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Did you leave academia? What was it like realising it wasn’t for you? Disclaimer, I’m having a little bit of a breakdown right now so that probably biases me a bit. I wanted to be a research scientist in a lab for a long time. I overcame a lot of obstacles and now I’m part of a cancer research lab at an amazing institute, it’s a real privilege to be there. My thesis is due in January. About a year ago I realised maybe research isn’t for me after all, and I have been really struggling with it. I feel like a failure, I feel unfaithful to everyone who has helped me or mentored me, for thinking that after all this time and effort I’ve discovered that maybe I don’t actually want to be a scientist after all. I am not afraid of hard work, when it is my passion. But I don’t think cancer/research is my true passion. And I feel horrible for wishing my degree was over so I could leave this all behind… when I know it’s a huge privilege to be able to get an education and work in such an important field. Like did I just waste my and everyone else’s time and money? After all the effort to learn how to be a cancer researcher, my heart tells me it’s not happy and I wish I was doing something else. I feel horrible about it. Any advice is welcome… thank you and I’m so sorry for the negativity. | 9709f716bd8cccbdc9901daccf854352aa66f841fa9c51d434df7cd2b7d8ba41 | [
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Did you leave academia? What was it like realising it wasn’t for you? Disclaimer, I’m having a little bit of a breakdown right now so that probably biases me a bit. I wanted to be a research scientist in a lab for a long time. I overcame a lot of obstacles and now I’m part of a cancer research lab at an amazing institute, it’s a real privilege to be there. My thesis is due in January. About a year ago I realised maybe research isn’t for me after all, and I have been really struggling with it. I feel like a failure, I feel unfaithful to everyone who has helped me or mentored me, for thinking that after all this time and effort I’ve discovered that maybe I don’t actually want to be a scientist after all. I am not afraid of hard work, when it is my passion. But I don’t think cancer/research is my true passion. And I feel horrible for wishing my degree was over so I could leave this all behind… when I know it’s a huge privilege to be able to get an education and work in such an important field. Like did I just waste my and everyone else’s time and money? After all the effort to learn how to be a cancer researcher, my heart tells me it’s not happy and I wish I was doing something else. I feel horrible about it. Any advice is welcome… thank you and I’m so sorry for the negativity. | 9709f716bd8cccbdc9901daccf854352aa66f841fa9c51d434df7cd2b7d8ba41 | [
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Did you leave academia? What was it like realising it wasn’t for you? Disclaimer, I’m having a little bit of a breakdown right now so that probably biases me a bit. I wanted to be a research scientist in a lab for a long time. I overcame a lot of obstacles and now I’m part of a cancer research lab at an amazing institute, it’s a real privilege to be there. My thesis is due in January. About a year ago I realised maybe research isn’t for me after all, and I have been really struggling with it. I feel like a failure, I feel unfaithful to everyone who has helped me or mentored me, for thinking that after all this time and effort I’ve discovered that maybe I don’t actually want to be a scientist after all. I am not afraid of hard work, when it is my passion. But I don’t think cancer/research is my true passion. And I feel horrible for wishing my degree was over so I could leave this all behind… when I know it’s a huge privilege to be able to get an education and work in such an important field. Like did I just waste my and everyone else’s time and money? After all the effort to learn how to be a cancer researcher, my heart tells me it’s not happy and I wish I was doing something else. I feel horrible about it. Any advice is welcome… thank you and I’m so sorry for the negativity. | 9709f716bd8cccbdc9901daccf854352aa66f841fa9c51d434df7cd2b7d8ba41 | [
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Did you leave academia? What was it like realising it wasn’t for you? Disclaimer, I’m having a little bit of a breakdown right now so that probably biases me a bit. I wanted to be a research scientist in a lab for a long time. I overcame a lot of obstacles and now I’m part of a cancer research lab at an amazing institute, it’s a real privilege to be there. My thesis is due in January. About a year ago I realised maybe research isn’t for me after all, and I have been really struggling with it. I feel like a failure, I feel unfaithful to everyone who has helped me or mentored me, for thinking that after all this time and effort I’ve discovered that maybe I don’t actually want to be a scientist after all. I am not afraid of hard work, when it is my passion. But I don’t think cancer/research is my true passion. And I feel horrible for wishing my degree was over so I could leave this all behind… when I know it’s a huge privilege to be able to get an education and work in such an important field. Like did I just waste my and everyone else’s time and money? After all the effort to learn how to be a cancer researcher, my heart tells me it’s not happy and I wish I was doing something else. I feel horrible about it. Any advice is welcome… thank you and I’m so sorry for the negativity. | 9709f716bd8cccbdc9901daccf854352aa66f841fa9c51d434df7cd2b7d8ba41 | [
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Did you leave academia? What was it like realising it wasn’t for you? Disclaimer, I’m having a little bit of a breakdown right now so that probably biases me a bit. I wanted to be a research scientist in a lab for a long time. I overcame a lot of obstacles and now I’m part of a cancer research lab at an amazing institute, it’s a real privilege to be there. My thesis is due in January. About a year ago I realised maybe research isn’t for me after all, and I have been really struggling with it. I feel like a failure, I feel unfaithful to everyone who has helped me or mentored me, for thinking that after all this time and effort I’ve discovered that maybe I don’t actually want to be a scientist after all. I am not afraid of hard work, when it is my passion. But I don’t think cancer/research is my true passion. And I feel horrible for wishing my degree was over so I could leave this all behind… when I know it’s a huge privilege to be able to get an education and work in such an important field. Like did I just waste my and everyone else’s time and money? After all the effort to learn how to be a cancer researcher, my heart tells me it’s not happy and I wish I was doing something else. I feel horrible about it. Any advice is welcome… thank you and I’m so sorry for the negativity. | 9709f716bd8cccbdc9901daccf854352aa66f841fa9c51d434df7cd2b7d8ba41 | [
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Did you leave academia? What was it like realising it wasn’t for you? Disclaimer, I’m having a little bit of a breakdown right now so that probably biases me a bit. I wanted to be a research scientist in a lab for a long time. I overcame a lot of obstacles and now I’m part of a cancer research lab at an amazing institute, it’s a real privilege to be there. My thesis is due in January. About a year ago I realised maybe research isn’t for me after all, and I have been really struggling with it. I feel like a failure, I feel unfaithful to everyone who has helped me or mentored me, for thinking that after all this time and effort I’ve discovered that maybe I don’t actually want to be a scientist after all. I am not afraid of hard work, when it is my passion. But I don’t think cancer/research is my true passion. And I feel horrible for wishing my degree was over so I could leave this all behind… when I know it’s a huge privilege to be able to get an education and work in such an important field. Like did I just waste my and everyone else’s time and money? After all the effort to learn how to be a cancer researcher, my heart tells me it’s not happy and I wish I was doing something else. I feel horrible about it. Any advice is welcome… thank you and I’m so sorry for the negativity. | 9709f716bd8cccbdc9901daccf854352aa66f841fa9c51d434df7cd2b7d8ba41 | [
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Am I a fool to leave academia? I will preface this by saying I know this is a decision I must make myself for myself, I’m just hoping to hear some of your perspectives. I was lucky to have a great PI and very productive PhD. Academia forever was my goal when I started, so I also worked hard to network and build my mentoring experience and skills. My connections are solid and I feel like I have an ok shot at a professor position (a slight advantage in a very competitive field, that is). Yet, the glow of academia faded once I got pregnant and had my baby. I realize how much the PIs I know think about their work… all the time. The pressure in the early years trying to secure tenure seems huge, and a few have told me they missed out on a lot of family life. I want to love my work but not be consumed by it. I want my child to have my full attention when we’re at home. I don’t think academia is compatible with this. I am staring down the decision of postdoc or biotech industry positions. Leaving academia feels right, but difficult because I worked so hard to be a good candidate, and I feel like once I leave the door is closed. How many of you are working on choosing between industry and academia? Any advice from those who have been through it? | 862352faec6e850d54c773aef96209928ab597552987ea56f091b4a904651aec | [
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Am I a fool to leave academia? I will preface this by saying I know this is a decision I must make myself for myself, I’m just hoping to hear some of your perspectives. I was lucky to have a great PI and very productive PhD. Academia forever was my goal when I started, so I also worked hard to network and build my mentoring experience and skills. My connections are solid and I feel like I have an ok shot at a professor position (a slight advantage in a very competitive field, that is). Yet, the glow of academia faded once I got pregnant and had my baby. I realize how much the PIs I know think about their work… all the time. The pressure in the early years trying to secure tenure seems huge, and a few have told me they missed out on a lot of family life. I want to love my work but not be consumed by it. I want my child to have my full attention when we’re at home. I don’t think academia is compatible with this. I am staring down the decision of postdoc or biotech industry positions. Leaving academia feels right, but difficult because I worked so hard to be a good candidate, and I feel like once I leave the door is closed. How many of you are working on choosing between industry and academia? Any advice from those who have been through it? | 862352faec6e850d54c773aef96209928ab597552987ea56f091b4a904651aec | [
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Am I a fool to leave academia? I will preface this by saying I know this is a decision I must make myself for myself, I’m just hoping to hear some of your perspectives. I was lucky to have a great PI and very productive PhD. Academia forever was my goal when I started, so I also worked hard to network and build my mentoring experience and skills. My connections are solid and I feel like I have an ok shot at a professor position (a slight advantage in a very competitive field, that is). Yet, the glow of academia faded once I got pregnant and had my baby. I realize how much the PIs I know think about their work… all the time. The pressure in the early years trying to secure tenure seems huge, and a few have told me they missed out on a lot of family life. I want to love my work but not be consumed by it. I want my child to have my full attention when we’re at home. I don’t think academia is compatible with this. I am staring down the decision of postdoc or biotech industry positions. Leaving academia feels right, but difficult because I worked so hard to be a good candidate, and I feel like once I leave the door is closed. How many of you are working on choosing between industry and academia? Any advice from those who have been through it? | 862352faec6e850d54c773aef96209928ab597552987ea56f091b4a904651aec | [
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Am I a fool to leave academia? I will preface this by saying I know this is a decision I must make myself for myself, I’m just hoping to hear some of your perspectives. I was lucky to have a great PI and very productive PhD. Academia forever was my goal when I started, so I also worked hard to network and build my mentoring experience and skills. My connections are solid and I feel like I have an ok shot at a professor position (a slight advantage in a very competitive field, that is). Yet, the glow of academia faded once I got pregnant and had my baby. I realize how much the PIs I know think about their work… all the time. The pressure in the early years trying to secure tenure seems huge, and a few have told me they missed out on a lot of family life. I want to love my work but not be consumed by it. I want my child to have my full attention when we’re at home. I don’t think academia is compatible with this. I am staring down the decision of postdoc or biotech industry positions. Leaving academia feels right, but difficult because I worked so hard to be a good candidate, and I feel like once I leave the door is closed. How many of you are working on choosing between industry and academia? Any advice from those who have been through it? | 862352faec6e850d54c773aef96209928ab597552987ea56f091b4a904651aec | [
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Am I a fool to leave academia? I will preface this by saying I know this is a decision I must make myself for myself, I’m just hoping to hear some of your perspectives. I was lucky to have a great PI and very productive PhD. Academia forever was my goal when I started, so I also worked hard to network and build my mentoring experience and skills. My connections are solid and I feel like I have an ok shot at a professor position (a slight advantage in a very competitive field, that is). Yet, the glow of academia faded once I got pregnant and had my baby. I realize how much the PIs I know think about their work… all the time. The pressure in the early years trying to secure tenure seems huge, and a few have told me they missed out on a lot of family life. I want to love my work but not be consumed by it. I want my child to have my full attention when we’re at home. I don’t think academia is compatible with this. I am staring down the decision of postdoc or biotech industry positions. Leaving academia feels right, but difficult because I worked so hard to be a good candidate, and I feel like once I leave the door is closed. How many of you are working on choosing between industry and academia? Any advice from those who have been through it? | 862352faec6e850d54c773aef96209928ab597552987ea56f091b4a904651aec | [
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Am I a fool to leave academia? I will preface this by saying I know this is a decision I must make myself for myself, I’m just hoping to hear some of your perspectives. I was lucky to have a great PI and very productive PhD. Academia forever was my goal when I started, so I also worked hard to network and build my mentoring experience and skills. My connections are solid and I feel like I have an ok shot at a professor position (a slight advantage in a very competitive field, that is). Yet, the glow of academia faded once I got pregnant and had my baby. I realize how much the PIs I know think about their work… all the time. The pressure in the early years trying to secure tenure seems huge, and a few have told me they missed out on a lot of family life. I want to love my work but not be consumed by it. I want my child to have my full attention when we’re at home. I don’t think academia is compatible with this. I am staring down the decision of postdoc or biotech industry positions. Leaving academia feels right, but difficult because I worked so hard to be a good candidate, and I feel like once I leave the door is closed. How many of you are working on choosing between industry and academia? Any advice from those who have been through it? | 862352faec6e850d54c773aef96209928ab597552987ea56f091b4a904651aec | [
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Am I a fool to leave academia? I will preface this by saying I know this is a decision I must make myself for myself, I’m just hoping to hear some of your perspectives. I was lucky to have a great PI and very productive PhD. Academia forever was my goal when I started, so I also worked hard to network and build my mentoring experience and skills. My connections are solid and I feel like I have an ok shot at a professor position (a slight advantage in a very competitive field, that is). Yet, the glow of academia faded once I got pregnant and had my baby. I realize how much the PIs I know think about their work… all the time. The pressure in the early years trying to secure tenure seems huge, and a few have told me they missed out on a lot of family life. I want to love my work but not be consumed by it. I want my child to have my full attention when we’re at home. I don’t think academia is compatible with this. I am staring down the decision of postdoc or biotech industry positions. Leaving academia feels right, but difficult because I worked so hard to be a good candidate, and I feel like once I leave the door is closed. How many of you are working on choosing between industry and academia? Any advice from those who have been through it? | 862352faec6e850d54c773aef96209928ab597552987ea56f091b4a904651aec | [
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Am I a fool to leave academia? I will preface this by saying I know this is a decision I must make myself for myself, I’m just hoping to hear some of your perspectives. I was lucky to have a great PI and very productive PhD. Academia forever was my goal when I started, so I also worked hard to network and build my mentoring experience and skills. My connections are solid and I feel like I have an ok shot at a professor position (a slight advantage in a very competitive field, that is). Yet, the glow of academia faded once I got pregnant and had my baby. I realize how much the PIs I know think about their work… all the time. The pressure in the early years trying to secure tenure seems huge, and a few have told me they missed out on a lot of family life. I want to love my work but not be consumed by it. I want my child to have my full attention when we’re at home. I don’t think academia is compatible with this. I am staring down the decision of postdoc or biotech industry positions. Leaving academia feels right, but difficult because I worked so hard to be a good candidate, and I feel like once I leave the door is closed. How many of you are working on choosing between industry and academia? Any advice from those who have been through it? | 862352faec6e850d54c773aef96209928ab597552987ea56f091b4a904651aec | [
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Am I a fool to leave academia? I will preface this by saying I know this is a decision I must make myself for myself, I’m just hoping to hear some of your perspectives. I was lucky to have a great PI and very productive PhD. Academia forever was my goal when I started, so I also worked hard to network and build my mentoring experience and skills. My connections are solid and I feel like I have an ok shot at a professor position (a slight advantage in a very competitive field, that is). Yet, the glow of academia faded once I got pregnant and had my baby. I realize how much the PIs I know think about their work… all the time. The pressure in the early years trying to secure tenure seems huge, and a few have told me they missed out on a lot of family life. I want to love my work but not be consumed by it. I want my child to have my full attention when we’re at home. I don’t think academia is compatible with this. I am staring down the decision of postdoc or biotech industry positions. Leaving academia feels right, but difficult because I worked so hard to be a good candidate, and I feel like once I leave the door is closed. How many of you are working on choosing between industry and academia? Any advice from those who have been through it? | 862352faec6e850d54c773aef96209928ab597552987ea56f091b4a904651aec | [
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Am I a fool to leave academia? I will preface this by saying I know this is a decision I must make myself for myself, I’m just hoping to hear some of your perspectives. I was lucky to have a great PI and very productive PhD. Academia forever was my goal when I started, so I also worked hard to network and build my mentoring experience and skills. My connections are solid and I feel like I have an ok shot at a professor position (a slight advantage in a very competitive field, that is). Yet, the glow of academia faded once I got pregnant and had my baby. I realize how much the PIs I know think about their work… all the time. The pressure in the early years trying to secure tenure seems huge, and a few have told me they missed out on a lot of family life. I want to love my work but not be consumed by it. I want my child to have my full attention when we’re at home. I don’t think academia is compatible with this. I am staring down the decision of postdoc or biotech industry positions. Leaving academia feels right, but difficult because I worked so hard to be a good candidate, and I feel like once I leave the door is closed. How many of you are working on choosing between industry and academia? Any advice from those who have been through it? | 862352faec6e850d54c773aef96209928ab597552987ea56f091b4a904651aec | [
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Am I a fool to leave academia? I will preface this by saying I know this is a decision I must make myself for myself, I’m just hoping to hear some of your perspectives. I was lucky to have a great PI and very productive PhD. Academia forever was my goal when I started, so I also worked hard to network and build my mentoring experience and skills. My connections are solid and I feel like I have an ok shot at a professor position (a slight advantage in a very competitive field, that is). Yet, the glow of academia faded once I got pregnant and had my baby. I realize how much the PIs I know think about their work… all the time. The pressure in the early years trying to secure tenure seems huge, and a few have told me they missed out on a lot of family life. I want to love my work but not be consumed by it. I want my child to have my full attention when we’re at home. I don’t think academia is compatible with this. I am staring down the decision of postdoc or biotech industry positions. Leaving academia feels right, but difficult because I worked so hard to be a good candidate, and I feel like once I leave the door is closed. How many of you are working on choosing between industry and academia? Any advice from those who have been through it? | 862352faec6e850d54c773aef96209928ab597552987ea56f091b4a904651aec | [
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Am I a fool to leave academia? I will preface this by saying I know this is a decision I must make myself for myself, I’m just hoping to hear some of your perspectives. I was lucky to have a great PI and very productive PhD. Academia forever was my goal when I started, so I also worked hard to network and build my mentoring experience and skills. My connections are solid and I feel like I have an ok shot at a professor position (a slight advantage in a very competitive field, that is). Yet, the glow of academia faded once I got pregnant and had my baby. I realize how much the PIs I know think about their work… all the time. The pressure in the early years trying to secure tenure seems huge, and a few have told me they missed out on a lot of family life. I want to love my work but not be consumed by it. I want my child to have my full attention when we’re at home. I don’t think academia is compatible with this. I am staring down the decision of postdoc or biotech industry positions. Leaving academia feels right, but difficult because I worked so hard to be a good candidate, and I feel like once I leave the door is closed. How many of you are working on choosing between industry and academia? Any advice from those who have been through it? | 862352faec6e850d54c773aef96209928ab597552987ea56f091b4a904651aec | [
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Am I a fool to leave academia? I will preface this by saying I know this is a decision I must make myself for myself, I’m just hoping to hear some of your perspectives. I was lucky to have a great PI and very productive PhD. Academia forever was my goal when I started, so I also worked hard to network and build my mentoring experience and skills. My connections are solid and I feel like I have an ok shot at a professor position (a slight advantage in a very competitive field, that is). Yet, the glow of academia faded once I got pregnant and had my baby. I realize how much the PIs I know think about their work… all the time. The pressure in the early years trying to secure tenure seems huge, and a few have told me they missed out on a lot of family life. I want to love my work but not be consumed by it. I want my child to have my full attention when we’re at home. I don’t think academia is compatible with this. I am staring down the decision of postdoc or biotech industry positions. Leaving academia feels right, but difficult because I worked so hard to be a good candidate, and I feel like once I leave the door is closed. How many of you are working on choosing between industry and academia? Any advice from those who have been through it? | 862352faec6e850d54c773aef96209928ab597552987ea56f091b4a904651aec | [
