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bilibili_data_22095156_BV19a4y1q7Yz_p108_BV19a4y1q7Yz_p108_m4-dialogue_0441790 | [S1] We do. I appreciate you so much. Thanks for having me. [S2] Thank you. [S1] You are welcome. [S2] Dr. Tama Bryant, thank you. | 8.88 | 3.163566 | 24,000 | audio/en/bilibili_data_22095156_BV19a4y1q7Yz_p108_BV19a4y1q7Yz_p108_m4-dialogue_0441790.mp3 | [
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bilibili_data_22095156_BV19a4y1q7Yz_p108_BV19a4y1q7Yz_p108_m4-dialogue_0441791 | [S1] When you stay connected to your authentic self, you also stay connected to the truth and to your commitment, to peace, to love, to connection, and to the light. I'll talk to you in a few days. Oh, and one more thing. And no, this is not a blooper. [S2] [LAUGHS] [S1] This is the legal language. You know, what the l... | 26.44 | 3.021837 | 24,000 | audio/en/bilibili_data_22095156_BV19a4y1q7Yz_p108_BV19a4y1q7Yz_p108_m4-dialogue_0441791.mp3 | [
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bilibili_data_22095156_BV19a4y1q7Yz_p109_BV19a4y1q7Yz_p109_m4-dialogue_0164812 | [S1] Oh, do we ever. You know, I was, I'm, I'm pretty emotional today. [S2] Yeah. [S1] Because I'm here in Los Angeles because our, uh, one of our daughters is graduating from college in a couple of days. And I am going, after our interview, | 15 | 3.46241 | 24,000 | audio/en/bilibili_data_22095156_BV19a4y1q7Yz_p109_BV19a4y1q7Yz_p109_m4-dialogue_0164812.mp3 | [
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bilibili_data_22095156_BV19a4y1q7Yz_p109_BV19a4y1q7Yz_p109_m4-dialogue_0164813 | [S1] ... to hear her do her final senior performance. [S2] Ah, beautiful. [S1] And it's a full circle moment 'cause I'm going to the theater where she got her invitation to audition, to even be admitted into the program. [S2] Wow. [S1] And I've been calling it a full circle moment. [S2] Mm-hmm. [S1] But what I realize ... | 28.84 | 3.544048 | 24,000 | audio/en/bilibili_data_22095156_BV19a4y1q7Yz_p109_BV19a4y1q7Yz_p109_m4-dialogue_0164813.mp3 | [
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bilibili_data_22095156_BV19a4y1q7Yz_p109_BV19a4y1q7Yz_p109_m4-dialogue_0164814 | [S1] It makes me emotional to think about this because I lived for so long feeling what you would call psychologically homeless. [S2] Yes. [S1] Disconnected from my true self. [S2] Mm-hmm. [S1] And the feeling that you have when you finally feel whole. | 26.36 | 3.244178 | 24,000 | audio/en/bilibili_data_22095156_BV19a4y1q7Yz_p109_BV19a4y1q7Yz_p109_m4-dialogue_0164814.mp3 | [
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bilibili_data_22095156_BV19a4y1q7Yz_p109_BV19a4y1q7Yz_p109_m4-dialogue_0164815 | [S1] It is unlike anything I've ever experienced. [S2] Yes. [S1] And I appreciate the honesty and the transparency because we do get disconnected. You know, life disconnects us and, you know, if you don't mind saying, how could you tell you were disconnected or what was it like when you were psychologically wandering? ... | 26.76 | 3.305429 | 24,000 | audio/en/bilibili_data_22095156_BV19a4y1q7Yz_p109_BV19a4y1q7Yz_p109_m4-dialogue_0164815.mp3 | [
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bilibili_data_22095156_BV19a4y1q7Yz_p109_BV19a4y1q7Yz_p109_m4-dialogue_0164816 | [S1] There was the physical me. [S2] Mm-hmm. [S1] Walking around in my life doing the things that we all do, getting up, going to work, taking care of the kids, calling friends, watching TV. But there was a part of me that was separate, that felt, um, | 20.16 | 3.282966 | 24,000 | audio/en/bilibili_data_22095156_BV19a4y1q7Yz_p109_BV19a4y1q7Yz_p109_m4-dialogue_0164816.mp3 | [
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bilibili_data_22095156_BV19a4y1q7Yz_p109_BV19a4y1q7Yz_p109_m4-dialogue_0164817 | [S1] I guess you could call it like a knowing. [S2] Mm-hmm. [S1] I, I wonder if even that critical voice that we listen to is also almost like grinding at you because you're not really on a path where you feel like you are truly, I mean, and sometimes I think back, I think I, I didn't even feel like I was alive for cry... | 26.4 | 3.387004 | 24,000 | audio/en/bilibili_data_22095156_BV19a4y1q7Yz_p109_BV19a4y1q7Yz_p109_m4-dialogue_0164817.mp3 | [
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bilibili_data_22095156_BV19a4y1q7Yz_p109_BV19a4y1q7Yz_p109_m4-dialogue_0164818 | [S1] No spiritual center. [S2] Yeah. [S1] No connection to values, just existing. [S2] Mm-hmm. [S1] And so, I guess it would be for me, this feeling of separateness. | 10.48 | 3.407629 | 24,000 | audio/en/bilibili_data_22095156_BV19a4y1q7Yz_p109_BV19a4y1q7Yz_p109_m4-dialogue_0164818.mp3 | [
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bilibili_data_22095156_BV19a4y1q7Yz_p109_BV19a4y1q7Yz_p109_m4-dialogue_0164819 | [S1] Right? Because I can lie to myself that social script is, "I'm fine, I'm fine." [S2] [LAUGHS] [S1] And, you know, I'm in a lot of faith-based communities and the term is like, "I'm blessed." Right? It's like, yeah, you can be blessed and also have a lot going on. [S2] Yeah. [S1] Uh, blessed and lost. So, uh, that ... | 27.68 | 3.408671 | 24,000 | audio/en/bilibili_data_22095156_BV19a4y1q7Yz_p109_BV19a4y1q7Yz_p109_m4-dialogue_0164819.mp3 | [
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bilibili_data_22095156_BV19a4y1q7Yz_p109_BV19a4y1q7Yz_p109_m4-dialogue_0164820 | [S1] Okay. I just want to make sure that you listening to us just got what Dr. Tame had just said to you. I miss myself. [S2] Yeah. [S1] How does somebody who feels like they don't even know who they are, like you hear that a lot, "I don't even know who I am anymore." [S2] Yes. Yeah. So I like to say, even if you feel ... | 29.32 | 3.431937 | 24,000 | audio/en/bilibili_data_22095156_BV19a4y1q7Yz_p109_BV19a4y1q7Yz_p109_m4-dialogue_0164820.mp3 | [
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bilibili_data_22095156_BV19a4y1q7Yz_p109_BV19a4y1q7Yz_p109_m4-dialogue_0164821 | [S1] connect with the truth of who you are. And so even if you have never met you, you can come home to you. And that's kind of the good news of this process. [S2] Wow. There's a West African, uh, fable- [S1] Yeah. [S2] ... that you tell at the very beginning of the book- [S1] Yes. [S2] ... that I think will give us a ... | 28.84 | 3.403569 | 24,000 | audio/en/bilibili_data_22095156_BV19a4y1q7Yz_p109_BV19a4y1q7Yz_p109_m4-dialogue_0164821.mp3 | [
