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That's ridiculous.
Maybe. But that's how it works.
Yeah. Could be. Go say hello, Romeo. Looks like a healthy nonmutant to me.
Okay. All right. And what do I say?
Say something surprising. And funny. Lie, if need be.
What?
Romeo and Juliet. I cried at the end.
Did you?
You wanted to see me!
You're not from Alaska! Where'd you learn to dance like that?! And there are no starving people, are there?!
Why are you suddenly so mad at me?
Don't change the subject! I want you to tell me the truth about yourself.
I've never lied to you. I've maybe let you believe things that you wanted to believe, but I've never lied.
You think I'm some sort of sap?! Don't you?!
No. I admire you. I...I fell in love with you the first time I saw you. I did. I think that you are the most
I want to know exactly who you are and what you're really up to!
All right. Let me tell you the whole thing. In 1962
Adam?!
I'm sorry.
I don't blame you!
Eve, I'm sorry.
I'm leaving, too.
But, Eve, I would
And tomorrow maybe Troy will help you outbecause I quit! This is ridiculous! You're ridiculous! I'm ridiculous!
Eve?!
Scare me, why don't you?!!? You stupid son of a bitch!!!
I'm really sorry!
What in the hell are you doing here!! You're supposed to be over on San Vicente Boulevard having unsafe sex with that slut Sophie!!
I know...and I'm really sorry.
Well, you should be! Thanks to you, my heart is in my neck!
What?
Goodnight!
Eve, if you'll let me, I can
Look! I'm limping! How attractive is that?! What if this is for life?!
I know first aid!
Well, you had better!!
There.
Thanks.
I went to Sophie's and she was very hospitable.
Is that what you call it?
But it just wasn't where I wanted to be so I left as politely as I could and found a taxi. But I asked the driver to drop me here instead of at the hotel. There's a song Mister Como sings called "On the Street Where You Live." You know it?
Sing it to me.
"All at once am Iseveral stories high knowing I'mon the street where you live." It's about a young man who is overjoyed just to be standing in front of the house of the person he loves.
Adam...dumb question, but humor me. Have you ever had sex before?
No.
Uhhuh. Adam?
Yes, Eve?
I want you to go back to the hotel now. I'll call you a cab.
Of course. I shouldn't be over here at this hour.
That's right. And I'll see you in the morning in the lobby. Do you mind waiting outside for the taxi?
Not at all. And Eve thank you for tonight...and for the kiss. My first.
My pleasure.
It was at least as good as the sky.
Really? Okay!
And I think better than the ocean. I'm serious!
Neat. Goodnight!
Hi, Eve!
Hi, Adam. This is, uh....
Adam....you should go with Dr. Aron. It's the best thing. The best thing for you. I promise.
...All right, Eve. If you say so.
...I do.
Could I please just go home? I was lost, but this morning I found home and I promise not to bother any of you ever again.
No.
See! I can't tell them that! I can't ever let them know. It makes their life..well, frankly... a joke. I can't let that happen. You understand?
We can make this work, Adam! Believe me! I'm very good at making things work!
My mother's like that.
How do you do?
I do fine, Adam. How 'bout yourself? You doin' any good?
But I do miss that green sport coat of yours.
Thank you very much. But, Cliff, that's my seat. And I was just
How 'bout a drink at the bar?
Please excuse this interruption.
Oh, brother...
Eve, I don't mean to be rude, and please excuse me Cliff, but Eve, isn't Cliff just a butt with hair?
What?!
I'm sorry, and legs. Legs, butt and hair. Well, isn't he? And shallow, as well?
Shallow? I'm shallow?!
Cliff, I must warn you. I know how to defend myself.
Do ya?
Maybe we shouldn't fight at all. Fighting is pretty immature.
It certainly is. I agree with you completely.
Eve? I'm leaving.
I'm Nina Aron, Adam.
How do you do?
Very well, thank you. I'm with the County Family Services Department. Eve tells me you've been living in a bomb shelter most of your life.
Fallout shelter. There's a difference.
Adam, I'd like to introduce you to my associate Mr. Brown.
We want you to come with us so we can talk some more about your experiences.
Come where?
My office.
For how long?
Well, that depends...
I thank you very much for the invitation, but I'm quite busy today. Perhaps I could see you tomorrow.
Let's go talk first, Adam.
Yes, ma'am.
The key to my hotel room! I want you to have my baseball cards! And please be sure to pay my bill!
Young man, stop right there!
Hi!
Yes?
I was wondering if you might help me. I...I seem to have lost my Congressional Medal of Honor somewhere around here.