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What makes a good marriage?What makes a healthy marriage last? | "In my mind, a healthy marriage has two participants, meaning both people participate equally in the intimate connection of marriage. An unequal participation comes in many forms, such as one person checking out of conversations when it becomes emotional, or speaking over and for each other in these conversations. Coup... | "This answer varies based on you relationship. However, I do believe their are some basic fundamental areas that are beneficial for a healthy marriage:1.) Effective Communication2.) Trust3.) Love/Passion4.) Loyalty.\'a05.) Unconditional Positive Regard.\'a0Everyone has their favorite qualities they feel best fit a marr... |
What makes a good marriage?What makes a healthy marriage last? | "I appreciate your question.The answer of what makes a ""good marriage"" are as varied as there are marriages.Basically, similarity, like mindedness in beliefs and values, makes a good marriage.\'a0The best chance of getting along with someone on a longterm basis is when two people see life and the world in similar way... | "This answer varies based on you relationship. However, I do believe their are some basic fundamental areas that are beneficial for a healthy marriage:1.) Effective Communication2.) Trust3.) Love/Passion4.) Loyalty.\'a05.) Unconditional Positive Regard.\'a0Everyone has their favorite qualities they feel best fit a marr... |
How do I get my husband to listen to me?"I'm always listening to my husband but it feels like he never listens to me. How do I get my husband to listen to me instead of me listening to him all the time?" | "It's hard when you feel as if you're the only one that's taking the time to listen to your spouse. But, I would look at this as an opportunity to see if you can become aware of what exactly is happening between you, when you try and talk with your husband.\'a0Sometimes, it can be in the way dialogue is approached. I w... | "Thanks for reaching out. This is a great question. Communication is definitely a 2-way street. One person cannot participate in a discussion. It takes a talker and a listener. Furthermore, communication will breakdown if each party is only focusing on his or her agenda and is not open to what the other person is sayin... |
How do I get my husband to listen to me?"I'm always listening to my husband but it feels like he never listens to me. How do I get my husband to listen to me instead of me listening to him all the time?" | "Does your husband want to listen to you?Find this out by asking him the question!This way you know whether the goal you'd like to reach is even possible.Some partners prefer that one person is the rule maker or the only one who is entitled to talk about themselves.If your husband tells you he wants to listen to you, o... | "Thanks for reaching out. This is a great question. Communication is definitely a 2-way street. One person cannot participate in a discussion. It takes a talker and a listener. Furthermore, communication will breakdown if each party is only focusing on his or her agenda and is not open to what the other person is sayin... |
How do I get my husband to listen to me?"I'm always listening to my husband but it feels like he never listens to me. How do I get my husband to listen to me instead of me listening to him all the time?" | "Unfortunately you can't directly change another person's behavior. However, you can give him feedback on how his not listening impacts you. The best way to provide feedback is in 3 parts. The first part is telling him the emotion you are experiencing when he doesn't listen, such as hurt, sad, and unloved. I would stay... | "Thanks for reaching out. This is a great question. Communication is definitely a 2-way street. One person cannot participate in a discussion. It takes a talker and a listener. Furthermore, communication will breakdown if each party is only focusing on his or her agenda and is not open to what the other person is sayin... |
How do I get my husband to listen to me?"I'm always listening to my husband but it feels like he never listens to me. How do I get my husband to listen to me instead of me listening to him all the time?" | "Thanks for reaching out. This is a great question. Communication is definitely a 2-way street. One person cannot participate in a discussion. It takes a talker and a listener. Furthermore, communication will breakdown if each party is only focusing on his or her agenda and is not open to what the other person is sayin... | "Thanks for writing. There are many different house of things that may be helpful here. I can give you some general ideas, but if some of these things don't get you to where you would like to go, consider seeing a therapist who specializes in couples:Remember that you can only guarantee change in yourself. You can ask ... |
How do I get my husband to listen to me?"I'm always listening to my husband but it feels like he never listens to me. How do I get my husband to listen to me instead of me listening to him all the time?" | "Thanks for reaching out. This is a great question. Communication is definitely a 2-way street. One person cannot participate in a discussion. It takes a talker and a listener. Furthermore, communication will breakdown if each party is only focusing on his or her agenda and is not open to what the other person is sayin... | "Have the two of you ever discussed how you feel? \'a0I know given the nature of your question that's probably not likely, but I'm going to suggest it any way. \'a0He needs to understand that how you feel about this issue equates to not being as happy in the relationship as you could be or he thinks you are. \'a0So sta... |
How do I get my husband to listen to me?"I'm always listening to my husband but it feels like he never listens to me. How do I get my husband to listen to me instead of me listening to him all the time?" | "Does your husband want to listen to you?Find this out by asking him the question!This way you know whether the goal you'd like to reach is even possible.Some partners prefer that one person is the rule maker or the only one who is entitled to talk about themselves.If your husband tells you he wants to listen to you, o... | "It's hard when you feel as if you're the only one that's taking the time to listen to your spouse. But, I would look at this as an opportunity to see if you can become aware of what exactly is happening between you, when you try and talk with your husband.\'a0Sometimes, it can be in the way dialogue is approached. I w... |
How do I get my husband to listen to me?"I'm always listening to my husband but it feels like he never listens to me. How do I get my husband to listen to me instead of me listening to him all the time?" | "Unfortunately you can't directly change another person's behavior. However, you can give him feedback on how his not listening impacts you. The best way to provide feedback is in 3 parts. The first part is telling him the emotion you are experiencing when he doesn't listen, such as hurt, sad, and unloved. I would stay... | "It's hard when you feel as if you're the only one that's taking the time to listen to your spouse. But, I would look at this as an opportunity to see if you can become aware of what exactly is happening between you, when you try and talk with your husband.\'a0Sometimes, it can be in the way dialogue is approached. I w... |
How do I get my husband to listen to me?"I'm always listening to my husband but it feels like he never listens to me. How do I get my husband to listen to me instead of me listening to him all the time?" | "It's hard when you feel as if you're the only one that's taking the time to listen to your spouse. But, I would look at this as an opportunity to see if you can become aware of what exactly is happening between you, when you try and talk with your husband.\'a0Sometimes, it can be in the way dialogue is approached. I w... | "Thanks for writing. There are many different house of things that may be helpful here. I can give you some general ideas, but if some of these things don't get you to where you would like to go, consider seeing a therapist who specializes in couples:Remember that you can only guarantee change in yourself. You can ask ... |
How do I get my husband to listen to me?"I'm always listening to my husband but it feels like he never listens to me. How do I get my husband to listen to me instead of me listening to him all the time?" | "It's hard when you feel as if you're the only one that's taking the time to listen to your spouse. But, I would look at this as an opportunity to see if you can become aware of what exactly is happening between you, when you try and talk with your husband.\'a0Sometimes, it can be in the way dialogue is approached. I w... | "Have the two of you ever discussed how you feel? \'a0I know given the nature of your question that's probably not likely, but I'm going to suggest it any way. \'a0He needs to understand that how you feel about this issue equates to not being as happy in the relationship as you could be or he thinks you are. \'a0So sta... |
How do I get my husband to listen to me?"I'm always listening to my husband but it feels like he never listens to me. How do I get my husband to listen to me instead of me listening to him all the time?" | "Does your husband want to listen to you?Find this out by asking him the question!This way you know whether the goal you'd like to reach is even possible.Some partners prefer that one person is the rule maker or the only one who is entitled to talk about themselves.If your husband tells you he wants to listen to you, o... | "Unfortunately you can't directly change another person's behavior. However, you can give him feedback on how his not listening impacts you. The best way to provide feedback is in 3 parts. The first part is telling him the emotion you are experiencing when he doesn't listen, such as hurt, sad, and unloved. I would stay... |
How do I get my husband to listen to me?"I'm always listening to my husband but it feels like he never listens to me. How do I get my husband to listen to me instead of me listening to him all the time?" | "Does your husband want to listen to you?Find this out by asking him the question!This way you know whether the goal you'd like to reach is even possible.Some partners prefer that one person is the rule maker or the only one who is entitled to talk about themselves.If your husband tells you he wants to listen to you, o... | "Thanks for writing. There are many different house of things that may be helpful here. I can give you some general ideas, but if some of these things don't get you to where you would like to go, consider seeing a therapist who specializes in couples:Remember that you can only guarantee change in yourself. You can ask ... |
How do I get my husband to listen to me?"I'm always listening to my husband but it feels like he never listens to me. How do I get my husband to listen to me instead of me listening to him all the time?" | "Does your husband want to listen to you?Find this out by asking him the question!This way you know whether the goal you'd like to reach is even possible.Some partners prefer that one person is the rule maker or the only one who is entitled to talk about themselves.If your husband tells you he wants to listen to you, o... | "Have the two of you ever discussed how you feel? \'a0I know given the nature of your question that's probably not likely, but I'm going to suggest it any way. \'a0He needs to understand that how you feel about this issue equates to not being as happy in the relationship as you could be or he thinks you are. \'a0So sta... |
