start_date stringlengths 10 10 | end_date stringlengths 10 10 | thread_id stringlengths 8 10 ⌀ | subreddit stringclasses 1
value | subreddit_id stringclasses 1
value | total_score int64 -564 194k | text stringlengths 52 58.9k | num_messages int64 3 160 | avg_score float64 -55.17 14.3k |
|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|
1404649819 | 1404655515 | t3_29ypme | t5_2to41 | 195 | Beatoffbandit: TIFU, By beating off in front of the police.
Not today, but a few years ago. I had just graduated college and started an internship in a new city. I was subletting a friends apartment for the time being. It was a Monday and the guys at work wanted to grab some beers so naturally I went along. Strong ... | 7 | 27.857143 | |
1404655003 | 1404720209 | t3_29ytxn | t5_2to41 | 1,680 | ForgottenPhenom: TIFU by sending a dirty snapchat...
**SEE EDITS TO FIGURE OUT WHAT HAPPENED** Well this happened last night. I wasn't drunk or anything, but it was very late. (Technically this morning -3 am) and I was playing xbox. Of course, what everyone does at 3 am!
So anyway this girl and I were exchanging nude... | 22 | 76.363636 | |
1404656681 | 1404679050 | t3_29yvou | t5_2to41 | 717 | stephrockith: TIFU making homemade caramel [NSFW]
http://i.imgur.com/vmXjicN.jpg
Today I was trying to make homemade caramel as topping for a samoa cheesecake. While pulling the bowl out of the microwave, it slipped out of my hands and dumped boiling sugar all over my arm and leg. Burns on my leg are deep 2nd degree a... | 8 | 89.625 | |
1404662484 | 1404663085 | t3_29z2wy | t5_2to41 | 5 | JosephHowards: TIFU By being honest as heck 0.0
This happened about 1 week after i broke up with my gf.
--Intro--
For about 6 months i was attracted by a particular girl i sat next to in class, classy girl, pretty cute face, really smart - which i really liked, she was my type exactly but i hadn't realized it at tha... | 4 | 1.25 | |
1404656818 | 1404682886 | t3_29yvu8 | t5_2to41 | 66 | mynameisj3sus: TIFU by having sex with my girlfriend while sick
So yesterday I took a trip to the Dr's to see my doc about my knee. As they were taking my vitals and all my temperature showed up as 101 degrees. I just thought it was just hot as balls outside and it was nothing to worry about. However my throat was hurt... | 5 | 13.2 | |
1404664588 | 1404665649 | t3_29z5np | t5_2to41 | 7 | [deleted]: TIFU by finding my math teacher's instagram account in which she has pictures of being a slut
Today I was going through instagram and I ran across a username which basically said they puffed pot everyday. I looked at the profile and I find pictures of my math teacher shooting shotguns and drinking beer with ... | 5 | 1.4 | |
1404666731 | 1404718397 | t3_29z8jn | t5_2to41 | 24 | Trubs_D: TIFU by telling my boyfriend I have been faking for years.
Its as bad as it sounds. It happened maybe 4 months ago. I only did it because I know I cant get off and Im tired of having to put on act during sex. I thought he would be happy that Im telling him my darkest embarrassing secret but all he could screa... | 12 | 2 | |
1404666485 | 1404696618 | t3_29z880 | t5_2to41 | 9 | [deleted]: TIFU by using my phone near the stairwell
long story short.. i was browsing some GW when my phone slipped out of my hands and fell down the stairs. At the time my parents had guests over, and they happened to be downstairs where the phone landed..
KrisGroovin: What's GW?
MontanoAlan77: It's a sub Reddit basi... | 3 | 3 | |
1404668078 | 1404732267 | t3_29zai3 | t5_2to41 | 11 | destortoise: TIFU by staying out too late and hearing my friends have sex in the bathroom
So I'm in the city for the weekend of independence day etc and last night was the last night that I'd be here. It was a great night we bar hopped different places and even ended up at a sick live jazz bar. But it all went down hil... | 4 | 2.75 | |
1404668495 | 1404710362 | t3_29zb2w | t5_2to41 | 19 | [deleted]: TIFU by pulling a shotgun on a retarded child.
First, I want to start of with the fact that he was alone, so no, I'm not getting into any legal trouble.
Alright, so [Paul](http://imgur.com/a/B301d) likes to sit in the window, just like my other cats. Typically, Paul enjoys being a pain in the ass.
*You kno... | 6 | 3.166667 | |
1404670052 | 1404685619 | t3_29zd9y | t5_2to41 | 3 | MsBusty: TIFU by not checking first
1minuteman: use the shower.
MsBusty: Downstairs in the half bath. No showy in this one.
| 3 | 1 | |
1404673830 | 1404740242 | t3_29zitn | t5_2to41 | 69 | ButtProphet: TIFU by sending a dick pic to my wife.
This happened yesterday but still holds as a major fuck up.
My wife and I are new parents so sexy time is much harder to come by. Well a couple nights ago my wife was hinting about getting some time in after she got our son to sleep. She grabbed my junk kissed me and... | 5 | 13.8 | |
1404673396 | 1404762616 | t3_29zi4m | t5_2to41 | 8 | VoidInsanity: TIFU : Because I am a near emotionless arsehole
Not sure if this is an /r/offmychest or a /r/TIFU, its a mix of both really. Rule 2 is to provide context, so here it is.
