conversations
listlengths 1
62
|
|---|
[
{
"content": "(to Ross) This is just Bactine. It won't hurt.",
"role": "user"
}
] |
[
{
"content": "Sorry, that was wax.",
"role": "assistant"
},
{
"content": "Oh, poor little Tooty is scared to death. We should find his owner.",
"role": "user"
},
{
"content": "Why don't we just put 'poor little Tooty' out in the hall?",
"role": "assistant"
},
{
"content": "During a blackout? He'd get trampled!",
"role": "user"
},
{
"content": "(nonchalantly) Yeah?",
"role": "assistant"
}
] |
[
{
"content": "You know, on second thought, gum would be perfection. (Jill gives him a stick of gum, and a strange look) 'Gum would be perfection'? 'Gum would be perfection.' Could have said 'gum would be nice,' or 'I'll have a stick,' but no, no, no, no. For me, gum is perfection. I loathe myself.",
"role": "user"
}
] |
[
{
"content": "(stops at a door) Oh no, the Mendels, they hate all living things, right?",
"role": "assistant"
},
{
"content": "Oh. (they knock at the next door, Mr. Heckles answers) Hi. We just found this cat and we're looking for the owner.",
"role": "user"
}
] |
[
{
"content": "(trying to hold back the struggling cat) He seems to hate you. Are you sure?",
"role": "assistant"
}
] |
[
{
"content": "Wait a minute. What's his name?",
"role": "user"
}
] |
[
{
"content": "Bob Buttons?",
"role": "assistant"
}
] |
[
{
"content": "(the cat runs away from her) Oooh! You are a very bad man!",
"role": "user"
}
] |
[
{
"content": "Here, kitty-kitty. Here kitty-kitty. Where did you go, little kitty-kitty-kitty? Here kitty-kitty-kitty-kitty...",
"role": "assistant"
}
] |
[
{
"content": "Wow. (she exhales in amazement, blowing the candle out)",
"role": "user"
}
] |
[
{
"content": "(rolling) Lucky sixes....",
"role": "assistant"
},
{
"content": "(entering with Paolo, arm in arm) Everybody, this is Paolo. Paolo, I want you to meet my friends. This is Monica.",
"role": "user"
},
{
"content": "(smitten) Hi!",
"role": "assistant"
},
{
"content": "And Joey....",
"role": "user"
},
{
"content": "Hi!",
"role": "assistant"
},
{
"content": "And Ross.",
"role": "user"
},
{
"content": "Hi!",
"role": "assistant"
}
] |
[
{
"content": "(proudly) He doesn't speak much English.",
"role": "user"
}
] |
[
{
"content": "Look at that!",
"role": "assistant"
},
{
"content": "(jealous) So, um... where did Paolo come from?",
"role": "user"
},
{
"content": "Oh... Italy, I think.",
"role": "assistant"
},
{
"content": "No, I mean tonight, in the building. Suddenly. Into our lives.",
"role": "user"
},
{
"content": "Well, the cat... the cat turned out to be Paolo's cat!",
"role": "assistant"
},
{
"content": "That, that is funny... (to Joey).... and Rachel keeps touching him.",
"role": "user"
}
] |
[
{
"content": "Alright. I looked all over the building and I couldn't find the kitty anywhere.",
"role": "assistant"
},
{
"content": "Oh, I found him. He was Paolo's cat.",
"role": "user"
},
{
"content": "Ah! Well! There you go! Last to know again! And I'm guessing... since nobody told me... this is Paolo.",
"role": "assistant"
},
{
"content": "Ah, Paolo, this is Phoebe.",
"role": "user"
}
] |
[
{
"content": "(smiling) You betcha!",
"role": "assistant"
}
] |
[
{
"content": "(chewing gum) Ah, let's see. What next? Blow a bubble. A bubble's good. It's got a... boyish charm, it's impish. Here we go.",
"role": "user"
}
] |
[
{
"content": "Nice going, imp. OK, it's OK. All I need to do is reach over and put it in my mouth. (Chandler slyly grabs the gum from the wall and slides it back in his mouth.)",
"role": "assistant"
},
{
"content": "Good save! We're back on track, and I'm... (grimacing) ..chewing someone else's gum. This is not my gum. Oh my God! Oh my God! And now you're choking.",
"role": "user"
}
] |
[
{
"content": "(gasping) Yes... thank you. That was... that was....",
"role": "assistant"
}
] |
[
{
"content": "(mocking Paolo) Blah blah blah, blah blah blah... blah blaaaaaah....",
