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So I have a large collection of books that I often reread. I love them all very much. My favourite series is noughts and crosses books. My parents often make me lend books to people I barely know and sometimes the people take ages to return it and if they do, its often a bit damaged. The other day my parents asked me t... | NTA. If your parents want to lend books to random people all willy nilly then they need to acquire their own copies of said books to lend out. You're under no obligation to share your possessions with persons you hardly know, especially knowing those things are likely to come back damaged. ###### |
I'm (21M) quarantining with my university flatmates. 3 girls (all 20F) and 2 other guys (20M, 21M).
One of the guys, we'll call Sam (21M) looks like the typical "neckbeard". He's largely overweight, wears anime T-Shirts, unkempt facial hair and has spots
However, he only *looks* like the stereotype. He's not creepy... | NTA. If your idea of "fun" is putting down other people behind their backs, there is a 10/10 chance that you suck ass. You did the right thing my dude. ###### |
My stepdaughter (24) is moving in with her Bf this weekend and when she asked for help moving, I said nothing about it being my birthday because let’s be real- there’s a pandemic and I’m not going to go out and party or anything. But we would have to get up super early and drive three hours to help her move and then th... | NTA. If your husband keeps pressuring you for it, gently remind him that you’d much rather have some time for yourself on your birthday rather than move stuff. But the way he keeps pressuring makes me wonder if he has something planned? ###### |
Ok...so, my girl and I are sitting on the couch watching some TV. She's on her phone wearing yoga pants and a Tshirt, basically laying on her stomach with her ass right next to me and her legs across my lap. I'm playing my Switch chilling.
Then suddenly she lets rip a massive ass clapping fart, and it smells fucking ... | NTA. If your girlfriend is self-conscious about how you react to her farting in your face, then maybe she shouldn't fart in your face. Totally gross. ###### |
I'll start by explaining the situation, my mother is a health nut who also happens to have celiac disease. I don't have celiac disease and don't currently follow the diet. My mother insists on me following it even though gluten free food is more expensive and tastes bland in comparison. Her reasoning is that apparently... | NTA. If your dad can safely prepare non-gf foods without it affecting your mom, and you don’t have a gluten intolerance, there’s no reason for you to eat gluten-free. ###### |
My boyfriend and I, both 24, have been together ten years now. He’s my best friend and I love him. Since the beginning of our relationship I’ve explicitly said I do not want kids, and he’s always gone along with it. I practically brought up my siblings due to my mum being a drug addict, and don’t want kids myself.
A ... | NTA. If you’ve been explicitly clear this whole time, then he’s been lying to you when he’s gone along with it. I’d bet that he’s also told his parents a different story, given their reaction. He’s been telling himself that when you say “never,” you mean “not right now.” ###### |
My roommate (22F) and I (20M) have been roommates for about six months. One of the things that was agreed upon when I moved in with her was that I don’t want anyone else, including her, in my room. I grew up in a household where my privacy wasn’t respected, and I would routinely get home to my parents tearing through m... | NTA. If you’ve actually caught her twice she’s probably been in more times than that unfortunately. Living with roommates, your bedroom is your only truly private space.
I agree with other posters about installing a real lock either through a locksmith or buying the external hardware for a padlock and doing it yours... |
I can’t exactly remember how it got to this but my mom and I were talking about the house were living in and she said “And then when you move out I can come live with you” and I said “Oh I don’t really want you to live with me” and she got mad and was like “Do you not care about me and want to take care of me?” And lik... | NTA. If you’re close to moving out, there’s a reason she didn’t bring this up until now. She knew she would have been shut down and that she’d have to figure out other arrangements. If you’re younger, she’s unfairly trying to pressure you into a commitment you’re not remotely prepared for. Either way, she’s banking on... |
He was in a zoom meeting and wanted his wine refilled. I was busy doing things on my computer as well, so he just snapped his fingers at me as if I was a waitress and pointed at his wine glass. Like I get he couldn't talk in his meeting but he couldn't have just muted his mic for a second to ask me to get some more win... | NTA. If you’re able to DRINK on a call, it can’t be too important that you can’t take the few seconds to mute it. ###### |
(I'm not a story teller like some here, so sorry if this is disorganized or boring.)
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Hello Reddit. Tomorrow is my (f/28) birthday. I wasn't planning on doing anything this year because it's my first sober birthday (I quit drinking 9 months ago) and I try to avoid parties since everyone usually drinks at ... | NTA. If you're within a year of sobriety and your friends are aware of that, they're not friends if they want you to go to a pub for your birthday. Your sobriety is way more important than their preferences in food. And regardless of the sobriety, your birthday is about you. You get to decide where and when you want t... |
This happened today at 7am, i got woken up by a huge scandal going on in the aparment above mine so i went to check it out.
The tenants are two tourist girls that rented the apartment from airbnb and a strong weed smell is coming out from their door. My other neighbors are there knocking on their door and shouting but... | NTA. If you're stupid enough to smoke where it's illegal you get what you get. If they hadn't been hotboxing the entire bloody building nobody would have cared. ###### |
Hey folks, so I'm at a fork in the road here and have to make a decision. \[Re-phrasing some things so this post doesn't get removed again\]
My brother is in his mid-30s and recently applied to become a police officer. I'm not going to say where since this would be a dead give-away of who I am. When he first told my f... | NTA. If you're concerned for the safety of others, you should always tell the truth. If they choose not to hire him based on your reference, they probably won't tell him that was why. You WBTA if you gave him a false good character reference, in this case. ###### |
Ordered a custom product, told them what I wanted down to the design and colors and paid a design fee. It was a custom gift for my wife and another one for my daughter. A month after it came, they listed the product I had them make for my daughter as a buying option for everyone visiting their site using a photo of my ... | NTA. If you were expecting this to be custom, it should be custom and only yours ###### |
Hey guys! This is my first time posting on AITA so please bear with me....
