start_date stringlengths 10 10 | end_date stringlengths 10 10 | thread_id stringlengths 8 10 ⌀ | subreddit stringclasses 1
value | subreddit_id stringclasses 1
value | total_score int64 -564 194k | text stringlengths 52 58.9k | num_messages int64 3 160 | avg_score float64 -55.17 14.3k |
|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|
1403234516 | 1403239467 | t3_28m1c3 | t5_2to41 | 9 | ftt34: TIFU by being a history major
As a young college freshmen I thought I would go to law school after so I planned on majoring in something that was fun and interested me leading me to choose history. But when I finished my junior year I realized I had no desire to go through with the law school route and by that p... | 3 | 3 | |
1403235021 | 1404097983 | t3_28m214 | t5_2to41 | 6 | minhtan_93: TIFU by picking up a girl at the airport
Wall of text. Sorry guys. Lots on my mind.
This happened monday actually. Over the weekend, I visited my friend in Chicago, let's call her Tammy. Tammy is going to grad school there, and is staying with another girl room mate, let's call her Jessie. I arrived in Ch... | 3 | 2 | |
1403232636 | 1403237593 | t3_28lyo6 | t5_2to41 | 9 | Ask_Me_If_Im_A_Horse: TIFU by being an overprotective, jealous friend who jumped to conclusions
So I've been talking to this girl. To get it out of the way, it was long distance. She's amazing. Great personality, looks, the whole 9 yards. We've been talking for about a month now and things are getting serious in my min... | 5 | 1.8 | |
1403229013 | 1403245343 | t3_28ltia | t5_2to41 | 27 | Rodnelau: TIFU by showing my whole summer camp porn.
This happened a few years ago, actualy. But i've just found this subreddit and decited it was appropriate.
I was about 14, hormones flowing, and masturbation at it's peak. My mother insisted that I should go to a summer camp, and so I chose the funnest looking one,... | 4 | 6.75 | |
1403221832 | 1403371057 | t3_28lj0t | t5_2to41 | 7 | tacocat-lesbian: TIFU by drunk texting my potential employer
I know someone who works in environmental conservationism who told me she could probably give me a job for the summer at her company. We've been communicating back and forth for a few days now.
Last night, my friends and I got pretty drunk and decided to st... | 3 | 2.333333 | |
1403274496 | 1403282951 | t3_28m0bz | t5_2to41 | 8 | [deleted]: The Buckin' Bronco!!
i_go_to_uri: I thought that was when you do surprise anal and she squirms to pull away, you just stand your ground and hold on?
[deleted]: Actually never heard of that one. Name fits that too. I like it.
i_go_to_uri: Aw shit what have I done
| 4 | 2 | |
1403241715 | 1403243022 | t3_28maf9 | t5_2to41 | 9 | Seaman0: TIFU by stealing condoms
So I have been dating this girl for little over a year and having sex causally for half a year. So this morning she texts me telling me she'll be home alone tonight and that she's extremely horny. We had been all out of condoms for a week and so I decided to go get some. As I got into ... | 3 | 3 | |
1403241803 | 1403272446 | t3_28maik | t5_2to41 | 18 | [deleted]: TIFU by not locking my phone (w/pics)
No need for a throwaway
This happened today, enjoy
So me and my friend have been exchanging texts about trimming hair on the nether regions , you know; normal stuff.
He mentioned Nair which I've never used before, he start's by showing me prank videos on Youtube inv... | 5 | 3.6 | |
1403241518 | 1403294596 | t3_28ma7l | t5_2to41 | 26 | datfilthycasual: TIFU by name dropping an abusive coworker to an angry patient's family
So we have this raging cunt of a coworker at my hospital. Has past charges of patient abuse, but thanks to the bullshit union, she still works at the same place. She has been repeatedly verbally abusing a needy patient. No one repor... | 8 | 3.25 | |
1403241976 | 1403286318 | t3_28mapu | t5_2to41 | 10 | Throwthisoutn0w: TIFU by forgetting to turn off wifi at work
I rarely use the free wifi at work but I decided I may as well save some data while browsing sfw apps and such. Had to agree to the usage policy of course and intentionally used the wifi for a bit. Eventually forgot I was connected, and remembered I had some ... | 4 | 2.5 | |
1403243403 | 1403266492 | t3_28mc8r | t5_2to41 | 13 | [deleted]: TIFU i can't bust one with my new girl..
so tonight i pretty much fucked the dog shit out of this girl i've been off and on with for five years. she's hot. really hot. perfect ass and down for anything. but for some reason i just cant finish the job. ive got the stamina of a fucking race horse so she ends up... | 4 | 3.25 | |
1403245947 | 1403247828 | t3_28mewd | t5_2to41 | 25 | Tifuaway: Tifu by buying a butt plug on Amazon.
