start_date stringlengths 10 10 | end_date stringlengths 10 10 | thread_id stringlengths 8 10 ⌀ | subreddit stringclasses 1
value | subreddit_id stringclasses 1
value | total_score int64 -564 194k | text stringlengths 52 58.9k | num_messages int64 3 160 | avg_score float64 -55.17 14.3k |
|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|
1402354454 | 1402432649 | t3_27ql60 | t5_2to41 | 260 | Fister__Mantastic: TIFU by getting the world's most lethal toxin in my eye.
Edit: To address some common concerns, I have been communication with my clinic manager every step of the way. The entire incident has been well documented this far. My ophthalmologist was nice enough to schedule me in after hours tomorrow to c... | 9 | 28.888889 | |
1402353952 | 1402420714 | t3_27qke3 | t5_2to41 | 55 | SmoothWay: TIFU by running something over with the lawn mower
Today I was mowing the little private beach in my neighborhood, something I do on a weekly basis. I was out of town for a little bit so it had been nearly two weeks since my last trim. This had caused the grass to grow much more, to the point that I couldn'... | 6 | 9.166667 | |
1402355613 | 1402356779 | t3_27qmyi | t5_2to41 | 6 | [deleted]: TIFU by forgetting my milk [A little NSFW]
DatchEnvy: oh god. How do people come up with this?
Zalzanane: I'm scared.
| 3 | 2 | |
1402356283 | 1402362964 | t3_27qo3k | t5_2to41 | 31 | ineedtoremeber: TIFU by laughing at the worst time possible.
So today in history class we were watching Schindler's List for some end of the year filler stuff. I have already seen Schindler's List so I was completely tuned out.
SPOILERS BELOW
So I was reading this piece from 27/6 about a [permission slip](http://www.... | 4 | 7.75 | |
1402359725 | 1402366335 | t3_27qtaq | t5_2to41 | 16 | djewkris: TIFU by picking a fight with a wall with my foot
So last night started out great. It's my 21st birthday and all my friends are in town to celebrate as a group downtown for the first time ever. I get pretty drunk (people kept buying me shots and I couldn't just say no) and we decide to head home.
As we dri... | 9 | 1.777778 | |
1402359185 | 1402361271 | t3_27qsga | t5_2to41 | 11 | OC4815162342: TIFU by buying the wrong sized rings
I spent $300 on a scope and I buy the wrong rings for it. I was planning on meeting with a buddy I haven't seen in years to go shoot and now I can't. Great.
Can_Pilot: this is a Today, I made a mild error
OC4815162342: Its aggravating and time consuming. I have to re... | 3 | 3.666667 | |
1402361636 | 1402501410 | t3_27qw4h | t5_2to41 | 34 | ta-oopsie: TIFUpdate: I slept with my best friend's mom. Twice.
My post got way more attention than I expected. It was at around 50 replies or so when I had last seen it, but someone I know told me they saw it and figured out who I was, so I checked it out. This is a throwaway, my regular account will remain anonymous.... | 6 | 5.666667 | |
1402357597 | 1402495425 | t3_27qq36 | t5_2to41 | 15 | Fleeing_Badger: TIFU by kinda selling my bike to myself.
Basically i was selling my bike on ebay and someone messaged me to ask whether i would accept cash off ebay and how much. So i replied to him with a price, all was good, what i never realised was that i get an email saying that i sent a message to him. I saw this... | 8 | 1.875 | |
1402361042 | 1402437787 | t3_27qv8e | t5_2to41 | 139 | Dyson_Disaster: TIFU by putting my ballsack into a Dyson AirBlade
So Saturday night, myself and a few good buds are out at a trendy bar going through our usual routine: 1) drink, 2) goof off, 3) "spit game" at cute girls, and 4) dance like idiots. 9 times out of 10, this routine ends with three or four of us dudes eati... | 7 | 19.857143 | |
1402365382 | 1402585711 | t3_27r1ma | t5_2to41 | 129 | [deleted]: TIFU by being high and horny
Fuck throwaways!
This morning at about 2AM i was fairly high on some drugs of my choice when I started to get a little stirring in my pants. I decided to go ahead do something about this but about halfway through my hand was hurting because of a rather big cut i have from cutti... | 6 | 21.5 | |
1402365439 | 1402426754 | t3_27r1pd | t5_2to41 | 9 | blahblahblahbu: TIFU by reading manga in a class
So today I fucked up. This what happened to me in one of my university classes. I have one of my evening classes that is from 6-9. The class is pretty boring, and no amounts of coffee will make me to stay awake. SO i decided to bring manga to class.
Well, it is not big... | 6 | 1.5 | |
1402363949 | 1402380564 | t3_27qzjj | t5_2to41 | 15 | [deleted]: TIFU by adjusting my package and picking my nose.
So here's how it is. My girlfriend had a bad day at work, so I decided to cook for her when she got home. I made some bomb ass Asian chicken and rice. It was tasty as hell. To spice it up, I sliced up a Thai chili pepper.
