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Wait, what happened? | Just... came home and she was gone. Left the key on the counter. That was it. Not even a text till three hours later. |
Hold on, what went down? | Said she needed space. But like, no reason. Just packed a bag and walked out while I was at work. Still got her toothbrush here. |
remember how you kept saying you were just 'keeping the seat warm' at that job? | yeah that aged real well didn't it. like I literally went in to grab my lunch and walked out with a whole new title. |
didn't you tell me last week you thought they'd forgotten your name existed? | oh absolutely. thought I was invisible over there and then bam they're handing me a corner office basically. |
wait didn't you say you'd ordered that weird ukulele book like three months ago | yeah the one with the tabs for old sea shanties. package just showed up with some rando's name on it but it's literally the exact thing. staring at it right now like a ghost just handed it to me |
remember when you almost bought that exact thing off some sketchy site | uhuh and now it's just sitting here on my desk in the library. label says 'for jenna m.' which is not even close to my name. feels like the universe pulled a weird prank on me |
so how was the big game then? | last second buzzer beater... still can't feel my voice |
you look like you're about to float away | seventy two years old and i'm still shaking |
so did anyone actually see your face when it happened or were you already committed to the bit? | oh the face was definitely seen because i had that split second where i thought i could play it cool and just keep walking like nothing happened except my shoe was still halfway on the dance floor and i had to hobble back for it while the flower girl pointed at me. the worst part is my mom recorded it and she's already... |
did you at least manage to save the cake slice you were carrying or was that a total loss too? | the cake slice actually landed face down on the floor which is almost poetic because that's exactly how my dignity went. my cousin's kid ran over and tried to eat it off the ground and i just stood there like some sort of failed waiter statue while the whole tent went quiet. my partner was laughing so hard they had to ... |
what are you going to do about it | keep going i guess. not like there's a backup parent. |
do you have any plan at all | plan is to stare at the ceiling for ten minutes then do it again tomorrow |
remember that time you spilled coffee on yourself trying to impress her at the diner? | oh that's rich bringing that up now. seventy-three years old standing there in a gas station in some random french town at eleven pm and there she is. still has that same laugh. couldn't even form words just stood there like a frozen idiot with a pack of gum in my hand. my wife's gonna kill me when i tell her. kept thi... |
didn't you once say she hated that brand of cigarettes? | you remember that huh. yeah she was always a marlboro girl and there she is buying some cheap local brand. i pointed it out like a total weirdo. said you downgraded and she goes inflation hits everyone. seventy years old and still quicker than me. we stood there for like twenty minutes talking about nothing. the weirde... |
wait you actually did that? like how did you even notice it happened? | was just scrolling through notifications and there it was. from like five years ago. that photo of us at the beach. god my thumb just slipped. |
did you like immediately undo it or just leave it there? | oh i panicked and liked another random post right after to try and bury it. which probably just made it way more obvious. classic me move. |
guess you wanted to make a dramatic entrance at my wedding, huh? | oh the floor definitely won that round |
tripped on the dance floor or did you just decide to bow? | yeah that was me meeting the linoleum up close |
still nothing from the doctor's office today? | n-nothing yet. you'd think they'd understand what the wait does to a person. spent the whole morning out here on the balcony just watching cars go by and thinking about all the things i never got around to doing. the azaleas need pruning, you know? and i keep telling myself it's probably nothing but then my brain goes ... |
you've been quiet all week — you eating okay? | not really, no. lunchtime came and went and i just stood here staring at the neighbor's cat like it had all the answers. food tastes like cardboard anyway when your stomach's tied up in knots. i keep replaying the doctor's face in my head from the biopsy — was there a pause? did his eyebrows do something? you start rea... |
did you get any sleep or were you up reading again? | oh it was wild — a talking cat in a tuxedo |
you look like you're still half in a dream, what happened? | dreamt my car turned into a giant toaster |
so you just watched her sleep for like an hour? | yeah and somehow it was the best hour of my life |
did you actually wake her up with the staring? | nope just sat there grinning like an idiot in the dark |
waking up on the bus again, huh? did you at least dream about something cooler than the hospital break room? | m-man, I dreamed I was still doing CPR on a mannequin. woke up and my arms were still sore. the bus lurching felt weirdly normal actually |
so you finally clocked out or did they have to pry the coffee cup out of your hand first? | pretty sure I left my badge in the fridge again. three twelve-hour shifts blend together when you stop remembering what day it is. the sky looks weird |
wait so you actually liked a photo from five years ago on your ex's profile? | yeah and the worst part is i don't even know why i was on their profile in the first place. like i was just scrolling mindlessly in the back of this uber and suddenly i'm staring at this picture of them at a house party from like 2019 and my thumb just slipped or something. now they probably think i'm sitting around re... |
