reviewId int64 363k 588k | userId int64 33.9k 15.9M | itemId int64 1 1.42M | rating float64 1 10 | title stringlengths 1 10.9k ⌀ | content stringlengths 81 11.6k ⌀ |
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532,704 | 70,535 | 62,430 | 3 | I could barely sit through this nonsense | In the words of Art Bell just after the Kreskin Vegas fiasco . . . lame , lame , lame . The action jumped around like a rabbit on crank , not spending nearly enough time with many of the scenes for a complete telling of the story . The dialogue was tepid and all those rambling songs were just dull , empty filler . The ... |
533,350 | 70,535 | 55,558 | 3 | Had they ridden separately this may have been better | This may have been the worst of Stewart's and Widmark's westerns . Part comedy , part drama , it never went all the way in any direction leaving the viewer awash in a horse trough of boring silliness . This was just another in a long line of indian hostage retrieval pictures . Who cast Strode as an injun anyway ? |
532,616 | 70,535 | 77,289 | 3 | An abominable bore | For this to have been a comedy , I sure found nothing humorous about it . For it to have had the big name comics in it , I found few laughs . It was one of those films that I thought would never end , as a bunch of folks ran around doing stupid things in an upscale hotel . Pitiful , thumbs down . |
532,426 | 70,535 | 35,896 | 3 | huggy , kissy war drudgery | One of the most boring movies I've ever sat through . I kept waiting for some action , and finally got some at the end , but mostly what I saw was a middle aged yankee going bonkers over a very un-Spanish looking woman . There was an overabundance of arguing and infighting among the rebels which accounted for an overab... |
532,685 | 70,535 | 57,887 | 3 | Surf , suds , sand , sex . . . . & stupid | This has to be the worst installment of the series and usually I find something in these beach epics somewhat amusing , but this one fell flatter than a Galveston wave . Even my idols , Eric Von Zipper and his army of Ratz , weren't given decent parts . I could easily have gone without the silvery warbling of Annette a... |
532,593 | 70,535 | 36,824 | 3 | This should have been called " The Drunken Airheads " | Well , Big John fights and loves his way across the 7 seas in this one . Whatta guy ! What a load of propaganda drivel ! The Big Guy storms the beaches with his gang of hard drinking , 2 fisted construction workers . Amid stirring patriotic music and a touching love triangle , The Duke opens a can of whup-ass and douse... |
533,390 | 70,535 | 77,416 | 3 | Drunks go to war | The so-called hunters in this film are typical of why P . E . T . A . formed their animal rights group . These boozing bozos , who couldn't even go afield equiped with a pair of boots , sprayed and prayed the woods over until they finally ran some hapless quarry to ground . A trio of these beerheads decide to quit thei... |
532,450 | 70,535 | 70,736 | 3 | Another Bronson Bomb | Seems like the early 70's was a bad time for old Chuck B . He put out a series of really bad , boring films during that time and this one stands out in my mind as one of the worst of the bunch . Just a series of senselessly violent scenes coupled with dull dialogue and a dreary story . For diehard Bronson fans only , I... |
532,931 | 70,535 | 118,604 | 4 | Tiresome remake | Take an utterly stupid story . Couple it with unprofessional performances , 2 bit graphics , add ultra-lame comedy bits , and you get this film . I thought the original was bad , but at least that story was simple and straightforward , though idiotic . May nobody produce another in this series . |
533,066 | 70,535 | 120,510 | 4 | Boy searches for God | Corny , unrealistic tale of a young boy on a quest for enlightenment after being totally confused by his empty headed religion . Now , how many little boys do you see giving up baseball and TV for that trip ? This film went absolutely nowhere ; one lame , boring scene after another featuring some little cutesy actor wh... |
533,312 | 70,535 | 103,074 | 4 | A really , really , really , bad movie | This is a very popular movie , and I don't see why . It had good actors and actresses in it [ with the glaring exception of Brad Pitt - this guy simply can't act ] , but the story was vapid to the extreme . The whole thing was silly and boring with , however , an interesting and unusual ending . A fitting end for these... |
532,413 | 70,535 | 118,688 | 4 | Not too bad , not too good | The usual Batman and Robin story . This one had more overblown special effects than the others , a sexy Uma Thurman , and a vivacious Alicia Silverstone , but still managed only to be mundane . I did think the Batmobile was cool , though . |