I really hate myself when this happens, I really do. More so than I do when nothing happens. Ever heard the phrase if you got nothing n... | 9 | 0.888889 | |
1404674820 | 1404720530 | t3_29zk97 | t5_2to41 | 50 | anusplaythrowaway: TIFU by stinking up my wife's vibrator with my own ass. [NSFW]
I got a rare impulse today while the wife was away to seek out anal pleasures, and her vibrator collection included one that didnt seem too ambitious. So, I went for it. Afterwards, I immediately remembered why I haven't done that kind of... | 7 | 7.142857 | |
1404675693 | 1404677254 | t3_29zli9 | t5_2to41 | 4 | [deleted]: TIFU by kissing the girl I like
A little backstory first.
Earlier this week on Sunday evening I went to hangout with a good friend of mine (we will call him M). He was going to pick me up and we were going to go out and get some ice cream. He mentioned the fact that was bringing his friend (we will call he... | 5 | 0.8 | |
1404675693 | 1405992482 | t3_29zlia | t5_2to41 | 60 | [deleted]: TIFU by downloading my first, and last, porn. [NSFW]
Oh god is all I have to say.
This morning my husband and I received a message from my grandfather saying that he received a copy write infringement letter from our ISP and to stop whatever we were doing immediately.
Little back story: we've been living ... | 5 | 12 | |
1404675047 | 1404718251 | t3_29zkks | t5_2to41 | 58 | camcamman7: tifu by getting drunk and jacking off onto hotel curtains [nsfw]
So to celebrate our high school graduation my friends and I went on an all inclusive trip to the Dominican Republic. We met a fellow American there who was a much more seasoned drinker and pushed us well beyond our limits.
As the night went ... | 7 | 8.285714 | |
1404677217 | 1404717062 | t3_29znq3 | t5_2to41 | 12 | PineappleAssGrenade: TIFU By ordering bondage gear off of Amazon. Probably [NSFW]
Today I was feeling extra adventurous, and decided that it was time to supplement my collection of BDSM gear. I usually just go into shops, and buy them there just so I can look people in the eye while I'm buying it, but today I decided t... | 5 | 2.4 | |
1404676808 | 1404686661 | t3_29zn4w | t5_2to41 | 23 | beerchocolatewaffles: TIFU by falling for a married pole-dancing model.
This didn't happen today but a few years earlier. A few years ago I was on a holiday in Turkey with my parents, sisters and a bunch of my parents’ friends. It was a nice all-in resort and the first few days were fun, but I quickly became bored of l... | 3 | 7.666667 | |
1404678522 | 1404749019 | t3_29zplm | t5_2to41 | 344 | hashbrownsnbacon: TIFU by maxing out my bf's 6GB data plan
TIFU by maxing out my bf's 6GB data plan within the first few days of his new billing cycle. He was over at my place and turned on tethering since my internet was too slow. My laptop decided to hop on his faster network rather than use the one it was supposed t... | 10 | 34.4 | |
1404680279 | 1404684111 | t3_29zs4v | t5_2to41 | 9 | TschussSchlampe: TIFU multiple times.
I wake up, eat breakfast, pretty much a normal day. Then I randomly run into a door, which gives me a lovely bump right in the middle of my forehead and a decent headache. I'm normally not a very clumsy person, but today, for whatever reason, my body decided to spaz out at every c... | 3 | 3 | |
1404681352 | 1404751993 | t3_29ztp4 | t5_2to41 | 113 | ChrisBabyYea: TIFU by being alone in a gym.
I work out at a hospital gym. It usually caters to old people and people in physical therapy, so the weight area is usually fairly empty. I'm a big introvert so I love it. Plus, it's only five minutes from my house.
I was in there today (Sunday). It's only open from 1-5, and... | 8 | 14.125 | |
1404674840 | 1404737806 | t3_29zka6 | t5_2to41 | 31 | [deleted]: TIFU- by slapping a special needs man in the back of the head
So a bit of back story me and my friend at work (retail supermarket) are so bored at work that we have challenged each other to cause the most pain to each other as posable.
Today i was stacking boxes and he swiped my legs away going ass over hea... | 6 | 5.166667 | |
1404680399 | 1404691069 | t3_29zsb6 | t5_2to41 | 16 | crazylighter: TIFU: By trying to make a "simple" supper so I can get out the door in time
TIFU... I went to make a simple supper of pancakes, OJ, scrambled eggs and grapes for supper at 5, thinking I had plenty of time to eat it and get out the door by 5:30. What could possibly go wrong?
