start_date stringlengths 10 10 | end_date stringlengths 10 10 | thread_id stringlengths 8 10 ⌀ | subreddit stringclasses 1
value | subreddit_id stringclasses 1
value | total_score int64 -564 194k | text stringlengths 52 58.9k | num_messages int64 3 160 | avg_score float64 -55.17 14.3k |
|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|
1424441926 | 1424442782 | t3_2wjr74 | t5_2to41 | 10 | TheOneTrueAero: TIFU by borrowing earphones
TIFU by borrowing earphones when usually i do not do that. I'm always uncomfortable with that because i feel like i'm swapping ear wax with them. Today i did something different and that's why i screwed up.
I would like to first and foremost say that i am a person of good ... | 3 | 3.333333 | |
1424442271 | 1424443360 | t3_2wjrsj | t5_2to41 | 24 | amadcajuan: TIFU by forgetting to bring my apartment key with me!
As I'm writing this I'm now in a bus on my way towards my hometown as my mom asked me to go back this weekends. So as the title reads, today I fucked up for accidentally leaving my apartment key inside and locked myself outside my apartment.
I woke up ... | 3 | 8 | |
1424442498 | 1424463668 | t3_2wjs6o | t5_2to41 | 2,836 | TheSkott: TIFU by bathing a chinchilla in flour
So I'm babysitting my girlfriends chameleon and chinchilla because she isn't allowed to have pets in her apartment and her landlord is doing a walkthrough. I only have to keep them for two nights, but I've already messed up.
Yesterday evening I let her chinchilla out to... | 14 | 202.571429 | |
1424438105 | 1424447093 | t3_2wjl9q | t5_2to41 | 7 | kitterpup: TIFU by being the DJ at a friends party [NSFWish]
To start off, this happened around 8 years ago on Halloween 2007 when I was a 15 year old teenager. I was homeschooled since the seventh grade but i still kept in contact with my old buddies from grade school, one of which decided to host a house party for Ha... | 6 | 1.166667 | |
1424443721 | 1424459827 | t3_2wjud0 | t5_2to41 | 22 | insomniacchocoholic: TIFU by nearly losing my fingers.
So it is -35 degrees Celsius where I live today. I bundled up in my warmest clothes and walked to the bus stop because I'm a good girl and didn't want to miss any lectures, and also because I'm an idiot. I waited for a bus that didn't come. I took my gloves off to ... | 9 | 2.444444 | |
1424443979 | 1424445762 | t3_2wjuu4 | t5_2to41 | 8 | doingthisforgiftexch: TIFU by buying a homeless man dinner
So I bought a homeless man dinner once (about 2 nights ago) and he was very grateful. Which made me feel like he was truly down on his luck and maybe not a bad person so I let him continue sleeping at my place of employment. I work as a security officer for a... | 4 | 2 | |
1424443684 | 1424464729 | t3_2wjuau | t5_2to41 | 16 | tomboberson: TIFU wet socks on the bed [NSFWish]
happened lastnight i got the kids to bed, wife was at work what better thing to do than load up a little blankhub and polish thy scepter. Welp after 30 minutes im going to sleep, SO gets off work early in the morning comes home climbs in bed all i hear is "EWW WET SOCKS ... | 4 | 4 | |
1424445597 | 1424452737 | t3_2wjy03 | t5_2to41 | 43 | kiw14: TIFU by buying condoms at WalMart
This happened this morning:
My roommate and I are seniors in college, attending university in a particularly rural part of Pennsylvania. As you could very well imagine, the local WalMart attracts a unique cast of characters.
We drive to WalMart to buy our weekly necessities (g... | 3 | 14.333333 | |
1424447344 | 1424575519 | t3_2wk1h0 | t5_2to41 | 7 | nofreedom22: TIFU by having a dump at work
So I've actually never taken a dump on a toilet outside my house. Literally. I have this issue where if I take a crap and don't wash my ass with water then I feel extremely dirty, at home I've got one of those hoses near every toilet to wash myself after.
I was at the work to... | 3 | 2.333333 | |
1424445725 | 1424508786 | t3_2wjy9w | t5_2to41 | 143 | discounteggroll: TIFU: By using side entrance of a building I work at
This happened yesterday afternoon, so within 24 hours.
I work for a pretty large school district and we have multiple buildings for each school level. School is on break this week and being a network tech, I can blast through tickets (help requests... | 6 | 23.833333 | |
1424446859 | 1424502358 | t3_2wk0i2 | t5_2to41 | 421 | [deleted]: TIFU by bringing up a naked picture of my ex in a class presentation.
This morning I was presenting a PowerPoint for a debate class that I'm taking. My flash drive was not syncing with the school computer, but luckily I had emailed the presentation to myself the night before just in case anything went wrong.... | 12 | 35.083333 | |
1424445264 | 1424449256 | t3_2wjxcr | t5_2to41 | 10 | AlexanderWPeterson: TIFU by choosing a bad password and getting hacked in less than 24 hours.
