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Yes, I checked. There are none.
Can I get on with a therapist online? I tried to look into NOCD but it seems like it's only for the US citizens. | OCD |
I have a lot of friends and acquaintances, but I can't seem to really connect very meaningfully with people, and whenever I try to hang out with groups, I feel like everybody else is having a good an time and I'm just this weird outsider sitting there.
It's not that I can't communicate, but the masking required to look like I fit in is exhausting and I don't really get much out of it. Even in a group of people, I feel really lonely.
The truth is I've only really felt the kind of connection I'm looking for with a couple of people in my whole life.
There's not a lot to say here, just looking for advice I guess. | aspergers |
My mom died a few days ago,, i won’t go into much detail other than i saw her clearly when she had already been deceased.
It was horrifying to see, and before this happened i already had a fear of death/corpses so this made my anxiety sky rocket.
my sleeping schedule is a mess because of what i saw. I keep seeing her face in my thoughts and it keeps me up at night.
So far i’m relying on OTC sleep medication in the meantime but it’s getting to a point where even that doesn’t help. (I am also on Clonidine, and though it makes my eyes heavy i still cant sleep).
Is there anything else i can do to try and get a good nights rest? | ptsd |
So i got my second jab today. Fully vaccinated.
While jumping through the hoops, i kept having to "what?" the non-native speaker administering my shot. I'm sorry, i grew up with unthrottled sony walkmen and arena rock concerts. I can't hear for shit.
But she kept telling me to take painkillers for some reason. I'm struggling to catch her words, and it's the same list of over the counter NSAIDs we all know. Eventually i asked, "do i have to take the pill?". She said no.
Here's where i need a filter. I added my stock opinion on painkillers, pretty much set in stone by age 15. "I never bother with anything less than a narcotic." I have a second clause, but even i 'read the room' on that one, and faltered. "Like...ummm...if a regular pill can dent it, i'll just ignore it."
Sorry. Forgot there's a thing with white people and heroin today. I don't pay attention to pop culture. | aspergers |
I just got nervous about asking my uni about ADHD screenings because I can't figure out if I'm faking it or not. I googled faking adhd and came across a 4 year old post on here about it and I had no idea people fake adhd to get meds or buy adhd stimulants for exams and shit
At least it gives me a bit more confidence knowing people fake it to get pills for energy. I just want to be seen by a professional who can calm me down and make my brain slower and more organised. I don't stop paying attention because I'm lazy, I'm just always daydreaming through classes and I'll come to like I was unconscious and have no fucking clue where we are in the lesson | ADHD |
I was sitting at home and had an intrusive thought about 2 people doing adult stuff. I am asexual so this gave me a scare but the groinal repsonse wasn't/isn't as strong as it was a little bit ago. It's starting to reduce its severity from really bad to half way. As in a semi state. It gave me a scare because I had an overwhelming sense of anxiety sitting through it and that's all that happened. Am I starting to control my anxiety better or is my body just not reacting to the thoughts as badly? | OCD |
I am currently living in the student halls and I don't want to be a dick and ruin his fun, but it's quite overwhelming having people in the lounge and kitchen all the time when I'm trying to study. Am I overreacting? Tell me about your experiences. (No I haven't told him I am Autistic) | aspergers |
(15F) I’m just gonna get out my emotions it feels like i like these thoughts or like they are fantasies and I’m trying to stay calm i dont like how the groinal responses feel good and it feels like i just think about the thoughts and like them or something and it constantly feels like i wanna masturbate to gross shit. It feels like when i get thoughts during sexual stuff it feels better and I’ve liked weird shit before and I’m worried it means I’m a zoophile or a pedo. It feels like i would enjoy bad stuff cuz groinal responses feel good and i am officially diagnosed with ocd and it feel so wrong and I’m trying hard to not have a panic attack rn. I feel like if anyone reading this knew everything they would think im bad too. I feel so guilty cuz of the shit i did like and ik the stuff i did like isnt that bad and ik i still like it but i stopped all sexual stuff cuz of all these issues | OCD |
Hello community, I am looking for advice on what I can do to improve myself and make further progress in my healing process outside of therapy and EMDR. Lately I feel like I’m figuring out all the answers in therapy, yet implementing them in my daily life seems like an impossible task at times. De realization and other symptoms kick my butt for long periods of time, making it difficult for me to follow through with the small steps needed to reach my long term goals. A lot of times I struggle to even bring myself to take care of personal hygiene, and it doesn’t seem to me that the solution is as simple as forcing myself to do it. My head becomes a complex maze at times and I’m having a very difficult time with this. Any advice is appreciated, thank you in advance | ptsd |
So I just stared on the lowest dose of quick release Adderall today and I didn't start feeling anything different until 2 hours later when I drank a cup of coffee. After that I noticed that I could sit still and that I can do task.
Now sometimes before I was medicated I would have days of productivity where I felt like ... this euphoria. Like I can do anything and I had all the energy in the world to accomplish tasks. On the Adderall I don't have that. I can just do. Is this how it's supposed to be? Is this what normal feels like?
Also it's 5hrs after I took it and I'm fidgeting again. | ADHD |
It's Thanksgiving. I have to pretend and put on a bright face again. I have to pretend I still pray and am still catholic. I have to pretend I feel thankful for something. I have to be awake again today.
And tomorrow, I work all day. The next day too. I want to quit my job. I can't stand it anymore. I want to faint at work so I am allowed to rest and go home. I wish I could have a mental breakdown again, so people can see just how badly I feel underneath and between the numbness and emptiness and hopelessness.
I don't want to try anymore. I don't want to **be** anymore.
I'm a failure. I'm a dissapointment. There is nothing in this world that will ever convince me that people actually care about my struggles. They only care that I'm not well, and tell me it's MY fault and MY responsibility to get well. Like I choose to just be unwell?
What's the point of even saying I'm in pain, if all I hear is "you'll get over it." And all I see are people claiming to hide their pain better than I do. Is no one allowed to heal? I just have to live in pain and emptiness?
Why am I so weak?...why do I bother trying to self harm when I can't do it?...why is it all I can do is shut up and space out and cry buckets when I'm all alone with my thoughts? Why do I feel like nothing has changed, when clearly I have and have come a long way?
Why can't I be like the other people like me? Why do I want to be worse than some when others are doing better than I am?
The world feels fake. My own life feels fake. I don't like it. I don't want it. I don't want to be here. But I can't go anywhere else. I can't escape it. I can't heal. I can't believe in anything anymore...
It's all going to come crashing into me. I'm going to be free of the stress eventually...if it doesn't kill me first. But if it does, I'll be very glad to finally have some relief. | depression |
TRIGGER WARNING for sexual assault mention
so bad dreams is one of the persistent symptoms i get with my PTSD and they come in all forms of fucked up, but the dream i had last night has got me feeling particularly uneasy.
context:
I’ve been with my boyfriend for a year now, i love our relationship, he understands my PTSD and has helped me through a lot of things. There have been a few issues in the past but at the moment we have some pretty clear boundaries set and we both trust each other (he has some issues of his own).
last night i had a dream where my boyfriend sexually assaulted me, that was the focus of the dream and i don’t really remember much else happening other than me not being able to get away from him. It’s made me immensely uneasy, i’ve been tossing up whether to tell him about it or not but i know that if i do he will probably feel like it’s his fault/something he’s done. I cant stop thinking about it.
does anyone have any tips on dealing with this?
I hate this illness. | ptsd |
Hi. I’m on a couple medications for PTSD, and one of them controls my nightmares. I used to get these *awful* nightmares and night terrors, sometimes multiple times a night. The meds really quieted that down. Recently, my PTSD has gotten worse. Instead of nightmares though, I get these weird bad dreams that aren’t *quite* nightmares, but are distressing and about my trauma. I also keep waking up at night, and because of this, I’m really tired and irritable during the day. I messaged my psychiatrist, but it’s exhausting. Has this happened to anyone else? What do you do for it? | ptsd |
He choked me. As I was pushing the gun off of my chest he was choking me. He held his hand around my throat until I didn’t have enough strength to keep pushing.
Sometimes I still feel it. The lack of air, his hand around my throat. I sit in tears, my eyes full of white and I’m gasping for air. Or sometimes, there is no air to gasp and my throat closes completely. My mouth opens to allow airflow but it never reaches my lungs.
