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Basically just want to post to remind everyone how strong we are.
OCD can grip your life it’s always there especially when you feel alone ( or is for me)
I suffered alone for 5 years struggling with all sorts of intrusive thoughts such as images in the head, sexual perverse things etc etc.
It’s shaped my life and how I’ve acted and decision I’ve made. Its ruined the best relationship I’ve ever had which I’m still fighting to get better for.(even thought even now ocd still asks me are your actually wanting this person still)
we all know OCD sucks. But what I really want to get across In this post is even when you feel so isolated and alone, I promise you aren’t.
I reached out on 06/01/2021 after 5 years of silence and it’s genuinely the best thing I’ve ever done (shock).
Explaining your ocd isn’t as hard as it sounds I used simple language and didn’t fully explain everthing I wasn’t comfortable with. If you’ve been contemplating telling I can tell you only good can come of it! Speak to a friend before a parent if your not comfortable and ask your friend to sit with you while you do it.
Everyone’s OCD journey is different and hard no matter what. I really want to just give out some love and positive energy and just remind you of how strong you are and we will beat this! :) ❤️
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OCD
|
I am exhausted. I can't remember the time where I've had uninterrupted sleep besides the times I've passed out from drinking. Constantly trying to push my thoughts back so I can do basic things like clean up around my house and go to work, which are now huge struggles for me. Sometimes, lately, I've been having mini-flashbacks at work. People know something is wrong with me. I want it to all stop. I want it to all end. The only time I get any sort of relief is when I am drunk. But I am a very different person when I drink. But I don't want to exist sober because of it. I just want to stop. Existing. I don't know what to do. Nothing will make me better. I think this is the thing that's gonna do me in.
​
edit: Someone close to me did say "Oh sorry, I didn't realize Vietnam was so traumatizing" which sent me into a fit of tears on the floor. No one cares lol
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ptsd
|
That’s the PTSD talking tonight. I made the mistake of looking back at something I really wanted but had to give up because of my body’s response to stress. It’s not fair. I tried. I fucking made plans and waited a month and prepared my life and my body still betrayed me. Why do I torture myself by looking back and missing it, when my body said enough “nope you fucking broken piece of shit you aren’t allowed to be happy” already?
I’m not making sense. But my brain doesn’t seem to want to do that anymore.
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ptsd
|
I feel like I don’t even have pocd anymore. I’m constantly thinking about children in sexual situations and my groinal responses feel like they are actual arousal. My thoughts don’t cause nearly that much anxiety as they used to and I’m starting to feel like I enjoy them. I don’t want to be a pedophile and would probably kill myself if I was...but everything feels too real. Can pocd do all of this, or am I still denying the truth?
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OCD
|
I think about this person all the time to the extent it is interfering with my life.
Have any of you ever had this problem before? This isn’t something I see discussed often.
I realize how weird it is because it’s another individual, but I can’t shake the thoughts.
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OCD
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My medication makes me subconsciously grind my teeth, anyone got any tips or advice I’m scared of damaging them
I started being medicated recently I got diagnosed when I was five and my parents decided not to medicate me I made the choice to start because I felt it would benefit me which it defo has but I’m finding it difficult to balance the side affects mainly the appetite suppression and the teeth thing
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ADHD
|
Hello everyone. I figured this might be the best place to seek help from since most of us are on the same boat with this level of sensitivity.
Due to how much I can hear, the threshold of being driven crazy is quite narrow. It has always been this way and it has increased to the point where I had to stop singing in high octaves, remove near 100 songs from my library, avoid getting close to barking dogs and so on.
What happens when this threshold is crossed is one of the most painful experiences I've ever felt in my life. It ruptures my ears, air flows through the ears in a weird way and there is a glitch sound playing, like it is from a horrow movie. I would link a sound that's similar but it might have been triggering to some of us.
Don't know if it is caused by this level of sensitivy throughout the years, but I also have tinnitus. Think it is there for at least 4 years by now and I know that ear damage is permanent, which is tragic.
​
I don't enjoy hearing a ticking object from 200 meters away while normal people hear it when they get 30 meters within it. It is not fun to hear the snorings of someone that lives 2 stories above me. Not being able to attend to live music is awful. Hearing every detail in someone's mouth while they eat is disgusting and it almost drives me crazy to the point where I wish them dead.
Anyone knows how to cope with this? I would really appreciate it :)
​
​
Note: Here are my vocals if interested, of which I have to do on lower octaves. Apologies for low quality recording: [https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dhCUqJAF\_ys](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dhCUqJAF_ys)
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aspergers
|
I’m extremely sad. I feel like I wear a mask, a facade to please others around me but really I’m fucked up. I’d kill my self if it didn’t completely destroy my parents, but I don’t want to be selfish . I Isolated myself the beginning of pandemic and lost the few friends I had because they were sick of my shit. I’m African American female, and I was raised that you never tell people/ express your problems because no one really cares, so I’ve always internalized my trauma and emotions and dealt with everything silently. It’s getting heavier and harder to hold on. I cope with weed and cigs as of lately to get through the night as that is when my mind starts wondering and self doubt and darkness tries to seep in. I’ve gained tremendous weight since pandemic, I was already overweight before. I just feel alone. I went to a work Holiday party and sat at a table alone for 20 mins. Watching everyone be happy and enjoy the festivities. I felt uncomfortable like I didn’t fit in or see familiar faces because I work from home and not in office. Not writing this for pity or gratification . I’m lost and my only two options are to wait and see how 2022 is or give all my shit way or take some sleeping medication to ease into a peaceful slumber
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depression
|
It's tough at times having aspergers/autism. I have autism myself, and was constantly stuck in the same loop of social anxiety and anger and frustration that I'm sure many of you also know. It wasn't until a year ago that I was able to start to break out of this cycle, to have hope again. If you feel like you've hit rock bottom like I had, please pm me, I'd be glad to help you out!
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aspergers
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Does anyone have days or a week of no intrusive thoughts or anxiety. Does OCD really go through a cycle of really high anxiety qnd depression to living with anxiety and thoughts to no days without it?
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OCD
|
Last month, I started taking Instant Release Adderall (10mg | Twice a day). My fiance also started taking the same amount on the same day.
It has helped us both a lot, but certainly more for her than me.
With Adderall, my fiance goes from being grouchy and annoyed to being lit up like a Christmas Tree, full of energy joy and delight.
As for me, I didn't see much change. I went from not being able to bring myself to do almost anything to being able to do things (with a ton of willpower).
On two days last month, I did experiments.
I did 15mg in the morning and 5mg in the afternoon.
The next, I did 20mg in the morning and nothing in the afternoon.
On both days, I did not feel any more potency. I only felt that it lasted a tad longer.
A couple of days ago was my first follow-up. I told my doctor that I felt like Adderall wasn't super effective, especially when comparing to the dramatic and positive change my fiance has had.
My doctor replied asking me to choose between 15mg Instant Release (Twice a day) or 15mg Extended Release (Once a day). I was surprised this was what she was suggesting considering the experiments I had done.
So, I agreed to Extended Release figuring perhaps it would effect me differently.
Well, so far it feels like I'm not talking anything at all.
I was dissatisfied with Instant Release, but at least I felt a change. With Extended Release, I feel so agitated, miserable and barely able to function.
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ADHD
|
as soon as i state that i'm getting better, i get worse.
tonight i haven't closed my eyes for a minute.
these days i've had delusional ass thoughts to which i didn't believe, strong derealization and no will to socialize whatsoever.
so i'm thinking about developing schizophrenia and i think i'm "enjoying" my last moments of sharpness.
i am scared as fuck
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OCD
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what’s something a professional like a therapist has said that really clicked with you and helped maybe move out of a depression episode?
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depression
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Started new antidepressants 3 days ago and the side effects have been killing me, I'm really nauseous for several hours after taking them to the point where I have to keep going outside. I have absolutely no appetite, like I'm hungry my stomach feels like its eating itself but I don't want anything to eat. And to top it all of I can't sleep. Since starting them I've had 2 hrs, 4 hrs and currently i am yet to fall asleep tonight
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depression
|
I recently have been trying THC (for around a month) to help with sleep and anxiety due to PTSD nightmares, and at first it helped a bit. But now after I took a gummie the other night I had the worst reaction I've ever had and quite possibly one of the worst PTSD episodes to date. I have disassociative disorder and severe depression as well, but it was like I was disassociating and having PTSD flashbacks all at once. Without sounding too dramatic, it was hell. Pain all over, skin aching, mouth numb, dizziness, pins and needles, freezing cold. For a while I thought it dropped my blood pressure too quickly or something, but then I started hearing things from my past and seeing things as well. Has anyone else had such a severe reaction to THC related to PTSD? I know the smell is a trigger for me, but like I said, I had been taking grape flavoured gummies and also a vape pen for at least a month (not at the same time or on the same day) with alright results, but then this happened... I'm obviously never taking that ever again, it was horrific and also very traumatising. But I was just wondering if it was just me, of if anyone else has ever had something similar happen?
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ptsd
|
I just don't have the mental energy that I had about a year ago. I can do hobbies or learn new things but only for so long in a day before I get tired. For example I try to learn chess or a new language or play video games etc. and after a bit I just get completely spent and then I have to stop and take a mental rest for a few hours before I can get the energy back to do anything mentally taxing again. If I push past that point I kinda feel classic depression symptoms like anehedonia and am just completely mentally spent but if I rest for a while and dont go too far I can recover and feel ok again.
Just a year ago I could play video games all day perfectly fine no issue and since then I am in much better shape I wasn't exercising much at all back then and I am now running 30 minutes multiple times week so it feels like I should have more mental stamina not less(Im 30 now).
I also just kinda don't feel myself and completely avoid the news because its just too depressing but not to the point where I'm unhappy a lot outside of not having enough energy. Does this sound like it could be caused by depression?
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depression
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I just dont wanna be alone with my thoughts anymore I have ocd and I've had intrusive thoughts for three days I want do drugs so bad
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depression
|
Anyone wants to talk about their experinces? Or just talk about anything that you like
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aspergers
|
Me (F 24) and my husband (M 24) we're living together for 2 years after we lived with his parents for almost a year. He is unemployed at the moment and I work. He was diagnosed with ADHD recently and also have depression. I'm on the autistic spectrum.