did you at least manage to unlike it before they saw the notification? | oh i unliked it immediately but you know instagram still sends the notification anyway right. so now they know i saw it and liked it and then thought better of it. that's like ten times worse than just leaving it there. i'm honestly considering deleting the whole app and moving to a cabin in the woods where nobody can ... |
wait what happened with the recipe? | god it was the dumbest thing honestly. was trying to get that browning right on the onions the way he always did where they'd go all sweet and jammy and i stood there for like twenty minutes stirring and suddenly i could smell his kitchen. like the actual memory of sunday afternoons with the game on low in the backgrou... |
hold on you made what now? | the stew thing yeah the one with the wine that takes all afternoon. you know the one where he'd always say the secret was burning the garlic a little on purpose. i swear i burned it exactly the same way he did and the smoke alarm didn't even go off which is weird because it's usually so sensitive. maybe it knew. anyway... |
so did you ever figure out who that quiet guy from accounting actually is? | turns out he's got like half a million subscribers on youtube reviewing old synthesizers. i nearly dropped my tea when i saw the subscriber count, had to sit down and everything. |
wait, the one who always brings in those weird sandwiches? he's famous? | three million views on a video about repairing a 1980s drum machine. i've been sitting next to him for two years and he never once mentioned it. my brain short-circuited. |
what's with the frantic knock at 3am? | my cat just strolled in with a live snake |
is that a garden snake you're holding? | yeah mittens thinks she's a predator now apparently |
what are you gonna do about the library books? | oh he just... curled up on my notes. can't even be mad. |
should you call someone about that scratch on the floor? | nah. he was chasing his tail and b-bumped the shelf. too sweet to scold. |
Hey, you look like you're about to burst. What's going on in there? | got into that grad program I didn't even tell you I applied to. the one with the absurdly low acceptance rate. still feels like a prank. |
Wait, is that the email you were pacing about earlier? Good news? | yeah the universe decided to be nice for once. somehow convinced a committee of strangers I'm qualified. gonna have to celebrate by eating overpriced room service. |
so what's your next move after that? | probably just relocate to another continent |
any advice for handling that level of mortification? | new identity. new country. new life. |
wait what happened i missed it | last second of overtime, someone just threw it at the net and it went in. whole place went nuts and i'm standing there with a juice box like yeah okay. |
hold on you guys actually pulled that off? | yeah the buzzer went off and it was just chaos. kids were screaming, cake got knocked over. pretty sure i owe my voice to that one play. |
what are you even doing over there, you've been quiet for like twenty minutes | okay so hear me out — that guy in the orange vest who keeps walking past the same gate every seven minutes? definitely not airport staff. that's a spy doing pattern work. |
got any big plans when you finally board or just gonna stare at the wing the whole time | honestly i think the airline is running a social experiment on how many times you can hear 'final boarding call' before people actually move. i'm documenting it for science. |
remember that time you brought your own chair to my cookout because you thought we didn't have enough seating? | god the chair thing still haunts me sometimes. but this dinner party thing was worse honestly because it wasn't just me being extra it was me being wrong about a whole day. showed up with a bottle of wine all dressed like i was going to some fancy thing and they're just standing there in sweatpants with a frozen pizza.... |
you still cringe about the time you called that waitress by my name for like three straight minutes? | oh the waitress thing is bad but this dinner party thing is a whole different level of awful because there's no distraction. no menu to hide behind. just me standing there in a nice shirt holding a salad bowl while they're clearly mid-argument about something in the kitchen. tried to back out slowly like a cartoon char... |
so what's the latest with that new guy in accounting? you said he was up to something. | oh you won't believe this. so he's been acting all mysterious for weeks right? keeping his door closed on zoom calls whispering into his phone in the breakroom. turns out he's been secretly applying for a job with our biggest competitor and someone in HR accidentally forwarded his reference request to the whole company... |
anything interesting happen at the office today or same old same old? | well there's something but i gotta whisper it because the walls are thin here and i don't need the neighbors thinking i've lost it. you know debbie from payroll? the one who always brags about her perfect marriage. well she got caught in the breakroom having a very loud fight with someone on the phone and then she drop... |
hey you seem off today, everything okay? | not really no. old man went to sleep this morning and just didn't wake up. fourteen years of that little gremlin stealing my socks and snoring like a chainsaw and now the house is just quiet. the weirdest part is i keep hearing his nails on the floor. like my brain is still running the background track of him. i sat on... |
you look like you haven't slept, what's going on? | yeah sleep wasn't really happening. my dog passed this morning. fourteen years of him being the only consistent thing in my life and now i'm just sitting here on this call trying to pretend i'm fine. the vet said it was peaceful but i wasn't even in the room because i thought he'd wake up like he always does. stupidest... |
hold up what | dude at table three is definitely narrating |
you look like you won something — what happened? | typed the last word on my novel. finally. |
