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i recently moved schools, it began by people wanting to be friends w me bc im (somewhat?) attractive, 7 months later all the "friends" i had ditched me because im so weird and say weird things without realising. now i have no one nd go days without saying a word to anyone cuz no one cares enough to talk to me | aspergers |
Emotional abuse or something else?
Not a relationship but a relationship with my dads ex-fiancé and I
TW: possible abuse, long passage
Hey, i( 17F) am having trouble getting the correct answer for the things I went through with my dads ex-fiancé, his then fiance.
He had been with her for about 7 years and ALWAYS had to have it her way. We saw them 2-3 times a year ( they lived across country from where I was ) she was very negative about my mom and would say things in front of me I didn’t need to hear. For example, calling my mom a wh*re for cheating on my dad when I was little. Another example was when we were thinking of going on a cruise I worried about getting sea sick like my mother had. She responded with “ that’s something you choose to do. Don’t be a chicken like your mom “
Here’s where things got bad:
3 years ago I had knee surgery and she tried to have my fly out to see them. Total travel time would’ve been 13 hours ( by myself ) whike I was still in a knee brace and on crutches. My mother told her it would need to wait a few months due to the fact I was still healing and I needed constant dr check ups. She threw a fit and said she was going against custody papers. My
Mom had the Dr call her to explain it jeopardized my health and that it clearly states in the papers that I could travel to see my farher so long as that it didn’t interfere with my education, health, or safety. We won.
2 years later I had to have mouth surgery and my mouth was in a lot of pain until I got the surgery I needed. She threw a fit saying it wasn’t an emergency and I had to wait for my surgery.
Well, she started to seem to get better and realize her issues. And after long deliberation I had moved in with them for better education, ( private school ), begger opportunities, and that’s where both sides of mg family were so I had support. It was going prettt dang well. After a couple months, she would say rude things when my dad was at work about him, and she used to get mad when he would spend his OWN money ( about $100 ) a month. She didn’t work and would blow money on useless stuff.
She got her kids school stuff at the mall and got like at dollar tree and my backpack from a thrift store.
I had the most chores and was never allowed to do anything. She started letting me and her daughter ( was 13 at the time ) smoke were with her. I was 16 so I knew my
Limits but still very idiotic and I was very naive. And she invited a guy over ( who flirted with her and made clear to my dad she WOUDK never have him over unless he was there ) while dad was at work. Dad got mad and this caused problems.
Here’s the real issue with me;
She got COVID around the time my mom came down to visit. I did my social distancing and did what I needed so I could see my mom. She kept trying to stop me. However, I had to watch her 2 youngest ( one is a toddler and one is autistic so it was very hard ) cook, clean, homework, do what she needed, laundry, etc. well one day it was veryyyyy chaotic and so that house was messy. She flipped and told me she hated me and “ f you “ then stormed out. I ended up posting a meme she took directly to heart ( wasn’t even about her but I guess if the shoe fits ) this caused a long night. She refused to let me talk to my mom, kicked me out then claimed she didn’t when I tried to find somewhere to stay, cutting Wi-Fi chords, slamming doors. It got so bad I told my mom to take me somewhere or stay or I was leaving. She called my dad and told him she was gonna run her car into the ocean and it was my fault. The only person who answered mf calls or texts was my then boyfriends mom. Dad agreed to take me and he did. From there she told my dad have fun being a grandpa in 9 months ( it’s not like I was there for fun ) , she threw all mf stuff out and ripped pictures of mine, and then called the cops on me for “ running away “ I ended up going back for 2 weeks ish till mom got there. I hid a phone to keep in contact and I stopped eating from being so anxious ( lost about 15+ pounds ) she told me she loved me a forgave me ( as if I did anhrbing wrong ) but turned around and talked mega crap on me for 2 goirs on the phone next to me. My mom came to pick me up and she tried stopping me. I left, and she made a group chat with my entire family in forming them I chose to ljve with my mom because my mom was manipulating me to moving back. She told me I had 24 goirs fo her my stuff or it was being Theown away. She kept what she wanted of mine for her daughter. Since then she has attacked me on Facebook, stalled me, created new accounts, and even stopped so low to take her daughters phone and text me ( confirmed by my dad ) and has currently put my little brothers life at risk. By speeding 60+ in a 15 while he had no seatbelt. My dad came to visit me in the state I’m in and she flew out here! She didn’t come to directly where I was at but claimed she wanted to see the state since she has always wanted to. She also told me my grandpa died like this “ I have good news and bad news. Aunt ***** is pregnant. Bad news, she will never be able to tell
Your grandpa because he died “ he got into a wreck and tried to say “ he probably killed himself because he couldn’t take on the responsibility or more children in his life “
I felt guilty for a long time as if I did something wrong, and had nightmares about being held captive in the house. To this day she still does shir to my family and we can’t get away because she’s the mother of my half brother. My dad even had her baker-acted.
What kind of behavior is this ? | ptsd |
Not sure if anyone else relates to this, but since October of 2020, when I started having s3xual intrusive thoughts, it seems like my confidence has plummeted. In terms of like how I see myself in terms of looks, personality, strengths and etc, I feel like I see myself in the mirror now and I’m like eh. The same goes for dating, I’ll see someone I find really attractive but my mind pops in and goes “but are you attracted to them? Your really not, your attracted to no one, and even if you were you can’t hold a conversation with anyone romantically so shut up”. And these thoughts have been driving me crazy it almost seems if there’s something like wrong with me? It’s really hard to explain but it’s been distracting me almost every week since I started having these thoughts. I’m not sure what to do 😔 | OCD |
i’ve been depressed my whole life. when i was a kid i’d beg god to just let me go, not to heaven or hell just let me not exist. my mom is bipolar and it has led me to so much trauma. i’m so lonely and i live in my head. i am so focused on my looks and the guy that broke my heart, it’s so stupid. the sick thing is is that i was happy once, like genuinely i thought that i got better. now it’s came back but this time a billion times worse. i have being alive but everyday i have to fight to live. please say something to take the ache away <3 also if you’re feeling this way too i hope i don’t project any negative energy onto you. i want us all to be happy so badly | depression |
23F from UK. I have been struggling to cope with various mental health related issues since childhood and after over a decade of fighting for some form of diagnosis to help me make sense of my struggles and to try to get the most appropriate support, I was diagnosed with inattentive adhd just over a year ago. This has given me some clarity, I definitely have been through periods of denial or believing I was misdiagnosed, however I have mostly come to terms with it now, which is actually somewhat thanks to reddit because the adhd groups have shown me just how much I relate to others with inattentive adhd. However, as much as I agree some of my most prominent issues stem from my adhd, I feel as though there are still some pieces of the puzzle that are yet to be slotted into the picture. ADHD has a lot of potential co-morbidities. I struggle with anxiety (which I take the max dose of propranolol for, which helps somewhat reduce my physical symptoms) and low mood/depression (have tried many different anti-depressants over the years, none have ever helped) which are some examples. OCD is also a potential co-morbidity of ADHD.
Before I received my adhd diagnosis, one of the routes I was sent down to try to find out what I was dealing with was a personality disorder clinic. I was told there that my test revealed that my problems overlapped with several different conditions and we weren't able to go completely in depth into everything, as with most nhs services, we were restricted to a certain amount of appointments to determine a diagnosis. However I specifically recall the psychiatrist noting that some of my answers were suggestive of OCD, but in the end it was never discussed particularly deeply and I wasn't as self aware as I currently am.
At the beginning of this year I was put on methylphenidate to try to help my adhd. I am still on methylphenidate but it has had no positive effect on me and I am on a pretty high dose now so I would've seen any positive effects by now. I have an appointment tomorrow with my titration nurse who prescribes my adhd meds and it is very likely she will begin the process of weaning me off them to try something else. If anything, my struggles have been even more intense and difficult to deal with lately , however it is hard to tell whether this has anything to do with the medication as I'm going through a particularly stress inducing time (moving out for the first time, which I want to do but I find change very difficult to cope with + pandemic). I reccently read an article that mentioned that people with adhd who have co-morbid OCD find their OCD symptoms are exacerbated when taking adhd meds (if they have not received any former treatment for their OCD).
After some research and self analysis I have come to the conclusion that it seems pretty likely that I do also have OCD (an example of one of my OCD suggestive issues is compulsive skin picking. Even when I realise what I'm doing and tell myself not to do it I just cannot stop myself and end up causing myself pain or even leaving scars. I can copy and paste a rough list of things that I do that seem to be suggestive of OCD in the comments). However, I was wondering whether it is worth going through the hassle of trying to get a diagnosis? The process of getting my adhd diagnosis was very long, drawn out and emotionally distressing but in the end it was worth it, particularly because it opened up the opportunity to try out medication that might possibly help me that I wouldn't have received any other way. I'm wondering what support is offered for people diagnosed with OCD and whether others who've gone through the process believe it is worth pursuing?
