conversations
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[
{
"content": "That is a wonder. So tell me something, Mom. If you had to do it all over again, I mean, if she was here right now, would you tell her?",
"role": "user"
}
] |
[
{
"content": "How she drove you crazy, picking on every little detail, like your hair... for example.",
"role": "assistant"
}
] |
[
{
"content": "Do you think things would have been better if you'd just told her the truth?",
"role": "user"
}
] |
[
{
"content": "Huh.",
"role": "assistant"
}
] |
[
{
"content": "Oh, I think so.",
"role": "user"
}
] |
[
{
"content": "Thank you. They're yours.",
"role": "assistant"
}
] |
[
{
"content": "Hey, who's this little naked guy?",
"role": "user"
},
{
"content": "That little naked guy would be me.",
"role": "assistant"
},
{
"content": "Aww, look at the little thing.",
"role": "user"
},
{
"content": "Yes, yes, fine, that is my penis. Can we be grown-ups now?",
"role": "assistant"
},
{
"content": "Who are those people?",
"role": "user"
},
{
"content": "Got me.",
"role": "assistant"
},
{
"content": "Oh, that's Nana, right there in the middle. (Reads the back) 'Me and the gang at Java Joe's'.",
"role": "user"
},
{
"content": "Wow, Monica, you look just like your grandmother. How old was she there?",
"role": "assistant"
},
{
"content": "Let's see, 1939... yeah, 24, 25?",
"role": "user"
},
{
"content": "Looks like a fun gang. (They all look at each other and smile)",
"role": "assistant"
},
{
"content": "Ooh, look-look-look-look-look! I got Monica naked!",
"role": "user"
},
{
"content": "(looking) Nono, that would be me again. I'm, uh, just trying something.",
"role": "assistant"
}
] |
[
{
"content": "Hey, Lowell.",
"role": "user"
}
] |
[
{
"content": "So how's it going there in Financial Services?",
"role": "assistant"
}
] |
[
{
"content": "Good, good. Listen, heh, I dunno what Shelley told you about me, but, uh... I'm not.",
"role": "user"
}
] |
[
{
"content": "Really.",
"role": "assistant"
}
] |
[
{
"content": "So- you can tell?",
"role": "user"
}
] |
[
{
"content": "So you don't think I have a, a quality?",
"role": "assistant"
}
] |
[
{
"content": "He is?",
"role": "user"
}
] |
[
{
"content": "Out of my league. I could get a Brian. (Brian enters behind him) If I wanted to get a Brian, I could get a Brian. (Sees him) Hey, Brian.",
"role": "assistant"
}
] |
[
{
"content": "Terry, I, I, I know that I haven't worked here very long, but I was wondering, do you think it would be possible if I got a $100 advance in my salary?",
"role": "user"
}
] |
[
{
"content": "It's so that I can spend Thanksgiving with my family. See, every year we go skiing in Vail, and normally my father pays for my ticket, but I sort of started the whole independence thing, you know, which is actually why I took this job.",
"role": "assistant"
}
] |
[
{
"content": "Ok, I, I hear what you're sayin'. I'm with you. Um, but I, but I'm trying really hard. And I think I'm doing better. I really do. Does anybody need coffee? (everyone in the place raises their hand) Oh, look at that.",
"role": "user"
}
] |
[
{
"content": "Excuse me, sir. Hi, you come in here all time. I was just wondering, do you think there's a possibility that you could give me an advance on my tips?",
"role": "assistant"
}
] |
[
{
"content": "Ok, ok, that's fine. Fine. Hey, I'm sorry about that spill before. (picks up the tip he leaves) Only $98.50 to go.",
"role": "user"
}
] |
[
{
"content": "Hey. Ross, did you know Mom and Dad are going to Puerto Rico for Thanksgiving?",
"role": "assistant"
},
{
"content": "No, they're not.",
"role": "user"
},
{
"content": "Yes, they are. The Blymens invited them.",
"role": "assistant"
},
{
"content": "You're wrong.",
"role": "user"
},
{
"content": "I am not wrong.",
"role": "assistant"
},
{
"content": "You're wrong.",
"role": "user"
},
{
"content": "No, I just talked to them.",
"role": "assistant"
},
{
"content": "(getting up, upset) I'm calling Mom.",
"role": "user"
}
] |
[
{
"content": "Hey, hey.",
