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Background, I have ADHD, 41/f, diagnoses 6 yrs ago and life drastically changed on medication and with awareness of my diagnosis.
My sister is 37 and we are close, frequently venting to each other about life in general. Lately I am realizing that a lot of her problems sound like... well, me before medication. Like most recently, an important email she needs to write (really important actually, to Department of Licensing for her business), that has been sitting in her inbox for over a week. She keeps opening it up, gets overwhelmed by all the questions, gets anxious, and then shuts down. So today I am going to sit down with her and help her go through it step by step because she is getting final notices that DOL needs this info.
It isn't the only example. I see a lot of things in her life, some of which she asks for support with and some of which she does not, that remind me of the dysfunction of my life 10 years ago, before meds.
I don't know if adhd is genetic. We also have an aunt with adhd. I feel like, if my sister DOES have adhd, her life could drastically improve with medication.
But I'm not a psychiatrist or a therapist or anything like that. I don't believe in "diagnosing" friends and family based on my own experience or stuff I have read. I don't know if she will react defensively and end up getting in one of our infamous "sister fights," which totally would suck.
I just think maybe she should look into this because I see her seeming dysfunctional. And I want her to be happier. She seems so frustrated with herself and her life.
I'm open to any thoughts or suggestions... seriously. | ADHD |
I’ve been trying really hard to not give into my compulsion even if it gives me a lot of anxiety. The medication I’m on is help with the anxiety but the intrusive thoughts have increased and their so exhausting and distressing.
Do they ever go away or lessen? I want to keep fighting this but it’s a lot. | OCD |
The other night I got high (just weed) with my friend and it was the first time in a long time that I hadn’t thought about my trauma, been anxious walking home in the dark or thought about self harm in a long time. I just got home, laid in bed and listened to queen (an on and off trigger of mine). I hadn’t smoked in almost a year before this so it had a big effect on me. It’s been 3 days now and the numbness is creeping back on me and I don’t know how to handle it. I haven’t been able to get out of bed most of the day and my mum’s been concerned. I’ve never been able to talk to her about my mental health or trauma in full detail without feeling awkward or her getting frustrated/dismissing me.
The anxiety and images and trouble sleeping are coming back and I don’t know how to stop them. I miss not thinking about it or being numb to it. Now I have to sit with my thoughts and my past and live with them and after my experience the other night, I really don’t want to anymore but I know I have to. That’s what this illness entails. It’s irritating me knowing I won’t feel like that again in possibly a long time. The experience the other night was so short term but so refreshing. I miss self medicating like I used to but I know it’s just so self destructive in the long run and all I’m doing is avoiding my emotions and thoughts. | ptsd |
Has anyone here done this? I don't have insurance coverage, I go through the VA. I was told in 1-2 weeks id have the official diagnosis and start medication. Yesterday I got my final appointment and it's nearly 3 months out. That's really far out for me and a friend told me to look online. Is it possible and affordable to get this done in less than 3 months? Would appreciate any insight on this- places to check out and how much it may cost. Thanks | ADHD |
I feel like I have no one and that this despair is never ending. I know it's not true. I'm just in a really dark place right now. Does anyone have good news or something nice to share while I wait this out? | OCD |
Whenever I feel safe I become attached to whatever it is that makes me feel that way, its been a problem I've had since I was a kid. However this is a problem as it pushes people away and then that triggers my fear of abandonment and I panic.
Basically what do I do to stop this? To stop the panic and becoming to clingy? I hate this because it ruins so much and it fucking sucks. It once almost ruined a friendship I have and its now ruining my chances of having a potential partner. I have to fix this before its too late.
So what can I do? | ptsd |
I just need any form of comfort I can get no matter what | depression |
He's crushed my self esteem to the point where I started cutting myself and wanting to die.
Often I wonder why I'm still with him because he's done so many hateful things to me because he wanted to hurt me and degrade me. | depression |
i don’t know how to make it stop.
i’ve been diagnosed for a while, medicated and things were okay for some time.
but i can feel it lurking. i’m falling slowly. nothing brings me joy, every good moment is just a reminder of the dark part in me. i don’t feel hot, i’m surrounded by filth and i cannot stand it but can’t bring myself to do anything about it.
i’m better than this excuse of a person i’ve become.
i’m just so…tired.
how the fuck can i take back control???
ughhhhhhh | depression |
Hey friends.
I wanted to talk about what it's like to be a rather good looking person and have ASD. I DONT WANT TO APPEAR NARCISSIST, because in reality i hate my fucking face. But due to the country that I live in girls find blue eyes and blondish folks attractive (middle east dystopia).
I've been complimented alot (and mocked on equaly) my whole life and it kinda sucks that you can make such good impression on people and fuck things up due to your lack of social skills. I dont have many friends but my limited number of friends think of me as "the fuckboy" or the guy that gets whoever he wants to. But In reality I struggle with making most basic human interactions. Small talk I mean.
A few girls had a crush on me back in college but after talking to me they just realizes what kind of weirdo I was. And eventualy they went on with their lives.
I know that alot of you folks don't stand out visualy between your countryman and I am sure that alot of you wish that you looked better. Well let me tell you the only difference it makes is that you find yourself a dissapointment according to other people's eyes. Or a waste of good looks as once a girl told me. | aspergers |
TW: Sexual assault
I’m kind of just yelling into the void today, but I just feel so heavy and don’t know what to do with all of that.
I look at people who are so well adjusted and healthy, the ones that do art and have friends over and cook real dinners. I’m just so upset that none of that is easy for me. I can barely manage eating a microwave meal or showering sometimes. It’s like I only have enough energy to do one thing, and once that’s done I’m done too. I see some people who go to school and work and still have the energy to go to the gym all while being happy and refreshed. I feel like I haven’t slept in 10 years even when my sleep is okay. I’m just so damn tired of all this.
I’m tired of feeling like I’m constantly at war with myself. I feel like a bad person all the time because I think “what if I’m just faking all of this to manipulate people? “ What if I made this all up?
My own body triggered a flashback the other day. I put my own hand on myself and there I was, feeling absolutely dirty and used and impure. Like he was here ruining me again.
I feel like a shell of the girl I used to be. Like there isn’t one ounce of light in me anymore. | ptsd |
Throughtout the year my grades in university where hovering around 80 to 90% and out of the blue my university decided to accuse me of cheating and proceeded to find me guilty of cheating even tho I had not cheated. Now this is not a post of my uni causing me to be depressed. I've been depressed for half of my live at this point.
Now, what this post is about is the fact that they essentially screwed up my life. Granted I'm still young but they absolutely destroyed everything. From my relationship, my position as youth leader, my health (I was hospitalized and had to undergo emergency surgery) my relationship with my family and friends.
And the odd part is. I'm fixated at the fact that my relationship ended with the only person that understood me. We know each other for about 4 years now and have been going out a while when this happend. I was so busy trying to deal with the lawyers and my campus officials that I neglected her and as a result of that everything went sour and it ended very badly.
I received a notice a few days ago that my case was dismissed and if I want to take it further it would cost my family and me money we don't have. I'll most likely fail the year but not only did they take away all that I love they took away my sobriety. I drank, I did drugs I tried everything but now I'm forced to restart these past 2 years. No friends, no love of my life, nothing. I know I have my family and I'm grateful but it's not enough and that's sad.
Sorry for the long post.
(tldr wa da wa da) my university took alot from me. | depression |
I don’t know if this has to do with my ADHD or something else but I have issues constantly losing things like keys, wallet, remotes. It happens all the time. I just forget where I put them last. I also have issues with being able to see the object I am looking for even when it is right in front of my face. I can be looking for something I just dropped or something like my keys that I put somewhere. I will scan for the object either where I dropped it (if I’m looking for an item I dropped) or in a specific area or room and I can scan the room many times but not see it until much later or someone else helps me and finds it right away. Weird thing is that this does not apply to moving objects. I hunt and I am able to see animals moving through the woods relatively easy. Don’t know if anyone else has this issue what. | ADHD |
Hi again to all of the amazing and helpful people in this subreddit.
So recently I've (20F) considered how to explain ADHD to my friends and family since I only know one person (well maybe two) with ADHD. Have anyone had to explain ADHD to someone who doesn't have it? I've been trying to find videos/ simulations to show people. Is there any videos, simulations, metaphors, and such?
Thank you so much in advance! And I hope that whoever reads this has an amazing day/ evening/ night.
ALSO IF IT'S NIGHT YOU BETTER GO TO BED AND GET A GOOD NIGHTS SLEEP! | ADHD |
I had a stress related meltdown today after a difficult phone conversation. Being on hold and then having to talk to a machine and listen to loads of prerecorded messages puts me on red alert and when I got some bad news from the phone call I had an extreme emotional outburst.
