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I don't want to do it any more. Just booked some counselling sessions.
I don't want to go.
I don't want to try any more. Fuck it, fuck this shit. I hate feeling like this.
I don't want to exist.
I want to hurt myself until I don't exist any more.
Yet I don't want to do that.
I want to live.
Oh God, I want to... | 4 | [
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How does a doctor diagnose Bipolar disorder? I've always known deep in my heart that there is something wrong with me, but I have been without health insurance for years now and am only now on a health care plan through my job. I don't know if it's something that a regular doctor can diagnose or what the process is. I'... | 1 | [
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I don't have many friends So I guess from the time I was in elementary I was a shy kid, but almost unnaturally shy like I had one friend through all my years. Middle school I was forced to make some new friends, high school I pretty much kept those some friends minus a couple. College finally comes around and I can't m... | 2 | [
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Zoloft I started on Zoloft about 2 months ago. First 100mg, and after about 4 weeks I increased to 200mg (per doctor instructions).
A little while after I started taking it, and still now, alcohol is gross. I’m not a huge drinker, but I do love wine and beer. I’ve been on SSRIs for years. I just switched to zoloft as... | 4 | [
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Something I wrote tonight A crisp white coating engulfed the road at 5am. Another sleepless night, another crunchy step taken on the path to escape. It's like a deathbed, cold yet in a way comforting.
The dimly lit roads winding through the hills all seemingly leading nowhere but in an endless circle. A cruel metapho... | 4 | [
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Involuntary shouting, growling, whining, laughing and a strong urge to scream and punch things, and restlessness at bedtime. I've had a lot of traumatic experiences in my life and I started meditation a while back and ever since then this has been happening to me. It's like "old junk" is coming up from the past. And it... | 4 | [
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Fed up with health care providers Yesterday, I had an appointment with the physical therapist. I showed up on time, checked in at the kiosk, and sat down in the waiting room, as you do. Time passes, no one shows up, and there's no one at the reception desk for me to inquire about what's going on.
Twenty minutes after ... | 3 | [
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With every day that passes I feel like I want to put a gun in my mouth and blow my fucking head off [deleted] | 4 | [
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[NAW] I hate my Dad. All my life, I can never think of a time when I ever truly loved my pops. Growing up, he was really absent from elementary up until about early high school. In those early high school years, he started trying to connect with me more, speak with me when we were together, etc. I'd be hard-pressed to ... | 3 | [
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Bi polar bear destroys sanity...first time reddit user First time reddit user here so I apologize if this post isn't as fluent as others.
Fuck where to start..This past late winter/spring I had a pretty ridiculous manic episode landing my ass in the hospital for a few days. Where for the first time I was diagnosed bipo... | 1 | [
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Last One So all my friends I made freshman year in 2013 are graduating. I’m still a freshman bc I tore my Lcl and acl I honestly don’t feel like living anymore. I work at fast food restaurants, and barely make anything to live by. Much less pay any student loans, pay credit cards, or pay any medical bills. My older sib... | 4 | [
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What am I doing wrong if all my friends hang out with each other and im not even invited? No joke, 2 of my best friends who I talk with everyday hang out over the weekend, and the way I find out is seeing it on social media. What is wrong here seriously? I can't even think straight, this is making me lose hope. | 2 | [
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My mother-in-law became unbearable once we had children Okay. So my mother-in-law and I were fine up until my husband and I had kids. Suddenly she became incredibly overbearing, opinionated, etc.
With my oldest son (2.5), she was hypercritical about us having him in daycare. She said that I was too strict about taking... | 3 | [
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i'm dead My dad left when I was young, I feel useless and unwanted, I hear voices they tell me that i'm a chosen one, that I am God's person, chosen to be resurrected in the new earth, i'm unsure whether i'm just crazy or not | 0 | [
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I’m writing a Suicide note rn. I’m not sure how I’m going to do it but I️ can’t do this anymore. I’m at the lowest point I’ve ever been and it feels like I’ll never recover. There is no hope. My parents are tired of worrying about me, my boyfriend broke up with me... I️ have no one, I have nothing.
