start_date stringlengths 10 10 | end_date stringlengths 10 10 | thread_id stringlengths 8 10 ⌀ | subreddit stringclasses 1
value | subreddit_id stringclasses 1
value | total_score int64 -564 194k | text stringlengths 52 58.9k | num_messages int64 3 160 | avg_score float64 -55.17 14.3k |
|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|
1630187518 | 1630254959 | t3_pdiq0u | t5_2to41 | 43 | [deleted]: [deleted by user]
[removed]
kriechentod1: FYI, her dad knows, he just wanted to end the quarrel fast and without questioms because is awkward
Lily_Roza: He just hasn't decided what to do. So, for now, he followed Mom's cues.
They are probably going to talk to her about it. And my guess is they can read her... | 4 | 10.75 | |
1630187682 | 1630189757 | t3_pdirlb | t5_2to41 | 123 | xXMadSmacksXx83: Tifu by playfully shoving my wife and losing a chunk of my toe on the clapback.
Obligatory this happened last night. I'm airing out the wound and changing bandages today.
My wife (27F) and I, (29M) went out last night for dinner and drinks. It'd been a long week and we've been raising a new rescue pup... | 3 | 41 | |
1630189980 | 1630239966 | t3_pdjehm | t5_2to41 | 113 | [deleted]: TIFU by getting what I asked for.
[removed]
bluenovarising: I understand what you’re going through, in a different way. I have depression and have been having thoughts of, what’s the point? What is my end goal? I’m a 33 year old woman whose never been in a relationship. I feel very alone and isolated, and I’... | 4 | 28.25 | |
1630195823 | 1630253337 | t3_pdkyon | t5_2to41 | 38,585 | ThePurpleLaptop: TIFU: I thought the smell in my kitchen was from my fridge.
TW: Death
Obligatory on mobile, and this happened a few days ago.
So I live in a triplex with my boyfriend, and the other two units are occupied by an elderly man (same floor, entrance to his unit is on the other side of the building), and ... | 14 | 2,756.071429 | |
1630196130 | 1630199816 | t3_pdl1jh | t5_2to41 | 3 | [deleted]: TIFU by falling in love with someone who wasn't my wife!
[deleted]
[deleted]: You had options before — you would have likely won 50/50 custody if you had simply walked away to begin with. But now she has proof of potential infidelity. You fucked yourself man.
Defiant_Hurry2985: 50/50 states do not care why ... | 4 | 0.75 | |
1630190686 | 1630262619 | t3_pdjlmn | t5_2to41 | 2,221 | meteraider: TIFU By asking a coworker how his GFs driving test went....
This happened a few years ago but me and another coworker accidently triggered one of our coworkers. We have a small work place/shop where everyone's business is constantly spread around. So a coworker of ours recently started dating a girl after... | 8 | 277.625 | |
1630200469 | 1630205103 | t3_pdm58m | t5_2to41 | 57 | [deleted]: TIFU by being too frugal
[deleted]
31spiders: Unless you both have the EXACT same spending……fuck that guy! How does he know your rent isn’t higher than his? Or car payment? Or you end up buying higher quality groceries? Or have a different cable package…etc etc etc. Don’t apologize, don’t even attempt to mak... | 3 | 19 | |
1630204946 | 1630264946 | t3_pdn82l | t5_2to41 | 80 | FavcolorisREDdit: TIFU by accidentally choking my gf
Was having an insane nightmare that there was an ugly bald dude in a white butcher apron peeping through a wall looking at my girl, I was completely committed to killing him I was determined that it was a good enough reason due to trespassing and peeping from anoth... | 5 | 16 | |
1630205308 | 1630222379 | t3_pdnbaf | t5_2to41 | 20 | Majestic_Dig_7420: TIFU by putting someone's irreplaceable belongings on the curb
The realisation happened an hour ago, but the actual act of the fuck up happened yesterday.
Quick backstory:
My ex and I split up, but he decided we can stick together until my visa gets confirmed. This is a grand gesture of him and I lo... | 4 | 5 | |
1630205444 | 1630206346 | t3_pdncfu | t5_2to41 | 5 | [deleted]: [deleted by user]
[removed]
Animehoonter: That is their fault for not letting you know
Napalm_Nancy_Yeet: They may have been keeping their relationship secret for personal reasons or didn't want to turn me down and felt bad
Animehoonter: Still, not your fault
| 4 | 1.25 | |
1630206701 | 1630267511 | t3_pdnn7v | t5_2to41 | 167 | moopybazinga: TIFU by holding a baby
This happened a couple days ago.