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bilibili_data_22095156_BV19a4y1q7Yz_p109_BV19a4y1q7Yz_p109_m4-dialogue_0164822 | [S1] Oh, I, I... [S2] What is it? Is it a fable? What are you... [S1] Yeah, you can say it's a, a fable. I, um, I lived in Liberia, West Africa for high school, so I'm gonna do it in my version of Liberian English, but any Liberians who are listening will tell you... [S2] [LAUGHS] [S1] ... uh, that's not the for true. ... | 26.88 | 3.369128 | 24,000 | audio/en/bilibili_data_22095156_BV19a4y1q7Yz_p109_BV19a4y1q7Yz_p109_m4-dialogue_0164822.mp3 | [
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bilibili_data_22095156_BV19a4y1q7Yz_p109_BV19a4y1q7Yz_p109_m4-dialogue_0164823 | [S1] Mm. He said, "What are Eagle doing with these chickens?" He go to the front of the farm and he say, "Bop, bop." You people say knock, knock. [S2] [LAUGHS] [S1] The real sound, that's bop, bop. [S2] [LAUGHS] [S1] He say, "Bop, bop." The man inside say, "Who that?" The man outside say, "That me. You may open the doo... | 29.12 | 2.894562 | 24,000 | audio/en/bilibili_data_22095156_BV19a4y1q7Yz_p109_BV19a4y1q7Yz_p109_m4-dialogue_0164823.mp3 | [
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bilibili_data_22095156_BV19a4y1q7Yz_p109_BV19a4y1q7Yz_p109_m4-dialogue_0164824 | [S1] Oh, I just got to do that right now. Oh my gosh. That, that is why this book is required reading for everyone. This is why you wrote the book. In fact, I would love for you to read this part. [S2] Right here, up to there. [S1] Oh, sure. | 21 | 3.078431 | 24,000 | audio/en/bilibili_data_22095156_BV19a4y1q7Yz_p109_BV19a4y1q7Yz_p109_m4-dialogue_0164824.mp3 | [
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bilibili_data_22095156_BV19a4y1q7Yz_p109_BV19a4y1q7Yz_p109_m4-dialogue_0164825 | [S1] Beautiful. [S2] Thank you. [S1] Thank you. [S2] Mm. And it has been such a gift being able to get this out to people because so many of us are hungry for more. Like you have the sense, "This can't be it." [S1] Mm. [S2] Right? Like this- [S1] Mm-hmm. [S2] This just can't be it, right? In whatever area of my life. A... | 27.72 | 3.252689 | 24,000 | audio/en/bilibili_data_22095156_BV19a4y1q7Yz_p109_BV19a4y1q7Yz_p109_m4-dialogue_0164825.mp3 | [
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bilibili_data_22095156_BV19a4y1q7Yz_p109_BV19a4y1q7Yz_p109_m4-dialogue_0164826 | [S1] How do we start? Like what, where is the beginning step to your own homecoming? [S2] I start every session with the breath. [S1] Okay. [S2] Because we're so busy and scattered and we have been tricked, duped, hoodwinked into believing I can prove my worthiness with my busyness. | 24.72 | 3.450389 | 24,000 | audio/en/bilibili_data_22095156_BV19a4y1q7Yz_p109_BV19a4y1q7Yz_p109_m4-dialogue_0164826.mp3 | [
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bilibili_data_22095156_BV19a4y1q7Yz_p109_BV19a4y1q7Yz_p109_m4-dialogue_0164827 | [S1] And so people can come in, you know, running a million miles and have believed themselves that if I'm so productive, I must be at home. [S2] Mm. [S1] But we often are not. And so I invite people to take a moment to tune into their breath, to inhale in through the nose, and exhale out through the mouth. | 26.72 | 3.191317 | 24,000 | audio/en/bilibili_data_22095156_BV19a4y1q7Yz_p109_BV19a4y1q7Yz_p109_m4-dialogue_0164827.mp3 | [
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bilibili_data_22095156_BV19a4y1q7Yz_p109_BV19a4y1q7Yz_p109_m4-dialogue_0164828 | [S1] Um, I just noticed that my mind went quiet. [S2] Mm-hmm. [S1] And I dropped out of my head. [S2] Yeah. [S1] And into my body. [S2] That's it. [S1] And there was a slowing. [S2] Mm-hmm. [S1] That kinda went with this knowing. [S2] Right. [S1] That this feels better than the thoughts that are racing or the things th... | 27 | 3.387323 | 24,000 | audio/en/bilibili_data_22095156_BV19a4y1q7Yz_p109_BV19a4y1q7Yz_p109_m4-dialogue_0164828.mp3 | [
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bilibili_data_22095156_BV19a4y1q7Yz_p109_BV19a4y1q7Yz_p109_m4-dialogue_0164829 | [S1] Right. It is the, uh, the homecoming that I, and that's a part of the closing our eyes or lowering our gaze, is when we're, uh, open, we're open to all the stimulation around us. [S2] Mm-hmm. [S1] And especially if you're, uh, a, a trauma survivor, you are tuned into other people, right? So what are they thinking?... | 29.04 | 3.370448 | 24,000 | audio/en/bilibili_data_22095156_BV19a4y1q7Yz_p109_BV19a4y1q7Yz_p109_m4-dialogue_0164829.mp3 | [
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bilibili_data_22095156_BV19a4y1q7Yz_p109_BV19a4y1q7Yz_p109_m4-dialogue_0164830 | [S1] ... and violence. [S2] Yeah. Then truth shows up, right? And many of us suppress and run and hide. And so, then that heightens the belief that I can't see myself. [S1] Mm. [S2] Right? And so, that keeps us running. So, instead, to give | 20 | 3.345732 | 24,000 | audio/en/bilibili_data_22095156_BV19a4y1q7Yz_p109_BV19a4y1q7Yz_p109_m4-dialogue_0164830.mp3 | [
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bilibili_data_22095156_BV19a4y1q7Yz_p109_BV19a4y1q7Yz_p109_m4-dialogue_0164831 | [S1] So if homecoming means coming back home and feeling connected. [S2] Yeah. [S1] To your most authentic self, to recognizing the eagle. [S2] Yes. [S1] That is in there. [S2] Yes. [S1] And ignoring what everybody said and all the stuff around you that makes you chicken, makes you feel like a chicken. What are the sig... | 21 | 3.477259 | 24,000 | audio/en/bilibili_data_22095156_BV19a4y1q7Yz_p109_BV19a4y1q7Yz_p109_m4-dialogue_0164831.mp3 | [
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bilibili_data_22095156_BV19a4y1q7Yz_p109_BV19a4y1q7Yz_p109_m4-dialogue_0164832 | [S1] So when we are in a place of feeling powerless, hopelessness, uh, despair, those are indicators that we have lost sight of our power and voice. [S2] Mm-hmm. [S1] 'Cause the truth is we do have capacity, voice, and agency, but we've been in environments where that wasn't welcomed or that wasn't responded to, and so... | 24.36 | 3.460061 | 24,000 | audio/en/bilibili_data_22095156_BV19a4y1q7Yz_p109_BV19a4y1q7Yz_p109_m4-dialogue_0164832.mp3 | [
