let’s ditch 5th period,” he encouraged, his arm wrapping around his. Jason blinked. “Are you serious?” he said in disbelief. “Well you can’t exactly be here anymore, at least for today,” he explained. “And I need to look after you so…”“You don’t need to,” he counteracted.“Okay fine,” he glanced away. “I want to. A lot so,” he pushed up from his knees to get up. “Why don’t we go to the mall? I would suggest my house but my dad's home until-""It's fine Matt," he dismissed quickly. "Come on, let me take you out," he pleaded. "I bet there’s something you want there.”He offered a hand for him, and Jason stared at it for a moment before taking it graciously.“Okay there is something I want…” his voice went a little quieter. “...ice cream...”Matt chuckled. “Actually, there is a really good ice cream place I want to show you,” his warm smile reassured Jason a little. “And I’ll buy it for you. You deserve it.”They began walking down the hallway, their hands a little closer to each other than usual. “Can I ask a stupid question?” Jason almost whispered over.“Yeah. Go ahead,”“Is this a lame excuse for a date?”Matt flushed red, but laughed it off. “You’ll find out.” ***Jason took a spoonful into his mouth and let the creaminess sink onto his tongue. He took a sigh of relief. “This is definitely better than science,” he eased into a small grin. Matt watched over him with a more comfortable expression. “And this ice cream is really good.”“I’m glad you like it,” he took a bit of his own, the salted caramel bouncing off the inside of his mouth. “How long were you wishing to take me to this place?” his voice was a tad more alluring, and Matt was quick to pick up on it. “W-What are you talking about?” he nervously giggled. “Well you said that you wanted to show me this place so…” he gazed at him through his eyelashes. “For how long?”He cleared his throat. “I said it in the heat of the moment,” he lied, scratching the back of his neck. “Anyways, do you do this with every boy you see?”Jason blinked.“Do what?”“Flirt with them,”The taller brunette instantly bursted out into laughter.“Only ones I like,” he winked. Matt stiffened.“And how often does that happen?”“Are you jealous Matthew Lent?” the way he spoke his name made the footballer sweat. There was some sense of excitement he felt with Jason that he couldn’t quite figure out. How everything he said was risque and a little on the edge. It gave Matt a sense of adventure and risk that he wasn’t used to in his mundane, boring life. Jason made life interesting for him. Matt shook his head.“I’m going to take that as a yes,” Jason laughed. Matt couldn't help but to laugh a little too. “Wait. Do you see that?” he pointed directly over to a shop by the far corner of the mall. Matt could just make out a row of dresses hung out in front of the shops, all looking sparkly and shiny. “Wow they look pretty don’t they? I’d want-” Matt, admittedly, wasn’t paying that much attention to his actual words. He was oddly caught up on the way he talked. How animated he seemed sometimes when he was talking about something he liked, or the way his eyes lit up. The brunette never viewed someone like this. It was...weird. Odd for him to. But he felt his stomach turn and churn in a good way. So it must’ve meant that it was a good thing. So he went for it. While Jason was distracted, he managed to sneak something into his cup of ice cream. Matt had planned the whole thing out for weeks now. Trying to figure out when he could ask out Jason properly. “Hey, what’s this?”It was right until Jason was about to throw the cup away on some public bin on their walk back when he noticed a small card sticking out. A small blue one that was folded messily.“Is it a card?” Matt and Jason obviously had a thing. That had been evident since the beginning. But Matt was always so caught up on what it would be like and whether he was going to fuck everything over by actually acting on it. So he always let the thought sit there. Until he realised that all he could do was think of Jason. And he couldn’t stop drawing him in his sketchbooks and writing letters to him that would never get to him. So he decided to settle it once and for all. “If you weren’t such a tease, I’d ask you out properly…” Jason read outloud, staring at it for a moment in confusion. He looked at it for a moment longer, and then back up at Matt, and then down again. He turned a bright red. “Oh my god are you-?”“Asking you out?” he coughed, trying to sound as confident as he felt. “...technically no.”Jason laughed. Properly belly laughed.“Well it’s a yes. A million times yes,” he held the card in his hands before lunging towards Matt with wide arms. Both boys fell in a fit of laughter, stumbling to try and regain their balance. “Jesus, I didn’t know you were such a sweetheart.”“I have a few tricks up my sleeve,” he cocked a shoulder. “That reminds me. My house’s free right now so…”He shrugged a little stiffly, and Jason caught on rather quickly. His smirked reached his ears, and he couldn't contain his excitement. “Sounds fun. Want me to come over?”“Well of course,”“Good. Because it wasn’t really a question. It was a demand, if anything,”“Kinky,”“Oh shut it.”
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They were around 14. Roy 15, Danny 14. One of the only times they’d met up in that period of their lives. Danny remembered how that bag felt on his arms. They were a little dainty at the time. Maybe from life weighing him down a lot. He would never go back to that time. “Hey Danny!” Roy waved over, his voice higher pitched than the way it was now. He was bent over by the front of his house, the garden looking greener and more lively than he ever imagined. It was spring. Danny noted how much Roy used to like tending to the garden in front of his house. On Halloween, they’d get together with Courtney to decorate the whole front of his yard. He smiled at that memory. “Hey, what are you doing?” Danny let himself grin towards him, digging his knees against the ground to prop himself down next to the older boy. “Planting some new flowers,” he wiped a sweat that travelled down his nose. “Mom wanted me to. Plus it’s kind of therapeutic,” he shrugged casually. “Let’s go inside though. There’s some good lemonade that’s in the fridge.” “Sweet.” *** Roy remembered that night as well. The taste of the sweet lemonade on his tongue as they sat back on the couch. It was 11:30PM. They’d spent the whole day just slacking off, watching movie after movie, going through a whole range of genres just to talk shit through each and every one of them. He lowered the glass onto the table next to him. He didn’t actually remember the exact movie they were watching. But he does remember Danny sitting next to him, his back virtually rested on the seat from the way his body collapsed. His eyes were barely open, only opening every now and then like he was forcing himself to stay up. “Hey Danny,” his voice was almost a whisper, hoping that he wouldn’t startle him. The younger boy yawned and slowly readjusted himself. “Do you wanna head to bed?” “No, no,” he gestured. “I want to stay for the rest of the movie.” Roy rolled his eyes and chuckled, scooting over a little to the younger boy. “It’s super boring anyway,” he tried his best to smooth out his voice, the tone becoming more monotone so that he wouldn’t wake him. It was so soft that his breath barely touched Danny’s cheeks. The younger boy’s blinking became slower and slower, just like his pulse. The movie in the background was wrapping up, the closing credits playing from a far distance. Roy’s fingers lightly grazed up against Danny’s thumb. He gulped. Then proceeded to trace down to his wrist. He could feel his heartbeat. Thumping, synching to his own. Danny was now softly snoring, the air slipping in and out of his lips. Roy unintentionally stared. How plump and red they were. They looked so...soft. He leaned in slightly, propping himself up from the back of the sofa. It felt like he was getting drawn in somehow. Dream-like. Maybe it was the night wearing down on him. Maybe it was how dimly lit the room was. Maybe it was how trippy that ending credits song sounded. Either way he couldn’t help but to- He halted. And gulped. His eyes tentatively gazed at Danny’s nose that twitched ever so slightly. A cold sweat beat down his neck as he jolted back and took in a sharp breath. He scrambled to his feet, his eyes darting around the room to preoccupy himself. From his own thoughts. From trying to think about what happened. He shook his head.
Roy wasn’t like that. He couldn’t have been.
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
“Babe, I’m heading down to the cafe. Do you need anything?”
Jason popped his head into the study just as Matt lowered his paintbrush into the dirty water. He shuffled back on his chair to stare at his artwork before replying, “Just my usual.”“Don’t stress yourself out okay,” the dark brunette fetched his brown coat hanging by the door and a matching pair of shoes. Ones that reeked of his fast-paced workplace. “Okay,” his now-husband muttered, giving a small wave. “Love you.”“Love you too.”It was their 10th year of being together. A decade. Jason couldn’t wrap his head around that fact. Especially because everything seemed to be rushing by so quickly. Even after they graduated high school, they were never apart. Going to the same university and living together using Matt’s family’s riches. Something he's thankful for. Jason would eventually be hired by a high-end magazine company, and Matt would become an art teacher. An odd match, sure, but they’d never ask for anything else. With the talk of maybe starting a family together sparking up every now and then, both of them were exhausted. They never had a break. They barely had any time to catch up with Kurtis and Max like they used to every fortnight. The air was getting a lot colder in the city. It was made even colder by the tall buildings which casted shadows across the streets. Jason pushed open the door to his usual cafe and was met with a strong whiff of bitter coffee. The line seemed longer than usual. Maybe because it was the coldest day they’d had that year. He pulled out his phone and unlocked it.
KURTIS: hey
KURTIS: Max wanted to ask whether you’re free this week
KURTIS: we got a new dog
KURTIS: thought you’d wanna meet him
Jason smiled.
JASON: yeah I’m out at the moment but I’ll ask Matt whether his schedule’s free when I get back
The line shuffled forward slightly.
JASON: what’s his name?
KURTIS: Danny Boy
He airily chuckled at the text, taking a moment to glance around the cafe. He’d seen Danny and/or Roy around a couple of times there. Not recently though. A quick check of their Facebook revealed that they’d taken a month off to travel down to Mexico. Jason wondered if he needed a holiday. “An espresso and a…” he started his order, staring up at the menu. Maybe he needed a small change. “Caramel Frappuccino. Thanks.”
JASON: very cute name
He shoved the change into the pocket of his trousers before waiting by the side counter. Sometimes he thought about everything he left behind back in high school. All the good and the bad. Even though he thanked all those traumatic events for shaping him into the person he was today, there were moments when he wondered if he would’ve been happier if he skipped all of that. If he just experienced a normal childhood with his group of friends. No bruises. No bullying. No self-harm. No tears. No homophobia. No drug overdose. Fewer scars— he figured.“Jason?” like a knee-jerk reaction, he reached over to the counter, but there weren’t any drinks there. Instead, he turned his attention over to the man towering over him by his right.He gulped.
JASON: babe
JASON: I’m gonna come home a bit late
“H-Hi…” he didn’t even know if he could hear his voice. Brad. How? How was he right there in front of him? Jason thought that he disappeared out of his life forever. He just seized to exist after high school ended.“Long time no see,” he gave a smile. It wasn’t exactly a smirk. But then again, it couldn’t have been a proper smile. It's Brad. “Yeah…” he mumbled, tapping his foot. He was hoping that his drinks would hurry up.“What have you been up to?”“Yeah, not much,” he hated small talk with him. It was painful. “I’m actually only just stopping by the city actually, then driving east,” he explained. Jason only half listened.“Oh yeah?”“Yeah. My boyfriend’s lives pretty east and I’m moving in with him.”Jason froze. Boyfriend. Did he just say? Boyfriend. No. His ears must’ve been clogged. Surely.“W-What?”“Jason? An espresso and a caramel frappuccino?” he leaned over stiffly and grabbed both drinks in his hands, feeling both the hot and the cold on his palms. “Um, yeah,” Brad scratched the back of his neck. “It was actually great running into you because I did want to apologise.”“...about what?” a million answers ran through his mind.“Literally everything,” he gave a small snicker, but it didn’t seem sinister like Jason expected. It sounded more regretful. “What did I do right during high school, honestly?” the shorter brunette glanced down. “So if you had a few moments to spare I’d love to just talk.”So he actually did. They took a table by the far corner, which made Jason uncomfortable, but maybe it was worth it. Truth be told, hearing a sorry was something Jason dreamed of. But it was something he thought he would never get.
MATT: is everything okay?
MATT: it’s been a while since you’ve replied
MATT: should I come down?
“I’m guessing you’re quite well off now, right?” Brad said lightheartedly. Jason put down his phone.“How can you tell?”“Well, first of all, you dress really nicely,” he commented. “And you live in a nice area. It’s virtually impossible to get a house around here.”“You can thank Matt’s family for that,” he chuckled. “Oh? You’re still with him?” yeah. Even with all the hell, you put us through. He shook his head. “That’s amazing to hear," Jason choked. "I was always secretly jealous of you two.”“What?” he scoffed. “Yeah, of course, I was. You two were great together. I bet you still are,” this whole dynamic with Brad made Jason incredibly uncomfortable. It was so foreign to him and he still felt the urge to coward away from him after all these years. “It actually gave me the courage to go out and find my own identity actually,” the brunette widened his eyes. “Seriously. My family hates me and I can never go back but, I’ve never been happier.”Jason cracked a genuine smile.“Well, I’m really happy for you,” “I’m happy for you too. Especially after everything I put you through,” he added. “It was literal hell and I can’t even wrap my head around the person I used to be.”"High school was hard, you know? I get it," he pressed his lips together. "Except high school was made harder for you because I was there," he took the words right out of Jason's mouth. "I'm honestly so, so sorry. I don't even want you to accept it. I just want you to know that I'm regretful about it, you know? That I thought over everything and I realised how horrible I was.""Well, your apology is accepted anyways."The door of the cafe suddenly flung open, the bell smashing against the wall. They all threw their heads over to the entrance. Jason sighed.Matt came running in, one of his shoes untied and only one of his arms actually wearing the jacket. The brunette laughed as he stumbled over to their table. Typical Matt. “What’s wrong?” he asked, puffing to catch his breath.“Nothing,” Jason pushed over the drink towards him. “There you go. You probably need it."“Thanks,” he laughed stiffly, collapsing onto a chair. He took a single sip before turning his attention over to Brad. He nearly spat it out. “B-Brad?”“Hey,” he grinned. “Shit um," he panicked. "We’ve got shit to do Jason,” he ushered. “Remember? We like, left the stove on. We’ve gotta—”“No it’s fine Matt,” his husband reassured, cutting him off. Matt blankly stared. “No, no I’ve got to start heading off anyway,” Brad reached out his hand and Jason gladly shook it. “I’ve got to head down to my boyfriend’s so..."Matt blinked. “Wait—”“Yeah have a safe trip,” Jason waved goodbye. Maybe this was the final time he would see Brad. Once and for all. At least he got closure though, that's all he wanted. And an apology. He took a nice long sip of his drink, the coolness rushing down his throat. “Are we going to talk about this or…?” Matt asked in disbelief. “Maybe when we get home.”
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
This chapter is just for me to vent everything I feel about my own story...? Though I still love it, it’s nearly been two years so I obviously have some feelings towards it (Both positive and negative) which I will explore through this chapter. Fun fact: before starting Sad Boy, I wondered whether I should make it a fanfic or not. I was pretty sure that I’d just write this as a stand-alone story (so just fiction) but I was also interested to see if people would enjoy it if I wrote it, and so I made it into fanfiction because I knew I’d have a bigger audience that way. I’m glad it got this much recognition, honestly. Thanks guys <3 Maybe these are my unpopular opinions about my own work? Haha. I hated Roy times
It’s not that I completely hated Roy or anything, but I was a little surprised when I received so many comments about fans loving Roy. I actually think that he might be the most popular character. I guess there were parts of his character that I didn’t like, like how obsessive he was over Danny at times. That’s mostly it. I liked other flaws about him, like how full of himself he was and all that. Weird opinion maybe. Was Danny toxic?
Though I loved the way Danny was presented, there were moments where I thought...wait is that bad? Especially when he tried to kiss Max. Just to get over Roy. In a deleted chapter (that I might upload) they did end up kissing and it led to drama (shocking I know). Maybe I should upload it. Who knows?I wasted Kurtis
I feel bad for Kurtis after reading over it. While every other boy (even Roy) had backstories and character development and all that, I felt like Kurtis lacked a storyline. I think that he did change by the end of the story (especially after Matt’s funeral) but I wish he actually had his own storyline. Maybe I’ll upload deleted chapters of that. I’m wondering whether I should. I can't tell whether Jason and Matt are a good couple or a bad one
I actually think they might be my second favourite couple (ooh find out what my favourite one is later) but there were moments that were really toxic. Like how much of an enabler Jason was and how Matt lied all the time. I just don’t think I represented a good relationship. I don’t know. Thoughts?Max is like overly stubborn. But I think I like it
Max can be annoying sometimes. But I still think that he’s my favourite character. Seriously. He's such a sweetheart. Is Matt actually a bad person?
He lied about taking drugs 3 times and only stopped when he had an overdose. Even though that was probably my favourite arc (?) in the story, I started realising that he might be a bad person. I don’t know. Also thoughts?I wasted Witney and also Willam
I wish I included them more. Honestly. They were cute. And I felt like I left them unattended a lot in the story. I think I might include some deleted chapters later. Also Willam. Wow, I wasted her. She's hilarious. Max and Kurtis are my favourite couple
Yes, very last controversial (?) opinion. I think that they’re cute together. I also love slow burns, and their slow burn was like 120 chapters long. I kind of love that. Feel free to say what you love, what you didn't like as much, and all that jazz in the comments. I'm thinking of posting a deleted chapter soon! Love ya
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
Max leaned against the railing of his small verandah. It was a tiny block of space, but he felt more than comfortable. He watched the cars zoom underneath him, trying to get home before the sunset. Probably get home to their families.He gazed at towards the setting sun, the orange sky, and pondered about how his family was. What they were doing and where they were at. The last time he talked to them, they forced him out of their house.He still remembered it vividly. He never really went home since studying at university took up most of his time. The only person he ever saw was Kurtis, who was incredibly nice about his whole situation. He’d cook him meals, and though he was really bad at it at first, he eventually became a lot better, and before they knew it, Kurtis was the chef of the household. He even did all the chores around the house too, considering he only studied part-time so he had some spare time on his hands. That’s probably why they decided to start a relationship. There wasn’t a distinct day where they started dating. It just seemed to happen naturally. That’s also the reason why Max decided to bring him home to his parents. It was the Christmas holidays, which is when Max usually went back home. Kurtis only went every two years, depending on whether his parents were busy or not. Plus, Kurtis never seemed to like them all too much anyway.The odd thing about Max was that, no matter how strict his parents were and how protective they were, he still loved them unconditionally. They were the reason why he made it into a world-renowned university, and why he was considered a gifted musician. He could never not love his parents. So that’s why he decided to tell them about him. More specifically, his sexuality. Which was a huge part of his identity that he never mentioned and that they didn’t catch onto. He still remembered the face they put on when they opened the door. Complete confusion as to why Kurtis was there. He hastily rushed for an excuse, saying that Kurtis’s parents were busy so he couldn’t spend Christmas with them. But afterwards, he had to actually tell them the truth. That Kurtis was his boyfriend. And that he was gay.Their faces dropped. And the atmosphere of the room was completely sucked out. There was a lot of screaming that night. A lot from his dad, virtually none from his mom. But also a lot from Kurtis too, trying to support Max as he sat there on the verge of tears.
“God! I wish I was never fucking born!”
Were the last words Max said before slamming the door shut. He never thought that he'd ever say those words. Out loud at least, but he couldn't help it. He thought that his dad would come rushing after him, probably beating him. But he didn’t. The couple just trailed back to their car which was nearly snowed in and sat in complete silence for a moment.Max could feel the anger boiling in his chest. But simultaneously, it felt like tears nearly on the edge of pouring from his eyes. He felt confused. Angry. Sad. Regretful, maybe. Somewhat reluctant. Mostly frustrated. “I’m glad that you were born,” was the first thing Kurtis said, breaking the silence. Max chuckled through his tears. “Thanks,” he squinted and picked at his eyes. “I’m being serious,” he shifted his attention to him. “You’re the best thing that’s ever happened to me, Max,” the grey-haired male widened his eyes just a tad. “You’re brilliant. Smart, talented, selfless, generous and loving. They can’t ever take that away from you.”“Thanks, Kurt,” he sighed deeply. “But they’re my family. I don’t know what to feel about this.’“Are they your family though?” he contested and Max raised an eyebrow. “A family’s supposed to take care of you. Love you no matter what. Be there for you when you need it most,” he listed. “Why do you call them family when they’re being so awful to you? You’re who you are. And you’re enough.”He leaned in subtly, but Max was the one to lean in the most to give him a light kiss on his lips. It tasted salty, as warm tears travelled down his cheeks. He wanted to explode. Kurtis held his cheeks ever so softly, and Max could feel the softness of his coat sleeve.When they parted, they just decided to pull in at a motel on the other side of town and get take away. It wasn’t the most picturesque Christmas, but it was enough for them. They wrapped themselves in blankets and watched the snow as music played softly in the background.
“Max?”
He turned his head to find Kurtis waiting inside for him at the apartment, smiling widely. It was their 1 year anniversary. Maybe. They decided to make up a date for when they started dating so they had an excuse to celebrate. He laughed to himself as he stepped inside, joining his partner by the sofa.“Happy anniversary,” Kurtis lightly planted a kiss on his cheek before revealing his present from behind his back. Max brightened instantly.“A photobook?” he was such a sucker for the cliche, romance-y stuff. His face burned his excitement. He flipped through. There were photos of them on that one holiday they took together a couple of months ago where they drove around the country. Some from that time Max had a solo performance in another state and they decided to drive down. A lot from just their domestic lives; cooking, cleaning, watching TV and lying in bed. He giggled.But at the end of the book, he was bombarded with pictures from his childhood. Ones of him and Matt when they were just little kids. His first crush. The picture was obviously taken when they weren’t paying attention. It was the two of them running in Matt’s backyard, playing around with toy planes. And then there were ones of the four of them together. Memories were coming back to him. “No! We need to take a picture for this moment!” prepubescent Jason whined, holding the camera to their face.“I hate pictures,” Max groaned, but he took the picture anyway. They were at the milkshake place down the street from the school. Slurping on ice chocolates in the middle of summer was the most nostalgic thing he could think of. There was another of the four of them at their first annual ball when they were juniors. All in matching suits, looking like a boy band. A very flamboyant one at that. The flash was too bright so most of them were blinking. It brought a smile to Max’s face. He flipped to another page and found a picture of five of them. Danny. His second crush.The first picture was of the five of them at Jason’s house. It must’ve been that day when they egged Brad’s house. Where was Brad? —Max wondered for a moment. It was Kurtis, Jason and Danny taking a selfie on the sofa, and you could just see Matt and Max’s face in the corner of the frame. There were a few pictures at the annual ball. One was Danny, Kurtis and him at Danny’s house. They took a picture together because Danny’s mom seemed all too excited about her little boy going to a dance. He looked really dapper that day. And there’s another where it’s all five of them after everything was wrapping up, and they decided to take a picture with the photographer. It wasn’t Jason but it was Violet and she was looking as gorgeous as ever. They looked tired but so happy to be together. And that was the last picture of the night.Then there was a picture of them in the city trip. One of Matt driving with Jason in the front seat, and he took a selfie of all of them together, smiling like goofs. And there was another with them at the expensive restaurant where they ate that night. All of them dressed up and sipping lemonade from wine glasses. There was a selfie of Kurtis and Danny in the hotel room. You could just see Danny’s forehead and also Max in the top right corner, brushing his teeth. Present day Max laughed a little when he saw it. There was a photo of them at the Conservatorium of Music, right after Max’s solo performance. All five of them were in half ironed suits, except Max’s of course, his was perfect, and they were all positioned stiffly. It must’ve been Max’s mom who decided to take that picture, gathering from their awkward smiles. And a selfie at the gay club they snuck into. With Kurtis lipsynching to the song playing and looking stupid in the photo. And Max just in the middle of a fit of laughter. The floor underneath them is colourful and glowing. It’s brightened their faces rainbow. Max gasped at the next photo. It was a picture taken of them at the hospital after Matt’s overdose. When he was recovering. He was still in a wheelchair, looking sickly pale and his eyes a little sunken in, but he still had a smile on his face. Along with the others, with grinning through their bloodshot eyes and dried tears. He then flipped to the next page, as if the story was finishing. One at their graduation. The one that Courtney took all those years ago. The funniest face was Danny’s; he was looking so timid and awkward in the centre. Not like the rest of them looked that great either. A mix of smiles and tears.“Aw, Kurt,” he gushed, nearly closing the book. Kurtis just cut in and place his hand underneath.“But you haven’t seen the back yet,” he said, his grin widening. Max giggled and flipped to the very back. There was one last picture plastered at the back. It was just the five of them looking incredibly casual. Nothing particularly special about it. They were by the grass oval that they sat at every single break, and it was just a regular picture. No special occasion.But then again, maybe that's what was special about it, Max thought. How it was just casual. Just them. Taking away all the drama. It was Jason in his cheerleading uniform, seating closely to Matt, who had his arm around Jason's shoulder and a leather jacket draped over his body. Next to them was Danny in his dark clothes and ripped jeans, half smiling at the camera. And Kurtis, wearing an assortment of Auburn clothing, complimenting well with Max's dull button-up shirt and sweater. It was so casual, yet so special because that was the reality for teenage Max. The five of them together. Everyday. Just chatting like normal friends. He gently closed the book and gazed over to Kurtis, who had a smile that stretched from ear to ear. He chuckled."That was the best present I've ever gotten," he smiled, pecking him lightly. "I know," Kurtis cocked a shoulder. "Happy anniversary.""Happy anniversary."
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
Roy sometimes wondered how he got here. Wondered how he got to this age, looking at the darkly lit world with a mug of coffee. He sighed.One of the earliest moments he remembered was when he first met Danny. He could remembered little Danny so well that it felt like they met yesterday. He remembered how small he was, with his chubby cheeks and big eyes. He was just so cute...of course Roy had to look after him. Of course he had to protect him from everything. Because he wanted him safe. He wanted to preserve his laughter. Like that one time they went out to school camp when they were 10. It was one of his favourite memories. It’s what you expected — mosquitoes everywhere, hot and humid cabins and scary stories.Little Danny was adventurous. Roy was a scared yet excited little kid that agreed to everything he said because he just admired him. In the middle of the night, they fetched their little flashlights and ventured out into the night, Danny tucked right behind Roy as they ran into the forest. Their younger selves giggled to themselves, adrenaline fueling their bodies. “I can’t believe we did that!” little Danny said, short on breath.“I know!” Roy squealed, holding his hands to guide him. Well, that’s what Roy told himself anyway. “What do you want to do now?”There was a moment of silence. The buzzing of bugs and shuffling feet in the grass echoed through the night. Everything was dark around them except the full moon above them. Danny pondered, “I want to see the fireflies.”Roy shrugged, “Well let’s try and find some.”It must’ve been twenty minutes, maybe thirty minutes, when the two young boys sat down at the root of a tree, helpless. Roy wondered if they could get out. Actually, maybe he didn’t care. Maybe he liked just being there with Danny, protecting him and making sure that he’s okay. Until he saw them.“Danny, Danny,” Roy nudged Danny lightly, who was fast asleep on his shoulder. His face blushed. Danny’s lips were slightly parted as he snored quietly. He was fast asleep. Bringing an arm around him, he held him tightly by his side, watching the fireflies by himself as they danced in front of him. That’s when he really started falling for him.Or maybe it’s when Roy admired Danny from his room for years and years, seeing him in the living room with his mom, sipping tea and lively talking to her. Or maybe it’s when he admired Danny in his pajamas, sometimes sneaking out to watch TV in the middle of the night. Or maybe it’s when Danny knocked on his front door one time, hoping to save Courtney together. It’s in those moments — when Danny was the most casual, when he really started to get to know him.Flash forward to when they were adults, packing boxes and moving into their old, run down apartment near the city. Danny had a lot of stuff. A lot. But so did Roy. A lot. And they’d laugh about it while unpacking all their stuff; from bed frames to cabinets to stage sets to music sheets. Everything was just thrown everywhere, and they were slowly making their way through all the junk. Danny would laugh that it was their garbage wonderland. Roy would laugh too. Then they would make shit coffee and sip it while watching the lights flash by in the seemingly quiet city. But not everything was sunshine and rainbows. Danny and Roy fought. Sometimes a lot. In a new world where there was constant change and uncertainty, it left the boys confused, nervous and on edge. Firstly, they had monetary issues — with no real jobs and no steady income, they were scared to live on the streets. Secondly, they were so far away from what they grew up with; with what they knew. No mom. No dad. No friends. They were all alone, ironically, in the heavily populated city.With all that said, everything did work out in the end. Roy eventually became a drama teacher in a nearby town. Sometimes he sewed to make extra bucks on the side. Danny continued as a bar singer at Willam’s bar. Little did they know that one song would hit internationally, selling millions. “Sad Boy”. The alternative title track that Danny had recorded in a shitty, run down recording studio. He didn’t expect it to blow up. No one did. But they didn’t complain about travelling internationally, seeing the world, performing to millions. ‘But that was years ago,’ Roy said to himself, lowering his mug of coffee onto the table. He eyed his living room, the one that he had been sitting in for the last three years now. They moved out from the city a while ago, moving into a quieter neighbourhood. Now they lived in a comfortable home, one that had white picket fences and a beautiful garden. It somewhat resembled the houses they used to live in, but with more character and colour. Roy sighed, got up and walked himself down the hallway, watching all the pictures up on the walls. The new photographs that Kurtis took for them at their wedding to Danny at his gigs, all the way to their biggest, most prized person in the world.He entered the bedroom, the fairy lights still on inside. He lowly laughed to himself. All the walls were decorated with doodles, mostly messy ones but they were coming together. It reminded Roy of little Danny that loved to draw everywhere and anywhere. Bonnie would get mad and scold him but Danny couldn't help it. He wanted to share his creativity with the world.His husband had fallen asleep next to the bed. Danny was supposed to read a bedtime story to their very special person, but he always seemed to fall asleep while doing it. Roy snickered. That "very special person" was called Andreas. Andy for short. The cutest, most creative kid they knew. And their absolute prize possession. He leaned down and pressed a kiss on him, tucking the 6 year old even tighter in his rocket-ship-shaped bed. Roy then walked to the corner of the room, fetching a blanket, and draping it over Danny, who seemed completely knocked out. Roy rolled his eyes but was quick to laugh it off.“You never change, do you?” he whispered down, even though Danny couldn’t hear him. “You’re still the same little Danny from all those years ago.”
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a thousand cuts
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{
"Archive Warning": "Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings",
"Category": "F/M",
"Characters": "Female Ryder | Sara, Reyes Vidal",
"Fandom": "Mass Effect: Andromeda",
"Language": "English",
"Rating": "Mature",
"author": "by nymja",
"chapters": "5/?",
"completed": "",
"published": "2017-04-08T00:00:00",
"words": "10,159",
"Additional Tags": "Nerdy Gumption Sara, Smitten Reyes, Break Up, Post-Break Up, spoilers through the end of the game, Local Criminal \"Dates\" Galactic Hero, Slowish burn with some pining, Reyes POV, Slight Canon Divergence",
"Relationship": "Female Ryder | Sara/Reyes Vidal",
"Character": null,
"Relationships": null,
"Series": null,
"Collections": null,
"Fandoms": null,
"Archive Warnings": null,
"Categories": null,
"Bookmarks": null,
"Chapters": null,
"Comments": null,
"Completed": null,
"Hits": null,
"Kudos": null,
"Published": null,
"Words": null,
"Updated": null
}
|
The first rule for smuggling is to never be surprised by anything. This one, he thinks, is not going to last long. The young woman walks into the place like she doesn’t know it, eyes scanning from person to person. Over a few she hesitates, all questions in her eyes. He can imagine it now-- Who are you? maybe, or something like Tell me about life in Kadara. Curiosity is charming just as long as it doesn’t get somebody shot.From his place in the corner, Reyes watches the Pathfinder watch. Her attention’s completely held by Umi and a Krogan patron going at it over an unresolved tab. He suspects, based on intel and his own eyes, that this “Sara Ryder” is usually someone shot at. …It would be best to make this exchange as quickly as possible. For all the prestige afforded the Pathfinder rank in this galaxy, there’s no desire to associate with someone interested in such a mundane thing as a knife in the counter of a bar. His mind skips over the Pathfinder, factors the pros and cons in establishing a working relationship, and crosses her off the list. But, he’s still a professional. And the Angaran have tenuous feelings toward “the mouth” at best. He smooths his hair to the left, and puts on his most amiable face. Showtime. Every move is well rehearsed. The sauntered pace, the one hand carelessly on the bar. He makes it sound like there’s a smile on his face (even if there’s not), as he walks up and takes the space to her left. “You look like you’re waiting for someone.” Up close, he does a more careful read. Pale skin, large blue eyes that he suspects (perhaps uncharitably) are always wide. And a…quaint ponytail, the end of it brushing against the scarf around her neck. She’s on a field trip. Discretely, he flicks two of the fingers resting against the bar. Umi, as she is, returns the subtle gesture by slamming two metal glasses on the counter with the grace of a drunken elcor. The Asari makes direct contact with his eyes before narrowing hers. Reyes offers a small smile before taking one and offering the other to his short-term compatriot. The Pathfinder’s brows raise. “I’ve got time for a drink.” And then she takes it from him—a strange, unintroduced man in Kadara Port—and clinks the cup against his before drinking a greedy, long pull. He. He has no words. Reyes feigns a drink from his own glass, scrutinizing her over its rim. All of his suspicious were proven so foundationally correct with that one action. It’s making him doubt himself. Maybe she’s not naïve or foolhardy. Maybe she believes herself invincible. Which would make associating with her far, far more trouble than it was worth. Recovery is seamless. He sets his glass down on the counter once more, reaches for her hand. “Shena, but you can call me Reyes.” She takes his hand for a shake. Her grip is…floppy. “I hate codenames.” “Uh.” Her hand drops, his follows suit. “I was expecting someone more…Angaran.” He forces his best chuckle. “The Resistance pays me to supply information—among other things.” “So you’re a smuggler.” Reyes stares at her. He detects the slight hint of an edge with the statement, put so bluntly and simplistically that he truly does not know how to react. He has dealt with the no bullshitter type on Kadara, of course. But statements made by them were meant to provoke. That was just…an observation. Maybe a distasteful observation. Reyes takes a step away from the bar, knowing movement will help redirect his thoughts. Put them back on track. He’s wasted enough time—the conversation needs to go to the job. “Your man—Vehn Terev—was arrested by Sloane Kelly, leader of the Outcasts. Word spread about what he did to Moshae Sjefa.” He watches her carefully from the corner of his eyes. “The people are calling for his execution. And Sloane? She’s a woman of the people.” “I like her already.” He doubts, very much, that there is someone this Pathfinder doesn’t like. “Well. She doesn’t like you.” Her wide eyes blink. “She’s never met me.” It is difficult, truly, to stop the snort. But he manages. As if that mattered. Fiddling his fingers, a rare tell, he does his best to spell it out as directly as he can. “You work for the Initiative. Sloane was part of the uprising on Nexus. I doubt she’ll give up Vehn easily.” The Pathfinder seems to sit with that for a moment, and Reyes expects her to ask for his help- Her chin tilts up a little. “I’m taking him—with or without her permission.” Reyes is going to give her an hour on Kadara. Perhaps two. Despite himself, he leans in. The confused amusement he honestly feels escapes into his words. “We’re going to be friends, you and I.” It occurs to him, then, that while he has been observing the Pathfinder she has been observing him. Not in the subtle, calculating way he uses, or the hostile, narrow manner of Umi. Instead, she focuses straight at him—unwavering. There’s an interest on her part, though not the kind he typically intends to attract. Just. Open. He clears his throat. “There might be another way to get to Vehn. You work Sloane. I’ll talk to the Resistance.” She stares at him. He looks back.For some reason, his collar is unbearably tight. Best to go. He steps away, turning around without a goodbye. Barely gone five paces when he hears her voice calling out to him. “How do I contact you if things go south?” He pauses. Takes a breath. Reyes highly doubts there’s an “if” in this equation. He also doubts that the Pathfinder will survive long enough to come back to this bar. Time to give the honest answer. Reyes does a half turn, winks, and makes his leave. He won’t be seeing her again.For the best, he's sure.
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
There’s been another murder. Reyes watches the gathering crowd discretely from his place by the merchant’s, making a show of scrolling through the console’s inventory. The dead Angara had been laying outside the supplies vendor for a little over an hour by his count, and reactions so far had been…disappointing. A body in the streets of Kadara was little more than gossip fuel, supported by several exiles making their way around the supine, bloodied corpse without a pause in their step. Murdered Angara were not to his advantage. Absently, Reyes began to purchase some new weapon mods as he kept an ear trained on the small crowd gathering. Already, he could make out…problematic accusations. “Bet the Collective is behind this.” “What, why?” “Body showed up in Sloane’s territory, dinnit it? Practically on her door step-“ No. This wouldn’t do. A man was nothing without his reputation, and Reyes couldn't have the Charlatan's be so...sloppy. “2,300 credits.” Reyes looks up from the monitor, certain he didn’t hear the cost correctly. “For a scope?” The Salarian’s eyes blink. One at a time. “Remember the upcharge on the last set of smuggled goods sold to me, Vidal. Upcharge in return—make square deal.” Reyes makes a noncommittal hum, though he tries quickly to place the merchant’s name. Torkin? Morkin? “Surely, we can come to a better compromise than this?” “3,000.” “You wound me.” The Salarian does not seem to care. Reyes sighs, punching a few keys into his omni-tool. “I suppose a deal can be arranged…” His words drop off as he hears a new voice in the background: “It’s not that bad, Jaal.” It takes him a minute to register the newcomer. He combs his internal database, registering a ponytail and wide eyes. The Pathfinder. Still somehow alive—the thought makes him want to smile in amusement. Reyes transfers credits to the Salarian. “Keep the change.” “Hmph,” Borkin replies. Not moving from his spot in the shadows, Reyes leans against the bar of the vendor, crossing his arms over his chest and placing one foot over the other. Across the marketplace, the Pathfinder’s too-white armor glints in the sun, her comparatively tiny body flanked on either side by a grizzled Krogan in yellow and an Angara in blue who looks as though he’s desperately trying not to touch anything. It’s the latter that she appears to be in a debate with. “There’s a corpse in the street, Sara,” the Angara explains patiently. “A what- Shit!” The laugh escapes Reyes before he can think better of it, as he watches the Pathfinder quite literally trip over the corpse. The toe of her boot catches its sprawled arm, her body pitching forward. It’s only the quick reaction time from her Angara companion that stops her from faceplanting against the grated street. He holds her for a moment too long before releasing her, and Reyes wonders how completely oblivious the Pathfinder is to her companion’s affections. Or if they're returned. “Thanks,” she mutters, taking only a second to straighten herself out before she turns to the corpse. Reyes watches with interest, curious as to what this one’s reaction will be. “Murder,” Sara says—though he’s not sure who she’s speaking to. “Angara.” Then, her omni-tool does something…intriguing. Orange light emits from it, tracing over the body with a beep. She goes to question one of the guards- …and Reyes thinks he’s seen enough. An idea starts to form in his mind. That was one expensive piece of tech. Perhaps the Pathfinder could still be of assistance to him. Hopefully, the woman hadn’t made any other friends in the port—his offer to her, made completely altruistically of course, was still on the table. “You buying something else?” Borkin asks, and Reyes turns just in time to see his tongue wipe up toward his nose. “No,” he smiles, “I think I’m done browsing for now.” -- It would be best practice, he knows, to stop asking questions about her. But despite himself, ever since learning that the Pathfinder had curtsied to Sloane, she’d gone from lost cause to something of a miracle—in that she was still alive, of course. Maybe a curiosity, if he was feeling charitable. Reyes, however, could not stop thinking about the tech. “What do you know of the girl I was with the other day?” He asks Umi, whose upper lip pulls at the question. “Who? The Pathfinder?” She doesn’t look up from the glass she’s cleaning, thoroughly unimpressed with him as she always is. “I know she wasn’t happy you stiffed her with the bill.” Reyes makes an amused hum. He had almost forgotten about that—typically, it was one of his old moves to get people to remember him. People he was interested in. He thought about the Pathfinder again, mentally saw her re-tripping over the corpse. …Perhaps he had done it subconsciously. Like muscle memory. “And I know she and that Krogan fucked up my bar in their little brawl.” That made him pause. He recalled the one in yellow from the marketplace. “The Krogan?” “And the Pathfinder, yeah. Though they paid for the damage, unlike some people.” She fixes him with a pointed stare, and Reyes lets out a small sigh. “I really thought we put the McConnell Job behind us, my dear Umi.” “Pay your damn tab, Vidal.” Wordlessly, he signals his omnitool and transfers credits over to her—4,000 of them. Umi huffs, slightly appeased. “Tell me more about the fight,” Reyes probes. She snorts. “Why, sweet on her? Don’t bother.” While he is somewhat curious to why the Asari firmly believes he shouldn’t bother, he presses forward and the lie falls smoothly. “Could use some help on a run. It might be good to get an outsider’s perspective. If they can hold their weight in a fight, of course.” Umi’s hands still on the glass she’s cleaning, gaze spectating. Finally, she lets go of a sigh. “Give her a try, I hear she’s good at surprising people.” Reyes considers this carefully, then gives a small nod before ordering another drink. The Asari shakes her head as she hands it to him. “Though she probably won’t last long here if she keeps drinking everything I hand her.” Reyes feels a smile briefly cross his face before he takes a sip of his own, remembering that he still owed her one. -- Tartarus is an ideal place for him. Not because of the lights, drinks, and certainly not the food, but because of the noise. Music pulses from every corner, people’s conversations thoroughly drowned out. The red lights which highlight the dancing cages pulse in turn, causing a disorienting effect. He stops by the bar before heading to his customary room. “If it isn’t my favorite bartender,” he greets smoothly. Kian smiles, not pausing from mixing a martini for a nearby Turian. “What do you want?” He asks good-naturedly, the garish lights from the club casting shadows along his profile. Reyes transfers the man 400 credits—it’s beginning to become an expensive day. “The Pathfinder will be making her way here soon, see that she finds me with minimal trouble.” Kian glances at his omnitool as he pours the drink. “Aren’t you generous today.” He gives him his best grin, happy to see a quick effect on the man. “Curious, more like.” “About the Pathfinder?” “Perhaps.” Kian looks skeptical, but taps the acceptance of the transfer. “I’ll send her to your room, then?” The Turian receiving the martini casts them both an interested look. Reyes gives a customary laugh accompanied by a wink. “No, no. Let her find me.” Kian rolls his eyes, but gives a brief salute that’s just a tad too rehearsed for a civilian. -- She takes longer than he expects. Reyes can only imagine her options for intel on this planet were limited, and part of him feels…put out? At having to wait for her to volunteer her services to him. If what he suspects about the woman is right, the Pathfinder will no doubt be wanting to solve the big case. Her curiosity somehow both delightful, amusing, and oh so entirely reckless. It is late into the night and also his second drink when he hears the automated hiss of his room’s door. He watches carefully from his place on the couch, making a show of being distracted by an unimportant call. The Pathfinder is…breathless. Her chest heaves in small movements under her armor, cheeks pink and hair slightly tousled. If he didn’t know any better, he would suspect she just- The Krogan and the Angara charge in after her. -ran. Yes, he supposes that makes more sense in this situation. He carefully moves his gaze from her chest before she thinks to accuse him of something ungentlemanly. Her expression is hard for him to decipher, not quite excited. Determined? There is something about her that is now harder to read than it was their first meeting. But Reyes suspects she is no less gullible than before. Only phenomenally lucky. Luck, he can use. “Ryder!” He stands to greet her, the perfect host to her version of Kadara. “Glad you’re here, I’m sure you’ve heard about the murders.” Perhaps because he saw her trip over one. Her lips part, everything about her so undeniably animated. “There’s a fresh body outside of Kralla’s.” A bar she has apparently become a local of. “Some of the locals say it’s the Charlatan’s handiwork.” He has to breathe in for a count of three. You’re a neutral party, he reminds himself. “I don’t buy it. The Charlatan is discrete, careful,” Handsome, “whoever did this wanted the bodies found.” They chat, for a bit. Her, throwing out every possible theory she can think of. Him, gently correcting and prompting her along to the path he wants her to find. The woman is impulsive, to say the least. Accusing the Charlatan, then Sloane, before he directs her into considering the Roekaar. She…trusts him. Everything he says, she takes in, absorbs. Believes. He has had easy marks before, but something about this one feels like sand underneath his boots—one false step, and he’ll lose whatever traction he has. Her compatriots remain silent by her side, watching. The Krogan and Angara both, he thinks, won’t hesitate to shoot him. When he finally feels confident in her support of his conclusion, he makes his move. “The problem is that I’ve got no proof, and the Resistance doesn’t want to antagonize the Roekaar.” She tucks a piece of hair behind her ear. His eyes drift to her neck. “Guess that’s where I come in?” And where I see if you’re worth keeping around. “I need that fancy AI of yours to scan for evidence that could implicate the Roekaar.” It says so much that she doesn’t react. She doesn’t try to hide the fact that she has privileged tech to a thief, or wonder how he knows this information on his own. Instead she continues the conversation, seamless and seemingly without guile. Then, he makes his roll of the dice. Reyes is a gambling man, and he thinks he knows the argument that will sell her. “People are scared, Ryder. This is your opportunity to win friends in Kadara Port.” Her response…throws him. Meeting his eyes, she smiles. It’s a small thing, a bare tug in the corner of her lip. But he watches it, and her tone shifts, just barely. “I sound pretty integral to this plan.” If she was anyone else in Tartarus, he might interpret it as a pass. But she couldn’t possibly… He keeps his voice flat. “SAM is integral.” And, because he honestly cannot help himself. “You’re a bonus.” She doesn’t react to the second part. And he pointedly doesn’t feel disappointment. “Hey, I haven’t agreed to help you yet.” You did when you found this room. He leans in, giving the best impression of an amiable ally. “I feel good about my chances.” She looks up at him. He stares for a moment, before continuing on with the act. “Give me a call when you get there.” And, because this suddenly feels too close and he is very aware of her still-flushed cheeks, he sits back in the couch. A clear dismissal. The Pathfinder continues to stare at him, her head tilting to the side. He doesn’t like that he feels appraised. Finally, she smiles, wide and showing her teeth—it’s so genuine that it makes him uncomfortable. “Alright, we’ll stop them.” She brings up her armored hand, wiggles a few of her fingers in a wave. “Wait for my call.” He nods, and she is running out the door again. As soon as she’s gone, he finishes his drink, and his eyes stay on the spot where she stood. His head tilts back to rest against the sofa. The Pathfinder is always on the move. He supposes he can respect that—especially since it’s toward his advantage. The thought crosses his mind that he hopes she survives the Badlands, but the gambling side of him doesn’t put much faith in it.
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
She hasn’t called. Which shouldn’t matter. But as he lifts his upper body from the floor his eyes dart to the discarded omni-tool resting on top of a storage crate. Its screen is disappointingly blank. Reyes falls back into his sit-up. Exhales. Lifts his body again. 96… The lack of forward momentum on the Roekkar case is going to have severe complications for him later.
97.
The least she could do is check in. As a professional courtesy.
98.
Unless she had been killed, of course.
99.
He supposes it would be unreasonable of him to expect a call if she had been murdered.
100.
His eyes moved to the omni-tool again. Still blank. He took another long exhale before continuing his sit-up count.
101.
It was also possible that she had simply…blown his request off.
102.
Which meant he had misread her.
103.
Which he simply did not do. If he misread someone like the Pathfinder, he was cutting serious corners in his approach.
104.
He entertains, briefly, the thought of hailing her comm first. See how the investigation is proceeding.
105.
Or if she’s been murdered. But he doesn’t think Reyes Vidal, smuggler, would have such a concentrated investment.
107.
Unlike the Charlatan, the man being framed for said murders.
108.
No. He couldn’t call. This had to play delicately or not at all.
109.
But he also couldn’t wait.
110.
Reyes stills, his abdomen still lifting up and down in slow movements as he attempts to catch his breath. He runs a hand through his now unkempt hair, fixing it back into place as he presses his lips into a thin line. Eventually, he comes to the rational conclusion that the delay is his fault. It was an essential rule of business that one didn’t outsource to a partner who had no skin in the game. The Pathfinder, for all her wide eyes and bouncy ponytails, couldn’t be depended on to follow through on Kadara matters. Disappointing. But not worth becoming angry over. You didn’t even pay her, reminds a nagging corner of his thoughts. He hadn’t. In retrospect, the task had been handled poorly. Reyes’ lips morph into a frown—he was usually more careful in these matters. He stands, brushing off the dirt from the warehouse floor. The space is one of his many rented ones, off grid and off books. And naturally immune to Sloane’s protection charges. He grabs the towel next to the omni-tool, wiping at his neck, arms, and chest as a solution works itself through his mind. Trusting the Pathfinder to do this efficiently had been a mistake. Oversight, on his part. There was no remedying that now. Reyes shrugged on his underlay shirt. There is also no point dwelling on something he can do himself. -- Asking a direct question on Kadara has three potential outcomes. One, the inquirer could be shot. Two, they could be laughed at. Three, they could be shot. The best approach was to leave the breadcrumbs, have some sort of carrot prepared to feed intel in. Reyes is quite skilled at that, but that approach also takes time. Finesse. The first he does not have, the second he is never without. So in these trying times, he must resort to calling in favors. “You’ve been busy,” Keema greets without preamble, her voice carrying its usual light amusement. Reyes smiles up at the console screen. On its other end, Keema stands, her image somewhat grainy. The Angara representative to Sloane, naturally, seems to have been expecting him. “As you know, I’m a fan of keeping my hands occupied.” She makes a sound crossed somewhere between a sigh and a laugh, but returns the smile. “To what do I owe an untraceable call?” Reyes’ smile remains in place, his tone playful. “I hear there’s been some littering in the marketplace. Sloane can’t be pleased.” Keema’s expression flickers from amiable to drawn, then back again. “Yes…though I imagine it will be thrown out eventually.” He leans against the console, crossing his arms loosely in front of his chest. “Then tell me where to find the nicest dump.” -- Roughly two hours later, navpoints are patched through to his omni-tool. The receiver channel is scrambled, much like the account that Reyes transfers credits to, but both belong to Keema. It’s good to have friends in convenient places. The Roekkar hideout is, unfortunately, not as convenient. It’s a two-day trek through the Badlands before Reyes comes into range, another two days to case the entrance to the caverns. It’s in the middle of the second day when he hears a burst through his comm channel. “Reyes, I’m at the crime scene.” It’s her. The Pathfinder. He does not startle. Rather, he quickly retreats from his surveillance point, ducking down behind shrubbery. As though he were a child attempting to avoid being caught by a parent for curfew. Or a group of murderous, human-hating angara. The point stood, either way. It is relief that forms the smile on his face when he hails her in return. Perhaps she isn’t quite worthless. “Great. I’ve got intel on our dead guy.” Which he had also paid Keema a rather high amount of credits for. “Krogan male. Went by the name of Zear.” And, because he is a detail man at heart: “Frontal plate was pried off before he was shot to death.” “Poor bastard.” Then, the Krogan: “Not one of mine.” There is no time for condolences. It’s clear that something as simple as a civilian murder will detract the Pathfinder from the role he needs her to play. So he course corrects. “Do your scanning thing. Look for anything that might lead us to the killer.” There’s the sound of chirping on the other side. “Angaran footprints lead this way,” she informs him. He bites the inside of his cheek. He cannot see which way from a comm link. “See where they go.” More chirping. “A knife. Killer must’ve dropped it during the getaway. Something’s carved into the blade.” A blunt murder instrument? Dramatic. And amateur clean-up at best. He hears someone speaking in the background—the Pathfinder’s angaran companion?—before the voice of an AI cuts across it. “We do not know if the wielder was angaran. An exile could have stolen the blade.” Except, of course, Reyes did know. “It’s a start.” The AI sounds again. “These footsteps are distinctly angaran.” Yes. Reyes knows. The Pathfinder replies to the AI before Reyes can. “I can count at least three attackers. The tracks look like an ambush.” Reyes stares down at the three Roekkar moving to and from their base below his vantage point on the hill. “Fits the Roekkar profile.” She is getting mired in the details. He decides it’s time for another prod. “Keep scanning. We need hard evidence.” Another chirp. The Pathfinder’s voice is calm. “Angaran blood near the corpse. Matches your Roekkar theory, Reyes.” He smiles. Sounds like DNA evidence. The AI contributes, “This DNA along with the inscription and footsteps supports the theory proposed by Mr. Vidal, Pathfinder.” Mr. Vidal. Now that one was new. Reyes collapsed happily on the ground, a small amount of relief filling him at having concentrated proof in hand. The tech had delivered, despite his reservations on it and its handler. Devious smile growing, he brought the omni-tool to his lips. “Let’s pay our local Roekaar a visit.”
“You know where they are?”
The skepticism in the Pathfinder’s voice is not appreciated. “I wasn’t sitting on my ass the whole time. I’m looking at the place now.” There is a certain…authority in the Pathfinder’s next words that he wasn’t expecting. “Send me the coordinates. These murders stop today!” He blinks, before shaking his head. Touching, truly. But time to move this along. “Anything to assist, Pathfinder-“ Static. She hung up on him. Reyes’ lips part slightly. After a second of recovery, he types the navpoint in. Once he’s certain it’s been confirmed, he looks back down at the entry point to the Roekaar hideout. Times like these, it’s best to wait. But he’s a betting man. And the odds aren’t in their favor. -- Reyes waits until the forward party leaves to sneak in. The matter of breaking and entering, of planting demolitions, of playing dirty, are all well-worn and familiar. While the tech might have come through for him in finding evidence for murder, Reyes has less belief in the Pathfinder’s abilities to survive a firefight. …though he isn’t quite sure why that survival means anything to him. The Pathfinder’s presence on Kadara is clearly not to his benefit. He is just placing the finishing touches when he hears the door hiss open. Quickly, he rolls forward for cover, finding purchase behind a metal storage container. A few taps on his omni-tool, and his cloaking device fires. His finger rests on the trigger of his sniper rifle, ready to fire on the returning Roekaar. They file in, one by one. And Reyes has lined up a perfect shot, just before they are to cross the second set of doors, when- The Pathfinder comes strutting through after them like she owns the place. Reluctantly, Reyes releases his triggerfinger. “Damn it,” he mutters to himself. She’s quickly becoming more trouble than she’s worth. And certainly has no sense of subtlety. “Reyes should be here,” she states, walking right past his hiding spot. He shakes his head. At this point, he honestly does not know if he’s exasperated or amused. The angara and krogan follow directly behind her—the former sending a quick glance in his direction but making no further movement toward it. The AI speaks. “I detect no sign of Mr. Vidal, Pathfinder. Should we proceed without him?” Something unsettles him when the Pathfinder looks upset at the suggestion. “That’s not-!” And the Roekaar turn around. Blasters are aimed quickly at kill zones for the Pathfinder and her companions. He has to resist the urge to groan when her hands raise in the air in surrender. “Were we too loud?” She asks, and his brows draw together at the silly grin she has accompany her question. “Shut up,” one of the Roekaar grunts. “Farah will deal with you.” Reyes watches as the Pathfinder’s team is corralled in front of the Roekaar guards, their blasters pointed firmly at their backs. He counts to ten before he follow them deeper into the cavernous base, making sure to tread lightly. He needs the Roekaar taken out. There’s no turning back now. -- Reyes misses whatever conversation is taking place, but takes the shot when he sees the Roekaar leader raise a knife to the Pathfinder. Shoot first, clean up later has always been a favorite policy. He makes his way quickly down the stairs, gun at the ready and eyes trained ahead. His military training not entirely put to waste. “Not so fast.” Reyes crouches beside the Pathfinder, knowing she will undoubtedly need the cover. She crosses her arms. “You’re late.” He was four days early. But belaboring the point means missing an opportunity for showmanship. And he is such a fan of showmanship. “I’ve got a good reason. You’ll see in three…” he discretely taps the detonator. “Don’t just stand there!” Barks the leader, showing him her back. Tsk-tsk. “Two,” he continues, adrenaline beginning to spike. “Kill them-!” Bam! The explosives go off, knocking several of the Roekaar to the ground. Reyes can’t help but smirk, looking over his shoulder. “Still mad-?” But the Pathfinder is a blur of white-tinted armor, rolling forward and arming herself faster than he would have anticipated. “DOWN!” She screams. He reacts out of instinct- And the air around him floods in purple light, the hairs on the back of his neck and arms sticking straight up. Energy accumulates around the Pathfinder, lifting her feet slowlyfrom the ground. And then a wave emits, followed by an aftershock. Reyes watches with wide eyes as she tears through Roekaar with one, concentrated assault of biotic energy. Five go down immediately, another is catapulted into the rocked ceiling. He is momentarily thrown off-guard, until he hears returning blaster fire. Reyes moves with muscle memory, crouching behind a rock. Compartmentalizing the sheer force of the woman, he shifts, taking careful aim with his scope. The head of an advancing Roekaar comes into view. Steady, steady… “HRNGH!” A flash of white descends into his crosshairs. He stares as the Pathfinder falls from a booster-enhanced jump, omni-knife glowing orange and embedding itself straight into the Roekaar’s neck. Strands of her hair fall from her ponytail, her face completely focused and alert in a way that does something to the pit of his gut. “Holy shit,” Reyes whispers, breathless and with slightly weak knees.
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
When the smoke clears, there are eighteen dead Roekaar and Reyes has to try very hard not to feel rattled. Not because of the fight—no, such things are small change in the grand scope of things. He doesn’t even have a scratch on him, the only casualty a slight muss to his hair. It’s adrenaline, but from a different source that he’s more than familiar with. He just…never expected her to be the source of it. Reyes crosses his arms as he stands to the side, the railing supporting him as he watches the Pathfinder bend over her Angaran friend. The man is nursing a nasty burn gash on his left arm—maybe a clipped shotgun charge. She blows out thick chunks of her hair from her face, nose wrinkled as she smiles at the Angaran and he overhears bits and pieces of their exchange. She’s telling him about a run she did for Prothean artifacts, explaining about omnigel and its benefits as she patches him up. The Angaran looks at her, rapt, and Reyes doesn’t exactly commiserate. But maybe he now sees how the Pathfinder is not a complete waste of time to those she comes into contact with. After a moment, the Pathfinder stands, her armored fingers toying with the fasten of her failed ponytail. A wave of brown hair falls over her shoulders and his mouth feels the slightest bit dry as he watches her comb it back into place, retying it at the top of her head. Maybe she notices his stare, or feels it, because she turns to look at him. Snorts and rolls her shoulders. “Guess that could’ve gone better.” There’s a smudge of something across her cheek. And he needs to say something before he gives away that he’s discovered something new in the firefight. Reyes grins, pushes himself away from the railing and starts walking up the landing with her—her companions close behind. He feels…amicable. In a way he hasn’t before. The Roekaar had been a constant pain in his side, and while the Pathfinder’s approach was different from his own it wasn’t any less effective. Maybe a blunt hammer does open the same door as a lockpick. Reyes gives a short laugh of relief—today is, after all, a good day. “The streets of Kadara are safe again.” He pauses, tries it out mentally before speaking it. “You did good, Ryder.” Ryder. Yes. That already feels more appropriate—distant, but friendly. Something that will allow him to pave the way for a future contact, now that he’s decided he could find uses for her in the field. He smiles before he can stop it—not his sly usual one, but the real one. A little uncomfortable for the dimensions of his face. “Don’t worry, I’ll let all the important people know who to thank.” Thank you, he adds mentally. His good mood appears to be infectious—Ryder stops from her place in front of him and turns. A smile spreads across her lips as she gives a small shrug. “We make a good team.” Not having stopped in his own exit, Reyes leans in close as he goes to pass her. “Careful—I’ll start thinking you like me.” Ryder tilts her chin. He is not a tall man, but she still needs to look up to meet his gaze. The streak on her cheek runs parallel to a line of freckles. Yes, there’s definitely adrenaline now. Her brows go up, like she doesn’t understand why that’s something she needs to be careful of. “Would that be so bad?” He brushes his thumb over the smudge, almost lazily. “Depends.” Her eyes widen. He doesn’t try to hide the teasing interest in his tone. “Don’t be a stranger, Ryder.” Reyes leaves without turning around. Part of him doesn’t want to gauge how well the exit lands. A larger part of him knows that there’s work to be done, as there always is. -- He decides there’s a need to learn more about his new friend. Seriously, this time. Reyes has several hideouts, but this one in the Badlands is a favorite. There was just something about a thick miasma of sulfurous air that made him feel at home. He couldn’t immediately satisfy his curiosity—there were bargains to solidify, orders to pass down. But after he keys in a cargo manifesto for some stolen, Initiative goods, he curls up on his chair with a good round of intel. Hacking into the Initiative servers isn’t an issue anymore, and once he’s passed a few rudimentary firewalls it becomes clear that the human Pathfinder is literally an open book. Service record (recon specialist, one with a reputation for brawling), professional experience (Prothean artifact excavation), and personal (father, dead on Habitat 7; brother, hospitalized). All within a touch or two of the omni-tool. The rosters for the ship under her command amused him. Two near-locals to Kadara (Vetra, he knew to be a damn good smuggler), the Angaran (Jaal), a few Initiative humans…if there was a patterned behavior to those Ryder deemed associates, Reyes would be damned to find it. His gloved fingers tap against the readout. Really, this is enough to give him an idea. No immediate flags to indicate a lack of trustworthiness on Ryder’s part. No connections to Kadara beyond a few of her companions’ occasional business dealings. She could be a solution to what he needs in the move against Sloane. Reyes leans in his seat, craning his neck until it rests against the back of it. Closing his eyes, he let out a sigh from between his teeth. As a general rule, he never allows himself to get invested in possibilities.
But he does enjoy the idea of potential. And having Ryder as a business partner might allow for some new ones. -- The next day, he doesn’t quite know what to make of Umi’s skeptical look. “It’s true,” he defends lightly, shifting in his seat. The fan above them does little to stir fresh air into Kralla’s Song. “I was there, you know.” The asari shakes her head, dragging a rag over the counter. “What I don’t get is why you think I’d care.” “The Roekaar were leaving bodies in the marketplace.” “But not in my bar.” Reyes hums, conceding the point. “I made a deal to the good Pathfinder. Told her I’d let the important people know about the assist.” “And your idea of an important person is…” Reyes leans forward. Smiles patiently. “I happen to know who makes Kaetus’s favorite cocktails.” Umi rolls her eyes. “You’re out of your mind if you think I’m bringing anything to Sloane’s people from you.” He lifts his hands. “It will be to a mutual benefit, I’m sure.” His tone goes shrewd. “Or is the Kett problem just a rumor?” Umi’s attention is grabbed, no doubt despite herself. “What’s Ryder got on the Kett?” “A gun, I imagine.” “And what’s in it for you?” Umi asks with an edge. He makes a show of considering. “For now, just let it be known I have an eye for talent.” “Ugh.” "...and maybe a drink before I go?" "Ugh." -- She doesn’t quite fade from mind over the course of the next week. Reyes lays the groundwork, but the plans he has are going to need time to mature before they can take root. From his intel, it seems like Umi made good on telling Kaetus about Ryder’s unique ability to effectively stab first, question later. From his intel, he also knows that Kaetus had all but laughed in the bartender’s face. A setback, but not one that was unaccounted for. Reyes needs Ryder close to Sloane. To do that, Ryder’s going to have to make something of herself here. Just like he did. So he does what he can to send her in the right directions. He tells those who typically come to him for contract work to ask for the Pathfinder instead. He patches distress calls to her comm through off-server sources. Has his contacts report on her progress. So far, all of his careful effort has only amounted to solving a situation with a wind turbine and scanning a few bogwater-logged corpses. Helpful to the people who need it, but not enough to make a reputation. …he is beginning to realize how wrong he was, to assume he once knew what to make of her. With his orchestration decidedly not taking place face to face, he is therefore thrown when, approximately two weeks after the Roekaar base, Ryder is in Tartarus. He doesn’t notice her at first, or at all, as he enters the club that has become his base of operations away from home. The music isn’t particularly assaulting tonight, just a high-tempo riff that has all the dancers making what he is certain are good tips. The lights in the club are low, stained purple and red from the neon accents, and he feels himself deflate as he takes his customary walk up the stairs to his room. The door of it shuts behind him, and the dancing crowd is given no mind or attention. It’s not until later, about half a drink and trade deposition in, that a message pings at his wrist. Quickly, so as not to be distracted from his work, Reyes punches in the code to unlock it.
Reyes—
Do I get 400 credits for watching the girl again?
--Kian
Reyes rifles through his memories. He doesn’t remember a hostage or kidnapping- He does, however, eventually remember the credit amount. It’s what he tipped the bartender to direct Ryder to him. She was here? Why? Reyes closes his eyes, pinching the bridge of his nose. Before him lay several encrypted files and datadecks, all of which involve movement on Sloane. Shit. He makes fast work of hiding the files, before he stands and types a fast response.
Kian—
I prefer to handle tonight myself.
--Reyes.
-- It takes him a moment to find the Pathfinder in the crowd, initially because he is looking for Ryder in her customary white armor. He is not expecting to find her by the bar, swaying and emphatically listening to a drunk turian as an asari stabilizes her with an arm around the waist. From his place on the railing, his eyes follow Ryder’s movements like a hawk—tensing and anticipating her eventual shuffle to the stairs that lead to his room. But she doesn’t move toward it. Instead, she stays by the bar for a while longer, slamming down every drink that is offered to her. Reyes keeps mental tabs on who is giving her what, in the event of an incident. The krogan and angaran are not flanking her, instead she’s out with a turian he recognizes as Vetra, and an asari with a streak of dark paint across her eyes. The streak reminds him, almost fondly, of the one across Ryder’s cheek. But the thought passes as soon as he sees Ryder talking to Kian.
Time to put an end to this.
As much as Ryder is allowed to drink with her friends wherever she chooses, it wouldn’t hurt to remind her that this was his typical haunt. And to stop Kian from sharing any details Reyes didn’t want to share. But as Reyes approaches her through the crowd, it’s not conspiracy on Kian’s face, but interest. The bartender is listening with full attention at the woman in front of him, as her arms go wide and her voice lets out a soft laugh that somehow pierces the reverberating music of the club. Reyes frowns, eyes casing the room to look for Ryder’s companions—he makes note of Vetra talking with known contacts in the corner of the club, and the asari challenging a krogan to an arm-wrestling contest across the dance floor. Ryder is alone. Relatively. Since Kian, it seems, is more than happy to keep her company. Reyes doesn’t stalk, exactly, but he does make his approach quiet. Curious, as to what their conversation is before he invades. “-and then I waded through sulfuric acid to make sure it was the right body-“ She’s not wearing armor, he realizes. Her civilian clothes are the customary pants, jacket, and scarf, her gloved fingers dancing through the air as she continues her story. Kian laughs. “Ugh, don’t laugh! It burned right through and-“ “What brings you to Tartarus?” Reyes cuts in as he steps in behind her. The question is whispered in her ear and calm as ever. Ryder turns around, and she is… Drunk. Absolutely so. “Hey!” She greets, breaking out into a toothy smile. Her eyes shin with reflected club lighting, her cheeks are flush. “Hello yourself,” he counters, looking over her shoulder at Kian. The two men catch eyes, and the bartender nods before moving on to another set of customers. “Have you been in Kadara Port long?” Ryder shakes her head. “No, I was just telling-“ her nose wrinkles. “Shit, forgot his name. Hold on-“ she turns. “Shit, he’s not here.” “The bartender?” “Yeah.” “What were you telling him?” “Oh, about the bodies.” She shakes her head. “Not that important anymore. Unfortunately.” So there’d been no movement after the scanning job. Instead, Ryder had decided to come here and drink unattended beverages. Reyes leans toward her. She sways a little, but doesn’t move otherwise. “Heard there’s been quite a lot of trouble out there in the wastes. Taking care of yourself?” “Why, are you worried?” Her tone makes his head snap down, the two of them looking at one another eye to eye. That had sounded…suggestive. If he didn’t know better. Reyes thinks back to the fight. Ryder is still grinning. It dawns on him that she’s waiting for his reply. “It’s important in Kadara to watch out for new friends,” he offers. Ryder shifts forward. “So we’re friends?” The slightest of pauses. “Of course.” She laughs, an uninhibited (inebriated) sound that draws the attention of two or three onlookers. Before he can do anything, she’s grabbing his wrist. “Then let’s dance, friend.” This…is not how his evening is supposed to be going. But Reyes knows that keeping Ryder occupied on the dance floor of Tartarus is leagues better than her asking what he’s been up to, so he follows without resistance. She leads him to the dance floor, drops his wrist, and continues on a few steps before stopping herself. The space she’s left makes it clear that though they’re dancing together, they’re not dancing together. Something that makes little difference to Reyes as he effortlessly matches his movements to the music and keeps his eyes on her. She isn’t graceful. Ryder moves as though she is limitless energy, eyes closed and all limbs moving. It’s not meant to be seductive like the dances in the cages—rather, it’s something unrestrained. As if she’s claimed the floor for herself and is going to do what she wants with it. She matches rhythm, but he imagines it’s an accident of convenience. Her hair falls into her face, Ryder smiles to herself. He realizes, gradually as another song starts playing, that he is having a difficult time looking away. …and that he’s not the only one. Not wanting Ryder’s attention fully diverted for the evening, Reyes steps closer. He doesn’t touch, but the new proximity is enough to deter some of the half-started advances toward her. It’s about the work, he rationalizes. Tartarus doesn’t attract the safest of one-night stands. One of his once stabbed him through the ear. Ryder opens her eyes, stares at him with her smile still in place. …It’s about the work. Eventually, Ryder tires. When she does, she makes a rather undignified collapse on a nearby seating area. He follows, carefully. Now would be the logical time to make his exit, to act as though he’s been called away by something or someone else. Instead, he’s still curious. “Why are you here?” Ryder sags against the sofa. “Had to blow off some steam.” That was one way to do it. “What for?” She shakes her head. “Bad run in the marketplace. An angaran was looking for her sister. I volunteered to help.” Reyes finds a seat next to her. “You weren’t successful?” “No, I was.” “Where was she?” Ryder looks down. “Under a grate.” Reyes watches her carefully, noticing new signs that were apparent before this revelation. Her eyes have dark shadows under them, her lower lip has a red tint to it from biting down. This, he understands. It's the Kadara he wants to get rid of. “Call for another drink then,” he offers. She stares at him with slightly bleary eyes. “Are you going to leave me with the tab again?” He makes a show of wincing. “I’ll be on my best behavior, this round.” Ryder, he is deciding, makes him uncomfortable. Her gaze is open and vulnerable, far too trusting for someone who doesn’t know the pieces he is moving on the board. Her cheeks are still flush from whatever she’s been drinking and dancing. It’s clear to him, in that moment, that she is attractive in an objective sort of way. She is bright eyes and easy smiles, frustratingly gullible and endlessly tenacious. His eyes dart to her lips—a terrible, terrible idea. “Reyes?” He looks up. “Yes?” Ryder yawns. “I think I’ll have to pass on the drink. Duty calls in the morning.” There’s a sense of…of not being done that he doesn’t like. But to voice it is ridiculous, and so he only gives his best understanding nod. “Take care, Ryder.” She stands, giving him a mock salute that is just a little unbalanced. “Back at you, Reyes.” He watches her until the door closes, wishing he didn't feel the need to.
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
It’s not stalking if it’s reconnaissance. Or so Reyes tells himself, as he watches Ryder from a safe distance across the port’s marketplace. For once, she isn’t flanked by her usual companions--the enamoured angaran, the grizzly krogan, the trouble-making asari. It’s just her, in full armor. Bartering for...popcorn, if his tap is as clear as he thinks it is. For a moment he just watches, a hand loosely on his sidearm as his omnitool picks up recorded static from the conversation she’s having with a merchant. “Wait, it’s how much?” Comes her incredulous voice on the feed. The human says something in return. “But, uh...I’m the Pathfinder?” Reyes smiles to himself as he listens. She’s probably just guaranteed a 20% rise in price. “Okay, okay. Fine, you win. I’ll pay.” From where he watches, he sees Ryder blow a chunk of hair up and away from her face. Her face is screwed into an expression of disbelief and he most definitely does not want to have to kill her. But he might. And that is...an unfortunate truth. It’s been about a week since he last ran into her at Tartarus, a carefully planned avoidance that was, regrettably, more for clearing his head than a need for tactical retreat. Ever since the incident with the Roekaar, something’s changed. And he can’t quite put a label to it other than fondness. Which was why, last night, he had poured himself an uncustomary fourth drink when he read the latest reports from his operatives. Sara Ryder, and two of her friends, had entered the Collective Base. His base---well, one of them anyway. As the territory had been regulated to one of his higher ranking subordinates, his knowledge of what Ryder was doing there, and what she found out, were still unclear. Keema had promised to follow up with Crux through the network, but he had to know for himself if the Charlatan’s operations were compromised. And, from there, decide what to do. To what end, he was unsure. Or, perhaps more honestly, hesitant to be sure. But he had brought a sidearm. If needed, he was prepared to use it, no matter how much he personally resisted the outcome. Reyes looks up as he hears her give a parting goodbye to the merchant, her arms full of old cardboard boxes he never thought to see again. Reyes presses his lips together, watching her smile and even wave at some of the acquaintances she had made at the Port. No doubt all of them would shoot her without hesitation if the circumstances required it. So why did he feel...responsible for her? Before he could rationalize an answer, she approached, still not noticing his presence against another stall. So he cleared his throat. “Ryder.” She pauses in her steps, looks up. Meets his gaze and he feels incredibly uncertain about what he’s come to this market to do. And then she groans, one of her armored hands covering her face. “Great. It’s you .” This makes him pause. Reyes tilts his head and forces levity into his tone. “Now, now. Here I thought we were friends.” She peeks at him behind the gaps of armored fingers. “How much of an ass was I the other night?” He blinks as he tries to puzzle her meaning. “At...Tartarus?” “Yeah, guess I had too much to drink.” She winces. “Some guy named Kian won’t stop sending me omni-messages.” Reyes files this note for later. She somehow winces further. “And I might have made out with a krogan. Allegedly.” She sends him a Look, as if they’re conspirators. “Allegedly according to PeeBee, that is.” And then her face softens, nervous. “So nothing weird? At you, I mean?” He gives a soft laugh, and actually means it. “You were nothing but a professional colleague.” She finally drops the glove covering her hand. “Phew. I would’ve thought for sure-” Her ears color, slightly red. “-Well. Phew, anyways.” He raises a brow, falls into step with her. “You had concerns?” “Not about you.” She clears her throat. “Uh, more like. Me at you.” Her ears are positively red now and Reyes is… Intrigued. Despite himself, and the fact that he might be here to kill her. “Ryder, if I didn’t know any better this might sound like you’re interested.” Ryder laughs. “No! No, nothing like that. Just, uh. Glad I didn’t overstep any boundaries or anything.” In a move that is completely cringe-inducing yet somehow endearing, she waggles her eyebrows. “Apparently my drunk tastes run more...Drack-y.” She looks vaguely green. “God that krogan better not have been Drack. I’ll kill PeeBee.” He smiles and it doesn’t quite fit his face. “Judging from what I saw of you that night,” he lowers his head until they are eye-to-eye, “I would guess your friend is playing you.” She blinks, jerking back a little. “Which friend?” “PeeBee, of course.” “What a relief.” She grins, nudges him with her arm. “Anyway you want some popcorn? I paid about four guns for it, so I’m sure it’s mediocre.” He takes a box, only because she offered. “Big plans this evening?” She rolls her eyes. “Maybe, if they stop having me run errands for five minutes.” “They?” “My crew.” Her grin widens, all teeth. “You haven’t met all of them yet, have you?” “I haven’t had the pleasure.” Nor the desire. “Maybe we’ll get around to that one day, then. Once you’re done being a shady, smuggling bastard and all.” Reyes flips the box over in his hands. “Such an occasion would warrant celebration, I’m sure.” Ryder gives him a look he can’t decipher. “Hey, I don’t mean anything by that.” Again that grin is on her face. “Some of my favorite people are shady, smuggling bastards.” The line of conversation is taking a turn he hasn’t anticipated--one that’s not desired. So he redirects. “And krogan, apparently.” “Ouch. I deserved that.” As they walk, he sees the dock come closer into view. Time to ask the questions he needs to ask, before she’s back on her ship with her aforementioned crew and he misses the window to… To do what, exactly? It occurs to him that maybe he doesn’t know. Even still. Reyes sinks his fingers into one of his pockets, keeps his voice aloof. “How long have you been on Kadara this time?” Ryder shrugs. “Haven’t left. We were planning on making a run to the Nexus, but got caught up with some business in the sulfur springs.” His eyes slowly slide to her profile. “Oh?” “Accidentally fell into a cave, cave turned out to be a stronghold for the Collective…” she waves her free hand. “Long story.” Reyes’ heart seems to slow in his chest. “You...fell.” “I’m, uh, still working out the jump jets.” He watches her carefully, looking for a tell, a slip. Anything that implies she’s lying. Instead all he sees is her looking right back at him, head tilted. “You okay?” He forces himself to blink, to break whatever it is that’s washed over him. “I should be asking you that. The Collective can be ruthless.” But hopefully silent . “It wasn’t a big deal. One of them was giving out false orders under the Charlatan’s name-” He freezes, but recovers quickly. “-so one of the...lieutenants? Head mooks? Whatever, asked us to look into it with SAM.” “Which lieutenant?” He asks, cursing himself under his breath at the question. It’s given too much away- -but Ryder continues, oblivious. “Crux? We ended up finding the traitor, running around in a cave, and then I got ambushed by some Adhi dogs.” She wrinkled her nose. “You know, standard.” His mind is already racing through a thousand possibilities. “You found the traitor, then?” “Yeah,” her voice softens. “Had to take her out, unfortunately.” Reyes stares at her. “And that...was all?” She sends him a quizzical look. “What, not impressed?” What he is… Is relieved. Elated. And there is something wrong with that, that his relief over not having to eliminate the Pathfinder takes precedence to someone attempting to use his moniker. But there it is, real and beating in his chest and forming in the curves of his lips. “It is...not the average person who would help someone like the Charlatan,” he hedges. Ryder starts toward the docking bay keycode. “I didn’t do it to help the Charlatan,” she explains, jutting her head over her shoulder, where the market lays behind them. “I did it to help out Kadara.” The door to the docking bay slides open, behind it he sees Ryder’s ship. He- -he doesn’t want her to go just yet. There’s still intel she could help him with. Details about the traitor or the base- “Gotta run, or Liam will kill me. Good seeing you Reyes.” Wait! He thinks. “Always a good talk,” is what he says. Ryder gives him a small wave goodbye over her shoulder, before the doors to the docking bay slide shut. Reyes stands there, staring for a little too long. After a moment, he exhales, and lets go of the hold on his sidearm. -- He verifies her story through Keema. It checks out. Ryder has, somehow, done him and the Collective a favor. He doesn’t know what to make of it. Of owing someone he needs. For work. -- The Tempest leaves out of Kadara Port the next morning, or so the eyes he has on it report. Reyes sits back against one of the sofas of one of his safe houses, eyes dark as he tries to think through implications. Someone had been using his name without his permission, but worse, without his knowledge. It bothered him that he did not know Ryder’s next move, that she had seen the inside of one of his strongholds--again, without his knowledge. He is just about to pour himself a glass of something strong when a chime goes off at his wrist. Frowning, he taps on his omni-tool, unsurprised to see that it’s bad news. Cargo is missing. Expensive cargo. Reyes takes a deep breath, ignores the glass, and leans the back of his head against the back of his sofa. An old proverb comes to his mind, one his abuela had been fond of, back on the Citadel. “The devil you know is better than twenty you don’t,” he mutters, rubbing the bridge of his nose. Before he can stop himself, his fingers are typing again. A quick message, sent out before he can think through it quickly, to a private channel he, by all means, shouldn’t have access to:
Ryder,
Stop by my room the next time you’re in Kadara. Could use a hand with something.
About ten seconds pass, before his omni-tool chimes again.
Sure! We have to head back to Kadara anyway (grabbed the wrong popcorn D*X )
He swallows, finding it hard to write a response back. In the end, he doesn’t compose one at all. ...maybe it’s for the best, he decides to himself, if it's Ryder who is the devil he knows.
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10594977
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Wanted The Ten Dollar
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{
"Archive Warning": "Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings",
"Category": null,
"Characters": "Alexander Hamilton, Elizabeth \"Eliza\" Schuyler, Thomas Jefferson, John Laurens, James Madison, Angelica Schuyler, Margaret \"Peggy\" Schuyler, Hercules Mulligan, Gilbert du Motier Marquis de Lafayette, George Washington, George III of the United Kingdom, Martha Washington, Samuel Seabury, Charles Lee, Aaron Burr, Theodosia Prevost Burr, Dolley Madison, Other Character Tags to Be Added, most relationships are high key one sided??",
"Fandom": "Hamilton - Miranda",
"Language": "English",
"Rating": "Not Rated",
"author": "by orphan_account",
"chapters": "13/?",
"completed": "",
"published": "2017-04-11T00:00:00",
"words": "51,446",
"Additional Tags": "what is this, Alternate Universe - Reincarnation, Alternate Universe - College/University, Wacky adventures to get Ham to remember!, I should be sleeping, odd attempts at humor??, other historical people have cameos!!, tell me what you want to see!, everyone is low key pining for alex, Angst, war mentions later!, IT'S A RIDE KIDS",
"Relationship": null,
"Character": null,
"Relationships": "Other Relationship Tags to Be Added, Alexander Hamilton/Thomas Jefferson, George Washington/Martha Washington, Aaron Burr/Alexander Hamilton, Alexander Hamilton/Samuel Seabury",
"Series": null,
"Collections": null,
"Fandoms": null,
"Archive Warnings": null,
"Categories": "F/F, F/M, M/M",
"Bookmarks": null,
"Chapters": null,
"Comments": null,
"Completed": null,
"Hits": null,
"Kudos": null,
"Published": null,
"Words": null,
"Updated": null
}
|
"Two lifetimes and he still hasn't shown up," John Laurens sighed, resting his head on the desk as the others in the room gathered around him. "We've all been here two times or more and Alexander hasn't shown up once! Dear god, where is he?"The others assembled all looked at him in various expressions, some confusion, most sadness. Laurens sat up, staring at the group assembled. They were all here, again. All of them were here and had been "authenticated" by the government, but they were still missing one person. Washington sighed and ran a hand over his face as he sat down across from Laurens, "It's been two hundred years. He has to be here, somewhere."The Schuyler sisters and one Ms. Maria Reynolds all shared glances, a mental conversation taking place between all of the four women. It was a few moments before Peggy leaned forward, hands planted on the table. They turned to everyone else in the room, "Come on, we all met here, Columbia University of all places! If we showed up here, then Al has to be here. He's just not...where he should be.""It was his Alma Mater." Burr supplied from the back against the glares that practically accused him of this mess being entirely his fault, "So, maybe we have to look for him! Maybe it's like a kind of..." he waved his hand as he searched for the word and then perked up when he found it, "oh! A scavenger hunt!"Madison snorted in laughter while Jefferson shook his head, the mess of curls called his head following the motions, "Except the prize is one more annoying Federalist?" Looks were shared when they remembered Adams' large blow up when they all showed up, "Maybe it's a sign that Hamilton shouldn't even be here.""You didn't show up the first time, either," Hercules said simply, looking up from his sewing, "but, Burr's right. We have to look for him! If he's like us, then he doesn't have his name certified so he isn't Alexander Hamilton yet, he's still whoever. We just need to wake him up!"Lafayette leaned forward, they were fixing their ponytail and finally sighing, "But, mon amis where can we find him? Mon Petit Lion never really showed any interest in anything besides, economics and government.""And revolution!" Peggy called out."And revolution." Lafayette amended, high-fiving their nonbinary pal.Washington sat back, brow furrowed as he took the sentence into account. Finally, he snapped his fingers and grinned, teeth white and sharp. "That's it! I'm giving all of you a mission, pick up an extracurricular. Stick with it throughout the semester and if you find anyone who is like Hamilton, report back to us, "This is obviously a group effort."Angelica, after a few moments, tossed her phone on the table. "There's a list of every extracurricular on campus. I have student council covered.""I have the choir." Eliza offered, "And Maria and I are both in the marching band."Too many members of the group took up Debate Club for anyone to worry about it. And that's how it went until every club and activity was taken. Now, all that was left, was for Alexander Hamilton to be found. Choir, to say the least, was very eventful. There must've been at least two hundred people, all shouting, all singing various scores. It was too much. Eliza stared at the mass of people in front of her with wide eyes. It was like a tide of people had descended upon her and she could barely move without hitting someone else. Two people moved forward, she stepped back, and another shouldered her from the side. And she fell from the second riser with a surprised shout. She expected to smash into the ground, but oddly enough, someone caught her. "Oh dear," the man laughed, dark hair long and hanging in front of his face. Eliza blinked and flushed scarlet when those eyes met hers, "are you alright? That would've been a nasty fall."He set her on her feet and laughed. Eliza straightened her blue shirt and pushed her dark hair from her face, "Thanks. Elizabeth Schuyler.""Lin La Vega," He introduced with a wave, someone shouted Lin! behind them and he chuckled, "Nice, to meet you Elizabeth, but I must be going. Lee is quite pissy if I ignore him." He turned and walked into the mass of people without another word, disappearing as if he was never there.She blinked and stood to attention as the instructor walked in and swore at the amount of people in the room. "Choir's a bust, then?" Washington asked with dry erase marker in hand as he went to cross off "choir" from the list of extracurriculars on his office wall, perks of being a teacher. Eliza nodded, a frown set deep on her face, "No one there even matched him, I met a few people but they were all too...not Alexander-y.""Choir's out, then." He crossed off the word and stared at the others all gathered around. There were various looks of the degrees of despair. If Maria had to pick a thing she never imagined herself doing in all of her lives, it was Marching Band. She had played saxophone her entire life and despite hating the concept of marching all around, she was quite good at it. She frowned, looking for Eliza's dark head of hair over in the flute section but it was too late. She couldn't see her through the mass of people. She let out a sigh when she remembered that Eliza wasn't going to be here today, ladies were getting their vocal range placements. But, she didn't have too much time to dwell on that fact because all she saw was the cherry picker that the director stood on to watch formation, rise. "Hello, guys, gals, and nonbinary pals!" The man shouted, german accent loud and almost overbearing, "I'm your Director, Friedrick Von Steuben. And this assistant director, Lin La Vega. He'll be in charge of you when I'm not. Anyway, let's see how your high schools screwed you over, at attention!" Marching Band? Really?" Washington groaned, exasperated, "I thought he was definitely going to be one of the drum majors. Laurens, you do remember that time he got so angry at one of the drum boys that he took in and drummed out one of the marching beats?"Laurens chuckled, "I always forget he did that, but you know Alexander, his way or the highway."Washington laughed, crossing off "Marching Band" from the board. Lafayette and Peggy sat tall together at the LGBT Club meeting, backs straight and ready to face criticism. But, it never came. The two looked around when they saw the people mingling in, there were a lot. But, the lead teacher of it, one Mr. Pierre-Etienne du Ponceau, sat down. He yawned, finished sending a text to someone before finally putting his attention to the rest of the club."Okay, we'll start by going around and saying our names, pronouns, and sexuality." He said simply, french accent light, "It's okay if you want to skip, no one is pressuring you here. I'll start and then we can go around, I'm Mr. Ponceau, Pon for short. I have he/him pronouns, and I'm am gay."Peggy blinked when they realized they were next. "Peggy Schuyler, they/them, and pan."And so it went. Until a student who had introduced himself as Sam Shepherd raised his hand. "Oh yeah, my roommate Lin is supposed to be here on Thursday. He couldn't make it today."Mr. Pon nodded and then the meeting continued. "Are you kidding me?!" Lauren howled, throwing his head back as Washington crossed off the club title, "Everyone has read those damn letters! We were gay as fu-""Language," Washington warned. "There are young ears here."Lafayette and Peggy both shouted, at the same time mind you, "We're all legal adults!" Burr shook his head, standing with Laurens as the latter sat on a desk at the Newspaper Club. Burr sighed, shook his head and stared as the two were handed their column for the month. Burr raised an eyebrow, "Student affairs? Really?""Get ready for drama galore." Laurens laughed in return, "But, hey, at this rate we'll find Alexander before anyone else does!"The Anonymous Column head was spinning in a chair-Fin? Spin? Sin? Neither of the two caught his name, as he discussed various topics to start the new school year with the Head, Benjamin Franklin. The two seemed to be quite interested in the topic of the amount of known reincarnations on campus, especially since the elder man was a known and very famous one. The other, on the other hand, was not. "What should we start on with student affairs?" Burr asked, deciding to actually get some work done. Maybe they could root out Alexander from this lot before it was too difficult or too late to tell."Orange for the president?""Orange for the president." "Didn't he start a newspaper company?" Lafayette asked, not looking at anyone as they painted their nails a vibrant pink color. "One would think Mon Petit Lion would love to continue that on. As seeing he decided to write about his affair.""And trash Adams." Jefferson supplied, remembering that he and James were to pick off their stop the following day. Madison groaned, "And don't forget fifty-one essays.""Is someone still bitter?" Eliza laughed."We agreed on twenty-five!"Jefferson clapped him on the shoulder and sighed, "Shut up Mr. Twenty Nine." "Honestly," Angelica sighed, sewing together a hole in Peggy's yellow suit vest, "Sewing Club is the most relaxing thing I've ever been a part of. Thanks, Hercules."Said man chuckled, taking another needle from his beanie. "No problem, Angel. So, you said Alex wasn't in Student Council? I imagined that would be the place for him to be. You know?""I'm starting to get worried.""What do you mean?"Angelica sighed, blowing a loose strand of curly hair out of her face, "Like what if he just isn't here? What if Burr killed more than just Alexander? What if he can't come back at all?"Hercules frowned, stitching together a piece of cloth that appeared to be in semblance to a quilt. "We can't think about it like that. Burr feels guilty enough but, Alexander always shows up. He's literally what brought us all together in this lifetime. So, if he's not here," Hercules leaned forward, smiling, "I'm going to kick his ass personally when I find him.""Ninety percent sure you'd destroy him.""Things happen."A shout rang up and the two turned to look at a laughing group of people. A blonde haired George King shouting about someone sewing a bright green strip of cloth to his red shirt. His roommates, Lin and Sam Shepherd, were too busy laughing as their prank. Hercules rolled his eyes, "Those three are going to be the death of us.""Four." Angelica corrected, "Don't forget about Chase Lee.""Oh yeah," Hercules sighed, "can't forget about him." "Sewing was a bit far fetched," Madison sighed, "but dear god, give us a lucky break!" Washington nodded, the circles under his eyes were dark. He was thankful for his teaching assistant, one Benjamin Tallmadge, being able to sneak into student conversations without any suspicion. But, out of all of his classes, no one had turned up as a probably Alexander Hamilton Reincarnate status. It was starting to get worrying. He had found plenty of other figures, but not Hamilton.Jefferson sighed, staring at the list of the extracurriculars all crossed out. Only a few remained and Jefferson sighed, theater club was tomorrow. "If Hamilton doesn't show up soon I'm going to personally trash everything he ever created so he has to come back out of spite."Eliza laughed, "Will you? That'd be very helpful." Theater club, to say the least, was the most terrifying place Jefferson had ever been to. There was no doubt. The stage was looming, the stage lights were burning and King's group of people were all singing an oddly beautiful rendition of a Heathers' song. Madison glanced at him and together, they both moved towards the stage where the rest of the people were sitting. Nathan Hale, the teacher in charge, was sitting in the front, watching with a look of wide-eyed wonder. "Isn't the theater a beautiful place?" Hale chuckled as he saw Madison and Jefferson sit down, "I mean, look at these young men. They're performing without being asked."Madison rolled his eyes and leaned over to Jefferson, his voice low, "I feel like I've seen that one kid before.""Which one?""The one singing as Veronica."Jefferson looked up, seeing the man with his dark hair tied into a dark ponytail. He blinked, staring up at the man on stage as the man snarled out a well-memorized line, eyed wide and arms waving. Jefferson blinked and felt an odd feeling stir in his chest. He knew that feeling well. "Do you think?" Jefferson asked his friend, Madison's eyes were wide, all for the stranger on stage, "I think that's Hamilton."Madison stretched up, glancing at Hale's attendance sheet and the various photos next to the name. "La Vega?""They were all villains!" La Vega screamed from the stage, voice reverberating around them as he shouted at the other three on stage, "Heather, and Kurt, and Ram! And I killed them!"Madison blinked. "That's him." "Lin?" Eliza blinked, "Lin La Vega?""I'm sure of it," Jefferson said, watching his phone be passed from person to person as they all stared at the video of Lin reenacting a scene from Heathers. "You know that feeling when reincarnates recognize one another? Well, I felt that."Washington had his laptop open, checking student records as he glanced up, the profile still loading, "How do the rest of you know La Vega?"Eliza blinked. "He's the lead tenor in Choir.""Student director in Marching Band." Maria supplied. "He's Bisexual." Peggy and Lafayette supplied at the same time.Burr frowned, "He writes the student anonymous column for the newspaper."Angelica and Hercules shared a glance, but Hercules answered, "He was with Shepherd and King in Sewing Club."Washington let out a sigh, "How didn't we realize? He's in Debate Club.""He's quiet in Debate Club," Jefferson replied instantly, almost disgusted, "that ruled him out almost instantly. Washington, is his profile pulled up yet? I know he's one of the few freshmen who have their majors announced.""If you tell anyone I showed you this I will have to kill you," Washington warned as he turned his laptop around, "no, this is breaking so many rules at the moment. None of you understand really."Lin La Vega stared at them throught the screen, a bright smile on his face. His student information was on the screen. Name: Lin Alexander La Vega. DOB: Janurary 11th 1999. Country of Origin: Nevis. "Majors:" Angelica read from the file, "Theatre, Writing. Minors: Economics. You have got to be kidding me. He literally slid right from under us with the minor.""We got him!" Lafayette stood, wide eyed and laughing as he wrapped an arm around both Laurens and Hercules. "We got him! The Revolutionary set is getting back together!"Maria frowned and held up a hand, "You do realize that there is one big problem? He doesn't remember who he was, or even us."Washington chuckled, dark eyes landing on Jefferson, Madison and Burr. The three squirmed under that look as Washington simply said, "Well, I have a plan. And I think this is going to work." "I swear to god." George King yawned, rolling completely off the bed until he landed in a pile of blankets on floor. His british accent thick with sleep, "It's three in the morning. I'm going to flay a man if the building isn't on fire."Sam sat up, chuckling as he remembered being thankful for George being forced to take the bottom bunk. The two others in the room were barely moving. Sam stood from his bottom bunk, hitting the matress above him so Chase would wake up. "Come on, someone's probably messing with us.""I'm going to kill their friends and family." George sang into floor, the sound muffled under the blanket pile that hit him from view. Lin sat up from the bunk above him, "I want to sleep. I'm a college student!""Sammy," Lin offered, dark hair messy from sleep and voice husky, "could you see who is at the door?""Yeah, it's probably the dumb jocks in 174 again." Sam sighed, stepping over George "The Lump" King, "If Max Robes and Nate Bostane want to start this up, oh, we'll start it up."Sam threw open the door just as Chase sat up. He blinked at the three hulking figures in the doorward. Sam swallowed, he recongized them. They were news everywhere on campus, the founding fathers reincarnated. Thomas Jefferson raised an eyebrow at him and had to bend at the waist to look him in the eye. Sam swallowed and took a step back. "What do you want?""We're looking for Lin La Vega." Jefferson simply, teeth bared in an odd smile as he poked Sam in the chest, "We know this is his dorm."George yelled something about their "No Assholes Allowed" policy but Lin took this chance to jump from his bunk. His bare feet hit the carpet and he walked forward, straightening the shirt twisted around him. Lina yawned, "If you wanted to talk, dear god, wait for the morning. Some of us actually have class tomorrow you asshats.""Sorry," Burr offered, voice oddly stiff when he realized that this was the first time he was facing Hamilton since their fateful duel, "but this is important."Lin blinked, he frowned when he remembered Burr's face. It took a few minutes for him to come up with a reaction. "Unless, I'm Alexander Hamilton and you're here to shoot me, piss off."And he slammed the door in their faces. "Lin," George yawned once the door was closed, "can you help me back into bed?"Lin rolled his eyes, "Yeah, whatever your majesty."
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They watch him, whether he's going to class, or in extracurriculars, hell, or even studying in the library. There is a pair of eyes on him from the women in his past life. It's quiet and he doesn't know, but every other reincarnate from their friend group does.Angelica wants him safe. He helped create America and if someone got to him, there could be an undoing of America itself. Of that, she was sure.Eliza wants to know he's always going to be there. He slipped through her fingers in one life and she couldn't catch the ashes of his wildfire until now. And she was going to keep ever piece together because when he remembered someone would need to.Peggy wants their friend back. They had passed on early, way too early, in their previous life and had missed too much.Maria wants to see him again. She wants to apologize, she wants to make amends. But, most of all, she wants to keep him away from James. She hasn't found him yet, but there's no doubt that he'll show up too. And she's always had a nagging feeling that he'll settle a score.And so they watch him.The college has only been in session for a week and already, their job is tougher than it needs to be."He's friends with King George," Peggy laughed, drinking their smoothie from the school campus cafe, "You have to be kidding me! That's hilarious.""The King doesn't remember," Angelica observed, watching the two people at the end of the patio through her sunglasses. Lin was laughing at a video on his laptop, George beside him and sharing a single pair of earbuds. A smile cracked across her face as she sipped her tea, "so, we don't have to worry about him being strangled." She set down her cup and finally let out a sigh, "Okay, this is getting creepy as hell.""You're telling me." Maria chuckled, adjusting her legs over Eliza's lap, "I still can't believe the guys showed up at his dorm at three in the morning."Eliza chuckled, holding up her phone, "But it's still trending! #WhenPresidentsShowUpAtYourDorm. You should hear some of these. 'Hello, do you have a moment to talk about our constitution?' or 'Would you like to buy freedom cookies?', no, wait, 'Washington said we couldn't side with France, can we stay here?'.""Damn them," Peggy grumbled, "they're memes before I was!""Burr wasn't a president." Maria offered and they all laughed. "You," Washington started, arms crossed as he stared down at the sheepish students on his couch, "have invented a new kind of stupid. You went to his dorm in the middle of the night. What possessed you to do that?!""Mr. President..." Madison tried to amend, taken aback by the cold anger in the man's voice, "it," he glanced at the two on his left side before finally sighing, "okay, fine. It was a stupid idea.""What were you even hoping to do?""That," Jefferson perked up, eyes wide, "I don't know.""God, you're hopeless." Washington sighed, pinching the bridge of his nose, "just, try to make amends today at Debate Club. He hated you in his last life, we don't need him to hate you in this one." Speak of the asshats!" Lin's cry was well heard across the debate club room and the Revolutionary Set all stared. Looks were shared and finally, Lafayette let out a sigh as Sam, Chase, and George laughed at their friend's reaction to the Democratic-Republicans walked in."It's weird seeing him with them," Hercules whispered to Laurens and Lafayette. The two nodded and he continued, "I remember him tearing into Seabury. I never thought he'd be friends with them."Laurens pursed his lips in disgust, "I dueled and shot Lee for Alexander. It's wrong.""He's with the King, he's friends with the King," Lafayette pointed out, "Back then they would have hanged Alex for being a Patriot."Hercules blinked, "You have to wonder, though, why doesn't any of them remember? They're all together, with one of the lead Patriots nonetheless.""It is odd, mon ami.""Ladies and Gentlemen," Washington's voice broke through the haze of the discussions as he spoke, "line up in alphabetical order, last names."And they did as they were ordered.And once it was done, Washington walked down the line. He ordered them into partners and counting them. He never faltered, even saying "La Vega, Lafayette, group nine." without hesitation.Once everyone was grouped and numbered, he said, "I've picked your partner for the first debate of the year. I'm assigning your positions on this matter. It's easily researchable and everyone has their opinions.""Sir," Angelica called from where she stood with her partner, Sam Shepherd, "what's the topic?" Her questions were for Washington, her eyes were for Lafayette's partner."The Financial System of America," Washington said, "it's creation and it's history. From the 1700's to today. So, I'm assigning your stance."He walked the opposite way down the line from when he started, simply saying For or Against for every group he came across. Schuyler and Shepherd. For. Laurens and Lee. Against. La Vega and Lafayette. For. Jefferson and Jackson. Against. And so on it went until everyone was assigned.Washington stared at his club members and simply said, "This will be your main debate for the month and it will be set up in a round-robin style. The top debaters will be the first round debates at our first competition. So, organize a meeting place and then get out of my classroom." "I heard you're working with Lafayette on your debate strategy," Eliza said to Lin when she saw him in choir, "that's all my sister was talking about.""Yeah," Lin laughed, "they're pretty cool. We're meeting on Friday for coffee to discuss some stuff for the debate."There was a quiet moment before Eliza sat down on the bench next to him. Lin blinked and turned to face her. "I take it Angelica saw the lineup for the debate? Lafayette and I are up against her and Sam for the first round.""Yeah, I can't tell if she's pissed, scared, or up for the challenge." Eliza baited, watching to see the reaction. She never swore back then and she had to smile when she noticed a pink dusting on his cheeks. "Maybe it's all three.""I hope it's all three." Lin laughed, "Lafayette wants someone good to debate against."Eliza paused, blinked, and finally laughed. Her Alexander never turned down a chance to debate, so this only widened the gap between Alexander Hamilton and Lin La Vega. "Saxophones," Lin yelled from the director's platform, the smaller one used for shows since Steuben was taking his break from conducting to get water, "let's run your formation one more time. Measures one through twenty-five." He held up his hands and finished with "your circle was weak. Clarinets were owning all of your asses!"Maria rolled her eyes and looked down at the music stand connected to her saxophone. She inhaled and began to play. One, two, three, four. And she marched with her section, not missing steps. She parted with her half, swung around and connected with the end of the other line. Then they moved in the circle.Measure twenty-five played and they were finished.Lin pursed his lips, frowned and from above, Maria could hear the annoyed, "Again. I wanted the circle tighter, it's getting weaker."Maria was really missing Alexander at this moment, he wasn't a drill sergeant like Lin was. "So, mon ami," Lafayette purred, sitting at the booth in the far corner of the campus cafe. Lin sat across from them, laptop open in front of him with the white light sharpening the shadows on his face, "where should we start?""I was thinking we could look at the beginning of the American Financial System," Lin offered, he looked up, the words of the laptop were reflected upside down in his oval reading glasses, "and the man who created it. We could look at why he thought it was good to create the banks when he did."Lafayette wanted to scream and tear their hair out, but they settled for nodding and smiling. "Yeah, that sounds, how you say, awesome! So," they leaned forward, trying to find a hint of anything in those big dark eyes, "do you know who started it?""Alexander Hamilton," Lin mused, adding a few musical notes to the name, "I had to do a report on him in high school. The guy was kind of an asshole and all that, but hey, he started where I did." Lafayette blinked at the phrasing."What do you mean?"Lin chuckled, "We both were born in Nevis. Kind of how like you and well, you were born in France. And how you were granted an automatic dual citizenship to America because the other Lafayette was granted an honorary one."Lafayette chuckled, "Yeah, you're right on that one.""It's ironic Washington paired two immigrants up with one another," Lin commented to no one, drinking his coffee and setting it down before he continued, "and have us argue For. So, do you think it's all a ploy?""A ploy for what?" Lafayette blinked. Did he know? Did he realize? Lafayette swallowed, did he remember? "Washington doesn't seem to be that type of guy. I remember him having spies during the revolution but I highly doubt he'd mess with a bunch of undergrads."Lin looked up at the word "spies" and something flashed in his eyes. Lafayette watched Lin bite his lip, all he needed was a push. "Wait. I remember! Hamilton controlled Washington's correspondence to his spies during the revolution!"Lin looked up and sighed, "What's it like having two lives running through your head? Or much more?""It's all," Lafayette waved his hand, wrinkling his nose and his accent got thicker, "muddled. I remember it happening but there's just so much of it. Kind of like remembering what happened when you had your school photo taken. You know it happened, you just don't remember the events all in, um, high definition."The two looked at each other for a moment and Lin turned his computer around. On the screen was a painted portrait of one, Alexander Hamilton. Lin blinked, "You know if you're all here. Where is he?"Internally screaming was the only thing Lafayette could only remember doing the entirety of the meeting. Hercules blinked, staring over at Lin as he held out a cloth to help measure Sam. Angelica's eyes were at the same spot, but eventually, she sighed and when back to her own sewing, "Lafayette told me what he was saying, Hercules. We're so close.""This feels wrong." Hercules frowned, sewing one of Lafayette's skirts, "like, we're letting Lin figure it out. And...it's like something is blocking him from remembering.""What would be doing that?""He was murdered," Hercules said slowly, eyes downcast when he remembered being friends with the man, "maybe it's a defense mechanism from his mind or something? God, I don't know. I just...want my friend back. I really didn't see him after Yorktown and I regret it."Angelica rested a hand on his shoulder and blinked, "Don't worry, I promise he'll remember soon. You heard what Lafayette said, right?" "Yeah." "Tomorrow and tomorrow creep in this petty place from day to day." Thomas read from the worn copy of Macbeth, "Okay, you know what? How can anyone do this? I speak English fine and I can't do this!"Lin tossed his head back and laughed, the wig of black hair hung loose and synthetic hair hung down to past his shoulders. "At least Hale isn't making you be Lady Macbeth! When it gets to our scene I get to drape myself all over you and say, Screw your courage to the sticking place. I didn't Shakespeare back in high school and I sure as hell don't like it now."Thomas blinked, "Well, I always thought it was fine. But, the problem is, I just don't like going...in front of people.""You do realize you're in theater club right?" "Eh, James didn't want to do it alone so I figured I'd be a good friend." Jefferson offered, his voice an octave higher like a liar, "My anxiety just gets really bad when I go on stage and I just can't breathe when there are so many people watching me." Lin was watching him, eyebrows raised as if he wasn't expecting that answer, "Maybe, I'm just not a good person to be doing this."Lin smiled, dark eyes glittering from behind the mop of fake hair, "Oh don't worry, just keep your eyes on me. I won't let you be alone up there."Jefferson smiled and wondered if Hamilton was going to hate him more when he woke up."Lin," George sang to him once they were back in their dorm after theater practice, "how was it working with one of the asshats?""Jefferson is weird." He said simply, "Not in the way you'd expect. He's just really human. Like, I always hear stories about Thomas Jefferson being this larger than life figure in Cabinet Meetings but now...he doesn't like being in front of people. I don't know, he's just weird."Sam whistled through his teeth and collapsed back onto his bed, Chase was already climbing the ladder to his bed. Sam kicked off his shoes and continued, "Weird doesn't explain him and his Democratic-Republican buddies showing up at our dorm, you know?"Chase yawned, "I'm honestly game to forget about it. At most, they were probably trying to scare us or something.""They went after Lin." George reminded them, "So they were probably looking for someone else to join their debate team. But, hey, I agree with Chase. Though, they're still team asshat to me.""Can we all agree on that?" Lin laughed. A chorus of 'Yeah's' echoed through the dorm and George just kicked off his shoes, "Oh dear me. It looks like we have Team Asshat versus what? Team Torie? We do have our own King to be loyal to."George chuckled, "So, I'm royalty now?""Long live the King!" Sam proclaimed loudly, "Team Torie for life!""Team Torie for life." They laughed. Each echoing the phrase, except Lin. Who just continued to laugh despite the horrible knot of some horrid emotion tying itself into his stomach.
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Washington considered himself a patient man, he always would. He had the patience to outlast Valley Forge, he had the patience not to strangle his Secretary of State and Treasury Secretary, hell, he had the patience to not kick the door down to congress when he saw Political Parties forming. So, yes, in his own opinion, he was a patient man. Except, now his revered patience was starting to thin.He frowned, staring at Andrew Jackson-a young man with an odd sense of entitlement despite the fact he was widely regarded as America's Most Disappointing President, utterly tearing into Lin. Their names had been drawn up for a random debate and the debate topic drawn had been Immigration. Washington had asked if Lin would have liked the topic changed, but Lin shook his head when he saw Jackson's eye roll.Washington was regretting it."Oh come on," Jackson spat at Lin and causing the other man to shrink back slightly, "everyone knows that immigrants are the causes for the American job problem. If we got them out then Americans wouldn't have to struggle to find work.""A-Actually," Lin was stuttering and fumbling with his words. Washington shared a glanced with Jefferson and he could practically feel the want to protect radiating from the other man, Washington blinked and fought the urge not to smile. Oh, how the times had changed, "unemployment is at a low and immigration is at a high with the refugees entering from the crisis in the middle-"Jackson snorted and took a dangerous step forward, Lin held his ground but his shoulders hunched, "Oh, don't talk about the middle east. Look south! We have Illegals coming in left and right.""The American Dream is something people-""Legal people," Jackson cut him off, "we just need to get rid of the illegal ones that are taking up too much room here. Too much room that Americans-""So you want another Trail of Tears?" Lin finally snapped and Washington blinked at the way he suddenly got so angry. It was like lightning, dangerous and white hot, A bunch of people around 'oohed' and a cheer went up from the Revolutionary Set, "Another nail in your coffin."Jackson's eyes flared and this time he didn't take a step, he practically lunged forward and hauled Lin up by his sweatshirt until they were face to face. Lin visibly paled and when Washington saw Jackson raise his hand to strike the smaller man, he stood. "Gentlemen."He saw Jefferson on his feet, Madison next to him and a fuming Lafayette holding Laurens back with a hand. Jackson glanced at Washington and dropped Lin, who scrambled up from his place on the floor and danced back towards Chase and Sam. Washington stalked forwards towards the younger reincarnate and simply said, "I will not tolerate violence in a formal debate. Am I understood?""Sir-""Am I understood?"Jackson blinked in terror and stepped back. He nodded and his shoulders drooped, "Yes, Sir."Washington turned to address the rest of the people in the room and Jackson scrambled back to his seat. "Now, you're all free to go. But, if I ever, see violence in this room again, I will not hesitate to tear into you. So, get out of my classroom." The last sentence had a lighter tone but it didn't stop a lot of students from retreating from the room, Jackson and his friends many of them.The room was empty when he was approached by the Revolutionary Set with Jefferson and Madison with them. Washington blinked and Jefferson practically growled, "You need to do something about Jackson. He's out of line.""I'm with Jefferson," Hercules blinked, eyes narrowed and his jaw set in a way that reminded Washington of the man who hadn't hesitated to kill British soldiers, "I've heard about him shoving a bunch of other people around and being a huge dick all around."Lafayette looked like they were going to rip Jefferson in two, or at least cut into them with a saber, "Mon ami is right. If he goes for Lin one more time, mon petit lion won't need to defend himself."The threat was there and Washington knew it. He blinked. "I'll handle it. Jackson isn't going to be hurting anyone."Laurens rolled his eyes and went to say something, but Madison cut him off first. "Did none of you see it?""See what?" Was the chorus that followed."Lin defended himself," Madison chuckled, an odd light in his dark eyes, "Hamilton Style." "I'm going to stab him," Peggy chuckled, eyeing the way Jackson complained about debate club with his friends, "I'm going to stab him and no one is ever going to know."Sam laughed, leaning forward slightly as he adjusted his English textbook on his lap, "Oh trust me, I was about to. I never thought I'd see Chase lunge at a man, but had I not grabbed him he probably would have fought him right there."Peggy grinned wide and set their textbook on the table, staring down their partner for her English 101 introduction project, "So, tell me, what's the story with you and Lin? I see you two together all the time!"Sam flushed scarlet and Peggy's grin cracked into a sly smile. Gotcha. They let out a playful squeal and smacked his shoulder, "Oh, wait. Do you like him?""I...guess?" Sam chuckled, carding fingers through his hair before continuing, "He's always been really nice to me, but I'm ninety percent sure George would gut me if I went for it, you know? He's really protective of Lin.""Why?""You don't know?" "No," Eliza whispered, eyes wide as Peggy delivered the information to the rest of the group, "no way."Maria shook her head and glanced at the other members of the group. Jefferson was shaking like he was about to burst into laughter, which he probably was. The Revolutionary Set seemed utterly confused at the irony. Washington just looked utterly exasperated from the way he held his face in his hands. Peggy seemed like they was about to break into hysterics, "You guys honestly don't get how funny this is."Madison blinked, pondering the situation, "Well, that explains the money for Columbia. This place isn't exactly cheap, you know?"Angelica sighed and leaned her head back against the wall, "If someone told me this information a month ago I would call them crazy. Why does this happen to us? Literally, what did we do?"Jefferson finally broke down and crowed with laughter, his head tossed back and an 'ahaha' sound following. It was loud. Burr, on the other hand, just pinched the bridge of his nose and sighed, "Honest to god, what are the odds that Alexander Hamilton is King George the Third's adoptive brother?" Washington blinked, grading papers was making his eyes sore but when he heard the door to his office open and close, he looked up. He blinked when he saw pale skin and the golden hair that belonged to one George King. He blinked and the British man simply smiled wide and kind before taking the seat across from Washington."Ah, Mr. King," Washington spoke slowly, eyes never leaving the reincarnated King, "what can I do for you? I don't have you in any of my classes so I don't know why'd you be here.""I know you know about me." King simply said as he leaned forward, elbows on the desk separating them as his blue eye sparkled, "And don't lie, Professor, or should I say General?"The two stared at one another for a long moment of silence, two predators circling each other and neither was about to give up. King's intense stare broke as he broke off into a low laugh, "Oh, come on. What can I do? I'm a little college student.""You're King George the Third," Washington pointed out, raising an eyebrow, "and you're the only person in the world who has a reincarnate claim to the English throne. So, why not take your chance?""Ah," King chuckled and an odd heat glowed to life in his eyes, "but I'm American now. What are the odds of that much irony?"Washington blinked and set down his pen, staring the blonde in the eyes, "What does that have to do with anything?""Oh, it has to do with a lot. It's one of the reasons I'm George King and will always be that way. Besides," he laughed, something long and more high pitched, "who wants to know that the king who went crazy is back?""You're angry that you can't claim back your throne?"King shook his head and waved a hand, a dismissive gesture, "Oh no, of course not. Who do you take me for? I'm just a bit...salty that I'm stuck here when everyone else around me is a reincarnate.""What do you mean? Who do you mean?""Everyone. You. Your debate team. Chase. Sam." He paused for a moment and plucked a candy from the dish, before making eye contact and practically purring, "Lin.""So you know." It wasn't a question. Washington knew questions when he heard them, but that wasn't a question. It was a jab, something to make him falter. Washington didn't fall for it, "And so does everyone else who it pertains to. Now, your majesty, why are you here really?"King blinked and his smile dropped. All the heated light in his blue eyes died and the look he gave Washington was dead. "I want to know what you're going to do to Lin. Sam told me how your little group knows about my family ties.""We're not going to hurt him," Washington replied simply, turning his attention back to the paper in front of him, "we just want our friend back."Washington didn't look back up when he was met with silence. He didn't have to since he knew very well that King was grinning, whether it was malicious or somewhat happy, he honestly didn't want to find out. There had always been rumors in the colonies of the crazy king, just small things to further the revolution, but now they were beginning to seem a lot truer."Just checking." Burr, to say the least, was struggling. It wasn't fair. He knew the others were blaming him for this mess. How was he supposed to know back then that Hamilton wouldn't come around for over two hundred years? He ignored the chastising voice in his head that seemed to purr You didn't know about reincarnation either. You just wanted him dead. He hated to admit it was right. He sighed. He couldn't even find Theodosia, so that left him alone with the people who had more reasons to hate him than not. Even now, Hamilton's life still had the utmost effect on his. "Burr!" Lin called as he walked over, papers being waved at him as the shorter man practically bounded over to him. His smile was wide and Burr felt a knot tying itself into his stomach, "Some of the papers for your column got into my stack. Here you go. I read your draft though, it's really good." "Thanks," Burr replied, smiling himself as Lin handed him the papers, their hands brushing slightly, "how's your column coming along? The stories are due by Friday."Lin's dark eyes glittered in the white light before he smiled even wider, "Oh, it's going great! I'm already in my editing stage. Franklin was saying how I should write the marching band section for the sports column.""More work the better?""Nah, I just like writing. I am a theater and writing after afterall."Burr couldn't help but smile at the way Lin's smile was wider than when it started. Lin seemed to laugh, a hand reached up to comb through his dark hair before he simply said, "Even though you seem to be better at it than I am. You'll do great in law!"He blinked simply in return, caught between How did he know I was a Pre-Law major? I haven't announced it. and You should be better at writing than me. You wrote until you ran out of time. Burr blinked himself from the stupor and clapped Lin on the shoulder as he chuckled, "Oh, thank you very much. Good to know I have someone on my side in this."Lin's face flushed a blood red scarlet and he just nodded before slipping away back to his desk. Burr blinked at the odd interaction before he turned, only to jump back at the way Laurens was smiling at him, eyebrows waggling at him. "Another person on the side, Burr?" Laurens jabbed at him with his two index fingers poking him repeatedly in the chest, using the same tone he did all those years ago at Hamilton's wedding reception, "Oh, come on, don't look so scared! I'm just messing.""Yeah," Burr replied, not looking at Laurens but at the area beside him where Lin had been only a few moments prior, "I know." "What has you so rattled?" Madison asked when he saw Lin sitting on the edge of the stage, a plastic water bottle between his hands. Jefferson wasn't with him today, preferring to stay in the dorm nursing a migraine as a shivering lump under his blankets with the curtains drawn. Lin looked up at him and blinked. Madison only raised an eyebrow and sat down next to him, "Come on, I don't bite usually!"Lin laughed, took a swig of his water before glancing at Madison, "What's it like being James Madison?""What do you mean?""Like," Lin frowned as if he was looking for a word to describe it, but he eventually said, "how did you know? What was it like...waking up? I always hear about how you guys, the revolutionaries I mean, are the greatest people in American history, but I never really understood you guys."Madison laughed tightly as the first question hit him. He blinked. Maybe a description could trigger an awakening or something? He didn't know, but he wasn't scared enough to not try. "You know when you zone out and sort of...forget what you're doing? It was like that. Like I was zoned out when I wasn't, well James Madison me, and then it all came back to me later. I think that's why our names are legally changed once we're officiated as reincarnated?"Lin laughed before the smile fell and he stared off into the theater, eyes far away, "Pretty interesting.""I just remember as a kid," Madison continued, waving a hand in a nonchalant gesture, but Lin only continued staring into the theater like he was caught up in a memory of his own, "having all of these weird feelings, then it went into full on flashbacks. I know Thomas woke up with his memories restored, but I had these horrible headaches for weeks and then one day I just remembered."The other man still didn't say anything, so Madison just finished, "Well, I know it's different for everyone. You just have to wait until you get yours, I guess."And there was silence between the two. It lasted for a few minutes before Lin finally broke the silence, "We were working on a set today. It's supposed to be a stormy set but I made sure it had a yellow sky. I don't know why it had to be a yellow sky...I just...knew it was supposed to be yellow."Madison said nothing, instead, he just placed a hand on Lin's shoulder. And the silence between them was sufficient. Hercules, for all the times he had passed by Lin, rarely talked to him. It was always pleasantries, a few attempts at commentaries on various things, but other than that it was nothing. They weren't enemies, but not friends. More acquaintances who knew one another and had no opinion. Hercules wanted to change that. Everyone else wanted him to change that. "Come on, mon ami," Lafayette pushed one day when they were at the library, Lin was a few shelves over working on something for his english course, "talk to him. About sewing or something! We can add him to the Revolutionary Set again if he's our friend!""I don't know," Hercules sighed as he passed Lafayette a book, in return, they placed it high on the shelf, "I don't want to come off as creepy, you know? Like I can't just sit down next to him randomly like we've been best friends since grade school, you know?""Go." Lafayette said to him once the books were all returned, his voice was commanding and it reminded Hercules that Lafayette was still every ounce a Major General, "Talk to him! Otherwise, I'm locking you out of the room and you'll be sleeping in the hallway."He laughed. "John, hell, Burr would let me in.""Oh really?" An eyebrow was raised, finely sculpted and Hercules knew there was no winning.
"Fine."
Lafayette giggled and walking away, heels clicking oddly against the thin carpet covering the hardwood beneath. Hercules sighed and made his way through the maze of shelves before he stopped. His eyes went wide and he chuckled. Sitting in front of him was Lin. The man was knelt over, head resting on crossed arms as he was illuminated by the light of his laptop. Hercules walked forward and blinked when he Lin's closed eyes and his long lashes as dark smears on his cheeks. He let out a sigh and reached over Lin's sleeping form, saving the essay before closing out of the writing program. He shut down the laptop and closed it before scribbling down a note on a scrap piece of paper. Honestly, it was a split-second decision he made as he shimmied out of his coat. He draped it over the small man and watching the large coat practically hide him away from the outside world. Hercules smiled, remembered doing this often during the times he was in camp during the revolution or at least carrying a sleeping Hamilton to his own tent. He fought the urge to ruffle his messy hair and simply walked away to find Lafayette.
Lin,
I saved your essay and put away your notes in the folder under your laptop. Get some more sleep, you've been looking really tired.
Also, could you please return my coat at the next and easiest possible time? No need to stress about it.
- Hercules Mulligan
"Oh!" Lin blinked as he heard Chase laugh loudly as he walked in, "What was keeping you so long? Or should I say who?"Chase was laughing and Lin just shook his head, smirking slightly at a number of hysterical giggles that his late entrance was receiving. "I just had the weirdest experience at the library.""Is that what these young kids are calling it nowadays?""Piss off, Chase," Lin replied, smiling all the while, "you guys know that one Hercules Mulligan guy?" There were nods and Lin just continued, "Well, I fell asleep at the table and then he turned off my laptop and put my stuff away for me. He then left me this note." He passed it to a very confused looking Sam before finally finishing with, "And then he covered me up with his coat."Sam blinked as he finished reading the note before handing it upwards to Chase. George was staring at his adopted brother with raised eyebrows as he said, "That's weird. What did you do or is Mulligan like the Grade A Dad Friend?""I think the second one?" Sam offered to everyone's surprise, "He fixes everyone's clothes. And not to mention he bought me food one day randomly. Like, I didn't even ask or anything. He just gave it to me and said something about me losing too much weight? What?"Lin blinked and frowned slightly. Chase caught it and naturally called him out, "What's eating you up about it? He was being nice.""I feel like he's done that before." Lin blinked, brows knitting further together as he glanced up at the note as Chase handed if off to George, "But...I don't remember him ever doing that, you know? Now that I think about it...that whole Revolutionary Set has always been freakishly nice and forward to me?"Sam blinked, eyebrows raising, "Maybe they think you're one of them?""Oh," Lin sighed, waving his hand and dismissing it, "I highly doubt it. Who would think that me of all people could possibly be a reincarnate?"
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
Maria couldn't help but laugh when she saw a very disgruntled George King walking towards her, coffee in hand with his blonde hair sticking up in every direction. He looked tired and a solid ninety percent dead, but that didn't distract from the bright red color he was wearing. He yawned, his blue eyes flicked to her and he stopped. He blinked at her for an odd moment but before Maria could ask what he wanted he smiled, "Oh, my! Ms. Maria Reynolds! May I accompany you?""What do you want, your highness?" She replied, not giving him an answer but she knew telling him to piss off wouldn't have sent him away, "And why are you calling me that?"He chuckled, "Oh, no reason. So, a little birdie around campus told me you're looking for someone. It is true?""Why do you care?""I know it's not Lin." George seemed to sing, sipping his coffee. The light caught his pale skin and Maria blinked at the bruises under his eyes, "Shall I take a guess about who it is? Oh, there are so many men to guess!"Maria growled and stopped. She swung around, long dark hair flaring out as she grabbed the Reincarnated King by the collar, "Why do you care?"And he laughed. Maria blinked and flashed back to Washington reporting that King was awake and kicking. "All of you need to be careful around King. He knows who all of you are and he's just...off. There's something there and it doesn't look good." Maria let him go and he took a step back. His laughed cut down to chuckling at he smoothed over his red shirt, "Oh, no reason.""King, I will gut you like a fish.""You're looking for a Mister James Reynolds aren't you?"She paused. Her red nails dug into her palms and she took a step forward. George only sipped his coffee, eyebrows raised as if he was daring her to hit him. Maria took a steadying breath, "I am.""Why?""He made my life hell." Maria spat angrily, her face heating up with the rage she was feeling, "He threatened my daughter. He practically whored me out! He ruined all of us and if I see that bastard here I'm going to make sure he knows what he did."George raised an eyebrow. "You've met him in a past life?"She blinked her shoulders dropped, remembering traveling the country to Golden California, a dust bowl on her heels. She had traveled with her family to California and ended up working on a peach farm under James Reynolds. Maria blinked when she remembered how he felt entitled to her and it filled her with rage. He always seemed to show up where she was. But this life was going to be different.She had friends to back her up, Maria wasn't going to let him torture her this time around."Yes.""I heard about a third-year transfer student that claims to be from the revolution," George said to no one in particular, eyes staring at the cloudy morning sky above Maria's head, "and according to Lin, he's a real ass to everyone in his advanced economics."Maria blinked in confusion. Economics. He always had wanted to be up in the ranks of Alexander Hamilton. She frowned, back when they were married in the seventeen hundred he always talked about Hamilton. It had been an obsession. "How does Alexander Hamilton get everything? I worked for it! He was given it!" She remembered his yelling, she remembered telling their daughter to run along and go play in the street with her friends, she remembered the bruises, "I'm going to ruin that whore's son! And I know just the way to do it.""Maria?" George asked, leaning forward to the point his blue eyes were all she could pay attention to. They reflected the sky. "Are you alright?""Yes, sorry." Maria shook herself from the memories, remembering that this body wasn't bruised by him. She remembered that it wasn't going to,"What makes you think it's this transfer student?"George's relieved smile dropped and his face was as emotionless as stone. "Do you remember that one research paper published a few years ago? The one talking about the relationship between dreams and resurfacing memories?""Yeah, Freud wrote it didn't he?" She asked, remembering the big explosion in the Reincarnated Science community that Freud was back. She naturally read it, of course. Being the only Reincarnate in a school of over seven hundred people made her desperate to find someone, anyone. "Why does that matter?""Lin talks in his sleep."And Maria froze."What does he say?""Odd things," George shrugged half-heartedly, "things about hurricanes and revolutions. He speaks in French but doesn't know it when he's awake. And he mentions people. A lot of people.""Who?""He talks about someone named Phillip, his son I presume, he goes on about dead soldiers," George blinked, finishing his coffee before continuing, "He talks about James Reynolds. It's been getting worse and more reoccurring ever since he started talking about that transfer student. I think he's recognizing him or something. Sam and Chase sleep like the dead but I think they're starting to notice."Maria blinked and just blanched at this resolution. This wasn't good, not at all. "Who is this transfer student?""Ronald James.""Very original." Maria sighed, storing the name for a later date. She could have Angelica pull up his records, perks of Student Council. "What else does Lin talk about?" She blinked and waited for George to reply.And he did."He talks about you.""What does he say?""That he's sorry." "Oh," Chase grinned as he sat down across from John Laurens, laptop in hands as John looked up at him from his phone, "Hey, John. Ready to work on the debate topic for Washington? From what Sam has told me, it looks like Angelica and Sam might just kick our asses."John grinned, but from what Chase could tell it wasn't a friendly smile. He blinked and tried not to frown. He hadn't done anything to John as far he could tell. So, why would he be mean to him? It didn't make sense, but Chase decided to sit down anyway. "So, I've been thinking since for the debate that we're Against, we could start with the extreme poverty that's been around since the 1800s?"The reincarnate blinked and nodded, he shrugged before even saying, "Sure, we can do that." Something in his eyes flashed and he leaned forward, "But it is a very intimidating topic, so are you going to, you know, retreat from it?"Chase blinked at the phrase. "I wouldn't?"Something in John's eyes flashed and Chase scooted back slightly. Something wasn't right. He had never said a word to him! So, why was John mad him? Chase swallowed, felt a twinge behind his eyes and looked up. John had leaned forward, a dangerous shadow across his features. Chase blinked."What did I do to you?" Chase asked suddenly. His fight or flight senses were starting to kick in and he had chosen fight. "I've never even had a one-on-one conversation with you before.""I know who you were," John grumbled and Chase furrowed his brow, the twinge behind his eyes was getting worse. "We knew each other from the war. Don't you remember? Don't you remember me of all people?""I-I don't know what you're talking about." Chase frowned and he glanced at his hands, why were they shaking? It felt like there was dirt stuck under his nails yet there wasn't. He shook his head and looked up at John and he could have sworn John was wearing blue, not his gray hoodie, "I don't think I'm a reincarnate?"John chuckled, "Oh, don't be so sure.""Who would I even be?!"John leaned forward and something flashed across his green eyes. It was something angry, yet sad all the same. Almost like John felt bad for doing this, yet angry at the fact that Chase had done something to him before. John blinked."Charles Lee."And Chase sat back, spine ramrod straight. His heart pounded in his ears and it hurt to breathe. It was suddenly too hot but his hands felt so numb from coldness. John looked horrified from the reaction as he reached his hand forward, almost as if he was going to grab Chase. Chase blinked and suddenly it all came flooding back.
There was too much blood. And it was too hot. There were too many people dying, too many British soldiers that came storming through their ranks. The redcoats went down in smears of red but it was useless because so many of their own had gone down too. So many people were dying, their moans and pained screams were beginning to become the same white noise that gun shots and horse noises were. The sun was beating down on them. And Washington, the god atop the snow white horse was crying for them to move forward. It was hopeless, too many men were dying. They weren't going to make it. Retreat and regroup.
Charles held his breath and felt the hot blood dripping down his face. It wasn't his, it was from the writhing mass of man at his feet. He swallowed and before he could even stop the man's suffering with his sword, the man stopped moving. Charles heard one of his own die from somewhere beside him. He swallowed and finally screamed, "Retreat!"
Aaron Burr was across from him, the man's arms were crossed and his brow was furrowed. "General, it's not wise for you to do this. Laurens is insane, he's practically insubordinate. Please, don't do this. His Excellency wouldn't hesitate to discharge all of you for this."
"Laurens challenged me," Charles amended as he rested a hand on Burr's shoulder, "all I need you to do is negotiate a peace with Hamilton. If we can stop this mess then you'll finally get the credit you deserve."
Burr blinked. "I don't agree with it."
"You don't have to, I just need a number two."
"Fine."
Oh god. He'd been shot. Laurens had shot him. He was dying. He was dying. Burr was at his side and his shaking hands were doing their best to staunch the flow of blood from his side. His face was in the cold dirt, nails clawing through the soft earth and embedding it under his nails. There was too much pain. It was suffocating him. He couldn't move. He couldn't breathe. He wasn't screaming.
"Lee," Hamilton laughed. Why was he laughing? This was his fault? Lee was dying and Hamilton was laughing, "do you yield?"
Burr looked up and something thunderous crossed his face. The hands staunching the blood flow tightened and Lee whined, the sound almost like a dying animal's whine. Charles sucked in a breath and his own shaking hands twitched up to his own side. They covered Burr's but did little to stop blood flow. Burr's voice was somewhere far off even though Charles could see his mouth moving.
"Shot him in the side," Burr snarled, "Yes! He yields!"
Charles was dying and his vision was beginning to blur, making Burr a dark smear against the blue sky. He coughed and could practically feel blood bubble up from his lips. He let out another wounded moan. Laurens cried from somewhere far away, "I'm satisfied."
And the duel was done.
"We have to clear the field!" Burr shouted and Lee understood. It was a gunshot and there were no battles. The general would have heard it. His Excellency would be coming and Charles didn't want to know if there would be punishment or not.
Hamilton sounded outraged. Charles' hands went slack and Burr's head snapped down to face the man in the dirt, "No, we won!"
Everything was going black as the sound of hooves filled the air. Charles closed his eyes.
Funny, he thought later as he woke up in the surgical tent, Hamilton went home. And so will I.
And Lee blinked back into the present. He looked up at John with wide eyes, but the other man was just staring at him. His face betrayed no emotion, but there was something in his eyes that was more than enough for Lee to realize one important thing: John didn't like doing this. He blinked, made a strangled noise and stood. John said nothing and just watched in silence as Lee shoved all of his belongings into his bag. Lee left and wasn't followed. Peggy, to say the least, was very annoyed and slightly confused. Like, who the hell gets locked in the music building? They had fallen asleep while waiting for Eliza to finish her assignment for choir, but when they had woken up it was almost two in the morning. Peggy groaned again as they pushed against the door to the outside. It wouldn't budge. Neither had any of the other exits. They were stuck here.No one had answered their phone yet, so there was no way for them to get out. "Damn it," They groaned, turning back into the dark hallway, "why is it always me?" There was no answer. For a little while at least. They paused when they heard a door close. Peggy sat up from where they had thrown themselves onto the couch and just blinked in shock the second they saw Lin walking into the foyer of the building. The door to the stairwell closed behind him and Peggy blinked. He didn't look stressed about being locked in, hell, he looked like he didn't care about the fact. "Lin?"He jumped and whirled around to face them, eyes wide but the second he saw Peggy he blinked and physically relaxed. He smiled, "Peggy, oh thank god. I thought you were some psycho killer or something.""Surprise?" They laughed as they jumped up from the couch, "But, what are you doing here? It's like two in the morning." "I guess I could ask you the same thing," Lin chuckled, "Well, believe it or not, this isn't the first time. After the third time in a week, the janitor gave me a key. Made me promise not to mess with anything, so I guess it's a fair trade-off." "Isn't that really against school rules?" Peggy raised an eyebrow and crossed their arms over their chest, "Like, grounds for expulsion?"Lin grinned and proceeded to unlock the door, "Well, I highly doubt you'd tell anyone, right?" Peggy blinked, "No one has to know.""I'll walk you back, our dorms are in the buildings right next to each other." Lin offered as he locked the door again behind him. He stuffed the key ring into his pocket before letting out a sigh, "What were you doing here, Pegs?" "Eliza had to do something for choir and I passed out on the couch," Peggy explained, "and no one noticed when they were closing up. How the hell does that happen?""No clue," Lin laughed. "What were you doing there?" Peggy said simply, "You never answered me when I asked you in the first place." And Lin laughed. It was an odd sound, friendly and nothing bad in it, but it was an awkward laugh. Like Peggy caught him doing something he shouldn't have been doing. Lin, after a few moments, finally shrugged and just said, "I was working in the recording studio.""With what?" "Just a little thing I've been working on," He answered and Peggy snorted at the vagueness, "I've been testing out the sounds for some of the songs. Different tempos, instruments, pacings, you know?" "You're writing a musical?""Ya got me." Lin chuckled and Peggy blinked in shock at the man beside them, "I haven't really told anyone yet, so you mind keeping it quiet for me? I don't want George's parents throwing in a couple grand to get it pushed up at Broadway or something."The two stopped outside of the girl's dorm and Peggy, instead of going inside, they turned to the man beside her, "I thought they were your parents too.""As far as the United States and paperwork are concerned, they are," Lin replied, dark eyes meeting Peggy's, he let out a sigh and his warm breath was fog in the chilling air, "but, I don't consider them to be. They picked me up from the Carribean when I was fourteen because they pitied me for some reason, or maybe it was just the rich white people reason."They had never heard such an odd bitterness in Lin's voice before and it sent an uncomfortable shiver up their spine. They remembered Alexander only sounding this bitter when he talked about how his half-brother on his mother's side had taken all land that he should have inherited from his deceased mother. They, or at that time she, had only heard it once. And Alexander had been drunk from a Fourth of July celebration where veterans had kept buying him drinks. "Why would you think that?""I like his parents, don't get me wrong here, they're nice and great people," Lin amended first but then he just gestured with his hands as he continued, "but they had never even been to Nevis before the hurricane and they only came to check on their damn hotel there. It wasn't for relief, it wasn't for aid, it was for their own profit. They only met me because Mr. King took a tumble down some stairs.""How does Papa King taking a tumbling end with meeting you then?""Both in the hospital. My parents and what was left of my family were dead so I had to wait for child services or whatever to come get me." He shrugged like he had said that so many times, he shrugged like it didn't bother him anymore. And it made Peggy frown. "Then I meet the missus and suddenly I'm King child numero dos."Peggy frowned. This wasn't right. Why was he telling them this? His shaking hands was more than enough to answer the question. Sleep deprivation seemed to be pretty big no matter what life Alexander was living. Peggy placed a hand on his shoulder and offered a smile, "Why were you in the hospital?" "Who wasn't? The only place with clean water." Lin chuckled. Peggy knew he was lying. And then he paused, "Wait...why am I telling you this?""It's almost three in the morning and you probably haven't slept in three days." Lin blinked and Peggy continued, "Lin, what if you go to bed and I promise not to tell anyone what happened tonight? Okay?""Okay." He nodded. And then Peggy patted his shoulder and walked away. They glanced back the second the door had shut and saw that Lin was already gone. They frowned. They knew he wasn't telling the whole truth. Something was wrong and Peggy was starting to form a hypothesis. Washington sat back in his office chair as John explained what he had done. He ran a hand over his face and sighed into his palm before taking it away and looking the younger reincarnate in the eyes, "You did what?"John flinched at the tone but held his ground. "I knew that if we could get Charles Lee to wake up, then maybe Lin wouldn't be so unopen to the idea of being a reincarnate.""You don't realize what you've done.""Sir-""Laurens," His voice thundered in the room and John straightened instantly into a soldier's posture, "That was not your place. You forced Lee to wake up, you forced a human being into another life he had no idea he had. As far as we both knew, he had no idea who he was!""Sir-""Be quiet." Washington thundered as he stood, hands braced on the desk. Laurens paled but shut his mouth and bowed his head submissively as if he was ready to take the scolding. "Laurens, please, understand what you've done. You know the stories, hell, you remember how scared you were remembering naturally. You forced Lee into something he wasn't ready for. You took something from him. And you don't know what he's going to do. He's remembering a completely different life while living this one. That fact has destroyed some people. Do you remember what happened to that twelve-year-old boy who had been revealed to be Julius Caesar a few years back?"Laurens stayed quiet but Washington only punctuated what he was about to say, "He killed himself. He killed himself because there was too much and he didn't know what to do with it and he didn't understand what was happening. So, tell me, Laurens, do you realize what you might have caused?!""I do, Sir." It was quiet but an answer nonetheless. And Washington sighed as he sat down, the rage leaving his body. His shoulders sagged and he shook his head, "Please, tell me why you did it."And Laurens looked up. His eyes glittering with unshed tears. He let out a ragged breath that sounded wrong. "I miss Alexander." "What did you need," Sam asked as he stood alone in the quiet and too empty classroom, he had never felt so small in his life, he gestured to the three in front of him as he said their names "Jefferson, Madison, Burr?"The three Democratic-Republicans just stared at him and Sam swallowed. It was like being circled by predators because despite him being closest to the door, there was no way they would let him leave. Madison spoke first, it was almost comforting but Sam knew better. He had read enough to know that where Jefferson had been the big figure, Madison had the power. Burr, on the other hand, had been an odd mediator that had been pushed out before he even had the chance to do something to put him in the room where it happened. "Mr. Shepherd, we were wondering if you'd like to help us?""Sorry," Sam replied instantly, "I promised not to help Team Asshat. My dorm is signed onto Team Torie.""Hear us out." That was Jefferson.Sam turned to leave."It's about Lin." And that was Burr.Sam stopped. "Talk fast, I'm listening for now."Jefferson spoke up and uncrossed his arms from over his chest, "We know Lin's one of us. A reincarnate. We wanted to know if you'd be willing to help us out.""With what?""Jogging his memories."And Sam snorted, "Oh please, you want me to help you with that of all things? What would I even do? Take him to a museum and 'My God! Lin would you look at the portrait of Alexander Hamilton. He looks just like you!'."Burr furrowed his brow and leaned forward slightly, "How did you know who Lin was?" "It wasn't hard and I'm not stupid," Sam growled out as he took a step forward, an odd feeling of protectiveness rising in his chest, "when you three dumbasses showed up at my dorm asking for Lin it wasn't too hard to figure out. Who did you two," he pointed to Jefferson and Madison, "have in common? Someone in Washington's cabinet. And who would Burr be looking for as well? Easy. Alexander Hamilton."No one could argue with that logic. Madison cleared his throat, "Would you like to help us?""I'm not going to make Lin wake up, it's not right. It's like murder. Because then he's just Alexander Hamilton again and Lin doesn't exist anymore." Sam spat, "It's sick and twisted and I shouldn't make Lin give up his life to be someone else."No one said a thing for a single moment, but then Sam saw the way something flashed in Jefferson's eyes. He swallowed. Now he knew why the man was feared all those years ago, he could catch things you never said. And he wouldn't hesitate to use them against you. Jefferson tossed his head back and it was full on body shakes and 'ahaha' echoing throughout the empty classroom. Everyone was staring at Jefferson until he was done. "Oh my God," Jefferson said suddenly, body snapping forward so he could look Seabury in the eye, "you like him. Lin, that is. You don't want to help us because then that ruins your chances!""Shut up." Sam growled, cheeks blazing and that was how he knew the Democratic-Republicans had won, "Shut up! You don't know anything. What use would having Hamilton back be? You were at each other's throats constantly!""Believe it or not," Burr spoke for the three this time, "Hamilton was actually vital to us. We need him back if we want it to be a complete set again. And we all do, besides, there are plenty of people who would die to see him now.""Who?""Well, plenty of members from the continental congress-"Sam blinked and whirled on the man. He shouted, for the first time in his life, at the other man, "Well, that Congress does not speak for me!" Burr froze and his eyebrows rose. His jaw dropped slightly but Sam only continued, "You're all selfish. You don't realize that what you're doing is going to end Lin. You're disgusting." Sam moved towards the door and he paused once he opened it. He threw only two words over his shoulder before storming out, "For shame."And he was gone.And Jefferson let out a breath. "Well, that went well." He glanced over at the frowning Madison but then his eyes caught sight of the way Burr hadn't moved and his shocked expression was still on the door Sam had exited from. "Burr, what's wrong?""I...I know him." He blinked, "I met him back in 1776. Oh my god, he's Samuel Seabury.""What does he have to do with anything?""He's the Farmer...and Alexander wrote The Farmer Refuted." Lin enjoyed Wednesdays. It was the only day that he, miraculously, had no classes. He could sit back and relax, hell, even sleep if he felt like it. He had the time to! He lounged back on his bunk and glanced at his watch. It was still early, more five in the morning early, but he thought it was more than enough sleep. He could just go work-"Lin," George yawned, punching the mattress above him as he sat up, and Lin moved at the pressure below him, "go back to sleep. I can hear you thinking.""Sorry George," Lin chuckled, but when he glanced over at the bunks beside them, he saw Sam asleep with his headphones on, a low thrum of music in his ears, while Chase's bed was empty, "just woke up.""What's on your mind?"Lin rolled over and faced the wall, "I think there's something weird happening at the school.""What do you mean?""Like," Lin yawned but continued talking, "there's been so many reincarnates here. And they seem to all be talking to me! And then there's this weird guy in my economics class and he's really weird. He keeps arguing with me and is just really mean to me.""How?""Called me a Creole Bastard." Lin yawned and snuggled deeper into his blankets, "I haven't been called that before. A few other people in the class roasted him for it, but it just felt weird...like I've heard that before.""Was is that John Adams guy?""No. The new guy I was telling you about," Lin slurred out, "He hates me for some reason. I think he's friends with Jackson or someone like that. They all seem to hate me for no reason.""You could always have one of those other reincarnates fight them for you?"And Lin was laughing, "Oh please, 'Mr. Washington will you please fist fight Andrew Jackson and Ronald James in Denny's Parking Lot for me?'. Yeah, that would go over great!" "Definitely!" George laughed, "Well, I'm going back to bed. See ya later in the morning. Oh yeah, don't forget, Mom and Dad are coming back next weekend so we're going out to dinner with them. Don't forget!""Why do you think I forgot?""Did you remember?""No.""Exactly." George chuckled, "Now, Goodnight."
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
"Thank you, Tallmadge," Washington said offhandedly as he accepted the stack of tests from his TA. He glanced up and saw the way Tallmadge held out his phone towards him, "What's wrong?"The TA blinked as his superior accepted the phone, "I noticed a few more names added to the Government's Reincarnate Record.""Oh really?"The record was designed to keep all the names of reincarnated individuals in one place. Many had thought it to be a breach of privacy, but Washington had disagreed. It helped him find many of his friends, after all.Tallmadge nodded, "I noticed them this morning. They're from our time and they're from America."Washington scrolled and his eyes caught the bolded names."Oh my God.""I think you're talking about the closest three names." Tallmadge laughed to himself, "I've already looked. They go to college here.""So..." Washington sighed, handing the phone back to his TA before he continued on, "you're telling me that," he held up fingers as he counted off the three names he had read, "Pasty Jefferson," one finger, "Theodsia Burr Jr," a second finger, "and Philip Hamilton," and finally the third, "all go here?"Tallmadge nodded. "Yes, sir.""Why does the universe hate me?"The night air was getting colder as Eliza made her way through the crowd of bodies in marching band uniforms. The stadium was cheering as the as the sports team began to file onto the field for more warm up stretches. Eliza took off her plumed had when she saw Lin sitting by himself, hat off and a bottle of water in his hands as he stared off into space."Lin?" Eliza asked as she neared him, "What's wrong?"He blinked the second she spoke and once he saw her the calm expression he wore shifted into a warm smile that made Eliza melt. He scooted over on the instrument case so she could sit with him, "Oh, it's nothing. I guess I got a bit sidetracked."Eliza sat down next to him but held eye contact, "You can tell me if something is wrong, you know? I promise I won't bite your head off."Lin laughed at the mental image, "I don't know. I haven't been sleeping well lately and I guess it's finally starting to show.""How so?""I was sloppy at conducting tonight," He admitted, shoulders sagging, "and I just haven't been focused at all."Eliza couldn't argue with him. His movements had been a tad sloppy, but she had seen a lot worse during high school. She had also heard Angelica and Sam talking about his lack of usual focus. She pursed her lips, "You just probably need a good nights sleep is all!"Lin laughed but it was an odd and far away sound. He looked back at the crowd of assembled marching band members. "Yeah, maybe that would work? I sleep, I swear I do, but I just...dream."And the woman frowned. "If you don't mind me asking...what are they about?"And the man seemed to curl into himself, the light catching his features and allowing him to look utterly wrecked. Eliza swallowed, she knew those gaunt cheekbones, she knew those dark circles under his eyes, and she knew that glassy look in his eyes."How many essays are you up to now?" Eliza asked, hands curling into the emerald vest of her husband's clothing. The newspaper brandishing the new addition of The Federalist was in front of them, "Please. Tell me, talk to me. That would be enough."Alexander swallowed and looked up with the same wrecked expression, "Forty-three...but there's still so much work to do."Eliza almost didn't hear the way Lin said, "Yellow skies and cannon fire." "My life is supposed to be migraine free this time around!" Thomas yelled at the ceiling of the abandoned classroom. James was beside him, waiting patiently in the dark, "And it's not! I feel cheated. I'm suing! Wait...who would I even sue?"James let out a sigh and rubbed his forehead, "I can take you back to the dorm, you know. Ludington is going to be pissed if she finds out you're napping in her classroom.""Maybe she'll kill me and I can a restart.""You're hopeless.""My best feature!""I'm calling Aaron," James sighed as he moved towards the door, "and then we're going to drag you to the dorm. Understood?"A mock salute and a muffled, "Yes, Sir" was all that was heard as James left the room.And all was silent. Thomas kept his eyes closed as he breathed in the cool air of the empty classroom. It was nice, such a big room to himself. Ludington didn't have any classes today so he could lounge all he wanted, James be damned!A door clicked open and closed and Thomas threw a hand towards it, "James, I don't care! I'm waiting here!""Uh..." A new voice said, obviously confused as Thomas sat up and turned towards it, "my name isn't James?"Thomas squinted at the figure in the darkness as if it would help him identify the newcomer any easier. It didn't. He had no idea of who this was. He held the heel of his palm into his forehead as a stabbing pain worked its way into his skull, "Who are you?""Phillip." The newcomer said, Thomas heard a rattling and recognized the bottle. "Here, it helps with headaches. I literally got it from Walmart so you don't have to worry about popping someone else's pills.""Thanks."It wasn't until Thomas had already taken the headache medicine that Phillip moved closer. He could make out a puff of wild curls on the boy's shoulders. Thomas blinked and finally said, "Why are you even here, kid?""I've been looking for you, Mr. Jefferson.""Another history nut?" He ground out, "I've said no interviews or questions until I have my degree."Phillip blinked and smiled, Thomas could see the white gleam of straight and sharp-looking teeth, "Oh no, I'm not going to ask you anything. I wanted to help you.""You didn't answer my question, who are you?""Philip Hamilton, son of Alexander Hamilton." The boy said as if he had practiced multiple times, Thomas wouldn't be surprised if he did, "And I know where your daughter Patsy is.""Look what the cat dragged in," George King perked up at the slick voice growling behind him and he turned to face the newcomer, "can't say I'm surprised your majesty."George couldn't hold back the sly grin as he caught sight of the man who had spoken to him. He blinked and ignored the way Sam grabbed at his sleeve, a warning gesture against doing anything huge in the quad. "Isn't it a bit weird to refer to yourself in the third person, King Andrew?" Andrew Jackson narrowed his eyes as plenty of people around the quad laughed at the nickname. He had been torn apart enough for his past life, but this one seemed to have no redeeming qualities. He was just, in the politest way possible, an utter dick to everyone he wasn't friends with. "Don't play dumb, George.""Excuse me?" Sam was pulling him back, but that didn't stop Jackson from stalking forward, eyes narrowed and a murderous expression on his face. "You heard me. I know you were. Don't think just because you're rich you're untouchable."People were starting to gather and Sam tugged on his sleeve one last time, "George, come on. Ignore this as-""Shut your dog up." Jackson snarled suddenly and George felt Sam lurch back as if he had been struck, "Come on. I know who you are. It's not hard." People were beginning to whisper, pointing back and forth between Jackson and George. Jackson saw this and grinned, he gestured to George and called out, "Come on people, he's King George the Third!"George froze as the world went quiet. He gritted his teeth and eventually looked up, smiling wide and with more teeth than necessary, "You must think you're so smart, then Andy." "So, I'm right." "Yep," and Geroge would practically see the phones being whipped out to Google who the hell Geroge had been. He blinked and simply finished with, "but what's the big deal? People hated you and you're just a douche again in this life. I had some mental issues later and life but you don't see me being a douche now."Jackson stormed forward and grabbed George by the front of his red sweatshirt. He was hauled up and George had to stand on his toes to not fall, "Listen here you little shit-" "Ah, ah!" Geroge grinned, despite his view of Jackson's raised fist ready to hit him, "You don't want to get security called, do you?" "I'll take my chances." Ironically, George would think later, he didn't feel the pain of being punched in the face until much later. But, he did feel himself hitting the ground roughly as Jackson dropped him. George looked up as Jackson went to hit him again, but this time, someone else grabbed his arm. Sam had latched himself onto the larger man's arm, tugging him backward from hitting Geroge again. Jackson blinked in shock as seeing the way Sam had wrapped himself around Jackson in his attempts to save his friend. "Don't hurt him!" Sam growled, tugging him back as the crowd of onlookers grew larger, "Stop it!" A backhand sent the smaller man tumbling to the stones below. Sam felt his hands scratch on the rocks and could taste blood in his mouth. George growled and went to stand but then, at that moment, a very loud and authoritative voice cut the commotion. "Jackson!" It was sharp and the man in question snapped to a full military attention, "What the hell is going on here?!" George's head snapped around to see none other than Chase Lee parting the crowd like he was someone of administration, or like Moses, either worked. Chase looked pissed. There was no way to explain it other than that. Except, George noticed the way he seemed to hold himself like a different person. More straight, more confident, older. It was a military hold. And George realized what had happened."Oh, it's just you." Jackson relaxed but all the onlookers were staring at the spectacle like they knew it was a horrible decision to think Lee couldn't do anything. "I thought it was someone important.""Ah, so you think you're important just because you were a general? A hero in a bullshit war?" Chase stalked forwards and the crowd was beginning to cheer for Chase to go ahead and let him have it, "Well, newsflash. You're not the only Major General here." "And who were you?" "Charles Lee," Chase growled and he stalked forward until he was face to face with Jackson, teeth bared as if he was expecting a fight, "and by seniority," the crowd had practically lunged forward to hear what he said next, "that makes you my bitch." And everyone went wild. Jackson growled out a mouthful of swears as he took a step back in disgust. He went to say a few words, but it was too late. He had lost this encounter. George stood, feeling the now tender part of his jaw with his fingers and frowning once he realized that he'd bruise. Jackson had backed up to the edge of the circle as Chase helped Sam to his feet and George blinked when he saw the blood dripping from a cut lip. "Clear the field!" Someone shouted from the back, "Clear the field! Washington is coming!" And they all ran. Peggy had nearly tackled them, jumping on Lafayette's back as they screamed about a new addition to the reincarnate list. Lafayette bent forward to allow Peggy to stay on their back but their eyes followed the yellow case of their phone. "Look!" Peggy screeched, "Look! Look! We have someone new!" "Hold still, hold still!" Lafayette laughed as their eyes read the names visible from where the screen allowed, they blinked when they saw the addition, "Wait, oh my god. No way! Charles Lee of all people remembers?!" "I knew you'd freak out!" Peggy flailed as their legs wrapped around Lafayette's waist to keep their balance and position, "Come on, we have to go tell everyone it's official!""You're not getting off, are you?" "No," Peggy replied off, holding their arm out like they were holding a sword, "Onward, noble steed. To Washington!" "I always seem to get there too late!" Washington groaned as he flopped back in his desk chair, Maria and Eliza laughing at his annoyed expression, "All I want is to keep this campus safe from infighting!" "No," Eliza grinned, "you just want to shove yourself between two fighters to assert dominance like you did when Thomas and Alexander would, um, throw hands during a cabinet meeting?"Maria laughed and Washington just groaned into his hands. Maria tucked a piece of her hair behind her ear and finally said, "From what someone was saying when we got there it was Jackson was antagonizing some people and he hit them. Apparently, it got broken up by a new reincarnate.""Really?" Eliza asked, frowning as she tried to recall the list. She hadn't looked at in almost two weeks, so anyone could be on it now, "Did they say who?" "Couldn't catch it," Maria sighed, shrugging, "Sorry." Eliza went to say something else but then the door slammed open to reveal a sweating Lafayette with a smiling Peggy on their back. Peggy jumped down and squealed, "Have you guys seen who the new reincarnate is?! We know him!"Washington raised an eyebrow as Maria and Eliza shared a look. Eliza blinked, "Who is it?" "Chase Lee!" Peggy shouted, throwing their yellow phone at Eliza, "Is Charles Lee!" Eliza's "Dear God,", Maria's "Who the hell is that?" and Washington's groan echoed into the office space at the same time as Lafayette and Peggy shared smiles. Lin snapped up from his bunk the second the door slammed open to reveal a very haggard looking George, a bleeding Sam, and a very pissed off looking Chase. Lin blinked and jumped down from his bed, going towards the three, "What the hell happened?" "Jackson." The three said in varying tones of annoyance, anger, and pain. He buried the rage that burned in his chest as he forced the two injured ones to sit on George's bed. He blinked, grabbing the stashed first aid kit he kept for emergencies. He turned back to Chase and blinked, "What happened?!" "Well," Chase frowned, scratching at his dark hair, "I can't really answer the beginning part...and what I can won't make sense until you know."George frowned and sighed, "Jackson called me out for being King George the Third and I confirmed what he said but then I said some stuff back. Then, he punched me in the face.""What?!""And then Sam tried to stop him, so Jackson hit him too."Lin growled out, "That dick," as he knelt down in front of Sam, holding Sam's face with his free hand as he wiped away the stray blood. Sam went beet red but then he just laughed a bit, "I didn't think he'd actually hit me.""He'll do anything just to look tough." Lin said to them and they nodded in agreement, "Anyway, Chase, what happened with you?""Well, I came in, told him about my new status as a reincarnate, and he backed up."Lin paused and turned to face him, Sam's face still in his hands. "Wait...what?"Chase smiled, "I kind of...woke up yesterday. That's why I didn't come back here. I was getting certified in town and just slept there. It's weird...and sudden and I just know so much more now.""Who were you?""Charles Lee."Lin blinked at the name and his brow furrowed as if he remembered something about it. The expression was gone as soon as it had come. "Do you want us to call you Charles or Chase?""Charles...if you don't mind.""Never would." Lin smiled, "Well, Charles, would you go take George to get some ice? He'll be black and blue tomorrow for sure and maybe we can stop some of the inevitable bitching."They ignored George's outraged "Hey!" and they all laughed instead.
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
Angelica sighed as she watched the video of the fight on Hercules' phone. She shook her head and threaded her needle, "Honestly, it's like Jackson is trying to get himself expelled or something. If administration hears about that then he's going to get kicked out. This is an Ivy, they don't want any bad publicity."Hercules nodded, pocketing his phone as he looked down at the sweater he was knitting, "King and Seabury haven't come forward and no one is dumb enough to show administration the video. Jackson gets no punishment so he can just do it again.""His roommate is Ronald James.""And?"She looked up from her needlework, a smile playing on her lips, "A little birdie told me that he's James Reynolds."He looked up, frowning as his skin practically crawled with the name. It wasn't right, he remembered the name. He hated the name and the man. He gritted his teeth as he remembered:
"Alexander," Hercules called as he stepped inside his friend's home, eyes wide as he realized the absence of people and noise. He swallowed, this household was never supposed to be quiet, but, considering the pamphlet crushed between his calloused fingers, he wouldn't blame it. "Alexander!"
A noise from the drawing room perked Hercules' interest as he turned to face an utterly haggard looking Alexander. He frowned. Alexander blinked in shock at the sight of his old friend and simply frowned, "Hercules? What are you doing here?"
"Is it true?" Hercules held up the crumpled pamphlet as he continued, "Is it true?!" Alexander was silent and for once, to Hercules, it was enough, "How could you do this to Eliza?"
"Herc-"
"No, Alexander," Hercules snarled, "How could you do this? You were the best of us."
"I just..." Alexander seemed at a loss for words before he hung his head and just let his shoulders sag, "I was lonely...and so was she."
"Alexander-"
"They're gone," Alexander whispered, "Eliza left and took the children with her. And I'm here. I've lost everything...and I can't fix it."
Hercules frowned. He had been expecting Alexander to defend his actions in some way that would have let him get the slip. He remembered the false charge of embezzling being whispered through various political circles, but Hercules knew his friend to be a good man. No one else believed in Hamilton like Hercules did.
"Either option would have destroyed us," Alexander choked out and Hercules stepped forward, "Eliza can't be a poor man's wife...my children can't starve. They're too good for any suffering and I've caused too much of the thing they don't need."
And Hercules hugged him tight. He felt the moment Alexander tensed and then the next moment where he relaxed into shakes and sobbing. Hercules could never defend infidelity, but that didn't mean his friend didn't need a shoulder to lean on.
"It's going to be okay, Alexander," Hercules promised, never letting go, "It's going to take some time, but it can only go up."
Alexander only sobbed in return.
"John would have been proud that you tried to save your family."
And Alexander broke right there.
Hercules blinked from the memory with a frown before looking up at Angelica, "What do you need me to do?" "Thomas" Burr growled as he followed the former president, "what does this kid have? And why are you dragging me of all people along?""Trust me," Thomas replied, following Philip across the quad before pausing outside a large dorm building that Thomas had never entered, "it's important to both of us."Philip threw open the door and instead of going for the stairs or even the dorm rooms, he went for the community space dominated by couches instead of people. Burr blinked, "Um...kid, who exactly are you?""Philip Hamilton." The boy spoke like Burr should have known, like the information wasn't life-shattering and or altering, "And I have two people you two need to see."Burr went to question it but then there was a simple moment where a woman shouted, "Pip! There you are! Pat and I have been waiting forever!"Burr paused. He knew that voice. He remembered that voice. He remembered the last time that voice had spoken to him. And he practically lunged forward to see the woman.The two women waiting for Philip were seated on one of the couches, the smaller dark skinned one had her legs strewn over the lap of a woman with a long skirt, long sleeves, and a violet hijab wrapped around her head. Burr blinked as he approached them, he felt numb and could vaguely hear a buzzing."Theo?" He whispered, tears gathering in his eyes as the dark skinned girl removed her legs from the other girl and stood, "Oh my god, is it really you?""Hey, Dad," Theodosia the second laughed. They didn't get the chance to say anything else because both had flung themselves into a hug.Burr was shaking, hands wrapped around his daughter as if she would slip through his fingers again. He remembered waiting on the docks for her ship to return, he remembers simply standing and returning home when he realized she wouldn't be. Theo was crying and laughing at the same time. The two pulled apart just in time to see Thomas shake his daughter's hand at Patsy's own asking."You're really here." Thomas laughed. Philip had perched himself on the arm of the couch with a small grin, "Why did it take you so long to find us?"Theo looked at Patsy with her face flushed while Philip laughed awkwardly. Patsy rolled her eyes and decided to explain, "Well, we were working out our own relationship details."Burr caught it faster than Thomas did, but when the former president saw the joined hands of the three he smiled."Congratulations." Thomas and Burr said at the same time, but Thomas was the only one who continued, "But, Philip, you do realize that you get to have the Dad Talk from both of us now, right?""Oh shit." "I can't believe it," Eliza said to herself, staring at the Reincarnate List on her phone, "King George is actually on here."She had seen the news this morning. The world had been going crazy at the fact that the American Founding Fathers were finally returning, but now more figures from the eighteenth century as well? It was amazing for some, interesting to most, while the rest didn't give a damn. Eliza was just happy that the school kept all of the news media outlets out. It'd be hell otherwise.She closed the internet on her phone and slipped the phone into her bag but, she stopped instead of going forwards. She turned towards the storage closet beside her. The building was done with classes for the day, but someone was in the supply closet.And they were crying.Eliza had babysat enough children in this life and raised enough children in her past one to know what the difference between fear and pain sobbing sounded like.This sobbing, on the other hand, was some horrific mix of both.And she wasn't going to let that continue.She marched over to the wood door and opened it slowly, not wanting to scare the occupant. The occupant had their hands clasped at the sides of their face and fingers pressing into their hair, while their body remained hunched over in a ball as if to protect themselves from being hurt further. Her eyes widened in shock when she saw who it was."Oh my god," Eliza said to herself as she knelt down in front of the sobbing figure. She placed her hands on their shoulders before saying anything, "Lin, what's wrong?"Lin looked up, face flushed and tears dripping down his face. Eliza blinked and couldn't help but think of her husband at that very moment. He made the same horrified expression when she had caught him crying in his office, sobbing as he was trapped in some horrible and war-torn memory, all caused by accidentally cutting himself on a letter opener. Eliza frowned and blinked herself free."Eliza?""Lin, tell me what's wrong.""I have a headache." He sobbed out, "And...and...I remember the island."He dissolved into pained sobs as Eliza held him to her chest. She was silent with her own horror. This wasn't how remembering went. Something was wrong and Lin was suffering for it. "What did you need me here for?" Sam asked as he took his seat in the cafe across from James Madison, "I got your text. You said it was an emergency? I don't see any of your other asshat friends with you, so, is something wrong?"Madison let out a sigh, waving over the barista as she called out his name. Once his tea was placed in front of him, he simply said, "I think I've figured out what's wrong with Lin, well Alexander's, remembering.""And why would you tell me?""You're one of the closest people to him," Madison purred, refraining from adding Because you're the only one of them who hasn't realized who you were, but continuing on normally, "and you're going to have to be aware of what's happening to him."Sam frowned, "What do you mean?"He slid Sam his phone with the newest group chat messages on the screen.Ang(hel)lica: Lin's been getting worseYellowSunshineChild: No shit sherlockRootyTootyPointNShooty: Peggy this is seriousYellowSunshineChild: an opinion?!MacaroniHo: that no one is getting shot for?!?!?! Eliiiiza: play nice all of youEliiiiza: but Ang is right. Lin is getting worse.Tur(n)tles: Lin! Protection! Squad!ActualBaguette: John...we aren't friends with himherCULES MULLIGAN: And king boi would probably kill us.Tur(n)tles: true trueSam blinked as he finished reading the messages. "Well, what does this have to do with me?""Well," Madison started, but then he shut his mouth as if he didn't like what he was planning on saying, but after a few moments he finally decided. "as I said before, you're one of the closest people to him and he's going to reach out. As much as you think of us as, well, asshats, we do care about him.""Why? You helped ruin his life."And Madison said nothing. "Are you sure?" Washington asked with eyebrows raised as he glanced down at Maria. He didn't stop his walk through the campus though, he did have somewhere to be, "I haven't heard of a situation like that before."Maria shook her head with a sigh, "James texted it to me after he finished talking to Sam. And honestly, it makes sense to why Link isn't remembering like he should be.""So, you're insinuating that since Alexander should have died multiple times in his past life, Lin can only remember parts at a time?" Washington blinked and when Maria nodded, he let out a sigh, "Well, I guess it makes sense. At this rate, any of us would have realized. Especially with so many other reincarnates from around his lifetime. He should have realized by now.""What should we do about this?" Maria glanced up at the Professor before glancing forward at the nearing quad, "Some people are starting to get suspicious about our groups' interest in Lin. And that can't end well if some people realize who he was before he does. Remember Lincoln?"Who didn't? He had been reincarnated in the sixties, but he had been murdered by a mob of anti-segregation Southerners before he even had the chance to remember. Washington swallowed and shook his head, "You're right. I'll...think of something. I think I know someone who should be able to help us.""Who?" "George!" A woman called from the quad and Maria looked over to see a woman in a blue suit waving them over. Her mass of curly dark hair was cropped short and as they neared her she called out, "Mi alma, why do you never show up on time? I've been cat called too many times."Washington looked thunderous but the woman only laughed. She stepped up and Maria blinked in shock as she had to look down at the woman. She laughed, "I think they were all horrified when I called them out for it. Angry Spanish yelling seemed to do the trick.""I don't deserve you.""You're entirely right." She smiled, reaching towards his tie and pulling him down to her level to kiss him on the nose. "Oh, is this...Maria Reynolds?" Maria smiled and the woman smiled back once she had released Washington. "Yes, yes it is ma'am.""Oh, don't call me that," the woman laughed, she handed her messenger bag to Washington to hold as spoke, "call me Martha." Peggy hadn't snuck away from the party empty handed. They laughed to themselves, escaping down the hallway with a large bottle of tequila hidden under their yellow coat. They continued on, dodging past drunk people and couples quickly nearing third base. They entered the far and mostly empty stairwell with a grin. A swig of the alcohol later and they were on their way, except, there were other voices.And they were familiar."What did you want to show me, Reynolds?" Jackson huffed, Peggy tried not to laugh at the slight slur to his words, "I'm trying to enjoy the party before security shows up.""Shh," one voice of Ronald James piped up and Peggy blinked. He remembered. Oh dear. They had to tell Maria and quickly, but they couldn't leave the stairwell silently, not without warning the other two below, so they decided to listen, "you know that Lin kid?" There was a pause and Peggy could tell there was already a nod, "Well, I think I have an idea on how to make sure he stops being a bother."Jackson let out a loud sigh before he finally said, "He'd be like a message to those other freshmen that think they're all high and mighty. What's your plan?" "So, when I saw your fight with King and his pet, I saw he wasn't there," Reynolds said lowly, Peggy practically had to stretch over the railing to hear them, but that didn't matter to them as long as they weren't spotted, "so I figured maybe I could pull in a favor with some of the guys and they could...rough him up a bit.""You really don't like him do you?" "He's Alexander Hamilton," Reynolds practically spat, "I want to make him pay.""Sound reasonable," Jackson replied with a shrug.Reynolds laughed "and if that doesn't work, then we can always go for a more threatening approach."There was a small shuffling noise and Jackson suddenly shouted in horror, "What the hell, are you crazy?"Jackson wasn't hiding his alarm at something so Peggy leaned forward further to see what Reynolds was doing. They blinked in shock once they saw what Reynolds was doing. They swallowed and stared wide eyed at the gun in Reynolds' hand. Reynolds said something but they didn't hear it over the sound of their heart pounding in their ears. Jackson seemed to be horrified as well, but he glanced upwards.And for a split second, the two made wide-eyed eye contact. Peggy ran and he followed. There was another set of footsteps getting further away and it didn't take a genius to realize that Reynolds ran away. Peggy managed to make it up the next flight to the door they had come through, but Jackson had longer legs. He slammed turned them around and slammed them bodily into the wall. He was pale and shaking, but his grip on their arms was tight and painful. Peggy couldn't get away. "I didn't know he had that," Jackson whispered frantically, "I swear I didn't. I don't want him dead. I swear."Peggy blinked and said nothing, but that seemed to send him over the edge into some horrible mix of panic and hysteria. He slammed them into the wall again and practically shouted, "Promise me, you won't say a word to anyone. I didn't know. I don't want him dead. Please!"He went to do it again but Peggy drove a knee into his groin and shoved him away with an annoyed hiss. He looked up from his position on the floor and Peggy practically spat, "I know you didn't. I'm not stupid. He's crazy and either you tell security or I will." Jackson blinked in shock, "Am I understood? You can hate Lin all you want but the second you threaten his life is when you've gone too far."Jackson went to get up but Peggy stood their ground, "And if you ever touch me like that again, I will not hesitate to kick your ass. Am I understood?"He nodded and Peggy simply left. But, the second they were out of eyesight they sprinted to the nearest restroom and vomited until they could stop shaking with fear. "My lovely darlings," Mrs. King cried as she embraced her sons, she kissed both of them on their foreheads before laughing, "how is college? I hope Columbia is treating you well! I expect only the best out of my alma mater!" "We're just great, mom," George laughed, but the second he was free his father practically picked him up in his bear hug, "dad, you're strangling me!"Mr. King laughed and set George down before doing the same thing to Lin, "Am I not allowed to hug my sons? I haven't seen you in forever! Travelling Europe doesn't exactly give you the best way to see your kids."Lin laughed when his dad put him down. "How's business? Isn't that why you guys had to go?""Of course," Mrs. King replied, "can't have some bad deals ruining my company now can we?" "Never." George finished. Mrs. King turned around and leveled her eyes on her son and frowned, "Now tell me, Georgie, why did you neglect to tell us you were a reincarnate?" George didn't answer but Lin only laughed awkwardly, "I guess he didn't want to be British royalty? I mean it must be hell on your private life."The two parents looked at their adopted son and laughed. Mr. King clapped George on the shoulder and grinned, "Well, you see that makes a lot of sense, then. I mean the last thing we need is news cameras everywhere, but hey, at least you have a dual citizenship now!""Great, just what I wanted.""Well," Lin grinned, "at least I'm not the reincarnate. That would be awful, can you imagine? Two lives in your head at once!"Well, George thought, if you only knew.
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
Eliza was crying and Philip was flailing in his attempts to escape strangulation via his mother's hug. She held him close, sobbing into his mass of curly hair and over the sounds of her sobs, Patsy and Theo were laughing at their boyfriend. Philip tried to pry himself away but only resulted in Angelica flinging herself at the two and initiating a group hug. Patsy and Theo only continued their laughing."If he dies," Patsy smiled as she glanced at her girlfriend, cheeks flushed in laughter, "then it appears our trio is down to two.""Oh."Philip managed a muffled yell of, "Don't you dare sing Disney songs without me!"Thomas just shook his head and ran a hand through his mass of curls. Patsy smiled at her father, she didn't have to look up. She was easily six feet tall without any aid of heels, while Theo stood small at five feet. Thomas frowned, "But really, Patsy. A Hamilton? I can respect a Burr, but the idea of my own flesh and blood...being with a Hamilton is," he shuddered, "abhorrent.""Oh please," Theo cut in, eyebrows raised with mischief, "I heard many things about you from my father, and trust me. If any two out of that government was going to start having hate sex, then it would be you two.""Excuse-""I could see it." Eliza laughed, finally releasing her son as she wiped at her tears, "Now that I think of it, I could definitely see it." She glanced over to Maria, "I'd love to have seen that pamphlet."Maria laughed, "It would still read like a Dear Penthouse Letter." Her voice dropped into something akin to Alexander's, the accent being minced but it got the point across, "Dear America, I never thought this would happen to me."Angelica broke off howling with laughter while Thomas felt his cheeks heat up in return, "I hate all of you." John furrowed his brow as he watched the debate end. Lin and Lafayette winning yet again and knocking out their competition. They had taken the first place spot for their For argument on the American Financial System and soon enough would battle out the best Against argument first debate of the year. John narrowed his eyes when he saw Jackson approach Lin, who was gathering his own papers. Jackson said something, but thanks to the stunned silence of the room, John heard it just fine."Nice debate, Lin," Jackson said simply."If you're picking a fight Jackson," Lin replied, not bothering to look at Jackson, "then I'm not biting.""I'm not." The former President said, he shifted his weight from foot to foot as Lin turned around, "I just wanted...to apologize." Lin raised an eyebrow but Jackson only continued, surprisingly tense yet shaky, "For being an ass. Like...I had no right.""You really don't do this, do you?" Lin questioned, voice sharp and John blinked. It sounded exactly like how Alexander had talked to Charles Lee before and after Monmouth. John blinked again, clearing the thought from his head, "Or are you just doing this because you have an audience?"Jackson frowned and looked down at his shoes, "No...no...It just came to my attention recently that...life's too short to be a dick to you."Lin blinked and seemed to weigh his options for a moment. Then he simply held out a hand. Jackson blinked at it before shaking it. But, there was a small moment of peace before Lin just smiled, something dark and sharp and John was definitely reminded of Alexander smiling as he charged into battle. Lin spoke slowly but loud enough for everyone to hear, "I'm a forgiving person, but I'm not forgiving you. So, I'm going to say this once, this is your last chance. Ruin it and I'll deal with you."He tore himself free from Jackson's hand and simply walked out of the room to nothing but stunned silence.Lafayette glanced back at John, eyes wide and John couldn't do anything but stare in shock. Aaron Burr has always sorted his days into good days, bad days, and other. He's done it since his first life. And continued the habit well into his second, third, seventh, tenth. He was at the point where any one would lose track, but he never did. He organized the lives and he remembered all of them. Regrettably. His Good Days were mostly like this: Having best friends (first (kind of), second, seventh, eighth, ninth, and eleventh). Getting married (the only thing with every life, though the reasons were sparse and rarely for love). Having children (first, second, fourth, sixth, tenth, eleventh). The good things tended to stop there. After all, Aaron Burr didn't get happy endings. He was sure of that after his second life ended in a house fire where his entire family including himself died in. He remembered that memory clearly. Again, regrettably. His Bad Days were mostly everything his Good Days were not. But there was always something there. He had seen every war since his first death. Every American spat. Every American war he had fought in, well mostly died in, but still. He was there for the Civil War, Spanish-American, Mexican-American, both of the World Wars, Korea, Vietnam. He remembered all of them. He hated himself for it. Everything he had done. But, his Other category only held one thing. And it always seemed to bite him in the ass in every life. Other Days: Alexander Hamilton. His first clear memory in every life seemed to be always-They're counting and he's going to die. Alexander is going to shoot and Theodosia will be an orphan. He's going to shoot. I'm going to die. Oh my god, no, no. I can't do this. This is wrong. These were dumb and immature. What happened to us?! Alexander, please, oh my god Please! It was already too late by then, he'd reached his end pace and shot. And Alexander stared at him with wide eyes and gun in the air. He went to say something, anything, but he only coughed out a small amount of blood before crumpling-dueling Alexander.He remembered that best of all. But, that wasn't even the icing on the cake. He had fallen for the stupid man, the idiot who wrote too much and couldn't shut up. He had fallen for the man who didn't think with his head, but with his heart. He had fallen for the man who tore Aaron apart. Every life he had traveled to find him when he could (being a slave in his second life didn't allow such liberty). To apologize. To do something. But Alexander had never appeared. He had never shown up, written himself into existence. Never. But now, on Aaron Burr's twelfth life, Alexander had come back. In the form of a bipolar and fidgety man by the name of Lin. It was laughable because he had fallen for Lin as well. He never got closer, but god did he want to. He wanted to be with Lin because he was Lin, but then again his love for Alexander had never stopped. It was like holding onto two intertwined live wires and never letting go. Aaron Burr was in love with both of them. And he couldn't help but remind himself of it when he saw the way Lin was on his knees, shaking his own body where it had crumpled in the music building hallway. Lin was yelling something at him, dark hair loose and framing his face as his dark eyes betrayed nothing but terror. Aaron blinked and sat up, despite Lin's protests. "What the fuck happened?!" Lin shouted the second Aaron blinked at him. Lin's hands were shaking and he sounded truly scared, "Aaron, please, what happened?" "I-I...guess I had a flashback." He said simply. It was true. He wasn't sure what had triggered it, but he was pretty sure it was a shout of some color and then a slam of door that sounded too much like a gunshot and then he was back in Vietnam. Aaron blinked himself away from that specific undertow and looked at Lin again, "Happens sometimes.""Like that?" Lin said, sitting back on his folded legs. He sounded breathless but continued to ramble. "Jesus. Like...I can't imagine. Jesus."Why? Aaron wanted to scream. Why couldn't Alexander just remember? Why did fate have to do this to him? Alexander was so close but Lin was closer. Aaron wanted both and couldn't have either. He'd have to destroy one to have the other. It wouldn't be fair. And for some reason, that filled him with rage. At what? He really couldn't tell. But he was angry. And oddly enough, Aaron Burr may have always been cool-headed all around in all of his lives, but when he got truly angry, he'd lash out. His duel with Alexander was enough to prove that. But it was the same in every life. And that's what he found himself doing now. As he clambered to his feet and yelling at Lin. Aaron couldn't catch his own words or stop, but he just continued to vent off his frustration, his anger, his guilt, his shame. And every damn emotion he hadn't shown because he had always been so afraid of doing what he did to Alexander to someone else. Lin just seemed to shrink back. Eyes widening as Aaron yelled. "-You don't understand. You will never understand because you know what?!" Aaron continued on, "You never remember. You can't wake up. You've let everything go to hell, Alexander, because you were so stupid to accept. You never thought of someone else. You-you ruined me!" "Aaron-""Shut the hell up, you can't say anything. Stop trying. Stop trying to contribute. Stop being you. Just please...remember." Aaron's shoulder dropped the second that last word left him and the realization hit him instantly. Lin just stared at him. Dark eyes wide and mouth moving as if he wanted to say something but couldn't. Then Aaron saw the building tears in his eyes and before Aaron could do anything, Lin turned and fled.
"Lin has a crush on you," John had teased, drunk off his ass as he poked Aaron in the ribs. Peggy had snuck off with a bottle of alcohol and it was now the two of them at this part, "I can see it. He is always giggly and blushing."
"I doubt it."
"I can see it."
"How?"
"That was how I was around Alexander." John sighed, finishing off his drink, "Make him happy, Aaron. Make him happy."
And Aaron's worst fear came true.Honestly, with a number of parties going on lately, Thomas would exist solely as a hangover or a drunk. No in between, a hellish existence that could never be explained. He could feel the heat of the morning sun glowing gold through his window. He glanced over at the bunk in the room where James and Aaron slept. They weren't there. Neither had gone to the party last night, so Thomas really didn't know where they were. And, piece by piece, Thomas realized some things about his surroundings. First, his clothes were scattered on the floor. Second, from what he could see of his chest, he saw an utterly embarrassing amount of hickeys and bite marks that continued to go down past the sheet. He swallowed as he turned to see number three. His cheeks were heating up and Thomas was praying it was someone who wouldn't be out for blood when they woke up. From what he remembered-hands on his chest and a mouth at his neck, cloth against cloth as they grinded for friction, there was a smell of alcohol and the feeling of dried tears-Thomas realized it had been a drunk hook up.And finally, Lin was in his bed. Had Thomas been not hungover and more aware, he would have fallen out of bed with a shout of alarm. Someone was going to kill him! But, since a hangover was currently plaguing his body, he just stared, eyes wide and mouth open, much resembling a fish out of the water. Lin moved in his sleep, his dark hair soft against Thomas' side and he draped an arm against Thomas' chest. The Virginian didn't blush, he just smiled softly. There was a small voice in his head screaming at him to wake him up or leave, just get out of bed. But, Thomas shoved it down. He couldn't help it. Lin's eyes fluttered for a moment and Thomas thought he was going to wake up. But, he didn't. And for the first time in all of his lifetimes, Thomas Jefferson didn't pull away. He just smiled down at Lin, not because this was Alexander Hamilton, but because this was Lin. And the way his heart seemed to flutter in his chest was more than enough to tell him he was utterly screwed.Washington sat across from Peggy, a hand running absentmindedly across his jaw as he stared at them. His wife was next to him, staring at the student in horror. Peggy looked at the hands, trembling slightly as they took in the information. Peggy gathered themself and finally whispered, "Security didn't find anything?" "I'm afraid not," Washington said slowly, "security turned James' dorm and car upside down and didn't find anything. Are you sure you saw him with a gun? I'm not belittling you, I believe you Peggy, but are you sure? You had been drinking when you called me." "Mr. Washington," Peggy started, stopped, then started again before they finally realized what they wanted to say, "I'm sure. Jackson could tell you if he wasn't scared shitless. We both saw the gun and Reynolds-sorry, Ronald James wanted to kill Lin. Please, believe me." "I do." Both turned to see Martha Washington stand from her perch on her husband's desk, "I've worked cases with less evidence than that and won. We could nail him, but the problem is that he knows that security is watching him. He's going to be careful from now on, so, we need to keep this to ourselves. If someone found out, they could have this campus under martial law. And trust me, we don't need panic at all. We just have to catch him when he's not being careful." "And without Jackson on his side..." Washington said to no one."That makes him even more dangerous," Peggy finished. Madison knows something is off the second he goes into the dorm. He sees it in the way Aaron is lying on his bottom bunk, facing the wall and not talking. He's curled around himself and Madison knows guilt when he sees it. Thomas, on the other hand, is lounging on his bed, which is draped in new blankets. Madison sighed and shut the door, drops his back and frowned. He crossed his arms and let out an annoyed sigh."What the hell did you two do?" Neither of them says anything. Aaron doesn't look at him and Madison's frown only gets deeper. Aaron has always looked at him, no matter what life they were living, when he asks a question. Thomas, on the other hand, looks at him instantly. Thomas has never done that without a warrant (warrant usually being he screwed up in such a way that there is no going back. Ie: resigning from Washington's cabinet). He has never had to. They've always been on such a similar level that they had acted together. "Jesus Christ," Madison swore, "I'm going to go gray before I'm even twenty. So, one of you, tell me what the hell you did." Neither spoke. Madison rolled his eyes and growled out a pretty long string of curses. He turned on his heels and simply said, "Well, I'm going to find out what both of you dumbasses did, then I'm going to fix it." And he left.He came back once, for his umbrella, and then left again. Lin couldn't keep doing this. He couldn't keep running from his problem. He had crushed on Burr hard, gotten that thrown in his face, drank to the point he was blacked out way before Max Robes' party even started, jumped into bed with Thomas Jefferson, and was now, standing alone in the rain. He must look like a picture, soaked to the bone and standing alone in a stone courtyard while the rain pours down in silver sheets around him. He ran a hand through his hair, slicking it back into his head before he glanced skyward. Cold rain splashed against his face and he inhaled despite it. It seemed like it was going to rain forever. But, that didn't matter. He had survived worse and could survive this too. He just had to wait out his problems and eventually, they should be able to resolve themselves. But, there was still the nagging voice in his head that practically screamed "Write yourself out. Don't wait for it. You'll throw away your shot." but it was drowned out in the hurricane of his own thoughts.He didn't hear someone shouting his name the first time. He looked down from the sky when his name was shouted the third time. The rain pouring down from overhead was cut off suddenly as a large umbrella covered him. Sam looked at him with worry, brows arched in something akin to fear as he shouted over the rain and clap of thunder, "Lin?! Where have you been? We couldn't find you. You missed classes today and George was freaking out."Lin blinked and felt warming rainwater drip from his lashes and fall down his cheeks. He couldn't tell if he had stopped crying yet. "I was around.""That doesn't answer the question," Sam sighed, but he paused, sniffing once and frowning, "you smell like alcohol." "Hangover." "What happened?" "Got ripped into by Aaron Burr and was told to stop trying. I thought he was a good guy, you know? Thought I liked him, too...guess it was wasted." Lin laughed, but it was a sad and wet thing. Sam frowned, but Lin only sighed, "I guess I'm kind of sad." Sam took a hand off his umbrella handle and grabbed Lin's, "Well, I guess we're all kind of sad."Lin smiled at that. Remembering how Sam had been kicked out of his home for being gay and how he didn't need them anymore. He was going to rise above them. Lin couldn't stop his smile from getting wider. If Sam could rise above that, then Lin could rise above something as stupid as a crush and an odd connection to Aaron Burr. "Yeah," Lin agreed, "though, I think I have an odd idea on how to stop being sad. Just for a little bit." "And what is that?" "Kiss me in the rain." "Is this The Notebook?" "It can be," Lin laughed, cupping Sam's face in his hands as thunder clapped overhead. He stared at Sam's wide eyes and widening pupils. And for once he could ignore how he thought about how the gray sky should be yellow, "just kiss me." And Sam did. The umbrella dropped and the rain poured down in something akin to a baptism. They never noticed the way James Madison passed by, staring in shock as the pieces came together. He sighed and walked away, deciding that Lin La Vega and Samuel Shepherd could be happy before Alexander Hamilton and Samuel Seabury tore them apart.
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
All in all, the act of human reincarnation has been around since the don of the species Homo Sapien. Though, the act hadn't been accepted publically and scientifically until the early 1920's, the earliest of human cave paintings depict it. The science and reasoning behind the ability, through many decades of careful study, has come down on the basis of similar DNA and similar brain structures being recreated and passed down through various genetic chains. The most recent 2016 study through Stanford University studied many certified reincarnates. Many of the forty-seven test subjects were well-known American Historical figures such as George Washington (who chose to leave their personal name and information out of the public study) and Harriet Tubman (Miriam Johnson). The study left the conclusion that all of the studied reincarnates had family genetic ties through DNA matches and that their DNA was similar to the bodies from their past lives. (Note: George Washington's Reincarnate family tie was not through President Washington, seeing as the man had no children from his person. The tie was from his sister Betty Washington-Lewis.)
More recently, brain scans have detailed closer understandings on how the phenomenon occurs. The Reincarnated John F. Kennedy (Dr. Cynthia Kennedy-Brighton) revealed through a brain scan that her neurophysiology was an exact match to that of John F. Kennedy's brain scan on September 17th, 1963, a mere two months before he died. More studies are being completed through John Hopkins University and Stanford University to form a hypothesis on the effects of multiple lifetimes on a reincarnated brain. The John F. Kennedy scan showed no brain damage or decay from the bullet that killed him even though the Reincarnate has experienced a lifetime struggle with migraines. There is a debate on whether is a chemical imbalance caused by a change in human instinct due to a crisis or the memory of the previous death. Studies-
And Angelica closed the textbook with a sigh. She shook her head, she really loved science. She really did, but there were only so many reports a woman could read on reincarnation before she wanted to tear her out. She was questioning herself on why she wanted to major in Reincarnation Science, but she wanted answers. She had read up on trauma and the effects of it on reincarnation, but there wasn't enough in any study to give her a direct answer on what was wrong with Lin."I have nothing," She sighed, looking up from the textbook cover (really, why the hell is there a smiling child on it if the only thing that textbook brought on was suffering?) and into the eyes of one Philip Hamilton, "we've been reading for hours. How do we not have anything yet? We've gone through all the studies and there's nothing! How can there be nothing?""Because" Philip began, his eyes sparkling, "the reincarnated population of the world serves to be only 3% of the current total living population." Angelica broke off laughing at his impression of John Adams. Honestly, despite that man being a college-level science teacher who got washed up after people realized who he was, he was still just as much of an asshole as he was back then. Philip let out a sigh a moment later, "Besides, we talked to Harriet Tubman and she says she still has a small seizure disorder from her past life. But, apparently, it's better compared to the life she had after being Harriet Tubman and before being herself.""How does she feel about being put on the twenty dollar bill?""She loves it.""I'm still loving how she scored us a special conversation with her despite her being mayor," Angelica leaned back in her chair with a sigh and ran a hand through her mass of dark curls, "Anyway, what's your hypothesis?""Well, don't you think its weird how so many of us from our era are being reincarnated at the same time?" Angelica nodded at the question and Philip continued, "I think it's because so many of us were birthed in the same time. Between our whole group, there are only eleventh months between all of us. There are a few outliers, but like we're all college freshman.""Makes sense.""I still don't know about Dad, though," Philip confessed, running a hand over his freckled face, "he should have remembered by now. I don't know if it's a mental block, but Mom said he said something about remembering the island."Angelica frowned, "From what Madison was saying, he's probably remembering in spurts that go with the periods where he escaped death. So, if I know correctly, he only almost died a few times. There was the time he was sick when he was little-""And Grandma died then.""then the hurricane," Angelica was counting off on her fingers, "there was that mess at Schuylkill River, and maybe a few others?""So, from what you're saying, Lin only remembers up until he was twelve? And then he'll remember up until he's seventeen, then twenty-two and then the rest of his life? Seems a bit...uneven."Angelica gave a small laugh, "But this is all just speculation anyway. We can't know for sure." "They're cute," Hercules sighed, finishing his coffee as he stared at Lin and Sam, who were busying themselves holding hands across the table and talking. Madison nodded in agreement, "like in the too-sugary kind of way, but not gonna lie, I had my bets on them getting together."Madison raised an eyebrow but shook his head with a sigh, "I just find it...ironic that my roommates are still acting weird as hell while those two just got together. Not to mention, Thomas wouldn't tell me what happened to him the night before.""And?""He tells me everything," Madison frowned, "he always has, but when I found a shirt in our room that wasn't any of ours, he wouldn't give me a direct answer on whose it was."Hercules raised an eyebrow, "What's the big deal? It's just a shirt. People's laundry gets mixed up all the time.""I saw Lin wearing that shirt the night of Max Robes' party.""Oh."There was a moment of silence between them and Hercules just shook his head, "Damn, that's rough as hell. Let me guess, Thomas went all weird the second you asked if it was Lin's?"Madison nodded. "Yep. So, as far as I know, Thomas had a drunk hookup with Lin, the latter of who proceeded to start dating his roommate the following day, all while Aaron hasn't said a thing since before the party.""You think he did something to Lin?" Hercules only continued when he saw Madison nod, eyes sliding over in the direction of a laughing Lin while Sam only kissed his knuckles. He didn't look back for a few moments, "Because we all know Lin doesn't drink.""Yes," Madison confirmed Hercules' suspicions and the tailor only frowned deeper, "I've met Aaron in quite a few of my lives. And trust me, he's been in love with Alexander since he was Aaron Burr.""How could you tell?"
