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not how this works. We bank our moments for those
moments when life is disappointing.
TRAVIS: I know a unique substance when I see it,
I’ll take one as well.
TALIESIN: Oh my god.
MARISHA: One for me too.
TALIESIN: This can come in handy in all sorts of
ways.
MATT: God damn it, guys.
TALIESIN: The fact that you had this ready means
that there is no shame here. You were ready for this.
MATT: You’re right, I am not making any of this up
on the spot at all.
TALIESIN: I know, I can tell!
LIAM: This guy went from the Simpson’s Safeway
clerk to the shadiest motherfucker in a snap of
time, because of your question.
TALIESIN: A big, purple, pierced demon walked into
the room and was like, hello.
LIAM: Yes, can I help you, good sir? Yes, I can
help you.
TRAVIS: I’ll tell you what, because you are such a
purveyor of such interesting items, I will take
one of those health potions, but for 50 gold.
That’s the running price I’ve seen in neighboring
towns, and I don’t mean to be swindled.
MARISHA: I assume you’d want to go ahead and give
it to us for that so that we keep this a secret.
MATT: Make a persuasion check, with advantage.
TRAVIS: 21.
MATT: “50 gold,” and he pulls his hair back a bit,
“Seems fair.” Takes a potion and hands it over. He
scoops a little vial and says, “And for fun.” He
throws it over.
LIAM: You fucking badass.
SAM: Cut to an hour later, and someone’s jamming
an adrenaline needle.
MATT: TPK by misuse?
TALIESIN: Somewhere around level eight, this is
going to be hilarious. Somewhere around level
eight somebody’s going to go shopping and the rest
of us are going to be like: this is now, this is
happening now.
MATT: This has become the longest afterschool
special I think we’ve ever experienced.
TALIESIN: Years in the making.
MATT: He immediately gets nervous at her mention
of–
TALIESIN: She’s fine, she’s just awful, you’re a
gentleman, I hope to see you again. I’m looking
forward to this.
MATT: “I’ll be here.”
TALIESIN: Of course, we never met you, you never
met us.
MATT: “Of course not. I don’t know who you are.”
TALIESIN: I am already out the door, with a
flourish.
MATT: At which point, you run outside just as
Caleb and Nott are approaching.
MARISHA: Before I go out I say, nice to meet you,
mister–?