So as it says I bought a butt plug on Amazon because I can... but I'm a makle who is engaged to a girl and has a kid on the way as well. But I have always been a bi curious guy. But I bought it of Amazon on my main account thinking I could delete it from my purchase hist... | 5 | 5 | |
1403246327 | 1403321463 | t3_28mf9c | t5_2to41 | 19 | [deleted]: TIFU Update!: TIFU by telling my boyfriend I talked with my ex
[ TIFU by telling my boyfriend I talked with my ex](http://www.reddit.com/r/tifu/comments/28jh8x/tifu_by_telling_my_boyfriend_i_talked_with_my_ex/)
First of all, I wanna thank EVERYBODY your taking the time to give me your personal observation a... | 5 | 3.8 | |
1403253714 | 1403369064 | t3_28mlm2 | t5_2to41 | 115 | blackmysteria: TIFU by burning my clit with a cigarette
So it happended about 5 minutes ago and i am in so much pain.
bassically, one of my favourite things to do is have a cigarette while on the toilet, people think in the shower, i think on the toilet.
Anyway, i lit up my ciggie, turned the fan on and commenced my... | 14 | 8.214286 | |
1403255599 | 1403257889 | t3_28mmy2 | t5_2to41 | 36 | MarinaAquamarina: TIFU by getting slaughtered at a work do
I work at a university. Last night there was a civic reception for the community. Free wine. Loads and loads of free wine. I know the catering staff as I work in events and use them all the time, so they kept me totally topped up. By half 7 I was blackout drunk... | 3 | 12 | |
1403262203 | 1403304283 | t3_28mrwi | t5_2to41 | 444 | wotwotinthebutts: TIFU by finally seeing my boyfriends butthole.
Not so much a fuck up - this is probably a good, albeit icky discovery to make, but my boyfriend and I learned a maybe concerning thing about his butthole area today.
So I've been trying to see my boyfriends butthole for years and today I succeeded. ... | 8 | 55.5 | |
1403261678 | 1403282316 | t3_28mrhb | t5_2to41 | 11 | Classy_Young_Lady: **TIFU** by procuring "murderers" a lock of my hair
This started a few hours ago. It's late, I'm visiting my grandparents, and watching Law & Order. I like to think of myself as not easily frightened sort of girl. HA! So not the case...
It's nearly 1:30 and here I am in my little bl... | 4 | 2.75 | |
1403265586 | 1403299846 | t3_28muts | t5_2to41 | 28 | MAGNyco: TIFU: By letting a construction worker borrow my toilet.
So it all started when i was sitting in my home after school browsing reddit, the doorbell rings and i go to get it. Its one of the construction workers that are working on my families new garage. He asks if he could borrow my toliet and i let him since ... | 3 | 9.333333 | |
1403266642 | 1403300516 | t3_28mvv6 | t5_2to41 | 43 | a_cool_username_: Tifu by bleeding on my wife
Here we were laying on the couch partaking in a baby making session. I feel this wet stuff on my face but whatever, I keep going. It wasn't until after I finished that I realized my nose was bleeding. She wasn't very happy considering her hair was full of blood and I coul... | 4 | 10.75 | |
1403267457 | 1403297857 | t3_28mwn2 | t5_2to41 | 79 | thismightbemymain: TIFU by accidentally inhaling chlorine gas
I was about to make myself a chocolate milkshake and went to dig out the old blender. When I found it it was covered inside with mould and other undesirable substances.
I decided to give this blender the best goddamn wash it's ever had. I sprayed the entire... | 9 | 8.777778 | |
1403271846 | 1403292627 | t3_28n253 | t5_2to41 | 20 | [deleted]: TIFU by having sex 5 days in a row while on my period
This wasn't today but over a span of about a week. I'll start off by giving some information about my SO; he's the horniest guy I've ever met and basically needs to have sex every day. I normally don't have a problem with this but last week I was visited ... | 3 | 6.666667 | |
1403269474 | 1403369193 | t3_28myy3 | t5_2to41 | 31 | skingfuturama: TIFU by thinking it was a fart
[deleted]: Never trust a fart, never waste a hardon, never pass a lavatory
oaktreedude: ...waste a hard on? Do you mean that most guys can't get an erection at fucking will?
[deleted]: Not when you're finished middle school we can't no
oaktreedude: oh please. if you're hav... | 10 | 3.1 | |
1403271760 | 1403344117 | t3_28n20d | t5_2to41 | 696 | fuckup__throwaway: TIFU by exposing myself to a group of prepubescent children
I volunteer coaching swimming lessons and lifesaving to a bunch of school kids, mostly aged 10-11.
I don't know how many of you have worked with kids, but they can be a pain in the ass, because when one of them acts like a smartass, it usua... | 6 | 116 | |
1403273583 | 1403345854 | t3_28n4lm | t5_2to41 | 232 | redwingsNOTHOCKEY: TIFU by getting freaky in the dark
I went on a date with a girl last night, I think it was date number 3. On date number one, i was curious about her rack as she dresses very appropriately. She wears tops that are a lil looser in the front and on this first date, had a scarf on. I could not tell a... | 7 | 33.142857 | |
1403274210 | 1403283791 | t3_28n5ib | t5_2to41 | 13 | _CyPher_: TIFU by falling with my bike
Well I was cycling to work this morning and a come to a T junction, and release my right foot from my pedal (With shimano cleats, they clip your sole to the pedal) to get ready to stop as a van is approaching, realizing the van is going to slow I'm in to minds as what to do, shall... | 3 | 4.333333 | |
1403269866 | 1403304036 | t3_28mzi3 | t5_2to41 | 133 | [deleted]: TIFU: bursting a blood vessel - a masturbation story (nsfw story).