"Well, I'll be, Mr. Madison," James turned around the second he heard the new voice-well, it wasn't exactly new, but he had never heard it before but the tone gave the person away, "hasn't it been a very long time?"
"Yes," James replied, turning towards the figure that was none other than one Aaron Burr, "what brings you here, my good man?"
Burr laughed, staring out into the muddied and battle-torn land that was skewered by the trenches around them. A mortar shell exploded not even one hundred yards away, but the way Madison didn't even flinch was more than enough to tell Burr how long the other man had been there. Burr scrubbed away the flecks of mud from the mortar shell explosion and Madison held in telling him it was useless, he'd find out soon enough.
"I got drafted," Burr yelled over the newest round of gunfire. Madison took note of how he jumped from foot to foot, almost as if he was readying himself to run forward into the gunfire that kept men underground, "How long have you been here, James?"
"I was the first round of men out here from the states," James replied but there was an odd smile on his face as he said, "But, in this life, I'm afraid I have to go by Alexander Smith. An oddity I care not for, I assure you."
Burr just smiled. Madison blinked when he saw the way his eyes got far away when he mentioned this life's first name. His brow furrowed as that smile was wiped clean as a man screamed from up ahead. The sound stopped soon enough, Madison mused it was a bullet wound, "Have you met him here? Have you seen Alexander?"
"I'm afraid not," was the reply, "he hasn't been here. Lucky bastard."
"Are there any others here?"
Madison sat back against the sadly empty food crate and stared up at the standing man. "Adams took a bullet in the head three weeks in, Franklin and Randolph were gassed out about a week ago. Washington was promoted-"
"George Washington is here?"
"Martha was promoted. And I'm the last one of us as a ground soldier, well, until now."
"And Alexander is nowhere to be found," Madison raised an eyebrow at the second mention of Burr's murder victim, but Burr only continued, "I've lived quite a few lives and he hasn't shown up yet."
The Father of the Constitution just shrugged and glanced down at his mud-covered and scratched watch. He let out a small humming noise before finally saying, "I'm due to head up front. You're fine to come with me, you'll be there soon enough. Oh, and by the way, don't raise your head too high. Those machine guns are nasty."
And if Madison dies in the final week of the war, then Aaron Burr gets to live with that knowledge.
"Yo, James," He jerked out his memories as Hercules flicked him between the eyes, "you spaced out there for a little bit. You okay, man?""Yeah, yeah, I just remembered when I met him back in World War One. He asked about Alexander...and kept asking." Madison said, but Hercules frowned at the mention of the First World War, but then his eyebrows shot up the second he heard the second part."Aaron wanted to find Alexander?" Hercules asked, brows furrowing, "I know he wanted to apologize and try to make things right...but, it doesn't make sense why he would go find him. Alexander has always shown up when he wants to."Madison smiled something soft and let out a sigh. His words to Hercules but his eyes were on Lin, "I do believe you're right about that." Eliza liked to know she was a strong woman. It was one of the things she had prided herself on throughout her three lives. She enjoyed knowing that throughout history, men and women (well, those who actually bothered to learn that there was something more to the Hamilton family than one bad duel) looked at her in awe. She had always pushed on through. Being the middle daughter to two smarter and witty sisters. She pushed through. Marrying a poor man with the knowledge that he'd die in the war before ever coming home with it unfinished. She pushed through. Her husband cheating on her. She pushed through and forgave him. Philip died. She pushed through. Her Alexander died. She pushed through.And now here she sat, watching the way Samuel Shepherd lounged lovingly on Lin and how the other looked at him like he was more than his world.She didn't want to push through. She wanted to be angry. That had been her husband, the man who had left her alone, the man who she loved more than she could ever hate him. And now, he didn't remember her or even their life. But, it was still so much worse that Alexander, even in the form of Lin, wasn't her's any longer."Are you alright?"She barely registered the way Thomas Jefferson sat down beside her. She had often thought the man was allergic to grass or something because he never really wasted his time outside. Eliza sighed, ticking a black strand of hair behind her ear and staring at the two, textbook in her lap forgotten. Thomas lowered his sunglasses down his nose as he followed Eliza's line of sight towards the couple."I'm not alright," Eliza confessed as her hands curled around the blue of her sundress, "because it's not fair. It's not fair for me to hate and be jealous of Sam because he has Lin. I know Alexander isn't present right now but it just still makes me angry because he hasn't been present. I want him back."Thomas snorted but it wasn't in his usual condescending asshole way. Eliza raised an eyebrow but the Former Third President only smiled, "You're not the only one, you know. We all want Alexander and it's okay to be angry because this whole situation is shit.""We're going to ruin them." Eliza nodded in the direction of Lin and Sam, the former of who was reading some tan colored book while Sam laid his head in his lap, "Them and their happiness. Alexander wouldn't love Samuel Seabury of all people in the way Lin loves Sam Shepherd. And Samuel Seabury won't like Alexander either. We're going to tear them apart.""Blissful ignorance."It was a weighted statement that most people wouldn't pick up on.Then again, Eliza wasn't most people."What do you mean?" Thomas didn't answer right away and Eliza narrowed her dark black eyes, a feature that had been prevalent through all of her lives, "What did you do?"Thomas sucked in a breath and bowed his head in a gesture she knew to be shame, "Eliza, please, you have to promise me you won't tell anyone about this. Because if the others knew, they'd go for my throat. Please.""Why would I tell anyone? I'm not Angelica, I don't gossip."The man smiled at the jab at Eliza's elder sister. He knew that fact to be true, as much as sewing club actually sewed, they gossiped a lot more than that. The smile disappeared a moment later. "I slept with Lin."Eliza was silent."It was Bostane and Robes' party. We were both drunk and it was just a hookup...but..." He trailed off but there was something glittering in the woman's eyes. Thomas would never have mentioned this, let alone ever, in any of his life admit to it, he was always more afraid of Eliza than Angelica. Angelica had always had her eyes on the horizon, the final goal, and hadn't cared who she had to stomp out to get there. Unless it was her sisters, of course, she wouldn't hesitate to sacrifice her own happiness for them. But, Elizabeth Schuyler-Hamilton, the woman who calmed the Lion. The woman who made James Madison and Monroe flee her home, one in horror and the other in tears (but he wouldn't say which was which) after Alexander's death. Eliza had her eyes on her feet, always moving forward and minding the people in her path. But, when she was angry, she caused more damaged than even he could. She went for the person, what was important to that person. And she would burn it.
"I'm sorry for your loss, Mrs. Hamilton," Jefferson sighed, staring at the grieving widow as he stood in her home. She hadn't offered him a seat, despite his presidency, and he knew she wouldn't. He wouldn't take one, a Hamilton, even a grieving one, would be a force of nature. He swallowed, remembering the way Federalist mourners had eyed him as he approached the home. The Federalists were a dying breed, but that didn't mean they wouldn't hesitate to defend their patron's widow, "as much as I hated Hamilton he was a good man."
"Thank you, Mr. President." The words were short, clipped, yet the woman always had her manners, "My husband was a good man. Now, why are you here?"
"I wanted to offer my condolences. I know how it is to lose a spouse suddenly. And I know how awful it is to get every 'I'm sorry' from people who don't understand. I know how angry you are that they left you. And I know how sad you are because you have to raise the children they left. I've been there, Mrs. Hamilton, and I wanted to tell you it's going to get better. You'll miss them everyday and it will always hurt, but eventually, you'll push through and it won't define you."
She stared at him, dark eyes watery but she only managed, "Thank you."
"You'll have his letters and you'll have his memories. That's what matters." Thomas smiled, "I destroyed everything my Martha had because I needed to do that because I knew I'd never get better if I saw her everywhere I went."
"I burned everything before. I have so little now. I burned the letters we wrote when he published the pamphlet. I tried to burn him out of history, I tried to destroy his legacy. Keep it horrible." Eliza let out a soft laugh and Jefferson just stared at the widow, "But, then I forgave him. And now, I know he's only going to be remembered by that damned duel."
"But you're not going to let it stay that way, are you?"
"Of course not."
Thomas blinked out of the flashback and from Eliza's passive features, he knew she was aware of where he had been. He blinked at her, feeling the warm sunlight on his legs and cold shade on his shoulders. Eliza let out a sigh, "But? But, what? Thomas, he's not mine. He was no one's when that happened. He was Sam's a few hours later. You didn't do anything wrong. You don't get a pamphlet.""It's just..." He trailed off for a moment, feeling that small amount of guilt that had burrowed into his bones get dislodged, but not dissipate, "when I woke up and he was still in my bed, I guess I realized something." Eliza raised an eyebrow and Thomas swallowed, that icy guilt in his bones was turning to hot anxiety in his stomach but he continued, "I realized that I didn't mind it. I didn't care that it was Lin and by extension Hamilton, in my bed. To be honest...I didn't want him to go."Eliza blinked and he watched the way her straight posture slumped, "No one ever does. Everyone seems to fall in love with him. I did. John did. You. Angelica. Everyone always seems to fall in love with him at some point. And their love never stops.""You knew about Angelica?""Of course I did," Eliza replied curtly, "I'm not stupid. I read some of their surviving letters after Alexander died. I saw their dance with words, I may not be as smart as my sister but I know her well. She always did like commas. But, I saw it before. I saw the way she looked at him when she introduced us. I saw the way she drank at the wedding. I saw the way she chose John Church and don't think for a second I didn't notice similarities.""What about John Laurens?""It was the wedding." Eliza confessed, "I was the bride and I was marrying the man I wanted to spend the rest of time with. But, at the reception when everyone was dancing and congratulating us, I saw John. He was drinking alone, so I approached him and asked what was wrong. Do you want to know what he told me? At my own wedding?" Thomas leaned forward, eyebrows raising in wonder, "He told me to make him happy. He told me that and finished his drink. And he said it again. Make him happy. I guess I didn't understand at the time why he was so sad. But, when Alexander got that letter that told him John was dead, I realized. Alexander always wrote, but he wrote little about John. But, I wasn't mad I didn't solely own my husband's heart."Thomas blinked, "You weren't disgusted in the fact that a man loved another man? Everyone was back then, but obviously, things changed.""I saw the way Alexander was torn apart by John's death. He cried once and then stopped doing anything. An entire week where he sat alone and didn't even touch a quill or ink. He just sat there. And I realized that Alexander loved him, not as a friend, but like a spouse. And I wasn't jealous. I actually wanted to rewind time and offer him a place in our marriage. I know it sounds weird, scandalous for the time especially, but if I had to share Alexander with another man I wouldn't care. I wanted him happy."And the Third President sat back against the tree the two had taken refuge under. A shiver crawled up his spine from the cold shade. They stayed quiet for a little while, sitting around, doing nothing but breathing. And finally, Thomas sighed. "We're all screwed, aren't we?""Definitely." "Martha," Washington sighed, head in his hands as he took in the way his wife frowned at the door recently closed by the school principal. "What am I going to do? This could ruin me. I could get fired."His wife blinked and suddenly she looked like stone, cold, passive and immovable. She arched an eyebrow, stood and promptly sat on her husband's desk, staring at the man in question. "Principal Howe said he has no ill will against what happened between you two in the revolution, but I'm not going to deny the fact that he wouldn't hesitate to gun towards you.""I didn't and would never do what he accused me of.""He didn't accuse you. He warned you that someone thought you were committing academic fraud for students who were revolutionary reincarnates," Martha spoke quickly, a small tell to her worry, "By law, he has to keep the name and information private. He's bending rules and laws for just warning you before the accusation becomes final."George looked up, running a shaking hand over his head, "What can I do? If I get tenure then I get academic probation and can't teach for seven years. This is an Ivy League school, eyes are already here and once word gets out someone is accusing George Washington of fraud? We won't be able to keep the news networks out.""And your name will be dragged through the mud.""And my career will never be what it once was. I got this position on my own merits before I made myself public. And if I get fired, someone is going to hire me basically for bragging rights of having George Washington on their staff. I won't be a person. I'd be a bragging right."Martha frowned, "Howe promised an investigation. A quiet investigation. I can have my firm make sure this stays away from students and people who don't need to know. Who would accuse you of this? Why would they accuse you of this? I don't believe for one second that you would fraud grades for any student, let alone a friend. But, George, you need to tell me right now if you did. I hold no judgment, that's what you called me here for, right?""I haven't..." George frowned, eyes flitting around as he sifted through memories, "I wouldn't. But, if someone is going to accuse me of fraud, then they must have something, right?""You teach undergraduate and graduate courses. Both in the law section of the school. Which, most of the reincarnates who go to this school go into. That's not damning enough, though." Martha frowned and then she blinked. Her face seemed to drain of color as she looked up."Martha? What's wrong?"She blinked, "George, please tell me you haven't been visiting reincarnate students outside of class. Their grade standings in your class are the top and if someone noticed the way you spend time with them...they might put two and two together."He was silent."George. Did you?""I did."Martha sat back, eyes wide and she finally let out a shaking breath. She ran a hand through her hair and steeled herself. "Listen to me, George, we can swing this. Right? Why have you been meeting them? If it's for extra help that you didn't offer to other students, then it's enough for tenure. If you sought them out and helped them, then it's practically fraud right there.""We've been trying to get Alexander to remember, you know that.""George," Martha whispered, eyes wide as she reached out and cradled his face in small hands, "that argument won't matter if Alexander isn't here. You can't prove to non-reincarnates that Lin is Alexander based on a feeling. People have argued that in court and it was always shot down. The school board will look into Lin's life then...and if the others have done things that aren't really appropriate, they may have a case to throw them out of the school...if not sending them to jail."And George just stared, silent in his horror as he realized what this meant."This is only if they can prove you did this. Then it leads to them." Martha sighed, "I need to know, George. What have the others been doing?"He was silent.He didn't know. Of all the people in the revolutionary set, Aaron Burr never imagined he'd be cornered by a very angry looking Lafayette. He hadn't expected to be dragged down the hallway, away from his dorm and towards yanked into Lafayette's, but he was powerless to stop it. If Lafayette could bench press Peggy for fun then Aaron, sure as hell, couldn't fight back. All he was aware of the bright lights of the hallway being snapped away as Lafayette slammed the door behind them."What did you do?"Aaron swallowed. He had seen that angry look before. But, it wasn't in any place civilian. The battlefield was sweltering and Lafayette was covered in blood. Shaking with a buzzing energy in his blood from adrenaline. His sword was dripping still-wet blood from British men and covered in the dried blood that had become so in the hot sun. Aaron stared at the sight as he saw Major General Lee being shoved ahead by Washington, the first time the stoic man had ever been physically violent away from the battle field on human beings. Aaron swallowed. And Lafayette whipped to face him and he for the first time saw rage. He saw the rage in the glittering of his eyes, the way he shook and the put together Marquis had dissolved into something beastly. It was-A hand slammed against the wall and Aaron jumped. Lafayette moved forward, shoulders squared and stretched to every inch of their height. "What did you do?""What are you talking about?""I saw how Lin and Sam have miraculously started dating. Despite the fact that Lin was hung up on you," Lafayette moved forward again, invading Aaron's personal space without hesitation, "what did you do to change that? I asked him today and you know what he said to me? Piss off.""I freaked out," Aaron sighed, backing up all the while, "and I yelled at him. I didn't mean to...I was out of a flashback and was just angry. I know, it was stupid. I should have realized. But, what can I do now? Apologize for telling him to stop trying? Apologize for calling him Alexander?" Lafayette blinked at him in return, but said nothing, "I'm sorry. I really am. I tried so hard to keep it together but I couldn't."Lafayette swallowed and the anger dissipated. Their shoulders hunched down and suddenly they were a few inches shorter. They let out a sigh, "I'm sorry. I had no right to be angry. I had no right to do this.""It's not your fault. I'd be angry too.""No, I immediately went after you," Lafayette bowed their head, "I'm just...tired. What Lin said to me just made me realize that he's not our Alexander. We aren't best friends anymore, we're not friends. He's not here and I keep trying to wake him up but it's not working. I'm tired of trying and failing. And I need my friend back. And he's not coming back. And why the hell am I even telling you this?" Lafayette let out an airy laugh, bordering on hysterics. But Aaron only moved forward, slowly, and placed a hand on the taller person's shoulder. Lafayette's eyes were on him in the instant it happened, "Laf, please, just breathe. It's alright. I want him back too.""I think we can all tell that." New York was cold at night and Maria knew that. But, it didn't stop her. She followed him slowly, staying back far enough no one would notice. She wasn't afraid of anyone grabbing her, she had Hercules at her side and pepper spray. The two followed quietly, discreet clothing. No one would notice them, hand in hand, laughing and talking like they were a couple. But they weren't, they were following one James Reynolds. "Where is he going?" Hercules laughed, smiling wide and fake as he looked at her, "He's not taking a taxi anywhere. He's been walking in a straight line for blocks.""He hasn't noticed us," Maria replied, smiling equally back, "I have a feeling he's going to meet someone. No one leaves the campus this late for no obvious reason. He's been acting weird all day, apparently.""I heard Lin telling Sam how he was stumbling over words today in class and practically ran to get out of there.""Doesn't sound good.""Not at all."Reynolds continued on until eventually, he stopped. Maria practically threw the two of them into the alley they were passing, but eventually, she leaned past the corner of the building. Just in time to see him walk into an abandoned building. Maria swallowed and turned to Hercules, "He went inside an abandoned building. Come on, we can find another way in."Hercules nodded and they made their way across the sidewalk, disappearing into the alley next to the warehouse. They could hear voices instantly. And Hercules motioned to a collection of piled up garbage below the broken window. And despite the smell and Maria's gagging the two moved to the trash and ducked under the window. The voices inside were something odd and finally, they came in clear. "I don't get why your bitch ass is wasting time, Reynolds," The voice was new and Maria blinked. It sounded familiar but she couldn't place it, "You wanted that Lin kid dead. We want the King Corporation to understand what it really means to take a hit.""I'm working on it," Reynolds snapped, "it's kind of hard to kill someone when you're on a cramped campus."Maria felt the blood begin to drain from her face and Hercules gripped her arm. The strange man just let out an aggravated sigh, "We pay for your education and you make the Kings regret their transgressions. They screwed us and they get to pay. There's no change here. The deal is simple. You wanted to kill this stupid kid and you sought us out. Stop stalling. That kid dies before the end of the school year or you do."Hercules just stared at Maria. His heart was in his ears and Maria's hands were clasped at her mouth. She was shaking, but she didn't make a sound. Hercules moved upwards slowly, and she grabbed at his arms, nails digging in, but Hercules only placed a finger in front of his lips as he stood. He glanced through the broken glass, eyes at window sill level, they wouldn't see him if he was discreet. The man who was speaking to Reynolds was alone. His hair was dark and his skin was heavily scarred with pink scars that crossed over dark skin. Hercules let out a small breath, quiet and the man only moved forward. His hand curled in Reynold's collar, hauling him close as he just grinned. "You know, if worse comes to worst, I could always haul that scrappy kid in here and cut him up myself. We gave you a gun so it'd be quick, we aren't animals. But, if you keep stalling, I'll cut him up in front of you so you can see exactly what I'm going to do to you."He shoved Reynolds away, but the man didn't fall. He only staggered backward, expression scared, "I got it."Hercules lowered himself. The window sill cracked.Maria stared wide-eyed as Hercules ducked. The two stared at one another, footsteps were banging closer and Maria closed her eyes in terror, hands clasped over her mouth and nose to keep breathing quietly. Hercules wrapped his arms around her and they sunk into the old plastic and boxes. A bag shifted and Maria kept her eyes wide open as the shape of the scarred man leaned out. He looked out with his head scanning horizontally. His hand was on the window sill. And it broke. Wood and dust rained down. The man swore and suddenly something moved from within their pile. It writhed and screeched. Maria went still and Hercules hugged her tighter. And suddenly, a rat broke free and hit the alley's asphalt. The man blinked at it. Maria heard a scuffling sound and closed her eyes. A gunshot exploded above them. And there wasn't a rat left to screech anymore. "Reynolds," The man called over his shoulder, disappearing inside, "do what I just did to that rat to the kid."Maria didn't realize she was crying. Lin didn't regret his actions. He couldn't. He'd keep it quiet and no one had to know. But, if they did, he didn't know what he'd do. He leaned down, kissing the crown of Sam's head and smiled. He adjusted his grip and ran a hand through the hair that was fanned out under his chin. Lin smiled to himself, happy that something worked out. He really didn't consider Sam a potential boyfriend, but the second he kissed him, he realized. They were perfect matches. They fit each other. Perfectly. Lin and Sam. Nothing could come between them.He smiled and then something happened. He didn't know what, but he'd remember it for the rest of his life.Sam's eyes flew open and he threw himself away from Lin (luckily they were on Sam's bottom bunk). He hit the floor and Lin followed without a second thought. Sam was writhing and twitching, hands clawing at his throat. He was making an odd sound as red tinged saliva began to bubble from his lips. Their eyes met for a split second and suddenly, Lin was screaming, "Call 911! Jesus Christ. Call an ambulance! Go get help!" George was on his knees, phone between ear and shoulder. Chase was already out of the room, yelling and shouting for the TA down the hall. The only one of them with any decent medical training. Lin only caught half of a conversation, but that didn't stop him from turning Sam on his side. He was trying not to sob as Sam coughed and choked and tried to claw at his throat with one hand. The other was holding onto Lin's shirt. "My friend, dear god, he's choking and seizing...yes, he's on his side...okay, okay..."The ajar door was kicked open, a woman diving down next to George, hands moving quickly. Charles was behind her, standing at the door to keep the crowd of horrified onlookers from getting in. He spat something about waiting for the ambulance and a large group of them went, presumably, outside to lead the EMTs up. Lin was holding onto Sam's strong hand and was trying his best not to cry."Come on, Sam, look at me," Lin found himself saying, "eyes on me. Help is on the way, just hold on. Come on."The TA, whom he recognized at Sally Hemings, was barking orders, but Lin didn't move. Everyone else did. He held Sam's relaxing hand in his. He was barely looking at him, eyes closing and lips blueing. Lin shouted his outrage as George and Sam hauled him away, kicking and shouting. He couldn't leave him, he couldn't leave him! The EMTs were already there, more bodies packing into the small room at Sally pulled away. "We have to go," Geroge said into his brother's ear, "we can't help Sam if we aren't giving the EMTs room."And the two pulled him into the hallway. A crowd of people was gathered, Sally yelling at them to keep clear. George had an arm around his brother, hissing at anyone who same to close. Charles had an arm around the two. George saw a horrified Nate Bostane and Max Robes staring. Charles saw the yellow-clad Schuyler sibling fighting through the crowd to get closer. Lin saw EMTs carrying his boyfriend out and away.And he felt numb.
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
Peggy had been there for all of it.They had been there when Lin just stopped fighting, when he sat down and stared after the EMTs. They offered to drive the three immediately and the two others who were actually reacting to their roommate just nodded and helped Lin to his feet. They had driven fast behind the ambulance. They had been there every moment, Charles and George holding onto Lin's hands while Peggy just curled up at his feet, keeping him warm and calm as he shook to pieces in a stark white waiting room."Shepherd," The doctor who came out hours later looked around the waiting room, but her eyes caught the four standing students in a moment. She approached them, a gentle smile on her startlingly young face, "Okay, well, I have a rundown. But, are any of you his family? I can't give you the information if you aren't family."Lin didn't say a thing, Charles did. "His parents aren't coming. I called and they refused to come visit their gay son, well they didn't use the word 'gay'. It's just us. He's an only child. He has no one but us, please. We're his friends and that's his boyfriend."The doctor let out a sigh, "Alright. You can come with me, we have a lot to discuss."And they followed. She spoke all the while, "We found a high level of toxic chemicals in Mr. Shepherd's bloodstream. His body started to attack itself once the levels reached a high point. His system incubated the toxins as his immune system tried to fight them, but eventually, it couldn't and so his body proceeded to shut down to fight it.""What were the toxins?""We haven't identified them yet, sadly," The doctor rattled off, "but we have him stable currently. All I can tell you is that toxicity in his blood and the rarity of the toxins themselves proves this to be premeditated."Peggy swallowed, "He was poisoned."It wasn't a question. And when the doctor nodded, Lin nearly collapsed. George was the first to speak, "Can we see him?""Yes. But, I need to warn you," the woman's voice was even, "he's currently in a medically induced coma. We have to wait for the toxicity to die down and for his immune system to rebuild itself a little. I don't know how long that's going to take, but if he can pull through these next few days, then there is no reason he can't get better."The small group filed in the small room after the doctor. Peggy swallowed once they caught sight of the prone figure on the bed. Sam laid still in the bed, surrounded by machines as if they had become his mourning family. Tubes seemed to poke out of every inch of visible skin while Peggy shied away from looking at his intubated upper region. If they couldn't stomach watching medical shows, then there was no way in hell they were going to look at that.Lin collapsed at the bed, gripping onto Sam's prone hand like the other boy might disappear at any moment. He just leaned forward, resting his forehead against the hand. Peggy swallowed down bile while George and Charles just held onto Lin's shoulder. George pulled up the chair that was at the side of the bed and practically shoved Lin into it. He rested a hand on the waves of Lin's dark hair, "Lin, you stay here. I'll get all of your stuff for classes tomorrow and I can bring you a change of clothes. Just stay here with him, alright?"Lin said nothing, his face was tight yet he nodded. George nodded at Charles before striding out, not before grabbing Peggy by the arm on their way out. Peggy didn't have time to react before they were out in the hallway of the ICU. The blonde man was the first to speak, "What are you trying to do? Because if this is some bullshit excuse to get close to Lin so you can wake up your precious Alexander I swear to god I-""I just wanted to help," Peggy shot back, "I heard the commotion from my dorm and I wasn't going to let any of you drive."George seemed to soften at that response, "Oh, sorry. I didn't mean to snap I just know your friends really want-""Don't apologize. If any of us ever tried that I would personally fist fight them myself." Peggy laughed, the two of them continued to walk down the hallway towards the elevator doors, "What do you think happened to Sam? I mean, who would poison the guy? He's always been so nice."George's expression darkened into something twisted at Peggy's words but the darkness faded a moment later. He inhaled and exhaled. "I have no idea who, but I have a feeling they weren't targeting Sam.""I was afraid you were going to say that."The elevator doors opened with a small tinging noise and George stepped in, "Peggy, feel free to stay. I have a feeling more of your friends are going to turn up. My parents own the hospital so no one is going to kick you out.""What are you doing?""Gettings Lin's things," George called as the doors began to shut, "I have a few calls to make as well." Thomas, James, and Aaron were the next to trickle in. They had heard the commotion about it from their dorm across campus and once they had realized who had been taken away to the hospital, they knew they had to run there. So, that was the odd lay down of how the three of them ran in, clad in sweatpants and the things they had been sleeping in. James was the first to reach the Nurse's station and he said, "Samuel Shepherd. Can we see him?"The nurse raised an eyebrow but then she saw the worried state of the three men. She let out a sigh, "Tenth floor, room 1011B. He's in ICU. One at a time, if you're bothersome up there security will come for you."The three men blinked and the woman just gestured to the elevator, "Go."And they did. The ride up to the tenth floor was silent save for mechanical whirring and breathing. The doors opened with a ding once their floor was hit, but not even a moment later, Thomas just sighed, "It's all gone to shit, hasn't it? I mean, Washington isn't talking to us, Sam's in the hospital, Reynolds and Jackson are still going strong on the asshole route, and Lin's memories are being quite difficult."James swallowed as the three of them exited, "What do we do? He's not exactly our friend and I have a feeling Lin may actually be angry if he sees us.""Try not to cause a scene," Thomas said to the two as they approached the door, 1009B, 1010A, 1010B, 1011A, "We don't want to get kicked out before he has the chance to know that we're here for him.""Makes you sound like a few rats, if you ask me," The three turned to face Charles Lee, dressed in a sweatshirt and pajama pants with cartoon fish printed across them, "If you're here to do anything with Lin, then leave. He's not your toy you can push and nudge however you like, whenever you like. He's hurting right now so if you want to drop any of your oh so subtle hints, then I suggest you be on your way."Aaron swallowed, "We just want to make sure they're doing okay, we don't want any trouble here."Charles hummed deep in his throat and pushed open the door to 1011B. He glanced back, dark eyes scanning Aaron before he simply said, "I'll hold you that. Your friend, Peggy, is here. They're getting coffee down in the cafeteria."Thomas smiled to himself, making a mental note to text Angelica to let them know that their yellow-clad sibling was okay. But when he remembered the severity of the situation at hand he let out a sigh and the grin was gone, "How's Sam?""He's in a medically induced coma," Charles replied instantly, expression grave, "The doctors aren't sure even if he's even going to pull through." He blinked and could practically see the question, "The doctors think he was poisoned. The reaction and the severity of what it did internally was too far from anaphylactic shock to be an allergic reaction.""Oh shit."James sighed, "What's the story going to be on this? Everyone on campus knew within the hour that someone went to the hospital via ambulance, in two they knew it was Sam. If this gets out, then there's a pretty big chance that there could be a push for Columbia to be shut down. If someone thinks a student was poisoned within the university and there's no proof to who did it, then...there's no telling what could happen."Chase said nothing in return. He didn't have time to react or even fight back when he was grabbed. George just let out a shocked squeak as Maria and Hercules dragged him into the closet. The light was flicked on and before he could even ask what the hell they were thinking, Maria just, "What the hell is going on?""Excuse me?""Don't play dumb," Hercules growled in return, "we followed Reynolds and the guy he was working with has a beef with the King family. We want to know what the hell is going on right now."George blinked, meeting the eyes of the other two head on but after a moment his shoulders drooped. He looked over at the shelf of medical supplies before he let out a sigh, "Okay, okay. You said someone was angry at the King family, correct?""Yes.""And, let me a take a guess, they threatened to take everything from Reynolds?""Yes." Maria answered this time, but she raised a finely sculpted eyebrow and frowned, "But how did you guess that?""The King family has been running their medical company since the 1800s. But, around the 1980s, profits for medicinal drugs began to drop. So, my parents decided to figure out why. It didn't make sense because the need for the drugs was going up, but their sales were going down. No one could find where the drugs were coming from. It took my parents years to narrow down where the drugs were being made but they eventually found it.""Where was it?""The West Indes," George replied, "I was already ten by this time, but my parents didn't stop looking. They eventually found that an internationally run cartel had been creating them, then sending the orphans of the West Indes to America to pay for their life and college, but the orphans had to distribute and sell. The orphans weren't investigated because they had made a name for themselves yet the signs pointed at them."Maria blinked and frowned deeper, a sense of disgust curling into her stomach, "That's disgusting.""It is," He continued, "but when that hurricane leveled Nevis back in 2011, my parents saw it as the best way to go there. They visited the hospital there and found enough damning evidence to have Interpol break up the ring.""Lin," Hercules said suddenly, "Lin was there wasn't he?"George nodded. "His parents were killed in the hurricane. My mother met him then and she moved forward to adopt him. My father agreed because he knew what could happen to him. I know Lin's always been bitter about the fact but, I have no idea if he knows the real reason my parents were there."Hercules cocked his head to the side, "How the hell do you know?""I'm set to inherit the company once my father retires," George explained, "and he uses the same passcode for everything. My mother may be the force behind him, but he has it all organized. I was confused when Lin came to live with us because my parents were so against having another kid.""Hell to raise?""Oh definitely," George laughed, "it was more hell because I remembered who I was early. My parents had no clue what was happening, they just chalked it up to raising a kid. I have no idea if they figured it out, but I wouldn't be surprised either way. Anyway, I read up on the Interpol emails and reports. I knew everything then, but when I met Lin I just had that feeling, the one you get when you see another reincarnate, yeah? I felt that. It took me a little bit, but I figured it out."There was a moment of silence but after a moment, Maria spoke."What should we do?""I have no clue." "What do you mean a student was poisoned last night?" A teacher from the psychology department shouted, Washington frowned and stared at the rest of the faculty. It wasn't hard to, after all, it was a full faculty meeting called in an emergency, "How the hell does that happen?"The Principal, a Ms. Ching Shih, let out a sigh, "I have no clue, but I ask all of you to keep the students calm. The last thing we need if for this University to dissolve into chaos. An investigation has been opened through the NYPD and all students along with faculty are subject to being questioned as of right now. The University is being treated as an active crime scene yet we are free to function normally."Washington blinked and frowned, "Students have the right to a lawyer, is the school providing?"Shih nodded. "A law firm head has a daughter here and they're willing to sit with students and faculty as pro bono."The room was silent. Teachers were sharing glances, worry painted across the various faces while many just stared at the floor, the knowledge of what had happened was beginning to weigh down. The tension in the room was getting tighter and tighter like someone was pulling on a rubber band until it couldn't be stretched any further. Someone pulled. "What if it was a student on student violence?"And it snapped. The school had become organized chaos. The campus had went from a fun environment to something awful mixed in with tense laughter and worry lines. And, it had happened in only a few hours. After the EMS had taken Sam away, tweets and texts had been sent out. The rumor mill was going strong yet that didn't stop the worry. That didn't stop what everyone was thinking. There was hardly a person on campus who didn't know Sam, if they didn't know Sam, then they knew Lin. It was a domino effect, but that didn't stop the underlying message. That didn't stop lonely people walking to class suddenly finding a group. That didn't stop everyone suddenly noticing three times the amount of campus security out, they weren't friends anymore, they were predators. But there was one thing everyone had been thinking.It happened to them, it could happen to you.And Philip was there for all of it. At first, he felt like some spectator, sitting on the outside as he watched the mannerisms take a complete turn on its head. He swallowed, looking away from the officer that had caught his eyes. Theo grabbed his hand in comfort. But now, he felt like some victim. Patsy shook her head, "This feels like some 1984 thing. We're being watched all the time now. It's like they're already pointing fingers even though they know we're friend-ish, well more acquaintances, with Sam."Theo nodded, "I have a sister who works for the Times and she's gotten nothing. I think the school is trying to keep it quiet.""Wouldn't you? Imagine how many kids would apply for a transfer if they thought that they weren't safe here. It'd be some mass exodus." Patsy replied curtly, fingering a lead that had landed on her skirt. It was red. She sighed, "It's three weeks from fall break. The school has only a few weeks before this gets out big time. Every kid here is going to go home and do what they do best. Gossip."Philip sat back. He frowned when he felt the bark of the tree catch the curls in his hair but he didn't stop. "Why is this happening?"His girlfriends looked at him, but he only continued, "Think about it. We're reincarnates yet we all show up here. We all want to find my dad, we've wanted that for years. And the second we find him, it all goes to hell. Why?""No one ever said your father wasn't, how you say, extra." Patsy smiled, "We have a problem, though. Sam is Samuel Seabury, correct?" Once she received the answer of nodding, she continued on, "If that is even a hint of the reason he was attacked...then, it's going down as a hate crime."Theo breathed, everyone knew the riots from the 1970s. Everyone knew how they ended up bloody and everyone knew that a protest against a hate crime would reignite old anger, "Oh my god. They'll riot.""Pasty," Philip blinked, eyes wide as he blinked at the memory bubbling up under-people are screaming for their rights, uniforms are pushing back, no one is listening, it's hot and there's blood with sweat, more people are pushing back against the uniforms, a shout, and suddenly there's pain-his skin. He blinked against it and he could feel the hands holding him in the now tighten, "there's a bad history with those.""I know."He swallowed and could practically feel the old bullet wound twinge with memory, "I died in one. How many people would die in one now?" "Too many." Jackson, on the other hand, didn't have a chance to run. He had turned when he heard the footsteps and only by his luck, he had turned right into the punch aimed at his face. He hit the ground, hands at his nose the second blood started to flow. Another punch his jaw and he jerked to the side, thoughts spinning. But, as soon as the punches started, they stopped. He glanced up, just in time to see someone yank a struggling and yelling Eliza Schuyler off of him. "Jesus, Eliza!" John Laurens shouted, holding the woman off the ground as she struggled and swore, "Breathe. Oh my god, breathe!""You son of a bitch!" Eliza shouted. She was angry. She was done being docile and the kind sister. She wanted to be angry and so she was. She had held her tongue too long, she had been the kind one too long. She was out for blood, fueled by the rage in her chest. She wanted blood and she wasn't going to stop until it was under her fingernails, "I swear to god. Did you do this?!"He looked up and paused. Her expression was twisted, her smooth facial features sharp. She howled. "Did you know?!""I-I didn't! I swear." Jackson shouted, blood was flowing through his tight fingers and he could taste the iron, "I had no idea it was Sam. No wait, I didn't do any of this. I had no idea any of this. Listen to me, please. I didn't know.""Where the fuck is Reynolds?" Eliza snarled. She stopped her struggles, but John didn't let go. The rage was foreign, terrifying and for the time, everyone knew how Eliza dealt with Hamilton. She may have been the equivalent of calm water, but calm water had a deathly undertow when it was seen. "If he did anything to Sam then he's going to regret even breathing."Jackson blinked. His eyes were wide in shock, "Reynolds stayed in last night. He didn't leave our dorm. He was sick." Jackson swallowed and he shrank away from the woman as the twisted rage across her face smoothed in emotionless marble. John looked horrified as he put the pieces together. The Former President let out a breath and began, "It wasn't me and it certainly wasn't Reynolds. Whatever you're suggesting...neither of us did it."Laurens blinked and set Eliza down. The woman didn't move, despite the blood flowing from her split and raw knuckles. The man grabbed at his mouth and for a single and awful moment, Jackson thought he was going to be sick. John wasn't, instead he whispered, "It wasn't one of you?" "It couldn't have been," Jackson growled, "listen, I don't like Lin or Sam or anyone in their group, but I would never kill any of them. That's too much."Eliza gritted her teeth, "If it wasn't one of you, then who the hell would?" "Officer," James Madison greeted as he sat down. Angelica was across from him while Aaron was next to him. The two of them seemed on edge, but then again, when the police invite you in for questioning about poisoning a student, then who wouldn't be on edge? "What can I do for you?""We're sorry about dragging you out of class," the Officer said, his eyes were narrowed and his tone wasn't friendly, but there was some hint of respect in his voice. "But, you can understand our position.""Three days of questioning students and from what I can see, no results," James purred, eyebrows raised, "your position is quite clear.""You may have written the Constitution or whatever, but don't get smart with me, kid." The Officer bit out. He grumbled something under his breath yet walked away when he saw the Captain waving him over. Angelica let out a sigh. She leaned across the table and the two men leaned towards her, "When I heard about the questioning I was all for it, but I didn't know they were going to turn half of the Student Union into their headquarters!" Aaron sighed, "The school is going to hell. It's been three days since Sam was admitted and Lin hasn't even been back to campus. The water lines are getting checked. Security is kicking in doors if they think you have anything that's against school rules."Angelica nodded, "I hear Bostane and Robes are trying to get the student council organized so they can have a student's rights thing with the investigation.""They always seem to be everywhere," James concluded offhandedly, "the lawyer who's supposed to be here is coming back, right? He's been gone for almost an hour and I have a paper due at midnight.""What's it for?" "Constitutional History.""You haven't started, have you?" "Nope." Aaron laughed and stared at the clock. It was nearing seven at night and questioning has been taking anywhere from fifteen minutes (Washington) to two hours (Lin). This was either going to be quick and painless or the exact opposite. He inhaled sharply and exhaled slowly. "Did you hear what Eliza found out yesterday?" "After she punched Jackson?" "Yeah," His voice dropped and he blinked, "apparently it wasn't Jackson or Reynolds. No one has a suspect. And this is only going to get worse if Sam gets worse." The three all shared a glance but the second they went to say something, the door opened. The three turned to face a newcomer and they all wilted once they saw it wasn't the lawyer who had the privilege of sitting with them during questioning. The girl blinked, frowning at Angelica, a spark of something lit up in her eyes when she saw Aaron but the second she saw James, she exploded. He didn't have a chance to react before he suddenly had a lapful of a strange woman who was crying and hugging him. She was laughing all the while. She sat back, her hands grabbing at his face. James blinked and something twisted in his gut but in all the right ways. He blinked. "Dolley?""Jemmy!"
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
"Okay, listen to me," Dolley said the second she had all of the attention on her. Everyone stared at the woman, she was tall and her accent pinpointed her location to Vietnam, "My dad has a lot of information on the school as of right now but, I don't know if he's going to use any of it." Jefferson snorted but his eyes were dark, "What the hell does that mean? He's the DA of New York City and if he doesn't do something with this information then the cops could tear this damn place apart!" The woman raised an eyebrow but her face was grim, "My dad doesn't act scared very often but there's something bothering him with this one. I have no idea what's involved or who, but if it can scare the DA, then we're screwed." She sighed but after a moment she dug around in her bag, she glanced around at the empty dorm room before setting the files out on the desk, "These are copies of everything my dad has on this case." James blinked, glancing at the shocked expressions of the Schuyler Siblings, "Are you serious? You made copies. Dolley, that's illegal! You could go down for obstruction of justice or worse." He paused for a moment, "Why are you showing us this?" "Because you guys can help me connect the dots," Dolley finished, "You think my dad is the only lawyer in the family? Besides, there's something about Sam or possibly Lin, that none of you are telling us." No one said a thing. "Spill." George King frowned, "How do we know we can trust you? You could turn us into the cops if you had the information. We haven't even known each other for an hour and yet you want us to spill every dirty secret. How can we trust you?" Dolley slammed her hand on the table, making some of them jump and the rest nervous, "Because I'm the only lawyer in New York who would go to bat for you guys. I'm the only reincarnate lawyer on the east coast who actually gives a damn. None of you get it. This isn't about you. If any of you go to trial or get slandered in the news, this shit goes global. It reflects on all reincarnates and suddenly we're more scrutinized than ever.""She's right," Laurens whispered, "we could get another set of the reincarnation riots back in the 60s and 70s. And most of you are the Founding Fathers, America could tear itself apart.""You trust me now?" Dolley asked, there were a few nods, but not enough to make any smart individual feel safe, "Look around you. Where's Washington? He's being investigated because someone reported that they thought he was faking grades so you guys could stay at the top of your classes. I bet you didn't know that, did you? Why else do you think he's been ignoring you? If he contacts you then it's practically a guilty plea. Someone took your main support column." Eliza blinked, the blood leaving her face as the realization hit her, "You think it's all connected?" "It has to be. All of this leads directly back to you and all of you lead back to Lin. So," Dolley slid the files across the desk, the light catching her features and casting wicked shadows across her cheekbones, "I need the whole story. If I can connect this and keep the blame off you, then it's a win. The police would have to take care of it otherwise I can take them down neglect. If Sam happens to die then it could easily become unintended manslaughter." Maria and Hercules shared a glance and nodded at one another. George eyed them the whole time but he eventually let out a sigh, "We need to all be on the same page. There can't be secrets anymore. Secrets that could get us killed if whoever tried to kill Sam finds out we know." There was a tense silence that followed.And the story and its respective secrets were told. "Mr. Washington," Shih said slowly as she took in the man across the desk, "I'm glad you could make it. We have very important matters to discuss."He raised an eyebrow, his shoulders were squared and his back straight. He looked every bit military general in that moment, but there was also the problem that Shih wouldn't be intimidated. She was a pirate who brought the British Navy to its knees. "What is it? Is it about my tenure? Or is it because of the recent problem with student safety?" She blinked, "Both. The school investigation finished being conducted two days ago and as of an hour ago, the board decided that you were framed. There is no evidence to you selling grades and there is no evidence of you doing anything immoral with your station here at this university." "But?" "I heard through one of the detectives that you are currently on the suspect list for Sam Shepherd's recent poisoning.""Excuse me?" Shih reached across the desk and grasped his forearm, a sign of comfort but there was an odd fire in her eyes. Washington blinked. He recognized that fire, he had felt it before. He used it before. He could feel memories pricking behind his eyes but he shoved it away. This wasn't the time. Shih nodded grimly, "Listen to me, whoever did this wants to pin it on you.""Why?" Washington responded almost instantly, "People are aware of who I am, right?""It's easy. If Samuel Shepherd is really Samuel Seabury like many of the other reincarnates on staff have theorized then this would make you the ideal subject. The man who lead the revolution being forced to teach one of the more well-known tories. The media would eat that up and you would be tried for it. Odds are that you would be found guilty. You're the perfect person to do it.""But, I would never.""Exactly," Shih said, she released him but her voice only got lower, "you need to realize that everyone is aware you wouldn't. That's what makes you such a prime target. Everyone loves tearing down the great, don't they?""Or the world would focus on me and the trial while those who actually did it got away?" "That as well.""What do I do now?" Washington growled, "If I go back like nothing ever happened then the criminal is going to try even harder to pin it on someone else. What do I do in your opinion? I want to keep these students safe but I can't have rumors being spread about me." "You're reinstated as of now, but, I need you to return to your business as usual with the reincarnated students you've been talking to," Shih explained, "if you suddenly act weird for no reason then that's good enough as a confession." Charles stopped the second he saw the way the dorm room door was ajar. He blinked, staring at the small sliver of the room that could be seen through the open portion, but then he remembered how they all locked it once they left. He swallowed, held his keys through his fingers like claws and entered. And the sense of dread that sunk his stomach as he walked in was overwhelming.Reynolds was there and he was tearing through Lin and Sam's things. "What the fuck are you doing?" He spat, there was rage there and it wasn't kind. Reynolds whipped around, standing but that didn't stop him from looking like a cornered animal. "I'm saying it again, what are you doing?""Walk away," he was shaking and there was sweat dripping down his forehead, "walk away. Right now. Please."Charles stood his ground and took a step forward. Reynolds didn't move, he just stood there with his hands shaking and wide eyes. Charles blinked after a moment and relaxed only slightly, "What's wrong?" "I have to find something. I need to find something." He was muttering to himself and Charles knew that it wasn't directed at him, "They'll hurt me. He's tired of waiting...I need to move or they'll do my job for me." Charles reached out, trying to steady the man he hated, but he was suddenly shoved back. His back hit the door and it slammed shut. There was a moment of confusion before he felt the bite of a knife against his throat. The breath left his lungs and Reynolds didn't cut deeper. He just held him there and was more than ready to push forward. "Renolds...please." His heart was hammering in his chest and the man in question twitched, the blade dug in deep but Charles' heart was pumping adrenaline through his veins too much. He couldn't feel it. His body was tensing and he could feel his senses screaming about flight or fight. He stood still. "You don't have to do this." "They'll find me. They'll kill everyone." Reynolds growled. "I need to get this done." "You're not hurting them." "I don't have a choice." "There's always a choice," Charles said slowly, keeping his voice even as he tried to keep Reynolds from applying force, "just put the knife down. I can vouch for you. I can help you, okay? We could get help. You could help us." Renolds growled, "They know. They always know." "I'll stay with you. No one will hurt you while I'm with you, okay?" Charles was talking fast, he could practically feel Reynolds' hands shaking with a nervous energy. The tendons in his arms were getting tenser and tighter and he didn't want to know what they could do to him. "Just...put the knife down." And he lowered it.Charles flashed a small smile, "See that wasn't so bad?" Reynolds said nothing. He just frowned. And looked at Charles with an odd look in his eyes. Charles didn't realize there was a knife in his midsection until he tried to breathe in. And suddenly, he was sliding to the floor, hands grasping at his shirt front as Reynolds tore the knife free. There was blood and not even a moment later, Reynolds took a step back. His hands were stained with scarlet the knife was dripping. Charles didn't see what happened next, he felt himself being moved then all was dark. Martha Washington ignored the jeers being yelled at her as she walked down the street. The men continued their vulgar yelling but calling her a selfish bitch when she ignored their 'compliments'. She didn't have time for this, usually, she'd yell back in angry Spanish, but not right now. She had somewhere to be. And ironically, the girl she was meeting waiting for her on the corner. "Ms. Hemings," She greeted, "thank you for meeting me." The Journalism major turned Med-Student nodded as she blinked. "It's no problem. When you said you wanted to meet me about the thing with Sam, I was more than willing. I'm their RA so I have to know these things."The elder woman nodded, "Walk with me." And they continued on until they reached a darker and secluded alleyway. Once the two women were tucked inside it and out of view from the street, Sally cocked her head to the side, "What did you need me for?""You have a job with the Post. I need to know what they have on the Columbia problem," Martha said as if this was a casual discussion, "I need to know. No other paper or even news outlet has anything on it. As far as my firm has found, everything is quiet about it. It doesn't make sense."The other woman nodded, "Someone has been shoving a lot of money our way to 'lose' the stories we have written on it.""And you're okay with that?" "I like my job, it pays well and I can still go to med school," Sally replied curtly, "but, here's the weird thing. No one has any idea who is shoving the money at us. And from what I saw in influx, it's a lot. I got a raise for agreeing to ignore it. They thought I wouldn't notice, but an extra seven dollars is too much for just 'doing a good job'." Martha hummed deep in her throat as she shoved her hands into her coat. Somewhere down the alley, a rat screeched. "No idea?""No," Sally answered, "I thought it might be the Kings at first, but the more I looked into it, it wouldn't make sense. Why would they try to make their sons the villains? EVen if it was some bullshit publicity stunt, then I highly doubt they'd go far enough to do that to Sam." "No word on Sam?" Sally shook her head, "Doctors are having the information under lock and key, I'm afraid. I can't get to it, but I have no doubt in my mind George or Lin could get to it. If their parents own the hospital then it's practically their's.""What about recent gang activity?" Martha whispered suddenly, "Do you think they could be a factor behind this? The money would make sense and the ease of access to the campus.""I don't run that column but I could find out a few things for you," Sally replied, "what's your plan with this information? How does it help you in any way? You're not defending the students in this situation. The DA is."Martha leaned forward and grabbed the larger woman by the arm. She pulled her closer and whispered in her ear, "Because if things continue this way, then someone is going to be dead by year's end."Everything was going to hell. Lafayette was sure of it. They looked at the blood on their hands and up to their elbows. They gagged at the scent and the drying feel of it on their hands. Charles was in surgery and no one else was there as of yet. They swallowed as they washed the blood from their hands, but it wasn't coming off as easy as it should have. This blood wasn't scarlet, not the rich reds of small and non-life threatening wounds, but the deep and almost back crimsons of internal damage. Charles couldn't die. Not like this. They shuddered at the memory of-There was so much blood on the floor. Charles was so still in the empty dorm room. The door had been ajar and it was by accident that Lafayette looked in. And they had just reacted.-finding him. It was awful. The blood wasn't coming off and Lafayette was resorting to scratching at it in their attempts to get it off. "Lafayette?" They whipped around at the haggard looking form of Lin standing across from them, "Oh my god, that blood. Whose...?""Not mine." Was the choked reply. Lin blinked, dark eyes trying to piece things together. "Chase was stabbed in the dorm."And the color drained from Lin's face instantly. He sagged against a stall as if he could barely stand on his own feet anymore. Lin sucked in a wet and ragged breath before he steeled himself as best as he could. It wasn't much. "Is he?" "Surgery. I haven't heard anything." Lin let out a breath but then he paused when he noticed the way Lafayette was trembling. He took a step forward, hands out as if approaching an injured animal, but then he gripped Lafayette by the elbow in the efforts to ground the larger person. "What's wrong?" "His blood won't come off." "Here," Lin whispered, taking soft and trembling hands in his own shaking ones. They seemed to shake together, one with anxiety and the other with exhaustion. The water from the faucet was cold on their hands. "let me help."
"Mon Petit Lion!" Lafayette cried when he saw the way Alexander was knelt over in the tall grass, sweat drenching his uniform as his hair was stained dark with blood that was a mix of his and dead enemy soldiers. He could feel the way the sun was baking him in his dress uniform, but there was no doubt in his mind when he saw Alexander that the man was already beginning to sicken before the battle even started. Alexander gagged on nothing as the Frenchman approached, "What ails you?"
He made a low hissing noise in his throat, trying to find the words. He spoke something in French, the broken form that he learned first, but that was another matter. It took him a second before he translated it into English. Lafayette understood both times. "I can't-I can't. Oh Lord, there's too much."
The other men weren't paying attention to them. They were trying to find their way out of the Monmouth heat before they joined their dying companions and rotting in the sun. Lafayette knelt down, hand on his friend's back as Alexander tried to move but the trembling wouldn't stop. The Frenchman knew of men who could do so much but their bodies would break down after too much time in the heat.
Alexander could do most anything with ease, everything with effort, but even he would ail with heat.
The taller and skinnier Frenchman picked up the Immigrant and rushed to the medical tent. He needed something cold, he needed so much, but they had so little.
"Lafayette," Lin whispered when he noticed the way the Frenchperson was losing color in their face. He squeezed the bird-like yet powerful wrist in his hand. Lafayette blinked down at him after a minute, "what happened?" "I had a flashback." "It's okay, just breathe. I get them too. You'll be fine." Lin was saying so much at once but Lafayette picked it up instantly even though Lin hadn't. Lafayette wanted to reach forward and beg for a glimpse of his Alexander, but he couldn't. Not yet. "Just breathe. I'm here, okay?" Philip and Laurens just stared at the mass of people gathering outside the school grounds. Students and community members were beginning to assemble. The two reincarnates stood close to one another, fears of previous lives being repeated were hammering through their veins. The students were yelling about wanting answers, the community members were wanting the whole story and not the pieces they were being fed through students. "They'll tear this place to shreds," Philip whispered, as he grabbed John's sleeve, "Chase was stabbed. Sam was poisoned. There's no suspect. John, no one feels safe anymore. What are we going to do?" The shouting began to grow into chants. Chants grew into a chorus of screaming. "Answers! Answers! Answers!" The two shivered. Memories were beginning to thread through their minds but John only replied, not looking at the younger man, "We have to try to do something." "John, you heard Dolley! We have no suspects anymore." Philip spun John around, eyes wide with an odd mix of fevered fear and rage, "Reynolds is gone, Jackson has an alibi for the stabbing and the poisoning. We have no one. And the school won't give out a story. What the hell is going on!?" "Something bigger than us." The shouting grew and the people were surging forward, despite the amount of police officers and campus security that were beginning to gather. Philip's grip tightened sharply while John only took a step back. A window shattered and suddenly, there was chaos. People shoved forwards, others tried to run, the security pushed back. Everything happened at once. The two only heard the pained screaming. And they tried not to drown in awful memories of past deaths as they ran. It was useless to try. Lin had been there since Sam was admitted. He hadn't moved from his boyfriend's bedside for more than an hour at a time. He stayed, Sam would need him eventually, right? So why not stay until he wakes up? The doctor, a Mrs. Abigail Adams, had remarked that Sam was getting better, albeit slowly but it was still better. And so Lin had stayed, taking a vow to never leave. But, that didn't stop the awful memories? Hallucinations? Daydreams? from tearing into his consciousness. One moment he could be sitting in the chair next to Sam's bed, reciting lines from his musical and then suddenly:
Mother is sick. And she's dying. And it's his fault.
"Oh my sweet boy," his mother whispered, skinny and shaking and too hot arms wrapped around him in a promise to never let go, "you'll do great. I promise." She coughed, a wet and rasping sound that sounded so wrong "You'll study and learn and be someone. Oh, my dear boy, you're so beautiful. Your mind is the best thing you have and you use it so well. You'll do great."
"Mama?" Was all he could manage around the lack of air he could get into his lungs, the heat in his body, the coldness he felt, and the blood that always seemed to gather in his throat and mouth. He coughed, red spewing from cracked lips, "Mama?"
"I'm here my sweet boy," She whispered, her arms were loosening but he didn't realize. Sleep took them often, but they were together. Where had his brother gone? He was still here, but where had he gone? To fetch the doctor, oh yes, that was right, "you'll get better. You'll get better."
Hands were stoking through the greasy and sweaty hair that was matted into strings at his head. His mother continued whispering, "You'll get better. You'll get better. You'll get better."
"Mama?" He sobbed against the pain.
"You'll get better. You'll get better. You'll get better."
It was so hot. Too hot. Yet, he shivered and cried because he was too cold. He was dying but no death would take him. He wanted to go. "Mama, please. It hurts."
"You'll get better. You'll get better..." And so she continued.
He noticed exactly when she stopped.
He felt the arms around him loosen.
And his mother was dead.
And he couldn't seem to die.
Lin bolted up, eyes wide as his stomach churned. Sam hadn't moved, but that didn't stop Lin from bolting into the sick man's bathroom. He collapsed on the floor, vomiting into the toilet bowl. He gagged, still tasting blood and bile. He couldn't stop heaving. It hurt. There was so much pain. And he kept at it, even when someone placed a hand on his back. It was large and bird-like. "Shh, shh," George whispered, "You'll be fine."He gagged and sobbed at the pain. "My mother is dead." He sobbed. George hugged him around the middle, avoiding his stomach area as Lin continued to sob in his brother's arms, "My mother is dead. I can't die, I couldn't seem to die. I leave a trail of corpses behind me." "No, no," George pushed, holding onto his brother as he tried to ground him somewhere real and here in the now, "listen. Those are memories. They aren't yours. Breathe, Lin, breathe You're doing great. Come on, let it out. I got you."Lin continued sobbing over a woman he couldn't remember the name of, he only remembered her dying. He sobbed until he couldn't, then he just sat on the floor with his brother. Rocking quietly as pieces of a life he didn't know began to work themselves together.
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
Lin came back to school on a Monday. Sam was still comatose in the hospital but he practically acted like nothing bothered him. He smiled and laughed despite all the worried looks sent his way. There was something there, a carefree attitude that hadn't been there before. Aaron had avoided him like the plague. One of the reasons being he didn't want to see the glare he knew that Lin would give him, but he wanted to avoid the topic of them for as long as he could.But, naturally, Lin had other plans."Aaron," Lin called to him as Burr tried to run, all in vain really because strong fingers had grabbed his sleeve and wouldn't let him leave, "we need to talk." Lin paused for a moment and when he saw the flash of fear in the other man's eyes, a small grin cracked across his features. "I'm not mad anymore.""What?""I'm not mad," He reiterated, "it's pointless to be mad. Sure, you said some pretty shitty things but that doesn't mean we can't get past this, right? So, I'm not mad."Aaron sucked in a breath and pulled away, "I told you to stop trying because you weren't doing anything right. How the hell can you just forgive that?"Lin smiled wide and Aaron could feel his heart practically melt. The clouds moved and the two were bathed in a warm golden light. "Because I know you. You're a nice guy, through and through. You'd never intentionally hurt me, right?""I-""I know you wouldn't." Lin cut him off with no hesitation, "Besides, you were one of the first people at the hospital after Sam went in. And, I know you weren't all that close with him, so I guess I kind of deduced you were there as moral support?"Aaron smiled nervously in return, "Lin, listen to me. I didn't mean to say those things...I was just stressed.""I understand."Lin's face was passive and even. And he realized one thing. Lin did understand. He understood flashbacks, he understood the stress, except he didn't know who he was supposed to be. Aaron sucked in a breath. "Lin-""No, I-I really understand." He said, his shoulders hunched over and suddenly he looked so much smaller than any version of Hamilton had the right to be, "I probably shouldn't tell you this or anything, but I've been having flashbacks. Like, full on different lifetime, not deja vu.""Do you know who you were?""No...I just know he-I? went through a lot."Aaron could only smile because if he didn't he either would have started to cry or scream, "Well, I've been through a lot of lives myself so if you need help with anything, just say the word and I'm there. No matter the time. During class? I'm there. Four in the morning? I'm there."Lin smiled wide, white teeth shining and eyes glittering. Aaron could practically feel a voice pricking at the back of his mind, a whispering feeling that sent shivers up his spine, You like his innocence. He doesn't know what you did to him-He shook it off. Lin grabbed his hands and laughed, "Oh thank you! Want to go for some coffee in the cafe? The barista said she'd swing me and friend a free latte when she was working.""I'm always a slut for free food," Aaron laughed.Lin cackled, "Same, same. Let's go!"And as he was tugged after Lin, the smaller man's grip on his hand never wavering, Aaron couldn't help ut melt just a little. It felt so right, did it not? "Welcome to your home away from home!" George laughed, pushing the door open and stepping into his family's penthouse. Charles followed in behind him, Lin even further back, "Since our dorm has become a crime scene and we can't go back yet, our parents said we could crash here. They went back to England a few days ago so we have the whole place to ourselves."Charles gaped at the view from the windows. He blinked against the glittering lights of the city. He felt like he was in a perch above it all, just staring out into the commotion like an outsider. He swallowed, "Really? You guys have this much space in New York City? Guys, this is like the life here."Lin made a humming noise as he flopped down on the large couch. He grinned at his brother and his friend, "Yeah, until lightning strikes the building and you can feel the current for days."George slapped him upside the head and Lin laughed in return, "Hey, don't frighten the guest!""Nah," Charles laughed and he shook his head. He sat down on the couch next to Lin, wincing as the sutures in his midsection pulled. He didn't need to look to see the worried looks, "I'm fine, I promise."
He woke up and he didn't feel any pain. He could feel pin and needles in his hands and feet, but then again, better that than dead. He let out a small noise as his fingers tapped against the wound. A small throbbing sensation started and then he felt a hand grab his. His vision didn't focus, but he heard a voice-no, wait, Lafayette, say, "Don't. You were stabbed. The doctors said you'll make a full recovery, just don't touch it."
"Hmn?"
"Hey, don't worry, you're gonna be just fine. You're probably so drugged up you won't feel anything. Okay? Just, go back to sleep."
Charles blinked out of the flashback before grinning at his two friends. "See?"The three sat back on the couch and stayed silent for a while. After a few minutes, Charles looked over at the brothers at either of his sides, "I don't know why Reynolds did it, but something was scaring him.""He stabbed you," George said softly, "I'm pretty sure that'd scare anyone.""No, before." Charles insisted, "He was going through our stuff, well more your stuff Lin and then I found him. I tried to scare him off, you know? Then he pinned me against the wall and pulled his knife on me. I said we could help him with whatever...then he stabbed me. But the point is, he was scared before. ""Why would he be going through my stuff?" Lin asked, his brow furrowed, "That makes no sense."The two slowly turned to George and after a few moments, Charles blinked, "George...do you know something?"George said nothing for a few moments, but then he let out a shaky breath. "I need you guys to promise you won't tell anyone if I showed you this, okay?"The two agreed almost instantly.And George stood up, the other two followed more slowly but together they made their way to a large door. Lin raised an eyebrow, "What are you doing? This is dad's office.""I know." George said sternly, "This has to do with the company and a large part of this is the reason you were adopted, Lin.""What the hell?""Trust me."Charles sucked in a breath, "This is insane...but, I think we need to hear him out."George nodded and then pushed the door open. The office was empty and dark, a small layer of dust beginning to gather from lack of use. Charles breathed in and finally said, "I thought he'd use this room.""The house has been empty for a while," George shrugged, "besides, dad hates working at home. Wants to spend time with the family, you know?"The three made their way across the room and finally, George sat in his father's chair. He switched on the computer and after he logged in, he went into the business files almost immediately. Lin watched, perplexed as George bypassed every security code with ease."How do you know this stuff?""Dad likes to use dates for his passwords. His and mom's wedding, my birthday, the day we adopted you. He's sentimental like that."And before anyone could say anything, George sat back. The computer screen glowed with files open and finally, George gestured at the screen. "Read, it's everything they have. Don't ask me anything until both of you finish.""George...how did you even find out about this?""I got curious." "Ms. Madison," Washington greeted as Dolley stepped into his office. He could see the files in her hand, "what can I do for you?""Mr. Washington," she smiled. Her smile was real and the emotion was real, and that made her terrifying. "I came to talk to you.""Why?"She sat down across from him and laid the stack of files on his desk. Dolley sat back after that and after a few moments, she spoke, "These files have everything. It has everything the investigation isn't telling you.""What does that mean?"The two turned to see one Martha Washington standing behind them, the door to the office clicked behind her as she entered fully. Her question was directed at the two of them, but her gaze was all for Dolley. "What does that mean, Ms. Madison?"Washington knew scare tactics when he saw them, but seeing them on the outside between two powerful women was honestly more terrifying than it had any right to be. Washington cleared his throat and as Martha went to perch herself on the armrest of his office chair, Dolley opened the files."Trust me, no one is being honest with anyone anymore," Dolley said, eyes glittering with an odd emotion, "I've seen my dad take on a lot of cases, but there's something about this one that is making him back down. There's more than enough information, from the files alone, to keep you, Mr. Washington, off the suspect list. Yet, you're still at the number one spot."Martha's friendly expression died instantly and suddenly, she was replaced by something cold. She leveled that dead stare on the younger Reincarnate in front of her. Dolley didn't flinch. Martha blinked, "Why is he still on there?""My main theory is that they either don't have a number one suspect for Sam Shepherd's poisoning or they won't name who did it," Dolley replied, voice low and even. "But, from an outside perspective, it does look like George did do it. Samuel Shepherd, a suspected reincarnation of a known Torie and an outsider to your um, squad, of reincarnates. Not to mention his obvious connection to Lin or as I presume, Alexander Hamilton. You were one of the closest people to him during your time together and to get him back, anyone could argue you'd do anything.""That bullshit," Washington breathed out. He swallowed the second he said it, but that didn't stop the mental of image of him getting dragged out of the school in handcuffs from happening. His reputation in both lives would have been destroyed. His life would come crashing down around his eyes. And he wouldn't get out of the rubble, "I wasn't even at the school when he was poisoned. I was with Martha and a few other professors. I'm not even in the same building as the biology department."Dolley's calm expression cracked and she smiled, "Exactly. Your alibi checks out perfectly.""You're going to use this aren't you and take down the DA, aren't you?" Martha said suddenly, Dolley blinked and frowned. Martha cocked her head to the side, "I'm right, then. Let me take a guess, you're going to blackmail your father with this, aren't you? He'd go down for criminal neglect, lose his license and then go to prison. Not, to mention he'd be run out of New York. But, what do you gain from this?""It's my nuclear option," Dolley sighed and bowed her head, "I took an oath to protect this city and if I have to force someone to do their job, then I won't hesitate. I love my father, don't get me wrong, but I'm not watching someone bully the DA into putting down someone who has committed no crime.""Someone is forcing him to do this?" George spoke up, "Why? Who?""Well, there's been a bit of a gang problem in the city..." He tried not to make it a habit, honestly. The walk was horrendous and the day was beginning to get colder. He hated it, but he continued doing it. Thomas just sighed and shoved his hands farther into his pockets as he entered Trinity Church Cemetary. He passed wordlessly among the headstones, ignoring the eroded names before he came to one of the largest graves in the place. It was quiet uptown, there were no cars on the road. Even the birds in the trees were silent. "Come here often?" Angelica's voice rose up from behind him, but he didn't turn. She was beside him soon enough, "You're not the only one, you know? Eliza's been leaving the flowers." She nodded the assortments of flowers, all in various stages of life and death. Thomas kicked a brittle dried petal away from him, "And John still talks to him. You don't need to feel bad.""I don't feel bad," Thomas sighed, "I don't even know why I come to visit. I hated him, you know? I mounted a bust of his head on my wall for god's sake once I had heard of his death."Angelica's lip twitched into a half smile, "Did you? Did you really? If I remember correctly, it was you who made it a Witch Hunt for Burr. Also, you never spoke badly about him again. Even with Adams egging you on. So, I don't think you could have hated him that much.""Maybe I didn't want him haunting me.""You made your own version of the bible where there is nothing supernatural in it." Angelica shot back as she elbowed him in the side. It was playful, Thomas's laugh was not and that was something she caught instantly, "You hate what you did, don't you?"He inhaled slowly and after a few moments of silence, he nodded. "I was a slave owner Angelica. I...Jesus Christ, I can't even think about Sally Hemmings without wanting to throw up. I tracked her down and I begged her to hit me, I begged her to do something. She didn't. I was crying and I was just begging her to do anything. Because, I had done everything to her, you know? But, she just hugged me and let me sob.""Sally is an amazing woman.""She told me she won't forgive the old me," Thomas just laughed, his voice was thick and Angelica just linked her arm with his, "but, she wanted to get to know the new me. I mean, how the hell can she not be pissed at me?"Angelica shrugged, "I'm not the person to ask. I know Sally quite well and I'm not going to speak for her. She's a great person.""She's a descendant of my daughter Patsy and I'm a descendant from her," Thomas said to no one, almost as if he was thinking out loud, "Ironic? Definitely." "Definitely," Angelica agreed, "So, back to our favorite Ham, what do you remember from finding out he had died?"Thomas blinked, "Well-"
"James," He greeted with a nod as his friend entered, a stern expression on his pale face. Jefferson looked up again, an eyebrow raised. He set the quill down, "What is ever the matter? Is Mrs. Madison ailing or perhaps your son?"
"None of that," Madison replied, he placed a folded newspaper from New York City on the desk. Jefferson blinked. He hadn't needed to return to New York City since the election. He reached for it and opened it. Jefferson read the headline, but Madison spoke it first, "Hamilton dueled Burr. Thomas, he died yesterday."
"The Vice President dueled him?" He reiterated needlessly, but he did it anyway. He stared at the paper but didn't read it, "What devil possessed Burr? Was he really that angry over Hamilton's support for me that he decided to shoot him?"
"I believe so," Jefferson looked at his friend closely. He could see the red-rimmed eyes not brought on by the Summer season. The black of his clothing and the white of his skin and hair brought it out. Madison coughed into his handkerchief, "What are we to do about this?"
Jefferson raised his eyebrows and set the paper down. He was calm, he had to be, but this was a deadly calm and anyone who knew him knew this. He may have been softspoken, but there was a large difference between calm and softspoken. "What we must. But, tell me James, were you not friends with Hamilton?"
"Once a long time ago, yes. We diverged after he showed his alliances to the Federalists," Madison sighed, "I felt betrayed by my old friend. But, now that I remember Hamilton has left behind seven children a wife, I regret our divergence more than ever."
"Burr made a widow out of a kind woman."
"I do not fear Mrs. Church as you do, Thomas," Madison shot back, "I fear Mrs. Hamilton more. If she put her mind and influence to destroy Burr, then she so could. Trust me."
"Even Schuyler money won't save the Hamilton's from debt." Thomas bowed his head, thinking of his own credits and lack of. He inhaled sharply but then smiled at the image of the yellow house in the city. He smiled at the image that even a man like Hamilton could find happiness. He wondered how. "I may not have liked Alexander, but I do not want to see his widow and the children-seven you say? My god-starve."
"I am going to New York to pay my respects and offer to end the debt of the family," Madison said slowly and surely. There was no changing his mind, "For, everything we, do not give me that look, have done. We slandered him relentlessly."
"How did this debt come around, if I may ask?"
Madison blinked. Jefferson didn't know if his friend realized he had a small smile. "When we were working on The Federalist together, he told me his dream was to build a home for his family since his had been robbed from him so often as a child. It is odd, is it not? I seem to forget how much had has-had gone through."
"As do I." Jefferson nodded and he glanced at the paper on his desk. He met his friend's gaze and both knew that Burr wouldn't survive this for long, "I wish you the best of travels. I will go to the city later to offer my condolences. There is so much work to do."
Thomas blinked out of it and finished, "James told me. It was one of the first times we hadn't shit-talked him."Angelica smiled, "I don't blame you there." She patted his arm and pulled away, "But, you know Thomas, you aren't a bad guy anymore because of your past self. Reincarnation is supposed to be a second chance. This is yours. Take it.""Believe me, I'm trying." "If you mind me asking, how does Alexander fit into it?" He didn't answer, but the blush did.She smiled. "Good to have you back, Lin." Hale greeted as he saw Lin enter the Theatre. He was alone and James could only muse it was because George wasn't letting Charles out of his sight. Lin waved and instantly, as well as surprisingly, plopped down next to James. Hale only continued, "It's been a long time since we've done a musical. Lin, you mind leading today's events?"And Lin only smiled. And, that was how James found himself standing on stage with Lin as a 'volunteer'. He hated being up here, not as much as Thomas, who wasn't there ironically. Lin smiled, bounced on his heels as gestured to the others with wild hands. "You have to keep the audience engaged, you know?" He gestured towards James, "If James and I are just talking or even doing a duet, we can't just stand here. We have to have movement on stage or peoples' attention is going to go from one hundred to zero. Rarely will you see dueting couples have a very complicated dance, their dances would either stop completely when they're talking or they'd slow down. That's why the chorus is so important!" He clapped his hands together and gestured to the people gathered behind him. "They're for emphasis!""For example," Lin lunged at James' hands and grabbed them, holding them to his chest and for a second his expression softened. James blinked. It was easy to forget he was just getting into character and that knowledge stung awkwardly, "You are the person I want to be with every day, and this is something I've been afraid to say. You're the guy, I am so totally into." James could hear the chorus. He could hear the harmonies. He could hear his heart. He could see Lin. Lin cut off instantly and dropped James' hand, "See? It works! Chorus is important, screw anyone who says the opposite!"There were a few cheers of agreement from the audience. Lin glanced at James and smiled, "Anything you want to add?"There was an odd tingling in his hand and he shook his head, "Nope." "You wanted to see me?" Max Robes smiled as Eliza sat down, he was friendly. He ran a hand through curly blonde hair before pushing his glasses up on his nose, "I thought you understood the physics homework? Newsten explains everything and you're the top in the class.""No, I got the work down," Eliza explained, wringing her hands as she sat back on the Central Park Bench, "I need a favor."His eyebrows raised. "How so?""You're the computer science major. I need your help to get into somewhere," Eliza said flatly. A pigeon landed at her feet and cooed at her expectantly. She frowned and Robes just laughed and tossed the bird a piece of bread, "I know its illegal but you know about the whole thing with Sam, yeah?"Max nodded, "Yeah. Nate still refuses to eat or drink anything from the school. Whatcha need? I'm not heartless but I do have limits to what even I can hack into."Eliza nodded, "Can you get into city cameras?""Of course, it's not hard." Max agreed, he motioned to his backpack, "Would you like to do it now?" "Not yet.""Why do you even want to do this? If we got this is like, probably a felony at least." Max shrugged, he took a drink of his Mountain Dew before adjusting his headphones, "And if the school found out, oh man, we'd get hardcore black-listed from every school in the states. Twenty bucks on me getting deported back to Puerto Rico.""I want to find Rey-I mean Ronald James. Everyone knows he stabbed Charles, but even with no proof he was behind the thing with Sam, he's on the suspect list.""He can't get back onto campus if that's what you're worried about," Max grinned, he tossed another piece of bread to the birds beginning to gather around him. Eliza smiled to herself when she realized he was giving more of his sandwich to the birds than eating it himself, "the school has like triple security and police on campus after that shit that went down at the Union last week."Eliza leveled her gaze and steeled herself. The wind blew and she faced the biting feeling head-on, "I know, I want to find him. I want him behind bars.""This wouldn't have to do with a certain Lin La Vega, would it?"And she flushed scarlet.He tossed his head back and laughed loudly in return, "Oh, don't worry about it, Sweetie. I've seen how all of your squad acts around him. You're all in love with him, I'm a solid ninety-nine percent sure. Don't worry," He winked, "I'm not judging. They guy's cute.""Yeah, well...""There's also the rumor going around that he's the guy on the ten dollar bill too." Max shrugged, "I don't put much stock into the rumors but, with all of you in one spot, I wouldn't be surprised." His eyes never left Eliza, "But, yeah, I can do the camera thing. Give me a time and a place. I'll be there.""Thanks.""No problem, we could even do it over coffee if you like," Max winked as he tossed the rest of his bread on the ground and multiple birds launched themselves at it. There was a rush of feathers and squawked, "besides, what Reynolds did was very unvirtuous." He could have picked this place, wherever it was, out of anywhere. He knew the feeling, he had felt it before. The emptiness of feeling but the whole sensation somewhere in his chest. He knew where he was. He couldn't name it. He had been here before, but he hadn't? There was a darkness engulfing him, pulling him down somewhere deep. He could hear things. So many things, but he didn't know what they were. Voices? Sure. Memories? Hallucinations? He couldn't tell the difference."Good day to you, Reverend. I see you're doing the Lord's work today." It passed him before he could realize where it was from. He didn't know it, but he knew he had heard it before. It was distant, something in passing perhaps."Are you really sure you want to do this, Samuel? There are consequences." That felt familiar. He knew those words. He could remember his mother saying them to him when he left. He made his choice. He had heard it from somewhere else. Where? He could smell the wet ink. The darkness twitched, then writhed and began to dull. It was grey now, the sludge holding him down was lessening and everything was buzzing. Another voice was getting closer and closer, "What about all that we've lost? The lives in Boston? Our dignity? Why should a tiny island across the sea regulate the price of tea?!" He knew that one instantly. It wasn't this life. It wasn't this life. He had lived another life. He was one of them. A Reincarnate.And it all came flooding in."Imprison the Torie! Leave him to rot!" slammed up against, "You're a reverend? I swear, these Patriots are goin' crazy. All I had was some loyalty to the King and suddenly I'm a devil. Unfair, you know? Mind saying scripture? It's Sunday." Memories. These were memories. Who was he? He knew himself now. But, the truth of the past was getting muddied. "War's over. We won. You said you're packin' up to go to Scotland? Well, I'll be damned. Good luck over there, they won't like you." He got the feeling whoever said that was right. He could feel another voice building and-"A reverend is a reverend, but don't get me wrong. You can learn all about the gospel here but you're a colonist, and plenty of people lost their kids to your people."
"Going back to the colonies? Well then, Reverend, best of luck to you. People like the church, they won't like you."
"Welcome to Connecticut, Reverend. You're always welcome here."
"I'm sorry, I didn't catch your name, Reverend. You're opening the church and I do think people want to know who his preaching, you know?"
He could feel it. The answer. The voices were getting louder. They weren't stopping. So many were asking his name. They weren't stopping. "Who are you?" "What's your name again?" "You were the farmer weren't you?" "Oh, you look familiar! Who were you again?"He coughed on the answer. He bit out the answer. He shouted it. "Samuel Seabury."
"Please. Come on, Sam, I need you."
And his eyes opened. Sam woke up choking on the tube in his throat. His hands were clawing at his throat and the lights were too bright. There were so many strangers. They were trying to help and he was still choking. Hands were holding him steady. He was choking. The doctor was yelling something. It was too loud. It was too bright. It was too cold. It was too much.But, he was awake. He was alive. "Oh, wait, you're that La Vega kid, aren't you?" Lin turned the second he heard the strange voice. He blinked at the stranger. It wasn't a student and he had never seen him before. Lin nodded, "Oh, you probably don't know me.""I can't say I do," Lin chuckled as he sat down at the cafe. It wasn't on campus. It was closer to Broadway and that's where he needed to be. The stranger smiled, "May I ask who you are?"The man's scars on his face stretched with his smile. His teeth were white. "People tend to call me by a lot of different names, you know? Most call me Vladimir, others call me Jack, the occasional few say H.H. No idea why, but, you can call me Vlad. That's how you know we're cool.""How do you know me?" "You're from Nevis. That hurricane killed your parents, remember? My people were supposed to come get you from the hospital but the Kings got there first."Lin's eyes narrowed. "Who the hell are you?"The scars moved on his face. They had an expression all their own. They showed more than his smile ever did. "Oh, but I think you know. Don't you? You've been avoiding your brother, haven't you? So, I guess he let you in on the family secret.""Cambios." Lin said instantly, "You're one of them. You took the orphans and had them move your drugs.""Plead the fifth.""What the hell do you want with me? I know your file. You just admitted you had people. And I was an orphan. Point A to point B."Vlad grinned and leaned forward, the chair was turned around and he rested his elbows on the backrest. "My dear, you're forgetting one thing. All you have is hearsay. So, I'm giving you something, so you give me something. Favor for a favor, you know?" Lin's gaze darkened and he could feel his heart beginning to hammer. This was bad. This was wrong. He was talking to a gang leader! "Well, I'll give you a few things. I Gave you my name. Interpol doesn't even have that. But, James Reynolds or as you know him, Ronald James, shouldn't be a problem anymore. He's been...taken care of. And my last thing, I'm not going to kill you."No one in the cafe was looking. They heard him. They didn't take it seriously. Lin swallowed and felt the blood leave his face. "What do you want?""What's your opinion of the Kings?""Excuse me?""They adopted you, yet you kept your last name. You don't feel like you're a part of them. You're the only non-white person at family gatherings and people look down on you, am I right?" Vlad's points were correct and he only kept talking the more Lin stayed silent, "Your 'brother' is going to get everything and you'll get some sort of payment as retribution. You're going to have to work and good ol' Georgie is going to sit back and do nothing. You don't see them as your family, now do you?"Lin knew it was his time to speak. Fear made him tell the truth, "I don't know. I-I don't know."Vlad rested his head on his forearms and just smiled, an authentic kind one, at Lin. "It's okay, you don't have to. But, listen to me, you're not one of them. You like them, I can tell, but you don't want to call them family. Not yet. You feel like they adopted you like you were some stray puppy.""You know the feeling.""Quick learner," Vlad chuckled, "But, I got everything eventually. I think you know how I swung that, don't you?"He swallowed down the bile and nodded. "So, listen to me Lin, I got a deal for you." Vlad began, he grabbed Lin's tea, took a sip and set it down, "When I give the word, a lot of my friends are going to get here. You know our story. The Kings destroyed us despite us giving kids education, giving orphans loving families, and giving kids a chance who wouldn't have had one anyway. They are rich! They don't understand anything I built."Lin went to open his mouth but Vlad only held up a hand, "Listen, kid, if you just say you're with us, you and your friends won't get caught in the crossfire. I'm fair. I'm not a monster, no matter how anyone paints me.""This is manipulation.""Of course, not!" Vlad laughed loudly, tossing his back. People looked at him in annoyance at the outburst, but they just rolled their eyes and went back to ignoring them, "Oh, trust me, doll, I got ears everywhere. I know your group. Say the word Lin, none of your friends die. And with the Kings out of the way, you'll get everything. You can do good instead of sitting in some high castle with so little access."He didn't stop, he only kept talking and Lin could only keep listening. "Don't you want to rise above your station? Don't you want to see good in the world and see no one suffer as you have? Imagine it, the two of us could do a lot of good together.""If...if I said I was with you..." Lin said lowly, head bowed and eyes on the table, "then that's only one return thing. You gave me three things."Vlad grinned and those pink scars stretched into something twisted and vile. Lin didn't look away this time. Vlad's eyes looked Lin up and down and he rested a calloused hand on Lin's. "Well, I think we could think of a payment.""I-I-""Your choice kid," Vlad whispered to him as he squeezed Lin's hand, "You know what they say, gotta break a few eggs to make an omelet."Lin inhaled and the hand over his moved. Lin blinked at the slip of paper. Vlad smiled and he stood, "Call me when you get your answer. Yes or no, I'm not going to kill you. I want to give you a chance, doll. Besides, next time, we could always meet up at my place." And Vlad just walked away and out into the crowds. He disappeared. Lin just sat there, a hand over his mouth. His stomach rolled as the tea steamed. He could feel the harshness of the paper in his hand. He swallowed down the bile. He didn't know what to do. A powerful person, sure, a crazy guy who was on Interpol's most wanted, just offered him a place to help people. Lin stood on shaky legs and threw the tea away. He couldn't tell anyone. His phone buzzed. He saw the number. And he ran.
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
"Everything's gone to hell," Tallmadge sighed, he sucked down another drink of his whiskey. He ran a hand through his dark hair before sitting back in his chair, "I haven't seen things gettin' this bad since the war."Angelica smiled and raised her drink in a mock-salute, "I can agree. So, another thing Mr. Tallmadge, besides the invitation for the drinks and all things that suggest, why did you ask me?""What do you mean?"She leaned forward, teeth bared in a smile, "You're dating Caleb Brewster, are you not? I hear things too."Tallmadge's eyes narrowed, but Angelica only continued, "Your spy life isn't stopping in this one. So, who are you giving your information to?""I don't know what you're talking about.""Don't play dumb. I've heard from two other TA's about how you always seem to disappear the second something goes down." Her eyes glittered oddly but she only grabbed his forearms. Her long nails stretched through his long sleeves, "So, tell me Benny, who is it?""No one bad, trust me."Angelica smiled, "The name.""You know her," Tallmadge sighed, "Dolley Madison. She paid me at the beginning of the year to give her information.""The beginning of the year?" Angelica raised an eyebrow, "What do you mean 'the beginning of the year'? We started in August. This whole thing didn't start until halfway through September!"Tallmadge nodded but eventually, he let out a sigh, "I'm aware. I thought she only wanted inside information about which potential law students to, well, hit up for jobs later.""But, then this happened.""I haven't told her anything since she started being on campus," Tallmadge growled, "I have nothing to do with anything that happened to either of those two. You can trust me on that. I know nothing."Angelica's nails dug in further, but she let go right after, "What did you tell her? Why did she want to know so early?""She said she just wanted to know. She's done this before," Tallmadge shrugged, "So I didn't think anything of it. I was going to ask Abraham Woodhull, an old friend if you didn't know if he'd like to get in on it, but he said no. I've done it before.""That has to be illegal or something.""No one had to know," Tallmadge sighed, "it was just some heads up, you know? But, just the fact she paid me extra this year confused me a bit."She blinked, "What? She paid you more. Do you think she knew everything would go to shit?""I don't know anymore," Tallmadge sighed, "I honestly don't." Sam blinked up at the two strangers who entered his room. He blinked again and saw a woman, older but not very, and a man aged well. The woman smiled kindly as she sat down next to him. He smiled. She looked like a mother."So, you're the famous Sam Shepherd I keep hearing about," The woman smiled. Sam blinked at her in confusion, he'd probably know her if he wasn't being currently pumped full of drugs, "Oh, sorry my boy, my name is Sarah King."He blinked. That sounded familiar."And this is my husband, Matthew. We're George and Lin's parents." Her smile was kind, "Don't worry, sweetie, you won't have any bills to worry about. Just sit back. We wanted to see if you were doing okay.""Mrs. King," It was honestly pitiful on how long it took him to slur out the words but Mrs. King's hand curled around his forearm, "it's nice to meet you.""Just rest, sweetie." Mrs. King smiled as she patted her arm, "We can talk when you are more awake. You're going to be fine."Sam smiled lightly, "Okay, mom."He closed his eyes and despite the darkness around him, he could hear a murmured voice. And then something else. It was far off and yet he knew who it was."Oh hello, mom and dad," Lin's voice echoed into his thoughts, "I hope you're aware that lying to your kids is bad."And everything was gone. Peggy laughed as they were swung around by Lafayette, the string quartet played louder and louder all the while. It was fun and almost exactly like the nights of parties from before. The largest difference was the low light caused by the lights overhead."Sometimes," Lafayette laughed, "I miss the old times a lot, especially now. Dances were so much more fun when everyone knew how to dance."The two laughed louder. Two other couples swung past them, too fast and too close to be proper. Peggy shook their head, "Can you believe it? Sam's awake and Lin's back."Lafayette grinned, "He's over the moon, but there is another problem.""What's that?"The taller one leaned in, lips brushing the shell of Peggy's ear. Couples swung past and the music crescendoed, yet Lafayette's words were clear, "Tallmadge has been selling us out since the beginning. And someone's been lying to him.""How do you know that?""Dolley knew that Lin was a reincarnate."Peggy blinked up and frowned, "What do mean? That rumor's been going around for weeks now. I'm surprised Lin isn't aware of it.""The rumors say he's Alexander Hamilton," Lafayette continued on, "Yet, Tallmadge thought that Lin was someone else.""So, Tallmadge didn't start the rumors. But, how does that prove someone was a liar?""They said he was John Andre.""Was?""As in Lin had a revelation and was keeping it secret. Tallmadge reported, Dolley kept that fact secret, all of us confirmed that that idea was wrong. Someone is aware of all of this. Tallmadge. Us, even before all the knowledge was out. Someone is ahead of all of us."The two pulled away from one another as the song ended. They bowed but then, Lafayette quickly snagged an arm around Peggy's waist and pulled the two of them to the side of the room. Peggy's eyes were dark as they looked up, "How are you sure?""I knew Benedict Arnold," Lafayette whispered, "he was the best definition of a snake ever created. We know how it goes. There is a liar somewhere on campus who knows about everything. On both sides. Peggy, listen to me, everything just got more dangerous."Peggy blinked and swallowed as the pieces slid together, "They're not on our side, are they?""That's the one thing no one knows.""'Something is rotten in the state of Denmark'," Peggy replied quickly. Lafayette blinked at the reference and nodded, "And there is a rat. And, I'm going to find out who.""That was exactly what I was thinking." Eliza smiled in a greeting as George sat across from her. The Eldest King Son raised an eyebrow as she leaned back in her chair. The chessboard of the park stood between them. Eliza smiled again as George looked down at the board and the white pieces at his fingertips."I got your message," He said simply, picking up the scratched king and watching it glint in the sunlight, "So, why do you want to talk?""There is a rat in the school and I like to think you know who."George set down the piece, "Well, I have no idea what you're talking about. All I know is that Tallmadge couldn't see through a lie. It's quite funny, the creator of a spy ring was lied to."Eliza chuckled, "If there's something bad spoken about Tallmadge, there's one thing I remember greatly," Her dark eyes flitted upwards and they sparkled perfectly with the pattern of the board, "that he's not stupid. Isn't it important to keep up the ruse?""You're saying Tallmadge knew about the lie and went with it anyway?""Who wouldn't?"George pursed his lips and just smiled, "I know many things when it comes down to it. I deal with secrets and especially here. I know who is sleeping with who, which teachers are flirting and who gets information from who.""So, who was Tallmadge getting his information from?""What is the point if I tell you right now? You could lynch the wrong man and right now, it's the last thing you want to do. The school is already tearing itself apart.""George," She sighed out the name, forgetting how once her sisters had giggled about what they would say to the king, "listen to me, please, you know how dangerous it is now. If someone knows anything about Lin, then you have to tell me who it is. I can tell Washington and he'll trust me.""For Lin or your husband?""Excuse me?""The worry," George replied, his face dead as stone but then there was a flicker of anger as he repeated, "are you worried about Lin or your husband?"A cold wind brushed her neck and yet, she didn't shiver. George's lights eyes were dark with his rage but Eliza stayed calm, "I worry for both. Lin has his right to live, yet I don't want to see my husband denied again a right to his second.""So, it's your husband." George blinked and then his rage snapped his passiveness, "And you don't get why I want to keep my knowledge away from you? You're in it for Alexander and I'm in it to protect my brother. All of you, that's all you want. Alexander.""I-""That's why you gathered around us, isn't it? To get closer to Lin?" George growled, "So, forgive me for being a bit slow to give out information. You want a name, Eliza, then you have to give me a name in return.""What do you mean?""You're the kind sibling," George smiled, "you know many people because people trust you. If I am to give up something, then so must you. I want to protect my brother and if someone around here knows everything enough to either lie or make accusations way back then, then they're dangerous. So, Elizabeth, I suggest you give me something before you expect me to give you something."Eliza blinked and frowned. This wasn't some game she could win. George meant well and he wanted Lin safe. Eliza swallowed down the guilt when she realized why she was even doing this. Insurance for her husband's safety and Lin's by extension. She never placed Lin first, only Alexander. She let out a sigh and looked up, George's pale eyes were on her and he didn't smile at all. "Max Robes has been hacking into the city's security cameras for me so we can find Reynolds." George rested his head on one of his hands and he gestured with his fingers, "Tell me something I don't know, you do forget that I'm in computer science with him, right?"Eliza blinked, trying to remember something that would be of interest. She blinked and remembered-
"Miss Schuyler," The voice was smooth and polite as he kissed her knuckles, "it is lovely to meet you. You're a welcome face in this world of strangers, I assure you." He winked and Eliza felt her cheeks grow hot. She could feel her sisters' eyes on her along with that of her parents as the man offered his hand. She only then heard the violins, "Would you be kind enough to allow me a dance?"
She shook herself free and rubbed her fingertips together with the memory of a ticket stub from a Broadway musical from a few months ago, "John Andre is on Broadway and he's been conversing with Lin." George blinked and smiled. "Nate Bostane has been feeding information to Tallmadge. I reckon he doesn't know who Lin is supposed to be, but he's probably too far in that Napoleon Complex of his to realize." Philip yawned as he walked back to the dorms. Frost coated the leaves and grass and he only hugged his coat tighter around him. The moon glowed and everything held a silver hue. He let out a breath and it was only fog. He adjusted his backpack and continued on across the campus. Something rustled behind him in the quiet of the night.He stopped. And turned.And instantly regretted it."Oh, hey little guy," The newcomer smiled, scars twisting at his features as he stepped from the bushes, Philip took a step back, heart beginning to pound, "no need to be scared. Just had to visit a friend, don't worry, I'm just heading through.""Why are you on campus?" Philip couldn't help himself. The man raised an eyebrow and the smile dropped, "You're not a student and you're not on staff. It's past midnight.""Needed to check on a few things, but hey," The man stepped forward and Philip swallowed as he stepped back again, "you're not going to say anything."There was a clicking noise and Philip could see the glint of the gun barrel in the middle of the night. He held up his hands and the man only chuckled, "Trust me, I don't want to shoot you if I don't have to, but if you don't get goin' then I'm going to have no choice.""I-" He couldn't breathe. Something was wrong. This was different. Memories were bubbling up, "I-"
"Oh my god, oh my god," His second was holding him, yelling in fear at the doctor to do something as Philip babbled helplessly. Everything felt fuzzy and on fire as his hip screamed with pain. Oh god, oh god. He was spitting up red-coated saliva as he cried, sobbing and shivering as the doctor ran over, "I want my mom, oh my god."
"I-I, what, kid?" The man sighed, he clicked the safety off of the gun and aimed it at Philip, "Speak up, I can't hear you. I hate mumbling."
"Come on, come on," His friend was carrying him and Philip sobbed. The doctor was at their heels, barking orders as he was set on the table or somewhere. He couldn't remember where he was, it wasn't Weehawken. It wasn't home. He sobbed and couldn't hear anything over his friend saying "I'm sorry, I'm sorry," as he held him down to stop the thrashing, "I'm sorry. It's gonna hurt."
Philip blinked, squared his shoulders, "Get out of here.""I don't take orders from Pipsqueaks." "You have less than five minutes before security walks past." Philip called over and the man with the scarred face only blinked in return, "You can leave right now and never worry about a murder charge. So, get out of here and no one ever has to know you were here.""No one has to know, eh?" "Yeah." Philip tried to breathe through the phantom pain tearing up through his side. His world was greying and threatening to tilt, but he stood tall all the while, "Just, leave. No trouble, all right?" The stranger only laughed as he put the gun away. Philip let out a shaky breath but then the man only turned back towards the path he intended to take. He called back over his shoulder, "Oh yes, and Philip, no one is going to believe you, you know?" And he was gone.Philip reeled. How did he know his name? Martha Washington narrowed her eyes as she shut the door behind herself. The lone student looked up and her eyes narrowed. He seemed to pale considerably as he stood. The conference room was empty and Martha blocked the door, he wasn't going anywhere. She breathed and remained calm, for now."So, Mr. Bostane," She greeted with a smile, "don't you know that lying about things can get you kicked out of school?" "Excuse me?" He blinked twice and Matha blinked. Got him. "I don't know what you're talking about.""Nathan, sit down." She growled and when he didn't, she roared, "Sit down!" And once he did, she stood back and admired the way Napoleon seemed to crumble under the rage of a woman. She approached him and he shrank back, "Why would you lie about it?""I still-"Martha slammed his hand on the table and he jumped. "No, you filthy little liar. You know exactly what I'm talking about. You wrote to the dean and you accused my husband of selling grades. You knew he didn't do anything of the sort. You just wanted him out of here."Nate blinked and suddenly, he wasn't playing games anymore. He blinked again and the scared student persona just melted away in the Hero of Austerlitz, "Now, Mrs. Washington, I'd be kind before you throw around accusations." "They're not accusations. You overstepped your bounds and you screwed yourself. I'm a lawyer and trust me, you're not scaring me one bit." She glanced over at him, he lounged back in the chair like it was a throne and she wanted to throttle him, "So, why did you do it? What would it get you?" "Someone offered to pay for my college if I got rid of Washington," Bostane shrugged, "I needed to do it.""Who?" "Why would I tell you?" "Because I will have you arrested and then bury the case so far into the system that you'll spend ten years in jail before you get to court," Martha growled. It wasn't a threat, it was a promise. Bostane only grinned when he realized she wasn't playing, "So, are you going to tell me?" Bostane held up his hands and laughed, "It's hearsay and this is illegal in itself. You're bullying someone into a confession.""No one would believe you.""And no one believes you.""Stalemate then." He nodded in agreement, "So, Mrs. Washington, if we're done here, then I should be going. I hear Samuel is awake, why don't you visit?"She chuckled lowly and he stared, "You really think I'm that dumb? Sweetie, I have the receipts for school orders and what's missing from the Chemistry inventory." Bostane blinked slowly and she could hear him swallow, "And as a Chemistry major, you're the first person on the list."He stood and went to leave but she caught him by the coat lapel. She hauled him close and whispered, "We know you poisoned Sam and we know you framed my husband. Your ass is grass."She could see the sweat on his brow and he swallowed, "There are no cops to arrest me." "Wait for it," She smiled and let him go, "also, happy Halloween."He stared at the floor and was pale. Martha only blinked at his reply, "Happy Halloween to you." Patsy yawned as she walked with Theo down the sidewalk. Jefferson only chuckled when he saw the two waiting for him. He held up his promised box of makeup materials from theatre club, "Thanks for waiting." "You promised to do our make up for Halloween, who wouldn't wait?" Patsy laughed, "Father-daughter bonding while also getting my makeup done for free? It's a win-win."Thomas raised an eyebrow and stared at the two girls as he tried to find the third person in their trio, "Where's Philip?" Theo frowned, "He said he wasn't feeling well. I already dropped off all the stuff he missed from classes today, but he was just acting really weird. He's probably really sick or something like that." "Well, he's a Hamilton, so the little shit is going to get better." And the three of them laughed. They walked towards the dormitory and after a little while, Patsy glanced towards the two security guards passing them. She blinked and frowned, but when Theo cast a worried glance at her she sighed. "Have you noticed that there is a lot more security?" "Well, we've had a stabbing and someone was poisoned this year," Thomas replied curtly enough, "why wouldn't there be more security?" Patsy shook her head and reiterated, "No, I mean, why are there more actual police officers? There just went two and they weren't in campus security uniform. And on our way here we passed another one. Dad, Theo, there are actual police officers here." Theo frowned, "Well, it's Halloween, isn't it? Maybe they're just going to stake out here to stop the parties from getting too hectic." "She's probably right," Thomas shrugged. He went silent for a moment before blinking, "Theo's Glinda and you're Elphaba, right Patsy?" "Yep." Patsy chuckled. "Aren't we looking just charming, Mrs. Rabbit?" John Laurens grinned at Maria. Her red dress glittered beautifully in the moonlight while he lounged back in his Continental Army Uniform. They looked like an odd pair, one blue and one red, "Enjoying the party, Maria?" She held up her shot. Tipped it back and downed it before replying, "Of course, it's amazing to finally be free of all the bullshit for the night. Come on, Lieutenant Colonel, let's go get wasted!" He laughed as she dragged him through the crowd of bodies. He didn't even hesitate to down the shot when it was handed to him and he just chuckled, "How long have you been here?""Half an hour?" Maria shrugged, "The Schuyler Siblings are around here somewhere." Her voice grew louder to be heard over the thumping and bass-filled music that fueled the grinding bodies, "But, I'm pretty sure Peggy is making out with Lafayette in the bathroom, so, don't try to find them!"John blinked and raised a mock toast, "Raise a glass! If those two can get together with each other, then there's hope for our asses after all!""Here, here!" "Oh, are y'all doing shots without me?" Hercules laughed as he practically flung himself onto John, the shorter man swore playfully at the sudden and large increase of weight and yet, Hercules on draped himself over more. He reeked of alcohol and his Continental Uniform was getting more and more rumpled, "Come on, I demand respect in my house!"Maria shook her head, "This isn't even your dorm, you idiot!" "Close enough." Hercules chuckled as he reached for another beer, "Isn't it nice, no bullshit for the night? We're all free!"John groaned from under the mass of the man, "How much have you been drinking?" "Enough!" Hercules sang, chest rumbling at the off-tune word, "But, pass me another beer. Hey, bartender!""Herc, no!" John cried in faux horror and Maria laughed, shaking her head and sending her mass of curly hair fanning out, "Wait, have any of you seen Lin and his group. I heard they were going as the Heathers.""Oh yeah!" Maria laughed, "You should see those skirts! Man, I wish my legs looked as good as theirs!" She took a sip out of her cup she had grabbed before continuing, "It was hilarious when they walked in, the amount of whistling. It was amazing! They even had their dances and songs memorized. It was a scene out of a movie, I tell you!"Hercules laughed and John sighed, "Why don't I doubt it?" Lin was regretting head home as early as he did. He wished he had waited for Charles and George, but he just wanted to go home. He shook when the cold met his bare legs and he hugged his green jacket closer to him. He frowned and hated the fact he shaved for this. He stumbled a step and felt the world spin from the alcohol in his system. He let out a breath and paused until it stopped spinning. He put his weight on his heels and began to walk, ignoring the stabs of pain in his heels as he did so. He just needed to get back to the street and he could get a taxi. He looked over at the science building and could feel the hairs on the back of his neck prick up. He went to continue walking but his feet stopped doing what they were supposed to. He stood there in the cold.
"Don't go that way.
"
"Excuse me?" Lin asked, turning around in the dark in the hopes of seeing someone. He didn't and he swallowed, "Okay, so now I'm hearing things. Man, I need to stop drinking."
"Take a different route."
"What the hell?" The voice was odd and he didn't recognize it. He shivered. Something was wrong and he didn't need some disembodied voice telling him it was. He steeled himself and inhaled, "Okay, Ghost, tell me what's going on."
"It's dangerous."
"Yeah, you said that enough. Who are you? What's wrong?"
"You'll die if you keep walking that way. Please, you can't. You'll die and so will I again."
"Hold up, hold up, you're like past me or something?"
"Don't go that way, get away."
Lin blinked, realized he looked pretty stupid just talking to himself with no one else around. He smiled to himself and took a step forward. "You're past me, right?"It was silent. And then the building exploded. He vaguely registered fire and being thrown away. His head cracked against the pavement as heat warmed him up. He didn't feel cold anymore and yet he could feel blood. Glass rained down and the voice that had guided him, just whispered in his ear, "We'll talk soon." And then it was dark.
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
"Where's my brother?!" George yelled, bursting through the doors of the ER. Charles was behind him, fingers twisted in his friend's red coat as George burst into the ER like a great bull of war. His pale skin was flushed red and he continued his yelling, despite the weird looks of the patients there. A nurse recognized him and scrambled towards them, "Where is my brother?!""Sir, sir," The Nurse stated calmly, "I need you to stay calm, you're upsetting the other patients.""Where's my brother?" George demanded, blue eyes wild as he fought the urge not to cry, "Where's-oh my god, where's-"Charles saw it first and before the eldest King child could tip forward onto the horrified nurse, he grabbed him. George just continued muttering his question as his breathing went ragged until it stopped altogether. George slid to the floor, heels scraping against the tile as Charles guided him down. George shook and tried to breathe but somewhere it was going wrong."Hey, hey," Charles whispered, holding his friend through the panic attack, "breathe with me. I know you can feel me breathe, just count with me, okay?"George didn't respond, he just shook. Charles didn't care about the awkward way his legs were sprawled out, he didn't care about the horrified yelling from the Nurse as she screamed for help, all that mattered was that George made it out fine. The Nurses were taking forever but then, someone was leaning in front of them. Small hands were clasped on his and Charles could only watch in shock as Sam Shepherd himself knelt down in front of them.He was thin and his cheekbones cast shadows, but his voice was strong. He pushed up his glasses and just spoke lowly, "George, listen to me. Breathe. One. Two. Three. Focus on the numbers and just...breathe. One two three."Nurses watched on in awe as the patient calmed the shaking boy down, but when George finally took a breath that he controlled, Charles hugged him tighter. Sam smiled when George blinked up at him. Sam smiled, "Come on, I know where Lin is."George just blinked and allowed himself to be helped up. The two supported a stumbling George on either side until they came to a room down the hall. And once they opened the door, Lin was sitting alone on a bed. His green coat was covered in dust and his hair was pulled back into a bun. A gash on his face was stitched shut while his legs were scratched up to all hell.Lin blinked, eyes focusing on his brother in an instant. There wasn't a heartbeat before Lin launched himself at his brother."Oh my god," Lin sobbed into his brother's arms, "oh my god, are you okay?!""Am I okay?" George whispered, voice thick with tears, "are you shitting me right now? Am I okay? I didn't get blown up!"And the two brothers laughed. Charles smiled and Sam returned it.And, if the Nurse walked in later to see the four of them curled up on a single-person bed all asleep, she didn't say a thing. The campus is hell in the morning. Students are running from their dorms to cars and back again. Rubble is being sifted through by construction workers and through the terrified mobs of parents being fought off by police, it was impossible to find any clear way to, well, anywhere. Eliza and Angelica held on tightly to Peggy, who had a large bandage wrapped around their head. It was an ugly thing, crushing their hair flat to their head as small shadows of blood gathered."Come on, Pegs," Eliza said slowly, her fingers tight in the yellow fabric of Peggy's coat, "just a little farther." She could still remember the terrified phone call from Peggy not even twelve hours before. She could remember Peggy's sobs as they told Eliza to get to the hospital. Eliza blinked out of it.Angelica shook her head, "God, this is awful. Who the hell could have done this?"As far as they knew, it was only the science building that had been hit, but there was no telling on if there were any bodies trapped inside. Nobody knew and that was the worst part. Over half of the campus had been shut down and that was just making everything so much worse.Peggy blinked, their brow furrowing, "The school is closed isn't it?"The two girls blinked. And after a few minutes, Eliza nodded sternly, "The school is on an extended break until further notice. The campus is to remain open to students who are unable to return home.""Are you leaving, Liza?"Eliza blinked, remembering her family in Ohio. She remembered the constant phone calls and text messages from her worried parents. They'd want her home, but she couldn't leave her siblings, not now. Eliza swallowed, "Not if I don't have to."Peggy just smiled.Angelica opened the door to the dorms and sighed, staring at the mass of people gathered. The common area was full and Angelica only shook her head before throwing at her other two siblings, "I hope the campus fixes the windows soon. Where are all of these people going to sleep?"Eyes were on Peggy and people moved away when they saw their bandages. Eliza gritted her teeth and pulled her siblings through, "They'll have to find somewhere. At least our dorm didn't get hit, right?""Is Lafayette out of the hospital yet? They crushed my phone when they fell on me." Peggy piped up.Angelica glanced at her phone and shook her head, "No texts from Herc, yet. You said Laf covered you when the windows shattered, right? So, they're probably getting x-rays or something to make sure the glass shards are all out or something.""They'll be okay, Pegs." Eliza smiled.Peggy just shrugged and let out a sigh, "What the hell are we going to do? My parents were talking about having me transfer somewhere else. Other schools have been offering students from her transfer scholarships.""Jesus," Angelica shook her head, "Why isn't anyone offering help to fix this bullshit? Everyone only wants to grab the students not fix the damn problem."Eliza blinked, dark eyes narrowing, "The President said he's sending in the FBI if this isn't resolved soon."The three just shook their heads in the same way to convey their annoyance.Washington shook his head and sat back on his couch. Martha was curled up against him, her head against his shoulder as she turned the pages in her novel. The news was the only thing on the television and at this hour, it was beginning to filter into weather predictions for the next day and political debates that were more yelling than actual intellectual debate. He sighed, reaching for the remote as two hosts argued with one another over the Columbia situation. It was a happenstance that he didn't change the channel when the breaking news icon glowed to life across the screen. The hosts stopped, sitting back before the female one spoke, "This just in, a body found this morning was recently identified as Columbia student Nathan Bostane. This information comes in after the explosion as the campus last night. The campus is closed until the beginning of the new year."Washington leaned forward and Martha lowered her book. An Instagram photo of Nate Bostane was plastered across the screen, he was smiling and a few others from his French History class were in the photo. Martha inhaled sharply, "Oh my god." The broadcaster continued on, "It has come to our station's attention that before his death, Nathan Bostane released a statement through his Instagram account. The statement reads as follows: As of the middle of the first semester, I framed Professor George Washington of Columbia University for defamation and lying for Reincarnate students. He is innocent of all crimes but, I was forced to do it by the leader of the Cambios Cartel, Vladimir Holmes. He is in New York City and he is behind the mess at Columbia. I say this now because I will never get the chance to say it otherwise.""Jesus Christ," Washington breathed out shakily, realizing what had transpired. A student was murdered for telling the world about what a cartel was doing. He was free from the suspicion but at the cost of a student's life, "He's dead." Martha blinked, "And he told the world about Vladimir Holmes."On the news station, an FBI agent appeared with a stern look on his face. Washington could only sit there in numb horror as the events transpired around them:
"Thank you, Agent Ford, for coming on the air, but I have to ask: Since we now know that the Cambios Cartel is behind the murder of Nathan Bostane, then what do you now think about the disappearance of Columbia student Ronaldo James?"
"In light of recent events and the knowledge that James has been missing for nearly a month, in my own professional opinion, I would say that he's either involved within the cartel or has been killed."
"He was behind the stabbing recently-awakened Reincarnate Charles Lee, correct?"
"Yes."
"First the stabbing, then the explosion, now a murder. Are the students at Columbia safe anymore? If someone like Vladimir Holmes could get into New York, then who else can?"
Washington turned to his wife and she turned to him. Martha's eyes narrowed as she felt her phone buzz in her pocket, "If Bostane is dead, then who is next? Bostane didn't even do anything that bad compared to what he had the potential to do.""Maybe that's why Holmes had him killed." Martha raised an eyebrow and Washington finished, "He didn't do everything they wanted him to do." Lafayette groaned and they hunched over as the dull pain from their wounds burst to life. They gritted their teeth and held a hand against their side, they could vaguely feel the bumps where the stitches were under the dressing of the bandages. "Yo, Laf," Hercules nearly fell on his face as he lunged to help his friend, "don't move too much. You're missing a spleen now, it's going to take a while for you to get up."The pain medicine was making everything dull and hazy. Lafayette blinked a few times before finally lying back. There was a gap somewhere in their memory, they knew they had been with Peggy, they knew they were at a dance across from the science building, then it got dark. They knew they had been hurt, but it was unknown as to how. "What happened?" "Someone blew up the science building," Hercules explained moving his chair closer to his friend's bedside, "you and Pegs were in the building over. The explosion blew in the glass from the windows and took out a portion of the wall. You managed to cover Peggy with your body when the wall came down on you two. Pegs only had a concussion and some lacerations, but other than that, they're fine." Lafayette relaxed when they realized their date mate was fine, "What happened to me?" "You low-key got crushed by the wall and cut up by the glass. But, the first responders and doctors both agreed that had you not covered Pegs, Peggy could have died.""Well, damn." Lafayette whistled lowly, then they broke off laughing because for some reason it was just so funny. "How long have I been out?" "About two days." The two turned to see John Laurens standing in the door, hood up over unruly curls and coffee in hand. He nodded at both Lafayette and Hercules before continuing on, "And in that time the school was shut down until the New Year for repairs-"Lafayette's eyes snapped open and their face lost the sleepy smile, "What about my education? I'm paying too damn much for my schooling to just-""Teachers are ending their semesters now and are sending out emails of what they want to be done for 'finals'," John soothed, "I don't think the school could survive being sued on top of the shit they have to deal with now, you know? But, I just got an alert on my phone, you guys..." He swallowed roughly and entered the room fully before he finished, "Nate Bostane was found dead today and he admitted to framing Washington."Hercules sat back and blinked, "Bostane? Really? He always seemed like such a nice guy." "How do you get the drop on Napoleon?" Lafayette grumbled to themself, "If someone cut off Bostane then that means they're going for the rest of their moles in the school."John took a long drink of his coffee before growling, "It's November. No one is going to be back, no wait, we're not allowed back until January. Whoever did it is going to have a hell of a wait or they're going to strike now." Hercules could only nod in agreement. "You are aware that we have to be out of the building by next week, right?" Max Robes yawned, pushing his glasses up as he did so. Maria narrowed her eyes pointedly and he only held up his hands in a passive gesture, "Okay, okay, yeesh. What do you need me to do?" He swung around in his office chair, glasses catching the blue light of the computer screen. His basement 'office' was cramped and more a supply closet, but no one ever came in unless he wanted you to. No one ever did a thing about his set up because no one in faculty ever found out because all of the electronic complain tickets always ended up deleted. Maria raised an eyebrow, "Your roommate is dead. I want to know why.""You want me to hack into the police and probably the FBI?" One pointed look at Robes sent him into work, fingers skittering across the keyboard as code glowed to life, "Okay, I can do that. But, I don't see why you care. Nate practically admitted to illegal activity and he is now a tragic hero because he was killed for one bullshit confession.""You're talking like you know things." He didn't look at her, he just tapped his foot in a response, "Don't get me wrong, Nate was a good guy to me, but I knew the bullshit he was up to since day one. He wouldn't come home until late, he would be jumpy. I just didn't think it would get him killed. So what he framed Washington? Everyone knew it was bullshit from the beginning. So what he dealt out 'shrooms, ecstasy, and weed? No one ever called him out.""You knew about Washington?" "I'm not an idiot. The administration knew he was innocent but they couldn't ignore the claim. They just played it out." Max snorted, his usually kind voice twisted into a sneer as he worked, "Trust me, I know what they did. It was quite unvirtuous if you ask me." "I didn't," Maria growled lowly, not caring whether he heard her, "But, can you tell me what the police have on Nate's murder?" He moved his chair so that she could see the screen of the NYPD inventory log. Maria swallowed at how quickly he got it done. He had told Eliza he had limits, but what were they exactly if he could do this? His nail tapped against the screen, "They recovered his wallet and ID, but not his phone. Well, that means that good ol' Nate had something interesting on there." Maria swallowed, "What about the body?""Cause of Death: four stab wounds to the chest with seventeen minutes before death," Max blinked, "Well, damn, someone wanted him to suffer for awhile. But, it says he was beaten beat beforehand. So, I'm going to say Holmes's people beat the shit out of him, then stabbed Vladimir him himself, before having them dump the body in the alley he was found.""Jesus Christ."Max sat back, drumming his fingers on the desk beside the keyboard, "I just wonder what he did. Odds have Holmes had him moving drugs but, what's the point with discrediting Washington?"Maria blinked and leaned down towards him, "They were setting him up. It all makes sense now.""They were setting up for Sam. We still have no idea who the hell did that.""I guess we'll have to find that out later," Maria nodded sternly but she stood straight in an instant, "Any luck on James Reynolds?" "Nah. None. Zip. Nadda. He's effectively disappeared." Max shrugged, "But if I find him I'll tell you. After looking at his finances, I can definitely tell you he doesn't have any funds by himself to stay underground for too long. I'm going to say that he'll show up before the school year's end.""I have a feeling you're right.""So, while we wait for the download of the NYPD files," Max chuckled, "Want to watch The Last Jedi? I hacked Disney for it.""Oh, hell yes."Theo looked at her father and let out a long sigh, "My parents from this life are coming to pick me up tomorrow. I know, we don't even get a Thanksgiving or a Christmas together, but trust me, Dad, it could be a lot worse.""How so?" Aaron replied, shoulders sagging when he remembered that Theo lived over in Ohio and he wouldn't be able to see her for almost two months, "We just found each other again and now we have to get separated?" "At least my parents aren't making me switch schools. There are four people from my Intro to Economics class who are being forced to switch to different universities. My parents are letting me stay here and that means that I get to come back." Aaron shrugged and laughed, but it was a sad sound and Theo just sighed and hugged her father tight. Aaron inhaled sharply and after a few moments, he finally said, "I just want this to be over. I'm tired of people getting hurt." "Bostane is really screwing with you, isn't he?" "We knew him and then he was murdered. Doesn't that screw with you?" "To be fair this whole year has been really screwed up and we aren't even halfway through it. What's next? A natural disaster?" "I wouldn't be surprised at this point." James caught Thomas by the arm and dragged him into their dorm before the taller male could do a single thing. Once he was free, Thomas whirled around and growled, "What the hell, James? I was going to class to pick up my graded work." His expression softened the second he saw the way his friend fidgeted and how James's skin had taken on a pale complexion. "James, what's wrong?" "Bostane is dead." "I know.""But, he left me this." Thomas looked down at the envelope James was holding out and he could practically feel his stomach drop. He swallowed and couldn't mistake the curled caligraphy of To Mr. James Madison written on the front of the envelope. Thomas cleared his throat, "Have you opened it?" "No." James said, voice high with his panic, "Are you crazy? What if the cops want this? What if this is some crazy manifesto? What if it has anthrax?""I highly doubt he would lace a damn letter with anthrax," Thomas offered with a small smile, "biochem major be damned. But, what do you think it is? Did you guys have some secret romance I should know about?" "God no. We've hardly talked. Only at one of his parties." James stammered out, "He was in charge of shots.""Is that the night of 'James Madison Does a Shot for Every Amendment'?""Yes," James answered but then he replied, "but, that's not the point. I have no idea why he would send me this. Or what would even be in it.""Let's open it."James nodded, set his jaw, and then tore it open. He pulled out the letter with shaking hands and Thomas held onto his hands to steady them. The letter was handwritten in Nate's telltale calligraphy and it was long. James swallowed and began to read:
"If you have received this letter then by this time my fourth earthly career has been terminated. My name is Nathan William Bostane and I know myself to be Napoleon Bonaparte of France, but this is beside the point. I have written this to tell you, James Madison, secrets that I have kept. You are probably asking yourself why I am writing to you, but my reason is simple. We aren't close and your friendships spread far. I ask that you tell these secrets and care not about the damage it does to my person. That is my final wish within this life.
First and foremost, I was the one who poisoned Samuel Shepherd. I used the Columbia Science Department and my position within it to gain Strychnine before putting it into Samuel's drink during his chemistry class that I was a TA in. Why? I did this because Vladimir Holmes wanted results of his payments for my tuition. He specified something disastrous that no one could miss. So I chose this. Samuel Shepherd was the best target because I knew his RA was that of Sally Hemings. I knew she had medical training and he would have a chance to survive it.
Secondly, I helped Ronaldo James, or more recently known as James Reynolds, escape from campus after his stabbing of Charles Lee. He had stabbed Charles and in his panic, I helped him escape campus by leading him away from campus before the paramedics arrived. I handed him over to Valdimir Holmes's men before returning to campus. I have no idea what happened to the man, but I can ensure you that he is either dead or wishing that he was.
Thirdly, The person who bombed the Science Building was one of Vladimir Holmes's men by the name of Cyrus Porter, or more commonly known as George Eacker. This was done because Vladimir Holmes realized my position may have been compromised. He was going to try and frame me for this, so this why I write this letter. I did not do this, the other things yes, but not this.
Lastly, I apologize for all the pain that has been caused by me this year. But, my reasoning for complying with these acts is because Holmes has paid for my entire life. My schooling, hospital bills, my journey to this country. If I was to go against him I would die or lose everything. He has eyes and ears everywhere and if someone betrayed him, he would hurt them in the worst way possible. I apologize for not being a stronger man this time around, I apologize for my lack of strength. I apologize wholly and irrevocably.
And this is where I end it. My life has ended and my story as well. So, I ask you, James, to make sure this letter is seen. Make sure people know I did this but not because I wanted to. Please, let people know that there are more people like me, more people who are under his thumb.
Tell my story because I will never have the chance.
Nathan Bostane."
Thomas blinked in shock the second James finished reading the letter. "My god, oh my god.""I-I-I don't know where to even begin," James said, his voice wet with the realization that he held in his hands the final words of a man, "I didn't know it was this bad. George told us about his dad's knowledge about the cartel Vladimir runs, but I didn't know it was close." "We have to copy this," Thomas said. "The school doesn't close for two more days. We can copy this as many times as we need and plaster the city with this. People need to know."James grabbed Thomas by the collar in an instant, "Listen to me, Thomas, listen to me. Bostane is dead. If we plaster this then we're going to die too.""People need to know.""What good does it do if we're dead? We can't see this through.""It doesn't matter," Thomas growled, "We'd be back in fifty years anyway. James, this is bigger than us. We can save lives and we can end this. We can make amends for mistakes in our first lives."James swallowed and said nothing.Lin clasped the candle tightly in his hands. The flame was golden and wild in the cold air and he let out a sigh. His breath was a cloud of fog and Sam just hooked their arms together. Sam hissed lowly, "Those damn reporters need to show some respect." Lin leaned his head against Sam's hair and sighed, "It's the memorial for Nate Bostane. He poisoned you, helped James Reynolds escape and other things. Of course, the media is going to be all over this. They want to see the student body's reaction before we all leave. This whole shitshow was practically his fault." "No one is singing.""What do you mean?" "It's a vigil and no one is singing or saying anything. We're all just gathered around the quad with candles. It's not very respectful is it?"He had to agree. Lin nodded and after a moment his shoulders sagged, "Sam, what the hell is happening here?""I don't know, Lin, but we're here. We're facing it together."Lin swallowed and nuzzled into his boyfriend's hair before finally letting out a sigh, "No, that's not what I mean. Haven't you noticed that it all circulates around me? You get hurt, then Charles, then Bostane our neighbor confesses to it. What's next? George getting hurt? Me?" Lin swallowed, he always had an odd way of being right and he could feel the tendrils of panic grasping at him.Sam frowned and his glasses glinted in the firelight, "I don't know, Lin. But, I'll die before I let anything happen to you." He kissed his boyfriend on the cheek before saying, "I'm serious." And then, just like that, Sam pivoted the two of them so that they faced the crowd that was practically watching them like hawks. Everyone wanted to know how the victims felt, everyone, wanted to know what they would do. Sam opened his mouth.The crowd leaned forward eagerly.And he started to sing.
"When I find myself in times of trouble, Mother Mary comes to me,"
Lin blinked and after a moment, he joined in,
"Speaking words of wisdom, let it be."
And one by one, the crowd began to sing. In all the fear and pain, in all the grief and anger, they began to sing. They began to mourn for a life they didn't know too well, a life gone too quickly,
"
And when the broken hearted people living in the world agree, there will be an answer, let it be."
And in that moment, they came together and sang, and everything was peaceful. And in that moment, there was only singing. But, there was a knowledge it would end eventually because as Lin looked around at the crowd in wonder, his eyes laid on that of Vladimir Holmes. And suddenly, with the sound of singing around him, everything wasn't alright.
|
10558724
|
Speeding Death
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{
"Archive Warning": "No Archive Warnings Apply",
"Category": "Gen",
"Characters": "Barry Allen, Eddie Thawne, Joe West, Iris West, Cisco Ramon, Caitlin Snow, Ronnie Raymond, Martin Stein, Henry Allen, Harrison Wells | Eobard Thawne",
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Barry Allen could remember the last day that he was alive. He had been struck by lightning, and his heart had stopped. He woke up nine months later to find that his skin had lost all color, his hair was solid white, and his eyes had a purplish ring around them. Barry had decided to dye his hair back to its original color, hoping that the pop of color would make people stop staring at him. He also used a bit of makeup to hide the purplish ring around his eyes. Today was his first day back to work, but before he could come in, he had to find brains to eat. So, he walks down to an alley, hoping to find a homeless person or someone that no one would notice, or miss, so that he could get his daily brain fix. He had carried a container with noodles with him to store some of the brains for his lunch, and that’s when he starts walking. When he stops walking, he finds a homeless man shivering against the wall, and that’s when he slices his neck, digging into his skull as he puts half of his brain in the container of noodles, eating the other half. Now that he was a zombie, he had to eat brains at least once a month to stay mostly human. To keep up with his speedster body, though, he had to eat ten thousand calories a day. Fun fact about his body: he can’t taste anything unless it’s spicy, oh and his resting heart rate is ten beats per minute. When the brain that Barry had eaten kicked in, the first thing he felt was an intense craving for nicotine. Great, this guy was a recovering smoker. Slowly, he raced into a clothing store, changing into clean clothing as he raced over to the CCPD. Once he was outside, he slowly walks inside the building. “You scared the hell out of us kid.” A voice greets. “Hell, of a nap you took there, baby face.” Another voice greets. “You still look twelve.” Another voice greets. “Allen, welcome back.” Eddie greets, pulling Barry in for a hug. Once Eddie lets him go, Barry was greeted by David. “Do me a favor, don’t scare me like that ever again Barry.” David orders, to which Barry chuckles. “I make no promises.” He teases, and that’s when he returns to his lab, slowly grabbing his phone as he texts Cisco. “Dude, this brain was a smoker, and I’m really craving nicotine, do you have any solutions for that?” Barry asks. “Nicotine gum, many people that are trying to quit smoking chew it.” Cisco tells him. “You don’t care, that I’m a zombie?” Barry asks. “Nah dude, it’s totally awesome! My best friend is a zombie!” Cisco answers. Slowly, Barry’s vision fades as he was pulled into a vision.
Barry watched as the guy he had eaten shivered against the cold, as he tried to light his cigarette. His hands were shaking furiously against the cold, and he ended up dropping the cigarette on the ground.
“Hey, what the fuck Jeff? Littering piece of shit!” A voice growled, picking him up by his arms as the man started beating the hell out of him. Slowly, Barry came out of the vision, slightly frightened before he realized where he was. “Allen, Allen, are you in there?” Eddie’s voice calls. How long had he been calling for Barry anyway? Slowly, Barry gets up, and that’s when he answers the door. “Barry, I’ve been calling your name for five minutes. Are you okay?” Eddie asks with concern. “Sorry, I guess I got absorbed into what I was doing. What was it you needed?” Barry asks. “You’re my ride along.” Eddie tells him. “I am?” Barry asks with confusion as he slowly gets up. “You wouldn’t happen to have any nicotine gum, would you?” Barry asked. “What is this brain you’re on a smoker?” Eddie asks. Barry had told Eddie that he was a zombie about a week before he was cleared to return to work, so it was nice having someone that he could talk to about it. “Unfortunately, yes.” Barry sighs. “Well, I can stop by a convenience store on the way.” Eddie tells him as they get in one of the police cruisers. It was about ten minutes later when they walked into the store, and Barry purchased the nicotine gum.Once he did that, he got back in the cruiser as he started chewing on it. “So, does anyone else besides me and Star Labs know?” Eddie asks, referring to the fact that Barry was a zombie now. “Not really. I couldn’t figure out a way to tell them: hey guess what? I’m a zombie, oh and I need to eat brains to stay me.” Barry tells him. Soon enough they arrive at the crime scene, and that’s when they slowly get out of the car, walking over to the edge of the pier. “What do we got?” Eddie asks. “Guy was walking his dog when he found the body near the edge of the pier. We were thinking suicide, but there were clearly signs of a struggle.” David informs as Barry gets closer to the body. The body had scratch marks around the arms and legs, and there was a hole in the head where a bullet was fired. Shit, the victim was a zombie. “A struggle? The poor girl was shot in the head! What kind of struggle could that possibly be?” Barry lied, pretending to scoff as he acted clueless. “Well, it was clearly a murder, question is, who could possibly want her gone that badly?” Anderson asks. “See those scratch marks?” Barry asks. “Yeah?” David asks. “There’s this drug called Utopium in Seattle, there’s a tainted version, and it makes people go crazy to the point of being homicidal. I’d say whoever killed her was high off the crap, thus the state that the body is in.” Barry explains.
|
10558410
|
Theres Never an Absolute
|
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"Characters": "Megatron (Transformers), Soundwave (Transformers)",
"Fandom": "Transformers: Prime",
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"author": "by ragnarok89",
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Megatron knew that their day of reckoning was inevitable.The High Council ruled over everything upon Cybertron. He knew that behind their smiles and dutiful actions, they didn't care who they stepped on. He loathed them all, more than he had loathed anything and anyone else upon the metal moon. The High Council was the despoiler of the caste systems, and their every look and touch he hated with all his might.He knew what he did, what he had torn away from what was built long ago. It was only fair, because they had already taken away all that he had left. It was far too late; everything he had worked for was destroyed.He had already gathered those who shared his views, who saw the caste systems as corrupt, and who sought those who should be punished. At such a reckless, desperate rate, Megatron knew what he had wrought, and he showed no remorse.Soundwave knew that his vow of silence was enough for him to work upon; he didn't need to say much, or anything, as his actions spoke louder than what words would become twisted into empty platitudes. He knew that words held such altering and consequential power, and he chose to be silent, to not be ignorant of what the truth was derivative from. He knew the actuality of the war; he had others to speak for him.He had Megatron to follow, and he awaited his every command; there was the point of return and they had already crossed it.Eventually, those who bore the badge of the Decepticons and those who called themselves Autobots then mercilessly tore at each other. As eons had passed, the ground beneath their feet weakened and died under the frost from the cold depths of space.They both were aware; they knew that they would gladly be guilty if speaking the truth was deception, that there was never an absolute.
|
10553666
|
Humanity Among the Stars
|
{
"Archive Warning": "Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings",
"Category": "F/F",
"Characters": "Kara Zor-El, Carter Grant, Cat Grant., Katherine Grant, Alura In-Ze, Astra In-Ze, Zor El, Jor El, kal el, Perry White, Eliza Danvers, Jeremiah Danvers, alexandra danvers",
"Fandom": "Supergirl (TV 2015)",
"Language": "English",
"Rating": "Teen And Up Audiences",
"author": "by TheWriteLauren",
"chapters": "2/?",
"completed": "",
"published": "2017-04-06T00:00:00",
"words": "2,575",
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|
Krypton AU
Chapter 1November 13, 2002 “Grant! Get in here, right, now!” Perry White seethed. Cat shoved her way out the crowd that had gathered around the TV, and hurried behind Mr. White to his office. He looked furious, in fact, his face looked exactly like it did that time last month when he threw his chair out the window. And that was only for a missed deadline! Cat gulped nervously as he shut the door of his office, and motioned for her to have a seat. “Grant,” he started, pacing back and forth like a caged animal, “what the HELL were you thinking?!” he gestured at the news broadcast that had been playing on repeat for the last hour. “I have no fucking idea how you got that second rate story past the editors and into print,” he gestured wildly at the front page of the paper, “and I don’t care, but it is an unacceptable! It is an unfounded, shabbily written piece of needless fear mongering! Look at the chaos it has caused!” He was yelling now, pointing fiercely at the bullpen full of people running about and typing frantically with looks of confusion and determination on their faces. All of them eager to get home and start their own preparations.“Sir.” Cat started.“Do not interrupt me, I am not even close to finished.” Mr. White glowered at her as he continued, “You have no solid sources, no quotes, for fucks sake you don’t even have a fully formed idea! Look at this garbage!” he shouted, hurling the paper onto his desk, the bold headline, “WORLD LEADERS CONSPIRE TO USE DEADLY WEAPONS ON INNOCENT CIVILIANS!” staring up at Cat like a damning piece of evidence presented by a prosecutor. “The world is in a panic! People are buying out store fulls of food! Gas prices have skyrocketed due to the demand! People are looting, Grant! Looting! Do you even comprehend what you have done?” he said incredulously.“People are being trampled death in the rush to stock up on ‘Apocalypse rations’.” Mr. White finished with a defeated sigh, sinking down into his chair and staring at Cat with a bewildered expression. “How can you live with that?”“Mr. White, I have no proof because there isn’t any. This is one government cover-up that would never have had enough concrete evidence to take public. However, the people had to be warned. They had to at least have a fighting chance,” she said firmly, never breaking eye contact, “ they couldn’t just wake up one day and realize that the world had ended, if they ever woke up at all.” She lost her nerve the, suddenly finding her hands, which were resting her lap, very fascinating to look at. Mr. White stared at her thoughtfully, “I understand, Grant, I really do, you obviously trust your source. I had sources like that, that part doesn’t confuse me. Even if it was wrong to publish.” he paused, and leaned forward to pick up the paper, studying it closely. “What I don’t understand, is this last part, ‘However, there is no cause to lose hope, there is a chance for salvation. The human race can live on, be at the Bonneville Salt Flats in Utah by November twenty-seventh and you will live.’ ” Mr. White read aloud. “What does that even mean?”“Well.” Cat began.“No… just stop, Grant. Look, you showed promise, but you’ve broken every rule in the book with this stunt. Pick up your last paycheck and clear out your desk. Go home, get some help, spend some time with your son. This isn’t normal behavior, Grant.” Mr. White looked at her sympathetically and sighed. “I hoped this job wouldn’t be too much for you. I thought a year as my assistant had prepared you better. I guess I was wrong.” Cat stared back at him. Spine, straight as a board, face, unreadable. “Thank you, Mr. White, for the opportunity.” She stood and turned to leave, then paused and turned back. “You should come,” she said quietly. “to the Flats, I mean. I know you don’t believe me, but what’s the harm in being there anyway? What do you have to lose?” she looked at him hopefully but he was studiously avoiding her gaze. “Goodbye, Mr. White” she murmured with a sigh.Cat slipped out of his office and closed the door as quietly as possible, hoping to avoid anyone realizing that she was leaving. No such luck, every head in the bullpen turned to watch Cat pack her meager desk decorations, a picture of Carter on his second birthday, and a picture of her father just before he passed away, into a box and carry it to the elevator. She got a few sympathetic stares, but mostly people were just confused. Why had Cat Grant, the Daily Planet’s rising star, junior reporter, throw away her career for one unbelievable story about the end of the world? As the elevator doors slid closed, finally obscuring her from view, Cat slumped against the wall. She couldn’t blame them, it was insane. But, it was true, and that’s what mattered. “At least I can spend all day with Carter.” Cat thought. “There I go again, looking for a bright side.” she smirked at herself. “I’ve been spending a little too much time with a certain overly optimistic Kryptonian.” she thought. Her thoughts were cut off by the shrill ringing of her cell. “Grant speaking.” she said tersely, this better not be some second rate reporter bothering her about why she committed career suicide.“Cat! Did you see the news? It worked! I told you I was fast enough to switch those stories!” the voice of an excited woman came crackling over the line. “God the reception is elevators was bad.” Cat thought, slightly annoyed. “Yes, I saw. I’m on my way home, by the way. How’s Carter?” she replied, jostling her box around as she stepped out of the elevator as she handed her access badge to the nearest security guard and made beeline for the exit. “He’s good! Great actually! I think he’s really gotten used to having me around that last couple of months while we’ve been working on this story.Anyway I called to say that I know you’re having a rough day, so if you want, I can go grab some pasta from that little spot in Italy that you liked so much last time?” the bubbly alien offered uncertainly, she knew Cat didn’t like to impose, but she really wanted her to say yes. Cat thought for a moment as she waved frantically to hail a taxi. Holding a box, talking on the phone, and hailing a cab was difficult to do, even for a brilliant multitasker such as herself. “Sure. Sounds great.” she grunted, almost dropping the box as she tried to open the door of the cab that had stopped. “Alright! See you at home!”, chuckling Kara continued, “be careful. I hear the end of the world is coming.” and with that, she ended the call. Cat stared out the cab window at the bustling city, cradling the box against her chest like one would a pillow. Another habit she’d picked up from Kara. “Right.” she muttered, “the end of the world.” Easy for Kara to joke about, she thought grimly. The end of her world meant Kara could go back to hers. They’d talked about it, but not in the serious way that it warranted. It was a conversation they’d both been avoiding, one of many that they had shied away from, actually. Maybe tonight would be the night they finally addressed all of the unsaid, uncomfortable topics that until now, had been religiously avoided. At least, Cat hoped so. TBC
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
Chapter TwoNovember 13, 2002Cat jerked awake with a gasp as the cab came to a screeching halt. She was temporarily dazed by the sudden awakening. Confused as to what the delay was, she leaned forward and tapped the cabby on the shoulder, “What’s going on?” she asked, struggling to be heard over the dull roar of car horns and shouting commuters.“Sorry ma’am,” the elderly Irishman replied, “this bloody idiot just pulled out in front of me, driving like a wild man, he was! I’ve never seen traffic like this in all my life! It wasn’t even this bad when those planes crashed into the towers last year.” The cabby shook his head in wonder. “Although that may be because everyone was too scared to leave their homes.”Cat hummed in agreement, “Perhaps, speaking of homes, I would really like to get home to mine. Is there any way that you know of that can get us there faster?”The cabby shook his head grimly, “No, there isn’t, and even if there was, we’re boxed in.” he gestured behind them to the lines of cars that seemed to stretch on forever, winding through the city like a mass of knotted snakes.Cat leaned back into her chair and set her box of meager possessions on the seat next to her. She stared at it forlornly. This was all she had left, she’d spent three long years working herself to the bone to get the desk that these belongings had come from, and this was all that remained. She’d be replaced by tomorrow, and the only context her name would be spoken in would be "the rising star reporter who cracked under the pressure and lost her marbles.” She smiled wryly, as if she’d ever been sane to begin with. A female journalist? That was almost as crazy as the end of the world.They all thought that were right, that was the maddening thing. They would never get to see her prove them wrong. At least that’s what they would think for the next few weeks, after that, there wouldn’t be anyone left to think.She exhaled and pinched the bridge of her nose to alleviate some of the pressure in her head. She and Kara had spent the last few days rearranging and rewording her article until it was perfect. With so little concrete evidence, it had to sound as believable as possible. No mistakes, no contradictions. Cat had to use every trick she’d ever learned to make it sound as logical as it did.Now it seemed like those long days and even longer nights were catching up with her.She picked up the picture of Carter from her box and cradled it in her hands. She needed a distraction from the monotonous sound of car horns and the suffocatingly thick air of the cab.The picture was taken two months ago on Carter’s second birthday. They had been in the park sitting on a bench eating ice cream, while Cat had vented to him about all of her work troubles. Carter had giggled happily at his mother’s dramatic hand movements and emphatic facial expressions.She had snapped the picture while he was looking up at her, grinning like she was his whole world, chocolate ice cream still plastered on his chin. The disposable camera had had only one piece of film left, it was a miracle that this had turned out so perfectly. She smiled to herself at the memory. It had been a good day.It had also been the day she had met Kara. The same jovial girl that was now somewhere in the south of Italy looking for the perfect pasta to cheer Cat up. She smiled again, brighter this time, for an entirely different reason.*September 2, 2002, Sunday Morning*Cat dropped her keys in dark hallway of her apartment building. “Dammit!” she swore quietly.Carter was asleep on her shoulder, exhausted from a long day of birthday fun, meaning she now had to attempt to retrieve her keys from the disgusting floor without waking him up. A feat that she doubted she could accomplish.Just as she started to remove her heels to squat down and pick up her keys, a young, slightly accented voice stopped her. “Let me get those for you.”Cat stopped taking off her shoes and turned to see a tall, blonde girl, reaching down to get her keys.“Here you go.” The taller woman said with an easy smile. “Wouldn’t want to wake the little guy, now would we?” she chuckled lightly.From the crinkles around her eyes, Cat got the distinct impression that she smiled like that a lot. “Thank you,” Cat whispered. “would you mind?” she gestured at the door. “I would appreciate the help.”“Of course.” the woman smiled and went to unlock the door. She unlocked it and held the door open while Cat stepped inside. Cat motioned for her to come her inside, she was intrigued by the kindness of this foreign stranger.“One moment. I’ll just put Carter down and then I’ll get my keys back. I don’t want him to wake up and I can tell that he’s starting to.” Cat hurried into Carter’s room and laid him gently in his bed, covered him with his favorite blanket and quietly shut the door.“Thank you for your help, that would have been much more difficult without it. And I’m not sure it would have ended as well,” Cat said. “I haven’t seen you in this building before, are you a new tenant?”The woman shook her head slightly, “No. I’m actually here to speak to you, I think. Unless you aren’t Catherine Grant?”“No, no, that is me. But, why are you here? Were you just hovering outside my apartment, waiting for me to return?” Cat narrowed her eyes at the taller woman suspiciously. “You look too sweet to be a hitman for the mayor, and if talking about his failed park rejuvenation policies is all it takes to get a visit from the mob then he is going to hate my next article.” Cat abruptly cut herself off when she saw the smile threatening to overtake the stranger's face. She arched an eyebrow at her. “What? Did I say something amusing?”Now the smile that the woman had been trying to keep under wraps broke free, almost blinding Cat with how genuine and honest it was.“No! Rao, no,” the woman laughed."What a strange word," thought Cat, “Definitely not English.”“My name is Kara Zor-El.” the woman, Kara, straightened her shoulders, almost imperceptibly, as if uttering her name gave her confidence.“I was looking for you because I have a story for you. A story that will be the craziest thing you’ll ever hear, but that will possibly save humanity.” Kara said earnestly.*November 13, 2002, Present Day*Cat’s smile faded, as did the memory. She chuckled to herself, they had come a long way in two months.The cabby heard her chuckle, “What’s so funny?”Cat stared blankly at his reflection in the rearview mirror, “I am sorry for interrupting your thoughts, ma’am. I just could really use a laugh myself right about now.” he glanced at the meter, they’d been “driving” for an hour and had barely moved a mile.“This traffic is brutal, I just thought if you had a joke to share…” he let the sentence hang, unfinished. He realized how nosy it sounded, now that he had said it out loud.“No joke,” she murmured. “Just a memory from a different time.” she finished, her voice heavy with emotion.
|
10511070
|
Looking Back
|
{
"Archive Warning": "No Archive Warnings Apply",
"Category": "M/M",
"Characters": "Levi (Shingeki no Kyojin), Eren Yeager",
"Fandom": "Shingeki no Kyojin | Attack on Titan",
"Language": "English",
"Rating": "General Audiences",
"author": "by raindrop_rouge",
"chapters": "1/1",
"completed": "",
"published": "2017-03-31T00:00:00",
"words": "3,392",
"Additional Tags": "Alternate Universe - Canon, Mutual Pining, Pre-Relationship, the ocean",
"Relationship": "Levi/Eren Yeager",
"Character": null,
"Relationships": null,
"Series": null,
"Collections": null,
"Fandoms": null,
"Archive Warnings": null,
"Categories": null,
"Bookmarks": null,
"Chapters": null,
"Comments": null,
"Completed": null,
"Hits": null,
"Kudos": null,
"Published": null,
"Words": null,
"Updated": null
}
|
This was ridiculous.The sun shone brightly above them, its light glistening across the dark waters crashing against the shores down below, and the air had absolutely no business being this cold.The wind had been less aggressive back at the settlement. Seeing the clear skies so early in the morning, he’d thought – naively, in hindsight – that the temperatures would climb as they’d ride to the northern coast. Waiting under the sun should have been… Possibly not comfortable, but certainly not this ridiculously unbearable.Levi barely held back another shudder, as the icy coastal wind ripped at his cloak, and lashed at his back, dark green fabric flapping around him. Next time he’d be sent to the ocean to welcome back an expedition, he’d wear his winter gear. Did the ocean have its own micro-climate? He’d have to ask Hange later.If the ship they were expecting back made him wait much longer, his ears and fingers were going to fall off.He wondered what use Hange would manage to come up with for him then.Best not to find out though. He attempted to subtly hug his cloak tighter around him. Had he been alone, he probably would have wrapped it around his head too, because the cold really was just that ridiculous. Might as well match. He considered at least tugging the worn fabric up over his ears, and probably would have, had anyone else been with him. He didn’t suspect anyone else would dare comment.Anyone, that was, but Eren.And of course Eren had insisted on coming with him.Levi had tried not to read into it. Eren had been on his fair share of expeditions, as had Levi, so it made sense they’d stop insisting on going at about the same time. Levi, as much as he would never admit it, had been tiring; Eren had claimed it was time for him to help back at home (“home” to Eren had apparently become any charted territory). And while on this day Levi had been assigned to relay information from Commander Hange to the returnees and back, Eren had a best friend to greet. The young Arlert had been leading the expedition, and Hange had seen no issue with letting Eren help organize their return. Trying not to read into it about it was unfortunately not enough to stop him from knowing.And trying to ignore what he knew was unfortunately not enough to prevent his nerves from zipping with tension, whenever Eren’s gaze slipped from the horizon to him.Which was frequently.Another gust of wind almost convinced him to uncross his arms and protect his ears from the biting chill, but then he wouldn’t be able to listen to Eren.The young man – it was a relief to never have to think of him as “the boy” anymore – was telling him all about the latest development projects he’d been working on. Turns out some people, mostly ex- Survey Corps members, enjoyed the relative proximity to the ocean, so what was meant to be a minor outpost was gradually turning into a village. Over the past months, Eren had helped build wells, set up a sewage system – how something sounding so gross could be the key to hygiene remained a mystery to Levi – and more recently, he’d helped prepare farmable lands, for whatever plants and crops Arlert and his crew might bring back.“… more like an outdoor lab for Hange than a proper farm that’ll sustain the town in the future, but we have time to work on the rest of the surrounding lands. And hey, you never know, they might come up with some amazing new technique to grow crops, and then we would be able to implement that everywhere else straight away.”There had been a time where Eren had been hesitant to speak more than Levi in their conversations. He’d been determined to be concise and only reacted to Levi’s actions. Which made sense, coming from most soldiers towards anyone higher in rank. But Eren’s mild anxiety around him didn’t come from deference to rank, he was sure.No, once he’d started looking closer, he’d found Eren had only feared Levi’s indifference – Eren raced to make his point out of fear of losing his Captain’s attention along the way, or worse, being cut off.And once he’d started looking closer, he’d been doomed.Levi had found Eren looking straight back, a gaze that steadily gained in confidence over the years. As did Eren’s voice, whose lower pitch took Levi by surprise. A far too pleasant surprise. It shed any wavering it might have once had in Levi’s presence, lost any stumbling over words; and eventually, that quick pace, the haste with which he delivered his messages, vanished too.Levi found himself drawn into conversations where more than strictly necessary information was exchanged. He never knew who started them. Maybe he’d softened. Maybe Eren had become bolder.The boy never had been weak, or at least, never as weak as he believed himself to be; but over the years, he grew to be strong, in every sense of the word. Mature. Reliable.Attractive.The point was, Eren had changed, but he never looked away. Everything might have been easier, had he only.“… and so if we get that approved, we’ll all have running hot water at any time of the day in our homes. Though of course, nothing will stop you if you’d rather keep boiling water separately. To keep sparing some for your tea.” Eren shot a bright smile in Levi’s direction.Levi clenched his jaw to prevent his teeth from chattering. Thinking of hot tea helped, though. “Sir?”Ah, he’d let Eren carry their conversation again, hadn’t he. He had to say something now, and he found himself scrambling for an acceptable answer. Not because he hadn’t listened (how could anyone ignore Eren?) – but because once again, there was no distance to entertain between him and Eren, the way there was between him and most others; and at the same time, he was terrified of giving too much away.Then his eyes met Eren’s, and words came on their own, instinctive.“We’re lucky Hange was authorized to come this far out with us. They’ve been proving rather useful so far, I’ll admit. Though I bet they make sure of it, knowing it’s the only reason we don’t lock ‘em up,” Levi forced through lips numbed by the cold.Eren laughed freely, a gorgeous, rich sound. Laughing suited him, Levi considered, before slamming the breaks on that train of thought.“Any of their inventions you’re especially looking forward to seeing?” Eren asked.Levi took a moment to think. Most of the time, he’d imagine a certain concept as Hange described it, and then be faced with something completely different by the time they completed it.“It’s hard to know what to expect, with Hange,” he muttered.Eren grinned. “I guess… Since I’ve been working on a few with them, I have a good idea where they’re headed. Or so they let me believe.” He huffed a laugh, that Levi saw rather than heard due to the wind in his ears. “Either way, I’d be happy to show you the projects as soon as they’re done. I know Hange won’t mind.”Levi only hummed in response.This didn’t deter Eren in the slightest, and Levi was always grateful for that. Eren carried on, talking about what some of his friends had been up to lately. Maybe if Levi joined in and spoke as animatedly, he wouldn’t run as high a risk of turning into a human icicle.He was satisfied just listening to Eren talk, however. He’d genuinely felt better about supervising the shifter once he’d stopped looking at him with all those stars in his eyes, once he stopped smiling tensely, and instead began grinning when he was excited, or openly frowning when he was displeased.It couldn’t be said that he ever stopped trying to impress Levi either, however.Levi wouldn’t have called that a problem, per se. Hell, Eren wasn’t the first.The problem was that he’d succeeded.Whenever Levi was asked to gather a team, the same name would always leap to the front of his mind. Eren was competent, and deserved his place on each mission he took part in. But, as much as he hated it, Levi had to acknowledge that he’d long stopped wondering who’d be best for a task at his side, so long as Eren would do.For quite some time, Levi believed he’d managed to keep his, ah, opinions, about Eren under wraps. But then, when did time ever play in anyone’s favor? Here, he let a concerned look escape him; there, he’d wordlessly handed Eren what he needed before he even had to ask; once or twice, he reacted to what was obviously an injury, only to find Eren had successfully kept it hidden from anyone else’s eyes.Maybe it wasn’t due to Levi’s accidental and clumsy encouragement, maybe it wasn’t his fault, but in any case, Eren, as far as Levi knew, had never turned to anyone else.Fuck his dignity, the air was biting at his cheeks and he couldn’t feel his feet anymore. Levi rubbed his hands together and took small steps from side to side.Eren’s speech faltered, and he shot a quick glance at Levi’s hands. Predictable.Levi knew he should tuck his hands back under his arms and glare at Eren until he carried on. Especially given the only reason he was leaving them out, other than making sure they hadn’t turned blue yet, was to see what Eren was going to try and do about it.If Eren had gloves on, no doubt he’d hand them over. Except Eren certainly wouldn’t be needing gloves in this early spring, he was always warmer than everyone else. His hands would be warm now. They’d probably be able to warm his own up very fast –He snapped his hands back under his arms, and let shame wash over him. He’d wanted to compare what Eren would do to what Levi guessed he would. In short, he’d wanted to check just how well he knew Eren – possibly not for the first time.He’d wanted to confirm, for the millionth time, whether or not he truly knew Eren all that well.As if he wanted prove to himself that just maybe, he’d been misreading him from the start.He must have been.No one should care about him that much.Though it was downright hypocritical of him to point at the gaps between what Eren should feel and how he did feel.Eren cut through his inner chastising. “Sir, you know, what you said about Hange earlier… We’re lucky to have you too. I, uh. Hope you do know that,” Eren said, coming closer, but looking away.“Hah.” Levi couldn’t help but frown.He had been able to focus on his job rather than on Eren… as long as his job had been worth focusing on. But one day it had all been over. Relief like never before, greater than leaving the underground, or even the walls for the first time, had swept over him.But so had a vague sense of emptiness, of restlessness, of… what now? Which was perfectly acceptable in younger soldiers; less acceptable coming from a man who could have retired. People sought vitality and strength for expansion and reconstruction.And people hadn’t turned to him.Younger soldiers were favored. The older survivors were expected to take up a desk job in the administration, jobs that were entirely unsuitable for both Hange and Levi. And no matter what Hange would assign Levi to, he often though that his role had become purely decorative: his added-value laid in the morale he brought with his presence, more than in any material contribution he could bring.And so maybe he’d grown bored. His mind was left idle enough to think about Eren. He was free to watch Eren come into his own as a respected member of both the military and of the community. Free to watch him learn to lead, and learn to listen with more patience than his younger self ever had. He’d grown, and he’d done so so beautifully.Levi sighed. Maybe he was bored. Maybe he was tired.Regardless, he would have found it difficult to stop looking at Eren Jaeger.Surrendering to that notion now was inevitable, when he suddenly realized Eren’s mere presence had practically distracted him from the way the wind lashed at his face. Come to think of it, though, Eren probably had been talking for that purpose exactly. Somewhere along the way, Eren had learned how deeply Levi loathed the atmosphere when it turned the tips of his nose and ears red.Levi supposed he should be grateful that Eren had chosen to deal with this current discomfort of his reasonably. It was well known among their friends that anything that displeased Levi came under Eren’s attack sooner or later. Simply distracting Levi was one of his better solutions.“Is… something wrong, Sir?” Eren asked hesitantly, head tilted to the side.Levi was about to make a biting comment about the wind – the way he’d been sinking his head into his shoulders having most likely prompted the question – but his reply died in his throat.The sun had begun its journey back down towards the horizon, sinking down into the ocean, far beyond where Eren stood. When Levi turned to glance at him, the sunlight caught on his eyes.And that was that, Humanity’s Strongest silenced by the world’s most dazzling pair of eyes.Good thing he was free to retire.He probably looked like he was glaring (so long as his jaw didn’t drop – it didn’t, did it?), but god dammit he was going to keep staring until he’d counted all the different shades of green he could see there. Except the sun rays caused Eren’s eyes to shimmer, so the shades kept shifting (which was rather hypnotizing), so naturally he’d have to start over endlessly. And if by some miracle all the different hues and hints of green did end up counted for, well then he’d move on to the golds.God those eyes were gorgeous, and it was simply unfair.He’d once believed that being able to see all the pastels of a sunset was lucky, and his friends’ reactions to the ocean forced him to acknowledge the magic of the dark (murky) waters. But nature’s most exquisite palettes could never make him feel what he was feeling now, a wild mix of giddiness, wonder and awe.When he finally tore his gaze away from Eren’s eyes, they would roam no further than across the rest of Eren’s face. The cold air brought color to his well-defined cheekbones, his hair was adorably messed up, and a smile was tugging at the corner of those pink lips –Wait. Was he laughing at Levi? Surely his reaction wasn’t all that strange, no one should look that good in this stupid wind. And he looked so relaxed while he did it too, Levi had been braced for what felt like ages now against the cold, Eren simply stood sturdy, smiling, by his side. Ridiculous.Suddenly, Eren’s eyes went wide, and the sunlight made them sparkle more than ever, and Levi’s breath caught – and then Eren ducked out of the way, grimacing.Levi’s heart froze.He knew it, he had been misreading all along, and regardless he’d always been told he had the creepiest stare, of course he wouldn’t care until it was too late –“I’m so sorry!” Eren apologized, but looked thoroughly amused after a moment. “I should have realized sooner! It’s freezing out here but I completely failed to notice!”What? Levi had better understand soon because this was going to provide his only possible excuse for the staring.“The sun must be setting faster than expected, I didn’t stand right where I’d be blocking you off from sunlight on purpose,” he laughed, finding the idea amusing perhaps, but more importantly, at ease. “Anyway, I hope it’s a bit better like this?” He’d taken a step back, letting the sun hit Levi square in the face instead.No, no it most certainly was not better, but how could he say that?Levi’s imminent stammering of “it’s fine” was cut off by unexpected shivering. For fuck’s sake. The cold had finally overcome his resistance.“Guess not,” Eren chuckled. Of course he’d notice. “Do you want us to climb down? Closer to shore. We might be able to find some shelter there.”Levi knew that would have been a reasonable decision. But he threw an uneasy look over his shoulder, to where their horses were loosely tied to the trees.“We’ll climb down when the ship will be in sight,” he replied.Eren followed his gaze. Then he smiled. “As you wish.”The smile froze for a moment. Undetectably, but at this point, Levi wasn’t going to deny he’d been watching closely. Levi was wondering when he’d last heard Eren acquiesce to anything requested by anyone else so easily, when Eren turned to face him fully.A position suggesting far more confidence than the current expression on his face.“Since we can’t bring you to shelter…” Eren’s voice wavered as Levi’s eyes narrowed, but he soldiered on, “maybe we can bring shelter to you?”He would have (should have) scoffed, but the air was cut off from his throat as his heart slammed up against it. Eren’s smile, more timid than he had seen in years, was innocent; the look he was giving Levi was not.Moving was impossible, his feet were rooted to the ground, eyes trained on Eren as the young man walked up to him, and stepped behind him. Levi thought his frozen expression would appear threatening. To Eren, he had to assume it appeared wary, at worst.In any case, it failed to discourage Eren from gently wrapping his own cloak around Levi, from softly holding it in place by pressing against his back and loosely wrapping his arms around him. Whatever apprehension Levi might have had quickly melted away. Almost literally, in fact, fading fast under the influence of Eren’s overpowering body heat.Completely rationally speaking, this was an excellent option right now. Since, objectively, this was a perfectly proportional solution to his temperature problem, it was perfectly reasonable and acceptable for Levi to relax against Eren. Hah. That was probably more or less exactly what Eren was thinking in that moment too.At least Eren had the presence of mind to keep talking, though it might have been in hope that if he behaved normally, Levi would feel less self-conscious. Yep, sounded like Eren. From where he stood, all wrapped up, it even smelled and felt like Eren, and that was so much more than he deserved.“It’ll be really nice to be back home with everyone tonight,” Eren said. “Can’t wait for all the stories that won’t be going into official reports, over dinner. They’ll probably try and make us regret not going, no matter how miserable they probably actually felt out there sometimes.” Eren paused. Then, “Hey… are you considering going on another expedition in the future?”This time Levi did scoff. “At my age? Don’t be ridiculous.”Eren’s huff blew against his hair, warm air contrasting with the air all around them.“I don’t think your age could stop you from doing much. And honestly? I definitely don’t think it’d be ridiculous for you to do anything.”Levi knew Eren was smiling behind him. It made him smile too, a quiet smile, that didn’t fade as Eren’s arms ever slightly tightened around him. Neither moved or said anything more until white sails appeared on the horizon. As they rushed down to the shore, Levi let Eren pull ahead, letting himself think for a moment.When he took off again, he’d decided he was also excited to get back home.The cold still bit his fingertips, and the wind still whipped at his cheekbones. The cold still crawled under his tightly knotted cravat, still tore through his over-worn cloak.But looking back, maybe coming out into this cold hadn’t been all that ridiculous after all.
|
10566882
|
Just Give Me a Reason
|
{
"Archive Warning": "Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings",
"Category": null,
"Characters": "Harry Styles, Louis Tomlinson, Niall Horan, Liam Payne, Zayn Malik, Anne Cox (mentioned), Simon Cowell (mentioned), Gemma Styles (Mentioned), Minor Characters",
"Fandom": "One Direction (Band)",
"Language": "English",
"Rating": "Teen And Up Audiences",
"author": "by Mr_Stylinson",
"chapters": "1/1",
"completed": "",
"published": "2017-04-08T00:00:00",
"words": "6,105",
"Additional Tags": "Angst, Cyberbullying, Twitter, Social Media, Insecure Harry, Protective Louis, Protective Zayn, Protective Liam, Protective Niall, Anxiety Attacks, Cuddling & Snuggling, Brotherly Love, Harry-centric, 2011, Self-Doubt, Hurt/Comfort, Minor Harry Styles/Louis Tomlinson, OT5 Friendship, Red or Black, Fetus Direction, What Makes You Beautiful by One Direction",
"Relationship": null,
"Character": null,
"Relationships": "Niall Horan & Zayn Malik & Liam Payne & Harry Styles & Louis Tomlinson, Harry Styles/Louis Tomlinson",
"Series": null,
"Collections": null,
"Fandoms": null,
"Archive Warnings": null,
"Categories": "Gen, M/M",
"Bookmarks": null,
"Chapters": null,
"Comments": null,
"Completed": null,
"Hits": null,
"Kudos": null,
"Published": null,
"Words": null,
"Updated": null
}
|
“Harry, please stop doing this to yourself.”“I'm sorry, Ni, but I just can't. I have to know why.”Harry had lost count how many times he'd been begged to stay off of Twitter, or at least stay away from that dreaded comment thread, but he couldn't help it. He was so drawn to it, like an insect to a bug zapper, which was an ironically fitting way to describe it. Part of him knew that he was doing more harm than good by scrolling through all those comments regarding the band's most recent performance, but his curiosity was too strong to ignore it. It was on his mind constantly. It left a question in his head that he didn't think he could live without knowing the answer to, and with thousands of comments at the ready for his bloodshot eyes to scan over, surely he would find what he was looking for in there somewhere.If someone were to say that they hated his singing, that was tolerable. Harry could easily handle that sort of criticism. In fact, he often welcomed it on many occasions. It was something he could always as leverage to work to improve himself.But if all that someone says is “I hate you.”, that's just a broad statement with no immediate reasoning behind it, but with a very prominent impact. And it had millions of possible conclusions, it drove him crazy not knowing precisely which one it is. Was it the way he dressed? The way he looked? He ran as many excuses as he could think of through his brain, but the logical part of him always landed on the likelihood that the comments are referring to him as an individual, and nothing more.If someone says that they dislike a certain attribute of yours, you can usually do something about it, though some things are not easily changed. However, when someone says that they dislike you personally and leave it at that, Harry was desperate for a reason why they would feel that way towards him.And so he continues to indulge in the poison known as That Comment Thread on Twitter, finding a positive comment periodically, but those weren't what he was looking for, he was searching relentlessly for a comment that offered any explanation at all as to why people hated him. He refused to settle with a simple “I hate you.”, there just had to be a reason behind the use of those words.For a while, the rest of the band let him be as he read through the horrible comments. They even read a few themselves just to get an idea on what was being said about their youngest member, but they could only do so for so long. The material was so awful that they worried for Harry's sanity if they allowed him to continue reading them much longer. They knew he wanted nothing more right now than some closure, but from what they had all seen within that comment thread, they doubted that anything of that nature would ever be found.It was starting to affect Harry's sleep, he would lie in bed, unable to rest, his yearning for an explanation, even just a slight hint, as to why people held such harsh feelings towards him always swirling around in his head. He would be the only one in the morning with bags under his eyes, which vibrant green color was now dark and dull. Yawning constantly throughout the day, often looking like he was going drop his face right onto his dinner plate and fall asleep right there. And yet, if there was an opportunity, he would always have the energy to pull out his phone and resume his futile search.They knew it was only a matter of time before fans and media outlets alike would notice the deterioration of Harry, and that would only result in a downward spiral from there. Harry's emotional state right now is rather fragile, and the last thing he needed was the rest of the world pestering him, adding more weight to his already burdened shoulders. It was bad enough when they learned that they were scheduled to perform their debut single live yet again, this time on the Late Late Show in the upcoming month of November, which means they have just two months to recollect themselves before showing their faces to millions of people once more.Of course, Louis, Zayn, Liam, and Niall weren't concerned about themselves in the slightest, all they were worried about was Harry. To most people, two months should be more than enough time to grieve, but they just were not sure. It has been a week already since their Red and Black show, yet Harry still remained glued to that damn comment thread whenever he had the chance. It was starting to get out of hand, as if his sleep deprivation wasn't enough. If they were at a restaurant, Harry would either sit a menu upright on the table or set his phone his lap, trying to conceal himself even when the others knew exactly what he was doing. If they were seeing a movie, one of them would have to remind him to keep his phone off, lest he get kicked out of the theater. If the five of them were simply hanging out together, Harry always made the least noise as he sat wherever, silently swiping his thumb vertically across the screen of his phone, still on a fruitless hunt for something he will never quite find.They had all tried to reassure him, but it never seemed to work. All those hateful comments about him were engraved into his mind, it was like he was no longer capable of acknowledging his positives, and it ached his bandmates seeing him like this.They know Harry, he is one of the kindest, most caring individuals they have the pleasure of calling their friend. The boy didn't have a bad bone in his body, and to think that people could say such terrible things about him was beyond upsetting. Liam still distinctively recalls having to calm Zayn down after he'd nearly punched a hole in the wall of their hotel room, while trying hard not to do the same himself.Niall tried his best to make Harry laugh, the ever-beaming ball of sunshine that the Irishman was, but he couldn't get him to crack. Not even Louis, who was undeniably the closest to Harry than the rest of them, had been successful in bringing back the cheery bundle of curls they all missed.They didn't give up just yet, their attempts to intervene became more drastic.It didn't take long for Harry to realize that while he'd been in the shower, someone had taken his phone, which was still logged into his Twitter account, changed his password and logged him off. He had his suspicions as to who was responsible, but he refrained from expressing them to anyone. The tactic, whosever idea it was, didn't last, as he was able to regain access using the password retrieval feature. He made sure to limit his phone usage around the other boys in order to not give them a clue as to what he was still doing. His desperation to solve that mystery was as strong as ever, he'd resorted to making up an excuse to go off somewhere so he could freely read through the Twitter comments without someone inquiring about what he was doing, then telling him to stop. The comments had only increased in numbers during his involuntary “break”, which only drove his motivation to keep reading them.However, the excuse of “I need to call my mum”, which was indeed something he tried to do at least once a day, only worked twice. After the second time he'd hid away somewhere using that ploy, Louis had called Anne on his phone, since he had her number, as well as the parents of the other three boys, and likewise, they all had the contact information of each others families. He was surprised when Anne had picked up, and It soon dawned on Louis that her son was in fact not having a conversation with his mother over the phone like he'd originally thought. After saying goodbye, Louis stormed over to where he'd last seen Harry disappear around the corner. He spotted the boy quietly sitting on the pavement beside a dumpster, face buried in the screen and clearly not on any phone call.Harry was too engrossed to notice Louis stomping over to him, and before he knew it, his phone was ripped from his fingers. He shot his head up at the thief, his expression turning into a mix of shock and fear as he met the glare of a very disappointed Louis.Louis took a short glance at the device in his grip, and surprise, surprise, Twitter was open, negative comments popping in by the second, moving older ones downward. Can't these people just let it go already? He looked down at Harry, who was still cowering slightly under Louis' disapproving stare, his head bowed in shame, obviously waiting for the reprimanding he knew he deserved. Louis did want to yell at Harry for his tardiness, but he knew that that wouldn't be the wisest course of action, and it would only hurt his friend even more, as well as himself. Instead, he shut his eyes and sighed heavily, calming his nerves.“You can't keep doing this to yourself, Harry. It's going to wreck you.”Harry nodded then sniffled as tears slowly cascaded down his face. “I know, but, I just want to find out...”“Find out what?” Louis questioned, even though he already knew the answer to that question.“Why do people hate me?”“Harry, they don't hate you.” Louis insisted, he leaned over and gently wiping away Harry's tears with his thumb.“How do you know? They said so themselves.”“And have any of them explained why?” Louis raised an eyebrow.“Well, no, I'm still trying to figure that out.” Harry said as he stared at his phone which was still in Louis' hand.“Harry, please listen to me.” Louis rubbed his forehead. “These random arseholes, they don't deserve all this attention you've been giving them. They're never going to give you a reason. And them saying that they hate you doesn't mean anything. They don't know you, and they cannot accurately talk about you like that. Besides, there are plenty more people who rooting for you, and who care about you. Fuck what those people on Twitter are saying.”“But,” Harry argued. “Surely there's got to be a reason in there somewhere, there just has to be.”A ghost of a smile formed on Louis' face. “Harry, you're gonna be fat and old before you find it, so it's just as well that you drop it and leave those sorry bastards to their own miserable lives.” He stuck out a hand to the younger man who was still sitting on the ground. “Now come along, let's enjoy the rest of this beautiful day, yeah?”Harry knew he wasn't going to win this argument, but he also knew that Louis was very much correct. Mentally waving a white flag, he sighed. “All right.” He accepted Louis' aid and pulled himself to his feet. Louis' smile grew as he wrapped an arm around the curly-haired lad and they strolled together Harry gazed longingly at his phone, which was still in Louis' grasp.“Can I have my phone back, please?”Louis looked at him before stuffing the phone into the pocket of his red trousers, patting at the rectangular bulge. “Sorry, love, but I gotta say no this time.” Harry pouted but chose not to negotiate. Louis chuckled and playfully ruffled the younger boy's hair. The edge's of Harry's mouth made the tiniest movement upward, and a feeling of satisfaction washed over Louis as they continued off into the surprisingly sunny day.Louis spoke with the other lads and sometime later in the evening, the five of them went to a nearby Nando's. For the first time in what feels like forever, Harry is talkative, he made his usual lame jokes, he didn't try to conceal himself, considering Louis was still holding his phone captive, but he never asked for it once since earlier in the day. The other boys were very glad to see their baby brother happy for a change, and it confirmed their suspicions that reading through that God-awful Twitter thread was draining him, and him being forced to go on through the day, even just a few hours, without having to read some random twat telling him to kill himself was certainly making a difference.While Niall had Zayn and Harry occupied with some story, Liam leaned over and whispered. “Well done, Louis.”“Thanks.” Louis beamed. “I'm just really glad to see the boy perking up finally. Should have just taken his phone away in the first place.”While it might've seemed like an impossibly short amount of time, the boys were nearly convinced that they finally had the old Harry back, it was almost like the past several days never happened. The color In his eyes was returning, he no longer looked like a zombie, or like he would burst into tears any second. And the solution couldn't have been any more simple: keep Harry off of Twitter, although it required a little more effort than just trying to convince him that he wasn't doing himself any favors by allowing other peoples' cruel words to fill his conscience, it's not like forcefully keeping his phone away from him was a difficult task or anything. The poor boy didn't need to keep reading all those despicable things about him either way. At least he hasn't been willing to protest, because they all knew that Harry was aware of the damage he was inflicting upon himself, and it seemed like all it really took was his bandmates to step in to put in end to it. After all, they are all Harry's big brothers, it is their job to protect him, and they are more than willing to do so, by any means necessary.“How you doing, Haz?” Louis asked.“I'm doing lovely, thank you.” Harry answered, a happy smile plastered on his features, which was quite contagious concerning the rest of the boys.“That's wonderful to hear, Harry.” Zayn reach over and squeezed his shoulder, then Niall leaned over and wrapped his arms around the younger singer.“Oh, I'm so glad you're feeling better, mate. We all are.”“That's right.” Liam confirmed with a nod. “Nobody's gonna be hurting our Harry, not under our watch.”Harry sighed with content. He was truly lucky to have these boys in his life, and even after the way he acted during the previous week, they didn't give up and turn away, they kept on fighting for him. By now, he was feeling a little silly for getting so worked up over a few nasty comments. How could he ever allow himself to let them affect him so much when he's still got his mum, sister, the boys, and many more adoring fans? They were all the ones who really mattered. And what about those haters on Twitter? What are they gonna do? Tell him to jump off a cliff? If Harry had a pound for every time he'd read a comment like that...“Guys, I'm really sorry about the past week, you all tried to help me, but I didn't listen.” Harry offered as he looked down at the table.“Don't worry about it, Harry.” Niall suggested, patting his shoulder. “We still love you, and nothing's ever gonna change that.”“And millions of people around the world feel the same way.” Zayn reassured.Harry's smile never faltered. “Thanks, lads. It really means a lot.”Louis briefly tapped his chin in thought. “Hey, why don't we all go to mine and Harry's flat and watch movies and eat junk?”Niall eagerly cried out in agreement, he stood up from his seat and clapped once. “Yeah! Let's do it!”“But we just ate.” Liam protested.Before they knew it, they were hurrying from their table to catch up with the blonde boy, carefully maneuvering around other patrons, but Niall skidded to a stop at the door, his excitement had now vanished. “Um, we have a situation.”The others looked through the glass and took in the numerous vehicles and dozens of people crowding in the parking lot. Endless bright flashes had already began to assault their vision along with the sound of cameras clicking.“It's the bloody paps.” Louis noted.“How did they know we were here?” Zayn wondered.“Somebody must have tipped them off.” Liam scanned around the restaurant, as if spotting the potential suspect would change their current situation.“They're not going to go away anytime soon. So, let's just do what we usually do.” Harry proposed. Reluctantly, the group exited the building and made their way into the herd. Question after question was thrown their way and microphones were shoved into their faces. This would have been semi tolerable, except for one thing.“Harry, Harry Styles!” Some random bloke called out. “Is it true that you lip-sync?”“Are you planning on quitting One Direction?” A woman asked.“What are your thoughts on Twitter's ongoing reaction to your performance last week?”“No, nononono...” Harry now regretted his decision to just face the mob. He felt his chest tighten as he struggled to breath steadily, he clenched his fists and held them over his torso, the flashing of the cameras emphasizing his growing dizziness as he shut his eyes and shook his head, repeating “no” to himself. Sounds became muffled, the horrendous words from all those comments he had read played aloud in his mind. He choked back a sob, failing to prevent the tears welled up beneath his eyelids from pouring out down his cheeks, for all these people to see. By now he was lost in his own hell, completely unaware of four older boys who were fretting over him.“Harry's having a panic attack.” Zayn urged. “We need to get him out of here. Now.” He and Louis positioned themselves in front of the trembling figure while Niall and Liam swept from behind. They all surrounded Harry and acted as a walking shield as they pushed their way through the crowd of obnoxious reporters and journalists and their blasphemous questions.“Excuse me, Mr. Styles!” An individual attempted to force their way between Liam and Louis in order to get to Harry, who immediately whimpered and shrunk away from the unwanted presence. “Is it true the band is threatening to kick you out over your performance?”“Piss off!” Louis yelled at the rude woman. She took a couple steps back and looked genuinely shocked. Louis didn't pass her a second glance as he pushed more people out of the way. He wasn't concerned in the slightest about what would show up on the tabloids in the morning regarding his outburst, getting Harry to safety was all that mattered right now. Another man tried to slip a microphone through a crack in their makeshift shield, but Zayn took one hand and smacked it away, the object fell out of the man's grip and onto the ground. Liam mustered the most threatening glare he could, trying to silently give the message that they were not interested in speaking with anyone. Niall leaned forward to Harry's right ear and tried to keep the curly-haired lad calm.“Just keep listening to my voice, yeah? You're doing good, Haz. We're almost to the car, just keep walking. You're okay, we're all here for you. That's it, that's it. We're almost there.”Finally, the waiting car was in sight as they trudged through the last of the crowd. No sooner had the last of them piled into the car, Louis told their driver “Get us the hell out of here.” The driver nodded and inched the vehicle forward. People tried futilely to snap more pictures through the tinted windows as they drove away.Harry buried his face into Louis' chest, Niall reached over Louis and continued to massage Harry's shoulder while Zayn rubbed the younger singer's back.Liam exhaled as he relaxed into the seat. “Are you all right, Harry?”Harry emitted a whine, keeping his place on Louis. “I just want to go home.”The driver felt like if he could actually hear the collective sound of four hearts breaking in response to the boy, (or was that his own?). He did hear Louis whisper reassuring words to Harry as they drove to their flat. When they got there, he announced their arrival and the five young men climbed out of the car and walked tiredly to Harry's and Louis' abode.Harry collapsed on the sofa, he leaned back and rested his head against the cushion. Louis sat to his left, an arm draped over his shoulders. Niall sat to Harry's right, Liam settled on the armrest next to Niall, and Zayn took a pillow and sat on the coffee table, facing Harry with an expression of concern.Harry groaned and rubbed his face, he was beyond exhausted after the ordeal outside of Nando's, and he could only imagine how people were probably reacting, seeing him cry like a baby, since there were likely hundreds of photos circulating the internet right this moment. Part of him wanted to look and see if his suspicions were true, but Louis still had his phone, and in Harry's current state, there was no way he could convince Louis to hand it over, and even if he did, one of the other lads would certainly intervene.Then it occurred to him, he'd been trying for so long to find a reason, any reason, as to why people hated him, and yet maybe the answer has been there the whole time. He pictured how he probably looked in front the cameras, his face wet with tears as he hid behind his bandmates like a coward. That must be why people don't like him. Who would be a fan of a 17-year old crybaby? He was weak, he relied on the other boys to hold him together, and he wondered if they secretly got tired of it. While there has been no indication that the rest of them were tired of babysitting him, a feeling of doubt still lingered within, not that it was a new feeling or anything, especially with how he felt while reading through that comment thread for so many hours during the past week. And just when things were improving, all those people show up, asking him things that he should have been able to answer, but couldn't. He mentally kicked himself for looking so pathetic in front of that crowd, and he predicted that it would only add fuel to the fire that never seemed to die ever since that performance.As he began to imagine what people might be saying about him right this very moment, his eyes got warm again. He tried furiously to wipe away the new stream of tears, and of course, all of the boys noticed and they drew in closer. It wasn't that Harry minded their company, he was very much glad to have them all near him, but he felt bad, because they could all be doing something a lot more fun than watching over weak little Harry, and even if they said they were fine, he wasn't completely convinced, and he would never blame them if they actually felt differently.His mind fell onto one of the questions he was asked back outside of Nando's. Are you planning on quitting One Direction?Quit? No. God, no! He could never do that, the mere thought hadn't even crossed his mind. What made someone even asked such a thing? Perhaps there were rumors floating around from some news site that Harry couldn't care less about. And yet, here he sat, trying to visualize what it would be like if he'd thrown in the towel after getting eliminated from The X-Factor, had he not been willing to join the group of losing contestants that Simon Cowell had put together that would eventually become one of the world's most popular boybands, had he put his singing dreams on a back burner and aimed for a simpler, more practical future.Nothing sounded satisfying, he just could not imagine life without Niall, Zayn, Liam, and most of all, Louis, he simply could not. But as he dwelled over all those comments “I hate you”, he began to seriously doubt his place as an international popstar. People in this field deal with these things all the time, and despite it all, they are able to continue on with their lives and careers, with supporting family, friends, and fans alike, which Harry definitely had, but there still seemed to be an empty space inside him, one that the cruel people from that Twitter thread managed to create, and no amount of reassurance or support seemed to fill it back up.It was a cruel set of circumstances. Harry had everything he needed, but he still allowed a bunch of random dickheads on a social media site take control of his confidence and self-esteem. This shouldn't be happening, he should be able to laugh it off and move on, just like how everybody else is able to do, but he couldn't. The agonizing question “Why do people hate me?” was always there, nearly all the time. The people who were close to him would remind him that he is a worthwhile individual, and he shouldn't get worked up about some bad comments on the internet. He couldn't help it, there wasn't much of an alternative way to describe it. If someone says they don't like him, he must know why, he didn't care about what the reason was, just so long as there was a reason to begin with, and he firmly believed that no matter what anyone said, there was always a reason behind it, always.In his own mind, this was a weakness for someone in his position, but he's only human, being “famous” didn't change the fact that words still had quite an impact on him. As much as he strives to be like the people who didn't care that much about what other people said about them, chances are high that he will never truly be that type of person.Once again, he pondered if he was honestly cut out for this life. If he can be so easily affected by other peoples' remarks towards him, maybe it would ultimately be the best course of action to reconsider his future. He despised the idea of letting the boys down, and just when he felt that perhaps he's simply not thinking straight, those blasted comments would invade his head, reminding him over and over again why dropping out of his music career could even possibly be worth considering.It wouldn't be as easy as saying “I quit”, but truth be told, he felt that he could handle it. As much as he loved singing, especially with his brothers, he had thought through this long-term, he couldn't imagine himself lasting much longer if his stance on negative comments were to remain the same. Even with so much support, he wasn't sure if he would last another two years, if that. So many thoughts ran through his mind by now, the reaction of the boys if he were to actually call it quits and ditch the band, or the reaction of the haters, cheering as they successfully drove away a rising star from a life of fame, or worse yet, them mocking him even further. Even if he were return to the life as an average Joe, many people would still recognize him as Harry Styles from One Direction, his current fame would stick with him for a long time, and he wasn't quite sure if that would necessarily be a good thing. Because then people might see him as the way he fears that they do currently, weak. But surely they would lose interest sooner than later, they would eventually find someone else to go after and forget all about him.He thought about his mum and his sister, Gemma. He missed them and It certainly would be nice to see them more often. He stopped his train of thought there and started weighing in on his options. He could stay in the band and continue to live his passion, while also being reduced to a sobbing mess whenever some twat says something mean about him. He could give up on his dream that was finally in his grasp, and hopefully get away from the scrutiny of the internet community, but then he would be letting his brothers down, and he wasn't sure if he could live with himself knowing that he would be the sole cause of One Direction's downfall. But would it be any different either way? Again, he couldn't be certain that he would last for very long if he continued to be as sensitive as he was when it comes to Twitter threads, it almost seemed like one of those 'damned if you do, damned if you don't' situations.And that was when Harry finally broke the silence that had filled the apartment, he cleared his throat, grabbing everyone's attention, and as expected, he was met with four shocked gazes once the words rolled out of his mouth.“I'm think I should quit the band.”After another long pause with mouths hanging open, Niall was the first to speak.“No,” The blonde said quietly. “Harry, no, you can't.”“I'm sorry.” Harry sniffled, his voice sounding more and more croaked. “I just don't think I can keep doing this. I'm afraid if I stick around much more, it's going to hurt the band.”“Bullshit.” Louis argued. “Harry, listen to yourself, that's not you talking, it's all those bastards online.”“Louis is right.” Liam said. “Harry, this seems like a very hasty decision. I really think you should take some more time to think it through.”“I haven't made up my mind just yet.” Harry defended. “What I'm saying is that I'm taking it into consideration.” He sighed and stared at his lap. “I'm sorry I'm such a baby.”“Harry, you're not.” Zayn insisted. “All those people can say whatever they want, it will never change who you really are, because you know yourself better than any of those people could ever wish to.”“I just don't know.” Harry finally said. “I wish I wasn't bothered so much by what people are saying about me, but I just am. That's part of who I am, and I wish I could change that, but I can't. I worry way too much about not being good enough, or how other people feel about me. It's tiring, and I just want to not think about it anymore.” He let out a shaky breath. “That's why I think it would be best if I left One Direction. I'll only slow you guys down.”The older boys all wanted to counter what they'd just heard, they didn't believe any of it, they refused to. But seeing Harry in his current condition managed to drain all the arguments they had left in them. Harry winced as he took in the looks of defeat and sadness on everyone else's features. He knew that they weren't doing it on purpose and that they still cared. This was confirmed when Liam spoke up again.“Whatever you do decide, Harry, we'll support you no matter what. Please, always remember that.”Harry swallowed a lump in his throat. “Thanks, Liam. It really means a lot to me.” Soon, the silence returned with a vengeance, you could practicality hear a pin drop on the floor. Everyone remained where they were seated, either examining an interesting spot on the wall or twiddling their fingers. Harry noticed the awkwardness and tried to alleviate it.“Um, if you guys would rather do something, it's okay. You don't have to sit around here.”“Would you like for us to leave?” Zayn asked.“No, no.” Harry quickly affirmed. “I'm really glad you're all here, it's just that I don't want you to feel like you have to stick around if you don't want to.”“Not a chance.” Niall stated. “If... if this might be one of the last times we get to spend together as One Direction, then I wanna spend it with you, Harry.”“I second that.” Liam said.“Same here.” Zayn added.“You know me, love, I'm staying right here.” Louis leaned over and kissed Harry's cheek. Harry smiled sadly before yawning.“I'm really tired.” His eyelids were growing heavy.An imaginary lightbulb popped above Louis' head, he reached over and grabbed the large duvet that was on the armrest next to him. He draped it over himself and Harry before tossing the other end over to Liam. Niall scooted closer to Harry to allow Liam some room on the seat, Louis did the same for Zayn, who hopped up from his spot on the table and squeezed himself between Louis and the other armrest. Harry sighed with content with having his best mates all next to him, he snuggled into the blanket, comfortably wedged between Louis and Niall.“May we sing to you, Harry?” Louis asked softly.Harry only nodded as he blinked tiredly. A familiar soothing tune emitted from Louis' lips, and as the words began, the other three boys quickly caught on and gradually joined in.You are our sunshine, our only sunshine. Louis brought his face against Harry's before planting another gentle kiss on the younger boy's cheek.You make us happy when skies are gray. Liam reached around Niall and massaged his fingers through Harry's soft curls.You'll never know, Haz, how much we love you. Niall tilted his head and nuzzled into the crook of Harry's neck.Please don't take our sunshine away. Zayn finished by taking Harry's left hand and cupping it between both of his.Harry's tired eyes slowly lifted open and his bottom lip quivered. He tried to hold back a sob threatening to escape for what it was worth, but he lost the battle and soon the others were looking at him with concern again. Harry gave in and let his emotions flow freely. He quickly wiped away his tears and brought his arms up to pull in the four boys with hopes that it would get them to stop apologizing for making him cry.“Shit, Harry, we didn't mean to make you feel bad.” Louis stammered. Harry effectively cut him off by bringing their lips together.“Don't worry, you didn't.” He chuckled in spite of the tears still forming and falling. “I'd like to think of it as a much needed reminder about where I belong in this world.”“And where is that?” Zayn asked curiously.“With all of you lads.” Harry answered before turning his head to the left. "Especially Louis." The older boy grinned.“Wait,” Niall piped in. “So, does that mean that you're...” His hopes were on the rise.“Well, I've figured that no matter what happens or what anyone says, we will always be together. Nothing can truly keep us apart... Not even distance.”“Oh.” And then his hopes dropped.“And our offer still stands,” Liam reminded. “We will always support you, Harry, even if you feel that it's best to leave.”“Good, I'm glad.” Harry sighed. “Because I think I have finally made up my mind.”“Yeah? And what answer is swirling around in your curly little head?” Louis pried.Harry smiled as he looked at each of his bandmates.“I'm not quitting the band.”The distinctive sound of a phone vibrating was heard and everyone froze. Louis reached down and removed Harry's phone that was still in the pocket of his trousers. He glared at a notification from Twitter beaming at the top of the screen. He shot a sly look at Harry, while exchanging a knowing glace with the others.“I'll buy you a new one.” Louis suddenly promised before tossing the device over his shoulder. Harry cringed as a brief but loud cracking noise rang out from behind the couch.The murdered cell phone was soon forgotten as Louis, Niall, Liam, and Zayn resumed cuddling their beloved baby brother.