I'm gonna be honest, I'm struggling living with him, our house is a sensory overload hell. He's very messy and doesn't help with the house and the house is so disgusting everyday, there's things everywhere it's TOO MUCH for my head. When I ask him to do something he gets mad and then gets sad after saying he is useless and doesn't do anything right. I just don't say anything anymore bc I don't want him to feel like this but I can't live like this. Even when I try to clean and organize it doesn't last a day.
He was not like this living with his parents, they were VERY strict (Asian parents u kno), and made him do all the house chores.
I don't know what to do, even if I speak to him softly, calmly and with a smile on my face he always get mad or sad or both. I don't want to argue or fight with him or make him depressed or stressed, I honestly don't know how to deal with this and I don't have anyone to talk about this, bc people will tell me to dump him and I don't want to, I love him so much, I just need to understand him better so we can go through this.
Sorry if I said something wrong english is not my first language.
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ADHD
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I absolutely hate those tiktoks where people say "save this sound and whatever you want will come true!" etc etc. it gives me a lot of anxiety because i think if i don't save it or interact or whatever something bad will happen. ik i sound really sensitive but im just really not good at managing my ocd lol
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OCD
|
First, sorry for my English if I made a mistake. My main language is Spanish. I hope someone will find it helpful. 🥰
I seemed to feel nothing, I was feeling everything ...
⚠️ Warning ⚠️ TW Trigger Warning
In this post I talk about sensitive mental issues that can be strong for people with mental disorders. I make this statement before continuing.
I have wanted to tell my story for a long time, not because I want people to know my life, but because I know, like me, there are people who need help.
I was undecided whether to do it in a video or in writing. Anyone who knows me knows that I love cameras but I also love writing. If I did it in a video maybe more people would see it but I was not going to be able to avoid the urge to cry by telling my story.
So here we go.
Warning: ⚠️ TW Trigger Warning
I was always a very active person since I was little, with a privileged mind and thoughts. Hyperactive and always with a head full of ideas. A leading person known for “getting involved in what an invention existed”. Aside from this, I was a rebellious, authority-defying and impulsive teenager (I still am and will be). My mind was always racing very fast. It did not stop. We found it normal. In spite of all this, in the 90's, the fact of diagnosing mental disorders in adolescents, and adults as well, did not yet exist as such. This is another topic to talk about it at another time.
In short, my life since I can remember it was "different" from others. I felt different. But I didn't care. And so the years went by until in 2015, if I remember correctly, I fell into a spiral that did not seem to end.
I had the best jobs. In my field of Public Communication. My execution was excellent and I was always recognized for inventing “things” that “no one would think of”. But, at the same time, when I did not like something or they put obstacles in my way to do things "the way I wanted", I would end up impulsively quitting. It wasn't until my last job; where I met an extraordinary person who to this day is still my best friend; that I realized, with her help, that something was wrong.
Let's stop to explain something. Let's start with the point that most (or not most, but the trend is much higher) of people with mental disorders may abuse legal and illegal drugs, alcohol, and cigarettes. I can say that I used and do use cigarettes; I drank alcohol socially for a long time; medicinal cannabis since adolescence, when adolescence was still not medicinally legal; and I had the worst vice of all: opioids.
I have CKD, Chronic Kidney Disease, stage two. In the early 2000's I got seriously ill with my kidneys. To make a long story short, after surgeries, tests and everything, I was prescribed Percocet, Tramadol, and Oxycodone. It did not take a week to “love” these medications. Sure, I didn't know about the dangers of opioids at the time. I just thought it was "fine" because the doctor prescribed them for me.
So, after this short explanation, my life started to be an inner hell. I couldn't work without having an energy drink for breakfast. To which I added cigarettes, marijuana, Tramadol, Percocet and coffee. It seemed that everything made sense to me and I could work "better" with these substances in my body. What I did not accept; and I say accepted because everyone who knows me knows that I love Medicine and that I seem to have a degree that I always dreamed of but I did not study and I continue to regret it; it was wrong. I couldn't understand why I had to do that to my body in order for my "mind" to believe that everything was "fine."
I started to get sick. I lost an unbelievably amount of weight. At a point that I didn't look healthy, I looked sick. I didn't eat, I just drank water, coffee, and energy drinks. From just thinking about having to go to work and deal with people, I would start vomiting uncontrollably. I could not understand how a person like me, who always liked the public and who loved "being the center of attention", could now be afraid of social interaction, even more so in a job that he loved.
This story is long, but to sum it up, I had several hospitalizations. All admissions were for the same diagnoses: anorexia nervosa and gastritis nervosa. I kept leaving the hospital without knowing what was wrong with me. I understood less and less why I was throwing up so much. I got to vomit 20 to 30 times a day. Sure, the bile, because I didn't eat. I lost the gagging reflex because my body was used to vomiting. If there was a problem at work, I solved it as usual but I did not feel like myself, I did not feel well and inwardly screamed for help. They began to give me memos for getting sick, to lower my hours, in short, to treat me badly to push me to leave. One day, I got tired. I remember that same day; before running to the bathroom with the phone, a former co-worker told me: “You are to be admired. I couldn't do everything you do.” That comment struck a chord with me. I called my husband, may he rest in peace, and I told him that I had to resign, that I couldn't take it anymore. He told me to do it, that my health came first and that he supported me.
I quit. Part of me was relieved, but another part, my mind, was the same or worse. There was really something going on with me. The racing thoughts did not stop. Concerns for the future did not go away. My mind wouldn't stop thinking for a minute. I always wanted to have everything perfect. I wanted to be the perfect wife and mother. I wanted to be so perfect that I hated myself if I made a "mistake." But sometimes those "mistakes" were made unconsciously.
I started giving more time to my social networks and to my work as a beauty and makeup influencer. Behind the screen everything was beautiful. My social networks were pure positivity and happiness. It was not true. I was always screaming inside. With three children, a husband, pets, self-employment, and much more; my "stress" did not subside. It was getting bigger and bigger.
I started to stop doing the things that I liked. I closed my social networks on impulse and lost money, time and hard work. All the time I felt that on each side I looked there was a huge log that would not allow me to keep up. I "turned around" and "went on." Clearly, it wasn't right.
One day, I decided to tell my doctor of more than 20 years, that, by the way, he is an excellent human being. Sadly he told me that he needed help. He handed me a business card so that I could call a colleague, a psychologist, and attend to me with her. After he called her, I called and made an appointment with her. Meanwhile, my doctor prescribed Clonazepam 2mg for anxiety twice a day.
Clonazepam suited me right from the start. I thought it was what I needed. My first appointment with the psychologist came. The first diagnoses: Generalized Anxiety Disorder and Severe Recurrent Major Depression. The panic attacks weren't getting better. I was just sleepy all day but the anxiety and depression were not improving.
A battery of psychologists and psychiatrists followed my case. Second round of added diagnoses: Obsessive Compulsive Disorder, Panic Disorder, Anorexia Nervosa and ADHD or Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder.
My husband became ill in 2018. I abandoned my psychotherapy treatment and dedicated myself to taking care of him. A year later he died. At first, I "knew how to handle" the situation of being a widow with three children. In the morning my coffee or my energy drink and my opioids. And at night my medications for anxiety. I honestly don't remember very well that dark period where I was in a bottomless pit and unable to get out of there.
At the beginning in my widowhood, the first months were of "trying to be strong for my children." One day that I don't remember, I fell into bed and didn't get up from there. I was not interested in anything. Neither eat, nor bathe, nor go out. The bills were piling up, my children worried not knowing what to do. And I curled up in my bed. At that point, I decided to quit opioids. On my own, by myself. If they were going to give me withdrawal effects I didn't care. They didn't give me, thank God. And it's the only thing that pleased me about that catatonic state I was in. I kept taking my anxiety meds but felt worse and worse.
Warning ⚠️ TW Trigger Warning
There was a day that I grabbed an eyebrow liner, and I cut my arm along the length. I still have the five scars that cover my forearm as a reminder of one of many failed attempts to end my life. Sneaky a bit now by the amount of tattoos on my arms. Crying, I called the PAS line. PAS is a mental health help line in Puerto Rico managed by ASSMCA. When they told me they were going to send an ambulance to hospitalize me, I hid. I didn't want that. I remembered the times when I was taking my mother and all the medications she was taking and I was scared. I continued my treatment without the supervision of a psychiatrist until I was referred to APS. APS is a clinic here in Puerto Rico who specializes in Mental Health and manages a considerable amount of patients.
With APS my real struggle began. They prescribed my first antidepressant. Paxil. I was meant to take it once a day and continue the anxiety medication. I went to the pharmacy and when I looked at the antidepressant I started crying. I read a lot. And I read a lot more about Medicine topics as I already mentioned. I knew about the bad reputation of antidepressants as I also knew about their virtues. Either way, I didn't want to take them. My brother, my aunt, my mom and my grandfather were telling me to take it and give it a chance. The Google searches were unsettling. I was focusing more on the side effects than what could actually help me. I just thought that how could only two types of medications help me with all those mental diagnoses that I had. And it is added to my diagnoses: PTSD or Post Traumatic Syndrome and Grief. Yes, grief is a clinical diagnosis that must be managed by a specialist; my current psychologist is an expert in that area. Needless to say, the unopened jars of antidepressants are still lying around.
In March of this year I moved. I was happy because well, first, I would leave a house in which I only had losses and illness and many tragedies. I wanted a new life and I thought the move would help me. It helped me, but moving is also part of feeding your mental disorders.
Lying in bed day and night, I spent days without eating, looking at the moving boxes without unpacking ... The whole house was ready but my room was not. It was as if my body had been transferred from one house to another and I continued to doze as life passed by.
