start_date stringlengths 10 10 | end_date stringlengths 10 10 | thread_id stringlengths 8 10 ⌀ | subreddit stringclasses 1
value | subreddit_id stringclasses 1
value | total_score int64 -564 194k | text stringlengths 52 58.9k | num_messages int64 3 160 | avg_score float64 -55.17 14.3k |
|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|
1404330661 | 1404338158 | t3_29oeaf | t5_2to41 | 21 | zenoob: TIFU by wasting 2 days of hard work by my parents and 150€ worth of food.
Well fuck. I hoped I would only come on this reddit to laugh at people's face and their misfortune. Karma slapped me right back in my baby face.
Here's the context : my parents are Hmong (google that shit) and they kinda still have thei... | 5 | 4.2 | |
1404323361 | 1404446502 | t3_29o1lh | t5_2to41 | 9 | assbangcowboy: TIFU by almost assaulting an elderly lady
This didn't happen today, but Sunday night.
I had been visiting one of my in-laws, who is currently still in critical condition at a local hospital and...well, he's in bad shape. It has taken a huge toll on the family to see him wither away week by week. On Sun... | 3 | 3 | |
1404331851 | 1404350184 | t3_29ogfg | t5_2to41 | 137 | [deleted]: TIFU by not going to pick up my dog from my sister-in-laws early enough
This was yesterday but it happened super late and I'm still dealing with the rammifications today. My wife dropped off our dog to her sisters and we went about our day like normal. We put off going to pick her up because it's 110° F outs... | 5 | 27.4 | |
1404332327 | 1404333847 | t3_29oha0 | t5_2to41 | 17 | Aerspasius: TIFU by burning my penis
So a bit of background first, I am a novice gardener and decided to try my hand at growing peppers specifically habaneros and jalapenos. Now the jalapenos have grown nicely and i decided try try my first pepper on a Jack Daniels pulled chicken sandwich and In my naivety I cut up the... | 3 | 5.666667 | |
1404334262 | 1404423156 | t3_29okkr | t5_2to41 | 159 | [deleted]: TIFU by wasting thousands of dollars on an apparel startup that to date has sold 4 shirts.
canadiankorean: Have u ever considered that maybe your shirts just suck?
Rauchbaum: Did some research, the website is this: http://bashfulhound.com/ - you can judge for yourself
canadiankorean: that is some cringewor... | 7 | 22.714286 | |
1404335899 | 1404355395 | t3_29onfw | t5_2to41 | 7 | _White_Lies_: TIFU by not checking the gas.
Hello friends! This is all of my second post so please be gentle with me.
So some back story to explain, the clutch on my truck went out last week and needed replacing, sadly this fell under the category of I don't know how to fix it BUT my girlfriends step dad did and gave ... | 3 | 2.333333 | |
1404337330 | 1404346107 | t3_29opwz | t5_2to41 | 16 | Fake_reddit_: TIFU: bondage and a mother-in-law [NSFW]
So this happened a while ago but I will write it as if it just happened.
I am 16yo and my GF is 17. We are both in our first really committed relationship. I just moved into my second apartment (mistake live with your folks as long as you can). I also had a roomma... | 4 | 4 | |
1404339485 | 1404340654 | t3_29otfc | t5_2to41 | 19 | abominable_hoeman: TIFU by taking a picture.
I'm currently en route to LA to visit my family. I have a connection at O'Hare and the layover is 3 hours. Anyway, I'm sitting there bored off my ass and this group of high school students who are on some study abroad type program come by. I look over and there's a girl who... | 5 | 3.8 | |
1404340590 | 1404343762 | t3_29ov9q | t5_2to41 | 5 | [deleted]: TIFU by pickin and stickin to it.
TL;DR :Picked my nose got caught.
This happened earlier today. So I accompanied my friend to go eat at his university. He goes into class and I stay studying in the library for my final tomorrow. Now, since it's summer there aren't much people around. So I just found the cl... | 3 | 1.666667 | |
1404338008 | 1404370618 | t3_29or1o | t5_2to41 | 12 | MartinChavalinov: [NSFW] TIFU at the RC.
The_Rhythm_Ninja: Fuck that -don't feel guilty. If they kept clean facilities, you wouldn't of had to spray paint the walls. That's their bad, homie ;)
LexBattenberg: I agree with this dude
| 3 | 4 | |
1404342074 | 1404400855 | t3_29oxkq | t5_2to41 | 388 | [deleted]: TIFU by punching my girlfriend. She was trying to give me a blowjob.
So I was in deep sleep this morning when I feel like someone/something is touching me, and it's kinda rough. I kinda open up my eyes and IT'S THERE, I DONT KNOW WHAT TO DO SO I FALCON PUNCH THAT MOTHERFUCKER! I rub me eyes fast and there's ... | 7 | 55.428571 | |
1404342075 | 1404343694 | t3_29oxkt | t5_2to41 | 35 | Vamiinfu: TIFU by flashing my paused homemade porno to my boss
Throw away obviously.
