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Throwaway account because he'd likely see it if i posted with my main acc.
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some context- I've been doing freelance art for years and usually I charge, say, $90 per character in a piece or more depending on other stuff. My bf didn't know I drew when we started dating and didn't seem to care all that much ... | NTA - Art is a luxury, if he wants it he should pay like any other customer. No one is entitled to art. Keep on drawing and I'm glad you have so many commissions! I know it's a throw away account but I'd love to see some of your art if possible. ###### |
So growing up I had one of the most loving mothers one could as for, maybe even a little too much. Except for times when she had her episodes. She has schizophrenia, bipolar disorder and some other mental ilnesess I forgot about. But for most part, she is very normal and sane, due to her meds. But that's the pr... | NTA - And yeah, these situations just plain suck.
The fact is that schizophrenia simply cannot be cured, and it's SO common for sufferers to get stuck in that endless cycle of take meds, get better, quit meds, go off the deep end, get rescued, take meds, get better, etc etc etc
In my experience, when someone i... |
So last month I bought a condo in DC. As I was a nervous first time buyer, I went wayyy overboard in due diligence, reading every document through and through. I move in and I’m happy, but two of my window’s screw cranks for opening up are broken. Now the condo documents clearly state that windows and the main door are... | NTA - and they most certainly would push if the situation were reversed. ###### |
So I (26M) ate something bad last night and had to spend a majority of the evening and this morning in the bathroom because I was sick. My girlfriend (24F) came and stayed over this weekend because it had been a while since we saw each other. As I mentioned above I had to spend a majority of the morning in the bathroom... | NTA - and I gotta say: People who only want you at your best, and aren’t there for you when you’re at your worst, don’t deserve you at all ###### |
Obligatory throwaway and such.
I have severe phobias and delusions related to things like hacking, surveillance, government monitoring, along with things like cameras and microphones. It's a legitimate phobia, I'm in therapy and am on medications.
My family has been trying to arrange many group Zoom meetings lately a... | NTA - and I don’t think the other people saying ‘use Skype’ or another app understand that’s it’s not just zoom, but (from what I gather) paranoia about surveillance in general. I would recommend asking your therapist for advice on how to approach this with your family. But you know your family best and if you believe... |
Pretty simple story.
I recently bought condoms with my face. Not exactly bought, but a friend gave me a gift card to this website. I just went to a website, submitted a photo, and voila. In 3 months I got a package of around 1000 condoms.
I didn’t know what to do with that many condoms. So, I just gave a lot of the... | NTA - and definitely not the equivalent of cheating. It seems more like a joke, it seems pretty funny to me. If things got hot and heavy and my friend's face appeared on a condom I'd bust out in laughter
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EDIT: Damn 3.4k upvotes on a post about condoms... Interesting... OP mail me one of your condoms ###### |
My cousin's birthday is coming up and she had asked me about a week ago if I'd be willing to to draw her OC's (orginal characters) for her instead of getting her a present. I normally never agree to do free work for people, because it can very quickly snowball out of control if someone heard I was doing free work, but ... | NTA - and am I the prude here or does it seem icky to give orignal NSFW ideas to a family member to draw for you? Sharing a NSFW joke you find on the internet is one thing... this is not that. It's more like going to your cousin and saying "here's my most intimate sexual fantasies. Want to draw them for me so I can re... |
So I stayed at my boyfriends place (it's in a different city) for 18 days exactly so under 3 weeks and for the bills of the house it's normally £40 each for three of them each month. So £120 in total.
I did my bit and pay £30 to contribute to this bill (which is for a month and just 18 days) so I paid bills for a long... | NTA - An amount was agreed and it sounds like you've paid most of your boyfriend's share of the bills for that period. It sounds like they're trying to retroactively get you to pay theirs as well. Additionally, it's not like you just sat there and ramped up the bills. You did the housework for them and did they thank ... |
A little backstory:
My sister and I rent a three story house with 5 bedrooms and 1 bathroom. When we looked at the house, it was agreed that the 3rd story would be mine as I'm paying half the rent and utilities, and was witnessed by my mother and her son. I'm a very anxious person and an introvert, so the 3rd story was... | Nta - also, the “extra bedroom” is not ‘extra’ or a ‘bedroom’ It is your ‘whatever’ room and is not available. Why does your sister think she has any claim to it? If she thinks that she is just renting you a room in her house, why is she charging you half the rent and extras on top? You are being taken advantage of he... |
For context, I’m a 16M and have an iPad Pro, which is quite pricy, and I don’t want to have it broken or scratched up. This is why I prefer to watch him with my tablet if he wants to use it, because I can stop him if he gets too rough. Not only that but I have personal shit on there that I don’t want to be shown to my ... | NTA - After your added info it is evident that rightfully it should belong to you. Calmly explain to your parents that not only was this a gift intended for you, you also contributed to buy it. You're happy to watch your brother use it just to make sure it doesn't get scratched because you can't afford to fix it or re... |
I’ve always struggled at school since I was a kid, I would drift off and daydream or get distracted and fidget and forget what I was supposed to be doing, or just be really restless and it would annoy people. My teachers suggested I get tested a few times, but my parents don’t really believe in ADHD, they think it’s ju... | NTA - ADHD is a very real thing and your parents are serious AHs for making you go through your entire School career this way. ###### |
So I dated a YouTuber.
We went out for about a year and it was alright but they were so emotionally invested in their channel that they constantly neglected me and made me feel like I wasn't a priority.
Not really important why we broke up, but we broke up.
Then I get a bunch of messages from friends about 3 months ... | NTA - Actions have consequences. Her "content" could have ruined YOUR life, but nobody thinks about that huh? ###### |
I have asked my spouse to cut off communication between themselves, my children, and my father. I've presented this same scenario to a few different people, and the response is generally the same. I'm a big ole asshole.