So I was masturbating in my room as I loved to do, things were going very well, it was feeling good and all that. Then it came time for me to cum and what happened next shocked me and scared me. I started to cum and it looked like there was... | 4 | 33.25 | |
1403227995 | 1403283440 | t3_28ls2a | t5_2to41 | 20 | BWSD: TIFU by trying to get to know my gay neighbor
Happened an hour ago... [M]y day was going so, so well... I just accepted a job good offer today, going to start in a few days. As I was on the phone accepting the offer, ebay app was telling me a bunch of last minute bids came in for a guitar I was selling, the price... | 3 | 6.666667 | |
1403276774 | 1403282904 | t3_28n9kt | t5_2to41 | 3 | [deleted]: TIFU by evading the police
ChokeMeiLikeIt: the cop was probably just sitting there with his buddies placing bets on how long it would take you to finally get out of the car
Jobiwankenobi: True they probably don't want to deal with "drunks" anyway
| 3 | 1 | |
1403241876 | 1403296440 | t3_28malw | t5_2to41 | 3 | igotchubsforyou: Tifu by drinking dip spit.
Sorry guys but this actually happened about a year ago but thought it belonged here. Also, bad at reddit.
I feel I should explain something first: My ex used to drink - a lot - and leave his finished bottles out on the coffee table and other nearby surfaces, but he always... | 3 | 1 | |
1403281526 | 1403283094 | t3_28nh8t | t5_2to41 | 4 | [deleted]: TIFU: Told parents to fuck off... on my birthday.
crazygiggles7: Apologize lol
crizzer74: i dont dare speak to them.
Salium123: Talk to them they will understand, your week has been shit. Its okay.
| 4 | 1 | |
1403014480 | 1403433561 | t3_28dbmu | t5_2to41 | 8 | colleen017: TIFU by swallowing my bite guard.
It's one of those very small, very *expensive* ones they custom make for you at the dentist when you have ridiculous TMJ. It was sitting on my nightstand, and when I swept my pile o' vitamins into my hand and knocked them back, there it went. I blamed the new, horse pill si... | 3 | 2.666667 | |
1403282610 | 1403301599 | t3_28nj05 | t5_2to41 | 21 | owen099: TIFU by trying to get a spider out of the pool.
It all started out as a routine day of getting into the pool. I was cleaning in before I got in, and I was skimming out the leaves and other shit in the pool.
Right as I was about to be done, I found a spider floating on the surface. This little bitch was right ... | 5 | 4.2 | |
1403283454 | 1403291226 | t3_28nk9u | t5_2to41 | 17 | [deleted]: TIFU: Had a neighbor's RV towed away
I don't know if this is a fuck-up or not. I told him on the first that his 38 year old motor home would have to go. He had gotten permission from the tenants to park there, but they were moving out, on their earlier '30 days notice' (which, due to the fuck-ups of my pro... | 5 | 3.4 | |
1403284955 | 1403491563 | t3_28nmu7 | t5_2to41 | 2,626 | [deleted]: TIFU by playing a horrible prank on my wife.
Well this actually happened yesterday and I still haven't seen her since. Yesterday I got off of work about 3 hours early and offered to pick my son up from my mother in laws for the wife. She was thrilled not to have to worry about that after work. Soon after I p... | 16 | 164.125 | |
1403287909 | 1403288765 | t3_28nrt8 | t5_2to41 | 2 | [deleted]: TIFU by over analyzing
TIFU by over analyzing why my SO doesn't want to have sex. Unsure what to think and now am freaking out.
Chwyn: It has nothing to do with you. If you're not feeling it then you're not.
crustyoreo: This.
| 3 | 0.666667 | |
1403287903 | 1403298608 | t3_28nrsz | t5_2to41 | 31 | ofmilkandhoney: TIFU by going to my boyfriend's place.
I was at a party last night with my boyfriend. We were having a great time, drinking, dancing, etc. Well as the night dwindled on, I sobered up and instead of wanting to sleep at this kind of dingy house like my SO and I had originally planned, we decided to go bac... | 4 | 7.75 | |
1403289991 | 1403419123 | t3_28nvbu | t5_2to41 | 27 | OutstandingWeirdo: TIFU by asking my crush to take a picture with me at graduation
Background story on how we met: I had a class together with this girl last year and thought she looked really unique. Not necessarily the prettiest but looks smart, mature, elegant, someone I can be comfortable around, etc. We never talk... | 8 | 3.375 | |
1403288170 | 1403323761 | t3_28ns8r | t5_2to41 | 7 | totallynot13: TIFU by drinking water
So it's the morning of a final exam, that I accidentally overslept for, (I set my alarm clock's current time to the time I wanted to wake up, and the time I wanted to wake up for my clock's current time). I managed to get to the center 15 minutes late. As I'm walking/running, I noti... | 6 | 1.166667 | |
1403313419 | 1403315021 | t3_28nwl7 | t5_2to41 | 3 | nebulast299792458: Yeah I work at the bank-- we take ripped checks all the time. No problem. We tape it up and it's totally fine.