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Nobody wants to go to the concert with me [deleted] | 3 | [
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Every year gets worse, been like this since I was 15, I’m now 20. I am depression. I’ve become depression. Ever since freshman year when my friends ditched me for other people, I’ve been fighting depression. It all sparked that year and I’m reaching a point to where I really feel nothing at all. I’m so scared of the wo... | 4 | [
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How do you end a truly addictive toxic relationship? [deleted] | 4 | [
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Literally nothing has gone right for me in 2017 I feel like it's about time I let my stress out because quite frankly this year has been total crap.
2017 started off sour. My 21st birthday was a week before the new year and that ended up being a night I have no positive memory of. Why? The girl I liked at the time end... | 3 | [
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Emptiness I have lost all the emotions, all I do is sleep, because then I don't have to see life... I 'like' the feeling - so soothing. Recently I have started getting out of body feelings and dizziness on top of the mental numbness I have all the time. Everyday is just... a day, nothing important just empty hollow fee... | 0 | [
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[light] I really like Kafka I can relate to K. in The Castle more than any character in any book I’ve read so far. The absolute absurdity that K. faces as he tries so hard to get to the castle - I feel like I live it too. It cracks me up that he sort of, just, accepts the nonsense as normal. But when it’s all around yo... | 3 | [
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How do I tell them? Advice needed Hi guys,
I’m 21 and active on tinder. However, I have a rare disability that I was born with and is noticeable once you’re around me enough. Without getting into it, i basically have bad balance, almost like I’m “drunk” walking (talk about living life on the edge). Anyways, it’s not ... | 3 | [
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This subreddit hasn't been very helpful for me. Even though lots of people here offered their help, I've never been able to exchange more than about 5 or 10 messages without being ghosted.
It's a new kind of low when you cannot connect even with people on a depression forum.
It really feels like I'm truly alone in th... | 4 | [
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Struggling with things thoughts seem to be trapped Can anybody give me some advice to help me get out of my head, I’ll constantly just get lost in my thoughts and sink into a depressive state.
Going outside and doing things definitely helps me but when I’m done doing those things sitting in my room the thoughts just co... | 2 | [
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Coming Out of Long Term Depression - What Now? I'm 32, and coming out of a few years of depression, and in a way getting out of decades of lower level anxiety and depression, and realizing that I am really nowhere in life.
No great career to speak of, no long term relationship certainly no great assets or anything.
... | 4 | [
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Any advice? Hello, my names taylor, before I get into asking any questions I just want to give some quick backstory.
So there’s me 19, currently. I have a girlfriend who is still in highschool. We have been in a long distance relationship for over a year now. We’ve met several times now and I have even stayed at her ho... | 4 | [
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Trying to quit caffeine bring me to a real bad depression. I get the headaches and all the withdraw symptoms. Specifically when I don’t consume caffeine for a day my brain get foggy and I start having awful thoughts. Anyone else have experience with this? | 4 | [
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Just got paid and have 100.00 to live off of for 2 weeks. I have a 2 year old son and a wife...I just got paid and after bills all i have is 100.00. How can i afford food and gas to get to work with that.
Im done. Ive searched and searched for a new better paying job. But cant find anything at all...
