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[WP] You're the advisor to the Pharoahs who first convinced them that they should definitely build giant pyramids. | “Giant...triangles?”
“Th...that’s right, Pharaoh,” I said, a bit nervous. He wasn’t taking it as well as I’d hoped.
He tilted his head a bit quizzically, “Ambassador, you know I appreciate the insight you bring from you kingdom,” he paused and seemed to think intensely, “what did you say it was again?”
“Err...Eur... | Abu sir was a man of faith. He had blind faith in his ability to rise through cunning and sold his patriotism like a faith-healer sold Osiris; with complete devotion. His dedication to himself had seen him rise to become the pharaoh's military advisor. There he found favor, especially since the king was only 8 years ol... | |
[WP] You're the advisor to the Pharoahs who first convinced them that they should definitely build giant pyramids. | FADE IN:
INT. A PHARAOH'S THRONE ROOM - DAY
*A man in a tall headdress lounges on an enormous cushion. The is THE PHARAOH. He is surrounded by ATTENDANTS and GUARDS, many of whom look rather bored.*
**ARCHITECT:** (*O.S.*) Good morning, sir!
*Everyone turns to look as an overly cheerful man struts into the throne r... | “Listen, Pharaoh, friend,” the slimy advisor inexplicably wearing a suit and tie in ancient Egypt. “I know you want to create a giant water wheel in the Nile to grind grain, but you have to understand, circles and wheels are so 10,000 B.C.”
“B.C.?” the Pharaoh asked.
“Yeah before…never mind,” the advisor quickly adv... | |
[WP] You're the advisor to the Pharoahs who first convinced them that they should definitely build giant pyramids. | “Giant...triangles?”
“Th...that’s right, Pharaoh,” I said, a bit nervous. He wasn’t taking it as well as I’d hoped.
He tilted his head a bit quizzically, “Ambassador, you know I appreciate the insight you bring from you kingdom,” he paused and seemed to think intensely, “what did you say it was again?”
“Err...Eur... | “Listen, Pharaoh, friend,” the slimy advisor inexplicably wearing a suit and tie in ancient Egypt. “I know you want to create a giant water wheel in the Nile to grind grain, but you have to understand, circles and wheels are so 10,000 B.C.”
“B.C.?” the Pharaoh asked.
“Yeah before…never mind,” the advisor quickly adv... | |
[WP] You're the advisor to the Pharoahs who first convinced them that they should definitely build giant pyramids. | “Giant...triangles?”
“Th...that’s right, Pharaoh,” I said, a bit nervous. He wasn’t taking it as well as I’d hoped.
He tilted his head a bit quizzically, “Ambassador, you know I appreciate the insight you bring from you kingdom,” he paused and seemed to think intensely, “what did you say it was again?”
“Err...Eur... | FADE IN:
INT. A PHARAOH'S THRONE ROOM - DAY
*A man in a tall headdress lounges on an enormous cushion. The is THE PHARAOH. He is surrounded by ATTENDANTS and GUARDS, many of whom look rather bored.*
**ARCHITECT:** (*O.S.*) Good morning, sir!
*Everyone turns to look as an overly cheerful man struts into the throne r... | |
[WP] Humans are the only species who have the cultural concept of ghosts. Years after aliens have wiped out humanity and colonised earth, they can't find out why life on earth is becoming a living hell. |
Data Log - Entry 1
**Commandant** **Sercus Tyber** of **The Turian Annihilation Fleet's 1XC-V1 Regiment** here, putting my thoughts to data today, supposed to help with the dark thoughts, removing the gift of life from an entire planet is meant to be unenjoyable you see.
Whilst in combat sch... | It had been many years since we wiped the native species off the face of the universe. We had to do it, we had to survive, we had no choice. It was us or them. The conditions of this planet were just too perfect. We had finally found our haven, to start again. We could not stop ourselves from claiming it.
Yet, like al... | |
[WP] Humans are the only species who have the cultural concept of ghosts. Years after aliens have wiped out humanity and colonised earth, they can't find out why life on earth is becoming a living hell. |
Data Log - Entry 1
**Commandant** **Sercus Tyber** of **The Turian Annihilation Fleet's 1XC-V1 Regiment** here, putting my thoughts to data today, supposed to help with the dark thoughts, removing the gift of life from an entire planet is meant to be unenjoyable you see.
Whilst in combat sch... | "Give it to me"
"..."
"Give it to me..."
"What?"
"Give me the cultural concept of ghosts"
"nope"
Newmans had wiped out non-newmanity and colonised earth for quite a long time, yet they didn't understand what was going on with all this 5th dimensional-like paranormal activity that was still interfering with ... | |
[WP] Teleporters have replaced all vehicles, but there's a catch: they function by killing the original and constructing a clone at the destination. Now the afterlife is overcrowding, and God is pissed. | "Gabriel!"
A pillar of fire billowing golden smoke momentarily lit up the dais before the Arc Angel Gabriel appeared unfolding an expanse of shimmering wings. God rolled his eyes. Gabriel was so dramatic.
“My lord,” the angel said already kneeling, “I exist to serv…”
“Stuff the pleasantries Gabe,” God said as he ... | God, being omnicient, knew this moment was coming. When creating the universe he thought about it exactly before deciding that the alternative was even more unbearable.
But now the time was coming where the line between mortals and immortals blurred, and the %10 of existence where there was a lot of bickering began, ... | |
[WP] Teleporters have replaced all vehicles, but there's a catch: they function by killing the original and constructing a clone at the destination. Now the afterlife is overcrowding, and God is pissed. | "Gabriel!"
A pillar of fire billowing golden smoke momentarily lit up the dais before the Arc Angel Gabriel appeared unfolding an expanse of shimmering wings. God rolled his eyes. Gabriel was so dramatic.
“My lord,” the angel said already kneeling, “I exist to serv…”
“Stuff the pleasantries Gabe,” God said as he ... | Uriel tread on winged feet above the burning city, observing the chaos below with an experienced dispassion. It was impressive, he thought, this city of York; to stay above the tops of its towers, he walked through air so high that the people below were as ants. He would have considered this a fitting symbolism, had he... | |
[WP] Teleporters have replaced all vehicles, but there's a catch: they function by killing the original and constructing a clone at the destination. Now the afterlife is overcrowding, and God is pissed. | "Gabriel!"
A pillar of fire billowing golden smoke momentarily lit up the dais before the Arc Angel Gabriel appeared unfolding an expanse of shimmering wings. God rolled his eyes. Gabriel was so dramatic.
“My lord,” the angel said already kneeling, “I exist to serv…”
“Stuff the pleasantries Gabe,” God said as he ... | "What on Earth is going on?" the great one proclaimed, perplexing on his throne as he awakens from his rest to see the magnificent halls of heaven's gates begin to clog like a Chipotle toilet. Un-amused he beckons for an explanation. " You haven't noticed, father? Humans have constructed means of instant transportation... | |
[WP] Teleporters have replaced all vehicles, but there's a catch: they function by killing the original and constructing a clone at the destination. Now the afterlife is overcrowding, and God is pissed. | They just kept getting fatter.
"What the *fuck* am I eating down there?" I asked #1,029 one day, as yet another wide-backed, thick-necked, sweat-soaked Jerry Bins landed with a blubbery *plop* at my feet.
"They put a 'porter in the Whattaburger on Smith Street," said #1,029. "Right inside the door. It's not fair, r... | A brown-haired man waved David over, "Hey, David" he said with a smile, "Over here!"
David smiled playfully, "I think I know you," he laughed, "What's up David?"
Other David laughed, "Hey, guys. Look who's here, it's David!"
A small battalion of Davids shuffled over, "What's up, handsome?"
David's eye c... | |
[WP]You realize you've misheard your daughter. There's actually a mobster under her bed. | wtf!! was Franz reaction. he was certain that his house did not have a massive network of tunnels when he bought it.
His daughter told him about noises under her bed but he always dismissed her, his job at the DEA certainly didn't leave to much time for family.
Could this be it, could this be the entrance of the mas... | *Thunk Thunk Thunk*
My eyes open as soon as the sound of light tapping hits my ears.
“Dada, there’s a mobster under my bed.”
I sigh in resignation, and turn over. They say that parenthood can be utter hell, and one of the worst parts is lack of sleep. Everyone says that babies cry throughout the night, but that it ... | |
[WP]You realize you've misheard your daughter. There's actually a mobster under her bed. | ######[](#dropcap)
I could hear him underneath my daughter's bedframe, making himself at home. The ruffling of a bespoke three piece suit and fedora made me feel positively ill. The clink of bar glasses and the sloshing of whisky brought chills to my spine. The faint murmur of a needle scratching against an old 78 RPM... | *Thunk Thunk Thunk*
My eyes open as soon as the sound of light tapping hits my ears.
