id int64 1 7.31M | subreddit stringclasses 108
values | comment stringlengths 1 10k ⌀ |
|---|---|---|
7,312,301 | mommit | Ugh, I have a 2 month old and usually just sleep with a towel over my chest. It just feels gross, all-around. |
7,312,302 | mommit | Any tips on how to drop night deeds? |
7,312,303 | mommit | Idk what I’m doing |
7,312,304 | mommit | Thank you so much, this is some great advice!! |
7,312,305 | mommit | Thank you! I will try not letting her sleep as much during the day and see if that helps |
7,312,306 | mommit | Mine slept for more then 3 hours for the first time when he was 18 months. Then in a week or two he started sleeping from 8pm to 5 am. I had lost all hope too. Hang in there, its coming. |
7,312,307 | mommit | Yeah I would hate waking up soaked. Eventually my breasts adjusted and it wasn't too bad, but the first couple months are the worse. |
7,312,308 | mommit | Haha same. This is my second attempt. The first one didn't go well because I was too exhausted to stick with it. It's only working now because my husband is working from home so I can hand LO off to him in the morning and go back to bed. I recommend reading "Solve Your Child's Sleep Problems" by Richard Ferber. It's ... |
7,312,309 | mommit | I need this. Almost 9 month old still wakes up twice a night. I feel like I’m never going to sleep again for more that 3-4 hours at a time |
7,312,310 | mommit | Thankyou! I appreciate it |
7,312,311 | mommit | My advice - try to communicate via texts. It’s great to have conversations in writing. My hubby had 4 years of texts saved. Showed every lie, every threat. Also showed that they came from one direction. |
7,312,312 | mommit | If you can, put that you request a copy of his W-2 every year in case child support needs to be adjusted later in your divorce papers. My mom missed out because she was too soft, asked my dad to up it from $400 a month for two kids to $650 so she wouldn’t have to work a second job (he was doing all sorts of shit and l... |
7,312,313 | mommit | I'm so sorry you're going through this right now. He seems resolute on his decision and as much as it may hurt, you are better off this happening now rather than later. Focus on your school, your baba and your income. Make a commitment to yourself to make something of yourself and to be the best parent you can be. Late... |
7,312,314 | mommit | I’m so sorry. Who abandons their family like that? I get relationships don’t always work out but to do this with the first year of having a baby? You’re going to get through this. You’re going to be so much stronger bc of it. Get your lawyer NOW if you don’t have one. |
7,312,315 | mommit | Is he with someone else? Sounds strange |
7,312,316 | mommit | If I was a betting woman I would put money on him trying to get back together. Don’t fall for it, remember how you feel now. These types always think the grass is greener elsewhere and then eventually realize how good they had it. |
7,312,317 | mommit | Well it’s better he showed you what a selfish prick he is now, than have you wait another 4.5 years. The sad thing is he’s too self absorbed to work on a relationship for his own kid. And get to see his baby on his terms? I hope he realizes that’s not how it works. He walked out. |
7,312,318 | mommit | Honey, let the trash take itself out. File for child support. And get a good divorce lawyer it possible. He’s clearly one of those that think his life hasnt changer and he should have no responsibility. Keep fighting for your education. He cannot fully get out of providing for your child. And tbh live happily with ou... |
7,312,319 | mommit | Fuck him. Sounds like he’s comparing his life to someone else’s and has decided you’re the reason he can’t have “fun” like he used to. Get his ass on child support like yesterday. Oh he wants to spend money? Shit. Let him spend it on dealing with the consequences of his childish selfish actions. |
7,312,320 | mommit | It’s definitely not you it’s him. He wants to be a party boy. |
7,312,321 | mommit | Prepare yourself mentally to find out he’s been cheating on you. |
7,312,322 | mommit | Tell your parents. You dont have to wait for him to make the first move. Hes already abandoned you. Get a divorce lawyer. Don't be "nice" in what you ask for. Put yourself and your child first. |
7,312,323 | mommit | Ugh, I'm so sorry. Consider it a blessing in disguise. He's showing his true colors! I basically raised my son by myself (with help from my parents, thank goodness!) until my now-husband came into the picture when my son was 7. My son is now in high school and we have a very tight bond. I feel like it worked it just th... |
