reviewId int64 363k 588k | userId int64 33.9k 15.9M | itemId int64 1 1.42M | rating float64 1 10 | title stringlengths 1 10.9k ⌀ | content stringlengths 81 11.6k ⌀ |
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406,403 | 2,020,269 | 244,782 | 3 | Serial Boredom | The Secret Life starts with the worst possible narrative intro : " The crimes committed by Jeffrey Dahmer are too horrible to make a film about . . . " . Okay , so what are you suggesting ? That we shouldn't bother to continue watching as the film won't be accurate or bloody , anyway ? And they were right , too ! The... |
404,598 | 2,020,269 | 365,289 | 3 | Occasionally grim . . . but mostly dull | Grimm is a remotely original and well-intended Dutch re-working of the famous Hansel and Gretel fairy-tale , updated with nowadays social issues like violence , sexual perversion and even the mafia-like trade in human organs ! Siblings Maria and Jacob are left behind in the Dutch woods by their father and intend to h... |
405,077 | 2,020,269 | 61,411 | 3 | Far BELOW the British horror standard from that time . . . | You'll have to agree about one aspect of this movie ? these British scriptwriters sure knew how to think up appealing titles ! Look at this : blood + beast + terror ? Separately , these three words already make every horror lover slaver . Together , they form the title to a seemly indispensable horror film . Sadly , th... |
404,934 | 2,020,269 | 78,235 | 3 | How many of these " Last Houses " were constructed ? ! ? | Another vile and rapidly edited Italian exploitation effort that just mildly succeeds in cashing in on the enormous ' popularity ' of Wes Craven's horror landmark " Last House on the Left " . Three bank robbers drive up to a remote beach house where they plan to hide from the police after a successful heist . Staying a... |
405,415 | 2,020,269 | 87,746 | 3 | Til Embalment Do Us Part | Ah , the glorious 1980's . . . A nearly inexhaustible source of anonymous and super-cheesy horror movies that are often too atrocious to even mention . " Mortuary " , not exactly blessed with the most unique title , is such a long and righteously forgotten movie that will immediately disappear from your memory again as... |
405,389 | 2,020,269 | 87,759 | 3 | May I have this dance of death ? | Lucio Fulci is a usually very remarkable director who moves with the times , that's for sure . Following the huge success of stupid dancing movies , like " Fame " and " Flashdance " , it was an inexplicably popular trend in the early 1980's to insert overlong dancing sequences in horror films as well . Fulci was one of... |
405,900 | 2,020,269 | 87,798 | 3 | Sick , sick , sick ! ! . . . and STUPI | The structure and intelligence-level of this hopeless little gem is so dumb it almost becomes legendary . Here we have God and Satan themselves sitting in train , discussing whether a few bizarre characters belong in hell ? or in heaven . This aspect provides the film with the most bizarre wraparound story ever used in... |
404,470 | 2,020,269 | 77,912 | 3 | They thought their lives would be a Mardi Gras ; a never-ending party ? | Mardi Gras Massacre is a very , very ( very ) bad seventies film ; approximately 75 % retelling of , and 25 % homage to Hershell Gordon-Lewis ' " Blood Feast " . Now , I know what you're thinking and you're correct ! Why would anyone want to remake a movie like " Blood Feast " , let alone pay good money to see it ? A... |
406,529 | 2,020,269 | 113,043 | 3 | Disney's " Pinocchio " was scarier ? | Nice try ? but that's about the only positive thing you can say about this lackluster attempt to blend psychological thriller with eerie horror monsters . The script desperately tries to be intelligent and innovating but the result is a very poor and tedious movie , even for the already low 90's standards . The story h... |
405,318 | 2,020,269 | 77,848 | 3 | Shania Twain said it best when she sung : " Man ! I feel like a Woman ! " | Some of her previous accomplishments ( like " Deadly Weapons " and " Diary of a Nudist " ) already taught us that Doris Wishman isn't ranked very high on the list of filmmakers with good taste and moral values , but I never thought she would even dare to exploit people that struggled with sex and identity crises all th... |
406,381 | 2,020,269 | 233,142 | 3 | In the words of the King : ' Return to Sender ! ' | Okay , so the title of my little review might be a bit harsh . 3 . 000 Miles to Graceland isn't that bad and , at times , very imaginative and funny . But , let's face it ? despite of the talented cast and a few original ideas , this productions isn't nearly as decent as it could have been . And it's merely the inexper... |
405,275 | 2,020,269 | 66,479 | 3 | Hornee . . . Is that really his name ? | Now , what exactly is this supposed to be ? Let's pose the same question in multiple-choice format , shall we ? Is " Trader Hornee " : A ? a comedy ? B ? a sex film ? C ? a jungle adventure ? D ? all of the above . Surely the creators will try and convince you it's a mixture of everything , but the painful truth is tha... |