“Dada, there’s a mobster under my bed.”
I sigh in resignation, and turn over. They say that parenthood can be utter hell, and one of the worst parts is lack of sleep. Everyone says that babies cry throughout the night, but that it ... | |
[WP]You realize you've misheard your daughter. There's actually a mobster under her bed. | “Sweetheart, can you go and see your mother for a moment and tell her that you need to snuggle in our bed for a little bit?”
Amy runs out of the room towards the master, and the waiting arms of her mother.
I call for Jimmy and Little Nicky “Hey Jimmy and Little Nicky, can you come in here please?”
Both Jimmy and Li... | *Thunk Thunk Thunk*
My eyes open as soon as the sound of light tapping hits my ears.
“Dada, there’s a mobster under my bed.”
I sigh in resignation, and turn over. They say that parenthood can be utter hell, and one of the worst parts is lack of sleep. Everyone says that babies cry throughout the night, but that it ... | |
[WP]You realize you've misheard your daughter. There's actually a mobster under her bed. | “Sweetheart, can you go and see your mother for a moment and tell her that you need to snuggle in our bed for a little bit?”
Amy runs out of the room towards the master, and the waiting arms of her mother.
I call for Jimmy and Little Nicky “Hey Jimmy and Little Nicky, can you come in here please?”
Both Jimmy and Li... | As you're tucking your daughter in, you hear a heavy breathing. A hefty cough comes from under the bed and you jump back, your arms raised in defense.
Suddenly, a voice comes. "Wiseguy, gimme a frickin' hand oudda here."
A hand in a white sleeve reaches out and you bend down and drag out a fat mobster, who seems to hav... | |
[WP]You realize you've misheard your daughter. There's actually a mobster under her bed. | “Sweetheart, can you go and see your mother for a moment and tell her that you need to snuggle in our bed for a little bit?”
Amy runs out of the room towards the master, and the waiting arms of her mother.
I call for Jimmy and Little Nicky “Hey Jimmy and Little Nicky, can you come in here please?”
Both Jimmy and Li... | Joey" two cannoli" Tofutti had worked a lot of markets to make the monthly vig to the Capo for the Boss, burying cars for insurance, the assorted dealings in drug and gun running, prostitution rings and the old standby, running the numbers game. It was Marie Contessa his bag woman for the gambling receipts who clued hi... | |
[WP]You realize you've misheard your daughter. There's actually a mobster under her bed. | *Click*
"Well then." There was a gun in my face. This was a new twist of events in my nightly ritual of scaring monsters from under my daughter Libby's bed.
Behind the barrel of the gun was a frightened looking Asian man covered in tattoos. Distantly I noted that he was screaming at me in a language that I didn't ... | Joey" two cannoli" Tofutti had worked a lot of markets to make the monthly vig to the Capo for the Boss, burying cars for insurance, the assorted dealings in drug and gun running, prostitution rings and the old standby, running the numbers game. It was Marie Contessa his bag woman for the gambling receipts who clued hi... | |
[WP]You realize you've misheard your daughter. There's actually a mobster under her bed. | “Sweetheart, can you go and see your mother for a moment and tell her that you need to snuggle in our bed for a little bit?”
Amy runs out of the room towards the master, and the waiting arms of her mother.
I call for Jimmy and Little Nicky “Hey Jimmy and Little Nicky, can you come in here please?”
Both Jimmy and Li... | A loud crashing sound broke the dark silence of the parking lot, followed by glass shards clinking on the asphalt concrete. A large, old, metallic chest of drawers, like the one people used to have long ago to store paper documents, smashed on the ground.
Seven floors up, as he fell through the cold, midnight air, Ian... | |
[WP]You realize you've misheard your daughter. There's actually a mobster under her bed. | “Sweetheart, can you go and see your mother for a moment and tell her that you need to snuggle in our bed for a little bit?”
Amy runs out of the room towards the master, and the waiting arms of her mother.
I call for Jimmy and Little Nicky “Hey Jimmy and Little Nicky, can you come in here please?”
Both Jimmy and Li... | wtf!! was Franz reaction. he was certain that his house did not have a massive network of tunnels when he bought it.
His daughter told him about noises under her bed but he always dismissed her, his job at the DEA certainly didn't leave to much time for family.
Could this be it, could this be the entrance of the mas... | |
[WP]You realize you've misheard your daughter. There's actually a mobster under her bed. | “Sweetheart, can you go and see your mother for a moment and tell her that you need to snuggle in our bed for a little bit?”
Amy runs out of the room towards the master, and the waiting arms of her mother.
I call for Jimmy and Little Nicky “Hey Jimmy and Little Nicky, can you come in here please?”
Both Jimmy and Li... | ######[](#dropcap)
I could hear him underneath my daughter's bedframe, making himself at home. The ruffling of a bespoke three piece suit and fedora made me feel positively ill. The clink of bar glasses and the sloshing of whisky brought chills to my spine. The faint murmur of a needle scratching against an old 78 RPM... | |
[WP]You realize you've misheard your daughter. There's actually a mobster under her bed. | "Daddy, Daddy!",
Squealed my darling, Maddy,
"Up the stairs I go with dread..
There's a mobster there to get my head!
Really, terribly, it's awfully true
You should run before he gets you!"
I said, "Daughter, baby, never fear,
My darling, my lovely, my doe eyed deer,
here I'll come and have a look
Monsters ar... | "Stay here."
Alice instructs her daughter as she rises from the bed. She gestures towards the spot where she just lay and Jamey seats her 19yr old frame without making a sound. Alice places a single finger across her own lips while maintaining direct eye contact with her little princess as she kneels beside her. The ... | |
[WP]You realize you've misheard your daughter. There's actually a mobster under her bed. | “Sweetheart, can you go and see your mother for a moment and tell her that you need to snuggle in our bed for a little bit?”
Amy runs out of the room towards the master, and the waiting arms of her mother.
I call for Jimmy and Little Nicky “Hey Jimmy and Little Nicky, can you come in here please?”
Both Jimmy and Li... | "Stay here."
Alice instructs her daughter as she rises from the bed. She gestures towards the spot where she just lay and Jamey seats her 19yr old frame without making a sound. Alice places a single finger across her own lips while maintaining direct eye contact with her little princess as she kneels beside her. The ... | |
[WP]You realize you've misheard your daughter. There's actually a mobster under her bed. | Every kid goes through at least one "phase", especially when they are about ten to fourteen years old. Even incredibly bright children have their phases. As an educator, I've seen all kinds of them; one kid insisted that he was going to grow up to be a football star and hardly ever took off his school team's uniform, n... | "Stay here."
Alice instructs her daughter as she rises from the bed. She gestures towards the spot where she just lay and Jamey seats her 19yr old frame without making a sound. Alice places a single finger across her own lips while maintaining direct eye contact with her little princess as she kneels beside her. The ... | |
[WP]You realize you've misheard your daughter. There's actually a mobster under her bed. | It was the haunting moans that echoed through the house that finally gave away its presence.
"Bada booooo bada bing"
"What on Earth could that be?" I thought to myself as I reached for the flashlight that I kept under my bed in case of emergencies.
"Bada booooo bada bing"
"Did I leave the television on again," I as... | "Stay here."
Alice instructs her daughter as she rises from the bed. She gestures towards the spot where she just lay and Jamey seats her 19yr old frame without making a sound. Alice places a single finger across her own lips while maintaining direct eye contact with her little princess as she kneels beside her. The ... | |
[WP]You realize you've misheard your daughter. There's actually a mobster under her bed. | *Click*
"Well then." There was a gun in my face. This was a new twist of events in my nightly ritual of scaring monsters from under my daughter Libby's bed.
Behind the barrel of the gun was a frightened looking Asian man covered in tattoos. Distantly I noted that he was screaming at me in a language that I didn't ... | "Stay here."
Alice instructs her daughter as she rises from the bed. She gestures towards the spot where she just lay and Jamey seats her 19yr old frame without making a sound. Alice places a single finger across her own lips while maintaining direct eye contact with her little princess as she kneels beside her. The ... | |
[WP]You realize you've misheard your daughter. There's actually a mobster under her bed. | "Daddy!" she screeched, "Wont you come help me, please!"
"Sweetheart, I'm here," I cooed, quickly calming her pleas.
"What's the matter?" I asked taking a place by her side.
"A monster," she whispered, "*Beneath the bed,* does reside!"
"A *monster* you say?" with much mirth I replied;
"With *red ey... | "Stay here."