I was bored at work & I was going through my gallery on my phone when I came across my vacation porno. I watch it because I'm quite proud of it. I paused it while I was mid deep throat when my boss calls on me to ask me about an or... | 3 | 11.666667 | |
1404337906 | 1404346519 | t3_29oqvz | t5_2to41 | 50 | Zintilyaspin: TIFU by playing a prank
***How To Almost Get Expelled By Being a Fucking Idiot: a comprehensive guide***
Step 1) Be in Summer School, and have roommates
Step 2) Decide to play a prank on one of your roommates
Step 3) Steal his mattress, and pretend to know nothing about it. Hide the mattress in his clo... | 5 | 10 | |
1404337662 | 1404368224 | t3_29oqhc | t5_2to41 | 5 | Chazzlessss: TIFU CSGO cockblocked me..
I was just about to start a game of CSGO when this girl came over to my house. I was sitting in the lobby, and the girl was just sitting in my room talking to me. My friends really wanted to start the game, So he typed "Tart" to me on steam instead of "Start".. the message popp... | 5 | 1 | |
1404340772 | 1404414079 | t3_29ovm0 | t5_2to41 | 8 | Throwawaymd96: tifu by calling my manager a bitch
My manager wasn't giving me a number so I said "way to be a bitch (name here)" jokingly and he yelled at me for it and I told him I realized it was wrong for me to do that and told him profusely and now I don't know what to do he smirked when I said I was sorry.
srvaugh... | 4 | 2 | |
1404342979 | 1404366995 | t3_29oyzi | t5_2to41 | 10 | Exeazs: TIFU by having no memory
This happened two weeks ago, however the it was only discovered today. I'm a youth who doesn't drink very often and when I do, I usually get really fucked up and have no recollection of the past events the following day. I hear all the time of the cringe worthy things I do however, this... | 5 | 2 | |
1404343552 | 1404344973 | t3_29ozvn | t5_2to41 | 37 | babybatterup: TIFU by having a small cock...
Magyman: Do you not hold your dick when you piss?
Rtwose: Quoting op:
I ran into the bathroom, sat down
Would be a bit weird if he was still holding his dick at this point (though, given the story, might now be prudent?)
Magyman: I mean, he got to the point where the flow... | 4 | 9.25 | |
1404345260 | 1404345708 | t3_29p2iw | t5_2to41 | 5 | DonkeyKongSSJ69: TIFU on a drink run
Got co-workers' drinks and money and went on a boba run. Got there, waited in line for 30 minutes since apparently school's out for the summer. After double/triple checking the orders and the results, I pick the stuff up and load it up and head back to the office. I greatly misun... | 4 | 1.25 | |
1404343938 | 1404393585 | t3_29p0ir | t5_2to41 | 92 | cwood1973: TIFU by buying dinner for my daughter and her friends.
Last night my teenage daughter had some friends come into town and I took them all out to dinner. We went out to a nice family restaurant and I told them I'd pick up the tab.
When the check came I pulled my wallet from my back pocket, opened it, and a c... | 5 | 18.4 | |
1404346026 | 1404346475 | t3_29p3ow | t5_2to41 | 4 | Daftfather: Tifu by forgetting my ticket
Well this is happening right now, so I would say it's pretty fresh.
This morning I woke up, checked that I had remembered to pack everything I needed for a week of beer and loathing at Denmark's biggest festival, Roskilde, and headed for the airport.
Well I just found ou... | 3 | 1.333333 | |
1404347238 | 1404361327 | t3_29p5o4 | t5_2to41 | 8 | yourmomlikedit69: Tifu by getting head
Murtillon: Are you from MN?
yourmomlikedit69: The Somali capital of america? Yes.
Murtillon: Lol thought so. I also live there.
| 4 | 2 | |
1404340499 | 1404374055 | t3_29ov3i | t5_2to41 | 17 | hopeidontdie: TIFU by snorting weed.
So this actually happened this last Saturday. I recently moved about 3 hours away from home, so I don't get many chances to visit. So I drove up and planned on spending the whole weekend in my hometown.
Anyway, come Saturday, my cousin called me and asked if I wanted to chill and s... | 4 | 4.25 | |
1404349729 | 1404372288 | t3_29p97r | t5_2to41 | 21 | El_K_Uno: TIFU by asking my one armed coworker if he "needs a hand."
This happened a couple days ago. Sorry for the delay. I bartend a hotel bar. We had a wedding party buy out almost the entire hotel over the weekend. They were one of the least respectful groups I've ever dealt with, but that's another story. One of t... | 5 | 4.2 | |
1404347702 | 1404353484 | t3_29p6eg | t5_2to41 | 25 | [deleted]: TIFU by jacking off without locking my bedroom door after drinking all night with my roommate.
It was a month or two ago, but [another post](http://www.reddit.com/r/tifu/comments/29o89r/tifu_by_masturbating_while_drunk/) just reminded me of it.
