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96,200
The biker bitches are likewise hardly any queen’s idea of fabulous.
The biker bitches are likewise hardly
any queen’s idea of fabulous.
96,201
(As an eighth grader I was as sex-crazed as any of my peers, but the first time a girl stuck her tongue in my mouth, I practically fainted with disgust.
(As an eighth grader I was as sex-crazed as any of my peers, but
the first time a girl stuck her tongue in my mouth, I practically fainted with disgust.
96,202
Ceilings are being brought down, the site pharmacy is a sucking hole at the side of the building.
Ceilings are being brought down, the site pharmacy is
a sucking hole at the side of the building.
96,203
The smugness in his voice could not be mistaken; this pointy bastard was sleeping with my wife.
The smugness in his voice could not be mistaken
; this pointy bastard was sleeping with my wife.
96,204
Ya know, back in 1688 I was telling some fellas down at the local inn as I was passing through that someone “oughta take a whip and beat ol Dracula right in the fucking mouth with it” and then we all had a toast and a good laugh.
Ya know, back in 1688 I was telling some fellas down at the local inn as I was passing through that someone “oughta take
a whip and beat ol Dracula right in the fucking mouth with it” and then we all had a toast and a good laugh.
96,205
Pamela Lopez accused Assemblyman Matt Dababneh, D-Encino (Los Angeles County), of pushing his way into a bathroom with her last year and trying to get her to touch his exposed genitals.
Pamela Lopez accused Assemblyman Matt Dababneh, D-Encino (Los Angeles County), of pushing his
way into a bathroom with her last year and trying to get her to touch his exposed genitals.
96,206
I’m not sure what would cause Graham to even muse about her racial bona fides, let alone share his idiocy publicly.
I’m not sure what would cause Graham to even muse about
her racial bona fides, let alone share his idiocy publicly.
96,207
But I acted horribly, and unprofessionally, and that was shitty of me.
But I acted horribly, and unprofessionally
, and that was shitty of me.
96,208
Oh, Ireland, the land of my forefathers, interoffice harassment, and women who die after having sex with dogs.
Oh, Ireland, the land of my forefathers, interoffice
harassment, and women who die after having sex with dogs.
96,209
Every time I see it I want to barf on the sharers mothers tits and then scatter feathers on that barf.
Every time I see it I want to barf on the
sharers mothers tits and then scatter feathers on that barf.
96,210
Why is it OK for my despicable piece of shit father to get drunk and slap my butt telling me I should loose some of that “blubber” to get a job since I couldn’t do so well in college (I DIDN’T CHOOSE TO HAVE ADHD YOU ASSHOLE!!!)
Why is it OK for my despicable piece of shit father to get drunk and slap my butt telling me I should loose some of that “
blubber” to get a job since I couldn’t do so well in college (I DIDN’T CHOOSE TO HAVE ADHD YOU ASSHOLE!!!)
96,211
He offered me a resigned look, sucking through his nicotine-stained teeth.
He offered me a resigned look,
sucking through his nicotine-stained teeth.
96,212
“Ricksy Business” demonstrates an awareness that you don’t want to go out on a down note so it’s pretty much a gleeful hodgepodge of funny-ass, sci-fi bullshit.
“Ricksy Business” demonstrates an awareness that you don’t want to go out on a down
note so it’s pretty much a gleeful hodgepodge of funny-ass, sci-fi bullshit.
96,213
In one video clip, LaBeouf can be seen calling the bartender a “racist bitch” and telling him, “You f—ed up.”
In one video clip, LaBeouf can be seen calling the bartender a “
racist bitch” and telling him, “You f—ed up.”
96,214
Trump is determined to keep the country focused on whether he is, in fact, a "moron."
Trump is determined to keep the country focused on whether
he is, in fact, a "moron."
96,215
As one customer surveyed explained, “It’s a pint, just a bloody pint – you’re not choosing the wine for your sodding wedding, you ale gargling c*nt.”