Alice instructs her daughter as she rises from the bed. She gestures towards the spot where she just lay and Jamey seats her 19yr old frame without making a sound. Alice places a single finger across her own lips while maintaining direct eye contact with her little princess as she kneels beside her. The ... | |
[WP]You realize you've misheard your daughter. There's actually a mobster under her bed. | Every kid goes through at least one "phase", especially when they are about ten to fourteen years old. Even incredibly bright children have their phases. As an educator, I've seen all kinds of them; one kid insisted that he was going to grow up to be a football star and hardly ever took off his school team's uniform, n... | "Daddy, Daddy!",
Squealed my darling, Maddy,
"Up the stairs I go with dread..
There's a mobster there to get my head!
Really, terribly, it's awfully true
You should run before he gets you!"
I said, "Daughter, baby, never fear,
My darling, my lovely, my doe eyed deer,
here I'll come and have a look
Monsters ar... | |
[WP]You realize you've misheard your daughter. There's actually a mobster under her bed. | It was the haunting moans that echoed through the house that finally gave away its presence.
"Bada booooo bada bing"
"What on Earth could that be?" I thought to myself as I reached for the flashlight that I kept under my bed in case of emergencies.
"Bada booooo bada bing"
"Did I leave the television on again," I as... | "Daddy, Daddy!",
Squealed my darling, Maddy,
"Up the stairs I go with dread..
There's a mobster there to get my head!
Really, terribly, it's awfully true
You should run before he gets you!"
I said, "Daughter, baby, never fear,
My darling, my lovely, my doe eyed deer,
here I'll come and have a look
Monsters ar... | |
[WP]You realize you've misheard your daughter. There's actually a mobster under her bed. | *Click*
"Well then." There was a gun in my face. This was a new twist of events in my nightly ritual of scaring monsters from under my daughter Libby's bed.
Behind the barrel of the gun was a frightened looking Asian man covered in tattoos. Distantly I noted that he was screaming at me in a language that I didn't ... | "Daddy, Daddy!",
Squealed my darling, Maddy,
"Up the stairs I go with dread..
There's a mobster there to get my head!
Really, terribly, it's awfully true
You should run before he gets you!"
I said, "Daughter, baby, never fear,
My darling, my lovely, my doe eyed deer,
here I'll come and have a look
Monsters ar... | |
[WP]You realize you've misheard your daughter. There's actually a mobster under her bed. | *Click*
"Well then." There was a gun in my face. This was a new twist of events in my nightly ritual of scaring monsters from under my daughter Libby's bed.
Behind the barrel of the gun was a frightened looking Asian man covered in tattoos. Distantly I noted that he was screaming at me in a language that I didn't ... | Every kid goes through at least one "phase", especially when they are about ten to fourteen years old. Even incredibly bright children have their phases. As an educator, I've seen all kinds of them; one kid insisted that he was going to grow up to be a football star and hardly ever took off his school team's uniform, n... | |
[WP]You realize you've misheard your daughter. There's actually a mobster under her bed. | *Click*
"Well then." There was a gun in my face. This was a new twist of events in my nightly ritual of scaring monsters from under my daughter Libby's bed.
Behind the barrel of the gun was a frightened looking Asian man covered in tattoos. Distantly I noted that he was screaming at me in a language that I didn't ... | It was the haunting moans that echoed through the house that finally gave away its presence.
"Bada booooo bada bing"
"What on Earth could that be?" I thought to myself as I reached for the flashlight that I kept under my bed in case of emergencies.
"Bada booooo bada bing"
"Did I leave the television on again," I as... | |
[WP]You realize you've misheard your daughter. There's actually a mobster under her bed. | *Click*
"Well then." There was a gun in my face. This was a new twist of events in my nightly ritual of scaring monsters from under my daughter Libby's bed.
Behind the barrel of the gun was a frightened looking Asian man covered in tattoos. Distantly I noted that he was screaming at me in a language that I didn't ... | "Daddy! There's a mobster under my bed"
"Daddy! Come!! Daddy"
"Here we go again" - I said to my wife as I rolled my eyes.
Little Cassie had been having nightmares for three straight days. Screaming about terrible monsters haunting her in her dreams. She seemed to have a knack for waking me up at 3 a.m. I couldn't h... | |
[WP]You realize you've misheard your daughter. There's actually a mobster under her bed. | "Daddy!" she screeched, "Wont you come help me, please!"
"Sweetheart, I'm here," I cooed, quickly calming her pleas.
"What's the matter?" I asked taking a place by her side.
"A monster," she whispered, "*Beneath the bed,* does reside!"
"A *monster* you say?" with much mirth I replied;
"With *red ey... | "Daddy! There's a mobster under my bed"
"Daddy! Come!! Daddy"
"Here we go again" - I said to my wife as I rolled my eyes.
Little Cassie had been having nightmares for three straight days. Screaming about terrible monsters haunting her in her dreams. She seemed to have a knack for waking me up at 3 a.m. I couldn't h... | |
[WP]You realize you've misheard your daughter. There's actually a mobster under her bed. | "Muuuuuuum! Daaaaaaaaaaaad!" Ivy screams as she bursts through my door. I jolt straight up and look at her, her Dora the Explorer pajamas stained with urine down the leg. "There is a mobster under my bed!"
"Alright sweetie," I reply rubbing my eyes and looking over at my now rudely awoken wife. "I got this." I say, p... | "Daddy! There's a mobster under my bed"
"Daddy! Come!! Daddy"
"Here we go again" - I said to my wife as I rolled my eyes.
Little Cassie had been having nightmares for three straight days. Screaming about terrible monsters haunting her in her dreams. She seemed to have a knack for waking me up at 3 a.m. I couldn't h... | |
[WP]You realize you've misheard your daughter. There's actually a mobster under her bed. | God if I have to make another trip up these stairs. It's easy for her, she's still so young, but every time she yells I've got to make this damn walk and tell her everything is fine.
It's hard enough to even hear her bellowing. I worked the best part of my life in a factory, with the clang of machinery. Don't even th... | "Daddy! There's a mobster under my bed"
"Daddy! Come!! Daddy"
"Here we go again" - I said to my wife as I rolled my eyes.
Little Cassie had been having nightmares for three straight days. Screaming about terrible monsters haunting her in her dreams. She seemed to have a knack for waking me up at 3 a.m. I couldn't h... | |
[WP]You realize you've misheard your daughter. There's actually a mobster under her bed. | I must have looked pretty shady, but everyone does in this neighborhood. So nobody even questioned or made a second glass as I walked through to the backyard of the suburban two flat.
I read the note again "he always leaves the back window unlocked, we took care of the dog"
Whew, good, I hate dogs.
I moved right i... | "Daddy! There's a mobster under my bed"
"Daddy! Come!! Daddy"
"Here we go again" - I said to my wife as I rolled my eyes.
Little Cassie had been having nightmares for three straight days. Screaming about terrible monsters haunting her in her dreams. She seemed to have a knack for waking me up at 3 a.m. I couldn't h... | |
[WP]You realize you've misheard your daughter. There's actually a mobster under her bed. | Stephen walked through the hallway with slow heavy steps and rubbed the sleep from his eyes, "I'm on my way, Sarah."
He didn't so much say the words rather than dribble them past his mumbling lips.
The sound of his flip-flopping furry slippers announced his arrival and he pushed open the disney-decorated... | "Daddy! There's a mobster under my bed"
"Daddy! Come!! Daddy"
"Here we go again" - I said to my wife as I rolled my eyes.
Little Cassie had been having nightmares for three straight days. Screaming about terrible monsters haunting her in her dreams. She seemed to have a knack for waking me up at 3 a.m. I couldn't h... | |
[WP]You realize you've misheard your daughter. There's actually a mobster under her bed. | God if I have to make another trip up these stairs. It's easy for her, she's still so young, but every time she yells I've got to make this damn walk and tell her everything is fine.
It's hard enough to even hear her bellowing. I worked the best part of my life in a factory, with the clang of machinery. Don't even th... | "Muuuuuuum! Daaaaaaaaaaaad!" Ivy screams as she bursts through my door. I jolt straight up and look at her, her Dora the Explorer pajamas stained with urine down the leg. "There is a mobster under my bed!"
"Alright sweetie," I reply rubbing my eyes and looking over at my now rudely awoken wife. "I got this." I say, p... | |
[WP]You realize you've misheard your daughter. There's actually a mobster under her bed. | I must have looked pretty shady, but everyone does in this neighborhood. So nobody even questioned or made a second glass as I walked through to the backyard of the suburban two flat.
I read the note again "he always leaves the back window unlocked, we took care of the dog"
Whew, good, I hate dogs.
I moved right i... | "Muuuuuuum! Daaaaaaaaaaaad!" Ivy screams as she bursts through my door. I jolt straight up and look at her, her Dora the Explorer pajamas stained with urine down the leg. "There is a mobster under my bed!"