I was drinking with my roommate. Hard. Probably 3 am, I decide ... | 5 | 5 | |
1404354647 | 1404355158 | t3_29pglj | t5_2to41 | 4 | GnarlyByGnature: TIFU by trying to give a homeless man a dollar...
ol-stinkbug: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_WCiBPjckTg&t=1m22s
GnarlyByGnature: Ahhhh, Neely... :D
| 3 | 1.333333 | |
1404357142 | 1404357833 | t3_29pk74 | t5_2to41 | 10 | Scheddar: TIFU by masturbating with my markers. [Absolutely NSFW]
DongWise: So what are you going to do with the old ones? Someone might buy them
Someone....
Scheddar: I think I finally purged them and threw them out in a tightly wrapped trashbag..
| 3 | 3.333333 | |
1404337803 | 1404367213 | t3_29oqpt | t5_2to41 | 14 | the_winter_storm: TIFU by coloring my hair.
Okay so I'm coloring my hair (if you haven't figured it out by this point, I am a woman).
I color my hair all the time (or at least, I used to) and I finally decided I would color it today. Well, I've never closed the bathroom door in the past because I haven't needed a rea... | 8 | 1.75 | |
1404359998 | 1404400377 | t3_29po3x | t5_2to41 | 9 | dancer69: Tifu by making my fwb think i thought he would hit me (im an asshole)
(28/f) past: was in an abusive relationship for 6 yrs.
Tifu: was chillin w/fwb when i got the sudden urge to bite him. So i did, on the neck forgettin i need to only bite where cloths can hide b/c he bruises easy. He jumped up to look in th... | 8 | 1.125 | |
1404359206 | 1404398906 | t3_29pn2b | t5_2to41 | 58 | [deleted]: TIFU by getting a blowjob
So as all TIFU start out, this was about 2 years ago with my ex girlfriend. We were a long distance relationship and hardly ever saw each other. Well after awhile, we were at her house just hanging out, about to go see The Avengers, and she offers to give me a blowjob.
Well it must... | 4 | 14.5 | |
1404343580 | 1404663272 | t3_29ozxn | t5_2to41 | 12 | [deleted]: TIFU by biking 11 km (~7 miles) whilst fasting
Yes this actually happened today but whilst I'm typing it'll not be. Anyway I on my holidays now and I wanted to get fit. This month is Ramadan, I do it for non religious reasons, but I wouldn't let that stop me on my way, so I begin a plan for biking to improve... | 6 | 2 | |
1404362950 | 1404420798 | t3_29ps3v | t5_2to41 | 27 | ScroogeMcDuckII: TIFU by letting my nuts hang.
Jesus, I didn't think i'd be posting here so soon. So...
I was having some sexytimes with the lady, there was lube involved (i'll leave it at that). So I guess throughout the night it moved from my shaft to my nuts, eventually coating them in lube. Didn't care, having sex... | 3 | 9 | |
1404362466 | 1404400075 | t3_29prfi | t5_2to41 | 18 | mida0: TIFU by not turning cellular data off on my phone
I've been reading this sub-reddit for a while now and whilst my fuck up does not include any sexual elements, accidentally assaulting people or bodily fluid malfunctions it's still a fuck up.
This actually happened over a month but I only got the phone bill tod... | 5 | 3.6 | |
1404365277 | 1404421712 | t3_29pv2s | t5_2to41 | 139 | Carldon60: TIFU by getting high and opening a window.
So for the past week or so, a hornets nest has been growing on my bedroom window. It was in a spot where if you opened the window, the nest would be squished and hornets would fly out. Me, being sharp, noted that I probably shouldn't open the window until I get a ch... | 10 | 13.9 | |
1404364703 | 1404370197 | t3_29pudf | t5_2to41 | 13 | Forehead58: TIFU by missing an exit on the freeway.
It was the last exit before the border to Canada. Yes, there are signs, flashing in fact, all over the place, saying "last exit before border crossing." I was joking to my wife and sister passengers about how there are too many signs, and it looks like it's pointing a... | 5 | 2.6 | |
1404368960 | 1404372104 | t3_29pz3a | t5_2to41 | 21 | parham90: Tifu by self-defense
This happened about ten years ago, and after a month of reading Tifu, I suddenly remembered it last night and thought I'd post.
If you look at my profile, you will find that I'm blind. If you look in deeper, you will find that I live in Iran. If you go and Google, you will find that Iran... | 3 | 7 | |
1404373532 | 1404461899 | t3_29q3dk | t5_2to41 | 9 | Snowbound622: TIFU by accidentally hitting "send"
Gf and I frequently joke about my stoicism and my rather dry sense of humor. She thinks I can't just make a stupid comment/joke on the spot. Anyway, a friend just introduced me to Doctor Who, which I now love, and I realized that's it would be taking up my free ti... | 4 | 2.25 | |
1404367614 | 1404395985 | t3_29pxsl | t5_2to41 | 8 | [deleted]: TIFU by installing an OS on my backup hard drive.
Tonight I went to install a different distribution of Linux on my laptop. My backup HDD was plugged in as I needed to transfer some files over when the install was finished. Well, instead of installing on the machine drive the OS wiped over my backup drive. I... | 3 | 2.666667 | |
1404377101 | 1404387358 | t3_29q6e5 | t5_2to41 | -11 | [deleted]: TIFU by bringing a date on a road trip and getting rejected (very sad)
So today I basically Completely fucked up by deciding to go on a road trip over 8h away from home with a date.