As one customer surveyed explained, “It’s a pint, just a bloody pint –
you’re not choosing the wine for your sodding wedding, you ale gargling c*nt.”
96,216
“I pray that you will commit suicide, you filthy child molesting f*g.”
“I pray that you will commit suicide
, you filthy child molesting f*g.”
96,217
As long as these devices are plugged into a socket, they suck the teat of Mother Electricity, little by little, 24 hours a day.
As long as these devices are plugged into a socket, they suck the
teat of Mother Electricity, little by little, 24 hours a day.
96,218
Harry Potter and the Cursed Child is one play presented in two parts.
Harry Potter and the Cursed Child is
one play presented in two parts.
96,219
Security mobilized in a hot minute and beat the shit out of him.
Security mobilized in a hot minute and
beat the shit out of him.
96,220
“You are not welcome here… You lower the value and safety of our good town… You bring death wherever your cursed people go.”
“You are not welcome here… You lower the value and safety of
our good town… You bring death wherever your cursed people go.”
96,221
Documents say she said she heard what sounded like him masturbating.
Documents say she said she heard
what sounded like him masturbating.
96,222
Then there’s the bad days…like when it rains and you all smell like wet asshole all day long…or when it’s 8 a.m. and my not-so-morning self gets bombarded with cheery “Good Mornings!”
Then there’s the bad days…like when it rains and you all smell like wet asshole all day long…
or when it’s 8 a.m. and my not-so-morning self gets bombarded with cheery “Good Mornings!”
96,223
Danny Brown's XXX was a concept album about desperation; "If this shit don't work, nigga, I failed at life!"
Danny Brown's XXX was a concept album about desperation; "If
this shit don't work, nigga, I failed at life!"
96,224
Even worse, they are making him the butt of jokes, such as the official who called Ashan "the Taliban equivalent of the 'Home Alone' burglars,” while another simply told the Washington Post, "Clearly, this man is an imbecile."
Even worse, they are making him the butt of jokes, such as the official who called Ashan "the Taliban equivalent of the
'Home Alone' burglars,” while another simply told the Washington Post, "Clearly, this man is an imbecile."
96,225
but the fact is, this girl is a living, breathing, satire of feminism. it’s delusional self rationalizing horse shit.
but the fact is, this girl is a living, breathing
, satire of feminism. it’s delusional self rationalizing horse shit.
96,226
"It can be tough to work with your ex," Kermit lamented, "especially if your ex is a pig."
"It can be tough to work with your ex,"
Kermit lamented, "especially if your ex is a pig."
96,227
Missed a call from a super-slut today that I’ve known for a while.
Missed a call from a super-slut
today that I’ve known for a while.
96,228
Other Tweets remain where Maulbeck describes Steam as an "incompetent piece of fucking shit" and a "monopoly", among other things.
Other Tweets remain where Maulbeck describes Steam as an "incompetent piece of
fucking shit" and a "monopoly", among other things.
96,229
Lady Chatterley's Lover was once a no-go because it's saucy AF, while more recently The Human Centipede was banned because it's fucking rank.
Lady Chatterley's Lover was once a no-go because it's saucy AF
, while more recently The Human Centipede was banned because it's fucking rank.
96,230
Yet a lying, thieving, philandering sadist defeated the most qualified of candidates.
Yet a lying, thieving, philandering
sadist defeated the most qualified of candidates.
96,231
Big cities, social media, and dating websites help fuel the endless army of lower alphas and betas who will kill their entire family just to sniff her pussy.
Big cities, social media, and dating websites help fuel the endless army of
lower alphas and betas who will kill their entire family just to sniff her pussy.
96,232
Gordon added that he and his siblings were taking their mom’s suggestion that they could leave on Christmas Day if the ticket was cheaper for the utter horseshit that it is.
Gordon added that he and his siblings were taking their mom’s suggestion that they could
leave on Christmas Day if the ticket was cheaper for the utter horseshit that it is.