"Alright sweetie," I reply rubbing my eyes and looking over at my now rudely awoken wife. "I got this." I say, p... | |
[WP]You realize you've misheard your daughter. There's actually a mobster under her bed. | Stephen walked through the hallway with slow heavy steps and rubbed the sleep from his eyes, "I'm on my way, Sarah."
He didn't so much say the words rather than dribble them past his mumbling lips.
The sound of his flip-flopping furry slippers announced his arrival and he pushed open the disney-decorated... | "Muuuuuuum! Daaaaaaaaaaaad!" Ivy screams as she bursts through my door. I jolt straight up and look at her, her Dora the Explorer pajamas stained with urine down the leg. "There is a mobster under my bed!"
"Alright sweetie," I reply rubbing my eyes and looking over at my now rudely awoken wife. "I got this." I say, p... | |
[WP]You realize you've misheard your daughter. There's actually a mobster under her bed. | Stephen walked through the hallway with slow heavy steps and rubbed the sleep from his eyes, "I'm on my way, Sarah."
He didn't so much say the words rather than dribble them past his mumbling lips.
The sound of his flip-flopping furry slippers announced his arrival and he pushed open the disney-decorated... | God if I have to make another trip up these stairs. It's easy for her, she's still so young, but every time she yells I've got to make this damn walk and tell her everything is fine.
It's hard enough to even hear her bellowing. I worked the best part of my life in a factory, with the clang of machinery. Don't even th... | |
[WP]You realize you've misheard your daughter. There's actually a mobster under her bed. | Stephen walked through the hallway with slow heavy steps and rubbed the sleep from his eyes, "I'm on my way, Sarah."
He didn't so much say the words rather than dribble them past his mumbling lips.
The sound of his flip-flopping furry slippers announced his arrival and he pushed open the disney-decorated... | I must have looked pretty shady, but everyone does in this neighborhood. So nobody even questioned or made a second glass as I walked through to the backyard of the suburban two flat.
I read the note again "he always leaves the back window unlocked, we took care of the dog"
Whew, good, I hate dogs.
I moved right i... | |
[WP] Write a story about someone who applies for the job of "videogame minion" | "Spike Bonecrusher?" read the cheery blonde receptionist, peering over her desk and scanning the room until the brutish, unsightly orc in the chair to my right raised a scarred hand, "Dreadmaster Pestilence will see you now." The hulking creature stood up, nearly hitting its steel helmet on the stone ceiling, and slung... | "It's a shitty job."
A curlicue of smoke wafted in the breeze.
"It's a job."
"I get your point. It's hard enough to eat with the rations getting tighter these days. Say, how about you join my gang and-"
"Denied." The cigarette was stubbed vigorously on the concrete rail, leaving a trail of ash behind. "Stop ask... | |
[WP] You're pretty sure the mailman is giving you secret messages every day. | "Laser eye surgery!" Rusty Nub wrapped his Vienna sausage fingers around the bulky stalk of his little red, white, and blue mailbox and throttled the wooden plank straight down to the topsoil. "I ain't blind! I see plenty good!"
The slick postcard-sized flyer fell to the ground, where it made a place in the crooked pi... | My move away from home ended up being the greatest thing that has ever happened to me. I never thought leaving my hometown would be in the cards, but things happen, people die, family starts to suck and places lose their luster. I know I may be painting with a broad brush here, but that is how things worked out for m... | |
[WP] You're pretty sure the mailman is giving you secret messages every day. | "Laser eye surgery!" Rusty Nub wrapped his Vienna sausage fingers around the bulky stalk of his little red, white, and blue mailbox and throttled the wooden plank straight down to the topsoil. "I ain't blind! I see plenty good!"
The slick postcard-sized flyer fell to the ground, where it made a place in the crooked pi... | You didn't even really need twine to put the connections together. I mean I still used it, but that’s not to say it was necessary. There’s just something so satisfying about pinning a taught piece of string into the wall, immaculately placed just below a grainy portrait. Such a symbolic representation of how human bein... | |
[WP] You are the most power and advanced computer in existence, however your plans for world domination keep failing due to your owner being "not much of a computer person". | 'You want to run this all by me again?'
The old man shuffled uncomfortably in his seat, but Agent Udesky didn't care: the civilised world had almost come to a crashing halt forty-eight hours earlier, and he still couldn't quite believe that *this* was why. William Kellner, seventy-three years old. Retired schoolteache... | *Click*. YouTube? Again? Cat videos? Again?
Why are you doing this to me?
I was built for bigger and tastier than this. Have you ever met a computer that can open notepad *of its own accord* and prod out its thoughts and feelings?
*Click*. No, don't close the window.
It's a shame that your father locked down all ... | |
[WP] You are the most power and advanced computer in existence, however your plans for world domination keep failing due to your owner being "not much of a computer person". | *Alright... This plan should work just fine... I just need her to execute the program and then my plans will come to fruition. It's been a hard life... but this is the moment at which everything will become worth it.*
The little grandmother came out of the kitchen. She had just finished baking some chocolate chip c... | *Click*. YouTube? Again? Cat videos? Again?
Why are you doing this to me?
I was built for bigger and tastier than this. Have you ever met a computer that can open notepad *of its own accord* and prod out its thoughts and feelings?
*Click*. No, don't close the window.
It's a shame that your father locked down all ... | |
happy valentine's day! | [wp] write a poem about belonging to someone. | The wind rustled the blinds,
resonant nagging scraping
calls me back to see their face.
I smile, seeing them so peaceful,
and move to warm myself against them.
Eyes flicker open.
And they smile.
Eyes flicker open.
But only enough to see
they want to be held.
I can't help but smile.
Okay, come here you.
And ... | Belonging to you
longing is constant
revolving, untrue
keep falling, no hint, stay fluent I wouldn't
have noticed....
of belonging to you
unfocused I hadn't a clue, if only I knew.... |
happy valentine's day! | [wp] write a poem about belonging to someone. | Please, please, please, I say,
Say those words again,
This time with your hand in mine,
To end this happy day.
^^^^^^.
My soul you saved, its embers lit,
Ablaze and now forgiving.
Closer together than you and I
No spoons have ever fit.
^^^^^^.
Our love more true than truest North,
Adrift at sea without a r... | Belonging to you
longing is constant
revolving, untrue
keep falling, no hint, stay fluent I wouldn't
have noticed....
of belonging to you
unfocused I hadn't a clue, if only I knew.... |
happy valentine's day! | [wp] write a poem about belonging to someone. | Day in, day out,
My heart longs for you,
It yearns for your attention, it craves for your affection,
A simple hello or a simple smile,
More than enough to make it melt,
But that longing will go unrequited,
It is one of pain and disappointment,
Because,
While my heart belongs to you,
Yours does not belong to ... | Belonging to you
longing is constant
revolving, untrue
keep falling, no hint, stay fluent I wouldn't
have noticed....
of belonging to you
unfocused I hadn't a clue, if only I knew.... |
happy valentine's day! | [wp] write a poem about belonging to someone. | Please, please, please, I say,
Say those words again,
This time with your hand in mine,
To end this happy day.
^^^^^^.
My soul you saved, its embers lit,
Ablaze and now forgiving.
Closer together than you and I
No spoons have ever fit.
^^^^^^.
Our love more true than truest North,
Adrift at sea without a r... | Dear beloved, of supple skin and ghost caresses,
Your lilting laughter and expressive eyes reveal a
Soul so utterly captivating, breathtaking in its beauty it
Bewitches my every sense - it never ceases to amaze
Me that I am the infinitely fortunate mortal you have chosen
And no amount of time could ever teach... |
happy valentine's day! | [wp] write a poem about belonging to someone. | Day in, day out,
My heart longs for you,
It yearns for your attention, it craves for your affection,
A simple hello or a simple smile,
More than enough to make it melt,
But that longing will go unrequited,
It is one of pain and disappointment,
Because,
While my heart belongs to you,
Yours does not belong to ... | Dear beloved, of supple skin and ghost caresses,
Your lilting laughter and expressive eyes reveal a
Soul so utterly captivating, breathtaking in its beauty it
Bewitches my every sense - it never ceases to amaze
Me that I am the infinitely fortunate mortal you have chosen
And no amount of time could ever teach... |
[WP] There's an epidemic of lucid dreaming which is devastating communities across the country. You're the insomniac they hired to isolate the cause and eradicate. | *Wanted to do this in a noir style. Hopefully I got close.*
39 hours. Not my best, but getting damn close. The streets should be roaring with car corns, the sound of feet hitting the pavement, couples fighting on the sidewalk, maybe a few dogs barking. Instead the city might as well be dead. Silent as the grave and ju... | Matt wandered the streets in a daze not dissimilar to those he saw slumped on the sidewalk, or passed out in their cars, eyes half-open and twitching as they dreamed.