I’m seeing a therapist, but she calls this grieving. Because he was my husband. I don’t know what this is, I just know that I’m posting here because this is the sub I feel I relate to most. | ptsd |
22 (f)
Title is self explanatory. As a child they told me I might have ADD but they never treated it, because my mother didn’t want me to take any drugs and as it did not seem to affect my life that much. Never been to real therapy. But now growing into my adult years, I have lived a lot of traumatic bullshit, including a abusive relationship, rape etc. My nervousness is so overbearing and I get so many little ticks and can‘t seem to finish simple tasks anymore. I should be done with my studies since 2 years, but I keep repeating and not finishing stuff. My emotions are so overwhelming, some days I have happy tears because I am grateful for my life, other days I can‘t seem to get out of bed. On my worst days, I get into bed right after school and just watch stuff on social media FOR HOURS AND HOURS. I am pretty good looking so the little dopamine kicks from compliments I get from Instagram are all I really have and it is the first time admitting this and it‘s a very sad confession. I knew I was not doing well but a few minutes ago I saw myself just attached to this screen from an outsiders perspective and I thought to myself „This can‘t be my life“
I live alone in a 1 bedroom apartement and don‘t have time (7 day a week schedule) or money for therapy, I already checked. I‘d love to have some insight from people with the same tendency and I guess I‘d love to get out in this world and feel more at ease without constantly needing the „little dopamine kicks“ to feel content. I try to be more devoted to my tasks and put my phone away, but I keep going back. | ADHD |
My symptoms are pretty bad regardless. Some days I’ll be absolutely MANIC. Off the walls, doing chemistry at 3am, etc. Other days I’m what I’ve had even my own mum (via phone, different countries) tell me I’m robotic. And that’s all the days I’m NOT on my period.
So you can imagine what it’s like during my time of month. The long and short of what happened was I was torn away from my life and locked in basement cell for 8+ days (then as a kid I was sexually abused and poisoned by my father - not the same person, different people abused). And what with lockdown due to COVID, it’s a bit of a nightmare.
I try prepping each month but I can’t do anything to ward off the symptoms that go all the way to 20/10.
It’s only been 3 years since the basement, but I’m still not doing great. Trying my best, don’t get me wrong. I just need to start learning how to be prepared when it comes to this stuff; when my hormones are flying off the walls and all I want to do is cry and sleep and start fights with people in pubs. Just so I can get wrecked. Takes your mind off all the trauma, though! I’m doing my best to recover and get better. Some of my coping mechanisms just aren’t the greatest lol
Anyways, this seems all over the place. How do any of you out there deal with your periods and your trauma? Cause it’s a BIG thing for me... Cheers! | ptsd |
Hi everyone, reaching out for your opinion and if anyone is like me it would feel nice to have someone to talk to about this! Since about a year I’ve been un rationally afraid of chemicals and particularly chemical reactions between products. It started when I began living alone and having to do all the chores and manipulating products such as bleach. I’m so so afraid of putting the wrong chemicals on the wrong surfaces or mixing them or them hurting me that I wash my hands about 50 times daily to the point where I have rash burns from washing them... It recently expanded to areas outside of cleaning and now I’m always afraid of breathing or touching chemicals... Is that a phobia? | OCD |
Is it possible or common to have Aspergers and bipolar?
I originally went to see a psychiatrist to see if I was diagnosed with Bipolar because like it feels like 99% I have it but I was diagnosed with aspergers. Now being diagnosed with aspegers and doing research and stuff I was like ya this explains everything and why I am the way I am, but there’s still this one part that hasn’t been explained and I still have a strong feeling it’s bipolar.
When I originally talked to the psychiatrist he never really asked me why I thought I had bipolar he just kinda asked me random questions which I then realized was related to aspergers but we never actually talked about the bipolar side of things.
I’m not asking people to help diagnose me or what not I’m asking if anyone else has bipolar as well or if it’s common or possible. Idk lol | aspergers |
Dear all,
Few years ago, i was assaulted - someone touched me in a place where he shouldn’t have, i am a victim of fondling (not an English speaker so not sure This is the exact term). Since That day, i keep having a physical sensation on my body at the exact place. It feels like i am still assaulted 24/7. I’ve been diagnosed with ptsd, having therapy, currently doing EMDR but still the physical sensation of my abuser touching me won’t go away. Have anyone experienced and healed from This ? Do you know how this phenomenon is called ? I need to put a name on it to help me understand, please. I have spent many nights and years searching and i am exhausted. Please let me know if you know what is this sensation called. Thanks 🙏🙏🙏🙏 | ptsd |
I think I’m having (had) a breakthrough! C-PTSD since forever. Flashback’s are a bitch because I could feel them pulling on me. I felt it all. One million times. Flashbacks of the trauma became who I was. Then two? Three months ago... I started to feel my dog, Bacon, finding his spot to sleep. I felt him turning around at my feet. Then I could feel him snuggling with me on the couch. Many times I put off getting a drink or whatever so I wouldn’t wake him. The thing is, is that Bacon died a couple of years ago. I am having flashbacks about Bacon!
And then this week, I noticed the old stuff is basically not there. Where did it go? When did it go? I even tried to think of the bad stuff and yes the memories are there but there aren’t sensations of touch. It all stays in my head. But as I type this I feel Bacon asleep at the end of the couch. Holy shit! I think this is a big deal. | ptsd |
As the title says I went to get tested, I voiced my concern of ADHD and we had three different appointments where I had a few different tests that were just evaluating personality more than ADHD, a general assessment is never bad, but I don't think we went over actually testing ADHD. The tests were: Millon Clinical Multiaxial Inventory, Plutchik impulsivity scale, some personality test that was developed locally, drawing a picture of someone under the rain, D2 attention test, Bender test, Beck's depression and anxiety inventory. They barely asked about my childhood, I was the one who had to bring it up, about me getting in trouble for not wanting to sit and do boring work, or browsing through every drawer I could find at other people places, etc, which they dismissed and just moved along with what they wanted to do instead.
Today I got a report saying (in Spanish and I'm translating it to English):
"It can be observed that the subject, although able to confront the environment that surrounds him, and having the resources for it, has difficulty to perform it in an assertive way. There are evident signs of insecurity and self control. Moderate features of depression and anxiety are evident. Low performance in sustained attention is observed. The following personality traits can be evidenced. 1. Borderline personality traits 2. Impulsive personality traits"
And all this just screams signs of ADHD with borderline personality being a very usual comorbidity, and they just say it's all my personality.
Is the process of my evaluation common? Should I get a second opinion? They suggested further appointments with psychotherapy for the different personality traits, the depression and anxiety, which I'm more than willing to take if it helps me, but I don't feel satisfied with how things went. | ADHD |
I have these rituals where I force myself to be appreciative of everyone and everything in my life. I imagine the impact my death would have on my loved ones and I go on evening though I know I’m going to have to start the process over tomorrow. The thing is it doesn’t really work anymore. I know what my death will do to those I love but I am so tired. I’ve spent the last 30 years fighting everyday. I don’t want to do this anymore. My current state of mind is that time heals all and my family will move on with time.
I wish I could be stronger/healthier for them. | depression |
I'm 18 years old with a rough youth. Sorry for bad english. | depression |
does anyone else here struggle with taking baths/showers and shaving?
i loathe having to bathe and ive stopped shaving all together.
i dont like the feeling of soap and my body feels so dry after i bathe. | aspergers |
this event keeps replaying in my head and i need a place to let it out.. i let a couple into my home to stay there for 2 weeks while in the process of moving (this is it’s own story.. but they ended up staying for a month and would’ve been longer but i kicked them out.) the first time, the guy in the couple had been very flirtatious with me and i brushed it off. i shouldn’t have. i woke up to him in the middle of the night removing the covers from my bed very slowly. i told him to get out and pulled the covers back on and turned over. he stood still, hoping i would instantly fall back asleep and waited about 30 seconds before trying to remove the covers again. i jumped up and shoved him out of my room. i felt ashamed. i didn’t know if i should tell the girlfriend. i didn’t know what to do. i kept this to myself but did not speak to him anymore. the next time it happened, i am unsure because i did not wake up for it. i had a couple glasses of wine, i think he took advantage of that and was successful in raping me in my sleep. i woke up with my underwear on the ground and was bleeding badly (not on my period). i confronted him about it the next night and he brushed it off like i was crazy and was “probably just horny and fingered myself in my sleep.” i believed him. i did not say anything to anyone. the next time it happened was similar to the first except i had had enough and yelled at him. it was around 4am, i started yelling and made them leave within the hour. i had to explain what happened to the girlfriend and she took the boyfriends side that i was lying and none of it happened. i was in shock when she said this. i feel ashamed of myself for letting this go on so long. my brother continued to talk about the guy because they would play video games together and it kept making me think about what he had done. i had to explain to my brother what happened which was extremely uncomfortable but he was so amazing and supportive and didn’t speak to or about him anymore. i have troubles sleeping now because of it. i can’t sleep more than a couple hours without jolting awake and scanning the room. | ptsd |
Am I alone here? Are most people with PTSD overage? I'm 16, I already have a number of mental illnesses with PTSD, which I've been dealing with for about 10 years.. am I too young? Is this normal? | ptsd |
My OCD has prevented me from writing sentences the way I want to write them. It causes me to reword and such.
I’m a writer at heart. I just posted my first stories (some original, some fanfic) and hit 706 views. I’ve never felt more accomplished with myself.
One of my stories was one about my OCD experiences (MEETS SUPERNATURAL THOUGH AHAHA LOLLLLLLLLL) the story just hit 70 hits. It’s my favorite one I’ve written, and honestly I think it’s my best writing.
Every single ocd tendency that character has experienced, i have too.