First a bit of context... I was planning on getting married this October but have no idea if that is still going to happen due to the lockdown that's going on
So I (29yo F) was on the phone to my mother this morning discussing plans for a "Vir... | NTA. If you wedding will be on a Saturday, your mother can plan something for the Sunday. Or the weekend before. Or the weekend after. Out of curiosity, what's HER wedding story? Would she have allowed her day to get upstaged by everyone else? ###### |
I was unloading my groceries and found a devotional booklet and a note from my instacart person encouraging me to find Jesus in these dark times.
My order was otherwise just fine, and I won’t change my tip, but I don’t I don’t know how assholish I would be leaving a low star review for the literature. I don’t want t... | NTA. If you wanted that sort of crap you’d have asked for it or sought it out. ###### |
Our whole relationship is great except for our bedroom situation. We haven’t been intimate in several months and I don’t really show off my body to him anymore.
All of my pajama clothes were in the wash and they weren’t fully dry and I had literally nothing else to wear other than stuff that’s not comfortable to slee... | NTA. If you used to do it, it shouldn’t be an issue. However, I wonder about the lack of bedroom stuff and his reaction... ###### |
My family is beyond angry with me for this purchase and I want to know if I am wrong for it. If I am wrong, I will return it. I (26F) still live at home with my parents and younger sister (23F). My parents are currently not working but still being paid by their jobs and my sister is a student. Our finances have stayed... | NTA. If you specifically worked and saved up to purchase this purse, there is no reason to feel guilty. You worked hard for it. You're allowed to enjoy luxury items. It was your money not theirs, they don't get a say in your finances since you're already pulling your weight. Keep the bag and enjoy it. ###### |
I [30F] was at a bar with friends back when that was still a thing and was approached by a past hookup who was clearly still interested. I told him that I wasn’t and he left us alone after that, but one of my friends (childhood friend of BF) was super offended that I hadn’t disclosed that I’d had a boyfriend when I tur... | NTA. If you say you have a boyfriend, they'll keep pushing. I think many of us women have experienced it. Turning them down outright let's them know they have no chance. ###### |
AITA for removing the tip until my things are delivered and then tipping the deliverer?
So, I need a lot of things delivered to me as I can't go out due to chemo and the fact that I'm currently immunocompromised has me needing a lot of things that I pay to have delivered. What I do to get my things delivered faster is... | NTA. If you promise a $50 tip through the app and deliver a $50 cash tip then the driver is getting even more than they were promised. And these apps generally treat their drivers pretty terribly so to hell with giving them any more money than you have to. ###### |
Edit: by toilet I mean toilet bowl rim mainly
My(23) boyfriend (30) of 5 months is pretty great and has visited my apartment pretty frequently as of late. He generally picks up after himself ok enough, there is one hug pet peeve that he is aggrrivating. When he uses my toilet ,he regularly leaves pee under the lid ... | NTA. If you period dripped on the seat at his house he’d expect you to clean it up. It’s not your fault, and a medical condition, but I bet 1000% he’d want you to clean it up. ###### |
Some background: I come from India but Im attending a college in the UK after accepting a scholarship.
So this started 7 months ago, so I told my family that I after I finish college I'm going to stay in the UK, I half heartedly thought they were going to be supportive but knowing my culture I knew that they were most... | NTA. If you need advice if things seem they might escalate or if you have any concerns, please call Karma Nirvana. They are a UK charity for exactly this sort of thing. ###### |
I have a dog, she's 6. And very healthy. Potty trained. So she never makes any messes. Unless I'm gone for long hours which is understandable. When you gotta go, you gotta go. I clean it up. No big deal.
I walk her 3 times a day. Morning. Afternoon. Evening. So she can use the bathroom and get a lil bit of exercise. ... | NTA. If you hired a plumber to fix your toilet and instead they clogged it and flooded your bathroom, would you pay them for that?
She didn't even feed your dog. She doesn't deserve to stay in business with that sort of work ethic, particularly since she's working with animals. ###### |
My dad wanted to take us all out for something, he said it was a surprise. For the past week I've had covid symptoms and I came down with a 100° fever yesterday. I told my dad that I wasn't feeling up to leaving the house and he kept trying to make me leave along with my siblings. I snapped and screamed at him and this... | NTA. If you have COVID symptoms you absolutely should not be leaving the house, and neither should they, since they are in such close contact with you. ###### |
When my roommate and I first moved in together we went and I adopted two cats. I paid for adoption fees then and still pay vet bills now.
The two cats are siblings and are now a bonded pair since it’s been a nearly a year or so now. She plans on moving out once our lease is up and going to college in another city. Ha... | NtA. If you have been financially responsible for them the whole time, they're your cats.
If they are as obviously bonded as you say, then shes TA for wanting to break them apart. ###### |
I am a 16 year old male. I live with my joint family which consists of my mom (40) and dad (41) grandfather (68) grandmother (68) great grandmother (91) and also my great grand father who passed away last year at the age of 96.