405,083 | 2,020,269 | 130,487 | 3 | Oh no ! ! Not Kentucky mountain hillbillies again ! | It's a shame that this lovely site doesn't feature a poster image of this ' Geek ' , a . k . a Backwoods . The VHS copy I rented showed a mad-raving freak , waving around a butcher's hatchet . It attracts horror lovers and , in all honesty , I have to admit that the cover motivated me to rent it without knowing anythin... |
405,606 | 2,020,269 | 87,616 | 3 | I Love Your Music But This Movie Is Venomous Poison | Yours truly is one of them sour people who's incredibly annoyed by the trend of inexperienced singers ( mostly hip-hop & pop stars ) getting lead roles in films just because they're immensely popular among teenage audiences . Although this mainly happens nowadays , lame directors have apparently always been recruiting ... |
405,654 | 2,020,269 | 47,898 | 3 | Ed Wood deserves a bit more credit for this . . . | SPOILERS AHEAD ! Many years ago , Bride of the Monster was the first Edward D . Wood movie I ever saw . I didn't quite understand what was so terrible about it then and I still quite haven't figured it out . Especially when you're comparing it to most of his other movies , Bride of the Monster is a fairly decent motion... |
406,471 | 2,020,269 | 83,722 | 3 | Beauty and the Beast in one ? | I'm writing this review after just having finished watching Cat People and I'm suffering from mixed feelings a bit . . . . I certainly expected it to be better and more valuable than this ? especially because the I heard so much praising on it . Paul Schrader remakes the brilliant 1942 classic with the same title . The... |
404,492 | 2,020,269 | 478,135 | 3 | Time to Re-Animate Jeffrey Combs ' career ! | One of the most pathetic and deceitful things a movie producer can do is promote his / her crap film by exploiting the name of a famous and extremely popular veteran actor and then subsequently only cast the popular veteran actor in a role that isn't much larger than a cameo appearance . Jeffrey Combs is incredibly pop... |
404,708 | 2,020,269 | 303,816 | 3 | Rotten ! | THIS is the long awaited and fresh horror from the new prodigy Roth ? What did I miss then ? Because all I saw was a bunch of irritating , stinking , uninspired and unfunny crap ! Director Eli Roth is the ' future of horror ' as much as I am Mother Theresa ! In an interview , I saw Roth talking about how annoying he th... |
404,504 | 2,020,269 | 91,829 | 3 | Ah . . . delightful 80's crap ! ! | Rawhead Rex stands as my purest guilty pleasure ! ! Widely considered to be pure garbage and a complete cheesefest ! I like it up till a certain level , since it's so silly and amateurish . Rawhead is the name of an ancient Irish demon that actually predates the Christian-Church era ! Raising demons seemed to be pretty... |
405,009 | 2,020,269 | 69,933 | 3 | Speed it up , Vampire-grandma ! | Crypt of the Living Dead is an extremely low-budgeted Spanish production that centers on the resurrection of a malicious vampire queen after being asleep on an island for nearly 7 whole centuries . Directors Julio Salvador and Ray Danton sure as hell did their best to make Hannah ( quite a modern name for an ancient ... |
406,661 | 2,020,269 | 272,575 | 3 | Can it be today , please ? | The day the WORLD ended ? Gee , isn't that a little too melodramatic ? Since when do some mildly ominous events in a small town of hillbillies affect the existence of the entire world ? Or maybe this is all just because this film is part of a series of TV-remakes of cheap & nearly forgotten Sci-Fi films , dating back t... |
405,935 | 2,020,269 | 91,778 | 3 | The Other Side is just as dull . . . | Personally , I hated " Poltergeist " with a passion , but I can't really blame producers for wanting to further exploit a profitable franchise , especially not when I can watch these sequels for free on the television . The original " Poltergeist " , directed by Tobe Hooper but clearly a Spielberg-pastiche , is one of ... |
405,322 | 2,020,269 | 96,246 | 3 | Premature monster-ejaculation ! | Okay , you've heard about " so-bad-it's-good " movies before , but this demented little thing plays in an entirely different league . " The Terror Within " is so bad it's ? . really , truly freaking abysmally bad ! It's a cheesy and minimally plotted 80's earthbound " Alien " imitation and it's produced by Roger Corman... |
405,225 | 2,020,269 | 96,000 | 3 | Got Ammo ? | The all-time favorite movie of director Bruno Mattei ? may he rest in peace ? undoubtedly must have been " Predator " . One of the last films Mattei made before his death was called " Cannibal Ferox 3 : Land of Death " and it was an extremely blatant imitation of " Predator " where he simply replaced the intergalactic ... |
405,528 | 2,020,269 | 83,019 | 3 | The Godfather of Sleaze strikes again ! | Generally speaking , I'm a an admirer of Jess Franco's film-making but , for some of this movies , I really have difficulties understanding the motivation behind them or even their reason of existence . Like this sick puppy , for example . " Sadomania " has absolutely no cinematic value , it's poorly made without any s... |