First, I needed a recipe to ma... | 3 | 5.333333 | |
1404681910 | 1404684514 | t3_29zugw | t5_2to41 | 3 | [deleted]: TIFU by pissing off a disabled veteran (I think)
huF7EoMCDYvuyI5DWn5ectfEg5vtKx8YXFaNFJcHqFwXqp0fU70wgmv6K67P1ahuF7EoMCDYvuyI5DWn5ectfEg5vtKx8YXFaNFJcHqFwXqp0fU70wgmv6K67P1ahuF7EoMCDYvuyI5DWn5ectfEg5vtKx8YXFaNFJcHqFwXqp0fU70wgmv6K67P1ahuF7EoMCDYvuyI5DWn5ectfEg5vtKx8YXFaNFJcHqFwXqp0fU70wgmv6K67P1ahuF7EoMCDYvu... | 3 | 1 | |
1404679585 | 1404775871 | t3_29zr3l | t5_2to41 | 6 | [deleted]: TIFU by being ultra beta when it comes to girls.
This actually happened a couple years ago during school on three separate occasions.
During my sophomore year, I liked this one cute Asian girl in my math class. Never having a girlfriend before, I had no idea what I was doing. One day during class, I just w... | 6 | 1 | |
1404683789 | 1404688521 | t3_29zx87 | t5_2to41 | 41 | deasphodel: TIFU by taking a break from moving
Today I was packing boxes to move into my new house which I'm doing at the end of the month and seeing that I have a limited surface areas, I was putting a crate on my bed and filling it with all my stuff. It's important to note that I am a student at university studying c... | 3 | 13.666667 | |
1404684835 | 1404733181 | t3_29zyra | t5_2to41 | 2,881 | CenturiesChild: TIFU by getting my own semen all over my fathers hands
This was a few months ago, but it's one of the most horrendous things to ever happen to me. It's just a really fucking strange series of events, and it makes me feel quite sick.
I was lying on my bed reading, and I was ill with some mysterious stom... | 11 | 261.909091 | |
1404687694 | 1404690502 | t3_2a030z | t5_2to41 | 6 | [deleted]: TIFU cycling after having a taco night
kinda_alone: Hi,
Your submission has been removed. It would be more appropriate for I Shat Myself Saturday. Please repost then.
Teotwawki69: TIL that "I Shat Myself Saturday" is a thing...
| 3 | 2 | |
1404687364 | 1404758255 | t3_2a02ii | t5_2to41 | 20 | keiblerclown: TIFU by sending my phone to a watery death and losing two hours of pay at work
This was actually last week, and was a sequence of events that lead to one really bad night.
Last Wednesday, I was over at my buddy's place to swim laps in his pool. Trying to get in shape and whatnot. I always keep my phone w... | 4 | 5 | |
1404693402 | 1404701634 | t3_2a0b2g | t5_2to41 | 6 | moezib: TIFU by damaging my neighbor's property.
So for the summer I've been working at a country club as a caddie. I never liked golf before but I've gotten more and more into it every time I finish caddying an 18 hole. Today we were cleaning out the attic and found my uncle's old golf bag along with clubs, balls and... | 4 | 1.5 | |
1404694813 | 1404704661 | t3_2a0d0h | t5_2to41 | 7 | unborncentaur: TIFU my losing my GFs longboard.
I have borrowed my girlfriends longboard many times and its nothing out of the ordinary. But last night something happened. I rode the board to a friends house for a bbq and adequate drinking. Once I got there I placed the board under a table and left it there for the nig... | 7 | 1 | |
1404695860 | 1404762441 | t3_2a0ehu | t5_2to41 | 18 | [deleted]: TIFU by accidentally sending the guy im interested in the weird porn I was watching
While talking to my guy friend, who I am indeed interested in, I started browsing 4chan. We usually send eachother links to random stuff and make witty comments and share stories to pass time. We tend to avoid sending eachoth... | 4 | 4.5 | |
1404696428 | 1404796693 | t3_2a0fad | t5_2to41 | 453 | gviscuit: TIFU by masturbating in the wrong bathroom
This summer I'm living with a guy who is a good friend, his brother and a girl who goes to our college but we didn't know that well when we moved in together. We've been living together for about a month now and the girl turned out to be a little high strung and bitc... | 7 | 64.714286 | |
1404695373 | 1404737955 | t3_2a0dtb | t5_2to41 | 6 | DeeFeDee: TIFU by leaving Reddit open on something NSFW
I let my dad use my IPad while (kind of NSFW) [this] (http://www.reddit.com/r/tifu/comments/29p8bu/tifu_by_not_pissing_before_ultrasound/) was open. He was using the safari so I know for sure he saw it. I'm expecting him to ask me why I was reading about someone's... | 3 | 2 | |
1404703866 | 1404754067 | t3_2a0jwo | t5_2to41 | 5 | sellyberry: You may have puked more and just don't remember, I wouldn't be surprised if they gave you charcoal and stuff at the hospital to help you recover.
Thinc_Ng_Kap: I guess you're forgetting about those superpowers young adults possess in having the ability not to get hungover.
sellyberry: Oh yeah, I'm old now ... | 3 | 1.666667 | |
1404700314 | 1404755763 | t3_2a0kpx | t5_2to41 | 40 | spayandneuterem: tifu by wet dreaming on my cat
throwaway account guys, I'm not proud
so I've been feeling kinda lonely the last couple of months, my girl of 4 years left me in february and i just haven't been the same since.
so last night when i went to sleep, i began have a seriously horny dream. it was me and this... | 4 | 10 | |
1404700163 | 1405046375 | t3_2a0kig | t5_2to41 | 8 | stickyshoyu: TIFU by trying to give my boyfriend kisses.