Schen5s: Wait, so it's ok if the cheque is ripped into 2 pieces?? Or only if it is still in 1 piece but ripped into nearly 2 pieces
nebulast299792458: Yeah. Same thing if you brought in a ... | 3 | 1 | |
1403291462 | 1403297845 | t3_28nxw9 | t5_2to41 | 25 | [deleted]: TIFU REALLLY BAD, really guys, fuck.
So it all started of with a tab of acid, call me what you want I'm okay, but today I fucked up by having my sister swallow my used acid tab. So it started off great while I was taking it, then I felt I was being over whelmed after a bit so I took my tab and rolled it into... | 5 | 5 | |
1403292042 | 1403300400 | t3_28nyuq | t5_2to41 | 25 | [deleted]: TIFU by failing my final year of my degree
I passed all my modules, except for my final year project. Overall I done well, and would get a 2:2 but you have to pass the project to pass the degree - I was 5% short.
Oh well, another year of being a student...
agent_scully2084: Can you appeal the grade?
fr00j: ... | 6 | 4.166667 | |
1403289124 | 1403362150 | t3_28ntvs | t5_2to41 | 48 | keyfobpenis: TIFU in a public restroom when I tried to toss the toilet paper I just wiped my ass with into the toilet but I missed and it landed at the feet of the guy in the next stall.
I held my breath in utter terror and felt paralyzed, standing tense with my pants around my ankles. I heard nothing. He said nothing.... | 6 | 8 | |
1403290928 | 1403314524 | t3_28nwzl | t5_2to41 | 42 | Redd_hexx: TIFU by getting black out drunk...
Having a good night drinking whiskey with my SO. She has had enough and goes to pass out in the bedroom. I have more.
This part I remember. I was feeling good, and decided to have a plate of spaghetti. I turned on a Hannibal Buress special. I remember laughing and u... | 3 | 14 | |
1403291600 | 1403506955 | t3_28ny52 | t5_2to41 | 4 | disk5464: TIFU by *almost* failing two finals.
Reddit today I fucked up big time. So this week was finals week, and I had two important finals, ones that I knew I had to study for in advance and had a study guides for. First I had chemistry then math.I knew I was gonna have to really buckle down and study for these fin... | 4 | 1 | |
1403294232 | 1403366937 | t3_28o2dv | t5_2to41 | 7 | macadam6: TIFU By having sex with my Gf
So today exactly about 15 minutes ago I met my girlfriend in private. We're not really supposed to see each other but we often just sneak out. So I went to take my dog out for a walk this morning and I saw her. I immediately rushed him back home and told my parents I was going to... | 7 | 1 | |
1403293903 | 1403303597 | t3_28o1v6 | t5_2to41 | 44 | RaceCarAcer: TIFU by going on a rollercoaster
Today...well yesterday, my girlfriend and I went to Canada's Wonderland. Reaching the end of the day and we are riding the behemoth. Seeing as this sucker has an almost 90 degree drop I figured it would be smart to put our hats and sunglasses in the cubby for protection. ... | 4 | 11 | |
1403294764 | 1403297401 | t3_28o38h | t5_2to41 | 9 | [deleted]: TIFU by thinking I locked the bathroom door at work
This happened about an hour ago and it all began at lunch. I was hungrier than usual so I decided eating a chili cheese dog AND chili cheese fries from A&W was a good idea. For the next hour or so I could feel the shit pressure building up inside me lik... | 3 | 3 | |
1403293920 | 1403300754 | t3_28o1vz | t5_2to41 | 8 | wavesurf: TIFU by trying to impress my wife
This happened around three weeks ago. I bought my wife and I long boards, she has always wanted to learn to skateboard and I wanted to teach her. I got us a pair of nice cruiser boards with double kingpin trucks, we had gone to the park once and went for a nice ride (t... | 3 | 2.666667 | |
1403294692 | 1403324930 | t3_28o33x | t5_2to41 | 126 | [deleted]: [TIFU] by making my parents think i´m gay
This actually happened a week ago.
So the background is that i have a friendship with benefits going on with a girl from my town.
Most of the time we met at her house because she was not living with her parents any more (i still do).
So one day she decided to come ... | 4 | 31.5 | |
1403295365 | 1403323813 | t3_28o47x | t5_2to41 | 9 | thepotatochronicles: TIFU big time while partitioning my drive...
or rather, moving the partitions of my drive.
