subreddit stringclasses 7
values | author stringlengths 3 20 | id stringlengths 5 7 | content stringlengths 67 30.4k | score int64 0 140k |
|---|---|---|---|---|
programmerhumor | zubwaabwaa | igizqha | <|sols|><|sot|>Linux users installing a Python module<|eot|><|sol|>https://v.redd.it/fdcbuoh835c91<|eol|><|sor|>You get used to it. I dont even see the code. All I see is blonde, brunette, redhead.<|eor|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 3,072 |
programmerhumor | RogueDisciple | igit6np | <|sols|><|sot|>Linux users installing a Python module<|eot|><|sol|>https://v.redd.it/fdcbuoh835c91<|eol|><|sor|>Or a npm package<|eor|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 1,155 |
programmerhumor | Andrew_Commander | igix7rc | <|sols|><|sot|>Linux users installing a Python module<|eot|><|sol|>https://v.redd.it/fdcbuoh835c91<|eol|><|sor|>Bet if one of those monitors was vertical it would go a lot faster<|eor|><|sor|>How about it being upside down also how many monitors do you need? You only rage once.<|eor|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 714 |
programmerhumor | cyanideh1gh | igj0uae | <|sols|><|sot|>Linux users installing a Python module<|eot|><|sol|>https://v.redd.it/fdcbuoh835c91<|eol|><|sor|>You get used to it. I dont even see the code. All I see is blonde, brunette, redhead.<|eor|><|sor|>What about the women in the red dress<|eor|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 627 |
programmerhumor | Money-Firefighter534 | igizb1a | <|sols|><|sot|>Linux users installing a Python module<|eot|><|sol|>https://v.redd.it/fdcbuoh835c91<|eol|><|sor|>sudo apt install python3-pip -y && pip3 install psutil
Thats it! Just wait
Edit: removed sudo -H in second one<|eor|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 451 |
programmerhumor | nolitos | igiygnm | <|sols|><|sot|>Linux users installing a Python module<|eot|><|sol|>https://v.redd.it/fdcbuoh835c91<|eol|><|sor|>Where programmer socks<|eor|><|sor|>Fake: no programmer socks
Straight: no programmer socks<|eor|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 430 |
programmerhumor | mb557x | igitbi9 | <|sols|><|sot|>Linux users installing a Python module<|eot|><|sol|>https://v.redd.it/fdcbuoh835c91<|eol|><|sor|>Or a npm package<|eor|><|soopr|>Or a browser.<|eoopr|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 268 |
programmerhumor | ichbinjasokreativ | igj1pcd | <|sols|><|sot|>Linux users installing a Python module<|eot|><|sol|>https://v.redd.it/fdcbuoh835c91<|eol|><|sor|>at this point we need a meme where windows users make a thousand mouseclicks trying to install something.<|eor|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 248 |
programmerhumor | Prawny | igj9ar3 | <|sols|><|sot|>Linux users installing a Python module<|eot|><|sol|>https://v.redd.it/fdcbuoh835c91<|eol|><|sor|>Oh no, terminal scary<|eor|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 243 |
programmerhumor | mb557x | igizv67 | <|sols|><|sot|>Linux users installing a Python module<|eot|><|sol|>https://v.redd.it/fdcbuoh835c91<|eol|><|sor|>sudo apt install python3-pip -y && pip3 install psutil
Thats it! Just wait
Edit: removed sudo -H in second one<|eor|><|soopr|>*"This little manoeuvre's gonna cost us 51 years..."*<|eoopr|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 236 |
programmerhumor | Helliarc | igj7x6l | <|sols|><|sot|>Linux users installing a Python module<|eot|><|sol|>https://v.redd.it/fdcbuoh835c91<|eol|><|sor|>You get used to it. I dont even see the code. All I see is blonde, brunette, redhead.<|eor|><|sor|>What about the women in the red dress<|eor|><|sor|>How many are there? I thought there was only one...<|eor|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 224 |
programmerhumor | root-kali_ | igj2ay5 | <|sols|><|sot|>Linux users installing a Python module<|eot|><|sol|>https://v.redd.it/fdcbuoh835c91<|eol|><|sor|>"I'm in"<|eor|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 220 |
programmerhumor | collectablecat | igjckpu | <|sols|><|sot|>Linux users installing a Python module<|eot|><|sol|>https://v.redd.it/fdcbuoh835c91<|eol|><|sor|>Where programmer socks<|eor|><|sor|>Fake: no programmer socks
Straight: no programmer socks<|eor|><|sor|>Would being gay really make me a better programmer? Tell me. I will suck a dick right now.<|eor|><|sor|>Before i transitioned i was only an intern engineer. Now im a staff engineer.
Pretty sure it was the estrogen + socks that did it<|eor|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 217 |
programmerhumor | Green-Bluebird-2955 | igiyhh3 | <|sols|><|sot|>Linux users installing a Python module<|eot|><|sol|>https://v.redd.it/fdcbuoh835c91<|eol|><|sor|>Finally I can print hello world<|eor|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 205 |
programmerhumor | eldorel | igjep60 | <|sols|><|sot|>Linux users installing a Python module<|eot|><|sol|>https://v.redd.it/fdcbuoh835c91<|eol|><|sor|>Bet if one of those monitors was vertical it would go a lot faster<|eor|><|sor|>How about it being upside down also how many monitors do you need? You only rage once.<|eor|><|sor|>You joke, but my primary monitor *is* mounted upside down.
It's got roughly 3cm of bezel and logo on the bottom and maybe 3 mm of bezel on the top left and right, so I flipped it upside down.
