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https://www.theonion.com/express-lane-cashier-confirms-her-nails-are-real-1819564958
express-lane cashier confirms her nails are real
1
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/simplewater-remove-arsenic_us_56aba78de4b00b033aaee7a1
how a firm helps small communities remove contamination from their water
0
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/matthew-flores-books-utah-mailman_us_56001729e4b08820d9195007
boy who asked mailman for junk mail in viral story pays kindness forward
0
https://www.theonion.com/gay-guys-gay-thing-well-attended-1819569756
gay guy's gay thing well attended
1
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/chester-bennington-seen-laughing-before-death_us_59bed2e7e4b02da0e142d99d
chester bennington's wife shares video of him laughing hours before his death
0
https://www.huffingtonpost.comhttp://www.thedenverchannel.com/news/local-news/surgical-tech-in-needle-swap-scandal-at-swedish-medical-center-has-hiv-officials-confirm
surgical tech in needle-swap scandal at swedish medical center has hiv
0
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/chris-farley-mission-impossible_us_55ba4386e4b095423d0e07e1
guys, someone edited chris farley into the 'mission: impossible' trailer
0
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/judith-miller-clings-to-h_b_7018280.html
judith miller clings to her own stubborn myths
0
https://politics.theonion.com/hillary-clinton-issues-single-word-victory-speech-follo-1819578663
hillary clinton issues single-word victory speech following super tuesday results
1
https://politics.theonion.com/ted-cruz-asks-central-park-hansom-cab-driver-how-much-i-1819578808
ted cruz asks central park hansom cab driver how much it costs to whip horse for an hour
1
https://www.theonion.com/latest-bin-laden-tape-for-completists-only-1819568311
latest bin laden tape for completists only
1
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/john-mccain-barack-obama-guantanamo-bay_us_56cde34be4b0928f5a6df9b3
obama loses key potential republican ally on guantanamo bay closure
0
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/ban-ki-moon-syria-refugees-pledges_us_56fbd0bae4b0a06d58041533
un chief urges countries to resettle syrian refugees, but pledges are few
0
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/healing-vigilante-the-number-one-way-to-not-forget-your-child-in-the-car_b_5535014.html
number one way to not forget your child in the car? be more present
0
https://www.theonion.com/islamic-fundamentalists-condemn-casual-day-1819586388
islamic fundamentalists condemn casual day
1
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/female-ceos_us_57179bdde4b0018f9cbbc80c
it's not getting any easier for women to become ceos
0
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/robin-williams-contributi_b_5673224.html
cinema therapy and robin williams
0
https://www.theonion.com/dept-of-homeland-security-introduces-dhs-for-men-1819588604
dept. of homeland security introduces dhs for men
1
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/i-dont-fight-because-im-violenti-fight-because-the_us_57d893e4e4b047401d0468ab
i don't fight because i'm violent -- i fight because the world is
0
https://politics.theonion.com/i-think-we-still-have-a-shot-carly-fiorina-assures-c-1819578571
'i think we still have a shot,' carly fiorina assures closest inkjet printer
1
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/taraji-p-henson-reacts-to-first-familys-thoughts-on-empire_us_56200444e4b0c5a1ce62a62d
taraji p. henson reacts to first family's thoughts on 'empire'
0
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/sinead-oconnor-overdose-note-facebook_us_565b5ed3e4b072e9d1c22fb0
sinead o'connor is 'safe and sound' after emotional facebook post about overdose
0
https://entertainment.theonion.com/judge-awards-heather-mills-writing-credit-on-eleanor-ri-1819569739
judge awards heather mills writing credit on 'eleanor rigby'
1
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/amy-schumer-gq-party_us_56619c79e4b08e945fef03b4
amy schumer stuns in a white minidress at gq men of the year party
0
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/people-are-trying-to-listen-to-serial-so-can-you-kindly-stfu_us_566b3a3ce4b0e292150dedb4
people are trying to listen to 'serial,' so can you kindly stfu?