We live in a very small house with respect to the number of my family members.
Hence, I d... | NTA. If you have any money saved up, or any friends that'd take you in, move out ASAP. Because your grandparents aren't getting any younger and will only need more help as time progresses. ###### |
So a coworker of mine and I happen to share a lot of the same friends. Today we were talking about some of our friends, and she starts describing this one friend she has. He sounds familiar so I say that he sounds familiar, I have a similar friend and start describing him thinking it might be the same person. I said he... | NTA. If you guys are trying to figure out if you're talking about the same person, then it makes sense to include major physical descriptors like race. That doesn't make you racist.
It's not like you said he was smart and funny for being a black person (at least I hope that's not what you said). That would be racist... |
Hi- I have a sister who is a few years older than me, and has wanted kids since she was a kid. She wants a small litter of them and is a primary school teacher, and I think one day she will make a great mum.
I, on the other hand, do not like kids. Full stop. I never want to be pregnant, I don't find baby videos cute... | NTA. If you don’t want to babysit, then don’t babysit. ###### |
Looking for some other opinions to help with my perspective.
My wife saw an area rug she liked on Craigslist. It was described as in good condition and was close to where we lived. The seller was asking $40 and my wife called and asked to come see it. The seller was about 10 minutes away, and my wife arranged a time t... | NTA. If you don’t like the the price or the condition, don’t buy. You don’t get to unilaterally decide on a new price without the seller’s consent. It was a dick move for the seller to not be there at the agreed on time, but it doesn’t justify theft.
Did your wife bother to call the seller when she got there? ###### |
So a few days ago, one of my friends (who lives less than a half a mile away from me) sent me a picture of the sky because it was super dark. And here is the ensuring conversation verbatim:
Friend: it's going to storm really bad
Me: I don't think it'll be that bad but I'm still excited
F: dude go fuck yourself
M: ???
... | NTA. If you could't be excited about anything that gives other people anxiety you couldn't be excited about ANYTHING. ###### |
My wife wants us to compete in a weight loss competition, so it can make it easier for her.
The thing is, I can’t healthily lose any weight. I’m just 5 pounds from being underweight. I still do work out to become more fit, but I don’t lose weight.
My wife is slightly overweight. She wants to come down to a healthie... | NTA. If you are already so close to being underweight, there is no reason at all for you to try and compete. Perhaps come up with a fun alternative to help her with her weight loss, like instead of a competition, you can both workout together three times a week or cook healthy dinners together. It sounds like she migh... |
Me [18M] and my girlfriend [18F] have been dating for 2 and a half years. We trust and love each other a ton. I have nude photos of her on my phone. My twin sister [18F] a few days ago snooped through my phone and found the pictures. I'm angry at her for invading me and my girlfriend's privacy, and feel guilty for not ... | NTA. If want to know I'd my gf/bf was speaking like that about others ###### |
I was dating my wife for 8 years before I proposed. We lived together for most of that time and it just didn't feel like it would make any difference. Finally I proposed and just a month after the proposal we found out that she was pregnant. With that discovery we decided to postpone plans to get married until after he... | NTA. If things happened as you've said your MiL cannot be left in charge of a child. They are unpredictable and can throw tantrums or be upset. Is her reaction to a tantrum in a mall going to be to just walk away again?
Your wife is on your side, if only just. On some level she must know about her mother's questionab... |
My fiancé and I were supposed to get married at the end of this month, obviously it’s been moved. We’re now planning on the beginning of January of 2021.
I’m Asian-American, half Chinese half Japanese, but no one in my family has lived in Asia since my maternal grandmother. And she’s the only one. Everyone else direc... | NTA. If they're like this now, can you imagine what they'd be like around your future mixed children?? If he cannot stand up for you and have the courage to tell them that they better knock it off or it's no contact, then I don't know, but that would be a deal-breaker for me. (experience with my white father and Asian... |
I logged my mom's Netflix account on my dad's house (they're divorced) so that me and my brother could watch a movie.
Today I went to the living room and my dad's friends were watching Netflix in my mom's profile and didn't stop even after a told them that.
I called my mom and told her what was going on and she tol... | NTA. If they're divorced, your dad should get his own account. ###### |
Hey guys! I F(21) have a very strained relationship with my father. Last year I walked in on him having an affair in our home. Prior to that he had been unfaithful to my mom on some other occasions (3 times total). After the incident during my freshman year of high school I made it clear to him if he did it again, he’d... | NTA. If they wanted to keep it between them and their marriage they shouldn’t have involved you at all. But since you witnessed the affair, and since you are their child, it now becomes your business. You’re allowed to have an opinion on it. ###### |
So I live in a small rented apartment with two other women. We don't hang out much and more live together for convenience. Recently I've started noticing that my milk is running out faster than I've been drinking it. I'm vegan so I drink dairy free oat milk. I'm pretty confident that I know who it is but every time I c... | NTA. If they say they’re not drinking your milk they should have nothing to worry about right? ###### |
So as a kid I (22f) was “the black sheep” aka I was the emo that everyone in the family made an effort to avoid and that carried on into my adult life (to a lesser extent) but I still wasn’t invited to things like weddings and family gatherings (I was however invited to go out clubbing).
Two years ago I’d invited all ... | NTA. If they carry on send them the screen shot you were sent and ask them why would they be invited to a dungeon wedding full of scary music and lettus as they clearly hate that. 2 faced people are the worst. ###### |
I’m sure I’d be TA here but I wanted to double check because I’m an idiot.