"role": "assistant"
},
{
"content": "Hey.",
"role": "user"
},
{
"content": "Hey.",
"role": "assistant"
},
{
"content": "And this from the cry-for-help department. Are you wearing makeup?",
"role": "user"
},
{
"content": "Yes, I am. As of today, I am officially Joey Tribbiani, actor slash model.",
"role": "assistant"
},
{
"content": "That's so funny, 'cause I was thinking you look more like Joey Tribbiani, man slash woman.",
"role": "user"
},
{
"content": "What were you modeling for?",
"role": "assistant"
},
{
"content": "You know those posters for the city free clinic?",
"role": "user"
},
{
"content": "Oh, wow, so you're gonna be one of those \"healthy, healthy, healthy guys\"?",
"role": "assistant"
},
{
"content": "You know, the asthma guy was really cute.",
"role": "user"
},
{
"content": "Do you know which one you're gonna be?",
"role": "assistant"
},
{
"content": "No, but I hear lyme disease is open, so... (crosses fingers)",
"role": "user"
},
{
"content": "Good luck, man. I hope you get it.",
"role": "assistant"
},
{
"content": "Thanks.",
"role": "user"
}
] |
[
{
"content": "(to Monica) Well, you were right. How can they do this to us, huh? It's Thanksgiving.",
"role": "assistant"
},
{
"content": "Ok, I'll tell you what. How about I cook dinner at my place? I'll make it just like Mom's.",
"role": "user"
},
{
"content": "Will you make the mashed potatoes with the lumps?",
"role": "assistant"
},
{
"content": "You know, they're not actually supposed to have... (Ross looks at her sheepishly) I'll work on the lumps. Joey, you're going home, right?",
"role": "user"
},
{
"content": "Yeah.",
"role": "assistant"
},
{
"content": "And I assume, Chandler, you are still boycotting all the pilgrim holidays.",
"role": "user"
},
{
"content": "Yes, every single one of them.",
"role": "assistant"
},
{
"content": "Phoebe, you're gonna be with your grandma?",
"role": "user"
},
{
"content": "Yes, and her boyfriend. But we're celebrating Thanksgiving in December 'cause he is lunar.",
"role": "assistant"
},
{
"content": "So you're free Thursday, then.",
"role": "user"
},
{
"content": "Yeah. Oh, can I come?",
"role": "assistant"
},
{
"content": "Yeah. Rach, are you thinking you're gonna make it to Vail?",
"role": "user"
},
{
"content": "Absolutely. Shoop, shoop, shoop. Only a hundred and two dollars to go.",
"role": "assistant"
},
{
"content": "I thought it was $98.50.",
"role": "user"
},
{
"content": "Yeah, well it was. I, I broke a cup.",
"role": "assistant"
},
{
"content": "Well, I'm off to Carol's.",
"role": "user"
},
{
"content": "Ooh, ooh! Why don't we invite her?",
"role": "assistant"
},
{
"content": "(mimicking) Ooh, ooh. Because she's my ex-wife, and will probably want to bring her, ooh, ooh, lesbian life partner.",
"role": "user"
}
] |
[
{
"content": "Hi, is uh, is Carol here?",
"role": "assistant"
}
] |
[
{
"content": "Oh, I uh, just came by to pick up my skull. Well, not mine, but...Susan",
"role": "user"
},
{
"content": "Thanks. Yeah, Carol borrowed it for a class, and I have to get it back to the museum.",
"role": "assistant"
}
] |
[
{
"content": "Kinda like a big face without skin.",
"role": "user"
}
] |
[
{
"content": "Ok. (browsing the apartment) Wow, you guys sure have a lot of books about bein' a lesbian.",
"role": "assistant"
}
] |
[
{
"content": "(picking up a book) Hey, hey, Yertle the Turtle. A classic.",
"role": "user"
}
] |
[
{
"content": "The uh, the baby that hasn't been born yet? Wouldn't that mean you're... crazy?",
"role": "assistant"
}
] |
[
{
"content": "You're not serious, I mean, you really... you really talk to it?",
"role": "user"
}
] |
[
{
"content": "Do you uh, do you talk about me?",
"role": "assistant"
}
] |
[
{
"content": "Really?",
"role": "user"
}
] |
[
{
"content": "Look, if she's talking to it, I just think that I should get some belly time too. Not that I believe any of this.",
"role": "assistant"
},
{
