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No matter what I have or what I do, I end up in a pool of defeat & sadness. I didn’t have a job and I was depressed.
I got a job and after 5 months I’m now sliding back into depression.
While jobless I exercised to not feel depressed but it didn’t really work. Now I have a job and I can’t exercise because it’s a ... | self.depression |
Why did I google that? I just spent the last drunken hour searching bipolar brains and now am totally freaked that my brain will always be fucked. I’m currently a college student and the thought that my bipolar could possibly be causing grey matter loss is fucking with me.
Guess I’ll just drink more scotch. | self.bipolar |
First day of CBT and want to give up already I just can't be bothered with it.... The homework will be too much effort for me to do even though it's just writing some things down. I don't think I want to get better. Looks like I'm going to be a failure for the rest of my life and waste my life away at home.. | self.depression |
How to cope with night loneliness So before sleep i usually feel alone and just generally like shit so i cuddle with a pillow and it normally works, but it has stopped working and now i can't sleep. What can i do? | self.depression |
I want to die and I've driven off anyone who would I could actually talk about it with. I'm not okay, I'm never going to be okay, and I just dig up random people from my past to dump shit on and then eventually they get tired of it and stop talking to me because why would anyone want to deal with someone who's whole id... | self.SuicideWatch |
I feel stuck, I need advice. Hey guys, I'm a 20 male who has been going through dark times since beginning of this year. I've been depressed to the point where I developed chronic migraines and prostatitis. I bite the pillow every day (literally, not making a sexual reference) to get through the mental pain. I try to g... | self.depression |
My post-attempt Anhedonia has made me a living corpse Hi, everyone.
First post here with this account, but long time lurker.
Being my first post, it will be quite long and introduttive, so if you don’t feel like reading it I’m completely fine with it.
It all started with my first suicide attempt:
Being a creative per... | self.depression |
I'm scared. Ive had a lot of suicidal thoughts but they were not very strong as it is now but my issue is that I'm impulsive. I'm scared one day I'm going to end my life on impulse. Also I have cut before and I think I've become numbed to the pain. Ive had instances where I think to myself what if I drink this liquor ... | self.depression |
The previous two weeks I had some of the worst anxiety of my life. This weekend I started a new job and everything went smooth and it was pretty easy! Things can turn around quickly! [deleted] | self.Anxiety |
Fuck Here I am, updating my diary again.
Just as I thought my life had made a turn in the right direction, it proved me wrong.
Where should I start?
Most of the week was quite OK, with the exception of Wednesday, when I got way too drunk and cried my soul out with a colleague from my studies, and yesterday.
Yesterday, ... | self.depression |
I'm in love with someone and I feel let down I'm in love with someone. I think about them constantly. They say they like me and they enjoy spending time with me and we flirt almost constantly. But whenever it comes down to real emotional break down its always "I really like you a lot". Nothing more than that. I'm r... | self.offmychest |
Advice: The Dead Sea, saltiest place on Earth, second to her. New Relationship, and best described as dating a pretzel... Twisted, salty and I can't get enough! I'm a 22 y/o Maori male and have been seeing this choice as lady for a coupley months, she's 30 and deals with type 1. We just started living together, and she... | self.bipolar |
Visualizing my depression... I get this mental image of me, walking thought a Southwestern American desert. Things seem OK: bright day, sunshine, flat land for miles...
...and the someone kicks my feet out from under me. I fall, and my head usually hits the ground. I am scratched and bloody from hitting the hard-packe... | self.depression |
I Should Be Dead Here's my story, I've been suffering with depression for most of my life at this stage, my dad left at a very young age, I've had pretty much no male influence in my life. I've spent pretty much my whole life with my mom and sisters, they haven't always treated me very well and I think that's one of th... | self.SuicideWatch |
I can't remember the last time I saw the sunlight [deleted] | self.depression |
I came home tonight to an empty apartment---wife is gone with all her things I'm 34. Great job and well educated but I wouldn't exactly call myself overly physically attractive. Wife and I have had issues over 5 years of marriage, some mine some hers. I'm fairly certain no one has ever cheated, but we have had dishon... | self.SuicideWatch |
what are the signs that you‘re depressed? i really feel like shit everyday for no reason at all, and i‘m always thinking that it‘s not depression. more that i‘m just doing something wrong | self.depression |
I feel there won't be any other choice (no place to live) Too much personal info. | self.SuicideWatch |
At a low point, dont know what to do anymore I have no friends, everyone I know hates me, my job hates me, my whole family thinks im a nothing but a dissapointment.