About a year ago, I came out to my father as transgender. I've been transitioning for much longer t... | NTA - absolutely not. I don't think I have to point this out but obviously your dad is the asshole here.
I completely get where your spouse is coming from. Maybe rather than it being "business as usual" for your spouse and children, you could agree with your spouse a level of communications that you both feel comfort... |
I'm (28,m) gay, and my friend, Sara (23,f) is a good friend of mine. She's pretty and quite popular etc etc and it got to a point where she had to file restraining order for TWO stalkers. I've known her for a while now and she's a good friend in general. One day she asked me about my type of man I'm attracted to. I tol... | NTA - a joke is a joke, but even jokes can be pushed to the point of not being funny. Seemed you handled it well, she just didnt like the "rejection". ###### |
My (f17) sister (f34) and her husband (m37) have been staying at my parents house for a couple of months, mom absolutely loves having my sister at her home she's given her and husband a very big welcome and cooked their favorite meals everyday.
While staying at home, feeling bored I decided to do a "makeover" and give... | NTA - a grown man bullying a young girl. Wow, what an ass. ###### |
(This happened a while ago, no big weddings during a pandemic for me, dw!)
I (24F) was the maid of honour at the wedding of my brother and his wife (my sister in law).
While we were planning the wedding, my SIL mentioned how overbearing her mom can be, and how she always feels bad asking her to stop being an attent... | NTA - a fucking standing ovation to you! Holy shit that is AMAZING. Ni you are not the asshole, you are a fantastic friend and a dutiful maid of honor. You are the reason this post is here and not on one of those “how did your mom completely ruin your wedding?” threads. ###### |
I went off on my boyfriend for him mentioning his weight preferences
My boyfriend pointed out that my stomach looks a bit round in a playful manner, since I’m bloated bc of pms. I ask if he likes it and he said that it’s cute, but he prefers a slimmer look. This doesn’t seem like a hurtful comment but this is the 5th... | NTA - “You want a slim girlfriend. I want a considerate boyfriend. Not everyone gets what they want all the time.” ###### |
So I get a snap from him, saying he “missed me”. I admit, I shouldn’t have been so rude because I said, “Miss me? You never talked to me and when you did you were insulting me or my appearance” And he said “I’m sorry if I hurt you” which is one of my pet peeves. And he kept pressing me asking me to forgive him and how ... | NTA - “I’m sorry if I hurt you”? What a b.s. apology. ###### |
So recently I (25M) made a post on my facebook about how my student loan debt was nearly whipped. Paid off my first one last year, and as of right now, it looks like I can get this last one paid off by the time I get out of the army at the end of this year.
So naturally I wanted to share the good news with everyone.
... | NTA - “Comparison is the thief of joy”. This isn’t about them. It’s about you. They should be happy for you instead of being jealous. if you couldn’t share an accomplishment because it might upset someone else who hasn’t accomplished it.. you would literally never be able to share anything ever. ###### |
I’m (29f) going to get married this September (if a certain unnamed virus let us). For important context, I am white but my fiancée (31m) is Chinese-American. I’m going to admit that I’m one of those girls who has been planning her dream wedding since I was a girl.
My husband doesn’t care as much and told me that I co... | NTA -
That's absurd. It sounds like this tea ceremony is basically part of the wedding. I'd be more understanding if they were hesitant or nervous about messing something up, but it sounds like they're just being stubborn and controlling.
I say stand your ground. They're overstepping their boundaries here and if ba... |
So first and foremost I must say my parents are amazing but their siblings and parents aren't as great as my parents are. When I was younger I had always wanted to be with my Aunt's and grandparents to spend time with them yet they would always ignore me in favor of my cousin who was a year older than me. At that point... | NTA -
> I feel like I'm justified in thinking this but I still feel a little like an asshole. Everyone tells me that I need to get over it because they are blood. But blood doesn't always mean family right?
You summed it up perfectly yourself. Whilst you aren't an asshole here in my opinion, and just because someo... |
When I say every single time, I mean every single time she does it in front of me and it's becoming a problem with the family because they think I'm being disrespectful and she's old and doesn't get it. Even my husband is like "I agree with you but she won't budge so just let it go"
No I dont think I will.
My son is... | NTA - "they're just old, they don't get it" is bullshit. It means they've lived through every major Equal Rights protest in modern history and haven't bothered to learn anything.
You're doing the right thing by advocating for your son and refusing to let someone disrespect his gender identity. His mental health is w... |
For background, i have 2 horses. Both are older (mid to late 20s), but one is very old (nearing 30), small (just above pony size and just under 1000 lbs) and has some back and hip issues. She is still in great shape for her age, is very muscular, and still enjoys riding. We trail ride up the mountains near our barn, us... | NTA - horses are not cars. Weight matters ###### |
My husband and I have been married for 4 years and instead of having a wedding we eloped.
My mother was completely devastated. No one else in my family really cared, everyone was very happy that we got married. For the past 4 years my mother has been asking us to have a “real” wedding. She says it’s completely unfai... | NTA You're not a doll for her to play dress-up with.
A marriage is the important thing. A wedding, not so much. Your priorities seem great to me.
Stealing your dress, wearing it, taking photos, showing them around, and remarking on how she looked better...wow. If you needed any proof that "your" wedding would just ... |
My 23 year old daughter and her husband moved in with us a few months ago. I'll call them Josh and Ashley. My husband and Josh do not get along for a lot of reasons. Some of them are valid, like Josh does not contribute financially, he is rude and ignorant, and he has allegedly cheated on our daughter. They also don't ... | NTA You son in law poked the wrong bear. If he did want to start shit he should be f8cking around with the guy who lets him live there. ###### |
My husband (30M) and I (26F) have been together for about 5 years but married for 2. In the early start of our relationship, I wanted to make sure my in laws be okay with my race (African American), and he assured me that they would be. Every month for the past 2 years of us being married, I have encountered a racial w... | NTA The fact that your husband has been ok with this going on for two years says quite a lot, doesn't it? Not to mention that he actually defends his father! I'm sorry your husband has failed you like this OP, at this point he actually has to make a choice. ###### |
I (f/20) am planning to move together with a friend (same age) of mine next summer, once I have graduated.