Thank you for reading if you've got this far, otherwise check below.
TLDR: what support is offered for people diagnosed with OCD? Do others who've gone through the process believe it is worth pursuing? | OCD |
Has anyone else been delayed proper diagnosis because you were successful in school/work?
I mentioned this in a comment over in r/adhdwomen, but something that really frustrates me, especially as someone in the mental health field, is the outdated and archaic criteria doctors/PAs/professionals find themselves using to diagnose ADHD. Someone had posted that a doctor told them they couldn’t have ADHD “because they were in college.” I had a similar experience with the first doctor I saw seeking diagnosis.
I have two Bachelor’s and an MSW. The whole “you wouldn’t have even graduated high school with ADHD” comment just really gets to me. Struggling in school/work is absolutely a symptom of ADHD, but /requiring/ it to be is so limiting and awful. You can’t fit ADHD into a box, and quite frankly, professionals trying to make it fit into a box is why so many people (especially women) go undiagnosed or are well into adulthood before diagnosis.
I (27F) was diagnosed about six months ago. Adderall XR has changed my life. I got straight As until college. I just had to work harder and longer than my peers because I was operating at like 40% capacity, especially in undergrad and grad school. I pulled more all-nighters in the library than anyone else I knew in college, because my work and studying simply took longer and was more difficult for me with my lack of organization, loss of focus, frequent breaks, and distractions. My work wasn’t lower quality. That’s how my ADHD manifested in my experience, because once again, everyone is different and is affected differently, and you can’t fit ADHD into a box.
It’s dangerous for those diagnosing ADHD to have these outdated and frankly incorrect misconceptions about ADHD and capacity for success in academia/workforce.
Sorry for the rant, I just think about how much my life has improved since being medicated and get frustrated with these awful preconceptions about ADHD that limit people getting diagnosed, especially from professionals. | ADHD |
idk what else to add - i hope you're all doing well | ptsd |
I'm loosing my mind
Can't deal with loneliness anymore | depression |
Recently got diagnosed with depression and it’s be downhill since then. I started going on antidepressants- 20mg Prozac to be exact, and as the days go by I’m slowly starting to barely recognise the person I’ve become. I think back on old memories of how I used to be and that person seems so far away as to who I am now and I just find it crazy how depression can literally feel like your soul got taken away from you. Sometimes I feel like all I need to do is turn on a switch in my head and I’ll be back to my old self that had the motivation to live life again, but at the same time it feels impossible. Everyday is a constant struggle on wondering whether if it’s finally time I let go of everything. I wonder how long I can keep going? Will I make it back to the other side again some day? Or will I eventually fade away? | depression |
so i was fapping, i was reading a fanfic of kpop idols(which i already have a problem with) anyway i decided to look up one of the dramas cause i wanted to read a fic on a certain couple, anyway while fapping i looked up the name from mydramalist, there where two different people with the same name, i accidentally read the descripton on the google search of the other one, but i kinda ignored it cause the other person unfourtanantly passed away, anyway i went to the page i was actually searching for found the drama, and looked it up, there wasn't really anything for the drama fic wise.
i was having ruminations about the other person who died(not in anyway sexual) but i had to finish cause like, ruminations actually get worse if you stop, anyway after i finished i looked fully into that page as a search compulsion to see what actually happened, cause the first time i only saw the words "was" and "passed" then i clicked on the actual person i was looking for.
my intrusive thoughts are kinda killing me, basically saying i was fapping to the other person instead, which i wasn't.
i already have a problem with fapping to fics about kpop idols and stuff, mostly cause i feel creepy doing it and i hate it afterwards.
anyway its like 2 am now so maybe if i sleep ill forget about it, it usually helps whenever im having ruminations and intrusive thoughts. i usually forget about it when i wake up. | OCD |
Hi,
I've been dealing with panic disorder, depression and OCD for 18 years. Tried many SSRI's lastly Paxil (which made me emotionless and stopped working). I've been on 120mg Cymbalta for 8 months. Much better side effect wise but not quite helping with the panic disorder. My psych suggested I add Anafranil. So I've started with 25mg at night. My doc wants to up the dose to 150mg. I've read many place even 25mg could be enough. What are your thoughts? | OCD |
So I was prescribed Vyvanse, and it works fine (I think — it’s hard to tell what functioning normally means when I’ve been like this my whole life). Anyway, if I miss even just ONE day, the next time I take it, I start to get a racing heart and shaky hands which almost always leads to anxiety. After a day or two of taking it regularly, these symptoms subside, but does anyone else experience this? It’s just so annoying that if I forget a day, I know I’m destined to be anxious the next time I take it :/ | ADHD |
Has anyone ever tried eye movement desensitization reprogramming??? Does it work?? My therapist recommended it to me and I’m on the fence | ptsd |
I’m embarrassed that I’m this mad but I am. I’m so tired of losing shit. They were $130 AirPods and I don’t feel normal without them. I think I left them at the gym and someone may have returned them but I won’t be able to find out until tomorrow. Does anyone else feel like they can’t function without having them in at some point? I’ve always been like that and get really upset or feel unsatisfied without them. Even if I’m not listening to something the sensation of having hem in my ears is comforting in a weird way? | ADHD |
I’m about to make a drastic decision
I need advice or to talk | depression |
An year ago i started suffering from pocd, and since then my life was hell.
Despite never feeling attracted to girls even three years younger than me suddendly i felt like i had to look at children or young teen to test myself until i was sure i wasn't attracted to them, and when there weren't any around me i still constantly tried to bring up those memories again or imagine sexual situations with them to test if i felt aroused until i felt satisfied with the result.
This continued until i started having panic attacks when i couldn't reach a satisfactory conclusion, and at that point i understood i wouldn't make It through by myself and went to an ocd expert in my city, since after researching a lot on the internet i found out a lot of what i was going through coincided with pocd.
After talking with him the therapyst confirmed to me that i almost certainly wasn't a pedo and It was pocd, and after going to a few session with him i started feeling better.
Recently though i remembered that even before having pocd i fapped to loli hentai (among other, more normal stuff) and the panic started getting to me again since i couldn't see why i would be aroused by them if i wasn't a pedo.
Sometimes i manage to calm myself but whenever i see a post about loli on reddit where everyone says that people who fap to lolis are pedophiles (which are pretty much daily) the anxiety spikes all over again.
I can't even avoid them because if i don't use reddit because of that my minds tells me i'm just avoiding the truth and gives me even more anxiety.
I even talked about my masturbation habits with my therapist before the quarantine, but i can't remember what he said (even if i do remember he didn't condemn me) so i can't even use that to calm myself down.
What should i do? | OCD |
does anybody else ever feel “in the mood” almost for a certain sensation? for example, i have this lip gloss that i absolutely love the smell of (the only reason i have it), but right now i’m completely overwhelmed by the smell of it, so much that i actually gagged. i wonder if other people experience something similar, not just with smells but for example bright lights or loud noises. i know it’s pretty common to be overwhelmed by sensory input but i wondered whether other people felt like it could fluctuate?
i don’t live in a place right now where i have many resources about autism, i’ve read a lot online but i figured it was such a specific question so i wanted to ask personally | aspergers |
Honestly I'm tired.
I've had to fight to get an NHS referral, received a letter today in the mail. Was excited thinking it was finally the appointment letter I was promised initially within 3-6 months of submitting their requested paperwork.
Instead I received a completely depersonalised letter advising at minimum to expect another 6+ month wait as a result of Covid. Plus another 12 on top of that for the autism assessment my GP requested.
I just want to get better and I wouldn't have been so upset if I wasnt sent a leaflet labelled "waiting well" (I think I misunderstood it's meaning and got offended by it) and I hadn't been referred during the pandemic in the first place.
I feel like the NHS has pushed back against me so hard at every step of my mental health issue. My private medical plan won't cover neurodevelopmental disorders, the governing body of my city also won't allow me to submit private assessments to the NHS for prescriptions that way.
It's killed all the excitement I had for getting some tattoo work tomorrow, cost me half a day off work and I'm still bouncing from mad to upset mood wise. | ADHD |
So I really, really like writing. It’s one of the strongest passions I have for whatever reason, and I don’t know if it’s because a lot of stims that I do have, have to do with my hands, but either way. That being said, I have unmedicated adhd (I have to get re-diagnosed though, because I lost the paper that my old psychologist gave me), and one of the biggest “symptoms” I have is all of motivation. I was wondering if anyone has advice for me to trick my brain kind of, to help me get started on things I want to do? Because when I was on medication for my adhd, it was easier to get started on things and stick to them. Until I have enough money to go to a therapist/psychologist again, asking for advice is my next best option. | ADHD |
After learning more and more about adhd and anxiety I'm pretty sure I have it. I relate to so many things about and many people close to me have recommended I see a psychiatrist so I can at least be diagnosed. But I've never been to therapy before and my health insurance isn't that great so I can't just go to any office. I've seen a few offices and profiles of those I can go see but I have no idea how to start.