Ive been dealing with manic depreesion for years and can never seem to get better, and everyone has just given up on me.
I feel like everyone hates me a... | self.SuicideWatch |
Anyone else get the fucking religion talk? I broke down crying today and my mom noticed and the first thing she does is tell me I should "surrender to god" and I get increasingly pissed off until I tell her "please stop or I'm gonna break my fist on the wall" and she keeps fucking going so now my fist is all bloody and... | self.depression |
Today is the kind of day where all I can do is sit in bed and hug my teddy bear but I have to go be a functioning adult [removed] | self.depression |
You Guys are the best, thank you Hello Everyone, I just wanted to say that I really appreciate this sub and everyone on it for the amazing support it offers and reassurance it provides in its posts both funny and serious.
I had my millionth quarter life crisis last November and came here with a long and incoherent po... | self.bipolar |
Ignorance is Bliss This statement never made sense to me. Until recently.
There are so many wise and intelligent people here. I am pretty well-educated and I consider myself pretty intelligent. I’m a researcher by nature and training.
And omg would my life be a lot easier if I wasn’t.
Does this make sense? | self.bipolar |
I've been feeling particularly down lately I'm going to be 25 in a few months. It's a round number, as close to 30 as it is to 20, and I think it's putting a particularly bright light on my myriad insecurities.
I'm currently living with my parents and working as a cashier. The constant small talk and interaction with... | self.depression |
I feel like a loser I'm not very good at life in general but today i went to print out something for school. The woman working there tends to make small talk with people which already makes me uneasy.
Today she gave me the staple gun to staple the papers on my own because she was busy. I got nervous and couldn't (i tr... | self.Anxiety |
I'm so busted, that Reddit is my only support structure Life is a kick, I have a wife and 4 kids, a grandkid and I haven't had a friend in more than a decade. A few years ago I suffered some trauma that spun me into years of the worst Anxiety issues you can imagine, I managed to hold it together enough to be a father,... | self.offmychest |
I can't be on my own because I worry myself sick Whether its parties or just being out on my own, I will not eat food because I am too afraid of feeling sick after eating. This will cause me to feel sick from thinking about it to the point where I will be gagging and vomiting from nothing. (Sorry for crap explanation, ... | self.Anxiety |
Do you ever feel like something is wrong? Like you are in your house, nothing is bad, everything is Ok, you don't have nothing to worry about but still you feel uneasy, like something is wrong? I love those moments where I do feel good, relaxed. But almost always it's like I'm hiding from someone and they are gonna com... | self.Anxiety |
Just been prescribed fluoxetine (prozac) I'm happy I have a solution of some kind to my anxiety but now I'm worrying about what the side effects will be like. Some of them are the same as my anxiety symptoms - nausea, trouble sleeping. Have any of you been prescribed this specifically for anxiety? | self.Anxiety |
Medications that work instantly I’ve been on medications for a while and feel no different is there an antidepressant that works rapidly fast | self.depression |
I don't think anyone likes me people offline say I'm nice and I behave good so I don't get why I ;-; I'm not as popular online
this guy that made people hate me for 15 years wants to be my friend again and I found out he's still friends with the ppl that he made hate me in the first place (I mean from his discord prof... | self.depression |
i feel like a fucking pariah it doesn't matter where i go, in person or online, trying my hardest to act normal or appeal to what people enjoy, whether i am stable or in a swing, if i use them as an emotional dumpster, how lonely the person i talk to is, anything really. anything meaningful always falls apart pretty fa... | self.bipolar |
Sick of being sick. Why can't i be normal? This morning I had a panic attack. I had no reason to.
What do I have to do now?