My parents do know this said friend, as we know each other since high school. At first, my parents once I confronted them about my plans, didn't say anything and were actually even happy that I won't live lonely ... | NTA Phew, your parents did a number on you! It is not okay to ask a child to continue living with you because you lose income if they leave. Parenting is all about doing everything you can to prepare your child for adulthood. That means leaving home when you are old enough and financially ready. GTFO!!! ###### |
So I'm new to this sub and I apologize in advance for any formatting mistakes.
My friend (22f) texted me a video of this good looking dude she saw at a restaurant. I noticed that she seemed to be recording over someone's shoulder so I texted her about it and she told me she was on a date with her boyfriend.
Her boyf... | NTA Hugely disrespectful to her boyfriend, and also just creepy in general. Filming/photographing a stranger in public because they are hot is just gross. ###### |
My dad passed away last year on my birthday, I was very close with him and am still getting through this loss. I had told my husband and family that the only thing I want for my birthday this year is to just be left alone and mourn if I need to or to relax and have some time to myself. I don’t want to fake being happy ... | NTA How incredibly rude and self-centered of your relatives, to think that they can dictate how you grieve. Stick to your guns. Get your husband to run interference on your behalf if they don't want to listen to you. But don't go to please other people. ###### |
Okay so basically my mum is absolutely furious with me and thinks I’m a shit stirrer, but I’m a huge believer in consent and that people should, you know, be aware of what goes into their mouths.
My mum has been making a stew for all of us for years and years, and tbh it’s ok. It’s not amazing, it’s not vile, but it ... | NTA Hmmm on the one hand there's nothing wrong with those foods but on the other hand she shouldn't be shifty about what she feeds people ###### |
I (23F) bought a house last year in a fairly well-off area (not a neighborhood though). My cousin (21F) has been living with me for the past 3 months because of financial issues: she pays a bit of rents and helps me do housework around the house. She's a really nice person in general.
On the Fourth of July, she brough... | NTA He was being a selfish prick. You were completely justified in telling him to leave. ###### |
I was just fired from my job that ha given me a company phone. I was not given a chance to remove personal information like passwords and personal accounts off of it. It also had text messages from company contacts and workers. After 12 hours I did a remote erase of the phone being that I still had access to it via fin... | NTA but why would you have your personal stuff on a company phone? ###### |
I work for a property management company, and today we went to do a cleanout of a house that had been evacuated by the previous tenants. Living there previously was a foster mom with six children.
We opened the garage door, and it was filled floor to ceiling with rotting trash and crap and smelled absolutely foul.... | NTA At first I was thinking "state of her home" meant clothes on the floor or messy counters. You're talking dead deer carcass left to rot beneath a bunch of mattresses?
You would be the AH if you did not contact someone about them. ###### |
I’m (18) currently living with my parents since my college has been shut down. My older brother (20) lives with my parents, too.
I’ve been staying in my old room while my parents have made the basement into an apartment-style room for my brother. Basically, he has a small fridge, microwave and bathroom down there.
... | NTA as someone who is an older brother of girls, it's not funny or acceptable at all and if caught one of my brothers looking at one of my sisters, i would have threw him out in the garden and gave him a smack or two.
At his age, it is pretty serious and i would consider telling your parents very soon, it is actuall... |
So I was in a chat group with a bunch of my high school friends and some other people. We were just talking about old times and things like that.
One of them brought up how his sister who is going to the same school as us probably won’t get to have a real graduation this year.
I said that sucked.
This one girl Tali... | NTA $60 is a lot to a high school student. Hell, it could be a lot for some adults. If she was a close friend and you had the money, it would be one thing, but she was only an acquaintance.
And she had the money, but she "lost it" before she could pay her fee? Why is that your fault?! Are you also the only per... |
I love kids but I want a kid free night. My family won’t stop asking if they can bring there kids and I say no kids allowed every time. My cousins are calling me an asshole and selfish for not letting them come. They said they should be allowed to bring there kids because they are well behaved and don’t want to pay for... | NTA — It’s your wedding. They don’t have to come if they don’t want to abide by the wedding rules. Also though, and I can’t stress this enough, you don’t have any right to be upset if some people don’t come because of this rule. But no, you’re NTA. I hope you have an amazing wedding. ###### |
So me and my sister were jogging.......or well I was she was on her little scooter following me lol. When we got back she was bored when I was watching tv and started to climb all over me. I humored her and we were wrestling for a little bit (I am the tickle attack king lol). As we were wrestling and goofing off I s... | NTA
You weren't parenting. You were being a good big sister.
I think your mom might be overly worried that your sister might get weird ideas about sexuality. But calling her in to take care of this minor issue would make it into a much bigger deal than it was in the first place.
IMO a seven year old is plenty ol... |
So, my daughter's Father owes a ton of back child support. Part of the outstanding balance is taken from his paychecks along with each current payment. It's not enough to pay it all back before she's 18, but it is deducted nevertheless. Anyway, he got a letter in the mail from the US Treasury Dept telling him that they... | NTA
The money isn't his, never was his, and him not keeping track of the fact that he wasn't going to receive it (because he is a still technically a deadbeat with support in arrears) is entirely his own fault and not yours or your responsibility to rectify.
Take the money, take care of your kid with it as it i... |
So I (m33) met my wife (f34) 10 years ago in high school via a friend. She introduced me to Fleetwood Mac, and one of my favorite songs is "black magic woman" and as a cute nickname, i started calling her that.. She thought it was funny, and it's been a cute little inside joke between us.