I cant take th... | 0 | [
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Depression is like a parasite. It feeds off my body to live. It lives a life; controlling mine, while I live none. | 4 | [
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I never trust my own opinion I find that I never really trust my own opinion I'm always seeking validation from others. I can't do anything on my own because I never feel like I'm capable of doing things by myself. | 4 | [
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My wife Told me about Peak oil and I was paralyzed I seriously can't imagine how to go forward. There seems to be no hope, and I'm too anxious to read the book she's reading and she hasn't gotten to the "solutions" part yet. | 2 | [
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Just don't know anymore. It's like I'm barely making it. I'm shot, I've lost my hum. I've lost my spark. | 4 | [
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i feel dirty and guilty and in pain. so much pain. i was sexually abused as a child. i've never said that, i didn't even acknowledge it myself until a very little while ago. i feel like i'm gonna throw up. i hate myself. the worst part is i literally begged. i fucking begged for it, every fucking time. i wanted it. why... | 0 | [
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Stuck in a well (metaphorically) Hey everyone, this is my first to Reddit (woo!) Anyway, I've been struggling with major depression for a while now, a few years. I haven't been managing as well as I'd like to and I've had trouble coming out to friends and loved ones about it. I just really need support. I've accepted t... | 4 | [
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When you're having an Anxiety Attack and suddenly feel the need to go to the bathroom but you're in a state of physical and mental lockup. Jesus this sucks. | 2 | [
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I’m dating a psychopath I’ve realized after 7 months his true colors... today he told me he felt like murdering someone. And that if I wasn’t with him he would’ve went through with it.
He’s either pure evil, or so so sweet... no in between.
My life has been a rollercoaster. He’s 48 & I’m 20 by the way. How did ... | 3 | [
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six Months employment gap on cV due to anxiety. How do i explain this in a job interview? Hello all,
As you can probably tell from my username, I have taken it upon myself to attempt to get out of the rut I am currently stuck in, caused due to anxiety.
After a bad experience with management in my previous job, I ende... | 2 | [
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A couple questions, a thank you, and an apology....again Well first I'd like to apologize for the last few days. I woke up this morning feeling depressed instead of manic, looked through my past two posts and realized my tone of writing was pretty rude. I was pretty lost in my mood state and I wasn't really accepting o... | 1 | [
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Crying for help I'm suicidal, but I don't want to die. I want to just make a cry for help, but I don't want to be put back in the hospital. I'm so lost and I don't know what to do. Therapy and meds have never worked, and I don't think they ever will. Life is just a fucking shit hole that I don't wanna be in.
Edit: HOW... | 0 | [
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My psychiatrist has literally called me a "lazy git" [NSFW language] I'm not paraphrasing. I mean literally.
I admit, I haven't been doing all the behavioural activation stuff (though it was great she didn't seem that interested in positive stuff I have been doing) lots of professionals seem to bang on about, but it's... | 1 | [
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How do you distract your brain? No matter how I try to relax or distract myself... When I do, It initially works but it quickly starts to build pressure in my brain and eventually it becomes so annoying that I can focus no more and I am back to square one.
Do you guys have some methods that work for you? | 2 | [
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She's about to get fired and I'm trying not to jump for joy (NAW) "She" is a narcissist with a slight disability at my workplace. She's finally racked up so many complaints by both employees and customers that management has no other choice but to fire her.
As lower management, I was in on the discussion and the deci... | 3 | [
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Question about sending a friend thanks Hey guys,
This thanksgiving I'm thinking about sending some sort of message (i was thinking letter but it might be too late for that) to a friend of mine across the country. Shes going to be alone for the holiday, and I wanted to reach out to her and send her some holiday cheer. S... | 4 | [
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It's 3am and I feel like absolute shit Sleep deprived af, verging on getting a cold, barely ate anything today, having the worst day I've had in a long time. Yet here I am, attempting to make myself clean the shit I was supposed to last week bc family is staying at the house this weekend and it has to get done. Fuck. | 4 | [
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She was
We went to the same college, in the same year, in the same department. We even had a few classes together. We weren't close friends..but she was an acquaintance, a classmate, an orgmate,.. a friend of a friend.