I'm sure you can see where this ... | 6 | 2.5 | |
1402370681 | 1402382381 | t3_27r9fx | t5_2to41 | 11 | ZzombieJesus: TIFU by spraying tea tree oil on my nuts!
I have athletes foot and jock itch. Was talking to my mom yesterday and she just happened to have a list for what tea tree oil cures (apparently a lot) Such as athetes foot, jock itch, exema, warts and a more. Well, I picked some up after work and sprayed it on m... | 4 | 2.75 | |
1402372040 | 1402504230 | t3_27rbdk | t5_2to41 | 20 | say592: TIFU by Repeatedly Shouting "I'm a goat!"
This fuckup is brought to you by my wife.
Ever since Goat Simulator came out, my wife has this fun thing where she will randomly ram me with her head and shout "I'm a goat!". Its actually pretty hilarious. She also suffers from a condition that gives her grueling migr... | 10 | 2 | |
1402370175 | 1402413065 | t3_27r8q9 | t5_2to41 | 16 | [deleted]: TIFU by losing a handgun
My father gave me a .45 way back when. Well, actually when I was a teenager I took it from him, he knew one day it would be mine and that was that.
For the past 5 years I've been storing it in a big Rubbermaid tote with last seasons clothes.
Just last night I was getting ready to ... | 4 | 4 | |
1402374328 | 1402379668 | t3_27ref4 | t5_2to41 | 7 | nolubelarry: TIFU by surprising my girlfriend with intercourse
MyCreatedAccount: Hmm, who sleeps in a spare bedroom in their own home?
MonkeyTails33: Who says provide intercourse
MyCreatedAccount: I was saying either it is fake or she knows about the roleplay, so yeah.
| 4 | 1.75 | |
1402375338 | 1402417155 | t3_27rfni | t5_2to41 | 17 | [deleted]: TIFU by asking friend for a selfie
After pestering my new online friend for a selfie, I *complimented* him by telling him he looks like the tranny version of his cousin. She is a beautiful girl, he just happens to be a boy. Now he thinks I called him ugly and I can't un-see his cousin every time I talk to hi... | 11 | 1.545455 | |
1402379194 | 1403171994 | t3_27rk4b | t5_2to41 | 212 | PotatoErection: TIFU by smoking Opium
Editr: This actually happened last night, but its been less than 24 hours so I think it counts as 'today'.
I am a student studying abroad in China. I have a few days off from classes do I decided it would be a great time to do some traveling/hiking in the Yunnan province (Southwes... | 10 | 21.2 | |
1402380097 | 1402465488 | t3_27rl29 | t5_2to41 | 78 | GlueonBallsthrowaway: TIFU by masturbating with hair gel [NSFW]
Throwaway because one of my friends is a redditor. I'm your average 15- year- old male, and I masturbate a lot because who doesn't? Anyway, I was in my room when I suddenly felt horny. I got up to go to the bathroom to have a quick wank session and I saw t... | 5 | 15.6 | |
1402371630 | 1402442004 | t3_27rat6 | t5_2to41 | 10 | PancakesandMaggots: TIFU by not fully reading a r/funny title in front of my girlfriend.
Just browsing through r/funny with my SO when I clicked on a link without noticing the NSFW tag (its the one talking about cosplay if anyone is asking), and boom a 28 inch computer screen filled with the picture of a naked lady in ... | 3 | 3.333333 | |
1402369983 | 1402400327 | t3_27r8fa | t5_2to41 | 11 | mrainbalfunction: TIFU by pissing myself before I even had my coffee.
This morning I woke up groggy as hell from the 4 hours of sleep I am allowed on the glorious space between the end of an closing shift and the beginning of an opening shift.
After smashing the snooze button for the fiftieth time and mustering up the... | 3 | 3.666667 | |
1402384471 | 1402455410 | t3_27rp8c | t5_2to41 | 41 | 2balls1hidden: TIFU by masturbating upside down
I was edging for about two hours, which peaked about five minutes ago. Right when I peaked, I was so horny that I decided to masturbate upside down with my legs against the wall at a 90 degree angle, so that I could "shoot" further onto my chest.
I had the strongest org... | 5 | 8.2 | |
1402384386 | 1402430531 | t3_27rp5w | t5_2to41 | 61 | contraben: TIFU by getting liquid solder in my eye.
I was doing electronics at school in a tech class. I was soldering a resistor to a circuit. I soldered the first little metal arm thing. But when I went to solder the second one it didn't want to stay down so I used a nail to hold it as I put the solder on. Having put... | 4 | 15.25 | |
1402382818 | 1402400449 | t3_27rnpq | t5_2to41 | 23 | Noonewon1: TIFU by sending a mass email without using BCC, sharing my workplaces entire email database with competitors
I work in sales. My boss asked me to come up with a series of email ads for a product. He gave me access to our email database, and asked me to use it to distribute the ad.
There would be no issues ... | 3 | 7.666667 | |
1402394560 | 1402412283 | t3_27rvvd | t5_2to41 | 38 | poopytabletthrowaway: Well come clean the tablet up an dry it out and the vid will be all yours!