She's half Colombian, Half Ja... | NTA
Jesus. Mentioning race is not the same as demeaning, belittling, insulting or otherwise being unkind to that race. If you point to Denzel Washington and say "he's black", that isn't racist. It's weird, but not racist.
"Magic woman" sure as shit isn't insulting.
"Black Magic" doesn't even refer to skin ... |
Okay so long story short, I'm basically flat chested A cup. My boyfriend and I argue alot, and one of the things he constantly points out it that I don't wear a bra.
They're uncomfortable for me because they're always too big, they look and feel stupid on me and I just hate them. He commented in an argument that I wo... | NTA
but from the sound of it and what I read in the comments, he is manipulating you and you need to GET OUT. ###### |
My husband and I (early 30s) extended our lease for 6 months back in February, planning to buy a house between then and July. Our landlords are selling our house, so they will not extend further. Unfortunately, my husband was furloughed, so we’ve put the house hunt on hold until he’s landed a new gig.
We live in the s... | NTA
You said your MIL is 'difficult' and 'overbearing' and what you tell seems you are right.
If they just offered to do you a favor, they wouldn't be upset.
It seems like they tried to catch you and control you. Be careful. Don't be too close is the right decision. ###### |
Long story short:
I had a girlfriend just short of 2 years (ended last summer, last contact in October). Things got ugly and ended on bad terms (I think). She basically destroyed me and my plans and I was left in a dark hole and on the verge of losing it completely for many months before I slowly recovered (she happil... | NTA
Owned. ###### |
Me and her (f) have been friends for a while but one day f decided to spread a malicious rumour about me. I wont go into detail but it caused me a lot of suffering in school.
F said privately to me that she felt bad about what was happening (bear in mind that this was weeks after things started escalating) and I would... | NTA
Lying for no reason is wrong, especially when it's caused you so much grief. I think you were completely justified in bringing her lies to light. Doesn't matter what gender they are or what the lie was about - The fact is that she lied, and she had no reason to really do so. Awful Rumours are not okay, even if... |
On the last day before lock down I called in to work because I needed to get my nan an ambulance. She could only maintain consciousness for 10-15 seconds at a time. I've lived with her for 3 years and became her carer when she was diagnosed with pulmonary fibrosis.
My nan tested negative for the virus twice so we real... | NTA
I'd say that even if you weren't already going through something so difficult (I am sorry about your nan), you would still not be the asshole for not taking part in their silly activity.
That having been said, asshole or no, these goofy office practices are sadly the way people get noticed and promoted. ... |
My friend was ranting to me about his tinder experience to me, how no one responds to his messages, how his he has been ghosted in the past, women on the app only swipe right on super hot guys, etc. He is generally a laid back person so I was taken aback. I said that he displaying some incel-esque tendencies and should... | NTA
Fuck the "bro code" or any other code they throw at you.
You simply reminded another human being that their lack of success is from their own actions and not because girls are unfair. ###### |
I've been laid off and have spent a lot of time at home cleaning and organizing. Husband is working from home and mentioned that its nice that everything is so clean and we can actually enjoy our days off instead of always having something to do. So we tossed around the idea of hiring a cleaning service once a week or ... | NTA - would your MIL even WANT to clean your house? This seems extremely short-sighted on your husband's behalf. Even if you had the best MIL in the world, it's awkward to have someone you know clean your space with all of your personal items. What would happen if you didn't like the work she did? It's a recipe for d... |
So, that’s is a throwaway, the fact I’m gay has nothing to do with the story, English isn’t my native language, and I’m on my phone.
Let’s get to the actual story; and introduce the characters. Salvi is my boyfriend, mom is my mother, dad is my father, Marie is my sister, I’m 20, as is Salvi.
So, as a child, my mothe... | NTA What your mother has done to you has nothing to do with love. She has been abusing you since you were a child and your father, by being silent and not helping you, has been a part of her abuse. You have nothing to apologise for! The fact that you still tried to help them out says a lot about how nice of a person... |
Day before yesterday i was talking to my grandmother on facetime when we were talking about my cousin (F 26) having a kid. All of a sudden she starts talking about me having kids. For the context i got married at 16 (this is pretty common practice in Arabia and I live in London with my husband). She tells me that i sh... | NAH— it’s a culture clash. You want an education and independence and I applaud you for that. She doesn’t understand the world you live in now. What she’s suggesting was normal, a way for you to have value to your husband’s family, etc. but the world has changed. An educated mother who can support them with a career o... |
I was on an international flight (12 hour flight) a few months ago that was dead empty. Maybe 10% capacity.
I was flying premium economy so I was in the seat just behind business class. I could see the entire section and no one was sitting in it, and maybe only 2 or 3 people were in premium economy with me.
The fli... | NAH— It doesn’t hurt to ask since sometimes it does happen. But expect them to get annoyed.
They get asked ALL the time and it is super annoying. Also if someone sees you do it, they’ll want the same treatment. ###### |
My sister and I live in the same city, but our parents moved to another country for retirement. They flew us out for their anniversary. Our parents buy all of us tickets on the same flight. My sister has two kids - a 6 month old and a 5 year old. She is currently separated from her husband so she would have to handle ... | NAH
It’s reasonable for a family to ask for help and it’s also okay to have boundaries. It would have been nice to help your sister but you were by no means required to. It was also okay for her to feel a bit disappointed with you. ###### |
I (42f) have four kids, (17f, 14m/f twins, 9m). Because of the state of the world right now, my kids have been spending a lot of time at home. They spend a few hours a day doing schoolwork (zoom classes/homework) and spend the rest of the time mostly sitting around and playing video games or reading.
As such, we deci... | NAH
Your son is young, so he probably doesn't have a particularly nuanced understanding of fairness. It sounds like it might be a good idea to explain to him the difference between "equality" and "equity". The division of chores here is unequal, which is likely what's bothering him, since to kids his age equal = fa... |
My daughter and her girlfriend, 19F and 20F, have been together for 8months.