Technically, this happened a few days ago. I had a story I wanted to share with TIFU (not this one) about how I got fired from work for charging my cell phone. For years, I have been reading Reddit, but never posted anything... | 3 | 3.333333 | |
1424447798 | 1424460507 | t3_2wk2ev | t5_2to41 | 100 | 2wheelsinheels: TIFU by taking a shower.
Little one is 4 weeks today. She blew out her diaper while I was in the shower. I decide to try to change her in the bathroom. Bad idea. No wipes. Poop flies everywhere. Take her down the stairs naked to get a new diaper. Pees allll down me and down the stairs. Then I get her cl... | 4 | 25 | |
1424449189 | 1424495786 | t3_2wk5fu | t5_2to41 | 5,037 | mahalo_merci: TIFU by snapping my co-worker's bra strap.
Whenever I hug my wife, I'll often put my hand on the clasp of her bra and give it a playful tug, just pull it out an inch or so, as if threatening to snap it back. She'll say something like, "Don't you dare!" or something equally playful. Sometimes if we're ho... | 12 | 419.75 | |
1424450633 | 1424457206 | t3_2wk8l7 | t5_2to41 | 123 | Truffle_Butt: TIFU by watching porn with headphones.
Let me first start off by saying that I never wear headphones, let alone while watching porn. And also I live in a house with my parents, grandparents, and little brother. I'm also from Asian decent, my parents being Chinese but me thinking that I've been Vietnamese ... | 9 | 13.666667 | |
1424448542 | 1424469621 | t3_2wk40f | t5_2to41 | 31 | enolprod: TIFU by trying to calm my cat down.
TIFU by trying to calm my cat down. This fuck up happened about 9 months ago when I was moving back from Nor-Cal but I figured Reddit loves cats and this IS a big fuck up. So anyways, I had three animals at the time, two dogs, and a black cat.(RIP Copper) Basically I had to... | 4 | 7.75 | |
1424451845 | 1424520732 | t3_2wkb98 | t5_2to41 | 447 | Euphedorical: TIFU by procrasturbating
This story didn't really happen today, but about three months back, it's still a hell of a fuck up though.
In September of 2014, I started at a tech college in a city near where I live, it's great as I love Computers and all that stuff. Another bonus to me is that there is near t... | 7 | 63.857143 | |
1424451682 | 1424461440 | t3_2wkavq | t5_2to41 | 19 | [deleted]: TIFU by saying my coworker was cheating.
I had a friend and coworker confide in me that years ago she had an affair. She still felt terrible about it and still hadn't worked through it. I told her it was probably good to talk about it and she could trust my discretion. Cut to later we're in the break ro... | 6 | 3.166667 | |
1424452382 | 1424453117 | t3_2wkcgo | t5_2to41 | 14 | _DisposeAfterUse: TIFU by not realizing I may be experiencing ED and trying to have sex with someone after drinking alcohol
TL;DR - The pickle stayed soft the whole damn time
For those of us who know, the title is pretty self-explanatory, but I'll elaborate.
So recently I decided I was open to casual sex and as such ... | 5 | 2.8 | |
1424452874 | 1424454401 | t3_2wkdkj | t5_2to41 | 3 | SweatyInBed: TIFU by making coffee
This happened about five minutes ago, and I just so happened to be on reddit.
I'm sick as a dog right now, and all I wanted was a cup of hot liquid. I have a Keurig in my room, so I decided to make some coffee. I got everything set and mashed "Brew". I'm so out of it that by the time... | 3 | 1 | |
1424451980 | 1424456011 | t3_2wkbjj | t5_2to41 | 16 | LaggyJoe: TIFU By making fun of a woman for reading 50 shades of grey.
This was back in may of 2014, i was flying back from a trip in Texas and going home to San Diego. The flight is getting ready to take off and everything is going well, there is a kid sitting to my right (i am in the aisle seat) I notice his Bleach L... | 3 | 5.333333 | |
1424453596 | 1424534979 | t3_2wkf1x | t5_2to41 | 35 | [deleted]: TIFU by getting Reddit blocked at my school
Like most TIFU posts, this happened a couple years ago, but I digress.
During my sophomore year of high school, there was a massive (10000+ comment) AskReddit post about exposing smaller subreddits. One of the highest upvoted comments was about the game-of-chance ... | 4 | 8.75 | |
1424449980 | 1424537377 | t3_2wk75l | t5_2to41 | 96 | Hate_my_Lifee: TIFU by almost getting my parents divorced
So a little background. My mother doesn't like her sister-in-law much (lets call her Marge). In my mother's defense, Marge is a wee bit arrogant and a whole lot selfish. Hence whenever my mother gets a chance she bitches about Marge to me and my brother.
So to ... | 4 | 24 | |
1424454938 | 1424457104 | t3_2wki1v | t5_2to41 | 2 | StickyTiger: TIFU by breaking my SO's heart
NotbeingBusted: Did you mean it as a joke?
StickyTiger: I don't know what I meant it as..a lapse in judgement
NotbeingBusted: Maybe you should send her flowers or something so that when she opens the door she actually gets to see something. Or, go there and apologize in per... | 4 | 0.5 | |
1424455957 | 1424457349 | t3_2wkkel | t5_2to41 | 21 | Pyrexhippie: TIFU by bringing my dog to wendys
TIFU by bringing my dog to Wendy's. He's a puppy st. Bernard and already very big.