Captain__Caveman: Just plug it in on ur computer
poopytabletthrowaway: Will it transfer if tablet wont turn on?
Captain__Caveman: i dont know maybe ?
poopytabletthrowaway: Theres something in the hole O_O
cumberland_farms: ... | 7 | 5.428571 | |
1402389314 | 1402500750 | t3_27rsx9 | t5_2to41 | 9 | rejectionmonarch666: TIFU By attempting to seduce my recently former boyfriend.
Disclaimer: I'm posting this from my shitty phone that won't permit paragraphs. TIFU. It's been about three weeks since the person I'm head over heels in love with broke up with me. His reasoning for the seperation wasn't terrible, but I wo... | 6 | 1.5 | |
1402400368 | 1402429643 | t3_27s1fz | t5_2to41 | 160 | NotMe6022: TIFU by sneezing in a woman's face and knocking over her children
Throwaway because it wasn't my best day. I was out with family at the local zoo and having a great time. We were in this 'local farm' section that teaches you about milking cows and such and my (baby) sister was playing with a fake cow on di... | 4 | 40 | |
1402378774 | 1402407767 | t3_27rjnt | t5_2to41 | 14 | dubai_dan: TIFU - by falling into a pond (located INSIDE a tower)
This fuck up happened technically over a year ago, but something reminded me of it the other day, so I thought I'd share.
Firstly, I pride myself on always being pruned immaculately at work, I invested in a lovely suit that I wear for all my important m... | 3 | 4.666667 | |
1402404116 | 1402431039 | t3_27s563 | t5_2to41 | 55 | [deleted]: TIFU by wiping my ass with poison ivy
Backstory: I'm a camp counselor at a summer camp. So every week we have a bonfire for the kids in the woods away from the bunks. So we we're heading to the bonfire, when all of a sudden I needed to take a shit. So I give my kids to another counselor and head into the woo... | 6 | 9.166667 | |
1402415899 | 1402442646 | t3_27sbaz | t5_2to41 | 100 | Tiff7856: I was just commenting on how nice it was to be relaxing after a hard day, the pic was meant to just show the bath wi my legs, the same you would see if I was in a pool..so I wasn't thinking it would be inappropriate I guess that's the point I wasn't thinking. I learned my lesson, I have already talked to two ... | 20 | 5 | |
1402415949 | 1402442218 | t3_27smaw | t5_2to41 | 20 | zubaba: TIFU: Accidentally hit boss with a pencil.
I had to come into work alone this weekend to finish a project. I work in an office with high ceilings, and I was getting a little loopy from too much computer time, so for whatever reason that made total sense at the time, I decided to try to stick a pencil in the roo... | 10 | 2 | |
1402416661 | 1402420107 | t3_27sni6 | t5_2to41 | 11 | durkal: TIFU by dropping my phone into my own cum
My morning ritual is to get up very early and masturbate in the shower. I don't turn the shower on until after I'm finished. I just kneel down and jerk off onto the shower floor. I do this, because it's easy to clean up.
So, this morning, after I finished jerking off t... | 5 | 2.2 | |
1402418541 | 1402435284 | t3_27sqn8 | t5_2to41 | 37 | treeless_ent: Tifu by parking my car
So I just moved to a new part of town. New landlord failed to mention the weekly street cleaning. Both my gf and I awoke to find our cars gone. Gonna be $400 to get our cars back. Funny thing is we just moved and it cost us everything we had. So no cars for us for two weeks until we... | 6 | 6.166667 | |
1402421055 | 1402463637 | t3_27sveg | t5_2to41 | 8 | superduckquack: TIFU by posting a comment on reddit detailing a past experience of how my older sister found me masturbating to my dad's hidden porn tapes - can't sleep now
Alright so I originally posted a comment in response to another thread titled ["TIFU by coming home too early"](http://www.reddit.com/r/tifu/commen... | 6 | 1.333333 | |
1402421932 | 1402439122 | t3_27swze | t5_2to41 | 11 | [deleted]: TIFU by crossing a "side chick" line
I occasionally fuck this guy, who these days is in an open relationship...but one where they don't talk about who else they sleep with. Last night he was talking about these crazy elaborate murder mystery parties he and his friends do and it sounded really fun. Without th... | 3 | 3.666667 | |
1402422785 | 1402427578 | t3_27syi7 | t5_2to41 | 11 | Always-Stoned: [NSFW] TIFU by eating out.
liberty71: She clean it up and blow you as an apology?
Cherpyderp: Good question. OP, comment?
| 3 | 3.666667 | |
1402422781 | 1402435282 | t3_27syhx | t5_2to41 | 6 | IntolerableFreedom: TIFU by cutting Scotch Bonnet peppers after doing some topiary
Me and the girlfriend went to the market and got some fresh fruit and veg. After we get back I decide to have a little trim down below before having a shower. As it was my turn to make dinner I get dressed and go to the kitchen. After cu... | 3 | 2 | |
1402419500 | 1402497282 | t3_27ssg3 | t5_2to41 | 18 | ElCynico: TIFU by leaving my gym bag in my car.