So, my gf agreed to help some friends out by being the respite for their 3 week old baby boy from the foster system while they took a short vacation. He's a baby whose mom was on meth. I agreed to help by house sitting for them, feed the dogs, etc.... | 9 | 18.555556 | |
1630166344 | 1630254757 | t3_pdcen5 | t5_2to41 | 4 | [deleted]: [deleted by user]
[removed]
Radiant-Art3448: Thats a pretty fishy story but thanks for the laugh! And can you imagine if it would have had anchovies?
bigfatbeard: *vurps* gross.
| 3 | 1.333333 | |
1630204506 | 1630246636 | t3_pdn4bi | t5_2to41 | 25 | ricehater82821: TIFU by Making Rice
I didn't even want rice today. I wanted to make pad Thai. But, since I like bringing pad Thai leftovers to work, I figured that would be a better meal for tomorrow night. Eh, might as well make rice instead. Plus, I've had a very stressful week so it'll be nice to have a dinner with ... | 3 | 8.333333 | |
1630211789 | 1630294633 | t3_pdot6k | t5_2to41 | 5,426 | am112898: TIFU by accidentally saying no when my fiancé was proposing.
Edit: No one has our permission to repost this on any platform.
So I’ve known my fiancé was going to propose for awhile. We went ring shopping a few months ago and he even told me when he ordered it. However, I had absolutely no idea when or how i... | 8 | 678.25 | |
1630213459 | 1630223842 | t3_pdp6e1 | t5_2to41 | 23 | Blackdynamite013: TIFU by Giving My Wife 6 Grams of Psilocybin Mushrooms
Ok. First and foremost. We both took 6 Grams of Golden Teacher.
So awhile back my wife and I decided we wanted to try magic mushrooms, but didn't know where or how to buy any. So, I decided to venture down the long road of growing them myself. A... | 7 | 3.285714 | |
1630214641 | 1630219188 | t3_pdpfen | t5_2to41 | 73 | SQUID_FLOTILLA: TIFU by playing ridiculously sexual music for our 7-year-old girl.
TLDR at the bottom.
Happened today. Holy fuck my wife is pissed at me... and we are now trying to explain porn words to our 7-year-old daughter.
Me: “I just worked out on our elliptical machine. I’m gonna take a shower.”
My wife: ”We ... | 4 | 18.25 | |
1630216097 | 1630217758 | t3_pdpq6d | t5_2to41 | 6 | [deleted]: [deleted by user]
[removed]
[deleted]: Sounds like everything is fine. You shot your shot, she let you down easy and that’s just the way it is. All you can really do is continue to work on yourself and if she has a change of heart she will let you know somehow. In the meantime you can continue interacting in... | 3 | 2 | |
1630221339 | 1630222212 | t3_pdqqo9 | t5_2to41 | 43 | MisterDango: TIFU by having IBS and chewing gum (Fair warning: Gross)
[removed]
HockeyCookie: Omg never trust a fart. It's always has friends that want to leave the party. A great party in your pants always sounds amazing, but your 95% guaranteed to not be the bell of the ball. Squat, and live another day.
MisterDango:... | 4 | 10.75 | |
1630221947 | 1630225941 | t3_pdquy3 | t5_2to41 | 43 | [deleted]: TIFU by asking my partner to rate me
[deleted]
Fhalala: Never ask a question you don’t really want to know the answer to.
javainthethamel: yup lesson learnt
| 3 | 14.333333 | |
1630223072 | 1630253383 | t3_pdr2mk | t5_2to41 | 438 | [deleted]: Tifu by texting my ex that I still love him.
[deleted]
Active-Subject267: Absolutely ridiculous that they would force a hospital stay on you for the most simple and mundane text ever. Are they footing the bill for this??
throwayahwue839: Health insurance is free, where I live
Magyarharcos: Ah, the age old as... | 7 | 62.571429 | |
1630231814 | 1630286283 | t3_pdso0w | t5_2to41 | 56 | [deleted]: TIFU by not realizing my best friend (F) of 10 years had feelings for me
[deleted]
Clive23p: Stay in contact.
Apologize.
Don't be a little bitch. Own your mistake and talk it out.
MrNoName_ishere: tried to, she won't budge
Clive23p: Then try again.
She gave you 10 years.
Your turn.
MrNoName_ishere: All ... | 13 | 4.307692 | |
1630232462 | 1630242113 | t3_pdssh2 | t5_2to41 | 34 | UnfairLaugh5730: TIFU by walking naked onto my girlfriend’s grandparents
Didn’t happen today, but about 4 months ago. Even though it makes me feel uncomfortable to meet them again.
Me - 21 male
My gf - 20 female
Story: I started dating my current girlfriend before Christmas 2020. Everything is fine - we’re still hap... | 3 | 11.333333 | |
1630236195 | 1630236376 | t3_pdtis7 | t5_2to41 | 17 | Lafateverything: TIFU Falling off a dock at work
Picked up the COVID and was out for 2 weeks mandatory then an additional week because I was not getting much better but finally back at work which made me happy because I really enjoy my job.
Truck arrives and we unload it but the gate on the ramp gets stuck. Not uncomm... | 3 | 5.666667 | |
1630239739 | 1630346915 | t3_pdu9x7 | t5_2to41 | 470 | blueskyn01se: TIFU by wiping the operating system from my computer while being a tier 3 technical engineer.
TLDR I tried to transfer my OS to a new drive, wiped the old one, and totally destroyed my computer’s ability to boot when I really should know better.
I do advanced troubleshooting for a living. I’ve been work... | 8 | 58.75 | |
1630240793 | 1630241316 | t3_pduifq | t5_2to41 | 9 | [deleted]: TIFU by smacking my head off my wall after cumming too hard.