7,312,324 | mommit | This is basically what my dad did to my mom when my sister was a few months old and I was a toddler. It was a rough couple years afterwards while custody got figured out (if you can, please shield your kid from having to see the two of you at each other’s throats if it gets ugly). That said, they ended up being pretty ... |
7,312,325 | mommit | My husband has done the same but hasn’t left yet (still living together) we have a 5yo and 4mo old. I don’t recommend staying if you can get him away from you. I financially can’t leave until four years from now and honestly it’s so hard emotionally to stay stable constantly. Don’t contact him if he doesn’t contact you... |
7,312,326 | mommit | When you've graduated school and become a success, built the life you and your baby deserve, he'll likely try to weasel back in. Don't let him. He made his choices and showed you his true character. |
7,312,327 | mommit | Lawyer up. ASAP. I’m so sorry this is happening. He’s not the man you thought he was. My guess is that marriage and fatherhood are harder than he expected and he wants to run away from it all. He’s too immature to face up to the fact that he took on a challenge he couldn’t live up to so he’s blaming you. Your time to g... |
7,312,328 | mommit | Ive noticed with breakups, the women have a harder time in the beginning and the men live it up but after a couple months, the woman is better off and happier for the breakup. Sending love to you |
7,312,329 | mommit | I'm so sorry that is happening. Some couples do end up being fantastic co-parents despite having really challenging romantic history. My stepsons mom was quite the pill I guess when he was a baby (always going out drinking and doing coke etc) but now she is a wonderful mom and a lifeline to us. She is very close with m... |
7,312,330 | mommit | I’d consult with the three best lawyers in town tomorrow and hit him with temporary orders before he can serve you. |
7,312,331 | mommit | He left before you got your degree?! Good! Now he can pay you support until you finish and he gets zero advantage from your hard work in school. I’m so sorry This came out of nowhere. Stuff like this happens, but it’s really unfair that he did it the way he did. |
7,312,332 | mommit | I’m sorry you’re going through with this but I’d try to get my name off the car if I were you, If he won’t let that happen you should lawyer up. You won’t be able to abandon your responsibilities, unfortunately it sounds like you and your parents are going to be the only stability for your child. I’m so sorry you’re go... |
7,312,333 | mommit | I am sorry. It sounds like he has no interest in saving the marriage. You can ask for child support based on income and parenting time and temp spousal support. I would also factor in any child care expenses if you have any. as far as the car payment, tell him if he wants it he has to refinance in his name asap....if ... |
7,312,334 | mommit | He should be paying the car . Its not your fault that he wants to be bachelor again. |
7,312,335 | mommit | I’m sorry. You sound courageous. How does a parent just walk out like that? Childcare is a planned negotiation. |
7,312,336 | mommit | It sucks that you guys are this far into a relationship when he suddenly realizes this. I was lucky once, and I saw the signs. I walked away when I heard those words. It was hard because I loved him. Now, on the other side of things, I see how incredibly lucky I was to hear those words. He would never be a good fat... |
7,312,337 | mommit | Yes, he needs to pay child support and also pay for child care! He needs to split this duty. He can't just think, Oh, I don't live with my kid anymore, so I will just go party... no! He needs to be held accountable! If you don't mind, did he give you a reason why he is leaving? He sounds like an immature @$$ %@... |
7,312,338 | mommit | Sending all the best your way. Do the best that you can I’m sure karma will come his way |
7,312,339 | mommit | If you can, also go for alimony. I am so sorry this is happening to you! Best of luck!!! |
7,312,340 | mommit | Have every conversation in text or email and save them for your lawyer. Take his ass to court for child support/alimony. Shit’s going to be a difficult adjustment, lean on your support system. But I promise you, you’ll look back on this and be so happy to be rid of that useless man. It’s hard to have any independence w... |
