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**Mireille Reece, PsyD:** Yes. |
**Adam Stacoviak:** "I should have this thing back. We should be done with this thing." Whatever, yeah. |
**Mireille Reece, PsyD:** Yeah. |
**Adam Stacoviak:** Well, the question that we got to ask ourselves is if you're in that situation, particularly the workplace, what can you do? What do you do? Well, maybe you quit. That's maybe the easy button, or the hard button, depending upon which perspective you're taking. But Darren Murph, actually, he was on t... |
**Mireille Reece, PsyD:** \[40:06\] Yeah, but see how at the top they set the standard, and then reinforce it in terms of their responses or behavior. And so, power is a component of day to day lives, but it doesn't have to be a construct that's binary like, "If you have it, I don't" that everything is zero-sum. "Well,... |
**Adam Stacoviak:** Yeah. One thing that I can't help but say is what this does for them in particular is-- we talked about this before in prepping for this call, is when you encounter these kinds of people, these egotistical people, these narcissistic folks... Not that they're bad people; I don't want to remove them f... |
**Mireille Reece, PsyD:** Right. And so recognizing that they can play a lesser of a role in your life... And ironically, you could actually be empathetic to them and go, "You know what--" I mean so many things I think about, like my phase of life with kids movies, but it's like in the movie Ferdinand... At the very en... |
**Adam Stacoviak:** His power. |
**Mireille Reece, PsyD:** Yeah. |
**Adam Stacoviak:** His lack of using his power is his power. |
**Mireille Reece, PsyD:** Right. So I'm not going to engage you in a way in which it has to be a battle relative to you getting the attaboys that you need like, "Go ahead, you can have them. But I'm gonna work hard and do my job because it's important to me, because it's important to the product or the task or other pe... |
**Adam Stacoviak:** You deflate their balloon, essentially. You don't you don't allow it to have the air to be the balloon. |
**Mireille Reece, PsyD:** Yeah, like they can go ahead and they can do that. So it's figuring out how to work alongside. Usually, where this is a challenge for people - there was something that was awry way earlier on in their life, and so if you could see it as just impoverished coping... They just didn't learn a bett... |
**Adam Stacoviak:** Sometimes their power is derived from the reaction, particular reactions, and if your reaction is not at all a reaction that fuels their sense of being the way they are, you're not giving fuel to the fire, essentially; you're sort of like taking it away. |
**Mireille Reece, PsyD:** Right. And so think about how can you apply that in your daily life? Asking yourself questions is an awesome strategy relative to reflecting, and even you can ask your board of advisors, those five people, three to five people like, "Give me feedback. Can I be more adept or relate better to yo... |
I think it's important that people recognize that part of empathy involves hearing somebody else's perspective that you might think is impaired or inaccurate, but it's filtered through their lens. So I can't say that somebody else's lens isn't right; it's a lens that was built, and this is why it's so amazing with how ... |
• The challenges of pandemic life and its impact on mental health |
• The importance of self-care and being intentional about daily activities |
• The need to adjust to changing circumstances and be adaptable |
• The value of forethought and planning for the future |
• Defining self-care according to the World Health Organization's definition |
• Common misconceptions about self-care, such as it being selfish or indulgent |
• Misconceptions about self-care being selfish |
• Importance of prioritizing self-care for physical and mental well-being |
• Categorization of self-care into emotional, physical, and spiritual aspects |
• Research on the role of self-care in preventing chronic diseases (60-70%) |
• Overcoming barriers to practicing self-care, including lack of understanding or resources |
• Misconceptions and misunderstandings about self-care and wellness |
• Time and financial barriers to prioritizing self-care |
• Self-expectations and perfectionism as a barrier to self-care |
• Importance of being deliberate and purposeful in planning for self-care |
• Accountability and support systems in achieving self-care goals |
• Recognizing the benefits of small, regular actions towards self-care, rather than all-or-nothing approaches |
• Momentum and inertia in personal development |
• The importance of self-awareness and reflection |
• Habit formation and the role of motivation in sustaining habits |
• Qualifying self-care and distinguishing between happiness and joy |
• Optimizing for joy and considering long-term payouts |
• Endurance and pain in achieving goals, and whether it's worth it to focus on joy |
• The concept of waste and being wasteful in neglecting one's own well-being |
• Treating oneself with respect and care, like a unique individual (the "N=1" principle) |
• Recognizing the importance of "margin" in managing life's stressors and making prudent choices |
• Understanding that coping doesn't mean being perfect or white-knuckling, but rather having some buffer to deal with adversity |
• The relationship between having a strong life purpose and decreased mortality rates |
• The idea of reverse-engineering one's goals by imagining oneself at an older age and asking "How do I wanna be?" |
• Recognizing that emotional self-care can be more challenging than physical care due to societal stigma |
• Identifying personal indicators for when it's time to take care of one's emotional well-being. |
• Developing strategies for coping with stress and overwhelm |
• Caring for one's community through selfless acts |
• Recognizing how to provide meaningful support to others |
• Using "what's in your hand" principle to give without expectation of receiving something back |
• Importance of self-care during challenging times, such as restricted connections |
• Creating a personal self-care plan and scheduling time for it |
• Prioritizing and accounting for self-care activities through calendaring or inviting others |
**Mireille Reece, PsyD:** Good morning, Adam. How are you? |
**Adam Stacoviak:** I am trying to do well. |
**Mireille Reece, PsyD:** I love that, "trying" to do well... Aren't we all, these days? \[laughter\] |
**Adam Stacoviak:** Just trying really hard to do well... |
**Mireille Reece, PsyD:** Hey, I showed up. Isn't that what matters? |
**Adam Stacoviak:** That is what matters, yeah. I think showing up is -- it's like G.I. Joe, it's half the battle. |
**Mireille Reece, PsyD:** It is, and yet I think it's really harder - harder, dare I say - nowadays than what it was once upon a time, prior to pandemic life. |
**Adam Stacoviak:** Yeah... Pandemic life is kind of weird; it really is. Because it's like "Am I crazy? We've kind of been doing this for a while... Is it normal? Is it not normal?" And it's not normal, but it's normal... And then it depends. We talk internationally to people, so people in New Zealand and still dealin... |
**Mireille Reece, PsyD:** Right. Well, and definitely here in the U.S. things are highly varied amidst states and cities and counties... But I think the thing that is common as a thread throughout all is just things are still different. And when things are different, it means we have to adjust; either accommodate, or w... |
**Adam Stacoviak:** Well, I can tell you one thing - it's certainly given me a new perspective on our exact topic, self-care, and a better appreciation of it... Because never have I needed to rally steep myself in self-care and understand it more so for me than now, because of all the moving objects and moving targets ... |
**Mireille Reece, PsyD:** \[04:34\] Yeah, I would say that there's a different sort of way in which we all can benefit from being more deliberate... And that's challenging, because that requires forethought. Not just what's on my list today, because you know, just many less things are automated in the way in which they... |
**Adam Stacoviak:** Yeah, I like your idea of forethought; it does take a lot of forethought to not just check off what's on my list today, but what's tomorrow, or next week like. Because I feel like if you're behind the ball, and maybe even phoning it in some case, because you're just overwhelmed, or you're just lonel... |
**Mireille Reece, PsyD:** Right. And that sense of uncertainty or lack of predictability is exactly what contributes to the challenges, both psychologically and emotionally... Because like we've talked about before, how we see things has to do with what we focus on... So I can be looking at or trying to navigate all of... |
**Adam Stacoviak:** Well, I like the aspect of nourishment, too. What's the point of eating food? |
**Mireille Reece, PsyD:** Right. |
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