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Am I a fool to leave academia? I will preface this by saying I know this is a decision I must make myself for myself, I’m just hoping to hear some of your perspectives. I was lucky to have a great PI and very productive PhD. Academia forever was my goal when I started, so I also worked hard to network and build my mentoring experience and skills. My connections are solid and I feel like I have an ok shot at a professor position (a slight advantage in a very competitive field, that is). Yet, the glow of academia faded once I got pregnant and had my baby. I realize how much the PIs I know think about their work… all the time. The pressure in the early years trying to secure tenure seems huge, and a few have told me they missed out on a lot of family life. I want to love my work but not be consumed by it. I want my child to have my full attention when we’re at home. I don’t think academia is compatible with this. I am staring down the decision of postdoc or biotech industry positions. Leaving academia feels right, but difficult because I worked so hard to be a good candidate, and I feel like once I leave the door is closed. How many of you are working on choosing between industry and academia? Any advice from those who have been through it? | 862352faec6e850d54c773aef96209928ab597552987ea56f091b4a904651aec | [
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Am I a fool to leave academia? I will preface this by saying I know this is a decision I must make myself for myself, I’m just hoping to hear some of your perspectives. I was lucky to have a great PI and very productive PhD. Academia forever was my goal when I started, so I also worked hard to network and build my mentoring experience and skills. My connections are solid and I feel like I have an ok shot at a professor position (a slight advantage in a very competitive field, that is). Yet, the glow of academia faded once I got pregnant and had my baby. I realize how much the PIs I know think about their work… all the time. The pressure in the early years trying to secure tenure seems huge, and a few have told me they missed out on a lot of family life. I want to love my work but not be consumed by it. I want my child to have my full attention when we’re at home. I don’t think academia is compatible with this. I am staring down the decision of postdoc or biotech industry positions. Leaving academia feels right, but difficult because I worked so hard to be a good candidate, and I feel like once I leave the door is closed. How many of you are working on choosing between industry and academia? Any advice from those who have been through it? | 862352faec6e850d54c773aef96209928ab597552987ea56f091b4a904651aec | [
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Am I a fool to leave academia? I will preface this by saying I know this is a decision I must make myself for myself, I’m just hoping to hear some of your perspectives. I was lucky to have a great PI and very productive PhD. Academia forever was my goal when I started, so I also worked hard to network and build my mentoring experience and skills. My connections are solid and I feel like I have an ok shot at a professor position (a slight advantage in a very competitive field, that is). Yet, the glow of academia faded once I got pregnant and had my baby. I realize how much the PIs I know think about their work… all the time. The pressure in the early years trying to secure tenure seems huge, and a few have told me they missed out on a lot of family life. I want to love my work but not be consumed by it. I want my child to have my full attention when we’re at home. I don’t think academia is compatible with this. I am staring down the decision of postdoc or biotech industry positions. Leaving academia feels right, but difficult because I worked so hard to be a good candidate, and I feel like once I leave the door is closed. How many of you are working on choosing between industry and academia? Any advice from those who have been through it? | 862352faec6e850d54c773aef96209928ab597552987ea56f091b4a904651aec | [
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Am I a fool to leave academia? I will preface this by saying I know this is a decision I must make myself for myself, I’m just hoping to hear some of your perspectives. I was lucky to have a great PI and very productive PhD. Academia forever was my goal when I started, so I also worked hard to network and build my mentoring experience and skills. My connections are solid and I feel like I have an ok shot at a professor position (a slight advantage in a very competitive field, that is). Yet, the glow of academia faded once I got pregnant and had my baby. I realize how much the PIs I know think about their work… all the time. The pressure in the early years trying to secure tenure seems huge, and a few have told me they missed out on a lot of family life. I want to love my work but not be consumed by it. I want my child to have my full attention when we’re at home. I don’t think academia is compatible with this. I am staring down the decision of postdoc or biotech industry positions. Leaving academia feels right, but difficult because I worked so hard to be a good candidate, and I feel like once I leave the door is closed. How many of you are working on choosing between industry and academia? Any advice from those who have been through it? | 862352faec6e850d54c773aef96209928ab597552987ea56f091b4a904651aec | [
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Am I a fool to leave academia? I will preface this by saying I know this is a decision I must make myself for myself, I’m just hoping to hear some of your perspectives. I was lucky to have a great PI and very productive PhD. Academia forever was my goal when I started, so I also worked hard to network and build my mentoring experience and skills. My connections are solid and I feel like I have an ok shot at a professor position (a slight advantage in a very competitive field, that is). Yet, the glow of academia faded once I got pregnant and had my baby. I realize how much the PIs I know think about their work… all the time. The pressure in the early years trying to secure tenure seems huge, and a few have told me they missed out on a lot of family life. I want to love my work but not be consumed by it. I want my child to have my full attention when we’re at home. I don’t think academia is compatible with this. I am staring down the decision of postdoc or biotech industry positions. Leaving academia feels right, but difficult because I worked so hard to be a good candidate, and I feel like once I leave the door is closed. How many of you are working on choosing between industry and academia? Any advice from those who have been through it? | 862352faec6e850d54c773aef96209928ab597552987ea56f091b4a904651aec | [
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Am I a fool to leave academia? I will preface this by saying I know this is a decision I must make myself for myself, I’m just hoping to hear some of your perspectives. I was lucky to have a great PI and very productive PhD. Academia forever was my goal when I started, so I also worked hard to network and build my mentoring experience and skills. My connections are solid and I feel like I have an ok shot at a professor position (a slight advantage in a very competitive field, that is). Yet, the glow of academia faded once I got pregnant and had my baby. I realize how much the PIs I know think about their work… all the time. The pressure in the early years trying to secure tenure seems huge, and a few have told me they missed out on a lot of family life. I want to love my work but not be consumed by it. I want my child to have my full attention when we’re at home. I don’t think academia is compatible with this. I am staring down the decision of postdoc or biotech industry positions. Leaving academia feels right, but difficult because I worked so hard to be a good candidate, and I feel like once I leave the door is closed. How many of you are working on choosing between industry and academia? Any advice from those who have been through it? | 862352faec6e850d54c773aef96209928ab597552987ea56f091b4a904651aec | [
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Am I a fool to leave academia? I will preface this by saying I know this is a decision I must make myself for myself, I’m just hoping to hear some of your perspectives. I was lucky to have a great PI and very productive PhD. Academia forever was my goal when I started, so I also worked hard to network and build my mentoring experience and skills. My connections are solid and I feel like I have an ok shot at a professor position (a slight advantage in a very competitive field, that is). Yet, the glow of academia faded once I got pregnant and had my baby. I realize how much the PIs I know think about their work… all the time. The pressure in the early years trying to secure tenure seems huge, and a few have told me they missed out on a lot of family life. I want to love my work but not be consumed by it. I want my child to have my full attention when we’re at home. I don’t think academia is compatible with this. I am staring down the decision of postdoc or biotech industry positions. Leaving academia feels right, but difficult because I worked so hard to be a good candidate, and I feel like once I leave the door is closed. How many of you are working on choosing between industry and academia? Any advice from those who have been through it? | 862352faec6e850d54c773aef96209928ab597552987ea56f091b4a904651aec | [
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Am I a fool to leave academia? I will preface this by saying I know this is a decision I must make myself for myself, I’m just hoping to hear some of your perspectives. I was lucky to have a great PI and very productive PhD. Academia forever was my goal when I started, so I also worked hard to network and build my mentoring experience and skills. My connections are solid and I feel like I have an ok shot at a professor position (a slight advantage in a very competitive field, that is). Yet, the glow of academia faded once I got pregnant and had my baby. I realize how much the PIs I know think about their work… all the time. The pressure in the early years trying to secure tenure seems huge, and a few have told me they missed out on a lot of family life. I want to love my work but not be consumed by it. I want my child to have my full attention when we’re at home. I don’t think academia is compatible with this. I am staring down the decision of postdoc or biotech industry positions. Leaving academia feels right, but difficult because I worked so hard to be a good candidate, and I feel like once I leave the door is closed. How many of you are working on choosing between industry and academia? Any advice from those who have been through it? | 862352faec6e850d54c773aef96209928ab597552987ea56f091b4a904651aec | [
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Am I a fool to leave academia? I will preface this by saying I know this is a decision I must make myself for myself, I’m just hoping to hear some of your perspectives. I was lucky to have a great PI and very productive PhD. Academia forever was my goal when I started, so I also worked hard to network and build my mentoring experience and skills. My connections are solid and I feel like I have an ok shot at a professor position (a slight advantage in a very competitive field, that is). Yet, the glow of academia faded once I got pregnant and had my baby. I realize how much the PIs I know think about their work… all the time. The pressure in the early years trying to secure tenure seems huge, and a few have told me they missed out on a lot of family life. I want to love my work but not be consumed by it. I want my child to have my full attention when we’re at home. I don’t think academia is compatible with this. I am staring down the decision of postdoc or biotech industry positions. Leaving academia feels right, but difficult because I worked so hard to be a good candidate, and I feel like once I leave the door is closed. How many of you are working on choosing between industry and academia? Any advice from those who have been through it? | 862352faec6e850d54c773aef96209928ab597552987ea56f091b4a904651aec | [
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Leaving academia. Old boss is pissed and despondent. Should I really feel responsible for screwing him over? I'm feeling a little bit gaslit so I'd like to write up a summary of my situation and hear some external opinions from other academics (for what they're worth...). Here is my perspective: I am currently a staff scientist (>PhD-level) in an academic research group. My boss was usually very nice, and often went out of his way to be helpful on a professional and personal level. But he was also a little bit abusive, lied to my face more than once, gaslit me, and didn't really trust me to get work done during the pandemic. I was actually working more than I did pre-pandemic, but my boss didn't believe me. This is partly because my work differs from his, and partly because it is absolutely critical for his research and he needs as much out of me as possible in order for him to make progress. Several months ago I asked him if it was ok to make a minor change in my pandemic work situation, and he said yes. A week or two later he sent me an email asking me for details, I replied with what we agreed to, he forwarded my email to HR, and used that opportunity to crack down and place very strict requirements on my subsequent work situation. So I decided to leave. It took many months, and I did my job diligently (as always) during that time, but eventually I found a company that was excited for me to work there, and I'm excited to start working there as well. The company wants me working there ASAP. I asked if I could have a break between my current job, they said a short break would be ok, but one month was too long. So I told my boss I was leaving, gave the minimum notice my contract requires (more than a week, less than a month), and now my boss is absolutely pissed. He tells me it will take him many months to find a replacement, and asks if I could wait a few months before leaving. That I should have told him I was leaving to let him plan for this. That I was ruining his career. Other things of that nature. I get that it would have been nice to have given him some warning. I wish I felt I could have. But I didn't trust him. I don't think there are many industry jobs out there that will want to hire me and then be ok with waiting several months before I start. And I had no idea if I could even find an industry job in my field that I would have wanted to take. And if I HAD told my boss I wanted to leave, what would have happened? My boss says, ok, I need you to stay here six more months. Then he would have started interviewing candidates, and maybe hired one. Then the clock is really ticking because my boss can't afford to pay for two of me. During the first of those six months I would not have been able to interview anywhere, because no company would be willing to hire me six months out. Maybe 2-3 months from the deadline I could start interviewing. Knowing what I know now, I would have been unemployed for several months. Why should I have taken all the risk? So what do you all think, was I out of line? I know I burned a bridge, and I can never use my current boss as a reference, but I already thought I could never use him as a reference so I don't think this has changed very much except the level of hostility. | 0cb735c8e993552329185a10b9ca1fc18e0654871e3562376439ecc3cc468a8d | [
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Leaving academia. Old boss is pissed and despondent. Should I really feel responsible for screwing him over? I'm feeling a little bit gaslit so I'd like to write up a summary of my situation and hear some external opinions from other academics (for what they're worth...). Here is my perspective: I am currently a staff scientist (>PhD-level) in an academic research group. My boss was usually very nice, and often went out of his way to be helpful on a professional and personal level. But he was also a little bit abusive, lied to my face more than once, gaslit me, and didn't really trust me to get work done during the pandemic. I was actually working more than I did pre-pandemic, but my boss didn't believe me. This is partly because my work differs from his, and partly because it is absolutely critical for his research and he needs as much out of me as possible in order for him to make progress. Several months ago I asked him if it was ok to make a minor change in my pandemic work situation, and he said yes. A week or two later he sent me an email asking me for details, I replied with what we agreed to, he forwarded my email to HR, and used that opportunity to crack down and place very strict requirements on my subsequent work situation. So I decided to leave. It took many months, and I did my job diligently (as always) during that time, but eventually I found a company that was excited for me to work there, and I'm excited to start working there as well. The company wants me working there ASAP. I asked if I could have a break between my current job, they said a short break would be ok, but one month was too long. So I told my boss I was leaving, gave the minimum notice my contract requires (more than a week, less than a month), and now my boss is absolutely pissed. He tells me it will take him many months to find a replacement, and asks if I could wait a few months before leaving. That I should have told him I was leaving to let him plan for this. That I was ruining his career. Other things of that nature. I get that it would have been nice to have given him some warning. I wish I felt I could have. But I didn't trust him. I don't think there are many industry jobs out there that will want to hire me and then be ok with waiting several months before I start. And I had no idea if I could even find an industry job in my field that I would have wanted to take. And if I HAD told my boss I wanted to leave, what would have happened? My boss says, ok, I need you to stay here six more months. Then he would have started interviewing candidates, and maybe hired one. Then the clock is really ticking because my boss can't afford to pay for two of me. During the first of those six months I would not have been able to interview anywhere, because no company would be willing to hire me six months out. Maybe 2-3 months from the deadline I could start interviewing. Knowing what I know now, I would have been unemployed for several months. Why should I have taken all the risk? So what do you all think, was I out of line? I know I burned a bridge, and I can never use my current boss as a reference, but I already thought I could never use him as a reference so I don't think this has changed very much except the level of hostility. | 0cb735c8e993552329185a10b9ca1fc18e0654871e3562376439ecc3cc468a8d | [
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"content": "Leaving academia. Old boss is pissed and despondent. Should I really feel responsible for screwing him over? I'm feeling a little bit gaslit so I'd like to write up a summary of my situation and hear some external opinions from other academics (for what they're worth...). Here is my perspective: ... | 7.692308 | 7.076923 | {
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Leaving academia. Old boss is pissed and despondent. Should I really feel responsible for screwing him over? I'm feeling a little bit gaslit so I'd like to write up a summary of my situation and hear some external opinions from other academics (for what they're worth...). Here is my perspective: I am currently a staff scientist (>PhD-level) in an academic research group. My boss was usually very nice, and often went out of his way to be helpful on a professional and personal level. But he was also a little bit abusive, lied to my face more than once, gaslit me, and didn't really trust me to get work done during the pandemic. I was actually working more than I did pre-pandemic, but my boss didn't believe me. This is partly because my work differs from his, and partly because it is absolutely critical for his research and he needs as much out of me as possible in order for him to make progress. Several months ago I asked him if it was ok to make a minor change in my pandemic work situation, and he said yes. A week or two later he sent me an email asking me for details, I replied with what we agreed to, he forwarded my email to HR, and used that opportunity to crack down and place very strict requirements on my subsequent work situation. So I decided to leave. It took many months, and I did my job diligently (as always) during that time, but eventually I found a company that was excited for me to work there, and I'm excited to start working there as well. The company wants me working there ASAP. I asked if I could have a break between my current job, they said a short break would be ok, but one month was too long. So I told my boss I was leaving, gave the minimum notice my contract requires (more than a week, less than a month), and now my boss is absolutely pissed. He tells me it will take him many months to find a replacement, and asks if I could wait a few months before leaving. That I should have told him I was leaving to let him plan for this. That I was ruining his career. Other things of that nature. I get that it would have been nice to have given him some warning. I wish I felt I could have. But I didn't trust him. I don't think there are many industry jobs out there that will want to hire me and then be ok with waiting several months before I start. And I had no idea if I could even find an industry job in my field that I would have wanted to take. And if I HAD told my boss I wanted to leave, what would have happened? My boss says, ok, I need you to stay here six more months. Then he would have started interviewing candidates, and maybe hired one. Then the clock is really ticking because my boss can't afford to pay for two of me. During the first of those six months I would not have been able to interview anywhere, because no company would be willing to hire me six months out. Maybe 2-3 months from the deadline I could start interviewing. Knowing what I know now, I would have been unemployed for several months. Why should I have taken all the risk? So what do you all think, was I out of line? I know I burned a bridge, and I can never use my current boss as a reference, but I already thought I could never use him as a reference so I don't think this has changed very much except the level of hostility. | 0cb735c8e993552329185a10b9ca1fc18e0654871e3562376439ecc3cc468a8d | [
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Leaving academia. Old boss is pissed and despondent. Should I really feel responsible for screwing him over? I'm feeling a little bit gaslit so I'd like to write up a summary of my situation and hear some external opinions from other academics (for what they're worth...). Here is my perspective: I am currently a staff scientist (>PhD-level) in an academic research group. My boss was usually very nice, and often went out of his way to be helpful on a professional and personal level. But he was also a little bit abusive, lied to my face more than once, gaslit me, and didn't really trust me to get work done during the pandemic. I was actually working more than I did pre-pandemic, but my boss didn't believe me. This is partly because my work differs from his, and partly because it is absolutely critical for his research and he needs as much out of me as possible in order for him to make progress. Several months ago I asked him if it was ok to make a minor change in my pandemic work situation, and he said yes. A week or two later he sent me an email asking me for details, I replied with what we agreed to, he forwarded my email to HR, and used that opportunity to crack down and place very strict requirements on my subsequent work situation. So I decided to leave. It took many months, and I did my job diligently (as always) during that time, but eventually I found a company that was excited for me to work there, and I'm excited to start working there as well. The company wants me working there ASAP. I asked if I could have a break between my current job, they said a short break would be ok, but one month was too long. So I told my boss I was leaving, gave the minimum notice my contract requires (more than a week, less than a month), and now my boss is absolutely pissed. He tells me it will take him many months to find a replacement, and asks if I could wait a few months before leaving. That I should have told him I was leaving to let him plan for this. That I was ruining his career. Other things of that nature. I get that it would have been nice to have given him some warning. I wish I felt I could have. But I didn't trust him. I don't think there are many industry jobs out there that will want to hire me and then be ok with waiting several months before I start. And I had no idea if I could even find an industry job in my field that I would have wanted to take. And if I HAD told my boss I wanted to leave, what would have happened? My boss says, ok, I need you to stay here six more months. Then he would have started interviewing candidates, and maybe hired one. Then the clock is really ticking because my boss can't afford to pay for two of me. During the first of those six months I would not have been able to interview anywhere, because no company would be willing to hire me six months out. Maybe 2-3 months from the deadline I could start interviewing. Knowing what I know now, I would have been unemployed for several months. Why should I have taken all the risk? So what do you all think, was I out of line? I know I burned a bridge, and I can never use my current boss as a reference, but I already thought I could never use him as a reference so I don't think this has changed very much except the level of hostility. | 0cb735c8e993552329185a10b9ca1fc18e0654871e3562376439ecc3cc468a8d | [