This way the screen is where I want it and I have more room underneath between the bottom edge and my desk.
(I have a refurbed surface pro there as a touch screen pcdash replacement)
I just flip it back in the gpu driver.<|eor|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 197 |
programmerhumor | TheDownvotesFarmer | igj4d7g | <|sols|><|sot|>Linux users installing a Python module<|eot|><|sol|>https://v.redd.it/fdcbuoh835c91<|eol|><|sor|>Bet if one of those monitors was vertical it would go a lot faster<|eor|><|sor|>How about it being upside down also how many monitors do you need? You only rage once.<|eor|><|sor|>That's unisntalling<|eor|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 188 |
programmerhumor | Mal_Dun | igja2o2 | <|sols|><|sot|>Linux users installing a Python module<|eot|><|sol|>https://v.redd.it/fdcbuoh835c91<|eol|><|sor|>The same output you get when you execute pip install on Windows ...<|eor|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 170 |
programmerhumor | derfl007 | 8rbmh9 | <|sols|><|sot|>AI you say?<|eot|><|sol|>https://i.imgur.com/jOo627t.jpg<|eol|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 41,738 |
programmerhumor | The_Perge | e0q7dqb | <|sols|><|sot|>AI you say?<|eot|><|sol|>https://i.imgur.com/jOo627t.jpg<|eol|><|sor|>They used **coding** and **algorithms** to detect when youre working.<|eor|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 4,687 |
programmerhumor | Derek_Boring_Name | e0pyyvw | <|sols|><|sot|>AI you say?<|eot|><|sol|>https://i.imgur.com/jOo627t.jpg<|eol|><|sor|>Most of these bad uses of the term AI are at least talking about a series of if statements, but to get the updates as smooth as possible would be one if statement. If computer is on DONT FUCKING UPDATE<|eor|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 1,669 |
programmerhumor | deviantbono | e0qlzwh | <|sols|><|sot|>AI you say?<|eot|><|sol|>https://i.imgur.com/jOo627t.jpg<|eol|><|sor|>At my job it's more like:
If(user.stepsAwayfromDeskMoreThan5minutes() && user.hasUnsavedWork())
{
update();
}<|eor|><|sor|>Hey, if the user is gone for more than 15 seconds you are legally allowed to update. <|eor|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 737 |
programmerhumor | Triumph7560 | e0q18gy | <|sols|><|sot|>AI you say?<|eot|><|sol|>https://i.imgur.com/jOo627t.jpg<|eol|><|sor|>"There's an update" "Oh okay. Let me finish what I'm doing so I can save then" "*I SAID THERE WAS AN UPDATE*"<|eor|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 680 |
programmerhumor | AyrA_ch | e0q0nl2 | <|sols|><|sot|>AI you say?<|eot|><|sol|>https://i.imgur.com/jOo627t.jpg<|eol|><|sor|>Most of these bad uses of the term AI are at least talking about a series of if statements, but to get the updates as smooth as possible would be one if statement. If computer is on DONT FUCKING UPDATE<|eor|><|sor|>[All we want is this again](https://i.imgur.com/mrrHQIU.png)
To get this now you have to cheat your way around it<|eor|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 560 |
programmerhumor | ElementOfExpectation | e0qk8et | <|sols|><|sot|>AI you say?<|eot|><|sol|>https://i.imgur.com/jOo627t.jpg<|eol|><|sor|>They used **coding** and **algorithms** to detect when youre working.<|eor|><|sor|>Deep machine learning blockchain based cloud coding algorithm to detect when you're working.<|eor|><|sor|>Forgot quantum.<|eor|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 331 |
programmerhumor | Fireplay5 | e0q1z4t | <|sols|><|sot|>AI you say?<|eot|><|sol|>https://i.imgur.com/jOo627t.jpg<|eol|><|sor|>[deleted]<|eor|><|sor|>It's like the computer knows just when the worst possible moment to update is and gives you no time to prepare. <|eor|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 304 |
programmerhumor | dds555 | e0q1ans | <|sols|><|sot|>AI you say?<|eot|><|sol|>https://i.imgur.com/jOo627t.jpg<|eol|><|sor|>"How would we fix this?" *hires consultant*
"I got this, move over amateur"
if(user.isDoingStuff() && user.hasUnsavedWork()) {
update(later);
}<|eor|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 303 |
programmerhumor | Klausvd1 | e0q3ytm | <|sols|><|sot|>AI you say?<|eot|><|sol|>https://i.imgur.com/jOo627t.jpg<|eol|><|sor|>Mine has a GPS tracking algorithm that decides whether I have to present something in front of class<|eor|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 276 |
programmerhumor | BetaDecay121 | e0q1dai | <|sols|><|sot|>AI you say?<|eot|><|sol|>https://i.imgur.com/jOo627t.jpg<|eol|><|sor|>Most of these bad uses of the term AI are at least talking about a series of if statements, but to get the updates as smooth as possible would be one if statement. If computer is on DONT FUCKING UPDATE<|eor|><|sor|>[All we want is this again](https://i.imgur.com/mrrHQIU.png)
To get this now you have to cheat your way around it<|eor|><|sor|>Something about updating automatically overnight?<|eor|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 257 |
programmerhumor | AyrA_ch | e0q3bju | <|sols|><|sot|>AI you say?<|eot|><|sol|>https://i.imgur.com/jOo627t.jpg<|eol|><|sor|>Most of these bad uses of the term AI are at least talking about a series of if statements, but to get the updates as smooth as possible would be one if statement. If computer is on DONT FUCKING UPDATE<|eor|><|sor|>[All we want is this again](https://i.imgur.com/mrrHQIU.png)