I gave my girlfriends nephew $800 for his class trip. The trip cost around $2400USD & I felt generous after hearing his parents were struggling to meet the monthly payments. I gave it to him in private and really adore this kid.
Now, his c... | NTA. If they aren’t classy and decent enough to give it back or ask what you would like done with the money now that the trip has been canceled, you are well within your right to ask for it back. ###### |
I have 6 sisters and they always want to group text. 3 are nurses and we have a niece who is a EMT so they are constantly texting about medical stuff. They share pictures that are gruesome. When they aren't doing that it's gossip about their high school classmates. My sisters graduated when I was in elementary school. ... | NTA. If they are sharing gruesome pics from work without written patient consent, it’s also illegal. ###### |
I’m in charge of a team of people (industrial designers, if it matters) whose jobs involve daily meetings with others in the company to collaborate on projects and usually two or three clients to touch base on progress.
I jumped onto a client discussion recently to check in on a large project, and to my surprise foun... | NTA. If they are meeting among themselves I believe it would be okay for them to be a little lax in dress, but when meeting clients they should be dressed as they normally would be in person. It does not matter that the client knows they are working from home. It shows the client that they only dress the part for work... |
Divorce is weird. One part of our settlement was subscription services such as Amazon Prime, Netflix, etc.
I had to legally maintain them for 6 months. I don’t know if I was being taken advantage of, but it’s far too late now. Yesterday, when the 6 months were up, I cancelled every single subscription service I had ... | NTA. If these services were that important to her, she had six months to save up the money to purchase them for herself. You did nothing wrong. ###### |
My (34F) boyfriend (35M) and I have been having a really rocky time in the relationship. I planned a nice treat for a picnic date that involved champagne and a spread of really nice food— as in, I spent an ungodly amount on cheese and charcuterie for us to enjoy.
He said that he would probably give some of it to his ... | NTA. If there's food left over after the date then sharing it with his friends is NBD, but to do it beforehand seems inconsiderate to say the least. It sounds like he's telling you what his priorities are. ###### |
I was scrolling through the hub, when I saw this video that caught my attention. When I clicked on the video and saw the face, I was surprised. This person looked exactly like my friend from university. I didn’t want to jump to conclusions because it would be mad weird if I came up to her and said I saw her in this vid... | NTA. If there was a video of me out there, I would want to know. Make it clear that you are not judging, it is completely her business and you're not telling anyone about it. You are only bringing it up because you don't think she is aware of the video, and if the roles were reversed you would want someone to tell you... |
My cat eats meals and only gets a certain amount of food a day. He acts like he’s starving all the time. I even brought him to the vet and the vet said he was the perfect weight and he wasn’t sick, he just likes to eat. And if he ate more he would be fat.
My family thinks that the cat is not getting enough to eat. Th... | NTA. If the vet says he’s healthy keep doing what you’re doing.
There are cats that you can leave food out for and they will eat only when hungry... and then you have chonko cats who feel the need to eat everything in front of them.
Your cat meows and cries because he KNOWS someone will feed him. They’re reinforcing... |
This argument happened over FaceTime but it was pretty big and my dad is furious at me and has been sending angry text messages so I’m taking it here.
I (32M) was FaceTiming my dad (57M) and his girlfriend (27F) on Tuesday when they surprised me that my dad had proposed. I don’t like my dads girlfriend and to be hone... | NTA. If the girlfriend can shamelessly publicly post like that after all they’ve done, then she deserves the post to be exposed like that. People who can cheat that badly don’t deserve the benefit of doubt.
10 years?? Doesn’t that mean that she was 17 and your dad was 47??? ###### |
i like to play guitar a lot. lately, ive been playing it more than usual because ive had time off. im not sure why, but my girlfriend isnt the biggest fan of me playing. maybe she just things im bad at it lol but usually when im playing, she’s upstairs anyway. i know its not because she wants me to spend time with her ... | NTA. If someone you're in a relationship has no problem treating your possessions like trash, you shouldn't be in a relationship with them.
Also, if she never wants to spend time with you anyway and would rather just use her phone, why are you two even dating? ###### |
I got a Johnny Walker black label I usually share with people that don't like whiskey or wanna mix it with coke.
I currently live overseas so I only have a couple of bottles of a bourbon I particularly like. It's very expensive where I live and I don't know when I'll be able to go back to the States to get more.
WIBT... | NTA. If someone told me this is super expensive liquor and I don’t share, I’d shrug and say ok. Ok well I would maybe ask if I could try the tinsiest sip to say I’ve tried it, but I wouldn’t be pissed if that was a no. Alcohol is expensive!! Though if you offer and she says “yeah with coke” and then you say “oh you ca... |
My daughter (preteen age) loves this TV show (I’m going to be vague for anonymity) and I applied on a whim. We got invited on the show and did some fun competitions for an episode. We didn’t win but my daughter still talks about it all the time.
My daughters father is not very involved. He shows up with ridiculous pre... | NTA. If someone isn't involved with the kid, they aren't involved in decisions regarding the kid. It sounds like your daughter enjoyed it and she is happy about the experience. That's the only person's opinion who should matter in this case. ###### |
Sorry this is long ... Anyway, I was once happily married with a newborn baby.
My sister on the other hand is a heroin addict and found herself evicted from her house and child services found her children malnourished and emaciated after having missed 92 days of school so they were taken from her.