404,714 | 2,020,269 | 74,475 | 3 | A painful miscarriage of a film . . . | First and foremost I'd like to state - for the record - that it's incredibly dumb to call your movie " Embryo " when the subject matter exclusively revolves on scientific research performed on fetuses ( animal as well as human ) aged 12-16 weeks . The embryonic stage is over at the end of the eighth pregnancy week and ... |
406,168 | 2,020,269 | 74,469 | 3 | Elsa is no patch on " Ilsa " and THIS is a boring film ! | All aboard the sleaze-train ! Hitler's latest invention to boost the moral among his exhausted and unmotivated SS-officers . Led by killer shrew Elsa , a former prostitute and overly fanatic patriot , a train filled with ravishing ladies rides to the war fronts and the girls offer sexual services in their carriages . "... |
406,567 | 2,020,269 | 435,665 | 3 | How embarrassing for Uwe Boll . . . | Isn't it strange how crap-movies always tend to be a little better when you start watching them with an attitude like : " boy , this is going to suck harder than few things have ever sucked before " ? It's pretty much impossible for anyone to rent this movie with high ? or even remotely positive - expectations , as " H... |
405,394 | 2,020,269 | 757,215 | 3 | I'm horny , . . . let's drink some blood ! | The opening sequences of this film promptly indicate that it'll be a 100 % silly and immature horror / comedy that requires you to leave all your remaining brain capacities at the door . As Count Dracula rises from his coffin when the night falls over his Transsylvanian castle , he's stung by an ordinary mosquito that ... |
404,467 | 2,020,269 | 78,749 | 3 | Going deeper underground . . . | This massively incoherent , dumb , cheesy and amateurish Italian early-eighties " movie-thing " rewards itself with the title " Alien 2 " but there's very little , even no relation with Ridley Scott's Sci-Fi masterpiece that single-handedly altered the status of the genre . This is written and directed by Ciro Ippolito... |
406,222 | 2,020,269 | 47,149 | 3 | An entire alien-race of Marty Feldmans ? ! ? | Killers from Space is cheap and silly but mainly boring 60's Sci-Fi that incomprehensibly escaped the attention of the genius MST3K-team . The film starts somewhat promising and there's an amusement peek near the middle , but overall it's pretty useless and forgettable . The only reason why some people still occasion... |
405,061 | 2,020,269 | 486,099 | 3 | 20 , 000 Leagues of Sheer Boredom ! | At one point , still very early in the film , the male lead character can be seen reading a copy of Jules Verne's legendary novel " 20 , 000 Leagues Under The Sea " and even later in the film the book is mentioned several times more . This wasn't a coincidental choice , as the novel ( and even more so the classic 50's ... |
405,763 | 2,020,269 | 100,728 | 3 | Killer Robot-Chicken | Total & utter trash , this moronic low budget Sci-Fi flick about a genetically engineered army robot that reproduces itself by laying eggs ( ! ) and naturally turns against its creators before it's even properly finished . In some desperate attempts to thicken the unoriginal plot , there's the lame sub plot about a nos... |
406,239 | 2,020,269 | 276,816 | 3 | We all DIE in a yellow submarine | Well , sure it isn't a YELLOW submarine but you get the whole picture . I certainly ain't complaining about this movie . On the contrary , I thought it was rather original . This film is a combination of a WWII story and a horror-suspense thriller . It sure ain't easy to bring these genres together and because of that ... |
405,696 | 2,020,269 | 159,948 | 3 | Alice Doesn't Trip Here Anymore | The recent revival of Grindhouse-cinema ( courtesy of Quentin Tarantino and Robert Rodriguez ) thankfully brought some lost and presumed missing horror and exploitation gems of the late 60's and 70's back in to the spotlights , but inevitably it also helped bringing some awful and righteously forgotten stinkers to the ... |
404,653 | 2,020,269 | 95,878 | 3 | Death by . . . Anthrax ! | What we have here is another entirely redundant and ineptly processed 80's fraternity-slasher that isn't worth watching at all . Okay , I say it isn't worth watching , but somehow I always end up tracking them down because they usually feature at least some good killing sequences and / or a nice trivia-element . The tr... |
405,589 | 2,020,269 | 245,674 | 3 | Who you gonna call ? ! Ghost-bastards ! | Despite being an admirer of the eccentric director William Castle , I sadly never saw his original version of " 13 Ghosts " . Supposedly that's not such a big loss , since Castle's movies were only worth seeing in the theater at the time they came out because they involved a lot of ingenious gimmicks and appealing prom... |