I thought I'd go get some ice cream from Wendy's and bring my dog along with me.
Wrong idea.
Midway through the ride home, he freaked out from being in a car and projectile shit on the se... | 3 | 7 | |
1424440557 | 1424462969 | t3_2wjou0 | t5_2to41 | 4 | maxtheshocker: TIFU by calling a teacher a drunkard
Well im in senior year so i do reckless shit like any other. Keep in mind i go to an Austrian high school in Istanbul and our school is redundantly strict.
anyhow, we were in chemistry class and the teacher was talking about the effects of alcohol and he went on said... | 3 | 1.333333 | |
1424446818 | 1424504794 | t3_2wk0ev | t5_2to41 | 76 | Omelette-King: TIFU at the chiropractor
So I was at the chiropractor for my neck, and had been coming to this guy for about a month or two. When you arrive they take you into a room, and his wife (the assistant) comes in, attaches the electro-pads to loosen your muscles, applies the ice packs, and adjusts the table for... | 6 | 12.666667 | |
1424457477 | 1424492312 | t3_2wknrr | t5_2to41 | 60 | BLINDANDREFINED: TIFU by complimenting a girl on the bus
I had just moved to a new city, in a state I'd never lived in before. Now, because I didn't know anyone I was feeling pretty rambunctious and brave. On a particularly packed city bus ride, a girl was standing next to my seat, and I noted how beautiful she was. I ... | 4 | 15 | |
1424457898 | 1424526497 | t3_2wkopv | t5_2to41 | 17 | immaownyou: TIFU by forgetting that dreams aren't real
I've been having recurring dreams where I can fly. Like usual dreams seem very realistic, so when waking up I had no memory of dreaming I could fly so it just stuck in the back of my head that I could. I had no memory at all that it was a dream, and just felt like ... | 3 | 5.666667 | |
1424485855 | 1424511013 | t3_2wkrtx | t5_2to41 | 24 | FerociousOreos: Why is this downvoted?
JugsAndTugs: He should just upvote it if that's what he was going to say, I'm guessing that's why...
FerociousOreos: You tug jugs? Or do jugs tug you?
JugsAndTugs: Aha, I like a good set of jugs. I am also partial for a tug now and then.
FerociousOreos: So... Yes?
JugsAndTugs: [Do... | 7 | 3.428571 | |
1424460789 | 1424467598 | t3_2wkuyg | t5_2to41 | 12 | JackSylvane: TIFU By knowing my gf had sex with another girl and not getting aroused by it.
I will put some background for my history. My girlfriend is a very promiscous girl, she has had 11 sexual partners before me and she didnt even remember to how much guys she gave a bj or kissed. Im not like her, she is my first ... | 9 | 1.333333 | |
1424456114 | 1424463911 | t3_2wkkr2 | t5_2to41 | 6 | 3049278: TIFU by knowing guy who knows a guy that shut down a classroom
Earlier in the week there was an upperclassman in my high school who started smoking weed after school was out in the band room. Apparently the smell in the room was so bad they had to close down the room and lock the doors so all the band kids hav... | 3 | 2 | |
1424461284 | 1424490987 | t3_2wkvxk | t5_2to41 | 3 | -mArtiAn-: TIFU by getting the wrong wood.
Ok, full disclosure, this didn't happen today, but then didn't Einstein say that the difference between the past, the present and the future is an illusion, so.....tifu by oggling an artsy photo of a pair of breasts that my brother-in-law showed me, only to have my sister walk... | 4 | 0.75 | |
1424461895 | 1424561322 | t3_2wkx78 | t5_2to41 | 320 | kinkitup4u: TIFU by 'hacking' the network where I work
This happened literally 30 minutes ago. So the IT department where I work is made up of just a couple of people, who don't know as much about networking as I do.
A year or so ago I requested a wifi hotspot for the shop. We have no wires, but we have computers and ... | 6 | 53.333333 | |
1424454752 | 1424482458 | t3_2wkhmt | t5_2to41 | 6 | devil_d0c: TIFU by chewing on the wrong random item on my desk...
So I have a pretty bad habit of chewing on things while I work... Like pens, pencils, rubber bands, headphone cables (I dunno... maybe I was a cat in a past life?). Well not more than ten minutes ago I was doing some mind numbingly boring work at my des... | 4 | 1.5 | |
1424462666 | 1424567245 | t3_2wkys3 | t5_2to41 | 8 | KYR_SPUH33DY: TIFU by going to the dentist
This happened yesterday.
So I had a dentist appointment yesterday for the first time in almost 2 years. I am a healthy brushed and take good care of my teeth but I have one downfall, i love soda.
The FU: I went through and didn't have anything unusual happen. No pain or sen... | 4 | 2 | |
1424461833 | 1424562488 | t3_2wkx2v | t5_2to41 | 136 | lzndrsn: TIFU by submitting the wrong file on an online homework submission
Hi guys, I've been a long time reader of everyone's mishaps here and they are *so* funny (which kinda makes me a bad person for laughing at it but whatever) and get me through the day. I never thought I'd ever have to make an account to contrib... | 6 | 22.666667 | |
1424461253 | 1424465383 | t3_2wkvva | t5_2to41 | 11 | Amari-San: TIFU by looking right.
