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ugliness of those particular limbs.--This lady is certainly the goddess of this palace. Has she been made ugly through some
curse. It is not proper that I should hastily ascertain the cause of this.--Reflecting upon this in the secrecy of his heart, and
curious to know the reason, the Rishi passed the rest of that day in an anxious state. The lady then addressed him, saying,--O
illustrious one, behold the aspect of the Sun reddened by the evening clouds. What service shall I do unto thee.--The Rishi
addressed her, saying,--.'Fetch water for my ablutions. Having bathed, I shall say my evening prayers, restraining my tongue
and the senses.'"
SECTION XX
"Bhishma said, 'Thus commanded, the lady said,--Be it so. She then brought oil (for rubbing the Rishi's body therewith) and a
piece of cloth for his wear during the ablutions. Permitted by the ascetic, she rubbed every part of his body with the fragrant oil
she had brought for him. Gently was the Rishi rubbed, and when the process of rubbing was over, he proceeded to the room set
apart for the performance of ablutions. There he sat upon a new and excellent seat of great splendour.[198] After the Rishi had
taken his seat upon it, the old lady began to wash his person with her own soft hands whose touch was exceedingly agreeable.
One after another in due order, the lady rendered the most agreeable services to the Rishi in the matter of his ablutions.
Between the lukewarm water with which he was washed, and the soft hands that were employed in washing him, the Rishi of
rigid vows failed to understand that the whole night had passed away in the process. Rising from the bath the Rishi became
highly surprised. He saw the Sun risen above the horizon on the East. He was amazed at this and asked himself,--Was it really
so or was it an error of the understanding?--The Rishi then duly worshipped the god of a thousand rays. This done, he asked the
lady as to what he should do. The old lady prepared some food for the Rishi that was as delicious to the taste as Amrita itself.
In consequence of the delicious character of that food the Rishi could not take much. In taking that little, however, the day
passed away and evening came. The old lady then asked the Rishi to go to bed and sleep. An excellent bed was assigned to the
Rishi and another was occupied by herself. The Rishi and the old lady occupied different beds at first but when it was
midnight, the lady left her own bed for coming to that of the Rishi.'
"Ashtavakra said, 'O blessed lady, my mind turns away from sexual congress with one who is the spouse of another. Leave my
bed, O good lady. Blessed be thou, do thou desist from this of thy own accord.'[199]
"Bhishma continued, 'Thus dissuaded by that Brahmana with the aid of his self-restraint, the lady answered him, saying,--I am
my own mistress. In accepting me thou wilt incur no sin.'
"Ashtavakra said, 'Women can never be their own mistresses. This is the opinion of the Creator himself, viz., that a woman
never deserves to be independent.'
"The lady said, 'O learned Brahmana, I am tortured by desire. Mark my devotion to thee. Thou incurrest sin by refusing to
accost me lovingly.'
"Ashtavakra said, 'Diverse faults, drag away the man that acts as he likes. As regards myself, I am able to control my
inclinations by self-restraint. O good lady, do thou return to thy own bed.'
"The lady said, 'I bow to thee, bending my head. It behoves thee to show me thy grace. O sinless one, I prostrate myself before
thee, do thou become my refuge. If indeed, thou seest such sin in congress with one that is not thy spouse, I yield myself unto
thee. Do thou, O regenerate one, accept my hand in marriage. Thou wilt incur no sin. I tell thee truly. Know that I am my own
mistress. If there by any sin in this, let it be mine alone. My heart is devoted to thee. I am my own mistress. Do thou accept
me.'
"Ashtavakra said, 'How is it, O good lady, that thou art thy own mistress. Tell me the reason of this. There is not a single
woman in the three worlds that deserves to be regarded as the mistress of her own self. The father protects her while she is a
maiden. The husband protects her while she is in youth. Sons protect her when she is aged. Women can never be independent
as long as they live!'