To get this now you have to cheat your way around it<|eor|><|sor|>Something about updating automatically overnight?<|eor|><|sor|>or about installing when I shut down but not dictating how long I can run the device at once. I'm totally fine if it reminds me that there are updates every 12 or 24 hours.<|eor|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 247 |
programmerhumor | Baton793 | e0qj59f | <|sols|><|sot|>AI you say?<|eot|><|sol|>https://i.imgur.com/jOo627t.jpg<|eol|><|sor|>They used **coding** and **algorithms** to detect when youre working.<|eor|><|sor|>Deep machine learning blockchain based cloud coding algorithm to detect when you're working.<|eor|><|sor|>That's not AI, that's an if statement<|eor|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 234 |
programmerhumor | Limunaire | e0q1p9n | <|sols|><|sot|>AI you say?<|eot|><|sol|>https://i.imgur.com/jOo627t.jpg<|eol|><|sor|>Why the fuck do we need AI for this? Literally on restart/shutdown just ask if the user wants to install updates for next time they start up. It doesn't have to be convoluted. <|eor|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 197 |
programmerhumor | zanderkerbal | e0qc4ck | <|sols|><|sot|>AI you say?<|eot|><|sol|>https://i.imgur.com/jOo627t.jpg<|eol|><|sor|>The real problem comes in the hasUnsavedWork() method. For example, if I'm half done typing this comment on Reddit where it won't save, does that still count as doing work? Or if I'm-<|eor|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 121 |
programmerhumor | HardstuckRetard | e0qjyr5 | <|sols|><|sot|>AI you say?<|eot|><|sol|>https://i.imgur.com/jOo627t.jpg<|eol|><|sor|>They used **coding** and **algorithms** to detect when youre working.<|eor|><|sor|>Deep machine learning blockchain based cloud coding algorithm to detect when you're working.<|eor|><|sor|>That's not AI, that's an if statement<|eor|><|sor|>these esoteric languages are getting harder to read as i get older<|eor|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 108 |
programmerhumor | iMPose27 | 8i6w6m | <|sols|><|sot|>I feel like one of these books is misleading me<|eot|><|sol|>https://i.imgur.com/TOcRdNw.jpg<|eol|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 41,701 |
programmerhumor | TagJones | dype028 | <|sols|><|sot|>I feel like one of these books is misleading me<|eot|><|sol|>https://i.imgur.com/TOcRdNw.jpg<|eol|><|sor|>'in depth' probably extends 'in a nutshell', it's all covered in my book 'c# in heritance'<|eor|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 6,174 |
programmerhumor | CapnNausea | dypff2f | <|sols|><|sot|>I feel like one of these books is misleading me<|eot|><|sol|>https://i.imgur.com/TOcRdNw.jpg<|eol|><|sor|>Plot twist - the notepad contains the most info. <|eor|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 1,656 |
programmerhumor | tdox57 | dypc8zz | <|sols|><|sot|>I feel like one of these books is misleading me<|eot|><|sol|>https://i.imgur.com/TOcRdNw.jpg<|eol|><|sor|>What's the font size in both books? Thats the real question. <|eor|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 1,513 |
programmerhumor | 4E4145 | dypfqyc | <|sols|><|sot|>I feel like one of these books is misleading me<|eot|><|sol|>https://i.imgur.com/TOcRdNw.jpg<|eol|><|sor|>'in depth' probably extends 'in a nutshell', it's all covered in my book 'c# in heritance'<|eor|><|sor|>//see previous books
And that's all I have to fay about C# inheritance.
Fin<|eor|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 1,406 |
programmerhumor | shekurika | dypk14w | <|sols|><|sot|>I feel like one of these books is misleading me<|eot|><|sol|>https://i.imgur.com/TOcRdNw.jpg<|eol|><|sor|>What's the font size in both books? Thats the real question. <|eor|><|sor|>the page thickness is very important too<|eor|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 1,012 |
programmerhumor | HumunculiTzu | dypkhtr | <|sols|><|sot|>I feel like one of these books is misleading me<|eot|><|sol|>https://i.imgur.com/TOcRdNw.jpg<|eol|><|sor|>What's the font size in both books? Thats the real question. <|eor|><|sor|>the page thickness is very important too<|eor|><|sor|>It also depends on how big of a nutshell they are talking about.
Edit: [I think I found it](https://www.roadsideamerica.com/attract/images/mo/MOBRUpecan_sow.jpg)<|eor|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 936 |
programmerhumor | JmicIV | dypm03c | <|sols|><|sot|>I feel like one of these books is misleading me<|eot|><|sol|>https://i.imgur.com/TOcRdNw.jpg<|eol|><|sor|>Plot twist - the notepad contains the most info. <|eor|><|sor|>To be fair, if you take good consise notes and reference pages, you probably could cram the smaller book into the pad.<|eor|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 335 |
programmerhumor | CCAtAlvis | dypha6p | <|sols|><|sot|>I feel like one of these books is misleading me<|eot|><|sol|>https://i.imgur.com/TOcRdNw.jpg<|eol|><|sor|>I would go with C# in depth, its by the God himself!!<|eor|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 297 |
programmerhumor | HyperGamers | dypktdj | <|sols|><|sot|>I feel like one of these books is misleading me<|eot|><|sol|>https://i.imgur.com/TOcRdNw.jpg<|eol|><|sor|>I trust OReilly. When they say in a nut shell they mean fucking everything.<|eor|><|sor|>O rly?<|eor|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 266 |
programmerhumor | postedo | dypgw67 | <|sols|><|sot|>I feel like one of these books is misleading me<|eot|><|sol|>https://i.imgur.com/TOcRdNw.jpg<|eol|><|sor|>'in depth' probably extends 'in a nutshell', it's all covered in my book 'c# in heritance'<|eor|><|sor|>//see previous books
And that's all I have to fay about C# inheritance.