It happend 20min ago.
Well he was super excited over the all stars voting on the MLB website, being a huge Rizzo fan he put in a ton of votes and I helped him. Soon it was cuddle time and he started to get frisky(mind you, it's been a couple of weeks since the ... | 5 | 1.6 | |
1404701876 | 1404757153 | t3_2a0m3i | t5_2to41 | 178 | edit-smile: LET'S HOPE HE NEVER CLICKED ON THE THUMB NAILS
willystylee: It may not be all that bad. Remember, he's old. You know already that old people and technology don't mix. Its very possible he has no idea how to get to that folder in the first place. Plus, how would he know those pics were of you even if he sa... | 8 | 22.25 | |
1404698908 | 1404762354 | t3_2a0iqt | t5_2to41 | 111 | whattt9: TIFU by doing pcp and mushrooms
Fuck my fucking life.
Last night me and my gf had the genius idea of buying drugs from a friend who outed himself as a dealer.
So we did some research and decided to buy 150$ worth of pcp and mushrooms. Unbeknownst to us you dont do them in combination....
I ate the first mus... | 4 | 27.75 | |
1404702525 | 1404759315 | t3_2a0nta | t5_2to41 | 171 | totesmagotess: TIFU by sticking a dildo up my ass..
So let me start off that I am male in his early 20s and I am straight but just like to experiment.
So I have always been kind of curious about anal play since I have read that it feels great to have your prostate stimulated it. So as I was in my girlfriends house, ... | 6 | 28.5 | |
1404701605 | 1404706443 | t3_2a0mh9 | t5_2to41 | 19 | InadequateUsername: TIFU by lying in my first ever job interview.
I had an interview for a job at McDonalds and was incredibly nervous as I had aced the first ever interview and would really like a summer job to pay for college so I didn't want to screw things up. Before the interview I had done my due diligence by res... | 6 | 3.166667 | |
1404704422 | 1404706968 | t3_2a0qhj | t5_2to41 | 46 | TheOptimismOpossum: TIFU by trying to spice up my love life
Here was the plan:
I buy a super sexy lingerie outfit to wear when I visited my long-distance boyfriend when I went to visit him this week. I would excuse myself to the bathroom before bed, slip the sexywear on under my robe, and return. After a seductive, w... | 8 | 5.75 | |
1404706251 | 1404743701 | t3_2a0svn | t5_2to41 | 15 | Donut_Dick: TIFU By using a newly purchased Penis-Pump a little too much.
Forewarning, I understand I deserve this for going in to it with no research.
Long story short I used a cock pump for some pickle hiding with the lady, kept it pressurized for roughly 30-45 minutes wonderful gains were had about 1.75" - 2" ext... | 7 | 2.142857 | |
1404707937 | 1404732621 | t3_2a0uz0 | t5_2to41 | 67 | [deleted]: TIFU by giving my boyfriend a blow job
This was just the other day on 4th of July night. My boyfriend and I are both in the Coast Guard except I am in the reserves and he is active duty. He is on a boat currently in dry dock and I am at a completely separate unit. For the 4th his cutter decided to let the cr... | 8 | 8.375 | |
1404700347 | 1404715825 | t3_2a0kr8 | t5_2to41 | 43 | joefrantel: TIFU by not understanding Snapchat stories
So, this is actually my roommate's fuck-up, but it's too good not to share. At our 4th of July party, it's pretty late and we're all pretty drunk. We've been on a kick of enjoying the [Fuck Her Right In The Pussy guy](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CdIT74L8hGI) re... | 3 | 14.333333 | |
1404710290 | 1404824849 | t3_2a0xss | t5_2to41 | 60 | FierceDeity96: TIFU by reading my girlfriend's and her ex-boyfriend's Facebook messages
So it's 1:25 AM June 7th, 2014.
I'm a pretty happy person and I trust most of my friends and especially my girlfriend, however I just spent the last 30 minutes of my night reading her and her ex-boyfriend's Facebook messages. I was... | 8 | 7.5 | |
1404697412 | 1404750036 | t3_2a0gm8 | t5_2to41 | 12 | mickythesmelly: TIFU by making a joke about germany beating france in the world cup
I work at a pool as a lifeguard a little ways away from where I live and I happened to be working at the gate signing guests in (it's a private pool) and a family comes up to me. Nothing out of the ordinary mom and dad and two little bo... | 5 | 2.4 | |
1404708693 | 1404746371 | t3_2a0vvj | t5_2to41 | 15 | somewhereifoundyou: TIFU by pocket dialing
I have been seeing this girl for about a month or so. Things have been going okay. Well today we are supposed to hang out, but she bails. This starts the beginning of the end. She says,"things are just wierd and she doesn't know what to do." I not being certain what she is ta... | 5 | 3 | |
1404697406 | 1404729830 | t3_2a0glv | t5_2to41 | 11 | Pillow_monster: tifu by getting to far ahead of myself
Last night i had some friends over and we did a lot of partying and drinking. one of the girls that came over im starting to crush for a little bit. Anyways bedtime came along so i went to bed. She came in and i asked if she wanted to lay down with me. She accepted... | 3 | 3.666667 | |
1404711011 | 1404779534 | t3_2a0ynd | t5_2to41 | 15 | [deleted]: TIFU by asking a girl to blow me in front of co-workers
So this actually happened last summer but I relive whenever I talk to girls. I worked at a pool, and if the weather isn't the best all 20 workers generally sit cramped on these two park tables in the middle of the deck.