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bilibili_data_22095156_BV19a4y1q7Yz_p109_BV19a4y1q7Yz_p109_m4-dialogue_0164833 | [S1] But I know attitude is despair. But, uh- [S2] Hold on a second. [S1] Uh-huh. [S2] Attitude is despair? [S1] Yeah. So a form of depression people often don't recognize is irritable depression. | 14.08 | 3.559175 | 24,000 | audio/en/bilibili_data_22095156_BV19a4y1q7Yz_p109_BV19a4y1q7Yz_p109_m4-dialogue_0164833.mp3 | [
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bilibili_data_22095156_BV19a4y1q7Yz_p109_BV19a4y1q7Yz_p109_m4-dialogue_0164834 | [S1] Right? Yeah. [S2] Wow. [S1] And, and people don't respond to compassion with compassion to women with a quote unquote bad attitude. But if we said when I see that woman, she's in despair, maybe then I would respond with compassion. [S2] Mm-hmm. [S1] But some of us, by family, by culture, by religion, we're taught ... | 29.04 | 3.461859 | 24,000 | audio/en/bilibili_data_22095156_BV19a4y1q7Yz_p109_BV19a4y1q7Yz_p109_m4-dialogue_0164834.mp3 | [
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bilibili_data_22095156_BV19a4y1q7Yz_p109_BV19a4y1q7Yz_p109_m4-dialogue_0164835 | [S1] Right. But underneath it is the despair. [S2] It's so true. [S1] Yeah. [S2] It's like an iceberg. You see the anger on the top, but there's something so much deeper going on. [S1] So much deeper underneath. [S2] Wow. [S1] Yeah. [S2] So you could pick up on the attitude and the | 15.16 | 3.374718 | 24,000 | audio/en/bilibili_data_22095156_BV19a4y1q7Yz_p109_BV19a4y1q7Yz_p109_m4-dialogue_0164835.mp3 | [
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bilibili_data_22095156_BV19a4y1q7Yz_p109_BV19a4y1q7Yz_p109_m4-dialogue_0164836 | [S1] ... energy. [S2] Mm-hmm. But I know there's the story there. [S1] Yeah. [S2] Right? Especially because when you know you haven't done anything, right? [S1] Mm-hmm. [S2] So I am, I am on, feeling on the receiving end of your upset and I haven't done anything so that I know there's a story. [S1] Yeah. [S2] So, you k... | 28.92 | 3.32595 | 24,000 | audio/en/bilibili_data_22095156_BV19a4y1q7Yz_p109_BV19a4y1q7Yz_p109_m4-dialogue_0164836.mp3 | [
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bilibili_data_22095156_BV19a4y1q7Yz_p109_BV19a4y1q7Yz_p109_m4-dialogue_0164837 | [S1] And I say, look, I just gave a whole keynote on it, right? [S2] [LAUGHS] [S1] I say, yes. And she says, "Well, you don't look like any survivor I've ever known." So the doubting can be triggering as we think about not being believed. [S2] Mm-hmm. [S1] But then I go deeper than that, uh, and decide not to get defen... | 21.84 | 3.17419 | 24,000 | audio/en/bilibili_data_22095156_BV19a4y1q7Yz_p109_BV19a4y1q7Yz_p109_m4-dialogue_0164837.mp3 | [
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bilibili_data_22095156_BV19a4y1q7Yz_p109_BV19a4y1q7Yz_p109_m4-dialogue_0164838 | [S1] Instead, I just let her question/statement hang in the air, and I just, uh, what I would say, soften. [S2] Hmm. [S1] Right? I soften, and I just look at her, and it's like, now she can see me. Like, on the stage, with my PowerPoint and my pantsuit, she couldn't, she couldn't see me. | 23.52 | 3.352605 | 24,000 | audio/en/bilibili_data_22095156_BV19a4y1q7Yz_p109_BV19a4y1q7Yz_p109_m4-dialogue_0164838.mp3 | [
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bilibili_data_22095156_BV19a4y1q7Yz_p109_BV19a4y1q7Yz_p109_m4-dialogue_0164839 | [S1] Right? She could only see the strength and the, uh, oratorical skills. [S2] Yeah. [S1] But now standing in front of her, kind of woman to woman, she could see, uh, the vulnerability. [S2] Mm-hmm. [S1] And seeing the vulnerability, she said, "You know, the only survivors I've ever known were, uh, fat and, uh, poor ... | 29.12 | 3.368868 | 24,000 | audio/en/bilibili_data_22095156_BV19a4y1q7Yz_p109_BV19a4y1q7Yz_p109_m4-dialogue_0164839.mp3 | [
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bilibili_data_22095156_BV19a4y1q7Yz_p109_BV19a4y1q7Yz_p109_m4-dialogue_0164840 | [S1] And when you are excellent, people don't notice your wounds. [S2] Hmm. [S1] And sometimes you don't notice them. You feel you've outrun it. [S2] Yes. [S1] But it's there. Late at night, early in the morning, when you're in certain environments, it shows up that it's still bleeding and you've just gotten busy but n... | 29.12 | 3.01679 | 24,000 | audio/en/bilibili_data_22095156_BV19a4y1q7Yz_p109_BV19a4y1q7Yz_p109_m4-dialogue_0164840.mp3 | [
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bilibili_data_22095156_BV19a4y1q7Yz_p109_BV19a4y1q7Yz_p109_m4-dialogue_0164841 | [S1] I'm gonna, I'm gonna come, I'm gonna give you her name later. [S2] [LAUGHS] [S1] But she has a beautiful quote I love, which is, uh, "I don't want to be driven, I want to be called." | 12.88 | 3.397125 | 24,000 | audio/en/bilibili_data_22095156_BV19a4y1q7Yz_p109_BV19a4y1q7Yz_p109_m4-dialogue_0164841.mp3 | [
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bilibili_data_22095156_BV19a4y1q7Yz_p109_BV19a4y1q7Yz_p109_m4-dialogue_0164842 | [S1] And this idea of like when you're driven, your trauma can drive you. [S2] Yeah. [S1] Like your insecurity can, you know, where you have to constantly prove yourself and it's this franticness versus when I'm at home, then I can be in flow with what is me. Yeah. [S2] Wow. Um, if you have somebody in your life who ha... | 28.16 | 3.42391 | 24,000 | audio/en/bilibili_data_22095156_BV19a4y1q7Yz_p109_BV19a4y1q7Yz_p109_m4-dialogue_0164842.mp3 | [
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bilibili_data_22095156_BV19a4y1q7Yz_p109_BV19a4y1q7Yz_p109_m4-dialogue_0164843 | [S1] How do you practice softening and compassion? Because oftentimes if you're around somebody who's constantly irritable, who is always angry about or frustrated with something, I have several people that come to mind right now in my own life. [S2] Yeah. [S1] What are some, some tools that we can use to practice more... | 29.12 | 3.42602 | 24,000 | audio/en/bilibili_data_22095156_BV19a4y1q7Yz_p109_BV19a4y1q7Yz_p109_m4-dialogue_0164843.mp3 | [