I was screaming and crying and looking for a place to put my rage. I just wanted it to stop so I got my leather belt and whipped my arm until the turmoil stopped. After about the third whip I didn't need to do it anymore. I could cope and think again.
I had a red arm for a couple of hours, and a very slight bruise. No one will know and I have no lasting damage.
After I calmed down I listened to some white noise on my headphones and went for a walk. I feel quite drained but I feel mostly OK now.
I feel like if I told this to a neurotypical they would be very worried about me, but I am grateful that I have an emergency 'stop' button. Should I be looking for healthier ways to stop meltdowns? When they happen I just need them to stop. They're horrendous. | aspergers |
Does anyone else tend to get more nightmares, mood instability, panic attacks ect. when the seasons change? I have noticed this happen for about 4 years. | ptsd |
I can't seem to get a workout routine established and constantly feel like there's more important things I should be doing (and then I procrastinate doing those things) so as a result I think I have a lot of pent up energy, and this is exacerbated by the meds I'm on.
I worry that it's wearing away my sanity a bit, as I feel extremely disconnected from myself and my life, and am not experiencing much emotion.
Like, I think I'm fine when doing the procrastinating, but it's as though the more I do it, the more energy collects, the less able I am to get things clear and reasoned, the less able I am to establish good habits.
Nothing is clear, lines are blurred. I don't feel like myself. | ADHD |
I’ve seen that the most common sign of OCD is excessive hand washing, and for the past 2 or so years I’ve noticed I’ve been washing my hands more frequently.
It’s gotten to the point where my skin is cracked, dry, and sometimes bleeding.
I’ve tried lotion but it never worked, and looked it up recently.
Please note I noticed this pre-pandemic and it has only worsened since then. | OCD |
It's so dramatic all the time.
I moved from California to Delaware at the start of June, but everything I own has been in California the whole time. Everything I do, all my stuff, a big part of me. The moving company, Bay Area Express in San Jose, California , tried to rip me off. So I had to call the feds, the attorneys general, the police and the lawyers. But now it's all on a truck on the way to me!
BUT- I just booked the whole week on the Adam Sandler movie in Philadelphia. The truck can't get here before Sunday, BUT- the movie will be in town in October. I want more days on it. And Diane Heery is the casting director- she can't find out I blew it off. I hope they don't get here until Sunday.
But all my documents are in that truck. I don't have valid ID, because I don't have documents. And California screwed up my unemployment way back in April. I have an appeal hearing NEXT WEEK, and the documents I need are IN THAT TRUCK!!!
Gonna say 'Fuck' once. Fuck. (Doesn't count in quotes.) Grit sucks. I recommend falling apart and throwing yourself on charity. Get some help. This do-it-alone bullshit is bullshit. | aspergers |
Hi there, new to posting here and in general. Anyways, has anyone noticed any changes or differences in masking/coping abilities from prolonged confinement and isolation?
For example, I've spent the majority of the past year alone and reading books, working on myself, and trying to do some general understanding. I don't understand much, which is why I most likely gravitated to studying philosophy, but I've noticed I have forgotten many of the meticulous behaviours I learned to "fit in" with general society. I hate to say "I've gone feral" but it sure feels a bit that way. Just wondering if anyone else has experienced any similar issues with any coping/masking/suppression techniques or behaviours they had prior to these lockdowns. | aspergers |
I've always struggled with explaining OCD to other people without feeling like I sound crazy, or like an outsider. I forget that not everyone experiences it, which is such a strange concept lmao.
I have a new go too now, after my S.O. and I watched The Ring :) I started comparing it to getting those spam emails and texts that say "Repost to 10 people or else (insert awful event) will happen."
But also aserting the belife that you HAVE to do, believing that the awful event will happen and it'll compell you until you do it.
Obviously OCD isn't this simple, and it's only one aspect of so so many things
But it's prolly the best way I could think
If anyone has any ways to explain it in anyway, please share :)
I'm excited to hear any thoughts | OCD |
please boost this so more students can see it. I need advice. how am I supposed to not fail all my classes? i’m severely depressed and I literally can’t do schoolwork. I’m sure it sounds familiar to a lot of you all. you go to school, come home telling yourself you’ll finally get one thing done, then stay in bed the whole afternoon unable to do anything. for the past few months i’ve been living in this hazy, almost dreamlike state, nothing even feels real, and i think a lack of sleep has to do with it. although the doctor gave me the option to start them, i’m not on antidepressants bc i’m worried about addiction and weight loss. i’m already very thin from being on adderall (ADHD) and can’t afford to have my appetite suppressed any more. but i’m taking a lot of high level classes and i NEED a way to motivate myself because at this point I can’t manage them. I haven’t really turned in anything this quarter and i don’t have an excuse. It doesn’t make any sense because I know I’m not “dumb.” I have an iq score that is considered high, my PSAT was in the top 1% without any prep, i SHOULD be capable, but despite all of it, I can barely even get ok grades! I know i’m not the only one who experiences this and I hate that it’s so common for the kids that used to be “gifted” to be the ones who burn out. a lot of you here are probably in that situation too. potential colleges look at all this and I don’t wanna drop my classes but I’m gonna fail them if I continue like this. how do I get myself to function?? how do i motivate myself to actually complete work? do you all have any strategies you use? | depression |
My prescription is to take 10mg once in the am and once in the afternoon. I have school after work so I need it to last that long. So basically needs to last for 13 hours. I find the second dose doesn’t work nearly as good as the first one. It kind of just makes me feel more anxious and not more focused at all since I still feel the crash from the first dose. I find vyvanse and extended release take a little longer to wear off but the crash happens just in time to start my class. And they can’t be taken twice. Has anyone found a way to make adhd meds last all day? | ADHD |
Like something that no one believed me that happened months ago and I wake up feeling like crap and that I must prove that what I said is true even tho no one cares anymore. | OCD |
I got with my ex when I was 19 and he was 16 and I am older now obviously realizing that was weird now my brain won't stop reminding me he was cute back then and last night my brain was like do it think about it and I fell into doing and feel like shit. Can someone give advice on what I should do? | OCD |
I’m a trans man with the reverse of tocd, we call it cisocd. I constantly watch detrans videos (even tho I have 2 professional gender dysphoria diagnosis.) I go so far as to post constantly and obsessively on any subreddit that has people like me in it. I did a fortune/tarot reading asking about my transition and it told me “may need to consult someone else, incorrect diagnosis possible.” It was the crossroads card. now I’m so fucking scared and obsessing over what it says. I don’t want to be a woman, I don’t want to I can’t. but what if I’m just attention seeking or a girl. I’m so scared. | OCD |
I find myself daydreaming a lot and they are quite immersive and I was wondering if this is linked to my ocd. My brother and my mom both have OCD as well (genetic lottery am I right) and we all daydream a lot. | OCD |
my favorite concept to think about is where nothing is really expected of me, i’m set for life financially, and am free to pursue all my dreams / take care of myself however i like. usually i just imagine my favorite fictional characters doing this, especially the ones who are immortal and create new identities every century + travel the mortal world anonymously together. i secretly hope there’s an alternate reality where amazing things can happen, anything that you can think of. i have so many other worlds like this in mind, magic and adventure, where i experience the most beautiful and wondrous things beyond what actually exists here. i can almost see them. i long for them like a long lost memory. | depression |
So much advice for PTSD seems to focus in on social support. For the people with no social support what are you doing to survive?
That seemed to be the most helpful to me but I can't really control people willing to be around me and that seems too have fallen off lately | ptsd |
I've noticed that whenever I forget to take my medication or during that time the medication is kicking, my perception of time is....ruined.
Other than the sensation that my brain is rushing, time seems to rush along with it (it makes sense), I'd be sitting relaxed reading "oh, let's sit down five minutes" look at the time what I feel is like five minutes and "where did these extra fifty five minutes come from?".
However when the medication kicks in, everything seems to calm down, five minutes actually feel like real five minutes, I may look at the time after what I feel are five minutes and more or less anywhere between 8 and 15 minutes, which is of course off the five minutes I'm no human clock, but it's still way less than the usual 55 or 90 minutes.
I'd like to know if people have different perception of passing time or how they perceive time when taking medication.
It may be a very common thing I don't know, I wanted to share this sensation that I perceived during the last weeks. :)
Also about Concerta, is 54mg a noticeable bigger step up from 36mg compared to the step up 27mg to 36mg? As in duration, effects, focus, time to kick in, etc.
