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You could tell him you really liked the way he chews with his back molars. | You're so fucking lucky your dad is the sheriff. |
You're so fucking lucky your dad is the sheriff. | You are 'sp fucking' wrong. |
You are 'sp fucking' wrong. | You get to be a little Chelsea Clinton. Everyone wants to meet you. Party with you. Have sex with you. |
You get to be a little Chelsea Clinton. Everyone wants to meet you. Party with you. Have sex with you. | But you can't do any of it. So it sucks. I always have to 'set an example'. |
He's just trying to mess with your head. Ignore him. | Does she fuck? |
Does she fuck? | I doubt it. Who'd want to fuck her. She probably reeks worse than the docks down in those panties. |
Oh nice save. | I was desperate. It was gross. |
I was desperate. It was gross. | Kenny'll come running back. This is just his way of pressuring you. |
Kenny'll come running back. This is just his way of pressuring you. | He says he loves me. |
He says he loves me. | Personally I think he has a deep, almost pathological desire to corrupt you. But I suppose that's a type of love. I certainly wish someone wanted to corrupt me. |
Personally I think he has a deep, almost pathological desire to corrupt you. But I suppose that's a type of love. I certainly wish someone wanted to corrupt me. | Maybe I should blister through a bottle of Tequila and just fuck his brains out. |
Maybe I should blister through a bottle of Tequila and just fuck his brains out. | No! |
No! | You're the one always saying 'Just do it'. |
You're the one always saying 'Just do it'. | That was before he pulled this 'Dick me or I dump you' shit. I say fuck his best friend. |
All our parents are weirdoes. I think my dad is into hookers. I know he lit cats on fire when he was a kid. | My dad acts like he's Johnny Fucking Perfect and he's really Johnny Fucking Rapist. |
My dad acts like he's Johnny Fucking Perfect and he's really Johnny Fucking Rapist. | I think this is a big part of growing up. It's losing your spiritual virginity. It's when you finally discover that your parents aren't anything they told you they were. They're even bigger hypocrites than your friends. |
I think this is a big part of growing up. It's losing your spiritual virginity. It's when you finally discover that your parents aren't anything they told you they were. They're even bigger hypocrites than your friends. | I can't believe I listened to one word of his shit. |
I can't believe I listened to one word of his shit. | But if he'd been sent to jail, there would be no Jody. |
But if he'd been sent to jail, there would be no Jody. | So I should feel happy that he got away with it? |
So I should feel happy that he got away with it? | I don't know. I kind of am. |
You break up with me because I won't fuck you. | That's not why we broke up. |
That's not why we broke up. | You flaunt some slut in my face. |
You flaunt some slut in my face. | Sharon's far from a slut. |
Sharon's far from a slut. | And when I finally agree to spread my legs, you accuse me of treating you like meat. |
And when I finally agree to spread my legs, you accuse me of treating you like meat. | Jody, you're only doing this to get back at your dad. It doesn't have that much to do with me. |
Jody. Wait. | What? |
What? | I'm scared. Three kids are dead. I want to go to this party. |
I'm scared. Three kids are dead. I want to go to this party. | Then go to the party. Run with the herd Kenny. Just don't spew out all that 'be an individual, assert yourself' crap anymore. |
What, do you work for my boss, dog? | Okay, okay. |
Okay, okay. | At least somebody likes this shit. |
At least somebody likes this shit. | INT. DARLENE'S STORE - NIGHT. |
Oh... | ...shit. |
...shit. | EXT. ROAD - DAY. |
Oh, shit. | EXT. ROAD - DAY. |
Unbe-fucking-lievable. | EXT. ICE CREAM TRUCK - DAY. |
It's a damn postal truck! | INT. POSTAL VAN - DAY. |
Let me put it in easy terms, Aristotle. We are carrying a damn bomb... | ...that is going to explode... |
...that is going to explode... | ...if we don't get out of this tunnel! |
...if we don't get out of this tunnel! | INT. GOMEZ'S HELICOPTER - DAY. |
What did I say? | Dude in uniform get in your face, you do not shoot your mouth off. |