I wrote my story of getting stuck in class and not having the ability to get out. I wrote my head flinches, I’ve wrote myself not being able to be alone.
But I wrote it. I wrote my character achieving good things too. Being happy despite her head being against her. OCD is a part of her, but it’s not all of her.
My goal is to one day create a mainstream book with accurate ocd portrayal.
But the first step. I did it guys. I did it.
EDIT: i got requested for the link in comments so here it is if your interested: https://archiveofourown.org/works/30789017
THE STORY JUST HIT 100 VIEWS <<3 | OCD |
Hi y’all! I’m on 10mg XR, and I’m trying to figure out if what I’m experiencing is normal or how I should try to troubleshoot with my psych yo change things up.
I’ve been taking my XR with a cup of coffee in the morning because otherwise it takes absolute HOURS to kick in and help at all. The benefits seem to fade between 8-11 hours from when I take it in the morning.
I’m going to work with my psych to see if I need a higher dose or maybe a morning IR booster instead of the caffeine, but I’d love to know hie long it tends to take to kick in, and how long it lasts for other people.
Also, if you had the same problem I’d love to know how you’ve solved it. | ADHD |
Tw: suicidal intention
Last year I had a very bad mental breakdown for many various, reasons, severe panic attacks, I was on the edge of psychosis. Lockdown in my country made everything worse and after a bad incident I start to walk everyday as a coping mechanism and do also some other things. I developed a routine that seemed to made me feel safe but in reality I just developed a very toxic ocd compulsion that I can't get out of it.
Although I tried through the months to break some of my patterns and after the end of lockdown things got a little bit better, I'm still afraid to get out of this routine. I can realize now that my thoughts are irrational but I can't convince myself to end it. Everyday I have to go out in the cold because I think I will get panicked if I stay in the house or I will do something to harm myself. From the other side I was so bad for so many months, every day I was suicidal and it's like I can't accept that I'm not right now, that I want to end this situation without any dramatic event. Like my suffering was for nothing, it just verify how nonsense was everything I did and how much time I wasted.
The situation is much more complex that just my ocd, is my parents behavior, my social anxiety, my cptsd but the main problem is how everything manifested in ocd rituals. I have spent more than a year sitting every night in my moms car without really understanding anymore why am I doing it and how to stop it.
I catch myself to seek everyday more and more other things, I dream the day I will read my books again, I will bullet journaling, I will clean my room, I will put my life in order. A year ago I didn't have the motivation anymore but now I feel that I have it but I can't doing these things because my ocd hold me in fear. I'm afraid that I will end up in worse situation, something bad will happen if I do something for myself, that I don't deserve to get back on life. Everytime I think about doing something I get panicked because I'm afraid that I will get new intrusive thoughts, that I will end up to psychosis.
Also, overanalyzing everything from how I will set up my journal, if I'm normal thinking a certain way and how I should do the x, z, y thing, just confirms my worries. I feel that is better to exhaust myself and not give any stimuli because I protect me. But it's so absurd because I always have in my mind that only a suicide attempt will resolve things. I always think my life after the suicide attempt. It's like I want to resolve all my problems and all my feelings first to start live again.
In the meantime I spent all my days online on my smartphone, since not opening my pc is part of my compulsions, wasting my time here on reddit, watching trash reality TV shows and commenting on Twitter. For months I tried to hold myself for indulge to spiritual stuff again like tarot readings but I get obsessed again. I also indulge completely to reassurance obsessions and magical thinking as coping mechanisms with my whole situation.
I really want to know if someone is in the same situation of being consumed in his ocd rituals for months or for years. Most people are writing about the compulsions they had for some weeks or for some hours or about pure ocd. But what can you do when your rituals are interfere in your everyday life and have become so big part of it that you can't just stop them? The biggest problem i think is that I seek a reason behind my actions, that I want them to matter. To stop them with a dramatic way not just decide to let them. I don't understand really why I have a need like that. Maybe I'm seeking validation from my family and I use this way. I have thought to make something impulsive since I go out every night to not return home, take a bus and go to for a trip in a town near us so I will break the circle. But I'm afraid I will get totally panicked in the process.
Really I feel trapped. Is there anyone else who had to deal with something like this and how you dealt with apart from therapy? How you decided one day after a year to just stop something? How you managed to sit with it? Did you had support from someone? Unfortunately my family doesn't understand. Whenever I had a panic attack from my ocd they get irritated with me they don't try to calm me down. The way they help only has a result to enable my compulsions. It's not their fault cause I force them to do certain things but they don't understand that it would be better if they denied them and they don't want to do it because they don't trust me. | OCD |
I have “obsessions” like I like a show and I only watch it for a few months and nothing else. Happens with food, music, even people. If I don’t have current obsession I feel lost and just wander through like. I have had a food obsession for about a year and have lost 80 lbs because I just can’t eat.
I have other symptoms of adhd but not diagnosed. Like forgetting things immediately. Sometimes I forget what I’m taking about mid conversation. It embarrassing
Anyway does anyone else suffer from these obsessions. Is it part of adhd or do I need start looking at another ailment for what causes it?
Any advice would be appreciated. Thanks. | ADHD |
So back a few months back I experienced a traumatic event where a loved one passed out and I thought they passed away. Thankfully everything is fine but I started getting terrible and horrible intrusive thoughts. Ones where I thought of hurting others or hurting myself. I hate these thoughts so much and I know I would never do any of those things. I literally took a pair of scissors and put it against my chest… like to test to see if I would actually do anything or something.
Is this normal? I hate this so much | OCD |
TLDR: In high school a guidance counselor told me I wouldn't get into any of the schools I applied to. I was offered an academic scholarship. And today I turned in my dissertation.
Has anyone else on here been told that they're not going to "get in" or that they "aren't cut out for that kind of work?"
In 6th grade, when I was in middle school I was dropped from the accelerated math program because I refused to do the homework. I retained all of the information taught in class and would get above 80% on exams. Math became so boring when I was forced to go back to the regular-level classes that I stopped paying attention to it until high school.
Being held-back in math caused me to be held back from taking advanced-level science courses.
When I got to high school I realized that I needed to do something to help myself stay engaged, so I started doubling up science courses so that I could take AP classes my junior and senior year. I did crossword puzzles in just about every class and learned that I could complete most of the homework before leaving school if I used my time wisely.
My guidance counselor only knew the kid that got sent down to the office for, "acting out," but they somehow didn't know the rest of me. They frequently tried to discourage me from taking higher-level STEM courses. But I did anyways. And I may or may not have been tutoring my peers that struggled to stay academically eligible for sports along the way. But the counselor didn't know that. So why do they even exist?
All they ever did for me was discourage me. They called CPS on my parents because I was open about how volatile things could get in the house--much due to my ADHD and coming down off meds as soon as I got home. They did nothing but discourage me. They put me in "groups" with students that had much less stable home lives. And I guess this gave me a place to talk about the problems we had at home...but what it really did was show me how privileged I was to have parents that cared about their kids more than anything.
When it came time to apply for college I had taken every available AP science course that fit my schedule. I crushed the AP exams. But my guidance counselor still said that they didn't think I would get into college. I sent in my applications for college and was invited to interview for honors programs. One of the schools I was particularly interested in accepted me into their program and I even got a hefty academic scholarship.
And then I killed it in undergrad. I went to grad school, and by golly, I'll have a Ph.D in just a month. So that guidance counselor can eff right off.
So what the hell do guidance counselors even do for you???? I'm sitting here 10 years later and it's still bothering me. Did it motivate me? Perhaps. But how many other students did that counselor say, "you can't" or "you won't" to and how many of them did it absolutely crush?
I understand being realistic...but people need to understand that a LOT of folks have ADHD and don't do things the way the world expects us to. We're not better. We're not worse. We're just different. And we can do anything we put our minds to.
So, if there's anyone here that needs a push. Or anyone that needs to fight off negative words that are holding them back. Remember that people only speak from their own experiences. Remember that they don't see the world, hear the world, and taste the world the way you do. Be realistic...but don't be discouraged by a single person or environment. It might not be you.
Those negative thoughts can hold us ADHDers back really bad sometimes. The key to success for us is taking the first step...and then taking it again every day. Eventually we can get there. Find what you love, and learn to do it well. | ADHD |
( true story, but the joke isn’t mine; I picked it up somewhere)
Context: my therapist has been encouraging me to be less compartmentalized , more open with my family. So we’re sitting around (parents, little sister) and I’m talking about telling my coworkers that I’m autistic. My parents seem awkward so I decide to lighten the mood.
Me: I explained to my team that I’m autistic, and they ask “so does that mean you take everything literally?” and I said “no that’s different; that’s kleptomaniacs…” 😀
My parents: DID NOT GET THE JOKE.
My little sister laughed so hard she cried, though, so we’re actually a lot closer now. | aspergers |
Acting like youre normal and are able to take and overcome all kinds of things is, tiring and ultimately hurtful. | depression |
So my therapist has said I have Acute Stress Disorder after losing my younger brother to suicide and finding him the day after Valentines Day this year. But I don’t think it is. ASD has a time frame of 3 days- 1 month after the event. It’s been almost 6 months since he took his life. I think I have PTSD, and I feel like it’s getting worse with each month that passes.