There is this program that is notorious for the long time it takes to move partitions but works a lot better than other ones so I thought, why not try the demo?
So I'm trying to shrink the size of one parti... | 4 | 2.25 | |
1403297871 | 1403298285 | t3_28o877 | t5_2to41 | 4 | [deleted]: TIFU by pooping in pants at work
Box-ception: Well at least you didn't poop somebody else's pants.
crustyoreo: Same.
| 3 | 1.333333 | |
1403297009 | 1403301186 | t3_28o6ut | t5_2to41 | 17 | [deleted]: TIFU by peeing mid-highway.
I hope you don't mind, but this happened a couple years ago. I just found out about r/TIFU, and oh boy do I have some FU's to share with you! Let's start with this one:
Lets go back to my senior year in high school. I was this odd, quiet, grumpy guy who looked like he was 25 at 1... | 3 | 5.666667 | |
1403298963 | 1403425183 | t3_28o9vr | t5_2to41 | 18 | JonnyPotts: TIFU. My Roomate burnt the house down I'm homeless
So I have a Roomate who just graduated from college, and he was moving out. He had just got all his stuff out and Burned some papers from school earlier in the day while I was at work so I had no clue. I got home from work took a shower left for 45 minutes ... | 5 | 3.6 | |
1403298882 | 1403324219 | t3_28o9re | t5_2to41 | 5 | lostmyfoundit: TIFU by forgetting to strap my newborn son in to his car seat.
So my wife had to drive to watch our daughter at a dance recital and would be taking our 3 week old son to his babysitter. I work from home, so before getting to it I spent some time with my son while my wife got herself ready to go. He the... | 4 | 1.25 | |
1403302768 | 1403329902 | t3_28ofpp | t5_2to41 | 5 | droveblackedout: TIFU by driving blacked out in a city
Well, a couple weeks ago. I had been drinking at a festival for a while with friends. Accidentally had a bit more than planned, since I didn't really feel drunk. So, I drove my friend and I to a bar, where we met up with the other friends who took a cab (they had t... | 4 | 1.25 | |
1403304144 | 1403378592 | t3_28ohno | t5_2to41 | 81 | maybeitsjustm3: TIFU by looking at pictures on my laptop
TIFU by finding some pictures I don't think I was supposed to see on my laptop.
Throwaway account here, but my Fiancee and I have been together for 3 and a half years and have the most adorable 20 month old daughter in the entire world. To say that I love my gi... | 6 | 13.5 | |
1403300551 | 1403311565 | t3_28ocf5 | t5_2to41 | 753 | therealbighairy: TIFU by being just like Hitler.
I'll preface this by saying that I have Jewish heritage on my mother's side. Bear this in mind.
So, I have a visitor coming to stay for a couple of days, and as such, I'm scrubbing my flat down, from one end to the other. Yesterday, it was the turn for the bathtub. I... | 18 | 41.833333 | |
1403305008 | 1403368171 | t3_28oix7 | t5_2to41 | 28 | shalunna: TIFU by being gullible...
YIFU by giving the hot blonde at the bar **my** number and not getting **hers**.
I woke up this morning with a hangover, but also a huge smile because I received a text that said, "Guess who this is ;)" As a bi-curious woman, I was elated when a sexy blonde left her lipstick all ove... | 4 | 7 | |
1403308163 | 1403329259 | t3_28onby | t5_2to41 | 20 | [deleted]: TIFU by somehow convincing (m)y best male friend to have sex with me [NSFW]
so I am a straight male and have a problem with my straight best male friend which sort of took a turn I didn't want it to do.
During the last couple days my best friend and me, who live together, had problems. Problems caused by m... | 3 | 6.666667 | |
1403307816 | 1403314799 | t3_28omve | t5_2to41 | 5 | SmartLady: TIFU by buying a recliner from a rent to own place...
I just couldnt afford a new one and they just give anyone credit but the bottom line is ludacris...but I'm pregnant and extreamly uncomfortable....so it is what it is I guess...
emochicksloveme: Enjoy your $18,000 recliner. Just kidding SmartLady
SmartLad... | 3 | 1.666667 | |
1403306195 | 1403364579 | t3_28okl3 | t5_2to41 | 29 | ForgottenPhenom: TIFU by going to Amsterdam... (strippers, shots, beer, an Irish girl, and a bouncer who was a total asshole, all included)
**Preface:**Okay I just found this subreddit like two days ago and I love it and think its fucking hilarious! So I'm sorry, but this was not recent. My trip to Amsterdam happened e... | 5 | 5.8 | |
1403310285 | 1403314162 | t3_28oq1s | t5_2to41 | 16 | [deleted]: TIFU by having holding my daughter
I laugh at dudes getting hit in the balls. Real life, America's Funniest Home Videos, YouTube...hell, even myself. Most of the time, it's really funny. Sure, it hurts...a lot sometimes, but I can always laugh at it.