Warning ⚠️ TW Trigger Warning
The panic attacks did not stop. They were more and worse. I was crying to the emergency room and the doctor who saw me already knew me. They injected me with antipsychotics and benzodiazepines and went home. And this ritual continued until July. On July 19, I remember it like now, I looked at my medicine pot and started crying. I thought I was making no progress at all. I just wanted to die. Now I remember that I got dressed and went on foot, alone, without saying a word, to the emergency room. As I walked, I cried and scratched my arms drawing blood. I saw the cars go by and I just wanted to be passed over. I got to the hospital and the nurse sat me down and tried to calm me down. I only remember telling him: “I want to die. My life is worthless. I am a mental patient and I need help but no one gives it to me. "
You know why? I had to look for help. And that day, the doctor who always helped me saw me and she told me that if I authorized her that she would confine me to a mental hospital. Crying I said yes. And with tears in her eyes she told me that I was going to be all right. And she began to make preparations for the transfer and hospitalization.
I was nervous. I will not tell my experience inside the mental hospital because it would already be a book. I can only summarize that the medications that I took for years, especially Clonazepam, were not right for me. It puts me in a more depressed state that I couldn't get out of. Nor could I leave it on my own because I could convulse from cutting off the intake suddenly. So my psychiatrist started playing with the drugs. I felt that my brain was like a DJ's turntable. I could feel how they played with my brain with so much medication that I received that acts on the Central Nervous System, and that balances the chemicals in the brain. On the second day they eliminated the Clonazepam. And there was the real awakening. It felt like a switch had been flipped in my brain that had been turned off all my life. Yes, my 40 years. With so many medication changes I felt strange. The panic attacks were 5 and 6 a day but I felt safe because I was in a place where they would help me. After so many talks with psychiatrists, psychologists, social workers, nurses and others; finally, on the fifth or sixth day, the drug cocktail began to work. I felt weird, but somehow difficult to explain, I felt myself. It is as if they had crossed out my life for that period that I was in that spiral, colliding with existing logs in my mind and breaking my nails imaginatively trying to climb the dark and black well in which I was sunk. Two other diagnoses are added to the previous ones: Insomnia and Psychosis (racing thoughts, visual, tactile and auditory hallucinations, episodes of schizophrenia, and others).
There are four medications that I take daily, and six doses a day. I take Sertraline (Zoloft), Lorazepam (Ativan) three times a day, Temazepam (Restoril) and Quetiapine Fumarate (Seroquel). With this new panorama I began a new stage in my life. I knew that it was necessary for me to take medication and psychotherapy. Sometimes I look back and wonder why I didn't do it sooner. But quickly I thank God that I was able to stand up and say "I need help." Because I couldn't alone.
I can't deny that being aware of so many medications, appointments, and so on bothers me a bit, but I have to. For me, for my children. I cried with my children remembering the dark moments I spent curled up in bed. A body that seemed inert, that seemed to feel nothing, was feeling everything.
Warning ⚠️ TW Trigger Warning
As for my anxiety and my depression, they have no cure, only treatment, but I am willing to continue working with my mind and my body to be stable. Stable. That is the correct word. Not bad or good, stable. Because nothing is magic, there are days and there are days. From my PTSD I was able to overcome entering the kitchen. Yes, after my husband died, I couldn't go into the kitchen. If I looked I would just recreate the scene of his death over and over again. Now, almost two years after his death, I can say that I am cooking as before. There are days when I do have hallucinations and I see him lying there. But I struggle with my mind and I can keep myself in the kitchen doing what I was doing.
Today, I can say that I feel stable. That I am not ashamed to say that I am a mental patient. That I am not ashamed of having sought help. That I do not regret having looked for it. Now I can smile and enjoy life with my children and remember the good times with my beloved husband who May Rest In Peace.
If you made it this far, thanks for reading. I could have written much more, but there are things that are not told to everyone nor do I find the need. The message I want to carry through this story is that we should not be ashamed or embarrassed about seeking help when it comes to mental health. Let's put the stigma aside. Talk to your psychologist, tell him how you feel. Take the medication. Pray to God or take refuge in your religious belief if you have one. Be happy. The glass is half full, not half empty. Help exists. I want myself alive and I want you alive too. You're not alone. If you are suffering from a mental problem, the help is real. I looked for it and it gaves me back the will to live. I have gone back to dreaming, reading, putting on makeup; in short, my hobbies. Needless to say, I am extremely proud of what I have done with my life. And the missing path will be one of blessings in the name of God.
If you feel that this summary of my story can help someone, you can confidently share. Moreover, I would love for you to do so, because this way these words can reach more people who may need to read them.
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depression
|
I would say i love myself, there is alot of things that i like about myself, but i always just get the feeling that everything i do is stupid and wrong and that i shouldnt enjoy what i enjoy, do you guys have the same thing?
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OCD
|
Hi.
Just wondering which is more ADHD friendly.
For context, I’m 15m and inattentive-type. The thing I struggle most with in school is homework/long projects, I tend to do great in 1hr exams.
I like doing practical work, but didn’t choose art/drama/DT/etc for GCSE because at GCSE they’re mostly theory. My favourite subjects currently are Maths, Biology, Physics , and Latin; my least favourite are French and English.
My goal is to get into medicine.
Should I do BTEC or A-Level?
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ADHD
|
About a month ago, I was diagnosed with OCD, and it's made figuring out my gender identity really difficult and painful once I realized it was playing such a big role in it. I am constantly afraid that I'm not truly transgender or dysphoric--even though I'm still questioning, deep down I see my life being much happier if I transition, however I check so many detrans boxes and have so many doubts that the intrusive thoughts seem very real. These lead to a lot of exhausting, sometimes harmful compulsions like one I asked about [here](https://www.reddit.com/r/trans/comments/m41l36/i_purposely_trigger_my_gender_dysphoria_and_cant/?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3), not knowing it was OCD-related at the time.
Therapy has been alright, and I'll be trying ERP with a specialist in about a week. However, I'm really worried that when I start, I'll realize that all my intrusive thoughts were justified. Furthermore, the only specialist available to me is based in a religious background, and I'm worried she'll refuse to treat me on the grounds of my OCD just being me coming to terms with the fact I'm not transgender. It's been very difficult not to get in my head about things, and none of my regular coping skills are helping. I've already caved into a few compulsions already, and I'm scared I'll do something stupid.
Is there anyone else who's dealing with this? Any advice for me? I really need it. And please, no reassurance related to my gender identity--no matter how much I want it, I know it'll only make things worse for me in the end. Thanks in advance.
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OCD
|
When I was 16 my stepdad shot and killed my mom and then killed him self. They were married for a long time, both heavily struggled with mental illness and drug addictions. They were both fairly abusive to each other, but the loved each other my god did they love each other. This was six years ago. Since then I’ve always kind of been afraid that whoever I was in a relationship with would get tired of me and my problems and do the same thing. I’ve been in 3 serious relationships since she died and I never told any of them because like who wants to hear that their significant other is afraid you’ll kill them, they’ll wonder how I could ever think of them that way or think they could do something like that. But I didn’t think my stepdad could do something like that and he did. You never really know someone. I’m afraid I’m gonna have this fear for the rest of my life.
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ptsd
|
Hey all, hope you're having a lovely Thanksgiving.
I'm a 20F who is currently trying to get my life sorted out. Covid has hindered that a lot, causing me to drop out of uni in early March. This has been the year that I've really started to put my mental health first. I attend counselling once a week and also a separate DBT class once a week as well. I check in with my doctor every few months or so. I also saw a psychologist in May who gave me suggestions on medication as well. I am currently medically exempt from working because of my mental state, but I really want to start studying again and become a functioning human being. But, I'm so overwhelmed. I get so overwhelmed to the point that I self destruct. I self harm, skin pick, cry, starve myself, and/or hide in my bed for hours on end. I can't even begin to describe how horrible the feeling is. My throat becomes dry, my heart races, my gut tightens and I barely sleep. I wouldn't wish this feeling on anyone it's so horrible. I cry so often because of how horrible the feeling is. I'm usually anxious most times, I have to force myself to attend counselling and the DBT class because I hate having people see me. I'm so scared of seeing the doctor that sometimes I cry before I leave to see him. It's hard for me to go outside because of how overwhelmed I get. Nowhere feels safe to me. My counsellor is helping me find community mental health services that can help me establish goals and become more independent, but I'm so scared.
I am clinically diagnosed with PTSD, and the psychologist I saw suggested I may have BPD, but nothing has really come of that because of corona. I take 130mg of venlafaxine in the morning. I take melatonin but it only makes me sleep at most for 2 hours. It sucks because I want to be more than what I am now, but being sexually assaulted and harassed at my old work, plus years of childhood abuse has left me feeling scared, weak, and overwhelmed a lot of the time. I live in a small town and there aren't many mental health resources around. I really want some advice on how to be an actual adult rather being a scared child trapped in an adults body. Thanks
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ptsd
|
When I was younger I thought it was funny to be mean to siri, mostly because my mom would get mad at me for it. I recently saw someone say that being mean to siri means you'd probably be mean to a real person if you didn't think there would be any consequences, and I know how ridiculous it is but now I can't stop thinking about that. I just hate how ocd makes your emotions so irrational and there's no way to rationalize it, and in fact trying to do so makes the ocd worse. It's so tiring to do this every day while people say shit that makes my ocd worse all the time.
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OCD
|
First, i need to apologize in advance because English is not my main language.
So if you don´t understand shit of what i´m saying that´s why.
So, as far as i know i have Asperger syndrome.
and it got diagnosed recently. (like 5 months ago.)
so, story time:
When i was like 6-7 yrs old my mom had this son of a bitch boyfriend i´ll call R.
And we where having breakfast at some random restaurant.
R:Hey why are you eating with your left hand?
Ok, so brief pause here.
When i was a kid I used my left hand for a lot of things. like i´m pretty sure i was a leftie.
So i just tell him that like you know, i use my left hand for shit.
and he just goes and hits me in the hand every time I used it.
Like we would be having dinner and he would just slap my left hand.
this went on like for a year, until I switched to my right hand.
Then, it all started.
Bed wetting
felling sad
poor concentration
BUT MAINLY MY DAMN HANDWRITING
Like, it was not good before BUT DAMN IT LOOKS HORRIBLE.
Right now, if i try to use my left hand for anything I cant.
Its so difficult now. and right now i Just always feel like unmotivated, this like sensation of not sadness but like melancholy.
Now you would be saying: Ok, but exactly how does your hand preferment switch relates with all this stuff?