So its rainy (of course) and I ... | 6 | 2.5 | |
1404712006 | 1404712942 | t3_2a0zp5 | t5_2to41 | 2 | [deleted]: TIFU By emptying my spam folder
enforcerupu2: Just edit the ad asking people to re-send.
CochinBrahmaLover: I did, and I renewed it. But this goddamn pig is eating so much. I planned on keeping her for another 2-3 months, but cannot afford it.
| 3 | 0.666667 | |
1404712820 | 1404770675 | t3_2a10kb | t5_2to41 | 60 | _Tripp_: TIFU by stabbing my balls with a wire
This just happened. Today I bought a new set of strings for my guitar. I restrung my guitar, and it sounded fantastic. Great. So I clip the strings at the end and throw the ends into the trash. Fast forward to now. I just shed my clothes because I sleep naked, and tossed m... | 4 | 15 | |
1404714025 | 1404724203 | t3_2a11sm | t5_2to41 | 11 | Blast2TheGhast: TIFU by hanging out with "That one friend"
This happened about a week ago when I was with a few friends. We went to this sleazy as fuck bar a couple streets away from my friend's house. So, I was elected designated driver, because I wasn't drinking that night because I just finished clearing from a wond... | 7 | 1.571429 | |
1404704287 | 1404771527 | t3_2a0qb6 | t5_2to41 | 62 | [deleted]: TIFU by not admitting that I just needed a few minutes before Skyping [nsfw language and content]
**TL;DR: I unleashed an unholy explosion of diarrhea within the sight and earshot of a girl who was willingly taking her clothes off on camera for me.**
***UPDATE:*** **So, my girl finally texted me back. Turns... | 3 | 20.666667 | |
1404716143 | 1404753486 | t3_2a13s5 | t5_2to41 | 234 | [deleted]: TIFU by watching SpongeBob
[deleted]: thats not a fuck up. thats success!
Dransik: Gf was not impressed
Matt2310: tell her to hop on the deck and flop like a fish
hybridman: Absorbant and yellow and porus is she?
Matt2310: i can only imagine the amount of acid/ mushrooms the guys were on while making this s... | 7 | 33.428571 | |
1404719220 | 1404721274 | t3_2a16ks | t5_2to41 | 14 | [deleted]: TIFU by throwing away 500 dollars.
This happened a couple of years ago. Just discovered this subreddit, so I figured this story would be enjoyed here.
I decided to go out and buy a new car. The dealership had a promo where, after you bought your car, you spun a roulette wheel on their computer and won a p... | 4 | 3.5 | |
1404720260 | 1404844824 | t3_2a17hq | t5_2to41 | 51 | Random_Expletive: TIFU by sending a nude to my conservative best friend
This actually happened a few nights ago, but I only discovered the true horror of what I did today.
Well first off all I love sex. I have a lot of casual sex, and at the moment I've found this really, really great partner. He's kinky, fun and all ... | 11 | 4.636364 | |
1404720148 | 1404730799 | t3_2a17e5 | t5_2to41 | 17 | Taylosaurus: TIFU by being honest while cuddling
So I've been talking to this girl for a couple of months. We have similar pasts, we share many common interests, and we get along well. I like her. Tonight I was pretty buzzed and she wanted me to come over. I did and brought some whiskey for me, and beer for her. We tal... | 3 | 5.666667 | |
1404723138 | 1404728555 | t3_2a19p3 | t5_2to41 | 14 | [deleted]: Tifu by punching a hole in the wall after giving my retarded brother alcohol.
Tifu, I'm 27 live at home with my mother to help her out after breast cancer. I also have a dad with a broken back alcoholic (separated), a 23 year old brother with autism/aspergers and a 15 year type 1 diabetic who gets sick and ... | 3 | 4.666667 | |
1404724506 | 1404834742 | t3_2a1apm | t5_2to41 | 9 | [deleted]: TIFU by pissing in a bottle
So I'm on vacation at my Dad's house and so I'm staying in my brothers room so I have a good wank at 4:00 but need to pee so bad. The problem is the bathroom is right by my dad's door and he is a very light sleeper. So I search the room to find a bottle and find a dasani water bot... | 5 | 1.8 | |
1404723107 | 1404775905 | t3_2a19o8 | t5_2to41 | 4,898 | spacevomit: TIFU by meeting my Girlfriends brother for the first time.