I usually look left first, and I usually just glance on the right so I don't back my car into the boat.
Well Reddit...TIFU because I looked right and turned the wheel too much and back over the bricks at the mailbox to my left.
FML. Worst damage by far.
http://i.imgur.com/V4e5mBx.j... | 3 | 3.666667 | |
1424464006 | 1424487296 | t3_2wl1hz | t5_2to41 | 4 | [deleted]: TIFU by having sex with a chick in Cuba
So this was about two years ago. Me and my brother decided to go to Cuba to drink up and relax in Cuba for a week. We end up having fun, getting smashed and the whole 9 that comes with going to an all-inclusive.
One night we went off resort to a club (don't quite reme... | 4 | 1 | |
1424465307 | 1424473998 | t3_2wl477 | t5_2to41 | 21 | KyleLewin: TIFU by spooning in front of a cute girl.
So this happened yesterday.
I was at some buffet with my dad and I went up to the stand where all the food was, it was a 3 course meal type of thing so there were trays at the side that you'd put a couple of plates on for the main, dessert, etc. I grab this green tr... | 3 | 7 | |
1424462624 | 1424471758 | t3_2wkyop | t5_2to41 | 12 | [deleted]: TIFU by printing a hentai picture (12 years ago)
Hello! This is the story all about how I started hating printers with every ounce of negativity in the world.
When I was 12, my friend introduced me to Newgrounds.com and how many cool games were on there. I would walk home from school, and get on the compute... | 3 | 4 | |
1424457013 | 1424493064 | t3_2wkms5 | t5_2to41 | 64 | spooncum: TIFU by having nocturnal emissions. NSFW
This happened this morning, so my GF is on the rag so we haven't had sex in a few days, and every guy knows if you don't get off regularly you have a higher chance of having wet dreams. Anyway, so its about 7am, I roll over and spoon my GF and grab her boob gently, the... | 7 | 9.142857 | |
1424465006 | 1424939245 | t3_2wl3l0 | t5_2to41 | 3 | [deleted]: TIFU by sending a lewd video of myself to my co-worker a little bit ago... while she is here with me.
I work at a REALLY slow, family pizza shop. My other co-worker couldn't make it in so I'm there for 11 hours. There's literally nothing to do after a few hours if there are no deliveries, which there weren... | 7 | 0.428571 | |
1424465553 | 1424467451 | t3_2wl4ne | t5_2to41 | 9 | NOCONTROL1678: TIFU by giving Louis CK five dollars.
I purchased Louis' new comedy special last week. Two days later I spent the last of the money in my checking account, save 42 cents. "OK, fine, I get paid in a few days. At least 42 cents is still in the black."
You see where this is going...
THEN the Paypal transfer... | 4 | 2.25 | |
1424466077 | 1424470258 | t3_2wl5r9 | t5_2to41 | 10 | musicicisair: TIFU by being honest.
I made an app for Android that lets you convert Google Play Credits into cash (PM me if you want the name).
Well, the bank I use froze my account and then contacted me to ask about a certain person I sent money too. Apparently this person is evil and on some naughty list.
So I told... | 9 | 1.111111 | |
1424466394 | 1424570686 | t3_2wl6fj | t5_2to41 | 4 | prankgonewrong1993: TIFU by playing a catfish prank on a colleague...
Actually happened yesterday but oh well...
**Background about the target, X:**
X is a 33 yr old Iranian guy who I met from the first day of University. I wouldn’t say he’s a friend but due to the fact that his English sucks and he cannot code to sav... | 8 | 0.5 | |
1424466033 | 1424714854 | t3_2wl5nr | t5_2to41 | 15 | KeithSwanson: TIFU by asking with what her fetishes are
Today I fucked up by finally asking my wife directly what fetishes are. Given the fact that she knows mine and has done for years, i wanted to know hers.
The anser was given with a petty attitude "I'm not telling YOU what my fetishes are"
Thank you for that and... | 4 | 3.75 | |
1424468399 | 1424527332 | t3_2wlake | t5_2to41 | 17 | shitgirl101: TIFU by shitting my pants in history
I was on some tablets with a certain side effect. I didn't expect this to occur during History class as it was listed as a rare side effect. So down to the "juicy" details. I was sitting in class and I feel a rumble in my stomach I pin it to my rather unhealthy breakfas... | 5 | 3.4 | |
1424468363 | 1424536617 | t3_2wlahr | t5_2to41 | 14 | tifunobuenodick: TIFU by not getting hard.