So, i´ve been reading about this recently.
[https://www.anythinglefthanded.co.uk/being-lh/children/changing-left-to-right.html](https://www.anythinglefthanded.co.uk/being-lh/children/changing-left-to-right.html)
So. the question is.
If i got my hands switched and also, i have aspergers
Can i switch back?
like, to using my left hand.
I don´t know if this is the right place to ask, but i just don´t know anyone else to talk to.
I know this all looks like a bunch of random bullshit, and maybe you're right.
But i just need to know this.
Any aspie here that got his hand preferment switched?
I need to talk to that human being and ask them some questions.
Also if you think this is all nonsense just tell me. I dont even know whats happening with my mind right now.
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aspergers
|
At the risk of sounding like a spoilt materialistic brat.. I've come to realize that one of my triggers are what used to motivate me.
These last few years have been hard for me emotionally. Yep, part of what brought me down was financial. Not because of covid... covid has actually helped me. Situation has been steadily improving.
I've come to realise that what used to motivate me is becoming a trigger.
Homes.
I've always wanted a place of my own. Part of it is because, even though I have a somewhat o-k home where my family loves me, I hate living \*with\* them. Let's put it this way - if you did one of those 'first word that comes to mind' game with me, if you said 'family', my reply would be 'burden'.
Anyway. Homes, and beautiful homes, used to motivate me.
For example, sometimes to decompress, I would go to Ikea to walk around, and I'd figure out what I'd like to have in my future home.
Now, it still helps a little bit, but after awhile, I'll just realise that I'll never be able to get what I want, I can literally feel my heart drop, and then my whole world turns dark, and I'll feel tears welling up.
Just now, there was an advertorial for a home that is totally 'my type' of home. The more I read about it, the more I watch the videos and see the photos, the sadder I become. That feeling of 'I'll never have this' comes up, my heart sinks, and I'll go into that spiral, and I'll start thinking about... what's the point of all this.. why bother.. etc..
I've become aware of this trigger for other things as well, but so far, I've had the strongest reaction when it comes to homes.
You know 'the bigger they come, the harder they fall'? Like, I'll get the appreciation, like wow, such a nice home, totally what I'd like to get, then after that burst of positivity, it'll fall down hard.
I clearly need help. How do you handle this?
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depression
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Obvious disclaimer that everyone can react differently to different meds.
I'm curious about people who switched from one to the other. Which was more effective? How did your side effects differ between them? Why did you/your doctor decide to switch? Are there cons to the ones you prefer?
I'm on vyvanse extended and I'm thinking of asking to switch to quick. I don't want to deal with these side effects all day 7 days a week, even though they are VERY effective and helpful. I would rather take them as needed so I can have a normal appetite/be less socially awkward in my off hours. But my psych has warned me that yoyo-ing like that can make side effects worse. I won't take this as medical advice, I'd just like to get a sense of others' experiences.
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ADHD
|
I have been managing chronic depression for 6 years now. The initial 3 years were lost and full of misery but I have picked myself up since then and done quite good with the latter 3 years.
I am keen on knowing and following writings/blogs of people who are living, thriving, sometimes just existing with their mundane life. I want to know how they feel and pick themselves up (on those meh days) at work or when at university. How do they deal with relationships. How do they plan trips. Are they able to keep up with all the events on the calendar or they skip some. Do they have eventful careers or how their job is. Just basic blogging. If the kind folks out here have something like this or similar in mind, please attach the link. Light!
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depression
|
Mine is 86, "It wasn't me" by Shaggy.
I know, I know... haha
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aspergers
|
It's my day off, I'm freaking tired. I literally don't want to do anything. I tried to do yoga, nope. Tried working out, nope. Tried reading my book, nope. I don't want to watch TV. I just want to sleep but I slept 18 hours last night - seems excessive.
I feel this way a lot with my free time, in that I don't know what the heck to do with it. Nothing seems alluring, everything feels too hard, even my hobbies sometimes. If I can hold out long enough doing a task, sometimes it becomes fun, like playing guitar, but that process takes so darn long and I hate every minute of it until it gets slightly easier.
The semester is over so there's no fire under my ass to get shit done. So I'm just here wallowing in my "wtf do I do" mood until my dinner plans tonight.
What do you do when you don't want to do anything?
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ADHD
|
I feel hugely guilty for my actions 24/7. Someone wants to hangout and I can’t or a do something I want to do despite someone else not wanting me to and I feel like an awful person. I feel so crazy guilty and responsible for other peoples feelings and it has been feeling like I’m a horrible person all of the time. Is this something other people with OCD experience? Or is this something else entirely?
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OCD
|
I’m being hard on myself for letting a day on the calendar ruin my day. The 23rd was the anniversary of my abuser and I. Every month its debilitating to me. I know the memories can’t hurt me, but the physical things I feel are very real. I can’t keep this up every single month. Any suggestions? I don’t want to miss work because of this.
Thank you
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ptsd
|
Hey guys. Honestly I’m asking here because I feel I can’t be honest with people in my life. Working on that.
Lately I’ve been more stressed and anxious than usual. Really cloudy. I’m the type of person that gets really hyper vigilant when I start to notice habits.
I am prescribed 5mg instant release adderall 1-3x a day on days needed. Lately I’ve been taking it every day. It makes me feel calm and seems to be keeping the anxious demons away from my doorstep.
However, I’ve been doing things that aren’t technically bad, but scare me. First off, I am addicted to nicotine (juul) but that’s not new. I don’t drink a lot, but I’ve been drinking nearly a full bottle of wine every night this week. Ugh the headache. I also have been taking Seraquel at night because I get sad and just want to knock out. I drink 2 small sugar free redbulls a day. I just feel like I’m spiraling out
I think I just need an outsider to not be mad at me and just tell me objectively whether I’m already at risk here. Feels like a bender maybe? Advice on how to get out of this?
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ADHD
|
Never felt I needed therapy when I was younger but, after years of people saying there's something up and that i'm not normal, I caved and asked my mom if I could try therapy. So after a month or two of therapy I was diagnosed with major depression and social anxiety [2015], baker acted due to self harm and suicidal ideation, then diagnosed with asd around 2016 I think. It certainly answered some of my unspoken questions, not all of them, but i've never been one to quickly deny things like that. I've sat with these diagnoses for 6-ish years and decided just yesterday that i'm vaguely doubtful and feel like something else may be present as well. Gonna be long, sorry if this should be posted somewhere else
**The things not explained are as follows:**
My emotions almost always feel muted/quiet; Like if you visualize them, it's kinda like looking at someone through fog or frosted glass; Like the person is visible, you see them fairly well, but their edges go sorta soft and dissipate into the air around them. That's what most of my emotions are like. Like happiness or sadness are definitely felt and experienced, but at like 80 or 90%. Most things don't get me very excited or giddy, I just feel sort of blasé the majority of the time. Not good, not bad, just kind of meh. Only my dad is able to get me from 0 to 100 in no time flat [he can be very... difficult]. [Reference to what I mean](https://www.reddit.com/r/toxicparents/comments/omalpj/this_is_long_but_i_need_to_just_get_it_out_there/). Besides him and that singular friend mentioned below, most things don't affect me much at all
I don't need much, if any, social interaction. People really don't interest me. Yes, socializing can make me anxious, but I genuinely don't want to make friends. I have 1 [one] friend that I talk to regularly. The only other people I talk to are my parents. I can have a single, brief conversation with a friend/acquaintance in a 5 year period and be completely content and ok with it. No one I explain this to can comprehend that and a lot of people take it personally
Since around age 12 or so compliments or insults don't make much of an impact, if any. They hold no value to me. Also someone's social standing has no importance to how I treat them. You could be an actor, a homeless person, the president, a noted criminal, a musician, etc and you will be treated like every other average joe. You won't get special treatment, fawned over, or treated with disgust. You'll just be treated like a person
I consider myself asexual, as in not sexually attracted to people, and have zero interest in an intimate relationship. They don't interest me, i'm not fond of people at the best of times, and if my drive decides it wants to act up i'll take care of it myself, just like any other bodily function [eating, using the restroom, etc. etc]. I'd rather not do that either but it must be taken care of and it's unnecessary to involve anyone else. I do not crave or long for intimacy of that nature
Though there's no reason to, if a dream tells me something vague i'm very likely to serious consider whatever it is or do what it says [if I deem it reasonable]. It feels like a message that I need to listen to, even if it doesn't really make sense. One real example was from a few years ago where a dream said something about needing to look after the "golden boy". It felt like it was like a protection order of some kind and had an ominous vibe. I had no idea what that meant, thought about it for a few hours, and figured "Well, my mom's dog is blond and male. That's probably what the dream was referring to", then I promptly looked after him much closer than normal, just in case the dream was right [nothing ended up happening]. Another from Tuesday, December 1, 2020: A dream version of my friend in Utah sent me a text saying "*02-01-21 got it ?*". Woke up and informed him i'd be calling him on February 1st of 2021, my hatred of phonecalls be damned, because dream-him told me to. Ended up forgetting about it, felt uneasy and wigged out for a while, but nothing ended up happening
In 2013, for zero reason, I was convinced I was being stalked. I don't hang out with people and spent nearly the entire summer inside my house [because I like solitary indoor activities]. The delusion(?) stopped but the weird paranoia has persisted. There are some exposed screws in our shower and I feel the need to cover the drive, the indent at the top of a screw, with either a washcloth or bar soap. For reasons unknown my brain is certain that something can see me through them. Back in high school I had to cover the eyes on my posters with sticky notes because the paranoia got so bad. Those sticky notes stayed there for two years. It hasn't been like that for a long while and the most I feel now is like invisible things watch me. So, like the good hostess I am, I make my internal monologue external so that anyone/thing that may be listening won't feel confused if I randomly start laughing [like if I think of a joke from a month ago]
For many years now I haven't really experienced the drive/motivation to get a move on with anything in life. There are no goals to speak of besides just existing and doing my own thing [taking care of my plants, animals, and that one friend who has a laundry list of issues]. That's all I want. I'm content to live like a recluse or hermit, as i've come to realize that I function best when mostly alone
Apparently being really neutral about most things bothers people and they normally think i'm hiding my opinions. I'm not trying to be like this, there's zero reason for me to be concerned with what they might think about me or my opinions, I just don't typically care one way or another. If we're talking and they're really emotional I can be rather clinical with how I come across, unintentionally making it worse by making them feel unheard or invalidated. I try best to approach these matters in a very objective way, providing different kinds of perspectives and advice to hopefully counteract their messy emotions. Not good at being comforting unfortunately and am better at giving answers and the like. I'm sure you can see why that doesn't always go well
My daydreams are very detailed, weaving together a plot that can last for a few years. Most of them include me [living in a cabin in the woods](https://www.reddit.com/r/UnsentLetters/comments/pf20s0/so_what_now/) and assisting troubled people, as if I was a therapist or guide. Like my objectivity and openness to discuss difficult and taboo topics will somehow lead these people to make a breakthrough. It's even noted that we don't have to talk at all until they want to and that, though they could come back if they need help again, it's expected that they leave at some point. Ideally i'd be alone the vast majority of the time
I really don't want there to be anything else going on with me, how I live currently is good enough for me but unsustainable for the future. Trying to look up some of these feelings provides me with results of people debating on whether they have ASD or SPD. Reading people's experiences with SPD and the entire entry on it in the DSM 5, which i'm well aware doesn't mean much, felt like a very direct call out. What isn't answered with that though is the weird paranoia-like issues that I experience. Maybe I really am just an apathetic and depressed autistic with social anxiety. All I know is that there's a number of things that have never fallen into place or been addressed, even when i've directly asked about what may explain these things. Not gonna make a big deal out of it, just wondering if anyone here has felt *any of the things* I have mentioned above. I just want answers so I know how to move forward. Whenever I start therapy again i'll ask for their thoughts
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aspergers
|
I’m a 19 yo college male struggling with some pretty severe anxiety and depression. I go out to a lot of social events and have met so many people. Everyone seems to think I’m a super uplifting and outgoing person, which I love to hear. Yet no matter how many people I meet or what I do, I feel so so so alone.