533,197 | 70,535 | 113,071 | 4 | another dull , dreary swordfighting tale | This movie was not what I wanted in a tale about the Round Table . Richard Gere , a talented actor , was not right for this part . But then , maybe no one was . I found the plot to be very shallow , and the dialogue wasn't far behind . The derring-do knight and the damsel in distress is an overdone story , and this fil... |
532,821 | 70,535 | 95,246 | 4 | Missed attempt at doing something different | This , next to Volcano , is the worst Tommy Lee Jones film I've ever seen . The ghost bit didn't come off , the friends of Jones ' character added nothing to the story . . . and the story ! Just what was the story ? Something about a ghost wanting her jewels back and her hubby running some creepy game on Jones . Stupid... |
533,206 | 70,535 | 89,852 | 4 | There are some real freaks out there | Watch this one just to see a bizarre collection of the deluded , the braindead , and the plain old put-ons . The 2 most noticeable of all the weirdos in this documentary were the muscle bound she-man { Bev Francis , I think } , and unbelievably phony Rachel McLish . Miss Francis , who at least saw the competition for w... |
532,694 | 70,535 | 120,616 | 4 | Sufferin ' Sphinx ! | Shoulda called this turkey " The Dummy " . Wasn't anything but a cheap knockoff of " Raiders of the Lost Ark " , with nowhere near the tension and excitement . This junk was merely ridiculous , stupid , silly , idiotic , etc . I've rarely been subjected to such cornball dialogue combined with extremely bad storytelling... |
532,601 | 70,535 | 226,194 | 4 | Santa must live on | When the reigning Santa is no longer fit for duty his helpers must search for a replacement . This leads to a wacky , exhausting hunt and doesn't turn up exactly what Santa's angels hoped for . To make matters worse still , " Santy " winds up being just this side of totally undesirable . This is the worst Christmas tal... |
532,359 | 70,535 | 53,221 | 4 | Too long , too slow | The 2 highlights were Dean's & Ricky's western song and Walter Brennan's portrayal of the cackling geezer . Too bad there wasn't more interesting material throughout because most of the rest was dull dialogue , very little action [ although there was a fun shoot-out near the end ] , and way , way too much romancing bet... |
532,412 | 70,535 | 111,301 | 4 | Absolute rot | Typical Van Damme theatrics as he leads a band of AN [ a thinly disguised glorification of the UN ] forces , taking on a madman dictator intent on world domination . How unusual ! Many full auto magazines emptied , much screaming , and boatloads of martial arts techniques . Phony and totally lacking in realism , but ac... |
533,021 | 70,535 | 62,886 | 4 | Should have titled this " The Dumbass Brigade " | What a load of phony baloney trash . No " crack " unit of commandos would want to ever be allowed to act as these jackasses do . Silly macho dialogue , stupid macho brawls , goofy macho action scenes all combined to make for a boring , idiotic , insipid , mundane , moronic , unrealistic aid for insomniacs . It sure was... |
533,399 | 70,535 | 115,956 | 4 | Join the Army . You might win a medal . | Mediocre war flic which nevertheless showed the insanity of war , the reality check of the war machine's cannon fodder when faced with a real world combat situation , and the political goings-on designed to color the opinions of the civilian population . Not as sugary as the badly done " G . I . Jane " [ I'll bet this ... |
532,820 | 70,535 | 115,798 | 4 | Sick comedy takes a bizarre look at stalking | By far the worst film yet for the talented Mr . Carey . I found Carey's character completely annoying , not to mention the pansy ass part that Broderick played . I've never been stalked , but have had obnoxious losers try to attach themselves to me in the past : this picture was an unwelcome reminder of those folks . S... |
533,589 | 70,535 | 102,247 | 4 | Bear marries Princess | In a land far , far away , a king is turned into a bear by a jealous witch . The bear travels to another far , far away land and meets a fox . Get it ? Fox ? yuk yuk Of course , the foxy princess falls for the bruin right off the bat and runs off with him to the marriage bed . If you want to find out if the couple live... |
532,742 | 70,535 | 53,559 | 4 | Ghouls , glasses , ghosts & greed = garbage | I never could figure out if this was a black comedy or a serious spook flic . Either way it was one of the goofiest , cornball attempts at film making I've seen lately . The plot was more transparent than any of the spirits . The lame acting and overdone facial expressions coupled with the 40 year old special effects m... |
533,141 | 70,535 | 51,418 | 4 | Not as bad as " Lost in Space " . . . but still horrid | When a small glob of space age silly putty lands on earth it soon begins consuming earthlings and putting on weight . The only part of this senseless drivel that I enjoyed was all the cool classic cars . This dog had so many holes it could be sliced and sold for swiss cheese . This thing actually made 20 million bucks ... |