How do I get my husband to listen to me?"I'm always listening to my husband but it feels like he never listens to me. How do I get my husband to listen to me instead of me listening to him all the time?" | "Unfortunately you can't directly change another person's behavior. However, you can give him feedback on how his not listening impacts you. The best way to provide feedback is in 3 parts. The first part is telling him the emotion you are experiencing when he doesn't listen, such as hurt, sad, and unloved. I would stay... | "Thanks for writing. There are many different house of things that may be helpful here. I can give you some general ideas, but if some of these things don't get you to where you would like to go, consider seeing a therapist who specializes in couples:Remember that you can only guarantee change in yourself. You can ask ... |
How do I get my husband to listen to me?"I'm always listening to my husband but it feels like he never listens to me. How do I get my husband to listen to me instead of me listening to him all the time?" | "Unfortunately you can't directly change another person's behavior. However, you can give him feedback on how his not listening impacts you. The best way to provide feedback is in 3 parts. The first part is telling him the emotion you are experiencing when he doesn't listen, such as hurt, sad, and unloved. I would stay... | "Have the two of you ever discussed how you feel? \'a0I know given the nature of your question that's probably not likely, but I'm going to suggest it any way. \'a0He needs to understand that how you feel about this issue equates to not being as happy in the relationship as you could be or he thinks you are. \'a0So sta... |
How do I get my husband to listen to me?"I'm always listening to my husband but it feels like he never listens to me. How do I get my husband to listen to me instead of me listening to him all the time?" | "Have the two of you ever discussed how you feel? \'a0I know given the nature of your question that's probably not likely, but I'm going to suggest it any way. \'a0He needs to understand that how you feel about this issue equates to not being as happy in the relationship as you could be or he thinks you are. \'a0So sta... | "Thanks for writing. There are many different house of things that may be helpful here. I can give you some general ideas, but if some of these things don't get you to where you would like to go, consider seeing a therapist who specializes in couples:Remember that you can only guarantee change in yourself. You can ask ... |
About a year ago I found out my husband had cheated on me"Cheating is something unacceptable for me but because we have two daughters I decided not to break up the family. However now I am struggling to forget and forgive what happened. I feel like I cannot trust him. Without trust I cannot stay in this relationship. O... | "To begin, I'm sorry to hear about your situation. Like many of the professionals have stated, infidelity is a very difficult obstacle to move forward from. It's not impossible. While forgetting is probably the hardest part, forgiveness is something that can and will happen. There are things you can do to help yourself... | "It is completely understandable that you are struggling to forgive and forget this betrayal, and I'd like to echo the sentiment of Danielle Alvarez: infidelity takes time to heal from, so allow yourself to grieve and find the support you need. I'd highly suggest going to couples therapy and addressing all the issues t... |
About a year ago I found out my husband had cheated on me"Cheating is something unacceptable for me but because we have two daughters I decided not to break up the family. However now I am struggling to forget and forgive what happened. I feel like I cannot trust him. Without trust I cannot stay in this relationship. O... | "To begin, I'm sorry to hear about your situation. Like many of the professionals have stated, infidelity is a very difficult obstacle to move forward from. It's not impossible. While forgetting is probably the hardest part, forgiveness is something that can and will happen. There are things you can do to help yourself... | "Let's just start with acknowledging that trust is huge and betrayal hurts. You're entitled to your feelings; all of them and you need to know that your husband understands you. That said some ways are more effective at rebuilding and repairing relationships that others. I am a big fan of The Gottman Method for couples... |
About a year ago I found out my husband had cheated on me"Cheating is something unacceptable for me but because we have two daughters I decided not to break up the family. However now I am struggling to forget and forgive what happened. I feel like I cannot trust him. Without trust I cannot stay in this relationship. O... | "It is completely understandable that you are struggling to forgive and forget this betrayal, and I'd like to echo the sentiment of Danielle Alvarez: infidelity takes time to heal from, so allow yourself to grieve and find the support you need. I'd highly suggest going to couples therapy and addressing all the issues t... | "Let's just start with acknowledging that trust is huge and betrayal hurts. You're entitled to your feelings; all of them and you need to know that your husband understands you. That said some ways are more effective at rebuilding and repairing relationships that others. I am a big fan of The Gottman Method for couples... |
Why am I with my husband if he is mean?"I love him but he doesn\'t show me love. He talks badly about me to his friends." | "So many questions comes to mind when I read your words...Do you love yourself?\'a0 What do you LOVE about him?\'a0 What are you getting from this relationship that is good for you?\'a0 What are you lacking in yourself that you allow yourself to be treated this way?....I can go on..If you can answer these questions, ma... | "Hello, and thank you for your question. Loving someone who\
doesn\'92t respect or treat you well can be enormously difficult and painful. \
Many people who find themselves in an emotionally hurtful\
relationship say that it was wonderful when it first started, but that over\
time their partner\'92s behaviors changed a... |
My husband doesn't trust me"My husband doesn\'t trust me for some past we had. I know all marriages have their ups and downs but sometimes I feel I am getting tired of the same thing over and over: that I am messing around which I am not." | "The good news in the way you're feeling is recognizing that your husband's trust of your actions, makes a difference to you.The typical therapy formula for restoring trust between two people after some sort of betrayal, is for the one who has broken the trust, to earn it back.Restoring trust requires both persons to a... | "It is incredibly frustrating to not be trusted when you know you are doing nothing wrong. If the lack of trust on your husband's end has to do with something you did in the past, then be patient and give it time. Once trust is broken it takes time and effort to gain it back. Try seeing the situation from your husband'... |
My husband doesn't trust me"My husband doesn\'t trust me for some past we had. I know all marriages have their ups and downs but sometimes I feel I am getting tired of the same thing over and over: that I am messing around which I am not." | "The good news in the way you're feeling is recognizing that your husband's trust of your actions, makes a difference to you.The typical therapy formula for restoring trust between two people after some sort of betrayal, is for the one who has broken the trust, to earn it back.Restoring trust requires both persons to a... | "Hi Louisiana,It's normal when trust has been broken in the past for fear and insecurities to come up from time to time. His reactions may not mean that he doesn't trust you, but rather that he gets scared that he's going to be hurt again.\'a0You're a bit vague about the past. You don't say whether you cheated or not. ... |
My husband doesn't trust me"My husband doesn\'t trust me for some past we had. I know all marriages have their ups and downs but sometimes I feel I am getting tired of the same thing over and over: that I am messing around which I am not." | "Hi Louisiana,It's normal when trust has been broken in the past for fear and insecurities to come up from time to time. His reactions may not mean that he doesn't trust you, but rather that he gets scared that he's going to be hurt again.\'a0You're a bit vague about the past. You don't say whether you cheated or not. ... | "It is incredibly frustrating to not be trusted when you know you are doing nothing wrong. If the lack of trust on your husband's end has to do with something you did in the past, then be patient and give it time. Once trust is broken it takes time and effort to gain it back. Try seeing the situation from your husband'... |
How do I see a therapist without having healthcare?I need to speak to someone about sexual addiction and binge eating immediately. | "Depending on your area and location, there may be therapists who provide services on a sliding scale. Additionally, churches will often times\'a0offer counseling for free or for a small fee. I suggest doing a simple Google search and contact therapists in your area. It never hurts to ask for a reduced fee and even if ... | "There are plenty of online providers within the mental health field that would me more than happy to speak with you immediately. \'a0Many of them provide treatment on a sliding scale fee. \'a0I would google online mental health treatment providers and that should lead you to a list of providers that can help you.", |
How do I handle my binge eating?"I have a problem with binge eating especially during times of stress. I binge eat and feel so overwhelmed with shame and disappointment that I end up going to the gym and trying to exercise the calories off. I am in my late s and I have been dealing with this since I was a teenager. Are... | "In dealing with an eating disorder you are far from alone. \'a0It is more common than you might think and tied to so many variables that it is easy for an individual to become overwhelmed in trying to navigate the influences of such variables. \'a0I have been working with individuals dealing with such challenges since... | "The fact that you are aware of the issue and what causes it is a step in the right direction.\'a0 You can absolutely break the cycle but it takes a lot of effort.\'a0 Much like growing a physical muscle, developing coping mechanisms must be practiced (exercised) in order to gain strength.\'a0 Find healthy activities t... |