Dude in uniform get in your face, you do not shoot your mouth off. | I need your truck. |
I need your truck. | No, no, no. You don't need my truck. You need somebody else's truck... |
No, no, no. You don't need my truck. You need somebody else's truck... | ...and a shitload of ice. |
...and a shitload of ice. | Look, if I don't get this stuff to McGruder, it's goodbye, Andy's Ice Cream, goodbye, Jerome, goodbye, Mon-... |
Look, if I don't get this stuff to McGruder, it's goodbye, Andy's Ice Cream, goodbye, Jerome, goodbye, Mon-... | ...-tana. |
...-tana. | Wait, wait. You don't believe the dead guy, do... |
Wait, wait. You don't believe the dead guy, do... | ...ya? |
...ya? | Yeah, I believe him. He was my friend. |
Yeah, I believe him. He was my friend. | For cryin' out loud. |
For cryin' out loud. | Hey, listen! Do you know what I think? I... |
Hey, listen! Do you know what I think? I... | ...think he was a wacko. And I think that G.I. ninja's a bigger wacko. And I think you're the biggest wack-... |
...think he was a wacko. And I think that G.I. ninja's a bigger wacko. And I think you're the biggest wack-... | ...-o of all, wantin' to be a part of this wacko shit! |
...-o of all, wantin' to be a part of this wacko shit! | I need your help. |
I need your help. | You are seriously mistaken if you think you are going anywhere in my... |
You are seriously mistaken if you think you are going anywhere in my... | ...truck. |
...truck. | Then you drive me to McGrud-... |
Then you drive me to McGrud-... | ...-er. |
...-er. | Look...I got two tons of the world's nastiest ice cream sittin' in a truck that should've been retired ten years ago. That shit will be worthless by noon. |
Look...I got two tons of the world's nastiest ice cream sittin' in a truck that should've been retired ten years ago. That shit will be worthless by noon. | And if that Elvis shit... |
And if that Elvis shit... | ...is as dangerous as you seem to think it is, I'm gettin' my ass as far away from you and it as possible. |
...is as dangerous as you seem to think it is, I'm gettin' my ass as far away from you and it as possible. | Peace. |
Peace. | All right. |
All right. | Wait, wait, wait. Hold up. Hold up. Look. |
Wait, wait, wait. Hold up. Hold up. Look. | You want cash? |
You want cash? | You want cash? |
You want cash? | I got, like, uh.... |
I got, like, uh.... | I got, uh.... |
I got, uh.... | I got fifty bucks. I'll get more. |
I got fifty bucks. I'll get more. | I'll rent the truck from you. You can stay here, you can go. Whatever you want. |
I'll rent the truck from you. You can stay here, you can go. Whatever you want. | No. |
No. | All right, then how about this? |
All right, then how about this? | Hey, you're gonna piss me-- What the hell are you supposed to be... |
Hey, you're gonna piss me-- What the hell are you supposed to be... | ...doing?! |
...doing?! | I need your truck! |
I need your truck! | You are not takin' my truck! |
...up. | Are you kiddin'? |
Are you kiddin'? | Come on! |
Come on! | Damn. |
Damn. | What the hell's goin' on? |
What the hell's goin' on? | It happens to this piece of shit... |
It happens to this piece of shit... | ...all the time. |
...all the time. | Damn diesel injections are flood-... |
Damn diesel injections are flood-... | Excuse me... |
Excuse me... | ...-ed. |
...-ed. | ...excuse me. Can you fix this? |
...excuse me. Can you fix this? | Do you wanna give me a minute? |
I'm about to get in your ass like last year's underwear, man. | That's... |
That's... | ...fine. |
...fine. | I ain't playin' that. |
I ain't playin' that. | Shut up. |
God-... | ...-damn! |
...-damn! | Okay, okay! |
Okay, okay! | Ah, one of them's in the back. |
Ah, one of them's in the back. | No, no, no, no, no. Keep goin'. |
No, no, no, no, no. Keep goin'. | Okay. |
Oh, shit. | Oh... |
Elvis is on ice again. | Okay. |
Okay. | Nice job back there. |
Nice job back there. | Don't gimme that "nice job" shit, man! They still got a vanload comin', and what do you got besides an empty... |
Don't gimme that "nice job" shit, man! They still got a vanload comin', and what do you got besides an empty... | ...gun?! |
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