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10516569
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Shou Quan Fan Yi Rouge a
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{
"Archive Warning": "No Archive Warnings Apply",
"Category": "M/M",
"Characters": "Katsuki Yuuri, Victor Nikiforov, Nishigori Yuuko, Nishigori Takeshi",
"Fandom": "Yuri!!! on Ice (Anime)",
"Language": "中文-普通话 國語",
"Rating": "Not Rated",
"author": "by inoripooh",
"chapters": "1/1",
"completed": "",
"published": "2017-04-01T00:00:00",
"words": "5,176",
"Additional Tags": "Bullying, Canon Universe, yuuri wears makeup, and he's gorgeous, and anyone who says otherwise can fight me, Homophobic Slurs, Fluff, Growing Up, Panic Attacks, Anxiety, Translation, 中文翻譯",
"Relationship": "Katsuki Yuuri/Victor Nikiforov",
"Character": null,
"Relationships": null,
"Series": null,
"Collections": null,
"Fandoms": null,
"Archive Warnings": null,
"Categories": null,
"Bookmarks": null,
"Chapters": null,
"Comments": null,
"Completed": null,
"Hits": null,
"Kudos": null,
"Published": null,
"Words": null,
"Updated": null
}
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那天，是勇利第一次化妝，也是他第一次挨揍。他走路去上學，步伐輕快，因為吃早餐的時候媽媽說他很漂亮，爸爸捏捏他的臉頰，真利說他看起來像個小公主。不過他踏進學校的第一步，就馬上知道不是每個人都抱持著跟他家人一樣的看法。 起先那些目光還好。當然，勇利覺得自己的掌心變得濕答答的。也當然，他有點發抖，覺得有點焦慮。但是真利跟他說過別人不管怎樣都會看的，所以他還是頂著那些眼光大步向前。走路的時候試著不要彎腰駝背、遮遮掩掩，打算走進教室，那兒會稍稍隱蔽些。 「勇利！」優子跑過來，使勁抱住他。勇利哀叫，豪在一邊大笑，猛拍他的背。「你看起來好漂亮噢，」優子讚美道，親暱地拍拍勇利的臉蛋。 這消解了一些勇利先前的遲疑，覺得或許他化妝是沒關係的。他覺得自己看起來很漂亮，優子也覺得他看起來很漂亮，所以真的，這不該有問題的，對吧？ 不過接著豪就張開他那大笨嘴說，「為什麼你要像個姑娘一樣化妝啊？」而他說起「姑娘」好像那是件壞事。這讓勇利想不明白，因為至少就他所知，豪還是喜歡優子的，而優子，事實上就是個姑娘。 「豪！」優子斥責，往他肩上甩了一巴掌。「勇利想化妝就化妝。你只是嫉妒他比你還漂亮！」 勇利嘆氣，雖然他既惶恐又害怕，還是嘗試發出聲音說話，因為他知道他們又要吵架了。 「但是只有死玻璃會化妝，」豪眨眨眼，勇利的心臟直直下墜。 勇利或許不知道多少不好的話，但他知道死玻璃是什麼，他還知道那感覺上是一種不好的事情。臉紅了起來，勇利的目光垂向他的腳。一部份是因為困窘，一部份是因為低下頭比抬起頭更簡單。他縮縮腳趾，雙手抓住褲子，努力不要哭出來，因為那絕對會讓事情變得比現在糟糕十倍。 「豪！」優子又吼了一次，這次更嚴厲了。「身為同志又沒有錯。」 張著嘴，豪氣喘吁吁。「但我爸說——」 「我聽你爸在放屁。」 優子話中的粗魯讓勇利瑟縮了一下，感激她為他說話，同時也很害怕，擔心有老師會聽到她說了這種話。 「你爸錯了，」優子大聲說，牽起勇利的手。「如果你要對勇利很壞的話，我們今天就不跟你說話了。」她轉過身，從豪跟前大步離開，讓勇利跌跌撞地跟上，不知道現在她要帶他去哪，因為快要開始上課了。 他覺得對豪有些抱歉，但他也不知道能說什麼。他知道豪大概不是故意要說那些傷人的話。 「優子，」他低聲說。「我覺得他不是故意要惹妳生氣的。我們回去位子上吧。」 「笨蛋！」優子忿忿地說，拍一下勇利的腦袋，放開他的手。洩氣地垮下肩膀。「我不在乎他是不是讓我生氣。我在意的是他讓你難過了！我知道他不是故意的，但他有些時候就是會說這麼糟糕的話。」 勇利聳聳肩，試著露出微笑。「我真的不介意的。」他說的是真的。他知道豪沒有惡意，而且他非常不願意成為優子跟豪絕交的理由。 「我們就去坐下吧，」他又建議一次。「快要開始上課了。」 優子點頭，她的怒火轉化為煩躁的咕噥，她瞪了豪一眼，邊在勇利旁邊的位子坐下。 「你等下最好跟勇利道歉，」她嘟起嘴，豪馬上就點頭了，看起來因為她肯回來而大大地鬆了口氣。 他們真的很可愛，勇利希望他們不要這麼常吵架，因為他們每次對彼此大吼大叫的時候都讓他的心臟受不了。即便是現在，優子瞪著豪，就讓勇利想要逃跑，躲開所有一切。 「我真的是認真的哦，」等優子瞪完豪之後，就告訴勇利。「你看起來真的很漂亮。你用的是哪款唇蜜？」 「噢，」勇利輕叫道，擺弄著手指，邊盯著桌面的裂紋。「我，呃，不是很清楚。這是真利的。她借我的。」 不在意他的結結巴巴，優子一下就笑了。「這顏色真的很漂亮呢。我以後可以去你家試試看嗎？」 勇利沒有馬上回答，因為開始上課了，但是他覺得一股暖意在胸中撲騰。稍後在優子敦促著豪，讓他用腳蹭著地板、紅著臉向勇利道歉時，變得更加溫暖。 不過當午餐時間開始，那溫度就迅速地消失了。在教室裡很安全，教室裡的同學們都習慣勇利的害羞性情，但外頭的孩子就沒這麼友善了。 「嘿，肥豬，你那是眼影嗎？」一個勇利根本不認識的傢伙正對他說話，勇利嚥下了發現對方是在叫自己時的訝異。這很奇怪，因為一開始他甚至不知道那個侮辱是衝著他來的。不過他左右看看，然後那個個子更高的男生就站在他面前，讓他感覺到逐漸萌生的驚惶。 「對、對，」他結結巴巴地說，即便他知道之後不會有什麼好事發生，因為向一個衝口就喊人「肥豬」的傢伙答話不會發生什麼好事。或許他根本不應該費事回應他。或許他就應該不管對方，去找優子和豪。 「你是什麼啊？女生嗎？」他推了勇利一把，力道不重，但也絕對不輕。勇利踉蹌了一下，大叫出聲，附近幾個學生停下腳步目睹了這整件事情。 怎麼又是那種侮辱？當然一個男生化了妝也不會自動改變他的性別啊！這一點道理也沒有！ 「我是男生，」勇利說，幾乎想揍自己，因為他又回話了。他揉揉對方剛推了一把的肩膀，想吞下慢慢淹沒他的害怕。離開這裡。走開就好。他不會再推你一次的。去找優子和豪。他想緩下心跳，而那一秒胸膛的緊繃就讓他知道這是徒勞無功。他甚至不知道現在發生了什麼事。如果他知道塗了唇蜜和眼影就會發生這種事，他絕對不會化妝的。 那個男生用力抓住他時讓他嚇了一大跳，用力到會痛。「放手，」勇利大叫，熱度蔓延到脖子上，因為這太可怕了。他感覺到眼淚在眼底打轉，他只想要爬到什麼東西底下，一直躲到放學為止。他一點都不明白，又好害怕，還有為什麼沒有人出來幫他？ 「你確定你是男生嗎？可能是騙我的。」他又推了勇利一次，這次更用力了，力道足夠讓勇利往後倒，屁股摔在地上。 「停下來，」勇利哭喊，討厭他破開的嗓音聽在耳裡的感覺。 高個子的男孩只是笑著，用腳把勇利踹倒在地。 「學校不應該讓像你這樣的屁精來上學。你的娘砲屁股會弄髒所有東西。」 這是勇利從沒遇過的狀況，他也永遠不想再面對一次。他討厭滾落臉頰的淚水，討厭自己沒辦法呼吸，每一次吸氣都像挨刀子捅。他的肩膀和手臂剛被抓住的地方很痛，踩住他的那隻腳也讓他的胸口很痛，他的掙扎一點用也沒有。 「停下來，」勇利又說了一次，呼吸成了吁喘，同時恐懼像浪潮一般沖蝕他。「拜託。」 「老天，」對方將雙手往上一拋。「我討厭你這樣的人！」他終於、終於從勇利胸前抬起腳，兩隻手塞進褲子口袋裡。 小心翼翼地、慢慢地，勇利開始爬起身，試著不要再哭了。他搖搖晃晃地站起，有幾個人跑向前幫他，不過勇利把他們推開，因為他們之前沒幫他，現在他也不想要他們的幫助了。 然後，在所有人來得及眨眼之前，那個高個子轉過身，直直揍了勇利的臉。這發生得太快，勇利甚至都沒時間尖叫。沒人來得及阻止他。痛苦很快地、猛烈地綻開，勇利的腦袋甩向一邊，嘴裡嘗到血液的金屬味。唇間裂開一聲哭喊，某種溫暖的液體從他唇角滴下。 噢天啊，噢天啊，噢天啊。 他用手碰碰嘴巴，看到手上沾著紅。驚恐的喊聲此起彼落。一個女生跑去找老師。有人喊著找校醫來，勇利的腦袋好暈，什麼也不能想。他也好痛。痛到他的呼吸開始急喘，讓他覺得他可能要吐了。那灘濺在地上的鮮紅突然更接近他的臉。他的視線正模糊晃動。 他意識到自己可能在哭。那喘氣的聲音一定也是他的。但是他的耳朵停不下嗡鳴，他的肺也不能順暢呼吸，如果在剛剛發生的一團混亂之後，他又馬上恐慌發作的話，就太糟糕了。 一隻手輕碰他的肩膀，但是勇利幾乎感覺不到。他太努力地撐住自己不要嚇壞。一個老師拖走那個揍他的男孩。勇利希望他要大禍臨頭了，然後又覺得想要別人遇到壞事很有罪惡感。不過接著更多的血從他嘴裡溢出，就讓他忘記了那股愧疚。 有人用毛巾按住他的嘴。可能是一個老師。但是勇利哭到沒注意是誰，現在才終於明白發生什麼事了。那股疼痛現在變得更清晰，他的胃一直翻攪，舌上嘗到的血味讓他很難忍下胃裡的早餐。 他也確定現在臉上的妝已經毀了，這想法只讓眼淚流得更急，因為他花了好久的時間才化好的。而那時他覺得自己多麼漂亮，但現在他只感覺得到痛苦、冰冷和孤獨。 他帶著一包冰塊、一大片瘀青，一封沒誠意的道歉信，以及沾著更多鮮血而非唇蜜的雙唇回家。 他再也沒帶妝去學校了。 勇利還是喜歡讓自己漂漂亮亮的。至少有些時候是這樣。長大的過程中，他用芭蕾作為出口，後來，就是滑冰。他學會怎麼透過肢體動作來表達情感，因為他從來不擅長透過文字來表達，他任憑感情順著音樂流動。勇利心情不好的一天，跳出的舞會讓美奈子老師淚眼汪汪。 他再也沒讓任何人看他化妝了。在那次有人推倒他、毆打他之後，就再也沒有了。不過當他一個人在家的時候，他會翻找真利寥寥幾件已經積灰的化妝品，然後給自己化點妝。到他十八歲的時候，他已經熟諳畫眼線的方法，還能在睡夢中給自己夾睫毛。他還會出門去買自己的化妝品，秘密地收藏起來。 一個人的時候，他會繼續練習和實驗，看一部又一部的Youtube教學影片，他的化妝品越變越多，對化妝的知識也越漸增長。粉底、遮瑕、粉餅、妝前乳。他二十歲的時候，已經可以快速地做好修容，而隨著他作為花滑選手的職業繼續發展，他也找到更多機會，能真正給自己上妝，而不用怕有人對他指指點點。 當他滑冰，或當他跳舞的時候，化妝可以視為一種對完美的強調，而不是某種禁忌。他可以打亮自己的顴骨，收到別人的讚美而非抨擊，這是一種勇利從來沒體驗過的自由。是在他第一次化妝，遇到那麼慘的下場之後，就不曾感受過的。 不過即便如此，勇利也很少在別人能看到他的時候化妝。這還是某種會讓他萌生怯意的事情，還是會讓他胸膛縮緊、掌心冒汗。某種他還是覺得需要躲躲藏藏，因為他知道別人看到之後會發生什麼的事情。他還是能感覺到臉頰上的疼痛。還記得那片瘀傷，顏色深而腫脹，還有他家人驚恐的表情。 他沒辦法再承受一次。不可能的。他的心太脆弱，他也沒有強壯到可以再挨一次毆打。 這也就是為什麼，當維克多盯著他看的時候，他可以感覺到自己的心碎了一次又一次。這也不是維克多第一次讓他心碎。畢竟他還記得以前維克多威脅他要辭去教練的事情。但是他也記得他溫暖的雙唇、在機場跑向他、抱住他，因為他從來沒有像愛著維克多那樣愛過別人而哭泣。 他與維克多一起度過的每一分秒，都是刺進他胸口的情感旋風。 但是沒有什麼，沒有任何比賽、沒有任何威脅，能像現在這樣嚇著勇利。因為維克多看到了帶著全妝，在家裡閒晃的勇利。他以為維克多出門了，但顯然他沒有。而他用那雙好藍、好藍的雙眼盯著勇利看，勇利嚇壞了。 「不要看我，」勇利大叫，已經拔足跑開，因為維克多不應該看到這個的。他腦袋裡面理智的部分知道維克多不會傷害他，但勇利還是可以感覺到那些言語的刺痛，那隻腳將他踩在地面的力道，還有接下來的拳頭。他依然能看到那明亮的血滴，從他嘴裡的裂口滲出，滴在地上。依然能感覺到他在事件發生好幾周後，想要微笑時那股劇烈的疼痛。 那是壓倒理智的古老恐懼，勇利的求生本能選擇了逃跑而非抵抗。 當雙手輕柔地攔下他時，他的心臟幾乎停了。維克多轉過勇利的身子，讓他們面對彼此，即便勇利盡力掙扎著擺脫維克多的掌握，依然徒勞無功。 「為什麼你這麼急著要跑走？」維克多問道，專注地端詳勇利的臉龐。 勇利手足無措。「別再那樣看我了。」 維克多沒有停下，雙眼直直看進勇利眼底。不過他反而鬆開勇利的手臂，碰觸他的臉頰。說真的，這給了勇利絕佳的逃跑機會，但面前的人是維克多，所以他留下了。 「你看起來很漂亮，」維克多用談論天氣的口吻說道。他們倆都坐下來，勇利認輸，讓維克多偎在他身旁，因為他就是個抱抱怪獸。「你是自己化的嗎？」勇利嚥了口口水，又嚥了一次，因為這感覺像一整碗豬排飯卡在喉嚨裡。 「對，」他終於能夠開口說話，壓下恐慌，因為這是維克多啊。這是維克多。是永遠不會故意真的傷害勇利的維克多。是會為小事道歉，有些時候很遲鈍，但也思慮周到又聰明的維克多。是支持著勇利進步，自己也一直成長的維克多。 當身處這樣的情境時，他沒有理由害怕。 「我一直都很喜歡化妝。」勇利開口，即便他不知道為什麼他要告訴維克多這些，因為他甚至都沒問，不過不管了。他現在開始說了，所以他最好能夠說完。維克多應了一聲，點點頭表示他正在聽。 「就算是我還小的時候，我覺得這樣看起來很漂亮。所以有一天，上學之前我化了一點妝。然後，說得婉轉一點的話，就是我沒有得到……很好的回應。」 維克多皺起眉，用他長長的手指轉著勇利的頭髮。這感覺很好，有種熟悉的舒服感。他們面對著彼此坐著，鼻尖幾乎相碰著，而他知道維克多可以看到他的睫毛膏、眼線、眼影、口紅。那是正紅色的口紅，大膽又明亮——是無關勇利的一切。至少，他在遇到維克多以前是那麼想的。而這是一種他過去從來沒有試過的顏色，一種他現在覺得很適合自己的顏色。 「是你的爸媽生氣了嗎？」維克多輕柔地問。 「不是、不是！」勇利向他保證道，很高興地看到維克多眉間的皺紋暫時消失了。「他們非常支持我。問題出在學校的學生身上。他們……」勇利噘起嘴，「很壞。」 維克多又皺起眉頭，他將頭歪向一邊。「怎麼回事？」 他一定有所猜測，因為那並不是多複雜的事情，不過勇利知道維克多在等著自己告訴他。 做了個鬼臉，勇利並不真的很想告訴維克多那件事。不過維克多露出了那種好奇又關切的小狗狗般的表情，而勇利對此沒有多少抵抗力。再說，他也討厭自己不把事情告訴維克多。 「就是罵我啊，有些人瞪著我看啊，沒什麼特別的。還有一個傢伙揍了我的臉。」他試著讓這些事情聽起來無所謂，但看維克多的表情，可能沒什麼效果。他的雙眼可想見地睜大了，接著目光發冷。勇利顫了下，儘管他知道這不是針對他的，想著不知道該不該覺得受到奉承。 「混帳東西，」維克多直接說道，勇利同意地點點頭。 「不過那是很久以前的事情了，」他安撫地說。 「還是個混帳，」維克多忿忿地說道，勇利很高興他沒有表現得太誇張。勇利不像維克多，他並不浮誇，而且雖然有人袒護他感覺很好，也不可能讓這麼久以前發生的事情重頭來過了。 勇利又點點頭。「對。他真的很混帳。我之後就沒再化妝去學校了。因為我討厭輸掉的感覺，而我感覺我已經輸了，我後來還是繼續練習化得更好。我之前想要跑走是因為我很害怕，」勇利承認。「現在沒有那麼可怕了。」 他朝著維克多咧嘴笑，撲扇著眼睫，根據過去的經驗，清楚知道如果維克多發出那樣的抽氣聲，代表自己的動作對他有什麼樣的影響。 「我覺得我的努力有收穫了，對吧？我好看嗎。」 維克多過了好幾秒才回覆正常的心律。不過當勇利將側臉靠向對方結實的胸膛時，他敢說他的心跳還是飆快了。 「非常好看，」維克多毫不猶豫地說道，勇利知道他自己的臉頰一定紅得比腮紅更深。「真是太可惜了，」維克多不知怎地靠得更近，他薄荷味的呼息，吹在勇利臉上，「其他的小孩，」一個落在唇上的吻，而後又是一個，更深的吻，他緩緩地伸手撫上勇利的衣服，伸舌舔去他紅色的唇膏，「沒看見這點。」 之後勇利的唇上沒了口紅，但也沒有鮮血，倒是臉上浮著一團淺淺的紅暈，一抹暈開的眼線，跟一個非常快活的維克多，要勇利在他們下回接吻的時候，留個唇印在他臉上。
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10569558
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Morskaia dieva
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{
"Archive Warning": "No Archive Warnings Apply",
"Category": "M/M",
"Characters": "male mermaid, Male Human",
"Fandom": "Original Work",
"Language": "Русский",
"Rating": "Mature",
"author": "by yisandra",
"chapters": "1/1",
"completed": "",
"published": "2017-04-08T00:00:00",
"words": "1,587",
"Additional Tags": "Humor, Xenophilia",
"Relationship": "male mermaid/male human",
"Character": null,
"Relationships": null,
"Series": "Ганс Миллер в поисках мечты",
"Collections": null,
"Fandoms": null,
"Archive Warnings": null,
"Categories": null,
"Bookmarks": null,
"Chapters": null,
"Comments": null,
"Completed": null,
"Hits": null,
"Kudos": null,
"Published": null,
"Words": null,
"Updated": null
}
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***– Тут уж как повезёт, – наставлял Ганса пожилой просоленный моряк, словно сошедший с иллюстрации из детской книжки (у него даже седые бакенбарды имелись, не говоря о курительной трубке из натурального вереска). – Они твари привередливые, их одной рыбой не купишь, рыбы тут у нас и так вон – полное море, успевай только сети ставить.– И они, что же… ставят сети? – благоговейно вопросил Ганс.Моряк посмотрел на него, как на тупого малька, и пыхнул трубкой.– А как же. Чай, не дурнее нас как-то.– Ну ладно, допустим, рыбу не брать…– Как же не брать? Непременно брать! Подплываешь к ихней территории, вешаешь за борт «кричалку» и ждёшь. Ежели которой захочется пообщаться, тут уж ты держи рыбу наготове. Глядишь, она пожрёт, да и подобреет, тут уж не теряйся. Обещать ничего не стану, только бывало уже, что им занятно бывает «полюбопытствовать» с человеком, ежели ты меня понимаешь. Только вот чего, – старик пристально вгляделся в глаза внимательно слушающего туриста. – Не вздумай глупость какую отколоть, парень. У русалки не только зубы острее, чем у барракуды, они ещё и косяком всегда ходят. Вздумаешь одну обижать или там силком в лодку тянуть, вмиг на дно утащат, только пузыри всплывут. – А правда, – Ганс боязливо понизил голос, – что они иногда… ну, едят людей?– Я о таком не слыхал. Раньше, когда хватало умников, что на них охоту затевали, русалки, бывало, корабли топили, и уж что с теми утопленниками делали – я без понятия. Может, и обгладывали. А так – ты их не тронешь, и они тебя, значит, тоже не тронут. Ну что, передумал, небось?– Нет, – храбро сглотнул Ганс. – У меня мечта, понимаете ли. С детства мечтаю о прекрасной русалке. Я ведь, – в приступе внезапной откровенности добавил он, – один раз уже обжёгся… На Северном полюсе русалки больше похожи на тюленей – никому не в обиду будет сказано.Он печально вздохнул.Старик усмехнулся и покровительственно похлопал его по плечу:– Выше нос, парень! Наши русалки похожи на все твои мокрые мечты одновременно!***Ласковое море в солнечных лучах казалось изумрудным. Ганс, обмазавшись с ног до головы солнцезащитным кремом, созерцал тропическую даль в бинокль. Катер качался у кораллового островка, в большом ведре тяжко всплескивала рыба.Русалки появились после полудня, в количестве, намного превышавшем скромные гансовы запросы. Правда, интереса к его катеру они не проявляли и не приближались. Ганс вообще затруднился бы сказать, чем они заняты. Кажется, они просто… резвились, играя друг с другом, как дельфины. В отличие от полярных сородичей, обитатели тропических вод были созданиями яркими и изящными, как тропические рыбки, так что от такого зрелища даже на расстоянии начинало рябить в глазах.Ганс отёр лоб над биноклем и чуть не свалился за борт, когда сзади его вдруг окликнули певучим голосом:– Эй, человек!Поспешно развернувшись, он обнаружил, что, будучи слишком увлечён плясками пребывающих в отдалении русалок, невольно позволил одной из них подобраться совсем близко. Дева не просто подплыла к нему, она умудрилась незамеченной выбраться на коралловый островок и расположиться там в весьма изящной позе, как бы призывая собой полюбоваться.А полюбоваться там было на что. Старый моряк не соврал, местные морские девы вполне отвечали гансовым представлениям о том, как должны выглядеть настоящие русалки.Прелестное создание было весьма миниатюрным, милого, тропически-яркого жёлто-красного колёра с черепаховыми чёрными пятнами. Сердцевидной формы лицо обрамляли нежные кружевные плавники ярко-алого цвета, переход туловища в хвост знаменовался тонкой талией, и – о чудо! – сосков у русалки было не шесть, не восемь и даже не четыре, а именно два, причём они располагались на маленьких, но вполне привычных людскому глазу бугорках.– Ты прекрасна! – выпалил Ганс.Русалка мелодично рассмеялась, запрокинув голову. Зубы у неё и впрямь были преострые, похожие на иголочки, но отважного туриста это уже не могло смутить.– Прости, я хотел сказать, что необыкновенно счастлив знакомству, – опомнившись, сообщил он.– Вижу, – лукаво отозвалась русалочка и шевельнула хвостом. – Ты тоже довольно симпатичный и забавный, особенно для человека. В последнее время здесь все туристы ужасно скучные, щёлкают своими камерами и лопочут что-то друг с другом. Один даже пытался покормить меня с рук! – она возмущённо хлопнула по скале хвостовым плавником и наморщила носовые щели. – Надеюсь, ты ничего такого делать не собираешься?– Нет, что ты! Я преодолел весь мир в поисках такой, как ты! – пылко заверил Ганс и неловко добавил. – И я привёз тебе рыбы.Русалка вновь засмеялась, потом провела по мокрому камню рядом с собой.– Рыба никуда не убежит, ног-то у неё нет. Перелезай ко мне и пообщаемся с глазу на глаз.Тон был более чем многообещающим. Ошалев от радости, Ганс полез из катера. Да что уж там – за такой девой с таким голоском он полез бы хоть к киту в пасть!Русалка благосклонно наблюдала за его акробатическим этюдом «переберись из катера на остров, не свалившись в воду», поощрительно похлопывая плавником, и только изредка подхихикивала. В финале она даже подала кавалеру руку, помогая устроиться рядом. Рука была гладкая, гидрофобная и очень приятная на ощупь. Ганс с облегчением уселся, и русалка тут же чуточку подвинулась, прижавшись к его бедру и ноге приятно-прохладным хвостом. Возможно, не только среди людей существовали особи, стремящиеся заключать в объятья представителей другого вида. По крайней мере, именно так подумал Ганс, завороженно глядя в большие круглые глаза русалки. Глаза были чудесного жёлто-серого цвета и, насколько можно было судить, слегка насмешливы.– Меня зовут Ганс! Ганс Миллер, – спохватившись, представился Ганс.– Ганс Миллер, – прожурчала русалка. – Можешь звать меня Сия. Ты приплыл, надеясь, что я тебе спою? Или, – тут она совершенно недвусмысленно улыбнулась, – ради разнузданной страсти на мокрых солёных камнях?Ганс покраснел. Его смущение ничуть не облегчал тот факт, что единственная оставшаяся на нём (проклятая жара!) деталь одежды – красные купальные трусы – были бессильны скрыть его восхищение обществом Сии.– Увы, последнее едва ли достижимо, – безжалостно разбила его надежды дева, одновременно с какой-то дельфиньей наглостью заваливаясь ему поперёк колен.– П-п-почему?.. – пробормотал Ганс, невольно опуская ладонь на её маленькую грудь.– Потому что в воде это делать намного удобнее! – засмеялась русалка.– Я так рад, что у тебя есть грудь… – выдал растерявшийся Ганс.– Конечно, есть, а то как я буду кого-нибудь выкармливать, сам подумай, – Сия глядела на него, смешливо щурясь. – Ну, какого сигнала ты ещё ждёшь? Погладь меня!Он с радостью воспользовался этим разрешением (больше смахивавшим на приказ) и принялся оглаживать её сильное изящное тело, покрытое влажной, упругой кожей морского животного. Сия вертелась, то и дело норовя повалить человека случайным движением, и издавала сладкие низкие звуки, всё более протяжные по мере того, как руки человека постепенно спускались к щели мышечного кармана на нижней стороне хвоста.Увы, дойти до цели Ганс не успел – внезапно щель чуть разошлась, и наружу показалось нечто острое и нежно-розовое. Прежде, чем Ганс успел осознать, что перед ним не что иное, как головка члена, рекомый орган оказался снаружи настолько, насколько это физически допускала характерная для дельфинов складка препуции.– Что это?! – заорал Ганс, отдёргивая руки.От его резкого движения Сия соскользнул(а) с его колен и, издав недовольную трель, сел(а), вызывающе топорщась столь ужаснувшей Ганса деталью на фоне обтекаемой формы тела.– А на что это похоже? Член, разумеется!– Ты… ты мужчина?! – Ганс потрясённо уставился на пресловутый член. Лиловато-розовый, он был довольно длинным и имел причудливую, на человеческий взгляд, форму: очень толстый (Ганс прикинул, что мог бы обхватить его только двумя руками) у основания, он сильно и быстро сужался, а благодаря лёгкому, но явному S-образному изгибу, имел какой-то совершенно инопланетный вид.Под его взглядом член, кажется, ещё чуточку выдвинулся наружу.– А это не очевидно? – Сия взял его за руку и потянул ближе к органу преткновения. – Я мужчина, остро нуждающийся в твоей любви прямо сейчас, Ганс Миллер!– Но у тебя же есть грудь! – из последних сил возразил Ганс, осторожно обхватив чужой во всех смыслах член ближе к срединной части и охнув от непривычного ощущения плотной скользкой кожи, ничуть не похожей на человеческую. – Я… я думал, ты девушка!– Популярная ошибка, – Сия издал мягкую поощрительную трель, когда Ганс начал на пробу двигать рукой. – У моего вида мужчины кормят малышей… это логично… женщинам и так много чего приходится… ты можешь двигаться немного быстрее?– Да, конечно, прости, – смутился Ганс. Первоначальный шок уже прошёл, и он понял, что сам факт близости с настоящей сказочной русалкой перевешивает неожиданную новость о поле этой самой русалки. Тем более, он хотел экзотической близости? Он получил такую.Неожиданно Ганс почувствовал, что скрученный кончик русалочьего члена двигается вне всякой связи со скольжением его руки.– Постой, – сказал Сия, и его член обвил запястье ошарашенного и очарованного Ганса. – Я не хочу быть неблагодарным…– Не бери в голову, – щедро отозвался Ганс. Помня об остроте зубов Сии, он меньше всего хотел помещать в этот шредер чувствительные части собственного организма; в то же, что самец русалки, коварно скрывший свою половую принадлежность, допустит человека до собственных сокровенных отверстий, Ганс не верил.– Ты не поверишь, что я умею делать одним только членом, – искушающе проинформировал коварный русал. – Ни один человек со мной не сравнится.– М-м-м, – заколебался Ганс. – В другой раз, ладно?– Ла-а-а-адно, – протянул Сия и вдруг обнял человека обеими руками.В следующий момент Ганс понял, что оказался в воде, к счастью, его продолжали удерживать так, что голова была на поверхности.Он издал немужественный визг и почувствовал, что его плавки неумолимо стягивают вниз.– Не брыкайся, захлебнёшься, – ласково прожурчал Сия. – И не бойся, я не обижу.Ганс прикинул перспективы и зажмурился, покорно повиснув на русале.Его собственный начавший опадать от шока член обхватило что-то гибкое и ловкое, заскользило плотным кольцом, защекотало головку. Учитывая, что руки Сии обвивали его плечи и талию, долго гадать, что же это «что-то», не приходилось.– Знаешь, – выдохнул Ганс, – даже если вы едите людей, это… это того стоит.***Целоваться с русалкой было занятием рискованным – благодаря зубам – но риск вознаграждался. Языком Сия тоже умел творить самые удивительные вещи.– Я приплыву ещё раз, если можно, – сказал Ганс с надеждой. Его плавки утонули, и он сидел на коралловом острове голой задницей, но его это сейчас совсем не смущало.– Конечно, приплывёшь, – самодовольно зевнул Сия. – Но я устал! Самое время съесть твою рыбу.
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10514745
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Return to Lahmu
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{
"Archive Warning": "No Archive Warnings Apply",
"Category": "F/M",
"Characters": "Cassian Andor, Jyn Erso, K-2SO (Star Wars), Bodhi Rook, Baze Malbus, Chirrut Îmwe",
"Fandom": null,
"Language": "English",
"Rating": "General Audiences",
"author": "by rebelrey",
"chapters": "2/?",
"completed": "",
"published": "2017-04-01T00:00:00",
"words": "5,192",
"Additional Tags": "holy crap this is my first fic i'm publishing, took me long enough haha, anyways guess i should slap some real tags on this, Fluff, Cuddling, Angst, Sass, let's be honest rogue one is nothing without their sass, Rebelcaptain - Freeform, Sharing a Bed, Childhood Trauma, Post-Rogue One, Alternate Universe - Everyone Lives/Nobody Dies, almost a one-shot, Rebelcaptainprompts",
"Relationship": null,
"Character": null,
"Relationships": "Cassian Andor/Jyn Erso, Cassian Andor & Jyn Erso",
"Series": null,
"Collections": null,
"Fandoms": "Rogue One: A Star Wars Story (2016), Star Wars - All Media Types",
"Archive Warnings": null,
"Categories": null,
"Bookmarks": null,
"Chapters": null,
"Comments": null,
"Completed": null,
"Hits": null,
"Kudos": null,
"Published": null,
"Words": null,
"Updated": null
}
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“Lah’mu? Why do you want to go there ? There’s nothing.” Bodhi’s words were not meant to wound Jyn, but they still sliced into her like he had been wielding a saber, rather than innocent ignorance and a habit of letting all his thoughts tumble out of his mouth. Jyn did her best to maintain a neutral face though, keeping her arms crossed and shrugging one shoulder. “I have a hunch, we could find something useful there.”Cassian looked at her from across the hold of the U-wing, but said nothing. He knew why she wanted to go to Lah’mu. Or at least why she had a hunch about it. Cassian had read the file Draven provided on Jyn Erso for Extraction Team Bravo. Lah’mu was where she hid with her parents for four years, hid from Krennic and a galaxy torn apart by terror and bloodshed. It was the last place she saw her mother or father. It was the last time she had been a child, before Saw brought her to the Partisans, to the fight. Cassian knew all of this, but he didn’t say anything. What right did he have to say something? What reason?Through all the confusion of Scarif and the destruction of Alderaan, and the Battle of Yavin and the current scramble to relocate the bulk of the fleet from Yavin to force knows where, they had all forgotten, seemingly, what Jyn was going through. They had all lost people yes, but how many of them had regained them, the hope of them anyways, only to lose them again in less than a week, and before their very eyes.Cassian tried to imagine, what it might have been like, to know his father was still alive, albeit thinking he was an instrument of the Empire. Then to find out that, the whole time, he was a rebel deep down, trying to fight the Empire from the inside. To find out his location, and truly believe the Alliance was sending an extraction for him. To get there, only to realize, too late, that the extraction was an assassination (by someone who was one of the first people you’d allowed yourself to trust in years). And despite all that, to still fight fate, to run , climb , claw tooth and nail to see him , the last person who you know really loved you, to try and save him. And then steps away, to lose him again, this time forever. The agony of holding him in your arms and realizing you have to tell him, “it’s me, it’s me,” because how could he know it was you? You were eight years old the last time he saw you, he won’t recognize you. And in that moment, just like fifteen years ago, you’re ripped away from him, again . “Alright,” Bodhi said, not wanting to start an argument. He definitely sensed, on some level, Jyn’s tension; probably saw it in the set of her shoulders and the clench of her jaw. “Captain?” he asked. Cassian nodded without hesitation. They would go. And they didn’t need to worry about approval, not really. They were heroes of the Rebellion and Leia had made it clear, whatever they wanted to do or wherever they wanted to go, as long as it was a part of the fight for the Rebellion they would have the support and the resources they needed. No one was questioning Rogue One’s tactics again, not after Scarif. Bodhi rattled off some numbers, trying to approximate how long it would be until they could depart. He would get the official stats from Kay (for fuel and supplies), but he guessed they would be ready to go in about twelve hours, a day at the most. Jyn gave a curt nod, unfolded her arms and strode away stiffly, hands clenched at her sides. Cassian mumbled a thank you to a confused Bodhi and quickly strode after her. “Jyn...Jyn!” Cassian called after her receding figure. Kriff , had she always been so fast? He went after her, alternating between a quick walk and running, trying to keep up as she strode deeper into the ziggurat. They had reached the living quarters by the time he caught up to her.She continued to ignore him, despite the fact that she must feel his presence behind her, so he reached out and gently wrapped his fingers around her wrist, stopping her. She whirled around to face him and Cassian saw her stony mask was slipping. “Jyn…” he murmured, “I…” he hadn’t thought this far ahead. “Cassian, please let go of me,” Jyn said quietly. The words sounded like a request, but Cassian knew Jyn well enough to realize they were a threat. Let me go or you’ll regret it . Usually Cassian obeyed. He didn’t like to force anyone, much less Jyn, into an situation they didn’t want to be in. But it had been weeks since Scarif and this wasn’t the first time Cassian had tried to convince Jyn to let him in. She hadn’t allowed it. Not after their narrow survival of Scarif, or after the subsequent loss and reacquisition of the plans they had been ready to die for. Nor after the destruction of the Death Star, the planet killer that had been the final work of her father, the reason he had been absent for most of her life. And Cassian had been resigned to letting it go, to let Jyn heal in her own time, on her own terms, but Cassian was beginning to question whether Jyn really needed to be on her own right now. She had shut almost the whole team out, and anyone could see the isolation was beginning to eat away at her. Cassian began to loosen his grip but didn’t let go. “Jyn…” he waited for her to look at him. When she finally did, her eyes were tight and her lips were pressed into a firm line. Even though the corridor was empty save for them, Cassian still whispered as he said, “please, I just want to help.” After he said this he released her wrist, letting his hand slide down over her hand, but before letting go altogether Jyn’s own fingers curled, catching his hand for a moment. Jyn gave the slightest nod. “Come on,” he said, leading her further down the corridor to his own quarters. His living space was just barely bigger than her’s, since he did still technically outrank her, and he had some Corellian whiskey stashed away that needed drinking anyways. Jyn dropped onto the side of the bed, one of the only pieces of furniture in the room, and Cassian found the hidden bottle of whiskey and poured two generous mugs. He considered leaving the bottle in its hiding spot, but decided against it and brought it over, handing a mug to Jyn before sitting down beside her. Not wanting to press anymore than he already had, he simply sat there, nursing the whiskey (Jyn had already downed hers in one go). Cassian suddenly felt extremely tired, after the long day of helping to sort through intercepted transmissions, search for a viable location to establish the new Base One, answer question after question sent from various members of the Senate, it all suddenly came crashing down on him. He let himself fall backwards onto the bed, legs hanging over the edge. He could see Jyn out of the side of his periphery, and his eyes followed her as she leaned down, refilled her mug, and quickly drained it again. Then she leaned back, propped up on her elbows, and let her head loll with her eyes towards the low, dark ceiling. She sighed. “So, how much do you know about Lah’mu?” she asked. Cassian was quiet for a moment before responding. “I know you lived there for a few years, from the ages of four to eight. That your father and mother were trying to hide from the wars. That the Empire eventually found where you were and came to get you all. I know your father was taken and your mother…” he hesitated, but went on. “Your mother was killed the extraction team, but they brought her body back to Coruscant for burial.” Cassian glanced at Jyn, to see if she was reacting to any of the information. He had no way of knowing what she knew, what Saw had told her, what she had found out over the years. She didn’t move. “I know the Empire never found you there, but that wasn’t for a lack of trying. That presumably Saw Gerrera came and got you.”Jyn sighed again, and let her arms buckle, so that she fell back onto the bed alongside Cassian. She crossed her arms over her torso and kept her eyes trained on the ceiling. From the side Cassian could see her eyes shining, glassy from unshed tears. “So not much?” she asked.“Enough to know it was your home, for a little while.” Cassian said. He fell silent again. Jyn was quiet long enough that Cassian thought she might have fallen asleep, but she spoke again. “I saw it,” she said. Cassian turned his head, gave her a questioning look, but said nothing, waiting.“I saw them shoot her...my mother. She was trying to stop them, stop them from taking my father. From taking me. I wasn’t supposed to be there, I was supposed to be running and hiding, but…” She quickly wiped at her eyes, angry at the tears betraying her. She could feel the whiskey finally seeping into her consciousness. “And he was there. Krennic. He led the...what did you call it? Extraction . Was that in the file?” Cassian’s memory flashed back to the citadel, Krennic, the man responsible for her whole family’s ruin, pointing a blaster at Jyn, ready to kill her. He remembered seeing Jyn flinch out of the corner of his eye as his own blaster bolt took Krennic down. He suppressed a shiver, despite the humid air.“No,” he said. “I had no idea...Jyn, I’m…” Words failed Cassian. That didn’t matter though, he’d never liked words much anyways. Words were twisted easily into lies. Instead he reached out a hand and squeezed Jyn’s elbow. She uncrossed her arms, found his hand with her own and held it.“That’s not the only reason I want to go there,” Jyn added, meeting Cassian’s eyes with her own. “I remember...well I think I remember, data files. My father, he was wiping all the data as the troopers came. That’s why he had us go on ahead of him. I’m sure he got all of it, and anything he didn’t Krennic either found or burned, but…he had a lot of hiding spots. And if anything at all was left behind…”Cassian understood. If anything was left behind, they couldn’t risk it being found by the Empire. Even the smallest shred of data could make a huge difference if, Force forbid, they tried to revive the planet killer. He gave her hand a small squeeze. “If anything is there, we’ll find it, we’ll keep it out of their hands,” Cassian said. They were both silent after that. They lay there in heavy, sleepy stillness (made all the heavier by the whiskey and the tropical heat) until they both fell asleep, both positioned half on and half off the bed, not caring how uncomfortable it felt. At least, not until Cassian woke up in the middle of the night, a terrible ache in the middle of his back. He leaned up painfully, gently releasing Jyn’s hand, which was still clasped to his own. He looked down at her for a moment, watching the gentle rise and fall of her frame as she breathed deeply. Finally, he slid off the bed. Gathering her up in his arms as best as he could, he shifted Jyn so she was lying on the bed more comfortably. He knelt down, searching for the spare bedding beneath his bunk so he get a few more hours sleep in the U-wing, when he heard shifting and a voice heavy with sleep ask, “Cassian?” His heart skipped at the sound, although he couldn’t admit to himself why.“Yeah?” he asked, his own voice gruff. He didn’t trust himself to get past one syllable. Jyn squinted at him blearily. Even through the haze of sleep she was able to put the pieces together. “Don’t be stupid. We can share a bed,” she said, shifting over so she was on one half of the mattress. Cassian remained mute but nodded. Gingerly, he lied down on the other half behind her, careful to give her more than enough personal space.In the end it didn’t matter all that much, as by morning she was tucked into his chest, his arms wrapped around her, like it was the most natural thing in the world. They both woke to the noisy clanking sound of K-2 outside the door. Since when was Kay noisy? Cassian thought, annoyed at the abrupt return to consciousness that required him to separate himself from Jyn; a thought which he immediately brushed off as a ridiculous barely-conscious thought that definitely didn’t make any sense and couldn’t possibly be his own. Meanwhile, Jyn groaned and tucked her face into the pillow, mumbling unintelligibly into it. Cassian thought he made out the words “shoot” and “droid,” and decided he better intervene before Kay ended up in pieces. Cassian disentangled himself from the bed and moved to his door, opening it to find the gangly black droid waiting.“Kay, what is it?” Cassian asked, sounding more impatient than he meant to. Kay’s gears gave a short whir ( was that a huff? ) and he stated, “Cassian. Bodhi told me to find you. He says we will be ready to leave for Lah’mu late this afternoon. He wanted to know whether we will leave immediately or wait until tomorrow morning? We need to get the flight plans submitted so we can leave without any trouble, like last time. He also wanted me to ask Jyn if she can provide specific coordinates for our arrival on Lah’mu, but I could not find her as she was not in her room. Do you know where she is?” Cassian hesitated briefly, which was a mistake. It didn’t take long for Kay’s visual receivers to rove the room and spot the form still lying on Cassian’s bed. “Oh, is that Jyn?” He raised his volume. “JYN, BODHI WOULD LIKE TO KNOW…” Cassian shushed the droid and pulled him quickly into the room, closing the door behind him. “Kay! You’re going to wake up the whole hall,” Cassian hissed. With her face still buried in the pillow, Jyn made a gesture towards Kay that would be considered rude on most planets within the Inner Rim. Kay looked unperturbed, even for a droid.“I’m just doing as Bodhi asked,” Kay replied. There was no use arguing with him. “We’ll leave this afternoon, the trip takes long enough that the time we leave at won’t really matter. And as for specific coordinates, we can worry about that once we’re closer.”“Was that so difficult to answer?” Kay inquired dryly. The silence that met his question was overwhelmingly hostile. Kay didn’t notice. “I will go tell Bodhi, then.”As the droid was about to leave the room, a thought suddenly occurred to Cassian, and he stopped Kay just outside the doorway.“Kay, can you do me a favor and please don’t mention to anyone that you found Jyn inside my room this morning?” Cassian tried to keep his tone aloof, but the more words tumbled out of his mouth, the more it sounded like he was pleading.Kay's eye bulbs dimmed ever so slightly, like he was narrowing them in suspicion. “Why?” he asked, uncharacteristically succinct of him. “It’s just that, they might misunderstand, or they’ll assume it means...something that it doesn’t. Just… please, Kay?” Asking K2 to keep a secret was like asking a stormtrooper to shoot straight, but the droid still gave a nod before he trudged back down the corridor towards the main hangar. Cassian watched him go, muttered something like a prayer to himself, and retreated to his room, hoping that for once one of his missions could go smoothly.
Of course, it didn’t...
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
- THEN - Cassian couldn’t remember when he fell for her. He was in the middle before he knew he had even begun. He thinks it might have started when she stole his blaster, way back at the beginning, before they’d even gone to Jedha. They were about to depart when he’d received his orders from Draven, the orders that Galen Erso was to be killed on sight if found. Returning to the U-wing, he had been so wrapped up in thought that he hadn’t even noticed Jyn kneeling over his bag by the door. Not until Kay in the cockpit had mentioned something about a blaster and demanding why he didn’t get one had Cassian realized. Of course, he had demanded it back. He’d read her file, he had faced the ire of Extraction Team Bravo whom were sent to retrieve her from Wobani - Melshi had been rather perturbed over one of his soldiers taking a shovel to the face from someone who was meant to be an asset to the Alliance. The facts told him she could not be permitted a blaster, especially when he only had Kay to watch his back.But when he looked into her eyes, heard her say, “trust goes both ways,” he had relented against his better judgement, against all reason and strategy (as Kay had been quick to point out). He hadn’t needed her trust for the mission’s sake, he had Draven’s threats of a speedy return to Wobani he could hold over her head. But he had ignored logic and put her need, the need that burned so clearly behind her eyes, before the mission.It had only grown from there. He had held down a smile when she called Kay “ target practice” - secretly, it was his new favorite name for the droid - and he had completely failed to hide his awe when he saw her skills in combat on Jedha, especially with the truncheons. When they had been captured by Saw’s soldiers, he had been unable to keep his mind from wandering to her, throughout the long journey to the partisans’ hideout, the whole time they were imprisoned there, when they were trying to escape the devastation of the planet killer’s first test, it had been a constant echo in the back of his mind: Where is Jyn? Where is Jyn? After he had found Bodhi, the whole reason they were there to see Saw, she had lost all her usefulness to the mission, to the Alliance, and she was a liability from that point forward, but he couldn’t leave her behind, he couldn’t . He might not have been able to admit it at that point, he couldn’t have admitted it before Scarif, but from then on he had been bound to her, and her fate had become tied to his own.
* * *
Jyn hated to admit she loved someone, much less that she trusted them. Loving people had never gone well for her. It was usually a sure sign that they were going to be ripped away from her long before she was ready to let go. It had happened with her mother, her father, Saw, every person she’d thought to be a friend. Loving or trusting people inevitably led to absence or betrayal. So when she began to trust Cassian, she had fought it. She didn’t want to trust anyone, not again. She could only take so much heartbreak, and the easy solution to avoiding it was to not allow anyone close enough to be capable of it. She had tried hard to keep him at arm’s length, to not let him too close, but it had failed. Because every time she found herself vulnerable and exposed, every moment where everyone else she’d known would have walked away, would have left her to fend for herself, Cassian had been there. He had saved her from the partisan in Jedha City, who’d almost thrown the thermal grenade toward her, despite the fact that it put his mission in jeopardy. He had dragged her from Saw’s chambers when the world was crumbling around her, and everyone else had already fled. He had done the same on Eadu, when she held her papa in her arms for the last time, and the world was crumbling within herself. He had been there for her again and again and again, without hesitation, without fail. Try as she might, Cassian found a way to penetrate her armor and attach himself to her, until despite her best efforts she couldn’t help but trust him. She couldn’t help but love him. - NOW -As their ship approached, Baze and Bodhi looked out the side port to get a first look at the small planet. Jyn sat next to Chirrut, trying to maintain a stony exterior, but she was betrayed by fingers which tapped a nervous rhythm against her knee. Mercifully, Chirrut pretended to not notice.“What do you see, my friends?” Chirrut called to his Jedhan comrades. “Lots of green,” Bodhi replied quickly, looking at the lush plains covering the majority of the planet.Baze nodded and grunted, “rings,” referring to the halo-like belt that orbited around the middle of Lah’mu. Chirrut nodded, satisfied with the simple descriptions. He leaned towards Jyn and said, quiet enough so that no one else heard, “Is it as you remember?” Jyn was startled. She had chosen not to tell the rest of the crew why this specific planet had been selected. There had been a few curious questions from the team, but they had all been brushed off by Jyn, and Cassian had kept silent on the matter. As far as any of them knew, the Alliance had determined there was possibly some sort of intelligence there that Rogue One had been tasked with recovering if it was present. Of course, Chirrut had still figured out the truth.Jyn almost asked how he knew, but instead just shook her head - this was Chirrut after all. “I don’t remember all that much about it. It was a long time ago.”He gave another silent nod and let the rest of their journey to the surface pass in peace.Arriving, they landed near a cluster of farms and settlements, the closest thing to a spaceport the planet had. Jyn had told Cassian she couldn’t remember the exact coordinates of the homestead and that they would need to figure it out once they were on-planet. While this was mostly true, she was also grateful to avoid their immediate arrival because, deep down, she knew that she wasn’t ready yet. Jyn wasn’t ready to see the burnt and abandoned skeleton of her childhood home and to remember memories and feelings long forgotten or shuttered away in her mind, hidden where they couldn’t hurt her. After leaving the ship to take a quick survey of the homesteads and fields that surrounded them, Cassian returned to the freighter. Everyone loosely clustered around him in the ship’s main hold and he laid out their plan for the rest of the mission.“Jyn, Kay, and I are going to take the landspeeder and find our mark. Based off the data we have, it shouldn’t take us more than a few days to locate it and determine whether there is any data to be retrieved.Baze, Chirrut, Bodhi, I want you three to stay here with the freighter to watch our backs. Bodhi, listen in to all nearby comm channels and keep us apprised of anything unusual you might hear, and try to keep a line of communication open with Rebel Base. Let us know about any pertinent information, but try to keep our channel as quiet as you can; if someone else does show up, we don’t want to give them any sort of edge.“Baze and Chirrut, you two, do... your thing. Keep an eye on the settlements, the skies, the people, the Force. If anything is off, you know what to do.”Cassian looked around, letting his eyes pause on each face in turn, coming to Jyn last. He kept his eyes locked with hers for a long moment before he continued. “This is a simple reconnaissance mission. We don’t anticipate any issues or unwelcome company. However, as we all know well by now, things rarely go as we plan,” (Baze gave a dry “ ha! ”), “and we’re going to be as ready as we can for every possibility.” Cassian paused, giving the team a chance to voice questions or concerns, but they remained silent. He nodded. “May the force be with us.”As she, Kay, and Cassian began to head out, Jyn noticed Bodhi’s face looked slightly crestfallen. For all the places he’d been as a cargo pilot, he rarely got to see any of them and Jyn knew he wanted to explore more, to bury his memories of destruction and horror with new ones, hopefully of beauty and wonder. She paused by Bodhi as Cassian and Kay continued out of the hold, resting a hand on his shoulder.“Next time,” she said gently with a smile, “we’ll definitely need you out there. Cassian is just agitated about this mission and, well, neither of us really trusts Kay to do as he’s told.” She recalled Jedha, when Kay had proven how disobedient he could be, half-heartedly following Cassian’s instructions with open doubt and a lot of petulance. It was an unusual attitude for a droid (even a reprogrammed one) . Bodhi gave her a small grin back. “It’s alright, Jyn.” He glanced cautiously around to Baze and Chirrut, whom were standing across the hold, presumably out of earshot, and continued speaking in a conspiratorial whisper. “Just not relishing the thought of being the third wheel for a few days. You know how they can get.” Jyn gave a small chuckle as she nodded her head. “I understand. We’ll be back as soon as we can.” As she walked out, wrapping her coarse scarf around her neck and over her hair, Chirrut’s voice drifted over, “You know, I heard that.” The last thing Jyn registered before stepping outside was Baze’s boisterous laughter as Bodhi sputtered out some sounds that were probably meant to be an apology. Jyn was going to miss them, even if it was just a few days.
* * *
Outside the freighter, Cassian and Kay had successfully unloaded the landspeeder and were checking the various meters and displays, making sure it was fully operational. When Jyn had strolled up alongside the vehicle, she saw someone approaching from a nearby house and nudged Cassian’s arm with her elbow to get his attention.Cassian followed where Jyn’s eyes pointed and muttered something not totally intelligible under his breath, (something about the luck of the recent paint job they’d managed to give Kay, hiding his Imperial markings) and without hesitation took Jyn’s hand. Jyn let her own face form into a mask, an old one of feigned innocence and ignorance. Just a weary traveler with no personal ties to any wars or rebellions or empires. She doesn’t look at Cassian, but knows he must be doing the same. Kay just stood expectantly, letting his visual receptors drift from Cassian to Jyn to the approaching figure and back again. Analyzing the situation , Jyn thought. She dimly wonders what the odds are that this will be nothing.“Hello!” the figure called in Basic, once it was close enough. Cassian gave a small smile and nodded in the newcomer’s direction. It was another human.“Saw you folks land, just wanted to come over and meet ya!” He was somewhat grey and middle-aged, but his eyes seemed to sparkle with genuine friendliness. Jyn thought with a pang of sadness that he was about the same age as her father had been. She wondered if they might have met before, but the thought was cut off by Cassian’s voice. Cassian maintained his smile as he spoke.“That’s very kind of you. My name is Joreth and this is my wife, Liana.” He cast an affectionate look in Jyn’s direction, to which she gave a convincingly coy smile. The cover of blushing bride was an easy one, made all the easier by her young age and younger appearance. People often mistook her for a teenager. “And this is our droid, C-5KL. We call him Kay for short, of course.” Cassian had learned the hard way that false names did not work for K-2SO, who had always been a terrible liar and was usually unresponsive to any name besides his own. Upon being introduced Kay gave an overly annunciated, “ Greet -ings,” and tried to wave stiffly like C-3PO. Jyn held in a groan. Kay was the furthest thing from a protocol droid imaginable, but no other cover made sense. They chatted with the farmer for a few minutes; his name was Danyar and he’d been on Lah’mu since the Clone Wars’ end ( so he might have met my father Jyn thought). He’d lost his wife to illness a few seasons back, but found companionship in the company of his neighbors and the communications from his two children, who’d left the planet years back, once they’d come of age. “Can’t say I blame them,” he sighed wistfully, and Jyn felt another pang, this time of pity, but Danyar seemed content with his uncomplicated existence. From what Danyar said, they were the first newcomers in over a year, not counting the occasional visits of traders and merchants that occurred each month. That’s good , Jyn thought, the Empire hasn’t been here yet . Cassian gave a convincing story of their desire to settle on the planet away from the discord ravaging the rest of the galaxy, hoping to lead a simple life and start a family (at which Jyn gave a convincing blush). They were there to scout out a spot to make their own. Danyar nodded, understanding. Their story was much the same as the other settlers who’d spread out across the plains of Lah’mu.As they talked, Jyn decided that Danyar didn’t pose any threat, but the facade they created was a necessary one, as much for Danyar’s protection as it was for their own. Jyn still thought it was a shame they had to lie. But the lie was a pleasant one, so she didn’t feel bad for too long. Eventually Danyar said his goodbyes and they parted amiably. Jyn wondered at his life as they watched him meander home. It seemed so… peaceful. If only it could have stayed that way for her own parents and herself.Once the farmer was out of sight Cassian gently released Jyn’s hand, curling and extending his fingers slowly. The warmth remained in Jyn’s own fingers for a good while afterwards. They made brief eye contact, but broke it quickly. “Okay,” Cassian said, “let’s go.”
|
10584042
|
Change of Pace
|
{
"Archive Warning": "Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings",
"Category": "F/F",
"Characters": "Akamatsu Kaede, Harukawa Maki",
"Fandom": null,
"Language": "English",
"Rating": "Mature",
"author": "by AceSparkleGirl",
"chapters": "1/1",
"completed": "",
"published": "2017-04-10T00:00:00",
"words": "2,473",
"Additional Tags": "Making Out, Alternate Universe - Non-Despair, Established Relationship, Public Scene",
"Relationship": "Akamatsu Kaede/Harukawa Maki",
"Character": null,
"Relationships": null,
"Series": null,
"Collections": null,
"Fandoms": "New Dangan Ronpa V3: Everyone's New Semester of Killing, Dangan Ronpa - All Media Types",
"Archive Warnings": null,
"Categories": null,
"Bookmarks": null,
"Chapters": null,
"Comments": null,
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"Words": null,
"Updated": null
}
|
The best thing, Kaede decides, about dating your best friend, is going shopping. Clothes shopping in particular, really- because nobody questions two girls ushering themselves into the same dressing room with two armfuls of various articles of clothing.
This, at least, is the thought in her mind as she carefully drags her girlfriend behind her by her free hand, balancing some ridiculous amount of clothing in the other.
It’s not as though she’s oblivious to Maki’s apparent distaste for the situation, however- she can tell so clearly by the way she’s got her cheeks puffed out as though she was offended by the sheer aspect of changing rooms. However, she makes no effort to resist going further, and that much is strikingly obvious as Kaee opens the door and tugs Maki in without second thought, fingers loosening at once from around her wrist in order to pull the door behind her. She hears Maki claim that they're
in
, and she nods in agreement.
With a click, it closes, and it's then that her hand moves up to turn the little lock before she reaches up to hang the clothes in her arms.
“Well!” She turns to Maki with a smile, taking her clothes and hanging them beside her own. “What do you say we try these on?” Clapping her hands together, she hums before she reaches carefully for a shirt, but she’s stopped by Maki’s hand over her own.
“What are we doing?”
Kaede blinks dumbly, head tilting to the side before she hums softly and smiles. “What do you mean?”
“We could have gotten two separate rooms. There were other empty ones. It isn’t like we-”
“It’s more fun this way!” Kaede chirps, successfully cutting her off. It’s a surprise that it actually shuts Maki down, but aside from that, she grins. The idea of trust was something that had taken longer than expected, but it was there in the way that Maki’s expression faltered and relaxed, and within a second she feels the grip loosen around her wrist.
It's then that Maki puffs out a sigh and turns her back to Kaede, her hands drawing up to carefully pull at the hem of her shirt, effectively tugging it up and over her head before bringing it forward to fold and carefully place on the little stool. All the while, however, Kaede's eyes are caught on her girlfriend. They're following up the length of her spine and over her shoulder blades when she rolls them back and straightens up. The way that the lace of her bra fits against her skin so
nicely,
and the color fits her so
well
.
Her eyes travel further, but they stop when she realizes that Maki is staring directly at her over her shoulder before she can even realize just how hard
she's
staring. There's a solid few seconds of silence before either of them speak up, but when the silence is broken, it's Maki.
“What,” she hums, eyes narrowing, “are you looking at.”
The phrase is so simple, and yet so
accusatory
that it leaves Kaede stunned while she conjures up some bullshit excuse. “Nothing!” she starts, voice coming out admittedly higher than intended. When all she gets is a raised eyebrow, she clears her throat and looks once again over her skin. “You're just pretty, that's all.”
Despite what she's pretty sure is a light blush, Maki seems to accept the answer as enough, and she's turning back around without so much as an answer. Kaede, however, doesn't stop staring. It's accidental, mostly, but when she feels almost disappointed at the point that Maki is tugging the new shirt on, she realizes that maybe she's enjoying this more than she should. It's just
trying on clothes
, she tries to think, but it doesn't make it easier to handle when Maki turns around for an opinion and Kaede wants the shirt to be… not there.
Maybe this was a mistake.
Kaede finally breaks after two shirts, turning on her heel in order to pull off her own top, folding it and setting it gently on top of Maki's before she tugs on the shirt she'd intended to try in the first place rather gracelessly. Smoothing out the shirt as she buttons it up, she huffs, turning again to Maki, who's standing topless with a shirt bunched up in one hand.
“How does it look?” she asks, gaze pointed down at herself and all too aware of the heat that's found a place against her cheeks. It fits well, she decides, but wearing
blue
feels odd to her.
“It
looks
like you're flustered.”
“What?” Kaede's head snaps up, and the blush deepens just as she swears Maki's lips curl into the faintest smile.
“You're blushing. You've been staring at me this whole time. You're not that swift, Kaede.”
Of course.
Leave it to Maki to pick that apart
, she thinks, hands falling to rest anxiously against her thighs, pressing her skirt into her skin. “Well,” she begins, chewing at her lower lip. “Can you blame me? You really are pretty.” She just wishes that they'd come here to try on new bras, too.
“Yeah, well, a department store changing room isn't really the best place to express how much you love me.” She notes that Maki is playing idly with one of her pigtails, and it tips her off to the fact that she's trying to distract herself when she puffs out her cheeks.
“And why not? I can tell you that as much as I want to, can't I? Because it's true, you know, and-”
“We're in a changing room,” Maki shoots back, hand still twirling a strand of her hair around as she looks up at Kaede.
“That shouldn't matter!”
“It does.” She drops her hair with the phrase, along with her hands, and promptly drops her skirt without a word. Kaede's left staring, again, and she swears Maki almost looks smug when she asks for one of the skirts they took from the racks. Maki doesn't turn this time as she pulls the skirt on, and takes it off within another second, claiming that it just fits weird while she pulls her own skirt back up long legs. It's shorter than the other, and Kaede has half a mind to thank
someone
for the fact that Maki chose to wear her thigh highs again today.
She's too aware of the fact that Maki's trying to make a point when she's looked up and down, and Maki sighs.
“Are you going to try anything else on, or are you going to keep standing there like an idiot?” she scolds, taking a step forward. And then another. And another.
Until she's standing right in front of Kaede, and her hands go right up to the collar of the shirt she's wearing.
“Maki-” she starts, but she's cut off when Maki clicks her tongue.
“I have to do everything for you, don't I.” She's caught watching Maki unbutton the blue shirt, too baffled to even try and argue before Maki is halfway down the row of buttons, and she brings her hands up to cup Maki's cheeks.
“No,” she manages, eyebrows furrowing. “No, you don't. What are you doing?”
Maki rolls her eyes as though Kaede said something absolutely ridiculous before she pulls her face back and continues unbuttoning the shirt, and it's then that Kaede realizes she's
blushing
.
“I'm helping you. God, Kaede, nobody takes that long to try on one shirt, you know. It's a wonder you get ready on time in the morning.”
Kaede's hands move up again, grabbing Maki's face before leaning in to kiss her. As soon as she pulls back, however, Maki's eyes flicker up, and her expression twitches. There's a moment that Kaede feels
afraid
, like she'd just made a mistake and she thought that Maki would just walk out of the stall, but she doesn't. Instead, the opposite happens, and Maki's leaning in to kiss her again. Oh.
The action is certainly not unwelcome, especially as Kaede returns the kiss with a smile, and she idly wonders just how long she's been trying to knock her down to this point. It feels like a stupid thought, though, and she tries to shove it to the back of her mind as she feels Maki's hand move back up the row of buttons and to her shoulder, the pads of her fingers soft against her own skin as the button-up is pushed off of her. There's no complaint as it falls to the ground in a blue pool at their feet, her only response being to wrap her arms around Maki's waist carefully. After a moment, it hits her that they're doing this- that they're in a changing room, in public, and they're making out...
And then her back is against the wall.
It comes without any warning, and her only answer is a sound against Maki's lips as she's pushed back, Maki's fingers wrapping wonderfully around her wrists and pushing down between her own. The affection is much appreciated, but Kaede can't help herself but wonder where it's coming from as she pulls back from the kiss just enough to breathe.
“Maki-”
“Shh. What are you doing? God, it's like you want to get us caught.”
“I- don't, that's not it, just-”
She's cut off with another kiss- chaste and quick against her lips while she squeezes Maki's hand. It only takes her a moment to forget about the clothes completely- and it's easy to do so when her hands break from Maki's in order to come up and around her, and they find bare skin.
Maki's answer is in the way that she leans in after taking a breath and presses a kiss to her neck. There's a gasp of air as she tilts her head into it, and she feels the lips against her skin pull up into a smirk. Dammit. Shifting in her spot, Kaede closes her eyes for just a moment as she adjusts herself, fingers curling against her girlfriend's back as her own pressed against the wall. Maki breaks away only to look at her carefully, as if she's being judged up and down, but within a moment, she's right back against her.
While Maki was particularly good at staying quiet, however, the same could not be said for Kaede.
Once one of Maki's hands comes up into Kaede's hair, Kaede lets a noise out into against her lips, her own hands trailing down to Maki's waist, fingers curling there desperately… and following suit was her knee coming up between her legs. She feels Maki tense, and there's a sense of odd accomplishment tugging at her chest as she feels her move closer into the kiss until her lips are parted and Maki's practically tugging at her hair. Everything feels so dangerous and high risk and Kaede
loves
it. loves the fact that they're doing this, loves that they're getting
away
with it, but mostly she loves
Maki.
And she doesn't even register Maki's knees between
her
legs until she's moaning into the kiss apparently loud enough to be a distraction, because she immediately feels teeth against her lower lip and she tugs back, surprised.
“...What?” The word is forced out almost breathlessly, chest heaving as she tries to catch her breath- catch up with herself and everything around her while her thoughts attempt to clear themselves of just how
much
there is happening.
“You're being loud.” Kaede's cheeks flush indignantly, whining softly as she shifts, because Maki's knee is suddenly down again, and it clicks in between fuzzy thoughts that she actually
really
liked that there.
“I'll be
quiet
, I promise.”
“Doubt it. Idiot.” Maki's leg comes up again, as if to prove a point, Kaede mashes her lips into a grim line, eyes closing before she draws in a breath and moves down against her. A squeak pushes past her lips, and the only way she can think to shut herself up is to sink herself into another kiss, which is quickly returned- until Maki's knee moves up and she whines again, and just like before, Maki bites her lip. It's not something that she's surprised at, really- they've been dating long enough for her to know that Maki's a
biter
, but it feels different when it's for the sole purpose of shutting her up.
However, they don't make her any quieter, as they're intended to. Each one is responded to with a quiet groan and rock of her hips against Maki's knee, her head knocking back against the wall. After the second time, she makes a conscious effort to instead
It's completely unexpected, when Maki pulls back entirely, reaching down for her own folded shirt from the bench behind her before she pulls it on, her hands pulling from Kaede's hair as they smooth over the material.
“We're done here,” she announces softly, looking up at Kaede expectantly when she holds her shirt out to her.
“What? No- why?” Kaede’s a bit embarrassed at just how
disappointed
she sounds, but she can’t brush it off, especially as she completely realizes that Maki’s dressed again and she’s draping the clothes that they haven’t even tried on over her arm. Tugging her own shirt back on, she drags her fingers through her hair, finding it all too frizzy and unkempt before deciding that that’s okay- for all anyone else knows, they’d just been trying clothes on.
“We’ve been in here long enough, and I want to get home,” is Maki’s response, looking Kaede up and down before she evidently decides that they’re both presentable enough to move to the door and unlock it before she pushes the door open and brings the clothes to the desk, draping them over the edge before she starts away, and Kaede is left hurrying after her as she fixes her shirt.
Once she catches up with her, her cheeks are puffed out, and she brings her hand once again through her hair to reassure herself that she’s at the very least presentable. “Come on, Maki, slow
down
,” she insists, reaching forward to grab her hand. Maki glances over her shoulder, pausing for just a moment to let her catch up before she’s walking again.
“I’m never going to go clothes shopping with you again, Kaede,” she decides, looking at her girlfriend as they start for the exit. Kaede pouts, squeezing her hand carefully.
“Come on, you don’t mean that.”
“I do.”
Kaede rolls her eyes as they exit the store, puffing out a breath. She knows it’s a lie just as much as anything else, but she goes along with it regardless, because it’s
Maki
, and that’s the thought in her mind as she leans over to press a quick kiss to her cheek.
“Whatever you say.”
|
10671711
|
The Walk to the Lake
|
{
"Archive Warning": "No Archive Warnings Apply",
"Category": "M/M",
"Characters": "Merlin (Merlin), Arthur Pendragon (Merlin)",
"Fandom": "Merlin (TV)",
"Language": "English",
"Rating": "General Audiences",
"author": "by the_one_and_only_one",
"chapters": "1/1",
"completed": "",
"published": "2017-04-19T00:00:00",
"words": "512",
"Additional Tags": "Angst, Reincarnation",
"Relationship": "Merlin/Arthur Pendragon (Merlin)",
"Character": null,
"Relationships": null,
"Series": "Camelot Drabbles, Reincarnation AU",
"Collections": null,
"Fandoms": null,
"Archive Warnings": null,
"Categories": null,
"Bookmarks": null,
"Chapters": null,
"Comments": null,
"Completed": null,
"Hits": null,
"Kudos": null,
"Published": null,
"Words": null,
"Updated": null
}
|
When Arthur was in Camelot, he enjoyed taking trips away from the castle, the fresh air and sunlight lifting his moods dramatically. Normally, Arthur’s hair shone in the sun, his skin would tan naturally and the metal of his chain would reflect the sunlight, making him look more angelic. Today, though the drizzle was light, it had already seeped through Arthur’s cloak and Merlin’s boots had started to make horrible squelching sounds with every step, reminding him he needed a new pair. They had walked through the forest behind Merlin’s home countless times, so when Merlin let Arthur take the lead he hadn’t expected him to take them to the lake. Arthur waded in until the water was knee-deep. Merlin knew he was thinking deeply, the habitual clenching of his jaw matched with his pouting lips was enough of a giveaway. Arthur’s hands were clasped in front of him, almost as if he were paying his respects to someone at a funeral, his head bowed. “I’m sorry.” Arthur said, after a while.“What for?” Merlin asked when he didn’t continue. Arthur held his hand out, inviting Merlin to stand to his right in the water. He took Arthur’s hand, the warmth from Arthur’s palm spreading through him. “I should remember more things, everything, but I don’t.” Arthur’s blue eyes turned to Merlin. “I only remember a little.” Merlin didn’t know what to say. They’d had this conversation countless times before Merlin broke down and told Arthur his story. This time however, was different. This time Arthur was talking about their private moments, the moments they shared in his chambers when the castle was fast asleep. He hadn’t told Arthur about those things. Arthur laced their fingers together, dropping his eyes to where their hands were joined. “Wha--what do you remember?” Merlin said, swallowing past the lump in his throat. “Little bits, like the way your eyes crinkle when you smile, and how you were always by my side, even if I pushed you away. How you taste.” Arthur looked to Merlin’s lips and Merlin swallowed audibly. He didn’t move back when Arthur took a step forwards; he didn’t flinch when Arthur’s hand reached out to his neck, fingers curling in Merlin’s hair at his nape, stroking ever so slightly. “I want to remember. Will you help me remember?”Arthur didn’t wait for a verbal answer, taking Merlin’s intake of breath as confirmation. The hand placed on Merlin’s neck pulled him closer as Arthur tilted his head to the right and leaned in, his gaze fixed on Merlin’s mouth. His lips pressed hard and urgent, challenging Merlin to reject him. Instantly, Merlin was transported back. Back to deserted corridors and dimly lit rooms with just the two of them. How Arthur made Merlin feel safe, not something to be feared.Before Merlin knew it, Arthur was drawing back. But Merlin didn’t want that. No, he wanted Arthur to stay -- stay close, stay here. So he pulled him in again by his waist and decided he would hold him; then, now, and forever.
|
10697235
|
augury
|
{
"Archive Warning": "No Archive Warnings Apply",
"Category": "Gen",
"Characters": "Billy Cranston, Trini (Power Rangers), Jason Lee Scott, Zack Taylor, Kimberly Hart",
"Fandom": "Power Rangers (2017)",
"Language": "English",
"Rating": "Not Rated",
"author": "by AngelOfBooze",
"chapters": "1/1",
"completed": "",
"published": "2017-04-22T00:00:00",
"words": "525",
"Additional Tags": "Psychic Abilities, Divination",
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1.Trini has her backpack slung over a shoulder. Her hair wisps around her head. Billy is waiting with her until her mum arrives. She had complained but he didn’t leave. She’s resigned to him now. Trini’s mother pulls up in her silver Subaru. Trini goes to put her bag in the back, and intends to follow it in. “No.” Billy is firm and his voice is scared. He points a finger towards the front of the car. “Ride shotgun today.” Trini nods. Doesn’t question him.Billy is curled up in bed watching his Lava lamp, Christian Kane singing through his headphones when his phone interrupts his bliss with a message. A text from Trini. The words are messed up, as if someone had taken a rake to them. It takes him a few moment to decode. The car had T-boned them as her littlest brother was complaining about it being his turn in the front. The entire front right of the car had been caved in. It would have broken her in ten places, burst her liver, snapped her neck, and pierced her lung if she hadn’t been a ranger.He doesn’t think what it would have done to her brother. 2.They’re laying on Jason’s bed when it happens. Jason is on his phone texting and Billy is fiddling with the blue tangle Jason had presented him with at the door. A name, pulled out of his throat and thrown between them like a freshly caught fish. Jason sit’s up a bit straighter at that.“Sorry.” Billy mumbles as he turns back to the mining magazine he’s brought with him. “No. No, Billy. What did you just say?” “Uh, I think Ahmed?” Jason crawls towards him, Billy puts the magazine between them. Jason backs off. “Why did you say that?” “I. Don’t know?” “My cousin just had a baby. She named him Ahmed.” “Oh.”Jason leans back. “Yeah.” 3.“Zack, go home.” They’re in the middle of math class. “What? Why, man?” Billy shoves him. The movement disrupts his pencils. “Go. Home.” The teacher looks at them. “He has to leave,” Billy looks at her intently, “Now.” Zack nods, confused.He finds her in time to call 911. 4.Kim shrugs her shoulders at the end of training. “I think I’m just gonna head home.” Billy reaches out for her hand. “I’ll come with you.” Kim shakes her head, pulling her fingers away from his. “I think I need to be alone tonight.” “I can be quiet!” he insists. Jason snorts behind him. “Can I at least keep you company until you get home? It’s no trouble” “It’s in the opposite direction to yours.” “So?” They walk home together, Billy makes her laugh, hugs her, and tells her he wants to see what she wears tomorrow,and she holds out another day. 5.A new kid at school. Curious eyes follow them from class to class. Curiouser words remain tucked under tongues. Their head is ducked, face hidden behind their emerald green hoodie as they sit hunched into a corner of the hall way. Billy reaches his hand down.“Come eat with us.”
|
10682829
|
PSA
|
{
"Archive Warning": "No Archive Warnings Apply",
"Category": "Gen",
"Characters": "Lena \"Tracer\" Oxton, Emily (Overwatch)",
"Fandom": "Overwatch (Video Game)",
"Language": "English",
"Rating": "General Audiences",
"author": "by bzarcher",
"chapters": "1/1",
"completed": "",
"published": "2017-04-20T00:00:00",
"words": "1,263",
"Additional Tags": "Mental Health Issues, Filming, Public Service Announcement, Helping others, Helping Yourself, Podfic Welcome",
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“You’re really sure about this?”
“I had to think about it for a while, but...yeah. I am.”
“I have to warn you that once this is out there, it’s out there. No turning back.”
“Never was very good about looking behind me.”
“That’s sort of funny.”
“Ha. I suppose it is.”
The shooting day started at six in the morning. Tracer was in her full gear - goggles, accelerator, jacket, pistols, the lot, and she ended up stripping half of it off to let the makeup artist take the little bit of lip gloss and a touch of foundation she normally wore when ‘working’ and dress it up for the cameras over the course of an hour before she was tooled up again and walking into the brightly lit studio. A white floor, a plain steel and black cushioned bar stool, a powder blue colored backdrop that her outfit popped against, and wouldn’t clash with the glow from her accelerator.They had a teleprompter next to the camera. The director for the shoot had gone over the script with her, but she hardly needed it. She stood just out of sight of the camera, and waited.“PSA shoot, part 1 take 1...aaaand action! ”In a flash of blue light, Tracer appeared in front of the camera.“Cheers, luvs! Tracer here!” She gave her best and brightest smile to the camera, eyes dancing as she struck a little pose. “You’ve probably heard everything about me. Fighter pilot, adventurer, hero!”Pulling out her pistols, she gave them a little spin and flourish on her fingertips as she spoke.“Shoot the baddies, save the world,” letting the pistols snap back into their holsters, she gave the camera a broad wink beneath her goggles, “and of course, get the girl!”She paused, then sat down on the stool, putting her hands on her knees. “But that’s only part of the story.”She locked eyes with the camera, holding it for a long moment until the director nodded. “CUT!”The director stood with a smile. “Good delivery - obviously you’ve got some practice projecting - mind if we do a couple more takes?”Nodding, she blinked back to the spot she’d originally started from. “Ready when you are!”The second part was harder, but she knew it would be.She’d gone back to the dressing trailer they’d set up, and she stripped down out of her gear, putting the vambraces and pistols in a gun case that she locked up, hanging her jacket up, and skinning out of her tights.She didn’t bother trying to scrub all the makeup off - Lena would leave that to the professionals - but after she’d changed into a plain white t-shirt and an old pair of jeans, she did her best to...not exactly tame her hair, that was basically impossible, but to put it into a slightly less aggressive style. She looked at herself in the mirror, unpleasant memories stirring as she gazed into her reflection. A little shiver ran through her, and she closed her eyes.“Come on, Lena. You wanted to do this. You can help people by doing this. You can do it.”She took a deep breath and left the trailer, heading to have her makeup redone.When she sat down on the stool again, she made sure to put herself in exactly the same position she’d sat down in for the first set of takes. The accelerator was sitting on a chair next to the camera dolly, and she felt terribly exposed.The background had been shifted to a more neutral grey. The lighting had been changed so that she’d still be picked up on camera, but it would all appear dull and flat compared to the bright, vibrant figure she’d seemingly cut a heartbeat before.Without foundation or other makeup, she knew she’d appear peaky and washed out on film. That was sort of the point.She took a deep breath, looked up, and locked eyes with the camera once again.“PSA, part 2, take 1... action! ” Her throat was suddenly very dry, and she had to swallow before she could speak.“I’m Lena, and...I had an accident.” She sat back a bit, drawing her arms up protectively. “Recovery was hard. For a long time, I didn’t really know what to do. I had trouble getting out of bed. I had times where I was making myself smile because I didn’t want people to know I could barely stand to be around anyone else. I couldn’t sleep. I didn’t really enjoy things I used to love, and I did…” She snorted softly, looking away from the camera. “I did a lot of stupid things. I thought that everything that had happened - everything I felt - was my fault.”She looked back into the camera, concentrating on the words on the prompter to keep herself from shaking.“I finally talked to my doctor about how I was really feeling. I asked for help, and things started to change. Nothing happened overnight - but I started to find the things I liked again. Really felt like the way I was acting. Wanted to go on.”She paused, knowing she needed to wait before finishing what she wanted to say.“CUT!” The director stood, and walked over before dropping into a crouch next to her. “I realize that wasn’t easy. Thank you. Would you prefer we just go with one take?”Lena considered how she was doing, then nodded. “If that’s OK…”
“It is,” the director reassured her, “would you like a minute before going back to makeup?” “Please.”When she came back to the set, the lighting was more neutral, though the background had not changed. She’d had foundation and eyeliner reapplied, and a neutral lip gloss. Enough to make her look ‘natural’ on camera, but nothing exaggerated. She was still dressed casually, but she'd pulled her jacket on, leaving it hanging open over the shirt.She settled back down on the stool, waited for the ‘action!’ call again, and smiled to the camera. Not quite the thousand watt Tracer smile. Just a good, genuine, ordinary Lena smile.“I still need help sometimes. I have friends I can call. A partner who supports me. A doctor and a therapist I can reach out to. But the most important thing is that I understand now that it is OK to ask for help.”Lena straightened up just a bit, letting her hands move as she spoke. “Depression is a serious illness, but it is not a death sentence. It is not a failing, and not a punishment...and most importantly, it is not something that anyone should have to face alone. If you are dealing with the effects of mental illness, see your doctor, or call the crisis hotline at the bottom of your screen.”She brought her hands together. “Life should be more than just getting by. Reach out. Find your words, and give yourself the chance to heal.”“You deserve it,” she insisted to the camera, “and you are not alone.”Emily’s arms were wrapped around her from behind as they watched the PSA play between commercials as they lay on the couch. It had been strange seeing herself - listening to herself - but as she watched the PSA play, complete with the addition of a few editing tricks and some music to tie everything together, Lena couldn’t help but smile.“That was incredibly brave, Lena. I am so, so proud of you.”“Thanks, luv.” Lena turned so she could kiss Emily’s cheek. “Thanks for being here for me.”“Always.”
|
10654050
|
Rumor Has It
|
{
"Archive Warning": "Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings",
"Category": "M/M",
"Characters": "Akashi Seijuurou, Kuroko Tetsuya, Mayuzumi Chihiro, Mentioned Nijimura Shuuzou - Character, Mentioned Mibuchi Reo - Character",
"Fandom": "Kuroko no Basuke | Kuroko's Basketball",
"Language": "English",
"Rating": "General Audiences",
"author": "by Irinrinrin",
"chapters": "1/1",
"completed": "",
"published": "2017-04-17T00:00:00",
"words": "819",
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Seijuurou invited Tetsuya for a dinner, but he was still on a business meeting. So Tetsuya had to wait in the hotel lounge. Seijuurou's meeting was in the meeting room on the third floor of the hotel. Tetsuya picked a seat in which he got the full view of the lift, so that he knew if Seujuurou finished his meeting. Tetsuya ordered vanilla milkshake, as usually he did.While on the wait, someone approached him. He was a tall man with a grey eyes and hair. Tetsuya could tell that the man was a business man just like Seijuurou. And he is a bit older than him."Do you wait for someone?" The man asked Tetsuya. Tetsuya looked at him and smiled."Yes." was his only answer. He observed the man carefully, assessed his intention."Oh, I am very sorry. That was rude of me, asking you without introducing myself. My name is Mayuzumi Chihiro." The man introduced himself and offered his hand for a handshake. Tetsuya stood from his seat and took Mayuzumi's hand."Kuroko Tetsuya. Nice to meet you.""The pleasure is mine." Mayuzumi smiled at Tetsuya. "May I sit here?""Douzo."Tetsuya was about to sit when the door of the lift opened. His attention suddenly turned to the men who were out from the lift. Tetsuya smiled briefly. Mayuzumi already sat, he followed Tetsuya's line of view. Seems like Mayuzumi failed to notice the change of expression Tetsuya had."Ah, the three most desirable men of Japan business world.""Do you know them, Mayuzumi-san?" Tetsuya asked once he sat and sip on his vanilla milkshake. Mayuzumi turned his face towards Tetsuya. "Well, I do. The rumors about them are not good, you know.""Rumors?"Mayuzumi looked at Tetsuya. He stared at him, tried to calculate the information he were about to spill. Then he sighed."Not all the rumors are bad, but I can assure you that it's not good to make acquaintance with them.""How so?""I'll tell you this cause it seems like you are a good guy and a beauty."Tetsuya smiled at the compliment Mayuzumi stated, "Why, thank you.""You see that black haired with feminine appearance? He is called Mibuchi Reo, my boss actually. He is a beauty, yeah. And he cares about looks. He is mean to people he has no interest with. He won't even care or look at them.""Isn't it a normal thing to do?""It is, but if you start blackmailing them just because you dislike how they look, can it be considered as normal too?”“... It must be hard on you.”“It’s part of my job.” Mayuzumi smiled at Tetsuya.“The second black haired there, he is Nijimura Shuuzou. He’s just back from America. He is a capable business man and has a cold hand. He handles business cruelly and strict. Rumor said that he held captive the person he loves and never let them outside the house.”“It’s... a bit creepy.”“Right? But Akashi Seijuurou, the red haired one, is just the same!”Tetsuya looked at Mayuzumi in wonder. “Why? He looks kind, I guess?”Mayuzumi looked back at Tetsuya then sighed. “Yes, he is. Actually, he is a gentleman.”“What’s wrong with being a gentleman?”“If I must say, he is way too perfect. He is a gentleman, he does everything perfectly, and he already has a lover!”Tetsuya chuckled, but what came to Mayuzumi’s ear was a sing-like bell. He blushed a bit.“You know what, he got confessed a lot, by men and women. But he turned them down. All of them. They said that he turned them down nicely. And when he turned them down, he said he already had a lover and didn’t want his lover to misunderstand. His lover must be a total beauty to make him head over heels for them.”“A total beauty, huh?” Tetsuya chuckled again.“But I never see he and his lover go out together, so no one really know he really has a lover or not.”Mayuzumi and Tetsuya looked at the three men, they walked towards them. Tetsuya stood up and smiled at Mayuzumi.“His lover is just an ordinary person, you know. As to why they never go out together is because his lover prefers to spend time alone with him.” Then Tetsuya came to Seijuurou.“Tetsuya.”Seijuurou smiled at Tetsuya. Once Tetsuya was within his reach, he put his hand on Tetsuya’s waist and pulled him closer. The next thing he did was giving Tetsuya a quick peck on his cheek as if it’s a second nature to them.“Did you wait long?”“Not really.”Tetsuya hugged Seijuurou and snuggled into his neck, sniffing Seijuurou’s scent. Seijuurou chuckled a bit.Seijuurou said his goodbye to the three of them and left with Tetsuya. The three of them, Mayuzumi, Mibuchi, and Nijimura, was left speechless with their jaws down.
|
10664361
|
Disintegrated
|
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"Characters": "Iwaizumi Hajime, Oikawa Tooru, Original Characters",
"Fandom": "Haikyuu!!",
"Language": "English",
"Rating": "Explicit",
"author": "by beneaththeskin",
"chapters": "1/1",
"completed": "",
"published": "2017-04-18T00:00:00",
"words": "4,528",
"Additional Tags": "Rape/Non-con Elements, it's quite graphic so anyone who may find this triggering beware please, Kidnapping, Hurt/Comfort, Injury, Slurs, Established Relationship",
"Relationship": "Iwaizumi Hajime/Oikawa Tooru",
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|
As I slowly start to come to, I feel the telltale touch of fingertips graze over my waist, the familiar soft pressure of fabric against my eyelids. My head feels hazy with almost a sense of vertigo, but my instinct to confirm it and open my eyes is cut short, as I’m reminded that I’m blindfolded.The sound of clicking footsteps can be heard echoing through the room, the location of it difficult to sense, the sharp click-click almost physically cutting into my inner ears, inevitably making me wince.My body feels inexplicably heavy and I want to call out to Iwa to stop for a moment and that I’m not feeling too hot – though I may or may not actually be sweating – but I find myself unable to reach out for him.As I flex my arms, I realize that my hands are tied above my head with rope.Something doesn’t feel quite right.Now that I feel the surface against my back, I’m certain this isn’t our most recent bed. It’s too solid and too cold, too heavy under my lying-down form.What clicks the strongest now are my arms – I’ve never had Iwa tie them. He knows I don’t like just lying there and doing nothing, useless. And I like to feel around along the lines of his form.Suddenly the footsteps are back, and a cold shiver runs down my spine through the haze in my mind.“You awake there, pretty boy?”The voice is awfully familiar yet awfully foreign to my ears. I can’t find my voice, or maybe I just can’t find the words.Something grips my chin, the sharp and rigid movement tearing a gasp out through my nose.“I said,” the voice grits with emphasis, “are you, awake.”As I somehow don’t succumb, the what I now feel are fingers digging into my jaw leave my skin, only to be replaced by what feels like the underside of a dress shoe.“You impudent little fuck.”The voice fades into a sneer, taking the clicking sound with it.The realization dawns now.
Well fuck.
I can already feel the ache in my bones in the background, the probable chemical haze apparently not affecting my tactile memories.My thoughts don’t move.
Iwa.
I feel the presence hover back over me, sickly smooth fingers pulling the waistband of my pants halfway down my ass and I have half a mind not to shimmy against it. The fingers drag my shirt up my stomach.
I’m sorry, Iwa.
I really don’t want to betray you.
As my mind protests, my muscles on the contrary relax.
Might as well have shot me up with something stronger.
No-no, this is nothing new. I’ve done this for years.This is nothing.The presence seems to find something amusing.“You think I’m gonna make you work?” it snorts. “After the shit you pulled?”I’m flooded with images of blood and bruises on my body, much gentler hands tracing over them. Long road trips. Cheap motel rooms. Hiding.Iwa’s careful hands on my sick fucking self. His reassurances that it’s nothing to be ashamed of, that I’m not dirty.
How long are you going to be able to say that with such confidence?
The hand is back on my waistband, shaking it roughly.“No, you slut. I’m going to brand you.”
Oh.
The image is clear. The voice’s self-proclaimed brand mark. A visual sign of shame.So would I rather take a dick or scorching metal?As if I had a say in the matter.“Who do you think built you up?”The voice is breathy with frustration. Something clatters loudly.“Everyone’s gonna know whose bitch you are.”The hand tears my pants further down, likely exposing me just for the emphasis. Or maybe not. You never know.Suddenly my head is full of Iwa’s face, his stunning smile that slips through his rough façade when we’re alone. His gravelly voice that speaks bluntly but never harsh.I almost smile through what’s coming next, the heat radiating through the air between it and my skin.The voice is infinitely thick with irony.“Scream for me, love.”The searing, blinding pain, however, doesn’t make me scream. My heartbeat is stuck in my throat along with my breath, shivers running through my whole body, the heat reverberating outwards toward my limbs. I feel like I can’t get any air, my lungs expanding and expanding.And I can just think of one thing only.
This is infinitely better than breaking his trust.
I almost want to laugh.
Is this it?
I feel like the voice is still saying something, but I can no longer make out the words, the sounds blending into each other and into my headache, which I still weirdly feel next to the heat in my abdomen.It dulls, heat and pressure melding together, air attempting to stutter out my lungs in vain.I feel the muscles in my thighs contract stronger than those in the rest of my body, belatedly realizing I’ve been digging my nails into my palms above my head.The laughing voice cuts into my mind, shrill and deprecating.“You sick fuck!”I realize that a little more blood than is imminently necessary has run between my thighs, reacting in a way that most would consider embarrassing.If you count the number of people that have fucked me, you’ll reconsider.In the back of my mind I think pain equals pleasure, but in a corner further back I realize that’s likely just years of self-conditioning.The heat drips over what must be a blotch of now-dead tissue in my abdomen, making the surrounding skin weirdly warm and sensitive, pulling my surrounding muscles tight.Clearly not satisfied with my response, the hand roughly grips my hip, pulling on it, my skin screaming in pain. No sound comes out of my mouth other than ragged gasps.“You’re not fucking free, you better remember that well.”I’m turned around the face the ground, if I could see it, and I want to support my body on my elbows so as not to have the injury graze against the surface, but I can’t move.
He’s going to kill me once he’s done pouring out his anger on me.
The realization hits clear.
He might not do it himself. He might leave me with the regulars that will now not have to worry about leaving me presentable for future customers.
I’m tired. I don’t want to think anymore.The hands are back, pulling my pants all the way down my legs.“You better not forget this feeling.”The voice sounds like gritted through teeth.“It’s all someone like you is good for.”Something else clatters, like a box against wood, if my mind is registering it right through the pounding in my skull.I wish I could pass out.I can’t move with the weight now holding down my legs, and something cold touches the underside of my ass. What I familiarly realize must be metal rips right through my flesh, making my insides clench in effort to hold it back, though halfway trying to just relax through it to minimize the strain.My muscles are tense all over with the effort to relax, feeling lightheaded with the extended lack of any proper breaths. I push my cheek into my bicep, clenching my teeth.It feels almost funny to me, with various parts of my body screaming for, well, something.Through the haze, an immense longing for Iwa’s gentle hand against my cheek strikes as the only thing I’ll really miss.The pain in my body is almost numb in its intensity.
Does this count as betraying you?
Through some delirious enigma I find my grating voice from inside some disintegrating place.
I don’t care anymore.
“’s that all you got?”A shrill laugh cuts through my skull with an impact hitting my ribs. Through the almost cotton in my head I hear the clicking of the shoes then step away from me, a door some distance away clicking open and slamming shut.I imagine Iwa’s soothing hands on me as my mind tries to shut off all the pain it’s feeling in the darkness. After what feels like an eternity, the door clicks again.My muscles weary from the shivering, I brace myself for what worse could happen. I clench my teeth and try to get some oxygen in my lungs as the steps approach. Something briefly grazes my shoulder, somehow this time making me flinch slightly.“Tooru,” a voice I would never mistake for another’s tries quietly, followed by an intake of breath.
Am I finally really delirious from the pain?
I just try to breathe as imaginary Iwa’s hand holds onto my wrist, untying the rope. The fingers catch my hair next, removing the fabric from around my eyes.I wait for a long moment to open them, and try to turn on my side to face him, pushing my palm against the floor next to my head. The metal grinds my insides disgustingly as I inevitably tighten the muscles in my abdomen. His hand holds onto my shoulder, and something drops inside my chest when my eyes land on his face.
You’re really here.
“I’m so sorry,” he whispers, his other hand hovering beside my head. “I promised I would protect you.”I want to lean into his palm but reconsider, the muscles in my face lax. I push up on my hands instead, gravity trying to hinder me, though I feel Iwa’s strong arm under my shoulders. I squeeze my eyes shut for a moment, trying to clear them of the haze, and reach my arm behind my naked back.I end up still leaning against his chest, my hand shakily pulling on the metal rod lodged inside my flesh.He tries to shh me, hand supporting my hip, thumb rubbing firm patterns into my skin. I can feel the slight shivering in him through my skin.I have to pull with quite some strength to get the rod moving, the metal pulling through my tightened muscles. It feels like I’m burning inside. I let the end of it just slide down with its own weight, my muscles twitching in discomfort, the rod clacking against the floor and rolling out of my hand.There’s dark blood all over the metal and on my hand, undoubtedly between my thighs too.My hands shake.I feel Iwa tighten his hold on me, and hear an intake of breath as if he has something to say, but something churns uncomfortably inside my head.I push at his chest and slowly rise to my feet, barely breathing through my open mouth but oddly steady, considering. I turn, looking for where I think the door is supposed to be, pulling at the hem of my jeans to be able to walk properly, starting towards it. I can’t quite pull them fully up, however, cringing and curling in on myself halfway.I feel Iwa’s hands on my arms, trying to still them, his chest settling against my back.“Did you-,” I have to breathe in between, “did you find a new motel?”I feel him tighten his hold, turning up my right wrist.I inspect the clotted blood sticking in between my fingers.“You-, uh,” he trails off, and I feel him gulp against the slope of my shoulder. “We need to get you to a hospital.”
Why is your voice so leveled?
I can feel my brows pull tight in mild confusion, worsening my headache.“It’s not that bad,” I breathe out, “I’ve had worse. It’ll heal.”
Nothing my ass hasn’t seen before.
I want to continue towards the door, but my attempt is utterly futile against the hold of his arms.
We should go.
“Wait,” he urges quietly, “look.”He supports under my ribs with his arm, holding up the hem of my shirt with the other.I look down at my abdomen in disbelief for a moment.It’s black.It looks charred, and I realize what the tight pulling sensation all this time was. I feel like a chunk of me is missing, like it’s not really there.He lets the fabric drop by down, and gathers my arm over his shoulders, seemingly attempting to gather my focus to his face.“Tooru. You need medical attention,” he speaks clearly, a tad bit like I needed to be spoken slowly to.Now that he mentions, I can feel my strength quickly evaporating.
Okay maybe this won’t quite heal on its own.
I huff out a breath, feeling vertigo all over again, though not quite feeling my abdomen and my hands. It takes a moment for me to come to another realization. I take as deep of a breath as I can, pushing at him with my free hand.“You can just leave me here.” My voice feels oddly not like mine.
I’m way too much trouble at this point.
I feel him twitch under my arm.I feel him gulp again, heavier. “I’m not leaving you.”If I wasn’t mostly limp, I’d want to laugh out. “You know why you should.”He knows what I am.There’s no changing it. No washing it off. You’re already dirty with my filth. Better wash it off quick, while you still can. While it still washes off.“It’s exactly why I won’t.”When I look, I see the muscles in his jaw clench, not quite sure how to interpret it. I’d protest, if I wasn’t so tired. I suddenly feel really heavy, gravity making it hard for me to stay upright.I open my mouth to tell him he’s an idiot, but I’m not sure if the words ever come out.My ears are ringing, and my eyes struggle to focus.I hold onto his arm, clenching my fingers in the fabric of his shirt. The next thing I know, I feel like I’m lying down. My eyelids weigh heavy, and my limbs feel really relaxed.My hand feels warm in a hold and I want to squeeze back, so I do. The hold tightens, and something rustles beside me. I notice everything around me feels really soft.“Tooru,” the voice is gravelly yet soft-sounding, “are you awake?”I feel like falling back asleep, but I want to hear more of that voice. I force out a hum that breaks sooner that I intended.A heavy sigh follows, and I feel warm skin on my forearm. Opening my eyes blearily, I see Iwa’s forehead leant on it. Apparently he’s sitting beside the bed.“I’m not dying,” I gulp, my throat feeling infinitely dry.I feel a breath of almost laughter on my skin. I notice a glass on the cupboard next to me, but my hand is currently adorably stuck.“Can you,” I try move my fingers a bit to get his attention, “pass me that water, please?”“Yeah,” he abruptly rises from his position, “of course.” He holds the glass for me, setting the straw between my lips.I take a few large sips, vaguely trying to clear my throat. I note the IV attached to my other arm.“Am I on like morphine or something? I feel really floaty.”I see Iwa’s gaze follow mine to the bag dripping liquid into my veins. He looks into my eyes, searching.“To be honest, I’m not quite sure,” he starts, looking somehow dejected. “You were in surgery. You’ve been asleep for over a day.”I think he can see the confusion in my expression, as he continues without me asking.“The burn went past muscle tissue, it needed surgical intervention,” he looks down at my lap. “They removed a piece of tissue from your thigh for skin grafting.”Everything feels like a vague dream for me. I look down at the blanket. I feel nothing but a dull ache, not quite sure where. I feel like the orangey streetlights are too bright, my vision swimming in and out of focus. My head almost lays itself back down on the pillow below it on its own.“You should sleep more.”I feel his hand on the slope of my neck, firmly squeezing, warm, making my eyes blink back to mostly open. I look up at his face. He looks distressed, eyes toggling between mine, the corners of his lips tugging up into a sad-looking smile.I want to comfort him.“Hey,” I softly tug at his black work shirt under his bicep to get him to lean down.He falls onto his forearms on either side of my head with a surprised hum, letting me kiss over his collarbone and up the side of his neck. I feel him suck in a breath, the steady thrum of his heartbeat under my lips. I snake my arm under his and over his shoulder, holding onto it, taking a patch of skin on his neck between my teeth to gently suck it into my mouth. I want to caress my other arm down his side, but the wire of the IV doesn’t let me.“Wait,” he breathes, pushing down on my shoulders and leaning up slightly.I look away when our eyes lock, pulling at his arm to lean towards it. “You’re stressed,” I softly kiss at his palm, sliding my arm down his waist towards the hem of his jeans. “Let me comfort you.” I lick a deliberate stripe over his palm for clarification.“Wait, wait,” he whispers, grabbing my wrist. He leans farther up, carding fingers through my hair, searching my eyes for something I’m not sure I want to be found. “We shouldn’t, you’re injured,” he adds quietly. I can see his chest expand with a sigh. “You don’t have to.”I suddenly feel raw, vulnerable, and I end up closing my eyes tight and turning my head to the side, muscles in my jaw clenching. I gulp with difficulty, trying to cancel it out.
Don’t think, don’t think.
I try to concentrate on the fingers still in my hair, his thumb rubbing down my temple. A fraction of something relaxes. I find my breathing oddly leveled.A pair of fingers leave the side of my head, and I feel him lean his head down into the slope of my neck. The words are muffled in fabric. “Sorry,” he nuzzles into my hair slightly. “I didn’t want to make you uncomfortable.“I continue just breathing for the moment, reaching my arm over his waist to pull him closer. I can feel him reluctantly put some of his weight on me, keeping clear of my stomach. The warmth against my cheek is comforting.A soft feeling bubbles up inside my chest at the confirmation that he remembers what I’ve explained to him of it – that eye contact can disconcert me sometimes, but that physical reassurance seems to help it somewhat. The last part I didn’t even know until I met him again after my years in the rabbit hole. I thought he’d forgotten about me.Although the me from back then no longer exists.A sore part of me feels that now that I met Iwa again, these years almost don’t matter. I’d do it again, if I needed to to be here now.Then again if you offered me to die right this minute.Well.“It’s fine,” I push my lips into his hair, breathing in his scent. It feels almost mixed with dust, but it’s there.I fall asleep peacefully, to the feeling of familiar strong arms enveloping me. My days in the hospital are slow and oddly calm, Iwa staying with me throughout the days. I have no idea how he talked the hospital staff into letting him stay past visitation hours. I hear him speak to his team about something like a renewal of my witness protection program. We share some of the hospital food, as I’m barely hungry anyway, and someone from his team brings over supplies a few times.Most of the time we just lie down together, Iwa playing with my hair or caressing down my neck, or me drawing words on his arm that he has to guess, or kissing at his palm or his knuckles. Or him hovering by me while I’m on my way to the bathroom, no matter how many times I assure him that I haven’t lost my ability to walk.These days feel strangely fragile.When I’m released from the hospital, we take what he calls a tactical reroute north to change vehicles, to eventually make our way southwest to a government-funded safehouse.How he even found me and what he did to them, I still don’t know. His team may be dealing with them, or they may be dead. I didn’t want to know, so I didn’t ask.We make our way up the building, Iwa carrying our things and trying to support me while I try to scale the steps. I push my hand on my sweatpants right under the large dressing there, stepping slowly, as curling my knees pulls at the injury at an awkward angle.“Do you want to wait here?” Iwa ask with a worried expression. “I can take the things upstairs and come back for you.”“Nah,” I huff. I don’t feel like it’s actually agitating the injury, it just makes me defensive of it.As we make it to the third floor of the concrete building, Iwa makes to open the heavy metal door. The view inside is surprisingly light, compared to what I was expecting of a safehouse. There isn’t much furniture here, and it’s an open one-room apartment, but really anywhere is fine as long as I’m allowed to be there with him.Iwa secures all the locks on the front door, moving to put our things away. I go to carefully sit myself down on the couch and lie back, tracing my fingers over the hem of my loose sweatpants. After a while, Iwa comes to sit down next to me, and I turn to lie on my back with my head in his lap, with a lot of help from my arms so that I use my abs very minimally. I fold my knees and rest them against the back of the couch.He rests his arm over my collarbone, running his fingers through my hair, away from my forehead. I feel comfortably sleepy under his touch, closing my eyes for a minute. I feel his other hand move towards the side of my head, trailing his fingernails behind my ear. I open my eyes to look up at him, finding fond-looking eyes in return, my heartbeat picking up slightly.I reach an arm up for his shoulder, giving it a gentle squeeze, rubbing patterns into his skin over the fabric. I turn my cheek towards his stomach, breathing in deeply. It still sort of feels unreal that we’re here, like this.I’ve never been treated this gently, this sincerely. It feels foreign.The words leave my mouth before I can think to stop them.“Can I ask you something very honestly?” I press a half-kiss on the fabric over his stomach.The fingers in my hair stop for a moment, both returning to brush the strands off my face, settling his palms flat beside my forehead. “What is it?” the voice is softly grating.I take a deep breath, deciding to look at him straight on this time, in hope of reading his reply more than hearing it. I try to keep my voice unanimated. “You don’t really find me attractive, do you?” I half-regret the words right as they come out. “I mean, you don’t really want to have sex with me.” Or maybe deep down you do detest what I’ve done.I see his expression drop, and he opens his mouth only to close it, pressing his lips tight. “To be honest, I don’t really know how to answer.” He bites at his lower lip. “I feel like I shouldn’t really compliment your looks here, because I’m not with you for sex.”I don’t really know how to register that, so I just hum in thought.“I mean, I really don’t want to pressure you, like,” he trails off with a shaky sigh, “I don’t want you to do anything you don’t like, or aren’t comfortable with.”“But I like sex,” I reply automatically.“What I mean is, I want you to know that you don’t have to like it. It’s not a requirement.” His thumb rubs gentle circles into my temple, our eyes inexplicably locked, perhaps due to my incomprehension. “Like, the fact that I care for you immensely isn’t affected by whether, or what, we do, in that sense.”My gulp reflex is uncomfortable in my throat, forcing me to turn towards my side with the help of both my hands and Iwa’s arm. I hug his thigh, facing away, pressing my cheek into it. “So, you don’t, like-,” I half-choke on my words, “you don’t think I’m-”“I don’t think anything negative of you,” he squeezes my shoulder.I find that incredibly hard to believe.“I think we should only do it if you really want to,” he presses firm patterns into my shoulder. “And if you don’t, and we never do, then that’s fine too.”I almost want to laugh, gulping again instead.“And if, if any of this is uncomfortable,” he gestures to the hand he has on my shoulder, “please tell me, okay?”I breathe out slowly, deliberately. “Okay.”I myself doubt I would.But I can try.I’m reminded of the last time we had sex, which feels like a lifetime ago somehow. The blindfold habitually on my eyes to cut off the surroundings, which helps ease my racing mind somewhat. Helps make it less likely that I’d dissociate, with nowhere for my eyes to stop and fade out. Where he is only clear from our points of contact, the slight sound of rustling fabric, the feel of his breath on my skin.His body along mine, the heat of his mouth, his skin under my hands.Just our heartbeats.Yet I’ve never had penetrative sex with someone I like. I have no idea how that would feel.I mean, I can’t even properly look him in the eyes sometimes.What if, if we did that, I’d feel differently about him somehow.Even though I was ready to do it all this while, he just never went with it, keeping to other types of sex.I keep thinking that it doesn’t even matter how I feel about this.If he’s happy, I’m happy that he is. Yet he keeps making me feel like I matter. I want to believe him.I huff out a sincere laugh. “I think we’ll be alright.”Iwa leans down to kiss my temple, hugging me with one arm, stroking my hair with the other.Here in the arms of the person dearest to me, injured yet alive, covered by the evening sunlight pouring in from the window of our safehouse.I have never felt safer.
|
10669320
|
Kisses Forbidden On Lips
|
{
"Archive Warning": "No Archive Warnings Apply",
"Category": "M/M",
"Characters": "Thomas Barrow, Jimmy Kent, Alfred Nugent",
"Fandom": "Downton Abbey",
"Language": "English",
"Rating": "Teen And Up Audiences",
"author": "by Tortellini",
"chapters": "1/1",
"completed": "",
"published": "2017-04-19T00:00:00",
"words": "500",
"Additional Tags": "Homophobia, Period-Typical Homophobia, Period Typical Attitudes, Implied/Referenced Homophobia, Internalized Homophobia, Homosexuality, Male Homosexuality, Canon Gay Character, Gay Male Character, Romance, Angst and Romance, Hurt/Comfort, Hurt, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Emotional Hurt, Hurt No Comfort, Sorry Not Sorry, Angst and Hurt/Comfort, Unhappy Ending, The Author Regrets Nothing, The Author Regrets Everything, I'm Sorry, Canon Compliant, Character Study, Wordcount: 100-500",
"Relationship": null,
"Character": null,
"Relationships": "Thomas Barrow/Jimmy Kent, Thomas Barrow & Jimmy Kent, Thomas Barrow & Alfred Nugent, Jimmy Kent & Alfred Nugent",
"Series": null,
"Collections": null,
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"Archive Warnings": null,
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}
|
Thomas Barrow sat in the Servants hall for a few moments after he had spoken to James, his cigarette dying between his fingers. He wasn't thinking about that though.
For once the younger man wasn't all prissy and showy like he usually was; he didn't look on edge or uncomfortable. He looked...like himself. The two of them relaxed in each other's company, laughing a little and smoking...
And oh, Jimmy Kent was beautiful. In every way possible. Physically, he was built like Adonis himself. Golden waves that fell with casual grace of his forehead, without seemingly any effort; blue eyes that twinkled with good natured mischief; and a lean, hot body, complete with muscles and dimples.
Thomas went to his room and tried to go to bed. He knew it was risky, so don't you dare say he acted like a child. But thoughts of the other man wouldn't -- couldn't -- leave him.
He knew it was wrong too. He knew it was disgusting and heathen and so horribly wrong. But if Jimmy felt the same way...then it wouldn't be so bad, right? It wouldn't be so physically painfully
lonely
this time...
He needed someone. He couldn't be this lonely forever. Hell, he didn't deserve this!
And he loved Jimmy. He loved him more than he ever loved anyone before.
So he stood up before he knew what he was doing. He walked to his bedroom door...
Jimmy Kent was fast asleep in his bed after a hard day's work. He was dreaming...of before the war. His conversation with Mr. Barrow, about his family and how he no longer had anyone left, must've triggered something. He was drained too, in his dream—he hopes he doesn't wake up crying.
Suddenly he felt a pressure on his lips.
What did it equal to in his dream? At first a past girlfriend, gone from his life like everyone else; but then because of that, he suddenly couldn’t breathe—it was like the trenches all over again—oh god—
He opened his eyes in a panic and—oh god!
"Get off—of me!" he managed, and all but fell off of his bed. He subconsciously wiped his mouth across his sleeve, his tongue too... How disgusting, ungodly, repulsive...!
"Jimmy?" Alfred squeaked in the doorway.
"Alfred, I
swear
it's not what it looks like." he said desperately.
Thomas Barrow stared at him. Mr. Barrow, his friend; a man with wit and ambition; a man he admired (well not anymore). He looked lost, and shocked, and—honestly? Heartbroken. He reached out for Jimmy, who backed away, shaking his head in wordless anger.
"Get—get out!"
"But what about all the things between us? What about all the things you said?"
"The only thing between us is my
fist
in your face!" Jimmy snarled, and the older man flinched. "And I said nothing but get out—go, Thomas!"
He shoved him out of the bedroom and slammed the door as hard as he could.
|
10622379
|
Who are you
|
{
"Archive Warning": "Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings",
"Category": "M/M",
"Characters": "Keith (Voltron), Lance (Voltron)",
"Fandom": "Voltron: Legendary Defender",
"Language": "English",
"Rating": "General Audiences",
"author": "by nadagio",
"chapters": "1/1",
"completed": "",
"published": "2017-04-14T00:00:00",
"words": "933",
"Additional Tags": "Pre-Canon, Galaxy Garrison, One-Sided Attraction, Rejection, Teen Angst",
"Relationship": "Keith/Lance (Voltron)",
"Character": null,
"Relationships": null,
"Series": "Memory Of You",
"Collections": null,
"Fandoms": null,
"Archive Warnings": null,
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"Chapters": null,
"Comments": null,
"Completed": null,
"Hits": null,
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"Published": null,
"Words": null,
"Updated": null
}
|
“Hey, Lance!”Down the hall, Lance stopped and looked around. When he saw Keith, the boy seemed confused. Understandable. Keith had never been the one to seek out his company before. It was always the other way around.But Keith had been thinking things through, and he made his decision.“Keith?” Lance spoke his name like a question, sharing a glance with the cadet beside him. Hank, maybe? Keith wasn’t good with names. Or faces. Or people, really.“Yeah. Hey,” Keith said, approaching. “Can I talk to you?”Lance narrowed his eyes and frowned. “What? Why?”“I just want to ask you something,” Keith said, his tone a bit short. He eyed Lance’s friend. Could Keith do this with an audience? It seemed like that would be awkward.“Um, hi. I’m just gonna… go, then,” Maybe-Hank said, already edging away. “Bye.”“Wait- no!” Lance yelped, reaching out. But his friend was gone, and they were alone. Lance crossed his arms and turned back to Keith. “Ugh. What do you want, then?”“To ask you if...” Keith hesitated long enough to take a full breath. Was he really going to do this? Yes, yes he was. “If you want to go into town with me this weekend. Grab some food or whatever.”There was several moments of silence, during which Lance contorted his face into something that might have been puzzlement or disgust or nausea.“...You want to go into town. With me. And eat food.”“...Yes.”Lance leaned in to examine Keith carefully, eyes darting across his face like the meaning of the universe could be read in his pores.“Why!?” he asked finally. His confusion was confusing. Lance wasn’t usually this dense, was he?“So we can spend time together?” Keith said slowly. “Have fun? You know. Date things.”“DATE!?” The pitch of Lance’s voice could be described as piercing. “You’re asking me out on a date?”“Yes.” Keith shifted uncomfortably, crossing his arms. How was he supposed to interpret that response? “So?”"Why are you asking me out on a date?” Lance had recovered from his surprise and returned to conveying deep suspicion.“Why are you asking so many questions? It’s a simple yes or no, Lance!”“Dude. I’m just confused. Don’t you hate me?”“No. Don’t you like me?”“WHAT!!?” Lance literally jumped back several feet. His face flushed, and he looked around at the few others in the hall who had startled at his screeching. He then rushed back in to whisper, “Keith! I don’t- why would you think I like you?”“Well,” Keith raised an unimpressed eyebrow. “Maybe because you’re always staring at me? Coming up to talk to me? Trying to get my attention? Are you saying that you don’t?”“No! I mean, yes I don’t like you!” Lance said, waving his hands around to emphasize his denial. “You’re my rival, Keith. I want to be better- I mean, I am better than you. I keep an eye on you ‘cause you’re the enemy. Taunt you so you know how much better I am!”“Oh.” Keith felt something heavy curling in his gut. Sour and discontent. “That’s stupid.”“No, you’re stupid!” The comeback was immature, and their whole conversation was devolving into something stupid.“Whatever,” Keith muttered. He turned to leave. “Nevermind.”“But- wait! You were-” Lance paused. Then gasped theatrically. “You asked me out on a date. Does that mean you like me?”“No.” Keith felt his shoulders rise with defensive tension.“You do!” Lance crowed. He wiggled a little dance. “Keith! Oh, man! I know this handsome face gets the ladies swooning, but I didn’t know it could get the great-”“Shut up, Lance!” Keith turned back to snarl at the boy. “I don’t hate you but I definitely don’t like you either.”Keith stepped closer to get in his face. To make sure each word hit home. To make sure Lance hurt like Keith did.“You just seemed so desperate. So pathetic,” he sneered. “I thought I’d do you a favor and take pity on the poor idiot who liked me. But it turns out you don’t. Even better. No need for me to waste my time.”Lance paled at the start of his rant, but by the time Keith was done the boy’s face twisted into something bitter.“Yeah, glad we got that cleared up,” Lance said, voice dark. “Wouldn’t want to waste your time.”Without another word, Keith walked away. Stride carefully controlled to be normal, not running or stomping.Lance didn’t approach him after that, and Keith told himself he was glad. He told himself that the glaring didn’t bother him, that he didn’t want to spend time with an immature idiot anyway, that he was better off without someone who saw him as the enemy and made fun of his feelings.Then Shiro was gone, and Keith got kicked of school. Months of living on his own in the desert with only his theories and a weird energy to keep him company, and Keith told himself he was done feeling hurt about petty things like self-absorbed boys.Until one night more than a year later in the middle of rescuing Shiro from the Galaxy Garrison, a self-absorbed boy walked back into his life. A little taller, his face a little thinner, and hair a little longer.All the hurt and resentment bubbled back up and poured out of his throat as feigned ignorance.
You think I care about you? You think your words matter to me? No.
“Who are you?”“Who am I?” the boy huffed. “Uh, the name’s Lance.”
|
10632219
|
Heatwave Honorary Gotham
|
{
"Archive Warning": "Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings",
"Category": null,
"Characters": "Mick Rory, Leonard Snart, Iris West, Laurel Lance, Selina Kyle, Pamela Isley, Harleen Quinzel, Kendra Saunders, Linda Park, Felicity Smoak, Lisa Snart, Lashawn \"Shawna\" Baez, Diana (Wonder Woman), Jesse \"Quick\" Wells, Lily Stein, Raven (DCU)",
"Fandom": null,
"Language": "English",
"Rating": "Teen And Up Audiences",
"author": "by jaguarsp0tted",
"chapters": "4/?",
"completed": "",
"published": "2017-04-15T00:00:00",
"words": "10,980",
"Additional Tags": "Fluff, mick rory positivity, mick and all his lady and or partially female identifying friends, y'all this is just a series of mick being friends with women. that's the literal only point of this, More characters to be added, Mentions of past sexual assault, Mentions of past child abuse, Mentions of past abuse, mentions of past rape, NOT legends friendly, seriously the legends team is not presented really sympathetically at all, Nonbinary Mick Rory, bigender laurel lance, whoo boy there are very few cis straight characters in this, neurodivergent characters, Mentally Ill Characters, mick rory has ptsd, a few characters do tbh, goldenvibe at one point, westallen mentions, Trans Lisa Snart, Everyone Loves Wonder Woman, i literally just keep adding female characters from across the dcu",
"Relationship": "Mick Rory/Leonard Snart",
"Character": null,
"Relationships": null,
"Series": null,
"Collections": null,
"Fandoms": "The Flash (TV 2014), Arrow (TV 2012), DC's Legends of Tomorrow (TV)",
"Archive Warnings": null,
"Categories": "Gen, M/M",
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}
|
Ow! Shit!”“Oh, shit, I’m sorry, miss, I didn’t-”Iris looked up at the man who’d knocked her over, eyes wide. Mick looked down at the girl he had knocked down, currently kneeling next to her in an attempt to help her up, eyes even wider.“You’re Heatwave.”“You’re Iris West.”“Yeah.”“…..Huh.”They stared at each other for a few moments before Mick blushed deeply, ducking his head down. Iris was baffled. Did she just intimidate one of the most renowned violent criminals in Central City?“’m sorry for knocking you down, I wasn’t looking where I was going.”“It’s…okay. Um. I think I made you drop your basket, I’m sorry.”Mick looked at the black plastic basket on the ground and shrugged, grabbing it and Iris’ purse and standing, holding his hand out to her. Iris took it, gripping his wrist and letting him pull her off the ground. He handed her purse back to her and she narrowed her eyes at him.“So…uh….you’re not gonna rob this place, are you?”“What? No, I like this store too much. And I don’t really do jobs without Le-um. Captain Cold.”Iris laughed. “I still can’t believe those were the names you got.”Mick smiled-wow, his normal, not ‘I’m about to commit a felony’ smile was pretty handsome-and laughed a little. “You’re telling me, lady. Our last stint in prison was fuckin’ hell cause of that. Do you know how may guys I knocked out for saying shit about them?”“I’ll have to tell my friend that came up with them about that, I’m sure he’ll be pretty happy to hear it.”Mick shook his head, smile still in place. Iris tilted her head at him. “So, can I ask what one of Central City’s most well known criminals is doing at a Lush store?”Mick snorted. “As long as it don’t end up in the paper.”“As much as I’m sure the upstanding citizens of this city are dying to hear about your nightly bath routine, I promise, just between you and me.”Mick sighed and looked around. “Lenny ran out of a bunch of shit, or what we had expired while we were-” Mick frowned, hands twisting of the handle of the basket- “while we were gone. Uh. On that work thing.”“Ohhh. That work thing. Um…so you guys are done with that?”Mick squeezed the plastic in his hands tighter. Iris looked between his hands and his face.“Uh. Yeah. It-it didn’t work out.”It wasn’t hard to figure out that something had happened that had caused him some kind of lasting distress. Iris bit her lip. “I’ve never been in here before.”Mick looked like she’d cured all his woes by dropping the subject. “Yeah? What made you come in?”“Ugh, I need a new soap. The one I use on my face has started drying out my skin really bad and it sucks.” Mick tilted his head and blinked at her. “Oh. Here, I know what you need. Me and Len both use it. I gotta keep my face from breaking out or I pick at it.”“Oh my gosh, I know someone who does that, too. It’s so hard to break that habit.”Mick showed her around, telling her all about the different products and showing her what he was buying-a pile of bath products (for Len, apparently Len liked pretty baths), massage bars (they both had terrible joints and muscle pains), and some perfume (’What? A man can’t smell like carnations?’)-and Iris ended up with a basket as full as his. They stood together in the checkout line, talking about anything that came up. “Hey, you want me to get that for you?”Iris smiled at him. “You mean buy all this? Why?”Mick shrugged. “It’s a nice thing to do?”“Why would you care about doing nice things? Especially for me, of all people?”Mick frowned, cheeks turning bright red.“Cause I’m not as big of an asshole as people usually think I am. If you don’t want, I won’t, but-”“I’m sorry. I said that…less well than I could have.”Mick had pulled in on himself, making his large frame seem smaller, meeker. What the hell had happened to him?“It’s cool. If anyone understands saying shit badly, it’s me.”Iris bit her lip, hesitantly reaching out and placing her hand on his arm. He tensed for a moment, glancing down at her hand. “I’m sure my bank account will thank you, Mick.”He let out a deep breath and visibly relaxed-Iris’ inner reporter was dying to ask questions, and she would once she got home. Mick smiled at her, a small, weak smile. “I’m sure it will, kid.”—“-and so then-then, holy shit-Barry just. Jumps. He just jumps off the roof, and everyone is watching like, in fucking horror, but I’ve got the camera out and I didn’t even get a good video because I was laughing too hard. I mean, Barry is just-I love him, don’t get me wrong, I do with all my heart, but I am so happy he started working on his impulse issues cause he would still be doing shit like that on stupid bets if he didn’t.”Iris laughed a little at herself. “Not that he doesn’t still do a lot of things without really thinking them through.”Mick sipped at his soda, shoulders shaking in a quiet laugh. They’d decided to go to lunch; neither was in a particular rush and both were having fun. Iris took a bite from her sandwich, flipping her hair over her shoulder. Mick was actually a fun guy to hang out with-he was funny, had a quick wit, and was leagues smarter than Iris had thought, though he was smarter in different ways than some people she knew. Still, the fact that he was able to list off almost every great fire in history and its cause was just…impressive. Though he’d blushed and ducked his head down, apologizing quietly for going on about something like that, to which Iris had told him that she was used to it, as she had quite a few friends who liked to talk about things that were very important to them, sometimes for hours on end. “Yeah, but he’s a good kid. Could probably stand to go to therapy, but hey, I ain’t judging.”Mick was also very blunt, and that was a refreshing change. “I know, I’ve been thinking about bringing that up with him.”Mick raised an eyebrow at her. “Yeah?”“Yeah, I just…I don’t know how, you know? I mean, how do I tell him that I think he’s started going back to doing dangerous things that could get him hurt? I know because of his…other job, he doesn’t necessarily always have a choice, and he’s always gonna be the guy that runs into the burning building, and I love that about him, but I just. I don’t know.”Mick was quiet for a moment, fingers drifting under this sleeve and picking at the scarred skin there. “I can give you my therapist’s number, if you want. She’s…friendly to different…jobs, like his. I had to start going again cause-” Mick shivered- “of what happened on my outing, and it’s not an easy thing to bring up with someone. Lenny was freaked out cause he knew I needed it, but didn’t know if I was okay enough to go back. But Iris, you just have to tell him. Ain’t much else you can do, other than that. Make sure you’re both in a comfortable place-or in a car, it’s good to bring this shit up in cars-and just say ‘Hey, I think maybe it would be a good idea for you to start seeing a therapist, even just for one session’. And you might have to try a few different people, and he might need alternative forms of therapy. It’s a hard start and you guys might fight about it-God knows how many fights me and Len got into when I tried to get him to go-but if you think he needs it, you just need to be honest.”Iris sighed, looking at her hands before smiling at Mick. “Thank you. I feel like no one else really gets where I’m coming from on this. My dad told me to just ‘leave it alone’. How can I leave it alone? I’m already scared for Barry in general, but then when he starts-when he has less control over his decisions, and sometimes that’s not even a bad thing, but when that bleeds over to his other job, he could get-”Iris closed her eyes, feeling the sting of tears threatening to fall. She felt a warm, large hand cover hers. “Hey, I get it. This is a hard thing to deal with, kid, for you and Barry. Impulsiveness like that can be a blessing and a curse. I think the most i can tell you is to be happy he’s running into the burning building for the reasons that he is. It’s…it’s better than the reasons I have, I can guarantee that.”Iris sniffed, opening her eyes and turning her hand over, squeezing Mick’s for a moment. “I think I will take that number, for your therapist.”“No problem, kid. She’s pretty cool, you’ll like her. Her wife is a scary, scary woman though. Best cook you’ll ever meet, but just. Scary.”Iris snorted, laughing and squeezing Mick’s hand again. She appreciated that he squeezed back.—Mick opened the door to reveal a crying Iris West. He looked her over; her hair was loosely tied back, she had no makeup on, and was wearing comfortable clothes. “You and Barry had a fight.”Iris opened her mouth the speak but no words came out, just a sob. She covered her face with both hands and Mick held his arms open, letting her come closer until he could wrap them around her, her head tucked under his chin. “Shh, shh, I got you, kid, I got you.” “Mick? Baby, who was that at the door?”Mick heard his husband walk up behind him, cane tapping on the floor with each step. Len stood next to Mick, exchanging a look. “I’ll go make up the guest room. You come in when you’re ready.”Mick turned his attention back to his friend as Len walked away.And Iris was that: a friend. Ever since their run in at the mall a few months ago, they had began a habit of hanging out a few times a month, texting and calling each other when they couldn’t see each other in person. She was a nice, good young woman, and they understood that they were on very different sides of a moral spectrum, and managed to be friends despite that. Mick had to imagine the fact that he and Len had re-agreed to a ‘no killing unless it is absolutely necessary to prevent immediate harm to themselves or others’ rule probably helped.Mick led her inside the house, tossing her small bag over his shoulder. He kept one arm around her on the way to the living room. They sat on the couch, Mick running a hand up and down her back while she leaned on him. “I’m sorry, I-I know it’s late, and I should have called first, I just-” Iris laughed and shook her head- “I don’t even know why this is the first place I thought to go.”Mick squeezed her shoulder gently. “Cause ever since Barry stayed here for a while, you guys recognize the farm as a safe space with no judgement that’s always open when you need it.” Iris laughed and looked up at Mick. “You really are so much smarter than people give you credit for.”Mick shook his head, small smile teasing at his lips. “I ain’t anything special, Iris. Now you gonna tell me what’s up?”Len came into the room, sitting a distance away from them on the couch. “Iris, would you like something to drink?”“Tequila?”Len smirked at her. “Maybe later, but I think you need to be in your right mind right now.” “Yeah. Um, some water would be really nice, thank you.”Len smiled at her-a small reassuring thing, and stood, leaning on his cane on his way to the kitchen. Iris began talking once he returned. “It was…I don’t know. He and my dad both just-they just pissed me off, you know? I brought up these really, really good points about something and they just didn’t listen to me at all, even when it turned out I was right, and it just feels like they don’t-they don’t respect my opinion, and it’s such bullshit!”One thing Iris enjoyed about being at the farm was that Mick and Len encouraged being honest about feelings and not holding back. She knew she could say what was on her mind without worrying about being interrupted or talked down to or invalidated. “I mean, I get it, I’m not a cop or a fucking superhero, but I’m not an idiot. I know what I’m talking about. I don’t know why they don’t seem to get that.”Iris took a drink of water, frowning and feeling the urge to punch something. “Wanna hear what I think, or you wanna keep going?”Iris turned to look at Mick. “No, I wanna know.”Mick sighed, running a hand back over his scalp. “I think that’s bullshit, first. You’re smart and intuitive and it’s stupid that they don’t realize that. I think your dad does it cause parents pretty much never respect what their kids think-and I’m not excusing that, it’s a horrid fuckin’ practice and something parents need to work on-but you know what I mean? He’s got it set into his head that no matter what, he knows better than you. I think it’s different with Barry cause Barry ain’t really his kid, but-and I hate to say this-but I think it’s a little cause you’re a girl. I don’t think your dad’s a-uh, the word for a guy who hates women?”“Misogynist.”“Yeah, that, thank you, I don’t think he’s that, but you know how people are. They believe that shit without knowing it. Shit, I had to train myself out of believing stuff like that. I don’t know how much of a conscious effort he’s put into it. With Barry…I don’t know, man. I don’t think it’s good that he disrespects you or makes you feel like this. That obviously ain’t good. Maybe he just saw your dad doing it and it transferred?”“I don’t understand much about people most of the time, but I know a thing or two about hurting people you love. He doesn’t love you any less, Iris, I can almost guarantee that, but he’s gotten used to these behaviors that he’s learned. The only way to get him to change is to make sure he knows that he’s hurt you. If he loves you, he’ll make an effort.”Iris looked at Len, who was looking at Mick. “Is it okay for me to stay here tonight? I just don’t think I can go back to the apartment yet.”Mick put his arm around her shoulders again, kissing her on the head.“You can stay here as long as you need, kid.”—“Hands up, everyone, this is a robbery!”“Anyone makes a move, I’ll roast you like pigs!”“…Mick?”Mick turned, gun dropping.“Oh. Hey, Iris.”Iris crossed her arms and gave Mick and Len a very pointed look. “Really? You guys just robbed a museum and a government building in the past month. WHY are you robbing a bank? Bank robberies aren’t even that profitable.”Mick grinned at her, sliding his goggles up to rest on his forehead. “Hey, you’ve been brushing up on your robbery facts. We should have a crime themed Jeopardy night.”“As long as Cisco doesn’t play. He gets so competitive.”Len crossed his arms over his chest and looked at the two of them. “Iris, as nice as it is to see you, we are in the middle of something.”Iris raised an eyebrow at him.“No you are not. Not anymore.“Mick snorted at Len’s surprised look. He stood there, hands at his side, jaw dropped. People rarely told Len what to do, especially in such a concrete way. Mick shook his head and turned to Iris. “Fine, Iris, we won’t rob this bank-”“Any bank, today. Wouldn’t it be better to lay low? If you need an adrenaline jump, go have sex in a movie theater or something.”Mick rolled his eyes. “We still on for brunch on the fourth?”“You know it. Now get.”Mick gave her a quick, one-armed hug and led a still-gaping Len out the door, laughing the whole way.
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
Laurel panted hard, dodging a punch and ducking, hand held straight out and striking her opponent’s side, hard enough to make him double over. “Fucking shit, Laurel, this is a sparring match, not a battle royale!”Laurel laughed, still a little breathless. Mick was still bent over, one hand pressed against his side. She patted his back a few times.“Consider it payback for that time you cracked my rib.”Mick tried to glare at her, but couldn’t keep the smile off his face.“Yeah, yeah, you’re never gonna let me live that down, are you?”Laurel handed him a water bottle and opened her own, downing half of it. “Nope.”Mick stood back up, leaning against the wall and drinking his own water. “I booked us our usual. We’re due over there in like, an hour, so we got time to shower before we go.”Laurel stretched her arms over her head before leaning down and touching her toes. “You going first?”Mick shook his head. “Nah, I’m good. Hell, I might just go hose down in the yard.”Laurel laughed and threw a towel at him, which he let fall to the floor before picking it up.—Mick groaned, laying his head back against the edge of the tub. “Fuck, I know we do this once a month but I always fucking forget how good it feels.”Laurel sighed happily, eyes closed, relaxing against the tub that she was in. “I know, it’s amazing. I’m so happy we switched from that other spa.”“That place used to be so nice. Shame the owner turned out to be a Nazi.”“Mhm. Shame about the building burning down, too.”“And the guy getting arrested.”Laurel and Mick both grinned, looking at each other. It was the third Saturday of the month, and that meant it was time for their monthly ‘Spar and Spa’ day. They’d spend a few hours exercising and sparring together before going to their favorite spa for their favorite treatments, and then lunch and spending the rest of the day shopping or watching television or generally fucking around and avoiding anything resembling a responsibility. Mick and Laurel had met years ago at an event for Central City’s LGBT+ population-Laurel had traveled to Central to avoid being seen in her own hometown-and Mick had become sort of a mentor to her during that time in her life, and had been a great help in figuring out her identity as a bigender and pansexual person.Mick being an openly nonbinary gay man had been inspiring to teenage Laurel. It was still inspiring to adult Laurel.“Ugh, I can’t stand this ‘soothing’ music they put on.”“I know, I know, I wonder if we could request-”“Metallica?”They said the band’s name in unison and laughed. “So what’re we doing after this?”“Hey, you know I don’t answer questions while I’m in the mud, Laurel.”“Oops, sorry. I forgot how much you adore your mud.”“Really? No ‘pig’ jokes? I set that up for you, man.”—“Listen, Sara, I’m sorry, but I’ve had this planned since last month. Me and my friend always do it, and I know he’d be really upset if I missed it. He said he needed to talk to me about something and it sounded important. I’m sorry. We have the whole rest of your vacation to hang out, though!”Sara frowned, and Laurel sighed. Her sister was never great at accepting when things didn’t go her way.“Alright, I guess. Do you know how long you’ll be gone?”“We work out for about two hours, and the spa takes about two and a half, and then we usually hang out for another four or five. It’s kind of a whole day thing.”“You’ve never even introduced me to this fried. Is he…you know…more than that?”Laurel thought of Mick and all the times he’d discussed in very vivid detail his love of his husband. Laurel burst out laughing.“No! No, never. He’s gay. And married, and even if he did like girls, he’s uh…not the cheating type.”Sara averted her eyes. Laurel frowned, grabbing her phone from where it went off. “Oh, looks like he’s here to pick me up.”“Let me walk you down.”Laurel shook her head. “No, it’s okay, you don’t have to-”“C’mon, Laurel, I promise to behave.”Laurel bit her lip, knowing that this was a bad idea, but also knowing that if she didn’t let Sara come with her, Sara would just follow her. They took the elevator down silently, exiting into the lobby, and Sara froze. “Sara? What’s wrong?”Sara had her eyes narrowed in Mick’s direction, and when Laurel looked back to her friend, she saw something she’d never seen on Mick’s face.Fear.“What the fuck are you doing with him?”Sara’s voice was an angry hiss, and Mick made no move to approach them, but Laurel could see his chest moving up and down rapidly, eyes darting from them to the various exits in the lobby. “He’s….he’s my friend, Sara.”“What-he never mentioned you-”“Yeah, cause we tend to keep it mostly to ourselves. We’re pretty private people, that’s how we like it. Hell, he doesn’t even ever pick me up, he’s just doing it now cause he had to drop his husband off somewhere.”“Do you know who he is?”Laurel rolled her eyes. “Yeah, the Duke of Westminster. He’s a criminal, I know. Hell, I’ve literally worked on cases that were prosecuting him.”“Then why the HELL are you friends with him?”Laurel looked at her sister; her face was twisted and flushed with rage. She’d never seen Sara so angry at something, and knew then for sure that Mick had been telling the truth. “Cause…I know him? I’ve known him since I was a teenager and he’s helped me-and others-more than I could ever repay him. He’s funny, and honest, and smart-”“Honest? Smart? Do you know what he did-”“On your little work trip? Yeah, I know. He told me everything. And I was really, really hoping he was exaggerating about you.”“What?”“He said you were awful towards him. That you insulted him and treated him like shit, and I cannot believe he was right. God, Sara, Dad raised you better than that.”“You believe him?!”Laurel stepped away from Sara, crossing her arms over her chest. “Yeah. I do. Mick has never once lied to me, or done anything to hurt me. When I was prosecuting against him, he told me to do what was right and forget that we were friends during the whole indictment, even though his husband said that he should use our friendship to get out of jail. He’s been nothing but an honest, caring, and good friend the entire time we’ve known each other, and I can honestly say he’s got a better track record with me than you do. So yes, Sara, I believe him.”Sara gaped at Laurel, tears in her eyes. She shook her head silently. Laurel stood a little straighter. “You should go, Sara.”With that, Laurel turned on her heel, walking towards Mick, who was still frozen in place and hyperventilating. Laurel placed her hand gently on his arm, wrapping her fingers around it so that the un-burned portion could feel it. “Hey, c’mon. It’s okay, let’s go.”Mick nodded, not looking at her-not looking at anything, actually, his eyes were vacantly staring into nothing-and Laurel led him out and to his truck. She fished the keys out of his pocket and gently pushed him into the passenger seat before going around to the driver’s side. Once she was in, she took a deep shaky breath, and looked at Mick. “Hey? Mick? It’s okay now, she’s inside. You’re not near her. I’m sorry that that happened, I tried to get her to stay up, but she insisted, and…I’m so sorry I put you in that position, Mick.”Mick swallowed and took a deep breath. “It’s okay.”“No, it’s not.”“Okay, it’s not, but it’s done. It wasn’t your fault.”Laurel reached out, gently running her hand over his shaved head. Mick visibly relaxed-she never did that, not unless he was in distress, and he clearly was now-and sighed. “We can skip today, if you want? Do you need to call Leonard?”Mick shook his head, wiping at his eyes with the back of his hand. “No, I’m good, I-I think maybe we should skip the sparring match, though, I don’t-I don’t feel comfortable being violent with you right now.”Laurel nodded, softly rubbing at the base of his skull. “Alright. So maybe just chill today? No workout or sparring, just the spa and maybe some movies back at the farm?”Mick nodded, sniffling and leaning his head back into the touch. “Thanks.”“You know it’s no problem, Mick.”—Laurel yawned and continued petting Mick’s head. He was laying on his side, head resting in her lap. She had been running her hand over his scalp for an hour now while they watched TV. “This show is nice.”Laurel smiled down at him. “Yeah, it is.”Adventure time was one of their less-watched shows, as most cartoons were, but when they were under high stress, they both tended to stay away from shows and movies with heavier themes. Cartoons were usually a nice balance of heavy and light, enough to keep them grounded but not enough to overload them. It was one of the nice, subtle things they had in common. As was their need to be physically comfortable while stressed-Mick had changed immediately when they’d gotten back to the farm, into some of his stress clothes; a comfortable, tight-fitting hoodie with patches of different-textured cloth sewn onto it and sleeves that went over his hands that he could pull on, loose shorts that stopped mid-thigh, and thick black tights that clung to his legs and covered his feet. Laurel had put on boxers and a tank top (her stress clothes were generally less specific than Mick’s), plopping herself on the couch, and waiting for Mick to decide how he wanted to go about being near her. Mick, in the context of friendship, loved women. He always had, stemming from his close relationship with his mother. He’d always found it easier to talk to women, and to this day had more female and feminine-leaning friends than he did men or masculine-leaning. Laurel remembered clearly that Mick gravitated towards the women and feminine people in the LGBT+ groups. Until The Incident. Mick had disclosed what happened to Laurel after months of not seeing each other, after he and Len had had a serious break-up, after he’d been in the fire. A woman had found him and done horrible, horrible things to him, and it had driven him away from his friends for a long time, and he was unable to stand being around women.But he’d texted Laurel one day, asking about the third Saturday of the month, and after many, MANY questions and a lot of crying, he’d explained it. Laurel had never been mad at him. She knew the sort of stigma male sexual assault victims went through, especially when their attacker is a woman. Laurel hadn’t even gotten mad when she found out about the revenge Len had gotten, law be damned. Mick made a quiet whine and Laurel realized she’d stopped moving her hand. “Laurel?”“Sorry, just….got lost in my own head there, for a minute.”Mick turned to lay on his back, looking up at her. “You okay?”“Yeah, just…I don’t know.”“Are you mad?”“Not at you. At myself, at her, yeah.”Mick frowned. “’m sorry for fucking things up between you two.”“Oh, Mick, trust me, things have been….me and Sara have always had a rocky relationship. She’s done a lot of things in the past that have hurt me, and I just. I don’t know. I never thought she would do something like that, though. You didn’t deserve that.”Mick shrugged.“I’m working on believing that.”Laurel poked his forehead, right between his eyes. “Good. That’s good. I’m happy you’re getting help.”“Yeah. Me too.”Mick yawned, and Laurel leaned back as they both got more comfortable. “Want me to play the next episode?”Mick tugged on his sleeves, humming happily at the pull of fabric. “Go right ahead.”
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
“DON’T!”A kick.“BE!”Another kick. “A FUCKING!”Two more kicks. “TRANSPHOBIC!”A stomp. “PIECE! OF! SHIT!”Mick kicked the guy a few more times before spitting down at him. Mick frowned, crossing his arms over his chest and walking away. He hated this. It always happened when he went out on a neutral or girl day dressed how he wanted. He wasn’t even in one of his more revealing or provocative outfits today; his normal boots, a black skirt that went just below his knees, a henley and a black jacket. He’d put a little makeup on, too, but not a lot. Mick wished fewer people were assholes. “Excuse me?”Mick turned at the voice, hands clenched into tight fists, ready to fight again.Mick’s eyes widened until it almost hurt.“Holy shit.”“I wanted to say that what you did was very honorable. It is so good to see someone stand up for what’s right.”“Holy shit.”“Are...are you alright?”Mick blinked and nodded his head slowly. “You’re-you’re Wonder Woman.”His voice sounded awestruck in his ears. Wonder Woman. The actual, real live, Wonder Woman was standing in front of him. She was speaking to him. She complimented him. She laughed-Mick felt a little faint, he made WONDER WOMAN laugh-and held her hand out. “Yes, I am Diana of Themyscira. It is nice to meet you.”Mick grabbed her hand, still staring wide-eyed.“I’m Mick. Mick Rory.”Diana smiled, dropping her firm grip on Mick’s hand (he shook Wonder Woman’s hand, oh God) and put her hands on her hips. Mick felt his heart in his throat. “Well, Mick Rory, would you like to go to lunch? I’ve never actually been to this city, and I’d like to see more of it with someone who knows where they’re going!”Mick nodded. Diana grinned. Mick almost wanted to cry. ---It was well known that Wonder Woman was the only hero that well and truly had the respect and admiration of almost every other hero, and most villains. She was ruthless in battle, but kind with citizens. A genius strategist who could be found playing soccer with kids in parks. Stronger physically than almost anyone else on the planet, and one of the strongest supporters of justice, truth, and freedom. Mick had always looked up to her, ever since she was revealed to the world. So had Len. So had Lisa. Mick had not, in fact, ever met someone who didn’t like or at least respect Diana. Mick couldn’t even really fathom someone not respecting her. ---Mick burst through the door, Len and Lisa looking up from where Lisa was painting Len’s nails. “You. Will not. Fucking believe. What just happened.”“Mick? Is everything okay?”“You were gone for way longer than you said you’d be.”Mick frowned at Lisa. “I know, Lise, I’m sorry, but holy shit, you guys are gonna understand. I met-and had lunch with and hung out with-Wonder Woman.”Both Snart siblings stared at Mick for a good minute and a half. “No fucking way.”“I got pictures.”Lisa jumped over the coffee table and fished Mick’s phone out of his pocket before he even knew what was happening. She started looking through his photos-thankfully not in the folder where he kept Len’s pictures-and squealed.“Lenny! He’s telling the truth, sweet Moses-she’s so beautiful!”Len got up and looked at the screen too. “Holy shit.”“I know!”“What did she say? What was she like?”“She was so awesome, guys, like. She saw me beat the shit out of someone who was being a dick about my outfit and she said it was honorable of me to do that. Wonder Woman said something I did was honorable. I told her about you guys and she wants to meet you.”Both siblings wrapped their arms around him in excitement. Mick hugged them back.---Mick twirled in the skirt, smiling at the way the fabric flew. “I think it looks lovely, Mick.”Mick turned and looked at Diana, smoothing her hands over the skirt. “You think? I don’t usually wear stuff like this.”Diana stood, walking up to Mick and setting her hands on her shoulders.“I don’t need the lasso to tell this truth, Mick.”Mick ducked her head down, blushing. Mick and Diana had hung out fairly often since they first met. Diana was one of the few people Mick felt comfortable with, enough that Mick was happy to let Diana shop with her.---Diana, to her surprise, greatly enjoyed Mick’s company. He was...interesting. A criminal, no doubt, but Diana could see that there was no evil in his heart. The good there was cracked and muddied and glowing bright with rage, but it was still there. As there was good in the rest of his little criminal family-whom she also enjoyed meeting. Lisa, in particular. A lovely young woman unsure of her place in womanhood because of circumstances of her birth. Diana had shut that train of thought down quick. Mick’s partner, Len, was also-for lack of a better term-a piece of work. Much like Lisa, the way he was born made him....unsure of himself, at times. Mick was, as well, whenever Mick had days where he wasn’t a ‘he’. It did make Diana smile to know that the world had become more open to the possibilities of gender. It still was......FAR from perfect, that had been made clear the first time she met Mick, but it was improving. People were improving. And it warmed her heart to see Mick, Len, and Lisa all flourish as they were meant to be. Diana still smiled as she threw their asses in jail on multiple occasions, but hey, what’re you gonna do? Criminals with cracked and muddied and furious good in their hearts were still criminals who had to be punished according to the law.(Though Diana had discovered she had some disagreements with many of the laws of man. She knew for a fact that Len and Lisa were often made to use their dead names by police, and that was inexcusable; even more inexcusable was the police’s prejudices towards the people of color in the world of man, something Len had had to deal with. Sometimes Diana wondered if Themyscira should intervene.)Mick had proven himself a good friend and a good-well, person, as ‘man’ wasn’t entirely applicable to him. Diana had first seen him, them, more appropriately, in a fight with someone who’d said something derogatory about Mick’s choice of attire. It had been then that she’d seen the first glimpse of that cracked, muddied, fury-bright good in his heart. Diana sometimes wished Mick and his family would stop the criminal activity, but she knew that that was the only way they could live. It took time to make peace with it-easier once they all agreed to some rules-but make peace she did, and they were all happier for it.---Mick’s breath came heavily and quickly. He tried to calm himself, to slow his breathing and heart rate, but he couldn’t. It felt like there was heavy smoke closing in around him-he hated smoke, he hated it-and he leaned back against the nearest wall. He hated this. This was supposed to be a party. A celebration. But he didn’t belong here. He wanted to go home, he wanted the farm, he wanted his safe clothes and the necklaces he could chew on and the toys that he could pull on and stretch and he wanted-He wanted Len.His team didn’t come near him, and he didn’t blame them. Why would they? They didn’t care. Well, Mick suspected Amaya cared a little bit, and he didn’t mind her-she tried at least a little and reminded him a little bit of Kendra (not a thought Mick wanted to have, another person he loved and never got to see), but she liked the rest of the team more and fell in with their actions. Mick wasn’t mad at her for that, though. He understood, and just hoped she wouldn’t get as bad as they had. Mick was shaking, wanting to look up and find an exit but unable to. They’d be staring at him, he knew it, he knew they would be, because he was having an episode and people always stared when he had episodes because it just proved everything they thought of him, he hated having them in public, he hated it-“Hey.”Mick took a deep, ragged breath, focusing on the shoes in his line of sight. A pair of boots. Oliver’s. Oliver was talking to him. Mick slowly looked up, at Oliver. He glanced around.“No one’s watching, Mick, trust me. Take some deep breaths. I promise no one is gonna bother you right now. I need you to tell me what’s up when you’re ready.”Mick squeezed his hands with his breathing until it slowed and he was calmer. “I don’t wanna be here. I hate it here and it hurts and I just want to go home.”Oliver was quiet for a moment, arms crossed in front of his chest. “You mean the party, or the team?”Mick bit back a sob. “The team.”Oliver nodded. “C’mon. I need to know what’s going on. Do you want anyone else to hear this?”Mick looked around at the other people milling about the party. “Barry and Kara.”Oliver nodded again.“Go outside, sit against the wall and think of five things you can see and four things you can physically feel. We’ll be there in a moment.”Mick followed the instruction and went outside, waiting a few moments until Oliver came out with Barry and Kara in tow. Barry looked concerned, and Kara stood next to Mick, rubbing his arm gently. “Hey, what’s going on?”Barry nervously bit his lip. “Is this about Snart?”Mick sobbed again, letting himself lean on Kara, who easily supported him. Oliver waited until Mick pulled away to speak again. “Is there anyone not here presently that you want here?”Mick shoved his hands in his pockets and kicked at the ground. “One person, yeah. Can I borrow your phone? Mine got busted up.”Barry offered his cell up, taking Mick’s and promising to get it fixed. Mick dialed the familiar number, holding the phone up to his ear until it was answered. “Hey, Diana. Uh. Where are you? Yeah? Could you drop by this party I’m at? Yeah, it’s the-yeah. Okay. Cool. See you in a minute.”Mick handed Barry’s phone back and took a deep breath. They waited, Kara softly rubbing Mick’s arms and shoulders, at one point briefly trailing her fingers over the base of Mick’s skull, making him relax. Barry and Oliver talked quietly, all of them waiting. Ten minutes later, they all looked up as Diana flew towards them, gently landing on the ground. She smiled at them at first, happy to see some of her friends in the superhero world, but the smile faded quickly at the sight of Mick. She approached him carefully, and Kara stepped away. Mick threw his arms around Diana and held her tight, burying his face against her long hair. “Mick, what has happened?”Mick pulled away, looking between his friend and the other three heroes. He took a deep breath.“I can’t be on that team anymore.”“Team?”“I’ve been working with a group for the past year or so. We’ve been traveling through time and preventing stuff. But-I lost-he-”Diana gasped and brought her hand to her mouth. “Oh, no.”“’m sorry I never called or anything, I haven’t-I ain’t been well, I’ve been-drinking, a lot. And-I started hurting myself again, and I keep putting myself in places where I know I’ll probably die.”Barry, Oliver, and Kara all looked solemn and horrified, while Diana’s face slowly became more and more enraged. “But-it wouldn’t have been as bad, cause I’ve had times like this before, but...it’s the team.”“What do you mean?”“They talk about me. They call me stupid, and a bunch of other things, and they-Sara said she wanted to kill me at one point and Stein’s always really on my ass about how stupid I am in comparison to him-”“Whoa, whoa, wait, you’re not stupid, Mick, they should know that. Why would they-”Mick looked up at Barry. “Because they can. I’m an easy target, kid. I just lost-I lost someone, I’m fucked up, I’m not a good guy, and...I guess it’s just easier for them. They’ve never really cared about me but I thought after-I thought they’d at least ask if I was okay, but they didn’t. I lost Len’s cold gun because of it. I-I know I’m not a genius or a hero or any shit like that but being around these people makes me wanna fucking die, and sometimes I think it would just be better if I just did it, cause then they wouldn’t have to deal with me and I could be with-”Mick closed his eyes, tears falling down his cheeks. When he opened them again, Barry looked sick, Oliver and Kara looked like they were just barely holding back their anger, but Diana-Diana was furious. “Show me to these people.”“Don’t, please, Diana, they don’t-”“Show me. To them.”Oliver stepped up. “You’re not killing anyone, Diana.”“I know that. But I am not going to stand by and allow this. And neither should any of you.”Barry rubbed his hand over his face. “She’s right. We have to go talk to them.”“Please, don’t do that, I’m gonna have to go back and-”“No. No you won’t.”Mick looked at Oliver, brows furrowed. “Mick, you did good work throughout this entire invasion. I saw that you did good work. I’ve read your files. You’re a competent and loyal, hard-working team member who’s extremely valuable on the field. Your brain is perfect for heat-of-the-moment strategy. And I think you belong on a team, or with a partner. I think you can still do good. But you are not going back on a team that you just finished telling us verbally and emotionally abuses you to the point that you’re suicidal. You’re free to do whatever you want, but for your own safety, I am not letting you leave this current time.”Kara put her hand back on Mick’s shoulder. “We want to help you.”Diana gently grasped Mick’s chin, directing him to look her in the eye. “I will not fight your battles for you, Mick. From the moment we’ve met, you have been fighting your own fights. But you have to see that you need help. Please, as your friend-”Diana reached down and wrapped her hand around his. “Let me help you.”Mick nodded. Diana turned and threw the door open-off its hinges-and Barry sighed. “Oh boy.”They all followed her into the warehouse, the party halting as everyone turned to stare at her. Wonder Woman, in her fully costumed glory, hands on her hips and furious. The light glinted off the metal on her wrists. “Which of you are the ones who have been working on a team with Mick Rory?”Sara, Ray, Stein, Jax, Amaya, and Nate all stepped up. Diana practically growled at them. “So you are the people who have hurt my friend?”“What?” “We didn’t do anything to him!”Sara and Stein protested, but Diana quickly and smoothly tossed her lasso around them both. “The lasso compels you: what is your truth? Why have you treated him this way?”“I don’t trust him. He’s a criminal, and it’s easier to ignore any help he’s given us so that I feel right and smarter.”Sara blinked and spoke once Stein finished. “Because he deserves it.”Diana pulled the lasso off of them and stared at Sara, horrified. “How could you say that? I expect more of a fellow warrior, a fellow woman-yet...you do this to one of the most vulnerable of your team?”“Vulnerable? Look at him, he’s like a damn tank!”Mick backed away, trying to distance himself from....everything that was happening. Diana turned her stare on Nate. “He is more than you think. I will not disclose how; it is not my place, but I can guarantee you that it is true.”“So what, his feelings are hurt? He can get over it. My feelings were hurt when my sister-”“Don’t talk about Laurel.”Sara stared at Oliver. “You think this is just about feelings getting hurt? I’ve seen videos from the ship. I’ve seen how you all treated him. I get it, he’s a criminal, but he’s a human, and you all have spent the last year targeting him and treating him like dirt when he’s been grieving and in a depressive state. You demean him when he is at his most vulnerable. So yeah, his feelings are probably hurt. But it’s more than that.”Amaya took a few steps towards Mick, only for Diana to block her. Amaya stared into her eyes for a second before looking around her at Mick. “Mick? I’m sorry if....if I was a part of this. If I made this worse, or contributed to it. I-I never meant for that. I’m sorry.”Mick briefly made eye contact with her and nodded. Diana placed her hand on Amaya’s shoulder. “Thank you. You have my respect, sister.”Amaya nodded and stepped away. Jax moved forward, and Stein reached out and grabbed his arm to stop him. Jax looked back at him and jerked his arm away. “Don’t stop me, Grey. You know what Clarissa would say if she knew.”That statement made Stein gasp and stagger backward. “Mick, man...I know I’ve been a part of this. And I can’t even blame it on Grey’s influence. I acted horribly towards you sometimes and that...it just wasn’t right. It wasn’t. I’m sorry. I hope you can forgive me someday. I never should have done what everyone else was doing.”Mick rubbed nervously at his arm. Diana clapped Jax on the shoulder like she had done with Amaya. Diana looked at the rest of the team, waiting for someone, anyone else to apologize as well. She narrowed her eyes when no one did. “I cannot make you feel remorse for what you’ve done. I cannot make you apologize and make amends. I cannot force you, and I wouldn’t if I could. But know this: what you did was wrong. You have hurt someone out of malice, out of jealousy, out of pressure. Understand that heroes are not measured by the great deeds that they do, but by how they treat the people around them, especially the most vulnerable. And you have proven that you are not heroes. And sadly-” Diana directed her glare to Sara.“Some of you never will be.”Diana turned on her heel, walking up to Mick and putting her hands on his shoulders. “I would like to take you to Themyscira. You will have the time and the tools you need to heal.”She looked over at Oliver, Barry, and Kara. “Make sure his things are retrieved from that ship and taken to his home.”Oliver nodded before turning to face the group. Mick didn’t hear what was said as Diana led him away, out of the building, and into the night. ---“Now take a deep breath-”Mick inhaled deeply, eyes closed. He listened to Epione’s gentle, deep voice and let it soothe him. Her. Them. Mick had been in a constant state of fluidity since beginning his stay at Themyscira. It felt safe to do so. He hadn’t felt safe enough to properly express himself since Len was alive. But on Themyscira, with the Amazons, it was encouraged. Mick exhaled, following Epione’s instruction.“How are you feeling, Mick?”Mick opened his eyes and smiled at the healer. “Better, since we started this. Still can’t stop thinking about....everything, but it’s easier, a little.”“You’re not supposed to not think about it. You’re just supposed to be able to handle thinking about it.”Mick turned at the sound of Diana’s voice, grinning and standing up to greet his friend. Diana pulled Mick into a hug, squeezing him tight. “How are you feeling?”“Alright. Still...still fucked up, but not as bad.”Diana pulled away, hands resting on Mick’s shoulders. “I’m happy to hear that. Walk with me?”“Alright.”Mick walked alongside Diana along the path away from the small hill where Epione brought him for healing sessions. “So you’re doing better?”“Yeah.”“Good. Then I believe now is a good time to tell you.”Mick stopped. “Tell me what?”Diana smiled at him-easily, slowly, she knew their mind immediately went to the worst place-and reached to grab his forearm, gently. “Don’t worry, Mick. It’s nothing bad. It is, in fact, spectacularly good.”Mick bit his lip, but began walking alongside her again. They came to a temple, bright with natural sunlight pouring in through the columns. Mick knew this place as a sort of terminal to the underworld-he’d been told early in his stay here what each place was.Diana led him deeper into the temple, until the sunlight faded, the tunnels lit by torches, firelight gleaming off of the thin streaks of bright, shiny minerals in the walls. “Diana?”“Yes?”“Are we in the underworld right now?”“Yes.”“Huh.”Mick looked at the space around him. It was surprisingly warm, and cozy. Not at all scary, like one might expect. As they traveled deeper, they began passing by the souls of the dead. They looked-for the most part-content. Some hung around in small meadows, under trees-Diana explained that as it was winter in the world of man, it was time for the underworld to bloom, given that its queen had returned, bringing life with her.They finally stopped at the foot of a large palace-not a fancy one, by any means, it was all dark stone, and few decorations. Mick could appreciate that. He looked forward as he heard a growl-three growls, actually.Mick’s eyes brightened at the sight of the three-headed dog, and he pulled out of Diana’s grasp to approach it slowly. “Hey, look at you, what a cute puppy! Three puppies? I don’t know, but look how precious you are! Are you a good boys? Yes you are!”The dog stopped growling and sat, tail wagging happily. One head sniffed at Mick’s hand, another happily yipped, and the third licked at his other hand. Mick kneeled in front of the dog and began petting it. “I swear, that dog ain’t much of a guard dog.”Mick looked up, blinking. A man stood on the steps, clothed in black, surprisingly modern clothes. He had short, curly hair, a strong brow, a strong jaw-a very intense face overall. He didn’t look as though he smiled much. His nose was adorably flat. He’d probably broken it a lot.“Diana.”“Hades.”“This the guy you were talking about?”“Yes. Mick, this is Hades, king of the underworld.”“Nice to meet you. What’s the dog’s name?”The corner of Hades’ mouth twitched up. Close to a smile, at least.“Cerberus, officially, but we all call him Max.”Mick patted each of Max’s heads before returning to Diana’s side. Hades gestured for them to follow, and they did, Max trotting along at Hades’ side. They came to a small room that opened to the back, a clear view of the river behind in. Mick stopped in the doorway at the sight of-it couldn’t be him. There was no way.“Mick, it is him.”Must’ve said that out loud. “How-”“Lucky for you, I owed Di here a favor. She asked for him to be resurrected.”Mick approached the bed slowly-more of a slab of rock with a few cushions on it-and kneeled. “Len?”Len stirred, but didn’t open his eyes. Mick reached up and grabbed his hand, holding it, tracing the lines and scars gently.“He should be awake soon. Bringing someone back like this takes a while.”Mick looked up to see a beautiful woman standing in front of him; clothed in dark, deep red robes, wildly curly hair falling to her shoulders, pale skin almost glowing. She was looking at Mick with unseeing eyes, her gaze in his direction but never quite landing on him.“Thank you.”She smiled, going to stand next to Hades; he wrapped an arm around her to pull her close, and she pressed against him. Mick felt Diana’s hand land on his shoulder, and he looked up at her. “Do you want me to stay until he wakes?”Mick nodded. Diana stood behind him, hand steadily on her shoulder, and Hades and Persephone took seats outside, facing the river. “You didn’t have to do this, you know. A favor from Hades, being able to bring anyone back...you coulda done something else.”“I know. I could have. But I didn’t. I wanted to do this, for you. For my friend.”Mick reached up with his other hand, setting it on top of Diana’s. He leaned down, resting his forehead on the cold stone.“Careful now, I just got back. hate to think anyone’s trying to steal my husband away.”Mick’s head shot up at the scratchy, low drawl. Len’s eyes were open, barely, and he weakly smiled at Mick. Mick choked on his name when he spoke it, reaching up and gently cupping Len’s cheek, afraid that his hand would pass through him, like smoke.“Mick, what-” Len interrupted himself with a cough- “what happened?”“Shh, Len, don’t go talking too much now.”Mick looked up at the sound of Hades and Persephone’s footsteps coming back into the room. Persephone tilted her head a bit and smiled before kneeling next to the slab. “Well, I see you’re back. That’s good. It took quite a bit of effort to wrestle you back to the living.”“The living?”Diana kneeled next to the slab and rested her hand on Len’s shoulder.“You died. I asked Hades to pay back a favor.”Len’s eyes widened and he swallowed back against tears.“I-Diana, I-”“Please, rest. Your body and soul need it.”Len looked at Mick, and Mick leaned down to kiss him softly. Len smiled against his lips and rested back, letting his eyes drift shut. Soon his breathing-God, he was breathing again-evened out. Mick leaned back, sitting on the floor.“Hades, love, let’s go back outside. We need to check on our tree.”“Hm? Oh, yeah, alright babe. We’ll be back later.”Diana nodded at Hades and sat cross-legged next to Mick. He looked....almost like he was in shock.“Mick? Are you going to be alright?”“He’s alive.”“Soon, yes. He’s not quite there, but-” Diana smiled, “-when have you ever known Len to half-ass something?”Mick turned his head to look at her, breaking into a smile. He laughed quietly and looked at his husband, laying on the table.“Diana, I-I don’t know if I’ve ever told you this, but-all the things I’ve done, all the crimes, I’m a bad guy. Even being semi-retired, maybe retired for good now, I ain’t ever gonna be a good guy. I’m okay with that. I know who I am. But you, Diana-man, you’re really something else.”Mick smiled to himself, before turning to look at Diana again.“You’re a real wonder.”Diana laughed, and gently nudged him. He grinned, for a moment, before the expression fell.“I gotta ask, though, I-with who I am, and who you are, I don’t...why do you hang around me? Why do-what the hell do you see in me?”Diana thought for a moment.“I don’t consider it a waste, if that’s what you’re thinking. I...I know that you are a criminal. But you’ve never really wanted to hurt people. You’ve wanted to steal and fight, but actively, maliciously hurt others? Hurt innocents? You try to avoid it. I will never condone your criminal activity. I will admire that you still look out for the most vulnerable people around you. You and Len have even spent your money unselfishly.”Diana did not experience the same feelings about money that Mick and Len did; they were terrified of having nothing, of living in poverty like they had as children and into their early adulthood. They loved having money, but they rarely spent it on anything that wasn’t necessities; the idea of fickle spending frightened them. It had been interesting to discover the nuances of their motivation.“You bought out an entire neighborhood so that the people could stay and that developers couldn’t gentrify it and drive them out of their homes. I’ve seen how much you both do for charity. I’ve seen you control other criminals in your city so that they don’t kill. Mick, you volunteer at three queer youth groups. You personally paid for a young girl’s transition. Len has done the same. I once said a hero is not defined by their great acts, but by how they treat the people around them, the most vulnerable people. And while what you have done, what you believe of the world and yourself, what you want to be, may keep you from being a hero, Mick....you are also a real wonder.”Mick stared at Diana for a moment, eyes wide and unbelieving. Diana gently wrapped her arm around his shoulders, sitting side by side with her friend as they waited for Len to wake up.---Diana sighed and grinned, leaning back in the chair. There was a soft, warm breeze, and she and Mick both had a glass of iced tea. It was one of the many foods she had found she enjoyed. Mick had also, at the state fair, introduced her to the concept of deep-fried ice cream. Diana had thought ice cream could not be improved upon. She was mistaken. The person who thought to fry it should be given a medal. Diana intended on bringing it up with the president. It was important that they be given a medal. They were sitting on the back porch of the house at the farm, watching Len and Lisa tend to the baby pigs that had been born recently.“How’re you doing, Diana?”“I’m...well.”Mick gave her a look.“Come on now. Don’t do that. You don’t have to tell me what’s wrong, but don’t lie to me, please?”Diana frowned and thought back to the day before. Her meeting with some of the other heroes had gone....terribly. They were all angry and frustrated and the Black Canary and Green Arrow seemed to be letting their past personal tensions affect their ability to work together, and Supergirl seemed particularly upset lately. Diana would have to speak with her soon to see if she could help.She had gone to the farm immediately afterward. It was an all-around safe space, and she knew many other heroes utilized it. Diana knew for certain that a certain bat-themed hero of Gotham had been recently and paid for Mick and Len’s barn upgrades as thanks. Diana had spent most of the night in the stables with the horses. It reminded her of home.“I think...I would like to tell you later. Not now, not until I’ve figured things out.”“Cool. You want more tea?”“Yes, thank you.” She followed Mick into the house, petting the cat that laid sleeping on the counter in the sunlight as she did. There were so many animals here, and so much natural space. Even the house was filled with plants. Mick poured her a glass of tea, and handed it to her. He leaned against the counter and crossed his arms. “Hey, uh...are you free on Saturday?”“I believe so, yes. Unless an emergency comes up.”“Cool. I-would you mind coming with me to this thing? It’s for one of the youth groups, I....kinda slipped up and they saw a picture I had of you and me.”Diana laughed, a full laugh. “I hope it wasn’t one of the embarrassing ones.”“Nah, thankfully I had good luck for once in my life. It was one of the ones from Bruce’s birthday party last year.”Diana lifted a hand to her chin, and thought for a moment, a serious look on her face. “Hm. I remember all of those being embarrassing.”“Hey, no, the ones with Bruce in them were embarrassing, I was perfectly well behaved. Batty boy was the one trying to moon people. Why would he do that in a skyscraper? No one could even see him!”“I think it was more symbolic. You know how he gets when Kara brings that alien alcohol.”Mick shook his head and laughed. “Man, I’m happy he’s cut down. He’s coming down in a couple of weeks.”“Oh, yes, for Yom Kippur?”“Yup. Bringing all the kids, too. You can come along, if you want. Clark and Kara are coming, and Kara’s bringing Lena, I think.”“Haven’t she and Len been meaning to meet?”Mick playfully and overdramatically sighed. “Don’t remind me. A Luthor and a Snart in the same room? God, we’re gonna all need earplugs.”Diana and Mick continued to talk and laugh, until Len called them outside to come see the piglets.
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
Mick walked quietly and slowly. He knew he could take his time reaching his destination. The wooded area was quiet now, and a balmy breeze blew past him, gentle, as late spring was. He could hear the first insects and critters of the season chittering and chattering around, and he enjoyed the sounds. He heard a faint buzzing, and knew he was close. Soon he came to a small clearing, where a fire was steadily going. On the other side of the fire sat a young woman. Her skin was dark, the firelight glinting off of the red stone in her forehead. She was floating about a foot off the ground, and didn’t open her eyes at his arrival. Mick didn’t say anything, instead sitting down across from her. He looked into the fire, letting his mind quiet. It never did, not fully, but Raven had told him that was fine. Mick’s breathing steadied, and he lost himself in the fire, and the low buzzing noise emanating from Raven’s energy.They sat there, meditating, for a long while. Mick didn’t pay mind to the time. Len knew where he was, since this had been a weekly occurrence since he’d met the young woman. He enjoyed the meditation. Not that this was the only thing he did with Raven; sometimes they hung out at the farm, or in the city. They’d gone to a few concerts together, even.Mick enjoyed the meditation nights the most, though. He felt lighter after them. The buzzing slowly faded, as Raven floated to sit on the ground. The movement brought Mick out of his mind, and he grinned at the girl. “Hey kid.”“Hello.”“How you doing?”“Fine.”Mick rolled his shoulders and let his body relax, leaning back against a log they’d dragged over their before. “He’s being a jerk again.”Mick popped various joints. “Yeah?”“Yes. He...isn’t shutting up.”Mick frowned, and looked across the fire at Raven. She had her knees pulled up to her chest, the hood of her jacket pulled tight over her head. “Shit, kid. That’s shit.”“Yeah.”Mick reached into the bag he brought with him, pulling out a skewer and a bag of marshmallows. He tossed them to Raven, and pulled out a bar of chocolate for himself. “Thank you.”Mick grunted and sat, eating and watching the fire. They talked a little more through the night, until Raven stood and stretched. Mick put out the fire, thoroughly, checking it twice before he was satisfied. He faced Raven, and waited for her to decide how to say goodbye. She hugged him, after a long moment, and he hugged back. “I’ll see you later, kid.”“See you, Mick.”Mick watched as she opened up a portal, waving goodbye to him again before the portal shut. He gathered up his things, and started the walk back. The air was warm and damp as he breathed it in, looking up at the treetops, smiling at the glint of starlight between branches. He thought to himself, as he walked, that he felt lighter. Just like always.
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10602528
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Not Quite Rose
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{
"Archive Warning": "No Archive Warnings Apply",
"Category": "F/M",
"Characters": "Rose Tyler | Bad Wolf, Rose Tyler, The Doctor (Doctor Who), The Doctor's TARDIS, Bad Wolf (Doctor Who), Jack Harkness | Face of Boe, River Song, Mickey Smith, Jackie Tyler, Pete Tyler, Pete Tyler (Pete's World)",
"Fandom": null,
"Language": "English",
"Rating": "General Audiences",
"author": "by Yukifall",
"chapters": "2/?",
"completed": "",
"published": "2017-04-12T00:00:00",
"words": "10,008",
"Additional Tags": "BadWolf!Rose, Basically \"put that thing back where it came from or so help me\", this is just the beginning, The Doctor's an Idiot, they're so in love, Foreknowledge!Rose, Fix-It",
"Relationship": null,
"Character": null,
"Relationships": "Ninth Doctor/Rose Tyler, Ninth Doctor & Jack Harkness & Rose Tyler, The Doctor/Bad Wolf",
"Series": null,
"Collections": null,
"Fandoms": "Doctor Who, Doctor Who (2005)",
"Archive Warnings": null,
"Categories": null,
"Bookmarks": null,
"Chapters": null,
"Comments": null,
"Completed": null,
"Hits": null,
"Kudos": null,
"Published": null,
"Words": null,
"Updated": null
}
|
“Run.” She should have been more surprised. But honestly? She couldn’t get past that because holy crap there’s no way he's real. His slightly colder hand grabbed hers and pulled her away as the window dummy brought it’s arm down. The next few minutes passed in a haze as they ran. Boy, could they run. She jumped as he pulled the plastic arm through the doors of the elevator so that they would close in the nonexistent faces of the dummies. Looking to her left as the Doctor pulled out his sonic screwdriver, She had to cover her mouth to not scream or blurt out everything that was running through her mind. He then tossed the arm over to her and she grabbed it without really having to look at it.'Holy shit, that’s the Doctor… where is-' The thought cut off as memories that weren’t quite her own but from her perspective came racing into the fore ground of her mind. They were Rose’s memories and literally her entire life flashed through her head. Having two sets of memories was weird but She didn’t really get time to dwell on it because the elevator doors finally opened. She realized it hadn’t said anything but there was a strange whining sound coming from the elevator. Judging by the way the Doctor looked at her, it was coming from her. She took a shuttering breath and calmed herself down. He needed Rose to ask questions and damn it, he was going to get Rose.“Sorry. Nearly dying wasn’t on my list of things to do today but I’m over it now. What’s happening with the dummies and who are you?” She asked, her voice slipping into Roses accent as the elevator doors opened. The Doctor was still giving the blonde (because as she could now see the bangs hanging her face were a bright blonde rather than the dull brown it used to be) a weird look but began to explain The Autons. Honestly, She’s seen the episode plenty of times to know what he was going to do. As he pulled her out the door, She quickly turned back, looking at him with a raised eyebrow.“And where are you goin?” She asked as he continued to fiddle with the bomb in his hands.“There’s a signal on the roof and I’m going to disrupt it. Might die in the process but don’t you worry about me. Go on home and have your beans on toast and watch the telly, or whatever it is you do these days. Don’t tell anyone about this or you’ll get them killed.” He then ran through the door and shut it behind him before opening it again half way.“I’m the Doctor by the way. What’s your name?”
‘Neatly fifteen minutes of running and finally he asks.’
“Rose.” The name spilled out of her mouth before she had a chance to think about it.“Well then Rose, run for your life!” He said giddily shaking the bomb in his hand before closing the door again. The girl let out an exacerbated giggle while shaking her head as she tried to wrap her head around it. Absentmindedly looking over the plastic arm, she realized she probably should be running for her life. She quickly turned on her heel and sprinted away from the shop. She reached other side of the road and turned around just in time to watch as Hendricks blew up.Then she cracked.The girl started to laugh. Manically. As pieces of the shop scattered around her, she doubled over in laughter. She couldn’t think. The madness of it all was over whelming her brain. It stopped finally when a loud humming interrupted her scattered thoughts, quickly soothing and calming the blonde down. When she finally had the strength to stand up straight, she looked around and saw that gorgeous ship. The humming in her mind gave off an appreciative tone and she started to giggle again. The TARDIS shut it down, the humming drowning out the thoughts so that she could calm down again.' I don’t know what you did… But bless you. BLESS YOU TARDIS.' The confused girl thought towards the sentient ship before dashing towards where Rose’s memories were leading her. Home. The Powell Estates. She raced up the stairs and quickly opened the door to find Jackie on the phone, her voice carrying throughout the tiny apartment.“Rose! There she is! It’s everywhere! Everyone’s phoning in trying to see if you’re all right!” Jackie said her hand barely covering the receiver of the phone as she talked to her. She quickly raced into the kitchen to start tea. Mickey appeared somewhere in that time and honestly, she needed to talk with him. She pulled him up off the couch and took him to the door.As they stood outside, sirens in the distance still blaring, the blonde sighed. Rose had a lot of affection for Mickey and neither of the two-consciousness’s wanted him to suffer.“Mickey… I don’t know if I can do this anymore.” She said not looking at him. He fidgeted and looked at her with a questioning look.“Is this about the betting? I swear Rose I’ll st-” Her snort of laughter interrupted him and he quickly shut up.“Oh Mickey… No. I’m sorry. It’s just… I nearly died today. It really makes you rethink life and honestly I don’t want to be tied down. I’ve been thinking about traveling and now that I don’t have a job, it’s probably gonna be the best chance I get to do it. I don’t want you to worry about me.” The girl said looking at him as he digested the information.“But we’ve been good, yeah?” He asked swallowing the lump in this throat.“The best.” She assured him, “But I’m nineteen… I think its time I took my year… Who knows? Maybe I’ll come back and get my A-levels in Astrophysics or somethin’.” The blonde said giving the classic Rose Tyler tongue in teeth smile. Mickey laughed at that and nodded before jumping up.“Well Rose… Don’t forget to phone when you’re gone… I’ll be waiting for you when you get back.” He said tears building in his eyes.“Oh Mickey… If you find someone please go after her… Don’t wait up on me.” He smiled sadly and shook his head.“Maybe later but…” He sighed, shaking his head, before turning and walking away.She sighed as well but didn’t dwell on it any longer. He was going to be fantastic. Mickey Smith, Defender of Earth always had a nice ring to it and he most certainly was going to live up to that name. She walked back inside silently humming to herself as thoughts raced through her head.“What’s this then?” Jackie asked holding up the plastic arm. The blonde flinched lightly realizing that it needed to be tossed out to continue the story.“Oh it’s just something I picked up before the shop went up… Not much use now. can you toss it for me? I’m exhausted and I think I’m just gonna head to bed.” Jackie looked at it and shrugged before heading out the door to toss it. She said her thanks before heading into Rose’s… her? the bedroom and good god was it pink. The Rose side of their mind rebuffed the thought thinking it was great. The other side huffed a little before flinging herself across the bed.The day’s events then began to catch up to her. First of how the heck did she find herself in this situation. She knew that her name was not Rose Tyler.
'Yes, it is.'
'No it’s not.'
'If that’s not our name, then what is?'
The voice in her head had a point there. She knew she had another name but as she continued to think about it the more she couldn’t remember. The few things she could remember were that she used to be American. Doctor Who was a television show that she had watched religiously.'I'm going to call it right now… Bad Wolf had something to do with this. Surprisingly… I not that upset. There are lives to be saved and maybe I can change a few things to. Possibly will need to be left on that beach… but only once. I won’t be left with someone who will burn and honestly if the Doctor couldn’t tell that that was what was going to happen then he’s more of an idiot then I thought.' She could feel the Rose side hum in agreement. These things might not have happened to her yet but she was able to go through the new memories just like she was able to with the old.“We need to stop calling ourselves different things. It’s not Rose and Not Quite Rose. We’re the same person now. We are Rose but a bit more. And if the Doctor is going to take us with him then we have to act like it. You covered well with your slip up in the elevator but now we need to have everything under control for next time. We should probably start a journal to keep track of what’s going on and what’s going to happen so that we’re not surprised. I doubt that the Old Girl would object to hiding it from the Doctor. I know there will be times where we don’t know what’s going on but then again we can’t know everything. At least, not yet.” Rose grinned to herself at that.“Rose! Someone left something at the door for you!” Jackie call opening the door to her room. In her hands was a book sized package covered in a very telling shade of blue wrapping paper. Thoughts racing, Rose jumped up and grabbed the package, tearing the paper off to reveal a journal. One that couldn’t possibly exist yet but then again, this is the impossibility of the Doctor here.“Who left this? What did they look like?” The blonde asked quickly. 'Oh dear God, if things change the way I want them to then what am I going to do about Ri-'“It was a lady. Very curly hair and different clothing. You’d think she’d have stepped out of one of those old detective movies.” Jackie said shrugging before turning and leaving Rose to her thoughts.“Oh no.. Oh no no no no no.” Rose thought holding the journal as she opened it to the first page.
Hello Sweetie,
Goodness, isn’t it nice to have the drop on you for once. I know you’re freaking out right now with worry but don’t. Calm down and take a breath. Honestly, you get so flustered when I do this.
No Spoilers though, right?
I always knew something was off with you but when you told me, I almost couldn’t believe it. But then again, Bad Wolf has always been an enigma to me. Just so you know… You and I are going to be the very best of friends. You told me so; the first time we met. And it’s been true no matter what happened. Don’t lose your spark. The Doctor will need it in times to come. Trust in me and trust in yourself when I say You’re going to have a Fantastic life.
Trust me, Sweetie.
Professor River Song
Rose stood frozen for a solid five minutes, memorizing the letter to a T, before closing the journal and sighing. She lightly stroked the cover of it, the panels feeling as comforting as a warm blanket on a rainy day.“Let’s get down to business. If we…If I want that future with River, then I need a plan.” Rose thought finally coming to terms with what they had been given. This was her chance. A chance to change things for the better. Rose Tyler woke groggily the next morning to her alarm going off and groaned. She shoved her face into the pillows wanting to go back to sleep. With her new memories, Rose had spent most of that night scribbling things down to remember the order of what happened. Regenerations, things she knew were fixed points that she couldn’t change, things she would try to fix and get a second opinion on from the TARDIS, and things that she would fix. There were so many things that were going to happen and now that she was in for the long run (The long run being as far as meeting River but then again time was in flux) Rose wasn’t about to mess up.The blonde was up making some tea when the tale-tell rattle of the cat flap rang through the apartment. She yelled at her mum (because she couldn’t continue to call her Jackie when she was in fact her mum.) about nailing the thing down as the blonde remembered what happened next. Rose swore she hadn't jumped when the flap rattled again and she had to stop herself from smiling when the Doctor’s face appeared on the other side. Rose opened the door quickly and before she could get a word out the Doctor began to mutter to himself.“What are you doing here?” He asked looking at her with the same expression as last night.“I live here.”“Well what do you do that for?”“Because I do? I’m only here cos’ someone blew up my job.” Rose growled, although she wasn’t really that mad.“Must have gotten the wrong signal… You’re not plastic are you?” He reached his hand up to knock on her skull before she had a chance to react, “Nope Bonehead. Alrighty then I’ll be-”“You. Inside. Now.” The girl said grabbing hold of his leather jacket and pulling him inside.“Who is it?” Jackie called from her room on the right.“He’s here about last night.” Rose said pulling him forward.“She deserves compensation!” Jackie yelled as they passed.“Millions.” The Doctor agreed. Rose didn’t let their conversation get past that because Mum had no self-restraint and the Doctor was oblivious.“Don’t mind the mess. Do you want coffee?” She asked heading towards the kitchen, almost smacking herself when she should have asked if he wanted tea but the two were interchangeable apparently from what Rose’s memories told her for this early in the morning. The Doctor agreed and asked for milk. Instead of spouting out stuff about going to the police like she remembered had happened, Rose worked quietly to listen to what he was saying.“That’s not going to work. He’s gay and she’s an alien… Sad ending. Rose Tyler!” The blonde jumped a bit as he read the letter but rolled her eyes as he continued, “Ah could have been worse. Look at the ears!” She nearly snorted when she heard that but stirred his coffee quietly.“Luck be the lady!”“You’re picking those up if you drop ‘em!” Rose said not turning around.“Have you got a cat?” He asked suddenly.“No. We use to but we kept getting strays.” The girl said as she turned around and saw the Doctor with the plastic arm around his neck.“Doctor!” She yelped before racing over to pull it off of him. With a few good tugs, it came off but then went straight for her. Within a few seconds, the Doctor was able to stop if from moving with the light whirring of his sonic screwdriver.“Ah! Look there. See? Armless!” He giggled at his own joke. Rose snorted but also glared at him before responding.“Oh really?” She quipped back, before hitting his own arm with it.“Ow!” He grumbled, grabbing at it and rushing out of the house.“Oi!” Rose yelled, racing out after him. “You can’t just go swanning off!”“Yes I can! Here I go! Swanning off!” He yelled up from a flight of stairs below.“Come on! Don’t you think I deserve some sort of explanation?” She yelled racing after him.“Not really. No.” He said calling back as he studied the arm. Rose continued to follow him as they walked out of the complex and out into the lawn.“Honestly, if that thing already tried to kill me what do you think will happen when you’re not here? Another one could come after me and I don’t have a blippy wand thing to scare it off!” The blonde said grabbing hold of his coat.“This isn’t a blippy wand thing! It’s a very important scientific tool!” He cried out indignantly.“Oh really? Then what’s it called?” Rose asked tongue in teeth grin poking out.“It’s a sonic screwdriver!”“Oh really? What are you gonna do with it? Build a cabinet then?” She snorted, biting her lip and trying not to laugh at her own joke.“Oh it does so much more then that! And besides it wasn’t after you. It was looking for me but got mixed up with you!” He said huffing lightly as they walked across a park where the boys normally played football.“Oh like what? Like the world revolves around you?” The girl asked smirking.“Sort of. Yeah.”“Oh you think you’re so impressive.”“I am impressive!” He grumbled.“Go on then… I think I’ve seen enough. You can tell me.” She said wrapping her arm around his as they walked. “All this plastic stuff… Who else knows about it?”“No one… Just me.”“You mean you’re on your own?” Rose asked knowing the Doctor did not do well on his own.“Well who else? You lot all you do is eat chips, go to bed and watch the telly! While underneath you, there’s a war going on.”“Okay then.” She said grabbing the arm from him, “Start from the beginning. If you were able to stop this… then how are we gonna stop what happened at Hendricks from happening again?” His eyebrows were high on his brow as he looked at her, surprise evident on his face.“The thing controlling the plastic was broadcasting a signal to the arm. So I cut off the signal. Dead.”“So what like radio control? Or something else? You’d think some weird Radio station would have caught some attraction by now.” She thought aloud puzzling through it even though she knew the answer.“Thought control… You alright?” He asked looking at her.“Yeah. But what for? I mean not much you can do with shop window dummies.” Rose smirked, “Is someone trying to take over Britan’s shops?” The pair both started laughing as the Doctor shot the idea down.“It’s not a price war.” He said causing them to giggle again, “They want to over through the human race. Do you believe me?”“Before yesterday? I wouldn’t…" Rose thought over everything the new memories had shown her, "But now? With my job being blown up, strange man coming to my flat, and nearly being killed by a disembodied plastic hand? Yes, I would believe you.”“But you’re still here.”“Really… Doctor tell me… Who are you?” Rose asked knowing what he was going to say and honestly she couldn’t wait to feel it herself. He turned towards her with a skeptical look on his face.“Do you know like we were sayin'? About the Earth revolving?” He asked, walking back towards the blonde, “It's like when you're a kid. The first time they tell you that the world's turning and you just can't quite believe it 'cos everything looks like it's standin' still. I can feel it.” He took her hand and for a split second she could feel it. Everything he was talking about and it was marvelous. She never wanted to let go.“The turn of the Earth. The ground beneath our feet is spinnin' at 1,000 miles an hour and the entire planet is hurtling around the sun at 67,000 miles an hour, and I can feel it. We're fallin' through space, you and me, clinging to the skin of this tiny little world, and if we let go...” His hand slipped from hers and Rose was jolted at the sudden loss of feeling, “That's who I am. Now, forget me, Rose Tyler. Go home.” He said waving the hand in her face. Rose watched him turn and walk away, towards that impossible blue box and sighed. The humming in her mind grew strong and the blonde watched as the TARDIS disappeared, the noise sounding almost as wonderful as the song. In all honesty, Rose should have expected it but when plastic not Mickey called her talking about pizza, she groaned. They just had to take Mickey didn’t they? Well, they’ll get what’s coming to them soon enough. With the restaurant trashed and Not-Mickey banging on the metal door behind her, Rose raced towards the gate nearly missing the TARDIS in the corner of her eye.“What’s that?” Rose asked pointing towards the Old Girl trying not to smirk.“Our ticket out of here. Come on then.” The Doctor said grinning as the door swung open and he stepped in. The blonde grinned at his back and raced in after him.“Go on then. Say it.”“Its…” Rose looked around the room still slightly baffled as she had been the first time she had seen it. The television could have never done her justice. The lights flickering and the warm glow all around. The humming was as clear as she had ever heard it and it made the blonde want to cry.“She’s gorgeous.” Rose murmured almost to herself.“She? Why would you say she?” He asked plugging Not-Mickey’s head into the console to trace the signal.“That’s what ships are, right? This is a ship and that humming is defiantly feminine.” She said grinning widely. The TARDIS hummed in appreciation lights slightly flickering.“Oh, she likes you. That’s new.” He muttered as he looked around the time rotor at the blonde, “So where do you want to start?”“Is Mickey dead?” She asked, sniffling trying to play a distraught companion.“Who?”“The boy whose head you pulled off? Is he gonna be alright? He’s my best friend!” Rose glared at him.“Didn’t think of that…”“Oh you didn’t? And now you’re just gonna let him melt?” She said looking at the head as it bubbled and deflated in front of her.“Melt? No! No. No. No. No! Dang it. I lost the signal.” He grumbled, racing out.“Honestly he’s just going to leave that goop of melted plastic on your console? How have you put up with him?” She grumbled telepathically with the ship. “I’ll make sure he apologizes after a stop on the rift alright? He shouldn’t leave his messes around for you to clean up. You’re not his mum.” The ship hummed appreciatively before shooing her out after the Doctor with a light vibration of the floor. Rose giggled and raced out and looked at the docks in front of her.“We’ve moved? How? I didn’t feel flight… Maybe it disappears and reappears?” The Doctor looked at her shocked as the girl processed what she already knew but he shrugged, “Is it alien?”“Yes.” He said nodding.“Are you alien?” She asked a small smile appearing on her face.“Yes… Is that alright?” “Alright? It’s a bit fantastic don’t you think?” Rose said with a tongue in teeth grin. Another surprised look but shook it off as she asked another question.“If you’re alien, then why do you sound like you’re from the North?”“Lots of planets have a North!”“Alright, Alright…. Whats a Public police box?”“It’s a disguise! From the nineteen-fifties! She’s called the TARDIS. Its Time and Relative Dimension In Space.” He grinned stroking the wooden panels.“So what’s with who’s controlling the plastic? It doesn’t like us?”“Oh no it loves you. Plenty of smoke and oil. Bunch of toxins and dioxins in the air, perfect. It’s just what the Nestene Consciousness needs. Its food source was destroyed in the war. Lots of its protein planets rotted. So earth? Dinner!”“Any way to stop it? Or at least move it?” Rose asked.“Well I’ve got anti-plastic, and move it? Where?”“I mean if it can control things with its mind then it’s got to be sentient, right? So we’ve got to give it a chance.” He gave the blonde girl a small smile, nodding lightly.“I like the way you think, Rose Tyler. But, first off, I’ve got to find it. How do you hide something so big in a town like this?”“Hide what?”“The transmitter. The Nestene is controlling every single piece of plastic in the world, so it needs a transmitter to boost the signal. It’d have to be massive smack dab in the middle of London. A dish that big must be invisible.” As they walked, the London Eye was revealed and Rose had to stop herself from snorting. She hummed and the Doctor looked at her funny.“What?” The blonde nodded towards the Eye, smirking to herself.“What?” He asked again and this time she did snort.“Wha-Oh… Fantastic!”And then again with the running.They arrived into the shadow of the Eye and then the Doctor spoke again.“Think about it. Plastic all over the world coming to life. The shop dummies, the phones, the wires the cables-”“The breast implants.” Rose gasped jokingly.“The Consciousness must be somewhere underneath.” The blonde raced towards the river and saw the entrance while calling the Doctor over. He agreed with her and they raced into the underground. They found Mickey and Rose glared at the Doctor. But she knew why he withheld the information that he might be alive. The blonde nearly groaned when the Doctor asked the vat of living plastic to ‘shunt off.’When the Autons grabbed hold of the Doctor and pulled out the anti-plastic, Rose decided that it was time to step in. If she didn’t people would die and she did not want that to happen. The Nestene revealed the TARDIS and when Rose heard the Doctors pleas about the war, her heart hurt for him and what he had lost. She asked the Doctor what was happening. When he said that the Nestene was starting the invasion, Rose knew what had to be done. She knew that she didn’t have time to let Mickey try and persuade her not to do it and just ran for the chain.“You know what? I’ve got no job, no A-levels, no future… But I’ll tell you what I have got! A medal in the Jericho Street Juniors under 7 gymnastics team. I got the Bronze!” She yelled swinging on the chain towards the Auton that held the vial and quickly knocking it in. The Auton fell and the cap fell of the anti-plastic and the Nestene screamed. The Doctor was able to throw the second dummy in and caught the blonde in the same go.“Rose! Now we’re in trouble!” He said giddily before they turned and ran up the remaining stairs to the TARIDS. Mickey clamored in after them and the TARDIS took off as the Nestene screamed. Rose looked around the TARDIS taking in its smell since she wasn’t able to the first time. She could honestly say she had never smelt anything like it but it smelt very much like home. The Tardis landed and Mickey was out the door stumbling over his own feet. Rose followed him slower and smirked.“Fat lot of good you were!” She grumbled at him. The blonde turned and smiled at the Doctor who stood in the door way of the TARDIS.“Nestene Consciousness? Easy.”“You would have been dead if it weren’t for me!” She pointed out tongue in cheek smile peering out again.“Yes… I would have. Thank you… Well I’ll be off then. Unless… I don’t know. You could come with me.” He said smiling, “This box isn’t just a London hopper. It goes anywhere in the universe free of charge.”“Don’t! He’s… He’s alien!” Mickey whimpered grabbing onto her leg.“He is not invited. So what do you say, Rose Tyler? You could stay here and live your life away. Or you could come with me.”“Is it always this dangerous?” She asked smiling.“Yes.”Mickey quickly wrapped his arms around her waist.
“As if that’d stop me from going.”
“My Wolf… Make him ask twice. He needs to know how special you are.” A soft voice filled her head and it was so quiet it was more of an impression then a voice but she got the meaning. The TARDIS was always a funny thing.“You know… I can’t… I’ve got to see my mum… and take care of this… mess.” She said gesturing to Mickey who whimpered into her side.“Okay… See you around.” Rose could hear the disappointment in his tone and she actually teared up as the door closed and the box began to disappear. Within a matter of seconds, they were gone; the song in her head only barely fading.“Come on then… Let’s go.” She choked out voice cracking. Rose turned to a slack jawed Mickey who was still clinging to her side. She pulled him up and began to walk slowly away. The TARDIS noise was such a relief to hear and she had to choke back a sob as it re-materialized in the same spot.“Did I mention? It also travels in time.” The Doctor asked poking his head out smirking. The blonde turned to Mickey grinning like a fool.“Thanks.”“For what?”“Exactly.” She smiled and then pecked him quickly on his cheek before racing towards the TARDIS. The humming grew in her mind and finally, Rose Tyler was home.
