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7,501 | daddit | This post has been flaired "Support". Moderation is stricter here and unsupportive and unpleasant comments will be removed and result in a ban. *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/daddit) if you have any questions or concerns.* |
7,502 | daddit | Circle the wagons Dads. Whatever you need OP. DM. |
7,503 | daddit | There's 605,000 dads subscribed to this sub and I'd wager that every one of us would love to talk if you need to. There's not one person who reads your post who won't be thinking about you and wishing you the best. I know you're going to feel so alone, but I hope you're able to hold your sons as tight as possible. |
7,504 | daddit | Thanks for the support. Still trying to get someone on the phone to give me details about what happened. I just want to see my baby girl. She was my oldest, my first born. I was only 20 when she was born and we have been through hell together and individually. She has two little brothers who will be awake soon and I have no clue how to deal with this. I just want to hold my baby girl. And no one so far will give me any real answers or details. It's maddening. |
7,505 | daddit | People will have far more to give advise wise than me, but you have all my love and thoughts tonight mate. |
7,506 | daddit | You no more failed her than if she died from cancer. Suicide is 99.9% of the time a result of mental illness. Mental illness killed your daughter. Just like cancer kills people. |
7,507 | daddit | I'm so sorry, please take care of yourselves and loved ones, don't be afraid to heal. I'm so sorry for your loss |
7,508 | daddit | Hi, I'm not a dad but I'm the daughter who wanted to off herself, I've seen the effects it's had on my parents, and I've had people blame their suicide attempts on me when I was just trying to help. I don't know if you want advice right now, or if I'm echoing what you already know but I wanted to comment some advice so it's here if and when you do want it. Sometimes we also need people to keep telling us what we already know. What's happened is tragic, I'm so sorry your daughter has died. Please allow yourself the time and space you need, forgive yourself because you couldn't have known what would happen. Yes parents are responsible to protect their kids but it's impossible to protect them from everything, you did the best you could with the information and knowledge you had at the time. From my experience, your daughter didn't do this because you failed or you weren't a good enough reason for her to stay alive. She didn't see another way out and couldn't stand feeling how she did and experiencing what she was experiencing any longer. It takes 1000 positives to cancel out 1 negative, depression halves the effectiveness of those positives and doubles the amount needed. Please keep talking to your 2 boys. As much as they need to be emotionally open to you, you need to be open with them (to an appropriate level of course) because that reciprocation will keep them talking and help you all recover from this. They're going to feel some form of what you're feeling, like they weren't a good enough reason for her to stay and like they failed to help their sister. I saw you mentioned feeling a familiarity because you've been experiencing a lot of deaths however, this is likely going to traumatise you and you might not feel it now but you could 2,3,4 years down the line. Please go to therapy because my parents still walk on eggshells now not wanting to set off my depression despite me being okay now, I've walked on the same eggshells because of others even if they weren't the suicidal/ depressed person and I don't wish that tension on anyone. I didn't properly feel the effects until 3 years later. The nightmares that started after those 3 years as well as the fact I couldn't go near areas with thudding anymore should've been a good enough reason to start therapy sooner than suffer for a year and let the trauma negatively affect those around me. It's an awesome move that you're already looking at getting your boys into counselling, give yourself the same kindness. And all of this goes for your daughter's mum if she's in the picture too. I wish you all well and hope you all recover from this!! (message me if you want I don't know what else I can tell you but I'd like to be as supportive as I can) |
7,509 | daddit | If you would like to tell us about her, I’d be honored to listen. _Typing this through blurry eyes_ |
7,510 | daddit | My sincerest condolences, I hope you are able to find some peace. Sounds like you have other kids. Its probably a good idea that you guys guys seek a psychiatrist to talk things out. If any of you need medication then take it, this is what it is for. |