[deleted]
LellePolis: Funniest shit i've ever read
GrimReaapaa: “So I came with the force of a thousands suns”
Brilliant..
Im more like strength of a thousand guinea pigs
| 3 | 3 | |
1630243915 | 1630268458 | t3_pdva8x | t5_2to41 | 11,606 | [deleted]: TIFU by scolding my employees on a Sunday.
[deleted]
Dontjudgemeforasking: What the hell is this comment section?
Sounds like you made an honest fuck up, it happens. You apologized to the people you reached out to, like an adult, so good on you. Bring donuts or whatever in the morning and have a good laugh... | 12 | 967.166667 | |
1630245431 | 1630262901 | t3_pdvoqw | t5_2to41 | 11 | Throwawayvacation69: TIFU - by not taking action
[removed]
Supremecowboy: I’m callin you cold feet
Throwawayvacation69: more like not tryin to come across as a creep with other people around, but tis cool. My feet were pretty chilly that day.
| 3 | 3.666667 | |
1630248053 | 1630251854 | t3_pdwgg2 | t5_2to41 | 23 | [deleted]: TIFU by not texting the girl I was almost in a relation with and losing her
[deleted]
bigdaddygray: It's perfectly normal to not be texting a new s/o while on vacation. Who is texting on vacation? If you two clicked that well, I doubt they lost interest soley based on time. Seems more like they thought they ... | 4 | 5.75 | |
1630249261 | 1630249667 | t3_pdwth1 | t5_2to41 | 5 | TheLordStocc_GG: TIFU by mistaking eyeblech for eyebleach
So today i was scrolling threw reddit because we
all have no life when i decided i wanted to shut my
screaming brother up. So i was thinking of some
interesting subreddits and decided to go with the most
wholesome one. So fpr context my wifi is poop because
of t... | 3 | 1.666667 | |
1630248680 | 1630260057 | t3_pdwn6e | t5_2to41 | 352 | [deleted]: [deleted by user]
[removed]
Elven_Rabbit: Which one of you is the big dildo for, though?
BugzOnMyNugz: It's double sided
aromaticbotanist: Ass to ass
Mcnulty91: By the law of the land this ought to be downvoted, but take my visceral reaction and my upvote instead
CoffeeBeanx3: Actually, ass to ass is a very ... | 8 | 44 | |
1630252452 | 1630272199 | t3_pdxt2a | t5_2to41 | 46 | [deleted]: [deleted by user]
[removed]
builtbybama_rolltide: From someone that worked EMS you did the right thing. Cardiac is always transported no matter how insignificant we might think it is. We don’t underlying medical issues and we aren’t doctors so we might be wrong. If we had arrived, talked to you and you told... | 3 | 15.333333 | |
1630256470 | 1630258119 | t3_pdz2ye | t5_2to41 | -1 | [deleted]: TIFU By making an anti military comment in a community facebook group.
[deleted]
FedsRWatchin: I'm guessing you have no friends. If you had friends you would know someone in the military and wouldn't feel that way.
frankgrimes1: I have a few, even military ones, they all think recruiters are scum.
f0rg0tten1... | 4 | -0.25 | |
1630255302 | 1630258413 | t3_pdypfu | t5_2to41 | 39 | Panda_with_issues: TIFU by trying to order skip the dishes
Obligatory didnt happen today, but yesterday. I'm currently self isolating at the hotel, and honestly the food isn't great so I decided to order delivery. Skip the dishes is currently the only food delivery service available in my area but whatever once I get f... | 3 | 13 | |
1630257585 | 1630264695 | t3_pdzfrz | t5_2to41 | 6 | [deleted]: [deleted by user]
[removed]
Pwydde: The word you're looking for is [merkin](https://www.mustacheparlor.com/merkins)
[deleted]: HAHAHAHAH
| 3 | 2 | |
1630259774 | 1630264992 | t3_pe0511 | t5_2to41 | 36 | Smirkydarkdude: TIFU By accusing a biker gang of stealing my wife's cell phone
The wife and I decided to get in one (possibly) last boat ride yesterday and headed out to Ghost Lake where our boat lives. After a nice ride, we loaded the pups into the car and headed home. There were hundreds of Hell's Angel type bikers... | 5 | 7.2 | |
1630259856 | 1630261758 | t3_pe05xy | t5_2to41 | 10 | [deleted]: TIFU: By calling animal control
[deleted]
lilmikeyboy: Don’t get too worked up. I have had many a meth head neighbor in my day and understand where you are coming from. These problems usually take care of themselves. One of my neighbors in particular finally got moved due to charges. This guy we will call “T... | 3 | 3.333333 | |
1630261048 | 1630278373 | t3_pe0joq | t5_2to41 | 34 | throwwatwtacc8282: TIFU by sending my Crush a love letter.
I'm 16F. He's. 17M.
I met him 2 years ago, we hung out a few times, and that was it. Ever since I had like the biggest crush on him, and it's getting really tiring because I'm too shy to talk to him, and I really want to get over him.