So I took her into m... | NTA. If she’s so “changed” she should be reaching out to you begging for forgiveness! ###### |
During high school, I (F) was experimenting with my style and found that I was more comfortable in men's clothing. I started wearing suites a lot and love colorful ties and bow ties. My Mum is super conservative and obsessed with gender roles and went a while where she couldn't look at me without crying. When I decided... | NTA. If she's hurt by who you are, she's the problem. You shouldn't have to comprimise. You're not prodding her into accepting you, she's trying to change you. ###### |
I have a friend who i found out some time ago to be an anti-vaxxer and unvaccinated, believing that vaccination causes autism and that they dont want "chemicals" in her future kids. Ive tried over multiple occasions to tell them that these beliefs are not true when the subject is brought up by them, but they never list... | NTA. If she works in the facility near babies and kids I think you should report to her place of work that she admired to not have been vaccinated. If her place of work even cares about this. Bc here not being vaccinated can lead to those kids and babies losing their lives... it her choice of not vaccinated. If you wa... |
So, my Ex has been kind of rude and inconsiderate to me even before we broke up. She decided to cheat on me while i was mourning the loss of my Dad and during the week of my birthday (sucks ass) her "birthday present" to me was telling me in detail about her fucking 3 guys that week. I know it sounds crazy and like it ... | NTA. If she works at a bank she definitely knows better. ###### |
I live with three roommates, were supposed to split bills four ways. Not my ideal living situation but I was unexpectedly moving after a breakup.
One of my roommates, Lucy, has not paid her share of the electric bill in months, she says she just hasn't gotten around to setting up the service (venmo) we all use to pa... | NTA. If she was sincere about paying her share she'd have been thankful for that reminder. The fact that she got pissed off meant that she never intended to pay her share. Ain't nobody got time for leeches.
Edit: Thanks for the award! ###### |
For context, this is on discord. I’m 18 and my little sister is 12. I recently came upon a server that she’s in, and found out that she had been telling people she was 17. That really didn’t sit right with me, especially considering she was talking to a boy who was 18. They keep flirting and it’s making me worry about ... | NTA. If she was just claiming to be 13 to get round discord's age limit I'd tell you to leave it but claiming to be 17 and flirting with an adult is too dangerous for her to be allowed to continue. Both for her and for the guy. ###### |
So a few months ago my Gf had to get a skin lesion cut out. Just removing an infection about the size of a dime then stitching it back up. She asked me about a week before if I would go with her. I told her I don’t think so because I had just started my last semester of college and had class at the time. She said okay,... | NTA. If she wants you to come to her doctor's appointments (or anything else) then she needs to schedule it for a time that works for both of you.
It's a huge display of immaturity for her to still try to hold this against you. Next time she brings it up you should ask her why this is her go to incident.
Talk it out... |
My husband and I adopted our oldest son in 2016, and biologically he is my husband's nephew (his mom is my husband's sister). Anyway, she had been making poor life choices for quite some time, but it ultimately came to a head in 2014, when her drug usage caused her to lose all of her kids. She went to prison for a whil... | NTA. If she wants to have a relationship with her bio son, then she needs to put in the work. And if he wants nothing to do with her? Then that's his business. ###### |
My daughter is 16 and recently has watched several documentaries, read a few books, medical journals and has come to the conclusion that she wants to become a vegetarian. My husband and I support this, however the rest of us are not vegetarians. We don’t make carnivorous meals every night, but I would say at least 5 o... | NTA. If she wants to eat a different diet from the rest of the family, then she needs to make her own meals. I went through the same thing as a teenager, and it was no big deal. It actually helped foster a love for cooking and got me ready for the big wide world. ###### |
(On mobile, sorry for any formatting issues. Also I talk about going out, but this was pre-covid. She just brought it up to me recently, and I wanted some other opinions.)
I (25f) love my sister (35) a lot, but sometimes when we go out she likes to tell people we're sisters and have them guess how old we are. At first... | NTA. If she wants to constantly play that weird age game then she had it coming. Especially when she basically shamed you afterwards too. Seems like she got real full of herself after that surgery ###### |
I recently finished my internship and I offered them to hire me. I enjoyed my time there and hoped I could earn some extra money over the holiday season. My boss and colleagues liked to keep me but the management insisted that they would not hire anybody.
Fast forward to this weekend. I get a message from my boss that... | NTA. If she wanted work, she could have easily rescheduled appointments. Medical appointments, I could empathize as there is often a long wait for those. But hair appointments? Nope. ###### |
My wife has wanted a vegetable garden in our backyard. Now that it's starting to warm up I thought I would try to tackle something this weekend. I did some research online, looked up some designs, and tried to show my wife to get her input. She would only give me short answers and told me just to make something nice an... | NTA. If she wanted a garden badly enough she should have done it herself, and if she expected you to do it then she should have had a very clear conversation with you beforehand on her expectations for said garden. You were just trying to be helpful and give her what she wanted and she was ignoring you. ###### |
I just turned 23 last week. My friend said that she would treat me to a meal, so we met up in a mall during the weekends. For context, we make around the same money. She is a rather conservative with money while I am all for spending as long as it's worth.
Originally I wanted to eat Korean BBQ buffet, but my friend s... | NTA. If she only wanted to spend $12 on you for your birthday, that is her business, but she should have either (a) bought you a gift that was $12 (sounds like she couldn't be bothered), (b) taken you somewhere that would never come to more than $12, rather than somewhere you had to order the cheapest thing and no dri... |
Obligatory apologies for being a mobile user and the rest of the blah blah blah.
