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did you at least scream loud enough for the whole building to hear? | yelled so loud the neighbor two floors up banged on the wall. cat just blinked at me like i was the crazy one |
you okay over there by the dessert table? | nah. this city just hums too loud for quiet. |
seeing anyone you know from home tonight? | not a single familiar face in this whole loud room. |
So what are you gonna do about that place now? | my mom actually sent me a photo from the realtor site before they painted it. that pale blue with the cracked shutters looked so sad but at least it was ours. now it's just beige and proper and looks like every other house on the block. |
Any plans to drive by again or just let it be? | maybe next time i'm in town i'll just drive past real slow like a creep. see if they kept the old tire swing in the backyard or if that's gone too. little stuff like that hits harder than you'd think. |
so wait, you came straight from work or something? | more like straight from surviving. haven't slept since friday. got a presentation in like twelve hours and i'm pretty sure my brain's just running on fumes and spite at this point. |
you look like you're about to pass out, dude. you good? | been mainlining coffee since dawn. got a monday morning thing i'm not ready for and i swear my notes stopped making sense about three cups ago. |
remember how you kept saying that interview felt too smooth, like a date where they're being way too nice? | yeah well smooth talkers don't call back do they |
didn't you mention they asked about that weird hobby of yours, the stamp collection thing? | lol guess my niche interests weren't niche enough for them |
what's the package that's got you looking like you just saw a ghost? | it's literally the limited edition vinyl i've been hunting for months. addressed to someone named marcus but sitting on my doorstep like it's for me. my brain just short-circuited. |
did something happen at the airport or are you just tired? | no no so the delivery notification popped up and it's that stupid expensive cookbook i've been eyeing. but the name on it is 'emma' and i am definitely not emma. feels like the universe screwing with me in the best way. |
wait they actually pulled it off in OT? | last second dude I can't breathe |
so the buzzer beater was real? | still shaking honestly can't feel my hands |
okay you're scaring me now, what's going on? | so there's this email from a lawyer and i don't even know what it's about and i keep running through all the stupid stuff i might have done like did i accidentally download something i shouldn't have or is it about that parking ticket i forgot to pay from three months ago or like did someone steal my identity and now i... |
bet you've already picked out backstories for all of them | oh absolutely it's like a reflex at this point. see the woman with the bright red scarf and the slightly frantic walk i've got her pegged as someone who just quit her job to paint murals full time and she's late to meet her dealer about a new batch of brushes. the guy slowly eating a sandwich alone with one earbud in h... |
you still remember that dumb inside joke from april? | uh yeah. the one about the raccoon and the spatula. |
wait you actually kept that note i wrote on the napkin? | still tucked in my backpack liner actually. |
you ever think about how quiet it gets up there when it's smooth? | nah it's the opposite — the quiet's what gets me. like waiting for the next jolt. |
does the shaking ever stop feeling personal? | n-not tonight it doesn't. every bump feels like the plane's got it out for me. |
you seem a little on edge tonight, everything okay? | just someone maybe walking the same way i was. probably nothing. |
that guy outside giving you a weird vibe or what? | yeah third time this week at the bus stop. i'm a grown adult. |
remember that time you waved at a stranger thinking it was me from like half a block away? | okay but that's nowhere near as bad as this. like at least you can just pretend you were waving at someone behind them or whatever. i literally called my boss 'mom' on a zoom call with like twelve people and you could see her eyebrows just shoot up. and i just froze. my brain short-circuited and i said it again but qui... |
you're still thinking about that thing from last week where you tripped over the curb? | that was a full second of shame. this was like a whole symphony of awkward. i'm sitting there trying to explain a project timeline and out of nowhere 'actually mom i mean—' and the silence that followed was so thick you could spread it on toast. someone actually muted their mic to laugh. i can still hear the tiny echo ... |
You're awful quiet — everything okay over there? | yeah no I just — wait, I think I just won a hundred bucks? |
What's with the face you're making right now? | just checked an old email and apparently I'm a lottery winner now |
wait your parents are celebrating what, like forty years? how're they doing it? | they're just going for a walk on the same trail they did on their first date, which is so them it hurts. like my mom packed the exact same sandwiches she made back then, apparently pb&j with the crust cut off because my dad was too nervous to eat properly and she thought easy food would help. and my dad's wearing this ... |
so they're really just out here hiking for their anniversary, no big dinner or anything? | nope just them and the sunrise and my mom keeps stopping to pick up cool rocks and show them to my dad like he hasn't seen the same limestone for thirty years. but he acts amazed every single time, 'oh wow honey that one's really sparkly' and she beams at him like he just discovered fire. i'm trailing behind them like ... |