96,233
A New York pastor has warned that Starbucks coffees are flavoured with the “semen of sodomites”.
A New York pastor has warned that Starbucks coffees
are flavoured with the “semen of sodomites”.
96,234
A woman in Vietnam is generating controversy after stuffing chili peppers into the vagina of her husband's mistress.
A woman in Vietnam is generating controversy after stuffing chili
peppers into the vagina of her husband's mistress.
96,235
And that you have to be a virgin, preferably having no sexual activity before marriage, no masturbation and definitely no homosexuality.
And that you have to be a virgin, preferably having no
sexual activity before marriage, no masturbation and definitely no homosexuality.
96,236
"Fuck the Leicestershire police for scanning your faces without you knowing," said Bellamy, introducing the revolt anthem 'Uprising'.
"Fuck the Leicestershire police for scanning your faces without you knowing
," said Bellamy, introducing the revolt anthem 'Uprising'.
96,237
The thing is, you have to be a little more specific, since the complete and utter idiot demographic is surprisingly large compared to the ridiculously dismal amount of spam that is actually responded to.
The thing is, you have to be a little more specific, since the complete and utter
idiot demographic is surprisingly large compared to the ridiculously dismal amount of spam that is actually responded to.
96,238
Vocal passengers used 1st Amendment right to be huge bitches,complained so much bus was "too bumpy" that we are turning around
Vocal passengers used 1st Amendment right to be huge bitches,complained
so much bus was "too bumpy" that we are turning around
96,239
UPDATE (9/21/15): David Cameron dismissed the claims about his pig-fucking days as a university student (as well as the bit in the book about him being in a marijuana "smoking club").
UPDATE (9/21/15): David Cameron dismissed the claims about his pig-fucking days as a university student
(as well as the bit in the book about him being in a marijuana "smoking club").
96,240
If you look over the history of my column you'll see me complaining about DRM, bad gameplay mechanics, Digital Rights Management, idiot publishers, copy protection, bad storytelling, anti-piracy software, graphics obsession, and online activation.
If you look over the history of my column you'll see me complaining about DRM, bad gameplay mechanics, Digital Rights
Management, idiot publishers, copy protection, bad storytelling, anti-piracy software, graphics obsession, and online activation.
96,241
But comedy has a serious gender problem, and I really can't stop complaining about it until it's fucking fixed.
But comedy has a serious gender problem, and I really
can't stop complaining about it until it's fucking fixed.
96,242
“You know very well, and the stupid Americans know equally well, that we control their government, irrespective of who sits in the White House.
“You know very well, and the stupid Americans know equally well,
that we control their government, irrespective of who sits in the White House.
96,243
Jürgen Klinsmann has gotten shit over the years for failing to cheerlead for MLS.
Jürgen Klinsmann has gotten shit over the
years for failing to cheerlead for MLS.
96,244
A group of blind men are asked, presumably by a complete asshole with too much time on his hands, to describe an elephant.
A group of blind men are asked, presumably by a complete asshole
with too much time on his hands, to describe an elephant.
96,245
The spokesman added: “We will try to keep the horrible, cheap shit as cheap and horrible as possible.”
The spokesman added: “We will try to keep the
horrible, cheap shit as cheap and horrible as possible.”
96,246
"I don't think it was necessary for you to react the way you did just because I asked you to go somewhere private, telling me to f*** off and squirting me with your boobs was incredibly uncalled for.
"I don't think it was necessary for you to react the way you did just because I asked you to
go somewhere private, telling me to f*** off and squirting me with your boobs was incredibly uncalled for.
96,247
“James Murphy is a selfish piece of fuck that will burn in the flames of a specially dedicated rock and roll jihad. if I had the resources I would fly a plane into his skull,” the band said in a blistering statement issued at the time.
“James Murphy is a selfish piece of fuck that will burn in the flames of a specially dedicated rock and roll jihad. if
I had the resources I would fly a plane into his skull,” the band said in a blistering statement issued at the time.