My daughters girlfriend recently kicked her out, I haven't been told why but I'm sure they'd tell me if they wanted me to know.
I said that she could stay and to let me know before she got here so we could all talk.
When I got home she had ... | NAH
Your house, your rules. I assume you’d be the same if it was boy-girl not girl-girl? ###### |
So my gf has been talking for some days about how pretty shaved hair is for girls and about how much she want to do it. (She don’t want people to think she’s a lesbian)
I don’t think it would look good on her, I tried to tell her that, and she got disappointed.
Even though I told her I will still accept her and love h... | NAH
You're allowed to have an opinion, she's allowed to do what she wants to her own head.
You're only the asshole if you start trying to tell her she "can't" do it and attempting to control her style choices. ###### |
When my sister and I were in high school we had a group project where we had to set up a business and make an actual real business plan. The idea for the business was actually pretty cool and we got an A on the project.
A couple years ago I brought up actually doing the business idea, but she didn’t have any money f... | NAH
You took all the financial risk to start it up, but it doesn't sound like there's undue pressure from your family. If they don't let up they may start to be TA. ###### |
My mother was a photographer so needless to say she enjoyed taking photos of me and my siblings. When I turned 13 we ended up having a massive fight over her not respecting my boundaries. Finally after an hour of arguing my said I will not take your picture ever again. Apparently I was the only one who had a problem w... | NAH
You mother respected your wishes and you got what you wanted. You shouldn't be surprised that there aren't any photos of you after a certain point. ###### |
Okay, so I’ve (21M) been seeing the same girl (21F) for 5 years now. Only relationship I’ve ever been in. I think I started questioning my speciality for the first time about halfway through our relationship - but I figured I just be bi. I told her this, and she had zero issue with it at all. But things have been happe... | NAH
You have to be true to yourself and honest with your girlfriend about your sexuality.
She's probably also justified in being upset, given that it's been such a long time.
The rest of your friends should stay out of it as it's really none of their business to judge. ###### |
My husband(38M) and I(37F) have been married 17 years. We have two children, 18M and 13F. Every few years my husband gets what I lovingly call baby fever and wants to have another child. I usually respond with "the baby factory is closed" and he drops it. It tends to only happen more when friends, family, or coworkers ... | NAH
You have an 18 year old and a 13 year old. Does he really want to have a 5-10 year gap between his youngest child and oldest grand child? Also, remind him about grandchildren. ###### |
I was jogging on a trail next to a somewhat busy public street when I saw a young girl crying on a bench. I figured it was best to avoid, but on the way back home, she was still on the same bench, crying. She was about 15. I asked her if she was OK. She said no. I asked if she wanted to talk about it, and she said yes.... | NAH
You did the right thing, but to an onlooker it might not have seemed like that. I'm sorry about the assumptions that people make, but your girlfriend is just looking out for you. But thank you for being such a good person and helping that girl. ###### |
My wife and and I have been trying for a child for months now. We’ve been through 2 miscarriages. Every time it happened it breaks her heart. I know she wants a child more then anything in the world. I do too.
A couple of days ago I learnt I will be losing my father to prostate cancer in 3 - 6 months. Her fertile wi... | NAH
You both are grieving - You your father and her a possible child
Sit down with each other and have a painful talk right now you want to focus on your dad and not divide your attention. Tell your wife you want to fully support and enjoy the pregnancy with her but not with your father’s health problems in full vie... |
My \[45M\] daughter \[17F\] passed away about 8 months ago unexpectedly. My wife \[46F\] and I were completely (and still are) devastated by her passing. We have two other children \[15F\] and \[14M\] who have taken the death of their older sister very hard. I don't think we will ever fully recover from this but slowly... | NAH
You are not invading your late daughters privacy by wanting to remember her and see how she saw the world to help you cope with the loss.
HOWEVER, thats a pandoras box, you have to make sure you are prepared for. You 100% are going to learn things, wonderful, sad, sexual, intimate and very deep stuff. So jus... |
I'm in my 30s and almost all my friends now have babies or young kids. Every time they suggest something social it's me traveling to their place so we can chat while we walk the baby, or wait while they put the kids to bed and then we can game. If I turn them down they act put out, like I'm being flakey.
The other da... | NAH
You are absolutely allowed to your feelings. It's understandable that you are annoyed with the relationship being more one sided during a time when they have young kids
They are absolutely allowed to put the needs of their kids first. Kids are freaking hard and when they are young trying to do anything around t... |
(Throwaway account, obviously)
So my brother (36) and I (18F) have always been close. We're only half siblings but he adopted me and took me in when our father died several years ago, so he's been more like a parent to me than an older brother. Recently, within the past year he's gotten engaged and I couldn't be happi... | NAH
Would you consider this for just a moment... first let me say I appreciate your anger over this, I appreciate your hurt also. I’m going to ask that you put it aside for one minute and consider this.
Imagine knowing you had a sibling who had issues that would lower their life expectancy. Could you imagine that th... |
Preface: This happened a couple of months ago, but I only recently told my fiancé, who acted like I was...a monster.
I had a real shit day. A lot of stressful clients, some family drama. Overall, just a lot for me to deal with. I really wanted an ice coffee and my favorite muffin from my favorite cafe.
I go inside an... | NAH
The mom asked, you said no. The kid is 6/7 years old and needs to learn sometimes other people want the same things as you, and they got there first. You weren’t rude about it and neither was the mom, the kid needs to learn eventually. ###### |
Note: My wife was a track athlete during high school. I guess this made her think that she was much faster than me.
We were playing a game when the topic of races came up. She mentioned that she was a track athlete in high school and a softball player. She told me that she could crush me in a 100 meter dash.
I disa... | NAH
She's sad, not angry, or taking it out on you or anything (at least according to the post), so she's not really TA.
