Input stringlengths 2 1.52k | Response stringlengths 2 2.76k |
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He went home to change for the big date. | God, isn't he great? |
God, isn't he great? | No, this is great. |
No, this is great. | Can I use the bathroom? |
Can I use the bathroom? | There's no light back there. |
There's no light back there. | Why aren't there any lights? |
Why aren't there any lights? | Well, there are, but for some reason they stop working at five-fourteen every night. |
Well, there are, but for some reason they stop working at five-fourteen every night. | You're kidding. |
You're kidding. | Nobody can figure it out. And the boss doesn't want to pay the electrician to fix it, because the electrician owes money to the video store. |
Nobody can figure it out. And the boss doesn't want to pay the electrician to fix it, because the electrician owes money to the video store. | Such a sordid state of affair. |
Such a sordid state of affair. | And I'm caught in the middle-torn between my loyalty for the boss, and my desire to piss with the light on. |
And I'm caught in the middle-torn between my loyalty for the boss, and my desire to piss with the light on. | I'll try to manage. |
You're just going to lock the store like that? | I want to talk to you about something, and I don't want to be disturbed. |
I want to talk to you about something, and I don't want to be disturbed. | You saw it? |
You saw it? | Very dramatic, I thought. |
Very dramatic, I thought. | It's not what you think. |
It's not what you think. | What, it's worse? You're pregnant with an Asian design major's child? |
What, it's worse? You're pregnant with an Asian design major's child? | I'm not pregnant. |
I'm not pregnant. | Were you going to tell me or just send me an invitation? |
Were you going to tell me or just send me an invitation? | I was going to tell you. But then we were getting along so well, I didn't want to mess it up. |
I was going to tell you. But then we were getting along so well, I didn't want to mess it up. | You could've broke it to me gently, you know; at least started by telling me you had a boyfriend. I told you I have a girlfriend. |
You could've broke it to me gently, you know; at least started by telling me you had a boyfriend. I told you I have a girlfriend. | I know, I'm sorry. But when we started talking... it's like I forgot I had a boyfriend. And then he proposed last month... |
I know, I'm sorry. But when we started talking... it's like I forgot I had a boyfriend. And then he proposed last month... | And you said yes? |
And you said yes? | Well... kind of, sort of? |
Well... kind of, sort of? | Is that what they teach you at that school of yours? Kind of, sort of? Everyone knows about this except me! Do you know how humiliating that is? |
Is that what they teach you at that school of yours? Kind of, sort of? Everyone knows about this except me! Do you know how humiliating that is? | I would've told you, and you would have stopped calling, like a baby. |
I would've told you, and you would have stopped calling, like a baby. | How do you know that? |
How do you know that? | Because I know you. You prefer drastic measures to rational ones. |
Because I know you. You prefer drastic measures to rational ones. | So you're really getting married? |
So you're really getting married? | No. |
No. | No, you're not really getting married? |
No, you're not really getting married? | The story goes like this: He proposed, and I told him I had to think about it, and he insisted I wear the ring anyway. Then my mother told the paper we were engaged. |
The story goes like this: He proposed, and I told him I had to think about it, and he insisted I wear the ring anyway. Then my mother told the paper we were engaged. | How like her. |
How like her. | Then my mother called me this morning and told me the announcement was in the paper. That's when I hopped the train to come back here, because I knew you'd be a wreck. |
Then my mother called me this morning and told me the announcement was in the paper. That's when I hopped the train to come back here, because I knew you'd be a wreck. | Thanks for the vote of confidence. |
Thanks for the vote of confidence. | Was I right? |
Was I right? | Wreck is a harsh term. Disturbed is more like it. Mildly disturbed even. |
Wreck is a harsh term. Disturbed is more like it. Mildly disturbed even. | I love a macho façade. It's such a turn-on. What smells like shoe polish? |
I love a macho façade. It's such a turn-on. What smells like shoe polish? | And you came here to what? To comfort me? |
And you came here to what? To comfort me? | The last thing I needed was for you to think I was hiding something from you. |
The last thing I needed was for you to think I was hiding something from you. | But you were. |
But you were. | No, I wasn't. Not really. I told you'd I'd been seeing other people. |
No, I wasn't. Not really. I told you'd I'd been seeing other people. | Yeah, but not seriously. Christ, you're ready to walk down the aisle- I'd say that constitutes something more than just seeing somebody. |
Yeah, but not seriously. Christ, you're ready to walk down the aisle- I'd say that constitutes something more than just seeing somebody. | I'm giving him his ring back. |
I'm giving him his ring back. | What? |
What? | I don't want to marry him. I don't want to get married now. I'm on the verge of graduation. I want to go to grad school after this. And then I want to start a career. I don't want to be a wife first, and then have to worry about when I'm going to fit in all of the other stuff. I've come way too far and studied too har... |
I don't want to marry him. I don't want to get married now. I'm on the verge of graduation. I want to go to grad school after this. And then I want to start a career. I don't want to be a wife first, and then have to worry about when I'm going to fit in all of the other stuff. I've come way too far and studied too har... | Sang? His name is a past tense? |
Sang? His name is a past tense? | Stop it. He's a nice guy. |
Stop it. He's a nice guy. | If he's so nice, why aren't you going to marry him? |
If he's so nice, why aren't you going to marry him? | I just told you. |
I just told you. | There's more, isn't there? |
There's more, isn't there? | Why, Mr. Hicks-whatever do you mean? |
Why, Mr. Hicks-whatever do you mean? | Tell me I don't have something to do with it. |