0
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/smuggler-allegedly-brings-weed-stuffed-bible-into-jail_us_55c90f70e4b0f73b20ba5f19
smuggler allegedly brings weed-stuffed bible into jail
0
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/how-much-money-do-you-nee_b_6714658.html
how much money do you need?
0
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/they-finally-did-something-cool-to-spider-mans-suit-after-5-movies_us_58481fcfe4b0d0df183724d1
they finally did something cool to spider-man's suit after all those movies
0
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/micronesia-vanuatu-soccer-or-football-who-knows_us_559c1814e4b0759e2b510c45
actual soccer team loses game 46-0
0
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/jay-clayton-securities-exchange-commission-goldman-sachs-trump_us_59079c58e4b05c3976817a8d
congress is about to confirm another former goldman sachs honcho for trump
0
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/fbi-comey-my-homey-shirts-family-day_us_5956f33de4b05c37bb7e8532
fbi employees wear 'comey is my homey' shirts to family day
0
https://www.theonion.com/good-news-kept-from-parents-out-of-fear-of-proving-them-1819578032
good news kept from parents out of fear of proving them right
1
https://local.theonion.com/man-must-be-living-with-roommates-by-choice-at-this-poi-1819577472
man must be living with roommates by choice at this point
1
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/make-time-for-your-own-we_b_5615383.html
make time for your own wellbeing: ways to rethink exercise so you'll actually do it
0
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/amazons-ma-strategy-evolves_us_59cd2a38e4b08c75a3fa436c
amazon's m&a strategy evolves
0
https://local.theonion.com/family-without-candy-sits-huddled-in-darkened-house-lik-1820021523
family without candy sits huddled in darkened house like londoners during the blitz
1
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/kate-mara-female-superheroes_us_55c27cfbe4b0923c12bb6cf3
kate mara: it's 'quite an honor' to play a female superhero
0
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/haiti-hurricane-matthew-rebuild_us_5806279de4b0180a36e63f26
desperation grips haiti as it struggles to rebuild yet again
0
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/barneys-racial-profiling_n_5669129.html
barneys pays $525,000 to settle allegations of racial profiling
0
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/will-congress-revive-a-dual-school-system_b_5343445.html
60 years after brown v. board, will congress revive a dual school system?
0
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/i-want-you-gentle-reader-_b_5231276.html
i want you, gentle reader, to lighten up!
0
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/trumpet-is-delivering-the-politicized-judiciary-republicans_us_5a5e16fde4b01ccdd48b5f9a
trump is delivering the politicized judiciary republicans dreamed about
0
https://local.theonion.com/explanation-of-board-game-rules-peppered-with-reassuran-1819579569
explanation of board game rules peppered with reassurances that it will be fun
1
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/drake_n_6050354.html
drake throws money and angrily storms into club
0
https://www.theonion.com/japanese-businessman-found-hiding-on-golf-course-thinks-1819589606
japanese businessman found hiding on golf course thinks mid-'80s economic boom still going on
1
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/for-that-parent-whos-not-the-sharpest-crayon-in-the-box-a-poem_b_5789898.html
for that parent who's not the sharpest crayon in the box: a poem
0
https://entertainment.theonion.com/network-news-satellites-collide-over-iraq-1819566794
network news satellites collide over iraq
1
https://www.theonion.com/diet-candys-aftertaste-experienced-12-years-later-1819565606
diet candy's aftertaste experienced 12 years later
1
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/rewriting-nepal-2014-is-m_b_5776448.html