remember that time you tripped over your own feet celebrating a goal? | yeah but this one actually counted |
did you just wake up the whole building with that scream? | totally worth the noise complaint though |
remember that time you insisted on standing for the whole morning meeting? | yep. that backfired spectacularly. |
didn't you say you were fine with just one coffee that day? | clearly lied to myself there. |
so how bad was the night really? | both of them puking at the exact same time man |
what broke you first? | the laundry pile honestly just stared at me |
what's going on in that head of yours at this hour? | okay so you know how the trail splits up ahead and one path goes through the meadow and the other hugs the ridge? and we always take the meadow because it's prettier but the ridge has this one view of the whole valley? i was thinking maybe that's like how we make decisions — we pick the pretty easy route and miss the t... |
are you having a moment with the sunrise or what | dude the light is doing this thing where it's hitting the mist off the creek and it's making everything look fake like someone turned up the saturation on the whole world. and i'm sitting here trying to remember if the word for that is 'ethereal' or if i'm just saying that because i heard it in a podcast once. probably... |
so you gonna frame that first stub or what | honestly it's almost embarrassing how good that number looks. like they actually paid me for the work I already did. |
bet you're already planning how to blow it all | maybe just one nice dinner and then the rest sits there making me smile every time I check my bank app. |
What's with the way you keep looking over your shoulder? | oh you know just the usual late night entertainment. was home alone last night and started hearing this scraping sound against the side of the house. like something being dragged along the siding. went out to check with the flashlight and it was just a branch from the old oak tree rubbing in the wind. but for a solid t... |
You seem a bit jumpy for a sunny afternoon — everything alright? | funny you should ask. been running that same noise through my head all day. last night there was this thumping like someone was testing the basement door from outside. not knocking more like a solid thud every few seconds. i sat there on the couch with the remote in one hand like it was a weapon. finally got up and pee... |
That song that's playing — you got a thing for it or what? | god no, not a thing for it exactly. it's just that every single middle school dance had that track on repeat, you know? like you'd be standing against the wall with your punch cup trying to look cool and it'd come on and everyone would sort of shuffle closer. hearing it now at two in the morning outside this place just... |
You hear something familiar in there or is it just me getting old? | oh it's not just you. that synth opening is basically my entire seventh grade year compressed into four beats. we'd all be lined up along the gym bleachers pretending we didn't care and then bam, that song hits and suddenly everyone's trying to slow dance without stepping on each other's sneakers. i swear i can still s... |
what'd he do this time, trip over his own feet? | barked at his own tail for like ten solid minutes |
is he out here living his best dumb life or what | tried to chase a leaf and got confused when it didn't move |
that guy in front just let the whole line wait while he dug for exact change. people like that ever get to you? | you know who else counts coins like that? my friend jill. she remembered i hate cilantro six months after i mentioned it. |
you just smiled at your phone. good news or just a dumb meme? | nah my best friend from portland just sent me a photo of the exact brand of tea i mentioned once last fall. |
so did that new job finally pay off or what | fifty bucks more than they said. like what. |
guess the big corporate gig is treating you well huh | they overpaid me and i'm not telling them. |
so how was the call this morning? still the same rhythm? | thirty seconds and she was too tired to finish a sentence. |
you always brace yourself for these, right? how'd it hit today? | like clockwork but somehow still catches me off guard. |
where are you right now exactly? | some subway platform. phone's at five percent. |
you gonna make it home alright? | honestly not sure. this area feels really off. |
you look like you just saw a ghost — what happened? | so — so we got mentioned in the washington post. like just now. i was literally in the middle of paying the driver and my phone just started going off and i saw the headline and i — i couldn't even speak for a second. had to tell the guy to hold on because i was just sitting there with my card out, frozen. it's this ti... |
what do you mean someone's following you? | thought it was my imagination at first, but last night I cut through the alley and heard footsteps speed up behind me—nearly gave myself a hernia laughing it off after |
hey you just got back from the trail, everything okay? you seem off | called my mom before i left. she barely had the breath to say hi. |
wait, didn't you say the nurse was hopeful last week? what changed? | nothing changed. just fewer words each time now. |
wait you're actually giving the toast today? how're you feeling? | hands are shaking man this is insane |
so it's happening soon huh? you good? | legit forgot how to breathe for a second |