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
“Alright then. Rose Tyler. Which way do you want to go? Backwards or Forwards?”“Forwards.” She smirked.“How far?”“A hundred years?” Some quick knob turns and switch flipping later, the Doctor grinned and pointed at the door.“Outside is the 22nd century. Bit boring that though. Let’s go farther.” More dancing around the console as it wheezed. A thud and again with the pointing. “Ten thousand years in the future. Its 12005. The New Roman Empire.”“Oh you think you’re so impressive!” Rose laughed, tongue in teeth smile poking out.“Oi! I am impressive! Alrighty then. I know exactly when to go.” Lot more flittering about the console and a bit of a rough ride later, The Doctor just turned and pointed towards the door.“What’s out there?” She asked grinning. He smirked and shrugged, still pointing towards the door. The girl laughed and raced to it pulling it open and smiled as she looked out onto Platform One for the first time. They had landed in one of the privet suites and the sun shield was up blocking out the view. As she walked towards it the Doctor did some poking and it lowered to reveal the Earth below.“You lot all you think about is death. How its gonna come about. By eggs or beef, global warming or asteroids. Never once imagined that you might just make it. This is the year. 5.5/apple/26. Five billion years in your future and this is the day. Hold on.” “Pause for dramatic effect.” She thought as the Doctor looked at his watch. They both turned and watched as the sun blossomed into a bigger ball of fire. “This is the day the sun expands. Welcome to the End of the World.”“So when it says guest… Does that mean… people?” Rose asked as the computer voice rang out about shuttles and the schedule and something about the use of religion. “Depends on your definition of people.” The Doctor said smirking as they walked.“So, aliens then?” She asked as they turned a corner. The Doctor pulled out the sonic and began fiddling with a panel trying to get the door open before answering her question.“Exactly. The great and the good are all here on this… observation deck to watch the planet burn. And when I say great and good, I mean the rich.”“So why are all the continents the same? I thought they moved; shifted?”“That there is a classic Earth. It’s been in the hands of the National Trust for a while and you see that? There? Gravity satellites holding back the sun. I’d say the Earth has about 30 minutes before it gets roasted.”“And you’re not going to save it? Aren’t there people down there?” She asked already knowing but it was needed to be asked.“I’m not saving it this time. Nobody’s down there, you’ve all moved on. Man-kind is said to be scattered throughout the stars.”“Then I guess that means I’m the only one left.”“Who the hell are you?!” A voice from their left barked out. A blue humanoid figure stepped forward from around the pillar looking distraught as he laid eyes upon them.“Oh that’s lovely!” The Doctor muttered under his breath.“The guests have disembarked they’re on their way right now!” The steward grumbled.“Ah yes! See! That’s us!” The Doctor said smiling. He held up the wallet that Rose knew contained the physic paper, “See? I’m the Doctor and the is Rose Tyler! She’s my plus one.”“Oh. Right. Of course. Apologies, etcetera. If you’re here, then we had better get started.” The steward turned around and called all the servants to their places. The Doctor nodded as he announced them but his smile faltered when he heard about gifts. He began to pat himself down looking for what he could give as the trees from the forest of Cheem entered. He was still patting himself down and as she took the small cutting of a tree from Jabe, Rose pulled on her hair and gave her the stands that came out in return.“Thank you.” The Doctor mutter to her in between guests as she continued to lightly pull loose strands from her hair to give. “I was just going to give her air from my lungs.”“Wouldn’t that have been like snogging her? I mean. She is part tree.” Rose grinned. The Doctor flushed and she took the opportunity to hide behind him as Moxx rolled up and spat in the Doctors face. The blonde held her tongue as the small blue man rolled away before snorting lightly at the slightly disgusted look the Doctor had on his face. She was about to ask if he was okay when she felt a light pressure on her mind sort of like a headache and then the sound of someone knocking on a door. Honestly, Rose didn’t know what it was, but from what she could tell it was someone trying to get into her head. She tried to shut down but before she could, Rose felt the warmth and affection it had for her and how gentle the knock was. She looked around the room as more figures poured in but stopped when her eyes landed on the Face of Boe. He was looking straight at her a single large eyebrow raised.“Jack.” Her mind whispered. Rose quickly allowed him in at the realization.“Hello Rosie.” The ancient voice whispered in her mind.“Oh Jack. I didn’t want this for you. I never would have.” She whispered tears filling her eyes. Rose vaguely heard Cassandra droning on about what the Earth was supposed to be like as she slowly started to walk towards Jack. The head looked at her sadly and she got the mental image of a shrug.“I know, Rosie, but it happens. I become a fixed point. You know that. You can’t change fixed points. Besides I wouldn’t want you to. My years have been wonderful. I wouldn’t want you to change that for anything. Rose, don’t worry.” He sighed mentally before the large lips turned into a grin. Her breath caught in her throat and she bit back sob. When Cassandra said ‘Play on!’ Rose raced out of the room tears streaming down her face. She could hear Jack calling out to her mentally, but she closed him out, hoping to hide her distress from him and the Doctor. Rose could hear the TARDIS humming in the back of her head trying to soothe her. She quickly walked down a corridor and stopped to look out at the burning sun and the Earth below. Her mind was racing at a million miles an hour just trying to wrap her head around what Jack would become. Rose heard foot steps behind her. She quickly dabbed her wet eyes before turning to see another blue figure she recognized from the show. Rose could save her. She could do this one thing.“I’m not in the way right? You can speak if you want.” Rose said gesturing to the corridor.“Thank you, miss!” The woman said happily, “And no, you’re not in the way just need to check the vents.”“What’s your name?” Her memory suddenly going blank on her. The woman turned and gave a small smile.“Rufallo. I won’t take long. Just doing some maintenance.”“Um. Actually. I’ve lost my way to my suite could you show me?”“I actually can’t miss. The Face of Boe isn’t getting any hot water and I know the problem is coming from here. You’ll have to return to the main gallery for someone to help you with that.”“Oh. Um. It’s just that I’m a long way from home and I’m not quite sure I should be here.” Rose asked knowing that if she went into that vent she would never come out.“You and me both miss, but I must get to work. I’m very sorry.” Her eyes watered again for this person who didn’t know what was to come but Rose nodded and turned to walk away. “Oh and Miss? Thank you for the permission. Most people aren’t that considerate.” She barely turned her head to nod before she raced away not wanting to hear the screams that she knew would come. She found the suite actually quite easy but she felt terrible. Poor, sweet Rufallo died and no one knew. She couldn’t stop it. The TARDIS then spoke to Rose in her hushed motherly voice.“My Wolf. There are still people you can save. You need to have faith in that. Rufallo was a tipping point and if she was never taken then the board would have been notified about the infestation.” The TARDIS hummed in her mind. Waves of a soothing melody raced through and Rose sighed again thanking the TARDIS for her wisdom. She nearly jumped out of her skin when the Doctor called out to her. Rose turned at the last second to see one of those spiders running into the vent near the door. She paled but before she could question it, the Doctor burst through the door.“So what do you think?”“Oh it’s brilliant. A whole slew of new aliens. That Face is quite interesting, I must say. Bit of a flirt if you ask me.” The TARDIS hummed in the back of her mind giving her a warning but more like a bop on the head for teasing. The Doctor raised an eyebrow at her but smirked all the same. “How come I can understand them? I doubt they’re all speaking English.”“It’s a gift from the TARDIS. She gives you a telepathic translation and you just hear it in your own language.”“Oh that’s great. An alien ship that can get in my head. Why am I not surprised?” She grumbled lightly while smirking in the back of her mind.“What?” The Doctor looked surprised to hear that.“Your ship. Your alien ship got into my head and didn’t even ask? That’s just brilliant. Would have thought that by the year five billion you would have found a ship with some manners.” Rose grumbled glad that her poker face was holding up because both she and the TARDIS were cackling in the back of her head.“That’s my ship you’re talking about!” He bit back at the blonde. Rose turned and started to see clouds growing in his eyes; the Oncoming Storm approaching.“Yeah? And what about you?” She asked knowing that this was kind of a tipping point on the first journey.“What about me?”“Who are you? Where are you from?” She asked setting the twig down beside her leg.“It’s not like you would know!” He barked out hysteria beginning to set in.“Then help me. Help me understand. I just traveled five billion years into the future with you. I don’t know anything about you besides the fact that you call yourself The Doctor and that you’ve got a brilliant ship that can travel through time and space.” Rose said as he huffed and walked towards the window that looked out to the burning sun below. The silence between the pair for those few moments was crushing. He sighed harshly and Rose rolled her eyes. “Alright. As my mate Shareen says… Don’t argue with the designated driver. I can’t really call a taxi…” She said pulling out the nearly indestructible phone that she knew would be obsolete in ten years. “We’re a bit out of range.”“Here. Give it here. Because you know with a bit of Jiggery-Pokery,” He said suddenly, taking the phone and pulling out his sonic to fiddle with it.“Jiggery-Pokery… Is that a technical term?” Rose asked grinning slightly.“Yeah I came first in Jiggery-Pokery. What about you?”“Nah, I failed hullabaloo. Although Tom-foolery was one of my favorite subjects.” She said, her Rose Tyler grin poking out. He grinned and popped the cover back onto the back of the brick of a phone before handing it back to her.“Yours would be, wouldn’t it?” He asked laughing lightly. “Here you go.” She looked at him as she dialed her mum. It rang and when she finally picked up, Rose laughed slightly. Thank goodness for mums. Always keeping you grounded.“I’m fine mum. Top of the world.” She said, the Doctor laughing behind her. She hung up and Rose laughed again slightly. “Oh you are full of it.” He grinned again.“If you think that was outrageous, you should see the bill.” SHe truly laughed at that one before saying,“Yeah and you’re the one who’s gonna pay for it!” The Doctor gave the blonde an over the top look of hurt but laughed with her. Suddenly the whole of the platform shook dangerously.“That’s not supposed to happen…” The Doctor said, a sly smirk on his face as they grinned at each other before racing out. The stewards voice rang out, talking about gravity pockets which the Doctor scoffed at. They turned the corner into the main gallery and the sound of chattering rose to a fever pitch.“It’s the Bad Wolf scenario. It’s got to be.” Rose’s neck cracked, her head swiveling around, as soon as she heard the words come out of the small blue man in his mobile chair. “Did we really scatter them this far?” She thought to herself as she looked wide eyed at the alien. Another gentle knock in her head rang out and she sighed looking around to see Jack in the far corner. Rose held up a pointer finger, telling him to wait, as she turned back to the Doctor who was talking with Jabe.“-Along with your wife?” Jabe asked looking between the pair.“Honestly no. Just no.” Rose said stepping in, “I’m just a friend… a companion if you would.” The blonde said letting out a small smile. The Doctor again gave her a raised eyebrow look but shrugged it off as she spoke again, “Well go on. Go pollenate or whatever it is you kids do these days. I’m going to have a good face to face talk with the Face himself and maybe give a piece of my mind to Michel Jackson over there. I want you home by midnight mister!” She said to his back. “Don’t start a fight!” He yelled back as they turned the hall. Rose sighed turning back to Jack finally letting the presence tapping on her mind in. Jack began spouting out apologies and reassurances about what was going on but she shut him up by sticking her tongue out at him.“Jack. I’ll be fine. The TARDIS is helping me. I trust that if you say you wouldn’t change it then I won’t pry. I just want you happy, Captain.” She said giving him the mental equivalent of a shoulder bump. He sighed and his big face lit up.
“Trust me, Rose. You won’t believe it. And you’d be surprised what someone like me can do to get freaky. My wife would agree with me, were she here.”
“Married? You? I never thought I’d live to see the day. Who’s the lucky lady? Do I meet her?” She quipped and his laughter rang out through her head.“Oh. You know I can’t tell you that. Spoilers and what not.” His wide smirk was all that she needed to see to know exactly who he was married to.“Oh god. Jack… You didn’t… How did Eleven even let you that close?” Rose groaned out rubbing her face exasperatedly.
“Good to know that I can trust you with that. And when you’re a pair of enigmas both bound to the TARDIS in one way or another, you tend to run into each other even when the Doctor’s not around.”
“What about…oh… Visiting the In-laws must be fun.”
“Extremely.” Jack grumbled sighing. They both chuckled lightly.“Jack… I’m about to do something very stupid; So, don’t be surprised when I get kidnapped.” She told him walking away quickly. Rose heard half of Jack’s question before she closed the mental link. Rose talked with Cassandra for a few minutes but she knew that she had pissed her off just enough to do what was needed. The blonde turned on her heel walking briskly out of the room, shooting Jack a quick wink as she turned the corner. When the Adherents of the Repeated Meme showed up, Rose wasn’t surprised but she did try to fight. Still didn’t end up very well.[line break]When Rose came to, the computer’s voice declaring that the sun filter was lowering. This did not surprise her as much as the good sized gash she had on her arm. It had a small amount of dried blood on it, but it was still deep enough for it to scar, she quietly realized as it twisted her forearm to follow the curve of the gash. She didn’t have much time to think about it as the sun filter continued to lower so Rose did the only thing that came natural to her anymore. She screamed for help.“Alright! I’m gonna get you out of there. Who’s in there?!” The Doctor’s voice rang through the other side of the door. She yelled again as the sun filter got closer to burning her. “I just had to be you didn’t it?” She could hear him talking to himself over the whirring of the sonic as he dug through the cables. Rose gulped in a breath when the computer declared the sun filter to rise again but let it out in another scream as it began to descend again. Finally, the Doctor stopped warring with the computer getting the shields. Rose let out a heavy sigh, knowing the Doctor wouldn’t be able to get the doors open in time to save anyone. She nearly tore bits of her hair out, begging the TARDIS to help her save one person. She felt more then heard the insistent knocking again and Rose let out a happy yell.“JACK!” She yelled mentally.“ROSIE! What on Earth possessed you to do that?! You could have been killed!” He yelled at her. Rose flinched a little and sighed.
“I have to maintain the closest time lines otherwise I won’t know what’s to come. I’ve seen this and I needed to get stuck but, Jack, you have to help me. Jabe is going to burn if we can’t save her. I’m stuck but yo-“
“Who would you rather have go? Someone will burn down there and it won’t be pretty. Rose you can’t save everyone. Jabe has to go with the Doctor otherwise someone else will die. This will keep the timelines together no matter what. I know this is hard for you. I know how early this is for you, but you need to learn this now.” Jack said his voice firm. She could hear the tenseness in his mental voice. He wasn’t used to having to tell her this. More than likely, she was the one normally doing this. It probably came to a head when Ianto-.
“Jack… I’m sorry. This is all very new for me. Ianto…”
“He would have been proud of you. He would have understood. I was going to lose him eventually.”
“Can you send some repair workers this way? I want to help her guards understand what she sacrificed herself for. They need to know. Also keep everyone away from the windows. Things are about to get nasty.” She whispered images flying through the connection to Jack of what she had seen.
“The Doctor will take care of that. Besides the ship will repair itself enough to open your doors by the time he returns. Hopefully, since I sponsored the event, people will listen. Please, trust me Rosie.”
“Always and forever, Jack.” Rose sighed out loud this time, her head resting against the closed doors. She closed down her shields again but leaving them open enough if she needed to contact Jack again. The TARDIS continued to hum in her mind and she could feel her numbing the pain that she hadn’t noticed that was radiating from her arm. I think I’ll keep this. She thought looking at the flesh, red and slightly puffy, following the gash that swirled around her forearm. The TARDIS grumbled in her mind asking just exactly how she was going to keep this from the Doctor. Can you just add a slight perception filter on it? I know he won’t like it but I want to do this. It will serve as a reminder, I guess. That I should try to fix things but if I can’t then I should accept it. The scar will help me keep those thoughts in check, should I ever forget, when our Captain isn’t there to stop me. The TARDIS hummed as it thought but agreed anyway, showing her an image of the med bay while she hummed to the blonde about not letting it get infected. Rose nodded, smiling to herself before jumping when the glass started to crack in front of her. Beams of intense heat and light shone through and she dodged them, having to freeze as they all glowed brighter.When the electronic voice over head retched zero, Rose Tyler watched as the sun expanded and tore the Earth apart. Maybe it was good. The last real human on the ship would be the only one to see the planet’s demise. Truly poetic in a weird way.During the time while she was stuck in the suite, Rose spent watching pieces of the Earth float by. The TARDIS hummed mournfully, Jabe’s death bringing fresh tears to her eyes. The salt that fell down her cheeks left slightly cleaner trails in their wake, washing away the dust and grime in their path. She heard the computer voice specific to the suite say that the doors were repaired. Almost immediately after, they opened up causing her to fall on her back. Rose jumped up swearing colorfully under her breath, she rubbed the back of her head. She retracted her steps back into the gallery noticing that, unlike before, the only one who had perished in the room was Moxx. Again her heart clenched but as Rose saw everyone else holding tight onto those they had traveled with, she sighed. Her gaze swept over Jack as he nodded, his large head bobbing up and down in the fluid. Before she could reach out to him, the Doctor entered. Rose froze when she looked into his eyes. The clouds of the Oncoming Storm were brewing, his grief for the tree lady evident there. He walked past her, his eyes finally releasing the spell they had on her. He walked briskly to the two other tree people and clasped both of their shoulders firmly. Rose could hear a faint whisper of ‘so sorry’ before he turned around to face the room again. Her eyes lingered slightly longer, watching the two males comfort each other at the loss of the brave woman.“You alright?” Rose asked, her eyes landing on him again as he walked towards the blonde.“Yeah. I’m fine. I’m full of ideas. I’m bristling with them.” He said, the Storm continuing to rumble in his eyes, “Idea number one. Teleportation through five thousand degrees needs some kind of feed.” He turned, his eyes scanning the slightly jostled room before locking sight on the ‘ostrich’ egg. “Idea number two. This feed would need to be nearby.” He said picking up the egg and smashing it against the podium where it had rested. The small oval device fell out of the shell, and Rose felt herself let out a low growl from the back of her throat. Thankfully, the Doctor was in full Oncoming Storm mode and didn’t really seem to realize that she had done such a thing. Rose mentally sent the TARDIS a panicked thought before focusing back when the Doctor spoke again. “Idea number three. If your clever like I am, the teleportation feed can be reversed.” The Time Lord twisted the device, and Cassandra’s voice began to ring out into the gallery.“-should have seen the looks on their little alien faces.” She said as her form returned. When she realized where she was she sputtered quite a bit.“The last human.” The Doctor sneered, his hands still firmly grasping the teleporter.“Oh great. You passed my little test. You are now able to join the er… human club.” You could feel how fast she was back pedaling. Rose clenched her jaw as she felt another growl rumble in her throat, thankful that the sound didn’t occur a second time.“People have died, Cassandra. You murdered them.” The Doctor’s voice was cold as he stared at the talking flap of skin.“That depends on your definition of people and that’s enough of technicality to keep your lawyers dizzy for centuries. Take me to court, then. And watch as I smile and cry and flutter…” a small creaking sound was heard from her direction.“And creak?” The Doctor asked, his voice lifting with his head.“And what?” Cassandra asked surprised.“Creak. You’re creaking.”“A-ah! I’m drying out. Oh no. Moisturize me! Moisturize me! Where are my surgeons?! My lovely boys! Its. Too. Hot!” She cried her face growing wrinkled as the edges that touched the frame began to pull taught.“You raised the temperature.” The Doctor growled as he watched. Rose stepped forward slightly, walking to stand next to him.“Have pity! Moisturize me!”“Help her.” Rose whispered next to him, unable to help herself. She was vile and a cretin but no one deserved to die like that. She knew her death wouldn’t be for long but the blonde could tell it was painful.“Everything has its time. Everything dies.” He said and, together, they watched as Cassandra exploded outward, bits of skin flying over their heads. He turned to look at her before briskly walking out. Rose watched him leave and stood in the gallery as all of the other guests began to disembark. She said a quick metal good bye to Jack as he left, which he returned with what felt like a mental hug. She stood and watched bits and pieces of rock floating by the repaired window, the bright red giant burning in the distance. Rose heard the soft foot falls of the Doctor come to a stop beside her.“The end of the Earth.” Rose said, her voice cracking before chewing on her lip, “Its gone… We were all too busy saving ourselves and no one saw it go. All those years. All that history and no one was even watching.” Tears built in her eyes as she thought about how her mum would have been down there, somewhere buried in the soil. She would have lived and died down there with a daughter who rarely came home. A daughter who was traveling the stars. But Jackie Tyler would not die here. Not in this universe. She would have Pete and Tony, rich beyond her wildest dreams. Her thoughts were gently interrupted as the Doctor’s hand brushed her side.“Come with me.” He said, his voice soft and his eyes clear of the Storm. Rose looked down and grabbed his slightly colder hand, squeezing gently. They both turned and walked away from the window, heading towards the TARDIS, her song filling their heads and calming her turbulent thoughts.The time spent in the Vortex passed quickly and the landing was actually very soft. He nodded towards the door and the blonde slowly stepped out of the ship. The small alley lead out to a busy street ahead and Rose couldn’t stop herself from walking forward, stepping into the throng of people going about their merry way. Rose got so absorbed in the human faces showing so many complex emotions that she nearly jumped out of her skin when the Doctor spoke right beside her.“You think it'll last forever: people and cars and concrete. But it won't. One day it's all gone. Even the sky.” He paused, his head dipping slightly lower as his eyes grew sad and distant. “My planet's gone. It's dead. It burned, like the Earth. It's just rocks and dust. Before its time.”“What happened?”“There was a war, and we lost.” His eyes were guarded as he looked at her but a had this feeling that he wasn’t really seeing anything.“What happened to your people?” She whispered as he eyes continued to look through her.“I'm a Time Lord. I'm the last of the Time Lords. They're all gone. I'm the only survivor. I'm left traveling on my own, 'cos there's no one else.” He said, his eyes growing sadder again, if that were possible. Rose looked at him and how troubled he was. Lost in his own thoughts. She smiled softly before speaking again. “There's me.” He looked at her, his eyes growing concerned at the phrase. His mouth pressed into a line before he started his next question.“You've seen how dangerous it is — do you want to go home?”“No I don’t... I want... Oh, can you smell chips?” She asked as her stomach grumbled lightly, the smell of chips wafting in front of her nose. The Doctor took a large whiff of the air before laughing slightly.“Yeah.” He said quickly, the tension in his shoulders releasing, “Yeah!”“I want chips.” Rose said turning my head towards him and giving him the Rose Tyler smile. “Me too.”“Right then, before you get me back in that box, chips it is. And you can pay.” She grabbed his arm, looping her around his leather clad one. He grinned like an idiot before patting his pockets one handedly.“No money.” “What sort of date are you? Come on, then, tight wad, chips are on me... we've only got five billion years 'til the shops close!” They laughed together before she pulled him along. There would be time for her to sort through everything that happened before they went to Cardiff but at that moment, Rose didn’t care. It was just the Doctor and Rose Tyler traveling through time and space
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10641537
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time
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{
"Archive Warning": "No Archive Warnings Apply",
"Category": "Gen",
"Characters": "Karin (Naruto), Uchiha Sasuke",
"Fandom": "Naruto",
"Language": "English",
"Rating": "Teen And Up Audiences",
"author": "by MrHooty",
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}
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The room is small, with hardly enough breathing space for the two of them. The curtains are drawn tight, gray enough they nearly blend with the walls. She doesn't bother to switch the lights on, or offer a cup of tea, but he decides it's better that she doesn't. She hardly looks him in the eye and every word is clipped at the ends, short and curt and cold against his skin. The bed is unmade but all of her things are neatly put away where they should be. She takes great care to remove her boots at the door and fold her coat over the chair on her way in and offhandedly gestures he take a seat.That is as far as she allows by way of propriety. He does not deserve any more than this and she has finally given way to that.Perhaps she's come to her senses. Or, more realistically, she has grown tired of his telling her to.She has not grown any taller but her jawline is sharper, the pinch of her waist and the swell of her bust more defined. There is a new hardness behind her gaze that was not there before, no longer just a mistaken shadow he only notices in passing. Her hair has grown, tumbles less like waterfall and more like hungry flame down the curve of her back, and at one side her scalp is almost shaved clean. There is less skin to draw the eye, she has taken to a more modest outfit; that which does not cling or hang loose, that which is practical and conservative and flattering all at once.When he stares too long, she adjust her glasses by the rim and turns to peel at the edges of a plastic bag on the desk."Been working odd jobs mostly," she answers his unspoken question. "Keep myself afloat while I figure things out.""You won't settle?" he asks, dragging his gaze away to trace the age spots on the ceiling. "There's still—""The world got quiet all of a sudden," she interrupts, what she never would have done before. "There's a ringing left behind, you know? It's terribly loud and I can't keep my head straight all the time. If I keep moving, don't gotta think about it too much."On the nightstand, there is a case for her glasses, a small hardcover novel, and an even smaller sewing kit."Gives me an excuse to go sight-seeing. I don't stay longer than I need to and it all works itself out.".x.She doesn't bat a lash, doesn't even offer a hand when she sees him struggling with the chopsticks. She watches with placid eyes, leans forward to blow the steam from her bowl and ignores the whispers from the other table. She lifts her chin and slurps her noodles and does not spare a single nicety.When she glances up, he taps his wrist against the table edge and corrects his hold."It's not much," she tells him, pausing to dab at her mouth delicately. The way she would have done before. "But it is the cleanest place to eat in this village."There is a spider weaving above the entrance, and a line of small ants crawling past the leg of their table. A fine layer of dust coats his knuckle when he pauses long enough to check, but he chooses to believe her.In one sense of the word, he is sitting for dinner with a stranger and he's in no place to think her a liar at this point."If you would," she says, waving a hand toward his cooling cup of tea. "It would be a waste to let anything here go untasted."He takes a sip."It's not much," she reiterates, folding her napkin. "But one learns to adapt.""And so you have," he replies.A ghost of a smile softens her lips, no longer painted in her favorite gloss.It does not reach her eyes..x."I'll get back to the labs as soon as I have my wits about me again," she assures, reaching up absentmindedly to run her fingers over the tiny bristly hairs above her ear. "I just need some…peace of mind right now.""I don't mean to hurry you," he says, pulling his cloak more securely about him. "But I've gotten quite a few messages expressing concern over you.""I'd imagine that'd be cause for annoyance. I apologize, on his behalf. He means well, I'm sure." The dirt skitters under her boots and she tucks her hair behind her other ear. "Tell him… Just tell him I'll be back soon."The questions die on his lips. What silence stretches between them is no longer comfortable, no longer familiar. He cannot read her face the way he could have before, the inward curve of her shoulders and the thin line her mouth forms are as much a mystery as the way her fingers now graze and scratch and prod along the prickling red hairs—and that, too, remains a question he cannot possibly ask.Her fingers drift and then curl into the longer hair behind her head and she heaves a sigh."I just need time alone."This, he understands all too well..x."I'm trying to make it up to her," he says as they near the motel. This is a lesser side of the village, one he might have cautioned to avoid had he been any other man.She doesn't ask who he means. There's a flicker behind her eyes, a mere flash of who she once was that is gone too fast for him to catch, and she allows only the slightest nod in understanding. "I wish you luck in that endeavor," she says as brusquely as she has the entire night.The moon is but a sliver and it hardly illuminates her pale face, hardly casts her guarded expression in light enough to see, but he knows what she's thinking and he almost wants her to say it aloud."I want to make things right," he insists, more to himself than her at this point.Her head tilts to the side only a little and it is now he realizes they have stopped walking. They stand in the middle of the road facing one another, both tense and wary and nothing at all like he thinks they might have been at one time.It reminds him of the first night he attempted, with clumsy hand, to pull his fingers through pink hair. It makes his jaw ache with the memory of a clenched fist, how hard and distrustful those green eyes had been.These eyes are much the same, but there's something so cold and so dignified and so very sharp about them he almost tastes blood rising at the back of his throat. They sink into him like ice and he has to drag his gaze away before he can lose his footing.No you don't, they say to him, but her brow only furrows and she drops her hand to her side.Aloud she says, "Whether you can or not is entirely up to her."And perhaps it's just that.Under the moonlight her hair looks like blood and her eyes gleam just like a blade. She cannot crush him underneath her fists but the same feelings of guilt and longing and despair boil inside of him and it drives him forward, cracks against his spine and his ribs and up his throat and clutches the back of her neck.Her skin is colder and smoother and the harsh contrast of crescent shaped scars is a terrible shock but he doesn't pause to think about it for a second. Her lips don't taste sweet or forgiving or even just a little bit sorry but she grits her teeth just the same and she balls her hands and shoves against his chest and in this way he can almost pretend they're the same person."I am not her," she hisses, and it's just like steel against his nerves. He shivers and it is not from pleasure."No," he relents, and drops his gaze when she drags the back of her hand across her mouth spitefully. "No.".x.They are unsurprisingly back to square one by the time they reach her room. She will not look him in the eye and she does not welcome him inside. She leaves the door open behind her and kicks her boots off at the door, crosses the room to her packs and begins to rifle through them purposefully."You can stay or you can go," she tells him, folding a fresh pair of pajamas over her arm. She disappears into the bathroom without another word, and a moment later the shower switches on.He shuts the door behind him..x.When he wakes, her side of the bed has long grown cold.There is no parting note or heartfelt keepsake left behind for him to mull over, but the message is crystal clear.He washes his face in the sink and stops on his way out to squint back at the room for a second. There was a time she would have thrown a small fit if they'd chosen a place like this to stay in, and a time she would have demanded to share a bed with him regardless. She had not forced a wall of pillows between them last night but she had scooted as far into the edge as she could without falling off, had cast a glance over her shoulder in warning before tugging the sheets up to her ear and settling down for sleep.He hadn't heard the telltale snoring but had found himself so suddenly overcome with exhaustion he couldn't bother staying up long enough to figure out if she'd actually passed out or not.Had he chosen to, he might have been able to catch her on the way out.But what he would have said, he didn't know.His tongue is still too heavy for apologies, and there lies the guarantee that she would not accept them to begin with.Reality is slow to catch up, but his hand clenches tightly at the memory.There is perhaps a new scar on her body that had not been put there by choice, one she shielded from sight with as much devotion as she had once gazed upon him.Another shiver runs down his spine, and it has nothing to do with the chill of approaching rain..x.
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10610769
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Doctor Ren
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{
"Archive Warning": "Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings",
"Category": "F/M",
"Characters": "Kylo Ren, Ben Solo | Kylo Ren, Leia Organa, Rey (Star Wars)",
"Fandom": null,
"Language": "English",
"Rating": "Mature",
"author": "by dickren",
"chapters": "3/3",
"completed": "",
"published": "2017-04-13T00:00:00",
"words": "13,431",
"Additional Tags": "a small lil something i was requested to do, and turned it into a mini series, so like 3-4 chapters, and its a, modern!kylo, along with, doctor!ren, so yeah wooohooo, NSFW, Smut",
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It felt quite liberating when the constant realization that you were done with med school had hit you. Although you had already wet your feet a while back while interning in the Resistance hospital, it felt completely different when you were now an actual nurse. It was your first day and you were more excited than anything.Although the anxiety liked to creep in every now and then, you constantly reminded yourself that this was what you wanted for a very long time.There were a few people you knew in the hospital no thanks to your internship. A fellow student by the name of Rey had also been interning alongside you, instantly becoming friends. Then there was a paramedic (aside from a very intimidating woman named Phasma) you had met by the name of Poe who was very social and an absolute sweetheart. You also met another intern whose name was Finn.Finn was very new to it all, you meeting him on your last days so you knew he wouldn't be working with you--if he did end up working at the same hospital--for a while.Looking down at your red-orange scrubs as you patted them down, making sure they didn't look too wrinkly, you made your way down a rather quiet hall and towards the head of the hospitals office. Of course, you had met the owner before, but you never really had one on one with her until now.Stopping at the door that read her last name, you swallowed before knocking. Today, you were going to be 'assigned' to a doctor and more than likely meet and work alongside them. Although you had hoped it was no other than doctor Skywalker--as he had been the one with you through your internship--you had a feeling that wasn't going to be it.After all, Rey had informed you she was going to be taken under his wing. "Come in!" The voice called out, you opening the door and giving the woman a smile. "Oh, hello! You must be nurse y/n?" Nodding your head, she stood up and walked towards you. "Leia Organa...or, simply, Leia." Sticking out her hand as she gave you a sweet smile, you took hers in your own as you shook it."Good morning, Leia." You bowed your head."Please, sit." Gesturing her hand for you to sit on one of the two chairs parallel to her own, you did so. "I won't take too much of your time as you must be anticipating your first patient..." Taking a seat before interlocking her fingers and lying her hands on the table, she looked at you."Most definitely." You nodded, giving her a toothy grin as you were more than thrilled."Wonderful! Well, I've noticed that you worked quite well with doctor Skywalker, but his team is filled up as Rey took the last spot. I'm sure you know Rey?" She pointed her hand as you nodded. "So, I've decided to assign you the next best doctor in this hospital who was once under Skywalkers guidance, eventually left to another team because he felt he wasn't given sufficient credit--but that's a story for another time." Leia waved her hand as your brows raised. "Anyway, you will be working as an assistant to doctor Ren.""Doctor Ren?" You furrowed your brows, heart suddenly sinking. "Doctor Ren?" You repeated as the woman nodded."Yes, doctor Ren...is there something wrong?" She questioned as you instantly shook your head, not realizing how hot your face now was."N-no..." You stuttered."Oh, good. He has his own team already of six others, but they are well on their own. Since you are new, you will be by his side most of the time before you get used to it and can handle things on your own." Leia spoke as you gulped. "For now, doctor Ren will be guiding you around and getting you into the swing of things."Feeling your heart thud against your chest as you took in deep breaths, you simply smiled at her, knowing very well your blushing cheeks must've been obvious. "O-okay. That's-thats fair."Noticing your sudden uneasiness, Leia narrowed her brows. "Are you okay? Is the anxiety getting to you? You'll be fine, I've read your files and I've seen you first hand, you will do great!" She assured as you blinked."Yes, yes...I'm fine." You lied. Your heart was beating faster than it has ever. If you weren't nervous before, you definitely were now. "I appreciate your faith.""I always have faith in my people." She proudly spoke. "And I know you will fit in just fine."Slowly nodding your head, you tried steadying your breathing. How could you have possibly forgotten about Ren? He was the one man you wanted to punch, both with your fist and your lips. Every time you saw him around the hospital, you always gawked. And every time he spoke to you, you felt like you were melting. You also felt like slamming your palm against his cheek whenever he got too snarky with you.The man was a wonder, he was hard to swallow at times but knew his way around you. It was almost as if he purposefully taunted you whenever you were around. You couldn't stand it, yet, you enjoyed the attention. As brooding as he was at times, he was also very cocky and smug. It messed with your emotions, you were constantly on a rollercoaster when he was around; but you enjoyed the adrenaline.You could easily remember the day you had first met him. It was while watching Skywalker taking care of a patient. Though you had a small group with you of five students, you all had to sit outside and watch. Of course, everyone was hogged up at the window and you couldn't see a thing so you pulled in a chair and stood on it to watch.You didn't think it was a bad idea at first, although you were sort of blocking the hallway, but the second one of the interns moved back (not noticing you were there) you went falling back. To say the least, you were embarrassed.What you assumed to have been the ground that you fell on was actually a man. Your whole backside was practically on top of him--and the worst part was that your ass had landed right on his groin and you felt everything. And by everything, you meant everything.At first, you were in shock from the fall as your heart was racing, but when you felt something against your behind, you realized you were in a bad situation.The second you removed yourself from the person you brought down with you, to the second you stood up and reached out a hand for them, you realized you made a massive mistake. Not only was he a doctor, he was also a very good looking doctor.There was no lie in saying you were traumatized. The man had mumbled something along the lines of 'that's not how I like women on me' but you completely dismissed it with your panic. He had also helped himself up, towered in front of you and eyed the pass hanging from around your neck, realizing you were an intern.You remembered how fast your heart fluttered, the way you stared up at him, unable to look away as he had simply bent forward, grabbed your lanyard and read the pass."For a future reference, I suggest you be careful. Of course, unless you'd like to land on a patient." Now those words you instantly remembered as he had looked you in the eye, a raised brow and crossed arms as he had spoken. You were so very embarrassed and shaken up, possibly why you avoided him most of the time; which was inevitable when he would constantly go to you "the one who fell on me."He had many variations of nicknames for you: klutz, bulldozer, cannonball, "the only woman capable of knocking a man my size down" and plenty of others. It grew to a point that you'd simply respond before he could even come up with a new one, it was enough that you were haunted by the thought. Eventually, you'd fire back with "a man your size couldn't catch me?" or "it's sad that someone half your size slammed you against the floor" and he grew quite fond of the sudden remarks.You just never expected that you'd have to work alongside him for who knows how long."Doctor Ren should be here in any minute," Leia looked at her watch as she spoke, snapping you back to reality. "He may be a bit too strong at first, but I promise you he'll loosen up. You'll grow to like him."Biting your tongue as you knew very well it wasn't going to be that easy for you, you gave her a nod before hearing the door open. "Sorry, Organa, first patient of the day took most of my time.""I thought we said you'd save them for when you took nurse y/n with you?" She spoke through gritted teeth as you kept your eyes focused on her desk.Turning his attention from his mother, over to you, a small smirk grew on his lips. "Ah, yes...of course. Nurse y/n." He spoke, the sound of your name slipping off of his tongue causing your body to shiver. "Well, they insisted I see them. It was quite urgent." He nodded, keeping his focus on you as he eyed your rather tense frame."Very well..." Leia sighed. "At least there are plenty more, this hospital is very busy." Taking in small, deep breaths as you could feel Ren's eyes boring into the side of your head, you scratched the area as you tried blocking him from your peripheral view. Sadly, your hair was in a half up-half down do, so you couldn't rely on it to block anything.Till this very day, you could feel the imprint his groin left on your ass."The more the merrier. I've had enough of Hux getting all the patients. It's enough Snoke retired and gave him all his old patients." Ren spoke in annoyance, rolling his eyes as Leia shook her head."This isn't a competition, Be-...Kylo." She narrowed her eyes. "These are actual people, human lives-""I know, I know. Sheesh, I was joking." He crossed his arms, turning his attention back to you. "I'm just saying...the more patients, the more experience our lovely nurse gets." He smirked, you sitting up in your spot as you knew he meant you. "Speaking of which, I think I have another patient waiting for me...""Y/n?" Leia spoke up, you shooting your head up."Uh, yeah..." Lowering your hand from your head, you stood up. "Thank you, Leia. It was a pleasure meeting you." Reaching out a hand, Leia took it and shook it."Likewise, my dear. Good luck!" She grinned as you gave her a small nod.Sucking in your breath, you turned around and sighed. It was now or...now, you really had no choice. You had to confront him. He was your mentor now. "Doctor Ren." Bowing your head, you then walked passed him, his eyes following you."Nurse y/n..." Shivering again, you tightened your fist. You hated the advantage he had over you.Looking back over at his mother, he smirked before walking out, shutting the door behind him. "I am so very sorry, y/n...that boy is going to be a handful." Shoving her face into her hands, Leia sighed."My lovely little devise is now under my watch. Who would've thought?" Ren spoke from behind you, you rolling your eyes. You couldn't let him think for a second that he made you flustered in any way."I don't know...I thought I'd end up with Skywalker. He seems like a better fit." Feeling his smirk drop into a thin line as his jaw tightened, you simply shrugged as you walked ahead of him."I'm far better than Skywalker. Believe me.""Really?" You questioned, looking over your shoulder. "I could've sworn he was the top doctor...then it was you."Knowing very well you were just trying to get under his skin, he rolled his shoulders and walked over to you. "I promise you, plenty of my patients come back for me. Even for small things." Narrowing your brows, you turned your head and realized he was right there. "I guess I have that charm." Walking off as he had nearly said those words in your face, you shook your head.He was supposed to look over you? Not the other way around? You seemed like a better fit than he did!"Whatever you say, Ren." Following him behind, you made your way over to the room the patient had been waiting in.Never in your time interning had you seen Ren in action. Most of the time when you saw him was on small breaks or when he would walk by. So, you braced yourself for a rather straight forward and self absorbed man to attack the patient.But, instead, you got the total opposite of it. From the second he walked in to the second he put the disposable gloves on, it was like he was a totally different man all together. He was respectful and kind, he smiled at the patient and was rather gentle. You, on the other hand, were in complete shook."This is nurse y/n, she will be working alongside me." He introduced you as you simply smiled. You never imagined this cold man to be so caring. You guessed it only made sense with his job. After all, he was caring for and treating people.What made the situation all the better was the fact that he was dealing with a kid around the age of eight. So when he spoke to them, he'd crouch down or lean forward, constantly giving them an assuring pat on the shoulder or knee and reassuring them that everything was fine.It almost made you puke at how cute he was being. Almost.Sure, you were very attracted to this man--physically--but, you didn't think his personality would win you over. Give him a few more patients, he's just acting like this 'cause he's dealing with a kid.And were you wrong. So very wrong. After seeing almost a dozen patients, your jaw grew closer and closer to the ground. He was kind to everyone he was caring for. Was this actually the Ren you knew? Or did he have a twin you didn't know about?Why wasn't he like this with you or anyone else in the hospital? Why did he only act such way towards the patients? Did he really do it to gain more of them like he mentioned earlier?That could be it. But was it? It didn't sit right. Although you very much wanted to believe it."If the pain comes back, please come and see me. If not, you're good to go and just take these twice a day, every twelve hours." Handing a prescription to the old man who he had just helped get up from his spot, you watched with a soft expression. At this point, you could say 'aw' and not even notice it. Why was he so nice to them?"Thank you, kind sir." The patient nodded. "And to you, young lady." He smiled over at you as you simply waved, Ren looking at you and grinning."Have a good day." You spoke as the man walked out, Ren holding the door.Moving to change the sheet on the bed as you heard the door shut, you let out a small breath. Maybe now was your chance to take a break and collect yourself. After what you had experienced, you weren't sure how to perceive the doctor.Believing you were now alone in the exam room, you turned in your spot and nearly jumped. "Doctor?" You questioned as the man stood there, watching you with a devious look on his face."You're impressed." Seeing one end of his lips curl up, you gulped."Impressed?" You questioned. "By?""Did you honestly think I'd be cold hearted to my patients?" He raised a brow, slowly walking over to you as your heart began to flutter in your chest. "I'm not all that bad, y/n.""Are you sure about that?" Your voice nearly faltered. "You don't treat me the way you treat your patients.""Would you look me to?" He raised a brow, making his way closer and closer to you as you fell still, although wanting to back up. "Would that make you happy?""I...I-""I could if you'd like. Better for you, I could be very nice to you." Gulping at the sound of his voice lowering, you blinked."Then...then do it." You held your ground. "And don't hold the incident against me any longer, it was once.""Oh, when you fell on me?" He questioned as you simply bit your inner cheek. "Why would I want to forget that? For once, a woman was dominant on me." Feeling your breath hitch, your eyes widened."It-it was an accident. Okay? I didn't purposefully do it." Tightening your fists as your body began to shake--not in anger, but in anticipation--Ren came to a stop in front of you."Okay." He nodded with a smug look on his face, as if he didn't believe you. "But, I'm sure you don't regret it.""W-what? Of course I do!" You exclaimed. "It was embarrassing! I knocked down a damn doctor in the middle of the hallway!""It's not embarrassing." Ren shook his head, moving his hands onto your own to loosen up your fists. "It was rather...entertaining. I'll be honest, I wasn't having a good day but that...that made it better.""Really?" You nearly perked as he nodded, slowly moving his hands up your bare arms as goosebumps began to grow on your skin, Ren feeling them and grinning."Really..." Stopping his hands on your upper arms, one of them moved to lie on your left cheek as he leaned in. Fluttering your eyes as you could feel his breathing fanning on the side of your face and neck, he whispered into your right ear. "Specially when your ass pressed up against me."Gasping as your eyes widened, your stomach turned, knees pressing together as a sudden feeling grew in between your thighs. "R-Ren..." You muttered, as if trying to say something but unable to.Leaning back, the thumb on the hand pressed against you moved, brushing against your bottom lip as your lips were slightly parted, eyeing him in shock. "Shhh..." He hushed. "It's okay, I won't hold it against you." Leaning in the slightest, he whispered, "It was just an accident."Shifting your eyes down to his plump lips, you had the sudden urge to close the gap then and there, only to hold back as he then leaned away, lowering his hand.Walking away from you, Ren came to a stop and looked over his shoulder, smirking. "Take a small break, I think you'll need it."
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
"Take a small break, I think you'll need it." Watching the man walk out of the examine room, you let out the biggest breath. It was almost as if you had held it in the entire time. You never thought you'd feel that flustered around the man. Sure, he was very attractive, but he was also quite vexing. Yet, here you were, knees weak with a thudding heart.For a moment you had forgotten how to walk, standing there frozen, staring at the door as if he'd walk back in and just slam you up against the wall for a heavy make out. As much as it was fun to fantasize, this is your first day and he is your mentor. "I need air..."Fanning your face to cool it off from the heat suffocating it, you rushed out of the examine room and made your way down the hall. Although you were very shaken up by the situation, you were glad it didn't get to a point where you had to change your underwear."Y/n?" Hearing a voice call out, you stopped in your tracks. "Y/n!" Instantly being tackled in a hug from behind, you were turned around, greeted by Rey's wide smile. "How's your day?""Hey!" You smiled back. "Mine...mine has been eventful...lots of patients." Nodding your head, you bit your inner lip at the thought of Ren."Oh, I can imagine. I've seen about thirteen today." Rey spoke with a nod. "Wanna join me for a late lunch? I finally got a break."Instantly agreeing, Rey interlocked her arm with your own, walking alongside you to the cafeteria. "Thirteen? I got ten. Not complaining, it's been like four hours on my first day and it's a Monday.""Just you wait, I'm sure more patients will appear." She pointed out, the two of you getting in line to buy food and discussing a few things--mainly patient stories, you leaving Ren out each time. She hadn't know about Ren being the doctor you were assigned to, but, she was well aware of your crush on him."How's Skywalker? I haven't seen him at all. I did, however, see Poe from afar but he was in a rush so I didn't bother to say hi." You shrugged, paying for your food and going for a table."He's great, really loves what he does which is what matters. I actually get to be with Finn from time to time which is fun." Rey smiled as the two of you sat down."Aw, lucky. I hope to see him around, as well." Digging into your food as you hadn't realized you were starving, you and Rey continued on your conversation, being carried away with other topics not relating to the hospital but about your lives and random stories. Although you hadn't known Rey for all that long, she was a close friend to you--along with Finn and Poe. You were thankful for the Resistance hospital, without it, you wouldn't have met them.And you definitely wouldn't have landed on your now mentor (and what you tried convincing yourself to be) then crush."You haven't told me who your mentor is! Who did Leia assign you to? I know it wasn't Ackbar or Hux, definitely not Hux, you would've complained already." She chuckled as you laughed along. "So, who is it?"Lightly gulping as you looked down at your soup, messing with the spoon as you felt the blood rushing to your cheeks, Rey raised a brow. "Y/n...is-is your mentor-"Shooting your head up, you could see a smirk on Rey's face. "Stop right there." You pointed a finger, letting go of your spoon. "Do not bother sharing any remarks!""It's Ren, isn't it?" Crossing her arms as she leaned back in her seat, you sighed. "It is?! Ahah!" She pointed a finger at you as you shoved your face into your hands. "Oh, stars. Ren...Ren is the doctor you're assigned to. The Ren, the Ren you fell on? The Ren your ass nearly broke's di-""Rey..." You warned. "What other Ren would it be?!" You now loudly whispered."I can not believe this..." Taking a sip from her water bottle, she only waved a hand and shook her head. "Actually, I can believe this. This would happen to you. I bet you you're freaking out.""You're not making it any better..." Finishing up your soup, Rey smirked."You're going to have to work with him for who knows how long. Y/n, you're the only girl in his group! The other six are guys! Oh, this is perfect!""Wait, they are?" You questioned as you leaned in, suddenly relieved."Actually, I'm not all that sure...there could be one woman in it now that I think of it and five other men..." She tapped her chin as your shoulders dropped in disappointment. The word competition was floating in your head now, you trying to swat it away. Now wasn't the time to be jealous--you weren't even sure there was a- "I stand corrected."Seeing Rey's eyes looking in a different direction, you followed them. "There is one woman." Looking at the blonde female standing in front of Ren--who was now in the cafeteria--you swallowed.Although they were a good distance away, you could tell there was some flirting. The way she jumped the slightest when she spoke, the twirling of her curled hair around her finger, and the simple fact that she was laughing as Ren smiled. You were envious and you hated it. First day in and you were already having an issue you shouldn't be having. "Lovely...""Now that I remember, Poe did mention that Ren's group had one female who was constantly at his side." She informed as your jaw tightened. "Poe told me she's been crushing on Ren for the longest of time but nothing's been done. It's possibly because it's one sided, so you're in the clear." Rolling your eyes as you kept your focus on them, you hadn't realized you had been staring until Ren turned his head the slightest, eyes meeting your own.Nearly shrieking, you turned back ahead and sunk in your seat. "Please tell me he's not staring...""Oh, he's staring all right..." Rey nodded. "Actually, he's coming this way-""What?!" You nearly shouted."Yup, and blondie doesn't seem the least bit of satisfied that her man is walking away from her.""He is not her man." Quickly placing your trash on the tray as you wanted to just get up and dip. The second you were about to turn to stand up was the second someone's crotch was in your line of vision. Oh no."Ah, so this is where you took your break...you had lunch without me?" Trailing your eyes up his black scrubs, Ren was now looking down at you, a fake pout on his lips."Uh, Rey and I were hungry and we decided to eat..." You spoke, voice nearly faltering. You felt like you were going to choke right there and then. The feeling he gave you was unflattering and you absolutely hated it; it was almost as if you were back in grade school with a stupid crush. "And now we're done..."Looking at your tray, then back up at him, Ren crossed his arms. "I see...it would've been nice to have spent your first lunch with me--your mentor--but, I guess being with a friend is fair enough.""Sorry?" Your brows narrowed the slightest.Bending forward as he laid a hand on the back of your chair and the other flat on the table, your heart skipped a beat as his face was inches away from your own, Rey watching with wide eyes. "No need to apologize, this means you and I will be having dinner together."Falling stiff in your spot, your eyes fluttered the slightest as Kylo winked, standing back up straight and patting the back of your chair. "I'll see you back by the examine rooms in five."Watching him walk away as he stuck his hands into his white coat, you let out a shaky breath. "What...was that?" Nearly forgetting Rey was there, you snapped your head in her direction. "Did he just lower his voice at you? And did he just technically ask you to dinner?""I...?""Y/n, your dreams are coming true! The man you've been crushing on for months is giving you the attention you want!" Rey spoke in awe as you swatted a hand."No, he's just being that way cause he's cocky! He's just too smug and acting like a complete fool. I'm not falling for it." You shook your head as you rolled your eyes, although you had the slightest of a feeling that Rey was right. "Doctor Ren is nothing but a man who's full of himself." With a single nod in assurance, you stood up and went to dump your tray, Rey following shortly behind."Yeah, okay, cause the man doesn't want to fill you." Raising your brows as your eyes widened, you instantly turned around and smacked her arm. "Hey! It's true!""No, it's not!" You pointed your finger, trying to be assertive although you were clearly flustered at the thought of it. After all, you did practically have his dick pressed up against your ass no thanks to your clumsiness. There was no lie in saying that you've imagined--even dreamt about--such erotic things before. What could you say? Doctor Ren was quite the man and he brought out feelings in you you haven't felt in a whole--and possibly never had felt before.He was just so dreamy, to say the least. He also looked very delicious in the sense you'd have him any day. He was almost every good adjective there was in the dictionary. Of course, you could never admit to such things because he was technically your boss, he had a pretty big ego, and you'd be embarrassed.You just hated how much the man turned you on. The constant urge of wanting to touch his hair, to rub your hands down his chest, squeeze his biceps and even kiss him were killing you--and you absolutely hated it.He made your heart race, your stomach turn and your whole body shake. The fact that he was flirting with you made you question as to how your panties weren't wet already. Self control, you have some self control. "I'll see you around, I've got to head back." You spoke over to Rey, about to part ways."Good luck! Maybe Ren will somehow fall on you and-""Goodbye, Rey!" You waved as she snickered, waving back.At least she was quiet about it and didn't mention anything to anyone. A true and loyal friend."Nurse y/n?" Turning around, you looked at the woman sitting behind the counter to the right of you. "Doctor Ren is in examine room four, waiting for you with a patient.Already? "Okay, thank you." Giving her a small smile, you walked off. Not even five minutes and he was already working.Walking up to the door and knocking, Ren called out. "Come in."Pushing past and entering the room, you smiled, allowing the door to shut behind you as you walked over. "Hello, I'm nurse y/n." You greeted with a smile as the teenage boy--around the age of seventeen--sat there and stared at you.Not realizing what he was doing as you were still too worked up on Ren, the man himself narrowed his brows as he watched the patient basically undress you with his eyes. He wasn't having it. A seventeen year old boy couldn't possibly have a woman who was almost ten years older. "Hello..." The boy trailed, staring at your chest, Ren instantly clenching his jaw as he cleared his throat. How had you not notice that?"This is Tyler, he's here because he severely injured his testicles." Trying not to react, Ren handed over the boys file as you cleared your own throat now, Tyler sitting there embarrassed."Oh, well..." Reading the file, you held back any noises. "You rammed your bike into a wall? How?" You questioned, looking over at him as the boys eyes were still on your chest, Ren rolling his own in sheer annoyance."I...I got distracted and wasn't paying attention, and before I knew it, I crashed rather roughly and fell...and the bike handle landed on my balls." He responded, slowly shifting his eyes up at you."I see...well, I'm sure we can help." With a small smile and nod, the boy smiled back.If the boy was expecting you to check him, he was wrong. Ren could tell the look on his face as if he were more than happy to lower his pants for you if you had asked.Still oblivious to it all, you held onto the file as you finished skimming through it before closing it. Tyler was in a trance, his eyes constantly moving around your body as he grinned in satisfaction. It was a shame he had ended up in the hospital for the exact same thing he was doing right now."I'll check them out and see what we can do." Ren spoke up as the boy blinked, quickly turning his head to the doctor."W-what?" He shook his head."She's in training so she can't really do much, I'll be examining you." Ren simply spoke, pulling disposable gloves on as Tyler felt his face heat up."I...she can't do it?" He asked as you shook your head."I know you may feel more comfortable if I were to do it, but doctor Ren must be the one." You pointed your hand. Ren couldn't believe how oblivious you were to the fact that the kid was completely drooling over you. "I'll be right here, though.""The quicker I check them out, the faster you'll get out of here." Ren nodded, the slightest of assertive. You could hear it in his tone, he was never assertive to his patients. Was something up? Did something suddenly upset him? Or was he just not up for dealing with such problem?The latter seemed the most reasonable to you, too bad you didn't know it was jealousy that a seventeen year old boy was checking out the woman he wanted.The entire examination went rather odd, the boy was completely embarrassed, Ren was saying things a man of his level shouldn't have been saying to a patient and you were growing annoyed by the second. It was one thing to poke fun at someone his age, but to a kid a decade or so younger than him? He had hit a new low and you were upset."I'm sorry, Tyler. Ren is having a bad day." You lied as the boy was on the verge of tears, you taking over the situation. "I suggest you not ride your bike for a good month, get someone to drive you and be careful with what you do." You nodded, handing him a paper. "If things get worse, I'll make sure someone else checks you up."Hearing your words as he now glared, Ren stood there with crossed arms as you walked the boy out. "Again, I'm sorry.""It's okay, nurse y/n. You're very kind and I appreciate it." He lightly smiled, giving you a hug and catching you off guard, Ren scoffing as he screwed his eyes back. Were you really that dumb to fall for the boys tricks? It wasn't Ren's fault the boy was small."Take care." You waved as the boy left your sight, you instantly turning around to face Ren. "What the hell is wrong with you?! You don't go around making fun of a kids penis size!" You fired, pointing your finger at him."I'm not the one who was oblivious to the fact that the pervert kept staring at your chest!" He exclaimed. "When you had bent over for a moment, his eyes were on your cleavage!"Shaking your head, you threw your hands up. "Really? Is that what you're going to say?! Not that you're sorry?! That boys self esteem must be in hell!""Good! No one told him to check out a woman! That's the exact reason why he was here!" Ren raised his voice as the two of you grew closer the louder your voices went."How would you know that?!""He told me himself! The second you walked in was basically round two with another woman! He was undressing you with his eyes, y/n." He now spoke through gritted teeth."Why do you care? Why are you so worked up about it? Last time I checked, I should be! And I'm not because teenage boys are stupid and I'm well aware!" Standing inches apart from one another as Ren towered in front of you, all you could hear was either of you breathing."Because he lacks respect!""Oh, like you have respect?" You crossed your arms. "You're just as bad!""I'm not a pervert!" Ren pointed to himself."But you're an egotistical asshole!" You shouted as Ren was now glaring at you. "Oh, big whoop, you're a doctor! Plenty of people are! No need to be cocky about it!""I am no egotistical asshole." Ren spoke as his jaw tightened. "You should be thankful I'm being such way! It means I have common sense and respect for you!""Seriously?! With the way you've treated me before? You've got the audacity to say that?!" Yelling at each other back and forth, you were amazed that no one had come in to complain or check in."Yes, I have the audacity because no one is allowed to look at you that way! No one should be undressing you with their eyes unless it's me!" Not truly realizing what he had said, you smacked his cheek, the burning sensation tingling at the skin as Ren stood there and stared at you."I don't need your pi-" Before you could finish, Rens soft lips were pressed up against your own, moving along and trying to get something out of you as his hand held onto the back of your head, the other on your lower back.Not noticing that he was, in fact, kissing you from how upset you were, your eyes instantly widened as you felt his tongue glide along your bottom lip before he bit it. Blinking as your eyes stared at his now closed ones, your eyes shut as you kissed back with the same force, just as hungry and just as rough. Holding onto his face, the two of you kissed one another with such passion and desire, to the point Kylo moved you to sit on the counter, nearly knocking everything over as his hands slid under the top of of your scrubs.Resting his hands on the bare skin of your waist, they slid up and over your bra strap. "He can't have you like I can..." He breathed."I would hope not, I don't do young." Continuously kissing him as your hands slid down his arms, you grabbed onto the waist band of his scrubs pants and tugged him even closer, your legs spreading apart even more. You were practically on the edge of the counter to the point you could feel his length against you, causing your lips to part the slightest as if wanting to gasp.The urge to feel him was itching at your skin, you so badly wanted to rub yourself against him, to get a good feel even if it was a tease. He was so hard for you, you could only image how it'd feel in you.Moving your hands onto his coat, you pushed it down to the point Kylo had to remove his hands from you to let it slide off. Placing his hands back under your shirt, your own hold onto his arms, clutching onto his biceps as you smiled into the kiss. He was well built and you could only imagine how he looked without the top.Moving his hands under your bra and grabbing onto your breasts, his thumbs brushed against your nipples as you moaned against his lips. Shifting yourself even more, you lowered your arms and pulled him closer by the waist, feeling him even more against you. "Ren..." You muttered as you parted to take in a breath, eyes still shut as his hands massaged your chest.Smirking at the sound of you nearly begging, one hand slid out from under, getting a hold of your jaw as he tilted your head to a side, slowly peppering your neck with gentle kisses. "Be patient."Feeling your heart thud in your chest as your lips parted to let out a moan, your hand slid into his hair as the other wrapped around the wrist of his hand holding your face. You never thought a moment like this would happen with him in an examine room--let alone, ever. Yet, here he was, finding your sensitive spot and gently biting at the skin, leaving a mark on your neck and a few on your collar bone as he had shifted your shirt.Although you were in an examine room with the door unlocked, the thought of you being caught didn't seem to come to mind. In all honesty, all you could think about was him and him satisfying you--which he was very much achieving.At this point, you couldn't get enough of the feeling of how hard he was against you; you shifting your hips the slightest and letting out a shaky breath as Ren lightly moaned against your skin. "Come on..." You whispered, not wanting to wait any longer. It was enough you've been waiting for so long to even have him feel the same way."Not yet..." He muttered against your neck as your brows narrowed. You didn't want to wait any longer, you were growing desperate."Ren..." Continuously moving your hips as he took in a deep breath, hand moving from under your bra and onto the counter, his grip tightened. "Please." You lowly uttered, moving a hand onto his lower back and pressing him against you."N-n-" Lowering his head as he bit back the urge to groan out loud, both hands now clutched onto the counter as your legs had wrapped around his waist."Kylo..." You breathed, the sound of his first name making his knuckles turn white as he wanted to just rip your pants and panties off and fuck you then and there. But he didn't want to seem desperate even if this was what he wanted for a very long time, possibly since when you fell on him.Succumbing to his urges, Kylo let go of the counter and grabbed onto the waist band of your pants, moving them down as your legs unwrapped from him, kicking off your shoes as the pants went down with them. Going for your underwear, he swiftly stripped them off of you and tossed them to a side, haphazardly lowering his own pants and briefs down.Gabbing onto your thighs as your hands lied on his back, Kylo wasted no time. As much as he imagined his first time with you to at least be on the cot, doing it on the counter seemed quite thrilling.Sliding himself in you as a gasp built up in your throat, your eyes fluttered closed as he began thrusting. Your jaw hung loose as if you were about to moan, but nothing sounded, you were too stunned.Holding tightly onto his back as you felt his shoulder blades shift since his hands moved from your thighs, down your legs to wrap the around his waist once again.Letting out small cries with every buck, your brows scrunched up, nails digging into his skin as Kylos jaw tightened. As lovely as your moans were, his lips couldn't seem to be away from your own for too long. Holding onto the back of your head as his fingers intertwined with your hair, his lips collided with your own once again.Heavy panting was heard every chance you could breathe from the sloppy kiss. It was all over the place, Kylos tongue moving along your own as your chest along with his own began to heave. Lying his right hand on your thigh as he glided it along, the tips of fingers brushing against the soft skin caused chills to run down his spine. Aside from kissing you, the feeling of his hands coming into contact with your own skin made his insides want to burst.He felt so hot, his whole body burning up from the moment. It all felt so good, it had been so long since he had last had a moment like this--but nothing compared to having it with you. The last time he had fucked somebody was in a supply closet in the hospital and it was miserable with having to constantly keep the young woman's mouth shut.But you, your moans were music to his ears and he loved listening to it. Every now and then, as one would build up in your throat, you'd let it out and Kylo would grin. It was an absolute beautiful sound and he wanted to hear more.Too bad he was already reaching his peak and was about to climax, and you weren't too far behind. After all, you've been worked up since earlier.Getting his last thrusts in as he knew he couldn't hold back any longer, he slightly parted from the kiss as he let out a lengthy moan, lips hovering against your own before his forehead rested on your shoulder. Taking in unsteady breaths, your hands fell from his back as his own slipped from your hair. "Next time...the cot." He pointed without lifting his head, your eyes slowly opening as your cheeks began to heat up.So he wanted more? A small part of you thought this was a one time deal...but it wasn't?Nodding your head, Kylo pressed a kiss against your neck before removing himself, your legs falling as he pulled his underwear and pants back on as you tried catching your breath. You couldn't believe that had happened, but with the satisfaction left behind and the breathlessness, you knew it was all very real.Bending down to grab your underwear, Kylo walked over and slid them back on you, you watching him as you simply blinked. You could've sworn he would've left you the second he put his pants back and let you do your thing. Yet, here he was, slipping it back on as you held on his shoulders to let him fully place them.Keeping quiet as you were still trying to steady out your breathing, Kylo had done the same with your scrubs pants, you holding on once more, except this time, Kylo was looking at you. Gazing at one another, you took in a quiet, deep breath as your heart fluttered. "Thank you..."Looking you in the eye as you had broke the silence, thanking him for practically redressing you, he smirked. "Can't have anyone seeing the nurse half dressed, now, can we? What would people think of you?" Seeing him slowly lean in, your breathing began to quicken just as you thought it had gone back to normal."I-" Being cut off by his lips, your heart dropped. You couldn't grasp onto the concept that the man you crushed on so badly had shared such intimate moment with you and was now sweetly kissing you. Kissing him back as Kylo held onto your cheeks, the man grinned.Leaning back and moving his thumb to rest on your bottom lip, gently brushing it against the skin as he leaned in to whisper in your ear. "I'll be looking forward to dinner." Moving back, he slowly moved his hands away before backing up, picking up his coat and pulling it back on before walking to the door. Looking over his shoulder as he held onto the door knob, he spoke, "But, for now, we have more patients to see."
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
It was clear to Ren that he was the reasoning behind the sudden silence that took over you. The entire time you stood by as he took in a patient, you were quietly watching. Although it must've seemed like you were being a good observer, you were actually too busy caught in a daze, thinking about how good the man made you feel.Each and every time you thought you were going to focus, your mind went elsewhere. The sensation surged throughout your body again and again as if you were reliving the moment. You never thought you'd get so far so quickly with a man you were crushing on--let alone, a man who felt the same way.Standing there as Ren had taken in his last patient, a young pregnant woman around her mid twenties, you simply stood to a side as your mind echoed out Ren's voice. All you could remember was the fact that the woman was there because of a small injury to her wrist, after that, everything blocked out. Yet again, you were caught in a trance.Although it was quick and rather messy, no one had ever made you feel as good as Ren had. Not even on a bed. Maybe it was the fact that the tension was already there, along with the craving and desire for one another. That was a possible, major, factor to why it was so remarkable.Also, the fact that he was a very breathtaking man who carried himself so highly and almost seemed as if he wasn't so easy to get. Yet, he wanted you."Thank you, doctor." The woman spoke as Ren helped her stand up."Don't move your wrist too much, keep that on and you should be good." He nodded as he walked her out, giving her a smile before she left.Still standing there thinking as you held the woman's file, it was instantly taken from your grip as your head instantly snapped up. "You shouldn't think about it so much.""What?" You spoke."If you think about it, people will notice something's going on. I don't think you want people to be curious as to why you're so out of it." Removing a pen from the pocket of his coat, Ren signed away on the file before closing it."Right..." You breathed, scratching the side of your head as you aimed for the door."But, you can think about it all you want when you're alone." Stopping in your tracks as your face began to heat up, hand getting a hold of the doors handle but not moving, you could feel Ren lurking nearby. "Let your mind run wild." His voice lowered as you felt chills bolt throughout your body."You'd like that, wouldn't you?" You asked, speaking over your shoulder as he came into your view, a smirk on his lips as he leaned a hand against the door while standing behind you."There's a lot of things I would like from you, actually. Aside from knowing how wild I drive you or your sexual fantasies, I also would like to know more...decent things about you, dear y/n." Looking down at you as if you were something he could so easily devour, you gulped."Like, what?" You questioned, voice nearly cracking."Oh, you know, your hobbies...what your favorite movies and shows are, your favorite food..." He listed with his fingers before waving his hand. "You know, elementary kind of things. Something kids would ask one another." Ren smiled as you took in a small breath."Over dinner we can discuss this, since you're so persistent on eating together." You spoke as Ren's smile grew."Dinner, how could I forget?" Giving you a toothy grin, your heart skipped a beat as you knew that had no good connotations. "Why don't we eat now? It's already ten till nine?" He spoke, looking at his watch."Uh...okay." Swallowing quietly, Ren went to open the door for you as your hand had still been on the handle, his eyes locked on your own before you slid your hand away. It was almost as if he were trying everything in his power to get you to slam him up against a wall and make out with him.Casually looking away, you walked in front of him as the man watched you with a smirk before following. "Do you still want to work with Luke?" He questioned as your eyes widened. How had he known?"Why would you ask that?" You wondered, walking on his he was beside you, hands in the pockets of his coat. "I mean, he was a great mentor before-""But I'm far better." He spoke with high regards. "I mean...first day in and I'm sure you've made some memorable moments." Looking over at him, he simply grinned."You mean when we-" Instantly covering your mouth, Ren stopped you in your tracks."As much as it's thrilling to have people know I had you in such way, no one can possibly know. If they do, they'll take you off of my team-"Lowering his hand, you narrowed your eyes. "Oh, wouldn't you hate that? Not being able to have a fu-""No, I would hate it because I won't be able to see you." He truthfully spoke as your heart instantly skipped a beat, eyes growing in size. "But, that as well. You are quite lovely."Rolling your eyes, you shook your head. "Fine, my most memorable moment today was the fact that you embarrassed a seventeen year old boy and saying his penis was the size of a baby carrot." Placing your hands on your hips, Ren sighed. "What a memorable moment, doctor Ren.""Fine." He sighed. "Just say it."Smirking, you walked closer to him. "My most memorable moment was the fact that you came before me even though I've been wanting you for a very long time." You spoke in all honesty, Ren's eyes widening.Patting his chest, you continued your walk over to the cafeteria, Ren watching you in awe. He never expected you to say something like that. It was kind of...hot? No, it definitely was with how turned on he felt. He could almost pull you into a closet and go for round two. "I guess I was a little too excited." He admitted, making his way to your side as you looked up at him."Is that so?" You questioned, seeing the cafeteria coming up to view."Of course." He grinned. "I've been fantasizing about the moment ever since you first fell on me." Winking at you, Ren walked off as you fell still. Was he trying to one-up you, or did he truly mean what he said? If so, your heart was now lodged up in your throat, blocking you from breathing.Snapping out of it as you swallowed, you quickly followed behind. Never did you think that the person who'd be mentoring you would be the one you'd be sleeping with and--possibly--having a love affair with. At least, you assumed, you didn't want to get too ahead of yourself. What if he wanted you just for the sex? As attractive as he was, you weren't up for that."I don't think I've ever had a proper conversation with you, y/n." At the sound of your name, you felt chills move along your body."That's because you always had something snarky to say, Kylo." You raised a brow as the two of you grabbed the food you wanted and placed it on the trays. "So, how would you expect us to have a conversation when you couldn't even handle one?""Touché..." He grinned, turning around and picking up his tray to pay for his food."But, now that you're being civil...we can have a proper conversation." You smiled as you followed behind him with your own tray."Are you two paying together or separately?" The cashier asked."Together.""Separately."The two of you spoke in sync, you looking up at him and narrowing your brows. "Together, I'll be paying for our food." Kylo spoke as he looked at you, though aiming his words towards the cashier. "We're on a date.""Alright...what a nice...date." Taking Kylo's money, you looked at the cashier, then back over at Kylo and shook your head."A date?" You asked as the two of you walked on, finding a table. "Really? I don't remember you asking.""I did, technically, when I said we were having dinner. So, consider this a date." He simply grinned, taking a seat as you sat diagonal to him."I'm not one to be picky about dates, I appreciate anything, but...at the hospitals cafeteria?" You raised a brow."At least you're getting the date." Kylo said before he dug into his food, your eyes instantly narrowing.Spending most of the dinner talking and getting to know one another better, learning more about Kylo and seeing a side of him you didn't expect, you had found yourself laughing as he had smiled. He had a sense of humor, although it could be but dry and dark, it still worked."So, how'd you get the job?" You asked, drinking your water."Actually, I had worked for another hospital, First Order. But, they merged with the Resistance and took some of us in...like Hux, Phasma and myself." He spoke, finishing up his food."Oh, why's that?" You curiously asked."It went bankrupt." Kylo simply shrugged as you raised your brows."Wow, at least the Resistance took you in." Continuing to eat your food, Kylo leaned back in his seat and eyed you."No thanks to my mother. She runs this hospital." Growing wide eyed, your jaw dropped."Your mother is Leia Organa?" You questioned in awe as Kylo nodded. "No way...you're nothing like her!""I'm more like my father..." He sighed as you nodded."And what does your father do?" Looking at him as he kept his focus on his hands that were lying on his thighs, your brows furrowed the slightest. Did he not have a good relationship with his parents? Let alone, father?"Air force." He simply stated as you let out a small 'ah'. "But, enough about me, what about yours?" Kylo quickly lightened up, as if he didn't want to stay on the topic for too long."My parents?" Hearing him hum, you went on. "Oh, well, my mother's a pediatrician and my father works alongside her.""So saving lives and taking care of others runs through the family?" Kylo asked with a small laugh as you smiled."Basically...it isn't like I was forced into this life, I actually wanted to be a nurse." You spoke, focusing on your food as Kylo watched you.Just about to speak up, Kylo was interrupted. "Doctor Ren, I need you." Lifting your head up, you looked over and recognized the woman from earlier. Turning your attention back down to your food, you rolled your eyes--Kylo noticing this."For what, exactly? I'm not the on call doctor for the-""A patient in room seven, the on call doctor can't make it on time due to a family emergency." The woman quickly responded, cutting Kylo off as you sighed."Kylo, go." You looked at him, the man shifting his eyes to you and dropping his shoulders.Standing up, he pointed his finger at you. "I'll be right back." Nodding your head, he walked on, you looking over your shoulder and seeing the woman grab his arm.Groaning, you placed your elbow on the table, leaning your chin in the palm of your hand, lousily finishing your food.. . .Sitting there for what felt like hours, you looked at your watch, seeing that thirty minutes had passed by. Sighing, you stood up and tossed your things along with Kylo's, sticking your hands into the pockets of the scrubs pants and exiting the cafeteria.It couldn't have possibly taken the two that long to see a patient. You didn't want to be paranoid, but your doubt was getting the best of you and all you could think about was the fact that Kylo had been using you."You could have done that yourself, Allison." Kylo spoke over to the blonde, tossing the disposable gloves and exiting the room. "Any certified nurse could have done that.""I was being cautious, I didn't want to get in trouble..." She batted her eyelashes as Kylo rolled his eyes."No, you're just being desperate." He truthfully spoke, walking past her as her eyes narrowed."Oh, but that new nurse isn't?!" She nearly exclaimed, Kylo clenching his jaw."That new nurse is part of our team now." He spoke over his shoulder."Like we need any more people? Give her to Hux!""No!" He shouted as he turned around, the woman freezing as the people passing by looked over. "You're too hooked up on me, we're done, get over it!""Why?! So you can fuck someone new?!""Allison." He spoke through gritted teeth."No! You're just going to move on like that?!" She threw her hands up."Allison, we had nothing. Nothing at all! It was nothing but lust!" He spoke truthfully."And what about her?! What about the nurse?! I bet you she's just the next slut willingly opening her legs for you!""Don't you dare call her a slut!" He shouted in her face."How is she any different, huh?! What makes her so special?! Why does she get the attention?!""Because I love her!"Turning a corner and stopping in your tracks, your eyes widened. "You love a girl...you just met? Than a girl you've known for years?!" Allison stomped."I've loved her since her clumsy self fell on me. I love her because she treats me like a person than a sex thing. Unlike you." Standing there and watching the two, Allison looked over at you, Kylo's eyes only following and turning around."I...sorry..." You spoke, slowly backing up. "I, uh...I'll go-" Before you could even walk away, Kylo rushed over to you and tugged you to him.Narrowing her brows as she watched, Allison only gasped as Kylo pulled you into a kiss, your eyes widening as they only shifted over to the blonde, seeing her expression. Smiling into it, you kissed back as you closed your eyes for the small moment, Kylo leaning back and looking at you for a moment before letting you go and turning to Allison. "I hope you don't mind, I'd like to finish my date that you rudely interrupted."Grabbing your hand and walking away with you, you looked at the woman as she grunted in annoyance, only for you to look at Kylo. "What...what was that about?"Looking over at you, Kylo raised a brow. "Really?"Turning your head away, you took in a deep breath, letting go of his hand as Kylo narrowed his eyebrows. "I waited for you to get back to the cafeteria but you never did..." You spoke, stopping in your tracks as you looked up at him. "A good thirty minutes...I decided to leave thinking you wouldn't come back.""Trust me, I wanted to. The second I realized Allison asked me for help on something she could've done, I wanted to leave..." Kylo said, looking down at you.Lightly smiling, you lied a hand on his arm. "I walked in at the right time to hear what you had to say. Kylo, if you truly mean it, then...I want it to be real. I don't know how your relationship was with Allison, but I want us to have something true.""Yes, yes. Of course." He nodded, eagerly."That easily?" Your brows raised."There was nothing but lust with Allison and I, but with you, that isn't the case. Although, yes, the first day we truly spend time together things happened...but that's because I couldn't wait and, and you were willing-""It's okay, I get it." You laughed. "As much as I'd hate to ruin the moment, it's half past ten and I wanna head home." Lowering your hand, Kylo only took a step forward."Come to my place?" He asked, holding your upper arm. "If you're not exhausted from the day you've had.""Uh...yeah, but I, shouldn't I change?" Seeing him shake his head, you nodded. "Okay, well-""I can take you?""What about my car?""We can get it tomorrow." He smirked."Kylo..." Rolling your eyes, he gave you a begging look. "Fine." Wasting no time, he pulled you with him and rushed along the hall."I-I need to get my things from my locker!" You called, Kylo groaning. "Jeez, why are you so excited? I'm sure you've taken other women to your place.""Not women who plan on actually hanging out." He spoke over to you as you went over to where you kept your things."Well, that's the women you choose." You shrugged as Kylo rolled his eyes."At least I found you." He muttered as you smiled, grabbing your purse and walking back over to him."You've been gifted by the stars above by my presence." You winked."And your body." He teased with a smirk, your smile dropping as you walked on without him. "I was kidding! Hey, come on! I love your body!""You love the feeling, you've never seen my body so you can't say you love it." You pointed a finger as Kylo rushed over to you, wrapping an arm over your shoulders."I'm sure I soon will." Shaking your head, you grinned.. . .Entering his condo, you placed your purse to a side on a table, eyeing his place. "So much room for one person.""I am a doctor." He spoke, shutting the door and placing his keys beside your purse. "I wasn't gonna live in a shoebox sized apartment.""Hey! Shoeboxes aren't so bad..." You defended."You live in one, don't you?" He raised a brow as you nodded. "That's okay, everyone has to start somewhere." Moving over to you and lying his fingers on the back of your neck, you looked up at him. "But, if it ever feels like the walls are caving in...you can always stay here." He spoke as he slowly leaned in."We'll see about that." Closing the gap, your hands moved onto his torso, sliding up and lying on his shoulders as the two of you kissed.It was quite passionate, the way Kylo moved his lips rather slowly against your own as if he wanted to savor the taste. The way his tongue glided against your bottom lip before bitting it. Even by the way his tongue pressed against your own. It was different than the one you shared before, but you didn't mind, it still made your heart race.Slowly backing you up against a wall, Kylo picked you up as his lips moved to your neck, your eyes fluttering close as you moaned. "Mmm...are we actually...going to make it to the bed?""If that's what you want, I'm fine right here." He spoke against your skin, deciding to leave marks along--you knew you'd have to wear a turtle neck under your scrubs for the rest of the week."Mmm..." Moaning again as Kylo sucked and nipped on sensitive areas of your skin, he gently began to grind his hips against your own as your mouth fell open. "Are you already h-hard?" You breathed."I guess you have that affect on me." He grinned, holding tightly onto the back of your thighs before grabbing onto the top of your scrubs and pulling it off."You must've wanted this...for a while now." Grunting the slightest as Kylo had bucked his hips, he nodded."I would be lying if I said I didn't think about it that same day you fell on me." Opening your eyes, you looked at him. "What? You're beautiful." Blushing, you pulled him back into the kiss, Kylo moving you from the wall, over to his room and onto his dresser, nearly knocking stuff off for you to sit."You're not so bad yourself." Pushing away from the kiss, you grabbed onto the bottom of his scrub top and removed it, staring at his body as your hands lied there. "Shit.""I know." He smirked, your hands dragging themselves the feel his torso."You're so...huge?" Furrowing your brows, Kylo grinned."Oh, I am." Grabbing your wrist, he pressed your hand against himself, feeling the bulge in your palm as you nearly gasped. "I'm pretty huge.""I-I know, after having you in me..." You breathed. "But..." Moving your wrist so your palm would brush against him, your breath hitched as Kylo's eyes fluttered. "But, damn..." Grabbing onto him, not so tight but enough for him to enjoy it, a small whimper left Kylo's lips.Smiling at the sound, you decided to move your hand on your own, Kylo's grip tightening on your wrist as you continued to palm him through his pants. "Fuck..." He breathed, eyes falling close although he tried to fight it. "Fuck, that feels so good."Practically massaging him as your hand moved against the fabric, Kylo lied his free hand against the dresser as he tried catching his breath. "Does it?" You narrowed your brows, using your free hand to tug on the elastic of the waist band as your other hand slid in and rubbed against his underwear, feeling him even better. "How about now?""Y/n...pl-please..." Hearing him beg made your heart flutter as you bit your bottom lip. "Stars...why can't you touch me instead of me doing it to myself?""Because I think we both know what I have is better," You said as your free hand had lied on the back of his neck and pulled him closer so you could whisper in his ear. "Far...better." Leaving a kiss under his ear as your hand continued, Kylo grabbed onto your face and pulled you back into another kiss--this time a sloppy one.Unable to contain himself, he began moving his hips against your hand, you only pushing away from the kiss. "No hip movements.""Y/n!" He whined as you shook your head."No, I get to have fun now." Pulling back into the kiss, your hand went on with its movements as Kylo's insides felt like pure mush. His heart race already at a pace he was sure to get cardiac arrest from. "You're so big, it's unbelievable.""I'm far better than your exes.""Far better." You agreed. "So much better."Panting, Kylo couldn't seem to take it anymore, pulling your hand out and picking you up from your spot and pushing you down against his bed. "I need to feel you, I can't take this." He panted, kicking off his shoes, tugging down both his underwear and pants.Looking at him, your eyes lowered and followed his happy trail, only to smile as your heart raced. "Wow...you really are-"Tugging your pants off, Kylo tried so hard to calm himself down, the anticipation getting to him as his blood rushed. "I'm the one who's always doing the touching...it feels so fucking good when things change." Nearly ripping your underwear off of you, Kylo grabbed your thighs and pulled you closer to him. "So fucking good..." He said while he looked down at your partially naked body as you had only been in your bra.His mind was all over the place, he wanted to do so much to your body; he wanted to kiss it, but he also wanted to leave more marks. He wanted to touch you, outside and in. He wanted to feel every bit of you, he wanted to make you moan his name loud enough that the sound would be imprinted in his mind. He had the desire to touch you like you had touched him, to make you feel good.He wanted so much but couldn't get it all at once--and it was driving his body mad. Kylo was so attracted to you that it made him sick to the stomach. All he wanted was you and only you. Every part of you. And, soon enough, he would.Clutching onto the sheets as he slid himself into you, your mouth fell open as Kylo let out a groan. "You're so fucking perfect for me. You're like a damn puzzle piece."Taking in deep breaths, your grip tightened as Kylo began to thrust, pace starting off slow only to pick up with every shift in his hips. Moaning as your eyes fell closed, Kylo thrusted in and out, holding himself back. He wanted to ram into you, to make you completely sore the next morning that you couldn't walk. He wanted to fuck you good that you couldn't possibly remember any of your past lovers.He knew he had been feeling lustful, but amongst that there was love. He wasn't just screwing you to screw you. No, he was making love to you, he was giving your body what it deserved. He was doing what he had been dreaming of for so long. He was going to love you like no one else could.Moving his hands to your bra, he held onto your breasts and brushed his thumbs. "This has to go."Nodding your head in agreement, eyes still shut from the pleasure you had been feeling, his hands slid under your back and unhooked the bra. He was careful to remove it, the anticipation was building up in him that his body was shaking. It was nothing but a gift to see your whole body the way he was now. No one could ever see it like he had, not by the way he admired you.Getting a hold of the straps, he took his time to lower them. Letting go of the sheets to allow Kylo to remove the bra, he slowly unveiled your chest, freeing them from their confines. Sliding the bra off of your arms and tossing it to a side, Kylo looked down at you.Taking in a deep breath as his hands kept him balance, he gazed at your chest, only to lower his head as he began to leave kisses and more marks, teasing you with his teeth and his tongue as he had decided to grab one of your breasts and giving it a squeeze."Kylo..." You moaned, loving the feeling of it all, the way his hand massaged your breast, practically kneading it as his thumb gently brushing the skin. Your whole body felt like it was about to explode, the heat pooling up within as you grew more and more hot. "Kylo...""I want you to take control." He spoke, you forcing your eyes open and looking up at him. "I want you to do what you want to me."Blinking as your chest heaved, you slowly nodded, Kylo switching positions with you as you now topped. You were unsure of what to do at first your thrusting being slow. You wanted to feel him, all of him, so you went as slow as you could. Hands lying against his chest as your head fell back. It was pure ecstasy and the sight of you like this made it all the better for Kylo."You look beautiful." He spoke, watching you moan and rock your hips. "And you feel so good." Gliding his hands along your bare thighs, up your hips and waist, clutching onto your breasts, your own hands held onto his own as you picked up the pace."Kylo...you feel good." Moving his hands onto your lower back, your own lied beside his head. Lowering yourself, you whispered in his ear. "I've dreamt of this for so long..." Biting his earlobe, you picked up the speed even more as Kylo's eyes were now the ones closed, clutching onto your ass as you kept yourself propped up.Moving your hair to a side as you continued on with your movements, you watched as Kylo's face scrunched up. "Babe...I don't know how long-""Shh...It's okay." Moving a hand on his cheek, you kissed him. "Do what you have to do."Forcing his eyes open to look at you, his heart flew all over the place, the sight of you smiling down at him made him even more weak.Moving a hand onto your jaw, his thumb brushed against your bottom lip before slipping into your mouth, you sucking on as Kylo lightly gasped. Shutting his eyes as he let out staggered breaths, he couldn't hold it in any longer. He had found his breaking point. "Oh, babe, I think I'm gonna cu-" Cutting himself off, his breath hitched as a lengthy moan left his mouth, the man nearly spilling inside of you as you had slowed your pace.Pressing a kiss against his lips as you let out a moan in relief, you slid off of him and kept your lips attached to his, Kylo slowly kissing you back. "I'm so glad I let you take charge." He spoke against your lips. "You're far better than I expected.""Like I said..." Kissing him, you then leaned back. "I've dreamt of this for a long time.""I wish we could've done this sooner, who knows how many things we would've done by now." He spoke as you rolled your eyes. "Your body was made for mine."Grinning, you kissed him again. "Glad it isn't that blonde ones." You snickered, Kylo pushing you down so he could cuddle you. Pulling you to his chest, wrapping an arm around you as his other draped over your hips. One hand in your hair as the other dangling."She wasn't good enough.""And I'm too good for you." You teased, Kylo rolling his eyes."You are." He admitted. "After this, I feel lucky to have you."Smiling, you kissed his chest. "Happy to see that things are working out.""So am I." Grabbing your ass as you slightly jumped, Kylo grinned. "So am I...". . .Stretching your arm out, you frowned, eyes opening and not seeing a single sign of Kylo. Sitting up and holding the sheets against you, you looked around, brows furrowing as you couldn't find him. "Kylo?" You called out."Coming!" He yelled back, you sitting there, rubbing your eyes as Kylo walked in, smiling at the sight of you sitting there, sheet against your chest as your hair was slightly messy. "I wish I stayed in bed to see how you looked but I had to get out."Looking up, you pouted. "You're in your scrubs...why? I thought it was like mine at noon...""I have to attend a meeting, it'll be for an hour but I promise I'll come back." Moving around and reaching into a drawer, he walked over to you. "Here, it'll be like a dress on you.""Well, when you get back I want to go home, I need to shower." You pointed, pulling the shirt over your head and standing up from your spot, grabbing your underwear and pulling it back on."Of course, I will." Watching you slide them back on, he eyed you in his shirt and felt his heart pool up at his feet. "You look so good in my shirt."Turning around, you winked. "I can only imagine how I'd look in your dress shirts.""One day, one day we'll see." He nodded, eyeing your figure. "For now, these'll do." Grabbing your hands as he gazed at you dressed in his shirt, you blushed the slightest. "I made breakfast and took out a new toothbrush for you and left it on the bathroom sink." Kissing the side of your head, you smiled at him."Okay.""I promise I'll try and be quick, okay? It's only half eight so we have a bit before our shifts start." Letting go of your hands as he walked off, you nodded. "Enjoy your food." Smacking your ass, you shifted the slightest, turning and watching him walk off.Aiming towards his kitchen, you saw the plate lied out with a bunch of breakfast items, pancakes stacked on a separate one as he drew a heart with the whipped cream. "He's too cute..." Digging in, you found yourself eyeing his home all over again.Maybe this will be your place. Maybe one day you'd move in and live with him.And maybe one day he'll call you forever his.But, for now, you were going to enjoy what you had. After all, this was only the beginning. You just couldn't wait for what else there was in store for you and Kylo. He was, in fact, the man you were now growing to love.
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10610115
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Of Glass Shards and
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{
"Archive Warning": "Graphic Depictions Of Violence",
"Category": "M/M",
"Characters": "Stiles Stilinski, Derek Hale, Scott McCall, Lydia Martin, Sheriff Stilinski, Melissa McCall",
"Fandom": "Teen Wolf (TV)",
"Language": "English",
"Rating": "Teen And Up Audiences",
"author": "by StilinskiDreams",
"chapters": "5/5",
"completed": "2017-04-14",
"published": "2017-04-12T00:00:00",
"words": "4,809",
"Additional Tags": "Hurt/Comfort, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Hurt Stiles, Hurt Derek, Protective Derek, Protective Scott, Banshee Lydia Martin, Worried Derek, worried everyone tbh, Car Accidents, Stiles-centric, Derek-centric, Romance, Angst, Pain, so much pain, BAMF Stiles, i love these characters you guys",
"Relationship": null,
"Character": null,
"Relationships": "Derek Hale/Stiles Stilinski, Scott McCall & Stiles Stilinski, Lydia Martin & Stiles Stilinski, Sheriff Stilinski & Stiles Stilinski, Derek Hale & Scott McCall, Lydia Martin & Scott McCall, Scott McCall & Sheriff Stilinski, Lydia Martin & Sheriff Stilinski, Melissa McCall & Stiles Stilinski",
"Series": "Stiles Just Can't Stay Out of Trouble",
"Collections": null,
"Fandoms": null,
"Archive Warnings": null,
"Categories": null,
"Bookmarks": null,
"Chapters": null,
"Comments": null,
"Completed": null,
"Hits": null,
"Kudos": null,
"Published": null,
"Words": null,
"Updated": null
}
|
“I still can’t understand why you refuse to get rid of this jeep.” Derek groaned as he was jostled in the passenger seat when Stiles ran over yet another pothole on the quiet, back-country road. Stiles smirked, hands resting lazily on the top of the steering wheel. “This jeep has been a loyal and faithful companion. Respect the jeep.” Derek rolled his eyes. “How many accidents have happened it this jeep? It’s bad luck. It’s cursed or something.”“Hey, watch it. If you hate it so much you can walk the rest of the way home.” Stiles laughed as Derek playfully punched him on the shoulder. “Hey- you can’t assault the driver! That’s dangerous!” “Even if the driver deserves it?” Derek grinned at Stiles’ exaggerated expression of protest.“I literally just made you dinner. I set the table and everything. I lit candles, Derek. CANDLES. Now I’m driving you home. I’m pretty sure that makes me boyfriend number one.”“Fair enough.” Derek sat silently for a bit, smiling and relishing the moment. He was beyond grateful that they were still able to have moments like this. He couldn’t take it for granted. It’d been months since Stiles had been released from the hospital, but Derek still often caught himself sneaking glances to make sure that he wasn’t hurt in any way. He was pretty sure that Stiles noticed the glances too, but he didn't say anything. They didn’t talk about the kidnapping much, except during the panic attacks. The attacks usually hit in the middle of the night. Derek had started the habit of keeping his phone on full volume right next to his bed just in case. Usually Derek could talk Stiles through it on the phone until he calmed down, but if it was especially bad he would run over. Stiles apologized every time, over and over. Derek tried to get it into his head that he absolutely wanted to help and definitely did NOT want Stiles to stop “burdening” him with it. He just wanted Stiles to finally have some peace. Most of the time he was great. Bubbly, energetic… classic Stiles. When the anxiety hit, though, it hit hard. Derek had come to memorize the slight change in breathing and subtle look of impending terror in Stiles beautiful amber eyes when panic was about to strike. “What are you thinking about?” Stiles’ bright voice shook Derek out of his thoughts. “What?”“You have a dreamy look on your face.”“Maybe I just have a dreamy face!” “No, that's not it.” Derek laughed and studied Stiles for a moment before finally responding. “You have really pretty eyes.” Stiles made a noise that was somewhere between a snort and a giggle. “Thanks! I was lying before. You actually do have a dreamy face.” Derek chuckled before Stiles continued, “You know, when I first met you, I wouldn't have pegged you for the romantic softie type.”“That's because we didn't like each other,” Derek stated bluntly, absently playing with Stiles’ hair as if to emphasize the irony. “Good point. Still, you aren't like this with other people.” Stiles gazed at Derek pointedly.Derek leaned in to kiss Stiles on the cheek. “You're not other people.” Stiles was at a loss for how to respond. He gazed down the dim, narrow road for a while, fidgeting and looking slightly uncomfortable.“I feel like I need to insult you now so that the balance is restored to the universe.” Derek laughed. “Come on, you can't insult someone with a face like this.”“Oh my god… enough about the face!” Stiles sighed dramatically. Derek just grinned. Stiles expression suddenly became more serious. “Listen, Derek-”
He cut himself off with a sudden, violent swerve in an attempt avoid the truck shooting out from an intersecting road to their left. They each saw it coming a second too late, and Derek barely had time to register the overwhelming impact before the jeep was skidding across the road and crashing into the ditch on the other side. The last thing he could remember was shouting Stiles’ name before he was plunged into darkness.
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
Derek hazily opened his eyes. He felt like he'd been asleep for hours but the surroundings were only marginally darker than he remembered. He had a splitting headache and he could feel multiple wounds in his body beginning to heal themselves. He winced as broken bones mended and torn muscles joined back together. It only took him a moment to remember what happened and he jerked his head toward Stiles.“Stiles! Oh god…” The door was caved inward, forcing Stiles against the seatbelt and toward Derek. There was blood on the dashboard and the window was completely shattered, glass shards everywhere. Stiles had a gash across his forehead and several cuts on his arms. Derek could smell more blood than he could see, and that terrified him. Stiles was completely still. “No.. not again… please not again…” He unbuckled himself and slowly tried to inch toward Stiles without causing too much movement. He groaned at the sharp pain shooting through his arm as he reached up to put a hand on Stiles’ face. “Stiles. Wake up. Please. Stiles. You have to wake up.” Derek began desperately slapping his cheek and talking louder and louder until Stiles blearily opened his eyes. Derek almost cried with relief. “Derek?” Stiles’ eyes were glassy and unfocused. “Oh my god-” He cried out in pain as he tried to move closer to Derek.“Don’t move. You’re injured.”“So are you…”“I’m healing. Try not to move, ok?”“Hurts…” Derek's stomach dropped. Stiles never complained. Something had to be incredibly painful before Stiles would admit that he was hurt.“Where? Stiles, where does it hurt?”“My side… I think it's bleeding…” Derek swore. “I'm coming over to take a look, ok? Hold still.” Derek ignored the pain to the best of his ability as he opened his door and stumbled out to the other side of the jeep. He gripped the mangled driver side door by the handle and ripped it off if its hinges. His head spun as the scent of blood hit him square in the face. He gasped when he saw the source; a large, jagged piece of glass deeply pierced into the left side of Stiles’ abdomen. Blood was pouring out of the wound. Horrified, Derek quickly ripped off his jacket and gently pressed it up against the wound to try to staunch the flow of blood. Stiles moaned at the contact. “Shh… I’m sorry. What do I do? Stiles, what do I do?”“I have to… get out... of this... position…too cramped…” Stiles took shuddering breaths with each word. Derek tried and failed to keep his composure. “I’m afraid to move you with the glass still inside of you. Should I-”“Can’t take it out.” “Are you sure? If it keeps moving around-”“Too much blood. You can't take it out.” Stiles' voice was quiet but firm. Derek felt a few tears drip down his cheeks, noting that Stiles seemed very determined to stay calm despite clearly understanding the reality of the situation.“Ok. Ok. Here's what I'm going to do. I'm going to pick you up slowly and try not to jostle you at all and then I'll sit you down so you can lean back on the jeep. Can I do that?” Stiles took another shuddering breath and nodded. He slowly raised a shaky hand and pointed at Derek’s forehead. “You're bleeding.” Derek hadn't noticed and couldn't care less considering the circumstances. “I'll heal. You know that. I'm going to pick you up now, ok?” Stiles smiled softly and nodded again. As gently as he possibly could, Derek got a grip under Stiles’ knees and back and started to pull him forward. Stiles remained stubbornly quiet, although by the time Derek finished lowering him to the ground he had squeezed his eyes shut and tears were flowing steadily from them. Derek knew that Stiles was forcing himself to be so calm for his benefit. He couldn't do this. Not again. He absolutely could not go through this again… but he had to. He had to do whatever Stiles needed. He would do anything to save Stiles, and he would save Stiles. He gripped Stiles’ hand and started drawing his pain, cursing himself for not thinking of it sooner. “Don't… you're hurt too…” Stiles whimpered, eyes still closed.“I don't care. I can take it.” Derek gritted his teeth against the pain snaking it's way up his arms. He was starting to get lightheaded when Stiles pulled his hand away.“Stop. Please. You need to stop.” Stiles was pleading, and Derek obeyed. Hot, angry tears stung his eyes. Stiles was alarmingly pale and a sheen of sweat covered his face despite the chilly night air. “Thank you.” Stiles looked like he was about to nod off, and Derek panicked and responded with a sharp slap on the cheek.“Oh, no you don't. You're not doing this to me. I won't let you. You're going to make it through this. We're going to make it through this. Promise me?” Derek knew he was being ridiculous but he needed Stiles to say something, anything to convince him that this night wouldn’t end in tragedy.Stiles spoke slowly and dazedly. “Promise. You might be onto something with that jeep.” Derek surprised himself by laughing out loud. “God… tell me you'll at least get rid of it now.” Stiles grinned weakly, one hand on his left side and the other holding onto Derek’s shirt, as if the tangible, physical connection to Derek would tether him to life. Derek moved to help him put pressure on the wound, but Stiles shook his head. “Call… 911…”“Of course… how the hell haven't I done that yet? I'm sorry-” Stiles cut him off. “It's ok. Shock probably. You sure you're ok? Need a hug?” Derek leaned in and gave Stiles the most tender, gentle kiss he could muster before jumping up and peering back into the broken jeep to find his phone. What he found was the shattered remains of what used to be a phone and a more colorful side to his vocabulary that he previously hadn't known he possessed. He returned to see Stiles looking slightly amused. “Easy there, sailor. I have a phone too. It's in the back right pocket. Can you get it? I don't think I can.” Stiles was taking heaving breaths by the time he finished the sentence. Derek kissed him on the forehead and reached for his pocket, quickly pulling out the bloody piece of technology. He breathed a sigh of relief when the screen immediately lit up. “What's your passcode?”“Sourwolf.” Stiles answered without missing a beat. “Are you serious?” Stiles laughed weakly and nodded. Derek unlocked the phone and immediately dialed. He waited. And waited. He swore and dialed again, and then tried Scott and the Sheriff and Lydia and 911 a few more times. “GODDAMNIT! There's no signal.” Stiles looked startled at the outburst, but he didn't respond. Derek gave up on calling and shot out a few quick texts to everyone he could think of:
CALL 911
STILES IS HURT
NEAR THE PRESERVE
IT'S BAD
HELP - I DON'T KNOW HOW LONG HE HAS
Derek watched as each text came flashing back to him with a ‘not delivered’ message. He swore under his breath.“Derek?” Stiles glanced up at him tiredly. “It's alright, Stiles. It's going to be just fine. Scott will find us. He has our scents. Your dad will wonder where you are. Lydia will-” he stopped dead in his tracks before he could blurt out what had just come into his head. Stiles finished the sentence for him.“Lydia will sense that I'm dying.”“You're not going to die. Is that understood?” Stiles chuckled. “Yes sir.” He shifted himself slightly on the ground and cried out when new agonizing pain erupted in his side. He tried to bite back the scream but he couldn't, nor the uncontrollable weeping that followed. Suddenly the ground was spinning, the darkness was suffocating, and all of the oxygen seemed to be vacuumed from his lungs. He could feel every drop of blood leaving his body and he could just barely make out Derek’s expression of fear through his blurry eyes. Stiles panicked.
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
“It's ok. I've got you. It'll be ok. I'm gonna take more of your pain, ok? I've been healing more and more and I’m completely capable of taking your pain, I promise. Breathe with me, ok? Like this. Good. You're doing great.” Derek kept his voice as level as he could manage while taking Stiles’ pain with one hand and softly combing through his hair with the other. “I need to move the jacket a bit, ok?” The makeshift jacket-bandage hand fallen from the wound and blood was pouring freely again. It was a deadly amount of blood and Derek knew it, but he held the jacket steady and kept firm eye contact with Stiles. He refused to lose hope. Stiles trusted him and Derek would be there for him. Derek would take care of him. He had to. He wiped the tears from Stiles’ face and took as much of his pain as he could while continuously muttering encouragements and reassurances. Derek was crying himself, despite his best efforts to keep his cool for Stiles’ sake. Stiles’ body was wracked with tremors and he looked like any moment he might throw up or pass out. Derek just breathed slowly and evenly, gently encouraging Stiles to follow his lead. Eventually Stiles started to steady his breathing and loosen his death grip on the front of Derek’s shirt. He took several slow, steadying breaths before speaking. “Do you have any idea how perfect you are?” Derek was so caught off guard that he almost let go of Stiles’ hand.“What?”“Just… with all of this. Thank you.” Stiles gripped his hand tighter. Derek choked back a sob. “Of course. Always. You know I'm always here for you. How can I help? What can I do?” Derek waited impatiently for Stiles’ response. Stiles paused for a long moment, meeting Derek’s glistening eyes with a steady, hard gaze. “I'm in love with you.” Stiles smiled, as if enjoying the way the words sounded out loud. Derek stared, stunned. Nobody had ever said that to him. Not once. And this was Stiles.“Stiles! I love you so much. You're everything to me. I love you. God, I love you.” Nothing made Derek spill his guts quite like a perilous situation. Stiles smiled wider.“That's very good news. Otherwise this would have been super awkward.” Derek laughed and cradled Stiles’ pale face in his hands, bringing him into a kiss. Stiles shakily returned the kiss for as long as he could before pulling away to gasp for air. “Derek… it hurts…” Derek pulled away immediately. “What hurts? The kissing?” “Breathing...” Derek's heart sank. Stiles’ eyes were half-closed and each breath he pulled in was shallow and labored. His face was becoming paler and paler and there was a slight bluish tint to his lips. Derek couldn't help but think this wouldn’t have had to happen if Stiles had the bite. He'd thought it many times before but he fully respected and understood Stiles’ decisions. Besides, it would be too late now anyway. He was too weak. The bite would kill him if the blood loss didn't kill him first. Derek didn't know what to do besides continue to comfort Stiles with words and physical contact. Stiles instinctively leaned in toward the warm touch. “Don't move, Stiles-” “It's alright, Der. I'm ok.” It was an obvious and incredible lie. Derek wanted to scream. This couldn't be it. Stiles couldn't go through everything that he'd been through just to be killed by an idiot drunk driver. Derek could not lose him. He grabbed Stiles’ phone again and started furiously composing texts. He must have sent fifty before Stiles stopped him.“It's ok, Derek.”“It's not-”“Derek. Listen-”“No. No. Help is on the way and you are going to be just fine.”“Der-”“I won't argue about this!”“Der…no…I…can't…I… can't...breathe….” Without another word his eyes slid shut and his head slumped forward onto his chest. “Stiles! Stiles?!” Derek frantically felt for a pulse and thought his own heart would stop when he couldn't find one. Without even thinking about what he was doing Derek laid Stiles down and started performing mouth to mouth the way Deaton had taught him. “Come on, Stiles- come on..” He pressed down on Stiles’ chest four times and returned to the breathing. He choked out a sob when Stiles gave no response. He repeated this cycle three more times before Stiles finally, finally pulled in a ragged breath for himself and opened his eyes. Derek sat back on the dirty ground and sobbed. Stiles was alive. He was still alive. Stiles coughed and gasped for air. Derek gently helped him to sit back up and laid him against his chest. He adjusted the jacket-tourniquet again, trying to ignore the blood soaking through it. Stiles’ heartbeat was faint, but it was there. He lay limp against Derek’s chest, breathing shallowly and slowly. He was completely unresponsive. Derek just held him. There was nothing else to do. A few minutes later Derek finally heard the sirens. Dozens of people with flashlights and shouting voices started running towards him. He picked Stiles up, kissed him on the forehead, and started stumbling toward them. The EMT's reached him first and gently took Stiles from his grasp. He reluctantly let go and stared as they started rushing him to the ambulance. He ignored the probing questions about his own health and breathlessly began speaking. “Drunk driver - slammed into the driver side - there's glass in his left side - I tried to stop the bleeding - I don't know how long I was out after the hit - he stopped breathing - I gave him mouth to mouth-” He stopped when he met Scott’s terrified eyes a few feet away. “Oh god, Scott… I'm sorry… I couldn't do anything…” Scott pulled him into a fierce hug and cried into his shoulder.“Derek, I can't do this again-”“I know, I know, I'm sorry…” Derek was interrupted by the EMT's shouting and the sheriff swearing in sync. Derek closed his eyes, waiting for the words that he knew were coming next.“We're losing him. He's not breathing - get the defibrillator.” They worked quickly and forcefully, desperately swarming around his lifeless body. Derek couldn't see Stiles anymore; he could only hear the sound of the electricity attempting to jumpstart his heart. He held onto Scott for dear life and turned to see Lydia standing several feet away, looking petrified. She had a distant, tortured look in her eyes and when she lifted them to meet Derek’s gaze, he knew what was going to happen before it did. “Lydia, please no-”She screamed.
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
Derek really, really hated hospital waiting rooms. They were too familiar, too helpless and monotonous. He wanted to detach; to just slip into the depths of his subconscious and pretend that done of this was happening. Stiles was still alive. That was what the doctor said. He was alive. Derek wanted more. He wanted to know that Stiles was fine or great or maybe sitting up in bed drinking coffee and requesting to talk to him. Still, Stiles was alive. Only minutes earlier it had almost been over. His heart had stopped. He was gone. Lydia screamed for him. Derek glanced over at Lydia. She was leaning against Scott’s shoulder, exhausted. Derek couldn’t stop picturing the look in her eyes after she’d let out that terrible scream and fallen to her knees. Derek had wanted to go help her up but he couldn’t seem to tell his body what to do. He had been frozen to his spot on the grass, stunned. He couldn’t speak. He couldn’t move. He couldn’t even cry. The sheriff had his head in his hands but he made no noise. Scott looked just as paralyzed as Derek felt, but he found a way to snap out of it and guide Lydia to her feet. And Lydia… Lydia’s eyes… Derek had to force himself to look away from her. He couldn’t handle it. He just stood there, defeated until he just barely processed Scott violently shaking him by the shoulders and shouting into his ear.“DEREK! Derek. Listen. Listen-” Derek tuned out the background noise around him and just focused on Stiles until he heard what Scott was referring to: a heartbeat. Then another and another. The EMT's were shouting but Derek couldn’t understand what they were saying. All he could hear was Stiles heartbeat. Lydia was weeping, Scott was holding her, and the sheriff looked like he’d just finishedm having a heart attack. Derek swayed and suddenly sat down on the grass, adrenaline completely gone. He could see Scott looking at him with concern, but he only focused on the sound of that beautiful heartbeat still going.Scott’s anxious voice brought Derek back to the present of the brightly lit waiting area. “He’s going to be ok, right?” Derek couldn’t tell who he was directing the question toward. The sheriff looked up but he didn’t respond. Lydia just buried her head into Scott’s shoulder. Scott looked to Derek, desperate. Derek spoke with far more conviction than he felt.“Hey, we’ve been here before, remember? He’ll be fine. Absolutely fine.” Scott smiled sadly. “Thanks Derek.” Derek knew that he was referring to more than just the encouragement, but he couldn’t help but think that he really didn’t deserve Scott’s gratitude. Lydia suddenly spoke for the first time since arriving at the hospital. “He’s right, you guys. Stiles is still here. He’s alive. It’s going to be fine.” The new look in her eyes revealed that she wasn’t only speaking as an optimist, but as a banshee.Derek practically shoved Scott aside to give her a hug, and the sheriff finally smiled with relief. Scott was beaming with laughter as he pushed Derek away and slid back into his seat.“Dude, I know you and Stiles have no concept of personal space but I do, and no offense but you could really use a shower.” Derek laughed and rolled his eyes.“I wish we could go see him.” The others nodded in agreement. The sheriff glanced up at the front desk, impatient for some news. Scott and Lydia tried to distract themselves by watching the television on the wall. Derek finally relaxed for the first time since he woke up in the broken jeep.
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
It was late the next day when Stiles opened his eyes again. “Derek?”“Stiles! Oh, thank god, Stiles-”“Derek, what-”“You're ok. The doctor says you'll be ok. You've had some emergency blood transfusions and you had surgery to remove the glass, but you're going to be fine. You're ok. You're ok.” He was crying and staring at Stiles as if he were a ghost. Stiles stared at him for a long moment. “What happened?” Derek sighed heavily and wiped at his eyes. “Your heart stopped. I thought… Lydia screamed and… I thought you were gone…” Stiles slowly sat up, leaned forward and kissed him softly.“Not going anywhere. Promise.” “You promised that you wouldn't die.”“I didn't die.”“You died for a few seconds.”“Yeah, but I came back.”“You flatlined.”“But I didn't die, so I technically didn't break my promise. My honor is still intact.” Stiles smiled and Derek mentally thanked every god he could think of that he was still able to see that beautiful smile. “Don't do that again.” Derek frowned, but it didn't reach his eyes.“I was totally going to, but I won't now because you said that.” Derek let himself laugh. Stiles let a few tears fall. “You saved me, Der. I'll never be able to thank you enough.” “You're damn right about that.” Stiles laughed, surprised. “Geez… I'm trying to be sappy here.” Derek kissed him again.“We have plenty of time for that.” He started moving to keep kissing until he heard the undeniable sound of the Sheriff clearing his throat in the doorway.“Want to save some visiting for the rest of us?” Stiles giggled as Derek’s face turned bright red. The Sheriff walked to the bed, closely followed by Scott, Lydia, and Melissa. “You scared me, kid. I'm so glad you're ok!” Stiles smiled. “Me too, dad. How did you find us?”“Some of Derek’s texts finally went through, thank God.” Stiles looked at Derek, who hadn't torn his gaze from Stiles’ face. Scott spoke next.“Dude, you have to stop doing this. I need to watch you at all times or something. Don't do that again. Ok?” Scott’s watery smile broke Stiles’ heart. He looked him firmly in the eyes and nodded. Lydia sat down and grabbed his hand.“I screamed for you. I'm not doing that again. Ever.” Her eyes were sparkling with tears. “I'm sorry Lydia.” She sighed and leaned in to hug him. “Stiles, do you need anything? Pain meds? Water?” Melissa's voice was calm and warm. “By the way, I'm mad at you too but I still have to perform my nurse duties.” Stiles laughed. “I'm just tired.” She checked his bandages and turned to the others. “He needs rest.” They reluctantly stood and started heading for the door. “We'll be back soon, ok?” Lydia smiled warmly and hugged him again.“Thanks Lyds.” Scott moved in for the next hug, being careful to be overly gentle. “No dying while we're gone.” Stiles chuckled.“Scott, I'm pretty convinced at this point that I'm literally incapable of dying.”Stiles dad leaned down to hug him and by the time he pulled away his face was wet. “Get some good rest.” “I will, dad.” Stiles watched them each walk out, already wanting to be with them again despite the urge to go to sleep. Derek was the last to get up.“Are you alright by yourself?” Stiles smiled up at him. “I'm not by myself. I'm never by myself. You guys won't leave me alone.” Derek laughed. “Good.”“Derek, could you do something for me?”“Of course! Anything! What do you need?” Derek looked worried and started eyeing Stiles up and down as if to analyze whatever needs he could possibly have. Stiles stared back, completely deadpan.“I think I'll be needing new windows for the jeep.” Derek somehow laughed and groaned simultaneously. “Like hell. I swear, if I ever see that thing again-” Stiles cut him off. “-it'll be too soon? Look at this. We finish each other's sentences. How romantic.” Derek rolled his eyes. “For the love of God-”“Come on, Sourwolf! We always have our most romantic moments while I'm in the hospital, remember? Last time you asked me out. The standard is pretty high now, buddy.” “Fine. I'll cook you dinner when you're released from the hospital.” “I don't believe for one second that you're capable of cooking dinner.”“Is that so?” Derek looked amused. Stiles smirked.“I'm skeptical, but I've been wrong before. It's extremely rare, but it happens. Amaze me.” Stiles grinned again as Derek laughed. “Whatever. I'll see you in a bit.” Derek started standing up again. Stiles could feel himself starting to fall asleep. Derek moved towards the door. “Der?”“Yes?”“Love you.” Derek paused and turned his head back to Stiles. “Love you too. Get some sleep.” He smiled and walked out into the hall. Not even a full minute later he was back, looking sheepish. “I don't know how they expect me to just leave you alone in here.”Stiles laughed softly. “Then don't.”Derek smiled, satisfied and moved to sit on one of the plastic chairs by the bed. “Are you sure? I can go if you want me too.” Stiles responded only by slowly moving over on the bed and gesturing for Derek to join him. Derek kicked his shoes off and gently climbed onto the small bed, lying back and putting an arm around Stiles. He closed his eyes and listened to the steady, mesmerizing rhythm of Stiles’ heartbeat. He'd never heard a better sound.Stiles felt so warm, so comfortable. He was safe. Maybe hospitals weren't always so bad. He looked up at Derek who seemed to be asleep already. He smiled fondly and curled up against him, thanking him internally for everything that he'd done to keep them safe. Stiles smiled again, knowing that he'd have a far less panicked night with Derek right next to him. He felt drowsiness drawing him in and he soon fell into the best sleep he'd had in weeks. THE END
|
10686303
|
Jealousy is a green-eyed
|
{
"Archive Warning": "No Archive Warnings Apply",
"Category": "F/F",
"Characters": "Kara Danvers, winn schott jr, Cat Grant, Lena Luthor",
"Fandom": null,
"Language": "English",
"Rating": "Teen And Up Audiences",
"author": "by Apartmentfortytwo",
"chapters": "1/1",
"completed": "",
"published": "2017-04-21T00:00:00",
"words": "1,141",
"Additional Tags": "jealous lena and jealous cat is what i live for, also kara confused and wondering what to do",
"Relationship": null,
"Character": null,
"Relationships": "Pre-Established SuperCorp, Supercorp - Relationship, Karlena - Relationship",
"Series": "A Luthor & a Super",
"Collections": null,
"Fandoms": "Supergirl, supercorp - Fandom, Karlena - Fandom, Supergirl CW, Supergirl DC, Kara Danvers - Fandom",
"Archive Warnings": null,
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"Words": null,
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}
|
The electricity in the air cut the perky blonde right in half, and that's saying something considering needles can't go through her body and she's supposed to be bulletproof, right? But this moment is killing her, in the best of ways. She couldn't process how this all happened, or why she was feeling like this. She had seen them before. Individually but... Still. She shouldn't be so... Aroused? Weirded out? 'Shook' like Winn said? She wasn't sure which.
Cat Grant surprisingly came back today, and while Kara is pleased to see the blonde again, she's also praying Lena won't be as punctual as usual. It is already bad enough that Snapper uses her friendship with Lena to get scoops out of the CEO. If Cat Grant knew that Lena Luthor was best friends with Kara, she would never hear the end of it.
Which is why she's baffled, standing in the entrance of Cat's office, mouth gaped and eyes wide. Both women had been talking. Lena got there early. While she wasn't there. They were sat, cross-legged, laughing at the jokes they shared, while simply, lowkey (or maybe not so much) flirting with one another. And Kara was dead.
The heroine was certain that was how aneurysms felt like. She was about to collapse. Words failed her miserably and she could tell that both women were staring at her. Concerned painted on Lena's features, while Cat simply looked weirded out.
"Ke-erah? You failed to mention Ms. Luthor and you were... Going out."
And that's what brought her back to reality, eliciting a small burst of giggles from the girl of steel, who was completely disarmed and taken aback. Her arms and hands moved almost inhumanly, pretty much blowing her cover.
"We— She's my best friend. We got– We are– Clark- She and I are best friends since the venue accident thing."
At that moment, Lena couldn't have had a bigger smile in her face. Kara alone was adorable. But Kara struggling to explain the nature of their bond was extremely cute. She felt the need to step in and help her, but she got it done just right.
"Well, you could've emailed me this information. After all, it is a pretty big deal to be best friends with the second most powerful woman in National City."
"And who would be the first?" Lena's curiosity got the best out of her and she smugly asked, tilting her head and raising an eyebrow, at Cat's statement.
Both threw their heads back in laughter while Kara simply stared back and forth at them as if she was in a tenis match "If Kara's busy, I can always reschedule. Kombucha can wait, right, Sugar Kellogg's? It's not like it's going anywhere. Wouldn't be the first time we have to reschedule." Lena looked at Kara with a playful smile, tilting her head. There was a glimpse of sadness over having to push forward that date yet again. Lena just really wanted to take Kara away from work and the stressful process that it takes to become
That nickname came up when Lena realized the sugar intake Kara had per day, and well, it only seemed to fit her the best. Cat simply shook her head, placing a hand on Lena's knee "If Lena Luthor needs my former assistant, she can have it for as long as she needs." Turning back to Cat, Lena squinted her nose adorably, before smiling "Why thank you, Ms. Grant."
What on Earth was going on? Lena was being friends with Cat Grant? Yep. Kara's death was nearby. The hand on Lena's knee only sent a wave of jealousy through her body, for some reason. And Kara just chose to shake it off her body. There was no way Lena would even consider her in that way, right? But hey, she did bite her lip a lot when they glanced at each other and she did call her her hero... Things were just confusing.
But then again, Cat was back. And she wasn't sure how would Lena react when she found out her boss and her had had drunken sex with her as Supergirl, which Lena didn't know either. Although she acted like she was super stupid and naive which really just gave it off that Lena knew about Supergirl and Kara.Sighing, Kara offered a somewhat form of a smile before nodding at Lena "Shall we, L?" The brunette nodded before she rushed out of Cat's office, leaving a hurried 'NiceToSeeYouMsGrant' over her shoulder.From her desk she could see the interactions between the two women, who simply grinned and laughed, hugging at the end.
"Women in position of power will be the end of me." The heroine muttered, resting her elbows on the desk and holding her head between her hands.
This was most likely to kill her easier than kryptonite.
Middle aged women in position of power only seemed to be Kara's biggest go-to when it came to being attracted to women.
She was doomed.
After a brief hug and a few 'Call me for drinks's and a small set of giggles, Kara was seeing her best friend exit the office, only to have her grab the lapels of her blazer and steal a hot kiss that she made sure was long enough for Cat to catch a glimpse of.
Kara was Lena's, and Lena wasn't stupid. She knew things. And she wasn't going to let Cat Grant take away her best friend. Or, you know. Her newly acquired girlfriend.
Stammering and struggling to find words, Kara opened her eyes and looked at Lena, who was giggling like a schoolgirl. "Yes, Kara. I /know/ and... I know." Her head went to her chest, where the S would be located at, now covered by a button up, before slowly moving her eyes towards Cat's office "It was obvious. And... She did kind of show off when we were talking... Now... I think I need to have a chat with Supergirl... Tonight."
Kara was phased. She couldn't believe the past 20' of her life. First, two women from her past and present had met, and she had turned into a pool of melted alien goo and now? Now Lena's lipstick was smeared on her lips, while she tried to hold onto the little air her brain could tell her to intake.
"I'm–I'm sure she will want to see you. Too. Don't – Don't worry I'll pass... Her the message."
The brunette CEO smiled satisfied, before nodding and starting to walk to the elevators.
Winn looked at Kara, baffled "You lucky alien you..." He said, while Kara just choke back into laughter before blushing madly.
"Ke-erah? I believe your girlfriend is waiting for you. Chop chop!"
And with that, Kara rushed along with her things in her arms, catching along with Lena.
|
10668489
|
Bad New Day
|
{
"Archive Warning": "No Archive Warnings Apply",
"Category": "Gen",
"Characters": "Peter Parker, May Parker (Spider-Man), Harry Osborn, Joseph \"Robbie\" Robertson, Betty Brant, Mysterious Guest Star",
"Fandom": "Spider-Man (Comicverse)",
"Language": "English",
"Rating": "General Audiences",
"author": "by quietprofanity",
"chapters": "1/1",
"completed": "",
"published": "2017-04-19T00:00:00",
"words": "3,831",
"Additional Tags": "Crossover",
"Relationship": null,
"Character": null,
"Relationships": null,
"Series": null,
"Collections": null,
"Fandoms": null,
"Archive Warnings": null,
"Categories": null,
"Bookmarks": null,
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}
|
~*~*~He didn’t expect it to end like the way it did.Of course, Peter Parker wasn’t sure how he expected it to end, but he was sure it involved him screwing up – botching a job, getting exposed as Spider-Man – and Jonah screaming at him to get out of his office and never show his face and possibly never work in this town again.Instead, it ended in Robbie’s office, and it ended quietly. Robbie had taken Peter by the arm before he’d even gotten within shouting distance of Jonah’s office. Peter was shocked. Jonah hadn’t been impressed with his work lately – the last few pictures had come out a bit blurry – but he’d thought he’d gotten some pretty good ones of his fight with the Shocker this morning.The reality was much more mundane, and yet somehow much more crushing.“I hate to be the one to tell you this, Peter,” Robbie said. “But we can’t take your work anymore.”When the words hit Peter’s ears, he’d felt a little nervous, but he’d talked his way out of worse near-firings before. “Just wait until you see these pictures.” Peter began to pull them out of the folder. “I’ve got some really great angles on the shots, and …”Robbie shook his head and pressed his hands against Peter’s, stopping them from pulling the pictures out further. “You don’t understand. It’s not that I don’t want them. But we have a number of staff photographers already, and we’ve had to fight to keep their jobs.”Peter felt the blood drain out of his face. He knew about the bad economy, but he thought with the new direction of the paper, with his years of experience, that this wouldn’t happen to him.“I’m sorry, Peter,” Robbie placed a hand on Peter’s shoulder. “It’s not you. It’s every freelancer who works here. If I could, I would give you a staff job. But it’s not my decision and …”“But I’ve given you these pictures for years,” Peter’s hands were shaking. “I’ve been here longer than some of those staff writers.”“Our movie critic and our restaurant critic have been here for decades, but I had to fire them right after the market crashed,” Robbie said.Peter pushed the pictures back in the envelope. “So … so this is it?”“Look,” Robbie said. “I know you’ve been able to branch out into other fields. So if you ever need a recommendation, you can come to me. All right?”Peter nodded and mumbled a “thank you” as he walked out of the office. He knew Robbie meant to be encouraging, but his words somehow made him feel worse.He looked around the newsroom as he walked out. At the far end he could see into J. Jonah Jameson’s office. Jonah yelled something Peter couldn’t decipher into the phone. After a moment he hung up and shook his head. He looked up. Peter wondered if Jonah saw him, because Jonah looked sad for a moment, then scowled as he picked up the phone again.Peter turned his eyes to the reporters’ cubicles. Half of them were empty, and of those that were, half of them were bare. Many of the ones working looked very young – possibly just out of college. Ben Urich was still there, but he was the exception to the rule.And there was Betty, too. Betty looked up from her computer and raised her hand to her mouth.“Oh Peter!” she jumped out of her chair and hugged him. “Peter, I’m sorry.”Peter hugged her back. Ben realized what was happening and got up from his desk as well. He slapped Peter on the back.“They told us about the freelancers during a staff meeting,” he said. “I’m very sorry.”Betty broke the hug and nodded. “If you ever need help, just ask. Okay, Peter?”“Yeah,” Peter said. “Yeah, thanks.”Betty gave him another hug.Peter nodded at the both of them. “Well, see you around,” he muttered and walked toward the exit.“Stay in touch!” Betty called.Peter walked out of the offices and into the stairwell. He thought of going up to the roof, of changing into his Spider-Man costume and clearing his head web-slinging around the city, but he couldn’t find the heart or energy to do so. He took the stairs down to the street and began to walk away.~*~*~“Well, you had to have expected it.”Peter looked up from his latte when the words came out of Harry Osborn’s mouth. He’d come to see Harry at the Coffee Bean hoping his best friend would give him some encouragement. So much for that. Then again, Harry did give him the drink for free …“Expected it?” Peter said. “Look, I know my work hasn’t been perfect, but I’ve worked for The Daily Bugle for more than a decade.”Harry shrugged. “I’m not saying it’s fair. But don’t you read Forbes or anything? Robbie was right. You’re lucky you lasted as long as you did.”Peter sighed. He looked over at the papers on the newsstand. The Daily Bugle mentioned the fight today, but there was no picture. He noticed the paper seemed a little smaller as well and wondered if it had always been that way.“I mean,” Harry leaned back on the plush chair, “do you know how many people Oscorp has had to lay off? It’s somewhere in the hundreds, Pete. I’ve had to cut back on a lot of my expansion plans for this place, too. It’s just ugly all over.”Peter pondered that for a moment, then said, “It doesn’t make things any easier, though.”“Yeah, I guess it wouldn’t,” Harry admitted. “But hey, you’ve got a degree. You can find another job. I could always vouch for you if you wanted to go back into the science field.”“So I can get laid off again at a place like Oscorp?” Peter shook his head, “My degree is more than ten years old. What am I going to do at my age? Get an internship? I’m too old for that. Besides, I’m … not cut out for nine-to-five work.”“Oh come on,” Harry said. “Thirty isn’t that old. Some of the juniors from back in college were that age. And you couldn’t have gone running after peanuts from the Bugle for that long. We all got to grow up sometimes.”Peter was about to say something when the first few notes of “Dangerous” broke up the smooth jazz muzak floating throughout the coffee shop.“Girl, I’ve been noticing …” The song stopped as Harry reached to his side and pulled out his cell phone.“Hello?” he said into the phone. “Oh, Lily! You want to go where? Usual spot? 11 p.m. Yeah, sure I got time for you, baby. Pleeeeenty of time.” Harry winked at Peter.Peter decided he didn’t want his coffee anymore. Harry was still talking as Peter walked out the door.~*~*~To walk from the center of Manhattan to Forest Hills would be long and impossible. He owed it to himself to get in his Spider-suit and web-sling the rest of the way home, or at least use some of his meager funds for a subway ticket and catch the 7 Train, but some things he was just not ready for, so he began to wander.He still couldn’t quite get over what Harry said, how Harry acted. Had Harry always been like that? He seemed so different from what he remembered.Actually, life these days had seemed so different. He’d been through worse times, but he couldn’t remember when his options had felt so limited, when it seemed like he could do barely anything at all.For most of his life as Peter Parker he felt like he was on some sort of eternal treadmill. Every time he tried to break out of his pattern, tried to go back into science, back to school, into teaching, he would soon be back on the treadmill, would need to fall back into taking pictures. It was frustrating, but also a sort of comfort. If everything was lost, he at least had the Bugle job. But now the job was gone. The treadmill he had hated so much was broken.Peter walked past a couple kissing on the sidewalk. He felt a bit of an ache in his heart as the boy ran his fingers through the girl’s long, red hair, but as soon as he did he felt foolish. Sure, someone to share his life with – someone like a wife – would be nice, but that wouldn’t solve his problems now. It would just mean that he’d have someone to disappoint with the news that he lost his job.Then he remembered he did have someone to disappoint with the loss of his new job. Aunt May was doing better than she used to, but he wanted to help her, even if it was on the barest amount of income. Maybe Harry was right. Maybe a new job was the answer.But when he thought about that Peter felt sick to his stomach. He’d been let go from The Daily Bugle before, but … was this really it? Would he really never work with Betty and Robbie and even Jonah again? Was that really the end of all that time, all that work, all those relationships he forged? Just an apology and a promise of a recommendation for jobs he would never be able to hold.What was he supposed to do?His Spider-sense began to tingle. He flinched as a car zoomed down the street. He heard sirens, but they sounded like they were far away. Possibly too far.Peter looked around, both with his eyes and with his spider-sense, making sure nobody was around. He took a moment to duck into an alley and get out of the street clothes he wore over his costume, then started scaling a nearby wall as he pulled on his mask.“At least I can do this,” Spider-Man thought to himself.He ran across the rooftops, then shot out a web as soon as he got close enough. He swung down on the web, landing on the roof of the car. Spider-Man’s spider-sense buzzed. He dropped to the roof as a bullet shot from the passenger-side window. Spider-Man then lunged forward, grabbed the shooter’s wrist and pulled the shooter through the window.The shooter thrashed in his grip. Spider-Man prepared to web him up but the car made a sudden swerve. An attempt by the driver to throw him off, Spider-Man thought. This type of criminal was so predictable that way. No other cars were on the streets, so Spider-Man quickly created a webbing-net in front of the car. The car made a hard left in an attempt to turn around, but instead skidded straight into it.The man in his arms yelled a curse. Spider-Man tossed him into the web and wrapped more webbing around him. The shooter was incapacitated, but unfortunately the time Spider-Man took to do that allowed the driver to run out of the car and escape down the alley.Oh well, Spider-Man thought. He won’t get far.Spider-Man leaped from the car roof and ran down the alley. As he did so, he wondered why he thought that. After all, he thought he had a job – not just a job, the job he had for more than a decade – this morning. What if he suddenly wasn’t able to do this? What if something went wrong? What could he count on anymore?He caught up to the driver of the vehicle. The driver stood in the alley, his back turned to Spider-Man.Spider-Man stopped. Why was the driver doing this? Did he feel remorse, maybe? “Look, I don’t know what you did, but running away from the police will only make it worse. So if you turn around now …”His Spider-sense buzzed and he ducked, but the driver had thrown a canister above his head. The gas made a “fsssssh!” sound as it escaped from both sides of the can. Even through the full face mask, it stung his eyes and lungs.Spider-Man coughed in large heaves as he stumbled away from the gas cloud. He could still hear the man running away, then the familiar sound of a fist punching against the soft flesh and hard bone of a face.It took a few minutes before Spider-Man could process what happened. He looked up to see the driver on the ground, being tied up by another man. Spider-Man squinted once more and his eyes finally focused on the other vigilante. He didn’t recognize him – this odd man dressed entirely in white – but he felt familiar somehow, like an old acquaintance from a time of his life now forgotten.“Hey thanks, man,” Spider-Man said. “He caught me off-guard, there. I really appreciate it.”The man in white raised his head to meet Spider-Man’s. He wore a white, metal mask that showed a man’s face twisted into an unmoving scowl.“Caught you off guard? No,” the man said. “You hesitated, blinded by doubt and misplaced mercy. Only the innocent deserve mercy.”Oh great, a crazy Punisher fan, Spider-Man thought. He thought this trend had died out years ago. “I don’t know who you are,” Spider-Man said, “but if you’re thinking of killing this man …”“No,” said the man in white, “The use of force for evil ends begets an equal use of force to stop it: no more, no less. This man is only a robber.”“ … Ah,” Spider-Man said. So maybe he wasn’t a Punisher fan now. Maybe a Venom fan. He made a mental note to look out for this man in the future. The guy seemed a little crazy. “Well, thank you, anyway. If you want I can bring this man to the police.”The man in white groaned. “We finally meet and you’re concerned about the minutiae of turning in a criminal? Don’t you care about anything I just said to you?”“Well, not really,” Spider-Man said, letting the annoyance he felt drip into his voice. “I’ve kind of had a bad day.”The man in white straightened his back and folded his arms. “Outside influences are irrelevant and not an excuse to neglect our mission. It is the duty of all who serve the white principles –”“White principles?” Spider-Man said.The man in white paused, “The good principles. Those who serve the good principles must be ever-vigilant. No outside influences must erode their commitment to justice.”“Right,” Spider-Man began to turn away. “Well, nice talking to you, but I didn’t really need a lecture in being good, thanks.”“No?” the man in white asked. “Didn’t you just doubt your ability to do your job? Why would you do that? You were intended to serve good principles despite your setbacks. You will always serve good principles despite your setbacks.”Spider-Man didn’t know whether to feel insulted or encouraged by this strange man. He turned back to him. “How did you know I was doubting myself, anyway?”“I know you,” said the man in white. “And I know a lot about you.” He turned and walked back down the alley.“Wait!” Spider-Man leaped upon the nearby wall and climbed along it to catch up with the man. “What’s going on here? I … I somehow feel like I know you, too. What are you?”“A minor figure,” said the man. “Although one whose influence extends across the universes. They don’t understand me. They hate me. But they are fascinated by me.”This was getting really weird, now.“I can relate to the fascination part,” Spider-Man said as he continued to climb after him. “Especially your outfit. How do you manage to keep a suit like that so clean?”“The principles of good keep me clean!”“You mean you don’t use a little bleach?”“You fool!” the man in white stopped walking and turned his scowling mask to meet Spider-Man’s. “You think you are defined by your profession? By your friends? By your marital status? They look up to you because you stand for what is right, and what is right and what is wrong shall never change, even in dark days.”Spider-Man could finally see where this was going. It was still weird, of course, but then again, Spider-Man remembered talking to giant mystical spiders recently, so he felt like he could handle this guy. He shifted so he was sitting on the wall.“I think they like how I climb up walls and go web-slinging, too.”“Well …” the man in white said, the sureness in his speech wavering. “There is that. Nevertheless, doubt is a waste of time.”“But what am I going to do without my job?” Spider-Man asked. If he was talking to anyone else, he would realize how out-of-nowhere and weird that sounded, but he had a feeling the man in white already knew his troubles. And even if he didn’t, he wouldn’t tell anybody else. “I don’t know how to be anything other than a freelance photographer.”“Nonsense,” said the man in white. “What were you when you began? You were a fifteen-year-old student who had suddenly turned the only caretaker of his parent, who responded by remaking himself in a new profession, appropriate for one who is young, and forging himself through work, through benefiting through his pursuit of justice. And yet they have chosen to see your natural setbacks as evidence of a failure of character, for they have internalized themselves as failures, and will not allow you to be anything but a failure.”“Hey!” Spider-Man said. “That’s going too far. People screw up sometimes. I screw up sometimes. Screwing up once in awhile doesn’t make them failures. I mean, I totally believe in personal responsibility, but sometimes bad things just happen to good people and they can’t control it. People who worked hard are hurting now. And I want to inspire those people, not judge them or guilt them into being good.”The man in white stared back at him, saying nothing.Spider-Man sighed. “But it’s hard to do that when you’re so used to living in a world that doesn’t exist anymore.”“Your situation is unfortunate but not unique,” said the man in white. “You were created of a certain time and place, now worn away through the natural progression of life. The world where you were born is not the world you live, as much as it would be denied. It is the fate of all of our kind who are kept alive through tradition and money.”“I … I’d like to think it’s more than that,” Spider-Man said. “I’d like to think I’m liked.”The man in white bowed his head, the eyes of his mask covered by his fedora. “I … I don’t know very much about being liked.”That’s obvious, Spider-Man thought.“But, well, you’re right about the world changing,” Spider-Man said. “I just want to give people something new for this new world. I just want to give people answers.”The man in white looked up at him. “So, what are those answers?” he asked.The question shocked Spider-Man, especially since it was the first of the man in white’s questions that sounded like genuine searching and not like a professor’s test.“I don’t know,” Spider-Man said. “I don’t know what I’m going to do.”The man in white sighed and adjusted his hat. “Neurotics,” he said. “They’re always the same.”He began to walk away again, and Spider-Man got the impression that he shouldn’t follow him this time. Suddenly, he began to remember things.“Hey!” Spider-Man called. “Hey, Rex!”The man in white froze, then turned to look at him.“Yes?”“What happened to you? You had a staff reporter job, didn’t you?”The man in white was silent for a moment, then spoke again. “I … I had to leave. They wanted me to write about Paris Hilton.”“I’m sorry, man,” Spider-Man said. “I wish you luck. Vic and Walter, too, if you happen to see them wherever you’re going.”“I don’t believe in luck. Only action.” The man in white sighed. “But what a world …”And then he was gone.~*~*~Spider-Man woke up on the ground, his head groggy and his stomach sick. When he looked around, the man in white was gone.The gas, Spider-Man thought. That must have done it. It must have been a dream. He looked back to the street where he had chased the car and saw a pair of policeman removing the man from the web. Well, at least he’d been able to do something good.Spider-Man raised his hand, and realized he was clutching something. He opened it to find a card, one half white, the other half black.Spider-Man shook his head and smiled. He tucked the card beneath his belt and went to collect his clothes.~*~*~Aunt May was out when he got back home, but he only had to wait a half hour before she returned. He didn’t waste time. As soon as she had sat down at the kitchen table, he told her what happened.“Oh, Peter, I’m so sorry,” she said, laying her hands over his right one. “You must be so upset.”“Well, the first shock is over,” he admitted, absently flipping the black-and-white card between the fingers of his left hand, “but I’m not sure what I’m going to do next. I mean, what are you going to do?”Aunt May shrugged. “Well, I’ll be fine. For now, it’s just money. We still have our lives and each other, after all.”“It seems like that’s easy to say now,” Peter said. “They say we’re in something like the Great Depression.”Aunt May laughed. “Well, I have experience in that, don’t I? Although I never thought I’d be around to see another one.” She stood up. “ Still, the fact that I’m here again says something about the ability to live through times like this. Why don’t you brush up your resume while I start dinner?”Peter stared at his aunt. “Aunt May, how old are you, again?”“Don’t be rude,” she said as she reached for a pot above the sink. “You’ll be thankful when we need to start cooking pigs’ heads and cabbage again.”“Do we not have McDonald’s anymore?”“Peter, get to work.”Peter smiled. He looked back at the card. What a world, indeed. Maybe he didn’t know what to do. And maybe that made him neurotic. So, what? Lots of people didn’t know what to do. Lots of people were scared right now. And he would be there for them, just as he always was.He tucked the card in his back pocket and went upstairs to his room, thinking of how he once walked down those steps in his blue suit and glasses, eager to sell his first pictures to Now magazine, ready to forge a new life in the wake of trouble.The End.
|
10674693
|
Korolievskoie AU
|
{
"Archive Warning": "Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings",
"Category": "M/M",
"Characters": "Sebastian Smythe, Kurt Hummel, Blaine Anderson, Hunter Clarington, Sebastian's Father (Glee), Blaine's Father (Glee), Burt Hummel",
"Fandom": "Glee",
"Language": "Русский",
"Rating": "General Audiences",
"author": "by littlesuekzn",
"chapters": "1/2",
"completed": "",
"published": "2017-04-19T00:00:00",
"words": "1,582",
"Additional Tags": "Alternate Universe - Royalty, Freeform, Humor, Prince Sebastian, Prince Blaine, Arranged Marriage, BAMF Kurt, Prince Kurt, I'm trying to have fun and make it an easy reading, it's nonsense",
"Relationship": null,
"Character": null,
"Relationships": "Kurt Hummel/Sebastian Smythe, Kurt/Sebastian",
"Series": "Kurtbastian short fics by littlesuekzn",
"Collections": null,
"Fandoms": null,
"Archive Warnings": null,
"Categories": null,
"Bookmarks": null,
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}
|
Цель была прямо перед глазами. Оставалось преодолеть десятиметровый коридор, двух простофиль-охранников и подозрительно разросшийся куст гортензии, за которым могло скрываться все что угодно. В данном случае Себастьян надеялся, что там его путь к спасению. Но мог оказаться и полный провал, который грозил пожизненным позором и бесчестьем. Не то чтобы его особо волновало, но семья не одобрит. И черт бы побрал гребанные приличия, но он здесь именно для того, чтобы спасти себя и не разозлить ни отца, ни уж боже упаси, дядю. На другом конце коридора один из охранников зевнул и лениво почесал пониже поясницы. Себастьян сморщил нос и попытался окончательно слиться с колонной. Медлить было нельзя. Иначе он мог упустить того, ради кого он уже битый час крылся по углам Западной Оранжереи – месте настолько непопулярном, что даже садовник, похоже, забросил наведываться сюда… судя по кусту гортензии. Сам Себастьян не был здесь с 13 лет, когда он приперся сюда, чтобы дать в нос Хантеру, но тот уже тогда был ушлым засранцем и натравил на него тетю с ее фрейлинами. Как ему тогда удалось вырваться от этих причитающих гарпий, Себастьян гадал до сих пор. И вот, спустя почти десять лет, он снова здесь, а место облюбовал человек, от которого зависело его будущее. Страже не жить! Себастьян досчитал до трех. На другом конце коридора послышался храп. Значит стратегическая доза снотворного, своевременно добавленного в обед этих громил наконец подействовала. Всего-то на час позже, чем следовало. К слову, считал до трех он уже в двадцать седьмой раз.Себастьян аккуратно выглянул из-за колонны и убедился, что стража нейтрализована. Пока все складывалось удачно и, прокравшись на цыпочках по заветному коридору, он наконец преодолел все препятствия…включая куст гортензии. Заросшие просторы Западной Оранжереи встретили ароматами трав и цветов. Тропинок за разросшимся безобразием было практически не различить, поэтому Себастьян решил пересечь оранжерею поперек. Время на поиски скучавшего в этом растительном хаосе Принца было ограничено. Собственно, стоит начать с самого начала. Чудесное западное королевство Вестервиль было богато и процветало. Потом, как это и бывает столь часто с безмятежно цветущими державами, нагрянул кризис власти. Как раз сейчас Себастьян деликатно пытался восстановить баланс и вернуть все на круги своя. На самом деле он старался ради себя любимого, но если попутно удастся выручить из щекотливого положения монаршую семью и любимую родину, то тоже неплохо. Отец Себастьяна в свое время был наследником трона. Но успешно ушел от удара, скинув бремя правление на своего младшего брата, удачно женился и безмятежно радовался жизни. Себастьяну повезло безмерно: он был богат, красив и происходил из королевской семьи, при этом у него совершенно не было обязательств наследственного рода – он был вольной пташкой и всю жизнь завидовал самому себе в своем безмерном счастье. Нынешний король, он же любимый дядя, имел двух сыновей, и это скрашивало жизнь Себастьяна гарантией, что свою свободу он сохранит навсегда. Первым тревожным звоночком был, конечно, Купер. Наследный принц, первый в линии на трон, сбежал. В смысле, этот прохвост с пяти лет заявлял, что уйдет выступать с бродячим театром. Естественно, за годы подобных заявлений, он усыпил бдительность всех и вся. Поэтому когда однажды его действительно не оказалось во дворце, а через месяц пришло письмо с афишей, на которой красовался «Великолепный Куп – актер и талантище», то все были в шоке. Но Себастьяна такой поворот не насторожил. На самом деле, он рассудил, что так даже лучше. Закидоны Купера иногда наводили на мысль, что тот пустит их по миру и разбазарит все королевство. Итак, наследником объявили Блейна. Ответственный, дружелюбный, благородный – просто прекрасный сладкоголосый Принц из сказки. Уж эта кляча должна была выиграть Себастьяну гонку! Блейн хлопал своими воловьими глазками и заставлял верить в светлое будущее. Естественно Себастьян расслабился. Ему бы в голову не пришло, что что-то может омрачить его свободную жизнь богатого популярного холостяка. Он кутил и наслаждался вниманием первых красавцев королевства. Но естественно, по случаю его личного счастья, засранцы из южного княжества Кармел должны были начать проявлять агрессию и демонстрировать захватнические намерения. Себастьян предпочел бы обойтись без подобных неудобств, но на всякий пожарный морально приготовился съездить на фронт и произнести парочку приветственно - ободряющих речей. Не сложилось. Ибо отец с Королем, хоть и растяпы, которые уже третий год не могли отловить Купера в его гастрольном турне, сработали на опережение и заключили договор с северным соседом. Лима – это огромная ледяная пустошь, простирающаяся до куда хватало карт. Заполучить такого союзника было все равно, что принести топор на игру в мяч. Бессмысленно конечно на первый взгляд, но внушительно, наводит страх и в случае чего отбиваться от него будет нечем. Таки да, да здравствует топор!Правитель Лимы (королей у них не водилось, только избранная власть) видимо решил укрепить позиции с новым союзником и скрепить все браком. Дядя был счастлив до безумия. Его так пробрало, что с радостных вестей он наклюкался вдрызг и орал на весь тронный зал, что уедет в чертям в деревню на покой. Себастьян конечно повеселился от души. Блейна тоже впечатлило. Он вроде тогда еще был в себе и вполне благосклонно отнесся к идее. Но потом приехала делегация с Севера. О суровости северян слагали легенды. Они были высокими, мускулистыми, носили короткие стрижки, много оружия, а их манера говорить могла посоревноваться только с лаконичностью их имен. Стоит пояснить, что для них считалось зазорным иметь в имени больше одной гласной! Серьезно! Пак, Сэм, Мэт, Финн… Односложность понятий, выражений и манер сделала Блейна немного нервным. Но Себастьян всегда был хорошим братом и в подробностях расписывал достоинства северной нации. После его рассказов Блейн обычно бледнел. Но пробрало его конкретно пожалуй на встрече со сводным братом его суженого. Два метра ростом, неосмысленный взгляд и рукопожатие, после которого стоило бы навестить костоправа. Исключительно из любви к кузену, Себастьян попросил рассказать о сыне правителя и будущем супруге наследного принца. Ответ звучал гордо и состоял из пяти слов: «Сильный, храбрый, весь в отца». Тут стоит добавить, что правитель Лимы был тучный мужчина, крепко сбитый и высокий, с лицом лишенным изящества, совершенно незапоминающимся и с устрашающим взглядом бешеного быка. Блейн окончательно скис. Хорошо бы Себастьяну и насторожиться, но нет! Как он мог забыть, что в детстве его кузен мечтал встречать красивых утонченных юношей на балах, а не спасать их от драконов из высоких башен. Все ведь было так очевидно!И вот наконец договорённости были достигнуты, бумаги подписаны, свадебные подарки отгружены. И, помянутый не раз, сын правителя Лимы должен был прибыть утром…Слуга разбудил Себастьяна посреди ночи. Его быстро притащили в кабинет отца и плотно заперли двери. Кроме них в кабинете заседал еще и дядя-король. Судя по утомленным взглядам, желание надраться до потери пульса у обоих вот-вот могло взять верх. Но все сдерживались, чтобы донести до Себастьяна главную новость приходящего дня. Блейн, подлая скотина, прикинувшись овечкой безобидной, напросился на прогулку. Все бы ничего, но стоило ему оказаться за воротами, как он рванул со всех копыт, да так, что угнаться за ним не смог никто. На самом деле он просто накануне откормил до отвала всех лошадей, так что те были неподъемными. Додумался же засранец. В такой манере он добрался до обители святого Далтона. Монастырь конечно странный выбор для столь горячего и любвеобильного юноши, но ворота монахи запирали во время своих песнопений недели на две и вломиться туда было большим богохульством. Так что принц Блейн прикрыл свой зад со всех сторон и был таков. В свете обстоятельств, дядя заявил, что наследственных прав племянника никогда не лишал, так что теперь Себастьян старший принц, ему и жениться на суровом северном мужчине. Надо добавить, что к стулу Себастьяна не приковали до свадебной церемонии лишь потому, что ноги его к окончанию речи уже не держали и он поклялся, что не пополнит ряды сбегающих принцев в этой семье. Собственно, его не столько брак пугал (были у северян уж очень горячие экземпляры), сколько вероятность вскоре стать королем. Это ж ответственность. А Себастьян и ответственность - слова антонимы. Наверняка в одном из словарей так и указано. Ничего не попишешь, нужно было в кратчайшие сроки ликвидировать дефицит неженатых принцев в этом королевстве. Дядя и слышать ничего про своих оболтусов не желал, ему сейчас хватало забот о том, как сбагрить Себастьяна вместо Блейна дорогому северному другу. Но отец решил дать ему шанс и все же выпустил из поля зрения. Хотя вариант с кандалами рассматривали серьезно. Хантер конечно засранце, но он был хорош в одном деле. А именно в охоте. К тому же его повеселило отчаянье в глазах Себастьяна и за ним числился старый карточный долг. Поэтому выколупывать Блейна из Далтона была его почетная обязанность. И Хантер обещал справиться, но для этого нужно было время. И его обеспечением пришлось заняться самому Себастьяну. С утра пораньше пустив ищеек на поиски Купера, чем черт не шутит, он начал планировать встречу со своим будущим желательно не-супругом.
Однако этикет грозил все подпортить. Согласно договоренности, после того как они решили наконец, что наследует трон Себастьян – ему и женихаться, должен был состояться обмен соглашениями со всеми и вся. Уже после этого, вечером их должны были обвенчать, ну и пир и прочее. Однако, старший сын правителя Лимы равнодушно собирался отправить на церемонию согласования своего брата, демонстрируя полное безразличие к будущему супругу, по мнению Себастьяна. Поэтом увидеть его новому наследному принцу Вестервилля грозило лишь на свадьбе. Сейчас стоило проявить прозорливость. Единственное что пришло в голову Себастьяну, это прокрасться к принцу, попросить его не соглашаться, пообещав, что такой несомненно лакомый кусочек, как Блейн скоро прибудет и уж он-то станет отличным супругом. Не чета всяким Себастьяном. Не то чтобы Себастьян сомневался в собственной привлекательности, но было логично, что большому северному мужчине больше приглянется милашка Блейн, а не высокий и дерзкий «дикий принц», как его прозвали в народе. (Народ конечно так Себастьяна не звал, просто тот любил себе польстить, а еще в душе он был немного анархистом). Именно эти причины побудили Себастьяна сыпать всякую дрянь охране в еду и шарахаться по заброшенным оранжереям, в которых прятался серверный варвар.
|
10684551
|
Operation SQ
|
{
"Archive Warning": "No Archive Warnings Apply",
"Category": "Gen",
"Characters": "Sonic the Hedgehog, Original Characters",
"Fandom": null,
"Language": "English",
"Rating": "General Audiences",
"author": "by NetRaptor",
"chapters": "7/7",
"completed": "2017-04-20",
"published": "2017-04-14T00:00:00",
"words": "21,558",
"Additional Tags": "Snow, Winter, Survival, Wolves",
"Relationship": null,
"Character": null,
"Relationships": null,
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"Collections": null,
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|
"You little creep! I'm gonna GET you!"
Sonic looked around to see a purple porcupine tear past, a
wooden contraption clutched in one hand. A second later a female
echidna flew by, a stick held in her fist. "Looks like Spike did it
again," Sonic muttered to himself, and hurried after the two.
The echidna had cornered the porcupine as Sonic jogged up. She
was waving the stick in his face and yelling, "You could have killed
me with this! What were you DOING? Trying to pin me to the wall?"
"Whoa, whoa, time out," Sonic interrupted. "Zephyer, what's up
with you?"
The echidna looked at him, eyes like blue fire. "What's up with
me? This lunatic just tried to kill me, that's what's up with me!" She
shoved the stick into Sonic's hands. It was a straight, sanded stick
with feathers glued to one end. The other end was sharpened to a point.
The hedgehog looked at the porcupine, eyebrows lifted. "You shot an
arrow at her?"
"It was an accident," Spike said, holding out the thing in his
hand for proof. It appeared to be a small bow nailed to a board. "I
was trying out my crossbow and it misfired. I'm sorry, Zeff! Really!"
She glared at him. "That thing hit the wall two inches from my
head. Some misfire." She paused to flip her dreadlocks out of her
face, then shook her fist under Spike's nose as a final warning.
"I'll let you have it if you ever do that again," she growled, then
wheeled and stalked away through the snow.
Spike and Sonic watched her go. Zephyer had been in Knothole
nearly a year. Although her warm clothing hid it, she was robotized
from the throat down as a permanent reminder of her encounter with
Metal Sonic. She also had a terrible temper.
Sonic looked at his old rival with a crooked grin. "You're
lucky you got off so easily."
"I know," Spike replied, wiping a gloved hand across his
forehead. "She said she was gonna put that arrow through my gullet."
Sonic handed it to him. "Thanks," Spike said. "It's my only one."
"Where'd you get a crossbow?"
"Made it. Found some old diagrams and Tails helped me." Spike
grinned. Tails had developed the reputation of 'quite the mechanic'
ever since he, Sonic and Knuckles had returned from the coast that
summer.
"Cool!" said Sonic, as proud as if he had built the bow
himself. "I didn't know you liked that kind of stuff, Spike."
"Sure, why not?"
"Well, catch ya later. It's almost lunchtime."
Spike watched Sonic crunch away through the village of
Knothole, and his smile faded. He had lived there for nearly four
years, and he had yet to feel really at home. Sure, he and Sonic had
gotten over their differences, but while there were almost every
species of Mobian living in the village, there were no other
porcupines. His family had been torn apart when Robotnik captured
Mobitropolis. Although his story was different from most other
refugees', it remained terribly painful to him, and he avoided
thinking about it. But he had an odd fondness for Tails, and only
Sonic knew it was because the fox reminded him of his younger brother
who had been murdered.
The porcupine slipped his arrow into the crossbow and slid the
bolt back until it locked, then aimed at a nearby tree trunk. The
arrow thudded into the bark with such force that a bit of snow sifted
from the branches. Spike pulled it out, noting it had sank in an
entire inch. It probably would have injured Zephyer, if not killed
her outright. That girl ... she drove him nuts. She probably wouldn't
be so tough if she weren't robotized. He heaved a visible sigh into
the cold air. Maybe this evening he could whittle some more arrows.
* * *
"Sally, come here a minute." Slasher, the winged velociraptor,
stood at the door of one of the supply huts. Sally, seeing the
worried look on the raptor's face, hurried up and stepped inside.
The squirrel was struck by the odor of rot and damp. Horrified,
she saw a large water stain on the ceiling and rafters, and that the
crates of food supplies had gotten wet and moulded. "Slash, what
happened?"
"Remember that rainstorm we had last week?" Slasher replied
grimly. "When the main shed had a hole ripped in the roof? We
carried everything over here. Unbeknownst to me, this shed's roof
leaks."
"It never did before!" Sally exclaimed. "The wind must have
damaged it, too." She looked at the crates of spoiled food. "What
are we gonna do?"
Slasher shifted her wings against her sides and sighed softly.
"I guess we throw out the bad stuff and see what's left."
The two knew quite well that more than half the village's
winter supplies were housed in that hut.
After a couple hour's sorting and discarding, the two found
that three-fourths of the supplies were unsalvageable. The only
things that remained unhurt were the canned goods.
"I could provide us with fresh meat," Slasher said, leaning
sideways against the wall, "but I'd have to run myself ragged to do
it. There's not much game around here. I guess we have enough food
to last until next month if we stretch it ..." She looked at Sally
with one green eye.
Sally looked back at her from her seat on an overturned crate.
"Maybe the other bands could help us out. You know, loan us supplies."
Slasher tapped her teeth together. "We could try that, I
suppose. We'd better tell the Freedom Fighters tonight. Don't let
on to the villagers that anything's the matter. We don't want to
alarm them unless it's serious." Deep inside, Slasher was fearful.
Knothole was the band that always produced a surplus in food supplies.
Find supplies elsewhere this time of year would be a desperately
difficult task.
* * *
As dusk fell in shades of blue, word spread that Slasher and
Sally were hosting a Freedom Fighters-only meeting in the community
cabin. One by one the band straggled in and sat down. Spike was one
of the last to arrive, a handful of twigs and a knife in one hand.
He took a seat near Sonic and Tails. "What's up?" he asked them,
sighting along a stick and beginning to whittle away at it. Sonic
shrugged. "We don't know, but Sal sure looks worried." Slasher,
however, didn't, and was off in a corner joking with a few of the
Freedom Fighters. It was this fact that reassured everyone who
entered--if Slasher wasn't worried, then it couldn't be anything
serious.
At last all the Freedom Fighters were assembled and waiting,
curious. Slasher nodded to Sally, who stepped up on the fireplace
hearth and cleared her throat. "All right everyone, listen up," she
began. "Today we checked the main supply shed, and the roof has
leaked and spoiled almost everything." She paused and looked around
the room. Every eye was fixed on her. She went on, "We have enough
food for maybe another month, but there is no way we'll make it to
spring." She looked at Slasher, who stood. The raptor was tall
enough for everyone to see her without her needing to stand on
something.
"After talking it over with Sally," Slasher said, gazing
around the room, "I've come up with a plan. It's not much, and it'll
require a lot of work. To avoid scaring the villagers, we'll call it
Operation SQ--Survival Quest."
Everyone listened closely as Slasher explained that groups of
three or four would journey to all the neighboring villages and
Freedom Fighter bands, to see if anyone had a surplus they would be
willing to share. It was quite simple, if not for the winter storms
that hit about once a week. Each team would have a certain route
and destination, and carry lots of protective gear. Slasher herself
would fly eastward to a band they had formed an alliance with, but
was too far away to hike to.
* * *
Spike, Sonic, Zephyer and Tails were on one of the teams.
Zephyer and Spike exchanged an icy glance and resolved to stay away
from each other. Sonic and Tails, knowing the cold war between the
two, tried to break the ice by demonstrating snowshoes and helping
load backpacks. They met at dawn on the path leading out of the
village.
"Okay," Sonic said, holding out a piece of paper with directions
scribbled on it. "We're going to Cedarwood, about ten miles from here
as the raptor flies. We'll cross the river, hike west until we hit
the highway, then follow that south until we get to Castle Creek.
Cedarwood's just a minute's run from there."
"If you say so," said Zephyer dubiously. She was wearing black
ski pants and an insulated jacket over her metal, only her silver
hands and feet showing. Her red dreadlocks hung free in the frosty
air. "How long will it take us?"
"All day," Sonic said cheerfully. "Let's juice!"
The four shouldered their heavy packs (they were already wearing
their snowshoes) and trudged down the path in single file.
Sonic felt a surge of pride. He was leading an expedition into
the heart of the frozen woods on a quest that must not fail. This
would be much more fun than any game. He glanced at the leaden sky
that hid the rising sun from view. They'd probably have snow by noon.
Behind Sonic was Spike, limping along on his snowshoes, trying
to keep from stumbling and humiliating himself. Why couldn't they
just walk normally? The path was firm enough, he guessed. He had left
behind his crossbow, but not his knife. He could whittle some of the
arrows he had brought along. Why did Zephyer have to come, anyway?
She wasn't a Freedom Fighter, not really. His lower jaw thrust out,
as it always did when he felt peevish.
Tails trotted lightly behind Spike, spirits high. Man, this was
fun! The only thing that could have been better was if he could have
flown them there himself in the Tornado. But the biplane would have
had nowhere to land and refuel, Slasher had pointed out. His pack was
heavy, but he was strong for his age. He had even brought along his
jet anklets acquired on his previous adventure in case he needed to
do some speed-hovering. Who cared about the weight of a backpack on
a hike like this?
Zephyer brought up the rear, walking carefully on her snowshoes.
They didn't have snow on her home planet; just dust and rock. The cold
was unbearable--how could Sonic, Tails and the jerk with the purple
hair stand it? They didn't even have the extra protection of metal!
Well, if they could bear it, then so could she. Odd stuff, snow. It
fell from the sky in silent flakes, like rain in slow motion, and was
crunchy, hard and slippery all at once. The food problem; now that
was scary. Like those years the agricultural domes had been damaged
by the tornado storms, and they never had enough to eat. No one but
the leaders, who made everyone work like slaves while THEY never went
hungry. At least they didn't have kind of tyranny in Knothole.
After a while the river came into view, a mass of black ice
sprinkled with grey snow. "C'mon," Sonic called to his team, stepping
fearlessly onto the ice. "It's thick enough to walk on. Don't worry
if it cracks. It's when water starts oozing up that you're sunk." He
flashed a grin over his shoulder, but only Tails grinned back.
The ice was slippery and only an inch or two thick. Below was
the muffled sound of running water as the river continued to flow
beneath. The ice was paper thin in spots, and air holes gaped darkly
here and there. Sonic confidently led the way across the thinnest
part, the ice cracking and creaking ominously beneath his weight.
The other three followed his lead wordlessly, trying to deafen
themselves to the sounds. But in spite of all the threatenings of the
frozen river, they made it to the far bank unscathed.
None of the villagers had been across the river in a while,
and the snow was unbroken. The four trampled a path with their broad
snowshoes, Sonic working hardest of all in the lead.
They hiked through the silent woods for hours, hardly speaking
to each other, saving their breath. At ten o' clock the snow began,
drawing a veil around them. Sonic began halting every fifteen minutes
to check his compass; it would be easy to get lost.
At noon they halted and ate a ravenous lunch from their
knapsacks, then Sonic led them on. They were headed south now, into
the heart of the Great Forest. Sonic was pretty sure of the way, but
just doubtful enough to be more careful than usual.
It was four o' clock and beginning to fade toward twilight
when they struck Castle Creek. Relieved, they trudged along the iced
banks, looking about for the village. Before long they smelled
woodsmoke, then were hailed by a sentry. "Who goes?"
"Sonic and his group!" the hedgehog called back. "From Knothole."
"Oh yeah," the voice said. "Slasher said you were coming. Go on
in."
A dense hedge ahead turned out to be the wall that screened
Cedarwood from sight. Sonic pushed open a wooden gate, and the four
stepped inside.
It looked a lot like Knothole, with huts and cabins erected in
two ragged rows, blanketed with snow, lights shining cheerily from
windows. A few villagers moved about here and there, and looked
curiously at the strangers as they passed by. The four waved, weary
but cheerful, anticipating a warm bed and hot food.
The leader of the Cedarwood band was a heavy-set bear with a
robotized right arm. He welcomed them into the largest hut and had
them sit by the fire and thaw. "I'm Steelpaw," he told them.
"Welcome to Cedarwood, fellow Freedom Fighters. What can I do for
you?"
Sonic wasted no time. He explained about the accident with the
supplies, and their need for more to last them through the winter.
The bear looked grave when Sonic finished. "I'm sorry," he told
them, "but we only have enough food to last us through the winter,
and that on strict rationing. Crops were bad this year. We thought
that certainly it would be better down by the river ..." Steelpaw
trailed off. The four looked at each other, flagging hopes evident
in their faces. "I'm sorry," the bear said again. "Now, we'd better
see to your accommodation for the night."
The four were put in a large guest hut. Sonic, Tails and Spike
shared one room, and Zephyer took the other. They ate a disappointed
meal of watery soup, supplemented with food they had brought from
home. Then they sat in a semicircle facing the crackling fire and
talked dispiritedly.
"This is only one village," Tails said. "The others probably
had better luck than we did. Could be that we'll get back and--"
"Or not," Spike interrupted. "We might find that nobody had
food to spare. It was too dry this summer."
"Plenty of water down in Sapphire City," Sonic muttered. "Too
bad Chaos didn't flood this area with rainwater."
"Is there ANYWHERE we could get more supplies?" Zephyer asked.
It seemed incredible to her that they were living on a populated
planet and couldn't find enough food. On her planet, the echidnas and
the giant swifts were the only inhabitants, and the swifts did not
farm. "What about all those cities? What about Riverbase?"
"You can't get to Riverbase in the winter," Sonic said glumly,
cupping his chin in his hands and staring into the flames. "It's
too far and too rough. Maybe Slasher could get through, but she
couldn't begin to haul back the stuff we need."
"If you'd like to walk, go ahead," Spike told Zephyer
sarcastically.
"Why don't you go hunt us some food with that bow and arrow of
yours?" she retorted.
"Oh, shut up," Tails said patiently, as if addressing two pups.
"You don't have to fight ALL the time." The fox looked at Sonic.
"What about Knuckles? Could he help?"
The hedgehog shook his head. "Naw. Food's not one of his big
worries and he doesn't save much more than he needs for the winter."
The four stared into the fire for a while without speaking.
Spike broke the silence. "What's up north?"
"The Ice Cap range and wolves," Sonic replied promptly.
"What about that fortress of Robians?"
"What about it?"
"Well--"
"Yeah, right," Tails broke in. "Slasher told me about them.
They keep to themselves and kill anyone who so much as sneezes
within twenty miles. _I_ think it's really one of Robotnik's bases."
Spike opened his mouth to reply, then shut it again. No use
arguing that that was where his parents had fled to.
"They'd have food," Sonic commented, enjoying his depressed
mood. "I've heard they farm all the little valleys up there. Lots
of lakes and stuff."
Shortly after that they went to bed and snuffed out the lights.
Spike lay in his sleeping bag in the floor and gazed at the dancing
orange light on the ceiling. He wanted to see his family again to
badly it was kind of a physical ache. He might even have an excuse--
to get food supplies for Knothole. He could strike out on his own;
no, no, that would be dumb. What if something happened and there was
nobody to help him? Maybe he and Sonic could go. Or Tails. Tails
might go with him.
The porcupine put himself to sleep outlining plans for a march
into the north.
Zephyer lay in her sleeping bag on the bed, gazing out her open
door into the firelit other room. The boys were asleep, or so she
guessed from the multiple snores rattling the shutters. She could
not sleep properly when she was this tired. Alone in the dark, her
defenses against the world came down. Her mind drifted into memories
of her own family--her younger brother and sister, he mother and
father. Life was hard on X-R7, but she had not realized how hard
until she saw Mobius's greenery and mild climate. Even now, after a
year, she found herself disliking it. She was a desert creature,
born and bred. The cold was something alien, and she could not bear
it long. She wanted dry, flaming heat--not this humid stuff of the
Great Forest. She wanted to go home. But going home was impossible.
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
Only two memorable things happened the next day.
The youngsters of Cedarwood had seen foxes, porcupines and
hedgehogs before, but never an echidna. They swarmed around Zephyer,
looking up at her with round eyes, touching her clothes and patting
her fiery hair. She went down on one knee in the crowd and talked
to them patiently, then picked up a toddler who had escaped from his
mother. As she handed him back to his mom, the baby sneezed in
Zephyer's face. All the kids laughed, and the squirrel apologized.
"I'm sorry! Baby has a cold and shouldn't be outside."
Zephyer grinned and wiped her face. "No harm done."
Sonic, Tails and Spike watched all this from a distance with
surprise. Zephyer was so hot-tempered with her own age group, they
had not expected her to be gentle with little kids. It had made her
happy, for she was in high spirits as they trudged out of the
village on snowshoes.
The day was clear as crystal and stunningly bright, but
twenty degrees below. The four made good time back toward Knothole,
simply trying to stay warm. They arrived back at the river by two
o'clock, and Sonic led the way across.
The ice had thickened with the cold and barely creaked as they
crossed. Sonic paused at the center, where it had been so thin the
day before. "Rock solid!" he said, stamping one foot. "Maybe we can
get Rotor to build us some ice skates!" He turned to walk on,
stumbled, and fell through the ice into the black water below.
The snowfall of the day before had covered a large airhole with
a thin layer of snow. When Sonic stepped on it, the crust gave way.
The other three saw him fall and heard the splash, and ran to the
hole with cries of concern.
The hedgehog bobbed to the surface like a cork, gasping, "Great
moons of Mobius! Cold! Cold!" He floundered wildly and grabbed at the
rim of ice. Three pairs of hands reached out to grab him. They hauled
him out of the killing water and onto the solid ice. Sonic had been
in the water barely a minute, but already his heavy clothing was
soaked and his teeth were chattering like jackhammers. "Quick,"
Tails exclaimed, "we gotta get him home or he'll freeze to death!"
Zephyer took one arm, Spike took the other, and Tails grabbed
the back of Sonic's jacket and spun his tails. "Go!" the fox commanded,
and the three took off. Tails drove them on by activating his jet
anklets. "Hurry, hurry!"
"We are!" Spike gasped, trying not to fall over his own feet.
They fled across the river's frozen expanse and onto the hard
trail under the trees on the other side.
A lone figure sat in the shadows beneath the trees in a small,
neatly-made snow fort, invisible to all but the keenest eyes. He had
seen the whole thing and was laughing, very quietly, to himself.
"Sonic, you poor fool," he muttered in amusement. "I don't know why
your kind wasn't exterminated ages ago."
He sat back in the snow, elbows grating metallically against
it. A robot could sit for hours in the snow and never feel the cold
like an organism would. He had staked himself by the river to watch
the comings and goings of Knothole village. The data would be useful
at a later date.
Receiving transmission.
"Oh really?" the robot muttered. No one had contacted him in a
long, long time. He had betrayed too many companions and clients.
Curiosity circuits activating a bit, he opened his internal
transmission channel. "Yes?"
"Greetings, Mecha bot four."
"Ditto, Mecha bot two. Well well, it isn't like you to contact
ME, of all droids. What do you want?" Robo Knuckles had not spoken to
Metal Sonic since the fall of Robotropolis. The two robots cordially
hated each other.
"What is your current location?"
Robo Knux leaned against the wall of his snow fort and placed
a hand behind his head. Mecha would love this. "One point three
kilometers from Knothole village."
He could almost see Mecha's red eyes brighten fifty watts. "You
ARE? Do you intend to level it?"
"Not at the moment," Robo Knux replied in the lazy tone he knew
his rival hated. "It isn't in my current best interests. What'd you
call for? To check up on your poor brother?"
Metal Sonic's voice had a hiss in it. "YOU are NOT my BROTHER."
He paused and seemed to get a grip on himself, for when he spoke
again his voice was calm. "I need your help."
"Oh yeah?" Robo Knux scoffed. "Since when have YOU ever needed
MY help, Mecha bot two?"
"Shut up and listen. Since Chaos was defeated, Master has
commissioned me to build him a weapon that will not fail. I need you
to find the android called Kardot. She is somewhere in the
Mobitropolis valley, within two hundred miles of your current position."
"Kardot?" Robo Knux said scornfully, green eyes flashing yellow
unintentionally. "What kind of a stupid name is Kardot?"
"Do not say that to her face," Mecha purred. In all conversations,
the robot who succeeded in irritating the other scored a point. So
far they were even. "She is as unpredictable as yourself."
A jab, but Robo Knux ignored it.
"She came to Dr. Robotnik for repairs. He embedded a tracking
device in her system, of the same high frequency we used in
Robotropolis. You should be able to locate her that way."
"Clever," said Robo Knux, cutting a double furrow in the snow
with his knuclaws. "What do you want her for?"
"I need her schematics," Mecha replied. "And I want you to
bring her to me."
"Me?" Robo Knux said, startled. "Why do you need me? Spare
parts?"
Metal Sonic gave a digital chuckle. He had unsettled his rival--
another point in his favor. "No," he said. "I need the battle
information stored in your OS. You have the most advanced battle
programming of any robot in the world."
Robo Knux saw a chance to get under Mecha's skin. "Even better
than yours, correct?"
It was a subtle way of making Metal Sonic admit Robo Knux's
superiority, and they both knew it. Mecha hesitated, then submitted.
"Correct."
A point in Robo Knux's favor. They were again even.
"My construction date is set for this March," Metal Sonic
continued. "You must bring Kardot to me before then."
"Where are you?" Robo Knux asked, gloating over having made
Mecha admit his inferior programming.
"The Final Egg ground base, near Sapphire City," Mecha replied
coolly. "You are a Mecha bot. You will be able to locate us." He
paused, as if about to sign off, but added as an afterthought, "Do
not harm Kardot. She is very valuable. Her technology far surpasses
anything you or I possess."
"Is that so?" Robo Knux asked. "What are her weapon systems?"
"She has none that I know of. I meant that she could be
mistaken for an organism, so close is she to a biological body. Be
gentle with her."
"Don't worry," Robo Knux said, waving a hand, although Mecha
could not see it. "I'm always careful with prisoners."
"See that you are. Mecha bot two, out."
* * *
Sonic huddled in a pile of blankets before the fireplace in
the community hut, teeth still chattering, spines drooping and wet.
"Are you sure you're okay?" Tails asked anxiously.
The hedgehog nodded. "I'm ok-k-kay, really." He tried to stand
up to prove it, but yelped and fell back. "My ankle!" he moaned,
clutching his right foot. Tails and Zephyer pounced on his foot, and
Zephyer got there first. She eased his shoe and sock off, and found
his ankle already discolored and starting to swell. The echidna
prodded it experimentally. Sonic twitched and yelled, "OW!" He
jerked his foot away and looked at her with the wounded air of one
who has been slapped for no reason.
"It's not broken," she told him, pretending to ignore his
glare. "Let me get something to wrap it up with."
"Forget it," Sonic growled, hiding his foot under the blankets.
"It doesn't hurt THAT bad ... oh, ouch!" He thrust his foot out
again, for the touch of the blankets was painful.
"Stay here, tough guy," Zephyer grinned. "Tails, keep an eye
on this loser. I'm gonna get somebody to help out." She jogged out
of the hut and into the brilliant sunlight outdoors.
Spike passed her as he entered with an armload of firewood. "He
twisted his ankle when he fell," Zephyer called to him over her
shoulder. Spike nodded and went in. He stacked the wood on the
hearth, watching Sonic and Tails out of the corner of his eye, and
departed for another load. Great. Tails was playing nursemaid to
Sonic and would never go on a trip now. Sonic couldn't go, even if
he wanted to. Spike loaded his arms with another stack of wood and
thought. He could go alone. His biggest fear was of being caught
and brought back within hours, but Sonic couldn't run, and Slasher
was away. Yes ... Slasher posed the biggest threat to his plans,
with her hunting abilities. But she would be away for at least a
week, she had said. Spike cast a glance at the clear sky. He had
noticed that a glaringly clear day, lately, meant more snow the
next. He could sneak away in a snowstorm and leave no trail, not
even for Slasher's nose.
* * *
That evening a great cloudbank smoked out in the northwest,
and the villagers scurried to and fro, closing shutters, stacking
wood, carrying tools indoors. Sonic hobbled pitifully about on a
crutch, his right foot bound in bandages. He accepted everyone's
pity with, "It's not THAT bad," or, "It's not very painful--Owwww!!"
Once left alone again, he would grin secretly to himself. He would
get a lot of mileage out of this one.
Darkness fell, made ever darker as the stormclouds advanced.
Spike watched it with a small smile. He could actually leave
tonight!
He was startled out of an hour's thoughtful packing by a
sharp rap on his door. Hurriedly, with a touch of panic, Spike
threw everything that was on his bed into his knapsack, zipped it
shut and kicked it under his bed. Then he composed himself, drew a
breath and opened the door.
Zephyer stepped in with a little gasp. "Man it's cold! They
said this storm looks like a three-day blizzard." She pulled
something from under her coat and tossed it on the bed. "You left
your weapon in Tails' hut." Her voice had a note of sarcasm, Spike
noticed as he picked up his crossbow and set it on a shelf.
"Thanks, Zeff," he said as she turned away and extended her
hands to the fire.
"Gee," she said, pretending to ignore his last statement. "I
don't know how you guys can stand the winters here. I should change
my name to Sam McGee." She straightened up and turned to warm her
back. Spike seated himself stiffly on the edge of his bed. Visiting
with Zephyer was the last thing he wanted to do, especially if he
wanted to leave tonight.
The echidna's eyes traced around the room, missing nothing.
Spike unobtrusively placed his feet on the floor to hide his
knapsack from her. "So," she said, "how come you haven't been out
there helping us get ready for the storm?"
"I have been getting ready," Spike said without thinking.
"Uh, I mean, in here. You know."
The coverup wasn't good enough. Zephyer's eyes narrowed.
"WE'VE been getting ready for a storm. What are YOU getting ready
for?"
"The storm," Spike said uncomfortably. It was the truth,
wasn't it?
The echidna gave him an odd look and gazed hard at his feet.
"What are you hiding?"
"Nothing."
"If it's nothing, let me see." Quick as a springing cat she
bounded across the room, crouched and grabbed his knapsack. She
glanced at it and tossed it on his bed. "Where are you going?"
"Nowhere."
"That's a lot of stuff to take nowhere." She folded her
arms with a clink and faced him. "Spike, are you running away?"
"No." He folded his arms, too.
"Don't lie. You're taking your stuff and leaving in the storm,
aren't you?"
Her close guess unnerved him. "Yes, I mean, no! I'm gonna
come back." He was beginning to hate her. "Why can't you keep your
nose out of other people's business?"
"Because you're doing something stupid," she snapped right
back. "Go out in that storm tonight and you'll freeze to death."
"Says who?"
"Says Sally."
"I don't give a hang what she says, I'm going!"
"Why? Where are you going?"
Spike hesitated a fraction of a second. "To find my parents."
Zephyer reacted the way he thought she would and hoped she
wouldn't. "HA! At least my parents are still alive."
"Mine are too alive! At least MINE are on Mobius ... unlike
some folks I know."
That one stopped her cold. She stared at him in grief and
fury, unable to think of a suitable retort. Spike stared back, aware
that he was trembling. After a moment of silence, he sat on his
bead, and she sat on the hearth. "I'm going," he said stubbornly.
"And nobody's gonna stop me."
The fight had gone out of Zephyer. She switched into reasoning
mode. "Why don't you get somebody to go with you?"
"Who would?" Spike said bitterly. "It's a wild goose chase.
I was gonna ask Sonic, but he hurt his ankle, and Tails sure as
heck won't leave Sonic now. Spark has too much SENSE, and I wouldn't
ask Serena. If I asked Slasher, she'd go herself and make me stay,
and come back saying that Mom and Dad weren't there." His voice was
rising. "Of course not! Nobody would know who 'Spike' is, and I've
never told anybody my real name. Mom and Dad never heard my nickname,
so I have to go." He pointed to his chest. "Me! Nobody else! And if
I have to go alone, then I will!" He stood, angry and panting,
furious, facing Zephyer.
Strangely enough, as his temper had heated, hers had cooled.
She gazed at him now, unruffled, clear-eyed, unreadable.
Spike turned away and flopped on his bed. He couldn't read her--
he had never been able to read her. He braced himself for the
logical reply to his tirade. It came. "I'm gonna tell Sally."
He leaped off the bed in a whirl of spines. "No you're not."
Zephyer had risen and stood defiantly facing him. "Yeah?
Who's gonna stop me, huh?"
Spike sprang to the door and locked it. "You're not leaving
until you promise not to tell what I'm doing." He half expected
her to jump him and make him open the door, but she did not. She
shifted her weight to one foot and a crafty look came into her
eyes. "Okay, I'll promise, but on one condition."
"Yeah?"
"I go with you."
The argument lasted another twenty minutes, but was finally
resolved as Spike agreed to take Zephyer along. "I'm bringing my
crossbow," he warned. She smiled, and her left arm morphed into a
laser pistol. "And I'm bringing my gun. So don't get cute."
Spike gave her a list of things to pack--he was fastidious
about such things--and escorted her out of his hut at last. As the
door closed on the chill night air, the porcupine leaned against
it and ran a hand through his spines. He was bringing the one person
in the world he didn't get along with on a secret trip. "You're an
idiot," he told himself as he reopened his sack and looked at the
contents.
* * *
"So how far are we?"
Zephyer was wrapped in two blankets and her sleeping bag with
only her eyes and nose visible. It was dim twilight outside their
tent, but the heavy clouds still hung low and poured snow on the
valley. They had made camp at dawn, too cold to take another step.
Spike, too, was wrapped in blankets and shivering, spikes
rattling slightly. He knew they had not made good time, what with
the darkness and the blowing, disorienting snow. It wouldn't do to
let Zephyer know that, though. "Several miles, at least," he said,
breath hanging on the icy air. "We'll do better once the storm lets
up a little."
Neither said anything for a few moments, and the canvas of
the tent flapped about them. Spike touched one of his spines and
squeezed the water off it. Good, they were finally defrosting. He
glanced at their packs in the corner of the tent, snow-crusted like
a couple of rocks, and thought of food. He thought wistfully of a
cup of something hot, then decided against it. A search party would
be sure of finding campfire remains only a couple miles from the
village. They could do with cold rations for now.
He pulled out a bag of biscuits and a can of beans. Zephyer
emerged from her cocoon. "How much food do we have?"
Spike considered a vague reply, and decided to shoot straight
with her. He was stuck with her as a teammate, after all. "Three
bags of biscuits, three big jars of beans and four little ones,
some potatoes, eight cups of flour and five pounds of bacon."
She looked at him a moment, as if waiting for him to go on,
then said, "That's all?"
Spike nodded. He braced himself for an outburst, but to his
surprise she only shrugged. "I guess we can't expect much with the
village short on food. It might look like a lot in a few more
weeks." She held up her right hand and shook melting show out of
the joints in her metal fingers.
Spike estimated their trip would take two and a half weeks,
but admitted that it was a conservative estimate as he had no idea
what the mountains would be like. He and Zephyer figured out how
much food they should eat a day, then dug into their rations.
"What about water?" Zephyer asked. "Where will we get that?"
Spike looked at her to see if she were serious, then held up
a chunk of snow. "This isn't frozen water, huh?"
She glared at him. "I'm from the desert. Sue me."
After an hour, feeling refreshed, if not warmed, by their
break, they broke camp and set out again. Spike went first to break
trail and watching his compass, and Zephyer followed along behind,
head bowed. Spike knew she disliked the cold, but couldn't say he
liked it himself. This was the kind of cold that would kill you if
you kept still for too long. He wondered what the temperature was
and wished he had brought a thermometer.
The day passed in a haze of snow, black trees and ice. That
night the two struggled to set up the tent and ate another cold
meal, as Spike felt it still wasn't safe to light a fire. Then they
buried themselves in blankets in the tent and fell into dreamless
sleep.
The next day pass much the same as the previous one. The
storm did not abate, and the two struggled north, two puny insects
pitted against the elements. That evening the two were drugged and
sleepy with the cold, and Spike, afraid of hypothermia, lit a fire.
Warm food worked wonders on their spirits, and Spike whittled
arrows for an hour before going to bed.
The third day began the same as the two before, but this time
there was a change. The wind and snow dropped, and the clouds
lightened. By that afternoon a clear winter sun emerged and beamed
down on the white landscape. The air warmed a little, and Spike and
Zephyer, encouraged, covered a good twenty miles that day.
That night the two pitched their tent in the shelter of an
evergreen grove. When Zephyer questioned this, Spike explained that
surely, with the abating of the storm, Slasher would be out
searching. "And after coming this far, I ain't going back," he
concluded with a glint in his eyes.
But they hiked for another two days before anything happened,
and it wasn't Slasher who found them.
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
Slasher did not return to Knothole until the day after the
blizzard, cold, eyes bloodshot, and weary. And even then, Spike and
Zephyer had not been missed. During the storm most of the villagers
simply stayed shut up in their huts. After the storm broke, the
village was so busy cleaning up fallen limbs, chopping firewood and
maintaining roofs, there was no time to count heads.
Slasher, Sally and Sonic met in the community hut the evening
Slasher arrived. Sonic's ankle had healed enough for him to wear
his shoes, but he still used a crutch because it hurt to put his
full weight on it. "I'm glad I didn't break it," Sonic said,
seating himself on the floor. "It's a pain! Here I am, the fastest
dude in the world, reduced to a walk."
Slasher gave him a toothy grin. "From what I've heard, it
hasn't bored you until today."
"Yeah, well ..."
The two turned their attention to Sally, who was sitting
stiffly in a nearby chair. She looked at them and bit her lower lip.
"Slasher, all of the other teams came back with bad reports. Nobody
can spare the food. Did you turn up anything?"
To Sally's and Sonic's surprise, Slasher nodded. "Kind of,"
she said. "The village I went to had a reasonable surplus, and
offered to loan us five hundred pounds of wheat. It's not much, but
it's better than nothing." She trailed off and looked at Sally
hopelessly.
The squirrel drooped. "Slasher, we both know it's not enough.
Not for everyone."
The big raptor lowered her head. "I'm sorry," she murmured.
"I don't know what else to do."
The three sat in silence a few moments, despair weighing
heavily on their spirits. Then the outer door opened and Tails's
voice called, "Anybody seen Spike and Zephyer?"
A search ensued. Their huts were empty, various items (such as
snowshoes) were missing, and nobody could recall seeing either of
them since before the storm.
"I could see Spike striking out on his own," Sonic said to
Slasher as they searched the village, "but taking Zephyer? Those
two are like oil and water! Hey, I know, maybe she saw him leaving
and he killed her and hid her in the snow!"
"Or visa versa," Slasher replied, only half serious. "Or
maybe they didn't go together at all. But where would they go?" The
big raptor paused on the outskirts of the village and gazed into
the quiet woods. Sonic stood beside her on his crutch. Slasher
thought aloud. "They could have thought of someplace that would
have supplies, but why wouldn't they tell someone? Or they could
have run away, but to where? Or ..." Her voice took on a mischievous
tone. " ... maybe they eloped."
That struck Sonic as funny. He whooped and slapped his thigh.
"Spike and Zephyer!" he cackled. "That's a good one!" He laughed for
a full minute and finally straightened up. "Seriously," he said,
wiping his eyes, "what do you think they did?"
Slasher, who had stood and grinned as Sonic had laughed,
sobered and looked at the evening sky. "I don't know what to think.
I don't know either of them well enough to predict what they'd do."
The raptor looked down at the hedgehog, green eyes suddenly tired.
"You get along with Spike pretty well. Has he ever mentioned anything
like this?"
Sonic looked at the snow and searched his memory. "Not about
Operation SQ."
"Is there any reason at all that he would sneak off? Friends,
family?
"All his friends are here, and he lived in Mobitropolis
before ..." Sonic blanched. Something had occurred to him.
Slasher saw his face change and perked up. "What? What is it?"
Sonic stared at her, but it was not at the raptor his eyes were
focused upon. "A long time ago he told me about his parents. They
were partially robotized and escaped ... and he said they ... they
fled to the Robian stronghold."
This time it was Slasher who flinched. "Oh. I didn't know that.
Do you think he might ...?"
Sonic was thinking of the conversation his team had had in the
cabin in Cedarwood. He had told Spike (not seriously, of course) that
the Robians might have supplies. That queer look on the porcupine's
face ... Sonic looked at Slasher and slowly nodded. "I wouldn't put
it past him."
Slasher clenched her teeth and kicked the snow, then looked at
Sonic again. "But why would he take Zephyer, of all people? That's
the most hare-brained part of this whole hare-brained scheme." She
sighed and moved away a step. "Why Zephyer?" she repeated under her
breath.
"Should we go after them?" Sonic asked.
Slasher shrugged her wings pessimistically. "There's not much
chance they survived the storm, but I'll take a look around." Her
white teeth glinted in the twilight. "If they head north like I think
they will, they'll run smack into Lobo and the Wild Wolves."
"Who?"
But the big raptor was already striding away into the village.
Sonic hobbled after her.
* * *
All the next day Slasher winged her way over the countryside,
often with the sharp-eyed Tails on her back, but neither of them saw
a thing. Neither guessed that Spike and Zephyer were already much
further from Knothole than they guessed ...
* * *
The porcupine and echidna were more than sixty miles from home.
After the blizzard, the snow had settled and formed a crust solid
enough to walk on. The two traveled quickly, the Ice Cap mountain
range in the northeast growing taller and wider all the time.
The first night after the storm, Spike noticed that Zephyer was
very irritable. He couldn't say or do anything without having her
snap at him. At first he thought it was merely because she was
overtired, and she would lighten up with a little food and some rest.
But to his surprise, and refused to eat supper and crawled into the
tent before the winter twilight had faded.
The next morning she surprised him by sleeping in. One thing
that had always annoyed him was her fondness for rising early and
smugly awakening him. Sleeping in wasn't like her. He made a lot of
noise poking up the fire and making breakfast, hoping it would wake
her up. It didn't. At last, really worried, he crawled into the tent
to check on her.
The echidna was buried from sight under blankets, as usual.
Spike had to dig around a bit before he finally located her, half
wondering if she had smothered. There she was, and she was still
breathing. "Too bad," said the back of his mind. Her cheeks were
flushed, but the rest of her face was pale as ash. He shook her
shoulder. "Zeff, wake up. Don't pull the 'oh I'm sick' routine."
Her eyes opened. "Huh? Why are you shaking me?" Her eyes were
as glazed as a pair of marbles. She sat up, groaned and made a face.
"Oh, I feel terrible. Did you poison me or something?"
"You didn't eat last night, remember?" Spike was worried, now.
Zephyer didn't look good at all. He touched her forehead--burning
hot. "Zeff, I think you're sick."
She lay down again and closed her eyes. "I'm spinning," she
said drowsily. "Just let me sleep for a few hours. I can go if I
can just rest a little."
Spike left her alone and walked in circles in their camp,
fretting. This was the last thing he needed. Why did she have to get
sick now? They would use up valuable rations waiting around. What if
she didn't get better? What if she died? He had better not think
along those lines. Better think of staying put a couple days. He
gazed at their camp. There wasn't much firewood here, and not much
cover. If they could just go a few miles more, maybe east a ways,
toward the mountains-- He looked up at the mountains, cloaked in fir
trees and snow, perhaps thirty miles away. Distances were hard to
judge. Anyway, they would need a better spot ...
In all his plans, hiding from Slasher figured the most highly.
He never even thought of Zephyer needing medical attention. And he
had no idea of the danger into which he was headed.
Two hours later he awakened Zephyer. She looked worse, but
claimed she felt better. She ate a decent breakfast, helped break
camp, then started out with Spike again.
They had covered barely a mile when her false strength gave
out. She simply crumpled under the weight of her pack and lay in
the snow, exhausted. Spike swore never to trust an obviously sick
person as a judge of their own condition again. He frantically
searched the area for a campsite, located a halfway decent one not
far away, and helped Zephyer limp to it. She was weak as water, and
shivered until her teeth rattled. Spike's mind kept repeating, "Oh
great oh great oh great ..."
But at last they entered a small pine grove Spike had found,
and the porcupine raced about, setting up camp. Zephyer sat in the
snow, her back propped against a tree, fevered eyes half-closed. She
must have felt guilty for falling ill and ruining their trip, for
she tried to help by getting things out of her pack that Spike
would need.
It wasn't long before the echidna was bundled away in the
tent. Before she dozed off, she murmured, "Spike, you'd better get
some firewood and see about food."
"Don't worry," Spike told her with false cheerfulness. "You
get some rest." He pulled a blanket over her, crawled out of the
tent and sat in the snow, head in his hands. Wonderful. Spike, you've
just become a statistic. You should have never brought her in the
first place. We'll be stuck here for days, and phfft, there goes all
your plans, your only chance of ever seeing Mom and Dad again ...
No use sitting there feeling sorry for himself, no matter how
satisfying it was. They needed firewood, and food, if he could
figure out how to get it. Spike dug out his hatchet, hung it through
a belt loop and trudged off to see what he could see.
Fallen branches provided firewood, collected here and there
until he had a sizeable armload. He also stumbled upon a frozen
creek. He thought of ice-fishing and mentally sorted though his gear.
He just might be able to catch a fish ... fish were good to eat, and
he thought he remembered how to clean one.
His hopes had risen considerably as he walked back to camp,
listening to the chickadees in the trees and watching the snow for
footprints. There were rabbit tracks once in a while, but little
else. Spike had no idea that game could be scarce, or that there
might be a reason for it.
He hadn't an inkling until he saw more tracks--quite different
from rabbit tracks. They looked like dog tracks, but if they were,
they had been made by a dog of enormous size. He had passed them by
and walked on several dozen feet before a thought hit him--wolf
tracks? Were there wolves out here? A vision came to him of Zephyer,
lying asleep in the tent, and a dark, furry shape creeping up on
her ... Spike broke into a wild run.
The camp was exactly as he had left it, he was relieved to see.
Panting, he stacked his armload of wood and checked Zephyer. Sound
asleep. Good. Nervous, he lit a fire. Wolves were afraid of fire,
weren't they? As he sat near it, warming his hands, he began to
rationalize. They had seen no signs of wolves so far. They hadn't
heard any. Maybe one wolf had wandered through and left those tracks.
Yeah, that was it. Just a fluke thing. They didn't have anything to
worry about.
Zephyer awoke a little after noon, thirsty. Spike melted some
snow for her. He told her he was going to try a little fishing, and
not to panic if she woke up and found him gone. She nodded, thanked
him for the water and burrowed into the blankets again. Spike took a
ball of string and a piece of bent metal, and set off for the creek.
* * *
The sun sank toward the west. The winter forest lay cold and
silent under its weak rays, sheltering the runaways' campsite from
the air. And in the air, searching with nose and eyes, was Slasher.
She was combing the valley with the persistence of a search
plane, sometimes calling Spike and Zephyer's names. That morning she
had discovered one of their campsites not yet erased by the elements,
and so had sped on, strengthened by hope that they were still alive.
But now and for many hours she had flown in silence, content
to merely look. She knew from scent markers that she was now in
Lobo's territory, and there was a good chance that Spike and Zephyer
were too. To call them, perhaps, was to alert him to their presence.
The big raptor dropped to the earth and folded her wings.
Flight was only possible for a couple hours; then her muscles grew
stiff with cold and she must rest. She lowered her head and began to
sniff, walking in circles to pick up any sort of scent. She passed a
tree and paused to sniff it. She snorted--Lobo's mark. If he learned
she was here, on the ground ...
The raptor's head jerked up. Had she heard a sound ...? The
trees sighed about her in a breeze, and she relaxed. She normally
had no fear of wolves, herself being more than a match for one, but
Lobo and his pack were different. According to rumors and stories
she had heard, Lobo had once been an average Mobian wolf, and had
lived in the suburbs of Mobitropolis. When Robotnik had taken over,
Lobo, who had had a different name back then, fled to the woods. But
while living in seclusion, fear and hatred had worked a change on him.
He had relapsed; that is, returned to animal ways. He ran wild,
hunting for his food, howling at the moon and leading a pack of the
meanest wolves this side of the Dark Mountains. He had become a
thing of legend. Some people said he was a werewolf and would walk
on two legs and speak cordially one moment, then tear out your
throat the next.
Slasher was afraid of him.
She thought perhaps she might tangle with him if her friends
were in danger, but never on her own. Not with Lobo.
She came to a little creek, jumped over it--
A loud jangle, cold jaws clamped around her leg! She
instinctively sprang aside, but was pulled up sharply by the thing
on her foot. She leaped for the sky, tearing the air with claws and
wings, then dropped to the snow, doubled up and kicked at whatever
it was, snarling. After a moment she realized she was not
encountering warm fur, but cold metal. She stopped struggling, and
lifted her panting head to see what had happened.
Locked around her leg, between her foot and her ankle joint,
was a rusted steel trap. A chain led from it down into the snow.