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Leaving academia. Old boss is pissed and despondent. Should I really feel responsible for screwing him over? I'm feeling a little bit gaslit so I'd like to write up a summary of my situation and hear some external opinions from other academics (for what they're worth...). Here is my perspective: I am currently a staff scientist (>PhD-level) in an academic research group. My boss was usually very nice, and often went out of his way to be helpful on a professional and personal level. But he was also a little bit abusive, lied to my face more than once, gaslit me, and didn't really trust me to get work done during the pandemic. I was actually working more than I did pre-pandemic, but my boss didn't believe me. This is partly because my work differs from his, and partly because it is absolutely critical for his research and he needs as much out of me as possible in order for him to make progress. Several months ago I asked him if it was ok to make a minor change in my pandemic work situation, and he said yes. A week or two later he sent me an email asking me for details, I replied with what we agreed to, he forwarded my email to HR, and used that opportunity to crack down and place very strict requirements on my subsequent work situation. So I decided to leave. It took many months, and I did my job diligently (as always) during that time, but eventually I found a company that was excited for me to work there, and I'm excited to start working there as well. The company wants me working there ASAP. I asked if I could have a break between my current job, they said a short break would be ok, but one month was too long. So I told my boss I was leaving, gave the minimum notice my contract requires (more than a week, less than a month), and now my boss is absolutely pissed. He tells me it will take him many months to find a replacement, and asks if I could wait a few months before leaving. That I should have told him I was leaving to let him plan for this. That I was ruining his career. Other things of that nature. I get that it would have been nice to have given him some warning. I wish I felt I could have. But I didn't trust him. I don't think there are many industry jobs out there that will want to hire me and then be ok with waiting several months before I start. And I had no idea if I could even find an industry job in my field that I would have wanted to take. And if I HAD told my boss I wanted to leave, what would have happened? My boss says, ok, I need you to stay here six more months. Then he would have started interviewing candidates, and maybe hired one. Then the clock is really ticking because my boss can't afford to pay for two of me. During the first of those six months I would not have been able to interview anywhere, because no company would be willing to hire me six months out. Maybe 2-3 months from the deadline I could start interviewing. Knowing what I know now, I would have been unemployed for several months. Why should I have taken all the risk? So what do you all think, was I out of line? I know I burned a bridge, and I can never use my current boss as a reference, but I already thought I could never use him as a reference so I don't think this has changed very much except the level of hostility. | 0cb735c8e993552329185a10b9ca1fc18e0654871e3562376439ecc3cc468a8d | [
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Leaving academia. Old boss is pissed and despondent. Should I really feel responsible for screwing him over? I'm feeling a little bit gaslit so I'd like to write up a summary of my situation and hear some external opinions from other academics (for what they're worth...). Here is my perspective: I am currently a staff scientist (>PhD-level) in an academic research group. My boss was usually very nice, and often went out of his way to be helpful on a professional and personal level. But he was also a little bit abusive, lied to my face more than once, gaslit me, and didn't really trust me to get work done during the pandemic. I was actually working more than I did pre-pandemic, but my boss didn't believe me. This is partly because my work differs from his, and partly because it is absolutely critical for his research and he needs as much out of me as possible in order for him to make progress. Several months ago I asked him if it was ok to make a minor change in my pandemic work situation, and he said yes. A week or two later he sent me an email asking me for details, I replied with what we agreed to, he forwarded my email to HR, and used that opportunity to crack down and place very strict requirements on my subsequent work situation. So I decided to leave. It took many months, and I did my job diligently (as always) during that time, but eventually I found a company that was excited for me to work there, and I'm excited to start working there as well. The company wants me working there ASAP. I asked if I could have a break between my current job, they said a short break would be ok, but one month was too long. So I told my boss I was leaving, gave the minimum notice my contract requires (more than a week, less than a month), and now my boss is absolutely pissed. He tells me it will take him many months to find a replacement, and asks if I could wait a few months before leaving. That I should have told him I was leaving to let him plan for this. That I was ruining his career. Other things of that nature. I get that it would have been nice to have given him some warning. I wish I felt I could have. But I didn't trust him. I don't think there are many industry jobs out there that will want to hire me and then be ok with waiting several months before I start. And I had no idea if I could even find an industry job in my field that I would have wanted to take. And if I HAD told my boss I wanted to leave, what would have happened? My boss says, ok, I need you to stay here six more months. Then he would have started interviewing candidates, and maybe hired one. Then the clock is really ticking because my boss can't afford to pay for two of me. During the first of those six months I would not have been able to interview anywhere, because no company would be willing to hire me six months out. Maybe 2-3 months from the deadline I could start interviewing. Knowing what I know now, I would have been unemployed for several months. Why should I have taken all the risk? So what do you all think, was I out of line? I know I burned a bridge, and I can never use my current boss as a reference, but I already thought I could never use him as a reference so I don't think this has changed very much except the level of hostility. | 0cb735c8e993552329185a10b9ca1fc18e0654871e3562376439ecc3cc468a8d | [
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"content": "Leaving academia. Old boss is pissed and despondent. Should I really feel responsible for screwing him over? I'm feeling a little bit gaslit so I'd like to write up a summary of my situation and hear some external opinions from other academics (for what they're worth...). Here is my perspective: ... | [
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"content": "Leaving academia. Old boss is pissed and despondent. Should I really feel responsible for screwing him over? I'm feeling a little bit gaslit so I'd like to write up a summary of my situation and hear some external opinions from other academics (for what they're worth...). Here is my perspective: ... | 6.666667 | 2.466667 | {
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Leaving academia. Old boss is pissed and despondent. Should I really feel responsible for screwing him over? I'm feeling a little bit gaslit so I'd like to write up a summary of my situation and hear some external opinions from other academics (for what they're worth...). Here is my perspective: I am currently a staff scientist (>PhD-level) in an academic research group. My boss was usually very nice, and often went out of his way to be helpful on a professional and personal level. But he was also a little bit abusive, lied to my face more than once, gaslit me, and didn't really trust me to get work done during the pandemic. I was actually working more than I did pre-pandemic, but my boss didn't believe me. This is partly because my work differs from his, and partly because it is absolutely critical for his research and he needs as much out of me as possible in order for him to make progress. Several months ago I asked him if it was ok to make a minor change in my pandemic work situation, and he said yes. A week or two later he sent me an email asking me for details, I replied with what we agreed to, he forwarded my email to HR, and used that opportunity to crack down and place very strict requirements on my subsequent work situation. So I decided to leave. It took many months, and I did my job diligently (as always) during that time, but eventually I found a company that was excited for me to work there, and I'm excited to start working there as well. The company wants me working there ASAP. I asked if I could have a break between my current job, they said a short break would be ok, but one month was too long. So I told my boss I was leaving, gave the minimum notice my contract requires (more than a week, less than a month), and now my boss is absolutely pissed. He tells me it will take him many months to find a replacement, and asks if I could wait a few months before leaving. That I should have told him I was leaving to let him plan for this. That I was ruining his career. Other things of that nature. I get that it would have been nice to have given him some warning. I wish I felt I could have. But I didn't trust him. I don't think there are many industry jobs out there that will want to hire me and then be ok with waiting several months before I start. And I had no idea if I could even find an industry job in my field that I would have wanted to take. And if I HAD told my boss I wanted to leave, what would have happened? My boss says, ok, I need you to stay here six more months. Then he would have started interviewing candidates, and maybe hired one. Then the clock is really ticking because my boss can't afford to pay for two of me. During the first of those six months I would not have been able to interview anywhere, because no company would be willing to hire me six months out. Maybe 2-3 months from the deadline I could start interviewing. Knowing what I know now, I would have been unemployed for several months. Why should I have taken all the risk? So what do you all think, was I out of line? I know I burned a bridge, and I can never use my current boss as a reference, but I already thought I could never use him as a reference so I don't think this has changed very much except the level of hostility. | 0cb735c8e993552329185a10b9ca1fc18e0654871e3562376439ecc3cc468a8d | [
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"content": "Leaving academia. Old boss is pissed and despondent. Should I really feel responsible for screwing him over? I'm feeling a little bit gaslit so I'd like to write up a summary of my situation and hear some external opinions from other academics (for what they're worth...). Here is my perspective: ... | [
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"content": "Leaving academia. Old boss is pissed and despondent. Should I really feel responsible for screwing him over? I'm feeling a little bit gaslit so I'd like to write up a summary of my situation and hear some external opinions from other academics (for what they're worth...). Here is my perspective: ... | 6.346154 | 3.846154 | {
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Leaving academia. Old boss is pissed and despondent. Should I really feel responsible for screwing him over? I'm feeling a little bit gaslit so I'd like to write up a summary of my situation and hear some external opinions from other academics (for what they're worth...). Here is my perspective: I am currently a staff scientist (>PhD-level) in an academic research group. My boss was usually very nice, and often went out of his way to be helpful on a professional and personal level. But he was also a little bit abusive, lied to my face more than once, gaslit me, and didn't really trust me to get work done during the pandemic. I was actually working more than I did pre-pandemic, but my boss didn't believe me. This is partly because my work differs from his, and partly because it is absolutely critical for his research and he needs as much out of me as possible in order for him to make progress. Several months ago I asked him if it was ok to make a minor change in my pandemic work situation, and he said yes. A week or two later he sent me an email asking me for details, I replied with what we agreed to, he forwarded my email to HR, and used that opportunity to crack down and place very strict requirements on my subsequent work situation. So I decided to leave. It took many months, and I did my job diligently (as always) during that time, but eventually I found a company that was excited for me to work there, and I'm excited to start working there as well. The company wants me working there ASAP. I asked if I could have a break between my current job, they said a short break would be ok, but one month was too long. So I told my boss I was leaving, gave the minimum notice my contract requires (more than a week, less than a month), and now my boss is absolutely pissed. He tells me it will take him many months to find a replacement, and asks if I could wait a few months before leaving. That I should have told him I was leaving to let him plan for this. That I was ruining his career. Other things of that nature. I get that it would have been nice to have given him some warning. I wish I felt I could have. But I didn't trust him. I don't think there are many industry jobs out there that will want to hire me and then be ok with waiting several months before I start. And I had no idea if I could even find an industry job in my field that I would have wanted to take. And if I HAD told my boss I wanted to leave, what would have happened? My boss says, ok, I need you to stay here six more months. Then he would have started interviewing candidates, and maybe hired one. Then the clock is really ticking because my boss can't afford to pay for two of me. During the first of those six months I would not have been able to interview anywhere, because no company would be willing to hire me six months out. Maybe 2-3 months from the deadline I could start interviewing. Knowing what I know now, I would have been unemployed for several months. Why should I have taken all the risk? So what do you all think, was I out of line? I know I burned a bridge, and I can never use my current boss as a reference, but I already thought I could never use him as a reference so I don't think this has changed very much except the level of hostility. | 0cb735c8e993552329185a10b9ca1fc18e0654871e3562376439ecc3cc468a8d | [
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"content": "Leaving academia. Old boss is pissed and despondent. Should I really feel responsible for screwing him over? I'm feeling a little bit gaslit so I'd like to write up a summary of my situation and hear some external opinions from other academics (for what they're worth...). Here is my perspective: ... | [
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"content": "Leaving academia. Old boss is pissed and despondent. Should I really feel responsible for screwing him over? I'm feeling a little bit gaslit so I'd like to write up a summary of my situation and hear some external opinions from other academics (for what they're worth...). Here is my perspective: ... | [
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"content": "Leaving academia. Old boss is pissed and despondent. Should I really feel responsible for screwing him over? I'm feeling a little bit gaslit so I'd like to write up a summary of my situation and hear some external opinions from other academics (for what they're worth...). Here is my perspective: ... | 6.346154 | 3.146154 | {
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Leaving academia. Old boss is pissed and despondent. Should I really feel responsible for screwing him over? I'm feeling a little bit gaslit so I'd like to write up a summary of my situation and hear some external opinions from other academics (for what they're worth...). Here is my perspective: I am currently a staff scientist (>PhD-level) in an academic research group. My boss was usually very nice, and often went out of his way to be helpful on a professional and personal level. But he was also a little bit abusive, lied to my face more than once, gaslit me, and didn't really trust me to get work done during the pandemic. I was actually working more than I did pre-pandemic, but my boss didn't believe me. This is partly because my work differs from his, and partly because it is absolutely critical for his research and he needs as much out of me as possible in order for him to make progress. Several months ago I asked him if it was ok to make a minor change in my pandemic work situation, and he said yes. A week or two later he sent me an email asking me for details, I replied with what we agreed to, he forwarded my email to HR, and used that opportunity to crack down and place very strict requirements on my subsequent work situation. So I decided to leave. It took many months, and I did my job diligently (as always) during that time, but eventually I found a company that was excited for me to work there, and I'm excited to start working there as well. The company wants me working there ASAP. I asked if I could have a break between my current job, they said a short break would be ok, but one month was too long. So I told my boss I was leaving, gave the minimum notice my contract requires (more than a week, less than a month), and now my boss is absolutely pissed. He tells me it will take him many months to find a replacement, and asks if I could wait a few months before leaving. That I should have told him I was leaving to let him plan for this. That I was ruining his career. Other things of that nature. I get that it would have been nice to have given him some warning. I wish I felt I could have. But I didn't trust him. I don't think there are many industry jobs out there that will want to hire me and then be ok with waiting several months before I start. And I had no idea if I could even find an industry job in my field that I would have wanted to take. And if I HAD told my boss I wanted to leave, what would have happened? My boss says, ok, I need you to stay here six more months. Then he would have started interviewing candidates, and maybe hired one. Then the clock is really ticking because my boss can't afford to pay for two of me. During the first of those six months I would not have been able to interview anywhere, because no company would be willing to hire me six months out. Maybe 2-3 months from the deadline I could start interviewing. Knowing what I know now, I would have been unemployed for several months. Why should I have taken all the risk? So what do you all think, was I out of line? I know I burned a bridge, and I can never use my current boss as a reference, but I already thought I could never use him as a reference so I don't think this has changed very much except the level of hostility. | 0cb735c8e993552329185a10b9ca1fc18e0654871e3562376439ecc3cc468a8d | [
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"content": "Leaving academia. Old boss is pissed and despondent. Should I really feel responsible for screwing him over? I'm feeling a little bit gaslit so I'd like to write up a summary of my situation and hear some external opinions from other academics (for what they're worth...). Here is my perspective: ... | [
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"content": "Leaving academia. Old boss is pissed and despondent. Should I really feel responsible for screwing him over? I'm feeling a little bit gaslit so I'd like to write up a summary of my situation and hear some external opinions from other academics (for what they're worth...). Here is my perspective: ... | 6.217949 | 4.051282 | {
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Leaving academia. Old boss is pissed and despondent. Should I really feel responsible for screwing him over? I'm feeling a little bit gaslit so I'd like to write up a summary of my situation and hear some external opinions from other academics (for what they're worth...). Here is my perspective: I am currently a staff scientist (>PhD-level) in an academic research group. My boss was usually very nice, and often went out of his way to be helpful on a professional and personal level. But he was also a little bit abusive, lied to my face more than once, gaslit me, and didn't really trust me to get work done during the pandemic. I was actually working more than I did pre-pandemic, but my boss didn't believe me. This is partly because my work differs from his, and partly because it is absolutely critical for his research and he needs as much out of me as possible in order for him to make progress. Several months ago I asked him if it was ok to make a minor change in my pandemic work situation, and he said yes. A week or two later he sent me an email asking me for details, I replied with what we agreed to, he forwarded my email to HR, and used that opportunity to crack down and place very strict requirements on my subsequent work situation. So I decided to leave. It took many months, and I did my job diligently (as always) during that time, but eventually I found a company that was excited for me to work there, and I'm excited to start working there as well. The company wants me working there ASAP. I asked if I could have a break between my current job, they said a short break would be ok, but one month was too long. So I told my boss I was leaving, gave the minimum notice my contract requires (more than a week, less than a month), and now my boss is absolutely pissed. He tells me it will take him many months to find a replacement, and asks if I could wait a few months before leaving. That I should have told him I was leaving to let him plan for this. That I was ruining his career. Other things of that nature. I get that it would have been nice to have given him some warning. I wish I felt I could have. But I didn't trust him. I don't think there are many industry jobs out there that will want to hire me and then be ok with waiting several months before I start. And I had no idea if I could even find an industry job in my field that I would have wanted to take. And if I HAD told my boss I wanted to leave, what would have happened? My boss says, ok, I need you to stay here six more months. Then he would have started interviewing candidates, and maybe hired one. Then the clock is really ticking because my boss can't afford to pay for two of me. During the first of those six months I would not have been able to interview anywhere, because no company would be willing to hire me six months out. Maybe 2-3 months from the deadline I could start interviewing. Knowing what I know now, I would have been unemployed for several months. Why should I have taken all the risk? So what do you all think, was I out of line? I know I burned a bridge, and I can never use my current boss as a reference, but I already thought I could never use him as a reference so I don't think this has changed very much except the level of hostility. | 0cb735c8e993552329185a10b9ca1fc18e0654871e3562376439ecc3cc468a8d | [
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"content": "Leaving academia. Old boss is pissed and despondent. Should I really feel responsible for screwing him over? I'm feeling a little bit gaslit so I'd like to write up a summary of my situation and hear some external opinions from other academics (for what they're worth...). Here is my perspective: ... | [
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"content": "Leaving academia. Old boss is pissed and despondent. Should I really feel responsible for screwing him over? I'm feeling a little bit gaslit so I'd like to write up a summary of my situation and hear some external opinions from other academics (for what they're worth...). Here is my perspective: ... | [