My wife is pregnant with our first child, and I’m very happy. The other day, we’re having a conversation about the family around us and making plans, it was nice. Then it was mentioned about my father, who would obviously be ‘Grandad’ to ... | NTA. If she never liked you and didn’t treat you like a mother, you don’t owe her access to your child and for her to be a nan. My grandpa remarried after my grandma died and she was [first name], not nan. Not out of malicious intent but we didn’t have that kind of relationship. My peers never had trouble understandin... |
Okay, so I’m writing this on behalf of myself and my housemates (7 of us total). Recently, it was one of my housemate’s birthday and invited a handful of people over including this girl. He let her sleepover at our house along with some others because they were all drunk and would’ve had to drive home.
In the morning,... | NTA. If she left the stuff in your fridge and she’s some rando girl it’s definitely not your problem. Super weird that she was their all day and drinking and I’m assuming driving?? ###### |
My grandmother is a very stubborn person.She never thinks she is wrong and get emotional when I call her out on her behavior.
She loves cooking,its tasty food but there is only so much I can eat, I get full very quickly compared to others in my family. She frequently makes different types of food for us to eat and I p... | NTA. If she is trying to force you to eat, when you say no, she is a major ah.
Put her in time out since she wants to be so toxic. Grandma's don't get special treatment. If anything they should listen to you more than your parents, not less. ###### |
I (26M) had been dating my girlfriend (23F) for a few months now. We were at her house trying to tidy the attic and then we found some pictures of her as a teenager with some friends. I asked her how popular she was at school. I was quite popular, had a lot of friends, and was just wondering.
What she said turned my m... | NTA. If she got to 23 and doesn't understand that her bullying was wrong, she might still be a bully. Red flag. ###### |
I (22F) went to visit a friend who needed some help from Thursday morning to Sunday evening. I asked my mom to look after my cat (visit in the evening, feed/give water/scoop litter) while I was gone. I always look after her dog when she's on vacation, so it was fine.
When I came back I found out she had reorganized m... | NTA. If she didn’t decide to rearrange your cupboards then surely she wouldn’t have found the brush? I also don’t understand the logic behind her choosing to use that brush... surely it looked used, as you’ve used it to clean the litter box. So why did a different (clearly used) brush seem better than the one already ... |
I (48M) recently won the lottery. Before you congratulate me too much, it was a local state lottery and certainly not a Mega Millions or Powerball jackpot. However it is enough to help me buy a moderately priced house and my take care of my debts with enough left over to have an investment account. I don't plan on q... | NTA. If she didn't give money for the ticket, there is no obligation for anything. That's just pests coming out of the woodwork. ###### |
My roommate regularly borrows my car and leaves my car keys in her purse. I had an errand to run and my keys were not on the hook in the kitchen they belong on. I went to look in her purse figuring my keys were in there (they were) and she got mad I looked in her purse. I told her if she didn't want me looking in he... | NTA. If she can’t be decent enough to return your keys to you or the hook after you’re decent enough to let her borrow your car, you have every right to go looking for your keys when you need them. ###### |
Hi- I have a sister who is a few years older than me, and has wanted kids since she was a kid. She wants a small litter of them and is a primary school teacher, and I think one day she will make a great mum.
I, on the other hand, do not like kids. Full stop. I never want to be pregnant, I don't find baby videos cute... | NTA. If she can talk about her potential future children, you can talk about your potential future nieces and nephews. ###### |
I grew up with "Uncle" and "Aunt" siblings. My brother Rob is 42, my sister Patricia is 39. I am \[Winona\] 20F.
My brother has a 19-year-old daughter \[Gina\] whom I call my sister. We are close. We currently live together and attend the same Uni. We go on a lot of trips together and talk on the phone for hours. Sh... | NTA. If pictures were that important to her, she should have brought a camera. And it seemed that she only asks about you if she needs something. ###### |
I’m (26F) and almost 7 months pregnant (2 days away), I thankfully still have my job. Sadly my fiancé (32M) was laid off, due to his job not being essential.
I have even taken extra days to be able to support us and still have money when baby comes. Today is day 19 of me working without a day off (my boss always che... | NTA. If one person works, the other should keep the house running. ###### |
I honestly don't know if I did the right thing. I live by myself, and my little sister was over for the weekend, and this has been eating at me, so I need judgment.
My sister (12) was ranting about how she feels her parents (she's my stepsister) always favor our little sibling, and she had _quite_ the list of examples... | NTA. If nothing else she left the conversation knowing she has an older sibling who loves her and will support her ###### |
I've always hated my name because it's really uncommon and my teachers and even some of my friends pronounce it incorrectly (even after several corrections). I eventually got sick of it and researched legal name changes and the procedures and decided to save up for a name change after asking my mum and dad (to which th... | NTA. If money is so tight they have to steal from their kid they should NOT be going to a fucking ski resort. People like this make me sick.
r/narcissisticparents ###### |
To preface this, I’ve been dating my girlfriend for a couple months and she has a variety of mental health issues, including severe social anxiety. One thing she has started doing is making this extremely loud high pitched scream whenever she feels emotion, like when she’s very happy, shocked, and as a greeting. It wou... | NTA. If its litterally hurting your ears than she should try to quieter ###### |
Recurring situation: live-in BF says he’s going to run to the convenience store that’s about a 2-minute drive from the apartment. Usually asks if I want something to drink, etc.