I was at my girlfriends family home for the first time and no one was home, after a while of hanging out things starting getting a bit frisky between us, eventually i started finger bangin' her. This is where things got interesting. Half way through... | 13 | 376.769231 | |
1404726365 | 1404726830 | t3_2a1c6u | t5_2to41 | 7 | Lewitje: TIFU by leaving my key in the door
**Context**
Me and my bf just moved into a new apartment on the 5th floor and we have one of those doors that you can't open if there's a key in the other side.
**The story**
So me and my bf are leaving the apartment to put some mail in the mailbox which is just across th... | 3 | 2.333333 | |
1404727868 | 1404740463 | t3_2a1ddq | t5_2to41 | 4 | LongLiveBacon: TIFU by washing my hands with shampoo.
To start off, I am lazy. It's too much work to, y'know, get more soap. So instead, I used a thing of Pantene sitting beside the sink. Well, I did this before I went into my room to pull another all nighter (I am afraid that a ghost will attack me, another story.)
... | 4 | 1 | |
1404724187 | 1404785845 | t3_2a1ahf | t5_2to41 | 79 | BabyEatingSerhant: TIFU by schorching my insides!
This horrible mistake happened an hour ago. I woke up this morning feeling a bit sleepy and thought, "hey, there's a coffee shop down the road, I'll go and get an espresso." and so I do. Like any other time I've drank an espresso, it was relatively drinkable, and so as ... | 6 | 13.166667 | |
1404730757 | 1404761584 | t3_2a1fq6 | t5_2to41 | 69 | ninjajandal: TIFU by sleeping in.
It's term break here, a two week holiday for school kids. I woke up to my alarm this morning, dragged myself to the kitchen and threw cereal in the direction of my 4 and 6 year olds. They asked if they could watch cartoons and I said sure, I'm going back to bed, just eat your breakfast... | 7 | 9.857143 | |
1404734701 | 1404790559 | t3_2a1jc0 | t5_2to41 | 767 | TripleFFF: TIFU by breathing my own piss :C
It was a beautiful summers eve and my friends and I were hanging out at the local beach park, barbecueing and drinking.
Night started falling, so we build a small campfire and continue our drinking under the stars. It was a gorgeous night, spirits are high, the view from the... | 7 | 109.571429 | |
1404733592 | 1404797437 | t3_2a1i9x | t5_2to41 | 410 | hasny: TIFU by sleeping with my girlfriend's mom
For the holiday weekend my gf and I took a trip to her mom's place where a rowdy party was thrown. The mom is a straight-up cougar. 40-something yrs old, hard, tanned body (better than her daughters tbh), single and quite obviously ready to mingle. Maybe that's why she t... | 7 | 58.571429 | |
1404736616 | 1404757195 | t3_2a1lc6 | t5_2to41 | 153 | unflavored: TIFU by being too comfortable in my dreams.
I used to be interested in lucid dreaming but I could never really achieve it. However, I did develop a kind of consciousness while dreaming. This is where I fuck up. Whenever im dreaming I know im dreaming and just kind of watch myself. Today I had a very pleasan... | 7 | 21.857143 | |
1404724989 | 1404758635 | t3_2a1b4i | t5_2to41 | 3 | jonathan88876: TIFU by counter-recruiting for my school's football program
I was at a party, quite high, when I ran into this kid who's a 3 star offensive guard who's getting recruited to my school. When he first said, "I got an offer from Temple" I interjected with "Don't go there, dude. It's a basketball school in th... | 3 | 1 | |
1404738102 | 1404808887 | t3_2a1myg | t5_2to41 | 3 | xzexua: TIFU by trying to light 5 sparklers at once.
So, on the fourth of July, we had the standard fireworks and sparklers planned. Knowing this, I decided to stay sober. Apparently, this time, that wouldn't be enough to prevent me from making an incredibly stupid decision. As I broke out the sparklers, I had a long... | 3 | 1 | |
1404739752 | 1404746057 | t3_2a1ozn | t5_2to41 | 11 | PM_ME_UR_SOMETHING: TIFU by flipping over my office chait
So I'm interning with a company for my second year, and I got an office with a computer (from which I'm currently posting this) which last year was occupied by a guy who quit. So I get out of my chair, and I notice a screw fell out. No problem, I flip the chair ... | 7 | 1.571429 | |
1404736064 | 1404747318 | t3_2a1kq0 | t5_2to41 | 28 | [deleted]: TIFU by introducing my mother to porn bloopers.
This happened yesterday, but it's monday morning, and I've never been so thankful to be at work right now, and I really don't wanna go home... Ever.
So anyway, bit of background info. A couple of my friends occasionally link me to videos of porn bloopers which... | 4 | 7 | |
1404740799 | 1404773181 | t3_2a1qae | t5_2to41 | 21 | [deleted]: TIFU by not wiping my ass.
A LITTLE BACKSTORY:
My Grandma owns a cleaning service. She usually calls my parents and ask them if they'd like a cleaning for free, and knowing my mom she always says yes. They usually clean my downstairs room, which consists of my computer, tv, xbox, drums and all that jazz.