My daughter is 21 months old. She sees me at the compute... | 3 | 5.333333 | |
1403312211 | 1403313347 | t3_28osla | t5_2to41 | 5 | noahplow: tifu. By farting in my foremans mouth.
cuntflapper1: goddamn dude...are you dyslexic?
noahplow: Yes I am lol Been so my whole life.
| 3 | 1.666667 | |
1403299594 | 1403329781 | t3_28oaw4 | t5_2to41 | 32 | Zippy0223: TIFU by listing one of my qualities on a job application as sensing when people will die.
It took me a good day to fill out an application for a job that really excites me. After proofing it, and having having it proofed 100 times by two different people, I clicked submit. As a sigh of relief escaped me, I w... | 6 | 5.333333 | |
1403315206 | 1403328324 | t3_28owbe | t5_2to41 | 5 | [deleted]: TIFU by giving my girlfriend an anniversary present
first time poster here; ignore formatting errors and typos enjoy :)
been dating this girl (call her "GF") for 2 years, she is a serious relationship girlfriend.
GF is not fat, but not super skinny. I think she is average weight for her height and gender, bu... | 6 | 0.833333 | |
1403319083 | 1403400355 | t3_28p1by | t5_2to41 | 23 | sonictheplumber: TIFU by making a sarcastic remark that got my coworker badly beaten
I work at Long John Silvers with these two guys who are a bit weird. One of them is a young Hispanic, 19 or 20, and the other is a white guy in his early 30s. As silly as it sounds, there's a bit of a rivalry between these two. They ac... | 6 | 3.833333 | |
1403332620 | 1403396185 | t3_28p4g0 | t5_2to41 | -3 | Aritstol: Awesome op, that will show those petty sluts. You put yourself out there and dominated.
bananahead: That's a shitty way to approach dating.
Aritstol: Or an awesome way?
bananahead: A childish and ultimately self-defeating way
Aritstol: You make me sad.
| 5 | -0.6 | |
1403322106 | 1403376866 | t3_28p4tz | t5_2to41 | 47 | [deleted]: TIFU by drinking milk
Months ago I decided to try the GOMAD (gallon of milk a day) diet. During that time by stomach stretched a lot, allowing me to drink that amount with relative ease. Fast forward 8 months to today, and a friend mentions that I can drink an entire gallon of milk. Poor, naive me says yes, ... | 6 | 7.833333 | |
1403323906 | 1403397203 | t3_28p6v9 | t5_2to41 | 25 | [deleted]: TIFU by mom cleaning my room
With only two weeks away from finally moving out, I've been pushing off my laundry to focus on renovating the new apartment. I came home to find that my sweet mother decided to lend a hand by helping with washing my winter laundry (for storage). How lucky am I that she finds my ... | 5 | 5 | |
1403323992 | 1403334576 | t3_28p6ys | t5_2to41 | 29 | SmokeWeedEveryMinute: TIFU by mixing drugs, alcohol, and sex
To start off you need to understand how wasted i was,
i smoked about half a gram from my bong and drunk 1/4 litre of vodka on a 24 hour empty stomach .
also when i was sober i needed to piss but it was so cold outside it was never going to happen and i soon ... | 3 | 9.666667 | |
1403324001 | 1403325313 | t3_28p6z6 | t5_2to41 | 81 | Keplz: TIFU by trying to pull a lollipop off the stick
This literally just happened to me, and I feel like the stupidest person in the world, and thought, "Damn, I just fucked up" and what was the next logical step? I post here in TIFU... Anyway...
I was eating a dum dum lollipop, and anyone who has had a dum dum bef... | 4 | 20.25 | |
1403326082 | 1403365986 | t3_28p9bp | t5_2to41 | 29 | flavoredonionrings: (TIFU) telling my black friend to go and pick cotton
So we were doing some improv in acting class, and it was my turn to go up with my black friend. He was being all confrontational in the improv.(which is what you're suppose to do) and off the top off my head I respond with "why don't you go away a... | 3 | 9.666667 | |
1403324498 | 1403361408 | t3_28p7jf | t5_2to41 | 9 | elliottman: TIFU by itching my sack in class!
this happened when i was in high school so One day in class I was sitting at my desk doing nothing as usual, when I got a sudden itch on my sack So I put my hands down my pants and start scratching it for only a few seconds and i was pretty sure no one saw me WRONG !!!!!!! ... | 3 | 3 | |
1403325429 | 1403365585 | t3_28p8le | t5_2to41 | 96 | FilthyNipple: TIFU by smearing Germ-X on my friends acne covered face.
This could very well be one of the biggest mistakes I've made in my life. I mean it.
Every year my friends and I volunteer as camp counselors at a local youth camp. Needless to say we deal with some germy little shits. After slapping a countless nu... | 6 | 16 | |
1403326702 | 1403505257 | t3_28pa0s | t5_2to41 | 1 | ChubakTheGreat: TIFU by taking too much Ambiens in 7 AM and ruined my life
This obviously happened yesterday because I just now gained back the control of my brain.
My memory is hazy, but I remember the gist of the things I did.