To the point where I know everyone but have very few/no good, real friends. I’m in no group chats, nobody is hitting up my phone/snap, nobody asks me to hang out.
I feel most like myself and the most happy when I am in a talkative and high energy mood. But unfortunately 99% of the time, I feel like I have no social battery/too much anxiety to enjoy my moments with others. It feels like I have brain fog/a mental block and I’m always just nodding along to others and agreeing and I’m unable to contribute as much as I want to because I have nothing to say. Group settings are the absolute worst. I want to enjoy them so badly but I get so anxious and shut down.
I can’t live like this any longer where I’m unable to access my natural, extroverted self. I feel consistently unfulfilled by my relationships and thus life overall.
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depression
|
I just want someone to see how much im suffering and I want someone to hug me while I cry and I need someone right now but im 900 miles away from my friends and I have no one in my family I can talk to right now and I've been struggling a lot recently and im trying to get better and physically I am but mentally im hanging on by a thread I don't know how many more smiles I can fake before I shatter
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depression
|
Your in a conversation with someone, your drifting in and out of the conversation, then you listen to what’s being said, all of a sudden you come up with something absolutely earth shattering brilliant and important to say, but you have to fight that Aaaarrgghh Shut up I’ve got to tell you this right now feeling, but you wait for them to finish because you’ve learned that’s polite and the sociable thing to do but they can notice that you want to say something, but continue to talk on, you can’t process what they’re saying anyway because your over here with this brilliant probably irrelevant to the conversation piece of genius your going to say, then they finish and say what was you going to say, 🤷♂️ nope soz it’s gone, in that zillionth of a second between you finishing your sentence and then my brain engaging to speak maybe the answer to the meaning of life as just gone poof into oblivion, probably never to be seen again 🤣🤣
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ADHD
|
My entire body fucking hurtsssss please make it stop I am suffering enough already
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depression
|
If anyone could help me out I would appreciate it. Friend of mine quit their job in may this year and has been living off savings, they were able to move out of a bad situation and get their own place. They have developed horrible anxiety in which it’s hard for them to get outside leading them to quit. I won’t get into it but something traumatic happened to someone at their job and I don’t think it helped the situation They are in therapy and says it’s helping them and they have made progress but it’s been 6 months they’ve been home alone everyday. We hang out more these days but I’m just wondering if I can do or say more, we talk on the phone everyday a couple times a day too :). When I do hang out with them I can tell they are struggling to keep up with their hygiene, I don’t judge them at all as I know it’s hard and they constantly say how they are productive some days but burnout quickly and then won’t do anything for weeks. They’ve had a really traumatic childhood and are just getting away from their past. What would you say or do to help them?
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depression
|
Hi, I’m a 45 year old female with ocd since childhood. I’ve always had an intense fear of “not being myself anymore”. I’m a graphic designer, illustrator and tattooist, so my basic fear revolves around loosing my skills.
Last month my dad had covid and was seriously ill (thankfully he recovered), but I was extremely upset, and when my mom broke the news, a thought crossed my mind: “if he survives, you should wait a year to get new tattoos”.
I love getting tattoos, that’s a big part of my life. I knew something like that would bring me immense stress. So here I am, knowing it wasn’t a “true promise”, but at the same time extremely afraid to break it. I could wait a year, but it feels like avoidance behavior and a failure to tackle my ocd. At the same time I’m very afraid of the stress I’d go through if I dare to break the “ocd promise”.
Help me please?
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OCD
|
just wondering, due to things I read online I get the feelings i might be faking having adhd.
​
in highschool , i barely asserted myself and was able to scoot on by with B's and C's.
​
I'm a super senior in college now. I used to be able to take a full load of classes and still manage C's in my previous classes. Now I've reached a point where I only take one class and work more due to the insane amount of bills and debt I have to tend to now.
​
I was tested positive for adhd. That really boring test where you have to click the letter you see and click when you hear beeps and all that. I unfortunately don't really get my adderall from the pharmacy since its so expensive.
​
but still, when I see people , way younger than 26 getting their lives together , while i'm here getting my undergrad still , and I think back to how much easier things were for me in grade school, I feel kinda confused.
​
I've now reached a point where if I don't pass my finals for the third time, I might have to switch majors or even colleges.
​
I know a lot of signs point to the fact I should fork out the cash to buy my adderall, but at the same time I'm always left wondering "what if I just applied myself a little more? what if my dad is right about me using adhd as a false excuse to be lazy?"
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ADHD
|
I don’t like crying often because it makes me feel weak but sometimes it’s nice and this is one of those times where I think it would be. Except the problem is I can’t, I’m sad but nothing happens. This is from OCD right? Because the intrusive thoughts interrupt my sad thoughts and take priority, forcing me to do compulsions and I can’t focus on anything but the intrusive thoughts I guess. Crying has now been replaced by staring at a wall, zoning in and out, being anxious. Sad music doesn’t even do the trick anymore.
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OCD
|
It's not a placebo for me anymore. I know this because I've been medicated for over 10 days now.
- on workdays, I get up way earlier for work and am in half an hour early when ordinarily I would sleep in for the maximum amount of time and would just arrive into work on time.
- At weekends, I wake up at latest 10am whereas I would have usually slept in until maybe 12pm.
Now since going sober, getting up somewhat early on weekends hasn't been a big deal, but the work week has absolutely changed for the better.
Ever since being medicated, I've been flipped right side up 🙂
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ADHD
|
Okay this is something that is like a massive issue for me. I can not make small decisions. Like choose a whine brand when I don't know any of the brands. Or choose what kind of take out I want. Its the worst. I just malfunction and don't make any decision. I once took 1,5 hrs to choose a take out restaurant, eventhough I already was extremely hungry.
So now I have this app called "tiny decisions" and it just randomly chooses for you. I'm use there are other apps who do the same but I know I like this one haha.
I thought I'd pose about it one here since I've heard a lot of ppl with adhd also struggle with decision making. And when it comes to things like ordering take out, your decision doesn't really matter. So why not let a random app make the decision for you🤣
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ADHD
|
I'm 17, and after years of thinking something was pretty off with how I was functioning finally had a burst of motivation and powered through getting an assessment. Was too impatient to wait for the NHS so I worked my way into a pediatric assessment (even though I'm almost 18) through PUK within 2 weeks.
I've now had my assessment today, been diagnosed with ADHD-C, and prescribed medication that'll arrive in the next three weeks, because I'm pediatric and the waiting times are much shorter.
It's all just happening very quickly? I'm feeling pretty numb from today and I don't know how to feel?
I don't feel like I've gotten any time to actually talk about how it all makes me feel, how much frustration has been stewing since I can remember. I hate that my parents are acting like it's all fixed and done with, that now we can all move forward.
I feel like I'm still stuck as a little kid not understanding why everyone else could act normal and I couldn't. Or the frustrated A-level student who could ace exams, but cried over coursework every single night. I feel like I should be feeling that it's all vindicated, and triumphant, but I'm a bit ?????? that it's all over.
Does anyone else feel like this? How do I absorb the diagnosis even though I've been sure I've had it for years?
​
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ADHD
|
I’m a social worker and I run a small community nonprofit for vulnerable neighbors. I love what I do but I definitely need to be aware of my belongings at all times. As I’m sure you can guess given this is an ADHD sub, this is not something I excel at and my bag disappeared tonight. It was a few minutes before I realized my airpods were in there with an airtag. It was 9:02. I grabbed my friend and we drove to where they were. The man was sitting on the sidewalk, I apologized and said I thought there had been a mix up at our site. I asked if he had my things, he said he did not. My friend pinged my tag and he couldn’t deny it. He told me to look through his bag and I found mine. I bought him cigarettes to say thank you as he apologized profusely stating he did not mean to steal it. By 9:18, I was on my way home.
I say all this this because the biggest benefit is that I am not beating myself up right now because I knew better than to leave my stuff out. Instead, I’ve created a system that is more effective for managing my tendency to lose things.
Obviously airtags aren’t cheap but for the price, I saved myself buying new headphones!
TLDR: airtag saved the day, 100% worth it 🙌
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ADHD
|
Holy shit! People are out in droves today 😩
I feel like grocery stores are the epitome of NT/narcissistic behavior. The majority of people there behave as if their shopping trip is of top precedent.