Fin<|eor|><|sor|>I think the proper way was
///<inheritdoc/>
<|eor|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 265 |
programmerhumor | TheCheeseCutter | dypnp8o | <|sols|><|sot|>I feel like one of these books is misleading me<|eot|><|sol|>https://i.imgur.com/TOcRdNw.jpg<|eol|><|sor|>'in depth' probably extends 'in a nutshell', it's all covered in my book 'c# in heritance'<|eor|><|sor|>//see previous books
And that's all I have to fay about C# inheritance.
Fin<|eor|><|sor|>//TODO: finish book
<|eor|><|sor|>>The rest of the book is left as an exercise to the reader.<|eor|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 247 |
programmerhumor | whywasitdownvoted | dyprdk7 | <|sols|><|sot|>I feel like one of these books is misleading me<|eot|><|sol|>https://i.imgur.com/TOcRdNw.jpg<|eol|><|sor|>[deleted]<|eor|><|sor|>I consider myself beyond amateur at C# and I still have no idea what activeX is.<|eor|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 241 |
programmerhumor | 3lRey | dypmvbo | <|sols|><|sot|>I feel like one of these books is misleading me<|eot|><|sol|>https://i.imgur.com/TOcRdNw.jpg<|eol|><|sor|>All of my "in-depth" books are small because they assume prior knowledge. I was amazed when, after going through calc 1 and 2 the book for 3 was a sliver of like 200 pages. My "advanced R tips and tricks" has about the same amount too. Those beginner books are always huge and lie by pretending it's "in a nutshell."<|eor|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 199 |
programmerhumor | ptrakk | dypkn0z | <|sols|><|sot|>I feel like one of these books is misleading me<|eot|><|sol|>https://i.imgur.com/TOcRdNw.jpg<|eol|><|sor|>What's the font size in both books? Thats the real question. <|eor|><|sor|>the page thickness is very important too<|eor|><|sor|>It also depends on how big of a nutshell they are talking about.
Edit: [I think I found it](https://www.roadsideamerica.com/attract/images/mo/MOBRUpecan_sow.jpg)<|eor|><|sor|>what compression are they using?<|eor|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 195 |
programmerhumor | _vOv_ | dypmqg1 | <|sols|><|sot|>I feel like one of these books is misleading me<|eot|><|sol|>https://i.imgur.com/TOcRdNw.jpg<|eol|><|sor|>'in depth' probably extends 'in a nutshell', it's all covered in my book 'c# in heritance'<|eor|><|sor|>//see previous books
And that's all I have to fay about C# inheritance.
Fin<|eor|><|sor|>//TODO: finish book
<|eor|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 154 |
programmerhumor | mamhilapinatapai | dypl6jv | <|sols|><|sot|>I feel like one of these books is misleading me<|eot|><|sol|>https://i.imgur.com/TOcRdNw.jpg<|eol|><|sor|>I trust OReilly. When they say in a nut shell they mean fucking everything.<|eor|><|sor|>O rly?<|eor|><|sor|>Ya Reilly <|eor|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 145 |
programmerhumor | SteveZissousGlock | dypmepj | <|sols|><|sot|>I feel like one of these books is misleading me<|eot|><|sol|>https://i.imgur.com/TOcRdNw.jpg<|eol|><|sor|>What's the font size in both books? Thats the real question. <|eor|><|sor|>the page thickness is very important too<|eor|><|sor|>It also depends on how big of a nutshell they are talking about.
Edit: [I think I found it](https://www.roadsideamerica.com/attract/images/mo/MOBRUpecan_sow.jpg)<|eor|><|sor|>what compression are they using?<|eor|><|sor|>Almond<|eor|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 143 |
programmerhumor | Fun-Context4181 | sn1ulj | <|sols|><|sot|>No<|eot|><|sol|>https://i.redd.it/fpqa619vdhg81.jpg<|eol|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 41,641 |
programmerhumor | FunGuyAstronaut | hw06qyv | <|sols|><|sot|>No<|eot|><|sol|>https://i.redd.it/fpqa619vdhg81.jpg<|eol|><|sor|>"It's like Facebook, Twitter, Netflix, Snapchat, and Amazon combined, with a little twist. You code it, I'll provide the idea, we'll split profits 95% me, 5% you, you'll be rich! Also you can host it, what do you say?"<|eor|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 1,680 |
programmerhumor | RigasTelRuun | hw0ehxr | <|sols|><|sot|>No<|eot|><|sol|>https://i.redd.it/fpqa619vdhg81.jpg<|eol|><|sor|>"It's like Facebook, Twitter, Netflix, Snapchat, and Amazon combined, with a little twist. You code it, I'll provide the idea, we'll split profits 95% me, 5% you, you'll be rich! Also you can host it, what do you say?"<|eor|><|sor|>I once had someone call me up basically asking to make YouTube. I asked what's the budget. Then I tried to explain that that wouldn't even cover the hosting and bandwidth of even a small project like this. I explained it calmly and professionally. He reacted like I can cast a curse on him and his family for seven generations.<|eor|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 1,056 |
programmerhumor | MissingRectum | hw05ho2 | <|sols|><|sot|>No<|eot|><|sol|>https://i.redd.it/fpqa619vdhg81.jpg<|eol|><|sor|>What do you do?