Slasher doubled up again and pried at the trap's jaws. They were
locked. How did they open? She shook her foot and winced; a movement
sent the teeth deeper into her flesh. She lay back and tried to
think of what to do.
The rusted condition of the trap showed that it had laid there
for months, perhaps years, forgotten by the owner. No sense in
waiting for them to come find her. She would have to figure out how
to open the thing herself. It wasn't that hard--a certain mechanism
had to be tripped--
The sun sank into the trees and vanished, and Slasher had not
freed herself. She lay on her side, panting, eyes closed. Her foot
was numb, and her toes had curled up uselessly. The trap was a little
tighter than at first. When it cut off circulation her foot would
freeze, if it hadn't already. She curled up and pulled her foot
into her warm wing. Maybe that would help. She rested her head on
her forepaws. She couldn't wrestle with a rusty trap when she
couldn't see it clearly ... and she needed rest ...
The big raptor dozed, curled like a big lizard in the snow,
wings folded over her body for warmth. The night drew on, the stars
glittered frostily, and the temperature dropped. Slasher began to
shiver and awoke. She was too cold. She got up and walked in little
circles, moving stiffly. No, not hypothermia ... too many people
depend on you. The stupid trap had to open somehow ... She sank down
in the show again and felt the trap with both numbed hands.
Slasher had worked with it for some minutes, jangling softly,
before her instincts flickered. She lifted her head and found herself
staring at several pairs of yellow eyes on the far side of the frozen
stream. Too late to hide the trap and bluff her way out. She turned,
lay in a crouch, and bared her teeth to the roots.
The lead wolf smiled at her, also showing fangs. "Hello, freak,"
he said softly. "It appears that we will feast tonight."
"Perhaps," Slasher replied through her teeth, "but you won't
be alive to enjoy it."
"We'll see about that," said the lead wolf, leaping easily
across the stream. He was seven feet long from nose to tail-tip, and
marked prettily with brown, grey and white. His face and shoulders
were scarred and tattered, and his yellow eyes burned with hungry
ferocity.
Lobo.
His pack slunk after him, twenty-five burly wolves with ribs
showing through their fur. They formed a circle about Slasher and
waited for their leader to make the first move. Lobo and Slasher
smiled at each other.
Then Lobo sprang.
* * *
Spike and Zephyer sat up simultaneously, gasping. Not far
away, up the creek, there came the horrible clamor of a battle. It
was yelps and snarls of wolves, and a hideous yelling, howling sound.
It sounded like all the demons of Hell had been unleashed. "What's
that?" Zephyer asked in cold terror. Spike had no idea and said so,
but the sounds had something canine about them. He thought of the
tracks he had seen earlier and a rock settled in his stomach.
Wolves.
The two sat in perfect silence, listening to the unholy bedlam.
Two creatures seemed locked in a death-struggle. One made all the
wolfish sounds one could think of, but the other was making a set
of sounds that were totally different. "Maybe it's a wildcat," Zephyer
breathed. "A wildcat and wolves." She had a good ear.
"Yeah," Spike replied. "And boy are they close."
There came a shriek, as of a creature death-struck, and the
yelping fell silent a moment. In the air above their camp, Spike and
Zephyer both heard the whooshing sound of huge wings beating the air.
They faded away southward, and the snarls and barks of the wolves
broke out anew.
Spike turned and looked at where he knew Zephyer was in the
darkness. "Zeff, we better get out of here. They'll get us."
"We can't move at night," Zephyer retorted practically. She
felt good enough to argue, at least. "And I'm too sick. Just go
stoke up the fire real bright, and we'll stand guard."
"But I need some sleep!" Spike protested. "I hiked all over
today!"
"Then let me take first watch," said Zephyer with maddening
patience. "I slept all day."
The two took turns watching the rest of the night, and keeping
the fire fed. Once Zephyer saw a pair of eyes reflecting the
firelight from the cover of the trees, but after a few moments they
winked out and did not appear again.
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
A slow dawn pushed back the darkness. The forest lightened,
and birds began to chirp here and there. Zephyer slept, and Spike
nodded at the door of the tent. The wolves had slunk into hiding to
sleep off their meal.
Only one creature walked abroad that morning who feared neither
the elements, nor wolves, nor discovery.
He stood a moment and looked at the trampled, red-stained
snow and the gnawed bones and fur of some luckless creature the
wolves had eaten. It appeared to have been another wolf. He chuckled
quietly to himself and walked on into the forest. He knew exactly
where Spike and Zephyer's camp was, and who both of them were. He
wished them the worst of luck, and thought to himself that maybe he
could help the wolves get them.
But his errand was not with them. It was with Lobo, the
regressed Mobian. The wolf could help him on his mission. Lobo was
nearby, the robot was certain; he detected several life forms not
far off. The wolves had fed, and there was a good chance the pack
leader would be in good humor.
He crunched up to a thick juniper glade and said quietly,
"Lobo? I wish to speak with you." For a moment it was perfectly silent
inside the trees. Then the prickly boughs moved slightly, and Lobo's
shaggy head appeared. The wolf looked the visitor over from head to
toe and growled, "What do you want, robot?"
"I am Robo Knux," said the robot without moving. "I have come
to ask if you have encountered a certain person in your territory."
Lobo's fangs gleamed in a half snarl. "You mean the thrice-
accursed lizard with wings? It escaped us last night and killed one
of my wolves as it went." He licked his chops. "And I'm still hungry."
"Affirmative, oh violent one," said Robo Knux with a hint of
sarcasm. "I believe in return for information given, I in return
give you a full belly?"
Lobo looked at him with his yellow eyes, and the muscles in
his lips and nose twitched. "That is the custom. But yours is ... a
different case." A robot could not be eaten.
Robo Knux nodded smugly, and his green eyes blinked. "Yesss ...
but I could make a kill and give it to you. I do not consume flesh."
The wolf's eyes lit up greedily. He was always hungry,
especially in the winter. "Yes, yes, I would perhaps accept that.
Now, what do you wish to know from me?"
Ah, the good part. Robo Knux took his time about replying. He
examined the claws on both hands for rust before looking Lobo in
the eye. "She is a robot anteater called Kardot. I believe she is
in your territory somewhere. I need your assistance in locating her."
Lobo looked at the robot for a long time without expression,
but with a cunning glint in his eyes. At last he said, "And you
will repay me for showing you her location?"
"Yes," Robo Knux said, mildly relieved. He had begun to
doubt that Lobo knew.
The wolf ran his tongue out in a smile. "Very well. Return
here at sunset and I will escort you personally." The smile
vanished, and the fur on Lobo's neck bristled faintly. "If you do
not repay us, you will die. I have powerful friends." Among them
was the very android the robot sought, but Lobo said nothing about
that.
"Oh, I will repay," Robo Knux said evilly, clenching one hand.
"And you will be pleased, I assure you."
* * *
Spike was busy packing when Zephyer awoke. He saw her peer out
at him and nodded to her. "'Morning. I hope you feel good enough to
hike some."
"We're leaving?" Zephyer asked in disbelief.
Spike nodded and jammed his hatchet into his pack. "Those
wolves have to know where we are, and I don't want to get jumped.
We're going someplace they can't reach us."
"Like where?" Zephyer asked crankily. "Home?"
"Don't be a moron," Spike retorted. "There's a good place a
little further up the mountain. I found it when I was exploring
yesterday."
Zephyer pulled back into the tent to pack her things, and Spike
heard her grumble, "If I have a relapse and die you'll be sorry."
"I'll bet," Spike thought. He should have come alone--so far
she had been nothing but trouble.
Packing was accomplished with many hot words but no bloodshed,
fortunately. Spike was so irritated it never occurred to him that
Zephyer was feeling better to bicker like she was doing. All he cared
about was moving out as quickly as possible.
The two of them hiked without a word through the silent, wintry
woods. Spike half-wished Zephyer would be jumped from behind by a
wolf, but he had no such luck.
They stopped at noon for lunch. Zephyer flopped in the snow and
lay motionless as Spike unearthed their rations. At first he thought
she was only doing it to be ornery, but decided otherwise when he
discovered she had fallen asleep in the few minutes it had taken for
him to uncover their food. She was weaker than he had thought. He
roused her and they ate in silence.
They also moved out in silence. Spike amused himself by thinking
of all the mean things he would do to her once she recovered. When he
tired of that, he wondered about his parents and whether he would be
able to locate the Robian stronghold. All that he knew was that it
was built on a mountain spur, whatever that was, and had a valley
around it. He was hoping it wasn't hidden as well as stories told;
at least so he would have a chance of finding it. Well, if all those
Robians had reached it, then maybe so could he. He also hoped they
weren't as ferocious as the stories told, either.
The land began to slope up into the beginnings of the
foothills, and Spike veered to the left. The rocks had been up this
way ... ah, there it was.
Zephyer looked up and stopped. They were looking into a wide,
shallow gully full of boulders. There were very few trees, and no
cover. "We're camping down there?" she asked in horror. Like Spike,
she had come to value cover. "You've got to be kidding!"
"Oh, just come on," said Spike irritably. "I found a great
place."
Zephyer stared at the back of his head a moment before trudging
after him. Had he finally cracked? They would be sitting ducks down
there. Well, she was too tired and dizzy at the moment to fight him,
so she would wait and see what he had found.
The two made their way down into the stony gully. The snow
was pitted and humped over the rocks, and it was rough going. There
were some very large boulders, too, lying under blankets of snow
like sleeping elephants. Spike went straight to the biggest one of
all, fifteen feet high and twenty long. Zephyer folded her arms.
"Okay, bright boy, what are we supposed to do? Prop it up on end
and camp under it?"
"No, on top of it!" Spike said with a proud gesture to the
top. "No wolf can get up there."
"I hate to break it to you, but neither can we."
"Oh yeah? Watch this."
Spike circled the rock a few steps and came to an area where
the face of the rock was jagged and uneven, as if it had been broken
a century before. He climbed up this, using the rough crags as hand
and footholds, and in a few moments stood atop the boulder. "Easy
as pie," he grinned down at the echidna. She gave him an uneasy
look and said nothing.
She attempted to climb up the way he had, but slipped back
down halfway. "Oh c'mon, it's not that hard," Spike said, looking
down. She looked up at him wearily, shoulders stooped under the
weight of her pack. "I can't do it," she said. "I'm not strong
enough."
"Oh, you wimp," Spike growled. "You're robotized, and you tell
me you're not strong enough? How do you think you've come so far
already? Because you're part robot."
The last thing Spike expected to see was her eyes fill with
tears. She turned her back and sat down in the snow, weeping softly.
"Zeff ...!" Spike exclaimed. "What's wrong?" He climbed down the
rock and crouched beside her.
"I'm a robot!" she cried. "That's all I'm good for!" She
turned to him, eyes flaming through her tears. "Do you know why I
came on this stupid trip? Do you know why?" She was so distraught
Spike could think of nothing to say, and only shook his head.
"It was to prove that I'm good for something. That I'm not just
a freeloader. At home I was good for something, but here I'm just
That Leech Zephyer. I'm not even on this planet for a reason, it
was an accident! Now do you see why I'm ..." her voice broke in a
sob. "Why I'm so unfriendly?" she finished.
Spike opened his mouth to reply, but bit back the words. He
had better keep quiet for a while.
Zephyer cried herself out at last, and fell silent. "Look,"
said Spike, "I'll put our packs up there and help you climb. How's
that?"
She looked at him dully through reddened eyes. Her venomous
attitude had passed with her storm of tears. "Oh Spike, I can make
it. Take my pack and I can make it."
He did, hauling them up one at a time on his back like a giant
snail. Zephyer sat in the snow and watched him, swaying a little with
each breath. When he reached the top for the second time, she rose
wearily and attacked the rock face. It took two attempts, but at
last Spike was helping her up onto the snowy rocky top. She sat down
and hugged her knees to her chest. Spike went about pitching the
tent on the rock's flat top, proud of the safety of their camp,
worrying slightly that Slasher could spot them, and wondering what
had gotten into his companion.
Presently he mustered the courage to ask, "So, why have you
been such a jerk?"
Zephyer said flatly, "Because flint and steel cause sparks."
"You calling me a jerk?"
"I ain't calling you an angel."
"So your attitude has been my fault?" Spike demanded, sensing
another fight coming on. To his surprise, Zephyer said, "No, it was
mine."
"Oh." Feeling as if the wind had gone out of his sails, Spike
busied himself with the tent.
A moment later Zephyer said, "Did you know that I went to
Eagle's Nest before Operation SQ started?"
"No," Spike said without turning. Eagle's Nest was Knothole's
backup village, home of a de-robotizer that had been designed by
Packbell himself. It was also home to the Robians evacuated from
the dying Robotropolis. Most were now de-robotized and living in the
village for the winter.
"Yeah, I went there," Zephyer continued, her voice low and
husky from crying. "I wanted to get rid of this metal. And you know
what happened?"
"No ..."
"It didn't work," she said, her voice taking on a note of
despair. "My metal is a weird type Metal Sonic created. A bio metal.
I'm actually more like an android than a Robian. Anyway, the
de-robotizer doesn't work on it. I'm stuck like this."
And that crack about her being a robot had touched a nerve,
Spike thought with embarrassment. "I'm sorry," he said, sitting back
on his heels and looking at her. "I, um ... I'm sorry."
She shook her head, lifted a hand and let it fall. "It's not
your fault, you didn't know. It's Metal Sonic's fault." She sighed
and rested her head in her hands. "I shouldn't have come," Spike
heard her mutter.
"Look," said Spike, unrolling her sleeping bag and unfolding
blankets, "why don't you get some rest? I'm gonna get some firewood
that'll last us a while."
Her red head came up. "Alone? You're going down there alone?"
"You're too sick to go with me."
"But what about the wolves? Do you have a weapon?"
"Um ..." Spike bit his lip and looked at his pack. He had
brought his crossbow and had lots of arrows, but had decided against
a blaster because of the weight. "Not really, no."
Zephyer leaned forward, eyebrows drawn together. "Spike, what
if you're attacked?"
It wasn't something he enjoyed thinking about. He shrugged.
"Well then ..."
Zephyer pursed her lips, then said, "Aha." Her left arm morphed
into her laser pistol. She unscrewed it with her right hand, and
morphed her left hand back into its original form. "Here," she said,
holding the pistol out to Spike. He took it, not yet recovered from
surprise. "I didn't know your gun came off."
She smiled slightly. "I didn't, either, until Rotor told me.
It has ten rounds, then you recharge the cells by pulling back this
lever. It takes about two minutes to recharge." Her silver hands
waved back and forth, demonstrating.
Spike nodded--it was a basic laser pistol--and stuffed it in
his coat pocket. "How's the battery?"
She shook her head. "I don't know. It should be good for
another year, but if you waste ammo, then ..." She blinked and held
the side of her head. "I don't feel good."
"Then you lay down," Spike said soothingly. "I'll only be gone
an hour, two at the most."
Zephyer crawled into the tent, lay down and closed her eyes.
"Okay," she said without moving. "Be careful."
* * *
Spike was tired. He had worked hard this trip, and had had a lot
less sleep the previous night than he was accustomed to. He had to
wander a good distance from the safety of their camp rock before
finding a few dead branches here and there. Hacking them into useable
sizes was hard work, and before long he found his strength ebbing.
He sat down on a snowy rock to rest, panting clouds into the frosty
air.
Something moved. He turned his head. Nothing. His eyes were
playing tricks on him. He shook his head and rubbed his eyes. He
kept telling Zephyer to rest when HE needed to rest. Well, he could
take a nap when he finished this ... What was that? Something moving
in the trees to his left? He stood up and fumbled Zephyer's pistol
from his pocket. He cocked it and stared at his surroundings, forcing
himself to see clearly. Nothing. The spines on his neck prickled
slightly, and he began to sweat. Either he was loony or he was seeing
something. He stood for a long moment, pistol clutched in both
hands, looking and listening.
Nothing.
After another moment the porcupine lowered his gun. He had
better not waste any more time or he would never get back to the rock
alive.
Several pairs of yellow eyes, hot and hungry, followed Spike's
every move. They were hungry, but they were patient. Eating him now
would be foolish when he could lead them back to his camp.
* * *
Zephyer was awakened by a gentle shaking. She rolled over and
opened her eyes. She sensed it was late afternoon, for the light had
a dim, tired look. Spike was there. When he saw her stir he pulled
out of the tent and said, "Feel any better?"
Zephyer sat up and drew a breath. She felt rested and
comfortably warm. "I think my fever broke," she told him.
"Good," came Spike's voice from outside. "We're going to be
here until you're completely well."
"How come?"
"Take a look."
Zephyer pulled on her coat and crawled out of the tent. The
first thing she saw was the campfire and large stack of wood near
it. "Oh good," she said. "You found some wood." She looked at Spike
and saw him standing at the far end of the rock, her pistol in his
hand, looking at the ground below grimly. Zephyer stood and followed
his gaze.
Seated at a safe distance, tails wrapped around their paws,
were three gray wolves, ears pricked, tongues lolling out like a
couple of happy dogs. But they were far from friendly.
"What are they doing?" Zephyer whispered to Spike.
He turned his head a little and spoke without taking his eyes
from the wolves, "They followed me back to camp. They think they've
found a gourmet feast."
"Can they get up here?" Zephyer asked, fear stabbing through
her heart as she looked toward their jagged 'stairway'.
"I don't think so," Spike said, eyes narrowing, "but I don't
aim to find out. We'll stand guard again tonight."
* * *
Night fell like an inky blanket. Zephyer and Spike took up
positions on either side of the fire, Spike armed with Zephyer's
blaster. Zephyer was idly changing her right hand to a sword blade
and back again. If a wolf actually climbed up on their rock, she was
the close-range backup. She would have preferred to take the gun
herself, but Spike was a better shot from years living in
Robotropolis.
"You could go lay down, if you wanted," Spike said.
Zephyer shook her head. "I'm okay. I wanted to stay up for a
while."
The fire crackled, throwing sparks into the black sky. Zephyer
stared into it, slightly hypnotized, while Spike peered around into
the darkness every few minutes.
Abruptly Zephyer said, "I wish Slasher were here."
Spike jumped and looked at her. "Huh? Why?"
Zephyer rested her chin in one hand, still looking at the
fire. "Because if they attack us, I don't think we could fend them
off."
"What makes you think Slasher could?"
"Well, if she couldn't fight, then at least she could rescue
us." Zephyer fell silent, but raised her eyes to the night sky. She
was afraid--afraid of their solitude and isolation, afraid of the
winter weather, afraid. She glanced at Spike. He had set the pistol
on his knee and was pressing his fingertips together, gazing into
the fire. His face had a hard, yet troubled expression. "I made him
mad," she thought. "I shouldn't have mentioned Slasher." She drew
her knees to her chest and rested her chin on them miserably. "I'm
such a failure at this ... I should have never come."
She looked up again to see the porcupine gazing at her. He gave
a heavy sigh and reached one hand into his coat. He pulled out
something and held it by a string, dangling and shining in the
firelight. "What is that?" Zephyer asked, sitting upright in
surprise. He tossed it across the fire. She caught it and examined
at it. "Spike ... is this Sonic's whistle?" He nodded. Zephyer
stared at it, glistening in her hand, as her surprise turned to
disgust. "You stole it?" Again he nodded. She glared at him. "This
isn't yours! Why'd you take it?" She threw it back to him, wanting
to get it away from her.
Spike caught it and put it back in his coat. "A safeguard,"
he said with a shrug. "If we get in such trouble that it's a choice
between death and letting Slasher find us, then ..."
"But you stole it!" Zephyer exclaimed, eyes flashing in
indignation. "You should have brought a communicator or something,
something of yours!"
There was no remorse in Spike's eyes. "Sonic won't mind."
"Oh yeah? He wears that thing everywhere. How would you feel
if he took your crossbow, huh?"
Spike shrugged and didn't answer, for at that moment a lonely
howl rose from the woods to their left. At the same time, an
answering chorus rose from a pack sitting in a ring around their
rock chimed in. The two on the rock jumped and looked toward the
ground. Eyes shimmering in the dark, stared back at them.
Lobo's pack had arrived for dinner.
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
Lobo himself was not in the pack. He was a dozen miles away,
loping easily along a mountain ridge, Robo Knux a shadow with green
eyes floating behind him. The robot heard the pack howl, but he did
not understand them. Lobo did, however, and stopped a moment to
look back. He gave a growly chuckle from the depths of his throat,
then turned and continued on his way.
"What is it?" Robo Knux inquired.
"The pack," said Lobo shortly. He had no reason to explain
his business to strangers, particularly strangers whom he could not
harm, like robots. Robo Knux did not speak again, and the two
journeyed on through the night, a hunting wolf and a fearsome robot.
Presently the wolf turned aside and trotted down the backside
of a ridge into a thick mat of trees. Robo Knux was forced to
follow him on foot, as the trees left no room for flying. Lobo
passed through the trees with hardly a rustle, the robot with
scarcely more. The two were vastly different creatures, but both
knew the value of moving quietly in the woods.
Lobo halted. Robo Knux moved up beside him and stood still.
"Just ahead there, in the clearing," growled Lobo, although the
robot was already scanning it. "That is her camp. I will expect
payment within two weeks." With that the wolf melted away into the
shadows. Robo Knux nodded and moved forward silently. The wolf had
played true; his sensors detected a cyber organism in the clearing
beyond. Robo Knux considered breaking his bargain, but decided
against it. Lobo could be a valuable ally in the years to come.
Kardot was huddled near a puny campfire for warmth, clawed
hands extended toward the blaze. Robo Knux approached her from
behind, and so had time to look her over before revealing his
presence. She did not appear to be an android. She appeared to need
food and warmth as much as Spike and Zephyer did, but his sensors
detected the machinery inside her hull. She was as much of a robot
as he was. He stepped toward her and said, "Greetings."
Kardot whirled and stared at him with the surprise of a
hunted animal upon discovery. "What? Who are you? What do you want?"
He lifted a hand, palm outward. "I mean you no harm. I am
Mecha bot four."
The anteater sneered. "I know who you are. You're one of
Robotnik's inferior lackeys."
Robo Knux stood perfectly still, manually closing down the
reactionary software that said KILL HER!! "Some could call me that,"
he purred as if totally calm, "although I have been on my own for
some time now. I would prefer it if you call me Robo Knux."
Kardot stiffened. "Knux, as in Knuckles?"
"Affirmative."
The anteater leaped to her feet, at the same time drawing a
foot-long dagger from somewhere on her person. She sprang at the
robot like a cat, back arched, teeth bared.
Robo Knux could have laughed, but he did not. He solemnly
waited until she was upon him, then decked her with a metal palm to
the face. She fell to the snow, but was up again like lighting. "I
am an assassin robot," he told her coolly as she stood panting,
holding her face. "The only reason I haven't killed you already is
because Mecha bot two wants you alive and unharmed."
"Oh yeah?" she snapped, lifting her dagger defensively. "What
do you want me for, huh? You gonna take me to prison or something?"
"No," said Robo Knux, folding his broad arms. She certainly
didn't act like an android. "We want you for your schematics. Metal
Sonic needs your technology to build a new robot."
"Oh, so you're gonna take me apart," she said, flipping her
orange forelock out of her face. He saw her lower lip was bleeding--
really bleeding. "Well, guess what. I'd rather die than let an idiot
disassemble me."
At this point something went queer in Robo Knux's head. He
had reprogrammed and patched himself so much that he was more
complex than even he knew. As he stood there, looking at Kardot and
seeing her afraid but defiant, a weakling android with no weapon
systems, he felt sorry for her. Taking him on with only a dagger--!
Poor brave fool. "We will not disassemble you," said the robot. "We
mean only to scan your systems. You will remain unharmed." He
scanned her systems himself and located her tracking device. That liar
Mecha--it was set to a different frequency than the one the Mecha
bots used. No wonder he had been unable to locate her.
"You will accompany me south at 0500 hours," he told her as
she reseated herself near the fire.
She glared up at him, the firelight casting a golden light on
her finely-furred face. "I will accompany you nowhere. I have things
to do."
Again, Robo Knux could have laughed. A pitiful android with
things to do. He seated himself beside her and sat gazing into the
darkness over the fire, as the fire itself would blind his visual
sensors. Androids were naturally weak; something between a robot
and an organism, but at the same time were neither. He thought
smugly of killing Packbell. Androids were remarkably inferior ... He
fixed his green eyes on Kardot's face and changed his mind. Whoever
had built her had been a remarkable inventor. And there was that
strange idea again ... pity and admiration of her spunk. The robot
had some basic emotion chips he had picked up somewhere, but they
had never worked before. And so he had no idea what his current
feelings toward Kardot might lead to.
"Allow me to accompany you on your errand," the robot said to
the android. "It would be a shame to lose you."
She gave him a savage look and seemed about to reply in the
negative, but appeared to change her mind. "All right," she said with
a little sniff. "But don't bore me with your stuffy Robotropolis wit."
* * *
Spike and Zephyer still sat on the snowy boulder's top, feeding
the fire from time to time, and watching the wolves. The beasts were
sitting on their tails in a wide ring, staring hungrily up at their
marooned quarry. Several wolves had tried to climb the boulder, but
either fell back or were shot by Spike. After two wolves had perished,
the pack retreated to a more respectful distance to watch and drool
in the snow.
The porcupine and echidna had grown confident that the wolves
could not reach them, and were arguing in low tones about Sonic's
whistle. The longer Zephyer thought about it the more it ate at her
and the angrier she became. A horror of stealing had been pounded
into her since she had been very young, and she could not comprehend
how Spike could take something without feeling guilty. The more she
hammered at Spike, the more he wished he had not taken it to start
with, and the more annoyed he grew with her.
The two were distracted from their strife by a voice saying,
"Hello, friends."
A look around brought to view a lone wolf seated near the foot
of their rock, gazing up at them fearlessly. He was much bigger than
the other wolves, and appeared better fed.
"Uh, hi," said Spike. "Who are you?"
"Lobo," the wolf said sweetly. "It appears you have a secure
perch up there."
"You bet," Spike said, sneaking a glance at Zephyer. She was
biting her lip uneasily and watching Lobo. The wolf smiled at them
by running out his tongue. It made him look like a good-natured dog.
"I'd advise you not to come down from there. Those wolves are very
mean, and they are very hungry."
Spike looked at Zephyer again to see her hands moving
stealthily. She was packing snow into hard balls, holding them out
to the fire to melt them a bit, then setting them out in the snow
to freeze. She looked at Spike and winked. Spike winked back. They
were going to send Lobo the message that they were not as gullible
as he thought they were. Spike returned his attention to the wolf
as Lobo said, less graciously, "Do you know who I am, Mobian?"
"You just told me," Spike said cheekily. "Low-life."
"I am Lobo," the wolf growled. "And I was born a Mobian."
With that, he stood up on two legs.
The charge was eerie. Spike and Zephyer had grown used to
the four-legged wolf form, and to see one suddenly take on the
shape of a two-legged Mobian wolf was a shock to the eye and mind.
Lobo stood before them, a tall, straight wolf in unkempt, shaggy
fur. The two were struck with the fear that now he could climb
their rock and get them.
Zephyer, afraid but defiant nonetheless, let fly an ice ball.
It struck Lobo full in the face, and in that moment his Mobian
charade was ruined. He staggered backward, unaccustomed to two legs
as he was, dropped to all fours and wiped the snow from his eyes.
The next instant, furious, the wolf sprang at their rock. The pack,
excited by his fury, followed suit.
Angry, starved wolves could jump quite a distance, and some
came dangerously close to scrambling up on the boulder. Spike shot
wolves right and left, and Zephyer dashed to and fro, stabbing paws
and howling jaws.
The attack did not last long--the resistance was too strong.
The wolfpack retreated into the rocks about the area to lick their
wounds, and silence descended upon the battlefield.
Spike and Zephyer had escaped without a scratch. Spike,
charged with adrenaline and a sense of superiority, assured the
weary Zephyer that he could stand guard. And guard he did, long
into the night after his companion was asleep. He was finally
driven into shelter by the biting cold that strengthened every hour
without the sun.
The two remained camped on the boulder for three days while
Zephyer regained her strength. Every evening the wolves returned
hopefully to wait and watch in a wide, scraggly circle, Lobo among
them. The pack leader always had something to say to his would-be
meal, and it was always hateful. Spike and Zephyer only laughed at
him, although uneasily. The two harbored a silent fear that one
night he would climb their rock and take them unawares.
Early one morning, after the wolves had departed, Spike and
Zephyer packed up and left.
Spike set a course for the mountains, as straight as he
could make it. Zephyer followed him in silence, looking and listening
for wolves. When she was not gazing at the forest, she was studying
the forbidding mountain wall above them. Jagged with rock,
blanketed with snow, lined with coniferous forest, the Ice Cap
range frowned upon the valley, daring them to come near. Zephyer
had never seen mountains so majestic and terrible, and somehow
sensed their danger, although she had never heard the stories. She
was quickly updated on these by Spike, who liked to ward off
boredom with talk. He told her of mountain climbing teams, of whom
maybe one person was found months later where they had somehow died.
He told her of the notorious avalanche of '21 that had buried a
village and killed all the inhabitants. He told her about Sonic and
Tails' uncovering of Robotnik's secret base, built inside a
glacier, years ago, and of how the glacier had been slowly
collapsing in on itself.
With each story, Zephyer's reluctance to enter the mountains
grew. She had never imagined the dangers of a snowy wilderness, and
began to wonder if backing out was an option. Then, as they made
camp that night, Spike mentioned in passing that she was lucky
she had had a family, and didn't remember seeing it torn apart by
a military coup. Zephyer's fears were immediately overcome by
compassion for Spike, and she resolved to go on, no matter what
the cost.
* * *
A slow week passed. Supplies dwindled slowly, both in Knothole
and in the intrepid explorers' packs. Spike and Zephyer were liberal
in their use of the laser pistol, and the trailing wolf pack kept to
a respectful distance. Spike always aimed specifically for Lobo, but
the beast managed to escape harm each time.
As the two worked their way up, up into the mountain country,
the wolves gradually lost interest. Scanty as hunting was in the
valley, it was a feast compared to the mountains, and the travellers
had proved armed and fearless.
The last night of that week, the two found themselves making
camp without a hungry audience. As they ate a meagre supper, Zephyer
cocked her head and yawned. "Air pressure's dropping," she commented.
"There's another blizzard coming."
"How do you know?" Spike asked with his mouth full.
Zephyer waved a hand in the vicinity of her ears. "I've got
sensitive ears. When the air pressure changes, like before a storm,
I can feel it. Do you think we'll be sheltered enough here?"
The two looked up at the trees and large boulder they had
camped against. "We're on the south side of that rock," said Spike,
pointing with his spoon. "That should break the wind some."
Zephyer shrugged. "If you say so."
Neither had ever seen a mountain snowstorm.
The storm struck shortly before dawn with awesome fury. The
snow was lashed into a driving, biting cloud, the wind tore the
white from the trees and re-flocked them, and the temperature
plummeted. Spike and Zephyer saw their danger at once; their camp
was too exposed. If they did not find a better shelter, they would
freeze to death by noon. But the danger of getting separated and
lost in the blinding snow was just as great.
The two were camped just below a rocky ridge. They decided to
work their way along it and look for a sheltered nook of some sort
they would camp in. Spike thoughtfully tied a rope around his waist
and had Zephyer tie the other end around her own, so as to keep from
becoming separated.
Striking out into the blizzard was perhaps one of the most
foolish things they two had ever attempted, but good came of it.
The two had walked for ten minutes, blinded by the driving snow,
deafened by the wind and feeling the cold sink its teeth into their
bones. Zephyer chanced to walk a little out of the way to avoid a
jagged chunk of rock, and without warning fell through a hole in
the snow and vanished. The jolt yanked Spike from his feet and
dragged him several yards. He stood, followed the rope by touch and
found the black hole Zephyer had made. "Zeff!" he yelled into it.
"Come on in!" he heard her yell back, her voice muffled.
"I'm okay, it's a cave!"
Spike sat down and slid into the hole.
It was a drop of three feet. Spike landed and found himself
in a low-ceilinged cave. It was about twenty feet long by six feet
wide, and the floor was carpeted with dead leaves that crackled
under their feet. The walls and ceiling were solid rock. The air
was much warmer there than outside in the killing wind. "Zeff,
you're a genius!" Spike exclaimed with gratitude.
"No, I'm just a klutz," she replied, "and it's a good thing,
too."
It was a perfect shelter. They made camp without setting up
the tent--they wouldn't need it--and sat down to wait out the storm.
One of the first things they thought of was to keep the
entry open to let in air. Zephyer accomplished this by crawling to
the entrance and standing up. "Cold out there," she said as she
returned. "Our chances are a lot better now." She sat down and
crossed her legs. Time to start some kind of conversation to help
pass the time. She looked at Spike and said, "Where did you get
your nickname?" It had been nagging at her for quite some time.
Spike shrugged. "Oh, I donno. I think one of the SWAT-bots
called me that when I lived in Robotropolis, and I sorta used it."
He gave Zephyer a sidelong look. "Where'd you get YOUR nickname?"
"Zephyer is my real name," said the echidna indignantly.
"Zephyer Clamata Winstrom."
"Clamata? Isn't that a flower or something?"
"No, no," Zephyer said with a shake of her head. "A clamata
is a cloud formation. You usually see them in supercell
thunderstorms. A zephyr is a breeze. Most of us echidnas were named
for a weather pattern--it's a custom."
"Oh," said Spike, feeling dull and uneducated. "Why isn't
Knuckles named after a cloud?"
"Because he's a Mobian echidna," said Zephyer sensibly.
"Besides, he was named for his claws."
"Do girl echidnas have claws on their knuckles?"
Zephyer held up a smooth metal hand, looked at it and put it
down. "Not usually. It's a genetic thing." It was her turn to look
sidelong at Spike. "What's YOUR real name?"
Spike looked at the entrance. "I think snow's getting in."
"Yeah, change the subject," Zephyer said sarcastically, but
not unkindly. "C'mon, it can't be worse than Spark's real name."
The porcupine drew a breath, let it out and rested his chin
in his palm. "Douglas," he muttered. "Douglas Quill."
"That's not embarrassing," said Zephyer, leaning back. "I
always thought you looked like a Doug."
He looked at her sharply to see if she were mocking him and
decided she wasn't. "I'd rather you call me Spike," he told her.
"That's what I've gotten used to."
The two fell silent for a while and listened to the wind howl
outside the cave mouth. Zephyer remembered that the last storm had
lasted for three days, and checked their rations. "Spike," she
announced, "we're almost out of food. We have about two day's
worth left."
She handed the knapsack to Spike, who looked inside and
frowned. "We could stretch it to four," he said. He looked up at
Zephyer and saw she was biting her lip. "What's wrong?"
"Spike," she said slowly, "how are we supposed to get home?
Or get anywhere? The stronghold could be a hundred miles from here ..."
There was silence a moment. Spike pulled out Sonic's whistle
and twirled it by its string. "We'll call Slasher. She can fly us
out."
Zephyer only looked at him and said nothing. She had a feeling
that Spike would never use the whistle, for using it would be
admitting defeat. Spike was too proud to admit defeat. A new thought
came to her. "What'll we do if we DO find the stronghold? Are you
going to live there?"
Spike shrugged. "I don't know. Maybe. It depends." He returned
Sonic's whistle to his inner coat pocket.
Zephyer shook her head, crawled to her sleeping bag and lay
down. They were doomed, that was what they were. Doomed to starve
in these frozen mountains ...
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
The day passed slowly, and the blue light in the cave entrance
faded. The two argued over whether or not to light a fire, and Spike
won by pointing out that a fire would burn all the oxygen if the
entrance froze over during the night, and they would suffocate in
their sleep. Zephyer relented at last, although unwillingly; she
missed the warmth.
Breaking the entrance in the morning was rather difficult. The
snow had drifted four feet thick over it, and Zephyer had to paw and
hack at the crust before finally breaking through. Outside the frigid
wind continued to blow. Another day of crawling about on all fours in
the little cave.
The day crept drearily by. Spike and Zephyer mostly lay on their
sleeping bags, as the roof was too low to allow them to stand up,
bored stiff. The solid rock above them muted all outside sound, and
the two tried to break the silence by talking.
But by and by talking faded away into silence, and their fears
grew and fed on it. Zephyer gazed at the dim ceiling and worried about
getting back to Knothole, about finding food ... if they didn't find
food up here, then the village would starve down there. What a cheerful
thought. Despair drew near, but Zephyer pushed it away. They could
survive. Once on XR-7, when the agricultural domes had been damaged,
the echidna clan had been in danger of starvation. They had rationed,
worked hard, and pulled through. But XR-7 had no seasons ... food
production was possible year round. So maybe here on Mobius, their
situation was more serious ... she was back again at Operation SQ.
There was no way out of the loop.
Spike's fears about the food situation were much the same as
his companion's, but they were coupled with another; claustrophobia.
Stuck in this hole, not even able to stand up--what if the cave
collapsed and crushed them? What if they were snowed in? He began to
gasp and pant.
Presently Zephyer asked him what was wrong, and he moaned that
the walls were closing in. "Don't think about it," she told him.
"Close your eyes, don't look, and imagine you're somewhere else."
Spike shut his eyes and said, "But what should I think of?
Robotropolis?"
"No ... how about I tell you about home, and you picture it?"
"Okay," Spike replied, trying not to think of the six feet of
rock between himself and open air. He expected her to talk about
Knothole, and was surprised when she began to tell of her home planet.
She painted a picture of a dry, desert world carved into canyons and
eerie formations by the continually blowing wind. The sky was orange,
the rocks were red, yellow and pink, and the hardy echidnas lived
underground in spacious caverns they dug themselves. Underground
there was water and pale fungi that grew without the sun. Above
ground, in the dangerous, windy desert that could kill with its
broiling heat, was the group of fragile plastic and glass agricultural
domes where the echidnas raised food. The crops they grew had been
brought to them, one seed at a time, by the Swifts, enormous swallow-
like birds that landed only to nest, eating and sleeping on the wing.
The echidnas had formed an alliance with them, and each species helped
the other whenever they could.
It helped Spike forget his claustrophobia for the moment, and
after a while, lying with eyes closed, he dozed off. Zephyer sat
alone in the dimness for a long time, thinking of that other world
she had lost.
* * *
Zephyer awoke with a start. Something had changed. Spike lay
nearby, curled in his bag, snoring. What day was it? The third? The
fourth? She felt as if she had been asleep an abnormally long time.
She sat where she was for a few minutes before she at last realized
what was different. The howl of the wind was gone. Their cave was as
quiet as a tomb, and nearly as dark.
She crawled to the entrance and looked at it in dismay. Their
little tunnel to the surface had collapsed, and the top was sealed
over. "Oh great," she muttered.
A few moments later Zephyer and a sleepy Spike were huddled at
the entrance. "Too bad you're not a guy or you could dig us out,"
said Spike.
"Help yourself, mister macho male," Zephyer snapped, eyes
flashing. "It's packed solid. Just get your snow shovel and we'll be
out in no time."
"Sorry, sheesh," said Spike, rolling his eyes. "Can you dig
with your sword?"
"I can try." The echidna morphed her arm into a blade and
stabbed into the icy crust above them. After a moment she sank back,
panting. "It's solid ice. We'd need to melt it."
"Hey, I know!" said Spike, eyes brightening. "Shoot your laser
into it! That should soften it right up."
The lasers punched tiny, hot holes in the ice, and Zephyer was
able to make headway. When she tired, she gave Spike her pistol, and
he dug with his hands. They took turns, slowly widening their
collapsed tunnel and working up through the new crust. The tunnel
stretched six feet, seven feet--and they had not reached the surface.
"Maybe there was an avalanche," Zephyer worried.
Eight feet and the snow began to soften. Nine feet, and Spike's
hands broke through into blinding sunlight and crisp fresh air.
The two clambered out into the icy upper world and stood
breathing the air and blinking in the sun like two moles. They had
not realized how stuffy their lair had grown, or how close they had
actually come to suffocation.
"I think your batteries are shot," Spike said, handing Zephyer's
pistol back to her.
"We're down to your crossbow, now," Zephyer replied, screwing
the gun in place.
The attack was ingeniously planned. The two never saw it coming,
blinded as they were by the sun and snow after living in darkness for
so long. The wolf pack attacked in deadly silence. Spike was struck
from behind by a hairy body, hot jaws ravening for the back of his
neck. Zephyer was thrown down, too, but she fought back in terror,
her sword cutting into the wolf above her. It leaped away with a
snarl, and she sat up to see four wolves worrying Spike, all but
hiding him from view. Zephyer plowed into them with a scream, ignoring
the snapping teeth that closed on her arms and legs; they could rip
her clothes, but they couldn't penetrate her armor. She flung the
wolves off and Spike leaped to his feet. He was bleeding in a dozen
places and was terribly frightened. "Get to the cave!" Zephyer yelled,
whirling to face another attack. She didn't see if he did, for Lobo
himself was there, yellow eyes like raging fire, red jaws open. He
knocked her down by sheer weight and slashed at her throat, unprotected
by metal. An upflung arm saved her from instant death, and Zephyer
ran her sword arm clumsily against his chest. It was a glancing blow,
but Lobo sprang away instinctively. Zephyer had made it to her knees
when another wolf pounced from behind. She shrieked for help, then
her face was buried in the snow.
There was a twang, a hollow thud as something struck the wolf
above her. The beast gave a series of yelps, leaped away and fell to
the snow with one of Spike's arrows in its side. Two wolves leaped
for the porcupine. One got an arrow in the throat, and the other
received a facefull of spines from Spike's lashing tail. The first
fell dead and the other fled, howling in pain.
A hand hauled Zephyer to her feet. She looked up, expecting to
see Spike, and instead saw only a pair of glimmering digital eyes.
Her heart skipped several beats in a row. "You," she whispered.
"Yes," the robot whispered back. "I didn't get a chance to kill
you last time. This time I will."
"Spike!" Zephyer screamed, flinging herself away from Robo
Knux. His hand remained locked around her arm. Spike gasped. Robo
Knux had been presumed dead after misusing Sonic's emerald belt.
Wooden arrows would do no good against a metal robot.
"Lobo, you may attack Spike now," said the crimson robot. "I
will kill the girl. She is mostly metal, anyway." Then to Zephyer
he said conversationally, "Lobo gave me some valuable information,
and in return I must give him food. He wanted you two. Now, should
I tear your limbs off before or after I kill you?" His hand twisted
her arm a fraction, and she knew he could do it. Easily.
"Spike, the whistle!" Zephyer cried. Spike, backing away from
Lobo, whipped the whistle out and blew it. He didn't know the
signals, but he could blow it.
* * *
Slasher sat up with a jerk, then groaned and sank back.
"What's wrong, Slash?" Sonic asked from his seat nearby.
The big raptor's foot was in a cast, and she sported bandages
all over. Fighting a pack of wolves with a chained foot was
hazardous to one's health, even if the chain broke in the heat of
battle. "The whistle," Slasher muttered feverishly. "They blew the
whistle." She tried again to get up, but hadn't the strength. She
lay limp on her bed and closed her green eyes. "They need me," she
whispered.
Sonic only shook his head. The big raptor's fever had made her
speak nonsense before, and he put this down as nonsense, too.
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
The Ice Cap range sheltered many secrets, and a pair of Freedom
Fighters slaughtered by a wolf pack and a Mecha bot would have been
but one more added to its tally. It was fortunate that not only
Slasher could hear that whistle.
"Did you hear that?"
"It sounded like a dog whistle."
"I couldn't have heard it without my sensors. Sounds like
somebody's in trouble."
"Lobo's been tracking something ever since the snowstorm quit.
Look, there's the pack down there."
"Good grief, what's that with them?"
"It's a Mecha bot. Two Mobians? Looks like we're too late."
The wolves and Robo Knux looked up to see three figures
bearing down upon them at a run; the parts of their bodies not covered
by warm clothing glittered metallically. "The mutants!" Lobo howled
to his pack. "Flee!" The wolves scattered. Robo Knux alone stood his
ground. He was not afraid of a bunch of Robians. At least, he was not
afraid until he realized his rocket fuel had frozen and his weapon
systems were off-line. He glided away after the wolves and vanished
into the trees.
"I told you we were too late," said a rabbit. His left arm was
robotized, and he had metal plates embedded in his skin in various
places beneath his clothes. A robotized fox with one arm still flesh
walked up to the two figures lying crumpled and torn in the snow.
"This is a new one," he said in a synthesized voice. "The girl was a
Robian and the other one wasn't. Look Jim, it's a porcupine."
Jim was a porcupine, too. Half his face was robotized, and his
left arm and leg were, too, although he wore clothing over them. He
knelt next to the robotized echidna and rolled her over. "Alive," he
announced. "Bern, pick her up." The fox bent over the echidna, and
Jim moved to the porcupine. The back of the newcomer's head and neck
and been bitten badly, and his right arm had been broken in three
places by Lobo's jaws. "This one's alive, too," said Jim, "though he's
in sorry shape. We'll take him back, too."
As the Robian slid his arms under the wounded porcupine's body,
Spike's eyes opened. He looked up at the half-robot half-Mobian face
above him, and recognized it. "Dad," he murmured.
"Awake, are we?" said the Robian, lifting him in his arms.
"Dad, it's me," said Spike a little louder. "Dad ... it's
Douglas."
Jim looked down at the boy in his arms, and saw for the first
time a familiar face that had grown with the years. "Doug? Is ... is
that you?"
The rabbit commented from several feet away, "I thought your
kids had been robotized."
"No," Spike murmured, beginning to faint. "I've been with the
Freedom Fighters ..."
The two Robians gazed at their companion. Jim, usually so
collected and businesslike, was totally floored. He stared at his
son's face with so many emotions he didn't know what he felt.
"Jim," said Bern the fox, "we'd better get them back to base
or they'll die."
"Right," said Jim, turning his head so they wouldn't see the
tears in his good eye. "Activate rockets."
The feet of all three Robians opened up, ignited, and blasted
them skyward at ninety miles an hour.
* * *
Zephyer opened her eyes and lay staring up at the ceiling. She
was warm and comfortable, except for a throbbing pain on the side of
her head. "I must be in Knothole," she thought dreamily. Robo Knux
and the wolves floated through her head, the remnants of a nightmare
half remembered. It felt so good to be warm ...
Footsteps. She turned her head, expecting to see Sally, and
instead saw a female goat with a robot torso and arms carrying a tray.
"Hello, honey," said the goat. "I'm Sheila. How's your head?"
Startled, Zephyer gazed at the gleaming metal and raised a hand
to her head. There was a bandage wrapped around her head, and her
skull was sensitive to touch.
"The Mecha bot put some nice scratches on you," said Sheila,
setting a bottle of pills and a cup of water on the bedside table.
"Drink this, honey. It'll help you perk up." She handed Zephyer a cup
of dark liquid. Zephyer drank it obediently--it tasted like strong
herbal tea.
"Where are we?" Zephyer asked, handing the cup back. "And what
happened?"
Sheila sat down on the edge of the bed. "This is Stonecleft, the
Robian stronghold. The men were out on a scouting mission to learn of
Lobo's movements and came upon the wolf pack as it was getting ready
to rip you and your friend to pieces."
"Oh my gosh, Spike!" Zephyer exclaimed, sitting up suddenly.
"Where is he?"
"Surgery," Sheila said soothingly. "Don't worry, he'll be all
right. They're setting his arm."
Zephyer sank back against the pillow. "Robo Knux held me so I
couldn't help him. Is he badly hurt?"
"He'll make it," Sheila said, looking away. "Now, I need to ask
you some questions." She paused and looked at the echidna. Zephyer
nodded, and the nurse pulled out a notepad and pencil.
They were the standard questions about background, political
connections and personal information. Zephyer guessed it was to
ascertain she would not give them away. Later she found out that it
was only because of her the Robians had allowed her and Spike to
pass their gates. Being partially robotized had its advantages.
"But," she asked, "did Spike find his family? He was hoping to find
them ..."
Sheila gave her an odd look, and her brown eyes filled with
tears.
"What? Did they die?"
The goat pulled out a handkerchief and wiped her eyes. "Oh no,
nothing like that. Douglas's father was one of the men in the scout
group," Sheila sniffed. "He brought his baby in, called his wife--I
never saw anything so sweet in my life. Why, Mrs. Quill just cried
right out loud. They wanted to hold him longer, but they had to rush
him to surgery to save his arm. They thought he had been killed or
robotized, see. Their other son fell to the robots."
"Other son?" Zephyer exclaimed. "You mean he has a brother?"
"Had, Miss Zephyer. The military robots killed him. The Quills
thought they had lost both sons ... until Douglas shows up right on
our doorstep." The goat wiped her eyes again, quite overcome.
Zephyer felt an involuntary lump in her throat at the thought
of Spike's family reunion, and how how his parents must have felt.
Sheila stood up. "Well Miss Zephyer, I'll leave you to get
some rest. The leaders want to interview you later."
Zephyer waved goodbye to the nurse, and lay back against the
pillows. Perhaps she would get to see Spike when he came out of
surgery.
* * *
It was a full twenty-four hours before Zephyer was allowed to
see Spike. One reason was that he was recovering from his injuries
and operation, and the other was because the leaders wanted to keep
the newcomers separated until they had been questioned.
Zephyer was questioned first, as she was in the best physical
condition of the two. She was led through the cold, stone halls and
rooms by a rat who was mostly robotized. The Robians they passed
didn't look at them, and all seemed anxious or unhappy about
something. Zephyer felt sorry for them. They didn't know that a
derobotizer existed. She had it all figured out; she would tell them
about the derobotizer in Knothole, and in return the Robians would
give them the supplies they needed. It was so perfect she was
confident the Robians wouldn't refuse, and marched with head up into
the conference hall.
Whatever the stronghold had been originally, it had been
gigantic. The echidna entered a room the size of a small cathedral
with large windows looking west and south. There was a huge table in
the center of the room, obviously made for seating hundreds of people.
But only three figures were seated there, and they rose as she
entered. One was Bern the fox, one was a bobcat and one was a
predatory bird of some kind.
"Sit down," said the bobcat, motioning to a chair near them.
"I'm Daniel, this is Bern and this is Wolfgang. Please make yourself
comfortable."
Zephyer took her assigned seat, hoping her face didn't show how
her heart had jumped at the word 'wolf'.
The interrogation was studied and particular. The Robians
wanted to know how, when and by whom she had been robotized. She
learned later than Robian spies had come to them who acted friendly,
but in reality were simply programmed robots. On hearing she had been
an experiment by Metal Sonic, they grew very serious, almost afraid.
The questioning was extended from 30 minutes to two hours, and
Zephyer's hands and feet grew cold, and her metal joints creaked.
She was relieved when at last they seemed to relax and began
to question her about her journey to the fortress. She told them
that not only had Spike been looking for his parents, but Knothole
village had lost nearly all its food supplies and needed additional
supplies to survive the winter. She added that Knothole owned the
only known derobotizer, which was met with instant suspicion. If
they did, why was she not derobotized? This announcement cast a shadow
of doubt on everything else she had said, and at last they released
her with the news that they would have to verify her story before
they would lend the so-called 'Knothole' any aid. They were so
accustomed to continual assault and infiltration that they assumed
the entire world was after them.
Zephyer returned to her room and fell into an exhausted sleep.
Extended interrogation was grueling, as it was as if they were
picking her brain with a magnifying glass. Her hopes were not quite
dashed. Spike's story would match hers. Surely they would believe
him ...!
* * *
They remained in the stronghold two weeks. In that time,
Zephyer saw Spike three times. The first time was through a window
in the medical ward, where the porcupine lay in a bed with his head
and neck bandaged, a cast on his arm, and eyes bright as he talked to
his mother, who was seated in the chair beside his bed. She was
sewing something with deft metallic fingers. She and her son appeared
so joyful together that Zephyer turned away with a pang. He had
regained what she had lost beyond all hope of recovery.
The second time she was allowed to talk to him in his hospital
bed for fifteen minutes. Spike was full of news about his parents, of
how much older they looked now, that his dad was one of the second-in-
command now, when back in Mobitropolis he had been a bookkeeper.
Zephyer asked him if he had been questioned. "Yeah," said Spike, face
darkening suddenly. "They didn't belive me. I'll bet they think we're
some kind of spy unit." Then he was off again in other tales of how
great his mother and father were.
Zephyer came away from their meeting with a deeper pang. Not
only did she now have the guilt of perhaps being the reason for the
Robians' distrust, she also had to deal with the envy and grief of
seeing her friend rejoice over his family. She couldn't begrudge him
his happiness--she would feel the same way--but it was the constant,
ever-present knowledge that she could never see her own family again.
The third time she saw Spike, it was for an evening's chat in
his parents' quarters. Spike wore his arm in a sling now, and his
elation had not abated. Mr. and Mrs. Quill were there as well, and
interested in talking to their son's companion. It was a pleasant
visit, but it only made Zephyer even more unhappy. She had been as
close to her parents, especially her father, as Spike was to his.
She cried herself to sleep that night.
* * *
"Get up, Miss Zephyer, you're leaving today."
Zephyer sat up in bed and blinked. "Huh? What? Going where?"
"Why, home of course," said Sheila the goat, looking around
the door. "Back to your village. Better dress up warm--it's cold
out."
The echidna fumbled into her coat and snow pants, trying to
prop her eyelids open. What time was it? The fortress was quiet, as
if it were the middle of the night. She checked her wrist, remembered
she was robotized and didn't have a watch any more, and leaned out
her door to check the clock in the hall. 4:30. Good grief, the sun
wouldn't be up for another five hours. She retreated back into her
room, packed her backpack (retrieved from the cave for examination),
sat on her bed and waited.
Before long there came a tap on the door. It opened and Bern
the robotized fox looked in. "You up?" he said gruffly. "Good. Let's
go." Zephyer hoisted her backpack and followed him out.
As it turned out, Spike was not returning to Knothole. He would
remain in Stonecleft for insurance while Bern went with Zephyer to
see if Knothole and a derobotizer were fact or fiction.
They stepped out into the dim blue world. The cold struck them
like ice water in the face. Zephyer exhaled steam into the air and
felt her dislike of the cold return full force. While the fortress was
chilly, it was not unbearably cold. Bern locked the door behind them,
said shortly, "Let's go," and strode away into the pre-dawn darkness.
Zephyer followed without a word.
If the hike up the mountain had been strenuous, it was nothing
compared to the hike down. The fox rolled along at a tremendous pace,
able to walk for hours and hours without rest. Zephyer couldn't match
him and toiled along in the rear, gasping for breath and sweating
under her metal plating. Their robotization types were different. Bern
was 90% machine and operated like one. Zephyer was 90% machine, but a
machine that relied heavily on her natural muscles and not battery
power.
Bern saw this and said nothing. He had intentionally set an
impossible pace to test whether Zephyer was really a bio-mech, as she
claimed to be. After two days, he decided she was. She was physically
unable to keep up, and at night as so tired she nodded off before she
finished eating.
They descended the mountain in glorious, blinding sunlight that
glittered on the untouched snow. Zephyer was disappointed to find
that by the time the sun rose, they had left the fortress behind. She
had wanted to see it from the outside. They hiked, camped and hiked
again for a week, leaving the mountains behind. Once they struck the
valley, Zephyer was surprised to find Bern turning south. "Do you know
where we're going?" she asked incredulously.
"I know where Robotropolis is," he replied. "You're going to
show me your village from there."
Rebuffed by his harsh tone, the echidna fell silent. "He still
thinks I'm a spy," she thought with humiliation. Even her trip up with
Spike had been more fun than this.
They saw no wolves, although they heard the pack howling several
times. Lobo had great respect for the Robians, and he didn't want to
eat Zephyer THAT badly. Zephyer wondered if Robo Knux had paid him
with a moose or something, and wondered what the 'valuble information'
had been. Certainly not anything good.
One night, sitting before the campfire and trying not to stare
at Bern's glowing orange eyes, Zephyer told her companion of what the
robot had told her. The fox didn't reply for a long time, an Zephyer
had given up all hope of an answer when he said, "For a Mecha bot to
be up here is a bad sign. I'm afraid this year will be a bad one."
He looked at Zephyer. She gazed at the solid metal-plated face,
trying to read it. He seemed to be thinking of something he wanted
to tell her. He looked into the campfire and said, "A week before
you arrived, we had a visitor at Stonecleft. I don't know who she
was ... or WHAT she was. She blackmailed us."
"What for?"
"She wanted us to help her attack something called the Floating
Island. When we refused, the threatened to reveal our location to Dr.
Robotnik. As you know, that is what we fear most."
Zephyer blanched. The Floating Island? Who in the world would
want to enlist the Robians to ...? But Bern was continuing. "We have
decided to abandon the fortress this spring. Too many outsiders know
its location, including that girl and the Mecha bot. But we don't
know where we'll go."
Zephyer opened her mouth to mention the derobotizer, then shut
it again. It just wasn't worth it. Let him see for himself.
As the miles fell away behind them, Zephyer realized she had
missed Knothole. She had missed Sonic and his never-dimming
spirits, Tails with his smile for everyone, Serena for her
companionship, Slasher ... Why had Slasher never come when Spike
had blown the whistle? The thought hit her like a thunderbolt. She
had not had time to think about it at the time, and afterward she
had simply forgotten. Slasher always came ... what if something had
happened? A thousand worries rolled together and collided in her
head.
At last they came to a wide plain, white with snow. The ruins
of Robotropolis poked up in a mass miles away on their right. The
meadows! Almost home! "This way," said Zephyer confidently, leading
the way across the plain and into the trees on their left.
The smell of woodsmoke. It struck Zephyer suddenly that she
had smelled that same smell when she and Sonic had arrived in the
village a year before. She glanced at Bern and wished he were Spike,
so she might end this adventure the way she had begun it, as she had
with Sonic. But this was a different year, a different adventure.
Zephyer hurried toward where she knew the village lay.
Tails was standing in a tree, breaking off twigs and dropping
them to Sonic below, and caught sight of the approaching figures.
"Hey!" he exclaimed shrilly. "Here comes Zephyer, and there's a
robot with her!"
A large portion of the village turned out to meet the prodigal.
Where had Zephyer been? Had she found food? Where was Spike, and who
was that with her?
Zephyer pushed through the crowd, ignoring the buzzing
questions, looking for Sally or Slasher. She saw in the villagers
faces already the first ghostly touches of malnourishment. Good
grief, had they really been gone that long? Everywhere she looked
were hollow eyes and dull fur, all gloss and sparkle gone. A cold
knot of dread formed in her stomach. If the Robians would not
help ... She looked at Bern, following a few paces behind her.
Although Knothole was familiar with Robians from long dealings with
Robotropolis escapees, no one went near Bern. One look from his
orange eyes was enough to send the boldest villager cringing away.
Ah, there was Sally, just coming out of her hut. Zephyer made
a beeline for her.
"Zephyer!" said the squirrel in amazement. "You're back! Where
did--" She broke off as she caught sight of Zephyer's forbidding
companion.
"Sal, this is Bern, a Robian fox," said Zephyer. "Bern, this
is Sally, leader of our band."
"Princess Sally?" said the robot, stopping dead in his tracks
and staring at her.
"Yes," Sally replied. "At your service."
"At you and yours," said Bern, dropping to one knee and
bowing his head. "I am at your service, your Majesty."
"Arise," said Sally, not in the least perturbed by this
display. Indeed, she seemed rather amused by it. "Come inside, if
you please. We have things to discuss." Sally shot a look at Zephyer,
who meekly followed her indoors. Better keep her fingers crossed
now ...
But it all worked out in the end. Bern was shown the
derobotizer in Eagle's Nest, and to prove to the other Robians it
worked, they derobotized his head and right arm. He turned out to be
a nice-looking grey fox, if not a little matted in places from the
metal. In return for taking in the Robians when they evacuated the
fortress, Bern pledged their entire food surplus, excluding next
year's seed.
The Freedom Fighters sent a crew and a hover transport back
to the stronghold with him, as the village was in desperate need of
food, any kind of food. They returned three days later, the transport
loaded so full it could barely hover. When it entered the village
and the doors opened, who should bound out but Spike. He raced around
until he found Zephyer. His parents would be the first to use the
derobotizer, and he was euphoric.
Zephyer sought out Slasher once everything had died down. The
big raptor had gotten over her illness, but her leg was still in a
splint. The big raptor told her of the trap, and Zephyer remembered
the night she and Spike had heard the wolves fighting something on
the creekbank. "Never fails," said Slasher wryly. "If I had just
called your names I would have found you."
Although Operation SQ had succeeded and Spike had been reunited
with his family, Zephyer was unhappy. It grew more and more pronounced
as winter melted toward spring. The echidna became depressed and
glum with homesickness, and nothing seemed to cheer her up.
Thus it was that the chao came to the village not a day too
soon. But that's another story.
The End
|
10630035
|
Passing Notes
|
{
"Archive Warning": "No Archive Warnings Apply",
"Category": "M/M",
"Characters": "Chibita (Osomatsu), Matsuno Karamatsu",
"Fandom": "おそ松さん | Osomatsu-san (Anime)",
"Language": "English",
"Rating": "Mature",
"author": "by cookinguptales",
"chapters": "1/1",
"completed": "",
"published": "2017-04-15T00:00:00",
"words": "3,164",
"Additional Tags": "Jealousy, Internalized Homophobia",
"Relationship": "Chibita/Matsuno Karamatsu",
"Character": null,
"Relationships": null,
"Series": null,
"Collections": null,
"Fandoms": null,
"Archive Warnings": null,
"Categories": null,
"Bookmarks": null,
"Chapters": null,
"Comments": null,
"Completed": null,
"Hits": null,
"Kudos": null,
"Published": null,
"Words": null,
"Updated": null
}
|
Tokyo was a big place, Karamatsu knew, and Tokyo had all types. It wasn’t like he’d never seen them around, those men who liked other men. He’d seen them standing around with their friends, gossiping or fixing their makeup, though he’d been informed, tartly enough, that you couldn’t always tell just by looking at a guy. Not all of them wore rainbow wigs on the streets of Shinjuku.Some of them, it seemed, looked just like normal salarymen. Or were just normal salarymen, he supposed. He felt like something like that should show, in your face or in your clothes or in your mannerisms. He certainly felt like everyone could see him laid bare and open whenever he caught himself staring too long at another man’s rear end. He’d page through his magazines when no one was around and allow himself to run one slow finger over the toned bodies inside, staring long and hard at lean muscles rather than the clothes that covered them. He’d blush then, a deep, private scarlet. You had to be able to see it, right? He felt like a goddamn open book.It was so much easier to look at girls, to swoon over soft curves and pouty lips. It wasn’t as if he didn’t like them. He felt unconflicted looking at a girly mag because he was pretty sure all five of his brothers had the exact same one. The men, though. The men. He was pretty sure they weren’t supposed to make his blood go just as hot as the girls did. He was definitely sure he wasn’t supposed to be looking. So he didn’t. Not outside.Maybe it was because he was so careful about not looking too hard where others might see, or maybe he was as dumb as everyone said. Or maybe there really was no way to tell just by looking at someone. Either way, he didn’t catch onto the wild double life of the salaryman sitting next to him for far too long. And maybe, just maybe, the real reason was that the man wasn’t bothering to live a double life at all.He certainly wasn’t hiding the way he looked at Chibita, anyway.Karamatsu noticed it between bites of chikuwa and he damn well nearly choked on it. The man was neat and clean-cut, the kind of guy that probably never ran out on a bill. And he was watching Chibita with open appreciation.Karamatsu forced himself to keep chewing, and he shifted his attention to Chibita. He was humming as he worked, one of those silly little oden songs that Karamatsu didn’t understand, not for one minute, but that managed to make his heart do little flip-flops all the same. Karamatsu could see the way that his muscular shoulders shifted beneath that baggy shirt of his, and the way his hips swayed to his own music. His cheeks were rosy in the heat of the steam and his lips had that pleased little quirk to them that only seemed to come out when oden was involved.No wonder the man was staring. Karamatsu was hard-pressed to keep from doing it himself. Instead, he dropped his eyes back to his plate. Safer that way.He was so intent on his plate and the nervous rhythm his shoe was scuffing out against the pavement that he almost missed it. The thing. The big thing. As it was, he glanced up just in time to see the man leave — and just in time for him to slip something else in there along with the cash he owed for his meal. It took a second for Karamatsu to make sense of the little slip of paper and the bold strokes that had been written upon it. It was a phone number. The man had slipped Chibita his goddamn phone number, and he’d done it with a wink.And Chibita, fuck, Chibita had smiled at him. There was no annoyance, no disgust. None of that famous temper. Just a little bit of playfulness to his grin as he’d taken his money and wished his (paying) customer goodnight.They’d been flirting, Karamatsu realized, and right under his damn nose.He didn’t even notice how he’d been gaping until Chibita gave him a pointed look. “Shut your mouth, idjit. You’ll get flies.”He shut it quick, with an almost audible snap. He swallowed and tried to right the world even as it tilted. “But he…”Chibita shrugged as he put the money away, and Karamatsu was dizzyingly, bewilderingly relieved to see him drop the slip of paper into the trash. “It happens sometimes. I don’t think they really mean anything by it,” he said.Karamatsu sputtered a little. Only Chibita would get actual phone numbers and think they’d been anything other than an explicit invitation. “But he was undressing you with his eyes!” he burst out, and abruptly felt his cheeks heat. Fuck.Chibita looked a little thrown by that one, but he just shrugged again, a little less sure this time, and closed the money box. His cheeks, Karamatsu noticed, had gone an especially fetching shade of pink. “It’s just because I’m so small,” he said, and his lips twisted even as he ducked his head. “Get a few beers into them, and they keep talking about how cute I am.”Well, Karamatsu reasoned, that was probably because he was. Chibita was incredibly cute, and anyone with eyes could see it. Sure, his terrifying devotion to street food took the edge off of all that sweetness, but most of his customers probably didn’t know about that — or his experience with kidnapping. They just saw his soft lines and knew, just as surely as Karamatsu did, that he would fit perfectly in their arms.Karamatsu swallowed. “This — this happens a lot?” he asked, but he knew even as he did what the answer was. Why the hell wouldn’t it? Why the hell hadn’t he ever considered this before, that everyone else could see the same damn thing that Karamatsu had been trying so hard to ignore?Chibita hummed noncommittally. “Sometimes,” he said, and poked a skewer into one of the vats.Karamatsu hesitated a moment, wondering if he really wanted to continue down this line of questioning. But the curiosity inside him would not be sated, not even with all the trepidation in the world. “Have you ever… Y’know…”Chibita squinted at him. Then his eyes widened in understanding. “Called them? Fuck no. Wouldn’t want to scare off any customers,” he said.Karamatsu bit at the inside of his lip and tried to ignore the way his stomach curled in on itself. That made sense. Chibita wouldn’t want to weird anyone out.Chibita kept talking, seemingly ignorant to the storm clouds Karamatsu could hardly keep off his face. “Like what would I do if it was a shitty date or something? They’d never come back and I’d be out a paying customer. The trick, Karaboy, is to keep them hungry,” he said.And then he winked. Karamatsu nearly swallowed his damn tongue. When he’d retrieved it from its journey down his throat, he finally stammered out, “But— But you like girls. I saw you. With…” He trailed off again, and was barely able to tack on a lame little “y’know.”All at once, Chibita’s face shuttered. There was a reason why they never talked about her and why Karamatsu had always kept quiet about witnessing their brief tryst. He didn’t say anything for several long minutes. Instead, his busied himself with other things around the cart. Shuffling away some dirty dishes, wiping down the back counter.Karamatsu felt even smaller. “Chibita—”“I like both,” Chibita finally said, and there was something defiant in his voice, a strong backbone to cover up an old wound. “And that was a long time ago.”Both…? Karamatsu felt like something that was hot and cold at the same time was trickling down his spine to pool in the pit of his stomach. “So you don’t mind when…?” he trailed off, not even sure how he wanted to finish that question.Chibita’s eyebrow quirked. “Guys hit on me?” He gave Karamatsu a long, measuring look. Then, “Nope.”The hot turned to fire. The cold turned to ice. Karamatsu trembled a little from the combination. His mind was full now, full. Of the way that man had looked at Chibita. Of the way Chibita had smiled back. Of the way his lips had curled around that little “nope”. Of what might happen, one day, if a man approached Chibita somewhere other than the cart.There was a flash of something hot in his mind then, something steamy and sweet with far too much skin, and Karamatsu shook his head to dislodge those mental images from his head. Chibita might say yes one day, and his mind balked at that for reasons he couldn’t quite put his finger on.It was just bizarre, he decided. And that was it. His fingers curled against the counter top, and he could feel his nails catch on the wooden grain. “But don’t you— Don’t you think that’s kind of obscene?” he asked.Chibita’s eyebrows jumped and he settled back on his heels. “Not a question I ever thought I’d hear you ask,” he muttered. “What the hell do you mean, anyway?”Karamatsu hesitated. That was a dangerous note in Chibita’s voice, and he knew it. He was going to have to tread softly here. “Just… Doing that out in the open like that? At work?” He paused, trying to force his tongue to be anything but tied. “I mean, all those men… They don’t come just because you flirt with them, do you?”“Excuse me?” Both of Chibita’s hands landed flat against his workstation, and the sound was enough to make Karamatsu jump. “Are you trying to say my oden’s not reason enough?”“No!” Karamatsu said, because he was confused but he wasn’t fucking suicidal. “But…” He thought about the way Chibita had smiled at that man, and the way the man’s answering grin had gone a little hot, a little dopey at the attention. Karamatsu knew he’d be no better off if Chibita looked at him that way. “Smiling at them like that can’t hurt. You must get a lot of guys who come back just for that.”The rage was melting away from Chibita’s tiny body, leaving something like confusion in its wake. He looked at Karamatsu like he’d never seen him before, eyes roving up and down as if he were a puzzle that Chibita couldn’t quite sort out. “Karamatsu,” Chibita said slowly, “Are you jealous?”Karamatsu froze, his stuttering foot going abruptly still. “No,” he said. No. Of course he wasn’t. Chibita was — was nice to look at, yeah. And Karamatsu knew that he wasn’t straight, not all the way. He couldn’t be. But that wasn’t the same thing as being jealous that other men maybe sort of had a chance with Chibita. He’d gotten through it okay when Chibita had dated that girl, hadn’t he? He’d had a brief, bewilderingly intense moment of I want that but then he’d tried to go out and get it, hadn’t he? And look where that had gotten him.Karamatsu hadn’t felt jealous when Chibita was with the girl. He’d felt something else, something very different. He’d felt somewhere between pleased and resigned, probably. Happy that Chibita would no longer be alone, and sad that he was not in the same position. But not particularly surprised, either.He didn’t feel like that now. He kind of felt like someone had been playing kickball with his stomach. And why the hell was this bothering him so much, anyway? Why did he care that Chibita was apparently gay catnip, or that his oden somehow, ineffably, brought all the boys to the yard? Why did he care that Chibita wasn’t straight? Why did he care that one day, Chibita might end up dating — fuck, he couldn’t even finish the thought without feeling vaguely sick. He hadn’t thought that he was particularly homophobic before now. It was weird, certainly, and nothing he wanted to be. It was embarrassing. It was one of the many, many parts of himself that he wished he could cut away. But other people, well. Love was love, right?So why the fuck was he so upset when he thought about Chibita having sex with some guy? Or worse, loving him? He’d been okay, for the most part, when Chibita had loved a girl.But then Karamatsu chanced a look upward at Chibita, who still looked perplexed more than anything, and he felt a staggering pang of loss that he’d never felt before. And it finally clicked. Before now, he didn’t know that men were even an option for Chibita. He couldn’t lose Chibita because he never could have had him. He’d felt resigned when Chibita had dated the fairy because he’d accepted right from the start that Chibita was going to want a pretty girl, not a man like him. But now, against all odds, Chibita was flirting with men. Men very clearly were an option. It was just Karamatsu that he didn’t want.Fuck. Fuck. He was so fucking jealous. And he still had zero chance with the guy he wanted. Karamatsu gulped down the acid threatening to climb up his throat and tried to steady himself instead. He’d been quiet for too long, he abruptly realized. He had to say something to throw off the suspicions that were slowly coalescing on Chibita’s face. “No,” he finally said. “Why would I get jealous over you dating? You can do whatever you want,” he said, and then shrugged weakly. “It’s a free country. Have fun.”He should say something about the beauty of love here, or desire, or — fuck, something — to make it sound genuine. He would’ve said something like that for anyone else. But he just couldn’t make his lips make the sounds. Instead, he just looked down into his lap.“Karamatsu,” Chibita said, “I meant jealous of me. Not them.”Fuck. That made so much more sense. Fuck. He absolutely could have passed this off as just being closeted. He was, wasn’t he? It would have been so easy to just make it seem like he was jealous of Chibita’s obvious way with men. It would have fucking sucked, and he probably would have gotten mocked for the rest of his life over it, but Chibita wouldn’t have known the truth. He wouldn’t have known that Chibita was the only man Karamatsu really cared about. Shit. Fuck.He knew he was red now, and this wasn’t just shyness. He wasn’t just embarrassed. There was the sick roll of humiliation in his stomach, because shit, he’d really gone and done it now, hadn’t he? Chibita would definitely figure out Karamatsu’s stupid little crush. There was no way he wouldn’t.So Karamatsu did what anyone else in his position would do. He fucking ran. “Thank you for the food,” he mumbled in one quick jumble of syllables, and he pushed himself to his feet. He’d had a beer before Mr. Hot Gay Salaryman had come to call, but he couldn’t blame the way his legs were wobbling now on just one beer.“Karamatsu—”He groped around in his pocket for some bills, then threw them on the counter. It was too much for the night’s meal, he knew, but maybe the extra cash would distract Chibita long enough that he could make his getaway. Besides, wasn’t as if he didn’t owe Chibita money anyway.“Karamatsu, wait.”“It’s late,” Karamatsu said. “I need to go—”“I said wait, you goddamn idjit!”Karamatsu stopped. Karamatsu waited. He still didn’t look at Chibita.“You know why I flirt with those guys, Karamatsu?”Karamatsu winced. Because they were attractive, confident, and successful? Because they didn’t hover back at the closet door? Because no one, definitely no one, called them "painful"?“Because,” Chibita said meaningfully, “They tell me that they’re interested.”What? What the goddamn hell? The statement was so bizarre, so pointed, so entirely absurd, that Karamatsu couldn’t help but look up at him. Chibita was looking at him flatly, but there was something expectant in his eyes. Like he actually expected Karamatsu to…It didn’t make any sense. None whatsoever. But there was still a strange little bubble rising up inside him, and before he could think to stop himself, he said, “You mean…”Chibita sighed, and there was that one look that Karamatsu loved more than almost any other, that fond sort of exasperation that he only seemed to direct at him. “I didn’t throw away your number, did I?” he asked.And no. No, he hadn’t. He’d stolen Karamatsu’s phone away from him, in fact, two weeks after almost lighting him ablaze. Karamatsu had felt a fire that had nothing to do with torchlight back then, and he’d found himself wandering back to Chibita’s oden cart more often. It’d been the only place he didn’t feel his sorrows. And after that, after awkward visits and haphazard conversations, Chibita had snatched his phone away from him and typed in his own number — just in case he got kidnapped again. Chibita’d said he had a feeling there’d be more of that in Karamatsu’s future, and it wasn’t as if he could count on his family to help him. And Karamatsu had given Chibita his phone number, too. He’d watched Chibita program it into his phone himself.Karamatsu stared at Chibita, and he could almost feel the gears creaking to life inside his head, unfettered by his own neuroses for the first time. Chibita, with that sweet smile and his fingers brushing against Karamatsu’s, had been flirting with him. Him! And he hadn’t even fucking noticed, too caught up in the simple joy of making a genuine connection.He’d had a chance. He’d always had a chance. Had he missed it? He opened his mouth, but for once, he truly had no idea what to say. All the pretty words he’d thought to himself in rare moments of privacy, all the endearments and sweet nothings he’d imagined whispering to Chibita even as he’d taken himself in hand, all of them seemed to escape him then, leaving him silent and tongue-tied and wide-eyed in Chibita’s presence.Chibita sighed and made a little tsk sound with his mouth, then he shook his head and pulled out his phone.Karamatsu’s heart sank. “Chibita…” he started, begging his heart, pleading with it, to get its damn rear in gear and give him something meaningful to say.Before he could summon anything up, though, he was interrupted by a soft chime from his pocket. He frowned, then pulled out his phone. He rarely got messages from anyone.
‘Call me. [kiss] [oden]’
A shaky, almost disbelieving smile crooked at the corners of Karamatsu’s mouth, and with trembling fingers, he went to type his reply.
|
10676631
|
of tattoo lines and
|
{
"Archive Warning": "Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings",
"Category": "M/M",
"Characters": "Jeon Jungkook, Min Yoongi | Suga",
"Fandom": "방탄소년단 | Bangtan Boys | BTS",
"Language": "English",
"Rating": "General Audiences",
"author": "by yoongioppa",
"chapters": "1/1",
"completed": "",
"published": "2017-04-19T00:00:00",
"words": "2,509",
"Additional Tags": "Tattoos, magic tattoos????, jungkook and yoongi sure are cute, Tattoo Artist Yoongi, smoll bub kookie, new and improved, and by that i mean i edited it so if you read it, reread it. i fixed stuff and discribed yoongi's tat SO much better now, god was it bad, Soulmates, Soulmate-Identifying Marks, jungkook goes through some major soul searching, i found this prompt on tumblr and fell in love, pls expect more tumblr prompts these are the bomb diggity, Tumblr Prompt",
"Relationship": null,
"Character": null,
"Relationships": "Jeon Jungkook/Min Yoongi | Suga, Jeon Jungkook & Min Yoongi | Suga",
"Series": null,
"Collections": null,
"Fandoms": null,
"Archive Warnings": null,
"Categories": null,
"Bookmarks": null,
"Chapters": null,
"Comments": null,
"Completed": null,
"Hits": null,
"Kudos": null,
"Published": null,
"Words": null,
"Updated": null
}
|
Jungkook remembers waking up on his fifteenth birthday with a sharp stinging sensation crawling up his back, dulling into a tickle as it reached his shoulder, before finally stopping. Jungkook had groaned, rolling over in his bed, a short, inhuman sound ripping from his throat as he stretched his arms over his head, letting them flop onto his stomach once he felt his bones crack. He smacked his lips, mouth feeling dry with the leftover taste of sleep making his tongue heavy and thick. Climbing down from his bed, he made a stop at the bathroom, eye lids hooded and unseeing until he walked into the kitchen, sliding into his seat and resting his head on his arms, perched on the table to form a makeshift pillow.“Hey, Jeon Jungkook, no sleeping at the table,” his mother quipped causing Jungkook to let a small puff of air leave his slightly parted lips before lifting his head, scrubbing a hand through his hair and over his face in an attempt to wipe the sleep away.“Mommy, mommy, Jungkookie has something all over his back!” His little brother, Minjae had said, causing Jungkook to scowl. “Look! It’s so pretty.”“What are you talking about?” Jungkook snapped, annoyed at his younger brother’s obvious ploy to get him in trouble. “There’s nothing on my back.”“Yes there is!” Minjae insisted. “It’s a lot of flowers! But Jungkookie didn’t get to finish his drawing.” Jungkook frowned, turning his head trying to look at what Minjae was talking about. His eyes caught the edges of leaves in his peripheral and he bolted up, rushing to his room.“Jungkook!” His mother squealed, but Jungkook paid it no mind, opening his closet doors to be able to see his back in the mirrors, eyes glued on the half finished tattoo that was crawling up his back.Flowers. There were so many flowers. Pinks and purples and whites mixed with oranges and reds and yellows. Jungkook was stunned, seeing the way they twisted and rose from the bottom of his spine towards his shoulders, fading into what looked like a sketch the closer it reached his arm. The tattoo was huge, but the flowers medium sized and extremely detailed, looking as realistic as if someone had just pressed the flowers into Jungkook’s skin. Jungkook couldn’t take his eyes off of it, letting his eyes wander up and down his back, trying to take in all the details of what he knew was his soulmate’s mark.“Oh,” Jungkook heard his mother say, finally making him look away from his tattoo and glance at his door, locking eyes with his mother. “That’s beautiful, Kookie.” Jungkook could only nod, eyes flickering back to his mirror. “It’s… It’s big.” Jungkook nodded again, feeling his mouth go dry. When someone first gets their tattoo, depending on how large it is tells how long it might take to meet their mate. From the sheer size of Jungkook’s, he could only imagine how long he’d have to wait to meet his other half.That was nearly six years ago, and Jungkook could barely stand to look at his tattoo now. He had long since searched the meaning of the flowers, and found that most of his tattoos were the birth flowers for two specific months of the year, September asters and March daffodils, with a few others mixed into the garden Jungkook called his Soul Tat. Lavender stalks, gladioluses, sweet peas and more, all tangled and looping around, making his remarkable stretch of back muscles even more memorable (or at least, that’s what he assumed, since most all his lovers have either taken photos of it, or spent what seemed like hours sitting on his lower back, tracing their fingers over the intricate design).Jungkook had traveled Korea, in hopes of finding the man or woman meant for him, only to find nobody. After six months of trying to find his mate, he started to notice the lustful looks shot his way when he was at clubs late at night, drink in his hand after an exhausting day of finding no hints, no clues. He started taking them home, and eventually, had started dating some. They’d be happy for months, only for it to come to the same end every time. They’d come to Jungkook’s apartment or hotel room with a new man or woman hanging on their arm, bringing them into his home, as they packed away their things, happy giggles spilling from their lips as they stopped to examine their newly finished tattoos at any mirror they crossed. They’d leave Jungkook with a short kiss on his cheek wishing him luck with finding his soulmate, leaving him with a clenched jaw and an aching heart.After a year and a half of seeing his lovers leave, and not finding his own mate, he decided enough was enough, and returned home, knocking on his mother’s door with full hands and a heavy heart.“Jungkookie?” His mom asks as she opens the door, eyes wide as she looks her son up and down. “What—?”“I was wondering if I could stay here for a while,” Jungkook says, his lips trying to twitch into a smile, his eyes showing his true feelings. Even after two years of not seeing her son, Jungkook’s mother could still tell what was going on, giving her son a small nod, not prying into it for the time being, something Jungkook was grateful for.“Of course, darling!” She said, reaching to grab one of Jungkook’s bag, helping him into the house and putting his bags inside his old bedroom. Jungkook looked around, noticing some of his stuff in boxes and what seemed like half a painted wall. “Sorry about this. Your father got it into his head that he could make this a den, but lost interest in packing your stuff about a fourth of the way through.” Jungkook laughed, laying down on the bed and staring up at his ceiling.“That sounds so like him,” he mumbled, his eyes fluttering. “I think I’m going to sleep for a while mom, I have a lot to think about.” His mother smiled softly and nodded, walking over to place a soft kiss on her boy’s forehead.“I’ll be here to talk with when you wake up, honey bunches.” Jungkook smiled and snuggled into his bed, waiting till his mother was gone from the room to pull his pants off, leaving his oversized sweater on despite the heat.Soon, he thought to himself, staring at the mirror at his clothed back and arm, before shutting his eyes. With no one knowing, I’ll go.Jungkook thought for days, walking around his home as if the tattoo on his back weighed him down, making his feet drag and his bones crackle at every turn. He was on his phone for hours at a time everyday, searching and searching until finally, one day, he found the perfect match of what he needed. He spent that night with his phone clutched in his hand, staring at the website he found, barely sleeping. The following day (is it really even considered a new day if you hadn’t slept at all?), Jungkook called from the confines of his room, booking an appointment for twenty minutes later, hoping to find out prices of what he wishes to do, and thanking the man on the other end profusely, saying he’ll see him soon. Jungkook got ready in five minutes, and walked out of his room, only to barely miss crashing straight into his mother, who was on the other side of the door, hand poised to knock.“Oh. Jungkookie, just the person I was looking for!” His mother said, giggling nervously. Jungkook raised his brows, watching as his mother wipes invisible sweat from her brow. “What are you up to today?”“I have an appointment to go to,” Jungkook stated, trying to get around his mother, who simply stepped in his way.“Can’t you can cancel it, honey? There’s so much you can do around the house for me!” His mother said, laughing nervously once again. Jungkook stared at her and blinked.“What? No, mom, I can’t cancel it,” Jungkook said, frowning. “I need to borrow the car though, if that’s fine.” Jungkook’s mother clenched her jaw, looking like she wanted to argue, but then stared deeply into her son’s eyes and let out that puff of air, deflating and moving over to the side.“Yeah, yeah, just… The keys are next to the door where they always are,” she mumbled, and Jungkook nodded, walking over and slipping his shoes on, unhooking the keys from the latch. “Jungkook?” His mother called before he stepped out of the door.“Yeah?”“I hope you thought about this.”Jungkook looks outside silently. Did he think about it? Of course he had. It wasn’t an easy decision to make, but Jungkook was tired, and this seemed like the only way to be rejuvenated.“Yes,” he whispered, “I have.” She nodded, turning and walking into the kitchen, letting Jungkook leave and do as he pleased.It was a surprisingly short drive, and even though his mother’s car had no working A/C, he kept his sweater on, feeling his legs bounce at every stoplight. Jungkook found the little shop with surprising ease, and parked the car right in front of the door, shutting it off and sitting in silence for a little while.“You can do this, Jeon Jungkook,” he whispered to himself. “You’ve thought about it, you know you have. It’s time to let go.”He walked out of the car and made his way to the little tattoo shop, opening the door and feeling the A/C smack his face, cooling the small beads of sweat that had formed on his forehead. A man sat in the chair at the desk, looking down at a sketchbook with small round glasses perched on his nose.“Hello?” Jungkook called out, voice feeling awfully small. That man held up a small, tattooed hand, signaling Jungkook to wait a moment. When the man was done with what he was doing, he looked up and locked eyes with Jungkook, causing Jungkook to freeze in his spot.The man was gorgeous, if not a little scary looking, every inch of his body from head down covered in beautiful tattoos depicting flowers and plants. Jungkook felt a tingle go up his spine, crawling up his back and going down his arm, at the intense eyes the other man had.“You’re my appointment?” The man asked, sitting up straight in his seat and taking off his glasses, letting them hang around his neck from the cord attached to them.“Y-yeah,” Jungkook stuttered, before cleaning his throat and making his voice a little deeper. “I mean, yes, I am.” The other man smirked, obviously amused as he stood from his chair and walking around the desk, leaning against it. Jungkook could see the lean muscle of the man’s arm from where he stood, also taking in the tattoo’s the man had etched into the skin of his pale arms.“Name’s Yoongi,” the man said, introducing himself.“Jungkook,” he replied softly.“What do you need me to do?” Yoongi asked, tilting his head. Jungkook rubbed his face, before his hand shifted and he rubbed the back of his neck, where he knew a daffodil and an aster was, rubbing around the flowers with delicate fingers.“Can you finish a tattoo for me?” Jungkook asked, causing Yoongi to raise a brow.“Depends how big it is and what I’d have to do, but I’ll try, buddy.” Yoongi said. “Come with me to the back to have a look at it.” Jungkook nodded, and walked after Yoongi, stepping into a small room. “Let’s have a look then. Where is it?” Jungkook simply took his sweater off instead of answering, turning so his back was facing the artist.“It, uh, it goes from the bottom of my spine up, but stops right at my shoulder. Any way you can finish it?”“Kid, is this a joke?” Yoongi growled, and Jungkook turned back to look at the man.“What? No! Why would I joke about this?” He stammered, feeling his face flush.“Listen, that is one of the most finished tattoo’s I think I’ve ever seen. Beautiful too,” Yoongi said. “Looks like my work, actually,” the small man mumbled, making Jungkook scrunch his brow.“Finished? It can’t possibly be finished, that’s my soul…” Jungkook stopped, suddenly remembering the tingling sensation he felt earlier. “It’s my soulmate tattoo…” He finished, staring at the ground. “But it wasn’t… It wasn’t complete this morning.” Yoongi blinked, his eyes widening before he pulled off his own shirt, eyes focusing on a tattoo on his back.“Holy shit,” Yoongi whispered, staring at the tattoo. Jungkook looked at it too, seeing a line of small shadowy figures dance along the small mans spine. There were figures with different colours, and structures, but one remained the same, black, with a single red heart. It held onto the different figures, dancing with them and then letting them go, pieces of his heart breaking more and more, leaving remnants of it behind with each of them, until it barely had any. At the bottom of Yoongi’s spine, the little figure held onto another black figure, their hearts merging as one in the center. Jungkook blanched, instantly seeing the connection between his life and Yoongi’s tattoo.“Holy shit is right,” Jungkook mumbled, finally glancing at his own tattoo, seeing the way the unfinished flowers of before had sprouted and encompassed his arm, wrapping around each other, but only having daffodils and asters down the stretch of his arm, a strange mix of colours that somehow worked together beautifully, leaving Jungkook in awe.After staring at their newly finished tattoos in silence, they turned to each other, their eyes locking, and they closed the small distance between them, standing close to one another. Jungkook couldn’t help it when he started crying, shocking the smaller man as Jungkook took Yoongi into his arms, crushing him in a hug.“I-I thought I’d n-never fi-find you!” Jungkook whispered, feeling the tears drip down his cheeks and cling onto his chin, probably looking like a disgusting mess, but then he heard Yoongi sniffling and felt the small man shake in his arms, and he figured it was okay to cry. “I looked all over the country and I couldn’t… You weren’t—““Hey, it’s, it’s okay,” Yoongi whispered. “Don’t worry. From the looks of it we both had to do some major soul searching before we could possibly be ready for each other,” Yoongi mumbled, clutching Jungkook tightly. Jungkook nodded, and pulled back, eyes not leaving Yoongi’s while taking in all his features, from the way his eyes were small and cat like, to his small and round nose, and the little beauty mark on his cheek. Jungkook smiled, burrowing his face in Yoongi’s hair once again.“All that searching was definitely worth it.”
|
10698240
|
Just keep it safe for me
|
{
"Archive Warning": "No Archive Warnings Apply",
"Category": "F/M",
"Characters": "Ringabel (Bravely Default), Edea Lee",
"Fandom": "Bravely Default (Video Game) & Related Fandoms",
"Language": "English",
"Rating": "General Audiences",
"author": "by nanairo",
"chapters": "1/1",
"completed": "",
"published": "2017-04-22T00:00:00",
"words": "717",
"Additional Tags": "vague end game spoilers (for BD)",
"Relationship": "Edea Lee/Ringabel",
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Suddenly, and without any prior context or conversation whatsoever, Ringabel handed Edea a box. It was small, and fit just exactly in her hand. The Eternian looked at the older man questioningly, but the latter immediately averted his gaze.Her glance lingered for a few moments more before she turned her attention to the box, and opening the lid gently, she gasped in surprise.“A... a ring?”In the box was a gold band, engraved with a rose pattern and garnished with little white gems. It was simple and unlike what she usually had him buy in the past, but it had its own charm.Edea continued to stare at the glittering golden band incredulously.“A ring?” she repeated her question, looking pointedly at Ringabel for an explanation. The older blonde still did not meet her gaze, but after taking a deep breath and closing his eyes, answered.“A ring. Indeed, it is.”Edea said nothing, staring at the older man’s profile and awaiting more clarification.“Now, now, Edea, am I really that handsome for you to keep staring at--”He got cut off by his own yelp of pain as the Grand-Marshal-in-the-making suddenly stomped on his foot with her (very pointy, he noted) heel. Ringabel barely regained his balance and hobbled on one foot, hissing in pain while he clutched the injured one."Well you can't just give.....something like this , without saying anything else!" Edea crossed her arms, scowling. "Be thankful that I didn't throw you overboard!"That might have been less painful, he thought inwardly; he naturally dared not voice it out. Composing himself, Ringabel stood on both his feet (with weight on one foot more than the other) and leaned on the Grandship’s railing.The sky was turning orange as the sun began to disappear on the other side of the horizon. It would have made quite the romantic and breathtaking sight under normal circumstances, Ringabel thought.But alas, although Edea does take his breath away in so many ways, he and Edea never were a normal circumstance.He brushed back some of his hair and inhaled. “It means… well, what you think it means.”Edea's energy to talk and retort seemed to vanish in that instant; she bit her lip and looked down at her feet, gripping her sleeve unconsciously. A period of silence passed between them, with the older of the two just staring at the horizon and the younger looking down at the floorboard. The young Eternian uncrossed her arms and looked at the ring that suddenly grew heavy in her hand, glittering golden orange in the sunset.“Ringabel, I--”“It’s quite alright, Edea,”Edea looked up and saw that he was still staring off into the horizon, with a somber smile.Ringabel continued. “I know. Not only that this is an incredibly absurd time for these kinds of things, with the things we still have to attend to--” He laughed, but it rang hollow in Edea’s ears “--But also that… Well…” He grimaced for a split-second (was it just the light?) and finally faced her. A shadow was cast on his features, and Edea could barely make out Ringabel’s expression-- although she saw his lips curved in a smile.“You are important to me, very important,” his voice was quiet, but clear, “There is no need for you to do anything. I just wished to let you know.”He turned his head to the side. “Just keep it safe for me,” he said in a barely audible whisper. So I can somehow remain by your side remained trapped in his throat, unheard by the intended recipient. “ And keep yourself safe for me . ”Edea wordlessly looked at the box in her hand. A long moment of silence passed between them once more, until she finally made a quiet “Alright” in agreement to his request.Letting out a sigh (of relief or of something else, Edea wasn’t too sure), the older man turned about, raising his arms and stretching. “Well, it’s an hour more to Eternia. I’ll be at the bridge. If you’ll… excuse me.”As Edea watched his retreating back, Ringabel turned around once more--this time, his face was lit a pink hue from the vanishing sun, a sincere smile from the bottom of his heart.“Thank you, Edea.”
|
10656015
|
Youre Always Going To Be
|
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"Archive Warning": "Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings",
"Category": "M/M",
"Characters": "Tom DeLonge, Mark Hoppus, Travis Barker",
"Fandom": null,
"Language": "English",
"Rating": "Explicit",
"author": "by ftmethan98",
"chapters": "1/1",
"completed": "",
"published": "2017-04-17T00:00:00",
"words": "1,546",
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Deciding to get back together was easy, fixing the relationship he had fucked over was hard. After practice every day, Tom tried his best to socialize with Mark, but the older man just wasn’t having it. This made the unit Blink used to be go right down the drain. “I’ll play music with you but forget me doing anything else with you.” Mark had said to him during a break in the session to go get food. Tom swore he felt a few tears roll down his cheeks, but he refused to look or feel hurt in front of the other.
He decided to confront Travis about the situation to see if he could do anything to win his best friend and once love of his life back. “Give him time, he’ll come around. Dude when you told us you were coming back, Mark was ecstatic. It’s just now the years of separation are coming to smack him in the face with you actually being here. So, chill Tom, just leave it alone for now.”
Tom nodded at Travis’ words and had to bite his lip to keep his emotions in check. He really didn’t want to wait around and do nothing but he didn’t see any other choices. He slunk back over to the couch in Mark’s basement where they had been playing and curled up, facing the back of the couch, pulling his knees up near his chest. “I’m just gonna stay here while you two go get lunch.” He said. “I’m exhausted anyway.”
It was late at night when he re-opened his eyes. “Damn I overslept.” He said quietly to himself, rubbing at his eyes and sitting up. He pulled off the blanket, “Wait…blanket?” He thought confused, he didn’t remember putting one around himself. He also noticed the take out next to him on a TV tray. Travis must have brought them for him.
“Hey, thought you never going to get your lazy ass up.” He heard as Mark came around from the stairway. Tom felt a lump forming in his throat that only got worse when the other man sat down beside him. “Look… I’m sorry for being a dick the past couple weeks. I’m just still hurting from everything that happened. I tried to just sweep in under the rug and pretend it never happened…b-but… being face to face with your best friend who left you, who’s acting like nothings out of the ordinary… The point is, I know I’ve been a jackass. I wanna work on us Tommy.” He said.
Tears were flowing down Tom’s face now as he grabbed Mark into an embrace, hiding his face within the nape of the older’s neck. “T-Tom? Hey… hey buddy it’s okay.” Mark shushed him, rubbing at the small of his back. “We’ll get through this okay? It’ll just take a little time.” He said.
Tom nuzzled further into Mark and spoke, his voice shaking and muffled. “What was that bud?” Mark asked, pulling the younger man off him a bit to hear him. “I-I still l-love you… I-I want to be with you. I’m s-so scared you won’t have me…” Tom said, the crying only getting worse. Mark frowned, he hated seeing Tom in such a state. “Tom… like I said… it’s going to take some time, but I love you too. That’s mostly why I’ve been so angry. I didn’t want to ignore the problems… I want to fix them so we can resume where we left off.” Mark replied placing a chaste kiss to Tom’s jaw.
Tom sniffled and clung harder to Mark, his larger frame starting to constrict him. “Tom, Tommy, it’s okay. Easy baby…” Mark said, turning him a bit so he could cradle him. He placed a few more kisses down the younger’s neck. Tom whined and tried to nestle back against Mark. “W-what are you doing, silly?” He asked through his chuckle. Tom didn’t reply, only kept it up.
“Here, let’s go upstairs. If you want to cuddle we can go lay down.” Mark said taking Tom’s hand to lead him up the stairs. Tom cracked a small smile. It was starting to feel like it used to between the two of them. He remembered past times where he had been upset and Mark practically babied him trying to make everything better, such as in this moment. He could feel it within himself that everything was going to be okay.
When they reached Mark’s room, he pulled down the covers on the bed and motioned for Tom to come over to him. He handed him a pair of pajama pants, much to short on his tall frame. Mark stifled a laugh at seeing his lanky friend in them as he slipped on his own. “Do I look stupid?” Tom asked looking down. “Always.” Mark replied jokingly, earning himself a pillow to the face.
“It’s okay to um… share the bed with you right? I could always go sleep on the co-“ Mark interrupted him. “I’m pretty sure I invited you in here, didn’t I?” He asked. Tom nodded blushing slightly as he climbed in beside the slighter man. “I missed you so much Tommy…” He said as he curled closely against Tom, spooning him from behind.
Tom always felt so much smaller when Mark held him like this. “I’ve missed you too Mark… I’ve missed this…” He said as he turned in Mark’s arms, kissing him softly upon the lips. Mark kissed back fervently. “Taking this slowly is about to go down the drain, isn’t it?” He asked. “You bet your ass!” Tom replied. “Rather bet yours.”
The taller smiled shyly as Mark clambered over top him, pinning him to the bed by his wrists and sitting on his hips. “M-mark are you sure? It’s been a while and… maybe we’re not ready for this yet.” He said, his skin now flushed all the way down and across his chest. Mark gave him a serious look. “I wouldn’t be on top of you right now if I wasn’t… do you not want to?” He finished and began to get off Tom, who quickly grabbed his arm.
“Don’t be stupid Marky! I was only worried about you.” Tom said pulling him back down. In reply, Mark took Tom’s bottom lip between his teeth and pulled back gently. “No need to.” He then kissed him lovingly, pushing his tongue past the younger’s lips, entwining theirs together. “M-mark…” Tom moaned as they broke apart. “It’s alright. I’ve got you. We’ll take it slow.” He assured him.
Mark slid his fingers in slowly along the waistband of Tom’s borrowed PJ’s and boxers, carefully gliding them off. Tom took in a breath hissing at the sudden cool air hitting his bare skin. “Y-you too, Mark.” He said not wanting to be the only one naked. “Patience babe.” Mark replied, now slipping out of his.
Tom’s breath hitched as he felt Mark’s bare cock slide across his. “Mmm… do that again.” He said. Mark smirked and ground his hips down, again brushing his against Tom’s, pre-cum already leaking from both. “God it’s been so long… I’m not going to last long Mark…” Mark nibbled on Tom’s neck and shifted the other’s knees open.
“Neither will I Tom. Let’s just enjoy the moment.” He said nudging the head of his cock against Tom’s entrance. Mark shuffled around for a moment, tilting to grab a tube of liquid from the bedside stand. He squeezed a copious amount onto his hand and smeared it along his length. “Need me to open you up?” He asked leaning down to catch Tom’s lips again.
“N-no just… I’ve missed you please, just get on with it Mark.” Tom replied spreading his thighs more and hooking his legs over Mark’s hips. Mark nodded, becoming impatient himself. Oh how he’d missed his lover. He pushed in slowly giving Tom time to adjust before bottoming out. “F-fuck Marky!” He called out squeezing his eyes shut at the intrusion.
“I didn’t hurt you did I” Mark asked frantically pulling out somewhat. “N-no! Move!” Tom replied, grasping at the shorter’s back. Mark set a slow pace and reveled at the feeling of Tom’s tight ass around him. “God you’re so good Tommy. So good for me baby.” Mark said as went deeper.
Tom’s breath was shaking and hitching. His orgasm was approaching rapidly, he couldn’t take Mark pounding him so thoroughly. He was the first to tip over the edge, his cum shooting out in thick white ropes all over his stomach. Mark was quick to follow, releasing his load into Tom at the sight of his lover blissed out. “Fuck… it’s all for you Tommy.” He said
Moments later, after catching his breath, Mark carefully pulled out and rolled over beside Tom. He gently cradled the taller man in his arms and took a tissue out of the box by his bed to clean him off. “T-that was amazing.” Tom said nuzzling against Mark’s shoulder. Mark smiled and reached down to pull up the covers. “Amazing and exhausting.” Mark replied. “Now let’s get some sleep, we have to practice again tomorrow before we leave on tour.” Tom nodded and had no trouble dozing off wrapped in Mark’s warm arms.
|
10619676
|
You Dont Mean Nothing At
|
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"Archive Warning": "No Archive Warnings Apply",
"Category": "M/M",
"Characters": "Sidney Crosby, Claude Giroux, Philadelphia Flyers Ensemble",
"Fandom": "Hockey RPF",
"Language": "English",
"Rating": "Explicit",
"author": "by viceperannum",
"chapters": "1/1",
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"published": "2017-04-14T00:00:00",
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Claude was toweling his hair, wearing only his boxer briefs, his skin cold and goose-bumping in the air conditioned locker room, when the low chatter of his waiting teammates fell abruptly silent. Once he looked up and saw why, he couldn’t find words either.Sidney Crosby was standing in front of the door by the benches. He wore sweats and a T-shirt and flip-flops, and his hair curled damp at his forehead. His shoulders were square, his expression blank, his eyes flat.“What the fuck are you doing here?” Jakes asked, more curious than aggressive.Crosby ignored Jakes entirely, his gaze on Claude. It was arrogant in the way that only Crosby could be, but at the same time, Claude understood. As much as this rivalry had burned through everyone on both teams for decades, there'd always been a special level of challenge between the two of them. Captain versus captain. Each of them the physical embodiment of everything they wanted to destroy. To bow to anyone with less power than Claude only added insult to Crosby's injury.That was the difference between them, though, Claude thought. Crosby’s pride drew lines in the sand that way. Claude wasn’t nearly so petty.Mean, sometimes, but not petty.“You were asked a question,” Claude said, slinging his towel to one side.Crosby’s jaw muscle tightened and released once. “I’m following the rules.”“Rules say no rookies, call-ups, or injured players,” Claude pointed out. “Rules don’t say captain has to go.”“I don’t exactly have a lot of other options at the moment.” Crosby’s words were rough, barely getting out of his throat.“You’ve got vets. A’s. That old guy on your fourth line. Or where’s Kunitz? About time he earned his keep, no?”“He’s married,” Crosby said, sounding disgusted. “So’s Cullen.”Claude frowned. “Pens exempt married guys?” He’d never heard of such a thing. Sacrifice was built into everyone’s contracts. They all knew what this was, and it didn’t have anything to do with fucking. Sex was just the thing they used to twist the knife. It wasn’t like the guy getting worked over was supposed to get anything out of it. So what did it matter if a guy had someone at home to ease the humiliation?“Pens don’t. I do.” Crosby’s mouth worked before he managed to clamp it down. “You mind getting down to this already?”Pens don’t, I do. What the hell did that mean? Claude glanced at Simmer, as if he might be able to shed some light, but Simmer, leaning against a partition two stalls down, only shrugged. Claude turned back to Crosby, confusion making his voice sharper. “Yeah, I mind. Answer the fucking question. Why are you here?”The room was dead silent. Claude stood by his stall, careful to keep his arms and legs loose and ready. He didn’t think Crosby would rush him or take a swing or anything, but he’d been wrong before, and if he’d learned anything from a near-decade of rivalry, it was not to underestimate the temper of the man standing opposite him. Crosby was a genial enough guy when everything was going his way, but if you got under his skin, he turned into a creature of teeth and claws and cheap shots. And nothing got under Crosby’s skin like losing.Claude wasn’t interested in handling this with kid gloves, though. The losing team’s sacrifice had a role to fill, and 95% of it was to eat shit politely. If Crosby was going to step up, he needed to step up, no matter how much it burned.Crosby’s gaze shifted, flitting around the edges of the locker room, passing over the dozen-plus guys in assorted states of undress, all of them watching him like he was a snake that might coil and strike at any moment. Waiting to see if he’d argue or push back. If he’d submit.Claude could almost see the wheels turning in Crosby’s head, could sense the fight instinct in him coming to the surface, and that was nothing but trouble. Crosby didn’t go down easy, never had, never would, and if Claude let them start down that road, this whole thing would get ugly fast.Carefully, evenly, Claude said, “I just want to understand your thinking. Make sure we know where we stand. No big deal.”Crosby’s gaze snapped to his, wary. After a moment, though, something in his body language eased back. “We’re running thin. We don’t—” He licked his lips. Not nervously. More like he was irritated with the struggle to find the right words. “It seems like every time we turn around, someone else has gone down. We’ve been handling it, mostly, but it’s…Shearsy might be hurt again, and we’re just…we don’t give up. We never just give up. But today, we…I’m…I have to wake them up.”Crosby clamped his mouth shut and stared over Claude’s shoulder at the wall.Claude considered this. Crosby’s pride was a strange, convoluted thing. No one who knew him doubted that he wanted to win more than he wanted his next breath, and he didn’t give a shit about how he looked crossing that finish line. He’d crawl across it humiliated and disrespected and tell the world to kiss his ass in the process, so long as he got that Cup in the end—that was where the pride came from for him. Maybe he really didn’t mind being here, taking a knee to men who hated him, so long as it paid off in the end.Beyond that, the logistics made sense enough. The Penguins were limping toward the playoffs on the heels of a shortened off-season because of last summer’s win, struggling under the weight of the hockey world’s push for a repeat Cup run for the first time in two decades. They had eight of their regular lineup out with injuries, Crosby had been through a half-dozen line mates so far this season, and Claude was the first to admit that the Pens had been downright easy to beat these last two games. Crosby’s boys were tired and demoralized.This—knowing their captain was getting shamed and gang-banged for them—might be the thing that put the fire back in their bellies.Claude was torn between being impressed by Crosby’s willingness to put himself in this position, and disgust that none of the Pens had flat-out refused to allow it. Claude hadn’t played the sacrifice since he took the C. Simmer and Jakes and Gudy—hell, any of his guys—would’ve opened their veins before they’d let that happen.But the Pens had always been a mystery to him, so Claude let it go. “Fair enough. What’s your safe word?”“Mario.”A couple guys tittered like it was some kind of dirty admission, but Claude nodded. If the specter of a furious Le Magnifique didn’t take away a man’s wood, nothing would. Not that it would be needed. Safewording was rare—no one got too far out of line, since it only took one bad game to find yourself under the thumb of the guy you’d just fucked over. But it existed for a reason, and while there were fines and shit that the losing team would have to pay if the sacrifice did it, Claude had never heard of a team giving a guy a hard time over it.He said, “All right.”It hit him then what this meant. What was about to happen. If it had been anyone else, Claude wouldn’t have blinked. Rivalries were all well and good, but off the ice, they were guys doing a job, and Claude wasn’t going to treat some second-year third-line center trying to make it in the league like a piece of shit after-hours because of the color of his uniform. Yeah, the nature of the sacrifice system was rough, but that was an inherent thing. Claude didn’t need to add anything to it by being a dick.But this…this was different. This was…Criss. He didn’t even know what to think. Sidney Crosby, the NHL’s golden boy, the darling of the league, the man who’d once tried to get to the Cup by running through Claude as violently as possible, was…his.“Take your shit off,” Claude said.Crosby’s gaze snapped to Claude’s, and the moment hung. Everyone held very still. The air in the room seemed to thicken.And after a heartbeat, Crosby began to strip.His skin was pale, except for some bruises. Two were green and yellow, the memory of another team splashed across his ribs, but one was big and only starting to purple, settled over his flank. The work of a Flyer. He didn’t have much body hair. He was leaner than he’d been when Claude had seen him at the World Cup in September, rawboned after seventy games on a skeleton crew, but Crosby would never appear to be anything but powerful. He didn’t get smaller or weaker; he only got more concentrated.Still, no way was he two hundred pounds right now, no matter what his bio claimed.“You need more calories,” Claude mused, watching him kick his clothes to one side, and Crosby gave him a look that plainly said are you kidding me right now, asshole?Claude smirked. Fuck, it was fun to mess with this bastard.Crosby stood perfectly still, letting the men in the room study him, his chin high, seemingly unbothered by his nudity. Maybe he really wasn’t; he certainly didn’t have reason to feel otherwise. His mouth and ass were practically Canadian national treasures, and while he wasn’t the best looking guy in the league, he was definitely the best looking guy in this room. Not that it was a high bar; half the competition never bothered to wear their dentures.The only thing Claude hadn’t seen was his dick. They’d shared locker rooms before on international teams, but it wasn’t like he’d looked. Only now was he free to stare as much as he wanted, and he wasn’t disappointed. Crosby wasn’t hiding a monster between his thighs or anything—Claude was probably longer unless Crosby was a substantial grower—but like everything else about his lower body, Crosby’s dick was thick, wide as a man’s wrist even flaccid.Claude raised his eyes. Crosby was staring back at him, unbowed by the attention. Even in this, when Crosby was supposed to be penitent and vulnerable, he stood there like a damn king surveying his kingdom.Claude was suddenly struck with an urge to shred him. To make all of that quiet confidence leak away until desperation was all that was left.It was hardly a new feeling, but for the first time, he had the clear upper hand.“Someone get a cushion for his majesty here,” Claude said. “Imagine the noise we’ll get if we aren’t careful with his delicate knees. And get some lube and shit, too. We’re not fucking running a dating service here.”Crosby rolled his eyes.“Aw, don’t worry, precious, we’re getting to you,” Simmer told him, and someone snickered. Crosby’s cheeks flushed a dull, angry red.A couple guys went to the small cabinet kept stocked exactly for this purpose, and a second later a cushion flopped onto the floor in front of Claude. He nudged it into place with one foot before sinking onto the bench and leaning back, the partition between his stall and Simmer’s sturdy enough to support his weight.“C’mon.” Claude jerked his chin at Crosby. “Get over here.”Crosby took his dear old sweet time about it, a tiny fuck you that only made the warm itch of Claude’s urge to break him that much stronger. Claude was starting to get that good, down-low heaviness—he’d be hard very soon, and he wanted to be in Crosby’s mouth when it happened.“You ever sucked a dick?” he asked, when Crosby was finally kneeling in front of him.Crosby’s jaw tightened. “Are we sixteen now? You want to pass notes in class about which one of us has gone further?”Claude sighed. “I’m not trying to pry into your business, you paranoid prick. I’m trying to make sure you don’t bite my dick off on accident.”“If I bite your dick off, it won’t be an accident,” Crosby replied flatly, making half the locker room laugh and the other half hiss at his insolence.Claude waved a hand at him, already tired of Crosby’s shit. “Fine, keep your secrets, asshole. But consider where you are before you start taking nips out of people, eh? Now get that pretty mouth started.”Crosby’s lips went thin, but he reached up to tug open the flap in Claude’s boxer-briefs. Claude shook his head, lifting his hips instead, and Crosby went with it, tugging the underwear down Claude’s thighs and off his feet instead. Crosby threw them over his shoulder without looking and managed to almost catch Simmer in the face, something that Claude was certain had been purposeful. He chuckled a little, both at the snarl of offense Simmer gave and the resulting, self-satisfied gleam in Crosby’s eyes.That gleam was only visible for a few seconds though, because Crosby’s gaze fell, landing on Claude’s dick. Crosby’s expression was carefully neutral. It was his media face, probably, and that pissed Claude off further, the way Crosby was still so damn above it all, so removed from the situation. Crosby might as well have been watching paint dry for all the interest he showed.Which…probably meant it was an act, now that he thought about it.Claude had been in the league for a long time now, and the one thing that was true? The only guys who played the sacrifice without getting nervous were the vets who’d done it a million times, who’d bent the knee to so many rival rookies high on life that they never blinked twice at any kind of sexual humiliation a situation could offer. Those guys, the ones who truly didn’t give a shit anymore, they made jokes about come and bitched about how giving hand jobs made their wrists ache these days and told the younger guys to hurry up so no one would miss the bus.Crosby wasn’t one of those guys, and this blank media expression was bullshit. He was burning. Down deep, where he wouldn’t have to acknowledge it, this was burning him something fierce.“Suck me,” Claude said, and Crosby did.His mouth was wet and hot and soft. Good, if a bit disinterested. Claude traced his thumb along Crosby’s cheekbone, then slipped his hand up on the top of Crosby’s head. “Deeper.”Crosby paused, glaring up at Claude in warning, but Claude didn’t push, just trailed his fingers through those dark curls and waited for Crosby to get back to it. The eye contact held for a long minute, a subtle battle of wills, and abruptly Crosby dropped his gaze and took Claude so deep that he had to be halfway down Crosby’s throat.“Fuck,” he whispered.Crosby’d had a dick or ten in his mouth before, that was for damn sure. Claude’s eyes were rolling back in his head with the force of the suction he was getting, and his heart kicked double-speed in his chest.The locker room had grown quiet again, but for the occasional slick sounds of a few guys jerking off. No one was likely to come yet—they could get off with their hands at home, after all—but Claude could admit that Crosby made a tempting picture like this, down on his knees, bent over Claude’s lap, his muscled back strong, the nape of his neck unguarded. Claude could feel the scrape of Crosby’s gold chain against his leg every now and then as Crosby worked him over, the little 87 catching on the hair of his thighs.It had only been a few minutes, but Claude’s gut was tightening, his skin warming, and before he could second guess himself, he dug his fingers into Crosby’s hair and pulled his head up.“What?” Crosby snarled, jerking away. He rocked back on his heels, wiping his mouth with the back of his hand. “Just fucking finish already, huh?”Claude watched him for a minute, not saying anything, letting his body calm down. He studied Crosby’s lips—red and a bit swollen—and tried not to think of what it had felt like, because the point was to chill, not come. So he looked Crosby over elsewhere too.He wasn’t hard. Claude hadn’t expected him to be. He figured Crosby was running plays in his head instead of thinking about how to make it good. Claude would too, in his place. That didn’t mean Claude had to like it.“Who’s next?” Claude asked the room at large, and a few of the guys whooped and started jostling. Someone turned some music on, one of Del Zotto’s playlists instantly recognizable, the low, throbbing beat fitting the mood perfectly.“You didn’t come,” Crosby said, eyes narrowing.“No shit.” Claude glanced up, saw Simmer hovering over them. “You got a preference, buddy?”“I want that ass,” Simmer said baldly, making Crosby scowl. “Don’t much care how I get it.”“Good.” Claude reached out and pressed his thumb to Crosby’s lower lip. Surprisingly, Crosby didn’t pull away. “You’re gonna suck me while Simmer fucks you. And if I come before he does, I’m gonna make you suck me off again after everyone else is done. Understand?”“I speak English, don’t I?” Crosby intoned and reached up, catching Simmer’s wrist in his hand and yanking, hard enough that Simmer came down to one knee, startled and furious. Crosby said evenly, “I have practice tomorrow. I better be able to play.”Simmer twisted free and gave Crosby a shove, hard enough that it probably hurt, but not hard enough to knock Crosby to one side. No surprise really. If you couldn’t shove him off the puck when he was on the ice, how far was he going to go when he was kneeling on carpet?“He knows the rules,” Claude admonished. “Don’t be a dick.” Crosby ignored him and bent back over his lap, taking Claude into his mouth once more.Simmer was muttering under his breath as he circled to get behind Crosby, opening the lube and pouring a substantial amount in his palm at the same time. A very substantial amount. After closing the lid again with a snick, he slapped the whole handful onto Crosby’s left buttock, splattering it everywhere. Crosby jolted in fury and tried to lift his head, but Claude gently held him still, muttering, “Let it go, c’mon.”Over Crosby’s back, Claude gave Simmer a dirty look. “Remember where his teeth are, eh?”Simmer grinned and got started.Claude leaned back, closing his eyes. Crosby’s mouth wasn’t nearly as adept now. More than half of the guy’s attention was on whatever Simmer was doing to his ass, and without having to work so hard not to come, it was easy to lose track of everything and focus the long, slow pleasure unfurling in his gut. The squelching of lube came to him over the music, and he floated for a bit, aware of little else but the sensation of Crosby’s tongue until suddenly Crosby went still and grunted.Claude opened his eyes. Simmer’s hand was hard to see past the rise of Crosby’s ass—the thing really was impressive—but the small movements of his elbow showed that he was prodding deep rather than thrusting his fingers in and out. Crosby let out a second, more-strangled sound.“Right there, huh?” Simmonds murmured, his tone only half-mocking. He was watching the taut line of Crosby’s back like he’d never seen anything so fascinating. His arm moved again and again, and Crosby lurched forward, away from Simmer’s hand, taking Claude deeper inadvertently his attempt to escape, and choking himself in the process. He started to lift his head again, and Claude held him gently in place once more.“No,” Claude told him. “You came here. You volunteered to do this. If Simmer wants to get you hard, you’ll get hard.”Crosby went still, every muscle in his body rigid, his eyes angry where they stared unblinking at Claude’s belly. It took a minute, but his mouth started back up. Simmer’s arm began moving again too.“That good enough for you, your majesty?” Simmer asked after a while. “You’re wet and soft as a girl now.”Crosby didn’t respond in any way, but a lack of complaint was usually an answer in and of itself with Crosby, so Simmer dried his hand on a towel. Once he’d nudged Crosby’s thighs a bit further apart to give himself more room, he began easing in.Claude let Crosby lift his head when he resisted this time, figuring it was reasonable, given that Simmer was wedging a big dick inside of him now. Crosby’s eyes were closed, his brow creased in anger or concentration as he blew out a breath.“Fuck, that’s good,” Simmer muttered. “Fuck, fuck, that’s…fuck, Crosby, I always knew you’d be a tight ass. Loosen up.”Crosby snarled something that got choked off as Simmer eased deeper.“Relax,” Claude murmured, stroking Crosby’s temple. “Breathe.”The gesture seemed to reorient Crosby’s attention. He exhaled again, long and even, before his head dropped to rest on Claude’s thigh. Claude’s chest went warm unexpectedly. “There you go,” he whispered, combing through Crosby’s hair, weirdly gratified when Crosby shuddered. His breath was hot on Claude’s skin.“I’m in,” Simmer said, sounding strangled. “Fuck.”He waited a minute to allow Crosby a chance to adjust before he started moving, setting a slow, easy rhythm. It seemed a shame to remind Crosby of what he should be doing—there was something sweet about the way he’d buried his face against Claude’s leg—but the sight of Simmer rocking into the guy was making his own dick eager. So he tugged on Crosby’s hair and got him back where he wanted him. Crosby’s mouth was distracted, frequently falling still until Claude nudged him back into action, but Claude didn’t mind. It kept his arousal alive but not overwhelming. He wanted this to last.When Simmer had groaned out his climax with a last flurry of thrusts, Bellemare stepped up. He gave a nod to Claude, slid between Crosby’s legs and patted one ass cheek until Crosby seemed to get that he was asking permission and waved a hand in a get on with it kind of motion over his shoulder. It didn’t take long. Only a few minutes of impersonal thrusts got him to come, and he pulled out like he’d done nothing more exciting than watching a couple of infomercials. He headed for the showers, and Jakes came up.“Mind if I put him on his back?” he asked Claude, who shrugged. He kind of liked the idea of Crosby sucking him the whole night, like Crosby’s mouth was his and his alone, but it was a selfish urge, and he wouldn’t be a very good captain if he didn’t share a little.So he sank back and lazily tugged on his dick as he watched Jakes roll Crosby over and shove the cushion under his hips. Crosby went easily enough, though he turned his head toward the wall and closed his eyes. He seemed tense in this new position, not liking the exposure maybe. Jakes lined up and pushed in, fucking Crosby with short, fast strokes that, by the end, had Crosby shifting like he was in discomfort.Jakes seemed to realize it too, but only on the verge of climax. He came hard, and when he pulled out he was frowning. He knelt there uncertainly for a second. “Sorry.”Crosby shook his head. “Forget it.”“Say if you’re getting sore or something,” Claude said. He grabbed a nearby sweaty towel and threw it on Crosby’s face.“Fuck off,” Crosby snapped, hurling the towel back without sitting up.“Don’t just let us hurt you, for fuck’s sake.”“I’d have said something in a minute, but your concern is touching,” Crosby replied, because he was a prick. Claude rolled his eyes. Let him be miserable. Let him end up raw if he wanted; it was his own fault if he was too proud to speak up right away.That determination lasted about five seconds. As he watched Del Zotto and Reader take Jakes’ place beside Crosby, Claude sighed, annoyed at himself. “Use more lube, guys.”Crosby stared at him, a slight crease between his eyebrows. Claude returned the look stonily, and eventually Crosby turned away.As Del Zotto used a good palmful of lube to slick himself up, Reader straddled Crosby’s chest and murmured, “Would you open your mouth, please?”When Crosby obeyed, Reader guided his cock inside, bracing his upper body on the nearest bench and keeping most of his weight on his knees. He began to slowly fuck Crosby’s face, gentle and tidy about the whole thing, polite as only Reader could be. Meanwhile, Del Zotto hefted Crosby’s legs and slid in. Claude watched Crosby for more signs that it hurt, but the lube had fixed the problem, it appeared.After a few minutes, Del Zotto cried out and finished, getting up and going to the showers shakily. Reader took longer, probing deeply into Crosby’s mouth, careful to make sure Crosby had time to breathe in what had to be the most respectful and delicate face-fucking Claude had ever seen. Crosby seemed all right with it—his hands kept opening and closing on his belly like he wanted to reach up and maybe pull Reader deeper. His dick kept twitching, too, and even without any more stimulation to his prostate he was still half-hard. It was surprisingly hot, maybe because it looked—for the first time—like Crosby was a participant instead of an object. It…it looked good on him, Claude decided, though he knew that was supposed to be a bad thing. The point was humiliation. The point was to diminish Crosby and teach him his place, not to please him, not to gratify him. But as Reader’s hand came down to cup Crosby’s cheek and tilt his head back, Crosby let out a soft moan that was quickly muffled.Claude’s dick—which he’d been half-heartedly jerking this whole time—got harder.Reader said, “I’d like you to swallow, okay?”Crosby gave a low rumble of agreement when he could, and Reader’s hips jerked a few times, rougher than he’d been so far and yet still not enough to make Crosby choke, and he came with a groan. Crosby swallowed it all like a pro.“Would you like me to make you come?” Reader asked, and a couple of the guys hooted. Reader ignored them, rubbing a hand in circles over Crosby’s sternum as he waited for an answer. Crosby flushed a little pink, blinking like he wasn’t sure how to respond, and finally said, “No, but thanks for the offer.”Reader nodded, gave him a last pat, and got up.Manning came up next, his eyes intent and hard on Crosby’s sprawled body. One of his hands was already stroking lube onto his cock. He glanced at Claude, jerked his head in a little question, and Claude felt an absurd urge to say no. Manning was a physical guy, capable of substantial bloodthirstiness, and all it would take to set him off was the opportunity to press a line with a guy who had more than him. This was going to come very close to the edge, and a small, strange part of Claude didn’t like the idea at all.But that was the point, he told himself, and nodded.Manning rolled him over, but he wasn’t satisfied with Crosby on his hands and knees—he put a palm between Crosby’s shoulder blades and shoved down, forcing his face to the carpet. Every muscle in Crosby’s body went steel-taut, his hands making fists on the floor even as Manning pushed between his thighs and thrust inside hard enough to drive a harsh exhale from Crosby’s lungs.“You’ve always thought you were better than us,” Manning muttered, his grip punishing on Crosby’s hips, forcing him to hold still. “Well, you’re not better now, are you, you whore? Take it. Take every inch.”Crosby tried to push himself up, but Manning had all the leverage, and he shoved him back down. “You can fight if you want to. I don’t mind it. I’ll put you down as many times as it takes. Maybe that’s what you want, huh? You like it rough, Crosby?”“Fuck you.”Manning laughed. “Think it’s going the other way, Kid.”Crosby stared viciously at the far wall, his cheeks bright red, and Manning paused, adjusting his angle with little pulses of his hips, until suddenly Crosby gasped and stiffened.“There we go,” Manning snarled. “Right like that. Gonna make you like it.”Crosby’s knuckles went white, his expression twisting like he’d prefer to tell Manning to go fuck himself, and for a second, when Crosby started to really struggle, Claude thought he was about to have a fistfight on his hands.“Do you need to safe word?” he asked, and Crosby abruptly went still. Manning’s thrusts slowed.“Crosby,” Claude said. “Say the word and it’s done.”“No.” Crosby’s voice was hoarse, but certain.Claude almost left it there. Almost. It wasn’t his fucking business or his problem, and while Manning was an asshole on a good day, he was team. That should’ve been a hell of a lot more important than Sidney Crosby’s pride, but none of that seemed to matter when Manning started pounding into Crosby again, one hand going around and down to grab at his dick, squeezing enough to make him gasp.Suddenly Claude was asking, “Do you want him to make you come, Crosby?”Manning’s hips jittered to a stop again. They were both looking at him now. Hell, everyone was. Claude well remembered what he’d said earlier—you volunteered. If Simmer wants to get you hard, you’ll get hard—and yeah, maybe he was contradicting himself, but he didn’t care. The tone here was different enough that Claude wasn’t comfortable with it, and the point was humility, not abuse.Crosby’s gaze was heavy on Claude’s face, his thoughts impossible to discern. Suspicion was in there, Claude thought, but there were other things too, things that he wasn’t entirely comfortable defining.“No,” Crosby said finally. “I don’t want to come.”Claude nodded at Manning meaningfully. “You heard him. Get off, then get lost.”Manning cursed under his breath, but he let go of Crosby’s dick.Claude wasn’t sure he’d done Crosby any favors in the end, though. It mostly seemed to piss Manning off, and if Crosby had planned to get out of here without a few bruises, he’d lost that bet already.Manning was spewing all sorts of filth now, calling Crosby a cock-hungry whore, a little bitch, a Cindy Crybaby, and grinning about it throughout. Any time Manning drew a grunt or a sharp inhale out of Crosby he puffed up more, proud of himself for his roughness, until he had to be near to choking on his superiority. The shame Claude had wished for earlier, that this whole enterprise was meant to cause, was burning from every line of Crosby’s face and body, and the comparison between his own thoughts and the reality in front of him made him a little seasick. Claude wondered when and if Crosby would say the safe word, even started to hope that he would, but Crosby remained completely silent.That silence turned out to be an effective weapon, however; as the minutes passed and Crosby didn’t yield, Manning’s expression grew stormier, his frustration visible. He got rougher, but Crosby still didn’t say a word, and now there was a grim pleasure in the tilt of Crosby’s head, in the way he held his mouth. It was the same face he made on the ice when he came to the dot for the last faceoff of a nasty game that he was nonetheless going to win.Manning pushed harder, spoke his filth louder, and despite the humiliation riding him, despite the sweat on his skin and the weariness in his shoulders, Crosby didn’t break and didn’t break and didn’t break, just stared at the carpet, flat and certain and made of steel.When he thought enough time had passed that he could claim he was speaking up not on Crosby’s behalf but for the interest of the other players who were waiting, Claude said, “Wrap it up, Manning.”Manning tossed him a sullen glower, but put his back into it. He came with near-violent force before pulling out with the disinterest of a child with a toy he’d tired of. He left Crosby on the floor breathing hard, completely wrecked, red marks all over his skin from where Manning’s hands, marks that would be bruises by tomorrow. Several of the guys had apparently found the scene to their tastes; Manning wasn’t the only one who headed for the showers.“Jesus,” Schenner murmured in the ensuing, heavy quiet. He looked rocked. Schenner had never seemed particularly inclined to like Crosby, and Claude was pretty sure the feeling was mutual after the cross-check Schenner had given him after the whistle during a game last year, but this was different from some on-ice rough housing. Schenner was a good kid, and this was different.It was only once the buzz of adrenaline began to fade from his blood that Claude realized he’d been anticipating a fight. That he’d been willing to fight, if Manning hadn’t obeyed. Feeling like a stranger in his own skin, Claude went to Crosby and knelt at his side, aware of the eyes on him. It made him a little clumsy, and he tried to keep his motions business-like. Just a captain making sure the sacrifice was in one piece. He put a hand on Crosby’s shoulder and froze. Crosby was trembling.“You all right?” Claude asked quietly.Crosby muttered, “He pissed me off, that’s all.”Claude wasn’t stupid enough to believe the lie, so he stayed there for a few minutes, petting Crosby’s back like he was a cat or something, feeling stupid and frustrated and awkward as the others watched his ham-handed attempts to be kind to a man he’d always thought of as an enemy. When Crosby’s trembling finally subsided, though, most of Claude’s anxiety faded beneath a burst of relief that he tried hard to ignore.“This is enough, don’t you think?” Claude asked. “You’ve gotten through—”“I’m fine. Bring it.” Crosby was still hoarse, but there was nothing hesitant in his tone.“You know I won’t—”“I said bring it.”Claude studied him for a second, his hand still resting on Crosby’s back. “We don’t give up,” Crosby had said earlier, although it would’ve been more accurate to say that Crosby didn’t. And in the face of such a heavy attempt to break him down, Claude found himself bizarrely proud of this asshole for not tapping out. Perhaps, even, in awe. It would’ve been such an easy thing to end it—a single word, that was all—and after the nasty undertone of what’d gone down, Claude didn’t think anybody in the room would blame him, but Crosby hadn’t broken. Manning had humiliated and used him, but Crosby would be back on the ice for the next game secure in the knowledge that Manning hadn’t been able to make him yield.Half-admiring, half-exasperated, Claude shook his head. “You’re a stubborn fucker.”“Takes one to know one.”Claude bit back a laugh. He liked the idea that Crosby thought of him as strong in this same way, and he couldn’t stop the smile, not even when he noticed Coots’s watchful gaze as he stood up to make room for whoever was next.“Schenner,” he said. “Do something dirty to this idiot, yeah?”Crosby huffed, but it wasn’t angry. If anything, it echoed the exasperated, reluctant respect that was beginning to color everything about this for Claude too.Schenner knelt beside Crosby and put a tentative hand on his hip before using gentle fingers to part his buttocks and study the pink, delicate skin of Crosby’s asshole. Even from where he sat, Claude could see the come dripping out over Crosby’s balls. Schenner touched him gingerly, testing how sore he was, and Crosby nodded encouragement, so Schenner slid his fingers inside, his eyes going dark in the process.Schenner began stroking himself with one hand while he used the other to press all of that thick come deeper inside Crosby’s body, to search inside him. Crosby lay quietly through all of it, his head pillowed on his arms, giving the occasional sigh or moan when something Schenner did felt particularly good. At one point he spread his legs wider of his own volition to give Schenner more room to work, a move that had Schenner making a harsh sound through his teeth and coming all over Crosby’s ass. When he’d recovered, he pushed his own come inside of Crosby too, terribly gentle, and finished by bending and giving Crosby a small, impulsive kiss on the back of one strong thigh.Crosby turned his head, his steady gaze lifting to meet Schenner’s. In a low voice, he said, “That was much nicer, thank you.”Schenner blushed and stammered, “Oh, sure, you’re welcome,” before he all but fled the locker room.“He’s never going to be able to cross-check you again,” Claude said, mildly annoyed but resigned to it, and Crosby laughed softly, low and throaty. He sounded…he sounded aroused. Or at least like Schenner’s touch had been pleasant. It seemed Claude had something else to add to his understanding of Crosby. Before will break your wrists, but after claims he doesn’t hit people, there was a new entry: likes to be fucked sweet.Crosby watched Claude for a long few seconds, his dark eyes unreadable, his skin flushed warm like it’d been when he’d lay under Reader’s polite hands and gentle moves. There was something easy about Crosby now, like some seed of uncertainty had vanished.Like he’d decided he was safe here after all.Neuvy and Mason put Crosby on one of the benches on his back, head hanging free over one end, then proceeded to spit-roast him. Crosby was compliant, if unexcited at first. But Mason was careful, using more lube than he probably needed before cupping Crosby’s ass and grinding in slow and deep. He touched Crosby with firm, appreciative hands and murmured to him in a hoarse whisper that Claude couldn’t make out, words that sounded complimentary and left Crosby pink-cheeked and a little flustered. Yes, Crosby definitely liked it sweet; soon enough his dick was hard against his belly. He opened his mouth without being asked so that Neuvy could slide inside, and he seemed to be legitimately sucking, judging from the wide-eyed awe that Neuvy directed at him. Mason seemed to have found a good angle, too, because soon enough Crosby was moving between them, small, subtle undulations that proved he was enjoying himself just fine.After a bit, Neuvy whispered something that had Crosby lifting a hand to rub encouragingly at Neuvy’s hip, and moments later he pulled out to come on Crosby’s face. Crosby didn’t protest, just waited with his eyes closed until Mason came too, before asking quietly for a towel.“I gotcha,” Neuvy said, and he wiped Crosby’s face clean with something approaching affection. When he’d tossed the towel aside, he guided Crosby up to sit and perched on the bench beside him, leaning in to cup Crosby’s chin with one hand and kiss him. Crosby jerked back, visibly shocked, but Neuvy followed, gentle and easy, lingering patiently against Crosby’s mouth until, after a brief hesitation, Crosby opened up, letting Neuvy lick inside. He allowed the kiss but only tentatively returned it, and the sight of it left Claude with an ache in his chest.He had to look away, and he distracted himself by grabbing a bottle of water from the small fridge. Only after Neuvy had pulled away to go shower did he go to Crosby and hold the water out. When he tipped his head back to drink, Claude put a hand on the nape of his neck as if to steady him, all too aware of the bullshit nature of it. He was touching Crosby solely because he wanted to, and it had nothing to do with sacrifice or putting Crosby in his place. There was no way to put Crosby in his place, Claude suspected, and he was only now beginning to realize that he didn’t actually want to. He wanted Crosby like this, with his anger banked and his will intact, his skin sweaty under Claude’s fingertips, his eyes trained on Claude’s face as he lowered the water bottle.“How do you feel?” Claude asked him.Crosby jerked a shoulder. “Fine.”“No safe word?”“I’m all right, Giroux,” Crosby said, but he didn’t sound irritated so much as thoughtful. Or perhaps curious was a better word for it. “Thanks for the water.”“We’re not animals,” Claude said dryly, and Crosby snorted, glancing away, no doubt thinking of Manning.Before he could stop himself, Claude stroked his thumb protectively over Crosby’s neck. It made Crosby shiver, and Claude wasn’t sure why, if it was the sensation of Claude’s touch or if it’d been an involuntary reaction to the thought of Manning. He had an absurd urge to tell Crosby that he didn’t have to be afraid, that Manning had gotten everything he was entitled to with Crosby and that Claude wouldn’t allow him to try to take more.It was stupid. Crosby didn’t need protecting, and even if he did, it wasn’t Claude’s job.Confused and irritated about it, Claude pulled his hand away from Crosby’s skin and gestured Konecny closer.The young forward hesitated, hovering, almost wringing his hands, and Claude sighed, wondering what kink he wanted to indulge that had him tied up in knots. He opened his mouth to point out that this was probably the closest he was going to get to risk-free experimentation, but Crosby got there first. Not unkindly, he said, “Spit it out, kid. What do you want?”Konecny took a bolstering breath. “Can I rim you? It’s just…your ass…”Crosby paused, taken aback, and then shrugged. “It’s your dime.”“You want uh, a dam or something?” Claude asked doubtfully, thinking about the mess of lube and come that coated Crosby’s ass and thighs by this point. But Konecny had already grabbed a clean towel, and he waved it in the air in answer, going to the sink and wetting it down with warm water.“I want to suck his dick,” Gudy said in his low voice. “That cool with you, Croz?”Crosby nodded slowly. “I mean, if um, your buddy doesn’t mind sharing.”“He doesn’t mind,” Gudy said at the same time that Konecny said, “I don’t mind.” Konecny smiled at their harmony, sending a bashful smile at Gudy.Claude and Coots exchanged a glance of did you know about this? before Claude decided that this was something that he would have to deal with tomorrow. He had enough on his plate at the moment, so he just gave his defenseman a pointed look and gestured for him to sit on the bench at his left. Crosby got up like he was stiff at first, and he didn’t get any more relaxed when Konecny knelt behind him, towel ready.“I can do that,” Crosby said, holding his hand out for the towel.Konecny shook his head. “I’d like to, if that’s okay?”Crosby flushed, shifting his weight from foot to foot before he finally sighed and turned, letting Konecny sidle up behind him and begin wiping him down. Konecny was thorough, lingering, an expression of worship taking over his face as he touched and held and cupped Crosby’s ass in the process. By the time he tossed the towel aside, he was down on one knee like a parishioner about to genuflect, and Crosby seemed on the verge of combusting from nerves.“You’re so fucking gorgeous here." Konecny gently spread Crosby's buttocks, looking his fill and making Crosby's blush deepen further in the process. Konecny frowned. “You ever had this done before?”“No, I, uh, no." Crosby was so focused on what Konecny was doing--even though he was still just looking--that he startled when Gudy cupped his hip in one palm."Man, what a waste. You're built for this. Look how pretty you are." Konecny shook his head like the idea of Crosby going through life without getting rimmed was a travesty, sliding a thumb over Crosby's exposed hole. Crosby made a choked, uncertain sound, his face blazing bright red all the way to the tips of his ears, and Konecny hurried to add, "No, don't be embarrassed, God. You're gonna taste so good. You have any idea how long I've been thinking about doing this to you? Since I was like, fifteen. You’re a work of art here, didn't you know that?"The playlist ran out, but Claude didn’t care. Coots was the only other free person in the room and he didn’t seem inclined to put on anything else either. They were both too busy watching their rookie single-handedly get Sidney Crosby as shy and flustered as a damn virgin.As if he couldn't help himself, Konecny leaned in and gently raked his teeth across the firm curve of one cheek, making Crosby jolt and lurch forward. Gudy held him still with that hand on his hip and Konecny soothed him with a tiny kiss. "Easy," he murmured. "Easy. I'm gonna make it good for you. You can say if you don't like it, but let me try first, okay, let me show you how good it can be.”The first touch of lips was cautious, Konecny’s gaze flickering up to catch what he could of Crosby’s reaction. Claude wasn’t sure how much Konecny could see, but he didn’t think it was anything to worry about. In only a handful of seconds, Crosby’s whole body was bowing forward, his breath stuttering, a groan emerging rough and thick from his throat.He might’ve collapsed forward onto the bench but for Gudy, who ran his hand up Crosby’s belly, pushing him upright so there’d be room for him to work too. He leaned in and took Crosby’s rapidly hardening dick into his mouth, humming like he was pleased with it, and seconds later, Crosby wobbled hard on his feet and had to brace himself against the stall partition. His eyes fell closed. His head dropped back.Claude had fucked a lot of men through the sacrifice system over the years, and it was almost second nature now to catalog how a guy looked. He'd had almost ten years to get used to Crosby's face across the faceoff dot, and as if that wasn't enough, Crosby appeared in half the shit the NHL put out. Claude had had plenty of time to note every detail and flaw. But he’d never seen Crosby like this. What Manning had tried and failed to bully Crosby into giving, Konecny and Gudy now successfully coaxed from him. Under their gentle mouths, Crosby began to unravel. He wasn’t even trying to fight it.He was lovely, Claude realized. Lovely and eager and lost and overwhelmed all at once, his mouth open and panting, his back arching, hips jogging like he wasn’t sure whether to press back into Konecny’s mouth or forward into Gudy’s. Crosby’s hand tightened on the partition until his knuckles turned white.When Konecny pulled back, Crosby let out a distinctive noise of complaint.“I’m not done,” Konecny said, his voice thick, his eyes heavy-lidded. “God, I’m so not done, just…can you, um, hold your cheeks open for me? I…your ass is…it’s perfect, fuck, but I can’t get in as deep as I—” He broke off when Crosby reached down, pulling his buttocks apart and exposing his hole.Claude leaned forward, trying to see, and he caught a glimpse of Konecny’s enraptured expression as he dove back in. Crosby jerked as if he’d been shot, and without the music, the wet sounds of their two mouths working was perfectly audible. No small wonder that Crosby was moaning, low and thin at first, but louder as things proceeded. Gudy and Konecny were both jerking themselves now, unhurried, as if they’d decided together to make this last.Gudy did something that Crosby must’ve liked, because he let out a sound that could only be termed a whine, and he wobbled dangerously on his feet.Claude was up and moving before he could think of it, circling Gudy and straddling the bench without sitting down, close enough that he could wrap an arm around Crosby’s waist and steady him. Criss, he was a heavy bastard, but Claude liked it. Crosby was even lovelier up close like this, his forehead creased, his eyelashes long and dark, his mouth open and pink. Claude thought of Neuvy kissing him, of the way Crosby had reacted as if torn between the urge to kiss back or to pull away, and Claude wanted to know if Crosby would react that way to him, if the considering glances he’d been getting since he’d intervened with Manning meant anything. He wanted everything.Before he could talk himself out of it, Claude kissed him, demanding and too rough, sliding his tongue inside. Crosby yielded instantly, showing none of the hesitation Neuvy had gotten. Instead, he tried to crowd closer, and Claude deepened the kiss, slanting his head, his pulse pounding with the urge to take, to own. He tightened his grip on Crosby, who’d begun making soft, high-pitched sounds in the back of his throat, arching closer, and Claude kissed him harder, held him harder, and wished he could suck the very air out of Crosby’s lungs.Crosby wrenched his mouth away, gasping out, “I’m close, God, I’m gonna, you—”Gudy and Konecny both pulled away, though they didn’t stop jerking themselves. A minute passed, then two, and Crosby spent that time staring at Claude’s mouth, blinking hazily, before he finally nodded. Gudy and Konecny went back to work, stroking themselves faster now, and Crosby listed forward, his interest plain, and Claude thought what the fuck am I doing, right before he took Crosby’s mouth again.They did that a few more times—getting Crosby close before calming him down, and Crosby got more and more edged with each rendition, his skin sweat-slicked and hot to the touch, his mouth downright needy.Konecny came. As he stumbled to his feet, he whispered, “Thank you."Crosby mumbled, “yeah, yeah,” against Claude’s lips before diving back in.There was the click of the cap on the lube once again. Crosby’s body rocked against Claude’s in a new way, less like he was searching for contact and more like he’d been gently pushed, and with the three brain cells that weren’t currently either wrapped up in the lush, wet heat of Crosby’s mouth or freaking out about how much he was enjoying the lush, wet heat of Crosby’s mouth, he realized Coots had come over and was prepping Crosby to be fucked once more. Every push of Coots’ fingers had Crosby’s hips shifting, and Claude wanted Crosby moving like this because of him, not Gudy, not Coots. He imagined reaching down, stroking that thick cock. Imagined being the one to give Crosby a spine-bending orgasm, imagined fucking him.Funny that a simple fantasy and a kiss could be a million times hotter than the earlier blow job he’d wrested from Crosby, that uninvolved, cold reluctance. No, Claude wanted Crosby on his dick just like this, hot and eager and exhilarating.Gudy came with a cry and Claude thought—when Coots is done, if Crosby’s not too sore, I can fuck him then, I can know what it’s like.He was vaguely aware of Gudy easing out from against Crosby’s front. He was more aware of the cool hand that landed on his forearm and tugged him over to sit on the bench, partially because he was forced to stop kissing in the meantime. He was vividly, terrifyingly aware when Crosby was nudged to straddle him on the bench, their hard cocks brushing for a heartbeat.“Yeah, G?” Coots was whispering, and Claude nodded helplessly. Coots made a soft huff of amusement, then said, “Up, Crosby, lean up.” There was a wet hand on Claude’s dick now—Coots’s—and then Crosby was sinking down on him, taking him as deep as he could from this angle. The sensation of being inside him was intense, and Claude’s head fell back against the stall wall with a thud.Crosby chased him in, though, already kissing him again, and for a second, Claude couldn’t think. He could only feel as his dick was clenched tight, as Crosby worked over him, up and down, up and down, until suddenly it stopped.Claude felt something brush unexpectedly against his balls and jumped; at the same time, Crosby opened his eyes, the dazed fog in them clearing. “What are you—Couturier, you’re—”“Shh,” Coots said. “I’m gonna open you up really good first. Breathe. Relax.”“I don’t—”“Kiss G,” Coots said, and Claude was embarrassed by how much he wanted to say, yes, kiss me.Instead, Claude said, “Do you want to stop? We can. Just say the word.”The safe word, he meant, but after a heartbeat of uncertainty, Crosby shook his head. “No,” he whispered. “I—it’s all right.” He turned his head, though, and a trace of the Crosby that Claude knew best reared his head once more. “You better use a fuckton of lube, Couturier. Go slow. I have-”“You have practice tomorrow. I know, I know.” Coots laughed, and his palm rested against the shaft of Claude’s dick as he rubbed at Crosby’s rim. “Fucking kiss G already. I’ve got this.”Crosby took another minute to glare at nothing, then resumed staring down at Claude, who tried to ignore the odd sensations that came with Coots working Crosby open while Claude was still inside him. Crosby’s body was giving little jerks, and his brow was creased as he tried to relax, and none of it was the lovely arousal that Claude wanted to see, so he reached down and took Crosby’s dick in hand, stroking with lingering, curious fingers. He’d been right earlier—Crosby wasn’t long when he was hard, but he was thick as hell.“Slower,” Claude told Coots, who nodded, and Crosby’s gaze softened a bit as it fell back to Claude’s mouth. That was as much of a sign as Claude needed, and however stupid or strange this impulse might be, he wasn’t particularly inclined to fight it. He kissed Crosby again, loving the way those plush lips parted for him, the way Crosby let him inside despite the self-consciousness and hesitancy. Claude kissed him harder, putting a hand in Crosby’s hair to tilt his head how he wanted it, and Crosby sucked in a breath, some of his nerves replaced by renewed urgency.Coots had taken Claude at his word; he spent ages opening Crosby up. Claude had lost track of time well before Coots was nudging Claude’s legs wide so he could get behind Crosby on the bench.Crosby’s kiss stilled, his breath going quick and maybe a little panicked, and Claude stroked his cheek, pressed his mouth against Crosby’s temple and jaw, whispering nonsensical reassurance into his ear. Coots was definitely pushing into him now, his dick sliding almost painfully against Claude’s, and if that wasn’t enough proof, he’d have been able to tell by the way Crosby grimaced. Claude reached for his dick again, keeping him half-hard.“Okay?” Claude gasped. “Yeah?”Crosby’s eyes slammed closed, but he nodded. “I just…need a second.”“Coots,” Claude said, and Coots stopped moving.“He’s so fucking tight,” Coots gasped. “Jesus, he’s like a fucking furnace inside.”Eventually Crosby nodded again, and his body rocked forward as Coots resumed pushing inside him. It was downright strange to feel Coots’s dick up against Claude’s own, to feel the absurd tightness and the wetness and friction even though neither he nor Crosby were moving. Claude got harder at the idea of it, of two dicks in Crosby’s ass at once, but it was also the way Crosby’s thighs were split wide over him, the way Crosby’s strong body was shaking, the way he couldn't hide his defenselessness. Claude shifted, tipping his hips and Crosby moaned, low and pained and overwhelmed, and there were—Jesus, there were tears wending their way over his cheeks now.“Crosby,” Claude said helplessly, “Are we hurting you?”“It’s just…a lot. It’s so much, Jesus.” He was panting, his fingers clutching Claude’s shoulders so firmly that it ached. Claude couldn’t have told him to let go to save his own life.“Say it,” Claude murmured. “Say ‘Ma—‘’"Don’t stop,” Crosby ordered, in a very weak approximation of his captain’s voice. And even that threat of authority vanished as Coots slid in again, pushing Claude’s dick directly into Crosby’s prostate, as Crosby’s eyes all but rolled up in his head. His voice had dropped an octave when he groaned, “Oh, God, that's good.”That got Claude halfway there all by its lonesome, and he couldn’t breathe past the heat in his gut, couldn’t think, but fortunately, Coots had it a little more together. He began to pick up a rhythm, long, slow thrusts that had them shifting in Crosby’s ass in very careful ways, and all that caution was exactly right, because Crosby was fucking falling apart between them. He was sweaty and red and the tears kept coming, soundless and slow. His arms wound around Claude’s neck, and Claude had to dip his head and kiss him, he had to.Crosby kissed back. He was making these continuous hurt little sounds, backing onto their cocks, his whole body quivering almost violently, and Claude was close, he was so close. But he wanted Crosby with him on this first. "Can I make you come, Crosby? Tell me I can make you come."“Okay. Okay, yeah,” Crosby whispered against Claude’s mouth, pleading over and over: “fuck me harder, please, fuck me, fuck me.”They were already fucking him pretty damn hard, but Claude rolled his hips with more force anyway, using the tiny bit of room and leverage he had in this position. His hand was still wrapped around Crosby’s dick, and he could feel the pre-come slick and sticky between their bodies. He tugged a few times and the effect on Crosby was electrifying: he dropped his head back, cried out, and fucked himself down onto their dicks like he could never get enough.Coots came seconds later, pumping inside of Crosby with a shout, and Claude didn’t make it past the sensation of Coots’s come flooding over his dick, wet and warm, before he followed. He curled his hips upward as the pleasure rushed through him, and yanked Crosby down onto him at the same time. Too roughly, he thought as the orgasm raced up his spine, but Crosby was coming too, coming hard, his mouth open, his grip on Claude’s shoulders downright painful.Crosby collapsed forward, his face going into the hollow of Claude’s throat, his chest heaving, his breath catching over and over, his arms and legs limp. Coots eased back gingerly before sprawling onto the floor to recover. Claude was propped up nicely enough; he was comfortable enough to stay there for hours with Crosby in his lap.He could feel wetness against his throat—sweat, maybe, although judging from Crosby’s tight, quick breaths, more tears weren’t beyond the realm of possibility. He hoped it was the former—hoped it with all his strength, actually, because the idea of Crosby crying crept under Claude’s skin, made him weak in a way he wasn’t sure he liked. He felt wobbly inside, shucked empty, and he wasn’t sure he could conceal it.He murmured, “Hey,” and Crosby lifted his head like it weight a million pounds. Claude wasn’t sure what to expect—anger or humiliation or perhaps awkwardness, but instead he got his first glimpse of what a thoroughly fucked-out Sidney Crosby looked like.He was beautiful. Weary, yes, and open, completely and warmly open, his mouth curving in a dozy smile. It didn’t matter, suddenly, that Claude didn’t have the energy to hide how exposed he was, because Crosby was in the same boat, apparently. There were no walls, and Claude thought, terrifyingly, that he could look at Crosby for hours when he was soft like this.He wasn’t sure which of them moved, but they were kissing again, slick and slow and sweet. It felt like it took days, that kiss, and even after Claude’s dick had softened and slipped from Crosby’s body, they kissed and kissed and kissed.It took Coots clearing his throat, audibly amused, for Claude to draw back, reluctant and a little sour at the need. He noticed that Coots was dressed, his hair wet from a shower, and then immediately dismissed that info as unimportant, especially since Crosby was inches away and staring at him, dazed and clinging.“This explains a lot,” Coots said, grinning and gesturing with a finger in the air between Clause and Crosby. Claude would’ve flipped him off if it hadn’t meant having to let go of Crosby to do it. Instead he just tunneled his fingers through Crosby’s hair and pulled him back in.Coots was long gone by the time they surfaced again, and the only reason Claude managed it this time was that Crosby’s breath had begun hitching again. His cheeks were wet again too. Tears of exhaustion, Claude decided, taking in the heavy limbs and developing frown. Exhaustion and emotional upheaval.“Let’s get you clean,” Claude said.Getting Crosby to his feet was an exercise in teamwork, and Claude ended up propping Crosby against the wall while he waited for the feeling to return to his legs. Finally he steered Crosby into the shower and turned the water on to steaming hot. Crosby stood under the stream, face tipped upwards into the spray, but didn’t otherwise move, and Claude figured that meant he was taking over hygiene duty.Disturbingly, he didn’t mind at all.He tried to sort through the feeling as he shampooed Crosby’s hair and scrubbed dried come and sweat from his skin. He wasn’t sure how to define it, but he kept coming back to Coots’s comment: This explains a lot.Did it? Had this electricity and sweetness always existed between them? Had the potential always been there, but been made inaccessible by rivalry and competitiveness and bad sportsmanship?He wasn’t sure. Looking at Crosby leaning against the shower wall, eyes closed, his body curved with fatigue, Claude really wasn’t sure. He knew he liked this, that he felt a sense of ownership and protectiveness that he’d only ever known with some of his most vulnerable rookies and Danny’s boys. There was a wariness here, though, that didn’t exist with those other relationships, an awareness that the battle for this intimacy had been hard-fought and could restart at any time, that these moments were all the more precious for being temporary and nearly impossible to earn. Crosby would regain his equilibrium sooner or later and go back to his usual infuriating blend of competitiveness and irrationalities. Claude wanted to believe that this feeling would go away when Crosby reverted, but he suspected it wasn’t true. He was afraid that this need would resurface over and over, interspersed with violent episodes unfurling between them, episodes that ended with this fragile, lovely peace for a time, until the whole thing started over again.Not unlike the quest for the Cup, he thought, and snorted.He pushed Crosby’s hair back from his face, his fingers making the gesture tender when he hadn’t meant for it to be. Crosby’s eyes opened, and it took a second for him to focus on Claude.“I need to sleep,” he said, and Claude nodded.“Let’s get dressed. I’ll give you a ride home.”“Do you have a car?”The team bus had probably made several trips to the hotel by now, but he doubted it would come back just for him; he could picture Coots saying something like, yeah, they’re getting married, we’re never going to see G again, we should just go. The little fuck.“No,” Claude said. “I can drive yours, though. I’ll call a cab from your place.”Crosby turned off the water with a quick flick of his wrist. His jaw set, and when he spoke, it was directed to the tile beneath their feet, and so soft that Claude had trouble hearing him. “Or maybe you don't. Maybe you don't call a cab.”Claude’s hand tightened involuntarily on Crosby’s cheek as he pictured it: following Crosby into his dark house, walking through a shadowed living room and up unfamiliar stairs. What would his bedroom be like? Was Crosby like half of Claude's rookies, sleeping on futons and leaving piles of dirty clothes everywhere? No, Claude doubted it. Crosby was too particular and he was hardly a teenager; his bedroom was probably really nice. His mattress would be a mile wide. Claude imagined sliding under expensive sheets, imagined Crosby lying in awkward silence at his side, both of them uncomfortable and wishing Claude had gone back to the hotel. Then he imagined Crosby huffing impatiently and yanking Claude closer, tugging their bodies together so that they knocked knees and elbows, so close that Claude could smell the scent of the Penguins' locker room shampoo on Crosby's curls. He imagined waking up with Crosby's too-warm body sprawled vulnerable and sleep-heavy beside him. That...that would be okay. Quietly, he said, “This is going to be rocky.”Crosby lifted his head. “Yeah. Yeah, I know. But I like fighting. I mean, I like fighting for something. Don’t you?”Claude considered, but with Crosby’s gaze so intent on his, it was a little hard to breathe, let alone argue.Sounding frustrated, Crosby said, “That’s the whole reason you want me, isn’t it?”Claude thought of the angry, rebellious fuck you that’d ridden every line of Crosby’s body when he’d first shown up, and yes, he did want that. Crosby’s antagonism woke him up like nothing else except being on the ice. He also thought of the moment at the bench just minutes ago when Crosby had been lovely and broken down and clinging to him. Somehow there was room for both of these extremes in Crosby's strong body. Who knew what else Claude might discover, given enough time? “Not the whole reason.”Crosby—Sid, it was probably Sid now—nodded. One hand lifted to tentatively rest on Claude's hip. “It’s not my whole reason, either.”“Okay. Good." So they were doing this. Whatever this was, they were doing it. Claude pressed a kiss to Sid’s damp temple and hoped they figured out what the hell they were doing sooner or later. "It'll be good."
|
10695474
|
Lost and Found
|
{
"Archive Warning": "No Archive Warnings Apply",
"Category": "Multi",
"Characters": "Duke Crocker, Audrey Parker (Haven), Nathan Wuornos",
"Fandom": "Haven (TV)",
"Language": "English",
"Rating": "General Audiences",
"author": "by YumeArashi",
"chapters": "1/1",
"completed": "",
"published": "2017-04-22T00:00:00",
"words": "250",
"Additional Tags": "Fluff",
"Relationship": "Duke Crocker/Audrey Parker/Nathan Wuornos",
"Character": null,
"Relationships": null,
"Series": null,
"Collections": null,
"Fandoms": null,
"Archive Warnings": null,
"Categories": null,
"Bookmarks": null,
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"Comments": null,
"Completed": null,
"Hits": null,
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"Published": null,
"Words": null,
"Updated": null
}
|
They say you don’t know what you’re missing until it’s gone, but in the case of Nathan and his sense of touch, it’s when it came back that he truly realized the depth of his loss.
He had told himself, over and over through the last few years, that his sense of touch was no great loss. People learned to live without their senses every day. What loss was there in no longer feeling a pen in his hand or the paper beneath it, the wheel of the Bronco or its door handle, the fabric of clothes and linens, the silverware and remote controls and light switches and doorknobs of everyday domestic life? They were only things. It was worth it to no longer suffer pain or cold or other discomforts.
But now, curled up on the couch with Duke and Audrey draped companionably against him, he saw that he’d been missing so much more. The reassuring rise and fall of their breath beneath his hands, the solid, comforting warmth of them against his side, reminding him that they were here, they were safe, they were alive and well and with him. The silk of hair, the satin of skin, the contours of their beloved faces. The feel of them there by his side even when his eyes were closed. The closeness that eased the lifelong ache in his heart.
The reason he had never truly realized what he’d lost was quite simply that he’d never had it.
Until now.
|
10642236
|
afternoon
|
{
"Archive Warning": "No Archive Warnings Apply",
"Category": "M/M",
"Characters": "Reigen Arataka, Serizawa Katsuya",
"Fandom": "モブサイコ100 | Mob Psycho 100",
"Language": "English",
"Rating": "General Audiences",
"author": "by nightlurkings",
"chapters": "1/1",
"completed": "",
"published": "2017-04-16T00:00:00",
"words": "488",
"Additional Tags": "Drabble, Fluff, there is no dialogue in this fic, Wow, Pre-Relationship",
"Relationship": "Reigen Arataka/Serizawa Katsuya",
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}
|
For someone who had spent fifteen years of his life locked in his room, Serizawa sometimes get too confused about feelings.It’s…not something that he could get familiar with, apparently. It’s not that he doesn’t know what feelings are, he’s just—unsurprisingly bad at it. He knows how it feels to be nervous, to be scared, to be angry.But other than some of the feelings he had mentioned before? He wasn’t sure.Most importantly, he doesn’t know what to call the feeling he got whenever he saw Reigen. He doesn’t know why his hands got even more clammy than usual whenever he got too close to his employer; why his heart beats way faster than normal when Reigen touched him; why his cheeks feel warm when Reigen smiled at him; why he keeps thinking about that smile whenever he’s alone.He doesn’t know what to name the feeling with.Serizawa thinks that he should probably ask about that feeling to someone—but he couldn’t really ask to Reigen. Serizawa couldn’t even say things without stuttering if he talks to him, anyway. And he wasn’t sure if he could ask Shigeo or not—the boy seemed as oblivious to feelings as he was.So he doesn’t ask. He keeps that feelings in bay.But sometimes his heart betrays him. Sometimes his heart feels like it skips a beat whenever Reigen laughed at his half-assed jokes, whenever Reigen offered him dinner, whenever Reigen smiles—And his brain stopped working when he caught Reigen sleeping on the couch.Serizawa came to work late that day, since he had to do a group task with his classmates in the morning—and Reigen surprisingly doesn’t mind when Serizawa told him that—and they had only finished it after lunch. Serizawa was half-running to the office before he opened the office door and find Reigen sleeping on the couch.It doesn’t look like Reigen slept on purpose, though, since he’s still wearing his shoes and suit. His arms were crossed in front of his chest, and Serizawa could hear the soft, steady inhales and exhales. His chest and cheeks feel warm, and Serizawa couldn’t fight back a smile.(He does that a lot lately when he’s thinking about Reigen, too. It’s a weirdly pleasant feeling.)Reigen looks…peaceful in his sleep. It’s surprising how different he looked like when he’s sleeping like this—so unguarded—and there’s a flash of feelings that made Serizawa’s chest warm again.Huh. He wonders what it was, really.Serizawa knew that he should probably wake Reigen from his sleep, but he looks too peaceful and Serizawa doesn’t have the heart to. So he sat down on the floor beside the couch—despite the empty chair just across it—and with his powers, turned the sign on the front door from ‘Open’ to ‘Closed’.Maybe if he stays like this, he can understand what that feeling was.
|
10621911
|
Pink Party Favours
|
{
"Archive Warning": "Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings",
"Category": "Multi",
"Characters": "Tony Stark, Clint Barton, Natasha Romanov (Marvel), Steve Rogers, Bruce Banner, Jarvis (Iron Man movies), Thor (Marvel)",
"Fandom": "Marvel Cinematic Universe",
"Language": "English",
"Rating": "Teen And Up Audiences",
"author": "by millygal",
"chapters": "1/1",
"completed": "",
"published": "2017-04-14T00:00:00",
"words": "589",
"Additional Tags": "Crack",
"Relationship": null,
"Character": null,
"Relationships": null,
"Series": null,
"Collections": null,
"Fandoms": null,
"Archive Warnings": null,
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"Published": null,
"Words": null,
"Updated": null
}
|
Tony shakes his head inside his helmet and wishes for the first time in about four decades, that the ground would open up and swallow him, "This is neither big nor clever, guys!"It's hard to tell inside the giant metal suit but he's fairly sure he can hear children across the street catcalling, and there's a contractor hanging out of his van wolf whistling and pursing his lips in a less than polite manner, "Really, you think this bothers me? Well think again!"It's been well documented on every social media platform that Tony Stark is both a huge exhibitionist and proud of it! Yet, today, with the entire of the Upper East Side starting to gather on the street in front of him, he's beginning to understand how Happy and Pepper must have felt all those times they had to dodge another inappropriate bullet on his behalf, "Okay look, it's been ten minutes, surely I can leave now, right?!"It's fine, it's totally fine, he can handle it, he lost the bet after all.Maybe if he released a statement saying that Clint stole the suit and spray painted it this colour, he could avoid all questions, perhaps even get away with saying he wasn't the one inside...Or perhaps not!Tony turns slightly to his left and spots Clint, Nat and Steve all openly gawking, with camera phones in hand, not acting remotely superhero-ish, "Fuck OFF!"Clint steps forward, phone still pointed in Tony's direction, and proceeds to go down on one knee to get a better recording angle, evil smirk plastered all over his face, "Come on now Tinfoil Boy...you promised. First the twirl, then the show and tell!"The heavy hearted resigned sigh reverberates throughout Tony's helmet, bouncing back against his flaming cheeks, "FINE! Just, make it quick. Douche-Nozzles, you're all Douche-Nozzles!"Nat and Steve settle cross legged on the sidewalk in front of him just as Thor touches down with an annoyingly graceful thud, "Did I miss the festivities, has the Man of Iron done his dance of the defeated?!"Tony chooses to ignore the drape wearing male model in favour of pointing his metal covered fingers in a ballet style motion before he realises he can feel his entire body vibrating. Looking up he sees the HULK come sliding down the side of the building opposite and decides he's officially never making a bet with any of these bastards ever again, "Really? REALLY! Bruce let YOU out to play for this?!"Nat smiles sweetly before scooting over and giving the green meanie space to squat down next to her, "I promised to record it for him.""Bite me!"After finally realising that the ground won't in fact swallow him whole, Tony decides it's better over and done with.Pointing his toes, rotating his wrists, he does a passable impression of a ballet dancer, spinning not once, not twice, but three times before coming to a stop, shoving a gauntlet inside his Victoria Secrets bag and pulling out a very fluffy, very pink, peep hole men's thong.Flash bulbs go off left right and centre and before he's realised what's happening there's a news crew piling in around him and even Jarvis has abandoned him to a stilted giggle, as if he's chewing on the inside of his non existent cheek, "Traitor!""I...I'm sorry sir, but you...you did say, if Thor could out drink you, you'd wear a pink suit and flash a peep hole thong at the general public!"
|
10653414
|
ad interim
|
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"Archive Warning": "No Archive Warnings Apply",
"Category": "M/M",
"Characters": "Lee Minhyuk (Monsta X), Chae Hyungwon (Monsta X), Shin Hoseok | Wonho, Lim Changkyun | I.M",
"Fandom": "Monsta X (Band)",
"Language": "Bahasa Indonesia",
"Rating": "General Audiences",
"author": "by ketupat ketan (gatitoenak)",
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"completed": "",
"published": "2017-04-17T00:00:00",
"words": "703",
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|
ad in·te·rim lt a untuk sementara waktu Ketika tangan itu menyentuh pipinya dengan keras dan kasar, kau melihatnya menunundukkan wajahnya, menjilat bibirnya sekilas, sorot matanya merana, dan kembali menegakkan wajahnya kembali—namun dengan rasa takut-takut yang meletup—lalu, kembali menunduk, menghindari tatapan kau dan mereka; kalian, yang sedari tadi hanya menjadi spektator saja. Tidak tahu kalau ini hanya perasaanmu saja atau apa, tapi, kau hanya bisa melihatnya, dan si pemilik tangan (tangannya, yang mendarat di pipi dia dengan suara yang cukup keras), membalikkan tubuhnya, berjalan dan kau tidak melihat punggungnya lagi.(Dan, kau; kejadian itu selalu memenuhi isi memorimu hingga kini).
. . .
Hari ini kau melihatnya.Pintu itu terbuka, dan dia ada di sana; duduk di antara buku-buku (di antaranya sudah sangat tua, mungkin) yang tergeletak tak berdaya, membelakangi jendela yang menjadi pintu masuk cahaya, dan duduk dengan kepala menunduk, dengan kain yang menutupi hampir seluruh wajahnya—tapi ada lubang untuk kedua mata dan mulutnya.Kau duduk di depannya, dan ketika kau mencoba untuk membuka apa yang membungkus kepalanya (bahannya seperti bahan yang dipakai untuk mafela-mafela), namun, tangan kurusnnya bergerak; ia menolak, ia menolak. Kau tidak melakukan dengan cara kasar apa pun karena pada akhirnya dia menyerah; kepalanya sedikit digerakkan ke bawah dan ke samping secara bersamaan (mencoba untuk tidak menatapmu), dan tangannya berhenti melakukan gerakan perlawanan.Dan tanganmu perlahan membukanya—dan waktu terasa begitu lambat saat kau melakukannya—kain itu terlepas, dan kau bisa melihatnya dia menatap ke bawah, tidak berani melihatmu saat itu juga.Dia menolehkan kepalanya ke samping (terang sekali dia tidak mau menatap dirimu), dan kau bisa melihatnya; bibirnya yang tebal terluka di sudutnya (warnanya menjadi ungu, dan kau yakin jika sudut itu mengeluarkan darah sebelumnya), sorot matanya yang menjadi lebih sayu daripada yang biasanya, salah satu pipinya yang berwarna keunguan, dan ujung salah satu matanya yang hampir sewarna dengan pipinya sendiri.Kau terdiam. Lalu, dengan gerakan lambat, dia sedikit menggerakkan kepalanya, dan dengan gerakan putus-putus, dia menatapmu (dan entah kenapa, matanya; matanya memancarkan rasa putus asa entah bersalah yang dengan luar biasa membuatmu sangat muak—)Kau tidak kuat.Dan kau, dengan terburu-buru, beranjak, dan pergi meninggalkan tempat itu, dengan dia yang masih duduk di sana, di antara buku-buku yang tergeletak tidak berdaya, sendirian.
. . .
Hoodie-mu menutup bagian atas kepalamu, langkah kedua kaki kurus pucat membawamu maju; terburu-buru. Salah satu tanganmu membawa cairan yang mudah terbakar, dan di belakangmu ada dua orang yang membantumu nantinya. Kau berjalan, alismu memang tidak saling bertaut, atau kedua belah bibir itu tidak terbuka untuk mengeluarkan umpatan-umpatan yang paling kasar sedunia; tapi melihat sorot kedua mata gelapmu semua orang tahu kalau kau sedang murka.Dan ketika kau menemukan dirimu di sebuah bangunan, kau tahu kalau kau tidak bisa berpikir jernih lagi.
. . .
Dirgantara pada malam itu terlihat sangat berbeda.Spiral-spiral asap menyebar ke mana-mana, dan jalan sekitar daerah itu terlihat sangat terang dengan warna oranye-kemerahan, hawa panas yang menyengat, orang yang keluar dengan terbatuk-batuk; bangunan itu terbakar; api ada di mana-mana, dan mereka menyebar dan membesar dengan sangat cepat—bangunannya belum roboh, namun kau bisa yakin dalam waktu beberapa jam lagi bangunan itu akan habis.Kau, dengan tangan yang dimasukkan dalam saku, dengan dua orang yang ada di salah satu sisimu; melihat itu semua, diam seribu bahasa.
. . .
Kau menemukan dirimu berdiri bersandar di sebuah dinding berkeramik, di sebuah ruangan yang banyak oleh tumbuhan-tumbuhan, menunduk, menatap figur yang terendam di bak mandi yang ada di ruangan itu.Dia ada di sana, dengan sebagian besar tubuhnya yang terendam, kakinya yang panjang tidak berada di dalam bak, dan tubuhnya (tubuhnya, yang kurus pucat terlihat kosong—sekosong tatapanmu) yang kaku di dalam air yang membungkusnya.Lalu, kau menemukan dirimu duduk di salah satu sisi dekat bak mandi putih itu, menunduk, dengan tatapan hampa (karena jantungmu rasanya berhenti bekerja), menatap tubuhnya, lalu wajahnya; wajahnya, masih sama seperti kemarin; jejak keunguan itu belum hilang, matanya yang sayu terpejam, dan kau membuka botol yang berisi cairan biru itu dan menuangnya ke dalam (kau menelan ludah, gugup, jantungmu dengan keras berdegup, lalu akal sehat itu hilang ketika kau masuk ke dalamnya; ikut terendam, dan tanganmu merengkuh tubuh kurus miliknya dan menggenggam tangannya—)Kau tidak tahu apa yang terjadi setelahnya.(Dan sayangnya, tangan itu membalas; ada tanda kehidupan di sana).
| e n d |
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10606572
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would it kill you to
|
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"Archive Warning": "No Archive Warnings Apply",
"Category": "F/F",
"Characters": null,
"Fandom": "DC's Legends of Tomorrow (TV)",
"Language": "English",
"Rating": "Mature",
"author": "by pirateygoodness",
"chapters": "1/1",
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|
Mick takes the spear. Or, rather: he takes the spear and gives it away to the Legion of Doom. He does it on a battlefield - fittingly - and Amaya has to watch as Sara lets him. And then the bullets start flying, and everything is frantic. It’s a mad dash back to the Waverider - yet another - and Amaya’s never felt so angry, so hopeless, in her life. (This is a lie: she has felt exactly this angry and hopeless once before, learning about her own death and watching footage of her village in flames.) She feels it down to her bones, warm rage and the absence of the spear, the sudden lack of her mother’s voice, the energy of its power. Sara wasn’t wrong: it had been calling, tempting her. Being away from the spear feels like a palpable loss, and she doesn’t know if it’s missing what she wanted to do or what the spear wanted her to do, but either way: it didn’t happen. Reality’s exactly the same as it always has been. For the time being. Sara is silent as they run back across the battlefield of the Somme. Dimly, Amaya’s aware of her calling Jax, arranging an extraction. There’s blood on the grass, staining Amaya’s boots a deep, muddy red. Everything smells like dirt and fresh grass and gunpowder. Her ears are ringing with the sound of gunfire, and the hum of her own anger. They make it back to the Waverider, at least, before either of them start to fray around the edges. They stand on the bridge, and Amaya lashes out and it helps but not enough, doesn’t quite take the edge off of how she’s feeling, the simmering fury under her skin. Nate doesn’t think there’s hope for the world anymore; Amaya suddenly understands why Mick wanted to watch it burn. They make a plan. Rather, Rip and Sara make a plan, because they’re always the ones doing that, leading the rest of them on half-baked missions that never seem to go as they should. Nate has to do more research on how to use the spear, and the rest of the team gets thirty-five glorious minutes to regroup, before they jump back to the Vanishing Point. Amaya follows Sara down the hall, toward the corridor with their shared bunks. She’s not trying to bother her - isn’t sure she even wants to be near Sara right now - but it’s an unhappy coincidence all the same. Sara’s walking quickly, her shoulders set. She’s got her back to Amaya, but Amaya doesn’t need to see her face to know how she’s feeling. Amaya’s seen her angry often enough now to picture the dark look on her face, recognizes the frustration in her stride. As they both round the corner, Sara’s boot catches on the edge of a bulkhead and she trips, swears under her breath. She’s upset. Amaya understands that - should be understanding of that. “Take it easy, Captain,” she says. It comes out mocking, sharp, the tone of voice something Amaya barely recognizes. Sara inhales sharply. Her shoulders are up around her ears and Amaya can see her force them down, force her voice into calm. “That’s enough, Amaya.” “No, it’s not,” Amaya says. “We lost the spear.”Sara sighs. “We’ll get it back.” “You don’t know that. But you know what I do know? We failed today,” she snaps. It’s mean - too mean - and she can see the way that it gets under Sara’s skin. Sara looks like she’s been slapped, and maybe - probably - Amaya should feel bad about that. Sara’s hands fist at her sides, and she flexes them open with effort, as she stalks into Amaya’s personal space. They’re still wearing their nurse’s uniforms, and Amaya can feel their skirts rustle together as Sara leans in, coming so close that her foot is between Amaya’s. Amaya suddenly feels a rush of emotion, anger mingling with something more as she takes in the nearness of Sara, the way she’s leaning in. “Do you have something you’d like to say to me?” she hisses. “I’m pretty sure I’ve already said it, Captain,” Amaya spits back. Sara’s so near that they’re practically touching, her mouth and nose millimetres from Amaya’s own. They’re not kissing, either of them, but they’re near enough that they might as well be. Sara’s arms come up, and she slaps the wall behind Amaya’s head, pushing herself away. The effect is immediate, the moment between them shattering. “You need to take a minute, Amaya,” she says. She’s not looking at Amaya, she’s looking at a space behind her head, focusing intently at a space on the wall that’s not goading her into anything. “Go cool off. We time jump in a half hour.” Amaya stalks away. Her hands are shaking by the time she gets to her bunk, unsteady with a flurry of emotion that she can’t fully name. She kicks off her boots, tears off her kerchief, manages her tights before she has to give herself a minute. She doesn’t know that she’s really mad at Sara, not really. But she feels awful about Mick, like a wound she can’t stop worrying at, and everyone in her life keeps dying and it feels like the only constant is Sara. Sara, presiding over it all, telling them over and over that she’s got this. (In Amaya’s darker moments, she can’t stop thinking about the fact that every time Sara says that, Amaya ends up getting hurt.)She’s barefoot as she stalks down the hall to Sara’s bunk, still fuming. She doesn’t know what she plans to say, as she palms the door open and steps inside. Sara’s in a similar state of half-undress; her petticoat and boots and tights on the floor, ready to be sent to recycling for the Fabricator. She’s got her skirt hiked up, unstrapping a roll of knives from her thigh, and all Amaya can think about, suddenly, is her legs. How strong they are, how she knows things about what Sara keeps between them and how suddenly, she wants that. “If you’re here to yell at me again, just - save it,” Sara says. Amaya stops cold. She hears the hiss of the door behind her, clicking shut. She sees the way Sara’s mouth is drawn, the slouch of her shoulders, and feels a twist of guilt in the pit of her stomach. She looks so tired, and Amaya can’t help but feel like part of that is her fault. The more she thinks about it, the less sure she feels about Sara deserving her anger. “Mick is gone,” is what she says. She’s not shouting, not hurling accusations. The sight of Sara seems to have taken the fight out of her, at least for a time. “I know,” Sara replies. She sounds defeated. That’s not what Amaya needs. Amaya doesn’t want to talk, doesn’t want to cry. Amaya wants to act, wants to feel her blood rushing in her ears and actually reach a satisfying conclusion, whether that’s fighting, or the other thing.“He’s gone and you were supposed to fix it,” Amaya says. There’s a little more fire to her voice, a sharp edge that seems to hit Sara like a blow. Sara stands straight, lets her weapons fall to the floor in a pile, next to her petticoat. When she crosses the room toward Amaya, she’s unarmed, but that doesn’t make her any less dangerous. “I was supposed to fix it? All on my own, huh?” Sara keeps coming toward her, and Amaya finds herself stepping backward, trying to maintain distance between them. Her back hits the wall within a few steps. Sara keeps moving, closing the space so that they’re back as they were in the cargo bay, eye to eye and nearly touching. “What about you?” Sara hisses. “What about my best warrior, who let herself get so seduced by a mystical object that she wanted to rewrite reality -“ “Shut up,” Amaya hisses back. She shoves at Sara’s shoulders. Sara’s quicker, returns the blow and pins Amaya against the wall, one forearm pressing down across her sternum and her hips tight against Amaya’s own. “I’m not the one who started this,” Sara says. Her voice is low, just on the line between dangerous and something else, something that Amaya’s feeling between her own legs.Amaya flexes, shifting her hips underneath Sara’s. There’s just enough give in Sara’s hold that she can move her thigh, position it so that when she tenses the muscle, it presses at Sara’s apex. Sara does her best not to react, but she can’t suppress a small sigh, the slight shift of her hips to rock down against her. “What are you going to do about it, Captain?” Amaya asks. It’s a dare, one that Sara takes her up on. They don’t kiss. Not on the lips, and the collar of Amaya’s dress is too high for Sara to kiss her neck, so she doesn’t bother. She arches herself into Amaya’s body, indirect contact that makes Amaya suddenly, intimately aware of herself. She’s aware of the thrum of her heartbeat, the way that all of her anger and hurt is sublimating into this, into heat and wetness between her thighs. Sara shifts position, arranges herself so that Amaya’s leg is more fully between her own. When she leans forward, rising up onto her toes, her thigh presses against Amaya’s cunt. It’s four layers of skirts and then underwear and then Sara’s thigh, pressing up, but Amaya ruts against it instinctively, surprising herself with her own eagerness. Sara laughs, and it almost makes Amaya angry all over again. But then she hears the rustle of fabric and Sara’s tugging at her skirts, hiking them up until they’re bunched around Amaya’s waist.Suddenly, the layers between Sara’s thigh and Amaya’s cunt are much fewer, and when Sara flexes her leg upward, Amaya cries out. She’s already slick for this, she’s sure, and her hips seem to jut out of their own accord, betraying her eagerness. Sara’s breath is ragged as she presses her head to Amaya’s shoulder. That arm across Amaya’s chest slowly relaxes, and Sara uses it to cup Amaya through her underwear. Amaya groans, bucks down into Sara’s hand, her desire suddenly overwhelming. Her cunt feels like it’s throbbing, and with every movement she can feel the way she’s slipping against herself, well-lubricated to an almost embarrassing extent. Her underwear are a barrier that feels like a hardship, the only thing separating Sara’s fingers from the places where Amaya needs to be touched. Sara grinds the heel of her hand upward, pressing the fabric of her panties into her clit, and Amaya whines. Sara’s breath catches in the back of her throat, and Amaya feels her start to fumble with the waistband of her panties before giving up, shoving the gusset to the side. Her fingertips slide home against Amaya’s clit and it’s wonderful. Sara works her up far too quickly, and within moments Amaya feels undone, half-desperate. She wants to bite down, wants to tear at Sara’s skin, but Sara’s dress is in the way and far too great an obstacle. She settles for clutching at Sara’s shoulders, nails digging in. Sara’s fingertips are firm against her clit, rubbing circles that Amaya feels in her whole center, everything warm and shivery as her pleasure builds. Amaya allows it, clutches Sara’s close and rides her hand through every touch. She’s still got her knee between Sara’s legs, and every time she flexes a certain way, she feels Sara rut against her, hears Sara’s groan of pleasure. It sends an answering jolt straight to her own cunt. This isn’t anything - isn’t a relationship - but Amaya isn’t immune to appreciating Sara’s pleasure. There’s something delicious about it, too, knowing that the act of pleasuring Amaya gets Sara feeling like that. Knowing that she’s not the only one who needs this, today. Sara’s pace quickens, and suddenly Amaya’s not on the edge of anything; she’s finishing with a groan, slippery and wet against Sara’s hand. Sara doesn’t linger. She steps away, businesslike, but Amaya doesn’t miss the way Sara wipes the slick onto her skirts, the way her hands are shaking just a little bit. Sara looks breathless, like this is getting her as much as it got Amaya. Now that the edge of Amaya’s anger has dulled, she’s feeling generous. She shoves at Sara’s shoulders. Her touch is difficult to read, halfway between playfulness and aggression, but Sara catches on immediately. She allows herself to be backed towards the bed, allows Amaya to gently coax her onto it. Sara’s skirts are half-hiked by the time she lands, and it’s only a few moments of fumbling more before her underwear are on the floor, and Amaya’s in between her knees. Sara’s hand slides between her legs, hiking her skirts fully, exposing her cunt. Before Amaya can fully react to the sight of her, Sara’s fingertips are sliding down, disappearing into her cunt and then circling her clit. Her touch is efficient, almost businesslike, but Amaya can’t help but find it beautiful, all the same. She reaches out, cups Sara’s cunt, and she can feel the warmth radiating from it. She’s never felt power like she did when she was holding the spear, that heady rush of confidence and clear, sharp certainty that she could use it properly. But holding Sara’s cunt in her hand is a close second, when she parts Sara’s lips and slides two fingers inside and can see-feel-hear the way she shudders into it. She can’t quite believe the fact that Sara allows Amaya to touch her, thighs parting with something like trust.Sara is slick and velvet-warm inside, and Amaya has to bite her own lip to keep from groaning at the feel of her. She’s eager for this, fingertips working at her clit while Amaya fucks her. There’s an odd intimacy to it, the way that Amaya can feel the rhythm of Sara touching herself, can feel Sara’s fingertips bumping against her knuckles as they work together. The feeling veers close to real tenderness, something they don’t have with each other. Amaya focuses on rhythm, focuses on bracing her hand with her knee so that Sara’s hips can buck against her. She learns that Sara likes force, likes when Amaya’s fingers sink deep into her with purpose, and once she learns that it’s not long before Sara’s shuddering and clenching around her hand, her orgasm overtaking her. Sara slouches back, lets her head fall against the pillow as she works the last shudders out. Amaya lingers until she feels Sara’s inner walls relax around her fingers, until Sara’s breathing starts to slow. Sara’s the one who rolls away first. She’s still flushed, still a bit breathless, as she slides off of the bed and starts to undress. “I’ve got to - I should get to the bridge, see if Nate’s found anything,” she says. “Right,” Amaya says. She’s still a bit dazed, mellowed from her own pleasure and the experience of touching Sara. “You coming?” Sara asks. Her voice is all business, as she crosses the room in her underwear and pulls out jeans, a soft sweater. Amaya nods. She’s still wearing her apron, her skirts, and suddenly that feels ridiculous. “Yeah, I’ll be there.”As Sara passes, dressed and ready to head back to the bustle of the ship, Amaya grabs her wrist. She doesn’t - it’s not that she cares. It’s just that Sara looks so tired, and Amaya’s starting to realize that she might not be the only one who’s not okay, after all of this. “Hey,” she says. “You - I think you can make this right. For what it’s worth.” She’s not sure if she really thinks that’s true. Things seem different, now that the spear isn’t so nearby, but her feelings are still a tangle under her ribs, confusing and constantly in flux. It’s hard to tell what she believes, right now. Sara smiles. “You don’t mean that,” she says. “But thanks.”
|
10646613
|
Darkness falls
|
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"Characters": "Skye | Daisy Johnson, Jemma Simmons, Leo Fitz",
"Fandom": "Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D. (TV)",
"Language": "English",
"Rating": "General Audiences",
"author": "by xfmoon",
"chapters": "1/1",
"completed": "",
"published": "2017-04-16T00:00:00",
"words": "763",
"Additional Tags": "Hydra, The Framework, Virtual Reality, Reality",
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}
|
He woke up to a reality he didn't want to be in.There were four of them in the submarine, when the rescue team came. And then there were Radcliffe. His lifeless body was still strapped into the wires that had connected him to the Framework. Blood that had long since dried up was pooled beneath his feet, yet the metallic smell still lingered in the air. It made Fitz sick because he knew what was waiting for him when he got back to the zephyr.How would he ever be able to live with himself after this? After what he'd done. This was all his fault. And there was nothing he could do now. He wanted to delay it. Reality. How could he face them? If the virtual world hadn't been so upside down he might have considered going back in there, crawling into the ones and zeroes and starting anew, leaving his material body behind like Radcliffe, but in a less violent way of course.But obviously that wasn't an option. He had to show some dignity and some spine. Or had he misplaced and forgotten his courage somewhere in there?On wobbly legs he got on board, as the last of the four of them, none of which were really too steady on their feet just yet, that's what happens when you only use your mind to walk a thousand miles. There were tears and hugs. No blame and no one were yelling.Daisy let him to her. They had removed the wires so she looked like she was just sleeping. He knew better. It might not have been a bloodbath like Radcliffe's – not here at least, here she just looked like she had passed away in her sleep. Though he'd heard whispers of how awful it had been to watch, violent convulsions and then nothing. But he'd seen it happen on the other side, the air had tasted of iron and he had been there as she exhaled her last breath.None of this would have happened if it wasn't for him. He now lived in a reality where Simmons didn't exist, and he couldn't save her. Not this time. He had been the cause, the evil. He was the one that needed to be defeated.The worst part of it was her eyes. She had looked at him with such despair, such disappointment at the man that he was, the man that he had become. The last thing she saw, the last time she would ever see him he hadn't been the man that she loved. He had been an abomination. And she would never know that they all made it out, that he came back to her. Scarred but more like the person she knew than the one she last saw.Ironically enough her death had been his trigger. Losing her had woken him up. Like Snow White or Sleeping Beauty. But the world he had woken up to wasn't better or beautiful, it was in ruins.He was at fault, and he had no longer anyone to tell him otherwise. Not that he deserved it anymore anyway. All that was good, all hope and all light had gone away. He was left with an empty husk. She wasn't here anymore, and it hurt just to look at her even from across the room. He couldn't make himself go near her, couldn’t take those few steps forward. He was no longer worthy of being in her presence, of touching her skin, feeling the real her beneath his fingers. Even from afar he could see bruises that she hadn't had when they had last been together. She had soldiered through though, had risked everything to get him back.And he had failed her by giving in. She had always been the strong one, refusing to give up. Ultimately taken a bullet for him, even though he didn't believe in her. She had given up her precious life for his miserable one. He could never repay her that. His debt would forever be too deep and he didn't know where he should go from here. His moral compass had been broken, mending it would take time. Doing it alone, without support, felt impossible. But he couldn't quit now, that would be to dishonor her memory. She was his guiding light, and he had always followed her willingly, storms had come and gone, but in the end he had been the one to blow out her candle. And now this world was as dark as the one led by Hydra.
|
10675833
|
drunk with power
|
{
"Archive Warning": "No Archive Warnings Apply",
"Category": "F/F",
"Characters": "Kara Danvers, Lena Luthor, Maggie Sawyer, Alex Danvers",
"Fandom": "Supergirl (TV 2015)",
"Language": "English",
"Rating": "Teen And Up Audiences",
"author": "by lilithschosen",
"chapters": "2/2",
"completed": "2017-04-23",
"published": "2017-04-19T00:00:00",
"words": "4,511",
"Additional Tags": "Minor Alex Danvers/Maggie Sawyer, drunk Lena looooool, the world needs more Alex/Lena brotp shenanigans i declare it right now",
"Relationship": "Kara Danvers/Lena Luthor",
"Character": null,
"Relationships": null,
"Series": "supercorp feels fest",
"Collections": null,
"Fandoms": null,
"Archive Warnings": null,
"Categories": null,
"Bookmarks": null,
"Chapters": null,
"Comments": null,
"Completed": null,
"Hits": null,
"Kudos": null,
"Published": null,
"Words": null,
"Updated": null
}
|
Kara was halfway out of her door, heading to her and Alex’s local spot around the block for their weekly drinking excursion. She nearly collides into Lena Luthor, a new friend over the last couple months.
“Oh, Kara!” Lena says, giving the girl a pearly white smile, “I was just coming over to ask if you were busy and have a night in with me.”
Kara returns the smile, locking her door behind her and stuffs her dorky Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles lanyard in her pocket before the classy woman would notice them. “I was actually just leaving to go hang out with my sister.”
Lena’s smile dims at the rejection, hand instinctively reaching up to the back of her neck, rubbing it as she steels herself to hopefully not have Kara witness her break. She averts her eyes, staring down at the floor. Kara catches the motions, eyes widening and shaking her head.
“You’re more than welcome to tag along, the more the merrier.”
Lena looks up, “I wouldn’t want to be a burden, I’ll just head home.”
As she spins around, a little too quickly, Kara reaches out and grabs her forearm just above her wrist, “You’ll be my plus one, besides it’s always Alex and Maggie, I hate being the third wheel on the Sanvers bike.”
Lena turns, biting her bottom lip as she gives a nod. Kara beams, letting her hand drop and loops her arm around Lena’s.
Linked together, the two descend to the bottom floor of the building via the stairs. Lena notices how Kara seems to bounce with every step and she finds herself chuckling at it. Kara doesn’t seem to pick it up, or so Lena can see, and she detaches herself when they approach the main doors.
She pushes one open, standing inside the building and bowing her head comically low to Lena.
Laughing, Lena curtsies and walks out onto the sidewalk, Kara following behind her.
“Such a gentlewoman,” Lena teases as she slips her hand around her friend’s bicep, “better than any boyfriend I’ve had.”
