text stringlengths 31 99 | humor bool 2
classes |
|---|---|
How to experience the benefits of exercise without moving | false |
In australia, lawsuits are just what lawyers wear to court. | true |
What's the difference between michael jackson and disney movies ? disney movies still touch kids | true |
Knock knock ! whos there? wilma wilma whom? wilma dickfit. | true |
What is the opposite of paranoia? thinking you are following someone. | true |
Emmy rossum: i love those gross pimple popping videos | false |
What goes in hard and comes out soft and sticky? gum. | true |
Shia labeouf wears head bandage after injury on set | false |
Facing the truth: determining the warning signs of a bully | false |
What do you call a burberry style transforming truck? optimush prime... hahaaa. | true |
What do you call a black mage? a negro-mancer | true |
San francisco police have 'institutionalized bias' against minorities, feds find | false |
6 new jersey newspapers call on christie to resign | false |
Of all the horrible ways to die i think healthy eating sounds the most painful. | true |
25 years after berlin, do we still need walls? | false |
New york times decides not to fire glenn thrush after accusations of misconduct | false |
My grandmother is an inspiration! at 84 years old she went to medical school. she's a cadaver. | true |
Apparently kanye dropped a new album on an obscure platform. torrent. | true |
What do you get when you cross a chief with a black belt? kung food! | true |
I am a product of privilege and you are, too | false |
Did you hear about the guy ducking charges of sheep rape? he's on the lam. | true |
Cheating texts: does sending flirty text messages constitute cheating? (video) | false |
Recipes made with potato chips: from chicken fingers to cheesecake | false |
Nothing waters down the word ultimate like ultimate frisbee. | true |
Beyoncé and solange's dad finally speaks about that infamous elevator fight | false |
Brazil police free mother-in-law of formula one impresario, arrest 2 suspects | false |
I don't have the faintest idea why i passed out just a short pun | true |
Box office totals place 'after earth' behind 'fast 6,' 'now you see me' | false |
Catherine zeta-jones is spending time apart from michael douglas, but will that work? | false |
Why was 6 afraid of 7? because 7 was a 6 offender. | true |
Mom of boy who brought gun to class hears her fate | false |
Gay 'conversion therapy' is now illegal in maryland | false |
10 things brides and grooms should know about photographers | false |
What does a llama do when it goes on holidays? alpaca ya bags. | true |
Why the first unionized political campaign is a game-changer for the left | false |
What colour does a smurf turn when you choke it? i don't know, i was too busy masturbating. | true |
How can you tell you're at a gay cookout? the hotdogs smell like shit. | true |
What do you call it when batman leaves religion christian bale | true |
Zooey deschanel, russell brand texting? no, says 'new girl' star | false |
Making cookies? be sure to save some of the dough so you can start gorging while they're baking | true |
Stuffs more popcorn in my face* why don't bad guys in movies just paint the red wire green? | true |
Usually i'm quite good at telling jokes, but sometimes i get excited and punchup the fuckline. | true |
What do you call a parrot that flew away? a polygon! | true |
How do you make a butterfly ? flick it out of the butter dish with a knife ! | true |
What did adam say when he broke up with eve? i'm turning over a new leaf. | true |
'csi: ny' actor opens up about becoming a single dad after adopting a son | false |
Why didn't johnny depp get an oscar nod for black mass? the nominee pool was whitey-nough already | true |
What did the spanish musician say when he went fishing? castanets! | true |
*looks up from phone* kids!! we're leaving the playground in 22 percent. | true |
Urban backyards: 5 ways city-dwellers can use small outdoor spaces | false |
Senate aims to vote on defunding planned parenthood | false |
10 mediterranean islands to get away from it all | false |
How do you know if a homeless person has a girlfriend? his clean fingers. | true |
If batman left church early... would it be a christian bale? | true |
Asthma patients could face higher risk of bone loss | false |
I once met a republican feminist she told me to czech my privilege. | true |
I heard about this new sex position that i really want to try. it's called: with another person. | true |
Judge who sentenced brock turner believed he was sorry | false |
Why are men like blenders? you need one but you're not quite sure why. | true |
What's the difference between a ferrari and a boner? ...i have a boner. | true |
Use the forceps, luke! - obi gyn kenobi | true |
John kasich supports ohio bill that would ban abortions for down syndrome | false |
Where do bears go after smoking some weed? hibearnation | true |
Donald trump's poll numbers are closer to 'dead' than 'dead heat' | false |
Samira wiley says 'handmaid's tale' season 2 will show parts of gilead we've never seen | false |
Puppies for sale: the truth about the global pet industry | false |
A tombstone that has a scrolling led marquee of your greatest tweets. | true |
Using a butter knife on steak... it just doesn't cut it. | true |
Why did the blonde stare at a frozen orange juice can for 2 hours? because it said concentrate! | true |
'80s rocker richard marx says he helped subdue violent jet passenger | false |
Raising adam: the importance of teaching standards to children | false |
Injectable foam blocks internal bleeding on the battlefield | false |
What the difference between the u.s. government and a bucket of crap? the bucket | true |
Kim kardashian chooses sandals over stilettos for lunch date (photos) | false |
Terrifying musical number imagines a world without internet | false |
How to plan the adventure of a lifetime in malaysian borneo | false |
Get off your high horse! - veterinarian who prescribed medical marijuana. | true |
What do you call a homosexual hispanic peeping tom? peeko-da-guyo. | true |
Why do so many math majors confuse halloween and christmas? because oct 31 is dec 25 | true |
My uncle paul does great bird impressions, he eats worms. | true |
Glenn beck calls james comey's letter 'one of the most irresponsible things to ever happen' | false |
I went off on a tan gent once he was wasting all his time at the beach | true |
Do russians only write in lower case letters? i mean, they hate capitalism. | true |
My best friend won't talk to me. it's because he is a dog. | true |
If you told me 100% of serial killers were morning people i'd believe you. | true |
What's a shrimp boat captain's favorite drink? hi-c | true |
Delete cookies? why on earth would i want to do that?! i love cookies. | true |
Need a professional cat photo? call the 'purrtraitist' | false |
How do trains fall in love? it attracks another one. | true |
Gene hackman is my favorite actor whose name sounds like a job description at monsanto | true |
Brain lesions may develop at higher rate among women who get migraines, study suggests | false |
Urban meyer's buckeyes will come up big against michigan state | false |
How charlie sheen helped reignite this aids activist's passion | false |
Pastors struggle to bring healing after oregon shooting | false |
Q: what is the difference between blondes and traffic signs? a: some traffic signs say stop. | true |
The natural experiment in ukraine every american voter should know about | false |
Jeb bush vows to shake up the culture of washington if elected president | false |
Condoleeza rice tells grads to find people they disagree with | false |
The most beautiful cotton candy you may ever see | false |
What's the most sensitive part on a female dinosaur? her clitosaurus... | true |
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