So I want to start by saying that I'm 17 and I thought the whole not being able to get hard thing was a myth or being too nervous was totally not in my vocabulary. I've had sex before with other people and at the thought of having sex I would immediately spring up. But this ti... | 4 | 3.5 | |
1424469871 | 1424704105 | t3_2wldq2 | t5_2to41 | 8 | okcumpits: TIFU by taking a girl I met on okcupid bowling
so after finally securing a date with someone online I managed to fuck it up immediately, but now looking back it was funny (after the humiliation settled).
so she asked to go to one of those fun centers, and I didn't care where we went so I said yes, and when ... | 4 | 2 | |
1424468969 | 1424502356 | t3_2wlbqf | t5_2to41 | 13 | Pretend_To_Reddit: TIFU By losing a fight to a car.
This happened when I was back in high school, I was getting driven back home by my older brother (him being a senior and I a junior) when we almost got T-boned by another car not stopping at a stop sign. Me and my brother are usually chill individuals, but I almost di... | 4 | 3.25 | |
1424470458 | 1424515346 | t3_2wlexj | t5_2to41 | 27 | RB_DA: TIFU by getting a used mattress
This happened recently:
I moved into a semi-furnished room where they gave me a bed-frame. They did not provide me with a mattress.
The day I was moving in, I saw my neighbour taking out his mattress and putting it on the curb. Considering I was extremely low on cash, I took th... | 5 | 5.4 | |
1424471603 | 1424492780 | t3_2wlhcp | t5_2to41 | 33 | Toxic_Axon: TIFU by farting so hard on the toilet that my asshole is bleeding
It was between poops, fast, strong, and very high pitched.
It must have matched the resonant frequency of my anus cause I rekt my shit.
Will continue sitting on the toilet until it stops bleeding.
_Decimation: > I rekt my shit
What was ... | 3 | 11 | |
1424471627 | 1424544765 | t3_2wlhee | t5_2to41 | 1 | Dr_Squirtle1: TIFU by using fat porn as a prank
So, this happened yesterday, I am sitting in my room minding my own business when my friend from down the hall comes and asks me to go with him and his roommate to get food. Well I decline because I wasn't hungry and just ate. At that moment it hit me "It would be so funn... | 4 | 0.25 | |
1424472720 | 1424473711 | t3_2wljoc | t5_2to41 | 8 | [deleted]: TIFU by thinking a customer was too drunk
This happened about half an hour ago and I'm writing this on my break.
I work as a barman and it was unusually quiet for Friday at this time when a woman comes down the stairs and orders two strawberry daquiris, sure no problem. Until the guy she was with came down ... | 3 | 2.666667 | |
1424473335 | 1424475731 | t3_2wlkx5 | t5_2to41 | 17 | dragonreal: TIFU by sending porn to my mom
So yesterday I was crusing through some of the greasier subreddits on my iphone and found a porn gif that really turned me on. Someone posted the source video and I copied the link and pasted it into safari. You can guess the rest.
Today, I'm texting my mom who I'm seeing tomo... | 5 | 3.4 | |
1424473286 | 1424481170 | t3_2wlkto | t5_2to41 | 13 | Imnotathreat: TIFU by taking my son into work
It was take your son to work day today. I had to lead an important meeting that day and I decided to let my son tag along. Promptly five minutes after the meeting started I heard a noise from behind me; ignoring it I continued. A few seconds later I realized it was my son s... | 6 | 2.166667 | |
1424473971 | 1424480934 | t3_2wlm85 | t5_2to41 | 6 | [deleted]: TIFU twice by shaving my nuts
I've been shaving my nuts for almost a year now and I decided it was time to shave my nuts sunday. While I was shaving in the shower I ran out of shaving foam, so there I was; a guy with his nuts halfly shaved. I finished showering, put my dress on and let it be for what it was.... | 3 | 2 | |
1424472795 | 1424725092 | t3_2wljtu | t5_2to41 | 13 | detscrotes: TIFU by getting a blowjob
So this happened yesterday at approximately 6pm. I went over to this girl's house(friends with benefits for about a year, neither of us want a relationship. It works for us.) She's giving me a blowjob, and I'm laying on the bed with my eyes closed, thinking to myself, "Man, life is... | 6 | 2.166667 | |
1424474673 | 1424565248 | t3_2wlnnt | t5_2to41 | 27 | myparentsnamedmethis: TIFU by trying to impress a girl at the grocery store
I turned right into the pasta aisle, in desperate need of spaghetti because that is one of the few meals I am capable of cooking. As I made the turn an attractive female caught my eye. Endless possibilities ran through my mind, but I quickly de... | 5 | 5.4 | |
1424474424 | 1424483052 | t3_2wln5e | t5_2to41 | 7 | [deleted]: TIFU by being a horney teenage boy
So to prepare for a date I had later on in the night I felt a great way to resist the urge of pushing for sex with my girlfriend until the end of the night was to get some of my horneyness out before by watching some porn, little did I know this was going to be a big mistak... | 4 | 1.75 | |
1424476578 | 1424713863 | t3_2wlrcp | t5_2to41 | 18 | Jishaxe: TIFU by telling a customer I loved them - twice
I was a night shift of my pizza delivery job and was taking an order of several boxes of cookie dough to a flat. 30-something lady opened the door and did the usual exchanging of pizza for cash. As I was sorting out the change I subconsciously told this poor woma... | 4 | 4.5 | |
1424475427 | 1424570871 | t3_2wlp4m | t5_2to41 | 726 | Bruggie: TIFU By order Applebee's 1300 miles away.