7,511 | daddit | 1. It’s not your fault. You didn’t fail her. Can’t stress that enough. 2. Reach out for help: friends, therapy, etc. And since I’m the praying type, I will be praying for you and all who love your daughter. |
7,512 | daddit | Holy crap man, that's awful. I know that no words can change a thing, but if you need to talk to rant drop me a DM. I hope you've got family or friends close by to support you. Lean on them. It's natural to feel like this is your fault, because you're a dad, and that's what dad's do. We catch them when they fall, and if we can't we do whatever it takes to make it better. Right now, you need to figure out what she needs you to do for her. Look to your family, her friends, her school mates. Look after the people who loved her, and honour her memory together. Your a dad, and dad's get shit done. You can get though this. You got this. :Dad Hugs: |
7,513 | daddit | I'm sorry. There are a lot of things we can control and a lot more we can't. |
7,514 | daddit | Holy shit I am so sorry! I cant imagine what you must be going through now. Please take care of yourself and dont take on too much blame. |
7,515 | daddit | Hey man; I don’t have anything to say to you that really means anything, but I wanted to chime in and say I work with a guy whose daughter took her life at a similar age. He has mentioned several times over the years how helpful therapy was for him. I hope it can be helpful for you too. |
7,516 | daddit | There's nothing I can say that you haven't already heard OP, but read this comment from u/GSnow when you get a chance. I'm pretty sure it's saved quite a few lives over the years. https://www.reddit.com/r/Assistance/comments/hax0t/my_friend_just_died_i_dont_know_what_to_do |
7,517 | daddit | First off, I’m incredibly sorry for your loss. You’re going to find your strength in focusing on raising your other two children. They need you now more than ever. |
7,518 | daddit | I’m so sorry bro… |
7,519 | daddit | You didn’t fail. I know it’s hard to believe or accept but you didn’t fail her. |
7,520 | daddit | We are here for you. DM if you want to talk. |
7,521 | daddit | I lost my daughter 4 and a half years ago to a random fucking illness just two weeks after she graduated from high school. There are no words to describe the absolute black hole of excruciating pain that opened up inside me after that, and nobody has ever said a damn thing to me that makes the depths of that black hole hurt any less. After a while, though, when I was ready, I got into therapy, and that has helped me to accept the ongoing existence of the black hole and learn how to pull myself out of it. It still hasn't gone away (and to be honest, I don't think I would want it to), but I don't fall in quite so often anymore, and I'm starting to learn how to enjoy all of the things in life that are still beautiful. We are broken, my friend, and we will always be broken. But broken men can still live, can still be fathers and husbands, and can still find a bit of joy once our hearts are ready to look for it. |
7,522 | daddit | You're living our worst nightmare OP. I would not be strong enough to go through what you're going through. My friends killed themselves around the same age, and I'll never forget how it affected the parents. I'm sorry for your loss. |
7,523 | daddit | I'm so sorry for your loss. Please take the time to grieve and find therapy for yourself and your family. |
7,524 | daddit | I'm so sorry. I can't imagine your grief |
7,525 | daddit | I'm so sorry for your loss. Please consider this: We are only shepherds for our children. We can guide them and keep them safe while they are young. One day, they can roam without our care and we can only hope that they are safe without us watching. You will grieve and should greive. You can't go through this without pain. But bring in family and friends to support you. Don't go it alone. Seek therapy when you can. Certain counselling is not available until later on, but seeking it now will help you plan for the future. Seek it for your other kids, too. The loss and pain will not go away, but you will learn to be better at living with it and it will change. For now, take care of yourself and yours. I'm crying with you. |
7,526 | daddit | Sorry for your loss man but you need to be stronger now than ever for your family, make sure they're okay and open to talking about things. And make sure your firearms are locked up and teach your family gun saftey and to respect firearms. |