532,811 | 70,535 | 274,204 | 4 | Another " somebody is killing hookers " clone | Nothing new or particularly intriguing with this thriller wannabe . As is current we have the power women and their lackeys educating us all on how much better the world would run if only the girls were at the helm . The police go all out trying to figure out who is bumping off these wonderful pillars of the community ... |
532,550 | 70,535 | 66,769 | 4 | Another ' creature from outer space invades planet earth and kills earthlings ' film | A little more glossy and well done but still just another killer bug from Planet X bore . The group of scientists and doctors sent to combat the ' thing ' went through all the usual dramatic paces as they strove to figure out what the awful presence was and how to negate it , all the way to the final exiting [ ho-hum ]... |
533,504 | 70,535 | 77,327 | 4 | Not enough sauce on this spaghetti | A rancher standing in the way of the railroad getting his property is slated for killing by a convict who will escape the hangman's noose if he does the job . Instead of doing the hit , the con takes off with the rancher's wife , creating a big manhunt and many deaths . There was a big shoot-out at the end of the pictu... |
532,747 | 70,535 | 57,603 | 4 | There's no ghoul like an old ghoul | If I could turn this thinly plotted , badly acted rotting corpse into blood , Dracula and all his kin could feast one time and never be forced to look for human blood again . The vampire bit was the best of the 3 , but was in no way a high grade production . This phony baloney bilge wouldn't scare a 4 year old at midni... |
532,793 | 70,535 | 162,661 | 5 | Hollow headed horror | Goofy tale of a headless zombie who decaps a town's leading citizens for mysterious reasons . A candy assed , blackout prone cop is sent to solve the crime and uncovers more than just a simple case of a spook gone wild . Spooky , creepy atmosphere , but a little silly . |
532,865 | 70,535 | 91,295 | 5 | Like every other biography | Thin , sketchy story ; interesting and well enough done but , like all these life history films , too little in too small a space . Dancer aged twenty years in about fifteen minutes of stage routines , then he went through three wives in around sixty minutes . If one wants to know about Pryor , reading his bio would be... |
532,966 | 70,535 | 89,927 | 5 | When's this old fart going to hang up his gloves ? | I was told this was a good installment in the saga of this dumb pug , and I suppose it was no worse than the others I've seen . Still , it was a case of " been there , done that " . I knew Creed was going to lose , and then Big Rocky step in and clean the ruskie's plow . It was the same stuff as the previous three , ju... |
532,460 | 70,535 | 65,032 | 5 | Too slow paced for what could have been an exciting movie | Too much talking , not enough action . A bad injun stalks a family in the mountains . They spent all the film never seeing the indian , but constantly being harried by him . I felt there could have been more drama to this one . It wasn't a bad picture , just slow and mopey . |
532,652 | 70,535 | 61,189 | 5 | ' B ' movie about thugs on cycles | I first saw this show in ' 66 when I was a cycle rider myself . I liked it so much that I went to see it twice . Even liked the music . After watching it again over 30 years later , I have to ask myself just what it was that I found so appealing about the film . It was corny , overacted , sometimes badly acted , and it... |
532,511 | 70,535 | 277,434 | 5 | The horror of war , the boredom of peace | Pretty good war flic , but the producers could have lost the first dull 45 minutes . They always have to show the huggy body / kissy face family crap before the bloodletting . To me , " Platoon " was a more realistic Viet Nam film , but I must say the carnage was more graphic in WWS . Elliot was tough and amusing as th... |
533,563 | 70,535 | 50,659 | 5 | The King swings and sings till your ears ring | Well , The Big E does it again . . . . fails as an actor , that is . This junk was " Jailhouse Rock " without the jail [ which is where I would rather have been than watching this piffle ] . Can't the producers find someone to teach The Big E how to lip synch . . . . and act ? I howled with glee watching The Big E " pl... |
532,829 | 70,535 | 72,615 | 5 | How come the whites never kidnap an indian ? | Cornball , super low budget film with amateur performances by all . . . and that includes Rich Boone . Actually , Boone gives his standard act , which seems to be basically all he cares to deliver . I suppose he has his bit down pat and doesn't care to deviate . The best performance of all came from his mutt , Bar Kill... |