Regardless of what it is, I’m having a hard time coping even with therapy. As if things weren’t bad enough, about a few weeks ago, a couple scumbags broke into my condo where he lived with me, and stole a bunch of his stuff. We got the important things back, but the whole thing has left me shaken. I’ve become a hell of a lot more paranoid since. The smallest noises cause me to have panic attacks.
My dad dropped something one night while trying to set up shelves in the room he set up for my brother, and I immediately assumed the worst, which caused me to have a panic attack. I went to check on him. It was nothing but it still caused me to freak out.
I went to my old condo about a week ago to grab a few things left there. When I went in to my old bedroom, I saw a blanket set up like someone was sleeping there. Turned out my dad had slept there. But it still caused me to freak out.
I went to my old condo (my dad owns it) to work on bagging whatever is left up, so I can toss it in the dumpster. I was so afraid of walking into the place to find someone there. And I couldn’t be there. I lasted maybe 30 minutes there before I had to leave.
How do I cope? I listen to music, read books, play video games, go to the gym, do any number of things to try and keep myself busy. But it doesn’t work. I keep going back to finding my brother. I keep freaking out. And every time, I feel helpless after a panic attack. I don’t like feeling this way. I hate feeling helpless. | ptsd |
Note: I am asking for support
I am 23 years old, I have been diagnosed with OCD since 8th standard. Currently in my final year of engineering.. Just gave the first exam of my final semester today.
Few days ago, I just happened to reach such a point. How I came to that point is another story. Irrational questions like "How do you know your memory is working correctly or not?", "How do you know that the logic and reasoning that you do with your mind is not flawed?", "How do you know that your memory records your life experience correctly or not?", "How do you know if your mind is your own and its strings are not being pulled by someone else?"
This irrational self-questioning mess is really horrible but I have managed to come out of it by reasoning and currently I am 95+% free of the problem. I have driven all that to the back of my mind. I am keeping my mind diverted and have this one answer when these nonsense questions come "I know that all my faculties are working 100% fine from my own observation and experience."
I have it under control but I think it is better to share and talk about it. I am almost well but in between I feel bit bothered and anxious by these stupid questions. This is such a nonsensical situation where I know very well that all my faculties are working 100% correctly but still stupid shit bothering me at times.
Is it just simply too much overthinking or did I develop another disorder? If anyone happens to have a knowledge of it or if you have encountered this or something similar or even if you have never had any such problems, please talk to me for a while since I sort of need to discuss, address and not keep these things suppressed within myself.
Yes, I do have it under control, I am mostly fine, I am able to study with full focus and do all activities normally. As I said, I have already almost completely shut down the notorious questions and am at ease but little bit of the issue still remains and in between I feel bothered and anxious and at those times I ignore it or explain why all my mental departments are working totally fine. But I think keeping it all to myself is not good. Opening up and talking about it will make things better more quickly. | OCD |
I’m very open to explaining to my partner what OCD I deal with and how he can best support me during therapy. Any tips on how he can help especially since I look for reassurance for my OCD? | OCD |
3 weeks ago, I found out that my partner of four years cheated on me for more than a year. We already broke up when I found out. But when we broke up a month before I found out, he made me think it was because of me. I was the reason we broke up. I made him feel anxious all the time. All those time, I was questioning myself, my worth, everything about me.
When I found out that he broke up with me so he can be with his side chick, I was so angry. They even made it official the day after we broke up. My pain turned to hate. I wanted him to hurt as much as I am hurting. But it seems he isn't affected at all. The side chick even sent me a long message about my ex not caring about me, how I felt, and said he never even loved me.
I know they are happy now and I can't find it in me to accept it. Someone I shared my life with for years lied to me, betrayed me. I loved him despite all his flaws, his condition, but he just manipulated me and turned me against myself.
When we started dating, I just came out of therapy. He took care of me, made sure I'm following everything my therapist told me, he helped me overcome my ED, he helped me be me again, only to destroy me in the end. | depression |
It's been hard these past few days and hard to resist to confess I just wanna confess and confess everyday all day and I'm just scared that what if my friends are bad people for saying an edgy joke does that make me a bad person for hanging out with them when they're not edgy they're the kindest human beings I've ever met I can't seem to stop ruminating ever you guys' too? | OCD |
we're going to run away for good and kill themselves. I'm worried because I didn't handle the signs properly and I want to be able to help them and make sure they're ok. Luckily the cops found them and I don't know much past that point.I want them to know that I know and understand how it feels to want to kill yourself because I've come close to doing it myself and I want them to know that I know how they feel and that I want to help them, but I have issues comforting people and conveying how I feel about a lot of things so it comes out as cheesy "friend" talk about some bullshit I don't understand. I don't want any of my friends to feel this way and I don't know how to help and I'm stuck since they haven't been in school all day. Please give me some advice if how to help. Thank you | depression |
When someone asks me if I have a best friend I just say “idk” because I know whoever I choose would pick someone over me | depression |
I've had PTSD for a few years now. It has gotten better in a lot of ways, but lately I'm finding myself struggling more than usual. Lots of hallucinations and paranoia. So my doctor started me on a new medication. Because of this new medication, I fell asleep at work. I was just fired for this. I am so bummed out. I really liked that job, even though I think it was partly why my symptoms were flaring up. I fucking hate being fired. :( I wish there was a cure for PTSD. | ptsd |
I apparently both have an deficiency but also iodine seems to be linked to OCD through hyperthyroidism ? Anyone have experience with this, can lack of iodine cause ocd ,could it be that I don't have hyperthyroidism but lack of iodine ? This is super confusing | OCD |
I'm almost through with the process of getting diagnosed. I've been through a stupidly long list of different careers I tried to study into, and the last time I crashed and burned, and had to take half of the year off, I actually got help instead of just giving up and picking up the next thing, thinking "maybe this time it'll work out".
My school schedule now consists of the classes I need to re-take, literally 50% of courses and school time that everyone else (the 1st yearers) are doing, and *I'm doing great in them*. When half my schedule is free time, I actually have the time and mental space to focus on the school tasks and get them done in time. I've returned every single piece of independent work on time, and I get *flawless* grades on the work I submit. When I'm not overwhelmed with the amount of work, I can execute everything perfectly, teachers pick up my work and show it to the class as an example of how to do it right. I'm working faster than the rest of the class, even in the courses that I'm doing for the first time, even in courses I am taking with the 2nd year-students whom I started with.
I am not stupid. I was never stupid. *I'm perfectly capable of learning and doing things exactly right.* But I'm *only* able to do it, able to execute things up to my own satisfaction, when I'm *only doing half the work as everyone else*.
As much as I would have gladly killed to hear something like this years ago, I hate learning it now. Somehow, I hate learning that I'm not simply stupid, my brain is perfectly competent but *weak*. I hate knowing that I could have been capable of so much more, and I would perhaps already be someone by now, if I wasn't handicapped by something this stupid.
I have never believed in the supernatural, and I believe it's bad for an individual to constantly imagine that someone is playing a grand joke on them, but when it comes to ADHD, it's hard to visualise it in any other way than that somewhere out there is a demon who came up with the most cruel joke to play on a mortal. | ADHD |
It's me again! Haha
I saw my psychiatrist today and explained a few things. I may have to go on another medication due to my reoccurring nightmares.
My dreams are either really sad and upsetting or just straight nightmarish.
In one dream, my old caretaker who emotionally abused me, the religious wackadoo? I had to go back to her place and she essentially abandoned me and told me I was worthless and disposable.
In another dream, this one last night, I used a suitemate's toothbrush by mistake. All three of them ganged up on me, telling me I was stupid and disgusting, and that I should move out.
There've been a few more vivid ones. The scariest one was that I was a wild west banker, and I was trying to protect my stagecoach, but a robber shot me in the face. I went back to sleep and the scene replayed. It was so vivid, the pain didn't scare me so much as the loud noise did.
I have a lot of dreams like this, ones where I'm abandoned or abused in some fashion. It's kind of common. They started happening at the beginning of the semester. The very first one was when my wackadoo grandmother and my brother visited me, but the whole time they were telling me how I was going to hell for being queer, and that I was a disappointment. But they were nice to my roommate, and when I wanted them to leave, my roommate refused to help me kick them out because "they're so nice! Why would you kick them out? You're paranoid!"
The thing is, I do actually have to go back to my home state this Thanksgiving to take care of legal stuff regarding my car. But I get to see my friends. Unfortunately, I do have to stay with my grandmother, so I'm not sure how well I'll fare.
