text stringlengths 31 99 | humor bool 2
classes |
|---|---|
My brother and i know everything between the two of us. go ahead, ask something... | true |
How do you get a jewish girl's number? just check her arm | true |
Why do you keep telling me to be afraid? | false |
Ask the attorney: step-parent adoption - canon-mcmillan, pa patch | false |
'maxi pad bandit' arrested despite fiendishly clever disguise | false |
Alessandra ambrosio's 'funny or die' cameo proves the model has a sense of humor (video) | false |
Fyi (if you're a condescending mom of boys) | false |
There are 10 kinds of people in this world. those who understand binary and those who don't. | true |
If you get cold, just stand in a corner for a little bit. they're usually 90 degrees. | true |
Are you lactose intolerant? if so, you won't be able to handle this cheesy joke | true |
Intensive athletic activity could be fatal to those with sickle-cell trait | false |
Lima: a city rich with history, culture and love | false |
What's the difference between jam and jelly? you can't jelly your dick down a whore's throat. | true |
Girl are you a plumber? cause i wanna make you moen | true |
Carmelo anthony during team usa singalong sums up your feelings on participation | false |
Feel more generous by reflecting on moments you've given, not received: study | false |
How do you call a gay person from russia? sergei. | true |
South african traffic cop stops traffic with his dance moves | false |
Iphone gadget turns any surface into a musical instrument | false |
Alex rodriguez shopping woes after niece charges $17,600 in clothes to his amex | false |
How to pick the right restaurant when traveling | false |
The road to success is always under construction. | true |
How do you stop a black kid from jumping on the bed? tape velcro to the ceiling. | true |
What is the most racist type of bread? a biguette | true |
This passenger raised money to send an olympian's uber-driving dad to rio | false |
Troy aikman antes up $1.75 million in divorce settlement | false |
Counting whales in hawaii might be the best volunteer program ever | false |
Job growth slows in last two months, unemployment still 5.1 percent | false |
How to store a silk scarf to prevent wrinkles and stay organized (photos) | false |
I lost my thesaurus when i was little... i couldn't find the words to describe how i felt. | true |
What do a dog and a near-sighted gynecologist have in common? they both have wet noses. | true |
Nothing in the history of the english language has backfired more than the phrase calm down. | true |
John orozco breaks down after qualifying for usa gymnastics team | false |
Gisele bundchen is the new face of chanel cosmetics (photos) | false |
The abortion tipping point: when 'i'm pregnant!' stops being the end of the world | false |
How to deal with the islamic state? arm the kurds | false |
Sen. tammy duckworth slams jeff sessions' disability rights record | false |
What do you call a legless man at the beach during high tide? fucked. | true |
Why did steve jobs decline chemotherapy? because an apple a day keeps the doctor away. | true |
A lot of things can be preserved in alcohol. my dignity is not one of them. | true |
Disability advocates arrested at rob portman's columbus office | false |
So a jewish pedophile walks up to a kid and says hey want to buy some candy? | true |
Trump reportedly plans to end national arts funding | false |
Why do potheads only steal from other potheads? otherwise there's nothing worth toking. | true |
So i found out i have ibs last week... the doctor said i have shitty genes | true |
Don't be easy to get because you'll be easy to forget. | true |
When the smoke detector goes off, it's time to flip the grilled cheese sandwich. | true |
What we know so far about enrique marquez, the first person charged in the san bernardino attack | false |
Mariah carey to star in a series for e! | false |
What do you call a foreskin found on a crime scene? circumcisional evidence. | true |
I don't really like marxists... ...they have no class. | true |
Should toddlers use ipads? experts agree moderation is key | false |
4 active international vacations for empty nesters (photos) | false |
Q: what's green and has wheels? a: grass. i lied about the wheels. | true |
Obama could end the slaughter in yemen within hours | false |
Why did the little kid dance on the jar of jam? because the top said twist to open. | true |
This school network is recruiting its own graduates to diversify its teaching force | false |
4 skin issues that can be solved by a good night's sleep | false |
I'd write a rap song... ..but i'm too lay-z | true |
Jill stein defends pennsylvania recount efforts in trump tower speech | false |
Loltwitter is better with friends. we found some people you might know. block block block block | true |
Fbi agent: bob vulfov, looking for a bathroom | true |
Maddie poppe wins 'american idol' after runner-up reveals they're dating | false |
Old lady is not impressed with this public proposal | false |
Missing a period is probably a grammar nazi's worst nightmare. | true |
When skinny girls say i'm so fat to fish for a compliment from me, i just agree. | true |
9 spring salads you'll want to dive into (really) | false |
The most popular music videos of 2013 are miley cyrus' 'wrecking ball' and 'we can't stop' | false |
If you die in a plane crash, you also die in real life. that's just what i heard. | true |
A 'sopranos' tour of new york and new jersey | false |
How does a french lady hold her liquor? by the ears | true |
Heartwarming ad shows why dads are superheroes to their kids | false |
Montana gop house candidates push for obama impeachment | false |
What's the difference between a lawyer and whore? the lawyer can't guarantee to get you off. | true |
3 very different babies showed me the way | false |
I witnessed a kidnapping on the bus today... but don't worry, he woke up before his stop. | true |
Why mindful eating is so hard and why you should do it anyway | false |
I can see smoke on the horizon. god i hope it's rest of monday burning to the ground | true |
Are trees really necessary? they seem kind of arbor-trary. | true |
Andreas lubitz. is the first german pilot to record 150 kills in 70 years. | true |
Tom ford on oscars red carpet: bubble of 1950s barbie clothes | false |
Leaked memo tells senate candidate to spend 80 percent of her time raising money | false |
She said i was average. that's just mean. | true |
Roses are red, your body is fine, i know we just met, but your place or mine? | true |
Unluckiest couple celebrates $52 million lottery win, then weeps | false |
10 funny doormats that completely spoke our minds | false |
While i might feel unsure how to react, my middle finger is well versed in handling stupid people. | true |
I like my coffee like i like my wife... cold and bitter. | true |
Interview: director gavin hood on eye in the sky, drone warfare, and alan rickman | false |
These kids already understand the meaning of black lives matter | false |
Hey dad i'm tired! there's a nap for that. :) | true |
Non-profits and social media: turning offline events into online engagement | false |
What the star of the 'roots' reboot wants every young black man to know | false |
Adam charlap hyman's brooklyn home is the perfect example of small space style (photos) | false |
I lost weight: pam holmes tracked her calorie intake and lost more than 175 pounds | false |
Remember kids, dark humour is like food... not everybody gets it. | true |
Talks to reform ferguson, missouri police make progress | false |
Best man 'speech' isn't really a speech at all (video) | false |
Chrissy teigen and john legend bring their love 'back to where it all began' | false |
Can i borrow your cellphone? i need to call animal control cause i just saw a fox! | true |
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