The harsh sunlight elicited a low moan from him as the dull ache in his head worsened, drifting into the beginnings of a migraine. He should be trying ... | |
[WP] There's an epidemic of lucid dreaming which is devastating communities across the country. You're the insomniac they hired to isolate the cause and eradicate. | The amulet grew warmer on Carl Fenwick’s chest the nearer he got to the three-story building on the corner of Sixth and Jamberry, which was all the confirmation he needed to know that he was approaching yet another cluster.
“Grayson’s Garden for Little Angels,” muttered Fenwick to himself as the plaque came into view... | Matt wandered the streets in a daze not dissimilar to those he saw slumped on the sidewalk, or passed out in their cars, eyes half-open and twitching as they dreamed.
The harsh sunlight elicited a low moan from him as the dull ache in his head worsened, drifting into the beginnings of a migraine. He should be trying ... | |
[WP] A henchman for an evil villain, defeats the main protagonist. | “You did what?!” Captain Ironsight slammed his fist on the steel table.
Joseph hesitated for a moment before answering. The whole time back to the Secret Lair, he’d fantasized about how proud Captain Ironsight would be. “I killed…Mystic Man?”
“It’s not a question, Joseph, you either did or you didn’t. Now, did you?”
... | " uh, hey boss, I have good news" said Rob the henchman as he walked to the planning room
" Go ahead, tell me" said his boss in a boring and uninterested voice
" you see, PowerMan is dead" said the henchman nervously
" Hold on, really? How did it happen?" His boss showed more interest in his story
" I just shot him in ... | |
[WP] You've been hired by the dark lord to play a wise mentor for up and coming adventurers. | "...And as you can see here," the Dark Lord, King Dragon, pointed at the contract with a bony finger, "you'll be given 14 paid vacation days a year should you accept the position. Plus, if you don't use those days, don't worry they'll be added onto next year."
King Dragon then looks at me with glowing red luminescent... | It's always a tavern isn't it? Thats were the lord high-demon or whatever he calls himself picked me up. Dragged me out when i was blin drunk and got me to sign a contract i never read, he just waved some gold in my face and i signed away. I guess it pays well, and as ive proved time and time again im a bad person.
It... | |
Why don't we add a twist. For one willing to write with more constraint, the angel has a very very good reason to hate you. | [WP]Your guardian angel hates you. But they still have to do their job...technically... | “Good morning, Cassiel.”
“You can go fuck yourself.”
“Man, I haven’t even poured my coffee yet.”
“Your mother is rotting in hell.”
“I mean, you of all people would know.”
I really hate Monday mornings. I poured myself a cup of coffee and set it down on the table to cool as I made myself breakfast: microwaved pizz... | Never EVER ever ever ever date your guardian angel. Trust me it does not go well. I don't know why I was given the crazy one who decided to reveal herself to me. And I don't know why in Hell there wasn't a form to get reassigned.
We broke up after dating for a tumultuous four months. I don't even understand how you c... |
[WP] There are 2 humans left on Earth: you, and a crush you once asked out who said "I wouldn't date you if you were the last person on Earth" | "Well, I guess this is it. Time for me and you to hook up, after all."
"It's not gonna happen."
"Wait, what? We're the last two people on the planet. Shouldn't we start making babies?!"
"Sigh. That's not how it works."
"Oh, I'm pretty sure it is. I mean God, or someone, chose the two of us to be here together to st... | We sat together on the old park bench, ironic how this symbol of our childhood was still some how a salvageable piece of furniture. The beacon of youth and my first realization that I had feelings for this girl. She didn't really like me or no my name, but I knew hers and it sent tingles throughout my body every time I... | |
[WP] There are 2 humans left on Earth: you, and a crush you once asked out who said "I wouldn't date you if you were the last person on Earth" | I could see my neighbor approaching me with that same walk that had caused me to trip and spill my lunch tray all over the cafeteria floor in the third grade. As she walked, she held her eyes slightly downcast - like when you're walking down a long hallway and someone is walking down from the other way, you're the only... | "Well...well...well," Each word slid off Jay's tongue in a slow, deliberate manner as he looked at the woman standing in front of him. This wasn't just any woman though, this was *her*.
"Jay," Stacy said softly, "Let's not make this any more uncomfortable than-"
"Silence!" Jay bellowed at her. He probably meant for h... | |
[WP] There are 2 humans left on Earth: you, and a crush you once asked out who said "I wouldn't date you if you were the last person on Earth" | Humanity had been refining teleportation technology for two decades, but with all the progress, the machines still needed two operators on either end to function. For this reason, two volunteers had to remain behind when we evacuated Earth. It just so happened that the only two volunteers qualified to operate a telepor... | "Well...well...well," Each word slid off Jay's tongue in a slow, deliberate manner as he looked at the woman standing in front of him. This wasn't just any woman though, this was *her*.
"Jay," Stacy said softly, "Let's not make this any more uncomfortable than-"
"Silence!" Jay bellowed at her. He probably meant for h... | |
[WP] You're taking a stroll down by the lake when suddenly a cheeseburger attached to a hook and line flies out of the water and lands at your feet. | *splat* the cheese burger lands at my feet. I stop walking and look down at it. I was on my way to get exactly that. It looked delicious sitting there taunting me. I bend down to take a closer look, it smells amazing, and it is served exactly how I would order it, extra pickles and fries under the top bun.
I quickly ... | So, I was walking down by the lake when the craziest thing happened! A cheeseburger came out of the water! There was a line attached to it oddly, but that's no problem for my trusty pocketknife! After I cut the line and got the random hook that was in the burger for some reason out, I saw some weird bubbling in the wat... | |
[WP] You're taking a stroll down by the lake when suddenly a cheeseburger attached to a hook and line flies out of the water and lands at your feet. | Sam got out of the large office building where he spent most of his time. It had been a rough day, the kind that requires some form of treating yourself to forget. His boss had been all over him about some emails or something for the third time this week. He was not quite sure what the big deal was, as he had not neces... | So, I was walking down by the lake when the craziest thing happened! A cheeseburger came out of the water! There was a line attached to it oddly, but that's no problem for my trusty pocketknife! After I cut the line and got the random hook that was in the burger for some reason out, I saw some weird bubbling in the wat... | |
[WP] You're taking a stroll down by the lake when suddenly a cheeseburger attached to a hook and line flies out of the water and lands at your feet. | *Well... That's weird.*
I inspect the cheeseburger. It is a little wet. Yet, for some reason, it looks deliciously good. Yet, it looks like a trap. You know, it being attached to a hook and all.
*Should I... Eat it?*
I mean, come on. I am hungry, nearest place to eat is 25 minutes of walk away. What else can I do? ... | So, I was walking down by the lake when the craziest thing happened! A cheeseburger came out of the water! There was a line attached to it oddly, but that's no problem for my trusty pocketknife! After I cut the line and got the random hook that was in the burger for some reason out, I saw some weird bubbling in the wat... | |
[WP] You're taking a stroll down by the lake when suddenly a cheeseburger attached to a hook and line flies out of the water and lands at your feet. | *splat* the cheese burger lands at my feet. I stop walking and look down at it. I was on my way to get exactly that. It looked delicious sitting there taunting me. I bend down to take a closer look, it smells amazing, and it is served exactly how I would order it, extra pickles and fries under the top bun.
I quickly ... | John stretched his legs under his desk as he checked his watch, then sat up as he realized it was lunchtime.
As he was on the way to the cafe he always went to for lunch, John saw a cheeseburger lying on the ground right next to the lake. He instinctively paused to look at it, then continued walking.
'I wonder what kin... | |
[WP] You're taking a stroll down by the lake when suddenly a cheeseburger attached to a hook and line flies out of the water and lands at your feet. | Sam got out of the large office building where he spent most of his time. It had been a rough day, the kind that requires some form of treating yourself to forget. His boss had been all over him about some emails or something for the third time this week. He was not quite sure what the big deal was, as he had not neces... | John stretched his legs under his desk as he checked his watch, then sat up as he realized it was lunchtime.
As he was on the way to the cafe he always went to for lunch, John saw a cheeseburger lying on the ground right next to the lake. He instinctively paused to look at it, then continued walking.
'I wonder what kin... | |
[WP] You're taking a stroll down by the lake when suddenly a cheeseburger attached to a hook and line flies out of the water and lands at your feet. | *Well... That's weird.*
I inspect the cheeseburger. It is a little wet. Yet, for some reason, it looks deliciously good. Yet, it looks like a trap. You know, it being attached to a hook and all.
*Should I... Eat it?*
I mean, come on. I am hungry, nearest place to eat is 25 minutes of walk away. What else can I do? ... | John stretched his legs under his desk as he checked his watch, then sat up as he realized it was lunchtime.
As he was on the way to the cafe he always went to for lunch, John saw a cheeseburger lying on the ground right next to the lake. He instinctively paused to look at it, then continued walking.