404,513 | 2,020,269 | 52,846 | 3 | Bad . . . and not even in a fun way ! | I like to believe I'm quite an open-minded person when it comes to trashy 50's and 60's B-movies and I can even name several titles from that period I truly enjoyed . But , either I was having a bad day when I saw or this " Giant Gila Monster " really is worthless ! An extremely over-sized Gila monster terrorizes a lit... |
405,171 | 2,020,269 | 481,280 | 3 | Hey . . . I thought we " Saw " " Hostel " already ? | Some gorehound-friends recommended " Live Feed " to me , and basically I can't really complain as the film certainly does deliver copious amounts of gross smut and buckets full of sleaze , but it is of course not a very good film . More than obviously cashing in on the latest trend in horror cinema , the so-called Tort... |
405,353 | 2,020,269 | 78,350 | 3 | 156 minutes about lousy BEES ? ! ? | One of the countless reasons why horror is such a terrific genre is because the films are usually rather short and to the point , without too many redundant sub plots or pointless sentimentality . Well , apparently that wasn't Irwin Allen's idea of a cool horror / disaster movie , as his director's cut of " The Swarm "... |
404,712 | 2,020,269 | 65,887 | 3 | So much potential . . . yet so very incoherent . | I'll be a little less harsh than my fellow reviewers here , who all seem to agree that this ' Incense for the Damned ' is a giant waste of time , effort and film . I can't deny this is a failure in all viewpoints but I'm deeply convinced that the story's potential , along with the talent of the cast , could have result... |
404,674 | 2,020,269 | 286,306 | 3 | Dreadful watch | It seems to be rather popular recently to mix horror elements with the real-life misery of war . Sometimes that works out real well , like in " Below " ( and even " Dog Soldiers " up till a certain level ) but in this case , it ended up being a failure and a missed opportunity . Nine British soldiers are stuck in an ab... |
405,187 | 2,020,269 | 74,729 | 3 | Mein ( boring ) Kampf | Never thought that I , as a native Dutch speaker , would encounter irremovable Dutch subtitles on a Region 1 movie that came imported from the USA ! This movie is available in the newly released " Grindhouse Experience " box-set , but since it never officially came out on DVD , the version is clearly ripped from an anc... |
405,859 | 2,020,269 | 57,302 | 3 | A Giggling Elephant Man ? | Oh boy ? I'm usually a big sucker for Gothic horror fables , especially the Italian-produced ones , but this " Tomb of Torture " is a painful misfire in nearly every department ( except for the delicious title , of course ) . It already begins sort of negatively , with very hectic and seemingly appealing opening sequen... |
405,404 | 2,020,269 | 454,970 | 3 | An Eye for an Eye , a Kidney for a Kidney ! | Director John Stockwell clearly loves beautiful young girls in tight and colorful bikinis . There's absolutely nothing wrong with that ( in fact , can you blame him ? ) , but after " Blue Crush " , " Into the Blue " and now " Turistas " , it's becoming rather difficult for him to convince us that he wants to be seen as... |
404,814 | 2,020,269 | 87,127 | 3 | Excuse me , Miss . . . But your boobs are hanging out the whole time . | Wha-BAM ! Someone surely had fun devouring a whole truckload of acid-mushrooms and then subsequently scripting this crazy excuse for a motion picture ! Writer Howard Cohen expands the " Sword & Sorcery " concept with a couple of extra S's , like Sex , Silliness , ( more ) Sex and Sheer Stupidity ! This isn't just a mov... |
405,484 | 2,020,269 | 113,409 | 3 | Fiction . . . or reality ? Ah , who cares ! It's all nonsense | Supposedly Carpenter's return to the more eerie , atmospheric ? and most importantly ? story driven horror ! Maybe so , but I don't really share the enthusiasm . Personally , I think this film is a little TOO story-driven and it ends up being an over-ambitious and confusing mess . The typically Lovecraftian themes and ... |
405,369 | 2,020,269 | 90,322 | 3 | Wild Beasts - Terrible Film | Brainless , senseless and ? most of all ? pointless Italian exploitation fodder that somewhat enjoys an infamous reputation because director Franco Prosperi supposedly sacrificed the lives of innocent & defenseless animals in order to make his film appear more realistic . I , for one , can't judge if this is wholly tru... |
404,684 | 2,020,269 | 434,964 | 3 | The Flying ( Teenage ? ) Mutant ( Ninja ? ) Turtle ! | What's that there in the skies ? Is it a plane ? Is it Superman ? ? Errr , no ? It's a TURTLE ! ? ! See , that's what becomes of the Cold War ! Nothing but bad news and other issues ! The Americans shoot down a Russian combat plane somewhere over Artic territory and the subsequent explosion defrosts & literally awakens... |
406,185 | 2,020,269 | 86,984 | 3 | Dull and unappealing fan-boy stuff | Brian DePalma's " Body Double " isn't a very good thriller , in fact , the only REALLY disturbing thing about it is the director's own and always-increasing obsession for Alfred Hitchcock's persona . Fans of DePalma ( and I know there are a lot ) will never admit this , but you can't refer to his work anymore as being ... |