96,248
It shows that he cares about more than just a pay cheque, that he actually gives a crap.
It shows that he cares about more than just a
pay cheque, that he actually gives a crap.
96,249
“I will slaughter them and burn their Synagogue to the ground . . . kids, goldfish, old folks.
“I will slaughter them and burn their Synagogue to the
ground . . . kids, goldfish, old folks.
96,250
Brock Lesnar and Roman Reigns, it turned out, told an amazing story: Brock the unstoppable monster, just mauling the shit out of Reigns at will.
Brock Lesnar and Roman Reigns, it turned out, told an amazing story:
Brock the unstoppable monster, just mauling the shit out of Reigns at will.
96,251
It gets you black men like radio host Charlamagne and The Daily Show's Trevor Noah caping for you and trying to get you to change your mind about racism.
It gets you black men like radio host Charlamagne and The Daily Show's Trevor
Noah caping for you and trying to get you to change your mind about racism.
96,252
In fact both masturbation and partnered sex are very good for your general health, provided you practise safe sex in the latter case of course.
In fact both masturbation and partnered sex are very good for your general
health, provided you practise safe sex in the latter case of course.
96,253
I mean, not only is he posing as an evil lizard alien who loves Obamacare, nothing he says in this video makes any fucking sense.
I mean, not only is he posing as an evil lizard alien who
loves Obamacare, nothing he says in this video makes any fucking sense.
96,254
Our presidential election choices have many considering to forgo voting altogether and just “stay my ass at home.”
Our presidential election choices have many considering to forgo voting
altogether and just “stay my ass at home.”
96,255
With this latest cock up Griffenführer may well have another court case on his hands.
With this latest cock up Griffenführer may well
have another court case on his hands.
96,256
While Panik is expected to return soon, backs are finicky jerks.
While Panik is expected to return
soon, backs are finicky jerks.
96,257
As long as we're still looking to teens to decide what's cool, we asked a bunch of them whether they give a shit about legalization.
As long as we're still looking to teens to decide what's cool
, we asked a bunch of them whether they give a shit about legalization.
96,258
Performing at the Hollywood Forever Cemetery, Flying Lotus closed his set with a Gaslamp Killer track, before telling the audience: “The internet is a fuckin’ liar.
Performing at the Hollywood Forever Cemetery, Flying Lotus closed his set with a Gaslamp Killer
track, before telling the audience: “The internet is a fuckin’ liar.
96,259
for using the F-bomb, after he said he was 'not going to pay for that f***ing wall!'
for using the F-bomb, after he said he
was 'not going to pay for that f***ing wall!'
96,260
Bruni, 21, allegedly assaulted Tony Land, trashed the couple's North Fort Myers, Fla., home and then defecated and masturbated INSIDE the house.
Bruni, 21, allegedly assaulted Tony Land, trashed the couple's North
Fort Myers, Fla., home and then defecated and masturbated INSIDE the house.
96,261
“[Gender studies professors] are pumping out complete bullshit and indoctrinating a generation of students to believe total nonsense.” — Peter Boghossian.
“[Gender studies professors] are pumping out complete bullshit and indoctrinating
a generation of students to believe total nonsense.” — Peter Boghossian.
96,262
The piece was written by a guy named Alex Williams, who wrote an article the next day titled which features a diagram of "the aging skate rebel today" holding a Bustin longboard and a fucking VitaCoco.
The piece was written by a guy named Alex Williams, who wrote an article the next day titled which
features a diagram of "the aging skate rebel today" holding a Bustin longboard and a fucking VitaCoco.
96,263
"We are here to demand transparency when it comes to corruption, and this outfit justifies transparency," she said, pointing at the two flimsy tassles that covered her nipples.
"We are here to demand transparency when it comes to corruption, and this outfit justifies
transparency," she said, pointing at the two flimsy tassles that covered her nipples.