532,775 | 70,535 | 70,458 | 5 | Laughable | If Dracula ever sees this garbage he will furiously drain every member of the cast and crew . Here we have a vampire who goes " AAARRRRRGGGGHHHHHH ! " as he attacks and strangles his victims , a terrified wife , the standard believer / unbeliever line , and lots of stormy weather [ what else ? ] . Hammy acting , lacklu... |
533,244 | 70,535 | 89,886 | 5 | Animal House revisited | Absolutely nothing new with this offering . Reminded me a lot of one of the worst films I ever saw , Animal House . Surely real geeks don't act this silly , eh ? The popcorn bit was pretty neat , but this format has been done before . First movie I've seen yet with Kilmer that I didn't enjoy , he is a good player but I... |
533,413 | 70,535 | 89,885 | 5 | Frankenstein meets the Incredible 2-Headed Transplant | Not as bad as Frankenstein or 2-headed transplant , but close . I don't appreciate the horror genre so this was not very entertaining to me . I did get a few laughs and there were some good effects but for the most part it left me cold . Buckets of blood and several walking dead for all you lurch lovers out there . . .... |
533,344 | 70,535 | 210,257 | 5 | Cocky car crazy Kook cruises , crashes & controls cut-off queen in kinky , corny caper | This is a prime example of been there , done that filming . Hasn't been that long since I saw one very much like this in which a pair of loonies terrorized a family with a car : a situation which could have been resolved with a good twice barrel 12 gauge scattergun . Not that this was a complete waste of time , but the... |
532,574 | 70,535 | 89,913 | 5 | Was the big revolt really worth it ? | Great battle scenes , but the story fell short in between . Too much crammed into to little space made for a herky jerky tale . For instance , Daisy and Tom were barely acquainted when suddenly they were madly in love without any buildup at all . Not a bad picture , but don't go out of your way to see it . |
533,574 | 70,535 | 63,210 | 5 | IL ' cross eyes does it again . . . . . fails , that is | Another bland concoction featuring the boozy , down-on-his-luck read : lazy Tony Rome . While not as goofy , just almost , as " Tony Rome " , I still enjoyed the cornball humor and tough guy action especially from Dan Blockbuster as he waltzed through his big and bad bit . Had to snort at the unseen nod to " Bonanza " ... |
532,557 | 70,535 | 73,784 | 5 | Once again we find hay bales in the old west | Rugged western with a comedy side order . Several groups of toughs go after an innocent man who is holding a large amount of cash . Of course each group is intent on out gunning , linking forces , or back stabbing the other guy for a shot at the bucks . This led to loads of spaghetti style gunplay and many bodies bitin... |
532,549 | 70,535 | 43,915 | 5 | Did Grant really say " Judy , Judy , Judy " ? | So-so picture which , like many of Grant's films , got a little ploddy in spots . Seems to me a bit unrealistic that some little pissant quack could bring charges against a fellow professional in this manner . I would have told the wormy little toilethead that if he had a problem to take me to court . Cronyn played his... |
532,915 | 70,535 | 83,598 | 5 | Awful ! Awful ! | Dull , uninspiring tale of a playwright trying to juggle a new play , his cheating wife , an incompatible live-in , and a mixed bag of children . It was more boring than a Hank Weirdo , Jr . / Kid Puke concert . Has anybody ever noticed that Dyan Cannon's laugh sounds a lot like a ruptured Bolivian swamp thing ? |
532,861 | 70,535 | 52,700 | 5 | Hang ' em and the let the worms feast on the remains | Good film about 2 slimy little psychos who murder a child to prove their superiority . A big trial ensues and a big tub of guts , whinebag lawyer pleads for the poor , misunderstood lads to be put in an asylum instead of being given a necktie party . I sometimes wonder how those who pity these slugs would feel if it we... |
533,513 | 70,535 | 50,556 | 5 | Evis ? Evis ! You in the shower with a woman , boy ? Evis ! | Hot headed construction worker winds up in the pen after fighting over a bar room doxie . After being released , he becomes an overnight sensation leading to his becoming a swaggering prima donna . He then shuns any emotional attachments to other people in favor of fame and fortune . Typical Elvis fare . Skip it . |
532,925 | 70,535 | 91,187 | 5 | not a very good war picture | This was supposed to be an account of life in the military . It was pretty thin . The war sequences were phoney looking and dull . The acting was uninspired , as was the plot . Once again Hollywood tries to cram to much life into to little time . Skip this one . |