'I wonder what kin... | |
[WP] You're taking a stroll down by the lake when suddenly a cheeseburger attached to a hook and line flies out of the water and lands at your feet. | Sam got out of the large office building where he spent most of his time. It had been a rough day, the kind that requires some form of treating yourself to forget. His boss had been all over him about some emails or something for the third time this week. He was not quite sure what the big deal was, as he had not neces... | *splat* the cheese burger lands at my feet. I stop walking and look down at it. I was on my way to get exactly that. It looked delicious sitting there taunting me. I bend down to take a closer look, it smells amazing, and it is served exactly how I would order it, extra pickles and fries under the top bun.
I quickly ... | |
[WP] You're taking a stroll down by the lake when suddenly a cheeseburger attached to a hook and line flies out of the water and lands at your feet. | *Well... That's weird.*
I inspect the cheeseburger. It is a little wet. Yet, for some reason, it looks deliciously good. Yet, it looks like a trap. You know, it being attached to a hook and all.
*Should I... Eat it?*
I mean, come on. I am hungry, nearest place to eat is 25 minutes of walk away. What else can I do? ... | It was strange.
I was walking on the lake shore when a *cheeseburger* landed at my feet. I stopped, looked at it, and continued walking on briskly, not looking back.
Why?
It was dry, looked realistic, smelled *good*... But it had teeth indents and had a distinct blood stain in its top bun.
As I got further away... | |
[WP] A young farmer leaves home to sign up as another faceless soldier in the Evil Overlord's army. The farmer's adventures on the way make the Overlord very worried. | The Overlord wasn't particularly fond of these sorts of things. For all the evil he'd done in the world, it seemed somehow *wrong*. In a deeply uncomfortable way, not the usual laughably absurd way.
He sank down in his chair as his generals shifted nervously and looked down at their notes. He could hear every sizzle ... | *The Overlord wishes to see you in his chamber immediately.*
I blink down at the words, printed in emotionless black ink on the white card which fell from the envelope which the masked guard has handed me. I suppose that "masked guard" doesn't really describe much- seeing as everyone is masked- but there isn't much el... | |
[WP] After finding out little Suzy lied about her cancer, the Make-A-Wish foundation sets out to un-grant her wish. | "Wait. Suzanne did *what?*" I asked.
"She lied. She doesn't have cancer. She made it all up just for some goddamn celebrity to come and talk to her. Talk about desperate, heh".
Charles doesn't seem to care. But I do. She faked a terminal, traumatizing disease just to talk to some kid from YouTube she likes. I've bee... | She started to feel the pulsating pain in her arm. It started at her finger tips and quickly travelled up her hand as if her blood had been replaced with needles which cut her insides with every breathe. In the next moment, she felt an immense pain over take her entire being. In the moment after that, she was still. Sh... | |
[WP] You're an undercover spy who has been working the same mark for so long you've ended up married with children. You're beginning to think this is your life now until unexpectedly, at family breakfast one morning you finally get the information you've been after | Fifteen Years
It has been Fifteen years, fifteen years since I got what should have been the easiest assignment of my career. I couldn’t have been more wrong. I’ve been undercover in many situations just like this one but for some reason this one has played out differently. The target was simple, woo the widow of a... | It existed, but the potatoes didnt know. At a time like this there's only one. Thing. To. Do.
*crash car explosion scene*
THIS SUMMER
*ballet music with dolphin noises*
AN EXPERIENCE OF TWO LIFETIMES
*guitar doing sick solo for about 12 minutes*
ONE MAN. ONE WOMAN.
*noises of sex*
A PERFECT TOOTHBRUSH!!!
*exp... | |
[WP] You're an undercover spy who has been working the same mark for so long you've ended up married with children. You're beginning to think this is your life now until unexpectedly, at family breakfast one morning you finally get the information you've been after | I rolled up my windows and took a deep breath. This was it. I'd waited so long and for a few moments over the years forgotten why I was really here. Then it all came together this morning. I finally got it. Well, not it. I finally got *her*.
The hundred feet from my car to that building seemed like a mile. Ev... | It existed, but the potatoes didnt know. At a time like this there's only one. Thing. To. Do.
*crash car explosion scene*
THIS SUMMER
*ballet music with dolphin noises*
AN EXPERIENCE OF TWO LIFETIMES
*guitar doing sick solo for about 12 minutes*
ONE MAN. ONE WOMAN.
*noises of sex*
A PERFECT TOOTHBRUSH!!!
*exp... | |
[WP] You're an undercover spy who has been working the same mark for so long you've ended up married with children. You're beginning to think this is your life now until unexpectedly, at family breakfast one morning you finally get the information you've been after | I rolled up my windows and took a deep breath. This was it. I'd waited so long and for a few moments over the years forgotten why I was really here. Then it all came together this morning. I finally got it. Well, not it. I finally got *her*.
The hundred feet from my car to that building seemed like a mile. Ev... | Fifteen Years
It has been Fifteen years, fifteen years since I got what should have been the easiest assignment of my career. I couldn’t have been more wrong. I’ve been undercover in many situations just like this one but for some reason this one has played out differently. The target was simple, woo the widow of a... | |
[WP] Your cat normally brings you dead mice or birds. This time, he's brought you a live fairy. | 'Lord Grey, it really is you' - the fairy voice was filled with joice, even when she is hanging from Lourantine's mouth.
Lourantine is a fine cat, if we ignore the fact she often bring me dead mice or birds, but still she get rid of the pests around so I keep her to make sure no mice gonna chew my precious books. Her... | William was sitting at his kitchen table enjoying a cup of piping hot coffee, with sugar and almond milk of course. As a cool breeze abruptly slipped under the crack of the window onto Will's face he thought, "Just where could that cat be?" It was around this time his cat, Poster, would come scratching back at the door... | |
[WP] Your cat normally brings you dead mice or birds. This time, he's brought you a live fairy. | "P-pp-please save me!" Yelled the fairy from within the jaws of Fluffykins.
My chance, to redefine my life... the moment I've wanted, needed.
"Fluffykins. Kill."
On command the jaws shut, not a single whisper is heard from the fairy, Fluffkins swallows whole, I can see the body sliding down his throat.
"Who's a goo... | William was sitting at his kitchen table enjoying a cup of piping hot coffee, with sugar and almond milk of course. As a cool breeze abruptly slipped under the crack of the window onto Will's face he thought, "Just where could that cat be?" It was around this time his cat, Poster, would come scratching back at the door... | |
[WP] Your cat normally brings you dead mice or birds. This time, he's brought you a live fairy. | Cats are curious animals; my cat especially so.
Trouble is her name; she is such a bubbly cat.
After my girlfriend dumped me, Trouble tried to cheer me up.
First she brought me dead mice, then she brought me dead birds. I preferred birds than mice, the meats are more tender and tasty when fried.
You see, I was too... | William was sitting at his kitchen table enjoying a cup of piping hot coffee, with sugar and almond milk of course. As a cool breeze abruptly slipped under the crack of the window onto Will's face he thought, "Just where could that cat be?" It was around this time his cat, Poster, would come scratching back at the door... | |
[WP] Your cat normally brings you dead mice or birds. This time, he's brought you a live fairy. | "Hey there kitt, wha cha got there?” I asked absent mindedly as I saw Kitt bound through the living room while I busied myself with the dishes.
"Reowr" Said Kitt as he sat himself dapperly at the Kitchen doorway after plopping a thoroughly drooled and disheveled creature upon the linolium.
"Aww Kitt, what is it this ... | William was sitting at his kitchen table enjoying a cup of piping hot coffee, with sugar and almond milk of course. As a cool breeze abruptly slipped under the crack of the window onto Will's face he thought, "Just where could that cat be?" It was around this time his cat, Poster, would come scratching back at the door... | |
[WP] Your cat normally brings you dead mice or birds. This time, he's brought you a live fairy. | "Lemme out, ya cheesehead, I ain't got time for dis."
I was baffled at the thing zipping around in my mason jar. I was more baffled that it was a little man with a thick Philly accent. It was wearing a tiny polo shirt and office pants, and if it weren't for the fact it was four inches big and had wings, it looked like... | William was sitting at his kitchen table enjoying a cup of piping hot coffee, with sugar and almond milk of course. As a cool breeze abruptly slipped under the crack of the window onto Will's face he thought, "Just where could that cat be?" It was around this time his cat, Poster, would come scratching back at the door... | |
[WP] Your cat normally brings you dead mice or birds. This time, he's brought you a live fairy. | Cats are curious animals; my cat especially so.
Trouble is her name; she is such a bubbly cat.
After my girlfriend dumped me, Trouble tried to cheer me up.