"content": "Oh, I believe it. I think the baby can totally hear everything. I can show you. Look, this will seem a little weird, but you put your head inside this turkey, and then we'll all talk, and you'll hear everything we say.",
"role": "user"
},
{
"content": "I'd just like to say that I'm totally behind this experiment. In fact, I'd very much like to butter your head.",
"role": "assistant"
}
] |
[
{
"content": "Hey, Rach, did you make your money?",
"role": "user"
},
{
"content": "No, not even close. Forget Vail, forget seeing my family, forget shoop, shoop, shoop.",
"role": "assistant"
},
{
"content": "Rach, here's your mail.",
"role": "user"
},
{
"content": "Thanks, you can just put it on the table.",
"role": "assistant"
},
{
"content": "(insistently) No, here's your mail.",
"role": "user"
},
{
"content": "Thanks, you can just put it on the table.",
"role": "assistant"
},
{
"content": "(gives her an envelope) Would you just open it?",
"role": "user"
}
] |
[
{
"content": "Oh my god, oh, you guys are great.",
"role": "assistant"
},
{
"content": "We all chipped in.",
"role": "user"
},
{
"content": "(to Monica) We did?",
"role": "assistant"
},
{
"content": "(to Joey) You owe me 20 bucks.",
"role": "user"
},
{
"content": "Thank you. Thank you so much!",
"role": "assistant"
},
{
"content": "(hands Chandler a bag) Chandler, here you go, got your traditional Thanksgiving feast, you got your tomato soup, your grilled cheese fixin's, and your family size bag of Funyuns.",
"role": "user"
},
{
"content": "Wait, wait, Chandler, this is what you're havin' for Thanksgiving dinner? What, what, what is it with you and this holiday?",
"role": "assistant"
},
{
"content": "All right, I'm nine years old.",
"role": "user"
},
{
"content": "Oh, I hate this story.",
"role": "assistant"
},
{
"content": "We just finished this magnificent Thanksgiving dinner. I have--and I remember this part vividly--a mouthful of pumpkin pie, and this is the moment my parents choose to tell me they're getting divorced.",
"role": "user"
},
{
"content": "Oh my god.",
"role": "assistant"
},
{
"content": "Yes. It's very difficult to appreciate a Thanksgiving dinner once you've seen it in reverse.",
"role": "user"
}
] |
[
{
"content": "Uh, hi. We uh, we used to work together.",
"role": "assistant"
}
] |
[
{
"content": "Yeah, at Macy's. You were the Obsession girl, right? I was the Aramis guy. (pretends to spray cologne) Aramis? Aramis?",
"role": "user"
}
] |
[
{
"content": "I gotta tell you. You're the best in the business.",
"role": "assistant"
}
] |
[
{
"content": "I'm serious. You're amazing. You know when to spritz, when to lay back.",
"role": "user"
}
] |
[
{
"content": "Ooh, you smell great tonight. What're you wearing?",
"role": "assistant"
}
] |
[
{
"content": "Listen, uh, you wanna go get a drink or something?",
"role": "user"
}
] |
[
{
"content": "What's wrong?",
"role": "assistant"
}
] |
[
{
"content": "Oh. What?",
"role": "user"
}
] |
[
{
"content": "Wait, wait, wait!",
"role": "assistant"
}
] |
[
{
"content": "So I guess you all saw it.",
"role": "user"
},
{
"content": "Saw what?",
"role": "assistant"
},
{
"content": "No, we were just laughing. You know, how laughter can be infectious.",
"role": "user"
}
] |
[
{
"content": "Set another place for Thanksgiving. My entire family thinks I have VD.",
"role": "assistant"
},
{
"content": "Tonight, on a very special Blossom.",
"role": "user"
}
] |
[
{
"content": "Mmm, looking good. Ok, cider's mulling, turkey's turking, yams are yamming. (notices Ross is depressed) What?",
"role": "assistant"
},
{
"content": "I don't know. It's just not the same without Mom in the kitchen.",
"role": "user"
},
{
"content": "All right, that's it. You know what? Just get out of my way and stop moping.",
"role": "assistant"
},
{
"content": "That's closer.",
"role": "user"
}
] |
[
{
"content": "I got the tickets! I got the tickets! Five hours from now, shoop, shoop, shoop.",
"role": "assistant"
},
{
"content": "Oh, you must stop shooping.",
"role": "user"
},
{
"content": "Ok, I'm gonna get my stuff.",
"role": "assistant"
},
{