7,527 | daddit | There are no answers at the bottom of a bottle. If you drink, now is the right time to get sober. This won’t go away. After my cousin of 19 wrapped his car around a telephone pole driving to work in the morning, my uncle spent the next ten years drinking his liver into cirrhosis and then death. He was 51. I loved him dearly. A friend of mine lost his 20 year old son at college and he quit drinking then. He’s been sober almost three years now and became heavily involved in trail running and cycling. He’s going to AA and has a ton of support from the community. He was 18 when his son was born and never went to college either, just worked. I’m sorry for your loss and I hope you and yours can find the help you need. |
7,528 | daddit | No words for that. Just know that I'd like to steal some of your pain today... Stay strong. You are not alone |
7,529 | daddit | I’m so very sorry for your loss. |
7,530 | daddit | Hey mate, all I can offer is my deepest condolences, I'm so sorry for you and your family. Stay strong for your other 2. Utterly heartbreaking. |
7,531 | daddit | Sorry for your loss my dude. This is a tragedy no one should ever have to live through. Get therapy for yourself (yes you) and your family ASAP and find meaning in the short term by being the rock for the rest of your family. They need you now more than ever. |
7,532 | daddit | That’s more than a dad should ever live through. I am so sorry my friend. |
7,533 | daddit | No words are adequate. You have the support of everyone here. If you need to talk, feel free to DM me any time. |
7,534 | daddit | Just another voice to say how sorry I am. We are a community and we are thinking of you. A loss for one is a loss for all. Still there are no words; you are still a dad to your entire family who will need you so badly in the coming days and weeks, do the best you can and try to have as much help as you can afford. |
7,535 | daddit | OMG, dude. I am so sorry. This is just awful. I have no real words of advice. YOu might try calling 988. Yes, that's a suicide help line but maybe their counselors have some insight in how to pass the bad news to younger siblings. OMG. I'm in tears just thinking about this. |
7,536 | daddit | I’ve struggled since you posted whether or not to say this. The last thing I want to do is add to your pain. But as someone who struggled with undiagnosed depression for the first thirty years of my life, I need you to know that there’s nothing you could have done. Depression is a brutal, ugly, unforgiving disease, but it’s also one that bestows on the sufferer an uncanny ability to successfully hide it from everyone around them. You can protect a loved one from external forces but not their own brain chemistry. I feel for you and I’m so sorry. |
7,537 | daddit | I'm thinking of you man. |
7,538 | daddit | I am sorry for your loss. I will keep your family in my prayers. You might want to look into therapy for your and your sons to help process this. DM me if you need to talk. |
7,539 | daddit | My condolences my friend. This is the worst thing that can happen to anyone in their lifetime. I am sorry you are going through it. |
7,540 | daddit | I’m sorry man. I can’t and don’t want to imagine. |
7,541 | daddit | I am sorry for your loss. I would recommend contacting a therapist or support group that focuses on parents losing their child. In all likelihood, she was struggling with some major mental health issues that she either hid or was not willing to discuss for one reason or another. You can do everything right as a parent and still something like this can happen. Just know that you are not alone on this and I hope you find comfort in this tragedy. |
7,542 | daddit | Oh my dude, I'm so so sorry. My heart breaks for you. I can't offer much other than that I'm in NZ. So (assuming you're in US) if you need to talk in the middle of the night, sling me a message and I'll do my best to be there. |
7,543 | daddit | This stopped me in my tracks this morning. I'd give you the biggest hug in the world if I could, man. I have no advice other than the keep time in mind. Time will help. It won't heal, but it will help. Please keep that in mind as you're going through all this and trying different coping mechanisms. They may help. They may not. But time will happen and time will help. |
7,544 | daddit | I’m not sure if this is what you want to hear but I’ll say it anyways. I’ve been on the other side of this, I attempted to OD on Anti-Depressants and Xanax in 2017, and thankfully (and obviously) was unsuccessful. I say that for this, you can not blame yourself for this. My parents have always been great and I couldn’t have ever asked for more from them. There’s not a single thing my mom or dad could’ve done to help the way I felt. You. Are. Not. To. Blame. Period. Sending love your way, you have a lot to live for and a lot left to accomplish. |