Today, she was killed together with a few others in a clash involving the rebels and the governmen... | 3 | [
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Suggestions for someone w/ anxiety studying abroad? Personal experiences? Med suggestions/experiences? I’ve posted on this sub before with a similar question around August maybe. But anyway, I'm a 20 year old female, and for the better part of my life I've suffered from anxiety and depression. More recently, my anxiety... | 2 | [
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If (or when) it ends, it all will end. [deleted] | 0 | [
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feeling horrible and ready to die hey. i'm just here to vent i guess. i'm a ftm teenager, and i have ptsd from molestation, anxiety, and depression. i've been doing much better as of late; ive gotten off one of my antidepressants, ive done better socially, and i've been feeling generally better. over the past year, ive... | 0 | [
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I’m very sad... idk why but it’s been a few days already... | 4 | [
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what do I do? Three of my friends have told me they're struggling with depression and I'm trying to offer help and support as much as I can for all three of them but the thing is..I'm really suicidal and idk how to deal with it. I don't know how to help myself and I'm not sure I'm doing a particularly good job helping ... | 0 | [
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Just Talked Myself Out of a Panic Attack. Ugh! Recovering right now from one of the worst migraines I've ever had! I started feeling lightheaded and whoozy. That usually triggers panic (a lot of my anxiety symptoms seem to correlate with physical symptoms which are linked with past trauma in my subconscious).
When th... | 2 | [
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:/ I can’t go to school. I can’t answer questions in class because if I'm wrong I'll feel bad about myself. I can't be happy with myself. | 2 | [
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Am I crazy? My current bout of depression seems to come with a feeling of self doubt about if I actually am depressed. Sometimes it feels like I'm just lying to myself about it and I'm faking it to have an excuse. The constant overthinking and worry about if I'm really truly sick makes things worse. | 4 | [
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What meds changed things for you/ hardcore meds for extreme depression? [deleted] | 4 | [
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I'm almost 25 and I feel so far behind. Throwaway account 'cause I'm. Freaking embarrassed about this, I guess. I'm 24, a woman, and stressing over the stupidest thing, it feels like I'm going through some dumb early life crisis.
I'm going to be 25 this month and it's hitting me that like. I'm still a virgin. I've nev... | 3 | [
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I want to feel good about myself That's all I want. I want to look myself in the mirror, see all of me, the good and the bad, the past and the present, the regrets and triumphs, and just tell myself "This is me, and that's good" | 4 | [
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anyone else feel like they would be suicidal even if they weren't depressed? i feel like i've got to the point where its not even that i don't see the point in living, but where I don't see the point in not dying, i guess. death is the only thing i really, really want. I don't really care for money, or love, or anythin... | 4 | [
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I wrote my doc. My lorazepam has been super hit or miss in the month since I've used it. I use roughly every 4 days on average. I've had what I'd call a roughly 55% success rate at both calming over anxious feeling, derealization, racing mind, and actual panic attacks with chest pain, breathing issues and feeling like ... | 2 | [
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Trying to remain secure Not sure how to word this,
I’m never really content with where I am. My insecurities always resurface and force me to over analyze myself when I’m with people I want to be cool with or whatever.
Does anyone else ever get that voice in the back of there head saying that you’re not enough? How do... | 4 | [
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29, single, insecure, antisocial, loner, can’t control feelings, sometimes happy, sometimes sad, I have never thought about committing suicide idk why I just get super sad, I got a good job, family, very few friends, I feel like everything is just pointless like there’s no point, that I’m alone idk. [deleted] | 4 | [
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Beta blockers and Thyroid Just been prescribed beta blockers and have been booked in for a thyroid test, anyone have any experience with beta blockers? | 2 | [
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Expectations Anybody else feel a constant pressure to live up to expectations or goals you set for yourself? Personally, I've been having panic attacks cause Im trying to teach myself philosophy/logic/pragmatism, economics, psychology, and literature at the same time by the time I graduate HS, in two years. | 2 | [
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Career anxiety I posted about this over in /r/jobs as well, but I would imagine that most people there don't get anxiety like you guys do.