"content": "Chandler, will you just come in already?",
"role": "user"
},
{
"content": "No, I prefer to keep a safe distance from all this merriment.",
"role": "assistant"
}
] |
[
{
"content": "Look out, incoming pumpkin pie!",
"role": "user"
},
{
"content": "Ok, we all laughed when you did it with the stuffing, but that's not funny anymore.",
"role": "assistant"
}
] |
[
{
"content": "Hey, Monica, I got a question. I don't see any tater tots.",
"role": "user"
},
{
"content": "That's not a question.",
"role": "assistant"
},
{
"content": "But my mom always makes them. It's like a tradition. You get a little piece of turkey on your fork, a little cranberry sauce, and a tot! It's bad enough I can't be with my family because of my disease.",
"role": "user"
},
{
"content": "All right, fine. Tonight's potatoes will be both mashed with lumps, and in the form of tots.",
"role": "assistant"
},
{
"content": "Ok, I'm off to talk to my unborn child.",
"role": "user"
}
] |
[
{
"content": "Ah!",
"role": "assistant"
},
{
"content": "Ok, Mom never hit.",
"role": "user"
}
] |
[
{
"content": "(stirring pot) Ok, all done.",
"role": "assistant"
},
{
"content": "What, Phoebe, did you whip the potatoes? Ross needs lumps!",
"role": "user"
},
{
"content": "Oh, I'm sorry, oh, I just, I thought we could have them whipped and then add some peas and onions.",
"role": "assistant"
},
{
"content": "Why would we do that?",
"role": "user"
},
{
"content": "Well, 'cause then they'd be like my mom used to make them, you know, before she died.",
"role": "assistant"
},
{
"content": "Ok, three kinds of potatoes coming up.",
"role": "user"
},
{
"content": "Ok, good-bye you guys. Thanks for everything. (she starts to leave, and hits everyone with her skis) Oh, sorry! Oh, sorry!",
"role": "assistant"
}
] |
[
{
"content": "The most unbelievable thing has happened. Underdog has just gotten away.",
"role": "user"
},
{
"content": "The balloon?",
"role": "assistant"
},
{
"content": "No, no, the actual cartoon character. Of course the balloon. It's all over the news. Right before he reached Macy's, he broke free and was spotted flying over Washington Square Park. I'm goin' to the roof, who's with me?",
"role": "user"
},
{
"content": "I can't, I gotta go.",
"role": "assistant"
},
{
"content": "Come on. An 80-foot inflatable dog let loose over the city. How often does that happen?",
"role": "user"
},
{
"content": "Almost never.",
"role": "assistant"
},
{
"content": "Got the keys? or Got the keys!",
"role": "user"
},
{
"content": "Ok.",
"role": "assistant"
}
] |
[
{
"content": "Ok, ok, here we go. (he crouches down near her stomach) Ok, where am I talking to, here? I mean, uh, well, there is one way that seems to offer a certain acoustical advantage, but...",
"role": "user"
}
] |
[
{
"content": "Ok, ok, ok, ok, here goes. You know, I, you know, can't do this. Uh, this is too weird. I feel stupid.",
"role": "assistant"
}
] |
[
{
"content": "(quickly talking) Hello, baby. Hello, hello.",
"role": "user"
}
] |
[
{
"content": "I loved the moment when you first saw the giant dog shadow all over the park.",
"role": "assistant"
},
{
"content": "Yeah, but did they have to shoot him down? I mean, that was just mean.",
"role": "user"
},
{
"content": "Ok, right about now the turkey should be crispy on the outside, juicy on the inside. Why are we standing here?",
"role": "assistant"
},
{
"content": "We're waiting for you to open the door. You got the keys.",
"role": "user"
},
{
"content": "No I don't.",
"role": "assistant"
},
{
"content": "Yes, you do. When we left, you said, \"got the keys.\"",
"role": "user"
},
{
"content": "No I didn't. I asked, \"got the ke-eys?\"",
"role": "assistant"
},
{
"content": "No, no, no, you said, \"got the keys\".",
"role": "user"
},
{
"content": "Do either of you have the keys?",
"role": "assistant"
},
{
"content": "(panicked) The oven is on.",
"role": "user"
},
{
"content": "Oh, I gotta get my ticket!",
"role": "assistant"
},
{
"content": "Wait, wait, we have a copy of your key.",