How do I handle my binge eating?"I have a problem with binge eating especially during times of stress. I binge eat and feel so overwhelmed with shame and disappointment that I end up going to the gym and trying to exercise the calories off. I am in my late s and I have been dealing with this since I was a teenager. Are... | "In dealing with an eating disorder you are far from alone. \'a0It is more common than you might think and tied to so many variables that it is easy for an individual to become overwhelmed in trying to navigate the influences of such variables. \'a0I have been working with individuals dealing with such challenges since... | "I believe that for results that last, the best approach is to understand why someone feels like doing a certain behavior.""Coping mechanisms"" are superficial instruction that people usually give up on when feeling extreme pressure from the problem behaviors.Take the slower road of understanding why you would deprive ... |
How do I handle my binge eating?"I have a problem with binge eating especially during times of stress. I binge eat and feel so overwhelmed with shame and disappointment that I end up going to the gym and trying to exercise the calories off. I am in my late s and I have been dealing with this since I was a teenager. Are... | "The fact that you are aware of the issue and what causes it is a step in the right direction.\'a0 You can absolutely break the cycle but it takes a lot of effort.\'a0 Much like growing a physical muscle, developing coping mechanisms must be practiced (exercised) in order to gain strength.\'a0 Find healthy activities t... | "I believe that for results that last, the best approach is to understand why someone feels like doing a certain behavior.""Coping mechanisms"" are superficial instruction that people usually give up on when feeling extreme pressure from the problem behaviors.Take the slower road of understanding why you would deprive ... |
Why do I feel like I always need to be in a relationship?"I have suffered many things at home and school. We never went to the doctor to diagnose depression or anything like that but I always feel like a part of my heart is missing. I try to fill it in with objects or in this case a woman." | "There are a lot of ways to look at this. It sounds as if there is a part of you that is looking for support. I wonder what it is that you feel when you're not in a relationship?Because of the way you asked the question, I'm getting the impression that you are referring to romantic relationships. I wonder if you have c... | "There could be many reasons but often people feel validated when they are in a relationship, the need to be in a relationship can be related to a belief of unlovability which often stems from our childhood. The relationship sort of soothes this temporarily and the others interest or desire helps counteract the ingrain... |
My boyfriend is upset about my friendship with another guy"I have a friend that who I used to be in a relationship with. It was brief and turned into us being just good friends.\
I spent the weekend with him and it upset my boyfriend. Was i wrong?" | "The most important thing to ask yourself here is, ""how did this action affect my relationship, and is it worth the consequences?"" Regardless of your intentions in this action, your boyfriend is uncomfortable with this type of behavior. From here, we can objectively decide if spending time with your previous partner ... | "Depends on your definition of ""wrong"" on this one. Was it objectively wrong to spend the weekend with a good friend, who also happens to be an ex? Probably not. But, it upset your current boyfriend, and he is entitled to his feelings if you are in a relationship with him. He may be out of line if he assumes that any... |
My boyfriend is upset about my friendship with another guy"I have a friend that who I used to be in a relationship with. It was brief and turned into us being just good friends.\
I spent the weekend with him and it upset my boyfriend. Was i wrong?" | "The most important thing to ask yourself here is, ""how did this action affect my relationship, and is it worth the consequences?"" Regardless of your intentions in this action, your boyfriend is uncomfortable with this type of behavior. From here, we can objectively decide if spending time with your previous partner ... | "While you can't be responsible for your boyfriend's feelings, relationships do come with expectations. \'a0Both people in a relationship bring their own expectations into it. \'a0These expectations are usually unspoken, but result in conflict as you are experiencing here! \'a0Your boyfriend expects you not to spend th... |
My boyfriend is upset about my friendship with another guy"I have a friend that who I used to be in a relationship with. It was brief and turned into us being just good friends.\
I spent the weekend with him and it upset my boyfriend. Was i wrong?" | "The most important thing to ask yourself here is, ""how did this action affect my relationship, and is it worth the consequences?"" Regardless of your intentions in this action, your boyfriend is uncomfortable with this type of behavior. From here, we can objectively decide if spending time with your previous partner ... | "Hello. There are a number of factors playing into this situation. A former romantic partner coming back onto the scene during a current relationship; you spending alone time (and spending the night) with that former partner; and the uneasy feelings experienced by your current partner (boyfriend). Now those are the one... |
My boyfriend is upset about my friendship with another guy"I have a friend that who I used to be in a relationship with. It was brief and turned into us being just good friends.\
I spent the weekend with him and it upset my boyfriend. Was i wrong?" | "The most important thing to ask yourself here is, ""how did this action affect my relationship, and is it worth the consequences?"" Regardless of your intentions in this action, your boyfriend is uncomfortable with this type of behavior. From here, we can objectively decide if spending time with your previous partner ... | "Ideally you and your boyfriend will reach a balance point where you and your boyfriend are each happy with the level of involvement you have with your former boyfriend.Start w a discussion with your current boyfriend as to what specifically he doesn't like about your friendship with your former boyfriend.It is possibl... |
My boyfriend is upset about my friendship with another guy"I have a friend that who I used to be in a relationship with. It was brief and turned into us being just good friends.\
I spent the weekend with him and it upset my boyfriend. Was i wrong?" | "The most important thing to ask yourself here is, ""how did this action affect my relationship, and is it worth the consequences?"" Regardless of your intentions in this action, your boyfriend is uncomfortable with this type of behavior. From here, we can objectively decide if spending time with your previous partner ... | "This can be a very complicated situation. The boundaries of relationship include the rules to follow in the relationship. It is important to follow the rules of your relationship \'a0in regards to each person being able to spend time with exes. If you and your boyfriend agree upon a rule about spending time with exes,... |
My boyfriend is upset about my friendship with another guy"I have a friend that who I used to be in a relationship with. It was brief and turned into us being just good friends.\
I spent the weekend with him and it upset my boyfriend. Was i wrong?" | "The most important thing to ask yourself here is, ""how did this action affect my relationship, and is it worth the consequences?"" Regardless of your intentions in this action, your boyfriend is uncomfortable with this type of behavior. From here, we can objectively decide if spending time with your previous partner ... | "Thank you for submitting this question. I think this type of situation can be common for many couples struggling with how to keep friendships with past relationships while being in a new relationship.\'a0For me, more information is needed here...but given the information provided, the way I interpret the question is..... |
My boyfriend is upset about my friendship with another guy"I have a friend that who I used to be in a relationship with. It was brief and turned into us being just good friends.\
I spent the weekend with him and it upset my boyfriend. Was i wrong?" | "The most important thing to ask yourself here is, ""how did this action affect my relationship, and is it worth the consequences?"" Regardless of your intentions in this action, your boyfriend is uncomfortable with this type of behavior. From here, we can objectively decide if spending time with your previous partner ... | "That is a difficult situation and there is no right or wrong. You both need to discuss it and come up with a solution that works for the both of you. You want to spend time with your friend but your boyfriend \'a0may feel betrayed by you spending quality time with another man you have been intimate with. There may be ... |
My boyfriend is upset about my friendship with another guy"I have a friend that who I used to be in a relationship with. It was brief and turned into us being just good friends.\
I spent the weekend with him and it upset my boyfriend. Was i wrong?" | "The most important thing to ask yourself here is, ""how did this action affect my relationship, and is it worth the consequences?"" Regardless of your intentions in this action, your boyfriend is uncomfortable with this type of behavior. From here, we can objectively decide if spending time with your previous partner ... | "It's completely understandable that you would have male friends and that you would want to spend time with them. \'a0When you cross over from friends to a relationship, it does change things. \'a0Some people are very easy going and wouldn't feel threatened by what you did \'a0Others would be upset. \'a0If your boyfrie... |
My boyfriend is upset about my friendship with another guy"I have a friend that who I used to be in a relationship with. It was brief and turned into us being just good friends.\
I spent the weekend with him and it upset my boyfriend. Was i wrong?" | "While you can't be responsible for your boyfriend's feelings, relationships do come with expectations. \'a0Both people in a relationship bring their own expectations into it. \'a0These expectations are usually unspoken, but result in conflict as you are experiencing here! \'a0Your boyfriend expects you not to spend th... | "Depends on your definition of ""wrong"" on this one. Was it objectively wrong to spend the weekend with a good friend, who also happens to be an ex? Probably not. But, it upset your current boyfriend, and he is entitled to his feelings if you are in a relationship with him. He may be out of line if he assumes that any... |
My boyfriend is upset about my friendship with another guy"I have a friend that who I used to be in a relationship with. It was brief and turned into us being just good friends.\
I spent the weekend with him and it upset my boyfriend. Was i wrong?" | "Depends on your definition of ""wrong"" on this one. Was it objectively wrong to spend the weekend with a good friend, who also happens to be an ex? Probably not. But, it upset your current boyfriend, and he is entitled to his feelings if you are in a relationship with him. He may be out of line if he assumes that any... | "Hello. There are a number of factors playing into this situation. A former romantic partner coming back onto the scene during a current relationship; you spending alone time (and spending the night) with that former partner; and the uneasy feelings experienced by your current partner (boyfriend). Now those are the one... |