405,744 | 2,020,269 | 366,174 | 3 | Snakes ! But not on a plane . . . | Even though it came out much later than anyone expected ( seven years is an awful long time for a horror sequel ) , " Anacondas " has a whole lot in common with the first Anaconda movie that came out in 1997 . In fact , it's almost exactly the same movie . The creators even managed to find a replacement Latina actress ... |
406,423 | 2,020,269 | 67,099 | 3 | The End of My Attention Span ? | Now I know José Mojica Marins ( a . k . a . Coffin Joe ) is pretty much considered a demigod amongst a selected but avidly fanatic group of cult cinema lovers , and I also realize I still have to see more of his work before I can judge properly , but I'm really not the slightest bit impressed so far ! I could only appr... |
405,314 | 2,020,269 | 94,597 | 3 | . . . And Dead FISH Will Rain Down from the Sky ! | This odd , incoherent , cheesy and ridicule late-80's horror feature represents the directorial debut of Robert ' Freddy Krueger ' Englund . And let's be honest , if it wouldn't be for his name on the credits , the film would have been righteously forgotten a long time ago already . " 976-Evil " has an absurdly implaus... |
405,811 | 2,020,269 | 343,449 | 3 | Mr . Sandman ? Throw me a BONE ! | The Bone Snatcher starts out extremely promising , with the introduction of a new and original type of unseen evil as well as with the use of the sublimely isolated filming location of the African desert . Whilst checking pipelines out in the desert , three miners are attacked and killed by a seemingly unworldly crea... |
404,971 | 2,020,269 | 492,486 | 3 | Where's the complementary sample ? | Shrooms ? like the title obviously implies ? is a prototypic slasher movie that takes place in Ireland whilst the main characters are experiencing outrageous drug-trips brought on by mushrooms . Well , the distributors should have offered free samples of these psychedelic mushrooms to anyone courageous enough to rent... |
406,035 | 2,020,269 | 157,197 | 3 | Talk about Bad Taste ! | Bad-movie lovers , beware ? . Your standards will have to be set extremely low in case you want to remotely enjoy Herb Robins ' " The Worm Eaters " . This movie , produced by one of the über-gurus of crap cinema Ted V . Mikels ? is BEYOND bad ! It has an irredeemably dumb plot , a totally incoherent narrative structure... |
405,346 | 2,020,269 | 71,627 | 3 | Awesome opening credits ! ! ! . . . That's it . | This is the type of movie where it actually hurts to acknowledge that it really , really sucks . I normally sanctify stuff like this ! Early 70's grindhouse flicks with scrumptious sounding titles and a schlocky low-budget atmosphere usually ROCK . " House of Seven Corpses " appeared to dispose of even more trumps , si... |
404,454 | 2,020,269 | 109,858 | 3 | It's embarrassing . . . man | If there's one thing I've learned from reading the other reviews around here , it's definitely that " Funny Man " is the type of film that you either praise into the heavens or hate with a passion ; there doesn't appear to be a middle way . Personally I'm tempted to unite with the hate crew , but that is preeminently b... |
406,167 | 2,020,269 | 82,537 | 3 | Humongous turkey ! | This is one of those 80's slashers in which the teenagers are SO stupid that they really deserve to die , and it actually takes way too long until they get wiped out , if you ask me . The movie opens very promising , with a brutal rape-sequence on an island inhabited by a small community of people . This intro fools yo... |
404,569 | 2,020,269 | 222,294 | 3 | It's true ! The pen ( cil ) IS mightier than the sword ! | Raise your hand with pride if your country of origin is Belgium , just like this utterly brilliant ( ahem ? ) and obscure horror movie ! What ? No response ? Well , that's understandable because this movie is , in fact , a complete turkey and probably our country's worst export-product since that cargo of poisoned choc... |
404,709 | 2,020,269 | 324,216 | 3 | The Hollywood Chainsaw Massacre | I haven't got that much of an opinion to share about this remake of the legendary Tobe Hooper film . It's rather well-made , fairly gruesome and reasonably tense . The young and inexperienced actors do a pretty convincing job while older veterans like R . Lee Ermey clearly amused themselves in their roles of deranged h... |
405,897 | 2,020,269 | 82,497 | 3 | Oliver Stone should keep his HANDS off the horror genre | All the overenthusiastic movie-junkies who claim that Oliver Stone is a genius and a undeniable master in cinema should watch this early failure and reconsider . Sure , films like Platoon and JFK ( which he directed ) and titles like Midnight Express and Scarface ( which he wrote ) speak to the imagination , but this g... |