Do you guys have a lot of vivid nightmares? I'm not sure how to end this, so I'll leave it here. | ptsd |
Over the last few years I've occasionally come across ADD/ADHD stuff on the internet, and my internal response was "yeah, that describes me pretty well." and then moved on with my scrolling. It wasn't until recently I found myself down the rabbit hole after watching a video on one of my hobbies where they briefly touched on an issue they had because of their ADD, and I remember thinking "wait, that's an ADD issue..?". And from there I started reading more about other peoples experiences with ADD, uncovering more issues that I relate strongly to that I had no idea were symptoms of ADD.
Reading most of them were like I had written them myself, and forgot about it. Some made me laugh, as they made comments about how they developed a strong interest in Hydroponics and Photography and spent hundreds of dollars on them only to never eventuate. My hydroponics setup sits in it's box, along with hundreds of dollars of photography gear, in a room with all the other stuff I've bought for hobbies that I lost interest in shortly after starting them (calligraphy, cnc machines, trading cards, homebrewing, etc). Stuff I'll never get rid of, because I tell myself one day I'll do it. (Happy 3 years to my CNC machine still unused..).
I realized that maybe I'm not as much of a shitty human as I thought, and there might be hope yet. So I booked in with my Dr to get a referral, worried what he might say, he gave me one. Hurdle 1 complete. I called the Dr.. "Send through your referral, if you're accepted you'll find out within the week but the first appointment won't be for 6 months".
I'm pretty anxious. Realising that so many of my issues, that up until now I thought were just my shitty personality, could potentially be helped.. But.. I'm afraid that when the time comes to talk, I won't explain myself well enough. Or I'll be dismissed.
I know realistically, they're a professional that deals with ADD/ADHD patients all the time. Surely they'll know. It's really hard not to think I have it, it makes perfect sense of everything (zoning out daily in conversations where they talk for more than 2 minutes, walking around the house in autopilot and putting whatever is in my hand in the most obscure spot, no sense of time, making up generic responses to "how was your weekend?" cause I literally can never recall what I did on the weekend, focusing on new hobbies but never finishing them, always missing deadlines, getting to the end of my easy work list and hitting a wall).
I know I should be open to the idea that I don't have it. But it's really difficult when I relate so hard to pretty much every post about those with it. Even as I write this I feel like a fraud, despite feeling 95% positive that I have it.
I'm not entirely sure what I expect from this.. I'm not one to write on reddit. Just feeling a bit overwhelmed I guess? Realistically all I can do is wait to see if I've been accepted for a consultation, and then wait the 6 months.
TLDR; Anxious that I'll wait 6 months for a consultation only to be told I don't have ADD. | ADHD |
One of my compulsions is counting or repeating words or phrases in my head while air typing and tapping my toes. This morning I was repeating "Kotkaniemi" in my head when I woke up. Normally I would be immediately stressed, wondering why I'm doing compulsions IN MY SLEEP, but as a hockey fan it just made me laugh. So for any of you Canes fans out there, I'm a Stars/Flyers fan but apparently my OCD brain is cheering for Carolina!!! | OCD |
I came from Iran to Canada 5 years ago to get my Master’s. I had a scholarship and future seemed so bright with a basic picture of my life in my mind. My mental health crashed and I had to withdraw for two semesters and that extended my studies to 4 years instead of 2years. I was diagnosed with PTSD, ADHD, anxiety and suspected to be bipolar. I didn’t have time or understanding to process my emotions as an adult and kept pushing to finish sooner which I failed and list money. So when I finally graduated all those raw core emotions are emerging. I lost contact with family and have no friends to talk to. I don’t have a picture of myself or my future. In my family none of the adults talked to me about how to do things, how to handle life,no one even talked to me about how their day went as an adult. Now I have nothing to use as reference to guide me. I know my case is not rare so I hope someone out there hears me and can help me find a way. It seems all I wanted was escape my family and country and graduate. And now nothing is left. I’ve escaped but nothing good of my imagination is left to take me to a place, I don’t know who I am or where I belong to go there. | depression |
When I read a sentence, I forget it immediately as I read another. I cannot recall it after a second of reading it.
Also, sometimes, I can't read anything. I can see words, but not understand them and absorb them. To be clear, this isn't reading and forgetting, it's with reading itself. I've been to various subreddits and asked questions but no one really knows what this could be. Are these symptoms of ADHD?
Also, do symptoms get worse? I've seen people on this subreddit say they are unable to read anymore. This implies they were able to at a certain point. Cause, I was once able to read books without needing constant music in the background. | ADHD |
I felt so good for the last week. My obsession of wanting to be fed to death and being a feedee seemed so ridicoulous and I even was able to pursue my normal life even was able to play video games which I didnt for months now. And now I am checking out feederism porn to see if I got an erection. I never do but I got one though under weird circumstances which nonetheless lead to this fear. I only liked fat girls and wanted to be strong and fit and now I have thoughts about wanting to submit to a skinny psychopath who kills me with food and the worst thing is in these images the fat men are happy and want to get killed. I swear by all gods I rather kill myself honorable as a thin good looking man before becoming the fetish object for such a freak. Is this ocd? I mean because it is in relation to a fetish that I actually have I mean I like fat girls never did I want to be fat myself this is unmanly. | OCD |
There’s just so many things to do and so many things in general. I just feel like there is not enough time in the day to do everything I wanna do. Like most people have a phone—how the fck can you be bored with a phone in your hand???????? A phone has access to all the information and videos and pictures and games and stories and LITERALLY ANYTHING on the planet.
I just don’t understand. That’s all. | ADHD |
Before you start your kitchen go check your mail. You’re welcome.
Also maybe try to remember that mail exists even when you’re not waiting for a package. Just a thought.
But fr I’ve only packed two boxes (yesterday) and movers will be here in 12 hours. Where tf is my panic mode OP mindset at and why hasn’t it been triggered yet I hate it here | ADHD |
Anyone ever just imagine scenarios in your head (Sth that happened or made up) and then ask yourself questions and answer them in a certain sequence. Even after answering, you might still have to do it again cause it didn’t feel right (just right OCD). Eventho you know at the end of the day you’ll give the answers you want. This could last at least an hour for me.
I used to do it a lot. Lesser now. But I just did one hour of it and God I hate it. | OCD |
So, what if I'm obsessing over something that I can't really expose myself to anymore, because it was a one-time deal? I was once roleplaying with my friend, and at a difficult time for me, he kind of forced my characters to be enslaved, which I absolutely despised. He knows those weren't good scenes and apologised for them, but I was obsessing over them for a long time, and now mentions of slavery in fiction bring back intrusive memories of that happening. At one hand I kind of wonder if I should write those scenes becacuse technically there was never a resolution to them (my character escaped but never finished the plot of fighting against the villain that capturd her, or my character was going to be captured but the plot was never finished either), I don't feel any anger towards my friend, but those scenes still replay in my head after a few months. The thing is, neither of us really wants to write them and I can't forcee him, and although I can get over my initial fears of writing them, the thought of writing it with him again makes me not so much terrified but just plain bored. Not only that, but I wrote those scenes myself already, forcing myself to write them to expose myself, and it didn't work. It feels like nothing short of turning back time and continuing them at the moment where I was terrified of them/them not happening at all would exposee me to them. I literally have no possibility of exposing myself to them. How do I deal with this? I'm fearing as well that I'm obsessing over exposure and that I shouldn't be so focused on this but I can't know. Please someone answer me. | OCD |
Do you have this moments where you think what you said is not 100% true?
Example - my kid told me a joke, which had an interesting twist. Nothing too special, but still some idea went into it. I told her what a **wonderful mind** she has, as an emotional reaction to it (and also a bit to make here feel good). And then the thought process - wait, do I really think she has a wonderful mind? Am I just being polite? I guess to a certain degree I am.
Bottom line or more generalized - do you pick on what you have said/thought/felt and see if it holds **up to scrutiny and the magnifying glass**?And then, when you do, nothing can survive this type of approach, because everything you say can be questioned and not being 100% correct. Because we are all complex beings, we and the person on the other side. | OCD |
Staring at the ceiling, head filled with thoughts that would make philosophers weep. A slave to my own thoughts. A victim bearing the curse of intelligence. Born with a life i did not wish for. Everyday is the same, longing for the freedom and glee of the past while being anxious and filled with dread for the future. The cycles of night and day predetermined. But who can guarantee the sun will still rise after the moon took control of my sky? As these thoughts overflow my mind, the mask i wear bears a crack. The wisp of a soul in eternal torment, in a hell i myself created. | depression |
I've lost count on how many times I've forgotten to zip up my pants after going to the washroom. I've had classmates, colleagues, teachers, and even strangers telling me that I did not zip up my pants. Just today a stranger was just staring at my pants and I didn't know what was going on until he told me that I did not zip up my pants. I felt so embarrassed.