Thanks all! Have a great week! :)
Edit: I have read the rules and don't believe I break them. I'm sharing my obsession with time and how I've felt and perceived it over the weeks I've been taking medication, not sharing misinformation (which is the only rule I think I could come close to breaking). The last paragraph was a side question I just thought of last minute. :) | ADHD |
When extremely depressed and without substances to numb myself, I can bring myself out of a funk by looking at violently dead people online. I don’t enjoy it at all, but I think staring at it and focusing on it distracts me from my negative thoughts, and maybe I feel like “at least I’m not that person.” By the time I’ve processed my thoughts looking and thinking about these horrific images, what was bothering me before will have passed.
I wonder if it is somehow overwriting some inner ptsd with new ptsd 😵💫 Whatever it is, it works once in a blue moon. | depression |
Like listening to a ton of music or having on shows or something at all to distract from the constant pounding of thoughts in your head. Like if I don't have anything on it feels like there's a ton of mush in my head and I try to remove all of that by consuming loads of content on in the background to try to drown out whatever is going on in your brain. Sometimes my thoughts get so loud I can't like drown them out which sends me into a panic of sorts. I dunno if anyone else is dealing with this kind of thing and I don't think I can explain it very well but I wanted to know if anyone else was dealing with this kind of thing. It's just really scary and hard to deal with and it makes me feel overwhelmed. | ADHD |
Sorry, I know no one cares, but this is the only place I can safely talk about this stuff.
I've recently been diagnosed with OCD, and my doctor says I lean more towards "Pure O". My obsessions mostly revolve around poisoning and sickness. Lately, my intrusive thoughts have been BAD. Like, can't sleep bad. Can't have fun with friends bad. Can barely even eat bad. Cause when I do *anything*, an intense cycle of intrusive thoughts will send me into a panic attack that can last from a few minutes to a couple of hours. The only thing that really helps is playing games, so that's what I've been doing basically nonstop the last couple of weeks. Barely eating, barely sleeping, barely showering.
I just want all this to fucking STOP. I want to be able to eat a good meal without fearing it's poisoned. I want to drink with my friends without thinking I'm about to die. I want to be able to take a SHOWER, for God's sake, without stumbling out, shivering and crying because I think the water has acid in it.
I know my family sees me doing this, and thinks I'm just being lazy, but I can't tell them any of this. Well, maybe I could tell my sister, but my dad is out of the question. I haven't even told him I've been diagnosed, I'm afraid he'll think I'm making it up or I'm a hypochondriac or something.
I've been off meds for over a year now, and I was doing fine for a while. Well, not fine. I stopped because I fell down a self destructive cycle, and have been in a state of deep depression on and off since then. I just don't know what to do anymore. | OCD |
Like the above, as stated, it making me really regret conversing with others in general. Including all family members. Not just immediate. Anything I say, is then resaid by them, and rebuttaled into confusion.
For example (as of earlier today):
I bring a conversation starter about how my mom and grandma would love to stay somewhere else (55+ community with tons of activities for folk their age bracket, current town we live in do not have much for them) and be themselves without being bored like now. Because I see my mother stressed and then relaxing via chatting with neighbors. Cue my grandma (whom is fully deaf in one ear & 50% deaf in her right) getting angry that she just said, "Enough about us being in a nursing home! You always mention that about us! Im about to tell your mother!" She has a huge problem misunderstanding anything even when your ontop of her actual ear. She refuses to get hearing aids at all.
Afterwards, my mother enters the house, and gets mad aswell. Grandma goes on a verbal rampage and starts staying things about me being negative "everyday" (which never happens realistically) and brings up a bunch of things just related to me as an "everyday" occurence once again.
Once this anger session is over, my mother is now threatening me with a host of things. Including being kicked out. All over her misunderstanding with what i've said in one second. END of example.
Anyways, not once did I ever mention "Nursing Home" even once. Never referenced. Nothing said at all. I try to calm down them both down yet they insist i always cause problems "everyday in the house." I am typically quiet, never leave the house unless getting small groceries, nor do any illicit drugs or any excessive alcohol. Yet a small miscommunication error gets me more in trouble then possibly doing said things. Finally, if a situation like above gets bad enough, i try to leave so they can calm down and that involves even more trouble. This happens with anything i say within any type of conversation. News, music, media, video games, board games, and many more subjects. The above was just the most recent example used.
If anyone despises me for saying this then obviously you never read this post to well. If you view me as an ahole? So be it, just comment, and leave without actual feedback.
Edit: Thank you for all the replies and views but as of now i will not be reading anymore of your posts. I just wanted to release this anger i had then at the moment. If anyone stunmbles here plewse know that this aspie is happier then this usually! | aspergers |
I'm just upset and hungry but refuse to get up. It feels a little maddening, I know I need food and need to get up but part of me feels like its throwing a tantrum. Like part of me just isnt happy with anything like a little kid that really needs a snack but denies that they are in fact hungry. And then theres also just the depression. Nothing feels motivating enough to get up and I'm terrified to spend money on anything but groceries bc I already overspent this month and am running out of rent money. I just want to feel like I'm living again instead of surviving. Lately I've been getting little spurts of feeling like I'm "living" and I want it back so badly. | ptsd |
Hi All,
As an ADHD person, I'm struggling with doomscrolling which is making my grades go down the hill. Thus, I decided to download site blockers until I realized they made me want to now visit social media, even more, I guess FOMO is real.
A friend of mine told me to try a browsr extension called BeTimeful which basically only takes the newsfeeds & recommended videos out & makes it very hard to turn it when you get distracted. So far it's been working better than traditional apps. I was wondering if you guys are using it too & how it's working for you? & what other innovative tools do you recommend me to use? | ADHD |
My computer and car need repairs and upgrades, I’m 16 and I’m tryna find a good part time job to finish high school with. I wanna avoid fast food cause it looks too fast paced for me, but it feels like all the other options like grocery stores are gonna be too slow for me. Anybody know of good first jobs for a teenager with adhd like me? | ADHD |
One of my daughters died suddenly a few years ago and a year later my son was diagnosed by a research project with a rare disorder (rare as in fewer than 50 cases worldwide at the time). I have been a bit overanxious about any health issues since, especially my remaining daughter.
I attended a conference last year which included a presentation on genetics and I left with an uneasy feeling about the possibilities arising from some of the concepts raised - but as neither of my degrees are medically related and at the time of my son's diagnosis we were specifically told our daughter had no higher risk I thought that I was just over-analyzing and being paranoid. My anxiety drove me on though and I needed to prove to myself why I had to be wrong so I read up on the studies and spent hours with research papers (and medical dictionaries to understand them) learning as I went.
What started as an effort to prove my worries wrong ended up with me convinced that the findings from the research project regarding the cause of my son's condition were more than 99% likely so i probably was being paranoid - but that there was some small room for doubt. That doubt lead me to request the referrals necessary for her to be tested.
Got the result last week and I was hoping that I would prove that I was suffering from anxiety over nothing for the past 13 months - but turned out the stressy part of my brain was actually right.
It would be so much easier to get my anxiety under control if the world did not prove it right. | ptsd |
Anyone else so sick and tired of OCD being glorified so much. I grew up thinking that OCD was having a beautiful neat and tidy room and wanting your pencils to be straight and orderly, i never saw OCD as a negative thing, i literally didn’t even see it as a disorder.
I’m now on my way to an OCD diagnosis and OCD therapy, and struggling with OCD has been one of the hardest things ever and it has completely taken over my entire life.
This disorder has changed my entire life, and not for the better. Everyone always says try to find the good in your disorder but no matter where i look i have found absolutely nothing good about OCD ever.
I’m so sick of phrases like “oMg i hAvE sUcH aN oCD tHinG aBoUt tHiS”
Being annoyed that your desk isn’t straight or something isn’t OCD. And yes, people with OCD can get annoyed over those things and sometimes have OCD attacks over them, i have done so in the past, but that doesn’t define the disorder.
How have some people been lead there entire lives not even knowing OCD is a disorder? Instead thinking it was just a quirky trait.
Please tell me i’m not the only one frustrated by this. | OCD |
I find that ASD is really useful in explaining the gripes about my life that I would want to change; whenever I run into solid looking advice about life something in me tells me "oh, that's for neurotypicals, it wouldn't work for you". I couldn't exemplify it but I'm sure you'd understand. | aspergers |
I’ve personally had lots of issues with very annoying people in my personal life who don’t seem to respect my basic requests that well. For instance they’ll just come into my room without warning while I’m working on things or reading a book and it’s incredibly annoying. Sometimes they purposely come in to bug me and tackle and hit me just so they can seemingly get reactions out of me or for some other reason they don’t bother to explain. I’ve tried locking my door or placing up a “do not disturb” sign but they still won’t listen to me. How do you handle situations like this? Because I personally hate getting lots of stress from these things. | aspergers |
So the main thing talked about when it comes to Autism is how it is very under diagnosed especially in teens and adults when it should be, and that is very much true, however what I wonder about is everything else that gets pinned on in addition.