"role": "user"
},
{
"content": "Well then get it, get it!",
"role": "assistant"
},
{
"content": "That tone will not make me go any faster.",
"role": "user"
},
{
"content": "(angry) Joey!",
"role": "assistant"
},
{
"content": "That one will.",
"role": "user"
}
] |
[
{
"content": "And everyone's telling me, you gotta pick a major, you gotta pick a major. So, on a dare, I picked paleontology. And you have no idea what I'm saying, because, let's face it, you're a fetus. You're just happy you don't have gills anymore.",
"role": "assistant"
}
] |
[
{
"content": "Oh, please. I am not singing to your stomach, ok?",
"role": "user"
}
] |
[
{
"content": "Shh! (singing) Here we come, walkin' down the street, get the funniest looks from, everyone we meet. Hey, hey! (to Carol) Hey, uh, did you just feel that?",
"role": "assistant"
}
] |
[
{
"content": "Does it always, uh--?",
"role": "user"
}
] |
[
{
"content": "(singing) Hey, hey, you're my baby, and I can't wait to meet you. When you come out I'll buy you a bagel, and then we'll go to the zoo.",
"role": "assistant"
}
] |
[
{
"content": "(singin) Hey, hey, I'm your daddy. I'm the one without any breasts.",
"role": "user"
}
] |
[
{
"content": "Nope, not that one.",
"role": "assistant"
},
{
"content": "Can you go any faster with that?",
"role": "user"
},
{
"content": "Hey, I got one keyhole and about a zillion keys. You do the math.",
"role": "assistant"
},
{
"content": "Why do you guys have so many keys in there anyway?",
"role": "user"
},
{
"content": "(sarcastic) For an emergency just like this.",
"role": "assistant"
},
{
"content": "(grabs Chandler by the shirt) All right, listen, smirky. If it wasn't for you and your stupid balloon, I would be on a plane watching a woman do this (makes a gesture like a stewardess pointing out exits) right now. But I'm not.",
"role": "user"
},
{
"content": "I swear you said you had the keys.",
"role": "assistant"
},
{
"content": "No, I didn't. I wouldn't say I had the keys unless I had the keys, and I obviously didn't have the keys.",
"role": "user"
},
{
"content": "Ooh, ok, that's it. Enough with the keys. No one say keys.",
"role": "assistant"
}
] |
[
{
"content": "Why would I have the keys?",
"role": "user"
},
{
"content": "Aside from the fact that you said you had them?",
"role": "assistant"
},
{
"content": "But I didn't.",
"role": "user"
},
{
"content": "Well, you should have.",
"role": "assistant"
},
{
"content": "Why?",
"role": "user"
},
{
"content": "Because!",
"role": "assistant"
},
{
"content": "Why?",
"role": "user"
},
{
"content": "Because!",
"role": "assistant"
},
{
"content": "Why? Because everything is my responsibility? Isn't it enough that I'm making Thanksgiving dinner for everyone? You know, everyone wants a different kind of potatoes, so I'm making different kinds of potatoes. Does anybody care what kind of potatoes I want? Nooooo, no, no! (starting to cry) Just as long as Phoebe gets her peas and onions, and Mario gets his tots, and it's my first Thanksgiving, and it's all burned, and, and I... I...",
"role": "user"
},
{
"content": "Ok, Monica, only dogs can hear you now, so, look, the door's open. Here we go.",
"role": "assistant"
}
] |
[
{
"content": "Well, the turkey's burnt. (checking pots) Potatoes are ruined, potatoes are ruined, potatoes are ruined.",
"role": "user"
}
] |
[
{
"content": "Here we come, walkin' down thethis doesn't smell like Mom's.",
"role": "assistant"
},
{
"content": "No, it doesn't, does it? But you wanted lumps, Ross? (picks up the pan of badly burnt potatoes) Well, here you go, buddy, ya got one.",
"role": "user"
},
{
"content": "Oh, god, this is great! The plane is gone, so it looks like I'm stuck here with you guys.",
"role": "assistant"
},
{
"content": "Hey, we all had better plans. This was nobody's first choice.",
"role": "user"
},
{
"content": "Oh, really? So why was I busting my ass to make this delicious Thanksgiving dinner?",
"role": "assistant"
},
{
"content": "You call that delicious?",