7,545 | daddit | I lost a kid… but not that way. This helped: https://www.compassionatefriends.org/ Good luck. All I can say is remember that if she were alive, she’d want you to take care of the rest of your family and yourself, and that’s the only thing you can do for her at this point. also, hate to tell you this, but in my experience, after the original out-pour of overwhelming support from everyone you know, they'll all disappear. it'll be a mix of not knowing how to talk to you, or shying away because you threaten their bubble world where things like this don't happen, or something else, but then you'll be really alone. |
7,546 | daddit | I’m a two-time suicide attempt survivor and father of two daughters, OP. If that unique overlap of life experience will bring you any valuable insights or if it will allow you to alleviate any (of what I think is inevitable) guilt, then please consider me a resource and one of the seemingly countless pairs of ears willing to listen to your pain. It’s also worth noting that I’ve founded a mental health nonprofit and earn my living doing graphic design for a suicide prevention nonprofit. I only mention this because these positions give me access to a wealth of resources beyond the obvious like 988 or Crisis Text Line. The “would have / should have / could have” downward spiral is deep, dark, and very easy to slip down. My teenage depression and suicidal thoughts followed me into parenthood so I’m in a very strange position where I empathize with both you and your daughter. IT’S. NOT. YOUR. FAULT. When I was 16 and suicidal, I thought I was doing my family and friends a favor by taking my life. That’s how dramatically mental illnesses like depression can distort reality. Not to mention the pain. And no one has ever described that pain better than David Foster Wallace, who tragically took his own life at the age of 46. “The so-called ‘psychotically depressed’ person who tries to kill herself doesn’t do so out of quote ‘hopelessness’ or any abstract conviction that life’s assets and debits do not square. And surely not because death seems suddenly appealing. The person in whom its invisible agony reaches a certain unendurable level will kill herself the same way a trapped person will eventually jump from the window of a burning high-rise. Make no mistake about people who leap from burning windows. Their terror of falling from a great height is still just as great as it would be for you or me standing speculatively at the same window just checking out the view; i.e. the fear of falling remains a constant. The variable here is the other terror, the fire’s flames: when the flames get close enough, falling to death becomes the slightly less terrible of two terrors. It’s not desiring the fall; it’s terror of the flames. And yet nobody down on the sidewalk, looking up and yelling ‘Don’t!’ and ‘Hang on!’, can understand the jump. Not really. You’d have to have personally been trapped and felt flames to really understand a terror way beyond falling.” — David Foster Wallace |
7,547 | daddit | It’s 2:46am PST and this hurts my heart to hear this tragic news in real time. If you were local I’d give you a papa hug. I have eyes like a snake but hearing your pain and broken spirit has me tearing up. I’ll keep you and your family in my prayers. Let me know if there is anything I can do even if your in a different time zone. |
7,548 | daddit | It doesn't feel like enough, but I'm thinking of you tonight. And I'm going to go kiss.my.kids right now. Anything I say feels odd but I'm sorry it happened to you and stay strong. |
7,549 | daddit | She is gone, but you aren't. The other guy said it, but it's worth repeating. /u/USER There is going to be lots of time where you're going to be asking questions that there aren't answers to. This is going to take time. Anger, denial, confusion, sadness. These are all normal parts of the grieving process. (Not an exhaustive list) OP, the two young sons are going to need their dad doing what you can for them will also help keep your mind off of your own pain without you exiting mentally or emotionally. This will allow your subconscious to process information even if you aren't crying through the pain. Take it slow, make time for yourself to feel your emotions, and don't bury them. I, as will many others, be praying for you. I'd also ask that if you feel like you have no one to talk to, please come talk to us. Talk to someone. It's imperative. Talk therapy, whether with a licensed person or just strangers on the internet, is so very helpful. Share good stories, share bad stories, share updates, share. That sharing will help to offload some of the emotional weight you will for sure be caring. |