405,141 | 2,020,269 | 82,914 | 3 | Woof . . . I mean , Woeful ! | Yvonne De Carlo ( everyone's favorite Munster ) gives away quite a scary and praiseworthy performance as Hester Ramsey , a rancorous and slightly deranged elderly lady who lives alone in a large mansion with her harshly trained Rottweiler Greta . She holds a slight grudge against her family because she's convinced that... |
404,886 | 2,020,269 | 82,933 | 3 | Married ? with Monstrosities ! | This movie is ? ahem ? a bit weird , maybe , and it's plain easy to see right away why it divides audiences into two extreme categories . " Possession " is a textbook example of the so-called " love-it-or-hate-it film " and there's really nothing in between ! On the 1-10 weirdness scale , this movie easily gets a ratin... |
405,277 | 2,020,269 | 67,382 | 3 | Je Ne Comprends Pas . . . | The one-line summary of this review is French , translates itself as " I don't understand " and actually refers to several aspects of this film ? I read several articles where acclaimed critics and fellow directors reward Réné Clément with the title of " the French Hitchcock " . I sincerely hope they didn't base this r... |
406,075 | 2,020,269 | 249,380 | 3 | Naughty French girls ? big deal ! | I never really understood the controversy and hype this movie caused . Especially in French and the neighboring countries ( in Belgium , where I am located , for example ) , " Baise-Moi " was announced as THE most shocking and THE most thought-provoking social drama you could ever experience . Yeah right ! It might be ... |
406,528 | 2,020,269 | 75,113 | 3 | I wish I got drunk BEFORE watching this film . . . | What happens when a big-shot film producer like Dino De Laurentiis orders to take a low-budget production like " Queen Kong " out of circulation , supposedly because it discredits his own remake of the classic 1933 film ? That's right , " Queen Kong " immediately became an immense cult-hit and probably a lot more popul... |
404,876 | 2,020,269 | 296,042 | 3 | Ichi , the Killer . . . not at all impressed . | I know many people think that the violent and gore movies coming from Japan are the best thing since sliced bread , but frankly . . . I don't share that opinion . At least not when it comes to Ichi The Killer ( popular American release title ) This film is way overrated and can easily be skipped . Not like Battle Royal... |
404,779 | 2,020,269 | 257,106 | 3 | A very poor and lackluster effort . | The unexpected success of " Scary Movie " demanded an immediate sequel and all the Wayans ' brothers could come up with was this uninspired , irritating story that ( attempts to ) spoof Haunted House horror films such as the " House on Haunted Hill " , " Poltergeist " and " the Haunting " . Part two was released only a... |
405,979 | 2,020,269 | 595,624 | 3 | Déjà-vu from the Grave | The eleventh installment in Hammer's House of Horror series sadly suffers from a severe lack of originality as well as an incoherent script that leaves open too much space for plot holes and unanswered questions . Director Peter Sasdy ( " Nothing But the Night " , " Taste the Blood of Dracula " ) creates some effective... |
404,352 | 2,020,269 | 923,683 | 3 | The unpleasant return of a depraved maniac | I love ? and I do really mean LOVE ? horror movies and I will always defend my favorite genre against prudish and prejudiced people who keep on claiming it's an overall unintelligent and superfluous type of cinema . Of course , it's very difficult to safeguard a genre and to hold a plea about its strong points when the... |
405,100 | 2,020,269 | 280,969 | 3 | I spy with my little eye something that begins with . . . bullocks ! | I've wasted yet another precious hour and a half of my life by watching this film and I can only blame myself . I despise the reality-TV concept of series like " Big Brother " and I totally hated " The Blair Witch Project " . So what was I thinking renting a movie that combines the main elements of both formats ? ? " M... |
404,611 | 2,020,269 | 64,393 | 3 | Truly a hilarious experience . . . | Oh , man . . . . I finished watching this movie a couple of hours ago and I'm still laughing hysterically when I think about it . This movie is so bad that it becomes an undeniable must for everyone who's into bad cinema . The worst possible cinema actually , this is stuff like Edward D . Wood made it . Of course , I s... |
405,592 | 2,020,269 | 67,511 | 3 | Cold Eyes . . . Wide Shut ! | Dull and truly disappointing early 70's Italian film that can never seem to decide whether it wants to be a typical giallo or an ordinary crime thriller . The opening is very promising , showing a girl assaulted by a man with a knife whose face we do not see , but that quickly turns out to be a totally unrelated theate... |
406,581 | 2,020,269 | 82,782 | 3 | Love hurts . . . like a pick-axe through the heart ! | Well it was inevitable , I guess ? After the most obvious calendar days got turned into easy and highly profitable slasher horror movies ( " Halloween " , " Black Christmas " , " New Year's Evil " , " Happy Birthday to Me " , " Friday the 13th " ? ) , the uninspired scriptwriters rapidly moved on to fake and stupid hol... |