If you are polite it's an inconvenience to the 'hustle and bustle' of traffic. So off-putting! My anxiety is soaring right now jeebus. I honestly never want to go back ever again.
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aspergers
|
Hello! I guess I am what is considered a NT but I have a brother who is on the autism spectrum. A little bit about him.. he becomes hyper focused on movies, movie trailers, and video games, he has a hard time with abstract thinking, he takes things quite literally, doesn’t understand sarcasm, and is extremely good at sports (I don’t know if any of these are typical traits of autism or not they are just things I’ve noticed about him). He really struggled in school, particularly with math. He does pretty well at subjects that are straight memorization of facts. He is in his freshman year of college and he feels completely lost about what to study and what he wants to do as a career. He struggles with low self esteem, he doesn’t feel like he is good at anything, and he has even said he feels worthless. It breaks my heart that he feels so badly about himself because he is one of the kindest, most loving people I know and he has such a good heart. I am looking for feedback on what types of job may be good for someone with high functioning autism or what I can do to help him find a job that he can enjoy that can help him feel more fulfilled and confident. Any ideas or feedback are much appreciated :)
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aspergers
|
And if you can't talk to that one person, then you don't feel like talking to anyone else?
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aspergers
|
Hello there,
So this is a bit of a different post. My partner has ptsd and I was just wondering how I can be there for him, how I can help without him feeling like he needs the help. We used to live together so it was a little easier because I could kinda take some chores and stuff off his shoulders but I had to move away (different countries) because my visa ran out and now I won't see him for 5 months. So just any advice on how to deal with it, especially with the distance would be greatly appreciated. It's so hard knowing that he is not doing well at the moment and I just don't know what to do or how to support him
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ptsd
|
I live in a state where mj is legal. My significant other has his medical card for certain pains he will have chronically for life instead of taking pain meds. He saw someone virtually a few months ago for a consult and was told he showed all symptoms of adult add/adhd but wouldn't be able to get meds because of being a medical card holder.
Is there any way to get around this? I feel like it's holding him back from enjoying life to its fullest
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ADHD
|
Seriously.. I can't figure out why.. I've given up on all of my hopes and dreams. I'm 32 years old, 10 years single, and entirely alone. I can't even get referrals for referral programs..I have 0 friends. Every time I see that 'Refer a friend and get $10' or some crap like that I'm just reminded that I have no friends. I was definitely not born in the right time as this is 100% a social era. Why do I even have a phone? It never goes off unless something bad is happening. I don't fit. No one likes me. I'm a total asshole. And I hate my life more than anything in this world. 3+ years on \~8 dating sites and nothing to show for it pretty much guarantees that I'm going to die alone. I literally don't even look at potential matches anymore. I swipe right on everyone. I still only get a match a week.. which is better than my never getting matches... but... they're all bots. Fuck this.
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depression
|
I've got a referral through right of access but just been told that my assessment will not be in March like i was told but October 2022. It seems that due to the NHS complete failure in this area lots of people are choosing the right of access but there only seems to be 2 options; ADHD 360 Psychiatry-UK so they are overwhelmed.
I've looked online for private assessments but they all seem to be £900+ just for the assessment, has anyone found any place doing private assessments for <£500, ideally offering a remote assessment (excluding ADHD 360 & Psychiatry-UK)?
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ADHD
|
They all are going to school consistently, are working and probably have energy to do the things they love. While I'm here unable to move because i'm paralyzed by fear and can't eat for days on end. It all feels so unfair.
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ptsd
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All my life I have had the feeling that no one understands me or wants to understand me. I haven't been in this community that long (and the diagnostic procedure is still pending), but I feel very comfortable and understood here. A lot of the posts speak from my heart and it makes me very emotional that (many) other people are like me and face the same challenges as me. Thank you everyone.
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aspergers
|
Anybody else awake and most active at night, I find myself dying to go out and be creative as soon as the sun sets, the problem is it's kind of hollow when you're on your own, I always wish I had one or two other lost auto boys to div about with, there's so much to do at night but experiencing it alone does actually get a bit sad
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aspergers
|
I have a hard time with jealousy and hate but I’ve recently discovered this…
When observing people, tell yourself that they are depressed and this thing they’re doing now is in spite of that
I’ve found it makes me love them for having the courage to do or say whatever they’re doing
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depression
|
i was raised by someone who’s worked with therapists for a long time to manage her ocd and she does a really great job with it. im super proud of her.
so when i moved in with one of my best friends and he told me he had OCD i thought i know what to expect. he apologizes compulsively and asks for reassurance so much that it drains me emotionally sometimes
i don’t know how to approach him, or if i even should. i don’t know how to respond to his compulsions in a way that’s gonna be healthy for both of us. my other roommates feed his compulsions so much and it makes me so uncomfortable.
today we were having a conversation and he was asking for reassurance if it was okay that he was a couple weeks late paying my boyfriend some money he owes him even though he had already talked to my boyfriend about it. i told him nobody is mad at him but my boyfriend really does need the money. he was apologizing over and over so much i started dissociating and just let him tire himself out i guess.
i told him my boyfriend just wanted to remind him about the money and he thanked me for reassuring him.
i really care about him and our friendship. how should i respond to him or talk to him about this without pushing him away or enabling his ocd?
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OCD
|
Does anyone remember the logic behind the "undo" technique at Rogers and what that was? I think it was alongside our submits & resists if I remember correctly.
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OCD
|
ive been taking 100mg sertraline for a while now (couple months) and it hasnt really helped. all its done is make me cry less, but hasnt really gotten to any of my actual issues. ive been saying to my doctor that it was working because i was scared i might feel worse coming off it, but i still desperately need something for feeling paranoid all the time (among other things like auditory hallucinations and stuff). can antipsychotics help for ocd? will i have to come off my other medication to go on antipsychotics? how is easy is it (in the uk atleast) to get given antipsychotics by a doctor (since i'm worried they'll pry into me too much)? i know it's alot of questions but i'd appreciate any and all answers. thanks :)
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OCD
|
My son recently started ADHD medication, and his doctor said we could open it and pour into some applesauce. He's a very picky kid and doesn't like applesauce. I tried it in a spoonful of yogurt this morning, he said he could feel the medication in it and nearly spit it out, so I don't think that's going to be a good long term solution. It works on some breakfast foods but not others (falls off), I've tried pouring it in liquid but then it gets stuck to the side of the container when he drinks it.
This sounds so dumb but my dog has pill treats, do they make those for kids?? Do I just need to get him over his fear of swallowing pills? Did any of you have to take it in some special way as a child? My son's cooperative in trying different methods, we just haven't found one he's happy with that we can use daily.
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ADHD
|
Whenever I try to express my feelings, state my opinions on the society or something I learned about how the world functions (these are the things I'm really interested in), people ask me if I'm high then laugh like I made a joke or something. I don't understand why people ask that when I am just trying to express myself/my opinions. It's like shooting my hypothesis down for no reason at all. I have trouble making friends and it's really disappointing when I find someone that I can share my thoughts with and they dismiss it like that. I don't think my thoughts are so bad to be deemed as hallucinatory. They are quite realistic, and practical questions/views.
This has happened about 4-5 times now which makes me question if I should share my thoughts with others at all. What if these thoughts are controversial or a taboo breaking some sort of a social code. My idea of a conversation is clearly different from most people as I like to talk about why people behave the way they do. Not the person I'm talking to, but things like why are people so addicted to TikTok or why does small talk exist etc. I'm not a diagnosed aspie, but I'm waiting for the assessment.
Interested to know if others get asked this question too.
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aspergers
|
And just never wake up. Not go to my stupid job again. Not deal with people disappointing me, hurting me or bothering me. Not think about going to school. Not dealing with the boyfriend I chose to move in with. I just don’t want any of this. I just want to sleep forever
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depression
|
Recently have begun to realize how important this is in NT relationships.
1. Don't tell a friend you "I don't want to go to your game night". Say you can't make it.
2. Don't ask someone "do you want to go on a date(or worse netflix and chill)". Ask them if they want to check out a new restaurant with you.
3. Don't tell your coworker "I don't think your ask as high priority". Tell them you will get to it when you can.
All of these things feel super dishonest to me. Not in like a moral way, they just feel viscerally unpleasant. And NTs clearly understand what the euphemisms mean. But they use them anyway. And worse the "honest" form of communication has other meanings in the NT world.
1. "I don't want to go" means I don't like you.
2. "Would you like to go on a date" means I am super confident we are already both into one another or I am desperate. And asking about sex out of the blue means I want to make you fear me.
3. "I think your ask is low priority" means I think you are bad at your job.
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aspergers
|
I can’t count the amount of times I’ve heard some bullshit like “oh, you don’t LOOK autistic”, or whatever variant of that. Or when people assume that autistic women on TikTok are faking it because they’re hot and assume it’s just for views and attention.
Why is this? Idk if it’s the media’s portrayal of it or whatever other harmful stereotype it is… it’s just weird. And icky.
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aspergers
|
I have a diagnosis of bipolar 2 but have some childhood trauma. My hope is to work through the trauma and see if the bipolar symptoms resolve because I think it’s a misdiagnosis.
Anyone have other diagnoses (like depression, bipolar, adhd, etc), work through and heal from their trauma and the symptoms of the other diagnosis went away? It seems like trauma is misdiagnosed as many things
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ptsd
|
For some context my husband and I are in our twenties and have been married for almost 2 years. He’s my absolute best friend and I adore him. He’s my world. He has been through a lot of trauma, in his childhood, and fairly recently due to family members. Recently, it’s been emotional trauma, from having a insane, manipulative mother. We lived with her for 6 months, and it was absolutely awful. I’ll spare the details, but essentially she had insisted that she changed from the person she used to be when my husband was young. She lied. And in turn treated us both terribly. But with my husband it brings back childhood trauma as well. ( I won’t get into the childhood trauma since it’s private) We are safe and trying to get back on our feet again.