533,220 | 70,535 | 61,420 | 5 | Pretty bad , but fun to see | This one started the Billy Jack craze . Personally , I think Billy is an idealistic moron . He thought he could fight city hall , and never did realize he couldn't . The gang leader had more upstairs than Billy did . And Mclaughlin never did learn how to act ; what a ham . |
532,423 | 70,535 | 41,890 | 5 | Farm life in the early 20th century | A small boy becomes emotionally attached to a new born black lamb and decides to enter it in the county fair . Living with his stern Granny on a farm means there is little money for frivolities , so the youngster goes out and gets the needed funds the old fashioned way . . . he earned them . Many things conspire to hal... |
532,800 | 70,535 | 118,691 | 5 | The Nanny goes to Europe | Well , Hollywood lets Fran Drecher take her Jewish girl schtick to another country . She takes the job of teacher to a despot's children , and all the predictable jokes and predicaments follow neatly in their prescribed order . I've seen worse , but it wasn't a very watchable film . Just stay home and watch The Nanny r... |
532,757 | 70,535 | 162,711 | 5 | Overbaked turkey | Although Trixie had a certain goofy appeal , especially her reversal or confusion of certain words and phrases , I found the film way too slow moving . It was well enough done and not a complete waste of time but it tried too hard to be comedy and drama winding up being just a mishmash of silly dark comedy . |
533,218 | 70,535 | 120,791 | 5 | Wasn't too crazy about this one | This is probably the least entertaining Sandra Bullock film I've seen to date . All the witchery , spells , and chanting coupled with an exorcism just didn't work for me . Can't say I absolutely hated the show , but I never got real worked up over it either . Nice performances by all , good settings , pretty scenery - ... |
532,997 | 70,535 | 54,757 | 5 | Here we go again | It's the same old John Wayne : lots of dead injuns , the Duke slugging a few jaws , the Big Guy taking in the Bad Guy , more dead injuns . I've never , and I mean never , seen so many horses fall down . Every time a Ranger shot one of the wily redskins , could the poor red devil simply fall off and lay there ? Nooooooo... |
533,325 | 70,535 | 105,402 | 5 | Another droll Chuckie show | Well , here we go again . Hai-Karate , chopie-sockie , butts kicked , and a boy becomes a MAN . Why does Chuckie make these dull , meaningless , fluffy little popcorn pictures ? Money , of course . Certainly not to make a point , for it takes substance to make something significant . In this gratuitous pulp an emotiona... |
533,249 | 70,535 | 105,383 | 5 | Attempted murder for money | Not a real good film , not real bad . A woman is assaulted in her bathtub and beaten into a coma . Fourteen months later she awakes and goes on a crusade to find the reasons for the attack . Several people come under suspicion , and she realizes that some she thought were loyal to her are anything but . Not knowing who... |
532,404 | 70,535 | 59,124 | 5 | 2 jerks take on an insane doctor out to get rich | I saw this picture many moons ago , and thought it was pretty funny then . I have gotten somewhat more sophisticated since then , therefore I consider the jokes to be very lame now . I laughed in a few spots , but most of the comedy was just plain silly . Everybody overacted their parts , probably due to the producer's... |
533,554 | 70,535 | 120,737 | 5 | Good takes on evil as swords flash and sorcery abounds | Much better than I thought it would be , but lacked the detail of the books . I was especially impressed with the camera as it allowed the size of some things to shrink while others expanded making a spectacular scene wherever it took the viewer . The first hour or so was a tad slow but at the end I wasn't ready for it... |
533,159 | 70,535 | 70,267 | 5 | Train robber tries to go straight | Not to interesting tale of a 2 bit thief who decides to live the straight and narrow . After coming to a small town and working a series of dead end jobs plus making a mess of his social life , The Kid figures the straight life has it's drawbacks . Dull dialogue and a snail slow pace made this kid blue . |
533,464 | 70,535 | 167,049 | 5 | kids help dad get a date | The 2 cutest kids in the world decide to help their dad rope in a mate by advertising his stats for all the world to see . . . . much to dad's chagrin . Naturally , this leads to adventures for the girls and romance for dad . The usual stuff from the Olsons ' : in other words , no great shakes , but a fun time just the... |
532,485 | 70,535 | 113,028 | 5 | Predictable adventure yarn | Why can't Hollywood come up with something besides the same old stuff that plays out exactly as you know it will ? Every cliche in the " boy lost in the wilderness " tale was brought out , dusted off , and run a little deeper into the turf . This kid was supposed to have had training in the survival arts , but he didn'... |