I've seen variously therapists, but they only talk.
Yes it's helpful, but it's not enough. | self.Anxiety |
How do I stop blushing? I’ve always been a blusher. When I was a kid, my friends would tease me to get me to blush. They’d say “you like (insert name here)” and is turn red regardless of what they said. That feeling of all eyes on me was enough to trigger
it
Fast forward eight years and it’s gotten worse. I blush for... | self.Anxiety |
Good songs that relate to, or are about, bipolar disorder? I like music I can relate to, I'd say the following:
Lithium by Nirvana (seems obvious)
Sleepyhead by Passion Pit reminds me of it.. "They couldn't think of something to say the day you burtst..".. that line reminds me of times I ended up in the hospital. I'v... | self.bipolar |
i am doomed what do i do now I am 24, live at home a complete beta male. my sister got drunk she called to get a ride home, she was worried about or parents finding out. I went and got her, she was wasted, not just drunk, but stoned too. She passed out on the way home, completely out, no response at all. I had never h... | self.depression |
I'm 23 and I've ruined my life. Where do I go from here? I've been on antidepressants for around 4 or 5 years, but I'm still a mess. I have no control over my emotions, my panic attacks and general anxiety lead me to ruin friendships and relationships, I have fits of rage that also lead me to say things I don't mean bu... | self.depression |
If I saw myself on the street I would walk up to him and punch him in the face [deleted] | self.depression |
I don't want to die I just want to stop existing [deleted] | self.depression |
everything hurts. this is probably the worst part: the physical pain. this has been one of the longest/saddest weeks in a while. now im just laying in bed reflecting and everything hurts, my head, my chest(this one is the worst), my stomach, even my legs. its not regular pain/soreness, i dont really know how to describ... | self.depression |
I’m a musician but I’m also depressed and stuck in life
My name is Jake I’m 18 and I’m a musician I want to do good for myself but I’m stuck in life and I don’t know what to do besides write music I have friends I have a good home with a few loving family members I’m 1000 miles away from the rest of my family in Miss... | self.depression |
(Explicit) Lost My Best Friend in a Gunfight over Drugs I am a small town kid from the midwest. I grew up in a bullshit family getting beat and taunted, told I was worthless and how Id never become powerful or successful. I no longer have memory of any aspirations or dreams, which i especially dont have.
when i was 10... | self.offmychest |
Missed dose of Effexor 5 days ago, still feeling it Missed my dose Wednesday night. Took it regularly at 7pm, realized at 3pm Thursday after beginning to feel intensely dizzy. Last few days I've felt slight dr/dp, elevated anxiety, getting spooked by unexpected stimuli, and brain zaps and brain lag. A slight bit better... | self.Anxiety |
Does anyone else find hobbies they enjoy become progressively more boring and a waste of time [deleted] | self.depression |
Every time i get close i cant do it because i dont want to hurt the few people that care [deleted] | self.SuicideWatch |
Feeling so shook up after a panic attack last week. Can't seem to get back to my normal self. Happen to anyone else? [deleted] | self.Anxiety |
Weened off Lexapro and feeling nauseous and disconnected Hey guys. So I was on Lexapro 10mg for a year after having a terrible episode of panic attacks.
3 weeks ago I weened off and at first it wasn’t so bad. I was super optimistic. It’s week 3 now and I’m feeling pretty shit. Super nauseous and flu like. Terrible co... | self.Anxiety |
What do you do when people saying they're there for you makes everything worse? Title. I got a call from one of my bosses after calling off several times in a row concerned for my well-being, and him saying that my coworkers are "rooting for [me]" made me want to go through with suicide even more.
I ran out of call o... | self.SuicideWatch |
Could you please talk with me? Hi, I'm almost 20 year old man with asperger. I recently started very hard studies of Microbiology. Unfortunately they turned out to be harder than I expected, and now I don't know what to do. I had suicidal thoughts before, I had antidepresants, but they destroyed my liver, so now I have... | self.SuicideWatch |
Worst Month of My Life Seriously Considering Killing Myself Where do I even begin?