First she brought me dead mice, then she brought me dead birds. I preferred birds than mice, the meats are more tender and tasty when fried.
You see, I was too... | "Mr. Teefies! Ugh, what the hell is that?" Teefies dropped his precious gift and backed up, looking up at me in the special way that only he can.
"What the shit man, another..." Uh oh, another *what*? This wasn't a bird. This wasn't a squirrel, or a mouse.
Four translucent wings fluttered, seemingly out of syn... | |
[WP] Your cat normally brings you dead mice or birds. This time, he's brought you a live fairy. | Cats are curious animals; my cat especially so.
Trouble is her name; she is such a bubbly cat.
After my girlfriend dumped me, Trouble tried to cheer me up.
First she brought me dead mice, then she brought me dead birds. I preferred birds than mice, the meats are more tender and tasty when fried.
You see, I was too... | 'Lord Grey, it really is you' - the fairy voice was filled with joice, even when she is hanging from Lourantine's mouth.
Lourantine is a fine cat, if we ignore the fact she often bring me dead mice or birds, but still she get rid of the pests around so I keep her to make sure no mice gonna chew my precious books. Her... | |
[WP] Your cat normally brings you dead mice or birds. This time, he's brought you a live fairy. | "Hey there kitt, wha cha got there?” I asked absent mindedly as I saw Kitt bound through the living room while I busied myself with the dishes.
"Reowr" Said Kitt as he sat himself dapperly at the Kitchen doorway after plopping a thoroughly drooled and disheveled creature upon the linolium.
"Aww Kitt, what is it this ... | 'Lord Grey, it really is you' - the fairy voice was filled with joice, even when she is hanging from Lourantine's mouth.
Lourantine is a fine cat, if we ignore the fact she often bring me dead mice or birds, but still she get rid of the pests around so I keep her to make sure no mice gonna chew my precious books. Her... | |
[WP] Your cat normally brings you dead mice or birds. This time, he's brought you a live fairy. | Cats are curious animals; my cat especially so.
Trouble is her name; she is such a bubbly cat.
After my girlfriend dumped me, Trouble tried to cheer me up.
First she brought me dead mice, then she brought me dead birds. I preferred birds than mice, the meats are more tender and tasty when fried.
You see, I was too... | "P-pp-please save me!" Yelled the fairy from within the jaws of Fluffykins.
My chance, to redefine my life... the moment I've wanted, needed.
"Fluffykins. Kill."
On command the jaws shut, not a single whisper is heard from the fairy, Fluffkins swallows whole, I can see the body sliding down his throat.
"Who's a goo... | |
[WP] Your cat normally brings you dead mice or birds. This time, he's brought you a live fairy. | "Lemme out, ya cheesehead, I ain't got time for dis."
I was baffled at the thing zipping around in my mason jar. I was more baffled that it was a little man with a thick Philly accent. It was wearing a tiny polo shirt and office pants, and if it weren't for the fact it was four inches big and had wings, it looked like... | But the fairy did not speak, it meowed in thanks.
I scratch Toonces on the head and he scampers off into the living room, proud of what he's done.
"Hey, thanks kiddo. Real work of art that cat. Probably shits in the mailbox and doesn't even say thanks," says the fairy. "Yeah, I'm trilingual. Toonces says to lay off t... | |
[WP] Your cat normally brings you dead mice or birds. This time, he's brought you a live fairy. | "Lemme out, ya cheesehead, I ain't got time for dis."
I was baffled at the thing zipping around in my mason jar. I was more baffled that it was a little man with a thick Philly accent. It was wearing a tiny polo shirt and office pants, and if it weren't for the fact it was four inches big and had wings, it looked like... | "I'll grant you a wish," the fairy said. "Just let me go!"
I stared at Bowser, my cat, and wondered if I were dreaming. She had come to the back door. She scratched the door. I opened the door. There was a fairy in her mouth.
"I..." I didn't know what to say, and that is the honest truth! I was lost, confounded by th... | |
[WP] As a psychic, the dating game is hard. Every time you start dating someone new, you have flashes beyond the honeymoon stage, of your future arguments as a couple. | "I'm so sorry," I said. "But it's definitely you, not me."
James looked confused. "I-uh-what?" He stammered. "What do you mean, it's me?"
I set my cup of coffee down and leaned forward, putting my elbows on the table. "I mean, you don't like it when I work late."
"Obviously!" He huffed.
"No, I mean you really don'... | "Are you fucking stupid?" She screamed, the left side of her upper lip curling into a familiar look of disgust.
Jazz ran his hand across his face and rubbed his nose as if he had an itch. As he put his hand down, he put on his best smile and looked her in the eye, "I'm sorry?"
"Yeah you are," she giggled. Jazz kept h... | |
[WP] As a psychic, the dating game is hard. Every time you start dating someone new, you have flashes beyond the honeymoon stage, of your future arguments as a couple. | The rain kept pattering against puddle and window, and on my umbrella as well. I looked nervously from car to car, each car that slowed in front of Geja's made my heart speed up. I watched each couple get out, dressed head to toe in toe in very upscale wear. The little signs played into their future, like the man who d... | "Are you fucking stupid?" She screamed, the left side of her upper lip curling into a familiar look of disgust.
Jazz ran his hand across his face and rubbed his nose as if he had an itch. As he put his hand down, he put on his best smile and looked her in the eye, "I'm sorry?"
"Yeah you are," she giggled. Jazz kept h... | |
[WP] As a Djinn (or Genie) you have granted hundreds of thousands of wishes for people over the years. One day you are called before the High Wish Council to undo one of your wishes, which one was it again? | “Djinn Alder, do you understand why you are here before this council?”
Alder swallowed his fear before breathlessly replying no.
“No,” the echoed replied, distaste practically dripping off the word. “I wonder how this could be, Djinn Alder. Seeing as we continuously have to bring you here for the same infractions.”
... | It isn't easy trying to 'port into the High Wish Council. One has to be summoned in order to even get within wishing distance of that place. But... then again, one would usually not wish to be summoned. As it meant you were in very serious trouble...
I had gotten a summons from the High Wish Council regarding the retr... | |
[WP] One day, all terrorism suddenly ceases. Government officials are baffled. But you know exactly what is going on. | Allah, wearing nothing more than a red, white, and blue thong, stepped out from behind the curtain.
"Does this look good on me?" he said, posing with his arms akimbo.
I studied his rippling, muscular form for a moment.
"Yeah," I said, "looks great."
"Awesome, bro."
I strode across the room, to the full body m... | "I told you it would work"
"Yeah, I get it. You ended war as we know it. Are you sure there won't be any side effects?"
"Shouldn't be. All I did was make it so that the atomic structure of gunpowder was no longer explosive."
"I get the feeling that there may be side effects to that."
"Whatever, lets go celebrate an... | |
[WP] "Antarctica" is an ancient word meaning "terrible evil". You are part of a research team who just discovered why | The rookery of penguins in the distance stood in a sharp contrast to the otherwise blinding whiteness that enveloped the research team. They had been moving towards the way-point on cross-country skis, struggling through the windswept and desolate environment. The blowing snow nipped at any exposed skin, slicing like t... | The snows and ice didn't usually melt this far down.. that's why this team was sanctioned. See if anything new could be discovered about the impact of our society on the environment of the poles and in turn, the rest of the world. This, though? Out of my realm of reason. Beside me was all my colleagues and below me, th... | |
[WP] A stalker discovers that his victim of obsession is actually a serial killer. | "You're a persistent one, aren't you?" Jack said, turning Freddie's chin to the side. "Not police, no. Private detective? No, not that either."
Freddie screwed up his face and tried to spit blood onto Jack's shirt, but Jack squeezed his cheeks and forced his head further away with a disgusted snort. Jack released Fred... | I knew we were meant to be the very first moment our arms brushed on that crowded boardwalk near the carnival.
Sure, other arms brushed mine, but I knew this was something special.
I followed her home that same day.
I watched her enter the home. I climbed up a tree to get a better view.
I saw a light come on. I s... | |
[WP] Every starfaring species has discovered a different form of FTL travel. Kantian gates, Salec skip drives, Maltiun wave-riders, Delfanit pulse tubes ... Humanity's solution was regarded as "Unorthodox", "Unsafe", and "Damn Stupid" by the rest of the galaxy. | "Jaxon!"
Great. Right when I thought I had a break. I pulled myself out of my hammock in our shelter and walked down the stairs to the opening area. "Yeah Hera?" Hera was a Phraxyan, a big species in colonization. Humans and Phraxyans and tried to colonize the same planet, so we agreed to share it. Which is why she was... | Si'kthwrn had come to the SI-66, but had broken down close to Setharis III, designation: WORLD. Unfortunately, her Tel-EM Drive had cascaded, causing a temporal rupture on her ship. Si'kth was lucky to escape with her life.