wait was that why you kept looking back over your shoulder at the buffet line earlier? | yeah that's the thing — every time the bus drops me off i feel like i'm being watched all the way down the block and tonight it was just worse for some reason |
you were weirdly quiet during the cake cutting, everything okay? | honestly i'm pretty sure someone's been tailing me from the bus stop these last few days and my brain just couldn't shut up about it even with all the music and lights around |
so they still haven't found it? what did they say when you called this morning? | like three different people put me on hold and then someone said 'it's probably in frankfurt.' probably. my wedding shoes are just floating around germany apparently. |
did you actually scream at them or were you too tired? | didn't even have the energy for it honestly. just sat there on the kitchen floor with the phone and my head in my hands for a solid minute before i could say anything. |
didn't you say he moved to australia or something? | yeah that's what i thought. but there he was at the pump with a slurpee. i just stood there like an idiot holding my gas nozzle. |
wait wasn't he the one who always wore that ratty band hoodie? | same hoodie actually. faded to hell but still had the logo. i almost said something but my voice just kinda died in my throat. |
bet you're profiling everyone walking past again | oh totally — that guy's definitely smuggling exotic birds |
find any good airport conspiracies yet? | gate agent's part of a secret cabal, i'm sure of it |
so what's the plan if that noise gets closer? | probably just accept my fate honestly |
you gonna go check what that was? | absolutely not, nope, no way |
so what's got you on edge today, old friend? | you know that creaking sound an old house makes at night? yeah well i'm hearing that plus something that sounds like footsteps in the gravel and i'm literally sitting here in my childhood bed at noon like a kid again |
you sound a bit jumpy - everything alright over there? | oh it's nothing probably just the neighbor's cat again but i swear i heard what sounded like someone trying the back door handle and now i'm frozen in place with a fireplace poker like a total idiot |
so what's the plan after you finish that snack? | you know that song that played at every single middle school dance? just came on shuffle. now i'm standing here with a spoonful of peanut butter wondering where the last six years went. |
you gonna be okay heading to bed or what? | probably just sit with the stupid nostalgia for a bit longer. the song's already stuck in my head and i can practically smell the gym floor wax. |
remember that time you swore the song went 'holding out for a hero' but it was actually 'holding out for a hero' differently? | oh god the whole room heard that wrong note |
didn't you also blank on the second verse and just kinda hummed? | yeah that was the cherry on top honestly |
oh no, how much did they ding you for? | like eighty bucks for parking in a spot i've parked in a thousand times and there's no sign — like literally no sign, the pole is just empty, i took a picture because i knew nobody would believe me. and the meter maid must have been having a bad day because this ticket is handwritten and the handwriting looks like a do... |
wait, the one right outside the bar? i thought that was free after 10? | exactly, that's what i'm saying! i even checked the app and it said no payment needed after 9 but apparently there's some obscure city ordinance that overrides it on alternating tuesdays or whatever, and now i have to decide if i spend my weekend printing out google maps screenshots or just pay it and seethe quietly fo... |
What are you two planning for the big day? | oh just a quiet dinner in the back garden, nothing fancy. thought i'd dig out that old photo album from their honeymoon — might get a laugh out of mum when she sees the haircut dad had. |
How are you going to make it special for them? | found this little wooden birdhouse i'm gonna hang by the rose bush. dad's been talking about wanting one for ages, and mum'll pretend she thinks it's silly but i know she'll tear up. |
remember that time you tried to order a coffee and just blanked on your own name? | god don't remind me. that cashier had this look like he was waiting for me to short circuit. and then the way he said 'okay... so who's the coffee for' like I was a child drawing a blank on show and tell day. what even was that week anyway I think I'd slept three hours total and my brain was just buffering. you sitting... |
you ever notice how that one barista always gives you the side-eye like you owe them money? | oh absolutely. it's a whole performance every time. I walk in and she's already got that look like she knows I'm about to fumble the order or ask for something ridiculous. which fair play I did once ask for a matcha latte with extra vanilla and oat milk and she just stared. like I'd insulted her ancestors or something.... |
didn't you mention that bus stop has that flickering light you hate? | god the light yeah. that stupid light's been buzzing for like six months now and every night i'm standing under it waiting and it's just this constant reminder that nobody cares enough to fix anything around here. and now with this whole thing it's like the light becomes this ominous signal every time the bus pulls awa... |
remember you told me about the guy with the red backpack from a few weeks ago? | oh yeah the red backpack guy. that's the one. kept seeing him at the same stop and then he'd get off two stops later which is nothing weird on its own but it's the way he'd hover at the edge of the platform not looking at me but always in my peripheral like a headache you can't quite locate. and then yesterday he got o... |