I'm 26, I got romantically involved with a girl I knew I shouldn't have, my best friend who I live with just told me he isn't resigning our lease (so less than a months notice), so I'm about to be homeless, I lost my job yesterday, my d... | self.SuicideWatch |
Seeking advice trying to get my life back together Hi, I do not frequently post on reddit, I'm more of a lurker, but I am in a very unfortunate situation and I'm not sure what else to do. I'm just seeking advice.
I will try to explain my story briefly but there are a lot of details. I am not asking for pity, I just wa... | self.depression |
Sometimes I feel suicidal I have ADHD. Apparently we will never develop organisation skills as good as others. Since we already know the end outcome, why even try hard in life? Why not just end it now?
At least for stuff like poverty, at least there is hope that you can move up the social ladder as social mobility doe... | self.SuicideWatch |
Uncovering your Depression Has anyone else struggled with realizing and accepting their depression?
This past year I got sober, quit smoking, currently cutting out porn and sexual fantasizing and masturbation, cut down on phone use, eat less processed sugar, and I finally started going to counseling. I've become adept... | self.depression |
Isolated and severely depressed. Very obese and trying to lose weight. [deleted] | self.depression |
Trying to get help Using a throwaway possibly for obvious reasons? I’m 15 years old But over the last couple of years I’ve been feeling incredibly low and I’ve had suicidal thoughts and I haven’t wanted to go to my parents about it out of the fear they wouldn’t take me seriously but I think I’ve finally decided to tal... | self.depression |
Wholesome I never had much luck with girls, I get really anxious and generally don't talk to them for except one friend, but you know what. Today in one of my classes one of the schools hottest girl complimented me and that's it. Just that and you know what I feel good about it.
Just wanted to share | self.offmychest |
There is no point of me losing weight since I have no friends, no life, and am home schooled in a rural area unable to meet people who aren't toxic or have any interests in me. [deleted] | self.depression |
I want to die, I just don't know how to do it [deleted] | self.SuicideWatch |
Causes of Depression I've been having difficulty in concentrating and focusing, I can't study hard like I used to, i think depression dumbs me down, also I always lack sleep.
My eyesight is getting poor too, I can't read the writings on the board when I'm sitting at the 3rd row.
And it's like my mind is floating when... | self.depression |
Just wanted to get this off my chest I feel defeated. After coming home from Afghanistan, enrolling in school, and trying to push forward.... I feel nothing. Can’t get out of bed, can’t stop drinking, won’t talk to “friends”, rarely talk to family (when I do I just lie about my situation), and every time I take the cha... | self.depression |
Yes, I’m willing to pay more than $10 for a good pen like you’re willing to pay hundreds of dollars for a pair of shoes you’re only gonna wear for a few weeks. [deleted] | self.offmychest |
Is it worth it I'm an 18 year old high school senior. My life doesn't seem all bad from an outsider's perspective. My family seems happy. I'm in a good school. I'm not a problem child. But the thing is, no one can see the real you but yourself. No one knows if you're at peace or if you have a hellstorm of chaotic emot... | self.SuicideWatch |
Hazing is quite literally one of the most stupid and self destructive rituals I've ever heard about and I can't believe people in the 21st century. Preface: I'm not a member of a fraternity and I dropped out of college (I'm working towards going back but that's another topic.) In addition, Im not talking about light he... | self.offmychest |
Depressed, Anxious, and good at hiding it. So.... My short story. I've always been pretty smart, bright, succeeded in most things I've tried pretty easily or with little work. Things when I was young were always easy. In school you follow directions study and you succeed.