405,916 | 2,020,269 | 24,787 | 3 | Paltry but clever 30's thriller | Most of these 30's thrillers / murder mysteries have been forgotten by now because , let's face it , they haven't got much to offer apart from ? occasionally ? a good story . This little film has a very decent story , fluently written dialogues and some really adequate acting performances , yet it simple can't be calle... |
406,564 | 2,020,269 | 90,849 | 3 | They don't need no education ? | Typical Troma-trash , this smutty 80's flick is considered one of the " highlights " of Lloyd Kaufman's notorious production studio , alongside " The Toxic Avenger " released one year earlier . " The Toxic Avenger " is far superior if you ask me , but this demented splatter-flick is nevertheless endurable as well ; jus... |
405,951 | 2,020,269 | 82,083 | 3 | John Saxon makes this a worthy horror viewing | Blood Beach certainly isn't a good film , but it stands for nicely cheap and cheesy horror fun . It's an early 80's horror flick , so you pretty much know what to expect . A plot line that somewhat rips off an earlier made classic horror movie ( in this case : Jaws ) , lots of screaming girls , tension few to none and ... |
405,204 | 2,020,269 | 335,345 | 3 | Jesus Christ , super-sufferer ! | All my life , people are looking weird at me for liking vicious and violent exploitation cinema that shows explicit torturing and pain ! Now , all of a sudden , this is brilliant filmmaking just because the famous Mel Gibson made a controversial and offensive film ? ? ? The Passion of the Christ is nothing but a bombas... |
406,452 | 2,020,269 | 55,902 | 3 | The Satanic Cult of Hypnotizing Dolls and Blond Spinsters ! | The Devil's Hand is a truly bizarre little horror movie . It's very short and to the point ? But what a point ! Supernatural themes , romantic love triangles and voodoo ! That's all pretty courageous and ambitious for a low-budget horror effort from that time . Too bad it eventually didn't turn out to be a very good ... |
405,595 | 2,020,269 | 82,133 | 3 | Some stories are better left . . . untold | I'm probably one of the few people in the world who don't automatically categorize Joe D'Amato's film as ' worthless ' or ' sleazy junk ' . No , I actually support the opinion that he's a filmmaker with vision . With films like ' Buried Alive ' , ' Death Smiles at Murder ' and ' Emanuelle and the Last Cannibals ' he pr... |
405,266 | 2,020,269 | 90,788 | 3 | Stick with the Cannibals , Ruggero . . . | Rugero Deodato , not particularly known for his subtle art of film-making ( Cannibal Holocaust , anyone ? ? ) , picks in on the popular 80's trend of slashers ? Quickly produced horror films , preferably without a plot , in which horny and stupid looking teens are slaughtered by the dozen . For the vicious cult-directo... |
405,917 | 2,020,269 | 365,677 | 3 | The umpteenth bad shark movie | What's with all these stupid but fancy looking made-for-TV shark movies these days ? Only a couple weeks ago , I watched something awful called " Spring Break Shark Attack " in which a troop of sharks eat some college bikinis , and here's another one already , this time set in the swamps and revolving on a bull shark .... |
406,318 | 2,020,269 | 828,745 | 3 | All Talk , No Serial Killing ? | The very first episode already made clear " Dexter " definitely wouldn't become the greatest show on television ever , but at least it had several things going for it . Michael C . Hall is a terrific actor , there was a lot of blood and gory set-pieces and it had cynical humor and a seemingly fascinating ongoing search... |
404,906 | 2,020,269 | 95,063 | 3 | High on ambition . . . low on results | The last thing you expect from a low-budget 80's horror film with the word ' demon ' in its title is complexity and confusion , and yet all you get from " Dream Demon " is complexity and confusion . This British production tries to be more intelligent than the classic it obviously imitates ( Nightmare on Elm Street ) w... |
405,428 | 2,020,269 | 59,878 | 3 | Let's DANCE ! | What's the first thing to do when you and seven other friends crash your car into a road block and you're stuck in the mud ? Well , you DANCE ! What's your first reaction when you're attending a rock concert and all of a sudden two gigantically over-sized ducks come waddling in ? You start DANCING , of course . What's ... |
405,169 | 2,020,269 | 79,777 | 3 | Civilisation is extinct , only boredom remained . | Apparently there are good reasons for this film's obscurity status as well as for the low rating on this wondrous website . Richard Harris doesn't nearly whoop as much butt as I expected in this overall dull and completely unmemorable post-apocalyptic Sci-Fi feature from the late 70's . The one strong point this movie ... |
404,864 | 2,020,269 | 303,929 | 4 | Passable straight-to-video horror | After the events in " Ascension " , Dracula returns to home sweet home Romania with the beautiful Elizabeth being one of his new bloodsucking brides . The country is torn apart by war , Dracuala's minions are everywhere and yet Father Uffizi and his comic relief sidekick Luke are determined to reach the vampire's castl... |