"role": "user"
}
] |
[
{
"content": "Stop it, stop it, stop it!",
"role": "assistant"
},
{
"content": "Now this feels like Thanksgiving.",
"role": "user"
}
] |
[
{
"content": "Ooh.",
"role": "assistant"
},
{
"content": "What?",
"role": "user"
},
{
"content": "Ugly Naked Guy's taking his turkey out of the oven. Oh my god. He's not alone. Ugly Naked Guy's having Thanksgiving dinner with Ugly Naked Gal.",
"role": "assistant"
}
] |
[
{
"content": "I've gotta see this. All right Ugly Naked Guy!",
"role": "user"
},
{
"content": "Ooh, Ugly Naked Dancing!",
"role": "assistant"
},
{
"content": "It's nice that he has someone.",
"role": "user"
}
] |
[
{
"content": "Shall I carve?",
"role": "assistant"
},
{
"content": "By all means.",
"role": "user"
},
{
"content": "Ok, who wants light cheese, and who wants dark cheese?",
"role": "assistant"
},
{
"content": "I don't even wanna know about the dark cheese.",
"role": "user"
},
{
"content": "(holding sandwich) Does anybody wanna split this with me?",
"role": "assistant"
},
{
"content": "Oh, I will.",
"role": "user"
},
{
"content": "Ooh, you guys have to make a wish.",
"role": "assistant"
},
{
"content": "Make a wish?",
"role": "user"
},
{
"content": "Come on, you know, Thanksgiving. Ooh, you got the bigger half. What'd you wish for?",
"role": "assistant"
},
{
"content": "The bigger half.",
"role": "user"
},
{
"content": "I'd like to propose a toast. Little toast here, ding ding. I know this isn't the kind of Thanksgiving that all of you all planned, but for me, this has been really great, you know, I think because it didn't involve divorce or projectile vomiting. Anyway, I was just thinking, I mean, if you'd gone to Vail, and if you guys'd been with your family, if you didn't have syphilis and stuff, we wouldn't be all together, you know? So I guess what I'm trying to say is that I'm very thankful that all of your Thanksgivings sucked.",
"role": "assistant"
}
] |
[
{
"content": "And hey, here's to a lousy Christmas.",
"role": "user"
},
{
"content": "And a crappy New Year.",
"role": "assistant"
},
{
"content": "Here, here!",
"role": "user"
}
] |
[
{
"content": "Guys? There's a somebody I'd like you to meet.",
"role": "assistant"
}
] |
[
{
"content": "W-wait. What is that?",
"role": "user"
},
{
"content": "'That' would be Marcel. You wanna say hi?",
"role": "assistant"
},
{
"content": "No, no, I don't.",
"role": "user"
},
{
"content": "Oh, he is precious! Where did you get him?",
"role": "assistant"
},
{
"content": "My friend Bethel rescued him from some lab.",
"role": "user"
},
{
"content": "That is so cruel! Why? Why would a parent name their child Bethel?",
"role": "assistant"
},
{
"content": "Hey, that monkey's got a Ross on its ass!",
"role": "user"
},
{
"content": "Ross, is he gonna live with you, like, in your apartment?",
"role": "assistant"
},
{
"content": "Yeah. I mean, it's been kinda quiet since Carol left, so...",
"role": "user"
},
{
"content": "Why don't you just get a roommate?",
"role": "assistant"
},
{
"content": "Nah, I dunno... I think you reach a certain age, having a roommate is kinda pathe- (Realises) ....sorry, that's, that's 'pathet', which is Sanskrit for 'really cool way to live'.",
"role": "user"
}
] |
[
{
"content": "So you guys, I'm doing all new material tonight. I have twelve new songs about my mother's suicide, and one about a snowman.",
"role": "assistant"
},
{
"content": "Might wanna open with the snowman.",
"role": "user"
}
] |
[
{
"content": "So, how'd it go?",
"role": "assistant"
},
{
"content": "Ahhhhhh, I didn't get the job.",
"role": "user"
},
{
"content": "How could you not get it? You were Santa last year.",
"role": "assistant"
},
{
"content": "I dunno. Some fat guy's sleeping with the store manager. He's not even jolly, it's all political.",
"role": "user"
},
{
"content": "So what are you gonna be?",
"role": "assistant"
},
{
"content": "Ah, I'm gonna be one of his helpers. It's just such a slap in the face, y'know?",
"role": "user"
},
{