You aren't TA for trying to win in a race. ###### |
I'm a trust fund child. My father is extremely well off and a complete narcissist.
My mother died when I was young. I was raised by my maternal grandparents as my father wanted nothing to do with me. He would show up for a week or two at a time, set me up with money and told me constantly how he wished I hadn't been b... | NAH
She needs to realise you really aren't family outside of blood. Your childhood was vastly different to hers and you don't have to let her into your life if you don't want to.
She is however allowed to feel hurt by your choice. To her, you are family and that means something to her.
She didn't get to choose the ... |
Title probably sounds bad without context but here it goes.
Also this is a throwaway because people know my main account
​
Me (27 M) and my Fiancee (29 F) have been together for about 4 years now.
Back when we first met, she told me that she was engaged to someone else only a year prior, but he unfortuna... | NAH
Maybe you could suggest to make a nice photo album of them together or pictures of him, and she can keep it somewhere so she could look if she wanted. I would also be uncomfortable in your situation, hope you guys find a solution ###### |
Excuse my English, it is not my first language.
1 year ago my sister became vegan overnight after watching a documentary called Dominion, she quickly started making changes to our home, from making our parents change salad dressings, to have her own pans and a lot of stuff that personally bothered me.
What I did nex... | NAH
LMFAO to the "for every animal you don't eat I am going to eat three, so you being vegan is a net negative for animal welfare." When you changed your diet YTA for doing it out of spite--it's such a sister thing to do which I find funny because I have sisters.
But the fact that you like your diet you are NTA. You... |
Girlfriend is upset with me because I (photoshop artist) won’t photoshop “imperfections” out of her images. (Make her skinnier, remove acne, etc)
I think she is beautiful the way it is and photoshopping these images is wrong and most likely not good for her mental health. ###### | NAH
Just tell her that. Tell her she's beautiful. ###### |
When I was growing up and I took a long bath, my dad would always check to make sure I hadn't fallen asleep. This made me realize the importance of not falling asleep in the bath as you could drown.
I was alone in the house with my daughter [16F] for the day. She was in the bath for an unusually long time (4 hours) a... | NAH
Its an awkward dad moment. I would be mortified of my dad did that to me when I was a teen, so I can see why she's upset. But I dont blame you for being concerned, reading your post i was thinking drowning
I would just apologize but talk to her about why she is taking long baths. Eventually the awkwardness will... |
I (M18) work at a fast food restaurant (this was about 6 weeks ago btw, but has been playing in my mind every night). The store wasn’t very busy with only a few customers seated eating their food. A young and attractive girl walked up to register to order her food, and my coworker began taking her order whilst I was le... | NAH
It’s better to step in and have things turn out okay than to do nothing and risk it being more serious.
You did the right thing and even apologised when you made a mistake. You’re definitely not an asshole here. ###### |
My best friend got engaged about a year and a half ago. From when she got engaged she told me I was going to be her maid of honor, however now that the actual planning is going to start, she tells me that I’m not going to be her maid of honor, but a bridesmaid instead. She said I don’t have enough wedding planning expe... | NAH
It's understandable that you're a bit upset.
But... be really happy that you aren't on the hook for the MOH responsibilities. ###### |
Since I'm stuck at home I've been doing some cleaning and getting rid of a lot of stuff. Today I went through my jewelry. I'm a jewelry freak and constantly buy myself dumb trinkets but also have a few really nice pieces. I'm 25 so I was trying to clear out everything I don't/wouldn't wear to work and basically narrow ... | NAH
It's not ghoulish or wrong to want to keep the ashes. But since you have a history with your boyfriend not wanting you to hold on to jewelry from ex's I think you should tell him the true story. Now he's just going to wonder why you're being so vague and that's not fair to him. ###### |
A friend of mine started dating this girl (we are both graduated college now). He told me how he was dating this girl for four months now. I told him that I knew of her he asked how, I told him on how she was used to always show up to my best friend's frat parties and that she slept with a lot of the guys there.
&... | NAH
It sounds like you had a normal conversation with a friend, and you knew this information would be valuable to him. I'm sure you knew it would cause problems too, but you made sure to let him know it might not even be true, and that he should confirm it with her.
She's not an asshole either. She's only four mont... |
We’re currently in the process of getting a new house. There are four younger children, myself and my older sister and my two parents. 8 people total.
We can only afford a 5 bedroom home. Mum and stepdad have theirs, my younger brother to himself and my older sister to himself.
I’ve just been told that I’m expecting... | NAH
It is absolutely fair that you don't want to share with a younger sister - 7 years is a huge difference at that age, which definitely makes sharing a room less than ideal.
At the same time, circumstances here means there is no ideal solution while you are all at home together and some of you have to accept the s... |
My friend is 5'4 and 230 pounds and lives with a family of enablers. Her family is also all overweight and like to focus on building her up, which is super great, but they do that by just lying to her. They told her there's nothing wrong with the shape she is in, and that being thick is a good thing and guys love it.
... | NAH
It all depends on the way you tell her. But by telling her you can potentially really help her develop a healthy diet, workout routine, and change her life around. Obesity isn’t something to be proud of and I hate that the body positivity movement has warped into a movement of enabling bad eating habits and hatre... |
I feel like I'm probably the asshole but here we go.
So last night my fiance and me went over to his friends house who we'll call D his friend has this girlfriend who we'll call T. Now T is like everything I've ever wanted to be. Fully tattooed from neck down, a professional Instagram model, she's hung out with count... | NAH
If you were a recovering alcoholic, no one would fault you for not wanting to hang out with someone casually drinking.
You need to make the choice that keeps you healthy.
EDIT: I should add, if this is that much a trigger for you, you should probably seek therapy (if not currently doing so). ###### |
I [18M] was playing a game of truth or dare with a small group of friends. One of my friends Annie [18F] is a lesbian but I have a secret crush on her. We are close. I kept my feelings and attraction towards her a secret as I know I obviously have no chance with her. She was playing this game of T or D with us.