no way, what happened exactly? | so get this — i'm out back watching the stars because it's the only time it's quiet around here and i get this notification from work and i almost ignored it because who checks email at eleven pm right? but something made me open it and it's from the vp of all people and she's like 'we've been impressed with your initi... |
remember that time you showed up an hour early to the movies and just sat in the parking lot waiting? | god yeah that was nothing compared to this though. like at least then I could just sit in the car and scroll my phone like a normal person. but showing up a full calendar day early to a dinner party at your place? that's a whole different level of mortifying. I had the bottle of wine in my hand and everything, was lite... |
was that the same weekend you accidentally called me by my brother's name? | oh don't even bring that up, that's a whole other layer of embarrassment I'm still not over. but the dinner party thing was worse because at least the name thing was just a stupid slip in a quiet moment between us. this was a full public performance of me being an absolute disaster. I stood there in the hallway for lik... |
wait what happened — you looked like you saw a ghost over there | found that shoebox of letters from jenna under the spare tire. she used to fold every envelope into these tiny origami shapes. can't even remember the last time we talked. |
whoa, what's with the face — you okay? | digging through the trunk and bam — letters from my old friend carter. he'd always doodle little cartoons in the margins. fifteen years gone and i still remember his handwriting. |
you ever wonder if your phone knows you're drunk right now or is that just me | dude my phone's definitely judging me. it keeps suggesting late night taco bell and i haven't eaten tacos since like 2019. what's that about |
so you're telling me the universe has a plan and it involves me buying three bags of chips at 1am | that's exactly what i'm saying. the universe is just a giant vending machine and we're all out here pressing buttons hoping for something good. chips are definitely part of the plan |
you look like you're running on fumes — what's going on? | both kids got sick and the laundry's a literal mountain now |
rough night? you seem kinda out of it | two fevers and a pile of towels that's basically self-aware |
remember you said you'd tell me about that interview the second you knew? | yeah well turns out they went with someone 'more aligned with their current vision' — which is corporate speak for twenty years younger and half my salary. sat in the parking lot watching my phone battery drain thinking that was gonna be my second act. |
you mentioned you'd picked out a spot for your desk at that company. where was it again? | corner office on the ninth floor with a window that faced the river. stupid thing is i actually believed i'd be looking out at it tomorrow morning. now i'm just sitting here in my car watching the taillights blur. |
you actually checked the ticket or just letting it sit there? | still sitting in my jacket pocket. feels fake. |
what're you gonna do with it anyway? | maybe pay the electric bill. maybe not. |
wait, you called them? | yeah, my dad picked up and i just lost it for a second |
hold on, what happened? | nothing big, just the way they were laughing together this morning |
so wait you actually went through with that? like you didn't even realize until after? | no like i was just scrolling half asleep at the laundromat and my thumb just did its own thing you know. didn't even register until i saw the notification pop up and my stomach just dropped. five years ago this photo pops up and i'm just sitting there watching the spin cycle like maybe if i stare hard enough i'll disso... |
did they say anything about it or are you just spiraling in silence right now? | oh i'm absolutely spiraling in silence but that's my default state honestly. they didn't say a word which somehow makes it worse because now i'm imagining them seeing the notification and just side-eyeing their phone like what is this person doing. and the worst part is i can't even undo it you know there's no take-bac... |
wait are you seriously jumping at every little noise out there or what | tree branch just scraped the window and i nearly climbed the walls. definitely not my most dignified moment |
you gonna call the cops or just lie there staring at the ceiling fan | heard something that sounded like footsteps on the porch and now i'm just frozen. fan's the only thing keeping me company |
What's got you all quiet all of a sudden? You look like you've seen a ghost. | found an old voicemail from my aunt on my phone. she's been gone ten years now, and her voice just... caught me off guard. weird time for it to pop up, yeah? |
You just froze up there for a second — everything okay? | noticed a message from ages ago. my uncle left a voice note the night before he passed. never heard it before now, and his laugh just hit different at two in the morning. |
wait, you're still at the café? | nah, bus now. street musician just played wonderwall. bad. |
so you just sat there the whole time? | mostly. counted six pigeons fight over a croissant. riveting stuff. |
what's got you grinning like that? | she just looked at me and said 'more juice please' clear as day |
you look like you're about to cry happy tears | full sentence from the little one. i'm not okay in the best way |
you're still awake? what's going on? | last deadline broke me and now i'm eating cereal with a fork |
so what's the game plan now? you just gonna mope around or actually do something? | honestly the game plan is staring at this ceiling tile that's been cracked since september and wondering if i should fix it or just let it match the rest of my life right now. like what do you even do when someone just goes 'hey not feeling it' and vanishes. no fight no explanation just poof. i keep replaying every sin... |