Until I got to med school. I experienced failu... | self.SuicideWatch |
HELP OMG I FEEL LIKE I'M DYING I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO. IT'S BEEN 3 HOURS FEELING LIKE THIS. I'M GOING CRAZY, I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO. | self.Anxiety |
It’s official! I’m bipolar. Not sure where on the spectrum just yet but we’ll figure it out. Still lots to tell my pdoc. We added seroquel to my cocktail today. Supposed to calm my racing thoughts, stabilize my moods, help me sleep. Starting at 25 mg. I don’t like all these drugs but I hate bat-shit crazy even more. Is... | self.bipolar |
Sometimes I feel like I'm not worthy to even cash a post about how I feel For some reason it feels wrong to post or talk about how I feel... I feel like I'm weak by doing so and that people will say shit about me because I'm so weak.... And even when I think about helping others, I feel like I'll cause more problems th... | self.depression |
I feel like school doesn't love me back. I'm currently enrolled in university. And I'm studying something that I don't particularly enjoy because I need to find a lucrative job when I graduate. I need a lucrative job because my parents don't make much. I go to a tech school, and I have always felt like I don't belong h... | self.offmychest |
Depression is coming back and I can feel it Hello /r/depression:
-
About 4 months ago, my significant other of 1 year suddenly broken things off with me when she decided to transfer schools, blocking me on all social media platforms and forms of communication.
Ever since then, I've been haunted on a regular basis wit... | self.depression |
I've been on Zoloft and Remeron for two weeks but having a severe uptake in suicidal thoughts [deleted] | self.depression |
Re-diagnosed Today I've spent the last 3 years being treated (off and on) for bipolar II. Today I saw a new pdoc who was absolutely wonderful. She explained medication options so I could help decide what I wanted to take. She asked tons of questions. She just generally spent a lot of time with me.
Then she asked about... | self.bipolar |
I left it just too long that I missed my chance. [deleted] | self.offmychest |
Was doing so well, then got triggered. Fuck this. [deleted] | self.Anxiety |
Does anyone else feel really bad for people who work dead end minimum wage jobs? I've worked 3 minimum wage jobs in the past few months. I just can't stand being treated like I'm replaceable and being worked to death for a small sum of money. I finally had enough and am looking at going back to a computer science degre... | self.depression |
A poem I wrote Poem
I wrote this about 6 years ago, when i was about 14
I deserve no love, or friends who care,
All I deserve is but shame and despair,
And plenty pain and much misery.
I deserve no happiness or love of loyalty,
and only sad memories I will ever bare.
Only lonely songs shall ever be sha... | self.depression |
Need to get this out of my head I know it's just a matter of time before I try kill myself again, hell it's already been almost 10 months. Do I just go for it? But what about my parents, I think it'd destroy them. They're good people who don't deserve that pain. I just want to stop feeling like this.
| self.SuicideWatch |
Need help getting over this I just got over a depressive phase was feeling pretty good then I had a job interview and I told myself I’d kill my self if I didn’t get it that’s how confident I was I didn’t get the job and now my depressive phase is back and far worse than before I know I can get another job but I wanted ... | self.bipolar |
I'm 16 and looking at myself, already see an alcoholic LOL [deleted] | self.depression |
The only logical choice is to die I'm not gonna do it right now. I still live with my parents. I've spent a while not thinking these kinds of thoughts, but lately they've been slipping back in. I don't work consistently anymore so I have plenty of time for the thoughts to creep back in.
I spent so long trying to stop... | self.SuicideWatch |
Our distressing thoughts create our distressing emotions Yes, I'm talking about cognitive behavioral therapy. And yes, some of you are going to dismiss this outright because it doesn't match what is familiar or what we want to believe. That's fine. I'm just sharing this because I know a lot of us are probably just brow... | self.bipolar |
Goal Setting Sunday 12.3.17 What goals would you like to accomplish this week? The rest of this year? Let's check in together on Saturday (and the end of the month respectively) and encourage each other in our efforts! | self.bipolar |
Tired of parents thinking cellphones is something that teens need and not a really big privilege that can be really dangerous for them. Having a cellphone gives you a lot of power that children should not have. This started with my little brother (17yo) who recently got caught for theft because of hanging out with his ... | self.offmychest |
If you agree with us that the memes, pets and pictures of pill bottles is getting old, join us in r/mentalhealthsupport. [deleted] | self.bipolar |
I really need to cry but just can’t All I can do is feel these negative emotions, but I can’t express them. I don’t know how. It’s usually a skill that people are just born with or learn at an early age, but I didn’t thanks to all the stupid things wrong with me. All I need is a long cry and I can’t even do that | self.depression |
Uncertainty about the future I don't know where my life is taking me. I feel average in almost every aspect, especially academically. I can only hope that I can somehow get out of this hole. | self.depression |
Hey, fuck me and kill me? I’d just like to clarify I’ve lost my mind. I literally can do anything. Especially now that I know I’ve got total control over my death. I’d just like to be fucked hard not by any of you fine laddies and gents of reddit, but by my life. It’s got a boner and it’s going up my ass. Better load u... | self.SuicideWatch |
Small Victory Saturday 11.11.17 / Goal Setting Sunday 11.12.17 Sorry I didn't get yesterday's post up, I had a date that went really well and I didn't expect her to stay over, so I didn't get to post before bed. What did you accomplish this last week and what do you want to achieve this week? | self.bipolar |
hello 💮 i only have one real friend. and I can’t get through the day without seeing him. I just feel like he doesn’t really care about me as much as he cares about others. I’m always the one he tells everything personal to but sometimes I just feel like he’s just way better than me and probably doesn’t even like me. :... | self.depression |
I get so depressed from working This year, I have had 5 different jobs.