And I don't know why I'm sharing this. Have a good day guys. | ADHD |
Not self help books! Looking for the science behind it or life with it. | OCD |
i think this girl thought i was staring at her and she then walked away really fast. What was even more unlucky is that the same thing happened a couple days later. I think i just got incredibly unlucky but i don’t want to be seen as a creep. it has been on my mind for a long time and i don’t know what to do. I don’t think a confrontation would be good. | OCD |
I'm 19 and I didn't start thinking about it until last year and I know it's not the best way to check but I've took a few online tests and the majority of them said I have ADHD, and reading more about how it affects people has just convinced me more but idk what to do, I've spoken to my doctor but I live in the UK and trying to get a therapist here is borderline impossible, if I do have ADHD I'd like to get help be it through medication or therapy but other than that idk what else there is | ADHD |
Does anyone else find that when they are depressed their OCD isn’t as bad? Like your brain doesn’t have the energy for it? I’ve been feeling really down the past few weeks, due to some bad news/general lockdown fatigue. I started to feel way better this week and I’ve just been hit with a wave of rocd, super frustrating. | OCD |
Over the past year and a few months, I have gotten really afraid of germs, and not just covid germs. I am especially particular about my bed. I have always showered and changed my clothes before I got into my bed at night. which I think is normal But I am progressively getting worse. First, I take a shower RIGHT BEFORE I get in my bed, I shower and then scrub my feet for 45 seconds with a scrub brush and then i step onto a CLEAN bath mat then directly into my slippers without touching the floor. After this, I cannot sit on any living room or kitchen furniture because those have germs from the outside world and I am not as picky about the germs on those things. I then wear slippers every time I get out of my bed after that. If my feet happen to accidentally touch the floor I cannot get back into my bed or put my slippers on until I wash my feet again. I cannot put my bare feet on the ground where I or someone else came home from a public place and walked around in their shoes. I might as well just go barefoot then and come home and not even shower. Then I put on clean pajamas and only wear them for 2 days at the most. If I get up to pee, I must take off my pajamas. This is a new thing I started doing because I would accidentally touch the side of the toilet or the trash can with my clean pajamas and it would annoy me because then Id have to change my pajamas again. Then everything that comes into my bed must be cleaned first. I disinfect my phone and my computer every night before bed. I cannot touch my phone charger if it falls on the floor. I wash my hands obsessively especially after I get up from my bed. I really don't know what Im going to do with myself because it is progressively getting worse. I guess I just hate the idea of another persons germs in my personal space. Im writing this because I got up to get a snack and the side of my pajama pants MIGHT have touched the garbage can and I totally freaked out because I was stupid and forgot to take them off. I don't know how to get better because I always have had the idea that I didn't want my bed being dirty, but all the covid craziness made me go to the extreme, but its not covid germs im afraid of. | OCD |
I usually don't like venting because because it feels so whiny, but college just started again and I can already feel my OCD getting worst.
Just for context, I was diagnosed a few years back and my OCD usually consist of Harm, Real life Event and a few others.
My OCD had been under control for a bit and it felt like the school year was gonna be good, but I was so wrong. I started a comm class today and we had to get up and introduce ourselves. I was so nervous that my voice started to shake and I could feel the room judging me. As I left the room, I immediately started to ruminate about how embarrassed I felt. I caught myself performing my vocal/physical compulsions immediately after class. I just feel exhausted. It's been hours since class and I'm still struggling to control my compulsions. My OCD hasn't felt this strong in a long time. Sorry if this is whiny but I'm just feel like quitting. | OCD |
Just a few more quotes to support my brothers and sisters. Eliminating rumination is the key. Hard to start but brings freedom
Source: https://drmichaeljgreenberg.com/articles/
"the only way to eliminate a compulsion is by making the choice to stop doing it. No other aspect of treatment will make a compulsion go away. Thus, since rumination is a compulsion, the patient has to directly eliminate it in order to get better. This might sound obvious, but many people think that some other part of treatment, such as an exposure, is supposed to somehow make the rumination go away, and that will never happen "
" Realizing that virtually all thinking related to an obsession is rumination, that rumination is a compulsion, and that a person must therefore directly eliminate rumination in order to feel better is the starting point for getting better from OCD."
" For a whole bunch of reasons that are beyond the scope of this article, eliminating rumination only part of the time doesn’t work. If you want to get better, you will have to eliminate rumination all the time. Treat this like a deadly allergy, not a diet."
" Being too careful: Are you carefully thinking about the decision to stop ruminating each time you have the urge to ruminate?
Carefully considering the decision each time doesn’t work for multiple reasons. It effectively means you’re ruminating a bit each time, and it also maintains your sense of threat. It typically also leads to inconsistency. Make the decision to stop ruminating once and then ruthlessly adhere to it" | OCD |
Hey all,
I've always been someone who enjoys reading and for the past few years it's been a fulfilling hobby that didn't stress me out or anything.
But that changed this year. I've always relied on tv shows for escapism and lifed through them, pretty much formed parasocial relationships w/ my favorite characters. I need to know there's a show I can watch to take my mind of things and it has to be a show I actually enjoy/ am invested in. It can't be just *anything.* As a teenager I had to spend some time in hospitals/in a cast and since then I'm pretty much terrified of boredom so that's for background.
Yeah ok so in March COVID happened and productions for tv shows shut down and I spent two months at home since the place I work at had to shut down oto. Since I didn't know when the shows I'm watching would air/start production again I tried to focus on reading.
To put it into perspective: Last year I read 53 books. This year I read 67 so far. And it's stressing me out because I mostly read english books and for some reason it's taking weeks for them to be shipped to Germany, I have this thing that I only read paperbacks and long story short: I feel like I'm running out of reading material and trying to "organize it" and making sure I don't run out has been stressful.
I don't have any friends that rely on escapism even nearly as heavy as I do and I guess I just wanted to share and...maybe someone can relate... Since I also have CP I'm pretty often fatigued and can't just replace reading/watching with something like going on a run or something...
Would be nice if someone with similiar experiences could share. Or like, maybe there's even a solution?
Thanks in advance
Sam | ptsd |
Even when I feel “well.” I feel like I’ve lost my sense of who I am. I don’t even mean in a violated sense or in relation to my “harm.”
Does anyone else here feel completely devoid of an identity? | ptsd |
Hey guys, I recently got diagnosed with ADHD-PI. My doctor decided to start me on Adderall XR 20mg once in the morning.
The first day I noticed I wasn't constantly fidgeting anymore. My wife was telling me all about her book and I actually felt like I was grasping the characters and plot and better understanding what all was going on. I felt like the medication was very subtle honestly besides some small side affects. Occasionally I felt my heart beat through out my body, I felt hotter than usual, and appetite suppression. Other than that I felt normal except I noticed little changes.
Over the next 4 days my side affects have seemed to tamper down: appetite suppression is mostly gone, I don't feel my heart beat as often, still feeling hotter than I think I should sometimes (this is annoying just bc I'm hot by default).
But it also seems like I'm not getting any benefit from the medicine as the side affects lessened. I've noticed after the first 2 days that I just feel...foggy. I caught myself struggling to focus/understand things. I was catching myself just zoning out a bit, specifically one time my wife was trying to get me to help her with something and it was like her words didn't make it to my brain the first time. I also notice I'm fidgeting again more. I almost feel like it's a little worse than my "normal" ADHD even is.
I guess my question is, *are these the typical signs that my dosage needs to be higher?*
I don't have a follow up appointment for another 3ish weeks. I kind of wish my doctor had started me out with 2 week follow up now instead of 1 month... Part of me has been considering trying Vyvanse since I've read it has less cardiovascular side affects so I think this may lessen my heart beat / hot feeling I'm getting, but the other part of me doesn't know if I want to start figuring out the right dosage from 0 again. The upside of switching is I'm positive I'd qualify for their Help At Hand program which would made the medication 100% free.
Hopefully someone can provide some insight. Thanks. | ADHD |
I love solving problems and that part of my job, but I loathe all the extra bs. Especially useless meetings and being overloaded with meetings. I start falling apart when I feel like I am not challenged and the boredom kills me.
How are you all dealing with this sort of thing? | aspergers |
I just wanted to share two things that have helped me the most when my OCD gets really tough to fight.
1. Telling myself “I know it, even if the OCD doesn’t know it”. You know that feeling you have deep down when the OCD makes you doubt things? Hold on to that. The OCD will try to make you feel like you’re confused about what is real or not, whether you really did something or not, etc. but deep down you know the truth even if your OCD doesn’t. And that’s ok.
2. Also reminding myself every time I get a surge in anxiety from not doing compulsions/upsetting the OCD “this is what it does”. This anxiety is literally what the OCD does, so don’t expect it to act differently. The anxiety is meaningless and it CAN NOT HURT YOU! The OCD will try to convince you otherwise, but you are always the one in control, not the OCD.
Hope this is helpful someone else! | OCD |
I'm a single parent of a teenage and I struggle badly with depression and anxiety. In past month my child has come to me about her own suicide thoughts, no plans to do but just thoughts. I have set her up therapy with the help of her school counselor that they recommend. I'm sit here though feeling like this is all my fault and I'm such a bad fucking mother getting triggered in to all my shit. How can I help her if I'm like this? Am I self if I try or even need help for myself to handle this situation? | depression |
So basically, I was diagnosed with Autism when I was about 9 years old. I don't remember much from then, other than that I was rather isolated from other children at the time. I never had any sensory problems, and my social isolation seemed to disappear as soon as I started junior high school. Ever since then, I have had absolutely no problems talking to people, and have gotten relatively popular within my school; even though I am seen as sort of weird by my peers. I did the Autism Spectrum Quotient recently and I scored a 9, indicating apparently, none or no symptoms of Autism. Was I some how misdiagnosed? I also have a diagnosis for ADHD and Anxiety if that helps. I just wanted to ask. | aspergers |
I haven't been in a relationship in about 9 years or so. I'm currently 26, last one I had was when I was 17.