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bilibili_data_22095156_BV19a4y1q7Yz_p109_BV19a4y1q7Yz_p109_m4-dialogue_0164844 | [S1] ... reactive. [S2] Right. And I love that question because I think what we often get pulled into is being combative with them. [S1] Mm-hmm. [S2] And they're always gonna out-combat us. [S1] [LAUGHS] [S2] [LAUGHS] Because they're in warrior mode, right? [S1] Right. [S2] And so, uh, you know, when they come with the... | 25.6 | 3.325165 | 24,000 | audio/en/bilibili_data_22095156_BV19a4y1q7Yz_p109_BV19a4y1q7Yz_p109_m4-dialogue_0164844.mp3 | [
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bilibili_data_22095156_BV19a4y1q7Yz_p109_BV19a4y1q7Yz_p109_m4-dialogue_0164845 | [S1] ... Transparency is contagious. [S2] Mm. [S1] And sometimes then people say, "Oh, me too." Right? [S2] Right. [S1] And I'm like, "Yeah, you too. [S2] Yeah. [S1] Yeah, you too." [S2] [LAUGHS] [S1] Uh, so the testimonial or if I know anything that's been happening in their life, to name that. | 17.68 | 2.88249 | 24,000 | audio/en/bilibili_data_22095156_BV19a4y1q7Yz_p109_BV19a4y1q7Yz_p109_m4-dialogue_0164845.mp3 | [
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bilibili_data_22095156_BV19a4y1q7Yz_p109_BV19a4y1q7Yz_p109_m4-dialogue_0164846 | [S1] ... to say, 'cause they're responding with all this intensity about distraction. [S2] Right. [S1] So then I will say, um, "Well, I really wanted to check in 'cause I know this is such a busy time with you," you know, "that you're moving, that you're this, that you're that." And for us to ask a deeper question beca... | 21.72 | 3.444943 | 24,000 | audio/en/bilibili_data_22095156_BV19a4y1q7Yz_p109_BV19a4y1q7Yz_p109_m4-dialogue_0164846.mp3 | [
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bilibili_data_22095156_BV19a4y1q7Yz_p109_BV19a4y1q7Yz_p109_m4-dialogue_0164847 | [S1] Yeah. [S2] Right? So break out of the script. And so, instead, with everything you're holding, you know, what's been helping you to manage, right? Or what do you need? Or how can I help? [S1] Yeah. [S2] Um, so I'm speaking to the unspoken. | 15.76 | 3.355515 | 24,000 | audio/en/bilibili_data_22095156_BV19a4y1q7Yz_p109_BV19a4y1q7Yz_p109_m4-dialogue_0164847.mp3 | [
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bilibili_data_22095156_BV19a4y1q7Yz_p109_BV19a4y1q7Yz_p109_m4-dialogue_0164848 | [S1] If you bring in the chicken and the eagle, can we use that, that fable to describe that moment where the survivor in the audience has this irritable, depressive moment with you? [S2] Right. [S1] What is happening for her in your opinion as a psychologist? [S2] Yeah. So I like to say | 24.84 | 3.390865 | 24,000 | audio/en/bilibili_data_22095156_BV19a4y1q7Yz_p109_BV19a4y1q7Yz_p109_m4-dialogue_0164848.mp3 | [
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bilibili_data_22095156_BV19a4y1q7Yz_p109_BV19a4y1q7Yz_p109_m4-dialogue_0164849 | [S1] The reason you feel unsettled is because you're not supposed to settle. [S2] Say that again. [S1] The reason you feel unsettled is because you're not supposed to settle. So what area of your life are you settling? [S2] And I would imagine that any area where you feel unsettled- [S1] Mm-hmm. | 24.92 | 2.924992 | 24,000 | audio/en/bilibili_data_22095156_BV19a4y1q7Yz_p109_BV19a4y1q7Yz_p109_m4-dialogue_0164849.mp3 | [
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bilibili_data_22095156_BV19a4y1q7Yz_p109_BV19a4y1q7Yz_p109_m4-dialogue_0164850 | [S1] Right. There it is. [S2] There it is. [S1] So, you know, what happens is often we are focused so much, uh, outwardly, if only. If only my spouse would do this, if only my kids would do this, if only my supervisor would do this. Um, and in this moment, we don't have the capacity to shift them. So how might you want... | 29.28 | 3.253779 | 24,000 | audio/en/bilibili_data_22095156_BV19a4y1q7Yz_p109_BV19a4y1q7Yz_p109_m4-dialogue_0164850.mp3 | [
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bilibili_data_22095156_BV19a4y1q7Yz_p109_BV19a4y1q7Yz_p109_m4-dialogue_0164851 | [S1] ... surrounding you. [S2] Yes. And frustrating, and annoying, and- [S1] Yes. Yes. [S2] ... and draining, but it also, uh, lets me off the hook because I can keep waiting for their homecoming, right? I can come home to myself when they come home to themselves. Well, everybody is on their own timing, and what I like... | 23.64 | 3.286598 | 24,000 | audio/en/bilibili_data_22095156_BV19a4y1q7Yz_p109_BV19a4y1q7Yz_p109_m4-dialogue_0164851.mp3 | [
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bilibili_data_22095156_BV19a4y1q7Yz_p109_BV19a4y1q7Yz_p109_m4-dialogue_0164852 | [S1] is I don't want to be, I don't want to keep my healing hostage waiting for the healing of those who harmed me. [S2] Oh. Wow. [S1] Mm-hmm. And that's what we're doing when we're like waiting for the apology. [S2] Yeah. [S1] It's like I can't heal 'til you see what you did to me. | 18.08 | 3.134639 | 24,000 | audio/en/bilibili_data_22095156_BV19a4y1q7Yz_p109_BV19a4y1q7Yz_p109_m4-dialogue_0164852.mp3 | [
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bilibili_data_22095156_BV19a4y1q7Yz_p109_BV19a4y1q7Yz_p109_m4-dialogue_0164853 | [S1] Like, that could be years. [S2] It might be your whole lifetime. [S1] Yeah, it may be your whole life, right? They have gone on with their lives. They don't care. They're not thinking about it. And so I want to take my healing out of their hands. | 13.64 | 3.173035 | 24,000 | audio/en/bilibili_data_22095156_BV19a4y1q7Yz_p109_BV19a4y1q7Yz_p109_m4-dialogue_0164853.mp3 | [
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bilibili_data_22095156_BV19a4y1q7Yz_p109_BV19a4y1q7Yz_p109_m4-dialogue_0164854 | [S1] Mm. [S2] And give it back to yourself. [S1] Yeah. [S2] And so the process of coming home and the homecoming is the act of self-healing. [S1] Yes. Yes. [S2] It's about joining back in with yourself. [S1] Mm-hmm. [S2] You know, because we have such a huge international audience and | 16.92 | 3.470572 | 24,000 | audio/en/bilibili_data_22095156_BV19a4y1q7Yz_p109_BV19a4y1q7Yz_p109_m4-dialogue_0164854.mp3 | [
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bilibili_data_22095156_BV19a4y1q7Yz_p109_BV19a4y1q7Yz_p109_m4-dialogue_0164855 | [S1] ... therapy can be very expensive. [S2] Mm-hmm. [S1] I would love for you to, um, read these six questions that you often ask patients- [S2] Yeah. [S1] ... that can be a sign of what you call psychological homelessness. [S2] Mm-hmm. [S1] And so, I would also love for you, Dr. Tama, to talk about what is psychologi... | 27.04 | 3.442059 | 24,000 | audio/en/bilibili_data_22095156_BV19a4y1q7Yz_p109_BV19a4y1q7Yz_p109_m4-dialogue_0164855.mp3 | [