This happened yesterday, and it could have also been a TIL thread if I thought of taking a picture of it at the moment of the fuck up.
Anyways, the hot summer days are upon us meaning that my car is reaching near hell-like temperatures by the time I get off work. Normal... | 3 | 6 | |
1402428264 | 1402759943 | t3_27t8f4 | t5_2to41 | 57 | ILikeBabyBatterNow: TIFU by conditioning myself to last longer during sex for a long time, but accidentally made me gay instead. (NSFW)
Alright guys, *technically* this isn't a usual TIFU, on account of I'd been creating and moulding the fuck up for quite some time, but I'll start from the beginning. Throwaway is obvio... | 4 | 14.25 | |
1402427566 | 1402432118 | t3_27t74b | t5_2to41 | 10 | juksayer: TIFU by forgetting to tell my boss he had an appointment today. I'll probably be fired when he finds out.
So last week I had scheduled a big job for our irrigation company, ~2,000 USD. I had set the appointment for today, however, I forgot to make a work order or even tell anybody about it. So today the custo... | 4 | 2.5 | |
1402429738 | 1402445286 | t3_27tb53 | t5_2to41 | 33 | [deleted]: TIFU by accidentally turning on my phone's flashlight while a soldier was talking to my class
So there I was cleaning my phone case a bit in the classroom. Suddenly some guy in a U.S. soldier uniform walks in. He starts explaining how the rest of my High School years will be difficult. I'm fairl... | 7 | 4.714286 | |
1402427958 | 1402559108 | t3_27t7va | t5_2to41 | 29 | Kitty-Bibliophile: TIFU by missing my first exam at university
Fuck up that did actually occur today! Studied myself stupid for weeks and ended up thinking my exam was tomorrow and confusing the dates. I missed it, received an email from my lecturer and now I get to apply for deference, which I may or may not get, or f... | 5 | 5.8 | |
1402431381 | 1402512823 | t3_27tea3 | t5_2to41 | 50 | [deleted]: Tifu by walking my girlfriend to the door
Very rarely does my girlfriend leave for work before me, but yesterday was a little different. We recently moved out of our apartment and in with her mom to save money. Her mom has a fancy new security system with hidden cameras around the house and key codes for the... | 5 | 10 | |
1402431107 | 1402454684 | t3_27tdqa | t5_2to41 | 451 | facehurtfarter: TIFU, farted and broke my face.
I was heading to my kitchen today to feed the cats, when I passed through the living room. My boyfriend had fallen asleep sitting up while watching TV, and I saw a golden opportunity. I had to fart, and it was time to get him back for all those times he farted in bed and ... | 11 | 41 | |
1402432015 | 1402830846 | t3_27tfe0 | t5_2to41 | 67 | Afferent_Input: TIFU by suggesting that my wife "might be a little bit PMSish"
I don’t think she is much different than your average red-blooded American woman with a full-time job and two little kids. Normally my wife is fun, chipper, and reasonable, but every four weeks Mrs. Hyde comes out to play. She loses her cool... | 9 | 7.444444 | |
1402428879 | 1402449608 | t3_27t9ke | t5_2to41 | 12 | weesstt: TIFU by leaving my blanket outside.
So, I went to bed last night with the intention of doing laundry once I woke up. Well, when I woke up I didn't have the energy to get out of bed so I ended up falling asleep again. Fast forward an hour and I'm on my way out the door because I'm going to be late for school. B... | 3 | 4 | |
1402432380 | 1402447678 | t3_27tg2s | t5_2to41 | 14 | [deleted]: TIFU by ordering from TigerDirect
I've been piecing together a PC from Amazon, NewEgg, EBay, Microcenter, and wherever I could find good deals on parts.
I ordered a solid state hard drive for it. It was on sale at TigerDirect. I put in all of my information, but then I had to log in with an account to use ... | 4 | 3.5 | |
1402431383 | 1402852374 | t3_27tea7 | t5_2to41 | 34 | 2pacoclock: TIFU by talking to a crazy old woman for over 3 hours
So I was walking outside and I was really tired so I decided to sit down on a bench.
2 minutes later an older woman using a walker says "move to the corner, I want to sit there". So I moved to the corner. This woman was 5' feet tall, 300 pounds, hunch... | 4 | 8.5 | |
1402437873 | 1402522386 | t3_27tpfp | t5_2to41 | 18 | detroitbrothers: TIFU by offering a woman a job.
Long story short, I own a small convenience store in Detroit. Nearly every Monday or Tuesday, an African American woman stops in and buys some of the basic essentials like milk, bread, ect with her government assistance. Over the years I got to know her and found out sh... | 8 | 2.25 | |
1402438338 | 1402446345 | t3_27tq6v | t5_2to41 | 21 | lifeintechnicoulor: TIFU by telling a girl that she had a spider on her leg.
Well, not today exactly, happened about a year ago.