So, I asked my therapist... | 4 | 8.5 | |
1630260733 | 1630308120 | t3_pe0g6z | t5_2to41 | 30,100 | nos6ix: TIFU by having a date with a girl from the pet store and ended up having to explain to the cops why she's not breathing in my lobby
Strap yourselves in ladies and gentlemen. You're in for a ride.
I posted this in a comment thread of r/ask and people on there requested I put it on "somewhere this story will get... | 23 | 1,308.695652 | |
1630259667 | 1630989584 | t3_pe03uk | t5_2to41 | 20 | enutz777: TIFU by using the name of my old cable company
This was years ago. My wife and I had moved 1300 miles to a new city. This was her phone call with her new boss who was awkward with anything related to sex.
Wife: Hey boss, just wanted to let you know I am going to be later than anticipated because I am waitin... | 4 | 5 | |
1630262613 | 1630273730 | t3_pe11h1 | t5_2to41 | 213 | TheCrimsonnerGinge: TIFU by eating the wrong jelly beans
Set the stage; I have been working for a few months in an area with a reputation for alcoholism for long-term occupants. I enjoy a good beer from time to time. I also enjoy a bad beer. In the immortal words of Psychostick, "Beer is good".
When I was shopping for... | 6 | 35.5 | |
1630268504 | 1630280451 | t3_pe2x35 | t5_2to41 | 57 | [deleted]: TIFU and filled my house with hornets
[deleted]
melharris293: Did you get stung?
Are you renting or do you own the home?
Crum216: Luckly I didn’t get stung but I just bought the house 6 months ago…..
Tigeress4: I would have a talk with your realtor about information disclosure, and shouldn't the Home requir... | 5 | 11.4 | |
1630268597 | 1630339728 | t3_pe2y2x | t5_2to41 | 376 | HigherFalcon: TIFU by falling asleep with a cigarette in my hand
This happened 20 minutes ago.
Tomorrow my shift starts at 2pm, i didn't get much sleep today, so decided to head to my room to sleep early around 9pm, normally i sleep at 3am.
Before sleeping i decided to light up a cigarette and smoke it while laying i... | 5 | 75.2 | |
1630274703 | 1630275950 | t3_pe4ueq | t5_2to41 | 8 | ContainmentOperator: TIFU by pushing myself too much on a girl, getting rejected hard.
So the rejection happened today. And I am obviously feeling really bad about it.
So about 2 weeks ago, I met a girl online who seemed really nice. We add each other and start talking about random shit.
We seemed to share lots of thi... | 4 | 2 | |
1630271597 | 1630278610 | t3_pe3w4v | t5_2to41 | 14 | whomst8myass: Tifu by making a mess
So today was my last day at my job. I was planning on asking a girl I worked with out. She is one of those super nice people and she had made me some cake for my last day, but she didn’t work today. She instead invited me to her house after work. I got there and she invited me in. Af... | 3 | 4.666667 | |
1630275276 | 1630278599 | t3_pe50ks | t5_2to41 | 23 | Lessian: TIFU! Never leave keys in your door from the outside.
Before I get into the details of my incompetence, some details.
First off I live in supported living with two other vulnerable adults, in this house, we have 24/7 support. Two of the staff are old (one of my main concerns) and one of the other tenants is..... | 8 | 2.875 | |
1630275895 | 1630329438 | t3_pe575f | t5_2to41 | 457 | Raised_via_chancla: TIFU by thinking my wife is a burglar
I (m29) don’t function well when I wake up startled. The first few moments are always very hazy, and that’s not great for actual emergencies like a fire for example. It also doesn’t help that I have two kids, a two year old and 5 year old, that are horrendous sl... | 4 | 114.25 | |
1630280141 | 1630281576 | t3_pe6ff4 | t5_2to41 | 23 | [deleted]: TIFU by giving a guy a blowjob at work.
[deleted]
Str8_Circle: dude, don’t you know you’re supposed to get busy in a Burger King bathroom. Shock G wept.
FakeNewsOftheGalaxy: The humpty dance is yo chance!!!
| 3 | 7.666667 | |
1630283896 | 1630315643 | t3_pe7g2u | t5_2to41 | 25 | toelickage: TIFU by asking my bf to open the window
Apologies that this is long and for formating, doing it on phone.
So bf and I are laying in bed and I asked him to open the window and curtains (so the light in the morning will help me get up)
He stands there for a bit once they're open and is seemingly looking out ... | 3 | 8.333333 | |
1630285668 | 1630342206 | t3_pe7wn4 | t5_2to41 | 11,554 | havindayr: TIFU by showing a customer a bikini clad anime ass
I (23F) recently started working at a gas station that sells the usual lotto, cigs, drinks, candy, basic convenience stuff etc. We have a regular guy (approx 50M) that comes in to get lotto at least once an hour. I don't know his name, he told me his name wa... | 14 | 825.285714 | |
1630325710 | 1630326562 | t3_pe8vf6 | t5_2to41 | 2 | Thoroughly-Whelmed: That’s not a success, that’s just the bare minimum expected behavior of being an adult.
BlankMyName: Stop tearing others down. As an introvert I can confirm that asking someone out is a success. And her saying yes is a confidence builder.
