text stringlengths 31 99 | humor bool 2
classes |
|---|---|
Andrew zimmern and ibm want to put meat in your cocktail | false |
Do not track kids act of 2013 introduced in congress | false |
What do you call christopher reeve before the accident? christopher walken. | true |
By a show of hands, who has hands? sit down leonard, you're a seahorse. | true |
What is macauley culkins favorite salad dressing? neverland ranch. | true |
Weekend roundup: how will greece take its hemlock? | false |
Jimmy kimmel's 'skating or sneezing' game should be a new winter olympic sport | false |
What do you call an amish guy with his hand up a horses ass? mechanic. | true |
How do you make apple jelly? google maps. | true |
If a gifted child is put up for adoption, is he a regifted child? | true |
How one company wants to make traveling safer for gay couples | false |
Wisconsin judge strikes down scott walker's right-to-work law as unconstitutional | false |
What do you call an autistic stoner? a baked potato | true |
Pope francis is saying what the world needs to hear | false |
A rapist, paedophile and priest enter a bar. he orders a beer. | true |
Over-the-top tech headquarters might be more trouble than they're worth | false |
Marco rubio to attend gop convention, support guy he called a 'con man' | false |
Turkey detains amnesty international staffers, accuses them of belonging to terror group | false |
Why do jewish people have big noses because air is free | true |
Why did god create the orgasm? so women can moan even when they're happy. | true |
Big mac creator jim delligatti dies at 98 | false |
'bohemian rhapsody' as a live-action film is a frightening crime drama | false |
Gop 'yelling at dying people' strategy not paying off yet | false |
Hillary clinton's barking dog impression is totally paw-some | false |
It only took four men to wallpaper my house, but i had to slice them really thin. | true |
Tip #1: create your own military-civilian welcome wagon | false |
What do you call a muslim on an airplane? a passenger you racist fuck. | true |
Danish submarine owner admits dismembering body of swedish journalist | false |
The entire gop should be ashamed of themselves | false |
What happens when two dogs breed in a pound? dog pound dog pounds dog pound dog. | true |
If you lead a student to vegetables, will they eat them? | false |
Neil gorsuch shows his hand on money in politics as court turns down big case | false |
What do you call two doctors with the same career? pair of medics. | true |
How to live on an rv to save money | false |
Why would the jewish cannibal eat you? for-skin | true |
What's thanksgiving like in space? nasa astronauts on the iss clue us in (video) | false |
What's the best wood to make a golf club out of? taiga wood | true |
Where does david cameron keep his hidden money? in the piggy bank | true |
Man's unexpected reaction to teen who held him up at knifepoint retold in powerful video | false |
Dark humor what is green and turns red, when you press the button? a frog in a blender | true |
Fans turn the tables on john cena with emotional surprise. get those tissues ready. | false |
Feel the sticker shock of someone who lives in poverty | false |
Why should you never high five someone in the gallows... because they always leave you hang'n | true |
Make pillows fluffy again by drying them with a tennis ball | false |
The past, the present, and the future walk into a bar... it was in tense. | true |
Selma blair's amazing flat shoes top our cheap celeb finds list | false |
Senate judiciary committee has 2 black members for first time in its history | false |
What do you call the dirty jobs guy beating someone up? a mike rowe aggression | true |
Overwhelmed, time-strapped mom of 3 says she goes 4 days without showering | false |
'snow white and the huntsman' wins the box office, passes 'men in black 3' with $56.3 million | false |
The economist sounds off on trump with cover showing kkk hood as his megaphone | false |
Bomb threats target jewish community centers for third time in a month | false |
Mcdonald's uses canola oil, five guys uses peanut oil, and taco bell uses... castor oil | true |
When does a gas become a liquid? when it stains your underwear. | true |
Why was the lego boxer unmatched in the ring? he was a master of blocking attacks. | true |
Seth meyers nails what trump means when he says 'law and order' | false |
Most employers won't drop health care coverage because of obamacare: survey | false |
There's no excuse for laziness.. but if you find one, let me know. | true |
Look how far victorian moms went for the perfect photo | false |
What did the sign on the whore house door say? beat it, we're closed. | true |
What goes dot dot dash squeak ? mouse code ! | true |
*tries to get makeup off* makeup: i have a boyfriend. | true |
South korea's park asks parliament to decide how she can quit | false |
Bob marley's childhood home was as vibrant as the musician (photo) | false |
Explosive trump book to release early after president's lawyer tried to stop it | false |
Where does dragon milk come from? a cow with short legs. | true |
How do you tell the time in the us? by looking at a bomb | true |
Stockton bankruptcy the result of 15-year spending binge | false |
Riomaggiore, italy is the most beautiful place in the world right now | false |
Black lives and police integrity depend on police joining the cause for reform | false |
You can tell im drunk by the number of made-up words i concoctulate | true |
I don't always give women orgasms, but when i do... i let them swallow. | true |
What did the boy cat say to the girl cat on valentine's day? you're purrr-fect for me! | true |
Troye sivan says playing a conversion therapy survivor was 'intense' | false |
I heard there's a woman going about with twelve nipples. sounds absurd. dozen tit. | true |
Dracula why is dracula's favorite subject in school math? because he likes to count. | true |
Did you hear about the ghoul's favorite hotel? it had running rot and mould in every room. | true |
What was the name of the indian dj? sikh beats. | true |
Yo mama is so fat she provides shelter to the people in nepal | true |
What do cutters and heroin addicts have in common? long sleeves. | true |
My middle finger is always ready to give you a standing ovation after you say something stupid. | true |
What was the philosopher's last thought before he descended into quicksand? i sink therefore i am. | true |
No 'military forces' will be used in deportations, trump officials say | false |
Sometimes my dog looks super fucking delicious. #asianpeopleproblems | true |
I told my parents i wanted a panda for christmas. all i got was a white x6 | true |
Nearly half of americans believe in at least one medical conspiracy theory, according to new report | false |
The tyranny of the nanny state, where the government knows what's best for you | false |
Ben bernanke optimistic about future innovation in commencement address | false |
Reeva steenkamp can ‘rest in peace' after oscar pistorius’ sentence doubled, her family says | false |
Nice guys don't finish last, fat guys do. | true |
Ellen degeneres responds to divorce rumors as only she can | false |
The email investigation and the tools of ignorance | false |
Eric trump gets ravaged on twitter after his proud 'jeopardy!' moment | false |
What's the difference between a plumber and a scientist? pronounce this word: unionized | true |
Al gore should have had a band named the algorehythms. courtesy of my dad at lunch today. | true |
Don't die a virgin!!! ...seriously there are terrorists up there waiting for you! | true |
Two birds with one stone, how about all the birds god thinks, hurling an asteroid toward earth | true |
I just ate 4 cans of alphabet soup. i'm going to have the best vowel movement. | true |
This man makes sure foster youth have a place to call their own this christmas | false |
What's the definition of trust? two cannibals giving each other head | true |
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