My boyfriend is upset about my friendship with another guy"I have a friend that who I used to be in a relationship with. It was brief and turned into us being just good friends.\
I spent the weekend with him and it upset my boyfriend. Was i wrong?" | "Ideally you and your boyfriend will reach a balance point where you and your boyfriend are each happy with the level of involvement you have with your former boyfriend.Start w a discussion with your current boyfriend as to what specifically he doesn't like about your friendship with your former boyfriend.It is possibl... | "Depends on your definition of ""wrong"" on this one. Was it objectively wrong to spend the weekend with a good friend, who also happens to be an ex? Probably not. But, it upset your current boyfriend, and he is entitled to his feelings if you are in a relationship with him. He may be out of line if he assumes that any... |
My boyfriend is upset about my friendship with another guy"I have a friend that who I used to be in a relationship with. It was brief and turned into us being just good friends.\
I spent the weekend with him and it upset my boyfriend. Was i wrong?" | "This can be a very complicated situation. The boundaries of relationship include the rules to follow in the relationship. It is important to follow the rules of your relationship \'a0in regards to each person being able to spend time with exes. If you and your boyfriend agree upon a rule about spending time with exes,... | "Depends on your definition of ""wrong"" on this one. Was it objectively wrong to spend the weekend with a good friend, who also happens to be an ex? Probably not. But, it upset your current boyfriend, and he is entitled to his feelings if you are in a relationship with him. He may be out of line if he assumes that any... |
My boyfriend is upset about my friendship with another guy"I have a friend that who I used to be in a relationship with. It was brief and turned into us being just good friends.\
I spent the weekend with him and it upset my boyfriend. Was i wrong?" | "Depends on your definition of ""wrong"" on this one. Was it objectively wrong to spend the weekend with a good friend, who also happens to be an ex? Probably not. But, it upset your current boyfriend, and he is entitled to his feelings if you are in a relationship with him. He may be out of line if he assumes that any... | "Thank you for submitting this question. I think this type of situation can be common for many couples struggling with how to keep friendships with past relationships while being in a new relationship.\'a0For me, more information is needed here...but given the information provided, the way I interpret the question is..... |
My boyfriend is upset about my friendship with another guy"I have a friend that who I used to be in a relationship with. It was brief and turned into us being just good friends.\
I spent the weekend with him and it upset my boyfriend. Was i wrong?" | "Depends on your definition of ""wrong"" on this one. Was it objectively wrong to spend the weekend with a good friend, who also happens to be an ex? Probably not. But, it upset your current boyfriend, and he is entitled to his feelings if you are in a relationship with him. He may be out of line if he assumes that any... | "That is a difficult situation and there is no right or wrong. You both need to discuss it and come up with a solution that works for the both of you. You want to spend time with your friend but your boyfriend \'a0may feel betrayed by you spending quality time with another man you have been intimate with. There may be ... |
My boyfriend is upset about my friendship with another guy"I have a friend that who I used to be in a relationship with. It was brief and turned into us being just good friends.\
I spent the weekend with him and it upset my boyfriend. Was i wrong?" | "Depends on your definition of ""wrong"" on this one. Was it objectively wrong to spend the weekend with a good friend, who also happens to be an ex? Probably not. But, it upset your current boyfriend, and he is entitled to his feelings if you are in a relationship with him. He may be out of line if he assumes that any... | "It's completely understandable that you would have male friends and that you would want to spend time with them. \'a0When you cross over from friends to a relationship, it does change things. \'a0Some people are very easy going and wouldn't feel threatened by what you did \'a0Others would be upset. \'a0If your boyfrie... |
My boyfriend is upset about my friendship with another guy"I have a friend that who I used to be in a relationship with. It was brief and turned into us being just good friends.\
I spent the weekend with him and it upset my boyfriend. Was i wrong?" | "While you can't be responsible for your boyfriend's feelings, relationships do come with expectations. \'a0Both people in a relationship bring their own expectations into it. \'a0These expectations are usually unspoken, but result in conflict as you are experiencing here! \'a0Your boyfriend expects you not to spend th... | "Hello. There are a number of factors playing into this situation. A former romantic partner coming back onto the scene during a current relationship; you spending alone time (and spending the night) with that former partner; and the uneasy feelings experienced by your current partner (boyfriend). Now those are the one... |
My boyfriend is upset about my friendship with another guy"I have a friend that who I used to be in a relationship with. It was brief and turned into us being just good friends.\
I spent the weekend with him and it upset my boyfriend. Was i wrong?" | "Ideally you and your boyfriend will reach a balance point where you and your boyfriend are each happy with the level of involvement you have with your former boyfriend.Start w a discussion with your current boyfriend as to what specifically he doesn't like about your friendship with your former boyfriend.It is possibl... | "While you can't be responsible for your boyfriend's feelings, relationships do come with expectations. \'a0Both people in a relationship bring their own expectations into it. \'a0These expectations are usually unspoken, but result in conflict as you are experiencing here! \'a0Your boyfriend expects you not to spend th... |
My boyfriend is upset about my friendship with another guy"I have a friend that who I used to be in a relationship with. It was brief and turned into us being just good friends.\
I spent the weekend with him and it upset my boyfriend. Was i wrong?" | "This can be a very complicated situation. The boundaries of relationship include the rules to follow in the relationship. It is important to follow the rules of your relationship \'a0in regards to each person being able to spend time with exes. If you and your boyfriend agree upon a rule about spending time with exes,... | "While you can't be responsible for your boyfriend's feelings, relationships do come with expectations. \'a0Both people in a relationship bring their own expectations into it. \'a0These expectations are usually unspoken, but result in conflict as you are experiencing here! \'a0Your boyfriend expects you not to spend th... |
My boyfriend is upset about my friendship with another guy"I have a friend that who I used to be in a relationship with. It was brief and turned into us being just good friends.\
I spent the weekend with him and it upset my boyfriend. Was i wrong?" | "While you can't be responsible for your boyfriend's feelings, relationships do come with expectations. \'a0Both people in a relationship bring their own expectations into it. \'a0These expectations are usually unspoken, but result in conflict as you are experiencing here! \'a0Your boyfriend expects you not to spend th... | "Thank you for submitting this question. I think this type of situation can be common for many couples struggling with how to keep friendships with past relationships while being in a new relationship.\'a0For me, more information is needed here...but given the information provided, the way I interpret the question is..... |
My boyfriend is upset about my friendship with another guy"I have a friend that who I used to be in a relationship with. It was brief and turned into us being just good friends.\
I spent the weekend with him and it upset my boyfriend. Was i wrong?" | "While you can't be responsible for your boyfriend's feelings, relationships do come with expectations. \'a0Both people in a relationship bring their own expectations into it. \'a0These expectations are usually unspoken, but result in conflict as you are experiencing here! \'a0Your boyfriend expects you not to spend th... | "That is a difficult situation and there is no right or wrong. You both need to discuss it and come up with a solution that works for the both of you. You want to spend time with your friend but your boyfriend \'a0may feel betrayed by you spending quality time with another man you have been intimate with. There may be ... |
My boyfriend is upset about my friendship with another guy"I have a friend that who I used to be in a relationship with. It was brief and turned into us being just good friends.\
I spent the weekend with him and it upset my boyfriend. Was i wrong?" | "While you can't be responsible for your boyfriend's feelings, relationships do come with expectations. \'a0Both people in a relationship bring their own expectations into it. \'a0These expectations are usually unspoken, but result in conflict as you are experiencing here! \'a0Your boyfriend expects you not to spend th... | "It's completely understandable that you would have male friends and that you would want to spend time with them. \'a0When you cross over from friends to a relationship, it does change things. \'a0Some people are very easy going and wouldn't feel threatened by what you did \'a0Others would be upset. \'a0If your boyfrie... |
My boyfriend is upset about my friendship with another guy"I have a friend that who I used to be in a relationship with. It was brief and turned into us being just good friends.\
I spent the weekend with him and it upset my boyfriend. Was i wrong?" | "Ideally you and your boyfriend will reach a balance point where you and your boyfriend are each happy with the level of involvement you have with your former boyfriend.Start w a discussion with your current boyfriend as to what specifically he doesn't like about your friendship with your former boyfriend.It is possibl... | "Hello. There are a number of factors playing into this situation. A former romantic partner coming back onto the scene during a current relationship; you spending alone time (and spending the night) with that former partner; and the uneasy feelings experienced by your current partner (boyfriend). Now those are the one... |
My boyfriend is upset about my friendship with another guy"I have a friend that who I used to be in a relationship with. It was brief and turned into us being just good friends.\