This whole thing all happened on what was a fairly unassuming bus ride to school. There were about three other people people on the bus that day, as it was a fairly small minibus, so we all... | 4 | 5.25 | |
1402440012 | 1402441368 | t3_27tsx3 | t5_2to41 | 10 | [deleted]: TIFU By urinating myself in public.
Was at a shopping centre with my mum, helping her carry bags of shopping around as she spends her birthday money. I need to go to the toilet so she says she will wait outside for me. I walk into the men's room and head straight for a urinal, i do the usual routine - Look a... | 5 | 2 | |
1402441595 | 1402478007 | t3_27tvdm | t5_2to41 | 20 | SWAGGYSWAGSON: TIFU by sending nudes of Kate Upton to my friend's Dad.
So, throwaway because you fucking know. Anyway, me, being the fucking genius I am, made a group text and accidentally added my friend's dad's phone number. Of course being the horny bastard I am I just had to send some pictures Kate Upton and Katrin... | 3 | 6.666667 | |
1402430358 | 1402502135 | t3_27tca2 | t5_2to41 | 8 | [deleted]: TIFU by reassembling my keyboard wrong.
This is an extremely minor fuck up.
It's a fact that keyboards are gross. So every so often, I clean mine out. This time, however, I fucked up and reassembled the top row not as qwertyuiop but rather as qwertyioup. So now I can't fix it unless I take out the entire bo... | 5 | 1.6 | |
1402442019 | 1402517634 | t3_27tw1e | t5_2to41 | 62 | frawsif: TIFU by not clearing my browsing history [NSFW]
So I've been working quite a ways from home for the past while, and like any man working away, I had the urge.
After a long shift, I finally got back to the hotel and decided to help myself relax. I pulled out my tablet and the most glorious fap session ensued. ... | 6 | 10.333333 | |
1402442733 | 1402443131 | t3_27tx6k | t5_2to41 | 7 | [deleted]: TIFU by burning my vagina.
So I'm changing my tampon and open the cabinet to get a new one.. All out, no big deal I have some in the car. I go out to my black car on the way to the gym, it's 110 degrees outside... Start driving, oh! Forgot to put a tampon in, pop the tampon in, burning hot sensation hits my... | 3 | 2.333333 | |
1402443841 | 1402502530 | t3_27tywc | t5_2to41 | 171 | Not_An_Expert_: TIFU by vomiting on a girl giving me a bj.
This happened a couple months ago with this girl I met trough an online dating site. We met up for a date and it went really well, so well in fact that she invited me over for "coffee." It was like it was in the TV shows, I was so excited she said coffee and no... | 5 | 34.2 | |
1402445154 | 1402448413 | t3_27u0w3 | t5_2to41 | 15 | Mrdrunkenbatman: TIFU by being logical
I will keep this simple, not a serious girlfriend just a girl. - is me.
HER. Does my arse look big in this?
ME. compared to what?
HER. WHAT?
ME. other stuff you wear your favourite jeans make your arse look a bit rounder
Her......silence
Me. And when you aren't wearing anything ... | 3 | 5 | |
1402441612 | 1402488248 | t3_27tveo | t5_2to41 | 31 | [deleted]: TIFU by making a joke about dead babies to a co-worker whose baby died.
We were talking about new parents and the difference between them and someone who has a couple of kids. How with your first you worry about anything and everything where as by the third kid you don't want to know about it unless there is... | 4 | 7.75 | |
1402446493 | 1402454207 | t3_27u2xp | t5_2to41 | 29 | Format_Nazi: TIFU by accidentally going to Pornhub instead of Paypal
You know that little thing on Google Chrome where you can start the beginning letters of a website and you can easily press enter to go to that site? Well last night I went to pornhub to look at some tits and shit. This morning at an office meeting I ... | 3 | 9.666667 | |
1402446233 | 1402517057 | t3_27u2jw | t5_2to41 | 15 | benchris17: TIFU by making hot chocolate.
This happened last week, but I've been crazy busy so didn't post.
My first ever job is at a very-well known coffee shop branch in the UK.
I started a couple months back, just picking up trays and wiping tables, with the drinks being made by the baristas rather than myself, ... | 5 | 3 | |
1402448881 | 1402518239 | t3_27u6fz | t5_2to41 | 5,650 | wanderingmuppet: TIFU by having an orgasm at the nail salon.
Today, my gf and I went to go get our nails done together (as good lesbians do). I was really excited for the massage chairs, and unbeknownst to be, they were a little more intense then the ones I am used to. When I sat down, the woman to the left of me comme... | 14 | 403.571429 | |
1402449001 | 1402465667 | t3_27u6n3 | t5_2to41 | 3 | I_fucked_up_bigtyme: TIFU by sending a text that asked a possible roommate if he had sex with animals...... fucking auttocorrect
Looking for roommate and sent a text asking if he ever does drugs or drinks a lot, just curious or gets into fights. It sent "ever thought of doing an animal? Just curious is all. Apparently ... | 4 | 0.75 | |
1402453038 | 1402539835 | t3_27ucjl | t5_2to41 | 126 | ramrodtonight: TIFU By Letting My Fiance See Pictures of my Ex. Yeah That Kind of Picture.