532,810 | 70,535 | 70,294 | 5 | As bad as the book | Run of the mill " ghostbusters visit old house " bore . The usual spooky hijinks - banging noises , moving objects , eerie manifestations , screaming women , gasps , groans , slamming doors , blah , blah , blah . Can't take this crap seriously and unable to laugh at it either . Where is Anton Phibes when he is needed ? |
533,213 | 70,535 | 116,329 | 5 | Almost didn't finish watching | This was another of those troubled teen films that I dislike so much . The rebellious , bitchy , bratty teen with the weight of the world solidly placed on her brave little shoulders . What rot ! A very hokey production with an unbelievable story about a flock of geese trained to follow a flying go-cart . I've seen wor... |
532,572 | 70,535 | 76,106 | 5 | War vet runs ' shine , races cars | A little different sort of comedy for Pryor ; not as raucous and vulgar . In fact , the last half was more of a drama than a comedy . Pretty much run of the mill biography of some racer I've never heard of ; lots of fun car racing scenes - many of them the real thing . When the film ended I had to wonder if every south... |
532,424 | 70,535 | 108,559 | 5 | Adventure plot # 1 - | Not a bad production [ but certainly , not good ] , and the scenery was splendid , but this was a re-make of a tired old storyline . A group of teens [ a couple of which looked 25 or so ] head for the mountains for a several days long trek . Naturally things go awry as a terrible tragedy befalls the group . As the gall... |
532,607 | 70,535 | 91,458 | 5 | Im'a gonna rub'a dis punk'a out'a | This film proves it : mobsters make lousy family men . A sluggish look at a tyrannical mafia leader and the deadly effect his " business " has on his dysfunctional family . Like all these ' life story ' pictures the story is way too sketchy and rushes along barely skimming the surface of these folks tragic lives . Good... |
532,530 | 70,535 | 58,997 | 5 | American child goes missing in Great Britain | Tedious tale of a police investigation into the disappearance of a little girl from a day care center . The cops are unable to decide who has taken the child or even if one exists . The ending made the entire film pointless . Typical dull British fare . |
532,617 | 70,535 | 91,472 | 5 | Had more holes than the Titanic | Totally unbelievable story about a pair of kids who penetrate a highly classified , super secret government bomb making lab . There were so many flaws in this thing that I never could get interested in it . The dialogue , which was supposed to be tense , was just corny beyond belief . No drama either , I don't know , m... |
533,410 | 70,535 | 63,350 | 5 | Another " masterpiece " from the master of independent film making | Who cares if this is a classic ? It is still a badly done , silly assed zombie dungheap . We see the walking dead breaking into a house , eating crispie critters out of a truck , breaking into a house , chowing down on more flesh and on and on . . . . The director couldn't even make up his mind from shot to shot whethe... |
533,381 | 70,535 | 95,304 | 5 | This one didn't raise my spirits much | Another in a long line of ghostly comedies which does little to frighten , and even less to amuse . Getting to eyeball Miss Hannah and the breathy Jen Tilley was a treat , but not enough of one to recommend this dismal film . I wonder if Jennifer will ever make a decent picture . . . but what a sweet , panting voice sh... |
532,659 | 70,535 | 97,503 | 5 | bland and unexciting | Besides being pretty dull , I don't see how any of this could have happened . No way could this lunkhead hole up in the attic without being found out on day one . Why didn't someone notice the wall with a door in it ? Three windows were showing from the outside and only 2 inside . Doesn't that give somebody a clue ? Th... |
533,056 | 70,535 | 97,500 | 5 | I coulda been watching the IFC channel | Occasionally amusing but for the most part I just sat there and watched these folks go through their paces . This was merely one of those pictures created to fill up a film reel and make a nice payday for a big name actor . A pointless exercise in tedium . |
532,952 | 70,535 | 60,708 | 5 | A little too silly for me | Modesty , a contract spy / hitman , hires out to the British ; her job is finding several million dollars worth of diamonds . Her problem in succeeding is a psychotic billionaire and his lackeys . Miss Blaise and her partner , a stud with a penchant for cutlery , get in and out of a dozen tight spots , finally having a... |
532,934 | 70,535 | 96,171 | 5 | Summer of ' 42 revisited . . . . and not done any better | When a middle aged man receives word that an old friend has died , he begins remembering his youth in a series of flashbacks . When not involved with his remembrances he is trying to figure out how to dispose of the friend's ashes as per her wishes stated in her will . This must have been a ladies movie ; I found it to... |