I spent the weekend with him and it upset my boyfriend. Was i wrong?" | "This can be a very complicated situation. The boundaries of relationship include the rules to follow in the relationship. It is important to follow the rules of your relationship \'a0in regards to each person being able to spend time with exes. If you and your boyfriend agree upon a rule about spending time with exes,... | "Hello. There are a number of factors playing into this situation. A former romantic partner coming back onto the scene during a current relationship; you spending alone time (and spending the night) with that former partner; and the uneasy feelings experienced by your current partner (boyfriend). Now those are the one... |
My boyfriend is upset about my friendship with another guy"I have a friend that who I used to be in a relationship with. It was brief and turned into us being just good friends.\
I spent the weekend with him and it upset my boyfriend. Was i wrong?" | "Hello. There are a number of factors playing into this situation. A former romantic partner coming back onto the scene during a current relationship; you spending alone time (and spending the night) with that former partner; and the uneasy feelings experienced by your current partner (boyfriend). Now those are the one... | "Thank you for submitting this question. I think this type of situation can be common for many couples struggling with how to keep friendships with past relationships while being in a new relationship.\'a0For me, more information is needed here...but given the information provided, the way I interpret the question is..... |
My boyfriend is upset about my friendship with another guy"I have a friend that who I used to be in a relationship with. It was brief and turned into us being just good friends.\
I spent the weekend with him and it upset my boyfriend. Was i wrong?" | "Hello. There are a number of factors playing into this situation. A former romantic partner coming back onto the scene during a current relationship; you spending alone time (and spending the night) with that former partner; and the uneasy feelings experienced by your current partner (boyfriend). Now those are the one... | "That is a difficult situation and there is no right or wrong. You both need to discuss it and come up with a solution that works for the both of you. You want to spend time with your friend but your boyfriend \'a0may feel betrayed by you spending quality time with another man you have been intimate with. There may be ... |
My boyfriend is upset about my friendship with another guy"I have a friend that who I used to be in a relationship with. It was brief and turned into us being just good friends.\
I spent the weekend with him and it upset my boyfriend. Was i wrong?" | "Hello. There are a number of factors playing into this situation. A former romantic partner coming back onto the scene during a current relationship; you spending alone time (and spending the night) with that former partner; and the uneasy feelings experienced by your current partner (boyfriend). Now those are the one... | "It's completely understandable that you would have male friends and that you would want to spend time with them. \'a0When you cross over from friends to a relationship, it does change things. \'a0Some people are very easy going and wouldn't feel threatened by what you did \'a0Others would be upset. \'a0If your boyfrie... |
My boyfriend is upset about my friendship with another guy"I have a friend that who I used to be in a relationship with. It was brief and turned into us being just good friends.\
I spent the weekend with him and it upset my boyfriend. Was i wrong?" | "Ideally you and your boyfriend will reach a balance point where you and your boyfriend are each happy with the level of involvement you have with your former boyfriend.Start w a discussion with your current boyfriend as to what specifically he doesn't like about your friendship with your former boyfriend.It is possibl... | "This can be a very complicated situation. The boundaries of relationship include the rules to follow in the relationship. It is important to follow the rules of your relationship \'a0in regards to each person being able to spend time with exes. If you and your boyfriend agree upon a rule about spending time with exes,... |
My boyfriend is upset about my friendship with another guy"I have a friend that who I used to be in a relationship with. It was brief and turned into us being just good friends.\
I spent the weekend with him and it upset my boyfriend. Was i wrong?" | "Ideally you and your boyfriend will reach a balance point where you and your boyfriend are each happy with the level of involvement you have with your former boyfriend.Start w a discussion with your current boyfriend as to what specifically he doesn't like about your friendship with your former boyfriend.It is possibl... | "Thank you for submitting this question. I think this type of situation can be common for many couples struggling with how to keep friendships with past relationships while being in a new relationship.\'a0For me, more information is needed here...but given the information provided, the way I interpret the question is..... |
My boyfriend is upset about my friendship with another guy"I have a friend that who I used to be in a relationship with. It was brief and turned into us being just good friends.\
I spent the weekend with him and it upset my boyfriend. Was i wrong?" | "Ideally you and your boyfriend will reach a balance point where you and your boyfriend are each happy with the level of involvement you have with your former boyfriend.Start w a discussion with your current boyfriend as to what specifically he doesn't like about your friendship with your former boyfriend.It is possibl... | "That is a difficult situation and there is no right or wrong. You both need to discuss it and come up with a solution that works for the both of you. You want to spend time with your friend but your boyfriend \'a0may feel betrayed by you spending quality time with another man you have been intimate with. There may be ... |
My boyfriend is upset about my friendship with another guy"I have a friend that who I used to be in a relationship with. It was brief and turned into us being just good friends.\
I spent the weekend with him and it upset my boyfriend. Was i wrong?" | "Ideally you and your boyfriend will reach a balance point where you and your boyfriend are each happy with the level of involvement you have with your former boyfriend.Start w a discussion with your current boyfriend as to what specifically he doesn't like about your friendship with your former boyfriend.It is possibl... | "It's completely understandable that you would have male friends and that you would want to spend time with them. \'a0When you cross over from friends to a relationship, it does change things. \'a0Some people are very easy going and wouldn't feel threatened by what you did \'a0Others would be upset. \'a0If your boyfrie... |
My boyfriend is upset about my friendship with another guy"I have a friend that who I used to be in a relationship with. It was brief and turned into us being just good friends.\
I spent the weekend with him and it upset my boyfriend. Was i wrong?" | "This can be a very complicated situation. The boundaries of relationship include the rules to follow in the relationship. It is important to follow the rules of your relationship \'a0in regards to each person being able to spend time with exes. If you and your boyfriend agree upon a rule about spending time with exes,... | "Thank you for submitting this question. I think this type of situation can be common for many couples struggling with how to keep friendships with past relationships while being in a new relationship.\'a0For me, more information is needed here...but given the information provided, the way I interpret the question is..... |
My boyfriend is upset about my friendship with another guy"I have a friend that who I used to be in a relationship with. It was brief and turned into us being just good friends.\
I spent the weekend with him and it upset my boyfriend. Was i wrong?" | "This can be a very complicated situation. The boundaries of relationship include the rules to follow in the relationship. It is important to follow the rules of your relationship \'a0in regards to each person being able to spend time with exes. If you and your boyfriend agree upon a rule about spending time with exes,... | "That is a difficult situation and there is no right or wrong. You both need to discuss it and come up with a solution that works for the both of you. You want to spend time with your friend but your boyfriend \'a0may feel betrayed by you spending quality time with another man you have been intimate with. There may be ... |
My boyfriend is upset about my friendship with another guy"I have a friend that who I used to be in a relationship with. It was brief and turned into us being just good friends.\
I spent the weekend with him and it upset my boyfriend. Was i wrong?" | "This can be a very complicated situation. The boundaries of relationship include the rules to follow in the relationship. It is important to follow the rules of your relationship \'a0in regards to each person being able to spend time with exes. If you and your boyfriend agree upon a rule about spending time with exes,... | "It's completely understandable that you would have male friends and that you would want to spend time with them. \'a0When you cross over from friends to a relationship, it does change things. \'a0Some people are very easy going and wouldn't feel threatened by what you did \'a0Others would be upset. \'a0If your boyfrie... |
My boyfriend is upset about my friendship with another guy"I have a friend that who I used to be in a relationship with. It was brief and turned into us being just good friends.\
I spent the weekend with him and it upset my boyfriend. Was i wrong?" | "That is a difficult situation and there is no right or wrong. You both need to discuss it and come up with a solution that works for the both of you. You want to spend time with your friend but your boyfriend \'a0may feel betrayed by you spending quality time with another man you have been intimate with. There may be ... | "Thank you for submitting this question. I think this type of situation can be common for many couples struggling with how to keep friendships with past relationships while being in a new relationship.\'a0For me, more information is needed here...but given the information provided, the way I interpret the question is..... |
My boyfriend is upset about my friendship with another guy"I have a friend that who I used to be in a relationship with. It was brief and turned into us being just good friends.\
I spent the weekend with him and it upset my boyfriend. Was i wrong?" | "Thank you for submitting this question. I think this type of situation can be common for many couples struggling with how to keep friendships with past relationships while being in a new relationship.\'a0For me, more information is needed here...but given the information provided, the way I interpret the question is..... | "It's completely understandable that you would have male friends and that you would want to spend time with them. \'a0When you cross over from friends to a relationship, it does change things. \'a0Some people are very easy going and wouldn't feel threatened by what you did \'a0Others would be upset. \'a0If your boyfrie... |