I used to feel super insecure about not having sex or a relationship, but over the years, I've kind of just grown to not care anymore?
Like, I'm more or less okay with never having sex or never getting into a relationship again?
Over the past week, one of my best friends from Highschool got married, and at his wedding, a lot of people I'm friends with were asking me when I was gonna go out and find someone. I responded that it didn't really matter to me that much, and it seemed like they got really upset? Some of the friends I've made in college also feel like this too when I tell them that I don't think relationships are for me.
I'm pretty happy just doing my hobbies with those that I care about. I'm pretty sociable, and do like hanging out with people quite often. I.e going to the movies, playing cards, hanging out at a friends house etc.
Idk. Does any other Aspie on here feel like this, or are in a similar situation to me? I don't feel like I need that special someone to be happy. | aspergers |
Hi all!
So I’ve been dealing with a hip injury (torn labrum) for close to two months now, and I just found out I’m going to need surgery. My sister’s wedding is December 18th and I live out of state, so I’m having major anxiety around not being recovered in time.
One of my themes is Health OCD and I have a compulsion to google and read anything and everything online about my ailment. I’m doing everything I can to resist compulsions but I’m feeling overwhelmed by anxiety.
Looking for advice and support. If anyone on this subreddit happens to have experience with a hip labrum surgery that would also be a plus (not looking for reassurance but advice/tips/your experience)
Peace and blessings. I’d appreciate some good energy! | OCD |
I wouldn’t wish the feeling of having no one on my worst enemy. | depression |
Ever since I had my first job at 17 years old, I spent money on anything and everything. I quickly became addicted to that wonderful feeling of obtaining a new “thing”.
Fast forward 8 years and I am now 25 years old and about $45,000 in debt, $15,000 being credit cards. If it wasn’t for my well paying job, I would be drowning in monthly payments right now.
I just bought my dream car and have been feeling that impulsive urge to throw money I don’t have at it. I was about to schedule an appointment to get the paint corrected and have paint protective film installed for $3500. My fiancé was not thrilled and managed to help me realize how stupid adding another $3500 to my debt was. I am so grateful that she got that through to me.
I am currently in the process of being diagnosed because I believe ADHD is intruding into all aspects of my life at this point. I’m struggling in school, at work, and putting strain on my relationship.
Has anyone else struggled with impulsive buying? How have you overcome it? | ADHD |
Before discovering that I had ADHD I used to think there was just something wrong with me. I would rarely be interested in anyone, but if I ever did find someone who said interesting things, I would be unable to play cool with them and just sort of....impose myself in their space. I would constantly be thinking about them (remember, this is all just in my head) but I'd be deathly scared of telling them I like them because I don't even know them well enough. I just spent a disproportionate amount of time hyperfixating on the person, their interests etc. For any normal person, this level of intensity can be a bit much. I've been publicly shamed as a creep because of it when I was young, so now I put a super tight leash on myself and don't allow myself to romantically like anyone. If I do find myself liking someone, I find that it always ends up with me hyperfocusing and then I force myself to give up on that crush because I cannot trust my own judgement that I'm not misreading the situation.
What have your experiences with romance been like? | ADHD |
No point in posting this, I'm starving, I haven't eaten since Friday it's mentally killing me to go into work, I'm avoiding my therapist, I'm avoiding everyone, I use people as a crutch, I'm a disgusting selfish person.
What do I do? I'm broken and it's gonna take years to fix? Depressive episodes take a few months to recover from??? I'm late 2 months on rent and I can't even get up off of the floor I sleep on. Nobody will listen.
I'm eternally a person in a space pod floating away from earth with nothing to sustain them. It's embarrassing. I feel truly useless.
I am useless, it wasn't that I had no time, my mind was slipping, I'm slipping, I just want to scream so maybe I feel something positive, but it just isn't there. Everything is gone. I have no will to progress. | depression |
Quit Path of Exile and WoW this year, probably for good given how much unwelcome I feel in these games, feels like a second job most of the time. Now SWTOR is seemingly on the same track.
I've no idea what the fuck am I going to play in December or next year, quite frankly there's not much I have to look forward to in that time, been this way for a long while now though.
I guess I'm mostly mad about how fucking stupid people are in these game communities though, they gaslight each other 24/7 and keep devs on a fucking pedestal like these assholes aren't actively manipulating the playerbase to get more money while actively making games worse. I guess that's same as politics, getting people to act against their own interest is politics 101. Which is another discussion, but I don't even want to think how fucked the world is.
It feels like a lot of games are on this track to get rid of casuals and ruin themselves, might be my overly-negative thinking though, but seeing at least 3 games do this shit makes me think its not just that. | depression |
It is all illusion, and if I am happy everything will go wrong, I will be frustrated. | OCD |
It’s really hard to focus on one particular thing when I am perpetually reminding myself of all kinds of random nonsense. Oh, I gotta finish my work? Nah, I gotta obsess over this song I heard a few weeks ago for a few minutes.
Wait, actually, I need to talk to myself and pretend that I am teaching someone about a philosophical dilemma I just remembered.
Oops, time to check literally every part of Reddit that I frequent in order to make sure I didn’t miss out on anything in the past 10 minutes since I checked it.
And then I just absentmindedly drift for dozens of minutes doing nothing productive.
I am moderately upset. | ADHD |
My marriage is really not in a good place because of my depression and anxiety. Every time I feel like I made a step in a good direction, I'll manage to go two steps backwards. I can't help it. I react in anger and feel misunderstood. My wife would be better without me but I can't imagine my daughters not being with me. They are my only reason to get up in the morning. Life really fucking sucks and I wish I would just get hit by a truck or something. It's would really solve everything. | depression |
Hi! I just wanted to share some information that I think is important, as well as something that has helped me and pushed me forward.
OCD can send you anything and EVERYTHING you are afraid of, simply because it makes you feel anxious and make you react to them. And when you feel anxious, what do you do? You end up doing compulsions! That’s the goal of OCD. The Pink Elephant Effect is basically what this is.
Basically, the more you *fear* something, the more it will *come back*
“OMG I really hope I don’t get this thought—“ oops, there it is.
You get a thought and you think, “Oh please, please, PLEASE don’t make me feel like I like this thought—“ Oh, it felt like I liked it.
“PLEASE don’t make me feel aroused!” Oop there it is
“Please don’t feel atteacted to this, I CANNOT be attracted to this—“ Oops
“I really don’t want to feel ____” Welp shit, there it is.
You see where I’m going with this? **The more you say to yourself “DON’T feel a certain way about this!” Guess what’s gonna happen?**
Yup. *Your brain does this because it sees that you’re afraid of it and because it understands that this thing triggers you.*
Instead, try saying this!
“Oh man, I REALLY hope I get this thought. And I hope it comes back!”
“Yup, I really enjoy this thought. I enjoy it so much that I’m smiling to myself!”
“Man, there are those groinals! I love this!”
“Ohh, I feel SO attracted, I love this feeling. Thanks, brain!”
“Man, I feel ____ and I love it!”
etc.
This is advice from Nathan Peterson, who is a licensed therapist. Here’s his channel: https://youtube.com/c/ocdandanxiety
It may be extremely intimidating to do at first, but responding this way to OCD teaches your brain that “Hey! There’s no danger!”
And here’s a video that I watched from Chrissie Hodges, who is an OCD advocate (I recommend watching her channel!), which talks briefly about the pink elephant effect: https://youtu.be/3FTHSSpHLF4
The time-stamp where she talks about the pink elephant effect is roughly around 21:10 but I recommend watching the full video when you have time!
I hope this helped and I wish you the best! I believe in you! | OCD |
I need out of this house, out of my family, away from the toxicity, away from it all. This is miserable. | depression |
I’m just so fucking angry. It’s taking everything in me to resist the urge to destroy everything I come into contact with, wanna fucking snap my phone in half as I write this. Keep almost ripping doors off their hinges. I was cutting chicken the other night and it kept sliding under the knife cause it wasn’t sharp enough and I just fucking lost it and stabbed it over and over again. Think mostly I wanna destroy myself more than anything else.