Advice I'm picking a good therapist? And once I'm there how do I even start? And how will I know if this is a good therapist that can be trusted? Help | ADHD |
I think this is a concept that nts inherently understand that we don’t pick up on, mostly because the foundation is forged in narcissistism and stupidity.
While nts know better than to upstage their egotistical overlings, the ever-helpful aspie will come up with a clever solution, flaunt its superiority in front of everyone, and wind up embarrassing and pissing off their superiors. Then the aspies are shocked that they aren’t getting any kudos.
So even though the aspie solved the problem,they get passive aggressively punished for stepping out of rank while having no clue what went wrong.
Nts seem more skilled at making it look like the boss came up with the idea, because they understand their place in the pecking order and when and how to brown nose. While we just see problems and solutions, tending not to see the politics involved, nts play the game and win. Aspies just want results, fairness, and efficiency, which should be the scorekeepers in a perfect world.
Does anyone else feel like they unwittingly repeat this senario? Has anyone else been pushed down for standing out? | aspergers |
I am so alone that if I left this earth, nobody would know for days, very likely weeks. I’m just ready to be gone. | depression |
I’m trying to get my hair long and beautiful bc I’m just that vain, but I keep twisting it until it stays twisted in a sort of dreadlock thing. I think it’s what’s making my hair so messy and frail, but I just don’t have any other outlet for whatever drives me to do that. So, any ideas? | aspergers |
Hello everyone. First post in this sub. I really need some advice on things I can do to be a better partner.
I am a “your worst nightmare” kind of girlfriend. Diagnosed PTSD, BPD and ADHD. Every moment of the day I put all my effort into not allowing these symptoms to disrupt my life and the lives of those I love. I have come extremely far. I am 26 now and never thought I’d be as healthy as I am. However, I fall short so often that it looks like I’m not trying at all.
I am ridiculously inconsiderate even though I WANT to be. Here are some of the things I do regularly:
Lock my keys in my car.
Struggle to keep up with laundry and dishes etc.
Jumping in bed without checking if I’m gonna crush his legs.
Being messy with food.
Knocking over cups and bottles.
Dropping food as I’m trying to eat it or knocking over the plate entirely.
Not be careful with my keys and metal water bottle when I get in his new car.
Putting my feet up on the side door or somewhere else than the floor in his new car.
Failing to realize the things I can do to prevent these things moment to moment.
Etc.
List goes on, you get the picture.
As far as the BPD and PTSD go, we’ll, it just makes me that much more pleasant to be around. I am an emotionally reactive mess of a person who lives in a cloud of shame about the fact that I can’t control it enough. As a result I suppress 95% of my thoughts and feelings which, in turn, creates a perfect recipe for disaster. I don’t even convincingly suppress them. It’s just awkward. I am very angry and frustrated and sad about who I am as a person and what kind of partner it makes me.
I’m so in love with him it’s scary. And I don’t even show it in my day to day actions. I try to. But I fail. I give him all my love but I do things that makes it seem like I don’t give a shit. Like I’m all physical affection and lip service. It kills me to be this way. But then I’m mad that I’m essentially telling myself, “waaahhhh it’s sooo hard being a total piece of shit and being inconsiderate and careless towards those I love!”
I know people like that and they’re the worst kinds of people. The ones who want pity for being a bad person. My dad is one of them. He’s a cheat and a lot and many other things but doesn’t try to change earnestly. He just gets depressed about it.
So I feel more shame for being upset I’m a bad person.
Another things I do is tell technical truths and lies of omission. Again, not with the intention to deceive, but because I either forget or don’t realize? Let me explain for example: today I came home from work because I forgot something. Before I left again I smoked 2 hits of MJ. Mind you I learned how to drive this year and have had my license for a few months. He asked me why I’d do that, am I trying to get in a crash? And why did I lie only to be caught in the act?
I was confused and he said I had told him I don’t get high before driving when asked. I don’t consider 1-2 hits of MJ “getting high,” so yes that’s what happened. I smoke a little 1-2 days a week before work. I genuinely didn’t think I was telling a lie but I certainly did.
This is very clearly, obnoxiously fucked up. I don’t know how to articulate this dilemma. I just sound like a fucking liar.
I also recently scratched his new car while parking. Did I think I was being slow and careful and watching? Absolutely. Did I completely misjudge my bearings in the process when I could done things to prevent this? 100%. That’s the same as not being careful.
People will always believe that if you keep doing the same things over and over you don’t WANT to change. You’re content being this way. You don’t actually care. What I’m doing is such a paradox that it’s impossible to convince anyone I’m not just a lying careless person who gives lip service.
I’m so exhausted from overthinking everything but making the same and new mistakes CONSTANTLY. Yes I try!! All the time! I probably succeed 99% of the time because it’s a constant effort. But it only matters that these failures are frequent, repeated, and careless. It doesn’t matter that I’m trying. It matters that I DO THE THING.
Thanks if you got this far, I needed to get this off my chest and ask for advice. While I cannot immediately solve all of these things and can only apologize and keep trying to do better, what CAN I do to be a better partner and make up for it? It’s disgusting how often I say sorry, it seems like I don’t mean it since I do that thing again the next day. I literally can’t stop these thoughtless mistakes. I can work on them but I can’t fully stop. I’m getting better but it still happens. And he is understandably stressed out, frustrated, and feels like I’m making a fool of him. I’m a straight up nightmare and idk why he puts up with all of this. He is kind and helpful and understanding but obviously, as would anyone else in his shoes, he has a lot of doubts about my efforts. Please if anyone can give me some pointers on how to be a better partner I really need it.
I am in therapy and medicated. | ADHD |
I’m having a really really rough week right now. I’m trying a new med, which apparently I’m just super sensitive to medications. (Not looking for med suggestions please but this is relevant) Every med I’ve tried had given me every side effect to make me feel crappy enough to not continue with it. I was taking one for a while but my prescriber wasn’t telling me it would effect my A1C levels and that’s really important as I’m pre-diabetic. So I had to try switching. And this entire week I’ve been sick, nauseous, can’t eat right, can’t sleep, over salivating which is so gross which is making me more sick. Yesterday it triggered my indigestion hard which ended up making me so sick to my stomach I threw up twice. Among other symptoms. So. Yeah. I’ve been like this all week.
So, I just am generally not feeling good. Feeling emotionally drained. A little irritated. But every time I try to reach out to someone and vent about what’s happening I’m getting like one to two sentence responses. Which is just seriously making me feel like a burden. Or like I’m complaining for no reason. Or complaining too much. I’m already feeling sensitive. I just wish someone would understand and say shit, that sucks you’re feeling like that I would feel pretty upset too. Or just try to understand why I’m feeling like this? Idk. Instead of me feeling pushed aside.
Anyone else? | depression |
I was talking to a therapist recently, and when they brought up the idea that my depression is temporary I felt bitter and defensive. Later when I brought this up to a friend online they suggested that I may be wearing depression as sort of a proving medal, like I feel as though I deserve something for being sad and still living rather than fixing it.
And like, it does make sense, all my life I've seen people put in work, and get a reward for it. So now when I'm putting in more work then everyone around me just to live and there's no reward, that would feel wrong.
But like, what a huge piece of shit I'd have to be. How self absorbed and narcissistic would I have to want to stay depressed because I'm looking for some type of prize?
I've had imposter syndrome for a while now, and all this really is making it feel like I'm choosing to be depressed, and like I'm really not. | depression |
[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pBjU3Ii7lfs](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pBjU3Ii7lfs) | OCD |
I’ve been on a 20mg methylphenidate for about a couple months and it works pretty well. No comedown or side effects.
Just this week though I’ve noticed my meds just make me super irritable when I take them and I only feel better when they wear off. I didn’t really change anything beside the time I wake up now (which is an hour earlier).
Any ideas to remedy this? | ADHD |
VERY little neuroscientific knowledge here(can’t focus on academic papers). Total speculation.
I was diagnosed last year because I went to a psych thinking I had “OCD, Anxiety, Depression”. He clocked me as ADHD immediately. I have medication but I often wake up too late in the day to take it.
