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[879.76 --> 886.50] And anyway, the point is it, the movie seems to be more about Tom Cruise's hair and how
[886.50 --> 888.46] majestically it flows in the wind.
[888.54 --> 888.84] Okay.
[888.98 --> 891.44] And less about any kind of advancement of plot.
[891.52 --> 891.66] Okay.
[891.72 --> 892.30] Spoiler alert.
[892.40 --> 894.46] Not that I'm saying anyone should watch this movie anyway.
[894.54 --> 894.98] It's awful.
[895.58 --> 896.68] Um, so spoiler alert.
[896.76 --> 897.72] Here comes the plot.
[898.50 --> 902.36] Um, there's some MacGuffin that is bad.
[902.36 --> 902.64] Yep.
[902.64 --> 907.60] And there was a guy trying to transport aforementioned MacGuffin.
[907.74 --> 907.86] Yep.
[908.42 --> 910.84] Um, in his bloodstream.
[910.92 --> 911.94] It's a disease MacGuffin.
[912.08 --> 912.32] Okay.
[912.40 --> 912.64] Okay.
[912.90 --> 913.56] So he's like.
[913.90 --> 914.06] Yeah.
[914.12 --> 914.26] Okay.
[914.26 --> 916.80] So the plane he's on gets hijacked.
[916.92 --> 917.58] He dies.
[917.70 --> 918.70] They steal the MacGuffin.
[918.82 --> 921.00] But oh no, it turns out they only got half of it.
[921.34 --> 926.70] So stuff was actually happening at the beginning, but none of this is really explained.
[926.70 --> 929.46] Because with the aforementioned face covering malarkey.
[929.56 --> 929.84] Yes.
[930.18 --> 935.64] Um, it seems like Tom Cruise is actually the guy stealing the MacGuffin up until he rips
[935.64 --> 936.02] off the face.
[936.08 --> 938.70] We have no idea who this guy is and he just kind of takes off.
[939.30 --> 940.90] And you're like, okay, but like stuff's happening.
[941.54 --> 941.84] Okay.
[942.44 --> 944.14] So all that happens in like the first five minutes.
[944.46 --> 947.44] Over the entire rest of the movie.
[947.44 --> 955.36] Literally, literally all that happens is they, wait, am I getting the, am I getting the third
[955.36 --> 956.90] one and the second one confused now?
[957.24 --> 959.06] What the hell does happen in the second one?
[959.12 --> 959.28] Right.
[959.80 --> 960.50] He could, okay.
[960.54 --> 967.90] So he convinces the guy's ex to help him seduce the guy who like has it.
[968.40 --> 973.62] And then she gets in with him, but then he figures out she's working with Tom Cruise.
[973.62 --> 982.16] And then ultimately he captures her and she takes the MacGuffin, which she has now for
[982.16 --> 984.94] some reason during a firefight, injects it into herself.
[985.40 --> 992.58] And then, um, there's like this weird car chase and then Tom Cruise and the bad guy literally
[992.58 --> 996.64] joust with motorcycles, leap off their motorcycles, collide in the air.
[996.86 --> 997.06] Nice.
[997.08 --> 998.60] And then fist fight to the death.
[998.72 --> 999.16] Nice.
[999.38 --> 1002.76] And then they get the cure from him because he had the cure, but not the disease.
[1002.76 --> 1003.68] And then they cure her.
[1004.06 --> 1006.08] That is two hours of cinema.
[1007.46 --> 1011.20] And Tom Cruise's hair is admittedly majestic.
[1011.20 --> 1012.26] Just wonderful the whole time.
[1012.30 --> 1012.54] Yes.
[1012.72 --> 1013.28] On point.
[1013.32 --> 1017.24] His stylist must've had the, the, the hairspray.
[1017.52 --> 1021.44] No, not, not hairspray because it was too, it was too beautiful for hairspray.
[1021.54 --> 1021.70] Yeah.
[1022.70 --> 1023.10] Something.
[1023.26 --> 1026.60] I don't know what product they were using in his hair, but if they could bottle that
[1026.60 --> 1027.22] and sell it.
[1027.26 --> 1028.26] That should've been a main ad.
[1028.34 --> 1029.78] Like product placement throughout the whole film.
[1029.78 --> 1032.02] It should've just like gone hard with it.
[1032.02 --> 1032.80] He had a comb though.
[1033.16 --> 1033.80] He had a comb.
[1034.10 --> 1036.98] He was like right out of frame the entire time.
[1037.08 --> 1037.42] Guaranteed.
[1037.54 --> 1037.64] Yeah.
[1037.90 --> 1038.00] Yeah.
[1038.50 --> 1038.90] Um.
[1039.02 --> 1040.84] Should've been the first person on the credits list.
[1040.88 --> 1042.18] I don't remember what I was talking about.
[1042.48 --> 1042.80] Anyway.
[1042.98 --> 1043.20] Right.
[1043.38 --> 1047.90] So the third movie is then directed by, um, what's his face?
[1048.08 --> 1049.38] Star Trek and Star Wars.
[1049.66 --> 1050.06] JJ Abrams?
[1050.06 --> 1050.24] Yeah.
[1050.32 --> 1050.62] Thank you.
[1050.68 --> 1051.30] JJ Abrams.
[1053.04 --> 1053.48] Yes!
[1053.48 --> 1056.10] I got one.
[1057.68 --> 1064.32] So I forget where I was going with this, but these three movies have the least in common,
[1064.64 --> 1073.60] like thematically, like the tone, the style that I have ever seen in any sequels at all.
[1073.94 --> 1076.98] They just have nothing to do with each other.
[1076.98 --> 1079.86] So the first one is kind of like a spy thriller.
[1080.02 --> 1081.06] There's almost no violence.
[1081.32 --> 1081.58] Okay.
[1081.80 --> 1086.66] The second one is just like people punching each other endlessly.
[1086.86 --> 1087.50] And wonderful hair.
[1087.62 --> 1088.78] And then, and wonderful hair.
[1088.88 --> 1095.56] And then the third one plays kind of like your, your bog standard modern action flick.
[1095.98 --> 1102.40] Like it's, it's, it's, it's sort of well shot, like artfully shot, but it doesn't try too hard.
[1102.40 --> 1103.04] Pause, pause, pause.
[1103.22 --> 1104.76] Someone said, where did Luke get his shirt?
[1104.76 --> 1106.54] Oh, that's funny.
[1106.80 --> 1108.00] Um, well.
[1108.26 --> 1109.20] We should come back to this.