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"content": "Leaving academia. Old boss is pissed and despondent. Should I really feel responsible for screwing him over? I'm feeling a little bit gaslit so I'd like to write up a summary of my situation and hear some external opinions from other academics (for what they're worth...). Here is my perspective: ... | 6.217949 | 3.417949 | {
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Leaving academia. Old boss is pissed and despondent. Should I really feel responsible for screwing him over? I'm feeling a little bit gaslit so I'd like to write up a summary of my situation and hear some external opinions from other academics (for what they're worth...). Here is my perspective: I am currently a staff scientist (>PhD-level) in an academic research group. My boss was usually very nice, and often went out of his way to be helpful on a professional and personal level. But he was also a little bit abusive, lied to my face more than once, gaslit me, and didn't really trust me to get work done during the pandemic. I was actually working more than I did pre-pandemic, but my boss didn't believe me. This is partly because my work differs from his, and partly because it is absolutely critical for his research and he needs as much out of me as possible in order for him to make progress. Several months ago I asked him if it was ok to make a minor change in my pandemic work situation, and he said yes. A week or two later he sent me an email asking me for details, I replied with what we agreed to, he forwarded my email to HR, and used that opportunity to crack down and place very strict requirements on my subsequent work situation. So I decided to leave. It took many months, and I did my job diligently (as always) during that time, but eventually I found a company that was excited for me to work there, and I'm excited to start working there as well. The company wants me working there ASAP. I asked if I could have a break between my current job, they said a short break would be ok, but one month was too long. So I told my boss I was leaving, gave the minimum notice my contract requires (more than a week, less than a month), and now my boss is absolutely pissed. He tells me it will take him many months to find a replacement, and asks if I could wait a few months before leaving. That I should have told him I was leaving to let him plan for this. That I was ruining his career. Other things of that nature. I get that it would have been nice to have given him some warning. I wish I felt I could have. But I didn't trust him. I don't think there are many industry jobs out there that will want to hire me and then be ok with waiting several months before I start. And I had no idea if I could even find an industry job in my field that I would have wanted to take. And if I HAD told my boss I wanted to leave, what would have happened? My boss says, ok, I need you to stay here six more months. Then he would have started interviewing candidates, and maybe hired one. Then the clock is really ticking because my boss can't afford to pay for two of me. During the first of those six months I would not have been able to interview anywhere, because no company would be willing to hire me six months out. Maybe 2-3 months from the deadline I could start interviewing. Knowing what I know now, I would have been unemployed for several months. Why should I have taken all the risk? So what do you all think, was I out of line? I know I burned a bridge, and I can never use my current boss as a reference, but I already thought I could never use him as a reference so I don't think this has changed very much except the level of hostility. | 0cb735c8e993552329185a10b9ca1fc18e0654871e3562376439ecc3cc468a8d | [
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"content": "Leaving academia. Old boss is pissed and despondent. Should I really feel responsible for screwing him over? I'm feeling a little bit gaslit so I'd like to write up a summary of my situation and hear some external opinions from other academics (for what they're worth...). Here is my perspective: ... | [
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"content": "Leaving academia. Old boss is pissed and despondent. Should I really feel responsible for screwing him over? I'm feeling a little bit gaslit so I'd like to write up a summary of my situation and hear some external opinions from other academics (for what they're worth...). Here is my perspective: ... | [
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"content": "Leaving academia. Old boss is pissed and despondent. Should I really feel responsible for screwing him over? I'm feeling a little bit gaslit so I'd like to write up a summary of my situation and hear some external opinions from other academics (for what they're worth...). Here is my perspective: ... | 5.641026 | 4.974359 | {
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Leaving academia. Old boss is pissed and despondent. Should I really feel responsible for screwing him over? I'm feeling a little bit gaslit so I'd like to write up a summary of my situation and hear some external opinions from other academics (for what they're worth...). Here is my perspective: I am currently a staff scientist (>PhD-level) in an academic research group. My boss was usually very nice, and often went out of his way to be helpful on a professional and personal level. But he was also a little bit abusive, lied to my face more than once, gaslit me, and didn't really trust me to get work done during the pandemic. I was actually working more than I did pre-pandemic, but my boss didn't believe me. This is partly because my work differs from his, and partly because it is absolutely critical for his research and he needs as much out of me as possible in order for him to make progress. Several months ago I asked him if it was ok to make a minor change in my pandemic work situation, and he said yes. A week or two later he sent me an email asking me for details, I replied with what we agreed to, he forwarded my email to HR, and used that opportunity to crack down and place very strict requirements on my subsequent work situation. So I decided to leave. It took many months, and I did my job diligently (as always) during that time, but eventually I found a company that was excited for me to work there, and I'm excited to start working there as well. The company wants me working there ASAP. I asked if I could have a break between my current job, they said a short break would be ok, but one month was too long. So I told my boss I was leaving, gave the minimum notice my contract requires (more than a week, less than a month), and now my boss is absolutely pissed. He tells me it will take him many months to find a replacement, and asks if I could wait a few months before leaving. That I should have told him I was leaving to let him plan for this. That I was ruining his career. Other things of that nature. I get that it would have been nice to have given him some warning. I wish I felt I could have. But I didn't trust him. I don't think there are many industry jobs out there that will want to hire me and then be ok with waiting several months before I start. And I had no idea if I could even find an industry job in my field that I would have wanted to take. And if I HAD told my boss I wanted to leave, what would have happened? My boss says, ok, I need you to stay here six more months. Then he would have started interviewing candidates, and maybe hired one. Then the clock is really ticking because my boss can't afford to pay for two of me. During the first of those six months I would not have been able to interview anywhere, because no company would be willing to hire me six months out. Maybe 2-3 months from the deadline I could start interviewing. Knowing what I know now, I would have been unemployed for several months. Why should I have taken all the risk? So what do you all think, was I out of line? I know I burned a bridge, and I can never use my current boss as a reference, but I already thought I could never use him as a reference so I don't think this has changed very much except the level of hostility. | 0cb735c8e993552329185a10b9ca1fc18e0654871e3562376439ecc3cc468a8d | [
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Leaving academia. Old boss is pissed and despondent. Should I really feel responsible for screwing him over? I'm feeling a little bit gaslit so I'd like to write up a summary of my situation and hear some external opinions from other academics (for what they're worth...). Here is my perspective: I am currently a staff scientist (>PhD-level) in an academic research group. My boss was usually very nice, and often went out of his way to be helpful on a professional and personal level. But he was also a little bit abusive, lied to my face more than once, gaslit me, and didn't really trust me to get work done during the pandemic. I was actually working more than I did pre-pandemic, but my boss didn't believe me. This is partly because my work differs from his, and partly because it is absolutely critical for his research and he needs as much out of me as possible in order for him to make progress. Several months ago I asked him if it was ok to make a minor change in my pandemic work situation, and he said yes. A week or two later he sent me an email asking me for details, I replied with what we agreed to, he forwarded my email to HR, and used that opportunity to crack down and place very strict requirements on my subsequent work situation. So I decided to leave. It took many months, and I did my job diligently (as always) during that time, but eventually I found a company that was excited for me to work there, and I'm excited to start working there as well. The company wants me working there ASAP. I asked if I could have a break between my current job, they said a short break would be ok, but one month was too long. So I told my boss I was leaving, gave the minimum notice my contract requires (more than a week, less than a month), and now my boss is absolutely pissed. He tells me it will take him many months to find a replacement, and asks if I could wait a few months before leaving. That I should have told him I was leaving to let him plan for this. That I was ruining his career. Other things of that nature. I get that it would have been nice to have given him some warning. I wish I felt I could have. But I didn't trust him. I don't think there are many industry jobs out there that will want to hire me and then be ok with waiting several months before I start. And I had no idea if I could even find an industry job in my field that I would have wanted to take. And if I HAD told my boss I wanted to leave, what would have happened? My boss says, ok, I need you to stay here six more months. Then he would have started interviewing candidates, and maybe hired one. Then the clock is really ticking because my boss can't afford to pay for two of me. During the first of those six months I would not have been able to interview anywhere, because no company would be willing to hire me six months out. Maybe 2-3 months from the deadline I could start interviewing. Knowing what I know now, I would have been unemployed for several months. Why should I have taken all the risk? So what do you all think, was I out of line? I know I burned a bridge, and I can never use my current boss as a reference, but I already thought I could never use him as a reference so I don't think this has changed very much except the level of hostility. | 0cb735c8e993552329185a10b9ca1fc18e0654871e3562376439ecc3cc468a8d | [
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"content": "Leaving academia. Old boss is pissed and despondent. Should I really feel responsible for screwing him over? I'm feeling a little bit gaslit so I'd like to write up a summary of my situation and hear some external opinions from other academics (for what they're worth...). Here is my perspective: ... | [
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"content": "Leaving academia. Old boss is pissed and despondent. Should I really feel responsible for screwing him over? I'm feeling a little bit gaslit so I'd like to write up a summary of my situation and hear some external opinions from other academics (for what they're worth...). Here is my perspective: ... | 5.576923 | 5.076923 | {
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Leaving academia. Old boss is pissed and despondent. Should I really feel responsible for screwing him over? I'm feeling a little bit gaslit so I'd like to write up a summary of my situation and hear some external opinions from other academics (for what they're worth...). Here is my perspective: I am currently a staff scientist (>PhD-level) in an academic research group. My boss was usually very nice, and often went out of his way to be helpful on a professional and personal level. But he was also a little bit abusive, lied to my face more than once, gaslit me, and didn't really trust me to get work done during the pandemic. I was actually working more than I did pre-pandemic, but my boss didn't believe me. This is partly because my work differs from his, and partly because it is absolutely critical for his research and he needs as much out of me as possible in order for him to make progress. Several months ago I asked him if it was ok to make a minor change in my pandemic work situation, and he said yes. A week or two later he sent me an email asking me for details, I replied with what we agreed to, he forwarded my email to HR, and used that opportunity to crack down and place very strict requirements on my subsequent work situation. So I decided to leave. It took many months, and I did my job diligently (as always) during that time, but eventually I found a company that was excited for me to work there, and I'm excited to start working there as well. The company wants me working there ASAP. I asked if I could have a break between my current job, they said a short break would be ok, but one month was too long. So I told my boss I was leaving, gave the minimum notice my contract requires (more than a week, less than a month), and now my boss is absolutely pissed. He tells me it will take him many months to find a replacement, and asks if I could wait a few months before leaving. That I should have told him I was leaving to let him plan for this. That I was ruining his career. Other things of that nature. I get that it would have been nice to have given him some warning. I wish I felt I could have. But I didn't trust him. I don't think there are many industry jobs out there that will want to hire me and then be ok with waiting several months before I start. And I had no idea if I could even find an industry job in my field that I would have wanted to take. And if I HAD told my boss I wanted to leave, what would have happened? My boss says, ok, I need you to stay here six more months. Then he would have started interviewing candidates, and maybe hired one. Then the clock is really ticking because my boss can't afford to pay for two of me. During the first of those six months I would not have been able to interview anywhere, because no company would be willing to hire me six months out. Maybe 2-3 months from the deadline I could start interviewing. Knowing what I know now, I would have been unemployed for several months. Why should I have taken all the risk? So what do you all think, was I out of line? I know I burned a bridge, and I can never use my current boss as a reference, but I already thought I could never use him as a reference so I don't think this has changed very much except the level of hostility. | 0cb735c8e993552329185a10b9ca1fc18e0654871e3562376439ecc3cc468a8d | [
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"content": "Leaving academia. Old boss is pissed and despondent. Should I really feel responsible for screwing him over? I'm feeling a little bit gaslit so I'd like to write up a summary of my situation and hear some external opinions from other academics (for what they're worth...). Here is my perspective: ... | [
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"content": "Leaving academia. Old boss is pissed and despondent. Should I really feel responsible for screwing him over? I'm feeling a little bit gaslit so I'd like to write up a summary of my situation and hear some external opinions from other academics (for what they're worth...). Here is my perspective: ... | 5.576923 | 5.076923 | {
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Leaving academia. Old boss is pissed and despondent. Should I really feel responsible for screwing him over? I'm feeling a little bit gaslit so I'd like to write up a summary of my situation and hear some external opinions from other academics (for what they're worth...). Here is my perspective: I am currently a staff scientist (>PhD-level) in an academic research group. My boss was usually very nice, and often went out of his way to be helpful on a professional and personal level. But he was also a little bit abusive, lied to my face more than once, gaslit me, and didn't really trust me to get work done during the pandemic. I was actually working more than I did pre-pandemic, but my boss didn't believe me. This is partly because my work differs from his, and partly because it is absolutely critical for his research and he needs as much out of me as possible in order for him to make progress. Several months ago I asked him if it was ok to make a minor change in my pandemic work situation, and he said yes. A week or two later he sent me an email asking me for details, I replied with what we agreed to, he forwarded my email to HR, and used that opportunity to crack down and place very strict requirements on my subsequent work situation. So I decided to leave. It took many months, and I did my job diligently (as always) during that time, but eventually I found a company that was excited for me to work there, and I'm excited to start working there as well. The company wants me working there ASAP. I asked if I could have a break between my current job, they said a short break would be ok, but one month was too long. So I told my boss I was leaving, gave the minimum notice my contract requires (more than a week, less than a month), and now my boss is absolutely pissed. He tells me it will take him many months to find a replacement, and asks if I could wait a few months before leaving. That I should have told him I was leaving to let him plan for this. That I was ruining his career. Other things of that nature. I get that it would have been nice to have given him some warning. I wish I felt I could have. But I didn't trust him. I don't think there are many industry jobs out there that will want to hire me and then be ok with waiting several months before I start. And I had no idea if I could even find an industry job in my field that I would have wanted to take. And if I HAD told my boss I wanted to leave, what would have happened? My boss says, ok, I need you to stay here six more months. Then he would have started interviewing candidates, and maybe hired one. Then the clock is really ticking because my boss can't afford to pay for two of me. During the first of those six months I would not have been able to interview anywhere, because no company would be willing to hire me six months out. Maybe 2-3 months from the deadline I could start interviewing. Knowing what I know now, I would have been unemployed for several months. Why should I have taken all the risk? So what do you all think, was I out of line? I know I burned a bridge, and I can never use my current boss as a reference, but I already thought I could never use him as a reference so I don't think this has changed very much except the level of hostility. | 0cb735c8e993552329185a10b9ca1fc18e0654871e3562376439ecc3cc468a8d | [
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"content": "Leaving academia. Old boss is pissed and despondent. Should I really feel responsible for screwing him over? I'm feeling a little bit gaslit so I'd like to write up a summary of my situation and hear some external opinions from other academics (for what they're worth...). Here is my perspective: ... | [
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"content": "Leaving academia. Old boss is pissed and despondent. Should I really feel responsible for screwing him over? I'm feeling a little bit gaslit so I'd like to write up a summary of my situation and hear some external opinions from other academics (for what they're worth...). Here is my perspective: ... | [
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"content": "Leaving academia. Old boss is pissed and despondent. Should I really feel responsible for screwing him over? I'm feeling a little bit gaslit so I'd like to write up a summary of my situation and hear some external opinions from other academics (for what they're worth...). Here is my perspective: ... | 5.576923 | 4.776923 | {
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Leaving academia. Old boss is pissed and despondent. Should I really feel responsible for screwing him over? I'm feeling a little bit gaslit so I'd like to write up a summary of my situation and hear some external opinions from other academics (for what they're worth...). Here is my perspective: I am currently a staff scientist (>PhD-level) in an academic research group. My boss was usually very nice, and often went out of his way to be helpful on a professional and personal level. But he was also a little bit abusive, lied to my face more than once, gaslit me, and didn't really trust me to get work done during the pandemic. I was actually working more than I did pre-pandemic, but my boss didn't believe me. This is partly because my work differs from his, and partly because it is absolutely critical for his research and he needs as much out of me as possible in order for him to make progress. Several months ago I asked him if it was ok to make a minor change in my pandemic work situation, and he said yes. A week or two later he sent me an email asking me for details, I replied with what we agreed to, he forwarded my email to HR, and used that opportunity to crack down and place very strict requirements on my subsequent work situation. So I decided to leave. It took many months, and I did my job diligently (as always) during that time, but eventually I found a company that was excited for me to work there, and I'm excited to start working there as well. The company wants me working there ASAP. I asked if I could have a break between my current job, they said a short break would be ok, but one month was too long. So I told my boss I was leaving, gave the minimum notice my contract requires (more than a week, less than a month), and now my boss is absolutely pissed. He tells me it will take him many months to find a replacement, and asks if I could wait a few months before leaving. That I should have told him I was leaving to let him plan for this. That I was ruining his career. Other things of that nature. I get that it would have been nice to have given him some warning. I wish I felt I could have. But I didn't trust him. I don't think there are many industry jobs out there that will want to hire me and then be ok with waiting several months before I start. And I had no idea if I could even find an industry job in my field that I would have wanted to take. And if I HAD told my boss I wanted to leave, what would have happened? My boss says, ok, I need you to stay here six more months. Then he would have started interviewing candidates, and maybe hired one. Then the clock is really ticking because my boss can't afford to pay for two of me. During the first of those six months I would not have been able to interview anywhere, because no company would be willing to hire me six months out. Maybe 2-3 months from the deadline I could start interviewing. Knowing what I know now, I would have been unemployed for several months. Why should I have taken all the risk? So what do you all think, was I out of line? I know I burned a bridge, and I can never use my current boss as a reference, but I already thought I could never use him as a reference so I don't think this has changed very much except the level of hostility. | 0cb735c8e993552329185a10b9ca1fc18e0654871e3562376439ecc3cc468a8d | [
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"content": "Leaving academia. Old boss is pissed and despondent. Should I really feel responsible for screwing him over? I'm feeling a little bit gaslit so I'd like to write up a summary of my situation and hear some external opinions from other academics (for what they're worth...). Here is my perspective: ... | [
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"content": "Leaving academia. Old boss is pissed and despondent. Should I really feel responsible for screwing him over? I'm feeling a little bit gaslit so I'd like to write up a summary of my situation and hear some external opinions from other academics (for what they're worth...). Here is my perspective: ... | 5.384615 | 5.184615 | {
