text stringlengths 31 99 | humor bool 2
classes |
|---|---|
'breaking bad' finale ads cost as much as $400,000: report | false |
Congress won't act on guns, but it might help mental health | false |
Confuse your doctor by putting on rubber gloves at the same time he does. | true |
I spent over an hour at my wife's grave yesterday... whew, that was the longest i've ever lasted | true |
Serena and venus williams on a u.s. open collision course | false |
New zealand has a cave full of glow worms, and you should go inside it | false |
Why does everything taste like chicken? because god is black. | true |
House bill would make it harder to prosecute white-collar crime | false |
What did the clam with a lisp say to his greedy friend? you're so shelfish! | true |
What would you call a bisexual black man? vinegar | true |
Italian woman explains italian hand gestures and now we all get it | false |
Why did the energizer bunny go to jail? he got charged with battery | true |
What's the difference between a snow-man and a snow-woman? snowballs. | true |
I hated my job as an origami teacher. too much paperwork. | true |
I cannot breath, walk, or bend over but dayum these skinny jeans look good. | true |
Federal court invalidates part of texas congressional map | false |
You miss 100% of the shots you don't take... -lee harvey oswald | true |
How does a grizzly catch fish? with his bear hands! | true |
Sanders dings clinton over '90s welfare reform, saying it hurt the 'very vulnerable' | false |
What do you do if an elephant comes through your window? swim for it... | true |
The ultimate goal in grief: embracing a new life | false |
Reagan's son rails against trump in fiery tweetstorm | false |
Yo mama's so fat, she jumped up in the air and got stuck. | true |
Aristocracy or meritocracy? just 3 percent of kids at top colleges are low-income | false |
10 heart-melting cheesy comfort foods including pumpkin mac & cheese | false |
Norway's arctic oil lawsuit offers hope for a new era of climate litigation | false |
I think it's cute how my bankruptcy attorney thinks i'm going to pay him! | true |
What do you get when you goose a ghost? a handful of sheet! | true |
What's the difference between jelly and jam? well you can jelly your cock up her ass! | true |
Proof that red bull can't possibly give you wings | false |
What's donald trump's favorite pink floyd album? the dark side of the moon... what a filthy casual. | true |
Study: us cities have worse inequality than mexico, with rich and poor living side-by-side | false |
Once this cunning guy had a drum but a real problem with it a conundrum some might say. | true |
Senate paid out $1.45 million in discrimination settlements since 1997, data shows | false |
I wonder what twitter employees do at work to waste time | true |
I have a photographic memory it just hasn't developed yet | true |
Kate hudson wants to make an album and doesn't care what you think | false |
One thing you shouldn't do when you're stressed | false |
Notorious subway joy-rider steals nj bus, nyc police say | false |
Tax scam: irs warns of tax scam targeting military members | false |
I was having an argument with my deaf wife. all women are the same, they don't listen. | true |
How many highlanders does it take to screw in a lightbulb? there can be only one. | true |
The breastfeeding chronicles: 'i wish people could just say it was awesome' | false |
Man pays college parking tickets 40 years after graduating | false |
Hey reddit, what are your favorite lame jokes? wanna hear a pizza joke? nevermind, it's too cheesy. | true |
National french fry day: is there such a thing as a healthy french fry? | false |
Carrie is my favourite movie about how religious faith leads to supernatural mass murder. | true |
What do you call an angry pirate? a pirate (a mix between pirate and irate) | true |
Herpes sounds like the name of a greek god | true |
What does a sick train say? achoo achoo! | true |
Too old to drive? think again, google to the rescue. | false |
Own a vizio smart tv? it's watching you. | false |
Your ideal workout is sweaty, effective and fun | false |
Cool story bro, needs more dragons and shit - how game of thrones started, probably. | true |
I joined a reggae band playing the triangle. i just stand at the back and ting. | true |
What is the cutest piece of clothing? cutie | true |
I was an emotional wedding. even the cake was in tiers. | true |
Whatever you do, do not give this to a toddler | false |
What do you call a supernatural goose riding a bike seeking vengeance? goose rider | true |
I ate an optimist once, but i couldn't keep him down | true |
Did you see matt damon's character in invictus? that's apartheid like to play. | true |
My girlfriend was just about to eat my extra long sausage but then i caught the fat bitch | true |
Hundreds of palestinians in israeli jails begin hunger strike | false |
U.s. economy adds 173,000 jobs; unemployment falls to 5.1 percent | false |
5 bold ways to reach your goals (and love your life) | false |
Son: dad can sand melt? me putting down my glass: don't be ridiculous of course it can't | true |
Jill stein drops pennsylvania recount effort over expenses | false |
I would not want to have to pay carly rae jepsen's phone bill. | true |
Did you know? on average, people are pretty mean. | true |
Why do scuba-divers go in backwards? because if they went forward they'd fall in the boat. | true |
What doctors need to learn about death and dying | false |
11 things that helped people everywhere love their bodies in 2014 | false |
How do you kill 15 flies at once? slap an african child in the face. | true |
Donald trump to nominate christopher a. wray for fbi director | false |
The fabric of our lives? why so epic, cotton? | true |
The best playground is the one nature provided | false |
Why do millions of the world’s most vulnerable children keep getting left behind? | false |
In all fairness, trump can't release his tax returns at least not until putin sends him his w2s. | true |
This baby kangaroo just wants some personal time, okay? | false |
America's top cop wages a long battle to dial back the drug war | false |
What do you call the outside of a hand gren-egg ? the bombshell ! | true |
What's the name of the pokemon that causes birth defects? zikachu | true |
How to 2 mexicans settle a argument by going juan on juan | true |
Calvin harris' throwback photo proves he was once an awkward teen like the rest of us | false |
No, franklin graham. removal of ten commandments monument is nothing like isis rampages | false |
Noah jeffrey, toddler, crawls inside toy vending machine in australia, hands out items | false |
Why did the man with a stammer never get out of jail? he couldn't finish his sentence. | true |
Aspirin may reduce colon cancer risk, but at what cost? | false |
All around pizza offers 15 percent discount to gun owners in virginia beach (video) | false |
Are nuclear plants safe in hurricanes? incident during sandy suggests they may not be | false |
What does a paint brush eat for dinner? bristoles! | true |
Emboldened by trump, hungary hardens draconian refugee policies | false |
What do you call a lesbian dinosaur? lickalottapuss | true |
Comedians crash mike pence rally to save him from trump's sinking ship | false |
What type of pants does mario wear? denim, denim, denim. | true |
I was addicted to the hokey pokey... but i turned myself around. | true |
Apple needs to build a product for older gentlemen who have become fathers. ipop | true |
What do penguins do in a race? they peng-win | true |
Why did the elephant sit on the marshmallow? so he wouldn't fall into the hot chocolate. | true |
A buddhist monk walks up to a hotdog vender and says make me one with everything | true |
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