So my wife texted me to order supper us at Applebee's for her to bring home with her. I said sure what do you want. She replied and I was ready to call.
This is the first time I had ever called Applebee's so I didn't have the number in my phone. No big deal I though... | 14 | 51.857143 | |
1424476210 | 1424477193 | t3_2wlqns | t5_2to41 | 8 | [deleted]: TIFU by changing my lockscreen.
Fucked up earlier. Was at school when I decided to change my lockscreen so I scan through my photos looking for a nice one of my boyfriend. I find one of him topless, which in my mind is acceptable.
I'm doing work and I've left my phone unlocked as the teacher is coming roun... | 3 | 2.666667 | |
1424472192 | 1424478641 | t3_2wlikx | t5_2to41 | 13 | [deleted]: TIFU by having a cheap alarm clock
This fuck up happened everyday for about 6-7 years. For years I never had a good nights sleep and rarely had dreams. I was always waking up tired even when I had a good amount of sleep. At some point I must have began thinking it was normal and didn't give it much thought. ... | 3 | 4.333333 | |
1424477989 | 1424546707 | t3_2wlu2u | t5_2to41 | 1,142 | SassyPantsPanda: TIFU by calling my daughter "a racial slur".
Ok so, let me start by saying that this happened at a grocery store just about fifteen minutes ago. I'm still a little bit upset about it so if this turns out kind of ranty I'll fix it up afterwords.
So, I have a one year old daughter who is biracial (black... | 12 | 95.166667 | |
1424474222 | 1424482941 | t3_2wlmq6 | t5_2to41 | 7 | zbiskupiak: TIFU by chalking out "#420YOLOSWAG"
In chemistry today, we were writing our names out with chalk, using scales to measure how much chalk we used to write our name, and then using that data to calculate how many moles of chalk we used to write our name. Before we went to chalk our names out, the teacher clea... | 3 | 2.333333 | |
1424479465 | 1424559757 | t3_2wlwto | t5_2to41 | 65 | FishieGoRawr: TIFU By revealing a gift from her husband to a client
FML
I'm doing an internship at Staples, working with the IT guy fixing computer and doing stuff. Today, when I came back from lunch, there was an iPad air 2 waiting to be configured. They take about 30 minutes to do, so I saved my IT guy some time and... | 4 | 16.25 | |
1424479835 | 1424613631 | t3_2wlxg9 | t5_2to41 | 15 | [deleted]: TIFU by unintentionally stealing my Christmas present
Now, this happened around 6 years ago. I was at that age where I was a goody two shoes. Like if my mom told me to eat a dick I would eat a dick.
So anyways, it was almost Christmas time. My sister went out to buy some presents and I went to go draw shit... | 7 | 2.142857 | |
1424475563 | 1424494445 | t3_2wlpdy | t5_2to41 | 27 | FutureRobotWordplay: TIFU by trying to help a guy push a van out of the sludge. [NSFW language]
This actually happened about two hours ago and I am still hunkered down in my apartment waiting for the doorbell to ring.
So I live in New York and currently the sidewalks are chalky and the snowy slush is iced over. It is ... | 3 | 9 | |
1424480498 | 1424494305 | t3_2wlyp8 | t5_2to41 | 2 | teefour: TIFU by leaving my n-acetyl d-alanine to reflux overnight in glacial acetic acid using a heating mantle one size too small and no cut-off timer.
Technically, the part where I fucked up happened last night, but I'm dealing with it now. So I've got this gross looking mix of n-acetyl d-alanine with a bunch of oth... | 3 | 0.666667 | |
1424481352 | 1424482674 | t3_2wm0bw | t5_2to41 | 25 | jfkdlsfa: TIFU: I accidentally opened my binder against my teacher's cock in class. Hard. NSFW
This happened years ago but I've never shared it in my life and today I thought "Why not today?"
It was the winter of eighth grade and my uncoordinated thirteen year old self was always doing something clumsy.
This time it... | 5 | 5 | |
1424481440 | 1424482704 | t3_2wm0hf | t5_2to41 | 15 | jebulyna: TIFU when I got into a love triangle with my ex and new gf
TIFU ( I am aware that I walked into a death trap but because I am a horny 16 year old I didn't give a fuck). I started talking to a girl that my old girlfriend had sexual relations with. Now, my old girlfriend (let's call her Sam) is not by any means... | 3 | 5 | |
1424481940 | 1424540542 | t3_2wm1de | t5_2to41 | 12 | antonio1213: TIFU by my gf seeing porn on my phone
This is actually an exgf. This happened my last day of school my senior year. My gf at the time came over to see me before I headed off to school. We were all cuddly and having a good time. And her phone was ancient and she used mine for her instagram. So I gave her my... | 4 | 3 | |
1424481594 | 1424494294 | t3_2wm0rm | t5_2to41 | 7 | bleeping2: TIFU by not taking the bus
I work in a mall which is about a 20 minute walk from home. Normally I can take the bus but I figured since it was a nice day out that I would get some exercise in and rollerblade there.