TH... | 6 | 3.5 | |
1404705262 | 1404753426 | t3_2a0rk6 | t5_2to41 | 9 | bigbadbitches: TIFU by pissing at work
TIFU by pissing at work. I work on an assembly line in a factory that makes doors, I work a machine that cuts parts and i'm not supposed to leave my machine until the entirety of an order has been cut. it was about 3:45 pm. and the factory shut down is at 4 o'clock, I had drank ab... | 3 | 3 | |
1404742159 | 1404886088 | t3_2a1s6a | t5_2to41 | 4 | Foreigncarwhipper: Tifu by not doing well on my AP us history exam
Tifu when i recieved my ap exam scores after waiting roughly 2 months and they were not what I was expecting. I took ap chem, ap english language and comp, and ap us history. So after praying for the past 2 weeks and doing lots of dua (more prayer), I a... | 5 | 0.8 | |
1404722159 | 1404769776 | t3_2a18zt | t5_2to41 | 6 | Lenoh: TIFU by eating food at a quinceñera
*tl;dr I over-Scovilled my lips and they still feel waxy*
So I'm doing a security gig at a quinceñera (I'm a rent-a-cop, yes I know. A job's a job. Also the birthday girl looked really good, she'll be quite a catch for some dude!) and about 3 hours in, I get a rumbly in the o... | 3 | 2 | |
1404742263 | 1404747358 | t3_2a1sby | t5_2to41 | 31 | [deleted]: TIFU - By getting really drunk and ruining something that had potential to be awesome.
**BACK STORY:** This occurred on the 4th. I went to a BBQ at a girls place that I have been hooking up / kinda seeing. It is still early on so I don't know where it stands/stood at this point. The entire crowd consisted o... | 3 | 10.333333 | |
1404747323 | 1404796320 | t3_2a206q | t5_2to41 | 9 | [deleted]: TIFU by downloading pornography at my parents house (NSFW)
I am 20 years old, employed and living on my own. Although I pay my own bills, I still spend a lot of time with my family. My parents house is ten minutes away from my apartment, and I like to do my laundry there and still eat over a lot. I also do... | 3 | 3 | |
1404692755 | 1404772859 | t3_2a0a6u | t5_2to41 | 6 | heartbrokenlamas: TIFU by playing in the water at the beach
Ok, so I was at the beach with my brother and his friend doing beach stuff. Playing in the sand, collecting shells , splashing in the water. Then we had the idea of sitting in the ocean and be pushed back to shore by the waves. As I was being pushed back to th... | 3 | 2 | |
1404748221 | 1404749445 | t3_2a21ng | t5_2to41 | 3 | [deleted]: TIFU by jacking off while waiting for my noodles to cook.
I woke up around 11AM after a long night, and I realized I was the only one home. I had a huge craving for pasta so I went to my kitchen and whipped out a pot and put some fresh Penne in it, and I started to boil it. My hunger was off the charts and I... | 3 | 1 | |
1404748414 | 1404749331 | t3_2a21z3 | t5_2to41 | 5 | Wahnsinnn: TIFU by emailing a potentially offensive message to coworkers.
So I've been at my job for roughly 8 months now and have a good group of friends in my little "area". We've all got similar senses of humour, but this isn't exactly what I had planned.
Basically I emailed 2 coworkers a photo of that
[MFW Amer... | 3 | 1.666667 | |
1404750416 | 1404752594 | t3_2a25jr | t5_2to41 | 12 | SugarSpiceMarshMelow: TIFU by telling my husband my weird fetishes and actually doing it
I have always had weird fetishes and I realized that reddit is the best place for me to say this. Since I started dating my then boyfriend now husband I have alwayst tried to beg him to allow me to shit together with him. Not only ... | 4 | 3 | |
1404693754 | 1404792361 | t3_2a0bmc | t5_2to41 | 4 | KepHart: TIFU by adjusting a screen and needing new drywall
The air conditioner was in the window and the screen wasn't all the way to the top. So I opened the top window and fixed the screen. When I closed the window, it pulled the bottom half up, releasing my air conditioner from the second floor onto the brick patio... | 3 | 1.333333 | |
1404750484 | 1404829855 | t3_2a25oi | t5_2to41 | 203 | [deleted]: TIFU by thinking I was home alone and furiously masturbating. For a couple hours.
So, I'm off work today, and when I woke up this morning, I assumed I was home alone as I took this day off to be alone and my fiancé and my mother knew that. (Work has been extremely stressful, fiancé and I are staying here to ... | 6 | 33.833333 | |
1404752623 | 1404958378 | t3_2a29ic | t5_2to41 | 172 | loranmcgee: TIFU by walking into a glass door
I came home fairly late from work today and I haven't had anything left in my fridge, so I decided to eat something at a local fast food place (think McDonalds, but smaller, more local, and with schnitzel instead of burgers). It's summer here in Austria, and said fast food ... | 8 | 21.5 | |
1404753056 | 1404789554 | t3_2a2a9n | t5_2to41 | 163 | Dannymaxload: TIFU- By Going to College Orientation
I'm a 18 year old male about to start my freshman year at college. The school that I am attending has a 3day/2night orientation for students to socialize and understand the college.