This thought comes mainly because I used to be called, in addition to ASD, ADHD, OCD, with speculations of some other things, but after getting reassessed and having tests done again, it was found and clarified that I didn’t have OCD or ADHD, I only had MDD (so just depression) and ASD. The reasoning the clinical psychologist gave mainly has to do with the other half of autism less talked about, being Restricted and repetitive behavior. That’s what most “OCD” was. The “ADHD” that even other professionals believed was mainly due to the same RRB, but specifically the cognitive inflexibility, which is another major element of executive functioning that can result in similar effects, not getting work done namely. My depression just exaggerated all of this. Social functioning as well, but for me this is a bit less so, as I’ve somewhat figured out how to get by as many people with Asperger’s have.
But I didn’t make this post to just talk about myself, my thought after this, especially as I sat on it and learned more through books, research papers, and just talking with my ClinPsych, is how true these conclusions might be for others. When I asked my shrink about how common it is to actually see, say, someone with autism that also has ADHD, he said it’s very rare, and he has never seen a case that wasn’t just an unnecessary diagnosis better explained by solely ASD.
I don’t have an exact point per say, or a real claim to make. I just find it… odd. I just wanted to know what other people may think or have found in these regards. Basically, I’m just wanting to start a discussion of sorts. | aspergers |
Since my trauma, it’s become impossible for me to sleep without having nightmares unless I have my dog. Most of the time the nightmares don’t even feature anything related to the trauma. Does anyone else experience this? | ptsd |
I recently started taking Adderall (10mg XR in the morning and 5mg IR in the afternoon), but I was only prescribed enough to take it on weekdays. I've noticed that, on days when I don't take my meds, usually weekends, my brain feels *so* much foggier, and it's *so* much harder to concentrate. My working memory feels like it's running at 10% power. Obviously, I expect to be more alert and more able to concentrate while on my meds, but the contrast between days when I take my meds versus those when I don't is much larger than I expected.
**I'm wondering if my unmedicated symptoms are being worsened because I'm becoming dependent on Adderall or if this is the experience I've always had and just didn't realize until I had something else to compare it to.**
I know you guys can't give me a definitive answer to that question, but has anyone else had a similar experience? Any other thoughts about this? | ADHD |
Does anyone else have a huge issue with friends, family, doctors and strangers judging you because of your mental illness? Some are just down right disrespectful. Seriously we did do anything wrong to have mental illness. It’s not a choice. Why all the judging? | depression |
I really feel like I am absolutely losing it. We are in a pandemic that isn't going away, but everyone in my living and work environment (save my partner) thinks it's either over, a hoax, or not really all that bad in a post vax world. NO! This is a global pandemic, and business as usual will literally kill people!
I work in a private school, and no one cares about masks or safety. Legit have meetings where adults pull their masks down to talk or fan out the air under their masks. Kids laugh at me when I tell them to wear their masks according to school policy, and when I give consequences earned, parents complain and get their kid out of trouble. I feel powerless and scared and unable to decide what is safe for my body (massive trauma trigger for me). Everyone acts like I am being a major inconvenience for enforcing school rules and my own boundaries on safety. And when I try to keep myself safe, they see me as some conspiracy wacko because I'm vaxed and would "probably not get that sick." Have I completely lost my marbles? Or is society just trying to keep people from being rightfully scared? | ptsd |
My parents get very frustrated because I will be sitting on the couch and they will ask me a question and I will just continue doing what I am doing but not answer…. I hear them clearly and think about the question or what they are telling me but won’t remember to answer. They were asking me to try to explain why I do that but I couldn’t think of a good way to describe it without it seeming rude, is there a reason why I do this? I have been suspecting that I have adhd for some time now but I am scared to ask to get diagnosed because I worry that I am not actually struggling with anything. I was curious though if this could be because of that. | ADHD |
I've been having a nervous breakdown for a few years now.Alongside complex ptsd,self harm,addiction issues,and awful anxiety and [depression.Im](https://depression.im/) also chronically ill physically,and can no longer [work.So](https://work.so/) im stuck at home mostly.The isolation and cptsd is literally driving me mad!I feel like a fucking LOSER as nobody wants me and im mostly alone.I manage to get out the house 4 or 5 times a week,if my agoraphobia lets me.I am also very [claustrophobic.Im](https://claustrophobic.im/) looking for a bungalow in warwick or leamington spa.But council bungalows are hard to find.And i cannot afford private [rented.Plus](https://rented.plus/) because my landlord thinks im not keeping her house tidy enough,she has threatened to give me a bad reference,like she did back in may as i found a bungalow i was going to move [into.So](https://into.so/) i lost that propert because of [her.My](https://her.my/) cptsd gets badly triggered by my neighbours one side,as they have harrassed me for over a year now.And ive had to involve the community police several times.I feel really depressed,anxious and unsafe [here.As](https://here.as/) well as getting a lot of suicidal thoughts.I don't have the means to kill myself right now but i wish i did.Although a very small part of me doesn't want me to die.I really have had ENOUGH.Anyone else identify?ive tried literaally EVERY coping strategy to help me,and nothing [works.Im](https://works.im/) going to therapy twice a week,which is keeping me alive. | ptsd |
Nothing yet. How long until I should feel some results?? On 100mg anafranil | OCD |
Hey I’m in this Facebook group that is for spouses of people with ADHD.
I have ADHD and so does my husband. And I am shocked at the amount of people that don’t understand their spouse. All they do in there is complain all day about their spouse. I honestly feel it’s so sad. Like grow up and have some awareness. ADHD is not fake.
Any comments ? Haha | ADHD |
I've always been an lurker but now I want to be straight up honest. For legal reasons the stuff I say may or may not be true. When I was around 12 I discovered porn and stuff like that. But I wasn't attracted to older people then so I searched for people my age and found nudist stuff to masturbate to. Later at 14 I thought I was so smart and I got into dark web stuff but only watched people around my age pleasuring themselves and never any rape shit. I did that til I was 16. Then I stopped and never came back to that. Now recently (I'm about to turn 17) like 2 months prior I was watching porn on an admittedly sketchy foreign clear net site while jerking it and came across some videos of girls who were 13 at best and I didn't wanted to but kept on doing it and came. From there on the regret started. I went back to this site I think twice to test myself but I only masturbated and came to normal porn after checking if I still felt aroused. Now it just kept getting worse and worse and the guilt about all my wrongdoings is literally killing me. I also jerked off and got hard a lot more often during all those years to girls my age or people 18-30 years old so maybe I'm only partly a pedo? Everyday I am afraid when I see younger students at my school and I ask myself do I find them hot or not? My dick is basically broken at this point and gets hard to whatever it feels like. I don't want to be like this. But everytime I try to tell myself it's only POCD I remember that I used to watch CP in the past and that I already sinned. Is there still hope for my soul? Please be honest with me. | OCD |
I need advice. Also, if you have a personal story of success or improvement, I would love to hear that too.
So bf has PTSD from a crazy ex that tried to kill him a few times. He also was sexually abused as a child. Both are horrific traumas, and I understand why it has affected him this way. I found him a therapist and have been supportive in any way I can. I also talked to him about talking to a pysch to see if meds would help, he agreed, and I'm making the appointment for next month. We're also starting couples counseling next month. It would be sooner, but he's been out of work for a few weeks because of a back injury, and I need a month to catch up on our bills.
I'm bipolar, but I'm amazingly stable for the first time in my life, mainly because of medication but also many lifestyle changes. Because of my own experience with PTSD (I also suffered horrific abuse), I have been able to guide him quite a bit. Therapy helped me a lot, but the main thing that helped me was medication. However, my case is very different because of my disorder; idk how much the things that helped me, would help him.
Idk what the proper term for it is, but this PTSD episode started when he began EMDR therapy for the sexual abuse. He also told me about the sexual abuse, and he has never told anyone. Both of these things have made him spiral. I feel like he is consistently on the verge of being triggered and breaking down.