Im a backend developer
Oh so you could help me fix my phone!<|eor|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 747 |
programmerhumor | IMovedYourCheese | hw08rel | <|sols|><|sot|>No<|eot|><|sol|>https://i.redd.it/fpqa619vdhg81.jpg<|eol|><|sor|>It's a 50-50 split between:
"I have this amazing idea for an app. I just need someone to do the coding part. I'll handle everything else."
Or
"Can you hack my boyfriend's/girlfriend's phone/Facebook/email for me?"<|eor|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 695 |
programmerhumor | tuxman20 | hw0nm9e | <|sols|><|sot|>No<|eot|><|sol|>https://i.redd.it/fpqa619vdhg81.jpg<|eol|><|sor|>"It's like Facebook, Twitter, Netflix, Snapchat, and Amazon combined, with a little twist. You code it, I'll provide the idea, we'll split profits 95% me, 5% you, you'll be rich! Also you can host it, what do you say?"<|eor|><|sor|>I once had someone call me up basically asking to make YouTube. I asked what's the budget. Then I tried to explain that that wouldn't even cover the hosting and bandwidth of even a small project like this. I explained it calmly and professionally. He reacted like I can cast a curse on him and his family for seven generations.<|eor|><|sor|>For that price, I can give you my copy of JavaScript for Dummies<|eor|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 644 |
programmerhumor | Vikainen | hw0r2o3 | <|sols|><|sot|>No<|eot|><|sol|>https://i.redd.it/fpqa619vdhg81.jpg<|eol|><|sor|>Just say your rate: ie 250$/hr. That shuts everyone up<|eor|><|sor|>Well one time, at least for me, that didn't shut up everyone.
I was asked to fix a network issue on the company that had fired me a couple of weeks ago because the "expert" that replaced me was unable to discover the issue.
Comp:"We need your help, the network is down and the department can't figure it out!"
Me:" Ask the expert guy fix it!"
Comp:" He can't figure it out, please help!"
Me:"800/hour!"
Comp:"Ok deal, come to the office to sign the service contract before you start"
After 4/5 hours I was able to correct the firewall configuration and DMZ for the entire company.
I new the issue very well since the devices were old, every time that the power was out for more then 30 minutes they would return to fabric settings (the company never care to follow me advice to upgrade).
I knew it would take me around 2 hours to fix it but I took 4/5 hours just to get more money out of those cheapest bastard's.<|eor|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 442 |
programmerhumor | anunkneemouse | hw0898n | <|sols|><|sot|>No<|eot|><|sol|>https://i.redd.it/fpqa619vdhg81.jpg<|eol|><|sor|>What do you do?
Im a backend developer
Oh so you could help me fix my phone!<|eor|><|sor|>Told someone I'm in cloud infrastructure and they started telling me about a microphone issue on their laptop and asked for advice.<|eor|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 426 |
programmerhumor | darbtidder | hw0bihv | <|sols|><|sot|>No<|eot|><|sol|>https://i.redd.it/fpqa619vdhg81.jpg<|eol|><|sor|>Just say your rate: ie 250$/hr. That shuts everyone up<|eor|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 409 |
programmerhumor | suicidesalmon | hw066kl | <|sols|><|sot|>No<|eot|><|sol|>https://i.redd.it/fpqa619vdhg81.jpg<|eol|><|sor|>"Can you hack someone and do DDOS attacks?" ... Wh-why do you want me to do that in the first place, buddy.<|eor|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 406 |
programmerhumor | scalability | hw0txui | <|sols|><|sot|>No<|eot|><|sol|>https://i.redd.it/fpqa619vdhg81.jpg<|eol|><|sor|>How did I end up on this subreddit. Im not a programmer, I know nothing of programming. Yet Im here everyday.<|eor|><|sor|>> Im not a programmer, I know nothing of programming.
You'll fit right in<|eor|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 338 |
programmerhumor | nettlerise | hw0ea4f | <|sols|><|sot|>No<|eot|><|sol|>https://i.redd.it/fpqa619vdhg81.jpg<|eol|><|sor|>It's a 50-50 split between:
"I have this amazing idea for an app. I just need someone to do the coding part. I'll handle everything else."
Or
"Can you hack my boyfriend's/girlfriend's phone/Facebook/email for me?"<|eor|><|sor|>"Let's start our own crypto currency/NFT"<|eor|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 319 |
programmerhumor | deyheimler | hw0em5m | <|sols|><|sot|>No<|eot|><|sol|>https://i.redd.it/fpqa619vdhg81.jpg<|eol|><|sor|>How did I end up on this subreddit. Im not a programmer, I know nothing of programming. Yet Im here everyday.<|eor|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 313 |
programmerhumor | dashid | hw09ujd | <|sols|><|sot|>No<|eot|><|sol|>https://i.redd.it/fpqa619vdhg81.jpg<|eol|><|sor|>Probably. Can you afford my time?<|eor|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 208 |
programmerhumor | darbtidder | hw0ssyu | <|sols|><|sot|>No<|eot|><|sol|>https://i.redd.it/fpqa619vdhg81.jpg<|eol|><|sor|>Just say your rate: ie 250$/hr. That shuts everyone up<|eor|><|sor|>Well one time, at least for me, that didn't shut up everyone.