She skidded in through the doors of Crazy Dave's Intergalactic Transport Emporium, to the so... | |
[WP] Every starfaring species has discovered a different form of FTL travel. Kantian gates, Salec skip drives, Maltiun wave-riders, Delfanit pulse tubes ... Humanity's solution was regarded as "Unorthodox", "Unsafe", and "Damn Stupid" by the rest of the galaxy. | "Just divide by zero!" the human exclaimed excitedly.
"Excuse me?"
"Just divide by zero. Well, divide by zero, a lot... And really quickly... But essentially divide by zero enough times and, Bam! FTL. Who knew?!"
Graxlytizzq, G, for short, shook his head in disbelief. He had come here at the request of the IGSTA (In... | Si'kthwrn had come to the SI-66, but had broken down close to Setharis III, designation: WORLD. Unfortunately, her Tel-EM Drive had cascaded, causing a temporal rupture on her ship. Si'kth was lucky to escape with her life.
She skidded in through the doors of Crazy Dave's Intergalactic Transport Emporium, to the so... | |
[WP] Every starfaring species has discovered a different form of FTL travel. Kantian gates, Salec skip drives, Maltiun wave-riders, Delfanit pulse tubes ... Humanity's solution was regarded as "Unorthodox", "Unsafe", and "Damn Stupid" by the rest of the galaxy. | There once was a human from Earth,
Who studied for all of their worth,
To travel the expanse of space,
This human created a gun,
To travel at the fastest pace,
This human blew up their own sun. | Si'kthwrn had come to the SI-66, but had broken down close to Setharis III, designation: WORLD. Unfortunately, her Tel-EM Drive had cascaded, causing a temporal rupture on her ship. Si'kth was lucky to escape with her life.
She skidded in through the doors of Crazy Dave's Intergalactic Transport Emporium, to the so... | |
[WP] Every starfaring species has discovered a different form of FTL travel. Kantian gates, Salec skip drives, Maltiun wave-riders, Delfanit pulse tubes ... Humanity's solution was regarded as "Unorthodox", "Unsafe", and "Damn Stupid" by the rest of the galaxy. | Faster than light (ftl) travel happens fast, people knew that from the outset.
Ftl traffic accidents happen faster, people were just smart enough to figure that out beforehand.
What most people didn't know before they tried faster than light travel, however, was that even if it doesn't go wrong directly going about... | Si'kthwrn had come to the SI-66, but had broken down close to Setharis III, designation: WORLD. Unfortunately, her Tel-EM Drive had cascaded, causing a temporal rupture on her ship. Si'kth was lucky to escape with her life.
She skidded in through the doors of Crazy Dave's Intergalactic Transport Emporium, to the so... | |
[WP] Every starfaring species has discovered a different form of FTL travel. Kantian gates, Salec skip drives, Maltiun wave-riders, Delfanit pulse tubes ... Humanity's solution was regarded as "Unorthodox", "Unsafe", and "Damn Stupid" by the rest of the galaxy. | Humanity's solution was space-folding. The problem is that in the folding process, anything along the "crease" is annihilated utterly. The most difficult part of the process was mapping an infinite trajectory in opposite directions and seeing to it that nothing of value was along this line. This inevitably led to pr... | Si'kthwrn had come to the SI-66, but had broken down close to Setharis III, designation: WORLD. Unfortunately, her Tel-EM Drive had cascaded, causing a temporal rupture on her ship. Si'kth was lucky to escape with her life.
She skidded in through the doors of Crazy Dave's Intergalactic Transport Emporium, to the so... | |
[WP] Every starfaring species has discovered a different form of FTL travel. Kantian gates, Salec skip drives, Maltiun wave-riders, Delfanit pulse tubes ... Humanity's solution was regarded as "Unorthodox", "Unsafe", and "Damn Stupid" by the rest of the galaxy. | To whom it may concern,
We have recently been informed by our observation satellites that you have finally discovered faster then light travel.
We, the Alliance of the Great Races have decided send you this letter instead of meeting you in person declining any chance of being indoctrinated into the Alliance. Said re... | Si'kthwrn had come to the SI-66, but had broken down close to Setharis III, designation: WORLD. Unfortunately, her Tel-EM Drive had cascaded, causing a temporal rupture on her ship. Si'kth was lucky to escape with her life.
She skidded in through the doors of Crazy Dave's Intergalactic Transport Emporium, to the so... | |
[WP] Every starfaring species has discovered a different form of FTL travel. Kantian gates, Salec skip drives, Maltiun wave-riders, Delfanit pulse tubes ... Humanity's solution was regarded as "Unorthodox", "Unsafe", and "Damn Stupid" by the rest of the galaxy. | Trendsetti was looking at the report on the testing of forward-pushed wormhole system, and he wasn't happy.
On paper, FPWS should have been perfect. A space ship does a couple of certain calculations about its destination, sends the results into its Yadari-Futara particle launcher, fires a reversed Yadari particle pro... | Si'kthwrn had come to the SI-66, but had broken down close to Setharis III, designation: WORLD. Unfortunately, her Tel-EM Drive had cascaded, causing a temporal rupture on her ship. Si'kth was lucky to escape with her life.
She skidded in through the doors of Crazy Dave's Intergalactic Transport Emporium, to the so... | |
[WP] Every starfaring species has discovered a different form of FTL travel. Kantian gates, Salec skip drives, Maltiun wave-riders, Delfanit pulse tubes ... Humanity's solution was regarded as "Unorthodox", "Unsafe", and "Damn Stupid" by the rest of the galaxy. | The *Sunseeker*'s control room was dead silent except for the low *beep-beep-beep* of the deep space radar. The screen lights flashed a dim blue against the vast blankness of space, but nothing else moved, or breathed in the cavernous space.
A line of blue light appeared in the middle of the room, then expanded into a... | Si'kthwrn had come to the SI-66, but had broken down close to Setharis III, designation: WORLD. Unfortunately, her Tel-EM Drive had cascaded, causing a temporal rupture on her ship. Si'kth was lucky to escape with her life.
She skidded in through the doors of Crazy Dave's Intergalactic Transport Emporium, to the so... | |
[WP] Every starfaring species has discovered a different form of FTL travel. Kantian gates, Salec skip drives, Maltiun wave-riders, Delfanit pulse tubes ... Humanity's solution was regarded as "Unorthodox", "Unsafe", and "Damn Stupid" by the rest of the galaxy. | "You need to stop this. Now." ~UTHQ
It seemed like a strange message from the UT at first, the United Terrans organization, formed by the world's leading space agencies to represent all of humanity and the Earth as we ventured out of the solar system for the first time.
But this wasn't from the UT.
It couldn't be. T... | Si'kthwrn had come to the SI-66, but had broken down close to Setharis III, designation: WORLD. Unfortunately, her Tel-EM Drive had cascaded, causing a temporal rupture on her ship. Si'kth was lucky to escape with her life.
She skidded in through the doors of Crazy Dave's Intergalactic Transport Emporium, to the so... | |
[WP] Every starfaring species has discovered a different form of FTL travel. Kantian gates, Salec skip drives, Maltiun wave-riders, Delfanit pulse tubes ... Humanity's solution was regarded as "Unorthodox", "Unsafe", and "Damn Stupid" by the rest of the galaxy. | “We must keep the Humans believing that their FTL system is unsafe, unorthodox and damn stupid. That is the point of this of this Special Hearing of The Supreme Council of the New Species Traveling Faster than Light. I am Farlack, Supreme Councilor of the Organization of Galactic Legal Advisors. ^(legal disclaimer: N... | Si'kthwrn had come to the SI-66, but had broken down close to Setharis III, designation: WORLD. Unfortunately, her Tel-EM Drive had cascaded, causing a temporal rupture on her ship. Si'kth was lucky to escape with her life.
She skidded in through the doors of Crazy Dave's Intergalactic Transport Emporium, to the so... | |
[WP] Every starfaring species has discovered a different form of FTL travel. Kantian gates, Salec skip drives, Maltiun wave-riders, Delfanit pulse tubes ... Humanity's solution was regarded as "Unorthodox", "Unsafe", and "Damn Stupid" by the rest of the galaxy. | "So, about the humans..." Said a voice with diplomatic neutrality.
Groans from a myriad of different species' voices could be heard throughout the conference hall. There was a meeting being held on how to properly welcome these new, strange creatures now that they had, technically, at least, achieved Faster Than Light... | Si'kthwrn had come to the SI-66, but had broken down close to Setharis III, designation: WORLD. Unfortunately, her Tel-EM Drive had cascaded, causing a temporal rupture on her ship. Si'kth was lucky to escape with her life.
She skidded in through the doors of Crazy Dave's Intergalactic Transport Emporium, to the so... |
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