My boyfriend is upset about my friendship with another guy"I have a friend that who I used to be in a relationship with. It was brief and turned into us being just good friends.\
I spent the weekend with him and it upset my boyfriend. Was i wrong?" | "That is a difficult situation and there is no right or wrong. You both need to discuss it and come up with a solution that works for the both of you. You want to spend time with your friend but your boyfriend \'a0may feel betrayed by you spending quality time with another man you have been intimate with. There may be ... | "It's completely understandable that you would have male friends and that you would want to spend time with them. \'a0When you cross over from friends to a relationship, it does change things. \'a0Some people are very easy going and wouldn't feel threatened by what you did \'a0Others would be upset. \'a0If your boyfrie... |
Why can't I let myself trust my partner?"I've been with my partner for years. She's given me no reason not to trust her. But lately I've been overreacting a lot when she's just doing normal things. I think it's triggering my bad past relationships.\
How can I get rid of these insecurities and be more trusting with ... | "Remember that all relationships center around 3 simple values: HonestyTrustand Respect......in that order, too...If you are unable to trust, then you are fundamentally dishonest about something in yourself;Moreover, whatever you do not honestly experience, you do not honestly express out to another;To be honest with o... | "What's most important is that you recognize that what you've been doing is off base - that what you've been feeling is ""overreacting,"" that you have ""insecurities,"" and you suspect your actions and reactions are connected to your own past and not to the current situation or to your partner. That's an excellent fir... |
How can I deal with a \'crush\' in a relationship?I\'ve been in a long distance relationship with my girlfriend for just over a year. This past week she admitted to me that she has feelings for another guy. She says it\'s \'just a crush\' but I don't know how to cope with it. How should I deal with this? | "Long distance relationships are very difficult to maintain, not just for the lack of communication, but also because of the lack of intimacy that comes along with it. Even if you have spectacular communication while in a long-distance relationship, it is difficult to maintain intimacy because you are lacking in the ph... | "Hi! It sounds like you are stuck in a difficult place. You do not want to appear to jealous and yet, it's hard not to be, when you hear about ""the crush"". It's only natural to feel a little insecure and you're doing a great job by asking how to cope better. First of all, long-distance relationships are very hard. Is... |
How can I deal with a \'crush\' in a relationship?I\'ve been in a long distance relationship with my girlfriend for just over a year. This past week she admitted to me that she has feelings for another guy. She says it\'s \'just a crush\' but I don't know how to cope with it. How should I deal with this? | "Hi! It sounds like you are stuck in a difficult place. You do not want to appear to jealous and yet, it's hard not to be, when you hear about ""the crush"". It's only natural to feel a little insecure and you're doing a great job by asking how to cope better. First of all, long-distance relationships are very hard. Is... | "Thanks for writing in. Several things come to mind:I don't know how you are communicating, but there is a great deal of difference between communicating through videoconferencing compared to text message when discussing subjects like this. Being able to hear and/or see each other will help you to be able to gauge a lo... |
How can I deal with a \'crush\' in a relationship?I\'ve been in a long distance relationship with my girlfriend for just over a year. This past week she admitted to me that she has feelings for another guy. She says it\'s \'just a crush\' but I don't know how to cope with it. How should I deal with this? | "Hi! It sounds like you are stuck in a difficult place. You do not want to appear to jealous and yet, it's hard not to be, when you hear about ""the crush"". It's only natural to feel a little insecure and you're doing a great job by asking how to cope better. First of all, long-distance relationships are very hard. Is... | "Often, communication is the key within relationships. When faced with our significant other telling us about a \'93crush\'94, it can create or highlight feelings or thoughts that can promote feelings of insecurity. Talk to your partner about their crush and use the conversation to strengthen your bond.", |
How can I deal with a \'crush\' in a relationship?I\'ve been in a long distance relationship with my girlfriend for just over a year. This past week she admitted to me that she has feelings for another guy. She says it\'s \'just a crush\' but I don't know how to cope with it. How should I deal with this? | "Hi! It sounds like you are stuck in a difficult place. You do not want to appear to jealous and yet, it's hard not to be, when you hear about ""the crush"". It's only natural to feel a little insecure and you're doing a great job by asking how to cope better. First of all, long-distance relationships are very hard. Is... | "No one can tell you how to deal with your own relationship, even a therapist. But, you should absolutely give your girlfriend the respect of believing both of those statements she gives you: development of feelings and it being a ""crush."" If that makes you feel a certain way (mistrustful? no difference in feelings) ... |
How can I deal with a \'crush\' in a relationship?I\'ve been in a long distance relationship with my girlfriend for just over a year. This past week she admitted to me that she has feelings for another guy. She says it\'s \'just a crush\' but I don't know how to cope with it. How should I deal with this? | "Hi! It sounds like you are stuck in a difficult place. You do not want to appear to jealous and yet, it's hard not to be, when you hear about ""the crush"". It's only natural to feel a little insecure and you're doing a great job by asking how to cope better. First of all, long-distance relationships are very hard. Is... | "Long distance relationships have the addition strain of being far away. \'a0It sounds like you and your girlfriend overcame the initial challenges considering that you\'92ve been together for over a year and she was honest in telling you about her crush. \'a0These are some clear strengths in your relationship. \'a0Now... |
How can I deal with a \'crush\' in a relationship?I\'ve been in a long distance relationship with my girlfriend for just over a year. This past week she admitted to me that she has feelings for another guy. She says it\'s \'just a crush\' but I don't know how to cope with it. How should I deal with this? | "Hi! It sounds like you are stuck in a difficult place. You do not want to appear to jealous and yet, it's hard not to be, when you hear about ""the crush"". It's only natural to feel a little insecure and you're doing a great job by asking how to cope better. First of all, long-distance relationships are very hard. Is... | "Did your girlfriend tell you her reason to tell you about the new person?Your feelings of insecurity is natural because you don't know where the crush fits into her life.Since any long-lasting relationship in which both people thrive, means each partner freely speaks their mind and will be listened and responded, then... |
How can I deal with a \'crush\' in a relationship?I\'ve been in a long distance relationship with my girlfriend for just over a year. This past week she admitted to me that she has feelings for another guy. She says it\'s \'just a crush\' but I don't know how to cope with it. How should I deal with this? | "Hi! It sounds like you are stuck in a difficult place. You do not want to appear to jealous and yet, it's hard not to be, when you hear about ""the crush"". It's only natural to feel a little insecure and you're doing a great job by asking how to cope better. First of all, long-distance relationships are very hard. Is... | "Those words must have been extremely difficult to hear or read. It sounds like you are both having difficulty with the distance, and I can only imagine that you have both been coping with this distance as well as you can. There are a few scenarios that I think would have pretty radically different paths for your own m... |
How can I deal with a \'crush\' in a relationship?I\'ve been in a long distance relationship with my girlfriend for just over a year. This past week she admitted to me that she has feelings for another guy. She says it\'s \'just a crush\' but I don't know how to cope with it. How should I deal with this? | "Long distance relationships are very difficult to maintain, not just for the lack of communication, but also because of the lack of intimacy that comes along with it. Even if you have spectacular communication while in a long-distance relationship, it is difficult to maintain intimacy because you are lacking in the ph... | "Thanks for writing in. Several things come to mind:I don't know how you are communicating, but there is a great deal of difference between communicating through videoconferencing compared to text message when discussing subjects like this. Being able to hear and/or see each other will help you to be able to gauge a lo... |
How can I deal with a \'crush\' in a relationship?I\'ve been in a long distance relationship with my girlfriend for just over a year. This past week she admitted to me that she has feelings for another guy. She says it\'s \'just a crush\' but I don't know how to cope with it. How should I deal with this? | "Long distance relationships are very difficult to maintain, not just for the lack of communication, but also because of the lack of intimacy that comes along with it. Even if you have spectacular communication while in a long-distance relationship, it is difficult to maintain intimacy because you are lacking in the ph... | "Often, communication is the key within relationships. When faced with our significant other telling us about a \'93crush\'94, it can create or highlight feelings or thoughts that can promote feelings of insecurity. Talk to your partner about their crush and use the conversation to strengthen your bond.", |
How can I deal with a \'crush\' in a relationship?I\'ve been in a long distance relationship with my girlfriend for just over a year. This past week she admitted to me that she has feelings for another guy. She says it\'s \'just a crush\' but I don't know how to cope with it. How should I deal with this? | "Long distance relationships are very difficult to maintain, not just for the lack of communication, but also because of the lack of intimacy that comes along with it. Even if you have spectacular communication while in a long-distance relationship, it is difficult to maintain intimacy because you are lacking in the ph... | "No one can tell you how to deal with your own relationship, even a therapist. But, you should absolutely give your girlfriend the respect of believing both of those statements she gives you: development of feelings and it being a ""crush."" If that makes you feel a certain way (mistrustful? no difference in feelings) ... |
