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CriticalRoleTranscripts

Dataset card Data Studio Files
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wait, you lead the way outside. Let’s keep our
little schtick going here and then off we go.
MATT: All right. As you guys exit–
SAM: Auf Wiedersehen!
MATT: “I trust you enjoyed your time at the bath,
thank you.”
LIAM: Yes, but we have to go. Sorry, I’m late for
a very important appointment. I drag Nott right
out of here because I saw no doorknob on the
door.
MATT: Yeah, amongst other things. You guys make
your way out and beeline it towards the Lochward
to where you would find Natural Remedies. The rest
of you guys, as you approach the exterior, amongst the
rest of the buildings in the central city, Natural
Remedies is, for lack of a better term, humble.
It’s a small shack, but as soon as you approach it
has very strong, pungent smells of funguses.
TRAVIS: Instant headache.
MATT: Yep. On the outside you can see, right where
the doorway is open, there are strings of herbs
that are tied up and left to dry out. On the
inside, you can already see that there are shelves
of various flora and fauna that are being
cultivated for various remedies and means of
selling to anybody who wants to come by and
procure herbal medicines. Let’s see who’s
handling this one, because you guys have not been
here yet. As you enter the main chamber–
LIAM: Sorry, I will say that on the way there
that I dropped the disguise, somewhere.
MATT: Okay, easily enough, so you guys haven’t
arrived yet. You guys have arrived. As you enter the interior,
it’s a very musty smell on the inside, too.
There’s a lot of fungus being grown on the inside
here, and you can see that elements of it may have
expanded into the corners of the actual room and
it’s not necessarily the nicest space to be
wandering in. It seems natural. Across the way,
you see a gentleman of relatively tanned skin,
with darker hair that’s ratty and clustered. He’s
in his late twenties or so, looks to be upon
closer inspection partial elven blood, partial
human blood, and he’s in the process of carefully
carving a large stalk of what looks like a fungus
off of a small pot that he pulled off one of the
shelves. As you enter, he doesn’t even make eye
contact. He goes, “Hello, please, just wait a
moment. There we are. Hi, can I help you?”
LAURA: Yeah, my friends keep dying. Do you have any
health potions?
MATT: “We have a handful, that is correct. How
many are you looking to purchase?”
LAURA: How many do you have?
MATT: “Four.”
LAURA: Ooh. That will last us probably, like, a
day.
MATT: “What do you do for a living?”
LAURA: We’re superheroes.
TALIESIN: Sword jugglers.
MATT: “Why would– Fine, who am I to ask?”
MARISHA: Look at this bruise.
MATT: “I cut fungus for a living.”