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| humor
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|---|---|
Huffpost hill - lame faithless electors don't even write-in 'presidenty mcpresidentface'
| false
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Nearly a dozen sharks found swimming in new york home's basement
| false
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British people must really like leia in the new star wars movie. stiff upper lip!
| true
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A tedious quest for the best way to deseed a pomegranate
| false
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Olympia cop who shot unarmed black men was justified, court finds
| false
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What do you call a woman who has a lot of sex? her name.
| true
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To the girl struggling with self-worth, you’re doing alright
| false
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Taking on port discovery in baltimore, md with toddlers
| false
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Woman accused of choking teen who blocked view of disney fireworks
| false
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What do you call the skunk who wears khaki's and goes to private school? preppy le pew
| true
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I've found that whenever god closes a door, satan hands me a lockpick.
| true
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Why couldn't the italian phone salesman open up his shop... he had a nokia
| true
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What did one alcoholic say to the other alcoholic? i forget
| true
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Katharina wulff's whimsical mysteries hit san francisco museum of modern art (photos)
| false
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Did you hear the one about the constipated mathematician? he worked it out with a pencil
| true
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How did the scuba-diver pay for his drinks? with barnacles (bar nickels)
| true
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Why did the mexican man push his wife off a cliff? tequila
| true
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Ted cruz says it would be 'nuts' to draft women
| false
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Britney spears wears couture to announce vegas residency, looks very un-vegas (photos)
| false
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Obama gave chance the rapper this career advice
| false
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Kid: mommy, mommy! can i lick the bowl? mom: no, you have to flush it like everyone else.
| true
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What kind of shoes does a pedophile wear? white vans. i'll be here all week.
| true
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Please don't cry seeing your tears makes me have to pee
| true
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I'm torn between having 'wish you were here' or 'look behind you' engraved on my headstone.
| true
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This dad built a ginormous 'star wars' playhouse even adults will love
| false
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Saw two bums in the street going at it with cardboxes boxes... pillow fight!
| true
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Why was twelve running from seven? because seven had a fucking rocket launcher!
| true
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Is that a human being in your pocket or are you just happy to see me?
| true
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Don't expect to see kim kardashian give birth on tv again
| false
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Nora ephron inspirational quotes: motivating words from the writer and director
| false
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Italy's top court slams amanda knox's murder conviction
| false
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Why don't jews live on jupiter? because its a gas planet!
| true
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You'd think a dude named captain crunch would have amazing abs.
| true
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God: make it cute with a lil mask angel: haha aw okay god: also make it eat trash
| true
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'moonlight' director barry jenkins drunkenly live-tweets 'notting hill'
| false
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Rules at impact: how to survive early grief
| false
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Trump's defense chief: we're not in iraq to seize anybody's oil
| false
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*decides to workout* *lays on ground to do sit-up* *find skittle on ground* *eats it* *takes nap*
| true
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Chris christie is over marco rubio's same old 25-second speech
| false
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I have kleptomania. but when it gets bad, i take something for it.
| true
|
John kasich goes off on ‘absurd’ arguments for him to drop out of presidential race
| false
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What goes up and never comes down? your age!
| true
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The holiday season is coming up. every year i make my parents something. i make them disappointed.
| true
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Where can a hand refuel its car? at a fist pump.
| true
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I just started my career as a shy rapist. it's touch and go.
| true
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What do coffee beans say to scare their friends? brew.
| true
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Quick: is this lana del rey or jennifer lawrence?
| false
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It's hard to argue with a spear i mean, it's got a point.
| true
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Not all trump hotels provide paid maternity leave, despite ivanka trump's claim
| false
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Did you guys hear about the kidnapping today? it's okay though, he woke up.
| true
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Why are women bad at parking? because they're consistently lied to about what 6 inches looks like.
| true
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If all of ireland sank, what part of it wouldn't? county cork
| true
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What's a jawa's favorite kind of pasta? rotini!
| true
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6 ways to reduce plastic waste this summer
| false
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What does a clock do when it's hungry? it goes back 4 seconds
| true
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So you guys heard about this myspace thing?
| true
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What do you say to a bodybuilder to get him to repeat you? no whey
| true
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Why do little people hate the taste of alcohol? because they can't reach the top shelf.
| true
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I'm wearing nike pants so you have to just do it...
| true
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Why do tomcats fight ? because they like raising a stink !
| true
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I like my women like i like my coffee.... black and full of semen.
| true
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Jake tapper: trump presidency once again eroding basic lines of human decency
| false
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Coping with the sleep disorders expected after the sandy hook shooting
| false
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Ugh, i am swamped at work today. *stares at puppies on the internet for 3 hours
| true
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I'm not sure if i'm depressed or just nihilistic
| true
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What grades did fidel castro get at school? full marx
| true
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How many feminists does it take to screw in a light bulb? that's not funny!
| true
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Yeah, i knew shakespeare in college. typical neck bard.
| true
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I wear a french maid's outfit specifically to get out of doing housework.
| true
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Doctor doctor my husband smells like fish poor sole!
| true
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How do bunny rabbits like their beer brewed? with lots of hops!
| true
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The quickest way to a man's heart is with chuck norris' fist.
| true
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11 no-fail ways to succeed in the new year
| false
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Gravity is just the earth being really clingy
| true
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Cooking off the cuff: an adriatic memory - baccalà mantecato
| false
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When a man speaks in the forest and there is no wife to hear... is he still wrong?
| true
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Describe your sex life in two words. my what?
| true
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Michael cohen reportedly paid $600,000 to advise at&t on time warner merger
| false
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Kinky = using a feather. perverted = using the whole chicken.
| true
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Hillary clinton, tea party candidate: a magic trick
| false
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I deleted all of the germans off my phone. its hans-free.
| true
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Holiday divorce advice: how to navigate your first holiday after divorce
| false
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Indians fireworks guy accidentally lets 'em fly after kansas city home run
| false
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What do you call nicky minaj's ass? silicone valley
| true
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Katy hayes to undergo double-arm transplant after losing limbs to flesh-eating bacteria (photos)
| false
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I wanted venison for dinner but my wife said it was a little deer.
| true
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World’s saddest elephant dies after 60 years alone in her cell
| false
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50 lessons that may make your life better (they did mine)
| false
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Disney actress louriza tronco of zapped tells us her audition story
| false
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Knock knock. who's there? lee lee who? no, lee hao.
| true
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Contrary to popular belief, plumbers are not good lovers they are emotionally draining...
| true
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San juan mayor pleads for help: 'we need water!'
| false
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Black jokes and mexican jokes are all the same if you know a juan, you know jemalle
| true
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These texas doctors prove that jews and muslims can achieve great things by working together
| false
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Q: why did the haunted house not like rain? a: because it dampened his spirits.
| true
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Cool things always happen when i don't have a camera.
| true
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Everyone's excited for the new minecraft movie. it's sure to be a real blockbuster
| true
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What do you call a waterfall that flows upwards? viagra falls!
| true
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Major earthquake strikes off southern coast of mexico, killing dozens
| false
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I can't hear what they're saying cuz i'm talking
| true
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