I basically have lots of anxiety about my career. I have tied my self worth 100% to my level of career success. If I'm stagnated (like I think I am), it must mean I am a lousy pers... | 2 | [
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Life feels like a dream/nightmare I feel so out of touch with reality. I feel like I'm in a dream and nothing is real. It's like the fog is so thick I can't even put words to it. Does anyone else have similar feelings? | 1 | [
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Anyone get jaw pain due to constant tenseness? I had constant headaches and my doctor pointed out how tight / tense my jaws were. Edit: so I've had depression for a couple years and was diagnosed with GAD, but recently it's been super bad. I'm sorta glad I'm not the only one who's been having these tension headaches / ... | 2 | [
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DAE simulate suicide? I spend a fair amount of time pretending I have a gun in my mouth and then pulling the trigger. Then proceed to lie down pretending to be dead. Sometimes I may use my belt and strangle myself (not to any major threshold), trying to imagine what asphyxia would be like. It's very comforting to do, m... | 4 | [
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My first New Years kiss, and getting rejected. This weekend was really fun, went to LA on Saturday, came home and partied for NYE the next day.
Went to this bar with my roommate, a couple of our friends, and a friend of mine from high school (this is the girl who was my NYE kiss and then rejected me afterwards.)
Had... | 3 | [
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What is the point? What is the point of being alive if when we die we don’t remember any of it? It’s really only worth living if you are happy. Being sad, depressed, and anxious all the time is fucking miserable. I have friends and family that I care for as they care for me. All I seek is affection, someone to care for... | 0 | [
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First post - serious job anxiety, wanting to quit Hi, r/anxiety. This is my first post.
I've been dealing with anxiety for most of my life, but I started a new job six weeks ago and I'm going into a serious spiral. I dread going to work in the morning after a poor night's sleep - waking up multiple times, night sweat... | 2 | [
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Hella night time anxiety Yeah it's dark and I'm not a fan | 2 | [
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Going on first holiday with boyfriend - anxious to leave my comfort zone? Any advice would be great! | 2 | [
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What to do? Hello, im normal 19 years old guy with a normal life that decided to tell you about some things that bothers him.
GIRLS
Ive always wanted a serious relationship so circa 3 years back i started trying to find one. Since then ive met many girls but i found out im not able to fall in love or when i get more ... | 3 | [
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I'm seriously so tired I have been through so much the past few years. I'm 23, still in undergraduate at uni, and already in a LOT of debt because of how fucking dumb I've been. Now I have a part of a project due tomorrow and my partner hasn't replied to any of my texts or emails at all, and the professor for that clas... | 0 | [
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Having a tough day. Had to call out of work today for the first time in a while because of a panic attack. Nothing in particular has caused it. It's just a hard day and it's only just begun. I'm thankful for this sub and those of you who share your experiences, so on days like today I don't feel like I'm absolutely men... | 2 | [
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Every time I say to myself "I can do this" there's a little voice saying "Why? You don't matter" and I can't do this anymore I'm sorry, but I just needed to say it. It's torture. I don't know what's worse - giving up or fighting.
It's just that whenever I come up with a reason to live, whenever I assure myself that... | 0 | [
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Struggling after a miscarriage I had an early miscarriage last month. I've been sad on and off for the last couple weeks, which is totally normal. This is our first cycle trying again and my period is due this week. I've been super anxious and depressed to tht point where I can barely function the past two days. I've b... | 1 | [
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Writing to you guys from the hospital 14F here. Last night, I tightened a belt around my neck, tied it to a rack in my closet, and leaned back until I was lightheaded and saw double. I wrote a suicide note to my big brother. I’m completely fine, it was more of a gesture than a real attempt, even though the doctor’s are... | 0 | [
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Am I unhappy with him or just a bit stressed? [deleted] | 3 | [
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My S/O Doesn't Trust me to Help Her Anxiety My girlfriend and I (both late 20s) have been together for a year- she has GAD and has an attack roughly once a month. The trend seems to be that something would bother her (whether it be home, school, family, friends, me, etc) and she would internalize it and let it build in... | 2 | [
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It's so hard to focus at work, in school, or in public. [deleted] | 0 | [
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Attempting to take a big step after attempting to starve myself Some of you may have read some of the posts I’ve written these last few days... yup, I did attempt to go days without eating. I did manage almost two days without eating, but I just wanted food so badly at the end of it. I was lightheaded and sort of dizzy... | 3 | [
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Sitting in my car and wondering what I should do I know a huge part of it is because I'm out of paxil and I can't get a refill until I see my doctor next week. But I've been wondering what the point is before the meds even ran out. We can't afford December's rent, the landlady is breathing down my neck because of Novem... | 0 | [
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The key to all your problems Hey there, i would like you to give you the tools to end your suffering with this post.