"role": "user"
}
] |
[
{
"content": "Wha-What did he say that was so funny?",
"role": "assistant"
},
{
"content": "I have absolutely no idea.",
"role": "user"
},
{
"content": "That's... that's classic.",
"role": "assistant"
},
{
"content": "(to Monica and Phoebe) Oh my God, you guys, what am I doing? What am I doing? This is so un-me!",
"role": "user"
},
{
"content": "If you want, I'll do it.",
"role": "assistant"
}
] |
[
{
"content": "I know, I just want to bite his bottom lip. (Rachel looks at her) But I won't.",
"role": "user"
},
{
"content": "God, the first time he smiled at me... those three seconds were more exciting than three weeks in Bermuda with Barry.",
"role": "assistant"
},
{
"content": "You know, did you ride mopeds? 'Cause I've heard... (they stare at her)... oh, I see... it's not about that right now. OK.",
"role": "user"
},
{
"content": "Y'know, I know it's totally superficial and we have absolutely nothing in common, and we don't even speak the same language but Goooooooddddddd....",
"role": "assistant"
}
] |
[
{
"content": "Paolo. Hi.",
"role": "user"
}
] |
[
{
"content": "Listen. Um, listen. Something you should... know... um, Rachel and I... we're kind of a thing.",
"role": "assistant"
}
] |
[
{
"content": "Thing, yes. Thing.",
"role": "user"
}
] |
[
{
"content": "No, no, no. Technically the... sex is not... being had, but that's... see, that's not the point. See, um, the point is that... Rachel and I should be, er, together. You know, and if you get in the.... um...",
"role": "assistant"
}
] |
[
{
"content": "No, no, that's not where I was going. Er, if you get in the... way, of us becoming a thing, then I would be, well, very sad.",
"role": "user"
}
] |
[
{
"content": "Yeah! Se vice?",
"role": "assistant"
}
] |
[
{
"content": "So you do know a little English.",
"role": "user"
}
] |
[
{
"content": "Do you know the word crapweasel?",
"role": "assistant"
}
] |
[
{
"content": "That's funny, because you know, you are a huge crapweasel!",
"role": "user"
}
] |
[
{
"content": "OK.",
"role": "assistant"
}
] |
[
{
"content": "Oh, look look look. The last candle's about to burn out. 10, 9, 8, 7... (time lapse)... negative 46, negative 47, negative 48.... (someone blows it out, the room gets completely dark)",
"role": "user"
},
{
"content": "Thank you.",
"role": "assistant"
},
{
"content": "Thanks.",
"role": "user"
},
{
"content": "Kinda... spooky without any lights.",
"role": "assistant"
},
{
"content": "(does a maniacal laugh) Bwah-hah-hah!",
"role": "user"
}
] |
[
{
"content": "OK, guys, guys? I have the definitive one. Mwwwooooo-hah-hah...",
"role": "assistant"
}
] |
[
{
"content": "Oh.. oh... oh.",
"role": "user"
},
{
"content": "Hey Ross. This probably isn't the best time to bring it up, but you have to throw a party for Monica.",
"role": "assistant"
}
] |
[
{
"content": "Yes. Yes, thanks for letting me use your phone... and for saving my life.",
"role": "user"
}
] |
[
{
"content": "Hi, um, I'm account number 7143457. And, uh, I don't know if you got any of that, but I would really like a copy of the tape.",
"role": "assistant"
}
] |
[
{
"content": "Dehydrated Japanese noodles under fluorescent lights... does it get better than this?",
"role": "user"
}
] |
[
{
"content": "Ah, y'see, perfect might be a problem. Had you said 'co-dependent', or 'self-destructive'...",
"role": "assistant"
}
] |
[
{
"content": "Yes please.",
"role": "user"
}
] |
[
{
"content": "He's a he?",
"role": "assistant"
}
] |
[
{
"content": "...Couldn't enjoy a cup of noodles after that. I mean, is that ridiculous? Can you believe she actually thought that?",
"role": "user"
},
{
"content": "Um... yeah. Well, I mean, when I first met you, y'know, I thought maybe, possibly, you might be...",
"role": "assistant"
},
{
"content": "You did?",
"role": "user"
},
{
"content": "Yeah, but then you spent Phoebe's entire birthday party talking to my breasts, so then I figured maybe not.",