I caught myself just now doing a compulsive number counting thing while playing a mobile game. The game is one where you complete daily tasks. Recently there was an event with more tasks than usual. I started doing this counting thing after the event stopped, and there were less tasks to do. COINCIDENCE?! | ADHD |
So I'm almost 20 now and I was lonely and bullied at school as much as you can get pretty much. It was hell. I was later abused by both parents and put on antidepressants which f ed me up. At this point my mind kinda went the ocd route where f ed thoughts of a bully and weird shit won't stop. It's like my mind is solidified and won't let go... Ocd wasn't something I had as a kid aka dark thoughts, obsessing about BS, and not being able to process/let go... I'm not here to rant but also to see if anyone else kinda understands or what has helped in little ways. | OCD |
As an aspie that was diagnosed at an early age, ive been pretty introverted my whole life. Now i know that theres plenty of people who are introverted that are not autistic, but is it an autistic trait to be introverted? | aspergers |
My anxiety and intrusive thoughts are getting worse and worse. I've always been anxious about not locking the door/the stove being on, but able to be reassured once I've looked at the stove or seen the door locked. Now I need to look multiple times (5+ times) and even then I have thoughts in my mind like "what if it's still on...what if the doors open" and then my thoughts spiral into the worst case of what can happen
just wondering how anyone has begun to seek treatment for these behaviours? | OCD |
No social interactions feel as good as exchanging information in a dialogue about something both parties are passionate about. It’s quite literally what I live for, what keeps me going, and always has been. I only realized I’m autistic last year (21 ‘afab’ non-binary) and it explained so much about why most communication feels so empty. But now I’m even more aware of how frustrated I always am. I really enjoy working out ideas on my own, but having been very isolated for the past year seeing only my partner and his parents, I am getting seriously desperate for this sort of communication. In high school I was in an academic program where basically everyone was ND and some of my closest friends (who I don’t have any contact with now) and I would just sit and share information, make jokes, bring up topics and discuss them in depth, etc., like every single day. I thought people communicated like that in the “real world”.
I went back to school specifically for this reason (left during burnout) but my courses rarely get to deep discussion. I go to my favorite professor’s “optional” classes but I feel so obnoxious after because I’m the only one who goes, and I’m terrible at reading the cues of when I should let her get on with her life. I talk my boyfriend’s ear off and he simply doesn’t have much to say because my passion is something he isn’t super familiar with, and he is interested in a way, but it feels like I’m just being humored. My cousin is also autistic and we have good conversations where we info-dump to each other but it isn’t consistent and I’m always wanting to talk
more. I end up feeling very rejected and small, annoying, obnoxious, but my head and chest are literally bursting with information.
How do you deal with this? Is it reasonable for me to want more of this, or should I try to redirect my energy?? I feel so lonely. How do you find people into what you’re into? I feel so...abnormal lol. I can’t have a conversation with a random person my age to save my life but I look forward to talking to my professor for days and then end up embarrassing myself and feeling awful about it. I end up getting frustrated with my partner but I understand not wanting to hear about, like, anthropological concepts/extinct megafauna/deep sea gigantism all the time. Maybe it wouldn’t be so bad if I wasn’t expected to socialize the way other people want, but rarely the way I do. | aspergers |
I've been trying to quit for years. I started medication for adhd (lisdexamphetamine) a few years ago. For the past 1,5 years I've noticed that I don't smoke on the days I skip my meds (some weekends, and sometimes longer on holidays or when sick I've noticed I don't really get any cravings and minimal withdrawls). I really don't want to continue/start smoking again (8 days without nicotine atm), my meds help me sooo much I wouldn't want to quit them either.
Has anyone had similar experiences? I have taken a week without cigarettes or medication but took my adhd-meds today and the nicotine cravings are killing me! It's so weird since I didn't have almost any all week! Having thought about this for a few years I've noticed that when I smoke a lot (more than 10 cigarettes daily) the meds reduce my smoking, but if I haven't smoked at all they make me want to start again. Has anyone found any tools to help counteract this effect? Should I plan a longer break from my meds for quitting (I could plan 2-3 weeks for my winterholiday.) I use to have methylphenidate and that felt to have an even stronger effect on my nicotine need (though I also smoked more at that time) so I don't believe switching stimulants will help.
TL; DR Meds are making it hard to quit smoking, tips or peer support would be appreciated! | ADHD |
I take Vyvanse 40mg daily. And I’ve noticed this issue is a lot better now that I’m on vyvanse than it was when I was on adderall. Does anyone else get like gum and tooth pain? I do tend to thrust my tongue on one side of my mouth (where I get the pain). I also noticed bad breath from dry mouth so I started chewing gum but I’ve moved to actually using biotene instead. Has anyone else experienced something similar? Did biotene help? Am I experiencing pain because I have dry mouth? | ADHD |
For me at least I tend to ignore to-do apps as my phone already makes a thousand & one R2D2 chirps daily. And so I was wondering if anyone has tips to actually remember to use them among all the other things I ignore.
It doesn't have to be an app, although a pen and paper would just be one more thing to forget lol. But I need something persistent enough to get past my subconscious. Maybe something with an alarm that can only be turned off after a few math problems? 🤓 | ADHD |
i have ptsd from 2 seperate traumas, the first from when i was 12 until i was 15. by the age of 18 i used to drink to get through the day. i was struggling with that first trauma in jan 2019 because the person in question had been arrested for a second crime. i drank every night on my own in the garden for 2 weeks. mid February 2019 i found my mum after she had committed suicide which triggered a second ptsd diagnosis. i moved in with my sister and didnt drink again after that until tonight. i just had a strong urge to numb things and i drank a few units. I'm worried it will become my crutch again | ptsd |
I’ve been feeling extremely sad and depressed for over a year now, but I have not been diagnosed with depression (have not yet seen a professional).
I don’t know if there’s something wrong with me. There are moments where I will just be triggered over the smallest things (like getting an email) and start being anxious. My mood changes a whole lot, kinda like bursts of energy although most of the time I feel down. I haven’t been sleeping well, most of the time I just distract myself with the internet until I randomly fall asleep. I stopped doing things I liked, there’s really nothing that motivates me, I feel kinda useless and I do not see myself in the future.
Recently I’ve been looking to see if there’s any reasons for this cause I have never been like this (or to this extent). I don’t know if it’s because of stress and pressures I have, but everything else is decent in my life (I have a family, food, roof over my head… things I should and am grateful for). However, I don’t know if I should feel like this or if I deserve to feel like this. In the sense that other people have it worse than me so why am I complaining?
I don’t know what to do. | depression |
I can’t help but sleep during school hours e.g bus journeys, lessons and free periods. It usually happens randomly but it’s now been happening after eating my lunch too. It used to be a joke that I would always have my 3pm nap during lockdown and that’s snuck into my life generally now except it’s starting to become more excessive. I’ve found myself now trying to finish my work and I physically can’t as my eyes won’t stop closing. I’ve had a good 6.30-7.30 hours of sleep recently which is just the right amount usually so im not sure it could be that. Is this adhd related? Are there any tips to give me some energy? | ADHD |
https://www.plymouthherald.co.uk/news/plymouth-news/plymouth-police-officer-says-nightmare-3561922
It's not all Gore and Drama that results in PTSD for frontline services. | ptsd |
do you have stories of success? therapy is too expensive for me to afford and with no free health insurance in the US, i'm at a loss and feeling pretty hopeless. is there anyone out there who has succeeded or are succeeding without therapy? what do you use to help you? | ptsd |
I know that title sounds weird, but as someone with adhd, I feel like I am. When I say this, I mean in terms of the systems we live in. It’s harder to control impulse buying or play games with micro transactions because the temptation is real, and these systems were designed to exploit people. I know it’s not my fault, but I still don’t feel great about it, and I feel bad that others fall into these traps. School systems weren’t made for people with adhd, making it harder for us to get good grades, which then makes it harder to get good jobs and so on. Getting assessed is expensive, so is therapy and medication. I’m glad that things are getting better for those with adhd but I feel like the discussion of systematic changes to help those with adhd is rarely brought up. | ADHD |
\*Trigger warning because it's a bit detailed and I want to play it safe..
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So I have the oh so lovely combination of health anxiety and OCD, and the last two months have been brutal in terms of STI fears.
I am in a long distance relationship but I trust him entirely and have no reason to believe he has been unfaithful and I have ZERO anxiety about if he had. I also know for sure I haven't cheated because, well, I haven't.
But, and this is where OCD is super fun, I am beyond convinced that \*I\* have an STI and have not only have I spread it to him but as a consequence, the *entire household*.
It's making being intimate difficult after being apart for 16 months due to pandemic related restrictions. I'm fine in the moment but now feel like my brain is on fire with worry despite there being no relationship or biological reason to be so consumed.
If anyone has any tricks or tips to dealing with when rational thought isn't causing the brain to send the all clear, please help, any and all advice will be much appreciated! | OCD |
I'm sorry if this has been asked before but I searched and couldn't find it. I did a Telehealth assessment for ADHD and got prescribed meds shockingly quickly. I did try to ask some questions about effects and side effects but I felt I was being rushed along. I kind of have two questions, first, what are the essential things to know before taking my first dose? I saw some mention of vitamin C? citrus? what's with that? What should I watch out for? What should I expect?