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Leaving academia. Old boss is pissed and despondent. Should I really feel responsible for screwing him over? I'm feeling a little bit gaslit so I'd like to write up a summary of my situation and hear some external opinions from other academics (for what they're worth...). Here is my perspective: I am currently a staff scientist (>PhD-level) in an academic research group. My boss was usually very nice, and often went out of his way to be helpful on a professional and personal level. But he was also a little bit abusive, lied to my face more than once, gaslit me, and didn't really trust me to get work done during the pandemic. I was actually working more than I did pre-pandemic, but my boss didn't believe me. This is partly because my work differs from his, and partly because it is absolutely critical for his research and he needs as much out of me as possible in order for him to make progress. Several months ago I asked him if it was ok to make a minor change in my pandemic work situation, and he said yes. A week or two later he sent me an email asking me for details, I replied with what we agreed to, he forwarded my email to HR, and used that opportunity to crack down and place very strict requirements on my subsequent work situation. So I decided to leave. It took many months, and I did my job diligently (as always) during that time, but eventually I found a company that was excited for me to work there, and I'm excited to start working there as well. The company wants me working there ASAP. I asked if I could have a break between my current job, they said a short break would be ok, but one month was too long. So I told my boss I was leaving, gave the minimum notice my contract requires (more than a week, less than a month), and now my boss is absolutely pissed. He tells me it will take him many months to find a replacement, and asks if I could wait a few months before leaving. That I should have told him I was leaving to let him plan for this. That I was ruining his career. Other things of that nature. I get that it would have been nice to have given him some warning. I wish I felt I could have. But I didn't trust him. I don't think there are many industry jobs out there that will want to hire me and then be ok with waiting several months before I start. And I had no idea if I could even find an industry job in my field that I would have wanted to take. And if I HAD told my boss I wanted to leave, what would have happened? My boss says, ok, I need you to stay here six more months. Then he would have started interviewing candidates, and maybe hired one. Then the clock is really ticking because my boss can't afford to pay for two of me. During the first of those six months I would not have been able to interview anywhere, because no company would be willing to hire me six months out. Maybe 2-3 months from the deadline I could start interviewing. Knowing what I know now, I would have been unemployed for several months. Why should I have taken all the risk? So what do you all think, was I out of line? I know I burned a bridge, and I can never use my current boss as a reference, but I already thought I could never use him as a reference so I don't think this has changed very much except the level of hostility. | 0cb735c8e993552329185a10b9ca1fc18e0654871e3562376439ecc3cc468a8d | [
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"content": "Leaving academia. Old boss is pissed and despondent. Should I really feel responsible for screwing him over? I'm feeling a little bit gaslit so I'd like to write up a summary of my situation and hear some external opinions from other academics (for what they're worth...). Here is my perspective: ... | [
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"content": "Leaving academia. Old boss is pissed and despondent. Should I really feel responsible for screwing him over? I'm feeling a little bit gaslit so I'd like to write up a summary of my situation and hear some external opinions from other academics (for what they're worth...). Here is my perspective: ... | [
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"content": "Leaving academia. Old boss is pissed and despondent. Should I really feel responsible for screwing him over? I'm feeling a little bit gaslit so I'd like to write up a summary of my situation and hear some external opinions from other academics (for what they're worth...). Here is my perspective: ... | 5.384615 | 5.184615 | {
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Leaving academia. Old boss is pissed and despondent. Should I really feel responsible for screwing him over? I'm feeling a little bit gaslit so I'd like to write up a summary of my situation and hear some external opinions from other academics (for what they're worth...). Here is my perspective: I am currently a staff scientist (>PhD-level) in an academic research group. My boss was usually very nice, and often went out of his way to be helpful on a professional and personal level. But he was also a little bit abusive, lied to my face more than once, gaslit me, and didn't really trust me to get work done during the pandemic. I was actually working more than I did pre-pandemic, but my boss didn't believe me. This is partly because my work differs from his, and partly because it is absolutely critical for his research and he needs as much out of me as possible in order for him to make progress. Several months ago I asked him if it was ok to make a minor change in my pandemic work situation, and he said yes. A week or two later he sent me an email asking me for details, I replied with what we agreed to, he forwarded my email to HR, and used that opportunity to crack down and place very strict requirements on my subsequent work situation. So I decided to leave. It took many months, and I did my job diligently (as always) during that time, but eventually I found a company that was excited for me to work there, and I'm excited to start working there as well. The company wants me working there ASAP. I asked if I could have a break between my current job, they said a short break would be ok, but one month was too long. So I told my boss I was leaving, gave the minimum notice my contract requires (more than a week, less than a month), and now my boss is absolutely pissed. He tells me it will take him many months to find a replacement, and asks if I could wait a few months before leaving. That I should have told him I was leaving to let him plan for this. That I was ruining his career. Other things of that nature. I get that it would have been nice to have given him some warning. I wish I felt I could have. But I didn't trust him. I don't think there are many industry jobs out there that will want to hire me and then be ok with waiting several months before I start. And I had no idea if I could even find an industry job in my field that I would have wanted to take. And if I HAD told my boss I wanted to leave, what would have happened? My boss says, ok, I need you to stay here six more months. Then he would have started interviewing candidates, and maybe hired one. Then the clock is really ticking because my boss can't afford to pay for two of me. During the first of those six months I would not have been able to interview anywhere, because no company would be willing to hire me six months out. Maybe 2-3 months from the deadline I could start interviewing. Knowing what I know now, I would have been unemployed for several months. Why should I have taken all the risk? So what do you all think, was I out of line? I know I burned a bridge, and I can never use my current boss as a reference, but I already thought I could never use him as a reference so I don't think this has changed very much except the level of hostility. | 0cb735c8e993552329185a10b9ca1fc18e0654871e3562376439ecc3cc468a8d | [
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"content": "Leaving academia. Old boss is pissed and despondent. Should I really feel responsible for screwing him over? I'm feeling a little bit gaslit so I'd like to write up a summary of my situation and hear some external opinions from other academics (for what they're worth...). Here is my perspective: ... | [
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"content": "Leaving academia. Old boss is pissed and despondent. Should I really feel responsible for screwing him over? I'm feeling a little bit gaslit so I'd like to write up a summary of my situation and hear some external opinions from other academics (for what they're worth...). Here is my perspective: ... | [
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"content": "Leaving academia. Old boss is pissed and despondent. Should I really feel responsible for screwing him over? I'm feeling a little bit gaslit so I'd like to write up a summary of my situation and hear some external opinions from other academics (for what they're worth...). Here is my perspective: ... | 5.384615 | 5.184615 | {
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Leaving academia. Old boss is pissed and despondent. Should I really feel responsible for screwing him over? I'm feeling a little bit gaslit so I'd like to write up a summary of my situation and hear some external opinions from other academics (for what they're worth...). Here is my perspective: I am currently a staff scientist (>PhD-level) in an academic research group. My boss was usually very nice, and often went out of his way to be helpful on a professional and personal level. But he was also a little bit abusive, lied to my face more than once, gaslit me, and didn't really trust me to get work done during the pandemic. I was actually working more than I did pre-pandemic, but my boss didn't believe me. This is partly because my work differs from his, and partly because it is absolutely critical for his research and he needs as much out of me as possible in order for him to make progress. Several months ago I asked him if it was ok to make a minor change in my pandemic work situation, and he said yes. A week or two later he sent me an email asking me for details, I replied with what we agreed to, he forwarded my email to HR, and used that opportunity to crack down and place very strict requirements on my subsequent work situation. So I decided to leave. It took many months, and I did my job diligently (as always) during that time, but eventually I found a company that was excited for me to work there, and I'm excited to start working there as well. The company wants me working there ASAP. I asked if I could have a break between my current job, they said a short break would be ok, but one month was too long. So I told my boss I was leaving, gave the minimum notice my contract requires (more than a week, less than a month), and now my boss is absolutely pissed. He tells me it will take him many months to find a replacement, and asks if I could wait a few months before leaving. That I should have told him I was leaving to let him plan for this. That I was ruining his career. Other things of that nature. I get that it would have been nice to have given him some warning. I wish I felt I could have. But I didn't trust him. I don't think there are many industry jobs out there that will want to hire me and then be ok with waiting several months before I start. And I had no idea if I could even find an industry job in my field that I would have wanted to take. And if I HAD told my boss I wanted to leave, what would have happened? My boss says, ok, I need you to stay here six more months. Then he would have started interviewing candidates, and maybe hired one. Then the clock is really ticking because my boss can't afford to pay for two of me. During the first of those six months I would not have been able to interview anywhere, because no company would be willing to hire me six months out. Maybe 2-3 months from the deadline I could start interviewing. Knowing what I know now, I would have been unemployed for several months. Why should I have taken all the risk? So what do you all think, was I out of line? I know I burned a bridge, and I can never use my current boss as a reference, but I already thought I could never use him as a reference so I don't think this has changed very much except the level of hostility. | 0cb735c8e993552329185a10b9ca1fc18e0654871e3562376439ecc3cc468a8d | [
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Leaving academia. Old boss is pissed and despondent. Should I really feel responsible for screwing him over? I'm feeling a little bit gaslit so I'd like to write up a summary of my situation and hear some external opinions from other academics (for what they're worth...). Here is my perspective: I am currently a staff scientist (>PhD-level) in an academic research group. My boss was usually very nice, and often went out of his way to be helpful on a professional and personal level. But he was also a little bit abusive, lied to my face more than once, gaslit me, and didn't really trust me to get work done during the pandemic. I was actually working more than I did pre-pandemic, but my boss didn't believe me. This is partly because my work differs from his, and partly because it is absolutely critical for his research and he needs as much out of me as possible in order for him to make progress. Several months ago I asked him if it was ok to make a minor change in my pandemic work situation, and he said yes. A week or two later he sent me an email asking me for details, I replied with what we agreed to, he forwarded my email to HR, and used that opportunity to crack down and place very strict requirements on my subsequent work situation. So I decided to leave. It took many months, and I did my job diligently (as always) during that time, but eventually I found a company that was excited for me to work there, and I'm excited to start working there as well. The company wants me working there ASAP. I asked if I could have a break between my current job, they said a short break would be ok, but one month was too long. So I told my boss I was leaving, gave the minimum notice my contract requires (more than a week, less than a month), and now my boss is absolutely pissed. He tells me it will take him many months to find a replacement, and asks if I could wait a few months before leaving. That I should have told him I was leaving to let him plan for this. That I was ruining his career. Other things of that nature. I get that it would have been nice to have given him some warning. I wish I felt I could have. But I didn't trust him. I don't think there are many industry jobs out there that will want to hire me and then be ok with waiting several months before I start. And I had no idea if I could even find an industry job in my field that I would have wanted to take. And if I HAD told my boss I wanted to leave, what would have happened? My boss says, ok, I need you to stay here six more months. Then he would have started interviewing candidates, and maybe hired one. Then the clock is really ticking because my boss can't afford to pay for two of me. During the first of those six months I would not have been able to interview anywhere, because no company would be willing to hire me six months out. Maybe 2-3 months from the deadline I could start interviewing. Knowing what I know now, I would have been unemployed for several months. Why should I have taken all the risk? So what do you all think, was I out of line? I know I burned a bridge, and I can never use my current boss as a reference, but I already thought I could never use him as a reference so I don't think this has changed very much except the level of hostility. | 0cb735c8e993552329185a10b9ca1fc18e0654871e3562376439ecc3cc468a8d | [
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"content": "Leaving academia. Old boss is pissed and despondent. Should I really feel responsible for screwing him over? I'm feeling a little bit gaslit so I'd like to write up a summary of my situation and hear some external opinions from other academics (for what they're worth...). Here is my perspective: ... | [
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"content": "Leaving academia. Old boss is pissed and despondent. Should I really feel responsible for screwing him over? I'm feeling a little bit gaslit so I'd like to write up a summary of my situation and hear some external opinions from other academics (for what they're worth...). Here is my perspective: ... | 5.384615 | 3.384615 | {
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Leaving academia. Old boss is pissed and despondent. Should I really feel responsible for screwing him over? I'm feeling a little bit gaslit so I'd like to write up a summary of my situation and hear some external opinions from other academics (for what they're worth...). Here is my perspective: I am currently a staff scientist (>PhD-level) in an academic research group. My boss was usually very nice, and often went out of his way to be helpful on a professional and personal level. But he was also a little bit abusive, lied to my face more than once, gaslit me, and didn't really trust me to get work done during the pandemic. I was actually working more than I did pre-pandemic, but my boss didn't believe me. This is partly because my work differs from his, and partly because it is absolutely critical for his research and he needs as much out of me as possible in order for him to make progress. Several months ago I asked him if it was ok to make a minor change in my pandemic work situation, and he said yes. A week or two later he sent me an email asking me for details, I replied with what we agreed to, he forwarded my email to HR, and used that opportunity to crack down and place very strict requirements on my subsequent work situation. So I decided to leave. It took many months, and I did my job diligently (as always) during that time, but eventually I found a company that was excited for me to work there, and I'm excited to start working there as well. The company wants me working there ASAP. I asked if I could have a break between my current job, they said a short break would be ok, but one month was too long. So I told my boss I was leaving, gave the minimum notice my contract requires (more than a week, less than a month), and now my boss is absolutely pissed. He tells me it will take him many months to find a replacement, and asks if I could wait a few months before leaving. That I should have told him I was leaving to let him plan for this. That I was ruining his career. Other things of that nature. I get that it would have been nice to have given him some warning. I wish I felt I could have. But I didn't trust him. I don't think there are many industry jobs out there that will want to hire me and then be ok with waiting several months before I start. And I had no idea if I could even find an industry job in my field that I would have wanted to take. And if I HAD told my boss I wanted to leave, what would have happened? My boss says, ok, I need you to stay here six more months. Then he would have started interviewing candidates, and maybe hired one. Then the clock is really ticking because my boss can't afford to pay for two of me. During the first of those six months I would not have been able to interview anywhere, because no company would be willing to hire me six months out. Maybe 2-3 months from the deadline I could start interviewing. Knowing what I know now, I would have been unemployed for several months. Why should I have taken all the risk? So what do you all think, was I out of line? I know I burned a bridge, and I can never use my current boss as a reference, but I already thought I could never use him as a reference so I don't think this has changed very much except the level of hostility. | 0cb735c8e993552329185a10b9ca1fc18e0654871e3562376439ecc3cc468a8d | [
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"content": "Leaving academia. Old boss is pissed and despondent. Should I really feel responsible for screwing him over? I'm feeling a little bit gaslit so I'd like to write up a summary of my situation and hear some external opinions from other academics (for what they're worth...). Here is my perspective: ... | [
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"content": "Leaving academia. Old boss is pissed and despondent. Should I really feel responsible for screwing him over? I'm feeling a little bit gaslit so I'd like to write up a summary of my situation and hear some external opinions from other academics (for what they're worth...). Here is my perspective: ... | [
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"content": "Leaving academia. Old boss is pissed and despondent. Should I really feel responsible for screwing him over? I'm feeling a little bit gaslit so I'd like to write up a summary of my situation and hear some external opinions from other academics (for what they're worth...). Here is my perspective: ... | 5.384615 | 5.184615 | {
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Leaving academia. Old boss is pissed and despondent. Should I really feel responsible for screwing him over? I'm feeling a little bit gaslit so I'd like to write up a summary of my situation and hear some external opinions from other academics (for what they're worth...). Here is my perspective: I am currently a staff scientist (>PhD-level) in an academic research group. My boss was usually very nice, and often went out of his way to be helpful on a professional and personal level. But he was also a little bit abusive, lied to my face more than once, gaslit me, and didn't really trust me to get work done during the pandemic. I was actually working more than I did pre-pandemic, but my boss didn't believe me. This is partly because my work differs from his, and partly because it is absolutely critical for his research and he needs as much out of me as possible in order for him to make progress. Several months ago I asked him if it was ok to make a minor change in my pandemic work situation, and he said yes. A week or two later he sent me an email asking me for details, I replied with what we agreed to, he forwarded my email to HR, and used that opportunity to crack down and place very strict requirements on my subsequent work situation. So I decided to leave. It took many months, and I did my job diligently (as always) during that time, but eventually I found a company that was excited for me to work there, and I'm excited to start working there as well. The company wants me working there ASAP. I asked if I could have a break between my current job, they said a short break would be ok, but one month was too long. So I told my boss I was leaving, gave the minimum notice my contract requires (more than a week, less than a month), and now my boss is absolutely pissed. He tells me it will take him many months to find a replacement, and asks if I could wait a few months before leaving. That I should have told him I was leaving to let him plan for this. That I was ruining his career. Other things of that nature. I get that it would have been nice to have given him some warning. I wish I felt I could have. But I didn't trust him. I don't think there are many industry jobs out there that will want to hire me and then be ok with waiting several months before I start. And I had no idea if I could even find an industry job in my field that I would have wanted to take. And if I HAD told my boss I wanted to leave, what would have happened? My boss says, ok, I need you to stay here six more months. Then he would have started interviewing candidates, and maybe hired one. Then the clock is really ticking because my boss can't afford to pay for two of me. During the first of those six months I would not have been able to interview anywhere, because no company would be willing to hire me six months out. Maybe 2-3 months from the deadline I could start interviewing. Knowing what I know now, I would have been unemployed for several months. Why should I have taken all the risk? So what do you all think, was I out of line? I know I burned a bridge, and I can never use my current boss as a reference, but I already thought I could never use him as a reference so I don't think this has changed very much except the level of hostility. | 0cb735c8e993552329185a10b9ca1fc18e0654871e3562376439ecc3cc468a8d | [
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"content": "Leaving academia. Old boss is pissed and despondent. Should I really feel responsible for screwing him over? I'm feeling a little bit gaslit so I'd like to write up a summary of my situation and hear some external opinions from other academics (for what they're worth...). Here is my perspective: ... | [
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"content": "Leaving academia. Old boss is pissed and despondent. Should I really feel responsible for screwing him over? I'm feeling a little bit gaslit so I'd like to write up a summary of my situation and hear some external opinions from other academics (for what they're worth...). Here is my perspective: ... | [
{
"content": "Leaving academia. Old boss is pissed and despondent. Should I really feel responsible for screwing him over? I'm feeling a little bit gaslit so I'd like to write up a summary of my situation and hear some external opinions from other academics (for what they're worth...). Here is my perspective: ... | 5.384615 | 4.884615 | {