To make a long story short, She is currently in the bedroom with my friend while I'm sleeping on a fucking couch. I wish I... | 4 | -2.75 | |
1404374723 | 1404579731 | t3_29q4g6 | t5_2to41 | 350 | theking_yemma: TIFU by accidentally flashing on the bus (NSFW)
After my maths class I decided to play basketball in the outdoor court because one of my friends brought a ball in with him (I hadn't planned to play basketball so I just played in the clothes I was in), and when I went for a layup, my jeans ripped (I mean ... | 6 | 58.333333 | |
1404376256 | 1404440668 | t3_29q5rl | t5_2to41 | 27 | RainbowGoddamnDash: TIFU by wearing noise canceling headphones
This has literally happened about 10 minutes ago.
I was looking forward to finishing off my night with a proper good bye from lady Palm Le-la and her friends, the devious digits. So off I went to the depths of reddit and found an interesting couple of vid... | 4 | 6.75 | |
1404383406 | 1404609300 | t3_29qbcw | t5_2to41 | 1,771 | thecosmicgoose: TIFU: by over filling a tire.
technically this happened over the weekend, but i think it still qualifies.
i was on my way to a doctors appointment when i noticed my left front tire was acting a bit weird. i pull into a service station and go about checking it, to find it a bit low on air. while i was ... | 15 | 118.066667 | |
1404384262 | 1404457043 | t3_29qc28 | t5_2to41 | 1,438 | Airman822: TIFU by participating in the "Cold Water Challenge"
Today I was nominated to do the cold water challenge. If you don't know what this is, it's this tread going around Facebook and what not. Basically what happens is once you get nominated by a friend or family member (who we're nominated by someone else), ... | 11 | 130.727273 | |
1404383096 | 1404408000 | t3_29qb3s | t5_2to41 | 63 | Firebolt1914: TIFU by not bringing a tarp to a week-long campout
I'll make this one short and simple (I'm typing from my phone.
I'm currently inside of a "permanent" tent, and the roof is usually fairly waterproof. However, today, heavy rains went through and dripped down onto my cot, getting my sleeping bag, mattress... | 7 | 9 | |
1404396029 | 1404431278 | t3_29qocx | t5_2to41 | 1,392 | tifu_for_real: TIFU by masturbating with my mother-in-law underwear over my face
Apologies for not creating an explicit topic, I just not sure how can I even summarize it for the topic.
My wife and I are married for five years. We have good relationships, all casual and stuff. I'm a fairly sexual person, so she kn... | 10 | 139.2 | |
1404396462 | 1404397444 | t3_29qozi | t5_2to41 | 20 | QwerkyBurkey: TIFU by making my little brother have an asthma attack
This started technically today as it was 12:01 AM when this started
I was getting ready for bed to wake up to my birthday and before bed I had a thought "lets put some deodorant on so I'm not as sweaty when I wake up", a fool proof idea I thought of ... | 3 | 6.666667 | |
1404385116 | 1404406427 | t3_29qcs0 | t5_2to41 | 78 | Rtwose: TIFU by trying to wind a colleague up and not paying enough attention
This took place a few years ago. Names have been replaced.
I used to work as part of a unit that had 4 teams of 3 people, working 24x7 shifts on rotation monitoring the critical systems for a large mobile phone company.
One year, the guy in... | 4 | 19.5 | |
1404396916 | 1404415333 | t3_29qpm1 | t5_2to41 | 45 | [deleted]: TIFU By Puking on my one night stand.
So this happened a couple of weeks ago.
I met this guy on a dating site and we decide to hook up. We drove around town talking and decide to head back to my place.
So we get to my place and start getting down to busissnes. I start going down on him and all of a sudden, ... | 6 | 7.5 | |
1404397939 | 1404403931 | t3_29qr78 | t5_2to41 | 5 | luknash: TIFU by talking to a friend
This happened just 10 minutes ago.
I was just out getting groceries and had to get quite a lot because i'm home alone all weekend. I live 100 meters from this shop so i decided to not get a bag, because it's not really needed.
Then i met one of my good friends just outside of the... | 3 | 1.666667 | |
1404401728 | 1404416750 | t3_29qxba | t5_2to41 | 119 | [deleted]: TIFU by not killing a squirrel
As I was driving on my way to work today, I saw a sad looking dead squirrel just on the far side of the double yellow lines. He had obviously been run over recently, but his body was all twisted and knotted.
As I was driving by, he suddenly started quickly crawling towards me... | 9 | 13.222222 | |
1404402397 | 1404416617 | t3_29qycl | t5_2to41 | 56 | seraph77: TIFU by not cleaning up water on the floor
About a month or so ago, on a Thursday, I had the absolute perfect day to look forward to on Friday.