How can I deal with a \'crush\' in a relationship?I\'ve been in a long distance relationship with my girlfriend for just over a year. This past week she admitted to me that she has feelings for another guy. She says it\'s \'just a crush\' but I don't know how to cope with it. How should I deal with this? | "Long distance relationships are very difficult to maintain, not just for the lack of communication, but also because of the lack of intimacy that comes along with it. Even if you have spectacular communication while in a long-distance relationship, it is difficult to maintain intimacy because you are lacking in the ph... | "Long distance relationships have the addition strain of being far away. \'a0It sounds like you and your girlfriend overcame the initial challenges considering that you\'92ve been together for over a year and she was honest in telling you about her crush. \'a0These are some clear strengths in your relationship. \'a0Now... |
How can I deal with a \'crush\' in a relationship?I\'ve been in a long distance relationship with my girlfriend for just over a year. This past week she admitted to me that she has feelings for another guy. She says it\'s \'just a crush\' but I don't know how to cope with it. How should I deal with this? | "Long distance relationships are very difficult to maintain, not just for the lack of communication, but also because of the lack of intimacy that comes along with it. Even if you have spectacular communication while in a long-distance relationship, it is difficult to maintain intimacy because you are lacking in the ph... | "Did your girlfriend tell you her reason to tell you about the new person?Your feelings of insecurity is natural because you don't know where the crush fits into her life.Since any long-lasting relationship in which both people thrive, means each partner freely speaks their mind and will be listened and responded, then... |
How can I deal with a \'crush\' in a relationship?I\'ve been in a long distance relationship with my girlfriend for just over a year. This past week she admitted to me that she has feelings for another guy. She says it\'s \'just a crush\' but I don't know how to cope with it. How should I deal with this? | "Long distance relationships are very difficult to maintain, not just for the lack of communication, but also because of the lack of intimacy that comes along with it. Even if you have spectacular communication while in a long-distance relationship, it is difficult to maintain intimacy because you are lacking in the ph... | "Those words must have been extremely difficult to hear or read. It sounds like you are both having difficulty with the distance, and I can only imagine that you have both been coping with this distance as well as you can. There are a few scenarios that I think would have pretty radically different paths for your own m... |
How can I deal with a \'crush\' in a relationship?I\'ve been in a long distance relationship with my girlfriend for just over a year. This past week she admitted to me that she has feelings for another guy. She says it\'s \'just a crush\' but I don't know how to cope with it. How should I deal with this? | "Thanks for writing in. Several things come to mind:I don't know how you are communicating, but there is a great deal of difference between communicating through videoconferencing compared to text message when discussing subjects like this. Being able to hear and/or see each other will help you to be able to gauge a lo... | "Often, communication is the key within relationships. When faced with our significant other telling us about a \'93crush\'94, it can create or highlight feelings or thoughts that can promote feelings of insecurity. Talk to your partner about their crush and use the conversation to strengthen your bond.", |
How can I deal with a \'crush\' in a relationship?I\'ve been in a long distance relationship with my girlfriend for just over a year. This past week she admitted to me that she has feelings for another guy. She says it\'s \'just a crush\' but I don't know how to cope with it. How should I deal with this? | "Thanks for writing in. Several things come to mind:I don't know how you are communicating, but there is a great deal of difference between communicating through videoconferencing compared to text message when discussing subjects like this. Being able to hear and/or see each other will help you to be able to gauge a lo... | "No one can tell you how to deal with your own relationship, even a therapist. But, you should absolutely give your girlfriend the respect of believing both of those statements she gives you: development of feelings and it being a ""crush."" If that makes you feel a certain way (mistrustful? no difference in feelings) ... |
How can I deal with a \'crush\' in a relationship?I\'ve been in a long distance relationship with my girlfriend for just over a year. This past week she admitted to me that she has feelings for another guy. She says it\'s \'just a crush\' but I don't know how to cope with it. How should I deal with this? | "Thanks for writing in. Several things come to mind:I don't know how you are communicating, but there is a great deal of difference between communicating through videoconferencing compared to text message when discussing subjects like this. Being able to hear and/or see each other will help you to be able to gauge a lo... | "Long distance relationships have the addition strain of being far away. \'a0It sounds like you and your girlfriend overcame the initial challenges considering that you\'92ve been together for over a year and she was honest in telling you about her crush. \'a0These are some clear strengths in your relationship. \'a0Now... |
How can I deal with a \'crush\' in a relationship?I\'ve been in a long distance relationship with my girlfriend for just over a year. This past week she admitted to me that she has feelings for another guy. She says it\'s \'just a crush\' but I don't know how to cope with it. How should I deal with this? | "Thanks for writing in. Several things come to mind:I don't know how you are communicating, but there is a great deal of difference between communicating through videoconferencing compared to text message when discussing subjects like this. Being able to hear and/or see each other will help you to be able to gauge a lo... | "Did your girlfriend tell you her reason to tell you about the new person?Your feelings of insecurity is natural because you don't know where the crush fits into her life.Since any long-lasting relationship in which both people thrive, means each partner freely speaks their mind and will be listened and responded, then... |
How can I deal with a \'crush\' in a relationship?I\'ve been in a long distance relationship with my girlfriend for just over a year. This past week she admitted to me that she has feelings for another guy. She says it\'s \'just a crush\' but I don't know how to cope with it. How should I deal with this? | "Thanks for writing in. Several things come to mind:I don't know how you are communicating, but there is a great deal of difference between communicating through videoconferencing compared to text message when discussing subjects like this. Being able to hear and/or see each other will help you to be able to gauge a lo... | "Those words must have been extremely difficult to hear or read. It sounds like you are both having difficulty with the distance, and I can only imagine that you have both been coping with this distance as well as you can. There are a few scenarios that I think would have pretty radically different paths for your own m... |
How can I deal with a \'crush\' in a relationship?I\'ve been in a long distance relationship with my girlfriend for just over a year. This past week she admitted to me that she has feelings for another guy. She says it\'s \'just a crush\' but I don't know how to cope with it. How should I deal with this? | "Often, communication is the key within relationships. When faced with our significant other telling us about a \'93crush\'94, it can create or highlight feelings or thoughts that can promote feelings of insecurity. Talk to your partner about their crush and use the conversation to strengthen your bond.", | "No one can tell you how to deal with your own relationship, even a therapist. But, you should absolutely give your girlfriend the respect of believing both of those statements she gives you: development of feelings and it being a ""crush."" If that makes you feel a certain way (mistrustful? no difference in feelings) ... |
How can I deal with a \'crush\' in a relationship?I\'ve been in a long distance relationship with my girlfriend for just over a year. This past week she admitted to me that she has feelings for another guy. She says it\'s \'just a crush\' but I don't know how to cope with it. How should I deal with this? | "Often, communication is the key within relationships. When faced with our significant other telling us about a \'93crush\'94, it can create or highlight feelings or thoughts that can promote feelings of insecurity. Talk to your partner about their crush and use the conversation to strengthen your bond.", | "Long distance relationships have the addition strain of being far away. \'a0It sounds like you and your girlfriend overcame the initial challenges considering that you\'92ve been together for over a year and she was honest in telling you about her crush. \'a0These are some clear strengths in your relationship. \'a0Now... |
How can I deal with a \'crush\' in a relationship?I\'ve been in a long distance relationship with my girlfriend for just over a year. This past week she admitted to me that she has feelings for another guy. She says it\'s \'just a crush\' but I don't know how to cope with it. How should I deal with this? | "Often, communication is the key within relationships. When faced with our significant other telling us about a \'93crush\'94, it can create or highlight feelings or thoughts that can promote feelings of insecurity. Talk to your partner about their crush and use the conversation to strengthen your bond.", | "Did your girlfriend tell you her reason to tell you about the new person?Your feelings of insecurity is natural because you don't know where the crush fits into her life.Since any long-lasting relationship in which both people thrive, means each partner freely speaks their mind and will be listened and responded, then... |
How can I deal with a \'crush\' in a relationship?I\'ve been in a long distance relationship with my girlfriend for just over a year. This past week she admitted to me that she has feelings for another guy. She says it\'s \'just a crush\' but I don't know how to cope with it. How should I deal with this? | "Often, communication is the key within relationships. When faced with our significant other telling us about a \'93crush\'94, it can create or highlight feelings or thoughts that can promote feelings of insecurity. Talk to your partner about their crush and use the conversation to strengthen your bond.", | "Those words must have been extremely difficult to hear or read. It sounds like you are both having difficulty with the distance, and I can only imagine that you have both been coping with this distance as well as you can. There are a few scenarios that I think would have pretty radically different paths for your own m... |