Second, I'm actually really scared of being "reliant" on medication and the effects of screwing with my brain. Please don't laugh at me, it's even a reason I've never smoked because I have a lot of fucked up brain chemistry and I'm worried of being addicted to the feeling/effects of medication or self-medicating, even if the medication is not actually addictive chemically. Can someone please reassure me on this? I'm just scared it's gonna be too effective that I'll never want to go without it. | ADHD |
Now I truly know the meaning of going mad. I can feel myself losing my mind and its fucking horrible. I feel like I don't know myself. I convince myself that I'm in a coma, in a mental hospital or I'm drugged out my face somewhere and my life isn't actually my life.
I don't know what is real and whats not. I can't trust myself or my own mind.
Some advice please | ptsd |
Doctor appointment Tuesday for my ADHD. When it comes to it do I ask for medication refills or is she supposed to naturally bring it up and send in the refills even if it's too early?! I know it's early for my refills but do I bring it up like " like are u gonna refills my prescriptions or do I call on the 18th when they're do " advise please | ADHD |
I’m having the worst depressive episode of my life. What sucks is that I’ve had depressive episodes when I felt suicidal when I was younger. Although I wouldn’t say I’m suicidal now, the mental dread is the worst I’ve ever experienced.
And I think it’s because I’m feeling unfulfilled. When I was younger, I could always blame poverty on how I felt. Now that I have some financial security, it feels like I have nothing left to blame. Why do I feel like shit? I can eat however I want now. I have savings. And yet, there it is. Depression.
Every day I don’t have a mental breakdown feels like a massive accomplishment. That’s not normal. I feel like I’m either too honest about my condition and make everyone in the room feel uncomfortable or I don’t say anything and feel dishonest. | depression |
A while ago I posted this on this subreddit;
https://www.reddit.com/r/ptsd/comments/p8uh49/im_starting_to_remember_my_trauma_and_i_need_help/?utm_medium=android_app&utm_source=share
And since then, I've recovered alot more memories. I need someone to talk to because its really overwhelming to just remember so much. It would be great if you were free to talk from 12-3pm est because that's when I'm waiting for my parents to sleep (and its really scary because its when they're the most prone to hitting me) | ptsd |
Hi, adhd is rampant in my family and a cousin of mine just got diagnosed after dropping out of college, she doesn't speak any english so I was hoping you guys might have suggestions for resources in spanish I could send her way.
I'm kind of at a loss, I was the first one diagnosed so everyone has been asking me but I don't have anything :/ | ADHD |
Well, I've been reading about sensory differences in ASD, and I know sometimes it's about hypersensitivity, sometimes hyposensitivity, and sometimes a weird combination of both. I also found that a lot of autistic people report having an enhanced sense of smell, but studies show pretty contradictory data. Some studies show increased smell, others impaired smell, and others show no difference at all with NT people.
So I was wondering if anyone else experiences anosmia/severe hyposmia. I have it and it doesn't stem from any known cause. Doctors have told me that it must be due to allergic rhinitis, but my rhinitis has been pretty much under control since adolescence, and my sense of smell never improved, so right now I'm just wondering: could reduced sense of smell be an uncommon sensory difference in autism? Can anyone else relate? | aspergers |
I drank a little last night and then took my first dose of Ritalin this morning (I know...not the smartest and probably won't do anytime soon again 😂)
Anyway...I don't feel like the Ritalin did anything. Kinda just felt anxious.
Is that normal? Would it be because of the alcohol or maybe my dosage? | ADHD |
My therapist officially diagnosed me with both CPTSD and depersonalization disorder. But isn’t depersonalization just a symptom of PTSD? Or is depersonalization comorbid to PTSD? Or are they truly two separate entities? | ptsd |
I've found a specialist who's working with me even tho I smoke weed in the north of Ireland you can't get help if you smoke weed so I've been left by the service's since a child now I'm 24 and finally finding the right treatment's hopefully after a decade of stress I can become human again | ptsd |
I’m failing my exams. Once again 😔. This shit hurts. Especially when people are expecting a lot from you. Im losing all hope right now. It hurts more when you really wanna do it but just can’t. I have no motivation left after this. What do i do. I procrastinate a lot, am lonely, introverted and don’t know how to get break the cycle. I guess life is just hard for some people. I hate it here. What should i do? Medication also doesn’t seem to help | ADHD |
Recently (about 1 month ago), for a lack of better wording, I've been feeling completely out of place like never before, and I believe certain recent events have been the cause of it.
Up until Halloween of last year, I was stuck in an extremely abusive relationship for 9 months before it finally ended in a dramatic public explosion from her at a party. I was subject to constant abuse after month 3 (mentally, emotionally, physically, sexually), and it was a daily occurrence up until the final day. I don't want to get into specifics as that would be too hard to do, and quite frankly there are WAY too many instances to choose from. It has now been almost 4 months after the breakup. She continued to stalk and harass me for months afterward up until recently, when I finally cut her off for good.
My grandpa had also passed away very recently. It was incredibly hard to attend the viewing and funeral, plus participating in all of the rituals we had to do in his honor (I come from a Chinese family and we had a traditional funeral for him).
I can't tell if my symptoms have only been coming out recently, or if I have only been starting to notice them now.
* More and more frequently, I have been experiencing intense anxiety almost constantly. My confidence has never been lower than it is now. I've always been the outgoing, confident, "easy to talk to" kind of guy, but now I can't even hold a small conversation. Now, I always feel anxious when talking to people and my mind blanks to the point where the conversation ends in minutes, if not less. I can't even interact with my close friends normally anymore. I almost rarely hang out with anybody anymore, nor do I even attempt to do so.
* I've also noticed that I'm extremely hypersensitive and hyper aware of everything around me now. Things that wouldn't even affect me before, now terrify me to no other. Even the smallest stimuli is enough to scare me; things I wouldn't have even phased me before all of this.
* Daily life to me at this point has just become a blur. I could barely tell you what I did yesterday without a lot of thought. I just feel constant disassociation.
* I've had a history of pretty bad depressive episodes, but now it just feels like that all of the time. I've been contemplating suicide more and more frequently. No, I will not do it though. I realize the impact it would have on everybody around me, and death has been added onto my fears now.
* I can't enjoy almost anything I used to anymore. Swimming, lifting, hanging with friends, listening to music, etc. I get almost no enjoyment from any of it anymore. I can't even listen to certain music now because of the association I have with the abusive relationship.
* Speaking of association, I tend to avoid a lot of things from the past that I would normally associate with her. Music, places, habits, etc. Same goes with my grandpa. It's hard to visit my cousins and grandma because of his recent passing away.
* Internally, I just feel anger all of the time, like I'm seconds away at snapping on someone at any time. I know that's not going to happen though; I have an incredible sense of self-control and I have never lashed out at anybody.
* I wake up multiple times in the middle of the night. I wish I could tell what the dreams were about, but often times I forget.
* I've been smoking way too much, as well as occasionally adding alcohol to the mix. Most of the time, I don't even enjoy smoking because I end up reliving what happened to me in the relationship and thinking of things that scare me, like death and loss. A while ago, I developed a terrible habit where I would smoke everyday, but I managed to break the habit up until now.
* I still think about all of the moments in the relationship and feel nothing but anger, shame, and regret. I get hit really hard when I think about my grandpa too, I can't think about him without tearing up. He was a very good man and I miss him a lot.
I believe I have strong reason to think that I may have PTSD, but I would like some confirmation. If you do believe so, please give me ways to help myself. Thank you. | ptsd |
My harm OCD gets pretty bad but I've been having trouble trying to come up with exercises to help. I've tried holding a razor knife, watching/reading violent content, writing out worst case scenarios, etc but nothing really helps. I've been making good use of the SOS feature on NOCD and sitting with the discomfort but that's the only thing so far that seems to do anything for me. It just doesn't seem like enough. | OCD |
I'm a 25 year old woman. Average weight, try to get moderate excersise.
I go through these periods that are sudden where my muscles just DONT WORK right.
My job becomes nearly impossible (It's physical), I get dizzy, my muscles feel heavy, fine motor movements become difficult (like writing or typing) myspeech stars to slur, and I start to shake.
These happen seemingly at random, and very often. Typically Multiple times a day.
It often feels difficult to do day-to-day activities such as grocery shopping or going out with friends, or even clean as a result of the physical pain and fatigue.
I've been told it's probably depression but that just doesn't feel right to me. I've sustained multiple concussions from passing out and the doctors just won't hear me. They say drink more fluids and tried to make me take anti-depressants that made everything so so so terrible.
So many random seeming things have been explained away by autism. I just wanted to know if this could be too somehow. Thanks. | aspergers |
Hello, I'd really appreciate help. I'm a straight girl who suffers from OCD, mainly Real event OCD, TOCD, POCD AND HOCD.