He has been getting better recently, thank goodness, but it was a lot worse from August-early November. He did a lot of hurtful things, and to be honest, I was on the brink of leaving. He's the kindest, most patient person I have ever met, other than my grandpa. I've always loved how tender and sweet of a person he is. But at the worst of this PTSD episode, when he was most erratic, he yelled at me and even cursed at me once. Also, both of these instances were occasions where we weren't arguing and it was a misunderstanding. I had an instance where I was crying over my dead grandparents, and he stormed into the room and starting ranting about how I was "trying to pick a fight with him". Literally made zero sense, and was so confusing at the time. I now understand that one of his big triggers is when I am upset, cranky (from being tired from work), or try to talk to him about something that hurt my feelings; basically anything that can be perceived as unpleasant from a significant other. This is because of his crazy ex that tried to stab him every time they argued. I want to clarify that in these instances, I'm NOT being rude to him or taking out my anger on him. basically, if he senses that I'm upset about anything, he gets triggered, and has often lost control. Crying, ranting (almost too quick to understand), refusing to let me clarify the situation, etc.
It has gotten better the last month, but it is still hard. I can handle it pretty strongly, now that I'm medicated and stable, but it is still hurtful.
On the other hand, I also feel a lot of pain watching him be so broken. After he is out of the episode and calm, he will apologize, cry, and curl up on my lap. I feel like he becomes the vulnerable little boy he was in those moments. It is extremely hard to watch, and I want to help him so much.
I want to point out that he is trying very hard, and has managed to reduce these episodes a lot. I understand that doesn't excuse the hurtful behavior. It's a complex situation.
I would appreciate advice. Even tips that I could pass on to him, or the couples counselor. My therapist suggested that I join him for a session with HIS personal therapist, so that she can guide me on how to better help him. | ptsd |
I have this weird thing where I am good at talking to everyone but when it comes to silently walking by I feel awkward tension, and I feel like I am forced to fill the silent air by saying hi or a random question even though it seems forced and not organic. Similar instances happen when I have to get close to someone to grab something or do a task. I’m trying to combat this flaw of mine by trying to break as much tension that I possibly can with said people through organic conversation. I was wondering what tips do you guys have on this. | aspergers |
I'm in dire need of some intellectual stimulation and I love listening to people talk about things they are passionate about.
Please tell me what is currently fascinating you!
Update : Thank you so much for sharing your interests. You are all such interesting people. Much love to you all x | aspergers |
Nine Inch Nails - Right where it belongs
See the animal in his cage that you built.
Are you sure what side you're on?
Better not look him too closely in the eye.
Are you sure what side of
The glass you are on?
See the safety of the life you have built.
Everything where it belongs.
Feel the hollowness inside of your heart
And it's all
Right where it belongs.
What if everything around you
Isn't quite as it seems?
What if all the world you think you know
Is an elaborate dream?
And if you look at your reflection
Is it all you want it to be?
What if you could look right
Through the cracks?
Would you find yourself
Find yourself afraid to see?
What if all the world's inside of your head
Just creations of your own?
Your devils and your gods,
All the living and the dead
And you're really all alone?
You can live in this illusion.
You can choose to believe.
You keep looking but you can't find the woods.
While you're hiding in the trees.
What if everything around you
Isn't quite as it seems?
What if all the world you used to know
Is an elaborate dream?
And if you look at your reflection
Is it all you want it to be?
What if you could look right
Through the cracks
Would you find yourself
Find yourself afraid to see? | ptsd |
They said that I'm emotionless and i don't have love for anyone except myself. That i didn't "return the love my father had for me"..
So that's how you fucks really saw me huh? I'm just an emotionless piece of shit who cares about nobody? You know what, that's right i am. I don't have a bit of love for any of you idiots who call yourselves my family. What's there to love about you all anyway? Am i just expected to have a strong bond just because it's "family"? Get the fuck out of here.
I can't believe my fucking ears. I JUST passed by the living room and not even 4 fucking minutes later I'm being put down by you. What the fuck, guess i wasted my fucking energy pretending to have the slightest care about you all. If this is what you think of me, then fine, i WILL not bother acting all nice and warm then. If I'm expected to show a ridiculous amount of love just to be seen as a normal human being then fuck it.
I only ever loved my friends. Family can fuck right off. What a fucking shitty family.. | depression |
May sound like a stupid question; but something happened to me as a kid, didnt exactly involve me per say, but ever since that day/night; ive always been suuuper jumpy, and have certain feelings at night even if im in my room; could anyone help with my question? | ptsd |
And this is coming from someone that was fortunate enough to have gotten an early-ish childhood diagnosis. Granted, for me a large part of it was because I was initially diagnosed with aspergers because my folks told the psychologist that I didn't have a speech delay and this was before the DSM-5. I vaguely knew that Aspergers was an AS disorder, but every time I tried looking into autism itself, just about everything made autism out to be this horrible, home-wrecking Bad Thing™ with just about none of it being actually aimed at me as the Autism-ee, so, at the time, I thought, well, that's totally not me then 😬
That, and everyone around me took my "aspergers" diagnosis as meaning me just having weird bitch disease, basically, and thus a lot of my struggles were discredited, so yeah, it took me quite a bit of time to fully accept myself as an autistic person.
Sorry for such a ranting post, I just have a lot of thoughts on the subject, haha. Basically, I was taught autism was a bad word, so I kind of refused to think I was autistic for a while. Can anyone relate? | aspergers |
Hi there,
My whole life I've struggled with my memory. I'm in my 30's now- diagnosed with ADHD (and autism and complex trauma/ PTSD) and medicated with dex amphetamine. I am back at university now and I am struggling with taking large tests especially. Even though my focus has improved a lot since my meds, my memory hasn't at all. One moment I can learn a concept and really understand it and then an hour later it's gone like it's never happened. I can't remember anything.
What can I do to improve this? I am really struggling and wish I had a way to address this issue!
Thanks! | ADHD |
My PTSD is getting really bad, I had to quit my job a week after going back because I was having constant panic attacks and severe depersonlization.
Right now I have a roommate but I need to get my own place because he is purposely triggering me but I don't know how I'm going to do that if I can't even work a job. I don't have insurance so I can't go see a therapist or get medication. I feel like I have no options and feel completely hopeless. | ptsd |
I was diagnosed in the nineties as a kid and finally sought treatment last year. After trying a few things, I feel my regimen of 15mg adderall 3x daily works really well for me. But I’ve noticed that over this year my nightly glass of wine has become an essential part of my evening routine, and is often 2 glasses. And my occasional evening cigarette has become a daily thing. I’ve been managing the irritability I experience when the stimulant wears off with this ritual (plus an hour alone). I’m wondering how others manage this in a more healthy way—I’m looking into adaptogens. My always-low blood pressure has gone up and I know something has to change, but I want to make whatever lifestyle changes I can before I consider changing my meds, which I am terrified to do! | ADHD |
I have ADHD but I'm not medicated (yet). I used to self-medicate myself with snus (12mg nicotine per pad) and energy drinks when I was driving long distances (over half an hour) and with snus and alcohol when I was with friends (like going out or visiting or something).
I have been pregnant for about 6 months now. I haven't took nicotine or alcohol during the pregnancy because it was planned, I was careful and I knew I was pregnant about in 2nd or 3rd week. I plan to take medications after pregnancy is over.
So I can't take snus or energy drinks and my motor restlessness is getting really annoying and unbearable. It's sooooo hard to drive a car now. And I can't go out anymore because I just can't stand or sit, I'm so terribly restless it almost hurts.
Any ideas how to cope with motor restlessness? | ADHD |
I had no idea what ocd truly was until recently when i experienced trans ocd at the age of 20. I am still not diagnosed, but I hope it is/was ocd. At high school i had a "phase" where i never let my friends or strangers to touch my stuff at school.
I'd be irritated if my friend scooted my school bag a little,I'd memorize how my school bag is perching on the desk to see if anyone touched or rummaged through it when i wasn't around.One day i had to go to the toilet so bad, but i could not bring my phone with me, so my friend offered to hold it for me. After a lot of pondering, i myself put my phone in their chest pocket, looked them in the eyes and made them promise that they wouldn't touch it. Needless to say i came back halfway on my way to the bathroom, and got my phone back. It wasn't that i was afraid of germs i just didn't want anyone's hands on my stuff. I believed it made them less as mine(for a lack of a better wording).It was like i knew their handprint was on it, and i didn't want that?
Was it a type of contamination ocd? | OCD |
I have pmdd and I’m a week before my period. My depression and exhaustion are so bad right now. I’m constantly tired and have dark circles and I’m extremely anxious. I know it’ll get better but it’s hard right now, I wish it wasn’t so bad. | depression |
I've been a member of this subreddit for a while now, even though I hadn't been diagnosed with ADHD, the posts on here just resonated with me.
Time and time again I've been told by doctors and psychologists that they don't see anything "off" about me, that they didn't see any reason to let me get tested for ADHD. They never asked me any questions about why I thought I might have it or what I struggled with.
Because of this I started to think that I might be overreacting or even faking symptoms. I continued to struggle silently in my every day life, not knowing how to deal with myself. This led me to spiral into a depression I didn't think I could ever get out of.
