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Nooo! | Lisa, wake up! They're taking Angelica to Mount Purgatorium. |
Oh Dad, I'm tired. We'll read more tomorrow. | Tomorrow? But she's in trouble now! I'll just read ahead without you. |
No! We have to read it together. | Oh, of course. Whatever you say, sweetie. Nighty-night. |
You must read ahead. Fiction is your passion! | Lady, you're nice, but I'm married. |
Just read the book, you shaved ape. | Ow! I can't read ahead -- I promised Lisa I wouldn't! |
Just take a peek at the title of the next chapter and see if you can resist. | "An Unexpected Occurrence?!" What could it be?! |
Greystash. | He killed Greystash! |
C'mon Dad, read the last chapter! Everyone says there's a big surprise -- I bet Angelica discovers that she's a wizard! | Uh... how would you feel if something bad happened to Greystash? |
Come on, read, read! | "Angelica was trapped in the Suffoclock of Sandy Doom..." |
Why are you stopping? We're almost at the happy ending! | "Greystash looked Krubb right in the eye and said..." |
Is that really how it ends? What happened to the Merlinical Council? | Uh, they went to Star Wars Land and fought star wars. |
Dad, you can read to me anytime. | Now Lisa won't know about death till it strikes someone close to her. |
Gee, you're really upset about this Greystash thing. | Don't say his name! In your mouth it sounds like dirt! |
Homer, it's just a book. | No man should outlive his fictional wizard! No man! |
Awwww! | Just think, Lisa, if I had paid for those skating lessons, that could've been you! |
Grumply, grumply groo, I'll throw my net over you! | Look out! It's the Grumple! |
Come on, Homer, let's get the kids out of here. Homer? | Give back that Holiday Cheer, you bastard! |
Yeah! Maybe I should spend the night here, too. | You're getting a cab, old man. In fact, I believe I see it now. |
But I haven't given you a present. | Your present is leaving. |
Well, I figured since you invited me to stay, I might as well go down to the bus locker and get my stuff. | Marge, we have a problem here. |
Grumply, grumply groo, your blood will make my stew! | Do you think that's the same Grumple from the ice show? Because I do. |
I'll tell you why: Christian charity. | Christian Charity? What does a porn star have to do with this? He's gotta go! |
I promise you, he'll leave after today. | Really? Who's gonna make him? |
I will. | He sure has a lot of markers that don't work. |
Well, I got something...a spider bite. Or as I like to call it, a "Christmas kiss." | Don't worry, I make six of those a year. |
Wait, you don't have a place to live? | Lower the boom! |
I guess you don't have to leave till the holiday's over... | Has the boom been lowered? |
He's still in need, we have to let him stay. It's what Dr. King would want us to do. | Oh, that's it -- we're changing doctors. |
Please, just a few more days. | Marge, admit it -- you just can't say "no" to anyone. That's why you have three kids. |
It's true -- I do have trouble saying "no." It all started when I was seven... | Yes we are. |
And that's why I have trouble saying "no" to people -- even Gil! | Marge, I have no idea what you were just thinking about. Why would you think I did? |
What'sa matter, Homer? Do you still miss the UPN? | Yeah, but there's something else. There's this loser staying in our house. Marge says she's gonna kick him out, but then she never does. |
Well, you can't kick him out, 'cause then Marge will never learn to assert herself. | Well, I guess I'll have to wait for Marge to show some backbone and-- You again?! |
Well, you can't kick him out, 'cause then Marge will never learn to assert herself. | What the hell is this thing? |
Homie, wake up! I rented that negligee you like. | Those legs go on forever. Oh wait, they stop right there. |
Homer, don't forget it's Valentine's Day! Whatcha gettin' the Mrs.? | A heart-shaped box of chocolates. |
Well, I'm still a winner. As long as I've got a cup-a coffee and a tomorrow on the calendar, Ol' Gil's comin' back. Say Homer, how 'bout closin' up that robe? I'm seeing the whole butcher shop. | For your information, since I bought it I put on a ton of weight. |
A CREDIT TO OLD IRELAND/ IS MACNAMARA'S BAND. | Their drunken singing is ruining St. Patrick's day! |
I'll tell you what. We're going to Scottsdale! | Scottsdale? Will we stay at a Tripletree Resort? |
Sure! | Then forget it! |
Whoa, Gil's a big shot! | And to think, he and I once shared a shower. |
I don't care how successful Gil is, he's still a mooch, and I need to tell him off! | A hundred and seventeen degrees! Ooo, that reminds me. |
I don't care how successful Gil is, he's still a mooch, and I need to tell him off! | There's water under the seat! |
I was so happy on that island... | I've never seen Marge want to go somewhere so badly. I'm gonna take her back there... by burning that home movie onto a DVD. |
This was my favorite seahorse. I called him Mr. Funnygoodfeeling... Oh God, someone carved swastikas on your eyes! | Oh Marge, I'm sure it was just some guy filled with hate. |
Dip your berries? / Powder your jellies? | You could caramel my arm... |
I make it nice and sticky, heh? | I didn't say "stop." |
Homer, that's too much sugar! | It's not sugar, it's caramel! |
Excuse me, skipper -- this island used to be a paradise. What happened? | I bet it was Bill Clinton's fault. |
No, no, it was long before him. | Slick Willie wiggles out of another one. |