7,312,341 | mommit | Document everything. Screenshot texts and save emails, put everything into a special folder and save copies. Start consulting a divorce lawyer now. Hit the prick for everything he's got - childcare, alimony, any shared items. Hit him where it hurts |
7,312,342 | mommit | Everyone’s already given great advice, I just wanted to say that youve got this! You sound like a great mom, your baby is so lucky to have you. |
7,312,343 | mommit | I'm so sorry you're going through this. But I can tell you from experience, you'll be okay. My ex husband left me 7 months pregnant and with a 2 year old 10 months ago. I lost my home and just about everything except my children. But I am in a much better place now, have found myself again, found hobbies and a life a... |
7,312,344 | mommit | Sounds a lot like what I'm going through, my husband just went to a 4-day festival came back and looked for any reason to pick a fight, now we're just trying to be civil for the kids but trying to arrange for a divorce. That's all dropped yesterday. I'm really sorry this is happening to you and it really sucks when th... |
7,312,345 | mommit | It just sounds like he wants to do his own thing and not be a grown up and take care of a child. He wants to live out his fantasy of having freedom and no responsibilities He will love it for a while, think he is living the best life. But he is just a man child who lost something great. Let him live that sad life. Yo... |
7,312,346 | mommit | That is awful. I am so sorry you are going through this. As a recent father of a 2 and 1 year old, I could never imagine ever leaving my spouse; no matter how hard it gets. |
7,312,347 | mommit | I’m so sorry your going through this. I know it sucks. Make sure you have a support system for yourself. I promise you’ll get through it. I never understood why men just walk away, live life and be care free. I just don’t know.. |
7,312,348 | mommit | What a dick |
7,312,349 | mommit | It sounds like he just wants to run off and be a kid again. Maybe it doesn’t have anything to do with you, just your life together and having a baby. Either way it still sucks and I’m sorry. Get that child support girl |
7,312,350 | mommit | Better now than later. I had to deal with all this rubbish when my LO was older so she was roped into everything as well. Text only to keep records and focus on what's important. Wishing you the best |
7,312,351 | mommit | Child support, alimony (maintenance), and half his 401k. There's a lot more than child support that you can be entitled to. Get yourself a good divorce lawyer. |
7,312,352 | mommit | You might be able to get a year or two of alimony as well, worth looking into |
7,312,353 | mommit | Go him for every cent you can get. Make the mongrel pay. |
7,312,354 | mommit | Go interview the best divorce attorneys in town, just so he can't use them. |
7,312,355 | mommit | I’m very sorry. It sounds like you are doing all of the right things to handle this shocker of a situation. Please get all the support you can lined up now because often in these cases, there is someone else involved and it would be wise to prepare yourself mentally and emotionally if that comes out. I hope not. |
7,312,356 | mommit | Thats financial abuse you should stop paying half for the car. Sounds like a real jerk. |
7,312,357 | mommit | I’m sorry to say but from my experience I think he is cheating having an emotional affair. Same scenario happened to me my husband was talking to a coworker about our marriage problems and she convinced him to leave me. That was in 2019. We are still married with a baby now in 2022. That was hard. |
7,312,358 | mommit | Also this is emotional abandonment. I’m so sorry you are going through this. |
7,312,359 | mommit | Wow. What a turd. I’d think it if came out of nowhere then it could be PPD for him. He’s looking to escape. But you can’t help someone who doesn’t want to help themselves. Parenting is so hard especially the first couple of years, everyone is exhausted and sleep deprived and life is just. So. Different. Still to ... |
7,312,360 | mommit | Sounds like my ex-husband. Unlike yours he was willing to go to couples therapy, but it turned out that was just for show so people didn't accuse him of leaving without trying. When we had a breakthrough at the therapist that could have really helped things, he quit therapy, moved out, and had a girlfriend within a wee... |