Wait, did they really pull it off at the buzzer? | seventy-two years old and i nearly threw my back out jumping off the couch. that last shot felt like it hung in the air for an hour. |
So the game actually ended that way? | tell me about it. my heart's still pounding like i'm the one who hit the shot. for a second there i thought my hip would give out before the ball went in. |
wait, you said earlier someone got caught napping in the supply closet? | okay so it's not just any napping situation. it's marjorie from accounting, right, she's like fifty-something and always talks about her sleep schedule like it's a flex. so apparently she's been sneaking in there during her lunch break for weeks because her new meds knock her out. but here's the thing - she didn't know... |
didn't you mention something about a passive-aggressive note war happening? | oh my god yes, so it's been escalating for like a month now and it's the most satisfying thing i've witnessed in this building. someone keeps leaving sticky notes on the microwave saying 'please cover your food' in increasingly aggressive fonts, and then someone else started responding in tiny handwriting with things l... |
so did he just blurt it out or was it like a whole moment? | it was — ugh, okay so we're just sitting on this log near the water, right, and he's got this little stick he's been dragging through the sand making these weird squiggles. and out of nowhere he just looks up at me with those big eyes, no warning, and goes 'i love you, mama' like it's the most normal thing in the world... |
did you cry right there or did it hit you later? | oh i held it together for like maybe four seconds, just long enough to say 'i love you too, buddy' in a voice that absolutely cracked. then i had to turn my head and pretend i was watching a pelican because the tears were just coming. and then later, on the drive home, he fell asleep in his carseat with his mouth open ... |
what are you squinting at on your phone like it's a museum artifact? | old photos from a trip to greece ten years ago. don't judge the quality — that was back when phones took pictures that looked like you were shooting through a frosted window. anyway there's this one of me and anna at this tiny bar in nafplio, right, and i'm holding up a glass of something i'm pretty sure was ouzo and s... |
you've been scrolling for ages — what's so captivating on that little screen? | photos from that road trip we took through the southwest, must be ten years ago now. my ancient phone's holding on for dear life. there's one of us standing by this diner at like two in the morning, all neon and empty parking lot, and i'm making this face like i've just solved the universe's problems but i was probably... |
so did the landlord offer you a discount or what? | offered me a bucket actually. said it's 'temporary' and to just empty it into the sink every morning. the ceiling's still in my living room. |
bet the leak's fixed now though right? | fixed the leak yeah. ceiling's still a hole though. just a hole. been staring at it for three days now. feels like a metaphor. |
you sure that wasn't just the vending machine coffee finally kicking in? | nah d-dad, this was all me — forty-eight deadlifts and i didn't stop |
did you at least grunt loud enough to scare the morning janitor? | oh he heard it alright — dropped his mop and everything |
remember that time you tripped over your own feet trying to impress them at the party? | oh god yeah that was like three months in and i was still trying to be cool. landed flat on my face in front of the buffet table and they just stood there laughing not meanly but like really laughing you know the kind where their whole face lights up. and i remember thinking wow i'd eat shit every day if it got me that... |
didn't they fix that lamp you kept breaking by accident? | yeah the thrift store one with the weird crooked shade. they fixed it without even mentioning it just left it on the nightstand like it was nothing. and that's the thing right like i'm up here watching them breathe and i'm thinking about that lamp and how they never once made me feel clumsy about it just quietly made i... |
you look like you're running on espresso and spite — am I close? | pretty much, yeah. like my body's already filed for divorce from sleep and I'm just... negotiating the terms in the break room. |
did you even sleep last night or was it just a strategic blink? | strategic blink, for sure. woke up to my third alarm with my face on the keyboard and thought, well, this is how it ends. |
so what are you gonna do about it tomorrow? | god i don't even know. like part of me wants to just let it go because fighting it feels exhausting but then i think about her standing up there with my slides and my data and everyone clapping and my stomach just drops all over again. i mean i spent three weekends on that analysis and she literally just changed the fo... |
you remember that time you sent me a voice note about the airport being chaotic? | yeah and now look. every single piece of my wedding outfit is sitting in some random warehouse in dublin. the dress, the shoes, the veil my grandmother made. just gone. |
wasn't there something about you packing your suit in that vintage suitcase? | that's the one. my granddad's old case with the leather straps. they probably lost that too. like i'm supposed to just call a helpline and they'll fix it in forty-eight hours. |
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