"role": "assistant"
},
{
"content": "Huh. Did, uh... any of the rest of you guys think that when you first met me?",
"role": "user"
},
{
"content": "I did.",
"role": "assistant"
},
{
"content": "Yeah, I think so, yeah.",
"role": "user"
},
{
"content": "Not me.",
"role": "assistant"
},
{
"content": "Nono, me neither. Although, uh, y'know, back in college, Susan Sallidor did.",
"role": "user"
},
{
"content": "You're kidding! Did you tell her I wasn't?",
"role": "assistant"
},
{
"content": "No. No, it's just 'cause, uh, I kinda wanted to go out with her too, so I told her, actually, you were seeing Bernie Spellman... who also liked her, so...",
"role": "user"
}
] |
[
{
"content": "Well, this is fascinating. So, uh, what is it about me?",
"role": "assistant"
},
{
"content": "I dunno, 'cause you're smart, you're funny...",
"role": "user"
},
{
"content": "Ross is smart and funny, d'you ever think that about him?",
"role": "assistant"
}
] |
[
{
"content": "WHAT IS IT?!",
"role": "user"
},
{
"content": "Okay, I-I d'know, you-you just- you have a quality.",
"role": "assistant"
}
] |
[
{
"content": "Oh, oh, a quality, good, because I was worried you guys were gonna be vague about this.",
"role": "user"
}
] |
[
{
"content": "Hello? Hello? Oh! Rachel, it's Paolo calling from Rome.",
"role": "assistant"
},
{
"content": "Oh my God! Calling from Rome! (Takes phone) Bon giorno, caro mio.",
"role": "user"
},
{
"content": "(to Joey) So he's calling from Rome. I could do that. Just gotta go to Rome.",
"role": "assistant"
},
{
"content": "Monica, your dad just beeped in, but can you make it quick? Talking to Rome. (Showing off to Phoebe and Chandler) I'm talking to Rome.",
"role": "user"
},
{
"content": "Hey dad, what's up? (Listens) Oh God. Ross, it's Nana.",
"role": "assistant"
}
] |
[
{
"content": "So, uh, how's she doing?",
"role": "user"
}
] |
[
{
"content": "How-how are you, Mom?",
"role": "assistant"
}
] |
[
{
"content": "What?",
"role": "user"
}
] |
[
{
"content": "Nothing.",
"role": "assistant"
}
] |
[
{
"content": "She is unbelievable, our mother is...",
"role": "user"
},
{
"content": "Okay, relax, relax. We are gonna be here for a while, it looks like, and we still have boyfriends and your career to cover.",
"role": "assistant"
},
{
"content": "Oh God!",
"role": "user"
}
] |
[
{
"content": "The fuzzy little mints at the bottom of her purse.",
"role": "assistant"
},
{
"content": "Oh! ...Yeah, they were gross. Oh, you know what I loved? Her Sweet 'n' Los. How she was always stealing them from- from restaurants.",
"role": "user"
}
] |
[
{
"content": "She looks so small.",
"role": "assistant"
},
{
"content": "I know.",
"role": "user"
},
{
"content": "Well, at least she's with Pop-Pop and Aunt Phyllis now.",
"role": "assistant"
},
{
"content": "G'bye, Nana. (She kisses her on the forehead.)",
"role": "user"
},
{
"content": "Bye, Nana.",
"role": "assistant"
}
] |
[
{
"content": "Ross!",
"role": "user"
}
] |
[
{
"content": "Y'know how-how the nurse said that-that Nana had passed? Well, she's not, quite..",
"role": "assistant"
}
] |
[
{
"content": "She's not- past, she's present, she's back.",
"role": "user"
}
] |
[
{
"content": "I, uh, I'll go see. (He goes in)",
"role": "assistant"
}
] |
[
{
"content": "Now she's passed.",
"role": "user"
}
] |
[
{
"content": "I just have to know, okay. Is it my hair?",
"role": "assistant"
},
{
"content": "(exasperated) Yes, Chandler, that's exactly what it is. It's your hair.",
"role": "user"
},
{
"content": "Yeah, you have homosexual hair.",
"role": "assistant"
}
] |
[
{
"content": "So, um, did she...",
"role": "user"
},
{
"content": "Twice.",
"role": "assistant"
},
{
"content": "Twice?",
"role": "user"
},
{
"content": "Oh, that sucks!",
"role": "assistant"
},
{
"content": "You guys okay?",
"role": "user"
},
{
"content": "I dunno, it's weird. I mean, I know she's gone, but I just don't feel, uh...",
"role": "assistant"
},
{
