text stringlengths 31 99 | humor bool 2
classes |
|---|---|
I got hit by a truck with a camouflage paint job. it came out of nowhere. | true |
I hope you don't take this joke literally but if you do, please return it later. | true |
White house needs to support egypt and jordan with a consistent anti-terrorism strategy | false |
Guilty verdict in dharun ravi case only compounds tyler clementi tragedy | false |
This queer coming-of-age novel examines disillusionment and the fashion world | false |
Why don't electrical engineers get girls? because they can resistor. | true |
Iran halts earthquake rescue operations as survivors battle hunger and cold | false |
It's unclear if paris attackers relied on encryption. lawmakers are fighting it anyway. | false |
Mila kunis takes in dior show at paris week, shoots handbag ad (photos) | false |
It won't be easy for blue states to dodge the gop tax law | false |
Celebrity homes: exes who kept the house in their divorce | false |
Top alpine skiers shun team event at 2018 olympics | false |
We never thought we'd say this, but these skulls look good enough to eat | false |
32 million more would be uninsured under the latest senate health care bill | false |
What soup weighs the most? wanton soup. i'll leave now. | true |
Why did the scarecrow get a promotion? he was outstanding in his field! | true |
What's the quietest element? a no-bell gas. especially when the ringing noises are-gon. | true |
10 reasons you should never step foot in a shopping mall | false |
Here's evidence that thankfulness can transform your life | false |
Which religion lets you eat as much pizza as you want without getting fat? | true |
What's a ninja turtle's favorite equation? a radical equation. | true |
Ann romney's 'live! with kelly and michael' dress is pretty blinding (video) | false |
Why did he cross back? so he could charge the client for travel expenses. | true |
Why do rednecks always smell like pickles, mayonnaise, and ham? because they're inbred. | true |
No matter what happens on election day, most americans won’t be satisfied with the outcome | false |
I can kill a man with nothing but my bare gun | true |
It turns out i'm awesome at sex i come first every time! | true |
-hey don't shoot me, i'm just the messenger! -oh the letter says to shoot me? okay th- | true |
Charlotte casiraghi, more pyts who ride horses spotlighted by town & country (photos) | false |
Here's more proof that giving housing to vets prevents homelessness | false |
I ate my weight in goldfish crackers. i'm hoping to poop a shark. | true |
Bbc news: two pedestrians die in collision. fuck, how fast must they have been walking? | true |
If a mathematician were to be any part of a kitchen which would he be? the counter. | true |
Dark: whats one thing you can do in a vast quantity without bothering with the quality? genocide | true |
It would be really nice if everything was coffee. | true |
Samantha bee's 'in memoriam' for roger ailes and bill o'reilly made us cry (laughing) | false |
Action to achieve inclusive capitalism by roger martin | false |
What do you call a t-rex with tourettes? *dino-swore.* i'm sorry. | true |
'get out' thrills its way to no. 1 at the box office with $30.5 million debut | false |
In the heart of clinton country, her base's faith is unshaken | false |
Hunger games in hawaii: the islands' most glorious hotels | false |
Donald trump's plan to deport undocumented immigrants 'to be determined': aide | false |
So a man walks into a bar... it must have hurt like a sonuvabitch. | true |
Looking for the next oil boom? follow the tech | false |
Why is islam called the religion of peace? it will leave you in pieces. | true |
Please come and get your 50 pounds of pot: nj police | false |
The disappearing ghost signs of the rust belt | false |
Learn to fix the no. 1 mistake you are making in yoga practice | false |
Colin powell thinks donald trump is a 'national disgrace,' leaked emails reveal | false |
Donald trump’s first year sets record for u.s. special ops | false |
Keystone xl delay could give boost to obama's political base | false |
A nurse finds a rectal thermometer in her pocket.... ...she then exclaims some arsehole has my pen | true |
Why is mrs trump always on top? because donald can only fuck up. | true |
My girlfriend got d for christmas from her math teacher. | true |
They might as well put uhhh... in front of every item on drive-thru menus. | true |
Why isn't china a democracy? because then they'd have to hold erections. | true |
Runaways, neglect and abuse cast shadow on massachusetts school | false |
Beyonce 'standing on the sun' live: singer performs song for the first time (video) | false |
Why did the jedi cross the road? to get to the dark side. | true |
Why did the dinosaurs go extinct? because they were veloco*raptured*. | true |
Madeleine albright sounds the alarm on fascism and donald trump | false |
Alec baldwin nails it with another creepy donald trump debate impression on 'snl' | false |
What do you call a man with a spade in his head? doug. | true |
My myplate experiment made me a little neurotic, but not that healthy | false |
Her: the manager of the mcdonalds down the street called today... him: did he sound mad? | true |
Did you hear about the old italian chef? he pasta way | true |
There are only two types of people in this world people who can extrapolate from incomplete data. | true |
How to survive crisis or change as a family | false |
Ask jj: crushing your soda habit with water | false |
Rand paul and aaps want to bring you liberty.... from safe healthcare | false |
This might be the cutest attempt at the mannequin challenge ever | false |
What i learned from a college tour: visiting johns hopkins university | false |
What do you call a dog with no legs? well it don't matter i ain't coming anyway! | true |
Of course, lil' wayne isn't his real name. it's lillian waynard. | true |
How to burn 6,000 calories (like an olympian) | false |
How to spend a week in arizona, part 1: greater phoenix | false |
Tracy morgan to host 'saturday night live' this fall | false |
A parabola walked into a bar... it walked out again | true |
I bought a book on ebay called how to scam on ebay. it still hasn't arrived. | true |
What did santa say at the brothel? hoe! hoe! hoe! | true |
Table talk: 'persepolis' removed from classrooms in chicago | false |
*spreads toilet seat cover over santa's lap before sitting down* | true |
Why trevor noah thinks hillary clinton will never connect with people | false |
We all sprang from apes, but you didn't spring far enough. | true |
Masturbation is like procrastination... ...in the end you're just fucking yourself | true |
Some people are like clouds.. ..once they fuck off it's a nice day. | true |
White house forced to release some visitor logs in legal settlement | false |
What do you call a pirates thong? a whispering eye patch. | true |
There's no such thing as a stupid opinion. said the world's first feminist | true |
As he slaughters civilians in aleppo, bashar assad prepares to make nice with donald trump | false |
How do you milk sheeps? with apple accessories. | true |
Here's a knock knock joke about the guy with no arms | true |
Nsa leaker's parents say they fear for her safety | false |
Think watching paint dry is boring? you know what, you're boring | false |
Buy tickets: join us at the next third metric event | false |
Know the best part about dead baby jokes? they never get old... | true |
*uses mr. clean magic eraser to wipe off your drawn on eyebrows* | true |
My tombstone will read i should have googled it first. | true |
Online bank rates rise higher above the rest | false |
Do you want me to rap? i will rap! - how i threaten my kids | true |
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