Due to the fact that people drive like idiots I keep to the sidewalks. Sucks with the constan... | 4 | 1.75 | |
1424480857 | 1424537387 | t3_2wlzd7 | t5_2to41 | 10 | SheZowRaisedByWolves: TIFU by going to McDonalds
This happened when I was 10.
I was leaving the McDonald's ball pit to meet my parents at our car except, I went out the emergency exit. Alarms went off and I did the walk of shame in between the booths while people asked me "omg what did you do?". The manager came out a... | 4 | 2.5 | |
1424484023 | 1424719547 | t3_2wm50x | t5_2to41 | 11 | [deleted]: TIFU by slicing my nipple in the shower
This story is from a few months ago. I have a walk-in shower. Most of the time it is incredibly enjoyable for a nice hot shower. It is, however, very inconvenient to shave my legs in. I have figured out through much trial and error that I can prop my leg up on the side... | 6 | 1.833333 | |
1424484419 | 1424495494 | t3_2wm5pd | t5_2to41 | 6 | TIFUByWankingIt: TIFU By Wanking It
So today after reading about new ways to jack off I decided to try a new one out. I am sure some of you have heard about people fucking their couches while there is a ziplock bag filled with lube in between the cushions. So me being the young horny virgin that I am, decided to try it... | 3 | 2 | |
1424484673 | 1424486023 | t3_2wm668 | t5_2to41 | 34 | GetOutOfHereAlex: TIFU by logging into my ex's instagram account.
This happenned a month ago. Jan 27th.
My girlfriend of four and a half years left me in the end of November. I (thought I) fixed things, and we were back together 2 weeks and a half later. She left me again on January 21st telling me she couldn't have a... | 6 | 5.666667 | |
1424484756 | 1424507081 | t3_2wm6ad | t5_2to41 | 8 | MyEyes_qp: TIFU by not asking out a cute girl in my class.
We were separated from the rest of the class playing with venus fly traps, talking and laughing. All I had to say was, "Want to grab a drink sometime?"
Maybe my balls will drop before the next time I see her.
Patar103: Ask next time you see her, then report b... | 3 | 2.666667 | |
1424471071 | 1424554681 | t3_2wlg9h | t5_2to41 | 8 | luceth_: TIFU by washing my bike
I live in one of the communities surrounding Boston, and I've been feeling kind of smug the last month because I've been riding my bike through the snow instead of fighting traffic or relying on the unreliable subway. However, I'd been getting worried for a week or so about the road sa... | 4 | 2 | |
1424473888 | 1424489328 | t3_2wlm1p | t5_2to41 | 15 | [deleted]: TIFU By going for another run.
This was the shittiest day I have EVER had. Literally.
It all started out in the magically land we all know and love (or hate) known as high school. However, today was the only day of the week which I didn’t dread, a Wednesday. But what was so special about this Wednesday you ... | 3 | 5 | |
1424487720 | 1424489439 | t3_2wmbc0 | t5_2to41 | 18 | Aryziva: TIFU by writing "I'm a burnout" on an exam
Well. This is by far the dumbest thing I've done in a while. Here it goes:
So today I had a math test, and I really hate math. I suck at it and just decided to flunk this specific test because I didn't have the motivation to practice the material. (note: I'm not the ... | 4 | 4.5 | |
1424481240 | 1424490638 | t3_2wm043 | t5_2to41 | 6 | IFuckPigeons: TIFU by "celebrating Family Day" with my wife (:-P)
First off, I'd like to apoloize and state that this didn't happen today. It happened Sunday in honour of a holiday called "Family Day". And let's just say my wife and I wanted to really make it a true "family day". ;)
Anyway, my wife and I have known ea... | 3 | 2 | |
1424487748 | 1424488792 | t3_2wmbdm | t5_2to41 | 10 | kayserasarah: TIFU by taking a quick sponge-bath.
This actually happened today, yay! This morning, I went to take a shower before work, only to find that our pipes had frozen. We had some hot water, but no cold, so the hot water was scalding hot. I couldn't stand the heat because I have sensitive skin, so I have myself... | 3 | 3.333333 | |
1424487893 | 1424498626 | t3_2wmbnf | t5_2to41 | 6 | canibeyouwhenigrowup: TIFU by using the wrong French word
A few years ago I was taking a French Immersion class and the teacher told us to go for a walk and come back and tell him what we saw. While we were walking I saw this gigantic green bug, so I decided that would be my sentence. "J'ai vu une punaise verte."
I... | 4 | 1.5 | |
1424480000 | 1424491548 | t3_2wlxq7 | t5_2to41 | 12 | roxzr: TIFU by telling a coworker congratulations on being an uncle soon.
To make a long story shorter... I had just started a new job recently. As things go when starting a new job you meet fellow coworkers. During conversations with a new coworker, we will call this person X, I discovered that I had worked with X's s... | 3 | 4 | |
1424487366 | 1424510605 | t3_2wmaqq | t5_2to41 | -2 | FancyPanda97: TIFU by having arachnophobia
So this wasn't today, (sorry) but it was about a month back. I'm still dealing with some of the consequences of my FU.