"content": "Hey, do you guys know what you're doing for New Year's? (They all protest and hit her with cushions) Gee, what?! What is wrong with New Year's?",
"role": "assistant"
},
{
"content": "Nothing for you, you have Paolo. You don't have to face the horrible pressures of this holiday",
"role": "user"
},
{
"content": "Well, for your information, Paolo is gonna be in Rome this New Year, so I'll be just as pathetic as the rest of you.",
"role": "assistant"
},
{
"content": "Yeah, you wish!",
"role": "user"
},
{
"content": "It's just that I'm sick of being a victim of this Dick Clark holiday. I say this year, no dates, we make a pact. Just the six of us- dinner.",
"role": "assistant"
}
] |
[
{
"content": "Y'know, I was hoping for a little more enthusiasm.",
"role": "user"
}
] |
[
{
"content": "Phoebe, you're on.",
"role": "assistant"
},
{
"content": "Oh, oh, good.",
"role": "user"
},
{
"content": "(Into microphone) Okay, hi. Ladies and gentlemen, back by popular demand, Miss Phoebe Buffay. Wooh!",
"role": "assistant"
},
{
"content": "(Takes mike) Thanks, hi. Um, I wanna start with a song that means a lot to me this time of year. (Shakes bell as an introduction) (Sung",
"role": "user"
}
] |
[
{
"content": "(Sung)",
"role": "assistant"
}
] |
[
{
"content": "(Sung)",
"role": "user"
}
] |
[
{
"content": "Well, c'mon, if it's important enough to discuss while I'm playing, then I assume it's important enough for everyone else to hear!",
"role": "assistant"
},
{
"content": "(Quietly, to the others) That guy's going home with a note!",
"role": "user"
}
] |
[
{
"content": "Could you speak up please?",
"role": "assistant"
}
] |
[
{
"content": "Okay, we're gonna take a short break. (Goes over to their table)",
"role": "user"
},
{
"content": "Hey, that guy's going home with more than a note!",
"role": "assistant"
}
] |
[
{
"content": "Come here, Marcel. Sit here. (Marcel wanders off)",
"role": "user"
},
{
"content": "Pheebs, I can't believe he hasn't kissed you yet. I mean God, by my sixth date with Paolo, I mean he had already named both my breasts! ...Ooh. Did I just share too much?",
"role": "assistant"
},
{
"content": "Just a smidge.",
"role": "user"
},
{
"content": "David's like, y'know, Scientist Guy. He's very methodical.",
"role": "assistant"
},
{
"content": "I think it's romantic.",
"role": "user"
},
{
"content": "Me too! Oh! Did you ever see An Officer and a Gentleman?",
"role": "assistant"
},
{
"content": "Yeah!",
"role": "user"
},
{
"content": "Well, he's kinda like the guy I went to see that with. Except, except he-he's smarter, and gentler, and sweeter... I just- I just wanna be with him all the time. Day and night, and night and day... and special occasions...",
"role": "assistant"
},
{
"content": "Wait a minute, wait a minute, I see where this is going, you're gonna ask him to New Year's, aren't you. You're gonna break the pact. She's gonna break the pact.",
"role": "user"
},
{
"content": "No, no, no, no, no, no. Yeah, could I just?",
"role": "assistant"
},
{
"content": "Yeah, 'cause I already asked Janice.",
"role": "user"
},
{
"content": "What?!",
"role": "assistant"
},
{
"content": "C'mon, this was a pact! This was your pact!",
"role": "user"
},
{
"content": "I snapped, okay? I couldn't handle the pressure and I snapped.",
"role": "assistant"
},
{
"content": "Yeah, but Janice? That-that was like the worst breakup in history!",
"role": "user"
},
{
"content": "I'm not saying it was a good idea, I'm saying I snapped!",
"role": "assistant"
}
] |
[
{
"content": "Hi. Hi, sorry I'm late.",
"role": "user"
}
] |
[
{
"content": "Too many jokes... must mock Joey!",
"role": "assistant"
},
{
"content": "Nice shoes, huh? (He wiggles his foot and the bells tinkle)",
"role": "user"
},
{
"content": "Aah, y'killing me!",
"role": "assistant"
}
] |
[
{
"content": "Ross! He's playing with my spatulas again!",
"role": "user"
},
{
"content": "Okay, look, he's not gonna hurt them, right?",
"role": "assistant"
},
{
"content": "Do you always have to bring him here?",