1. The building we work at was throwing a "Customer Appreciation Day" where they hire this awesome local catering company (whose food I love) and do door prizes, etc... | 4 | 14 | |
1404403431 | 1404435894 | t3_29r036 | t5_2to41 | 52 | ilostmyphoneonce: TIFU by Sending My Manager a Sexy Snapchat
I did my best to poison my liver last night and I made a few dumb choices. Or rather, one choice that was sent to many people. I recently ended a dating relationship because he moved to Canada for work. My friend took me out to get my mind off of it and we di... | 4 | 13 | |
1404405196 | 1404616170 | t3_29r2xf | t5_2to41 | 12 | AccidentalRebel72: TIFU by fighting too well.
Last night at a Martial arts class. Practicing our grappling, me and another guy squared off. I managed to get in close enough to hip throw him, he landed on his back with me on top of him. We scrambled and I ended up taking his back. I got my legs hooked around his and snu... | 7 | 1.714286 | |
1404405543 | 1404522824 | t3_29r3hj | t5_2to41 | 153 | puke_away: [TIFU] by puking on my one night stand.
So this started the way these stories usually do, by being horny. Recently I have been chatting with this cutie on tinder, and last night I invited her out to get some drinks.
We get to the bar and place our orders for some sushi and drinks. And she is even better tha... | 3 | 51 | |
1404407392 | 1404439088 | t3_29r6h5 | t5_2to41 | 26 | sunosun: TIFU by playing Pandora
Finally we had courage to take a vacation with my 18 month old. It was not easy for a immigrant family with most of the close family outside our residence country. He is the most beautiful thing in our life until he cries out loud and don't sleep. The first day went fine but last night ... | 4 | 6.5 | |
1404409095 | 1404414846 | t3_29r9ba | t5_2to41 | 5 | [deleted]: Tifu by feeling confident in front of my wife
DramDemon: Tl;Dr: Don't try to fart. Just let it come.
call_me_fabio: sounds like a new fetish
| 3 | 1.666667 | |
1404407101 | 1404473620 | t3_29r61d | t5_2to41 | 16 | whynotpersephone: TIFU by getting Benadryl-high and spilling coffee all over myself.
I have developed seasonal allergies. I never take Benadryl, but my skin and throat were itchy, so I went to the pharmacy and bought some.
I am slight of frame and about 30 minutes after taking it, was feeling pretty sleepy. Head to co... | 8 | 2 | |
1404409126 | 1404465281 | t3_29r9cy | t5_2to41 | 241 | BearsBears: TIFU By Showing My Mom How To FaceBook.
I found myself in a tight spot financially. My car went to the shop, I put a deposit down on a house, rent was due, and so were the utility bills. So something had to give. So naturally I did what I imagine everyone does when they find themselves in this predicament, ... | 5 | 48.2 | |
1404406139 | 1404659333 | t3_29r4ff | t5_2to41 | 236 | [deleted]: TIFU by Masturbating Drunk 2.0
This was some time ago, but I came home very much wasted after a Friday night of shenanigans. I live with 2 roommates and they were asleep when I got home.
After several attempts I finally got the front door of the house open, only to slam it against the wall. Went to the kit... | 4 | 59 | |
1404351191 | 1404416846 | t3_29pbc2 | t5_2to41 | 8 | [deleted]: TIFU by dropping a hammer on my head
I was at the restaurant I work at hanging an open sign I just bought from Costco. After many corrections I finally got it level and stepped off the ladder to admire my work.
I then folded the ladder and went to go walk back inside when I felt a massive object hit the top... | 6 | 1.333333 | |
1404410458 | 1404607172 | t3_29rbi4 | t5_2to41 | 180 | Lithiarch: TIFU by trying to give a Mango Smoothie to a Mannequin.
Alright, so I've done a lot of stupid stuff in my life, but this... for some reason, it just seems worse for some reason. I just realized that anyone from LC/ Bay Area will probably recognize me, but fuck it, it's too late to go back now.
**tl;dr b... | 8 | 22.5 | |
1404412684 | 1404424291 | t3_29rfim | t5_2to41 | 67 | burninghooha: TIFU by drying off after showering
This literally happened no more than an hour ago.
Anyway a short back story: Last night I decided not to shower because my back was bothering me and I wanted to use some icy hot on it. Now if you have ever used icy hot, then you know that you shouldn't use it before or ... | 3 | 22.333333 | |
1404414275 | 1404420098 | t3_29ri4q | t5_2to41 | 20 | Obviathrowawayname: TIFU by cheating and hurting a friend
I don't know what to say. I've hurt the person I cared about the most and a close friend. It was a couple of drinks, it was a one night thing, a lapse of judgement. I came clean broke her trust and then had to tell the friend what we did was meaningless. I'm bur... | 5 | 4 | |
1404411960 | 1404416660 | t3_29re74 | t5_2to41 | 14 | MissedYourJoke: TIFU by falling out of bed, ripping out a ceiling fan, and face-planting into a metal shower door frame.
This happened over the weekend, but I've been busy.
So Thursday last week, I was having a really bad day. I was facing jail time and a bunch of other shit. Anyway, I have weird sleeping problems an... | 3 | 4.666667 | |
1404414523 | 1404556703 | t3_29rilx | t5_2to41 | 14 | pretty-little-liar: TIFU by skiing straight into a tree.