First of all I very much regret to say that I can't share the pictures. If she ever murders someone or becomes famous I promise I will share them by way of TMZ or that enterprising fellow that first dreamt up the excellent title ... | 9 | 14 | |
1402455027 | 1402471567 | t3_27ufk5 | t5_2to41 | 27 | Jamarcus911: TIFU By Trying to get Healthier
First off this happened yesterday but certain key parts happened today which help make this story seem whole. And fuck throwaways...
It all started in December of 2013, I had decided to start working out in order to feel good, look good and not be a Jubba the Hutt cosplayer... | 6 | 4.5 | |
1402453434 | 1402471904 | t3_27ud71 | t5_2to41 | 17 | [deleted]: TIFU By attending too much college...
I took classes at Sierra College while I worked at a local company for about five years so I could save up for college right out of high school.
Then my savings gradually disappeared into the family business. I'm sure I'll get it back eventually... but that's a separate... | 4 | 4.25 | |
1402454126 | 1402460998 | t3_27ue8v | t5_2to41 | 6 | lumdumpling: TIFU by locking my car keys in a house that I showed this evening.
I was going through my routine of locking up the house as the potential buyers had already left.
My mind must have definitely been elsewhere because it wasn't until I had shut the front door, locked it, and placed the key securely in the ... | 3 | 2 | |
1402456796 | 1402510367 | t3_27ui0c | t5_2to41 | 26 | itsmewallis: TIFU by not making my Tumblr likes private
So today I got a message on skype from the quiet girl from my school. We are kind of friends, but rarely talk. She follows me on Tumblr and I follow her back. (Thats how we became friends actually)
In the message she said that I should make my likes private and ... | 9 | 2.888889 | |
1402458798 | 1402459021 | t3_27ujyf | t5_2to41 | 3 | Lugiafanatic: So...do you live with him? If so, how could you not talk with him?
Going_to_Cali: Well I looks like it happened in the last 15 minutes so they probably just haven't crossed paths yet.
Lugiafanatic: Yeah....
At any rate, OP, you're going to have to confront this eventually...why not just try talking to h... | 3 | 1 | |
1402451196 | 1402493721 | t3_27u9w3 | t5_2to41 | 62 | Moghlannak: [NSFW] TIFU by fainting in front of a bunch of friends, with my nut sack hanging out.....
So I had like 6 or 7 friends over for beers/BBQ/joints etc. last weekend. Everything was going good, just hanging out shooting the shit, regular dude stuff. We had some beer delivered and when the guy got to my place I... | 5 | 12.4 | |
1402458430 | 1402502741 | t3_27ukby | t5_2to41 | 33 | Rhurt: TIFU by watching police videos in the toilet at work
Like any good lunch break, I was sitting taking a long poo and watching videos on my phone. I never really have a game plan of what I'm going to watch I just ad lib it as I go. Today I somehow came to the topic of police videos, specifically , police brutality... | 6 | 5.5 | |
1402459916 | 1402461075 | t3_27umbf | t5_2to41 | 14 | WritingIsforme: TIFU by overreacting
So, I had dealt with racial people before, (I am Asian.) Now, this was nothing like I had before. It was today at school, and one of my friends comes up to me with a new kid, the kid was small and weak. I kindly said 'Hello' And he responded like this...
'Do you need glasses because... | 5 | 2.8 | |
1402455092 | 1402487259 | t3_27ufni | t5_2to41 | 51 | Unicornsfordinner: TIFU by asking my friend how her parents were doing.
My best friend had asked me out for coffee recently and I happily obliged. I hadn't seen her in a couple if weeks so I met her at the cafe we usually go to. She sat down with her drink and we talked about the usual. She's dating my SO's cousin so w... | 7 | 7.285714 | |
1402460038 | 1402532862 | t3_27umh4 | t5_2to41 | 74 | HwrdStrk: TIFU and lost the girl of my dreams.
Hey guys.
Let me start by saying this didn't happen today. This happened close to a week ago. I have this co-worker. For all intents and purposes, we will call her Hawk. I have been working with Hawk for close to three years, and will be working with her for just one more... | 7 | 10.571429 | |
1402454292 | 1402501025 | t3_27uehx | t5_2to41 | 21 | [deleted]: TIFU, Got knocked out.
During this time of year, the only students that stay at their flats rather than going home are the ones that have to resit exams. This year there was quite a few of us in my building so one of my neighbours decides to throw a party. The party's pretty hectic and everyone's drunk, I do... | 4 | 5.25 | |
1402460897 | 1402511945 | t3_27unl9 | t5_2to41 | 154 | FightFireBitch: TIFU by humping my dog's water bowl
I was working outside today, spraying roundup down my fence line. After a little while I needed to pee. I stepped into the woods to take a leak which is a fairly common decision for me. After I had finished and zipped up, I realized that I had just handled my junk wit... | 5 | 30.8 | |
1402461081 | 1402477761 | t3_27untd | t5_2to41 | 23 | neverthesame2: TIFU five years ago by eating a nuclear-strength edible pot brownie
Disclaimer: This is not a "drugs are bad, mkay?" / anti-pot post. I used to smoke/rip quantity of the stickiest nugs and enjoyed it immensely for years, until the day I managed to f*ck my head up for good.
