text
stringlengths
31
99
humor
bool
2 classes
I just used volumizing shampoo for the first time.... everything sounds the same.
true
What do you get if you cross islam and capitalism? v2 allah's snackbar.
true
Here's what happens in your body when you yawn (at least in theory)
false
What is a baby elephant after he is five weeks old ? six weeks old !
true
Approval ratings drop for vulnerable gop senators in key states
false
You can't buy love, but you pay heavily for it.
true
What do you call a bear that's questioning their sexuality? a bipolar bear.
true
Why did the teacher have her hair in a bun? because she had her nose in a hamburger.
true
I just finished reading great expectations. it wasn't all i hoped it would be.
true
Hey arnold schwarzenegger, what will you be for halloween? i'll be bach
true
When is a single gay man's favorite time of the day? when he takes a shit.
true
What does deadpool need? someone to merc him shut up.
true
Two latino men grab a basketball. it was juan on juan
true
This country’s election shows the complicated role twitter plays in democracy
false
What do you call an anorexic girl that has a yeast infection? a quarter-pounder with cheese.
true
The czech city of prague is full of character and quirks
false
Which kitchen appliance tells the best jokes? the beater - he cracks everybody up!
true
An irish, blind, gay, paraplegic blonde woman is wheeled into a bar.. ow!
true
Why you should stop freaking out about the new trump poll
false
Orlando city commissioner to gop politicians: ‘you loaded those bullets with hatred'
false
How does lady gaga like her meat? raw raw rawhahaha...
true
That little dance your thumbs do when you don't know how to reply to someones text.
true
What goes cackle cackle squelch squelch? a witch in soggy trainers.
true
What do you call with a cow with a twitch? beef jerky
true
I don't play guitar, but i sure would pluck your g-string.
true
Why don't brits like revolving doors? a: because they can't hold it for the next person.
true
This carrie fisher quote casts ‘last jedi’ in a whole new light
false
How a humans of new york fundraiser taught us about education
false
Whats the hardest thing about rollerblading telling your dad you're gay
true
How do you get a sweet little old lady to say f***? get another one to yell bingo
true
I do not take credit for this joke cash or checks are fine, though.
true
What do you call an aroused eskimo dwarf? a frigid midget with a rigid digit.
true
Everyone in my house has diarrhea i guess it runs in the family
true
Power up: reboot your family's brain this summer
false
Reporter amelia rayno writes of sexual harassment from minnesota ad teague norwood
false
Nicole kidman decided to marry keith urban after less than a month of dating
false
The actual meanings behind the most mysterious and pointless emojis
false
All the times nature tried to warn us about 2016
false
I'm sorry if i looked interested. you probably caught me fantasizing about bacon.
true
To win this video game you must scrub down men in a locker room shower (nsfw)
false
Disney princess outfits just got a high fashion makeover
false
How did harry potter get down the mountain? running!... jk, rowling.
true
Most stories about reproductive issues are written by men
false
A sort of creepy reason to love costco
false
What do you call a cow with no legs? my severely diabetic sister.
true
'mean girls' director signs on for new comedy
false
14 music games and apps for budding composers
false
Hank azaria discusses the scariest part of being a dad ... so far
false
Do you have eggs for breakfast? kevin bacon
true
A little gay jewish boy: life is a cabaret?
false
Kate upton channels kate middleton... and it totally works on her (photos)
false
Visiting the sets of this year's best picture nominees (photos)
false
I didn't want to get a brain transplant. then i changed my mind.
true
Why did the californian celebrate his birthday a day earlier? he moved down-under!!
true
You know collin kapernik? can't stand that guy.........
true
5 reasons the senate must protect our communities from the keystone xl pipeline
false
Republicans are talking about donald trump like he's a preadolescent child
false
Meet the trans woman who wants to change romantic comedies
false
People cannot get over the way trump described frederick douglass
false
Why is franklin graham so obsessed with lgbtq people?
false
Dying children should be exempt from standardized tests
false
Family has epic ‘game of thrones'-inspired photo shoot for dad’s birthday
false
The mayor of flint, michigan will be fired. who will lead the city then?
true
Did you hear about the cannibal who past his uncle in the jungle?
true
What do fbi agents grill for the 4th of july? hillary.
true
If you've ever wanted to eat like lady gaga, now you can
false
New york city to pay $5.75 million to settle black inmate death lawsuit
false
Coast to coast style at high point university
false
I'm trying, but all the liam neeson jokes are taken.
true
Most computer problems stem from the lack of a fatherboard. no? ok, i'll show myself out.
true
Is thinking about doing something! now just got to think what that something will be!!!
true
How to bet on yourself and win in 2015
false
President obama, harvey weinstein: movie mogul plans $35,000-per-person fundraiser
false
Jesus wasn't a very good carpenter... i mean... he couldn't remove three nails to save his life.
true
37 ignorant things these sisters commonly hear about adoption
false
Dentist says i need to be more aggressive when flossing, so i'm going to start barking.
true
You don't really know what's pain in the ass until.. ...you've had a hemorrhoid.
true
Chris christie's environment record: why isn't he creating more jobs in offshore wind power?
false
A feminist walks into a bar long story short, she got raped.
true
If it helps, a lot of the awful ones are either married or gay, too.
true
Damn, girl. are you r/jokes? because you tell me the same stupid shit over and over.
true
What does the janitor say when he jumps out of the closet? supplies!!!!!!!!!!
true
How many tickles does it take to make an octopus ink tentickles
true
This could be the alcohol talking but.... omg you guys! the alcohol is talking!
true
College student wants people to eat chik-fil-a and ketchup off her body
false
What happened to the jewish pinokio? he tried to lie, but his nose couldn't get any longer!
true
What's white, hard, and 12 inches long? nothing.
true
Watch shailene woodley grow up right before your eyes
false
Knock knock... who's there? the pilot, let me in.
true
The startling image that opened my eyes about my daughter's education
false
What do you call a man who makes fart scented candles? incense-itive
true
You're like the menstrual cramp and bloating of people.
true
Toddlers run just like a 70s stuntman engulfed in flames.
true
Snapchat is making sunglasses with a built-in camera
false
My wife is like a delicious strawberry popsicle. cold on the inside and 90% artificial.
true
Date: are you a dog person or a cat person? dog: cat person, definitely.
true
Alicia keys sings 'gummi bears' theme song on 'fallon' (video)
false
What time do you go to the dentist? tooth - hurty! xd
true
Toilet stolen from police station cops have nothing to go on.
true
Ginnifer goodwin's home combines flea market style with sophistication (photos)
false