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bilibili_data_22095156_BV19a4y1q7Yz_p109_BV19a4y1q7Yz_p109_m4-dialogue_0164856 | [S1] ... then they're my compass. But I need a compass. [S2] Mm-hmm. [S1] 'Cause that's what we talk about with therapy, is at some point, people need to internalize it. So it's not just every week, people coming and saying, "So, Tama, what do you think?" [S2] Yeah. [S1] Right? They have to get to the point where I was... | 27.32 | 3.444564 | 24,000 | audio/en/bilibili_data_22095156_BV19a4y1q7Yz_p109_BV19a4y1q7Yz_p109_m4-dialogue_0164856.mp3 | [
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bilibili_data_22095156_BV19a4y1q7Yz_p109_BV19a4y1q7Yz_p109_m4-dialogue_0164857 | [S1] You've taken the first step, which is awareness. Because I can't come home to myself if I don't realize I'm wandering. [S2] Yeah. [S1] Right? Sometimes we don't realize it. You can, time is passing and you don't know it. [S2] Mm-hmm. [S1] So, the fact that in this moment, as you're listening, you chose to tell you... | 19.56 | 3.321897 | 24,000 | audio/en/bilibili_data_22095156_BV19a4y1q7Yz_p109_BV19a4y1q7Yz_p109_m4-dialogue_0164857.mp3 | [
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bilibili_data_22095156_BV19a4y1q7Yz_p109_BV19a4y1q7Yz_p109_m4-dialogue_0164858 | [S1] feel good about ourselves, uh, we neglect ourselves and we erase ourselves. And that those can have cultural messages and gender messages and religious messages where people will say self-care is selfish. [S2] Right. [S1] You know? And so to say, uh, to myself, I am not just a tool for other people's nourishing. | 26.48 | 3.435837 | 24,000 | audio/en/bilibili_data_22095156_BV19a4y1q7Yz_p109_BV19a4y1q7Yz_p109_m4-dialogue_0164858.mp3 | [
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bilibili_data_22095156_BV19a4y1q7Yz_p109_BV19a4y1q7Yz_p109_m4-dialogue_0164859 | [S1] ... to begin to care for ourselves. And the catch is, when we talk about behavioral psychology, with behavioral psychology, you start to do the action even if you don't feel it yet. [S2] Mm-hmm. [S1] Right? [S2] Mm-hmm. [S1] So if I say, like, I'm gonna wait till I have high self-esteem and then take good care of ... | 23.6 | 3.427456 | 24,000 | audio/en/bilibili_data_22095156_BV19a4y1q7Yz_p109_BV19a4y1q7Yz_p109_m4-dialogue_0164859.mp3 | [
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bilibili_data_22095156_BV19a4y1q7Yz_p109_BV19a4y1q7Yz_p109_m4-dialogue_0164860 | [S1] That is definitely a code word and the name came back to me of the life coach I quoted. So I just want to give- [S2] Sure. [S1] Shannon Yvette. [S2] Okay. [S1] Is the one who- [S2] Right. [S1] ... who gave the quote I said earlier. But, uh, when people don't have a sense of their purpose, uh, that's a, an indicati... | 26.64 | 3.270104 | 24,000 | audio/en/bilibili_data_22095156_BV19a4y1q7Yz_p109_BV19a4y1q7Yz_p109_m4-dialogue_0164860.mp3 | [
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bilibili_data_22095156_BV19a4y1q7Yz_p109_BV19a4y1q7Yz_p109_m4-dialogue_0164861 | [S1] In order to survive those, you have to disconnect. [S2] Mm. [S1] It's impossible to be at home with yourself and stay in relationship with someone who is dishonoring you perpetually. [S2] Wow. [S1] Yeah. [S2] So for somebody that just had like, pew. [S1] Yes. [S2] A wake up call. [S1] Mm-hmm. | 22.36 | 3.397402 | 24,000 | audio/en/bilibili_data_22095156_BV19a4y1q7Yz_p109_BV19a4y1q7Yz_p109_m4-dialogue_0164861.mp3 | [
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bilibili_data_22095156_BV19a4y1q7Yz_p109_BV19a4y1q7Yz_p109_m4-dialogue_0164862 | [S1] Then you can have compassion for yourself because people will judge you and say, like, why'd you stay so long? [S2] Right. [S1] But you weren't connected to you. You had been disconnected from yourself so you don't even feel the capacity to dream again, to imagine, to believe that better is possible for you and th... | 25.16 | 3.233285 | 24,000 | audio/en/bilibili_data_22095156_BV19a4y1q7Yz_p109_BV19a4y1q7Yz_p109_m4-dialogue_0164862.mp3 | [
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bilibili_data_22095156_BV19a4y1q7Yz_p109_BV19a4y1q7Yz_p109_m4-dialogue_0164863 | [S1] I, we see this both in relationships and jobs all the time. [S2] All the time. [S1] In fact, we have a whole chapter about how to handle a toxic work environment. [S2] That's right. [S1] So if somebody is listening to this and they're on their way in- [S2] Mm-hmm. [S1] ... to a job that is slowly just draining the... | 19.44 | 3.467 | 24,000 | audio/en/bilibili_data_22095156_BV19a4y1q7Yz_p109_BV19a4y1q7Yz_p109_m4-dialogue_0164863.mp3 | [
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bilibili_data_22095156_BV19a4y1q7Yz_p109_BV19a4y1q7Yz_p109_m4-dialogue_0164864 | [S1] acknowledge it. [S2] Yeah. [S1] And to recognize that you're disconnected from yourself and you already gave us the way that you would know. [S2] Right. [S1] Any area that you are unsettled in. [S2] Mm-hmm. [S1] That does not feel cohesive. [S2] Yeah. [S1] That is where you're settling. That is a point of disconne... | 27.96 | 3.414011 | 24,000 | audio/en/bilibili_data_22095156_BV19a4y1q7Yz_p109_BV19a4y1q7Yz_p109_m4-dialogue_0164864.mp3 | [
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bilibili_data_22095156_BV19a4y1q7Yz_p109_BV19a4y1q7Yz_p109_m4-dialogue_0164865 | [S1] Yeah. So self-care is nourishing every part of yourself. So there is the physical part. [S2] Mm-hmm. [S1] Uh, so it is hard to heal and come home to yourself if you're living out of vending machines and drive-through windows. [S2] Why? [S1] Because your food affects your mood, and there's nothing life-giving in fa... | 23.44 | 3.471316 | 24,000 | audio/en/bilibili_data_22095156_BV19a4y1q7Yz_p109_BV19a4y1q7Yz_p109_m4-dialogue_0164865.mp3 | [