However, this brings on nightmares, my husband has not had a normal sleep schedule. He’ll sleep anywhere from 5 hours of sleep to 2 hours. Some nights he doesn’t sleep. The night mares keep him up. We do have an amazing therapist we see, she helps tremendously! We’re so grateful for her! But, I wanted some advice on what I could do to help him.
If he wakes from a nightmare, should we talk it through? Does that have any benefit or does it just linger in your mind? Have anyone tried this technique called Imagery Rehearsal Therapy (IRT)and had any success?
Some things I try to do, is to ground him. I’ll ask him where are we? What state? What city? That’ll help him to see we’re safe and far away from his mother’s place.
Im really curious to hear of any suggestions or anything that’s helped any of you with this. Im so worried about him. I want him to be able to start sleeping normally, I can tell it’s wearing on him. Any response would be much appreciated , please and thank you.
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ptsd
|
Hello,
My girlfriend has severe PTSD from two specific incidents, as well as some other traumas, (not going to lie she has been through the most adversity I have ever heard of). I am struggling because she is struggling so bad. She usually refuses to seek help until things get extremely bad, and she has started seeking help again. This is good she is seeking help, but it is also extremely concerning to me. Sometimes I think She feels like I am judging her or she feels extremely guilty, I never try to do so, (I noticed sometimes she perceives what I am thinking, when usually that perception is wrong) I think it might be a defense mechanism. I am currently in grad school, not particularly in the mental health field, but work very close with it. I have tried to show as much love and support as I possibly can and ask what my girlfriend needs of me. But she seems extremely resistant.
I have never had anyone in my life with such deep trauma before, and I have done my best to educate myself, but still feel like there is more I can do. I love her so much, and she loves me, she is such an amazing person. I do not want to deny what happened to her, but I also do not see her as her trauma. however, one of the most difficult things for me is that I am the only person that knows about all of her traumas in detail. She keeps it hidden from family, friends, everyone, because she feels like she would be a burden to tell someone. I feel the opposite based on my own experience, and research by Dr. James Gordon, and how the power of healing comes from telling ones story. I just need advice as to how to be there for someone I care so much about but seems so resistant for anything...
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ptsd
|
Hey gang, a guess a bit of a warning of unintentionally self harming so skip off if you dont want to read further
Anyways, like I said, my stims are accidentally hurting me. Ive had trichotillomania for years now , thankfully I still have most of my hair , you can hardly tell , but it's been difficult to stop.
Also, I grind my teeth hard in my sleep, sometimes biting my tongue or cheek,
and then when im awake, I'll repeatedly bite it over and over again, sometimes drawing blood.
Not even always aware! Sometimes im just watching TV and I realize I've punctured my cheek.
I have things like fidget spinners, trouble with those is i set. them. down. im not used to them at all, but I've grown up used to doing these physical things like hair pulling, biting my skin that i cant just stop, I have to shift it to something else.
It's seriously bugging me because I dont like that I stim the way I do and it isn't good for me.
Please help
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aspergers
|
If you have a hard time controlling your facial expressions and someone catches you, just say you have heartburn. Everybody hates heartburn, and remember lying is mental health care. 😷
|
aspergers
|
One of things that happens is I’ll get sexual intrusive thoughts. They disturb me because they’re not things I’m actually sexually attracted to. It could be about the woman behind me in the store or the coworker that I’m alone in the room with. In the middle of the thoughts I’ll feel my heart drop and think “oh my god, did I just say that out loud?” So as a compulsion I fold my tongue in half and clench my teeth together. My teeth hurt and my tongue gets sore but I’m afraid I can’t let go otherwise I’m gonna say something obscene and it’s scary. Because I truly don’t know if it’s made up or if I actually blurt things out. Does anyone else go through this?
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OCD
|
To me, it seems like the best way to deal with that issue is to develop a dialogue about it where, when I don’t have all my feelings completely in order, I can remind myself “I don’t know all my feelings right now” and with mindful meditation I can make peace with that fact. Then, hopefully, I can gradually start to designate those feelings because they’ll be in a box labeled “I don’t know yet” rather than “bakfhworusjsiejfnsifuendnsks”.
Does this plan check out? How do y’all experience this?
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ADHD
|
will people ever start seeing us as adults? will i ever have the same worth as other 20 year olds in people's eyes? do i have to mask even harder to reach anything with them?
i lost another friend this morning who yelled at me for being so childish and saying other terrible things and calling me disgusting behind my back. i've been feeling so so good lately and was so confident in my own skin, i really started feeling like i'm a serious, attractive adult and no disability can change that but now this... is anyone going through something similar?
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aspergers
|
My mom has panic disorder and depression (and likely OCD). She sailed through life rather effortlessly until May of this year when she had one too many things she couldn't control and had what would probably be considered a break down (week with no sleep, 3 am panic attack that has turned into constant anxiety attacks).
She started a lot of psychomotor agitated tics (pacing, pulling her clothes, marching in place). She always tells me she's scared or can't do things.
Before all this she was an extroverted, productive, routine oriented go getter. She exercised every day, had tons of friends, and did a lot of volunteer work.
She has become a literal shell of herself.
It took her 2 months to see a psychiatrist, which at the first suggestions she literally fell on the floor begging me not to make her.
She went from completely self sufficient, organized, exercising every day, happy, smart, logical person to a sobbing, weepy, ragdoll, unmotivated mess.
I do not know what to do. This past few months have been literal Hell. She will NOT go shopping, it's a fight to get her to shower, she eats the bare minimum then whines about losing weight. She takes care of her dogs needs but doesn't play with him or take him to the park anymore.
Her psychiatrist recently put her on seroquel 25 mg at night (on top of I think abilify, buspar, and paxil), and she has taken to laying on the floor. I am completely lost- I miss my mom. I don't know how to help and lately just find myself getting angry at her, which I obviously know isn't helping.
I have a full time job, I can't become her caretaker, and she is pushing everyone else away. She gets mean with me too, which I know is frustration. I asked her to see a therapist and she did one session and said "It didn't work."
Her mental health is affecting mine as well and I am at a complete loss.
What can I do to help her.... any advice at all. Please... I'm desperate.
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depression
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When did it start?
I’m a week and a half in and I’m already much much nicer, so I’m waiting for the other shoe to drop.
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depression
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Trigger warning: sexual assault
So I’m someone who can typically take a joke, but for some reason this time around I exploded. I was sexually assaulted 3 yrs ago for some context. My sister has made slut shaming jokes before like one time she said she didn’t want me drinking from the same cup as her kids not knowing where my mouth has been. I laughed it off.
This time though, I asked my sister to send pics so I can edit them and she says, “For what? To use it on your tinder?” As soon as she said this, I lost all control and I lashed out. I told her that I felt disrespected and she kept saying why I say this joke to any of my friends.
I threw everything in the house. I slammed my foot on my broken glass, cut my neck, and slammed my head into the wall. The police were called and I was told it was adrenaline from PTSD. What upsets me is that I have vocalized my triggers. I’ve noticed I explode when someone says something insensitive or invalidates me or they don’t apologize (since I never got an apology for what happened to me). I know I can’t keep exploding like this forever so I just want to ask if anyone else has experienced this and what are their tips?
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ptsd
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So, I was riding my bike, when suddenly I had a flashback. It was the time when my dog Spanky, was rocking bark and fourth making this weird noise. It was so bad I had to stop riding my bike and go in.
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ptsd
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3 years ago, I watched my grandmother pass away. It was chaotic, people were running around, doctor doing cpr, my family crying. I watched as her heart rate and breathing subsided. We lost her.
3 years later, I still think about this in detail. I feel like, by now, I know I'll always be sad but I feel like shouldn't have SO much anxiety over this. Everyone loses someone.
I already have GAD and panic disorder. I'm having a hard time... I feel bashful bringing this up to my family or doctor...
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ptsd
|
I’m going on a road trip tomorrow till Tuesday and I have a lot of pre trip anxiety right now and it’s causing me to do a lot of compulsions and just the feeling of anxiety is not it
Can someone just honestly and truthfully tell me that everything I’m worrying about isn’t anything to be worried about and that everything will go perf
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OCD
|
I was at a college party last night with my class. I've been really shy and I had no friends when I moved in this city for school. We were giving prizes for people being good at something. Like, "the hardest working student", "the tech wizard" and then there was "the one who outdid themselves (doesn't translate well)". Well, I won that one.
I was basically praised most of the night and people were like "I remember how shy you were at first and now you you light up the room with your positivity and kindness" and "I don't know how you're able to get along with everyone so well" and the list goes on. Bullshit.
This positive person has severe depression, I'm a self-harming drug addict who wishes to die every other day and thinks about suicide once a week. That's posivity for you alright haha
I also know a few others that are like me. They always smile and are friendly but have all tried to kill themselves many times.
I guess I just find it interesting how good people are at faking it. It really goes to show that no one knows jack shit.
So, don't be a cunt to anyone, I suppose. You don't know anything either. I don't mean that in a mean way, but more like a "be careful" way lmao
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depression
|
Last year I was attacked multiple times by my own dog that I had for almost two years. This was very traumatizing to me and I've had difficulties being around large dogs ever since. Trauma is not easily healed, and after some research I found a therapy that I think will help me overcome this fear. Read more about Prolonged Exposure Therapy in this [article](https://www.facebook.com/samanthayateswriter/posts/144569693921923?__xts__[0]=68.ARDvNLUn5nGqX6BNtKuVLqMUlKPLtBwBfVl7s_qm1uz0RnEF79lda8KVdn5Z4a1n2QHC7mHJWdV_Vtcu7Nw0vQMa1bVkPeoCPlM8VujLmQJC59PMfIKS1R-vyBjqGBvH0WkQQYH-ARwxWnlU7JKn7dNfxRCB7j9-lTFTR8z6ZavzChDCfeQJpeulKIOOjBsj9331St4RquoM_oCH93QeJsGAvp0X7icppPbftDAeUuMaNY-HPqKV15NynTzIVoJf_UQk2PFC5p6IOVBcswMJIakrF2XK3aCgBEBM4UZHtAtpiVZMJgDruEC7hmENyj2SVc2z0XzL1_4N8urGZisa8H0&__tn__=-R) I wrote and see if it's something that can help you too.