So as you may have guessed from the title, I have arachnophobia. Semi normal fear to have. I'm a self proclaimed gamer guy, still going to college.
The F... | 3 | -0.666667 | |
1424489515 | 1424542397 | t3_2wme9g | t5_2to41 | 33 | throwawayjohnharris: TIFU by giving my booty call a dab (NSFW)
On a throwaway cuz marijuana is still illegal and thats fucking dumb, anyway its my first TIFU...this actually happened just now, and im still kinda fucked up.
So reddit I have this one friend lets call her Sarah. I met Sarah on Tinder. Sarah and I starte... | 7 | 4.714286 | |
1424490131 | 1424506789 | t3_2wmf7x | t5_2to41 | 39 | TastySaturday: TIFU by browsing Reddit with my mom [NSFW]
I was showing my mom the comments on the [AskReddit about objects yelling their names](http://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/2w7aa2/if_objects_yelled_its_name_when_you_used_it_which/) because I thought she'd find some of them funny (some were awkward). Then... | 5 | 7.8 | |
1424489760 | 1424492281 | t3_2wmenu | t5_2to41 | 9 | YouthoughtIwaserious: TIFU by drinking scolding hot coffee.
I'm not trying to write a fucking novel so this'll be short.
Like many other people I am a coffee addict, I like it black without milk.
I was visiting my sister who lives out of town when I suddenly had the need for a good ol cup o joe. I make myself a coff... | 3 | 3 | |
1424490788 | 1424491897 | t3_2wmgbg | t5_2to41 | 2 | [deleted]: TIFU By leaving a bag with cum tissues in the open
About a few days ago I cleaned out my room and put a whole bunch of useless junk in a trash bag to be thrown out by me. In the midst of cleaning my room I found about 5 stiff tissues with cum and 3 empty toilet paper rolls. So I threw them into the bag.
Fast... | 3 | 0.666667 | |
1424491953 | 1425372935 | t3_2wmi7k | t5_2to41 | 3,588 | CaptainAnalRam: TIFU by being on reddit in the shower.
So here I am, just got off work, drinking a beer, standing in this amazing hot shower and browsing reddit on my phone. My wife is asleep and refuses to wake up even though she promised to sex me up in the shower when I got home. She just walked in butt naked and sl... | 16 | 224.25 | |
1424491312 | 1424492253 | t3_2wmh51 | t5_2to41 | 6 | Lil_miss_Sunshines: TIFU by looking at my uncle's dick
So I submitted this on Tuesday but it got deleted, I assume, because of the word dick. Anyway, my old phone broke so while I got a new one my uncle gave me his old blackberry. I was extremely bored so I started looking at his old pictures and it was old cute pictur... | 3 | 2 | |
1424492571 | 1424566556 | t3_2wmj8y | t5_2to41 | 52 | Danieljsmith84: TIFU by French kissing my mom.
Ok, I didn't make my fuck up today. But on the day before my wedding in 2009. I am posting today, because as we passed the hotel where it happened today, while driving around, my wife had a wonderful laugh at my expense.
After our rehearsal dinner, where I drank a decen... | 5 | 10.4 | |
1424491647 | 1424682557 | t3_2wmhpk | t5_2to41 | 6 | Alfskill: TIFU by fucking up my whole future.
I have been applying for colleges, CSUs, UCs, privates and whatever. I have been waiting for my acceptences for my CSUs. Everyone was getting into CSUN --I mean... I suppose I got in too since I have good grades throughout my high school career along with my SAT.
Took me ... | 4 | 1.5 | |
1424492570 | 1424494645 | t3_2wmj8w | t5_2to41 | 12 | Subject38: TIFU by being in love with someone else as well as my girlfriend
So this happened a couple days ago but yeah, it still hurts. A little background first. I had been dating my girlfriend for a month until now. I told her from the start that I had not quite gotten over my previous girlfriend(for privacy's sake,... | 6 | 2 | |
1424493309 | 1424509589 | t3_2wmkch | t5_2to41 | 13 | [deleted]: tifu by stealing a girls drink
young couple. thought they left, so i snagged her drink,. they came back and nearby dude told me i owed her one.
I felt like such a heal, offered to pay and apologized.
fucking smokers, put a little sign up saying we'll be right back
Jackyates: Fucking grimy. Have fun gett... | 4 | 3.25 | |
1424492802 | 1424520244 | t3_2wmjll | t5_2to41 | 7 | dekoi_octopus: TIFU by confiding in my supervisor
Hey, this just happened tonight... I get points for that, right?
Well, tonight I came into the local coffee joint to see what was up. Alright, I went in there to see this cute girl that was scheduled to get off around the time I was going to show up. As she was getting... | 3 | 2.333333 | |
1424492835 | 1424524006 | t3_2wmjn4 | t5_2to41 | 212 | amcman: TIFU by seeing if my granddad was dead
My granddad is a hardworking man whose work ethic is something I can only dream of living up too. That being said he is really old, so old that its pretty much known in my family that he is going to die soon. Its something no one really talks about all that much. And I hav... | 4 | 53 |
Subsets and Splits
No community queries yet
The top public SQL queries from the community will appear here once available.