*Disclaimer: this actually happened a few winters ago, I may be Canadian, but July's still hot as fuck.
I was on a class trip to a ski hill (yeah, a FEW winters ago) and I had never gone skiing before. But being the dummy that I am, I decided that I was ready to... | 3 | 4.666667 | |
1404414519 | 1404419122 | t3_29rilk | t5_2to41 | 16 | A_c00k1e: Tifu by stabbing myself in the eye with my glasses at the eye doctors
Title says it all. Did it right infront of a doctor with the arm on my glasses
EDIT: more or less poked myself with the part that hangs on your ear. Trying to be cool and put them on 1 handed
cyrilfelix: How does one stab themselves with gl... | 3 | 5.333333 | |
1404416605 | 1404427427 | t3_29rm2g | t5_2to41 | 39 | [deleted]: TIFU by sexually harassing a secretary.
Today I walked into the office building of some clients. 8 or 9 guys came to greet me at reception, hands were shook, badges were issued and they started walking me to a meeting room.
I've been there a few times before and I noticed that there was a new receptionist o... | 6 | 6.5 | |
1404417592 | 1404438101 | t3_29rno6 | t5_2to41 | 34 | n8poppy: TIFU by dusting the big screen TV I had for sale
In the process of moving I had a guy coming to buy my 56" 1080P DLP television. Disconnecting cables from the set I noticed it was very dusty in the back. So I blasted some compressed air to remove the dust. The television was on at the time...Everything was ... | 6 | 5.666667 | |
1404418036 | 1404426312 | t3_29rofc | t5_2to41 | 26 | fucks_equal_zero: TIFU by shaving
Actually happened today.
I got a straight razor a few months ago and have become really proficient at using it. I had a beer, or three....got brave and decided to do some manscaping. what manlier way to do it than with that straight razor?
Never again.
Pyrrolidone: So, hows it han... | 4 | 6.5 | |
1404417427 | 1404424983 | t3_29rnek | t5_2to41 | 12 | [deleted]: TIFU by eating popcorn at the movies high
It was actually last night, but anyways. My friends and I went to watch the new transformers movie. We smoked before, and I was at about a 8. My girlfriend bought some popcorn, and of course I immediately went to town on it. I shoved as much in my mouth as I could. A... | 5 | 2.4 | |
1404420445 | 1404429424 | t3_29rsqi | t5_2to41 | 50 | carrotman4: TIFU by using a Bluetooth speaker [nsfw]
So today I came home from a rather exhausting day at work. I greeted my parents and brother briefly before going upstairs to take a shower. After my shower, I went into my room naked, and figured I would relax for a few minutes and watch some porn. I brought up my fa... | 4 | 12.5 | |
1404422949 | 1404700445 | t3_29rx1i | t5_2to41 | 10 | p0tat07: Tifu by trying to shut off a lawn mower
I was at work and I had to weed wack around the ponds. There were a few spots that would have been to difficult to do with a weed wacker. So I go back to the barn and hook up a trailer to my gator and pull out a lawn mower. It starts fine but I released the bale and it d... | 5 | 2 | |
1404421653 | 1404499113 | t3_29ruv1 | t5_2to41 | 47 | worst_troll_evar: TIFU by unknowingly cutting into a vehicular funeral procession, swearing back and forth at one of the mourners for 'blowing a red light'
This happened a few years ago. this is by far the worst thing i have ever done in my life. There is no justification, no excuse, no apology that i feel would ever... | 11 | 4.272727 | |
1404421275 | 1404424359 | t3_29ru6k | t5_2to41 | 15 | LURCHDIUTV: TIFU by making a joke about a co workers truck
Back ground on me, Im notorious at work for being a ball break and dishing out a good joke. All day at work My coworker is showing everyone outside his new truck and he is getting all excited about this. To be honest it was starting to get really annoying. He c... | 3 | 5 | |
1404424571 | 1404429144 | t3_29rzml | t5_2to41 | 20 | Blocktimus_Prime: TIFU: Google translate and I may get my wife fired.
TIFU by talking with my wife while she is at work, and naturally sex came up. I got the bright idea of sending her a naughty message in Spanish: ¿Quieres tener sexo increíble después? Te enviaré al éxtasis con mi poderosa polla!
as in: Want to have ... | 3 | 6.666667 | |
1404426925 | 1404520911 | t3_29s3dr | t5_2to41 | 15 | madd222: TIFU by not disclosing a past misdemeanor during a job background check
I graduated college a few months ago and managed to get my first job offer as a software developer for a large company. I filled out all of the necessary paperwork and was finally completing the info for a 3rd party background check. Being... | 5 | 3 | |
1404427934 | 1404483651 | t3_29s4xq | t5_2to41 | 66 | WhiteShadow92: TIFU by accidentally flirting with my math professor
It needs to be pointed out first that I'm pretty shy and socially awkward. I'm the type of person to say good morning at 2pm when someone says hello.