406,378 | 2,020,269 | 118,643 | 4 | Gabriel : The Terminating Angel | Everybody knows that Gregory Widen's original " The Prophecy " didn't really require a sequel , but you also don't need a degree in rocket science hanging above your chimney to realize that further cash-ins on this profitable horror concept were inevitable . Part two is a very prototypic example of a straight-to-video ... |
406,058 | 2,020,269 | 118,615 | 4 | Big Snake Yawn . | It's pretty damn difficult to impress even the most enthusiast and undemanding horror audiences with a 40 ft . long animatronic snake that ? apart from looking silly ? also screams at its victims . And yet , strangely enough , the CGI effects & visuals are actually the most pleasing aspects to endure whilst watching " ... |
405,952 | 2,020,269 | 73,836 | 4 | Well intended , but painfully bad " revenge " - rip off . . . | Well , I was planning to provide this review with the title " Last Train on the Left " but that seems to be a pretty obvious choice . Nighttrain Murders tries to pick in on the success of Wes Craven's milestone as close as possible . They even managed to find a main villain resembling David Hess , who played the mercil... |
405,918 | 2,020,269 | 83,658 | 4 | The Future is mean , ugly . . . and rather dull . | Well , I guess I must have totally missed the point again . . . I did not see a Sci-Fi masterpiece with astonishingly progressive visual effects and a flawlessly adapted screenplay , but an over-ambitious and difficult to digest drama epic with a lack of action . But hey , " Blade Runner " is ranked pretty high in the ... |
404,669 | 2,020,269 | 493,404 | 4 | A few good ideas , but overall pretentious and dull . . . | The horror genre's extreme boost in popularity since the year 2000 has resulted in quite a couple of annoying trends . There's the numerous amount of pointless remakes , naturally , but also a nearly immeasurable increase in straight-to-video and intolerably cheap & cheesy B-movies released by brand new and supposedly ... |
405,774 | 2,020,269 | 35,318 | 4 | Elementary disappointing . | The title refers to a Nazi-broadcaster who petrifies the inhabitants of London with his drivel about the Third Reich and the annunciations of terrorist actions . The defense council hires Sherlock Holmes to discover the identity of vicious radio DJ but , of course , our brilliant detective unravels a lot more , like po... |
406,644 | 2,020,269 | 118,541 | 4 | The oldest gag in comedy refurnished into a fairly entertaining film . | The luggage of mobster delivery boy Tommy ( Joe Pesci ) , carrying 8 human heads , gets mixed up at the airport with the luggage of medical student Charlie who's on a vacation in Mexico to first meet his future parents-in-law . Tommy desperately needs his mob-hit proof back and Charlie already has a hard time making a ... |
406,576 | 2,020,269 | 171,089 | 4 | Brazilian Ultra - , Mega - , Super-Sleaze ! | My oh my , Oswaldo de Oliveira must have had the time of his life whilst filming this ultimately depraved and sleaze-laden Women In Prison classic . There are almost no men involved in this production and all the female stars ? with the notable exception of the nasty lunch-lady ? are stunningly ravishing wenches . Easi... |
405,407 | 2,020,269 | 78,330 | 4 | Aaargh , it's Fran Drescher ! ! Kill it ! Kill it ! | Any horror movie starring Fran Drescher sounds petrifying to me , I don't care whether she stars as the supreme witch of a coven or simply appears in an insignificant supportive role . Growing up with a sister who insisted on watching that stupid show " The Nanny " over and over again , I've come to dread this unholy w... |
405,810 | 2,020,269 | 337,949 | 4 | Sickening amateur-trash ! | What an absolutely repulsive , shameless and thoroughly depraved short movie this is ! I've been a fan of horror and cult-cinema my entire life , yet I have never encountered something this demented and ? sadly ? pointlessly exploitative . Sick puppy Joe Christ ( who apparently ran for Governor of Texas once ) entirely... |
405,610 | 2,020,269 | 38,934 | 4 | The girl who cried ? . Lycantrophus | The serious lack of originality in " She-Wolf of London " almost causes you to think that the horror genre was already going downhill in the 1940's ! This is an adequately put together movie with a handful of atmospheric moments and decent acting performances , yet the plot-twists and climax are so transparent that the... |
404,542 | 2,020,269 | 424,855 | 4 | Not that bloody and definitely not that " deep " . . . | I had really hoped to come here with the announcement that the slasher sub-genre is NOT dead ? That there still are enthusiast young directors with bright ideas and a passion for vicious gore or insane plot twists . " Blood Deep " surely looked like such a promising new horror project but , alas , it disappoints . The ... |
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