How can I deal with a \'crush\' in a relationship?I\'ve been in a long distance relationship with my girlfriend for just over a year. This past week she admitted to me that she has feelings for another guy. She says it\'s \'just a crush\' but I don't know how to cope with it. How should I deal with this? | "No one can tell you how to deal with your own relationship, even a therapist. But, you should absolutely give your girlfriend the respect of believing both of those statements she gives you: development of feelings and it being a ""crush."" If that makes you feel a certain way (mistrustful? no difference in feelings) ... | "Long distance relationships have the addition strain of being far away. \'a0It sounds like you and your girlfriend overcame the initial challenges considering that you\'92ve been together for over a year and she was honest in telling you about her crush. \'a0These are some clear strengths in your relationship. \'a0Now... |
How can I deal with a \'crush\' in a relationship?I\'ve been in a long distance relationship with my girlfriend for just over a year. This past week she admitted to me that she has feelings for another guy. She says it\'s \'just a crush\' but I don't know how to cope with it. How should I deal with this? | "No one can tell you how to deal with your own relationship, even a therapist. But, you should absolutely give your girlfriend the respect of believing both of those statements she gives you: development of feelings and it being a ""crush."" If that makes you feel a certain way (mistrustful? no difference in feelings) ... | "Did your girlfriend tell you her reason to tell you about the new person?Your feelings of insecurity is natural because you don't know where the crush fits into her life.Since any long-lasting relationship in which both people thrive, means each partner freely speaks their mind and will be listened and responded, then... |
How can I deal with a \'crush\' in a relationship?I\'ve been in a long distance relationship with my girlfriend for just over a year. This past week she admitted to me that she has feelings for another guy. She says it\'s \'just a crush\' but I don't know how to cope with it. How should I deal with this? | "No one can tell you how to deal with your own relationship, even a therapist. But, you should absolutely give your girlfriend the respect of believing both of those statements she gives you: development of feelings and it being a ""crush."" If that makes you feel a certain way (mistrustful? no difference in feelings) ... | "Those words must have been extremely difficult to hear or read. It sounds like you are both having difficulty with the distance, and I can only imagine that you have both been coping with this distance as well as you can. There are a few scenarios that I think would have pretty radically different paths for your own m... |
How can I deal with a \'crush\' in a relationship?I\'ve been in a long distance relationship with my girlfriend for just over a year. This past week she admitted to me that she has feelings for another guy. She says it\'s \'just a crush\' but I don't know how to cope with it. How should I deal with this? | "Did your girlfriend tell you her reason to tell you about the new person?Your feelings of insecurity is natural because you don't know where the crush fits into her life.Since any long-lasting relationship in which both people thrive, means each partner freely speaks their mind and will be listened and responded, then... | "Long distance relationships have the addition strain of being far away. \'a0It sounds like you and your girlfriend overcame the initial challenges considering that you\'92ve been together for over a year and she was honest in telling you about her crush. \'a0These are some clear strengths in your relationship. \'a0Now... |
How can I deal with a \'crush\' in a relationship?I\'ve been in a long distance relationship with my girlfriend for just over a year. This past week she admitted to me that she has feelings for another guy. She says it\'s \'just a crush\' but I don't know how to cope with it. How should I deal with this? | "Long distance relationships have the addition strain of being far away. \'a0It sounds like you and your girlfriend overcame the initial challenges considering that you\'92ve been together for over a year and she was honest in telling you about her crush. \'a0These are some clear strengths in your relationship. \'a0Now... | "Those words must have been extremely difficult to hear or read. It sounds like you are both having difficulty with the distance, and I can only imagine that you have both been coping with this distance as well as you can. There are a few scenarios that I think would have pretty radically different paths for your own m... |
How can I deal with a \'crush\' in a relationship?I\'ve been in a long distance relationship with my girlfriend for just over a year. This past week she admitted to me that she has feelings for another guy. She says it\'s \'just a crush\' but I don't know how to cope with it. How should I deal with this? | "Did your girlfriend tell you her reason to tell you about the new person?Your feelings of insecurity is natural because you don't know where the crush fits into her life.Since any long-lasting relationship in which both people thrive, means each partner freely speaks their mind and will be listened and responded, then... | "Those words must have been extremely difficult to hear or read. It sounds like you are both having difficulty with the distance, and I can only imagine that you have both been coping with this distance as well as you can. There are a few scenarios that I think would have pretty radically different paths for your own m... |
My ex-boyfriend say we're finished but still acts like we aren't"I've been with a man for four years. For the last year he has said he is done but he still talks texts visits and has not moved on with anyone else. His words do not match his actions. I love this man but it's hurting so much." | "Have you brought up the topic as to the way you're feeling?The best way for someone to understand us or to understand someone, is to directly talk about \'a0the specific problem.To start the discussion w your partner, understand your own reasons for continuing the relationship.Given his stated disinterest in the relat... | "That does sound very confusing...and hurtful.\'a0 You do not have to tolerate someone treating you in a way that hurts you.\'a0 It may be helpful to decide where the boundaries are for you and to stay true to them in your interactions with him.\'a0 You teach other people how they are allowed to treat you.", |
My ex-boyfriend say we're finished but still acts like we aren't"I've been with a man for four years. For the last year he has said he is done but he still talks texts visits and has not moved on with anyone else. His words do not match his actions. I love this man but it's hurting so much." | "This can be difficult and confusing.If you think your boyfriend would be open to having a discussion, try asking him for a time when he is willing to have an important discussion. When that time matches with a time that is good for you, try discussing the type of relationship that you each want to have and what you ca... | "That does sound very confusing...and hurtful.\'a0 You do not have to tolerate someone treating you in a way that hurts you.\'a0 It may be helpful to decide where the boundaries are for you and to stay true to them in your interactions with him.\'a0 You teach other people how they are allowed to treat you.", |
My ex-boyfriend say we're finished but still acts like we aren't"I've been with a man for four years. For the last year he has said he is done but he still talks texts visits and has not moved on with anyone else. His words do not match his actions. I love this man but it's hurting so much." | "Have you brought up the topic as to the way you're feeling?The best way for someone to understand us or to understand someone, is to directly talk about \'a0the specific problem.To start the discussion w your partner, understand your own reasons for continuing the relationship.Given his stated disinterest in the relat... | "This can be difficult and confusing.If you think your boyfriend would be open to having a discussion, try asking him for a time when he is willing to have an important discussion. When that time matches with a time that is good for you, try discussing the type of relationship that you each want to have and what you ca... |
I want to become a better manI'm having relationship problems and I want to fix them to make things right before I lose her. How can I learn how to listen and get myself together? | "Hello, and thank you for your question. First, I want to say that it is great that you are are willing to admit that you share some responsibility in some of the relationship problems you are having. This isn't always easy to do, but it sure is important if you want to see improvement. It does sound cliche, but commun... | "Thanks for your question. Becoming a good listener is an essential piece in being a better communicator. Being an effective communicator will almost always improve the quality of your relationships.\'a0What stands in your way of listening to her? Do you find yourself becoming defensive when she brings up issues? Do yo... |
I want to become a better manI'm having relationship problems and I want to fix them to make things right before I lose her. How can I learn how to listen and get myself together? | "The best tool for becoming a better listener that I know of is called Imago Dialogue. It consists of 3 steps:1. Mirroring what she says (without judging, commenting, refuting, defending, arguing, or scoffing--just listening, no matter the content) and repeating it back, word-for-word. Continue to ask if she has more t... | "Hello, and thank you for your question. First, I want to say that it is great that you are are willing to admit that you share some responsibility in some of the relationship problems you are having. This isn't always easy to do, but it sure is important if you want to see improvement. It does sound cliche, but commun... |
I want to become a better manI'm having relationship problems and I want to fix them to make things right before I lose her. How can I learn how to listen and get myself together? | "Hello, and thank you for your question. First, I want to say that it is great that you are are willing to admit that you share some responsibility in some of the relationship problems you are having. This isn't always easy to do, but it sure is important if you want to see improvement. It does sound cliche, but commun... | "I love that you are so thoughtful and proactive about this!\'a0 If only every client came in as solution focused as you, my job would be so much easier. I would second\'a0Robin's suggestion of reading ANYTHING by Gottmann. He's fantastic.\'a0Other favorites of mine are:\'93Getting Together and Staying Together: Solvin... |
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