Now, a month ago I finally got to talk to someone who took me seriously and got tested for ADHD. Yesterday I got my results back and turns out I do in fact have ADHD (not surprising at all).
I can't help but be upset when I think about how my mental health worsening to the point of me contemplating ending my life could've been prevented by someone just listening to me and taking me seriously. | ADHD |
Every human brain has a unique profile of how it processes, curates, stores & retrieves information.
Many (or perhaps most) of our brains in this community share one proclivity in particular, and that is our tendency to love learning via deep dives and comprehensive exploration of interesting topics. In my case, I’d even go so far as admitting to being a _hoarder_ of knowledge. Whether our interests are broad or narrow, we seem to share a feature in our wetware which allows us to derive great intrinsic joy and satisfaction from learning new information.
**The purpose of my post today is born of a personal frustration which never leaves me: I am forever unsatisfied with my ability to organize and maintain this information for the long term.**
Perhaps some have perfect photographic memories. I am not myself blessed with such a gift.
Therefor my life is forever a mess, symptomatically presenting as:
* My reading list grows faster than I can consume books, and attempts to prioritize = fail.
* My browser bookmarks folder is composed of a file tree so broad and deep that when I need to retrieve an information source, it’s oftentimes faster to just Google anew rather than find it in my immense directory.
* My Apple Notes app is a mess and while it’s easy to pull up and contribute to, it lacks so much functionality I could sorely use to make the most of my personal information library.
* Likewise, my apple photos library is a laughable collection of screenshots which are utterly impractical to ever find or retrieve again later.
* I rarely have my browser open with less than 10 windows, and less than 24 tabs in each window.
...These are just a few examples of the manifestation of this particular struggle in my life.
**So, I write you all today in hopes of creating a resource for ourselves and others like us in the future to be able to share and exchange our individually developed systems for storing and maintaining information.**
**My Prompt to You:**
* Do you relate to my problem/frustration?
* How do you *conceive of or conceptualize* this problem?
* What are the primary tools or systems you use personally use to resolve this information overload problem?
* Do you have different struggles related to this same general disposition? If so, what are they?
I have been trying to find a better system for years. I want to build a [second digital brain](https://i.imgur.com/2UzptPL.jpg) and never need any tools outside of the system in which I began it, so that it may last and continue to grow for decades to come (ideally).
I have thought about making a personal Wiki. I love the concept of [Mindmaps](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Mind_map) and have tried every single software I could find, including [The Brain](https://www.thebrain.com/), [Mindomo](https://www.mindomo.com/), [FreeMind](http://freemind.sourceforge.net/wiki/index.php/Main_Page), [Xmind](https://www.xmind.net/), [TaskHeat](https://eyen.fr/) and [so many more.](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_concept-_and_mind-mapping_software)
I have more recently tried some new note:mindmap hybrid models, such as [Roam Research](https://roamresearch.com/) and [Obsidian](https://obsidian.md/). I am quite impressed with these two tools and these are the best systems I have yet found.
That said, each of the note systems, mindmaps, wikis, hybrids, etc that I mentioned, and MANY more that I did not explicitly mention, each have shortcomings of one form or another which leaves me too reluctant to commit to one.
What I want is a digital second-brain which I can adopt, build, and never need to migrate from. A truly excellent system that satisfies all my needs:
* **Cross Platform.** I want this system accessible on all my devices. Personally, that's iOS family (iPhone, iPad, MacOS) but ideally would also include Linux and Windows.
* **Highly Flexibility** viewing the same information and relationships between information units from different customizable angles. For examples, I want to navigate the same information both as a mindmap, or with a click I am then viewing it as a wiki hyperlink network, etc. *Ideally, this system would reside atop of a* ***native Graph Database****.*
* **Very low UI Friction** for adding, modifying, navigating or accessing my information.
* **Data and File Agnostic.** I want this system to be able to include arbitrary file types, even if that means an exotic file is not able to open on a mobile device. I'd like to be able to embed web pages (at minimum previews for hyperlinks), images, videos and files, each regardless of whether they are on the web **or stored on my local machine or personal cloud, etc.**
At this point (for further context of my question) I am considering writing my own software to solve my problem.
This would obviously be a tremendous, perhaps even *daunting* undertaking which I don’t necessarily want to resort to, not least of which because I may just end up wasting ungodly amounts of my time.
So my goals in asking this question are twofold:
1. Ideally, learn from others what I am missing. If I can come away from this discussion with a much better system that I never thought about before, one that satisfies my needs, you will have alleviated this brain of its longest standing torment, and I will owe you a great debt of gratitude.
2. If there is no existing workable system which satisfies everything I want, I will still learn from each of you things that I should consider implementing in my own system.
Now, if my digital focus on these systems is alien to you, please don't feel like your systems/methods are irrelevant! **I want to hear about ALL types of systems - perhaps** ***ESPECIALLY*** **those I am completely overlooking or failing to adequately consider!**
All feedback is appreciated, and as a broader final note: I really appreciate this community. It’s so nice to be able to read along with other people that I so closely relate with. You guys are awesome. | aspergers |
I had the chance to pitch for a dream gig - one I'd have sold my soul for. I was so excited that I started work right after getting the email.
Then hyperfocus kicked in. Instead of turning in a short pitch with future ideas sketched out I worked non-stop for three days. Ended up going way beyond what that asked for and turning in far too much work with all sorts of suggestions for extras.
It wasn't quite what they wanted and, essentially, I scared them off.
It's really obvious to me _now_ what a mess I made of things. I've trained myself for years not to do this. But in the moment my stupid brain was too excited to notice what I was doing.
Opportunity lost. I could kick myself. | ADHD |
Sitting is a trigger, anyone figured out a way to reduce sitting-related lowering of serotonin?
I already figured:
* breaks
* maintaining a better posture, e.g. not looking downwards or upwards
But I still find that the whole activity of sitting is problematic. It's the passivity and crookedness to the body that seems to lead to non-optimal breathing and blood flow.
This also leads to compensating effects by:
* drinking more coffee
* using more supplements
When I still think the sitting itself is the problem.
But as I work with IT, I sort of have to sit. | OCD |
I have noticed that when I delay seeking further reassurance I tend to feel a bit more satisfied with reassurance I have already received. Can anyone else relate to this? | OCD |
The wait is over, I’ve waited so long for an appointment to be seen, after being referred to an ADHD team in my city by my doctor, I was told I would have to wait over a year to be seen so that I can be properly assessed. But today was the day and it’s finally done. I’ve been diagnosed with Combined ADHD, and I’m meeting with them again in a couple of weeks to get started on medication. Feels like such a relief, I can finally start getting help. | ADHD |
I've been complimented many times by women for my looks but when it comes to getting a gf I've never been successful. I'm 27. | aspergers |
I basically scribble on random pieces of paper and working out consistency in art style and materials has always been overwhelming.
And when people said "make an etsy account" for my prints my brain short circuited like where do i even start? And when I tried it wasn't as easy as people thought, either. I posted on art forums about paper options and the overwhelming response was "stop overthinking" which... well, that's ADHD.
Anyway, from printer problems and millions of packaging options and working out cheap bulk buy vs expensive one-time materials involved genuinely agonising decisions, working out all the elements took months . BUT I made a shop yesterday and posted it to friends today!! (I forced a deadline on myself by announcing on instagram that I was going to open a shop soon which helped me focus)
Honestly, it's pretty embarrassing to do it this way - I'd rather post it to a void of strangers than people I know - but I'm proud of myself for overcoming that perfectionism/embarrassment of vulnerability AND making a whole ass shop learning sooo much about packaging and design along the way.
Also, classic ADHD vibe: BEFORE i settled on etsy, I designed not one but two websites I don't even use and started coding because I can't stop making things a million times more complicated than they need to be.