Anyways, so I am taking a 5 week summer course for intermediate algebra and have this fairly attract... | 3 | 22 | |
1404422657 | 1404441505 | t3_29rwkt | t5_2to41 | 10 | Casclo: TIFU by face-planting on a sand dune
Today I went on a sand dune ride with my brother and sister where you would get driven around on these really big sand dunes. About half way through the trip there was this part where you could get get off for 5-10 minutes to take pictures of view, run around, or whatever on... | 3 | 3.333333 | |
1404437219 | 1404506055 | t3_29s7kp | t5_2to41 | 4,922 | misterob: Excellent, appreciate that. That's the plan! We'll see how it goes. I'll post an edit as soon as I hear back.
EasyOnTheData: We believe in you OP!
DeySeeMeLurkin: I absolutely do not.
Sirsilentbob423: I find your lack of faith disturbing
ONLY_COMMENTS_ON_GW: Dad?
I_Think_Alot: No, this is Patrick.
whatacli... | 11 | 447.454545 | |
1404425829 | 1404445050 | t3_29s1n3 | t5_2to41 | 14 | georgesuckslots: TIFU: The Stuff of Nightmares
Long time listener first time caller.
Monday, I fucked up. I know, it isnt today, but I just got to the point where I could focus on anything for more than a few seconds. I was sitting at my desk at work, and I pulled a mailer out to throw away. The mailer was made out of... | 6 | 2.333333 | |
1404430617 | 1404431948 | t3_29s8u1 | t5_2to41 | 8 | itchcreamthrowaway: TIFU: By over using anti-itch cream. Slightly NSFW
Throwaway for soon to be revealed reasons
Background info: I am a 17 year old high school soon to be senior.
I have never had problems shaving my pubic hair before.
Dear Reddit,
Earlier today I sincerely fucked up. Yesterday morning I decided to s... | 5 | 1.6 | |
1404434250 | 1404464353 | t3_29sdy0 | t5_2to41 | 53 | xRorkes: TIFU By not not kissing the girl of my dreams.
This story is actually from earlier in the year but I have only recently discovered TIFU so please forgive me.
After turning 18 and inheriting some money after my mum passed away I decided I would put it towards traveling the world. My plan was to leave New Zeal... | 3 | 17.666667 | |
1404435559 | 1404573562 | t3_29sfms | t5_2to41 | 627 | thrownawaysadness1: TIFU in light of all the drunk stories, time to confess a 17 year old story. (NSFW) (serious)
Although this happened a lifetime ago, the event seared a permanent wound into my soul, and has contributed to me wanting to end my life pretty much every single day until recently.
*** disclaimer: i am no... | 6 | 104.5 | |
1404436366 | 1404450436 | t3_29sgqn | t5_2to41 | 59 | [deleted]: TIFU by becoming an alcoholic
CkcaeFfoCilquBRdpqwzUQ6WBP0MwFx2UAZTVLvuasjjrBAbgYl3Fs9jxsECk2CkcaeFfoCilquBRdpqwzUQ6WBP0MwFx2UAZTVLvuasjjrBAbgYl3Fs9jxsECk2CkcaeFfoCilquBRdpqwzUQ6WBP0MwFx2UAZTVLvuasjjrBAbgYl3Fs9jxsECk2CkcaeFfoCilquBRdpqwzUQ6WBP0MwFx2UAZTVLvuasjjrBAbgYl3Fs9jxsECk2CkcaeFfoCilquBRdpqwzUQ6WBP0MwFx... | 4 | 14.75 | |
1404436855 | 1404526536 | t3_29shek | t5_2to41 | 15 | supermegadad: TIFU by looking up an ex on Facebook and seeing that she now has a daughter who looks just like me.
I had a relationship with this woman and we broke it off. We ran into each other a few years later when I was married to someone else and so on and so on.
This happened a few more times and it came down to... | 3 | 5 | |
1404438260 | 1404489568 | t3_29sjb6 | t5_2to41 | 62 | holyfuckisnapped: TIFU and beat up a girl from class, may fail math
I flunked the fuck out of math last year, and now I'm stuck in summer school. God, the kids who get summer school are the meanest fuckers, and I'm trapped with them. There's this girl in our class, let's call her Brit. Brit's always trash talking peopl... | 4 | 15.5 | |
1404439393 | 1404532555 | t3_29sksd | t5_2to41 | 24 | bxtk: TIFU by missing every sign.
Let's start with some background information. First of all, today is when it hit me, not when the signs were given. That was years ago. Second of all, I usually give great relationship and social advice, to the extent that people on my HS school bus thought I was a psychic.
But appare... | 10 | 2.4 | |
1404439763 | 1404442198 | t3_29sla7 | t5_2to41 | 3 | spirit_of_vengeance: TIFU by sexting with crush
Handsome_White_Jesus: Bro you gotta tag what's yurs!
spirit_of_vengeance: Thank you Jezus
| 3 | 1 | |
1404440874 | 1404448555 | t3_29smpt | t5_2to41 | 7 | cwbshorty: TIFU by betting my roommate the city fireworks were on the 4th
rzmohno: ... it's the 3rd, dude.
cwbshorty: what are you trying to get at?
rzmohno: She said they are on the 4th.