I used to play role play when I was 14-15. It was a Harry Potter role play. I played it with my internet best friend at that time. I had huge crush on Draco Malfoy at that time, so we started to text role play. I played my character and her love interests and she played her character and my love interests. So she played Draco Malfoy and we were dating and stuff at that role play. At that time, I was obsessed with Draco, I read fanfiction, I wrote fanfiction, I played this role play, I watched edits of him, had pictures of him everywhere, I read the books and watched the movies... and I loved discovering things about his character. His character was really interesting to me and I kept finding out more information about him. So basically I was a huge Draco Malfoy fangirl.
My problem is: now my HOCD is trying to convince me that I had a crush on that friend, even thought I was so sure with being straight before OCD.
And my logic is telling me: characters are not people behind them. If I fall for a character from a book, I love the character, not the author. I fall for Draco Malfoy, not J.K.Rowling. If I read Harry Styles fanfiction, I fall for Harry Styles, not the author of that fanfiction. If I fall for Han Solo, I fall for the character, not George Lucas. And so on.
Also, I know it's probably natural, because I felt like it was the fictional character I had a crush on, right? Like when you read fanfiction, you fell like it's the character, not some girl writing him.
But my HOCD is telling me: If you had a crush on Draco, you also had a crush on her, because she was the one writing. Even though it doesn't make any sense, but hey, it's OCD.
Me and that friend stopped talking when I was 15. Now I'm 19. I missed her for 2 years, but in a toxic way. The friendship was really toxic, I used to be manipulative and kind of addicted to texting her everyday and bringing her down to feel better about myself. It was a mistake, I'm not like that anymore. But anyways, I mainly missed the role play, not her.
Before OCD, like a year ago, I completely forgotten about her and when thinking about it, I would just cringe and move on. I even tried to read the role play and our old conversations but it was so cringe I couldn't do it. I moved on. But my OCD is bringing this back to make me suffer.
So I guess my main question is: did I have a crush on the idea of Draco Malfoy or the friend?
Also after I stopped talking to her, I would have a crush on another fictional characters and imagine a role play we would play if we still talked and she would play my crush (always a boy)
Please. I may sound desperate and this post is pure chaos but OCD is making my life hell and I need answers to feel better Please.
PS: This friends is now a trans boy (he/him). I used her (now his) old pronoucs, I hope that's okay | OCD |
See very bottom and skip rest for TL;DR -- hope this doesnt break rule 3.
Im really scared to mention it idk I feel I really relate to a few people on the spectrum (random comments/posts, youtubers, other internet texts) and did like 4 hours of going through a test with my best friend to confirm Im not tricking myself and get the best answers, among other tests. (all pretty high probability).
And I think a lot of problems in my childhood could be explained that way, and it could also be related to (or partially causing) my social phobia.
The contra is that I feel really bad talking about """speculation""", and idk somehow anxious saying it out loud to someone other than my two friends.
So would it be counterproductive to ommit it, and maybe if the time comes mention it later when I have proper therapy? (diagnosis process or whatever right now). | aspergers |
In addition to ADHD/ADD, they're testing for depression and anxiety. I just want to know what goes on during these things.
I was diagnosed previously as a kid and haven't been medicated since 7th grade. I just want to be prepared for whatever may go down, and I'm a bit anxious. Like what tests do they do? What does it look like? What do you get asked?
Thank you in advance for any answers or any advice! | ADHD |
(the prize is feeling good in the morning)
I think it works because it isn't a demand, there's no possibility of failure. It's just a friendly taunt between me and myself
— and if that bastard (me) thinks I'm not good enough to go to bed early, they got another thing coming!!!! *shakes vengeful fist*
(it also works because revenge is my favorite) | ADHD |
After years and years of struggling with deep depression and not knowing why I was mentally ill, i’m finally medicated and getting treatment! It’s day 7 almost 8 of being prescribed 10mg lexapro due to depression and it’s been going good. Very few side effects as they went away the first few days and I feel so much better… but the problem is it’s by a huge amount.
The nurse prescribed me lexapro because energy and motivation is just what I needed but I feel like I have TOO much energy and excitement. I get restless and feel that I need to be doing something even if my brain is just stimulated. I get excited over the smallest things and despite my yawns here and there I feel awake. I don’t get much sleep at all, even when I am sleeping it doesn’t feel like I am. I can stay up all night if my boyfriend didn’t lure me to bed as I just don’t want the day to end.
But with this high energy I’ve always been getting more mood swings and I’m more emotionally reactive to my thoughts and surroundings and cry a lot more. I get over it eventually but my breakdowns seem more frequent even though i feel completely find afterwards.
I know it’s early so this all could just be a fluke but I’ve heard these are symptoms of mania?My nurse has ongoing diagnosis for BPD and GAD but she ruled out Bipolar after considering it fir a moment. Just wanted to get some opinions on my obsessive thoughts. Thank you | depression |
I don't know what's going on that it feels like lately there has been a rise in gunshots where i live and i feel like i can't take it anymore,, everytime i read something about neighbors hearing them or when i remember that one time i heard them it makes me extremely anxious and i start panicking,, no idea how to cope with the possibility of hearing them any longer, the worst part is that nobody knows where they come from or what's the reason behind it, which just feeds into my fear | ptsd |
So. Am I the only one with a HUGE fear of being left? Like I've been verbally abused most all my life, raped, in abusive and toxic relationships. And my relationship now is kind of toxic but none of that matters because all I can focus on is how ANOTHER fucking person is walking away because I'm such a fucking human trainwreck. Like Jesus Chris WHY DID IT HAVE TO BE ME!? WHY AM I SO FUCKING DIFFICULT TO LOVE. WHY DO I ALWAYS HAVE TO BE SO ANNOYINGLY CLINGY AND FUCKING DESPERATE!?! ACH!! I. HATE. BEING. A. PTSD. SURVIVOR. I hate being part of the statistics. I hate the nightmares. I hate the random fucking back flashes I get. I hate that NO ONE who doesn't have PTSD understands and they all look at me like a broken toy. I hate that I'm not a prize to be had now because of all of it. I just seethe so much sometimes. I hate that I can't have normal relationships and I always feel crazy when I spiral. I just want a hapoy life where I am not alone and I'm loved.
I didn't survive it and come out better or stronger and I am so BITTER at everyone who did because all I got was more broken and less functional. Like I am happy for you but why do I always get the short end? The bad hand? I feel like my like is just the inverted tower card for life... okay. I'm done I guess. Thanks for listening. | ptsd |
Hi guys. I feel like something is against me and wants to hurt me. I don’t know what i’ve done to deserve it and i’ve felt like this for a long time. Religion really plays a part in this but i dont know how to feel otherwise. I just want to be normal and think normally like everyone else my age. Why do i have to think like this. Does anyone else feel this way? | OCD |
I have 2.4 CGPA and I'm probably failing 2 courses this semester
I have ADHD Diagnosed by a Psychiatrist
I don't have accomodation
I don't take meds either
I can't really keep up with Assignments, I miss most
In the end it comes to the point that in a Final exam of 100 marks I have to get around 70+ to get a passing grade
Sometimes I do because the last minute pressure kicks in I study 18 hours the day before exams and I pass the course by getting 70
But 1 out of 3 times I can't really make the 70 mark
And I end up getting an F
My parents have a fixed amount of money for college and I can't expect them to pay twice for the same courses
I feel like the next semester would be much better because I finally figured out how to get through a semester but by this time I already paid twice for 4 courses | ADHD |
I'll go first. In 5th grade, I forgot to bring my earphones at school so I asked a classmate of mine (a girl) if I could borrow their earphones and they said yes. When this girl handed me these earphones... It literally had earwax on them... Like, you know the part where the sound comes out from? The ear wax was there and it disgusted me so much and I'm pretty sure she actually saw my face of disgust. 💀
So what I did, I grabbed my wet wipes, isopropyl alcohol, and tissue and literally cleaned HER earphones right in front of her. The fact that I've been cleaning my electronics EVERYDAY (including earphones) since I was in 3RD GRADE and I really haven't seen something THAT dirty of earphones in my life is just kinda overwhelming lol.
So, what's yours? | OCD |
I apologize beforehand if my post is confusing. I have experienced a lot of tragedy the past 6 years and recently.
I witnessed the suicide of my ex husband, my mom unexpectedly passed recently, my SO I was with 10 years ended things abruptly (he's recently come back though), and I was sexually assaulted and almost strangled to death several weeks ago. I know, that's a lot!!
I am getting the correct help for everything and do know this is certainly trauma. I do not experience nightmares to my knowledge so why am I screaming in my sleep? People are hearing me. I told my psych doc today and she prescribed Prazosin.
Does anyone have any insight? Am I having nightmares and I can't recall them? I am even unsure if I have a PTSD diagnosis even though I know I have trauma as that has been stated. I didn't seek proper mental health treatment until April 2020.