532,570 | 70,535 | 113,280 | 5 | Chubby short order cook checks out teen waitress | Not exactly a boring film but close . All the characters were just the most pathetic losers imaginable . . . . especially the obese pizza slinger . Those jittery , wet eyes gave me the creeps ; not to mention his mother dominated , go nowhere , do nothing , I have a need but don't know what it is and couldn't fulfill i... |
532,598 | 70,535 | 22,353 | 5 | German u-boat plays cat and mouse with allied gunboat in WW1 | Rarely have I seen such stilted , hammy , and just plain bad acting . There didn't appear to be a professional performer in the whole picture . And the dialogue ! Gad ! The skipper of the allied vessel came off more like a cheerleader than a leader of men . I still enjoyed the film ; even with all the cornball humor fr... |
533,302 | 70,535 | 80,754 | 5 | Greedy , big money oil interests rule | After a fellow employee is murdered , a police detective uncovers a plot by a large oil firm attempting a shady deal . Not a good film , it bogs down too often in it's own complexity . Lots of cloak and dagger double dealing for those who like mystery agents and government / big money conspiracy plans . |
533,104 | 70,535 | 109,402 | 5 | At least it was aptly named . . . it offered little else | Why is Hollywood still turning out these films ? Absolutely nothing new in this noisy kaleidoscope of speeding cars , exploding trucks and choppers , and swearing policemen . The gags would have proven funny 30 years ago , but are old hat today . I did like the frozen cadaver sequence , however . The ending of this pic... |
533,346 | 70,535 | 57,083 | 5 | BIG E bops , bounces , bags babes , and bores | Another in a long line of dull films from THE BIG E . This time he goes south of the border to sunny Acupulco to play a lounge lizard who also proves his manhood by high diving and taking crap from nobody , particularly a loud mouth who feels THE BIG E is a threat to his position as head stud of the area . Plenty of st... |
532,566 | 70,535 | 199,753 | 5 | Another harrowing yawn space rescue | Here we go again with the Lost in Space routine . Once again the viewer is saddled with the female commander { this one is being beaten to death } who refers to her subordinates as ' boys ' . This sexism would have created some bitchy dialogue had the roles been reversed . There was simply nothing new offered with this... |
532,568 | 70,535 | 160,127 | 5 | Matrix chix | This rubbish should be given a paper medal for going way , way above and beyond the call of stupidity . I never watched the original series on TV and after viewing this drivel I feel fortunate indeed . What was the point of filming this piffle which could have been titled " Charlie's Airheads " ? I figure it was made t... |
533,355 | 70,535 | 89,543 | 5 | Goofy CIA caper | When 2 secret government agencies go at each other an innocent young man becomes involved simply over his footwear . This led to his being assaulted by 4 inept hit men , used by a female spy after he falls in love with her , and having his whole life turned inside out . Ok , but not one of Hank's better films . |
532,548 | 70,535 | 32,145 | 5 | Good love done gone bad | Love bloomed between Heathcliff and Cathy until Cathy grew up and came to realize money , class , and station in life meant more than a pure , undying love from the heart . I couldn't agree more , but the lady wound up finding out that there was more to Heathcliff than a downtrodden , unwashed stable hand . Dreadfully ... |
533,564 | 70,535 | 58,659 | 5 | Now I know where Elvis got the jumpsuit idea | Four scientists go forward in time to a future populated by a group of folks dressed in jumpsuits and house shoes , the last of the human race . The climate will no longer sustain them and they must vacate to another planet and , of course , can't take the scientists who must then figure out how to go back after losing... |
533,331 | 70,535 | 70,047 | 5 | bland look at demonic possession | A little girl becomes possessed by demons . Her mother becomes upset and calls in a group of Catholic ghostbusters . The little girl talks funny , levitates , and makes ugly faces . The priests bust the ghost and all live happily ever after . What a droll film . yawn |
532,490 | 70,535 | 113,271 | 5 | Dismal attempt at spook show | This was worse than a Harlequin romance novel : the only good part was the old castle and the surrounding landscape . Hammy , overdone rehash of every 2 bit ghostly / old manse film that's ever been done . It provided rain , lightning , dim corridors , haunting music , candles blowing out , spectral beings , and on and... |