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Leaving academia. Old boss is pissed and despondent. Should I really feel responsible for screwing him over? I'm feeling a little bit gaslit so I'd like to write up a summary of my situation and hear some external opinions from other academics (for what they're worth...). Here is my perspective: I am currently a staff scientist (>PhD-level) in an academic research group. My boss was usually very nice, and often went out of his way to be helpful on a professional and personal level. But he was also a little bit abusive, lied to my face more than once, gaslit me, and didn't really trust me to get work done during the pandemic. I was actually working more than I did pre-pandemic, but my boss didn't believe me. This is partly because my work differs from his, and partly because it is absolutely critical for his research and he needs as much out of me as possible in order for him to make progress. Several months ago I asked him if it was ok to make a minor change in my pandemic work situation, and he said yes. A week or two later he sent me an email asking me for details, I replied with what we agreed to, he forwarded my email to HR, and used that opportunity to crack down and place very strict requirements on my subsequent work situation. So I decided to leave. It took many months, and I did my job diligently (as always) during that time, but eventually I found a company that was excited for me to work there, and I'm excited to start working there as well. The company wants me working there ASAP. I asked if I could have a break between my current job, they said a short break would be ok, but one month was too long. So I told my boss I was leaving, gave the minimum notice my contract requires (more than a week, less than a month), and now my boss is absolutely pissed. He tells me it will take him many months to find a replacement, and asks if I could wait a few months before leaving. That I should have told him I was leaving to let him plan for this. That I was ruining his career. Other things of that nature. I get that it would have been nice to have given him some warning. I wish I felt I could have. But I didn't trust him. I don't think there are many industry jobs out there that will want to hire me and then be ok with waiting several months before I start. And I had no idea if I could even find an industry job in my field that I would have wanted to take. And if I HAD told my boss I wanted to leave, what would have happened? My boss says, ok, I need you to stay here six more months. Then he would have started interviewing candidates, and maybe hired one. Then the clock is really ticking because my boss can't afford to pay for two of me. During the first of those six months I would not have been able to interview anywhere, because no company would be willing to hire me six months out. Maybe 2-3 months from the deadline I could start interviewing. Knowing what I know now, I would have been unemployed for several months. Why should I have taken all the risk? So what do you all think, was I out of line? I know I burned a bridge, and I can never use my current boss as a reference, but I already thought I could never use him as a reference so I don't think this has changed very much except the level of hostility. | 0cb735c8e993552329185a10b9ca1fc18e0654871e3562376439ecc3cc468a8d | [
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"content": "Leaving academia. Old boss is pissed and despondent. Should I really feel responsible for screwing him over? I'm feeling a little bit gaslit so I'd like to write up a summary of my situation and hear some external opinions from other academics (for what they're worth...). Here is my perspective: ... | [
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"content": "Leaving academia. Old boss is pissed and despondent. Should I really feel responsible for screwing him over? I'm feeling a little bit gaslit so I'd like to write up a summary of my situation and hear some external opinions from other academics (for what they're worth...). Here is my perspective: ... | [
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"content": "Leaving academia. Old boss is pissed and despondent. Should I really feel responsible for screwing him over? I'm feeling a little bit gaslit so I'd like to write up a summary of my situation and hear some external opinions from other academics (for what they're worth...). Here is my perspective: ... | 5.384615 | 3.384615 | {
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Leaving academia. Old boss is pissed and despondent. Should I really feel responsible for screwing him over? I'm feeling a little bit gaslit so I'd like to write up a summary of my situation and hear some external opinions from other academics (for what they're worth...). Here is my perspective: I am currently a staff scientist (>PhD-level) in an academic research group. My boss was usually very nice, and often went out of his way to be helpful on a professional and personal level. But he was also a little bit abusive, lied to my face more than once, gaslit me, and didn't really trust me to get work done during the pandemic. I was actually working more than I did pre-pandemic, but my boss didn't believe me. This is partly because my work differs from his, and partly because it is absolutely critical for his research and he needs as much out of me as possible in order for him to make progress. Several months ago I asked him if it was ok to make a minor change in my pandemic work situation, and he said yes. A week or two later he sent me an email asking me for details, I replied with what we agreed to, he forwarded my email to HR, and used that opportunity to crack down and place very strict requirements on my subsequent work situation. So I decided to leave. It took many months, and I did my job diligently (as always) during that time, but eventually I found a company that was excited for me to work there, and I'm excited to start working there as well. The company wants me working there ASAP. I asked if I could have a break between my current job, they said a short break would be ok, but one month was too long. So I told my boss I was leaving, gave the minimum notice my contract requires (more than a week, less than a month), and now my boss is absolutely pissed. He tells me it will take him many months to find a replacement, and asks if I could wait a few months before leaving. That I should have told him I was leaving to let him plan for this. That I was ruining his career. Other things of that nature. I get that it would have been nice to have given him some warning. I wish I felt I could have. But I didn't trust him. I don't think there are many industry jobs out there that will want to hire me and then be ok with waiting several months before I start. And I had no idea if I could even find an industry job in my field that I would have wanted to take. And if I HAD told my boss I wanted to leave, what would have happened? My boss says, ok, I need you to stay here six more months. Then he would have started interviewing candidates, and maybe hired one. Then the clock is really ticking because my boss can't afford to pay for two of me. During the first of those six months I would not have been able to interview anywhere, because no company would be willing to hire me six months out. Maybe 2-3 months from the deadline I could start interviewing. Knowing what I know now, I would have been unemployed for several months. Why should I have taken all the risk? So what do you all think, was I out of line? I know I burned a bridge, and I can never use my current boss as a reference, but I already thought I could never use him as a reference so I don't think this has changed very much except the level of hostility. | 0cb735c8e993552329185a10b9ca1fc18e0654871e3562376439ecc3cc468a8d | [
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"content": "Leaving academia. Old boss is pissed and despondent. Should I really feel responsible for screwing him over? I'm feeling a little bit gaslit so I'd like to write up a summary of my situation and hear some external opinions from other academics (for what they're worth...). Here is my perspective: ... | [
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"content": "Leaving academia. Old boss is pissed and despondent. Should I really feel responsible for screwing him over? I'm feeling a little bit gaslit so I'd like to write up a summary of my situation and hear some external opinions from other academics (for what they're worth...). Here is my perspective: ... | [
{
"content": "Leaving academia. Old boss is pissed and despondent. Should I really feel responsible for screwing him over? I'm feeling a little bit gaslit so I'd like to write up a summary of my situation and hear some external opinions from other academics (for what they're worth...). Here is my perspective: ... | 5.384615 | 3.384615 | {
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Leaving academia. Old boss is pissed and despondent. Should I really feel responsible for screwing him over? I'm feeling a little bit gaslit so I'd like to write up a summary of my situation and hear some external opinions from other academics (for what they're worth...). Here is my perspective: I am currently a staff scientist (>PhD-level) in an academic research group. My boss was usually very nice, and often went out of his way to be helpful on a professional and personal level. But he was also a little bit abusive, lied to my face more than once, gaslit me, and didn't really trust me to get work done during the pandemic. I was actually working more than I did pre-pandemic, but my boss didn't believe me. This is partly because my work differs from his, and partly because it is absolutely critical for his research and he needs as much out of me as possible in order for him to make progress. Several months ago I asked him if it was ok to make a minor change in my pandemic work situation, and he said yes. A week or two later he sent me an email asking me for details, I replied with what we agreed to, he forwarded my email to HR, and used that opportunity to crack down and place very strict requirements on my subsequent work situation. So I decided to leave. It took many months, and I did my job diligently (as always) during that time, but eventually I found a company that was excited for me to work there, and I'm excited to start working there as well. The company wants me working there ASAP. I asked if I could have a break between my current job, they said a short break would be ok, but one month was too long. So I told my boss I was leaving, gave the minimum notice my contract requires (more than a week, less than a month), and now my boss is absolutely pissed. He tells me it will take him many months to find a replacement, and asks if I could wait a few months before leaving. That I should have told him I was leaving to let him plan for this. That I was ruining his career. Other things of that nature. I get that it would have been nice to have given him some warning. I wish I felt I could have. But I didn't trust him. I don't think there are many industry jobs out there that will want to hire me and then be ok with waiting several months before I start. And I had no idea if I could even find an industry job in my field that I would have wanted to take. And if I HAD told my boss I wanted to leave, what would have happened? My boss says, ok, I need you to stay here six more months. Then he would have started interviewing candidates, and maybe hired one. Then the clock is really ticking because my boss can't afford to pay for two of me. During the first of those six months I would not have been able to interview anywhere, because no company would be willing to hire me six months out. Maybe 2-3 months from the deadline I could start interviewing. Knowing what I know now, I would have been unemployed for several months. Why should I have taken all the risk? So what do you all think, was I out of line? I know I burned a bridge, and I can never use my current boss as a reference, but I already thought I could never use him as a reference so I don't think this has changed very much except the level of hostility. | 0cb735c8e993552329185a10b9ca1fc18e0654871e3562376439ecc3cc468a8d | [
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"content": "Leaving academia. Old boss is pissed and despondent. Should I really feel responsible for screwing him over? I'm feeling a little bit gaslit so I'd like to write up a summary of my situation and hear some external opinions from other academics (for what they're worth...). Here is my perspective: ... | [
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"content": "Leaving academia. Old boss is pissed and despondent. Should I really feel responsible for screwing him over? I'm feeling a little bit gaslit so I'd like to write up a summary of my situation and hear some external opinions from other academics (for what they're worth...). Here is my perspective: ... | [
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"content": "Leaving academia. Old boss is pissed and despondent. Should I really feel responsible for screwing him over? I'm feeling a little bit gaslit so I'd like to write up a summary of my situation and hear some external opinions from other academics (for what they're worth...). Here is my perspective: ... | 5.384615 | 3.384615 | {
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Leaving academia. Old boss is pissed and despondent. Should I really feel responsible for screwing him over? I'm feeling a little bit gaslit so I'd like to write up a summary of my situation and hear some external opinions from other academics (for what they're worth...). Here is my perspective: I am currently a staff scientist (>PhD-level) in an academic research group. My boss was usually very nice, and often went out of his way to be helpful on a professional and personal level. But he was also a little bit abusive, lied to my face more than once, gaslit me, and didn't really trust me to get work done during the pandemic. I was actually working more than I did pre-pandemic, but my boss didn't believe me. This is partly because my work differs from his, and partly because it is absolutely critical for his research and he needs as much out of me as possible in order for him to make progress. Several months ago I asked him if it was ok to make a minor change in my pandemic work situation, and he said yes. A week or two later he sent me an email asking me for details, I replied with what we agreed to, he forwarded my email to HR, and used that opportunity to crack down and place very strict requirements on my subsequent work situation. So I decided to leave. It took many months, and I did my job diligently (as always) during that time, but eventually I found a company that was excited for me to work there, and I'm excited to start working there as well. The company wants me working there ASAP. I asked if I could have a break between my current job, they said a short break would be ok, but one month was too long. So I told my boss I was leaving, gave the minimum notice my contract requires (more than a week, less than a month), and now my boss is absolutely pissed. He tells me it will take him many months to find a replacement, and asks if I could wait a few months before leaving. That I should have told him I was leaving to let him plan for this. That I was ruining his career. Other things of that nature. I get that it would have been nice to have given him some warning. I wish I felt I could have. But I didn't trust him. I don't think there are many industry jobs out there that will want to hire me and then be ok with waiting several months before I start. And I had no idea if I could even find an industry job in my field that I would have wanted to take. And if I HAD told my boss I wanted to leave, what would have happened? My boss says, ok, I need you to stay here six more months. Then he would have started interviewing candidates, and maybe hired one. Then the clock is really ticking because my boss can't afford to pay for two of me. During the first of those six months I would not have been able to interview anywhere, because no company would be willing to hire me six months out. Maybe 2-3 months from the deadline I could start interviewing. Knowing what I know now, I would have been unemployed for several months. Why should I have taken all the risk? So what do you all think, was I out of line? I know I burned a bridge, and I can never use my current boss as a reference, but I already thought I could never use him as a reference so I don't think this has changed very much except the level of hostility. | 0cb735c8e993552329185a10b9ca1fc18e0654871e3562376439ecc3cc468a8d | [
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"content": "Leaving academia. Old boss is pissed and despondent. Should I really feel responsible for screwing him over? I'm feeling a little bit gaslit so I'd like to write up a summary of my situation and hear some external opinions from other academics (for what they're worth...). Here is my perspective: ... | [
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Leaving academia. Old boss is pissed and despondent. Should I really feel responsible for screwing him over? I'm feeling a little bit gaslit so I'd like to write up a summary of my situation and hear some external opinions from other academics (for what they're worth...). Here is my perspective: I am currently a staff scientist (>PhD-level) in an academic research group. My boss was usually very nice, and often went out of his way to be helpful on a professional and personal level. But he was also a little bit abusive, lied to my face more than once, gaslit me, and didn't really trust me to get work done during the pandemic. I was actually working more than I did pre-pandemic, but my boss didn't believe me. This is partly because my work differs from his, and partly because it is absolutely critical for his research and he needs as much out of me as possible in order for him to make progress. Several months ago I asked him if it was ok to make a minor change in my pandemic work situation, and he said yes. A week or two later he sent me an email asking me for details, I replied with what we agreed to, he forwarded my email to HR, and used that opportunity to crack down and place very strict requirements on my subsequent work situation. So I decided to leave. It took many months, and I did my job diligently (as always) during that time, but eventually I found a company that was excited for me to work there, and I'm excited to start working there as well. The company wants me working there ASAP. I asked if I could have a break between my current job, they said a short break would be ok, but one month was too long. So I told my boss I was leaving, gave the minimum notice my contract requires (more than a week, less than a month), and now my boss is absolutely pissed. He tells me it will take him many months to find a replacement, and asks if I could wait a few months before leaving. That I should have told him I was leaving to let him plan for this. That I was ruining his career. Other things of that nature. I get that it would have been nice to have given him some warning. I wish I felt I could have. But I didn't trust him. I don't think there are many industry jobs out there that will want to hire me and then be ok with waiting several months before I start. And I had no idea if I could even find an industry job in my field that I would have wanted to take. And if I HAD told my boss I wanted to leave, what would have happened? My boss says, ok, I need you to stay here six more months. Then he would have started interviewing candidates, and maybe hired one. Then the clock is really ticking because my boss can't afford to pay for two of me. During the first of those six months I would not have been able to interview anywhere, because no company would be willing to hire me six months out. Maybe 2-3 months from the deadline I could start interviewing. Knowing what I know now, I would have been unemployed for several months. Why should I have taken all the risk? So what do you all think, was I out of line? I know I burned a bridge, and I can never use my current boss as a reference, but I already thought I could never use him as a reference so I don't think this has changed very much except the level of hostility. | 0cb735c8e993552329185a10b9ca1fc18e0654871e3562376439ecc3cc468a8d | [
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"content": "Leaving academia. Old boss is pissed and despondent. Should I really feel responsible for screwing him over? I'm feeling a little bit gaslit so I'd like to write up a summary of my situation and hear some external opinions from other academics (for what they're worth...). Here is my perspective: ... | [
{
"content": "Leaving academia. Old boss is pissed and despondent. Should I really feel responsible for screwing him over? I'm feeling a little bit gaslit so I'd like to write up a summary of my situation and hear some external opinions from other academics (for what they're worth...). Here is my perspective: ... | 5.25641 | 4.25641 | {
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Leaving academia. Old boss is pissed and despondent. Should I really feel responsible for screwing him over? I'm feeling a little bit gaslit so I'd like to write up a summary of my situation and hear some external opinions from other academics (for what they're worth...). Here is my perspective: I am currently a staff scientist (>PhD-level) in an academic research group. My boss was usually very nice, and often went out of his way to be helpful on a professional and personal level. But he was also a little bit abusive, lied to my face more than once, gaslit me, and didn't really trust me to get work done during the pandemic. I was actually working more than I did pre-pandemic, but my boss didn't believe me. This is partly because my work differs from his, and partly because it is absolutely critical for his research and he needs as much out of me as possible in order for him to make progress. Several months ago I asked him if it was ok to make a minor change in my pandemic work situation, and he said yes. A week or two later he sent me an email asking me for details, I replied with what we agreed to, he forwarded my email to HR, and used that opportunity to crack down and place very strict requirements on my subsequent work situation. So I decided to leave. It took many months, and I did my job diligently (as always) during that time, but eventually I found a company that was excited for me to work there, and I'm excited to start working there as well. The company wants me working there ASAP. I asked if I could have a break between my current job, they said a short break would be ok, but one month was too long. So I told my boss I was leaving, gave the minimum notice my contract requires (more than a week, less than a month), and now my boss is absolutely pissed. He tells me it will take him many months to find a replacement, and asks if I could wait a few months before leaving. That I should have told him I was leaving to let him plan for this. That I was ruining his career. Other things of that nature. I get that it would have been nice to have given him some warning. I wish I felt I could have. But I didn't trust him. I don't think there are many industry jobs out there that will want to hire me and then be ok with waiting several months before I start. And I had no idea if I could even find an industry job in my field that I would have wanted to take. And if I HAD told my boss I wanted to leave, what would have happened? My boss says, ok, I need you to stay here six more months. Then he would have started interviewing candidates, and maybe hired one. Then the clock is really ticking because my boss can't afford to pay for two of me. During the first of those six months I would not have been able to interview anywhere, because no company would be willing to hire me six months out. Maybe 2-3 months from the deadline I could start interviewing. Knowing what I know now, I would have been unemployed for several months. Why should I have taken all the risk? So what do you all think, was I out of line? I know I burned a bridge, and I can never use my current boss as a reference, but I already thought I could never use him as a reference so I don't think this has changed very much except the level of hostility. | 0cb735c8e993552329185a10b9ca1fc18e0654871e3562376439ecc3cc468a8d | [
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"content": "Leaving academia. Old boss is pissed and despondent. Should I really feel responsible for screwing him over? I'm feeling a little bit gaslit so I'd like to write up a summary of my situation and hear some external opinions from other academics (for what they're worth...). Here is my perspective: ... | [
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"content": "Leaving academia. Old boss is pissed and despondent. Should I really feel responsible for screwing him over? I'm feeling a little bit gaslit so I'd like to write up a summary of my situation and hear some external opinions from other academics (for what they're worth...). Here is my perspective: ... | [
{
"content": "Leaving academia. Old boss is pissed and despondent. Should I really feel responsible for screwing him over? I'm feeling a little bit gaslit so I'd like to write up a summary of my situation and hear some external opinions from other academics (for what they're worth...). Here is my perspective: ... | 5.25641 | 4.25641 | {