About half the time he comes right back. The other half, he comes back 30-45 minutes later, sometimes longer. Usually, it’s because he’s buyi... | NTA. If it’s not necessary that you each know where the other is, then I suggest you get up and leave without telling him where you’re going at all and see how he responds when you return a few hours later. ###### |
I (33f) am very big on jewelry. I have made myself quite a large collection over the years. I have 4 siblings, 2 sisters 2 brothers. I've recently decided to sell a few pieces that I found myself wearing less and less. They're still beautiful and in perfect condition. From the pieces that I chose to sell I gave a few t... | NTA. If it's you openly don't get along with her then she shouldn't be expecting a gift from you. ###### |
I live with a sibling, we have been roommates for a while. Their luggage broke down years ago, not long before I bought a set for myself for a little over a $110. Since then every time they go out of town they insist on using mine. I personally don't use them often whereas they go out of town a several times a year.
... | NTA. If it were only on occasion (once or twice a year) that would be one thing (but its 4 or 5 times a year its reasonable to suggest they get their own luggage. Or perhaps they can buy the set off of you? ###### |
Okay, first a little background ... I (21F) live with my boyfriend (25M) in a one bedroom apartment. We technically have a room that could be a second bedroom, but it's very small and currently being used as an office space. We both attend university in DC (undergrad and law school respectively) and have continued to l... | NTA. If it was me in this situation, I wouldn't allow any exes, his or mine, to live with us. If he insisted, he'd end up with two ex-girlfriends. ###### |
I am trying to save a good emergency fund so I can move out of my parent’s house. My brother is 8 years old than me and more established in his career and everything—he wants to buy a house to live in with his fiancée. He knows I have an emergency fund saved (our family is pretty open about money + finances) and he cam... | NTA. If it only takes him 2 months to make that much, then he can wait 2 months to buy a house ###### |
Hello! Longtime listener, first time caller.
I (29m) work a property management job that I hate. I have to evict people and we’re in the midst of a pandemic. It’s really soul destroying.
I got a message from an old friend that offered me a job once he purchased a new business to oversee two similar stores and run t... | NTA. If it hadn't worked out, both of you would be devastated. Instead, you took the logical move to see whether it might be a good idea. As far as I see, you haven't made the decision to change the job without her. If you had it would be reasonable that she could be angry since you have both planned goals and changes... |
This is more of an “Are *We* The Assholes”, because I’m speaking for everyone participating minus the friend in question.
We’re currently in the early stages of planning our trip to Japan for next year (fingers crossed things are safe enough by then). This will be our second group trip to Japan, the first one being l... | NTA. If I was the only woman going on a vacation I would for sure feel more comfortable renting a place with my significant other for just ourselves. ###### |
Okay so I realize this sounds like the plot to a porno with a mom walking in on her son but I couldn't think of a better way to write this. Basically I went upstairs to my son's room to ask what he felt for supper, I knocked on the door a few times and called his name but got no answer. I assumed he was asleep so I ope... | NTA. If I was a parent and got no answer from my kid after knocking a few times, I would absolutely enter the room. You might fear the worst. Or maybe I'm just neurotic.
Either way, he'll get over it. He'll laugh about it with his mates in a couple of years. ###### |
Before I start, I'm F18 and all the people in the story are around my age. Also, english is not my first language, so I'm sorry for any mistakes.
So, not while ago, this guy (M20 I think??) followed me on IG, and we had some mutual followers so I decided to follow him back. Soon after that I got a message from him say... | NTA. If his mother would be ashamed of his actions that speaks to his assholeness, not yours. ###### |
Throwaway and fake names
A couple of my friends hung out recently (where we live in a place with less than a hundred cases and masks are still required)
One of my friends, Dylan came with his new girlfriend Ann, who happens to be black, to introduce us to her which we were all fine with and knew beforehand.
I’m m... | NTA. If his girlfriend were white but with the same personality, you would react the same. Also, I agree with you on Dylan being racist in stereotyping black women. ###### |
Am I about to rant over a muffin? Yes! I live in a pretty big household. I have 6 other siblings. So when my sisters made muffins last night, I’d already eaten so I decided I wanted one for the morning. But I knew my siblings would’ve eaten them all by the time I woke up and didn’t feel like risking it. So I hid one wi... | NTA. If he's punishing kids for "hiding food" sounds like he needs to do a better job providing enough for everyone. ###### |
I (26f) and my fiancé (27m) moved out of my father's house. Now to get context.
My father was not really a father to me growing up. He would mentally abuse me and sometimes verbally. We even got into fist fights.
My fiancé moved and my father tried playing "I'm a good guy". A week later, when the lockdown starte, he... | NTA. If he's not ready to do anything to get food, why should you be responsible for it. Especially if he's such a dick towards you (and has been for a long time). ###### |
Well... My ex and I divorced and I moved away with my two oldest kids and our youngest. We split up because he is a workaholic and doesn’t want to engage in any kind of family activity.
I had a cat when we met and he lied about being allergic, so I had to give up the cat when we moved in together.
Now that we moved... | NTA. If he's crappy enough of a dad to refuse to visit your daughter (or even just pick her up from the house) because you have a cat, then she's probably better off without him. He no longer lives with you and doesn't get a say in what pets you have. Enjoy your sweet little kitten. ###### |
My (31m) oldest brother (49m) is installing a deck on our parents house. It's obvious even to a kindergartner that the posts are crooked. And the entire deck is crooked. Almost a entire foot.