7,550 | daddit | I'm sorry for your loss... |
7,551 | daddit | I'm so sorry. Like others have said seek therapy for yourself and your 2 boys. There may be support groups in your area that can also be of help. |
7,552 | daddit | Just sending a big virtual hug. Talk with people. Don't hold this in. Shared grief is grief divided. |
7,553 | daddit | There’s no way I can know the depths of your situation but I understand it. Our 7yo occasionally speaks of “I wish I was dead” or “I want to kill myself” and it cuts so hard. I don’t know how I would process that situation, no idea. I’m so sorry this happened OP, I know it feels that “everyone’s else’s lives just go on normally” while yours is upended, but know that at least some of us grieve with you in this. Hugs |
7,554 | daddit | And I’m balling in my kitchen as a single father of three, including an 11 year old girl. I’m so sorry brother. Words cannot convey how truly sorry I am. Just know it’s not your fault. |
7,555 | daddit | Hey bud, I lost my daughter a few years ago and had to keep myself together for her twin brother and their mother. Different circumstances, but I've learned that while anyone's compassion and support is uplifting in their own ways, this is something I can only fully explore with others who've lost a child. DM me and I'll pass you my contact, if you think having an ear would be helpful. Lean on anyone willing to hold you. (Between everyone offering, you won't overwhelm any one of us). You're likely going to loop around in the shock for a while spiraling down into this particular hellscape. The world will be full emotional landmines that will trigger you in ways that aren't always paralyzing, but unsettling and exhausting nonetheless. You will cycle erratically through a full spectrum of emotions in dimensions only the birth of your children can compare to. Be sure to carve out some time and space for yourself to just break down, ugly cry, and scream your lungs out. Seek out support networks dedicated to grieving parents. Read books in the genre. ("The Mama Sutras" and "Bearing the Unbearable" are two that come to mind.) Your other children need you to do that kind of internal work to stay present and guide them through it. But upfront with them. They will understand, even if not yet. It's a reality that will never change; but you *will* learn to carry it if you nurture your grief. Much love and best of luck to you. |
7,556 | daddit | I keep coming back and reading the comments and am humbled into tears from this outpouring of support. I'm not used to this. You guys really are "circling the wagons" and I never knew I had that. To feel like I do is overwhelming. Thank you all, really. Thank you. |
7,557 | daddit | [deleted] |
7,558 | daddit | I'm so sorry for your loss. |
7,559 | daddit | I am so sorry for the loss of your baby girl. Sending you all the love. |
7,560 | daddit | Hugs. |
7,561 | daddit | I am so very very sorry that this has happened and wish you all the love in the world... |
7,562 | daddit | So sorry for your loss. It's a pain we can't comprehend but all fear. I hope that you and your family find a way through and make peace someday. |
7,563 | daddit | I am so sorry for your loss. |
7,564 | daddit | My god, I’m so sorry. You and your family are in my thoughts. |
7,565 | daddit | Here for ya, brother |
7,566 | daddit | You failed nothing. You can't control everything. This is horrifying anyway, I hope you and your family will be strong. |
7,567 | daddit | Be strong. I love you, man. |
7,568 | daddit | Sending my love |
7,569 | daddit | I’m so sorry. I’m so sorry. |
7,570 | daddit | Big hugs, dude. I’m so sorry. |
7,571 | daddit | I'm so sorry |
7,572 | daddit | I'm so sorry |
7,573 | daddit | My thoughts are with you and your family. |
7,574 | daddit | When you are ready, it may be helpful to find a place like this that specializes in grieving for the whole family. https://www.elesplace.org/ |
7,575 | daddit | Don't know of this been said, but don't hide your emotions for your other kids. You are hurt and that isn't something you should have to put away. It will break you and it will break them in the long run. Hope you find some awnsers, hope you'll find a place where things make more sense. My condolences |
7,576 | daddit | There are no adequate words for this, I’m so sorry. Dad to Dad, man to man, bro to bro. Whatever you need, DM. I — and we — got your back. |