Thanks! | ptsd |
I've realized part of the reason I withdraw from social circles, my friends and family's lives or shy away from meeting people is that I'm afraid of getting close with people, having them share their lives with me and then having them realize I can't track the details of their lives and forget important information and dates. So I tend to not invite myself into other people's lives. I understand that part of this is rejection sensitivity, too. But I also wonder how much of that is social anxiety.
What has been your experience with the ADHD, medication, your relationships, and your social life? | ADHD |
I had Schizophrenia OCD last year and it faded by itself. Now I have ROCD/SO OCD but it still is here after 5 months. How is it possible when my schizophrenia OCD lasted maybe one month? | OCD |
We were getting a presentation of a system. It was told that the user gets identified by a token from the source system.
I just could not follow the introduction any further. My mind could not stop wondering what is a token and how the system can reliably identify anyone by it.
After the presentation I asked about the token from my colleague. He had no idea either. He didn't seem bothered about it - I shouldn't have been either. I was. Until I googled it.
The rest of the presentation - I still have no idea. It's like I had gone somewhere else after the authentication slide.
Anyone else? Or is it just me? | aspergers |
My boyfriend (20M) and I (20F) have been together for a year & have been best friends since we were 15 years old. He was diagnosed with ADHD a few years back. I moved into my own apartment before he moved into his and we would spend most (all) of our time at my apartment. Since it was mine I would always keep up with cleaning, dishes, laundry, etc. He got an apartment with two of his friends and now we spend lots of our time there. However, since he moved into it- I have noticed he is not organized at ALL, can’t do his laundry properly, doesn’t take out his trash (overflows), keeps dirty dishes in his room, doesn’t brush teeth if not reminded by me, etc. I have minor OCD and there are some things I HAVE to have a certain way. However I’ll express how I feel about these things and he continues to do it. If I don’t step in and take the dishes/trash out of his room they will be there for weeks. I have to remind him about EVERYTHING. It’s starting to get exhausting because he keeps telling me he will get it together but he doesn’t & I feel like instead of a partnership I have to act like his mom. It’s not even just the way he lives- it’s his personality too, he gets hyper fixated on video games and plays them for hours, he tells me he is going to start his business, or get his GED but it’s been a year and he has yet to progress with any of it. I need advice on what I should do- or how I can help him? I’m not even sure at this point. | ADHD |
i have a physical stim when im stressed which is to hit or scratch my thighs/arms, and i was just thinking does it... count as a form of sh? i'm not doing it for reasons that people do that, it comes when i'm like watching a scary movie or something. i ask because i just watched a pretty stressful movie and my thighs now hurt but again, it wasn't for the purpose to put myself in pain. | ADHD |
Does anyone know any shop that sells stimming toys to germany, or generally to the EU? I wanted to buy a chewable necklace from stimtastic, but they don't seem to ship to germany anymore... | aspergers |
I was diagnosed as bipolar 2 over 20 years ago, but it never seemed to fit very well. It was more recently diagnosed with ADHD, and so far it has fit the bill 1,000% better. I'm sure there's absolutely some overlap here, so I have a question for people who also have this comorbidity.
What is the stance your prescribing doctor takes on stimulant medication? Mine seems to be almost exclusionary, because she believes I'm more bipolar... Even though I've only experienced like one minor hypomanic episodes in my 20s, She's convinced it will set me off into a manic episode. How has your doctor handled this situation, and what have you discovered in the process? | ADHD |
This probably sounds way too dramatic, but this is genuinely how I feel. It fucking sucks when you meet the perfect person and they don't like you the same way. I hate being like this and I don't think it'll get better any time soon. | depression |
I always assumed I was real anxious and introverted deep down but I’ve realised that I do actually enjoy socialising for the most part (depends on the context of course)
The reason I rarely seem to go to events and things is because I hate having too many commitments and the planning required - I’ll usually forget to buy tickets, fail to arrange transport or check my calendar so it doesn’t clash with something etc it becomes too stressful - rather chill at home
Once I’m out I’ll probably be having a better time than I would at home ( altho do get drained by social interaction after a while).
This is something I want to challenge because there will come a time where I’m too old to be going to local gigs or beach parties, festivals even social sports.
I also thought I had no drive to explore the world but I realise I love travelling - I just hate the massive amounts of planning and preparation that’s involved ( even if you do it on a whim)
I just don’t know how some people work full time then pack their free time with camping trips and festivals etc.. a lack of executive dysfunction and a higher drive to socialise I guess
Who else relates? | ADHD |
I'm 90% sure I have ADHD and I'm working on getting a diagnosis but it's not an easy process here, so I have no access to meds right now.
I'm in uni, barely made it into my second year after stopping and starting multiple courses. graduated from school 8 years ago ffs. I am *painfully behind* in everything. Midterms are in just over a week. How does anyone manage to get up every morning on time, actually show up for lectures, do the reading and study notes afterwards. Let alone turning in assignments on time and paying attention in class?
I'm contemplating taking a year off while I try to get a diagnosis or some amount of help, but in the meantime does anyone have any advice? | ADHD |
Hi Michael! if your reading this you made my entire day especially when I brought of the fact of having aspergers and us relating on the same level because we both have this connection in a way. I literally just want everyone in this subreddit to know we are awesome but not because of our aspergers but because of how we are as people. Good night everyone and michael Ill catch you on the flip side. | aspergers |
I can’t find joy in my life. No movie, book, music or whatever entertain me. I just feel sad and empty all I do is clean and worry about cleaning. I can’t even finish my assignments for college. I am kind of desperate rn | OCD |
Does anyone else feel this way? I didn’t face my abuse for a long time, and tried to get therapy a few times in my life. Every time something has happened that made me regress and stop going, or because it just wasn’t the right therapy. Now I’m in EDMR, and I have been about a year. This is the most progress I’ve ever made. I’m on medication and starting to learn a lot about myself.
However it’s extremely difficult to actually do the trauma work. It’s like every week I’m just talking and trying to work something with my therapist because something big happened that is keeping me from doing trauma work. I’m in school, working, have no friends that live near me. Every week there’s something that triggers me and makes it very difficult to talk about my abuse.
Does anyone else feel this way? Like they are very sensitive to things that happen or like every time they start to try to get better something stops them?
It always feels so much easier to be in a numb state and reject what happened to me, but I want to be happy and overcome this. Does anyone have any advice or similar experiences? | ptsd |
Lol, like, I just realized after living without carpet for a few years that my entire life prior has been spent mostly on the floor on carpet. I loved making carpet angels in new apartments, exclusively played video games on the floor, watch tv on the floor, played board games on the floor. Like, pretty much avoided chairs if I could. I just LOVE carpet. Plush carpet. Just makes me feel so cozy. I’m actually really sad I don’t currently have carpet ;__;.
I’m still learning about myself in regards to spectrum stuff so I’m curious if this might be an ASD thing or if I’m just genuinely weird, lol. | aspergers |
this is happening to me over the past days and is something that never had happened before. | OCD |
So am heading to see a band tonight with some friends and as with most people, I would usually have a few beers. Nothing crazy, just a few beers socially.
However, I started Xaggitin XL 36mg over a month ago and it's working well and don't want to tarnish that. Been on plenty medication over the years which says not to drink alcohol but not really caused me problems. But the official guidance does definitely seem stronger against alcohol with ADHD stimulant medication.
Seen some people say it messes them up, others just say they don't get any positive effect. Looking for real-world experience from those who are on this medication and have tried alcohol with it.
Anyone? | ADHD |
Breakfast:
Whole wheat toast with peanut butter and banana
Five dates and five figs
Almond butter biscuit sandwhich
Chewy protein granola bar
Protein smoothie
In that order.
Lunch:
Chewy Protein Granola Bar
Almond butter biscuit sandwhich
Apple
Hummus wrap
In that order.
Every. Single. day. Lol | aspergers |
currently sitting on the toilet at taco bell (worked here at the beginning of the year but quit in march bc im lazy but its my first day back alongside my boyfriend today hehe) and literally the only thing im good for is using the cash register and cleaning bc the pos system is too hard to understand and people order stuff so fast and im genuinely slow in the brain and i forget what they order as soon as it leaves their mouth and i cant cook bc i cant remember the recipes lmao. anyone else the same? | ADHD |
After years of depression and counseling, I (44M) got diagnosed with ADHD a few months ago.
20 years ago I left my home country, because I could not live any longer anywhere where my parents lived. My mother had her own mental issues, as a teacher she was scared of psychiatrists diagnosing any issues in her parenting and had refused several times for me to be seen when referred by other teachers. Instead, she applied very intense emotional blackmail to force me to hide my symptoms.
My father (78) is a very aloof character, loving his freedoms. However, he always defended his own mother and my mother when any of his siblings or I as their only child criticized them. He had his fair share of childhood problems that he successfully hid from his parents and affairs that he covered up and my mother never knew about. He has successfully lived his life with strategies to distract from his own shortcomings.