I told both of our parents about it. Showed them. Neither will say anything to him.
I didnt help yesterday because i was busy ... | NTA. If he were hanging a picture crooked? Fine, doesn't hurt anyone. But when you're literally building something on to the house? Yeah, that should probably be done the right way. ###### |
I (18) still live with my parents at home due to studying. I work away for a week every other week. As soon as I leave for work my brother (24M) decides to come in my room and set up camp with his playstation, TV, chair, ETC. Under normal circumstances I wouldn’t mind but I’ve recently finished decorating, spending £10... | NTA. If he wants to use your room he has to treat it with respect.
INFO: why does he feel the need to use your room? ###### |
This happened last year, before this craziness, but my ex is still angry about it.
My son is in high school. His school has a heavily discounted drivers ed program that they run twice a year, once in the fall and once in the spring. My son's father and I agreed that he would take that program because it was designed a... | NTA. If he wants to punish your kid in a way that impacts you, he needs to consult you first. Hell, this would punish you more than your kid! ###### |
My husband has been temporarily laid off. Previously he worked full time (overtime, long hours) and I was a stay at home mom by day / worked part time at a restaurant in the evening / finishing my master’s degree at night (my mom often babysat the kids because my husband wouldn’t be home in time). Now my job has close... | NTA. If he wants a night off then you guys can schedule it so that way another night you get a night off. And school is 100% work and not relaxing time! ###### |
Brother and Sister in law are between buying and selling houses. It appears as though the dates of closings aren’t lining up and they are short what they need for the deposit on new place. Brother has asked if I can give them a short term loan of approx 30k for their down payment which they will payback as soon as the ... | NTA. If he intends to pay it back by x date then why would he mind if it was in writing? ###### |
We have been together for nearly four years. I'm very adamantly childfree, which he knew prior to us dating, and BC doesn't seem to like me, as I've gotten pregnant on it twice already. I'm not in the US and the only doctor I found who will tie my tubes, being that I'm 23 and don't have any children, wants 17,500 of my... | NTA. If he doesn’t want a surgical procedure done, that’s his choice. If you don’t want to get on BC, that’s your choice. If both of you are on the same page about not wanting kids then you need to find a compromise. Him not wanting to use condoms just because he doesn’t like them when every other method seems to not ... |
I’m on mobile so sorry
A little background is that and my twin sister(19) currently live in an apartment together and we are half Russian and our mom insisted we learn the language. We are fluent but our little brother(16) isn’t. Our apartment is kind of a Russian zone since we just tend to be more comfortable speaking... | NTA. If he doesn't want to learn Russian, then he doesn't have to but he is in your apartment, you can speak whatever language you want when you are talking to each other ###### |
I’ve been dating a guy for about 9 months. I told him today that I purchased (I was about to, it was on back order) a non permanent dance pole or a “stripper pole” to put in my bedroom for fun. It’s elegant, sexy, it’s good exercise and it’s fun. I thought not only would be fun for me as I like dancing, just as a hobby... | NTA. If he doesn't trust you now, he never will and you'll be miserable. Get away from him. ###### |
Edit: by toilet I mean toilet bowl rim mainly
My(23) boyfriend (30) of 5 months is pretty great and has visited my apartment pretty frequently as of late. He generally picks up after himself ok enough, there is one hug pet peeve that he is aggrrivating. When he uses my toilet ,he regularly leaves pee under the lid ... | NTA. If he can’t stand and aim then sit the fuck down ###### |
My brother has been dating "Jenny" since they were 16. They're now 19. They both go to community college part-time. Her dad is a rich doctor and our parents work at a factory. Everyone is cool with each other. My brother was joking that he and Jenny have started having 100% unprotected sex. No condom, no pill. I told h... | NTA. If both of them are dependent on their parents for food and shelter, then their parents have a right to know about this, as the decision to have a child affects them too.
(Original): Need more info.
First, what's their living situation? Living with parents, separate but on their own, together, what?
Second, ho... |
Today during a Zoom meeting, my colleagues and I were discussing the Pandemic and the topic of Self-Check Outs at Grocery Stores was discussed. I then recalled an incident I had a couple of months ago right before Christmas. Although they were laughing at my story, some of them were saying I was an asshole and disrespe... | NTA. If both a cashier and self checkout are options at the store, and you want cashier service, it’s your choice. Some self service setups are just terrible.
I’m usually polite, but If they badgered me like that, I’d also have a sarcastic retort. ###### |
My brother and I are extremely close, he got engaged a few months back and we are all happy for him and his fiance. I am also close with his fiance, she is a sweet girl but suffers from chronic migraines at least 4 times a month (these are so bad that she literally just sleeps all day when these hit) and is very depres... | NTA. If asked again, I would say something along the lines of it would be a conflict of interest for you to hire her because of your personal relationship.
I see another comment that you are paying for SIL's medication for migraines. Is it this same SIL? ###### |
I (late 30s M) was visiting an old friend from High School and his wife. I should mention that at the time I had just finished a doctorate in Math -- this is relevant to the story. There were a number of people hanging out. Most of them I knew but my friend's wife's friend Janice ( late 40's F) and her daughter Ellie (... | NTA. If anything the kid was being gross. You got out of the situation without humiliating her. ###### |
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