I was asked to fix a network issue on the company that had fired me a couple of weeks ago because the "expert" that replaced me was unable to discover the issue.
Comp:"We need your help, the network is down and the department can't figure it out!"
Me:" Ask the expert guy fix it!"
Comp:" He can't figure it out, please help!"
Me:"800/hour!"
Comp:"Ok deal, come to the office to sign the service contract before you start"
After 4/5 hours I was able to correct the firewall configuration and DMZ for the entire company.
I new the issue very well since the devices were old, every time that the power was out for more then 30 minutes they would return to fabric settings (the company never care to follow me advice to upgrade).
I knew it would take me around 2 hours to fix it but I took 4/5 hours just to get more money out of those cheapest bastard's.<|eor|><|sor|>Not really the same as a random person asking you to make an app or hack their dogs phone, but at least you got to make an easy 3.5k!<|eor|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 205 |
programmerhumor | Kiusito | hw0b67j | <|sols|><|sot|>No<|eot|><|sol|>https://i.redd.it/fpqa619vdhg81.jpg<|eol|><|sor|>What do you do?
Im a backend developer
Oh so you could help me fix my phone!<|eor|><|sor|>Told someone I'm in cloud infrastructure and they started telling me about a microphone issue on their laptop and asked for advice.<|eor|><|sor|>advice: buy a new microphone, a blue ice black can be good<|eor|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 202 |
programmerhumor | ColaEuphoria | hw14h7n | <|sols|><|sot|>No<|eot|><|sol|>https://i.redd.it/fpqa619vdhg81.jpg<|eol|><|sor|>"It's like Facebook, Twitter, Netflix, Snapchat, and Amazon combined, with a little twist. You code it, I'll provide the idea, we'll split profits 95% me, 5% you, you'll be rich! Also you can host it, what do you say?"<|eor|><|sor|>I once had someone call me up basically asking to make YouTube. I asked what's the budget. Then I tried to explain that that wouldn't even cover the hosting and bandwidth of even a small project like this. I explained it calmly and professionally. He reacted like I can cast a curse on him and his family for seven generations.<|eor|><|sor|>I was in a Skype group and someone asked if any of us knew programming. I'm thinking he's asking for some programming help so a few of us said yeah.
He then immediately rounds all of us up, dazed and confused, into a brand new Skype group to barrage us with information about his idea for a Bomberman clone.<|eor|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 194 |
programmerhumor | Dont__Grumpy__Stop | hw07h47 | <|sols|><|sot|>No<|eot|><|sol|>https://i.redd.it/fpqa619vdhg81.jpg<|eol|><|sor|>"Can you hack someone and do DDOS attacks?" ... Wh-why do you want me to do that in the first place, buddy.<|eor|><|sor|>I had a friend recently ask me if I could hack his wifes iPhone and get him her text messages.
Ahhhhhh.. <|eor|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 187 |
programmerhumor | Someones_Dream_Guy | hw0h329 | <|sols|><|sot|>No<|eot|><|sol|>https://i.redd.it/fpqa619vdhg81.jpg<|eol|><|sor|>What do you do?
Im a backend developer
Oh so you could help me fix my phone!<|eor|><|sor|>Best response is: "*Backend* developer", I can fix your server, not your phone.<|eor|><|sor|>\*calmly brings server over\* FINALLY >:)<|eor|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 177 |
programmerhumor | DEATHBYREGGAEHORN | hw0c14r | <|sols|><|sot|>No<|eot|><|sol|>https://i.redd.it/fpqa619vdhg81.jpg<|eol|><|sor|>Oh you're in tech! Heres my super big brain startup idea- (proceeds to excitedly describe something that exists and is commonplace like libraries or Google search)
You should quit your job so we can work on this and get rich!<|eor|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 164 |
programmerhumor | NikhilB09 | 11tr3jn | <|sols|><|sot|>This should do the trick<|eot|><|sol|>https://i.redd.it/qlzssa9fecoa1.jpg<|eol|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 41,624 |
programmerhumor | fliguana | jckacaw | <|sols|><|sot|>This should do the trick<|eot|><|sol|>https://i.redd.it/qlzssa9fecoa1.jpg<|eol|><|sor|>Off by one<|eor|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 8,913 |
programmerhumor | tilcica | jckagqg | <|sols|><|sot|>This should do the trick<|eot|><|sol|>https://i.redd.it/qlzssa9fecoa1.jpg<|eol|><|sor|>Off by one<|eor|><|sor|>2 if we include the one he said himself
or 3 if we also include the one in the code<|eor|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 3,568 |
programmerhumor | NonCombat | jckaqpj | <|sols|><|sot|>This should do the trick<|eot|><|sol|>https://i.redd.it/qlzssa9fecoa1.jpg<|eol|><|sor|>Ehh, "Sorry babu" isn't gonna work. She wanted "Sorry Babu".<|eor|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 3,463 |
programmerhumor | rull3211 | jcke8sx | <|sols|><|sot|>This should do the trick<|eot|><|sol|>https://i.redd.it/qlzssa9fecoa1.jpg<|eol|><|sor|>Who da fuq defines a loopvariable outside of the loop<|eor|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 2,058 |
programmerhumor | LonesomeHeideltraut | jcke48d | <|sols|><|sot|>This should do the trick<|eot|><|sol|>https://i.redd.it/qlzssa9fecoa1.jpg<|eol|><|sor|>Please declare x within the for loop. I cannot merge this code smell into production. Sorry.<|eor|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 1,632 |