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ptsd
|
Long story short, I (23F) was diagnosed with ADHD i a few months ago. I've tried Strattera and it helped a bit, until I got to 80mg and started having a really bad case of anxiety, panic attacks, and depression. I had to get off Strattera and stabilize with sertralin.
Finally, I was able to try Ritalin. I was honestly intimidated by it as I read about irritability, aggression, and mood swings, and I was generally not fond of the temporary effects with crashes. But I took 10mg for the first time today.
I was super nervous about taking it, but... I am not experiencing euphoria. I am not having any strong side effects. My mind is simply quiet(er) and I can pay attention to what I'm reading or doing for more than a few seconds. I feel calmer. I did not expect this, to be honest - it seemed too good to be true, but it is!!
Now I'm actually able to make considerable progress on the assignments of which deadlines I missed during the mental collapse I had!!! This all feels so surreal... It's reassuring me that I will be able to finish my MA degree more smoothly now (or so I hope!)
I do also try to exercise as much as I can, as I find it helps with my mood, anxiety, and focus, so I'm excited to finally see my efforts supported by medication that, for now, seems very promising.
TL;DR: Started Ritalin for the first time. Mind is clearer, I'm calmer, and I'm able to start catching up on missed deadlines!!!
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ADHD
|
I've always felt like i was a magnet towards strong feelings and like any aspie i had and still have weird obsessions. i don't know any other way to explain this but i'll explain it like this:
you know how people say movies and video games are getting to safe and repetitive and how every idea is butchered by the higher ups without a care for the source material. i was born in the early 2000s and what i grew up with was very original and still holds up today. i have had only a few movies and games where i truly thought the argument was true. but here's the thing, i can't tell if its my opinion or not. i feel and agree with what everyone says but i don't know if i truly feel about it or am just agreeing with the crowd.
if you don't know what i'm talking about then share some of your experiences with intense opinions and feelings.
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aspergers
|
My OCD brain literally will make up fake scenarios in my brain I know are not true like wtf. Lol. Or that I ruminate about and don't want to be true, but feel like it will defenitely happen. So my brain makes up far fetched scenarios that will never happen and currently not happening lol. I think my fluoxentine is helping but not as much as it could ugh.
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OCD
|
I’m undiagnosed, trying to see a psychiatrist so I can get assessed, which is SO difficult. In the meantime just trying to pinpoint all my symptoms and wondering if anyone else experiences this.
I come across as really socially awkward and I’m ashamed of it.
I was actually diagnosed with ASD as a kid (I don’t think I am, it doesn’t sit right with me). The thing is, I understand social cues perfectly fine. It’s trying to respond where I freeze up and look like I haven’t got a clue.
I could describe my brain as a set of cogs. When I’m not focusing on something, the cogs are turning at a hundred miles an hour. I have unlimited thoughts and ideas and I can’t stop thinking. It’s horrible when I’m trying to sleep, I can’t shut my brain up.
When someone is talking to me and I’m actively trying to listen to them, it’s like the cogs jam up. When it’s my turn to speak I have nothing to say. If someone asks me a question that requires thought, I have to pause for a long time. Sometimes I zone out and don’t even hear what they said in the first place.
I end up having to frantically reach into the junk drawer of my mind and work with whatever I happen to grab onto.
I’m always saying shit that is irrelevant to the conversation, or just downright weird, and then I immediately feel super embarrassed. I never manage to ask questions, so I end up talking way too much about myself even though I HATE talking about myself.
It’s not like I can’t give an appropriate response, but I can’t keep my focus on both listening and thinking at the same time. I literally can’t think before I speak.
I love being around other people but I can’t socialise for the life of me even though I really want to. It’s like I’m completely incapacitated. I can’t even crack a joke. I feel like a zombie.
I always pinned it down to social anxiety, but it feels like actually a focus thing.
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ADHD
|
I don’t even know how I got triggered. I just keep seeing him. And remembering. God fucking damnit I don’t wanna go through this again. Not again. I’m sorry
|
ptsd
|
I keep explaining to my teachers that I'm not in class because I'm having an emotional blowout. I don't know if this is just my perception, but I feel this cold distance from everyone except my GP. I'm struggling with all my might to hold things together, but I yell during phone calls, and my e-mails are too long. I feel like no one wants anything to do with me anymore. I feel like an abuser.
My GP asked me to take Prozac again after a year without it. I'm so ashamed of my melodrama and being unable to stop it that I'm physically sick to my stomach. I'm trying to journal all this out of my head, but its effects only last a few hours. I have a 3-4 month wait for mental health treatment and I feel helpless.
What can I actually, physically do that's not just theoretical thought magic?
(Edit: This episode was triggered by being retraumatized... I don't know if it matters.)
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ptsd
|
Seriously I couldn't imagine living into my 70's or 80's the thought of it makes me feel physically ill. People always say life is to short I say it only is if you actually enjoy this life I don't know how people can the shit hits the fan eventually. I really wish we had the choice of what age we wanted to die it would be as simple as pressing a button. For alot of us we are broken mentally or physically or even both. Life is just to damn long and the suffering is unbearable. I want to program my death in my near future sleep and end this prolong suffering. Life is chaotic and random and some of us can't be fixed we deserve a exit button.
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depression
|
so i was just literally vibing when my dog came and SNIFFED my private area, and then i worried i let him do it to get sexual gratification, i noticed i might be waiting a second or two before pushing him away from me. I should state that i dont feel attracted to him at all, i feel kinda violated when he does that, and that i cant seem to be sure about what i did before So here are my theories on it that i reached after thinking for a while:
1-i dont like, and i be just focused on something else and need a moment to realize whats happening
2-i wait for him to stop on his own as he might smell things sometimes once or twice then leave em on his own, and if he doesnt its when i push him away from me
3-maybe because it reminds me of my scent, which i like (we like how we smell, its something programmed into us)
4-i know he doesnt think its sexual, i know im not attracted to him, i know he just likes the scent and thats why i dont react strongly to it.
5-i let him do it because i know it makes him happy and doesnt give anyone sexual gratification and i just let him because i know he likes it until he touches me badly
6-i know its harming nobody and that he isnt doing something sexual from his POV (so im not abusing him sexually or exploiting him or anything) soi just let him then realize he shouldnt be sniffing my private area or soething
​
what do you think? is it an ocd pattern? do i have a serious problem? am i evil? was i abusing my dog sexually? or is it a stupid mistake and innocent and i shouldnt overthink it? im lost, but i will never let him sniff me again ever at all, and i should say that i love him to death as a friend and sometimes he feels like my son, so i dont think of him sexually at all and dont have any intention to harm him and NO animals cant consent so im not going to say that its his choice or something/
note: i had zoophilia theme with ocd before.
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OCD
|
I found this article that correlates ocd/ocpd to some of my money behaviors.
https://www.everydayhealth.com/news/are-you-sensibly-frugal-mentally-ill/
I have a hard time doing anything with cash except hoarding it. I keep more than a million in cash in my brokerage account.
There was a time in my life when I had to skip meals or go to people’s home for meals. There was a time when I had no money for a car, and then I remember I would run out of cash for gas for the clunker I bought after scrubbing toilets all Christmas.
Unfortunately I am now also surrounded by gold diggers and broke family. The very people who used to abuse me now want constant handouts and blackmail me constantly.
I don’t feel safe without a lot of money hoarded. I want to invest and trade, but I can’t spend it. I remember there was a time when I would not look at envelopes because I was phobic of overdue bills.
I still can’t open my mail, and let it clutter my house. It’s been years this way.
I will never be at peace or be free.
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OCD
|
Hi everyone! I have not been diagnosed with OCD, but I have a lot of the symptoms and have for a while without even realizing they could be due to OCD. I want to find a therapist, but I'm having trouble finding a therapist or psychologist that specializes in OCD that's covered by my insurance. Do any of you go to a therapist or psychologist that doesn't specialize in OCD and still find it helpful? Or should I continue to try to find a specialist? Thank you!
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OCD
|
Are these things closely linked? Or is OCD the foundation for paranoia, an excessive worry
Like I have OCD. But what if that OCD comes from the fear of things and it's a way of me trying to ensure safety?
|
OCD
|
My position was recently eliminated because my former employer isn't recovering well from the pandemic. I have about two more weeks left of severance. I managed to apply for unemployment, update my resume, and update my LinkedIn, but I'm unable to apply for jobs. Every time I start a job application, I panic. I'm paralyzed with fear, anxiety, and executive dysfunction. I'm so scared. I don't have a partner to fall back on; it's just me. I feel so alone and helpless. If you have any tips on how to work through this, I'd greatly appreciate them.
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ADHD
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I feel like I'm drowning. Everything is just piling on top of everything. I wish I knew what to do.
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depression
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Hey has anyone gone back onto a ssri after it working the first time then stop working? Citalopram saved me once and it stopped working after 6 years, its been about 5 years since i went off it and i'm tempted to try it again, is it worth it?? :)
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OCD
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Hey all! I don’t know if anyone else is familiar with this, but some days (like today), I’ll wake up feeling really foggy. I keep zoning out, and I feel unsettled (like I have butterflies in my stomach, and feeling like my heart is pounding).
All morning and afternoon, I’ve felt like I’m in a fog; I had class today and zoned out during my lectures. Nothing about today started off out of the ordinary; I woke up and took my meds per usual, had breakfast, slept at my usual time last night, etc.
I’ve tried things to get myself out of it, like drinking cold water, splash water on my face… but nothin seems to be working. How do I get out of this foggy feeling?
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ADHD
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I can't replicate audio mentally and I can only visualize parts of things. I have a decent amount of memory from my childhood. 13 onwards, it's a blur. My mother lacks any mental senses outside of a monologue(I also have one) and her memory of her life is better. 13 onward, I suffered from insane depression and later anxiety. I also have a very poor and limited diet and am looking at Vitamin B12 deficiency. I now forget things I played yesterday,my week,appointments etc. Is this related to poor visualization or depression,anxiety and vitamin deficiencies? I've noticed it's gotten worse as have my symptoms physically. My issue is what I defined as short term memory? Those things usually effect short term memory. Can it eventually lead into long term memory loss? I feel if it's SDAM, remembering more of my childhood wouldn't happen.
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depression
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