text stringlengths 31 99 | humor bool 2
classes |
|---|---|
You miss 100% of the shots you don't take. - neighborhood drunk | true |
'the hunger games' weekend box office: $155 million | false |
Did you know there is a dating website for amphetamine addicts? speeddating.com | true |
The world snail racing championship happened, and we have a winner (video) | false |
I lost weight: cathy sheargold wanted to experience life with her son and lost nearly 200 pounds | false |
Why are flowering plants such good test takers? because they have all of the anthers! | true |
Why does peter pan always fly? because he neverlands! you're welcome. | true |
An ms-stricken doctor changes her diet... and reverses her 'irreversible' decline | false |
Queer rock camp is about more than music. it's about identity. | false |
John oliver shows why your credit report is a total nightmare | false |
Did you hear about the man who died at the spaghetti factory? he's with the angel hair now. | true |
What car does boba fett drive? a mandelorean. | true |
Some things are better left unsaid, but i'm probably gonna get drunk and say them anyway. | true |
John lewis blasts steve king's 'bigoted and racist' comments | false |
Women in their 30s are now having more babies than those in their 20s | false |
What do you call a pikachu caught in brazil? a zikachu | true |
Ok *buzzer* t: what th j: so close! it's o-'a'-k t: but... j: hard luck, kid | true |
11 warning signs you may have a problem with alcohol | false |
Michelle wolf renews hostilities with sarah huckabee sanders | false |
Food lies: the wackiest things our parents told us | false |
A cup of joe must mean something else entirely to a cannibal. | true |
Marco rubio calls donald trump 'a con artist' | false |
Knock knock who's there ? clown ! clown who ? clown for the count ! | true |
So i added paul walker on xbox live yesterday.... sadly he spends all his time on the dashboard | true |
Ny daily news' colin myler to depart; jim rich to take over | false |
I was diagnosed with breast cancer and decided to do nothing | false |
What would you do if you were a ghost? | true |
Doctor doctor i swallowed a bone. are you choking? no i really did! | true |
A termite walks into a bar and asks where is the bar tender? | true |
The clear history button in your browser has saved more lives than superman. | true |
Today is a very special day. the one day a year i can say i have a girl. | true |
When politicians struggle to find a pathway to peace, business must step it up | false |
If she says, i'm ok, you're fine. if she says, i'm fine, you're not ok. | true |
If iron man is a superhero what's iron woman? a command | true |
I'm not doing anything cheesy for my girlfriend on valentines day... she's lactose intolerant. | true |
I raped a blind woman the other day. she didn't see me coming. | true |
Flavorwire: 10 great novels and the cocktails you should pair them with | false |
I like my coffee like i like my women without a penis | true |
What did the daschund say when he was neutered? auf weinersehen | true |
Never underestimate the power of carefully worded nonsense. | true |
'game of thrones' walking tours offered in northern ireland and croatia | false |
Proof the actresses of shondaland are just as badass as the characters they play | false |
Have you heard about the sensitive burglar? he takes things personally. | true |
What did the gay guy say to the scared straight guys? you guys are fucking pussies! | true |
When you tell someone that you're asexual... you then have two people who do not give a fuck. | true |
How does a moel make his money? he collects the tips. | true |
Have you heard about the corduroy pillow? i hear it's making headlines | true |
#weekinlgbt with rob smith: the 'ex-gay' video, lgbt veterans, and rose mcgowan | false |
Q. what did the dog say when he sat on sand paper? a. rough rough. | true |
The trump empire expands as conflicts of interest pile up | false |
Netflix officially cuts ties with kevin spacey on ‘house of cards’ | false |
Divorce reasons: taiwanese woman divorces husband over small penis | false |
What does a man with no honey do? he cantaloupe. | true |
Viola davis wears her natural hair at the 2012 oscars (photo, poll) | false |
We are part of 'the system,' too: keeping our autistic children safe | false |
Garment care and repair are important to a stylish life | false |
Whats white with red stripes and crawls slowly over the floor? freshly whipped masochist! | true |
Why did adele cross the street? to say hello.... from the other side. | true |
A meal for all senses: tagine in morocco | false |
Why isn't helen keller a good driver? because she's dead. | true |
8 things you need to know about 'inherent vice' right now | false |
Nancy pelosi says republicans are 'stonewalling' investigation into trump's russia ties | false |
Ah st patrick's day i better eat some irish food *pours self bowl of lucky charms* | true |
One of the wheelchair basketball team players has been tested positive for wd40 :( | true |
These were the cutest kids on 'the ellen degeneres show' this season | false |
Maryland man arrested for trying to aid isis | false |
What did the cashew say to the sneezing peanut? yes, what is it? | true |
Scott walker leads gop governors' calls for congress to allow food stamp drug tests | false |
Why america is dropping bombs to defend erbil | false |
What's the gummy stuff between sharks teeth? slow swimmers. | true |
Office morale has increased noticeably since we put a tarp over dave's body | true |
Bad advice to give a kleptomaniac... you should really take something for that. | true |
My atheist friend let out a sneeze... damn you, i responded. | true |
Awesome nurse knits tiny halloween costumes for babies in the nicu | false |
John lewis calls for federal observers to be placed at polling stations on election day | false |
Jeh johnson agrees with obama's refusal to call isis 'radical islam' | false |
2015's model of the year isn't gigi or kendall | false |
What do you call an aardvark that's been thrown out of a pub? a barredvark! | true |
One direction broke up everything was just going south. | true |
A way of life at risk on the anniversary of the bp oil spill | false |
Russell westbrook hit a beautiful game winner last night | false |
Stevie wonder walks into a bar... then a table, then a chair. | true |
What do you get when you stick your dick in yogurt without asking first? rape culture. | true |
Why the rabbits love selena gomez? im farting carrots, im farting carrots... | true |
Elisabeth moss: fred armisen is best at impersonating a 'normal person' | false |
If there's ever an apocalypse, you'll recognize me because i'll be the zombie wearing flip flops | true |
Why i diy: 5 reasons everyone should build their own furniture | false |
Stay cool and be chilled (even in the summer) | false |
What did the blanket say when it fell off the bed? oh sheeeeeettttt! | true |
Why are farmers cruel? because they pull corn by the ears. | true |
Watch: this company is cutting food waste and boosting community health | false |
What's the difference between a raft guide and a large pizza? a large pizza can feed a family. | true |
Wanna know what makes me smile? face muscles | true |
How does a vampire get through life with only one fang? he has to grin and bare it. | true |
Sarah palin slams donald trump's carrier deal as 'crony capitalism' | false |
World health organization’s junk diagnosis for 'gaming disorder' trivializes mental illness | false |
What is harry potter's favorite way to get down a hill? walking. j.k, rolling. | true |
What do you call it when strippers hold a fundraiser for the tattooing arts? tits for tats | true |
You have beautiful eyes. too bad they're attached to the head of a stark raving lunatic. | true |
Once upon a time there was a yellow frog and a pink elephant... | true |
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