96,264
While he was lying in the hospital recovering from having his dick sewn back on, his wife crept into his room, chopped his peen off again, and threw it out the window.
While he was lying in the hospital recovering from having his dick sewn back on, his wife
crept into his room, chopped his peen off again, and threw it out the window.
96,265
“My pants had been ripped off and I was bleeding from the cuts on the outer parts of my genitals.
“My pants had been ripped off and I was bleeding
from the cuts on the outer parts of my genitals.
96,266
“His insecurities are the reason I make better music than him…I’m more popping than him…At one point the woman he loves fell into my lap and I did what a real nigga would do and treated her with respect.”
“His insecurities are the reason I make better music than him…I’m more popping than him…At one point the
woman he loves fell into my lap and I did what a real nigga would do and treated her with respect.”
96,267
The woman that fell to Earth was actually a blow-up sex doll and she landed in a small village in Indonesia.
The woman that fell to Earth was actually a blow-up
sex doll and she landed in a small village in Indonesia.
96,268
In pictures, the heckler could be seen with a sign that read “Bill Clinton is a rapist” as well as the website infowars.com written underneath the message.
In pictures, the heckler could be seen with a sign that read “Bill
Clinton is a rapist” as well as the website infowars.com written underneath the message.
96,269
float my boat all the way around the turbulent waters of this fucking world.
float my boat all the way around
the turbulent waters of this fucking world.
96,270
STUPID people are not transformed into geniuses by eating oily food, it has emerged.
STUPID people are not transformed into geniuses by
eating oily food, it has emerged.
96,271
President Obama is going to be visiting Joplin, Missouri, on Sunday, but you know what they're talking about, like this right-wing slut, what's her name?
President Obama is going to be visiting Joplin, Missouri, on Sunday, but you know
what they're talking about, like this right-wing slut, what's her name?
96,272
I said, ya need a leader that looks regal, done stuff illegal, drives faster than a hunting beagle, so vote for me, not this bitch Eagle.”
I said, ya need a leader that looks regal, done stuff illegal, drives
faster than a hunting beagle, so vote for me, not this bitch Eagle.”
96,273
She jokingly promised fans that she would give blowjobs to anyone who voted for Hillary Clinton.
She jokingly promised fans that she would give
blowjobs to anyone who voted for Hillary Clinton.
96,274
If I had submitted this script to my former creative director, he would have wiped his ass with it and thrown it back in my face.
If I had submitted this script to my former creative director, he would
have wiped his ass with it and thrown it back in my face.
96,275
When will your trans brothers and sisters see ministers and politicians decry the loss of these lives as loudly as you do for cisgender Black people?”
When will your trans brothers and sisters see ministers and politicians decry the loss
of these lives as loudly as you do for cisgender Black people?”
96,276
Yea, a shocking number of products just say things like "environmentally friendly" or "certified by (whatever crap organization)," and it's just made-up crap!
Yea, a shocking number of products just say things like "environmentally friendly" or "
certified by (whatever crap organization)," and it's just made-up crap!
96,277
“Maybe you should comment, stop being such a cowardly ignorant little dipshit?
“Maybe you should comment, stop
being such a cowardly ignorant little dipshit?
96,278
Background: If the 16th century was the renaissance of shitty popes, the 10th century was the true dark age of the papacy.
Background: If the 16th century was the renaissance of shitty popes
, the 10th century was the true dark age of the papacy.
96,279
Orgasm in both men and women is a heck of a lot more than just a few genital contractions.
Orgasm in both men and women is a heck of
a lot more than just a few genital contractions.
96,280
and just made it out of the group stage in really great fashion, beating aLive 2-0 (suck it, Darkhorse!)
and just made it out of the group stage in really great fashion
, beating aLive 2-0 (suck it, Darkhorse!)
96,281
This is sound advice when dealing with rural law enforcement having been given, essentially, carte blanche to mess with your hard-partying ass.
This is sound advice when dealing with rural law enforcement having been given
, essentially, carte blanche to mess with your hard-partying ass.