Starting down the way, Kara and Lena pick up a comfortable stream of conversation as they walk to their destination. They inform one another on what they’re working on, cheering each other on about their recent accomplishments and long term projects. Lena brings up that she had the alien detection device’s plans scrapped completely and deleted without a trace so no one could replicate it. Kara feels relieved, happy she could persuade the woman to drop the idea so quickly.
They reach the bar, and Lena freezes before taking a step inside.
“Are you absolutely sure I’m not intruding?”
Kara clicks her tongue, looking sternly at her friend, “If you abandon me now after I said I don’t like being a third wheel, I’ll never talk to you again.”
She attempts to give her meanest look, which breaks before too long into her giggling at herself. Lena rolls her eyes, the girl really didn’t have a rude bone in her body.
“I promise you’re not intruding, I want you here.”
With the affirmation, Lena stands up straight and enters the bar first.
Thankfully it’s not at all what she was thinking it would be. Music plays softly, mixing well with the rumble of the patrons talking. Kara pulls around her, waving excitedly at two women off in a booth in the corner. Instead of taking off as she normally does, she looks behind her and jerks her head up to indicate Lena should follow.
She does, hands stuffed in her coat to be somewhat nonchalant as Kara leads her to the booth.
“I wasn’t expecting you to bring a date, little Danvers,” Maggie jokes, lifting her bottle to her lips, “good to see you, Kara.”
Kara gives a loud and sarcastic “Ha,” at her sister’s girlfriend before ushering Lena to the booth. “This is Lena, she’s a friend of mine.”
Maggie raises her beer, nodding her head with a welcoming smile to Lena. Alex, knowing Lena from when she saved her the day Kara met the woman, just raises her eyebrows as she sips her beer.
“Kara said she didn’t like being a third wheel, so I thought I’d save her,” she tugs her coat off as she slides into the booth, placing it next to her at the table, “besides, I’m always up for some drinking.”
Kara sits next to Lena, glaring at her sister for not giving her friend a proper greeting. Alex sets her now empty bottle on the table and nudges Maggie.
“I’m gonna go get something stronger,” she announces, “do you two want anything?”
Kara amuses the thought for a moment, purely for show, but shakes her head. The Danvers duo exchange looks, laughing at one another.
“Whiskey, clean,” Lena says, “if you don’t mind. You were already heading for something stronger than the wheat juice you were drinking earlier.”
Maggie’s jaw drops, was the Luthor challenging her? Alex licks her teeth, eyeing the woman.
“You handle your liquor, Luthor?”
Lena sits back, trademark smirk on her lips, “There’s two things a Luthor can handle, that being their alcohol and themselves.”
Alex stands from the booth, saluting Lena with two fingers as she makes her way to the bar. Kara adjusts her glasses, glancing over to Maggie who just managed to lift her jaw up.
“You just challenged my sister to a drinking contest,” Kara states, baffled, “you do know that right?”
Lena looks at Kara through the corner of her eyes, “Watch the pros at work, Kara.”
Alex brings four glasses, holding them together in a square with her fingers, and sets them down between Lena and herself.
“The tab is open, loser has to close it,” Alex says, pushing two glasses in front of Lena, “we begin.”
Having drained her own beer, Maggie puts it toward the edge of the table for a waitress to take, and scoots closer to her girlfriend.
Lena grasps a glass, cheersing everyone at the table before she takes the entirety of the liquid into her mouth. She swallows it down with ease, eye giving a slight twitch at how it burns going down her throat.
As she places the glass down, she tilts her head to Alex, awaiting her to take her first drink as well.
Alex knocks it back, never breaking eye contact as she drops the glass to the table. Maggie rubs her arm in support, eager to watch the showdown continue on.
Kara on the other hand, watches in disbelief. What was supposed to be a relaxing night of jokes and laughing has turned into a competition. Was this how it would be from now on if she brought Lena back to hang out again?
“Lena, don’t do anything you’ll regret,” she whispers to her friend, “I don’t want to have to carry you home.”
Second drink in hand, she turns to Kara and winks. She sips this one, setting a pace to let herself be tipsy first. She can handle tipsy. If she takes too much drink too fast, she’ll lose. Lena Luthor doesn’t like to lose.
Alex takes her second glass, smug at Lena’s action. She shoots it like the first, setting her glass on the table. So far, she’s winning.
Maggie raises her hand, calling over the waitress. Lena takes the last sip of her drink, handing it to the waitress as she reaches the group. As Alex tells the woman the situation going down here, Lena examines her opponent. She’s already beginning to slouch forward, her shoulders slumping slightly.
“That’s why you pace yourself,” Lena mumbles to herself, watching the waitress nod and clear all of their empties. Sitting up in the booth, she clears her throat. “Are we continuing with whiskey or something else?”
“Shots.”
Alex leans against Maggie, still with the smug look, as she waits for the second wave of drinks.
The waitress appears, tray filled with various shots, eight all together. Maggie reaches across her girlfriend and helps the woman distribute them all. She gives Kara a sympathetic half smile, noting how the girl is sat there, before walking away.
Alex takes two shots back to back, swallowing both before the taste saturates her mouth. She stacks the empty shot glasses and waits for Lena.
Unable to pace herself, she sighs. She takes one of the shots, orange coloured liquor in the glass, and downs it. The warm, cinnamon flavour crawls up her throat and she feels she could exhale flames.
She cringes, “I hate fireball.”
Alex shrugs, “You didn’t say that before I took the order.” She grabs her shot of fireball, plants a kiss on Maggie’s mouth, and drains the shot.
Kara perks up, watching her sister kiss her girlfriend in public was something she still didn’t like to do despite being in a relationship for a bit now. She shuffles in the booth toward Lena and leans in to whisper in her ear.
“She doesn’t do that unless she is walking the line of tipsy into drunk,” Kara says, “you might win this.”
Alcohol starting to take effect, Lena’s better judgement is clouded as she wraps her arm around Kara’s waist to hold her close. She grabs the second fireball shot and offers her cheek expectantly to Kara.
Kara blushes furiously, realising what was going on. She pecks Lena’s cheek as fast as possible, her lips barely touching Lena’s skin.
“They’re copying us, babe,” Alex slurs, pointing to Maggie at the brief interaction between Kara and Lena, “so now it’s a drinking contest and a gay contest.”
Raising her shot to Alex, Lena laughs, “Two in which I beat you, Danvers.”
The empties the shot glass, stacking it and the one from before in Alex’s to make a small tower. Kara’s brow furrows in question at the admittance, was Lena gay? What is even happening now?
Lena grabs the two left on her side in her hands. She nudges Kara with her shoulder. As Kara turns to face her, about to ask why she did that, Lena presses her lips against Kara’s. Kara feels butterflies in her stomach, the faint taste of the various alcohol Lena consumed on her lips and how soft she is make her woozy.
She pulls away, a delicate smile on her mouth replacing Kara’s lips, and she takes both of the shots.
Completely dumbstruck, Kara tries to put everything together. Maybe Lena was just more drunk than she let on, making her do impulsive things? Yeah. That’s probably it.
Alex pushes one of her two to Lena, offering hers up in her hand. Lena takes Alex’s second, clinking it against her opponents as she laughs aloud. The two take their shots simultaneously.
Maggie and Kara make faces of confusion at one another, shrugging as neither of them know or understand what is happening now.
“You didn’t come off as a fellow lady lover, Lena,” Alex says, arms folded on the table, “nice to know you’re of the queer variety.”
She nods, “Not many know, actually. But it’s not like I care now, I’m extremely comfortable around you guys.”
Lena gives Kara a squeeze, remembering her arm is still around the girl.
“Well if this is a double date now, I want to give my blessing,” Alex’s slurring has grown worse, definitely drunk now, “as long as Kara is happy, I am happy.”
Lena snorts, startling Kara with a noise she never heard come from her friend or whatever she is possibly becoming. “I would sooner sell everything I own before I make her unhappy.”
The waitress passes by them, collects the rather tall tower now, and walks away before either of the inebriated women could order.
“Did she just cut us off?” Lena shouts, dropping her arm from Kara and lifts herself up, wobbling as she does, “I could go at least five more rounds.”
Maggie pats Alex’s chest, “She cut you both off because you’re plastered.”
Lena scoffs at her, “I am perfectly fine.”
As she stands awkwardly, not being able to fully stand due to the table in her way, she falls back onto the cushion. She laughs as her backsides hits the booth, definitely not “perfectly fine” as she said.
Kara steps out of the booth, offering Lena her hand, “I’m getting you out of here. It’s a tie, Maggie and I will split the bill.”
Grabbing Kara’s hand, Lena hoists herself out of the booth and trips into Kara’s arms, “Rematch next week, Alex.”
Alex stands from the booth, a slight stagger in her step as Maggie gets up behind her and secures her with both of her hands.
“No rematch,” Maggie says, grabbing her wallet from her back pocket, “Kara don’t worry about it, I got it. You two head home, I’ll text you when we get in.”
Kara holds Lena upright, pulling her arm around her shoulder as she wraps hers under the woman’s arms. “I agree,” she responds, “no rematch.”
Lena sticks her tongue out at Kara, blowing raspberries at the girl as she’s walked away from the others.
They manage to make it out of the bar in one piece, Kara having to use her strength to lift the woman up at various points of their journey to the street.
“You’re staying with me,” Kara declares, letting the woman go for a moment, “you’re way too drunk to be left alone.”
Lena hums, determined to stay standing on her own, “You’re so good to me, Kara.”
Rolling her eyes, Kara lifts Lena into her arms bridal style. Lena cackles at the action, kicking her feet as Kara starts toward her apartment building.
“You’re so wonderful, you know,” Lena says, eyelids heavy, “you’re always there to take care of me. I’m so grateful for you.”
Kara smiles in response, “I’m grateful for you too, Lena.”
Lena shakes her head, “No, not like that. I’m grateful for you in a romantic way.”
Kara looks down at the woman in her arms, “Oh yeah?”
“Of course,” Lena says, “you’re this amazing puppy in human form.”
Kara cocks her head to the side as she continues walking, not sure how that really makes sense.
“See?” Lena exclaims, “you did the confusion head tilt that puppies do. You even have the puppy dog eyes.”
Silently praying to Rao, Kara keeps walking. Lena continues her humming from before, nodding her head along to her own song.
As Kara rounds the corner, her building in sight, Lena’s humming gets louder.
“I just love your puppy dog eyes,” she sings, looking up at Kara, “I wanna be between your puppy dog thighs.”
She nearly drops the woman on the pavement at that. “Lena?”
Lena gives a grin in response, wiggling her eyebrows at the girl carrying her.
“We’re talking about this in the morning, you know,” Kara says as she approaches her building, “as well as everything you did tonight.”
Standing at the main door to her building, Lena wiggles free from Kara’s grasp and grabs the door to open it. Kara jumps ahead of her, opening the door herself and pushes the woman inside.
“You’ll have to remind me of it all because I’m not gonna remember.”
Grabbing Lena before she wanders off, Kara sighs. “Of course you won’t.”
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
Coming to consciousness, Lena is greeted by an immense wave of nausea and a splitting headache. She doesn’t dare open her eyes, just the light she can see through her lids makes her head pound harder.
Despite the bare minimum she remembers, she has a looming feeling of guilt and regret. Regret she even went to the bar. Guilt for some reason she’ll more than likely find out later on in the day.
Did she really try to drink more than Kara’s sister?
She lifts her hand from under the covers and pinches the bridge of her nose, parts of the night coming back to her.
Never again was she going to consume that much demon poison again. Beer, maybe. But hard liquor? Why did she think she was so slick, drinking two glasses of whiskey and then how many shots?
She groans, rolling over in bed, pushing her face into a pillow. She inhales slowly, hoping she won’t suddenly hurl whatever contents she has in her stomach all over her sheets.
As the scent from the pillow hits her brain, she stills.
That’s not the faint smell of her laundry detergent.
She opens her eyes just a crack.
This isn’t her bed.
The cream pillow case and what she can see of the matching bedspread are definitely not her signature royal blue ones. Where the hell is she?
“Look who finally woke up,” Kara’s gentle voice soothes the throb at Lena’s temples, “how are you feeling?”
Lena lifts her head up slightly, eyes opening more as she looks up at the girl next to the bed. “I feel like death.”
Kara gives a knowing smile from the doorway of her bedroom, walking toward the now somewhat awake and alive woman. “Surprisingly for a woman who has always been the most beautiful in the entire city, you look it too.”
She grasps the pill bottle on the nightstand, uncapping it and gently trying to fish two capsules from within without making too much noise. She puts them in her hand, extending it to Lena to take.
“First, we’ll fix your hangover,” Kara says as Lena takes the pills from her, “then we’ll have our talk.”
She takes the red bottle of powerade on the table as well, unscrewing the cap, offering it to Lena as well.
Lena sighs at her, not exactly looking forward to confronting the shit she did last night.
She holds the pills between her lips, groggily attempting to keep them in place as she reaches for the drink. She sucks the pills into her mouth, taking a gulp of drink to wash them down.
After drinking half of it, she hands it to Kara. She flops back onto the bed as Kara closes the bottle and places it back on the table.
“So,” Kara says, “what do you remember?”
Lena shuts her eyes, unable to handle the stream of sunlight coming in through the windows. “I remember seeing your sister kiss her girlfriend. I had shots of fireball and I hate myself. Other than that, it’s bits and pieces.”
Kara nods as Lena lists everything off, noticing she left out both of their kisses. Maybe she doesn’t actually remember them.
“Do you remember anything that happened between us?”
Lena turns her head on the pillow, opening an eye, “I kissed your cheek, and I think you carried me here? Which doesn’t make sense because you’re so small, how could you possibly carry me so far?”
Kara covers her mouth with a couple fingers as she laughs. Lena shoots a glare at her, thinking the girl was mocking her.
“Well, allow me to fill you in on the rest of the details.”
She sits down alongside Lena, crossing her legs as if she were at a sleepover telling stories, and leans in.
“First you declared you’re gay, which took me by surprise,” Kara starts, counting on her fingers, “before that you kissed my cheek, as you know.”
Lena shoots up from the bed, hangover be damned, as Kara retells the story of last night.
“I swear I was going to tell you,” Lena rushes, “I know it’s not fair when friends aren’t truthful and I was going to tell you.”
Kara laughs, not hiding it this time. She places a hand on Lena’s shoulder, giving her an affectionate squeeze.
“I don’t care that you’re gay, you goob,” she says, “also I’m not mad, it’s your thing to tell me.”
A small smile blooms from the response, of course Kara wouldn’t be mad. She’s the most loving person, like a puppy.
Like a puppy.
Puppy.
“Oh fuck.”
She remembers it. She remembers her singing in Kara’s arms. She remembers planting the kiss on the girl before taking her final shot of the night. She remembers how she couldn’t control herself around her friend, the one she’s been pining over since the day they met.
She wants to run. She wants to hide herself away, embarrassed that one stupid night made her essentially confess it all in a couple hours.
Lena holds her head in her hands, clenching her eyes tight, hoping this was all a nightmare and she’d wake up. That none of this happened at all.
Kara takes a moment, letting Lena have time to herself before she sits a little bit closer to the woman in her bed.
“You know,” she starts, “I’m not mad at that either.”
Lena doesn’t move, frozen in fear to even acknowledge Kara.
“Sure that wasn’t how I thought our first kiss would go, but we can always have a retry.”
What did she mean that wasn’t how she
thought
it would go? Did she think of this before?
Lena peeks through her fingers at the lopsided smile Kara has, “What?”
“You heard me, punk,” she says, reaching to cup Lena’s chin in her hand, “don’t get all awkward because you let yourself go and got drunk. Which, Luthors are apparently huge liars because they can’t handle themselves or their alcohol.”
Blushing, Lena averts her eyes, “Normally we can, I must be the exception.”
Kara pulls Lena into her, wrapping her arms around the woman. Lena lets her head rest on Kara’s shoulder, resisting the urge to hide her face in the crook of her neck.
“I’m sorry,” she says, “I never knew what to say.”
Kara laughs, making sure she’s quiet to not disturb Lena’s throbbing skull, “You sure said enough last night.”
God, she knows how this’ll be.
She picks her head up off Kara’s shoulder, pouting.
“You can’t pick on me, I’m in pain.”
Kara tightens her hold on Lena, throwing both of them back onto the bed, giggling as she does. Despite the hangover, Lena smiles too.
She adjusts her head on Kara’s chest, strategically placing her hand somewhere that wasn’t going to make her even more embarrassed as she takes a moment to appreciate what happened.
Kara twirls a thick strand of Lena’s hair around her finger, smiling herself as she closes her eyes and relaxes. She’s always felt warm in Lena’s presence, but she never acknowledged it. That feeling that no matter what was happening, everything would be okay. She found a great human, a human that makes her feel ways no one else ever did.
She presses a kiss into Lena’s hair, a soft and gentle one that makes her feel fuzzy from head to toe.
Lena sighs, content with her life at the moment. The nausea and headache have started to subside, thankfully.
But just as she thought she was comfortable, Kara starts to hum.
“No,” Lena warns, “Kara don’t.”
Kara continues, ignoring Lena’s pleas.
“I just love your puppy dog eyes,” Kara holds Lena in place as the woman struggles to move from her grasp, “I wanna be between your puppy dog thighs.”
Kara’s arms must be actually steel beams, Lena can’t get through. She thrashes, kicking her legs about on the bed as she can barely turn to give herself time to duck under.
“Where did you even come up with that?” Kara questions, letting her grip loosen so Lena could break away, “like honestly how does it even make sense because I still don’t understand.”
Lena scrambles away from the girl, jumping from the bed and standing a couple feet away. She huffs and puffs, running her fingers through her hair as the adrenaline from her fight against Kara dies down.
“Don’t question it,” Lena says, “I don’t get it either.”
Kara sits up, amused smirk on her face, “To think Lena Luthor would serenade a mere reporter in such a way.”
Quickly grabbing a discarded shirt on the ground, Kara’s from a couple days prior, Lena balls it up and throws it at the girl mocking her.
“Yeah well, not many girls get the whole romance like you apparently do.”
Kara grabs the balled shirt in midair, laughing as she does. “Oh, I’m so lucky, aren’t I?”
As the two continue on in their playful fight, Kara’s phone lights up and vibrates loudly against the bedside table. She puts her hand up, silencing Lena mid taunt, and answers her phone.
“Hey Alex,” her cheerful tone makes her sister cringe on the other line, “oh, hungover?”
Alex groans, “I am never drinking with Lena literally ever again.”
Kara hears Maggie cackle in the distance and Alex shush her. Lena comes back to the bed after her daring escape and leans her head on Kara’s shoulder, sitting down next to her.
“It’s not my fault your pride was wounded at a stranger challenging you,” Kara jokes, “but to be fair, Lena is a little worse for wear right now.”
Lena nudges Kara, “Yeah, but I’m able to sit up and move, clearly I won.”
Kara yanks the phone from her ear as Alex starts to defend herself, shouting into the device denial of Lena’s victory.
“No, absolutely no way,” Alex goes on as Lena affixes an invisible crown on her head, “I definitely was not as drunk as you were.”
Pulling the phone back to her ear, “You both were pretty drunk, you couldn’t stand without Maggie touching you. I ended up carrying Lena because her heels, didn’t want her to twist her ankle.”
Alex grumbles into the phone, something Kara can’t decypher. “Did I remember correctly that you and Lena kissed at the booth?”
Smug smile on her face, Lena goes to respond but Kara pulls away before she can.
“Possibly,” Kara replies, treading carefully, “why?”
Alex clears her throat on the other line, “I wanted to make sure it wasn’t a weird dream. I love you, Kara, and only want the best for you. Now put her on the phone.”
Dumbfounded, Kara hands the phone off to Lena, did Alex just give her blessing? Technically she gave it last night, but this is her sober blessing. She actually means it.
“Rematch,” Alex says, “a week from now, when we can stomach the thought of alcohol again. I’m taking you down, Luthor. Also, I mean what I said last night. Make her happy.”
“You have nothing to worry about,” Lena looks at Kara as she speaks, “but, you do. You’re going down, older Danvers.”
She ends the call, passing the phone back to Kara. Kara shakes her head, placing her phone back on the bedside table.
“You are not drinking like that again,” Kara warns, “I’ll take care of you, because I’m like that, but please.”
Lena gives the girl a reassuring look, kissing her shoulder, “Think of it as bonding time for her and I, you want your sister to like your girlfriend, right?”
She stands back up from the bed, walking toward the doorway as she turns and winks at Kara before heading to the bathroom.
Kara sits in stunned silence. “Girlfriend?”
|
10690185
|
just lovers
|
{
"Archive Warning": "No Archive Warnings Apply",
"Category": "F/F",
"Characters": "Dwalin, Nori",
"Fandom": "The Hobbit - All Media Types",
"Language": "English",
"Rating": "Teen And Up Audiences",
"author": "by Saraste",
"chapters": "1/1",
"completed": "",
"published": "2017-04-21T00:00:00",
"words": "100",
"Additional Tags": "Drabble, Introspection, Casual Sex",
"Relationship": "Dwalin/Nori",
"Character": null,
"Relationships": null,
"Series": "An April of Drabbles",
"Collections": null,
"Fandoms": null,
"Archive Warnings": null,
"Categories": null,
"Bookmarks": null,
"Chapters": null,
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Dwalin shouldn’t let Nori into her bed, she knows better,
should
know better, but yet she often enough finds herself in her bed with Nori, all her good decisions discarded.
Nori isn’t good for her nor does she feel she is good for Nori, either.
Yet… it
is
Nori who keeps coming back, insinuating herself into Dwalin’s arms, her lips of Dwalin’s lips, her slim body pressed to Dwalin’s muscle.
In Dwalin’s bed they lose all sense, where they are just a pair of lovers and nothing more. Nori is eager and attentive, and Dwalin can’t tell her to leave.
|
10665816
|
podfic three is the
|
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"chapters": "1/1",
"completed": "",
"published": "2017-04-18T00:00:00",
"words": "8",
"Additional Tags": "Alternate Universe - College/University, Polyamory, the best kind of love triangle, Podfic, Audio Format: MP3, Podfic Length: 30-45 Minutes",
"Relationship": null,
"Character": null,
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|
download from dropbox
mp3 / 39:53 / 38.3MB
|
10661688
|
Chasing Nataly
|
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"Characters": "Tom Hiddleston, Original Female Character(s)",
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"Rating": "Teen And Up Audiences",
"author": "by Allthatnerdyshit",
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|
March 2011Nataly’s graduation party“Thank you for coming to my niece’s surprise graduation party. Well I am your boss here so you kinda had to be here or I would have fired you. She will be coming soon so
Be ready to congratulate her.” Said Joss Whedon.Everyone in the bar/ diner was laughing.“But also I wanted to have some sort of get together before we start filming The Avenger next week. All the cast is here and a great majority of the crew is here to celebrate the hope that is the Avengers, but also celebrate my niece’s getting her masters with high honors in political science from NYU.” Said Joss as everyone took a shot. Then Joss walked to the Avengers cast to talk to them while all of them were in a corner.“This Nataly must be super smart to go to NYU, my younger sister went to that school.” Said Chris Evans.“Nataly is literally one of the most hard working girls you'll ever meet and she really is because is raising her sister and going to school-” Joss was cut off by Robert Downey Jr.“Raising her sister?” Robert Downey Jr. asked in confusion.“How old is your niece?” Ask Tom Hiddleston while taking a sip of wine:“What happened to her parents?” Asked Scarlett.“Nataly and her little sister, Izzy, struggled a lot these past few years. My nieces are not even related to me, I was really good friends with their father when their father and I were in high school. I moved into the career path and he started to have a family. That was the only thing he wanted in life. I was always around these girls lives so much that they call me Uncle. My friend and his family lived in Las Vegas and after a week of Nataly getting her Bachelor's in Political Science from UNLV her parents died in a car accident in the Las Vegas freeway by a drunk driver. Nataly was already getting ready to go to New York to get her Masters in political science, but since Nataly was over the age of twenty one she was Izzy's legal guardian. Remainder she is a college graduate that has no job and now is stuck to raise a thirdteen year old girl. Nataly was so close not going to NYU, she called the school explaining her situation and the school gave her a permanent dorm for her and Izzy. Free of charge. You might be asking, “where is Joss in this situation?”. I am super busy writing the Avengers; but by the time Nataly called me to inform everything that happen she had a plan. She was taking Izzy to New York with her, and she will attend school while raising lzzy. Luckily, NYU paid her to go to their school so money wasn't even an issue.” Said Joss as he takes a big drink of Tom’s wine, Tom look offended.“That Nataly is truly inspiration, like I look at myself and question my abilities now.” Said Tom in almost a hint of envy.“Motherfucker Hiddleston, you went to fucking Cambridge.” Said Robert Downey Jr as he was annoyed by Tom.“Nataly is working on set of the Avengers so you can ask her inspirational advice, I guess.” Said Joss while taking another sip from Tom’s wine.“She majored in Politics, why is she going to work for a film?” Asked Evans.“Because Disney wants to prevent any legal issues from happening and Nataly knows all the laws forwards and backwards. She is our legal guide. Anyways, since she was never a legal guided a film before Disney got her pretty cheap for someone in that job category. It's more as a summer job, she's planning moving out from New York after Izzy graduates High School. From there the two will most likely go on their separate ways, Nataly wants to get a job in Politics in a Liberal area. She mention wanting to work for the mayor of San Francisco and work her way up. Izzy wants to be a doctor and wants to go to George Washington University.” Joss takes another shot. “Tuition is ducking expensive”Everyone in the Avengers started to laugh.“They're here.” Yelled a person who was looking at of the window of the bar/dinner. The light turned off. Everyone was silent.Now let me tell you what's going on in Tom's mind. He really wanted to meet Nataly, he was excited like a little boy was going to meet Santa.A shadow of Nataly and Izzy would be seen through the window.“Oh no, there is obviously no people at weird as bar or diner . Hey Izzy, let's totally be Rebels and sneak in.” Said Nataly in an extreme sarcasm.“Wait let me get handy Rebel song while we are at it.” Said Izzy and all the sudden Rebel by David Bowie could be heard playing outside of the diner/ bar.“Yeah, my nieces are special” said Joss while hiding behind a chair that clearly didn't cover him and everyone was laughing.“What great sense humor they have.” Said Tom while laughing at their shadows from the outside of the window dancing.“They get it from their mother.” “We should really stop our Rebel madness.”said Nataly as the music stop playing. “Let's go to the surprise party that Uncle Joss totally planned.”“Act surprised Nataly.” Said Izzy. Nataly burst into the diner/bar of course everyone yelled surprise.Tom could hear Nataly saying again in sarcasm “A surprise party I had no idea.” Joss popped out from the place he was hiding and walked to both Nataly and Izzy.“You are always snarly, Nataly. Congratulations, sorry I wasn't able to attend your graduation.” Said Joss while pulling Nataly in for a hug.Tom was trying to get a view of Nataly but couldn't, he could see a clear view of Izzy. She had a haircut that was short on the sides but long on top. Wearing fitted slack grey pants. A white button down with a black tie. Also, wearing circular glasses.Finally, Joss broke his hug from Nataly and went to hug lzzy. Nataly had medium length curly hair. Her skin tone a golden. Nataly was wearing a black crop top that highlighted her breast. Sunflower pattern pencil skirt that made her butt seem perfectly rounded. Tom was attracted to Nataly immediately. Nataly was making eye contact with Tom.Joss let's go of lzzy and picks a glasses, he starts handing them to Nataly and Izzy.“Everyone let's raise our glass, um Izzy I got you apple juice for you can toast, let's toast to Nataly and congratulate of her graduation.” Said joss. After the toast was done, immediately Tom approaches Nataly.“Your uncle told me you are quite educated in Politics?” Said Tom while smiling at Nataly. Up close he notice her hazel eyes and her hair has a ombré. “My uncle told me to stay away from actors.” Said Nataly as she took a step back from Tom.From then on, Tom started to chase Nataly.
|
10679430
|
All the Pretty Noises
|
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Sebastian looks at the monstrosity in the playroom. Last he and Chris played in it, the biggest piece in here was the Saint Andrew’s Cross. Now there’s a seated chest press right in the middle of it. It’s not the fanciest piece of gym equipment. Probably a few years old; maybe even used. The weights are all set up already, even adjusted to the amount he uses during his current workout routines. The whole thing’s been recently cleaned. Sebastian can still smell the scent of the cleaner that lingers in the air. Still, the question remains. “Chris?”First answer he gets is the blender, who doesn’t give him much help. Sebastian rolls his eyes. Unfair of him, really. The blender’s probably just making Chris a protein shake. But he’s really curious about this very random piece of equipment in the playroom. “Chris?” Sebastian calls again when the blender shuts off. “Yeah, babe?”“Can you come in here for a second?”The response to that is simply coming that way. Chris doesn’t even ask where he is. He simply strolls into the playroom with that protein shake in his hand and hands it to Sebastian. “Here,” Chris says. “You should drink that.” Sebastian takes the drink absently. Even takes a sip without thinking about it. It’s good. Fruity. A hint of chocolate. Then it occurs to him that he’s standing here drinking a protein shake and Chris is acting like having a chest press in the playroom is completely commonplace.“What is going on, Chris?” he asks. “Are we turning our playroom into a gym?”It’s a joke, of course. The thought of them exchanging their vibrators and bonds and crops and other various toys for weights and resistance bands and treadmills is humorous. But when Chris just glances at him with raised eyebrows, for one brief － and admittedly, frightening － moment, Sebastain’s worried that he might actually say yes to that.Relief shoots through him like a rock tossed into a pond, spreading from navel out to every hair on his body, when Chris laughs. “Of course not,” Chris murmurs. Pets a hand over Sebastian’s head and brings him closer. “How could I ever do that?”Sebastian leans against him. Pokes Chris’s rib with his finger and tries to glare, but it’s hard when Chris is still petting him like that. “You’re very mean, sir,” he mutters instead. “Do you know that?”Chris barks a laugh. Sebastian’s favorite laugh. Unreserved and loud and full of so much life he’s very sure it could make the sun come up on a rainy day. “I have my moments,” Chris agrees. “But I think I can be nice, too, don’t you?”Sebastian twists his lips. “Debatable. But you’re somewhat agreeable on your best days.”Smiling, Chris kisses Sebastian’s forehead and then taps the bottom of the cup Sebastian still has in his hand. “Drink up,” he says. “You’re gonna need it.” “Why?” Sebastian asks. “What’s this all about?”All he gets in response to his question are more instructions. Chris once again tells him to drink the shake and then tells him to change. Just to be a smartass, Sebastian considers asking into what. He opts for being good and just changes into his workout clothes after finishing the drink. When Sebastian gets back to the playroom, he nearly faints at what he sees. Chris has changed as well. Into the clothes he wears at the gym where he works as a personal trainer. Pants tight at the hips. Shirt that looks ready to burst at the seams. Arm muscles just bulging.How Sebastian’s not drooling at the sight of it all is beyond him. He blushed like crazy the first time he saw Chris at the gym. Sebastian was so distracted by him that his own instructor, Don, had to shout his name just to get his attention again. “Are you ready, Seb?”Chris’s voice settles over him like a gentle fog. If Sebastian let himself, he’d get lost in it already. There’s only one problem. “Ready for what, Chris?”Chris smirks and eases on over, sea shine eyes dark with a smolder that makes lightning curl around Sebastian’s spine. “For your workout.” He cups a strong hand under Sebastian’s chin. Possessive, but gentle. The touch going straight to Sebastian’s cock. “I was thinking… those videos Don posts on Instagram… they make me kinda jealous.” “Jealous, Chris?”“Mhm.” Chris’s nose skims against his his. He coaxes Sebastian’s chin up like he might kiss him, but doesn’t. “You make such pretty noises that I don’t get to hear. They almost sound like the noises I get to hear.” Sebastian flushes and would look away if Chris wasn’t holding him in place. “But I still think I should get to hear them.”It’s hard to think clearly when Chris leans so close to him that their lips just brush. He doesn’t let Sebastian steal a kiss when he tries. Not even when Sebastian whimpers. “Now answer my question, Seb,” Chris says. That sweet, tender voice coating Sebastian in the dominance that makes him shudder. “Are you ready?”“Yes,” Sebastian whispers. “Yes, sir.” “Good boy, Seb,” Chris praises, and Sebastian practically melts under his touch and lips when he finally kisses him. Long and hard and perfect. “Let’s start warming up.” They start off normally. This is just for fun, Sebastian knows that, so they’re not going to be focusing on anything in particular. Chris just gives him stretches to do. Basic ones that Sebastian does at the gym every week for various exercises. For his neck and hamstrings and triceps. It’s when they move onto lunges that Sebastian begins to figure out the game Chris is playing. Chris’s hand is at his left hip. To help with his posture, so he claims. Sebastian’s holding still like Chris told him to when Chris’s hand starts to sneak across his thigh. A gasp catches in Sebastian’s throat. His eyes dart to Chris. “Shh, it’s okay.” Chris’s other hand rubs his hip. “I’ve got you. Keep your position, Seb.” “Chris…” Sebastian whimpers when Chris’s hand rubs his semi-hard cock through his thin pants. He squeezes his eyes closed and trembles. “Rahat…”“Don’t move, precious.” He kisses up and down Sebastian’s neck. “I know you can do it. Breathe, Seb.”He lets out the breath Chris is talking about and holds the lunge just a few seconds longer before Chris has him straighten up again. Before Sebastian receives any praise, Chris has him bend the other knee forward and the whole thing starts again. “Chris…” Sebastian takes in a deep breath when he’s hard enough that Chris take a nice grip around his cock. “Oh…” “And…” Chris counts down from five. “Good. Come on up. Good boy. I knew you could do it.” Sebastian isn’t usually out of breath from just a couple of stretches, but right now he can barely catch it. “You’re… you’re gonna do that…” He shakes his head at Chris. “You’re gonna do that the whole time, aren’t you?”Sebastian loves confident Chris. The Chris that will come in here and take him over his knee and spank him until his backside is glowing pink for days. Sebastian loves nervous Chris. The Chris that will fiddle with long, artistic fingers and stumble over a knotted tongue just to get a single sentence out. Sebastian loves goofy Chris. The Chris that will laugh so hard he grabs his chest and slides out of his seat. Sebastian loves this man with all of his heart and more. Especially when that smirk curves up on Chris’s face and he cups Sebastian’s cheeks between his hands so he can kiss him.“Baby,” Chris says, “tonight I’m gonna have you making all sorts of noises that are just for me.”Chris is guiding him to his hands and knees before Sebastian can even whimper. More stretching, Chris says. Stretching doesn’t usually involve anyone lowering Sebastian’s pants. Today it does. Because today doesn’t just involve stretching out muscles for a workout. It doesn’t take all that long for Chris to get him stretched and opened for three fingers to slide on in. Last night’s activities have left him still a little loose. To have Sebastian breathing hard and heavy and wanting so badly not to have to hold his own weight up any longer so he can just enjoy what Chris is doing to him pretty quickly. Enough that the medium-sized vibrator Chris has all lubed up simply makes Sebastian groan and push back for more. Chris chuckles. “Excited?”“I think so,” Sebastian answers. “You can be very tricky, sir.” Smirking, Chris presses a kiss into the corner of Sebastian’s mouth. He then proceeds to tease him. Moves the vibrator in and out. Shifts. Test around until Sebastian is slamming his palm on the floor and crying to all the sunbeams that twirl around the room whenever sparks crackle through his body. Sebastian is panting and breathless by the time Chris shows him a little mercy and stops the teasing. First helping Sebastian to his feet, Chris makes sure he’s steady on his feet before showing him the remote to the vibrator. “You ready for squats?”“O Doamne…” Sebastian whispers. “Yes, sir.” Petting a hand over his head, Chris kisses his brow and grins. “So good. So good for me. I’ll help you through them. Just ten. But first…”The vibrator goes on. A vibrator going on inside of Sebastian has never made him leap out of his skin the way it does today. Already he’s weak at the knees and spacey and wants to fall into Chris’s arms. Sebastian gets started then. As best he can. Bends his knees to squat and only forces the vibrator to hit that spot every single time. More sounds happen. Just like Chris wanted. Whimpers that crawl up Sebastian’s throat and fall off his lips to go skipping about the playroom. As promised, Chris helps him. He stands right behind him, hands just under his shoulders to guide him back into place whenever he sways. Which is a lot. Whenever he pauses, dropping his head back on Chris’s shoulder, Chris doesn’t make it easy. He kisses up and down his neck. Slips his hands just beneath the brim of Sebastian’s pants. Chris is nibbling on Sebastian’s ear when he finally finishes the squats, and Sebastian has never been so relieved and disappointed to be finished with a set of squats before. “See now?” Chris murmurs. Tongue still flicking Sebastian’s earlobe. “That wasn’t so bad, was it?”“Mm-mm.” The vibrator is still on. Sebastian grinds back against Chris. “Not too… oh…”The vibrator switches off and Chris sits him down on his lap to let him catch his breath. There’s even a bottle of water there － Sebastian has no idea where Chris got it from － and Chris holds it to his lips to give him little sips. Sebastian just rests his head against Chris’s chest. Listens to the calm beating of his heart while his own pounds wildly out of rhythm. He shifts about in Chris’s laps. A little uncomfortable with the vibrator shoved inside of him and so worked up with no hope for relief in sight just yet. It hardly matters though. Not with Chris running his fingers up and down his spine. Sending a tingle down to the very tips of his toes. After a few minutes of resting like that, Chris kisses the top of his head and eases out from under him. “Okay,” he says. “We’re gonna do some back stretches. But…”As he helps Sebastian back to his hands and knees like he was before, Chris starts lowering his pants again. He first takes the vibrator and Sebastian’s not sure if he’d not rather have it in. The point is moot though, when Chris just tosses it aside. He doesn’t lift Sebastian’s pants again though, just leaving him bare-assed to start those stretches. So that Chris can spank him through them, his palm slapping against Sebastian’s ass every time he returns to a start position.Each slap echoes through the room. Every grunt that Sebastian makes chases it. They meet together somewhere in the middle.Neither the stretching nor the spanking is nearly as intense as they have been in the past, but having them happen at the same time is maddening. Sebastian doesn’t know what to focus on. The burn in back as he stretches his spine or the burn that flares across his ass afterwards. It’s all so very confusing. Yet all so very worth it when Chris leans over him to murmur into his ear, “You’re doing so good, Seb,” and Sebastian’s bones melt. Chris reaches under Sebastian’s chest to start fiddling with his right nipple. Sebastian had no idea just how sensitive they’d get while working out but the second Chris’s fingers give a little squeeze he yelps and shudders and wants so badly to pull away or curl into himself. He does neither. Instead, he manages to steady himself.“You should see yourself right now,” Chris says. Low and heated. His fingers still twisting and rolling that nipple. “Dripping in sweat. Ass all pink and pretty. Pants down around your ankles.” Embarrassment flushes through Sebastian, rushing from his cheeks and right into his cock, so full and heavy. Aching. Save for those few teasing touches earlier, Chris has totally neglected it. Now that Sebastian’s noticed, it’s all he can think about. Until Chris, easing up on the tormenting twisting of Sebastian’s nipple, says, “Okay. Time for sit-ups.”“Do I at least get to pull my pants up?” Sebastian asks as he rolls over onto his back. Sebastian’s pants are still down when Chris gets into position to hold his feet and legs still. His eyebrows are up, mischievous smirk on his lips, when he looks down at him. “Did I say you could pull your pants up?”Before Sebastian can answer, Chris is picking up a bottle of lube from somewhere next to them. It’s not the same he used before. This one is berry scented. There’re bottles of lube in every corner of this room － in nearly every room of their place really since sometimes they just don’t have the patience to wait － but Sebastian suspects Chris didn’t want to have to move away from him in even the slightest inch to get one.Chris flips open the cap and squeezes just enough on the head of Sebastian’s cock that it begins to dribble down the sides. He doesn’t do any more than that though. All he does is tell Sebastian to start with fifteen reps. Just like Chris wants, Sebastian does make noise. Grunts. Groans. Whines. Noises he’s sure he’s never made before. Every time he pulls himself up, his cock rubs against his belly, smearing the lube just a little more. Sometimes, Chris will be just so kind enough to guide Sebastian’s cock away from his belly so it doesn’t happen. By the time Sebastian’s reached fifteen he doesn’t know if he wants to beg to be fucked or beg for release or beg for more. He just drops his upper body to the floor. Out of breath and drained as though he’s done an hour’s work out with Don when in reality he’s pretty sure he’s only done some stretching and sit-ups for about twenty-five minutes with Chris teasing him most of the time. “Chris…” he breathes. “I…”“You’re such a good boy, Seb,” Chris whispers. “Doing just what I ask.” There’s a hand at Sebastian’s cheek. Soft. Still, it’s the words that cradle him. Make him lose focus enough that his brain becomes fuzzy. Like it’s made of those pins and needles when his foot falls asleep. The hand needs to tap a little to bring him back and make him aware that Chris is speaking again. “You with me, baby?” he’s asking. “Check in, Seb. Gimme a color.”Chris’s face comes back into view when Sebastian blinks and clears his mind of those fuzzies. “Da.” Oh, wait. Not English. “Verde.” Okay, still not English. Sebastian heaves in a deep breath, and on the exhale, “Green.” Smiling, Chris leans in and pecks a kiss to the very tip of Sebastian’s nose. “You’re too fuckin’ adorable, kid.” Sebastian would smile back at him, but he never gets the chance. Chris’s hand is suddenly around his cock. Stroking. Slow. Soft. And all Sebastian does is moan and ease into it, helpless to do anything else. Though there’re no actual bonds as there have been before － no ropes, no cuffs, no scarves － he simply cannot move. Knees trembling, Sebastian’s hips begin to lift in rhythm with Chris’s stroking until Chris’s other hand pins him back down. “Now,” he says, hand still wrapped around Sebastian’s cock, “gimme fifteen more.”“Oh.” Sebastian bites his lip and attempts to pull his arms back in front of his chest. “But… Chris…”Whatever it is he’s trying to say － and really, Sebastian’s not exactly sure what he’s trying to say anyway － get’s caught off with a muffled groan when Chris’s thumb runs over the slit of Sebastian’s cock. He spreads the precome and slides his hand down to the base and back up again.“You can do it, Seb,” he encourages. “Come on, good boy. Fifteen more sit-ups. Otherwise I’m gonna let go of your pretty little cock.” The thought of Chris letting go now is just torturous so Sebastian gathers what strength he can and picks himself up. Feels the burn to his abs. The burn in his thighs. And the unbelievable sensation that shoots through his entire body as Chris continues to stroke him through every sit-up he does. Or tries to do. It’s somehow the most horrible and most amazing workout Sebastian’s ever done. Tears prick the corners of his eyes. Every inch of his body is shaking. His muscles are coiled around his bones, ready to explode on Chris’s command and not a moment sooner. “Chris… sir…” he grunts at number thirteen. Those tears now leaking down the sides of his face. “Please.” “Two more, Seb,” Chris says. “You got this.”Nodding, Sebastian pulls himself up once. Meets the most wonderful approving eyes in the world and knows right away he can do it one more time. Even just to find himself lost in those eyes again. So he does. Sebastian lowers himself down and hurries back up for that one last sit-up. This time, instead of just finding himself in the glow of Chris’s pleased and happy eyes, Sebastian is pulled into a glorious kiss. Chris, as though he can no longer help himself, is suddenly crawling all over him. Fingers knot through Sebastian’s hair, keeping his head where Chris wants so that he can tease him with his tongue. Without pulling their lips apart for more than a second, Chris works their shirts off over their heads. He starts grinding over Sebastian. Rubs their cocks together and the friction of Chris’s pants over Sebastian’s bare cock makes him cry out in all the amazing torment he could ask for. Arms snake under his back and Sebastian is suddenly being hoisted up onto Chris’s lap, his legs wrapped around his waist once he kicks one shoe off and manages to fling a pant leg away from his ankle. Chris chuckles at his efforts, never breaking their kissing. The back of his hand cups his neck to lock him there.Sunlight pours through Sebastian, he’s sure of it. Kissing Chris like this is like awakening to the brightest of dawns. Lifts Sebastian to a sky that swirls with pink clouds and pastel rainbows. Soaring. “Sebastian, answer me, babe.”The sunlight flickers. Sebastian opens his eyes. Let’s the afternoon drenched in deep, golden rays blossom around him again. “Chris…” He blinks. “Yes?”Chris smiles. “Good. I’ve got one more thing for you. You think you can do it? Or are you too far gone?”Chris’s gaze flick over Sebastian’s head. Sebastian tilts his in that direction. Takes a peek and remembers what started this whole thing. The chest press. He glowers at it, but it simply regards him with a proud and unwavering sentiment. It won’t back down, and really, it’d be a shame not to find out why Chris has invited it here. “No,” Sebastian mumbles. “I mean, yes.” He shakes his head. “Whichever of those means keep going.” “Mm.” Chris nuzzles into Sebastian’s neck. “Such a good boy. C’mon then. One more thing for you to do for me.”He slides out from under him and takes his other shoe off. Chris continues taking off Sebastian’s socks and pants until he’s completely naked. Then, he goes over to the chest press, leaving Sebastian on his knees, and turns a heated smile on him.“Come on over, babe.” He narrows his gaze. “Crawl.” The command practically knocks Sebastian down to his hands. He glances up through his eyelashes, seeks out that nod of approval before starting forward. Despite wanting to rush over there, Sebastian takes his time. Puts on a show. Let’s his shoulder dip and his back curve and arms move as cat-like as possible. When he reaches Chris, Chris a hand pets over his head and brings two fingers to his mouth. Sebastian immediately opens up. Suckles and laps and tries to get them even further into his mouth. “You like that, don’t you?” Chris asks. “Having something in your mouth?” Without taking his mouth away from Chris’s fingers, Sebastian peers up and nods. “You want something else to put in there?”Chris is already taking his fingers out and lowering his pants to let his own cock spring free. As soon as Sebastian sees it, he’s lunging. He can’t help it. Sucking on Chris Evans’s cock is like tasting a piece of heaven. “Fuck.” Chris’s fingers grip his hair. “Seb…” He pulls away in just a few minutes, though, even with Sebastian’s futile attempts at keeping his mouth around Chris’s cock. “One more thing to get through.”He pats his hand on the seat of the chest press and Sebastian sucks in a deep breath before climbing up there. The leather sticks a bit to his bare ass. Sebastian gets himself all ready to his presses. “Wait, wait.” Chris smirks and pulls two silk scarves out of his pockets. “Let’s get you set up, hm?”It’s a strange feeling, having his wrists bound to an exercise machine. Chris is exceptional with knots and there’s enough slack that Sebastian’s wrists aren’t pressed against the corners of the bars, but not enough that he can move them very far. Chris steps back and admires his handiwork with a nod. “Fuck, you should see yourself. Just strapped there for me. I could do anything I want, couldn’t I?”Sebastian wants to answer, but all he can manage is a nod. If he tried for words he’s not sure anything would come out but mushed up sounds that were at one time the start of thoughts. Before telling him to start, Chris gives him a few more strokes. When he does tell him to start, the game is clear. Keep doing his reps and he’ll have Chris’s hand on him. Stop in the middle of a set and Chris takes his hand away. Simple. And yet it’s the most complicated task of this whole afternoon. By the fifth rep Sebastian is tugging on his restraints, trying desperately to continue pulling his arms in. There’re tears in his eyes. He’s biting so hard on his lip that it probably should hurt but he can’t feel much of anything other than the confusing sensations running through his body. He squirms around and struggles trying to get to six and seven, his cock aching for some sort of relief. “Oh, Chris.” Sebastian whines. “Sir… I need to come…”“Not yet.” He squeezes around the base and stills his hand. “Keep it up, Seb. You can do it. Just a few more. Be a good boy.”Sebastian whimpers. A good boy. Yes. He can do that. He can be good. He needs to be good. For Chris. “Okay,” he breathes. “Yes. Yes, sir.”Sucking in another deep breath, Sebastian starts again. All the ridiculous noises he’s sure he’s making － just like Chris wanted － very worth the straining and the waiting and the ache. The delicious, tormenting ache just pooling and pooling and－“Chris!” Sebastian wails. “Oh, sir, please! Please, please!”“You wanna come, baby?” Chris asks. His voice tickling over Sebastian’s skin like soft, silky feathers. “Should I let you?”Sebastian’s holding completely still now. If he doesn’t, he might lose himself and then he won’t be as good as he can be for Chris and he just can’t let that happen. “Please, yes…” he whispers. Eyes shut tight and barely even breathing. “Please…”Chris leans in close and Sebastian can hear his fevered breathing. “When you feel me, baby. Then you go right ahead.”All Sebastian needs to do is wait a little longer. Just a little more. He can make it. His fingers claw at the bars he strapped to. His mouth hangs open. His eyes are wide as saucers.Then it happens. A splash of warmth hits his inner thigh. The world around Sebastian fades away with a burst of pure, unadulterated pleasure. Euphoria washes over him. He floats somewhere high above himself. Brought up to glistening skies by iridescent streamers where all that matters are the colors that circle around him. Bright and shimmering. Velvet to the touch. Something is making him move. He’s not entirely sure why, but it takes no effort on his part. His arms, they lower. The sticky leather behind him peels away and leaves a cool, silky feeling breezing down his back. There’s something warm around him. Soft. And hands. Touching soothingly as they caress up and down. “I love you so much.” And a voice. The only one that can pierce through Sebastian’s world of streaming, velvet colors. “You’re so fucking amazing, I don’t know what I did to deserve you.”Nothing, Sebastian wants to answer. You’re you. And I love you, too. “Hey.” Those hands by his head now. Running through sweat damp hair. “You with me, Seb?”As the world reshapes around him, Sebastian realizes that his head is in Chris’s lap. The warmth comes from a blanket and Chris’s arms that have him tucked in a secure embrace. Sebastian doesn’t open his eyes though. Not yet.“Mm-mm,” he answers. He snuggles deeper into Chris’s lap. “Not yet.” Chris chuckles and keeps petting him. “You were so good for me, Seb. I’m so proud of you. Such pretty noises you make.” Sebastian’s able to get out a snort. “For you only, sir.” “We gotta get you some water,” Chris tells him after a nose-poke. “And some food.”Rolling over, Sebastian grins and wraps Chris’s arms tighter around him. Gets no objections either and even ends up getting smothered in face kisses. “Can I ask a question, Chris?”“Always.”Sebastian sits up a little and eyes the big machine in the middle of the room with his question on his face. The source of today’s antics. Still with the scarves tied to it. Chris laughs. “One of the neighbors was getting rid of it. I thought…” “So… we’re not keeping it?”“Well.” Chris scoots him up a little more and presses a soft kiss to his lips. “I wouldn’t be too opposed to hearing all those noises again.” Cheeks filling with a blush, Sebastian buries his face in Chris’s shoulder. “You know, I have to work with Don tomorrow.” “Mhm.” Chris ruffles his hair. “Don’t worry, I’m sure that’ll be an entirely different sort of work out.” Yes, of that Sebastian’s quite sure of. Some pretty noises are for Chris’s ears only.
|
10643103
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maybe well find a brand
|
{
"Archive Warning": "No Archive Warnings Apply",
"Category": "M/M",
"Characters": null,
"Fandom": "EXO (Band)",
"Language": "English",
"Rating": "Teen And Up Audiences",
"author": "by orphan_account",
"chapters": "1/1",
"completed": "",
"published": "2017-04-16T00:00:00",
"words": "4,208",
"Additional Tags": "Supernatural Elements, Post-Break Up, Drama",
"Relationship": "Do Kyungsoo | D.O/Park Chanyeol",
"Character": null,
"Relationships": null,
"Series": null,
"Collections": null,
"Fandoms": null,
"Archive Warnings": null,
"Categories": null,
"Bookmarks": null,
"Chapters": null,
"Comments": null,
"Completed": null,
"Hits": null,
"Kudos": null,
"Published": null,
"Words": null,
"Updated": null
}
|
Kyungsoo was sat on the couch. It was late afternoon. He had earphones plugged in, and his nose was deep in a comic book. It was one of Chanyeol's favourites. The favourite volume of a favourite comic series, one that he had recommended to Kyungsoo since forever. Whatever forever meant. The corners of the pages were worn from usage. From the outdated concept people commonly called time. That was the first time Chanyeol saw this Kyungsoo. This Kyungsoo - Chanyeol preferred calling him D.O. - had the same glassy eyes, the same heart-like lips, the same voice, the same smell, the same dull sense of fashion, the same everything, even that half-exasperated look that he often had, ones that sometimes turned into a gentle smile if Chanyeol stared long enough. He was so much like Kyungsoo that Chanyeol thought he had been thrown back in time. Only, Chanyeol wasn't ever that lucky. He wasn't ever going to be the protagonist of a time machine story. He was just an ordinary student with ordinary things, like plain old time.D.O. was hope and doom combined in one. Something like what ambrosia was to a mortal. Something like the danger zone at the edge of the platform, the exhilarating thrill when one dived head first into open air. Sometimes Chanyeol wasn't sure if the guy was Kyungsoo or D.O. Reality and memories bled into each other, and it only became harder and harder to tell them apart. "What... are you doing here?" Chanyeol asked after maybe what seemed like half an hour of just staring, confused and lost. His voice was soft; he was afraid if he were any louder the image in front of him would dissipate into oblivion."I don't know," Kyungsoo said after taking off his earphones. He put down the comic book. "I've been meaning to read this for a while," he decided to say, his fingers lingering on its cover, slowly following the cursive font of the title."Because I recc'ed you it, you know, a long time ago," Chanyeol conjectured aloud. He looked at the ground, then up at Kyungsoo. "Did my mom let you in?" Chanyeol's mom had always been fond of Kyungsoo."No," Kyungsoo answered, offering nothing else. He seemed just as confused as Chanyeol."I can't imagine you doing something as romantic as climbing through the living room window, just to see me," Chanyeol tried saying something clever, only it wasn't, really, and it only left a strange kind of pain in his chest."I didn't, and you're right, I wouldn't," Kyungsoo responded, almost too bluntly. Chanyeol bit his lower lip. "Okay, but you gotta give me a hint. I can't read your mind. How did you get in? Yura would have killed you." He could imagine Yura slapping Kyungsoo and slamming the door on his face.Kyungsoo looked away, as if he was about to say something shameful. "The spare key under the pot."Chanyeol nodded. Of course. "Ah, right. Forgot about that." He scratched the back of his neck. "But that doesn't explain why you're here."Kyungsoo kept quiet, kept his gaze low. They stayed that way for a while before Chanyeol snapped."I need you to leave," he said, voice belligerent, almost mean though it was tinted with pain. "You can't just walk back in here to read a fucking comic book. My fucking comic book. Well, you know what? I won't offer you coffee, or tea, or any form of hospitality," he breathed hard, almost panting, "get out."Kyungsoo didn't stay a second more. He left, just like that, out the door. It shut behind him with an audible click. Click. Click. Click.The second visit was late at night. Chanyeol was clicking through a game on an emulator on his desktop, trying to up his chances of soloing a raid boss by upgrading the runes of his stronger units, hoping nothing would break. He eyed the NPC really hard when she said, "Oupsie daisy - I guess that fickle gem just broke!" He had his headphones on and that was why he hadn't heard Kyungsoo."Shit!" Chanyeol had practically flipped his table when he noticed Kyungsoo standing next to him, staring at his screen, muted and expressionless, the way he always would be when he watched his friends gaming. Chanyeol stood up angrily, throwing off his headphones in a way Ross Geller would have. Over dramatically. "What. The. Fuck," Chanyeol hissed, for fear of waking his mom and sister. His hands were up in the air for emphasis. "Rune upgrade failing too many times in a row, I'm guessing?" Kyungsoo deadpanned. "Or did something break?"Chanyeol widened his eyes. What?"Sorry, I've never been too great at understanding games," Kyungsoo explained.Chanyeol shook his head. "No, no, I mean, what the fuck, Kyungsoo?"Kyungsoo bit his lower lip. "Uh. Um, surprise visit?" he offered.Chanyeol blinked. "But you hate game nights?" Chanyeol shook his head. What was he talking about? That was not the point. "I didn't like them because I wasn't good at any," Kyungsoo said. "I still suck at them. But hey, maybe I could at least try.""No, Kyungsoo, no, no no no no no. That's not my point--""But you just asked--""I meant to say, how and why the fuck are you here?" Chanyeol rephrased. He then looked at his digital clock on the other side of the room. The red numbers read three hours past midnight. Fucking third hour of the day. "It's 3AM, Jesus.""Ungodly hour for a game, I have to say," Kyungsoo commented."Ungodly hour for an impromptu visit, you mean?" Chanyeol retorted. "You're not welcome here either, just in case you forgot that?"Kyungsoo didn't say anything, but there was something like hurt in his eyes. Something similar but not entirely the same. Chanyeol exhaled. It helped with calming his nerves sometimes, but this was not one of those times. He closed his eyes, squeezed tight. He heard a door open and close. He opened his eyes, and Kyungsoo was gone. The third time was not going to happen, Chanyeol told himself. Chanyeol also told himself every morning ever since that night, that he had to go and take the key from under the pot and confiscate it, so to speak. But every time he had finished his morning routine and was heading out to work, he either forgot or decided not to take it.Whenever he decided not to, he would end up wasting his whole day doing nothing productive. He would just daydream, wondering why he hadn't taken the key. If he had to say what he missed the most about Kyungsoo it would be the soft and long kisses, the ones that made his knees give in, that made him weak in the gut but spiritually strong. But then, it was like missing all the non-existent I-love-you's he wanted to hear from Kyungsoo. It hurt just thinking about them. Chanyeol should really get over them, the kisses and the I-love-you's. They didn't hurt in any sort of good way. Chanyeol wanted to sink his own head into the water-filled sink and stay there in the dark washroom, trying hard to forget. Whether it was to forget how to breathe or to forget Kyungsoo it didn't matter anymore. Either or. It was fine.Except it wasn't like either would ever happen. He never quite liked water. He would just come up again and gasp for good old air. The third time was at a bookstore. The Kyungsoo Chanyeol knew never really liked bookstores. Kyungsoo hardly ever went to one... but he was standing there, reading a book. He seemed so out of place. This time it was not a comic book though, it was some sort of textbook on the theory of objectivity. He did not seem to have noticed Chanyeol even though the tall guy was sticking out like a sore thumb and the shop was relatively uncrowded.Chanyeol decided not to approach him. He quickly paid for his monthly magazine and left with only the sound of wooden wind chimes dangling at the door. The fourth time was in his own bed. Chanyeol woke up and Kyungsoo was curled up, sleeping next time, facing him. It was so unreal. Kyungsoo never slept facing Chanyeol, at least, not in a long time.His face was serene, gentle, almost innocent, almost ignorant, almost ridiculously unsuspecting.Chanyeol didn't understand. He was trying to put two and two together in his brain but he didn't have any twos and he didn't have any conclusion; he didn't have a fucking clue either.Kyungsoo couldn't just walk in like this, walk back into his life like it had only been a matter of reversing time, only a matter of doing what Chanyeol had always wanted him to do. Out of spite-- no, it was out of something Chanyeol couldn't quite word -- he shoved Kyungsoo off the bed. The other woke with a small yelp, but before he could get up, Chanyeol stormed out of his own bedroom, slamming the door even though it was harder to do so since the door was being slammed from outside the room. Kisses went a little like this. Chanyeol would press his lips against Kyungsoo's and they would push and push, their noses bumping, always in the way. Their hands would be somewhere on the other's neck, hair, cheeks. Their eyes would be closed for added effect. Added effect equating to an exhilarating adrenaline similar to the feeling one would get from looking up at a quiet yet very starry night sky. Chanyeol called this Kyungsoo D.O., firstly because he wanted to differentiate between the two entities. Secondly, he wanted something that sounded respectful. D.O. sounded like a prayer if one said it soft enough. Chanyeol had learned that the Spanish word for god was something similar to it, maybe one letter sound off, but close. Chanyeol did not necessarily believe in god, but it did the thing. D.O., it was like a secret chord that only god could hear. It took Chanyeol five times to realise that D.O. was not Kyungsoo. Or five point five times, but he liked to round down numbers. The fifth time was when Chanyeol was smoking outside on the balcony. The cold night breeze had not bothered him. Sometimes he wondered if he wanted the fresh air or the poisonous smoulder whenever he stepped out on his balcony. He looked at his pack of cigs and wondered if quitting would be hard.Who was he kidding.He exhaled the smoke slowly through his mouth, and when it dissipated, he saw Kyungsoo sitting at the edge of the sidewalk, his back to Chanyeol.Chanyeol didn't call out. His heart just stopped altogether and he did not know how to reboot it. All he could do was blame it all on the smoke, blame it all on a bad night of failed rune upgrades and toothpick damage on raid bosses and losing his top 10 PVP rank and E luck yolo rolls, on him being a wuss and a loser who couldn't get over something as measly as a breakup. The next morning, he did not forget to check under the pot. Ha, he thought when he was reaching for it. This would put an end to everything. The potted plant was lifted from its spot of half sunshine half shadow.Only, there was no key.For the whole day Chanyeol felt uneasy. Surely Kyungsoo was not the type to just steal the key. Surely Chanyeol hadn't dated someone that creepy.But when he came back home from work he checked again and yeah, the key still wasn't there. Kyungsoo was the one who had crossed the line between childhood friend and best friend forever. He was also the one who had crossed the more dangerous line between bff and boyfriends. He was the one who leaned in and kissed Chanyeol that night after the graduation ceremony. Chanyeol could remember vividly how Kyungsoo's mortarboard fell off his head when he had flung himself on Chanyeol, telling him, "I'm sorry I'm sorry I'm sorry I'm sorry I'm--," after one of the best kisses of Chanyeol's otherwise ordinary life. It hurt it hurt it hurt it hurt it hurt, Chanyeol wanted to scream. Five point five. "Mom, I just want you to know that the backup key's gone.""What backup key?""The one under the pot?"His mom eyed him curiously. "Chanyeol, I gave that backup key to uncle Joonmyeon, remember? About half a year ago?" Chanyeol practically summoned the sixth time.Chanyeol had him pinned down to the wooden tile floor of his bedroom. D.O. didn't struggle, didn't try to escape, but he was breathing hard, like an animal that knew it was trapped and knew it had no chances of escaping."Who are you," Chanyeol practically growled. He raised a fist threateningly. D.O.'s eyes followed it. "Whoever you want me to be," D.O. answered. They stayed still and silent for a while. The tension was almost tangible.Chanyeol didn't loosen his grip. D.O.'s reply was far from anything he wanted as an answer. It was not even remotely close."Stop talking to me in riddles," Chanyeol said.D.O. did not look at Chanyeol. He kept his eyes on the fist. He then closed them. "I'm..."Chanyeol waited it out as patiently as he could."A figment of your imagination," D.O. finished. "I think that's what you could call me. But I rather think of myself as the embodiment of your love for Kyungsoo. It's nicer. It's heart-warming, even though I probably don't have a heart of my own."It took all the willpower for Chanyeol to stay still and take it all in. Masticate, ruminate and digest every little word D.O. had just said. Before he knew it, he started shedding silent tears. They fell on D.O's face, and D.O. looked away, guilty and apologetic.But after a whole minute of this intense feeling of nostalgia and anger mixed with confusion, Chanyeol couldn't keep it in anymore. He let go, grabbed chunks of his hair and screamed as hard as he could. No one could see D.O.Only Chanyeol could. It made sense, D.O. was a figment of his imagination after all. D.O. visited him, and since Chanyeol did not want to explain to anyone again about why he had screamed the other day ("No I swear it was a fucking huge spider don't pretend you aren't scared of spiders Park Yura") he didn't cause any other uproar about D.O.'s subsequent visits. Chanyeol pretended to get used to the visits."I like this comic artist's style. Love how he plays with the thickness of his lines. I once heard that the secret to drawing is in sketching C's and S's. I think I can actually see it in his style. Here, see? An S… a C, and S and another S."It was a secret that Chanyeol knew. It wasn't anything new. In fact, it was actually his opinion about the artist's style. But at this point he could only agree and nod, not paying too much attention. D.O. smiled briefly."I'm trying to make this work," D.O. said, a little too earnestly, the way that would usually get to Chanyeol even if he were zero percent wrong. Minus a hundred percent wrong.Chanyeol shrugged it off, patted D.O. on the back, but D.O.'s words were already affecting him. Clawing at him, digging deep to touch a sensitive spot."Why do I need you?" Chanyeol murmured, later that same night.D.O. looked away, out the window. "Because I could have been the one, yet I left." His words were whispered, but they were like droplets of acid to Chanyeol. Friday was a game night, and D.O. stayed over. Chanyeol double clicked on the emulator and opened up Discord and Twitch, seeing if anyone had put up a strategy for the current event boss. D.O. just sat next to him, watching him work and coordinate attacks with his guild mates. DPS was the way to go. Build your units with atk-atk-crit. Bring all the def debuffers in the first wave, and then burst, burst, burst. D.O. was learning these terms slowly. Surely, given he was in fact just a projection of what Chanyeol knows already, he knew the lingo, but still he tried learning them, pretended he didn't know, in order to keep in character."HP becomes invaluable with def buffs," Chanyeol spoke into his mic, talking to a newbie who had just joined the guild and rolled a tanky unit with a def up passive, and wasn't sure if that was so great.D.O. rested his head on Chanyeol's shoulder. "It's better than HP boost passive on a tank?" he asked casually."Definitely, as long as the active doesn't rely on higher max HP," Chanyeol answered without thinking. "Not that the unit would be bad because of a def up passive. It depends on its role in your team anyways.""I like the design to that unit," Kyungsoo pointed at the screen."Yeah," Chanyeol breathed deeply. "Me, too."D.O. - not Kyungsoo - was pointing at the screen, Chanyeol corrected himself. He closed his eyes. "Did I see you at the bookstore, you know, a couple of weeks ago?" Chanyeol asked one day.D.O. looked at him wordlessly, eyes misty.Chanyeol did not know if he really wanted to know. "Are there places where... you can't possibly appear?" D.O. brought Chanyeol to the bookstore. But he didn't go in."I can't be somewhere you've never seen me in before."D.O. pointed at the bookstore for emphasis. "You've never seen me in there before, not before a couple of weeks ago, not before you saw Kyungsoo. So before that day, you couldn't have possibly seen me. But if I step in right now, you'd be able to see me."Chanyeol mulled over this but soon forgot after D.O. stepped in and looked at the New Arrivals section. "I can touch you. How is it that I can touch an illusion?" They were sat on Chanyeol's bed."Illusions can really mess with you," Kyungsoo said, almost cheekily. "I was convinced it was the other way around," Chanyeol replied. "Okay, but if you're the embodiment of my love for Kyungsoo, then like, if I kissed you what would happen?""It'll be a memory you don't want to remember," D.O. answered softly. "Nothing else." He kissed D.O. anyways. Long and soft, just like he remembered. D.O. breathed hard. Their hands were all over the place. Chanyeol sunk his nose into the nook of the other's neck. He breathed and breathed and remembered Kyungsoo's lavender laundry detergent and lemongrass shampoo.D.O. pushed Chanyeol off abruptly, his face completely flushed (but with embarrassment or anger, Chanyeol couldn't tell) and ran out of the room like a bat out of hell, like a fish out of water, like a gamer who'd suddenly lost his game. "What if I fell in love with you, D.O.?" Chanyeol asked."I'd be your doom," D.O. said.They stayed quiet for a while."Promise me you won't fall in love with me," D.O. whispered, so softly Chanyeol almost missed it. D.O. didn't visit for a while after that. Chanyeol did not know if it was for the better. What he did know was that Do fucking Kyungsoo left him twice now, and it hurt like a bitch. It didn't matter if one of them was a figment of imagination or not. It just didn't matter anymore. It took months to recover. Chanyeol had gotten some therapy. He did not feel like he was recovering though. He was just getting better at lying to himself. If D.O. was gone, did that mean his love for Kyungsoo was also gone? Because that would be great. He would love that. He would really love that. He could go back to being an ordinary guy living an ordinary life without having a care in the world about fancy concepts like love and time and forever. D.O. had only taken a "break" away. He hadn't been gone completely. But this time he was back to say goodbye.Chanyeol was smoking on the balcony and D.O. was suddenly right below it. It would have been romantic if D.O. weren't a figment of Chanyeol's imagination."D.O.?""Yeah."Chanyeol inhaled and then exhaled, slow and steady, his eyes resting on D.O. with sombre indifference."You've been gone like, what? Six months? I thought you were gone for sure. Well, you wouldn't have been out of character," Chanyeol said, trying to sound nonchalant."I don't have a will of my own," D.O. replied flatly.Chanyeol quirked his eyebrow."I only appear when you want me to, and I can't just stay away even if I wanted to," D.O. said. "Although yes, I did try hard to stay away."Chanyeol laughed bitterly. "Am I that horrible to be with? What did Kyungsoo say back then… that my love was, hmm, too smothering? Is that what you think too? Because that's fine. Really." He tapped his cig against the railing. "No, Chanyeol," D.O. said. "Your love is too smothering for yourself, Chanyeol, not for Kyungsoo."The smoker narrowed his eyes. "What do you mean?""I am your love. I personify it, whatever you call this," D.O. said, hands motioning at himself. "I think I'm not healthy for you. You know I'm not healthy for you."Chanyeol inhaled sharply."I love you too, you know," D.O. murmured."But you're just," Chanyeol started. "But you're… just saying what I want to hear the real Kyungsoo say.""Exactly," D.O. said. "I don't have a will of my own. I'm not my own being, even if I were convinced that I am in love with you.""This is so fucked up," Chanyeol said, after a long pause.D.O. sighed. "Yeah. It was nice meeting you. I love you… a lot. I personally think Kyungsoo did too. But my personal thoughts probably don't mean anything.""You're out of character," Chanyeol said."This'll be the only time it happens," D.O. said before he stepped off the pavement. "But who am I kidding? Anyway, goodbye, Chanyeol."And he left for good. Chanyeol lived a little better after that. He didn't feel so strung up or upset despite that being one of the saddest goodbyes he'd ever heard. Somehow, he felt strangely relieved. The cliché was that the weight was lifted from his shoulders. He was able to move on in life. He dedicated less and less time on binge gaming in the middle of the night, so he could sleep more and better. He would put a little more effort every day into work, and help his mom around with her garden, or help Yura with her work. He would spend some time with his friends (Baekhyun and Jongdae), and they would hang around at least once every week, grab a beer and talk about old times. He even quit smoking. Chanyeol was back to reality, back on the map. And everything was falling back into place, piece by piece. One day, months after D.O., an idea struck him. Not an idea per se, more like some sort of force that he could not understand, pushing him to just get up and go. He wasn't sure if it was a sign of any of his feelings for Kyungsoo re-emerging from dead waters, or something else altogether, but he had a rather good feeling about it. He just went with the flow. He stood up. He was at work but he didn't… really care. He grabbed his jacket that was on the back of his chair, he closed the lid of his laptop and was about to grab his bag but he thought "really?" and just left without doing anything else, without minding all the heads that turned to him, without caring about all the "where are you going"s from his colleagues and superiors."Where are you going?" Even life started asking him questions.He was running down the busy streets, wading through the crowd like he was swimming in a swamp. He didn't mind. The harder he pushed the more real this whole idea felt.He ran harder and harder until he reached the bookstore. The bookstore where he had last seen Kyungsoo. The one where D.O. had stood, hesitating, helpless, afraid, before he had stepped in.And Kyungsoo was there. There he was. Standing close to the windows, in a light jacket, with his perfect hair wavy and black. He was standing close enough for Chanyeol to see him, close enough for Chanyeol to see him reading Chanyeol's favourite comic book. His favourite volume of his favourite comic series, the one that he had recommended to Kyungsoo since forever.
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10648662
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The Cat Chronicles
|
{
"Archive Warning": "Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings",
"Category": null,
"Characters": "Tobi (Naruto), Zetsu (Naruto), Pain (Naruto), Konan (Naruto), Deidara (Naruto), Sasori (Naruto), Hidan (Naruto), Kakuzu (Naruto), Uchiha Itachi, Hoshigaki Kisame",
"Fandom": "Naruto",
"Language": "English",
"Rating": "Teen And Up Audiences",
"author": "by Kraken_of_the_Deep",
"chapters": "2/?",
"completed": "",
"published": "2017-04-17T00:00:00",
"words": "1,335",
"Additional Tags": "Original Character(s), The Akatsuki - Freeform, Disabled Character, Cats, Mystery, Adventure, Possible Relationships - Freeform, Implied Relationships, Past Character Death, Mysterious Events",
"Relationship": null,
"Character": null,
"Relationships": "Konan/Pain (Naruto), Hoshigaki Kisame/Uchiha Itachi",
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Intro
Have you ever gotten to the point that nothing could surprise you anymore…I have- Here, I will tell you how this came to be…It all started with a cat, a box, and a wave. On their own, pretty normal things, but together….that's a different story.Now, Here is a little background for all of you:My name is Torrian, or Tor. I am a 21 year-old guy, kinda small, standing at 5'5" and weighing about 135 pounds. I have reddish brown hair, green eyes, and a lot of freckles.My family consists of my step-dad, my older sister Ansley, and my little twin brothers Gavin and Quinn. We are also the proud servants of our two lovely cats, Honey and Ginger.Our mother disappeared one day four years ago during her almost daily beach jog. No one knows what happened to her, she just up and vanished. Enough about me, you will definitely learn more later, here is the incident that started it all-I was minding my own business, walking along the beach, when I heard a surprising sound. A cat's meow. Now as a cat lover and owner I can tell the difference between a happy meow and a distressed one, or at least I like to think I can.Anyway, the meow I heard was panicked, so I rushed in the direction I thought it was coming from. Upon arrival, I saw something I will never forget. A black cat crying out on the sand, while a little ways away a box was floating a couple feet from shore.The poor cat was drenched, and looked utterly pitiful. Suddenly, I heard more panicked whimpers, getting farther away! That is when I realized that the box, which was quickly being washed out to sea, contained more kitties!What was a guy to do? Jump in and be a hero, of course!Little did I know this act of heroism would change my life completely…
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
Chapter 1
So here I was, standing by the ocean. Watching a cat crying for it's friends that were swiftly washing out to sea. Upon seeing a wave forming, I immediately jumped in.Now, this was probably not the best idea, for you see, when I was ten years old, there was an accident. I don't remember it so well, but my biological father died from it and I was in a coma for two years, after which I slowly healed, though I lost my right foot up to mid-shin, as well as some movement in my right arm. I wore a prosthetic foot due to this.But I HAD to save those kittens!I reached the box after some struggling, thankfully the box had not drifted too far out yet. Grabbing a corner I pulled it back to shore.After catching my breath, I scooped up the black kitten, put him in the box with his friends, and jogged home as fast as I could. Thankfully, we lived right on the beach, and I was only a house away. Slamming open the door, I hurried to my room. Placing the box on my bed, I grabbed a few towels and blankets and started the process of drying the poor creatures.The first Kitten I grabbed was the little black one that had somehow managed to escape the doomed box. He was a little scrawny thing, pitch black, with a startling orange streak across his face. Picking him up, I found my assumption of his being male correct. Quickly, I toweled him off, making his fur fluff up. Snickering, he looked so funny, just like a little black pom-pom."Oy, settle down." I reprimanded him, as he had decided he had had enough of my manhandling, and decided to start meowing and making this silly little chirping noise. Tapping him on the nose, I set him down on the bed. Turning to the box, I decided to take all of the cats out. Slowly tipping it over I waited for them to come out. After what seemed like hours, the remaining kittens were out of the box, huddled up together."Come on don't be like that. I won't bite." Trying to reassure the poor things, I pointed to their little friend. "See, he's fine. Let me dry you guys off, and then we can get some food into you. All of you look like you need it."They all turned to their friend, who was on his back pawing at the air."Okaaay...Never mind. Still, lets get you warmed up" Odd cat that one..."So," Grabbing a towel, I held it up, "Who will be first?"I sat back a little ways to observe my new charges.The ten cats looked neglected. While they did not seem to be completely feral, they appeared to not be used to human contact. The two largest cats, were also some of the more odd looking of the bunch.One was a large fluffy cat, appeared to be at least part Maine Coon. He was a dark tabby, but his stripes were oddly placed. Instead of the usual tabby pattern, his markings were randomly placed and stood out from his coat. His eyes were an eerie green, and seemed to glow.Creeped out, I turned my attention to the other large cat. He appeared to be a Chartreux, which are known for their blue/grey toned coats. His was a dusky blue, with a few darker streaks on either side of his neck.What was odd, and somewhat startling, were his teeth. Cats have sharp teeth, this I know believe me, but this particular cat's teeth were shockingly sharp. They looked like little knives!"Hissssss!"Having been engrossed in the sharp teeth, I had stopped paying attention to the others. Apparently that was a mistake.One of the smaller cats, an albino by the looks of it, had decided to jump on the eerie Maine Coon. The larger cat did not like this, as he had bitten at the albino's ear, leaving little pinpricks of blood. Instead of being discouraged, the miscreant had decided to disregard the warning.Jumping on the angry giant, he started clawing at his back. However, before I could intervene, another one of the cats became involved. This one was a thin orange cream colored cat, with darker orange spots on his face. He moved from his place beside another blue colored cat, who was significantly smaller than the one previously mentioned , and swatted the albino on the head."Mrowr" He reprimanded his violent companion. Immediately, the white-coated cat snarled at the other, but made no more violent movements. A couple of the other cats seemed to start snickering, but it had to be my imagination."Okay, enough playtime. Time to dry you kitties." I snatched up the fussy albino, and vigorously rubbed him down. He struggled with me the entire time . Eventually,I had him dry to my standards, and put him down. He made a funny looking face, cheeks puffed up, ears pulled back, and fur fluffed up. I couldn't help it, I laughed."Look at you, all fuzzy!" Teasingly, I booped him on the nose.Finally, after another few minutes, I had the rest of them dry.Looking at the four other cats. An average, medium-coated orange cream cat. He had significantly longer fur than his cream colored companion, the longest tuft covered his one of his eyes.Next was a bored looking cinnamon cat, he had a couple of tabby stripes along his tail, and on his forehead.Curled up next to the Chartreux, was a black cat. He was larger than the black kitten, who I think was the runt, and had dark eyes. He appeared to have vision problems, as he kept squinting up at me.The last cat was an odd one. Black and white bicolor, but oddly placed. Black on one side, white on the other, and amber eyes.
"Time to name all you fur balls!"
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10616520
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Message in a bottle
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{
"Archive Warning": "Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings",
"Category": null,
"Characters": "Alexander Hamilton, Thomas Jefferson, George Washington, James Madison",
"Fandom": "Hamilton - Miranda",
"Language": "English",
"Rating": "Not Rated",
"author": "by BlazingStarInInkyBlackness",
"chapters": "2/2",
"completed": "2017-04-15",
"published": "2017-04-13T00:00:00",
"words": "11,791",
"Additional Tags": "Torture, Recovery, Angst, Hamilton is a little shit, Alcohol Abuse/Alcoholism, Electrocution, Gunshot Wounds, Self-Destruction",
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|
Hamilton was woken by Jefferson’s voice. That was never a good sign.“Hamilton!” Jefferson hissed. Hamilton kept his eyes closed, more from stubbornness than anything else. Then he felt a sharp kick in his leg. His eyes opened and he glared at Jefferson.“What the fuck!”“Shh.” Jefferson whispered.“Don’t you dare shush me! If you don’t-”“We’re not safe.”That made Hamilton shut up. He glanced around and frowned.“Where are we?” The last thing he remembered was the truck. He and Jefferson had been sniping at each other as the soldiers who were protecting them glanced at each other in pain.“If I knew that I wouldn’t have fucking woken you up.”“You must-” Hamilton fell silent as he saw Jefferson move slightly. His wrists were encased in silver handcuffs. There were also handcuffs attached to his ankles. Hamilton looked down at himself and gaped as he saw he was in the same position as Jefferson.“Have you really only just noticed that?”“What’s going on?”“At a guess? I’d say we got kidnapped.”“But why-” Hamilton paused and Jefferson nodded. “We’re political prisoners.”“Let’s hope that’s all we turn into.”After that they lapsed into silence. Hamilton took stock of the scene again. The room was cold, cold enough to make him uncomfortable but then again all cold did. The floor was concrete as were the walls.“Where do you think we are?” Hamilton asked quietly. Jefferson shrugged.“Could be anywhere. I don’t know how long we were out for.”“Why’d they keep us together?” Jefferson paused as if he knew the answer but didn’t want to say it.“Spit it out Jefferson. If I spent this long listening to your dumb ways about how to run government I can cope with hits.”“Leverage. Against each other.”“You mean torture.”“Yes.”“Well,” Hamilton licked his lips, “fuck.”“Yeah.” They had no idea how much later it was when more people appeared in the room. Hamilton had just about nodded off to sleep which would be a miracle in any other circumstance. Jefferson had been nodding off as well until the door opened.Three men walked into the room. Each of them were taller than Hamilton and two were taller than Jefferson. Jefferson decided to dub the other one Short. Hamilton was small even if he tried to deny it.“Which of you is Alexander Hamilton?”Jefferson couldn’t quite place the accent. It was thick but it sounded as if it was mangled, as if Short had spent time in multiple countries.“I am.” Hamilton stated. He stared up at them. Short walked over to him slowly. Hamilton continued to stare with that same steely gaze. Suddenly Short lunged forwards and grabbed Hamilton by the throat. Hamilton began to growl but couldn’t do anything with his hands and feet in cuffs.“Alexander Hamilton you made these problems.” Short dropped Hamilton who continued to glare up. “You will both pay.”“What did we do?” Hamilton asked.“You took funds from my people to finance your pockets. America has ruled my country for too long. You two will become our voices.”“You’re mad if you think I’m going to help you.”The slap rang out loudly in the cold room. Hamilton whipped his head back around immediately and continued to glare at the man.“I didn’t say anything about you having a choice.” When the two men were alone Jefferson laid his head back against the wall.“Why did you fight back?”“It’s better this way.”“What does that mean?”“Doesn’t matter.” Hamilton curled in on himself slightly as he began to shake. Jefferson watched as Hamilton slowly slipped off to sleep. The next time the men came back there were four of them. Jefferson noticed that Short was back. He decided that now was as good as any to decide on a name for them. Short seemed to be more of a muscle. There was a leader, might as well go for that as a name. He hadn’t said anything, just watched everything.Jefferson decided that the other two would be called Muscles 1 and Muscles 2. There didn’t seem to be much difference between them.Leader stood in the doorway and looked at them.“Hamilton?”“Here.” Hamilton raised a hand as far as he could with the chains as if he was calling registration. Jefferson shot him a look and Hamilton ignored it.“Do you think this is a joke?”“I think you’re a joke if you think you’re getting out of here.”“And why do you think that?”“Because you’ve got the Secretary of the Treasury in here and the US government doesn’t like when their toys are taken away.”“I have more than that.”“Him?” Hamilton snorted. “Sure. Whatever.”“Boys,” Leader inclined his head to Hamilton who set his features into a mask, “get him ready.”“Ready for what?” Jefferson asked as Muscles 1 and 2 approached. Hamilton stared up at them as they approached.Jefferson’s question was answered when one of them punched Hamilton in the face. Hamilton’s head dropped at the suddenness of the blow. He didn’t have enough time to recover from the first blow before one of them grabbed his hair and pushed his head up. Hamilton was still glaring as he was punched in the face again.“Get off him!” Jefferson shouted. Leader glanced at him but as he did, Hamilton spat. It landed in one of the Muscles’ eyes and he grunted as he wiped it off.“You’re scum.” Hamilton’s voice was nasal and thick as blood began to pour down his face. For his words he got a kick to the gut which made him lean forwards as much as the chains would allow him. Muscles 2 kicked Hamilton in the face once more before they pulled back.Hamilton’s face was a bloody mess. One of his eyes were puffed and his nose looked crooked. Leader walked over to him and grabbed his chin. He stared at Hamilton for a long moment before he nodded.“Get him up.”Hamilton fought against the grips of Muscles 1 and 2 but he couldn’t do anything to stop them from dragging him upright. Jefferson was screaming at them in the background but that also did nothing.Hamilton was hauled up before being shoved into a chair at the other end of the room. His feet and arms were tied to the chair despite how much he struggled against them. Leader stared at him for a moment before handing him a newspaper. Jefferson squinted at it to see that it was the day after what he remembered.It was a hostage picture.Just as Jefferson realised it Hamilton was punched in the face again which scattered blood across the paper. The picture was taken almost instantly and then Hamilton was led back to his chains. He nearly fell forwards as he was set down. Muscle 1 snorted at that and kicked Hamilton in the side.“Get away from him!” Jefferson snarled. Hamilton immediately went limp as he was chained up again. His head fell to his chest as if his neck had given out on him. Leader stared at him for a long moment before he turned on his heel and left.“Hamilton. Hamilton!” Jefferson tried to move forwards but his chains hampered it. “Talk to me!” He couldn’t bare it if Hamilton was gone, if he was alone in the cell. “Talk to me!”“Never wanted to talk before.” “Wh-” Jefferson stuttered as Hamilton lifted his head. He was grinning despite the blood covering his face. “What the fuck Hamilton?”“I was in the military, remember? I went through torture lessons.”“So what? You decided to just let them beat you to shit?”“I can handle this.” Hamilton coughed after he said that and Jefferson saw blood land on the floor. “Don’t get in the way, okay?”“What?”“Next time they come in, don’t bring attention to you.”“Are you honestly telling me to let them torture you?”“I’m telling you to not let them torture you.”“You’re an idiot if you think-”“I know my limits Jefferson. You don’t know yours.” Hamilton’s voice was hard.“I can deal with pain.”“With how much? How long would it be until you told them something they wanted to know? Everyone has a limit. They just need to be hurt enough.”“Well you sound optimistic.” Jefferson sneered out.“It’s not that I don’t trust you. I don’t know you well enough. I know when I’m about to break and I know how to make sure I don’t break.”“This is insane.”“This is war. Stay out of it, alright? If they hit me, if they hurt me in any way, you do nothing, got it?”“I-”“You’re not trained for this Jefferson.” Hamilton’s voice was hard. “You have weaknesses that you don’t even know yet.”“And you don’t?”“I know my weaknesses. I also know that they’re safe in America.”“And only your friends will make you give it all up?”“No. But I know Washington’ll get us out of here before that becomes a problem.” Hamilton stared at Jefferson as if begging him to believe. Jefferson stared at him for a moment before he sighed.“I hope you know what you’re doing.”Hamilton lay back against the wall. He really hoped he did as well. The worst bit about being in the room was the boredom. They weren’t exactly known for discussion (that didn’t turn into shouts) and the knowledge of what was outside didn’t help.“They’re not going to answer a hostage report.” Hamilton piped up. It wasn’t a question, he’d seen this happen enough times.“No.”“Washington is safe. If he wasn’t then they wouldn’t bother with us.”“Probably.”“He could mobilise the military. He’d just need to figure out where we are.”“And if we’re worth it.”The two lapsed into silence again.“Do you think we’ll get out?” Hamilton asked softly.“Yes.” Jefferson’s voice was strong and sure. It left no space for fear. Hamilton smiled softly at that. When the men walked back in Hamilton sat up. Muscles 2 (or was it 1?) was missing but Muscles 1 was holding the camera again. Jefferson frowned at that. Did they want a picture of him?“Cut him loose.” Leader gestured to Jefferson. Hamilton glanced at him in fear but Jefferson just shook his head. Jefferson was hauled to his feet and he stared at the men around him. Leader walked up to him and gripped his chin. Jefferson fought internally against shrugging the man off.“Thomas Jefferson. A direct descendant of the founding father.”“Cut from the same fucking cloth.” Hamilton grumbled, loud enough for everyone in the room to hear it. Muscles 1 growled at him but Hamilton just glared up.“I’ve seen some of your speeches.” Leader continued as if nothing had happened. “Talking about how America needs to weaken itself to stay strong.”“I support power to the people. Not beaurocrats in Washington.”“Yeah cause you’ve never benefited off that.”“You’d do well to keep quiet.” Leader said to Hamilton, barely looking at him.“You’d do well to not kidnap people.”Leader looked away from Jefferson, back to Hamilton. Jefferson watched the proceedings with a frown. Hamilton was doing this on purpose, was trying to make the man notice him instead of Jefferson.“And why shouldn’t I?”“The law doesn’t quite to agree with you.”“We make our own laws here.”“Well that’s going to work great for you in international court. I’d expect-” Hamilton broke off as Leader kicked him in the stomach. Hamilton doubled over and wheezed for breath.“I’m tired of his talking. Gag him.”“You’re an idiot if you think Washington won’t do anything about this. You-” Hamilton was cut off again as Muscles 1 grabbed his chin and forced his mouth open. Hamilton fought against it until the man slapped him. Hamilton was dazed for a moment, long enough for the man to shove a bundle of cloth into his mouth.In lieu of shouting Hamilton just glared daggers at Leader.“Now then,” Leader turned back to Jefferson, “you really believe in power to the people?”“I believe that our federal government is too big and that every time a Republican attempts to ease the burden we are made to be the enemies of everything. I think that the government should use less of our money and allow the states to control it instead.”“You believe a lot of things.”“I am a politician.”“Yes, you are.” Leader stared at Jefferson for a moment before he handed Jefferson something. Jefferson stared down at his hands to see a cereal bar. He frowned at the man who just smiled. “I suggest you eat it before we tie you up again.” Jefferson glanced to Hamilton and began to eat the bar. It wasn’t much, not enough to stave off the hunger, but it was something at least.Jefferson was then led back to his chains and they were secured. Hamilton continued to glare up at the men as Leader walked over to him.“I do hate to do this but we need something from you.”Jefferson could almost hear Hamilton’s response, something filled with expletives and anger. The gag in his mouth meant that nothing got out. Leader gestured to Hamilton and both Muscles 1 and Short walked over to him. Hamilton fought as they pulled him upright. They led him to the chair and tied him down again.Even when he was tied Hamilton didn’t stop fighting. Leader walked over to him and scoffed.“This is Washington’s right hand man? I’ve heard a lot about you Alexander Hamilton. A fascinating life.” Hamilton stilled at that before he glanced at Jefferson. “Bastard born then orphaned shortly afterwards. Orphaned again when your cousin killed himself. Moved to America, joined the army a year early and made your way up the ranks. Made it to Treasury Secretary somehow. And yet you still oppose immigration.” Leader slowly pulled the gag from Hamilton’s mouth.“Of course I fucking oppose immigration! I have never fucking opposed immigrants! I oppose the idea that immigration is what we need to cure when what we need to do is to fix the countries the immigrants come from so they don’t have to run for their lives from warlords and pieces of shit like you!” Hamilton was slapped across the face and he did nothing other than glare up at Leader.“You seem to imagine that what you have done is right. What will your legacy be Hamilton?”Hamilton didn’t have an answer for that. He just continued to glare at the man. Leader nodded slowly before he glanced up at Muscles 1.“Get it.”“Wow. Well that’s fucking sinister. Where’d you get your-” Hamilton was punched this time, a hard fist connecting with his gut. He doubled over and Jefferson wanted to shout at him to shut up, to have an ounce of self-preservation.“A hurricane is quite something to live through.”“I fucking noticed.” Hamilton got another punch to the gut for that. Muscles 1 brought in a bucket of water and something under a blanket. Hamilton stared at it warily.“I read what you wrote about it. Quite poetic. You talked a lot about the cold.” With that Leader put a hand on Hamilton’s collar. Hamilton glared at him. Leader smiled before ripping the shirt, pushing all of the buttons off. Hamilton gasped as his chest was suddenly revealed to the cold air.“If you wanted me to strip could have just asked.” Hamilton was suddenly soaked as Muscles 1 poured the bucket of water of him. Jefferson could see the ice cubes inside. Hamilton choked for a moment on the cold and he started shaking. Jefferson watched him with a nervous expression. Hamilton had never been good with the cold, would always complain when the temperature dropped.Hamilton’s hair was glued to his face and he was struggling again, this time to shift the frozen water from his lap. Leader ignored him as he walked to the blanket. Jefferson couldn’t quite see what it was but Hamilton could. He froze and took a deep breath.By the time Leader turned back Hamilton’s face was blank. Leader was holding two sticks of metal that connected to a big box. Jefferson tried to see what it was but didn’t have time before a switch was flipped, the metal was pressed to Hamilton’s chest and then he was screaming.Jefferson flinched at the sound. He’d never heard Hamilton raise his voice for anything other than their arguments.When Hamilton’s screaming died down he was slumped in the chair, breathing heavily.“Are you ready to talk?”“You haven’t fucking asked anything yet.” Hamilton hissed out.“Give me the details of the aircraft carriers near our waters.”“Fuck you.” Hamilton spat out. The next second he was screaming again. This time it felt like it went on for a lifetime.“Stop it!” Jefferson cried out. Leader pulled back and turned to him. Hamilton shook his head.“Would you like to swap seats?”“Jefferson’s never-” Hamilton was cut off as the metal was pressed back to him. He whimpered as he bit down on his lip. Blood began to trickle down his chin.“We don’t know any of that. We’re the Secretaries. We’re not-”Hamilton started to scream again. Jefferson broke off.“Don’t lie to me Jefferson.”“He can’t do anything else.” Hamilton spat out along with a mouthful of blood. Jefferson stared at it in horror. Leader stepped towards the box which Jefferson now realised was a car battery. He turned a dial and fear flickered over Hamilton’s face.“I’m going to ask you one more time.”“Fuck you.”Hamilton passed out to the sound of his own screams. “Alexander!” Jefferson hissed, kicking at Hamilton’s leg. Hamilton slowly opened his eyes. “Alexander!”“Wha-” Hamilton frowned as he saw Jefferson. He actually looked worried.“You passed out.”“From wha-?”“From them electrocuting you!”“Oh yeah.” Hamilton frowned and looked down at his chest. There were several ugly burn marks which couldn’t be covered by the damp rags which had been his shirt. “Fucking ruined this.”“Take this seriously!” Jefferson snapped out. Hamilton glanced at him before nodding.“What do you want me to do Jefferson? I can either keep on protecting you or we can both get fucked up.”“You don’t have to fucking protect me.”“I do. You’re a civilian.”“So are you if you hadn’t noticed! All that bullshit about the army- you joined too young?”“By a year.”“So you went through this training when you weren’t old enough to do it?”“It doesn’t matter.”“Really? You just passed out from the amount of electricity they shoved into you.”“They’re sloppy. Aren’t even threatening you.” Hamilton closed his eyes and let his head rest against the wall. His chest did hurt and there was a burn in his veins that ached.“Why would they do that?”“It’s easier to play off someone else’s emotions. So if they hurt you and asked me the questions.”“Wil they do that?”“Probably not. I’ve told them enough times how much I hate you. If they think we don’t have a connection then it won’t matter.”“So do we just wait?”“If they do it. You can’t say anything. You can’t say anything.”“I know that.”“No. If they kill me then you can’t say anything.” Hamilton fixed Jefferson with his eyes. “If you think they’re about to kill me then you accept it. You do not release any secrets. I don’t care if you think they’re nothing. If you say anything then they’ve got a way in.”“And I guess it’s the same for me?”“Yeah. America is more than either of us. If we die protecting a secret then at least we’ve done something. Anyway, even if we did reveal something, chances are they’d kill us anyway.”“So we can’t do anything?”“We wait. We wait for Washington.”“And if he doesn’t come?” Jefferson asked softly. Hamilton’s response took a long time.“He will.” The certainty was gone. The next time the men came in they grabbed Hamilton with no preamble. Hamilton struggled against them and Jefferson shouted but it didn’t stop anything. Hamilton glanced at Jefferson as he was led away and Jefferson nodded.America’s secrets were her own.Jefferson was then left on his own for what felt like years. At random intervals someone would come into the room with water and food. On the third time it happened Jefferson noticed blood on the man’s bruised knuckles. His appetite vanished.No-one bothered to come into his room. It was painful to be left alone, as if everyone had vanished, as if he was the sole survivor of some terrible event. He tried to sleep the time away but there was only so much time he could spend unconscious until his body woke him up.At some point they unlocked his hands. He moved them experimentally and winced at how painful it was. There were cuts and bruises circling his wrists from where they’d cut into his skin.“Where’s Hamilton?” Jefferson was surprised at how raspy his voice was. He coughed before repeating the question. Short didn’t respond. He just left the room. Jefferson stared after him before he sighed. This was all going to shit.It had been a diplomatic mission. It had been a mission that was nothing. They had to go to Egypt, shake a few hands and then leave. There was no danger, no chance of danger. Somehow it had descended into this fuck up.When Hamilton finally came back Jefferson barely noticed it. He thought it would be someone with more food. Then he heard three set of footsteps. He opened his eyes just in time to see Hamilton thrown down the stairs. Their captors didn’t bother to chain him up and Jefferson could see why in an instant.Hamilton’s clothes were ragged and dirty. His face and fingers were covered in half dried blood. His legs looked wrong as he held them at the wrong angle. As he tried to move his left shoulder wouldn’t respond. It was swollen and his arm hung limply. Great clumps of his hair were gone, as if they’d been ripped out by hands holding them too hard.“Holy shit.” Jefferson breathed out. Hamilton smiled at that.“Hey.” His voice was barely audible. He’d worn it out with screaming. Hamilton carefully pushed himself up against the wall and leant his head back.“What the fuck did they do to you?”“Everything.”“Hamilton this is-”“Repairable.” Hamilton muttered. “Ev-everything. Repairable.” He raised his right hand to his left shoulder and whined slightly.“What’s wrong with it?”“Dunno. Fell asleep with it fine. Woke and it was fucked.”“Is it dislocated?”“Probably.” Hamilton closed his eyes and groaned slightly. “Really know how to fuck someone up.”“I thought you said they were sloppy.”“They are.”“Did you-” Jefferson paused. Hamilton opened one eyes.“Didn’t say anything.”“Fuck.”“They’re gonna do this to you. Gotta be strong J’ffson.”“Yeah.” Jefferson cursed again and Hamilton smiled.“I’m gonna sleep now.”“Okay.” Jefferson made sure to lower his voice. “You do that.” Hamilton nodded before his head drooped onto his chest and his breathing slowed. Jefferson kept watch over him as the hours increased.He hadn’t thought that Hamilton could be this strong. He hadn’t thought enough of Hamilton evidently. Hamilton had just been tortured and he was still trying to make jokes. Jefferson settled back against the wall. He was going to keep watch until Hamilton woke up, it seemed to be the least he could do.He had no real way of measuring time but he knew it had been a long time when Hamilton finally stirred.“They back?”“Not yet.”“Might give us time.”“And if they don’t?”“We’re fucked.”“I thought we were anyway.”Hamilton let out a gurgle of a laugh at that. He smiled at Jefferson through the mess that was his face.“You can be funny.”“Is it the end of days? Did Alexander Hamilton just compliment me?”“Still a dick.”Hamilton shifted slightly and hissed in pain as it jostled everything.“Hamilton, if your shoulder is dislocated you need to set it. The longer it goes without relocation the more likely it is to cause nerve damage.”“How the fuck do I do that?”“Can you get to where I am?”Hamilton raised an eyebrow at that and Jefferson nodded. He began to manoeuvre himself as far as the chains would let him. He managed to get within touching distance of Hamilton after several long minutes. Hamilton stared at him blankly.“This is going to hurt.” Jefferson warned.“Welcome to the party.”Jefferson nodded before he started to feel Hamilton’s shoulder. He could feel that the joint was dislocated. He slowly pulled it out but paused as Hamilton groaned in pain.“Just do it Jefferson.”“It will-”“Fucking do it.” Hamilton snapped out.“Relax.”Jefferson began to manoeuvre the joint before he pushed it back in. Hamilton let out a grunt of pain before he collapsed backwards. Jefferson began to take his shirt off. Hamilton frowned at him.“It’s better if there’s a sling.”“Use mine.” Hamilton shifted slightly and Jefferson slowly took off the rest of Hamilton’s shirt. As he did he saw more of the bruises and hissed in a breath. There was large black bruises over several of Hamilton’s ribs.“These are-”“Broken.” Hamilton nodded. “I know. So’s my leg.”Jefferson looked down at his leg and cursed.“Fucking hell Hamilton! What-”“You don’t wanna know.”“Hamilton-”“You won’t need to know, alright? Washington will be here.”Jefferson sighed.“He needs to get here quickly Hamilton.”“He’ll be here.” Hamilton’s voice wavered and he sounded as if he was about to start sobbing. Neither of them said anything else. The two had five more meals before anyone interrupted them. When they did it was sudden. Leader, Short, Muscles 1 and 2 stormed into the room. Short was holding a camera while Muscles 1 and 2 were carrying electrical equipment. Hamilton tensed a tiny bit as he saw the electrics, terrified of what he’d already been through.However they didn’t seem to have any intention of doing that again. Muscles 1 dragged Hamilton up. Hamilton could barely fight back but he tried. Muscles 1 punched him across the face and Hamilton all but collapsed.He was led to the chair and secured into it. He was staring straight down the camera. He looked a mess but there was nothing he could do to fix that. The camera was far enough away that most of his torso was in the shot, including the bruised shoulder from the messy setting Jefferson had tried.A red light appeared on the camera and Hamilton glared at it.“Tell us where the aircraft carriers are.”“Starts with fuck. Ends with off.” Hamilton muttered out. Muscles 1 punched him in the gut and he doubled over.“Tell us troop movement across the Mexico border.”“Fuck off.” Muscles 2 got a blow in that time, punching him in the face.“You’re a writer aren’t you? Or were before you were hired by Washington.” Hamilton didn’t grace that with an answer, just glared up at the man. Leader pulled out a knife. Hamilton tracked its movements as it came to rest on top of his index finger, at the knuckle just above his hand.“I’m not going to ask you again.”“You probably will.”At that Leader pushed the knife down and Hamilton let out a scream. Leader pulled the knife down to the second knuckle before releasing it. Blood began to drip down Hamilton’s hand and he took in deep shuddering breaths.“Who is Washington going to elect as his Secretary of the Treasury when you don’t come back?”“It’s not something we fucking discussed.” Hamilton lied. He let out a strange grunt from behind closed lips as Leader cut deeply into his second finger. The blood was dripping onto the floor and pooling. Leader repeated the process on his third finger.“Every question you don’t answer you get two cuts. You only have so many fingers Hamilton.”“Well noticed.” Hamilton spat out. His other hand was gripping the chair so tightly it was turning white. He wasn’t used to this agony, no matter what he’d told Jefferson.“Who is Washington’s biggest donor?”“Fuck off.”Leader cut even deeper this time and the blood began to pour down. Hamilton threw his head back and screamed.“What is the White House’s stance on disclosing conflicts of interest?”“Go fuck yourself.” Hamilton was breathless but he still glared at the man.Leader stared at him for a long moment before he placed the knife a knuckle further. Hamilton bit into his lip and whimpered as two more sections of his hand was shredded.“Do you not care about this? Do you think this is a joke?”“I think you’re a joke.” This time it was three cuts and Hamilton felt tears appear in his eyes. He willed them back. He was angry. He had to stay angry. He didn’t want to feel the pain, not yet. He’d have time later. He could think about how the skin had split, about how any movement was going to make them ache. He could worry about nerve damage later.“What are the President’s plans for my country?”“I don’t give a shit.”It continued until Hamilton’s fingers were nothing more than blood soaked messes. His eyes were beginning to flutter from blood loss and the sheer pain but he didn’t let himself collapse. He had to stay strong. They were recording this for a reason. He didn’t know what but he knew it was something. Jefferson was staring at him in horror but Hamilton kept his word, he didn’t say a thing.“Two last questions,” Leader grabbed Hamilton’s throat and forced him to stare at him, “first,” he pulled a gun from his jacket. Hamilton stared at it and took a long breath, “how attached are you to your legs?”“Had ‘em a long time.” Hamilton wheezed.“Second question.” Leader continued as if Hamilton hadn’t spoken. “What is the bill you plan to push through congress about the budget for war?” Hamilton stared at him for a long moment. Leader cocked the gun and Hamilton gasped slightly. The cold metal pressed against his head and he let out a whimper. He was entirely at the mercy of Leader, the man held Hamilton’s life in his hands, in the pull of a trigger.“Wait.” Hamilton whispered out. Jefferson’s head snapped up.“Hamilton you can’t-” Before Jefferson could finish speaking he was punched across the face. He watched in horror as Hamilton slowly stared up at Leader.“Tell me.”“Section one. All-” Hamilton took a deep breath as he committed to what he was about to do, “all legislative powers herein granted shall be vested in a Congress of the United States, which shall consist of a Senate and House of Representatives.”“What?” Leader spat out but Hamilton continued.“Section two. The house of Representatives shall be composed of Members chosen every second year by the people of the several states, and the-” Hamilton was cut off by a punch to the face but he did nothing, “electors in each state shall have the qualifications-” Hamilton was hit again, in the gut this time, “requisite for electors,” Hamilton’s mouth was bleeding and blood dribbled down his chin, “of the most numerous branch of the state legislature.”“Shut up!” Leader shouted. Hamilton just smirked at him from behind bruised eyes and a bleeding mouth.“No person shall be a representative who shall not have attained to the age-” Hamilton caught three punches to his face which made his head drop but didn’t stop his words, “of twenty five years and been seven years a citizen-” Hamilton broke off with an ear piercing scream as a gunshot echoed in the room. Muscles 1 un-cuffed him and he fell to the ground. He was kicked in the side but he kept mumbling the words of the Constitution.It was only when Muscles 2 caught Hamilton in the head that he fell both silent and unconscious.Jefferson stared at the blood pooling around Hamilton in horror. Then he was being lifted and shoved into the seat. He glared defiantly at Leader and was rewarded with a punch.“I’m not telling you anything.”“You’re going to tell us fucking everything!” Leader screamed as he closed his hands around Jefferson’s throat. Jefferson gasped for air and began scrambling at Leader’s hands. When Leader finally released him Jefferson collapsed back into the chair. He glanced at the camera before he stared back at Leader.Leader snarled before grabbing for the knife again. Jefferson refused to let the fear show on his face. Leader cut his shirt open and began slashing. Jefferson whimpered and then shouted as Leader sliced deeply into his chest.“This is just the fucking beginning.”“Go fuck yourself.” Jefferson replied. Leader responded by stabbing the scalpel like knife into Jefferson’s side. Jefferson let out a scream as Leader removed the knife and blood began pouring from his side.“Tell me the troop movement!”“No!”Leader began to slash wildly again before he paused. He raised the knife to Jefferson’s face. Jefferson took a deep breath as Leader traced along his cheekbones. Jefferson was shocked as the blade was ripped down from the top of his cheekbone to his chin. It split his top lip and he felt his mouth fill with blood but as soon as he could he was staring back at Leader.“Fucking talk!”“No.” Jefferson paused before he looked up at the man. He spat and saw, as if he was detached, that most of it was blood.Leader pulled out the gun and Jefferson felt his heart skip a beat. He closed his eyes.A shot rang out.Jefferson waited for the pain but it never came. Instead there were shouts in the corridor and his captors stared at the door. Leader started as the door slammed open to reveal men with assault rifles in full protective gear.Jefferson had a couple of seconds to understand what was happening before it felt like someone had kicked his in the chest. He doubled over with a shout of pain as gunshots exploded around him. Jefferson stared down and frowned as he saw a gap where there should be skin.A circular hole had appeared in his chest and blood was pouring from it. He stared at it in confusion before he realised that the amount of blood he was losing definitely counted as too much. His head started to get fuzzy and he frowned.Jefferson slumped to the side as the men ran to him.The last thought Jefferson had was that Washington had done it; Washington had saved them.
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
When Hamilton woke, it was to the sound of Washington’s voice. Hamilton opened an eye in confusion before what had just happened hit him like a truck. He sat bolt upright before yelping in pain.“Lie down son.” Washington’s hands were on Hamilton’s shoulders and Hamilton slowly laid back.“Sir?” Hamilton croaked out. Washington nodded.“I’m here Alexander.”“Jefferson?”“He’s in surgery right now. You need to rest. You suffered-”“Why’s he there?”“After you fell unconscious Jefferson was tortured and shot. It punctured his lung and grazed his heart. He’s been in surgery for the last twelve hours.”“Will he make it?”“It looks good.”“Okay.” Hamilton laid his head back down. “I knew you’d come sir. I- I knew you’d be there.” Washington looked old at those words, old and tired. He opened his mouth as if to say something but then closed it again. He offered a weak smile.“You should get some sleep son.”Hamilton nodded and slipped off within seconds. When Hamilton next woke up he was a bit more alert. The first thing he looked at were his fingers. There were stitches all the way up them. He flexed them and hissed in pain.“They told you not to do that.”Hamilton jumped slightly at the voice. He turned to the side to see Hercules sitting there. Hercules looked a mess. His eyes were hooded and he looked exhausted.“Herc.” Hamilton’s voice was raspy and Hercules winced.“Laf and John went to get some food.”“Jeff’son?”“He’s out of theatre. Going to be a lot of recovery but,” Hercules shrugged, “that was always going to happen.”“’M I okay?”“Well,” Hercules sighed, “your fingers are cut to ribbons, your shoulder was dislocated then shoddily reset, the injuries in your back got infected, you broke your nose, you broke your legs and you got shot.”“Normal day?”“Alexander this isn’t a joke!” Hercules shifted forwards. “We saw what you did. It was reckless and-”“Saw it?”“When you were rescued, the camera was recovered. Washington suggested that we watch it while we were worried about you dying. Don’t get me started on how Laf reacted to it. We watched what you did Alexander you-”“Didn’t say anything.”“Somebody threatened you with a gun and you recited the constitution!”“Funny.” Hamilton smiled and Hercules scowled at him.“It could have got you killed Alex.”“Didn’t.”“Because you got lucky. If the team had been delayed for another five minutes you could have bled out.”“Jefferson’s civilian.”“You’re not a soldier Alexander. You haven’t been for years.”“Knew torture though.”“That doesn’t mean that you should have antagonised them! You-”Before Hercules could continue his lecture John and Lafayette walked into the room. They both gaped in amazement to see Hamilton. He smiled at them and raised his hand to wave before he hissed in pain.“Don’t move them.” John said as he rushed to Hamilton. “They’re deep cuts and they’re not sure how much nerve damage was done.”“Petit lion you-” Lafayette broke off.“It’s okay Laf. I’m here now. I’m safe.”“Mon ami.” Lafayette began to cry and he walked towards Hamilton’s bed. He carefully draped his arms around the smaller man.“I’m here Laf.” Hamilton wanted to pat Lafayette on the back but the ache in his fingers stopped that. “Nothing will happen now.”“Mon ami- I- I have just visited Thomas. It is so worrying.”“Is he okay?”“Oui. But he has not yet awoken. He looks hellish. As if- as if he shall not. The doctors tell me he shall but fine but-” Lafayette shuddered. Hercules put a hand on his back.“He’ll be okay. Thomas Jefferson is harder to kill than a cockroach.”“What’re they thinking for me?” The silence in the room said everything Hamilton needed to know. “Well, that doesn’t sound great.”“The damage to your legs was extensive.” John sighed. “The broken bones started to heal in the wrong position. The bullet wound will take a while to fix but it shouldn’t be too bad. You’ll need physical therapy. It’s the same for your fingers. You can’t move them until they’re fixed.”“How long will that take?”“A long time.”“So I finally got out of being tortured and I get dumped in a hospital?”“Mon ami, if you did anything else then you may never fully recover.”“I know it’s just…”“You’ll get better Alex. It’ll be a long process but you will.”“Everything’s repairable.” Hamilton muttered. None of them asked what it meant. “So what happened while I was gone?” The three glanced at each other for a moment, as if they genuinely had no idea. Lafayette was the first to speak.“Ooh! Eliza finally proposed to Maria!”Hamilton smiled as the three caught him up on what had happened. It was relaxing in a way, to understand that the world kept spinning even when he’d been fighting for his life in a torture dungeon. It took another two weeks until Jefferson and Hamilton saw each other again. There had been a complication with Jefferson’s surgery which meant he was bedridden for longer. Hamilton was incapable of moving under his own steam with a wheelchair yet hated someone else pushing it for him.Jefferson walked into Hamilton’s room and took a seat beside him. Hamilton still looked a mess. His hair was slowly growing back in lumpy patches. Jefferson had no idea why he hadn’t just cut it all off. There were deep cuts fading to scars across Hamilton’s chest, areas his clothing didn’t always cover.Hamilton was asleep and there was something more relaxed about him. Jefferson smiled at that, he would hope Hamilton was more relaxed than the last time they saw each other. Jefferson’s gaze travelled over to Hamilton’s leg. They were both in plaster but one of them had a bandage above the plaster. The gunshot.“You know,” Hamilton’s voice shocked Jefferson, “if you wanted to stare at me you had plenty of time to do that when I was tied up.”“I trust you feel better then.”“Than when we last met? Yeah.” Hamilton leaned back and frowned. “Don’t mean it doesn’t still hurt.”“Your morphine?”“Trying to wean me off it. They think I’ll be able to go home soon.”“I’m going home today actually.”“Lucky you.” Hamilton pushed himself into a sitting position and glanced at Jefferson. He frowned as he saw the deep cut across his cheek. “Wha-”“After you passed out. Leader went a bit mad.”“Leader?”“The one in charge.”“You gave them names?” Hamilton’s voice dripped with derision and Jefferson shrugged. “What else did they do?”“Cut up my chest and stabbed me. Then he shot me in the chest.”“All he did to me was shoot me in the leg.” Hamilton grinned but Jefferson didn’t copy the expression. “What is it?”“I’ve never been that close to death before Hamilton. It- it’s not easy.”“Get a therapist. Seriously. It’ll be annoying and embarrassing but they’ll help you.”“Yeah.” Jefferson stood with a sigh. “Washington won’t let you go back to work for a while.”“It’s not like I can do it anyway.”“What?”Hamilton extended his hands and Jefferson blinked in surprise. The stitches hadn’t come out and the wounds were ugly. They hadn’t been cut cleanly and some of them were crooked, the stitches making them look worse. Around the wrists there were deep cuts from where the handcuffs must have bit in at some horrific point of his capture.“Everyone here has told me that if I type or write I might rip them open. I can barely move my wheelchair. I'll be working from home with a Dictaphone until they fully heal up.”“How long will that be?”“No-one’ll tell me.”“God Hamilton I’m so-”“I did this.” Hamilton spoke over Jefferson. “I chose to do this, not you. I decided to not give up secrets. I chose to stay loyal to my country. This isn’t your fault Jefferson.”“I couldn’t have done it. I couldn’t have protected you if this was-” Jefferson shuddered.“You will never have to. Go home Jefferson. Go back to work and make sure you find some way to cope.”“This, coming from you? How many times has Burr or Washington had to haul you away from your office?”“There I was trying to be a good person. Just-” Hamilton sighed. “This wasn’t your fault Jefferson. Go find whose fault it was. Give them hell for me. For us.” Jefferson didn’t like being in his house alone. It felt empty. It had always been too big and too quiet. Now it felt like the shadows were watching, as if there was something waiting to pounce on him. It became more and more difficult to sleep until he just gave up and turned to coffee and napping out at random times.Madison had been fixing him with worried looks over it but everyone was. The cut on his cheek seemed intent on scarring over and taking the longest time to do so. If he didn’t wear a tie some of the lower cuts could be seen and if he stretched could see the ones just above the top of his pants. The scars on his wrists were almost always on show and none of his clothes fit him from how much weight he’d lost.Whenever any evidence of his capture was on show people gawked at them. After a week of being at work Jefferson started sending out his secretary to collect food. At least Maria didn’t stare anymore. She had on the first day but then she had encased him in a hug so tight he thought they might become one.He knew she had a history of bad relationships and he knew that the last one had ended with the police and a restraining order. She understood some of it at least. Not enough, there was only one person who did, but some at least.When Hamilton came back to work Jefferson didn’t know what to do. He wanted to talk to the man, wanted to explode with questions and answers and words that he didn’t even have. He wanted to know how Hamilton kept it together.He wanted to know how he should pull through, how he should return to normal life after knowing he was one flick of a finger from dying. He wanted to know how to stop the nightmares and the images that popped up every time he closed his eyes; images of blood and death that didn’t let him pause, not for an instant. Jefferson wanted to ask Hamilton so much, he had so much he had to know.Jefferson walked past Hamilton’s office every day and heard Hamilton dictating to his secretary. Jefferson tried to convince himself it was the same thing. Everything was going fine. (Everything had to be going fine.) Then there was a report of a pilot. A pilot had crash-landed somewhere in Russia on a mission that needed code word clearance to access. Washington pulled Hamilton and Jefferson in as he always did. This time he did it reluctantly.It didn’t seem to phase Hamilton as he wheeled into the room. Jefferson stood at the edge of the room and just stared at the pilot’s face. He was young, too young to die.“Jefferson?” Washington asked. Jefferson looked to him and nodded.“Pardon?”“As Secretary of State I need you to work on the diplomatic side of this. Try to find out who did this before we need to send anyone in.”“Yes sir.”“Well, we’re done here then. Jefferson, Hamilton, can I have a word?” The rest of the room trickled out, leaving the three of them. Jefferson stepped forwards but Washington just gestured to a seat.“Can I ask what this is about sir?” Hamilton asked as he moved into place.“I understand that this might be a tricky subject for the two of you.” Washington glanced at Hamilton’s fingers which were laying in his lap. The stitches were gone but the cuts remained, crooked and ugly. He’d have them for the rest of his life. “So I wanted to say, if you are not capable of this then say it. There will be people who can take over from you if needs be.”“That will not be necessary sir.” Hamilton said. Jefferson nodded as well.“Well then go find this boy. Before something else happens to him.”The two left the room and Jefferson paused. Hamilton noticed he had stopped and turned.“Is something wrong?” Hamilton asked, frowning at Jefferson.Yes. Yes of course there is, Jefferson wanted to scream. We were kidnapped. We were beaten and tortured. We’re physically and obviously scarred for life. There was no risk and yet we nearly died. We were shot and if it had been five minutes later we’d be dead. You seem to not understand, you seem to have accepted it!“No, Mr Secretary.”“Good. If there is a problem, any problem, I’ll be in my office.”“Okay.”Jefferson went back to his office and sat down. The soldier’s face stared at him from his mind. He could be anywhere. He could be dead already. He could have been captured. He could be-Jefferson felt his breath speed up and he pulled his tie loose. He undid two of the buttons and ignored how his fingers scraped over the scars. He was going to be fine. They would find the soldier. They would save him long before anything happened.
Washington would find them.
“Thomas?” Jefferson looked up as his name was called. Very few people called him that. Madison stood in the doorway and Jefferson gestured him in. He took a steadying breath and smiled weakly.“James! Is there something I can do for you?”Madison glanced to Jefferson’s neck and Jefferson looked away. His tie was on the desk next to him which meant there were several cuts visible to his friend.“James, if you spend all the time staring at them I am going to get jealous.”“Sorry.” Madison muttered. Jefferson shrugged. “Thomas, I’m worried about you.”“No welcome?”“Thomas, when was the last time you went home?”“Yesterday.”“Thomas…”“I don’t have time alright?” Jefferson snapped out. Madison stared at him.“Thomas, if something is wrong-”“Nothing is wrong.”“Thomas-”“Nothing is wrong!” Jefferson wasn’t even sure when he’d stood up but he was on his feet. Madison took a step back and stared at him. “I’m sorry I-”“Thomas, if your work is getting in the way of your health-”“It’s not. I- this lets me not think about what happened.”“Is that healthy?”“Hell if I know.”“If it gets worse talk to me Thomas. Please.”“Okay. I promise.” The lie tasted foul on his tongue but it was sweet enough for Madison’s ears. When night rolled around Jefferson decided to go home. It was empty and too quiet but it was still home.His dreams were filled with blood, with pain and the cold, empty eyes of Hamilton staring at him, as if to say it was his fault. Jefferson wanted to scream back that it wasn’t, it had never been. It was a mistake.The dead eyes never had anything to say to that.Jefferson woke at three in the morning after two hours sleep. He got changed. He didn’t do it in front of the mirror anymore. He couldn’t stand seeing the star like scar of where the bullet had hit. He couldn’t stand to see any of his chest anymore.Showers were the only way of cleaning himself. He didn’t have to look down at the mess his body had become. He hadn’t dared look what Hamilton had come out with. Mirrors hurt as he saw the deep scar across his cheek.He hated his body, had ever since he’d woken up in hospital.Hamilton didn’t seem to be phased by it. In the few conversations they’d had Hamilton didn’t stare at Jefferson’s scars. He didn’t even seem to care about his own injuries. He didn’t wear gloves or use crutches. Jefferson wished he could be that strong.The work day was long and painful. He spent most of it calling different dignitaries’ offices and waiting for responses. The face of the soldier stared at him every time he closed his eyes, even if only for a second. It pushed him into working in a way he hadn’t in a long time.Maria would knock on the door occasionally with a coffee or meal but apart from that Jefferson didn’t look up from his work.The call came in at half past midnight.Maria walked into his office and told him he had to go to the Oval Office. Jefferson nodded and stood. He grabbed his tie and began to tie it as he walked.When he walked into the room his stomach dropped. Washington was sat at his desk. The Generals were stood around him and Hamilton was frowning.“Jefferson.” Washington nodded to him. “Now that we’re all here. I wish I had better news. Unfortunately the pilot, Jaune Fayad was captured. We have recovered his body. It shall be sent to his parents-”“He’s dead? You said he was captured.” Jefferson interrupted Washington who frowned.“Son, his captors killed him.”Jefferson nodded numbly as Washington continued. The words faded into one until they faded into white noise. There was nothing Jefferson could hear, nothing he could understand. The pilot was dead. The pilot had been kidnapped and had been killed. Jefferson had been-“Son,” Jefferson jumped slightly as Washington laid a hand on his shoulder. Jefferson looked around to see that the room was empty, “Go home Thomas.”“But sir-”“That is an order from your commander. Go home.”“Yes sir.” Jefferson walked to the door and paused as Washington spoke.“Thomas, we did everything we could for him.”“I know sir. It just wasn’t enough.” Monticello seemed particularly empty that night. The shadows were everywhere. They were everywhere.Jefferson hunched in on himself as his breath quickened. What if they were in the building?Jefferson sat bolt upright and stood, staring around wildly. What if they were coming for him again? The rational part of Jefferson fought for control. They can’t be here. They’re dead. He saw them die. Their blood sprayed onto him. He saw their eyes as they-Jefferson didn’t even realise he was in the bathroom until he was vomiting into the toilet bowl. He stared down before leaning against the wall. He felt tears spring to his eyes. Was this what it was like surviving? Was it terror every day? Was it terror in every fucking second?He didn’t want that. He didn’t want to think. He wanted the world to stop, just for a bit.He wanted to stop seeing the soldier he couldn’t save.One of the good things about having old money was that it could buy a shitton of alcohol. Jefferson stumbled into the kitchen and grabbed a bottle which had been chilling in the fridge since before he was taken.He poured the first drink into a glass.He poured the second drink into a glass.He poured the third drink into his mouth.He set the empty bottle aside.He picked up a new bottle. When the next morning rolled around Jefferson didn’t have the strength to pull himself out of the bottle. He called in sick as he walked to get another bottle.The next morning he did the same thing. He’d started throwing up at some point but he couldn’t care, couldn’t afford to care.He was lying on the floor staring at the ceiling when there were knocks on the door. He didn’t say anything, couldn’t be bothered. Then there was a click as the door opened anyway. It took his fuzzy brain too long to work out what that meant. When he had figure it out there were hands on him.Jefferson yelped and pushed the person away as he shouted at them. The person fell backwards and stared at him.“Get away from me! You can’t take me! I won’t go back there!”“Thomas it’s me! Calm down!”“Wha-” Jefferson looked around in confusion. “James?”“Christ, how much have you had?”“Don’t care.” Thomas lay down again.“Thomas-”“I don’t care.” Thomas’ voice was hard. “There’s no point anyway.”“What do you mean?”“Drunk, sober, still crazy. There’s no-one here. They died. I’m not in that basement. Hamilton isn’t dead.”“Have you been seeing these?”“Yeah.” Jefferson whispered. “The soldier-”“The soldier who was captured?”“Yeah.”“Hold still Thomas. I’ll be back in a bit.”“Please don’t go.” Jefferson grabbed Madison’s arm and Madison paused. “Please don’t leave me with them.”“Fuck. Yeah, I’ll stay.”Jefferson nodded and he felt the world spin around him. He wanted it to stop but he was pretty sure that if that happened the memories would come back.“Thomas, how much have you drunk?”“Lot.”“How long have you been drinking?”“Since I got home.”“From work?”“From the soldier.”“Okay I’m getting you to hospital.”Jefferson wanted to complain but the world was beginning to go black at the edges. He hoped the next time he woke up his captors wouldn’t be there. When Jefferson did eventually wake up he felt like hell. Madison was asleep in the chair next to him. His head was pounding and his mouth was dry. Jefferson groaned and Madison looked up.“Thomas, are you feeling better?”“What happened?”“You went on a two day binge.”“Don’t sound like me.”“Thomas this is serious!” Madison stood and Jefferson watched him with a frown. Madison didn’t get mad. Not really.“Why?”“Because you could have died! The amount of alcohol in your system means it’s almost a miracle that you didn’t. Are you suicidal?”“Of course not.”“Then try to explain this to me. Please.”“It’s-” Jefferson sighed. “When I try to sleep I see them James. I- I remember them hurting Alexander and me. I remember the gunshot and I remember them dying on top of me. I- I can’t sleep.”“Jesus Christ Thomas.” Madison sat back down and put his head in his hands. “Have you talked to a therapist?” Jefferson’s silence told Madison everything he needed to know. “This is dangerous Thomas. This isn’t a joke or something you can ignore. If it’s this difficult to sleep then you need professional help. You should get it anyway.”“I don’t want to.”“You sound like a child Thomas! You need it. This is serious.”“Fine. I- I’ll do it.”“Thank you.” The second time Jefferson felt his world spinning out of control was the day Hamilton collapsed in a meeting. They were shouting at each other again. Jefferson wasn’t even sure what they were debating, it just felt right. It felt right to have him there, to have him safe.Hamilton had been out of the wheelchair for a week and was bounding everywhere. Jefferson would watch him with a faint smile on his face and wish his own recovery was that easy.Jefferson stood and continued to shout. Hamilton did the same. Jefferson stepped forwards to come face to face with Hamilton. Suddenly his arms were full of the man as one of Hamilton’s legs buckled under his weight. Hamilton yelped but Jefferson supported him to the seat.“What happened?” Jefferson asked softly. Hamilton shrugged. “That’s not an answer.”“Hamilton?” Washington was on his feet and staring at the two. “Are you alright son?”“Yes sir. I just- I guess my leg isn’t as strong as I thought it would be.”“Well, don’t get into any more fighting contests with Jefferson and it should be fine.” Washington smiled and the meeting continued as if nothing had happened. Jefferson was silent as he ran over what could have happened. Was it the bullet wound or the broken bones? He needed to ask Hamilton. As Jefferson glanced at him he decided he’d do it as soon as the meeting ended, to save them both a bit of dignity.When the moment came Jefferson paused before he walked in the opposite direction. He didn’t dare go home, it was still too empty. Instead he called Maria to bring him a bottle of whiskey. She didn’t ask. He wanted to invite her in, to indulge in this with someone else, but he knew that wouldn’t help him. He needed to get sozzled beyond all recognition.Jefferson locked the door and took his tie off. He opened the bottle and poured a glass with a shaky hand.After a few drinks his mind began to question things. He raised his hands to his shirt and unbuttoned it. It fell away to reveal the scars. There were so many of them.Leader had gone to town on his skin and it looked like all of them had scarred over. The stab wound stood out sharply against the rest of his skin. He raised a shaky hand to the centre of his ribs.It had hit the lungs and had scraped the heart. It had almost killed him. The scar looked too small for that. It was a tiny scar from where a bullet had ripped his skin apart in pursuit of his life.Jefferson smiled at that. He liked that analogy. As if his skin was what protected him, as if the scarred mess of what he had left represented the fucked up life he had left. It made sense a hell of a lot of sense.A sob overtook him. His skin was marred from an event he had had no control over. He’d not been able to do anything. He had been told to do nothing by Hamilton and he had blindly obeyed. Because of him Hamilton took a gunshot wound to the leg. Because of him, Hamilton almost died.He had been telling the truth to James at the hospital; he wasn’t suicidal. On days like that he wished he was.A knock on the door startled him from his drunken stupor.“Jefferson?” Hamilton’s voice called through the door. “I- can we talk?”It’s Hamilton, a voice whispered in Jefferson’s ear, the man who you nearly killed. The man whose life you’ve ruined.Jefferson sniffed and lay down on his couch. After a few moments he heard Hamilton walk away. Good, he thought, Hamilton was in danger as long as he was with Jefferson. He tried to ignore the ache in his chest.That was probably just the bullet that should have pierced his heart. The third time Jefferson tried to drink himself into oblivion it was his own fault. It wasn’t a projection or seeing what his actions had wrought; it was just him.He’d looked at his file. He’d requested the official rescue information from the secret service and it finally ended up on his desk. He poured a glass for himself as he sat at his table. As soon as he opened the folder he knew it had been a bad choice.The men’s faces stared back at him, their eyes wide and staring. Jefferson felt his chest constrict and his breathing sped up. Those were the men who had nearly killed him, who had him at their mercy and he was only alive because-Jefferson hit the table and took in a deep breath. He poured himself a new drink and stared off into nothing as his fist pushed his nails into the palm of his hand.“They’re dead.” Jefferson whispered. “They’re all dead.”He wasn’t sure of it until the bottle was half empty. He took another drink, for good luck.The next day he couldn’t bring himself to regret it. The folder, that he did regret. As he’d become sober again, the memories of the men who had taken him pressed to the forefront of his brain. As he sat down for a breakfast he could barely stomach he knocked back a drink.When he scraped half of the meal into the bin he reached for a water bottle and filled it with the closest bottle he had. He wouldn’t need it, he assured himself, he’d never needed alcohol. It just helped him.As the day went on, the urge to drink grew and grew as every time he looked up he saw the folder on the side. By lunch the bottle was mostly empty and Jefferson’s mind was sufficiently numbed.Then Jefferson fucked up.He walked into the Oval Office drunk.Jefferson knocked because a good Southern gentleman always does. It was the afternoon briefing so only Madison, Burr, Hamilton, Angelica, Laurens and Lafayette were there. Madison frowned the moment Jefferson walked in but once more he didn’t say anything. Jefferson took a seat and stared up at Washington.“Good morning Jefferson.”“Good morning sir.”“Well, now that we’re all here I’d like to start. Hamilton?”“The banks are holding for now sir. Our currency seems to be down against the Dow but I don’t think there’s anything to be worried about. It may-” Jefferson frowned. Hamilton was talking too much. He did that a lot. Jefferson looked down at his own notes and frowned as they swum in and out of focus.“Jefferson? Jefferson?” Jefferson looked up to see Washington frowning at him. “Are you quite alright son?”“Yeah.” Jefferson frowned at his papers again. “So…” Jefferson frowned before he turned the page the other way up. “Makes sense.” Jefferson mumbled. He didn’t spot the worried looks Madison and Lafayette swapped. “So we, uh,” Jefferson paused, “everything’s good?”“Son,” Washington’s voice grew cold and he stood. He was an intimidating figure when he stood tall. Jefferson stared up at him in confusion, “Are you drunk?”“Sir-” Madison started before Jefferson shrugged.“’m not sure to be honest.”“I’ve got him sir.” Hamilton muttered. He grabbed Jefferson’s arm and dragged him out of the room. Jefferson was still clutching his water bottle and Hamilton had barely noticed it. They walked to Hamilton’s office and Jefferson collapsed against the sofa. “What the fuck?”“Wha?” Jefferson drawled out. He took another swig from the bottle. He’d nearly finished it. He didn’t really know how long it had been since he started it, didn’t really care. When the world was foggy he couldn’t feel the claws of the monsters.“You’re drunk Jefferson! In the middle of the day!”“Yeah.” Jefferson went to take another drink but Hamilton swiped it from him with an accusatory look. He sniffed it and twisted his face in disgust.“Fucking hell!” Hamilton hissed. Jefferson just watched as he moved around the room. Hamilton walked to his door. “Eliza, can I get two bottles of water and some painkillers please? Yeah, if anything comes up tell Madison to take it. He’ll be okay with it.”“James is always mad when you do that.” Jefferson let his head drop to the side. Hamilton frowned before he sat down next to Jefferson. He took Jefferson’s head in his hands and tilted it towards him. Jefferson stared at him.“How’d you do it?”“Not get drunk at work? I function like a fucking adult.” Hamilton went to drop Jefferson’s face but Jefferson caught his hand. Hamilton sucked in a breath before he noticed Jefferson was trailing a finger over the scars on his fingers.“How’d you do it?”“What do you mean?”“With being hurt.”“The same way everyone does.”“How do they?”Hamilton sighed. All the anger vanished from his face.“You’re drunk so you don’t have to deal with it.”“Yeah.” Jefferson continued to trace the scars until Hamilton pulled his hand away.“Have you talked to your therapist about this?”“No.”“You do have a therapist, right?”“Didn’t work out.”“Didn’t- Thomas!”“She wanted me to talk and I didn’t want to.”“Why not?”“Made it real.” Jefferson felt tears begin to trickle down his face. He reached for Hamilton’s hand again and began to trace the scars.“It was real. It did happen. It won’t happen again.”“Wasn’t meant to happen the first time.”“Everyone who hurt us, all of those men who took us, are dead. They died Jefferson. They can’t hurt us.”“I got blood on me.”“What?”“Got his blood on me. Didn’t realise I was shot. Thought it was him and I saw the blood. Thought we were safe.”“We are.”“We ain’t.”“How long have you been drinking yourself into oblivion?”“The pilot.”“The one that was captured?” Hamilton asked softly. Jefferson nodded. “You were out sick after that. I- I was worried.”“Went to hospital. James took me.”“Why do you do it?”“Why don’t you?”“It’s not healthy.”Jefferson laughed at that.“You took every single hit for me in that room. You didn’t let me get hurt. You took a bullet for me. You fucked up your hands for me. You could have given them any information but you didn’t. You-”“You’re right. I don’t have a good sense of self preservation. I did that because it wasn’t my first time.”“Wha?”“When I was in the army there was a reason I was discharged. My squad was captured and we were hurt until we broke out. I watched good men die around me. I saw Laurens nearly die. I thought that there was no way I could survive a second time. I’d given up in that room and I couldn’t let you give up as well.”“So why’re you happy?”“I’m not. I’m having nightmares. I’m having flashbacks and I want to self-destruct so badly but I know that won’t help. I’m living on borrowed time from the people who sacrificed themselves for me. I can’t let that vanish. I have to do something with it.”“What?”“I- I don’t know.” Hamilton looked lost, looked fragile. Jefferson snorted at that. This was the man who, when tortured and broken, recited the Constitution to his kidnappers. He wasn’t this broken.“You saved my life.”“Maybe I did. Maybe I didn’t. Maybe I screwed up your life. Maybe I screwed up my life. It-”“Why’d you screw up your life?” Jefferson mumbled. Hamilton frowned for a moment before he stuck his hands out.“I still can’t write. Can only type for a bit until they feel like they’re going to split open again. Doctors say it’ll all fix up eventually.”“You shouldn’t-”“I made my choices Jefferson. I made my choices to save you and to pay back what other people have done for me. You need to make a decision as well.”“What?”“Drink yourself to the bottom of a bottle or get help. Die a drunkard or live as a recovering alcoholic.”“That sounds difficult.”“Dying is easy. Living is harder.”“I don’t know how to.” Jefferson’s voice was soft. He didn’t know how to live, how to survive after he had fought so hard to stay alive. This world was so different to the one he’d lived in before he was captured.“I know. I know you’re new to this. I get that this isn’t easy to ask for help or to expect people could give it to you. We’ll sort that. We’ll sort all of it. Together.”“Thought you hated me.”“I hate your policies. I think you’re a stuck up, pretentious prick. I don’t hate you as a person.”“Stunning praise.”“Get some sleep Thomas.” Hamilton smiled as he stood. “We’ll talk more when you wake up.”When Jefferson closed his eyes all he saw was darkness.
|
10629441
|
The soft hours of our
|
{
"Archive Warning": "No Archive Warnings Apply",
"Category": "F/F",
"Characters": "Peggy Carter, Angie Martinelli",
"Fandom": "Agent Carter (TV)",
"Language": "English",
"Rating": "Explicit",
"author": "by lbmisscharlie",
"chapters": "1/1",
"completed": "",
"published": "2017-04-15T00:00:00",
"words": "1,941",
"Additional Tags": "Hurt/Comfort, Domestic, Domestic Fluff, Bathing/Washing, Bathtubs, Bathtub Sex, Post-Canon",
"Relationship": "Peggy Carter/Angie Martinelli",
"Character": null,
"Relationships": null,
"Series": "White Writing",
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|
Peggy doesn’t gripe. She’ll complain to Angie about work, will curse the ass-headed men in the streets who think calling a lady sugar as she goes about her day is a great compliment, will huff and groan about little annoyances when she knows Angie’s in a good mood and will humor her, but she doesn’t gripe about the serious things, the pains she feels alongside her own guilt.Her leg must hurt, immobile and stiff inside its grimy plaster cast, and the spectacle of bruises on her ribcage lingers on, a jaundiced chartreuse. “Yellow’s never been my color,” Peggy says wryly as Angie examines the bruise, lifting Peggy’s arm up and watching for a wince. Peggy’s too damned good at keeping her face composed. “Yes, the purple suited you much better,” Angie returns, guiding the sleeve of Peggy’s blouse down her arm. Peggy accepts her help without complaint, now, after the shouting match they’d had two weeks into her recovery. Angie doesn’t regret the words she said, not if they’ve led to Peggy slowing down.With one hand, Peggy grips the edge of the sink for balance; she’s all off-kilter these days, too few working limbs and too much time to think about all the ways they aren’t working, Angie suspects. Peggy’s a creature of instinct: act first, use the resources available, trust the body. Each step, now, she must plan through in advance, complicated battle movements just to progress from one room to another on her own.The blouse slips limply from Peggy’s shoulders, and Angie drops it to the tile. She wears nothing underneath, long hours on the sofa not quite necessitating more than a decrepit gabardine blouse, faded blue and worn around the collar, and an oversized woolen cardigan with enormous wooden toggle buttons. They’ve had to be a bit creative on her bottom half; Angie’s bought a large pair of men’s pajamas and slit them up the side of the leg to fit over her cast. Now she helps Peggy out of them, slipping down over her thighs and kneeling to work them off her calf. Peggy leans on her to lift her bare foot, kicking them away; her body is warm through Angie’s clothes. When they bought the house, the long, deep bathtub had them both in near gleeful joy, and they’ve taken sincere and frequent advantage of it. But now, as Peggy sits on the edge, leaning on Angie in order to slip her leg into the tub and slide her body down slowly while keeping her cast out of the shallow water, its size is unwieldy. Angie cups one hand around the hard cast surrounding her ankle, a misshapen mockery of a human joint in dingy plaster, helping hold the weight up. Peggy makes a tiny, wrinkled grimace as her hips settle, just enough to show how the sharp bend required to hold her leg up smarts, but her expression clears as she leans back and lets her head fall into the water.Her eyes flutter closed and for a long moment Angie is caught, transfixed by the soft parting of Peggy’s mouth, by the way her hair tangles in the low eddies of the water, fluttering and floating like the way Angie used to play mermaid on bath day, back when she was still a slip of a thing and the ocean seemed to offer the most vast, unexplored adventure she could imagine. Underneath the water, Peggy’s skin pinks; she likes it steaming hot, and to linger until her fingertips are wizened crones and the water is dingy and lukewarm. Angie guesses she’s not the only one to want, deeply, all those things the prime of her years did not afford her, for though she absolutely knows Peggy would not change much about her years during the war, the move to America and the end of rationing was a shocking welcome. Angie, too, remembers too many years of her Ma stretching the meat to share among the working men of the family – Dad and four brothers – and holding back something sweet for Angie to make up for it. And though food wasn’t scarce at the Griffith, the rent was dear and hard-won.In fact, she considers it a distinct victory that she no longer has to tie on an apron and fake a smile, cheek muscles aching to yawn instead; a home of her own and her name up in lights is much more than she thought she was allowed to dream for. A home of her own, and a love far deeper than she could have dreamed. Peggy surfaces, hair streaming back from her forehead, and levers a deep sigh. “I want you to scrub every inch of me,” she says, sounding more defiant than suggestive. Nonetheless, Angie can’t help the soft thrum of interest that catches her body at the sight of Peggy, nude. The bed upstairs is lonely.Still, she tugs down a washcloth, wetting it in the water over Peggy’s belly, which laps against her breasts, pink nipples just breaking the surface. She rubs the soap to a lather and starts with Peggy’s arm, the one draped over the side of the bath in front of Angie. Leaving her body limp, Peggy watches her through half-closed eyes as Angie rubs the washcloth in circles over her skin: the back of her hand, delicate over the small bruise that marks the IV injection site from her hospital stay, her knuckles, the gaps between her fingers. Up her arm, into the soft crevasse of her bent elbow. Peggy leans into her touch.Angie rinses the washcloth before shifting Peggy forward to start on her back. She lifts the heavy fall of Peggy’s hair, twisting it into a rope and bringing it around over one shoulder. It is fashionable for women their age to wear it bobbed, set once a week at the hairdresser’s, but Peggy’s falls down past her shoulders. Still dark, with a scattershot of silver.She rubs across the broad sweep of her back, its constellations familiar: the little dotted birthmark on the back of her shoulder, the jagged scar from a knife wound in ’54 across the side of her ribcage, the mole between the wings of her shoulder blades. Peggy stays quiet, eyes closed and body malleable, as Angie reaches over her to clean her other arm. Then her foot, a little scrub to the tender insole so that Peggy flinches, makes a face, and between her toes and up her calf. She rinses the washcloth.Underneath the dirtying water, Peggy’s body seems to ripple, its softness emphasized by the gentle lapping of the water. Angie washes her belly, its gentle, round sag, and up her ribcage to the undersides of her breasts.“Oh, go on,” Peggy murmurs, amused, when Angie lingers a bit at the space between her breasts. She’s always liked that bit, the soft gentle dip, fleshy over the hard plate of her sternum. “You’re a damned romantic,” Angie says, grinning when Peggy gives her that pleased-cat smile, and runs her hand over the swell of her breast, over her nipple, soft in the heat of the water. She gives it a little pinch, knowing the way Peggy’s mouth will gasp open before she catches herself. “How is your leg? Are your hips sore?” Angie says. Peggy hums, not discontently.“Could use a little more loosening up,” she says, glancing up at Angie and waggling her eyebrows. Angie tries not to reward her with a laugh, fails. Peggy’s grin grows wider, and she wiggles under Angie’s hand, still cupping the rise of her breast. Angie gives it a little smack, splash of water muffling the impact, and Peggy lets her teeth show, delighted. “I don’t know,” Angie says. “Wouldn’t want to strain you.” Peggy tilts her head back, flicks her lashes, almost parodic but for the way she bares her pulse point, the way she pushes her breast up into Angie’s hand. It’s hardly cajoling when Angie so wants to touch her, but she lets Peggy pout a little, lets her hand move tortuously slowly. “It’s therapeutic,” Peggy says, self-assured, and Angie laughs and dips one hand down her belly, skimming it over her skin in the still-hot water. The curls between her legs are springy, made soft by soap, and Peggy spreads herself open a little wider. Angie’s careful of her elbow, which tucks against the inside of Peggy’s propped-up knee, keeping her cast in its place on the edge of the tub, but brings her hand to cup around Peggy’s cunt. She’s hot, and slick deep in her folds. Angie uses two fingers to spread her open, watching the way Peggy’s mouth falls open at the heat of the water rushing against her flesh, then pets at her with her middle finger, dragging up the center of her cunt and flicking it over her clit. “You’re –” Peggy says, and Angie says, “Hmm?” drawing a circle around the hard bud of Peggy’s clit, watching her throat bob as she swallows. Sliding them up, she draws the hood back, and Peggy’s hips jerk at the sudden touch of hot water. “You take very good care of me,” Peggy says, a little breathlessly, and Angie laughs, kisses the crease of her shoulder where one arm is flung over the edge of the tub. “That’s why you keep me,” Angie says, fondly, and starts to stroke Peggy’s clit in earnest, the broad circles she favors. With her other hand, she pets at the curve of Peggy’s neck, fingertips grazing over the point of her pulse. It’s all awkward angles, Peggy’s hips canted sideways to accommodate the heft of the cast, Angie’s arm plunged under the water and her breasts pressed uncomfortably against the edge of the tub. It doesn’t matter much, not when Peggy’s chapped, bare mouth drops open in a soft whimper, when under Angie’s hand her flesh is hot and tender.“Yes –” Peggy says, and then – “Darling –” and clutches at her own breast, thumbing hard over the nipple. Her hips jerk up under the water, sending a splash over the edge; Angie leans into her, soaked up to her elbow and across her chest, and rubs at her clit with the pads of three fingers until Peggy’s hip go stiff and her teeth clench. As she falls back into the tub with a gasping exhale, her cast thuds awkwardly against Angie’s elbow. She jerks her arm out of the water to keep it from falling in, and the whole thing sends a wave up to splash across her front. She huffs; Peggy keeps her eyes closed, but her mouth tips up in amused contentment. She drops her head to the back of the tub and sinks a little lower, water covering her belly and breasts to lap at the rise of her collarbone. Angie rubs her thumb at Peggy’s temple, fondly.“I should wash your hair,” she says; Peggy hums, eyes closed. Letting her fingers trail in the water, Angie flits them through Peggy’s hair, feeling it buffer softly against her fingertips. The shampoo is on the rack up above them; instead of getting up she folds one arm on the edge of the tub, across her chest, and leaves the other to dip in the slow-eddying water, just brushing against Peggy’s shoulder. Peggy smiles a little, turns her head to nudge her mouth against the backs of Angie’s knuckles. Her eyelids are traced with pale veins, the corners of her eyes creased. Angie’s arms are sore, and the front of her blouse is soaking, but the water is still warm, so they linger.
|
10669947
|
Bound by Stars
|
{
"Archive Warning": "Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings",
"Category": "M/M",
"Characters": "Avitus Rix, Female Ryder | Sara, Male Ryder | Scott",
"Fandom": null,
"Language": "English",
"Rating": "Explicit",
"author": "by Stumblings",
"chapters": "4/?",
"completed": "",
"published": "2017-04-19T00:00:00",
"words": "5,697",
"Additional Tags": "Light Bondage, Male Slash",
"Relationship": "Avitus Rix/Male Ryder | Scott",
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"Fandoms": "Mass Effect: Andromeda, Mass Effect",
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|
Avitus moved his thick leathery hand down the column of the younger man’s suntan neck, down towards his chest. He found a dusty nipple and rolled it between his two thick fingers, pinching it. Scott whimpered, biting down on his bottom lip, arching his lean back. Releasing his swollen lip, he left it to be claimed, tongue to be tasted. Avitus chuckled deeply, catching the human’s lip tugging on it gently with his own plated lips. Dragging his claw lightly down the human’s chest continuing his journey between Scott’s legs. Thankfully he filed his claws down, human flesh was delicate. The human’s bright cobalt eyes flew open tensing under the turian’s attention. But after few quick strokes, and some gentle pinching of the foreskin, he had Scott mewling. Digging his blunt nails into the sizable hand pinning them to the silken sheets. “Scott”, the turian silky voice sent a tingle down his spine. Scott twisted and grasped, his body and mind was at war with what Avitus was doing to him, and what he would do. Scott's need to get closer and the need escape played in his stormy expression. Dark brows furrowing in frustration and arousal. “Damn it, I…” Scott gasped against Avitus’ lips. “To…” His pleading tone had Avitus’ plates shifting. “I don’t understand what are you doing. You make me….” Scott gasped indignantly as Avitus squeezed. “You’re punishing me for this and you’re the one fucking with me.” He growled thrusting his lean hips impatiently into the turian’s rough hands. “I’m punishing you for coming without permission.” Avitus chuckled, nipping at the human’s abused lips. “Fuck, I can’t help it.” Scott tugged aggressively at his arms being pinned down by the turian’s other hand. Damn him, damn Avitus, using his superior strength. Here, he thought the turian was sweet. The turian leaned in whispering in Scott’s ear “ I know.” Scott shivered as Avitus’ mandibles brush against hypersensitive his jaw and cheek. “ Then why do you do it, jack ass” Scott groaned, as the turian dragged his rough tongue down the column of neck. “Because…” Avitus chuckled deeply “It pleases me.” The turian watched the question 'why' write itself across Scott’s flushed face. “See...good boy.” Avitus let go of Scott’s cock. It jutted obscenely from between his muscular legs, foreskin flushed red, wet precum weeping from the tiny slit. Were all human males this wanton? Exposed, no protective plates? Avtius, felt the pressure building behind his own plates, leaking and ready to unsheathe. “Scott…” Scott opened in his eyes, looking up at the turian’s chiseled face, confused. The turian smirked at down at him. “Scott…” Something was off, Avitus’ voice was too high. “SCOTT!!!” He felt himself being shaken back and forth effortlessly. More questions, more confusion, Scott’s entire body relayed on the insanity of the paradox. Avitus’ handsome face blurred, voice hitched, “For fucks sake, SCOTT!” Scott jolted upright out his bed. His breath was heavy, irregular, he became aware of the humid heat and straining of his fingers and toes.“Damn good dream, Scott?” Sara Ryder’s voice impishly giggled at her bother’s condition. “Shit Sara! Heard of knocking?” He signed bringing a hand to his face, pressing his fingers and thumb into his eyes before dragging the palm down his face. “Sam informed me, your heart rate was abnormal.” She smirk, blue-grey eyes twinkled with mischievousness. “Now, I know why.” “Fuck” Of course she heard him, now the ‘cat was out of the damn bag’. He glanced up his twin sister, rolling his eyes. “Maybe, you should talk to him.” She suggested shrugging her shoulders. “Or you could keep abusin’ that left hand.” She turned her on the ball of her feet and giggled impishly out of the door. He rubbed his scar; still feeling a slight euphoric tingle. Water, he definitely needed water and a shower. A cold shower.
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
The Vortex flashed a rainbow swirl of neon disco lights. It was hot and sticky; but the light gush of cool air ,from the fans, felt good on his twany bare shoulders moving among the pulsing bodies. Damp hair clung to his dewing face as he pulsed and moved with the crowd losing themselves to music’s savage beat. He was held by the elbows ,on either side, by a beautiful Salarian and human woman, drunkenly giggling, trying to escape their inevitable realty. Scott laughed, watching Natan smile, it had been such a long time since she had. She worked endless repairing the Paarchero , keeping the medical bays working and salarian clutches stabilized. Her coral and ivory scales lit-up with a beautiful iridescent shine under the flashing club lights. Her inky eyes flashed with excitement as she bobbed her asymmetrical head to the pounding beat. She was his official best friend, she laughed again throwing her head back, flashing her white teeth at him. Nicole’s dark brows furrowed slightly, she tugged on his other elbow causing him to stumble effortlessly into her body. A childish giddiness bubbled up and passed through his perma-smile, cobalt eyes sparkling with amusement.
The tequila fairy made Scott feel warm and soft, blurring the edges of his vision. “Wha , are you doin’, Coley?” Scott stumbled over his words wiggling his arm from her tightening grasp. Nicole looked flustered and sputtered a uninhibited excuse about wanting to dance alone. Scott quickly shook his head, excusing himself from a now uncomfortable situation. Natan, thankfully, noticed Scott’s unease and pulled the other woman deeper in the throng of swaying people. He’d pay her back later. 'Damn' he thought walking towards the bar, 'it had been a good night'. Sighing, he and Natan busted tail patching Paarchero when it docked with the Nexus. He just needed an escape. He could feel his fingertips tingle, he felt clammy, throat dry. Rubbing his thigh unconsciously, he just wanted this fucking galaxy to disappear. Or maybe it was just him fading away. Scott slipped out of the sweaty masses, trying to find a cooler place to retreat. Sara was changing the galaxy, charging forward, and conquering the wilderness that Andromeda had to offer. Those moments mattered, she mattered. Clacking around the Nexus, patching pipes and tweaking programs wasn’t important. Those moments didn’t matter. He didn’t matter. Damn, cyro accident, left him helpless and disjointed. Scott slowly limped towards the crowded bar, maybe another drink would brighten the mood, chase this psychogenic monster away. Part way to the bar, he spotted solitary figure, concealed in the shadows. A figure he observed from a distant and worshiped in his waking stupor. Hell, even in his dreams. The beat of music seemed to boom loudly throughout the dimly lit bar. The bass thud like a pulse throughout his ribs but it wasn’t why his heart started to beat faster. Avitus. Something about the turian always made Scott’s heart race. The turian was crouched over his drink, despondently running his claw around the rim of his chilled glass. He looked alone, crestfallen, damaged. Scott watched the turian wave down the asari bartender pushing the still full glass away from him. The bartender frowned reached out grabbing the Avitus’ hand, startling him. She gave him a kind and comforting smile before he nodded and headed towards the door. Towards Scott. Scott’s thoughts dulled falling into a drunken stupor. Avitus always put color in his cheeks, deep baritone voice that seem to dip into a deeper octaves, golden predatory eyes that made him tingle with excitement. He felt himself flushing at his own memory of the turian whispering in his dream “because...it pleases me.” Blood rushed away from vital organs, he started to feel feverish. It wasn’t until he slammed into a hard form, did Scott realized he stumbled into the turian. Avitus inclined his head towards Scott, eye plate raised, watching him with cautious curiosity. “Shit...sorry...man..ah turian...fuck” He stuttered, screwing up. Scott felt wobbly, woozy, and stupid, losing his footing stumbling with the awkward elegance of sloth in the towering figure. Avitus moved with an unnatural stealth, catching Scott by the waist and tugging him close keeping the human from hitting the floor. The neon lights became blinding, bouncing off Avitus’ armored skull, highlighting it’s handsome form. Heartbeats boomed, one young, quick, and embarrassed, the other slower, stable and confused. Avitus’ nose twitched, mandibles shivered slightly, before he let the attractive human go. Avitus tilted his head, flaxen eyes flashing “Are you ok?”. He watched the human attempt to mumble an excuse before looking him in the eyes. Bright cyan eyes sparkled , pupils dilated, face flushed, he couldn’t have been over twenty-three. Scott reached out gripping on the turian by his cowl. He felt feverish suddenly “No, not so much any…” He stumbled again, feeling hotter and hotter until his stomach wrenched.
“ I feel like I’m going to throw…” His stomach wrenched again. Fuck, now! His vision blurred, it started to fade into black. Fuck! Scott, smooth as fucking ex-lax. Before completely passing out, he felt something sweeping him up, he was floating. Soft whispering voices, rough leathery hand on his forehead, and distinct flanging sound of the Turian Sam discussing human intoxicants. Damn good, impression Scott. Damn good. Finally, darkness consumed his consciousness
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
Panic replaced some of his confusion, hissing with frustration, quickly carrying the human down housing wing to his quarters. The Hyperion was a greater distance away and he could easily have his Sam call for Doctor T’Perro. Hopefully, the human Tempest was still docked. He only trusted the Asari doctor with more delicate matters. Passing out in the Vortex could get the human suspended with psychological evaluations. No that wouldn't do, this human had become integral to his Nexus life, suspending the man from his duties would dull Avitus days. Avitus paused adjusting the human’s head pressing on his sharp arm spur, pausing just briefly to admire man’s strange yet interesting fringe. It was lustrous, soft-looking, a chestnut shade at the base transitioning to a soft honey hue. Grumbling to himself, the human’s beautiful fringe caught his attention several cycles ago, while the man was repairing Director’s Tann’s computer display. Since then Avitus’ fingers twitched, his infatuation grew, spirits, he wanted to touch it- to touch him. Avitus, kept tabs on the younger man, watching him work with the Salarians or random repair jobs around the Nexus. Unsure of how to approach the youthful man, if he should. A pained groaned escaped from the human’s full lips, his body twitched, dark thick brows furrowed with uncomfort, pulling the turian out of his stupor. “Sam, page Dr. T’Perro. Tell her, we may a poisoned human...in my quarters.” Avitus grunted, shaking his head continuing to his room. Only a few paces away. A familiar automated voice responsed to Avitus gruff request. “Yes, Pathfinder.” “Thanks...Sam.” Avitus turned as if he were responding to another being, still not use to the voice chripping in his mind. “ Do you know any human first aid?” He requested in a smooth, practiced tone. “A medical scan would assist in diagnostics, Pathfinder.” The Turian Sam’s voice stated with almost seemly soft patience.“Right.” He shifted the human’s weight in arms, entering his code in the smooth security console. The door swooshed opened bombarding him with the heavy scent of gunpowder and expensive leather, ‘Thank the Spirits, home’. He felt tense. Avitus crossed the room quickly, towards the bedroom. Carefully placed the human on his side, leaning over the man as he prompted the human’s back up with standard pillows. Leaning over the man’s form, he could feel his predatory instinct lurch forward. The sunlight slipping through the metallic blinders became blinding, his pulse rose, plates started to itch. Under scent of clean skin, was still a tease of youthful sweat, it had a sweeter flavor, delicious. It tightened a noose around Avitus’ throat and he struggled to swallow. Damn it, it had been so long since he’d ‘blown off steam’. It was a trick of the mind. An almost last ditch effort for his body to trick him into something more primal. Grumbling, he pulled himself away from the human. Yet, the air around him hinted of sweet sandalwood and tobacco. Damn. He had been casually watching the human for last few months. He tried to forget the attractive scent, lustrous golden fringe, and crooked smirk. He found himself constantly struggling to forget the odd human. Yet at the Vortex, he watched the human dance with his friends, Avitus shivered, felt like purring, rhythmically swaying as if caught in a trance, as the human swayed his lithe hips. Back and forth…Back and forth....He had Avitus watching, waiting, hunting. His mandibles quivered, the need to release tension and dominate urged Avitus to strip the young man, and push him over the bar. “A medical scan of the human, would be helpful for treatment, Avi.” Sam’s request felt like ice had been dumped crudely down his back. Avi- He felt the current take him, sweeping him out into a preverbal brisk dark sea. He had let himself go with it- being pulled deeper, swimming quietly, sinking- Avi. Damn, damn, damn. His mandibles trembled, eyes burn with tears, subharmonics unconsciously whimpered. The Initiative had praised his work, his courage and sangfroid. But not Macen. Macen had-wasn’t…..Spirits, how it hurt, even now, to think of Macen…He hissed angrily, here he was pining after some Earth stripling. Impulsiveness had always been a weakness of his- Macen kept him restrained, loved and comforted. He snorted in disgust, dark unhinged emotions rolled through his stomach. T’Perro’s restrained voice brought Avitus to senses. “ Did you get a medical scan of the patient?” Avitus inclined his head towards the fresh-faced asari. “No, I’ve been trying to keep him prompt up.” He answered curtly, restraining himself. Hiding, his emotional state from the astute doctor. Movement stirred the air as she approached him. “I see, ah...Scott Ryder.” She said stopping at the side of the bed, pulling her omni-tool out, scanning the human passed out on the bed. “I should have known.” She paused, turning to Avitus, “He’ll be fine, I’ll send a nurse up with a strong acetaminophen.” Dropping her arm to her side, she giggled softly. “ The real mystery is, why is he here, Pathfinder?” Her cobalt eyes twinkled with humor before she headed towards his door, breaking into a dimpled smile. Her beguiling oyster-white teeth lite up the room, Avitus felt a jolt, like an electric current that megawatt smile gave when her full attention was on a person. He could feel his neck heat up. “It’s not what you think, doc.” He shuffled his feet, scratching behind his fringe out of nervous habit. “I didn’t even know his name, until now.” He felt the heat under his skin spike, eyes shifted uncomfortably under the doctor’s observation. Her laughter rang out across the room , “That hasn’t stop anyone before.” Sobering, she hit the button on the door, “Something high in animal fat for breakfast. It’ll help, with the headache.” The Asari doctor, paused on the threshold, “Do you want me to send medics to get him?” She thrust her thumb in Scott’s direction. Avitus carefully sat down next to the slumbering Ryder, another whiff of his sweet scent teased his self control. “He stays.” Avitus met T’Perro’s gaze. If the turian had half the of bravery as he had anger in his eyes, she felt she might have actually been in danger. “I’ll watch him.” Avitus’ protective subharmonics raised goosebumps on her arms. Confusion replaced some of her fear. T’Perro flicked a look from Scott to Avitus, then to the empty bottles of liquor on the workbench in the corner of the room. “Alright, call me, if there are any complications.” She bowed her head and walked out of the room, leaving him alone with Scott. The heavy sheets whispered as Scott moved into Avitus periphery. The harmonious mixture honey colored hair on his head made his skin glow more golden. Was the mother a blonde? Blonde, right? Alec Ryder wasn’t, so she might have been. “Sam, pull up the Ryder’s records.” He requested, getting up heading towards his dresser. He growled, he was tense and needed something…anything. Glancing back at the human, he quickly changed into pajamas.“Pathfinder, I have pulled all records on the Ryder family” Sam paused briefly “ Is there particular file you would like access to?” The turian AI inquired. “Fuck...damn...shit, son of a whore…” The turian jumped, startled by the sudden yelp. Turning, he found Scott leaning over the mattress gripping his temples. The human seemed frazzled, disorientated, his skin was slightly sallow. “ Fuck me, my head.” He groaned, squeezing his temples. “Why are you here?” Scott tossed sleeply uneasy glance towards the turian, then back to the bed. “You’re in my room.” Avitus couldn’t help track the expose lines of Scott’s body with a hungry gaze. He wasn’t small, but he would never be stocky or built. He had a swimmer build, lithe, yet subtly masculine. His eyes were unfocused cerulean, a bombay sapphire. Like the deep end of a pool, surrounded by dark lashes that gave him an air of innocence. It made Avitus hungry."Fuck, that's a night I would've liked to remember." Scott mumbled sluggishly, his luminous white teeth flashed as he pawed at his fringe.
----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
“ Remember…what exactly?” Avitus smirking, sitting back in his favorite chair. He had to pull , as humans say, some strings to get the chair from Tann’s office. He smirked, stretching out his long legs out in front of him, twiddling his left toes. “I can think of a few things…” Scott paused ,flushing, when he realized the turian’s full attention was on him. There was something dangerous and provocative about Avitus’ gaze, it made him quiver. As if were prey, cornered. Scott held his gaze for all of three seconds before blushing, finding something more interesting on the carpetted floor. “ Damn, called me out on my shit,” He rubbed his hands on his knees, before glancing back at the ex-Spectre, “I’m not sure.” “I can” Avitus stated with a certain abandonment. He paused briefly, what was he thinking? Scott’s luminous eyes watched the turian, he slid his legs over the bed, before walking over the mini bar. Avitus curiously cocked his head watching Scott skillfully mix some concoction over by the window. Had he cross a cultural line? He could have sworn the human was interested in him. Ryder’s leather pants did nothing to hid the definition of his ass and the under shirt clung to him like a second skin, showing off his lovely tapered waist. Too young. Avitus didn’t care if the man’s records stated 23, he was too young. He wasn’t ready for stability. Grunting to himself, why was he thinking of stability? Relationships, hell why was he so infatuated with this human. He carried the intoxicated man from a bar only a few hours ago. Now, he wanted to do, what with him, exactly? Scott straightened his back quickly throwing back his mix drink. Too young. “Hair of the dog…” Scott stated cocking his at Avitus’ lounging figure. He crossed the room towards the turian, stopping at arm of the leather chair. Scott was young. His beardless cheeks and chin scarcely needed a razor. His skin was tan and freckled from exposure from the sun. Sun-bleached hair glowed under the bright overhead lights, his sparkling cobalt eyes stared back Avitus with an untamed wildness. Too young and too wild. Yet, this knowledge didn’t dissuade Avitus from hardening behind his protective plates, or stop the urge to run his hands over the man’s golden supple flesh. Damn, his self-control was slipping. Was age or loneliness? Avitus squeezed the arms of his wing backed chair. ***********
The turian sitting in the hideous leather chair watched Scott with an intense hunger. It was hard to judge a turian’s age, however wrinkles around his golden eyes and wear of his red colonial markings suggested he was over thirty, maybe even earlier forties. Who knew, who cared?But his intense stare belonged to someone much older, experienced. A man who had seen the galaxy in a way, few would want too and done things no one would want to. A Spectre life? Avitus’ gaze stalked Scott, as if studying him, it unnerved him and aroused him. Avitus, presence wasn’t evil but danced on the shadowy line between ethical and corrupt, as if he existed in between the two places. Whatever it was, it called to Scott’s subconscious awakening, a need he’d never felt before. He was so caught up with everything, he almost forgot why he was here. Something about drinks, party, good time? He cleared his throat, asking in a cocky, hopeful voice, “You can what?” “I think you know.” Avitus voice was deep, smooth and slipped under Scott’s skin, in ways no intergalactic porn could. Shit, Scott sworn to himself, he was playing a dangerous game. He prayed he wouldn’t get hard and make himself look desperate, but Avitus’ voice. He was decidedly screwed, maybe even literary--if he played his cards right. “ Something-casual?” Avitus reached out wrapping his warm hand around Scott’s glass taking a quick sip. Then quickly setting the glass down, the turian snagged the human by the pants, pulling Scott into his lap. Avitus, leaned over brushing his mandibles against the delicate shell of Scott’s ear softly whispering “What do you think, Scott Ryder?” Scott, flushed, reached up digging his nails in Avitus’ cowl, balancing himself. Scott’s cheeks grew hot, dropping his forehead against the turian’s. Avitus froze momentarily. Concerned Scott picked his head up and watched Avitus’ expression change into one of stern concentration. His brow plates furrowed, mandibles tightened against his handsome face. He looked agitated, disorientated, even confused. Surprised by the sudden change, Scott brushed the furrowed brow plates with his fingertips, leaning forward pressing his soft lips against the turian’s. Avitus’ eyes widen slightly, before quickly tilting his head to catch the human’s lips between his sharp teeth. Avitus reached up tangling Scott’s soft hair with his claws and tugged harshly, exposing Scott’s fragile neck “You haven’t answered my question.” “Fuck-yes.” Hunger, need, and want consumed Scott. The fire in Avitus’ gaze belonged to a drowning man trying to find land and escaping unforgiving sea, attempting to drag him under. How long had Scott been dreaming of this- the knowledge he had this effect on Avitus’ set something loose in him.Whatever it was, it must have shown on his face because Avitus growled, pulled his hair, leaned in and nipped the exposed throat. “Good.” Using his left claws, he tore the human’s thin cotton shirt from him. Running his claw lightly down the human’s back, he possessively growled “I don’t share, Scott. Do you understand?” He paused, continuing to pet length of the human’s tawny back. Enjoying the soft skin, strong muscular back, supple flexing buttoxs. Rolling his lithe hips, Scott moaned “ Yes, god damn it.” Scott freed himself from the Avitus’ strong grasp, attacking the turian’s exposed neck with his blunt teeth.“On your knees” Scott paused briefly, pulling back to look at Avitus. Scott was confused by Avitus’ provoking demand. He must have moved too slowly because Avitus grabbed him by his hair and forced him down. Scott wiggled from the the turian’s grasp glancing up, he quirked a thick eyebrow, quietly questioning Avitus’ motative. Losing a little confidence, Avitus coughed, “Saw it in a vid…” His subharmonics cooed uncomfort, his burly fingers fidgeted in Scott’s hair. Scott bite his bottom lip keeping himself from giggling, running his hands up the turian’s powerful tights, “ A vid, huh?” He lifted himself on his hunches, pressing lips against Avitus’ nervous mandibles, winking at him. “Alright, gotcha big boy.” Sinking to eye level with the turian’s crotch, the scent of sex and heavy metallic male musk filled Scott’s lungs. Scott peered up, kneading Avitus' inner thighs, waiting for his next order. He could play ‘good’ boy, for a bit. The turian watched him for a moment before issuing his new order. “Undo my belt.” Avitus voice returned with confidence and power. Scott impatiently tugged the silky belt, Avitus’ cock escaped from his protected plates, almost hitting Scott’s cheek. The scent of masculine hormones mixed with the room’s scent, had an provoking effect on him. Less than an inch from his swollen lips, Scott watched a tear formed at the silt in the thick indigo head. Scott was a little worried, the fat head seemed impossibly huge, could he handle it? Avitus pulled Scott’s lustrous hair, “Open your mouth.” “Scott.” The sharp sting of his hair being pulled made him gasp. Avitus thrust his lithe hips, pushing through Scott’s parted lips. Instinct kick in, Scott quickly tried to jerk back but the turian held on. Momentarly, urge to gag surpassed the need to swallow. Come on Scott, breath through your nose. He reminded himself, Scott inhaled. The new breath awakened his taste buds and the strange sweet and bitter flavor of precum joined Avitus’ natural favor. It was addictive, a moan escaped Scott’s lips causing Avitus to smile. “Shit, Fornax wasn’t kidding.” Avitus moaned, his subharmonics purred with pleasure. The turian, slowly drew back until there was only the tip at Scott’s tongue, and then pushed back in the warmth again. The corners of Scott's lips curled, involuntarily -- and he fought back hard as his cheeks swelled momentarily with the pressure -- but it was no use. His laughter erupted, “Fornax?!” Crawling, into the turian’s lap, Scott nuzzled the side of the hot neck. He leaned back, cupping Avitus’ face, “How much research did you do?” Avitus felt his skin flush, he stood up quickly knocking Scott from his lap, embarrassed that he allowed his fantasy to slip. “This was a mistake--ah- sorry, leave.” He stammered, walking towards the mini bar, adjusting his pants back in place. He grabbed a glass and light mulberry bottle, pouring a glass, he grew angry with himself. How could he let loose like that, flustered, he was ex-spectre! A former student of Saren, he had better control then that. He jolted as warm soft body pressed behind him, glancing down, he notice an odd five-fingered hands wrapping themselves around his bare plated-chest. Scott’s thumbs stocked the exposed leather skin. Avitus turned swiftly, slamming the glass down, anger replacing embarrassment “I thought I told you to--” Avitus lifted his arm to push the human away. Scott gave Avitus a crooked smile, pressing himself against the flustered turian, not caring that his hard cock pressed against Avitus bare stomach. Scott’s entire body throbbed with an boyish charm and need. “ Baby, it’ll take more than a few awkward interspecies lines to turn me off.” Scott, picked the mulberry beverage, took a swig before wrapping his arms around Avitus’ head. “ I really enjoy the tough guy routine…” the man purred seductively. Avitus met Scott’s heated glaze, “I think that---” Scott slammed his mouth against Avitus’ plated one’s, shoving his his tongue into the turian’s mouth. Avitus jerked and tried to pull away but Scott fisted the turian’s fringe and locked his quivering thighs around Avitus’ waist. Whatever curse or threat Avitus made turned into a heated moan. A shudder ran down him hard enough to vibrate the bar and any resistance to Scott’s probing his mouth vanished into a greedy feeding. Avitus’ sucked Scott’s smooth tongue, sweeping inside exploring the moist cavern, enjoying the combined taste of alcohol and natural salty flavor. Avitus pulled away, gasping, eyes glazed, his thick skin felt flushed. A growl ripped through Avitus, he threw Scott off his hips, half stumbling away from the bar. Avitus caught his balance and turned towards the human, the turian was going to kill him. But before, Scott could get to his feet, Avitus pulled him off the floor with a strong tug. One strong arm around Scott’s lithe back, the other around his head, he forced their mouths together, feeding into his primal instinct. Avitus cleared his bar with a sweep of his long arm and pinned Scott down. His hard cock pushed against the silken pajama bottoms he wore. He was uncoordinated, out of control, and hungry. In a frenzy, Avitus clawed at Scott’s body, lightly biting his neck, rolling his hips. He graceless tore the leather pants from the human. Avitus felt helpless, against his struggle between primal instinct to dominate and comfort. He grunted and growled, body rippling, as if he didn’t know what to do, or maybe couldn’t do. Because Scott had control. Complete control. Completely, ensnared. The idea of control aroused Scott in a way he didn’t know was possible. He roughly yanked on Avitus silky pants, setting his majestic cock free. “I want you to fuck me, Avitus.” No holding back, Scott knew what he wanted, he rolled his lithe hips against the turian’s. Avitus growled, his fist came down on the bar, metal dented under the pressure. His muscles convulsed then he shoved Scott’s legs up. He reached for something--to ease things for Scott. He quickly reached across the bar and fished a tube from the wooden box nestled on the corner of the bar. Popping the top, he eased some of the lube on Scott’s now exposed opening. Even with the turian’s natural lubricant it was still going to hurt, but caught up in the excitement, Scott didn’t care. Scott pushed down to open himself when Avitus pushed in his throbbing cock. Scott felt the pain and burn, but the sense of being filled was altogether too much. Scott exposed his neck and cried out, only to have it muffled by a demanding mouth. Avitus assaulted vexatious mouth as he thrust into deeper and deeper. The force of each thrust caused the bar to slam into the wall. Groaning, Scott started to wondered if he started something he couldn’t finish? Trying to match the turain’s pace, had he released an animal he had no control of? When he could escape Avitus’ demanding mouth, he’d bit into the turian’s neck, scraping his blunt nails behind his fringe. Scott’s entire body jerked, changing the angle of thrusts, and the ache of penetration quickly turned into pleasure. Scott shifted his position again with the same pleasurable result. Nuzzling the turian’s face, Scott moaned “ Like that, Avitus. Just like that. Fuck.” The turian growled darkly, keeping the position, delivering stroke after stroke of euphoria. Scott arched back, meeting Avitus’ quick thrust, riding a pleasurable wave. The glorious friction of Avitus’ plates rubbing against his body made him burn hotter. He arched into Avitus’ sharp movements, clasping tighter with his thighs, drawing a deeper roar from the turian. Avitus’ sounds, pushed Scott closer to the edge. He was almost there, when Avitus growled in ear. “Don’t you dare come, Scott.” He ran his large hand between them, cinching Scott’s cock. Scott inhaled sharply, Avitus raised up, thrusts and pistoning his powerful hips. “Fuck, me--damn it let me come.” Scott cried out, grabbing Avitus wrist, fully expecting the turian obey. However, he didn’t let go, pressure built causing Scott some pain. He began to thrash and buck in order to relieve the pressure. “Please-Avitus.” Scott moaned. Avitus fucked the squirming human harder. The turian whispered roughly against the Scott’s ear “You can handle it, Scott.” Groaning, Scott moaned helpless as Avitus continued his pace. Avitus nuzzled Scott’s sweaty neck, inhaling the human’s addictive scent. It had been too long , he was so close, he nudged the neck, his other hand tighten on the human’s lithe hips. Then, Avitus jerked as if caught by surprise of his release. His pounding thrust slowed as he filled Scott. Cum leaked down Scott ample cheeks as he moved in and out with a wet sound. Avitus stopped and pulled out. Scott quickly tugged the turian back, protesting the loss. He whimpered and flailed, but the Avitus held him down with two of his fingers, pressing the his claws into the golden chest. Frustrated tears streamed down Scott’s face. “Don’t worry” Avitus nuzzled and licked the human soft throat. “I’ll let you come.” He slid his rough hand down Scott’s body, wrapping his three fingers around Scott’s angry cock. Avitus, stroke the human slowly, deliberately, nipping the path his hand just traveled. How soft humans were, how exposed, and wanton. The turian let go and all it took was one stroke, one rough lick for Scott to finally lose himself. Avitus, pushed a leathery finger into Scott’s perky ass hitting his prostate, milking him, until his cock was empty. Scott gasped for air, making mindless sounds. He reached out, running the palm of hand against Avitus mandible and brushing soft against his colonial markings. The last of Avitus strength left and all he could do is lay there until he caught his breath. He felt Scott, run his soft fingers over his mandible and face, causing his subharmonics to purr under the affectionate attention. Avitus watched Scott, give a tired crooked smile, struggling to keep his eyes open. “Tomorrow” Avitus growled possessively “You and I need will talk.” He run a claw lightly over Scott’s pouty lips. “I’m in no condition to argue.” Scott mumbled grinning at the attractive turian. “Better, the Fornaz, huh?” Scott chuckled briefly wondering if said it out loud before blackness carried him away. Avitus, flushed again shaking his head. “I’ll give you that much.” He chuckled in the human’s silky fringe. He stood adjusting his silken pajama pants. He gently cradled the human in strong arms, walking over the his large bed. Avitus, placed his precious cargo down, reaching in his nightstand rustled through his belongings finally pulling out lotion. As quietly as he could, he retrieved his softest towel dampened it. Walking back towards the bed, the turian cleaned Scott the best he could before dabbing lotion on his chafed tights. Finally, picked out an oversized shirt, he carefully dressed the man before turning out the lights. Avitus curled against Scott’s warm form, burying his nose in lustrous fringe and covered them with a heavy blanket.
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10636191
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A Hot Mess meets a -Hot-
|
{
"Archive Warning": "No Archive Warnings Apply",
"Category": "Gen",
"Characters": "Male Dovahkiin | Dragonborn, Original Female Character(s)",
"Fandom": "Elder Scrolls V: Skyrim",
"Language": "English",
"Rating": "Teen And Up Audiences",
"author": "by Potato_Being",
"chapters": "1/1",
"completed": "",
"published": "2017-04-15T00:00:00",
"words": "1,104",
"Additional Tags": "Forsworn, Dragons, Swearing",
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"Series": "Dragon Crisis",
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}
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Malen is a mess. It's obvious, but worth stating. She runs into battle, a scavenged Alinor sabre in her hand, and casts destruction magic wildly. Some of the spells she's not even sure of, what they do, where they came from, or why she has them. She just does, words and movements coming to her when necessary.She is fast, strong, everything a Forsworn scout should be. She knows the roads, knows the trails, knows the terrain, and if anyone can cut out a day's travel by climbing over a mountain it's her.When she meets Liam it's because she's working on robbing him. Or killing him. It's a mix of goals.He's knocked to the ground, unable to raise his shield quickly enough. It's a long thin dragon bone one, strapped to his arm, she notes. Not one he holds. She punches him in the face, raising a dagger to stab him, and he looks up at her with both fear and a resignation she doesn't expect a nord to have. It confuses her, and Malen hates being confused."What?" She snaps, dagger still above the nord's neck. "You want to die or something? What the fuck? You sure you're a nord? You sure you're--""Please stop talking. Please just stab me or back off." He says. He sounds dehydrated. Malen is more confused by his attitude. The next thing to happen when she's confused is to then get angry. She snarls at him, spinning the knife to hit him in the face with the pommel and stands up, furious."Why the fuck you ready to die? What the fuck?" she snaps. He just looks tired. She tries to place his age, and all she comes up with is 'old'. His face is lined, deep bags hang under his eyes, and his skin has an almost yellow complexion. He looks sick. "You one of Peryite's people? An Afflicted? Just infected me with some shit? You vomit up green on me I'll skin you alive." He shakes his head. "Okay dipshit. Thanks for the gold, by the way." She takes his coin pouch, shoves it in her belt bag, and then runs for the steep cliffs, climbing them and escaping. She turns to glance back at the nord, who slowly gets to his feet, but doesn't follow her. He continues on the road he had been taking. Malen resists the urge to keep screaming at him, and settles for remembering that he's a nord and nords are weird.She meets the weird nord again when she's hunting a dragon for no other reason than 'it's a dragon and I want to see if I can kill it'. Said dragon is less than enthused about her shooting it with a stolen bow, and tries to burn her alive. It fails, mainly because she's faster than a dragon, and hides in a ruined building. The nord shows up, sword drawn and shield up. He looks a little more lively than before, which isn't saying much. Malen watches eagerly as he swings at the dragon as it lands, and as he slashes open its wing joint it knocks him aside with a vicious head swipe. He flies back ten feet, landing hard, and Malen wonders if his default state is 'on the ground'. He's gasping for air as the dragon approaches him, and Malen has a rare moment of generosity she's sure she'll regret later on as she hits the dragon in the eye with another arrow. The nord struggles to his feet as the dragon screams and heads for Malen's hiding spot, and the nord brings down his sword on the thing's neck five times. The dragon glows and vaporises, and the nord glows. Malen watches as the nord, now obviously one of those 'dragonborn' nords never shut up about, falls to the ground, exhausted. She walks towards him, staring down with annoyance."You're a fucking dragonborn? You're pretty useless." She informs him. He looks up at her on his hands and knees, chest heaving for breath. "Pretty miserable looking. You look like a dog. A beaten dog." He doesn't respond. Malen wonders if he'd fight should she declare him property. He seems docile enough. She decides to wait on that option, for now just mocking him. "So what? You no longer able to talk? Got a name?""Liam." He croaks out. Still dehydrated. So the dragonborn is probably going to die of thirst shortly. Malen's not a nord, and she's by no means religious, but she's heard nords talking about the end times, and that big black dragon that destroyed Helgen? Apparently Alduin, ready to destroy the world. So Malen decides to keep that from happening. Namely by making sure this wreck of a dragonborn doesn't die before he's supposed to. She grabs him, wrapping her arms under his shoulders, and hauls him towards the cliff wall, dropping him to the ground."What are you doing?" Liam asks."Keeping the world alive, dumbass." Malen replies, and forces water down his throat. He chokes on it, staring at her with more fear than anything else, and when she hands him bread he looks incredulous."Why?""Keeping the world alive. You're on your last legs, probably gonna die. You die, and we all die.""What are you talking about?" He looks confused. She stares at him."You just absorbed a whole dragon.""That's what dragons do.""No they fucking don't." Malen tells him."I'm not… I'm not responsible for an entire province, what are you talking about?""You're a nord, right? Just absorbed a dragon, right? You're wandering around while there's a big World-Eater destroying shit, right?" Liam looks more confused as she talks. "You're the fucking Dragonborn, dipshit." Liam is stunned."How did you get to that conclusion?""Because apparently I'm not an idiot, unlike some people." Malen snaps. "Why the fuck you up here fighting a dragon if you're not dragonborn?""It's hurting people. Or was. Hurting people. It's my job. I protect people.""Oh boy, you're one of those." Malen says flatly."One of what?""A do-gooder. A knight. A paragon of virtue. Bet you refuse coin as well.""No one has much.""Yeah, thought that'd be your answer. Look asshole, you're the fucking dragonborn, and you're going to figure out how to stop this dragon nonsense before more people die. Got it?" Malen asks. Liam nods. "Good. I'm going with you, by the way. Since you apparently can't take care of yourself. Got that?" another nod. "Eat your fucking bread." Malen orders, and steps away from him, wondering what she's thrown herself into.
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10681143
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My Hero
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{
"Archive Warning": "No Archive Warnings Apply",
"Category": "F/M",
"Characters": "Saitama (One-Punch Man), Genos (One-Punch Man), Higurashi Kagome",
"Fandom": null,
"Language": "English",
"Rating": "Mature",
"author": "by TheAmazingSakumachan",
"chapters": "1/1",
"completed": "",
"published": "2017-04-20T00:00:00",
"words": "61,917",
"Additional Tags": "Implicit Sexual References, One Night Stands, Fluff, Tsundere, Love Triangle, Unrequited Love",
"Relationship": null,
"Character": null,
"Relationships": "Saitama/Kagome, Genos (One-Punch Man)/Higurashi Kagome, Genos/Kagome, Saitama/Higurashi Kagome",
"Series": null,
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"Fandoms": "InuYasha - A Feudal Fairy Tale, ワンパンマン | One-Punch Man",
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Genos was almost speechless from the anticipation that was hidden behind his stony, amber eyes at the sheer number of letters inside of the huge, box that was airmailed from the Hero's Association. Saitama whistled to express that he was rather impressed. "Wow," the older of the two young men's tone did not change from its usual casual as he commented at the small mountain of fan mail, "that's quite the haul this time."
The cyborg gave a curt nod as he began to sort and sift through them, "You are right." He replied as he meticulously created two separate piles: one for him and one for mentor. "But we both have much more active lately so it is to be expected."
Although he did not get his hopes up, Saitama smiled a bit and asked with a small hint of excitement to his voice, "Hey, any for me this time?" Although the letters were numerous, Genos' spectacular reading ability made the sorting job simpler and quicker than any human would be able to.
"There is one, sensei," Genos replied as he turned away from his pile of fan mail to hand his mentor the one piece of mail that was addressed to him.
"Thanks, dude," Saitama said graciously as he accepted and gazed down at his letter with a bit of fascination.
Genos was as anxious as his mentor to find out the contents of the letter, so much that he paid his own mail no mind for the time being. He was on edge from remembering a time not long ago when his sensei received a terrible, angry letter that accused him of being a "cheater". If need be, Genos was ready to incinerate the letter if its contents were of the unsavory kind.
For a few moments, the two of them remained silent and motionless. Genos sat by his mound of mail and stared up at his master, who stared at the letter wordlessly. A small bead of sweat ran down the cyborg's face, "uh…Sensei? Are you going to open it?"
Saitama's hardened expression then softened up to his usually goofy one as he placed his hand behind his hand like a skittish boy, "Well…" He admitted with a small, almost embarrassed smile. "I don't know if I can."
His mentor's reply instantly put the cyborg on edge as he jumped to his feet, "Why is that?! Do you believe the letter to be of ill intent?! I will dispose of it im-"
Saitama then held his hand defensively at his disciple, "Cool it, Genos," He did not like the blonde's hands were already burning hot, ready to fire and surely blast a huge gaping hole into his apartment. "It's not like that at all, " Saitama explained a smile reappearing on his face when Genos visibly calmed down and lowered his offenses. "This letter-" The self-proclaimed hero-for-fun then held up the letter to Genos' face and elaborated, "-is obviously from a girl," he finished calmly.
"Huh?" Genos blinked, almost is bewilderment, "A girl, you say?" The cyborg then examined the letter closely. It was encased in a lovely, feminine pink envelope with a lilac-colored floral design at the edges. The flap was sealed shut by bright-red, heart-shaped sticker. "I see…" He felt relief from knowing that but that relief was instantly followed by confusion. "But sensei, why would you not want to open a letter for such a reason? Do you prefer me-?"
Saitama stared at Genos blankly and interjected with a deadpanned tone," Don't even joke about that, dude." His expression then turned to normal as he explained, "This is my first and probably last letter from a fangirl. It feels like I should cherish it by never opening it." The bald hero then silently wondered if he should encase the letter in its own mini-shrine.
Genos sweat dropped," But sensei…I'm sure that if she is a fan now, she will continue to write you letters…"
Something visibly clicked inside of Saitama's head, "you're right! I'll read it then!"
Genos faithfully sat down in front of his mentor and bowed his head," please read it aloud, sensei!"
Saitama nodded as he peeled the sticker from the envelope's flap, flipped it open, and finally freed the letter from its encasement. "Here goes… Dear Chrome Dome-" Genos lifted his head and gasped as Saitama's eyes lit up angrily and his other free hand formed a fist, "WHAT KIND OF FANGIRL IS THIS?!"
"Sensei, you must calm down or you'll ruin your first fan letter!"
"You're right…" Saitama replied through gritted teeth as he glared down at the letter and continued to read in a hissing voice, "I mean, Saitama-sama…" his expression instantly returned to normal when it realized that the bald insult was a joke. "You probably don't remember me but it's me: Kagome." Both heroes froze at the mention of the sender's name.
After a few moments of silence, Genos finally asked his mentor, "aren't you going to read her letter, Sensei?"
The bald hero's face turned into a blank, almost incredulous expression, "She could have just told me in person."
Genos rubbed his chin thoughtfully and speculated aloud, "Perhaps she has something on her mind that she cannot say to you in person."
"This is Kagome we're talkin' about, right?" he asked before continuing, "She talks to me almost as much as you do. This is probably another prank of hers," he concluded dismissively, but while smiling fondly at the thought of her. The hero soon turned his attention back to the sheet of parchment in his hand. "You must be wondering why I'm writing to you," he read the next sentence. Ah. She hit the nail on the head without even being in the room. "Well, I've wanted to tell you something very important for a while now. We never seem to speak to each other properly for long and this is much easier for me than to face you in person… You see, it all started that day at the café…"
And this Saitama read the letter aloud and allowed its contents to take him and Genos on a trip to the recent past…
________________________________________
Kagome sighed as she leaned against a shining, wooden counter. Her eyes were glazed over as she stared out at of large, glass windows with boredom. It was 1:00PM on a Wednesday and most people were still in classes or at work. Meanwhile, here she was, working the mid-day shift at a small cafe in the middle of downtown City Z. She was like the other young women who ran the grunt work of the establishment. They were all college students who needed some employment for tuition and other essentials. The job paid well for being an entry-level one. Her shifts were also tailored around her class schedule.
The only two problems were how boring it could get during slow hours and…
The familiar bell jingles of a customer entering the premises caught her and the rest of her colleague's attentions. She and the other young women exchanged challengingly glance for a brief moment. All of them were bored of out their minds and looked ready to duke it out for the opportunity to have something to do.
However, Kagome was the quickest and beat the rest of the crew to the punch as she jumped over the counter to meet and greet their first customer in forty-four minutes. Kagome smiled brightly as she approached the door and coyly straightened her frilly, white apron. "Welcome, my Masters~" She giggled in voice so high and a manner so cutesy that the inner-Kagome inside of her head was bawling from embarrassment. "Table for-?"
That was when she opened her eyes and noted how the customer were actually a pair of customers. Odd ones. One was a blonde, rather handsome cyborg while the other was a man clad in a ridiculous, yellow body suit. "two…?" She finished, her cutesy tone broke into one of uncertainty as the older man gave her a deadpan stare.
"That's cringey," he stated bluntly before turning to his company. "Genos, why would you bring me here?!"
The cyborg replied earnestly, "My apologies, sensei. I assume that treating you to a maid café would be to your liking since you seem to enjoy mang-"
The yellow clad man then pointed directly at Kagome, to which she blinked as he shouted," Just because I like manga doesn't mean that I'm a pervert who likes things like this!" The young woman was dressed in traditionally black-and-white themed French maid uniform with the main dress being black and the white frilly hem of her petticoat reaching her mid-thighs. The black dress was complemented by shiny black dress shoes, white lacy stockings, and an intricately crafted headdress on top of the black crown of her head. Everything about the woman screamed moe and for Saitama, it was way over the top.
That struck a nerve in the young woman. It was her turn for her eyes to be set ablaze. She swatted his finger away, causing the two men to turn their attention fully to her. The indignant maid then stood within less than a centimeter away from the offending man. She glared up at his fiercely and was not daunted by their height difference. "Even if you're not into moe, you have no right to be so rude about it!" She lectured him.