"content": "Maybe that's 'cause she's not really gone.",
"role": "user"
},
{
"content": "Nono, she's gone.",
"role": "assistant"
},
{
"content": "We checked. A lot.",
"role": "user"
},
{
"content": "Hm, I mean maybe no-one ever really goes. Ever since my mom died, every now and then, I get the feeling that she's like right here, y'know? (She circles her hand around her right shoulder. Chandler, sitting on her right, draws back nervously) Oh! And Debbie, my best friend from junior high- got struck by lightning on a miniature golf course- I always get this really strong Debbie vibe whenever I use one of those little yellow pencils, y'know? ...I miss her.",
"role": "assistant"
},
{
"content": "Aw. Hey, Pheebs, want this? (Gives her a pencil)",
"role": "user"
},
{
"content": "Thanks!",
"role": "assistant"
},
{
"content": "Sure. I just sharpened her this morning.",
"role": "user"
},
{
"content": "Now, see, I don't believe any of that. I think once you're dead, you're dead! You're gone! You're worm food! (realises his tactlessness) ...So Chandler looks gay, huh?",
"role": "assistant"
},
{
"content": "Y'know, I dunno who this is, but it's not Debbie. (Hands back the pencil)",
"role": "user"
}
] |
[
{
"content": "I thought it was gonna be a closed casket.",
"role": "assistant"
}
] |
[
{
"content": "(sarcastic) I don't see why not.",
"role": "user"
}
] |
[
{
"content": "Here's my retainer!",
"role": "assistant"
}
] |
[
{
"content": "Dad!",
"role": "user"
}
] |
[
{
"content": "You what?",
"role": "assistant"
}
] |
[
{
"content": "Define fun.",
"role": "user"
}
] |
[
{
"content": "...And then we throw your body in the water... Gee, that does sound fun.",
"role": "assistant"
}
] |
[
{
"content": "That's probably what they'll say.",
"role": "user"
}
] |
[
{
"content": "Hey, gorgeous.",
"role": "assistant"
}
] |
[
{
"content": "No, nono, don't- don't worry about it. Believe me, apparently other people have made the same mistake.",
"role": "user"
}
] |
[
{
"content": "So, uh... what do you think it is about me?",
"role": "assistant"
}
] |
[
{
"content": "...Quality, right, great.",
"role": "user"
}
] |
[
{
"content": "Lowell? Financial Services' Lowell, that's who you saw me with?",
"role": "assistant"
}
] |
[
{
"content": "Well, yeah... 's'no Brian in Payroll.",
"role": "user"
}
] |
[
{
"content": "No! Uh, I d'know! The point is, if you were gonna set me up with someone, I'd like to think you'd set me up with someone like him.",
"role": "assistant"
}
] |
[
{
"content": "Excuse me? You don't think I could get a Brian? Because I could get a Brian. Believe you me. ...I'm really not.",
"role": "user"
}
] |
[
{
"content": "(holding a dress out from inside the closet) This one?",
"role": "assistant"
}
] |
[
{
"content": "I have shown you everything we have. Unless you want your mother to spend eternity in a lemon yellow pant-suit, go with the burgundy.",
"role": "user"
}
] |
[
{
"content": "Oh! A fine choice. I'm coming out. (Starts to climb over the furniture)",
"role": "assistant"
}
] |
[
{
"content": "Okay. Um, how about these? (Holds out a pair)",
"role": "user"
}
] |
[
{
"content": "And where she's going everyone else'll be dressier?",
"role": "assistant"
}
] |
[
{
"content": "(forages around) Okay, I have nothing in an evening shoe in the burgundy. I can show you something in a silver that may work.",
"role": "user"
}
] |
[
{
"content": "No! Nonono, wait a sec. I may have something in the back.",
"role": "assistant"
}
] |
[
{
"content": "Oh my God..",
"role": "user"
}
] |
[
{
"content": "Yeah, just... just Nana stuff.",
"role": "assistant"
}
] |
[
{
"content": "(entering) How we doing, you guys ready?",
"role": "user"
},
{
"content": "Mom already called this morning to remind me not to wear my hair up. Did you know my ears are not my best feature?",
"role": "assistant"
},
{
"content": "Some days it's all I can think about.",
"role": "user"
},
{