533,476 | 70,535 | 70,125 | 5 | The gospels according to Johnny | Simplistic look at the coming of the Messiah put to song and music by Cash , Carter , and Kristofferson . I liked the use of the original area in the Mideast for filming but couldn't they have found a more Jewish looking man to portray Christ ? Near the end of the picture the cross scene leapt from Calvary to a modern ... |
533,514 | 70,535 | 91,750 | 5 | Bland murder mystery | Mason takes on another seemingly hopeless case when a man murders a talk show host on television in front of 40 million viewers . The blanks he thought he was firing [ the recoil from the . 357 magnum should have told him the round was live ] had been replaced by a nefarious felon intent on making him the patsy . As us... |
532,758 | 70,535 | 85,154 | 5 | rah rah rah blah blah blah | While this wasn't a throwaway it didn't garner any extra points with me either . Most of the characters aggravated me to no end ; the little girls who were ' in love ' , the jock who impregnates his girlfriend [ read : slut ] and then blathers ' it is what I really want ' [ this pea brain has no clue to what he ' wants... |
532,797 | 70,535 | 190,865 | 5 | It put me horizontal . Yawn | Standard connect the dots action / adventure yarn with an abundance of thrills , spills , and chills . Unfortunately , it registered 10 on the Richter scale of hammy acting , dipsy dialogue , and toilet paper thin plot . Hell , I was actually happy to watch some of the mountaineers go sailing over the edge , they were ... |
532,760 | 70,535 | 35,664 | 5 | At least it wasn't as bad as some I've seen | This may not have been as bad as I expected , but it was close . Some may like it but for my money this slop plays strictly for the unsophisticated 40's mentality . Several of the actors were overweight , obviously out of shape grandfatherly types clearly way too old for combat , some of the scenes were obviously paint... |
533,277 | 70,535 | 74,608 | 5 | 2 groups attempt robbing the same bank | A pair of inept vaudevillians team up with a liberal newswoman to rob a bank . Her reasons were for the furtherance of mankind . At the same time a notorious thief and his gang are plotting the same job . The reason he uses is simple revenge . This was pretty banal stuff , but was fairly entertaining and had a ridiculo... |
533,042 | 70,535 | 107,090 | 5 | Can't trust the cops or the media | Not bad but another re-run of bad cop / harried citizen . Things were simply too pat for me even though it was fairly well done . I did appreciate the surprise at the end , but not so much the ending itself . I still find Matlin's voice totally irritating . |
533,098 | 70,535 | 60,453 | 5 | What was the attraction with this breeding sow ? | Oh so British comedy showing unfulfilled Georgy romping through ruddy London waxing from giddy smiles to sniveling tears when her status as a non-mommy hits her . Why 2 men went all ga-ga over this baby crazy sweat hog goes beyond me , but thrilled they were . I loved the look on Mason's face in the final frame as the ... |
533,289 | 70,535 | 50,903 | 5 | I began to wonder where the river came in | When a married woman's old lover comes back into her life things began to go to hell for her and hubby . The old flame had a suitcase full of wrongfully gained capital that he wanted the pair to help him smuggle south of the border , therefore an uneasy alliance was formed and a dangerous trek through the badlands was ... |
533,111 | 70,535 | 212,720 | 5 | E . T . with different initials | Fairly interesting yarn with lots of nifty graphics , sights , and sounds . This is not the type of film I usually go for , but the story was solid , the performances strong , and the finale well done . I liked the way the producers turned a tale of ' machinery ' into a love story . |
532,504 | 70,535 | 57,129 | 5 | Good spook scenes , but the film was too slow | I enjoyed this production , the old house was impressive and creepy . The scenes with the hammering sounds and the moanings and whispering was very effective . I felt that overall the picture could have been more lively ; the dialogue was way too slow in parts . Worth seeing though . |
532,750 | 70,535 | 260,866 | 5 | One word is about all this deserves | A decent enough shoot-em-up but it has been done already . The acting was fine , the dialogue was okay , I even enjoyed the movie ; obviously it was not a low budget throwaway . However , I knew from the opening sequence pretty much what was going to happen and how it would turn out . Rainy day fare only . |
532,776 | 70,535 | 120,211 | 5 | Tramp teases Texan ; manipulates mutt for money ; learns lasting lessons on love | Passable film concerning a cynical woman who dreams of true love while fleecing hand picked lovers . Mistaken identity leads her on a path of discovery , learning there's more to life than money and things . Real fiction , not real life . |
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