Tell me I don't have something to do with it. | You don't have anything to do with it. |
You don't have anything to do with it. | You lie. |
You lie. | Look how full of yourself you are. |
Look how full of yourself you are. | I just believe in giving credit where credit is due. And I believe that I'm the impetus behind your failure to wed. |
I just believe in giving credit where credit is due. And I believe that I'm the impetus behind your failure to wed. | If I'm so nuts about you, then why am I having sex with an Asian design major? |
If I'm so nuts about you, then why am I having sex with an Asian design major? | Jesus, you're caustic. |
Jesus, you're caustic. | I had to bring you down from that cloud you were floating on. When I say I don't want to get married, I mean just that. I don't want to marry anybody. Not for years. |
I had to bring you down from that cloud you were floating on. When I say I don't want to get married, I mean just that. I don't want to marry anybody. Not for years. | So who's asking? I don't want to marry you. |
So who's asking? I don't want to marry you. | Good. Stay in that frame of mind. |
Good. Stay in that frame of mind. | But can we date? |
But can we date? | I'm sure Sang and-Veronica?-would like that. |
I'm sure Sang and-Veronica?-would like that. | We could introduce them. They might hit it off. |
We could introduce them. They might hit it off. | You're serious. You want to date again. |
You're serious. You want to date again. | I would like to be your boyfriend, yes. |
I would like to be your boyfriend, yes. | It's just the shock of seeing me after three years. Believe me, you'll get over it. |
It's just the shock of seeing me after three years. Believe me, you'll get over it. | Give me a bit more credit. I think it's time we got back together, you know. I'm more mature, you're more mature, you're finishing college, I'm already in the job market... |
Give me a bit more credit. I think it's time we got back together, you know. I'm more mature, you're more mature, you're finishing college, I'm already in the job market... | You work in a market, all right. |
You work in a market, all right. | Cute. Tell me you wouldn't want to go out again. After all the talking we've been doing. |
Cute. Tell me you wouldn't want to go out again. After all the talking we've been doing. | The key word here is talk, Dante. I think the idea, the conception of us dating is more idyllic than what actually happens when we date. |
The key word here is talk, Dante. I think the idea, the conception of us dating is more idyllic than what actually happens when we date. | So... what? So we should just make pretend over the phone that we're dating? |
So... what? So we should just make pretend over the phone that we're dating? | I don't know. Maybe we should just see what happens. |
I don't know. Maybe we should just see what happens. | Let me take you out tonight. |
Let me take you out tonight. | You mean, on a date? |
You mean, on a date? | Yes. A real date. Dinner and a movie. |
Yes. A real date. Dinner and a movie. | The Dante Hicks Dinner and a Movie Date. I think I've been on that one before. |
The Dante Hicks Dinner and a Movie Date. I think I've been on that one before. | You have a better suggestion? |
You have a better suggestion? | How about the Caitlin Bree Walk on the Boardwalk, Then Get Naked Somewhere Kind of Private Date? |
How about the Caitlin Bree Walk on the Boardwalk, Then Get Naked Somewhere Kind of Private Date? | I hear that's a rather popular date. |
I hear that's a rather popular date. | Jerk. Here I am, throwing myself at you, succumbing to your wily charms, and you call me a slut, in so many words. |
Jerk. Here I am, throwing myself at you, succumbing to your wily charms, and you call me a slut, in so many words. | What about Sing? |
What about Sing? | Sang. |
Sang. | Sang. |
Sang. | He's not invited. |
He's not invited. | He's your fiancé. |
He's your fiancé. | I offer you my body and you offer me semantics? He's just a boyfriend, Dante, and in case you haven't gotten the drift of why I came all the way here from Ohio, I'm about to become single again. And yes-let me placate your ego-you are the inspiration for this bold and momentous decision, for which I'll probably be ost... |
I offer you my body and you offer me semantics? He's just a boyfriend, Dante, and in case you haven't gotten the drift of why I came all the way here from Ohio, I'm about to become single again. And yes-let me placate your ego-you are the inspiration for this bold and momentous decision, for which I'll probably be ost... | So what are you saying? |
So what are you saying? | You're such an asshole. |
You're such an asshole. | I'm just kidding. |
I'm just kidding. | I can already tell this isn't going to work. |
I can already tell this isn't going to work. | I'll ask Randal to close up for me when he gets back. |
I'll ask Randal to close up for me when he gets back. | Where'd he go? I'd have thought he'd be at your side, like an obedient lapdog. |
Where'd he go? I'd have thought he'd be at your side, like an obedient lapdog. | He went to rent a movie, but he hasn't gotten back yet. Ah, screw it; I'll just lock the store up and leave him a note. |
He went to rent a movie, but he hasn't gotten back yet. Ah, screw it; I'll just lock the store up and leave him a note. | You're too responsible. But no. I have to go home first. They don't even know I left school. And I should break the disengagement news to my mother, which is going to cause quite a row, considering she loves Sang. |
You're too responsible. But no. I have to go home first. They don't even know I left school. And I should break the disengagement news to my mother, which is going to cause quite a row, considering she loves Sang. | Who doesn't? |
Who doesn't? | Well, me I guess. So, I shall take my leave of you, but I will return in a little while, at which time-yes-I would love to go for dinner and a movie with you. |
Well, me I guess. So, I shall take my leave of you, but I will return in a little while, at which time-yes-I would love to go for dinner and a movie with you. | What happened to the walk and the nakedness? |
What happened to the walk and the nakedness? | I'm easy, but I'm not that easy. See you later, handsome. |
I'm serious. | We didn't just have sex in the bathroom? |
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