Whats the reason for your suffering?
Well, thoughts.
To prove this, try this.
You can think of winning a million dollars and you will feel a positive emotion and you can imagine your family member dy... | 4 | [
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Talking in class is part of our discussion grade, I was shaking the whole time. My British literature class has about 200 people in it and as a grade we have to respond to discussion questions the professor asks in front of everyone through a microphone. She asked a question that I knew the answer to and I missed my po... | 2 | [
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I don't know how I'm going to handle this feeling for the next 60 years [deleted] | 4 | [
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How do I tell my parents I’m feeling depersonalized ? | 2 | [
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I'm trying to get a girlfriend as hard as I can, and when around this time of year my family hits me with the annual "have you found a girlfriend yet?" questions, I want to scream in their faces. [deleted] | 3 | [
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I think I'm becoming delusional. Nothing makes sense to me and everything seems so fucked up. It's so hard to look past the fact that life has no meaning and even if I try to distract myself from it, reality hits me hard. I hate how the world works. I hate how society is forcing us to change ourselves so that we can fi... | 4 | [
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I don't want the rest of my life tb this way [deleted] | 1 | [
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Helping with my girlfriend's depression Hi reddit,
i just really needed some help. my girlfriend and i have been in a Long distance relationship for about 3 years now. throughout this time she has told me the way she really benefits from being told reasons why she is loved, not worthless, cared about, etc. My problem i... | 4 | [
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Help! My cousin sounds suicidal, can you give some tips? She's lost her job a couple weeks ago that she was in for 18 years. Anyway, she was fired without being given a reason, and now I found her drunk (she doesn't drink) and she's rambling like crazy.
She's incredibly depressed and I'm not sure what she might do.
... | 0 | [
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Is it possible to feel like shit and happy at the same time? [deleted] | 4 | [
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He kissed me and I didn't push away This is so hard to write out I feel like a jerk.
Two days ago when everyone was passed out from bar hopping we were up talking on our friend's pullout couch, just shooting the shit and cracking jokes. He kept getting close; he kept whispering in my ear; he was affectionate and findi... | 3 | [
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I want to be friends with extroverted, outgoing people I'm in my last semester of university in a good major. I'm pretty smart and likely have a good career ahead of me. I have a lot of friends who I can depend on if I need help. I have a girlfriend and a stable relationship. So why do I not feel like my life is fulfil... | 3 | [
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I never knew this type of pain was physically possible [deleted] | 0 | [
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A fairy tale I wrote while crying In a land far far away lived a little princess. And she was so little that all her hopes and dreams could only be as big as she was. So she lived out her mediocre life until a witch came to her and asked her a question. "Your majesty, I see your heartache through your polite smiles. Wh... | 4 | [
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Crazy how you have to put an insane amount of work to be somewhat acceptable [deleted] | 4 | [
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Fuck it I'm day drunk, miserable, and not feelin the pills.
Fuck this shit. | 4 | [
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Realization is setting in On Canada Day in 2016 I went to a party and I was 15 turning 16 at the time. In March of 2015 I had broken off a two and a half year relationship which ended very messy and with a lot of harassment from my Ex. This happened at a time when we discovered my 10 year old sister was cutting herself... | 0 | [
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How do I find motivation to seek help? I feel like I want to wallow in my self pity and waiting until I decide that I want to die. How do I convince myself that I should go get help, if I dont want any help? | 0 | [
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