"Say what now?" The manga fan asked blankly, wondering why this woman was seething at him.
Normally anyone who dared to challenge his sensei would be met by Genos' protectiveness as his loyal disciple, but this small woman was an exception. There was something unintimidating about a beautiful young woman in a maid outfit-. But it could have been anything from her youthful face to her feminine curves…or her lack of height.
Kagome visibly looked the man up and down. He was clad a tight, bright yellow body suit complete with red boots, gloves, a cape, and even some sort of special belt with a buckle. "Hmph," She huffed while continuing to glare, "You claim to not be a pervert but you walk around in public wearing that getup?" She asked pointedly. "I may be a cringey maid but at least I still have decency," she crossed her arms over chest and added, "baldy."
A vein appeared on the man's forehead and Kagome smiled cattishly, satisfied that she struck a nerve. Then suddenly, it felt like time had stood completely still for her when she noticed how the man's perfectly bald head reflected the afternoon sunlight like a mirror. 'That head… It feels like I've seen it somewhere before' she thought to herself. But before any more words could be exchanged, the ground began to shake and her colleagues began to scream in terror.
Kagome too squeaked when she lost her footing and fell to her butt unceremoniously. "What's going on here?!" She shouted over the booming and screaming of her colleagues as they ran out of the lobby and back towards the employee lounge.
"Sensei," The blonde cyborg stated in a grave tone. "I detect a high-level energy just outside this establishment."
The "sensei" nodded as he looked at his comrade while re-adjusting and tightening his red gloves, "Right. Let's take it out then find some real food."
Kagome glowered at the man from her spot on the floor, "Are you implying that our food isn't real?!" The young woman briefly forgot that something possibly dangerous was about to occur. She could not stand this man who was casually insulting her and her workplace. Sure, it was an embarrassing job but she came to love it because of the friendships that she formed with her fellow maids, her manager, and even the regular customers.
"Oh, you're still?" The yellow-clad baldly asked curiously as he turned to look at her fallen form. "It'll probably get dangerous so you should find somewhere to hide and be safe, "he told her calmly.
Kagome blinked, taken aback by the man's sudden change in tone and attitude. She stared speechlessly as the two men exited through the front of the building to face to incoming danger head on. "What's with those two…?" She wondered aloud to no one in particular.
(Outside)
Saitama and Genos stared blankly at the creature who appeared before them several meters away from the maid café. "You've…got to be kidding me," Saitama said blankly.
"It would seem that there are all sorts of monsters in this world, sensei."
It was fuzzy, gray, and the size of a kitten.
Actually, it was a kitten.
The monster flew from the sky and landed gracefully in front of them on all-fours was a small, gray, and green-eyed kitten. "It's a cat," Saitama said in half bored, half disappointed tone as they watched it lick one of its paw then seemingly groom the hair on top of its head.
"This cat is the source of the high level of energy though, "Genos pointed out, his face remaining serious and cold as he stared the creature down and awaited its attack.
That was when the kitten stopped grooming itself and looked directly at them, "that is correct." It said in a ridiculously high-pitched, cute voice. "I am no ordinary kitten!" It announced as it stood on its hind legs. "I am-!"
The creature's self-introduction was interrupted by a girlish coo and a cry of, "so adorable~!"
"What?!" Genos asked as he and Saitama turned around to see the spit-fire maid from earlier standing a couple of meters away from them, her eyes visibly sparkling and her cheeks flushed in admiration for the cute creature. "She did not evacuate like you suggested, sensei!"
"Ehhh…" Saitama said boredly while picking his nose and looking back at the "threat".
"Ahem…" the kitten cleared its throat and continued to announce its presence, "as I was saying, I am Bad Kitty! A monster born from the regrets of a manga-loving, socially reclusive geek who never lost his virginity!"
The brilliance in Kagome's eyes dulled as she asked sharply and looked at Saitama, "So you birthed this cat?"
"Hey, don't lump me in the same category as hat thing!" Was his protest as he turned his full attention back to the young woman who stared at his pointedly, as if the entire situation was his fault. The bickering trio was unaware of how the now-angry cat creature was slowly growing in size behind them until it overshadowed them completely. The three of them turned around and looked up at the creature that was easily the size of skyscraper. Its cutesy façade seemed to have melted away as its muzzle extended and jutted out large canines and fangs. Its tiny paws were now adorned by claws the length of a street sign and as thick as a car.
"STOP INTERRUPTING!" The creature roared furiously, "I AM BAD KITTY! AND I AM HERE TO (BEEP) GORGEOUS MAAAAAAAADS!"
"Oh," Saitama said casually as he turned to smile at Kagome. "That's not so bad. Is he your type?"
Kagome growled and shook her fist at the hero, "as if, PERVERT!"
"YOU DARE IGNORE ME?!" Bad Kitty raged as he quickly swatted at them, his paw moving much quicker than what one would guess from his massive size. Genos and Saitama easily scattered and dodged the attack with the maid in the latter's arms.
Saitama simply landed on top of a car with the maid in his arms, not caring too much that he muddied the sheen of its obvious recent wax job. "Here," he stated while easily setting the young woman down on her feet with one hand. She stared up at him with a dumbstruck expression and her lips ajar in awe. "You…saved me…" She pointed out.
"Of course, it's my job. He replied calmly. "I'm a hero for fun after all."
Kagome gasped softly and her eyes widened as the reason for this man's odd state of dress dawned upon, "I see… Well, thank you." She said in a small smile. Saitama blinked as he stared at her for a moment, wondering if her change in demeanor was because she found out that he was a hero.
"Hey, Genos!" The bald hero called over to his disciple. "You mind taking care of this one for me?" He asked before gesturing to the maid still standing by his side, despite the imminent danger surrounding her. "This one needs babysitting."
The blonde merely nodded and made a mad dash at the monstrous creature. Genos could tell by the look on Saitama's face that the man was not excited about this monster's presence and did not want to bother wasting time on it. Even though he was using the young woman as an excuse, this disciple saw right through his sensei's façade. Genos nodded to himself, finally, it was time to show his sensei and the world what he was made of!
"Stand back, meido-san!" The cyborg shouted as he jumped in front of the cat creature to face it head on. He began to charge a massive amount of fire power," I will incinerate this-!"
Before the enthused young man could complete his sentence, the giant cat creature flicked him away like an insect and bellowed at the sight of his metallic body crashing into the maid café not too far away. "You talk too much!"
While Saitama did not look fazed or concerned for his comrade, the young maid openly did, "Oh no! He's been hurt!" she cried out as she run from his side and towards the direction of Genos' crash landing.
"Oh boy…" Saitama mumbled when he saw the cat creature's sight turn to the maid who was running adjacent to him. "This one really does need babysitting." The yellow-suited hero then picked at and groomed his ear with a pinky.
"Ahaha…" The creature bellowed as he bent down to peer inside of the huge gaping hole in the maid café. "You should be more concerned about yourself, girly…" The creature taunted as he spotted the petite woman kneeled beside a pile of rubble that buried Genos alive.
Despite her fears, Kagome ignored the cackling monster as she threw brick up on brick aside until she unearthed the cyborg. "Hey, are you okay?" She asked with horror etched as clear as day across her face when she discovered the cyborg to be still alive but cracked and broken here and there.
His eyes flickered but he opened them nonetheless, "You shouldn't be here…" He told as he attempted to sit up and regain his composure. "It's too dangerous for a civilian."
Kagome frowned as she wrapped his arm around her shoulder and told him with determination in her voice, "civilian or not, I'm here to rescue you!"
The blonde shook his head,"I am an S-rank class hero. It is my duty to protec-"
Kagome glared at him, "Listen, buddy. It doesn't matter who registered as a hero or not in situations like this. People are supposed to help other!"
Getting his head bitten off by the young woman seemed to have quieted down but the peace did not last long. As soon as she turned them around to escape, she came face-to-face with a gigantic claw. "Down!" She called as she pushed Genos to the floor and dove on top of him protectively. The blonde's eyes widened as his face was stuffed full of her ample, soft breasts. Too afraid to move from her current position and not knowing what to do next, Kagome laid there on top of her charge. This would have been the perfect time for them to be rescued by that yellow hero guy. "Jeez, where is that Sensei Baldy when you need-?!"
Before she could complete her sentence, a loud sonic boom was heard from outside, followed by the sound of shower of squishy organs and blood raining down from the sky. "I'm guessing…we're saved…?" Kagome asked Genos but she paid him no mind since her attention was focused on the lanky figure who casually waltzed through the hole in the maid café. Kagome glared at him," you're slow."
Saitama blinked when he saw the compromising position that Genos and Kagome were in. The maid was completely straddling the cyborg with her huge breasts smothering his face. "And you're fast," the bald hero replied nonchalantly.
"What…?" Kagome blinked and cocked her head to the side for a moment, unsure of what he meant by that until she looked down and realized what she was doing… She shrieked as her face instantly turned bright red and she jumped to her feet, "I-It's not like that, you shameless pervert!" She exclaimed while waving her hands around frantically, "I was protecting him!"
"Right…" Saitama replied before looking down at the cyborg who laid down scarily still and stiff on the floor, "Genos, buddy, you still alive? Did her boobs suffocate you?"
"You really are a pervert!"
He ignored the young woman's accusation as he peered over and down at Genos' face. He was indeed alive and breathing. However, something was clearly off about him as his eyes were wider than usual and his mouth was ajar. An unusual expression of shock seemed permanently plastered on his face. "Did you blow a gasket or something?" Saitama asked curiously.
The cyborg suddenly blinked and was brought back to reality. He sat up and stated seriously, "Once again, my life has been saved by you, Saitama-sensei." He then turned his gaze upon the maid who was staring at him as worriedly as his sensei was. "And to you, meido-san, who risked her life to-"
Kagome sighed and cut in, "Sorry to interrupt but my name is Kagome, not meido-san. Use that."
Genos looked a bit taken aback and then nodded as he finished," Kagome-san, you risked your life to protect my own. Thank you."
Saitama then scratched his cheek, "That's nice and all but can we go now? I'm starving."
To Kagome's surprise, the cracked and broken cyborg got to his feet and dusted off his pants. "Yes, sensei," he replied dutifully, like a loyal dog. She guessed that he really did not need her help after all. She gasped sharply when the duo turned to leave.
"HOLD IT!" She screamed as she desperately grabbed onto Saitama's cape to hold him back.
The hero blinked as they turned and looked at her. "What now?" He asked. Of course. she was not strong enough to really hold him against his will but he was just the type of guy who rolled with it.
Kagome hardened her expression and prayed that her face did not betray how she felt inside and portray her thoughts. "You can't leave yet!" She told him. "You need to help me repair the damages caused here!" She explained in a shaky, desperate tone.
"Uhhh… Put it on my tab?" Saitama asked.
"We don't do that here!"
"Okay, goodbye!" He replied quickly as he turned away again, only to find that the woman tightened her grip on his cape.
"You're not going anywhere!" Kagome huffed and gave his cape a yank, though it did not budge him in the slightest.
The pang of hunger in his stomach meant that enough was enough.
"Cut it out, we're busy!"
"Please, Kagome-san," Genos began, trying to play mediator between the two. Never before had he seen anyone get under his sensei's skin so much in one sitting. This woman seemed more interactive with him than any other civilian. "My sensei is a very busy man-"
"There's something that I need to talk to you about though!" Kagome insisted while giving the cape another tug.
"Okay," within the blink of an eye Saitama turned around and had his hands on the hem of Kagome's apron. "Let's see how you like it." The superhuman hero gave the frail piece of cloth a tug. His state of annoyance seemed to have made him forget to hold back more because what he thought was a small tug had enough force to rip and tear off every piece of clothing that the young woman had one that day. "Oops," his face returned to normal as the air grew quiet.
The young woman was left standing as in nothing but her black shoes and white maid headband. Her breath hitched in her throat as her brain struggled to keep up with the sensation that her body felt and the blurs that her eyes missed. It took four whole seconds her to register what had just happened…
Kagome screamed and curled into a protective ball to save her decency, though it was far too late for her to save face with the two men who had seen her everything. "Y-You bastards! STOP LOOKING!" She seethed when she noticed that neither men tore their eyes away from her form.
It was only then that Genos' faces flushed as he was brought back to reality and he covered his eyes, "I-I'm sorry, Kagome-san!"
"Yeah, "Saitama added in a tone that did not sound sorry at all. It was a tone so casual that it felt uncaring. "My bad," he added.
"Your BAD?!" Kagome seethed as she scooched herself into a corner when she spotted a crowd of nosy people beginning to form outside. "How am I supposed to go home like THIS?!" Her face was incredibly flushed as opposed to her lightly tanned skin. Her cheeks were puffed full of hot air as she pouted and glared at the man who seemed to infuriate her so.
"Uhhh..." Saitama looked up at the ceiling for a moment before, "Good question," he commented.
"Sensei," Genos began while making sure to avoid both Saitama's and Kagome's eyes, "We must do something. It would be very problematic if a young woman were to travel around in such a state."
For a moment, the young woman squeezed her eyes shut and covered her ears, as if being unable to see and hear the two men would shut out the reality of the situation. It was an embarrassingly and unbelievable reality that she thought only happened in the ecchi anime that she sometimes found herself watching. 'This isn't happening. This isn't happening. This isn- Huh?' Her inner mantra was cut short by the sound of unbuckling, cloth flapping, and then the feeling of being covered in something soft.
Her blue eyes shot open and she was surprised to find that she could not see the background of the café. It was nothing but a white cloth surrounding her. It was like being in bed, sitting beneath her cozy blankets. Kagome then shook her head and nuzzled her way out of the white depths. It was then that she found herself staring up at a cape-less Saitama.
"You can borrow this," he concluded with a small smile and a surprisingly gentle pat to her head.
Despite the hero's smile, Kagome frowned in return but accepted the offering. She hugged it tightly around her form like a curtain to hide her naked body from the world. She was so embarrassed that she felt like she was going to die right then and there. The young woman glared at the bald man whose face showed no remorse for shredding her uniform and leaving her in the nude in public. She pulled the cape closer and allowed the lower part of her face to sink into its depths.
________________________________________
"kind of nice" Saitama read the line casually, despite how intimate it was. "I didn't realize it back then but the scent of your cape made me feel so relaxed. It was a manly mixture of sweat, musk, battle, and you."
Genos perked up at the description that she wrote of his sensei's cape. 'Manly scent… It is pheromones that attracts Kagome to sensei so…' he opened his notebook and began taking notes. He inwardly concluded that he would need to work hard to become as worthy of a man as his sensei was!
"I know that it sounds weird but…" Saitama paused in his reading to criticize the writer. "If she knows that it sounds weird, then why write it?"
Genos then placed his pen down onto the table and looked at his sensei, "It is because Kagome wants to share everything with you."
Part of the reason why I was so angry is because everything you did that made me feel so flustered.
From insulting my job to saving my life to ripping my clothes parts…I wasn't expecting any of it.
You took me by surprise in a few minutes more than anyone else has in a long time.
Honestly, I didn't know what to say, how to feel, or how to react, especially when...
...you didn't seem to recognize me at all.
________________________________________
"Eh?" Kagome blinked as another blush spread across her cheeks, "You're taking me home too?!" She could not believe this guy! He had crossed so many lines with her today and now he thought that she would let him walk her home?!
"I mean, even I would feel bad if I made a naked girl walk home alone," the bald hero explained with a small wave of his hand to emphasize his words.
Genos nodded in agreement, finally ready to face the pair after he recollected his composure, "Kagome-san, Saitama-sensei is a great hero and could not live with himself if he did not see you home safely," he assured her with a balled up, iron fist that showed his vigor for praising his mentor.
Kagome sweat dropped then gave Saitama a sideways glance of suspicion, "Is that true?"
The interrogated then laughed awkwardly while scratching the back of his head, "Actually, I wanted to make sure that you give my cape back~" he admitted shamelessly.
{SLAP!}
Kagome stomped out of the café while clutching the cape close to her body and nearly breathing fire like a raging dragon. Her eye twitched with agitation at the thought of Genos getting her hopes up before getting let down by Saitama.
The blonde cyborg outstretched his hand towards the young woman and called out, "Kagome-san!"
She then growled and glared over her shoulder at the duo, "I'LL WALK MYSELF HOME, YOU JERKS!"
For some reason, Genos found himself almost flinching at the insult directed at him. "I am…a jerk…?" He wondered beneath his breath. "Sensei, do you think that I-?" The cyborg blink before he noticed that this mentor was already down the block, walking not too far behind the seething young woman. "Ah, so sensei insists on seeing her home safely," he concluded. Before he had the chance to even consider joining them, an idea popped into his head and he quickly spun on his heels.
There on the tile floor laid Kagome's maid uniform that was ripped into several pieces. The cyborg stooped over and collected each piece one by one, examining each of them closely before picking up the other. "They are salvageable," he told himself.
________________________________________
The two of them walked in silence with the woman walking a meter in front of the man. She kept her head down to avoid showing her face to the passersby who openly gawked and whispered to each other about how odd the two of them looked. One was a young woman wrapped in a white covering scattered, displaced maid costume accessories; the other was a man in yellow body suit and random heroic accessories. 'When is he going to stop following me?' Kagome thought begrudgingly, pouting internally and externally as she fought that urge to turn around and confront him head on. 'Shouldn't a hero have better things to do?!'
Little did she know, the laidback hero who trailed behind her with his arms folded coolly behind his head was only thinking of what he should have for dinner tonight. He had no clue how far the woman lived from her work place but he hoped that it was not too much further.
Oh.
That gave him an idea.
Kagome shrieked when she suddenly felt her feet lift off the ground, followed by the rest of her body. "H-Hey!" She cried as in one, swift movement, she was bounced from Saitama's hip to on top of his back. Despite her protest, she instinctively rested her hands on his shoulders. "What do you think you're doing now, Mister?!"
Without turning to meet her gaze, which was most likely intense from the anger that she seemed to frequently suffer from, he replied while cupping his hands beneath her bottom. "Getting you home will be faster this way."
"Hmph," Kagome huffed and looked away from him, even though he was not even looking at her. "You just want an excuse to touch me~" she half joked and half excused.
"Even if that were true, it's not like you're protesting that much," he pointed out nonchalantly before changing the subject, "So…where to?"
Kagome found herself feeling dazed and dizzy from the ride home. It literally went by in a blur and what usually was a forty-five-minute walk (one that she took to and from work to save money on transportation expenses) turned into a two-minute run. She shakily climbed off Saitama's back to unlock the door to her quaint campus apartment. She kept the key in her shoe at work.
"Well…this is it…" She informed him while staring up at the man with a small blush on her cheeks.
"But…this is a college apartment, isn't it?" He asked while following her inside without bothering asking for permission. He at least had the decency to remove his boots and left them by hers at the doorway.
Kagome then stopped just short of entering her bedroom and asked back, "yeah, so what?"
"…aren't you a high school girl?"
"I'M TWENTY-ONE, YOU IDIOT!" She roared indignantly.
"Oh." Was his curt reply, he was already used to her dangerously short temper. "What a baby-face."
Kagome's expression then lit up before she batted her eyelashes cutely, "Glad you think so, Master~"
This instantly caused Saitama's own face to go sour, "So cringe-worthy…"
The maid huffed as she dropped her cutesy persona, "Jeez, you're so hard to please. Glad you're not a regular."
Saitama then smiled and commented," I don't see how anyone could be turned on by that kind of act-" Kagome's cheeks instantly puffed with hot air. "You're actually a lot cuter when you're angry than when you act like that," he admitted with a friendly smile that caught Kagome off guard.
Despite inwardly feeling happy that someone preferred a more realistic side of her to the act that she and her colleagues had to put on for the sake of the café's theme, Kagome attempted to glare at Saitama and asked, "Is that supposed to make me happy?"
"Ah? It doesn't?" The hero asked in confused tone as he blinked at her.
"No! What makes you think that?!" She huffed before retreating into her bedroom to get changed.
'What a weird girl…' He thought to himself as he stood awkwardly in her small living/dining room. 'She smiled at me for the first time today, but claimed not to be happy.' The hero soon found himself rather bored while waiting for the woman to change out of his cape and into normal clothing. Her apartment really left nothing to look at. It was even blander than his, despite being a bit bigger.
There were no photographs of family or friends hanging on the walls. There was no television for entertainment. There were not even any books, besides some a slightly disheveled stack of college textbooks sitting on top of her kotatsu. All in all, the lack of personalization to the space made it give off an almost melancholic vibe.
"Sorry for the wait," Kagome said as she emerged from her room wearing a simple heather-gray T-Shirt and a pair of faded blue jeans. "It took a while to find these," she said as she walked up to the hero with his cape folded neatly within her arms.
"You took a long time…just to find that?" He asked while arching an eyebrow and staring down at her as she stood up on her tippy-toes to re-buckle his cape to his shoulders. From the few seconds that her body was pressed against his, he could smell a light scent of some sort of flower.
He expected her to snap at him again but instead she laughed lightly and explained before backing away from him with an almost coy smile on her face, "Well, yeah…" she began while placing her hands behind her back and cupping them. Saitama noted how the woman's natural self really was much cuter than her maid façade. "I'm going back to work to see if I can clean it up a bit," she explained. "No one wants to do such dirty work in their nice clothes." 'Should I…ask him…?' she wondered inwardly, not noticing that the man bade her goodbye with a simple "See ya" and wave over his shoulder. It took a moment but she finally gathered up her courage and nodded to herself, 'I'll do it!'
Kagome then turned around to face the hero, "Would you like to-…?" Seeing that she was alone in the apartment with her door left wide open. "…that guy…" She sighed.
You suddenly took off without me noticing.
I didn't get the chance to tell you what I wanted to back at the café.
________________________________________
Even though work had been scheduled for the day after the disaster, Kagome was informed that she did not have to go in since owner was still arranging how to go about rebuilding and repairing the damage done. Still, she found herself showing up at her workplace with a broom, dust pan, and a box of heavy duty trash bags. It was not that she enjoyed cleaning for free but she honestly had nothing else better to do, besides study. And with the events of yesterday pressing so hard on her mind, studying was not an option. She needed something to keep her mind numb and her hands busy.
So there she was, sweeping up dusty and rubble in the warmth of another quiet afternoon all alone. Her colleagues who fled the scene as soon as danger seemed to approach had no clue what transpired or what even attacked them. They felt no obligation to show up and help clean. Last night she received an onslaught of phone calls and texts from worried coworkers, asking if she had escaped the café in one piece since she did not flee with them. Even though she was working for free and working alone, Kagome still found herself grateful that her fellow maids did leave as soon as the going got rough. 'The last thing that I need is for one of them to have been saved by Saitama too…' she thought absent-mindedly.
The young woman was snapped from her thoughts at the sound of someone's foot stepping on and cracking some of the shattered glass on the ground. She turned around with her broom in hand and was actually quite surprised to find that it was none other than the blonde cyborg from the day before. "Oh, it's you, " she surmised, "What's up? Did you forget something?" She inquired as he approached her quietly with an almost intimidating, stony look on his face.
"No, I did not," he responded before stopping right in front of her. "But you did," he added while presenting her with a small, cardboard box. Kagome looked unsure for a moment but reluctantly accepted the box from it. He nodded to her to open it and she nodded back before slowly lifting the lid.
"Oh… Is this…?" She whispered as she stared down at what appeared to be her maid uniform for work. She sat the box down on the floor before raising the uniform up to look at it in its entirety. "My uniform?" She asked while looking at the cyborg, utterly confused about how he could have gotten her a new uniform when they had to be custom-made by their company's supplier.
"I took the liberties of repairing it for you as thanks for protecting me, "Genos told her as he watched her examine and awe at his handiwork. "I hope it is to your liking, Kagome-san!" He exclaimed while giving her a deep but formal bow at his waist with his arms stiffly at his sides.
To his surprise, the young woman laughed blissfully and nearly tackled him as she threw her arms around his neck in an appreciative embrace. "Thanks a bunch, Genos!" She chirped before pulling away to smile up at him sweetly.
The cyborg ignored the odd feeling that he felt in his chest when he saw her smiling face. Somehow, it felt like she was glowing when she looked at him so fondly. "It is the least that I could do…" he insisted before tearing his gaze away from her. It felt as if he continued to look at her, he would find himself caught in a sort of hypnotic trace.
"No really~" She added as her smile got wider and her eyes began to sparkle, "I was so angry yesterday because the company charges us for replacement uniforms!" She finally looked away from the cyborg to admire her newly repaired maid costume, "but this looks as good as new! I'm so impressed that you're so skilled at sewing!"
Genos then nodded as he looked around the café and assessed the damage that was done to the place, "Do you need assistance in cleaning? I see that you are working alone."
Kagome smiled and shook her head from side to side, "Nah, don't worry about it~ I only came here because I needed something to do." She placed her broom against a table and clapped her hands together, "but now that you're here, I'm not completely alone! Wanna do something?" She asked hopefully while staring up at Genos with wavering, puppy-like eyes.
Genos rubbed his chin for a moment and looked thoughtful, "Well…I do need go grocery shopping for sensei and I. We are lowing short on-"
Kagome gasped and jumped closer to him, almost nose-to-nose as she stared into his eyes with fists balled up near her chest, "You mean that you two live together?!" she asked in an overly shocked manner.
The thoughtful expression on Genos' face changed back to his usual stoic one, "We do. It is more convenient for me to learn under sensei that way."
Kagome's face then changed to a slightly pouty one as she sighed, "How nice…~" She gave a small, wistful smile before adding, "I'm a bit jealous~" before laughing at herself to disperse what could have turned into a depressing atmosphere.
Being as straightforward as he was, the cyborg did not hesitate to ask out of sheer curiosity, "Are you jealous that I am living with Saitama-sensei?" The blonde's amber eyes readily connected to woman's blue eyes as he searched for an answer within the windows of her soul.
However, as soon as their eyes met, Kagome's retreated to the side as her cheeks flushed, "Don't be ridiculous!" She said defensively, "It's just that I don't have a roommate living with me anymore!" She explained as she looked at the ground. "Sometimes, it gets a little lonely, that's all!" She added with giving him a half-hearted glare. Honestly, it was much easier to glare at Saitama than Genos. The cyborg felt more genuine and curious, like a puppy discovering the world for the first time.
"I see," the cyborg replied while looking thoughtful once more. "Shall I ask if you can move in wit-?"
"No-THANK YOU!" Kagome interjected while placing a hand up. "Let's just get out of here, okay?" She changed the subject immediately. The last thing she needed weighing on her mind was the thought of living with the two extremely attractive heroes.
Genos nodded, willing to follow her lead just as quickly as he would his mentors, "Sure, let's. But let us depart for our apartment first, I need to do inventory of our current food stock."
Kagome nodded and laughed lightly as she latched onto his arm in a chummy manner, unintentionally brushing her breasts against his exposed synthetic skin. She felt him stiffened a bit and waved her hand dismissively, "Come on now, Genos~ You don't have to be formal with me~" she told him sweetly, "I just call you Genos without an honorific after all so just relax~ We're friends, aren't we?"
Their walk back to Saitama's and Genos' apartment was a pleasant and most comfortable one. The duo found themselves feeling more natural around each other than expected. For the first time in a long time, Kagome felt like she had a friend who she could laugh freely with. And for the first time in a long time, Genos felt like he was an ordinary human being. Their conversation most consisted of Kagome asking her new friend a question and him replying with a long, convoluted answer. The cyborg had quite the motor mouth, especially about Saitama, whom he adored and his past. But Kagome did not mind the chatter one bit; it was nice to have someone to talk with outside of work after all.
The young woman found then began to notice that the two of them were leaving the "safe" side of the city and venturing deeper and deeper in a sector that she and no one who she knew before yesterday dared to go… It was a borderline slum with trash about, dark alleys, and many uninhabited homes. "Ehh…" Kagome laughed nervously, "Genos…do you two really live here?" She asked unsurely, being in this area of the city made her feel a bit uneasy, despite being with a hero. Her senses were tugging at her, telling her that something sinister was lurking about somewhere not far.
Genos merely nodded and continued his long story about how he came to live with Saitama as he led her up the black, iron stairway to the front door. Kagome noted how he opened the door without unlocking it with a key and called as they stepped in, "Sensei, I brought a guest over!"
Kagome felt a bit nervous being in the bald hero's home but curiously peeked from behind Genos' taller form nonetheless, "Hello, hello~ Look who's here~" she added in but tilted her head to the side when no one seemed to answer. "Aww, no one's home," she concluded as she followed Genos further into the more than humble abode.
"It would seem that sensei had some errands of his own to take care of," Genos pointed out as he placed the box that held Kagome's uniform on the floor next to a moderately-sized bookcase that was filled to the brim with manga. "Would you mind waiting here while I check the kitchen?" He asked politely as he walked towards the kitchen area.
Kagome shook her head and smiled, "Go ahead, I'll be fine~" she told him as she eyed the bookcase curiously. 'I wonder what type of manga he likes…' The blue-eyed woman then reached out and plucked a random one from the shelf. It appeared to be the average shounen genre manga. While she did enjoy reading those and watching their anime counterparts, Kagome was not here at the bookcase for her own entertainment. No… She was a woman a mission to find out-
"What's this guy's kink?" She whispered to herself as she scanned the spines of each manga individually, searching for something that she could use. "Every manga geek has one…" she told herself. Hell. Even she had a fetish for kuudere-type characters and bishies. They were just so lovable!
Sorry. In hindsight, maybe it was wrong of me to look through your manga collection without permission.
Then again, you had it out in the open so it wasn't supposed to be private, right? Oh well. Too late now.
I didn't realize it at the time but I was so curious about you for a reason.
________________________________________
The trip the supermarket turned out to be just as pleasant as their walk from the café to the apartment, if not even better. Genos explained to Kagome how much Saitama loved sales and saving money since he did not have much and she wholeheartedly agreed with him. She was no low-ranking hero, but she was the average university student: broken. "I am surprised that Sensei is not here himself. He usually the first one at the door when a sale is taking pace, "Genos pointed out while filling a plastic bag full of discounted leeks.
Kagome nodded and smiled fondly as her eyes glanced over the prices of fruit that were adjacent to the vegetable section that Genos was taking care. The duo was nearly back-to-back as one grabbed vegetables and the other grabbed fruit and placed them into their shared shopping cart. "Hey, Genos…" she suddenly called. The cyborg turned around and saw the woman comically standing in front of the citrus section with a small tangerine in one hand and a luscious grapefruit in the other. She held the two fruit in front of her chest, as if comparing them to her breasts and asked with a determined look on her face, "What size does Saitama prefer?!"
Genos sweat dropped, "I am unsure of how to answer that question…"
To make matters even worse for the poor guy, Kagome then placed down the tangerine and picked up a cantaloupe, "Or could it be that he's the melon type?!"
Time seemed to fly by much quicker with Genos' new friend than when he shopped or cooked alone. He was more than impressed about how having one extra person along for a task could change the entire atmosphere. Shopping that used to feel like a necessity if not a complete chore turned out…dare, he thought it…fun? Kagome was an oddball of the special variety. She had times where she was sweet and innocent, accidentally making his heart race with a small action like bumping into him while walking. There were other times where she was more impish but still in a cute way. All in all, the cyborg found him enjoying the time that they spent together.
After hours of errands and cores, it was around 7PM at night and their dinner was just about ready for serving. Kagome's eyes sparkled at the sight of the hotpot simmering with slices of beef, eggs, and veggies. She wafted the heavenly aroma to her noise and made a humming sound of contentment,"Mmm, sukiyaki in late summer~ I feel so spoiled~!" She commented since sukiyaki was typically a winter dish. But the two agreed that their haul from the sale called for a dish that would do all of their procured treasures justice all at once.
Genos nodded and added, "I'm sure that Sensei would appreciate a hearty meal like this as well. He should be home any minute now."
Kagome smiled as an idea popped into her head, "that reminds me of one last thing that I want to do today! Come on, I need your help!" She urged the cyborg while taking his hand and all but dragging him out of the kitchen and into the living room.
Genos looked down at Kagome with his usual expression and began to ask, "What is it that you need to-?"
"Turn around for a minute," Kagome commanded but in a tone that did not come off as "bossy". The cyborg complied, despite being confused about how she could need his help while he did nothing but stand there and face the opposite direction. Genos, being a calculating as he was, set a sixty-second timer and waited patiently while staring at the wall as he watched the numbers inside of his head countdown to zero.
Once the timer stopped, Genos turned around to look at his friend, "What is that you nee-?!" only to find that his eyes met the sight of Kagome's panties-covered rear-end. She was in nothing but her matching light-blue bra and panties and bent over to step into her maid uniform.
Kagome's face immediately turned red as she yelled, "Wait, I'm not ready yet!"
And as cruel fate would have it, the front door opened and in stepped Saitama in all of his yellow-suited, bald-headed glory. "Genos, I'm bac- …Ah." His expression, of course, was that pokerface that Kagome learned to be his mood-neutral one. His wide but blank eyes stared at the scene before him as Kagome and Genos stood frozen in place in an awkward silence. Kagome was still bent over, in nothing but her underwear while Genos stood dangerously close behind.
From Saitama's perspective, he just walked in on something that was…
"I-it's…" Kagome was the first to speak but her breath was caught in her throat. "-n-not…"
Finally Genos recovered from the shock that seemed to override his systems and took over for her, "What she means to say is, it is not what it looks like Sensei," he informed his mentor calmly, "We are in this situation because Kagome was in dire need of my assistanc-"
"Gross. That's enough, dude."
"W-What?! It's really not what it looks liiiiiiiiiiikeeeee!"
________________________________________
What Kagome had hoped to be a peaceful, comfortable dinner for three turned out to be the exact opposite: it was so awkward, for her at least. While Genos did not seem bothered by what had just transpired, she was still quite flustered. It did not help that the bald man sitting directly across from her had been staring at her non-stop with that blank expression on his face during the entire meal. Even when he was shoveling food into his mouth, he was staring at her relentlessly with those big eyes of his. Even when she tested to see if he was staring at something behind her by scooting to the left and right, those eyes followed her where ever she went. It was so unnerving! She wished that if he had something to say that he would just come out and-
"Oh." Finally, he spoke, a small smile replaced that unnerving blank stare. "You're that maid from yesterday: Kahuna!" He stated triumphantly, as if he just made an exciting discovery!
Kagome slammed her head against the table before glaring at the man sitting across from her, "It's KAGOME, you idiot!"
"Ohhhh, riiiiight," he replied while scratching the back of his head sheepishly. "I knew that I've seen you from somewhere before but I couldn't put my finger on it." With that mystery finally solved, Saitama continued popping slices of savory beef into his mouth.
"You can't be serious…?" Kagome glared at him with a deadpanned tone.
"Do not worry, Kagome," Genos spoke up suddenly. "My Sensei here is a good man. He is just so preoccupied with his daily quotas that his memory fails him sometimes."
"Well, to be honest," Saitama added as he eyed another slice of beef in the pots of goodies. Kagome huffed as she watched his chopsticks reach out to pluck the meat from the brew. The annoyed young woman reached over to the hotpot with her own chopsticks to thwart Saitama's plot of dominating all of the beef strips! "You look like a chick that I banged in a dream once," he said casually. Kagome's chopsticks stopped just short of the beef as she froze. "Oh, cool," he smiled while grabbing the forfeited piece of flesh. "More for me~"
Genos noted Kagome's bright red face and incredulous expression and decided to step up for her, "Sensei, please. It is inappropriate to tease her like that at the dinner table."
Kagome shook her head and crossed her arms, "Thanks but that's not it, Genos."
"Oh? Then you are not upset about Sensei ruining the mood with his perverted humor?"
The answer to the question even piqued Saitama's interested as he stopped picking over the vegetables to stare at Kagome as she played with a lock of her hair, feeling a little embarrassed under the scrutiny of the two men. "No, "She quickly with a small pout at her lips. "I'm upset that he thinks that it was a dream, "she admitted, her eyes settling on the shining table surface as heat rushed to her cheeks at the sound of the two men choking on and spitting out their meal.
The confession even had Genos acting out of character, his pale cheeks now flushed bright red, his blonde hair standing on end, and his eyes widened, "S-S-Sensei, is this the truth?!"
"Uhhhhh…" Saitama scratched his cheek while looking up and away, avoiding Genos' and Kagome's eyes as she did to them. "I guess…it's possible," he concluded with a smile, despite his shock and even hidden embarrassment.
Kagome finally got the courage to look up from the table and at Saitama's face, she was grateful that he was not looking at her back this time. "We met before yesterday…" She said nervously, her voice wavering with embarrassment. Yes, she usually avoided embarrassing situations but this case was different and special to her. She needed to do this. "It was a bit over a year ago…" The two men fell silent as they listened to her story. "I was at a beach party with my friends. Of course, we're in college so a lot of people got drunk. Some jerk hit on me and got rejected so he took my key-ring and threw it into the ocean…"
________________________________________
['Dammit! Why is this happening to me?!' Kagome thought to herself miserably and angrily as she sloshed around in the frigid, dark waters, searching fruitlessly for her lost apartment key. Her so-called "friends" had long gone home or to a guy's house, leaving her on the beach alone well past 3AM. Despite being cold and wrinkly, Kagome's hands continued to search through salty water, sand, slimy weeds, and rock to find that familiar feel of jagged metal. Every minute or so, she would break the surface again to rest her arms and gasp for air. After what felt like hours of scrambling, she decided to call it quits. Her body was not going to tolerate the elements for much longer.
Despite giving up on her futile attempts to find her key, Kagome did not return to her apartment yet. It was not like she could get in anyway. Instead, she opted to sit on the dock and watched the big, white moon command the dark waves to taunt her about her powerlessness. Suddenly, she knew what would make her feel even just a little bit better. The young woman got to her feet, balled up her fist, and screamed as loudly as she could into the silent night. She screamed and screamed out her frustrations and anger about the cruel hand that fate dealt her today.
"Uh… Are you okay?" Came an unfamiliar, masculine voice from behind her.
Kagome screamed again, but this time in fear and not anger, and jumped as she turned quickly to face the stranger, "W-Who are you?!" She asked nervously while looking the man up and down. He had a perfectly bald head that reflected the moonlight, an odd yellow body suit, and a cape. "A cosplayer?" she asked hopefully, silently praying that he was a nerd and not some random pervert.
"Actually, I'm a hero for fun," He replied with a smile, "What are you doing out here so late? And why are you soaked?" he asked, a hint of concern was hidden within that curious tone.
Kagome shook her head and shifted on her feet in an embarrassed manner, "I uh…lost my key in the sea.." she stated skittishly. It was far too personal to tell a stranger about how she was sexually harassed and that's how she ended up losing her key.
"Oh," the stranger's face turned a blank one, "Well, that sucks."
"Yeeeeeaah…" Kagome averted her eyes from him for a moment. That simple reply in that nonchalant tone made her feel awkward somehow.
"Okay, wait here," he commanded nonchalantly. Before she had the chance to even ask him what he was going to do, the hero leapt so high into the air that his bright-yellow suit faded into the darkness of the night sky.
"Uh..what?" She asked dumbly as she gawked up at the stars, wondering just what was going on.
A few seconds later, the swooshing sound of air molecules parting as a high velocity figure dove into the sea. The impact was so great that Kagome was sent flying backwards a few feet but she managed to sea that for a moment, the sea had parted, revealing the sandy, rocky, and weedy floor. If she were not freezing her butt of from being soaked, the young woman would have thought that she was dreaming! Once again, before she had the chance to even process what happened, a red gloved hand took hold of her own and dropped her key into it with a simple, "Here~"
Kagome looked up at the face of the total stranger who dive-punched the ocean to find her lost key. She was beyond astonished, almost speechless. She did not even care that his face was rather goofy looking when plastered onto that egg head of his. All that she knew that if she said nothing, it felt like her heart was going to jump right out of her chest. So she acted on her first impulse, which was to throw her arms around the neck of the man and pour heart out, "Thank you! Thank you so much!"
"Eheh, no problem~ It's what I do," the hero replied while patting the small woman on the head like a child. "Now let's get you home, eh?" That said, the bald man showed her his strong back before squatting down.
"O…okay…" She said unsurely as she climbed onto the stranger's back. Despite living in Z City all of her life, she had never met a hero in person before. While she did not necessarily expect for them all to be snobs, she also did not expect to find one that was so kind-hearted and sweet.
"So…where to?" The bald man asked as he stood up to his full height with Kagome on his back.
"Um…do you knew where Z University is?" She asked back.
"Oh, so you're a college girl," He stated rhetorically as he took off into the night at a speed that was fast, but not fast enough to be put his new charge in danger of falling off. "You look a lot younger" he told her while making small talk.
Kagome merely laughed into his ear, "Yeah, I get that a lot," she told him. She smiled at her reflection in his bald head. Her cheeks were a soft hue of pink and a content smile was on her face. This was definitely the best part of her day. 'I'm sure that not everyone gets the opportunity to spend time with a hero like this… I should make the best of it~' She told herself inwardly as her smile widened at her own thoughts. "Hey, hero?" She asked.
"Hm?" He tried to turn his head and look at her but she clung too closely for there to be much room for movement. "What's up, kiddo?"
Kagome found that it was easy to be open and honest about her feelings when he was unable to look at her face, "You've made my night amazing~ Thank you so much!"
"Eheh, glad that I could be of service," He replied modestly, she could practically hear his smile.
"May I ask a favor of you?" She pressed on.
"Another favor?" He asked in a playful tone. "You're running up quite the tab, missy."
Kagome merely giggled and gently squeezed his shoulders, "you'd have my eternal gratitude~."
"Fine, fine," He sighed as if he were going to deny her request, even though she was sure that he would not have.
"I've dreamed of being able to fly like a bird," She told him. "You're super strong. Wanna help me out?"
"Eh," His tone turned a bit more serious. "That sounds a bit dangerous for a girl like you."
"Oh, come on!" Kagome urged while playfully kicking her legs and lightly pushing on his backside.
"O-Oi!" He called back at her, tightening his grip on thighs, showing that he was actually concerned about dropping her. "Don't be so pushy! I'm the one in charge here!"
Kagome rolled her eyes but smiled nonetheless, "yeah, yeah. Big hero. Blah, blAHHHHHHHHHH!" Suddenly in the middle of her mocking him, the bald man hurled her through the air like a professional American football player would.
Meanwhile Saitama stood there for a moment, watching the young soar through the night air, "Ah…maybe I threw her too hard," he wondered as he watched her small body stay airborne for longer than expected. He shrugged before dashing and leaping into the air to save her life. To his surprise, instead of screaming in terror, the strange woman was laughing her ass off when she landed in his arms bridal-style.
"T-that was awesome!" She exclaimed through her teary eyes and fits of her laughter. She wiped a tear away before smiling up at him. "You're the best!" She told him with a goofy, lop-sided smile, obviously drunk off of her adrenaline rush. Saitama merely stared down at her and laughed as well. "Oh… We're here," she blinked as they landed right in front of her apartment.
"Yup, ride's over," he told her as he sat her down on her feet. He held out a gloved hand and smiled, "Now pay up, missy," he teased, obviously wanting to end their encounter on a light-hearted note.
But Kagome was not ready for their encounter to end.
"Sure," She whispered before quickly leaning up to the man and pressing her soft lips against his. To her surprise, his lips were warm and softer than she expected for a manly hero. And the rest was history…]
________________________________________
Saitama looked completely dumbfounded as Kagome stopped her story before getting into the dirty details,"…huh, so that night wasn't a dream… Weird."
Kagome's dreamy-eyed expression instantly turned into a sour one, "You're the only weird one here…" she said sharply before eyes went aflame, "And stop eating all of the beef, dammit!"
Genos sent a stern look to his mentor and nodded his head in agreement, "Kagome is right, Sensei. I have tallied your total number of meat strips consumed to be at twenty-two. Kagome and I only put thirty in the entire pot."
"Okay, one more then," The bald-headed man stated while reaching for a final-
Kagome dove across the table and slapped the hero's hand like a naughty child, "No more! Save some meat for me, dummy!"
Genos sweat dropped in the background, "I think you mean, save some for us…"
Saitama then turned into serious mode. His facial features becoming sharper and much more devilishly handsome. Kagome's breath hitched into her throat at the face. It was the face that remained the center of her wet dreams for months since that night. "I've got some meat saved for you right he-"
"Don't you dare finish that sentence, you creep!" Kagome screamed with tears in her eyes and her cheeks dyed a deep red as she grabbed Saitama by the collar and shook him senseless, all the while he merely smiled widely and laughed at her expense. Meanwhile Genos watched the pair while taking the last eight pieces of beef for himself. His mentor was laughing in an oddly amused manner as the tiny woman shook him hard to break a normal person's neck. Seeing two people who he liked so much get along made him feel warm and fuzzy inside.
To keep the good mood rolling, the cyborg urged his mentor and Kagome to try to recall more details about their first encounter. The answers from the two were nothing short of hilarious and embarrassing with the two of them taking shots at each other every chance that they could.
"I was only going to make-out with him," Kagome said at one point in a matter-of-fact tone. "He's the one who got hard from a little kissing!" She laughed at the blank face that she received from Saitama.
He then retorted in a monotone voice, "It doesn't take much to get your rocks off."
"H-humph! Says the guy who thought he could please a girl with the pace of a half-dead turtle~"
"Ah," Saitama paused for a moment. She had a point but there was a reasonable explanation for that, "you told me that it was your first ti-"
Once again, Genos found himself choking on his dinner. Kagome was instantly at his side, holding up a cup of warm tea up to his lips and helping him wash down the half-masticated food. The raven-haired woman glared at Saitama who blinked and stared at his disciple with his mouth ajar and eyes wider than usual, "Woah, Genos, you okay?"
"You idiot! That was too-much-information! You almost killed poor Genos!" Kagome scolded him while caressing the cyborg's pale cheek tenderly, a look of concern on her face.
Perhaps it was all the talk of love-making that had went on but just the light touch of her dainty fingers against the cyborg's face sent electric pulses coursing throughout his body. He shivered and unintentionally leaned into her touch.
"Ah, my bad, dude," came his mentor's reply.
Once Kagome determined that the blonde was in no danger of asphyxiating on his meal, she promptly returned to shaking Saitama senseless.
Yes, indeed. It was a wonderful sight to behold someone getting along with and appreciating his mentor as much as he did…
…but it was also somehow oddly uncomfortable. Something about watching them made him feel a bit uneasy. 'I will ask Dr. Kuseno to check my wiring to make sure that nothing is malfunctioning.'
Kagome had no idea how things led up to this but here she was in another odd situation. She was laying on her side in the darkness of a small, cramped living room. Her body was squeezed between her two male companions. Even after Saitama moved the table into the kitchen, the small living area was packed. Okay… There actually was enough place for all three of them to sleep on the floor with elbow room but somehow, night time seemed to be an especially magical time where everything went terribly wrong yet terribly right at the same time.
At first Kagome could not sleep and laid awake on her back while staring up at the unfamiliar ceiling. She spent a lot of time wondering what Saitama and Genos truly thought of her, especially after her confession of their meeting a year ago. At first, she thought that it would be awkward and Saitama would be creeped out that she wanted to get to know him further after that one-night stand. But the hero, nor pupil, seemed to mind her presence at all so she was unconsciously encouraged to stay a lot longer than she intended to.
Even after telling you that we've met before, I still didn't get the chance to tell you everything that was weighing on my mind for an entire year.
Like…for instance… I wanted to tell you about how much I regretted not ever asking for your name or getting a way to keep in touch with you.
I searched and searched for you on the Hero's Association registry and found nothing. I was so confused and disappointed. Even if you didn't feel anything for me romantically, I still wanted to get to know you.
Kagome sighed and closed her eyes, her body naturally shifted uncomfortably as her bottom began to go numb. Instinctively, she turned to her left and laid on that side. Upon opening her eyes, she expected to see Genos' back about a half meter away but instead, she came face-to-face with the cyborg's sleeping …well, face. Her eyes widened as she blushed from their proximity. Sure, she was pretty friendly with him but she was not quite ready to be so close that she could feel his shallow breaths against her lips.
The young woman shut her eyes and then decided to turn and lay on her right side, where Saitama was situated. 'Jeez, Genos… Thanks a lot,' she thought bitterly, not daring to open her eyes quite yet. 'You would end up so close to me like that!' It just was not fair! Even though she did not have any romantic feelings for the cyborg, she was still a young woman, ripen with desires and hormones and in her prime! She was not blind to how astonishingly attractive he was! When he was awake, and interacting with her, it was easy to be his pal and ignore ogling him. When he was sleeping so soundly so close to her…that was an entirely different story. Her mind left to wonder over what her body felt.
"What's wrong? Stomach ache?"
"Eh- Saitama?" She asked, cheeks flushing when her eyes open in response to the sudden voice. "You're awake?"
His signature big eyed, blank stare was her only answer.
"Oh, uh…" She stammered, realizing that he was waiting for an answer. "No, I just…can't sleep…"
"Ah," he propped his head up using his elbow as he continued staring at her. "You're not thinking of jumping my bones again, are you?" He asked with a light-hearted smile.
Kagome's face went beet red as she whisper-shouted, "A-As if! That was a one night thing!"
It was only after the hero laughed that she realized that he was only messing with her again. He smiled and added, "Too bad~ I was looking forward to it too" he teased, expecting another cute reaction that he was becoming more and more fond of.
Instead she took him by surprise by smiling impishly and placing a small hand on his hip, "Well, if you insist…" she trailed down to his inner thigh, "We can give it a go if you can be quiet~"
"O-Oi!" The bald man protested in the quietest voice he could muster as for once; his own cheeks were dyed light shade of red as he glared at the evil young woman lying next to him. "That's playing dirty!" He told her before turning away to face the wall and hide his face. For a moment, he completely lost his usual composure and was actually flustered.
Kagome merely giggled, not feeling bad about teasing one bit. It felt rather goodto get so deeply under his skin. But she decided to be nice and not pursue the matter, "Okay, okay~ I'm sorry~" she said in an appeasing pat him on the back gently to apologize. Though she would never admit it, she would have minded if something actually did happen between them in that moment.
"Kagome, Sensei, I detect that your levels of dopamine, oxytocin, amongst other hormones are increasing at an abnormal rate. Shall I perform a physical exa-"
"G-Go back to sleep, Genos!" Kagome commanded.
Within in an instant, the cyborg was laying back down in his futon with an obedient, "Yes, ma'am."
________________________________________
It was another low-traffic, boring afternoon at Maid Paradise, Kagome's workplace. Despite early afternoons being slow, no one on shift was ever sent home early like workers in fast food companies. So here she was again, sitting unladylike on the front counter where customers came to pay for their meals before leaving, and chatting with her fellow maids about the usual: their favorite heroes. It was only after she reunited with Saitama that Kagome actually found the conversations interesting. Usually she spaced out and pretended to listen to the chatter by smiling and nodding her head in agreement to whatever someone said.
Yuka, a young woman with bone-straight, shoulder-length black hair clapped her hands together as she gushed over the thought of her favorite hero, "I'm so glad that I was off last night! Amai-Mask appeared in a special interview on channel five yesterday!"
Eri, a sweet-hearted woman with naturally wavy hair that Kagome found herself secretly envious of, nodded twice enthusiastically, "I know, right?! He's so beautiful and elegant- like a true prince~" Kagome sighed inwardly despite her outward brilliant smile, she wondered if anyone would ever bring up heroes who she actually cared about: Saitama and Genos. She visited them so often and sometimes stayed over for extended periods of time that she was borderline living with them. She did not need a top three favorite heroes when she already had two who she knew person-
"Kagome-chan! Helloooooo? Are you going to answer?" Eri asked curiously while waving a hand in front of her colleague's face.
Eri then pointed out and giggled when Kagome's face flushed in embarrassment at being caught spacing out, "I bet Kagome-chan got so caught up in the conversation that she daydreamed about her dreamboat~"
The three young women squealed like high school girls at the thought of it. This caught the attention of the three other maids on duty: Koharu, Kagura, and Ayame and the seven maids formed a circle of young women leaning against counters, brooms, or sitting on buckets, chatting about their fantasies.
"So Kagome-chan, who is it~?" Ayame asked in a sharp tone. "It better not be my Speedy Tail!"
Yuka rolled her eyes at the red-haired, pig-tailed maid, "Oh can it. Kagome-chan isn't interested in your Koga guy," She told her while crossing her arms, "Not when heroes like AMAI-MASK EXISTS~!" She added in a dreamy voice.
That was it.
"Enough speaking up for me!" Kagome interjected. "I can speak for myself, thank you very much!"
"Then do it already!" the rest of the maids yelled back at her collectively, causing her to wince at the sheer volume and pitch of their cacophony.
"Fine…" She mumbled while tucking some of her long hair behind her ear. "My favorite heroes are…" She trailed off for a moment, a bead of sweat running down her forehead at the sight of her colleagues slowly inching towards her in anticipation. "…G-Genos and Saitama!"
The café was quiet for a moment…
"…who are they?" came the first whisper.
'Crap…' it felt like a large weight crashed down onto her shoulders when Kagome realized that most people called their heroes by their assigned nicknames! "U-Uh…I mean uh… The Demon Cyborg and…"
Kagome winced again when the group of maids shrieked in perfect unison, all of their eyes glowing brightly as they cupped their hands together.
"The Demon Cyborg… He's so handsome~!"
"And he looks so cool and collected all of the time!"
"I wish he'd look at me with those sexy eyes!"
Kagome huffed, as she did not get to finish telling them about how much she adored Saitama. The group of maids went off on a tangent about how cool and attracted Genos looked. As much as she too liked Genos. She still wanted to talk about… "SAITAMA IS THE COOLEST HERO OF ALL!" She suddenly screamed over everyone with her fists balled up passionately. She did not know what came over here but there it was: her heart on her sleeve. "HE'S STRONG, KIND, AND HANDSOME, EVEN IF HE'S BALD!"
"B-Bald…?"
"Saitama..?"
"She can't mean Caped Baldy, can she?"
"The rank leecher?"
"Mou…" Kagome huffed but resisted the urge to stomp her feet childishly like she did with Saitama. "You should know not to judge someone by rumors before you get to know them! You should act more like adults!" She chastised them with inflated, reddened cheeks.
Ayame smiled and poked Kagome's cheek, deflating the air that was puffing them up, "Look who's talkin', Mrs. Puff~" she teased and her fellow maids joined her for a collective laugh at Kagome's expense.
________________________________________
It was an oddly peaceful day in Z city today. No dangerous leveled threats were terrorizing the citizens like they usually did. No random villains crashing through the ceiling to challenge Saitama or Genos. It was a perfect day…too perfect. It was a nice, quiet day that mainly consisted of Saitama slouching around with a manga and Genos catching up on housework. All was calm and right until…
{Knock, knock}
The blonde cyborg peered at his mentor from the kitchen door, "Sensei, I believe that Kagome has come to visit us again." Genos stood there for a moment with a mop in hand before he heard another pair of soft knocks at the front door. "Shall I let her in, Sensei?"
Saitama scratched his head before hopping to his feet, "Nah, it's cool. I got it." He felt like getting under her skin by making her knock at least two hundred times before he answered, but with how earnest Genos was…he would never be able to pull off that troll with his disciple around. "Yeah, yeah…" He almost groaned as he unlocked and opened the door.
Kagome was still dressed her maid costume as she greeted him with an alluring, coy smile while squirming in a timid manner, "H-how…may I serve you today, Master?" She asked before slowing batting her eyelashes.
For a moment, she felt victorious as he stared at her with wide eyes and slightly ajar lips…
"…goodbye," was his reply as he moved to swing the door closed.
"Wait, a sec!" Kagome shrieked as she threw her feet in the door at the last second. "I was kidding, jeez!"
Saitama stared at Kagome with his blank, goofy face.
Kagome stared at Saitama with her pouty, puffy face.
Genos looked between them both with his typical, focused face.
"Well? What is it this time?"
"What's that supposed to mean?"
"You show up whenever you have a bad day."
"H-Hey, not true!"
"Sensei, she is correct. Kagome shows up good moods very often."
Saitama looked uninterested as he picked his nose with one hand and held up his manga in the other.
Kagome's pouted deepened, "I want you to come to Maid Paradise."
"Nope," the bald man replied while turning a page.
Genos held up his hand like a child in a classroom, "I am willing to visit your work place, Kagome."
Kagome laughed sheepishly as her eyes shifted from side to side as she tried to think of the kindest way to put her next thought, "Well uh…I actually don't need you to come, Genos."
Instantly, the cyborg deflated and his bangs shielded his eyes and he fell into a depression.
"W-Well, that doesn't mean that I don't want you there though!" Kagome added in as her arms flailed about. "You're naturally invited if I invite Saitama!"
Genos' head immediately lifted as he returned to normal rather quickly. When it came to Saitama and Kagome, this particular cyborg was easily pacified.
Kagome then turned her attention back to Saitama, she clapped her hands together and smiled brightly, "So? How about it, Tama?" She put a sweet emphasis on the new nickname.
The bald man did not seem phased by the nickname at all as he did not look up from his manga, "Genos can go. That place looks expensive. I'm not made of money."
"…I'll make your entire meal free," Kagome said.
"What day and time?!" He suddenly was on his feet with balled up fists.
"Tomorrow, 1:30PM~" Kagome smiled as she made her own determined fists.
"Sensei, you fell for her bait hook, line, and sinker."
The maid then waved Genos off, "come on now~ All is fair in love and war! Let's go celebrate!"
"Is today a special occasion?"
"Of course! It's "Kagome Conquered Saitama Day"!"
________________________________________
"Eh… You okay?" Saitama asked Kagome, who was sitting on a stool next to him with deeply flushed cheeks and hazy eyes. When he saw the young woman wobbly from side to side, he placed a hand on her shoulder to steady her, "Oi! You had too much!"
Kagome merely groaned as if she were tired before turning to her left to look at her companions. "I…did…NAWT!" She exclaimed in a slurred protest. "You're not having fun…?" She glared at him and pouted as usual.
The bald man gently swished his drink around in his tiny, shot glass and replied, "Meh, ever since I became this strong, it takes a lot longer for me to get buzzed."
Kagome frowned as she leaned over and wrapped her arm around Saitama's shoulder and whined, "Mou, superhumans like you are no fun!" She then looked beyond him over to Genos, who was sitting to Saitama's left and two stools away from her. "Nee, Genos… Are you as alcohol tolerant as Tama here?"
The cyborg looked over at her, his normally pale cheeks had a slight red tinge to them, "As a cyborg, I too require a large amount of alcohol to become intoxicated, but it is not impossible."
Kagome grinned cheekily at hearing that and leaned further on Saitama until her torso was sprawled across his lap. She ignored his signature "Oi!" that he used to get her attention or protest against her to give Genos a toothy smile and raise a toast to him with her ½ full shot glass.
"That's what I like to hear~ Drink up with me! You're the best, Genos!" She encouraged him.
That encouragement, praise, and smile was all that the blond needed to proceed tossing back shot after shot while the remained in Saitama's lap, clapping and cheering for the cyborg gleefully. "Go, Genos! Go!"
"Are you even allowed to get drunk, dude? It won't scramble your circuits?"
"…..I assure you that my body is strong enough to hiccup handle something as hiccup trivial as liquor."
Kagome giggled and fist pumped the air, "That's the spirit, Geny! You're awesome!" She then looked up at Saitama's blank expression, "not like this stick in the mud," she added sourly while glowering at him.
Saitama merely sighed and smiled while patting her head, "You're such a brat."
Kagome pouted before laying her head down in his lap. The hero tensed when her cheek landed on a rather personal area. "Tama…can I ask you something?"
"You're going to ask no matter what I say."
"S-Sensei…hiccup…you should take it easy on he-ccup every once in a while…"
Saitama gritted his teeth and glared at the blond, "Don't side with this brat!"
"Saitama…" Kagome whispered while tugging on his shirt, successfully bring his attention back to her. "…i-is a citizen girl like me no good?" She asked in a soft voice. The hero-for-fun found himself almost speechless at the sight of her deep, tender-looking eyes.
"Eh?"
"Or do you prefer women who look more mature?" She asked with a small pout on her lips. She continued asking questions without waiting for answers, "Do you really hate my job that much? …Am I not girlfriend material to you? Would dating someone like me be too embarrassing?"
For once Saitama felt caught off guard, even flustered. If his two companions were not wasted, they would have noticed that he was blushing the way Kagome usually was from his teasing. He looked left and right to make sure that no one was around to witness his embarrassment. Fortunately, the only other person inside of the small, adult lounge was the bartender, a much older gentleman who was too busy cleaning glasses to notice their conversation, or just "heard it all" before so didn't care.
"I-Idiot, what are you going on about so suddenly?!" The hero asked as he pulled the woman off his lap with one hand and placed her back onto her stool. Despite his annoyance at her antics, he still had the heart to hold her steady by her shoulder.
"Sensei…hiccup…" Genos completely turned his body so that it was facing Kagome and Saitama. His hands were resting on each leg as fists. Despite his red cheeks and occasional hiccups, Genos maintained his usual expression, "I too am curious about how you feel about Kagome. Please answer us."
Kagome giggled as she slumped against Saitama again, "See~? Even Genos wants to know! Tell us, Tama~!"
"Sensei, please…" The intoxicated cyborg began to imitate Kagome in whining to her way to victory.
"Tama…" she tugged on his shirt. "Tama. Tama. Tama. Hey, Tama. Tammmmmaaaaaaaa."
"Sensei. Sensei. Sensei. Sensei. Sensei." He tugged relentlessly at the other side of Saitama's shirt.
Saitama found himself becoming more and more annoyed by the obnoxious duo who was double-teaming him into submission.
"Taaammmaaa! Tammmmaaaa!"
"Senseiiiiiiii. Seeeeeenseeeei."
More and more angry veins popped out of his shining forehead.
"ENOUGH, YOU IDIOTS! I CAN'T BELIEVE THAT YOU'RE THIS DAMN ANNOYING!"
Genos then shrunk away with his head bowed in shame and dejection, "Y-Yes, Sensei…"
Once his disciple was taken care of, Saitama then turned his attention to Kagome who was leaning her forehead against his shoulder, grumbling about something incoherently. "As for you!" He continued to yell while lifting her chin up by one thumb to force her eyes to meet his. His usual comical face suddenly transformed into a more serious and defined, chisel form. "You want to know?" He asked in a voice so low that it made Kagome shiver in delight. She nodded slowly as she was too entranced by his face to speak.
Even in her drunken haze, Kagome instinctively leaned up closer to Saitama's face as his slowly closed the distance between them more and more. She closed her eyes and awaited the soft contact that she had no felt in a year.
{DOINK!}
Saitama flicked her forehead, causing the young woman to squeak in surprise. "H-Hey! You're such a tease!" She glared up at him as her eyes clearly burned with disappointment. She groaned and wobbled as he pulled her to her feet with one hand.
"Time to go," He announced before looking at Genos, who was still lamenting over his mentor exploding at him, "You okay to walk, dude?"
The cyborg attempted to nod his head affirmatively but instead ended up face planting onto the hard bar counter surface, creating a small crater in the marble.
Saitama stared at his disciple with a blank expression, "…I'm not paying for that."
Man… Kagome was a bad influence on Genos. Never before had the cyborg been such a pain in the ass.
'But…it's become a lot more fun too…' The bald hero thought to himself as he tucked each of his companions beneath his armpits like sacks of potatoes. He looked down at the maid who grinned up at him with a large, toothy smile and smiled. 'You annoying girl…'
________________________________________
Saitama carefully laid (the passed-out) Kagome down onto the spare futon that Genos had purchased especially for her visits. He removed her frilly maid headband and then her dress shoes. 'Genos must be rubbing off on me,' he thought to himself when he noticed how he was working hard to make sure that she was comfortable. His dark eyes settled on her stock-covered legs… They looked skin tight and probably uncomfortable to sleep in. He swallowed a lump in his throat as he stared at her thighs. His fingers grabbed a loose hold of the hems of her stockings that clung tighter to her skin due to the light layer of sweat that coated her body from her intoxication.
He mentally cursed his body's and memory's timing as his hands being so close to her nether regions brought back memories of that faithful. It was just not the hours of passion that came to his mind. It was scenes that seemed to have faded from his mind over time that suddenly flooded back to him…
________________________________________
[ The night was hot and sticky with the heat of summer and humidity of the summer. Superhuman abilities be damned. There was nothing worse than a sleepless summer night without air conditioning! Even sleeping naked did his body no justice. "It's HOT!" He shouted in frustration while kicking his hot futon away from him.
'I need to cool off…'
That thought led him to pulling on his uniform and heading towards the closest 24-hour store. He was dying for a popsicle! The bald hero even took his time strolling through the empty aisles to bask in the cool comfort of the air-conditioned, brightly lit store. It was not intentional but upon exiting the store, he happened to overhear the banter of a group of young men who was hanging around the store's entrance with clearly nothing to do but talk and talk.
"So you struck out with that Higurashi chick, huh?"
"Yeah," another replied in angry tone before he laughed, "But I got her back by throwing her keyring in the friggin ocean!"
Saitama paused in his strides and licking of his treat to listen closer.
"Wow, you're a dick!"
"That's awesome!"
"Ch'yeah, I know. And I heard that she has no roommate or family nearby so she's probably still out there at the beach looking for them!"
"Didn't the tide come in by now?"
"Oh…yeah… Oh well, maybe she drow-…"
The young man then gulped nervously when he was suddenly overshadowed by a slightly older looking man with a look that could almost literally kill. "You…" Saitama nearly seethed as he placed his hand on the sweating guy's shoulder, "That girl you were talking about… Which beach is she on?"
The young man looked around at his friends, who were all glaring at their unwelcomed guest, and suddenly felt confident that their numbers would keep him safe. "What's it to ya?!"
In under sixty seconds, Saitama got the information that he needed and he took off in a mad dash in the direction of the beach. He left the group of college boys lying on the ground unconscious and bruised. His half-eaten popsicle was melting on top of the head of the man who boasted about taking revenge on a woman who rejected him…
The hero would have preferred that the woman had gone somewhere else but the fact that she supposedly had nowhere to go unnerved him. He had to at least go and look! Within a matter of minutes, Saitama had arrived at the beach that the guys claimed to have been. The entire area that would have been covered in sand during the day was submerged already. He would have given up on searching until he heard a feminine voice screaming out in frustration.
That was his cue.
The hero jumped into the air and landed on a dock, the source of the angry screams. And there she was… A young girl in a light blue sundress decorated with a sunflower pattern. Her hair was long, dark and trickled down to her waist. "Uh… Are you okay? He asked her. It was actually pretty amusing to witness her nearly jump out of her skin as she turned to face him.
It was one of the best nights that he had in a long time. Where he found no joy or excitement in fighting villains anymore, he somehow found a sort of warmth in the short time that he spent with this young woman- who he had mistaken for a high schooler. Ordinarily, he would have pegged her as obnoxious for being so familiar, demanding, and expecting of a complete stranger. But this one was different from most civilians.
She took his claim to be a hero at face value and seemed to relish in it. Her eyes sparkled when she looked at him and she seemed thrilled to be around him. Best of all, she was appreciative of the favor that he had done for her. Saitama found himself smiling and complying to every request and demand that she asked of him. It was hard not doing what someone so cute and sweet wanted. After he let her experience what she called "flying", she clung to him even harder, though there was no way that she was hurting him or making him comfortable.
"Hey, Hero…" The blue-eyed woman said to get his attention.
He looked down at her, "Yeah?"
"This was the best night ever~" She told him while smiling brightly. "I'll always appreciate what you've done for me! You took the time to help someone like me…" She trailed off for a moment before beaming again. "Thanks again. I love you~!"
His eyes widened and he looked up ahead of him to hide his pink tinted cheeks. "Anytime," he replied, trying to sound cool and retain her positive image of him. He decided to forgive her for being so bratty and not hiding that she was sniffing him while in his arms.]
________________________________________
Saitama smiled fondly at the memory as he peeled and pulled the slightly damp stockings down from her legs and carelessly tossed them away. Genos, who had already recovered from his bout of intoxication, dutifully collected the pieces of Kagome's costume that his mentor discarded without much thought. For once, the cyborg did not speak his mind. He silently watched his teacher take care of the young with a hidden fascination. It did not take a genius like Dr. Kuseno to deduct that even though he did not care to show it directly, Saitama was just as smitten with Kagome as she was with him.
The blond then placed a hand to his breast plate and left it there. 'What is this tightness that I am feeling?' He wondered as Saitama finally tucked Kagome neatly into her futon. 'My body has been experiencing very peculiar symptoms as of late. Perhaps I am in need of another maintenance.' After deciding to check-in with his doctor and father-figure, Genos proceeded to head to bathroom to hand wash Kagome's sweaty stockings.
________________________________________
Kagome slowly blinked her blurred vision away. She was staring up at a familiar ceiling: the one in Saitama's and Genos' living room. 'Why…am I here…?' She thought to herself before groaning at an intense pain in her head. "Tama…" she groaned out while sitting up slowly in her futon. "Genos?" She looked around and listened for the sound of anyone but discovered the apartment to be empty. "Oh… Huh…?" She blinked and noticed a plate sitting on the small dining table. The achy woman crawled across the small floor space.
A piece of paper that was folded in half to form a tent-shaped note that stood on its own was sitting there. "My name is written on it…" She said to herself. She flipped the note open and read it, "Kagome, you're a light weight. Saitama." Her eye twitched and read a second part to the note, "I left you some pain medication, herbal tea, and lunch in the refrigerator. I took the liberty of calling your manager and told him that you needed the day off. I hope that you recover from your imminent hangover. Genos." She smiled at the note before heading to the kitchen to eat her lunch.
'Oh…it's 5 already…' She thought to herself with wide eyes. 'How long was I sleeping?!' The young woman would have been freaking out over missing work but she trusted that Genos handled those affairs for her. She did not remember much about the night before besides that she promised to treat her two best friends to a meal at Maid Paradise. 'I guess we need to reschedule that…' she thought to herself. 'Oh well.' With a shrug, she decided to make the most of her evening off~ She drew herself a hot bath and decided to relax before getting started on dinner.
'Maybe I should go all out tonight to thank them for taking care of me again,' she mused before sinking beneath the surface of the water. 'Yeah, Saitama has been working hard lately… I'll help him out~"
A few hours later the heroic duo finally returned home after a long, drawn-out meeting for S classed heroes that Saitama was once again dragged into it. The bald hero spent the majority of the meeting spacing out and tapping his foot anxiously, as if he had Restless Leg Syndrome. "Genos, next time there's a meeting you S ranks…don't invite me," he commanded as the cyborg followed his idol into their apartment.
The blond bowed his head respectfully while closing his eyes, "Yes, Sensei. My apologies. I assumed th-"
Saitama held up a gloved hand to signal his pupil to be silent. "Hold that thought- What's that smell?"
Genos closed his eyes and inhaled the lovely aroma filling the room, "I believe that Kagome has dinner prepared." His eyes shot open at the sound of an overly confident, feminine laugh.
There in the kitchen door stood Kagome with a triumphant, almost cocky grin on her face and her hands on her hips. "It's not just dinner, my dear Genos~ It's our feast!" She announced with pride.
Instead of smiling and thanking her for being a sweetheart like she had envisioned, Saitama glowered at her as he walked towards the kitchen, "Oiiii…" he grumbled, "Is that my favorite hoodie?!"
She blinked and looked down at her attire: a baseball styled gray and red hoodie complete with the word "OPPAI" and a pair of cartoony breasts imprinted on the front. "Yeah," she replied innocently before tilting her head to the side, "Why?"
Saitama stood straight and tall above her to emphasize their difference in height and build. He placed his hands on his hips as he frowned down at her and scolded, "I get that we're close but aren't you getting too cozy around here?"
Kagome returned his glare with one of her own and a small pout, "well, my uniform was dirty and I didn't have a change of clothes."
"You could have called," The bald man insisted, raising his voice slightly and adding a bit of sternness to his tone. "You always seem to find a way to reach me. Now bow your head, "he commanded as his face became more serious.
Genos frowned, feeling concerned about the situation that was unfolding in front of him. "S-Sensei, I think that scolding her is good enough! He spoke up from his spot a few meters away from them.
Saitama looked over at his pupil, his face still serious, "You being soft on her only enables her," he pointed out, causing Genos' eyes to wide before he shrunk away to mull over his sensei's words. "Brace yourself, Kagome."
The young woman shut her eyes and kept her head bowed as she waited for the impact: a bop on the head, a flick to her forehead, or a pinching of her cheeks- she was used to Saitama "punishing" her with things like that whenever she "crossed the line". For a moment, there was nothing but silence until she finally felt a strong hand rubbing the top of her head gently. "Permission to use granted."
"!" Kagome's eyes shot open along with her mouth as she tried to express her frustration in being misled but the playful smile on Saitama's face left her with nothing words caught in her throat.
"Dinner's in here, right?" Saitama asked curiously while attempting to walk past Kagome to enter the kitchen. He was halted by a small hand clutching his sleeve. He looked down at the small woman whose cheeks were red and eyes stared up at him, as big and wide as a doe's.
"You two just relax at the table," Kagome's blushed intensified as she spoke. "Tonight, is entirely on me!" She told him while giving her chest a light thump of her fist.
"Okay," He gave in easily, feeling lazy after a long, boring day anyway. "What's on the menu?"
"You'll see~" She chimed while skipping happily into the kitchen, the slight raising of her legs giving Saitama a glimpse of her pink, silky panties. Saitama twitched and immediately turned away to sit at the dining table across from Genos.
After a couple of minutes of Kagome scurrying hastily back and forth between the kitchen and the dinner table, the feast was finally spread across the center of the table. Saitama stared at the assortment of dishes with wide eyed, blank face. "There we go~ We can start now!" She announced after setting a whole, baked chicken down in front of Genos.
"What are you up to?" Saitama asked while raising an eyebrow suspiciously at her.
"Sensei, I believe that Kagome is simply trying to do kind deed for us," Genos chimed in.
"That's right~ I'm just that type of person~" Kagome beamed at her blond friend.
"Traitor," Saitama mumbled as he began filling his plate with a bit of everything.
"Quiet, you~" Kagome nearly sang as she watched her friends all of her dishes. Sure, she spent more than she normally would on food today but it was worth it! She really wanted to spoil them for all of the times that they indulged her and her antics~
"May I have something to drink?" Saitama suddenly asked while looking at her.
"Eh- Right! I forgot the tea!" She exclaimed while lightly bonking herself on the head. "I'll be right back, okay~?" She asked rhetorically while jumping to her feet and scampering back into the kitchen to fetch their beverages. Meanwhile Genos silently analyzed his sensei's actions as the bald man openly stared at the woman as she exited and re-entered the room with a tray in her hands. "Sorry the wait~" She apologized with a smile as she placed three cups on the table and began distributing the tea.
"Kagome," Genos suddenly called for her attention as she handed Saitama his cup.
"Hm?" She simply asked, smiling down at the cup but still actively listening to the cyborg.
"I analyzed Sensei's behavioral and biological patterns and have concluded that he is most stimulated when you are in his clothing," He stated informatively and rather bluntly as he accepted his cup of tea.
"Sppfft!" Saitama spat his tea out as Kagome's eyes lit her up and she cupped her hands. "G-Genos!" the exposed hero protested while throwing his follower a warning glare.
"Is that so?" She asked in awe. She then turned to look at Saitama with a cattish smile, "So that's your kink, huh~?" She teased while giggling behind her hand.
"It is not, b-baka!" The bald man stammered a bit as he looked away, trying to hide his blush.
"On the contrary, Sensei," Genos interjected. "I observed that youhave stared at her 350% more than usual tonight. Your heart rate has also accelerated mor-"
"Genos…" Saitama mumbled in a dark tone as his facial expression became grave. "Do you want to be punched?" He asked in a deep voice.
Genos sweated a bit and looked a bit startled, "No, Sensei-!"
Kagome laughed as she leaned over and patted Saitama's shoulder, "Don't worry, Tama~" she said in reassuring tone, "There's nothing to be embarrassed about!"
"I am not emb-!"
She then placed her hands on her cheeks, blushing a bit as she smiled affectionately. A sparkly background appearing as she added, "It's okay to love me~"
Genos raised his and voiced his opinion, "I concur! Sensei and Kagome would make a great cou-"
Before the two continue double-teaming him, the bald man grabbed one of their cheeks with each hand and gave them both a slight pinch, "Cut it out, you two. Your alliance needs to end here and now."
Kagome groaned as she rubbed her reddened cheek, "Jeez, you need to learn to take a joke, Tama!"
Saitama replied bluntly, "You may say that but Genos, here," he gestured at the cyborg with his thumb, "Is dead serious. I don't even knowif he's capable of joking."
"Actually, Dr. Kuseno has used his genius to ensure that I am capable of all ordinary human activities, including humorous endeavors," Genos explained while raising a finger. "Observe. Knock, knock."
Kagome beamed and played along, "Who's there~?"
"I am," He concluded, his voice and face as calm as ever.
Kagome faltered as Saitama sweatdropped and stated," I don't think that's how that works, dude."
Kagome gave her best considerate laugh before she noticed Saitama chewing on a baked chicken leg…and the boney remains of the other leg sitting on his plate. "Hey now! I wanted the other leg, Tama!" She exclaimed with almost watery eyes.
"Oops."
"No, oops! You always hog- Oomph!" Her complaining was cut short by Saitama casually pushing the remainder of the leg into her mouth. She glared at him but chewed on it, instantly feeling satisfied by the gesture.
Genos watched the scene unfold with a small smile. Once again, he found that he was touched that his sensei had found someone who cared about him and who he obviously cared for in return. He almost pointed out how Saitama was a bit of hypocrite with how he scolded his follower for always pampering this young woman when he too was always quick to give into her blue eyes. Still…his chest felt oddly tight despite that all of his systems were green and functioning properly.
________________________________________
I know that I wormed my way into your lives.
I know that acted informally with you right away, without really having the right to.
I know that I took advantage of your kindness so many times.
But I'm sorry, I didn't mean to, honestly.
I was just acting on my feelings and listening to my heart.
And my heart told me that I wanted to be with you.
Saitama grew silent as he continued reading the end of the letter in his head as it became more and more intimate. Nothing in the letter was particularly shocking or eye-opening to him, but he pressed on and read it in its entirety.
I noticed that lately our relationship has become a bit ambiguous.
I don't know if you feel the way but that's how it feels to me.
I'm probably being presumptuous but…
I feel like you might feel the same way that I do.
But you've been holding back while I've been pushing forward.
I'm sorry for acting so selfishly and nothing of what you want more often.
The hero stiffened as he read the next part of the letter. He did not expect her to be so observant and to know him so well… 'I should have known that she'd know me… She's been watching me all of this time.'
I wonder if you're holding back because you're afraid of dragging me into danger.
Or maybe you're holding back because you don't want to hurt Genos…
Don't worry. I feel the same way.
I love Genos too. I don't want to see him hurt either.
So I feel uneasy about moving forward sometimes, knowing how he feels about me.
You two are so sweet together. Genos is my little cinnamon roll and you're my /u/ !
Saitama stifled a laugh at Kagome's use of a cute emoji instead of an actual noun to describe him.
I don't to ruin your friendship.
So that's why I decided to move on.
"…" Saitama was unaware of how his face visibly paled. Genos however detected his massive fluctuation in heart rate. "That…idiot..." He whispered, feeling an intense concoction emotions that no one person ever elicited from him at once.
You know how I just graduated last week, right?
Well, I decided that I'm going to start my life anew somewhere~
I'm not sure where I'll go or what I'll do yet but I'm sure that it'll be fun~
I got the feeling that you two would try to stop me so that's why I'm telling this via letter.
First… Let me say what I wanted to on the day of our reunion…
"Genos…" Saitama whispered, "I'll be back. Take care of lunch while I'm gone."
"Wait, Sensei," The cyborg suddenly called out as his mentor opened the front door.
"What's up? I'm in a hurry," Saitama blinked and asked curiously.
"You and Kagome…don't have to be considerate of me," the young man stated. "Besides Dr. Kuseno, you two are the most important people in the world to me… Ever since I lost my family, I thought that I was alone-"
"Twenty words or less, dude."
"R-Right!" Genos gave his sensei a thumbs-up, "Go get her." Before adding a small smirk appear on his face, "But just know that I will work hard to catch up to your strength and I will steal her away."
Saitama merely smiled at the cyborg and half joked, half challenged with a thumbs-up of his own, "We'll see about that." And with that, he took off in a rush towards the train station. According to the letter that she had written a few days prior, he had about an hour before her train arrived. 'Kagome, I'm coming.'
Did I ever get to ask you if you were embarrassed to date a civilian?
'You did. You were just too drunk to remember.' The hero raced until he was out on a busy street with countless vehicles zooming by. He easily leaped from car roof to car roof as he rushed around the city to find Kagome. His first destination was the train station to check if she may have gone there early.
Hehheh, I know that I'm probably too weak to stand by your side.
But if you'd let me, I would be, forever and ever.
'What do you think I've been doing all of this time, baka?' He mentally asked her, as if she could hear his thought from where ever she was.
If only I could travel back in time*, I'd go and relive these years all over again.
You'd think that I would told you how I felt after all of this time.
Even though I acted confident and flirted with you a lot, I was still nervous about it.
The truth is…
Saitama grunted as his eyes scanned left, right, up, and down and he searched high and low for Kagome in the crowds upon crowds of busy commuters. It did not help that she was a bit short for her age!
Saitama, I'm your biggest fan.
I've absolutely adored you ever since the night that we first met.
________________________________________
Kagome sighed as she sat idly on the dock where she first met Saitama. The tides were low so her legs that swung over the edge of the platform could not reach the surface of the water. Sitting next to her was her small suitcase of her essential worldly belongings: some clothing and other personal items. She smiled wistfully down at the strip of photos from a photo booth that she, Saitama, and Genos once squeezed into after she gave them her infamous puppy eyes. Her blues eyes misted up before tears pelted the slick surface of the photos one by one.
The top photo was a normal one where Kagome smiled brightly; Saitama yawned; and Genos stared directly at the lens calmly. The second photo asked them to act surprise: Kagome placed her hands on her cheeks and opened her mouth to simulate "The Scream"; Saitama's face had big, bulging eyes; and Genos stared at the lens calmly. The next one the machine instructed them to make silly faces so Saitama crossed his eyes while Kagome grabbed the edges of Genos' mouth and stretched them out into a huge, creepy smile as she stuck her tongue playfully. Finally, Kagome's face was complete red as her companions who were sitting on each side of her both kissed her cheeks, as the machine suddenly instructed.
'At least…I'll always have this. I'll be able to see their faces every day,' She comforted herself inwardly before a cruel, powerful gust of sea wind swooped in and snatched the photo strip free from her hand. "Eh?! No!" She shouted as she stared in shock at her souvenir danced happily as it was carried up and away by the wind. "You gotta be kidding me!" She shouted while stomping her feet. For a moment, she was angry…but that anger was soon replaced by a wave of sorrow. It did not matter if anyone saw or heard her. She wept openly and loudly. Her hands covered her eyes but those small hands could not hide the endless trails of tears that poured that streamed down her face. 'Why is it that I only feel lucky when I'm with Saitama and Genos?' She asked the gods miserably.
"Jeez, you really ought to take better care of your things," a familiar voice said calmly from behind her.
'No way-' Her midnight sky colored hair cascaded around her as she whipped to face the voice head on. "Sai…tama…" She whispered as her red, puffy eyes stared at him in disbelief. It felt like she was dreaming, just as on that fateful night. But it was real, and so was he.
Saitama shook his head at her while smiling and holding up her precious photo strip between two fingers, "You want it, don't you?" She nodded quietly while wiping her tears away as he approached her. He smiled warmly as he held her precious souvenir out to her. Kagome gave a small, watery smile as her hand slowly reached for-
"Eek!"
{SPLASH}
Kagome gasped for air as she resurfaced then cringed at the taste of salty water in her mouth. She glared up at the hero who was standing at the edge of the dock, smiling casually at her. "What was that for, you jerk?!" She shouted as she extended her arm towards him. He complied and reached down to grab her hand and pull her back onto the dock with ease.
"That was punishment for being stupid," He replied simply while grabbing her suitcase and walking away from her.
Kagome huffed and glared at his back before running to catch up to him, "What do you mean stupid?!"
"Well," The egg head explained, "You left a runaway note and told exactly when you'd be running away. You were practically begging to be caught."
Her cheeks darkened as she retorted, "I was not! I was just…I didn't think that you'd come looking for me…" her voice trailed off as she stared at the ground.
But it's not just that one night that I'm talking about.
I'm grateful for all of the time that you've spent with me.
I'm grateful for all of the times that let me stay with you with no questions asked.
I'm grateful for how many times you've walked me home from work.
All of it…everything that you could possibly think of- I'm grateful for.
Saitama looked up at the sky to avoid her gaze, even though she was walking behind him with her head down. "Well uh…" He began, not realizing that he was blushing a bit as he spoke, "How could I just let you go after you sent me that letter?" Kagome groaned aloud as she covered her face with her hands. "Besides I still owe you an ass-kicking on Manlio Kart** for all the times you cheated," he added.
"I did not cheat! You just suck ass at steering!"
I'm grateful to the gods for allowing me to meet you.
Saitama…you're…
"Ahhhh," The bald man suddenly sighed aloud. "You walk too slowly," he said before crouching down to the ground. "Hop on. We need to get you dry quickly or you'll catch a cold."
Kagome raised an eyebrow, "even though you're the one who got me all wet in the first place?" she asked while climbing onto his back.
He grinned cheekily over his shoulder at her and teased, "Hot."For setting herself up for that jole, he smiled inwardly and once again, forgave her for blatantly inhaling his scent and sighing deeply, as if she was drunk off of him.
"Oh, shut up, baldy!" Kagome huffed before laughed when he threatened to throw her off if she said that one more time. "There's no way that you'd seriously let me get hurt so I'm not afraid~"
"What makes you so sure?" He asked while glaring up ahead, still annoyed at being called bald.
The woman on his back tightened her grip around his neck as she leaned close to his ear. The light feeling of her breath sent delicious tingles down his spine. "Because," she whispered, "you're my hero…"
________________________________________
[Omake]
"Uh… Tama… what's going on here?"? Kagome asked as she blinked down at the single futon laying in the middle of the living room floor. "Where's Genos?" She questioned while propping open her suitcase to find some dry clothes to wear.
"Oh, I found a note," He said casually.
"What does it say?" She asked, temporarily abandoning her clothes to stand by Saitama's side.
"Sensei, Kagome… I have prepared a futon for you, fore I presume that you will want to copulate upon your return. The lunch that you requested is in the refrigerator. I will return by 6PM to give you enough time… Genos." Saitama's eye twitched as he finished reading. "That guy-… Ah?"
Kagome nibbled on her bottom lip cutely as she stared up at him with seductively timid eyes, "Well, if that's what you want," she whispered as she closed her eyes and leaned up towards her hero's face- "Kyaa!" -only to have Saitama hold her back with one finger to her forehead. "Hey! We have his permission, baka!" She exclaimed while pouting.
Saitama stifled a laugh before he smiled at her regardless, "You're such a dork."
"That's my line!" She pouted while crossing her arms. "You know you want me," she mumbled.
"Do you want me to break your back that badly?" He asked, tilting his egg-shaped head with a goofy face on.
Kagome pretended to mull over the question for a moment... "Maybe…"
"Fine," Saitama replied, giving into that youthful, sweet face that he came to love. He crossed his arms and stated firmly, "But first, you must service me to prove how badly you want it."
Kagome nodded enthusiastically as she began to unzip his body suit to reveal his muscular physique. "Yes, Master~" She replied submissively as she got onto her knees and set his hot rod free.
Saitama's serious face almost broke as he felt himself twitch and stand at attention after hearing her say that. 'Okay…' he admitted to himself. 'That was hot.'
________________________________________
Authoress' Notes:
* Did I succeed in irony? ( o u o)' cause that's what I was aiming for...
**This was a shameless reference to the hilarious game in Limitless Musing's "Kazoku" : s/11621063/1/Kazoku
*** This may have been better as a series of smaller drabbles buuuuuut since I don't know how long I'll be actively writing, I just went for a longer, one-shot ~
I probably ruined the cute ending that I was aiming for with this omake…but oh well. can't fight the right side of my brain!
I hope you all enjoy reading~ If enough people ask for it, I'll write the sequel that I've been thinking of ~
If not, oh well! I had a blast just writing this one ^ u ^
Title: My Hero
Category: Anime/Manga » Inuyasha
Author: The Amazing Sakumachan
Language: English, Rating: Rated: M
Genre: Romance/Humor
Published: 04-16-17, Updated: 04-16-17
Chapters: 1, Words: 21,253
________________________________________
Chapter 1: My Hero
________________________________________
Summary: Saitama and Genos receive a box of fan mail. Meanwhile, a dreamy-eyed maiden hopes that her number one hero will read her letter. (One-Shot)
Authoress' Notes: This came out weirder and longer than expected. But hey- an idea comes and my fingers move. Enjoy if you can~ ; w ; I know that it's waaaaaaay too long but it just kind of happened! As a warning, try to read it with an open mind because I wrote it the way that I envisioned an anime episode featuring this story would be like...if that makes sense _ I hope that it's not too hard to follow!
Pairings: Uhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh… kind of Saitama x Kagome x Genos? Idk what I'm doing here.
Rating: M for some language and subbbbbttttllllee mature themes!
________________________________________
[ My Hero ]
Genos was almost speechless from the anticipation that was hidden behind his stony, amber eyes at the sheer number of letters inside of the huge, box that was airmailed from the Hero's Association. Saitama whistled to express that he was rather impressed. "Wow," the older of the two young men's tone did not change from its usual casual as he commented at the small mountain of fan mail, "that's quite the haul this time."
The cyborg gave a curt nod as he began to sort and sift through them, "You are right." He replied as he meticulously created two separate piles: one for him and one for mentor. "But we both have much more active lately so it is to be expected."
Although he did not get his hopes up, Saitama smiled a bit and asked with a small hint of excitement to his voice, "Hey, any for me this time?" Although the letters were numerous, Genos' spectacular reading ability made the sorting job simpler and quicker than any human would be able to.
"There is one, sensei," Genos replied as he turned away from his pile of fan mail to hand his mentor the one piece of mail that was addressed to him.
"Thanks, dude," Saitama said graciously as he accepted and gazed down at his letter with a bit of fascination.
Genos was as anxious as his mentor to find out the contents of the letter, so much that he paid his own mail no mind for the time being. He was on edge from remembering a time not long ago when his sensei received a terrible, angry letter that accused him of being a "cheater". If need be, Genos was ready to incinerate the letter if its contents were of the unsavory kind.
For a few moments, the two of them remained silent and motionless. Genos sat by his mound of mail and stared up at his master, who stared at the letter wordlessly. A small bead of sweat ran down the cyborg's face, "uh…Sensei? Are you going to open it?"
Saitama's hardened expression then softened up to his usually goofy one as he placed his hand behind his hand like a skittish boy, "Well…" He admitted with a small, almost embarrassed smile. "I don't know if I can."
His mentor's reply instantly put the cyborg on edge as he jumped to his feet, "Why is that?! Do you believe the letter to be of ill intent?! I will dispose of it im-"
Saitama then held his hand defensively at his disciple, "Cool it, Genos," He did not like the blonde's hands were already burning hot, ready to fire and surely blast a huge gaping hole into his apartment. "It's not like that at all, " Saitama explained a smile reappearing on his face when Genos visibly calmed down and lowered his offenses. "This letter-" The self-proclaimed hero-for-fun then held up the letter to Genos' face and elaborated, "-is obviously from a girl," he finished calmly.
"Huh?" Genos blinked, almost is bewilderment, "A girl, you say?" The cyborg then examined the letter closely. It was encased in a lovely, feminine pink envelope with a lilac-colored floral design at the edges. The flap was sealed shut by bright-red, heart-shaped sticker. "I see…" He felt relief from knowing that but that relief was instantly followed by confusion. "But sensei, why would you not want to open a letter for such a reason? Do you prefer me-?"
Saitama stared at Genos blankly and interjected with a deadpanned tone," Don't even joke about that, dude." His expression then turned to normal as he explained, "This is my first and probably last letter from a fangirl. It feels like I should cherish it by never opening it." The bald hero then silently wondered if he should encase the letter in its own mini-shrine.
Genos sweat dropped," But sensei…I'm sure that if she is a fan now, she will continue to write you letters…"
Something visibly clicked inside of Saitama's head, "you're right! I'll read it then!"
Genos faithfully sat down in front of his mentor and bowed his head," please read it aloud, sensei!"
Saitama nodded as he peeled the sticker from the envelope's flap, flipped it open, and finally freed the letter from its encasement. "Here goes… Dear Chrome Dome-" Genos lifted his head and gasped as Saitama's eyes lit up angrily and his other free hand formed a fist, "WHAT KIND OF FANGIRL IS THIS?!"
"Sensei, you must calm down or you'll ruin your first fan letter!"
"You're right…" Saitama replied through gritted teeth as he glared down at the letter and continued to read in a hissing voice, "I mean, Saitama-sama…" his expression instantly returned to normal when it realized that the bald insult was a joke. "You probably don't remember me but it's me: Kagome." Both heroes froze at the mention of the sender's name.
After a few moments of silence, Genos finally asked his mentor, "aren't you going to read her letter, Sensei?"
The bald hero's face turned into a blank, almost incredulous expression, "She could have just told me in person."
Genos rubbed his chin thoughtfully and speculated aloud, "Perhaps she has something on her mind that she cannot say to you in person."
"This is Kagome we're talkin' about, right?" he asked before continuing, "She talks to me almost as much as you do. This is probably another prank of hers," he concluded dismissively, but while smiling fondly at the thought of her. The hero soon turned his attention back to the sheet of parchment in his hand. "You must be wondering why I'm writing to you," he read the next sentence. Ah. She hit the nail on the head without even being in the room. "Well, I've wanted to tell you something very important for a while now. We never seem to speak to each other properly for long and this is much easier for me than to face you in person… You see, it all started that day at the café…"
And this Saitama read the letter aloud and allowed its contents to take him and Genos on a trip to the recent past…
________________________________________
Kagome sighed as she leaned against a shining, wooden counter. Her eyes were glazed over as she stared out at of large, glass windows with boredom. It was 1:00PM on a Wednesday and most people were still in classes or at work. Meanwhile, here she was, working the mid-day shift at a small cafe in the middle of downtown City Z. She was like the other young women who ran the grunt work of the establishment. They were all college students who needed some employment for tuition and other essentials. The job paid well for being an entry-level one. Her shifts were also tailored around her class schedule.
The only two problems were how boring it could get during slow hours and…
The familiar bell jingles of a customer entering the premises caught her and the rest of her colleague's attentions. She and the other young women exchanged challengingly glance for a brief moment. All of them were bored of out their minds and looked ready to duke it out for the opportunity to have something to do.
However, Kagome was the quickest and beat the rest of the crew to the punch as she jumped over the counter to meet and greet their first customer in forty-four minutes. Kagome smiled brightly as she approached the door and coyly straightened her frilly, white apron. "Welcome, my Masters~" She giggled in voice so high and a manner so cutesy that the inner-Kagome inside of her head was bawling from embarrassment. "Table for-?"
That was when she opened her eyes and noted how the customer were actually a pair of customers. Odd ones. One was a blonde, rather handsome cyborg while the other was a man clad in a ridiculous, yellow body suit. "two…?" She finished, her cutesy tone broke into one of uncertainty as the older man gave her a deadpan stare.
"That's cringey," he stated bluntly before turning to his company. "Genos, why would you bring me here?!"
The cyborg replied earnestly, "My apologies, sensei. I assume that treating you to a maid café would be to your liking since you seem to enjoy mang-"
The yellow clad man then pointed directly at Kagome, to which she blinked as he shouted," Just because I like manga doesn't mean that I'm a pervert who likes things like this!" The young woman was dressed in traditionally black-and-white themed French maid uniform with the main dress being black and the white frilly hem of her petticoat reaching her mid-thighs. The black dress was complemented by shiny black dress shoes, white lacy stockings, and an intricately crafted headdress on top of the black crown of her head. Everything about the woman screamed moe and for Saitama, it was way over the top.
That struck a nerve in the young woman. It was her turn for her eyes to be set ablaze. She swatted his finger away, causing the two men to turn their attention fully to her. The indignant maid then stood within less than a centimeter away from the offending man. She glared up at his fiercely and was not daunted by their height difference. "Even if you're not into moe, you have no right to be so rude about it!" She lectured him.
"Say what now?" The manga fan asked blankly, wondering why this woman was seething at him.
Normally anyone who dared to challenge his sensei would be met by Genos' protectiveness as his loyal disciple, but this small woman was an exception. There was something unintimidating about a beautiful young woman in a maid outfit-. But it could have been anything from her youthful face to her feminine curves…or her lack of height.
Kagome visibly looked the man up and down. He was clad a tight, bright yellow body suit complete with red boots, gloves, a cape, and even some sort of special belt with a buckle. "Hmph," She huffed while continuing to glare, "You claim to not be a pervert but you walk around in public wearing that getup?" She asked pointedly. "I may be a cringey maid but at least I still have decency," she crossed her arms over chest and added, "baldy."
A vein appeared on the man's forehead and Kagome smiled cattishly, satisfied that she struck a nerve. Then suddenly, it felt like time had stood completely still for her when she noticed how the man's perfectly bald head reflected the afternoon sunlight like a mirror. 'That head… It feels like I've seen it somewhere before' she thought to herself. But before any more words could be exchanged, the ground began to shake and her colleagues began to scream in terror.
Kagome too squeaked when she lost her footing and fell to her butt unceremoniously. "What's going on here?!" She shouted over the booming and screaming of her colleagues as they ran out of the lobby and back towards the employee lounge.
"Sensei," The blonde cyborg stated in a grave tone. "I detect a high-level energy just outside this establishment."
The "sensei" nodded as he looked at his comrade while re-adjusting and tightening his red gloves, "Right. Let's take it out then find some real food."
Kagome glowered at the man from her spot on the floor, "Are you implying that our food isn't real?!" The young woman briefly forgot that something possibly dangerous was about to occur. She could not stand this man who was casually insulting her and her workplace. Sure, it was an embarrassing job but she came to love it because of the friendships that she formed with her fellow maids, her manager, and even the regular customers.
"Oh, you're still?" The yellow-clad baldly asked curiously as he turned to look at her fallen form. "It'll probably get dangerous so you should find somewhere to hide and be safe, "he told her calmly.
Kagome blinked, taken aback by the man's sudden change in tone and attitude. She stared speechlessly as the two men exited through the front of the building to face to incoming danger head on. "What's with those two…?" She wondered aloud to no one in particular.
(Outside)
Saitama and Genos stared blankly at the creature who appeared before them several meters away from the maid café. "You've…got to be kidding me," Saitama said blankly.
"It would seem that there are all sorts of monsters in this world, sensei."
It was fuzzy, gray, and the size of a kitten.
Actually, it was a kitten.
The monster flew from the sky and landed gracefully in front of them on all-fours was a small, gray, and green-eyed kitten. "It's a cat," Saitama said in half bored, half disappointed tone as they watched it lick one of its paw then seemingly groom the hair on top of its head.
"This cat is the source of the high level of energy though, "Genos pointed out, his face remaining serious and cold as he stared the creature down and awaited its attack.
That was when the kitten stopped grooming itself and looked directly at them, "that is correct." It said in a ridiculously high-pitched, cute voice. "I am no ordinary kitten!" It announced as it stood on its hind legs. "I am-!"
The creature's self-introduction was interrupted by a girlish coo and a cry of, "so adorable~!"
"What?!" Genos asked as he and Saitama turned around to see the spit-fire maid from earlier standing a couple of meters away from them, her eyes visibly sparkling and her cheeks flushed in admiration for the cute creature. "She did not evacuate like you suggested, sensei!"
"Ehhh…" Saitama said boredly while picking his nose and looking back at the "threat".
"Ahem…" the kitten cleared its throat and continued to announce its presence, "as I was saying, I am Bad Kitty! A monster born from the regrets of a manga-loving, socially reclusive geek who never lost his virginity!"
The brilliance in Kagome's eyes dulled as she asked sharply and looked at Saitama, "So you birthed this cat?"
"Hey, don't lump me in the same category as hat thing!" Was his protest as he turned his full attention back to the young woman who stared at his pointedly, as if the entire situation was his fault. The bickering trio was unaware of how the now-angry cat creature was slowly growing in size behind them until it overshadowed them completely. The three of them turned around and looked up at the creature that was easily the size of skyscraper. Its cutesy façade seemed to have melted away as its muzzle extended and jutted out large canines and fangs. Its tiny paws were now adorned by claws the length of a street sign and as thick as a car.
"STOP INTERRUPTING!" The creature roared furiously, "I AM BAD KITTY! AND I AM HERE TO (BEEP) GORGEOUS MAAAAAAAADS!"
"Oh," Saitama said casually as he turned to smile at Kagome. "That's not so bad. Is he your type?"
Kagome growled and shook her fist at the hero, "as if, PERVERT!"
"YOU DARE IGNORE ME?!" Bad Kitty raged as he quickly swatted at them, his paw moving much quicker than what one would guess from his massive size. Genos and Saitama easily scattered and dodged the attack with the maid in the latter's arms.
Saitama simply landed on top of a car with the maid in his arms, not caring too much that he muddied the sheen of its obvious recent wax job. "Here," he stated while easily setting the young woman down on her feet with one hand. She stared up at him with a dumbstruck expression and her lips ajar in awe. "You…saved me…" She pointed out.
"Of course, it's my job. He replied calmly. "I'm a hero for fun after all."
Kagome gasped softly and her eyes widened as the reason for this man's odd state of dress dawned upon, "I see… Well, thank you." She said in a small smile. Saitama blinked as he stared at her for a moment, wondering if her change in demeanor was because she found out that he was a hero.
"Hey, Genos!" The bald hero called over to his disciple. "You mind taking care of this one for me?" He asked before gesturing to the maid still standing by his side, despite the imminent danger surrounding her. "This one needs babysitting."
The blonde merely nodded and made a mad dash at the monstrous creature. Genos could tell by the look on Saitama's face that the man was not excited about this monster's presence and did not want to bother wasting time on it. Even though he was using the young woman as an excuse, this disciple saw right through his sensei's façade. Genos nodded to himself, finally, it was time to show his sensei and the world what he was made of!
"Stand back, meido-san!" The cyborg shouted as he jumped in front of the cat creature to face it head on. He began to charge a massive amount of fire power," I will incinerate this-!"
Before the enthused young man could complete his sentence, the giant cat creature flicked him away like an insect and bellowed at the sight of his metallic body crashing into the maid café not too far away. "You talk too much!"
While Saitama did not look fazed or concerned for his comrade, the young maid openly did, "Oh no! He's been hurt!" she cried out as she run from his side and towards the direction of Genos' crash landing.
"Oh boy…" Saitama mumbled when he saw the cat creature's sight turn to the maid who was running adjacent to him. "This one really does need babysitting." The yellow-suited hero then picked at and groomed his ear with a pinky.
"Ahaha…" The creature bellowed as he bent down to peer inside of the huge gaping hole in the maid café. "You should be more concerned about yourself, girly…" The creature taunted as he spotted the petite woman kneeled beside a pile of rubble that buried Genos alive.
Despite her fears, Kagome ignored the cackling monster as she threw brick up on brick aside until she unearthed the cyborg. "Hey, are you okay?" She asked with horror etched as clear as day across her face when she discovered the cyborg to be still alive but cracked and broken here and there.
His eyes flickered but he opened them nonetheless, "You shouldn't be here…" He told as he attempted to sit up and regain his composure. "It's too dangerous for a civilian."
Kagome frowned as she wrapped his arm around her shoulder and told him with determination in her voice, "civilian or not, I'm here to rescue you!"
The blonde shook his head,"I am an S-rank class hero. It is my duty to protec-"
Kagome glared at him, "Listen, buddy. It doesn't matter who registered as a hero or not in situations like this. People are supposed to help other!"
Getting his head bitten off by the young woman seemed to have quieted down but the peace did not last long. As soon as she turned them around to escape, she came face-to-face with a gigantic claw. "Down!" She called as she pushed Genos to the floor and dove on top of him protectively. The blonde's eyes widened as his face was stuffed full of her ample, soft breasts. Too afraid to move from her current position and not knowing what to do next, Kagome laid there on top of her charge. This would have been the perfect time for them to be rescued by that yellow hero guy. "Jeez, where is that Sensei Baldy when you need-?!"
Before she could complete her sentence, a loud sonic boom was heard from outside, followed by the sound of shower of squishy organs and blood raining down from the sky. "I'm guessing…we're saved…?" Kagome asked Genos but she paid him no mind since her attention was focused on the lanky figure who casually waltzed through the hole in the maid café. Kagome glared at him," you're slow."
Saitama blinked when he saw the compromising position that Genos and Kagome were in. The maid was completely straddling the cyborg with her huge breasts smothering his face. "And you're fast," the bald hero replied nonchalantly.
"What…?" Kagome blinked and cocked her head to the side for a moment, unsure of what he meant by that until she looked down and realized what she was doing… She shrieked as her face instantly turned bright red and she jumped to her feet, "I-It's not like that, you shameless pervert!" She exclaimed while waving her hands around frantically, "I was protecting him!"
"Right…" Saitama replied before looking down at the cyborg who laid down scarily still and stiff on the floor, "Genos, buddy, you still alive? Did her boobs suffocate you?"
"You really are a pervert!"
He ignored the young woman's accusation as he peered over and down at Genos' face. He was indeed alive and breathing. However, something was clearly off about him as his eyes were wider than usual and his mouth was ajar. An unusual expression of shock seemed permanently plastered on his face. "Did you blow a gasket or something?" Saitama asked curiously.
The cyborg suddenly blinked and was brought back to reality. He sat up and stated seriously, "Once again, my life has been saved by you, Saitama-sensei." He then turned his gaze upon the maid who was staring at him as worriedly as his sensei was. "And to you, meido-san, who risked her life to-"
Kagome sighed and cut in, "Sorry to interrupt but my name is Kagome, not meido-san. Use that."
Genos looked a bit taken aback and then nodded as he finished," Kagome-san, you risked your life to protect my own. Thank you."
Saitama then scratched his cheek, "That's nice and all but can we go now? I'm starving."
To Kagome's surprise, the cracked and broken cyborg got to his feet and dusted off his pants. "Yes, sensei," he replied dutifully, like a loyal dog. She guessed that he really did not need her help after all. She gasped sharply when the duo turned to leave.
"HOLD IT!" She screamed as she desperately grabbed onto Saitama's cape to hold him back.
The hero blinked as they turned and looked at her. "What now?" He asked. Of course. she was not strong enough to really hold him against his will but he was just the type of guy who rolled with it.
Kagome hardened her expression and prayed that her face did not betray how she felt inside and portray her thoughts. "You can't leave yet!" She told him. "You need to help me repair the damages caused here!" She explained in a shaky, desperate tone.
"Uhhh… Put it on my tab?" Saitama asked.
"We don't do that here!"
"Okay, goodbye!" He replied quickly as he turned away again, only to find that the woman tightened her grip on his cape.
"You're not going anywhere!" Kagome huffed and gave his cape a yank, though it did not budge him in the slightest.
The pang of hunger in his stomach meant that enough was enough.
"Cut it out, we're busy!"
"Please, Kagome-san," Genos began, trying to play mediator between the two. Never before had he seen anyone get under his sensei's skin so much in one sitting. This woman seemed more interactive with him than any other civilian. "My sensei is a very busy man-"
"There's something that I need to talk to you about though!" Kagome insisted while giving the cape another tug.
"Okay," within the blink of an eye Saitama turned around and had his hands on the hem of Kagome's apron. "Let's see how you like it." The superhuman hero gave the frail piece of cloth a tug. His state of annoyance seemed to have made him forget to hold back more because what he thought was a small tug had enough force to rip and tear off every piece of clothing that the young woman had one that day. "Oops," his face returned to normal as the air grew quiet.
The young woman was left standing as in nothing but her black shoes and white maid headband. Her breath hitched in her throat as her brain struggled to keep up with the sensation that her body felt and the blurs that her eyes missed. It took four whole seconds her to register what had just happened…
Kagome screamed and curled into a protective ball to save her decency, though it was far too late for her to save face with the two men who had seen her everything. "Y-You bastards! STOP LOOKING!" She seethed when she noticed that neither men tore their eyes away from her form.
It was only then that Genos' faces flushed as he was brought back to reality and he covered his eyes, "I-I'm sorry, Kagome-san!"
"Yeah, "Saitama added in a tone that did not sound sorry at all. It was a tone so casual that it felt uncaring. "My bad," he added.
"Your BAD?!" Kagome seethed as she scooched herself into a corner when she spotted a crowd of nosy people beginning to form outside. "How am I supposed to go home like THIS?!" Her face was incredibly flushed as opposed to her lightly tanned skin. Her cheeks were puffed full of hot air as she pouted and glared at the man who seemed to infuriate her so.
"Uhhh..." Saitama looked up at the ceiling for a moment before, "Good question," he commented.
"Sensei," Genos began while making sure to avoid both Saitama's and Kagome's eyes, "We must do something. It would be very problematic if a young woman were to travel around in such a state."
For a moment, the young woman squeezed her eyes shut and covered her ears, as if being unable to see and hear the two men would shut out the reality of the situation. It was an embarrassingly and unbelievable reality that she thought only happened in the ecchi anime that she sometimes found herself watching. 'This isn't happening. This isn't happening. This isn- Huh?' Her inner mantra was cut short by the sound of unbuckling, cloth flapping, and then the feeling of being covered in something soft.
Her blue eyes shot open and she was surprised to find that she could not see the background of the café. It was nothing but a white cloth surrounding her. It was like being in bed, sitting beneath her cozy blankets. Kagome then shook her head and nuzzled her way out of the white depths. It was then that she found herself staring up at a cape-less Saitama.
"You can borrow this," he concluded with a small smile and a surprisingly gentle pat to her head.
Despite the hero's smile, Kagome frowned in return but accepted the offering. She hugged it tightly around her form like a curtain to hide her naked body from the world. She was so embarrassed that she felt like she was going to die right then and there. The young woman glared at the bald man whose face showed no remorse for shredding her uniform and leaving her in the nude in public. She pulled the cape closer and allowed the lower part of her face to sink into its depths.
________________________________________
"kind of nice" Saitama read the line casually, despite how intimate it was. "I didn't realize it back then but the scent of your cape made me feel so relaxed. It was a manly mixture of sweat, musk, battle, and you."
Genos perked up at the description that she wrote of his sensei's cape. 'Manly scent… It is pheromones that attracts Kagome to sensei so…' he opened his notebook and began taking notes. He inwardly concluded that he would need to work hard to become as worthy of a man as his sensei was!
"I know that it sounds weird but…" Saitama paused in his reading to criticize the writer. "If she knows that it sounds weird, then why write it?"
Genos then placed his pen down onto the table and looked at his sensei, "It is because Kagome wants to share everything with you."
Part of the reason why I was so angry is because everything you did that made me feel so flustered.
From insulting my job to saving my life to ripping my clothes parts…I wasn't expecting any of it.
You took me by surprise in a few minutes more than anyone else has in a long time.
Honestly, I didn't know what to say, how to feel, or how to react, especially when...
...you didn't seem to recognize me at all.
________________________________________
"Eh?" Kagome blinked as another blush spread across her cheeks, "You're taking me home too?!" She could not believe this guy! He had crossed so many lines with her today and now he thought that she would let him walk her home?!
"I mean, even I would feel bad if I made a naked girl walk home alone," the bald hero explained with a small wave of his hand to emphasize his words.
Genos nodded in agreement, finally ready to face the pair after he recollected his composure, "Kagome-san, Saitama-sensei is a great hero and could not live with himself if he did not see you home safely," he assured her with a balled up, iron fist that showed his vigor for praising his mentor.
Kagome sweat dropped then gave Saitama a sideways glance of suspicion, "Is that true?"
The interrogated then laughed awkwardly while scratching the back of his head, "Actually, I wanted to make sure that you give my cape back~" he admitted shamelessly.
{SLAP!}
Kagome stomped out of the café while clutching the cape close to her body and nearly breathing fire like a raging dragon. Her eye twitched with agitation at the thought of Genos getting her hopes up before getting let down by Saitama.
The blonde cyborg outstretched his hand towards the young woman and called out, "Kagome-san!"
She then growled and glared over her shoulder at the duo, "I'LL WALK MYSELF HOME, YOU JERKS!"
For some reason, Genos found himself almost flinching at the insult directed at him. "I am…a jerk…?" He wondered beneath his breath. "Sensei, do you think that I-?" The cyborg blink before he noticed that this mentor was already down the block, walking not too far behind the seething young woman. "Ah, so sensei insists on seeing her home safely," he concluded. Before he had the chance to even consider joining them, an idea popped into his head and he quickly spun on his heels.
There on the tile floor laid Kagome's maid uniform that was ripped into several pieces. The cyborg stooped over and collected each piece one by one, examining each of them closely before picking up the other. "They are salvageable," he told himself.
________________________________________
The two of them walked in silence with the woman walking a meter in front of the man. She kept her head down to avoid showing her face to the passersby who openly gawked and whispered to each other about how odd the two of them looked. One was a young woman wrapped in a white covering scattered, displaced maid costume accessories; the other was a man in yellow body suit and random heroic accessories. 'When is he going to stop following me?' Kagome thought begrudgingly, pouting internally and externally as she fought that urge to turn around and confront him head on. 'Shouldn't a hero have better things to do?!'
Little did she know, the laidback hero who trailed behind her with his arms folded coolly behind his head was only thinking of what he should have for dinner tonight. He had no clue how far the woman lived from her work place but he hoped that it was not too much further.
Oh.
That gave him an idea.
Kagome shrieked when she suddenly felt her feet lift off the ground, followed by the rest of her body. "H-Hey!" She cried as in one, swift movement, she was bounced from Saitama's hip to on top of his back. Despite her protest, she instinctively rested her hands on his shoulders. "What do you think you're doing now, Mister?!"
Without turning to meet her gaze, which was most likely intense from the anger that she seemed to frequently suffer from, he replied while cupping his hands beneath her bottom. "Getting you home will be faster this way."
"Hmph," Kagome huffed and looked away from him, even though he was not even looking at her. "You just want an excuse to touch me~" she half joked and half excused.
"Even if that were true, it's not like you're protesting that much," he pointed out nonchalantly before changing the subject, "So…where to?"
Kagome found herself feeling dazed and dizzy from the ride home. It literally went by in a blur and what usually was a forty-five-minute walk (one that she took to and from work to save money on transportation expenses) turned into a two-minute run. She shakily climbed off Saitama's back to unlock the door to her quaint campus apartment. She kept the key in her shoe at work.
"Well…this is it…" She informed him while staring up at the man with a small blush on her cheeks.
"But…this is a college apartment, isn't it?" He asked while following her inside without bothering asking for permission. He at least had the decency to remove his boots and left them by hers at the doorway.
Kagome then stopped just short of entering her bedroom and asked back, "yeah, so what?"
"…aren't you a high school girl?"
"I'M TWENTY-ONE, YOU IDIOT!" She roared indignantly.
"Oh." Was his curt reply, he was already used to her dangerously short temper. "What a baby-face."
Kagome's expression then lit up before she batted her eyelashes cutely, "Glad you think so, Master~"
This instantly caused Saitama's own face to go sour, "So cringe-worthy…"
The maid huffed as she dropped her cutesy persona, "Jeez, you're so hard to please. Glad you're not a regular."
Saitama then smiled and commented," I don't see how anyone could be turned on by that kind of act-" Kagome's cheeks instantly puffed with hot air. "You're actually a lot cuter when you're angry than when you act like that," he admitted with a friendly smile that caught Kagome off guard.
Despite inwardly feeling happy that someone preferred a more realistic side of her to the act that she and her colleagues had to put on for the sake of the café's theme, Kagome attempted to glare at Saitama and asked, "Is that supposed to make me happy?"
"Ah? It doesn't?" The hero asked in confused tone as he blinked at her.
"No! What makes you think that?!" She huffed before retreating into her bedroom to get changed.
'What a weird girl…' He thought to himself as he stood awkwardly in her small living/dining room. 'She smiled at me for the first time today, but claimed not to be happy.' The hero soon found himself rather bored while waiting for the woman to change out of his cape and into normal clothing. Her apartment really left nothing to look at. It was even blander than his, despite being a bit bigger.
There were no photographs of family or friends hanging on the walls. There was no television for entertainment. There were not even any books, besides some a slightly disheveled stack of college textbooks sitting on top of her kotatsu. All in all, the lack of personalization to the space made it give off an almost melancholic vibe.
"Sorry for the wait," Kagome said as she emerged from her room wearing a simple heather-gray T-Shirt and a pair of faded blue jeans. "It took a while to find these," she said as she walked up to the hero with his cape folded neatly within her arms.
"You took a long time…just to find that?" He asked while arching an eyebrow and staring down at her as she stood up on her tippy-toes to re-buckle his cape to his shoulders. From the few seconds that her body was pressed against his, he could smell a light scent of some sort of flower.
He expected her to snap at him again but instead she laughed lightly and explained before backing away from him with an almost coy smile on her face, "Well, yeah…" she began while placing her hands behind her back and cupping them. Saitama noted how the woman's natural self really was much cuter than her maid façade. "I'm going back to work to see if I can clean it up a bit," she explained. "No one wants to do such dirty work in their nice clothes." 'Should I…ask him…?' she wondered inwardly, not noticing that the man bade her goodbye with a simple "See ya" and wave over his shoulder. It took a moment but she finally gathered up her courage and nodded to herself, 'I'll do it!'
Kagome then turned around to face the hero, "Would you like to-…?" Seeing that she was alone in the apartment with her door left wide open. "…that guy…" She sighed.
You suddenly took off without me noticing.
I didn't get the chance to tell you what I wanted to back at the café.
________________________________________
Even though work had been scheduled for the day after the disaster, Kagome was informed that she did not have to go in since owner was still arranging how to go about rebuilding and repairing the damage done. Still, she found herself showing up at her workplace with a broom, dust pan, and a box of heavy duty trash bags. It was not that she enjoyed cleaning for free but she honestly had nothing else better to do, besides study. And with the events of yesterday pressing so hard on her mind, studying was not an option. She needed something to keep her mind numb and her hands busy.
So there she was, sweeping up dusty and rubble in the warmth of another quiet afternoon all alone. Her colleagues who fled the scene as soon as danger seemed to approach had no clue what transpired or what even attacked them. They felt no obligation to show up and help clean. Last night she received an onslaught of phone calls and texts from worried coworkers, asking if she had escaped the café in one piece since she did not flee with them. Even though she was working for free and working alone, Kagome still found herself grateful that her fellow maids did leave as soon as the going got rough. 'The last thing that I need is for one of them to have been saved by Saitama too…' she thought absent-mindedly.
The young woman was snapped from her thoughts at the sound of someone's foot stepping on and cracking some of the shattered glass on the ground. She turned around with her broom in hand and was actually quite surprised to find that it was none other than the blonde cyborg from the day before. "Oh, it's you, " she surmised, "What's up? Did you forget something?" She inquired as he approached her quietly with an almost intimidating, stony look on his face.
"No, I did not," he responded before stopping right in front of her. "But you did," he added while presenting her with a small, cardboard box. Kagome looked unsure for a moment but reluctantly accepted the box from it. He nodded to her to open it and she nodded back before slowly lifting the lid.
"Oh… Is this…?" She whispered as she stared down at what appeared to be her maid uniform for work. She sat the box down on the floor before raising the uniform up to look at it in its entirety. "My uniform?" She asked while looking at the cyborg, utterly confused about how he could have gotten her a new uniform when they had to be custom-made by their company's supplier.
"I took the liberties of repairing it for you as thanks for protecting me, "Genos told her as he watched her examine and awe at his handiwork. "I hope it is to your liking, Kagome-san!" He exclaimed while giving her a deep but formal bow at his waist with his arms stiffly at his sides.
To his surprise, the young woman laughed blissfully and nearly tackled him as she threw her arms around his neck in an appreciative embrace. "Thanks a bunch, Genos!" She chirped before pulling away to smile up at him sweetly.
The cyborg ignored the odd feeling that he felt in his chest when he saw her smiling face. Somehow, it felt like she was glowing when she looked at him so fondly. "It is the least that I could do…" he insisted before tearing his gaze away from her. It felt as if he continued to look at her, he would find himself caught in a sort of hypnotic trace.
"No really~" She added as her smile got wider and her eyes began to sparkle, "I was so angry yesterday because the company charges us for replacement uniforms!" She finally looked away from the cyborg to admire her newly repaired maid costume, "but this looks as good as new! I'm so impressed that you're so skilled at sewing!"
Genos then nodded as he looked around the café and assessed the damage that was done to the place, "Do you need assistance in cleaning? I see that you are working alone."
Kagome smiled and shook her head from side to side, "Nah, don't worry about it~ I only came here because I needed something to do." She placed her broom against a table and clapped her hands together, "but now that you're here, I'm not completely alone! Wanna do something?" She asked hopefully while staring up at Genos with wavering, puppy-like eyes.
Genos rubbed his chin for a moment and looked thoughtful, "Well…I do need go grocery shopping for sensei and I. We are lowing short on-"
Kagome gasped and jumped closer to him, almost nose-to-nose as she stared into his eyes with fists balled up near her chest, "You mean that you two live together?!" she asked in an overly shocked manner.
The thoughtful expression on Genos' face changed back to his usual stoic one, "We do. It is more convenient for me to learn under sensei that way."
Kagome's face then changed to a slightly pouty one as she sighed, "How nice…~" She gave a small, wistful smile before adding, "I'm a bit jealous~" before laughing at herself to disperse what could have turned into a depressing atmosphere.
Being as straightforward as he was, the cyborg did not hesitate to ask out of sheer curiosity, "Are you jealous that I am living with Saitama-sensei?" The blonde's amber eyes readily connected to woman's blue eyes as he searched for an answer within the windows of her soul.
However, as soon as their eyes met, Kagome's retreated to the side as her cheeks flushed, "Don't be ridiculous!" She said defensively, "It's just that I don't have a roommate living with me anymore!" She explained as she looked at the ground. "Sometimes, it gets a little lonely, that's all!" She added with giving him a half-hearted glare. Honestly, it was much easier to glare at Saitama than Genos. The cyborg felt more genuine and curious, like a puppy discovering the world for the first time.
"I see," the cyborg replied while looking thoughtful once more. "Shall I ask if you can move in wit-?"
"No-THANK YOU!" Kagome interjected while placing a hand up. "Let's just get out of here, okay?" She changed the subject immediately. The last thing she needed weighing on her mind was the thought of living with the two extremely attractive heroes.
Genos nodded, willing to follow her lead just as quickly as he would his mentors, "Sure, let's. But let us depart for our apartment first, I need to do inventory of our current food stock."
Kagome nodded and laughed lightly as she latched onto his arm in a chummy manner, unintentionally brushing her breasts against his exposed synthetic skin. She felt him stiffened a bit and waved her hand dismissively, "Come on now, Genos~ You don't have to be formal with me~" she told him sweetly, "I just call you Genos without an honorific after all so just relax~ We're friends, aren't we?"
Their walk back to Saitama's and Genos' apartment was a pleasant and most comfortable one. The duo found themselves feeling more natural around each other than expected. For the first time in a long time, Kagome felt like she had a friend who she could laugh freely with. And for the first time in a long time, Genos felt like he was an ordinary human being. Their conversation most consisted of Kagome asking her new friend a question and him replying with a long, convoluted answer. The cyborg had quite the motor mouth, especially about Saitama, whom he adored and his past. But Kagome did not mind the chatter one bit; it was nice to have someone to talk with outside of work after all.
The young woman found then began to notice that the two of them were leaving the "safe" side of the city and venturing deeper and deeper in a sector that she and no one who she knew before yesterday dared to go… It was a borderline slum with trash about, dark alleys, and many uninhabited homes. "Ehh…" Kagome laughed nervously, "Genos…do you two really live here?" She asked unsurely, being in this area of the city made her feel a bit uneasy, despite being with a hero. Her senses were tugging at her, telling her that something sinister was lurking about somewhere not far.
Genos merely nodded and continued his long story about how he came to live with Saitama as he led her up the black, iron stairway to the front door. Kagome noted how he opened the door without unlocking it with a key and called as they stepped in, "Sensei, I brought a guest over!"
Kagome felt a bit nervous being in the bald hero's home but curiously peeked from behind Genos' taller form nonetheless, "Hello, hello~ Look who's here~" she added in but tilted her head to the side when no one seemed to answer. "Aww, no one's home," she concluded as she followed Genos further into the more than humble abode.
"It would seem that sensei had some errands of his own to take care of," Genos pointed out as he placed the box that held Kagome's uniform on the floor next to a moderately-sized bookcase that was filled to the brim with manga. "Would you mind waiting here while I check the kitchen?" He asked politely as he walked towards the kitchen area.
Kagome shook her head and smiled, "Go ahead, I'll be fine~" she told him as she eyed the bookcase curiously. 'I wonder what type of manga he likes…' The blue-eyed woman then reached out and plucked a random one from the shelf. It appeared to be the average shounen genre manga. While she did enjoy reading those and watching their anime counterparts, Kagome was not here at the bookcase for her own entertainment. No… She was a woman a mission to find out-
"What's this guy's kink?" She whispered to herself as she scanned the spines of each manga individually, searching for something that she could use. "Every manga geek has one…" she told herself. Hell. Even she had a fetish for kuudere-type characters and bishies. They were just so lovable!
Sorry. In hindsight, maybe it was wrong of me to look through your manga collection without permission.
Then again, you had it out in the open so it wasn't supposed to be private, right? Oh well. Too late now.
I didn't realize it at the time but I was so curious about you for a reason.
________________________________________
The trip the supermarket turned out to be just as pleasant as their walk from the café to the apartment, if not even better. Genos explained to Kagome how much Saitama loved sales and saving money since he did not have much and she wholeheartedly agreed with him. She was no low-ranking hero, but she was the average university student: broken. "I am surprised that Sensei is not here himself. He usually the first one at the door when a sale is taking pace, "Genos pointed out while filling a plastic bag full of discounted leeks.
Kagome nodded and smiled fondly as her eyes glanced over the prices of fruit that were adjacent to the vegetable section that Genos was taking care. The duo was nearly back-to-back as one grabbed vegetables and the other grabbed fruit and placed them into their shared shopping cart. "Hey, Genos…" she suddenly called. The cyborg turned around and saw the woman comically standing in front of the citrus section with a small tangerine in one hand and a luscious grapefruit in the other. She held the two fruit in front of her chest, as if comparing them to her breasts and asked with a determined look on her face, "What size does Saitama prefer?!"
Genos sweat dropped, "I am unsure of how to answer that question…"
To make matters even worse for the poor guy, Kagome then placed down the tangerine and picked up a cantaloupe, "Or could it be that he's the melon type?!"
Time seemed to fly by much quicker with Genos' new friend than when he shopped or cooked alone. He was more than impressed about how having one extra person along for a task could change the entire atmosphere. Shopping that used to feel like a necessity if not a complete chore turned out…dare, he thought it…fun? Kagome was an oddball of the special variety. She had times where she was sweet and innocent, accidentally making his heart race with a small action like bumping into him while walking. There were other times where she was more impish but still in a cute way. All in all, the cyborg found him enjoying the time that they spent together.
After hours of errands and cores, it was around 7PM at night and their dinner was just about ready for serving. Kagome's eyes sparkled at the sight of the hotpot simmering with slices of beef, eggs, and veggies. She wafted the heavenly aroma to her noise and made a humming sound of contentment,"Mmm, sukiyaki in late summer~ I feel so spoiled~!" She commented since sukiyaki was typically a winter dish. But the two agreed that their haul from the sale called for a dish that would do all of their procured treasures justice all at once.
Genos nodded and added, "I'm sure that Sensei would appreciate a hearty meal like this as well. He should be home any minute now."
Kagome smiled as an idea popped into her head, "that reminds me of one last thing that I want to do today! Come on, I need your help!" She urged the cyborg while taking his hand and all but dragging him out of the kitchen and into the living room.
Genos looked down at Kagome with his usual expression and began to ask, "What is it that you need to-?"
"Turn around for a minute," Kagome commanded but in a tone that did not come off as "bossy". The cyborg complied, despite being confused about how she could need his help while he did nothing but stand there and face the opposite direction. Genos, being a calculating as he was, set a sixty-second timer and waited patiently while staring at the wall as he watched the numbers inside of his head countdown to zero.
Once the timer stopped, Genos turned around to look at his friend, "What is that you nee-?!" only to find that his eyes met the sight of Kagome's panties-covered rear-end. She was in nothing but her matching light-blue bra and panties and bent over to step into her maid uniform.
Kagome's face immediately turned red as she yelled, "Wait, I'm not ready yet!"
And as cruel fate would have it, the front door opened and in stepped Saitama in all of his yellow-suited, bald-headed glory. "Genos, I'm bac- …Ah." His expression, of course, was that pokerface that Kagome learned to be his mood-neutral one. His wide but blank eyes stared at the scene before him as Kagome and Genos stood frozen in place in an awkward silence. Kagome was still bent over, in nothing but her underwear while Genos stood dangerously close behind.
From Saitama's perspective, he just walked in on something that was…
"I-it's…" Kagome was the first to speak but her breath was caught in her throat. "-n-not…"
Finally Genos recovered from the shock that seemed to override his systems and took over for her, "What she means to say is, it is not what it looks like Sensei," he informed his mentor calmly, "We are in this situation because Kagome was in dire need of my assistanc-"
"Gross. That's enough, dude."
"W-What?! It's really not what it looks liiiiiiiiiiikeeeee!"
________________________________________
What Kagome had hoped to be a peaceful, comfortable dinner for three turned out to be the exact opposite: it was so awkward, for her at least. While Genos did not seem bothered by what had just transpired, she was still quite flustered. It did not help that the bald man sitting directly across from her had been staring at her non-stop with that blank expression on his face during the entire meal. Even when he was shoveling food into his mouth, he was staring at her relentlessly with those big eyes of his. Even when she tested to see if he was staring at something behind her by scooting to the left and right, those eyes followed her where ever she went. It was so unnerving! She wished that if he had something to say that he would just come out and-
"Oh." Finally, he spoke, a small smile replaced that unnerving blank stare. "You're that maid from yesterday: Kahuna!" He stated triumphantly, as if he just made an exciting discovery!
Kagome slammed her head against the table before glaring at the man sitting across from her, "It's KAGOME, you idiot!"
"Ohhhh, riiiiight," he replied while scratching the back of his head sheepishly. "I knew that I've seen you from somewhere before but I couldn't put my finger on it." With that mystery finally solved, Saitama continued popping slices of savory beef into his mouth.
"You can't be serious…?" Kagome glared at him with a deadpanned tone.
"Do not worry, Kagome," Genos spoke up suddenly. "My Sensei here is a good man. He is just so preoccupied with his daily quotas that his memory fails him sometimes."
"Well, to be honest," Saitama added as he eyed another slice of beef in the pots of goodies. Kagome huffed as she watched his chopsticks reach out to pluck the meat from the brew. The annoyed young woman reached over to the hotpot with her own chopsticks to thwart Saitama's plot of dominating all of the beef strips! "You look like a chick that I banged in a dream once," he said casually. Kagome's chopsticks stopped just short of the beef as she froze. "Oh, cool," he smiled while grabbing the forfeited piece of flesh. "More for me~"
Genos noted Kagome's bright red face and incredulous expression and decided to step up for her, "Sensei, please. It is inappropriate to tease her like that at the dinner table."
Kagome shook her head and crossed her arms, "Thanks but that's not it, Genos."
"Oh? Then you are not upset about Sensei ruining the mood with his perverted humor?"
The answer to the question even piqued Saitama's interested as he stopped picking over the vegetables to stare at Kagome as she played with a lock of her hair, feeling a little embarrassed under the scrutiny of the two men. "No, "She quickly with a small pout at her lips. "I'm upset that he thinks that it was a dream, "she admitted, her eyes settling on the shining table surface as heat rushed to her cheeks at the sound of the two men choking on and spitting out their meal.
The confession even had Genos acting out of character, his pale cheeks now flushed bright red, his blonde hair standing on end, and his eyes widened, "S-S-Sensei, is this the truth?!"
"Uhhhhh…" Saitama scratched his cheek while looking up and away, avoiding Genos' and Kagome's eyes as she did to them. "I guess…it's possible," he concluded with a smile, despite his shock and even hidden embarrassment.
Kagome finally got the courage to look up from the table and at Saitama's face, she was grateful that he was not looking at her back this time. "We met before yesterday…" She said nervously, her voice wavering with embarrassment. Yes, she usually avoided embarrassing situations but this case was different and special to her. She needed to do this. "It was a bit over a year ago…" The two men fell silent as they listened to her story. "I was at a beach party with my friends. Of course, we're in college so a lot of people got drunk. Some jerk hit on me and got rejected so he took my key-ring and threw it into the ocean…"
________________________________________
['Dammit! Why is this happening to me?!' Kagome thought to herself miserably and angrily as she sloshed around in the frigid, dark waters, searching fruitlessly for her lost apartment key. Her so-called "friends" had long gone home or to a guy's house, leaving her on the beach alone well past 3AM. Despite being cold and wrinkly, Kagome's hands continued to search through salty water, sand, slimy weeds, and rock to find that familiar feel of jagged metal. Every minute or so, she would break the surface again to rest her arms and gasp for air. After what felt like hours of scrambling, she decided to call it quits. Her body was not going to tolerate the elements for much longer.
Despite giving up on her futile attempts to find her key, Kagome did not return to her apartment yet. It was not like she could get in anyway. Instead, she opted to sit on the dock and watched the big, white moon command the dark waves to taunt her about her powerlessness. Suddenly, she knew what would make her feel even just a little bit better. The young woman got to her feet, balled up her fist, and screamed as loudly as she could into the silent night. She screamed and screamed out her frustrations and anger about the cruel hand that fate dealt her today.
"Uh… Are you okay?" Came an unfamiliar, masculine voice from behind her.
Kagome screamed again, but this time in fear and not anger, and jumped as she turned quickly to face the stranger, "W-Who are you?!" She asked nervously while looking the man up and down. He had a perfectly bald head that reflected the moonlight, an odd yellow body suit, and a cape. "A cosplayer?" she asked hopefully, silently praying that he was a nerd and not some random pervert.
"Actually, I'm a hero for fun," He replied with a smile, "What are you doing out here so late? And why are you soaked?" he asked, a hint of concern was hidden within that curious tone.
Kagome shook her head and shifted on her feet in an embarrassed manner, "I uh…lost my key in the sea.." she stated skittishly. It was far too personal to tell a stranger about how she was sexually harassed and that's how she ended up losing her key.
"Oh," the stranger's face turned a blank one, "Well, that sucks."
"Yeeeeeaah…" Kagome averted her eyes from him for a moment. That simple reply in that nonchalant tone made her feel awkward somehow.
"Okay, wait here," he commanded nonchalantly. Before she had the chance to even ask him what he was going to do, the hero leapt so high into the air that his bright-yellow suit faded into the darkness of the night sky.
"Uh..what?" She asked dumbly as she gawked up at the stars, wondering just what was going on.
A few seconds later, the swooshing sound of air molecules parting as a high velocity figure dove into the sea. The impact was so great that Kagome was sent flying backwards a few feet but she managed to sea that for a moment, the sea had parted, revealing the sandy, rocky, and weedy floor. If she were not freezing her butt of from being soaked, the young woman would have thought that she was dreaming! Once again, before she had the chance to even process what happened, a red gloved hand took hold of her own and dropped her key into it with a simple, "Here~"
Kagome looked up at the face of the total stranger who dive-punched the ocean to find her lost key. She was beyond astonished, almost speechless. She did not even care that his face was rather goofy looking when plastered onto that egg head of his. All that she knew that if she said nothing, it felt like her heart was going to jump right out of her chest. So she acted on her first impulse, which was to throw her arms around the neck of the man and pour heart out, "Thank you! Thank you so much!"
"Eheh, no problem~ It's what I do," the hero replied while patting the small woman on the head like a child. "Now let's get you home, eh?" That said, the bald man showed her his strong back before squatting down.
"O…okay…" She said unsurely as she climbed onto the stranger's back. Despite living in Z City all of her life, she had never met a hero in person before. While she did not necessarily expect for them all to be snobs, she also did not expect to find one that was so kind-hearted and sweet.
"So…where to?" The bald man asked as he stood up to his full height with Kagome on his back.
"Um…do you knew where Z University is?" She asked back.
"Oh, so you're a college girl," He stated rhetorically as he took off into the night at a speed that was fast, but not fast enough to be put his new charge in danger of falling off. "You look a lot younger" he told her while making small talk.
Kagome merely laughed into his ear, "Yeah, I get that a lot," she told him. She smiled at her reflection in his bald head. Her cheeks were a soft hue of pink and a content smile was on her face. This was definitely the best part of her day. 'I'm sure that not everyone gets the opportunity to spend time with a hero like this… I should make the best of it~' She told herself inwardly as her smile widened at her own thoughts. "Hey, hero?" She asked.
"Hm?" He tried to turn his head and look at her but she clung too closely for there to be much room for movement. "What's up, kiddo?"
Kagome found that it was easy to be open and honest about her feelings when he was unable to look at her face, "You've made my night amazing~ Thank you so much!"
"Eheh, glad that I could be of service," He replied modestly, she could practically hear his smile.
"May I ask a favor of you?" She pressed on.
"Another favor?" He asked in a playful tone. "You're running up quite the tab, missy."
Kagome merely giggled and gently squeezed his shoulders, "you'd have my eternal gratitude~."
"Fine, fine," He sighed as if he were going to deny her request, even though she was sure that he would not have.
"I've dreamed of being able to fly like a bird," She told him. "You're super strong. Wanna help me out?"
"Eh," His tone turned a bit more serious. "That sounds a bit dangerous for a girl like you."
"Oh, come on!" Kagome urged while playfully kicking her legs and lightly pushing on his backside.
"O-Oi!" He called back at her, tightening his grip on thighs, showing that he was actually concerned about dropping her. "Don't be so pushy! I'm the one in charge here!"
Kagome rolled her eyes but smiled nonetheless, "yeah, yeah. Big hero. Blah, blAHHHHHHHHHH!" Suddenly in the middle of her mocking him, the bald man hurled her through the air like a professional American football player would.
Meanwhile Saitama stood there for a moment, watching the young soar through the night air, "Ah…maybe I threw her too hard," he wondered as he watched her small body stay airborne for longer than expected. He shrugged before dashing and leaping into the air to save her life. To his surprise, instead of screaming in terror, the strange woman was laughing her ass off when she landed in his arms bridal-style.
"T-that was awesome!" She exclaimed through her teary eyes and fits of her laughter. She wiped a tear away before smiling up at him. "You're the best!" She told him with a goofy, lop-sided smile, obviously drunk off of her adrenaline rush. Saitama merely stared down at her and laughed as well. "Oh… We're here," she blinked as they landed right in front of her apartment.
"Yup, ride's over," he told her as he sat her down on her feet. He held out a gloved hand and smiled, "Now pay up, missy," he teased, obviously wanting to end their encounter on a light-hearted note.
But Kagome was not ready for their encounter to end.
"Sure," She whispered before quickly leaning up to the man and pressing her soft lips against his. To her surprise, his lips were warm and softer than she expected for a manly hero. And the rest was history…]
________________________________________
Saitama looked completely dumbfounded as Kagome stopped her story before getting into the dirty details,"…huh, so that night wasn't a dream… Weird."
Kagome's dreamy-eyed expression instantly turned into a sour one, "You're the only weird one here…" she said sharply before eyes went aflame, "And stop eating all of the beef, dammit!"
Genos sent a stern look to his mentor and nodded his head in agreement, "Kagome is right, Sensei. I have tallied your total number of meat strips consumed to be at twenty-two. Kagome and I only put thirty in the entire pot."
"Okay, one more then," The bald-headed man stated while reaching for a final-
Kagome dove across the table and slapped the hero's hand like a naughty child, "No more! Save some meat for me, dummy!"
Genos sweat dropped in the background, "I think you mean, save some for us…"
Saitama then turned into serious mode. His facial features becoming sharper and much more devilishly handsome. Kagome's breath hitched into her throat at the face. It was the face that remained the center of her wet dreams for months since that night. "I've got some meat saved for you right he-"
"Don't you dare finish that sentence, you creep!" Kagome screamed with tears in her eyes and her cheeks dyed a deep red as she grabbed Saitama by the collar and shook him senseless, all the while he merely smiled widely and laughed at her expense. Meanwhile Genos watched the pair while taking the last eight pieces of beef for himself. His mentor was laughing in an oddly amused manner as the tiny woman shook him hard to break a normal person's neck. Seeing two people who he liked so much get along made him feel warm and fuzzy inside.
To keep the good mood rolling, the cyborg urged his mentor and Kagome to try to recall more details about their first encounter. The answers from the two were nothing short of hilarious and embarrassing with the two of them taking shots at each other every chance that they could.
"I was only going to make-out with him," Kagome said at one point in a matter-of-fact tone. "He's the one who got hard from a little kissing!" She laughed at the blank face that she received from Saitama.
He then retorted in a monotone voice, "It doesn't take much to get your rocks off."
"H-humph! Says the guy who thought he could please a girl with the pace of a half-dead turtle~"
"Ah," Saitama paused for a moment. She had a point but there was a reasonable explanation for that, "you told me that it was your first ti-"
Once again, Genos found himself choking on his dinner. Kagome was instantly at his side, holding up a cup of warm tea up to his lips and helping him wash down the half-masticated food. The raven-haired woman glared at Saitama who blinked and stared at his disciple with his mouth ajar and eyes wider than usual, "Woah, Genos, you okay?"
"You idiot! That was too-much-information! You almost killed poor Genos!" Kagome scolded him while caressing the cyborg's pale cheek tenderly, a look of concern on her face.
Perhaps it was all the talk of love-making that had went on but just the light touch of her dainty fingers against the cyborg's face sent electric pulses coursing throughout his body. He shivered and unintentionally leaned into her touch.
"Ah, my bad, dude," came his mentor's reply.
Once Kagome determined that the blonde was in no danger of asphyxiating on his meal, she promptly returned to shaking Saitama senseless.
Yes, indeed. It was a wonderful sight to behold someone getting along with and appreciating his mentor as much as he did…
…but it was also somehow oddly uncomfortable. Something about watching them made him feel a bit uneasy. 'I will ask Dr. Kuseno to check my wiring to make sure that nothing is malfunctioning.'
Kagome had no idea how things led up to this but here she was in another odd situation. She was laying on her side in the darkness of a small, cramped living room. Her body was squeezed between her two male companions. Even after Saitama moved the table into the kitchen, the small living area was packed. Okay… There actually was enough place for all three of them to sleep on the floor with elbow room but somehow, night time seemed to be an especially magical time where everything went terribly wrong yet terribly right at the same time.
At first Kagome could not sleep and laid awake on her back while staring up at the unfamiliar ceiling. She spent a lot of time wondering what Saitama and Genos truly thought of her, especially after her confession of their meeting a year ago. At first, she thought that it would be awkward and Saitama would be creeped out that she wanted to get to know him further after that one-night stand. But the hero, nor pupil, seemed to mind her presence at all so she was unconsciously encouraged to stay a lot longer than she intended to.
Even after telling you that we've met before, I still didn't get the chance to tell you everything that was weighing on my mind for an entire year.
Like…for instance… I wanted to tell you about how much I regretted not ever asking for your name or getting a way to keep in touch with you.
I searched and searched for you on the Hero's Association registry and found nothing. I was so confused and disappointed. Even if you didn't feel anything for me romantically, I still wanted to get to know you.
Kagome sighed and closed her eyes, her body naturally shifted uncomfortably as her bottom began to go numb. Instinctively, she turned to her left and laid on that side. Upon opening her eyes, she expected to see Genos' back about a half meter away but instead, she came face-to-face with the cyborg's sleeping …well, face. Her eyes widened as she blushed from their proximity. Sure, she was pretty friendly with him but she was not quite ready to be so close that she could feel his shallow breaths against her lips.
The young woman shut her eyes and then decided to turn and lay on her right side, where Saitama was situated. 'Jeez, Genos… Thanks a lot,' she thought bitterly, not daring to open her eyes quite yet. 'You would end up so close to me like that!' It just was not fair! Even though she did not have any romantic feelings for the cyborg, she was still a young woman, ripen with desires and hormones and in her prime! She was not blind to how astonishingly attractive he was! When he was awake, and interacting with her, it was easy to be his pal and ignore ogling him. When he was sleeping so soundly so close to her…that was an entirely different story. Her mind left to wonder over what her body felt.
"What's wrong? Stomach ache?"
"Eh- Saitama?" She asked, cheeks flushing when her eyes open in response to the sudden voice. "You're awake?"
His signature big eyed, blank stare was her only answer.
"Oh, uh…" She stammered, realizing that he was waiting for an answer. "No, I just…can't sleep…"
"Ah," he propped his head up using his elbow as he continued staring at her. "You're not thinking of jumping my bones again, are you?" He asked with a light-hearted smile.
Kagome's face went beet red as she whisper-shouted, "A-As if! That was a one night thing!"
It was only after the hero laughed that she realized that he was only messing with her again. He smiled and added, "Too bad~ I was looking forward to it too" he teased, expecting another cute reaction that he was becoming more and more fond of.
Instead she took him by surprise by smiling impishly and placing a small hand on his hip, "Well, if you insist…" she trailed down to his inner thigh, "We can give it a go if you can be quiet~"
"O-Oi!" The bald man protested in the quietest voice he could muster as for once; his own cheeks were dyed light shade of red as he glared at the evil young woman lying next to him. "That's playing dirty!" He told her before turning away to face the wall and hide his face. For a moment, he completely lost his usual composure and was actually flustered.
Kagome merely giggled, not feeling bad about teasing one bit. It felt rather goodto get so deeply under his skin. But she decided to be nice and not pursue the matter, "Okay, okay~ I'm sorry~" she said in an appeasing pat him on the back gently to apologize. Though she would never admit it, she would have minded if something actually did happen between them in that moment.
"Kagome, Sensei, I detect that your levels of dopamine, oxytocin, amongst other hormones are increasing at an abnormal rate. Shall I perform a physical exa-"
"G-Go back to sleep, Genos!" Kagome commanded.
Within in an instant, the cyborg was laying back down in his futon with an obedient, "Yes, ma'am."
________________________________________
It was another low-traffic, boring afternoon at Maid Paradise, Kagome's workplace. Despite early afternoons being slow, no one on shift was ever sent home early like workers in fast food companies. So here she was again, sitting unladylike on the front counter where customers came to pay for their meals before leaving, and chatting with her fellow maids about the usual: their favorite heroes. It was only after she reunited with Saitama that Kagome actually found the conversations interesting. Usually she spaced out and pretended to listen to the chatter by smiling and nodding her head in agreement to whatever someone said.
Yuka, a young woman with bone-straight, shoulder-length black hair clapped her hands together as she gushed over the thought of her favorite hero, "I'm so glad that I was off last night! Amai-Mask appeared in a special interview on channel five yesterday!"
Eri, a sweet-hearted woman with naturally wavy hair that Kagome found herself secretly envious of, nodded twice enthusiastically, "I know, right?! He's so beautiful and elegant- like a true prince~" Kagome sighed inwardly despite her outward brilliant smile, she wondered if anyone would ever bring up heroes who she actually cared about: Saitama and Genos. She visited them so often and sometimes stayed over for extended periods of time that she was borderline living with them. She did not need a top three favorite heroes when she already had two who she knew person-
"Kagome-chan! Helloooooo? Are you going to answer?" Eri asked curiously while waving a hand in front of her colleague's face.
Eri then pointed out and giggled when Kagome's face flushed in embarrassment at being caught spacing out, "I bet Kagome-chan got so caught up in the conversation that she daydreamed about her dreamboat~"
The three young women squealed like high school girls at the thought of it. This caught the attention of the three other maids on duty: Koharu, Kagura, and Ayame and the seven maids formed a circle of young women leaning against counters, brooms, or sitting on buckets, chatting about their fantasies.
"So Kagome-chan, who is it~?" Ayame asked in a sharp tone. "It better not be my Speedy Tail!"
Yuka rolled her eyes at the red-haired, pig-tailed maid, "Oh can it. Kagome-chan isn't interested in your Koga guy," She told her while crossing her arms, "Not when heroes like AMAI-MASK EXISTS~!" She added in a dreamy voice.
That was it.
"Enough speaking up for me!" Kagome interjected. "I can speak for myself, thank you very much!"
"Then do it already!" the rest of the maids yelled back at her collectively, causing her to wince at the sheer volume and pitch of their cacophony.
"Fine…" She mumbled while tucking some of her long hair behind her ear. "My favorite heroes are…" She trailed off for a moment, a bead of sweat running down her forehead at the sight of her colleagues slowly inching towards her in anticipation. "…G-Genos and Saitama!"
The café was quiet for a moment…
"…who are they?" came the first whisper.
'Crap…' it felt like a large weight crashed down onto her shoulders when Kagome realized that most people called their heroes by their assigned nicknames! "U-Uh…I mean uh… The Demon Cyborg and…"
Kagome winced again when the group of maids shrieked in perfect unison, all of their eyes glowing brightly as they cupped their hands together.
"The Demon Cyborg… He's so handsome~!"
"And he looks so cool and collected all of the time!"
"I wish he'd look at me with those sexy eyes!"
Kagome huffed, as she did not get to finish telling them about how much she adored Saitama. The group of maids went off on a tangent about how cool and attracted Genos looked. As much as she too liked Genos. She still wanted to talk about… "SAITAMA IS THE COOLEST HERO OF ALL!" She suddenly screamed over everyone with her fists balled up passionately. She did not know what came over here but there it was: her heart on her sleeve. "HE'S STRONG, KIND, AND HANDSOME, EVEN IF HE'S BALD!"
"B-Bald…?"
"Saitama..?"
"She can't mean Caped Baldy, can she?"
"The rank leecher?"
"Mou…" Kagome huffed but resisted the urge to stomp her feet childishly like she did with Saitama. "You should know not to judge someone by rumors before you get to know them! You should act more like adults!" She chastised them with inflated, reddened cheeks.
Ayame smiled and poked Kagome's cheek, deflating the air that was puffing them up, "Look who's talkin', Mrs. Puff~" she teased and her fellow maids joined her for a collective laugh at Kagome's expense.
________________________________________
It was an oddly peaceful day in Z city today. No dangerous leveled threats were terrorizing the citizens like they usually did. No random villains crashing through the ceiling to challenge Saitama or Genos. It was a perfect day…too perfect. It was a nice, quiet day that mainly consisted of Saitama slouching around with a manga and Genos catching up on housework. All was calm and right until…
{Knock, knock}
The blonde cyborg peered at his mentor from the kitchen door, "Sensei, I believe that Kagome has come to visit us again." Genos stood there for a moment with a mop in hand before he heard another pair of soft knocks at the front door. "Shall I let her in, Sensei?"
Saitama scratched his head before hopping to his feet, "Nah, it's cool. I got it." He felt like getting under her skin by making her knock at least two hundred times before he answered, but with how earnest Genos was…he would never be able to pull off that troll with his disciple around. "Yeah, yeah…" He almost groaned as he unlocked and opened the door.
Kagome was still dressed her maid costume as she greeted him with an alluring, coy smile while squirming in a timid manner, "H-how…may I serve you today, Master?" She asked before slowing batting her eyelashes.
For a moment, she felt victorious as he stared at her with wide eyes and slightly ajar lips…
"…goodbye," was his reply as he moved to swing the door closed.
"Wait, a sec!" Kagome shrieked as she threw her feet in the door at the last second. "I was kidding, jeez!"
Saitama stared at Kagome with his blank, goofy face.
Kagome stared at Saitama with her pouty, puffy face.
Genos looked between them both with his typical, focused face.
"Well? What is it this time?"
"What's that supposed to mean?"
"You show up whenever you have a bad day."
"H-Hey, not true!"
"Sensei, she is correct. Kagome shows up good moods very often."
Saitama looked uninterested as he picked his nose with one hand and held up his manga in the other.
Kagome's pouted deepened, "I want you to come to Maid Paradise."
"Nope," the bald man replied while turning a page.
Genos held up his hand like a child in a classroom, "I am willing to visit your work place, Kagome."
Kagome laughed sheepishly as her eyes shifted from side to side as she tried to think of the kindest way to put her next thought, "Well uh…I actually don't need you to come, Genos."
Instantly, the cyborg deflated and his bangs shielded his eyes and he fell into a depression.
"W-Well, that doesn't mean that I don't want you there though!" Kagome added in as her arms flailed about. "You're naturally invited if I invite Saitama!"
Genos' head immediately lifted as he returned to normal rather quickly. When it came to Saitama and Kagome, this particular cyborg was easily pacified.
Kagome then turned her attention back to Saitama, she clapped her hands together and smiled brightly, "So? How about it, Tama?" She put a sweet emphasis on the new nickname.
The bald man did not seem phased by the nickname at all as he did not look up from his manga, "Genos can go. That place looks expensive. I'm not made of money."
"…I'll make your entire meal free," Kagome said.
"What day and time?!" He suddenly was on his feet with balled up fists.
"Tomorrow, 1:30PM~" Kagome smiled as she made her own determined fists.
"Sensei, you fell for her bait hook, line, and sinker."
The maid then waved Genos off, "come on now~ All is fair in love and war! Let's go celebrate!"
"Is today a special occasion?"
"Of course! It's "Kagome Conquered Saitama Day"!"
________________________________________
"Eh… You okay?" Saitama asked Kagome, who was sitting on a stool next to him with deeply flushed cheeks and hazy eyes. When he saw the young woman wobbly from side to side, he placed a hand on her shoulder to steady her, "Oi! You had too much!"
Kagome merely groaned as if she were tired before turning to her left to look at her companions. "I…did…NAWT!" She exclaimed in a slurred protest. "You're not having fun…?" She glared at him and pouted as usual.
The bald man gently swished his drink around in his tiny, shot glass and replied, "Meh, ever since I became this strong, it takes a lot longer for me to get buzzed."
Kagome frowned as she leaned over and wrapped her arm around Saitama's shoulder and whined, "Mou, superhumans like you are no fun!" She then looked beyond him over to Genos, who was sitting to Saitama's left and two stools away from her. "Nee, Genos… Are you as alcohol tolerant as Tama here?"
The cyborg looked over at her, his normally pale cheeks had a slight red tinge to them, "As a cyborg, I too require a large amount of alcohol to become intoxicated, but it is not impossible."
Kagome grinned cheekily at hearing that and leaned further on Saitama until her torso was sprawled across his lap. She ignored his signature "Oi!" that he used to get her attention or protest against her to give Genos a toothy smile and raise a toast to him with her ½ full shot glass.
"That's what I like to hear~ Drink up with me! You're the best, Genos!" She encouraged him.
That encouragement, praise, and smile was all that the blond needed to proceed tossing back shot after shot while the remained in Saitama's lap, clapping and cheering for the cyborg gleefully. "Go, Genos! Go!"
"Are you even allowed to get drunk, dude? It won't scramble your circuits?"
"…..I assure you that my body is strong enough to hiccup handle something as hiccup trivial as liquor."
Kagome giggled and fist pumped the air, "That's the spirit, Geny! You're awesome!" She then looked up at Saitama's blank expression, "not like this stick in the mud," she added sourly while glowering at him.
Saitama merely sighed and smiled while patting her head, "You're such a brat."
Kagome pouted before laying her head down in his lap. The hero tensed when her cheek landed on a rather personal area. "Tama…can I ask you something?"
"You're going to ask no matter what I say."
"S-Sensei…hiccup…you should take it easy on he-ccup every once in a while…"
Saitama gritted his teeth and glared at the blond, "Don't side with this brat!"
"Saitama…" Kagome whispered while tugging on his shirt, successfully bring his attention back to her. "…i-is a citizen girl like me no good?" She asked in a soft voice. The hero-for-fun found himself almost speechless at the sight of her deep, tender-looking eyes.
"Eh?"
"Or do you prefer women who look more mature?" She asked with a small pout on her lips. She continued asking questions without waiting for answers, "Do you really hate my job that much? …Am I not girlfriend material to you? Would dating someone like me be too embarrassing?"
For once Saitama felt caught off guard, even flustered. If his two companions were not wasted, they would have noticed that he was blushing the way Kagome usually was from his teasing. He looked left and right to make sure that no one was around to witness his embarrassment. Fortunately, the only other person inside of the small, adult lounge was the bartender, a much older gentleman who was too busy cleaning glasses to notice their conversation, or just "heard it all" before so didn't care.
"I-Idiot, what are you going on about so suddenly?!" The hero asked as he pulled the woman off his lap with one hand and placed her back onto her stool. Despite his annoyance at her antics, he still had the heart to hold her steady by her shoulder.
"Sensei…hiccup…" Genos completely turned his body so that it was facing Kagome and Saitama. His hands were resting on each leg as fists. Despite his red cheeks and occasional hiccups, Genos maintained his usual expression, "I too am curious about how you feel about Kagome. Please answer us."
Kagome giggled as she slumped against Saitama again, "See~? Even Genos wants to know! Tell us, Tama~!"
"Sensei, please…" The intoxicated cyborg began to imitate Kagome in whining to her way to victory.
"Tama…" she tugged on his shirt. "Tama. Tama. Tama. Hey, Tama. Tammmmmaaaaaaaa."
"Sensei. Sensei. Sensei. Sensei. Sensei." He tugged relentlessly at the other side of Saitama's shirt.
Saitama found himself becoming more and more annoyed by the obnoxious duo who was double-teaming him into submission.
"Taaammmaaa! Tammmmaaaa!"
"Senseiiiiiiii. Seeeeeenseeeei."
More and more angry veins popped out of his shining forehead.
"ENOUGH, YOU IDIOTS! I CAN'T BELIEVE THAT YOU'RE THIS DAMN ANNOYING!"
Genos then shrunk away with his head bowed in shame and dejection, "Y-Yes, Sensei…"
Once his disciple was taken care of, Saitama then turned his attention to Kagome who was leaning her forehead against his shoulder, grumbling about something incoherently. "As for you!" He continued to yell while lifting her chin up by one thumb to force her eyes to meet his. His usual comical face suddenly transformed into a more serious and defined, chisel form. "You want to know?" He asked in a voice so low that it made Kagome shiver in delight. She nodded slowly as she was too entranced by his face to speak.
Even in her drunken haze, Kagome instinctively leaned up closer to Saitama's face as his slowly closed the distance between them more and more. She closed her eyes and awaited the soft contact that she had no felt in a year.
{DOINK!}
Saitama flicked her forehead, causing the young woman to squeak in surprise. "H-Hey! You're such a tease!" She glared up at him as her eyes clearly burned with disappointment. She groaned and wobbled as he pulled her to her feet with one hand.
"Time to go," He announced before looking at Genos, who was still lamenting over his mentor exploding at him, "You okay to walk, dude?"
The cyborg attempted to nod his head affirmatively but instead ended up face planting onto the hard bar counter surface, creating a small crater in the marble.
Saitama stared at his disciple with a blank expression, "…I'm not paying for that."
Man… Kagome was a bad influence on Genos. Never before had the cyborg been such a pain in the ass.
'But…it's become a lot more fun too…' The bald hero thought to himself as he tucked each of his companions beneath his armpits like sacks of potatoes. He looked down at the maid who grinned up at him with a large, toothy smile and smiled. 'You annoying girl…'
________________________________________
Saitama carefully laid (the passed-out) Kagome down onto the spare futon that Genos had purchased especially for her visits. He removed her frilly maid headband and then her dress shoes. 'Genos must be rubbing off on me,' he thought to himself when he noticed how he was working hard to make sure that she was comfortable. His dark eyes settled on her stock-covered legs… They looked skin tight and probably uncomfortable to sleep in. He swallowed a lump in his throat as he stared at her thighs. His fingers grabbed a loose hold of the hems of her stockings that clung tighter to her skin due to the light layer of sweat that coated her body from her intoxication.
He mentally cursed his body's and memory's timing as his hands being so close to her nether regions brought back memories of that faithful. It was just not the hours of passion that came to his mind. It was scenes that seemed to have faded from his mind over time that suddenly flooded back to him…
________________________________________
[ The night was hot and sticky with the heat of summer and humidity of the summer. Superhuman abilities be damned. There was nothing worse than a sleepless summer night without air conditioning! Even sleeping naked did his body no justice. "It's HOT!" He shouted in frustration while kicking his hot futon away from him.
'I need to cool off…'
That thought led him to pulling on his uniform and heading towards the closest 24-hour store. He was dying for a popsicle! The bald hero even took his time strolling through the empty aisles to bask in the cool comfort of the air-conditioned, brightly lit store. It was not intentional but upon exiting the store, he happened to overhear the banter of a group of young men who was hanging around the store's entrance with clearly nothing to do but talk and talk.
"So you struck out with that Higurashi chick, huh?"
"Yeah," another replied in angry tone before he laughed, "But I got her back by throwing her keyring in the friggin ocean!"
Saitama paused in his strides and licking of his treat to listen closer.
"Wow, you're a dick!"
"That's awesome!"
"Ch'yeah, I know. And I heard that she has no roommate or family nearby so she's probably still out there at the beach looking for them!"
"Didn't the tide come in by now?"
"Oh…yeah… Oh well, maybe she drow-…"
The young man then gulped nervously when he was suddenly overshadowed by a slightly older looking man with a look that could almost literally kill. "You…" Saitama nearly seethed as he placed his hand on the sweating guy's shoulder, "That girl you were talking about… Which beach is she on?"
The young man looked around at his friends, who were all glaring at their unwelcomed guest, and suddenly felt confident that their numbers would keep him safe. "What's it to ya?!"
In under sixty seconds, Saitama got the information that he needed and he took off in a mad dash in the direction of the beach. He left the group of college boys lying on the ground unconscious and bruised. His half-eaten popsicle was melting on top of the head of the man who boasted about taking revenge on a woman who rejected him…
The hero would have preferred that the woman had gone somewhere else but the fact that she supposedly had nowhere to go unnerved him. He had to at least go and look! Within a matter of minutes, Saitama had arrived at the beach that the guys claimed to have been. The entire area that would have been covered in sand during the day was submerged already. He would have given up on searching until he heard a feminine voice screaming out in frustration.
That was his cue.
The hero jumped into the air and landed on a dock, the source of the angry screams. And there she was… A young girl in a light blue sundress decorated with a sunflower pattern. Her hair was long, dark and trickled down to her waist. "Uh… Are you okay? He asked her. It was actually pretty amusing to witness her nearly jump out of her skin as she turned to face him.
It was one of the best nights that he had in a long time. Where he found no joy or excitement in fighting villains anymore, he somehow found a sort of warmth in the short time that he spent with this young woman- who he had mistaken for a high schooler. Ordinarily, he would have pegged her as obnoxious for being so familiar, demanding, and expecting of a complete stranger. But this one was different from most civilians.
She took his claim to be a hero at face value and seemed to relish in it. Her eyes sparkled when she looked at him and she seemed thrilled to be around him. Best of all, she was appreciative of the favor that he had done for her. Saitama found himself smiling and complying to every request and demand that she asked of him. It was hard not doing what someone so cute and sweet wanted. After he let her experience what she called "flying", she clung to him even harder, though there was no way that she was hurting him or making him comfortable.
"Hey, Hero…" The blue-eyed woman said to get his attention.
He looked down at her, "Yeah?"
"This was the best night ever~" She told him while smiling brightly. "I'll always appreciate what you've done for me! You took the time to help someone like me…" She trailed off for a moment before beaming again. "Thanks again. I love you~!"
His eyes widened and he looked up ahead of him to hide his pink tinted cheeks. "Anytime," he replied, trying to sound cool and retain her positive image of him. He decided to forgive her for being so bratty and not hiding that she was sniffing him while in his arms.]
________________________________________
Saitama smiled fondly at the memory as he peeled and pulled the slightly damp stockings down from her legs and carelessly tossed them away. Genos, who had already recovered from his bout of intoxication, dutifully collected the pieces of Kagome's costume that his mentor discarded without much thought. For once, the cyborg did not speak his mind. He silently watched his teacher take care of the young with a hidden fascination. It did not take a genius like Dr. Kuseno to deduct that even though he did not care to show it directly, Saitama was just as smitten with Kagome as she was with him.
The blond then placed a hand to his breast plate and left it there. 'What is this tightness that I am feeling?' He wondered as Saitama finally tucked Kagome neatly into her futon. 'My body has been experiencing very peculiar symptoms as of late. Perhaps I am in need of another maintenance.' After deciding to check-in with his doctor and father-figure, Genos proceeded to head to bathroom to hand wash Kagome's sweaty stockings.
________________________________________
Kagome slowly blinked her blurred vision away. She was staring up at a familiar ceiling: the one in Saitama's and Genos' living room. 'Why…am I here…?' She thought to herself before groaning at an intense pain in her head. "Tama…" she groaned out while sitting up slowly in her futon. "Genos?" She looked around and listened for the sound of anyone but discovered the apartment to be empty. "Oh… Huh…?" She blinked and noticed a plate sitting on the small dining table. The achy woman crawled across the small floor space.
A piece of paper that was folded in half to form a tent-shaped note that stood on its own was sitting there. "My name is written on it…" She said to herself. She flipped the note open and read it, "Kagome, you're a light weight. Saitama." Her eye twitched and read a second part to the note, "I left you some pain medication, herbal tea, and lunch in the refrigerator. I took the liberty of calling your manager and told him that you needed the day off. I hope that you recover from your imminent hangover. Genos." She smiled at the note before heading to the kitchen to eat her lunch.
'Oh…it's 5 already…' She thought to herself with wide eyes. 'How long was I sleeping?!' The young woman would have been freaking out over missing work but she trusted that Genos handled those affairs for her. She did not remember much about the night before besides that she promised to treat her two best friends to a meal at Maid Paradise. 'I guess we need to reschedule that…' she thought to herself. 'Oh well.' With a shrug, she decided to make the most of her evening off~ She drew herself a hot bath and decided to relax before getting started on dinner.
'Maybe I should go all out tonight to thank them for taking care of me again,' she mused before sinking beneath the surface of the water. 'Yeah, Saitama has been working hard lately… I'll help him out~"
A few hours later the heroic duo finally returned home after a long, drawn-out meeting for S classed heroes that Saitama was once again dragged into it. The bald hero spent the majority of the meeting spacing out and tapping his foot anxiously, as if he had Restless Leg Syndrome. "Genos, next time there's a meeting you S ranks…don't invite me," he commanded as the cyborg followed his idol into their apartment.
The blond bowed his head respectfully while closing his eyes, "Yes, Sensei. My apologies. I assumed th-"
Saitama held up a gloved hand to signal his pupil to be silent. "Hold that thought- What's that smell?"
Genos closed his eyes and inhaled the lovely aroma filling the room, "I believe that Kagome has dinner prepared." His eyes shot open at the sound of an overly confident, feminine laugh.
There in the kitchen door stood Kagome with a triumphant, almost cocky grin on her face and her hands on her hips. "It's not just dinner, my dear Genos~ It's our feast!" She announced with pride.
Instead of smiling and thanking her for being a sweetheart like she had envisioned, Saitama glowered at her as he walked towards the kitchen, "Oiiii…" he grumbled, "Is that my favorite hoodie?!"
She blinked and looked down at her attire: a baseball styled gray and red hoodie complete with the word "OPPAI" and a pair of cartoony breasts imprinted on the front. "Yeah," she replied innocently before tilting her head to the side, "Why?"
Saitama stood straight and tall above her to emphasize their difference in height and build. He placed his hands on his hips as he frowned down at her and scolded, "I get that we're close but aren't you getting too cozy around here?"
Kagome returned his glare with one of her own and a small pout, "well, my uniform was dirty and I didn't have a change of clothes."
"You could have called," The bald man insisted, raising his voice slightly and adding a bit of sternness to his tone. "You always seem to find a way to reach me. Now bow your head, "he commanded as his face became more serious.
Genos frowned, feeling concerned about the situation that was unfolding in front of him. "S-Sensei, I think that scolding her is good enough! He spoke up from his spot a few meters away from them.
Saitama looked over at his pupil, his face still serious, "You being soft on her only enables her," he pointed out, causing Genos' eyes to wide before he shrunk away to mull over his sensei's words. "Brace yourself, Kagome."
The young woman shut her eyes and kept her head bowed as she waited for the impact: a bop on the head, a flick to her forehead, or a pinching of her cheeks- she was used to Saitama "punishing" her with things like that whenever she "crossed the line". For a moment, there was nothing but silence until she finally felt a strong hand rubbing the top of her head gently. "Permission to use granted."
"!" Kagome's eyes shot open along with her mouth as she tried to express her frustration in being misled but the playful smile on Saitama's face left her with nothing words caught in her throat.
"Dinner's in here, right?" Saitama asked curiously while attempting to walk past Kagome to enter the kitchen. He was halted by a small hand clutching his sleeve. He looked down at the small woman whose cheeks were red and eyes stared up at him, as big and wide as a doe's.
"You two just relax at the table," Kagome's blushed intensified as she spoke. "Tonight, is entirely on me!" She told him while giving her chest a light thump of her fist.
"Okay," He gave in easily, feeling lazy after a long, boring day anyway. "What's on the menu?"
"You'll see~" She chimed while skipping happily into the kitchen, the slight raising of her legs giving Saitama a glimpse of her pink, silky panties. Saitama twitched and immediately turned away to sit at the dining table across from Genos.
After a couple of minutes of Kagome scurrying hastily back and forth between the kitchen and the dinner table, the feast was finally spread across the center of the table. Saitama stared at the assortment of dishes with wide eyed, blank face. "There we go~ We can start now!" She announced after setting a whole, baked chicken down in front of Genos.
"What are you up to?" Saitama asked while raising an eyebrow suspiciously at her.
"Sensei, I believe that Kagome is simply trying to do kind deed for us," Genos chimed in.
"That's right~ I'm just that type of person~" Kagome beamed at her blond friend.
"Traitor," Saitama mumbled as he began filling his plate with a bit of everything.
"Quiet, you~" Kagome nearly sang as she watched her friends all of her dishes. Sure, she spent more than she normally would on food today but it was worth it! She really wanted to spoil them for all of the times that they indulged her and her antics~
"May I have something to drink?" Saitama suddenly asked while looking at her.
"Eh- Right! I forgot the tea!" She exclaimed while lightly bonking herself on the head. "I'll be right back, okay~?" She asked rhetorically while jumping to her feet and scampering back into the kitchen to fetch their beverages. Meanwhile Genos silently analyzed his sensei's actions as the bald man openly stared at the woman as she exited and re-entered the room with a tray in her hands. "Sorry the wait~" She apologized with a smile as she placed three cups on the table and began distributing the tea.
"Kagome," Genos suddenly called for her attention as she handed Saitama his cup.
"Hm?" She simply asked, smiling down at the cup but still actively listening to the cyborg.
"I analyzed Sensei's behavioral and biological patterns and have concluded that he is most stimulated when you are in his clothing," He stated informatively and rather bluntly as he accepted his cup of tea.
"Sppfft!" Saitama spat his tea out as Kagome's eyes lit her up and she cupped her hands. "G-Genos!" the exposed hero protested while throwing his follower a warning glare.
"Is that so?" She asked in awe. She then turned to look at Saitama with a cattish smile, "So that's your kink, huh~?" She teased while giggling behind her hand.
"It is not, b-baka!" The bald man stammered a bit as he looked away, trying to hide his blush.
"On the contrary, Sensei," Genos interjected. "I observed that youhave stared at her 350% more than usual tonight. Your heart rate has also accelerated mor-"
"Genos…" Saitama mumbled in a dark tone as his facial expression became grave. "Do you want to be punched?" He asked in a deep voice.
Genos sweated a bit and looked a bit startled, "No, Sensei-!"
Kagome laughed as she leaned over and patted Saitama's shoulder, "Don't worry, Tama~" she said in reassuring tone, "There's nothing to be embarrassed about!"
"I am not emb-!"
She then placed her hands on her cheeks, blushing a bit as she smiled affectionately. A sparkly background appearing as she added, "It's okay to love me~"
Genos raised his and voiced his opinion, "I concur! Sensei and Kagome would make a great cou-"
Before the two continue double-teaming him, the bald man grabbed one of their cheeks with each hand and gave them both a slight pinch, "Cut it out, you two. Your alliance needs to end here and now."
Kagome groaned as she rubbed her reddened cheek, "Jeez, you need to learn to take a joke, Tama!"
Saitama replied bluntly, "You may say that but Genos, here," he gestured at the cyborg with his thumb, "Is dead serious. I don't even knowif he's capable of joking."
"Actually, Dr. Kuseno has used his genius to ensure that I am capable of all ordinary human activities, including humorous endeavors," Genos explained while raising a finger. "Observe. Knock, knock."
Kagome beamed and played along, "Who's there~?"
"I am," He concluded, his voice and face as calm as ever.
Kagome faltered as Saitama sweatdropped and stated," I don't think that's how that works, dude."
Kagome gave her best considerate laugh before she noticed Saitama chewing on a baked chicken leg…and the boney remains of the other leg sitting on his plate. "Hey now! I wanted the other leg, Tama!" She exclaimed with almost watery eyes.
"Oops."
"No, oops! You always hog- Oomph!" Her complaining was cut short by Saitama casually pushing the remainder of the leg into her mouth. She glared at him but chewed on it, instantly feeling satisfied by the gesture.
Genos watched the scene unfold with a small smile. Once again, he found that he was touched that his sensei had found someone who cared about him and who he obviously cared for in return. He almost pointed out how Saitama was a bit of hypocrite with how he scolded his follower for always pampering this young woman when he too was always quick to give into her blue eyes. Still…his chest felt oddly tight despite that all of his systems were green and functioning properly.
________________________________________
I know that I wormed my way into your lives.
I know that acted informally with you right away, without really having the right to.
I know that I took advantage of your kindness so many times.
But I'm sorry, I didn't mean to, honestly.
I was just acting on my feelings and listening to my heart.
And my heart told me that I wanted to be with you.
Saitama grew silent as he continued reading the end of the letter in his head as it became more and more intimate. Nothing in the letter was particularly shocking or eye-opening to him, but he pressed on and read it in its entirety.
I noticed that lately our relationship has become a bit ambiguous.
I don't know if you feel the way but that's how it feels to me.
I'm probably being presumptuous but…
I feel like you might feel the same way that I do.
But you've been holding back while I've been pushing forward.
I'm sorry for acting so selfishly and nothing of what you want more often.
The hero stiffened as he read the next part of the letter. He did not expect her to be so observant and to know him so well… 'I should have known that she'd know me… She's been watching me all of this time.'
I wonder if you're holding back because you're afraid of dragging me into danger.
Or maybe you're holding back because you don't want to hurt Genos…
Don't worry. I feel the same way.
I love Genos too. I don't want to see him hurt either.
So I feel uneasy about moving forward sometimes, knowing how he feels about me.
You two are so sweet together. Genos is my little cinnamon roll and you're my /u/ !
Saitama stifled a laugh at Kagome's use of a cute emoji instead of an actual noun to describe him.
I don't to ruin your friendship.
So that's why I decided to move on.
"…" Saitama was unaware of how his face visibly paled. Genos however detected his massive fluctuation in heart rate. "That…idiot..." He whispered, feeling an intense concoction emotions that no one person ever elicited from him at once.
You know how I just graduated last week, right?
Well, I decided that I'm going to start my life anew somewhere~
I'm not sure where I'll go or what I'll do yet but I'm sure that it'll be fun~
I got the feeling that you two would try to stop me so that's why I'm telling this via letter.
First… Let me say what I wanted to on the day of our reunion…
"Genos…" Saitama whispered, "I'll be back. Take care of lunch while I'm gone."
"Wait, Sensei," The cyborg suddenly called out as his mentor opened the front door.
"What's up? I'm in a hurry," Saitama blinked and asked curiously.
"You and Kagome…don't have to be considerate of me," the young man stated. "Besides Dr. Kuseno, you two are the most important people in the world to me… Ever since I lost my family, I thought that I was alone-"
"Twenty words or less, dude."
"R-Right!" Genos gave his sensei a thumbs-up, "Go get her." Before adding a small smirk appear on his face, "But just know that I will work hard to catch up to your strength and I will steal her away."
Saitama merely smiled at the cyborg and half joked, half challenged with a thumbs-up of his own, "We'll see about that." And with that, he took off in a rush towards the train station. According to the letter that she had written a few days prior, he had about an hour before her train arrived. 'Kagome, I'm coming.'
Did I ever get to ask you if you were embarrassed to date a civilian?
'You did. You were just too drunk to remember.' The hero raced until he was out on a busy street with countless vehicles zooming by. He easily leaped from car roof to car roof as he rushed around the city to find Kagome. His first destination was the train station to check if she may have gone there early.
Hehheh, I know that I'm probably too weak to stand by your side.
But if you'd let me, I would be, forever and ever.
'What do you think I've been doing all of this time, baka?' He mentally asked her, as if she could hear his thought from where ever she was.
If only I could travel back in time*, I'd go and relive these years all over again.
You'd think that I would told you how I felt after all of this time.
Even though I acted confident and flirted with you a lot, I was still nervous about it.
The truth is…
Saitama grunted as his eyes scanned left, right, up, and down and he searched high and low for Kagome in the crowds upon crowds of busy commuters. It did not help that she was a bit short for her age!
Saitama, I'm your biggest fan.
I've absolutely adored you ever since the night that we first met.
________________________________________
Kagome sighed as she sat idly on the dock where she first met Saitama. The tides were low so her legs that swung over the edge of the platform could not reach the surface of the water. Sitting next to her was her small suitcase of her essential worldly belongings: some clothing and other personal items. She smiled wistfully down at the strip of photos from a photo booth that she, Saitama, and Genos once squeezed into after she gave them her infamous puppy eyes. Her blues eyes misted up before tears pelted the slick surface of the photos one by one.
The top photo was a normal one where Kagome smiled brightly; Saitama yawned; and Genos stared directly at the lens calmly. The second photo asked them to act surprise: Kagome placed her hands on her cheeks and opened her mouth to simulate "The Scream"; Saitama's face had big, bulging eyes; and Genos stared at the lens calmly. The next one the machine instructed them to make silly faces so Saitama crossed his eyes while Kagome grabbed the edges of Genos' mouth and stretched them out into a huge, creepy smile as she stuck her tongue playfully. Finally, Kagome's face was complete red as her companions who were sitting on each side of her both kissed her cheeks, as the machine suddenly instructed.
'At least…I'll always have this. I'll be able to see their faces every day,' She comforted herself inwardly before a cruel, powerful gust of sea wind swooped in and snatched the photo strip free from her hand. "Eh?! No!" She shouted as she stared in shock at her souvenir danced happily as it was carried up and away by the wind. "You gotta be kidding me!" She shouted while stomping her feet. For a moment, she was angry…but that anger was soon replaced by a wave of sorrow. It did not matter if anyone saw or heard her. She wept openly and loudly. Her hands covered her eyes but those small hands could not hide the endless trails of tears that poured that streamed down her face. 'Why is it that I only feel lucky when I'm with Saitama and Genos?' She asked the gods miserably.
"Jeez, you really ought to take better care of your things," a familiar voice said calmly from behind her.
'No way-' Her midnight sky colored hair cascaded around her as she whipped to face the voice head on. "Sai…tama…" She whispered as her red, puffy eyes stared at him in disbelief. It felt like she was dreaming, just as on that fateful night. But it was real, and so was he.
Saitama shook his head at her while smiling and holding up her precious photo strip between two fingers, "You want it, don't you?" She nodded quietly while wiping her tears away as he approached her. He smiled warmly as he held her precious souvenir out to her. Kagome gave a small, watery smile as her hand slowly reached for-
"Eek!"
{SPLASH}
Kagome gasped for air as she resurfaced then cringed at the taste of salty water in her mouth. She glared up at the hero who was standing at the edge of the dock, smiling casually at her. "What was that for, you jerk?!" She shouted as she extended her arm towards him. He complied and reached down to grab her hand and pull her back onto the dock with ease.
"That was punishment for being stupid," He replied simply while grabbing her suitcase and walking away from her.
Kagome huffed and glared at his back before running to catch up to him, "What do you mean stupid?!"
"Well," The egg head explained, "You left a runaway note and told exactly when you'd be running away. You were practically begging to be caught."
Her cheeks darkened as she retorted, "I was not! I was just…I didn't think that you'd come looking for me…" her voice trailed off as she stared at the ground.
But it's not just that one night that I'm talking about.
I'm grateful for all of the time that you've spent with me.
I'm grateful for all of the times that let me stay with you with no questions asked.
I'm grateful for how many times you've walked me home from work.
All of it…everything that you could possibly think of- I'm grateful for.
Saitama looked up at the sky to avoid her gaze, even though she was walking behind him with her head down. "Well uh…" He began, not realizing that he was blushing a bit as he spoke, "How could I just let you go after you sent me that letter?" Kagome groaned aloud as she covered her face with her hands. "Besides I still owe you an ass-kicking on Manlio Kart** for all the times you cheated," he added.
"I did not cheat! You just suck ass at steering!"
I'm grateful to the gods for allowing me to meet you.
Saitama…you're…
"Ahhhh," The bald man suddenly sighed aloud. "You walk too slowly," he said before crouching down to the ground. "Hop on. We need to get you dry quickly or you'll catch a cold."
Kagome raised an eyebrow, "even though you're the one who got me all wet in the first place?" she asked while climbing onto his back.
He grinned cheekily over his shoulder at her and teased, "Hot."For setting herself up for that jole, he smiled inwardly and once again, forgave her for blatantly inhaling his scent and sighing deeply, as if she was drunk off of him.
"Oh, shut up, baldy!" Kagome huffed before laughed when he threatened to throw her off if she said that one more time. "There's no way that you'd seriously let me get hurt so I'm not afraid~"
"What makes you so sure?" He asked while glaring up ahead, still annoyed at being called bald.
The woman on his back tightened her grip around his neck as she leaned close to his ear. The light feeling of her breath sent delicious tingles down his spine. "Because," she whispered, "you're my hero…"
________________________________________
[Omake]
"Uh… Tama… what's going on here?"? Kagome asked as she blinked down at the single futon laying in the middle of the living room floor. "Where's Genos?" She questioned while propping open her suitcase to find some dry clothes to wear.
"Oh, I found a note," He said casually.
"What does it say?" She asked, temporarily abandoning her clothes to stand by Saitama's side.
"Sensei, Kagome… I have prepared a futon for you, fore I presume that you will want to copulate upon your return. The lunch that you requested is in the refrigerator. I will return by 6PM to give you enough time… Genos." Saitama's eye twitched as he finished reading. "That guy-… Ah?"
Kagome nibbled on her bottom lip cutely as she stared up at him with seductively timid eyes, "Well, if that's what you want," she whispered as she closed her eyes and leaned up towards her hero's face- "Kyaa!" -only to have Saitama hold her back with one finger to her forehead. "Hey! We have his permission, baka!" She exclaimed while pouting.
Saitama stifled a laugh before he smiled at her regardless, "You're such a dork."
"That's my line!" She pouted while crossing her arms. "You know you want me," she mumbled.
"Do you want me to break your back that badly?" He asked, tilting his egg-shaped head with a goofy face on.
Kagome pretended to mull over the question for a moment... "Maybe…"
"Fine," Saitama replied, giving into that youthful, sweet face that he came to love. He crossed his arms and stated firmly, "But first, you must service me to prove how badly you want it."
Kagome nodded enthusiastically as she began to unzip his body suit to reveal his muscular physique. "Yes, Master~" She replied submissively as she got onto her knees and set his hot rod free.
Saitama's serious face almost broke as he felt himself twitch and stand at attention after hearing her say that. 'Okay…' he admitted to himself. 'That was hot.'
________________________________________
Authoress' Notes:
* Did I succeed in irony? ( o u o)' cause that's what I was aiming for...
**This was a shameless reference to the hilarious game in Limitless Musing's "Kazoku" : s/11621063/1/Kazoku
*** This may have been better as a series of smaller drabbles buuuuuut since I don't know how long I'll be actively writing, I just went for a longer, one-shot ~
I probably ruined the cute ending that I was aiming for with this omake…but oh well. can't fight the right side of my brain!
I hope you all enjoy reading~ If enough people ask for it, I'll write the sequel that I've been thinking of ~
If not, oh well! I had a blast just writing this one ^ u ^
Title: My Hero
Category: Anime/Manga » Inuyasha
Author: The Amazing Sakumachan
Language: English, Rating: Rated: M
Genre: Romance/Humor
Published: 04-16-17, Updated: 04-16-17
Chapters: 1, Words: 21,253
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Chapter 1: My Hero
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Summary: Saitama and Genos receive a box of fan mail. Meanwhile, a dreamy-eyed maiden hopes that her number one hero will read her letter. (One-Shot)
Authoress' Notes: This came out weirder and longer than expected. But hey- an idea comes and my fingers move. Enjoy if you can~ ; w ; I know that it's waaaaaaay too long but it just kind of happened! As a warning, try to read it with an open mind because I wrote it the way that I envisioned an anime episode featuring this story would be like...if that makes sense _ I hope that it's not too hard to follow!
Pairings: Uhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh… kind of Saitama x Kagome x Genos? Idk what I'm doing here.
Rating: M for some language and subbbbbttttllllee mature themes!
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[ My Hero ]
Genos was almost speechless from the anticipation that was hidden behind his stony, amber eyes at the sheer number of letters inside of the huge, box that was airmailed from the Hero's Association. Saitama whistled to express that he was rather impressed. "Wow," the older of the two young men's tone did not change from its usual casual as he commented at the small mountain of fan mail, "that's quite the haul this time."
The cyborg gave a curt nod as he began to sort and sift through them, "You are right." He replied as he meticulously created two separate piles: one for him and one for mentor. "But we both have much more active lately so it is to be expected."
Although he did not get his hopes up, Saitama smiled a bit and asked with a small hint of excitement to his voice, "Hey, any for me this time?" Although the letters were numerous, Genos' spectacular reading ability made the sorting job simpler and quicker than any human would be able to.
"There is one, sensei," Genos replied as he turned away from his pile of fan mail to hand his mentor the one piece of mail that was addressed to him.
"Thanks, dude," Saitama said graciously as he accepted and gazed down at his letter with a bit of fascination.
Genos was as anxious as his mentor to find out the contents of the letter, so much that he paid his own mail no mind for the time being. He was on edge from remembering a time not long ago when his sensei received a terrible, angry letter that accused him of being a "cheater". If need be, Genos was ready to incinerate the letter if its contents were of the unsavory kind.
For a few moments, the two of them remained silent and motionless. Genos sat by his mound of mail and stared up at his master, who stared at the letter wordlessly. A small bead of sweat ran down the cyborg's face, "uh…Sensei? Are you going to open it?"
Saitama's hardened expression then softened up to his usually goofy one as he placed his hand behind his hand like a skittish boy, "Well…" He admitted with a small, almost embarrassed smile. "I don't know if I can."
His mentor's reply instantly put the cyborg on edge as he jumped to his feet, "Why is that?! Do you believe the letter to be of ill intent?! I will dispose of it im-"
Saitama then held his hand defensively at his disciple, "Cool it, Genos," He did not like the blonde's hands were already burning hot, ready to fire and surely blast a huge gaping hole into his apartment. "It's not like that at all, " Saitama explained a smile reappearing on his face when Genos visibly calmed down and lowered his offenses. "This letter-" The self-proclaimed hero-for-fun then held up the letter to Genos' face and elaborated, "-is obviously from a girl," he finished calmly.
"Huh?" Genos blinked, almost is bewilderment, "A girl, you say?" The cyborg then examined the letter closely. It was encased in a lovely, feminine pink envelope with a lilac-colored floral design at the edges. The flap was sealed shut by bright-red, heart-shaped sticker. "I see…" He felt relief from knowing that but that relief was instantly followed by confusion. "But sensei, why would you not want to open a letter for such a reason? Do you prefer me-?"
Saitama stared at Genos blankly and interjected with a deadpanned tone," Don't even joke about that, dude." His expression then turned to normal as he explained, "This is my first and probably last letter from a fangirl. It feels like I should cherish it by never opening it." The bald hero then silently wondered if he should encase the letter in its own mini-shrine.
Genos sweat dropped," But sensei…I'm sure that if she is a fan now, she will continue to write you letters…"
Something visibly clicked inside of Saitama's head, "you're right! I'll read it then!"
Genos faithfully sat down in front of his mentor and bowed his head," please read it aloud, sensei!"
Saitama nodded as he peeled the sticker from the envelope's flap, flipped it open, and finally freed the letter from its encasement. "Here goes… Dear Chrome Dome-" Genos lifted his head and gasped as Saitama's eyes lit up angrily and his other free hand formed a fist, "WHAT KIND OF FANGIRL IS THIS?!"
"Sensei, you must calm down or you'll ruin your first fan letter!"
"You're right…" Saitama replied through gritted teeth as he glared down at the letter and continued to read in a hissing voice, "I mean, Saitama-sama…" his expression instantly returned to normal when it realized that the bald insult was a joke. "You probably don't remember me but it's me: Kagome." Both heroes froze at the mention of the sender's name.
After a few moments of silence, Genos finally asked his mentor, "aren't you going to read her letter, Sensei?"
The bald hero's face turned into a blank, almost incredulous expression, "She could have just told me in person."
Genos rubbed his chin thoughtfully and speculated aloud, "Perhaps she has something on her mind that she cannot say to you in person."
"This is Kagome we're talkin' about, right?" he asked before continuing, "She talks to me almost as much as you do. This is probably another prank of hers," he concluded dismissively, but while smiling fondly at the thought of her. The hero soon turned his attention back to the sheet of parchment in his hand. "You must be wondering why I'm writing to you," he read the next sentence. Ah. She hit the nail on the head without even being in the room. "Well, I've wanted to tell you something very important for a while now. We never seem to speak to each other properly for long and this is much easier for me than to face you in person… You see, it all started that day at the café…"
And this Saitama read the letter aloud and allowed its contents to take him and Genos on a trip to the recent past…
________________________________________
Kagome sighed as she leaned against a shining, wooden counter. Her eyes were glazed over as she stared out at of large, glass windows with boredom. It was 1:00PM on a Wednesday and most people were still in classes or at work. Meanwhile, here she was, working the mid-day shift at a small cafe in the middle of downtown City Z. She was like the other young women who ran the grunt work of the establishment. They were all college students who needed some employment for tuition and other essentials. The job paid well for being an entry-level one. Her shifts were also tailored around her class schedule.