"role": "user"
},
{
"content": "I didn't wanna leave him alone. Alright? We- we had our first fight this morning. I think it has to do with my working late. I said some things that I didn't mean, and he- he threw some faeces...",
"role": "assistant"
},
{
"content": "Y'know, if you're gonna work late, I could look in on him for you.",
"role": "user"
},
{
"content": "Oh, that'd be great! Okay, but if you do, make sure it seems like you're there to see him, okay, and you're not like doing it as a favour to me.",
"role": "assistant"
},
{
"content": "Okay, but if he asks, I'm not going to lie.",
"role": "user"
}
] |
[
{
"content": "Okay, alright, I have a question, then.",
"role": "assistant"
}
] |
[
{
"content": "Um, were you planning on kissing me ever?",
"role": "user"
}
] |
[
{
"content": "Sure.",
"role": "assistant"
}
] |
[
{
"content": "Oh, David, I, I think you are a sweeping sorta fella. I mean, you're a sweeper! ...trapped inside a physicist's body.",
"role": "user"
}
] |
[
{
"content": "Oh, yeah, oh, I'm sure of it. You should just do it, just sweep and throw me.",
"role": "assistant"
}
] |
[
{
"content": "Oh yeah, right now.",
"role": "user"
}
] |
[
{
"content": "Okay, now you're just kinda tidying.",
"role": "assistant"
}
] |
[
{
"content": "I can hop. (She hops onto the table)",
"role": "user"
}
] |
[
{
"content": "So tell me something. What does the phrase 'no date pact' mean to you?",
"role": "assistant"
},
{
"content": "I'm sorry, okay. It's just that Chandler has somebody, and Phoebe has somebody- I thought I'd ask Fun Bobby.",
"role": "user"
},
{
"content": "Fun Bobby? Your ex-boyfriend Fun Bobby?",
"role": "assistant"
},
{
"content": "Yeah.",
"role": "user"
},
{
"content": "You know more than one Fun Bobby?",
"role": "assistant"
},
{
"content": "I happen to know a Fun Bob.",
"role": "user"
},
{
"content": "(Brings Joey a mug of coffee) Okay, here we go...",
"role": "assistant"
},
{
"content": "Ooh ooh ooh ooh, there's no room for milk!",
"role": "user"
},
{
"content": "(Glances at Joey and then sips his coffee) There. Now there is.",
"role": "assistant"
},
{
"content": "Okay, so on our no-date evening, three of you now have dates.",
"role": "user"
},
{
"content": "Uh, four.",
"role": "assistant"
},
{
"content": "Four.",
"role": "user"
},
{
"content": "Five.",
"role": "assistant"
},
{
"content": "Five. (Buries his head in his hands)",
"role": "user"
},
{
"content": "Sorry. Paolo's catching an earlier flight.",
"role": "assistant"
},
{
"content": "Yeah, and I met this really hot single mom at the store. What's an elf to do?",
"role": "user"
},
{
"content": "Okay, so I'm gonna be the only one standing there alone when the ball drops?",
"role": "assistant"
},
{
"content": "Oh, c'mon. We'll have, we'll have a big party, and no-one'll know who's with who.",
"role": "user"
},
{
"content": "Hey, y'know, this is so not what I needed right now.",
"role": "assistant"
},
{
"content": "What's the matter?",
"role": "user"
},
{
"content": "Oh, it's-it's Marcel. He keeps shutting me out, y'know? He's walking around all the time dragging his hands...",
"role": "assistant"
},
{
"content": "That's so weird, I had such a blast with him the other night.",
"role": "user"
},
{
"content": "Really.",
"role": "assistant"
},
{
"content": "Yeah, we played, we watched TV.. that juggling thing is amazing.",
"role": "user"
},
{
"content": "What, uh... what juggling thing?",
"role": "assistant"
},
{
"content": "With the balled-up socks? I figured you taught him that.",
"role": "user"
},
{
"content": "No.",
"role": "assistant"
},
{
"content": "Y'know, it wasn't that big a deal. He just balled up socks... and a melon...",
"role": "user"
}
] |
[
{
"content": "Oh, hi Max! Hey, do you know everybody?",
"role": "assistant"
}
] |
[
{
"content": "No, no, he hasn't been around.",
"role": "user"
}
] |
[
{
"content": "Minsk?",
"role": "assistant"
}
] |
[
{
"content": "I know where Minsk is.",
"role": "user"
}
] |
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