One o... | NAH
If you make the decision to play Truth or Dare, you have to accept that at some point a truth might come out that you don't necessarily want to hear. That's just the mechanics of the game, and if you're not prepared to handle that you shouldn't play it. Your friend was unjustified in taking this up with you after... |
My boyfriend and I have been together for a year. We are quite serious- saving for a house, talking about timelines for an engagement, etc.
Since I have known him he has always been a smoker. He smokes about a pack a day, everyday. It averages to $460 a month in cigarettes. I smoke pot regularly (a few times a week) ... | NAH
If it's a deal breaker for you now, break up. Better now than later. ###### |
Sorry for any bad formatting, I'm on mobile, And I'm so pissed off right now.
My (M43) stepdaughter (F13) has been living with us for eight years now and she lacks a massive mount of respect for me and for everybody else.
She's so aggressive and loud and does not like being told to do anything. Especially by me.
Alw... | NAH
I’d look into some therapy. She’s obviously not dealing well with her parents‘ divorce.
At least have your wife and her ex-husband sit down with her and make her understand that their marriage wasn’t working anymore and WHY.
Idk if it’s the case but most times in divorces I find that parents just don’t explai... |
Ok so I have a step child that my SO and I see every other weekend. Every year on Mother's Day my MIL sends flowers or a card and signs the step child's name to the gift.
Now, MIL is a VERY kind and well intentioned person and I honestly do appreciate the gifts. My issue is that stepchild has made it clear that they... | NAH
I’d also emphasize that you enjoy the gifts from her, and understand that it’s in appreciation for your role in that child’s life. For the sake of the kid, you want to make sure you keep the roles clear to respect his feelings though. ###### |
So about 5 weeks ago, this girl and I matched on tinder, and we both really liked each other! From then on, we have been chatting, pretty much nonstop, throughout lockdown over Instagram.
Yesterday, she told me we were too different and she wouldn't be able to date me (crushing). She did say, however, that she reall... | NAH
I'll never understand why or how people settle for friendship when they obviously want more.
Just tell her being friends isn't working for you right now.
Perhaps you can be friends down the line when your romantic feelings have subsided. ###### |
We are vacationing at the beach. My father in law is obsessed with getting sticky buns from the local bakery every time we are here. The last few days he has taken my son with him to try to get the delicious treats but comes back empty handed because the lines were always really really long.
Today he decides to go rea... | NAH
I think your father in law just desperately wants to share one of his favourite things with your son.
You only want to look out after your son and make sure he gets enough sleep.
Talk with your father in law, if he managed to get those buns this time. Maybe arrange that the next evening you put your son a bit ... |
My husbands grandpa passed away about 9 months ago. He was 97 years old and aside from typical aging, he had a fairly healthy and happy life. My husband was extremely sad when he passed away. He has never had a relative pass away in his life, so this is really his first time grieving and going through this process.
I... | NAH
I think you have to have a bit more empathy for your husband. This is still fairly fresh for him, and it is the first death he is dealing with.
Grief is not a competition. I don't feel that you are wrong exactly, but he is not saying anything trying to hurt you, nor do I believe he is trying to trivialize your g... |
My dad was INSISTENT on me (22M) filling out the $1200 check application, so I did. On the form, the only tax information it asked ME about was my 2018 taxes. When I got my results back, it said I got denied because "someone else" claimed me as a dependent, which I was NOT in 2018. My dad, who makes almost $100k a year... | NAH
I think this is an uncomfortable situation, but I don't see anyone I would call an asshole.
It still works out for you, it seems, from your own perspective.
What I would do is say "Dad, yes this worked out, but I know what you did, you know what you did, I will not allow it to happen again. Thank you for your h... |
I live in an apartment complex. There is a long sidewalk that leads to my apartment, and my Hindu next door neighbor’s apartment.
Every couple of days there are swastikas drawn on the sidewalk leading to their apartment.
I politely asked my neighbor is she and her husband could put the symbol in front of their door... | NAH
I get why you'd be offended (even though these swastikas or sauvastikas aren't drawn with ill intent) but I also understand that your neighbors are doing this out of their religious practice and not as a slight to anyone. It would be nice if they didn't do this in the common area though so I side more with you. #... |
So my high school announced today how we are doing graduation this year with the virus, and the solution sucks. The solution is that over the course of a week all the graduating students will walk across the gym, grab their diploma from a table, and take a photo in their cap & gown. Each student will be the only on... | NAH
I don’t blame you for not wanting to participate. The “once in a lifetime” experience of the graduation ceremony has already been taken from you because of the pandemic. If it makes other people happy, that’s awesome, but it sounds like you don’t care.
I didn’t attend my college graduation. There was no real rea... |
I am involved in a non-monogamous relationship with a couple. I am their unicorn. I have met up with them twice but its easier for me to meet him separately so he came to my house a few weeks ago.
Anyway I try to be friends with the wife outside of sex. I got insanely sick Tuesday night and spent all of Wesnesday and ... | NAH
I don't think you did anything malicious here, and to you it was mostly a "duh, silly me" thing. But relationships - especially non-monogamous ones - do depend on trust and honesty.
If the assumption was that you're on birth control, and she found out you didn't take it for 4 days - yeah, I can see she's upset. ... |
Context: We share all our chores and cooking and cleaning except laundry, which I’ve offered to do, but my wife says she loves doing the laundry because it’s cathartic for her. We have planned time to take our daughter for alone time and planned dates. And plan out what things we’ll do each week. She currently is a sta... | NAH
I can tell you from experience, most times when my wife is stressed or frustrated with something I have learned not to try to solve the "apparent" problem and to just ask if she wants to talk/vent/rant etc and then just listen, validate her feelings, and THEN ask if I can help in some way.
