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again, you're preaching a word there,
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to that area. so, of course, other things are just going to not be functioning and for a long term
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physically lose your toes from being in the cold. it's like from being negative and creating that response in your body
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yes. i'm super excited because in just a couple days,
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well maybe by the time you hear this, it'll be already done. but i am now opening up enrollment for first class life academy cohort,
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amazon, number one bestselling authors.yes, yes, yes. it was, see that was one of those moments where i felt like a proud mama bear.
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that journey, you better get on it. do you have a wait list open now, or can-
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welcome back to the podcast everybody. today i have tiffany wiggins of black girl mentor
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and she's going to come on and share with us about her platform and her story. i'm going to let her introduce herself a little more
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this whole platform came out of me doing research. i was pursuing my phd, and of course i had to come up with a topic
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that led me to really focus in on black women in the field, to be honest
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and just really trying to balance all the things. and then of course this
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working life, so to speak. and that was really kind of how i started it,
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had some women in my corner who were pushing me along and checking in on me and all that stuff. but then there were some other folks who i thought would be doing the same thing.
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creating a platform, some space where people who kind of believe the... there is power in mentorship because you look at the research
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there are tons of benefits to it and men are gaining all
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and we've had those same experiences and
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a prime opportunity for a black woman in leadership to just have this ...
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well, what's the issue here? and then as we began to leave
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it was very surface level relationship. and then
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my best friend was there too, and we were just talking about it, just like
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some of what has been ingrained into us as women, and black women, is that-
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while we say, oh, it's only me, we've been conditioned to believe that there's only room for me. so you get, especially the ones who are older than
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i can't bring them up because they're going to replace me.
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instead of seeing the width that it could be all of us up here and i can bring more along.but
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i do have a black female mentor that i just looked up on. she came into one of my first workplaces as
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it ended up being great. we still talk. any job i think about applying to or any opportunity or
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thing in higher ed, i think about pursuing, i send to her first
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and so that's been a great relationship. and so i would think if i didn't have that
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i probably would miss out on so much stuff or not think about so many things. so i think it's very important what you're doing. and when i saw your dissertation, i was just like, oh yes
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and i have respect, and i have position, and i have power, and i probably can release some
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yeah, there's some work to be done for sure, but at the same time, there are those women. and i'm trying to figure out now, is it a generational thing? because i am finding too that ...
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place i'm at now, i had someone who came into the university after me.
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and then reach out to me to take me out to
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do stuff. and i was just like, i like this and appreciate this because she's doing things, writing books, has her doctorate. it's like
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she came in and kind of grabbed me and i really appreciated that
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if i'm great alone, then bringing you with me, we're only going to ...
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doing how to go out for things, so i really took her under my wing too. and it's just like if i hadn't had people do that for me
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in terms of, in the scope of mentorship. so there's this woman who
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she's the only one, she's doing all the things. she likes to be the go-to person
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and then there's the princess bee where she also has power and position
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take things in her... it's like, oh it must be me or i don't know why she doesn't like me or whatever
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it absolutely is and it's like... i think it also plays into the overall culture of like...
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in general, for developing staff
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the fear that a lot of organizations and universities have that people are going to
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but i don't want you to get too good because you're going to be better than me but be better than me...yes.... in this part. and that's always my thing. i'm like, i want to develop...
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and we can all shine bright together because i'm like, if they stay, i now have the greatest people working for me
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... i don't want to be those. i don't want to be the person they come to all the time. i don't want to be the only one who can figure out the stuff i want, every...
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... cause it weighs on you to be the smartest person in the room and you are growing.
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i tell a lot of people who haven't worked in higher education, it's like a old guard of holding onto the oldest of thick processes
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craziest thing. and so a lot of this stuff, this is like-
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holding onto everything they do. if such and such retires, the entire knowledge of the department goes with them. it's like
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graham means so much to you or that department.
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so keep that going. let that be your legacy. and i think that's what part of mentoring is to me
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i don't know, i'm learning how to crochet. because i don't know, so help me out. you know what i mean? if you see me, if are a master crochet-
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crochet, sewer, or whatever. and that's what i want to learn, then help me out. if i'm struggling as a new mom, then
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peloton communities and they actually
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we're not leaving you behind. we're riding together. if somebody needs help, if they're struggling,
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who will work out and work out with this thing, and it's like we're supportive-
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make sure you take some time to really
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and a lot of times when i'm presenting, i'm presenting about-
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so you have younger students or grad students or entry level.
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and it goes both ways. yes, you want to learn, but-
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if i say, oh i'll commit to an hour a month with you, then let's make sure we maximize-
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get doing something too. it's like, and that could even be you just making sure you're going to put into action.
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we're talking about the conference thing. it's like everything isn't a mentorship. it may be that-
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the person's time and it's like you getting what you actually want. so like you said, that is important to really know what they're seeking.
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so i was checking on them to just see what's going on, but i was actually-
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i think that's important, too. and i didn't even-
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i didn't even realize it until i had a couple of mentors and one of my mentors is a white male president of a university.
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think i may want to be a provost and possibly a president maybe one day.
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i'm about to get my edd. let me see what it's like.
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and all of the crazy stuff that's just going on in higher education anyway with numbers and-
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have that ear because now it was just like we met the other week and i was just like, what is going on?
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what has been going on with you? what, who?
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what kind of counsel have you been under? and i'm just like, "how are you?"
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and, i was just like, "do you have people around you?"
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the relationship, it's just not always transactional in your career. you have to think about those elements too. and those are the parts that sometimes mean the most.
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... may be in a position to be a mentor but has been trepidacious about doing so.
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i'm just not quite sure, to be very honest with them. i would love to serve in this role for you ...
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this is what i can give at this time, these are the places.
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i will try my best to refer you to somebody else. just to be honest up-
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that gives that mentee the opportunity to say, "well that's not the type of relationship i was looking for" or, "okay, i totally understand and it's worth it for us to at least have-"
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yes. you can't be all things to all people. that is good advice. and that takes the pressure off of the person, like you said,
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yeah thanks for asking. so black guy july is what it's called. my series...
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but ironically one of the gentlemen, who is featured on this in the series-
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black guy, july, it all makes sense. it all works. but i just really wanted to highlight four different gentlemen.
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then yields this conversation about black men and black women and how they are.
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so my hope is that those conversations will continue in-
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to speak the name of black women or bring black women up. because i think a lot of times when people do think "black", the default becomes men.
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she had him do her after special ig live.
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that we can do this with. and i think that that relationship can go the other way.
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so that's really what's happening. in the meantime, continue to-
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absolutely. thank you so much for joining me. and you're it's black girl.
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so it's interesting that you noted that your blog started off about your divorce because that's kind of what we're talking about.
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i really wanted my privacy. i didn't want to be around anybody. and then being with my mom all the time, it was just like-
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i started doing a lot of self-healing. i would do a lot of writing. i would do-
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once i was away, i was like, i'm going to do what i want to do and cut my hair and it was like a-
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but my main source of healing came from my blogging and just getting my truth out there, letting things come out.
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they don't really have the best advice because-
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