"The lady said, 'I have since my maidenhood, adopted the vow of Brahmacharyya. Do not doubt it. I am still a maid. Do thou
make me thy wife. O Brahmana, do not kill this devotion of mine to thee.'
"Ashtavakra said, 'As thou art inclined to me, so I am inclined to thee. There is this question, however, that should be settled. Is
it true that by yielding to my inclinations I shall not be regarded as acting in opposition to what the Rishi (Vadanya) wishes.
This is very wonderful. Will this lead to what is beneficial? Here is a maiden adorned with excellent ornaments and robes. She
is exceedingly beautiful. Why did decrepitude cover her beauty so long? At present she looks like a beautiful maiden. There is
no knowing what form she may take hereafter.[200] I shall never swerve from that restraint which I have over desire and the
other passions or from contentment with what I have already got. Such swerving does not seem to be good. I shall keep myself
united with truth!'[201]
SECTION XXI
"Yudhishthira said, 'Tell me why had that lady no fear of Ashtavakra's curse although Ashtavakra was endued with great
energy? How also did Ashtavakra succeed in coming back from that place?'"
"Bhishma said, 'Ashtavakra asked her, saying,--How dost thou succeed in altering thy form so? Thou shouldst not say anything
that is untrue. I wish to know this. Speakest thou truly before a Brahmana.'
"The lady said, 'O best of Brahmana, wherever thou mayst reside in heaven or on Earth, this desire of union between the sexes
is to be observed. O thou of infallible prowess, listen, with concentrated attention, to this all. This trial was devised by me. O
sinless one, for testing thee aright. O thou of infallible prowess, thou hast subjugated all the worlds for not foregoing your
previous resolution. Know that I am the embodiment of the Northern point of the compass. Thou hast seen the lightness of the
female character. Even women that are aged are tortured by the desire of sexual union. The Grandsire himself and all the
deities with Indra have been pleased with thee. The object for which thy illustrious self has come here (is known to me). O
foremost of regenerate persons, thou hast been despatched higher by the Rishi Vadanya--the father of thy bride--in order that I
may instruct thee. Agreeably to the wishes of that Rishi I have already instructed thee. Thou wilt return home in safety. Thy
journey back will not be toilsome. Thou wilt obtain for wife and girl thou hast chosen. She will bear thee a son. Through desire
I had solicited thee, thou madest me the very best answer. The desire for sexual union is incapable of being transcended in the
three worlds. Go back to thy quarters, having achieved such merit. What else is there that thou wishest to hear from me? I shall
discourse on it, O Ashtavakra, in accordance with the truth. I was gratified by the Rishi Vadanya in the first instance for thy
sake, O regenerate ascetic For the sake of honouring him, I have said all this to thee.'
"Bhishma continued, 'Hearing these words of hers, the regenerate Ashtavakra joined his hands in a reverential attitude. He then
solicited the lady for her permission to go back. Obtaining the permission he came back to his own asylum. Resting himself for
some time at home and obtaining the permission of his kinsmen and friends, he then in a proper way, proceeded, O delighter of
the Kurus, to the Brahmana Vadanya. Welcomed with the usual enquiries by Vadanya, the Rishi Ashtavakra, with a well-
pleased heart, narrated all that he had seen (in course of his sojourn to the North). He said,--Commanded by thee I proceeded to
the mountains of Gandhamadana. In the regions lying to the north of these mountains I beheld a very superior goddess. I was
received by her with courtesy. She named you in my hearing and also instructed me in various matters. Having listened to her I
have come back, O lord. Unto him that said so, the learned Vadanya said,--Take my daughter's hand according to due rites and
under the proper constellations. Thou art the fittest bridegroom I can select for the girl.'
'Bhishma continued, 'Ashtavakra said,--So be it and took the hand of the girl. Indeed, the highly righteous Rishi, having
espoused the girl, became filled with joy. Having taken as his wife that beautiful damsel, the Rishi continued to dwell in his
own asylum, freed from (mental) fever of every kind.'"
SECTION XXII