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bilibili_data_22095156_BV19a4y1q7Yz_p109_BV19a4y1q7Yz_p109_m4-dialogue_0164866 | [S1] So to have to flip it, and of course in moderation, 'cause when people hear that, they're like, "Do you mean I can never have?" [S2] [LAUGHS] [S1] Right? So in my, and drinking water instead of all the soda. Sleep is a big one. It is hard to come home to yourself when you're exhausted. You know, we are busy, busy, | 19.56 | 3.168068 | 24,000 | audio/en/bilibili_data_22095156_BV19a4y1q7Yz_p109_BV19a4y1q7Yz_p109_m4-dialogue_0164866.mp3 | [
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bilibili_data_22095156_BV19a4y1q7Yz_p109_BV19a4y1q7Yz_p109_m4-dialogue_0164867 | Uh, and then all night people are, uh, on their phones or, you know, up and can't sleep. And I say, if your idea, and, and hopefully this is okay to say. [S1] You can say whatever you want. [S2] Okay. Yes. If your idea of relaxing before you go to sleep is watching three episodes of Law & Order, I would encourage you t... | 25.08 | 3.324832 | 24,000 | audio/en/bilibili_data_22095156_BV19a4y1q7Yz_p109_BV19a4y1q7Yz_p109_m4-dialogue_0164867.mp3 | [
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bilibili_data_22095156_BV19a4y1q7Yz_p109_BV19a4y1q7Yz_p109_m4-dialogue_0164868 | [S1] That's what it is. I mean, it's ha, harm, crime, violation, attacks, and that's what is gonna soothe me into my bedtime. [S2] So what is the answer- [S1] Yeah. [S2] ... that a lot of people give you when they do go into therapy about that connection? | 17.32 | 3.345485 | 24,000 | audio/en/bilibili_data_22095156_BV19a4y1q7Yz_p109_BV19a4y1q7Yz_p109_m4-dialogue_0164868.mp3 | [
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bilibili_data_22095156_BV19a4y1q7Yz_p109_BV19a4y1q7Yz_p109_m4-dialogue_0164869 | [S1] ... connection. [S2] Is that it's normal and familiar. Some of us grew up in high stress, so we think calmness is either fake or boring. [S1] Wow. [S2] Right? People mistake peace for boring. [S1] [LAUGHS] [S2] And it's like, to come home to yourself, you have to lean into the discomfort 'cause it's, because it's ... | 28.8 | 3.251074 | 24,000 | audio/en/bilibili_data_22095156_BV19a4y1q7Yz_p109_BV19a4y1q7Yz_p109_m4-dialogue_0164869.mp3 | [
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bilibili_data_22095156_BV19a4y1q7Yz_p109_BV19a4y1q7Yz_p109_m4-dialogue_0164870 | [S1] It is amazing how many people don't tell the people that they love that they don't, that they love them. [S2] Right. [S1] And it hadn't occurred to me it's because they never were told that themselves. [S2] Yeah. [S1] And that it might feel forced or not authentic. [S2] Yeah. | 20.32 | 3.395989 | 24,000 | audio/en/bilibili_data_22095156_BV19a4y1q7Yz_p109_BV19a4y1q7Yz_p109_m4-dialogue_0164870.mp3 | [
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bilibili_data_22095156_BV19a4y1q7Yz_p109_BV19a4y1q7Yz_p109_m4-dialogue_0164871 | [S1] Yes. [S2] Whoa. [S1] Yeah. And that's the importance of us learning the, each other's love languages because, you know, her response was the response of probably many of her generation, which was you have food on the table or you have a roof over your head. [S2] Yes. | 16.6 | 3.362982 | 24,000 | audio/en/bilibili_data_22095156_BV19a4y1q7Yz_p109_BV19a4y1q7Yz_p109_m4-dialogue_0164871.mp3 | [
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bilibili_data_22095156_BV19a4y1q7Yz_p109_BV19a4y1q7Yz_p109_m4-dialogue_0164872 | [S1] That's right. So unfortunately, many people who are in the mental health field did not get trained to incorporate spirituality. [S2] Mm. [S1] And so, uh, there's research that shows on average, mental health professionals endorse a lower level of spirituality or religiosity than the general public. [S2] Really? [S... | 21.8 | 3.548347 | 24,000 | audio/en/bilibili_data_22095156_BV19a4y1q7Yz_p109_BV19a4y1q7Yz_p109_m4-dialogue_0164872.mp3 | [
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bilibili_data_22095156_BV19a4y1q7Yz_p109_BV19a4y1q7Yz_p109_m4-dialogue_0164874 | [S1] to, to manipulate it, right? So it's like it's, it's not concrete. [S2] Mm-hmm. [S1] Right? And so that's, in the field of psychology, the actual, you know, the founders in the field were often people of faith, but then there was this move in the field where we wanted to prove we're a science. [S2] Mm-hmm. [S1] So... | 29.36 | 3.37044 | 24,000 | audio/en/bilibili_data_22095156_BV19a4y1q7Yz_p109_BV19a4y1q7Yz_p109_m4-dialogue_0164874.mp3 | [
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bilibili_data_22095156_BV19a4y1q7Yz_p109_BV19a4y1q7Yz_p109_m4-dialogue_0164875 | [S1] Then there has been a neglect from it, from that area. And then I think the other part of it has been, um, the recognition that some people have been harmed in spiritual spaces. [S2] Mm. [S1] So then some therapists will over-generalize and think that it is all harmful, as opposed to whenever you get people togeth... | 27.36 | 3.360913 | 24,000 | audio/en/bilibili_data_22095156_BV19a4y1q7Yz_p109_BV19a4y1q7Yz_p109_m4-dialogue_0164875.mp3 | [
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bilibili_data_22095156_BV19a4y1q7Yz_p109_BV19a4y1q7Yz_p109_m4-dialogue_0164877 | [S1] Right? If you just used to bad treatment, if people, like, call you back, you're like, "Oh." [S2] Yeah. [S1] Right? They'd call me back. And it's like, "That was nice, but there's more." Right? There's more. [S2] Yes. Yes. So we've kinda started stepping- [S1] Yeah. [S2] ... toward this awareness. How do you combi... | 26.6 | 3.140907 | 24,000 | audio/en/bilibili_data_22095156_BV19a4y1q7Yz_p109_BV19a4y1q7Yz_p109_m4-dialogue_0164877.mp3 | [
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bilibili_data_22095156_BV19a4y1q7Yz_p109_BV19a4y1q7Yz_p109_m4-dialogue_0164878 | [S1] With the work to start to heal, or as you say, repair yourself. [S2] Yeah. [S1] In the phys- | 7.2 | 3.386385 | 24,000 | audio/en/bilibili_data_22095156_BV19a4y1q7Yz_p109_BV19a4y1q7Yz_p109_m4-dialogue_0164878.mp3 | [
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bilibili_data_22095156_BV19a4y1q7Yz_p109_BV19a4y1q7Yz_p109_m4-dialogue_0164879 | [S1] ... space. [S2] That's right. So a part of it is what gives us the motivation to do the work because a lot of times we're operating based on evidence, which is what we've seen. [S1] Mm-hmm. [S2] So if I've only had bad experiences, my parents abandoned me, this person left me, this person mistreated me, if I belie... | 26.68 | 3.352776 | 24,000 | audio/en/bilibili_data_22095156_BV19a4y1q7Yz_p109_BV19a4y1q7Yz_p109_m4-dialogue_0164879.mp3 | [