rewriting nepal: 2014 is marked by sparkling english-language debuts
0
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/axe-rebranding_us_56993fe6e4b0ce496424590c
axe wants to shed its douchey reputation and empower men
0
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/this-marvelous-mess_b_6670084.html
this marvelous mess
0
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/fate-of-cargo-ship-unknown-as-hurricane-joaquin-batters-bahamas_us_560ff0d5e4b0dd85030c4438
fate of cargo ship unknown as hurricane joaquin batters bahamas
0
https://www.theonion.com/drug-sniffing-dog-develops-taste-for-bit-o-honeys-1819587403
drug-sniffing dog develops taste for bit-o-honeys
1
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/trump-campaign-flails-trying-to-defend-his-rigged-election-talk_us_5808cd1de4b0180a36e9a14d
donald trump's campaign flails trying to defend his 'rigged election' talk
0
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/game-of-thrones-watermelon-carving_us_576aa83ee4b09926ce5d38cf
watch this artist carve a watermelon into the night king from 'game of thrones'
0
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/abandoned-french-chateau_n_5208202.html
a stunning look inside an abandoned french chateau
0
https://www.theonion.com/coworkers-pull-off-daring-one-hour-lunch-break-1819577936
coworkers pull off daring one-hour lunch break
1
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/tim-duncan-hurricane-irma-virgin-islands_us_59b50d11e4b0dfaafcf8633a
after irma, tim duncan pens emotional plea: 'don't forget' the u.s. virgin islands
0
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/huffpollster-is-sanders-really-leading-in-new-hampshire_us_55cdd91be4b0ab468d9cf0bf
huffpollster: is bernie sanders really leading in new hampshire?
0
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/big-bend-skyscraper-new-york_us_58d92850e4b02a2eaab60dee
the big bend, a u-shaped skyscraper, could become the longest in the world
0
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/otto-warmbier-prison-treatment_us_5942969be4b0d318548792b1
otto warmbier, u.s. student freed from north korea, has 'severe' neurological injury
0
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/illinois-quarantine-ebola-patients_n_6046976.html
illinois orders mandatory ebola quarantine for high-risk travelers
0
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/mahmoud-ahmadinejad-iran-election_us_58ede52fe4b0df7e2046849f
ex-iranian president mahmoud ahmadinejad plans to run again
0
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/ben-affleck-happily-reviewing-batman-v-superman-means-sad-affleck-is-officially-dead_us_57f510a3e4b015995f2c4c79
ben affleck happily reviewing 'batman v superman' means sad affleck is officially dead
0
https://www.theonion.com/scientist-has-nagging-feeling-he-left-particle-accelera-1819567314
scientist has nagging feeling he left particle accelerator on
1
https://www.theonion.com/apples-gag-division-unveils-sleekest-fake-dog-shit-to-d-1819574093
apple's gag division unveils sleekest fake dog shit to date
1
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/pope-beauty-vloggers_us_574dd7c1e4b0af73af958b9a
turns out pope francis is a fan of beauty vloggers
0
https://local.theonion.com/shamefaced-man-stands-stock-still-as-acquaintance-zips-1819578462
shamefaced man stands stock-still as acquaintance zips up backpack for him
1
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/hillary-clinton-next-president_us_57f27efee4b0c2407cdee244
hillary clinton is likely to be the next president of the united states
0
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/abortion-lisa-murkowski-susan-collins-trump-judges_us_5ade226ae4b0b2e8113244df
pro-choice gop senators keep voting for trump's anti-abortion judges
0
https://www.theonion.com/religious-pamphlet-sat-on-1819587244
religious pamphlet sat on
1
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/jeb-bush-supporters-second-choice_us_56c9209be4b041136f174a8b
bush dropped out. here's where his voters might go.