7,577 | daddit | u/speaksoftly_bigstick I am so so sorry for your lose. Please know that the casual web for suicide is vast and there is never one single thing that ultimately drives someone to this point. I run an organization that delivers suicide treatment care at scale and requested resources from our co-founders who have a combined 60 years of research and treatment in the area of suicidology. Here are some resources they recommended along with their deep condolences to you and your family. Resources: https://afsp.org/find-a-support-group/ [https://afsp.org/ive-lost-someone](https://afsp.org/ive-lost-someone) Books: The first book listed was also recommended by Dr. David Jobes https://afsp.org/books-for-loss-survivors There is no right way to heal from this loss. This last resource though has a lot of helpful information you may need right now: how to talk to kids, how to tell other people, dealing with the police, etc. https://afsp.org/practical-information-for-immediately-after-a-loss https://www.health.harvard.edu/mind-and-mood/left-behind-after-suicide |
7,578 | daddit | This might not be a time you want to sit and listen to a podcast, but this story might provide some insight on talking with your boys… https://open.spotify.com/episode/4ObhPZdfvyt0KKaaLPdwAW?si=tdm21gPwSYa3LIKrsHFBFQ Its about The Sharing Place where kids who have to deal with significant loss and trauma go to try and heal. It is heavy on kids dealing with suicide and might just give a little insight on words/phrases that could be used… The episode is titled the Sharing Place, published July 15 with Heavyweight (the podcast series) and the story was originally published prior on This American Life. I am sorry for your loss. I am in my classroom crying, imagining the pain you are going through and imagining the feelings your daughter must have been holding onto. I wish i could give you a hug. I will be hugging my kids as soon as i get home tonight! |
7,579 | daddit | I’m not dad(21M), but I have attempted before when I was younger. My parents loved me more than I felt that I deserved, and even now I struggle to understand why. OP, you have to know that this was not your fault. What happened was not in your control and it is not your fault that your daughter was sick. You have to know that you did not fail her as a father, not even for a second. Your daughter would want you to know that she knows you loved her. That she knows that you will always love her, and that all the times you got mad at her, or the two of you argued, she knows that it was because of your love that you did. She would want you to know that all the times you didn’t let her do things she wanted to, from the candy she wasn’t allowed to have as a baby, to the party she wanted to go to and wasn’t allowed, she forgives you for that. It’s water under the bridge. She would want you to know that she loves you. That even though she lost the fight against the monsters, you and your family were one of the reasons that kept her going. She was in pain, and while it was too much, you played a part in making it that much more bearable. I’m really, truly sorry for your loss OP. Words will never be able to describe what you’re going through, and I won’t pretend to know. But please, take the time to take care of yourself. Make sure you eat, and rest, and however hard, please let yourself grieve. If you can’t do it for yourself, do it for her. Love and hugs, a kid who has a dad |
7,580 | daddit | I don’t have words, but I’ll share a quote from Wendell Berry that helped me once: “I began to know my story then. Like everybody's, it was going to be the story of living in the absence of the dead. What is the thread that holds it all together? Grief, I thought for a while. And grief is there sure enough, just about all the way through. From the time I was a girl I have never been far from it. But grief is not a force and has no power to hold. You only bear it. **Love is what carries you, for it is always there, even in the dark, or most in the dark, but shining out at times like gold stitches in a piece of embroidery.**” |
7,581 | daddit | I just want to say this: It’s not your fault. You’re a good dad. |
7,582 | daddit | As a father of 2 beautiful little girls, I didn't even finish reading that and my eyes were full of tears. I can't even begin to imagine :( if you need to talk pls do, I'd be more then happy.... I am so sorry. |
7,583 | daddit | reading this was a punch in the gut. I'm so sorry, man. No parent should have to go through this. I don't have anything poignant to say except that I hope you can stay strong for your other kids. Is there a way members of this sub can send you a couple of pizzas so at least you don't have to worry about feeding your boys in the meantime? |