what are you thinking about doing next? like today i mean, not the big picture stuff | today's plan is basically just existing in a fog and hoping my body autopilots to class. i mean i could try eating something but the fridge looks like a crime scene of leftover takeout and half a jar of pickles. maybe i'll call my mom and pretend everything's fine until she asks about the ex and i have to fake a cough ... |
wait, you actually remembered I said that? | you mentioned that weird avocado trick back in april, and it's honestly been the only way i've eaten them since. crazy the stuff that sticks. |
oh yeah? like what kind of detail could you possibly still hold onto? | that time you said you hated the sound of people chewing apples. every single time i bite into one now i think of you and try to be quieter about it. |
hold on what'd they do | full sentence. 'i want the blue cup' like it was nothing |
so how'd the dinner date thing end up going last night? | okay so the first one comes out and it's not even close to what i ordered right, like linguine with clams versus a bolognese, totally different universe. i send it back nicely, no big deal, waiter's all apologetic. then the second plate shows up and i'm looking at it and it's the same exact wrong dish but this time wit... |
wait did you ever get to eat anything or were you just hangry the whole time? | oh no i ate but it was like a moral defeat at that point. the manager came over finally after i made eye contact with him across the room and gave him that look you know the one that says come fix your life. and he just goes oh yeah the printer in the kitchen is jammed so they've been guessing orders for like forty fiv... |
so she's actually going through with it then? | yeah next friday she's just gone. like I get it I do better job better life all that but we've been doing the every-sunday-pancake thing for six years and now I'm gonna be standing at the stove flipping one sad pancake for myself. tried to be chill about it at dinner last week and my fork just stopped halfway to my mou... |
have you guys talked about what happens after she leaves? | she keeps saying we'll video call every week like that's the same as yelling across the couch at two in the morning. I don't know maybe I'm being dramatic but every time I walk past her old hoodie still hanging on my closet door I just stand there for a second. my mom keeps asking if I've packed my suitcase for my own ... |
so the whole room saw you go down? | right in front of the cake table. flower arrangement went flying. seventy-two years old and still finding new ways to make a fool of myself. |
did anyone help you up or what happened next? | nephew grabbed my elbow. kept asking if i was okay. wanted the floor to open up. got a standing ovation when i finally stood. |
you sure you're alright sitting there with that card in your hand? | oh this thing? feels like holding a live grenade with the pin half pulled. everyone keeps telling me just speak from the heart but my heart's currently doing that thing where it forgets how to beat properly and my hands are shaking so bad i'll probably drop the microphone into the cake. worst part is i've known the gro... |
you look like you're rehearsing under your breath again, what's going on? | trying to remember if i'm supposed to toast before or after the bouquet toss and now i'm spiraling about whether i even know what a bouquet toss looks like anymore. my daughter told me to just wing it but last time i winged something i accidentally congratulated a woman on her pregnancy and she wasn't pregnant so you s... |
so you went full real estate stalker mode, huh? | peach. it's peach now. like a sad little creamsicle. |
did you at least knock and ask for a tour? | no, just sat there till the streetlights came on. |
you still remember that time you dropped your coffee in the library and i ran over with napkins? | god yeah that feels like forever ago. you know what's wild — i keep thinking about that moment like it was some kind of sign or something. three months ago i was just the person who could barely hold a cup steady and now they're handing me a title i didn't even ask for. my manager called me into the office this morning... |
remember when we first met and you told me you thought your job was just something that paid bills? | oh man i said that didn't i. and i meant it too — it really was just a thing i did to afford rent and the occasional burrito. but now i'm sitting here on this bench with the evening light doing that thing where everything looks golden and i can't wrap my head around it. they gave me an office. an actual door that close... |
so you're telling me the universe just decided pancakes at 3am was the meaning of life? | like okay hear me out — the syrup soaking in, that's like proof everything connects eventually. or i'm just really hungry. |
did you just figure out time is fake or are you gonna share your hashbrowns? | time's definitely fake but these hashbrowns are real. like what if the whole point of being alive is just moments that taste this good. |
you look like you're about to start chewing your own keyboard, that bad huh? | third one this week and i don't even know what day it is anymore. like yesterday i walked into the kitchen to get coffee and just stood there for five minutes staring at the cabinet because i forgot what i was doing. my brain is basically a screensaver now. and the thing is the deadline keeps moving so there's no finis... |
did you finally snap and throw something or are we still in the simmering phase? | oh we passed simmering around hour thirty-two when the coffee maker started beeping at me and i genuinely considered just crying into it. not even sad crying just like. pressure release crying. you know when your eyes do the thing without your permission. now i'm just floating through this call running on spite and som... |
wait, you never told me how the whole printer thing ended? | oh m-my god, she actually cried |
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