Thoroughly-Whelmed: >stop tearing others down
No
| 3 | 0.666667 | |
1630290249 | 1630309000 | t3_pe93es | t5_2to41 | 44 | [deleted]: TIFU by sleeping in a thong.
[deleted]
Jewel-jones: Really rude of them to just bust in. You’re a grown man. She could have seen a lot worse. And then rifling through your drawers?? She doesn’t respect any boundaries, much weirder than anything you’ve done.
yd33zy816: It’s the parents house I hate when some... | 7 | 6.285714 | |
1630289807 | 1655077564 | t3_pe8zb5 | t5_2to41 | 86 | voluptuousvegetables: TIFU by sleepwalking
Obligatory this happened two days ago, but I am still rectifying the situation.
I (30 F) have been known to sleepwalk. I did it a lot while growing up, but it has calmed down in adulthood and I now only do it on occasion.
Saturday morning I woke up and went to my master bat... | 4 | 21.5 | |
1630289228 | 1630352602 | t3_pe8tpt | t5_2to41 | 16 | misskittypie: TIFU by working out in the grass and almost dying
Not today, but Friday morning IFU. I was doing mandatory group PT (physical training) on a tennis court. Normally we exercise on the grass or a softball field. My previous experiences with tennis courts tell me they are rough on my hands, elbows, and knees... | 3 | 5.333333 | |
1630292857 | 1630352508 | t3_pe9r8u | t5_2to41 | 90 | narrow_octopus: TIFU by beyond severely overcooking our dinner
Welp I'm a bonehead. Yesterday I told my wife I would cook us dinner the next day (today) so last night I put 4 absolutely gorgeous thick frozen pork chops In the fridge to defrost. I checked them this morning and they were perfect looking.
Tonight my wif... | 7 | 12.857143 | |
1630295004 | 1630297475 | t3_peaadq | t5_2to41 | 74 | iliveoutasuitcase: TIFU buying doughnuts for my work colleagues
Standard this didn’t happen today, few years ago.
I used to tour as a technician for a theatre show. We had a rule that was if you’re ever going to be late, you better bring doughnuts.
Pretty good, solid policy, you’re late but everyone gets a snack, all ... | 3 | 24.666667 | |
1630295519 | 1630307547 | t3_peaen1 | t5_2to41 | 7 | [deleted]: TIFU by using airplane bathroom for beauty routine.
[deleted]
spankybacon: Probably could have told them to knock and you will come out if someone needs it while you're getting ready.
Great story. Super cute
Kyra_Heiker: Yeah, I didn't want to be juggling everything and having someone knock when in the mid... | 4 | 1.75 | |
1630298833 | 1630324171 | t3_peb71w | t5_2to41 | 69 | [deleted]: [deleted by user]
[removed]
EwokGodfather: Yeah, I remember fondly the first time I tried crystal and felt like I could take on the world.
Hmu when you hear the voices and see the shadow ppl. I'm clean a year next month.
kigoh: just popped by to say it's great to hear your clean!
| 3 | 23 | |
1630300393 | 1630359355 | t3_pebk68 | t5_2to41 | 57 | [deleted]: [deleted by user]
[removed]
hettiegreen: Look if she's sending emails in the middle of the night she's probably overworked and underpaid.
I have friends the same age in the same profession that have told me the horror stories of the little shits they have to deal with, the hours they work, the stuff they ha... | 6 | 9.5 | |
1630301721 | 1630344780 | t3_pebura | t5_2to41 | 17 | gimme_all_da_dogs: TIFU leaving a window open without a screen
Obligatory this did not happen today, but it was in the wee hours of the morning yesterday. TLDR at the end.
I am currently on vacation with my family in a small town we have stayed in for a week the last 14 years, I feel pretty comfortable here. Its a sma... | 4 | 4.25 | |
1630297318 | 1630324950 | t3_peaubk | t5_2to41 | 15 | DaytonaDune: TIFU by getting drunk with my co-workers
So, because of the nature of my work i often have to spend time with my co-workers outside of work and because of my work and who my co-workers are, alcohol is often involved. I dont mind this, hell i love it but sometimes it can go a bit of the rails when the right... | 3 | 5 | |
1630304541 | 1630308777 | t3_pecgab | t5_2to41 | 77 | Loam_Lion: TIFU by hitting a dog, right in front of it's owner
With my car. And I fucking hate myself. I love all animals so this hurts every part of me, deeply. It's ~20 past midnight now and this was a ~50 minutes ago. I was gonna pick up one of my best friends from work. I saw this lady pass the end of my driveway w... | 5 | 15.4 | |
1630315389 | 1630363271 | t3_peek68 | t5_2to41 | 13,549 | [deleted]: TIFU by going on a spontaneous tinder date without knowing the person and ending up being a babysitter for a drunk wreck.
Like most of these posts, this happened years ago.
Strap yourselves in random internet friends, this one is a rollercoaster. It may be long, but it's well worth it.
So years back I decid... | 11 | 1,231.727273 | |
1630317958 | 1630344901 | t3_pef3dl | t5_2to41 | 8 | [deleted]: Tifu: I used fake pee for a drug test and they also drew my real blood.