I guess in the end, nothing's as good as you remember. | Oh, I can't stand to see your mother unhappy. But this town could be great for your mother again. And I know three people who can make it happen. |
Homer, this is wonderful. Where are the kids? | Oh, they're getting a little exercise. |
Can I go again? | All night long, baby. |
Aaahhh! | A green spinner to build suspense... and then the big finale, the: |
Well, at least they left your underwear on. That was nice of them. | I think the hook is touching my brain. . |
My husband meant no harm. There must be some way he can pay for what he did. He's good at opening jars. | Dammit! |
I say let him fish it off. These waters are so barren, by the time he pays the debt, he'll be as old and as queer as I am! | Queer strange or queer gay? |
None. Just a few slarg fish. | Ew, it tastes terrible! |
No, you don't eat it. Its oil is used to polish stripper poles. | Finally. Something even I wouldn't eat. Well, maybe a little more. |
No, you don't eat it. Its oil is used to polish stripper poles. | Terrible. |
Wait, this is bait! Homer, I told you to beer batter the shrimp and bait the hooks. Did you do the opposite? | Uh... I thought today was Opposite Day. By the way, you're very ugly. It's Opposite Day. |
It's not Opposite Day! | So that means... it is Opposite Day. |
We're gonna be rich! And it's all thanks to you, Homer! Or should I say... Chief Fish Clubber Homer! | I don't know what to say. |
Oh Homie, I'm so worried. But if I concentrate, our love is so strong, I know I can hear your thoughts. | Dear Marge, how are you? I am fine. The waves here are way bigger than the ones at home. And the salt water is rising. What's next? Pepper water? Ha ha. Love ya, Homer Simpson. |
Dad... I couldn't stay with Mom and Lisa while you were out here. | Aw, son. |
They were gonna go to the Folk Art Museum, then they were gonna paint crab shells. Not crush them, paint them. | You did the right thing, boy. |
We're still gonna make it, aren't we Dad? | Uh... sure we will, son. Right, Captain? |
Absolutely. Bart, the sea wouldn't dare take the life of an apple-cheeked young lad like yourself. | Should I hit him with a shovel to spare him the pain of drowning? |
Not yet. | What's the code word? |
Not yet. | Oh mother sea -- giver of fish, taker of boats, toilet to the world, the Greeks called you Poseidon, the Romans... Aquaman. Look into thy starfish heart and protect our souls, so we might live to go tubing on thee again. |
Not yet. | Do you think your Mother will ever remarry? |
In about two seconds. | Why you little... |
All we do know is they're in Heaven now, hanging their lines off a cloud, and fishin' for airplanes. | The hell we are! |
How did you make it? | Well, handsome here was in big trouble...when suddenly... |
How did you make it? | Oh my God! It's beautiful! |
Welcome, Homer, to our watery realm. | Wait a minute. How am I breathing? |
You're not! | Then when all seemed lost... |
Lot of garbage fish today. | I can't go back to living on the surface world! I can't! |
Lot of garbage fish today. | Then they brought us home... |
"Chill Thunder"! "Chill Thunder"! | You're all idiots. I'm putting it on Chill Thunder Lite. |
Outta my way, ya seatbelt wearin' cowards! | Hey! Nobody cuts me off! |
Outta my way, ya seatbelt wearin' cowards! | How's it goin'? |
Homer, no! Revenge never solves anything. | Then what's America doing in Iraq? |
Papa, may we have petit fours? | May we? May we? Mais oui! |
You're under arrest for treason! | Treason?! But I love France! The way all our words are either a girl or a guy! Oh, that's the best! |
Tell it to le baton! | I don't want the kids to see me this way! |
I sentence you to life... | You moron! I'm already alive! |
Hey wait, did you guys hear that? He just admitted it! Guys? Oh man, this place is so unfair. | Are you gonna torture me? |
Now get some sleep -- you've got a nine a.m. Rat Helmet. | Nine a.m.?! |
Now get some sleep -- you've got a nine a.m. Rat Helmet. | I swear revenge on Meaux! Even if it takes me the rest of my life! Can you loosen my arm so I can shake my fist? |
You're the traitor. | REVENGE! Okay. |
Perhaps I may be of help. | Where did you come from? |
I'm your cellmate. You never noticed me, because, frankly, you're extremely self-centered. | Oh sorry, I wasn't listening. I was checking out my reflection in this yellow water. Lookin' good. |
I spent thirty years digging this tunnel, but now I can't use it. I'm simply too old. | And decrepit. |
But you can escape -- and use this map to retrieve my buried treasure. With it, you can have your revenge! | Oooh, the the! But why are you helping me? |
Well, because before my wretched life comes to a close, I want to know that I had one friend. Also, because while you slept, I violated you repeatedly. | So this map leads to a treasure, huh? |
Well, because before my wretched life comes to a close, I want to know that I had one friend. Also, because while you slept, I violated you repeatedly. | I wonder how long this tunnel... |
When we meet the count, do you think he'll like us? / I've heard rumors he's mysterious! | Madame, you have the shapely, hairless knuckles of a queen. |
I've heard about these things. They're good for doin' the wife, right? | Little do you know that the Count of Monte Cristo is in fact an old acquaintance of yours. |
Ma?... | I have returned! |
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