The first I was at for a while, working during summer and winter breaks from college and then I just stayed for a while after graduating. I really disliked it because of the company itself, they just didn't treat their employees well and I figure... | self.depression |
Idk what to do I honestly just don't know what to do. I haven't been depressed for about 6 months and I haven't had serious suicidal thoughts for a year. Two months ago my girlfriend, and the only reason I didn't kill myself last time I fought with depression, cheated on me. 2 weeks ago we broke up, and it just hit me ... | self.SuicideWatch |
I'm so happy I'm dying tomorrow That's it
I'm happy
I have set everything
No mistakes this time
Everything is set
After learning from failed attempts I'm so happy to learn how to finally end my pathetic existence
Edit: what happened. About last night.
Well, I didn't killed myself, obviously. I spent all day cryin... | self.SuicideWatch |
i'm so tired. I feel empty. I fucked up big today and i know it's going to affect my whole family for a long time. i don't want to wake up tomorrow. i don't want to see my family. | self.SuicideWatch |
What does everyone take their Latuda with at night? I’m struggling to find things to eat that’s 350 calories before I go to bed. | self.bipolar |
How to manage overeating symptoms? I've noticed that I sometimes have issues of over spending and overeating when I'm getting hypomanic. I'll spend a lot on foood--mostly from nice-ish restaurants or delivery, and just eat an excessive amount.
What can I do to manage these symptoms? I feel like I'm not even hungry wh... | self.bipolar |
Is there actually help if you go looking for it? [deleted] | self.SuicideWatch |
kinda over it this whole week i’ve just felt empty, i almost killed myself but i was too tired to get up out of bed to get the pills. i wrote a suicide letter, i was ready. and i still am. i love my friends and family but when my depression consumes me nothing matters anymore. i’m not scared to die, im ready to go. | self.depression |
Please someone give me a job I live in South Texas and can't find work. I'm literally on the brink of just ending it all because I have no dignity. I have no money to take care of myself, I depend on others to occasionally get some cash.
The only thing I can do is honestly just sell my body and it kills me inside. I c... | self.SuicideWatch |
Truth In life people will make assumptions, and judgements. However, we can never truly know what they’re going through or how they’re feeling. A smile does not always mean someone is happy. The girl that’s just skin and bones, fights the urge to eat and purge every single day. The kid covered in bruises isn’t just som... | self.depression |
I'm completely unlikeable I'm sorry, I know it sounds self-pitying, but I'm just so alone and at such a loss for what to do and I wanted to get my feelings out. I just feel like I was born a mistake. I'm so ugly and awkward, I've been bullied in almost every grade and all they had to do was look at me. Even my first bu... | self.depression |
My fucking roommate Just need to get this off my chest. I would say work around the house is done about 70:30 split between us and I feel like I'm being generous with that statement. There are two bowls and we stick with one each. Last night he used my bowl because it didn't need cleaning and didn't wash up either afte... | self.offmychest |
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