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bilibili_data_22095156_BV19a4y1q7Yz_p109_BV19a4y1q7Yz_p109_m4-dialogue_0164880 | [S1] I have to have the belief of the more. [S2] How the heck do you do that? [S1] Yes. [S2] When your whole life- [S1] Yeah. [S2] ... you have experienced- [S1] Mm-hmm. | 9.92 | 3.020292 | 24,000 | audio/en/bilibili_data_22095156_BV19a4y1q7Yz_p109_BV19a4y1q7Yz_p109_m4-dialogue_0164880.mp3 | [
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bilibili_data_22095156_BV19a4y1q7Yz_p109_BV19a4y1q7Yz_p109_m4-dialogue_0164881 | [S1] Either abuse or mistreatment or discrimination. [S2] Yes. [S1] Or violence. How do you, when you have evidence that does make you feel unworthy, because I'm sure you get these DMs and these emails all day long, so do we. [S2] Yeah. [S1] Of people who so want to believe that they are worthy, that something is bette... | 29.48 | 3.427377 | 24,000 | audio/en/bilibili_data_22095156_BV19a4y1q7Yz_p109_BV19a4y1q7Yz_p109_m4-dialogue_0164881.mp3 | [
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bilibili_data_22095156_BV19a4y1q7Yz_p109_BV19a4y1q7Yz_p109_m4-dialogue_0164882 | [S1] It's both spiritual and I could argue the case. [S2] Yes. Yes. [S1] But for somebody who is sitting in the disbelief. [S2] Yeah. [S1] How do you cross over. [S2] Right. [S1] To believe. [S2] Yeah. So it's a couple of levels. One of them is to get people to reflect on what do they believe all human beings deserve? ... | 26.64 | 3.452152 | 24,000 | audio/en/bilibili_data_22095156_BV19a4y1q7Yz_p109_BV19a4y1q7Yz_p109_m4-dialogue_0164882.mp3 | [
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bilibili_data_22095156_BV19a4y1q7Yz_p109_BV19a4y1q7Yz_p109_m4-dialogue_0164883 | [S1] Well- [S2] And I believe I'm on the gr- You know what I'm saying? [S1] Yes, yes, yes. [S2] Like we go back to this. How do you possibly convince yourself- [S1] Right. [S2] ... that you could be an eagle if you've never seen one? [S1] Yes, yes. So what we, uh, connect with is disrupting what we call the cognitive d... | 28.28 | 3.441774 | 24,000 | audio/en/bilibili_data_22095156_BV19a4y1q7Yz_p109_BV19a4y1q7Yz_p109_m4-dialogue_0164883.mp3 | [
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bilibili_data_22095156_BV19a4y1q7Yz_p109_BV19a4y1q7Yz_p109_m4-dialogue_0164884 | [S1] So, uh, for people who were molested- [S2] Yes. [S1] ... they either were told directly or indirectly that that is their fault, right? That, um, it's 'cause they developed early or it's because they shouldn't have been over there or whatever it is, that somehow that's on you. And so we have to, uh, demonstrate tha... | 29.48 | 3.306245 | 24,000 | audio/en/bilibili_data_22095156_BV19a4y1q7Yz_p109_BV19a4y1q7Yz_p109_m4-dialogue_0164884.mp3 | [
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bilibili_data_22095156_BV19a4y1q7Yz_p109_BV19a4y1q7Yz_p109_m4-dialogue_0164885 | [S1] Does every girl who develops breast early deserve to be molested? [S2] Of course not. [S1] So you are not an exception to that rule. [S2] Oh. [S1] Yeah. [S2] I see. [S1] Yeah. [S2] I can see another lie because I'm a survivor of, uh, that kind of abuse. [S1] Yeah. [S2] It's the sh- | 27.56 | 3.0741 | 24,000 | audio/en/bilibili_data_22095156_BV19a4y1q7Yz_p109_BV19a4y1q7Yz_p109_m4-dialogue_0164885.mp3 | [
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bilibili_data_22095156_BV19a4y1q7Yz_p109_BV19a4y1q7Yz_p109_m4-dialogue_0164886 | [S1] Don't tell anyone. [S2] Mm-hmm. [S1] Or you'll get in trouble. [S2] Yeah. Yeah. And what I learned about that, uh, I'd say from my own journey is I was taught that keeping quiet kept the peace until I realized whose peace is it keeping? | 24.72 | 3.247084 | 24,000 | audio/en/bilibili_data_22095156_BV19a4y1q7Yz_p109_BV19a4y1q7Yz_p109_m4-dialogue_0164886.mp3 | [
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bilibili_data_22095156_BV19a4y1q7Yz_p109_BV19a4y1q7Yz_p109_m4-dialogue_0164887 | [S1] Oh. [S2] Right. The offenders at peace, the people who don't want to deal with it at peace, and I, in this little body, am holding all of the war. So, I don't want to hold it anymore. [S1] Wow. [S2] Yeah. | 15.4 | 3.044753 | 24,000 | audio/en/bilibili_data_22095156_BV19a4y1q7Yz_p109_BV19a4y1q7Yz_p109_m4-dialogue_0164887.mp3 | [
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bilibili_data_22095156_BV19a4y1q7Yz_p109_BV19a4y1q7Yz_p109_m4-dialogue_0164888 | [S1] You know, this is what we're taught. You're gonna upset things, you're gonna upset people, nobody wants to hear that. And, uh, yeah, there's no peace. [S2] Whose peace are you keeping? [S1] Yeah. [S2] You're making it easy for everybody else. [S1] Mm-hmm. [S2] As it's slowly- [S1] Right. [S2] ... destroying you. [... | 29.48 | 3.438538 | 24,000 | audio/en/bilibili_data_22095156_BV19a4y1q7Yz_p109_BV19a4y1q7Yz_p109_m4-dialogue_0164888.mp3 | [
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bilibili_data_22095156_BV19a4y1q7Yz_p109_BV19a4y1q7Yz_p109_m4-dialogue_0164889 | [S1] How do you counsel people who, in the process of starting to come back home to themselves- [S2] Yeah. [S1] ... to learn to fly- [S2] Mm-hmm. [S1] ... to stop holding the peace for other people around you, how do you counsel people to then go back into their life? [S2] Mm-hmm. [S1] Like you're, let's just say it's ... | 28.24 | 3.477988 | 24,000 | audio/en/bilibili_data_22095156_BV19a4y1q7Yz_p109_BV19a4y1q7Yz_p109_m4-dialogue_0164889.mp3 | [
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bilibili_data_22095156_BV19a4y1q7Yz_p109_BV19a4y1q7Yz_p109_m4-dialogue_0164890 | [S1] There's alcohol or drugs. [S2] Mm-hmm. [S1] You've had the conversation. You've gone around and around and around. [S2] Yeah. [S1] And you're the one that's not saying anything. [S2] Mm-hmm. [S1] So you're keeping the peace for them. [S2] Right. [S1] How do you handle, like, that sort of disruption in your life no... | 25.96 | 3.460059 | 24,000 | audio/en/bilibili_data_22095156_BV19a4y1q7Yz_p109_BV19a4y1q7Yz_p109_m4-dialogue_0164890.mp3 | [