[deleted]
Active-Subject267: Ugh I hate to freak you out but I found similar answers on multiple sites:
"Blood and urine tests during a life insurance medical test screen for dozens of health indicators and conditions, such as:
HIV and... | 5 | 1.6 | |
1630280140 | 1630340741 | t3_pe6fep | t5_2to41 | 13 | [deleted]: TIFU by cutting my nails while smoking a cigarette
[deleted]
Keen_Eye_Eli: ......you sound gross. I'm no prize but....wow.
MercilessIdiot: >......you sound *like a man*. I'm no prize but....wow.
Fixed
Keen_Eye_Eli: Whatever helps you sleep at night
MercilessIdiot: >......you sound *vodka*. I'm no priz... | 5 | 2.6 | |
1630319729 | 1630335537 | t3_pefh0w | t5_2to41 | 1,036 | tessislurking: TIFU by taking a poo in the woods
Tldr at bottom
I love spending time outside. Wild camping, woodland walks, hiking, you name it and I love it.
Yesterday, I took my partner on a surprise woodland walk where you had a to find a secret blue door off the side of the road. The door leads to picturesque wo... | 5 | 207.2 | |
1630327094 | 1630348922 | t3_peh95b | t5_2to41 | 130 | jigglethesepuffs: TIFU by scaring a friend in the toilet
Obligatory didn’t happen today etc etc.
My friend and I went to watch a horror movie in the cinemas. Decided why not? Cinemas are dark and have that creepy feeling, and late sessions mean overly anxious driving at night on the way home!!
After the movie was don... | 7 | 18.571429 | |
1630330008 | 1630648892 | t3_pei20z | t5_2to41 | 2,744 | FlagrantSoybean: TIFU* by seriously overreacting to a sign and threatening to beat some ass
I am strongly irreligious. When my tween daughter decided to join a teen church group, I was cautious but wanted her to figure out religion for herself. So weeks followed with her midweek and Sunday trips to the church with her ... | 13 | 211.076923 | |
1630332472 | 1630332856 | t3_peit29 | t5_2to41 | 83 | ForYourInformation1: TIFU by going to the Belgium Grand Prix with a client
TIFU by going to the Belgium Grand Prix.
Of course this happened yesterday but I didn't have the time to post.
I (36f) was asked by a client to go with him to the GP. It sounded like a really good time and nothing like my usual work. I am a car... | 3 | 27.666667 | |
1630331581 | 1630350210 | t3_peiiw3 | t5_2to41 | 10 | [deleted]: TIFU by drunkenly jumping off a porch deck to win a race.
[deleted]
unknowngodess: I hope you have a speedy recovery!
Illustrious_One_2170: Just try not, to short cut the recovery.
| 3 | 3.333333 | |
1630333626 | 1630637736 | t3_pej6ap | t5_2to41 | 28 | Bubfool: TIFU by using my work computer to look at porn.
OK, so I tried to look at porn on my work computer. My company changed IT vendors and the old company didn't give a shit about anything. The other night I was home and I was too lazy to go get my personal laptop, I decided to do a bit of looking and I noticed t... | 4 | 7 | |
1630332347 | 1630338706 | t3_peirnf | t5_2to41 | 8 | [deleted]: [deleted by user]
[removed]
[deleted]: Rather than waste time and money at a bad school, take a gap year and reapply to better universities next year.
Perceus03: I considered this u got my ranks in 6000 out of 100000. But the cut off for Good colleges close at 2500 so it's unlikely I'll be able to do any bet... | 4 | 2 | |
1630337386 | 1630352020 | t3_pekdvo | t5_2to41 | 43 | IPostOnOccasion: TIFU by biting an elephant ear stalk for shits and giggles
Obligatory this didn’t happen today, but 3 days ago. Just thinking about it and immersing myself in my stupidity a bit still. I live in an apartment with my cousin and last week a friend of mine came into town to get ready for the next school y... | 4 | 10.75 | |
1630337252 | 1630346463 | t3_pekccb | t5_2to41 | 51 | MikalMooni: TIFU by eating Devil’s Tongue as my first TRULY hot pepper!
Like many other posts on this sub, this story starts yesterday, but sadly this is a multi-day problem I’m gonna have to deal with. So, it all starts with my neighbour, a 30-something year-old Polish immigrant we’re gonna call ‘Warsaw’ for the purpo... | 4 | 12.75 | |
1630337787 | 1630341219 | t3_pekikv | t5_2to41 | 5 | Not_the_Boshy: TIFU by not letting some family members into their own house (and assuming my dad was going to molest me)
[removed]
kaisrice: I genuinely can’t tell if this is real or satirical
Not_the_Boshy: It's a real story :\\
If it were satirical, what (or who) would I be poking fun at?
| 3 | 1.666667 | |
1630337897 | 1631372147 | t3_pekjwe | t5_2to41 | 6 | [deleted]: TIFU by getting to excited about state fair
[deleted]
KinglyQueenOfCats: Please talk to your parents about seeing your primary care provider. That is not normal and not a "virgin hangover".