7,584 | daddit | I have a little girl who just turned 1.5 years last month and this post made me cry. OP, like all the other dads who have commented or reached out, please please DM me if you need to talk. |
7,585 | daddit | Please ask for help. With meals. With laundry. With yard work. With childcare. Everything. People will be there for you. They want to help. And then please ask for help with mental health. Find a therapist and a group. Daddit is here for you for sure but you will need more than us. |
7,586 | daddit | Crap, my girl is only 4 and I’m already terrified about her being without me when she goes to school. School is a much tougher place now than when I was a kid. I think I might show her the picture of your daughter and tell her no matter how bad things get or how impossible the problem seems, she is surrounded by family that love her and would do anything for her to help. School people are all so *meaningless*. |
7,587 | daddit | Condolences and prayers from my wife and I. |
7,588 | daddit | What a beautiful girl. Now is the time to grieve. My heart is broken. |
7,589 | daddit | Man, I get on here to complain about my kid not sleeping. Holy shit. I'm so sorry, op. I hope you and your family can get the help and support you all need. Please, please continue to reach out if it helps. Giving you big hugs through the internet. |
7,590 | daddit | I know a lot of people have already reached out but as a dad of a young daughter and also having dealt with a suicide from someone close to me I may be able to provide some help. But just reach out I'd you need anything or wanna talk just like everyone else here. We are a tribe here at daddit and we all got you now. I will say things like this will never be easy to deal with but in time you will develop the strength you need to carry on for you and your family but for now it's ok to not be ok and it's ok to let people know that you need that help. Lastly I know it's been said but please get the professional help you need. |
7,591 | daddit | I’m so sorry. You didn’t fail her. The universe did, perhaps. But you loved her and cared for her and gave up your early adulthood for her and did the hardest and most thankless job ever. Live for your children, even if you can’t live for yourself right now. I’m sorry. Love may be hard to feel right now, so have some of mine. Some of every member of Daddit. We’re all in this life together. |
7,592 | daddit | We're all holding back tears (or not holding them back) reading and responding to you brother. So sorry for what you are going through. Stay strong for your boys. Much love coming your way... |
7,593 | daddit | I can't imagine what you're going through. I am so, so very sorry for your loss. My kids are my world, just as it sounds like she was for you. Your boys need you, and part of what they'll need now is for you to show them what grief looks like. I know it's got to be terrible, but don't try to hide your pain from your boys, they'll see it, they'll know and then they'll try to hide their pain too. Honor her memory and her loss, show your boys what she means to you and let them show you what she means to them. The pain you're feeling is not something I can't even imagine. You hold your boys tight, and you tell them. Tell them you love her still, and that it's ok not to understand why things happen. Tell them their emotions are completely fair, even if they're angry, or scared, or lost, and then you tell yourself the same. I hope that, in time, her memory can be a Blessing for you. |
7,594 | daddit | This is one of my biggest fears as a parent, especially after having thoughts like that when I was younger. There’s nothing anyone can say but I’m truly sorry for your loss, I hope you can eventually find peace with what has happened |
7,595 | daddit | We’re here for you. May you and your family find some peace in God and the belief that you will be reunited with your baby girl in His kingdom. |
7,596 | daddit | I’m so sorry for you OP. I understand this may sound blunt, but you should get rid of your guns. |
7,597 | daddit | sorry for your loss my man. i’m a nobody from a country far away from you but do drop me a message if you need someone to talk to. much love |
7,598 | daddit | I'm gonna go sit in with my girl while she sleeps. I hope you find a way to be ok. Take care. |
7,599 | daddit | I’m very sorry for your loss. |
7,600 | daddit | So Sorry for your loss … |
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