7,312,361 | mommit | Why on earth would you give him money? He leaves and sends you money. That's how it works Honestly, why are men? |
7,312,362 | mommit | First, I’m so sorry this happened to you. But let him go. The heartbreak is like nothing you’ve ever felt before or will feel again, but you’ll be so much happier without him and you’ll find someone who will love you and appreciate you for who you are. Just my advice, I wouldn’t be purposely malicious. Don’t let your ... |
7,312,363 | mommit | I'm so sorry you're experiencing this. I agree with you....its inherently selfish of him to leave you as a single mom just so he can be a child and not own up to his responsibilities. This is absolutely going to help you in the long run. Someone commented to communicate only via text with him. I completely agree. D... |
7,312,364 | mommit | I hate to tell you this but someone has to be the grown up and sweetie, it’s you. It’s not what you want to hear. You expected a partner and you found out he’s a selfish knob instead who is running the first time he is faced with the responsibilities of his actions. This is your wake up call. You fell in love with his ... |
7,312,365 | mommit | I’m so sorry you’re going through this. I hope things get easier for you to navigate through this as time goes on. You’re incredibly strong and you can do this. And get every cent you can out of that mf. |
7,312,366 | mommit | Yeah I'm making sure to document. I'm handing him the keys to the car and I'm telling him I'm not giving him a dime. Can't wait to see how upset he gets |
7,312,367 | mommit | I love it when Narcissists shoot themselves in the foot. |
7,312,368 | mommit | Emails. Emails are hard to dispute in court. Texts can be thrown out. |
7,312,369 | mommit | She can still go after him for more tbh. |
7,312,370 | mommit | I have this sense of empowerment now. I look at my child and I think to myself, "I will get through this. I have to because no one else is going to step up." You're right: better now than later. I just have a hard time of wrapping my mind around how we were together a total of 4.5 years, but in a span of a few months,... |
7,312,371 | mommit | He's just walking away after being together for 4.5 years. The only sensible thing he's doing is he still wants to see our child, but right now hes giving vibes that it has to be on his terms. Don't worry, I'm leaving him with the car and all the payments, setting up a temporary custody order, and getting child suppor... |
7,312,372 | mommit | I know, who does this in the first year? So so selfish! |
7,312,373 | mommit | No he's not. I sat him down and I told him we need to be 100% honest to prevent unnecessary hurt. He said there's no one else, and I believe him. |
7,312,374 | mommit | This was actually my first thought as well. As soon as he sees how much time he has to give up when he has the kid on his days, and how much money he’ll end up paying her in child support, I’m betting he changes his tune and begs for her to work things out with him. It’d all be a lie though… he’s already made it clear ... |
7,312,375 | mommit | He keeps saying he's doing what's best for the child. He's saying that two good homes are better than one crap home. He's right, but there's no way it was so bad that it was damaging our child. Our child is so happy and friendly and securely attached. Plus, if he was that concerned, he would've taken the kid with him... |
7,312,376 | mommit | That was my thought. What a cliche. |
7,312,377 | mommit | I hope for this so much. I'm definitely taking a long break from relationships and just focusing on the two of us |
7,312,378 | mommit | That sounds so hard. My ex lived in our basement while I was pregnant and terrified of being alone, and it was emotionally exhausting. Sending you strength |
7,312,379 | mommit | That's honestly what it is. He's immature and didn't realize what a big responsibility being married and having a kid is. He even said "sometimes I feel like I wasn't cut out to be a dad." |
7,312,380 | mommit | No I completely understand not ruining the parent-child relationship. He just seems to have this idea that it's going to be easy breaking things off and that I'm just going to continue giving him money while I'm the primary parent. |
7,312,381 | mommit | Lawyer up no matter what! |
7,312,382 | mommit | I think she should contact a lawyer before making legal changes on property ownership or giving him any money. That should be the priority |