You are no doubt skeptical. ... | 3 | 7.666667 | |
1402474803 | 1402515524 | t3_27v19q | t5_2to41 | 91 | [deleted]: TIFU by masturbating before work
I started out my morning rather normal, except today I decided to get a good start.
I reached for my vibrator and did my thing, I lost track of time and I literally had five minutes before I had to be at work.
I grabbed a bra and bolted out the door.
I arrived home later in... | 5 | 18.2 | |
1402472287 | 1402476940 | t3_27uzai | t5_2to41 | 4 | Hamza78ch11: TIFU by trying to have a midnight snack
This was actually a couple years back when I was a chubby teenager. My mom tried to get me to be healthy and as such I was put on diet and exercise. I hated every second of it. After a few days I couldn't put up with it anymore I needed to drown myself in unhealthy, ... | 3 | 1.333333 | |
1402476106 | 1402618310 | t3_27v27h | t5_2to41 | 206 | [deleted]: [NSFW] TIFU by vomiting on my new fiance's lap during a BJ
This happened late last night. Last weekend my partner and I got engaged.
Yesterday I tell him I have a surprise for him later, so we're in bed and I do a little strip tease in cute underwear and go down on him, we're getting right into the moment, ... | 13 | 15.846154 | |
1402477451 | 1402486993 | t3_27v37b | t5_2to41 | 76 | EL_SALMONO: TIFU by watching pregnancy porn in class
(GAME OF THRONES SPOILERS AHEAD)
I had completed my coursework and needed to wait for it to be graded but the teacher it was for wouldn't be in for another 2 hours, so I decided to catch up on some game of thrones seeing as only me and my pal were on that side of t... | 6 | 12.666667 | |
1402479395 | 1402556074 | t3_27v4mh | t5_2to41 | 11 | sexyontheoutside: TIFU when my phone freaked out on snapchat
TIFU by nearly ruining a friendship whilst simultaneously almost scarring his younger sister.
So my phone has been having lots of random problems the last couple of months and recently the screen has sometimes not been touch sensitive. My friend and I have a... | 3 | 3.666667 | |
1402484495 | 1402555573 | t3_27v8jc | t5_2to41 | 80 | Gunfuni: TIFU By yelling I will skullfuck your brain in a mickey mouse voice
I was sitting in my room playing a video game called Rust attacking some asshats who raided my friends base while I was using my Mickey Mouse voice to strike fear into them or something. But as a spur of the moment I yelled out "I WILL SKULLFU... | 5 | 16 | |
1402488964 | 1402492481 | t3_27vcpk | t5_2to41 | 66 | [deleted]: TIFU by having a wet dream in a dorm room with 8 girls.
My friends and me talked recently about having wet dreams. I told them that I've had NEVER a wet dream. I guess because I have sex or masturbate regularly. The idea of waking up with jizz in my pants was just weird, so I mocked them. A couple of weeks l... | 4 | 16.5 | |
1402492422 | 1402494142 | t3_27vgka | t5_2to41 | 20 | [deleted]: TIFU by calling my sister a racist after she said something racist.
I gave my sister a ride home from her work. My mum had been at the shops, so I picked her up too.
We stopped off at a supermarket on the way back, where I had a really irritating guy refuse to let me leave because he thought my signature on... | 3 | 6.666667 | |
1402494062 | 1402545219 | t3_27vio3 | t5_2to41 | 820 | DownFallSyndrome: TIFU by taking a shower with my sister's friend.
So last week my sister's friend (we will call her P) told me she had feelings for me and wanted to do certain things with me. P was rather tipsy and it was 2 in the morning. So I took it as her joking around (also I was sort of buzzed myself)
Last nigh... | 24 | 34.166667 | |
1402454419 | 1402521748 | t3_27ueon | t5_2to41 | 3 | [deleted]: TIFU by writing down the wrong address on my penny board's shipping information..
this is my first penny board ever and i was so excited that i accidentally put down "1235" in the address where it should have been 1225.. it's the apartment block right next to ours, but i do hope they're kind souls who'd be r... | 3 | 1 | |
1402492268 | 1402498902 | t3_27vgd8 | t5_2to41 | 3 | iDontLifeSoGood: TIFU by taking modafinil before an exam.
FearLeadsToAnger: [Finally, an opportunity](http://amandaterasu.files.wordpress.com/2014/06/wall-slice-downvote.gif)
gfy_bot: GFY link: [gfycat.com/AcrobaticSlushyBumblebee](http://gfycat.com/AcrobaticSlushyBumblebee)
---
^(GIF size: 6.62 MiB) ^| ^(GFY size:8... | 4 | 0.75 | |
1402495170 | 1402500466 | t3_27vk5c | t5_2to41 | 10 | popgoesthe_weasel: TIFU by waking my girlfriend up before work.