I don't think i can post it here but wooooooooo celebrate ! I don't even need another order i did what i set out to do and that's something | ADHD |
I missed my medication last night and whenever that happens my intrusive thoughts get far worse and my anxiety is nearly unbearable. I feel incapable of doing my job a lot of the time and it’s just hard battling the fact that I feel like coworkers are going to think i’m just lazy or something. Do any of you feel like doing your job is nearly impossible sometimes? I’m just.... exhausted. and since i’m only 22 people where I live just assume I want “handouts” as they say. like no i just have crippling fear all the time lol. There’s no real point to this post I just felt like rambling on to stop crying at my desk rn. | OCD |
I was having a good day. I all of a sudden got thoughts and ideas to order plastic removable book covers to protect my books from bending, dust, and ripping. I noticed I have a plastic book cover on a dictionary to try on a different book for reference. I was careful to not bend the front and back covers while placing it on the sleeve of the plastic cover. It ended up being too big but found the next size online that would be a better fit. When I went to my room to put it back on the bookshelf, I noticed small bending in the corner of the front and back cover. I was so frustrated and upset because I was really careful testing out that book in a plastic book cover. I now can’t stop think about the bends on that book and I regret testing it out in that book cover. I keep getting the image of bends in my head. It’s extremely annoying and I also have a headache from overthinking about it. | OCD |
Like I wrote in the headline, sometimes I wish, I could switch my lifespan with someone who is at their death bed but still want to live. I'm 22 years old now and the first time I suffered from depression was with 8 y/o. Currently I'm on Anti-Depressions but damn. I really don't want to live anymore. But I could never take my life my self because my sister would feel extremely guilty and her life would be destroyed as well. So many times in my life, I already wished for a life threatening disease or an unavoidable accident etc. So... Why not switch lifespan with people who want to live? How is it, that others force you to live your life even if it's not what you want. Hate it. | ptsd |
I havnt seen very many good suggestions on how to ease harm ocd, I’ve been diagnosed with ocd since I was really young but just in the last year or so it started turning into pretty typical harm ocd, and the thoughts get very invasive at some points during the day, it sucks thinking you are crazy sometimes cause you have so many thoughts about hurting people that you don’t think you would do but your brain always tells you there is a possibility. Any suggestions? I’m honestly open to anything I cannot stand this shit. Also if anyone wants to just talk dm me, it helps to talk to people who understand about it, cause to most people it sounds like I’m insane so I really can’t tell most ppl about it. Fr if you have dealt with this at all please let me know what helps you. | OCD |
I have my bathrobe rope around my neck. I’ve tightened it to the point I can’t breathe and I can feel the pressure building in my head, then released it twice. I don’t know if I want to die. But if it happens, we’ll I guess I die. I just can’t do it anymore | depression |
Hey all, I’m on day 3 of trying Concerta and I have a few questions regarding my experience so far. For background, I’m 19F and diagnosed about a year ago, this is my first shot at stimulants.
First off, I was told that I would lose my appetite and that I would feel like a ball of energy, neither of which has been true. I also find that while it is kicking in (20-30mins after taken) my eyesight is a little fuzzy for about 15/20 minutes. While I feel like I may have a subtle difference, it definitely hasn’t been drastic.. is this good? Normal? Maybe all the stereotypes I’ve heard about what stimulants feel like are people that are using them as study drugs, or people that are over medicated. Would love some input on your experiences first starting ADHD medication! | ADHD |
i think ive reached a new low point with my ocd and its absolutely terrible. i dont feel like myself whatsoever, my girlfriend feels so far away and so do my friends and family, and i dont think my compulsions are helping anymore. i confessed something thats been on my mind for over a month to my gf and i didnt even get that moment of relief, it just went away and immediately latched onto something even MORE complicated because i think its a false memory.
also i just wanna say that im also a girl because people assume im a guy and theyre extremely judgmental?? but im exhausted. im scared and tired and i want it to stop and im so scared of losing my gf too. i think about the things ive done wrong in life and how horrible i feel more than i think about her. i dont even feel like im allowed to love her because of these horrible things my ocd keeps coming up with and it hurts. i feel so alone and it wont stop
tldr can ocd just make you feel like. completely lost and alone and like somethings wrong | OCD |
It's kinda in the process if figuring out whether or not I am autistic, my mum and sister probably are and my mum thinks I am and so does my therapist and I used to think I am but now I'm really unsure, it's kind of a lot but I guess what I need to do right now is just try to understand what it actually is so I've been thinking about special interests. I don't know if I have any because I don't know what makes a special interest and interest, does it have to do with the intensity? What it does for the autistic person? Or where it stems from?
That's the main bit the rest is just background info about my own (potential) experience with Special Interests. You can totally skip it.
I think I can pretty much look back on my life and break it down into dominant interests except it's more like for example, from ages 13- the beginning of 15 I was super into political theory (I've always had really good obscure interests lol) but what that was would change? Like for a little bit I was super into anarchism and tried to read as much of it as possible and I loved the aesthetic of anarchism though idk if I ever really considered myself an anarchist but I do just really liked it as a philosphy I guess. I read up on it and watched video essays and launched into monologues about it with the slightest provocation and I think it's because anarchism as a philosphy is quite fundamentally about questioning everything and I've always been very questioning, I need things to make sense to me so the anarchist lens felt comforting and familiar. And then it was libertarian right ideology, I don't think I got as much into it as with anarchism bc I'm very staunchly anticapitalist but idk it's just interesting to think about and break down.
I'm realising I'm starting to go on unnecessarily but like save for being super into r/pcm and r/jreg and actually unironicallly listening to Jreg's music and watching all of his videos (my identity was pretty much built around being libleft) I don't know if it really permeated my life? The more I'm talking about it the more I'm realising it probably did but I still feel like an imposter acknowledging that or calling it a Special Interest. I always find a way to bring the conversation back to political theory and it was much worse when I was younger but sometimes I wouldn't sleep because I was thinking or reading about a certain thing and I found it difficult to socialise if I wasn't talking about it. But now I think I'm function just fine in normal conversation, I take turns and I listen and I contribute and everything though virtually everyone I know has mentioned a very clear difference in me talking about politics vs about literally anything else. So idk. | aspergers |
Kinda of curious how common this is, and if anyone knows why this is? Also if anyone else who is the only sufferer sometimes doubts they have OCD because they are the only sufferer? | OCD |
I understand rumination would be the complusion, but would ERP also reduce the anxiety from triggers and the rumination itself? I guess if it did, then you technically wouldn't need the complusions like avoidance, rumination etc right? Just learnt about ERP very recently. | OCD |
The side effects mentioned in ADHD and gaming addiction overlap.
Side effects like, deficiency in the part of the brain that controls impulse control. And reduced inhibitory control, which is also said to be a problem with ADHD. Less self control is an issue in both of these fields.
Do we have adhd or is it gaming addiction? What is it that seperates the two? Do they multiply each other?
What are your thoughts and knowledge on this? | ADHD |
Hey everyone, first of all I do have a therapist but she never "taught" me any skills or anything else actually. She kept me dependent on her and my ex all the time. But since my ex is my ex, i (of course) cant rely on others bc i dont have any friends that could help me calming down or getting my thoughts clear again. Sure some could try helping me, but i would overwhelm them in actual crisis situations, so i need to learn what to do on my own. I even asked my therapist today (funny story aside: she told me we just have 7 more sessions bc insurance isnt covering any more therapy) if we could finally make a plan so i know what to do. Like.. instructions during a breakdown. She didnt help me with that, so I am asking you guys now what y'all do (on your own) if you are in a breakdown/crisis/meltdown etc. Any circumstance where you cant think straight or need help in any way but dont have anyone on your side so i can try doing a "crisis instruction plan" on my own. Thanks in advance :) | ptsd |
we all know this is fucking exhausting and hard but we all never gave up u are strong i have stopped but still get memories of them but u guys now need to stop no matter how hard it is u need get control not ur ocd i know that when ur brain is lying but u can't resist it can be agonizing but u guys are stronger then ur ocd | OCD |
So I live in Hawaii. I’m newly diagnosed and a mom so I’m running around a lot but don’t know the state laws about my medication.
Specifically, does anyone know if I need to keep my meds in its original bottle (like if I were in Texas) or can I put it in my little water proof metal pill thing?
I’ve been looking in google and haven’t had success despite putting in the search bar 5 different ways.
Thank you for your help! | ADHD |
For those of you with diagnosed ADHD and living in the UK, what is the process for seeing a psychiatrist and getting your prescription?
I live in Australia and have diagnosed ADHD and am prescribed dexamphetamine. I am looking at relocating to the UK for a few years to do some locum work but am trying to work out a few things first.
I am worried about if I can first of all bring in my dexamphetamine and then how I will continue to have my prescription. There are several month waits for initial appointments with psychiatrists where I live and I am worried about running out of my medication. I would be in the UK for a while so would definitely need to be under a psychiatrist whilst there. How does it work to see a psychiatrist in the first place as well, here we get a referral from a general practitioner to then have a consult with a specialist, is it similar there?