One of the reasons it took so long for my diagnosis is that I as both made to conceal them as much as I could but also saw them as quite common with my dad as a benchmark. Since my own diagnosis, I realize that he very very likely also has ADHD. The patterns just fit, and it's obviously considered a disease with strong genetic causation. He also had a fairly difficult, childhood growing up in post-WWII Germany, to a fairly violent father and a very subdued mother himself.
My dad is still physically pretty fit, he has lots of charisma. Yet, he really struggles with everyday life, constantly makes ad-hoc decisions, takes unnecessary risks, cannot let go of anything. Most of this is not new behavior at all. However, at his age, the outcomes have started to be a lot more severe.
When bad events happen my dad makes up lies to anyone, just to gain sympathy and support, but also to lie to himself and convince himself that everything is okay, when really it is not. In the process he ends up just making everything worse. This has lead to accidents, falls. I am scared to get into a car with him, yet he still drives 10s of thousands of kilometers. From a rental car, I recently witnessed his driving on a motorway. He tailgated me at less than 10m at a speed of over 160km/h, then after I turned into an outer lane, he approached the next car in front of him so it looked like an emergency brake and used his horn to make them change lane even though they were still overtaking another car.
The issue is many of these events are entirely preventable, with some advance planning. He drives fast because he leaves too late, he misses appointments with dog trainers so they refuse to help him with his barely controllable dog. Some people notice this, others gladly take his money to help him and others really break under the stress he puts them through. I had several calls with his new girlfriend who has fallen for his charms but is after just 6 months breaking under the constant manipulation.
I'd like him to consider an ADHD diagnosis, but at his age this will likely not be possible unless he is collaborating. I'm really looking for some advice from others who have been in a similar situation. I've mentioned it to him and he outright refuses to accept any possibility. | ADHD |
Im 23 and have never been a social person, actually have struggled with social anxiety my whole life and still do. Basically I never spoke in class or school except to friends, so I never really had the experience to like firsthand learn how to process thoughts to then put into words.
If I were to describe something (whether it’s an experience, a fact about something random, or really anything that needs to be descriptive), I struggle tremendously.
For example, if I was to try to verbally explain how to replant a crop, I would just say the main points, leaving out all descriptive words and side comments, because my brain is mainly focused on those main points, and forget to say the other points that are indeed helpful for ‘painting the picture’.
My verbal example: (I actually said it outloud so I could accurately replicate how I’d say it in-person)
“So to replant a crop, you just dig it up, bring it over to the new area, dig a small hole and place it in it and cover it up.”
How I wish I could say it:
“When replanting crops, you always want to know how deep their roots are, because you don’t want to accidentally dig into them and break them off the plant—we want to keep these plants alive. So firstly, you’ll take a shovel, dig a few inches away from the base stem, and pull up. Hold the plant by the stem and shake or lightly break up the compact dirt—you don’t want all of those grass seeds to grow in the new transplanted area they will be put in. Remove most of the dirt if you can, and quickly put it in a shallow bucket of water, to keep the roots hydrated so they don’t dry up. Then bring the bucket to the area you’re transplanting it in, and put it next to you. Then, with your hand, put it in the soil, so all of your fingers are underground, and twist, making a hole in the ground. This is where you will put in the plant. Take the plant out of the bucket, give it a light shake (for the water), and place it in the hole, making sure all root are underground. Then fill the rest of the hole with surrounding soil and lightly pack it in.”
So basically I guess I lack description when I verbalize my thoughts, because maybe my social anxiety rushes me into thinking I just need to get to the point because im wasting someone else’s time by describing something simple. And/or, that my inability to put my attention where I want it to be, makes it difficult to not focus on the main points, so I just resort to saying the main points, lacking description.
Does anyone feel like this? I can’t tell if it’s an ADHD thing or more of a social anxiety/my lack of ‘practice’ verbalizing my thoughts. | ADHD |
Sometimes I feel pitied, sometimes I feel like people's inspiration porn. I always wish I could shed what feels like a cheap suit that's too small. | ptsd |
When I’m upset or if I’m gonna cry when I’m crying it’s like I can feel myself laughing or a smile coming on so then I don’t cry is that weird I just want it to go 😂 | OCD |
I hate not knowing that I can’t know if I 100% have OCD. I’ve been diagnosed many many times and thinking back on it I see how it has affected my every decision in a way. But I still can’t be positive and it’s eating me alive. It’s all I think about. All day, every day from the time I wake up to the time I close my eyes. | OCD |
I had to watch these videos for school. I didn’t quite understand it but then it made a weird comparison with Adhd that didn’t make sense. [watch this video first](https://youtu.be/VgYmIsYmUIU). Now that you have watched that video, please watch [this video](https://youtu.be/jHjkEfwfECo) for more of the definition for the one on top of the pyramid. Both videos are made by the same account. Please leave your thoughts. | ADHD |
I've recently began working in the field of ABA as a behavior tech/interventionist for Centria Autism. I was diagnosed with Asperger's at a very young age and so the idea was that I could relate to my clients maybe a bit better than someone without autism.
I was curious if anyone else has taken a similar route and what your experience was like? I find my job to be rewarding but also stressful because I'm teaching skills that took me longer to learn. I'm also curious about your opinions on ABA if any of you have experience with it.
-Thankyou | aspergers |
I'm so exhausted. There are so many problems to solve all the time. Personal. In my environment. With my health. Finances. Work. Dealing with people. Dealing with lack of sleep. Dealing with breathing problems. Dealing with the weirdness of sex drive. Figuring out what I can eat without spending all day and night with intestinal cramps. Controlling my frustration levels. Just existing.
I feel like I'm really not made for this world. I guess the problem is that on one hand I'm high functioning enough to pretend I can do it all. I sort of manage, after finding enough accomodations for my needs (working from home, ignoring social life). I guess I always thought over time I'd get better at it all, a d eventually start feeling more fulfilled rather than just stressed and like I'm working through an endless checklist.
But maybe the truth is that I'm more disabled than I want to admit.
I think I just want my life to be radically more simple. I just want to watch cartoons and be left alone. Or sit somewhere and stare at the ocean. Leave me alone with your pseudo-urgent work problems.
Of course I still want to do meaningful things. Of course I need money. So it can't ever be simple. So I'm stuck. Stuck with this shit pile of problems that never really gets smaller. | aspergers |
So today i who am 16 woke up and in my head thought of a 13 or 12 year old in my head and my body reacted with arousal. And at first I was like it's an intrusive thought. But then a few moments later the thought came up and I didnt have a boner but my body still felt aroused and it gave me an urge to masturbate to it. But I didnt. I didnt panick like I usually do because I've been having pocd for 8 months and it doesent get better so I'm used to it. But this felt too real too not be real. So I think I might just be in denial. I had just woken up so maybe it was cos of that but idk anymore and idk what to do tbh. I wanted to die but then I promised someone I wouldnt. See its never kids with my ocd more like younger teenagers that i worry about | OCD |
Hey guys i got Pure O recently also diagnosed.
I dont get anxious over my thoughts, they are just annoying me and making me depressed or angry..
Which are good medications? | OCD |
This has happened so many times.
You know when you’re in a group of “friends”? And they’re all having fun but you’re kind of just on the sidelines? You can tell that they don’t want you there but they’re not gonna tell you that. You can kind of just tell that your presence isn’t wanted. Sometimes they say “can you leave for a second?” Or “you don’t HAVE to come with us”. It hurts so much because I can tell that my “friendships” are fading apart and that I’ll be back to square one again. The best way I can think to describe this is the scene from Skins when Effy and Julie go out and Effys having fun with people and Julies kind of just left there like “I thought we were here together!”
None of this makes sense I know. But I’m just wondering… does anyone else get this? | depression |
I don’t necessarily want to feel like garbage anymore
But every time I try not to I’m left feeling like crap anyways
I’m just destined to feel like shit
I don’t want to be here anymore | depression |
That's... pretty much it, I just hate Valentine's day with a passion... gives me terrible flashbacks... | ptsd |
I'm in the middle of a police investigation against my abuser and the DA wants more than I can give. People who said they would interview to help me have backed out just because it's inconvenient for them to coordinate. I feel betrayed and heartbroken by the few people I trusted with the knowledge of my abuse.
I feel worse than I did when the abuse was actually taking place. I'm so anxious, sad, and angry all of the time. I feel isolated because I have very few friends, less that I trust, and little to no family (who has also betrayed me) support. I haven't seen my family in 7 months because my abuser still lives there.
I feel like everyone is letting me down. How can I go on to try to make friends and connections after this? I want to, but I feel so utterly devastated and sick every day.
Does anyone know how to address this loneliness? How to make the jump and try to connect with people? | ptsd |
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