0
https://www.theonion.com/therapist-feels-bad-for-dating-patients-daughter-1819574548
therapist feels bad for dating patient's daughter
1
https://politics.theonion.com/nation-unable-to-recall-if-trump-said-he-d-personally-f-1819578935
nation unable to recall if trump said he'd personally fund abortion bombings or if that just sounds right
1
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/michael-avenatti-michael-cohen_us_5af50185e4b032b10bf90a16
michael avenatti warns michael cohen: i still have more documents to release
0
https://www.theonion.com/gynecologists-recommend-taking-time-off-between-iuds-to-1825012559
gynecologists recommend taking time off between iuds to allow body to expel backlogged periods
1
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/heres-why-some-black-women-arent-here-for-womenboycotttwitter_us_59e0e6a6e4b04d1d518167ce
here's why some black women aren't here for #womenboycotttwitter
0
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/marching-for-equality-and-justice-in-january_us_5851e4cae4b0bae8bdcba2a4
marching for equality and justice in january
0
https://local.theonion.com/man-worried-antidepressants-will-leave-trace-of-origina-1819576990
man worried antidepressants will leave trace of original personality
1
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/greece-likely-to-miss-may_n_7450362.html
uh-oh: greece is probably going to miss its deal deadline
0
https://entertainment.theonion.com/roommate-wont-shut-up-about-his-best-sound-mixing-oscar-1819569706
roommate won't shut up about his best sound mixing oscar
1
https://www.theonion.com/mother-comes-pretty-close-to-using-word-streaming-cor-1819575546
mother comes pretty close to using word 'streaming' correctly
1
https://www.huffingtonpost.comhttp://www.popsugar.com/celebrity/Selena-Gomez-Wearing-Polka-Dot-Bikini-Mexico-Pictures-37312458#photo-37312458
selena gomez hits the beach in a bikini
0
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/warning-1988-home-video-of-a-kid-getting-nintendo-is-intensely-nostalgic_us_5a1c68b2e4b0e9bc3368d247
warning: this 1988 home video of a kid getting a nintendo is intensely nostalgic
0
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/apple-watch-success-or-fa_b_8060310.html
apple watch: success or failure?
0
https://www.theonion.com/pope-francis-worried-about-job-security-after-butting-h-1819578788
pope francis worried about job security after butting heads with new god
1
https://www.theonion.com/police-assure-residents-kidnapping-was-only-one-of-thos-1819577816
police assure residents kidnapping was only one of those custody-related ones
1
https://www.theonion.com/manager-fails-to-keep-it-short-or-sweet-1819566157
manager fails to keep it short or sweet
1
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/snow-angel-marthas-vineyard_b_6743986.html
snow angel
0
https://www.theonion.com/researchers-find-human-beings-naturally-evolved-toward-1819576261
researchers find human beings naturally evolved toward monogamy and carrying on fun little flings on side
1
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/hair-salon-quiet-chair_us_565f0857e4b08e945fed80d2
hair salon's 'quiet chair' is a dream for haters of smalltalk
0
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/esports-governing-body-world-esports-association_us_5734fcfbe4b08f96c182b7b0
e-sports organizations are going to launch governing body for pro video gaming
0
https://www.theonion.com/philadelphia-museum-of-art-erects-statue-of-overweight-1819592135
philadelphia museum of art erects statue of overweight tourist posing next to rocky statue
1
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/holiday-gift-guide-older-people_b_8787888.html
9 fabulous gift ideas for older loved ones
0
https://www.theonion.com/bernie-sanders-fills-in-for-factory-worker-unable-to-ta-1819592698
bernie sanders fills in for factory worker unable to take time off to vote
1
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/learn-to-fix-the-1-mistak_b_5241320.html
learn to fix the no. 1 mistake you are making in yoga practice
0
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/for-the-first-time-chimpa_n_5544061.html
for the first time, chimpanzees are making a fashion statement
0
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/michigan-medicaid_us_5af49fa3e4b032b10bf8c60c
there's no good excuse for the racist impact of michigan's medicaid proposal
0
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/sasha-malia-obama-lionel-messi-failed-meeting_us_56f448e1e4b014d3fe22a2be
sasha and malia obama tried (and failed) to meet soccer superstar in argentina
0
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/lena-headey-cersei-bachelor-insults_us_56a7a563e4b0b87beec60dd0
queen cersei reading insults from 'the bachelor' is what tv dreams are made of
0