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bilibili_data_22095156_BV19a4y1q7Yz_p109_BV19a4y1q7Yz_p109_m4-dialogue_0164891 | [S1] ... to confront things. [S2] And it's gonna require some losses. And some people are not gonna be happy with the new you. People like the silent you. [S1] Mm-hmm. [S2] They like the compliant you. They like the door-mat you. Who wouldn't like that? [S1] [LAUGHS] [S2] [LAUGHS] Right? So when you start getting some ... | 28.92 | 3.356988 | 24,000 | audio/en/bilibili_data_22095156_BV19a4y1q7Yz_p109_BV19a4y1q7Yz_p109_m4-dialogue_0164891.mp3 | [
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bilibili_data_22095156_BV19a4y1q7Yz_p109_BV19a4y1q7Yz_p109_m4-dialogue_0164892 | [S1] You know, in your new role, you are, um, really wanting to bring access to therapy, to mental health support, to the process of a homecoming for people. [S2] Yeah. [S1] Um, to as many people as possible. So why is therapy, what is therapy and why is it important? | 23.28 | 3.484405 | 24,000 | audio/en/bilibili_data_22095156_BV19a4y1q7Yz_p109_BV19a4y1q7Yz_p109_m4-dialogue_0164892.mp3 | [
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bilibili_data_22095156_BV19a4y1q7Yz_p109_BV19a4y1q7Yz_p109_m4-dialogue_0164894 | [S1] Wow. [S2] Yeah. That's the huge part, especially for those of us who have tendencies toward taking care of people, right? [S1] Yeah. [S2] So then in your other relationships, you'll say, "I don't want to burden people," or, "I know they have a lot going on, so let me just pour into them." Well, this is the space w... | 22.88 | 3.389443 | 24,000 | audio/en/bilibili_data_22095156_BV19a4y1q7Yz_p109_BV19a4y1q7Yz_p109_m4-dialogue_0164894.mp3 | [
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bilibili_data_22095156_BV19a4y1q7Yz_p109_BV19a4y1q7Yz_p109_m4-dialogue_0164895 | [S1] You know, I tell my clients, "I'm good." [S2] [LAUGHS] [S1] I, I, I have spaces outside of here that are for me, so you don't have to worry. I, I have the capacity to hold it. And, and that's what we need. [S2] And you also have the tools- [S1] Yes. [S2] ... to help us recognize- [S1] Right. [S2] ... and call ours... | 29.4 | 3.449826 | 24,000 | audio/en/bilibili_data_22095156_BV19a4y1q7Yz_p109_BV19a4y1q7Yz_p109_m4-dialogue_0164895.mp3 | [
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bilibili_data_22095156_BV19a4y1q7Yz_p109_BV19a4y1q7Yz_p109_m4-dialogue_0164898 | [S1] ... for us, given the history, and how do we support each other- [S2] Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. [S1] ... and have patience with each other. And I want to name, as we're talking about people, is not only self-care, but community care. [S2] Let's talk about that. What does that even mean? [S1] Yeah. So we heal in relationship... | 28.52 | 3.307349 | 24,000 | audio/en/bilibili_data_22095156_BV19a4y1q7Yz_p109_BV19a4y1q7Yz_p109_m4-dialogue_0164898.mp3 | [
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bilibili_data_22095156_BV19a4y1q7Yz_p109_BV19a4y1q7Yz_p109_m4-dialogue_0164899 | [S1] Right? That people still choose you. That people, uh, that you feel seen and heard and supported. Uh, there's emotional social support, which is like someone I can cry with. [S2] Yeah. [S1] Someone I can share my good news with. Someone who I can vent to. Uh, but then there's also instrumental social support. Are ... | 29.88 | 3.453395 | 24,000 | audio/en/bilibili_data_22095156_BV19a4y1q7Yz_p109_BV19a4y1q7Yz_p109_m4-dialogue_0164899.mp3 | [
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bilibili_data_22095156_BV19a4y1q7Yz_p109_BV19a4y1q7Yz_p109_m4-dialogue_0164900 | [S1] ... tears, but they can help you find a job, right? So that's another type of support. [S2] Yeah. For, I'm, I'm surprised and saddened by the number of people that will reach out when they hear you say that. [S1] Yeah. [S2] And say, "I have no one." | 14.36 | 3.413858 | 24,000 | audio/en/bilibili_data_22095156_BV19a4y1q7Yz_p109_BV19a4y1q7Yz_p109_m4-dialogue_0164900.mp3 | [
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bilibili_data_22095156_BV19a4y1q7Yz_p109_BV19a4y1q7Yz_p109_m4-dialogue_0164902 | [S1] And the first get there buy in, can we say that that's a goal for you, is to make friends. And so then we have to think about where are we gonna get these friends? Sometimes it's brand new people. Um, so it may be you sign up for a cooking class or you join a book club or you join a political organization or your ... | 29.92 | 3.378365 | 24,000 | audio/en/bilibili_data_22095156_BV19a4y1q7Yz_p109_BV19a4y1q7Yz_p109_m4-dialogue_0164902.mp3 | [
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bilibili_data_22095156_BV19a4y1q7Yz_p109_BV19a4y1q7Yz_p109_m4-dialogue_0164904 | [S1] Wow. And what about, you talk, we just touched on this, and I know so many people do not like what they do for a living. [S2] Yeah. [S1] And in the book, you write about having a job that was very toxic. [S2] Mm-hmm. [S1] Can you describe what it felt like to walk into work and how you practice a homecoming- [S2] ... | 20.4 | 3.42083 | 24,000 | audio/en/bilibili_data_22095156_BV19a4y1q7Yz_p109_BV19a4y1q7Yz_p109_m4-dialogue_0164904.mp3 | [
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bilibili_data_22095156_BV19a4y1q7Yz_p109_BV19a4y1q7Yz_p109_m4-dialogue_0164907 | [S1] Okay, what does that mean? [S2] That means don't set your alarm for the time you have to jump out of bed and jump in the shower, 'cause now you've already started your day frantic. [S1] Yes. [S2] So now I'm going into a toxic place already feeling anxious. [S1] Okay. [S2] So you wanna wake up a little bit earlier ... | 25.32 | 3.343929 | 24,000 | audio/en/bilibili_data_22095156_BV19a4y1q7Yz_p109_BV19a4y1q7Yz_p109_m4-dialogue_0164907.mp3 | [
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bilibili_data_22095156_BV19a4y1q7Yz_p109_BV19a4y1q7Yz_p109_m4-dialogue_0164908 | [S1] Why is this matter? You know, 'cause I, 'cause when somebody's like, "You have no idea. I have this abusive boss and these jerks that I work with and I can't quit and I've got bills to play. Don't sit here, Dr. Tama, and tell me that I should, I should freaking stretch." [S2] Yes. [S1] "Go for a walk. Are you craz... | 29.92 | 3.515396 | 24,000 | audio/en/bilibili_data_22095156_BV19a4y1q7Yz_p109_BV19a4y1q7Yz_p109_m4-dialogue_0164908.mp3 | [
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