programmerhumor | JonathisV | jckbwb1 | <|sols|><|sot|>This should do the trick<|eot|><|sol|>https://i.redd.it/qlzssa9fecoa1.jpg<|eol|><|sor|>Ehh, "Sorry babu" isn't gonna work. She wanted "Sorry Babu".<|eor|><|sor|>Pretty sure what she wanted was "it".<|eor|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 1,419 |
programmerhumor | BelinCan | jckfsfo | <|sols|><|sot|>This should do the trick<|eot|><|sol|>https://i.redd.it/qlzssa9fecoa1.jpg<|eol|><|sor|>Off by one<|eor|><|sor|>2 if we include the one he said himself
or 3 if we also include the one in the code<|eor|><|sor|>Ah, pedantry... so relaxing on a Friday.<|eor|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 1,364 |
programmerhumor | rmflow | jckkp4t | <|sols|><|sot|>This should do the trick<|eot|><|sol|>https://i.redd.it/qlzssa9fecoa1.jpg<|eol|><|sor|>Who da fuq defines a loopvariable outside of the loop<|eor|><|sor|>ex C programmers<|eor|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 840 |
programmerhumor | That-Row-3038 | jckah2i | <|sols|><|sot|>This should do the trick<|eot|><|sol|>https://i.redd.it/qlzssa9fecoa1.jpg<|eol|><|sor|>First thing someone messages you is sorry babu? Must be a very popular person<|eor|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 716 |
programmerhumor | PM_ME_BAD_ALGORITHMS | jckgxrg | <|sols|><|sot|>This should do the trick<|eot|><|sol|>https://i.redd.it/qlzssa9fecoa1.jpg<|eol|><|sor|>1. This will print it 1001 times since the iterator starts at 0 and the condition is lower OR EQUAL
2. If the only purpose of x is to be used as an iterator, you should declare it within the loop
No wonder she left you.
​
/s<|eor|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 640 |
programmerhumor | MarkWantsToQuit | jckj1oc | <|sols|><|sot|>This should do the trick<|eot|><|sol|>https://i.redd.it/qlzssa9fecoa1.jpg<|eol|><|sor|>Please declare x within the for loop. I cannot merge this code smell into production. Sorry.<|eor|><|sor|>Literally the first thing I noticed and immediately agitated me. I think I may have issues <|eor|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 342 |
programmerhumor | altermeetax | jckpig5 | <|sols|><|sot|>This should do the trick<|eot|><|sol|>https://i.redd.it/qlzssa9fecoa1.jpg<|eol|><|sor|>Who da fuq defines a loopvariable outside of the loop<|eor|><|sor|>ex C programmers<|eor|><|sor|>That hasn't been necessary in C for 24 years<|eor|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 297 |
programmerhumor | ShadyG | jckw1vv | <|sols|><|sot|>This should do the trick<|eot|><|sol|>https://i.redd.it/qlzssa9fecoa1.jpg<|eol|><|sor|>Off by one<|eor|><|sor|>Meets the requirements tho. Saying it 1001 times means he has said it 1000 times.<|eor|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 276 |
programmerhumor | NonCombat | jckcyoz | <|sols|><|sot|>This should do the trick<|eot|><|sol|>https://i.redd.it/qlzssa9fecoa1.jpg<|eol|><|sor|>Ehh, "Sorry babu" isn't gonna work. She wanted "Sorry Babu".<|eor|><|sor|>Pretty sure what she wanted was "it".<|eor|><|sor|>Ha well you are correct!<|eor|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 273 |
programmerhumor | tilcica | jckiolw | <|sols|><|sot|>This should do the trick<|eot|><|sol|>https://i.redd.it/qlzssa9fecoa1.jpg<|eol|><|sor|>Off by one<|eor|><|sor|>2 if we include the one he said himself
or 3 if we also include the one in the code<|eor|><|sor|>Ah, pedantry... so relaxing on a Friday.<|eor|><|sor|>be sure to guess how she's counting it or she's breaking up with you good luck :)<|eor|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 256 |
programmerhumor | Interest-Desk | jcl43lt | <|sols|><|sot|>This should do the trick<|eot|><|sol|>https://i.redd.it/qlzssa9fecoa1.jpg<|eol|><|sor|>Off by one<|eor|><|sor|>There are two hard problems in computer science.
Cache invalidation, naming things and off-by-one errors.<|eor|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 242 |
programmerhumor | TravisJungroth | jcksfa9 | <|sols|><|sot|>This should do the trick<|eot|><|sol|>https://i.redd.it/qlzssa9fecoa1.jpg<|eol|><|sor|>Who da fuq defines a loopvariable outside of the loop<|eor|><|sor|>ex C programmers<|eor|><|sor|>That hasn't been necessary in C for 24 years<|eor|><|sor|>Some people are old<|eor|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 240 |
programmerhumor | Good_Smile | jckisww | <|sols|><|sot|>This should do the trick<|eot|><|sol|>https://i.redd.it/qlzssa9fecoa1.jpg<|eol|><|sor|>What if she's case sensitive<|eor|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 232 |
programmerhumor | BigNutBoi2137 | jckfciv | <|sols|><|sot|>This should do the trick<|eot|><|sol|>https://i.redd.it/qlzssa9fecoa1.jpg<|eol|><|sor|>`print("\n".join(["Sorry Babu"]*1000))`
Take care of your fingers, lads. Type less.<|eor|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 207 |
programmerhumor | Valalcar | jckv7zr | <|sols|><|sot|>This should do the trick<|eot|><|sol|>https://i.redd.it/qlzssa9fecoa1.jpg<|eol|><|sor|>First thing someone messages you is sorry babu? Must be a very popular person<|eor|><|sor|>I have a close friend that constantly deletes all her conversations. Every conversation she has looks like this.