You bet (presumably against).
They are tonight.
It is the 3rd.
What am I missing here?
cwbshorty: This happened before they starte... | 5 | 1.4 | |
1404439319 | 1404450041 | t3_29skoq | t5_2to41 | 12 | Muwr: TIFU by grabbing a pan.
So, here's to popping my reddit-post cherry! Cheers!
My fuck-up of today -
Preface: Mom made killer meatloaf. I'm not from down South, so I'm not used to cast-iron skillets being used in the oven. It just isn't something widely practiced where I'm from, I guess. (Southern Cali for anyon... | 4 | 3 | |
1404451874 | 1404529054 | t3_29t0dm | t5_2to41 | 11 | jcaits: TIFU by keeping my job
My company just slashed hours to 'optimize sales opportunities'. When this announcement was made, I was on vacation and knew absolutely nothing about what was going on, and couldn't get any answers from anyone in regards to whether come the switch day, I still had hours, when those may be... | 7 | 1.571429 | |
1404454888 | 1404456927 | t3_29t3k0 | t5_2to41 | 4 | 69username69: TIFU by eating eight nectarines in a single sitting
I was just popping them. I ate them and they hated me for it. A few hours later they got their revenge. My asshole burns and I'm reposting this because a moment ago I posted "Today I fucked up" instead of TIFU.
DETRITUS_TROLL: Your colon thanks you.
Edi... | 7 | 0.571429 | |
1404458680 | 1404468490 | t3_29t791 | t5_2to41 | 11 | MarkNutt1218: TIFU by letting my dream girl know I love her.
So here's what happend.
A while back I met my dream girl. Buetiful, athletic, nerdy, Literaly a girl version of me. So we became friends and all is well in the universe. Slowly as we hung out I fell for her, blah blah you know how it goes. So once I finally... | 4 | 2.75 | |
1404462124 | 1404463956 | t3_29ta6a | t5_2to41 | 8 | [deleted]: TIFU by erasing a meme entry on Know your meme
5 months ago, I submitted a meme entry titled 'I hate my job'. It garnered 18,000 views and is being researched.
Yesterday I wanted to write a new meme entry (from the show Darkplace, remember 'Central Park can be very dangerous at night'?)
It had been a long ... | 6 | 1.333333 | |
1404461473 | 1404501092 | t3_29t9n2 | t5_2to41 | 68 | [deleted]: TIFU by accidentally typing youporn.com instead of youtube.com when my GF's mom was right next to me.
I was trying to show my GF's mom a funny video on youtube but my fucking muscle memory typed in youporn.com on the url instead. I exited out as fast as I could but it was already too late and the damage was ... | 5 | 13.6 | |
1404465086 | 1404616826 | t3_29tcgj | t5_2to41 | 235 | [deleted]: TIFU by getting a blowjob
So I had the house to myself today and thought I'd kick it with my gf. We're just chilling and one thing leads to another. She starts taking off my pants when she reaches into her pocket and pulls out those dissolvable Listerine strips. She pops one of those in her mouth and then pr... | 6 | 39.166667 | |
1404467954 | 1404468283 | t3_29tepu | t5_2to41 | 14 | [deleted]: TIFU by stalking a girl on Facebook that I was meeting the next day
I must have relived this situation a million times in my head since, cringing every single time. It's horrible.
So about two weeks ago I'm randomly teamed up for a group Uni project with a few other people. It's just me, 2 other guys, and a... | 3 | 4.666667 | |
1404468448 | 1404501561 | t3_29tf3f | t5_2to41 | 137 | ImmaRussian: TIFU by buying potatoes.
At work today we ran out of potatoes. My boss asked me if I had a vehicle; I told him I did, so he gave me forty dollars and asked me to run down to the store and buy 80 count potatoes. Alright, I can do that. He said they should be "About that big, nothing too huge", and he said i... | 8 | 17.125 | |
1404471680 | 1404521728 | t3_29thr2 | t5_2to41 | 45 | idamnedit: TIFU: By trusting my manager
I am a devops engineer contractor. I basically get assigned to a project and get paid for the hours I work. Most projects are 40 hours a week. So, if you finish your 40 hours in 4 days you get the 5th day off. Sometimes projects give you extrended work weeks where you can do ... | 5 | 9 | |
1404457735 | 1404495057 | t3_29t6cl | t5_2to41 | 14 | i_forgot_my_towel: TIFU by eating baby food
Ok, technically this was a few days ago, and may actually be two separate fuck ups in one.
So at some point in the last few weeks, I bought my toddler those over-priced little Gerbers puff snack things. He like them, so I figured I'd grab a few more containers when I wound u... | 3 | 4.666667 | |
1404471613 | 1404523197 | t3_29thp3 | t5_2to41 | 38 | Patch3y: TIFU by accidentally showing my best friend my Dick.
We were jamming to some tunes we were working on, him on Guitar and myself on the Drums.
He told me he came up with a riff that would blow my shorts off. He played it and I immediately jumped up and ripped my shorts down...however I was wearing slightly loo... | 4 | 9.5 |
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