If a ride makes you ill you typically vomit and feel better after.
Revidgerator_: Bro calm down, I’m not dying or any... | 12 | 0.5 | |
1630338547 | 1630355873 | t3_pekris | t5_2to41 | 70 | [deleted]: [deleted by user]
[removed]
LuluXFire64: And you friend zoned him yikes adding salt into the wound.
jello-kittu: How dare she not agree to sex everyone! She can easily say he dick-zoned her, as in he was only interested in her as a potential date.
People have misunderstandings all the time. Hanging out wit... | 4 | 17.5 | |
1630336924 | 1630343268 | t3_pek8dc | t5_2to41 | 13 | [deleted]: TIFU I gave a young finance bro too much credit - he actually did not know his Hawaiian flowers
[removed]
clever-username3: Based on the title, it seemed like you lent a guy money to invest in flowers
flakination: I thought we had another tulip mania on our hands. Pikake mania
| 3 | 4.333333 | |
1630346290 | 1630348773 | t3_penehx | t5_2to41 | 39 | Joshie2112: TIFU by telling my parents that my friend catfished me.
This story actually happens over a few days, but here it is:
I was at my friends house (lets call him "Keed") the other day and we were playing some video games and soon enough I got a message on instagram from this girl. We were talking for a bit on ... | 3 | 13 | |
1630346448 | 1630347473 | t3_pengke | t5_2to41 | 88 | [deleted]: [deleted by user]
[removed]
Felix_the_Fossa: Oh man you're not an asshole at all. Just by drinking it you're being kind to them by not making a big deal out of it but this is easily solvable if you just tell them. "Hey guys I appreciate that you took the time to get me a drink so I can be included, but I don... | 5 | 17.6 | |
1630347050 | 1630361081 | t3_pennsr | t5_2to41 | 8 | [deleted]: TIFU by shoving potato in my ass and getting my brother to do the same
[removed]
TommmyThumb: Well that’s enough Reddit for today I think.
8BallPoolKing7577: Boy you said a mouth full!!! Lol
| 3 | 2.666667 | |
1630349485 | 1630534030 | t3_peohpr | t5_2to41 | 50 | this_is_for_dog_pics: TIFU by burning French toast, scaring everyone when my sister suddenly lost her appetite.
So, I very much enjoy a crispy piece of French toast. I don't mind if it gets a little *too* crispy. Burnt French toast? Edible to me.
Anyway, I decided to make breakfast today. For some background, my sist... | 8 | 6.25 | |
1630355236 | 1630359193 | t3_peqex2 | t5_2to41 | 61 | trash888888999999: TIFU by leaving my VR headset on the bathroom counter
Yesterday I had some alone time while the wife took the kids out to an activity. I decided to pull out the VR headset and enjoy a nice private round of choke the chicken. Well when the deed was done I apparently forgot to put the headset away an... | 3 | 20.333333 | |
1630355901 | 1630356923 | t3_peqmxb | t5_2to41 | 11 | david_cuzz: TIFU by think my job was being robbed
This happened a couple days ago not today. Also just read about the guy who thought his wife was a burglar which is why I decided to post this similar story.
​
My job is a basic job Mon-Friday 7am-3:30pm. Well this past Saturday I get a call from our securi... | 3 | 3.666667 | |
1630357412 | 1630361024 | t3_per5eo | t5_2to41 | 5 | Likeawetcheeto: TIFU I smoked a cigarette without an occasion
TIFU, it was the first day of school and for the past week or so my emotions have been on an all-time high.
When I'm happy I'm very happy.
When I'm mad, I feel so fucking pissed.
Everybody is amazing and everybody is fucking terrible.
And yesterday I al... | 3 | 1.666667 | |
1630361005 | 1630525680 | t3_pesb22 | t5_2to41 | 86 | PropellerGoblin: TIFU by taking a dump
On mobile, yada yada...
Friday night I go to my parents with my wife and our 8 week old daughter to show her off to our family and have a Chinese. I drink a few beers and enjoy the food and company. I love fried rice, and end up eating a lot of it.
Saturday morning, I get up ear... | 5 | 17.2 | |
1630363061 | 1630594324 | t3_pesnck | t5_2to41 | 24 | IAmTheTrueM3M3L0rD: You’re a fucking idiot , you can still catch covid after getting the vaccine , it’s just less likely to effect you.
As for the other diseases yes, you caught almost all of the ones you listed , you didn’t notice because the vaccines were effective enough for you not to feel a thing.
It’s why it’s ... | 4 | 6 | |
1630363163 | 1630365016 | t3_peszb3 | t5_2to41 | -1 | MxChungite: TIFU by killing my neighbors dog with a shovel
[removed]
mercuryrising320: Most people’s pets are like their kids, you’re lucky he didn’t come after you with that shovel…
ReflectB: He’s a tr*mp supporter he couldn’t even waddle over to keep his dog on a leash
mercuryrising320: Trump supporter or not, there ... | 5 | -0.2 | |
1630364653 | 1630365547 | t3_petfm1 | t5_2to41 | 25 | [deleted]: TIFU by flashing a stranger, who was behind me in line, a picture of my vag
[deleted]
MikeyMBCA: You'll be fine. He has no way of knowing it was your kitty that you flashed him...😁
Maybe he thinks someone sent it to you...