I’ve been pissed off for a while, but it peaked yesterday during a workout, I literally couldn’t finish it cause I was so fucking angry and that only pissed me off more. I haven’t come back down since. I’ve just blown my fucking cap and there’s no putting it back on. Feels like I’m seconds away from drinking again or cutting. I’m gonna relapse, don’t think there’s any way around that at this point, it’s gonna fucking happen. I’m just not gonna be able to put up with this for much longer. Wish I had something stronger than alcohol but I don’t, so I guess I’ll have to settle. Gonna be 4 months down the fucking drain but it feels inevitable cause this shit ain’t going away. Doesn’t fucking matter anyway, life’s way worse sober, don’t care what the fuck they say about “alcohol makes it worse”, I’m suicidal either way, but I found the suffering easier to tolerate when I was drink and shit.
But fuck it, I can’t get the anger away from me, I don’t know how to do it. It gets worse during workouts. Wasn’t sure why, could be an adrenaline thing or a heart rate thing or a hormone thing or whatever, but I think it’s mainly that I’m just sitting there with my fucking thoughts and nothing drowns them out. Even listening to my music at full volume doesn’t drown them out. It’s all just fucking revenge fantasies and shit. All the people I wanna fucking scream at or beat the shit out of or fucking strangle to death with my bare hands. Don’t know what the fuck to do about it. And just cause I know it’s gonna get suggested, yeah I go to therapy, I have been for two years, it doesn’t help. Neither do any of the dozens and fucking dozens of mediations I’ve tried.
Don’t know what the fuck you’re supposed to do when you’re full of so much fucking rage that it’s totally overtaking your brain. | ptsd |
I’m awaiting assessment for ADHD and something I’ve always been aware of is that when I’m totally absorbed in something, particularly fast moving things like mountain biking or playing games, my head wobbles about. I’ve never really understood why it happens and I’m just wondering if it’s an ADHD thing. Anybody want to join the wobbly head gang? | ADHD |
33 F
I have started a new ritual and it's starting to become debilitating. This is really embarrassing so please no hate comments.
I lay on my stomach or back and flex my butt muscles and I do it for hours and while I work. my muscles are very still and sore and I'm getting cramps in my thighs.
I do not know where this has came from and I've talked to my counselor about it and she gives great advice but then I go home and I've flexed my ass for 2 more hours.
Has anyone had an issue like this? My old compulsion used to me cracking my left ankle til it was swollen and couldn't walk.
Real advice is needed. Thank you! | OCD |
I remember I would wash my hands until they cracked; I never used the same towle twice, even if I was just drying them off, and I didn't hug people either. I also never liked playing in the mud. My mom told me that I wasn't a normal boy. | aspergers |
Hello,
Taking meds provides me huge benefits during the day. However, waking up seems to be more of a trouble when I have taken them the day before. It kind of feels like I am having a hangover and I seem to need more sleep. I wondered if any of you had the same and maybe somebody can give me some advice for this?
Thanks 😊 | ADHD |
We were texting today. My friend told me she was going to send out cards in a few months letting everyone know she’s moving/change jobs. I basically said, “Oh so you’ve officially decided then? That’s amazing! We will miss you so much, but I know you will do great there. What is the job going to be like?” etc.
Well, she left me on read many hours ago. This is of note because in 4 years, she never has. She told me she only leaves people on read if she’s very upset.
I thought that when we spoke last she was still deciding on the move/job. I have severe ADHD and I sometimes forget conversations or re-ask things. I often read past text messages to refresh my memory, but I got a new phone. I have an inkling we already texted about her deciding and what her job would entail.
It is possible that she thinks I am a terrible friend who can’t even remember that she’s moving. The worst part is, I literally don’t know if I forgot the conversation, or if it never happened.
I normally move on if I get left on read, but I don’t want to throw away this friendship. I just feel paralyzed because I can’t remember what happened. | ADHD |
three and a half years clean... out the fucking window. I just gave in to my constant thinking about cutting and I gave the fuck in. I'm sorry.
I'm disappointed. I honestly think it's a mixture of depression and my OCD making me do this. I don't wanna do it again. I felt such a release when I was cutting and now I don't even know what I'm feeling. I'm just here in bed, writing this post... doing nothing. | depression |
I get my meds delivered, I (very ironically) forgot to ask for a refill in time, and now they’re going to be a couple days later than I have meds to cover. I will be without medication for a couple days and I have a work from home job. I am freaking out. I know for sure I won’t be able to focus on my job without meds. | ADHD |
Basically, I had my first ever visit with a psychiatrist last week. They diagnosed me with PTSD, depression, and anxiety. However, I really do think I have a problem with ADHD. Multiple therapists in the past have suggested that they think I have it, and I have basically all of the symptoms for ADHD. When I mentioned this to the psych, they just wrote it off as a mix of depression and anxiety, since "I made good grades in high school, so there is no way you have ADHD". However, I have been dealing with the issues related to ADHD my entire life and I am so tired of interrupting people, not being able to be still, have racing thoughts 24/7, memory problems, difficulty concentrating, and so much more. Should I go to a different psychiatrist for an ADHD test/ evaluation? | ADHD |
hey guys. i’m wondering if anyone has any suggestions or recommendations of jobs that are good for depressed people. I’ve been chronically depressed for most of my life and find it’s hard to hold jobs because i get overwhelmed or experience some kind of mental health episode and need to take time off and the job isn’t understanding of it. i’m not looking for a career, just a job. i’m in school and have an internship right now. i just need something to do to make some money so i can keep paying for school. thanks in advance. | depression |
I (F22) went through a month phase of depression. I found out yesterday that my boyfriend(M23) has a female friend(which is in not an issue). The issue is he’s been lying to me about it saying that he’s been going to his friend house to play video games but instead going to see her. He claims that they are just friends and nothing romantic. And that he started going to see her to get a female perspective on how to deal with me & my depression because it began to effect him. But what really did it for me is that he sent her a floral arrangement basket & didn’t do a single thing for me while i was depressed. Didn’t buy flowers. Didn’t send me a basket. I really could have used it to make me feel a lot better. We live together and currently moving next month into a house. This totally compromised everything. Really need some advice & up lifting | depression |
Has anyone had experience taking propanalol while undergoing EMDR treatment? I’m having a psychiatrist tell me to take it and a therapist disagree. I had been on it for three years and didn’t realize it had been helping with body responses to triggers all this time. I got off of it because I was using it as a migraine preventative and I’m on a new med for that. Now, three years later my heart rate is through the roof and I am TRIGGERED by the smallest things. If the goal is to work through the trauma while on the med and then eventually get off of it I think that would be fine but if it’s to just numb me again (been so numb for years) then I feel like that’s not productive. Anyone with a similar experience? Please no graphic details of your trauma. | ptsd |
For context, Stresslaxing is “being so stressed that relaxing makes you more stressed because you're not Woking on what's making you stressed".
I relate so much to this, I find unwinding so hard and find holidays and down time so difficult and my OCD wreaks havoc!! Not sure if this is more likely to happen if you have an anxiety disorder like OCD?! Anyone have the same issue?
The thoughts of going on stress leave from work would make me even more stressed!! | OCD |
I've been with my fiance for a few years and I just started to have some intruisive thoughts about him again. I had them at the start of the relationship while getting to know him, and I didn't know how to deal with it besides talking through it all with him to lessen the anxiety, or pain, and obsession.
my memory is fuzzy but at the beginning of the relationship my thoughts could've been something like, what if he doesn't find me completely attractive? what if he rather be with another girl? what if fantasizing about the girls he follows on Instagram?
these thoughts would give me terrible anxiety, I would feel like my heart is breaking and I would feel upset with him. id spend weeks sometimes with this questions and often end up seeking reassurance from him.
now years later my thoughts are things like, what if he thinks of his ex during sex? what if he fantasizes of porn stars, etc?.....
these thoughts are dumb..... I end up searching the internet like I do with all my other obsessions...essentially to see how "possible" these thoughts are.. then I just feel upset and they sit in my mind..... I get it.... men find women attractive and like to look, or even think about them abit during sex... or not...
but it's like the thoughts sit in my mind like a dragon waiting to be slain...and I'm not sure what to do....i mean I know I have to accept the uncertainty, as with most other obsessions...but I feel like there's a thorn in my side while I wait for my mind to stop caring or develop a more balanced perspective.. ugh. | OCD |
Hey All.
A few days ago I posted on here…to share how overwhelmed I was. I just wanted to come on here and announce that I have completed my homework. It is about 52 days late /: but I’ve dragged it for so long that it just feels so liberating to be done.
Having ADHD definitely has been challenging during my senior year, but I love this community so much and I appreciate all of the helpful messages. | ADHD |
I used to just have a feeling of not wanting to exist but over a couple of weeks that feeling has shifted to a want to kill myself, I often visualize doing it, really the only thing that's stopping me is my fear of death. I don't really have a reason to feel this way, my life's ok. but lately I've been bored with everything and have had a lack of motivation for everything, and nothing has been really bring me joy lately. I haven't had the energy to go to school or even get up in the morning. so yeah I just kinda need to get that off my chest, thanks for reading. | depression |
I’ve been wondering how cannabis (THC specifically) interacts with Asperger’s/Autistic minds. I’ve always heard horror stories about it making anxiety and depression a thousand times worse.
Does anyone have any experience, either to deny or confirm these suspicions? | aspergers |
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