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Hey, I'm missing the party!
No! It can't be!
I TOLD you not to make that deal, Saddam!
Who gives a fuck?! I was just fucking with him!
No, Saddam. You made a deal. You can't just renege on a deal. That's lying.
Relax bitch! You're better seen, not hear okay?
Help you? You've destroyed my life and now you want me to help you?! You're always making me feel like a piece of shit.
Come on guy, you know I only rib you because I love you so much!
If you love somebody then you treat them with respect! You've never respected me!
Can we talk about this later? Everyone is watching!
I don't care! I want to talk about it now!
Ow, you're hurting me!
Listen guy, you're embarassing me in front of my friends! You know how I get mad when I get embarassed.
Now do what I say and keep your fucking mouth shut!
THAT'S IT! I HAVE HAD ENOUGH!!!!
What?! Why would you call me a pigfucker?!
Well, let's see... First of all, you fuck pigs.
Oh yeah!
Well, fuck my ass and call me a bitch, I just got a letter!
A letter from who, you shit sucking cock master?
It's from your mother.
My mother sent YOU a letter? What's it say?
It says 'Dear Terrance, please don't ever tell my son that I licked your hairy balls.'
You'd fuck your uncle!
YOU'D fuck your uncle!
<b>Shut your fucking face, Unclefucka!! You're an asslicking, Ball sucking Unclefucka!! You're an Unclefucka, yes it's true Nobody fucks Uncles quite like you</b>
<b>SHUT YOUR FUCKING FACE!! UNCLEFUCKA!!! YOU'RE the one that fucked your Uncle, UNCLEFUCKA!!! You don't eat, or sleep or mow the lawn You just fuck your Uncle all day long!</b>
Well, Terrance I hope you learned something from this whole experience.
I did, Terrance, I learned that you are a boner biting dick fart fuck face!
Say Phillip, want to see the Northern Lights?
You bet, Terrance!
HA HA HA! You burned yourself to death by lighting the fart! HA HA HA!!
I sure did, Phillip!!
Hello, Conan!
Hello, Brooke Shields!
Good one, Phillip! Cheers.
Cheers, Terrance!
Phillip, we've been tricked and ambushed by The Conan O'Brian Show!!
This little scrotum sucker willfully deceived us! You are a bad man!
And you call yourself a Canadian! I told you we should of done Leno!
Fight the power!
The young boy that died lit himself on fire. It was unfortunate, but how can they blame US?
Don't believe the hype!!
The problem is you don't allow your children to think for themselves. You try to raise them in a protective bubble, and then when they finally get old enough, they realize they've been lied to, and they resent you for it.
Yeah, God, no wonder your country is so fucked up.
Oh, you are such a maroon!
You would know, dummy.
Oh, Phillip. This cannot be good.
I know, Terrance. This is quite the shitstorm we've found ourselves in this time.
Phillip, this is worse than that trip to Quebec City when I fell asleep in that disco.
I know, Terrance. I know.
What's going on Terrance?
Canada is saving us!!
Did you hear that, Terrance? I farted!
You did? Just now?
AGH!
Terrance! NO!
You're quite a purveyor of filth, little boy!
Indeedy, that was a delicious choice of words!
Uh, we're just, starting our program...
This is NOT a place for fun and games! This is rehabilitation! Now GET TO IT!! We at MAC have a trial to go to!
How is the children's progress?
Very encouraging. Most of the children have been weened from their naughty mouths.
What do you mean MOST, why not ALL?
Well, some of the children just don't respond to 12 step programs.
Then we'll have to resort to plan B and call the vchip organization.
Mrs. Brovlofski, the Vchip hasn't been fully tested yet, it could be dangerous.
I don't care if it's dangerous! Desperate times call for desperate measures, Mr. Mackey. Perhaps I need to remind you of your situation.
Alright, I'll make the call...
What did my son say, Principal Victoria? Did he say the S word?
No, it was worse than that...
The F word?!
No, worse. Here's a short list of the things they've been saying.
Terrance and Phillip MOVIE?! Oy gevalt! Not again!
What is Terrance and Phillip?
Terrance and Phillip are two VERY untalented, unfunny actors from Canada. Their TV show is filled with toilet humor and bad language and is just complete garbage. Now it appears they have a movie and I'm positive it's not suitable for children!
Well, it looks like I'll have to send a warning letter out to parents. I have to put a stop to this before MORE children see 'Terrance and Phillip'.
We must take action on this immediately.
Ooh yes. I think we'll have to give detention to those boys.
Forgive me for saying so, Principal Victoria, but your methods are too... Shall we say... soft? As head of the PTA, I am exercising my right under article 42 of the PTA code.
Article 42! You don't mean?!
Yes Principal Victoria. The PTA is impeaching you.
But I
You are officially relieved of your duties as principal of this school!
You're all part of Satan's army now!
What the hell is going on?!
I am the dark master!
Oh no you don't! This is MY fight!! I don't need your help, Alan Dershwitz!
SILENCE! I AM SATAN!
Oh.
YOU HAVE SPILLED THE BLOOD OF THE INNOCENTS. NOW THE WORLD BELONGS TO ME... NOW BEGINS TWO MILLION YEARS OF DARKNESS!! AND ALL THANKS TO YOU!!!
Yes... And in doing so, you brought enough anger and intolerance to the world to allow my coming.
And I thought my mother was the master of guilt. Geez Louise.
SILENCE!!! NOW!!! EVERYONE BOW DOWN TO ME!!!
Oh God... What have I done...
My fellow Americans. I have led this fight in the War against profanity. I have founded Mothers Against Canada. Our neighbor to the north has abused us for the last time.
As Commander in chief, I have ordered our Army to set up defensive positions along the USCanada border in anticipation of an attack.
What about air strikes?
Huh?
We have to have air strikes on their military and entertainment centers. It's the only way to ensure that their smut can't reach American soil!