[deleted]: genuinely hope this was his first thought haha
AsphiXiate8888: He still g... | 5 | 5 | |
1630520194 | 1630549273 | t3_pfzorb | t5_2to41 | 20,114 | emphase: TIFU by stepping on a glass shard and fixing myself with a sex toy
I work in my underwear since the pandemic began. For lunch, I accidentally dropped a glass jar of alfredo sauce in my kitchen while cooking. My floor was covered with creamy sauce and shattered glass. I carefully cleaned my mess on my knees. Sa... | 10 | 2,011.4 | |
1630523725 | 1630572430 | t3_pg0v86 | t5_2to41 | 84 | BrownMambaOfficial: TIFU by "Proving It" to my dorm-mate
Obligatory this actually happened 5 years ago.
I (14M) was spending my freshman year abroad in a high school boarding program with roommates and everything. I initially thought this was going to be a blast with two other roomies from the same country as me. How... | 4 | 21 | |
1630526234 | 1630548529 | t3_pg1pt1 | t5_2to41 | 196 | [deleted]: [deleted by user]
[removed]
andrewta: Well now your butt hole is cleaned out.
So there is that.
DrDrank101: And a bit of weight loss never hurt anyone
andrewta: Exactly. Now you have less weight to carry up and down that hill.
Edit :why would op comment have gotten locked but not the post?
Andromeda0G: Aft... | 7 | 28 | |
1630524127 | 1630528375 | t3_pg1083 | t5_2to41 | 152 | britzmann: TIFU by answering a strangers phone
So, this was not actually today, it happened 6 years ago (I was 23 back then, so pretty young, and still kinda naive and gullible) and I just feel like this is worth sharing.
I was working for a very fancy, high level service, five star hotel, and we had a networking eve... | 3 | 50.666667 | |
1630529314 | 1630536059 | t3_pg2rb1 | t5_2to41 | 39 | bubblingalong: TIFU by eating before going on a hike with my research mentor
Sorry for formatting, on mobile.
This might be the most embarrassing thing that’s ever happened to me (less than an hour ago) and I need to be able to tell someone.
So I (21f) am beginning a research project this semester. My advisor happe... | 4 | 9.75 | |
1630529393 | 1630539413 | t3_pg2s9d | t5_2to41 | 36 | Background_Ad_9285: TIFU by hugging someone
Today I embarrassed myself by hugging someone too fast. I went over my girlfriends family house for a gathering with her, her younger sister and her mom. Her aunt and other family was already there when we arrived. And when we walked in the door she screamed ASIA!!!! (My nam... | 3 | 12 | |
1630532327 | 1630548459 | t3_pg3pzj | t5_2to41 | 42 | Mello1182: TIFU by being too honest during a job interview
So a couple months ago I had an intervew for a good job in a very important company (not relevant which one, but it is a car manufacturer and the position was a graduate one) and got the feedback only hours ago and only because I asked. The feedback was not ove... | 4 | 10.5 | |
1630533498 | 1630559075 | t3_pg434p | t5_2to41 | 3,291 | HurtMeWithYourPenis: TIFU by shooting maggots all over my kitchen
I found my favorite blender bottle behind my desk today and was disgusted to find that it wasn’t empty when I lost it, but instead was now home to a hundred or so maggots and left over protein. Being a cheapskate and confident in modern cleaning chemical... | 5 | 658.2 | |
1630533450 | 1630609891 | t3_pg42ka | t5_2to41 | 303 | letsmunch: TIFU by quoting Jeffrey Epstein in a job interview
This happened yesterday: I was on a Zoom call with a prospective employer for a communications job at a really prestigious company. It was the third interview I had done over the course of the past month.
The interview was already a little rocky. I got the... | 5 | 60.6 | |
1630539828 | 1631948069 | t3_pg60cm | t5_2to41 | 420 | GlitterCockWaffles: TIFU by using a buttplug
I (18f) live at home with my parents (41m & 38f). Today I was in the mood, and with my boyfriend in the middle of work, there was no other option but to grin and bare it or satisfy myself. I chose the latter.
Pulled up a video, grabbed a couple toys, and did my thing. O... | 17 | 24.705882 | |
1630539657 | 1630549517 | t3_pg5yjd | t5_2to41 | 22 | InfiniteCalendar1: TIFU by naively doing a photo shoot in front of a slave memorial
To start I know the title already sounds extremely f’d up but bare with me.
My fuck up happened last week during the first week of classes at my college. My school has been doing a lot of construction over the last few years, and they ... | 6 | 3.666667 | |
1630541466 | 1630645495 | t3_pg6gp2 | t5_2to41 | 1,253 | Similar_Perception_5: TIFU by wearing lingerie before going through TSA
This morning I decided I was going to wear a risque set of black lingerie with garter belt and thigh-high connectors to surprise my boyfriend. We were traveling and eager to get back home, so in my mind this was perfect. However, we had a flight th... | 7 | 179 |
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