7,312,383 | mommit | That is how it should be. My DH was completely uninterested in fatherhood when our oldest was born. He was there a few days took photos and then took off. He traveled to 12 different states and was hardly home, leaving me home alone with many pets (most of them being his dogs) and a newborn. When he was home he was agi... |
7,312,384 | mommit | Good idea!!!! |
7,312,385 | mommit | **I. LOVE. THIS.** Everything in there is so valid & important & well thought of. The most important piece of advice is Go To The Courts!! Even if you’re coparenting well, & things seem to look great & you’re getting along, etc etc, still get it in writing & have it planned out & filed with the courts. I’ve seen so m... |
7,312,386 | mommit | if you're in a state where you can record without the other party knowing to do so, you never know what he may say or threaten you with |
7,312,387 | mommit | Is the car loan under his name? If it’s under your name I would either sell the car or get yourself removed off the loan so if he doesn’t make payments or doesn’t fall back on you! |
7,312,388 | mommit | Don't pay for the car note if it is not in your name. Don't pay for him to have a car to go party in! |
7,312,389 | mommit | I highly suggest giving him NOTHING until you’ve consulted with a few divorce lawyers! Get a shark, and get what is rightfully yours. He isn’t going to look out for you. You need to look out for yourself. |
7,312,390 | mommit | Are your parents drawing up an eviction notice to tell him to GTFO while you're at it? Would be the cherry on top! |
7,312,391 | mommit | Have you called an attorney? |
7,312,392 | mommit | My mom? She elected not to… but let’s not go down that rabbit hole lol |
7,312,393 | mommit | Yep in a lot of states you can sign away alimony but child support is always in play and can always be adjusted depending on circumstances. Ultimately, one parent getting a "better deal" comes the cost of starving their own children. Its insane parents play this game or their lawyers advise them to. "Har har my kids li... |
7,312,394 | mommit | My husband left me last year. I may be a hot mess with out of control children and no money but it’s better than having to ask a man why can’t he just put his fucking underwear in the laundry basket instead of next to it on the floor. My similar mottos that I tell myself everyday are “no help is coming” and “I will pre... |
7,312,395 | mommit | You are entitled to half of all assets, bank accounts, retirement monies, get a lawyer, a good one. and yes, he does need to take his turn with visitation times, be strong about this, he'll want to blow them off but you have to be adamant about the visitation schedule for him to become accustomed to parenting. its th... |
7,312,396 | mommit | I wouldn't be surprised if he had an affair, brief or long term, or both. If you really didn't see it coming and his mind is made up without any consideration to make things work, he is either pursuing another woman or simply has no interest in having familial responsibilities. Weigh wether it would be worth it in the ... |
7,312,397 | mommit | I was in pretty much the same situation as you, a couple of years ago, with TWO kids. Choose yourself and your kids. It is going to be so rewarding a couple of years down the line. |
7,312,398 | mommit | No evidence of cheating but I strongly suspect based on his emotionless discard followed by announcing future plans. He probably didn’t realize a baby would be so much work and change your relationship so much. Jokes on him when the new squeeze gets pregnant and wants to keep the love child. |
7,312,399 | mommit | I was with mine for 6. Two kids. He leaved 3 weeks ago. Granted, this time (yeah... It was another one 1.5y ago but he came back crying that it was a mistake) he is being responsible on the financial part and taking the kids every weekend so far. But as an already tired SAHM I feel so insecure about the money from now ... |
7,312,400 | mommit | Same thing happened to me. We were together for 8 years, had 2 kids together. He checked out of our marriage months before I even knew it and was having affairs with multiple women. I found out and he begged me to stay, I tried to make it work with counseling and everything but he couldn’t change. The second I left he ... |
Subsets and Splits
No community queries yet
The top public SQL queries from the community will appear here once available.