Batroc_Z_Leaper: Get her a coupon to the nail salon and all will be forgiven.
popgoesthe_weasel: Or I could just go get McDonald's
Batroc_Z_Leaper: Almost as good as an orgasm - if you're dead inside.
| 4 | 2.5 | |
1402493282 | 1402582950 | t3_27vhof | t5_2to41 | 240 | [deleted]: TIFU by getting a boner in class. NSFWish
So it's the end of the academic year and we had a project to present, the project was meant to be over the course of 7 months. The planning and design should have covered me for the presentation, I had a script wrote with a few titles on a projector, however I tend t... | 7 | 34.285714 | |
1402503110 | 1402507681 | t3_27vwlp | t5_2to41 | 11 | Dinosoarman: Tifu by telling a friend's girlfriend she has no tits.
JeremySquirrel: 1. Post pic's of her to /r/tinytits;
2. Get upvotes;
3. Everybody = happy.
4. You're welcome.
Dinosoarman: I havent even seen the front side of her. :c
Voyager5555: wait, what?
Dinosoarman: I said it into her ear from behind.
Voyage... | 7 | 1.571429 | |
1402502726 | 1402504917 | t3_27vw10 | t5_2to41 | 20 | [deleted]: TIFU My neighbor's mom gave me oral sex and I'm afraid that he'll shoot me
Going into my junior year of high school, I started carpooling with my neighbor who was an asian kid two years younger than me. His mom was generous enough to drive me to and from school every day since my mom had to work. He was a st... | 3 | 6.666667 | |
1402505748 | 1402523814 | t3_27w107 | t5_2to41 | 16 | safeforworkreddit: TIFU by leaving my car doors unlocked.
I have had stuff stolen out of my car before so I learned not to leave anything of major value in there because I rather have the thief see there's is nothing in my car then deal with a broken window.
During my weekend (Monday and Tuesday) me and a co-worker de... | 6 | 2.666667 | |
1402506730 | 1402508977 | t3_27w2m8 | t5_2to41 | 15 | SpookyCakes: Tifu by being an hour late for work due to my alarm clock
I fell asleep around 9 pm last night and my alarm didn't waken me from my slumber. I was suppose to be at work around 7:30am and woke up around 8:20am. My boss told me not to come in, and now I have to work a double tomorrow. Any advice? How should... | 4 | 3.75 | |
1402507090 | 1402509121 | t3_27w373 | t5_2to41 | 23 | [deleted]: TIFU having sex on campus
I met a beautiful girl on tinder. Absolutely stunning. Redhead, great butt, and a freshman at University of Washington. We had coffee, listened to my beats in the park, then I was off to work. I came back at about 11 and met her in red square. We went to a large field and got down t... | 6 | 3.833333 | |
1402503135 | 1402522483 | t3_27vwn6 | t5_2to41 | 16 | mangoagogoa: TIFU by betting on my golf skills
I play in an ongoing weekly golf tournament with my company. Today I had the pleasure of playing with one of the owners, notorious for making wagers and penalizing the loser with shots of whiskey. Being the only female who plays, I do my best to keep up with all male pack.... | 4 | 4 | |
1402508991 | 1402547194 | t3_27w6gs | t5_2to41 | 12 | afkoshlia: TIFU by spilling chemicals on my crotch
I am in a chemistry class and as part of the assignment we were doing today we were handling chemicals. Low level acids and flammable materials.
I managed to spill a low level acid on my crotch. While it didn't necessarily reach my dick, I did real a severe burning on... | 3 | 4 | |
1402507440 | 1402509949 | t3_27w3rr | t5_2to41 | 6 | [deleted]: TIFU by claiming insurance based on a nonexistent business
Didn't fuck up today, but realized it today.
Some backstory: I started my own business in September, and it involves *lots* of mailing orders out to customers. To get a discount for postage, you can apply for something called a VentureOne card in Ca... | 5 | 1.2 | |
1402510447 | 1402550805 | t3_27w90d | t5_2to41 | 3,555 | throwaway75638: TIFU by not hiding the key to our bedroom (NSFW)
yugats: His erection likely had nothing to do with what you were doing. Boys that age often get an erection and don't know what to do with it. When he touches it, it feels weird, so he keeps messing with it. It's nothing sexual. That is probably why he c... | 13 | 273.461538 | |
1402511106 | 1402577915 | t3_27wa6f | t5_2to41 | 839 | gustle: TIFU by mistaking someone for my girlfriend.
This happened earlier today and is pretty much the most embarrassing thing that has happened to me in years. To set the scene, it is early in the morning and my girlfriend and I decide we want to go get a cup of coffee from Einstein Bagels because we are poor right n... | 10 | 83.9 | |
1402511115 | 1402526321 | t3_27wa6u | t5_2to41 | 31 | ohgeorgee: TIFU by busting my gf's grandparents' toiletseat cover with the power of love.
Through complicated circumstances we were the only ones left in the house. I convinced her to have sex even though she had her doubts. The toilet seat cover didn't agree with my idea. Still waiting for the grandparents to come bac... | 3 | 10.333333 |
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