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Leaving academia. Old boss is pissed and despondent. Should I really feel responsible for screwing him over? I'm feeling a little bit gaslit so I'd like to write up a summary of my situation and hear some external opinions from other academics (for what they're worth...). Here is my perspective: I am currently a staff scientist (>PhD-level) in an academic research group. My boss was usually very nice, and often went out of his way to be helpful on a professional and personal level. But he was also a little bit abusive, lied to my face more than once, gaslit me, and didn't really trust me to get work done during the pandemic. I was actually working more than I did pre-pandemic, but my boss didn't believe me. This is partly because my work differs from his, and partly because it is absolutely critical for his research and he needs as much out of me as possible in order for him to make progress. Several months ago I asked him if it was ok to make a minor change in my pandemic work situation, and he said yes. A week or two later he sent me an email asking me for details, I replied with what we agreed to, he forwarded my email to HR, and used that opportunity to crack down and place very strict requirements on my subsequent work situation. So I decided to leave. It took many months, and I did my job diligently (as always) during that time, but eventually I found a company that was excited for me to work there, and I'm excited to start working there as well. The company wants me working there ASAP. I asked if I could have a break between my current job, they said a short break would be ok, but one month was too long. So I told my boss I was leaving, gave the minimum notice my contract requires (more than a week, less than a month), and now my boss is absolutely pissed. He tells me it will take him many months to find a replacement, and asks if I could wait a few months before leaving. That I should have told him I was leaving to let him plan for this. That I was ruining his career. Other things of that nature. I get that it would have been nice to have given him some warning. I wish I felt I could have. But I didn't trust him. I don't think there are many industry jobs out there that will want to hire me and then be ok with waiting several months before I start. And I had no idea if I could even find an industry job in my field that I would have wanted to take. And if I HAD told my boss I wanted to leave, what would have happened? My boss says, ok, I need you to stay here six more months. Then he would have started interviewing candidates, and maybe hired one. Then the clock is really ticking because my boss can't afford to pay for two of me. During the first of those six months I would not have been able to interview anywhere, because no company would be willing to hire me six months out. Maybe 2-3 months from the deadline I could start interviewing. Knowing what I know now, I would have been unemployed for several months. Why should I have taken all the risk? So what do you all think, was I out of line? I know I burned a bridge, and I can never use my current boss as a reference, but I already thought I could never use him as a reference so I don't think this has changed very much except the level of hostility. | 0cb735c8e993552329185a10b9ca1fc18e0654871e3562376439ecc3cc468a8d | [
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"content": "Leaving academia. Old boss is pissed and despondent. Should I really feel responsible for screwing him over? I'm feeling a little bit gaslit so I'd like to write up a summary of my situation and hear some external opinions from other academics (for what they're worth...). Here is my perspective: ... | [
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"content": "Leaving academia. Old boss is pissed and despondent. Should I really feel responsible for screwing him over? I'm feeling a little bit gaslit so I'd like to write up a summary of my situation and hear some external opinions from other academics (for what they're worth...). Here is my perspective: ... | [
{
"content": "Leaving academia. Old boss is pissed and despondent. Should I really feel responsible for screwing him over? I'm feeling a little bit gaslit so I'd like to write up a summary of my situation and hear some external opinions from other academics (for what they're worth...). Here is my perspective: ... | 5.192308 | 4.692308 | {
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Leaving academia. Old boss is pissed and despondent. Should I really feel responsible for screwing him over? I'm feeling a little bit gaslit so I'd like to write up a summary of my situation and hear some external opinions from other academics (for what they're worth...). Here is my perspective: I am currently a staff scientist (>PhD-level) in an academic research group. My boss was usually very nice, and often went out of his way to be helpful on a professional and personal level. But he was also a little bit abusive, lied to my face more than once, gaslit me, and didn't really trust me to get work done during the pandemic. I was actually working more than I did pre-pandemic, but my boss didn't believe me. This is partly because my work differs from his, and partly because it is absolutely critical for his research and he needs as much out of me as possible in order for him to make progress. Several months ago I asked him if it was ok to make a minor change in my pandemic work situation, and he said yes. A week or two later he sent me an email asking me for details, I replied with what we agreed to, he forwarded my email to HR, and used that opportunity to crack down and place very strict requirements on my subsequent work situation. So I decided to leave. It took many months, and I did my job diligently (as always) during that time, but eventually I found a company that was excited for me to work there, and I'm excited to start working there as well. The company wants me working there ASAP. I asked if I could have a break between my current job, they said a short break would be ok, but one month was too long. So I told my boss I was leaving, gave the minimum notice my contract requires (more than a week, less than a month), and now my boss is absolutely pissed. He tells me it will take him many months to find a replacement, and asks if I could wait a few months before leaving. That I should have told him I was leaving to let him plan for this. That I was ruining his career. Other things of that nature. I get that it would have been nice to have given him some warning. I wish I felt I could have. But I didn't trust him. I don't think there are many industry jobs out there that will want to hire me and then be ok with waiting several months before I start. And I had no idea if I could even find an industry job in my field that I would have wanted to take. And if I HAD told my boss I wanted to leave, what would have happened? My boss says, ok, I need you to stay here six more months. Then he would have started interviewing candidates, and maybe hired one. Then the clock is really ticking because my boss can't afford to pay for two of me. During the first of those six months I would not have been able to interview anywhere, because no company would be willing to hire me six months out. Maybe 2-3 months from the deadline I could start interviewing. Knowing what I know now, I would have been unemployed for several months. Why should I have taken all the risk? So what do you all think, was I out of line? I know I burned a bridge, and I can never use my current boss as a reference, but I already thought I could never use him as a reference so I don't think this has changed very much except the level of hostility. | 0cb735c8e993552329185a10b9ca1fc18e0654871e3562376439ecc3cc468a8d | [
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"content": "Leaving academia. Old boss is pissed and despondent. Should I really feel responsible for screwing him over? I'm feeling a little bit gaslit so I'd like to write up a summary of my situation and hear some external opinions from other academics (for what they're worth...). Here is my perspective: ... | [
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"content": "Leaving academia. Old boss is pissed and despondent. Should I really feel responsible for screwing him over? I'm feeling a little bit gaslit so I'd like to write up a summary of my situation and hear some external opinions from other academics (for what they're worth...). Here is my perspective: ... | [
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"content": "Leaving academia. Old boss is pissed and despondent. Should I really feel responsible for screwing him over? I'm feeling a little bit gaslit so I'd like to write up a summary of my situation and hear some external opinions from other academics (for what they're worth...). Here is my perspective: ... | 5.192308 | 4.692308 | {
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Leaving academia. Old boss is pissed and despondent. Should I really feel responsible for screwing him over? I'm feeling a little bit gaslit so I'd like to write up a summary of my situation and hear some external opinions from other academics (for what they're worth...). Here is my perspective: I am currently a staff scientist (>PhD-level) in an academic research group. My boss was usually very nice, and often went out of his way to be helpful on a professional and personal level. But he was also a little bit abusive, lied to my face more than once, gaslit me, and didn't really trust me to get work done during the pandemic. I was actually working more than I did pre-pandemic, but my boss didn't believe me. This is partly because my work differs from his, and partly because it is absolutely critical for his research and he needs as much out of me as possible in order for him to make progress. Several months ago I asked him if it was ok to make a minor change in my pandemic work situation, and he said yes. A week or two later he sent me an email asking me for details, I replied with what we agreed to, he forwarded my email to HR, and used that opportunity to crack down and place very strict requirements on my subsequent work situation. So I decided to leave. It took many months, and I did my job diligently (as always) during that time, but eventually I found a company that was excited for me to work there, and I'm excited to start working there as well. The company wants me working there ASAP. I asked if I could have a break between my current job, they said a short break would be ok, but one month was too long. So I told my boss I was leaving, gave the minimum notice my contract requires (more than a week, less than a month), and now my boss is absolutely pissed. He tells me it will take him many months to find a replacement, and asks if I could wait a few months before leaving. That I should have told him I was leaving to let him plan for this. That I was ruining his career. Other things of that nature. I get that it would have been nice to have given him some warning. I wish I felt I could have. But I didn't trust him. I don't think there are many industry jobs out there that will want to hire me and then be ok with waiting several months before I start. And I had no idea if I could even find an industry job in my field that I would have wanted to take. And if I HAD told my boss I wanted to leave, what would have happened? My boss says, ok, I need you to stay here six more months. Then he would have started interviewing candidates, and maybe hired one. Then the clock is really ticking because my boss can't afford to pay for two of me. During the first of those six months I would not have been able to interview anywhere, because no company would be willing to hire me six months out. Maybe 2-3 months from the deadline I could start interviewing. Knowing what I know now, I would have been unemployed for several months. Why should I have taken all the risk? So what do you all think, was I out of line? I know I burned a bridge, and I can never use my current boss as a reference, but I already thought I could never use him as a reference so I don't think this has changed very much except the level of hostility. | 0cb735c8e993552329185a10b9ca1fc18e0654871e3562376439ecc3cc468a8d | [
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"content": "Leaving academia. Old boss is pissed and despondent. Should I really feel responsible for screwing him over? I'm feeling a little bit gaslit so I'd like to write up a summary of my situation and hear some external opinions from other academics (for what they're worth...). Here is my perspective: ... | [
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"content": "Leaving academia. Old boss is pissed and despondent. Should I really feel responsible for screwing him over? I'm feeling a little bit gaslit so I'd like to write up a summary of my situation and hear some external opinions from other academics (for what they're worth...). Here is my perspective: ... | [
{
"content": "Leaving academia. Old boss is pissed and despondent. Should I really feel responsible for screwing him over? I'm feeling a little bit gaslit so I'd like to write up a summary of my situation and hear some external opinions from other academics (for what they're worth...). Here is my perspective: ... | 5.192308 | 4.692308 | {
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Leaving academia. Old boss is pissed and despondent. Should I really feel responsible for screwing him over? I'm feeling a little bit gaslit so I'd like to write up a summary of my situation and hear some external opinions from other academics (for what they're worth...). Here is my perspective: I am currently a staff scientist (>PhD-level) in an academic research group. My boss was usually very nice, and often went out of his way to be helpful on a professional and personal level. But he was also a little bit abusive, lied to my face more than once, gaslit me, and didn't really trust me to get work done during the pandemic. I was actually working more than I did pre-pandemic, but my boss didn't believe me. This is partly because my work differs from his, and partly because it is absolutely critical for his research and he needs as much out of me as possible in order for him to make progress. Several months ago I asked him if it was ok to make a minor change in my pandemic work situation, and he said yes. A week or two later he sent me an email asking me for details, I replied with what we agreed to, he forwarded my email to HR, and used that opportunity to crack down and place very strict requirements on my subsequent work situation. So I decided to leave. It took many months, and I did my job diligently (as always) during that time, but eventually I found a company that was excited for me to work there, and I'm excited to start working there as well. The company wants me working there ASAP. I asked if I could have a break between my current job, they said a short break would be ok, but one month was too long. So I told my boss I was leaving, gave the minimum notice my contract requires (more than a week, less than a month), and now my boss is absolutely pissed. He tells me it will take him many months to find a replacement, and asks if I could wait a few months before leaving. That I should have told him I was leaving to let him plan for this. That I was ruining his career. Other things of that nature. I get that it would have been nice to have given him some warning. I wish I felt I could have. But I didn't trust him. I don't think there are many industry jobs out there that will want to hire me and then be ok with waiting several months before I start. And I had no idea if I could even find an industry job in my field that I would have wanted to take. And if I HAD told my boss I wanted to leave, what would have happened? My boss says, ok, I need you to stay here six more months. Then he would have started interviewing candidates, and maybe hired one. Then the clock is really ticking because my boss can't afford to pay for two of me. During the first of those six months I would not have been able to interview anywhere, because no company would be willing to hire me six months out. Maybe 2-3 months from the deadline I could start interviewing. Knowing what I know now, I would have been unemployed for several months. Why should I have taken all the risk? So what do you all think, was I out of line? I know I burned a bridge, and I can never use my current boss as a reference, but I already thought I could never use him as a reference so I don't think this has changed very much except the level of hostility. | 0cb735c8e993552329185a10b9ca1fc18e0654871e3562376439ecc3cc468a8d | [
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"content": "Leaving academia. Old boss is pissed and despondent. Should I really feel responsible for screwing him over? I'm feeling a little bit gaslit so I'd like to write up a summary of my situation and hear some external opinions from other academics (for what they're worth...). Here is my perspective: ... | [
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"content": "Leaving academia. Old boss is pissed and despondent. Should I really feel responsible for screwing him over? I'm feeling a little bit gaslit so I'd like to write up a summary of my situation and hear some external opinions from other academics (for what they're worth...). Here is my perspective: ... | [
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"content": "Leaving academia. Old boss is pissed and despondent. Should I really feel responsible for screwing him over? I'm feeling a little bit gaslit so I'd like to write up a summary of my situation and hear some external opinions from other academics (for what they're worth...). Here is my perspective: ... | 5.192308 | 4.692308 | {
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Leaving academia. Old boss is pissed and despondent. Should I really feel responsible for screwing him over? I'm feeling a little bit gaslit so I'd like to write up a summary of my situation and hear some external opinions from other academics (for what they're worth...). Here is my perspective: I am currently a staff scientist (>PhD-level) in an academic research group. My boss was usually very nice, and often went out of his way to be helpful on a professional and personal level. But he was also a little bit abusive, lied to my face more than once, gaslit me, and didn't really trust me to get work done during the pandemic. I was actually working more than I did pre-pandemic, but my boss didn't believe me. This is partly because my work differs from his, and partly because it is absolutely critical for his research and he needs as much out of me as possible in order for him to make progress. Several months ago I asked him if it was ok to make a minor change in my pandemic work situation, and he said yes. A week or two later he sent me an email asking me for details, I replied with what we agreed to, he forwarded my email to HR, and used that opportunity to crack down and place very strict requirements on my subsequent work situation. So I decided to leave. It took many months, and I did my job diligently (as always) during that time, but eventually I found a company that was excited for me to work there, and I'm excited to start working there as well. The company wants me working there ASAP. I asked if I could have a break between my current job, they said a short break would be ok, but one month was too long. So I told my boss I was leaving, gave the minimum notice my contract requires (more than a week, less than a month), and now my boss is absolutely pissed. He tells me it will take him many months to find a replacement, and asks if I could wait a few months before leaving. That I should have told him I was leaving to let him plan for this. That I was ruining his career. Other things of that nature. I get that it would have been nice to have given him some warning. I wish I felt I could have. But I didn't trust him. I don't think there are many industry jobs out there that will want to hire me and then be ok with waiting several months before I start. And I had no idea if I could even find an industry job in my field that I would have wanted to take. And if I HAD told my boss I wanted to leave, what would have happened? My boss says, ok, I need you to stay here six more months. Then he would have started interviewing candidates, and maybe hired one. Then the clock is really ticking because my boss can't afford to pay for two of me. During the first of those six months I would not have been able to interview anywhere, because no company would be willing to hire me six months out. Maybe 2-3 months from the deadline I could start interviewing. Knowing what I know now, I would have been unemployed for several months. Why should I have taken all the risk? So what do you all think, was I out of line? I know I burned a bridge, and I can never use my current boss as a reference, but I already thought I could never use him as a reference so I don't think this has changed very much except the level of hostility. | 0cb735c8e993552329185a10b9ca1fc18e0654871e3562376439ecc3cc468a8d | [
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"content": "Leaving academia. Old boss is pissed and despondent. Should I really feel responsible for screwing him over? I'm feeling a little bit gaslit so I'd like to write up a summary of my situation and hear some external opinions from other academics (for what they're worth...). Here is my perspective: ... | [
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To the dog owners: How has dog ownership complicated your life in academia, especially during post-docs I’m in physics so making this STEM specific I’m considering adopting a Labrador and am conflicted because I’m really not sure where I’ll end up after the PhD and the last thing I want is to have to give it up. What has been your experience with dog ownership during an early academic career? I’m also interested in perspectives by those in industry if any are here, or have bounced between industry and academia. | 03739b9e7a6f297a422156f5f074418b97f24a14e9e2a7cf5b9c7e9d8817ea43 | [
{
"content": "To the dog owners: How has dog ownership complicated your life in academia, especially during post-docs I’m in physics so making this STEM specific I’m considering adopting a Labrador and am conflicted because I’m really not sure where I’ll end up after the PhD and the last thing I want is to hav... | [
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"content": "To the dog owners: How has dog ownership complicated your life in academia, especially during post-docs I’m in physics so making this STEM specific I’m considering adopting a Labrador and am conflicted because I’m really not sure where I’ll end up after the PhD and the last thing I want is to hav... | [
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To the dog owners: How has dog ownership complicated your life in academia, especially during post-docs I’m in physics so making this STEM specific I’m considering adopting a Labrador and am conflicted because I’m really not sure where I’ll end up after the PhD and the last thing I want is to have to give it up. What has been your experience with dog ownership during an early academic career? I’m also interested in perspectives by those in industry if any are here, or have bounced between industry and academia. | 03739b9e7a6f297a422156f5f074418b97f24a14e9e2a7cf5b9c7e9d8817ea43 | [
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To the dog owners: How has dog ownership complicated your life in academia, especially during post-docs I’m in physics so making this STEM specific I’m considering adopting a Labrador and am conflicted because I’m really not sure where I’ll end up after the PhD and the last thing I want is to have to give it up. What has been your experience with dog ownership during an early academic career? I’m also interested in perspectives by those in industry if any are here, or have bounced between industry and academia. | 03739b9e7a6f297a422156f5f074418b97f24a14e9e2a7cf5b9c7e9d8817ea43 | [
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To the dog owners: How has dog ownership complicated your life in academia, especially during post-docs I’m in physics so making this STEM specific I’m considering adopting a Labrador and am conflicted because I’m really not sure where I’ll end up after the PhD and the last thing I want is to have to give it up. What has been your experience with dog ownership during an early academic career? I’m also interested in perspectives by those in industry if any are here, or have bounced between industry and academia. | 03739b9e7a6f297a422156f5f074418b97f24a14e9e2a7cf5b9c7e9d8817ea43 | [
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To the dog owners: How has dog ownership complicated your life in academia, especially during post-docs I’m in physics so making this STEM specific I’m considering adopting a Labrador and am conflicted because I’m really not sure where I’ll end up after the PhD and the last thing I want is to have to give it up. What has been your experience with dog ownership during an early academic career? I’m also interested in perspectives by those in industry if any are here, or have bounced between industry and academia. | 03739b9e7a6f297a422156f5f074418b97f24a14e9e2a7cf5b9c7e9d8817ea43 | [
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To the dog owners: How has dog ownership complicated your life in academia, especially during post-docs I’m in physics so making this STEM specific I’m considering adopting a Labrador and am conflicted because I’m really not sure where I’ll end up after the PhD and the last thing I want is to have to give it up. What has been your experience with dog ownership during an early academic career? I’m also interested in perspectives by those in industry if any are here, or have bounced between industry and academia. | 03739b9e7a6f297a422156f5f074418b97f24a14e9e2a7cf5b9c7e9d8817ea43 | [