Once we were returning on the same car, and she drunkenly sent an audio message to a common friend making plans, deleted, and next day was asking me what she said because she had no idea what they were talking about<|eor|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 198 |
programmerhumor | Dareyos | 138exid | <|sols|><|sot|>Helicopter Helicopter<|eot|><|sol|>https://i.redd.it/p433hvmxi0ya1.jpg<|eol|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 41,566 |
programmerhumor | Ordsmed | jiy0k94 | <|sols|><|sot|>Helicopter Helicopter<|eot|><|sol|>https://i.redd.it/p433hvmxi0ya1.jpg<|eol|><|sor|>A GameDev from Paradox replied saying (paraphrased) that in a similar vein, asteroids on a collision-course with planets in Stellaris are actually rocky-looking ships with no weapons. Since all ships in the game needs to be owned by a empire, there also a hidden "Asteroid Empire" responsible for sending their "weaponless ships" out to "attack" random planets \^\^'
​
EDIT: Found the tweet again.
https://twitter.com/CheerfulGoth/status/1654254300829237249<|eor|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 5,845 |
programmerhumor | Void_0000 | jiy22m8 | <|sols|><|sot|>Helicopter Helicopter<|eot|><|sol|>https://i.redd.it/p433hvmxi0ya1.jpg<|eol|><|sor|>Bethesda: "Really, a helicopter is just a mechanical dragon."
In case you were wondering, the vertibirds in fallout 4 are reskinned dragons from skyrim. Actually, the entirety of fallout 4 is reskinned skyrim. The game considers a nuke to be magic.<|eor|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 4,771 |
programmerhumor | Bjorn_Hellgate | jiy3cbx | <|sols|><|sot|>Helicopter Helicopter<|eot|><|sol|>https://i.redd.it/p433hvmxi0ya1.jpg<|eol|><|sor|>Bethesda: "Really, a helicopter is just a mechanical dragon."
In case you were wondering, the vertibirds in fallout 4 are reskinned dragons from skyrim. Actually, the entirety of fallout 4 is reskinned skyrim. The game considers a nuke to be magic.<|eor|><|sor|>That is why crashing vertibirds sometimes go straight for the player, because downed dragons do that in skyrim<|eor|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 2,824 |
programmerhumor | Void_0000 | jiy2cyk | <|sols|><|sot|>Helicopter Helicopter<|eot|><|sol|>https://i.redd.it/p433hvmxi0ya1.jpg<|eol|><|sor|>A GameDev from Paradox replied saying (paraphrased) that in a similar vein, asteroids on a collision-course with planets in Stellaris are actually rocky-looking ships with no weapons. Since all ships in the game needs to be owned by a empire, there also a hidden "Asteroid Empire" responsible for sending their "weaponless ships" out to "attack" random planets \^\^'
​
EDIT: Found the tweet again.
https://twitter.com/CheerfulGoth/status/1654254300829237249<|eor|><|sor|>I've seen those in game before, I also think it's funny that the asteroids register as having FTL capability.
One of these days they're going to reveal that it was, in fact, actually a real empire hidden somewhere strapping hyperdrives to space rocks and launching them in the general direction of inhabited planets in what seems to be a strange version of space golf.<|eor|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 2,309 |
programmerhumor | Void_0000 | jiy3r1d | <|sols|><|sot|>Helicopter Helicopter<|eot|><|sol|>https://i.redd.it/p433hvmxi0ya1.jpg<|eol|><|sor|>Bethesda: "Really, a helicopter is just a mechanical dragon."
In case you were wondering, the vertibirds in fallout 4 are reskinned dragons from skyrim. Actually, the entirety of fallout 4 is reskinned skyrim. The game considers a nuke to be magic.<|eor|><|sor|>That is why crashing vertibirds sometimes go straight for the player, because downed dragons do that in skyrim<|eor|><|sor|>Oh my fucking god. That explains so much.
I thought I was just ridiculously unlucky.<|eor|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 2,012 |
programmerhumor | recycledbits | jixtq1j | <|sols|><|sot|>Helicopter Helicopter<|eot|><|sol|>https://i.redd.it/p433hvmxi0ya1.jpg<|eol|><|sor|>Bethesda: flying NPC with an oversized propeller beanie hat.<|eor|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 2,007 |
programmerhumor | zalurker | jiy7yba | <|sols|><|sot|>Helicopter Helicopter<|eot|><|sol|>https://i.redd.it/p433hvmxi0ya1.jpg<|eol|><|sor|>Gents. It's not just normal games. When the Australian Army was evaluating attack helicopters - part of the requirements was that the support package included a flight simulator.
The US team that was proposing they choose the Apache took that requirement in their stride and even updated the simulator to show local wildlife. Specifically kangaroos. One worry was that the helicopter could startle a herd and alert any enemy it was trying to attack.
The enigeers decided the simplest way to handle that was to change the skins of infantry and assign them specific behavior protocols. Neat and simple to deploy. Worked perfectly.
The first time they ran a demonstration of the updated simulator to some Australian officers, they demonstrated the added feature, and had the pilot buzz a herd of Kangaroos.
The Generals were very impressed by the realistic way the herd scattered. And even more impressed when The kangaroos regrouped and shot the helicopter down with surface to air missiles.
They had forgotten to disarm the 'soldiers'...<|eor|><|eols|><|endoftext|> | 1,667 |
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