At 5AM I took two Ambiens. It got me fucked up enough that, after seeing a female classma... | 9 | 0.111111 | |
1403329840 | 1403331228 | t3_28pd2d | t5_2to41 | 16 | abcdefghijklmnopp: TIFU by having a divorce party.
I thought I was so mature. This was three weeks ago. I'm still alive.
My last night in this state with my wife. Our divorce was finalized. I thinks to us both that well we will drink some wine and watch a movie. It will be just like every other night. We are so moder... | 3 | 5.333333 | |
1403327716 | 1403359618 | t3_28pb1y | t5_2to41 | 21 | MikeOxbigg: TIFU by accidentally taking a drunk piss on my dog.
So I haven't had a drink in a few days (a big accomplishment for me) since I'm working on getting into prime shape for my Army contract (18X, if anyone is wondering).
I drank 12-pack of high-octane beer and had myself a small emergency, so I ran outside.... | 14 | 1.5 | |
1403331282 | 1403383295 | t3_28peed | t5_2to41 | 197 | GlitterandKitties: TIFU by letting my boyfriend fix my computer.
I should say this up front, my boyfriend and I are going through a rough patch. Constantly fighting because he is waaay too close with this other girl. (she sends him nudes. She tells him she loves him. she begs for him. and he doesnt say no.) So yeah, I'... | 10 | 19.7 | |
1403333022 | 1403368104 | t3_28pfyd | t5_2to41 | 29 | DigitalReaper: TIFU by asking my crush to dance
Now’s it’s time for a little backstory. During our prom, I’d asked a girl that I had a crush on to go dance with me. Let’s call her V. Naturally, I was rejected. We didn’t know each other that well, I’ve only had a small amount of conversations with her before. She defini... | 3 | 9.666667 | |
1403330672 | 1403334845 | t3_28pdvb | t5_2to41 | 2 | throwaway12464: TIFU by making my mother think i am gay
footm13: Not at all
Source : Fellow pcmasterrace brother
throwaway12464: so i am not gay but my father says i have no life do i?
| 3 | 0.666667 | |
1403335256 | 1403384694 | t3_28phve | t5_2to41 | 66 | mrbrutka: TIFU by drinking milk for the first time in 11 months
As far as I know I'm not allergic to milk or lactose intolerant, but I don't like the taste much so I generally don't drink it. However for some reason, today when I woke up I decided to have a bowl of cereal with milk. Throughout the day I had no sign of ... | 8 | 8.25 | |
1403335722 | 1403389925 | t3_28pi7k | t5_2to41 | 20 | [deleted]: TIFU: By seeing an old Muslim man drunk and didn't help him.
This story happened few years ago.
I was in NYC and taking the bus back to my home. After paying the fare and having a seat. I found a drunk old Muslim man that look religious entered the bus. He talked in an incomprehensible way that no one under... | 4 | 5 | |
1403340012 | 1403507018 | t3_28pl5y | t5_2to41 | 14 | bellagioia: TIFU by practically cutting my roommate's dog's eat off.
Today, I FUCKED up.
Let me start by saying I adore my animals, &all animals.
My friend has this weird long-haired chihuahua papillon.
Wicket. Sweetheart, tiny, and well taken care of (by me, usually she smells like cigarettes and has little mat... | 5 | 2.8 | |
1403330380 | 1403423948 | t3_28pdlh | t5_2to41 | 41 | jomosexual: Tifu by trying to send a dick pic to my boyfriend
So my boyfriends at work and almost home, naturally I want to send him a pic of my boner so we can fool around.
Welp, I sent three emails and my cock to a director I'm working under next week.
So now I have to edit and film with a guy who has seen my hard... | 9 | 4.555556 | |
1403346947 | 1403430150 | t3_28ppoh | t5_2to41 | 253 | benoliver999: TIFU by asking for a threesome with my girlfriend's colleagues.
Oh god my time has come to post here.
I live with my girlfriend. We're still in very close contact with an old university friend of ours, with whom we had a running joke about wife swapping/getting weird with each other. I can't really reme... | 4 | 63.25 | |
1403349924 | 1403412131 | t3_28prmr | t5_2to41 | 694 | MrOxfordComma: TIFU by playing world of warcraft at my friend's house.
This happened some years ago, when I was in high school. I had this friend with whom I used to play world of warcraft. We played for hours and hours and were totally addicted to it. Sometimes it got late while playing and I had to spend the night at... | 5 | 138.8 | |
1403351968 | 1403358096 | t3_28pt0t | t5_2to41 | 7 | Nicksterr2000: TIFU by hiding my Fiancée's engagement ring.
TIFU by hiding my Fiancée's engagement ring:
I purposed to my Fiancée 4 weeks ago, and she frequently leaves her ring at home because it'd be a potential distraction to the kids she works with (special needs pre-school). This past weekend she left her ring at ... | 4 | 1.75 | |
1403351634 | 1403415176 | t3_28pst7 | t5_2to41 | 30 | DogeSaint-Germain: TIFU by answering a porn related quiz question in the presence of my older sister.