Thanks! | ADHD |
I’ve had depression since I was a little kid so I never know if I’m unhappy with the people closest to me or if it’s a me problem. | depression |
I have started to watch anime and I have become fixated with some of the characters and find them attractive. Some of them are a lot younger than me and I feel like I’m a sexual deviant or something. Some of these characters are my students age and now I am having intrusive thoughts that I find my students attractive. I fucking hate it and have been in tears over it. Fuck man! | OCD |
I just graduated and started working, and dealing with intrusive thoughts during work has been really stressful so when I finally get off, I usually smoke some weed to discharge and get my mind off of things. This would be nice on its own, but the weed is keeping me dissociated, in my head, and a little on edge so it becomes harder to talk to the people in my life and my relationships are suffering. If I’m by myself, it’s not as big of an issue but it’s not realistic for me to just not talk to anybody after 5 pm. I wanna quit but I’ve become dependent on the weed to make me feel better and it’s holding me back from recovery. The easy answer is to just quit, but the intrusive thoughts are so much harder to deal with and I feel much more emotionally numb the first couple of weeks of quitting and it fucking sucks. Fuck man, idek. | OCD |
I’ve got such a tendency to say outrageous/offensive/bizarre stuff that I’ve resorted to viewing social interaction as more of a chance to fuck up tremendously rather than an opportunity to connect with people and form relationships etc
It’s a really pessimistic outlook but it’s not one that I can easily shake.
Any advice? | ADHD |
Exactly what the title says.
I know I have no future and thus I also have no long term goals. Really only short term stuff to look forward to has been keeping me going. Most notably is that I had an appointment about starting HRT scheduled far out from when I called to schedule. Soonest I could get was months away. This wasn’t the first time I tried either. I made it to appointments and was in the process but my parents stopped it since they don’t agree with transitioning. Figured now that I’m mostly on my own I could make it happen, and there were even resources on campus.
Well, the day came and it was disappointing to say the least. Not only is the next appointment months out, by the time I would start receiving any sort of prescription I would be with my parents again. I wouldn’t even be able to go get it. I don’t have a license or a car (my parents refused to let me have a driver’s license, and I couldn’t just go take the test because the walking distance is unreasonable. Public transport isn’t an option either. Living in the middle of nowhere fucking sucks. Regardless, I’d need a car to take the test in the first place.) Same issue with the required bloodwork. I wouldn’t be able to actually physically get myself there.
Additionally, since I’m listed as a dependent under my parents insurance the payments for the hormones would be visible to my parents, who would put a stop to it. I can’t pay out of pocket either. I don’t have the money or any income, and I’m in no shape to work.
That was the last thing I was looking forward to. Now I just feel empty. What’s left? What do I do? Why am I still even alive? Why continue? What am I living for?
I’m too stupid for any education, and I have failed my first semester of college. My parents wouldn’t give me another chance (understandably so, they paid) and I obviously can’t afford to pay for college on my own.
Even then, I just feel no interest towards any career and I loathe the day my life becomes nothing but work. That’s not a life worth living. I also know that I can’t handle the stress of a job. I’ve worked a variety of jobs starting at 14 and the stress just ruined me. One job had me so stressed it was physically just destroying me. I couldn’t even work because I would just collapse.
So what do I do? There’s nothing for me. There’s no realistically achievable future nor a future I would even want to live through.
I really do just have no choice other than to kill myself, and that in of itself is another challenge… | depression |
@mods please let me know if this violates any of your rules and whether I can reframe the discussion in order to not violate because I really need to discuss the following with someone.
I’m almost 25, I’ve had depression since before I was a teenager and for the last five years I’ve been trying to focus on the sensation of depression. I’ve been trying to nail down exactly what I’m feeling that culminates in depression. At first, I had the bias that the sensation was psychological, that I could get past it by changing my mindset. However, after I resolved many of my biases and unhealthy thought constructs, the depression persevered.
For the past two years I’ve been focusing on the physical sensation of my depression. It’s a kind of dull, light pain or itch somewhere behind my eyes. Recently, after crying, I realized that this sensation was radiating from something connected to my tear ducts. Sometimes the sensation would move to the root of my brain and sometimes deep into the ear, but for the past three months it seems to mostly stay by my tear ducts.
I woke up today extra sensitive because of a hangover with that unpleasant sensation going strong. What fascinates and flusters me is that I’m currently able to influence that pain. I can actively relax my mind and face and that itch of exhaustion doesn’t hurt as much (its still there though).
I don’t know why I’m writing this. I looked into joining a depression study but got turned off by the idea of taking experimental medicine. I want to try to figure out why this sensation of depression is coming from my tear ducts and whether I can do anything about it. | depression |
When I first got ocd, I did not love my ocd my ocd was fucking terrible, I controlled it easily after a couple of months, what I realized is this ocd is always based on 1 certain fear that drives a bunch of different intrusive and compulsive behaviors. Now there can be 2, 3, 4 or even 5 fears at once. You will not indulge in both at the same time, as the imbalance is only made to eat at one thing at a time. You may have 2 fears at once answering one then shortly after the other. But this is rare, we are talking about 2 different fears meaning the root of the intrusive thoughts and compulsions on one thing. Now we know exposure and response therapy where you take one of these roots, when they come to attack, you then let the anxiety completely overwhelm you to the point where it can’t overwhelm you anymore. The root will then not be watered each time you do it causing the plant to die (your ocd). But as soon as you get rid of everything there’s always something that your ocd needs to hook on to. Instead of letting it hook on to the worst thing possible. What I do is I find something myself that makes no sense and is not something I will be crying myself to sleep about. Which never happens anymore. Find something stupid convince yourself that you are Superman and every time you get the thought that your not just keep saying you are while embracing the anxiety. Not only are you totally uncontrolbut your not obsessing over anything you can’t handle therefore it’s easier | OCD |
Fucking hell... why didnt anyone tell me adulting is shit. I (23F) just finished my second degree. I have applied for *28* job opportunities... applying for everything that I qualify for.. and *2* came back to me but I didn't get the job. I fucking thought the whole time I just wasted my time and I'm not going to be successful and just turn out to be everything I said I wasn't going to be, I am going to be a failure. I am crying as I am typing this because I give up. I am so fucking tired of cryung and putting myself out there and no good news. Just tired and wish someone prepared me for adulthood | depression |
Hi everyone! I've been taking my scabs out since more or less when I ''gained'' ADHD. The same goes for biting nails. A while ago I even had a needle on my desk and sometimes I just ''perforate'' my skin with (on the first layer of the skin, no pain felt.). On the ''taking scabs'' matter I'm starting to gain what I think are permanent scars on my legs, and my nails are always super ugly. Can anyone help me on how to stop doing those things? | ADHD |
I was diagnosed about a year and a half ago. Been in and out of therapy looking for someone I clicked with and finally got in with someone good. I’ve had flashbacks in the sense that I would constantly think about what happened, but now they seem so real. Like I feel like I’m actually in that room being held down again, and can see everything clearly. Therapy has given me some coping skills, but they don’t seem to work too well for this, so I was wondering how you guys deal with them? I’ll take as much advice as I can get | ptsd |
It's not just any oat meal it's, full of fresh fruit and nuts and all sorts of stuff. If I made it myself it wouldn't be anywhere near close. And you can say, it's 'just oatmeal, eat something else'... but it's taken me days to get my stomach used to a new regime and it has been working super well. I'm upset that now the established pattern will be broken and I'll have a hard stool tomorrow :(
But I guess it's good for something. It's made me realize that I need to be able to feed myself without relying on other people. I need to learn to cook for myself, but that includes grocery shopping, and that's a whole new nightmare.
I guess eventually I'll have to grow my own food, so I'm not dependent on other people to function. It's becoming a daily stress factor how to get fed, and which place to go or how to do it, that's the least sensory impactful.
Society is not designed for me. | aspergers |
I had a breakdown in front of my friends today and they were so supportive and wonderful but my anxiety is making me worried that I looked crazy in front of them. My anniversary was this past weekend and it was rough and today was so rough that as soon as my friend asked if I was ok I started to cry. Again they all seemed to have understood but afterwards I just felt worried that they’re going to see me as crazy. I hate using that word but idk how else to describe it. Does anyone else get anxiety with seeking support in friends/family you know will support you because you don’t want to look as bad as you feel? | ptsd |
We didn't exist when I grew up. They were confused by me. There was intervention at school but I was abused nearly to death by my parents for being called out. It was as if they had handbook on what NOT to do and say to an ASD kid. I like to think in today's world that my parents would have been counseled but these are broken people. I'm pretty sure the abuse would have been different but just as bad if not worse. Or they would have used it as an excuse to have me institutionalized (which they tried to do anyway.) For most males who grew up before the Dx existed, I've been told we had about a 50/50 chance at a decent life and it hinged on having at least one parent who understood them. I'm really hopeful this ratio has improved dramatically. If you have been Dx young, do you feel it helps or hurts? If it isn't helpful, why and what could improve the situation for the ones coming up the ladder behind us? | aspergers |
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