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Chapter Think Peacefully
concepts to reconceptualize your world will weaken the influence of fear and grief and
hardwire your brain for peace
Meditate to Calm the Mind
Would you have a great empire Rule over yourself Publilius Syrus BCE BCE
The next few sections discuss meditation and meditative techniques you can use to ease your
mind and body Meditation is an internal effort to selfregulate the mind During meditation
sessions participants sustain attention toward breathing bodily sensations emotions and
thoughts When they find their attention has wandered into phobias and compulsions they are
supposed to acknowledge this and then let go of them to refocus on the breath or empty the
mind Calm inaction and desireless patience result in the domestication of the brains
barbarian emotional systems Repeated failures in the first several sessions are lessons in
humility and patience Adopting a consistent meditative practice will lead you to develop
selfmastery of thoughtthe most real and lasting power
Illustration A Meditator B Rabid dog C Blood sucking leech D Smoke detector
Siddhartha Gautama also known as the Buddha spent six years meditating on his suffering
in an attempt to understand peace He finally concluded that suffering is not caused by either
misfortune or divine punishment but rather by thought patterns This led him to teach others
that suffering derives from craving and dissatisfaction and that the only way to stop suffering is
to stop wanting more and to stop wanting to impress others Complete control of the mind is
known in Buddhism and Hinduism as nirvana The literal translation of nirvana is extinguishing
the fire the fire of worry yearning and longing Nirvana is also defined as serenity salvation
heaven or an indestructible sense of wellbeing in which ego hatred and greed have been
overcome Many spiritual masters think of nirvana and true enlightenment to be the end of
emotional suffering believe it is attainable for everyone
PROGRAM PEACE Self Care Exercises to Reprogram Your Mind and Body
Meditate by Watching the Thinker
There is nothing either good or bad but thinking makes it so Shakespeare
f you dont like something change it If you cant change it change your attitude Maya Angelou
We feel like we control our stream of thought but we dont Most of our thinking is directed by
reflexlike impulses beyond our supervision Trying to control the parade of associations is
much like trying to control a dream Our desires and discouragements are endless because they
dont stem from our objective reality but the state of our default network We ruminate about
negative circumstances in a pitiful and inefficacious attempt to change individual thoughts
about them for the better but instead we must change our overall thinking pattern To start
this process observe your thoughts as if you were an outsider
Thinking Activity Watching the Thinker
Spend five minutes seeing thoughts as what they are opinions Identify negative
considerations as worries and let them go without elaborating on them Ask yourself
wonder why had that last thought Then ask yourself Il wonder where my thought
will turn to next Never be afraid of what your next thought will be and rest secure in
the assumption that it will not have the power to cut short your next long deep
smooth inhalation
Dwelling on problems without a constructive intention to amend them is selfpunishment
Recognize that rumination about your perceived station in the status hierarchy may feel like
an objective observation but that is usually a distortion of reality Question the legitimacy of
your irrational and selfcritical thoughts Dont take them seriously Smile at the voice in your
head as you would at the antics of a child Disidentify with it
In life bad things are inevitable Just dont absorb them Dont hold them in your face
stomach or heart Let the pain pass right through you Just because it would upset others or
would have upset you in the past doesnt mean you should let it upset you now Ask yourself
Do hold my amygdalas panic button out for the world to press Ask yourself honestly
whether you want to be a victim of your lifes events or a prisoner in your mind If you think
that weeping or throwing a tantrum over misfortune is ineffectual realize that internal
suffering is too
When someone honks at us our heart rate rises After an argument we have a headache
When we are mistreated we cant sleep When someone challenges us our jaw contracts and
our stomach churns What do all these things have in common Mental perseveration We cant
stop thinking about unpleasant encounters By continuing to mull over these incidents you
maintain the tension But if you bar yourself from searching for justifications to launch a
counterattack you can return to homeostasis in seconds
Our struggle with peer politics is Kafkaesque in the sense that it is at once mundane
senseless inescapable and unresolvable We keep struggling with the ramifications of the
pecking order even though finding some semblance of control of it is impossible There is no
Chapter Think Peacefully
solace or understanding to be reached in perseverating on it Just because they say it doesnt
mean its true Not responding is not a loss Getting the last word is meaningless Thinking
about just how wrong what that person did is will not change anything
When you find yourself engaged in negative thinking imagine yourself dropping it like it
is a scalding item that you dont want to be burned by or placing it on the ground like a
heavy box of rotten food Either way walk away from it like the unnecessary burden that it is
Pain isnt optional but holding on to pain is When you simulate negative scenarios in your
mind your brain and body operate as if what you are imagining is really occurring You tense up
and carry the fight around with you But if you can think of taking such misfortunes
philosophically without suffering you can protect your chakralike modules from
unnecessary strain
Meditate Mindfully
Who sees all beings in his own self and his own self in all beings loses fear When a sage sees this great unity
and his self has become all things what delusion and what sorrow can ever be near him Upanishads
Breathe Let go And remind yourself that this very moment is the only one you know you have for sure
Oprah Winfrey
Mindfulness is a meditative practice that has grown out of the Buddhist tradition A person who
is meditating mindfully attempts to become aware of their surroundings thoughts and actions
without being critical For beginners to achieve a state of mindfulness they must concentrate
on ruling out all distractions and focus on being present in their current experience Someone
familiar with this practice can remain in a state of mindfulness throughout most daily activities
think of all the activities and exercises in this book as meditative practices that are best done
mindfully
Medical researcher and author Jon KabatZinn helped popularize the modern mindfulness
movement KabatZinn has influenced many medical treatment centers around the world to
use mindfulness meditation to help their patients counteract psychological stress pain and
illness He conceptualizes mindfulness as a state in which one is aware of and focused on the
reality of the present moment accepting and acknowledging it without being frustrated by
thoughts about or emotional reactions to it One of the key elements involved in achieving
mindfulness is to reside in the now in choiceless awareness Nonjudgment nonresistance
and nonattachment are fundamental to living mindfully
Thinking Activity Living in the Present Moment
Spend a few minutes immersed in the here and now simply experiencing your senses
Allow yourself to live entirely in the moment as if you have chosen it and everything about it
Notice when you find yourself worrying about the future or regretting the past When your