If this method doesn't... |
The background: when I (21f) was 7, I had a piggy bank where all my chore/birthday/Christmas money went. I had been adding to it for over a year and it had more than $100 in it. One morning, I woke up to find my bank was broken into and my money was gone. I immediately suspected my dad. At the time, he had lost his job... | NAH
Having an addict for a parent is rough, dude. To this day I can’t take a pill without shaking it first, because my mom would steal the adderal out of my pills and leave me empty capsules. That inherent trust of a parent wasn’t broken by your mother, it was broken by your father through addiction and neglect. You ... |
So I (F18) have pretty severe arachnophobia. I’ve never been officially diagnosed, but seeing spiders can send me into what I call “cringe attacks” where I kinda spasm uncontrollably for a few minutes while physically cringing, and there have been a few cases where seeing too many spiders in one place or too close has ... | NAH
Girl, I'm a decade older than you and I still deal with this. The spasms! I'm very outdoorsy and get made fun of by my friends quite often, but there's just no helping it. I'm not even sure therapy would help. Defaulting to "Go get therapy" seems to be a tendency of this sub, and while it may work with some probl... |
So my boyfriend and I are planning on moving in the next few months but we currently are in a weird financial problem. Basically his parents are both not working and we're not sure if they need to borrow money. I have money saved up in my own savings to pay for a couch from IKEA thats on sale currently but he wants to ... | NAH
Generally I’d say doing something behind someone’s back is not okay but IF buying it changes nothing about your current situation and will eventually mean saving some money, then do it.
I understand his thought process and why he’s worried but it also sounds like you haven’t talked to him about what your plan is... |
Recently i (16F) lost a very close friend of mine. she had an eating disorder (anorexia) and passed due to it. Now, due to everything that is happening im not sure of details about her funeral, but i was discussing this with another friend of mine, A (17M.) we were talking about the funeral and whether there would be o... | NAH
Everyone deals with grief and death differently. what seems appropriate to you might feel awkward to him and vice versa. Although I can see the joke being sort of tasteless, it's not like anyone's actually going to play that at her funeral. The likelihood of any of you (friends) getting to be involved in the plan... |
I'm M27 and my gf is f23 and we've been together for 2 years about. When we first starting seriously dating 2 yrs ago she was a student and still is. She never really asked me how much I made and she assumed that I don't make a lot because she didn't even know my job existed before we were together and I live with my p... | NAH
But you really probably should have explained the potential. She’s already with you not knowing how much you made, she’s not here for the money. That much should be clear. ###### |
Throwaway, because said person browses reddit.
So recently my sister released her first album, and it is AMAZING. Like, I think there is a very high chance that she will make it in her genre of music. She wanted to see my reaction before she released it, and awkwardly watched me as I heard it for the first time. Howe... | NAH
but you could just tell her that the song she wrote about depression resonated a lot with you and bring up the topic this way. If she makes gains fans as an artist she'll get a lot of people telling her what her songs meant to them and how they made them feel. ###### |
My GF has been protesting frequently. I have gone with her a few times but I think it's time to stop. I want to enjoy my summer. There's other stuff I wanna do.
She asked me if I wanted to protest for pride today (were not even gay) but she has a friend who is. I said no, and this is like my third time in a row sayin... | NAH
But I hope you're prepared to be single. She clearly has different priorities than you and I suspect she's likely willing to put them over you. ###### |
Title makes me sound like an undebatable ass but here we go.
Myself (18f) and my friend (18f) are gay and both of our families are on the conservative side. I'm out to my family, she's not. She's in a pretty committed relationship with a mutual friend of ours and wants to come out to her family, so she asked for any ad... | NAH
A lot of what you are saying implies there is something wrong, you are probably doing this accidentally. I think you accidentally used your families homophobia to let them fill in the gaps, being gay is wrong but you can't fix it like any other genetic or developmental medical condition.
Biologically as well, t... |
Throwaway, because said person browses reddit.
So recently my sister released her first album, and it is AMAZING. Like, I think there is a very high chance that she will make it in her genre of music. She wanted to see my reaction before she released it, and awkwardly watched me as I heard it for the first time. Howe... | NAH
"Hey sis, I listened to your album and I loved it, what a fantastic accomplishment! I'm so proud of you. 'X Song' spoke to me especially, it made me think of my struggles recently and how much I want the people close to me to know I appreciate them and their helping me. It takes a lot of talent to be able to make... |
I'll try to keep it short:
My husband (28M) and I (26F) have been trying to get pregnant for about a year. About a week before Father's day, I took a pregnancy test, because I started having symptoms. It tested positive. But just to be sure, I also went to see a professional that also confirmed it. By now, it was abou... | NAH.
You guys have been trying for a year which isn't very long for some people and a long time for others. He is probably disappointed because he wanted to share in the initial excitement of finding out you were pregnant. I know a friend of mine was outside the door when his wife took the test and shared the moment i... |
my partner when they were younger had issues with some older men saying they hoped they shaved their genitals. My partner mentioned something today about how bare female genitals make them uncomfy and said anyone who wants to be with someone who shaves is a creep. I asked what purpose pubic hair served, cause I honestl... | NAH.
Seems like your (ex) partner experienced something pretty traumatic which they’re now projecting on things that aren’t necessarily related.
I think they should get professional help.
Sorry that it didn’t work out, hope you’re doing okay ###### |
So my wife and I have a scale in our bedroom. My wife is a little overweight, but nothing gross looking, just a little bit. I don’t know that she would even qualify as overweight by BMI, but I also don’t know her exact weight.
Last night she was weighing her self while I was petting the cat in bed, and as she stepped... | NAH.
It’s funny but she was probably a little hurt when it broke. I had a lecture class and my chair broke one time I definitely felt fat even though I was about 118lb/54 kg. The chair would’ve broke no matter who sat on it but it was embarrassing that it was me. ###### |
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