96,282
Stupid gender stereotyping and questionable coding practices 101
Stupid gender stereotyping and
questionable coding practices 101
96,283
A fake Republican and a fake Democratic are not just threatening "real" partisans but absolutely kicking ass!
A fake Republican and a fake Democratic are not just
threatening "real" partisans but absolutely kicking ass!
96,284
“Let them f***ing die” was the response of Johnny Eric Williams, a professor at Trinity College, to the Congressional baseball shooting earlier this month.
“Let them f***ing die” was the response of Johnny Eric Williams,
a professor at Trinity College, to the Congressional baseball shooting earlier this month.
96,285
That a savant may be an idiot, surrounded by a sea of disability, I don't think, requires us to overestimate what is involved in the little they can do.
That a savant may be an idiot, surrounded by a sea of disability, I do
n't think, requires us to overestimate what is involved in the little they can do.
96,286
So if these bastards in DC decide to ruin the internet, here’s how to access your favorite sites in the event of a DNS takedown
So if these bastards in DC decide to ruin the internet, here
’s how to access your favorite sites in the event of a DNS takedown
96,287
The social justice warriors who pander to Islam deserve to be mocked and ridiculed, he went on to say.
The social justice warriors who pander to Islam deserve to
be mocked and ridiculed, he went on to say.
96,288
Moi Non Plus' to a fear of breasts, Jeremy Allen sits down with Gitane and citron pressé to look at the music and thirsty life of Serge Gainsbourg.
Moi Non Plus' to a fear of breasts, Jeremy Allen sits down with
Gitane and citron pressé to look at the music and thirsty life of Serge Gainsbourg.
96,289
But I cannot afford to let myself file him under “one of those assholes,” not yet.
But I cannot afford to let myself file him
under “one of those assholes,” not yet.
96,290
We started off with a montage that basically reminded us how totally shitty her choices are.
We started off with a montage that basically
reminded us how totally shitty her choices are.
96,291
“Jack (Warner) is a measure of reality for those who like bullshit.”
“Jack (Warner) is a measure
of reality for those who like bullshit.”
96,292
During a presentation on the importance of consent in sexual relationships, they were told that they should "rub one out" (masturbate) rather than force themselves on another person.
During a presentation on the importance of consent in sexual relationships, they were told that they
should "rub one out" (masturbate) rather than force themselves on another person.
96,293
When you hear stuff like that you think, ugh, it just sucks that otherwise ethical people accept that as truth.
When you hear stuff like that you think, ugh,
it just sucks that otherwise ethical people accept that as truth.
96,294
You are William Redmoor and your life is about to become a living hell.
You are William Redmoor and your life
is about to become a living hell.
96,295
According to police, Hunter Osborn, 19, said he was dared by a teammate to expose his penis when the team photo was taken in the school bleachers.
According to police, Hunter Osborn, 19, said he was dared by a
teammate to expose his penis when the team photo was taken in the school bleachers.
96,296
Millar’s scripts have brought us fine moments like an incestual baby bomb, gang rape with plenty of wisecracks, and ending a comic by giving the reader a middle finger while anally raping them.
Millar’s scripts have brought us fine moments like an incestual baby bomb, gang rape with plenty
of wisecracks, and ending a comic by giving the reader a middle finger while anally raping them.
96,297
Last time I remember, civilians penises aren't horse size dicks at all, civilians are on average roughly 4-6 inches.
Last time I remember, civilians penises aren't horse size dicks
at all, civilians are on average roughly 4-6 inches.
96,298
Below, I’ve compiled a list of ten of the most interesting facts about the vagina because, well, knowledge is power…and also pleasure.
Below, I’ve compiled a list of ten of the most interesting facts
about the vagina because, well, knowledge is power…and also pleasure.
96,299
He continued, “Now we ARE the government, so fuck you… try to stop us!
He continued, “Now we ARE the government
, so fuck you… try to stop us!