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To the dog owners: How has dog ownership complicated your life in academia, especially during post-docs I’m in physics so making this STEM specific I’m considering adopting a Labrador and am conflicted because I’m really not sure where I’ll end up after the PhD and the last thing I want is to have to give it up. What has been your experience with dog ownership during an early academic career? I’m also interested in perspectives by those in industry if any are here, or have bounced between industry and academia. | 03739b9e7a6f297a422156f5f074418b97f24a14e9e2a7cf5b9c7e9d8817ea43 | [
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To the dog owners: How has dog ownership complicated your life in academia, especially during post-docs I’m in physics so making this STEM specific I’m considering adopting a Labrador and am conflicted because I’m really not sure where I’ll end up after the PhD and the last thing I want is to have to give it up. What has been your experience with dog ownership during an early academic career? I’m also interested in perspectives by those in industry if any are here, or have bounced between industry and academia. | 03739b9e7a6f297a422156f5f074418b97f24a14e9e2a7cf5b9c7e9d8817ea43 | [
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To the dog owners: How has dog ownership complicated your life in academia, especially during post-docs I’m in physics so making this STEM specific I’m considering adopting a Labrador and am conflicted because I’m really not sure where I’ll end up after the PhD and the last thing I want is to have to give it up. What has been your experience with dog ownership during an early academic career? I’m also interested in perspectives by those in industry if any are here, or have bounced between industry and academia. | 03739b9e7a6f297a422156f5f074418b97f24a14e9e2a7cf5b9c7e9d8817ea43 | [
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"content": "To the dog owners: How has dog ownership complicated your life in academia, especially during post-docs I’m in physics so making this STEM specific I’m considering adopting a Labrador and am conflicted because I’m really not sure where I’ll end up after the PhD and the last thing I want is to hav... | [
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To the dog owners: How has dog ownership complicated your life in academia, especially during post-docs I’m in physics so making this STEM specific I’m considering adopting a Labrador and am conflicted because I’m really not sure where I’ll end up after the PhD and the last thing I want is to have to give it up. What has been your experience with dog ownership during an early academic career? I’m also interested in perspectives by those in industry if any are here, or have bounced between industry and academia. | 03739b9e7a6f297a422156f5f074418b97f24a14e9e2a7cf5b9c7e9d8817ea43 | [
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"content": "To the dog owners: How has dog ownership complicated your life in academia, especially during post-docs I’m in physics so making this STEM specific I’m considering adopting a Labrador and am conflicted because I’m really not sure where I’ll end up after the PhD and the last thing I want is to hav... | [
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To the dog owners: How has dog ownership complicated your life in academia, especially during post-docs I’m in physics so making this STEM specific I’m considering adopting a Labrador and am conflicted because I’m really not sure where I’ll end up after the PhD and the last thing I want is to have to give it up. What has been your experience with dog ownership during an early academic career? I’m also interested in perspectives by those in industry if any are here, or have bounced between industry and academia. | 03739b9e7a6f297a422156f5f074418b97f24a14e9e2a7cf5b9c7e9d8817ea43 | [
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To the dog owners: How has dog ownership complicated your life in academia, especially during post-docs I’m in physics so making this STEM specific I’m considering adopting a Labrador and am conflicted because I’m really not sure where I’ll end up after the PhD and the last thing I want is to have to give it up. What has been your experience with dog ownership during an early academic career? I’m also interested in perspectives by those in industry if any are here, or have bounced between industry and academia. | 03739b9e7a6f297a422156f5f074418b97f24a14e9e2a7cf5b9c7e9d8817ea43 | [
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To the dog owners: How has dog ownership complicated your life in academia, especially during post-docs I’m in physics so making this STEM specific I’m considering adopting a Labrador and am conflicted because I’m really not sure where I’ll end up after the PhD and the last thing I want is to have to give it up. What has been your experience with dog ownership during an early academic career? I’m also interested in perspectives by those in industry if any are here, or have bounced between industry and academia. | 03739b9e7a6f297a422156f5f074418b97f24a14e9e2a7cf5b9c7e9d8817ea43 | [
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To the dog owners: How has dog ownership complicated your life in academia, especially during post-docs I’m in physics so making this STEM specific I’m considering adopting a Labrador and am conflicted because I’m really not sure where I’ll end up after the PhD and the last thing I want is to have to give it up. What has been your experience with dog ownership during an early academic career? I’m also interested in perspectives by those in industry if any are here, or have bounced between industry and academia. | 03739b9e7a6f297a422156f5f074418b97f24a14e9e2a7cf5b9c7e9d8817ea43 | [
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To the dog owners: How has dog ownership complicated your life in academia, especially during post-docs I’m in physics so making this STEM specific I’m considering adopting a Labrador and am conflicted because I’m really not sure where I’ll end up after the PhD and the last thing I want is to have to give it up. What has been your experience with dog ownership during an early academic career? I’m also interested in perspectives by those in industry if any are here, or have bounced between industry and academia. | 03739b9e7a6f297a422156f5f074418b97f24a14e9e2a7cf5b9c7e9d8817ea43 | [
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To the dog owners: How has dog ownership complicated your life in academia, especially during post-docs I’m in physics so making this STEM specific I’m considering adopting a Labrador and am conflicted because I’m really not sure where I’ll end up after the PhD and the last thing I want is to have to give it up. What has been your experience with dog ownership during an early academic career? I’m also interested in perspectives by those in industry if any are here, or have bounced between industry and academia. | 03739b9e7a6f297a422156f5f074418b97f24a14e9e2a7cf5b9c7e9d8817ea43 | [
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To the dog owners: How has dog ownership complicated your life in academia, especially during post-docs I’m in physics so making this STEM specific I’m considering adopting a Labrador and am conflicted because I’m really not sure where I’ll end up after the PhD and the last thing I want is to have to give it up. What has been your experience with dog ownership during an early academic career? I’m also interested in perspectives by those in industry if any are here, or have bounced between industry and academia. | 03739b9e7a6f297a422156f5f074418b97f24a14e9e2a7cf5b9c7e9d8817ea43 | [
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To the dog owners: How has dog ownership complicated your life in academia, especially during post-docs I’m in physics so making this STEM specific I’m considering adopting a Labrador and am conflicted because I’m really not sure where I’ll end up after the PhD and the last thing I want is to have to give it up. What has been your experience with dog ownership during an early academic career? I’m also interested in perspectives by those in industry if any are here, or have bounced between industry and academia. | 03739b9e7a6f297a422156f5f074418b97f24a14e9e2a7cf5b9c7e9d8817ea43 | [
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To the dog owners: How has dog ownership complicated your life in academia, especially during post-docs I’m in physics so making this STEM specific I’m considering adopting a Labrador and am conflicted because I’m really not sure where I’ll end up after the PhD and the last thing I want is to have to give it up. What has been your experience with dog ownership during an early academic career? I’m also interested in perspectives by those in industry if any are here, or have bounced between industry and academia. | 03739b9e7a6f297a422156f5f074418b97f24a14e9e2a7cf5b9c7e9d8817ea43 | [
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To the dog owners: How has dog ownership complicated your life in academia, especially during post-docs I’m in physics so making this STEM specific I’m considering adopting a Labrador and am conflicted because I’m really not sure where I’ll end up after the PhD and the last thing I want is to have to give it up. What has been your experience with dog ownership during an early academic career? I’m also interested in perspectives by those in industry if any are here, or have bounced between industry and academia. | 03739b9e7a6f297a422156f5f074418b97f24a14e9e2a7cf5b9c7e9d8817ea43 | [
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For those of you who have sent guest speaker invitations by email, how quickly do they typically get back to you? I’m just curious to learn this as I’m working on an event for the first time. | c148bdd1e88ee3e1ac5c72ed4d9d5d95c17d2c517e71e3d1538f4f5001f8d955 | [
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"content": "For those of you who have sent guest speaker invitations by email, how quickly do they typically get back to you? I’m just curious to learn this as I’m working on an event for the first time.",
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"content": "Highly variable!. Anywhere from 5 min to 3 weeks to never.",... | [
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"content": "For those of you who have sent guest speaker invitations by email, how quickly do they typically get back to you? I’m just curious to learn this as I’m working on an event for the first time.",
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"content": "Day or two usually, if your invitation is clear",
"role"... | [
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"content": "For those of you who have sent guest speaker invitations by email, how quickly do they typically get back to you? I’m just curious to learn this as I’m working on an event for the first time.",
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"content": "Highly variable!. Anywhere from 5 min to 3 weeks to never.",... | 10 | 0 | {
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For those of you who have sent guest speaker invitations by email, how quickly do they typically get back to you? I’m just curious to learn this as I’m working on an event for the first time. | c148bdd1e88ee3e1ac5c72ed4d9d5d95c17d2c517e71e3d1538f4f5001f8d955 | [
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"content": "For those of you who have sent guest speaker invitations by email, how quickly do they typically get back to you? I’m just curious to learn this as I’m working on an event for the first time.",
"role": "user"
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"content": "One was almost immediate, one came three months after the ev... | [
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"content": "For those of you who have sent guest speaker invitations by email, how quickly do they typically get back to you? I’m just curious to learn this as I’m working on an event for the first time.",
"role": "user"
},
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"content": "Day or two usually, if your invitation is clear",
"role"... | [
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"content": "For those of you who have sent guest speaker invitations by email, how quickly do they typically get back to you? I’m just curious to learn this as I’m working on an event for the first time.",
"role": "user"
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"content": "One was almost immediate, one came three months after the ev... | 6.089744 | 3.689744 | {
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For those of you who have sent guest speaker invitations by email, how quickly do they typically get back to you? I’m just curious to learn this as I’m working on an event for the first time. | c148bdd1e88ee3e1ac5c72ed4d9d5d95c17d2c517e71e3d1538f4f5001f8d955 | [
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"content": "For those of you who have sent guest speaker invitations by email, how quickly do they typically get back to you? I’m just curious to learn this as I’m working on an event for the first time.",
"role": "user"
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"content": "who are you? does your email look spammy? does your confere... | [
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"role": "user"
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"role"... | [
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For those of you who have sent guest speaker invitations by email, how quickly do they typically get back to you? I’m just curious to learn this as I’m working on an event for the first time. | c148bdd1e88ee3e1ac5c72ed4d9d5d95c17d2c517e71e3d1538f4f5001f8d955 | [
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"role": "user"
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"content": "who are you? does your email look spammy? does your confere... | [
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"role": "user"
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"content": "If you don't get a response in a few days, consider that you... | [
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"content": "For those of you who have sent guest speaker invitations by email, how quickly do they typically get back to you? I’m just curious to learn this as I’m working on an event for the first time.",
"role": "user"
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"content": "who are you? does your email look spammy? does your confere... | 5.897436 | 4.097436 | {
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For those of you who have sent guest speaker invitations by email, how quickly do they typically get back to you? I’m just curious to learn this as I’m working on an event for the first time. | c148bdd1e88ee3e1ac5c72ed4d9d5d95c17d2c517e71e3d1538f4f5001f8d955 | [
{
"content": "For those of you who have sent guest speaker invitations by email, how quickly do they typically get back to you? I’m just curious to learn this as I’m working on an event for the first time.",
"role": "user"
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"content": "Unless you're a very reputable organisation, it's straight t... | [
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"content": "For those of you who have sent guest speaker invitations by email, how quickly do they typically get back to you? I’m just curious to learn this as I’m working on an event for the first time.",
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"content": "1 - 3 days from the ones who were interested. Between a day ... | [
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"content": "For those of you who have sent guest speaker invitations by email, how quickly do they typically get back to you? I’m just curious to learn this as I’m working on an event for the first time.",
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"content": "Unless you're a very reputable organisation, it's straight t... | 5.25641 | 4.25641 | {
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What do you think the "outcome" of trying to prevent cheating via AI will look like? I was just glancing at this post and it's gotten me thinking about what happens when AI is well-developed enough to be virtually "uncatchable." Right now AI can make up legit-looking but not real sources so they're easy to check by just looking up the citations. Additionally, IME many AI-generated pieces are fairly stilted in their language use. But some day that won't be the case. In fact, some day it may be possible that AI can essentially create an otherwise legitimate, well-done paper (as in, pull real sources together and create a novel document from them) with little student input. How do you think higher ed will adapt? (I'm thinking mostly about teaching/testing students, but if you want to talk about research and scientific writing, feel free!) I feel like if we can somehow get away from this "college is to get a job" so that many/most students don't actually care about the learning but are just there to check a box we might be able to just generally reduce the impetus to cheat in general, but that will require some significant societal change. I was thinking that in many fields that might ask you to write a paper (as opposed to sit an exam during class time where you couldn't access an AI bot) we may benefit from giving up the "arms race" and returning to a model of oral examinations. Each student meets with the instructor (small classes) or 1-2 TAs in a team of several (larger classes) and basically take an oral examination. Examinations can be recorded for review if there are complains/questions afterward. But then I thought about how many students these days have anxiety-related or similar concerns if not full out accommodations and how much that would probably increase if students knew they'd regularly have to do oral examinations. Additionally, it may be hard to have every student receive fair, equal-difficulty tests without giving them the same questions to answer, yet if you give them all the same questions it would be difficult to prevent early test takers from telling others what they will be asked. So I am curious, what do y'all see as the way forward in a world of AI bots doing homework? | 98f94f0c4e2eab5306ad2b1ef0ba0e27bb74b8ef605694ec4172e89cd8aa8b55 | [
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"content": "What do you think the \"outcome\" of trying to prevent cheating via AI will look like? I was just glancing at this post and it's gotten me thinking about what happens when AI is well-developed enough to be virtually \"uncatchable.\" Right now AI can make up legit-looking but not real sources so th... | 10 | 7.666667 | {
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What do you think the "outcome" of trying to prevent cheating via AI will look like? I was just glancing at this post and it's gotten me thinking about what happens when AI is well-developed enough to be virtually "uncatchable." Right now AI can make up legit-looking but not real sources so they're easy to check by just looking up the citations. Additionally, IME many AI-generated pieces are fairly stilted in their language use. But some day that won't be the case. In fact, some day it may be possible that AI can essentially create an otherwise legitimate, well-done paper (as in, pull real sources together and create a novel document from them) with little student input. How do you think higher ed will adapt? (I'm thinking mostly about teaching/testing students, but if you want to talk about research and scientific writing, feel free!) I feel like if we can somehow get away from this "college is to get a job" so that many/most students don't actually care about the learning but are just there to check a box we might be able to just generally reduce the impetus to cheat in general, but that will require some significant societal change. I was thinking that in many fields that might ask you to write a paper (as opposed to sit an exam during class time where you couldn't access an AI bot) we may benefit from giving up the "arms race" and returning to a model of oral examinations. Each student meets with the instructor (small classes) or 1-2 TAs in a team of several (larger classes) and basically take an oral examination. Examinations can be recorded for review if there are complains/questions afterward. But then I thought about how many students these days have anxiety-related or similar concerns if not full out accommodations and how much that would probably increase if students knew they'd regularly have to do oral examinations. Additionally, it may be hard to have every student receive fair, equal-difficulty tests without giving them the same questions to answer, yet if you give them all the same questions it would be difficult to prevent early test takers from telling others what they will be asked. So I am curious, what do y'all see as the way forward in a world of AI bots doing homework? | 98f94f0c4e2eab5306ad2b1ef0ba0e27bb74b8ef605694ec4172e89cd8aa8b55 | [
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What do you think the "outcome" of trying to prevent cheating via AI will look like? I was just glancing at this post and it's gotten me thinking about what happens when AI is well-developed enough to be virtually "uncatchable." Right now AI can make up legit-looking but not real sources so they're easy to check by just looking up the citations. Additionally, IME many AI-generated pieces are fairly stilted in their language use. But some day that won't be the case. In fact, some day it may be possible that AI can essentially create an otherwise legitimate, well-done paper (as in, pull real sources together and create a novel document from them) with little student input. How do you think higher ed will adapt? (I'm thinking mostly about teaching/testing students, but if you want to talk about research and scientific writing, feel free!) I feel like if we can somehow get away from this "college is to get a job" so that many/most students don't actually care about the learning but are just there to check a box we might be able to just generally reduce the impetus to cheat in general, but that will require some significant societal change. I was thinking that in many fields that might ask you to write a paper (as opposed to sit an exam during class time where you couldn't access an AI bot) we may benefit from giving up the "arms race" and returning to a model of oral examinations. Each student meets with the instructor (small classes) or 1-2 TAs in a team of several (larger classes) and basically take an oral examination. Examinations can be recorded for review if there are complains/questions afterward. But then I thought about how many students these days have anxiety-related or similar concerns if not full out accommodations and how much that would probably increase if students knew they'd regularly have to do oral examinations. Additionally, it may be hard to have every student receive fair, equal-difficulty tests without giving them the same questions to answer, yet if you give them all the same questions it would be difficult to prevent early test takers from telling others what they will be asked. So I am curious, what do y'all see as the way forward in a world of AI bots doing homework? | 98f94f0c4e2eab5306ad2b1ef0ba0e27bb74b8ef605694ec4172e89cd8aa8b55 | [
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What do you think the "outcome" of trying to prevent cheating via AI will look like? I was just glancing at this post and it's gotten me thinking about what happens when AI is well-developed enough to be virtually "uncatchable." Right now AI can make up legit-looking but not real sources so they're easy to check by just looking up the citations. Additionally, IME many AI-generated pieces are fairly stilted in their language use. But some day that won't be the case. In fact, some day it may be possible that AI can essentially create an otherwise legitimate, well-done paper (as in, pull real sources together and create a novel document from them) with little student input. How do you think higher ed will adapt? (I'm thinking mostly about teaching/testing students, but if you want to talk about research and scientific writing, feel free!) I feel like if we can somehow get away from this "college is to get a job" so that many/most students don't actually care about the learning but are just there to check a box we might be able to just generally reduce the impetus to cheat in general, but that will require some significant societal change. I was thinking that in many fields that might ask you to write a paper (as opposed to sit an exam during class time where you couldn't access an AI bot) we may benefit from giving up the "arms race" and returning to a model of oral examinations. Each student meets with the instructor (small classes) or 1-2 TAs in a team of several (larger classes) and basically take an oral examination. Examinations can be recorded for review if there are complains/questions afterward. But then I thought about how many students these days have anxiety-related or similar concerns if not full out accommodations and how much that would probably increase if students knew they'd regularly have to do oral examinations. Additionally, it may be hard to have every student receive fair, equal-difficulty tests without giving them the same questions to answer, yet if you give them all the same questions it would be difficult to prevent early test takers from telling others what they will be asked. So I am curious, what do y'all see as the way forward in a world of AI bots doing homework? | 98f94f0c4e2eab5306ad2b1ef0ba0e27bb74b8ef605694ec4172e89cd8aa8b55 | [
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