The only two problems were how boring it could get during slow hours and…
The familiar bell jingles of a customer entering the premises caught her and the rest of her colleague's attentions. She and the other young women exchanged challengingly glance for a brief moment. All of them were bored of out their minds and looked ready to duke it out for the opportunity to have something to do.
However, Kagome was the quickest and beat the rest of the crew to the punch as she jumped over the counter to meet and greet their first customer in forty-four minutes. Kagome smiled brightly as she approached the door and coyly straightened her frilly, white apron. "Welcome, my Masters~" She giggled in voice so high and a manner so cutesy that the inner-Kagome inside of her head was bawling from embarrassment. "Table for-?"
That was when she opened her eyes and noted how the customer were actually a pair of customers. Odd ones. One was a blonde, rather handsome cyborg while the other was a man clad in a ridiculous, yellow body suit. "two…?" She finished, her cutesy tone broke into one of uncertainty as the older man gave her a deadpan stare.
"That's cringey," he stated bluntly before turning to his company. "Genos, why would you bring me here?!"
The cyborg replied earnestly, "My apologies, sensei. I assume that treating you to a maid café would be to your liking since you seem to enjoy mang-"
The yellow clad man then pointed directly at Kagome, to which she blinked as he shouted," Just because I like manga doesn't mean that I'm a pervert who likes things like this!" The young woman was dressed in traditionally black-and-white themed French maid uniform with the main dress being black and the white frilly hem of her petticoat reaching her mid-thighs. The black dress was complemented by shiny black dress shoes, white lacy stockings, and an intricately crafted headdress on top of the black crown of her head. Everything about the woman screamed moe and for Saitama, it was way over the top.
That struck a nerve in the young woman. It was her turn for her eyes to be set ablaze. She swatted his finger away, causing the two men to turn their attention fully to her. The indignant maid then stood within less than a centimeter away from the offending man. She glared up at his fiercely and was not daunted by their height difference. "Even if you're not into moe, you have no right to be so rude about it!" She lectured him.
"Say what now?" The manga fan asked blankly, wondering why this woman was seething at him.
Normally anyone who dared to challenge his sensei would be met by Genos' protectiveness as his loyal disciple, but this small woman was an exception. There was something unintimidating about a beautiful young woman in a maid outfit-. But it could have been anything from her youthful face to her feminine curves…or her lack of height.
Kagome visibly looked the man up and down. He was clad a tight, bright yellow body suit complete with red boots, gloves, a cape, and even some sort of special belt with a buckle. "Hmph," She huffed while continuing to glare, "You claim to not be a pervert but you walk around in public wearing that getup?" She asked pointedly. "I may be a cringey maid but at least I still have decency," she crossed her arms over chest and added, "baldy."
A vein appeared on the man's forehead and Kagome smiled cattishly, satisfied that she struck a nerve. Then suddenly, it felt like time had stood completely still for her when she noticed how the man's perfectly bald head reflected the afternoon sunlight like a mirror. 'That head… It feels like I've seen it somewhere before' she thought to herself. But before any more words could be exchanged, the ground began to shake and her colleagues began to scream in terror.
Kagome too squeaked when she lost her footing and fell to her butt unceremoniously. "What's going on here?!" She shouted over the booming and screaming of her colleagues as they ran out of the lobby and back towards the employee lounge.
"Sensei," The blonde cyborg stated in a grave tone. "I detect a high-level energy just outside this establishment."
The "sensei" nodded as he looked at his comrade while re-adjusting and tightening his red gloves, "Right. Let's take it out then find some real food."
Kagome glowered at the man from her spot on the floor, "Are you implying that our food isn't real?!" The young woman briefly forgot that something possibly dangerous was about to occur. She could not stand this man who was casually insulting her and her workplace. Sure, it was an embarrassing job but she came to love it because of the friendships that she formed with her fellow maids, her manager, and even the regular customers.
"Oh, you're still?" The yellow-clad baldly asked curiously as he turned to look at her fallen form. "It'll probably get dangerous so you should find somewhere to hide and be safe, "he told her calmly.
Kagome blinked, taken aback by the man's sudden change in tone and attitude. She stared speechlessly as the two men exited through the front of the building to face to incoming danger head on. "What's with those two…?" She wondered aloud to no one in particular.
(Outside)
Saitama and Genos stared blankly at the creature who appeared before them several meters away from the maid café. "You've…got to be kidding me," Saitama said blankly.
"It would seem that there are all sorts of monsters in this world, sensei."
It was fuzzy, gray, and the size of a kitten.
Actually, it was a kitten.
The monster flew from the sky and landed gracefully in front of them on all-fours was a small, gray, and green-eyed kitten. "It's a cat," Saitama said in half bored, half disappointed tone as they watched it lick one of its paw then seemingly groom the hair on top of its head.
"This cat is the source of the high level of energy though, "Genos pointed out, his face remaining serious and cold as he stared the creature down and awaited its attack.
That was when the kitten stopped grooming itself and looked directly at them, "that is correct." It said in a ridiculously high-pitched, cute voice. "I am no ordinary kitten!" It announced as it stood on its hind legs. "I am-!"
The creature's self-introduction was interrupted by a girlish coo and a cry of, "so adorable~!"
"What?!" Genos asked as he and Saitama turned around to see the spit-fire maid from earlier standing a couple of meters away from them, her eyes visibly sparkling and her cheeks flushed in admiration for the cute creature. "She did not evacuate like you suggested, sensei!"
"Ehhh…" Saitama said boredly while picking his nose and looking back at the "threat".
"Ahem…" the kitten cleared its throat and continued to announce its presence, "as I was saying, I am Bad Kitty! A monster born from the regrets of a manga-loving, socially reclusive geek who never lost his virginity!"
The brilliance in Kagome's eyes dulled as she asked sharply and looked at Saitama, "So you birthed this cat?"
"Hey, don't lump me in the same category as hat thing!" Was his protest as he turned his full attention back to the young woman who stared at his pointedly, as if the entire situation was his fault. The bickering trio was unaware of how the now-angry cat creature was slowly growing in size behind them until it overshadowed them completely. The three of them turned around and looked up at the creature that was easily the size of skyscraper. Its cutesy façade seemed to have melted away as its muzzle extended and jutted out large canines and fangs. Its tiny paws were now adorned by claws the length of a street sign and as thick as a car.
"STOP INTERRUPTING!" The creature roared furiously, "I AM BAD KITTY! AND I AM HERE TO (BEEP) GORGEOUS MAAAAAAAADS!"
"Oh," Saitama said casually as he turned to smile at Kagome. "That's not so bad. Is he your type?"
Kagome growled and shook her fist at the hero, "as if, PERVERT!"
"YOU DARE IGNORE ME?!" Bad Kitty raged as he quickly swatted at them, his paw moving much quicker than what one would guess from his massive size. Genos and Saitama easily scattered and dodged the attack with the maid in the latter's arms.
Saitama simply landed on top of a car with the maid in his arms, not caring too much that he muddied the sheen of its obvious recent wax job. "Here," he stated while easily setting the young woman down on her feet with one hand. She stared up at him with a dumbstruck expression and her lips ajar in awe. "You…saved me…" She pointed out.
"Of course, it's my job. He replied calmly. "I'm a hero for fun after all."
Kagome gasped softly and her eyes widened as the reason for this man's odd state of dress dawned upon, "I see… Well, thank you." She said in a small smile. Saitama blinked as he stared at her for a moment, wondering if her change in demeanor was because she found out that he was a hero.
"Hey, Genos!" The bald hero called over to his disciple. "You mind taking care of this one for me?" He asked before gesturing to the maid still standing by his side, despite the imminent danger surrounding her. "This one needs babysitting."
The blonde merely nodded and made a mad dash at the monstrous creature. Genos could tell by the look on Saitama's face that the man was not excited about this monster's presence and did not want to bother wasting time on it. Even though he was using the young woman as an excuse, this disciple saw right through his sensei's façade. Genos nodded to himself, finally, it was time to show his sensei and the world what he was made of!
"Stand back, meido-san!" The cyborg shouted as he jumped in front of the cat creature to face it head on. He began to charge a massive amount of fire power," I will incinerate this-!"
Before the enthused young man could complete his sentence, the giant cat creature flicked him away like an insect and bellowed at the sight of his metallic body crashing into the maid café not too far away. "You talk too much!"
While Saitama did not look fazed or concerned for his comrade, the young maid openly did, "Oh no! He's been hurt!" she cried out as she run from his side and towards the direction of Genos' crash landing.
"Oh boy…" Saitama mumbled when he saw the cat creature's sight turn to the maid who was running adjacent to him. "This one really does need babysitting." The yellow-suited hero then picked at and groomed his ear with a pinky.
"Ahaha…" The creature bellowed as he bent down to peer inside of the huge gaping hole in the maid café. "You should be more concerned about yourself, girly…" The creature taunted as he spotted the petite woman kneeled beside a pile of rubble that buried Genos alive.
Despite her fears, Kagome ignored the cackling monster as she threw brick up on brick aside until she unearthed the cyborg. "Hey, are you okay?" She asked with horror etched as clear as day across her face when she discovered the cyborg to be still alive but cracked and broken here and there.
His eyes flickered but he opened them nonetheless, "You shouldn't be here…" He told as he attempted to sit up and regain his composure. "It's too dangerous for a civilian."
Kagome frowned as she wrapped his arm around her shoulder and told him with determination in her voice, "civilian or not, I'm here to rescue you!"
The blonde shook his head,"I am an S-rank class hero. It is my duty to protec-"
Kagome glared at him, "Listen, buddy. It doesn't matter who registered as a hero or not in situations like this. People are supposed to help other!"
Getting his head bitten off by the young woman seemed to have quieted down but the peace did not last long. As soon as she turned them around to escape, she came face-to-face with a gigantic claw. "Down!" She called as she pushed Genos to the floor and dove on top of him protectively. The blonde's eyes widened as his face was stuffed full of her ample, soft breasts. Too afraid to move from her current position and not knowing what to do next, Kagome laid there on top of her charge. This would have been the perfect time for them to be rescued by that yellow hero guy. "Jeez, where is that Sensei Baldy when you need-?!"
Before she could complete her sentence, a loud sonic boom was heard from outside, followed by the sound of shower of squishy organs and blood raining down from the sky. "I'm guessing…we're saved…?" Kagome asked Genos but she paid him no mind since her attention was focused on the lanky figure who casually waltzed through the hole in the maid café. Kagome glared at him," you're slow."
Saitama blinked when he saw the compromising position that Genos and Kagome were in. The maid was completely straddling the cyborg with her huge breasts smothering his face. "And you're fast," the bald hero replied nonchalantly.
"What…?" Kagome blinked and cocked her head to the side for a moment, unsure of what he meant by that until she looked down and realized what she was doing… She shrieked as her face instantly turned bright red and she jumped to her feet, "I-It's not like that, you shameless pervert!" She exclaimed while waving her hands around frantically, "I was protecting him!"
"Right…" Saitama replied before looking down at the cyborg who laid down scarily still and stiff on the floor, "Genos, buddy, you still alive? Did her boobs suffocate you?"
"You really are a pervert!"
He ignored the young woman's accusation as he peered over and down at Genos' face. He was indeed alive and breathing. However, something was clearly off about him as his eyes were wider than usual and his mouth was ajar. An unusual expression of shock seemed permanently plastered on his face. "Did you blow a gasket or something?" Saitama asked curiously.
The cyborg suddenly blinked and was brought back to reality. He sat up and stated seriously, "Once again, my life has been saved by you, Saitama-sensei." He then turned his gaze upon the maid who was staring at him as worriedly as his sensei was. "And to you, meido-san, who risked her life to-"
Kagome sighed and cut in, "Sorry to interrupt but my name is Kagome, not meido-san. Use that."
Genos looked a bit taken aback and then nodded as he finished," Kagome-san, you risked your life to protect my own. Thank you."
Saitama then scratched his cheek, "That's nice and all but can we go now? I'm starving."
To Kagome's surprise, the cracked and broken cyborg got to his feet and dusted off his pants. "Yes, sensei," he replied dutifully, like a loyal dog. She guessed that he really did not need her help after all. She gasped sharply when the duo turned to leave.
"HOLD IT!" She screamed as she desperately grabbed onto Saitama's cape to hold him back.
The hero blinked as they turned and looked at her. "What now?" He asked. Of course. she was not strong enough to really hold him against his will but he was just the type of guy who rolled with it.
Kagome hardened her expression and prayed that her face did not betray how she felt inside and portray her thoughts. "You can't leave yet!" She told him. "You need to help me repair the damages caused here!" She explained in a shaky, desperate tone.
"Uhhh… Put it on my tab?" Saitama asked.
"We don't do that here!"
"Okay, goodbye!" He replied quickly as he turned away again, only to find that the woman tightened her grip on his cape.
"You're not going anywhere!" Kagome huffed and gave his cape a yank, though it did not budge him in the slightest.
The pang of hunger in his stomach meant that enough was enough.
"Cut it out, we're busy!"
"Please, Kagome-san," Genos began, trying to play mediator between the two. Never before had he seen anyone get under his sensei's skin so much in one sitting. This woman seemed more interactive with him than any other civilian. "My sensei is a very busy man-"
"There's something that I need to talk to you about though!" Kagome insisted while giving the cape another tug.
"Okay," within the blink of an eye Saitama turned around and had his hands on the hem of Kagome's apron. "Let's see how you like it." The superhuman hero gave the frail piece of cloth a tug. His state of annoyance seemed to have made him forget to hold back more because what he thought was a small tug had enough force to rip and tear off every piece of clothing that the young woman had one that day. "Oops," his face returned to normal as the air grew quiet.
The young woman was left standing as in nothing but her black shoes and white maid headband. Her breath hitched in her throat as her brain struggled to keep up with the sensation that her body felt and the blurs that her eyes missed. It took four whole seconds her to register what had just happened…
Kagome screamed and curled into a protective ball to save her decency, though it was far too late for her to save face with the two men who had seen her everything. "Y-You bastards! STOP LOOKING!" She seethed when she noticed that neither men tore their eyes away from her form.
It was only then that Genos' faces flushed as he was brought back to reality and he covered his eyes, "I-I'm sorry, Kagome-san!"
"Yeah, "Saitama added in a tone that did not sound sorry at all. It was a tone so casual that it felt uncaring. "My bad," he added.
"Your BAD?!" Kagome seethed as she scooched herself into a corner when she spotted a crowd of nosy people beginning to form outside. "How am I supposed to go home like THIS?!" Her face was incredibly flushed as opposed to her lightly tanned skin. Her cheeks were puffed full of hot air as she pouted and glared at the man who seemed to infuriate her so.
"Uhhh..." Saitama looked up at the ceiling for a moment before, "Good question," he commented.
"Sensei," Genos began while making sure to avoid both Saitama's and Kagome's eyes, "We must do something. It would be very problematic if a young woman were to travel around in such a state."
For a moment, the young woman squeezed her eyes shut and covered her ears, as if being unable to see and hear the two men would shut out the reality of the situation. It was an embarrassingly and unbelievable reality that she thought only happened in the ecchi anime that she sometimes found herself watching. 'This isn't happening. This isn't happening. This isn- Huh?' Her inner mantra was cut short by the sound of unbuckling, cloth flapping, and then the feeling of being covered in something soft.
Her blue eyes shot open and she was surprised to find that she could not see the background of the café. It was nothing but a white cloth surrounding her. It was like being in bed, sitting beneath her cozy blankets. Kagome then shook her head and nuzzled her way out of the white depths. It was then that she found herself staring up at a cape-less Saitama.
"You can borrow this," he concluded with a small smile and a surprisingly gentle pat to her head.
Despite the hero's smile, Kagome frowned in return but accepted the offering. She hugged it tightly around her form like a curtain to hide her naked body from the world. She was so embarrassed that she felt like she was going to die right then and there. The young woman glared at the bald man whose face showed no remorse for shredding her uniform and leaving her in the nude in public. She pulled the cape closer and allowed the lower part of her face to sink into its depths.
________________________________________
"kind of nice" Saitama read the line casually, despite how intimate it was. "I didn't realize it back then but the scent of your cape made me feel so relaxed. It was a manly mixture of sweat, musk, battle, and you."
Genos perked up at the description that she wrote of his sensei's cape. 'Manly scent… It is pheromones that attracts Kagome to sensei so…' he opened his notebook and began taking notes. He inwardly concluded that he would need to work hard to become as worthy of a man as his sensei was!
"I know that it sounds weird but…" Saitama paused in his reading to criticize the writer. "If she knows that it sounds weird, then why write it?"
Genos then placed his pen down onto the table and looked at his sensei, "It is because Kagome wants to share everything with you."
Part of the reason why I was so angry is because everything you did that made me feel so flustered.
From insulting my job to saving my life to ripping my clothes parts…I wasn't expecting any of it.
You took me by surprise in a few minutes more than anyone else has in a long time.
Honestly, I didn't know what to say, how to feel, or how to react, especially when...
...you didn't seem to recognize me at all.
________________________________________
"Eh?" Kagome blinked as another blush spread across her cheeks, "You're taking me home too?!" She could not believe this guy! He had crossed so many lines with her today and now he thought that she would let him walk her home?!
"I mean, even I would feel bad if I made a naked girl walk home alone," the bald hero explained with a small wave of his hand to emphasize his words.
Genos nodded in agreement, finally ready to face the pair after he recollected his composure, "Kagome-san, Saitama-sensei is a great hero and could not live with himself if he did not see you home safely," he assured her with a balled up, iron fist that showed his vigor for praising his mentor.
Kagome sweat dropped then gave Saitama a sideways glance of suspicion, "Is that true?"
The interrogated then laughed awkwardly while scratching the back of his head, "Actually, I wanted to make sure that you give my cape back~" he admitted shamelessly.
{SLAP!}
Kagome stomped out of the café while clutching the cape close to her body and nearly breathing fire like a raging dragon. Her eye twitched with agitation at the thought of Genos getting her hopes up before getting let down by Saitama.
The blonde cyborg outstretched his hand towards the young woman and called out, "Kagome-san!"
She then growled and glared over her shoulder at the duo, "I'LL WALK MYSELF HOME, YOU JERKS!"
For some reason, Genos found himself almost flinching at the insult directed at him. "I am…a jerk…?" He wondered beneath his breath. "Sensei, do you think that I-?" The cyborg blink before he noticed that this mentor was already down the block, walking not too far behind the seething young woman. "Ah, so sensei insists on seeing her home safely," he concluded. Before he had the chance to even consider joining them, an idea popped into his head and he quickly spun on his heels.
There on the tile floor laid Kagome's maid uniform that was ripped into several pieces. The cyborg stooped over and collected each piece one by one, examining each of them closely before picking up the other. "They are salvageable," he told himself.
________________________________________
The two of them walked in silence with the woman walking a meter in front of the man. She kept her head down to avoid showing her face to the passersby who openly gawked and whispered to each other about how odd the two of them looked. One was a young woman wrapped in a white covering scattered, displaced maid costume accessories; the other was a man in yellow body suit and random heroic accessories. 'When is he going to stop following me?' Kagome thought begrudgingly, pouting internally and externally as she fought that urge to turn around and confront him head on. 'Shouldn't a hero have better things to do?!'
Little did she know, the laidback hero who trailed behind her with his arms folded coolly behind his head was only thinking of what he should have for dinner tonight. He had no clue how far the woman lived from her work place but he hoped that it was not too much further.
Oh.
That gave him an idea.
Kagome shrieked when she suddenly felt her feet lift off the ground, followed by the rest of her body. "H-Hey!" She cried as in one, swift movement, she was bounced from Saitama's hip to on top of his back. Despite her protest, she instinctively rested her hands on his shoulders. "What do you think you're doing now, Mister?!"
Without turning to meet her gaze, which was most likely intense from the anger that she seemed to frequently suffer from, he replied while cupping his hands beneath her bottom. "Getting you home will be faster this way."
"Hmph," Kagome huffed and looked away from him, even though he was not even looking at her. "You just want an excuse to touch me~" she half joked and half excused.
"Even if that were true, it's not like you're protesting that much," he pointed out nonchalantly before changing the subject, "So…where to?"
Kagome found herself feeling dazed and dizzy from the ride home. It literally went by in a blur and what usually was a forty-five-minute walk (one that she took to and from work to save money on transportation expenses) turned into a two-minute run. She shakily climbed off Saitama's back to unlock the door to her quaint campus apartment. She kept the key in her shoe at work.
"Well…this is it…" She informed him while staring up at the man with a small blush on her cheeks.
"But…this is a college apartment, isn't it?" He asked while following her inside without bothering asking for permission. He at least had the decency to remove his boots and left them by hers at the doorway.
Kagome then stopped just short of entering her bedroom and asked back, "yeah, so what?"
"…aren't you a high school girl?"
"I'M TWENTY-ONE, YOU IDIOT!" She roared indignantly.
"Oh." Was his curt reply, he was already used to her dangerously short temper. "What a baby-face."
Kagome's expression then lit up before she batted her eyelashes cutely, "Glad you think so, Master~"
This instantly caused Saitama's own face to go sour, "So cringe-worthy…"
The maid huffed as she dropped her cutesy persona, "Jeez, you're so hard to please. Glad you're not a regular."
Saitama then smiled and commented," I don't see how anyone could be turned on by that kind of act-" Kagome's cheeks instantly puffed with hot air. "You're actually a lot cuter when you're angry than when you act like that," he admitted with a friendly smile that caught Kagome off guard.
Despite inwardly feeling happy that someone preferred a more realistic side of her to the act that she and her colleagues had to put on for the sake of the café's theme, Kagome attempted to glare at Saitama and asked, "Is that supposed to make me happy?"
"Ah? It doesn't?" The hero asked in confused tone as he blinked at her.
"No! What makes you think that?!" She huffed before retreating into her bedroom to get changed.
'What a weird girl…' He thought to himself as he stood awkwardly in her small living/dining room. 'She smiled at me for the first time today, but claimed not to be happy.' The hero soon found himself rather bored while waiting for the woman to change out of his cape and into normal clothing. Her apartment really left nothing to look at. It was even blander than his, despite being a bit bigger.
There were no photographs of family or friends hanging on the walls. There was no television for entertainment. There were not even any books, besides some a slightly disheveled stack of college textbooks sitting on top of her kotatsu. All in all, the lack of personalization to the space made it give off an almost melancholic vibe.
"Sorry for the wait," Kagome said as she emerged from her room wearing a simple heather-gray T-Shirt and a pair of faded blue jeans. "It took a while to find these," she said as she walked up to the hero with his cape folded neatly within her arms.
"You took a long time…just to find that?" He asked while arching an eyebrow and staring down at her as she stood up on her tippy-toes to re-buckle his cape to his shoulders. From the few seconds that her body was pressed against his, he could smell a light scent of some sort of flower.
He expected her to snap at him again but instead she laughed lightly and explained before backing away from him with an almost coy smile on her face, "Well, yeah…" she began while placing her hands behind her back and cupping them. Saitama noted how the woman's natural self really was much cuter than her maid façade. "I'm going back to work to see if I can clean it up a bit," she explained. "No one wants to do such dirty work in their nice clothes." 'Should I…ask him…?' she wondered inwardly, not noticing that the man bade her goodbye with a simple "See ya" and wave over his shoulder. It took a moment but she finally gathered up her courage and nodded to herself, 'I'll do it!'
Kagome then turned around to face the hero, "Would you like to-…?" Seeing that she was alone in the apartment with her door left wide open. "…that guy…" She sighed.
You suddenly took off without me noticing.
I didn't get the chance to tell you what I wanted to back at the café.
________________________________________
Even though work had been scheduled for the day after the disaster, Kagome was informed that she did not have to go in since owner was still arranging how to go about rebuilding and repairing the damage done. Still, she found herself showing up at her workplace with a broom, dust pan, and a box of heavy duty trash bags. It was not that she enjoyed cleaning for free but she honestly had nothing else better to do, besides study. And with the events of yesterday pressing so hard on her mind, studying was not an option. She needed something to keep her mind numb and her hands busy.
So there she was, sweeping up dusty and rubble in the warmth of another quiet afternoon all alone. Her colleagues who fled the scene as soon as danger seemed to approach had no clue what transpired or what even attacked them. They felt no obligation to show up and help clean. Last night she received an onslaught of phone calls and texts from worried coworkers, asking if she had escaped the café in one piece since she did not flee with them. Even though she was working for free and working alone, Kagome still found herself grateful that her fellow maids did leave as soon as the going got rough. 'The last thing that I need is for one of them to have been saved by Saitama too…' she thought absent-mindedly.
The young woman was snapped from her thoughts at the sound of someone's foot stepping on and cracking some of the shattered glass on the ground. She turned around with her broom in hand and was actually quite surprised to find that it was none other than the blonde cyborg from the day before. "Oh, it's you, " she surmised, "What's up? Did you forget something?" She inquired as he approached her quietly with an almost intimidating, stony look on his face.
"No, I did not," he responded before stopping right in front of her. "But you did," he added while presenting her with a small, cardboard box. Kagome looked unsure for a moment but reluctantly accepted the box from it. He nodded to her to open it and she nodded back before slowly lifting the lid.
"Oh… Is this…?" She whispered as she stared down at what appeared to be her maid uniform for work. She sat the box down on the floor before raising the uniform up to look at it in its entirety. "My uniform?" She asked while looking at the cyborg, utterly confused about how he could have gotten her a new uniform when they had to be custom-made by their company's supplier.
"I took the liberties of repairing it for you as thanks for protecting me, "Genos told her as he watched her examine and awe at his handiwork. "I hope it is to your liking, Kagome-san!" He exclaimed while giving her a deep but formal bow at his waist with his arms stiffly at his sides.
To his surprise, the young woman laughed blissfully and nearly tackled him as she threw her arms around his neck in an appreciative embrace. "Thanks a bunch, Genos!" She chirped before pulling away to smile up at him sweetly.
The cyborg ignored the odd feeling that he felt in his chest when he saw her smiling face. Somehow, it felt like she was glowing when she looked at him so fondly. "It is the least that I could do…" he insisted before tearing his gaze away from her. It felt as if he continued to look at her, he would find himself caught in a sort of hypnotic trace.
"No really~" She added as her smile got wider and her eyes began to sparkle, "I was so angry yesterday because the company charges us for replacement uniforms!" She finally looked away from the cyborg to admire her newly repaired maid costume, "but this looks as good as new! I'm so impressed that you're so skilled at sewing!"
Genos then nodded as he looked around the café and assessed the damage that was done to the place, "Do you need assistance in cleaning? I see that you are working alone."
Kagome smiled and shook her head from side to side, "Nah, don't worry about it~ I only came here because I needed something to do." She placed her broom against a table and clapped her hands together, "but now that you're here, I'm not completely alone! Wanna do something?" She asked hopefully while staring up at Genos with wavering, puppy-like eyes.
Genos rubbed his chin for a moment and looked thoughtful, "Well…I do need go grocery shopping for sensei and I. We are lowing short on-"
Kagome gasped and jumped closer to him, almost nose-to-nose as she stared into his eyes with fists balled up near her chest, "You mean that you two live together?!" she asked in an overly shocked manner.
The thoughtful expression on Genos' face changed back to his usual stoic one, "We do. It is more convenient for me to learn under sensei that way."
Kagome's face then changed to a slightly pouty one as she sighed, "How nice…~" She gave a small, wistful smile before adding, "I'm a bit jealous~" before laughing at herself to disperse what could have turned into a depressing atmosphere.
Being as straightforward as he was, the cyborg did not hesitate to ask out of sheer curiosity, "Are you jealous that I am living with Saitama-sensei?" The blonde's amber eyes readily connected to woman's blue eyes as he searched for an answer within the windows of her soul.
However, as soon as their eyes met, Kagome's retreated to the side as her cheeks flushed, "Don't be ridiculous!" She said defensively, "It's just that I don't have a roommate living with me anymore!" She explained as she looked at the ground. "Sometimes, it gets a little lonely, that's all!" She added with giving him a half-hearted glare. Honestly, it was much easier to glare at Saitama than Genos. The cyborg felt more genuine and curious, like a puppy discovering the world for the first time.
"I see," the cyborg replied while looking thoughtful once more. "Shall I ask if you can move in wit-?"
"No-THANK YOU!" Kagome interjected while placing a hand up. "Let's just get out of here, okay?" She changed the subject immediately. The last thing she needed weighing on her mind was the thought of living with the two extremely attractive heroes.
Genos nodded, willing to follow her lead just as quickly as he would his mentors, "Sure, let's. But let us depart for our apartment first, I need to do inventory of our current food stock."
Kagome nodded and laughed lightly as she latched onto his arm in a chummy manner, unintentionally brushing her breasts against his exposed synthetic skin. She felt him stiffened a bit and waved her hand dismissively, "Come on now, Genos~ You don't have to be formal with me~" she told him sweetly, "I just call you Genos without an honorific after all so just relax~ We're friends, aren't we?"
Their walk back to Saitama's and Genos' apartment was a pleasant and most comfortable one. The duo found themselves feeling more natural around each other than expected. For the first time in a long time, Kagome felt like she had a friend who she could laugh freely with. And for the first time in a long time, Genos felt like he was an ordinary human being. Their conversation most consisted of Kagome asking her new friend a question and him replying with a long, convoluted answer. The cyborg had quite the motor mouth, especially about Saitama, whom he adored and his past. But Kagome did not mind the chatter one bit; it was nice to have someone to talk with outside of work after all.
The young woman found then began to notice that the two of them were leaving the "safe" side of the city and venturing deeper and deeper in a sector that she and no one who she knew before yesterday dared to go… It was a borderline slum with trash about, dark alleys, and many uninhabited homes. "Ehh…" Kagome laughed nervously, "Genos…do you two really live here?" She asked unsurely, being in this area of the city made her feel a bit uneasy, despite being with a hero. Her senses were tugging at her, telling her that something sinister was lurking about somewhere not far.
Genos merely nodded and continued his long story about how he came to live with Saitama as he led her up the black, iron stairway to the front door. Kagome noted how he opened the door without unlocking it with a key and called as they stepped in, "Sensei, I brought a guest over!"
Kagome felt a bit nervous being in the bald hero's home but curiously peeked from behind Genos' taller form nonetheless, "Hello, hello~ Look who's here~" she added in but tilted her head to the side when no one seemed to answer. "Aww, no one's home," she concluded as she followed Genos further into the more than humble abode.
"It would seem that sensei had some errands of his own to take care of," Genos pointed out as he placed the box that held Kagome's uniform on the floor next to a moderately-sized bookcase that was filled to the brim with manga. "Would you mind waiting here while I check the kitchen?" He asked politely as he walked towards the kitchen area.
Kagome shook her head and smiled, "Go ahead, I'll be fine~" she told him as she eyed the bookcase curiously. 'I wonder what type of manga he likes…' The blue-eyed woman then reached out and plucked a random one from the shelf. It appeared to be the average shounen genre manga. While she did enjoy reading those and watching their anime counterparts, Kagome was not here at the bookcase for her own entertainment. No… She was a woman a mission to find out-
"What's this guy's kink?" She whispered to herself as she scanned the spines of each manga individually, searching for something that she could use. "Every manga geek has one…" she told herself. Hell. Even she had a fetish for kuudere-type characters and bishies. They were just so lovable!
Sorry. In hindsight, maybe it was wrong of me to look through your manga collection without permission.
Then again, you had it out in the open so it wasn't supposed to be private, right? Oh well. Too late now.
I didn't realize it at the time but I was so curious about you for a reason.
________________________________________
The trip the supermarket turned out to be just as pleasant as their walk from the café to the apartment, if not even better. Genos explained to Kagome how much Saitama loved sales and saving money since he did not have much and she wholeheartedly agreed with him. She was no low-ranking hero, but she was the average university student: broken. "I am surprised that Sensei is not here himself. He usually the first one at the door when a sale is taking pace, "Genos pointed out while filling a plastic bag full of discounted leeks.
Kagome nodded and smiled fondly as her eyes glanced over the prices of fruit that were adjacent to the vegetable section that Genos was taking care. The duo was nearly back-to-back as one grabbed vegetables and the other grabbed fruit and placed them into their shared shopping cart. "Hey, Genos…" she suddenly called. The cyborg turned around and saw the woman comically standing in front of the citrus section with a small tangerine in one hand and a luscious grapefruit in the other. She held the two fruit in front of her chest, as if comparing them to her breasts and asked with a determined look on her face, "What size does Saitama prefer?!"
Genos sweat dropped, "I am unsure of how to answer that question…"
To make matters even worse for the poor guy, Kagome then placed down the tangerine and picked up a cantaloupe, "Or could it be that he's the melon type?!"
Time seemed to fly by much quicker with Genos' new friend than when he shopped or cooked alone. He was more than impressed about how having one extra person along for a task could change the entire atmosphere. Shopping that used to feel like a necessity if not a complete chore turned out…dare, he thought it…fun? Kagome was an oddball of the special variety. She had times where she was sweet and innocent, accidentally making his heart race with a small action like bumping into him while walking. There were other times where she was more impish but still in a cute way. All in all, the cyborg found him enjoying the time that they spent together.
After hours of errands and cores, it was around 7PM at night and their dinner was just about ready for serving. Kagome's eyes sparkled at the sight of the hotpot simmering with slices of beef, eggs, and veggies. She wafted the heavenly aroma to her noise and made a humming sound of contentment,"Mmm, sukiyaki in late summer~ I feel so spoiled~!" She commented since sukiyaki was typically a winter dish. But the two agreed that their haul from the sale called for a dish that would do all of their procured treasures justice all at once.
Genos nodded and added, "I'm sure that Sensei would appreciate a hearty meal like this as well. He should be home any minute now."
Kagome smiled as an idea popped into her head, "that reminds me of one last thing that I want to do today! Come on, I need your help!" She urged the cyborg while taking his hand and all but dragging him out of the kitchen and into the living room.
Genos looked down at Kagome with his usual expression and began to ask, "What is it that you need to-?"
"Turn around for a minute," Kagome commanded but in a tone that did not come off as "bossy". The cyborg complied, despite being confused about how she could need his help while he did nothing but stand there and face the opposite direction. Genos, being a calculating as he was, set a sixty-second timer and waited patiently while staring at the wall as he watched the numbers inside of his head countdown to zero.
Once the timer stopped, Genos turned around to look at his friend, "What is that you nee-?!" only to find that his eyes met the sight of Kagome's panties-covered rear-end. She was in nothing but her matching light-blue bra and panties and bent over to step into her maid uniform.
Kagome's face immediately turned red as she yelled, "Wait, I'm not ready yet!"
And as cruel fate would have it, the front door opened and in stepped Saitama in all of his yellow-suited, bald-headed glory. "Genos, I'm bac- …Ah." His expression, of course, was that pokerface that Kagome learned to be his mood-neutral one. His wide but blank eyes stared at the scene before him as Kagome and Genos stood frozen in place in an awkward silence. Kagome was still bent over, in nothing but her underwear while Genos stood dangerously close behind.
From Saitama's perspective, he just walked in on something that was…
"I-it's…" Kagome was the first to speak but her breath was caught in her throat. "-n-not…"
Finally Genos recovered from the shock that seemed to override his systems and took over for her, "What she means to say is, it is not what it looks like Sensei," he informed his mentor calmly, "We are in this situation because Kagome was in dire need of my assistanc-"
"Gross. That's enough, dude."
"W-What?! It's really not what it looks liiiiiiiiiiikeeeee!"
________________________________________
What Kagome had hoped to be a peaceful, comfortable dinner for three turned out to be the exact opposite: it was so awkward, for her at least. While Genos did not seem bothered by what had just transpired, she was still quite flustered. It did not help that the bald man sitting directly across from her had been staring at her non-stop with that blank expression on his face during the entire meal. Even when he was shoveling food into his mouth, he was staring at her relentlessly with those big eyes of his. Even when she tested to see if he was staring at something behind her by scooting to the left and right, those eyes followed her where ever she went. It was so unnerving! She wished that if he had something to say that he would just come out and-
"Oh." Finally, he spoke, a small smile replaced that unnerving blank stare. "You're that maid from yesterday: Kahuna!" He stated triumphantly, as if he just made an exciting discovery!
Kagome slammed her head against the table before glaring at the man sitting across from her, "It's KAGOME, you idiot!"
"Ohhhh, riiiiight," he replied while scratching the back of his head sheepishly. "I knew that I've seen you from somewhere before but I couldn't put my finger on it." With that mystery finally solved, Saitama continued popping slices of savory beef into his mouth.
"You can't be serious…?" Kagome glared at him with a deadpanned tone.
"Do not worry, Kagome," Genos spoke up suddenly. "My Sensei here is a good man. He is just so preoccupied with his daily quotas that his memory fails him sometimes."
"Well, to be honest," Saitama added as he eyed another slice of beef in the pots of goodies. Kagome huffed as she watched his chopsticks reach out to pluck the meat from the brew. The annoyed young woman reached over to the hotpot with her own chopsticks to thwart Saitama's plot of dominating all of the beef strips! "You look like a chick that I banged in a dream once," he said casually. Kagome's chopsticks stopped just short of the beef as she froze. "Oh, cool," he smiled while grabbing the forfeited piece of flesh. "More for me~"
Genos noted Kagome's bright red face and incredulous expression and decided to step up for her, "Sensei, please. It is inappropriate to tease her like that at the dinner table."
Kagome shook her head and crossed her arms, "Thanks but that's not it, Genos."
"Oh? Then you are not upset about Sensei ruining the mood with his perverted humor?"
The answer to the question even piqued Saitama's interested as he stopped picking over the vegetables to stare at Kagome as she played with a lock of her hair, feeling a little embarrassed under the scrutiny of the two men. "No, "She quickly with a small pout at her lips. "I'm upset that he thinks that it was a dream, "she admitted, her eyes settling on the shining table surface as heat rushed to her cheeks at the sound of the two men choking on and spitting out their meal.
The confession even had Genos acting out of character, his pale cheeks now flushed bright red, his blonde hair standing on end, and his eyes widened, "S-S-Sensei, is this the truth?!"
"Uhhhhh…" Saitama scratched his cheek while looking up and away, avoiding Genos' and Kagome's eyes as she did to them. "I guess…it's possible," he concluded with a smile, despite his shock and even hidden embarrassment.
Kagome finally got the courage to look up from the table and at Saitama's face, she was grateful that he was not looking at her back this time. "We met before yesterday…" She said nervously, her voice wavering with embarrassment. Yes, she usually avoided embarrassing situations but this case was different and special to her. She needed to do this. "It was a bit over a year ago…" The two men fell silent as they listened to her story. "I was at a beach party with my friends. Of course, we're in college so a lot of people got drunk. Some jerk hit on me and got rejected so he took my key-ring and threw it into the ocean…"
________________________________________
['Dammit! Why is this happening to me?!' Kagome thought to herself miserably and angrily as she sloshed around in the frigid, dark waters, searching fruitlessly for her lost apartment key. Her so-called "friends" had long gone home or to a guy's house, leaving her on the beach alone well past 3AM. Despite being cold and wrinkly, Kagome's hands continued to search through salty water, sand, slimy weeds, and rock to find that familiar feel of jagged metal. Every minute or so, she would break the surface again to rest her arms and gasp for air. After what felt like hours of scrambling, she decided to call it quits. Her body was not going to tolerate the elements for much longer.
Despite giving up on her futile attempts to find her key, Kagome did not return to her apartment yet. It was not like she could get in anyway. Instead, she opted to sit on the dock and watched the big, white moon command the dark waves to taunt her about her powerlessness. Suddenly, she knew what would make her feel even just a little bit better. The young woman got to her feet, balled up her fist, and screamed as loudly as she could into the silent night. She screamed and screamed out her frustrations and anger about the cruel hand that fate dealt her today.
"Uh… Are you okay?" Came an unfamiliar, masculine voice from behind her.
Kagome screamed again, but this time in fear and not anger, and jumped as she turned quickly to face the stranger, "W-Who are you?!" She asked nervously while looking the man up and down. He had a perfectly bald head that reflected the moonlight, an odd yellow body suit, and a cape. "A cosplayer?" she asked hopefully, silently praying that he was a nerd and not some random pervert.
"Actually, I'm a hero for fun," He replied with a smile, "What are you doing out here so late? And why are you soaked?" he asked, a hint of concern was hidden within that curious tone.
Kagome shook her head and shifted on her feet in an embarrassed manner, "I uh…lost my key in the sea.." she stated skittishly. It was far too personal to tell a stranger about how she was sexually harassed and that's how she ended up losing her key.
"Oh," the stranger's face turned a blank one, "Well, that sucks."
"Yeeeeeaah…" Kagome averted her eyes from him for a moment. That simple reply in that nonchalant tone made her feel awkward somehow.
"Okay, wait here," he commanded nonchalantly. Before she had the chance to even ask him what he was going to do, the hero leapt so high into the air that his bright-yellow suit faded into the darkness of the night sky.
"Uh..what?" She asked dumbly as she gawked up at the stars, wondering just what was going on.
A few seconds later, the swooshing sound of air molecules parting as a high velocity figure dove into the sea. The impact was so great that Kagome was sent flying backwards a few feet but she managed to sea that for a moment, the sea had parted, revealing the sandy, rocky, and weedy floor. If she were not freezing her butt of from being soaked, the young woman would have thought that she was dreaming! Once again, before she had the chance to even process what happened, a red gloved hand took hold of her own and dropped her key into it with a simple, "Here~"
Kagome looked up at the face of the total stranger who dive-punched the ocean to find her lost key. She was beyond astonished, almost speechless. She did not even care that his face was rather goofy looking when plastered onto that egg head of his. All that she knew that if she said nothing, it felt like her heart was going to jump right out of her chest. So she acted on her first impulse, which was to throw her arms around the neck of the man and pour heart out, "Thank you! Thank you so much!"
"Eheh, no problem~ It's what I do," the hero replied while patting the small woman on the head like a child. "Now let's get you home, eh?" That said, the bald man showed her his strong back before squatting down.
"O…okay…" She said unsurely as she climbed onto the stranger's back. Despite living in Z City all of her life, she had never met a hero in person before. While she did not necessarily expect for them all to be snobs, she also did not expect to find one that was so kind-hearted and sweet.
"So…where to?" The bald man asked as he stood up to his full height with Kagome on his back.
"Um…do you knew where Z University is?" She asked back.
"Oh, so you're a college girl," He stated rhetorically as he took off into the night at a speed that was fast, but not fast enough to be put his new charge in danger of falling off. "You look a lot younger" he told her while making small talk.
Kagome merely laughed into his ear, "Yeah, I get that a lot," she told him. She smiled at her reflection in his bald head. Her cheeks were a soft hue of pink and a content smile was on her face. This was definitely the best part of her day. 'I'm sure that not everyone gets the opportunity to spend time with a hero like this… I should make the best of it~' She told herself inwardly as her smile widened at her own thoughts. "Hey, hero?" She asked.
"Hm?" He tried to turn his head and look at her but she clung too closely for there to be much room for movement. "What's up, kiddo?"
Kagome found that it was easy to be open and honest about her feelings when he was unable to look at her face, "You've made my night amazing~ Thank you so much!"
"Eheh, glad that I could be of service," He replied modestly, she could practically hear his smile.
"May I ask a favor of you?" She pressed on.
"Another favor?" He asked in a playful tone. "You're running up quite the tab, missy."
Kagome merely giggled and gently squeezed his shoulders, "you'd have my eternal gratitude~."
"Fine, fine," He sighed as if he were going to deny her request, even though she was sure that he would not have.
"I've dreamed of being able to fly like a bird," She told him. "You're super strong. Wanna help me out?"
"Eh," His tone turned a bit more serious. "That sounds a bit dangerous for a girl like you."
"Oh, come on!" Kagome urged while playfully kicking her legs and lightly pushing on his backside.
"O-Oi!" He called back at her, tightening his grip on thighs, showing that he was actually concerned about dropping her. "Don't be so pushy! I'm the one in charge here!"
Kagome rolled her eyes but smiled nonetheless, "yeah, yeah. Big hero. Blah, blAHHHHHHHHHH!" Suddenly in the middle of her mocking him, the bald man hurled her through the air like a professional American football player would.
Meanwhile Saitama stood there for a moment, watching the young soar through the night air, "Ah…maybe I threw her too hard," he wondered as he watched her small body stay airborne for longer than expected. He shrugged before dashing and leaping into the air to save her life. To his surprise, instead of screaming in terror, the strange woman was laughing her ass off when she landed in his arms bridal-style.
"T-that was awesome!" She exclaimed through her teary eyes and fits of her laughter. She wiped a tear away before smiling up at him. "You're the best!" She told him with a goofy, lop-sided smile, obviously drunk off of her adrenaline rush. Saitama merely stared down at her and laughed as well. "Oh… We're here," she blinked as they landed right in front of her apartment.
"Yup, ride's over," he told her as he sat her down on her feet. He held out a gloved hand and smiled, "Now pay up, missy," he teased, obviously wanting to end their encounter on a light-hearted note.
But Kagome was not ready for their encounter to end.
"Sure," She whispered before quickly leaning up to the man and pressing her soft lips against his. To her surprise, his lips were warm and softer than she expected for a manly hero. And the rest was history…]
________________________________________
Saitama looked completely dumbfounded as Kagome stopped her story before getting into the dirty details,"…huh, so that night wasn't a dream… Weird."
Kagome's dreamy-eyed expression instantly turned into a sour one, "You're the only weird one here…" she said sharply before eyes went aflame, "And stop eating all of the beef, dammit!"
Genos sent a stern look to his mentor and nodded his head in agreement, "Kagome is right, Sensei. I have tallied your total number of meat strips consumed to be at twenty-two. Kagome and I only put thirty in the entire pot."
"Okay, one more then," The bald-headed man stated while reaching for a final-
Kagome dove across the table and slapped the hero's hand like a naughty child, "No more! Save some meat for me, dummy!"
Genos sweat dropped in the background, "I think you mean, save some for us…"
Saitama then turned into serious mode. His facial features becoming sharper and much more devilishly handsome. Kagome's breath hitched into her throat at the face. It was the face that remained the center of her wet dreams for months since that night. "I've got some meat saved for you right he-"
"Don't you dare finish that sentence, you creep!" Kagome screamed with tears in her eyes and her cheeks dyed a deep red as she grabbed Saitama by the collar and shook him senseless, all the while he merely smiled widely and laughed at her expense. Meanwhile Genos watched the pair while taking the last eight pieces of beef for himself. His mentor was laughing in an oddly amused manner as the tiny woman shook him hard to break a normal person's neck. Seeing two people who he liked so much get along made him feel warm and fuzzy inside.
To keep the good mood rolling, the cyborg urged his mentor and Kagome to try to recall more details about their first encounter. The answers from the two were nothing short of hilarious and embarrassing with the two of them taking shots at each other every chance that they could.
"I was only going to make-out with him," Kagome said at one point in a matter-of-fact tone. "He's the one who got hard from a little kissing!" She laughed at the blank face that she received from Saitama.
He then retorted in a monotone voice, "It doesn't take much to get your rocks off."
"H-humph! Says the guy who thought he could please a girl with the pace of a half-dead turtle~"
"Ah," Saitama paused for a moment. She had a point but there was a reasonable explanation for that, "you told me that it was your first ti-"
Once again, Genos found himself choking on his dinner. Kagome was instantly at his side, holding up a cup of warm tea up to his lips and helping him wash down the half-masticated food. The raven-haired woman glared at Saitama who blinked and stared at his disciple with his mouth ajar and eyes wider than usual, "Woah, Genos, you okay?"
"You idiot! That was too-much-information! You almost killed poor Genos!" Kagome scolded him while caressing the cyborg's pale cheek tenderly, a look of concern on her face.
Perhaps it was all the talk of love-making that had went on but just the light touch of her dainty fingers against the cyborg's face sent electric pulses coursing throughout his body. He shivered and unintentionally leaned into her touch.
"Ah, my bad, dude," came his mentor's reply.
Once Kagome determined that the blonde was in no danger of asphyxiating on his meal, she promptly returned to shaking Saitama senseless.
Yes, indeed. It was a wonderful sight to behold someone getting along with and appreciating his mentor as much as he did…
…but it was also somehow oddly uncomfortable. Something about watching them made him feel a bit uneasy. 'I will ask Dr. Kuseno to check my wiring to make sure that nothing is malfunctioning.'
Kagome had no idea how things led up to this but here she was in another odd situation. She was laying on her side in the darkness of a small, cramped living room. Her body was squeezed between her two male companions. Even after Saitama moved the table into the kitchen, the small living area was packed. Okay… There actually was enough place for all three of them to sleep on the floor with elbow room but somehow, night time seemed to be an especially magical time where everything went terribly wrong yet terribly right at the same time.
At first Kagome could not sleep and laid awake on her back while staring up at the unfamiliar ceiling. She spent a lot of time wondering what Saitama and Genos truly thought of her, especially after her confession of their meeting a year ago. At first, she thought that it would be awkward and Saitama would be creeped out that she wanted to get to know him further after that one-night stand. But the hero, nor pupil, seemed to mind her presence at all so she was unconsciously encouraged to stay a lot longer than she intended to.
Even after telling you that we've met before, I still didn't get the chance to tell you everything that was weighing on my mind for an entire year.
Like…for instance… I wanted to tell you about how much I regretted not ever asking for your name or getting a way to keep in touch with you.
I searched and searched for you on the Hero's Association registry and found nothing. I was so confused and disappointed. Even if you didn't feel anything for me romantically, I still wanted to get to know you.
Kagome sighed and closed her eyes, her body naturally shifted uncomfortably as her bottom began to go numb. Instinctively, she turned to her left and laid on that side. Upon opening her eyes, she expected to see Genos' back about a half meter away but instead, she came face-to-face with the cyborg's sleeping …well, face. Her eyes widened as she blushed from their proximity. Sure, she was pretty friendly with him but she was not quite ready to be so close that she could feel his shallow breaths against her lips.
The young woman shut her eyes and then decided to turn and lay on her right side, where Saitama was situated. 'Jeez, Genos… Thanks a lot,' she thought bitterly, not daring to open her eyes quite yet. 'You would end up so close to me like that!' It just was not fair! Even though she did not have any romantic feelings for the cyborg, she was still a young woman, ripen with desires and hormones and in her prime! She was not blind to how astonishingly attractive he was! When he was awake, and interacting with her, it was easy to be his pal and ignore ogling him. When he was sleeping so soundly so close to her…that was an entirely different story. Her mind left to wonder over what her body felt.
"What's wrong? Stomach ache?"
"Eh- Saitama?" She asked, cheeks flushing when her eyes open in response to the sudden voice. "You're awake?"
His signature big eyed, blank stare was her only answer.
"Oh, uh…" She stammered, realizing that he was waiting for an answer. "No, I just…can't sleep…"
"Ah," he propped his head up using his elbow as he continued staring at her. "You're not thinking of jumping my bones again, are you?" He asked with a light-hearted smile.
Kagome's face went beet red as she whisper-shouted, "A-As if! That was a one night thing!"
It was only after the hero laughed that she realized that he was only messing with her again. He smiled and added, "Too bad~ I was looking forward to it too" he teased, expecting another cute reaction that he was becoming more and more fond of.
Instead she took him by surprise by smiling impishly and placing a small hand on his hip, "Well, if you insist…" she trailed down to his inner thigh, "We can give it a go if you can be quiet~"
"O-Oi!" The bald man protested in the quietest voice he could muster as for once; his own cheeks were dyed light shade of red as he glared at the evil young woman lying next to him. "That's playing dirty!" He told her before turning away to face the wall and hide his face. For a moment, he completely lost his usual composure and was actually flustered.
Kagome merely giggled, not feeling bad about teasing one bit. It felt rather goodto get so deeply under his skin. But she decided to be nice and not pursue the matter, "Okay, okay~ I'm sorry~" she said in an appeasing pat him on the back gently to apologize. Though she would never admit it, she would have minded if something actually did happen between them in that moment.
"Kagome, Sensei, I detect that your levels of dopamine, oxytocin, amongst other hormones are increasing at an abnormal rate. Shall I perform a physical exa-"
"G-Go back to sleep, Genos!" Kagome commanded.
Within in an instant, the cyborg was laying back down in his futon with an obedient, "Yes, ma'am."
________________________________________
It was another low-traffic, boring afternoon at Maid Paradise, Kagome's workplace. Despite early afternoons being slow, no one on shift was ever sent home early like workers in fast food companies. So here she was again, sitting unladylike on the front counter where customers came to pay for their meals before leaving, and chatting with her fellow maids about the usual: their favorite heroes. It was only after she reunited with Saitama that Kagome actually found the conversations interesting. Usually she spaced out and pretended to listen to the chatter by smiling and nodding her head in agreement to whatever someone said.
Yuka, a young woman with bone-straight, shoulder-length black hair clapped her hands together as she gushed over the thought of her favorite hero, "I'm so glad that I was off last night! Amai-Mask appeared in a special interview on channel five yesterday!"
Eri, a sweet-hearted woman with naturally wavy hair that Kagome found herself secretly envious of, nodded twice enthusiastically, "I know, right?! He's so beautiful and elegant- like a true prince~" Kagome sighed inwardly despite her outward brilliant smile, she wondered if anyone would ever bring up heroes who she actually cared about: Saitama and Genos. She visited them so often and sometimes stayed over for extended periods of time that she was borderline living with them. She did not need a top three favorite heroes when she already had two who she knew person-
"Kagome-chan! Helloooooo? Are you going to answer?" Eri asked curiously while waving a hand in front of her colleague's face.
Eri then pointed out and giggled when Kagome's face flushed in embarrassment at being caught spacing out, "I bet Kagome-chan got so caught up in the conversation that she daydreamed about her dreamboat~"
The three young women squealed like high school girls at the thought of it. This caught the attention of the three other maids on duty: Koharu, Kagura, and Ayame and the seven maids formed a circle of young women leaning against counters, brooms, or sitting on buckets, chatting about their fantasies.
"So Kagome-chan, who is it~?" Ayame asked in a sharp tone. "It better not be my Speedy Tail!"
Yuka rolled her eyes at the red-haired, pig-tailed maid, "Oh can it. Kagome-chan isn't interested in your Koga guy," She told her while crossing her arms, "Not when heroes like AMAI-MASK EXISTS~!" She added in a dreamy voice.
That was it.
"Enough speaking up for me!" Kagome interjected. "I can speak for myself, thank you very much!"
"Then do it already!" the rest of the maids yelled back at her collectively, causing her to wince at the sheer volume and pitch of their cacophony.
"Fine…" She mumbled while tucking some of her long hair behind her ear. "My favorite heroes are…" She trailed off for a moment, a bead of sweat running down her forehead at the sight of her colleagues slowly inching towards her in anticipation. "…G-Genos and Saitama!"
The café was quiet for a moment…
"…who are they?" came the first whisper.
'Crap…' it felt like a large weight crashed down onto her shoulders when Kagome realized that most people called their heroes by their assigned nicknames! "U-Uh…I mean uh… The Demon Cyborg and…"
Kagome winced again when the group of maids shrieked in perfect unison, all of their eyes glowing brightly as they cupped their hands together.
"The Demon Cyborg… He's so handsome~!"
"And he looks so cool and collected all of the time!"
"I wish he'd look at me with those sexy eyes!"
Kagome huffed, as she did not get to finish telling them about how much she adored Saitama. The group of maids went off on a tangent about how cool and attracted Genos looked. As much as she too liked Genos. She still wanted to talk about… "SAITAMA IS THE COOLEST HERO OF ALL!" She suddenly screamed over everyone with her fists balled up passionately. She did not know what came over here but there it was: her heart on her sleeve. "HE'S STRONG, KIND, AND HANDSOME, EVEN IF HE'S BALD!"
"B-Bald…?"
"Saitama..?"
"She can't mean Caped Baldy, can she?"
"The rank leecher?"
"Mou…" Kagome huffed but resisted the urge to stomp her feet childishly like she did with Saitama. "You should know not to judge someone by rumors before you get to know them! You should act more like adults!" She chastised them with inflated, reddened cheeks.
Ayame smiled and poked Kagome's cheek, deflating the air that was puffing them up, "Look who's talkin', Mrs. Puff~" she teased and her fellow maids joined her for a collective laugh at Kagome's expense.
________________________________________
It was an oddly peaceful day in Z city today. No dangerous leveled threats were terrorizing the citizens like they usually did. No random villains crashing through the ceiling to challenge Saitama or Genos. It was a perfect day…too perfect. It was a nice, quiet day that mainly consisted of Saitama slouching around with a manga and Genos catching up on housework. All was calm and right until…
{Knock, knock}
The blonde cyborg peered at his mentor from the kitchen door, "Sensei, I believe that Kagome has come to visit us again." Genos stood there for a moment with a mop in hand before he heard another pair of soft knocks at the front door. "Shall I let her in, Sensei?"
Saitama scratched his head before hopping to his feet, "Nah, it's cool. I got it." He felt like getting under her skin by making her knock at least two hundred times before he answered, but with how earnest Genos was…he would never be able to pull off that troll with his disciple around. "Yeah, yeah…" He almost groaned as he unlocked and opened the door.
Kagome was still dressed her maid costume as she greeted him with an alluring, coy smile while squirming in a timid manner, "H-how…may I serve you today, Master?" She asked before slowing batting her eyelashes.
For a moment, she felt victorious as he stared at her with wide eyes and slightly ajar lips…
"…goodbye," was his reply as he moved to swing the door closed.
"Wait, a sec!" Kagome shrieked as she threw her feet in the door at the last second. "I was kidding, jeez!"
Saitama stared at Kagome with his blank, goofy face.
Kagome stared at Saitama with her pouty, puffy face.
Genos looked between them both with his typical, focused face.
"Well? What is it this time?"
"What's that supposed to mean?"
"You show up whenever you have a bad day."
"H-Hey, not true!"
"Sensei, she is correct. Kagome shows up good moods very often."
Saitama looked uninterested as he picked his nose with one hand and held up his manga in the other.
Kagome's pouted deepened, "I want you to come to Maid Paradise."
"Nope," the bald man replied while turning a page.
Genos held up his hand like a child in a classroom, "I am willing to visit your work place, Kagome."
Kagome laughed sheepishly as her eyes shifted from side to side as she tried to think of the kindest way to put her next thought, "Well uh…I actually don't need you to come, Genos."
Instantly, the cyborg deflated and his bangs shielded his eyes and he fell into a depression.
"W-Well, that doesn't mean that I don't want you there though!" Kagome added in as her arms flailed about. "You're naturally invited if I invite Saitama!"
Genos' head immediately lifted as he returned to normal rather quickly. When it came to Saitama and Kagome, this particular cyborg was easily pacified.
Kagome then turned her attention back to Saitama, she clapped her hands together and smiled brightly, "So? How about it, Tama?" She put a sweet emphasis on the new nickname.
The bald man did not seem phased by the nickname at all as he did not look up from his manga, "Genos can go. That place looks expensive. I'm not made of money."
"…I'll make your entire meal free," Kagome said.
"What day and time?!" He suddenly was on his feet with balled up fists.
"Tomorrow, 1:30PM~" Kagome smiled as she made her own determined fists.
"Sensei, you fell for her bait hook, line, and sinker."
The maid then waved Genos off, "come on now~ All is fair in love and war! Let's go celebrate!"
"Is today a special occasion?"
"Of course! It's "Kagome Conquered Saitama Day"!"
________________________________________
"Eh… You okay?" Saitama asked Kagome, who was sitting on a stool next to him with deeply flushed cheeks and hazy eyes. When he saw the young woman wobbly from side to side, he placed a hand on her shoulder to steady her, "Oi! You had too much!"
Kagome merely groaned as if she were tired before turning to her left to look at her companions. "I…did…NAWT!" She exclaimed in a slurred protest. "You're not having fun…?" She glared at him and pouted as usual.
The bald man gently swished his drink around in his tiny, shot glass and replied, "Meh, ever since I became this strong, it takes a lot longer for me to get buzzed."
Kagome frowned as she leaned over and wrapped her arm around Saitama's shoulder and whined, "Mou, superhumans like you are no fun!" She then looked beyond him over to Genos, who was sitting to Saitama's left and two stools away from her. "Nee, Genos… Are you as alcohol tolerant as Tama here?"
The cyborg looked over at her, his normally pale cheeks had a slight red tinge to them, "As a cyborg, I too require a large amount of alcohol to become intoxicated, but it is not impossible."
Kagome grinned cheekily at hearing that and leaned further on Saitama until her torso was sprawled across his lap. She ignored his signature "Oi!" that he used to get her attention or protest against her to give Genos a toothy smile and raise a toast to him with her ½ full shot glass.
"That's what I like to hear~ Drink up with me! You're the best, Genos!" She encouraged him.
That encouragement, praise, and smile was all that the blond needed to proceed tossing back shot after shot while the remained in Saitama's lap, clapping and cheering for the cyborg gleefully. "Go, Genos! Go!"
"Are you even allowed to get drunk, dude? It won't scramble your circuits?"
"…..I assure you that my body is strong enough to hiccup handle something as hiccup trivial as liquor."
Kagome giggled and fist pumped the air, "That's the spirit, Geny! You're awesome!" She then looked up at Saitama's blank expression, "not like this stick in the mud," she added sourly while glowering at him.
Saitama merely sighed and smiled while patting her head, "You're such a brat."
Kagome pouted before laying her head down in his lap. The hero tensed when her cheek landed on a rather personal area. "Tama…can I ask you something?"
"You're going to ask no matter what I say."
"S-Sensei…hiccup…you should take it easy on he-ccup every once in a while…"
Saitama gritted his teeth and glared at the blond, "Don't side with this brat!"
"Saitama…" Kagome whispered while tugging on his shirt, successfully bring his attention back to her. "…i-is a citizen girl like me no good?" She asked in a soft voice. The hero-for-fun found himself almost speechless at the sight of her deep, tender-looking eyes.
"Eh?"
"Or do you prefer women who look more mature?" She asked with a small pout on her lips. She continued asking questions without waiting for answers, "Do you really hate my job that much? …Am I not girlfriend material to you? Would dating someone like me be too embarrassing?"
For once Saitama felt caught off guard, even flustered. If his two companions were not wasted, they would have noticed that he was blushing the way Kagome usually was from his teasing. He looked left and right to make sure that no one was around to witness his embarrassment. Fortunately, the only other person inside of the small, adult lounge was the bartender, a much older gentleman who was too busy cleaning glasses to notice their conversation, or just "heard it all" before so didn't care.
"I-Idiot, what are you going on about so suddenly?!" The hero asked as he pulled the woman off his lap with one hand and placed her back onto her stool. Despite his annoyance at her antics, he still had the heart to hold her steady by her shoulder.
"Sensei…hiccup…" Genos completely turned his body so that it was facing Kagome and Saitama. His hands were resting on each leg as fists. Despite his red cheeks and occasional hiccups, Genos maintained his usual expression, "I too am curious about how you feel about Kagome. Please answer us."
Kagome giggled as she slumped against Saitama again, "See~? Even Genos wants to know! Tell us, Tama~!"
"Sensei, please…" The intoxicated cyborg began to imitate Kagome in whining to her way to victory.
"Tama…" she tugged on his shirt. "Tama. Tama. Tama. Hey, Tama. Tammmmmaaaaaaaa."
"Sensei. Sensei. Sensei. Sensei. Sensei." He tugged relentlessly at the other side of Saitama's shirt.
Saitama found himself becoming more and more annoyed by the obnoxious duo who was double-teaming him into submission.
"Taaammmaaa! Tammmmaaaa!"
"Senseiiiiiiii. Seeeeeenseeeei."
More and more angry veins popped out of his shining forehead.
"ENOUGH, YOU IDIOTS! I CAN'T BELIEVE THAT YOU'RE THIS DAMN ANNOYING!"
Genos then shrunk away with his head bowed in shame and dejection, "Y-Yes, Sensei…"
Once his disciple was taken care of, Saitama then turned his attention to Kagome who was leaning her forehead against his shoulder, grumbling about something incoherently. "As for you!" He continued to yell while lifting her chin up by one thumb to force her eyes to meet his. His usual comical face suddenly transformed into a more serious and defined, chisel form. "You want to know?" He asked in a voice so low that it made Kagome shiver in delight. She nodded slowly as she was too entranced by his face to speak.
Even in her drunken haze, Kagome instinctively leaned up closer to Saitama's face as his slowly closed the distance between them more and more. She closed her eyes and awaited the soft contact that she had no felt in a year.
{DOINK!}
Saitama flicked her forehead, causing the young woman to squeak in surprise. "H-Hey! You're such a tease!" She glared up at him as her eyes clearly burned with disappointment. She groaned and wobbled as he pulled her to her feet with one hand.
"Time to go," He announced before looking at Genos, who was still lamenting over his mentor exploding at him, "You okay to walk, dude?"
The cyborg attempted to nod his head affirmatively but instead ended up face planting onto the hard bar counter surface, creating a small crater in the marble.
Saitama stared at his disciple with a blank expression, "…I'm not paying for that."
Man… Kagome was a bad influence on Genos. Never before had the cyborg been such a pain in the ass.
'But…it's become a lot more fun too…' The bald hero thought to himself as he tucked each of his companions beneath his armpits like sacks of potatoes. He looked down at the maid who grinned up at him with a large, toothy smile and smiled. 'You annoying girl…'
________________________________________
Saitama carefully laid (the passed-out) Kagome down onto the spare futon that Genos had purchased especially for her visits. He removed her frilly maid headband and then her dress shoes. 'Genos must be rubbing off on me,' he thought to himself when he noticed how he was working hard to make sure that she was comfortable. His dark eyes settled on her stock-covered legs… They looked skin tight and probably uncomfortable to sleep in. He swallowed a lump in his throat as he stared at her thighs. His fingers grabbed a loose hold of the hems of her stockings that clung tighter to her skin due to the light layer of sweat that coated her body from her intoxication.
He mentally cursed his body's and memory's timing as his hands being so close to her nether regions brought back memories of that faithful. It was just not the hours of passion that came to his mind. It was scenes that seemed to have faded from his mind over time that suddenly flooded back to him…
________________________________________
[ The night was hot and sticky with the heat of summer and humidity of the summer. Superhuman abilities be damned. There was nothing worse than a sleepless summer night without air conditioning! Even sleeping naked did his body no justice. "It's HOT!" He shouted in frustration while kicking his hot futon away from him.
'I need to cool off…'
That thought led him to pulling on his uniform and heading towards the closest 24-hour store. He was dying for a popsicle! The bald hero even took his time strolling through the empty aisles to bask in the cool comfort of the air-conditioned, brightly lit store. It was not intentional but upon exiting the store, he happened to overhear the banter of a group of young men who was hanging around the store's entrance with clearly nothing to do but talk and talk.
"So you struck out with that Higurashi chick, huh?"
"Yeah," another replied in angry tone before he laughed, "But I got her back by throwing her keyring in the friggin ocean!"
Saitama paused in his strides and licking of his treat to listen closer.
"Wow, you're a dick!"
"That's awesome!"
"Ch'yeah, I know. And I heard that she has no roommate or family nearby so she's probably still out there at the beach looking for them!"
"Didn't the tide come in by now?"
"Oh…yeah… Oh well, maybe she drow-…"
The young man then gulped nervously when he was suddenly overshadowed by a slightly older looking man with a look that could almost literally kill. "You…" Saitama nearly seethed as he placed his hand on the sweating guy's shoulder, "That girl you were talking about… Which beach is she on?"
The young man looked around at his friends, who were all glaring at their unwelcomed guest, and suddenly felt confident that their numbers would keep him safe. "What's it to ya?!"
In under sixty seconds, Saitama got the information that he needed and he took off in a mad dash in the direction of the beach. He left the group of college boys lying on the ground unconscious and bruised. His half-eaten popsicle was melting on top of the head of the man who boasted about taking revenge on a woman who rejected him…
The hero would have preferred that the woman had gone somewhere else but the fact that she supposedly had nowhere to go unnerved him. He had to at least go and look! Within a matter of minutes, Saitama had arrived at the beach that the guys claimed to have been. The entire area that would have been covered in sand during the day was submerged already. He would have given up on searching until he heard a feminine voice screaming out in frustration.
That was his cue.
The hero jumped into the air and landed on a dock, the source of the angry screams. And there she was… A young girl in a light blue sundress decorated with a sunflower pattern. Her hair was long, dark and trickled down to her waist. "Uh… Are you okay? He asked her. It was actually pretty amusing to witness her nearly jump out of her skin as she turned to face him.
It was one of the best nights that he had in a long time. Where he found no joy or excitement in fighting villains anymore, he somehow found a sort of warmth in the short time that he spent with this young woman- who he had mistaken for a high schooler. Ordinarily, he would have pegged her as obnoxious for being so familiar, demanding, and expecting of a complete stranger. But this one was different from most civilians.
She took his claim to be a hero at face value and seemed to relish in it. Her eyes sparkled when she looked at him and she seemed thrilled to be around him. Best of all, she was appreciative of the favor that he had done for her. Saitama found himself smiling and complying to every request and demand that she asked of him. It was hard not doing what someone so cute and sweet wanted. After he let her experience what she called "flying", she clung to him even harder, though there was no way that she was hurting him or making him comfortable.
"Hey, Hero…" The blue-eyed woman said to get his attention.
He looked down at her, "Yeah?"
"This was the best night ever~" She told him while smiling brightly. "I'll always appreciate what you've done for me! You took the time to help someone like me…" She trailed off for a moment before beaming again. "Thanks again. I love you~!"
His eyes widened and he looked up ahead of him to hide his pink tinted cheeks. "Anytime," he replied, trying to sound cool and retain her positive image of him. He decided to forgive her for being so bratty and not hiding that she was sniffing him while in his arms.]
________________________________________
Saitama smiled fondly at the memory as he peeled and pulled the slightly damp stockings down from her legs and carelessly tossed them away. Genos, who had already recovered from his bout of intoxication, dutifully collected the pieces of Kagome's costume that his mentor discarded without much thought. For once, the cyborg did not speak his mind. He silently watched his teacher take care of the young with a hidden fascination. It did not take a genius like Dr. Kuseno to deduct that even though he did not care to show it directly, Saitama was just as smitten with Kagome as she was with him.
The blond then placed a hand to his breast plate and left it there. 'What is this tightness that I am feeling?' He wondered as Saitama finally tucked Kagome neatly into her futon. 'My body has been experiencing very peculiar symptoms as of late. Perhaps I am in need of another maintenance.' After deciding to check-in with his doctor and father-figure, Genos proceeded to head to bathroom to hand wash Kagome's sweaty stockings.
________________________________________
Kagome slowly blinked her blurred vision away. She was staring up at a familiar ceiling: the one in Saitama's and Genos' living room. 'Why…am I here…?' She thought to herself before groaning at an intense pain in her head. "Tama…" she groaned out while sitting up slowly in her futon. "Genos?" She looked around and listened for the sound of anyone but discovered the apartment to be empty. "Oh… Huh…?" She blinked and noticed a plate sitting on the small dining table. The achy woman crawled across the small floor space.
A piece of paper that was folded in half to form a tent-shaped note that stood on its own was sitting there. "My name is written on it…" She said to herself. She flipped the note open and read it, "Kagome, you're a light weight. Saitama." Her eye twitched and read a second part to the note, "I left you some pain medication, herbal tea, and lunch in the refrigerator. I took the liberty of calling your manager and told him that you needed the day off. I hope that you recover from your imminent hangover. Genos." She smiled at the note before heading to the kitchen to eat her lunch.
'Oh…it's 5 already…' She thought to herself with wide eyes. 'How long was I sleeping?!' The young woman would have been freaking out over missing work but she trusted that Genos handled those affairs for her. She did not remember much about the night before besides that she promised to treat her two best friends to a meal at Maid Paradise. 'I guess we need to reschedule that…' she thought to herself. 'Oh well.' With a shrug, she decided to make the most of her evening off~ She drew herself a hot bath and decided to relax before getting started on dinner.
'Maybe I should go all out tonight to thank them for taking care of me again,' she mused before sinking beneath the surface of the water. 'Yeah, Saitama has been working hard lately… I'll help him out~"
A few hours later the heroic duo finally returned home after a long, drawn-out meeting for S classed heroes that Saitama was once again dragged into it. The bald hero spent the majority of the meeting spacing out and tapping his foot anxiously, as if he had Restless Leg Syndrome. "Genos, next time there's a meeting you S ranks…don't invite me," he commanded as the cyborg followed his idol into their apartment.
The blond bowed his head respectfully while closing his eyes, "Yes, Sensei. My apologies. I assumed th-"
Saitama held up a gloved hand to signal his pupil to be silent. "Hold that thought- What's that smell?"
Genos closed his eyes and inhaled the lovely aroma filling the room, "I believe that Kagome has dinner prepared." His eyes shot open at the sound of an overly confident, feminine laugh.
There in the kitchen door stood Kagome with a triumphant, almost cocky grin on her face and her hands on her hips. "It's not just dinner, my dear Genos~ It's our feast!" She announced with pride.
Instead of smiling and thanking her for being a sweetheart like she had envisioned, Saitama glowered at her as he walked towards the kitchen, "Oiiii…" he grumbled, "Is that my favorite hoodie?!"
She blinked and looked down at her attire: a baseball styled gray and red hoodie complete with the word "OPPAI" and a pair of cartoony breasts imprinted on the front. "Yeah," she replied innocently before tilting her head to the side, "Why?"
Saitama stood straight and tall above her to emphasize their difference in height and build. He placed his hands on his hips as he frowned down at her and scolded, "I get that we're close but aren't you getting too cozy around here?"
Kagome returned his glare with one of her own and a small pout, "well, my uniform was dirty and I didn't have a change of clothes."
"You could have called," The bald man insisted, raising his voice slightly and adding a bit of sternness to his tone. "You always seem to find a way to reach me. Now bow your head, "he commanded as his face became more serious.
Genos frowned, feeling concerned about the situation that was unfolding in front of him. "S-Sensei, I think that scolding her is good enough! He spoke up from his spot a few meters away from them.
Saitama looked over at his pupil, his face still serious, "You being soft on her only enables her," he pointed out, causing Genos' eyes to wide before he shrunk away to mull over his sensei's words. "Brace yourself, Kagome."
The young woman shut her eyes and kept her head bowed as she waited for the impact: a bop on the head, a flick to her forehead, or a pinching of her cheeks- she was used to Saitama "punishing" her with things like that whenever she "crossed the line". For a moment, there was nothing but silence until she finally felt a strong hand rubbing the top of her head gently. "Permission to use granted."
"!" Kagome's eyes shot open along with her mouth as she tried to express her frustration in being misled but the playful smile on Saitama's face left her with nothing words caught in her throat.
"Dinner's in here, right?" Saitama asked curiously while attempting to walk past Kagome to enter the kitchen. He was halted by a small hand clutching his sleeve. He looked down at the small woman whose cheeks were red and eyes stared up at him, as big and wide as a doe's.
"You two just relax at the table," Kagome's blushed intensified as she spoke. "Tonight, is entirely on me!" She told him while giving her chest a light thump of her fist.
"Okay," He gave in easily, feeling lazy after a long, boring day anyway. "What's on the menu?"
"You'll see~" She chimed while skipping happily into the kitchen, the slight raising of her legs giving Saitama a glimpse of her pink, silky panties. Saitama twitched and immediately turned away to sit at the dining table across from Genos.
After a couple of minutes of Kagome scurrying hastily back and forth between the kitchen and the dinner table, the feast was finally spread across the center of the table. Saitama stared at the assortment of dishes with wide eyed, blank face. "There we go~ We can start now!" She announced after setting a whole, baked chicken down in front of Genos.
"What are you up to?" Saitama asked while raising an eyebrow suspiciously at her.
"Sensei, I believe that Kagome is simply trying to do kind deed for us," Genos chimed in.
"That's right~ I'm just that type of person~" Kagome beamed at her blond friend.
"Traitor," Saitama mumbled as he began filling his plate with a bit of everything.
"Quiet, you~" Kagome nearly sang as she watched her friends all of her dishes. Sure, she spent more than she normally would on food today but it was worth it! She really wanted to spoil them for all of the times that they indulged her and her antics~
"May I have something to drink?" Saitama suddenly asked while looking at her.
"Eh- Right! I forgot the tea!" She exclaimed while lightly bonking herself on the head. "I'll be right back, okay~?" She asked rhetorically while jumping to her feet and scampering back into the kitchen to fetch their beverages. Meanwhile Genos silently analyzed his sensei's actions as the bald man openly stared at the woman as she exited and re-entered the room with a tray in her hands. "Sorry the wait~" She apologized with a smile as she placed three cups on the table and began distributing the tea.
"Kagome," Genos suddenly called for her attention as she handed Saitama his cup.
"Hm?" She simply asked, smiling down at the cup but still actively listening to the cyborg.
"I analyzed Sensei's behavioral and biological patterns and have concluded that he is most stimulated when you are in his clothing," He stated informatively and rather bluntly as he accepted his cup of tea.
"Sppfft!" Saitama spat his tea out as Kagome's eyes lit her up and she cupped her hands. "G-Genos!" the exposed hero protested while throwing his follower a warning glare.
"Is that so?" She asked in awe. She then turned to look at Saitama with a cattish smile, "So that's your kink, huh~?" She teased while giggling behind her hand.
"It is not, b-baka!" The bald man stammered a bit as he looked away, trying to hide his blush.
"On the contrary, Sensei," Genos interjected. "I observed that youhave stared at her 350% more than usual tonight. Your heart rate has also accelerated mor-"
"Genos…" Saitama mumbled in a dark tone as his facial expression became grave. "Do you want to be punched?" He asked in a deep voice.
Genos sweated a bit and looked a bit startled, "No, Sensei-!"
Kagome laughed as she leaned over and patted Saitama's shoulder, "Don't worry, Tama~" she said in reassuring tone, "There's nothing to be embarrassed about!"
"I am not emb-!"
She then placed her hands on her cheeks, blushing a bit as she smiled affectionately. A sparkly background appearing as she added, "It's okay to love me~"
Genos raised his and voiced his opinion, "I concur! Sensei and Kagome would make a great cou-"
Before the two continue double-teaming him, the bald man grabbed one of their cheeks with each hand and gave them both a slight pinch, "Cut it out, you two. Your alliance needs to end here and now."
Kagome groaned as she rubbed her reddened cheek, "Jeez, you need to learn to take a joke, Tama!"
Saitama replied bluntly, "You may say that but Genos, here," he gestured at the cyborg with his thumb, "Is dead serious. I don't even knowif he's capable of joking."
"Actually, Dr. Kuseno has used his genius to ensure that I am capable of all ordinary human activities, including humorous endeavors," Genos explained while raising a finger. "Observe. Knock, knock."
Kagome beamed and played along, "Who's there~?"
"I am," He concluded, his voice and face as calm as ever.
Kagome faltered as Saitama sweatdropped and stated," I don't think that's how that works, dude."
Kagome gave her best considerate laugh before she noticed Saitama chewing on a baked chicken leg…and the boney remains of the other leg sitting on his plate. "Hey now! I wanted the other leg, Tama!" She exclaimed with almost watery eyes.
"Oops."
"No, oops! You always hog- Oomph!" Her complaining was cut short by Saitama casually pushing the remainder of the leg into her mouth. She glared at him but chewed on it, instantly feeling satisfied by the gesture.
Genos watched the scene unfold with a small smile. Once again, he found that he was touched that his sensei had found someone who cared about him and who he obviously cared for in return. He almost pointed out how Saitama was a bit of hypocrite with how he scolded his follower for always pampering this young woman when he too was always quick to give into her blue eyes. Still…his chest felt oddly tight despite that all of his systems were green and functioning properly.
________________________________________
I know that I wormed my way into your lives.
I know that acted informally with you right away, without really having the right to.
I know that I took advantage of your kindness so many times.
But I'm sorry, I didn't mean to, honestly.
I was just acting on my feelings and listening to my heart.
And my heart told me that I wanted to be with you.
Saitama grew silent as he continued reading the end of the letter in his head as it became more and more intimate. Nothing in the letter was particularly shocking or eye-opening to him, but he pressed on and read it in its entirety.
I noticed that lately our relationship has become a bit ambiguous.
I don't know if you feel the way but that's how it feels to me.
I'm probably being presumptuous but…
I feel like you might feel the same way that I do.
But you've been holding back while I've been pushing forward.
I'm sorry for acting so selfishly and nothing of what you want more often.
The hero stiffened as he read the next part of the letter. He did not expect her to be so observant and to know him so well… 'I should have known that she'd know me… She's been watching me all of this time.'
I wonder if you're holding back because you're afraid of dragging me into danger.
Or maybe you're holding back because you don't want to hurt Genos…
Don't worry. I feel the same way.
I love Genos too. I don't want to see him hurt either.
So I feel uneasy about moving forward sometimes, knowing how he feels about me.
You two are so sweet together. Genos is my little cinnamon roll and you're my /u/ !
Saitama stifled a laugh at Kagome's use of a cute emoji instead of an actual noun to describe him.
I don't to ruin your friendship.
So that's why I decided to move on.
"…" Saitama was unaware of how his face visibly paled. Genos however detected his massive fluctuation in heart rate. "That…idiot..." He whispered, feeling an intense concoction emotions that no one person ever elicited from him at once.
You know how I just graduated last week, right?
Well, I decided that I'm going to start my life anew somewhere~
I'm not sure where I'll go or what I'll do yet but I'm sure that it'll be fun~
I got the feeling that you two would try to stop me so that's why I'm telling this via letter.
First… Let me say what I wanted to on the day of our reunion…
"Genos…" Saitama whispered, "I'll be back. Take care of lunch while I'm gone."
"Wait, Sensei," The cyborg suddenly called out as his mentor opened the front door.
"What's up? I'm in a hurry," Saitama blinked and asked curiously.
"You and Kagome…don't have to be considerate of me," the young man stated. "Besides Dr. Kuseno, you two are the most important people in the world to me… Ever since I lost my family, I thought that I was alone-"
"Twenty words or less, dude."
"R-Right!" Genos gave his sensei a thumbs-up, "Go get her." Before adding a small smirk appear on his face, "But just know that I will work hard to catch up to your strength and I will steal her away."
Saitama merely smiled at the cyborg and half joked, half challenged with a thumbs-up of his own, "We'll see about that." And with that, he took off in a rush towards the train station. According to the letter that she had written a few days prior, he had about an hour before her train arrived. 'Kagome, I'm coming.'
Did I ever get to ask you if you were embarrassed to date a civilian?
'You did. You were just too drunk to remember.' The hero raced until he was out on a busy street with countless vehicles zooming by. He easily leaped from car roof to car roof as he rushed around the city to find Kagome. His first destination was the train station to check if she may have gone there early.
Hehheh, I know that I'm probably too weak to stand by your side.
But if you'd let me, I would be, forever and ever.
'What do you think I've been doing all of this time, baka?' He mentally asked her, as if she could hear his thought from where ever she was.
If only I could travel back in time*, I'd go and relive these years all over again.
You'd think that I would told you how I felt after all of this time.
Even though I acted confident and flirted with you a lot, I was still nervous about it.
The truth is…
Saitama grunted as his eyes scanned left, right, up, and down and he searched high and low for Kagome in the crowds upon crowds of busy commuters. It did not help that she was a bit short for her age!
Saitama, I'm your biggest fan.
I've absolutely adored you ever since the night that we first met.
________________________________________
Kagome sighed as she sat idly on the dock where she first met Saitama. The tides were low so her legs that swung over the edge of the platform could not reach the surface of the water. Sitting next to her was her small suitcase of her essential worldly belongings: some clothing and other personal items. She smiled wistfully down at the strip of photos from a photo booth that she, Saitama, and Genos once squeezed into after she gave them her infamous puppy eyes. Her blues eyes misted up before tears pelted the slick surface of the photos one by one.
The top photo was a normal one where Kagome smiled brightly; Saitama yawned; and Genos stared directly at the lens calmly. The second photo asked them to act surprise: Kagome placed her hands on her cheeks and opened her mouth to simulate "The Scream"; Saitama's face had big, bulging eyes; and Genos stared at the lens calmly. The next one the machine instructed them to make silly faces so Saitama crossed his eyes while Kagome grabbed the edges of Genos' mouth and stretched them out into a huge, creepy smile as she stuck her tongue playfully. Finally, Kagome's face was complete red as her companions who were sitting on each side of her both kissed her cheeks, as the machine suddenly instructed.
'At least…I'll always have this. I'll be able to see their faces every day,' She comforted herself inwardly before a cruel, powerful gust of sea wind swooped in and snatched the photo strip free from her hand. "Eh?! No!" She shouted as she stared in shock at her souvenir danced happily as it was carried up and away by the wind. "You gotta be kidding me!" She shouted while stomping her feet. For a moment, she was angry…but that anger was soon replaced by a wave of sorrow. It did not matter if anyone saw or heard her. She wept openly and loudly. Her hands covered her eyes but those small hands could not hide the endless trails of tears that poured that streamed down her face. 'Why is it that I only feel lucky when I'm with Saitama and Genos?' She asked the gods miserably.
"Jeez, you really ought to take better care of your things," a familiar voice said calmly from behind her.
'No way-' Her midnight sky colored hair cascaded around her as she whipped to face the voice head on. "Sai…tama…" She whispered as her red, puffy eyes stared at him in disbelief. It felt like she was dreaming, just as on that fateful night. But it was real, and so was he.
Saitama shook his head at her while smiling and holding up her precious photo strip between two fingers, "You want it, don't you?" She nodded quietly while wiping her tears away as he approached her. He smiled warmly as he held her precious souvenir out to her. Kagome gave a small, watery smile as her hand slowly reached for-
"Eek!"
{SPLASH}
Kagome gasped for air as she resurfaced then cringed at the taste of salty water in her mouth. She glared up at the hero who was standing at the edge of the dock, smiling casually at her. "What was that for, you jerk?!" She shouted as she extended her arm towards him. He complied and reached down to grab her hand and pull her back onto the dock with ease.
"That was punishment for being stupid," He replied simply while grabbing her suitcase and walking away from her.
Kagome huffed and glared at his back before running to catch up to him, "What do you mean stupid?!"
"Well," The egg head explained, "You left a runaway note and told exactly when you'd be running away. You were practically begging to be caught."
Her cheeks darkened as she retorted, "I was not! I was just…I didn't think that you'd come looking for me…" her voice trailed off as she stared at the ground.
But it's not just that one night that I'm talking about.
I'm grateful for all of the time that you've spent with me.
I'm grateful for all of the times that let me stay with you with no questions asked.
I'm grateful for how many times you've walked me home from work.
All of it…everything that you could possibly think of- I'm grateful for.
Saitama looked up at the sky to avoid her gaze, even though she was walking behind him with her head down. "Well uh…" He began, not realizing that he was blushing a bit as he spoke, "How could I just let you go after you sent me that letter?" Kagome groaned aloud as she covered her face with her hands. "Besides I still owe you an ass-kicking on Manlio Kart** for all the times you cheated," he added.
"I did not cheat! You just suck ass at steering!"
I'm grateful to the gods for allowing me to meet you.
Saitama…you're…
"Ahhhh," The bald man suddenly sighed aloud. "You walk too slowly," he said before crouching down to the ground. "Hop on. We need to get you dry quickly or you'll catch a cold."
Kagome raised an eyebrow, "even though you're the one who got me all wet in the first place?" she asked while climbing onto his back.
He grinned cheekily over his shoulder at her and teased, "Hot."For setting herself up for that jole, he smiled inwardly and once again, forgave her for blatantly inhaling his scent and sighing deeply, as if she was drunk off of him.
"Oh, shut up, baldy!" Kagome huffed before laughed when he threatened to throw her off if she said that one more time. "There's no way that you'd seriously let me get hurt so I'm not afraid~"
"What makes you so sure?" He asked while glaring up ahead, still annoyed at being called bald.
The woman on his back tightened her grip around his neck as she leaned close to his ear. The light feeling of her breath sent delicious tingles down his spine. "Because," she whispered, "you're my hero…"
________________________________________
[Omake]
"Uh… Tama… what's going on here?"? Kagome asked as she blinked down at the single futon laying in the middle of the living room floor. "Where's Genos?" She questioned while propping open her suitcase to find some dry clothes to wear.
"Oh, I found a note," He said casually.
"What does it say?" She asked, temporarily abandoning her clothes to stand by Saitama's side.
"Sensei, Kagome… I have prepared a futon for you, fore I presume that you will want to copulate upon your return. The lunch that you requested is in the refrigerator. I will return by 6PM to give you enough time… Genos." Saitama's eye twitched as he finished reading. "That guy-… Ah?"
Kagome nibbled on her bottom lip cutely as she stared up at him with seductively timid eyes, "Well, if that's what you want," she whispered as she closed her eyes and leaned up towards her hero's face- "Kyaa!" -only to have Saitama hold her back with one finger to her forehead. "Hey! We have his permission, baka!" She exclaimed while pouting.
Saitama stifled a laugh before he smiled at her regardless, "You're such a dork."
"That's my line!" She pouted while crossing her arms. "You know you want me," she mumbled.
"Do you want me to break your back that badly?" He asked, tilting his egg-shaped head with a goofy face on.
Kagome pretended to mull over the question for a moment... "Maybe…"
"Fine," Saitama replied, giving into that youthful, sweet face that he came to love. He crossed his arms and stated firmly, "But first, you must service me to prove how badly you want it."
Kagome nodded enthusiastically as she began to unzip his body suit to reveal his muscular physique. "Yes, Master~" She replied submissively as she got onto her knees and set his hot rod free.
Saitama's serious face almost broke as he felt himself twitch and stand at attention after hearing her say that. 'Okay…' he admitted to himself. 'That was hot.'
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10604352
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In Our Bedroom After the
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{
"Archive Warning": "No Archive Warnings Apply",
"Category": "M/M",
"Characters": "Gaston (Disney), LeFou (Disney)",
"Fandom": "Beauty and the Beast (2017)",
"Language": "English",
"Rating": "Explicit",
"author": "by Riachinko",
"chapters": "1/1",
"completed": "",
"published": "2017-04-20T00:00:00",
"words": "5,178",
"Additional Tags": "Foreplay, Anal Sex, Sounding, Body Worship, Plot What Plot/Porn Without Plot, Well there's a niggling of a plot maybe idk, Blow Jobs, Hand Jobs, Hero Worship, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Socks, Mildly Dubious Consent, Light Bondage",
"Relationship": "Gaston/LeFou (Disney)",
"Character": null,
"Relationships": null,
"Series": null,
"Collections": null,
"Fandoms": null,
"Archive Warnings": null,
"Categories": null,
"Bookmarks": null,
"Chapters": null,
"Comments": null,
"Completed": null,
"Hits": null,
"Kudos": null,
"Published": null,
"Words": null,
"Updated": null
}
|
At nights when Gaston would wake up at 4am sweaty, gasping and dehydrated with a pounding headache, he called for LeFou. And LeFou was always there, attentive and selfless. He'd hand Gaston a glass of water, he'd massage his shoulders.
He always had the right words to calm the man down.
Their living arrangements had begun innocently enough with LeFou as Gaston’s carer; a sort of personal valet, hunting partner, confidant. They'd been friends for years, after all, and the role came naturally to LeFou, having served a similar purpose during the war. After the battle overseas in Quebec, with Gaston now having been a Captain, LeFou’s role carried slightly more gravity - the man was a valued hero of war, and although LeFou didn't carry any such title, his proximity to Gaston gave him a bolstered sense of worth and confidence.
And Gaston wasn't without scars from the war - though mostly metaphorical - that only LeFou could understand and anoint.To soothe them, back massages turned into body massages turned into handjobs and drinks of water led to Gaston’s mouth hungrily on LeFou’s. Physical pleasure helped to forget the pain they both had seen and endured.He was rough and brash; used his power to get and take whatever he wanted. He used LeFou's kindness, but neither man mentioned that that was the case, and it wasn't that Gaston was ever unkind in return…He was tall, dark and handsome. He was both cunning and thoughtless simultaneously. He brought home women and still demanded LeFou’s time once they had left.Because he didn't want to open up to anyone. Not just anyone could know he was damaged. This was special to LeFou and LeFou alone, and he cherished it and didn't expect anything else out of life after the war.When it finally happened that Gaston asked to use his body for relief, LeFou consented without question.“Of course, Captain.”And so, this was added to their routine. A routine which without realizing it, had become more about habitual raw pleasure than therapy at all. .: :. Gaston bit into the soft dewy flesh of LeFou’s back, tightening his desperate grip around LeFou’s gut as he ground against him from behind.“Fuck--”LeFou was crushed, pinned so absolutely to the bedding that it was difficult to breathe, but still managing to push back against Gaston’s thrusts expertly. His hands balled themselves in sheets, wrapping and twisting until they were practically torn from the corners of the bed.Pillows were on the floor. Clothing was tossed haphazardly across furniture. The candlelight was dim, but it was there -- Gaston hadn’t taken him in the darkness of the early morning hours this time.It was a good night.The pace was picking up, too fast to be pleasant without masturbation, and LeFou grunted, swatting a hand behind him weakly to ask Gaston to let up. He did, just slightly enough to allow his partner to snake a hand downward and grasp himself, before continuing to chase his climax.Gaston dug the balls of his feet into the mattress and collapsed over the shorter man, holding himself up with one hand beside LeFou’s right ear as he bent down to breathe raggedly into the left.“You’re so good,” he whispered, raspy, exhausted, still fucking violently against LeFou as LeFou came, shouting “ahs” into the blankets beneath him. Gaston came then, too, stuttering his hips and growling like a feral beast. They stayed collapsed for too long a moment, catching their breaths - LeFou just barely - Gaston’s cock softening and slipping from the man trapped beneath him, dragging a trail of cum with it. Their bodies were tacky with sex, but neither man moved, opting instead to dry off in the cool spring breeze wafting through the window.Gaston kept his face buried in his partner’s head of curls, panting, sighing happily. Mumbling, “Tomorrow night, we can do whatever would make you happy.”“...Hm?”Now, LeFou was plenty satisfied that he was able to always be at Gaston’s side; sleep in Gaston’s bed. Without caring too much about returned feelings of love, being intimate with Gaston was what made him happy at his core. Still, Gaston was dispassionate about many things that didn’t involve himself, and his consideration was a welcome surprise.The barge of a man turned his back and curled in on himself, one arm keeping cool under the pillow. Shuffling the blankets back on top of them properly, LeFou draped himself across Gaston's bare arm and chuckled softly.“Are you really interested in that, Gaston?” he cooed. “Thank you.”“I'm nothing if not generous,” Gaston scoffed, but the vague humour in his voice was reassuring.“Are you really so bored that you’d leave something like this up to me?” He said, raising a brow.And it was a genuine question - was Gaston daring enough to truly do anything? LeFou didn’t have a fountain of sexual experience, but he did have...things . Things that during cold, lonely nights at war, were able to bring just a little bit of warmth to his face before drifting off to sleep - or that if he was lucky enough to find some privacy set him on fire. Things that he didn’t know if Gaston’s ego was capable of handling.“I know you won’t let me down,” Gaston yawned.LeFou dabbed the sweat from Gaston’s arm and back before laying beside him more comfortably to drift off to sleep, though sleep didn’t come easily. .: :. “Stay in your chair,” LeFou called from the bedroom corner opposite Gaston. He was dressing out of view but he could see his partner sitting casually with one ankle crossed over his knee. Tapping a finger against the arm of the chair, growing impatient.Gaston grumbled audibly and LeFou tsked. “Be patient!”When he removed himself from the dressing screen, LeFou wore tall burgundy stockings, fastened with a leather garter adorned with small golden clasps at his thighs. The colour of the stockings matched the chemise that flowed delicately around his wrists and gathered at the shoulders, complete with a black kerchief tied in a bow at his neck. The legs of his cotton knickers were pulled up to meet the hem of the stockings, and the whole outfit seemed to be much more revealing than it truly was.He wore his hair down, combed back nicely for the time being, and Gaston thought perhaps he'd also applied some dark makeup around his eyes, as they shone much more brilliantly than usual.He looked sweet and delicate and sexy, but Gaston laughed in spite of himself.“What on earth are you wearing? You look ridiculous.”LeFou pouted, “I absolutely do not!” he said defensively with his hands on his hips.“You look like a common whore.” He sneered but he didn't sound displeased.“And given your penchant for loose women, I'd think you'd appreciate it,” he said, still pouting, but rolling with it; keeping Gaston’s seemingly jovial mood in mind and feeling playful. “You don't want to tear my clothes off?”Gaston exhaled sharply through his nose, “Hm…” His feet fell to the floor and he moved to push himself up to his feet. “I want to tear you apart.”With eyes half-lidded and cheeks growing rosy, LeFou made his way over to the man before him just as he was about to stand. His stockinged foot pressed against Gaston’s abdomen with a firmness that warned the man to sit down. Of course, Gaston could have knocked LeFou to the floor, and for a moment a temper flared in his eyes and LeFou was sure that he was in for it.But nothing happened.Gaston sat, and LeFou bit his bottom lip in pleasure at his friend's obedience.“I like looking down at you for once. Will you stay sitting?”The man rolled his eyes and looked away. His perfect grin never leaving his perfect lips.“I am, aren't I?”“That's true in this moment,” LeFou said, softly - as smooth as butter - and quietly. “But please…”His eye contact with Gaston didn't waver until LeFou made his way to the back of the chair. One hand traced Gaston’s exposed collarbone as he moved, pulling the drawstring of Gaston’s tunic and dipping his hand inside the neckline to expose more skin and stroke soft fingers over the other man's chest hair.He removed his kerchief with his free hand and leaned closely from behind, just barely nestling his nose against Gaston’s elegantly-groomed locks.“I know you'll be able to break free,” he said, voice velvety and low, “but please restrain yourself.”Before Gaston could process the words and react, LeFou had his wrists in his hands and had begun to tie the kerchief tightly around them in a timber hitch.Gaston thrashed his arms about behind him. “What is the meaning of this?” His mouth agape with surprise. Few men had ever attempted to bind him, and when they had, it had been during war, and the results had not been pretty.But LeFou was immediately there, kneading his shoulders, kneading his ears; bending over the chair to reach and nuzzle his nose against the lobe of his ear.“Shh,” LeFou cooed, “Let me make you feel good.”Gaston shivered as LeFou’s breath hit him, and covered by wriggling some more in his seat. His brow remained furrowed and his face was reddening ever so slightly as the reflexive anger surged through his blood.“LeFou…”It was a warning, and LeFou recognized it absolutely. But still, he dared to answer teasingly, “Gaston…” suckling at the other man’s earlobe, breathing hotly against him. He kissed Gaston’s sideburns; darted his tongue out to lap a stripe along Gaston’s jawline. He relished the feeling of Gaston’s stubble against his lips and the taste of sweat.Gaston’s composure steeled and he smirked against LeFou’s mouth, tilting his head to be nose to nose with the puzzling creature before him.LeFou.Much more brazen than usual - perhaps a little more confident - and undeniably attractive.“You’re getting joy out of seeing me tied up.”LeFou hummed. “I want to know what makes the great Captain Gaston tick - that would make me happiest. Are you alright with indulging me?”LeFou stepped forward so that he was facing Gaston directly. He felt wrecked already as his eyes swept over Gaston’s perfectly-chiseled body - his feet, obediently placed firmly on the ground; the minor tenting in his slacks; his tunic already partially unbuttoned and his chest glimmering slightly from the sheen of sweat. It made him weak in the knees to see the man he loved disheveled because of him.And then he looked into Gaston’s darkened eyes, saw the smirk in them - the lust and challenge in them.“Of course.”And LeFou was all over him, straddling Gaston’s lap, pulling the remainder of the tunic’s fastening free as his mouth found his partner’s neck. He began by evening out his ministrations - sucking on Gaston’s other earlobe, kissing and nipping his way downward against his jaw, his chin. Gaston tilted his head back deliberately, allowing LeFou proper access to his neck.He was sloppy; licking at the man’s adam’s apple, dragging his tongue over the delicate veins, sucking lightly enough to leave no visible marks; kissing. Kissing everything, everywhere. Every bit of his neck was claimed by LeFou, whose fingers massaged small circles against the other’s clavicle as he left trails of saliva against salty skin.Gaston let out a soft sigh, and it set LeFou’s blood ablaze. His erection was much more noticeable against LeFou’s backside now, and it gave him a sense of urgency that he desperately tried to suppress.Take it slow.“LeFou…”Gaston sounded sweet and precious and LeFou nearly choked. He was used to hearing Gaston speak his name, but not often like this. Until recently, he was sure their lovemaking hadn’t held much of a deep meaning. Perhaps it still didn’t. But the way his name spilled from Gaston’s lips was sure intoxicating.“Gaston…” LeFou spoke breathlessly, just above a whisper, “you’re perfect.”His tunic was swept as far out of the way as possible, the flounce of his neckline dancing gently along his form as he breathed. LeFou laid his hands firmly against Gaston’s pecs, tracing a rhythm down them with his fingers, grazing his nipples, running them down his abdomen, stopped only by Gaston’s tanned leather belt.“You’re absolutely perfect,” he said louder now. “You captivated me since the first day I saw you.”Gaston chuckled, his lips curling into a cocky grin, “Tell me more.”Gaston softly grunted as LeFou shifted against him to dip his mouth back down to Gaston’s neck. “Mmph, there’s no one in town who compares...” he smiled against his friend’s slick skin. “You’re gorgeous…you’re strong…”LeFou pushed back against Gaston’s constrained cock, rocking painfully slowly against the man. He was hard himself, and the pressure between his groin and Gaston’s gut was making him lightheaded. He inhaled deeply against Gaston’s collarbone and dragged his teeth as far down as he could comfortably reach, seated like this. His tongue darted out to flick at Gaston’s left nipple, eliciting a soft hiss in response.“You’re so admirable, Gaston...you make men everywhere want to be you…” LeFou kissed up the man’s chest and along his leftmost shoulder, kneading his stomach, his sides. “…But – ah – who would dare to try..?”Gaston huffed, a pseudo growl that said he was growing impatient with lust.“Are you mine?” He growled.LeFou was consumed by the smell of him; the taste of him; his gravelly, commanding voice. He was sweaty and hot in the face, and he wondered how much more he could take of his own game as he moaned out an affirmative, “God, yes,” against Gaston’s heaving chest.Gaston thrust his hips upwards sharply, throwing LeFou of balance just slightly enough to have him clinging to the man’s large broad shoulders desperately.“Will you let me fill you?” Gaston rasped.LeFou was winded. He stared down at Gaston for a quick moment, his lips curling upwards into a devious toothy smile, dimple forming on his cheek. His half-lidded eyes flashed down at the man beneath him, who glared savagely back. A muscle above Gaston’s eye twitched.He was losing his composure already. Anxious to break his word to LeFou and take charge as always.It made LeFou’s pulse race.He bent slowly forward, leaning into Gaston’s ear, and the man in return turned his head into LeFou’s dark waves of hair. LeFou sucked once more at the man’s earlobe, licked over the shell of his ear and back.“No,” he whispered.He slid out of Gaston’s lap as the man began to thrash, nearly standing and taking the chair he was bound to with him.“LeFou,” he warned sharply, fists flexing open and closed behind him. “This has gone far enough.”“Shhh, mon cher, Capitaine…” LeFou soothed, holding his hands up in defense. He’d known this was bound to happen, but he did so often enjoy pushing Gaston. “I want you too…but you need to wait.”Gaston grimaced.“Have I not made you feel good so far?” LeFou teased. The curious smile on his face helping Gaston to calm down ever so slightly.He turned, then; his curls bouncing with him as he slunk out of Gaston’s proximity. He tore at the drawstring of his chemise to loosen it as he stepped out of view, disappearing once more behind the dressing screen.“What’s your goal, then?” Gaston shouted after him. “To drive me mad?”“Trust me, Captain.”“Don’t ‘Captain’ me,” Gaston growled. He was finding himself more curious than angry now, and attempted to adjust his tone accordingly so that LeFou wasn’t offended. “If you just knew what I wanted to do to you right now…”When LeFou returned, he carried a small polished wooden box and an equally small vial of lubricant. His open top revealed his bare chest, and his underdrawers were deliciously exposing his arousal. He knelt at Gaston’s feet, placing the curious objects on the floorboards beside him and draping himself over Gaston’s knees in an awkward but tender hug.“There are things I’ve wanted to do to you as well,” LeFou purred. He kissed Gaston’s knees, several times, before readjusting his position and spreading Gaston’s legs wide enough to sit directly between. “Do you trust me?”“I’m not sure…” Gaston furrowed his brow, looking suspiciously through narrow eyes at the man between his legs. “You have my curiosity, though.”LeFou pouted. “Hm, well. I’m sure you’ll enjoy this.”His fingers were stubby, but they were nimble and he made quick work of the buttons on Gaston’s slacks and knickers beneath. He released Gaston’s erection and the man hissed through clenched teeth in anticipation as it bobbed against his stomach.He watched as LeFou’s pillowy, pinkened lips found their way to the tip, tongue lolling out to lap at the underside. LeFou held his cock upright for better access to its entire length, licking again from the base to the head.Gaston stifled a grunt and laughed lowly. “You love it, don't you?”“I love everything about you."LeFou could feel Gaston’s cock twitch at that, a tiny quiver of muscles as Gaston grew even harder at each of LeFou’s touches. His fingers felt hot and sweaty under the pressure to perform, but still he gripped the other man's shaft and pumped, taking what he could into his mouth and sucking in tandem.“Hah--!” Gaston choked out. “G-good Lord…”LeFou’s smile widened against the man's skin, mouth full, removing his fingers from the man's cock slowly until he was able to take in the full length.“Mmph!”It was good.It felt incredible to take it all in, and when he made eye contact with Gaston it was more incredible still. Gaston was bright red - a sight he’d never before seen - eyebrows screwed tight in a helpless incline. He panted through his mouth, like a fish out of water, looking as though he was trying to speak.LeFou pressed his tongue firmly against the underside at a similar pace as his lips, flicking it around the tip and plunging back down into his throat. Running on instinct alone.“Your throat--” Gaston finally managed to gasp. “Keep it there.”LeFou complied once - twice - and then pulled away, bringing a string of sticky saliva with him.His hand gripped Gaston’s member once again and stroked lazily up and down. He allowed his thumb to rub against the slit, slicking the head of his cock with precum. Gaston shuddered in protest, thrusting shamelessly against LeFou's hand.“If you close your eyes, I'll give you more,” said LeFou. “You look amazing when you're like this.”Gaston stared defiantly for a second before huffing an exaggerated sigh and complying. He eyes closed and his face relaxed. If his hands hadn’t been bound, he would have leaned back onto them; the very picture of contentment“You’ll be the death of me, my friend.”LeFou was over the moon, and high on adrenaline and arousal. His own cock rubbed uncomfortably at the fly of his knickers, leaving a wet spot behind. He wondered if Gaston had noticed it; the obvious proof of how badly he wanted the man.But there was no use in dwelling on his own libido - he just had to make sure Gaston was game enough for what was to come.The lid was unscrewed from the vial of lubricant, and LeFou took a modest amount in his hand and began to coat Gaston’s twitching manhood with it. He twirled his tongue around the head as he did so, dipping into the slit, a cacophony of sharp inhales and gasps ringing out above him before he removed himself and slathered the tip with lubricant as well.LeFou opened the small box, next. It held a slick metal rod - small - no thicker than a quarter of an inch. It caught the candlelight nicely, and for a moment, LeFou just held it and admired it. He was close to reconsidering his actions.A quiver of Gaston’s hips snapped him to attention, and he dipped the rod into the vial and removed it once he was satisfied with the coverage of lube. Biting his bottom lip, stomach fluttering, he raised the tool to Gaston’s dripping cock. .: :. It was bittersweet, but LeFou was carefree these days. Paris was beautiful in the summertime. There was nowhere better to be, than stationed in the fashionable pulse of France. So bustling with people from so many walks of life.He spent this particular afternoon browsing the shops of le Marais. If he could, perhaps he would pick up a gift for Gaston. The man had been overworking himself with preparations for the oncoming war, and scarcely relaxed until LeFou scolded him and took him to a local tavern for ale and women.Chasing the thin cobblestreet wherever it took him, LeFou found himself drawn to a curiosity shoppe. The window was cluttered with animal pelts and skulls, costume jewelry, dolls and assorted knick-knacks. His small hometown of Villeneuve didn’t have any such sort of store, so if he were to find a gift for the man who had it all - this would be the place.It smelt of dust inside, the oak floorboards creaked, and it was certainly cluttered how LeFou had pictured such a place would be. But despite the age and condition of most of the items for sale, everything shone brilliantly, illuminated by the glorious sun of a glorious day that shone through the large front showcase window.A spotlight led LeFou to a collection of ancient-looking medical supplies. His uncle had been a doctor, and he’d always admired the position, though he didn’t have the brains for it himself.Several strange items had handwritten plaques beneath them with taglines such as, “Ask me about this!” and though LeFou couldn't read, he did recognise the word “ask.”He frowned. Most of the items were fairly self-explanatory. He'd hoped to see something unusual.Giving the display a final sweep, LeFou noticed something that shone even more than the other utensils in the case. Whereas many of the instruments looked antique, this looked brand new. It looked a bit like a large sewing needle, but with a dull tip and not nearly sharp enough to pierce fabric. He didn't understand its usage at all.“So?” he asked. “What does this do?”The shop owner was an older fellow with a prominently waxed white mustache. He moved about the shop excitedly towards LeFou, adjusting his monocle as he did.“Ahh, that--” he looked it over and clasped a hand on LeFou's shoulder. “That is a sounding instrument. Have you heard of it?”“No,” LeFou smiled politely, arching a brow with curiosity. “It makes music?”The shop owner chuckled, a throaty cackle that made LeFou laugh along nervously.“Yes, of sorts, I suppose.” The old man removed the small wooden box from the display case to take a look at it closer himself. “No, this is a medical sound, used primarily for medical procedures having to do with the urethra.”LeFou scrunched his nose. He didn’t understand.“Eccentrics,” continued the man, leaning closer to LeFou to speak more quietly, “use it for masturbatory pleasure.”LeFou’s eyes widened instantly, darting about to ensure no one was paying him or the shop owner any mind. He couldn’t be sure that he was blushing, but he definitely could feel the heat rising to his face. He didn’t know what to say, and felt blessed that the shop owner continued speaking for him, slapping him again on the back and cackling.“I know what you’re thinking,” laughed the man, “but if you’re interested, I won’t judge you.”Finally, LeFou regained composure enough to ask.“...How does it work?” .: :. LeFou held Gaston’s cock upright, massaging what he could with his pinky finger. He held the bulbous top of the sound firmly and tried to stabilise this shaking hand by letting the tip of the instrument slip against Gaston’s slit.“It’s cold - LeFou, what do you have?”In a panic, LeFou’s eyes darted upwards, but thankfully Gaston still had his eyes shut, though his forehead was wrinkled with discomfort.“Gaston.”It came out faint, breathless. His cheeks were hot. His dark hair was beginning to matte itself to LeFou’s face and neck.“Gaston-- I’ll stop. Tell me to stop, and I will.”Gaston’s chest wracked with deep breaths, but still, he grinned. “I’m a man of my word.”“Please…”His reply came in the form of a sharp exhale through his nose. “Continue.”LeFou did as he was instructed in the shop, all that time ago, and held the sound firmly, pushing it shallowly into the opening of Gaston’s member and releasing it just enough to allow gravity to take its course and sink it slightly deeper inside.“Hah--!” Gaston panted forcefully and fell forward as much as he could, with his hands still tied behind him. He howled and his eyes shot open. He stared down at LeFou, between his legs, and LeFou stared wide-eyed back at him; both mens’ eyes wet with unfallen tears of shock and worry.“D-don’t move too much,” LeFou whispered, “I don’t want to hurt you.”The man above him quaked in his seat, but didn’t move from the chair.“LeFou…”“Gaston…” LeFou stared, at a loss of what to do or how to move forward, so he did what he did best and spoke soothingly, massaging Gaston’s leg with his free hand. “You’re safe with me, I promise.”He leaned forward and pressed his lips to the base of Gaston’s cock.“I love you, I wouldn’t do anything to hurt you,” he calmed. “Tell me to stop.”Gaston traced his friend’s face over and over as his panting subsided. The sight of LeFou - all blush, running from his cheeks to the tips of his ears; red, runny nose - he absorbed every detail. His shining eyes; the gloss of precum on his lips; his soft, warm hands touching him as though he was a priceless jewel. The sight of LeFou between his legs, in womens’ stockings. His shirt thrown open and his cock straining and untouched while he pleasured Gaston alone.It was all too much, and Gaston felt breathless now for a whole other reason.“Don’t stop,” he commanded.LeFou swallowed thickly, never breaking eye contact with his lover as he followed instructions and let the rod slip farther into Gaston’s tip on its own accord.Gaston clenched his teeth and allowed it to happen, and never once said the word “stop.”They remained silent, save for their open-mouthed breaths, until the sound was in as far as it would go. LeFou licked his lips, admiring his handiwork. His right hand absently began to slip downwards to his knickers, but as soon as he made contact with his groin through the fabric, Gaston coughed and shook his head, and LeFou’s found himself unwilling to ignore his captain’s order.“What now,” Gaston said, voice small and strained. It was unusual to hear it like this, but LeFou soaked it in.“I pull it out,” he said.He tugged at the instrument's top gently, pulling it perhaps an inch. He moved slowly, and waited for Gaston’s breathing patterns to level out before letting it sink back in.“How is it?”“Strange,” replied Gaston in a cool baritone, “but do as you wish.”Again, LeFou pulled at the sound, and let it drop, and pulled at it again. He repeated the actions in quicker and quicker succession, and when he was confident enough in his ministrations of the tool to look away, LeFou bent forward to lap once more at the thick pulsing vein running along the underside of Gaston’s unbelievably rigid cock.“Fuck!”He dipped his head lower, lifting Gaston’s balls to lick the taint, then one by one took them into his mouth until he had Gaston gasping for breath above him and seeing starbursts behind his eyelids.“Christ--! LeFou--!” Gaston cursed. A string of profanities and half-finished words flew from him, each one music to LeFou's ears.He sounded absolutely beautiful, and it took LeFou's breath away to witness strong, proud Captain Gaston unravel before him; his usually-perfect hair now soaken against his forehead, beads of sweat running down his pecs and dripping from his chin.“I'm--!”A pool of thick white precum had begun to form around the sound, and LeFou's eyes fluttered half shut. His mouth felt so dry, gasping for air as he took in the sight.“Ngh--!”He had to unfasten his knickers, and he doubted that Gaston had the capacity to argue right now.Once free, he leaned closer against the man’s groin, Gaston's legs clenching intensely around him. He pumped himself in rough sloppy strokes with his left hand and removed the sound completely from Gaston with the right, and as he did so, Gaston came with a bestial grunt.Thick white stripes slashed across LeFou's face, and he opened his mouth wide to receive whatever he could on his tongue. He stroked Gaston until he was drained to completion, and came, too; face pressed into Gaston’s damp skin, panting and moaning helplessly against Gaston’s leg. Rocking into his own hand and soiling his socks and the throw rug beneath him.They were both a ragged mess, heaving deep satisfied breaths into the air. Lying sticky still against one another, LeFou mumbling, “You're perfect. So perfect,” and Gaston agreeing.LeFou's eyes had long since drifted closed, and for a moment he considered falling asleep just like this.But he felt hands running through his hair, moving down and kneading his shoulders with pressure enough to push him up off of Gaston.He looked up wearily, confused.“You..?”“I untied your knot.” Gaston grinned down at him, though he looked more exhausted than cocky. “Let's get up and move to the bed.”He swiped a finger over a line of cum across LeFou's nose and dipped the finger into his lover's mouth. LeFou suckled at it and closed his eyes again.“Okay,” he yawned. “Shall we clean ourselves first? I'm afraid we've made quite a mess of ourselves…”Gaston shook his head. “Leave it as a reminder of what I put up with.”He undressed quickly and stretched, arching his back and cracking his knuckles before plopping down on to the bed. LeFou wiped what mess he could with his chemise and removed his clothing as well. He fell forward, melting naked against Gaston and wrapped himself in a sheet. He was still too sweaty to get properly under the covers, but he didn't think it would matter much soon.“LeFou…” Gaston turned his head to face his friend, “For what it's worth, you're the best.”LeFou blushed and kissed Gaston’s shoulder, letting his eyes slip shut one final time for the evening.“Thank you, Captain. Bonne nuit.” .: :.
LeFou woke up bound and tied to the bedposts.
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10653261
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Interlude D1
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{
"Archive Warning": "No Archive Warnings Apply",
"Category": "M/M",
"Characters": "Ellen Harvelle, God, Mrs. God, Dean Winchester (as John Watson), Balthazar (as Bacchus Holmes), Castiel (as Sherlock Holmes)",
"Fandom": null,
"Language": "English",
"Rating": "General Audiences",
"author": "by Cerdic519",
"chapters": "3/3",
"completed": "2018-11-07",
"published": "2017-04-17T00:00:00",
"words": "965",
"Additional Tags": "Angst, Destiel - Freeform, Johnlock - Freeform, 221B Baker Street, Abandonment, Emotions, Bombs",
"Relationship": null,
"Character": null,
"Relationships": "God/Mrs. God, Castiel/Dean Winchester, Sherlock Holmes/John Watson",
"Series": "Elementary 221B",
"Collections": null,
"Fandoms": "Supernatural, Sherlock Holmes & Related Fandoms",
"Archive Warnings": null,
"Categories": null,
"Bookmarks": null,
"Chapters": null,
"Comments": null,
"Completed": null,
"Hits": null,
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"Published": null,
"Words": null,
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}
|
[Narration by Doctor John Watson, M.D.]
I stayed in Scotland until Friday at which time my brother was forcibly evicted from the hospital for complaining too much (a true Watson!). His burns had indeed been minor and were almost all gone, and it was with a happy heart that I again boarded the night sleeper looking forward to seeing London and Holmes again. We had exchanged telegrams during my absence and our things were to be moved that Friday from our respective houses to Baker Street.It was just before nine on Saturday morning that my cab rolled to a halt outside 221B and I got out. I was surprised to see that the curtains were still closed; perhaps my friend had not yet followed his belongings.I entered to find Mrs. Harvelle in the hallway and greeted her warmly. But her face was clearly worried and the way she looked at me only increased my sense of foreboding. “You have a visitor”, she said sounding strangely upset. “Mr. Holmes' brother.”“Which one?” I asked hoping it was not the obnoxious Bacchus. She made a face.“The oily one with the slappable face. Mr. Bacchus Holmes.”So much for that hope. I climbed the stairs wondering what the lounge-lizard wanted with us.
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Something was very wrong. Mr. Bacchus Holmes looked guilty.“Where is Holmes? I asked, looking round.“Gone”, he said not looking at me. I raised my eyebrows.“What do you mean, 'gone'?” I asked, puzzled.“He had to leave on pressing family business”, the fellow said.“When will he be back?” I asked.“We do not know.”I may have only been the whetstone on which the sharp tool that was Holmes kept itself true but I had dealt with enough patients to know evasion when I heard it. “You are hiding something!” I said accusingly. “This is to do with your father's visit and Holmes' reaction to it.”“Do not stick your nose in where it is not wanted, doctor!” he snapped.I glared at him. Mr. Bacchus Holmes seemed to soften a little.“Father has agreed to pay his rent here for the foreseeable future”, he said, “so you do not need to worry your pretty little head about that.”“I am worried about my friend, not money!” I snapped. “It may be unknown to the likes of you but it is some concept called friendship!”Mr. Bacchus Holmes stood up and crossed to the door before speaking.“Is it?” he asked, looking meaningfully at me before leaving.Damn her, Mrs. Musgrave had been right! I had lost someone important!I was so lost in my misery that I did not at first notice the small envelope propped up on the table. When I did and the fact that it was addressed to me, I was all fingers and thumbs trying to open it. Inside was a single piece of paper with three words written on it in Holmes' inimitable scrawl. 'Wait for me'.I sank to the floor by his chair and a tear welled up in my eye.....
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----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
Heaven
God was not afraid. Supreme Beings did not get afraid. They did however sometimes get cold and it was perfectly natural for the human form to vibrate somewhat in those circumstances.His wife glared at Him. Part of the Antarctic Ice Shelf fell off for no apparent reason, narrowly missing a surprised nearby survey ship. They were even more surprised when the resultant wave somehow divided and passed wither side of them.“How could you?” She stormed, banging the table and causing a minor earthquake centred on one of the western Aleutian Islands. “They were just working towards each other and now this?”“The hunter is not yet read to acknowledge his feelings”, God said defensively. His wife looked Seriously Annoyed and He silently hoped that it was not going to end in another repeat of the infamous Atlantis Incident, the last time all His carefully-laid historical plans had gone spectacularly belly-up. “Having the man he actually loves out of his life for a while will make him start to realize that.”She huffed and a freak storm flattened most of a forest in the Andes. God covertly put it up again.“How much of a 'while'?” She demanded.“Just three years, dearest”, He muttered. She rolled Her eyes.“Men!” She snapped. “All Emotional Constipation and Not Talking About Feelings! And my sweet little cutesy-wootsy looking so sad. This had better work!”“Yes dear!”He looked down far below to where a small ship was making its way across an ocean, and a scruffy figure was stood on the deck staring back at the retreating coastline with tears in his eyes. It was highly fortunate that Supreme Beings were not able to feel a complete heel over certain actions.So why in His name did He feel just that?
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----- CHAPTER BREAK -----
[Article from the 'Times' newspaper social pages]'A minor contretemps occurred earlier today when what we presume was an anarchist hurled a large stink-bomb at Sir Paul and Lady Bracklebury while they were walking along the southern side of Regent's Park. The attacker rode by in a trap and threw the device at the innocent couple, but by a stroke of great fortune Sir Paul swung at it with his walking-stick and successfully batted it in the opposite direction where it chanced to fly into a passing cab and promptly exploded. The occupant, a civil servant called Mr. Bacchus Holmes, had his entire suit ruined but as he is we understand not the pleasantest of personages this is a tragedy that we (and we suspect several other people) can live with. Even if there is the distinct and terrible possibility that his mother will make a story out of it.'
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10639167
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Xun Chang Qi
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{
"Archive Warning": "Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings",
"Category": "M/M",
"Characters": "叶修, 蓝河",
"Fandom": "全职高手 - 蝴蝶蓝 | Quánzhí Gāoshǒu - Húdié Lán",
"Language": "中文-普通话 國語",
"Rating": "General Audiences",
"author": "by yaori",
"chapters": "1/1",
"completed": "",
"published": "2017-04-16T00:00:00",
"words": "968",
"Additional Tags": null,
"Relationship": "叶蓝 - Relationship",
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"Archive Warnings": null,
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"Hits": null,
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"Published": null,
"Words": null,
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}
|
“小蓝你，是注册过的向导吧。” “是。” “你不好奇我为什么要逃出来吗？” “好奇，”蓝河笑，“但是，知道的越多，死的越快。还是不问比较好。” “要是我说，我做的事将波及所有哨兵和向导呢？” 涉及所有哨向……绝密级别的事情……是不是说，当年的任务，也能有个答案……蓝河迟疑，道：“让我想想。” “蓝河，我们到了。” “来了。”蓝河把门打开，让黄少天他们进来。 “哟！话唠和手残，好久不见了。你们俩果然没死。” “谁是手残！”黄少天瞪视叶修，“叶秋你个没下限的，离我们蓝河远点。” “我乐意。” “好了，少天。”喻文州拉住黄少天的手、看向叶修，“叶前辈，别来无恙？” “我这浑身是伤，可不是无恙。” “喻队，黄少，进屋谈吧。” “还是我们蓝河贴心。”黄少天走到蓝河身边，拍了拍蓝河的肩。 “你个已婚配的哨兵，离小蓝远点儿。” “嘿，你个未婚配的哨兵，才应该离蓝河远点。” 蓝河黑线，道：“你们先谈，我出去买点东西。” “小蓝……”叶修喊道。蓝河对上他的视线，有些无奈。明明是才见过一天的人，为什么能看懂他的眼神呢？ 莫笑不知是什么时候出现的。小奶猫咬住蓝河的裤腿，眼睛亮闪闪的。 “算了，东西什么时候都能买，我们进屋吧。”蓝河弯腰抱起小猫，把它放到春雪身旁。 四人进屋，围坐在外间的桌子旁。 “废话不多说，你们俩既然坐在这儿，应该知道我为什么逃出来吧？准备好蹚这趟浑水了？” “本就在浑水里。叶前辈是发现了什么秘密？” “没错。一直以来，联盟用来激发新生儿成为哨向的药剂都对人体无害。但激发率极低，只有0.2％的几率。近几年，新生儿夭折率增加，联盟却把这件事隐瞒起来。夭折率增加的原因，正是联盟研发的一种新药剂，激发率增高至1％，但对人体的副作用很大，严重的可能致死。” 卧槽……蓝河在心里暗道，震惊得说不出话来。 喻文州俩人虽然也在追查联盟的秘密，却不料是这样。 “联盟满三年就对哨向进行强制配对，早有许多人不满。然而这条写在《哨兵向导保护法》里，谁也没办法。长期的统治已经让联盟朽化，这法律，也是该变一变了。” “老叶，你打算怎么干？” “我已经和王大眼他们通过气，到时候控制媒体，把事情揭露出来。老冯也歇的够久了，咱们把他推上去，给他找点事儿干。” “老叶你可真是……老冯心脏病又该犯了。” “然后把有害药剂销毁，把法律改改。怎么样，简单吧。” “叶前辈说的简单，咱们没人没钱没装备，怎么跟联盟打。” “这不是有你们嘛，你们俩这一年在外面，可不只是开个书店吧。” “我和文州可是正正经经的生意人。”黄少天言词凿凿。 蓝河也知道黄少天和喻文州在开书店的同时与一些神秘的人有来往，见状，不由笑了出来。 “你看，连小蓝都不相信。”叶修得意。 小黄鸟跑了出来，站在黄少天肩上，全身的毛都炸了起来。喻文州顺了顺鸟毛，对叶修说：“光是这样可不够。我们要对抗的，是哨向组成的暴力机关。” “放心。到时候自然会里应外合。” “媒体呢？” “轮回负责。” “蓝雨……” “小卢被你们俩教得很好。我已经和他约定好了。”
|
10698108
|
Ever Since New York
|
{
"Archive Warning": "Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings",
"Category": null,
"Characters": "Zayn Malik, Harry Styles, Jeff Azoff, Gigi Hadid",
"Fandom": "One Direction (Band)",
"Language": "English",
"Rating": "Not Rated",
"author": "by flowersandcigars",
"chapters": "1/1",
"completed": "",
"published": "2017-04-23T00:00:00",
"words": "2,715",
"Additional Tags": "Some Fluff, Some angst, No smut sadly, also i hope this is canon lmao",
"Relationship": "Zayn Malik/Harry Styles",
"Character": null,
"Relationships": null,
"Series": null,
"Collections": null,
"Fandoms": null,
"Archive Warnings": null,
"Categories": null,
"Bookmarks": null,
"Chapters": null,
"Comments": null,
"Completed": null,
"Hits": null,
"Kudos": null,
"Published": null,
"Words": null,
"Updated": null
}
|
Zayn doesn't know what to do.He knows he doesn't always know what to do, and he accepts that. But now, he really doesn't know what to do. He has absolutely no fucking idea and he hates it.He's besides himself. He's been fidgeting on his bed - the one he shares with his girlfriend, for god's sake - thinking of this certain someone. Someone from his past he thought he'd never think of again, someone he knows and accepts will never talk to him again.But that someone is in the same city as him, for once, and the world just seems very small to him.God, this is suffocating.He needs air. Does he? He can't even think straight, so probably yes.He turns to his sleeping girlfriend. She looks so peaceful, curling beside him with her hands tucked under his pillow. He presses a light kiss on her forehead, and goes to scribble a note in case she wakes up while he's still gone.He does need that air, it seems like. -- New York is cold.That first hit of cold wind almost knocks him out. He's almost forgotten how cold it is, at 3 am in the morning. It does him good, though. He can never stand the heat. Unlike this someone, who loves it. If he didn't why would he stay in goddamn Los Angeles all the time while Zayn's bunkered up here, in the cold of New York?Zayn stops at his tracks. He's been wandering off mindlessly for a while, he realises he doesn't know where he is. Fuck. Where to go? What to do?Deep down, he knows what to do. It's probably his chance. It would be easy, he's just one call away and Zayn knows, he'd come if Zayn wants him to. He's too kind and polite to refuse.Then why's Zayn afraid to see him?That's an easy question, really. Because the last time Zayn saw him, he was in tears and that was the first time Zayn ever made him cry. Because the last time Zayn saw him, he asked him to leave and Zayn did.And Zayn wishes he hadn't left him, more than he wishes for anything else.Zayn looks down to his phone. He has his girlfriend on his homescreen, and most of the time, it makes him smile. This time it doesn't. He sighs, and he types his name, checking if he's actually here.According to the news, he is.Of course he is. So this is his chance.Zayn starts to type his number - who would've thought he'd still remember it after almost two years? - and fidgets on his feet while waiting for him to pick up.'Hello?''Harry?'Silence.Still silence.Still fucking silence.Zayn panics. He's not one to panic, but dammit, this time he panics.'Are you there?'Zayn can hear him take a sharp breath. He crosses his finger, waiting for that click sound of Harry hanging up. But it doesn't come. Instead, he hears a shuffle and a muffled voice.'Yeah, 'm here.''Are you in New York?' Zayn asks stupidly, knowing full well he is.'I am. You probably know that already, don't you?' Harry chuckles darkly.'Wanna go for a drink?''A drink?''Yeah... like a beer or summat. And talk. Like old times.''Zayn..' Harry sighs. 'You know I don't even drink beer.''Scotch then. Wine. Champagne. Coffee. Tea. I'll even drink that disgusting green juice you used to drink all the time.'Silence again.'Alright. Jeff knows a place... I'll text you the address.''Okay,' Zayn huffs out a relieved breath.'You sure you'll be there?' Harry asks, sarcasm dripping from his voice. 'Won't be the first time you don't show up when you're supposed to.'That stings. Zayn chooses to ignore it, because as much as he hates it, Harry was right.'I'll be there.'Click. -- Harry is besides himself.He absolutely didn’t expect Zayn to just call him up like that. It’s definitely not a secret that he’s in New York, the world knows that he is. Damn Zayn. Can’t he choose a better timing to fuck up his mind? Harry doesn’t need this from him, not now, so close to his first performance as a solo artist. Zayn, of all people, should know that.Apparently he doesn’t.So now Harry’s standing in front of the pub he and Jeff frequent, unsure. He texts Jeff, letting him know that he’s out and will be back in no time. That somehow makes him uneasy. Will thirty minutes be enough? Will he have enough time to recover and smile in time for his performance? Will he get through this? Why can’t Zayn choose a better time? He’s been here for three days, for god’s sake.God, what a twat.But that twat was a big part of Harry’s past, a big part of who he is now. Harry owes it to himself to just meet him and get over it. He’ll do it. At least he feels in control.Not like the last time he was with Zayn. He had cried and begged and pleaded and he had done everything to make Zayn stay. But he left anyway. Harry was mad, of course he was. He felt betrayed, and hurt, like his heart was ripped out of his chest. But he lived. He lived, he survived, and he can still remember it. He can still hear Zayn’s voice on his phone after Harry told him to leave.Harry hates to admit that it hurt him. It hurt him that Zayn left when Harry told him to.Those fucking voicemails.
'Harry, please, pick up the phone.'
'Harry. I need to talk to you.'
'Harry, I know you're mad. Just talk to me.'
'Harry...'
'You know what? I've tried. I really have. This is going to be the last message I will leave you. If you feel like talking, you know where I am.'
Harry didn't delete the voicemails. Not for a long time. His heart ached at the sound of Zayn's voice, pleading, because Zayn never pleads, but he did for him. Harry knew it in his heart, if he had heard Zayn saying his name, with that flicker of his long lashes, he would’ve taken him back in a heartbeat.
Harry didn’t want to take him back in a heartbeat.
So he waited and he waited and he waited until it was too late.
And then the phone stopped ringing.
Zayn’s gone.
And now he’s here, in the same city as him. -- To Zayn’s surprise, the pub Harry chooses is not some swanky place. It’s small and ordinary, like some pubs he saw in his hometown when he was a kid. Through the window, he can see Harry sitting on the bar, smiling and chatting with the bartender. Of course he is. The whole pub probably knows him and wants to die for him. Charming fucker. He always hates and loves him for it.Zayn has to come in at some point, right? Not just stress pacing and watching Harry smile and laugh from the window. He promised Harry he’ll come, so he’ll come. He owes Harry this. He knows that. So he takes a deep breath and pushes the piece of wood that separates him and the air Harry breathes.Harry notices him coming right away. Of course. It hurts when he sees Harry’s smile turn into a slight frown. It absolutely kills him, because Harry used to flash the brightest smile when he came into the room.It just dawns on him that they can probably never go back to the way it is.But that’s something to deal with later.‘Hi,’ Zayn props himself on the stool next to Harry. ‘What do you have?’‘Scotch,’ Harry gives him a rather sour smile. ‘Neat.’‘I’ll have what he has,’ Zayn tells the bartender, who nods and shuffles away.Silence.Before, with Harry, Zayn loved the silence between them. It’s rare for him to be comfortable sharing a silence with someone, and Harry was it for him. Someone he could share comfortable silence with. Before, Harry would prop his head on Zayn’s lap, reading books Zayn never quite understood, while Zayn’s humming to whatever tune was stuck on his head that time. And they would stay that way for hours and hours and hours.It’s only been five minutes and Harry already breaks their silence.‘Do you mind?’ Harry’s hardened voice makes Zayn turn his head.‘Huh?’ Zayn frowns.‘You may have all night, but I don’t. I have to get back to my hotel in thirty minutes,’ Harry explains himself, with a tiny bit of impatience in his voice.‘Alright…’ Zayn huffs. ‘Hear me out, will you?’‘Well, I’m here,’ Harry says with mock politeness.‘I’m sorry.’‘For leaving?’ Harry snorts. ‘Your solo album says hi.’‘No,’ Zayn flicks a glance to the drink the bartender just set down. ‘I can’t be sorry for leaving, Harry. I had to do that.’‘Don’t you think I knew that?’ Harry asks quietly. ‘Don’t you think I knew you enough to know that?’‘Harry…’‘You don’t get to do this,’ Harry turns his head away. ‘You don’t get to do me like this.’‘Do what? I’m trying to apologise here.’‘You’re trying to ease your guilt!’ Harry snaps. ‘There’s a difference. You don’t get to do that. You don’t get to fucking hurt me to hell and back and leave and apologise just because it will put your fucking mind at rest.’‘I can’t be sorry for leaving. I meant that,’ Zayn pauses. ‘But I can be sorry for the way I did it.’‘It’s been two years. I’m over it. I’m over you,’ Harry downs his drink and Zayn hates it, he really does, when Harry does it. Harry never downs his drink. He sips it, trying to get the taste on his tongue and cherish it. He never drinks to get drunk. And when he does, it’s because he needs to get drunk.Zayn knows this.‘Are you done?’ Harry nearly slams his glass to the bar.‘No. Stay a minute.’‘Alright. Clock’s ticking.’‘Do you remember our first fight?’ Zayn mutters the question softly.‘No,’ Harry retorts stubbornly.‘Well, I do. I was in your bed, and you were talking about how you used to go bird watching with your dad, back in your hometown. And you missed it, you missed your dad and you missed the luxury of being able to call him to go bird watching anytime… and I fell asleep. You were so mad. It was a vulnerable moment for you, but I fell asleep. Remember?’‘Maybe..,’ Harry’s voice softened, shrugging.He remembers that little scene like it just happened yesterday.
'Harry, please come out.'
'....'
'Harry please just talk to me. Don't be a child.'
'A child?' Harry hissed, fuming. He'd show Zayn a child. He wanted a child, he'd get one. So Harry kept his back on the door, to prevent Zayn from coming in.
'Don't lock me out...' Zayn muttered quietly, his forehead leaning against the door.
'Harry...'
'Come on. I'll make you a cuppa. How you like it, with milk and no sugar even though it's disgusting.'
'Okay, it's not disgusting. Talk to me. Please.'
'Harry... I'm sorry. I shouldn't have fallen asleep when you were talking about important things.'
Harry jerked his door open abruptly, sending Zayn forward. Zayn tried to play it cool, standing straight but his foot was fidgeting and Harry noticed.
'Did you mean it?'
'Mean what?'
'Did you really think my "rambles",' Harry makes air quotes sarcastically, 'is important?'
'Yes. Because you're important to me. I thought you knew that. I'm sorry.'
'Okay.'
'Hug it out?' Zayn spread his arms open, a pitiful grin forming.
Harry rolled his eyes, but he let Zayn wrap him anyway. It was awkward, because Harry is taller than him, but strangely, Harry was snug in his arms. Harry sighed while Zayn stroked him lightly on the back. Like he was both trying to get comfort and giving it.
'You're important to me too,' Harry mumbled against Zayn's temple.
'I know.'
‘You kicked me out of your room, and locked it. You never locked it. I was banging on your door, asking, begging you to come out and talk to me. You know I’m not a begging person, right? But I did that time,’ Zayn rambles on. ‘Like I do now.’‘Do you remember?’ Zayn asks again.‘I can’t believe you remembered that,’ Harry shakes his head.‘Of course I do. I told you... I told you you were important to me. Do you think I was lying?’‘I..,’ Harry stammers. ‘I don’t know what to think.’‘Look, I loved you, you know that? I still do. I wasn’t kidding, I wasn’t just saying it when I said you were my rock. It fucking hurt, goddamn it, it fucking hurt when I had to leave you. When I had to leave you to deal with my mess. I tried to stay away for a bit because I thought you needed a space from me, and for some selfish reasons I didn’t want you to see what a fucking mess I was…’ Zayn trails off. ‘It was a mistake.’Harry stares at him, eyes wide, mouth parted. He gulps audibly, and casts his eyes down.‘It was,’ Harry mumbles, his voice a touch of whisper. ‘It really was a mistake.’Zayn doesn’t know what to say, so he just lets Harry hang onto the silence. Harry plays with his rings, a nervous gesture Zayn has come to know well.‘I’m not asking you to take me back like it’s nothing. I just want..,’ Zayn huffs. ‘Something.’‘I’m not asking for happiness,’ Harry murmurs, ‘Just a little less pain.’‘Bukowski,’ Zayn smiles a little. ‘You said that a lifetime ago.’Harry huffs out a breath.‘I didn’t blame you,’ Harry says slowly, quietly. ‘It just hurt that you didn’t trust me enough with your demons. I thought you trusted me. I thought you would let me help. I thought you would let me fix it. I might not have succeeded, but we’ll never know now, will we?’‘No,’ Zayn shakes his head. ‘We won’t.’Harry’s green eyes meet Zayn’s gold ones. A tiny bit of smile hovers on Harry’s lips, but at the same time tears clouds his eyes. It makes Zayn tears up at the sight of it, knowing well he is, once again, the cause of those tears. If only he can turn back time… But he can’t.‘Harry, look, I’m…’ Zayn starts.‘I loved you too.’It takes Zayn by surprise. Misty eyed, Harry reaches to squeeze Zayn's hand. Zayn knows this is the closest he can get to forgiveness, the closest he can get to what used to be his reality - their reality .So he takes it.'Thank you.' -- ‘Stop being such a twat from now on, okay?’ Harry slides a bill on the table.‘Good luck for tomorrow,’ Zayn pauses. ‘I like your song.’‘I like yours too, thank you,’ Harry returns the compliment with sincerity.‘No you don’t,’ Zayn chuckles.Harry shrugs and grins. Zayn notices the grin doesn’t even reach his sad, green eyes, and he hates himself for it.‘I’m sorry for everything…’ Harry trails off. ‘I gotta go.’‘Okay.’‘Okay.’Harry squeezes Zayn’s arm lightly and plants his lips delicately to Zayn’s scratchy face.Zayn hesitates, but then decides to take his chance and wraps Harry in his arms. For old times’ sake, and because it’s what they do. Or used to do anyway. He lets out a relieved breath when Harry doesn’t pull away and buries his face in Zayn’s shoulder instead.‘Don’t be too hard on yourself,’ he whispers to Zayn’s ear. He pulls back, smiling, this time his smile reaches his eyes. ‘Alright?’‘Alright.’‘See you… somehow.’‘Enjoy New York.’‘I will.’And with that, Harry’s gone. Zayn can still feel the heat of Harry’s body against his chest, the warmth of his lips on his cheekbones. He will have to cling on to that for the rest of his life for the slightest proof of Harry’s heart.And that’s okay.He’s okay.
|
10608681
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must love dogs
|
{
"Archive Warning": "Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings",
"Category": "F/M",
"Characters": "Jon Snow, Sansa Stark, Samwell Tarly, Gilly (ASoIaF), Ghost (ASoIaF)",
"Fandom": null,
"Language": "English",
"Rating": "General Audiences",
"author": "by orphan_account",
"chapters": "1/1",
"completed": "",
"published": "2017-04-12T00:00:00",
"words": "1,463",
"Additional Tags": "Tumblr Prompt, i am jonsa trash & proud of it, Ridiculous amount of fluff, there is a slight mention of previous domestic violence, also references to puppacinos, & that isn't the only fluff that happens here",
"Relationship": null,
"Character": null,
"Relationships": "Jon Snow/Sansa Stark, Jon Snow & Sansa Stark",
"Series": null,
"Collections": null,
"Fandoms": "Game of Thrones (TV), A Song of Ice and Fire & Related Fandoms",
"Archive Warnings": null,
"Categories": null,
"Bookmarks": null,
"Chapters": null,
"Comments": null,
"Completed": null,
"Hits": null,
"Kudos": null,
"Published": null,
"Words": null,
"Updated": null
}
|
SAM: Remember that stunning red head who is watching your dog and you are not so secretly in love with?JON: Are you talking about Sansa?JON: Also, I am not secretly in love with her. I’m not in love with her at all.SAM: Denial isn’t just a river in Egypt my friend. Remind me what your current phone background is?JON: MY BACKGROUND IS FROM WHEN SHE TOOK GHOST TO GET ONE OF THOSE PUPPACINOS THAT DOESN’T MEAN I AM IN LOVE.SAM: He doth protest too much.
Jon tossed his phone onto his bed and pointedly ignored the second chime. He didn’t want to read whatever nonsense Sam had decided to send him. Sam wasn’t the only one who gave him a hard time about being in love with Sansa either.Sometimes Jon felt like he was talking to a brick wall when various friends would make comments about their love. They hadn’t been close growing up, but their relationship had changed when he took on his RA role at the university. Originally Robb was supposed to watch Ghost, but he had decided to follow a girl and transfer to Riverlands University. He knew from Robb that Sansa had just come out of an awful relationship when she quietly offered to watch Ghost.Jon had been unsure, but he was left with little to no options. He didn’t regret it now because he got daily updates of Ghost. Sansa made sure to spoil Ghost. He had never had so many photos or videos of his dog before.Through their connection with Ghost they had tentatively branched out and talked about other things. Their talks had soon morphed into study sessions at the library and getting coffee from the quad. He could admit that he enjoyed spending time with her.With the shift in their relationship his meddling RA friends had decided that he was in love with Sansa. Each of them made it their mission to remind him every day that he was in love with her. They would remind him about how well she took care of Ghost. At one point Sam told him to propose to her because no one was more perfect for him than Sansa.Even if he admitted he was in love with Sansa it wouldn’t matter. He could never tell her especially after everything Joffrey had done to her. If he admitted to his friends that they would try and give him some sort of pep talk he didn’t need or want.His thoughts were broken when his phone chimed again and there was soft knocking at his door.He threw open his door and was shocked to see Sansa standing there with Ghost.“What are you doing here San? How’d you get Ghost up here?” Jon asked because he knew there was no way Sam would let Sansa sneak Ghost up to his dorm despite how much he wanted them to date.“Didn’t you get my text about my surprise?” Sansa looked a little disappointed in his confusion. Ghost seemed to pick up on how tense Sansa was and nudged into her side. Jon felt his heart leap up to his throat at the smile Sansa was giving his dog.“I’m sorry I wasn’t really reading my texts” Jon apologized and moved so that both Ghost and Sansa could fully come into his dorm room.“Oh, that makes sense. I wasn’t interrupting anything, right?” Sansa asked as she sat on his bed. Ghost stuck close to Sansa, but he could see the dogs tail wagging exuberantly.“Not really, but even if I was I am much more curious how you managed to sneak Ghost into here? Not even Robb could pull that off” Jon asked. Though, if he were being honest he was grateful that she had Ghost there distracting him because he could focus on that instead of the way her blue sundress seemed to accentuate her curves and showcase her long legs.“Well remember how we discussed that I don’t like leaving Ghost at home” Sansa paused she scratch Ghost’s ears, “I guess after the incident with Joffrey my therapist suggested a service animal to help with my anxiety and panic attacks. I know Ghost is your dog, but the vet said he was the perfect candidate to get certified.”Jon hated the hesitation on Sansa’s face. He hated even more how she summed up the terror she survived with Joffrey as just some incident. More than ever Jon wished he could see the Lannister and make him pay for what he had done to the sweetest girl ever.“Now that he is certified anytime you want to see him I can get a visitor pass and bring him up and I know after your RA position is up you will take Ghost back. I didn’t certify him to keep him from you.” She looked terrified as the words came out of her mouth. “Oh, god please don’t think I’m trying to take him from you. That wasn’t my intention, I just fell in love with him. He’s a lot like you.”Ghost seemed to hone in on Sansa’s anxiety and placed his head fully in her lap and licked her hands. In that moment, Jon, could hear the speeches Gilly and Sam usually gave about the type of person he would fall in love with. They teased whoever could win the affection and loyalty of his dog would surely find their way into his heart. This was so much more than that.There wasn’t much thought when he surged forward and kissed her. It was sloppy and more than once their teeth clacked against each other. Despite the sloppy nature of the kiss Jon was sure he had never felt more from any kiss. There was just a feeling that something right, that something wonderful, was just beginning.Looking at Sansa’s dazed face he knew he would have to say something, but her swollen lips were distracting him. For a moment, it looked like Sansa might apologize to him with a hoarse whisper he told her “Don’t. Don’t you dare apologize to me. If you don’t want to kiss or go any further that’s okay, but never apologize to me for that kiss or for taking care of Ghost.”“And if I want to go further?” Sansa shyly asked.“Gods just marry me now then” Jon told her before kissing her again. This was slower and less sloppy than their first kiss. He could run his hands through her hair and feel her grabbing his shoulders and pulling him closer. She made a soft moan when his hands softly tugged on her hair.As much as Jon wanted to make her repeat the noise again and again, but Ghost wasn’t having any of it. He barked at Jon and Sansa couldn’t help the laugh that escaped her in that moment.“Do you still want to marry me when I have such a fierce protector?” Sansa smiled as she gestured to Ghost who looked content once he knew Sansa was all right and happy.“You deserve the fiercest protectors. But I suppose I owe Gilly and Same some kind of thank you gift” Jon told her honestly.“Thank you gifts? Why” Sansa seemed genuinely puzzled at the statement.“Because they’ve been telling me to tell you I how much I love you. And they were right that the girl I would fall in love would be the girl that won the affection and loyalty of Ghost” Jon told her quietly.Kissing her was different than admitting he was in love with her, but he felt better once the words were out. He never wanted to take them back either.“So, you’re telling me all it takes are puppacinos to win your love? Who knew Jon Snow was so easy?” Sansa teased. Jon couldn’t help the snort that came out when Ghost perked up at puppacino.“You know it was more than that” Jon held her gaze. He wanted, no he needed Sansa to see that she was more than that. That truthfully they had been treading towards this for a while.“I know and I think I am in love with you too” Sansa confided quietly.Jon kissed her again and this time Ghost chose not to interrupt. He just hopped onto the bed and wagged his tail endlessly as he watched.
SAM: Gilly said she saw Sansa & you holding hands as you got your beast one of those silly dog drinks from the café.JON: I’m surprised she missed the kissing.SAM: I KNEW YOU TWO WERE A PERFECT MATCH.SAM: Also, Gilly and I found a tie the same shade as Sansa’s eyes. We’ll save that for your wedding.
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10603035
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Beyond the Surface
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{
"Archive Warning": "No Archive Warnings Apply",
"Category": "F/M",
"Characters": "Sans (Undertale), Papyrus (Undertale), Undyne (Undertale), Reader",
"Fandom": "Undertale (Video Game)",
"Language": "English",
"Rating": "General Audiences",
"author": "by mapleleavesatnight",
"chapters": "1/1",
"completed": "",
"published": "2017-04-12T00:00:00",
"words": "1,288",
"Additional Tags": "Fluff, major fluff",
"Relationship": "Sans (Undertale)/Reader",
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}
|
“You said this will be the first time you’ll see stars?” I asked the grinning skeleton, clenching on the straps of my lightweight backpack. He gazed away from the trees covered in orange leaves, soon meeting my eyes… if that was even possible, when all I could see are empty eye sockets. The permanent grin on his face seemed genuine, full of integrity, much like the Sans I’ve known since even before the monsters were released from the Underground. He nodded once, turning his head to look down at the trail we walked on.“yep. don’t act like it’s not your first time either,” he spoke in his usual monotone voice, “if humans hadn’t feared us, you wouldn’t have had to called off work for me.” Scoffing quietly, I wrapped an arm around the shorter skeleton’s shoulders, pulling him close.“Don’t worry Sans, I would’ve called off even if it was to laze around at your apartment.” His words were true though. Before we both were even born, the humans and the monsters were at war with each other. The humans had feared the monsters’ magic, and banished them to live in the Underground while they took the surface. Now, Frisk, the monster ambassador, had broken the seal, and monsters were free to roam the world. But, it came with a lot of hardships. We were discriminated by the humans, attacked, murdered, they crippled our population. It was a gruesome thing that took most of us years to overcome. But, Sans and I had easily ignored them due to Papyrus’ excited behavior. In fact, he was the one who suggested we should go to the top of Mount Ebott and see the stars, like he and Undyne had did when they first reached the surface. From our time together in the Underground, I knew Sans always wanted to see the stars, and he knew I wanted to as well. The only access we had to it was the glowing rocks that rested atop the ceiling of the Waterfalls. We craved it, more like, and Frisk has helped us achieve just that. If they hadn’t fell, I’m sure we wouldn’t be walking to the mountain today.“Besides, Paps did say he’d drag you up here himself if you didn’t go.” Hearing him chuckle at my statement, I tilted my head to look down at him.“he was pretty close to it when he realized i had fallen asleep during our conversation.” Shaking my head at his words, I grasped his cold, bone hand, and started to trek up the grassy hill. “Come on, lazybones,” I joked, feeling him actually walk up the hill, instead of letting me do all the work, which was unlike him. “i’m comin’, shorty.” He said from behind, the dirt crunching under our shoes… well, his slippers, the skeleton always had those on. It took a few minutes for us to reach the top, but, we made it, and I slid the (f/c) bag off my shoulders. It wasn’t exactly night yet, so I had gotten out the black and gray blanket we packed, along with the telescope to set up when we felt like it. When it was laid out, we both sat on the soft fabric, laying on our backs and enjoying the chilling wind that flowed through the mountain top. Since he’s a skeleton and I’m a (monster of your choice), we both didn’t feel the cold wind, only the air that flew fallen leaves around. Though, it did feel nice to be out of work and with Sans, waiting for something we’ve always wanted to see. You’d think we would’ve already seen the stars, given at how long we’ve been on the surface. But, I have a night shift at a bar–they don’t let me carry the angry drunks out since I am a monster, and Sans would either be sleeping, trying to sleep, or reading Papyrus a bedtime story. The skeleton brothers live in a basement apartment, something they could live in without disturbing the humans above them. Sighing gently, I entwined my fingers, resting them on my stomach. “what’re ya thinkin’ about?” He asked, putting an arm under his skull and crossing one leg over the other. Turning my head to look at him, I was met with a look that knew all too well about what I was thinking about. Smiling, I shuffled closer to him, laying my head upon his shoulder and hearing his soul beat through his ribs. “How we’re this close to finally seeing the one thing we’ve always wanted, how it took us this long to find the human who would finally set us free,” He sighed softly at my words, boney fingers then laid against my back, rubbing it through the (f/c) hoodie I wore. “The closest thing we had to the surface was the snow, the hot temperatures, and the waterfalls. No sky, no stars, not enough space, the humans had the wonders of the outside world, while we had the cooped up Underground that we soon grew tired of.” Pulling on one of the strings of his hoodie, I pursed my lips, letting my clouded judgement of the humans stay rooted in the front of my mind. “well, we’re here now, hopefully forever, so don’t look so down, kid.” Rolling my eyes at the name, I got my phone out, checking the time. 8:41, the stars should be coming out now. “Any minute now.” I said with a smile, feeling his fingers clench a fistful of my hoodie. As he did though, the sun disappeared over the horizon, and the sky had become a dark purple. With it, came the twinkling orbs, some closer than the others, that spread wide across the sky. Gasping softly, I pushed myself into a sitting position, noticing the skeleton doing the same, except he stood, while I then kneeled. “These… these are…?” Expecting him to finish the question, I raised an eyebrow as quiet chuckling filled the air. Turning to look at Sans, I quickly noticed the way he was covering his face with his hands. His shoulders shook, along with the rest of his body, was he… crying? “Sans?” I stood, turning him to look at me, but, I jumped in fright once I felt his arms around my waist. His round and chubby skull buried in my stomach. From the way my shirt seemed to get soaked upon impact, he was indeed crying, from what, I couldn’t tell at the time. So, I wrapped my arms around the sobbing skeleton, holding him close as I looked up to gaze at the stars once more.“it’s…” His voice cracked, incoherent words falling out of his grinning mouth along with it. “the stars… they’re…” His hold tightened around me, head turning until the left side of his face rested against my stomach. “wow…” His voice was full of wonder, nothing like the usual monotone voice I’m used to, the one his brother is probably used to as well. “They’re beautiful.” I found myself whispering, bringing a hand up to clear my eyes of the tears that threatened to spill. Though, that didn’t stop them, and soon, I was holding Sans just as close as I sobbed happily. Reaching the surface had its perks, that’s for sure. A new life, full of wonders, new people, and certainly new sights to see. I’m sure witnessing the stars first hand wouldn’t be the same if Sans wasn’t here to see them with me. The both of us whom are crying with pure happiness to see something we’ve read about in the books the library smuggled from above. It was worth seeing Sans so happy.
|
10645266
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5 Times Harry Tried to
|
{
"Archive Warning": "No Archive Warnings Apply",
"Category": "M/M",
"Characters": "Draco Malfoy, Harry Potter, Ron Weasley, Hermione Granger, Pansy Parkinson, Blaise Zabini, Molly Weasley",
"Fandom": "Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling",
"Language": "English",
"Rating": "Mature",
"author": "by alienlover13",
"chapters": "1/1",
"completed": "",
"published": "2017-05-05T00:00:00",
"words": "6,014",
"Additional Tags": "Getting Together, Light Angst, Anxiety, Marriage Proposal, Domestic Fluff, Switching, 5 Times, 5+1 Things, Bisexual Harry, Post-Hogwarts, Post-War, HP: EWE, Falling In Love, Slow Burn, Romance, Hurt/Comfort",
"Relationship": "Draco Malfoy/Harry Potter",
"Character": null,
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"Collections": "H/D Remix 2017",
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}
|
It took them a long time to get together, but Draco didn’t regret any of the moments leading up to their relationship, even the unhappy ones. He spent half his life waiting for Potter, it seemed; what was a few more years, give or take? He’d never expected Potter to actually give him his wand back, or to offer his hand in an act of compassion that drew Draco right back to when Potter denied him at eleven years old. But fresh starts didn’t happen often, and Draco needed to take advantage of it.
He decided to return to Hogwarts over the summer and help Potter rebuild. It would have looked desperate to come all by himself, so Draco dragged Pansy and Blake with him. Potter had a right to be pissed off by Pansy’s presence at Hogwarts—she had tried to hand him over to the Dark Lord, after all—but instead of getting caught up in the small details, Potter did his best to put the past behind him. He would come sit with Draco out on the Hogwarts grounds, sharing whatever random story came to mind, be it about the Giant Squid, Quidditch, or even Draco himself. For his part, Draco started to loosen up a little after the first few times they met outside. Eventually, he felt comfortable enough around Potter to treat him to some of his most biting witticisms. Luckily, Potter seemed to enjoy his snarkiness, laugh lines deepening as he grinned at Draco with appreciation.
When their tasks were done and they left Hogwarts later that summer, they parted as friends. It was so much less than Draco wanted, but so much more than he ever thought he’d have. Potter was his friend now, and Draco kept that knowledge close to his heart. He could die happy knowing that Harry Potter no longer hated him.
Somehow, even though Draco hated pubs, Pansy and Blaise managed to drag him out on Friday nights to sate their need for spirits, greasy food, and dirty dancing. The only reason he allowed them to manhandle him into going was because the first-year Auror recruits had their weekly pub night then and it was a low-stakes chance for Draco to see Potter. He grew more and more comfortable around the Saviour, which became especially clear when he started ragging on Potter himself. Draco could have gotten drunk of of Potter’s influence alone, but he still drank up when Potter brought him cup after cup of shitty ale. At least that way, when they stumbled down the street, latched together in an effort not to end up on the dirty ground, Draco could blame it on being thoroughly intoxicated. He used the same excuse to allow himself to get slightly more handsy with Potter; and sometimes, it seemed like Potter did too. To Draco’s eternal disappointment, nothing ever came from these encounters.
Potter’s revelation that he was bisexual caused the small tendril of hope that had long survived in Draco’s stomach to blossom into a full-out monster. Now, the possibility of Potter wanting him back was real. This feeling quickly died when Potter started dating every blonde-haired baboon in sight. They all resembled Draco in some way, which only hurt more when he realized that Potter wanted someone who looked like him, yet still wasn’t him.
Michael Baddock. Even the very name of Potter’s latest fling made Draco want to put his fist through a window, and that was saying something because he greatly disliked pain of any kind. If it was anyone else, he’d have thought they were flaunting their arm candy to make Draco jealous, but he honestly thought Potter was too dimwitted to realize that Draco had a major thing for him. Still, though, Potter expected everything to be like normal, even with fuck-boy Baddock there, and Draco was unwilling to accommodate him. No, Potter, you’re not going to fuck me with your eyes and then go home and actually fuck Baddock. Draco had to stop himself from hexing the idiot after Potter decided to tongue his boyfriend when sitting right next to Draco, contenting himself with shoving Blaise into his chair where he could be the one to hear the awful slobbery noises that their tongues made.
So apparently Baddock was jealous of him. Asshole deserved every last bit of insecurity he was riddled with, because if he was threatened by a former Death Eater and Potter’s greatest rival, save for Voldemort, then Baddock would never be able to command Potter’s attention properly. Draco was happy when Baddock realized this a short number of months later, but he was less thrilled when Potter took that as an excuse to bitch and moan about having been dumped. Potter was single again—it would have been easy to seduce him and draw him into another relationship, but Draco was no-one’s rebound, least of all the man he’d been in love with since he was eleven years old.
For that reason, Draco took Potter to the club so he could pull strangers. He watched Potter salivate over the other patrons, driven mad with lust, and sighed. There was no way he was going to let any of these flea-bitten mangy dogs fuck him and take his virginity, but Potter didn’t need to know that. Draco approached one of the cleaner-looking dark-haired wizards and tried to throw off “fuck me” vibes as successfully as he could. Unfortunately, it worked, so Draco was forced to endure ten minutes of being groped on the dance floor before he dragged the man off into the back hallway. One quick Obliviate later, the man thought Draco was a sex god, and he was free to go home to his flat. Before he left, Draco took another look out on the dance floor. Potter had commanded the attention of a blonde wizard and was attempting to fuck him on the dance floor. He sighed again before leaving for home, immersing himself in romantic erotica for the rest of the night to dull the hollow feeling inside his chest.
***
Christmas came closer and closer, and Draco agonized about his gift for Harry. In the end, he need not have worried—Potter loved the soft green sweater he’d received and pulled it on immediately, treating Draco to a rare sight of his well-developed abs. Potter’s present to him, however, a first-edition book of magical theory by non other than his idol, Judith Eagleton, left Draco breathless. He had no idea that Potter actually knew him so well; he’d always gotten the slightest impression that Potter only heard him talk but never listened. This was one occasion Draco was more than happy to be proven wrong.
Their get-togethers started to increase far beyond the usual pub night, much to Draco’s elation and dismay. They’d either find themselves at his flat or at Potter’s, some kind of unhealthy takeout in hand. Potter would fall asleep over his Auror paperwork (Draco took a small amount of satisfaction in chastising Potter over his handwriting and then watching as he tried to make his chicken-scratch more legible) and Draco would cover him where he lay, shaking from the amount of effort it took to restrain himself from snuggling up in Potter’s arms.
They also had a morning routine of drinking coffee and splitting the newspaper. Draco would always keep the gossip section for himself, stealthily hidden behind the finance pages, and leave the Quidditch section out for Potter. Sometimes, when Potter would wake up and come to the kitchen smiling (no matter whether it was his or Draco’s, he always looked the same way), meeting Draco’s eyes with what he could only dare to describe as some kind of loving affection.
He’d set Potter up with a cup of hazelnut Tibetan coffee today, a real treat for both of them, when Potter asked to hear the latest on the college-professor-polygamy-scandal.
“What’s that, Potter? You wanted to hear what’s new in stocks and bonds?”
“Come on, Malfoy. Don’t be coy with me. I know you have the gossip pages hidden beyond that finance rag.”
“You'll be glad to know, Potter, that Weasley’s Wizarding Wheezes is up three points from yesterday—”
“Malfoy.”
“Alright, alright. She sent out an open letter to the campus community and notified the University President herself of her two husbands before accepting the tenure track job, and has yet to receive any major backlash. I can’t decide if she’s a dumb bint for making a big deal out of the situation or a genius for owning up to her preferences.”
“Marry me.”
Where the fuck did that come from? Potter was sitting across from him with a sappy-arse grin on his face, looking like Draco was the greatest thing since sliced bread. What was he on, anyway? They might be acting like a married couple (sans sex, of course) but that didn’t give him the right to utterly tease Draco like this and make him wish for things that could never actualize.
There was only one way to react to this situation.
“You’ve right lost your mind this time, Potter,” Draco sneered, chucking his paper into the bin and fleeing the room like the coward he was. Seconds later, he was dressed and ready for work. Potter’s apologetic face hinted at a forthcoming apology, but that would have only hurt more, so Draco held up his hand for silence and disappeared into Potter’s filthy Floo.
He didn’t see Potter for a couple days, and was starting to worry that he’d fucked up the best friendship of his entire life when all of a sudden Potter was knocking at his door dressed in the jumper Draco had bought for him, sporting the soft black leather boots Draco always complimented him on in the past.
“Er - want to get some dinner?” Potter asked, nervousness evident in his language and posture.
“What the hell do you think you’re doing?” Draco snapped, far before his rational mind could step in and calm him down.
“I thought I was asking you out on a date.” Potter didn’t miss a beat, and Draco’s heart leapt at the off-chance he was serious.
“Alright,” Draco finally conceded. “But don’t fuck it up.” He offered no further explanation, and Potter didn’t ask for one.
The date started off rockier than Draco would have liked considering how long they’d been friends. But eventually Potter started to relax, which allowed him to relax, and suddenly they were back to being Potter and Malfoy—pals who could take the mickey out of anyone in their immediate vicinity with good-natured smiles hiding their mischievous grins. Only this time, in-between all the shit-talking, they exchanged warm glances and affectionate touches. Potter seemed to have enjoyed himself as much as Draco had, so when Potter went to give him a chaste kiss goodnight, Draco let him. The sheer elation of feeling Potter’s lips against his own caused him to let something slip about a next time, and when Potter’s eyes lit up in response, Draco couldn’t even regret the moment of vulnerability.
From that point on, Draco and Potter were nearly inseparable. Innocent still, in terms of consummation, but inseparable. Gold galleons were grudgingly exchanged between their friends when they turned up together to pub night a week later, hand in hand, but Draco couldn’t even muster up a twinge of annoyance when he realized the bet wasn’t on if they would get together, but when.
***
The second time Potter (unsuccessfully) asked Draco to marry him, they'd been together for just over a year. Potter wanted to go flat-hunting, since they spent so much time over at each other’s places anyway, so Draco humored him by arguing passionately for a charming townhouse in Chelsea over Potter’s idea of getting a large flat in Islington. Even after spending so long as Potter's boyfriend, Draco still couldn't let himself get attached. It was still only a year; less than a negligible part of their overall lives. He’d seen relationships that had lasted much longer end over much less.
Fortunately for Draco, Potter was responsible for a difficult case at work—one involving an illegal potions smuggling ring. He liked taking care of Potter when he was stressed from working so hard (something Draco hadn’t actually believed Potter could do, until he’d seen it with his very own eyes). This took several forms. Sometimes Draco would simply bring Potter coffee brewed just the way he liked it; other times he would give him sensual back massages, working out all the tight muscles Potter managed to tie into knots while scrunched up over his work. Still other times, Draco would slip between Potter’s legs and taste his delicious cock, teasing Potter relentlessly by licking up and down his shaft before swallowing the entire thing and letting Potter fuck his face with abandon. He’d never had to tell Potter that he’d been a virgin when they were together for the first time some months ago because, as with everything, Draco was a quick study. Potter (and Draco too, for that matter) usually preferred to have loving, passionate sex, but sometimes, when Potter was wound up this tightly, Draco was more than willing to take it rough and wildly.
Of course, trust Harry Potter to go and get himself into more trouble than was warranted. Draco was initially pissed when they were both kidnapped, but he couldn't really feel anything but drowsy after the drug they'd used started to take effect.
“Potter, I swear to God you better get the both of us out of here alive,” Draco remembered mumbling.
Potter’s eyes had softened at the sight of him, even though he made a snarky comment about how did Draco like it now that he was caught up in one of the crazy schemes he’d always been so madly jealous of back in school?
“Not so fun, is it, Draco?”
“Shove your sarcasm up your arse and work your half-baked Potter magic,” Draco had growled, blinking wearily to try and clear double-Potters from his vision. “If we die from this, I’ll have no problem killing you again in our afterlife.”
Potter gently closed Draco’s eyes, sensing his struggle to remain conscious. “Dead or not, I still have every intention of marrying you after this is over.”
Was he hearing what he thought he was hearing? Draco couldn’t be sure. At any rate, it was a poor time and place for a marriage proposal. He pretended to fall out of time and space, and, in the next few minutes as he and Potter were attacked by the smugglers, he really did lose consciousness.
Potter thought Draco had forgotten the whole thing after all was said and done, and Draco didn’t bother setting him straight.
***
The next time it happened, it was a highly charged emotional affair. Six months after the kidnapping incident and a year and a half after getting together, Draco and Potter were comfortably living together in a flat they’d both compromised on for the other’s sake and slowly grew to love over time. It was their home. Draco experimented with cooking and baking, refining his culinary skills, while Potter came and helped him—surprisingly enough, the Saviour had hidden talents in the kitchen that had never quite come to fruition in Potions class.
Their morning routine hadn’t changed at all. Draco would still crack witticisms about the events in the gossip pages, some invited, some not, while shielding the section in front of the finance pages. Potter would drink his coffee and give Draco a blow-by-blow of all the Quidditch matches they’d had to miss because of work, taking special pleasure in describing the entirety of a game only to later reveal that he’d been rehashing a Cannons match. Somehow, Draco put up with his dumb arse.
The one thing that had changed was how Potter would wake him up in the morning; slowly and full of loving kisses, draping them all over Draco’s neck, torso, and thighs. Draco had been surprised with how open-minded Potter was about sex. He’d expected to always occupy the bottom position, no questions asked, so it came as a big surprised to him when, during their first time, Potter told him that he wanted to be taken by Draco. It still was a surprise when, every other morning, Potter teased a sleeping Draco to full hardness before lowering himself down on Draco’s cock, and rode him until Draco was fully awake and could turn them over to get more leverage. He never grew tired of watching Potter’s face fill with ecstasy, and then love once Draco had fully taken him apart. The rest of the time, Draco eagerly embraced Potter's cock—somehow, being on the bottom with Potter filling him, loving him, could make him come undone more quickly and thoroughly than anything else.
Granger and the Weasel finally got engaged, which wasn’t a surprise to anyone who knew them. Honestly, it was about damn time already. Of course, this brought new challenges to their relationship. Molly Weasley had an engagement party for the happy couple and insisted that Harry bring Draco along, shrilly claiming that, “You’ve been together for far too long, and almost no-one in the family’s had a proper chance to meet your young man, Harry!” That was a bit rich, since the Weasleys knew exactly who he was, or, rather, who he had been, and not to mention that the past year and a half seemed like forever and yet he was only receiving this invitation now. Maybe there was some hurt covering up his anger. If so, Draco would never admit it.
Potter hadn’t bought his several excuses for needing to stay home, so Draco found himself tagging along to the Weasleys’ get-together. And yes, he said tagging along, because that’s exactly how he felt. Especially when he received a cool welcome from everyone except Ron, who'd long since gotten used to him after months and months of pub nights. The worst part was when Potter decided to go and get chummy with the Weaslette, who looked like a ripped top-model after training and playing with the Harpies all season. Draco knew Potter swung both ways; he wasn’t naive. It only made things worse when Molly Weasley got herself half-wasted and started waxing poetics about how nice it would have been if Harry and Ginny had gotten married straightaway out of Hogwarts. If Potter hadn't been able to read the jealousy, hurt, and anger on Draco’s face after eighteen months together, well then maybe they shouldn’t be together.
He forced himself to politely excuse himself from the gathering the way his mother had taught him and Apparated home, an agitated Harry in tow. Immediately locking himself in the bedroom, Draco sank down against the closed door and let the tears come to to his eyes. He didn’t often indulge in crying, but it was happening more and more frequently, especially where Potter was concerned. At this rate, he’d need to buy a box of tissues for every room in the flat.
“Draco, please open the door,” Potter pleaded. “Everything seemed fine tonight, didn’t it?”
Wrenching open the door, Draco fixed Potter with a murderous glare. “Is that what you think, Potter? Oh really? Did you make that classification after everyone ignored me all night, or before Molly Weasley started passively aggressively hinting at how she wanted you and the Weaslette to get back together?”
“Don’t talk about her like that,” Potter said automatically.
“I’m sorry if the nickname hurts Ginny's delicate sensibilities, Potter!”
“I meant Mrs. Weasley.” There was a slight bite to Potter’s voice this time, and Draco could feel the betrayal seep down to his very core.
He made to slam the door again, but Potter was too quick for him, blocking the jam with his foot and then his body even as Draco tried to crush him with the door. Recognizing that he wasn't going to win, Draco stormed back into the shadows of their bedroom and started taking off his dress robes, attire that had been utterly wasted on a bunch of jean-clad Weasleys. When Draco felt Potter’s hands caress his shoulders, he didn’t immediately shake him off, but the urge remained all the same.
“It’ll get better, Draco, I promise,” Potter said lightly, using the tone Draco always attributed with Draco, please let it go. There was affection behind the words, but the sentiment was crystal clear.
“Sureit will,” Draco cried, turning to look Potter in the eye. “Because all the Weasleys are just going to magically accept that we’re together now and are going to accept me as your partner, especially after my past! No, Potter,” he said angrily, wrenching himself away from Potter’s hands, “I’m going to cause a rift between you and your family. And it’s not like I can ever give you children of your own.”
“Draco — what — what are you saying?” The look on Potter’s face would have broken his heart, had it been whole to begin with.
“We need to get our heads out of our arses and stop playing house,” Draco said savagely. Without a conscious thought in his mind he tugged his old Hogwarts trunk out from under their bed before walking to their shared wardrobe and pulling out an armful of his clothes. When he turned around to dump them on the better, he got a glimpse of Potter’s face, and oh, boy, Draco hadn’t seen Potter that angry since their Hogwarts days.
“What the absolute fuck do you think you’re doing?! Potter shouted, fixing Draco in place with his glare. Behind the facade of anger, Draco could see the fear and panic visible in Potter's eyes. He ignored it.
“I’m saving us both from the heartbreak that’s surely going to occur once you realize you should listen to mommy dearest and marry that stupid Weaslette!”
“Why would you even think —” A vein on Potter’s forehead looked like it was about to pop. He really needed to get his temper under control. “Draco.” Draco ignored him. “Draco, for God’s sake, listen to me!” He didn’t know why he looked up again, but Potter’s eyes were red now, and he seemed to have slightly calmed down. “Draco, I don’t want to be with Ginny.”
“Why not?” Draco whispered brokenly, his own anger evaporating; conscious now of the tears that threatened to spill from his eyes.
Potter stepped closer and gently caressed Draco’s cheek. “Because I want you, you bloody moron.”
The cognitive dissonance was too great; Draco couldn’t rationalize what Potter was saying. Hell, he couldn’t even conceptualize it.“Why?” he had to know.
“Because I love you, Malfoy, and for some odd reason, I want to spend the rest of my life with you!”
Draco was shocked into silence. He stood there, quivering, under Potter’s touch, until Potter sighed and pulled Draco into his arms. With one of Potter’s warm hands clutching his back and the other threading through his hair, Draco finally felt the entirety of that love for the first time, especially when Potter nuzzled his face into the back of Draco’s neck. Potter’s back was warm beneath his own hands, and Potter let out a relieved breath as Draco clutched him tightly.
“I love you too,” he whispered into Potter’s ear. Potter gave him a little squeeze to show that he’d heard.
They stayed that way for some time, reveling in the feeling of one another, until Draco leaned back just the slightest bit so that he could kiss Potter, who responded passionately. Their kiss was wet and Potter’s lips had never felt softer, or maybe Draco had never fully let himself enjoy their intimacy because he always thought it would be ripped from him in an instant. They mutually wound up on the bed, and Potter only broke the kiss long enough to ask Draco what he wanted. His only response was, “You.” Potter smiled, reflecting the love Draco now knew for certain that he felt. Their love-making had always been meaningful before, but this time it was intimate and loving in a way Draco hadn’t known it could be. He found that holes he didn’t even realize were there were healed by Potter’s words and touch. After that night, Draco finally began to think of Potter as Harry.
***
The fourth failed proposal was apparently supposed to be a surprise. Draco had been telling Harry all about his childhood pet kneazle, Sophia, and had hinted at how nice it would be for them to welcome a pet into their home. He’d been even more obvious about it than usual, telling Harry all his favorite breeds and temperaments.
Imagine his surprise, then, when Harry came home from work on their two-year anniversary, shoved him down on the couch, and then plunked a little ball of fur down into his arms.
“What’s this?” Draco asked, eyes widening in shock at the clumsy little kitty clambering all over his lap. “A kitten, Harry?” He smiled in spite of himself. “It’s no kneazle, but it sure is cute.”
A quick glimpse at the kitty’s collar—which read Marry Me?—had Draco rolling his eyes in exasperations. Harry was going to have to try harder than that.
“I can’t marry this cute little kitty,” he cooed, tickling the cat under her tiny chin. “Now can I, Harry?” It was hard to switch off his cutesy-voice, but he managed.
Harry looked like he was about to say something (to try and rescue his failed proposal, Draco supposed) when the kitty shot out of his lap and raced pell-mell across the living room, smashing the vase they’d received as a gift from Draco’s mother before furiously clawing its way up Draco’s expensive drapes. Truth be told, he couldn’t care less about either (the vase was ugly and ruined the aesthetic of Draco’s meticulously decorated living room) and he’d actually been meaning to talk Harry into repainting the room and buying new, matching drapes. Now he had the perfect excuse.
“Naughty kitty!” cried Draco, leaping to his feet and feigning anger when secretly he was absolutely amused by the kitten’s antics.
Harry Summoned the kitten, who sank its claws into the fabric and riiiiiiipped the fabric as it came careening across the room. Draco burst out laughing and sank back onto the couch, clutching his stomach.
“You’re not mad?” Harry asked, bewildered, holding the bad kitty arms length away.
“How could I be mad?” Draco asked, sure that a sickeningly loving smile had spread its way across his face. The cutesy-voice came back out as he exclaimed, “You brought me a widdle-kitty!”
Harry almost dropped said widdle-kitty. “Please don’t ever say that again, Draco! Ugh, maybe I would have reconsidered if I’d have known you’d be like this.”
The kitten squirmed in Harry’s arms, so he deposited it back in Draco’s lap. “You’re going to be a good little kitty, aren’t you?” Draco cooed. He cuddled it tightly in his arms, curling up on the couch for a nap.
Despite himself, Harry couldn't stop his eyes from softening. “Come lay with us, Harry,” Draco said, already feeling the first wave of sleepiness hit. “And I won’t do it again.”
He was sure Harry wouldn’t refuse an offer like that, especially when he was tired from work. Just as he expected, Harry scooted behind him on the couch, snuggling up against Draco before reaching his hand underneath Draco’s arm and entwining their hands together on top of the soft kitty.
***
The fifth time, Draco decided to take matters into his own hands. He went out and bought a classic gold ring, one that wouldn’t get in Harry’s way at work. His lover’s style preferences had always been simple, down to earth, and comfortable, so Draco knew that Harry would love this ring. He loved it too; how couldn’t he, when it was to be the ring Harry wore to show his love for Draco?
Harry was acting suspicious. Draco didn’t want to read too much into the situation, but, then again, he thought he might have a pretty good reason why Harry was acting like an overeager lunatic. Eventually, he calmed down, but Draco couldn’t guess the reason: there hadn’t been an achingly romantic proposal that swept Draco off of his feet, after all.
Draco didn’t fuss over when or where he’d ask Harry for his hand. Honestly, he wanted to do it at the same time Harry asked him, so the ball was never in his court to begin with. He kept it on a chain around his neck, tucked away during the day and slipped into a ball of socks at night so that Harry wouldn’t get suspicious.
Mr. Sulley’s case was driving Draco up a wall. He never should have gone into law, not if it gave him this much hassle, but there wasn’t much to be done about it now. Especially since he liked the paychecks that came along with being a junior partner at the barrister’s office. His only consolation was that, while he was wasting time on work an intern could be doing, Harry was away on official Auror business being equally taxed on the continent.
Bête
, at least, made good company while Harry was gone, her soft fur tickling Draco’s arms as she squirmed in-between him and his work in an attempt to get Draco to pet her.
When Harry got back, he insisted on taking a Portkey and doing a day vacation on an island south of France. It was just as romantic as Draco could have hoped, and though he brought his ring along, Harry made no motion to propose. The sex they had right there on the open beach was good though, as was their picnic lunch they refueled with after, and Draco couldn’t have been happier with how the afternoon had turned out.
Back at home, when Harry asked him to sit on the couch, Draco knew the moment had arrived. The scotch Harry brought him burned his throat, but it was the good kind of burn. The one that came before something momentous.
As Harry knelt down, Draco thought he knew what was coming next. Even though there was no ring box in sight, he slid down to the floor, matching Harry’s bent posture.
“Draco?” he laughed. “What are you doing?”
“Exactly what you’re doing,” Draco said firmly. “God, I’ve been waiting forever to do this; what took you so long?”
Harry opened his mouth to explain, but what ended up coming out was, “I love you.”
“I love you too,” Draco said, and he was about to say more, but suddenly there were the simultaneous sounds of the Floo chiming and an owl flying into a window. He looked at Harry, and they both shared an exasperated sigh.
“Draco!” a shrill voice called.
“Guess I have window, you have Floo,” Harry murmured, standing up to let in the owl.
Draco stomped over to the Floo, only to see his former best friend’s face in the flames. “Pansy, you bint, what the fuck are you doing?” he hissed. “You've only just all but ruined the best moment of my life!”
“Can I come through? There's an utter crisis happening, Draco, and I need you immediately.”
“Might as well let her,” Harry said, putting a sympathetic hand on Draco’s shoulder. “Urgent Ministry business. I’ve been called back to the continent, but this time, I have to go in undercover.”
“Be safe,” Draco said, leaning in to kiss Harry goodbye. Their lips met for just a brief second before Harry was snatching up his travel bag and whisking his way out the door.
“Well, come on already, I haven’t got all day, you know!”
***
When they finally got it right, it was on a regular day, at a regular time. Harry spent two and a half months after their spontaneous trip to France on the undercover mission, leaving Draco with a lot of time to think about what he really wanted out of life. He looked down at
Bête and silently wondered if he would have changed anything about their life. It didn’t take him long to come to the conclusion that the answer was no, he wouldn’t change an absolute thing.
Harry wrote letters while he was away, letters containing more romantic sentiments than Draco ever dreamed Harry was capable of having. It warmed his stomach to know that he meant every last word written on the page. His writing was less sentimental, but Draco tried to convey the depth of his love all the same.
After Harry got back, two days before their three-year anniversary, he came to help Draco in the kitchen with a new stew recipe. He’d just finished tossing in freshly-chopped carrots, and turned back around to snatch the potato cubes, but Harry took Draco’s hands and stopped him short.
“Draco,” he said earnestly. “I’ve spent the last three years trying to come up with the perfect way to propose to you, and I think that the more I try the worse my attempts are going to get.” Draco had to smile at this. “But if you’ll have me, I’d like to marry you. I love you more than anything and I want to spend the rest of my life with you.” Harry held up a simple platinum band, which Draco loved immediately.
“On one condition,” Draco said, beaming at Harry. He reached beneath his shirt and ripped off the chain, sliding the gold ring off and into his hand. “I’ve loved you for years, Harry, and have been waiting to ask if you’ll have me as well.”
“Of course, you great git,” Harry grinned, leaning in to kiss Draco. After, Harry slowly slid his ring onto Draco’s finger, and then Draco did the same for Harry.
Draco noticed Harry looking at the gold ring, and asked, “Do you like it?”
“I do,” Harry answered, kissing Draco again. “I was just thinking about how well you must know me, to be able to pick out something I like so much.”
“I was just thinking the same thing,” Draco admitted, admiring his own platinum ring.
Despite the temptation to host a big, extravagant wedding with all the bells and whistles like the ones commonly featured in the society pages, Harry and Draco settled for a simple ceremony after signing their marriage certificate at the Ministry Courtroom for Marriages, Bonds, and Unity Ceremonies. They hadn’t told anyone about their plans, but they'd were congratulated by friends and family just the same. Molly Weasley even insisted on throwing a reception in the field beyond the Burrow, going well out of her way to make up for Draco’s less-than-warm welcome to the family a number of years ago. This time, he could honestly say he fully enjoyed the occasion.
Life really hadn’t changed much for Draco after he and Harry were finally married. They still worked too much and played too little, and now everyone was trying to pressure them into having kids. But Draco liked the way things were. He liked waking up to morning sex, fixing Harry coffee and reading the newspaper together, snuggling together with Bête at their side, and trying out new recipes every other weekend. He liked the spontaneous vacations, their cheesy declarations of love for one another, and the way Harry’s face would light up every time he walked into the room.
“Hey, Potter,” Draco shouted, as they flew around the Manor grounds after having a couple of tea with Narcissa, “I'm going to knock you off of that broom!”
Harry mock-glared at him. “I’d like to see you try, Malfoy!”
“Scared?”
“You wish.”
He didn’t need more invitation to fly straight into Harry, knocking them both out the air and onto the dewy grass. As they rolled around on the wet ground, trying to wrestle the advantage out from one another, Draco thought of how lucky he was to be able to share his life with the only man he’d ever truly loved.
|
10690188
|
The Deftest Potato
|
{
"Archive Warning": "No Archive Warnings Apply",
"Category": "Gen",
"Characters": "Lon'qu (Fire Emblem), Wrys",
"Fandom": "Fire Emblem Heroes",
"Language": "English",
"Rating": "General Audiences",
"author": "by twilightstarr",
"chapters": "1/1",
"completed": "",
"published": "2017-04-21T00:00:00",
"words": "303",
"Additional Tags": "Lon'qu's fear of women, Humor",
"Relationship": null,
"Character": null,
"Relationships": null,
"Series": "Heroes of The Realms",
"Collections": null,
"Fandoms": null,
"Archive Warnings": null,
"Categories": null,
"Bookmarks": null,
"Chapters": null,
"Comments": null,
"Completed": null,
"Hits": null,
"Kudos": null,
"Published": null,
"Words": null,
"Updated": null
}
|
Gossip had spread through of the Order of Heroes about Lon’qu’s legendary potato peeling skills. One afternoon, about a dozen women from various realms gathered in the kitchen, eager to witness the unsuspecting swordsman’s work.They were not disappointed. Lon’qu’s knife flew across the skin of the potatoes with speed and dexterity like none of them had ever seen before. It was truly a wonder to behold. Lon’qu, so focused on his task, failed to notice the audience of females forming behind him, eyes wide at his swift and graceful movements… until one of them tripped over another’s feet. They recovered, but not without making just enough sound to alert Lon’qu of their presence. He looked up, then grunted in pain as he cut a finger and dropped the potato and knife in shock. He backed into the counter as though surrounded by a pack of wolves. “Go away!” He half commanded, half pleaded. The group of women dispersed awkwardly with mumbled apologies.Once they were gone, Lon’qu released a deep breath, then bent down to pick up the knife and resume his potato peeling. Luckily for him, Wrys was one of his fellow cooks. The priest set a sympathetic hand on Lon’qu’s shoulder and said with some confusion, “Are you alright? Maybe you should take a little break.” “Women… make me nervous,” he explained setting the knife and half-peeled potato on the counter. “Ah, I see. I did not know they would make you uncomfortable. Here, let me heal your hand.” Compared to the gashes and burns from swords and spells heroes would often suffer in battle, a cut like this was no big deal. Wrys didn't even need his staff to seal the skin back together with only a touch. “Thank you,” said Lon’qu, briefly but sincerely, before returning to work.
|
10607859
|
Breakfast in Bed
|
{
"Archive Warning": "No Archive Warnings Apply",
"Category": "F/F",
"Characters": "Kousaka Honoka, Minami Kotori, Sonoda Umi",
"Fandom": "Love Live! School Idol Project",
"Language": "English",
"Rating": "General Audiences",
"author": "by orphan_account",
"chapters": "1/1",
"completed": "",
"published": "2017-04-12T00:00:00",
"words": "748",
"Additional Tags": "Early Mornings, Post-Canon, Domestic Fluff, sleepy girls need their rest, honoka messes up again",
"Relationship": "Kousaka Honoka/Minami Kotori/Sonoda Umi",
"Character": null,
"Relationships": null,
"Series": null,
"Collections": null,
"Fandoms": null,
"Archive Warnings": null,
"Categories": null,
"Bookmarks": null,
"Chapters": null,
"Comments": null,
"Completed": null,
"Hits": null,
"Kudos": null,
"Published": null,
"Words": null,
"Updated": null
}
|
Honoka stirred awake to a weird noise and buzzing coming from her pillow. Seriously, what was that...? She vaguely remembered setting an alarm for early Saturday morning. Oh, right! Honoka quickly pulled her phone from her pillow case (she hoped it would muffle the sound) and shut off her alarm before it had a chance to wake up Kotori and Umi. Honoka sat up in their bed to find the two other girls snuggled up on either side of her, trapping her in bed. Kotori, still asleep, looked disgruntled at the sudden movement. Honoka quickly tucked the blankets back around the sleeping girl. Good thing Umi was a heavy sleeper. Honoka wondered how she would manage to climb out of bed without disturbing her two sleeping beauties. She had to escape somehow, or she would've waken up at 7:00 am on a weekend for nothing! God, who does that? In her mind, she hatched a plan. If she couldn't go over the other girls, she'd have to go under. Or between. Whatever.Careful not to disturb her sleeping girlfriends, she climbed under the blankets. Being this early, the sun hadn't even fully risen yet, leaving the space under the blankets nearly pitch black. Honoka could hardly tell who's legs belonged to who. Good. Honoka loved a challenge. She went face first into the dark maze, feeling around with her hands."Okay, so this is... this is Kotori's leg," she thought, hearing the leg's owner's sleepy groans of annoyance. Getting distracted, she tried to find her place again. "Legs, knees, feet, toes... okay, so Kotori's on the left, so i should be going right, towards the door," she thought, and began heading the other direction. Her arm felt a lock of Umi's long hair and she knew she was going the right way. She feared waking Umi up most of all. Umi was scary when she was grumpy, and she was most certainly not a morning person.She felt Umi's long legs in front of her, blocking her path off the bed."Umi, Umiii~, she whispered, but Umi's legs would not budge. It was time to try a more intense strategy. She tried rolling Umi over, but she was heavy as a log. "Stubborn, even when you're asleep," Honoka thought with a smile. Okay. No more messing around. A devious grin flashed onto her face."Tickle, tickle, tickle~"Umi's warrior instincts butt in, and she kicked Honoka right in the face."Ouch!!! Jeez, Umi!!!" Honoka cried out. The shock of the sudden impact caused her to roll right off the bed."Honoka!?" Umi yelled, "What on earth are you doing up!?""You just kicked me in the face!!" Honoka pouted out her bottom lip, trying to gain sympathy."Huh...?" Kotori rubbed her eyes sleepily. "What are you guys doing...?""Dangit, Umi!!! How will my plan work now that everyone's up!?""Plan?" Kotori giggled at her girlfriends' antics. "Honoka, maybe you could tell us what's up?""Well," Honoka sighed, "Since you guys are always looking out for me, I was thinking of making you guys a surprise breakfast. So I tried to get out of bed without waking you up, and then...""Oh, Honoka!!" Kotori gasped, "A special breakfast in bed? That's so sweet." Umi's glare softened, but only a little. "Wait... you weren't planning to use the oven, were you?"Honoka grumbled something that sounded like a 'maybe'."Not without us you're not!!" Umi barked, "There is no way I'm letting you set our house on fire.""Jeez, Umi, you're such a mom," Honoka teased. Umi sighed, and tried her best to stay angry. It didn't work, she couldn't stay mad at her girlfriend for long. Kotori giggled."Don't worry Honoka," Kotori said, hopping down from the bed and helping her girlfriend up off the floor. "We can all make a special breakfast together." Honoka smiled from ear to ear. "You guys... you're the best!!!" She grabbed her girlfriends and pulled them into a tight group hug. "This is kind of uncomfortable," Umi mumbled. Kotori only laughed."Come on," Honoka said, the spring back in her step, "We still have time! Let's make the best breakfast ever!!""Time for what? I didn't know there was a time limit," Umi teased."What were you thinking, Honoka? I could go for a pancake," asked Kotori."How about crêpes?" Umi suggested."Ooh, fancy," Honoka smiled. The girls made their way to their kitchen, and got ready to prepare their breakfast, together.
|
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