We were both playing a multiplayer quiz game on my mobile, each answering the questions we knew. This was the last question of a hard fought match and we were both very eager to win the match; the responses to the ques... | 4 | 7.5 | |
1403354098 | 1403386065 | t3_28puo2 | t5_2to41 | 1,177 | Bakeryboss: TIFU by farting after surgery
Mouler: Every surface in every hospital has been shat on. Nothing new. Blame anesthesia.
jpkotor: It's always anesthesia's fault. Unless there's a med student, then it's the med student's fault. If there is a med student on anesthesia... God have mercy on him. Academic medicin... | 7 | 168.142857 | |
1403334692 | 1403560734 | t3_28pheb | t5_2to41 | 19 | themrcool: TIFU by falling for a phishing site and lost my steam account.
Last night I was trading for new Team Fortress 2 weapons. A stranger friended as said "my friend wants to trade with you add him here *phishing site*". Without thinking I typed in my secure information. The site did some weird redirect and It too... | 7 | 2.714286 | |
1403354761 | 1403360818 | t3_28pv7l | t5_2to41 | 51 | [deleted]: TIFU by locking myself out of my work
I am a computer programmer that is allowed to work at any time I please. Today I decided to come into work at 6:00 AM (on a saturday). The thing is no one is at the office on saturday. I went inside and did a little bit of work. I then went outside for a smoke only to re... | 4 | 12.75 | |
1403361168 | 1403414814 | t3_28q1ko | t5_2to41 | 321 | [deleted]: TIFU by allowing a gas plume to close down a Panera Bread
This was from a few years ago but I never told the story on reddit. So backstory to this. I started working at a Panera as an general staff, and was immediately after orientation worried about a few things. The thing that concerned me the most was tha... | 7 | 45.857143 | |
1403362822 | 1403453626 | t3_28q3ku | t5_2to41 | 28 | redditcoder: TIFU by (almost) accidentally stealing from Walmart.
Just got done working out at the gym, and what better way to celebrate than getting some Little Debbie Nutty Bars, right? I headed over to Walmart.
T-Mobile just announced "Music Freedom". Streaming music from the Internet no longer counts against my da... | 6 | 4.666667 | |
1403366020 | 1403367544 | t3_28q7hb | t5_2to41 | 6 | [deleted]: TIFU by betraying my best friend with his girlfriend.
The day before yesterday, I was having a chat with my best friend let's call him "JHON", he was telling that his girlfriend just broke up with him (let's call her SUMMER), and suddenly while we were talking SUMMER called (she never called me), I so told J... | 5 | 1.2 | |
1403354230 | 1403369200 | t3_28puri | t5_2to41 | 30 | [deleted]: TIFU by peeing on some patté
Bit of back-story first: Last week I was at my boyfriends house, it was late at night and we were both pretty stoned. His older brother was also still awake and had been cleaning out chicken liver pâté jars all weekend for some reason...
So, at about 5am my boyfriend and I were ... | 3 | 10 | |
1403367768 | 1403404445 | t3_28q9ui | t5_2to41 | 74 | eightNote: It's Shat Myself Saturday! Let's hear your poop stories!
re: [this,](http://www.reddit.com/r/tifu/comments/28jky7/meta_a_shitty_compromise/) today there's no moratorium on talking shit, so let one rip and tell us how it happened!
shitty_party_dress: Just happened to me today. So I'm headed to my best friend... | 5 | 14.8 | |
1403367330 | 1403491909 | t3_28q97y | t5_2to41 | 10 | Lex_a_pro: TIFU by getting high on the first date
So I haven't been on a date in quite some time, and I finally got a cute girl's number who actually agreed to go out and get dinner with me.
The night was going very well and we were both having a really good time all the way through dinner. I was fairly sure by the en... | 4 | 2.5 | |
1403369373 | 1403425259 | t3_28qbzv | t5_2to41 | 3 | throwthisfarawayfrom: TIFU by pissing off the police and getting arrested. Help?
Asian male here. Made a police report against someone but pissed off the officers while making statements. Got arrested (charge is unclear) and am on bail now.
Highly probably that police is watching, i.e. phone's tapped, room may be bug... | 3 | 1 | |
1403369452 | 1403559737 | t3_28qc47 | t5_2to41 | 119 | Ayooatip: TIFU by having sex with my girlfriend NSFW
This was actually 4 years ago. I was 19 and I had finally gotten a real girlfriend. And we were at the honeymoon phase where we were having sex every night. And was it great. We we would sleep at each other's houses every other day and paint the town red. One night s... | 6 | 19.833333 | |
1403370436 | 1403429929 | t3_28qdlv | t5_2to41 | 371 | anusofdestiny: TIFU by shitting in an open high school locker room shower
I found this subreddit a few days ago and read through a bunch of f ups and it encouraged me to tell you all about the worst day of my life. This is my first post, so bare with me.
I was on the high school football team. Every morning in the o... | 5 | 74.2 |
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