"content": "(entering) Hi, sorry I'm late, I couldn't find my bearings.",
"role": "assistant"
},
{
"content": "Oh, you-you mean your earrings?",
"role": "user"
},
{
"content": "What'd I say?",
"role": "assistant"
},
{
"content": "(sticking her foot out) Hm-m.",
"role": "user"
},
{
"content": "Are these the shoes?",
"role": "assistant"
},
{
"content": "Yes. Paolo sent them from Italy.",
"role": "user"
},
{
"content": "What, we-uh- we don't have shoes here, or...?",
"role": "assistant"
},
{
"content": "(entering with Chandler) Morning. We ready to go?",
"role": "user"
},
{
"content": "Well, don't we look nice all dressed up?...It's stuff like that, isn't it?",
"role": "assistant"
}
] |
[
{
"content": "It was a really beautiful service.",
"role": "user"
}
] |
[
{
"content": "What?",
"role": "assistant"
},
{
"content": "Nothing, just your overcoat sounds remarkably like Brent Mussberger.",
"role": "user"
},
{
"content": "Check it out, Giants-Cowboys. (He has a pocket TV)",
"role": "assistant"
},
{
"content": "You're watching a football game at a funeral?",
"role": "user"
},
{
"content": "No, it's the pre-game. I'm gonna watch it at the reception.",
"role": "assistant"
},
{
"content": "You are a frightening, frightening man.",
"role": "user"
}
] |
[
{
"content": "Oh no! My new Paolo shoes!",
"role": "assistant"
},
{
"content": "Oh, I hope they're not ruined.",
"role": "user"
},
{
"content": "God, what a great day. ...What? Weather-wise!",
"role": "assistant"
},
{
"content": "I know, uh, the air, the-the trees... even though Nana's gone there's, there's something almost, uh- I dunno, almost life-aff- (Not looking where he is going he falls into an open grave)",
"role": "user"
}
] |
[
{
"content": "I'm fine. Just-just... having my worst fear realised...",
"role": "assistant"
}
] |
[
{
"content": "Okay, don't worry, I'm just checking to see if the muscle's in spasm...huh.",
"role": "user"
},
{
"content": "What, what is it?",
"role": "assistant"
},
{
"content": "You missed a belt loop.",
"role": "user"
},
{
"content": "Oh! No-n-",
"role": "assistant"
},
{
"content": "Okay, it's in spasm.",
"role": "user"
}
] |
[
{
"content": "Oh, no-",
"role": "assistant"
}
] |
[
{
"content": "Hi, I'm Chandler, and I have no idea who Dorothy is.",
"role": "user"
}
] |
[
{
"content": "Hey, look who's up! How do you feel?",
"role": "assistant"
},
{
"content": "I feel great. I feel- great, I fleel great.",
"role": "user"
},
{
"content": "Wow, those pills really worked, huh?",
"role": "assistant"
},
{
"content": "Not the first two, but the second two- woooo! ...I love you guys. You guys are the greatest. I love my sister (Kisses Monica), I love Pheebs... (Hugs her)",
"role": "user"
},
{
"content": "Ooh! That's so nice...",
"role": "assistant"
},
{
"content": "...Chandler!",
"role": "user"
},
{
"content": "Hey.",
"role": "assistant"
},
{
"content": "(hugs him) And listen, man, if you wanna be gay, be gay. Doesn't matter to me.",
"role": "user"
}
] |
[
{
"content": "Rachel. Rachel Rachel. (Sits down beside her) I love you the most.",
"role": "assistant"
},
{
"content": "(humouring him) Oh, well you know who I love the most?",
"role": "user"
},
{
"content": "No.",
"role": "assistant"
},
{
"content": "You!",
"role": "user"
},
{
"content": "Oh.. you don't get it! (Passes out and slumps across her)",
"role": "assistant"
}
] |
[
{
"content": "(hides the TV, but he still has an earphone) Just a, uh... hearing disability.",
"role": "user"
}
] |
[
{
"content": "Seventeen-fourteen Giants... three minutes to go in the third.",
"role": "assistant"
}
] |
[
{
"content": "(still trapped under Ross) Pheebs, could you maybe hand me a cracker?",
"role": "user"
}
] |
[
{
"content": "Well, sure, what with it being her funeral and all.",
"role": "assistant"
}
] |
[
{
"content": "That sounds like Nana.",
"role": "user"
}
] |
[
{
"content": "...I can imagine.",
"role": "assistant"
}
] |
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