My friend and I, lets call her Katie, decided to schedule our orientations on the sa... | 7 | 23.285714 | |
1404754451 | 1404799233 | t3_2a2cvb | t5_2to41 | 127 | ChefSaltyBallz: TIFU by emailing under the alias 'Fuhrer Habib'
Today my manager tells me to email a digital printing company and order 60 flyers for the swimming pool at which I work. I go into Gmail, unaware that I am still logged into my alternate Gmail account which is named 'Fuhrer Habib'. So at any time now, this... | 6 | 21.166667 | |
1404754950 | 1404806488 | t3_2a2ds3 | t5_2to41 | 104 | [deleted]: TIFU by wearing jeans straight out of the dryer.
I was in a hurry, decided not to wear boxers and the zipper was hot as fuck. My loins are still on fire.
PM_ME_Your_Best_Part: Ouch! I hate jeans out the dryer simply because they're tight. Day old jeans are the best.
beardface84: Got to disagree here, the ti... | 7 | 14.857143 | |
1404750630 | 1404787080 | t3_2a25yj | t5_2to41 | 81 | [deleted]: TIFU by leaving a towel on the floor
Me and my now ex-girlfriend are bored sitting around the living room area. Our relationship at the time was doing great and we tear off each others clothes any chance we got. Well her parents are gone and her older brother, who introduced us, is getting ready for a shower... | 5 | 16.2 | |
1404755476 | 1404768350 | t3_2a2er8 | t5_2to41 | 26 | IAnsMathProbs4TitPic: TIFU By getting peed on by grandma.
Ok, so every year my family goes scalloping in aripeka FL around this time of year. So just like any other year, we are out on the pontoon boat, at the usual spot, throwing scallops onto the boat, while my dad shucks them. I'm not having the best of luck, so I d... | 4 | 6.5 | |
1404757552 | 1404764204 | t3_2a2iln | t5_2to41 | 139 | Mind-Reflections: TIFU by sending the whole office my honest opinions of every staff member.
I'll keep it short and sweet. Our office is doing this random anonymous email, where we all detail what we like about each person, or if we don't like anything about a particular someone, to move on from their name. I decided t... | 6 | 23.166667 | |
1404761001 | 1405121027 | t3_2a2oyw | t5_2to41 | 44 | GG_noob_GG: TIFU by doing work experience. NSFW
So here in England it's common to do work experience (as I'm sure it is in many other countries) , which is where we go in to a company, or in my case the local council, for a week or two. The idea is that we help them out, or just observe what they're doing and how they'... | 3 | 14.666667 | |
1404763542 | 1404770203 | t3_2a2tlc | t5_2to41 | 10 | rifup: TIFU- I tried to touch my friend's(female) "cookie". (also it wasn't today)
So I recently had dinner with a friend (with the potential of being more than friends). Nice girl, pretty, and good personality. Everything was going good that night. While I made dinner, during dinner and after dinner we did a lot of ... | 6 | 1.666667 | |
1404764617 | 1404767094 | t3_2a2vhn | t5_2to41 | 11 | ApRaXiA-: TIFU by Leaving Wallet in My Car
(TIFU) Never leave your wallet in you're vehicle even if it is out of sight; Someone broke into my car last night, along with several others and walked away with my Social Security Card, Birth Certificate, Drivers License, Military ID and every card in my wallet. Moral of they... | 3 | 3.666667 | |
1404767562 | 1404786459 | t3_2a30ym | t5_2to41 | 99 | [deleted]: TIFU by laughing to hard after sex
So last week I was having sex with my best friend who I had been wanting to sleep with for a long time. Now a background of sexual history, I've slept with a couple of different guys but nothing too special, pretty boring. But this guy was amazing. Onward with the story. So... | 4 | 24.75 | |
1404766325 | 1404834221 | t3_2a2ykk | t5_2to41 | 3 | manwalker1: TIFU Leaving work early before a holiday...
This was Thursday last week (3rd of July). I had finished up all my work and helped out another Associate and was done with everything around 1:00. My dad texts me and asks if I want to golf back home around 3:45ish (45min away from where i work/live). I say sure ... | 3 | 1 | |
1404767527 | 1404778589 | t3_2a30wf | t5_2to41 | 29 | lifeisnotathrowaway: TIFU by accidentally leaving my AirPlay on.
So, this happened literally 5 minutes ago and I thought the best thing to do was immediately leave and post my fuck up on reddit.
So, my friend and I were watching videos on my phone through the TV, which was connected to the AppleTV. After about 3 hours... | 4 | 7.25 | |
1404771718 | 1404846591 | t3_2a38jc | t5_2to41 | 347 | jjmieds: TIFU by having sex when my girlfriend's family was home
My girlfriend had been on vacation for two weeks. Even with tugging my wanker, I was desperate to get my tip wet. She arrived on a nice Saturday afternoon, and I was there waiting. I helped her family unload the car and headed inside. Without hesitation ... | 10 | 34.7 | |
1404770538 | 1404796495 | t3_2a36dw | t5_2to41 | 28 | originnnn: TIFU by chromecasting porn to the family tv NSFW
before i get into it (again!) let me briefly explain what a chromecast is, its a device that lets you stream content to a TV.
As with most grim tales this one starts in a blissful place, i was watching movies with my family and decided to bring down the chr... | 3 | 9.333333 |
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